#u can talk to me about Anything ill probs get it

[maxthesillyy]

what do you think about the characters in Double Exposure so far?

the characters themselves arent that bad,, but i definitely cant say i really care for any of them yet. as in i wouldnt be that upset at any of their deaths

at first i was NOT vibing right with Safi at all considering literally all of her jokes are straight up hit or miss, but the more we learn about her (or. learn that we have a lot to learn) the more i’ve grown interested and fond of her. she kinda gives Way Too Excited For 8 AM Teacher vibes.

Moses is kinda intriguing to me right now, but is also pretty much a nothing burger,, i can only assume (and hope) i’ll see more about him after chapter 1. so. he’s kinda silly, thats about it.

OH Loretta. i hate her so much, she’s so funny, i love her. i always love to hate a good bitchy girl character. oh my cod— ESPECIALLY when the look she gives Max if u try to call her bluff. im definitely hella excited to see more of her— especially since she clearly brought out the more bitchy side of Max. honestly so far i think these two’s dynamic is my favorite. she kinda feels like Max, Victoria, and Rachel all smushed together.

then theres Gwen,,, the game’s definitely setting us up to be suspicious of her. i dont have many thoughts about her though other than that. shes hot ? kinda endearing when shes not pissed at us. thats about it.

Amanda……………. 😒 she exists ig. no fr though, she’s literally fine. she feels more like a quirky best friend disney channel character than a real person. and then theres with the game SHOVING her and max together… idk! maybe ill warm up to her. i dont want to hate her but the game is very quickly pulling me down that route.

oh then the other guy max can flirt with for some godforsaken reason?? Vinh is his name i think. i dont trust him, and i dont think were supposed to. personally i think it feels ooc for max to openly flirt with him back— especially so quickly,, even if she’s doing it jokingly or smth. like girl you were just either talking about how you can never recognize when youre being flirted with or need to take time before flirting back with someone— AND even then. you’d think max would be more wary of overly charming who show an interest in her.

which brings me to Lucas. im guessing if anything happens with him he’s gonna be a red herring. maybe it’s just me, but i wouldn’t be surprised if were supposed to be reminded of jefferson when we see him,, at least he doesnt have any real interest in her though.

pretty sure Amanda and Vinh are the only two love interests? either way i honestly dont think it makes sense for Max to be seeking either of them out romantically. this may be the Aro in me, but chloe was a realistic “love interest” in the OG game because well. they were Max and Chloe. and besides that Max was already with her basically 24/7, and was obsessed with her. they made sense. they werent forced or obviously placed there just to be love interests— it was natural.

honestly Amanda and Vinh just seem like.. love interests for the sake of love interests.

tbh any love interest for Max right now just feels,,,, maybe could’ve been the right person but WAY too wrong of a time. like i dont even see an interesting unhealthy dynamic— and if i wanted that i would just go to current DE!pricefield so.

this brings me to Chloe… im happy she’s haunting the narrative rn,,, could be doing it a little harder imo—but other than that im. trying not to form any huge opinions on the Max and Chloe situation. when we (hopefully istg decknine) get the whole picture ill probably talk about this more. im just pretty conflicted.. and also wishing decknine just CHOSE one of the endings (bay WHO SAID THAT) instead of leaving it open to not piss anyone off.

oh uh then Reggie and Diamond,, i dont have any thoughts about them really except for being mildly intrigued by the amount of attention handed over to Diamond. im guessing she’ll have more plot relevance later,,, but Reggie will prob stay a very side character.

i thinkkk thats everyone? OH. Yasmin. not much about her. can appreciate how much she cares about Safi’s murder. but yeah nobody else comes to mind,,, and if i did miss somebody i guess that just goes to show how little i think of them.

so i guess overall my thoughts about the DE characters are “we’ll have to see what happens.”

[cerealmonster15]

not 2 be dramatic but also it is my blog where i can ramble about what im feeling whenever i WANT!!! anyway i like. feel like something is fundamentally missing from my entire being or w/e lol. like. i mean there's a very high chance i have adhd which does explain a looooooooot of The Way That I Am and my struggle at doing and focusing on stuff and things and my rapid rotating around short interests in things. but like i also feel like [and maybe this is part of adhd idfk, i havent been Officially Diagnosed just a lot of therapists and friends with adhd all tell me i probs do lol] i just dont feel motivated to do things. and ive been this way i think a lot of my life. i realized a looooong time ago that i was not so motivated by passion but by fear!!!!! fear of failure or whatever!!!

fuckin adding a readmore bc i ended up talking forever lmao

like in school. i got good grades but i never really felt smart exactly. i was able to work really hard and spend a lot of time doing homework and whatever because i feared the consequence of failure. i didnt wanna get bad grades [not even from like a threat from home or anything, i just was afraid of the system lol like i didnt wanna fail and then snowball into ruining everything for my future or w/e. like i've always been kinda 0 to 100 in things like that lolol]

but like i remember going into college like "well i am interested in physics and compsci so i guess ill declare double major til i decide which one id rather do" but i didnt really have a clear goal. physics i dropped first because as much as i like the concept, the classes were still hard and i didnt have any idea of what i'd do with it if i did pursue it. comp sci i at least was like "well i like video games i could do something with that probably" but then i nearly flunked and dropped the class lol. my fault for skipping an intro class bc i was like "Well i learned a lot of the basics in high school" bitch u did not retain any of those basics. anyway i ended up swapping to digital arts under that same "well i like shows and games maybe i can do something with that" and that did ultimately lead me to grad school for game dev and learning what tech art is and all that. and i was employed as one for a lil while!

but then i got let go. and in the midst of a really Hard Time to be unemployd for gamedev bc of the mass layoffs ALSO happening over and over and over and over, so despite the fact that i have some industry experience, i have a significantly harder time even getting interviewed. but a lot of it is my portfolio - unfortunately the nature of the jobs i had didnt really net me much in the way of tangible portfolio work, and a quality / updated portfolio really is what matters in this field

and thats where i hit my problem. i really am not self motivated or like, creative. i dont really have ideas. a lot of my portfolio was school assignments <- stuff i had to do. stuff people told me to do. even now, i sometimes do vfx to help my partner with his solo game hes been making for years, and thats my main portfolio addition source because i need someone to tell me what they want. and then i also struggle to see the vision of that sometimes like ive been SO STUCK on a specific effect im making for the game bc im not understanding the vision and also im not really around other tech artists or vfx artists much anymore. not like in grad school lol. even at my prev job i was the main vfx person so i was kind of on my own floundering around to figure stuff out- and a lot of times i couldnt. there was no senior to guide me if i got stuck.

so when i'm just alone in a vacuum with nothing forcing me to do things i just dont. i LIKE vfx and shaders and even python, but if i dont have a thing where i have to follow specific tasks i just cant think of anything interesting or unique to do myself. even a lot of the python ive learned recently was from a udemy course, which helped a lot bc it was structured with little assignments, explanations i understood in small bursts, and specific projects with specific goals. one of those i did kinda expand on based on what i learned to make a portfolio thing, sort of. it's out of place on my artstation bc it's not really gamedev related at all but its python and it's SOMETHING. python is a tech art skill at least. i can replace it sometime if i have more relevant things but i just dont right now. i dont know what to make. i have no tool ideas, or even if i have a vague idea i just go "i dont really know how id do that" and dont feel motivated enough to figure things out or to make that vague idea even somewhat interesting. vfx i just go "i dont know how to make this look more interesting" and get stuck at unimpressive points if anything. i dont have the designer or passion part of the brain that i kinda need to survive this and it scares me. i like the structure and stability of being employed because someone tells me what they need. i dont know what i'm supposed to do on my own but im supposed to figure it out otherwise my portfolio stays stagnant forever!!!

so many times people will like. have a side project. they learn from those projects. they have a vision they want to see completed and they pick up skills for that thing. my partner is a big example with his game hes making - he could already program but hes learned a lot of the art needed to make it work, because he wanted to see the game made. people have like their comics or animations or games or whatever they do, hobbies, anything that they feel passionate about and i feel like i just lack that passion. scared that i like the idea of doing things more than doing them even if i do enjoy doing the things when i do them, but not enough to like, get myself motivated to lol. if that even makes sense.

like idk. i at least have martial arts - i did aikido in college and i do capoeira now- but it's stuff i can only do bc i have a regular group i pay and go participate in with other people. once i dont have those group settings i dont do it on my own.

ive tried to get myself to learn musical instruments so many times but once i stopped taking lessons for sax or piano bc i got busy with school, i mostly just dropped them. i cant motivate myself enough to practice on my own even tho i did learn enough fundamentals that i probably COULD if i just. cared enough i guess. i always had in the back of my mind that it would be cool, IN THEORY, to draw comics or make a dating sim/visual novel of any flavor, a virtual pet, a farm sim, whatever. but i dont actually have the vision for it. i dont have a story to tell. i'm not motivated enough. ive looked up several times ways i might be able to use python to make a lil tamagotchi project to practice but i just never do!!! maybe i know enough python from the udemy now that i could but would i?? idk!!!

people always say you learn best by just jumping into it. find something fun you want to make or do and then learn as you go. but i dont have passion. im in a vacuum. even with my fics, i still like writing my fics!!! but i slowed down so much on those. because before, i was writing them to share between my friend and me when we were first getting into twst and based off a lot of inside jokes and ideas bouncing off of each other lol. fics, aus, doodles, whatever. and we still talk twst but she isnt caught up to main story anymore and it's not as much of a thing we talk as often or deeply about. i think my doodles got a lot more boring as a result and ive had less ideas. but i do still love the characters so so so so much and i do have fics i want to write... but it slowed down and i dont WANT it to slow down. i get excited over characters and games, and it doesnt really help me in terms of trying to fuckin Get A Job or Learn A Skill or whatever but. like at least it's something. i feel like my doodles got more bland too like i just kinda redoodle the same stiff generic things over and over and over again forever

there are so many things i can just do a little bit of but not enough to be like. impressive. or hireable. or helpful or smart or knowledable or whatever. like i can crochet a little bit. i can sew a LITTLE bit to get some simpler cosplays but nothing fancy. im not motivated enough to push those further to like "make my own clothes" or a more ambitious cosplay even tho i like the base level stuff. i can program a LITTLE in python but cant motivate myself to figure out what to do with it. i used to know a little hlsl and i know some node based shader stuff but not enough to be super deep with it. like more than a non tech artist i guess but not enough to make things that really look all that good 😑 i used to do tech theater in high school, but only really knew the basics of the woodworking and lightbooth stuff, not enough/not kept up with where i could do anything with that now even though i enjoyed it then. i was in chorus in school for like five years in middle/high school and i took some basic piano and saxophone lessons but every time i try to go back to something like that im dusting off the cobwebs. i also have always had huge anxiety so i coudnt ever have considered a performance thing with it anyway. whenever i was in school chorus production musical things i was only in ensemble parts or at the very least singing with a small group of other people because i never had the ambition or desire or bravery to try and stand out lol. i liked being backstage. i started learning to rollerskate but i only ever really got to a point where i could move around without falling over and then as soon as i started capoeira i never touched the skates again. even though it was fun! i studied spanish for years and used to practice with my father but i barely ever do now, even thought i knew enough to go to spain on a school trip we still were in an english comfortable environment and i really could just fumble my way through simple conversations in spanish. i dont keep up with it enough to like, be able to smoothly translate more casual dialogue or whatever and as much as id really love to practice that more, i once again dont have the motivation or drive or even ideas for it. i have a few times thought learning portuguese for capoeira or japanese for just generic enjoyment of japanese games and anime and stuff would be cool but i do. not. stick. with. it.

i do notice lately that the other thing. next to the fear of failure motivation. it is the community thing. i do capoeira not out of fear but because there are other people i go and do it with. i pay for the classes, i enjoy the classes, i do the classes with other people. when i was in school i had other classmates doing the same things with me. when i was in tech theater or chorus clubs i had clubmates. music instrument classes i had the instructor / it was something my mother was paying for me to do / the instructor would give me homework to practice and i had to be able to report to that person the next week so i would have the incentive to do it [another failure thing i guess but still lol]. cosplay i do alone as i make it but then i see other people at cons. i hadnt done new ones in a long time tho because i wasnt going to cons, and the only one i made recently i also had the motivation and deadline of a con coming up that a friend and i were going to go to together and our cosplays connected. theres community. but right now i have no job to worry about failing at, and no coworkers to bounce ideas off of. personal projects are in such a vaccuum i just dont have the motivation or self discipline. even the udemy python thing, some lessons are more interesting than others, and it's general python stuff so rn the recent stuff is like, good dev stuff but not gamedev stuff; but i have learned enough where i probs could take it and run but i dont know how or why or what to do with it!!!

i dont know if im even making a point here i think ive just had these thoughts swirling around my mind and overwhelming me for. well kind of forever LOL

[candysharkart]

hi would u be willing to talk more ab ur belcher hcs that theyre all schizoaffective? :]

i can defs try! i cant promise i have really anything "smart" or insightful to say, cuz my husband and i just kinda draw from our own experiences :o

(if u are reading this and dont know what schizoaffective disorder is, im writing this w/ the definition of "a combination of schizophrenic symptoms and mood disorder symptoms like major depressive and bipolar disorder")

bob has felt the most schiz to us from the start, he's got his voices, which feel way more like he's acting as a mouthpiece for the objects he's talking to, rather than him just doing a bit. he knows its not "real" but also. it is to him. (i think hes also had some? hallucinations? but most are drug or stress induced and he also has a lot of cartoon dream sequences so...?) he struggles with paranoia and anxiety, and he's had pretty manic and depressive episodes in the show. i think he tries his best to stay grounded and self-aware with his delusions. he's very skeptical, and gets really irritated by misinformation. (probs also an affect of his autism tbh)

we also have a hc that he's more irritable and negative in the early seasons bc he's on meds that arent a good fit for him. (we dont really have meds hcs other than that. they might not be able to afford them)

linda's symptoms arent as obvious beyond her delusions like the raccoons and the cemetery stuff, but i think she's taught herself to suppress her issues so she could better support gayle who had more disruptive ones. her parents seem like the "stop being mentally ill its annoying" types. she has her own instances of paranoia and anxiety, but she mostly tries to smother and ignore anything negative she feels. VERY manic and impulsive tho. i think she also has some hallucinations in show but im drawing blanks on specifics.....

i would personally say tina is pretty depressive, but she's good at trying to cope in (mostly) healthy ways. her family is a good support system for her! she does have the most instances of visual hallucinations that arent cartoon bits (she seems to have them a lot when shes feeling guilty...) her anxiety and paranoia reminds me a lot of bob but also of gayle. they have similar outburts

gene has the least examples that i can think of.... i think he considers ken to be pretend and is just joking about him being real bc it annoys bob (compared to tina who thinks her horse Jericho is maybe...a little real) but i think he has some other hallucinations tht arent like that. hes surprisingly anti-social! he definitely often views himself as superior to the kids he knows. gets that from his dad lol. and his mania and impulsiveness are very much like linda :) he doesnt have depressive episodes as much as the others, but they hit him really hard :(

and louise! shes paranoid and has lots of aggression issues! to me she is also very depressed. (the puppet ep is esp relatable to me lol........) and she's VERY manic in the ambergris ep! i think she also has a couple instances of voices similar to bob's? but its kinda hard to tell the difference when shes still a kid who plays pretend with her toys. her talking to the taffy dummy feels more like what bob does tho.

i hope? thats the kind of hcs you were talking about? ive been trying to think of the right words for like 3 hours now. im very bad with words and so much of this stuff can also be attributed to other brain stuff, and one person can have a lot going on in one brain! so i hope i dont upset anyone with this post. thank u for ur time :)

[therosevest]

ok and now i need to talk this out on here cause like in all reality idc that much but this is just a little. awk. i might do this under the cut just so i can talk in a bunch of little paragraphs if thats chill ok ty

sooooo right ive mentioned that sam has been talking abt having beef specifically w his roommates but also that friend group at large bc they went on spring break trips w/o him. The roommate took a duo trip with fellow dyke and everyone else did like a big thing together erm

right thats just the context idrc except for the amount of times sams vaguely alluded to it and idk any other details. um but he has called his roommates like the 'poison pills' of the whole ordeal since they literally live together (but they havent been that close. prob since their freshman year when sam was out for a semester. which isnt inherently er bad but hes acting like hes been victimized for the last few years)

and like last night after this long sesh of working on our assignment sam and i r walking to the bus stop and he says something about finding out just like shitty awful drama and how it sucks having to live with 'two of those people' lmao sorry im not laughing im just like. whatever

this said i have plans to see. should i name sams roommate. ok i cant do that rn but we have plans to hang on monday and i would be seeing sam like immediately after for class. and esp if we're hanging out on campus like we might have a repeat of last time where sam spots us out and im not sure if he'd approach and hang this time. but hes obviously aware that me and them like chat

so it's like not so subtle that hes trying to get me to either ask abt the roommate or flat out not trust/see them anymore and i just havent engaged which might come across as "fake" but like. well ill be honest man theyre all a year younger than me and that doesnt mean much but it does feel very immature to handle things this way idk the whole story but im not gonna get roped into the like Omg i cant talk to this person bc of beef idk about...

and maybe i should feel worse abt not being #loyal to someone who is or at least at one point was considered a friend esp when it comes to someone that yeah ig he does know better than i but i dont... sorry ive been talking abt this bitch like cady and regina george except im not psychosexually obsessed im just like. hes been more insufferable than i remember lately yk.

i feel the Tiniest bit bad and like oh have i taken advantage of u bc yk we've hung and smoked and had dinner together often at ur place and def wormed my way into talking to the roommate via u etc but then i remember the way sam talks abt like anything and i dont feel all that bad

and theres this whole thing abt the eclipse i dont have plans to go see it it might happen last second but now after sams asked me abt it and messaged me like yeah idk we (him and his bestie) could maybe take a bus but we'd need a place to stay (asking to stay w my family bc i mentioned it like once on my close friends) and then theyre like going to a diff city anyway like oh my gooooood it's gonna be seen as shady and i dont really CARE i just need assurance that this is stupid as hell and its ok if im a little bit of an asshole about it. i dont think being mad abt the eclipse would hold up but w/e

has not been at the top of my worries and still isnt but now that this is all coming up in the next week im like frank g*llagher voice (sorry) oh Jesus Christ. you know

[miumura]

what do ur moots remind you of?! (ex. places, color, song, etc)

ooo another moot game ! tysm anon :) <3 ill only do a few cause im on a brainrot rn 😭😭

@flwoie — bad by wave to earth

bc u literally make my day 100% better. i always look forward to talking to you!! like you’re someone i can talk about anything with bc you wouldn’t judge me 🙁 like im prob on disc most of the time talking to u or waiting for a dm back. but yeah, i could never be bored when talking to you 🤗 love u lots pooks 🤍🤍🤍

@wvnkoi — one and only by enhypen

i was truly lucky to have you in my inbox (or for me to being in yours) 🙁🫶 like u acc put up with my bs and im so glad for that </3 U R MY ONE AND ONLY FR !!!! like who does it like u tbh … im always looking forward to our convos whether u think otherwise 🤍 but yes please be more active bc i cant be missing one of my ramyeonz 😊

@haknom — jolly ranchers but green apple

this is SOOOO random but HEAR ME OUT i love love LOVE jolly ranchers, just like how much i love you (ohhhh was that smooth 😍😍😍) which is a lot LMFAO. but i love green apple sm u dont understand…its pretty unexplainable why ure so fun to be with but us 08z r js like that!! UNBREAKABLE BOND!!!! #jolly-ranchers-w-soph-foreva #just-like-sola (soph + kayla .. get it)

@yeokii — nail polish 😊

listen hana ure prob like … erm What the freak!!! but just hear me out. nail polish isnt good for u (js like how ure not good w/ me /j) to smell but its addicting. thats like u and me cause ure addicting to talk to u (or make fun of) AND ITS GETTING OUT OF HAND!!! but its like a guilty pleasure soooo be glad i only had good things to say. love ya official 08z goofball !!!

@yenqa — strawberries

u just do 🤨🤨 like idk strawberries taste vary depending on the harvest / kind u get .. like sometimes u can be vv sweet and super kind 🙁 and then we have the sour kinds where u used to (and still do) hate on me and fight me 🤬 at least ure not bad like hana ALL JOKES but strawberries r a superior fruit so ure superior in my book 🤗🤗🤗

@yswon — hi-chew candies

hi-chews r too good n need to be talked abt more!!! js like ur blog (it deserves all the love) idk how to explain it, but u remind me of the candy in a way…like could be sweet if u pick the right ones 🙏 and u cant tell me hi-chews dont fit ur blog rn!!!! like its a comfort candy + super soft = amazing type of candy i tell u. nobody does hi-chew like this which makes u awesome n unique 😍 … what am i even saying urm but u get it (hopefully)

@soov — beaches

beaches r really pretty (just like you) and i really like how calming they can be. but sometimes, they can get violent as the waves of the ocean crash and could nearly drown u (js like how u could kill me w/ ur pics ohhhh) LMFAO but i really do love them!!! and i just get that beachy vibe from your blog too :)

guys i swear i was gonna do more than this but i really cannot think rn 😭 sorry i may have not tired my brain out writing (soph cb???) so its hard to come up w/ reasons why i think ure this etc etc. i could prob edit this post or js say in the comments what u remind me of if u do wanna know ^^ <3!

[heartsoji]

hello, everyone. its been a while.

im really sorry that i kinda dropped off the map with no notice and YES i've seen the sweet msgs dropped by anons and moots and its really sweet to know that people ive never even met think abt me and care for me. will be responding to moots privately shortly - anons, just THANK YOU SO MUCH it means the world to me that you care sm. if you ever drop off of anon, i'd love to be friends :)

ANYWAYS, the reason(s) i sorta disappeared: just some family issues! my family is going through some problems with some certain family members going through a really hard time, falling into frail health, you get the gist. it hasn't been exactly lovely, but we're working things out rn and hopefully it'll get better soon. i kinda got caught up in everything and sorta forgot about my little community ive grown here. my apologies for that.

um sorry for this lowkey rly dramatic and overly lengthy msg but i didnt rly know what to say now that ive dropped off the globe with no signal of being alive, and i feel safe enough in this community (yes, the wonderful tumblr anime SIMPS u heard me right ugs (and me tbh) R SIMPS. community.) that i dont feel the need to just hide away my problems and just say smth like, "oh i got locked outta my tumblr account!" or smth idek. i trust ugs! love these ppl ive never even met <3 (more than some of my irls, even. some of them dont know that anything happened LOLL)

MOVING ON, i'll try to be active, but no promises! i cant say fs that any real work will be put out for a little while, but the biggest lump of the issues is over, and im in a better mental space now, so i can probs do some things? idk. at the very least, ill be doing some interactions and rambles and more abusing of my "jisu talks!" tag. i love all of you, have a wonderful morning/day/night! <3

[generalsmemories]

Hii not a request, more a ramble bevause im insane, but just came from a stressful college day (was asked if i wanted to go home so haha…obv.) and I’m so done and well maybe it seems like a request but I’m fr curious what jingy’d do like when you’re having a panic attack.

Specifically because I don’t want to be touched during one but I feel like the assumption will be that he’d just hug you and (even tho id probs want that but LIKE THATS ME ITS HIM YOU KNOW WHAG I MEAN AAAAA) like you know (do you?)

Okay sorry I’m a mess, so when I have panic attacks I go non-verbal. (I might be autistic) And like all i do is apologise and cry and hyperventilate and id love a hug but hate it at the aame time. And I feel like he’d know yk? That like if youre not into physical touch, he won’t touch. And if you are okay with it he will…. So hed ask and id nod? BUT THEN ALSO NO BECAUSE ID CRY EVEN MORE WHICH SUCKS AAAAA.

Or: i just want him yo be real and exist and hold me because im touch starved but I also dont because then hes real and I cant do anything and i cant talk and then its all fucked up because bad communication and haha mentally ill.

Sorry if this aint your tea i jusy feel its so normal bc all my friends havw this shit so we share the most insane stories and jokes yk?

Anyways much love <333

dear god anon i hope you took a nice rest when you got home from college- rememeber to put your health first before anything else! you can't flourish or give it your all if your body is ready to collapse any second.

I recently graduated earlier this year (around may) so i can totally understand the stress, but treat yourself well and i hope you got the very much needed rest. also don't be sorry, i get you and not wanting to be touched in such a vulnerable situation. well sorta anyway, i can perfectly initiate physical touch with others, but when others try it with me it's always a 50/50 chance that i will not even let them touch me or pull away after a few seconds HAHA (friends and family alike).

but as for how jing yuan would react i'm pretty sure he would notice pretty quick - he has quite a good eye for details after all! he pays close attention to everything around him, so picking up a few habits of some people would be a piece of cake for him. but if he's unsure i'm sure he would be the type to actually test the waters, if you're able to talk under such panic attacks he would softly ask and then just stay by your side as a presence if you were to confirm his suspicions!

if you weren't able to confirm or deny anything, i think he would try first. not go straight for a hug, but place a comforting hand and test the waters ya know? and if you were to first say yes then later say no he wouldn't question it - if anything if it stresses u out more after he would just placate you with the same :3 smile he sports.

BUT REMEMBER ANON FROM ME PERSONALLY!

don't put yourself down like that, battling mental illness is already a struggle in itself. you're already doing plenty enough by getting by each day! and judging by how you can still joke and talk about it with your friends, you already have close people who would probably stay by your side willingly to comfort you. you're not alone, but if you ever want to drop by again in the near future and ramble you're welcome to!

i would gladly chat with you again (و •̀ ᴗ•́ )و

[cubedmango]

Hey naina, tried to rewatch the cherry magic movie tonight. Got up to the nagasaki scene. It’s currently paused,,, I have cried genuinely. non stop since I pressed play? My head hurts really badly I think. I’m gonna try again tomorrow I hope you’re having a lovely day

(other ask under the cut for length)

KUROSAWA SAYING WHEN YOU DIDN’T TURN TO ME I WAS SAD AND THAT ONE FUCKIN TEAR THAT FALLS FROM HIS EYES AND THE WAY HE LAUGHS AND APOLOGISES FOR BEING A MESS I NEED A NURSE like i’m gonna. Die i’m two seconds away from throwing up my heart why would he. Why did they film a movie with such intent to tear me to the ground the way he can barely speak and has to try and gather himself multiple times with deep breaths before speaking and ends up crying anyway the way adachi looks on helplessly wondering how to comfort him and let him know how much he loves him the way. The way he tries to bridge the gap between them with understanding through touch one of kurosawa’s main love languages the way kurosawa’s eyes are so glossy and doe like as he waits for adachi’s kiss the way he says his name so softly the way adachi rests his hand on kurosawa’s knee and their hands find each other so slowly…, so softly… so tenderly… the way they can literally speak 636373 words with just their hands alone and do way more for the sake of romance and true deep mutual love than anything the way none of these are in order of how they happen because my brain is seeping out of my ears naina what the actual fuck were they thinking..,, machida keita akaso eiji and kazam hiroki you will receive my medical bills shortly i’m. I wow so. cool

PLEASE IM CRYING KFJHSDKFHDSJF ALL OF THIS IS SO REAL??????? cm crew put Smth into the nagasaki scene idk what but its insane like i will never Not be feral when i think abt it ...... kurosawas breakdown is so painful to see hes been holding everything back for So Fucking Long and imagining all the events from his perspective is crazy like think abt it. he has no idea if adachis ok or not and none of his calls go through and theyre so far apart like Imagine . the fact he wasnt like full on bawling in that scene means hes still holding back so much probs for adachis sake its so aaarhrrhGHGFGHF!!!!!!! LET HIM CRY MORE PLEASE.......

adachis side was perfectly analyzed in that meta i rbed earlier so i have nothing substantial to add but god for the 58302th time his Growth ..... even in ep 12 he had to get that push from tsuge to go meet w kurosawa but in the movie he could already tell kurosawa was putting up a front (and literally predicted it would happen as soon as he got the transfer offer) and he probs planned on talking abt it when he flied back to tokyo before the incident which is. ... .. and the look of determination on his face the entire time kurosawa finally broke down w no panic no overthinking like "I Am Going To Love And Cherish This Man So Hard" and comforting kurosawa w touch and no longer caring abt the magic that hes become reliant on for kurosawas sake. . Yeah im going to be ill about these two for the rest of my life thank u cm crew god bles <3

[tetzoro]

hihi precious aimsies!! im glad you’re feeling a bit better, im sending a big ol hug your way to heal you with my magical aimsies sickness go away powers !!! >_< AWEEEE oh my goodness, YOU AND KUROOS BACKSTORY?!?? HOW ADORABLE!!!!! that’s so silly how you both were pining for eachother T^T and then you’re just like “erm… what are we?!?!” BCUZ SERIOUSLY!!! kuroo seems so infatuated with you, warms my heart to see how adorable you two are (kuromy forevaaaa!! FAVORITE SHIP ITS CANON!!!!)

TEEHEE help!! of course ill tell you about me and kou, you’re spoiling ME right now!! >.< me n kou don’t have tootoo much of an interesting backstory (the lore does tend to change… sobs) but i will indulge since miss aimsies asked!!

basically we met back in highschool, i was super duper shy when it came to people i didn’t know </3 but i had seen him once in the courtyard and was like “°-° who is that fine man…” HELP.

i ended up seeing him around more since we were in the same grade, i accidentally quite literally bumped into him looking for a club to join (made a fool of myself i was super embarrassed, but hey beefy chest!!) and obviously, he suggested the volleyball club <3 took some convincing but the coach thought “hey, we could use another manager with bokuto on our team!” LMAOO!!

anywhosies, i joined as manager and got realreal close with the team (and obviously had a huge ginormous crush on bokuto) but kept it veryyyy quiet because i was too nervous to do anything… sigh. i only told the girls!!

one day i was just talking to the managers about him, and SOMEONE☝️ (konoha) overheard me !! he didn’t think twice before blurting a little too loudly “you have a crush on bokuto?!” UGHHH KONOHA AND HIS LOUDMOUTH!!! </333

everyone was just dead silent and i just walked out of the gym… i was so upset and embarrassed i didn’t even know what to do sigh. (little did i know the girls were absolutely screaming at konoha for it, poor guy HELP… and akaashi was with bokuto like “wtf just happened…”) but kou got super excited about it!! he had a big huge crush on me the whole time and i had no clue yet SOBS

kou eventually found me and gave me a big huge hug telling me the feeling was mutual in his own bokuto way <3 i was so close to sobbing because UGH he’s such a sweetheart i could smooch him forever and ever, i was so shocked and my shy self was just like “oh he likes me back and im kinda dumb! HE’S ALSO HUGGING ME RIGHT NOW!!! WHAT DO I DO!!!!” WAHHH (and i forgave konoha, i couldn’t hold a grudge to save my life!)

and yeah that’s a lil tidbit of just one of my favorite silly cliche backstories to think about teehee!!

not me practically writing a whole fanfic with this ask right now… um whoops!! but EEEP ILY AIMSIES, i hope you have the bestest day/night evaaaa and im looking forward to more of our chats teehee :3 youre the BEST!!! big huge smooches to you >.<

- :3

HI HIIII ^_^ WAHHH U ARE SO SWEET !! im already feelin much better thanks to your magical powers <3

PLSSS kuroo and i are dummies and unfortunately fall under idiots to lover trope … mostly bc im the idiot LMFAO !! but hey .. it all works out :3

YOU AND BOKUTO ARE SOOO SO CUTE STOP !! please i feel you sm on having it change all the time bc !! its just so fun to explore all the different ways you could meet your f/o :3 blooping them into different aus and different kind of meet cutes eeep !!

but the manager to lovers trope .. oh i love love love that for you guys hehe EVERYONE YELLING AT KONOHA MADE ME LAUGH PLS !! he’s prob just like ??! what did i say … i thought everyone knew …

im glad the girlies had ur back tho <3 and the HUG !!! HOW SWEET !!!! i know he gives the best hugs ever and will just scoop you up into his arms all the time bc !! he can teehee :3

you guys are everything to me please 🤧 im living for the fanfic LMAO i ate up every word you had to give me !!!! i sincerely love our chats so much !! everytime i see your like ‘ :3 ‘ i get so GIDDY !!!! my lil pal :’)

[minniepetals]

long msg (maybe?):

AHHHH so glad cmar is back 😭😭 been baking all day for family and cfriends so i wasnt able to see ur post abt its release AND when u released cmar💔 j so glad ur back and cmar is back🩷 cmar has me feeling so many emotions but ngl sometimes i also feel a little desensitized from reading sm angst in cmar😭(?)

alexander reminds me sm of my grandpa, he gives off such a warm vibe. A little prediction for alexander: i think hes the man standing behind karl ( hope m not wring and got the context clues right bc this would be v embarrassing rn😅) if oc acc kills karl right then and there or hurts him, alexander wouldnt say a thing and would have trusted him right there that he would do anything to her (if theres a plot twist and u acc make him hate oc i will be crying !!).

and if so !! i imagine oc going back to korea barely scathed and would take alexander’s adivce and get a dog. i would see her get a cutesy little puppy maybe to heal her inner child (like she gives in a little to her past self and lets go a bit j as alexander says) and absolutely adores her pup. THATS WOULD BE THE CUTEST THING EVER. but i also see her getting a big dog to keep her yk baddie energy through and through (but within the walls of her house or when no one looks she would probably baby her big pup).

I can see her abs loving her pup and probably going berserk on anyone who would harm her pup. u would prob do smthing like kill her pup off j to make us feel smthing.. and she would 100% go on a rampage after finding put who killed her pup🫡

and ofc this wouldnt be a cmar ask w/o tellings u that i hope the boys and oc makes up in the future. doesnt have to be soon or anyt i still have the urge to choke the cmar tannies (j a little). AND i hope they find put abt mc soon and go through abs hell as everything unfolds infront of them little by little. THE GUILT THAT I WANT THEM TO FEEL. yk. i acc imagine them finding everything out through a risky mission through their inears or smthing but idkidk its all up to beloved author (u, ily.)

if any of this. ur acc planning to write m sorry ill stop talking mb.

but on that note !! hope ur doing the best !! hope u feel amazing !! i want to tell u that ive probably read everytimg on ur masterlist alrdy and have repeatedly gone over “a thousand springs” and cried everytime.. i also abs miss ur drabbles ahuhu. but ur health and happiness is what matters most !! take ur time writing !! we wuv u (*˙˘˙)♡

okay i'd like to first point out that the man "standing" behind karl is not alexander but actually y/n's father oop-

"It feels like being in the presence of your father all over again, in the face of danger, of a manipulator, of a gaslighter, of an abuser. He returns hard and so vividly in the form of anger, in the form of a ghost, a spirit whom you see standing right behind Karl. He stands as still as ever, hands held behind his back, simply watching."

to explain, it's basically y/n hallucinating her father being there in front of her again the moment karl laid his hand on her.

will she kill him? will she not? i mean either way, he's dying so... 🫢

also the idea about her getting a pet sounds good lmao. i even thought about it while writing but suffice to say, we won't be introducing another animal character into the mix. the idea is really nice tho, like i just imagine her getting a big black dog who looks menacing, kinda like the way y/n in until the last star falls had cerberus (though in the of kai lmao). BUUT, when you think about it, her "guard dogs" are basically the reapers and i don't really feel like adding another concept into cmar's complicated character building lmao.

also you're getting some one-on-one with jk next chapter who yay for that 🥳

[mysicklove-main]

Is there anything else you wanna rant about with “your new pack” ?

u just want me to make-out with u don't u 🙄 🙄🙄

but yes sure i can talk for hours, especially since im working on the next chpt currently. (might take bout a week to post tho considering im so busy)

for everyone else not reading this fic, I will post your requests and other stuff after i finish the next chapter!!!

to begin with, i dont know how the hell to make everyone have equal amount of time shown. I want everyone to like all characters, but i accidentally write way more for specific characters than others which is unfair i feel to my (very fictional characters who dont give a fuck) boys. for example, think bout how much we see Keigo compared to Izuku. Its just hard to do it with 5 different ppl so.

I want to rewrite all my beginning chapters bc I feel like i rushed it thinking it was going to be a short story. But here i am, 79k+ words in and the beginning i feel is so so so bad. like i can't even reread it bc i cringe. but i am also so lazy and rlly dont want to rewrite it lol so i just pretend it doesn't exist.

comments, mean way too much to me. Like all writers i love getting a notification that someone commented on my fic, but now its getting to the point where im like, "damn this chpt didn't get many comments, did i do something wrong?" so that's embarrassing and i def need to chill and be grateful for what i have. Im working on it.

Eijiro, Izuku, Shoto are so fucking hard to write and Katsuki and Keigo are so easy to write. Its so strange that im struggling with Izuku, bc he is my favorite, but im trying to show that he is a little fucked up from his past but I also dont want to write him as super quiet. Idk i feel like i kinda brushed off his trauma and i didn't mean to. so that sucks. with Eijiro his actions are easy, simply cause i wrote him as someone to be very touchy and affectionate off the bat. plus he talks alot so. but his internal thoughts are so fucking difficult to write. like what are you thinking bout?? you know she is your mate, but he is trying to get his best friend to get with you. it is so hard. Shoto is the complete opposite. I dont know how the hell he would react in different situations, bc he is more quiet out of the boys, but I want to also show that he is also trying his best too. his deranged thoughts are easy to do, but everything else is a wreck. i think he is the hardest to write for by far.

speaking of shoto his character is so inconsistent. idk if ppl notice, but i do. in the beginning his is more obsessive and has the most negative thoughts. he kinda crazy, u feel me? now, i dont write as much of his creepy perverted thoughts. i just kinda forget to. so now he feels kinda bland and i need to figure out how to bring back some excitement back to his character. maybe this chapter ill go back to the creepy, obsessive, thoughts. it was so fun to write. this all goes back to how hard shots is to write.

I switch perspectives alot and I hope ppl understand what's going on and who is thinking what. I think I have a mix of second person (obvi, with the "you") and 3rd person. bc i narrate others reactions to the situations, and kinda treat Y/N as a character in the story, not as your self. does that make sense??? idk.

since hybrid stories are my fav, i would like to write more, but in different scenarios. for example, another Y/N x Wolf! Katsuki fic, but this katsuki would be a diff one from the other wolf katsuki in Your New Pack. Like i did with the Bunny! Izuku Headcannons. That izuku is diff than Your New Pack one. but would ppl be bored of it?? ik i will never lol.

i wish i could post a poll on who ppl like the best on ao3, just bc im curious who has the most fanboys. (it would prob be keigo tho lol)

i got bored of katsuki wearing the muzzle in the house, so i just trashed it. def poor writing thing to do, but idc at this point, it would throw off my plans for chpts if he was always wearing the muzzle.

sorry i talk alot, but hey u asked for it.

[iiota]

i find it very shocking that pokaymon fans are like 'if only devs had more time to fix the graphics and glitches the game would be one of the best' and that the game isnt busted to its core...(granted this would be solved by having more time)

sorry i have to elaborate or ill die bc i have quite a few qualms with it (long)

one looking at its selling point is that its open world + that you go to school thats why u have to wear that stupid outfit the whole time. The open world is..so bare there are no unique spawns like arceus and like 4 cool spots in the WHOLE MAP. its so easy to get lost bc its big just to gloat that its big, theres No landmarks and the map is very unhelpful orienting urself...also ur bike moves so slow and it Cannot move faster bc the game almost dies when ur boosting as is (and half of the time ive seen the climbing Does Not Work bc the mountain areas are terrible) not to mention in area 0 they take ur map and let u loose in this open world and its so hard to find anything..esp if u want the paradox pokemon u search for hours only to find out they have semi unique spawning points. also the legendaries are the coolest ive seen i will admit but theyre sooooo detached from the story which could be cool if the school wasnt so ass to be in b cthats where u learn about them. oh btw theres really only two things u can find on the whole ass map and its gimmighoul coins(bc u need 999 of them for a pokemon bc ofc u do) and random items/tms so if u dont want either of those things exploring just..wont be on ur radar its also impossible to know if ur getting a potion or a rare candy only tms are marked yellow which isnt Really a problem i actually like it but there are still like no rewards for exploring.

also the items u find almost render stores useless AND trainers are pretty hard to find u could consider them ur reward for exploring but again. the game puts little effort into making ur want to fight them bc all u get is an item for doing it in each area and u can just grind with the visible spawns that way And since theres no rubberbanding its like..what point is there once u beat the game to get all trainers in a lvl 20 area unless ur training up pokemon (but in that case ur probs just doing tera raids to get the rare items)

another qualm is that u go into like. 4 buildings the whole game. and the building insides are the best looking thing in the game besides the school main foyer..ugh. the town design to me felt very hollow bc its like..bc the gyms all look the same and are business-y a big part of the town lost its personality. also its very noticible that theyre trying to bounce off how cool the galar gym fighting was with the song and having a crown but it um Really ended up being pathetic its like the base part of pokemon games was an afterthought(actually it felt really obvious that everything in this game was super split up so instead of focusing on a coherent pokemon game it was section off into bits that strained the team) i have a lot of issues with how ur friends only exist within their storyline until the post game..there is no way to talk to arven unless u do one of his story quests. i think running into nemona just on the roads would have been fun or anyone that you can catch up with really! that or just have them at the school when ur back..

THE SCHOOL. GOOD LORD. the song that plays when ur in the town and school sucks so bad i cannot imagine listening to it longer than like 5 mins. now functionally i do think the idea of the classes having helpful tips for pokemon would be kinda cute esp for newbies but um. ok if a game is like omg u went to school and now u get to get WHEREVER U WANT freeroam are you gonna remember to come back to the school whenever u beat a gym(specifically i think gyms unlock more classes) are you. are you really. i think the only push to go back is one of the teachers being like 'try my class ^_^' yes i am completely convinced. the school itself is like. pathetically trying to be persona and giving u motivation to come back by having stuff locked by classes or telling ppl about ur adventures so u cant speedrun it(unless u decided to do school stuff last) literally could be so easily fixed by having to report back to someone In the quest to the school forcing u back so ppl r like well since im here ill take an art class. also dont lie about the classes if u say its a math class name it..something that its actually about (technically Math but its in relation to how pokemon deal damage)

also a lot of the gym leaders are um. boring. it doesnt help they lost a gym to customize and only get a challenge thats like a few mins of ur time. their designs are ok but only like rhyme, grusha, larry i can remember the names of LOL. i think rhyme, larry and maybe the art guy are the most compelling bc they have like. interactions with other characters. the elite 4 is pretty cool but i dont..really like that they had a kid. objectively its a little funny but im like oh god ppl are gonna be weird about that. um was extremely disappointing fighting them in a plain ass room. and u just fight geeta on the roof. ok at least xy had STAINED GLASS BITCHIN ROOMS. interview was fantastic tho. part of the questions were stupid bc it was grading u on something objective.

i do like the idea of getting to know the ppl around the school and encouraging the nurse to get a teaching degree again was cute..but it has little impact when half of the conversation is blacked out bc they dont want to show u explaining ur journey to here bfhdskjbkf. like no choice in the game matters is it that hard to have a couple of prompts of what to tell her. honestly i also think for classes itd be cooler if they happened randomly and you had a prompt to auto join them ie 'an art class is starting would you like to fly back to school?(Y)' also a good reason why a lot of the school stuff falls flat is everything in this game is in neat little categories that have no relation to each other its like im eating dinner and i dont want my peas to touch my mac n cheese. i dont mind that ur set up to fail some quest lines w not knowing where to go bc u Can ask for advice on where to go but also most of the playbase probably took advantage of do whatever u want but ALSO the progression makes no sense bc it wants you to go back and forth throughout the entire map...i do think pausing the gym fights to do team star and then do more gyms then do arvens stuff would have flowed a bit better..sometimes letting the player decide what to do is bad.

team star is probably my fav storyline bc it involves something other than ppl being focused on u so it stands out a lot also i do think it was cute for them all to have banded together from bullying. that being said the running around and throwing ur pokemon out to fight was . stupid as hell. just make it a gauntlet, maybe some double battles. that way the camps didnt have to be so ugly and Open. they have the best music tho

tera raids are objectively the most thought out and best looking but they need help for 5 or 6 star unless ur really good and its..so hard to do them online bc everything fills up so fast ive heard the game also gives u little indication of whether ur running towards a 3 star or a 5 unlike swsh. the more real timeish battle does uh. make ppl think the game is crashing bc some actions are forced/scripted but dont tell u so ur game is just frozen for x amount of time..

a more petty thing but the clothes suck ass and theres no little fun customize thing like the trading cards from swsh..u can just change the photo on ur trainer card...ok anyways this is already too long <3

wait i need to say i dont mind arven now but i think him suddenly losing his backbone when his ai parent said his parent actually loved him and being like omg woah really was. boring and stupid. he should have told them that he didnt believe them THEN after been like 'i am not sure if that ai was only telling me what i wanted to hear or if it was actually what (parent) believed but there is no way for me to know i can only move on and focus on whats really important. I am going to (enter job title here on something he wants to study for) and take care of someone who was really there for me (pans to mabosstiff). And also you! My friend thank you!'

rika rules tho. my only complaint about her is no mudsdale

[foreverisntenough]

1. what was my favorite chapter and why:

i don't think i have a favorite because i liked too many... but the one that comes to my head first and the one that probably marked me the most was the one in which jude's diary is revealed. idk i feel like that was it for me, to know how much it actually meant to him. ill prob switch when i re-read 🤣

2. ⁠do you go back and reread any specific scenes?

yes! when the angst starts and then they get back together, my faves.

3. ⁠did u have a favorite character?

i mean i loved the main couple but can i say teddy... her cameos in this story were too cute!!!

4. ⁠did u like or dislike the smut?

loved it!

5. ⁠what do u wish happened in the fic?

i think most of the things that i wanted to happen, happened. maybe more drama with gabriel, make jude a little crazy

6. ⁠did u think it was too long or too short?

i wouldve loved to read more about how they navigate their married life, kids etc but i totally understood why the course of the story had to end there. hopefully we get one shots 🥺

7. ⁠was there anything unique in this fic compared to others?

it was very well written. each character... i hadnt read fanfiction as serious as this one in years and that felt so nice. i just loved it

8. ⁠did u like when links were included?

yes!!! it added so much more to the story. pls continue doing it

9. ⁠did the fic go as you wouldve expected?

yes!

10. ⁠was there anything u hated?

nope

11. ⁠was there anything u loved?

i loved jude i loved her i loved them sm everything seriously

12. ⁠what was the saddest or worst bit to read?

i feel like this one is pretty obvious 😭 when he cheated on her ughhh. both the sex and the party when she was upstairs (ik thats not cheating itself but ykwim)

13. ⁠what made me the happiest to read?

when they said i love u to each other for the first time 🥺🫶🏼

UGhhhhhh the girlies that respond >>>>>

Thank you so much for this feedback! It is everything to me!

a few things... I jut love love and whether thats in the form of Jude being sad in a diary of Teddy clinging to Judey... it just makes me smile so I love to know other people get that whilst reading my works.

I think I could do one shots of sort of an epilogue of their futured, if people would read. I'm fairly locked into Movie Night atm but i will need a breather eventually. and Maybe Act II epilogue is it.

I agree about the talking to the girl at the party! i feel like because it was so innocent because he didn't 'do anything' it like hurt me more for her. I don't know that one stung me because Y/N was falling, finally letting her guard down and Jude's out there actively trying to do anything but that 🥺🥺

I like to think he made up for it though.

TYSM for reading and messaging.

[miumura]

moots who would have a crush on (idol)??

ooo this is interesting!! ill do a few moots that have interacted w/ me on this app currently 💪 (or at least i remember..)

@wvnkoi — heeseung. without a FUCKING doubt. she talks about him a little too much … literally look at her pinned post . hes there ! claims im her jake to her hee so that explains it. but ngl i think she’d have a crush on sunghoon…suits her psycho awesome vibe 😊❤️

@flwoie — hyunjae. she literally has a tag dedicated to him why would she not have a big crush on him … also went feral when he showed his abs SO LIKE

@haknom — jaehyun. like all i remember is her talking abt him … like she would def spam any type of gc or pms to share ANYTHING abt him. kind of obsessed if u ask me 😊😊😊

@flwrshee — heeseung. prob kicks her feet every time someone brings him up OR sends something related to him… i see it. i know who you are. 😊😊❤️❤️

@yenqa — jay. jay is literally her bias and YES i can see her having the biggest fattest crush on him. she already does btw .. jay suits her vibe too!! like you’d tell me he is her type n i would believe it cause they r like this 🤞 feeding into ur deluluness + include me too 😊❤️ BYE LOOK AT HER TUMBLR HEADER / IMAGE TOO 😭

@tnyhees — heeseung. ik i said heeseung for some other people already …. but heeseung. i feel like u would talk about him nonstop and have a little acc where u just talk about him 😊 i would too so i get it

just me feeding into my moots delusion so they think their biases and them r meant to be ❤️❤️

hi guys interact w me more pls im not scary 😊❤️

[unauthorizedmagicians]

Season 1 Episode 1 - Unauthorized Magic

this ended up being so long and they prob all will be tbf

Foreshadowing the time-loop from the very beginning huh? I see how it is.

Q’s mental illness being his first and last motif.

I forget how good the soundtrack is.

How exactly did he get institutionalized? Is he self-aware enough to submit himself or did his parents or what? Anyways moving on

Also, he takes a drug that's not even for depression its for OCD and phobias so maybe that's why it's not working huh…

I wish we had more of the books throughout the series. I think it's really interesting that he’s narrating it. Very much so mirrors his true belief in Fillory and in magic in season 4.

Ah yes, forgot Jane was a massive homeschool kid and was so blunt.

Julia makes me so upset in the early seasons. “You can’t run away hard enough, can you.” Firstly, shut up. Second, he admits this in the trials. Third, Quentin also does the thing where he just doesn’t tell the people in his life about his mental illness and therefore the coping mechanisms he uses look like childish escapism to everyone around him.

The contrast between Julia in the first episode telling Q to get real versus like 5 episodes later going batshit over not having magic so maybe just can it actually.

I feel the need to specify but I do not hate Julia as a character at all. She just pisses me off in the first like episode and a half or so. Like until she’s got her shit sorted w magic and the importance of restraint and all that she’s just judging everybody for everything like she’s better than so yea.

QUELIOT MEETING

“Am I hallucinating?” “If you were, how would asking me help?” ICONIQUE

Penny being a “don’t cheat off me” person in his first scene is so out of character but yk had to introduce him ig

Apparently started new meds. Yea ok. They started him on OCD meds? Alright then. They tried everything ig

Ok so she hurts herself to change the circumstances around the memory spell. But we know that this was all on purpose and Jane made sure this was what happened, that she didn’t go to Brakebills but she knew about magic so she could become stronger. So did he just not do anything?

Oml the fucking score. I could talk for hours about the score. The silence before his anger starts building, the small wind as Fogg riles him up, the deep souring as we see the shadows looking like moths on the wall, the regal brass when he builds the card castle that looks suspiciously like the one in Fillory. just. all of it

The garden path…

“You haven't been depressed, you’ve been alone” LIES. BULLSHIT. LIAR. he just wants to capitalize on ur pain and if ur taking ur meds ur not in pain so u cant cast magic but ur telling him what he wants to hear so he’ll give them up

“Nerd boy dragon porn shit” hehe little does he know

QUELIMARGO MEETING

The garden path…

The lighting in this show reflects how Q views the world. Overexposed: hope and all that shit. Underexposed: death and nihilism and all that shit

QUALICE MEETING

Hate that ship name but dont know a better one

ORLIYODI MEETING

“The answer is yes, til you pass out and  then again when you wake up.” “Did you just read my-” “nah, its just a guess” ICONIQUEEEEEEE

“The world is inherently unfair, act accordingly” one liners from day 1

Q being a little shit about Julia getting hte short end dsflkjdhgkds hate hate hate hate incel shithead hate hate hate hate sorry i was projecting from the book and only a little bit from the show

Why does he stand so close to Alice when he goes up to her

AND SHE JUST LETS HIM

Penny and kady r so married from day 1 its so painful

How does Q not know what dubstep is???

The end of this episode is absolutely brutal and nobody can react like at all

Also this last scene i cant tell if Fogg made the coin fall, if quentin did it, or if the beast did

[trikanoid]

My thoughts during the final palace and after finishing the final palace in Persona 5 Royal

Be warned, there are spoilers ahead

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i cant believe the supposed “bad” or not true ending of persona 5 royal is not actually the correct ending

it seems so happy and perfect with how it looks, most games would consider that the true ending but ig coz the games theme is rebelling against an unjust society and the sorts, it wouldnt be right for marukis world to be real, they even voice acted it and put so much effort into an ending that would usually be avoided if u wanted to finish the game, god damn p5r is written pretty well

and once i beat the final palace, i pre much have 100% achievements and moving onto p3p 🤔 and then probs after playing thru p3p twice to get 100% achievements, ill be replaying p4g

even crazier is that jokers teammates dont actually notice anything about the world they were given, only joker and akechi notice or know about it but joker is just praying that the ending chosen was a good ending

and then i can kinda understand marukis ending coz like a world where no one gets hurt. in marukis palace theres a part where u answer a questionnaire or multiple and one question where it had something to do with ur goals with the answers being “continue trying to reach ur goal”, “do whatever it takes to reach ur goal” or “give up and move onto a new goal/dream” actually made me realise that i usually take the easy way out in most things 😢 its kinda sad, id go for the final option and usually give up and move onto another dream/goal, which also explains why i never get addicted to have anything im rly passionate about since ill just give up when i hit a slump or just cannot progress aaaaaaaa p5r is so good

but the biggest problem with marukis ending is that ur happiness is just given to u, u dont think at all, uve got one singular path laid out for u to follow and while i find that decent and nice, its also rly fun and nice to struggle and come out on top, tho for me i usually only do those things for simpler activities such as coding, im fine with struggling with figuring out how to code something coz at the end its just so satisfying to figure it out and make it work, but at the same time, i wouldnt mind a path laid out for me since im the type of person to go with the flow and follow alongside others, but im also pretty neutral so while idm it, id also not like it and would like a path that makes me want to struggle and want me to reach my goals/dreams 🤔 aaaaaa theres so much to think about

tbh never thought a game would make me wanna type this much about it but after reading the comments of the “bad” ending, it got me wanting to share my own opinions but didnt wanna do it in the yt comments

like no cap if marukis reality were real, it would be great coz it means ur friends who suicided would come back, cats and dogs would live longer, etc and then i could have my best friend who suicided come back to life and while thats great and all itll also mean the struggles of coping with his death would disappear, it would mean id spend less time trying to catch up with ppl, thanking ppl for talking with me, letting ppl know i cared and id go back to the person whod disappear every once in a while, never thanking anyone for games, never thanking anyone for anything and making people question whether i rly found it fun to hang out with them or whether i cared about them much, so much to think about 💀 but i can genuinely understand where maruki is coming from where he doesnt want anyone to be hurt since id like the same 😢

he truly is the goodest bad guy