#ugh I’m so worried about my cat even though she’s technically fine

[yallwildinrn]

.

[thearvariblues]

Sing Me a Song

“You Geralt of Rivia’s bard?”

Jaskier looks up from his notepad and grins at the man who’s just sat at the opposite side of the table.

“Technically, I used to be,” the bard says, taking a sip of his ale. “We had a tiny misunderstanding last year. I’m sure he’s gonna be fine, though, I’m just giving him some time to cool down and wallow in self-pity.”

Jaskier frowns, because his brain has finally caught up with his mouth and informs him that even though the man who asked the question is very pretty (and he is – a bit short, but lean and clearly very agile, brown-skinned, with dark, wavy hair and stunningly unnatural green eyes), he also has got two big, scary swords strapped to his back, way too many scars and has, in fact, only one green eye, the other being covered by an eye patch, presumably missing.

And then there’s the Cat school medallion on his chest.

As Geralt would say… fuck.

“Unless you’re here to kidnap me and torture me to lure him into a trap. If that’s the case, I’ve never met a Geralt of Rivia in my life. Also, if you harm a hair on my head, he will hunt you down and kill you, very slowly and painfully. Just a heads up,” Jaskier smiles, utterly failing to sound at least a little bit threatening.

“Thanks for the warning,” the Witcher laughs. “But I actually need you to write me a song.”

“Sorry, I’m afraid this bard already has a Witcher to praise,” Jaskier protests, shaking his head firmly.

“Ugh. Who says I want praise?” the man says, making a face. “I just can’t seem to find a friend of mine, so I need to make him find me.”

“With a song? Do I look like a fucking pied piper?” Jaskier smirks.

“A little, yeah.”

“Fair enough. What’s in it for me?”

“What do you think is going to happen once Geralt hears that his bard has found himself a new muse?” the Witcher grins.

“Oh,” Jaskier says, chuckling. “Oh, but that’s good.”

“Are you in, then?”

“Absolutely. And, uhm… What did you say your name was?”

“By the gods, where are my manners?” the Witcher laughs. “I’m Aiden.”

*

Geralt places two tankards of ale on the table and sits down with a grunt.

“Don’t tell me you’re getting old, Wolf,” his brother Lambert smirks and promptly pulls one of the tankards closer. “Because that almost sounded like Vesemir when he’s trying to get up from his chair.”

“You’re so fucking funny,” Geralt murmurs.

“I know, right?” Lambert grins, tucking a strand of curly red hair behind his ear. “So, how’s life on the Path without your beloved bard?”

“Not my bard.”

“So pretty fucking terrible, eh?” Lambert chuckles.

“Fuck off, Lambert.”

“You’re being very nice and friendly today, you know?”

“I bought you a drink. So shut up and… drink.”

Lambert shrugs and for once does what he’s told. Within a few seconds, half of the tankard’s content vanishes.

“If it’s any consolation, life without my Cat is also pretty fucking unbearable,” he says then.

“Hm.”

“Oh, really, Geralt? You’re using your famous hm against me? Me, your brother?!”

Geralt groans.

“By the gods… Why can’t I just run into Eskel for once? Why does it always have to be you?”

“You’re just lucky, I guess.”

“Lucky. Yeah.”

Lambert rolls his eyes and focuses on his ale again – until the local bard grabs his lute and starts playing a slow, romantic ballad. Lambert growls.

“Fuck, I hate that song!”

“Why?” Geralt blinks, because he’s never heard the song before, and to be perfectly honest, it doesn’t really sound that bad.

“A brown-skinned woman with dark hair who’s seemingly killed, then comes back to life already plotting her revenge, only to find out that her lover’s already avenged her? Always reminds me of Aiden.”

“Aiden wasn’t exactly… A woman, was he?”

“He also hasn’t come back to life, as far as I know,” Lambert mutters.

“Who wrote it?” Geralt frowns, listening carefully. “It sounds like Jaskier’s work.”

“Some Master Dandelion. Never heard of him, but it seems he’s very popular now.”

“Hmmm…”

“Oh, not again!” Lambert groans.

“It just… It really does sound like Jaskier’s song.”

“You just fucking miss the bard, Geralt, that’s all.”

“No. No, I actually think…”

“That might be exactly the problem,” Lambert says and places his empty tankard back on the table. “The second round’s on me.”

*

“Seems like your plan’s not working as intended,” Jaskier comments. He’s spent weeks traveling with Aiden, and they still haven’t even heard about another Witcher trying to find them.

“I’m aware,” Aiden mutters, chewing his dinner without even noticing its taste – which is, honestly, probably for the best. “Could you be, like… less subtle?”

Jaskier shrugs.

“I suppose.”

“Fine,” Aiden nods. “Do it.”

*

“It’s a man now,” Geralt frowns, listening to the song he’s heard countless times already. “That’s new.”

“Looks like Master Dandelion might like to, uhm, dual wield,” Lambert snorts.

“It still sounds like Jaskier’s work.”

“Does Jaskier like to dual wield?”

“Hmm,” Geralt says dreamily.

“All the more reason to apologize, then, eh?”

“Oh, shut up, Lambert…”

*

“Still not working!” Aiden groans. He’s been waiting for three months for his Wolf to find him, and to no avail.

“I could, you know… Try something more obvious,” Jaskier offers.

“Please.”

*

“It’s a cat now,” Geralt blinks. “Dark-skinned, dark-haired… cat.”

Lambert sighs.

“Yeah, I hate those fucking metaphors.”

*

“I’m starting to think I should have just… kept trying to find him,” Aiden sighs, staring out of the tavern’s window.

Jaskier, cheeks still flushed from his performance, downs his ale and shakes his head.

“Don’t give up hope just yet,” he says. “I’ve already made a few changes to the song.”

“Oh, have you?” Aiden smirks. “Does it now say Lambert, I’m alive you moron, stop hiding and fucking find me?”

“Well, not yet… But almost.”

“Great. I can’t wait to hear it.”

*

Lambert is staring at yet another local bard singing the fucking ballad. He doesn’t even blink. Geralt is getting a little worried that his brother’s brain might have actually exploded.

“It says a Cat Witcher now,” he says, hoping it would get a reaction out of Lambert.

The redhead finally blinks. That’s probably good.

“A Cat Witcher who comes back to life only to find out his Wolf lover has already avenged him,” Geralt adds.

Lambert blinks again.

“And you know, I’m almost sure that this Master Dandelion is just Jaskier’s new alias.”

“I’m gonna fucking kill him,” Lambert mutters when the song finally comes to its end.

“Which one of them?” Geralt smirks.

“Both of them!” Lambert growls. “I swear to gods, if I find out your stupid bard stole my Cat…”

“Excuse me, madam,” Geralt says to the innkeeper who’s just brought them their dinner. “Where did your bard learn this song?”

“That sappy ballad?” the innkeeper frowns. “From this Master Dandelion himself. He passed through the town last week with a Witcher.”

“And Master Dandelion…”

“You know the bard that calls himself Jaskier? It’s him with a fancy hat on,” she smirks.

“About this Witcher,” Lambert growls. “Does he look like in the song?”

“Pretty much, yeah. Kind of small for a Witcher, and almost too pretty, you know, but we had a little griffin problem and he slayed that beast like it was nothing, so…”

“I’m so gonna kill them both,” Lambert murmurs while Geralt has to try very hard not to chuckle.

“Would you happen to know where were they heading?” he asks.

“I would,” the woman says and looks at the Witcher expectantly.

“I see,” Geralt sighs. “You have another monster problem, don’t you?”

“Well. It turns out the griffin probably had a mate…”

“Of course it fucking did,” Geralt nods and picks up his fork. He simply refuses to deal with this with an empty stomach…

*

Jaskier critically eyes the clothes he’s picked for tonight’s performance.

“What do you think, Aiden?” he asks his companion. “Isn’t the purple a bit too much? It’s a small town, after all. Wouldn’t the steel blue look better?”

“I don’t know, I like the red one best,” Aiden shrugs from his spot on the bed.

“Yeah, yeah, I know. Reminds you of Lambert’s hair,” Jaskier says, rolling his eyes. “Melitele’s tits, I wish he’d find us already, because this is getting really–”

As if on cue, the door of the room slams open and a big, red-haired man walks in.

“You fucking bitch!” he yells when he sees Aiden.

The dark-haired Witcher beams and gets to his feet.

“Lambs!”

“Oh. Okay. That was fast,” Jaskier nods.

Lambert growls and grabs Aiden by the collar.

“Asshole!” he hisses. “I fucking mourned you!”

“Oh, honey, that’s so sweet,” Aiden smiles.

Lambert pushes him against the wall, so hard that Aiden grunts.

“I cried for you!”

“In my defense, it wasn’t exactly my fault,” Aiden smiles.

Jaskier inches towards the door.

“I guess I’ll just… leave you two to it.”

Needless to say, Lambert ignores him completely.

“I fucking avenged you!”

“Yes, that was very kind of you,” Aiden grins, utterly unaffected by Lambert’s angry face so close to his own. “You saved me a lot of trouble.”

Lambert groans, buries his face in Aiden’s shoulder and sighs deeply.

“You fucker,” he mutters.

“Yeah, I missed you too, puppy,” Aiden smiles, wrapping his arms around Lambert.

Jaskier, who’s already standing in the doorway, places his hand on his heart and takes a deep breath.

“Oh,” he whispers. “I shall write the most beautiful ballad about this… Ow!”

He’s unceremoniously dragged out of the room and this time it’s his turned to be slammed against the wall by a big, angry Witcher – but this one is white-haired and dressed all in black.

“Geralt!” Jaskier exclaims, his face brightening up.

“You won’t write a fucking thing,” Geralt growls.

“Is that so? May I ask why, dear heart?”

“Because you’re mine. My bard. And if I ever find out you’re writing about another Witcher again–”

“Then what?” Jaskier asks, cocking his head. “But before you answer, I’d like to remind you that I am not yours anymore, as you have made it quite clear on the mountain that you are not interested in having me as a companion–”

Jaskier is effectively shut up by Geralt’s lips pressing against his with determination that makes it absolutely clear that Geralt hasn’t merely lost his balance and happened to be falling in Jaskier’s general direction.

“Mine,” he growls.

“Well,” Jaskier sighs, slipping his fingers into Geralt’s hair. “When you put it like that… Fuck the mountain, I suppose.”

“Fuck the mountain,” Geralt agrees. “But I’m sorry. For what I said.”

“Apology very much accepted,” Jaskier laughs. “I’d ask you to fuck me, but I’m afraid my room is currently… occupied.”

Lambert’s loud moan only confirms Jaskier’s statement.

“Hm,” Geralt hums. “Do you think this tavern has a bath? I think I still have some griffin blood in my hair from last week.”

“Oh,” Jaskier purrs. “Oh, yes. And I’m sure I could get some chamomile oil…”

They hear another moan, this time Aiden’s.

“What are we waiting for, then?” Geralt grins and grabs Jaskier’s hand. “Come on, bard. We have some catching up to do…”

[princess-of-the-corner]

Lila trying convince people Mari works for Hawkmoth "Ladybug told me she refuses to give Mari a miraculous, I think we need to question why she thinks Mari would be a bad holder" and immediately after that Mari is outed as Multimouse

I uh. I got carried away answering this one. 

           “Hey,” Alya said, leaning over the desk. “Since you’re friends with Ladybug, you have influence on who she chooses to be new Heroes, right?”

           “She does take my choices into account,” Lila grinned. “I can’t tell you who anyone is though! Of course, we must uphold secret identities!”

           The implication was lost on Alya. But not Adrien. Perhaps he should encourage this line of discussion. Maybe Lila would ‘confess’ to being the Fox Hero. That’d really be some ‘proof’.

           “I know,” Alya said. “But… I know you haven’t gotten along, but maybe you could suggest Marinette?”

           “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” Lila frowned.

           “Again, I know you two don’t get along well,” she said. “But I think that offering an olive branch like that might help you two, you know. Bury the hatchet and all that.”

           “I-it’s not that I don’t want to,” she sighed. “I’ve actually tried, with that exact idea in mind! But… Ladybug doesn’t think it’s a good idea.”

           “How is it not a good idea?” she wondered. “Mari’s… Mari. The only non-heroic quality she has is her clumsiness! And Ladybug let Chloé be a Hero!”

           “I heard that, jackass!” Chloé said from her seat, lazily flipping them off. “It’s true but you shouldn’t say it.”

           Adrien laughed at that. Especially because Alya just gave an exasperated smile and eyeroll instead of derailing this into an argument. Progress on friendship!

           “I don’t know the details,” Lila said. “But when I suggested that Ladybug choose Marinette, she refused. All Ladybug said was that she ‘had suspicions’. But… you’re right. If Ladybug gave Chloé a Miraculous but thinks giving one to Marinette is a bad idea…. Maybe we should examine why.”

           Oh. So that was her game. Well, as much as Adrien wanted to say something about that, there was already a plan in place to keep it from going too far. Perhaps it would be better if Marinette didn’t know about this one.

           Though he would later tell her that Alya still defended her from Lila’s implied accusation. Manipulation was a powerful tool, but try too big a lie too soon and it’d fall apart. Lila had too much faith in her abilities, and not enough in how wonderful Marinette was.

           So instead, he rolled his eyes and focused on the girl in question, who had just scrambled into the classroom seconds before the bell rang. And by ‘scrambled’, he of course means she ran in and tripped, landing on the floor in front of his desk.

           “Morning, Bugaboo,” Adrien grinned. “Glad to see you’re still falling for me!”

           “Just for that, you don’t get breakfast,” Marinette teased, holding up a somehow-not-crushed bag of pastries.

           “Wait, no, I’m sorry!”

-

           Alya was filming again. Of course she was. She had to get footage for the Ladyblog! And be nearby in case Rena Rouge is needed. Though she had learned her lesson about getting too close to the battles, and was safely with the rest of the crowd of reporters and curious passerby, all recording as well.

           However, the Akuma of the Day was not her intrest right now. It was the new Hero! A girl in a gray and pink costume, her hair in two buns. She was adorable!

           While Ladybug stood back, observing the battle, Chat Noir and the new Hero, Multimouse, fought the Akuma.

           Alya winced when Multimouse got grabbed and thrown, landing near the crowd. She tumbled, rolling on the road. The force must’ve been enough to slip her Miraculous off, as there was a flash of pink.

           Even if Alya had the reflexes to cut off her own video, and wasn’t frozen in shock, all the other people recording would have footage of this reveal.

           As the pink flash ended, Alya watched as Marinette got up, shaking her head. The girl looked panicked, realizing her Miraculous was gone. Even more panicked when she saw she was on live tv.

           Chat had followed to make sure she was okay, and was just as panicked. He landed, helping her up just as she found the necklace.

           “It’s fine,” Marinette swallowed. “I- I’m fine. Let me finish the fight and you guys can have this back, okay?”

           “If you’re sure,” Chat said. “Too bad about the identity thing. I mean, Ladybug and I have been so excited to get you on the team for a while, after all the times you helped us without powers. Kinda sucks I won’t get to enjoy you being a Teammate more often!”

           “Chat, Multimouse!” Ladybug shouted from the rooftop. “Fall back and regroup!”

           Nodding, Marinette gave a sheepish wave to the cameras before calling her Transformation again. The Cat chased the Mouse back to the rooftops and away from the fight.

           This… didn’t make sense. Hadn’t Lila said that Ladybug was refusing to give Marinette a Miraculous? And while Alya assured her that Ladybug’s suspicions of Marinette possibly being connected to how many times the Class was Akumatized was just paranoia, Alya had thought that Ladybug had already made up her mind.

           Had Lila only said that to cover that Ladybug was choosing Marinette? Then why say all that about how Marinette was ‘suspicious’? It doesn’t make sense. Maybe Lila talked to her again and changed her mind?

           No. That doesn’t make sense either. Chat said that he and Ladybug were looking forward to ‘Multimouse’ for a while.

           Did Ladybug just tell Lila that to keep the info secret? No that still doesn’t make sense. It brings her back to ‘why say she’s ‘suspicious’’?

           She’d have to look more into it.

-

           Multimouse landed on top of a rooftop, with ‘Ladybug’ and ‘Chat Noir following her.

           ‘Reality!’.

           ‘Ladybug’ turned into orange mist. ‘Chat’ seemed to as well at first, before solidifying into Silver Fox. God she hated that name. But it was technically the term for an actual black-furred fox. Somehow.

           “Ugh,” Silver groaned, nearly collapsing against her. “How in the hell did you do this the first time? Making ‘Ladybug’ act like you is hard enough without having to constantly wrap an Illusion around myself.”

           “I am the creative one out of both of us,” Multimouse said. “How’re you doing though? Using both of those must be tiring.”

           “A little,” he replied. “I might take a nap after this.”

           As half of Silver Fox’s transformation dropped, leaving just Chat Noir, Multimouse dropped her own transformation. Letting the Kwamis rest, Marinette pulled some snacks out of her purse.

           “This is fun!” Trixx said, his mouth full of blueberry scone.

           “It is,” Mullo agreed, munching on a cracker. “We’ve been helpful though, right?”

           “Very, Marinette nodded, petting the Kwami’s head. “Now there’s footage of Ladybug and I in the same place. No one will be able to connect us.”

           “We still need to finish the fight,” Chat said. “That means we still need Trixx.”

           “Aw man,” Trixx sighed.

           “You really need to work on your work ethic,” Tikki mused, appearing from wherever she had been hiding.

           “Do you need me again?” Mullo asked.

           “Nope,” Marinette answered. “Silver Fox will make an Illusion of Multimouse this time, while Ladybug fights for real. I do need to purify the Butterfly, once the fight’s over. Stay nearby and at the ready in case something happens though.”

           “You ready to go again?” Chat asked.

           “I guess,” Trixx sighed, popping the rest of the scone in his mouth.

           “Still less lazy than Plagg,” Tikki muttered.

           “Trixx, Let’s Pounce!”

           “Tikki, Spots On!”

           Ladybug stretched, while Silver Fox yawned. With a soft smile, she kissed his cheek. That seemed to perk him up a little bit.

           “Make sure to keep ‘Multimouse’ back a bit,” Ladybug said. “Don’t need her getting hit and ruining the whole thing. And when we get to the fight, the Butterfly’s in the Akuma’s hairpin. We need to get it quick before your Mirage runs out.”

           “Don’t worry,” Silver said. “I believe in you. So do most people.”

           “Most people?” she wondered.

           “A certain liar might’ve said something this morning,” he shrugged. “Don’t worry. With the appearance of Multimouse, her claim is being quickly forgotten. Or someone might catch on.”

           She frowned, wondering exactly what was said. Oh well. She’d deal with it later.

-

           Turns out ‘later’ meant walking into a goddamn riot when she got back to class.

[pastaaa-bird]

Day 4:historical

@aphrarepairweek2021

Sorryforbeingadaylate

Oh warning for very minor swearing(only happens three times) but other then that there is nothing inappropriate and also there is implied period typical homophobia in this

Summary: An 80s human AU where a stressed out Chiara (nyo Romano) is saved from going crazy by a hero(Amelia aka nyo America)

Basically this is just fluff, fluff and more fluff

Chiara Vargas was a second a way from flipping her desk and raging down the halls, or at least she would be if she had not possessed just enough self control to hold back on the urge.

“Fuck fuck fuck….” Chiara muttered, the sound coming out muffled from her face being squished against her desk in failure.

“OH, CHIARA” came a high pitch voice down stairs.

Reluctantly she lifted her head to the sound.

“WHAT?I'M BUSY”,she yelled back, mentally cursing her brother for disturbing her sulking.

“A CERTAIN SOMEONE IS HERE FOR YOU",

“WHO IS IT?”,

“YOU'LL HAVE TO COME DOWN AND SEE",

After managing to hold back a bitter protest she stood up then stormed down stairs.

“This better be worth my time, Feli or l swear to Dio l’ll-",

Chiara came to a halt once she saw the girl beside Feliciano.

“Hey!” a cheerful voice as usual from the smiling blonde with pink sunglasses in her hair, dressed in her demine shorts,  red t-shirt and long white socks with a pair of roughed up old sneakers.

“Amelia- uh hi there" She replied while awkwardly fidgeted with the sleeves of her jacket, embarrassed at the realisation that she had heard her yelling.

“Nice to see you calm down, anyway l’ll you two ladies to it”, he winked at Chiara who rolled her eyes at the look, not sure whether to love or hate that it felt the exact same to when her grandfather would make comments about her bringing a boyfriend home.

He disappeared into the sitting room to join Valentino on the couch.

“I was wondering if you would want to hang out, we haven't done that for ages”,

“Oh right, ugh l don't think l can”,

“Sure you can! You're not busy are you?”,

“l am, study”,

Amelia raised an eyebrow at that.

“Study? Our exams aren't till two weeks" ,

“I know, l know but l'm sick of revising everything on the night before the exam, besides l need as much of time as possible to understand this crap",

“Ah fair enough- how about l help ya with it? math l'm guessing?”,

Sighing at the memory of her many failed attempts at completing and understanding equations and formulas she nodded.

“Yeah, but are you sure?”,

“Definitely!”, stated Amelia with both hands on her hips and standing tall to her eagerness for the task.

“Alright then...",

A while later Chiara found her self back at her desk with Amelia standing beside her reading over her practice questions, nervously waiting for the results.

It felt like an eternity before Amelia finally looked up and spoke.

“And…that's like sixty five percent right!”,

“Sixty five?! Where did l go wrong this time?!”,

They had been at this for quite some time now. Despite Chiara’s frustration she stayed relativity calm for the most part thanks to Amelia’s encouragement and little jokes that made her either outright laugh or complain due to what she claimed was annoyance even if though she did find it humorous.

“Symbols, you forgot them again, there's supposed to be a measurement symbol at the end of this to say whether it's centimetres squared or cubed or meters squared- eh you get the point...", she paused then continued.

Miss Kirkland is your math teacher, right? She's real strict when it comes to small stuff like that so she takes off a lot of marks”, explained Amelia while doodling with the pen in the corner of the practice sheet of paper Chiara had used.

Miss Kirkland, certified smartass- even if it is technically her job to be one. Now, Chiara didn’t exactly hate her but she was far from a favourite in terms of teachers she was forced to put up with.

She hated how Miss Kirkland loved to call on those who she knew where not paying attention, there was a sense of snobbishness when it came to the way Miss Kirkland would proudly correct the unsuspecting student with a smile that more closely resembled a smirk.

“l hate this, I'm so close to getting this right but l keep screwing it up”,

“Come on it's fine! You've made awesome progress since when we started! It's only been like what….an hour? Give yourself some credit",

“…l guess you're right. But I'm also stuck for other things- like history and geography suck",

“ Wanna head to the library? They got good resources for both”, questioned Amelia now looking up from her doodling.

“Nah, I've had enough school for today. Let's do something else, anything in mind?”,

“Ooh! A few things-“,

Understandably Chiara was not surprised when they had arrived at the arcade on their bikes.

“Is this becoming an addiction for you?”,

“Ha-ha very funny, you have your obsessions and l have mine”,

“You even call it obsession, keep all this up and l'll be hosting an intervention for you",

This time Amelia genuinely laughed in response, Chiara savoured every second of the sound.

They were stuck there for a while, when it came to Amelia's great interest and Chiara’s competitive attitude it was easy to guess that there would obviously be competitions to see who could score the highest.

To Chiara’s dislike Amelia ended up winning proportionally more then she did followed by listening to the victory taunts from Amelia.

And it seemed that as quickly as they arrived they where off again.

“No, no, no, nah, no, nope, no”,

“Oh come on! l thought you weren't a quitter”,

“I have my exceptions, this is one of them",

Roller skating, she wanted Chiara to roller skate. Clearly Amelia wasn't aware of the fact that Chiara would likely crawl into the ground out of embarrassment if she would likely- no when, when she would end up falling flat on the floor.

“l'll help ya along! You'll be fine", urged Amelia tilting her head to the side with pleading eyes.

Upon arrival to the centre she instantly felt her heart sink knowing what would be expected her. After much convincing from Amelia and equally as much rants about what could go wrong from Chiara- she ended up agreeing to at least attempting to skate.

Chiara felt her chest tighten and face heat up once she suddenly felt the hand of Amelia intertwine with her own, guiding her into the skating area after they got their roller blades.

It was fascinated to see how effortlessly Amelia could move, practically gliding with ease although at a much slower pace due to guiding Chiara along. For this moment anyway, Chiara forgot how to feel anxious.

The last destination for the day was the local diner.

“Two milkshakes please, a double chocolate for myself and a strawberry and banana mix for her”,

“Coming right up, dear", replied the waitress.

“Oh and don't worry l'm paying, l owe ya for last time with the ice-creams” reassured Amelia after she placed their order.

It was the small things that Chiara adored about Amelia the most, how she remembered her favourite foods was one of them. Along with her passing small notes with funny faces on them to her whenever they shared a class and she had noticed that Chiara was dying of boredom.

They sat on the high chairs in front of the counter top as they awaited her drinks, Amelia flapped her hands with giddy excitement once they were received, Chiara couldn't help smile at the sight.

She thought about sharing the milkshake together, putting the straw in her drink like those shitty romantic movies Amelia loves so much. It would be cute wouldn't it? Cuter to see Amelia's reaction to the gesture! She smiled to herself at the idea.

Then her face dropped.

No, no they couldn't, not here, although her smile was brought back again by looking towards her girlfriend who had all her attention on blowing bubbles into her drink.

“Should you really be playing with your food like that?”, she questioned placing the straw into her own drink.

“Might as well make the most of it when my folks aren't here to tell me off ", Amelia shrugged in response.

Chiara found her self agreeing with that mentality and joined in with the childish behaviour.

They cycled back to the house, it was getting dark already.

Amelia was invited in and the two walked past the living room seeing Feliciano and Valentino with their eyes still glued to their precious TV.

At peace now they were sat together on the back porch. There was a small garden behind the Vargas' house, it was closed off by the tall fence( put there mostly so the neighbour's cat couldn't hope over and ruin the vegetable patches or flowers).

The air was humid all day and was beginning to cool down with the sun getting lower and the clouds moving in.

For what could have been anywhere from a minute to a thousand years the two spoke about anything and everything, the topics seemed to flow so easily, naturally changing with ease.

Finally the two sat in comfortable silence, looking towards the sky who’s colours had turned into oranges, yellows and pinks.

This is what Chiara so deeply enjoyed, how they could just sit together and feel so secure.

Routinely this what would be done for one another if the other was upset and asked for so, this time was often spent with their hand held or being hugged by the other.

 There would be times where Chiara in particular would wish to be alone, in cases like this Amelia would go prepare or buy a snack for whenever Chiara is feeling okay again, it gave her something to look forward to when she needed to be alone with her own depressing thoughts.

Sometimes when Amelia would be upset she would just want to vent and vent with no words of “it will be okay" or “look on the bright side of things", Chiara was there to listen and agree with the difficulty of whatever situation she found herself in.

Chiara's head was rested on Amelia’s shoulder, her arm wrapped around her in response to it.

Now it was getting cold, thankfully she still wore her jacket…but maybe…

“Amy?”,

“Yeah?”,she quietly answered back to the nickname.

“It's getting a bit…chilly don't you think? Would you, would you like my jacket?”,

“Oh...Uh sure.If you wouldn't mind that is”, a blush covered Amelia’s cheeks, she was rarely flustered or at least visibly.

The jacket was a gift to Chiara for Christmas from one of her relatives, it was given oversized to her but she kept it since it seemed more comfortable like this. On Amelia the jacket finally looked normal, it fit her well and looked quiet lovely.

They went back to silence until Chiara broke it again.

“Thanks by the way. I really needed today- to get my mind off of all this stupid fucking stress l've been trapped in lately",

“Of course. We all need a break now and then",

“You could say that again…l love you" Chiara looked up, her chin now on Amelia's shoulder.

Amelia glanced down at her and grinned.

“The feeling is mutual, sweetheart"

The end

Okay now for me rambling

Uhhhhh l read through this and l don't think l made any mistakes? I'll edit this if there are and sorry if you saw any, idk l'm bad at checking for mistakes and l don't have someone to proof read for me

Oh and Valentino is human Seborga and alsooo not sure if l made it clear but Feliciano does know about their relationship and also Chiara is Bi and happy to feel valid in her relationship with Amelia as if it were the exact same as when she is with a guy and not something taboo in this time period

ALSO damn, sorry this isn't that particular to the 80s- l did leave out things l was originally going to add in though! Like l was going to have Felicianio and Valentino have a movie marton but according to Wikipedia they werent common around then and the ones that did happen were anime soooo y e p

Also thought about adding in a house cord phone but eh idk it felt nicer to have Amelia visit instead of having Chiara call her or if l tried writting it as Amelia calling and then showing up it just felt forced and weirdly put in any way l tried to write it in

AH l am so worried that this is boring or cringy, like l honestly can't tell if it is or is this fine-ehh l guess l've written worse um yeah if you've read this far thanks :)

(I'm editing this for mistakes and wtf 90 is so high why would she be shocked- damn l think l know why l originally wrote that, l was thinking Amelia said ONE of the questions is 90% right but before it l said she was correcting multiple questions so it reads as multiple questions being 90% right all together ANYWAY l corrected it so it's fine again okay bye -AND it turns out l missed some mistakes yet again-editing this for the 3rd time rip)

[danny-chase]

Read on AO3

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Teen Titans (Comics) Rating: Not Rated Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Roy Harper & Dick Grayson & Donna Troy & Garth & Wally West, Roy Harper & Dick Grayson Characters: Roy Harper, Dick Grayson, Donna Troy, Garth, Wally West Additional Tags: Teen Titans as Family, Fab Five, POV Roy Harper, Dick Grayson Whump, Hurt/Comfort, getting stuck in small places, Dick pisses people off too much, cat carriers, Canon Typical Violence, roy is trying his best, Dick is bendy, Roy Harper is Speedy, Dick Grayson is Robin, Donna Troy is Wonder Girl, Garth is Aqualad, Wally West is Kid Flash, Dick Grayson Needs a Hug, But he gets a kiss on the head instead, No Beta We Die Like Roy Harper, Stitches, Blood, Vomit, muscle spasms, TW for Claustrophobia Series: Part 2 of Bad Things Happen Bingo Summary:

The one where Dick rescues the Teen Titans, and they immediately have to return the favor.

Roy cursed as his fingers slipped; he’d just been about to make some damned progress on the chain. But no. He was stuck, chained to a wall, in some godforsaken place. He was never gonna hear the end of it from Dick if he couldn’t get out of these cuffs.

 He slumped back against the wall of the dimly lit, empty little closet. At least Dick had gotten away. He’d owe one to Wally for listening to him.

 <em>“KF, get Speedy out of-”</em> He’d never forget the look of shock on his face when Wally scooped him up instead. Dick was gonna be pissed, they were in a lecture for sure, but Roy wasn’t dumb – he knew Dick had the best chance of getting them out of this mess.

 Especially because the JLA were off world.

 And the Teen Titans weren’t technically supposed to be going on missions right now…

 And he’d been the one to suggest they go out anyways.

 He fidgeted with the lock again, ugh. This was so embarrassing – he felt like a kid playing dress up rather than a superhero. Well, he couldn’t feel too bad – Donna and Garth had gotten grabbed first, and Wally got abducted on his way back to pick him up. So, he was at least the second to last man standing.

 The chains refused to budge – he was starting to get worried. It’d almost been an hour, they needed to get Garth out – no way fish boy would die of dehydration on his watch. If he had his bow, he could have picked this by now. He huffed in irritation as the chains slipped again, as he lost what little progress he made.

 Even if he got out the chains, he’d have to get out the door, find the others, free them, and somehow get out. And he had no idea where this even was.

 Dick could get them out of this… right?

 Maybe he should’ve let Wally get him out of there instead – but even then, what would he even do? No – he’d made the right decision. But in the eerie silence, he couldn’t help but feel a small amount of regret.

 The light coming from the bottom of the door flickered, a shadow appearing. Roy rolled to his side, trying to get a better look. There were two black boots, silently approaching. The doorhandle jiggled, quietly opening.

 He heard a shout as the door slipped open – Dick’s alarmed face appearing for half a second before recoiling. He threw a set of lockpicks in the room before Roy could hear his footsteps pounding away.

 Roy caught the lockpicks with his mouth, and carefully dropped them into his hands, immediately getting to work. He tried to tune out the sounds of a scuffle outside, tried not to worry as he heard Dick taunting whoever was out there, tried not to panic as he heard shots being fired.

 His hands shook as he finally heard the first click. His palms were getting wet with sweat – and he fumbled for a moment, the pick slipping out of his hands just as he started to work on the second lock. Fuck. He couldn’t afford to waste any more time – Dick’s taunts were starting to sound strained, from the sounds of things, he was outnumbered.

 He leaned back, grasping for the pick. More footsteps pounded through the halls.

 “For a count, you’re really bad at-” Dick’s voice cut off with a thud. Roy’s heart pounded against his chest.

 “Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuckkity fuckcakes.” His fingers finally found the picks, and he forced himself to breathe slowly, and stay calm. He could do this. It was no different then steadying his hands while using his bow. They worked under pressure all the time.

 The lock clicked open in what had to be record time. He quickly shook the cuffs off his wrist, and immediately started work on his ankles. Footsteps were walking away from him, by the time he got through, there was silence in the hall once more.

 “Shit.” He muttered, rubbing his wrists as he stood. He crept to his door, peeking out. The hall was empty to the left, though a few unconscious goons laid off to the right. He had two options. Try and find the others or try and find where Dick had gone off to. He couldn’t wait too long; Dick had a tendency to piss off his captors and Garth would need water if he’d been left high and dry.

 As he stood in the hallway, trying to make his decision, a near-silent pattering of footsteps began echoing closer. He leapt back into the room, adrenaline rushing through his veins. Quietly pulling the door shut, he held his breath.

 The quiet steps got closer, stopping in front of the door. He dropped into a defensive position, getting ready for a-

 “Speedy?” Donna whispered, cracking the door open. He sighed in relief, at least something today had gone right. She swung open the door as he waved. He was pleasantly surprised to see Garth and Wally standing behind her.

 “Where’s Rob?” Garth asked, his face falling as he scanned the empty room.

 “He asked me to get these two out and meet him here.” Wally explained hastily, pulling out a hand drawn map. Roy shook his head.

 “Sorry guys, he got grabbed while I was getting out of the cuffs.” A pit was forming in the bottom of his stomach. For something to go right with them, something else had to have gone wrong. “Follow me.” He whispered, heading off to the right.

 They slunk down the hall, trying to ignore the amount of blood and what seemed to be vomit scattered around the area where the skirmish had taken place. Roy could feel adrenaline coursing through his veins, his heart leaping into his throat every time he caught a shadow moving in the corner of his eye.

Donna slipped her hand into his, looking just as anxious as he felt. He gave her a reassuring squeeze. He signaled with his other hand for them to stop at the end of the hallway. Silently he poked his head around the corridor. A flight of stairs led up to a higher level.

 He picked his path quickly and quietly, making sure nothing squeaked or creaked. As he climbed, he was acutely aware of a steady trail of blood speckled across each step. He let go of Donna, and motioned for the others to follow in his footsteps.

 He crouched down as he reached the top. The stairs opened into the back corner of the main headquarters of these assholes. He pointed at Wally, motioning for him to join at the top. He scanned the room, hopefully Dick was in here – Wally could grab him and they’d get the fuck out. There was a wall of monitors mounted on a desk in the back (some of which showed them still neatly locked up in their rooms). A table sat in the center; a few goons sat there keeping an eye on the screen.

 His eyes followed the trail of blood across the floor, it led to a box(?) under the desk, a navy blanket covered it, obscuring its shape. He nudged Wally, pointing it out, and Wally nodded back shooing them back down the stairs.

 Garth passed him the map, wordlessly showing him the route out as he reached the bottom of the stairs. They waited a few minutes, watching as Wally stood at the top of the stairs, readying himself for the perfect moment. In the blink of an eye, Wally was in front of him, the covered box in his arms.

 He ripped off the blanket, tossing it aside. He heard Donna gasp next to him and fought to stifle his own reaction.

 “I left you alone for five minutes…” He whispered, pulling the lockpicks out again. What he assumed was Dick was crammed into a cat carrier, his side/arm(?) bulging out against the metal bars. A hefty padlock rested against the side, another on the top. Roy’s blood boiled, his vision tinting red around the edges.

 Who the fuck would do that to a kid? Dick was annoying – but this? This was-

 “Get… out first.” Dick wheezed. Roy snapped back into the present. Blood dripped from the bottom of the carrier. “Not… safe… here.” Wally passed the carrier to Donna, and together, they quietly sprinted towards the exit.

   “I’m going to kill them.” Roy swore, from the safety of their Titans sub (because of course the base was underwater, why not?!?). He angrily attacked the lock with the tools.

 “’s fine.” Dick’s muffled voice peeped out from the cage.

 “We’re all safe.” Donna nervously stated from the driver’s seat. “That’s what’s matters.”

 “Does he look safe to you?!?” Roy yelled, the lockpick nearly snapping in his hands. “Safe my ass. What the hell?!?”

 “Uh, you should calm down a bit, or you’re not gonna get him out.” Garth noted.

 “’as a point.” Came Dick’s muffled response. Roy huffed, focusing on his work. Finally, the lock popped open. He opened the front door, freeing up some space, and started on the latch at the top.

 “How the hell did he fit in there?” Wally muttered disbelievingly. “All of you is in there, right?” He asked, eyes wide with worry. Roy clenched his tools.

 “He better all be in there.” He spat.

 “I think I am.” Dick replied. Garth timidly walked around the edge of the table, and poked Dick’s side.

 “Are you okay?” He asked, lifting the shirt to reveal the imprint of the cage. “There’s blood leaking out of the bottom.”

 “Garth, I wouldn’t call this okay.” Wally replied, waving widely at the situation.

 “Finally.” Roy muttered, missing Dick’s response as the top lock popped open. He threw open the door. “HOLY FUCK!” He screamed; people were NOT supposed to bend that way.

 “It’s not as bad as it looks.” Dick’s head popped out of the cage. “But… I can’t feel my legs… and I think my shoulders are dislocated.”

 “Rate your pain?” Donna called back.

 “I’m fine. My limbs fell asleep… like twenty minutes ago.” Dick replied.

 Wally threw up in the trash can in the back as Garth attempted to carefully pry Dick out. He’d been tucked into a tiny little ball of limbs, folded neatly in half, his legs pressed to his collarbones, and his arms folded in on themselves.

 Roy plopped on the ground. “What the fuck is wrong with them? What the actual fuck?!” He crawled over to join Wally. “Who puts a kid in that tight of a cage?” His stomach flipped, and he leaned over the trash can, waiting until he was sure he was safe – and thankfully, not losing his lunch.

 “Can I just break this?” Garth asked, gesturing to the carrier.

 “Be careful with him.” Donna warned from the front. “You don’t want him to get cut on any sharp edges.”

 “Whatever you do… could you hurry it up? Breathing… is kind of hard like this.” Dick wheezed. “Just get me out.”

 Garth yanked at the side of the crate, slowly bending its aluminum frame. Eventually it snapped off, and Dick practically poured out in a puddle of limp limbs.

 Roy rushed back to the table, he and Garth slowly helped Dick lie flat. Dick flinched at the movement.

 “Is it okay for his back to have bent like that?” Garth asked. “I don’t know about humans, but uhh…”

 “’m bendy, it’s fine.” Dick hissed through clenched teeth. “Roy woulda snapped.” He ignored the jab, there were more pressing matters.

 “Grab the collar just in case.” Donna instructed from the front. A rush of wind and Wally passed a cervical brace to Garth.

 “Unnecessary.” Dick groaned, as Garth carefully strapped it on.

 “Mm, sure, Batboy. Can you even feel that?” Roy muttered, probing a gash in his side. Dick groaned in response. “I’ll take that as a maybe. You need stitches, and we probably shouldn’t wait any longer.” Wally handed him a medical kit an instant later. He quickly wiped down the cut. “Guys, hold him still.” Dick squeezed his eyes shut as his muscles began spasming. Roy began threading a needle.

 “Wally swap with me.” Donna jogged back, hopping up on the table, sweeping Dick’s torso into her lap, cradling his head. Garth popped up next to her, gently massaging his twitching limbs. Roy held his breath, steadying his hands, and sewed his side back together.

 Dick gasped in pain throughout the ordeal, but it was hard to tell if was from the stitches or the muscle cramps. “Sorry.” Roy muttered as he finished tying up the end knot. “I’m sorry we got caught.”

 “Us too.” Wally’s knuckles were white as he grasped the steering wheel.

 “I’m sorry for this.” Garth apologized hesitating only slightly before popping one of Dick’s shoulders back into its socket. He yelped reflexively, trying to curl around the arm.

 “Sorry, sweetheart.” Donna tugged him gently into a flat position as Garth moved to the other side.

 “Please.” Dick asked quietly, eyes staring blankly at the roof. Sweat trickling down his brow – mixing with what looked suspiciously like tears, as Garth grabbed his arm. “Don’t-ahg” The second shoulder popped back in place.

 “Sorry.” Garth repeated sadly, rubbing the knots out of Dick’s triceps as some kind of apology. Roy wrapped the fresh stitches the best he could, as Dick continued to spasm uncontrollably, writhing in place.

 Roy leaned against the table, massaging Dick’s calf, it was rock hard – Roy cringed internally as he began working out the knots. “Sorry, kid.” He was only a year and a half older, but Dick was always so small for his age.

 “’m not a kid.” He grumbled back, “’sides, I’m sorry you guys had to save my ass.”

 “What are friends for?” Garth asked, leaning against Donna as he cradled Dick’s hand, gently curling and uncurling each finger.

 “For getting you out of cat carriers apparently.” He joked. “You know, maybe he’s really been a cat this whole time.” The muscles finally relaxed under his hands, and Roy moved onto the next one.

 “He’s bendy like a cat, and he does always seem to land on his feet.” Wally chimed in. Roy glanced up, watching as they approached their base.

 “Not always.” Dick groaned, closing his eyes again.

 “Well, at least you have friends who can catch you.” Donna smiled, gathering Dick up in her arms.

 “Thanks.” He replied quietly.

 “Thanks for coming after us.” Roy whispered back. Dick opened one eye.

 “Always.” He promised. “Thanks for coming after me.” Roy pressed a quick kiss to the top of his head.

 “Always.”

[peterstanslizzie]

Reacting To: Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts (Season 3 Episode 4)

Ughhhhh :’(

Episode Title: Don’t You Forget a Meow Me

Spoiler Warning: Kindly proceed if you’ve already seen the episode or are able to handle spoilers

1. First of all, what a cute episode title! LOL. The episode opens with Yumyan, Asher and Dahlia trying to catch a butterfly mute from the tree tops but the butterfly has a brain and is able to flee lol. And he has such a bro voice. Cool! We get to see a close-up of Asher; They look so good with short hair.

2. Dahlia spots Zane, who is about to fire his crossbow at someone but Yumyan and the others took care of him:

3. Back inside, everybody is having pancakes for dinner but they’re interrupted by Zane’s presence. He has a message for Kipo from Emilia and she wants Kipo to meet her at the water treatment facility in 3 hours to get cured. Kipo doesn’t seem to have a choice but to follow her instruction because Wolf, Benson and Dave have been captured by Emilia all thanks to that spineless backstabber, Margot. But I’m so pumped now because I feel like things are gonna get epic and serious from this point onwards. 

4. Kipo immediately runs off to get to Emilia but is thankfully stopped by Song before she makes another bad decision. Kipo is frustrated that Emilia still has power even though she thinks she has already completely destroyed the research journal, which we know it wasn’t completely disintegrated.

5. They head back to the village to discuss a new game plan. Song tries to give her input and it sounds pretty legit but it’s a shame nobody is understanding her. I have a feeling this is where Mulholland is gonna come in. 

I actually think Zane’s lowkey fine....don’t judge lol

6. But what’s even better is that they know Zane is aware of Emilia’s secret plan and Kipo brilliantly comes up with the idea to trick him into drinking water with Mulholland in it in order to get inside his thoughts. Mulholland is such a useful ally to have. 

Poor Scarlemagne is getting tossed around in that glass cell, ouch!

7. We switch things over to Scarlemagne, who is having a conversation with Song! Song looks like she’s expressing her worries to him but Scarlemagne, too, doesn’t get what she’s trying to say. Sometimes I find myself forgetting that these two had somewhat of a mother-son relationship. 

8. Mulholland manages to retrieve the info from Zane’s brain and he tells the others that Emilia only has 2 doses of the cure, thanks to the fur Kipo left back in episode 2. Also, he reveals (or mentally shows) to them that Wolf, Benson and Dave are tied up with a bomb nearby so that in case anyone tries to rescue them, Emilia and her crew will cause the bomb to explode. Yikes!

9. Kipo wonders if Mulholland could get into Emilia’s head to turn her good but he says it’s too risky because if he gets mixed in with the cure, there is a possibility he would de-mute everyone. Double yikes! But I think it’s a plan worth considering if none of their other plans work because at least Dr. Emilia hasn’t been introduced to Mulholland, I think. 

Mandu is literally me if I were watching over a bad guy

10. Side note: Where is Troy throughout all of this? His boyfriend is captured and threatened by the bad guys. I want to know his reaction. Anyways, with the help of Mulholland, Kipo, Lio and Yumyan then go through an imaginary test-run of their rescue mission but they quickly fail because Kipo is too fearful. Why though? Is it because her friends are in danger? But that didn’t stop her in episode 2 when Jamack was captured. Weird, right? 

11. Yumyan and Lio try to advise Kipo on how to stay calm and not be too afraid when facing Emilia. Yumyan definitely got through to Kipo a little more because he reminds her of the time in Season 1 when she pushed him to take charge. Afterwards, Kipo seems to feel a lot better and she then tries another simulation....and another...and I guess another but she’s always failing. Really, Kipo?

12. Awww, the way those Timberkittens call Scarlemagne’s name was so adorable!  Also, are their names really Scrumples and Snugglemuffin? Or are those nicknames given to them by Scarlemagne. If so, omg that’s so precious! So now, Scarlemagne is trying to teach Song to speak using alphabet blocks just like how she taught him when he was just a child and when she was still a human. 

13. Back to Kipo’s test-runs; She’s still failing miserably in them. She can’t seem to avoid Emilia’s darts for some reason, specifically the second dart she shoots at her. Well, she better figure out a strategy quick because the deadline to respond to Emilia is almost here.

14. Next, we see Song and Scarlemagne playing charades with the latter trying to guess what’s she’s gesturing. It’s funny that Song doesn’t know how to read or write but she sure does know how to listen to the others almost perfectly lol. Eventually, he manages to guess a word that is similar to “feeling” so far. Hmm...

15. It’s times up and Mulholland decides to bid his farewell for the good of the mutes. He feels like him being around them would be dangerous in the event Emilia got to him. Ugh, I don’t want him too leave. He’s too much of a valuable asset to the group. Not to mention, he’s hilarious. 

I love soft Scarlemagne. I have a feeling that he still has that family bond with the Oaks. 

16. Kipo feels like she has no choice now but to give in to Emilia’s demands but before they could leave, Scarlemagne and Song stop them because Song has a message she wants to give to Kipo through Scarlemagne. She basically wants Kipo to know that she shouldn’t let Emilia use her feelings against her and instead, she should dish it back to Emilia. Scarlemagne further explains that she should let Emilia think she won this round so that she would put her guard down. Great thinking!

17. We fast forward to Kipo barging into Emilia’s hideout without hesitation. Emilia shoots a cure dart and it apparently gets her but she probably didn’t. I predict Kipo has some protective covering for her chest. Emilia goes back on her deal and now wants to take all of them back to her ship. And she wants Kipo to tell the rest of the humans that she didn’t want to be a mute anymore. 

18. It turns out that she’s just distracting her so that Lio and Yumyan could go forward with their rescue plan with Lio stealing Emilia’s second and only other dart left and Yumyan stopping Greta from triggering the nectar bomb. And as predicted, Kipo had that piece of wood Scarlemagne used to write on to protect her. And the battle begins with Yumyan taking on Greta and Kipo taking on Emilia.

19. But why are they struggling against the humans? Kipo should’ve transformed into her full Mega Jaguar form. Because of that, both Emilia and Greta manage to best them and escape. What the!? This fight should’ve been one-sided with the odds favoring the mutes. 

20. And look what happened! OMG! I think Yumyan got hit by the dart that was meant for Kipo. Again, why was Kipo so slow at avoiding those darts all of a sudden?! Ughh, she’s so frustrating. Technically, Wolf made the dart go to Yumyan but this wouldn’t happen if Kipo had reacted faster. Kipo and the rest think that they escaped without any harm...we’ll see about that...

21. Yeap, my fears came true because Yumyan did get hit by the cure dart and he has turned into regular cat. Nooooo!!!! And it’s kinda low key Kipo’s fault. She went through like 10 test runs, so she should’ve learned to avoid them but no, she didn’t! *sniffs. Kipo better find a way to turn him back into a mute pronto. And I’m pretty sure Lio would be able to help. Damn...and the episode has to end with his last words being “Yumyan owns you...meow”...CRIESSSS

22. Well, that’s the end of my review of episode 4. Stay tuned tomorrow for my review of episode 5. Thanks for reading everybody!

[concealeddarkness13]

WHG 15 Post-Games Imposter Syndrome Part 30

This is the last one before the party! Tagging: @ratracechronicler, @maple-writes, @pen-of-roses (also thanks for Conor!), and @thoughts-of-nora!

With the blood in my carpet, I was able to create a few crystal knives just in case I needed them, but I would only use them in an emergency. So, I kept one on me very inconspicuously.

A couple days after I saw Shine and Volt, some Peacekeepers knocked on my door. They didn’t tell me what was going on; they just grabbed me and pushed me along. Brilliant. Was it some other brilliant idea of Aurora’s?

Nope. It was Conor’s. He was standing in the middle of the room, wearing just a buttoned shirt, instead of a full suit, and he had rolled his sleeves up. There was an Avox over to the side, standing by a radio. What the hell was this?

I smirked over at him as the Peacekeepers pushed me into the room and slammed the door behind them. I crossed my arms. “What’s this? You trying to woo me now?”

“You’ve only just now figured that out? We’ve only been a couple for how many days now?” He pretended to look wounded as he walked closer to me, and his eyes sharpened when he got closer.

I laughed. “That means my acting has been that good. I had no idea.”

He actually looked serious. “If I was to ask if you were physically alright, what are the chances of you giving me an honest answer?”

Aw. Was that a bit of concern I saw? I held up my hands so he could see the scar on my right hand even more clearly. “100% truth, I’m technically physically alright. You don’t have to worry about me fainting on you.” I winked at him. He really thought I was going to admit weakness in front of him? He had already exploited my weakness for my friends once.

“Alas, and here I was hoping we would get the full cliché of the romance story. Now I’ll never cross it off the list.” Sorry for disappointing him. “But if ever there was a time for Ally cats presence…nevertheless, I suppose the dress will have to be a little different than the first plan. Still I do hope you will like it.” Ooh. What was this? I hadn’t heard hints of these plans. “But as for why we’re here, apparently the Capitol is afraid that throwing their newest gem into a party for the first time might embarrass them more if she doesn’t know how to dance. Though, I suppose we can’t give them too much credit for worrying about how they’ll be viewed through you all things considered.” A dark look passed over his face before he hid it with a smirk.

Huh. He seemed to be so concerned about me getting hurt. I wouldn’t have expected that of him. I put my hand over my chest, faking pain. “How rude to assume I can’t dance. And 100% true. So, I’m assuming that means you know how to?”

“Why of course! Some of the best dramas unfold on the dance floors of parties, loves, deals, battles of their own sorts, break ups, and renouncements…so much easier to see it all the closer you are. Or to spread the right rumor, secret, story, and what-have-you when the guards of those around you are down from music and dance.” Good to know. I really should pay more attention to parties then. “And,” he added as an afterthought. “I have told you I like the finer things of life.”

Ugh. But dancing was so annoying. I fake pouted. “You can have the finer things in life without learning how to dance. Look at me…well, at least before all this shit happened.”

He raised an eyebrow. “A point I will not contest, though I admit, some of them are to be found in it. Lucky for you I have had enough practice that I doubt many would notice your mistakes when the time comes, but I confess, I am unsure how we will fool the ever watchful,” he nodded at the Avox and a camera, “eyes, that we did indeed do as they asked. Or how we would otherwise spend this time.”

I huffed, but he had a point. Damn it. I held out my hand and smiled my best smile. “Then shall we begin?”

“Let’s.” He bowed and kissed my hand before guiding me to the middle of the room.

I was going to look like a damn fool. I didn’t know anything about dancing. The Avox turned on the music. He helped me position my hands, and I hid my nervousness with sarcasm. “My, but I feel under-dressed for this occasion. I hope you can stand a partner who doesn’t know the dress code.”

He started a complicated dance, moving with no warning, and I already stumbled. Shit. I wasn’t prepared for this. “And here I hoped I was dressed down for you, should I have worn less? Perhaps undo a few buttons as well? You can hardly be blamed when uninformed.”

Shit, I couldn’t even respond right away. I looked down as he moved me in the dance. I tried to keep up, but I kept stepping on his feet or stumbling. I looked ridiculous. “I don’t know how you could wear less and still be appropriate. But a more casual shirt would have made me feel less like I missed a memo.” Less sarcasm now.

“Alas, my current wardrobe is rather lacking in what you would call casual, unless of course you mean in the manner of the Capitol? If not, then this is as dressed down as I can appropriately get while in my current position.”

Huh. That probably wasn’t something I should try to imagine, or I’d start flushing. But I made a face just thinking about having to wear fancy clothes all the time. “Then I’m even more grateful they let me wear whatever I want when they’re not parading me around on tv. Sucks to be you.”

He laughed. “Indeed, though I will admit to revealing a bit in playing these roles. Putting a mask on and allowing the world to see something they wish so you can do as you please? I do enjoy these games.”

I had already seen how much of an expert he was in playing those games. It would be better if I learned more about that, if I ever thought to have another scheme. As I was thinking, he spun me, and I almost tripped over my feet. I frowned. “Any tips for doing that? I’m still working on it myself.”

“When spinning, the best option is to pick something stable to look at so you will not become dizzy, only turning away when you can physically no longer look at it. I’d say trust me, but well,” he spread his arm and raised an eyebrow.

Yeah, he couldn’t be trusted. Especially because he hadn’t answered my question. I snorted. “The dancing tips are much appreciated, but you know that’s not what I meant.”

“It’s much the same really. Pick a point that you know is stable about your mask, even if it’s something as small as how you stand or what you wear. Imagine how that fits the part you want to play, as you’re already in it, go from there and believe that it’s a part of you. But only a part. Want to seem confident? Straighten your back, and keep conscious of how it is, and you’ve already done one step of the persona. Then just add more.”

I bowed my head a little, and then promptly tripped. “That’s solid advice. I honestly didn’t expect that from you.”

“I’m wounded.” In a deadpan voice. “But of course, it’s more fun to play the game with someone else who knows.”

“But of course,” I echoed. As we danced, I was actually able to keep my balance. So, I was getting better. “Tell me about your methods. So that I can appreciate your effort that much more.” Maybe I could figure out more about his motives.

“Hmm, some of my methods, I’ll admit, are natural for me, and I have had years of practice. Of building up my personas and masks for everyone else, they are naturally a part of me at this point. I confess, I don’t know what other methods you’re referring to.”

I sighed. He was going to make me say it, wasn’t he? But at least I could get a few more tips out of this. “Fine, I’ll admit. Your charm, your wit, how you can destroy someone with just a few words, how you’re always one step ahead of everyone else.” I made my voice exaggeratedly sarcastic. “You can’t tell me all of that is just a fake persona.”

He laughed. “Destroying someone with a few words is probably the easiest to explain, but it requires having knowledge ahead of time or being able to read them and their tells on the fly. Actually, a rather cheap trick learned from pseudo-psychics about how to cold read a person based off subtle tells they give to a conversation. If you mention this, does their breath hitch or eyes go wide? Or did they seem dismissive of it? Or again, have prior knowledge of their weak points based off their history. Which I suppose aids in the being a step ahead, but having ready access to knowledge and plenty of contacts helps. As well as the years of seeing the patterns people tend to play out. As for charm and wit,” he dipped me, and I lost my footing, and I flailed a little before I realized he was keeping me from falling, “well, at one time they were ‘a fake persona’ for me, learned through pretending to be sharpest in the room, acting like those that were, watching and picking things up to add to my masks. But as I also said, they became a part of me from those years because I let them and wanted them to the point they became as natural as breathing. Satisfied my little thief?”

He pulled me back up, but I still stuttered before I could speak clearly. And I frowned. “Wait, since you answered those questions, do I owe you more kisses? Not complaining or anything, just making sure I know everything I’m getting into.”

“I was not going to charge you for those no, but if you insist, you do still owe me.”

I hated how I actually felt a little disappointed about that, but I didn’t have much time to think about that. He dipped me again, and I almost lost my footing, but he kept me from falling even as he leaned down closer so that our faces were inches from each other. Shit, and I was starting to flush. I was being so stupid. He was dangerous.

He kissed me and as I was getting lost in the intensity of it all, he let me fall and broke contact so that he could lean over me with a smirk before crushing his lips to mine. His hands wandered to my scars on my collarbone and my hand, and he traced them, and his kiss became more intense. He clasped my right hand tight before letting it go and slipping his hand under my shirt. And that was where he found the scar on my lower back and stomach. His hand lingered there, tracing over the scar tissue, and he held me tighter and tighter, and I couldn’t breathe…

He broke away, and when I looked up at him as I gasped for breath, his eyes were dark again. “Are you well enough to continue, little thief?”

I was still gasping for breath, but I wouldn’t admit any weakness. Anyway, I was fine. I was just still in pain from the healing. “To continue what? Don’t go and start talking all vague. I’ll assume something you aren’t meaning.” I smirked.

His gaze hardened a little, and he frowned as he pulled me back upright. “Dancing of course. Though,” he smirked, “I am curious as to what else you could have assumed?”

I cocked my head. Had he really not realized his vague wording? “Well, you did say ‘continue’ after you just stopped kissing me. So, I wouldn’t be out of line to believe you were talking about kissing me more.”

“And tell me, is that what you want?” He leaned close to me as he positioned my hands again.

I flushed a little. He was dangerous. I shouldn’t get closer to him. But also, a stupid side of my brain wanted me to close the distance. Shit. I wasn’t going to admit that. “You’ve already expressed doubt that I’d tell you the truth in other matters. So, why do you think I would now?”

“And yet I’m the liar in our little game.” He started the dance, and it was a lot simpler than the last one. “I am allowed the basic emotion of hope, am I not? Why exactly must these things be such a terrible secret that you have to keep it to yourself? But nevertheless, I will not press. After all, I do keep far too many things close to my chest so to speak, that I am not to be trusted by anyone. Perhaps I should instead be commending you for being one of the few.”

One of the few what? I couldn’t even tell what he meant. “Hmm. Now that’s just confusing on purpose. And I didn’t say I wouldn’t tell the truth, so insinuating that I should be called the liar is just assuming. Like you assumed I wouldn’t tell the truth before. And then I told the truth.” Talking about when he asked if I was physically alright.

“You told the truth in the same manner that I tell the truth, so either, we’re both liars, or we’re both honest people. And should I not be judging based off of past actions or do we constantly forget the past to blindly hope the future is brighter because we so wish it?” As he led me in the dance, he was studying my face.

Of course, my mind flashed to how he had actually told me the truth about Reine and the others. They were safe. They hadn’t been captured by the Capitol. But I’d never admit that. So, I went for a subtle admission. I smirked a little. “A little bit of both, I suppose, especially when new information about the person in question comes to light.”

“Ah, but new information simply means you yourself were wrong about their past, not that they themselves have changed. But I do concede the wisdom of that, given the difficulty one might find in reframing their early bias.”

Good time to press. “So…in the spirit of learning new information and reframing my early bias, what are your motives for fucking with me? This can’t help you with the three motives you stated in the past. Unless you were lying about those.”

“To which three do you refer? I have mentioned my interest and curiosity haven’t I? Or perhaps it was the need for entertainment in a boringly long life? And I informed Star that I’d help her get as many tributes out of the Games of the Capitol as possible. When she failed to get you, and your other friends out, that meant that I was still to help her. Or are you by chance hoping to uncover the dastardly ulterior motives that I’ve yet to reveal that paint me as the true villain in this story?” He spun me, but I actually didn’t trip this time. “The part where I’m using all this as a distraction for the Capitol and other interested groups so I can obtain something that’s been kept from me?”

With how much he made it sound that his villain plan was farfetched, I wouldn’t be surprised if it was real. And I totally didn’t believe that he was just doing this to help Reine get the tributes out. Was he lying, or only telling partial truths? “The three whose answers I’m still paying off. But if there aren’t ulterior motives, why the hell did you choose me?”

“I never said there wasn’t an ulterior motive, but the reason I chose you was simply interest, dear little thief. I’m not sure whether it would comfort you to think that it was purely by chance of fate that our paths crossed in time for you to steal my gloves and draw my attention enough to be intrigued about what the Shades had to say about you instead of say another. Avery or Hugo, or any of the others perhaps could have worked just as well for the purposes, but I’m not sure if she would have endeared herself to the Capitol as easily to be a big enough star.”

Oh boy. I spoke with heavy sarcasm. “Yeah, that makes me feel loads better, hearing that it was just chance that a manipulative, crafty jerk decided to interfere with me. Seriously, the only thing going for you right now is how easy you are on the eyes.” And the information he was giving away that was hopefully at least partially true.

“Not even my honesty, I’m shocked. After all, I’ve always been rather up front about who I am.” He finished the dance, letting go of me and bowing. “But I dare say, that was a little too close to a compliment.”

I smirked and gave him a small curtsey. “Well, maybe you’re too close to deserving that one. But only that one.”

“I’ve survived off of less and have gotten this far. Feel like you understand that one? You didn’t step on my feet accidentally once.”

Maybe I should have. “It makes sense. I should be fine with that one.” So, why did he even show off the complicated one first? “You just made me dance the first one because it was so complicated and I’d stumble and look foolish, didn’t you?”

“Stumbling yes, because it would make the others seem far easier to perform.” Sure. “Looking foolish was not the plan, though I was curious what would happen if you were truly off balance for once, if you’d let anything slip. I cannot say if I’m disappointed or pleased by how you adapt so easily.”

Ha. I either disappointed him or pleased him. I smirked. “I’m just annoying like that, aren’t I, hun?”

He raised an eyebrow, also smirking. “Intriguing is the word I would have used. But if you’d feel better labeling yourself as such, yes, I do find the puzzles I’ve yet to solve annoying as you say.”

I felt even more accomplished. I’d actually annoyed him! Best day ever. I laughed. “What puzzles? Me, I’m an open book.” I spread my arms out with a little bow.

He mimicked me with a flourish. “As am I if you look close enough, and yet we seem incapable of fully understanding the other. Or do you believe to have figured me completely out already and I’m the one left behind?”

“This time I’m being 100% honest when I say: hell no. But I guess that’s part of the fun.”

“Exactly, on that we can agree.”

Well, this had been fun. But time to go. Didn’t want to overstay my welcome. I took his hand and kissed the top of it. “Until next time, Bystander.” And I walked off before he could get the last word.

I paused by the Avox, glanced at the camera, and discreetly handed her one of the crystal knives I had kept on me. I leaned in close and whispered in her ear. “Use this to escape, if you can. And take as many as you can. It’s very sharp.” She gasped and nodded, and I left. Hopefully, I had helped her.

[ripley95]

Echoes of Old Embers

Chapter 14

*Last Chapter*

Pairing: F!Shepard/Kaidan Alenko

Rating: T

Chapter length: 2.8K

Story Synopsis:

After surviving the war, one of Shepard’s biggest regrets was rejecting Kaidan at Apollo’s. Fate has a way of bringing Jane and Kaidan back into each other’s lives. A misunderstanding with his family makes Kaidan and Shepard relive old history and question where they stand.

Link to Chapter 1 on AO3

Chapter Synopsis:

The conclusion.

Read to Chapter 14 on AO3

Tumblr Links:

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 14

Read the chapter here below the cut:

Shepard began to open her eyes slowly. She squinted them thanks to the light, grateful that it was dim at least. It took a moment for her thoughts to catch up to her surroundings. She and Kaidan were still in the cellar.

Not only that, but she found herself cuddled tightly up against him, her head on his shoulder and hand on his chest. One of her legs was tucked between his. She savoured his warmth just as she always had when they were together and she couldn’t contain the smile that formed on her face.

She’d been such a fool to deny them both this happiness for so long. She could easily get angry at herself for the thought of it. She likely would too. She figured she’d probably hold regret over this for the rest of her life. Kaidan deserved his own say in the matter during the war. She should have trusted his intentions behind wanting to get back together at the time. The best she could do was take Kaidan’s words to heart now. Not to dwell in what she couldn’t change from the past, but she’d learn from it for the future. She wouldn’t be letting time slip by them like that again. She never wanted to let this feeling go. As bittersweet as it was to think of what she’d missed out on, she couldn’t help the elation she felt from finally getting to be with him again. That waking up like this wasn’t an accident like it was in the cabin. That she could expect many mornings like this in the future.

Instead of withdrawing from him like she had when they were cuddled together on the couch, she nuzzled in closer, resting her head more tightly against his chest and got comfortable. Even on the hard floor, she could have easily stayed like this forever. It felt like home - he felt like home. That wasn’t an easy feeling for her to come by.

Her movement must have woken him up. He started stirring beneath her. She heard him take in a deep breath. She looked up at him with a smile still on her face. He finally looked at her, his own expression immediately matching hers. It was the kind of smile that reached his eyes. The very same kind that his mother had mentioned before. Ada was right, the eyes really didn’t lie. She could see the warmth in them as they softened when he saw her. It wasn’t forced. Just happy. Exactly how she felt and she hoped he could see the same.

He brushed the back of his fingers across her cheek to move the hair out of her eyes and studied her in a way that he had to convince himself that this was real. He finally looked back to her then before he placed his hand on top of hers that was still resting on his chest.

“I’m so happy you’re here,” he said, still beaming.

“Well, we are locked in. Not like I had anywhere else to go,” she said with a teasing grin now, unable to help herself.

It deepened his own smile, appreciating the humour as he nodded.

Her own smile tamed away from the humour, turning more soft and genuine. “But I’m glad you’re here, too,” she said with sincerity, cupping his jawline and running her thumb over his stubble.

Neither of them even cared that they could be locked in here for an indeterminate amount of time. They held each other closer, Jane nuzzled back into him again as they got comfortable. Kaidan looked at the ceiling as he pulled her closer to him with the arm that was wrapped around her. She knew his smile was still reaching his eyes, even if She couldn’t see it anymore.

“Guess you don’t have to worry about accommodation when we get back to Vancouver now, either. You can come back to my assigned housing with me.”

Shit. That brought up another issue that they’d need to deal with.

“What about the regs?” she asked, suddenly sounding less confident.

Kaidan took a moment to think about that before he responded. “We’re in different jurisdictions now. There’s plenty of relationships that have worked in the Alliance before us, and we won’t be the last. If it becomes an issue, one or both of us can focus more on being a Spectre,” he said. He rubbed his thumb over her hand comfortingly, not sounding worried. “We go and declare our relationship first thing when we get back. They’ll make sure we’re not assigned together anymore.”

“You don’t think we’ll get in trouble?”

“What’s there to get in trouble for? Our SR-1 fraternization is long behind us. We didn’t tell them about it when we were reprimanded for stealing the Normandy, no need for them to know about it now of all times. There really wasn’t anything going on between us during the war. You haven’t even technically been reassigned yet. Any fraternization happening now isn’t punishable, especially since we're not even assigned to the same outfit.”

Shepard nodded at that reluctantly, not feeling quite as confident over the matter.

“I think if there’s one thing I’ve learned throughout this whole mess, is that I don’t want to go on without you in my life anymore. Everything feels right when I’m with you. No matter what happens, we’ll figure it out. Together,” he added at the end for emphasis.

That did make her smile. She felt the same way and the ‘together’ part was key. It felt good to be on the same page about this now, working toward a common goal. “Together,” she agreed. No matter what happened or what uncertainty they would face, it felt brighter no longer facing it alone.

They sat there comfortably, figuring they could have a leisurely start to the morning, knowing they didn’t even have the option to leave. Suddenly, Shepard could hear Kaidan breathing in sharply.

“Do you smell that?” he asked, prompting her to start testing the air.

“Is that bacon?” she asked, looking towards him questioningly.

“Sure smells like it,” he said, moving up to rest on his elbows, looking towards the stairs. The smell was getting more potent. “Someone must be in the kitchen,” he said, looking back towards her.

She followed suit and sat up, herself. “Well, unless we want to be locked in here forever, I guess we should take a look.”

“I don’t know,” he said with a grin. “I was beginning to think it wasn’t the worst thing in the world to be trapped down here.”

“Couldn’t agree more,” she said as she smiled at him softly. As awful as it was that they were locked in overnight, she was thankful for it now with this being the result.

They both stood up, straightening out their hair and arranged their clothes in a presentable way, even if it was much more wrinkled and worse for wear. Kaidan rolled up the sleeping bag and grabbed his jacket. Shepard would no longer need it, going up to the house where the temperatures were much more comfortable.

They made their way over to the staircase, noticing that the door was already ajar. They glanced at each other questioningly, surprised that they hadn’t heard it open. They slowly made their way up the stairs and saw Ada cooking at the stove.

“Ah, there you two are. Perfect timing. I’m almost finished making breakfast,” she said as she began plating some of the food that was done. “Why don’t you have a seat,” she said, pointing towards the raised counter top where there were already two place settings with orange juice and coffee waiting for them.

They glanced at each other curiously as they made their way around and sat down. Shepard took a sip of her coffee. As strange as this whole situation was, she wasn’t one to deny a cup that was fresh and waiting for her.

The sliding door to the kitchen opened, causing Shepard and Kaidan to look behind them. Maisie walked in, still in her pyjamas. She stopped dead in her tracks as she eyed the both of them, paying special attention to their attire.

“Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in.”

Kaidan glared at her. “What are you even doing up this early, Maisie?” he asked as he took a sip of his own coffee.

She laughed at that. “What do you mean, up this early? I haven’t even gone to bed yet. I figured I’d pass out after breakfast.”

“That makes more sense,” Kaidan grumbled out with a laugh.

“What about you? I noticed you guys snuck off somewhere last night. Didn’t even have enough time to change your clothes this morning, eh?” she said in a cocky tone, eyeing them suspiciously. 

“They got locked in the cellar last night. I didn’t even put two and two together until I saw Kaidan’s bedroom door wide open this morning,” Ada chimed in, still focusing on the breakfasts she was making.

“Uh-huh,” Maisie said, leaning against the countertop, still eyeing them like she knew better.

Jane and Kaidan shared another glance, not saying a word, but unable to hide their smiles at the thought of it.

Maisie shook her head, her own grin forming on her face as though she caught them red-handed. “Not in a relationship, MY ASS!”

“That’s enough, Maisie,” Ada said in an authoritative tone. Maisie made a face implying that she was confident in her assessment, but would shut up nonetheless, not wanting another scolding from her mother. Ada had finished preparing two other plates of food. “Now, why don’t we eat our breakfast in the living room and let these two have a quiet breakfast after the night they had,” Ada said, handing Maisie a plate.

“Ugh. Fine,” she said reluctantly as she took the plate and left towards the living room.

“Thanks, mom,” Kaidan said as he dug into his food.

“Of course, dear,” she replied as she went to grab her own plate and coffee. “I have to admit something now, or I’m afraid my conscience will never let me live it down,” she said in more of a whispered tone as she faced them.

Kaidan and Shepard both put their forks down and listened to her intently.

“Let me start off by saying, I really didn’t mean for you to get locked in the cellar and what I just said about me not putting two and two together that you were still down there until this morning was true,” she said, acting a little flustered.

“Mom?” Kaidan questioned.

“There was no bottle of wine,” she almost blurted out.

Shepard smiled, already assuming as much.

“I could just tell that you both needed to talk about whatever was going on between the two of you and it didn’t seem like either of you was going to do it of your own volition. You clearly needed some time alone together no matter what the outcome was going to be, so I may have pushed you both towards the cellar as a plausible excuse to get away from everything. I really didn’t mean for you to be locked in,” she said, looking very apologetic.

Kaidan let out a sigh before he looked at Shepard who just looked amused by the whole situation.

“Don’t worry about it, mom,” he said with a forgiving smile. “But maybe let me pay for an upgrade on that door? Something attached to the omni-tools?”

Ada rolled her eyes, but nodded in acceptance. “I don’t think I could say no after the night you just spent down there. I hope there’s no hard feelings, Jane.”

“We’re good,” she said with her own smile. “I probably shouldn’t be condoning this kind of thing, but I think you’re right. It’s exactly what we needed,” she said, putting her hand on Kaidan’s knee as she looked at him genuinely.

“Don’t worry. With how bad I feel, I don’t think I’ll be doing anything like that again any time soon, but I’m glad for the outcome at least. I think I’ve talked your ears off enough now though. I’ll leave you two be so you can enjoy a nice, quiet breakfast together.”

Kaidan gave her an appreciative nod. He and Shepard watched her as she left the kitchen before they turned back to face each other.

Kaidan huffed out a small laugh. “I’m not even mad about it, honestly.”

Shepard’s smile softened. It was a bit meddlesome, she had to admit, but she wasn’t exactly mad about it either. Ada was well-intentioned enough.

“How could I be mad about it either if it led me back to you?” she said as she leaned towards him and they shared a gentle kiss.

“I KNEW IT!” They both heard, startling them from their kiss. They turned to the door quickly in shock to see Maisie standing there.

“Ugh,” Kaidan grumbled out. “What are you doing back here already?” he asked, rubbing his forehead.

“Forgot my orange juice,” she said, pointing to the counter in front of them.

“How convenient,” he said as he sat up a little more dignified.

“There’s no going back now after what I just saw, you know,” Maisie said, grinning from ear to ear as she walked over to them. She brought them both into an awkward hug. “I don’t know why you guys kept trying to deny it so long. Isn’t it easier to live freely with that information out in the open?”

“Maisie!” they all heard Ada shout from the other room, already knowing that she was causing a ruckus.

Maisie squeezed them a little tighter. “I’m just happy for you guys, you know that, right?” she said more sincerely.

“I know,” Kaidan admitted.

“Good,” she said as she lowered her head down to their level. “I hope you also know that I’m never going to let you live this down,” she said, her evil grin returning.

Kaidan rolled his eyes and Shepard laughed, deciding to appreciate the humour in the situation.

“Now, why don’t you two enjoy your breakfast,” she said as she patted them both on the back roughly. “I’ll let you two have some privacy.”

They both watched her as she took her orange juice and left. Shepard turned to Kaidan then. He had a bit of a grumpy look on his face, though she was still entertained by the whole idea more than anything.

“I’m glad you find it funny, at least.”

“She was going to find out eventually,” Shepard said, smiling at him kindly, trying to sympathise even if she didn’t feel that badly about it.

Kaidan took in a deep breath and turned towards his plate and got a fork full of eggs. “You have a good point. I just hate it when she has a one-up on me,” he said as he shook his head, finally laughing at the situation himself. “This one was worth it, though,” he said, smiling at her.

“Agreed,” she said as she started her own breakfast. As she took a sip of the fancy guest coffee that she remembered from the other morning, it brought her back to her conversation with Raiya. The same one where she admitted her true feelings. At the time, Kaidan had never felt so far out of her reach. But now here she was, only two days later and circumstances couldn’t have been more different. She was finally happy. Suddenly, she felt Kaidan’s hand placed over hers.

“Everything okay?” he asked, sounding concerned.

“Yeah,” she said with a smile. “I was just thinking of the conversation I had with Raiya the other day. I may have told her something,” she started to hint at a little ambiguously. She figured if she could admit it to Raiya, she could admit it to Kaidan.

“Oh yeah? What did you tell her?” he asked curiously.

“I told her that I’m in love with you.”

He smiled at that sadly. Like he realised how much she’d been hurting this whole time, too. “I’m in love with you, too. I always was,” he said, pulling her in for another gentle kiss now.

They parted ever so slightly. “Aren’t you afraid of someone else from your family catching us now?”

“No,” he said, his hand on her thigh now as he looked at her genuinely. “I’m in this for the long haul, Jane. Let them find out and hold it above our heads for the rest of our lives,” he said with one of the biggest smiles she’d ever seen.

She couldn’t help but match his expression, the implication of his words deeper than she’d expected. ‘For the rest of our lives.’

“I like the sound of that.”

[wolftraps]

Sign over your soul

Many people (including @sidewalk-and-chalkin most recently) asked about Cass and her meeting with Martin about keeping her job and the whole reveal. Technically this doesn’t include the full reveal, but I already gave you a powerpoint for that. So here. Have Cass and Martin trying to one-up each other while Jon continues being a disaster.

--

Cass and Martin have never been friends. Which is odd because it’s not like they haven’t known each other, and they’re both generally friendly people. They’ve even been friends with a lot of the same people. And yet, even after years of working in the same place and talking to the same people, they still know each other almost solely by reputation. Reputation which, prior to Martin joining the Archives, had been good. Now… well, now it’s hard to say. The doors are locked, as usual, when Cass arrives for her pseudo-interview, but that’s been the case for months and it hasn’t mattered so far. And as usual, Patrząc meets her out front and leads her around to a side door, propped open with a tape recorder, that she locks back up behind her. As always. “And how are you today, beautiful?” Cass asks. Patrząc meows back, pleased. “That’s great. So, what are the odds I’m about to lose my job?” Another meow; Cass laughs. “I know better than to bet against myself. Do you even have any money?” Patrząc ignores her, just leads her through the familiar building to a room on the ground floor that Cass knows has been turned into Martin’s new office. There they stop. “Right.” Cass takes a deep breath. “Wish me luck.”

“Mrrow,” Patrząc says. “It doesn’t matter if I need it or not. It’s polite.” The cat just stares. “Oh hush.” With another breath, Cass knocks, intending to wait, but as soon as she does, Patrząc huffs and rubs up against the door, which swings open with only a soft click. She meows at Martin as she leads Cass in and then stalks right back out as the door closes behind her. “That cat has no sense of decorum,” Cass says fondly, staring after her. “She’s Jon’s cat,” Martin responds, just as fond, “I’ve given up. Anyway. Sit, please. You want any tea?” “Sure. Just a—” “Small spoonful of sugar,” Martin finishes, already setting the mug in front of her. It’s made perfectly. “So, first off, thank you for all the work you’ve been doing. It’s really been a relief to not have all that to worry about.” “No idea what you’re talking about,” Cass lies. “Right. So you don’t want this bonus I was going to give you.” “Well it’s not like you or Sims were going to maintain the network. Also you can blame the cat for letting me in.” “Yeah, I know. I’ve always known. If it was a problem we would’ve talked way before now.” “Right. Good… Should I bother asking how? I know you’re not watching the security footage.” She’d checked. No one had accessed any of it but her since they closed the doors. “You… can. First I’d like to go over some things myself. And, whenever he can be bothered to join us, Jon has some questions too.” “O- oh.” Cass doesn’t actually have anything to hide— not really. She still gets a shiver down her spine, though, and takes a sip of perfect tea to cover it. “Sure.” “Cool. Alright. Where—” Martin flips through the papers on his desk, fumbling a bit. It makes him look like the same nice, approachable man he’d been before. Something about it feels deliberate, though. Cass forces herself into a relaxed posture to match. Finally, Martin finds what he was ‘looking’ for, two sheets down in the stack right in front of him. “Ah! Here we go. So you’ve been working here for six years, right? Two promotions in that time. Do you like working here? I guess that’s a good place to start.” “I mean, yeah. It’s not exactly easy work. IT in a place like this—” “Not exactly easy to do any job in a place like this,” Martin mutters. “Well, yeah, but you never had to explain to Elias that it didn’t matter how high- or low- tech we went, security cameras wouldn’t work in the Archives.” “You didn’t have to hide in your flat for a full day because supernatural worms trapped you there.” “You didn’t have to create an entirely new encryption program to prevent data corruption in all Elias’s emails.” “You didn’t have to try to convince Tim not to murder Jon.” “You didn’t have to write a virus to keep Tim from stalking Sims even more.” “Did you really?” “Yeah.” “Oh… thanks.” Cass waves him off. “Not like it worked.” “Still… You didn’t get chased through secret tunnels and stumble across your old boss’s corpse.” “Right, about that! Who did kill Gertrude? Really?” “Elias.” “Yes! Called it…” She considers for a second. “You didn’t have to crawl through the walls to replace the cables the worms ate through. You think the ECDC cleared out all their gross, wriggly little corpses? They didn’t.” Martin sets down his tea, looking appropriately disgusted. “Oh, ugh. Hmm… You didn’t have to run from a creature that eats people and steals their identities.” “You didn’t have your friend replaced and have to explain to their best friend what happened without fully understanding it yourself.” “I… kind of did, actually.”

Cass pauses, something suddenly becoming clear. “Oh… oh. I’m… surprised Tim was as controlled as he was, then.” “Yeah. He had… other things to distract him. It’s not exactly the same. Sasha’s still around, sort of. She’s just—” Not something he really wants to talk about, clearly. “Right. You’ve never had to spend hours trying to figure out exactly how Sasha fucked up your system after she changed things without warning.” “I have, though,” Martin sighs, clearly exasperated. “The number of forms I’ve had to redo. It’s not… totally her fault. She doesn’t mean to do it; it’s more like a reflex.” “Oh no. Michael Lanson’s entire existence in our system was not some reflex. She did that intentionally, and she made it just right enough that I probably wouldn’t have noticed for months if Hannah hadn’t said something, and just wrong enough I had to redo the whole thing from scratch or it would’ve drove me insane.” “Oh. That. Yeah. She was… trying to do us a favor, sort of? Anyway, you never had to convince Daisy Tonner that you had no clue where Jon might be while he was on the run.” “Sure I did. Not as hard as you did, sure, but I still had to lie to her.” “Wait— You knew where Jon was?” “I mean, not at first. But Melanie King comes in talking about the dead guy being Jurgen Leitner and leaving with boxes from the Archives? That she’s just allowed to carry out? After Sims utterly destroyed Diana in her defense?” “Wait, Jon did what?”

Cass sits bolt upright, potential glee already taking hold. “You don’t know about that? I swear the archives were CCed.” “I have no idea what you’re talking about.” “Oh my god. Okay. Hold on,” Cass says, already scrolling through the saved emails on her phone. It takes less than a minute to find and send the right one. “You never wondered why Diana hates Sims so much?” “I mean. A lot of people hate Jon, and I doubt Diana could kill him, so I wasn’t that worried that… Oh my god, Jon. How did I miss this? I… I think I might need to frame this… Wait, if you thought he was with Melanie, why didn’t you say anything to Daisy?” Cass pauses for a second, but, well, given how freaky the Archivist himself is, this probably won’t phase Martin too much. “I didn’t just think. I traced her mobile to place her at Georgie Barker’s and then hacked CCTV feeds until I caught Sims.” “You…” Martin sighs and slumps a bit. “Of course you did. I don’t know why I… That still doesn’t explain why you didn’t tell Daisy.” Cass shrugs and takes another sip of tea. “Wasn’t my business. Also, that would’ve been tampering and all the bets I’d taken would be void. Anyway. You never had to prove to Daisy Tonner that you’d already destroyed any and all evidence that might implicate Jonathan Sims in any murder, especially that of Peter Lukas, after she joined the Institute.” “You never had to get Jon to talk about his feelings.” “True, but you never had to explain to Elias both what keyloggers are and why we shouldn’t use them.” “Key— Wait, are you trying to tell me there aren’t keyloggers on every computer here?” “Oh, no, there absolutely are. But all collected data is immediately encrypted with a specially created algorithm where the key changes at short, irregular intervals and requires both knowledge-based and biological-based authentication just to generate a decryption key for use. Also our storage space is limited, so most of it can only be kept for a week at most. He probably still knew everything everyone ever typed, but any actual evidence was only ever accessible by me.” It takes Martin a moment to process this. Cass takes another sip of tea. “How did you get away with that?” “Assured him Gertrude would never be able to access any of it. And then every time he came around for any reason I started thinking about all the upgrades I wanted to ask for.” He looks a little shell-shocked. “I… honestly can’t tell how much you know about everything that’s been going on around here.” “Not as much as us, but more than most everyone else, and enough she likely won’t change her mind about staying,” Jonathan Sims says, striding in looking harried with a very self-satisfied cat draped across his shoulders. “I… apologize for my tardiness, Martin, Josie.” Cass freezes. “Jos—” Martin starts to ask. “Ahh,” Sims says, almost sheepishly. “I- I’m sorry. I didn’t—” “It’s fine,” Cass says stiffly. “I figured you probably knew. It’s— not actually that big a deal.” “Still. I shouldn’t— I didn’t mean to—” Well, this is awkward. “Martin said you had some questions,” she cuts him off. “Y-yes. I— don’t think that will be necessary.” “Wait- really?” Martin asks incredulously. “You don’t have any questions? You?” “I—” Cass knows many things about most of the people who have worked in the Institute over the past six years, but there’s only so much you can ever actually know about a person from a distance. She’s good at filling in the blanks, but it still somehow surprises her to find that the dreaded Archivist is almost painfully awkward. He looks at her with something like apprehension. “Go ahead,” she tells him and goes to take another sip, only to find her cup empty. Damn. “Miss Walters has a grand total of one close friend outside the Institute, and that only because Hannah Kenway has now left our employ. Her only remaining family is a grandfather who lives in a small town near Barcelona and hasn’t taken any of her calls in the past five years, though she still always tries on Christmas and her mother’s birthday. She has had an interest in the paranormal since… ah.” “Since?” Martin prompts. Cass keeps staring at the empty mug in betrayal. “Since her mother disappeared when she was six, after reading her a children’s book titled “Una Invitada Para el Señor Araña.” “What does— Ohh.” “Guessing you know that one, then,” Cass says. “I— had my own encounter with it,” Sims tells her. “About three years after yours, though it was in English then.” “Yeah. Strange how no one ever believes the kid who says they saw a giant spider eat someone.” “And yet— You aren’t afraid of spiders.” “I am. Sort of. After it happened, I decided I was going to learn everything there was to know about spiders, the supernatural, and Jurgen Letiner. Which eventually brought me here. It’s just… Spiders are fascinating. I have a… healthy respect for them—” “And you’ve always been attracted to dangerous things.” Cass narrows her eyes at him and tries to keep her voice serious when she says, “If you’re about to say the word ‘murderwives,’ I’m gonna have to insist you let me record it.” Sims scowls, something like affront on his face. “I would not.” “I have no idea what you’re talking about, but now I actually kind of want to hear you say that, Jon,” Martin says. Cass wonders again why they aren’t friends already. “I will not!” “I bet Sasha could get you to say it.” “She could not, and you are not going to call her in here just to try,” Sims asserts, but the mischievous smile Martin has doesn’t seem to agree. “Martin.” “I won’t call her in here just to try,” Martin promises, though Cass notes what he doesn’t say and doubts that will be the end of it. Around Sims, Martin nods at her, just slightly, and she knows that she’ll probably get an audio file from him within the week. Sims looks reproachful. Martin looks entirely unrepentant. “Regardless,” Sims decides to move on, “Miss Walters has found herself rather attached to the Institute and likely hasn’t even considered not staying on. Also I suspect, should we not keep her on, our network may refuse to cooperate with her replacement entirely.” “… You mean that literally, don’t you?” Martin sounds so resigned Cass has to laugh. “That’s my baby,” she says proudly. “Right,” he sighs. “So I guess we’ll just go straight to selling your soul to a fear god, then.” She can’t say that’s what she was expecting to hear, especially with someone like Martin in charge. But, she supposes, they don’t actually know each other that well. Anyway, selling your soul to a fear god sounds dangerous, and she’s intrigued. “Alright,” she asks, “is that a bug or a feature?”

[neuxue]

Wheel of Time liveblogging: Towers of Midnight ch 3

I have been waiting for this reunion for literal years. It did not disappoint.

Chapter 3: The Amyrlin’s Anger

Oh, we’re doing this!?

One thing I can guarantee: I am definitely not ready. Childhood friends turned childhood sweethearts turned near-siblings turned uneasy allies turned near-enemies, perhaps turned uneasy allies once more, with prophecy and opposing institutions and the apocalypse hanging over them?

I’m just. In case you haven’t noticed, I have a lot of thoughts about this whole dynamic, and I have been waiting for this… probably since they last saw each other in Lord of Chaos. Before that, even. Since they were set on their separate paths, but with this thread, strained and near at times to breaking but a thread all the same, of some kind of love between them that might, in the end, be enough to do what their predecessors could not, and face the end together.

Also their stories have been running in this fascinating not-quite-parallel for so long but they haven’t interacted in so long that I’m just! Very excited for this reunion and the pain it will no doubt bring!

I should start reading now, shouldn’t I?

Egwene floated in blackness. She was without form, lacking shape or body. The thoughts, imaginings, worries, hopes, and ideas of all the world extended into eternity around her.

The imagery of that last bit catches my attention here because it plays very close to the position Rand holds: stood at the centre, a force, or a being more than a person, touching all the world or – in Egwene’s case – all the world’s dreams. It’s just an interesting one, in amongst all the other parallels and inversions between them.

Though her feelings for Gawyn were still strong, her opinion of him was muddled recently.

Just break up with him already. Please. You’ve already once decided that actually no, I don’t want a storybook romance with the designated hero thank you very much; you can do it again.

The dreams of all the people here – some from her world, some from shadows of it – reminded her why she fought. She must never forget that there was an entire world outside the White Tower’s walls.

This is her anchor, just as Rand has now at last found his. Or, not even an anchor so much as a reason. Something to fight for, something to remember and strive for beyond the fight itself. And again this places her very much at the centre as well, looking at all the people, all the dreams, the entire world. They just each have their own ways of going about it, and their own reasons for doing so.

Time passed as she lay bathed in the light of dreams.

Just quoting this one because it’s pretty.

It’s sad to see Egwene thinking of the Wise Ones in terms of ‘dealing with’ them, but also not really surprising; there’s been a distance between them ever since she took on this role. They hid the events of Dumai’s Wells from her and she chose the Aes Sedai over them and it is, perhaps, one of the harsher aspects of the way she absolutely embraces her role, the good and the bad.

Ugh, fine, dream of Gawyn if you must.

A more simple life. It could not be hers, but she could dream…

Everything shook.

Or not. I’m just imagining this as the Pattern itself interrupting like ‘EGWENE, PLEASE. YOU CAN DO SO MUCH BETTER THAN HIM.’

(Yes, the Pattern speaks in all caps. No I will not be accepting constructive criticism on this point).

This pleasant dream interrupted by an emergency broadcast: thirteen black towers rising and then all but six falling. In case you weren’t keeping track of how many Forsaken were still alive, I suppose.

And then a follow-up as a reminder, I assume, that Mesaana is still in the Tower.

Unless the eagles-and-snake bit is referring to the Black Tower? Still no idea what’s going on there these days; it’s been a while and I’m very, very curious after that ominous line drop in the KoD epilogue.

She saw an enormous sphere made of the finest crystal. It sparkled in the light of twenty-three enormous stars, shining down on it where it sat on a dark hilltop. There were cracks in it, and it was being held together by ropes.

There was Rand, walking up the hillside, holding a woodsman’s axe. He reached the top and hefted the axe, then swung at the ropes one at a time, chopping them free. The last one parted, and the sphere began to break apart, the beautiful white globe falling in pieces. Rand shook his head.

Innnnnnnnnteresting.

The sphere (and its breaking) sounds – first of all a lot like the Sharom because what, you thought I’d pass up a Rhuidean reference? – like the Dark One’s prison, perhaps. With Rand cutting the ropes like breaking the seals.

Or maybe the Choedan Kal, with all the brilliant light of that enormous power, that he has now broken. Or the world itself, I suppose. I’m going with the Dark One’s prison here, probably.

But what are the twenty-three stars?

Thirteens are common, you can’t swing a cat in this series without hitting a duality, threes and sevens crop up on occasion… but what the hell numbers twenty-three? Except for the graves Bashere once had to dig for oak trees on the orders of the mad general he served, but while there may be no such thing as coincidence, that’s a bridge too far even for me.

Nations? Okay now I’m just curious if I can name them all, so… in the wetlands we have: Altara, Amadicia, Andor, Arafel, Cairhien, Far Madding, Ghealdan, Illian, Kandor, Mayene, Murandy, Saldaea, Shienar, Tar Valon, Tear. Then the Aiel, or: Chareen, Codarra, Daryne, Goshien, Jenn (?), Miagoma, Nakai, Reyn, Shaarad, Shaido (?), Shiande, Taardad, Tomanelle. Then Seanchan and Shara on the edges, the Atha’an Miere and the Tuatha’an, and the dead nations of Malkier, Manetheren, and the Amayar. The Ogier. The even-more-dead nations like Almoth and Eharon and whatnot. But even playing with the obvious ones like how to count the Aiel, or the dead nations, or the city-states, there’s not an obvious 23.

The Hall of the Tower maybe? Three Sitters from each Ajah is 21, so with Amyrlin and Keeper we’re at a much cleaner 23, and there is the whole ‘Watcher of the Seals’ element of the Amyrlin’s role, so twenty-three stars watching could make sense.

Or, hell I don’t know, maybe there are 23 verses in the Karaethon Cycle. Meh.

Well, Egwene’s focused on the Mesaana implications (rather than the Messiah implications; I crack myself up sometimes), which seems fair enough.

“He’s here, Mother. At the White Tower.”

“Who?”

“The Dragon Reborn. He’s asking to see you.”

HERE! WE! GO!

Because you know what this means? It means, once again, that we’re going to get outsider POV of Rand, after a crucial turning point in his character.

Twice. Because first, we got it via Almen Bunt, effectively a random character. We got to see a ‘first glimpse’ of Rand, as it were. But now we get to see through the eyes of one who knows him – or rather, one who knew him. One like him in some ways and so very different in others. An opposing role who once was a friend. There’s just so many potential layers there, through which to observe, and I am inordinately excited for this.

*

Though okay right as I say that we shift POV to Siuan, so I may be pre-empting this.

That said, it’s either going to be some form of outsider POV or it’s going to be Rand’s POV and either way I’m going to be on the damn floor so it’s a win-win situation here.

The Dragon Reborn? Inside Tar Valon?

I mean technically that was the goal all the way back in EotW, so you could argue that he just took a really, really long detour. Across the entire continent, a past life, and near-destruction of the world, but… details.

“He was at the Sunset Gate”

How appropriate. Is there perhaps a Wind Tower for him to climb?

“What is his game, do you think?” Saerin asked.

“Burn me if I know,” Siuan replied. “He’s bound to be mostly insane by now. Maybe he’s frightened, and has come to turn himself in.”

“I doubt that.”

“As do I.”

Harsh, Siuan. But not entirely unfounded – at least on the mostly insane part. He’s not, but first of all how would she know that and second of all, if this were a few days earlier, that would be a much harder one to argue. (For the record, my own interpretation of Rand’s sanity or lack thereof before Dragonmount is a strong vote in favour if It’s Complicated).

Of, course, then there’s the whole issue of ‘how long can you stay sane when the entire world is waiting for you to go mad’ but that is, perhaps, a moot point now.

“Maybe he heard that Elaida was gone,” Siuan said, “and thought that he would be safe here, with an old friend on the Amyrlin Seat.”

Oh no this already hurts. Honestly I think any reference to Rand and Egwene as old friends is probably going to, at this point, but also the way Siuan goes to this idea of Rand needing a place of safety. A refuge. Because in so many ways, for a very long time, she wouldn’t even have been wrong. It’s just that it wasn’t an option and there was no such place and the Dragon Reborn couldn’t afford that kind of weakness, and anyway he was never looking for safety for himself; it was keeping others safe from him that he wanted, back when he was just a shepherd boy holding himself together with determination and fragments of Warder instruction against power(s) trying to claim him from within and without.

But Siuan is remembering that boy, and I’m also remembering Rand in the early days at the Stone of Tear, trying so earnestly to let Elayne and Egwene help him with saidin, and how that, from a certain perspective, is not really so different from trying to find some safety in friends.

“Reports call him mistrustful and erratic, with a demanding temper and an insistence on avoiding Aes Sedai.”

I mean, up until – what, a day ago at most? That would be not at all inaccurate. Especially from the outside.

Really I think this whole scene with Siuan and Saerin is largely to remind us of how Rand comes across to the rest of the world. Because the thing about that Dragonmount epiphany – a crucial part of it, but one that is likely going to also result in some complications – is that it was unwitnessed. Just Rand, alone, thinking. And if the cleansing of saidin was difficult to believe by those not directly involved (and even by some of those who were), how much harder will this be, in its own way?

And just to set the scene even more ominously as far as anyone but the reader is concerned, the floor tiles are now the colour (and sheen, and probably texture, and very possibly actual chemical composition) of blood.

It is interesting to contrast the feeling of approaching this meeting to how it felt in the buildup to Rand’s meeting with Tuon last book. That was just full to the brim of impending doom, of ‘there is no possible way under the sun that this will end well’, of ‘oh no, how disastrously is this going to go?’ because at that point Rand was in freefall and the only certainty was disaster. Now, there’s a sense of lightness in approaching this meeting. I mean, I’m still quite sure it’ll hurt me, but the actual tension is different. It feels like waiting for catharsis, almost, rather than waiting for catastrophe.

So hey, maybe we just look at that meeting with Tuon as a practice run for Rand in terms of how to negotiate treaties with a woman who controls a decent part of a continent. If nothing else, it set the bar about as low as it could possibly be, so this can only be an improvement!

Siuan had harboured a small hope that she herself would be chosen [as Keeper]. Now Egwene had so many demands on her time – and was becoming so capable on her own – that she was relying on Siuan less and less.

That was a good thing. But it was also infuriating.

Oh, Siuan. Siuan’s thoughts about her position in the Tower and how it has changed are always a little sad to read. She’s so strong that it’s easy, almost, to forget just how much she’s gone through – and she can’t even just put it behind her and move on because she’s surrounded, every single day, by constant reminders of all she has lost and all that has changed. And even so, we only get these occasional moments of sadness or bitterness or frustration from her. The rest of the time she just… keeps going.

She wanted to do what she’d set out to do, all those years before with Moiraine.

It really is kind of incredible dedication to a cause. Even if ‘shepherding’ the Dragon Reborn is perhaps not really what is needed, she has paved so much of the way, and even from the sidelines has been instrumental, and this has been more or less her entire adult life. A thankless and often punishing task, one that has gone and will likely continue to go largely unacknowledged, one that has brought her hatred and suspicion and pain, and yet she does not question it, does not falter.

It's… I guess in a way it comes back to the whole idea of those who choose vs those who are chosen, but I like the way we see these characters who aren’t the Chosen One but who still give everything they are, and everything they have, to this world and this cause. Some because they must and some because they choose to and some for reasons in between but it’s again this sense that while Rand stands at the centre of it, there are all these other stories and sacrifices and triumphs and tragedies spiralling out from that centre, all weaving together into this pattern. Or Pattern, as it were.

Also, I would like to strongly second the ‘with Moiraine’ part of that sentence. Can we have her back yet please? I’ve been good, I promise!

Bryne’s here too, which means I also get to reminisce about the first (and last) time he met Rand, even before Siuan did, but another scene of Rand as little more than a shepherd, uncertain and afraid and getting by on determination alone and yet, as with his meeting with Siuan, still surprising those around him by being just a little more than expected.

(As for Rand’s first meeting with Egwene, we have no textual evidence but given their ages it probably involved eating mud).

“You came faster than I’d assumed you’d be able to,” she said.

That is, quite literally, what she said. I’m sorry, I’m twelve.

“She’s what we need now,” Bryne said, “but you’re what we needed then. You did well, Siuan.”

YOU DID WELL

I’m sorry, Moiraine’s letter to Rand really just loaded all variants of that phrase quite heavily and it’s not Moiraine saying it to Siuan but it may as well be, and to have anyone looking at all she has done and all she has been through, looking at someone most Aes Sedai now dismiss as inconsequential at best and to blame for their problems at worst, and actually seeing everything she’s achieved and everything she’s sacrificed and to just acknowledge it outright is… such a small phrase but it means so much. Because how many others would say that? How many others could? So few even know what she’s done and why and for how long. Egwene, maybe, but Egwene is still in some ways her protégé and so not really in a position to give that kind of praise. Moiraine, but she’s still… on holiday. And that’s really kind of it.

There’s a reason these kinds of tasks are called thankless.

“He’s standing below, watched over by at least a hundred Warders and twenty-six sisters – two full circles. Undoubtedly he’s shielded”

My first thought was ‘good thing this is Rand after Dragonmount otherwise I don’t think there’d be a Tower right now’, but then, Rand before Dragonmount would probably quite literally not have been caught dead within balefire distance of the White Tower.

Whereas now… what a stark difference this highlights in his entire mindset and character. Once, the possibility of thirteen Aes Sedai sent him away from a city he was holding, tense and desperate and furious. Once, being shielded was – well, I believe the direct quote was ‘Lews Therin fled screaming’. Once, Aes Sedai so much as touching the One Power in his presence without his permission was like dancing on a minefield.

Now… he stands calmly, shielded and within the Tower itself, the stronghold of the Aes Sedai, of his own free will (and that’s it, isn’t it; that’s what truly makes all the difference in so many ways).

Also a bit of a random comparison but I can’t help but be reminded of Taim walking into Caemlyn to claim Rand’s amnesty, guarded and distrusted and hated by pretty much everyone around him and yet appearing, himself, all but unaffected by it.

“Well, what did he look like, then?”

“Honestly, Siuan? He looked like an Aes Sedai.”

Well. Lews Therin was. In an even older sense of the title.

And if we’re looking at the title itself, and its meaning… servant of all is sort of in the job description of a messiah figure, in a way.

I like how we’re reminded that, because of her Talent for seeing ta’veren, Rand literally glows to Siuan’s eyes. Which means the Dragon Reborn, the chosen one, the saviour, having now fully embraced his role, is walking into the Tower literally haloed in light. There’s just a tiny bit of religious symbolism here, is what I’m getting at.

I also – for all that I’m still hoping for a glimpse of Rand through Egwene’s eyes – am very very happy with the choice to show this through Siuan’s POV. Because in so many ways it is a reflection of that scene in TGH where he is summoned to the Amyrlin, and she gets her first look at the boy who will be the Dragon but does not yet know it, and tells him what his role will be, and he surprises her in his stubbornness and strength but still does not truly accept what she says.

Now, we get the Dragon Reborn calling for an audience with the Amyrlin, having finally and truly embraced the full reality of that role. The first was, in a way, to set his path. This, then, feels almost like closing it. And in between those bookends was that long, fraught journey towards acceptance.

Me? Obsessed with symmetry and reflection in a narrative? Never.

She froze as he met her eyes. There was something indefinable about them, a weight, an age. As though the man behind them was seeing through the light of a thousand lives compounded into one. His face did look like that of an Aes Sedai. Those eyes, at least, had agelessness.

This is one of the things I just absolutely love about outsider POV: the way it allows you to almost re-experience the full weight of what you already know. To be able to almost… soft-reset, and then open your eyes and have the impact of it all over again. None of this is news, really, to a reader who has seen Rand atop Dragonmount, or even in the first chapter of this book. But we get it again anyway, because for one thing it’s fun and for another it just serves to highlight what he looks like to one who does not have the privilege of being in his head (not that that’s… a particularly exclusive list these days, but that’s beside the point).

And it’s also interesting how this doesn’t humanise Rand in the perception of others – he’s still very much in the position of being seen more as a force of nature than a person – but the tone and the effect are so very different to before, for instance when he was lost or in pain or just desperate (or all of the above) and yet perceived as arrogant, inhuman, even monstrous. There’s still this sense of… not being seen as just a person, being seen more in the heroic lines and angles of power and weight of legend, but the difference, I think, is that Rand himself accepts it now. It is now a part of who he is, and a part of him he accepts, and embraces, and steps willingly into.

It also gives him some rather extraordinary weight of personality so making his way through a crowd of Warders is a piece of cake. See, sometimes being the chosen one has its benefits.

“And Siuan Sanche. You’ve changed since we last met.”

Oh. Okay yeah the fact that we get him saying this to her, rather than the other way around, is a really, really excellent way of just subtly shifting the entire balance of power – not even quite power; something else I can’t think of a good word for – of the scene.

It's the way it takes the way this scene is so neatly set up to be a bookend of that first meeting between them, and just… flips the obvious line on its axis. It’s still there, we’re still on script, but it’s ever so slightly not what you expect, and that difference itself becomes the point. Because Rand is no longer the object of the scene; he is very much its subject. The assignment of agency and proactivity has shifted (he has chosen, now, rather than been chosen; a semantic shift that makes perhaps literally all the difference in the world), and this is just a really cool way to play with that.

If that made any sense.

“You once took an arrow for me. Did I thank you for that?”

This… this gentleness is absolutely killing me and we’re only a few lines into his actual appearance in this chapter. The way it’s no longer forced, or agonised, or desperate, or serving only as a sharp contrast to either anger or apathy to remind you of who he once was. Instead it’s just… there. Without brittleness or the aching sense of something lost. There’s just a weird kind of beauty in the simplicity of this, in how it’s just… him, without any of the hundred things waiting to shatter beneath that statement.

Maybe that’s it; the gentleness that doesn’t feel like the precursor to shattering glass. The way this isn’t a veiled threat, or a barb, or a forced admission, or a conversational gambit. Just thanks, remembered honestly and offered freely and that’s… it.

(Moiraine once took a Forsaken for you, Rand. Be sure to thank her for that too).

Anyway, Siuan sings Egwene’s praises as Amyrlin, of course, and apparently everything Rand says or does in this chapter is going to just get me because:

He smiled again. “I should have expected nothing less. Strange, but I feel that seeing her again will hurt, though that is one wound that has well and truly healed. I can still remember the pain of it, I suppose.”

Again it’s just the gentleness that pervades all of this, where once there was turmoil and pain and a rage in him fit to burn the world, or else terrifying coldness and absence and a distant voice screaming. It’s like everything has finally fallen silent and only then do you realise how loud everything was before, and how maddening. Just… Rand being able to smile simply, and feel and express emotions in the normal human range.

And that sense of… wonder, almost, that you get from him at that fact. It’s—there is very much a rebirth kind of feel to a lot of this, because a part of it is that Rand is very, very aware of where he has just come from and where he stands now. That’s the whole point: to get to this, he had to choose it and realise it and open his eyes, I suppose. And so now he’s seeing everything through that new filter (or perhaps without the noise of the old one) and there’s a kind of beautiful simplicity and something like but also entirely unlike innocence to it.

Tiana has a letter for him with a red seal… one of Verin’s, maybe? If so, Rand sure has a track record with Aes Sedai and letters left to him. She did have several, when we saw her with Mat… and I struggle to think of who else would have left one. Cadsuane, maybe?

“Do your best to calm Egwene when I am done,” he said to Siuan. Then he took a deep breath and strode forward

CHILDREN. ALL OF THEM. That, right there, for probably the first time this book, is absolutely 100% a glimpse of Rand al’Thor, Woolheaded Sheepherder, and you cannot convince me otherwise.

Wise, gentle, reconciled to his role, remembering his past life and accepting who he is… and still taking a deep breath and making contingency plans before going to a stubborn-off with his former childhood sweetheart. I’m laughing.

*

OH IT’S EGWENE, WE DO GET TO SEE THIS IN EGWENE’S POV, YES THIS IS EVERYTHING I WANTED.

This was not Rand al’Thor, friend of her childhood, the man she’d assumed she’d one day marry.

Oh no, just start right out with a gut-punch why don’t you. No, Egwene, he is.

Except… he also isn’t, and that’s the sad part. But if this is to work, I still think that’s going to be the key: that they know—knew—each other as people. Except now Egwene is deliberately telling herself not to do that, and while it’s understandable it’s… that way lies the end of the Second Age.

No. This man was the Dragon Reborn. The most dangerous man ever to draw breath.

This hurts me in exactly the way I was hoping it would.

Just as Rand has finally accepted himself, and in some ways come back to himself (not quite, because you can’t go back you can only go forwards as the Wheel of Time turns, but he’s no longer forcing everything about who he was away), Egwene is forcing herself to see him as anything but that. As just the Dragon Reborn, legend and monster and saviour and destroyer. It’s a perfect mis-alignment of timings.

(Egwene is steeling herself, just as Rand has finally stopped trying to become steel).

“Egwene,” Rand said

IT’S! ABOUT! THE NAMES!

She’s thinking of him, emphatically, as the Dragon Reborn… but the dialogue tag betrays her. We are in her POV and as soon as he speaks, he is Rand.

And the first word he says is her name. Not ‘Mother’ or ‘Amyrlin’, not the opening of some request or demand. Just… ‘Egwene’.

He is the Dragon Reborn, come to see the Amyrlin—he asked for the Amyrlin—and she is the Amyrlin steeling herself to face the Dragon Reborn and yet in the first moment, when that silence of waiting is broken, they are Rand and Egwene and—

I just. Maybe I’m reading too much into this but it’s perfect and it hurts and I love it.

(Names are important).

He nodded to her, as if in respect. “You have done your part, I see. The Amyrlin’s stole fits you well.”

WHY DOES THIS HURT ME? WHY AM I EXPERIENCING AN EMOTION?

They’ve both just come so far and through so much and they hardly even know one another anymore, and there’s this almost-but-not-quite uncertainty and almost-but-not-quite familiarity, and yet it feels not like the anticipation before an ‘everything goes wrong’ moment but instead the anticipation of… maybe, finally, finding their way back to something? Or forwards, I suppose. It’s like the tentative formality of meeting someone for the first time in years, unsure of them and of yourself and of everything that’s happened in the interim but there’s something weirdly hopeful about it.

Maybe I’m just so used to liveblogging pain that I don’t know what to do with myself when it’s not there, except in echoes and memories and all the space that has grown between them, but this is like… a hand offered across that intervening space.

From what she had heard of Rand recently, she had not anticipated such calm in him.

I mean. That’s… fair.

Well, or she might have been led to anticipate a very different kind of calm. The calm of ice or cuendillar that could in an instant become, you know, balefiring an entire fortress out of existence.

Maybe save your musings on whether or not he’s a criminal for whatever passes as a Geneva Convention in this world, Egwene. We don’t have time to unpack all of that right now.

“What has happened to you?” she found herself asking as she leaned forward on the Amyrlin Seat.

“I was broken,” Rand said, hands behind his back. “And then, remarkably, I was reforged. I think he almost had me, Egwene.”

HELP.

THIS IS JUST.

I… wow. What do I even do with this?

Just as the first word out of his mouth was her name, and her first thought of him was as Rand… now, despite sitting on the Amyrlin Seat—which we are quite literally reminded of here, and I don’t think that’s accidental—her first words are… call it concern, call it curiosity, call it demand, call it accusation even, but that’s not Amyrlin to Dragon Reborn there. That’s not the opening of negotiations or a summons or a meeting. That’s Egwene, looking at Rand. It’s like Nynaeve in TFoH reaching for him almost instinctively and saying ‘at least let me Heal you’.

And then Rand’s response!

‘I was broken’. Such a simple statement for so, so much more. And yet… that’s what it is. It’s the simplicity, again, that gets me. The simplicity and the self-awareness and the way he can look at it now, with that sense of removal, but this time not because he’s walled himself off from the pain; instead, he lets himself feel it but he has accepted its reason and its source and its necessity. He’s no longer fighting against himself, and that lets him bear so much more, because so much of that pain came from that battle against himself, and from the fear of what he might become.

He spent so long trying to forge himself into steel, but in the end that’s not the reforging he needed. And now he knows that, and sees it, and there’s just something about a character who can stand on the far side of their own breaking and their own agony and speak of it calmly, whole.

It's just an entire situation I’m having here.

And that last bit. ‘I think he almost had me’. The memory of ‘it is HIM’. And the fact that Rand can see that too, now; can see how close he came to the Shadow without ever turning from the Light, and understand that nuance.

But also… there is still one very glaring loose end there: Rand has used the True Power. Sure, he doesn’t seem particularly… uh… compromised by that at this point, but I still just cannot imagine that won’t be brought back in some way.

He spoke differently. There was a formality to his words that she didn’t recognise.

And then it’s lines like this that keep this scene from being… to perfect? Not in terms of execution, but in terms of ‘things going well and painlessly for characters’. Because there is still a sadness to this, to Rand and Egwene looking at one another (and naming one another!) and seeing the person behind the role, and looking for the person they knew, and yet also still seeing elements of a stranger.

Because they have changed. Neither of them is at all the child they were when they left Emond’s Field, and there is so much between them now, and that connection they have is worn and thinned and this isn’t a joyful reunion. There’s catharsis here, and a tentative possibility of peace or friendship, but there’s also this recognition, each to each, of how much of what used to be is now gone. They’ve both been hardened and shaped by their experiences and they both know it and recognise it in each other—perhaps in part because they both also very clearly by this point recognise it in themselves.

“Why have you come before the Amyrlin Seat?” she asked.

And now we get the opening of Amyrlin-to-Dragon. But that’s not where we began. We began with Rand and Egwene, and I’ll shut up about it in a minute but this whole play of naming and identity is one of those little things that gets me pretty much every time it turns up in a story.

“I’ve hated you before,” Rand said, turning back to Egwene.

I’M FINE! THIS IS FINE!

Yes I am quoting pretty much every line of dialogue in this scene but LISTEN, IT HURTS ME.

The thing is, this is a statement utterly without malice. It’s not a threat or an insult—not even the childish sort of insult they might have exchanged last time they met. It’s… really, the only word that comes to mind is a confession.

Which plays into one of the features of Rand’s character that stands out so far in the brief moments we’ve seen him in this book: genuine self-knowledge, and self-knowledge that he fully accepts. There is no longer any remnant of denial.

And that allows him to make statements like this and have them come across as, weirdly, almost benevolent. Nothing he has said is said with the intent to deceive, or to wound, or even really to manipulate. It’s just truth—and truth that he himself fully understands and accepts now.

So he’s not fighting against her out of fear of being caught up in Aes Sedai strings, just as he’s not fighting against Lews Therin’s memories out of fear of being caught up in Kinslayer’s fate. Instead of fighting against everything up to and including himself, he’s just… him.

“It occurs to me that I’ve been trying too hard.”

That’s exactly it. He’s been fighting, when in some ways what he needed was to learn how (and where, and when) to surrender. Though even ‘surrender’ connotes a struggle or a conflict, and I think a lot of this realisation is that it’s not about fighting or forcing or struggling; it’s about accepting, and guiding, and leading. And choosing, of course.

“A fear that the acts I accomplished would be yours, and not my own.” He hesitated. “I should have wished for such a convenient set of backs upon which to heap the blame for my crimes.”

Wow. Okay, that’s… a line.

Um.

Damn.

It’s almost ironic, the way he instead tried to heap all the responsibility on himself and take all that blame and pain, and let it damn him and in doing so tried to pretend it freed him to act as he needed, no longer held back by such trivial concerns as humanity and his own conscience or sense of redeemability. But ultimately it came down to the same thing, in a way: an inability to accept what he was doing, and so trying to find a place to put all that pain.

(Or, as Lews Therin once advised, ‘If it hurts too much, make it hurt someone else instead’).

But now he sees that, too, and so instead of trying to escape the pain or treat it as ‘I’m damned either way so may as well burn it all’, he understands his responsibility but in a more… balanced way, I suppose.

The Dragon Reborn had come to the White Tower to engage in idle philosophy

Moridin? That you?

I do sort of wonder, because I’m me, what impact, if any, Rand’s epiphany might (or could; I don’t really expect the story to go there, much as I might wish it to) have on Moridin, given the link they share.

“Rand,” Egwene said, softening her tone.

And now we get the reflection of the names from the opening of this conversation! It’s about the names! It’s about the dialogue tags! It’s about identity and perception and that thread of friendship that still binds them and might in the end be enough to save them from their predecessors’ fate!

“I’m going to have some sisters talk to you to decide if there is anything… wrong with you. Please try to understand.”

I mean you could not have phrased that less tactfully if you tried, Egwene, but it is kind of understandable. We may know full well that there’s less wrong with Rand now than there has been at pretty much any point since the start of the series, but how in the Light would anyone else be able to be sure of that? He’s certainly not acting like the Rand Egwene once knew, or even the Rand she last saw. Nor is he behaving like the Rand from whatever reports she’s received.

And yes, while I think the world waiting and watching for him to go mad hurt far more than it helped, there’s also the fact that that is what everyone and their mother expects—because up until what, a few months ago, that was inevitable.

So then in walks the Dragon Reborn, acting like… well, this, and what else are you going to do? A bit like the cleansing of saidin, as a reader you want all the other characters to just take it on faith, but the rather sad irony of Rand’s position is that his own word is the one no one is entirely sure they can trust. And the only one here who can vouch for him is himself. Elayne or Aviendha or Min might be able to, but none of them is nearby, and also that bond’s been kept pretty quiet.

So anyway. Yeah, I can see where she’s coming from on that.

To his credit, so can Rand.

“Oh, I do understand, Egwene. And I am sorry to deny you, but I have too much to do.”

There’s the woolheaded sheepherder again. He’s smiling here, and I am quite sure this is a bit of the old Rand dropping by to say hello and needle Egwene just a bit, because that’s what they do.

“A friend rides to his death without allies.”

HE NAMED YOU FRIEND. AND NOW YOU REMEMBER HIM. THIS IS FINE I’M FINE EVERYTHING’S FINE.

“This is the part I regret. I did not wish to come into your centre of power, which you have achieved so well, and defy you. But it cannot be helped. You must know what my plans are so that you can prepare.”

To be able to say that without so much as the hit of a threat in it is… quite a power move, I have to say. Because even here, I think he’s still just being absolutely and even benevolently honest. He doesn’t want to undermine her. He doesn’t even really want to challenge her. He understands where she’s coming from – which itself puts us so, so far from where he was just days ago, that he can meet her uncertainty and suspicion and say ‘okay yeah, that’s fair’.

And if he had time, I wonder if he might actually agree to that particular request.

But he doesn’t have time. Which brings us to the other extraordinary part of this statement: willingly offering up communication. Just. Straight up saying ‘you need to know my plans’. Mark this date in your calendars, friends: a Wheel of Time character just offered, unprompted, voluntarily, to share their plans with another character, so that they can prepare.

I am astonished.

“The last time I tried to seal the Bore”

You know, just the other day.

“I believe that saidin and saidar must both be used.”

I think he’s absolutely right there—it’s a part of what I love about Rand and Egwene, childhood friends for all that they’ve grown apart, holding the roles that they do; the idea that this bond between them, strained as it is, could allow them to do what Lews Therin and Latra Posae could not—but I also… he shall hold a blade of light in his hands, and the three shall be one. I just… wonder.

Egwene leaned forward, studying him. There didn’t seem to be madness in his eyes. She knew those eyes. She knew Rand.

YES!

THIS IS EVERYTHING I WANTED! That she sees him. Looks past the Dragon Reborn, past her role as Amyrlin, and for a moment she is just Egwene looking at Rand and it is by nature such a simple thing—stripping away everything but that simple identity—but it’s also the thing that can give them a chance to do it differently this time. This chance of understanding, this one small thing that could tip them towards cooperation and trust rather than letting them turn away from each other or fall apart.

Light, she thought, I’m wrong. I can’t think of him only as the Dragon Reborn. I’m here for a reason. He’s here for a reason. To me, he must be Rand. Because Rand can be trusted, while the Dragon Reborn must be feared.

Maybe it’s very Sanderson to have this stated outright, but I’m not even going to complain, because it’s… perfect. To allow, in the end, trust and friendship and who they are rather than purely what they are come into it as well, even just in some small way, to bridge that gap. It’s what Lews Therin and Latra Posae couldn’t do, but Rand and Egwene have a chance to try again.

I just… have been spinning around on this EXACT CONCEPT for, I don’t know, several books now, and to see it playing out so plainly here is everything I want and I am never going to be okay again in my life.

“Which are you?” she whispered unconsciously.

He heard. “I am both, Egwene. I remember him. Lews Therin. I can see his entire life, every desperate moment. I see it like a dream, but a clear dream. My own dream. It’s part of me.”

It’s a nice touch, that he speaks of it as a dream, to the one who understands dreams so well.

It’s also just a lot, to have gone from ‘so many parts of him, mind splintered in glittering shards, all of them screaming’ to ‘sorrows and his own suicide’ to a clear dream he accepts as a part of himself. The pain and desperation of it are still there, but he’s no longer fighting them, because he no longer sees it as something he’s bound to. It’s just a part of who he is, but it doesn’t have to define what he will be.

I also like this because Egwene was one of the first to notice him speaking to a voice in his mind. And now she gets this, just an honest and accepting response. It seems fitting, somehow.

The words were those of a madman, but they were spoken evenly. She looked at him, and remembered the youth that he had been. The earnest young man. Not solemn like Perrin, but not wild like Mat. Solid, straightforward. The type of man you could trust with anything.

Even the fate of the world.

THAT’S IT THAT’S IT RIGHT THERE. If they did not know each other, this could be an impasse. Not as disastrous as Rand’s meeting with Tuon, perhaps, because he’s a little… uh… less omnicidal at this particular moment, but likely just as unsuccessful. An Amyrlin who could not trust the Dragon, and a Dragon who could not afford to give her the assurances she needed, and so two powers working in parallel but separately, almost in opposition.

But she knows him. And it’s the youth he had been—it is LITERALLY THE MEMORY OF A SHEPHERD NAMED RAND AL’THOR, the echo of one of my favourite quotes—that tips the balance the other way this time.

It’s Rand. The boy he tried for so long to destroy, because to be him hurt too much.

And I also really love how it isn’t about some Grand True Love between them that does it. They were childhood sweethearts, sure, but the love between them is that of friends, of a shared childhood, of something very much like family. And I like that there’s this implicit importance and weight placed on that; that in its way it’s as crucial to this moment as the ‘veins of gold’ were on Dragonmount

This is what Latra Posae and Lews Therin had. And so instead it falls to Egwene and Rand, to learn from their mistakes, and do what they could not. It is what Rand realised on Dragonmount, and what he is playing out now. A chance to try again.

And it’s because he’s Rand that that’s possible. It’s not Lews Therin, or the Dragon Reborn (but it is also both of those, because he is both of those).

“In one month’s time,” Rand said, “I’m going to travel to Shayol Ghul and break the last remaining seals on the Dark One’s prison. I want your help.”

Well. I mean. Okay. Points for honest and straightforward communication, I suppose. I love that he just walks into the Tower and drops this on her like a grenade, though. It amuses me.

Ah, so she thinks the crystal sphere in her dream represents the seals or the prison as well.

“Rand, no”

Rand: Rand yes!

Sorry, couldn’t help myself.

“I’m going to need you, all of you”

Rand openly admitting to needing anyone or anything, and again just as a statement rather than a threat or an angry demand, is another thing that’s new and kind of refreshing.

“I hope to the Light that this time, you will give me your support.”

Rand to Egwene, remembering Lews Therin to Latra Posae. And if everyone is someone reborn, who’s to say she isn’t? (I’m not… really sure whether I’d want that to be true or not, so I suppose it’s nice that it’s not stated one way or the other, at least up to this point. But it could be a fun one to play with). Either way, those very much are the roles they’re echoing, and I swear I’ll shut up about this but I still just love how, so closely following Rand’s realisation on Dragonmount, we get to actually watch that kind of chance-to-try-again play out. A chance to work together, rather than apart.

“And then… well, then we will discuss my terms.”

Ah well, I suppose it was too much to hope for him to communicate the whole plan right now. Baby steps and all that.

Also, you know, narrative choices and the need to keep at least something back.

“Your terms?” Egwene demanded. “You will see,” he said, turning as if to leave.

So… the way it’s framed puts us into very slightly antagonistic (and much more familiar) territory of lack of communication and demands and terms.

But I wonder what terms he’s referring to, because there is a nonzero probability that he’s talking about Callandor here. In which case, it’s not entirely impossible that the terms he’s referring to are, in effect, those of his own surrender.

I could be wrong. I very probably am. But it’s… an interesting possibility to consider. And it would be kind of fitting, in a way, for that to be the uncommunicated and therefore misunderstood thing here.

Turns out ‘the Amyrlin’s Anger’ is Egwene just shouting at her childhood friend ‘don’t you turn your back on me when I’m talking to you, Rand al’Thor’ and Rand turning back like a boy who tracked mud into the house. I love them, I really do.

“We must talk about this,” she said. “Plan.”

“That is why I came to you. To let you plan.”

He seemed amused.

Oh, he’s absolutely amused. Part of him still is the boy you knew, and this is honestly just classic Rand-and-Egwene, for all that it’s also on an entirely different level. They antagonise one another: it’s what they do. But I don’t think there’s true anger here, on either side. And again, that is what could save them. That ‘anger’ between them is… this, rather than that snapping of tension and dropping of any possibility of a truce and turning immediately to planning their next moves, all thought of alliance or restraint over, between Rand and Tuon.

Anyway. The other thing here is that… it’s easy to be exasperated with Egwene, because just listen to Rand, he’s sane now damn it, and he’s almost certainly right about the seals.

But honestly? In her position? Knowing what she knows—and not knowing all the things she doesn’t know, like the actual state of Rand’s mind—it’s hard to fault her for pushing back on this. He walks in, says he’s fine and that he remembers a dead man’s entire life and also that they need to break the prison of the embodiment of entropy and chaos and evil, okay bye!

Like. As Amyrlin, it’s her job to say ‘okay, right, I’m with you, but also what the fuck’. It would be irresponsible not to.

Of course… I get the impression Rand knows that, too. And is, perhaps, counting on it. He came to her to let her plan, and he doesn’t seem surprised or upset by the fact that she doesn’t just immediately say ‘okay cool when do we start’, and he has a certain respect for the position she holds.

I think it’s entirely possible this is what he wants from her. For her to plan. Because he doesn’t have time to. And because, just as she looks at him and sees someone she can trust with the fate of the world, he looks at her and sees someone he can trust with planning and logistics and getting the Aes Sedai to get themselves where he needs them. A kind of ‘this is what I’m going to do, now do whatever it is you need to do because I don’t need to micromanage and I also don’t have time to, okay see you at Tarmon Gai’don’.

“And so here we come to it,” Rand said.

Yeah, he saw this coming.

“Egwene al’Vere, Watcher of the Seals, Flame of Tar Valon, may I have your permission to withdraw?”

He asked it so politely. She couldn’t tell if he was mocking her or not.

The thing is, I really don’t think he is. It’s like how earlier he said he didn’t want to come into her place of power and undermine her. He’s giving her, I think, an honest gesture with genuine respect. Because now, at peace with himself as he is, it costs him nothing to do so. She is not his enemy, and I do think his respect for her is honest, and I think he still cares about her as a friend, and what does he lose by giving her a small bow and her titles and the opportunity to grant him permission to leave?

And of course Egwene is conflicted, because on the one hand she can’t keep him here like Elaida tried to, but on the other hand…

“I will not let you break the seals,” she said. “That is madness.”

“Then meet me at the place known as the Field of Merrilor, just to the north. We will talk before I go to Shayol Ghul. For now, I do not want to defy you, Egwene. But I must go.’

Ah. And so we have a battleground.

As for the rest… well. It’s not quite accord, but nor is it disaster. It’s not even quite a true impasse. There’s tension now, sure, but it’s a) not even in the same hemisphere as as bad as it would have been if Rand hadn’t had some alone time on a mountain to think, literally, about his life choices and b) not insurmountable.

And c) I still think there’s a very real chance this is all Rand actually needed or wanted out of this. Egwene now knows his plan and his timing and the battleground, and she can take care of the rest.

It’s almost—gasp—as if Rand al’Thor, Dragon Reborn, has truly learned to delegate.

The chamber was still enough for Egwene to hear the faint breeze making the rose window groan it its lead.

The wind, for Rand, against the rose, for the Aes Sedai. (Also, listen, I have not forgotten that Eldrene was the Rose of the Sun).

“Very well,” Egwene said. “But this is not ended, Rand.”

“There are no endings, Egwene.”

IT’S! ABOUT! THE NAMES!

They talk a big game about each other’s titles, and wonder if they’re really the person they each once knew, but they both open and closes with nothing but each other’s names, and it means absolutely everything.

Also, that’s… really not a bad outcome. Honestly, this could have been so much worse. Anger? Try ‘okay um that’s unexpected and I’m still not sure you’re not insane but…sure. Okay’.

Which really is all you need, right? It’s agreement with a bit of hesitation, and at this stage in the game that’s a damn victory.

Again, I can’t help but contrast it with that absolute catastrophe at Falme, and compared to that? This is just friends sticking their tongues out at each other on the way out. Rand knows he can count on Egwene to be there, at least. Will she agree with him when she arrives? Who knows. But that’s a problem for another time. For now, he at least knows she’ll go, and that’s all he can ask. And he can leave the rest of the planning in her hands.

And she knows what he’s planning, and knows he wants her as an ally, and can therefore make said plans.

I don’t think this is ended either, and I’m sure there’s plenty of potential conflict to come, but this was, all things considered, really kind of impressive in its lack of explosions.

(Also, ‘there are no endings’. Now who’s giving Aes Sedai answers, Rand? As well as probably spoilers for the last line of the series. Rude.)

Oh, interesting. So Rand’s ta’veren hyperdrive powers pretty much literally froze all the other Aes Sedai in place. Because this needed to be a meeting between Rand and Egwene. Because of their roles, yes, but also because of that thread of connection they still share. And so it had to be the two of them, because that was the only chance of this working at all.

Egwene frowned. She hadn’t felt it that way. Perhaps because she thought of him as Rand.

I… yeah. Because that’s what he needed: to have this conversation with someone who could see him. Even then, it barely came out to something almost resembling accord. They needed that small weight on the scales, to have that chance. And so she was free, because it was the Dragon Reborn, and not Rand, who was holding the others silent, in a way.

Or at least that’s how I’m reading this because it plays into my entire thing for names and identity and perception, and the importance thereof.

“We need to discuss his words. The Hall of the Tower will reconvene in one hour’s time for discussion.”

Which, really, is exactly what they need to be doing. Now they have the information, and they can figure out… a battle plan, I suppose. Okay. We’re there now. We have a place and a time (this place, this day, which of course is followed by the lesser sadness, yes I remember sequences of chapter titles why are you looking at me like that) and the beginnings of a plan. I’m… it’s been five years and I’m not entirely ready for this.

“And someone follow to make sure he really leaves.”

You’re just afraid he’ll find some way to prank you on his way out, don’t lie.

“Then how? How do we stop him?”

That, Silviana, is not the question you need to be asking. I mean, I get it. I really do. And I’m not sure how they could not think that, at least initially. But… the time for working against each other’s aims, when you are all on the same side, is over.

“We need allies,” Egwene said.

Which, again, I think is precisely the point. That is something it makes absolute sense for Rand to delegate to the Amyrlin Seat, who has the power and the standing to gather allies and play the games of politics, and bring her portion of the Forces of the Light to… the Field of Merrilor, I suppose.

She took a deep breath. “He might be persuaded by people that he trusts.” Or he might be forced to change his mind if confronted by a large enough group united to stop him.

Oh, Egwene, no. You can’t be another Latra Posae.

But perhaps it would be too easy for this to actually just be their only not-quite-conflict. I still think it was more a success than a failure, all told, and I stand by everything I said about the importance of their friendship in letting them see each other, but I think we’re looking at one final testing of that, before the end.

Next (ToM ch 4) Previous (ToM ch 2)

[baskervilleshound]

Her Cookies Were to Die For (PART 3)

((hello everyone. Thank you all so kindly for following along and waiting patiently for the next part. Originally, I was just planning on this being a small sickfic?

But the plot is deepening, and becoming a lot more serious than I originally thought it would. Let me all know what you think is happening. I won’t tell you if you’re right, though. No spoilers, after all ;)

Snatcher let out a soft groan as he turned, curling tighter into the pastel colored pillows around him.

Wait. Pillows…?!

The ghost of Subcon Forest was in shock as his eyes snapped wide open. Why, he wasn’t in the forest at all anymore! No, he was in Hat Kid’s ship, curled up under a blanket in a massive pile of pillows.

The room was dark and nearly silent other than the over-excited squeaks coming from the telescope in the center of the cozy bedroom. Immediately, as the telescope continued to make noise, a rustling of blankets could be heard.

Snatcher could easily see Hat Kid climbing out of her bed, and running to him.

“Snatcher…! You’re awake!” she gasped as she nearly threw herself onto the ghost, hugging his fluffy mane.

“Agh! Kiddo, get off of me…!” Snatcher barked before pulling the blanket over his head, peeling the girl off of himself. “You don’t jump on someone who already feels awful!”

“Now, what’s all the racket going on in here, honey? Oh, looks like the big grump is finally awake,” said a sweet voice from the doorway.

Snatcher lifted the blanket to peer over and glare at whoever had been speaking. It was a cat, dawning a chef’s hat and coat. She had a hand on her hip.

“Snatcher, now you be nice to her. You have no idea what she went through tonight getting you here,” the Cooking Cat continued.

“Well maybe I would think about it if she didn’t clobber me the moment I woke up,” said the ghost, showing a toothy snarl as he rolled his eyes.

Hat Kid frowned , but still refused to leave Snatcher’s side.

“I thought you were dying,” she said, her big blue eyes locking onto Snatcher’s.

Unexpectedly, the ghost began to laugh. He cackled so hard that his stomach hurt!

“AhahahahahaAAAH! You fool. I’m already dead. Come on now. I knew you were dull kiddo, but not that dull.”

Cooking Cat shook her head and let out a deep sigh.

“Well, clearly, you’re fine if you have the energy to laugh and insult us,” the cat said, before turning her back. “Hattie, if you need me, I’ll be in the kitchen. Thought I’d start breakfast, you know, since it’s technically morning in earth hours. Though you certainly can’t tell up here.”

Snatcher sat up in the massive pile of pillows that he had been lying in and yawned, rubbing at his glowing eyes with a set of claws.

“Y’know, kid, this has been fun, but I need to get back to my forest,” he murmured.

“Are you okay though?” Hat Kid asked, tilting her head. “You’re still all…blue in the face. I don’t know if you should go back yet.”

Snatcher was caught a bit off guard by how serious the kid sounded. She was staring at him with no hint of a smile on her face. Quite clearly, she was worried, and that honestly was not like her at all. All traces of that playful, childish nature, had temporarily vanished.

“Geez, when did you get so grim?” the ghost asked before lying back down on the pillows. Perhaps he would tease her idea of him staying for just a moment.

Hat Kid only stared at him with a frown.

“Ugh,” Snatcher huffed. “Fine. I’ll stay for a little while. But only if you tell that cat to make me some bacon.”

In moments, a smile reappeared on Hat Kid’s face.

“I’ll go tell CC to make you lots!”

And with that, the Hat Kid vanished out of her room as fast as her little feet could take her. Snatcher summoned himself a book from thin air-specifically the one he had been reading the previous day- and continued to read right where he had left off.

The ghost had a hard time focusing, however. He couldn’t shake the memory of what had happened to him the previous day. He had thrown up something glowing…and very goopy and blue. If Snatcher didn’t know better, he would have wondered if he were expelling bits of the souls that he consumed. But that wasn’t possible.

After some time, Snatcher started to feel his eyes growing heavy. Snapping his large book shut, he set it down before curling into the blankets. Perhaps taking a nap before getting to indulge in some bacon didn’t sound so bad, after all.

---

When Hat Kid came back into her room, she could hear soft breathing. Snatcher had fallen asleep on the makeshift bed that she had made for him. The girl approached the pile of pillows and the sleeping ghost, and smiled.

She was just happy that he had decided to stay. Seeing him so sick the previous day had scared her half to death, and honestly, so was the strange blue color that the ghost was becoming.

Hat Kid had no doubt in her mind that something had to be wrong with him. He had never been sick as a ghost before…so why was it suddenly happening now?

“Hmm…” Hat Kid hummed as she climbed up into the chair at her desk. Quickly, she pulled out her Dweller Mask from one of the drawers, and put it on. Sliding out from her desk on the chair, she quickly bounded over to Snatcher yet again. However, she was quiet enough to make sure not to wake him.

Once she activated the vision of the Dwellers, she looked all around her room. It was almost as if time itself was flowing strangely. Small green outlines of things that she normally couldn’t see presented themselves on her walls, as always. However, she hadn’t put the mask on simply to look around her room. She was curious about Snatcher.

Maybe, just maybe looking at him with a set of Dwellers’ eyes would teach her something about his condition. She couldn’t be sure, but it was worth a shot.

As she turned the vision of the mask on once again, she stared at the ghost. Immediately, the blue on his face and fingertips appeared to be glowing, but that wasn’t necessarily what was concerning her. What was concerning her, however, was a green circle that appeared to be sitting in his abdomen. Whatever it was, was spiked. It appeared to have grown tendrils, which reached all around inside of the ghost. It almost appeared as if his abdomen was tied up with some sort of awful glowing string.

Hat Kid froze in shock as she stared at the object. What in all the galaxies was it?! As she stared at the object more intently- that’s when it happened. She watched as the strings moved by themselves, pulling themselves tighter around Snatcher.

Ripping off the Dweller Mask, Hat Kid tossed it to the ground with a clatter and let out a shriek.

Snatcher almost immediately snapped awake at the noise.

“Kid…? What are you screaming over there for. I stayed, didn’t I? Shouldn’t you be happy or something?” the ghost sleepily said, scratching at his mane.

Hat Kid simply flailed her arms at the Dweller Mask on the floor, and then at Snatcher, babbling something completely incoherent.

“Hey, Hey! Kiddo, slow down! You’re not even speaking English right now. What? What’s the problem?”

“You--!! I put on the Dweller Mask and looked at you- and Snatcher- there��s something inside you! It’s all wrapped around you! Strings…a-and something round and spiky…!”

[thiswasinevitableid]

Anniversary (Taakitz)

This is my gift for @iamthehelperdog for the @thecandlenightszone 2019 exchange. Also my first time writing this pairing, so I hope it turned out okay!

Kravitz steps through the rift into the living room, enjoying the satisfaction that comes with the days work of a reaper and the drama his profession lends his entrances. 

Said drama is cut very short when his next step sends him stumbling over the largest wolfhound on this or any other realm.

“Ow.” He mutters into the rug, the fanciest one Taako could get his hands on, while the dog snuffles his head. 

“Mango, I swear if he just damaged my bone daddy I’m gonna blast you into the next century. Taako’s in the mood to get dicked down tonight, not take his boyfriend to the fantasy E.R.”

“Sorry Kravitz!” Magnus calls from the general direction of the kitchen before whistling for the hound. 

“It’s fine!” He calls back, standing up and resting his scythe in the holder by the front door (okay, so it’s technically for an umbrella, and the scythe will dematerialize in a matter of moments, but the domesticity of the action makes him smile).

“Nice to see you Magnus. Hello, love.” He pecks Taako’s cheek, not wanting to interrupt his flow as he cooks. It’s hard not to do more; Taako’s wearing the gold and teal skirt that shows off his legs, and his hair is pulled into the kind of messy bun that only he and a few sorority soceresses can make look good. 

“Reap anyone good today bones?” Taako dumps something heavily sage-scented into a dish.

“Nothing too unusual. Though I’m sort of worried that Barry and Lup have created a trend of lich lovers.”

“You mean people wanting to have sex with liches?” Magnus reaches for one of the slices of bread on a nearby tray, only for Taako to whack his hand away with a magically elongated spatula.

“Not quite. It’s more that they think what Barry and Lup did was romantic, even though the process was done as a fail-safe more than anything else. Setting aside the whole “defying the laws of death” issue, that process can backfire so messily that it’s better to head it off when we can.”

“What do they think of the whole thing?”

“Barry’s slightly embarrassed and Lup thinks it’s hilarious and, I suspect, a bit romantic. Even if she’d torch me for suggesting that.”

“You bet you tight skeleton ass she would.” Taako shoos their spectral cat, Dust, from her spot hovering above the counter. 

“So do they get a warning or-”

“It depends, mainly on how likely we think they are to try again.” He goes on to explain the rather star-crossed pair he dealt with that morning, as well as a spectre who was adamant about staying a ghost rather than crossing over. 

At first it feels like any other catch-up night, but as he and Magnus chat, something itches at him like pinfeathers, a sensation he long ago learned to trust. Something isn’t right.

Usually when he’s at the kitchen table, with by himself or with their friends, Taako is a motormouth in motion, chatting away as he cooks. Tonight, his comments are limited. 

Maybe he’s just in a contemplative mood. His boyfriend is allowed time to ruminate just like everyone else. Even if he usually does so out loud. 

But the itching in his marrow doesn’t cease. He looks over at the elf again. He loves watching Taako cook, the way he moves through the kitchen like a dancer on a stage. As he searches his movements, his profile, for some sign and starts going a bit starry-eyed from how beautiful he is, it hits him.

The dogs. 

Taako never lets dogs, Magnus’s or anyone else’s in the kitchen. It’s one of his rules.

Yet here they are, the wolfhound asleep beneath the table and the lab nosing about for dropped food. 

Either his boyfriend is under some sort of mind control spell, or something is wrong.

“Love, I’m going to grab wine for tonight from the cellar. Do you have a preference?” 

“It’s all hearty stuff, since we’ve got brawny here, so something red.”

“Got it. Magnus, would you mind helping me? I want to bring up several options just to be safe.”

“Sure.” Magnus shrugs with a smile and follows Kravitz out of the kitchen and down to the lower level. It’s only once they’re halfway down the cellar, safely out of range of elf-ears, that Kravitz poses his question.

“Does Taako seem off to you tonight?”

“Kinda? He let boys into the kitchen, but I didn’t say anything because I was kind of hoping it means he’s changed his rules. Not that they’ve got to go everywhere with me, but they look so sad waiting for us in the living room.”

“How was he before I got home?” They hit the bottom step, Kravitz scanning the shelves for the right bottle. 

“Normal Taako. We talked about the new floating aquarium Angus made Stephen, he complained about the restaurant down the road...but didn’t say he could make their stuffy a billion times better. Oh, shit.”

Kravtiz starts, nearly drops the bottle, “What?” 

“It’s the 15th, right?”

“Yes…”

“It’s the anniversary of the, y’know” Magnus puts a hand on his throat, making a choking noise. 

“Oh no.” That explains everything. 

“Wait, he never told you?”

Kravitz sighs, leaning against a nearby wine rack, “He’s told me about Glamour Springs, though for obvious reasons it’s not a popular topic. But he never mentioned a date, not that I can remember anyway”

“Hey, it’s okay, I only know it because he once got sloshed on Dwarven ale and told us all about it. Don’t know why Merle always uses Zone of Truth when he could just give people that.” Magnus is trying to lighten to mood, and Kravitz lets him. 

“Might be harder to toss out during a fight.”

“Dunno, I got a pretty good arm.” Magnus grins, takes the two bottles Kravtiz gives him, and leads the way upstairs. 

-------------------------------------

The rest of the evening is perfectly pleasant, Taako seeming ore like himself as they talk over dinner. He even lounges, his preferred mode of rest, feet in Kravtiz’s lap, while Magnus does the dishes. 

As he rubs his feet (and notes that he’ll need to repaint Taako’s toenails soon), he wonders if he should bring up the date. He could let Taako be, let him do whatever he needs to in order to deal with what he’s feeling. 

But what if Kravitz is what he needs, and he’s too haughty to admit it? He can’t bear the thought of being able to help the man he loves feel better and not doing it because he misreads the situation. 

Taako makes it easy on him.

“Alright, bone boy, spill; why did you have Magnus go down to the cellar?” Taako crosses his arms, blocking Kravitz’s path to the dresser (so what he can materialize clothes? Taako bought him some black silk pajamas and he likes looking dapper in them, damn it).

“To help me carry wine. I wanted to bring you a selection.”

Taako arches an eyebrow, “You have one of the best palates for wine of anyone living or dead I know. You didn’t need to grab more than one.”

“Uh, I wanted Magnus’s opinion?”

The eyebrow arches higher.

“Okay, you’re right. I knew that Languedoc would be perfect for the steak pie you made.” He sighs,  sits down on the bed, “I was worried about you, and I wanted to ask Magnus if he was noticing the same things.”

“Worried? Cha’boy is fine.” Taako waves his hand dismissively, “He made a baller dinner and is gonna get boned by his hot boyfriend. What could be wrong?”  He pulls his hair loose from it’s ties, shaking it out in a way that’s almost comically gorgeous. 

“Magnus told me what day it is.” Kravitz says softly. 

Taako sags, tries to recover his glib demeanor only for his disguise to flicker, then disappear entirely. He glances behind himself at the mirror, winces with distaste, turning his Wonderland-aged face back to Kravitz. 

It’s not that Kravitz doesn’t notice the difference between the faces. He simply doesn’t care. Taako is Taako, and Kravitz loves him, and would worship the ground he walks on, no matter what face he wears. 

He holds out his hands and Taako takes them, let’s him guide the elf down to sit beside him. 

“Dove, you don’t need to talk about it if you don’t want to. But you also don’t need to conceal whatever you’re feeling from me. I love you, and I want to help you if you’re hurting.”

“I’d really rather not focus on it. But I got a feeling you’re not gonna let it go.”

“If you need me to drop it, I will. I could also give you something else to focus on.”

Taako glances at him, skeptical, “Like what?”

“Well” Kravitz strands, grabbing a bottle of massage oil from the dresser, “I thought I could make use of my magic fingers.” He wiggles them in the air, making the elf snicker. 

“Sure, go for it.” Taako pulls off his blouse, tossing it on the floor before rolling over on his stomach. Kravitz straddles his hips, rubs the oil  (a warming one, to correct for the chilly skin) on his palms and kneads his fingers gently and precisely across Taako’s back.  

Taako sighs, though all the tension stays put. Kravitz focuses on his task, on the shape of the man beneath him, humming a concerto as he does. 

“So you gonna ask me stuff or…”

“I’m going to massage you. You can talk about whatever you want.”

“What if I wanna talk about what Dust got up to today?”

“That’s fine.” 

Taako huffs, muttering something about difficult birds into the pillow. Kravitz manages to get the knot in his right shoulder loose. 

“....It’s not even about the audience. Not this time, anyway.”

Kravtiz makes a quiet noise to acknowledge that he’s listening. 

“It’s, ugh, it’s Sazed.”

This time Kravitz has to keep his own shoulders from tensing; there are strict instructions that reapers are not allowed to punish souls for personal reasons. But if Sazed ever comes his way in the afterlife, the man is in for an earful (and will still be better off than if he runs into Lup. Goddess help him if that happens). 

“Just...I think of myself as good with people. Everybody loves Taako, y’know but--hoo, yeah, there’s a spot--how the fuck am I supposed to believe that when I misjudged someone so badly?”

“Love, if you gesture like that it makes it hard to rub your arms.”

“Look, bone boy, you wanted me to open up, so I’m opening. I got the wrong read on someone I thought I could trust and forty people died, because he wanted to either frame me or kill me or both and I just, just” the next inhale is shuddery, “what if that happens again?”

“For starters, you have me, and I’m a decent judge of character.” He circles his thumbs along either side of the elf’s spine, gets a moan that’s sweeter than any song to his ears, “and it’s not just me. You have Magnus, and Merle, and Angus, who I’m quite certain will run a thorough background check on anyone he suspects of potentially being a threat to you. And that’s before we even get to Lup.”

“You-” Taako yawns, nestles his head down into a pillow, “you going somewhere with that?”

“When you were making the show, it was mostly you and Sazed. There was no one else who cared about you who could give you perspective, warn you if he seemed twitchy or you seemed too unkind to him. It’s not like that at all now. You have many people who care about you Taako, present company included.” He leans forward, kissing the back of the elf’s head.

“You do more than care, my man” the tease is back in voice, and Kravtiz is relieved to hear it. Narrow hips twitch under him as Taako adds, “could do more than that right now if you wan-” another yawn and Kravitz laughs, rolling off of him. 

“Raincheck until the morning, my dove? I do like when you go melty and relaxed when we fuck, but you look ready to drop.”

“Fiiiiiiiiiiine.” Taako huffs, crawls, and flops his way under the covers while the reaper washes his hands. Hops under the covers himself, Taako glomming onto him as soon as he’s within range. He switches off the light, cuddling the elf close. 

“Hey, bones?”

“Yes, my love?”

“Thank you. For, um, for listening. And for not pushing it.”

Kravitz brushes golden wisps of hair aside, kissing him tenderly and as long as he can before the elf needs to pull away.

“Any time, dove. Any time.”

[artofabeginner]

The Totally Not Normal Train Station

There is something to be said about the aura in a train station. People bustling to and from different places, unaware of how time stands still as they wait. There is something to be said about the people that use the train station located on E. Federal Dr. They are the type of people who care little for the rules of the universe or the rules of time.

For example, see that man with the extremely tall top hat? The one who looks like he came out of the 1850′s? His name is Michael Kain, he is not in fact from the 1850′s. He is from the 2080′s. Shocker right. Don’t worry, top hats don’t come back into fashion. He’s on his way to a convention. 

Don't look shocked, here. Look at that woman in the sun dress, now I know what you are thinking, “Why is she wearing a sundress on this cold and chilly winter day.” It's because it’s not. In fact, she is currently living in last summer. I think she's on her way to meet her date.  How do I know? Look at the date on her ticket and the flowers in her other hand. Spooky right? Not really, I know her. She likes  to relive this one, not entirely sure why.

  Look at that child over there. The boy with the blonde hair and the blue eyes, who is currently wearing a red striped shirt and jeans. You didn’t notice him before? No shocker there, that's the point. His job is to look as generic as possible. Why? I just told you, it's his job. 

  Now look at that dog over there, isn’t it cute? No nothing is wrong with the dog, it's just a dog I wanted to point out, sheesh. Now that alley cat over there, that ain’t no cat. Look at it closely, look at its fur, how it flickers in and out of sight? How it glides through the shadows, how no one notices it as it curls through their legs. It's familiar of course. And if there is a familiar there's a witch! 

Look at that man over there, he is the only one who acknowledges it. What do you mean how do I know! Look at him, he keeps peering towards it as he reads that newspaper upside down, he is clearly the witch. Look at his bag, can you see the herbs poking out? Don’t worry, it's basil. Stop freaking out, Basil is used for protection, which he so clearly needs.

Ugh, look behind him, that man in the shadows, it’s a federal agent. Oh, come now, did you really think the feds wouldn’t be looking for him? What for? For magic use obviously! Of course, it's a bit too late for a protective spell, can’t do much against the law I suppose. 

Now that woman over there is interesting, I’m not 100% sure what she is. I mean there are so many different races it's hard to keep track! No, stupid. I’m not talking about human races; I’m talking about aliens. She could be a martin, but they don’t usually appear as a woman. Although, that would be the greatest disguise. 

Now, now. Ignore her, she isn’t looking for trouble, that person in the corner, by those trash cans, now they're looking for some trouble. In fact, from the looks of it, they're about to start a fight with the woman standing next to them. Of course, that won’t do anything, seeing as she's a ghost and last I checked you can't punch a ghost. Believe me.

Oh, here comes the train. No, don’t get on. It’s not ours, it's theirs. You clearly haven’t been here before. There are multiple trains that go through this station some are for us, and some are for the others. This one in particular houses the circus. No not a circus, THE circus. That woman in the corner is going to get on, so is that man near the stairs. It’s funny though, seeing as they are on opposing sides, of course THE train is the only place they will get any privacy! Star crossed lovers obviously. It's like you've never been in love with the killer clown of the opposite circus, whose leader is a master sorcerer who is threatening to kill your mother. 

Oh, Look at that woman who's just come down the stairs. Her name is Emily Van Weber. She runs this train station. She is very powerful, so I wouldn’t talk to her. Of course, she is powerful, her last name is Weber? As in of the Weber family? As in the world best time weavers? Wanna know something funny? She was supposed to take over the family business, but then she took a trip to Venus and fell in love with this alien who I believes’ human name is Ken, so she ditched everything and made a bunch of  underground, illegal train stations, like this one, who defy the laws of time and space. She is technically wanted by the entire galaxy. She also runs an underground bunny smuggling operation. Yeah yeah, keep laughing, but there are times and places that don’t have bunnies and will pay a lot for some.

Now that man next to her is definitely not Ken. I think he’s Alexander Murdoch. The future president. Don’t worry, you won’t live to see him rule. He's super corrupt, but like he’s chill with the place existing, so long as we hook him up with 1920’s dishwashers. Hey! It's actually the most smuggled item in his time, you can make a load of money, and it's super illegal. Like “punished by death” illegal. Eh, I'm not sure why, I don't take trips to his time often, it's quite boring really, and by this time the protests have quieted and the people are complacent, which is clearly no fun.

Don’t look down trodden. Here, look at this badge. Yes, I know it looks worthless, but it's from a rebel group a couple of years after his “death”, don't question the quotation marks, and I am a part of it. They totally tear down the government and like it's pretty dope. Why wouldn’t I be? It's a rebellion!  

Alright, quiet down, I want to hear their conversation. Well I want to know what type of dishwasher he’s looking for, so I can get it first. I'm going to sell it to him obviously. Ugh, okay so here's how the deal between them works, she doesn't need to get it for him, but as long as someone who works or uses the trains sells it to him then it's fine. Don't be like that, I am a part of the rebellion, I am also making money on the side. Yeah, it's a bit manipulative, but it's not like the rebels know about this place, besides we’ve tried to start a rebellion sooner, but there is only so much one can change.

Is that... Oh crap, Stand in front of me. No not like that, like this. Now don’t look at me, it'll blow my cover.  That woman over there, the one who just showed up, the one in the wedding dress. We aren't on great terms, in fact most of the people here aren't on good terms with her. She is probably going to her wedding, or well one of them at least. She is literally married to someone in each era. It keeps her cover up. She is looking for a way to bring her true love back. Doesn't seem hard I know, considering time means nothing in these parts. But here's the thing, her love doesn’t exist. Okay, okay, wait till she leaves and I’ll explain.

Did she get on the train? Good. That means she's headed for the 80’s, interesting.  Anyway, like her love used to exist, but then she was caught committing this suuuper bad crime, so they uncreated her? I can't tell you what she did, just that I helped catch her. Which, in hindsight I feel bad for, considering I kind of agree with her. But that's not important anymore, she can't be brought back because she no longer exists. Don't look so scared, you wouldn't even be able to commit the kinda crime that would get you uncreated, your body literally would not survive it.

On another note, have you seen that man that was standing at the stairwell, when she came in? He entered the train? Great, just great. Well I was supposed to meet him a couple years ago, thought I would explain myself to him, but seeing as he's already popped into the 80’s and I really don't like the 80’s, I’ll see him some other time. No, the 1980′s are fine, in talking about the 3080′s. It's kind of a mess. Don’t worry about it, just some mega virus turning people into mindless pigs. Eh, they figure it out, but y'know, a lot of people get sick, and I really can't deal with it. 

Welp. Guess that's that. Where am I going? Nowhere, you’re leaving. Well, your train is here, and you have to go. Tell you what, if you find this place again, I’ll be waiting. I’ll tell you more next time. But for now, you have to go. Or else, you'll be here for another couple hours, and you don't have that kind of time. Heh, time.  Hurry the trains going to leave!

Goodbye! See you in a couple of years! Stay away from milk, trust me! Also stay away from your parrot. Oh, did I say that out loud?  Don’t worry about it! Bye!

As I said before, there something about the train station on E. Federal Dr. Just like there is something about the train Station on SW. Kentucky RD. Or on NE. Venusian St. It’s not the fact that technically these streets don't exist or that the train station cannot be found by those who don't deserve to find it. But rather. it's about those who are considered worthy of it that really make the place what it is. I mean, who decides that a smuggler, a ghost, a killer clown, a spy, an alien, and you are all worthy? The aura of this place, an aura filled with the weirdest of things, time and space and hope and power and love and hate. This aura that shouldn't exist, but does. It is the aura of the worthy, and only those who understand that enter.

[thewhumperinwhite]

Café: Treetops

Previous: Teaser 1, Teaser 2, Hospital/Squad Car, Empty Bar, Used Car Lot 1, Used Car Lot 2, Gas Station, Roadside 1, Roadside 2, Forest

TW for: illness/fever, mention of decapitation/murder, smoking mention, very lightly implied parental neglect, Thing That Seems Like Deadnaming For A Second But Take This As My Personal Guarantee That Sol’s Deadname Will Never Be Said Out Loud In This Story.

Also i’m not gonna check but i think this might be the first chapter where Sol smiles? so look forward to that.

@whumpitywhumpwhump

----

Rainwater is dripping from Sol’s hair down the bridge of his nose and soaking into his shirt collar, even though if you asked him five minutes ago he’d have told you his poor abused work shirt had absorbed literally all the liquid it could physically hold. 

“Just for the record,” Kent says in a slightly breathless voice, “when I used the phrase ‘huddled in trees,’ that was sarcasm.”

Sol thinks about rolling his eyes, but given that nobody would see it from this angle, he doesn’t bother and just leaves his eyes closed instead.

“Funny,” Pax snaps, sounding, at least, no longer pretend-cheerful. “When I told you to shut the fuck up, I was serious.” Sol can hear them shifting, but doesn’t turn to look, partly because he does not care and partly because he thinks he might fall out of the tree if he tries.

“I think you should both shut up,” he says flatly, knowing he’s wasting his fucking breath.

It does earn him almost a full minute of silence, which is a step up, technically.

“The bleeders are too clumsy to climb trees,” Pax says testily, apparently unable to help themself. “Therefore, being the wonderful, coordinated living beings that we are, we are taking advantage of that weakness.”

“I know that,” Kent says, also sounding slightly testy, but even more tired and kind of in pain. “I am aware of the logic, but I gotta say that I am not feeling super coordinated at the moment.”

“I know that,” Sol growls. “I was the one who had to help you up, and since we are all fuckin’ exhausted from that little ordeal, how about we all just go the fuck to sleep, huh?”

Kent makes a noise that is probably supposed to convey irritation but just sounds sort of— pathetic. “I can’t sleep. I don’t understand how either of you can sleep when it’s so hot up here.”

Sol blinks his eyes open. That— does not sound like a great sign.

Careful not to overbalance and throw himself off the narrow branch currently supporting his ass, Sol cranes around the trunk of the tree to squint through the driving rain at Kent, who is leaning back against the tree with his eyes closed. Sol half-carried him up this bigass goddamn tree and set him with more care than he wants to admit in the stablest position he could find, at the fork of two large branches, but at the moment his perch there looks kind of precarious.

Checking to see that Paxon, on the opposite side and several branches higher than either himself of Kent, probably can’t see— not that he cares what they think— he leans carefully forward to lay his wrist against Kent’s forehead. It’s hard to be sure of anything when the freezing rain has turned his hands and arms into icicles, but the heat coming off Kent’s face almost makes him jump.

“Aw, great,” he mumbles, grabbing hold of his own branch so he can lean forward a little more to examine Kent’s face, which, now that he’s looking, does have kind of a greenish cast to it. “Hey, man,” he says softly, giving Kent a gentle poke on a part of his cheekbone that doesn’t seem to be bruised yet. “How ya feeling?”

Without opening his eyes, Kent heaves a tired sigh that turns halfway through into a cough. Sol freezes like a popsicle, going very quickly back over the last several hours to try and determine whether one of the bleeders could possibly have bitten him without Sol noticing— but Kent’s brief coughing fit fails to bring up any red-flecked phlegm, so Sol tries to reel in his panic. He doesn’t sound crazy, anyway— just sick. 

“Not very good,” Kent croaks, letting his eyes drift open. They look kinda glassy, but Sol sees with knee-weakening relief that they are not particularly bloodshot. “Too warm. And also shivery.”

“I fuckin’ bet,” Sol says. “You look like microwaved dogshit, dude.”

Sol chews his lip, something uncomfortably close to worry churning in his stomach. When he doesn’t move away, Kent laughs faintly, though it turns into a cough at the end.

“You sure you want to get that close?” he asks, smiling a little, though it doesn’t come close to reaching his eyes. Sol doesn’t think Kent’s smiles usually do, actually.

Sol blinks. “Huh?”

“Aren’t you worried I’ll suddenly decide to take a bite out of your arm?” Kent says, and it sounds like it’s trying to be a joke but isn’t quite making it.

Sol stares at him for a second. Then he snorts.

“Please,” Sol says, smirking. “You? I could definitely take you, crazy or not, you fucking stick. Besides, look.” Sol fishes around in the pockets of his sopping-wet jacket, ignoring Kent’s look of utter confusion.

His lighter is freezing and dripping wet, and who knows if it’ll still work as an actual lighter after this, but it makes a serviceable mirror, in a pinch. He holds it up so that Kent is blinking into his own wide blue eyes.

“See?” Sol says, and is surprised at the softness of his own voice. “Not a drop of blood in sight, man. You’re probably just feverish from running around in the mud with open cuts and stuff.”

“Heartening,” Kent says, reaching up to change the angle of Sol’s grip.

“That’s what I’m here for,” Sol says, smirking.

And then Sol suddenly realizes that Kent’s hand is wrapped loosely around his own, and is horrified to feel his own cheeks heating up, which is--so fucking stupid.

“Who’s ‘Rina’?” he asks curiously, blinking down at the lighter, and Sol starts badly, jerking his hand away like Kent’s question burns his fingers.

“No one,” he barks, shoving the lighter back into his pocket, leaving Kent with his hand still outstretched and lips parted slightly in surprise.

“Oh,” Kent says, blinking. “Uh, sorry, I didn’t mean to— “ He pulls back, looking carefully anywhere but at Sol’s face. “Sorry.”

Sol stares at Kent. Kent stares at the unnervingly-far-away ground.

Goddammit, it’s like kicking a puppy.

“Ugh,” Sol growls, running a hand through his hair. “Look, fine, whatever, don’t look at me like that— Karine is my little sister, okay? She always hated it when I smoked, so she used to steal my lighter all the time. That’s why it’s— that’s why.”

He had been very mad at the time, in high school at some point, when he had finally wrestled his lighter back from her— after almost a week of searching and shouting half-hearted threats at her when their father wasn’t home, which was often— only to find that she had scratched Sol Sux Shit on one side and her own big girly signature on the other, with a big fucking heart around it. He didn’t talk to her for a few days after that.

He didn’t throw the lighter away, though, either. That was junior year, or thereabouts; he’d been Sol for a short enough time that seeing the name scratched permanently into metal was--something, even if it was followed by the words “sux shit.”

It’s been— Christ, almost four years since he’s seen her, which means she’s all grown up and definitely has at least two boyfriends by now. That thought makes him unconsciously ball up his fists, and then he’s distracted by the sound of Kent laughing at him.

“Wha— what are you laughing at?” Goddammit, is he blushing again?

“I’m s-sorry,” Kent says, amid honest-to-god giggles. “I-it’s just— your face—!”

Sol just barely resists the urge to cover his cheeks, trying to will the heat back out of them. “Sh-shut up, I was just—” He pulls up short. “H-hey— are you okay?”

Kent is doubled up with hard, damp-sounding coughs, so much so that Sol has to dart out a hand to keep him from falling forward off the branch.

“Kent— hey—”

As he’s readjusting himself to hold up Kent’s weight without falling off his own branch, there’s a rustling in the branches above them, and Paxon Field drops abruptly onto the end of Kent’s branch, like an enormous pink cat.

“Let me see your hand,” they say sharply. When Kent doesn’t immediately respond, they reach forward to tug his hand away from his face.

“Hey!” Sol snaps, trying to shove them back, “what the hell are you—”

“Shut up,” Pax says, turning Kent’s hand over so they can examine both sides. Finding no blood on it, they relax, their hand sliding off the hilt of their sword.

“Idiot,” they say, not unkindly, and reach up to lay their wrist against Kent’s forehead. Kent, his coughing fit finally starting to subside, lets them, his weight pressing into Sol’s chest in a way that is— neither embarrassing nor pleasant but in fact entirely neutral, fuck you. Pax sighs. “You’re burning up, you dumbass.”

“That’s not exactly his fault,” Sol snaps, to his own surprise more than anyone else’s. Pax raises their eyebrows at him. Kent’s eyes flutter shut. “Well,” Sol goes on, into Pax’s surprised stare. “We’ve been wandering around in the rain for a long time. He’s got— broken bones and stuff.”

Paxon gives Sol a look he can’t quite read, and then frowns down at Kent, whose cheek now sits just under Sol’s collarbone, like coughing has used up all his remaining energy. “How long have you been feelin’ the shivers, sunshine?” they bark.

Grumbling like an annoyed child, Kent turns away from Paxon, which involves burying his face against the sodden front of Sol’s shirt. Sol freezes, a violent electrical current making its way up his spine. When Kent mumbles his answer (which is unintelligible but seems to contain the words “the car”), Sol can feel his lips move against his chest, and would readjust if he could move. ...probably.

“Then it’s entirely your fault, you daft idiot,” Paxon snaps, annoyed. “Why the hell didn’t you say anything?”

Kent turns back, opening one blue eye. “I suppose,” he says coldly, “I was worried you’d decapitate me.”

Paxon, to Sol’s surprise, starts like they’ve been hit. There’s a very awkward silence. Sol is afflicted with a bizarre desire to laugh.

Then Paxon growls, long and low, and starts their descent out of the tree.

“Uh,” Sol calls after them. “Where are you going?”

“To get sunshine some medicine, I guess,” they shout back, bitterly. “Since neither of you is in any way equipped for survival, apparently.”

Sol stares down at the top of their head as they make their weirdly nimble way down out of the tree. Then he looks down at Kent, who is also frowning down at Paxon’s retreating form.

“Someone should go with them,” Kent mutters.

Sol shifts uncomfortably. “You can’t stay in this tree by yourself.”

An embarrassed flush makes its way into Kent’s pale cheeks, and he shoots Sol an apologetic look from under his lashes. Sol’s brain stops working for a second and he misses what Kent says next, but makes an educated guess that it’s some variation of “sorry for the trouble.”

“Don’t be dumb,” he says, biting his lip.

Sol runs through their options in his head, and from the unhappy look on Kent’s face he suspects the blonde is doing the same.

“Fuck,” Sol mutters, and then, making sure Kent has a firm grip on the tree trunk to go with the confused look on his face, turns himself very carefully around on his own branch so his back is to Kent, the blonde’s bony knees digging into his back slightly.

“Um,” Kent says.

“Shut up,” Sol snaps. “Put your arms around my shoulders. Try not to choke me or we will both fall and die.”

“Um,” says Kent.

Sol takes a moment to bury his rapidly-reddening face in his hands and groan because why does shit like this keep happening to him. “Paxon shouldn’t go by themself, and you can’t stay here or climb down. This is the only fucking solution, okay? I don’t like it anymore than you do, so shut up and get on.”

There’s another terrible silence, which Sol uses to pray to anybody who might be listening to give him a fucking break already.

Moving carefully, like he’s waiting for Sol to stop him, Kent slides his slim arms around Sol’s shoulders, knitting his fingers together around Sol’s chest and being careful to avoid his windpipe. After a moment’s hesitation, he moves closer, awkwardly scooting forward so his legs are wrapped around Sol’s waist.

Sol, very aware of Kent’s chest and biceps and thighs, clears his throat loudly.

“Okay,” he says, trying his very best to sound businesslike. “I need my hands to do the tree-climbing thing, so hold on, yeah?”

Sol can feel the heat coming off of Kent’s face where it’s buried against his shoulder even through the thick wool of his jacket, though he can’t tell how much of that is the fever and how much is embarrassment roughly equivalent— if there is a loving god— to his own.

“Yeah,” Kent mumbles miserably into Sol’s jacket. Sol feels a slightly insane giggle building in his chest. 

“Okay,” Sol says slowly. “I am now moving to the next branch over. You good?”

“Perfect,” Kent says in a very muffled voice, and shifts slightly against Sol’s back. Sol clears his throat again, and reaches out for the next branch, shifting so that he’s carrying most of Kent’s weight.

“Christ, do you ever eat?” he says before they can stop himself. God, maybe they will make it to the ground, after all. “My sister’s cat weighs more than you.”

Kent, his face very warm indeed, chooses not to respond. In fact, he keeps his mouth mercifully shut for almost the whole awkward, painful climb down, and Sol’s left foot is actually on solid ground when he finally mumbles, so low Sol can’t be entirely sure of the words, “Thanks, Sol. You’re wonderful.”

Sol freezes with one foot still on the lowest branch, feeling an unfamiliar sort of heat spreading in the center of his chest. Before he can stop it, his mouth twitches into something that feels suspiciously like a grin.

The feeling fades pretty quickly when he turns and sees the color Pax is turning from trying to hold in their amusement. Seeing Sol’s fiery glare and immediate, violent blush, they give up and throw their head back, sending bright peals of laughter up into the still-raining sky.

Sol bristles, his hands tightening under Kent’s thighs. “Sh-shut up! Don’t— don’t laugh at me!”

Pax laughs hard, holding their stomach. “Your face!” they crow delightedly. “You’re turning purple, babe!”

Sol’s blush doesn’t get any worse, but probably only because there’s no more blood left in the rest of him. “Shut up!” he squawks. “It’s your fault for leaving us up there, anyway!”

Pax shakes their head, grinning. “I didn’t say you had to come with me,” they point out. 

“Kent didn’t want you wandering off by yourself,” Sol snaps, looking over his shoulder. “Did y— oh.”

Kent, his lips slightly parted and rain making his long lashes sparkle a little in the moonlight, has rested his head against Sol’s shoulder and is breathing long and steady, his breath making faint snuffling noises through his broken nose.

Sol stares a little.

“What’s up with sunshine?” Paxon says, a trace of worry in their voice. “He’s not dead, is he?”

“No,” Sol says, a confused smile spreading over his face. “I think he’s fallen asleep.” Looking carefully anywhere but at Paxon’s stupid smug grin, he clears his throat. “Let’s just go. I’ll carry him. He isn’t heavy.”

[wolfie-posts]

Kiss and Run Ch.2

Bakugou Katsuki x Female!Reader

Read Chapter 1 here

Author: @wolfie-posts

Warning: language

Chapter length: 7,920 words

Story Summary:

You did it! You were given the opportunity to study at U.A. alongside class 1A to become a pro-hero. Within the next three years, you were gonna learn more about yourself and your special quirk, about friendship, about fighting, winning and losing. The road to your goal is bumpy and steep with a lot of obstacles like villains and an explosive blond boy, who decided to make your life a little harder. Will you finally be able to control your quirk? Will you overcome the problems together with your classmates along the way?

A/N: Hello lovelies, I hope you enjoy the new chapter, it’s way longer than the first one and I hope to keep the chapter-length up like that. Also a special thanks to @plus-ultra-me for helping me, without you this wouldn’t have been possible!

AO3

Quotev

Wattpad

________________________________________

"This is it" you muttered looking down at the letter from U.A. You were holding the letter very carefully in your hands as if it would break if you held it too tight. You weren’t the only one looking anxiously at the letter, your parents were nervous wrecks with identical tense grimaces plastered over their faces, not able to peel their eyes off the letter in front of them.

"What are you waiting for? Open it!" they spoke at the same time, simultaneously breaking the silence. Their voices were a little bit louder than normal and you could clearly hear the excitement and worry in them.

"If you ehm.. don't mind, I would.. rather open it in private," you exclaimed quietly, gulping down the lump in your throat. You couldn't bring yourself to meet your parent's eyes while saying that, knowing they shared the thrill of anticipation with you.

The importance of this letter made your chest heavy and clouded your head, sending your thoughts running wild.

'What if I didn't make it?

How will I be able to control my power then?

What if.. what if I’m too weak...

What if all my effort was for  nothing?'

Frozen into place, the color drained from your parents’ faces when you told them you wanted to be left alone. A pale and empathic look now replacing the grimaces.

"O-Of course sweetie! I’m sorry.. w-we got kinda carried away there." your mother said with a soft and kind voice, giving you a reassuring smile.

"Take your time kiddo. You can tell us when you are ready. Just know that we love you and we are really proud of you, no matter what that letter says!" your dad added and patted your head affectionately.

Entering your room, you closed the door quietly behind you and took a seat at your desk, the letter still in hand. 

For about five minutes you just stared at it, anticipation and fear gnawing at your insides. You were scared, even though you had a good feeling about how the entrance exam went. Not knowing what the letter said just seemed a lot better at the moment because right now it could be a yes or no, the second you open the letter your future would be decided. With shaking hands, you were mentally preparing for the worst-case scenario.

"Here goes nothing" you whispered, ripping open the letter and revealing a small technical device that dropped onto your desk and lit up the whole room.

"Hello Y/N L/N, I am here as a projection. I came back to town to teach at U.A. So now I have the honor of telling you that you passed the written and practical exam to get into U.A. You got 40 villain points but it wasn't only graded on those. How can a hero course not include the fact that some people saved others and risked their lives to do the right thing? That is why you also gained rescue points." All Might explained to you with his signature smile.

Jaw drop.

The projection showed the examination results of all the contestants that made it into U.A. You couldn't believe your eyes when you saw your name at the ranking list. You were actually shared first place with somebody else, having both gained 77 points in total.

"Congratulations on making it into U.A. I can't wait to teach you!"  Just like that, the projection ended with All Might giving you a brilliant and shining smile with a thumbs up.

"W-Wait... WHAT?!" you stuttered while yelling, not believing what had just happened. Tears started to well up in the corner of your eyes.

"I-I did it.." you mumbled, realization slowly kicking in.

"HOLY SHIT! MOM, DAD, I DID IT! I GOT IN!" you yelled, a wave of emotions crashing over you.

It didn't even take three seconds before your parents kicked in the door and tackled you with a hug. You knew they were impatiently waiting in front of your door but who could blame them. Having them nearly suffocate you with their love just made this situation all the more real. You didn't know if you were laughing or crying anymore. A muffled sound from above made you look up to see their faces.

After that amazing news they just couldn't hold back anymore, happy tears were streaming down their faces. For strangers, this surely would have been a rare and weird sight, three people hugging each other while bawling their eyes out but even so, you wouldn't have it any other way.

'I will finally be able to be a hero and learn how to make good use of my powers!'

----First day at U.A.----

You were late. Not only late but like really fucking late for your first day at U.A. 'How could this happen?!' you thought while running down the sidewalk.

"Ugh, why did this have to happen to me on such an important day?!" you whined, underneath your breath, picking up your speed when the school entrance came into sight.

Your eyes were all over the place searching for room 1-A when you finally arrived at your new school.

"Found it!" Without hesitation, you slammed open the door and rushed in. There was no time for worrying about having everybody's eyes on you the moment you set foot into the classroom. Your breathing was heavy, cheeks pink from sprinting all this way to school. Small drops of sweat were forming on your forehead.

"SORRY I AM LATE THERE WAS A STRAY CAT AND A HOMELESS GUY TRIED TO TAKE-" you bowed deeply but before you could even finish your rambling, you could hear a chair squeak followed by a terrifying voice.

"YOU!" a familiar blond boy yelled, although it was more like a terrifying roar, making you tense up immediately.

'Oh fuck' was all you could think, stammering out a trembling and intimidated "Me", knowing damn well you were screwed.

"I AM GOING TO KILL Y-"

"Sit down Bakugou, class has already started." the teacher interrupted the boy nonchalantly, who was about to blow up the whole classroom.

Bakugou obediently sat back down but not without glowering at you. You never would have thought that he was the kind of guy to listen to what the teacher had to say. His crimson eyes shone with murderous intent and send a shiver down your spine. Mumbling something inaudible, the teacher's attention turned back to you and he gave you an unimpressed look.

"You must be Y/N L/N then. It's fine just sit down," he said with a blank stare.

"Yes Sir," you said, bowing apologetically once more but when you stood up straight again your head was hanging a little lower.

'What a great start' you thought sarcastically to yourself and went to sit down at the only unoccupied seat, clutching your bag protectively to your chest.

"Time is precious, rational students would understand that. Anyways, I am Shota Aizawa your homeroom teacher. Let's get right to it, we have wasted enough time already." he said pulling something out of his sleeping bag.

'Why the hell does he have a sleeping bag with him? I mean he does kinda look worn out but he is a pro-hero, right? I probably shouldn't judge a book by its cover'

Your train of thought got interrupted by the thing Aizawa pulled out from his yellow bag.

"Put these on and head outside," he said with a kind of fed up and bored voice. In his hand was a typical U.A. sports uniform in blue with red and white detailing, you had seen those before on television at the annual sports tournament.

After changing, you and your classmates all meet outside on the training ground.

"Everyone here? Great, let's get started with the quirk assessment test." Aizawa announced, leaving you all in shock.

"What? A quirk assessment test?" you all blurt out in sync. The first one to really speak up was a cute girl with brown hair and pink cheeks.

"But orientation! We're gonna miss it." she said with a sad undertone to her voice, expressing what you all felt and thought.

"If you want to make it in the big leagues you can't waste time on pointless ceremonies." your teacher silenced the girl and anyone else who thought about speaking up.

You all gasped, taken aback from the harsh but true words your homeroom teacher was saying.

"Here at U.A., we are not tethered to traditions. That means that I get to run my class however I see fit. You have been taking standardized tests for most of your life but you never got to use your quirks in physical exams before. The country is still trying to pretend we are all created equal by not letting those with the most power excel. It’s not rational. One day the Ministry of Education will learn. Bakugou, you and a... classmate... managed to get the most points on the entrance exam. Please step forward." A familiar ash blond boy stepped to the front, fists, and jaw clenched with a dark vibe spreading around him as he waited for the teacher to move on.

"In junior high, what was your best result for the softball throw?" Aizawa asked looking straight at him.

"67 meters I think," Bakugou replied, his eyes still fierce and brows knitted.

"Right, try doing it with your quirk. Anything goes, just stay in the circle. Go on." Aizawa said impatiently.

"Alright man, you asked for it!" Bakugou said cockily while stretching his throw-arm. He picked up one of the balls that were laying to the side. As he took in his stance, you could see the determination in his crimson eyes, which sent a weird jolt through your body.

The moment Bakugou let go of the ball a terrifying "DIE" escaped his lips, sending the ball flying off with an explosion, where the eye couldn't follow anymore.

"D-Did he just yell 'die'?" you stuttered looking at the green-haired boy next to you, who looked as frightened as you did.

"I-I think so,” he said with a pale face.

'Oh god... what have I gotten myself into?' you thought, facepalming yourself internally.

"All of you need to know your maximum capabilities. It's the most rational way of figuring out your potential as a pro-hero." your teacher said, holding up a device that measured the distance from the throw.

You gulped down hard when you saw the numbers on the screen. 'Fucking 705.2 meters' A boy behind you was just as impressed as you, although probably everybody was impressed by that quirk.

"Wow, 705.2 meters? Are you kidding me?" the guy said, disturbed but still fascinated.

Everybody started to get hyped up. You could hear them excitedly talk about how they were gonna kill it in the test but you weren't so happy. Sure your physical abilities were outstanding, better than average kids but how were you gonna keep up with quirks like firecrackers over there?

"So this looks fun, huh?" Aizawa broke up the happy chattering. "You have three years here to become a hero. Do you think it's all gonna be games and playtime? Idiots. Today you will compete in 8 physical tests to see how much potential you have. Whoever comes in last has none and will be expelled immediately."

Nearly everyone's jaw dropped. All around you, you could see the shock and worry written over their faces. Scanning the crowd you caught a glimpse of the guy Bakugou and your stomach dropped, even more, seeing him grinning evilly.

"I should have figured you would like this" you mumbled to yourself, rolling your eyes and clenching your jaw, feeling your palms getting sweaty. Why were you even scared? You had great chances of doing well on this test. You maybe wouldn't come out on top again like in the entrance exam but you surely wouldn't get cut.

"As I said, I get to decide how this class runs, understand? If that's a problem you can head home right now." This sure was a weird way of pep-talking you into doing your best. Pink-cheeks was the first one to speak up again. 'Damn this girl has balls' you thought, while mentally making a note to befriend her. It wouldn't be bad to have someone like her on your good side.

"You can't send one of us home. I mean, we just got here. Even if it wasn't our first day, it still wouldn’t be fair! " Pink-cheeks was just again stating what you were all feeling but you realized it was useless. Aizawa just said that he makes the rules so you weren't gonna give him a reason to kick you out right on the sport for speaking up. You glanced over to Pink-cheeks who was pouting and puffing her cheeks in frustration.

'Being so adorable is gonna be her downfall. Honestly, if she didn’t look so innocent, I'd probably be scared of her' you thought, staring at the short girl. Aizawa's voice snapped you out of your thoughts as he started to speak again.

"Oh, and you think natural disasters are? Or power-hungry villains hmm? Or catastrophic accidents that wipe out whole cities? No! The world is full of unfairness. It's a hero's job to try to reduce that unfairness. If you wanna be a pro you have to push yourself to the brink. For the next three years, U.A. will throw one terrible hardship after another at you. So go beyond, plus ultra style! Show me it's no mistake that you are here!" That intimidation and scary pep-talk created a change in atmosphere. Everybody was getting hyped again and their faces had a look of determination on them as if they were ready to take on the world.

"Now then, we are just wasting time by talking. Let the games begin."

The first test was a 50-meter dash. Engine-calves and frog-girl had the honor of starting you off into the test. It was the first time seeing everybody's quirk in action. There wasn't much time for you to notice them during the entrance exam, so this was actually pretty interesting for you. You saw the next group getting ready for the dash and recognized the adorable pink-cheeked girl. Eyeing her closely you could see her touch her clothes while getting ready to run. She finished at 7.15 seconds, which was pretty good. You wanted to tell her that yet your words got caught in your throat, and a small voice inside your head reminded you that this was a competition.

They all had amazing test results but one obviously stood out: Bakugou straight-up fired himself over the finish line within 4.13 seconds.

"Damn, guess those explosions really work for him" you laughed to yourself, getting the attention of the girl next to you.

"Somebody has already an eye on someone, I see," she giggled. "It seems like we’re up next, the name is Mina Ashido." the pink alien girl said with a bright smile holding out her hand.

You gladly took it and returned the smile. "Don't mistake my disliking for a crush." you laughed, "Blasty and I became sworn enemies before I even knew his name but nevertheless, nice to meet you too. My name is Y/N L/N but you can just call me by my first name." the pink girl had such a bubbly personality, it brought up your mood right away, replacing your frown with a bright smile.

"Haha, I know who you are. It's hard not to since you were like totally late today and got the highest score on the entrance exam. Just don't get too confident, I am still gonna kick your ass." she winked and got ready at the start line.

"You better keep your word then," you said with a grin getting down into position. The robot on the finish line started to countdown and as the start signal rang through your ears you started off into a mad dash but only after three seconds you could see Ashido skating ahead of you in the corner of your eyes. She crossed the finish line at 5.35 and you followed close by 6.61.

"Told you I'd beat ya" she smiled confidently and struck a pose, you couldn't help but laugh at that sight, that girl just made you drop your guard without even trying. "Atta girl" you high fived her and went to the others who had already finished the first test.

"I really thought you would be more arrogant and bitchy. I totally misjudged you. I’m sorry." Ashido said while standing next to you, scratching the back of her head.

"Well, I just got lucky on the entrance exam. My quirk isn't that—" but you cut yourself off, not wanting to reveal too much about your quirk. "I mean, my dad can manipulate anything that has a technical circuit so you know, I manage." you smiled awkwardly back at her.

"You didn't have to justify it but I appreciate it. Let's just hope we both get through today because you and I are gonna be besties from now on!" she giggled and threw her arm around your shoulder.

The next test was grip strength and due to your enhanced physical abilities, you did pretty good in comparison to the kids who didn't have a mutation or physical enhancement as an advantage. One guy even got 540 kilograms which send your thoughts running off again, imagining being crushed in a six-armed hug by that guy. Although maybe that actually made his hugging skills superb.

Test number three was the standing long jump, which was a little harder with no special quirk. You were talking with Ashido and some of your other classmates waiting for your turn when Bakugou rammed his shoulder into you, causing you to lose your balance and land on your ass. "What the—" Before you could even finish your surprised and pained shriek, a growl cut you off.

"YOU’RE IN MY WAY, SHITFACE!" your mouth was ajar, you couldn’t get to terms with how rude that guy was.

"You know, you could’ve just gone the other way..." you quietly mumbled back at him, brushing the dirt from your sports uniform. Bakugou simply didn't care about what you had to say but he surely didn't expect you to go all quiet on him, which made him even more furious. He walked off, infuriated by your presence alone not giving you a second glance.

"What an ass!" you heard the group in unison say but you waved them off. There was no need for them to get involved even though you appreciated regardless..

"It's fine guys, I can handle him. I mean it's my fault, to begin with," you said, mumbling the last part a bit. You scratched the back of your head trying to hide your discomfort about this situation. 

"I kinda got in his way during the entrance exam and well, I guess he blames me for not getting more points. I just really wish we could leave that behind us it's kinda exhausting and it's only been a day. Maybe I should just apologize..." a laugh escaped your mouth, it sounded weird but you just wanted to cover up the sadness you were feeling. You really didn't want to be anyone's enemy. You never intended to do anything bad. Trying to push away the sickening feeling in your stomach, you gave the others a forced smile.

There wasn't really any time for the others to question you about it because you were the next one up. Training your legs has always been one of your favorite things to do, so when you pushed off the ground with all your strength, you actually got a pretty acceptable result, nothing compared to Laser-Belly-Button or Bakugou who once more catapulted themselves to the other side with their quirks but still, you were pleased with your score.

You quickly got out of the way for the next person, it was a guy with red spikey hair. He was kinda cute so you figured you could stay to watch his jump along the sidelines. Up until now, you haven't really paid much attention to the red-haired boy but that was about to change.

His jump was great. 'He clearly trains a lot' you observed but you also noticed that he didn't use his quirk just like you. His score came pretty close to yours too and as his ass landed into the sand, you decided to start a conversation with him. After the robot announced his score and Aizawa made notes of it, you walked up to the boy in the sand and held out your hand.

"Not using your quirk either I see. By the way, I like your hair", you smiled at him. He looked a bit dumbfounded for a second staring up at your hand. He gathered himself quickly, giving you a big smile in return as he let you pull him up.

"Haha, thanks," he said attempting to hide his light blush by dusting off his pants. "Yeah my quirk doesn't really help me when it comes to most of the exercises," he explained while walking to the sidelines with you.

"Oh, by the way, I am Kirishima Eijiro." Today just wasn't your day, you were about to answer Kirishima, but someone just had to bump into you again, sending you tumbling forward and hitting a way too hard chest in front of you, before your ass hit the ground a second time today.

"Oopsie, that's on me I misjudged my speed a bit there." you could hear the familiar giggle from Ahido behind you. She was so excited to see you talk to one of her best friends Kirishima, that she just had to jump into the conversation. No way in hell was she gonna let this opportunity slip to lay the groundwork for a squad.

As you were laying on the ground a hand suddenly came into your vision. It was Kirishima who was holding his hand out towards you with a guilty smile plastered on his face.

"Sorry, I kinda used my quirk on accident. Hope I didn't hurt ya" you could feel the heat rising in your cheeks, taking Kirishima's rough hand for support, you hid your face behind some strands of hair.

"Well, I have to say your muscles are rock solid, it was like hitting a wall, that actually hurt a little." you laughed, trying to hide your embarrassment.

"So.." the pink girl interrupted the two of you throwing an arm over Kirishima's and your shoulder. "Y/N, this is Kirishima, Kirishima this is Y/N," Ashido said with a big stupid grin on her face, pushing herself off of your shoulders and jumping in front of you. She turned around to the two of you again, her eyes glowing with excitement, while she leaned forward and clapped in her hands. "Now that you have met, we can totally start hanging out together! I mean assuming that we all pass this test." she rambled on while jumping around like a hyperactive bouncy ball full of happiness.

"Ehmm sure?" you said but it sounded more like a question, scratching your head, you tried to understand what had just happened. Ashido's words and energy were a little bit overwhelming, so you didn't know how to react right away, but deep down you knew that this was the beginning of a great friendship.

"Looks like the two of you know each other pretty good already, huh?" you asked, looking between the two of them.

"Oh yeah, pinky and I are horn-buddies," Kirishima laughed taking Ashido's head underneath his arm in a headlock and ruffled her hair. She was squirming underneath Kirishima's grip trying to free herself but he wasn't even bothered by her attempts to escape, he just kept on messing up her hair. You couldn't hold back your laughter it was such an amusing scene to watch, Kirishima and Ashido soon after joined in with your contagious laugh.

"Damn right!" Ashido giggled "I know this one from middle school," she said while elbowing Kirishima into his side, making him lose his grip on her and giving her a chance to jump away to freedom.

"Anyways," Ashido smiled while fixing her hair "What were you two talking about?" she asked curiously.

"Oh yeah! I was about to explain my quirk to Y/N," Kirishima said facing you. "So.. my quirk is hardening, I can literally turn myself rock-solid" he grinned and stuck his tongue out teasingly, using your words to describe his quirk.

"Just show her already!" Ashido said with an overdramatic annoyed expression while making some big hand gestures. She got a bit carried away in the act and accidentally letting loose some of her acids. A sudden gasp from behind her, made her abruptly stop waving her arms around. The gasp came from a boy who just barely dodged her acid as he was walking over to your group. 

"Hey, watch the acid!" he laughed at the hyperactive alien girl. "Sorry about that," she said shyly, holding her hands behind her back as a precaution.

"What's going on over here?" the boy asked looking at you and Kirishima in confusion.

"Hey Kaminari, I was about to show Y/N here my quirk," Kirishima said with a proud grin flexing his biceps.

"You are such a show-off, Kirishima," the guy who apparently was called Kaminari said while playfully shoving his elbow into Spiky-hair’s side.

Kirishima just shrugged his shoulders in response and grinned. He looked back at you and took in his own special kiai stance, smashing his fists together in a satisfying thud. As his fists collided, his skin instantly changed, it looked like the surface and texture of actual rocks and it wasn't just his arms, the rock-like texture spread out over his whole body, even his hair turned solid and sharp.

"Damn Kirishima, your quirk is amazing! You will make such a good hero with that quirk.. Damn, I wish I had a quirk like that. No wonder it hurt when I hit your chest, you must be super strong! Do you train a lot? Pff obviously, look at those arms! Wait, can you like... cut through stuff with your hands like that? OHH.. can you smash a wall?? Oh my god, that would be so crazy! Can I touch it?"

You rambled in admiration and curiosity, gaining the weird and bewildered looks of the three in front of you. You didn't quite realize what you had just babbled but it made Ashido and Kaminari break into a fit of laughter, the confused look you gave them just made it worse. They were laughing even louder, tears in their eyes and faces bright red from the lack of oxygen. It was the moment your eyes meet Kirishima's and he rapidly looked away, that you realized what you had said. You covered your mouth in shock, feeling the heat rush into your face, even your ears were heating up from the embarrassment. Kirishima was looking away desperately trying to hide the rose color in his cheeks but you could still see it, which made the situation even more embarrassing.

"I-I didn't mean it like t-that!" you stammered out, wishing the ground would swallow you whole right then and there.

"Yeees Kirishima! Let her touch it!" Kaminari snorted, he and Ashido were now on the ground, rolling around in laughter. 

"Jeeez, I didn't know you were that bold" Ashido said. It was like pouring gasoline into the fire. You felt awkward hiding your face behind your fingers but the embarrassment was just too much. It felt like your face was on fire and an itchy feeling spread out through your legs, making you want to run away.

"What’s happening over here?" you heard an unknown voice from behind you. 'Oh god... noo! Please don't!' you thought suddenly wishing you had invisible girl's quirk, so you could disappear.

"Hahahaha, Sero you won't believe what Y/N just said!" Kaminari snorted facing the guy who was now standing next to you.

"She asked Kirishima if she could-" but he got interrupted by your panicked scream "AHH!" and before you even knew it, you were on the ground with Ashido and Kaminari, holding a hand in front of his mouth to shut him up.

"Lets just all.. forget about this okay?" you asked in a stressed-out voice, giving Ashido and Kaminari your most terrifying death glare ever. They both nodded their heads in agreement, making you sigh in relief.

"Great!" you said in a happy voice, trying to overplay the death of embarrassment you nearly had one minute ago.

"We should probably head to the next exercise. Don't you think? Yeah! I thought so. Kaminari, Ashido lets go!" Holding onto their arms, you started to speed-walk to the next test, where some of the others were already waiting, dragging the two with you so they couldn't embarrass you even further in front of Kirishima and that new guy.

Stifled laughter made your head snap back to the two figures you were dragging along, their faces weren't as red as before but you could still see their devious grins and watery eyes from laughing too hard. This made you even more irritated, you were gritting your teeth, forcing the blush, which was creeping up your face again, away. 

"I swear if you tell anyone about this, you won't live to see another day!" you growled at them, getting them to defensively raise their hands in return while yelling "Yes, ma'am!"

The next and fourth test was repeated side steps, which was the best exercise for the purple-ball-hair child. It was kinda impressive to watch him bounce against his hair? It was just your gut, but you had something against that child. You haven't even talked to him but your stomach was already telling you that you shouldn't even try to talk to him at all. Everybody was chatting and having fun using their quirks, you observed all but one person, no actually two people stood out. The green-haired guy who you had already exchanged a sentence or two with and Bakugou. Both of them were standing a little bit on the outside not engaging with the other classmates with the only difference between the two of them being, that Bakugou had a pissed facial expression and the green-haired boy looked like he just pissed himself. Seriously though, that kid looked like he was about to pass out, his face was all scrunched up and tense and he was trembling with a look of plain terror in his eyes.

'I really don't wanna know what that kid is thinking right now, his face is giving me nightmares already!' you thought shaking your head and walking over to Ashido, Kirishima, Kaminari and some other classmates you didn't know yet.

The softball throw was test number five and you were watching alongside all your classmates how everyone was doing. It wasn't really that interesting because most of the quirks weren't as explosive as Bakugou's, for example. It started to get interesting when the name "Uraraka" got called by Aizawa, making you elbow Ashido next to you. "Do you know her?" you asked mesmerized by the fearless, adorable girl from the beginning.

"Noo, not really," you heard Ashido next to you think out loud.

"Her name is Ochako Uraraka," the boy next to you said, it was the green-haired guy from before. "WOW, where did you come from?" you asked taken aback from his sudden appearance.

"S-Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you..uhh-" he began, noticing your flinch but you didn't give him the time to think your reaction over, you just smiled at him tilting your head a bit "My name is Y/N!"

The boy returned your smile shyly while scratching the back of his head "Oh, I knew that already but I thought it would be rude to call you by your name because we actually haven't introduced ourselves yet and-" but you cut him off, to stop him from starting an audible inner monologue, scared you would see his scared and terrified look from before again. 

You were waving your hands in front of you while shaking your head with a confused smile "Hey, it's fine just... tell me your name," you said snapping the boy back into your conversation.

"Oh right, sorry... my name is Midoriya Izuku," he answered shyly and you could see a very light shade of pink slowly covering his cheeks.

"So, do you know Uraraka? Or do you like... keep tabs on everybody in a notebook or something?" you joked, but your smile fell when you saw his face become bright red with an alarming look in his eyes.

"Oh god... you do?!" every part of you went on pause while your thoughts caught up to you, your mouth hung with lips slightly parted and your eyes were as wide as they could stretch. You slowly turned away from Midoriya, facing the exercise that was going on in front of you once more.

'Don't overthink this! Don't do it!' you scolded yourself but it didn't help.

'I have to stay away from that kid.. does he already know about my quirk? Did he like snoop through all of our U.A. files? He looks so innocent, there is no way in hell he could have gotten that information. I better keep my distance... I don't want him to catch up on my quirk and how I activate it.' an elbow to your ribs, snapped you out of your thoughts.

"Dude, what's with that look on your face?" Ashido asked, quirking an eyebrow and gaining your full attention at once.

"Uhhhh... I was just lost in thought..." you said, that answer didn't really satisfy Ashido. She shrugged and pointed forward "Your girl-crush is about to throw, better snap out of it," she chuckled, getting the exact reaction she wanted from you.

"W-What?!? Hold your fucking horses, I never said she was my girl-crush!" you said defensively, trying to stay calm but you could already feel your ears starting to heat up again.

"Calm down!" Ashido laughed, "I was just teasing." and without another word, you looked back towards Uraraka.

Pink-cheeks threw the ball and it rose up to the sky with a constant speed, there wasn't even a waver in the motion of the ball, it rose higher and higher without any signs of stopping soon. Your gaze fell towards Aizawa, who was staring down at the device, he turned towards the group of you and you could see the infinity symbol on the screen.

"Infinity?" everybody asked in unison, some in shock, others in admiration and the green-haired boy again totally terrified.

You heard Kaminari mutter a "That's insane! How is that possible?" Your classmates mumbling quieted down when Aizawa called Midoriya's name.

"Dude, he looks like he's about to shit his pants" the pink girl chuckled next to you, making you feel kinda bad for the boy but he really did look like he had a bad stomach ache.

"That kid has had this look on his face since Aizawa told us about the test. I’m guessing he thinks he is gonna get cut," you said, crossing your arms in front of you. "Why the hell is he so damn terrified? I mean he got past the entrance exam. Unless his quirk is useless for all of those exercises..." you thought out loud, getting the attention of Engine-calves who was standing in hearing distance from you.

"If Midoriya doesn't shape up soon, he will be the one going home," the boy with glasses said with a serious expression.

"HUUH? Of course, he is, he’s a quirkless loser!" Bakugou interrupted the guy in annoyance, but glasses-guy wasn't having his bullshit.

"He has a quirk! Did you not hear about what he did in the entrance exam?" Engine-calves asked confused, giving Bakugou a judging look like a nerd looking at someone who didn't do their homework.

You were all staring at Midoriya as he was about to throw when you suddenly noticed Aizawa's scarf and hair going all crazy. "What the fuck..." you mumbled as the ball from Midoriya's hand landed 46 meters in front of him.

"I erased your quirk" Aizawa spoke in a dangerous and dark tone and when you got a glimpse of his profile, glowing red eyes were replacing his tired black ones. "The judges for the entrance exam were not rational enough. Someone like you should’ve never been allowed to enroll at this school." he continued while staring down at the boy. 'Ouch,' you thought to yourself 'poor kid'.

"Wait you did what to my..." Midoriya started but he cut himself off with an unmanly gasp "Those goggles! I know you! You can look at someone and cancel out their powers... the eraser hero 'Eraserhead'!" the green-haired boy yelled out of surprise.

'Damn, that kid really keeps tabs on all of us... what a stalker!'

Everybody around you started to discuss this newfound information. 

"Eraserhead? Who is that?" you heard most of them ask, some of them even said they had heard of him before but that wasn't really the thing on your mind right now. As much as it scared and pained you, you turned towards Bakugou.

"Ey Bakug-" you tried to get his attention, which worked pretty well because he fired an insult right back at you before you could even finish saying his name.

"Who the fuck told you that you could just talk to me, shitface?" he growled at you, crimson eyes glaring into your soul but you weren't having his bullshit either. You had a question and you needed an answer for the sake of your mind's peace. But first, you had to bite down on your lip to force down the anger that was boiling up inside you.

"You said Midoriya is quirkless? How come Eraserhead is canceling out his quirk then?" you asked curiously because you knew for a fact that Bakugou was everything but a liar. He also wasn't stupid enough to throw accusations around without reason, ignoring the fact that he throws out insulting nicknames.

"We went to the same fucking middle school and he didn't have a quirk back then!" he hissed looking back at the green-haired boy who was wrapped in Aizawa's scarf. 

‘Probably getting probably a scary pep talk’ you figured, remembering the speeches the teacher gave you guys at the beginning of testing. You watched how he let go of the boy and the crazy hair and scarf of your teacher returned to normal, eyes going back to black. He was walking away from Midoriya and you could hear Engine-calves speak up again. 

"I wonder if our teacher gave him some advice..." he mumbled while rubbing his chin, he sounded a bit worried although you didn't know if it was on behalf of Midoriya or out of selfish reasons.

"Probably told him to start packing!" Bakugou interrupted the boy clearly pissed at this whole situation or maybe because you had talked to him minutes ago.

With a sudden newfound determination, you watched how Midoriya threw, more like catapulted the ball straight into the sky with such power it reminded you of Bakugou's explosive throw. Everybody gasped in shock, not expecting this at all. While everyone was looking at Midoriya, your eyes automatically fell upon Bakugou, you couldn't help it. 

He was frozen into place, crimson eyes wide open with his jaw on the ground, you could even see a vein popping in his temple. You could feel the air around you getting slightly hotter and a whiff of caramel reached your nose. "Oh no..." you mumbled, knowing exactly what was about to happen. The ash-blond boy set off into a mad dash, screaming in rage: "HEY DEKU, YOU BASTARD, TELL ME HOW YOU DID THAT OR YOU’RE DEAD!" You were sure that if Midoriya hadn't shit his pants before this point, he definitely had now. Everything happened pretty fast which was kinda refreshing, Aizawa had Bakugou pinned into place by his scarf, meters away from a trembling Midoriya.

"What? Why the hell is your damn scarf so strong?" Bakugou struggled, turning his head slightly to give Aizawa his signature death glare.

"Because it's a capture-weapon made out of carbon fiber and a special metal alloy. Stand down. It would be wise to avoid making me use my quirk so much. It gives me serious dry eye." your teacher said in an annoyed tone, making your class yell in sync: "Too bad... that power is amazing!"

'Like seriously? Is this some sort of choir or does everybody happen to know how to use telekinesis?' you rolled your eyes at the comment from your classmates.

"You’re wasting my time now. Whoever is next can step up." your homeroom teacher scoffed while retreating his scarf and walking off.

"Is your finger okay?" the adorable Pink-cheeks girl asked Midoriya worried, which made your eyes shift to his hand. His finger was purple, bruised and totally crooked, you could even see the misplacement of the bones although it wasn't even an open fracture. 

"Sure, I’m fine!" the boy said giving Uraraka a forced smile but you could clearly see him wince in pain when he moved his hand. Your brain was going into overdrive again, not able to comprehend what was happening. How can this 'quirkless boy' out of nowhere have a quirk which apparently isn't even accustomed to his body?

Bakugou, who was still standing in the same spot was trembling in anger, his thoughts were colored in red, the fury inside of him was making him numb to the pain he was conflicting to himself by clenching his fists so tightly that his knuckles were white and his nails dug into his skin.

A frown was plastered on your face as you watched the ash-blond boy intensely. He was like a fixed point in your brain because your eyes were constantly drawn to him and you couldn't do anything about it. You should’ve been glad that he had Midoriya to hate, bully and harass now but seeing Bakugou in that state made you kinda sad.

'Get it together!' you thought to yourself, shaking your head aggressively to force those thoughts out of your head. Why do you even care about how Bakugou might be feeling right now? Why did you want to know the reason for his never stopping anger so badly?

You had to clear your head and what could be a better way to do that than doing some sit-ups? Without hesitation, you pulled Mina and the rest with you to the sixth exercise, where you had to do sit-ups in pairs.

"Hey Kirishima, you wanna pair up with me for this exercise?" you asked the red-haired boy after Mina had already paired up with Kaminari, giving you a devilish wink while suggesting you should ask Kirishima.

"Yeah! Let's do this!" Kirishima cheered, pumping one of his fists into the air. 'That boy really loves his workouts' you chuckled to yourself.

You were able to do quite a lot of sit-ups, which was part of your daily training from a young age on after your mom decided to put good use to your enhanced abilities and making you learn mixed martial arts. Kirishima was also smashing it, he didn't even break a sweat when most of the people were already giving up. It was a really amusing workout for you, having Kirishima hype you up and cheer you on, providing you with a mental boost, making you obviously return the favor, which turned into you yelling at him to "Man up!" and "Keep going if you want to be a hero!".

The seated toe-touch was the seventh and easiest exercise. You could easily put your head onto your knees and reach for your toes, which gained curious glances from some of the boys. You thought you even heard the weird purple child say something along the lines of "flexible chicks are the best!" but you decided that your subconscious made you imagine that thirsty comment just so you wouldn't have to deal with the pervert.

The last exercise of the day was the long-distance run, which you absolutely hated. Cardio is fine but you had more fun training with weights. You are a good runner but the fact that you weren’t allowed to listen to any music was straight-up torture, so you decided to just get this over with as fast as possible. After crossing the finish line you didn't fall to the ground as most of the others did. Your blood was pumping rapidly through your veins and laying down sure sounded heavenly but you had to stretch your muscles and calm them down slowly to avoid injuring them, so you just started to walk around to cool down. You could feel your body dripping in sweat. "Ugh, disgusting" you mumbled pulling on your training uniform, which was sticking to you like a second skin.

After everybody had finished their run, you all gathered around your teacher. You could see the exhaustion in some of your classmate's faces, some of them looked really tense and scared and some of the others were smiling proudly, a few people had an unreadable expression plastered over their faces, which you just wrote off as an unimpressed look.

"Alright, time to give you your results. I have ranked you from best to worst. You should probably have a good idea of your standing already. I will just pull up the whole list, it’s not worth it going over each individual score." and with the press of a button, a ranking list appeared out of thin air. 

You noticed that Bakugou wasn't first place like he was in the entrance exam but you also didn’t hold up to your title. Still, you were pretty proud of ranking on place number 11, right after Pink-cheeks. You immediately looked for the name at the bottom of the score, for the one who had to go home and it hurt you to see that it was indeed Midoriya, one of the people you actually got to know a little.

"And I was lying. No one is going home." Aizawa offhandedly commented, making nearly everyone's eyes pop out of their sockets.

"That was just a rational deception to make sure you give your all during the tests," he added with a mischievous smile, gaining screams from the people he had fooled.

"I am surprised the rest of you didn't figure that out. I guess I probably should have said something" a girl mumbled thoughtfully, gaining the annoyed and pissed off stares of all the people who feared get cut today.

"That was pretty nerve-wracking huh?" the boy from before, Sero; you thought was his name, said to Kirishima.

"Naah, I am always down for a challenge!" Kirishima said confidently clenching his fist, he actually made it pretty high on the ranking, he was placed 8th on the list right before your friend Ashido who ranked 9th.

"That's it, we’re done for today. Pick up a syllabus in the classroom, read it over before tomorrow morning." Aizawa said, waving you off and ending your very first day at U.A.

<-- previous Chapter | next Chapter -->

[zhydoesart]

Unconditional Love

I’ve never posted a fic on Tumblr before, so if the formatting’s terrible, I’m sorry.

Ship(s): DLAMP

Warnings:  gender dysphoria, sympathetic Deceit

AO3

Patton paced his room as he thought. …”he”? It just didn’t sound right. Why would he (ugh) have a problem with his pronouns all of a sudden? On Thursday, Patton had cringed when Virgil had referred to… them?… as “him,” but Monday Patton had been fine with Roman saying “he.”

Patton had about a dozen examples of times where it’d been fine to be called “he” and a dozen more times where it had felt wrong.

Nothing sounded quite right to Patton’s ears. Patton supposed that “they” might work for now, but they still weren’t… certain. They had done their best to ignore the tightness that felt as though a rope were wrapped tightly around their upper torso, or a snake slithering across their chest, squeezing them so hard they could barely breathe, but there had also been the accompanying twinge in their temple that usually caused them to flinch. So far, any discomfort they’d shown due to their pronouns had gone unnoticed by their boyfriends, and Patton wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not.

Patton halted their current stride in front of the mirror. Their reflection stared back at them, blinking as Patton did; brown hair as curly as always, ocean eyes wide and somewhat concerned. They took in their disheveled demeanor, cat-eared sweatshirt more loosely tied around their shoulders than it would be on a typical day.

It was Patton, they knew that much, but… something felt wrong, something was off. They didn’t look any different from usual, but for some reason Patton felt different—it was their semi-masculine form, wasn’t it?

A sort of whine started in their head, growing in pitch and volume, and their body began to heat up, a prickling feeling in the corner of their eyes.

Unwittingly, Patton felt around for the nearest unbreakable object, and they hadn’t even realized they’d thrown a paperweight until it left their hand, crashing into the mirror with a loud, sharp sound.

Patton watched as the cracks spiderwebbed out from the point of contact, the shards of their reflection splintering and falling to the floor. Almost surreally, they thought that now their reflection matched how they felt inside: broken and uncertain. Patton fell to their knees as the last of their strength gave way.

Footsteps coming down the hall went unnoticed; someone fumbled with the doorknob, and it swung open to reveal Logan. His face was as blank as always, but Patton could tell from the way his shoulders hunched slightly that he was concerned. Roman, Virgil, and Damien stood behind Logan, all with varying expressions of worry.

Logan blinked when he saw Patton on the floor—their tears dripping to the ground—noticing the broken pieces of mirror and absorbing any and all clues to the situation at hand. He then walked over to Patton, lowering himself to their level to tentatively place a hand on their shoulder. Patton sniffed, trying to pretend like nothing was wrong, and quite likely failing miserably.

“Patton.” Logan’s voice was uncharacteristically soft as he rubbed their back. “What happened? I assume the cacophonous noise we heard was the mirror breaking, but why did you break it?”

Patton took a deep breath, hoping to be able to compose themself. “I-I didn’t mean to. I guess I just didn’t like what I saw.” They wished they hadn’t gotten their boyfriends involved; they’d rather just be the happy one, they didn’t want to be seen in such a state of disarray.

“Why not?” Confused, Virgil cocked his head.

Patton searched for the words to explain. “I, uh… think I might be genderfluid,” they admitted, biting their lip. “I guess I overreacted and assumed that you guys wouldn’t love me anymore.”

Roman’s eyebrows rose. “And what, pray tell, is that?”

“It means sometimes you feel like a girl, sometimes you feel like a guy, and sometimes you’re neither, or both,” Virgil was quick to jump in.

“That’s right,” Patton said, eyebrows furrowing. “How do you know that?”

Virgil sighed. “I’m actually trans, heh. And I experimented for a while with my identity before figuring it out.” That was news to Patton, and they were sure it was new information to the others as well, judging by their expressions.

“You are?” they managed, making eye contact with Virgil, who’d moved further into the room and was now standing in front and slightly to the right of Patton.

He nodded. “I’d spent so long trying out different nonbinary identities that when I figured it out, it sort of hit me out of the blue: that I was a guy. I’ve been Virgil since I was seventeen.” He rubbed the back of his neck in a mixture of what seemed like embarrassment from having spilled such a secret and relief from not having to hide it anymore. “So don’t think that we won’t still love you, popstar. That’s absurd.” He froze. “Uh, sorry, can I still call you popstar, or is that too…?”

Patton considered. “Nah, keep the dad-themed nicknames. My dad powers transcend gender.” He felt a small smile flicker across his face, leaving as soon as it appeared.

Damien spoke up from where he was leaning against the doorway. “I haven’t told anyone this, but I don’t give myself labels. I only use ‘he’ because it’s easiest.” His face formed a familiar sly grin. “So you’re not alone in this, sugar.”

“Do you really think we’re so shallow, Padre?” interjected Roman next. “We’ve known each other since high school—Damien too, technically; even though we didn’t talk much back then, we were still classmates and worked on a few projects together. So what if you go through a few pronoun changes? You’re still Patton Hart, our boyfriend, and we still love you.” His eyes glazed over as he realized something. “Ooh, you know what? Maybe when you’re in a feminine mood, I’ll take you shopping. It’ll be fun! And who knows, maybe I’ll buy something from the ‘female’ section for myself.” He winked.

“We’re a very accepting bunch,” Virgil added, slipping his hand into Roman’s. “We were all 'weird’ for some thing in high school, so we came together in our differentness.” He muttered something that sounded suspiciously like “I don’t think that’s a word” before continuing. “So what if you’re not always a he anymore? Gender binary, hell, being normal, is overrated. It’s better to just be you, Patton.”

Patton looked to Logan now, who was the only one who hadn’t spoken on the matter.

Logan caressed their cheek, grayish eyes gazing into blue ones as he pulled Patton into his arms. “Patton, we love you, and we won’t stop loving you for something like that.” Awkwardly, he paused. “I feel as though everyone else has already said everything there was to say.”

Patton smiled, bumping Logan’s nose with their own. “Then kiss me already.”

“Gladly,” obliged Logan. Virgil squeezed Roman’s hand gently as he, Roman, and Damien watched their boyfriends fondly.

Logan and Patton broke apart, and Patton discovered they’d found out what they felt like today. “Uh, okay, so then, today I feel like a ‘she.’”

“Alright.” Logan took it in stride, a quiet smile on his lips.

Patton knew she was truly lucky to have people who cared so unconditionally for her; she knew that, no matter what, her four boyfriends would always be there for her, and she hoped that would never change.