#u go bby
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Anyone else leveling Astarion into Necromancer? As a treat?
No? Just me?
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Prompt 227
There's not much known about Realms beings.
Which is understandable, seeing as it's called infinite for a reason. But it still causes a problem when people are trying to properly learn about something. Maybe try not to cause an interdimensional accident or war.
Something no one wishes for.
So Constantine is THIS close to laughing and screaming hysterically when a cult's summoning goes wrong and summons what he's pretty sure is a Baby Realms Being.
Which probably means Mama is on the way.
#Dcxdp#Dpxdc#Prompts#mom danny#Why yes it's gremlin Dani who got summoned#Danny is not Ghost King#However he is technically ghost prince via Clockwork's adoption#CW never finished the divorce with Pariah lol#Space Core Danny#Moon core Ellie#Constanine is going to have EVERYONE going through the small bit of info out there about Realms beings#I need u to know that if the parent ghost is not big enoigh to pull a crocodile they'll hold bby like an otter
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#i know dean isnt that tall but like#idk.#its too late now.#u ever think about dean and that 1 coat he had#that was like...a little frayed from wearing it?#yeah me too.#i fucking loved that#also the amulet...dean.....bby pls#why did u throw it away#also idk whats going on w cas' coat#my art#destiel#dean winchester#supernatural#castiel
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i was bored
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also a ver w nicky bcs i forgot abt him lol
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[jazz hands] i present to u: the monsters !! [crowd booes]
#ummm i do think aaron is bigger than andrew js bcs he is a backliner but idkk i wish there was an avatar w my ideal big andrew body 🤒#also cowering at andrew’s feet i’m so sorry bby i didn’t mean to put u in that frat boy fit 💔#looking at this rlly makes u go wow kevin is a giant standing nest to these guys 😭#this was a bit fun i admit#they must have looked a bit silly like ur ringleader is a 5ft nothing emo ?? sorry for laughing#neil being stuffed in the backseat w the twinyard beefies sign me up as well 🙌#aftg#kevin day#neil josten#andrew minyard#aaron minyard#nicky hemmick#the monsters
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🥺🥺🥺
#obey me#obey me nightbringer#obey me simeon#when estas comiendo y recuerdas lo bueno que Simeon a sido contigo:#you're the reason I keep going. love u bby#liked the lesson for the Simeon bits#also Raphael breakdown (and Mephisto lol)
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fly high creloise 2024-2024 🕊
#eloise bridgerton#cressida cowper#eloise x cressida#creloise#bridgerton#spoilers#bridgerton spoilers#SPOILER ALERT#streets are saying creloise will be falling apart#and cress will blackmail pen in the end so all of her character devt attempts were for nothing apparently#anyway cressida cowper ur problematic ass will always be loved by me#i will never not understand what you're going through that u do the things u do bby#you will always be a (repressed) lesbian to me
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tattooist choso my beloved mwahh
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#choso#choso kamo#i can cook clean bark whatever u want bby#tattooist choso….please kiss me mwah#im going to kms#im going insane#HIMMMMM#CHOSAUUUURRR#digital art#fanart#jjk fanart
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Oscar heaved a sigh of defeat, plonking himself at the edge of the bed. “Well, he locked his door again-.. and he’s either ignoring me, or he’s got his headphones in, or both.”
“What the hell happened yesterday?” Courtney asked, rolling toward Oscar sleepily.
Oscar shrugged; he wasn’t entirely sure. The whole evening had been a disaster from start to finish. “I don’t know, he got in a fight with that kid, didn’t he-.. and my old neighbour saw us n’ decided to reminisce about me fucking OD’ing.”
“He didn’t actually say that, did he?” Courtney’s brows knitted together in shock.
Oscar shook his head, “No, he just said some shit about how he thought I was dead in that grotty bathroom at the Mill-.. I thought Ivan n’ Rhys found me but I guess he must’ve been there too, who knows.”
“What an idiot, bringing that up at the school gates.” Courtney tutted. Oscar nodded in agreement, pausing for a moment before suggesting, “Maybe I should explain what actually happened? He knew I was lying.” Courtney stiffened, “No, he’s too young!” “I hated it when my parents blatantly lied to me though, I’m telling you; he fucking knows.”
Courtney hummed, scratching Oscar’s back thoughtfully. “I’m more worried about him fighting.” Oscar pondered for a moment before replying, “It sounds like he was just standing up for himself. If he makes a habit of it, then we’ll worry.” “Yeah, okay…”
Oscar and Courtney glanced at one another as Robin unlocked his door and bolted to the bathroom, hastily locking that door behind him too. With a quick shove, Courtney hissed, “Go, go!”
Robin leapt across the landing and threw himself into his room, his sigh of relief swiftly retreated in on itself as he swung his door shut, however; Oscar had outsmarted him, waiting behind the door.
“I’m not going!” Robin yelled, “I’m sick…” Oscar calmly shook his head from side to side, “That’s not gonna fly, is it? We both know you’re not sick…”
Robin clenched his fists tight enough for his knuckles to turn white, desperately willing himself to vomit on command, faint, have some kind of fit-.. anything would do.
“If you’re worried about-…” “I don’t give a shit about Levi.” Robin spat.
Oscar frowned worriedly; he knew Robin hadn’t wanted their holiday to end, or to go back to school, but this abrupt fit of anger was highly uncharacteristic. Surely it was still too early to be worried about the dreaded P word? He had the faint beginnings of bags under his little eyes too-.. which were red raw and puffy, as though he’d spent more time crying last night than he had sleeping.
“What’s the matter, buddy?” Oscar asked gently, gesturing toward Robin with an outstretched hand. Robin shrugged a shoulder as he crawled beside Oscar, suddenly feeling guilty for yelling. What if his father died right after he’d said something awful and mean? He’d never forgive himself.
“Is it something in particular? A bit of everything?” Robin remained silent, anxiously nibbling at a stray strip of skin on his bottom lip. “Talk to me…” Oscar pleaded.
Robin wriggled away from the comfort of his father’s arms and curled into a ball. What the hell was he supposed to say? That he couldn’t sleep all night because he kept seeing Oscar’s lifeless body on a bathroom floor, on a stretcher, in a hospital-.. dying in various awful ways again and again until he wasn’t sure what the difference was between someone else’s memories and his own imagination. That he just wanted his brain to stop and for everyone to just shut up-.. just for once, please.
Oscar didn’t know what to do with Robin’s prolonged silence. He desperately wanted to explain what Larry had been talking about, but Courtney was probably right about him being too young. Besides, he didn’t even know if that was the issue. It could’ve been Larry, or the fight with Levi, or the fact that he missed Alex-.. all of the above, something else entirely?
“I know this Levi kid is probably doing your head in, but you can’t just go around hitting people-.. it’s not okay.”
Robin knew full well that violence wasn’t the answer, but he couldn’t deny that it’d felt a little satisfying to take his frustrations out on Levi. Any normal child might’ve asked if their parents were angry with them-.. except Robin wasn’t normal, and he already knew that Oscar wasn’t mad, nor his mother, so he kept his mouth shut.
Grasping at straws, Oscar cast his mind back to when he was a child. Whenever he was in one of his moods, as his mother always put it, he just needed to know that someone would listen, and he certainly didn’t want to be yelled at or mithered-.. but most of all, he just wanted to be left alone, at least for a little while…
“You can have one day, okay? Just one.” Oscar acquiesced. Robin barely moved, giving the tiniest of nods in response.
“Alright.” Oscar sighed inwardly, tussling Robin’s ginger curls with affection before reluctantly leaving him be.
Previous // Next
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#ts4#sims 4#simblr#ts4 story#sims story#forever in between#fib#oscar finch#courtney finch#robin finch#woooo prose 🤸♀️#not so woo.. sad robin#MY BOY!#😭#he's so upset abt the whole larry thing but he can't say anything about it ahhhhhhhhdkjkdjskj#did anyone else go thru a phase where u were convinced ur parents were gonna die when they were a kid?#or was it just my tiny ocd brain that was broken???#man i hated that phase#i feel u bby bird boy 😩🤧#twoverdose
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Ok. I work on a floor with 2 bunsen burners and a flamible/combustible liquids cabnet. Last week, I realized I didn't know where the fire extinguisher was (despite frequently using an open flame). Turns out it is out the door and down the hall. About as far from the fire hazards as possible. And I can't stop thinking abt it. Like. That feels fucking crazy right? I ask bc I seem to be the only person who cares. I told my advisor that I think we should have more fire extinguishers and he looked at me blank faced (despite the fact that he had to actively wander around the whole floor bc he also didn't kno where it was). And like yeah, in 20 years they haven't had a fire and maybe they never will but this feels like a fucking common sense preventative measure? It's just tempting fate. The hubris of not putting a fire extinguisher next to a bunsen burner is driving me crazy?? It's not even in the same god damn room! You would have to run out the room, sprint down the hall, open the case, and sprint back to use it! Why am I the only one who cares???
#am i just a fucking rule following loser??? maybe. but like. it seems like not a single person gives a fuck abt safety in the god damn state#im in the fucking land of liberatarians and everyone just seems fine to pour live cultures down the sink and let ppl walk thru the outskirts#of a superfund site without protective equipment. fucking. god dammit. they dont even make u do lab safety training!!!!#at my last school i had to do online trianing. take a test and get it renewed every year. then get special training for hazardous waste#disposal bc we autoclaved our biological waste. which we dont fucking do here. here u take a common sense test that one of ur peers#basically assumes u passed and there u go. ur trained to work in the lab. and my last fucking school was not in some progressive utopia#i was in the southwest. i didn't kno we could get more yeehaw hands off than that. i just. its crazy#and i feel like im the only one who cares. and i feel like im being a cry bby for saying something but im not gonna fucking let it go#bc it is one of my greatest god damn fears to make a stupid fucking mistake and not be able to fix it in a way that was clearly fucking#preventable. so like fuck u. accidents fucking happen. my friend had to use a fire extinguisher last semester bc she started an ethanol fire#ugh. my advisor said he would talk to someone higher up at the University bc it feels like this should b their problem. Anyway. i told my#dad abt this and he was absolutely astounded bc he works for the government and they have a million safetly standards#ugh. i hate this. this is why ppl dont fucking speak up when they see something weird. now i gotta b a neurotic lil safety bitch#unrelated
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being unable to stand each other when you’re sober but fucking like rabbits when you’re drunk, so he goes out a little more than he did before, alcohol almost coming to taste sweet to him 'cause his psyche knows the taste of you will come after it.
and you'll make excuses next time you see him. it was the herradura, don't let it get to your head; it's not something you would do if you were in your right mind, you tell yourself.
he'll roll his eyes, call you arrogant and nowhere near pretty enough to be acting so conceited; it's no wonder i need a few rounds in my system to be delusional enough to fuck you.
but he'll ask you if you're going out again tonight. and he'll wear that cologne that gets you to bury your face in the crook of his neck, biting, sucking, licking until he grips your face and kisses you, all tongue and teeth.
and you'll whisper i love you's, forgotten once you leave in the morning. except he doesn't forget them.
he doesn't know how long he can take this cycle, but he's willing to bear it, holding onto the hope that one day he'll wake up and you'll still be there.
#for my bbys gojo and zoro <3#gojo hates drinking until the first time he wakes up hungover with your scent still in his sheets and then he hates it a little less#and zoro was never the type to go out drinking but he put up with the loud music for a repeat of you#another drabble that might become something longer someday#thank u modo melancolico#gojo x reader#zoro x reader#one piece x reader#jjk x reader#୨⎯ pedacito de sol ☼
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Last night I dreamed about having a boyfriend and that’s like okay whatever but guys just listen to the dream okay
We were out walking in the woods and one of the balls fell off my septum ring and I was so sad bc I was worried I was gonna lose my septum (which has happened before irl and I had to get repierced bc it closed) and dream bf took the ball off his piercing and gave it to me :(((
He was so sweet and kind and would rather lose his piercing than let me lose mine and he’s noT REAL AND IM AWAKE AND I MISS HIM AND I DONT KNOW WHY THIS IS WHAT MY SUBCONCIOUS SEES AS ROMANCE??? But now I’m sad bc nobody will ever love me like this fictional man my brain conjured up >:ccc I will never know that type of love AND FHATS NOT FAIR
#I think it’s my 🩸 making me emotional#I’m going back to sleep ughhh#dream boyfriend come back I miss u bby#I think he was also trans#t4t dream pls let me back in
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sorry but the speed at which thistle goes from wanting to blast laios to hell dragon-style to granting him the "honor" of joining his perfect fairytale within the span of, what, an hour tops? is convincing me that he absolutely split on this guy sunshine-ways after realizing he was trying to help
don't try to tell me this was a backstabber move because this irradiated piece of clown kibble was being 100% sincere. he was planning to do the same to delgal! also is this the face of a two-timer to you?
look at him. he made a helpful new friend :) he's feeding a stray
#he's so so so funny but i get him i really do#if i had his mental illness and whos to say i don't well i'll tell you#i'm trying to protect my loved ones? dummy comes in and outsmarts me and heals my shoulder and feeds me so-so home cooking and#gives me premium advice on buffing up my high security prison?#i'd go from KILL THIS MOTHERFUCKER to OMG BESTIE so fast you wouldn't believe#and i have. several times. minus the forcefeeding#in thistle's pov he isn't shoving a thing of goop down laios' throat he's holding a bottle of milk to a wee little kitten's mouth#who's a good smart boy huh. you are yes you are!!! delgal look at my new puppy!!!#anyway love u thistle stay real bby <3#thistle#thistle dungeon meshi#laios#laios & thistle#dunmeshi#dmposting#dm spoilers#bebisel#roomba media#fn#txt#sc
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sukuna and gojo use binding vows for sex, taking things like orgasm denials or touch deprivation steps further, where the other is contractually bound to not be able to do certain things, like touch themselves or touch the other etc etc
one such instance being a vow where gojo has a vibrator up his ass, but he can't touch himself or remove it, until sukuna specifically, pulls it out.
he keeps the vibe in throughout the day, with sukuna controlling it remotely, even as they both go throughout their separate days.
gojo goes to have his usual breakfast, and meets yuuji at the dining room, they greet and sit next to each other. yuuji is, as always, energetic and excited to see him
they make conversation, until gojo gives a jolt and starts twitching and huffing. sukuna has turned the vibrator up all the way. yuuji worries and panics and asks him what's wrong. gojo gives a breathy laugh and reassures him. he motions low and tells yuuji about the vibrator inside him, through sudden jolts and soft whimpers.
satoru complains about it, and yuuji advices to remove it or go and take care of himself.
except gojo states that he can’t and yuuji puzzles.
"it's... a pact—mmh!"
"a pact???" yuuji's voice rises in volume, but he visibly calms, shoulders dropping into a fond sigh. "sensei, you really are..." that's all he can manage to say. reprimand is useless. gojo likes it, yuuji is well aware, he is enjoying every second of this, even as he complains.
gojo gives a few odd jolts, undoubtedly an odd pattern of intensity from the vibe, yuuji can guess. sudden irregular ups and downs that are not taken well by the man.
satoru clicks his tongue. "what is that guy doing?" he actually looks irritated for a moment—a look yuuji doesn’t get to see often—until it’s broken with a sigh and his pleased, calm demeanor returns, mimicking the soft waves of pleasure across his thighs.
still, yuuji can see his hands crumpled at his sides, undoubtedly wishing to use them.
that's when satoru perks flares up all of a sudden.
"actually, yuuji,” he turns to look at him, grinning. “you can help me" he opens his legs and lifts the edges of his kimono, his dick peeking out the fabric. yuuji gulps at the sight. satoru motions to it, giving yuuji a wordless look. yuuji hesitates for a moment, but complies, taking his hand to the cock, and starts stroking.
satoru crumbles under the touch, immediately breathing out his nose and muffling moans. he leans into yuuji, wrapping an arm around his shoulders, fingers clasped in yuuji's kimono, nuzzling into his hair and whining in his ear.
satoru's sounds fluctuate in pitch and volume, making it known when his vibe's gotten stronger. yuuji keeps his pace and satoru spills in his hand. he twitches and sighs, soft breaths against yuuji's flushed ear.
yuuji stares at the cum in his hand.
"you can wipe it on me,” satoru tells him with a breath that's calmed much too fast. “my clothes are already soiled anyways". and yuuji feels bad for it, but he obeys nonetheless.
satoru takes a hand to yuuji's chin and turns his face to him and gives him a kiss. short and sweet.
"as a reward." he smiles at yuuji. the boy surprises but takes it happily, cheeks warm and eyes softened, albeit a bit timidly. a tinge of disappointment colors the edges of his face.
"you want more?" satoru brings his face to yuuji's again. the vibrations have reached a slight plateau, so his voice is steadier.
yuuji’s face widens a bit, but he nervously chuckles, pulling back from gojo's face. "no, it's alright," he lies. "i don't want sukuna to kill me"
but satoru’s already pulling into him, breathing into his lips. "i won't let him <3"
"that's...actually reassuring......" yuuji’s eyes flutter shut as satoru's lips meet his again.
and with that, they're kissing and slowly the vibrations and gojo’s twitching start again. satoru moves atop yuuji's lap to straddle him, and while they kiss, yuuji takes his hand between them and jerks him off again. satoru moans and gasps into his mouth, each jolt mirroring the pulses against his prostate.
they separate for gojo to bury his face in yuuji's shoulders, arms hugging his neck. he humps into yuuji's hand until he comes against him again.
he pants and huffs atop the boy, catching his breath. yuuji's gentle arms hold him, fingers rubbing slow circles at his back.
satoru's breathing calms against yuuji’s neck.
"yuuji, u're such a good boy."
yuuji's heart and dick swell.
#f.txt#scenario that has been plaguing my brain and i needed to share#just when they're done nobara and megumi come into the dining room#nobara twists her face. 'geh. itadori. taking advantage of a married man'#yuuji squints his eyes at her 'like u're one to talk'#nobara: still. at the breakfast table. could u be any more shameless#she says that but still makes her away to sit across them megumi following suit#megumi: go easy on him. it’s probably gojo-sensei’s doing anyways#gojo: oh megumi~ u know me so well#jjk#sukugo#yuugo#悠五#sukugoyuu#ns4w#the moment of random ups and downs is sukuna drawing out “satoru” in the vibrrator app bc he wants his gojo :c#meanwhile gojo's all irritated like 'what is wrong with him 😑' bby boy ur husband MISSES U#for context this is in my post-canon everyone lives au (well. one of them) where everything is good and happy and sukugo get married and#sukuna gets domesticated (?)#well more like. he's still bad and evil. but he's tamed i guess#he (begrudgingly) coexists with everyone else and behaves lmao#also everyone kinda lives together? it's a bit of a weird situation idk#anyways#this kinda made me want to write again. i havent written in so long#tho i suppose this does count as writing#i also have more stuff to add to this ill do some rbs !!
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happy belated valentines day quodo upon thee! originally posted on ao3 for the quodo minifest, this was my valentines for @chacusha, who organized the event! i had a ton of fun drawing them and im definitely looking forward to next year <333
+ bonus art based on the comic by Kate Beaton, Javert is in Slash Fiction:
#quodo#quodo minifest#star trek#star trek ds9#Quark/Odo Kiss ///REAL NOT FAKE/// CLICK HERE>>>>>#did someone say quodo rights night??? either way Here it IS <3#i added image descriptions to the alt text but let me know if you need them visible under the post as well!#initially i was going to post this to twitter months ago but alas. re: the state of things and life in general#anyway this was so much fun !! it literally got me motivated to draw...i couldn't stop i had to keep going and did another...then another..#i should compile all the other drawing i did of them bc oh Boy there were a Few#also getting odo's features just right was harder than i thought. meanwhile quark was like BOOM! there he is :)#also did u see the shoe. did u see the shine did u see it. bc i swear im never coloring shoes again#all the refs i had to use.....and if you think i exaggerated quark's fat ass well Think Again i only took from Reality! it's all there bby#my obligatory one art post a year....what was my art tag again.......oh well time to revamp it#myart#also pls go read the other fics!! i know i made a post of this before but i cant believe the one i received back...kisses them.#it was perfect! literally made for me! in fact im reading it right now! wedding of the century by sirenoftitan and Boy was it ever!!!
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The Mess of Us
A/N: i have no excuse honestly. I've imprinted on David York for reasons unfathomable to my own brain. This is my attempt at giving him a redemption arc? A softer backstory? My heart and soul? Who knows.
Warnings: uhhhh lots of angst (i mean i tried), almost entirely canon compliant, vague-ish attempt at smut, mild cursing, insane use of italics. (Also: english is not my first language and im faking being a writer but i think this came out okay??? Pls be kind he's my lil babie!!)
Summary: I gave david york my heart and then proceeded to bash it with a sledgehammer - forgive me :p this is the same universe as What Love Means
Taglist: @fuckyeahdindjarin cause i wouldn't be writing without you; @chronically-ghosted thank u to listening to me cry about Dave, and my writing, and myself - i owe u my life; @wannab-urs you absolute maniac i adore u; @timelordfreya u were so kind on the accompanying piece for this i hope you like this too <3
David York
You've known that name for a long time. Stayed with the man that inhabits it even longer. He goes by Dave now. Lives in a suburban home. Has two daughters. An "office job". A respectable man. A good man. A little misguided perhaps. A little bit more jaded than he used to be. More broken than you remember. The light in his eyes all but snuffed out. But a good man.
He was always a good man.
Even when he was no longer yours.
Even when he was no longer David.
****
David York and his sunshine. Neighbours. Best friends. Light of each others lives.
You're two halves of one whole in a way that makes no sense from the outside, but when you tread close enough you can pinpoint the exact strands that join your soul to his. The way his heart is an exact mirror to yours. The way your smile reflects the sun in his eyes and his warmth leaves you feeling more loved than any being in the entire universe. You'd stumbled across him, buried between the pages of a book twice the size of his head, and you thought: Oh God. It's you. It's going to be you. And you decided you'd never let him go.
Until he decided to leave.
He's so excited when he gets the call. When he makes his plans and packs his bags. When he tells you all about the good he's going to do, the hero he's going to become.
"I'll be back soon sunshine. You won't even know I'm gone."
You try to convince him to stay. With everything you've got in you. All your jokes, all your warmth, all your schemes. When that fails you give him your heart. Your tears. Explain that you can't live without him. That he can't expect you to live without him and not fall apart at the seams because he's the thread that holds you together. And when you see the anguish on his face at your confession, you revel a little because you think you've won. He's going to stay for you because of course he is. He's your David. He cups your cheeks in his hands. Lips meet your forehead as his words break your heart:
"I'm sorry sunshine. You know I have to go. I have to do this. You know."
So you wipe off your tears and you smile. Because that's what you're supposed to do for a friend and that's what you do for him. Give him a hug and a kiss on the cheek. Tell him to be safe.
"Don't get your butt kicked too much David. I need you back in one piece."
And that's the first time David York turns his back on your smile.
****
You wait for him. Like the inexplicable fool you are. Wander aimlessly in the streets around your childhood home like a spirit too tired to haunt anyone but itself. Waiting for him to come back and spark you alive again. Awakening for the few weeks of leave he has before reverting to your state of nothingness the minute the door closes behind him. Flitting like a ghost of yourself, nothing tethering you to this place, but still incapable of moving on without him.
Because he was David York. Your best friend.
Your good man. Your solid rock.
Until he wasn't.
Until he left.
****
You learn to make your way without him. Stumble, fall and scrape your knees more than once, without him by your side clucking and fussing like the mother hen he was. Without him to hold you up and bring you close:
"You’ve got to be careful honey. I can't be losing my sunshine."
You find a purpose and make your stand into the big bad world but all of it feels hollow without him by your side. You learn to stitch people up, bandage their wounds, hold bleeding skin in place and snap broken bones back together again. He laughs when he finds out, equal parts amused and proud.
"Looks like you became the anti-Dave sunshine."
And you smile for him, because of course you do. You don't tell him that everything you're learning, you're learning because of him. Because of the sheer wall of terror that's settled in your spine since the moment he walked away. Because of the David that comes to you in your dreams. The one that crumbles in front of you; broken and damaged and begging for help. The one you're trying so hard to save.
You may be his sunshine, but he was always your sun, and you'll protect him, even if he doesn't want you to.
****
The David that comes to you now is not yours. He's an off brand version of himself. A cheap copy. An imposter that calls himself Dave and smirks in a way that makes your skin crawl. He wears Davids skin but has none of his warmth. The sunshine in his smile is replaced by an ice cold sharpness and you hate that shivers it sends down your spine. His eyes have lost most of the humour they used to have, and when he hugs you he lets go a little too soon. A little too fractured, a little too cold. You hold on; assessing, caring, and wondering. Go to ask but he shakes his head; the look in his eyes silencing your questions before the words can form on your lips. The worry in your heart worsens.
When he walks you home you try again but he anticipates it. Like the predator he is now, he sees your strike coming, and retaliates in the one way he knows will force your silence. He kisses you. Hot and deep. Steals the air from your lungs and the words from your brain. Renders you shocked. When you open your eyes it's your David staring back again and your relieved smile has him pushing into you again. He kisses you until you're breathless. Again, and again, and again, until all your worries are dripping unvoiced at your feet and all your questions have been sucked into the air in his lungs.
You don't fall into each other as much as you attack. The culmination of years of circling each other and it all comes down to this. Mouths open, teeth clashing like you're trying to make your way into each others souls. His hands grab you so desperately, so fervently, that you wonder how he hasn't moulded you into his own chest yet. Your nails scratching at him like you're trying to carve a home in his bones. You’re trying to tear pieces of each other apart. Him, so he may take you with him and you, so you never have to watch him leave again. You devour every inch of him so reverently that the taste of him may remain embedded in your tongue forever. And he carves his way into you, soothing an emptiness that only ever craved him. Pounding in like he's trying to break you open and consume the light within. You cling to each other in the aftermath, breathless, sated and smiling, and you remember placing a kiss on his heart right before you drift off in his embrace.
You should've known, in retrospect, that that was as good as it was ever going to get.
He leaves you in an empty bed. Runs away before the dawn breaks like the consequences of what you both did are too ugly to be faced in the light of day. You turn the apartment upside down looking for one note, one glimpse, one hint of him that's not mottled on your skin and going to be torn away by the cruel hands of time.
You take the dismissal for what it is when you don't find one.
****
He comes back broken. Purple shadows under his eyes, a split lip and a wince that breaks you when you go to hug him. The storm breaks and you lunge. Too strung out to keep going like this any longer and too frazzled by thoughts of "what if it was worse" to think about the consequences of breaking your silence.
Your fists pound against the rock hard of his chest. The place that used to be your solace, your comfort, your home. Where you'd set your head too many times to count and where all your dreams ever went to rest. And they've turned it to stone, moulded him into a machine, changed him into something he's not.
"You're not a fucking hero David. You're not. And I'm asking you to stop trying to be one. I'm asking you to stop this self sacrificial bullshit and come back. Come home. You don't need to be a hero. You just need to be alive. I need you alive dammit! Why can't you see how much I need you?"
Your voice falters and cracks. It's out there now, the pieces of your heart; ugly, tattered and split open in front of him. Waiting for his judgement, for his grace. His face twists into a grimace, and you turn your head before he can see the tears fall. You don't need his apologies. His empty words and false promises of how nothing will ever happen to him, because it will, you know it will. So you hold up a hand before he can begin.
"It's okay. I get it. This is your life now, right? So will you forgive me then, if I can't stand around watching you try to kill yourself and wait for the day you inevitably succeed?"
Something in his eyes breaks at your words, and something in your heart does when he gathers you in his arms. The kiss on your temple feels like a goodbye. To your one solace, your one crutch and the only friend you ever had. And you know this goodbye will haunt you forever.
That's the one time you turn your back on David York.
****
He comes back with an extra sparkle in his eyes. Pleads and begs his way into your good graces and you indulge him because that's what you do for David. His smile has never been brighter. He may call you sunshine but he has always been your shining light, your beacon, the lighthouse you turn to.
But then he turns away. And in a split second, your world tilts on it's axis.
Carol.
Her name is Carol. Perfectly normal. Perfectly sweet. Perfectly perfect. He's got his hand in her hand and you don't understand. You can't. You refuse. Except.... David. He looks so happy. So content. Looks at her with all the devotion you've only ever given him, and all the love you wish he could've given you.
"What do think sunshine? I think she may be the one."
You smile. Because that's what you always do for David. You smile. It's an ugly thing. Fractured. Broken. He notices because of course he does. You've never been able to hide from him, ingrained as he is into your very soul. His smile falters and his eyes fill with sorrow and regret. Apologies for all he could never be and all the regret he has about it.
"You did good York. You'll be great together."
He flinches. He has only ever been David to you. He knows he has broken something irreparable. Opens his mouth to fix it. To swallow something back, say something else instead. Change the words, the letters, the combinations of decisions that led you both to this very moment. Something to keep you whole but the parts he shattered, however unwittingly, are already crumbling to dust in front of him. He closes his mouth. Swallows whatever lingered at the back of his throat. You smile at each other as you walk away. Him with her hand in his. You with the cloud of pain that comes from finally accepting the bitter truth for what it is.
He's not yours. Not anymore. Never will be again.
You never call him David again.
***
You miss him. Of course you do. Running from him was like running from a part of yourself; impossible, regretful and pointless. You were intwined into each other too thoroughly for there to ever be a clean cut through. You couldn't really walk away from him completely no matter what the distance on a map points out.
You know he'll call when he comes back again. He does. Shows up at the threshold of your sanity and the hardest thing you've ever done is ignore his voice when it calls to you. Voicemail, after voicemail, after voicemail. You listen to every single one but you can't call him back. His voice is your kryptonite. You'd walk back the distance if only you could but some tattered remnants of your self esteem hold you back. The last one comes with a letter in the mail. The glossy embellished card reminds you of the reason you walked away. The reason you could never go back. He pleads over static and tinny phone lines:
"Come on sunshine. I need you there. I'm sorry. I'm so s-. Please. I- "
Silence for a few minutes before the line cuts off. Typical of you both. To never say what you want and yet be assured the other knows exactly what you mean. He probably knows too. That you can't bear to see someone else's name next to his. The thought makes you nauseous; angry in a way that scares you, an evil coiling restless being inside of you, threatening to do as he asks. Go over there and scream in his face. The audactiy of this man to say he needs you when all you ever wanted was for him to pick you. Over the chip on his shoulder, the gun in his hand, the name on that card. Choose you. Love you. But you can't do any of that. You can't stand by his side and smile as he walks away with another either.
His only mercy is that he doesn't show up at your doorstep when you both know he could and you wouldn't be able to close the door in his face. Not him. Never him.
You throw the card away without opening it.
He forgives you.
But he never calls again.
***
Months turn to years and David York turns from a stabbing ache into a memory and then a ghost. He haunts you initially, at every turn, but slowly, over the years, the voice in your head softens down. He vanishes into the fog that lingers at the back of your mind and you stop looking over your shoulder for him to come back. You left him so suddenly, so abruptly, that you'd torn off pieces of yourself too. But time heals those wounds and you gradually learn to carry on as half of your bleeding heart slowly scabs and scars over.
You carve out a content little place for yourself, in a tiny corner of the world as you finally learn to love the reflection in your mirror. There's grey in your hair now. Wrinkles in your skin and hands hardened over from a life lived serving others. Saving who you can, when you can. A melody on your lips as you collect the parcels from your mailbox. Cocoa and bitter coffee long since mask the taste of his name on your breath.
There's a knock at your door and you flit to open it. Your smile, a pale imitation of what it used to be, plastered on, as you brace yourself to greet a well meaning neighbour or two. It falls quicker than lightning at the sight that greets you instead.
A man wavers at your doorstep. Unfamiliar in his familiarity. The ghost of a memory of a love never forgotten. Dripping crimson over the smiley face on your welcome mat. A haphazard bandage concealing half his face. One hand clearly broken. Arm bent at an angle too sharp to be natural. Angry streaks of purple and blue dancing around all visible patches of skin and he's trying to be nonchalant about the way he's favouring his right leg but failing miserably. Wheezing a breath that you know speaks of atleast one, if not several, broken ribs. And yet, despite all the damage and destruction and sheer agonizing pain he's no doubt in, the man smiles. Full and bright and warm.
"Hey sunshine."
And you reply.
A gasp. A plea. A promise.
David.
****
#david york x reader#dave york x reader#raven writes#(again)#(somebody stop me already)#ok so this is quite literally my heart in a fic so PLS be kind#off u go bby#raven on her david york agenda#yeeting into the void and running away
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Woahhhhhhh new Mordred just dropped let’s go
I may or may not redraw Malinda tho, havnt quite pinned down how I wanna approach dragons, anywho obligatory @llamagirl28 mention for Bastard of Camelot, thanks for the blorbo to torture <3
#fanart#myart#digital art#bastard of camelot#interactive novel#as u can see the depression really settles in at 14#if MCR was in boc it would become his personality to distract from the horror that is his existence#but he’ll just have to settle for emo poetry#still haven’t gotten used to beards but eyyyy improvement bby let’s go
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