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woozi · 4 years ago

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Hey I have been thinking of making gifs but i have no idea where to start so I thought y not ask a fellow carat who makes awesome gifss❤️

A little guidance would mean a lot!!

aww, anon!! thank you for coming to me for this. i love talking people’s ears off!! DFJKJDFKDF but that being said, i’ll keep this under a keep reading since i’ll go through things quite thoroughly!

there’s really a million and one ways to make gifs, but i’ll show you how i do it and the basics in general (+ maybe some alternatives). keep in mind that i use windows though, so i’m not sure how helpful this will be if you’re on a mac. anyhoot, i’ll be dividing this tutorial into 6 parts, namely sourcing, choosing a program to resize/import with (vapoursynth and/or KM player basics), photoshop basics (KM Player tutorial extension), sharpening, coloring, and exporting.

the primary issue with sourcing is that the videos we want to gif come from different sources, and not all of them are conveniently downloadable. i’m going to list a few different sites/programs (that are free! <3) which allow me to download them!

4k Video Downloader: this program allows you to download from multiple sites, but i mainly use this for youtube. it’s better than other online alternatives (such as y2mate, which you can use if you can’t download this!) since it allows you to download above 1080p and also allows you to download subtitles if you want to. make sure to download it as .mkv though because options above 1080p will not show up if you’re downloading in .mp4!

Soshistagram: this is my go-to vlive downloader! it also allows you to choose the quality of your download.

Twitter Video Downloader & Instagram Downloader: exactly as their name implies, lol. twitter and instagram don’t really provide HD videos so i don’t mind downloading them through these. (the 2nd link also enables you to download from a number of other sources!)

Inspect Element: when worse comes to worst and if you're incredibly desperate to gif something that cannot be downloaded from any of these, you can (almost) always rip it off from the source code, lol. i won’t get into too much detail about this since so much information about this is readily available on the internet!

as you may have noticed, i’ve been mentioning quality for a lot of these. while being able to download content may be the priority, it is also really important (maybe even equally important) to download high quality resources. it’s not a very good idea to gif from anything below 720p as they usually don’t come out as nice, so to get videos like these, i usually go to either the sources themselves (e.g: their official youtube account, music shows’ respective youtube accounts, studio choom, etc.) and if i won’t be able to find them there, they’re surely on our beloved and reliable rosebay (who provides almost every svt content out there! people usually go here to get performance stages and huya streams, but almost everything is literally here, lol). you can also find performance stages on kpopexciting and kpop24hours (which requires membership, so watch out for when they open registrations up!). that being said though, it’s quite hard to find sources for chinaline, but legohouse is the best for this!

when sourcing from fansites, always check if they allow editing first! if it’s not explicitly said, you can always ask them. (most of them reply :D) if you don’t know how to, here’s a good guide for such! thank you @hanwooz for making this guide. <3

it’s also worth noting that performance stages and a few other high quality content come in .tp/.ts files which you might need a different media player for. for this, i use vlc for everything! this is also available for mac.

sometimes, you might also need to extract files (as sources compress them to take up less space during upload). i use peazip to do this! it’s a great AND FREE alternative to winrar.

you might also encounter download limits on gdrive. you can simply make a copy of the file, put it in a folder, then download the whole folder.

on to the more interesting part, we finally start making our gif! for this, i use photoshop cc (i downloaded it here lol) and vapoursynth OR KM player. these aren’t the only programs you can use, but these are what worked for me and my old 32-bit laptop, lol. you can find 64-bit and mac alternatives on the links as well i believe, and if not, you can just do a bit of digging around those sites!

(additional notes: another alternative for photoshop is GIMP but i don’t really remember how to use it. photopea’s also a web-based alternative, but i can’t say much about it since i haven’t dabbled there yet. there are also add-ons for photoshop such as topaz, but i (again) cannot use those, but i heard that they help a lot with making gifs look clean! avisynth is also an alternative to vapoursynth, but vapoursynth has added features i believe)

gifs are basically just moving pictures, so you can either capture moments you like as a video or as a series of images. photoshop accepts both, but as for me, i cannot import videos directly to photoshop so i do them frame by frame. to capture these images, one method is processing them through KM Player.

km player is basically a media player with a feature that allows you to get snapshots of videos continually (therefore, the series of images).

step 1: simply go to the timestamp of the moment you want to gif (i usually watch the videos first and type out all the timestamps of all the moments i want to gif) and press CTRL + G

this window would then show up. you can choose where you want your snapshots to go by changing the folder that’s highlighted. keep in mind that you need separate folders for each gif! if you don’t change the folder, the new screencaps would overwrite the frames you previously captured. as for the image format, i only use either PNG or JPG/JPEG, as they capture the best quality from this media player. PNGs take a lot longer to capture though. the numbers to extract tells you how many frames it would capture. i set it to ‘continuously’ so gifs don’t come out choppy/look like they’re skipping. it’s almost the same principle with the other panel named frames to extract. as for the rest, just make sure to follow every setting on screenshot! (you can always explore/experiment with the rest of them later on)

step 2: afterwards, click start, and play your video. your laptop might get quite slow when this process starts.

step 3: when you’ve gone through your timestamp, press 'stop’, and go to the folder you previously chose!

your folder should look similar to this:

simply erase all the frames that you don’t want to be included in your gif, and you’re ready to import! we’ll be keeping these aside for now and learn another way to get frames.

another alternative is to use vapoursynth. to me, this is a whole LOT easier and basically does all of the work for you. i really recommend this! ever since i got it to work just a few months ago, i can never really make gifs without it anymore. i use the old version though (rip </3), so i won't have the new preprocessors, denoise filters, and sharpening. i suggest you always take the most updated one because i heard they make a lot of difference output-wise!

bear in mind that vapoursynth uses python, so if you encounter some errors, it might just be that you don’t have it downloaded yet. just follow the instructions here! (for the longest time i couldn’t figure out why my vs wouldn’t work and it was because of this.... lol)

it’s very important to know tumblr size dimensions when it comes to gifs (whether you’re going to use vapoursynth or not), but i’m including it on this part since it’s crucial to how vs (vapoursynth) works. your gifs may look good on photoshop, but if they’re the wrong size they’ll inevitably end up blurry on tumblr unless someone clicks on them. here are the dimensions (image made by @dazzlingkai):

you can use any height for these gifs, but these are the width dimensions you need to follow! **UPDATE: the middle gif for a 3-set is now also 177px!

nibreon has a video on how to gif using vs, but if you like text better, i can also provide it step by step for you.

step 1: to get started, simply drag your file to the vs shortcut (entitled “vapoursynth (drop video file on me)”). and this window should appear. (i’m using hoshi’s spider mv for this tutorial btw!)

simply encode your chosen timestamp (in this case mine is 00:02:02) and press enter. (i don’t really trim my videos as other CCs do and just send them straight to vs, haha.)

step 2: this second line then asks you how long you want the video to be trimmed/previewed for. if your timestamp is 00:02:02-00:02:08, then what you’ll encode on this line is 00:00:06. (basically the duration of the video/part of the video)

step 3: after it processes, this resizer will then show up in your default browser.

this is where the size dimensions become important! choose the size of your liking and resize the video as you want. i find resizing much easier with vs as you have more control over the size with real time feedback.

additional notes:

opacity: just allows you to view the area outside of your size width. doesn’t really matter much, but i love it as it helps me precisely resize gifs especially when i don’t want to include captions/subtitles.

preprocessor: refers to how vs would process (lol??) your gifs frame by frame. this is crucial to how your gifs would look! it is explained very well and thoroughly here, but basically, it tells you the speed and the manner in which the images/initial video of your gif will be exported in. this one doesn’t matter much on regular videos, but for performances (.ts/.tp files, etc.) it does make a lot of difference. i usually use qtgmc 60 slow on performances. for the rest, i use qtgmc 30 fast (or 60 fast when there are very few frames just so they would run smoother). i’m also always on resamplehq (the second part of preprocessing)! a lot of CCs don’t use preprocessing for regular videos though (.mp4, .mkv, etc.). if it’s still unclear for you, i’ll include more tutorials and examples (although very few) at the end, dw! **UPDATE: i’m now on the 64bit ver. as i’m using a new laptop, my preprocessor is now debilinear (instead of resamplehq). i also am now a changed woman and discovered that you really don’t need to use the fps preprocessor for regular videos BECAUSE they’re not rendered “splicely”, it just takes more of your time. they look exactly the same. <3

denoise filters: smoothens out your gifs. very useful especially if the source is grainy! i always use KNLM for this but you can try BM3D as well. bm3d takes much longer to process though!

sharpening: pretty self-explanatory. it just makes your gifs look clearer/sharper! i use finesharp almost always set to 1, but it really depends on your preference. i also do additional sharpening on photoshop most of the time though! **UPDATE: recently changed how i make gifs and i don’t use this sharpening anymore because my preferences have changed, but it’s still a good place to start if you’re just beginning to make gifs!!

step 4: after this, go onto the vs window. the lines of code initially look like this:

but in order to process the video for gif purposes, we need to use vapoursynth’s plugins. you can modify this later on (which is really unnecessary, but it’s possible if you want to experiment more fjdjkdf), so for now, just open up the included script from the vapoursynth folder (gifs).

if you’ve downloaded vapoursynth directly from their site and not from the link i’ve included, this won’t show up in the folder and you’d have to assemble it all yourself. this is what i meant when i mentioned that you can modify vapoursynth’s plugins yourself! i’ve never seen anyone do that, but just so you know lol.

your code should now look similar to this:

note: you can also lessen the ram usage of vs so your laptop won’t lag as much!! just follow what line 9 says <3

step 5: then, copy and paste the text that’s in the upper right corner to vapoursynth. you must paste it after the 13th line! it should look similar to this.

step 6: just press f8 (or go to script, then encode video). this window will show up.

this is what you’ll usually do if you want to save it as a video, but since i can’t import videos, i change the preset to ‘export to png sequence’. some CCs like trimming the video here (as you can see at the bottom, there’s a label for the number of frames), but just like what we did with KM Player i just export it all (by pressing start). make sure your header is also set to Y4M if you’re exporting to PNG!

step 7: you’ll see all of your frames on the vs folder and if you didn’t trim (like me jdsjdskj), you can just erase unwanted scenes (just like what we did for KM Player)! if you’re making more than one gif, transfer these pngs to another folder (or rename them) as in the case of kmplayer. you need separate folders/names for each gif as not changing the folder/name and exporting again would overwrite the frames you previously captured.

and this is where it ends for vapoursynth!

now that we have all the frames ready, we’re going to be using photoshop and get all the fun stuff going!

KM Player is a lot more tedious (can’t believe i used this for more than a year omg), so we’re gonna have to do a few more steps and pick up from where we’ve left.

step 1: import your frames by going to file, scripts, then ‘load files into stack’

step 2: click browse, select the folder you saved your frames in, select all the frames, click enter, and then press ‘OK’.

step 3: your workspace should look something like this. click create frame animation (if that doesn’t initially show up and your window says ‘create timeline animation’, just click the little arrow beside it and switch it to frame).

(additionally, if you don’t see the timeline below, you can enable it by going to window, then check the timeline option)

step 4: make frames from layers.

step 5: reverse frames.

step 6: the trickiest part of giffing from km player!! (thankfully, we’re only making 540px gifs for this tutorial) estimate the area you want to include, then crop your canvas by pressing ‘C’ on your keyboard or selecting the crop tool on the toolbar (it’s the 5th icon here on my screen).

**UPDATE: you can also crop by ratios using the crop tool as seen on the screenshot below!

after cropping, your workspace should look similar to this.

step 7: and now we FINALLY resize like barbarians :D i always like shortcuts (which you can prob tell by now) a.k.a the easier and more convenient route, so just click ‘CTRL + ALT + I’ so the image resizing window can pop up. alternatively, you can go to image, then image size.

now set the width to 542 (which is 2 pixels larger than tumblr’s required width) and press ‘ok’.

step 8: as you can see, there are weird white/kind of faded pixels on the outer edges of the gif, and that’s the exact reason why we needed those 2 extra pixels from the last step. you can remove this the hard way by zooming at 1800% and removing 2 pixels per side or we can always go the easy route and press ‘CTRL + ALT + C’ (or go to image, then canvas size) and then resize the canvas width to 540 (don’t forget to remove 2 pixels from whatever height u have too!) <3

step 9: now we have a clean and sexy gif. you can completely stop here, and start exporting, but coloring and sharpening make all the difference (to me at least)!

as for vapoursynth, you only need to follow steps 1 to 5 (aka importing <3)

these steps aren’t ‘necessary’ but these are the essence and what makes tumblr gifs tumblr gifs (aka prettie <3).

there is so much potential with sharpening alone! usually, if they haven’t used the sharpening settings on vs, CCs may choose to do it through photoshop (although i personally always do additional sharpening on ps even if they’ve already gone through vs) by converting these frames into a smart object. you can do so by:

step 1: press ‘CTRL + ALT + A’ on your keyboard. this will select all of your frames IN THEIR LAYERS (not the ones on the timeline)

as you can see, they’re all highlighted on the bottom right panel.

step 2: place all of them in a folder by clicking this one!

step 3: then, convert your frame animation into a timeline by clicking the tiny icon beside the ‘forever’ loop.

it should look like this afterwards:

step 4: now we finally convert to smart filters by clicking filters, then convert to smart filter

which turns out like this after being converted

step 5: now sharpen to your liking! go to filters, sharpen, then smart sharpen. these are the settings i use, but i usually just play around with them until i like what i see. i won’t go in depth about this because there are a lot of tutorials that talk about this (which i will link some of below!!). the most important part to adjust is the amount and radius though!

again, you can stop here, but i like adding a bit of glow to my gifs, which is done by adding gaussian blur (another filter)! i learnt this method from this tutorial. i don’t think i can add any more to it as it’s perfectly complete as is, so i won’t be elaborating anymore!

additionally, if you don’t want to do all of that manually (although i suggest you learn how to do it manually first), there are available sharpening actions you can see around the internet. just choose one that’s to your liking! here are a few of them. you can also save your own settings as an action if you don’t wanna do them repeatedly.

my personal favorite! this is what makes the giffing process so rewarding for me. for coloring, adjustment layers are your best friends! you can try messing around with all of these.

i usually use selective color (my beloved <3), levels, curves, saturation, exposure, vibrance, color balance, photo filter, channel mixer, and gradient maps (not specifically in that order). i won’t actually do a specific tutorial as coloring extremely varies from each gif (one psd/coloring might work for another but may look absolutely horrifying on one lol, this applies even to frames that are from the same video!!) but i’m just going to give a few tips and refer to a few tutorials that might help you out!

generally, the more colors there are in your gif, the bigger the gif size will be. this is also important when you are exporting! (gifs that have very few frames with a lot of color and gifs that have up to 200 frames but have very few colors in them can actually save as the same size)

if you wanna lessen the file size and noise, gamma, and off-set are your best friends! (make the gifs a bit darker) you can also delete a few colors as shown in this tutorial!

i used to be unaware of this when i was a new gifmaker, but be careful of whitewashing! dreamy (@scoupsy) has an excellent tutorial that combats this. annie (@imjaebumaf) also touches a bit more on this!

resources are always available for you to learn! one good way of learning how to color is by seeing how others also do it, and that is through their psds. i really love izzie’s (@coupsnim) colorings, and she recently put out a set for her blog’s anniversary too, so you can check that out! <3 i’ve also seen a lot of psds here from tumblr resource blogs, and deviantart has really good ones as well.

i don’t really have things i keep in mind other than those. just have fun and i’m sure in time it’ll turn out great! again, practice is everything!

last but not the least, we address the speed of the gif before we export! it’s the decimal places under the frames on the timeline. make sure that you select all frames if you want a consistent speed! you can always play around with it though.

for 30fps gifs, i usually do 0.03 to 0.035. photoshop shows 0.035 as 0.04, but i’m pretty sure it isn’t the exact same speed as 0.04. as for 60fps gifs, my speed ranges from 0.01 to 0.025.

and finally, we go to the settings themselves! i used to take exporting settings very lightly, but lately i have realized that it also impacts the way your gifs look by a lot! to export, press ‘CTRL + SHIFT + ALT + S’ on your keyboard, or simply go to file, export, then save for web.

there are so many ways you can play around with it, but here are my current settings.

the color reduction algorithm (i.e: adaptive, selective, etc.) is one of the most important things as this determines the quality and color table of your exported gif! it really differs for each gif, but lately i lean towards the adaptive setting as i like the way it has been making my gifs look.

also very important to remember that tumblr’s current gif size limit is 10MB so make sure to keep your gifs under that size!!

you can also remove a few frames/skip every nth frame to lessen size if you’re running over the limit. :)

to show you how different each process will make a gif look, i’m including some examples (actually the ones we were working on during the tutorial!) to demonstrate a bit better.

this is specifically for an mv, but this tutorial has been really long now jdkjkfdjkfd so i will link down resources that show examples of it w/ performance stages (you can see a much bigger difference here)! also note that the vs one has slightly lesser frames (they could have the same frame number and size but i didn’t wanna redo it lol 😭). again, the .035 indicated is the speed used.

i know this is a bit much for an intro, but i wanted this to be a one-stop guide so you won't have to scramble for more resources. however, if some parts are hard to understand, here are a few tutorials that might help! (1, 2, 3 by @jinims, 4 by @soonhoonsol, 5, 6 is another general tutorial but i find the sharpening part especially helpful!)

and a few more resources that helped me out when i was beginning

sparkle tutorial

sparkle action

blurring captions

**UPDATE: my own sharpening tutorial <3, update 2

**UPDATE: my own color reduction algorithm tutorial

i hope this was helpful, and i can’t wait to see your gifs! <3

#a bit all over the place but #i learnt all of this on my own and through tutorials as well but i hope this at least makes sense!!#this is literally everything i know ig lol #don't hesitate to ask if some parts are unclear <3 #all of this is also intimidating at first but i'm sure you'll get the hang of it!!#it's really just dexterity sdksdjk trial and error!#i hope i didn't forget anything? i might also edit this if i find the need to/i rmb to add smth <3 #i didn't know tutorials took this much time omg i respect tutorial blogs even more now #literally took me more than 4 hours omg and i know u can tell the exact moment i started losing it #edit: i put those tags on while i saved the draft but i literally sat here for 5+ hours making this but it's worth it and i really enjoyed!!#i'll proofread this tmr it's 3 am now and my brain is fried from uni too <3 #anon #y.ask #flashing tw #ok i just proofread this but it already has 20 notes that's so embarrassing <3 #u can literally witness my sleep deprivation #anyway it's fine now i think (or my sleepy brain thinks it is)#i'll prob revisit this again tmr #y.psd #y.tutorial

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genuinewhy · 3 years ago

Text

cracks knuckles. winces. i’m sleep-deprived and running on adrenaline. u know what exhaustion does to a mind like mine? extroversion shudders and upgraded incoherence

there are thoughts. lots. let’s hope i’m coherent & the ideas are intact.

OKAY FIRST. So I’m mainly an isamira advocate but Camilo's potential as a poly element thooo. Or just someone who would incite jealousy for the fun of it because he’s a little shit like that. Take this as you will.

----

Imagine this: Mirabel and Isabela chilling somewhere in the casita, but definitely not in Isabela's room. Okay, forget it. The point is that they’re together: Mira settled comfortably between Isabela’s legs, her back against the other’s chest. Mira’s sewing a pattern on something, a cactus or something suspended in the air as a reference—

(Isabela, “I’m not going to hold this for u, my arms will fall off”

Mirabel, “it’s fine if u just grow it on the ground, u don’t have to hold it—”

Isabela, “no, come here”)

—but there’s absolutely no use for her hands other than for the purpose of occasionally brushing her fingers along the skin of Mirabel's arms.

Camilo saw them, had a lightbulb moment, shapeshifted into Isa, and then leaned close to surprise/scare Mirabel. But before he could get close enough, he’s already eating petals, and out he’s ushered of the room. Isabela looks at Mira and huffs at how she hasn’t even looked up from the damn thing.

Isabela, “Really? Two of me and you’re still not distracted? My face?”

Cue Mirabel with the ‘was someone feeling lonely’ look, and then an onslaught of snuggles.

----

It’s a drawing idea I had a week or two ago but my ability to draw only comes around every fifteen to eighty business days.

I’ll put the original prompt below. The one I made before I transformed it into an isamira one.

A settled between B’s legs, semi-backhug cuddle. A’s reading/knitting/something and they’re really invested in it. C comes in and attempts to distract A by giving them a kiss and it works—A practically melts into the kiss slowly, slowly until their eyes snap open, realizing they’re in the living room and their friends/family are literally just one turn of a head away from witnessing their mini makeout sesh and true enough, they (friends/family) are looking away or giving them the look.

It was for the PDA prompt on madrigalcest week. I went off the rails, as you can see.

#isamira #madrigalcest

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lowestechelonabomination · 2 years ago

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good evening. heres your o overcoat askliveblogging notes:

- the first paragraph is already so cinematic wtf ech

- at this point im gonna turn this into a film myself

- "people were weak by nature; he knew that lesson well" heyyyyyy echie is that a reference to dazai abusing him heyyyyy ☹️

- THEY TALK TELEPAHITHICALLY OH MY GOD

- frilly neck thing he could never remember the name of

- I THINK HIS SOCKS WOULD HAVE CATS AND PUMPKINS ON THEM

- god i wanna draw rashoumon in an apron now

- ITS LIKE A MOM HAHAHAJAAHHDDH

- "take ur melatonin u sick overworked bitch"

- god his thought process is spot on echelon this is gorgeous. dazai teaching him that actions always have a negative consequence and that he needs to be taught a lesson is so awfully heartbreaking

- dude its like he gave birth to his ability i LOVE this

- GROCERY STORE UWWWAAAHHSHFHF

- RASHOUMON MOM CANON

- gin laughing 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

- OH MY GOD. GINS DEAL. IM GONNA LOSE T HELP ME HAHAJAJAHSHHD I LOVE THEM SM

- "A flower born in darkness could only ever stay in darkness because anything light that dared come near would instantly be tainted." oh my lord.

- he totally liked that plush

- okay ive gotta say i LOVE your characterization of akutagawa. the way he is trying so hard to not yell at the cashier is spot on, especially considering that he probably doesnt know proper communication skills. you. oh my god /pos

- oh god this cant be good. not dazai

- PLEASE I HAVE TO KNOW WHAT TACHIHARAS NAME WAS LMAOOO

- "The day Dazai left the Port Mafia was the day Akutagawa snapped. It was as if something holding him from within had crumbled away, and the shards dug themselves into every part of his soul." i cant even emphasize how much i love this bit. i wanna carve the words into my arm and stare at them for the rest of eternity

- originally i thought that chuuya wouldve sent him the basket, especially because he mentioned akutagawa being sick towards the beginning, but now dazai makes sense. also i LOVE how you word akutagawas mindset throughout the fic. its obvious he has trauma and i just adore how you arent portraying it as seeking approval and rather being immature and mentally painting dazai as someone bad because thats all he knows

- he refuses to believe that dazai had changed and was becoming a better person. its gorgeous. my god.

- KATAI??? YOU PULLED OUT THE B I G GUNS MFER OH MY HAHAJAJAHSHDJ

- my jaw is wide open btw i was NOT expecting him

- "you think a VPN can stop me?" said every pirater ever (me)

- KATAIIIISISHSHUEHFHFHFJFJF

- ECHELON HE SOUNDS JUST LIKE HOW HE DOES IN KUNIKIDA AND KATAIS BRILLIANT DAYS IM GONNA CRY I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

- watch: its tachihara. boom case solved.- akutagawa has autism pov

- I KNEW IT I KNEW IT I KN E W W W WIT WAS CHUUYA

- chuuya shit-eating note 💀💀💀💀💀

- ohhhhhhh gin my girl i love them so much i love gin 🥺🥺

- SLEEP DEPRIVED AKUTAGAWA LETS GO MFERS

final thoughts:this was a gift from god, truly. this is easily one of my favoritest fics ive ever read to this date. akutagawa's persistent villanizing of atsushi and dazai is perfect, and his anger is just so hdhejhskajsjfjfjfshdndjfjdbd i cant even. i love this so much and i have no words <3

ajhsdjkhsdksdhkds literally grinning at my screen as I read this :D :D :D

I'm so so glad you like the first paragraph because starting paragraphs are one of the hardest things to write and usually turn out to be not the best :'). I had a sketch of Rashoumon in an apron somewhere but I can't find it *sobs*. I never actually came up with any of their fake names because I was lazy, but Tachihara's fake name is basically the equivalent of "the peepee poopoo man" or something similar. unfortunately I don't think I did Katai justice in this fic because I wrote this before I read Brilliant Days, but I guess he can have some dumb jokes as a treat. also autistic Akutagawa so true

anyway, if you're curious and have the time, you can go back and try to find all of the tiny, subtle things I hid in the actual text. most of them are about how Akutagawa refers to things

also THANK YOU THANK YOU THANKYOUTHAKNYIOU SDJHGFKSDKLDSJ :DDDDDD

#i will be thinking about this ask for the next several days thank you #ask #o overcoat

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thegeminisage · 3 years ago

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top 5 moments in broken road?

i literally waited until now to answer these ask meme questions so i could do this w/o spoilers. anyway time to do an ask meme i got questions for THREE ENTIRE WEEKS ago

#5 - "my girl" john/mary reunion

Mary rushes forward into John's waiting arms. He gathers her up and holds her close, pressing kiss after kiss into her hair, tears running down his face. "My girl," he says, in aching disbelief, drawing back to cup her face in his hands. "My girl." She laughs through her own tears, and when he smooths one gun-calloused thumb under her eye she turns her face into his hand, and then he draws her close and kisses her, like they're the only two people left in the whole wide world.

look. am i valid? no. but they compel me. to them their story is just as real and longlasting as dean/cas is to us. so i added a little gutpunch to that reunion because it’s my fic and i get to do what i want >:) actually, even though i made a point of calling john “dad” and mary “mom” in dean’s pov, in this moment, i deliberately used their names - it’s more than just mom and dad, it’s theee john and mary winchester back together after all these years. no, they don’t stay that way, but after a 22-year quest in her name, it still deserves to be like a Reunion.

(other four are below the cut to spare ur dashes. there are major spoilers for the whole fic, just warning u)

#4 - john getting punched by [SPOILER]

Dean's shoves his father with all his might, yelling, "Let go of me!" Partially because even though just moments ago the dungeon was exactly where he wanted to be, he absolutely doesn't want Dad to be the one to put him there, partially because he's afraid that Michael is about to break free from that cage in his head and vaporize everybody in firing range, and partially because he's afraid that if Dad doesn't let go, Cas will kill him.

But Dean's only got one hand free, and Dad's grip is too strong. Michael and sleep deprivation have made Dean weak; he can't get away from Dad on his own.

Then, when Cas is still just out of arm's reach, Sam lays into Dad with the fiercest right hook Dean's ever seen.

Dean knows that right hook well. That's one of the first moves Dad taught him, one Dad forced him to practice a thousand miserable times—how to stand, when to turn, where to throw his weight—until he honed it to absolute unthinking perfection. And it is perfect: Sam nails Dad right on the jaw with all six feet and change of muscle, sending him staggering back, his grip on Dean slipping free.

Dad slumps against the wall for a moment like he's literally seeing stars, like it's all he can do not to pass out. His nose looks like it might be broken. Dean rounds on his brother; if he was expecting Dean to thank him for that, he's going to be disappointed. "What the hell, Sam?"

But Sam's looking at Dad, not at Dean. "He said," Sam pants, "to let go of him."

i’m normally very anti-punching john, but i feel like if anybody has the right to do it, it’s sam. he’s spent his whole life being protected from john by dean and he finally gets to return the favor! all his problems are solved because he’s literally the bigger man now in every way! i doubt sam would ever punch john on his own behalf, but it is UTTERLY in character for him to do it in defense of someone else, but i bet it was pretty fucking cathartic too. picking sam moments in this fic is like picking children but this...you know, it wasn’t even in my outline. it happened organically as i wrote. and it just. feels right.

#3 - sam telling john to clean up his mess

"Seriously, Dad—we've had enough of your lip service. You're sorry? You want to help? Clean up your mess."

What? John frowns. Does he mean Dean?

But, no—Sam twists and picks up an actual mop and bucket from the corner behind him. The bucket is full of red-tinted water. "Go in the kitchen," he says, "and if Dean says you can use the sink, run some clean water with bleach. We gotta get the blood off the floor, because the longer it stays there, the worse it'll stain—especially on the hardwood."

"Uh," says John.

Then Sam gives him a severe, no-nonsense look that nearly punches the breath from John's lungs—because for the very first time, he sees his Mary in that stubbornly unimpressed face. "Do you understand? This isn't a motel. You can't expect someone else to do it for you. Don't go in the kitchen," Sam says slowly, enunciating every word, "unless you're going. To clean up. Your mess. You want room service—there's the fucking door."

THERE’S THE FUCKING DOOR. i love this bc firstly i believe in man of the house sam and secondly it falls into the same thing of like...sam is finally big and strong enough to protect dean and by god he will make himself an impassable 6′4 between this man and his brother. i think especially since finding out about flagstaff, DOUBLY since becoming a parent, sam is like...so less than impressed with john’s bullshit, and even more impatient than he already was of john’s stupid excuses.

there’s also this motif of cleaning throughout the fic - in john and sam’s very first scene alone together, they are washing dishes. at first this was a nod to sam and dean doing it in lebanon - dean washing, sam drying - but washing is the “hard” part of doing the dishes; when my mom taught me how to do them i began learning by drying first. so of course dean has been washing and letting sam dry all their lives - almost literally, because john talks pretty early on about dean being a neat freak too, because john simply wouldn’t pick up after himself but still hated the mess. there’s a few mentions of it in the fic, how john liked being able to leave a mess behind in their motel rooms, how he’d prop his feet on the table - but in season 10, it’s sam on his knees scrubbing the bloodstained floors after dean’s murder spree, and in broken road sam makes john wash the dishes, and at the end, sam makes him mop. @maulthots put it best:

like that’s it. that's literally it. and then, finally, john offers to clean up on his own without being asked. that’s Growth™, at least in whatever way he’s capable of it. at any rate, he’s too afraid of getting hit again to NOT clean up after himself lol

#2 - dean/cas car scene [content warning for nsfw and discussion of past sexual violence - scroll down to #1 if you’d like to skip it!]

Cas lets go of Dean, but it's to reposition his hands on Dean's knees, slide those huge palms up Dean's thighs. Dean feels the heat of them bleeding through his jeans. Then, holy shit, Cas rests his thumbs on Dean's belt buckle, and makes eye contact.

Dean wets his lips, a little uncertain. He has no idea what Cas is going to do. "Yeah, okay," he croaks.

Cas leans in and kisses him again while he undoes Dean's belt. Like—fuck, like he knew Dean wouldn't want to watch. Dean hears the zipper on his fly, and all at once it clocks that, yeah, okay, this is really happening. Heart thudding in his ears, Dean reflexively lifts his hips so Cas can pull his jeans off. But Cas only slides them down a little. Then he reaches into Dean's boxers and gets a hand around his dick.

Oh. A small, quiet noise drops out of Dean into Cas's mouth, and he turns out of the kiss, panting as Cas pulls him out of his clothes. He's not sure what he was expecting, but this is okay. Just a handjob—he can handle that. It's good, actually. A little dry, but Cas has a light touch, and Dean has decided that he likes Cas's hands. He knows the shape of them very well.

i really enjoyed writing this whole scene, but this was my favorite part. cas technically does get dean’s consent, which was important to cas and a little bit of a big deal for dean too, but dean didn’t ask what cas was going to do before giving that consent, because he almost...doesn’t care? like, dean’s previous experiences with men were all lousy at best, and violent and traumatizing at worst, and arguably none of them were 100% consensual. so part of him is figuring that whatever happens will be within that spectrum, and he’ll just deal with it being awful no matter what it is because he almost literally can’t picture it not being awful. he's not doing it because he likes fucking men or expects he’ll like fucking cas, he’s doing because he wants to be close to cas, he wants to be away from michael and his dad, and because if he and cas are together now that’s part of the package and he’s just done the full “for keeps” commitment bit, so he’s not gonna pussy out now, right? he trusts cas not to actually harm him, and be closer to “lousy” than “violent,” but he is, in his mind, basically giving cas consent to hurt him, because to him that’s what sex with men IS. and he’s understandably pretty nervous because he doesn’t know what’s going to happen - all he’s sure of is that he won’t like it.

but then he does like it! he likes it a lot! trusting cas turns out to be the correct choice! because if cas had turned him down in that moment, trying to baby him or second guess him, i think dean would have felt really hurt and angry and embarrassed, he would have felt like he was broken or untouchable. which is why cas took him at his word, but ALSO did pretty much the most tame thing you can do and still count it as having sex. so cas managed to thread the needle perfectly because he knows dean so well and he’s literally been inside his mind and witnessed that trauma and knew everything to avoid doing. so for dean it wound up being TRULY consensual instead of the sort of fake consent he’s used to handing out to johns. if that makes any sense. idk i just really enjoyed doing it. i think a valid reading is that dean has this physical fear of men that is just...not explored very much in fic. and it was nice to write something where cas was sort of able to undo or heal a little of that damage.

#1 - michael

No, no, no—we can't die—we can't die, we are eternal, we are our Father's most beloved, His favorite son—

No no no no no no no no no—I can't die—I can't die—

Light fills the room, reflecting in Dean's eyes making them look as though they glow. And for the very first time, John sees him. John sees him, John sees him, John sees him—

Where is my Father? Is He watching? Can He see me?

Father, help me, I beg You—please, I don't want to die—

I don't want to die—

i could honestly paste the entire michael scene here, there’s not a thing about it i don’t love, but this was probably my favorite part. and look, i waited NINE YEARS to see michael!dean, i deserved to go apeshit!!! i think the fun thing about michael is that he’s a great foil to both john and dean, the literal connecting tissue, especially when he’s hopping bodies like that. he’s dean’s aggressor but he’s also dean’s twisted reflection, nearly broken by his father’s absence. it was impossible for john to see dean as he really is until michael let him see it through dean’s own eyes.

and then “i” at the end - i knew going in that i wanted a “we” pronoun (though i almost chickened out of it), because michael’s in charge but he’s also making his vessel do things with him, like laugh or scream or hurt people. but when michael dies, he’s alone figuratively and literally, because john’s not dying with him, and his own father has forsaken him too - and that’s the way dean so often felt, and FEELING that was probably the only thing that could possibly give john the motivation to be even slightly less self-centered and shitty.

michael was my whole reason for writing this fic - because i was livid they didn’t use him to tie dean and john together in canon, because the burden of being his vessel is just one more thing dean had to take...this whole chapter, this whole fic, hinged entirety on the batshit insane dynamic between michael and dean and john. and like there are parts of this fic i was insecure about and wished i could have done better, but this? i think i nailed it. definitely the part i had the most fun writing.

but like, honorable mention?

"Dude," Dean says, flipping on his blinker so he can pull up beside the local grocery, "can we not do any touchy-feely shit, please? That's—"

"Gay?" Sam suggests.

"Get out of my car."

>:)

#liz answers asks #deanwinchestergender #broken road #br meta #supernatural #spn for ts #ASK MEMES #technically

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mainveyn · 3 years ago

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yo here's a challenge for ya 😏 write smth for tsukishima about that song u posted on ur story because he is quite similar to ur rinnie but we're tired of you keep talking about him already 🥱 time for our blonde cocky first year to shine 😍 -your bestie irl

a/n : honestly i have no idea which one of you is sending this lol but how dare you stomped into my domain expansion with these kind of bratty attitude 🤨 so no i'm adding my suna into this too 😉💗

genre : angst fluff

characters : suna, tsukishima (not specified so it works for both)

extra notes : this is pretty much self indulgent ig and i was kinda tired while writing this so i dont rlly like how it turns out 🙃 but ngl this song literally screams tsukki, i mean will u look at the name 👀

your eyes were glued on the screen since the movie started, but he knew your mind was somewhere else. it wasn't that hard to notice you're not your usual self. your sleep-deprived look and stiff posture, like you'd been on edge but for no reason. your favourite drink that he made for you is left untouched on the coffee table. and damn, that little space settled between the two of you on the couch.

all these signs suddenly remind him of the fight he'd with you last week. nothing too serious, it always revolved around the topic of 'you'd been so distant lately' and 'you're not making time for us'. and those words always came out as a whining banter with that cute little pout you excessively used against him.

so what is this faint yet unnerving feeling churning at the pit of his stomach? was it because the argument doesn’t get you as worked up as before anymore? or was it the way your complaint about his neglectful behaviour started to come out as tired already? do you not bother anymore?

he puffed out a sigh, hoping to relieve this sudden heavy weight crushing his heart. internally cursing because he can’t focus on the movie anymore, his brain can’t multitask when he tries to think of ways to make up for you.

a date at your favourite cafe? or that stupid matching keychain that you keep pestering him about few days ago? shit, what was the name of your favourite kpop group again that you were itching to get their upcoming album? should he get you the polaroid of your bias? is he even okay with the idea of you having someone else's photo at the back of your phone case when you already have him?

a deep soothing tune from the strumming of the guitar starts to play out softly and pull him back from his haywire thoughts. and he was glad it helped you loosened up too, watching you relaxing on the back of the couch now. so he took the opportunity to scoot closer and slings his arm around your shoulder, pulling you in briefly to place a kiss on your temple.

when you’re not in front of me

i know insecurities

get in your head

he wasn’t paying much attention to the first half of the song. but now he can’t help himself from getting hooked into it when the lyrics resonate across your shared apartment, wondering if god is watching him right now because he can taste the irony from each verse.

i’m not gonna interrupt

if you need to talk about it

roll my eyes or get offended by

the way you doubt it

you curiously peeked at the corner of your eyes, witnessing him nodding along the beats with unusual enthusiasm. your eyebrows lifted in a questioning fashion, because five years of dating him had you know his music taste better than your calculus module. and it's definitely nowhere close to these hopeless romantic genres that you hogged in your playlist.

you know you’re mine

you just forget sometimes

so promise me you won’t

your mind lets the words sink in, interpreting the chorus to know what really drew his attention but it only hit you hard in the face. the embarrassment slowly takes over, either the fact that he knows you're still not over with those resolved arguments or how he effortlessly gets his message across to reassure you through this very song.

and you know i’ll remind you

when you think i don’t

a smirk was evident on him as he caught you with blushes painted all over your feature. he shifted in his seat so he is facing you now as he wordlessly waited for you to speak up first. but your stubbornness won’t allow you, determined not to give away that your sour mood was long gone.

“hey stupid, i love you.” he playfully sing along in a teasing tone, but the fondness in his eyes says otherwise.

reblogs are very much appreciated <3

#suna x reader #suna x you #suna x y/n #haikyuu suna #tsukishima x reader #tsukishima x you #tsukishima x y/n #haikyuu tsukishima

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xenteaart · 4 years ago

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Black Tights and Other Things

Pairing: Five Hargreeves x Reader

Summary: It was initially insipred by a request about Five seeing Reader wearing a dress for the first time but I lost it, and also took the request in a completely different direction lol. I deeply apologize, I suck at writing requests honestly.

The actual summary: Five catches you dancing and has a little epiphany.

Warnings: this fic explores ideas of femininity and is very likely not gonna be a good read for gender non-conforming folks, so sorry about that.

GIF not mine! if u know the owner pls let me know so i can credit them

Note: it was mainly based on my own experience and i guess i just had to reflect on it smh and Five literally has more of a featured role in this ngl :’D

also yea it fits into my Commission AU so just a reminder, they’re both in their 20s.

P.s. ladies, dance in your underwear in front of a mirror, don’t deprive yourself of reconnecting with your inner,,, divine. lol i’m not in a cult i promise it just feels very good

The one thing you’d missed the most, apart from hot showers, fresh food and other obvious life-saving necessities, was music. During your stay in the absolute nightmare that your post-apocalyptic life was, you weren’t fortunate enough to stumble upon a record player or, in fact, anything that was even remotely fit to produce sounds resembling melodies. Sure, you did play tin cans and pieces of wood out of boredom, making very simplistic copies of actual instruments out of them, like drums or a xylophone, but it was barely enough to satisfy your craving for proper music.

So now, being a Commission recruit and having your own flat and access to the wonders of civilization, you couldn’t help but take advantage of all the things that you’d been longing for, one of them being music.

You and Five were having a very well-deserved day off and decided to reward yourselves with some nice filling dinner. Five volunteered to do the grocery shopping for the ingredients while you chose to stay indoors, and when he came back, holding bags full of goods in his arms, the image that he was met with stopped him dead in his tracks.

You were only wearing your underwear and a pair of black half-transparent tights, which sort of looked like you were getting dressed but got distracted halfway. The outfit itself, or lack thereof, wasn’t at all an unusual occurrence, considering how each other’s nudity and physiology hardly ever bothered either of you after years of doing whatever it took to keep the other alive.

It was your dancing that took Five by surprise. As he eyed your figure briefly, he took notice of how the line of your tights was sitting on your waist securely, framing your form in a flattering way and defining the curves that you got after gaining some weight you’d been desperately missing.

In your days in the apocalypse, you felt like your body was your prison. Or rather, you were a slave of your own body. It needed food, sleep and warmth to keep living, and your entire existence was narrated by the weak and needy vehicle that you had to take care of. There was truly nothing pretty about dull and brutal survival.

Right now, however, you felt yourself regaining control as you were no longer your body’s servant and instead it was yours. It was healthier, stronger, and it was complying to your every wish and command.

As your entire being, mind and flesh, surrendered to the raw ecstasy of your dance, you completely forgot there was anything at all in the world besides yourself and the music, the waves of which you were surfing so smoothly and naturally that the slight clumsiness and awkwardness of some of your movements were only adding to the charm.

There was no choreography behind the action; your every swing and turn being mindless and somewhat intuitive as you allowed yourself to dissolve into the tunes of the song you were dancing to.

As Five was looking at you silently, he was struggling to put his finger on what exactly was so special about what was happening but he knew there was clearly something.

You didn’t really think of yourselves as a boy and a girl, or a man and a woman. Back in the apocalypse, there was hardly anything left of the norms you’d learnt in your before life, which meant you were merely two human beings, completely stripped of their gender identity and expression, and it continued to be the way you perceived each other even after getting back to the normal (well, more or less, all things considered) world.

The concept of having some sort of intrinsic differences was getting more and more blurred as you saw each other as perfectly equal, which you totally were. Equal, however, did not mean the same, and that was exactly what you both tended to forget in your day-to-day life.

As Five was watching you move to the music carefree, he came to realize he was witnessing what he never knew was there in the first place.

It was fair to say that after spending so much time together Five basically knew you inside out. He knew you were caring and thoughtful. Outspoken, ill tempered and tough were a crucial part of the package as well, but right now he felt like he was getting a glimpse of this new unfamiliar layer, looking past everything he thought he knew about you before.

It was the unconditional femininity that was deeply embedded in the very fabric of your essence, burning with radiance like an exploding supernova, and the best thing about it was how blissfully unaware you were of its presence. Right in this moment, it seemed you didn’t have a care in the world and were simply dancing like no one was watching.

There was something so powerful about your inherent feminine nature mixed with how untamed yet tender and perfectly reliable you were, that Five didn’t even notice he’d been holding his breath.

He didn’t want to startle you and disrupt the flow you were so clearly lost in, literally immersed in some other dimension that he had no way of ever coming in contact with. It was yours and yours only, and it was beautiful.

Five was just standing there, leaning against the doorframe utterly mesmerized by how your body was seemingly guided and led by an invisible force. It took him a good couple of minutes to realize that this force was coming from within you, and the sheer unfiltered power radiating from your figure was, in fact, you all along. And he finally saw you for what you were. A woman.

“Oh, God,” he thought to himself, unable to deal with the sudden surge of feelings and thoughts that were overwhelming him all at once.

#five hargreeves x reader #number five x reader #five hargreeves x you #number five x you #tua fic #my fic #my writing #five hargreeves #number five #The Umbrella Academy

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maladjusted-nerd · 4 years ago

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Starsky and Hutch’s Girlfriends (and Their Hair Color)

[PBS announcer voice] This post is brought to you by the time I was reading The Ollie Report for Bounty Hunter and came across the memorable line: “Again, Starsky is drawn to the dark-haired girl, Hutch to the blonde. Exogamists they are not.”

These are the two ladies in question, respectively:

I thought of this quote a lot as I continued watching the show, because it was quite often relevant. But then I got to Starsky’s Lady, and suddenly Hutch’s date wasn’t a blonde! I began to wonder about the quote, and the truth of the sentiment behind it (which is by no means specific to that one blog). Did Hutch really tend to go for the blondes, and Starsky for the dark-haired women?

So like any sane person, I decided to spend a billion hours of my life making a long-ass photo-heavy meta post that hopefully someone will care about. If anyone actually finds this information interesting or useful I will be happy, buuut I guess if nothing else it gives us an excuse to look at a bunch of pretty ladies.

How did I decided who’s here: I started with the list of women from the Canon Compendium’s Girlfriends and Dates page, added anyone whom I felt the boys made a “concerted effort” to flirt with, and then threw out a few people I didn’t think belonged. I tried my hardest to be objective, but making this list was by no means an exact science and several times it really just boiled down to “do I personally believe she should be on here” so like people will have different opinions on that and it’s fine! Spice of life or whatever.

As for the actual contents of the list: I will state each woman’s name and the episode she’s in. (If she doesn’t have a name she’s listed as Jane Doe. This is a cop show, after all.) I will state her hair color-- for Reasons and also My Sanity the only options are “blonde” or “darkhaired” (not blonde), but hair color is fucking weird and sometimes it was a guess so feel free to think otherwise. I will also state the reason that she’s here, aka the nature of her relationship with Hutch or Starsky (or both)-- so spoiler warning for pretty much everything, I guess.

Also fair warning that sometimes I was too lazy to get a good picture, or it was just actually impossible (newsflash: discos have bad lighting). Rip to any women I may have made look bad, you’re all beautiful queens and I love you.

Pre-Show

Vanessa (Hutchinson Murder One)- Darkhaired. Hutch’s late ex-wife and all-around terrible person.

Laura Kanen (Deckwatch)- Blonde. Hutch’s ex-girlfriend.

Helen Davidson (Lady Blue)- Blonde. Starsky’s late ex-girlfriend.

Kathy Marshall (Fatal Charm)- Darkhaired. A stewardess friend of theirs; it’s never said she’s an ex BUT she kisses Hutch square on the mouth in greeting and is Starsky’s date for dinner/disco. And she dances with both of them. Good enough for me!

Season 1

Hutch

Jeannie Walton (The Fix)- Blonde. His girlfriend at the start of the episode but not by the end! (Rip king)

Molly (Pariah)- Darkhaired. Stewardess friend/one-night stand? Something like that. Also his date at the end.

Jane Doe (Deadly Imposter)- Blonde. His date at the party.

Abigail Crabtree (Deadly Imposter to Vendetta)- Blonde. The only girlfriend we see in several episodes!! (The only girlfriend that lasts several episodes, whoops.)

Starsky

Jane Doe (Pariah)- Blonde. His date at the end.

Jane Doe (Deadly Imposter)- Darkhaired. His date at the party.

Amy (The Hostages)- Darkhaired. She works at a café that he’s going to for a second time, to let her know he’s ~available.

Sharman Crane (Running)- Darkhaired. They had a semester of woodshop together in junior high and then they kind of fall in love while he’s helping her dry out.

Season 2

Hutch

Abby (Deadly Imposter to Vendetta)- Still blonde. Miraculously still his girlfriend. (Until she isn’t.)

Gillian Ingram (Gillian)- Blonde. His now-late girlfriend who fucking deserved better.

Jane Doe (Gillian)- Blonde. Lady at the bowling alley that Starsky discreetly tries to set him up with.

Christine (Starsky’s Lady)- Darkhaired. His date of the episode.

Starsky

Vicky (The Las Vegas Strangler)- Darkhaired. They don’t really get a chance to go on an official date but they kiss a bunch and he’s really sweet on her and it’s cute.

Andrea (Vendetta)- Darkhaired. His picnic date.

Nancy Rogers (Gillian)- Darkhaired. His bowling date.

Terry Roberts (Starsky’s Lady)- Darkhaired. His now-late girlfriend who, like Gillian, also fucking deserved better.

Laura Stevens (The Velvet Jungle)- Blonde. They’re on a date at the end, but it should also be noted they meet when she accidentally knocks him into a dumpster. You know, like the start of any good romance.

Sharon Freemont (Starsky and Hutch Are Guilty)- Blonde. His evil lawyer girlfriend. (Not that he knows she’s evil.)

Both

Jane and Bobette (The Vampire)- Jane is the blonde on the right, Bobette is the darker blonde on the left. Starsky and Hutch mix up their names so it’s hard to tell which girl they actually like better, and also they’re twins so like does it even really matter?

Officer Sally Hagen (The Specialist)- Darkhaired. Starsky kisses up her arm in her first scene (someone please file a workplace harassment suit against him), and then at the end he and Hutch keep wrapping their arms around her waist. But she does get to flip both of them over her shoulder, so it kinda evens out.

Season 3

Hutch

Dianna Harmon (Fatal Charm)- Darkhaired. His possessive, violent nurse girlfriend. (You can really pick ‘em, Hutchinson.)

Dr. Judith Kaufman (The Plague)- Darkhaired. He tries so hard, but twas not meant to be.

Molly Bristol (The Collector)- Darkhaired. His girlfriend du jour.

Anna Akhanatova (A Body Worth Guarding)- Blonde. He’s technically her bodyguard and then they spend like two whole days making out. Good for them.

Mary (Class in Crime)- Blonde. His fishing date.

Starsky

Jane Doe (Murder on Playboy Island)- Darkhaired. Undercover agent he flirts with at the bar.

Rosey Malone (I Love You Rosey Malone)- Blonde. The entire plot revolves around him falling in love with her and it really doesn’t end well.

Jane Doe (The Collector)- Darkhaired. His date at their late-night deli party. (Bonus Starsky in the picture, hi Starsky!)

Sharon Carstairs (The Heavyweight)- Blonde. Their canoodling on his couch gets interrupted by Important Case Matters, and she winds up getting re-engaged to her ex-fiancé (ex-ex-fiancé?). Rip to a king.

Rachel (Class in Crime)- Darkhaired. His fishing date.

Caitlin (Class in Crime)- Her hair almost has a red tint but it’s otherwise undefinable. Car saleslady/one-night stand.

K.C. McBride (Quadromania)- Blonde. They have a nice taxi date (although he’s been sleep deprived all episode, poor boy, and falls asleep).

Both

Christine Phelps (The Heroes)- Blonde. She makes them lose all their braincells, it’s painful to witness. This episode hopes you will forget the actress was Gillian last season.

Julie McDermott (The Action)- Blonde. Starsky wins the kerfuffle for her but Hutch definitely makes a good go of it.

Lisa Kendricks (Foxy Lady)- Blonde. They drool and fight over her for half an episode like they did with Christine and it’s embarrassing.

Season 4

Hutch

Paula (Photo Finish)- Darkhaired. He’s like her date at the party, and also the end.

Kate Larrabee (Cover Girl)- Darkhaired. An old friend of his. It starts out just as a comfort thing but they quickly become very friendly.

Marlene (Starsky’s Brother)- Darkhaired. Starsky steals her from Nicky as a Big Brother Power Move but Hutch winds up with her at the bar.

Marianne Owens (Ballad for a Blue Lady)- Darkhaired. I don’t really know what’s going on here but there’s Something (and there’s a lot of parallels with Rosey Malone, so).

Starsky

Sergeant Lizzie Thorpe (Discomania)- Blonde. Technically Hutch talks with her more, but Starsky does most of the flirting.

Jane Doe (Discomania)- Darkhaired. He spends literally five minutes dancing with her. Is it relevant to the case? No. Does he care? Also no.

Emily Harrison (Blindfold)- Darkhaired. He accidentally blinds her during a case so he starts hanging out with her out of guilt but I feel like he also kinda falls in love; they kiss at one point anyway.

Marcie Fletcher (Photo Finish)- Blonde. His photographer girlfriend.

Officer Dee O’Reilly (Strange Justice)- Blonde. His meter maid girlfriend. They have a date at the end!

Jane Doe (Dandruff)- Darkhaired. He’s making out with her at the beginning.

Detective Joan Meredith (Black and Blue)- Darkhaired. It’s Heavily implied they slept together. (Side note love u Meredith!)

Melinda Rogers (The Groupie)- Blonde. He has a date with her at the end. (Yeah she slept with Hutch, but he was undercover and proceeds to lowkey rebuff her in the tag, so I’m not counting it.)

Katie (Starsky’s Brother)- Blonde. His date at the nightclub.

Both

Allison May/Laura Anderson (Targets Without a Badge parts 2 & 3)- Darkhaired. They both try to court her before Starsky realizes she’s his childhood friend (although they do make another go of it in the tag).

Kira (Starsky vs Hutch)- Blonde. Starsky’s girlfriend, although she says she’s also in love with Hutch so then they sleep together which Starsky is NOT thrilled about and it’s a very ugly mess.

Totals:

Hutch:

Pre-show: 3 (1 blonde, 2 dark) Season 1: 4 (3 blonde, 1 dark) Season 2: 6 (4 blonde, 2 dark) Season 3: 8 (5 blonde, 3 dark) Season 4: 6 (1 blonde, 5 dark) Overall: 26 (13 blonde, 13 dark)

(If the math looks weird, it’s cause Abigail counts for both seasons she’s in but only once overall.)

Starsky:

Pre-show: 2 (1 blonde, 1 dark) Season 1: 4 (1 blonde, 3 dark) Season 2: 8 (3 blonde, 5 dark) Season 3: 10 (6 blonde, 3 dark, 1 ??) Season 4: 11 (6 blonde, 5 dark) Overall: 35 (17 blonde, 17 dark, 1 ??)

(Thirty-five?? Calm the fuck down, Starsky.)

In conclusion:

“Exogamists, they are not” might have been true back at the end of season 1 when it was said, but it’s certainly not true by season 4/the end of the series. Hutch now seems to favor dark-haired women, and Starsky’s about half and half, although they both wind up with an equal split overall.

Do with that information what you will; I’m outta here.

#starsky and hutch #long post #adventures in meta #everyone say thank you canon compendium!#alternate titles: 'Fuck Me' and 'The Meta Post That Kicked My Ass'#dear god that was a lot #why can't i do productive things with my time....#anyway i'm taking a week's vacation now #major respect to people who do huge meta things cause this was exhausting #bless you all

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linkfms · 4 years ago

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☠️ * what is up, party people ! i’m jojo ( she/her ), 23, and in the pst timezone. it’s been a while since i’ve been in a group so... pls bear with me. anyway, under the cut you’ll find more info on resident emo boy: link ! i’m so excited to write with u all, and, if u ever want to plot give this a lil’ like or send an im over @ yea right#4256 !

lincoln “link” seong was spotted in the fashion district adorning prada combat boots, with some airpod pros on. they’re most likely listening to when you were young by the killers. you may know them as @hyperlink or as that jeon jungkook lookalike. their twenty - fourth birthday just passed. while living in tribeca, they’ve gained a bit of a reputation. they’re known to be erratic but on the other hand vehement. wonder if they’ll be the next person to hit the headlines. ( cis male & he/him )

↳ THE BASICS: STATISTICS.

full name: seong hyunjae ( 성 현재 ) / lincoln seong.

nickname: link, and will probably only answer to link !

age & date of birth: 24 & november 21, 1996.

hometown: born in busan, south korea, but moved to jefferson, connecticut in 2006.

current location: tribeca, new york.

education: completed high school and attempted first semester of university, but decided to pursue music instead.

occupation: drummer for indie/alternative rock band, my time ( sound is similar to bands like the killers, the 1975, and paramore ). also is an affiliate with an esports organization ! doesn’t play competitively, but streams and creates content for them weekly.

sexual orientation: pansexual & panromantic.

gender & pronouns: cisgender male & he/him pronouns.

↳ THE BACKGROUND: BIOGRAPHY. ( tw: mentions of alcoholism & abuse )

seong hyunjae ( later given the english name lincoln seong... thanks linkin park ! ) was born in the heart of busan, south korea. his parents married at the age of 21, due to the cultural expectations of having a child born out of wedlock. while things seemed to be smooth sailing for a while, the couple realized the real struggles of adulthood. financial issues came into play. stress from working multiple jobs every single day took a toll on their mental health, as well as their relationship with each other. link’s mother began to develop an alcohol addiction, and her abusive behavior came following after. their home was falling apart, with four-year-old link falling asleep to muffled screaming and glass being thrown on the next room over. his father was able to withstand it for a while, but he drew the line after coming home from work to see large cuts on the side of his son’s thigh, and a bruise forming across his cheek. that was when he knew his wife was dangerous. so, one night when lincoln’s mother as at work, he packed his belongings, grabbed link, and left without looking back.

for a while, it was just the two of them. they found ways to make it work, and despite the fact that it was a constant struggle, his father never wanted link to lose his childhood. in fact, his father gave him everything he could give — but most importantly, as cheesy as it sounds, his unconditional love and support. as someone who lost his own parents young, he made sure that link would never feel like he’s being deprived of that, ever. they created this tight-knight bond because of that, which can’t ever be broken. and now, link’s fondest memories always involved spending time with his father. one favorite memory of his involved morning jam sessions after breakfast. link’s father was previously a lead guitarist in a garage band with a few of his high school friends, so while he was playing riffs on his electric guitar, eight-year-old link would be banging the coffee table with plastic straws.

when link was about ten, he and his father sold all of their belongings and moved all the way to jefferson, connecticut for a job offer that he couldn’t refuse. fast forward a few years, and he’s a teenager in high school. growing up link was more of an introvert, and would spend his time in the computer lab playing video games or browsing in online forums. he was a regular in this my chemical romance forum ( under the username @hyperlink ), and made a lot of his lifelong friends over there. one of his online friends jokingly suggested one afternoon that they should start a band over their nightly skype call, and while it was initially shrugged off as dream more than an arm’s reach away, my time was born. link had to endlessly plead his father to buy him a secondhand drum kit off of craigslist for christmas. but once he found it under their tree that year, it sparked this drive in him to learn and practice nonstop.

their first official band practice happened a day after link’s high school graduation ( which was also the first time everyone saw each other in person ! ), and they spent that entire summer making music. at first, link only thought of it as a hobby... since, he was attending his first year of university that fall. but after playing their first few shows and making all these memories, he couldn’t keep the band in the backburner. he dropped out not too long after to pursue his music career full-time. moved out, spent the next few months working long shifts at the local amusement park, and shared one two-bedroom apartment with his bandmates. one of their songs went viral one crazy night, and the next thing they knew, they were being signed into a record label. now ? they’re one of the biggest alternative/indie rock bands out there with multiple platinum records, sold out world tours, and millions of streams each year. their time finally came.

↳ THE INSIDE LOOK: PERSONALITY.

link definitely... gets babied a lot ( by his bandmates and his fans ), and he uses that to his advantage :] because of that he gets away with a lot of things, but it’s usually with things that are small like eating the last slice of pizza and it would be justified with “ no he is a growing BOY he NEEDS it ! ”

that being said, he eats nonstop. the guy carries a sandwich bag full of cheerios wherever he goes. his friends know that if they can’t finish eating something, they can always donate it to link for a good cause.

when my chemical romance announced their reunion tour in 2019, he threw his phone across the room and cried. my chemical romance ( with green day and linkin park as a close second ! ) are his all-time favorite bands, and a lot of my time’s sound is heavily inspired by them.

when i tell u that this man is so chill, i mean it. like things could LITERALLY be on fire and he’d be like “ just throw some water on it it’ll be fine 😎 ” ... he’s not the type to worry about things, and is more of a go with the flow type of person. he doesn’t even need to be zooted to be like this. KJFGDG

being in the band and a part of the entertainment industry caused a small shift in his personality. maybe he just blossomed ? who knows ! but because he’s been exposed to the rockstar life, he was able to open up more. he’s always seeking thrills, big or small, and won’t have the time to think about the consequences for his actions.

because the my chemical romance forum that was once his second home shut down, he’s since moved on to reddit. social media isn’t really his thing ( and his fans always get mad at him for posting a selfie once a month then dipping ), but catch him on subreddits making comments or starting fights for the sheer entertainment of proving someone wrong.

this might sound bad but... he still can’t wrap his head around the fact that he isn’t ? financially struggling anymore ? even if he’s already bought a house and two luxury cars for his dad, he still gets ticked off if he sees something small like an APPLE that is marked a dollar and a few cents over the usual. he catches himself using things until they’re ABSOLUTELY worn out, and still leeches off of his bandmates/friends when he can. <3 also, if something is broken, he’ll be the type to figure it out and fix it himself.

people... don’t exactly remember the last time he’s slept. it could be the insomnia ( it’s definitely insomnia, thx childhood trauma ! ) but it’s almost gotten to the point where he’s afraid to fall asleep on his own. he’ll always try to find ways to sleep in someone’s company, even if it’s just him crashing on a couch while someone is watching tv right there. if he’s alone though, he’ll always try to find ways to distract himself like stream for 10 hours straight.

speaking of trauma... he’s also scared of relationships. after witnessing the way his mother treated his father, he’s cautious of history repeating itself... but with him. so whenever he catches himself even falling for just a little, he dips.

his life revolves around the 4 m’s: marvel movies, minecraft, music, and my chemical romance. that’s it.

a link 😏 to his pinterest ! also, i don’t have any wcs, but if we plot, i promise i’ll use my big brain to brainstorm something with u. <3

#wealthyhq:intro #the way i spent too much time writing this.................

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queer-star · 5 years ago

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💡 give me some facts about any of them!

U already asked me the same question on my main so this time instead of doing main chars I'm gonna do med cats edition starting with my Main Bitch™

💡Random fact about them:

Foxspirit: Used to be a very anxious tiny baby with love for healing, has evolved into a sleep deprived lovable grump who actually cares for everyone and is def the only cat with a brain in this god forsaken valley. He's very devoted and although still somewhat anxious he pushes through it to do what is right. He actually ended up fulfilling a prophecy instead of the propheced cat because he just couldn't sit on his ass and let fate take course, instead deciding to do this shit himself.

Echosong: She's Foxspirit's mentor and just a big fluffy lovable grandma. Also she's a munchkin so she's just...really fucking tiny.

Oddpaw/belly: He's Foxspirit's apprentice and left his home Clan because of his abusive mum and the fact that Foxspirit was super kind to him and protected the lil kit. He actually didn't have a name for months and was apprenticed very late! He was a very sickly kitten so his bitch of a mum refused to name him or even take care of him, Storm Clan was lacking a med cat so Foxpaw and Echosong came there occasionally to help and Foxpaw helped to deliver the kittens and had to witness Ambergaze being a horrible mum. After she tried to give him some rude ass name Foxpaw chased her off and named the kitten himself, Oddkit after his odd eyes. After this Oddkit decided he wanted to be Foxpaw's future apprentice! He also got the suffix belly bc he's just...really round and soft. Another funfact, he is Thornstar's grandson so he is also related to Foxspirit.

Snowwhisker: Big fluff man, but slowly getting old. Treats Foxspirit somewhat like his grandson since he used to train his mum back in the day.

Mossclaw: She's a sphinx and used to be a rogue. How did a sphinx survive in cold mountains? I don't fucking know tbh. Anyways she's one of the main bads and would totally murder Foxspirit if given the chance.

Cheetahfur: Def the smartest med cat in the valley, she's also the mum friend of the group and the voice of reason. She's like Foxspirit's second mum tbh....or rather third mum. Fourth mum? He's got a lot of parents.

Rabbithop: Foxspirit's friend and Cheetahfur's apprentice, they're just a big lovable ball of baby. Born anxious sweetheart and will die anxious sweetheart, Foxspirit would literally die for them.

Curlywhisker: Ran away shortly after Foxpaw was apprenticed to raise her kittens away from her abusive ex. She's a single badass mama who would supple a bear for her babies.

Tigerpounce: A big, scary, muscular dude. Literally the least cat you'd expect to be a medicine cat, but despite his terryfing apperence he's a very gentle healer. Also a cat of very few words.

Eaglepaw and Hawkpaw: I'm putting them together because their funfact is the same. They're conjoined twins! They're connected by the hip so walking is a bit tricky but they manage. They look like mirror reflections of each other, their parents and mentor Tigerpounce are probably the only cats in their clan that can tell them apart they're so identical.

#asks #my ocs

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im-gonna-liveforever · 5 years ago

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ITS HECKIN TWISTED APPRECIATION WEEK SO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS (part 1/2)

“YEAH THAT’S RIGHT I’M GONNA YELL ABOUT THE SOUNDTRACK LIKE I DID LAST WEEK BC TWISTED IS A GOOD HECKING MUSICAL WITH A GOOD HECKING SOUNDTRACK

(Now with favorite lines! bc why not, right?) (favorite lines either there bc I like the lyrics in that part or I really like how it sounds within the song)

I’m not a professional music person (I’ve been in band for several years and I’m pretty good, but I don’t know anything about music theory or anything abt singing) but AH WELL, I LIKE RANTING ABT MY SPECIAL INTERESTS AND THE INTERNET IS A GOOD PLACE TO FEEL LIKE I’M TALKING TO SOMEONE, SO HERE WE GO

(also there’s definitely going to be Twisted spoilers under the cut (for act one, at least), so watch out if you haven't seen it)

(also also I split this into two parts bc it’s getting late and as you can see by how this progresses, I got sleep deprived quickly plus it got way too long. This is part one with all the first act songs, part two will have the second act songs and should be up by tomorrow.)

OK THE OPENING NUMBER RIGHT?? THE INSTRUMENTALS?? THE HARMONIES??? THE GENERAL SAJKFDASJKFHDSJK???!?!? Like, it literally sounds like a Disney song but they cuss! It’s amazing!! (And all the citizens?? Comedy gold, every one of them, I swear) (AND THE FUCKINGJDSJKJDSKL SOPRANO PART???!? I’M C R Y I N G I FORGOT WHAT HER NAME WAS BUT SHES SUCH A GOOD SINGER THANK YOU FOR YOUR VOICE)

Favorite lines:

“May the Rats ejaculate upon you!” “Thank you, thank you very much!”

“Why is everyone in the kingdom white?” “Uhh... Jafar?”

“But ugliness permits a man to use his wits, ‘cause pretty people never have to try”

“UGLY OLD JAFAR!!”

pretty much the whole song past the line “Why am I the only one who sees things as they are?”

Specifically “I want to be a cat!” “Wha-” “FUCK YOU!”

But more specially “Whistle while you swallow a spoonful of sugar and your dreams will come true upon a star!!!!” bc OH MY GOD IT’S BEAUTIFUL

Everyone listing how they want Jafar to die

ALSO SPECIALLY THE LAST 30 SECONDS BC AHJSAHJKADS (everything at and past the lines “and if we dream a little harder/ our patience and our honor...” etc.)

OK I STEAL EVERYTHING TIME! ULTIMATE CHAOS SONG, AND I LOVE. BE THE EVIL GREMLIN YOU WANT TO SEE IN THE WORLD. Also: the jazziness?? the opening instrumentals??? it’s so good. To the people playing the instrumentals for this musical: ,,,thank you,,,.,. (Also I learned recently that most of Jeff’s songs are in my range so guess who’s gonna try and learn this song?)

Favorite lines:

“Fetch, ya fucks!”

Did I mention the instrumentals?? bc hfhhhjdklsajk They seem simple but they’re also going ham and I love it

“Monkey thought we should just kill you, but I said ‘No, monkey, that’s crazy’ but now I’m thinking, yeah, no more fucking raisins...’“

“Thanks but no, thanks, ‘The Man’“

Honestly every line in this is golden, but I can’t put them all in and that sucks

“You’re only in trouble if you get caught!” “Aladdin?” “I’m in trouble!”

“Just one question, why, man?” “’Cause you stole my daughter’s hymen!” “That’s completely fair, but, in my defense, dude, your daughter’s hot!”

EVERYTHING AND MOOREE!!! SHE WANTS IT ALL AND I’M CRYING BC SHE SOUNDS BEAUTIFUL WHILE DOING SO. (I just realized that there’s 14 songs on this soundtrack and I’m sorry in advance for how long this post A) already is and B) is going to get) This song is so dramatic and that somehow fits the mood of her character and I love it so much and just ahdshjkds. Also it’s just?? So pretty????

Favorite lines:

“But it’s just like, whatever”

“I just want to be free so badly! You slaves could never understand. :(”

“You’re probably thinking, she’s got everything. Well, it’s true, ‘cause I do, but so the fuck what?”

“I WANT THE MOON! I WANT TO LIVE ON THE MOON! And eat it in a pie! And keep it as a pet! and wear it like a gemstone in my hair!”

“As I laugh in their faces of moonbeam pie!!”

“It’s enough to make me with I were lowly and poor... But like... with money!”

THA GOLDEN FUCJKLCIODIGN RULE. LIKE HOLY SHIT I LOVE THIS SONG SO MUCH. AND THE DANCING THEY DO WITH IT IN THE SHOW ITSELF??? IT’S THE BEST. THE FIUCUING BEST. I’M CRYING. THE DANCING IS SO GOOD. AND SO IS THIS SONG. Also, it’s the #1 Starkid song I’d be comfortable showing to my mom, which is a definite plus! (I could also show this to my church pastor and he’d?? definitely like it, so that’s also a definite plus) And everyone’s so nice to Jafar, espically compared to the opening number and it just makes me so sad and let me give Jafar a hug, goddammit. ALSO also please let me meet the saxophone player and shake his hand, I don’t play saxophone but what he’s doing here is amazing. WAIT ALSO ALSO ALSO MAY I MEET THAT FLUTE PLAYER BC I’M JUST NOW HEARING THE FLUTE (AND HOW DID I NOT NOTICE IT BEFORE, I PLAY THAT INSTRUMENT???) AND I’M FUCJKIGDFONG HOLY SHIT JSUT FUCKINGJDSJKL ;BOUNCE AROUND ON THOSE NOTES WHY DON’T YOU I’M SAJDSKCDSJS

Favorite lines:

“Why it’s as easy as a 1,2,3,4!”

“Always treat others like sisters and brothers!”

all of the lines just sound so good, I can’t choose

The way Dylan Saunders says “Man” that that first time, like holy shit

The whole conversation between Omar and the thief

[completely monotone] “My hunger blinded me and forced me to act like an animal.”

AND THEN OMAR AND THE THIEF SING THE PART AND IT SOUNDS SO GOOD

The “boop boop bop doop zeep do-wow!” in the background during that part

“Good luck Jafar! And! Re! Mem! Ber!”

And then the whole ensemble sings it and it sounds so good

oh good god we’re not even 5 songs in yet i’m so sorry

GOLDEN RULE: EVIL REPRISE, OR, AS I CALL IT, “GOLDEN RULE WENT EMO BUT I STILL LOVE AND SUPPORT THEM”. Those dissonant sounds at the beginning? beautiful. All the random evil laughter? amazing. Whatever the heck the saxophonist is doing at the end? breathtaking, give me more. Joe Walker’s voice?? just fucking dhdsfjkfdlashjdsfklhfdsjkl

Favorite lines:

“Lets him rule the land WITH an iron fist!”

“The prize for winning? MORE GOLD, HAHA! And the game begins again!”

[sarcastically] “’Follow the golden rule’? Boy don’t be such a fool!”

“Follow the gold! Follow the gold! Follow the gold!” “AND RUUULE!!”

DID I MENTION THAT FUCKING SAXOPHONE PLAYER BC DUDE FUCKING AHSDJKDFS

the final “And Rule!”

Don’t be fooled bc this one is so short, it’s nearing midnight for me and also this song is really short. In reality, I fucking love this song and it’s one of my absolute favorite starkid villain songs and also one of my absolute favorites from this musical.

A THOUSAND AND ONE NIGHTS IS SOME FUCKINGNDSKLJ; GOOD SHIT I’M. Also, I don’t listen to it enough, so I’m giving y’all a running commentary as I listen to it for the first time outside of watching the whole musical 1) I love accidentals and key changes, and i’m,,, crying just the first verse is so good already, why haven’t I listened to this song enough 2) I’M CRYING I WANT TO KNOW THEIR STORY TOO THIS IS WHAT LOVE IS I’M CRYINGHJFDSJKSD 3) they keep using the word “’twist” and i’m ahsdhjkds bro 4) DYLAN YOUR VOICE. YOUR VOICE, IT’S TOO GOOD. IT MUST BE STOPPED, YOU’RE TOO GOOD, DYLAN 5) “LINGER OVER EVERY PART” OH MAN IT SOUDNS SO GOOD. SO GOOD. AHHHHHHDSHJDSFKLHJK 6) OK I’M LIKE ACTUALLY CRYINGN NOW THEY’RE IN LOVE. THIS IS WHAT LOVE IS. OH GOD OH FUCK 7) AND THEY SOUND SO GOOD, TOO, WHY HAVEN’T I LISTENED TO THIS SONG ENOUGH AHDHJKLDAS

OK I haven’t listened to this song enough to have favorite lines just yet, also I want to at least get to the end of the first act before I go to bed and it’s already midnight rn, so we’re going ahead and moving on (so sorry!)

IF I BE-FUCKIN-LIEVED. OH GOD. THIS ONE. THIS ONE IS SO GOOD. I LOVE IT SO MUCH. THE FLUTE, THE WORDS, THE SINGING LIKE GODDAMN. This one is also kinda within my range so I’m also trying to learn to sing it bc it’s just that good (cons of being a contralto: you get no female songs in musicals, pros of being a contralto: you get all the cool higher tenor songs) The raw emotion in his voice??? I’m crying??? The strength and soul and beauty and just ashjdskl;jdsfkl; it’s so, so beautifully and wonderfully amazing

Favorite lines:

“Science says you’re dead and gone forever! Reason says I’m talking to the air! But something in my heart, some secret, hidden part, illogically insists that you are there! Somewhere!!”

“Perhaps it’s not too late, to change the course of fate?”

“‘Cause after all, I must be pretty great... if you believed in me...”

Again this song is really short and there’s not a lot of lines to choose from and also I love them all and dfhjskdskjl this is just such a good song

I’m still crying

ORPHANED AT 33!!! [insert Peggle 2 gif] CHAOS... T W O!!!! HE’S MR ORPHAN, AKA CHAOS MAN (NOW WITH A MUSICAL NUMBER!) (I’m also trying to learn this one bc let me splurge in trying to teach myself Twisted songs, ok?) He’s being tragic and over-dramatic and it’s a beautiful song! and I also love how in the studio version, he doesn’t mention that they died earlier that year, so it almost comes as a shock when he says “when I was orphaned at... thirty-three” and it just makes the song that much funnier, trust me

Favorite lines:

I know I said this abt most of the other songs up to this point, but can I say all the lines? because all the lines

“[My parents are] dead... that makes me an orphan :’(”

“‘Cause my story’s just too saaad!”

“They call me a jerk off! a burn-out! A punk! But I can’t let that stuff in my head!”

“All things considered, I think I turned out pretty good! I pulled myself up by my bootstraps and started s t e a l i n g a l l I c o u l d!”

”I’ll make it through somehow, despite being so sadly and crushingly all alone...”

“I’ll BREAK THE CHAIN!! YOU’LL SEE!!! I’M GONNA L I V E F O R E V E R!!!!1!111!”

The last “thirty-three” bc Jeff oh my god what is that voice

HAPPY ENDING TIME, HECK YEAH!!!!! THIS SONG,,,, SO, SO GOOD, I’M A FUCKING SUCKER FOR SONGS WITH MORE THAN ONE PART THAT ALL END TOGETHER IN A HARMONY. THAT IS PEAK MUSICIANSHIP AND JUSTHSDHJFKSAD Also someone pointed this out to me, but the way to goes from Aladdin’s weirdly horny lines straight to the princess going “oh Aladdin, you poor, innocent soul :(” is just the funniest thing to me. And how it calls back to thier own solos, I’m???!? OH AND INSTRUMENTALS AGAIN. THE BAND FUCKING KILLED IT WITH THIS MUSICAL, IT’S SO, SO GOOD JUST AHDSJKLAKKFAnd the energy in it?? The excitement for the next act??? I’m pumped!! Are you pumped?? WELL GET READY BC YOU WILL BE

Favorite lines:

Yet a-fucking-gain I love every goshdarn line in this song, it’s just too good

“They’ll throw a parade in my honor, with peacocks and monkeys galore!”

“The people will cheer!” [cool guitar bit]

[Jafar’s relatively calm part ends] [electric guitar starts back up and Aladdin jumps on stage] “I CaN’T wAiT tO bE A RicH DUdE!!!11!1!″

“Stealing is so much easier when you’ve already got tons of gold!”

“I’ve got my eye! On what money can’t buy! ‘cause that princess is OH! Hella tight! I’ll be the one who plunders her cave of wonders! I’ll get my happy ending tonight!”

“My innocent Aladdin!”

Yes i’m fully aware I put pretty much Aladdin’s full part in there, stop judging me, it’s a good part

“It puts a damper on our love if you don’t have a head”

“So with with your permission, I’d like to bring back your bride!”

just. Jafar’s whole fantasy where he’s happy with his wife. I’m crying again, please just let him be happy

THE ENDING PART WHERE THEY ALL START UP AND BRING UP THIER OWN HOPES FOR THAT NIGHT AND THEY SING THE FINAL”TONIGHT!!!” ALL TOGETHER AND THEN THERE’S THAT COOL LITTLE 2 SECOND INSTRUMENTAL BIT AT THE VERY END IT’S JUST,.,, SO GOOD I’M DSJHDASHJKSDJK

Ok yeah that’s the end of the first act of songs! I should have the next part up by tomorrow, so get ready for more capslock and keysmashes and me generally being excited abt music bc MUSIC HECK YEAH DFFHADSJKHDAS

#twisted #twisted musical #starkid twisted #twisted starkid #starkid rewind #music #i love each and every song on this playlist and if you asked me to choose a favorite I'd black out for at least 2 days trying to decide #honestly tho these songs are so good #twisted soundtrack #musicals #musicals soundtrack

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sofhyuck · 6 years ago

Text

Terrace House!AU Mark

Genre: fluff, bullet point scenario

Word Count: 1.69k exactly ayyy

A/N please read the introduction before reading!

so same deal with Yuta’s scenario

you found out on the way to the house that ‘holy shit a member of nct 127 is going to be in the house with me wHaT dO I DO

you get to the house and settle in, meeting the other cast members

and it’s getting,,,really late,,,and everyone else is in the house except for nct boi

you and the other members are getting pretty concerned,,,but also really tired so one by one they all go to bed

except for you because you’re not tired yet plus,,,you’re so nervous to see who the member is you’re not sure you’d be able to go to sleep anyways

but it’s running on 2 in the morning and while you don’t have any work tomorrow,,,you know you should go to bed

and just as you’re shuffling past the front door the doorbell rings

you almost tripped and concussed yourself with how fast you ran to open the door

you opened the door to face a very exhausted looking mark lee

and you’re both so high key sleep deprived you can’t even really say anything

he gave you a soft smile and a little ‘hi’ and boi looked so soft and sle e py

so instead of trying to start a conversation you show him to his room and then,,,go to bed

well at least try to bc your heart is racing bc omfg your bias is literally two doors away from you

the next morning you wake up early bc someone is being hella loud in the kitchen

so you rub your eyes and make yourself a little more presentable before shuffling into the kitchen

and there is mark lee and oh no he found the eggs fuck

he looks up and recognizes you fro the night before and he smiles, which you return,,,but then you smell burning and you’re like “sHiT mARk the EggS”

and he doESn’T kNOw wHaT tO DO

so you rush over and grab the pan from him while he just kind of looks at you,,,in awe,,,bc

a) you know his name so are you a fan??? find out next week

and b) you look really cute in your pajamas while trying to salvage the burning frying pan

once you dispose of the disaster egg you turn to him with an exasperated sigh and low key scold him

“you know you can’t make eggs w h y would you d o that???”

but then you realize you just e x pose d yourself as a fan so you shut up real quick

but he just laughs and is like ‘glad to see we have a fan in the house’ while you blush so m u ch

feeling a little bad for scolding him you decide to help teach him how to cook eggs lol and together you make a pretty simple breakfast for the other members

soon enough everyone is awake and sitting at the table praising you guys for your hard work while you and mark just look at each other and silently agree to not talk about the earlier egg catastrophe

the other cast members already knew each other from the day before so now all eyes are on mark

you feel bad for the dude bc he looks a lil uncomfy but he slowly warms up to everyone

every time someone asks about the difficulties of being an idol he just brushes it off like ‘eh I get to do what I love while making people happy so it’s all worth it’

eventually conversation lulls and people begin to clean up and now’s your chance to ask the question you’ve been dying to know the answer to

“ok,,,so like,,,despite being a trainee and an idol forever,,,did you ever have time to watch vines?”

and boy just lights up like ‘hELl YEA’ and you’re so relieved like thank god sm didn’t keep him from witnessing a cultural phenomenon

i’m sorry idk what i’m writing lol

and miraculously boy doesn’t have any practices to go to bc all the units just ended promotions so now they have some time to chill and that’s the only reason he’s even allowed on the show

so the rest of the day goes by watching vine compilations and quoting your faves

you and mark get real close bc you guys are the only ones on the show your age,,,the rest are all in their thirties and like yea that’s not that old but you guys are kids y would you hang out with old people ew gross no offense this is for the purpose of the plot line soz

but then mark’s practices start to stack up again and you’re sad bc a) your closest friend on the show is barely there anymore and b) he left you with all the old people which you’re low key salty about cmon sm :(

but you guys still hang out as much as possible when he’s not at practice and you’re not at work

he tells you about all the shit the dreamies were pulling on kun the poor man and you tell him about funny incidents at work

but behind all the laughter you can see he’s tired but you don’t want to pry, especially since your every move is being recorded

so you try your best to make him happy and smile,,,like real smiles, not the fake ones he gives to other members sometimes

he thinks they can’t tell, but you can

sometimes you even go out to restaurants or even like arcades!

he’s even brought the dreamies a few times but that ended real quick after you almost got a black eye from renjun while playing laser tag don’t ask

so yea now you’re tight with dream (except renjun still feels bad about the laser tag incident)

(also he’s scared mark will skin him alive if he gets within a foot of you, he almost died the night of the incident by mark’s own smol hands)

one night the older guys left for some overnight bonding trip idek they were hella secretive about it you and the announcers are convinced they’re in love with each other but you’re in no place to out them

it’s really late like 3 in the morning but you’ve been struggling to go to sleep bc you’re waiting for mark bc he always tells you goodnight after getting home from practice

you’re just about to fall asleep when you hear the door open and you know it’s mark so you wait,,,but he never comes in

he just shuffles past your door to his room

and you’re really concerned bc he’s been looking extra beat lately and this is just the icing on the cake

so you go to the boy’s room and knock on the door but no response

so you push the door open and don’t see him

assuming he’s in the bathroom you’re about to leave but then you hear sniffling,,,coming from the bathroom

and you’re just like ‘oh hell no my boy is crying’

the bathroom is the only place without cameras so you know he wants privacy

making sure you don’t have your mic with you, you go over to the bathroom door and knock, softly whispering his name

the sniffling stops and you hear him moving around before moving to the door

barely giving him a chance to open it you slip and close the door behind you, making sure the cameras can’t see him

and there he is, tired as hell, eyes red, cheeks puffy

you both look at each other before he starts sobbing

and you immediately pull him into you, holding him and swaying side from side, letting him get it out of his system before talking to him

when he finally calms down you slowly pull away and he won’t look up to meet your eyes,,,he’s a lil embarrassed shy bub

so you lift his head up to meet your eyes and you just softly scold him

“I’m your friend mark,,,you don’t have to be worried about being embarrassed in front i mean,,,I saw your eggs and those were horrible”

cue mark laughing a little and your heart sOaRinG

“you can tell me anything, i know you don’t want to make me worry but I worry more about finding you her like this,,,so please,,,rant to me,,,relieve your stress”

and, well, without cameras and mics, mark goes off

telling you about all the stress he’s accumulated from being in all the units an being one of the faces of the group, always having to be on different programs ad make the group look good

you guys are sitting on the floor, him leaning against you while you rub his back and listen, sometimes interjecting with your own thoughts on sm treat your idols better i stg smh

eventually he slows down and now you’re both sitting on the bathroom floor, about to fall asleep at any moment

you move to face him and he does the same

you’re about to tell him you two should go to bed

but you can’t stop looking at him bc he is so so f t and he just poured his hear out to you

and he can’t stop staring at you bc you always look so beautiful but also you’re so kind to him but also won’t hesitate to roast him

so he just,,,starts to lean in,,,and you do too,,,

and then your lips meet and wo w his lips are so soft he’s thinking the same thing askjdh

when you both pull away you smile at each other, resting your foreheads together

mark stands up, pulling you with him to his bed, and you sleep in each others arms :’)

the next morning the girls wake up to find you missing and are about to call 119 but then they go into the boys room and are just like ajhkhfflsd this is too soft and pure and you guys are now tHe power couple of the show

also renjun is even more terrified he can’t even look at you mark is ScARy poor baby

Masterlist

#me: i only see mark in a platonic way and want to be his friEnD #also me: writes this fluffy ass bullshit bYe #i did this in like an hour also #so #yea not too hot #nct imagine #nct au #nct scenario #mark lee #mark lee imagine #mark lee scenario #mark lee au #mark imagine #mark scenario #mark au

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danfanciesphil · 7 years ago

Text

Give Me A Try (New Chapter)

Gay Instagram Model/Bartender Phan AU Part 3

(Part One)

(Part Two)

(Read on Ao3!)

Dan’s in the middle of his break, scrolling through his phone, when a text notification appears at the top of his screen. He drops his bagel into his lap, cursing.

The text is from Phil. He doesn’t know any other Phil’s, so it has to be AmazingPhil, texting him, inexplicably.

He clicks the notification, eyes wide, simultaneously scooping up the bagel bits that have fallen onto his knees.

From: Phil To: Dan im in makeup for a weird photoshoot for some korean clothing brand and they just put loads of silver goo in my hair to make it chromey

As Dan is reading the message, searching between the lines for a reason Phil might be telling him this information, another text pings through.

From: Phil To: Dan whoops, i kinda meant to send that to PJ. but hey, if you’re interested, here’s a pic of me with ‘Kpop Idol Silver Hair Paste’ in lol xx

From: Phil To: Dan [image]

The phone slips from Dan’s fingers, clattering through his legs to the floor of the staff room. Phil has sent him a selfie. An un-edited, un-Instagrammed photo of his breathtaking face, up close. Sure, there’s a weird silvery goop in his usually raven hair, but still. Gingerly, Dan retrieves the phone, a small, strangled sound escaping from his throat as he surveys the image in front of him.

It makes a little more sense now that Phil has informed him that he had actually mistakenly texted the original message, but did the guy really have to follow up with a photo? He must, surely, be aware of Dan’s crush. He witnessed the brunt of Dan’s obsessive stalking in person on his phone, after all.

Bagel entirely forgotten, Dan just stares down into the pixelated blue of Phil Lester’s eyes, wondering how to respond, and if he even should. Deciding eventually that it would be rude not to, Dan shakily types out something he hopes is vaguely witty.

From: Dan To: Phil hahaha wow :’) kpop? more like kpoop. (it looks like bird poop, sorry dude.) x

From: Phil To: Dan hahaha it does ur so right. and if you think thats bad you should see the outfits… xx

Settling back into his chair, Dan bites his lip. As he thinks of a potential response, his eyes wander over to the spot, just to the right of him, where he and Phil had stood not long ago, when it had seemed like maybe, possibly, Phil might’ve…

But obviously that’s absurd.

Dan’s wishful thinking had clearly driven him to the point of hallucination, because the very notion that Phil Lester, AmazingPhil, the famous Instagram model, would ever have looked at Dan as anything more than a random bartender, is laughable.

Dan sighs to himself, then smirks. Well, just because he has no chance, doesn’t mean he can’t utilise his semi-connection to the celebrity to get some behind-the-scenes footage of his fave.

From: Dan To: Phil well now i have to see x

There’s a noticeable pause, and Dan wonders, panicking vaguely, if he may have pushed too far. Is it a little much to ask this of Phil? Maybe he just won’t respond, and Dan will have to quit his job forever, or maybe just spend his shifts on red alert that Phil will wander into the bar, and hide from him if he does-

He texts back.

From: Phil To: Dan [image]

From: Phil To: Dan hot, right? xx

For two long, uninterrupted minutes, Dan is frozen. Then, he lets out a muffled groan of frustration. The photo Phil sent is a full body shot taken by someone else; he’s dressed in an asymmetrical long white t-shirt with several long rips through the chest, some bright pink camouflage trousers, and a shiny silver puffer jacket with a black fur-lined hood. The outfit is a complete disaster, but it doesn’t matter in the slightest. His chest is visible through the slits in the tee; having seen it twice now IRL, Dan is drawn to the slivers he can see. The trousers make his eyes pop, and the jacket matches the silver streaked through his hair.

His pose is casual, feet apart, smirking at the camera, with his hands gesturing to his body as if to say ‘see what i mean?’. If he’d posted this on his Instagram, Dan gets the feeling he’d have saved it to his camera roll anyway, maybe even made it his phone background.

Dan’s done that with a few of his favourite photos of Phil in the past. He won’t even dwell on the time when Phil posted a photo of himself in the bath and Dan, in a semi-sleep-deprived fit of insanity, printed the photo out and stuck it on his wall.

Tyler came over once, weeks later, saw the photo taped above Dan’s bed, and tore the thing down. He’d told Dan, quite rightly, to stop being such a creep and keep his crazed obsessive behaviour to social media like everyone else.

“Who even has physical photos these days?? You’re like a fucking serial killer!”

Dan chuckles at this memory. He’s glad for Tyler, sometimes, even if he’s only good for keeping Dan’s stalkerish behaviour within the realms of normalcy.

Belatedly, he realises it’s been over five minutes and he still hasn’t responded to Phil. Also, his break is close to being over.

From: Dan To: Phil woww. please, phil of the future, tell me what life is like in 2087 x

From: Phil To: Dan stawwp. i keep laughing out loud at what ur saying and now the designer is sending me death glares :’’’D xx

Trying hard to ignore the fact that his dorky jokes are apparently literally making Phil ‘lol’, Dan checks the time, and sighs, typing out another message.

From: Dan To: Phil is the designer a martian? or maybe secretly one of those reptile-people? maybe skin him just to be safe. also my break is over so i gtg. have fun on set of NASA’s moonlanding recreation x

From: Phil To: Dan aww ur at work too? that sux. i forgot that u work at night lol. hope u stay dry this evening ;) xx

From: Dan To: Phil speaking of… why are u at work? isnt it kind of late for a photoshoot? x

From: Phil To: Dan well its 8am here so no haha xx

From: Dan To: Phil where are you? x

From: Phil To: Dan seoul :) hence the… unusual fashion lol xx

Dan’s eyebrows shoot up his forehead. He stands from his chair, throws his half eaten bagel in the trash, and looks around himself. He’s in the staff room - a small, dusty space with a row of falling apart lockers, a couple of chairs and a small table. There’s a hook on the wall which holds a load of unused aprons, and a rusty heater for when it’s especially cold.

He’s about to go back out to serve a load of rowdy customers some overpriced cocktails, then mop a dancefloor sticky with sweat, alcohol, and whatever other liquids might have found their way there. Then, he’s going to go back to his crummy flat way across in Kemptown, unfold his sofabed, and fall asleep to Netflix.

Phil, on the other side of the world in Korea, is having his hair, makeup and wardrobe done by professionals. He’s being treated like a celebrity, no doubt, and pampered excessively. Later, he’ll receive high-definition, professional photographs of himself looking gorgeous, and post them to his Instagram, where millions of people will tell him how stunning he looks.

Dan sighs to himself. How the other half lives.

The following day, Dan wakes up to find that Phil has updated his Instagram story, and posted the photo with the silver goo in his hair. The same one he’d sent to Dan. The caption reads:

Not sure silver hair was a good idea! The designer was going for Kpop, but ended up with Kpoop… can’t wait to show you guys the photos from this shoot! xx

Two things cross Dan’s mind.

First, Dan can now officially state that he had a sneak-peek at an official AmazingPhil photo before it was posted.

Second, the bitch totally stole his joke.

He smiles to himself ruefully, then decides to leave a comment. There’s no way that Phil will even see it - he’s never seen any of Dan’s others, or at least Dan sincerely hopes he hasn’t, as they’re mostly things like ‘choke me’ or ‘slap me round the face with your yaoi hands dad’.

Okay, maybe he tends to leave those sorts of comments when he’s less than sober.

This time, Dan just taps out a simple:

danisnotonfire: joke stealing is a low form of theft phil smh ;)

Still smiling to himself, Dan rolls over onto his side, and settles in to watch Phil’s story. The stories are usually long, silly, and full of adorable clips of Phil being clumsy and cute. As expected, this one is no exception. It’s a tour of Phil’s hotel room in Seoul, which is very posh.

Phil exclaims over the origami hand towels on his bed, the robe provided for him in the wardrobe, and the multiple options on the ‘disco shower’ as he calls it. Just as Dan is marvelling at the panoramic shot Phil has filmed of his view from the balcony, a notification pings at the top of his screen.

amazingphil replied to your comment: joke stealing is…

Dan sits bolt upright in bed, the sheets falling off him. He runs a hand through his messy hair, eyes wide. He clicks the notification before it disappears, heart pounding.

Oh no, oh no, oh no. Dan hadn’t intended for him to actually see. What if Phil thinks he’s being rude? He doesn’t actually mind Phil stealing his stupid joke about the hair goo. It’s an honour, if anything, that Phil finds his dumb joke good enough to post as a caption millions of people will read.

Heart thrumming, Dan finds the response Phil left.

danisnotonfire: joke stealing is a low form of theft phil smh ;)

amazingphil: @danisnotonfire aha i was kinda hoping you wouldn’t see ;D

Another notification pings at the top of his screen.

amazingphil started following you

“Holy shit,” Dan says to nobody.

amazingphil liked your photo

“Fuck,” Dan squeaks, clutching his pillow for support. “Stop it Phil, I’m gonna have a heart attack.”

Curious, Dan clicks the last notification, wondering which photo it was that Phil pressed the little heart for. To his surprise, it’s a selfie, one he took at work around a month ago. He took it during a lull between serving, if he remembers correctly. The lighting hadn’t been awful when he was doing his hourly fringe check in his phone camera, so he’d snapped a pic. It’s nothing special, just a moody expression and a wash of pink lighting across one half of his face.

amazingphil commented on your photo

amazingphil: nice pout ;) xx

Dan falls back into the pillows, mind obliterating itself into a thousand, tiny pieces.

Over the next few weeks, Dan has several text conversations with Phil. They’re usually started by Phil himself, who will - out of what Dan assumes is boredom - sometimes send him a random meme, a musing about his surroundings, or a selfie. For obvious reasons, Dan prefers the latter.

No matter how many times Phil reaches out via text, the surreality of it never fails to send Dan’s mind freewheeling. It always knocks the wind out of his lungs, it always makes him stop dead in his tracks, and it always leaves him struggling to recover for the next few hours. Whenever this happens at work, Tyler never fails to tease him mercilessly.

“Whoops! Please excuse him, sir, his mind has been blended by a single text from his crush,” Tyler tells a customer the fifth time Dan drops a glass behind the bar.

Dan scowls at his friend, but doesn’t try to defend himself. It’s true, after all. One text from Phil has him behaving like a moron. He becomes physically inept, unable to make the simplest drink.

One night, after the bar has closed, Dan and Tyler are cleaning up.

“So when’s he gonna stop torturing you over text and come sweep you off your beer-drenched tootsies?”

Dan rolls his eyes at this. “He’s not, Ty. He’s a rich and famous superstar, and I’m clearing up puke for the third day in a row.”

Dan wrinkles his nose as he continues mopping up the patch of vomit. He’s suspicious at this point; three days in a row is unusual. Is the same person coming in each night and spewing their guts all over the dance floor out of spite? Perhaps it’s some sort of hate crime.

“It’s like a Cinderella story!” Ty exclaims, pirouetting around his broom. “Except it’s gay, which makes it even better.”

Dan scoffs at him. “I’m pretty sure fairytales don’t involve stalking someone over social media and having them find out. He’s just taking pity on me because he saw that first night that I’m a fan.” Dan dunks the mop back in the bucket, turning to Tyler. “Besides, I’m pretty sure he has a boyfriend.”

Tyler sucks in a scandalised breath. “What! Who?”

Dragging the mop back to the supply closet, Dan laughs. “Remember the drunk guy he came with? The one who gave me a lovely Rainforest shower?”

“Him?”

Dan sighs, locks the cupboard, and nods. He digs into his pocket for his phone, and brings it over to show Tyler the photo of Phil and Charlie kissing. Matt, the security guard wanders over to see as well, letting out a low whistle.

“He’s a nonce if he thinks that guy’s behaviour was attractive,” Matt says. “He puked ‘soon as I got him out the door that night. All over the pavement.”

Dan looks at Matt, tilting his head in interest. “He did?”

Tyler plucks the phone out of Dan’s hand, zooming into the photo to have a better look, a frown on his face.

“Yep, your friend there came out, called him an Uber and sent him off,” Matt says. “Doubt pukey there would’ve made it home without him.”

“Nice guy,” Dan mutters, cheeks warm.

“This is staged,” Tyler announces abruptly.

“What?”

“Look,” he says, bringing the phone back over for Dan to see.

He zooms in on the crux of the kiss, right onto Phil’s face. Dan grimaces.

“Ty, I don’t want to see-”

“Shut up and look at his face,” Tyler interrupts, grabbing Dan’s chin and angling it towards the phone. “See how his lips are puckered? All stiff and pointed, like he’s kissing his grandma. And his eyes are open.”

“He’s looking at the camera!”

“Nah, Tyler’s right mate,” Matt says. The gum he’s chewing is making gross squishy sounds right in Dan’s ear as he leans over to look. “He looks awkward as hell.”

Dan narrows his eyes at the photo, trying to see what the others see.

“Besides, didn’t you say he hated that guy?” Tyler asks, clicking off the photo.

Dan tuts, snatching his phone back. “Well, apparently he was just being nice to compensate for the fact his kissing buddy covered me in sugary cocktail.”

He makes the smart decision to step away from this preposterous conversation before he does something stupid. Like allow either of these morons to give him hope that Phil is actually single.

Not that Phil being single would even matter.

“Or he was making it clear that he’s available!” Tyler calls after him as Dan stalks over to the staff room. “He whipped his shirt off for you twice and gave you his number. Do you think he’d do that if he had a boyfriend?”

“Drop it, Ty!” Dan calls back, shutting the staff room door behind him.

He will not let himself fall into the trap of daring to believe he could get someone as gorgeous, as hilarious, as pure and… amazing, as Phil Lester.

He won’t.

This is a good philosophy, in theory.

In practise, it turns out to be a lot more difficult. Dan finds this out to his cost when Phil strolls into Habenero the following Friday with Charlie Hickory at his side. Dan’s stomach sinks as soon as he sees the pair, the butterflies that appear each time Phil so much as acknowledges exploding into dust the moment he registers who Phil is here with.

Phil makes a beeline for the bar, a big smile on his face as he sees Dan. Warily, Dan smiles back, very aware that he is not exactly Charlie’s biggest fan.

“Dan!” Phil sings, chipper as ever.

Blushing already, Dan waves an awkward hand. He will never, he’s sure, get used to hearing his name on Phil Lester’s lips. “Hi. You’re back.”

“Of course! This is my local hangout now,” Phil says, winking. “Great cocktails, cute bar staff, crazy Bingo nights… this place has got it all.”

“Some people might not agree with you about the cocktails,” Dan can’t help himself saying, glancing at Charlie.

Charlie shuffles awkwardly on the spot. “Right,” he says, casting a look at Phil. They share a look that seems loaded with something Dan is not privy to, and then Charlie sighs, turning to Dan. “I wanted to, uh, apologise. About last time. Totally not cool of me to… tell you off like that. I was wasted.”

For an awkward moment, Dan waits for the actual word ‘sorry’ to leave Charlie’s mouth. It becomes obvious fairly swiftly that the dude feels he’s already said enough, so Dan just gives him a tight smile, and clears his throat.

“Oh, yeah man,” he says. “Let’s just… move on, I guess.”

If Charlie won’t say sorry, then Dan’s sure as hell not going to say he forgives him.

“So, drinks?” Phil asks, seeming to sense the taut atmosphere. “Maybe not cocktails?”

Dan can’t help the splutter of laughter, but Charlie shoots a dagger-like glare Phil’s way. It makes Dan’s lip curl; how could anyone be angry with Phil, of all people?

“Maybe some beers?” Dan suggests, teeth clenched. “We have a load of craft beers, or if you’re more into spirits I could make you guys a-”

“I’ll have a vodka and light tonic, no ice,” Charlie interrupts. “A double. If you use regular tonic, I will know.”

“Charlie,” Phil hisses under his breath.

They exchange another loaded look, and again Charlie sighs, turning to Dan with a fake smile. “Please.”

Swallowing the urge to roll his eyes, Dan nods, then gladly turns his attention to Phil. “And for you?”

“Oh,” Phil says, like it’s only just occurred to him that he needs to order as well. “God, I’m so bad at deciding, err…”

As he’s dithering, Charlie sighs. “Are you cool to get these, Phil? I’m gonna go find us a table.”

“You don’t wanna dance?”

“Not in the mood.��

Phil nods, obviously disappointed. “Okay, yeah, I’ll meet you in the back.”

With that, Charlie is gone, slipping into the crowd. The look of distaste must be more evident on Dan’s face than he thinks, because Phil laughs at it.

“I know,” Phil says. “But he does have a few… marginally amiable qualities.”

‘Why have you chosen to be with someone that’s marginally amiable when you’re so great,’ is what Dan wants to ask. Instead, he simply shrugs, deciding to change the subject.

“Have you decided on a drink yet? I’d better get on with making his low-cal dishwater.”

Phil laughs a little, then leans forwards, his smile deepening as he leans across the bar. “Surprise me.”

Something sparks a roman candle in Dan’s stomach, and his skin prickles with the heat it creates. He drags his eyes free of Phil’s with some difficulty, nodding, and turns to make the drinks.

He prepares Phil a ‘PopQueen’ cocktail, which is one of their most popular. It’s inspired by popcorn, along with the trio of Pop Queens that rule the gay music scene: Gaga, RiRi, and Bey. The moscato vodka base is made from Italian grapes to represent Gaga’s heritage, the spiced rum is a shoutout to Bey’s favourite drink, and Riri comes in in the form of a smoky splash of passion fruit bitter. The rest is topped up with popcorn syrup, lemonade, a sprinkle of caramel popcorn kernels, and as many sparkly cocktail sticks as Dan can fit in.

He explains the whole concoction to Phil as he presents it, a little smug because he knows this is an impressive looking cocktail. It’s probably his favourite one to make; the Viniq shimmery moscato vodka makes the drink swirl and shimmer - always exceptionally pretty.

Sure enough, Phil’s mouth drops open at the sight of it. “Okay wow,” Phil says, chuckling. “I’m gonna get drunk tonight, aren’t I?”

“If that’s your plan, this should definitely help you on your way,” Dan says, laughing too. “I wouldn’t recommend having a second if you want to remember your evening.”

Phil leans forwards to take a sip of the PopQueen, moaning around the straw, much to Dan’s dismay. He plucks one of the popcorn pieces off and eats it, eyes closed. In related news, Dan struggles not to fall to the floor. “Dan, you are an artiste,” Phil says. “Popcorn is my all time favourite food.”

“Oh, wow, that’s... lucky, I guess,” Dan stammers, a swell of pride surging up into his chest. “Glad you like it.”

“So, how much?”

“Oh, on the house.” Dan smiles, sliding the cocktail across the bar along with Charlie’s vodka tonic. “I feel bad for not letting you in on the forfeit for Bingo last time.”

The look on Phil’s face softens into something so sweet Dan can taste sugar on his tongue.

“You don’t have to do that,” Phil says softly.

“It’s fine, really,” Dan assures him, all but sliding his elbows across the bar towards him. “I insist.”

A twitch in the corner of Phil’s mouth, and then he’s leaning across the bar. It happens slowly, but Dan still manages to be caught off guard. One moment, he’s watching, bemused, as Phil inches towards him, and the next there’s a light press of paper-soft lips to his cheek. A scratch of stubble grazes over Dan’s skin as Phil leans away.

“Thanks,” Phil tells him, smiling. “You’re sweet, Dan.”

And then he’s turning away, drinks in hand, slipping into the mass of people.

For the next few hours, Dan hopes for Phil to return to the bar for another round. He waits, eagerly, for this moment to come. Instead, Charlie is the one who brings his and Phil’s glasses back over, and waves to flag down Dan’s attention.

He nods in acknowledgement, finishing up the drinks order he’s in the middle of, and sidling over to Charlie. He forces a strained smile.

“Same again?”

“Yeah,” Charlie says, digging out his phone. “And a couple of vodka shots.”

He says nothing else, eyes glued to his phone screen. Dan waits for a moment before moving off, eyes stuck to Charlie’s face. He’s the kind of gorgeous that shouldn’t exist in real life. Unblemished, tanned skin. Clean, dark stubble, lacing his perfect, razorblade jawline. His hair is a swoop of glossy mahogany; even the cut of it looks expensive.

Charlie’s eyes flick up to Dan’s, obviously questioning why he’s staring, so Dan nods, embarrassed, and hurries to make the drinks. From a superficial standpoint, it’s obvious why Phil is with Charlie. Obviously, in Dan’s eyes, Phil is the most attractive man on the planet, but that’s just because he’s Dan’s type. Even he can tell that Charlie is objectively a beautiful human being.

It’s just a shame about everything below the surface level.

Dan pours the two shots Charlie ordered. “All together it’s twenty pounds, please.”

Charlie snorts, then pockets his phone at last. “Figures you’d give Phil the discount.”

He pulls out a twenty and slaps it on the counter.

“Sorry, I can’t give you guys free drinks all night.”

Charlie just stares back at him, a faint, knowing smile caught on his dusty pink lips. One of this thick eyebrows is slightly quirked, sliding an irritation under Dan’s skin. “Listen, Danny, is it?”

“Dan,” he grits.

“Dan,” Charlie says, leaning across the bar. “A little advice, yeah? Don’t be so transparent. It just comes across as pathetic.”

He downs both the shots in quick succession, baffling Dan, who is frozen, mortified, to the spot. Before his brain can thaw enough to stammer out some witty rebuttal, Charlie has swept the drinks off the counter, and is moving away.

Cheeks burning, Dan turns around, trying to calm his boiling blood. He squeezes his fists together, counting to ten, the way he makes himself after all encounters with dickhead customers.

“Hey, sweetcheeks, can we get some drinks over here, please?”

With a deep sigh, Dan unclenches his fists, and turns to the next customer.

At around one in the morning, Dan runs to the bathroom for a minute, and on his way, he sees Charlie. He’s against the wall of the club, near the DJ booth. There’s a muscular, dark-skinned man pressing him there; their faces are close. Dan can’t stop, he’s left Tyler and Dodie to the mercy of the drunks in their worst state - things get rowdy an hour before closing - and he needs to get back there. So, instead, he simply tucks the image away in his mind, to think about later on.

That man, leant against Charlie in a less-than-innocent seeming stance, was certainly not Phil, after all. As he exits the bathroom, he notices that Charlie is gone, as is whoever was with him.

At 1:55am, the lights come on. As usual, an enormous groan chants out of the crowd of patrons on the dance floor, followed by a few pairs awkwardly stepping out of the shadows, some squinting and eye-covering, and the slow, jelly-legged walk to the coat-check area.

“I think I just saw some guy getting up off his knees in the corner,” Tyler says despondently. “Shotgun not mopping the floor tonight.”

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” Dan sighs. “On the dance floor? Really? Why can’t they suck each other off in the bathroom like normal people?”

“Oh, there were definitely people doing that in one of the stalls about an hour ago,” someone says to Dan’s right. The voice, for some reason, sends the hairs up on the back of Dan’s neck.

He turns, wondering when Matt’s voice got so low, only to find that Phil has perched himself on one of the bar stools, the dregs of his cocktail still in a glass in front of him. For a moment, Dan is too stunned at the sight of him to reply. Then, he registers that the lights are on, and cringes, knowing he likely looks frightful. Phil, of course, looks radiant as ever even under the harsh fluorescents, apart from a faint tiredness, visible in the dark circles underneath his eyes.

“You’re still here,” Dan comments. “I thought you guys had gone.”

“Charlie left,” Phil says, looking away from Dan. “Or I assume he did.”

Out of sight, Tyler catches Dan’s eye, making an obscene gesture with his hands before snickering and running off in the direction of the supply closet. Dan just glares after him, pink-cheeked, and turns back to Phil.

“Wait, he left without telling you?”

One of Phil’s shoulders moves towards his neck, then falls. “He does that.”

“Wow that’s… kind of shitty.”

As soon as the words are out, Dan regrets them. He can’t help but think of Charlie’s comment from earlier; it rings in his ears as if the guy had screamed it at him.

Don’t be so transparent. It just comes across as pathetic.

He was right, probably, though Dan had hated hearing it. He should stop being such a suck-up. It must be awkward and cringey for Phil to see Dan so obviously smitten.

Still, Phil throws him a faint smile. “It’s cool. He’s just a flaky guy. A bit of a princess. He grew up rich, so he’s always been a bit superficial. I’m trying to wring the bourgeoisie out of his blue blood.”

Dan snorts with laughter. “In my experience, you can’t filter the dickishness out of people very easily.”

There’s a silence, then. Phil regards him with a faintly curious expression.

“Maybe I’m wrong,” Dan says once the silence gets too uncomfortable. He shrugs, grabbing the rag from his back pocket and starting to wipe down the bar. “I don’t know the guy, really. I’ve just had a couple of unfortunate experiences with him.”

“Oh no,” Phil says, face falling. “What did he do this time?”

Dan laughs, bitterly. “Don’t worry about it. He’s just a little mouthy, is all.”

“Ugh, I’m sorry.”

“Nothing I can’t handle.”

“So, when do you get to leave this place?” Phil asks, playing with his glass. He still hasn’t drunk the remainder of his cocktail. “Or do you sleep here?”

“On weekdays, the bar closes at two, so I get out of here at around two-thirty.”

“Christ,” Phil mutters. “And I thought my job was long hours.”

A laugh bursts out of Dan’s throat, but he covers it as best he can with a cough, turning away. Busying himself with ‘dusting’ some liquor bottles, Dan tries to compose a straight face. Is Phil honestly going to try and argue that his job is difficult? When was the last time that guy ever grabbed a broom, or handled someone’s sticky change?

In a minute, Dan is going to go into the corner of the dance floor, get down on his knees, and clean up some randomer’s come. A few weeks ago he saw Phil swanning about a five-star hotel in Korea. If AmazingPhil’s worst complaint is that he had to have a few questionable outfit choices put on him, and some silvery goo in his hair, then he needs a reality check.

Nevertheless, Dan knows that he can’t say any of this. Not only would he never dream of insulting Phil Lester, but it’s pointless to try and explain the differences between classes to someone in a privileged position. They’ve usually forgotten how to understand.

“Are you close by, at least?” Phil asks, interrupting Dan’s thoughts.

Dan turns back to him. “Kemptown. It’s half an hour’s walk, more or less.”

“You walk?” Phil asks, eyebrows skyrocketing towards his quiff. “At two in the morning?”

“Five in the morning on weekends,” Dan confirms, hiding a smile at Phil’s surprise. “It’s okay, you get used to it. Besides, it’s mostly just drunk idiots chugging cans of cider and threatening to run into the sea. Not too scary.”

Despite Dan’s reassurance, the look of pity and concern on Phil’s face doesn’t subside. After a while, Dan turns from it, feeling awkward. He busies himself with clearing away the last of the empty glasses, yawning into the crook of his elbow. Tonight was rough.

“You should crash at mine,” Phil blurts.

Sure he must have misheard, Dan faces Phil slowly. “Um, what?”

“If you’re exhausted, I mean.” Phil fidgets, fingers tapping against his glass. “Like, on the nights you can’t face walking all the way home, you can totally just sleep on my sofa.”

Speechless, Dan simply stares.

“The couch is pretty comfy,” Phil continues in a ramble, not meeting Dan’s eye. “And my flat is just up the road, literally like a minute away. I’m not saying, y’know, come over every night, ‘cause obviously… that might be an issue, but you can absolutely stay round on, say, Saturday nights when you finish later. That wouldn’t be a problem.”

He’s just being nice. That’s Dan’s only explanation. Phil Lester is a sweetheart of a person, and he got so worried about the hypothetical danger involved in Dan’s walks home, that he offered something big, even though he didn’t really mean it.

Dan is a stranger to him. He needs to decline the polite offer, and let Phil off the hook he accidentally created to string himself up on.

So, Dan forces out a small chuckle, and says: “Oh, no, it’s really fine. Thanks for the offer, that’s really good of you, but I quite like the walk. It’s a nice come down after a busy night.”

Phil nods, chewing his lip. He looks unconvinced. “I’m not just saying it, though.” His voice has dropped to a lower tone. “Like tonight… you’re so tired, I can see it. Just grab some sleep at mine before you head back across town.”

As soon as Phil mentions it, the quilt of his own exhaustion flops around his shoulders, dragging Dan’s bones towards the floor. He tries to picture the stumble back to his crummy flat in Kemptown, loathing each imaginary step.

“You barely know me,” Dan says - one last attempt at refusal.

Sensing he’s won, Phil smiles very slightly, then downs the rest of his cocktail at last. “I don’t know if it’s just me, Dan, but I have this feeling that we’re going to be good friends.”

(Part 4!)

#phan #phanfic #bartender au #phanfiction

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chongjojunsalsa · 7 years ago

Text

Ice Pops

Word Count: 3079 words

Pairing: Seokjin/Everyone (because i’m thirsty like that)

Summary:

sunshinehobi i don’t know about you guys but that ice pop made my boner pop

[ alternatively titled: Popsicles, because they have a different name for it everywhere I swear]

Note: also posted on ao3, but tumblr is irresistible. come find me or continue reading under the cut!

The tension surrounding the coffee table in the Bangtan dormitory is thick and heavy and not something everybody is willing to wake up at 2am for. An emergency meeting, Yoongi had called it, while frantically knocking on everybody’s door in the middle of the night, his face a shade paler than it already is.

So around the table they sit, muttering under their breath how this is fucking stupid, let me go back to sleep, groggy eyes directing expectant stares at Min Yoongi while he paces back and forth, trying to think of a way to put his thoughts into words without making it sound too blunt. Nobody in their sleep-deprived state seems to notice that Seokjin is not sitting in his usual seat, wedged in between Taehyung and Yoongi, except for Jimin, who raises his hand half-heartedly and mumbles, “Why are we conducting an emergency meeting without Jin hyung?”

At the slight mention of Seokjin, Yoongi freaks. He slaps a hand over Jimin’s mouth with unnecessary strength, wide eyes darting around maniacally, his voice urgent and frenzied as he hisses, “Shut up, he’ll hear you.” Jimin grunts in pain and shoves Yoongi away, eyebrows furrowed in irritation, it’s too early for Yoongi’s bullshit.

Namjoon flattens his lips into a thin line, he knows how Yoongi is when Seokjin stays elsewhere for the night. “Yoongi hyung, Jin hyung isn’t even here, he can’t possible hear you,” he points out and barely manages to avoid the hand coming for his mouth.

“Yah! This is really an emergency!” Yoongi slams his hand onto the table in frustration unexpectedly, startling an already dozing off Taehyung and causing him to tumble off the couch. He glares daggers at Yoongi as he seats himself back onto the couch, a hand cradling the elbow that he’d hit on the coffee table. All of a sudden, the members are alert, it’s rare to see their second eldest hyung this worked up. He wouldn’t act this way unless it were really an emergency. They exchange worried glances and comply immediately when he gestures for them to come closer.

Yoongi has them huddled towards the centre of the table and they wait, at the ready - they think - of whatever he has to say to them. He lowers his voice to a soft drawl, “Have you ever seen hyung eat an ice pop?” All at once, they scatter, profanities rolling off the tips of their tongues in a series of “fuck this, i’m out“s and ”what the fuck, hyung“s. Like Jimin had mentioned earlier, it’s too early for Yoongi’s bullshit. In fact, any time is too early for Yoongi’s bullshit.

“Hyung, you’re drunk, aren’t you?” Hoseok presses the back of his palm on Yoongi’s cheek, to which the latter slaps his hand away indignantly and scowls.

“I’m not drunk, you shits,” he snarls and blocks their way as they try to make their ways back to their respective rooms (read: attempt) with his small stature.

“Let us go and Jin hyung won’t hear a word about this,” Jeongguk finally speaks up, the first words he had spoken since they had gathered around the coffee table, a wry smile playing on his lips. Yoongi’s expression darkens considerably, but he concedes anyway, he won’t hear the end of it if his hyung were to corner him and question him about the emergency meeting he held at 2am in the morning, only to ask the members if they’d seen him eat an ice pop. Truly mortifying.

But Yoongi knows he can’t possible go to war all by himself again, it was already that difficult surviving the first time. He needs comrades, he needs a plan.

suga&spice created emergency meeting. suga&spice invited rapmoney to emergency meeting. suga&spice invited sunshinehobi to emergency meeting. suga&spice invited chimmers to emergency meeting. suga&spice invited taelien to emergency meeting. suga&spice invited seaguk to emergency meeting. suga&spice invited everythingnice to emergency meeting.

suga&spice oh fuck

suga&spice removed everythingnice from emergency meeting.

suga&spice ok hear me out u have to see him eat an ice pop

chimmers so that wasn’t a bad dream

sunshinehobi wtf hyung

taelien yoongi hyung rly wants us to watch jin hyung suck a popsicle off

chimmers ice pop*

sunshinehobi theyre the same thing dumbass

suga&spice how did u know

sunshinehobi that they’re the same thing??? i’m not a dumbass like jimin lol

chimmers bitch

suga&spice no as in that is literally how he eats an ice pop like hes eating d

sunshinehobi oh my god

chimmers youre kidding

taelien LOL R U SRS

seaguk that probably happened in your dream hyungie~~~

suga&spice i texted jin hyung and he said hed get ice cream w us shut up maknae

taelien ice cream or ice pops??

suga&spice hed get an ice pop either way

chimmers this better not be disappointing

sunshinehobi ive always wondered what jin hyung looked like eating d

chimmers ^

taelien ^

seaguk ^

suga&spice dont make me regret this wheres namjoon btw

seaguk still sleeping lol

suga&spice wake him up and meet me outside the dorm in five

“I don’t get what’s so interesting about Jin hyung choosing between Zesty Lime and Cherry Bomb,” Namjoon tells Yoongi blandly, to which he responds with a flick to his cheek - right in the dimple - and an annoyed but otherwise barely audible ‘sh’.

“Wait for it, you impatient fuck,” Yoongi grits his teeth at the other members’ fidgety restlessness. Seokjin was taking his time to choose a popsicle, completely oblivious to the fact that the other members had been hiding behind the shelf in the convenience store, in patient wait for him to just shove it down your throat already.

Shut up, Jimin.

After twenty seconds or so of flirting with the cashier, she blushingly tells him that he need not pay for it, to which he replies with a sly wink and a flying kiss. She looks like she’s about to faint, but immediately tends to the next customer as soon as he shoves a packet of cigarettes onto the counter. Yoongi rolls his eyes, but it’s better that she doesn’t witness what he knows is about to happen.

When Seokjin is done unwrapping the ice pop, the other members’ incessant pockets of whispers cease and they wait with bated breath for what Yoongi had been fearing for his life for - except Namjoon, the bastard doesn’t check his messages.

He first wraps his full lips around the tip of the Zesty Lime ice pop he had opted for, shuddering in unsullied delight as the refreshing iciness melts onto his tongue in a burst of flavour. With his lips still on the ice pop, his tongue pokes out from on top his bottom lip, first to collect any juice that has dissolved onto his bottom lip, then to curl around the popsicle and lick a stripe towards his lips before disappearing into his mouth again.

Fuck, Yoongi can already feel the wretched and all-knowing twitch in his jeans.

Without warning, Seokjin shoves the whole ice pop into his mouth, the whole fucking thing, his plump lips stretching around the end of the popsicle, red from effort and the frigid ice pop. Yoongi can’t possibly ignore the small choke erupting from the back of Seokjin’s throat or the tears bunched around the edges of his eyes, all the while allowing the ice pop to stay in its place. The last straw is when he hollows his cheeks.

Yoongi dares to chance a glance towards the other members. Namjoon has a trembling hand over his mouth, Hoseok’s jaw has gone completely slack, Jeongguk is muttering a long string of curse words under his breath, Jimin’s tongue is swirling on his bottom lip, and save the best for last, Taehyung’s face is a brilliant shade of red. Yoongi would laugh at them if it weren’t for the gradually taut feeling in his jeans, fuck, and he knows it isn’t even the worst part yet.

And as if Seokjin had read Yoongi’s mind, he moans around the popsicle in unadulterated pleasure, eyes lolling up for a split second before flitting back to maintain a loving gaze at the popsicle, painfully oblivious to the mortified stares the others were giving him (cashier included, whoops). When he decides that he’s done - thank God - he pulls the ice pop out of his mouth, the bright green of the popsicle reappearing at a sickeningly slow pace, and finally, finally coming out of his mouth with a slick ‘pop’ sound. (Yoongi vaguely remembers wondering if that’s why they called it an ice pop.) Everybody tries their best to ignore the glossy string of saliva connecting Seokjin’s mouth and the ice pop.

“What– what the fuck was that?” Jeongguk is the first one to speak up, his voice coming out as a squeak more than anything.

“That was way worse than any porn I’ve ever watched,” Namjoon has the cheek to say, and Hoseok hits his shoulder.

Yoongi smiles bitterly. “It’s already my second time witnessing this, and I still can’t get used to it.”

At this, Jimin chuckles and licks his lips. “Au contraire, Yoongi hyung, I think I could get used to this.”

“You’re disgusting.”

“I cannot believe you’ve been hiding the good stuff from us, hyung,” Hoseok mumbles, still recovering from the daze.

“Firstly, I’ve only seen it once before this. Secondly, who are the fucking idiots who ignored me when I was trying to tell them about this?” Yoongi sneers, face marked into a frown.

“You didn’t tell us he was going to deep-throat a-”

“Yah! What’s going on behind here? A secret cult meeting that I wasn’t invited to? I’m hurt,” Seokjin’s voice joins the conversation unexpectedly, his signature squeaky laugh bouncing off the shelves, and everybody startles. “Aren’t any of you going to get anything?”

Nobody knows how to respond for fear that he had been listening in on their conversation the whole time. To everybody’s relief, Taehyung breaks the silence.

“Ah,” Taehyung gestures towards a stream of juice flowing down Seokjin’s finger, onto his palm and down his arm. “Hyung, do you need a tissue for that?”

Seokjin responds in the form of a slight shake of his head before bending his head towards the trickle of juice down his right arm, and licking it, his tongue curling and flicking at every single last drop of juice. For some godforsaken reason however, nobody seems to be able to take their eyes of him, the way his tongue works up his arm (his arm, for God’s sake) in a way no person should ever be allowed to. Ever.

He pauses halfway, somewhere at his wrist, hooded eyes suddenly darting up at the rest of them, holding them in an accusatory stare, and Yoongi thinks it’s specifically directed at him. He gulps. Seokjin’s gaze doesn’t tear away from them until he’s done, and when he is, he simply beams at them and walks away, stuffing the ice pop down his throat once again.

“Do you think he knows?” Jeongguk croaks out, and everybody looks over at Yoongi apprehensively. And Yoongi doesn’t know how to respond to that.

Soon enough, everybody decides on an ice pop, Taehyung and Jeongguk opting for none - dietary reasons, they called it - and they make their way out of the convenience store, steely eyes too trained on Seokjin to notice a certain somebody sidling up next to Seokjin.

“Jin hyung, do you want to try my ice pop? Mine’s pink,” Jimin has an arm around Seokjin’s wide shoulders, his other arm outstretched towards the taller male in an attempt to feed him the Cherry Bomb. Seokjin gladly accepts any offers of free food he sees and allows his tongue to coil around the tip of the dark pink ice pop, humming in approval of Jimin’s choice. Jimin’s internal victory dance is short-lived as he is torn away from Seokjin’s side by a wild Taehyung.

“Hyung, I know you don’t like using tissues, but you’re making a mess,” comments Taehyung as he swipes his thumb on the corner of Seokjin’s lips, and bringing it to his mouth. Seokjin subconsciously flicks his tongue at the spot Taehyung’s thumb had been resting just moments ago, leaving Taehyung very flustered, who resorts to burying himself in Jin’s broad back to hide his pink cheeks. Yoongi would like to say that this was the end of the maknae line’s tactics, but it isn’t.

“Can I have a lick at your ice pop, hyung?” Jeongguk appears out of nowhere, and flashes a blinding smile at Seokjin. Yoongi lets out an audible gasp, the nerve of that brat, he knows how weak Seokjin is to the maknae, he’ll have to depend on the fact that Seokjin can be stingy with his food.

Seokjin chuckles at Jeongguk and ruffles his hair. “Only for my Jeongguk,” Seokjin coos and extends the arm holding the popsicle to Jeongguk, who responds more than happily by sticking it in his mouth and side-eyeing anybody who was throwing jealous glares at him. He smiles around the ice pop, but eventually moves away from it, a satisfied grin playing at his lips.

The elder hyungs can’t help but click their tongues at their dongsaengs, immature brats, Namjoon says. Except that he says it with the tone of voice that gives away the fact that he wants to be young enough and cute enough to get away with anything those “immature brats” just did, Yoongi duly notes.

Yoongi knows better than to brood over this, so he does the only thing he knows how to do in this sort of situation. He, in this opportune moment, decides that he is going play the roommate card, the card deemed the most despicable in the Bangtan dormitory, according to everybody but Yoongi.

But Seokjin beats him to it.

“Yoongi-chii, can I have a bite of yours?” Seokjin had somehow managed to shake off the three brats and sling his arm around Yoongi, a smile on his lips as he leans in to taste his ice pop, with absolutely no regard for Yoongi’s decision. Consent is important, kids.

“Yah, this hyung,” Yoongi bites back at him - albeit a little too affectionately - in the pretence of not enjoying all the attention the oldest hyung was spoon-feeding him. He loves it, he’s just had enough dignity to keep it in his pants so far, which reminds him of the boner residing in his jeans, which he has artfully hidden with a jacket tied around his waist.

Hearing Seokjin burst into his trademark laugh, Yoongi can’t help but smile.

chimmers changed his nickname to jinmin. jinmin changed the group name to jin’s tongue appreciation cult.

jinmin ah thats better

suga&spice changed the group name to he will call the cops on us. jinmin changed the group name to jinnie oppa fan club!!!!.

suga&spice fuck no only the nickname stays

suga&spice changed the group name to emergency meeting.

jinmin i like my nickname very much tqvm

jinmin updated the group picture.

suga&spice is that when did u take that wtf park jimin u creep

seaguk ah

seaguk changed his nickname to jinkook.

jinkook i dont mind it though???

taelien changed his username to taejin.

taejin neither does yoongi hyung but he isnt about to admit it

jinmin ;) no need to say thank you boys but i will fight you on the nickname thing

suga&spice that is a fucking picture of jin hyung eating the popsicle if he chances upon any of our phones were dead

jinkook i like living on the edge

suga&spice u are all horrible people i never should have let u sorry bastards know about this istfg

taejin esp park jimin u sneaky rat

jinmin jeongguk though????

jinkook ha

rapmoney since when did we have this group

suga&spice u were sleeping

jinkook arent you lucky we woke you up

taejin lol joonie hyung went back offline

jinkook lol

suga&spice uhh btw just asking but how do you change your nickname in a group

jinmin thought you’d never ask press the settings bar at the top right corner of the group chat the group chat ok if you do it elsewhere you’ll change your nickname in that chat there’s a button all the way at the bottom that says change nickname press it

suga&spice removed nickname function in emergency meeting.

taelien YOONGI HYUNG i h8 u

suga&spice wait i swear that was an accident uh wtv it was confusing anyways

sunshinehobi am i late to the party anyways i don’t know about you guys but that ice pop made my boner pop #shameonme

chimmers #shameonme

seaguk #shameonme

rapmoney #shameonme

taelien #shameonme

suga&spice oh look joonie’s back on and btw all of u are nasty ass bitches

seaguk really now

chimmers i think you should be the most ashamed

suga&spice #shameonme

sunshinehobi #shameonyou

chimmers #shameonyou

suga&spice STOP

taelien #shameonyou

It’s an hour to showtime and the members of Bangtan Sonyeondan are holed up in their dressing room, some of them drumming their fingers on the pristine white couches while staring at the wall on the opposite side of the room, some of them aggressively tapping on their phones, letting slip a curse word or two once in a while.

Seokjin, meanwhile, is thinking of what to do for his next Eat Jin, and he’s hungry to hear the members’ opinions on the idea he’s settled on.

“For my next episode of Eat Jin, I was thinking I could have something sweet to eat,” Seokjin muses out loud, tapping a finger on his chin. “A popsicle, maybe?”

At the mention of popsicle, all the members swivel their head around at him with wide eyes and parted lips and flushed cheeks. “No,” they respond, creepily in sync.

Seokjin’s head tips to one side, doe eyes wide with innocence, eyebrows arched up in confusion. “Why?”

“No reason,” Jeongguk replies hastily. Hoseok offers an unapologetic shrug.

Seokjin looks offended and while crossing his arms over his chest, huffs, “Then each of you is going to buy me a popsicle to make up for that.” His frown quickly melts into a toothy smile.

Taehyung is sent into a coughing fit, along with Namjoon. Jimin merely mirrors Seokjin’s expression.

And Yoongi doesn’t quite miss the way the edges of Seokjin’s lips quirk up into a knowing smirk.

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