#two short women
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need legwarmers for an 80s look for when i go bowling on sunday because i must commit to the bit
#i am not up early#i have not yet gone to sleep#we were on track for a quick close until we had to deal with the customers from hell#and we recently changed the security company we use#so not only do we no longer have my favourite doorman#we also have absolutely incompetent doormen#he did nothing when all the staff were being screamed at and threatened#and the staff were like#two short women#one short man#underweight man#and guy with a very dodgy elbow#so we wouldn't have been able to do anything if it escalated#and the doorman was like high and didn't think to radio to get someone from a nearby bar#he was marginally better than doorman who id'd me and i of all people somehow intimidated into letting me in without looking at my id#ephemeriee.txt
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saw this video earlier of this guy (i'm guessing soon to be dad) testing out baby names by pretending to call his kid for dinner and my immediate thoughts were just about how abby coded it was 😭 like i can perfectly imagine reader waddling into the kitchen because abby keeps shouting out random names and… is she slamming something?
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“abs?” your face contorts with pure confusion as you enter the kitchen space to your shared home, finally somewhat getting an idea of what abby was up to. there she is, opening and closing the oven on repeat and mildly shouting out random girl names.
“yea- why aren’t you sat down?” cutting off her own sentence, she leaves the oven hung open to hurry to your side, her strong arms immediately wrapping around your waist (as best as possible). abby had become very attentive over the past few weeks, if you don’t spend 90% of the day (the other 10% is for peeing) sat down then she has failed in her mission to be the best wife imaginable!
quirking a brow up at her, you lean ever so slightly to the side and nod your head in the direction of your open stove, “i wanted to know what you were doing” you say innocently, your eyes meeting once more for a split second before she’s pressing soft kisses to your forehead.
“jus’ testing out names, thought it might be easier if i tried them out for real” as she speaks she thinks she’s being slick by ushering you back into the living room, but the honest truth is that you just wanted her to take care of you. i mean, you’re carrying her baby, it’s the least you deserve is it not?
her big hands take a firm (yet gentle) grip on your arm as she slowly and carefully lowers you down onto the sofa, taking a seat beside you once you’ve stopped fidgeting and are sitting comfortably. “abby you know you could’ve just.. asked me? i have a name in mind anyways.”
“oh yeah?” abby turns to fully face you now, one of her knees coming up to rest just beside your thigh.
“how does nora sound? i just- i know how much she meant to you and thought-” your ears perk up at the sound of the woman next to you sniffling, your head immediately snapping towards her with a look of intense concern written across your face.
“it’s perfect” is all she can manage, voice wobbling ever so slightly as her hand reaches out to gently caress the top of your stomach. the two of you remain that way for a while, her soft sniffles echoing through the room with your hand now lay atop her own.
well, that is of course until abby tests if the name is really perfect the proper way. you hear the oven door creak open and slam a few times, followed by the shouts of various renditions of “nora” + “dinner’s ready” and finally she’s reached her verdict.
“yep! perfect!”
#just a lil short idea i had !!#let’s just ignore the fact two women can’t biologically have a baby okay??#let me live out my fantasy#abby anderson#abby anderson x you#abby anderson fluff#abby anderson x reader#abby anderson x female reader
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lesbian beauty & the beast 👑💔
#original#beauty and the beast#actually posting art today too wo!w!! hi#ive been working on this one in short bursts for the last week and ahalf or so#im so normal about this and it doesnt reflect on my mental health in any way#love my beast women gross and handsome and torn apart by the agonies.#two women going through it. i hope you can infer.
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every ship is simultaneously real and non-real depending on whether it fits my narrative at any given moment. schrodingers ship. schipdinger
#i think she should be allowed to like women#and the narrative presented by this could be really interesting if played right#two girlfriends and they're mortal enemies but they dont kill eachother for me#i probably mega flubbed the angles and proportions cause i hate the worker hats and accidentally made liz too short but whatever#i was gonna draw something else but im lazy. maybe later#lizzys textboxes include typos and shortenings and whatever but it doesnt affect her actual speak#murder drones#art#murder drones lizzy#murder drones v#serial designation v#murder drones doll#i dont know any of the ship names you guys can figure it out
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I see so so many videos and comments and discussion from people including artists expressing grievance and cringing in one way or another at modern and performance art, and all I can think is damn. That sort of art is really goddamn effective when it gets this much publicity and attention from people trying to cope because it gets under their skin so easily and not realizing the irony
At this point there's no modern or performance art I don't respect (other than ones that cause harm to animals 😐) just for being able to so effortlessly get reactions out of people. Like the "who's afraid of yellow, red and blue" paintings that to most people look like solid boring colors, 'how in the world is that art?' and all that, and yet, fittingly for its name, it gets vandalized (and is also impossible to restore because no one can replicate the intricate technique of the author). Some things never change. Godspeed modern and performance artists
#I used to not get much of modern or performance art and there's still a lot I dont but with each video I see dissing it I love it more#I never stop thinking about this one yt short of some guy going “this is art?? wouldnt you want some REAL art?”#and then they show off their dem0n slayer standees or something lmao. girl. honestly effective advertising though but makes me laugh#There is so much fucking awesome and interesting modern and performance art out there that really does commentate on the world effectively#when this is how people react by default then of COURSE it does. It's so easy to get a strong reaction#like the one performance art piece of the woman who just stood there and laid out a bunch of tools for people to use with no instruction#and gradually people got more brave and abused the hell out of her. only a few used the tools to do anything nice but still she stood there#the only performance art that everyone should disapprove of is the one that harms animals#two women I think made this piece that was a curtain made out of small live animals and crustaceans. that shit can go#and yet every video trying to disapprove of modern art showcases pieces that look interesting to me and not that#like its so easy to point at that and go “guys this is not art!” like yeah. it isnt. but only that#blabber
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short hair milly save me
#charlie’s art#trigun maximum#rings the sapphic dinner bell#milly thompson#elendira the crimsonnail#millydira#elenmilly#EM#ME#with a hint of merylmillydira#insurance nails polycule save me#two big women and a short king could save the world
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I'd give you my heart if you needed it... ✨🍃
#timothée chalamet pics#timothee chamalet#timmy chalamet#timothée chalamet#timothee edit#timothée imagine#timothée x reader#timothée chamalet#timothy laurence#little women#evermore#folklore#love of my life#taylor swift#edit pictures#red taylor’s version#fearless taylor’s version#speak now taylor’s version#all to well short film#bones and all#cmbyn#dune part two#dune part 2#dune fanart#dune movie#dune#wildest dreams#wonka posting#wonka movie#wonka
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Katherine A aka Abby and Melena A aka Maria via Watch4beauty
#watch4beauty#w4b#russian model#beautiful woman#beautiful women#katherine a#abby#melena a#maria#lesbian#two women#great legs#outdoors#women in shorts#legs and heels
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i generally have a good time picking apart and discussing the writing decisions i think are clunky in theses shows but some of the very real garbage ass worldviews that seep into this whole thing are so vile and legitimately disappointing. it's one thing to read like a wattpad fic but like. holy fucking shit this show just hates women
if you do something (not even something shitty a chunk of the time. just Something.) then the show will ask 'well were you a woman about it' to determine whether you were in the wrong or not
#helluva boss critical#still havent watched sinsmas properly but i have much to say#based on two things in particular#this may be swinging a bat at a hornets nest but. im in awe#butch lesbian watches a show that dislikes women and comes out of it cranky more at 11#i want to find the whole 'millie baby% speedrun' thing funny but like#god her entire character revolves around babying the men around her.#its like someone on the team just thinks 'what else do you do with women characters'? its just sad.#it took this show like 2 seasons to pass the bechdel test. in a short#god dude.
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Recasting ds9 characters with (semi) era appropriate action stars, the thrilling sequel to my tng post
Danny Glover as Benjamin Sisko
Michelle Yeoh as Kira Nerys
Geena Davis as Jadzia Dax
Pierce Brosnan as Miles O’Brien
Oded Fehr as Julian Bashir
Timothy Dalton as Odo
Mark Dacascos as Quark
Michael Jai White as Jake Sisko
Maggie Cheung as Keiko O’Brien
Milla Jovovich as Ezri Dax
#the biggest stretch is probably marky mark as quark but you gotta understand. guys that look like armin shimerman weren’t action stars#I went with someone relatively short with a lot of charm. and he’s bald now! three for three#I can’t make another one of these for other shows because frankly. there’s not enough women. but I will hit you with some one of the ones#I’ve been thinking about. Uma Thurman as 7 of 9. Angelina Jolie as Tpol which probably means Brad Pitt as Trip. Wes Studi as Chakotay.#probably Denzel Washington as Tuvok. John Travolta as Phlox though I did want Nick Cage as well.#and two castings that I DONT agree with but WOULD probably happen anyway. Jennifer Lopez as B’Elanna. Lucy Liu as Hoshi. and maybe like a#Drew Barrymore for Kes if we’re sticking with a Charlie’s Angels moment.#oh and. while he wasn’t a hot ticket item at tbe time. kevin costner as archer#it’s deeply funny how IMMEDIATELY much more niche this one is#ds9
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geralt is also a most real depiction of good quality fatherhood and great girldad representation because EVEN THOUGH witchers don’t even experience aging at the same rate as non-GMO humans, EVEN THOUGH it would be “biologically impossible,”
geralt having had been raising a pre-teen girl for maybe a few months to a year already “gave the impression of having aged,” his “face slashed by wrinkles.” the emotional toll on this man from raising she-devil ciri
and this is only the very beginning of the saga. BEFORE everything goes to shit. the wrinkles have set in
#i know this is description is colored by triss’… [sighs] aroused… point of view#but the lines in the second screenshot are such a good description of him come on 🥺#same with when cahir sees ciri then him at thanedd#it’s not canon but please also apply to yennefer post-thanedd 🙏#can you imagine geralt and yennefer reuniting at stygga castle and yennefer only got even more MILFy#sorry. who said that#it’s actually surprising that when geralt frees her from her shackles#we don’t get a paragraph about how he was down bad. not the time geralt but you know he would be thinking ‘ravishing’#meanwhile yennefer is covered in blood and bruises and her hands are fucked from torture and geralt’s still adoring her beauty#yennefer: at her most undignified | geralt: i would worship her#yes yes i know they were defeated and horribly empty at stygga castle#but i’m just saying despite it all the love and attraction persisted. despite IT ALL#you know like they changed so much and got even more fucked up and traumatized#well i’m just raising my hand to say well also they also got sexier.#actually fuck it remember she appears like a titaness for a brief moment. her short queen REALNESS#like i do think geralt deciding to split up is what further doomed the hanza (they were already doomed but you know)#(it was very scooby doo of him to do that)#(on the way there) angoulême sees stygga on the cliffside jutting out above the lake: what?! that creepy castle… nuh-uh…#milva: … would you do it for a bump of fisstech? | angoulême: … | milva: two bumps of fisstech?#um anyways#i was going to say that once geralt freed yennefer it was OVERRR for vilgefortz and skellen and co#BOOO you were all fucked. woman unleashed#remember when bonhart attacks yennefer it is like a lion and a panther in the cell#geralt just unleashed the panther on them#they really should have had yennefer under stronger security like i guess vilgefortz’ misogyny really was the death of him#that is also kind of true because he dies because of geralt’s amulet from fringilla#so it was literally because of several women and a girl and also a vampire that he triumphs#you know when you put dandelion with a group of women it feels like a fox in a henhouse. even if said fox is stupid and gets kicked#however putting regis with a group of women is something like the angel that appeared to mary#the elbow-high diaries
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having read nearly all of the Jeeves short stories, it’s so funny to me that Bertie’s bisexuality manifests as casting a wide but shallow net at girls and a narrow but ridiculously deep net at men. He thinks girls are pretty on a reasonably frequent basis, and has tried to marry at least four women thus far (not counting the unwanted engagements), but when it doesn’t work out he’s over it in 24 hours. Meanwhile he shows absolutely no interest in and never gives flattering depictions of 99% of the men in his life, but will praise Jeeves to anyone who will listen, wax poetic about his appearance (and get defensive on his behalf about it when a child insults it), and is absolutely inconsolable when they are separated.
(also Bertie is in no way allosexual. he is canonically terrified at the thought of reproducing. and due to the narrow but deep net on the other end I don’t imagine he’s going around sleeping with loads of men, either. that man’s either demi as hell or just entirely ace)
#red randomness#jeeves and wooster#bertie wooster#reginald jeeves#wooves#jooster#100 and up neat#finally determined my take on Bertie orientation and had to get the thoughts out#granted I have only read the first three short story collections + Extricating Young Gussie (re: none of the novels or last two stories)#so I can’t speak for the few stories following that or any of the novels#but this is my StanceTM#curious to see what that pastiche Jeeves and the Wedding Bells is like and whether or not it matches this#because if it’s focused on a Bertie het romance then I have trouble seeing it#he truly doesn’t seem invested enough in women for it to carry a whole book???#they’re more like crushes or cheery whims#while Jeeves is so close to his heart that he can’t bear to be without him. a source of comfort as a person beyond just what the man does#side note there are two pastiches I’ve heard about that put Bertie with Bobbie Wickham and that sounds untenable lmao#Bertie would be at his wit’s end#also I heard she gets a guy later anyway?? and at this point Bertie’s already fallen out of love with her besides???#truly the greatest sin of those two pastiches is separating him from Jeeves though. good fucking luck#it also sounds like the show is kinda different?? but I’ve never seen it#anyway I’m rambling without all the information so maybe this is total nonsense but hey!
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All-f**ker
#gow odin#odin gow#odin god of war#god of war ragnarök#god of war#All-father#odin allfather#odin#Don't forget me all-fucker#Have you ever noticed that odin was married to two different women that were taller than him? Short man tall girl relationship.#He loves tall woman I guess but who's the dom who's the sub in the bedroom???
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Everyday i wake up and think abouthow sad i am that lestat the musical is objectively a horrible musical because i really do think interview with the vampire would probably make the best musical ever
#TO ME#interview with the vampire#iwtv#the vampire lestat#lestat the musical#okay but like litterally the structure of the story would be perfect for a musical#perfect two act structure#the interview framing device would work SO WELL#a play is also like the only place i think you can actually do book accurate armand#because its theater so you can just have short women and youngish theater twinks play him#claudia works WAY easier in a play for pretty much the same reason of suspension of disbelief being different#like in a play all that works so much easier#or like anne rice style oppulance and sensuality would work amazingly in a broadway style production#literally you cant tell me it doesnt also have the exact same audience as the longest running show on broadway phantom of the opera#JUST THINK ABOUT THE THEATER ACTORS PLAYING VAMPIRES PLAYING THEATER ACTORS PLAYING VAMPIRES#it would specifically be my favorite thing ever#i just think theater is actually the only place you can truly make annes vision come to life#god how i long for lestat de lioncourt to sing showtunes to me
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#beautiful#beautiful women#gorgeous#gorgeous women#stunning#stunner babe#crop top#blouse#mini skirt#short skirt#plaid skirt#blonde#brunette#two babes
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it's month 7 of pants research and this is the scene of the latest fashion cryptid sighting unsuspecting civilians were subjected to at the local charity shop this morning
#pants#fashion#men's fashion#cryptid#cryptidcore#da me#((the shop doesn't have a fitting room so I was measuring with my measuring tape instead to make sure it was the correct fit))#I bought FOUR pairs of pants for under 20 quid TOTAL!#(and two huge bed sheets worth of fabric for less than 10 cause this specific charity shop is my fave cause they got curtains & bed sheets)#and then 3 more at tkmaxx that did cost about 20-25 each but apparently that was like 50 quid less than rrp#and all 7 of them fit appropriately in the hip/crotch area and I'll only need to shorten the legs 🙏#cause I finally figured out what measurement to fit men's pants for the other week#cause unlike women's fashion which just fits to existing body shapes (eg waist for pant waist crotch for pant crotch etc)#men's fashion ignores basically all existing body shapes which makes it so much harder in so many ways#for someone this short I sure am crouching in public surprisingly often
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