#ty for reading sorry for negativity i will hopefully get over the fuckery soon
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man. stuck in this really awful hellish midground of wanting to do things with my ocs but having no real ideas & feeling so bad about my stuff anytime i try
plus weirdly high social anxiety reawakening old worries about being in a community but feeling like i don't fit and it SUCKS i want my brain to get over it bc i know it's not true.but aaagh. agony
#i feel so creatively...boring? if that makes sense. like i can only make silly little things#and not anything exciting or particularly interesting. and there's nothing wrong with making silly little things#but i wish i was better at Big Things! it's like i hit a wall#and i wanna talknto people but when i get in a stupid rut. trying to talk to people is like trying to grab words made of water#anf i feel like i'm faking it. somehow. and like i don't Fit. which is silly#does this make sense. probably not. but maybe yelling about it will make me feel better#i will probably delete this i just want to Yell. bc i do want to do stuff. but my brain is causing havoc#don't suggest taking a break bc i have tried that and will carry on trying maybe#ty for reading sorry for negativity i will hopefully get over the fuckery soon#fredspeaks
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