#twink death isn't a thing

[nostroviadrop]

Do not kill the part of you that is twink,

Kill the part of you that twinks

[utopianparadoxist]

Who's Retconning?

So the update's pretty exciting! Happy 4/13, it was a real good one. I'm very excited that Jake and Jane are on the Meat ship now, mainly because A) Jane being there means that permadeath is less likely for everyone, including Dirk and B) Jake is Dirk's biggest weakness and I want him to fuck that twink up.

That said, I've noticed the most popular understanding of this update seems to be that Vriska's doing retcons. I can understand why, she's certainly involved and doing a lot, but I disagree. I think what we're dealing with here is Vriska collaborating with Jasprose...and also June, who is the one doing the actual retconning.

Let's do a little bit of visual analysis of the imagery in this update so I can explain why.

First things first, let's consider the power we've been shown Vriska has gained here. Her ascension seems to have enabled her to travel through space at the speed of light, or even faster somehow--fast enough to escape the boundary of the black hole that divides Candy from Meat-- achieving the impossible, since not even Light can escape a black hole-- and then cutting through who knows how much Space to get to Deltritus practically instantly.

But there's a problem there. As fast as she is, Vriska is still depicted as traveling. She is moving in a trayectory across space and time.

If Vriska could retcon, doing this wouldn't be necessary for her at all. She could simply warp instantly from one location to another, like John warping into the Masterpiece. He doesn't *come into* the Masterpiece from anywhere--he's not there one moment, and in the next moment, he is. It cuts out the idea of travel entirely.

If Vriska is trying to get to Deltritus as efficiently as possible, and it sure doesn't look like she's wasting any time, then it doesn't really seem like John style retcons are an option for her.

The other thing that people are pointing to as a Retcon is Vriska burning John's farewell letters to his friends, with some even assuming this means she's retconning his death entirely from the beginning. I find this unlikely, because it would change Terezi's character arc and motivations considerably and a lot of weight has been put on the corpse in her wallet modus.

But honestly, it doesn't even look like she retconned the letters. It just looks like she outright destroyed them. There's still fire and scorch marks where they were laying--there's still a mark that they existed. Reducing something to ash isn't the same as making it like it never existed at all.

I think there's an alternate possibility, too. If the hellfire is a new manifestation of Light specific to Vriska, then she could have stolen the letters through Light instead. At the moment, most of Meat's cast doesn't even seem to know what happened to John.

What would happen if Vriska put John's letters, now abandoned completely since not even Jane and Jake are on Earth C to pick them up otherwise, in all their hands? It seems like a good way to get everyone organized and motivated to help John.

And Vriska probably isn't thinking about the Candy timeline folks, but what if John's letter to Jade reached Candy Jade, for example? There could be a lot of narrative utility and emotional catharsis in a beat like that. So I think it's likelier she just took them than that they're retconned out of existence.

Now don't get me wrong--Vriska definitely did something to the Meat crew. She's the one causing that turbulence, after all, and whatever she's doing definitely involves her powers. But her powers are also very, very visually distinct, in a way that conflicts with the idea that she's the one who put Jake and Jane on the Meat ship.

Because the narrative goes out of its way to show us this panel of Jasprose, and the wisp of blue depicted here looks nothing like the dark blue lasers and hellfire that Vriska manifests.

Instead, it looks very distinctly like a wisp of air, J00N's breathy blue.

As if June was just standing in front of her, and whisked out of the scene with Jane and Jake in tow, leaving her alone in Midnight City.

This is as Jasprose expected, of course. In her 666 conversation with Davepeta, Jasprose outright says that she's made progress improving Jane's politics, and that while Jake is still heartbroken over Dirk, she's confident she can bring out his latent heroism before "curtain call"--in other words, before it's time to take the stage where it's relevant.

Jasprose told us this was going to happen ages ago. She's been preparing Jane and Jake for it this whole time. So Catnapped's arc hasn't been retconned--it's simply been concluded, and this panel is signaling to us that Jane and Jake have just left her neck of the woods and departed for the Meat Ship plot.

So again--if Vriska's responsible, then why not her standard blue light and hellfire here? Why this wispy, breathy blue instead? If that's just meant to be smoke from her pipe, then why the breathy blue at all? Wouldn't a noir-ish grey make more sense?

Here's something to consider: We've already seen June Egbert exists at some point in the future. Whether she's a revived Meat John or a Candy John that has broken out of the black hole, as the most fully realized version of herself, she will almost certainly reclaim her Retcon power anyway.

To be honest, it's such a unique and character specific ability that I'd be pretty surprised if Vriska just happened to get it through helltier too. It just seems like a strange ability to give to multiple characters, though I suppose its not impossible. What it would be, though, is a little redundant.

If June exists and has retcon *ever*, even far in the plot's future from our perspective, then she can by definition go back in time to fuck with the plot at any time, in any place, retroactively. We may not have seen June directly yet, but it makes perfect sense that her touch would be felt:

She is already here.

Lastly, consider that if this Jake & Jane retcon on the Meat Ship is a product of Vriska, June and Jasprose collaborating to bring about a tactical timeline change, that paints a much stronger picture than if its just Vriska dominating the plot and taking charge of everything herself as is her traditional route.

It would speak to an increased ability to engage in genuine teamwork and coordination with equals on Vriska's part. I like that better for this new phase of Vriskaing. After all, she's normal now. She doesn't have to do everything by herself.

[daveth-isnt-dead]

Tentatively

Summary:

You don’t want to tell him the truth, that most of your friends have grown up and don’t talk to you anymore, that while you love your family it’s too difficult to find time to travel and see them, that you are incredibly lonely.

Contains: Fem Reader, Death Mention (but only as much as you would expect given the source material) Word Count: 2,235 Read on AO3

You still feel strange a few hours after leaving the chatroom. Grim, who despite all evidence to the contrary, is actually the Grim Reaper, left pretty abruptly after telling you there is something incredibly wrong with your soul and you are unsure if you should be concerned or offended about the whole thing. 

After a disappointing meal of microwaved leftovers and an attempt at enjoying a relaxing bath despite your apartment’s abysmal water temperature, you find yourself laying back on your bed and staring up at the all too uninteresting ceiling as you wait for your hair to dry. The window above your desk is open and the cool breeze is pleasant, but you’re already getting the sense that you will have trouble getting to sleep tonight, despite Grim’s uncharacteristic insistence that you get some rest after today. 

There’s something so lonely about these summer nights, lonely enough that you find yourself scrolling through your contacts list, looking for someone ( anyone ) to talk to. Calling your parents this late will only make them worry, and all of your friends from uni have much better sleep schedules than you do and will already be out cold. You toss your phone onto the vacant pillow beside you and let out a sigh, that really only leaves one option. 

Hoisting yourself from the bed, you walk over to the desk and grab your laptop. Quickly tapping open the chatroom app and turning off your camera before hitting the call button. You push your lamp and pot-plant out of the way to leave room for the laptop on your bedside table and lay back down as you wait for an answer. 

You spend the first seven rings worrying that he won't pick up, by the eighth you are proven wrong.

“I thought I already told you to go to sleep.” He says in lieu of a greeting. 

All the lethargic energy in the room suddenly dissipates, and your mouth tugs up in a smile, “Hello to you too”

“I was being serious.”

“Yeah, but you aren’t my boss.” He huffs, “I am your reaper.” “Oh?” You reply, smirking to yourself, “ My reaper, are you? Just mine?” “No! I- I’m just assigned to you. That does not mean-”

You laugh, “Sorry, sorry. I’m just teasing, thank you for picking up, I mean it.” It’s quiet, but you swear that you hear a sharp intake of breath on the other end of the call, “I- well, I just wanted to be certain that you were not suffering any side effects from the soul connection.” He clears his throat, “You…aren’t…are you?”

“I’m having trouble sleeping, but I don’t think I can blame that on you. I suppose I feel a little jittery? But that makes sense given my emotional state right now.” “What is it?” “What’s what?” “Your uh- your emotional state.”

“Oh.” You say, feeling your heart beating a rapid tattoo behind your ribs, “Well, I dunno. I’m a little overwhelmed, I suppose. I really just thought you were an edgy cosplayer, and I mean, you still are but you are also literally the Grim Reaper, so I’m still just dealing with that I guess.”

“That is perfectly normal, then. Though you should have been feeling frightened the moment I contacted you, your reaction was quite delayed.” “Hey! I never said ‘frightened’ I said overwhelmed! That’s a completely different emotion.”

He chuckles, “Unable to stop thinking about me, then?” “That also isn't what I said.” Though, he isn’t entirely wrong, “I’m just worried about how I'm going to focus at work tomorrow when I’ll be spending the whole day looking over my shoulder to make sure some white-haired twink isn't about to commit murder upon me.” 

“White-haired what? ” “Twinnnnk~” You reply, “Look it up, I’m sure that will keep you busy for a few hours.” “I hardly need to be kept busy , I have important work to do.” “Like stealing my soul.” “Yours and others, I do not just follow you around all day.” He says dryly, “You are not that important. Also, I will not be murdering you. I am pushing you in the correct direction, one you have stubbornly been avoiding for far too long.” You hum quietly to yourself, reaching out to pat your cat where he sits next to you on the bed, “How was I meant to die anyway? Just out of curiosity, since you seem to know everything about it.” He doesn't answer for some time, and the deafening silence makes you regret even posing the question. 

“Do you really want to know?” He finally asks, “Most people never find out, because unlike you they die when they are supposed to.” “Hit me with it, Grimmy.” He groans, “Do not call me that.” then you hear him sigh, deeply, contemplatively, “You were supposed to die of food poisoning.” “Oh.” You reply, feeling your heart sink a little, “Damn, that sucks. That’s so…boring”

“Death often is.” “I guess, well, I guess I was hoping that the way I die might be interesting at least. What food would have poisoned me anyway?” “Ham sandwich.” “Yikes. Was the ham poisoned or something?” “No, just expired. On a related note, you do need to clean out your fridge more often.” He’s right. Your fridge is pretty nasty, and it kind of always has been. It’s a very low priority on your list of tasks.

“Grim?”

“Yes?”

You swallow, unsure how to phrase the real question hiding in the recesses of your mind, “could you…I dunno, kill me gently, if it comes to it? I mean, I just-“ you roll over onto your side, making eye contact with the black screen of your laptop, “If I have to die, I don’t want it to hurt.”

There’s silence for a moment, and then he replies, “I don’t want it to hurt you either.”

“That’s…sweet, Thank you.” “Lacking desire to see you suffer does not make me sweet , it makes me considerate .” He sighs irritably, “More importantly, does this mean you’re finally willing to hand over your soul?” You laugh, “ No! I just- I dunno, I had a weird day and I'm feeling kinda existential now.” You look through your window, staring up at the night sky, “Do you feel that way sometimes, or is it just a human thing?”

“I do not see how that’s any of your business.” “C’mon, Grim. Just play along for once, get silly with it.” You hear him huff on the other end of the line, you can picture the exact pouty face he must be making right now, “I have been a reaper as long as I can remember, and will continue to be one for the rest of my life, there is little for me to be existential about.”

“Hm.” 

“What?” He says brusquely, “What are you ‘hm-ing’ about?”

“The thought of having one job for the rest of my life is exactly the sort of thing that makes me existential, that’s all.” “Well you don’t have to work at the same job for the rest of your life, so what exactly are you complaining about?” “I mean, the rest of my life might only be a few more days.” You say, “Provided you win our bet of course, which you will not be doing.” “Do not doubt me, Sunshine. You may come to regret it.” You giggle, “Doubtful.” There’s a rustling sound on the other end of the call, you can only assume that he is also lying in bed right now, “I am quite literally death, and I even gave you concrete proof of this fact this evening.” his voice turns quiet, dare you think it, wistful, “Why aren’t you afraid of me?” You shrug, even though he can’t see you, “You aren’t very scary.”

“I am going to take your soul .” “You are going to try and take my soul.” a smile tugs at the corners of your mouth, “And even if you do, you’ve already promised to do it gently .” “I promised not to hurt you, I never said anything about being gentle .” 

“I’m sorry, I just don’t see the difference between those two statements.” He groans, and when he speaks again his voice is muffled. You suspect he has his face buried in a pillow, “You are infuriating. When I leave the chatroom for the evening I assume that I am done with you, I was not prepared for you to insist on continuing our conversation well into the night.”

“What, are you tired?” All goes quiet for a moment, and then, “No. Are you?” “Nope.” “Hmph, you should be at this hour, especially after a day of work.”

“I- well, I dunno…”

You don’t want to tell him the truth, that most of your friends have grown up and don’t talk to you anymore, that while you love your family it’s too difficult to find time to travel and see them, that you are incredibly lonely. You are tired, you have to be up at 5:00 to get ready for work tomorrow morning, but the idea of saying goodbye, of hanging up, makes something ache deep inside you. Something inside the very soul he wants to steal. 

“You don’t know, what?”

“Huh?” Grim huffs again, “You said, ‘i dunno’ and then stopped talking, which is very out of character for you, by the way.” “Oh? Did you miss me? Were even those brief seconds of silence enough to make you realize how much you love hearing my voice?” “I will hang up.” 

“Don’t.” You say before you have time to think better of it, “Please.”

“I-“ he clears his throat, “Only if you can act normally for the rest of our conversation.”

“I’m plenty normal, you’re the weird one.”

“What’s weird, how am I weird?”

You roll onto your back, staring up at the celing, “Oh i dunno, just the whole ‘I am death incarnate! I have come for your soul! I will connect my soul to yours! ’ schtik” 

“You know fully well that it is not a…what did you call it? A schtik?” He pronounces the word completely wrong, “Whatever that is, it is not one of those. I am death incarnate, I am here for you soul, and you were literally an active part in the soul connection.”

“Oh, about that soul connection thing, by the way.” He scoffs, “Your ability to change the subject at a whim is still strong as ever i see.” 

“I know, I’m very talented- anyway! I wanted to ask if you can do anything cool now that we have a soul link or whatever.” “I have already told you, I cannot control your body. As entertaining as it would be to embarrass you publicly, even my exceptional abilities could not do that” 

“Oh kay , how about something easier, then?” You feel the warmth of your cat as he snuggles up against your side and instinctively reach out to pat him, “Read my mind, go on!” “I cannot do that.” “C’mon, Grimmy, give it a go!” You squeeze your eyes shut, “I’m thinking about something real hard right now.” He sighs, “Are you thinking about your cat?” “ Whaaaat? How did you know?!”

“I didn’t know , i guessed. I can’t read your mind, but i am still attuned with your soul.” His voice has turned uncharacteristically soft, he’s almost whispering, “It… flutters …when you are happy, and your cat makes you happy. So I guessed…”

“So you’re a soul reader, then?” You ask, trying to ignore the fact that your stomach also feels oddly fluttery right now.

“That is not a thing. You’re just making things up now.”

“Try again.” You say, your mind unwittingly flooded with thoughts of soft white hair and judgemental red eyes. Of hands you wish were bare, of sharp toothed smiles. Your heart slows to a languid rhythm, and something you aren’t ready to put a name to curls warmly in your belly. You close your eyes, softly this time, and breathe, “What am i thinking about now?”

He goes silent for a long time, you can hear the slow, even draw of his breath. You can picture him laying back on his bed, hair splayed over the pillow, brow creased in concentration and you wonder if he is thinking about you too. After what feels like an age, he finally answers, “your…plant?”

You burst into laughter and any tension in the air shatters, “My plant?! What about my soul was screaming plant just then?”

“Well, I don’t know! It was just happy again, happier, even and I assumed that you were smart enough not to just think about your cat again.” 

“Yeah, you got me.” You lie, “it was my cat again.”

“Hells, every single day you find a new way to get under my skin.” He sighs, and despite his earlier statement, his next words come out almost fondly , “You need sleep, mortal.”

“Yeah.” You reply, feeling that ache tug at you again, “I probably do.”

“I will talk to you tomorrow, that is, if you survive until then.”

That gets a laugh out of you, and you can’t tell if that was his intention or if he was being completely serious, “I look forward to it. Remember to murder me nicely, Grim.”

“As nicely as I can, I swear.” You can hear his smile, “Goodnight, Sunshine.”

[respectthepetty]

The Heart Killers' Colors? - Ep. 5

I'm traveling this week for very American Christmas reasons (i.e., football), but thankfully I'm a thot, so when I, in perfect health, look at my travel buddies and tell them I have a headache while rubbing my throat, they don't question where I disappear to for two to three hours, so here I am using my slutty excuse that only can be used once on this trip to watch my little gay show in peace!

And it was worth it just so I could see Pepper Keen tell JJ Thanon that he'll punish him later!

Keen better stop making heart eyes at Thanon on company time though because I don't think this will simply be an HR violation. No! Mother knows best, and her best is MURDER! She'll kill all these boys right where they sit as she is truly the only thing between these two who balance each other out (in white and black!).

I'm also glad I used my be-a-thot-to-get-out-of-group-activities pass on this show because Style was looking delicious trying to fight his good sense and his attraction to Fadel.

But I've been in love with this Black Brooder since the pilot trailer, and I too have slept with criminals, so I'd keep screwing this man if I was Style. Just like me, Style might not be the smartest, but he also isn't stupid!

Unlike his best friend!

This twink is going to be the death of him.

In multiple ways. (God, all these men are so beautiful!)

But Kant did do one smart thing and that was avoiding the camera outside of Bison's house by using a foam block to jump the gate, even though he didn't think about the very real chance there was a camera in the hidden room.

Which is why I NEED to know what Kant's true color is!

I'm still in the Kant-is-yellow-or-green corner like his spa key, but the people behind this show said he was dark blue like his cup.

And regardless of what Bison says, he is a Red Rascal, so either his favorite color is blue, and he turns red when needed,

Or he is picking up on Kant's true color and just playing the part of a docile boy as I suspect.

Bison noticed Babe's bruises, realized their female target would be more into Fadel, and knew James was following him, so unlike Kant who only noticed the exterior camera, Bison is far more observant of people and inner workings.

Every time Kant sees Bison's red side, he looks terrified, and we know he didn't actually date this Red Rascal, but only slept with him.

So I think Bison is attempting to tone down himself and his color by appearing blue.

He cares about this alleged (dark) Blue Boy.

Which is why I think he is trying to be what he thinks Kant would be interested in.

But the red is always there.

It's always around Bison, which is why I feel confident that he is a Red Rascal no matter what he wants to be.

And I think Kant is actually into it because red is always somewhere near him.

He smiled while looking at his phone when texting Bison and his shirts always have red on them, but, once again, red is also always around him in small ways!

So since he knows Bison's real color (because he does know he is a hitman), does he love him despite it?

I think he does and that these two besties are in the same swan-shaped love boat with their oddly colored couples' shirts.

Because it's clear that this (light) Blue Boy is in love with a criminal Black Brooder.

Not only did he explicitly state that he has feelings for this Black Brooder to his best friend,

But he also stepped into his true blue color this episode.

Blue Boys are loyal. They are trustworthy and provide a sense of safety, security, and calmness. So regardless of the circumstances, these two are actually in love since they are already exchanging colors.

Fadel told Style he wasn't that deep yet and he could get over Style easily, but Blue Boy Style already has Black Brooder Fadel baring parts of himself that he has had covered and buried for years. I stated Style was all flesh before, and I appreciate that the boy who doesn't mind being nude is the one to strip Fadel and expose his secrets.

Because just like his best friend, Style now knows exactly who Fadel is, yet unlike his friend who struggles with finding himself liking Bison despite Bison being a killer, Style seems to like Fadel MORE because he is the only one who finally gets to see what Fadel hides from everyone else.

So the tiny fact that their softest and most intimate moments happened at Style's place, an auto repair shop, the place where he restores beings by getting under the hood and repairing the broken parts isn't lost on me. Style wanted Kant's classic car, but he is realizing Fadel is the real classic. Style just doesn't want to get Fadel's engine revving; he wants to treat him the way a classic should be cared for.

Because a mechanic knows a classic never goes out of style.

[supercap2319]

"Looks like you two are finally on the same page." Rio said, a little pep in her step as she walked towards Agatha, Billy, and Y/N. So I'll let you decide. One of you stays with me. The other two walk free. Gee. I wonder who's it going to be." Rio moved her finger around in a teasing fashion until it landed on Billy.

"No." Y/N stood in front of Billy, casting a protective arm in front of him. "You can't take him. He doesn't belong with you."

"Rio laughed. A loud and sharp cackle before she looks serious at Y/N. "Honey, eventually, everyone belongs to me. Even the precious Scarlet Witch can't escape me. I am the natural order of things, and that little twink with the floppy ears has violated my rules."

"He just wanted to find his brother. His death was premature. Surely, you can understand that."

"You really want to sacrifice yourself for someone you just met, Y/N? I may not be a divination witch like Lilla...RIP, but I do know your end isn't supposed to come a long time from now. Don't ruin all the good you could do." Rio said.

Y/N flings his arm out and sends Rio flying across the yard until she hits the house. "You want him? Come get him, bitch."

[panilagidna]

One of the things that really bothers me about Abel's character is his age. According to biblical canon, Abel isn't much younger than Adam (relatively), which would put him at 7,000+ years old. But aside from his design drop in the Christmas trailer, which doesn't quite fit that description (hello, Saint Peter), we've had a lot of his behavior from the showers. And while the former can be justified by the vagueness of his death, the latter, well....

!Spoiler alert!

Abel literally acts like a boy drummer in a school boy band, nothing more. Bro doesn't even know the name of the weapon used by exorcists. How were they even going to make him Adam's successor?

This wouldn't be a problem if he was at least Charlie's age or something like that. But he's 7,000 years old and he asks his general if he can take HIS LATE FATHER'S guitar IN HIS NEW OFFICE.

Not to mention that when paired with Emily (the youngest seraphim, I don't think she's over a thousand years old) and Saint Peter, who's about 2,000 years old (if the real Saint Peter ever existed, and this one isn't the hyped mascot that Lute called him in court), Abel doesn't even seem like an older comrade, but an equal. Knowing that people are swiping him with both of them, it feels a bit... strange?

And if we stick to this theory, why is Adam the first human soul in Paradise? Isn't that why they made him an archangel (or partly for that)? Because Abel, by all accounts, is no different in strength or knowledge from the typical victor.

(Screenshot stolen from Twitter)

The funny thing is that I can totally understand both sides here. On the one hand: Abel in the series is a stupid chubby twink who literally gives off the vibes of a choir boy from a Catholic church (let me beat you up for this joke in the comments), who you can't give more than 20 by a stretch. On the other hand, according to the probable logic of the series, he's already like 7 thousand stupid chubby twinks and the stubble would be quite justified.

And the funny thing is that I'm 100% convinced that this issue will either not be raised at all in season 2, or it will be something minor that will break the lore even more.

If this post gets around, I'll make a second part where I'll analyze Abel's design a little more, try to come up with a stupid theory that would explain both his hair color and the correspondence of his age to his behavior and Adam's dislike for him.

[rootspiral]

Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 1 part 3

(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])

(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4] ep2 [1][2][3][4] ep3 [1][2][3] ep4 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][+1] ep5 [1][2][3][4][5] ep6 [1][2][3] ep7 [1][2][3][4][5][6] ep8 [1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9] ep9 [1][2][3][4][5][6])

so babe, hear me out. we could adopt him. just spitballing here (agatha, probably)

bwahhaha fantasy!billy and his death stare, meanwhile real billy is such a polite baby

if you look closely you can tell Joe Locke is fighting for his life holding down laughter in a lot of his scenes with Katrhyn. he has nerves of steel, couldn't be me

(also, billy telling her she has neither the respect of her peers NOR a fulfilling home life? harsh, but fair.) (at least her wife is trying to fix the home life part)

honey, don't go around kicking grumpy little twinks now! perfectly in character. despite her chaotic exterior, rio is a very lawful person. she is literally the laws of nature!

the Ballad plays faintly in the background when Billy mentions the Road

I love when good actors have to pretend to be bad actors. and I also find it interesting that Agatha cast herself as a good guy. does it make her feel better? is she telling herself that all the atrocities were justified, that it was only survival instinct? (like rio said, she's only lying to herself)

I had to look up the painting, it's Macbeth meeting the three witches (thank you Reddit!) So Macbeth (Agatha) and Banquo (Billy) meeting Lilia, Jen and Alice?

how did I miss Billy sitting on the chair Rio was just on?! amazing lens choices here too

Wanda's death makes her cry again. I honestly, honestly believe she feels awful about what she did to her. but guilt will never be enough to redeem her - especially because she tends to run away from it.

Wanda's magic was so strong that it took at least four things to undo the spell: Wanda dying, Rio's intervention, Billy's counterspell, and Agatha's willpower. It was a group effort, Agatha could have never done it alone. And despite her scorched earth tactics, there are still two people in her life, rio and billy, willing to help out in her hour of need

it's naughty tiiiime

I still really love the curls

can I say iconique?

it's like someone's about to die at the end of this

bwahahahahaah and oh my GAWD all the case files and boxes, where did she GET that stuff, did she rob a precinct, did she make them with the power of arts and crafts

you know what I think? being naked here is a power move. she is being very over the top because she's really uncomfortable, she just woke up and she's in those moments when you stop dreaming and have to relearn what's real and what isn't. she is someone used to calculate and scheme and micromanage every aspect of her life and she is not in control right now. what does Agatha do to reclaim control? she puts on a show. to her, being under the spell was way more like being naked, her insecurities and emotions and past were out in the open for everyone to see. being physically naked could never be nearly as distressing, and this is a nakedness she chose, because it tells people nothing about herself, nothing of what she wants to keep secret and protected. she's got the upper hand, not the other way round

you are all cowards and sheep for not saying Wanda's name, says the lady who would rather hide under a dozen magic layers than face her problems

that is so nice that they brought her groceries actually??? and lol those are the flowers in Agatha's crime scene pictures

that little girl is having a great time

FUCK CLOTHES BUT FUCK THESE CLOTHES SPECIFICALLY!!!!

(wait am I allowed to post butt cheeks? what are the rules right now?)

she turns quiet and emo as soon as she's alone

why doesn't she just - kiss the wiwwle bunny. bury her nose in that big fluffly head. even villains need a cuddle sometimes.

sure, bring señor scratchy. so menacing. that'll show them.

poor boy. trapped in a closet with ralph's bluray collection

aaand I really want to get to the next scene so I'll start on it right away, hopefully it'll be ready later tonight

go to part 4

[varpusvaras]

You know, Jason could get past the whole Tim being Robin thing. He could get past the fact that Bruce made someone else Robin (or more accurately that he let someone else be Robin). He could get past the fact that there is a new kid so soon after his death. He could get past the fact that Dick likes Tim more. He could get past all that, you know?

But then he finds out that Tim dropped out of school and ooooh boy, isn't that the final nail in the coffin. Jason didn't get to finish high school, and now this rich twink is dropping out voluntarily? No, no, absolutely not, Jason hates him with his whole being.

[mulletmitsuya]

Toman Captains + BajiFuyuTora Groupchat

Warnings: swearing, suggestive, mentions of substances, mentions of PTSD

Desc: Baji tries to make a polycule work with some heavy convincing

Baji: alr guys, i'm gonna ask Fuyu and Tora out on a date at the same time

Mitsuya: that's not gonna work

Draken: don't they hate each other? just pick one

Baji: no i'm in love with the both of them so i'm gonna ask both of them out

Baji: also they actually have feelings for each other but haven't realized it yet

Draken: you're pushing it

Smiley: first of all, Kazutora likes women

Baji: no, he has feelings for me but he hasn't realized it yet

Smiley: alright man

Mikey: Baji, your chances are better with Chifuyu. sort that out first because you're gonna ruin the entire friendgroup dynamic with this shit😟

Baji: we're not a friendgroup, we're lovers

Mikey: i'm talking about us, dipshit

Baji: who

Mikey: everyone who isn't Chifuyu and Kazutora??

Baji: idgaf

Mikey: ayt

Pah: weren't we your treasures or smth 🧐?

Baji: i've moved on to bigger things

Baji: smaller twinks

Baji: you get me?

Smiley: Chifuyu's short but he's not a twink.

Smiley: now Kazutora, we can call a twink

Smiley: you guys are using this word wrong

Mikey: it's it just a skinny guy?

Smiley: "a gay or effeminate man, or a young man, regarded as an object of homosexual desire, usually a bottom. they are attractive and slim in appearance."

Draken: this is just Mitsuya

Mikey: 🧐

Mitsuya: ?

Smiley: that is correct but i didn't wanna say anything cause that twink got hands🤷‍♂️

Mikey: now that i think about it, Mitsuya used to be kinda built. not buff but not skinny. fuck happened

Pah: Draken died

Pah: "died"

Baji: so he stopped eating? lame

Mitsuya: do you guys get how mourning works

Draken: well i'm good now so let's get this grub 🗣

Draken: sorry for making you sad, brother

Draken: it's my mission to bulk you up again

Mitsuya: i'm fine👍

Mikey: no one dying is going to get in between me and a meal😭🙏

Mikey: skill issue on Mitsuya's part

Smiley: skill issue is when your friend dies and you go into a depression so deep that you can't even eat anymore

Mikey: that's what i'm saying❗

Smiley: leave it up to Draken to get shot 3 times in the chest and just walk it off

Smiley: that was kinda hard tho

Draken: thanks👍

Draken: it hurt really bad

Draken: i think it traumatized me

Draken: i can't go to amusement parts now. or listen to fireworks cause i'll start hallucinating shit that happened from that night. weird

Mitsuya: ...that's called ptsd

Baji: yeah man you have ptsd

Draken: what's ptsd

Baji: PTSDEEZ NUTS LMAOOOOOOO

Baji: GOT EM

Draken: i wish your suicide attempt worked you mentally challenged, wanna be werewolf, loreal shampoo ad looking ass bitch

Baji: BANG BANG BANG💣💥💣💥💣💥

Mikey: DUDE💀

Baji: do you guys get it

Baji: it's the gunshots

Baji: because he has PTSD

Baji: 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Draken: do you remember how you killed Shinichiro

Baji: 😐

Mikey: GUYS💀

Draken: i'm sorry Mikey

Draken: but

Draken: Baji do you remember when you were screaming his name and watched him bleed to death

Smiley: ☠️

Draken: the skull represent Shinichiro, who you killed

Baji: anyway

Baji: back to my kittens

Baji: before Draken decided to take shit too far😒

Draken: when you go low I'll go lower

Baji: cause you were almost 6 feet under???

Draken: where you put Shinichiro??

Baji: ANYWAY

Mikey: Ken-chin he's gonna kill himself again😔

Draken: that is exactly the point

Baji: HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY ANYWAY

Baji: anyway

Baji: back to the topic at hand 😐

Baji: i'm doing it tonight

Mitsuya: ahem

Mitsuya: do you know how awkward it's gonna be when Kazutora rejects you? we don't wanna have to deal with that

Baji: he won't reject me

Mikey: your delusional

Baji: can you guys name a situation in which things didn't work out for me?

Baji: no you can't

Mitsuya: 1) Bloody Halloween??

Draken: 2) Your grades🤨?

Mikey: 3) Not making your mom cry🤔?

Baji: ...

Baji: those don't count

Smiley: it's so hard trying to talk to stupid people

Smiley: he doesn't use logic at all

Draken: Baji don't fucking ask them out

Mikey: ask Chifuyu!!! that f slur is obsessed with you😍

Draken: don't say that word😐

Mikey: i literally didn't say it😭

Mitsuya: Baji please just think for literally one second

Baji: too late cause i just texted them

Mitsuya: omfg

Mikey: you fool😞

Mikey: what did you say??

Baji: i went to our groupchat

Baji: "yo let's cut the bullshit. i'm in love with the both of you so why don't we all date and love each other in a relationship with all three of us and shit"

Baji: i sent that

Smiley: you're very... direct

Smiley: i'll give you that

Smiley: Kazutora's gonna say no

Draken: obviously

Baji: bet

Baji's kittens:

Kazutora: Chifuyu can you please change the fucking groupchat name

Kazutora: i know you and Baji do kinky shit together but i am NOT anybody's kitten

Chifuyu: but Baji-san changed it and i can't change it back if he doesn't want me to

Chifuyu: and Baji-san and i do not do "kinky shit"

Chifuyu: we don't have a sexual relationship😐

Kazutora: you have free will mothefucker!! you don't need his fucking permission

Kazutora: is he your dom or something😭

Kazutora: why are so obsessed with him jesus

Kazutora: you guys are gay af

Chifuyu: just because i don't stab my friends doesn't mean i'm gay

Chifuyu: i just respect him a lot cause he's cool 😒

Chifuyu: nothing you'd know about

Chifuyu: you psychopath

Kazutora: you slobber on his dick all day

Kazutora: "Baji-san!!! What a cool kick!! Can you teach me😁?"

Kazutora: you might as well just ask him to put it in

Chifuyu: shut the fuck up all you've ever known are the prison walls that enclosed you

Kazutora: NOT ANYMORE😁

Baji: ladies, ladies

Baji: there's enough to go around 😏

Baji: ew. alright i'm never using that emoji again what the fuck

Kazutora: CHANGE THE GROUPCHAT NAME

Baji: no

Kazutora: you and Chifuyu can do your pet play somewhere else please leave me out of it 🙏

Baji: nuh uh

Baji: you're a tiger

Baji: tigers are cats

Baji: so you're a kitten

Baji: done deal

Kazutora: i'm an adult tiger not a kitten😐

Baji: i'm the alpha and you and Chifuyu are my omega's

Kazutora: what the fuck does that mean????

Chifuyu: haha Baji-san😂

Kazutora: i've never seen someone ride someone else's meat so hard before holy shit

Chifuyu: if you don't understand what respect is, just say that 🙄

Baji: don't lie Chifuyu

Baji: you're in love with me

Kazutora: LMFAOOOOOOOOO

Baji: you are too Kazutora

Kazutora: 🤨

Baji: yo let's cut the bullshit. i'm in love with the both of you so why don't we all date and love each other in a relationship with all three of us and shit

Baji: you guys are in love with each other too just by the way

Kazutora: what

Kazutora: that's not how anything works

Chifuyu: Baji-san i ask again is this a prank 🤣🤣🤣

Kazutora: it has to be cause i'm not a boy kisser like you mfs

Baji: Kazutora be fr. you just got out of prison, you're clinically insane, you're on parole, people feel unsettled by your presence, you have an ankle bracelet, you belong to the state, you have mommy AND daddy issues, you've killed someone

Kazutora: damn

Kazutora: you didn't have to list it like that

Baji: all i'm saying is that i'm your best option because i don't care about all of this and i'll take care of you for the rest of your life even tho you're crazy

Baji: cause i love you (gayly)

Baji: you could even stab me again

Chifuyu: NO

Baji: Chifuyu shut the up i'll get to you babe

Chifuyu: yes Baji-san

Kazutora: "yes daddy😩😍"

Kazutora: what the fuck dude you could least try to hide it 💀

Baji: can u focus

Kazutora: oh right

Kazutora: what about gay sex tho

Baji: i'll teach you

Kazutora: but you have a dick

Baji: uhhhh

Baji: fine you can use yours

Baji: nah nevermind i'm not a bottom

Baji: fuck you

Kazutora: i didn't even say anything

Kazutora: but whatever ig

Kazutora: i'm not gonna be with Chifuyu tho😐

Baji: you are

Kazutora: 😒

Baji: Chifuyu we've been in love for years so i know you'll say yes. just needed to convince Tora babygirl

Chifuyu: but is this a prank tho🤣🤣

Baji: no

Baji: you are my boyfriend now

Baji: both of you come over

Kazutora: ughhhhhhhhhhhhh

Kazutora: fine

Chifuyu: are the both of you pranking me🤣😂

Baji: just come over you fucking idiot

Baji: that was too mean

Baji: please come over you fucking idiot❤

Captains:

Baji: they said yes and we're all about to have sex now

Mikey: you're just gonna lie Baji

Draken: should i get beers? you can cry if you want i won't even laugh at you

Draken: i promise

Mikey: you're just gonna lie Ken-chin

Mitsuya: what did they actually say

Baji: they're coming over? and we're about to make love? are you guys dumb 🤨

Baji: it worked out how i said it would

Smiley: Draken gets the beers i'll get the cigarettes

Smiley: Baji we tried to tell you

Draken: don't piss me off cause you know i don't smoke

Draken: you're gonna influence Angry into an early grave

Draken: do you want your brother to have lung cancer

Smiley: chill

Smiley: Angry tried a cigarette and almost died

Smiley: so you don't have to worry about that

Smiley: fine i'll bring weed instead

Mitsuya: where are you getting drugs😐

Smiley: my plug, duh 😁

Mikey: can i have a weed as well please

Smiley: idk man what if your dark impulses come out or something

Mikey: my therapist said that only happens with specific triggers so it's fine

Mikey: plus i have a shock collar in case that happens

Draken: i don't think that's normal 🤨

Baji: you guys are pissing me off

Mikey: dude it's fine we can comfort you even tho we told you so

Draken: i'm gonna be the better man and forgive you since you've just been rejected

Baji: yk what idgaf

Baji: i'ma just nut in my kittens

Baji: bye losers

Baji: no one does it like i do

Mikey: poor thing🙁

[discjude]

Oh boy oh boy its the discjude official COVEN bingo card!!! not many are about the coven themselves because i uh uh don't know too much about them but yeah. I've put a brief explanation of each of these under the cut (because a few are vague) (WARNING its a lot):

Lady Lesso mentioned: this one sort of coincides with "hester true evil speech". I reckon she's important enough to the witches to warrant a mention. Also. I think all of the Lessos might be relevant but I talk about that in my predictions

Obligatory Sophie cameo: she's Soman's favourite. She's showing up

Political commentary: based off of his substack, I don't think Soman will go too overt with it, but I think there'll be a more roundabout one. I'd love to see him address the fact that he wrote in that homophobia is a thing in SGE. Soman if you can hear me

Drag race reference: He's done this a lot before, in QFG mostly, and I think he'll do it again

TCY acknowledged: this could be like a "haha yeah you remember how the storian almost got destroyed? that was kinda crazy aha". I have a horrible feeling that he's going to completely skip over that part of canon

Hester gives a speech about "true evil": i mean come ooonnnnnnn. I also think this'll include something about evil love that contradicts the canon about it

No blatant fatphobia regarding dot: Soman phased this out in TCY I think he'll have stuck with it

Rats are, somehow, back. Not explained: Japeth killed at least one of those things and I genuinely think Soman will have forgotten it

Events of R+F acknowledged: ties into my predictions a bit, but I reckon the setup regarding neverland and the other stuff in Fall might come up

I'm right about my predictions: I think the entire thing looks very aquatic themed, and there's a lot regarding evil water stuff, so a) the mermaids are relevant b) the saders are (still) relevant c) the lessos are relevant. that's the big three in my opinion. I can't wait to be horrifically wrong

Storian still at fault: i mean. name one book where it isn't. and you cant say OTK that doesnt COUNT

Symbolic ending of the series thing: I want the storian dead. thats what this one means

Obligatory tagatha: come onnnnnnnnn

There is at least one twink: yeah. not much to say here

Vaguely pub-style setting: this one also includes "why is everything british" because i said so

None Japeth: Japeth is mentioned by name exactly no times. I'd love to have faith but I really don't

Tennis reference: I fucking CAUGHT Botic being a tennis player's surname in the prequels. he's GOING to try it again

Colour/lighting symbolism: have a draft rn about colour symbolism in SGE and I think Soman might lean into it

At least one snake: please i want to feel something

hestadil real: come ON he's doing this every tiktok post about coven has had the hestadil tag he's doing this

Aric is referenced: goes with my predictions and lady lesso being mentioned. I hate to say it I think he's far more likely to be referenced than Japeth

Big unanswered question gets answered: the BIG!! one is the Aric Dad Reveal. I want to know for parallel reasons and I think it could happen. maybe

no wait! We'll use the power of friendship: speaks for itself. something like this happens

major character death: goodbye dot. im being fr I think she's dying in coven

Thank you dearly to @liketwoswansinbalance for some of these entries I really struggled to think of some. Also no I'm not convinced of my predictions. But it'd be nice. right

[liarvibe]

@snowbirdbaby and @ultimateplaylistmaker

Considering that I'm brainstorming a version of Canon Gonta that is canon compliant while also still being horrible, I'd say that all is going according to plan~

(Also the amount of encouragement I'm getting is so fucking funny caghcfxhbjvhx)

Right now I'm playing with the idea of Gonta's capability to just. Fucking lie out of his ass and no one questions it (him telling everyone he was raised by wolves in a country where there IS NO WOLF POPULATION...) and him being a super genius (the fact he learned so many complicated human stuff that took others 10 years to do so in a fraction of a time, that thing where he found a parasite or something and made a cure for it) and this is the sort of characterization I've come up with so far for a Fucked Up (Little) Man that's still canon compliant:

Gonta was not raised by wolves or reptiles. He raised himself.

I'm imagining that Gonta ran off into the woods and got lost, but instead of starving to death, his super computer brain was able to figure out how to reinvent traps and hunting tools and he survived on his own that way--by hunting and gathering.

He built his own little hut and grew used to (and even enjoyed) living in the wilds. The severe isolation fucked with his social and moral development, however, so when he was found and brought back to human society, he at first had a VERY hard time adjusting. His super computer brain caught on to almost everything very quickly, but his social and moral behaviors were still incredibly "feral" for the longest time. He even tried to reject human society several occasions and Rin back into the woods but they found him every time.

Eventually he gave up running away and gave up on understanding human ethics and morality--so he started playing dumb. It obviously worked because everyone was treating him like a feral idiot to begin with, but playing dumb allowed Gonta to get away with breaking a good portion of society's "weird rules", and they can't blame poor stupid wild child Gonta because he doesn't know any better.

Taking Gonta from the woods was the worst thing that ever happened to him tbh.

Being treated like an idiot and everyone falling for the idiot act so easily made Gonta look down on humans and everyone in general. Like how stupid are these weirdo apes for believing my very obvious lies! They think they're smarter than him and they talk down to him and they don't even KNOW.

Then Gonta meets Kokichi.

Kokichi, this pretty twink of a man who lies so obviously yet confuses everyone else with his obvious lies. A mischief maker, another rule breaker--and for once, while Kokichi is saying things that align with everyone else in treating Gonta like a fool (when they are the fools),this time it's different. Kokichi isn't actually treating him like he's an idiot--in fact, he's considering his perspective and words far more, on the level of being an equal. He includes Gonta in on his little plans and asks for his perspective.

He treats Gonta like an equal--but equals they are not.

Maybe Kokichi is smarter than the others, smart enough to see through Gonta's most obvious lies--but he isn't as smart as Gonta. He doesn't realize Gonta's true nature and how he's playing dumb on purpose--kind, naive Kokichi, he thinks that Gonta's misbehaviors aren't intentional! He thinks that it must be hard to integrate back into human society with no issues (he's right but Gonta won't admit that) and that Gonta doing things that break social rules are innocent and kind in nature. Kokichi, the liar who doesn't trust anyone else, thinks that Gonta is trustworthy and kind. He believes in Gonta. He believes Gonta has a heart of pure gold, that his kindness is genuine, that their little friendship bond is real and not Gonta studying and isolating Kokichi on a mere curious whim.

What a naive idiot.

[gentleralts]

not to be a downer but while i agree with the sentiment of what the "death note AU where hbomberguy solves the kira case while investigating light yagami for something unrelated to the murders" post is trying to go for, it gets a bunch of stuff fundamentally wrong about light as a character and of how the death note itself works, and as a noted Light Yagami Hater™ i feel like i should set things straight here:

light was top of his class in high school and got into one of the most prestigious universities in his region. he does his research pretty thoroughly and would not even consider plagiarizing anything, especially with how unreliable it would make you look if you got caught. this "light would probably be a plagiarist if he was a youtuber" bit seems like it's there just because the james sommerton video is so fresh in our minds; if that post was drafted like a year ago there'd probably be a bit in there instead about light straight up lying about his accomplishments and how his mother is very proud

"light would have unhinged right-wing political takes if he was on youtube" there's a pretty significant possibility that he would, although not intentionally. light would brand himself as more of a center-left intellectual debater type and gets popular going up against people who are so right-wing that his points seem progressive by comparison (on top of him being conventionally attractive), and that would make stuff like his misogyny and pro-cop stances and "there are some types of people the world would be better off without" sentiments stand out when comparing him to more leftist youtubers. hbomb's initial investigation into light likely started out with the thesis of "light yagami can get away with saying shit like this because he's an extremely fuckable twink"

the thing about that post that stood out to me as its most egregious mistake though was the insistence of legal names being the ones you need to kill someone with the note. you've probably seen joke posts going around before like "if you write a trans person's deadname into the death note it kills you instead," and that's built upon one of the rules of the death note:

[id: The names you see with the eye power of a god of death are the names needed to kill that person. You will be able to see the names even if that person isn't registered in the family registration.]

a name doesn't have to be legally registered for it to work, and a legal name might not even work in some cases. granted a change of a legal name could still be a viable defensive strategy to throw off someone trying to research what your name is, but outright saying "i've legally changed my name to something you won't be able to find out so you can't kill me" will not protect you from the death note at all.

in my opinion, i believe the point in which hbomb spots the thread leading to his conclusion of light yagami being behind the kira murders is around the end of the yotsuba arc. he'd be able to intuit the first, second, and third kiras being separate entities by the types of people they kill, and the situation of "this guy i've been looking into has dropped off the face of the internet for like two months and the kira murders are suddenly different" would probably be too interesting of coincidence for him to ignore

[skeletonapricationday]

Even more spicy David Headcannons

Here's the first one

I forgot how fun headcannons were, especially smutty ones. My David kink is never ending. I know I legit posted minutes ago but IDGAF!

He's so twitchy, he can't help it. His thighs jump and jolt, his fingers clench and twitch, his head can't decide which direction its going with every wave of pleasure. His twitchy self is all over the place. Sometimes you just gotta hold the man down. (He loves being pinned anyway.)

He is so touchy. The only time he pulls your hair is on accident, when his needy hands find there way on your head during a blowjob. Sometimes he'll tug you when he doesn't feel you're close enough when he's doing you from behind. He'll grip his hands onto your back while you ride him, making it impossible to pull away from him. This twink has needy strength!

Speaking of blowjobs, he doesn't exactly know his stance on them. They feel incredible, and he enjoys the closeness. Yet, at the same time he hates making you swallow. You're very adamant about it, especially since he's such a healthy eater, you enjoy it. At the same time he would be disheartened if you spit, so there's no winning. He'll always accept one, but it isn't the first thing that comes to mind when he thinks about getting freaky with you.

Now, on the other hand he loves 69ing. It's the best of both worlds to him. It's harder to think about the guilt of you swallowing his unborn children when his tongue is busy. Plus if he cums prematurely he still has his mouth to work you. He loves the way your wetness drips down onto his face and the way you taste, that added onto the pleasure of your mouth wrapped around his cock- there's nothing better. Well, expect actual sex of course.

His tongue is always busy, and I mean busy. He has an obsession with giving rather than receiving. Something about the way you coo and praise him, the way you moan. He loves when your toes curl, when your thighs turn into earmuffs, and being practically waterboarded by your wetness. If he hasn't made you cum once from shoving his tongue inside you during a sexual rendezvou, he has failed. And Davy ain't no quitter. It goes on and on if you don't stop him, so watch out.

David doesn't enjoy being tied up. He hates not being able to run his hands all over you. Wether its having a death grip on your ass, thighs, or even your waist he wants it. He worships you from top to bottom, and that's hard to do with his hands tied. Now, he has found out on the other hand he enjoys tying you up. He still isn't the most dominant when he does, but he does get revenge for all those "one more" s you've given him.

David gains more confidence in the bedroom over time, which is natural for most relationships but when you say confidence you mean it. The more sure he is that he can make you orgasm, the more excited he is for the session. When you taught him how to properly finger you (hes not a virgin, just none of his exes talked him through it), he kept asking you to be his test dummy for weeks. Hes quite the quick learner. Once he learned the basics he became utterly focused on mastering them, and he has. Which has lead to his sexual confidence, at least towards you.

David comes with a nasty habit. He anxiously bites his bottom lip, always leaving it sore and red. This upsets you since he's got such a pretty mouth. He does this in and out of the bedroom. You basically have to shove your fingers in his mouth to make him stop, which has awakened a whole new kink within him. He's started doing it on purpose just so he can feel your dominant hand stop him and fingers press on the bottom of his tongue. Something about the weight and intimacy of it turns him on.

This boy just can't stop saying please. He's so polite even when he's asking to cum. It's such a cute habit of his. "Please let me cum." "Please, you're so tight. I can't do it." "Baby, please." He finds a new use for the word every time you fuck.

He sure knows how to beg. Davy has started looking for the keywords you like the most in bed. Learning what to plead for and what to subtlety demand. You haven't even noticed it over time but his every word is catered to your needs and lust. Oh mommy can't he cum early just this once?

Oh yes he says mommy, look at that cute little face. He just wants to babied every once in a while. Let him lay back with a goofy grin on his face covered in wetness as he patiently waits for more from his mommy. David doesn't say it often cause it makes him feel emrbassed, but when he gets really into it, it just slips out. You first learned about his mommy kink on accident. He was pumping deep inside of you squeezing his eyes shut with an agape mouth on the brink of an orgasm when it slipped. When he said his first mommy you couldn't help but make him cum again and again, hearing it was so cute!

David has no problem exploring any interesting kinks or fetishes you have. He makes you deal with his (you do more than just deal, you enjoy), so of course he'd willingly try yours. Wether its a night when he ends up blindfolded and covered in wax, or a more subtle fetish like spitting into his mouth, he'll try it. Getting you off gets him off. He's a pleasure bottom all the way.

David isn't exactly packing. He isn't huge but he isn't small either. He's working with a perfect 6 inches, average across the board. It's not so big that it'll hurt or take too much preparation, but it's not so small that you don't feel a thing. Like a dirtier version of goldilocks you think his dick is just right.

The base starts out the color of his skin and slowly fades into a dusty pink. It's like the perfect shade to you. He's your multicolored fun stick. He isn't very veiny, he doesn't work out much afterall. His job is athletic enough (herding kids is cardio, for sure). And yes, the carpet does match the drapes.

[archduchessofnowhere]

Folks I just came across the most incredible Habsburg lithography I've ever seen:

It doesn't look that odd at first glance but the more you look at each person the more ????? the picture becomes.

Like first I saw Emperor Franz holding hands with Empress Caroline, ok that's kind of cute! But then I noticed the then Crown Princess Maria Anna crying and praying?? What's going on.

And then I realized Crown Prince Ferdinand is fucking dying in the background???

I don't know who these guys are meant to be but the ones at the right are looking straight at the camera like if they were in The Office.

But this isn't the most ??? things of this picture. Because then I noticed the angel apparently ready to guide Ferdinad to the other world and I need you to tell me if I'm insane or if you see it too.

Guys. Guys. Is the half naked angel... Reichstadt????????

Or is it just a random twink angel???????? Please tell me what you think this will drive me insane jgkgk.

EDIT because I noticed the angel has a dagger so maybe he's actually protecting Ferdinand from death (and if he is meant to be Franz then it's sweet that he's depicted as an angel who protects his family from the other side not that they deserve it much lol)

Anyway I looked it up and apparently Ferdinand almost died in December of 1832, so this lithography of 1833 is depicting that, in a very normal, not bizarre at all way.

[idlebeks]

A few more SVSSS recs for the pile

right from the start, I gave you my heart by nex_et_nox

"Bro, you know how many words I wrote per day, and how many plants I created!” Shang Qinghua whines. "I can't remember them all, it's impossible."

Shen Qingqiu narrows his eyes. "It was used with Wife #418.”

"That doesn't narrow it down any further. I'm not going to be able to guess it, so stop punishing me and just tell me how the flower nerfed you."

Shen Qingqiu grits his teeth. Obviously he wants to draw this out to punish Shang Qinghua, but it kinda looks more like he's punishing himself. There's a muscle flexing in his jaw, and if he puts any more pressure on his fan's guard, it's going to snap. Uh, actually, Shen Qingqiu kind of looks like he's in pain—

“A false dragonhead is also called an obedient plant. It’s in the name—the flower forces you to do whatever you're told," Shen Qingqiu spits out.

or: Shen Qingqiu runs afoul of one of Airplane's stupid wife-plot devices...just before a mission to Jinlan City.

stuffed with fluff (and blood and bones and rage) by nyoomerr

Ever since he was pushed into the Abyss, Luo Binghe has been dreaming of a strange world. In it, Luo Binghe's own face is everywhere, and his story is written out in humiliating detail for some stupid twink to read about. Luo Binghe hates the story, and he hates the dream realm, and he hates the godling within it - Shen Yuan - most of all.

Unfortunately, Luo Binghe can't do anything about it - within these dreams, Luo Binghe is stuck within the body of a doll.

second-hand alibis by nex_et_nox

“All right. I’m in Proud Immortal Demon Way," he says, once he's had a chance to compose himself again. He sits back up, tossing his stupidly long hair back over his shoulders where it belongs; he is totally calm and ready to grill the System for more information.  "Who am I supposed to be?"

Please please please don't let it be someone who Bingge violently murders.

Though given the fact that he's a man in PIDW, his chances are already skewed, and not in his favor. Ugh.

[Bound Role: Shen Yuan, Rogue Cultivator. Weapon: the sword Heng Li. Starting B-points: 100.]

or: Shen Yuan transmigrates as a rogue cultivator, one completely unconnected to any canon characters or events. Right, System? Right?

Type Casting by pallas_rose

Shang Qinghua’s fertilizer has unexpected effects on the mushroom body. In addition to... that, Shen Qingqiu doesn’t remember his death. Or anything at all after planting the Sun Moon Dew Mushroom seed in the dirt.

But he doesn’t need to, right? Shen Qingqiu knows PIDW and Luo Bing-ge like the back of his hand. He’ll be fine. He just has to avoid getting noticed—you know what happens to beautiful women in PIDW!

…though would life in the harem be so bad?

says the shadow by tciddaemina

Luo Binghe wakes up to the heavy, suffocating feeling that something is wrong.

His back aches, sleeping on the floor of the woodshed has left him stiff and sore, and yet all the pain and agony of his latest caning fades into inconsequentiality, washed away in the face of the sheer, suffocating, heavy dread pressing down on his shoulders. It steals the oxygen from the air, swelling to fill every inch of the room, the pressure crushing.

His eyes open too quickly, and he scrambles up, heart pounding in his throat, head snapping towards the door of the shed. There's a knot in his throat, thick, and he struggles to swallow around it, throat suddenly dry.

The woodshed looks as it always has. Nothing has changed.

Everything has changed.

-

Luo Binghe's shizun has a qi deviation and the thing left afterwards isn't Shen Qingqiu.

Shen Yuan's School for Unrepentant Assholes by TGP

Shen Yuan has been dealt a rough hand at the beginning of his life. Then he gets sort of adopted by Shen Qingqiu, who desperately needs someone to help smooth out his interpersonal relationships. Thankfully, Shen Yuan is awesome at understanding people and what they want!

Shen Qingqiu can't decide if he regrets claiming this chaos gremlin as his own or not, but now that Shen Yuan is here, he's never letting him go. He'll have to be pried out of Shen Qingqiu's cold, dead fingers first.

Meanwhile, Luo Binghe is just caught up in the wake of both of them and trying not to be dragged under.

(Or, a drama of errors with comedic moments, exploring the growing relationship between an unforgiving misanthrope with serious issues and a traumatized kid that just wants to teach him what family means (and maybe learn it, himself))

dreaming you the same sun in a different place by JRaylin441

[Activating: Bonus Chapter – In Another Life]

[We notice that you are searching for someone. Would you like to accept the bonus chapter mission In Another Life in order to reunite with User: Shen Yuan, Bound Role: Shen Qingqiu?]

Shen Qingqiu disappears. Luo Binghe isn't going to let that stand.

Written for a Gotcha for Gaza prompt "Luo Binghe sucking Shen Yuan's dick (any dynamic)" from an anonymous prompter

[gay-tomcat]

Its kinda annoying imo how people always call Rollo a religious Twink or like something relating to religion. When he's not at all religious, like I understand perfectly that Rollo is based off a religious character and has a lot of religious symbolism in his design and mannerisms. But he's not actually religious, there isn't a mention of Catholicism or the church like the type Frollo does.

Or maybe I'm wrong and misremembering Glorious Masquerade, or there's something explained in JP that wasn't in EN

But anyway, I think of Rollo as much more like a depressed and determined teenager with a complex who's also very goth. Like not the standard goth where you dress in black but like a Victorian Gothic sorta way. I think his white hair and bowl cut add to this a lot. And I think it better represents him as a character because of where he comes from and his goals. Though his plan and goal is akin to a genocide and he views himself as the only person willing/capable of doing so by eliminating magic from Twisted Wonderland. He only does this based on his belief of magic being evil from his brothers death.

And I don't think you can't he isn't depressed, this guy barely sleeps, constantly writes in his journal while monologuing into a fire and laughing like a mad man. And eats 2 croissants and 16 grapes exactly everyday.

I'm sure he probably eats more but that being his only set meal is very silly in a character way but also very telling and accurate in representing someone's depression. A lot of the times depressed people will simply have a meal that they predetermine and eat over and over, because it's not about the food really. I mean that's what I did and still kinda do, I'm not saying eating like this at all makes you depressed or that it's a depression exclusive thing either btw. But I just think it goes to show the depressive nature of Rollo and how he deals with his trauma and 'savior' complex.

Still, I think he posses a lot of charms a lot of people don't see him in. And he'd look just as good in some scene core or emo clothing with piercings and wrings as he does normally. I think Rollo is really just a sad teenager who internally has a lot of issues like everyone else but instead of being a regular or normal sad teenager and expressing himself to try and get his feelings across. He eats two croissants and 16 grapes for breakfast and than monologues to the fireplace about how evil magic is and how he will save the world like a little freak. I think if he just had someone to talk to and maybe some other food groups in his diet he'd be better off.

So yeah, Rollo's not religious he's just goth. Twink still applies though.