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leda-confessions-and-opinions · 6 years ago

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Amb’s Mooncallers 2 Review: Chapters 1-10

I’m going to go into detail about Mooncallers: Shadows Burn, so if you haven’t read through Ch 10 yet, don’t read this post! Likewise, don’t spoil beyond these chapters. If you would like to check out my chapter reviews for the first book, Mooncallers: Stars Wake, here are the links! (Ch 1-10 review) (Ch 11-20 review) (Ch 21-30 review). Now, for the return of the long boi.

I must give credit where credit is due. These first ten chapters flow infinitely better than the first ten chapters in her first book. To me, the main reason why the flow is so much smoother is because Leda took the time to flesh out the opening scene, thus giving it purpose and allowing it to develop in the sequential chapters. After jumping overboard and being saved by the Divines, Luxea and Ares are trapped on Mythos, an island home to the Mythics, and prior to their arrival, has never been visited by outsiders. Given a stable setting, Leda can develop Luxea, Ares, and comfortably introduce a new tag-along character, Shir, an agender being of crystal, like the other Mythics. I think Luxea and Ares are gaining a bit more substance to them, and from what it seems, their relationship will probably develop into something more. Likewise, Leda can make the setting turn unstable from Widow’s invasion. Luxea is able to mitigate the invasion by suddenly developing a greater control of her magic abilities.

From the first book, I was left really unsatisfied by Widow as this “great evil” since I thought her character was very telling-more-than-showing. I also felt like the way the “evil” was introduced in the story occurred all-at-once, instead of a gradual growth. In Ch 5, we gain insight into Widow’s intent for destruction:

“’Why are you doing this?’ [Luxea]

Widow’s wicked grin flattened, and then something else appeared. Pain. Human pain. ‘Because I hate you,’ was all She said.

That statement would forever weigh on Luxea.” (p. 60-1)

Again, I’m left kind of meh-ed. The idea of a goddess experiencing human pain is interesting, but I want more. We also learn that Widow has stolen another goddess and is burned whenever she touches Luxea due to something that Oscerin gifted her with. This invasion leaves Shir as the only Mythic left alive, so they joins Luxea and Ares on their voyage back to Tzapodia. The chapters regarding the civil/political unrest in Tzapodia are interlaced well with the chapters regarding Mythos, allowing for a smooth setting transition.

After Ares discovers that a general was using the Prince’s presumed death for political advantage, he forcefully removes him from the Mooncaller Council and inducts Luxea as the “Seer of Tzapodia” due to Oscerin’s ability to “see” through Luxea. This new position is met by slight antipathy by some members (since essentially, they think that her position is bs and was rewarded to her just because Ares likes Luxea which tbh I kinda agree with), but both Ares and Luxea end these opinions as soon as they surface. Otherwise, wholesome moments occur with Shir, the reunion of the Mooncallers, a baby’s birth, and the recovery of Runa’s mom. At times these moments are a bit slow/played out for me, but it’s the beginning of the book, so it’s okay.

As the story’s flow has definitely gotten better, I still have some qualms with the flow of the writing. It’s not an insane problem, but it happens often enough that it has made itself apparent in her writing style, and that is the return of the “Theasuraus.com” words. Here’s why I’m being nitpicky about them: it’s not because I don’t like big words in my books, but because I think it really interrupts the flow or emotions of a scene. It’s weird though because these larger words are intermingled with more “simple” words and phrases, causing an odd mix overall.

Here are some lines where I thought a “Theasuraus.com” word was unnecessary.

- “’Yes,’ said Shir unambiguously. (p. 64) When I first read it, I didn’t really remember what “unambiguously” meant so I stopped and looked it up. I think just saying “with certainty” would’ve sufficed.

- “Luxea sat down and harked [Ares’] spitting and the chain on his neck scraping the stone.” (p. 63) Instead of “listened to”.

- “Luxea grinned ebulliently.” (p.76) Again, I had to stop and look up what the word meant. “Enthusiastically” would’ve suffice.

- “Keeper Vessias soon came to worship Luxea. Before now, he’d been the only scholarly member of the council. That isn’t to say that all brains around the table weren’t impressive, but she was the perfect balance between pedagogic and frivolous.” (p. 106) Literally if you google “scholarly,” “pedagogic” is a synonym, but its definition and the way I’ve heard it used strictly relates to “teaching.” Teaching isn’t involved in this scene; thus, I feel like Leda used the “big word” without really knowing what it means. Also, frivolous doesn’t relate to pedagogy, so idk what Leda’s going for.

- Brielle had a response somewhere that I thought was also weird, but I can’t find it

There is also no inner dialogue in the book, thus the words used to describe the manner in which the characters present their dialogue is pivotal to how they express themselves, and sometimes these words fall flat. Additionally, there are times when I think a character’s dialogue is a bit out of place.

Example: [Ares]: “’Because of that, [Luxea] will be, from this day forth, counterpart of the Speaker under the title of ‘Seer of Tzapodia.’ Do you accept, Miss Siren?’…There just wasn’t a more difficult ‘yes’ or ‘no’ question…With her tongue wrung out of words, she hummed, ‘Mhm.’” (p.94-5)

The wordiness and unclarity of passages have really subsided though, which is great, and the weird similes/metaphors that Leda used a ton in the first book aren’t present in the second book. The only lines that I thought were odd were, “his pleas were sugar to Widow” (p.60) and “Isaak’s stare inflicted frostbite” (p. 73).

Finally, Leda mentioned in her live stream that to avoid writer’s block, she would jump around to a different chapter instead of finishing them off sequentially. Because of this (possibly?), I felt like Leda would reintroduce certain characters and places over and over again. For example, every time Runa is mentioned, her backstory of being a freed child courtesan is mentioned, and after the fourth time it gets really repetitive. The same happens with Avari being referenced as Luxea’s mentor. Lastly, just as it happened with Ares, Luxea gets her name mispronounced (p. 114), which again I think is just a jab at how the reader reads her name.

Overall, I think a lot is introduced in these first 10 chapters (25% of the book) that can be well-developed later on. I hope you enjoyed this review! Feel free to submit your own outtake on the novel or comments about what I just said! Overall, I give this section of chapters a 3.5/5 stars!

Amb

#book club

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