#tw: reference to ABA therapy

[clownrecess]

(TW: Talk of ABA, trauma, abuse, self offing, etc.)

ABA is abusive whether you want to admit it or not. It just is.

It doesn't "depend on the therapist", it is abusive by nature. The abuse and trauma inducing experiences are deeply rooted in it.

"Oh, well ours is basically just some OT and speech", that's not ABA, then. Whilst yes, OT and speech do very much have the ability to be abusive, ABA always is. A combination of some in home OT and speech is not ABA.

So what is ABA? ABA stands for applied behavioural analysis. It is a "therapy" that parents of autistic people are usually pushed to do. And often times, the parents agree! Whether that's because the insurance covers it, or because the school told them to, or whatever, they tend to accept it.

I was one of the people who's parents accepted it.

I was in ABA for a little over a year, I would have been in it much longer but eventually I was taken out because I threatened to off myself if I remained in it. And this didnt work immediately, I had been threatening this for months. I'm not sure why it finally worked.

ABA likes to trick you at the start. My therapists in particular referred to this tricking as the "honeymoon phase". In this phase, they would act like my friends. They made me trust them.

We would talk about our interests, and play games together.

It felt safe, and I liked it!

Until it changed, that is. About two months into ABA, they stopped being like my friends.

It went from me happily playing chess with him, to him yelling at me, a child hiding under a table, because I didn't say what he wanted me to say.

And this of course evolved too. And I was further traumatized.

I was tricked, and then abused by the hands of so called therapists.

It has been around 2, almost 3 years since this. I am still extremely frightened by anything remotely related to those experiences.

I had a panic attack in a water park because somebody looked **slightly** like one of them.

Please don't put your kid in ABA. I don't care how helpful you think it'll be.

[strangerdarkerbetter]

Hi! I found your blog under the "actuallyautistic" tag. I'm a neurotypical woman, and I'm writing my thesis on neurodiversity in autism intervention. After scouring the tags on Tumblr, I've found that identity first is normally preferred, but my advisor (who has a doctorate in ABA) has told me to use person first terminology ("person with autism"). I know one person on Tumblr does not represent the entire autism community, but do you have any insight on this? Thank you!

First, I really appreciate that you are seeking out autistic voices to help guide you in your work. It is very refreshing.

The majority of the autistic community prefers identity first language for a number of reasons. One of the main reasons is that autism is an intrinsic part of who we are. We are not neurotypical people covered in a layer of autism. We are autistic through and through and have been since birth. Our autism can no more be separated from us than a person can be separated from their skin tone. Autistic is something I am not something I have. Just as you would not refer to someone as a person with femaleness, you shouldn’t refer to an autistic person as someone with autism. 

Another reason is that if people need to say that I am a person to remind themselves of that fact, the problem is with them, not me. Language should not have to be manipulated to remind people that I am, in fact, a person. 

The following are some other autistic voices on why they prefer identity first language:

Identity First Language

Why I Dislike Person-First Language

Identity First Language

Further, ABA is a very harmful therapy. It is abusive to autistic people and often leads to PTSD. The following are various autistic people weighing in on why ABA is bad:

ABA Masterpost

Why I Oppose ABA as a Method of Instruction

No You Don’t (tw: discussions of poverty, abuse, rape, discrimination)

ABA 101

Truama and Autism

What ABA Is Like From the Point of View of a Former Therapist

Why I Left ABA

I hope this helps you!

[witchofenoch]

TW ableism Some not-autistic people just don’t get it, some choose not to. My mother is somewhere in between but most chooses not to.

“You don’t stutter.” “You speak well!”/”You’re very articulate!” “You’re so good with people!” “You need to go out! Have fun! Make friends!” “If you get a job you’ll meet new people and make friends!” “Meet new people so you can get out more!” “You didn’t have a panic attack that one time, you’ll be fine!” “You know how to talk to people.” “People love you!” “You'll feel better if you just get out more.” “You don’t know how you’ll feel around people unless you’re around them.” ”Maybe you should look into therapy for your autism.” YES I GET IT MOTHER. But you don’t. At all. You’re a damn social worker. While you may be good with the people you work with, you’re shit at understanding me. I miss when you were just my ignorant, somewhat abusive mom and not my both willfully and unintentionally ignorant, ableist, somewhat more abusive, over-analyzing mother who thinks she knows better because she got a degree.

She doesn’t believe ABA is anything but helpful. Fact: ABA is extremely harmful! For anyone who’s confused about that, ask me or (better option) search “ABA abuse” on tumblr or a search engine (Google, Bing, etc.)

Having a degree does not mean that someone knows what another person feels, knows, understands, thinks, etc. let alone group of people they aren’t included in. Degree =/= expert. Degree = you know some stuff from neurotypical POV.

Before this whole degree thing she’d have listened and at least tried to understand my meanings, look things up that I can’t totally explain or that require more in-depth explanations that I can’t offer myself, like all of the research and first person accounts of ABA and how it actually affects autistic people. She’d have listened. She’s have tried.

With her nifty little degree that cost way too much money? Now she thinks she knows. She doesn’t look anything up. She takes what she’s been told by people who are neurotypical, who have mental illnesses for completely different reasons and to very different extents than mine, who are cisgender or at least binary, who are either homo or het (mayybee a bi or 2), people who are in no way like me. People who are in no way me. Yet she applies the same “logic” to me as to them or to what she’s been taught. Her child < Fancy book learnin’

I know, I know, I know that I need to bring this up. I need to call her out on it. She won’t be upset like angry or anything. I just get so. damn. frustrated! I try to say six things at once and as I’m straightening them out to say one at a time they all just vanish. Having a script has never worked out for me. I have to basically write an entire actual script or a very detailed list that take up several pages front & back: basically an essay. I never make it through that part. It’d have to be a full essay complete with references and original sources and bonus sources (or whatever they’re called. I’ve been out of school too long now).

Ugh