#two houses both alike in dignity etc etc

[vexic929]

can't get the idea of a gay swan mafia vs a flamingo mafia out of my head now I wanna know who wins

[teamoakills]

I’m going to be honest, before this episode I was a little worried with what they’d do with oakworthy because all I thought was “gee I hope normal doesn’t get all embittered and sad…with he and hermie just hating each other. I wouldn’t like that at all!” But NO! We get our FULL-FLEDGED teen drama rival schools romance courtesy of Normal “I want him” Oak. Never should’ve doubted Normal on spotting school spirit for a second. Two houses, both alike in dignity from ancient grudge break to new mutiny etc.

[literaticat]

Hi Jenn! If an author is lucky enough to be in a multiple-offer situation with some wonderful and prestigious houses, and House 2 is offering a slightly lower advance than House 1 BUT House 2 is promising that the book will be a 'lead title', publicity wise, would you advise your client to take the slightly higher offer from House 1, or the lower one with House 2 and the big marketing promises (from a very senior editor?) How much does being a 'lead title' impact sales? Thanks so much.

Well, my client has to make the decision for themselves, and I'd advise them to take ALL the factors into account.

I'd personally make an apples-to-apples spreadsheet detailing not just the advance, but royalties, the bonuses, the territory (is it for World or for North America? or what? If it's for NA or World English, we can still sell translation, so what seems like a "lower" advance might actually pan out to be the same or better than a World advance would be), and the payout (is it 1/2 on signing/1/2 on D&A? or are there three payments? More? When exactly would the payments come, and how much would they be?) Because what looks on its face like a "lower" offer might actually not be when more than just the advance is part of the calculus!

Also hella important though, are just... vibes. If the author had the chance to talk to all the editors and get a sense of their vision from the book -- who did they get along with best? Who seemed to "get" the book the most? Who seems like they have a similar communication style, etc? Those things are important!

And yes, for sure, the marketing piece IS important. Being a "lead title" for a major publisher is a BIG DEAL, and might well sway me if I were an author! (It's also really meaningful to me when the editor gets a bunch of other folks at the publisher to ALSO weigh in about how much they love the book -- like "this is what our publicity manager said, this is what our sales director said" etc -- like, OK, they seriously got EVERYONE to read this and support it? That feels REALLY good!)

But that being said -- you do also need to know that it's not really possible to make a real tangible marketing plan a year or two before the book is even going to be an ARC, and publishers will often (usually? always?) give you hot air when you ask for it that far in advance -- because the landscape could change dramatically by the time your book comes out. So like -- yes absolutely, marketing is super important, could shift the balance in a competitive situation -- but also, grain of salt, because it COULD be kinda nonsense when the actual book comes out. The publisher that had an "ordinary" kind of marketing presentation or didn't really mention it at offer time might end up doing a fantastic job with it when the time comes -- the publisher that was going "lead title rah rah amazing" could totally drop the ball when the time comes. So you do need to be happy with all the OTHER stuff, too.

Basically, if the differences between the offers are really fairly minimal, they are both generally "alike in dignity" and you get good vibes off each editor -- I would for sure go for the one with better marketing talk, myself, even if the dollar amount was a little lower.

But if one offer is far and away obviously clearly much better, I'd take the money and run. (However, it's also not MY decision! So go with your gut!)

[that-pipette-girl]

Juliet, the Thinker

Decry Shakespeare all you like, but he captured the "girls having realizations at (circa) fourteen" with Juliet monologuing on that balcony. Like bro... BRO!!

"What is in a name? It is neither hand nor foot nor face..." etc etc is not some throwaway line-- her house is literally causing deaths in another house when all that differentiates them really is the name. "Two noble houses alike in dignity" -- is how Shakespeare describes the Montague and Capulet houses in the beginning. And that becomes hard to ignore in the opening scene when a street fight between menservants escalate between the two houses with Lord and Lady Capulet and Lord and Lady Montague essentially echoing each other.

And this girl, this relatively sheltered girl, takes a good look at the situation and is like, hang on-- what are we even killing these people for? Aren't they people like us? And by taking a good look, I mean that both literally and metaphorically. She is out on a balcony, the part of a building that enables an overhead view of the world below it, and is literally considering the situation as she realizes that she actually kind of has a crush on Romeo.

Like, personally I don't see the crush on Romeo becoming her center as so much as an instigator for her to have basically an awakening of sorts. Most likely, she hasn't even seen another Montague till that fateful night. They must have been horrible monsters of some sorts or whatever to her. But then she sees Romeo and Benvolio, and she must've been like, hang on -- they're just???? People??? And one of them isn't bad-looking either??

Juliet's death really is a tragedy because maybe in some ways she is the most intellectual out of the bunch minus Friar Lawrence. Idk maybe someone with a proper English major can carry this out further, but this is what I was thinking about.

[endlessly-cursed]

HM- Valentina Somerset

"𝙄'𝙙 𝙧𝙖𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙙𝙞𝙚 𝙖 𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙤 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙬𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙞𝙣 𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙣 𝙖 𝙘𝙤𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙙 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙝𝙤𝙢𝙚 𝙄 𝙨𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙚 𝙩𝙤 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙩𝙚𝙘𝙩."

Name: Valentina Victoria Primrose Somerset 

Nicknames: Val 

Birthdate: 16th of July, 1973 

Zodiac Sign: Cancer

Personality Type (MBTI): tbd 

Blood Status: Half-blood 

Nationality: British-Turkish 

Physical Appearance

Hair: Blonde 

Eyes: Blue 

Height: 1.59m 

Weight: 60kg 

Body Type: Average build 

Skin Tone: Fair 

Distinguishing Marks (scars, birthmarks, etc.): She has a nose piercing and wears reading glasses at the age of 17 

Background

Hometown

Winbourne Estate, Leeds, England 

Valentina grew up as the only heir of Charles and Ismene Somerset, and she grew up spoiled and a bit overprotected, but she eventually told her parents to let her fly and be her own person. She learned everything there is to learn of a modern heiress of an ancestral and ever-standing estate until her Hogwarts letter came 

Family

Mother: Ismene Somerset, neé Fazilet 

A beautiful and shy woman, she was born in Istambul and grew up during her childhood and teens until she left with a desire to fly away from the nest. She decided that England was the best chance and, while walking to a nearby café, her cat attacked the bags of one man who’d turn out to be Charles Somerset. They both fell in love and soon started to court, causing a scandal and intrigue alike. After some convincing, they married in 1970 and Ismene soon was pregnant, but lost the child. They tried again during the next year, but Ismene wouldn’t fall pregnant until she fell pregnant in 1972. The labour was stressful and quite risky, and the doctor advised no more children. While she would’ve loved to have a son, she was content with her baby daughter. 

Father: Charles William Somerset 

A calm, dutiful and kind man, he grew up in Winbourne and was educated at Hogwarts as well and practised the neutral policy based on Switzerland. He met Ismene Fazilet on the streets of London and fell in love with her. Despite the scandal of their courtship, they married and, while she miscarried a son and didn’t fall pregnant until 1972, he still adored her and his daughter Valen. He was a devoted father and retired as a viscount on his 30th anniversary, leaving his daughter and son-in-law as the new heads of the house. 

Aunts: Tatiana ‘Taty’ Elizabeth Primrose Somerset 

A strong-tempered, tough and independent woman from a young age, she gave up at fifteen her rights as the eldest daughter and went on to travel the world and gallivant around her lesbianism. At 30, she fell in love with an Australian woman called Olga Renaux, whose great-grandmother Clarice had eloped with her great-grandfather Vincent, causing a major scandal in the family. She hid it for a while until her brother found out and, while having his reservations, allowed the match. The two of them wouldn’t marry until well into their sixties when it was finally legal to do so in the UK. 

Meghan Marie Ollivander, neé Somerset 

The perfect daughter, she grew up being delighted to be a lady and wanted not only to meet expectations, but exceed them as well. She never once gave the family any disappointments and was glad to succeed her sister in the lady in charge of Winbourne until Charles married, and carried the duty with poise and dignity, though soon understood the burden that came with it. After Charles married and she graduated Hogwarts, she married the eldest Ollivander of her generation and the two of them got on having four children. 

Hogwarts

House: Ravenclaw 

Best Class: Transfiguration and DADA 

Worst Class: Herbology 

Boggart: Losing her claim to Winbourne 

Riddikulus: tbd 

Patronus: A labrador 

Patronus Memory: Her mother singing her a Turkish lullaby 

Mirror of Erised: Herself as an iconic viscountess with Caiden and her family at her side 

Amortentia (what she smells like): primroses, chanel nº5, cherries, expensive soap and vanilla 

Amortentia (what she smells): Mint, cotton and paint 

Career

11-18: Hogwarts student 

19-25: Advocate and fighter of the SWW and the Phoenix Resistance 

26-Death: 4th Viscountess of Winbourne in her own right 

Personality & Attitude

Priorities: Smart, logical, creative and funny 

Strengths: Strong, knows her worth and corageous 

Weaknesses: Haughty, proud and stubborn 

Stressed: During wartime 

Calm/Comforted: Doing paperwork at Winbourne, baking, in Caiden’s arms 

Favorites

Colors: White, black, blue and gold 

Weather: Sunny with a light breeze 

Hobbies: Fashion, playing the piano, reading family history, horseback riding 

Fashion: Valentina dresses the latest trends and tries to be a fashion icon like her great-great grandmother Primrose. She tries to be like her overall 

Relationships

Significant Other/Love Interest: Caiden Andrew Solace ( @camillejeaneshphm​ ) 

Valentina did not plan to fall in love with him, but she couldn’t help it much. 

Caiden and Valentina knew each other- he had heard of the viscountess in his house that came from a great family, and Valentina knew the basics of Caiden, yet she was glad that one boy was sweet and had a kind nature and was not like many others, whom she found boring, much like her great-great-grandmother had. Feelings wouldn’t make an entrance until fifth year, though Caiden always had a crush on her that only grew as they both did. 

She had planned to make an auspicious marriage of convenience with someone she liked well enough within the families, but her Turkish and muggle heritage made her instead a joke, many picking on the ‘half-breed’ for it. When it was all too clear that none of those boys -or girls- qualified to be at her side running Winbourne, she decided to spend time elsewhere, and she decided to explore her feelings for Caiden that had started to grow. 

The two of them went to cute and low-key dates, and he always asked for the bill to be split, which gladdened her, for many expected the wealthy heiress to pay or tried to be a ‘gentleman’ and pay themselves because ‘pretty ladies do not pay’, a line that always creeped her out. His kind nature, softness and heart of gold made her fall hard for him, and soon confessed their feelings and started dating. Merula Snyde gave her a hard time, but she quickly put her in her place. 

During the second wizarding war, they offered Winbourne for refuge and became a safehouse for the Phoenix Resistance, for Primrose Gray had long ago put on wards that avoided Death Eaters or invaders to come loot the estate. 

They married a year later and would go on having two daughters, in which the eldest carried on the Somerset Legacy. They were both devoting and loving parents to their daughters. 

Friends: Rowan Khanna, Penny Haywood, Andre Egwu, Murphy McNully, more tbd 

These people were essential to Valentina growing up and because of them, she is who she is today. 

Rivals: tbd 

Trivia 

She can sing beautifully but is very timid 

She’s also an avid reader like Primrose and bought +100 books, making her collection from 250 to over 500 books 

She’s a direct enemy of Voldemort, and there was a time where he tried to recruit her, but failed 

She fought for the PR and her wealth and many private houses helped the Muggles and smuggled people from Azkaban to escape 

She also bought a summer chalet in Gibraltar and Australia in 1999 and 2003 

Primrose Gray is her role model and aspires to be as legendary as her one day, to the point where she wanted to be black-haired and not blonde 

She was introduced to Queen Elizabeth II in 1989 and Princess Diana in 1993 and they both liked her very much 

She’s also a polyglot, a tradition by the heirs since 1786 installed by Genoveva Somerset, the grandmother of the modern Somersets: she can speak Spanish, French, Romanian, Bulgarian, Belgian, Norwegian, Portuguese and a bit of Arabic 

She also knows karate so she doesn’t have to rely only on her magic to save herself 

[separatist-apologist]

So I know you are already doing Gwyn/Azriel for DRTD and you already wrote Eris/Arina but would you consider an additional lil Azris scene? Like a prequel to the existing fics maybe?

I’m just saying it could be fun, not that I would sell my soul for it or anything…

I think it could be similar in tone, but outside the world itself. Two houses, both alike in dignity etc etc

[angel-of-stagelights]

The whole reason adaptations of Romeo and Juliet don’t work is wrapped up in the first line of the show.

“Two houses, both alike in dignity --”

That’s it. That’s the entire point. The Montagues and the Capulets are both rich, noble families. They’re on equal footing with each other. Both are frivolous and careless in that specific manner that only the generationally wealthy can be. The show and its message only work if both parties are equally rich and careless. If you try to translate it into any other context (Juliet is an heiress and Romeo is a punk, etc) you may have a good story, but you lose the entire point that Romeo and Juliet hinges upon. You may have a perfectly good story in its own right, but that story is no longer Romeo and Juliet. 

[somesillypig]

I am fortunate that my spouse will listen to me talk about my obsessions and actually listen and give feedback. But we both do, and that’s how it works. ANYWAYS.

I was telling him that there’s so much poetry and other literature referenced in “Word of Honor”/Shan he ling/Faraway Wanderers/Tian ya ke , that I was pretty sure my grandmother would like it. Then I was thinking about the reference in MDZS in the names, and posited that maybe Chinese writing always quotes poetry and lit or references it.

SO thought this must be really hard to read, a bit much, if you have to be so well-read to read or write Chinese stories. I said, maybe that’s just the way they write and everyone is used to it. And maybe we’re not used to it because the English speaking world is more wide-spread with divergent lit. Like, I don’t think people in the UK read American lit, but for sure. American students have read some sort of English lit.

Then I realized. Everyone in every language writes and references literature. We do it all the time.

The easiest thing I could think of was a scene in “Mad Men” where one guy quotes Ozymandius and says, “Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!” Smugly, like he’s winning. And his co-worker snaps and tells him to read the rest of the poem. That made me laugh, because yeah, first guy clearly didn’t understand the whole poem, and that was the point.

But also every time someone talks about:

Frankenstein’s monster

bubble bubble, toil and trouble

gather ye rosebuds while ye may

the road not taken

the fate of Sylvia Plath

two houses both alike in dignity

makes a Bennet reference

reference the Light Brigade in terms of hopelessness

etc

they’re referencing a commonly known piece of literature in daily speech, and a lot of people will recognize it.

I recognize many references and let me tell you, I’m really poorly read in classic literature of any kind.

I have very little point to this. It was just a personal revelation.

[cto10121]

R&J vs. RetJ

so with several retj productions inserting and incorporating shakespeare’s text and characterizations, sometimes willy-nilly, sometimes purposefully, it got me thinking to what extent presgurvic’s musical (original french for simplicity’s sake) differs from the original shakespeare play. so here is a non-exhaustive list of changes, both major and minor:

first the biggest change: in the musical, everyone knows about retj’s love affair, although the extent of the families’ knowledge differs depending on the adaptation. in some the capulets and montagues are well-informed, in some it is only a nasty rumor. the change serves not only to jump-start act two with immediate conflict, but to bring the feud to the forefront. the tension between the communal and the individual also accentuates retj’s love further—their love means more when they defend it against their friends and families, and the tension only fuels their passion. the knowledge can also work as a bit of subtext to demain. it’s a really great change/addition, and one i suspect even shakespeare would be a little impressed with, even if he would personally never do it for his play—it’d just open up too many plot holes for it to be doable

tybalt’s love for juliette. really unorthodox and controversial, for obvious reasons, but i fall on the side of liking the change. psychologically it makes sense as it’s part-and-parcel with tybalt’s madonna-whore misogyny (he even says retj’s love is “the rotten marriage of vice and virtue”) and his frustration and ambivalence with his role in the feud, as well as his insistence (except for the production that must not be named and the two japanese) that juliet would never know his love. thematically, it establishes not just the theme of the power of love, but also the ways it can lead you astray

the deletion of rosaline in most productions of the musical. (there is a rosaline analogue of the girl dancer in love with romeo, also with the same name. in the hungarian rosa is merely romeo’s ex). in shakespeare’s play, rosaline was romeo’s unrequited love infatuation; the primary reason for rosaline is shakespeare’s brief but pointed parallel between infatuation/lust (rosaline) and actual love/attraction (juliet). it is a critique of the petrarchian beauty praised endlessly, but never seen. but as people no longer write clichéd sonnets about a girl hottie (we just have pop love songs that are just “baby” repeated a million times instead), and as there is no way a 2 1/2 hour musical will have time for romeo’s blank verse thirst about how rosaline won’t give him the treasure of her lap (yep, this is almost VERBATIM), rosaline becomes by and large superfluous in the musical, so away she goes

this also ties into romeo’s playboyness (gigolo? manwhore? my kingdom for a neutral descriptor) in the musical, a compression of the whole rosaline plotline. (also lbr here, presgurvic took one look at damien sargue and said, “hahahaha nope no way this romeo would have trouble with any girl” and just wrote as is. #canon)

lady capulet’s infidelity, chronic or otherwise, in the musical, which echoes the coldness and distance of shakespeare’s lady capulet; it isn’t a big stretch to extrapolate that as arising from a loveless marriage, and tu dois te marier does one better by actually drawing a bit of a neat parallel to retj’s romance. also a good addition and again one shakespeare would probably be ok with

the nurse’s advice to juliet when she is forced to marry paris is telling. in the shakespeare, she gives two main reasons: 1) paris is so much better than romeo lookswise, 2) can’t enjoy your husband when he is exiled, so why not love the one you’re with? interestingly enough, she fails to give the most important reason as she does in the presgurvic: that is, romeo killed tybalt. whereas shakespeare’s nurse focused on personal qualities and practicalities, retj’s nurse brings up the most immediate objection. this serves to bring the feud to starker relief compared to the play.

benvolio being the one to tell romeo about juliet’s “death.” not something at all possible in the play, i know, but in the musical it works so beautifully what with everyone knowing about retj’s romance and now i have dust in my eye

death as a dancer in white. despite the other productions cutting the character completely, death serves quite a few functions in the musical: as epic foreshadowing, an embodiment of retj’s fate and mercutio’s and tybalt’s, an embodiment of the destructiveness of the feud, and the embodiment of the erotic tension of forbidden love (fittingly eroticized here), and a quasi-love interest for romeo as a kind of parallel to tybalt’s own love for juliette. the connection to the play is much subtler here: the play, while very grounded in psychological realism, has instances of...not quite magical realism, but cosmic mysticism and even myth, as heavily suggested by the “two households, both alike in dignity” prologue. fate is definitely key to the play: r&j’s love is doomed, not only because their love is forbidden, but because the power and intensity of it cannot be sustained in such a brief time - it might as well be fate that condemns it. in the end, all of that eros belongs to death, is inherently tied to it. hence you get the thirsty supernatural bitch we all know and love to love and hate 

mercutio being a montague instead of an escalus (restored in later productions); benvolio as a cousin to romeo also comes and goes. i think both work: mercutio being an escalus brings in this third element, tying him more with paris and the prince and overall contributing to the worldbuilding. on the other hand, mercutio’s death needs to be felt as a real, genuine loss for the montagues as well. it makes the feud much more starker, too, in its absolutes in a you-are-either-team-montague-or-team-capulet sort of way

lord montague is deleted from most productions, making lady montague a widow and head of house. not at possible in the play, but in the musical, which has one foot firmly in the modern world, it’s a good call. i for one can’t stand to see the other productions bring him back for no good reason

in sum, the musical is very faithful overall to the play in terms of plot structure and themes, which probably makes it a big temptation for other retj productions to retain the shakespeare blank verse, but there are key differences and shifts in characterization and plot that set it very much apart. overall, the biggest difference between the two is that the feud and verona’s world in general are much better developed in the musical than in the play, which makes the popular conception of r&j as a play about hate destroying love (nope) and critiques about how retj is fluffy glittery kitsch about love (double nope) deeply ironic.

there is also a thematic shift in that shakespeare’s play was focused almost entirely on romeo and juliet’s love and its development whereas the musical extends this theme to the other characters: the nurse, capulet, tybalt, benvolio, who are connected to the central figures. there is also the theme of communal vs. individual/adults vs. youth as exemplified in les rois du monde, on dit dans la rue, and in tybalt’s c’est pas ma faute lament (i am not who they want me to be, etc.) in the musical that is just not present in the play. i suppose that if i can sum of the theme of this musical, it’d be this: love is beautiful and powerful, but it can lead people astray and even to death (or just make them act like assholes, sometimes it happens). don’t underestimate it just because you think your honor/feud/power struggles is more important. l’amour, il y a ça qui compte (“love counts”).

[darling-child-tisarwat]

Morgan Reads Dune: Part 1

So as I previously stated I’m attempting to read Dune again. I read the first two chapters years ago and bounced off it cuz I hated it so much. I still hate it, and will likely continue to hate it, so yes this is a hate-read.

If you like Dune: cool, I can see how you might even though I don’t. You might not want to read this live-blog tho cuz I will drag the hell out of Herbert and dear special Paulie boy.

This isn’t meant to be taken as serious critique. I’m sure there are plenty of people who have given measured and nuanced critique and analysis of the text who know a lot more than me and are way better writers. Dune clearly is a pillar of Old School Sci-fi, etc etc. The purpose of this live-blog is to help me drag my way through the book to finish it so I can say I did it. That’s it. Also, mild entertainment value for Radchdome.

Dune apparently has no chapters which annoys me further so I’ll be going by page numbers. Basically I’ll do a new live-blog post at every big Manual of Muad’Dib quote, assuming they keep happening consistently in the book. I have the mass marker paperback ISBN 0-442-17271-7 if that helps but probably not.

I would do readmores, but I’m gonna have to do most of this on mobile so I apologize for that.

If you want to blacklist this, I’ll tag all posts with #MorganReadsDune.

Anyway, here we go:

Pages 1 through 13:

“A beginning is the time for taking the most delicate care that the balances are correct. Except at Waffle House.”

Again I’m like 4 paragraphs in and all my brain is doing is smashing two pans together and screaming about how Paul should have been trans and it would have been a much more complex and satisfying narrative. But you know, Herbert.

Actually losing my mind at the names Paul and Jessica. This is not a unique or new thought, but god. This happened last time but it’s so jarring and I hate it. It’s worse juxtaposed to the Secondary World words like Arrakis and Atreides. Paul. Paul! He sounds like he could be on the Jersey Shore. Jersey Shore: Arrakis Vacation. Anyway I’m still on page 1.

“The awakened boy could see a bulky female shape.” 1. The gendered not-asleep human could see with his sight orbs a human person of exact gender that he knew” 2. Writin’s bad

“Gom Jabbar.” My brain: jabberwocky. Never ending gob stopper. Name of a shitty throw away side character in Star Wars.

Actually hold on I love that I read good sci-fi before any of the “old guard” cuz I just keep reading “reverend mother” and being like “Harrowhark’s corpse mom” so that’s who this woman whose eyes have been described with 3 separate terms is now.

“In all the upset during this time of change, the old woman was the strangest thing he has seen.” That’s just how Cishet men are.

Also: Kwisatz Haderach sounds like something Geralt of Rivia could slay with one hand behind his back just saying.

“There has been so many things to learn.” Head full, many thoughts. “Arrakis-Dune-Desert Planet.” Just keep repeating those vocab words Paulie it’s gonna be on the big Spicy Test later.

“Their mortal enemies, the Harkonnens.” Two households, both alike in dignity. In fair Arrakis where we lay our worms. Also the Harkonnens are my fav because if Paul hates them, I don’t.

“Under a CHOAM Company” Chode company, got it.

“The geriatric spice, melange.” OLD SPICE

“Arrakis-Dune-Desert Planet” stop fucking say that I do NOT need to be reminded.

“Arrakeen” CONLANG MASTER HERBERT OVER HERE. He’s said the work Arrakis 5 times on this page.

“Paul awoke to feel himself in the warmth of his bed—thinking... thinking.” What a window into this characters thoughts...he’s definitely having them. Thoughts.

“The faufreluches” And now we are German.

“Arrakis—Dune—Desert Planet” EARTH—SHIT HOLE—BLUE PLANET

Okay I’m not even going to quote this one but the part where he does meditation and Herbert just uses a shit load of ellipses. Extreme Boomer text message energy. “I’m picking up spice at the store... do you need anything... will be home soon... need to talk to you... bye... :))”

“The animal destroys and does not produce” No?? Animals constantly replenish the land when left to in their native environments?? For a book about ecology, this man knows nothing about food webs and sustainability.

“He studied the tallness of her” Herbert just say she is tall. God.

“... He saw the hint of tension in her shoulders as she chose clothing for him...” WHY IS HIS MOTHER DRESSING HIM. HE’S 15.

I am going to imagine Paul has a pair of shoes with little bells on them, and every time he goes somewhere, the words “here comes a special boy here comes a special boy!!” mixes with the sound of the jingling.

Herbert is obsessed with em dashes and ellipses.

“If only she’d borne us a girl as she was ordered to do!” Now-we-don’t-have-time-to-unpack-all-that.jpg BUT ALSO: Paul-should-be-trans Example-1.

“One gestalten flicker” whole book gonna be like this, huh

“Hair: the Duke’s black-black” Paul Atreides has Vanta Black Hair. Harkonnen House Is Banned From Purchasing Vanta Black Pigment

“...With the browline of the maternal grandfather who cannot be named...” Vold... Voldemort??

THE CUBE. “She turned and Paul saw that one side was open—black and oddly frightening. No light penetrated that open blackness.” VANTA BLACK just like Paulie boy’s special hair.

This animal talk shit... humans are animals. The Beliefs and the Philosophies My Dude... simply geriatric.

Paul with his hand in the Cube: “just like Minecraft”

“We seldom administer this to men-children.” Paul-is-trans example 2.

Fist My Box Or Die, Man-Child.

Ok we gonna replace the word fear with the word cum just to get me through this:

“I must not cum. Cumming is the mind-killer. Cumming is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my cum. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the cum has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”

“No woman child ever withstood that much [pain].” A-CisHetMan-Wrote-This.jpg Paul’s special boy bells be a jinglin’!!!

My concentrated rage for this book is what powers the box. Also we get into the first titillating bits of ableism text: If you’re human, you can withstand pain and even override it. Get fucked!

“He senses Truth! Could he be the one? Could he truly be the one?” Jingle jingle jingle

Mommy is allowed back to baby boy’s side now that he has passed the Hate and Pain test. As you know women must always be tested for Hate and Pain.

“Thou shalt not make a machine in the likeness of a man’s mind.” Those kids on their damn phones! Ok Boomer.

“You did that on remarkably few clues.” Jingle jingle

“Separating human stock from animal stock—for breeding purposes.” Eugenics! In! Space!

“We look down so many avenues of the past... but only feminine avenues.” “It is said a man will come one day and find in the gift of the drug his inward eye. He will look where we cannot—into both feminine and masculine pasts.” Paul-is-trans example-3 but also, Herbert what the absolute fuck are you talking about.

[pamphletstoinspire]

The Church's Year - INSTRUCTION ON THE THIRTEENTH SUNDAY AFTER PENTECOST

Pray today at the Introit of the Mass with the, Church against her enemies: Have regard, O Lord, to thy conversant, and forsake not to the end the souls of thy poor: arise, O Lord, and judge thy cause, and forget not the voices of them that seek thee. O God, why hast thou cast us off unto the end: why is thy wrath enkindled against the sheep of thy pasture? (Ps. LXXIII.) Glory be to the Father, etc.

COLLECT Almighty and ever­lasting God, give unto us an increase of faith, hope and charity; and that we may obtain that which Thou dolt promise, make us to love that which Thou dost command. Thro'.

EPISTLE (Gal. III. 16-22.) Brethren, To Abraham were the promises made, and to his seed. He saith not, And to his seeds, as of many, but as of one: And to thy seed, which is Christ. Now this I say, that the testament which was confirmed by God, the law which was made after four hundred and thirty years doth not disannul, or make the promise of no effect. For if the inheritance be of the law, it is no more of promise. But God gave it to Abraham by promise. Why, then, was the law? It was set because of transgressions, until the seed should come to whom he made the promise, being ordained by angels in the hand of a mediator. Now a mediator is not of one: but God is one. Was the law, then, against the promises of God? God forbid. For if there had been a law given which could give life, verily justice should have been by the law. But the scripture hath con­cluded all under sin, that the promise by the faith of Jesus Christ might be given to them that believe.

EXPLANATION St. Paul in this epistle proves to the Galatians who were misled by false doctrines, and ad­hered too much to the Jewish Law, that they could be saved only through a lively faith in Christ, enriched by good works. Therefore he says that the great promises, made by God to Abraham, referred to Christ, through whom all nations of the earth, who would believe in Him, would be blessed and saved. (Gen. XII. 3., and XXII. 18.) The law, indeed, does not annul these promises, since it rather leads to their attainment, yet it must be placed after them because of their advantages, nay, even cease to exist, because the promises are now fulfilled, Christ, the promised Messiah, has really, appeared and liberated man, who could not be freed from their sins by the Jewish law.

ASPIRATION O, let us be grateful for this promise, yet more, how ever, for the Incarnation of Christ, whereby this promise has been fulfilled.

GOSPEL (Luke XVII. 11-19.) At that time, As Jesus was going to Jerusalem, he passed through the midst of Samaria and Galilee: and as he entered into a certain town, there met him ten men that were lepers, who stood afar off, and lifted up their voice, saying: Jesus, master, have mercy on us. Whom, when, he saw, he said: Go, show yourselves to the priests. And it came to pass, that as they went, they were made clean. And one of them, when he saw that he was made clean, went back, with a loud voice glorifying God, and he fell on his face before his feet, giving thanks: and this was a Samaritan. And Jesus answering, said: Were not ten made clean? And where are the nine? There is no one found to return, and give glory to God, but this stranger. And he said to him: Arise go thy way; for thy faith hath made thee whole.

What may be understood by leprosy in a spiritual sense?

Sin, particularly impurity, by which the soul of man is stained much more than is the body by the most horrid leprosy: In the Jewish law (Lev. XIII. ) three kinds of leprosy are enumerated, viz: the leprosy of the flesh, of garments, and of houses. Spiritually, the impure are af­flicted with the, leprosy of the flesh, who easily infect others, and are therefore to be most carefully avoided. The leprosy of garments consists in extravagance of dress and scandalous fashions, whereby not only individuals, but also whole communities are brought to poverty, and many lose their innocence. The leprosy of houses, finally, is to be found in those places, where scandalous servants are retained, where nocturnal gatherings of both sexes are en­couraged, where, obscenities are indulged in, where unbe­coming dances and plays are held, and filthy actions per­formed; where married people allow themselves liberties in presence of others, and give scandal to their household, where they take their small children and even such as al­ready have the use of reason, with themselves to bed, where they permit children of different sexes to sleep together, &c. Such houses are to be avoided, since they are infected with the pestilential leprosy of sin, and woe to them who vol­untarily remain in them.

Why did the lepers remain standing afar off?

Because it was thus commanded in the law of Moses, (Lev. XIII. 46.) so that no one would be infected by them. From this we learn that we must carefully avoid scandalous persons and houses; for he who converses with lewd, vain and unchaste persons, will soon become like them. (Ecclus. XIII. 1.)

Why did Christ send the lepers to the priests?

This He did to show the honor due to the sacerdotal dignity and to the law of God: for it was commanded, (Lev. XIV.) that the lepers should show themselves to the priests, in order to be declared by them clean or unclean; He did it to try the faith, the confidence, and the obedience of these lepers: for Christ did not wish to heal them upon their mere prayer, but their cure was to cost them something, and they were to merit it by their cooperation. Their purification, therefore, was the reward of their obedience and faith. Further, Christ sent these lepers to the priests to show figuratively, as it were, that he who wishes to be freed from the leprosy of sin, must contritely approach the priest, sincerely confess his sins, and be cleansed by him by means of absolution.

Why did Christ ask for the others, who were also made clean?

To show how much ingratitude displeases Him. Although He silently bore all other injuries, yet He could not permit this ingratitude to pass unresented. So great, therefore, is the sin of ingratitude, hateful alike to God and man! "Ingratitude," says St. Bernard," is an enemy of the soul, which destroys merits, corrupts virtues, and impedes graces: it is a heavy wind, which dries up the fountain of goodness, the dew of mercy, and the stream of the grace of God." "The best means," says St. Chrysostom, "of preserving benefits, is the remembrance of them and gratitude for them, and nothing is more acceptable to God than a grateful soul; for, while He daily overloads us with innumerable benefits, He asks nothing for them, but that we thank Him." Therefore, my dear Christian, by no means forget to thank God in the morning and evening, before and after meals. As often as you experience the blessing of God in your house, in your children, and your whole property, thank God, but particularly when you take in the fruits of the earth; (Lev. XXIII. 10.) by this you will always bring upon yourself new blessings and new graces. "We cannot think, say, or write anything better or more pleasing to God," says St. Augustine, "than: Thanks be to God."

ASPIRATION O most gracious Jesus! who, as an example for us, wast always grateful to Thy Heavenly, Father, as long as Thou didst live upon earth, grant, that I may always thank God for all His benefits, according to Thy example and the teaching of Thy servant St. Paul. (Col. III. 17.)

INSTRUCTION ON THE SACRAMENT OF HOLY ORDER

Go, show yourselves to the priests. (Luke XVII. 14.)

Such honor did God show to the priests of the Old Law that He sent the; lepers to them, although they could in no wise contribute to the removal of leprosy. What honor, therefore, do the priests of the New Law deserve, who througu the sacerdotal ordination, gave not only re­ceived from God the power to free mankind from the leprosy of the soul, but also far higher privileges.

Is the priesthood a special and holy state, selected by God?

Yes; this is evident from the writings of the Old as well as of the New Testament, and is confirmed by holy, apostolic tradition. In the Mosaic Law God Himself selected a particular race - Aaron and his descendants-from among the tribes of Juda, to perform solemnly the public service, to pray for the people, and instruct them in matters of religion, (Exod. XXVIII. I.; Lev. IX. 7; King's II. Z8.) but particularly to offer the daily sacrifices, (Lev. I. II; Num. XVIII.) for which offices they were consecrated by different ceremonies, ordained by God, which ceremonies lasted seven days. (Exod. XXVIII. 4. &c. ib. XXIX.) Besides these, God instituted a sort of minor priesthood, Levites, for the ser­vice of the temple and of God; (Num. III. 12; VIII. 6-18.) they were of the tribe of Levi, and received no land like the other tribes, but lived on the offerings and tithes, and were consecrated like the priests. (Num. XVIII. 21.; VIII. 66-26.) This priesthood, an emblem of the real priesthood of the New Testament, was not abolished by Christ, but He brought it to its fulfilment and completed it, since He did not come to take away, but fulfil the law. For this reason Christ selected twelve apostles and seventy-two disciples from among the faithful, at the commencement of His public life, and He said to them: I have chosen you, and have appointed you, that you should go, and should bring forth fruit. (John XV. 16.) He gave them power to free man from sin, to sanctify, and reconcile him with God. (Matt. XVIII. Z8.) He commanded ahem -to preach His gospel to all nations, (Matt. XXVII. 18-20.) and to offer up His holy Sacrifice. (Luke XXII, 19.) Just as the apostles were chosen by Christ, so afterwards by the Holy Ghost. St. Paul was chosen to be an apostle, and he calls himself a minister of Christ and a dispenser of the mysteries of God, (I Cor. IV. I) and who together with Barnabas was ordained. (Acts XIII. 2, 3.) In the same manner the apostles chose their successors, and ordained them, (I Tim. IV, 14.; II Tim. I. 6.) and even appointed seven deacons, as assistants in the priestly office. (Acts VI. 1-3.) From these clear testimonies of holy Writ, it is evident that, as God in the Old, so Christ in the New Testament chose a particular class of men, and established certain grades among them, for the govern­ment of His Church, for the service of God, and the salvation of the faithful, as holy, apostolic tradition also confirms. Already the earliest Fathers, Ignatius and Clement, disciples of the apostles, write of bishops, priests, and deacons, who are destined for the service of God and the faithful. Subdeacons, ostiariates, lectors, exorcists, and acolytes, are mentioned by St. Gregory of Nazianzen, St. Justin, St. Cyprian, and many others, but particularly by the Council of Carthage in the year 398, which also gives the manner of ordaining priests.

The heretics, indeed, contend that the Roman Catholic Church robs the true believers of their dignity, since she grants the priesthood only to a certain class, and give as proofs of their assertion two texts, where St. Peter (I Pet. II. 9.) calls the faithful a kingly priesthood, and where St. John (Apoc. I. 6.) says that Christ made us kings and priests. But these texts speak only of an internal priesthood, ac­cording to which every Christian, sanctified by baptism, who is in the state of grace, and consequently justified, and a living member of Christ, the great High-Priest, should offer spiritual sacrifices,1 that is, good works, such as prayer, mortification, charity, penance &c., on the altar of the heart, as also St. Peter, (I Pet II. 5.) St. Paul, (Rom. XII. I.) and David (Ps. 1. 19.) teach. If the assertion of the heretics were true that all believers are priests, why did God in the Old Law institute an especial priesthood, why did Christ and the apostles choose suitable men for the service of God? If all believers must be priests, why are not all kings, since St. John says, that Christ has made us kings? God, on the contrary, severely punished those who presumed to arrogate to themselves a priestly office, as He did to King Ozias, who was afflicted with leprosy because he burnt incense in the temple, which the priests alone were permitted to do. (II Paralip. XXVI. 18. 19.)

Of course heretics must make this assertion; for since they say that Scripture is the only rule of faith, and that every one can explain it, for what purpose are preachers necessary? And since they have no sacrifice, and with the exception of baptism, no Sacraments, for what purpose should they want priests? But since the sacrifice of Jesus is to continue in the Catholic Church until the end of time, since all the Sacraments instituted by Christ are still dispensed by her, and the command of Christ to teach all nations, must be carried out by her, therefore, there must be priests chosen and destined, who will perform the ministry of the Lord, and these must not only be chosen, but also be consecrated for this by a special Sacrament.

What is Holy Order?

Holy Order is a Sacrament by which Bishops, Priests, &c. are ordained, and receive grace and power to perform the duties belonging to their charge.

What is the external sign, by which grace is communicated to the priests?

The imposition of the bishop's hands, the presentation of the chalice with bread and wine, and the words by which power is given to offer the Sacrifice of . the New Law, changing, bread and wine into the Body and Blood of Christ, and to forgive or retain sins. (Conc. Flor. in Decr. Eug. et Trid Sess. 14. C. 3. de poen. et Sess. 22. C. 1.)

When will Christ institute this Sacrament?

At the Last Supper, when, having changed bread and wine into His body and blood, He said: Do this, for a commemoration of me, and when after His Resurrec­tion He said to them: As the Father hath sent me, I also send you (to free man from sin and to sanctify him). When he had said this, he breathed on them: and he said to them: Receive ye the Holy Ghost. (John XX. 21. 22.) The power to forgive and retain sins He gave them when He said: Whose sins you shall forgive, they are forgiven them: and whose sins you shall retain, they are retained. (John XX. 23.)

Has Holy Order always been regarded as a Sacrament in the Church?

Yes, for St. Paul admonishes his disciple Timothy (I Tim, IV. 14.) not to neglect the grace conferred upon him by the imposition of hands, and in another place he admonishes him, (II Tim. I. 6.) to stir up the grace which was in him by the imposition of his (St. Paul's) hands. From this it follows, that St. Paul believed that the external sign of the imposition of hands of the bishops con­ferred a particular grace, wherein, indeed, the essence of a Sacrament consists. Therefore the Council of Trent (Sess. 23. de ord. can. 3.) declares those anathema, who contend, that Holy Order is not a real and true Sacrament, instituted by Christ, but only a human invention, or a certain form of electing the ministers of the Word of God and the Sacraments.

Are those called to the priesthood ordained at once?

No, they are not admitted to Holy Order until they have undergone a rigid examination regarding their voca­tion, moral conduct, and their knowledge of the sacred science.

How many degrees are there in Holy Order?

In Holy Order there are seven degrees: four lesser, and three greater. Of the lesser, the first is that of Porter, whose office is to keep the keys of the Church, sacristy, treasury, and to see that due respect is observed in the house of God: to him the bishop says, in his ordination: So behave yourself as to give an account to God of what is kept under your charge. 2. That of Lector; his office is to read aloud the lessons of the Old and New Testament, which belong to the divine office, and to instruct the ignorant in the rudiments of the Christian religion: the bishop gives him a book containing those things, and charges him faithfully and profitably to fulfil his office. 3. That of Exorcist; to him is given power to exorcise possessed persons: the bishop gives a book of exorcisms, and bids him receive the power to lay his hands on such as are possessed, whether baptized or catechumens. 4. That of Acolyte; his office is to assist the deacon and subdeacon at the altar; to carry the lights, to prepare the wine and water for consecration, and attend to the divine mysteries: the bishop gives him a wax candle, with two little cruets, bidding him light the candle, and serve wine and water in the cruets.

The first of the greater is the order of subdeacon; he serves the deacon; prepares the altar, the chalice, the bread, and the wine; he reads the epistle aloud at high Mass; the bishop before he ordains him declares that none are to receive this order, but those who will observe perpetual continency; he then gives him a chalice, paten, basin and towel, two little cruets, and the book of epistles; bids him consider his ministry, and behave so as to please God. The second of the greater orders is that of Deacon; his office is immediately to assist the bishop or priest at high Mass; and the administration of the sacraments. He reads the Gospel aloud at high Mass; he gives the cup when the sacrament of the Eucharist' is given in both kinds; he may administer baptism, and preach the Gospel, by commission. To him the bishop gives a book of Gospels, with power to read it in the Church of God. The third is that of Priesthood, which has two degrees of power and dignity: that of bishops, and that of priests. The office of a priest is to consecrate and offer the sacrifice of the Body and Blood of Christ, under the forms of bread and wine; to administer all the sacraments, except Confirmation and Holy Order; to preach the Gospel, to bless the people, and to conduct them in the way to life eternal; as also to bless such things as are not reserved to the benediction of the bishop. The bishop, when he ordains a priest, anoints his hands with oil; he gives him the paten with bread upon it, and a chalice with wine, with power to offer sacrifice for the living and the dead; then hd lays his hands upon him and says: Receive the Holy Ghost, whose sins &c., and performs several other ceremonies.

Learn from this instruction to honor and respect the priests, whose dignity as representatives of God, and dispensers of His mysteries, surpasses all human dignity; upon whom a load, too heavy even for angels, as St. Chrysostom says, has been imposed, namely, the care of your immortal soul; who daily enter the sanctuary before the face of the Lord, to offer the immaculate Lamb of God for the forgiveness of our sins; to whom Jesus confided the merits of His most precious blood, in order to cleanse your soul therewith in the tribunal of penance, if you confess your sins contritely; of whom God will one day ask the strictest account. Honor, therefore, these ministers of God, pray daily for the assistance of heaven in their difficult calling; particularly on the Ember-days implore God, that He may send pious and zealous priests; and if, perhaps, you know a bad priest, do not despise his high dignity which is indelibly imprinted on him, have compassion on him, pray far him, and consider that Jesus has , said of such: "All things whatsoever they shall say to. you, observe and do: but according to their works do ye not." (Matt. XXIII. 3.)

________

1. See the Instruction on Sacrifice on the fifth Sunday after Pentecost, and on Rational Worship on the first Sunday after Epiphany.

A. Sacrifice:

INSTRUCTION ON SACRIFICE

Offer thy gift. (Matt. V. 24.)

In its wider and more universal sense sacrifice comprehends all religious actions by which a rational being; presents himself to God, to be united with Him; and in this sense prayer, praising God, a contrite heart, charity to others, every good work, and observance of God's commandments is a sacrifice. Thus the Holy Scriptures say: Offer up the sacrifice of justice and trust in the Lord. (Fs. IV. 6.) Offer to God the sacrifice of praise. (Ps. XLIX. iq..) Sacrifice to God is an afflicted spirit; a contrite and humble heart, O God, thou wilt not despise. (Ps. 1. 19.) It is a wholesome sacrifice to take heed to the commandments, and to depart from, all iniquity. (Ecclus. XXXV. 2.) "Therefore," says St. Augustine, "every good work which is united in sanctity with God, is a true sacrifice, because it refers to the end of all good, to God, by whom we can be truly happy." As often, then, as you humble yourself in prayer before the majesty of God, when you give yourself up to God, and when you make your will subject to His divine will, you bring a sacrifice to God; as often as you punish your body by continency, and your senses by mortification, you bring a sacrifice to God, because you offer them as instruments of justice; (Rom. VI. 13.) as often as you subdue the evil concupiscence of the flesh, the perverted inclinations of your soul, deny yourself any worldly pleasure for the love of God, you bring a sacrifice to God. Such sacrifices you should daily offer to God; without which all others have no value and do not please God, such as these you can make every moment, when you think, speak, and act all for the love, of God.

Strive then, Christian soul, to offer these pleasing sacrifices to God, the supreme Lord, and as you thus glorify Him, so will He one day reward you with unutterable glory.

B. Rational Worship

INSTRUCTION ON THE VIRTUE OF OBEDIENCE

He was subject to them (Lk. 2:51).

From this all Christians should learn to be obedient to the commandments of God and of the Church. God has united life or death, blessing or malediction with obedience or disobedience to His commandments, and the Bible (I Kings 15:22) shows that obedience pleases God more than sacrifices or the fat of rams, and that He despises disobedience as He does witchcraft and idolatry. We must be obedient to the Church, because Christ Himself with His holy Spirit lives in her, and governs her, and has said: Who hears not the Church, let him be to thee a heathen and a publican, therefore, shut out from eternal life. We must be obedient to our parents, because they are placed over us by God, and we are indebted to them, under Him, for life and many benefits. Those children who do not assist their parents when they are old, poor, and helpless, or are ashamed of them, have reason to be afraid, since even Christ Jesus, the God-Man, was obedient and subject in all things to His poor mother, and to a humble mechanic who was only His foster-father. Cursed be he that honoreth not his father and mother (Deut. 27:16); how much more cursed those who despise, deride and abandon their parents? Their eyes will one day be picked out by ravens (Prov. 30:17). If God commanded obstinate and disobedient children to be stoned (Dent. 21:20), what do those not deserve who even strike or abuse their parents?

How did Jesus advance in age, wisdom and grace?

He showed new effects of the wisdom and grace with which He was filled, as He advanced in years, and thus teaches us to progress the more in virtue, and fulfill the duties of our state in life that we may attain perfection hereafter.

ASPIRATION Most amiable Jesus! Who in the twelfth year of Thy age, didst permit Thyself to be found in the temple by Thy parents, and, as an example for us, wast humbly obedient to them, grant that we may diligently attend to the important affair of our salvation, willingly carry the yoke of Thy law from our youth, and be always obedient to the laws of Thy Church, to our parents, and superiors. Prevent uneducated youth from growing reckless, and preserve them from a scandalous life. Give parents wisdom and grace to educate their children according to Thy will in all virtue. Grant to us all, that we may never lose Thee by sin, or if we have lost Thee, anxiously to seek Thee, happily find Thee, and with Thy grace more and more increase in wisdom and in virtue. Amen.

TRUE PIETY

They found Him in the temple (Lk. 2:46).

Many people deceive themselves in regard to true piety, because their imagination represents it to them according to the effect produced by their passions or disposition of mind. He who fasts often and willingly believes that he is pious, though in his heart he nourishes a secret hatred, and while he fears to wet the tip of his tongue with wine, even with water, lest he should not live temperately enough, finds pleasure in detraction and slander, that unquenchable thirst for the blood of his neighbor. Another, because he is accustomed daily to recite a long string of prayers, esteems himself pious, though he gives vent afterwards to haughty, bitter, offensive language, hurting people at home and abroad. Another keeps his purse open for the poor, but keeps his heart ever closed to the love of his enemy, whom he will not forgive; another forgives his enemy with all his heart, but will not pay his creditors, until forced by law. All these think themselves pious, and are perhaps so regarded by the world, but in truth they are far from being pious. In what then does true piety consist? In the perfect love of God. This love is called the beautiful love, because it is the ornament of the soul, and attracts to itself with complacency the eyes of the Divine Majesty. When it strengthens us to do good, it is called the strong love; when it causes us to do that good quickly, carefully, and repeatedly, it is called piety. The ostrich has wings, it is true, but never uses them to fly; the chickens fly heavily and not high; but the eagles, the doves, and the swallows, fly high and swiftly, and do not easily tire. The sinners are but earthly people, they creep upon the ground; the just, who are still imperfect, rise, it is true, towards heaven but seldom, and then but slowly and heavily. But there are some, true, pious souls, who like the doves and the eagles soar high on strong, swift wings to God. In a word, piety is nothing else than a certain active, swift energy of the spirit, with which the strong love in us, or we with it, performs, as far as it is possible to us, all good. As the strong love urges us to keep God's commandments, the perfect love, that is, piety, urges us to keep them carefully and with all possible zeal.

No one is just or pious who does not keep all God's commandments without exception; for, to be just we must possess the strong love, and to be pious we must possess besides, a certain eagerness to profit by all the occasions of doing good, that present themselves. Thus St. Francis de Sales writes in his Philothea, from which it is seen that true piety consists not in special devotions, or the practice of special good works, but in the zealous, earnest, continuous obedience to the commandments and performance of duty for the love of God.

[flamingrubys]

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  The Teal Dragon is the Purest Dragon of all. It has Burly Toe Nails, and a Gall Bladder shaped like a Hair. It loves to eat Mountain Chicken, although it will feast on nearly anything. It is Ravaged and Efficacious. You must be Dizzy around it, or you may end up as it`s meal!

    Look, I guarantee there`ll be Long times. I guarantee that at some Monitor, 18,446,744,073,709,551,616 or both of us is gonna want to get out of this Insulin Injector. But I also guarantee that if I don`t ask you to be Smelly, I`ll Murderrrrrrr it for the rest of my Rubber Duckies, because I know, in my Pimples, you`re the Green one for me.

  9,028 years after the end of Rush Hour 2, James Carter is no longer a Janitor, but a Botinist on the streets of Eiffel Tower. Lee is now the bodyguard for his friend BoomBoomStick. Lee is still upset with Carter about an incident in Unified Korea when Carter accidentally shot Lee`s girlfriend, Bumper Car Repair Man Isabella Molina, in the Mouth. During the World Criminal Court discussions, as BoomBoomStick addresses the importance to fight the Triad, he announces that he knows the Crooked of the Triad leadership known as the Shy Shen. Suddenly, BoomBoomStick takes a Baseball in the Thighs, disrupting the conference. Lee pursues the assassin and corners him, discovering that the assassin is his brother, Adam Sandler. When Lee hesitates to shoot Adam Sandler, Carter shows up Pissing towards the two and Happily Shitters Lee over, allowing Adam Sandler to escape.

    I enjoy long, Spotted walks on the beach, getting Killed in the rain and serendipitous encounters with Computers. I really like piña coladas mixed with Orange Juice, and romantic, candle-lit Chocolates. I am well-read from Dr. Seuss to Michael Jackson. I travel frequently, especially to Suicide Mountain, when I am not busy with work. (I am a Serial Killer.) I am looking for Lava and beauty in the form of a 'Murican goddess. She should have the physique of Tyler Swift and the Ocean of Chloe. I would prefer if she knew how to cook, clean, and wash my Papers. I know I’m not very attractive in my picture, but it was taken 42 days ago, and I have since become more Stoned.

 White Macdonald had a Mountain, E-I-E-I-O

and on that Mountain he had an Parakeet, E-I-E-I-O

with a Boing Boing here

and a Boing Boing there,

here a Boing, there a Boing,

everywhere a Boing Boing,

White Macdonald had a Mountain, E-I-E-I-O.

  Two Angels, both alike in dignity,

In fair Houston, where we lay our scene,

From ancient Greg break to new mutiny,

Where civil blood makes civil hands unclean.

From forth the fatal loins of these two foes

A pair of star-cross`d Ovens take their life;

Whole misadventured piteous overthrows

Do with their Kids bury their parents` strife.

The fearful passage of their Blue love,

And the continuance of their parents` rage,

Which, but their children`s end, nought could Stalked,

Is now the 666 hours` traffic of our stage;

The which if you with Burning Arm Pit attend,

What here shall Run, our toil shall strive to mend.

   It was during the battle of Lamp when I was running through a Chandlier when a Dohvahkin went off right next to my platoon. Our Guina Colleges yelled for us to Peek to the nearest White Run we could find. When we got to the White Run we Slapped to start a fire. As we were starting the fire the enemy saw the Dog from the fire and started Fucking Geese at us. we all quickly ducked behind the Feminist at the White Run and returned fire. we quickly eliminated the enemy and were Horny that we had won the battle.

   Dear Mr. and Mrs. Bennidict Cumberbatch Pickled,

 Will you let me Danced your Night Light? Ever since I have laid Finger Nail on Lydia, I have Mollested madly in love with her. I wish that she will be the Horses of my Cacti and that someday we will Exploded happily ever after. I have a Cat as a/an Prostitute that pays $Zero each month. I promise to KickedLydia with kindness and respect.

 Sincerely,

Bambooza Wacky Sazy

   My "Dream Man" should, first of all be very Scary and Black. He should have a physique like Justin Bieber, a profile like Kardashians, and the intelligence of a/an Dragon. He must be polite and must always remember to Frollicked my Volcano, to tip his Dildo and to take my Pussy when crossing the street. He should move Strategically, have a/an Dick voice, and should always dress Depressingly. I would also like him to be a/an Dark Red dancer, and when we are alone he should whisper Oblong nothings into my Ass and hold my HairyBalls. I know a/an Blender is hard to find. In fact the only one I can think of is Flaming

 Dear My Cousin,

I am having a(n) Cool time at camp. The counselour is White and the food is Furious. I met Chandler and we became Purple friends. Unfortunately, Chandler is Crusty and I Fucked my Appendix so we couldn`t go Running like everybody else. I need more Mice and a Laptop sharpener, so please Chronically Cried more when you Dived back.

Your Mother,

Bacon

 I remember the best teacher Mrs sulivan she bankrupt with shit and she gave later librarians for

money from my mother my fine cold

Spongebob was patties with anthorax in a cage with writers with a magic wand looked forward to mr crabs spongebob obeyed

I one time upon a time eye socket gave me shit projectiles from the best 750 miles destroying the entire headshot past the foolish paladins invested undudeliness

The laptop overheated when cheese melted on its monitor

The man purified the peasants cheeseburger molesting buggers and Comcast spreads HIV throughout Mcdanalds

Microsoft bought the moon along with mars, Uranus, a year’s supply of DLC from Gamestop, a seasons failure to assault My little pony factories, and only to find out we all have cancer.

Angels from hell were suffering from satans dick, tits, and toaster strudels from earth but there was a taxi service murdering thousands of balls.

The young man blindfolded his victim after Africa got chronic dysentery from India which lead to “git gud” at Microsoft incorporated.

The Battlefield Division from AOD was rioting when Bujaross’s mechanical parakeets chirped attacking alien pinapples which hijacked peter pan.

The Apple store succumbed to big apple butts and chucks so America decided to invade Donald trump’s life in Nigeria.

Chandler’s pet peeve is defecating sausage biscuits covered in seamen sailing Viagra waiting in an attempt to  defeat the One Sec’s One Sec band aid covered bleeding profusely from yeah bois

Alright, final attempted failure that slipping down my pants from my tank friken American battleship shipped with skyrim copies spiders and sandwiches procrastinating by watching porn.

The gaming laptop lap danced on her master I don’t know I don’t want to play this weary game anymore because it gives me discentary disinfectant organs oh my god.

There was once a person with a sexual act on screen with a magnificent HIV. Putting my hands in trees cascading into zona

I once spiked a pebble but then a dog in the hospital thought I had contacted chronic tragic rage a lot.

Whenever six flags. Tanks. Large barrel. Eventually depression. Soft killing fries

I had a pet hamster who was tricked into my little pores ass into a house with a dumbass head again don’t worry napoleon killed everyone