#tw: implied/referenced suicide attempt

[disguting-girl-reads]

MY FAVORITE (LONG) FICS - Wincest Edition

I will not be placing them in any specific order. Also, a long-fic in my definition is anything above 50k words.

Pine Sweat by Goshen (applecrumbledore)

Sam watched Dean hack up firewood with his hatchet. The magically-induced heat wave had his shirt soaked with sweat.

“Did you ever have a, uh… experimental phase?” Sam smacked his lips, trying to think of a diplomatic way to phrase it. “That kid—by which I mean you—has been staring. At me. Kind of a lot.”

(Sam and Dean get sent back to 1996 and go on a hunt with their teenaged selves. The kids don't know who they are.)

This one is so sweet and funny and the plot is so good!! I usually don't go for time-travel stories, but that's a comfort one for me, I really love teenage Dean and Sam in this one.

10 chapters (105,324k words)

TW: Canon-Typical Violence, Animal Death (brief), Mild Gore (not many TW, that's a mostly wholesome one)

To Sound The Depths by Pendragony

Dean has always set aside his needs, repressing his instincts for the sake of Sam. Sometimes he thinks he doesn’t even know how to be an Omega any more. When the brothers pose as a couple to investigate a spate of drowned Alphas, Dean starts to get back in touch with his Omega self. But when the heat is on, will Dean still be able to protect Sam?

a fake dating ABO AU that I love so much. Fake dating for a case is one of my favorite plots in Wincest fics.

15 chapters (66,460k words)

TW: Slight Dub-Con, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Past Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Attempted Sexual Assault

Suave & Complicated by OldToadWoman

Sam and Dean discover a useful, little, magical artifact. No one is forcing them to do anything. No one is going to die if they don't. They don't even feel a strange compulsion. But… it would be really helpful if they powered up the magical stone… and… all they have to do is kiss.

This one is so damm funny. It seens almost like a crack-fic, but the plot is good, and the smut is still hot. Dean is so oblivious in this one, poor dumb thing lol

11 chapters (56,923k words)

TW: Canon-Typical Violence (it's just a really wholesome one)

The Truth In The Lie by flawedamythyst

Sam and Dean pretend to be gay lovers while they hunt a monster on a bus tour of Nova Scotia.

Another fake dating for a case. Also, that was the first wincest fic I've read!

13 chapters (62,264k words)

TW: Graphic Depictions of Violence, Canon-Typical Violence (only TW's is what usually already happens on the show, soooo)

Kill The Lights by silver9mm

Less than a minute had passed since Sam had killed the guard and then five more people. This man’s speech had lasted maybe twenty seconds, but Sam had been separated from Dean for three hundred and sixteen days and nine hours, which made the total time of his life without Dean nearly five complete years, and the thought of listening to this fucker talk for one more second instead of getting his brother and getting the fuck out was unendurable.

I think that's the darkest wincest fic I have read so far. This one wins the most-fucked-up-fic-award in this post. It's really hot, though, and I really enjoyed this one.

35 chapters (143k words)

TW: Extremely Dubious Consent,Rape/Non-con, Bad BDSM Etiquette (really bad guys, lol), Unhappy Ending, Implied Bestiality (really only implied, there's no graphic scenes)

[dixonsdarkelf]

Finding Myself, Finding You: Chapter One

Main masterlist Series masterlist AO3 link Wattpad link

Story is 18+ for mature content/themes, minors do not interact please

TW/CWs for this story--implied/referenced past rape, canonical violence, non-canonical violence, blood, gore, referenced past suicide, swearing, surgery, excessive drinking, nightmares, vomiting, amputation, medical procedures, non-con medical procedures, referenced past medical torture, referenced past drugging, attempted SA, panic attacks, mental health struggles, referenced sibling death, referenced parent death

Each chapter will have its own TW/CWs listed

This story, Lydia Vector, her family & bestie (c) me, dixonsdarkelf

TWD & its characters (c) AMC & Robert Kirkman, the writer of the comic series

TW/CWs for this chapter--blood, violence, amputation, swearing

“Lydia Rae Vector, Board-Certified in Trauma Surgery!”

The grin that spread across my face caused my cheeks to ache. I looked out and saw my parents and brothers, who fought like hell for their front-row seats to witness their only daughter and sister receive her certification. This was the moment I had worked my entire life for.

My residency was complete. And my boards had been passed. I was officially a surgeon.

The “waterproof” mascara I had spent my last $20 on ran and flaked into my eye, causing it to water more. I take my certificate from the officiator, shake his hand, and look out to the audience once again.

And I see him. Every single time, I see him.

A man stumbling down the center aisle, appearing drunk and disorderly, but he’s covered in blood, and his skin is bluish-grey. Decomposition has clearly already started. That was evident by both the open wounds on his body and the putrid stench that accompanied him. And the rest always happens the exact same way.

The crowd notices him, and slowly, the entire auditorium falls silent. Security starts to come around from the emergency exits, but before they can get to him, the man has made his way to the front row.

And he attacks my mother.

Her screams, the screams of my father and brothers, the screams of the audience and the screams coming from my own throat haunt me. He rips her vocal cords out with one swift bite, and her screams cease as quickly as they began.

And this is always where my nightmare ends.

I wake up in a cold sweat, nothing unusual there. I throw myself upwards, letting out a small yelp and feeling all over myself with my hands, checking for wounds and blood. My mornings went exactly the same way.

Every. single. time.

The small shed I had spent the night in looked even dustier during the day. I used my hands to prop myself up off of the floor and and pulled my backpack, which was my pillow every night, out from behind me. Scooting slightly to my left to get out of the blinding sun coming in through the window, I unzipped it and went through the checklist that I always do, making sure every weapon I had was still in its place.

“Axe, knife, guns, spear,” I said out loud, pulling one of the small guns and the collapsible spear out and setting them on the ground next to me. Checking that the safety was still on for both guns, I checked for my other items. Nothing had ever been stolen from me in the night, but you couldn’t be too careful.

“Journal, water bottle, clothes, food, tools, gauze, lighter, bandages, disinfectant, sewing kit, pills, and my most unique weapon.” Once everything was accounted for, I took the blanket I had been using and folded it as best as I could, stuffing it in on top of everything. I slipped my water bottle out and took the smallest sip, just enough to get rid of my cotton mouth and dry throat. I slipped the gun I left on the floor into the strap on my leg and extended my spear, getting up off of the ground and dusting myself off.

I paused for a moment and listened to the birds chirping outside. I wonder what they were saying to each other, I thought to myself. They seem happy. Of course they did. They don’t have to live through the end of the world in the same way humans do.

My reveling in listening to bird calls was quickly interrupted by the sound of a scream. A human scream. And Walker groans.

I swung my backpack onto my shoulders and jumped to the corner next to the door. I lifted my head slowly, just enough for my eyes to enter the window frame.

There was a man, probably around my age, on the ground, and three Walkers surrounding him. I could see that he had lost his knife in the scuffle, and I imagine he was hesitant to use a gun because he didn’t want to attract more of the reanimated corpses. I readied my spear, took a deep breath, and kicked the door open in one fell swoop.

“Aye motherfuckers!” I yelled, drawing the attention of all three Walkers towards me. I skipped backwards, away from the man, putting a little more distance between myself & the undead. I swung my spear and stabbed the closest one right between the eyes, pulling it out and watching the heap fall to the ground. The other two went down similarly. I paused for a moment, perking up my ears and listening to make sure no others were coming.

Once it was clear, I ran to the man. He was still on the ground, groaning in pain. That’s when I saw the bite on his ankle. My heart sank. But I knew what I needed to do. I ran and kneeled down next to him.

“Hey, what’s your name man?” I said to him, trying to keep my voice as calm as possible. I saw a small glimmer of hope in his eyes.

“A-A-Aaron,” he said, gritting his teeth through the pain.

“Alright Aaron, my name is Vector. I’m a doctor, and I can save you, but we gotta get you inside that shed right there. Can you sit up?” He nodded and used his arms to pull himself into a sitting position. I got up on my feet and put an arm around his back, under his arms.

“Alright Aaron, let’s get you on your feet,” I told him, and I saw him nod out of the corner of my eye. He put his body weight onto his right foot & onto me, and we slowly stood up together. Thankfully, the shed was right by us. I got him through the door and helped him back down onto the floor. Once he was on his back, I moved like lightning to get out my small axe, disinfectant, lighter, bandages, gauze, and two of my shirts, one with long sleeves and a small one.

“Aaron, you probably know where this is going, but I’m going to have to cut your foot off. And then I’m going to cauterize your wound so it hopefully won’t get infected,” I said between inhales, taking the my smaller shirt and tying it into a knot to form a gag. We couldn’t have him attracting any more Walkers. “I need you to take this and bite down as hard as you can. Can you do that for me?”

“Yes…” Aaron said. I saw a couple of tears leave his eyes. He put the knotted shirt into his mouth, laying his head back onto the dirty floor. I poured a small amount of disinfectant onto my axe and onto his leg, just above the bite mark. Some of the disinfectant ran into the wound, and he writhed in pain.

“Alright.” I looked over at him, meeting his eyes, “I need you to stay completely still. Bite down as hard as you possibly can. You got this my man.” He squeezed his eyes shut. I raised the axe up, lining it up with where I was going to make my mark.

“I’m so sorry Aaron,” I whispered, swinging the axe down as hard as I could. Thankfully, his foot and ankle came off with one hit. His blood sprayed across the shed, getting onto the walls and all over both of us.

Despite the muffling of the shirt, his screaming was loud. The tears were flowing. And so was the blood. I grabbed my lighter with my right hand and grabbed Aaron’s hand with my left one, squeezing it to remind him he wasn’t alone.

“I’m going to cauterize it next. This pain is probably going to be worse, but I know you can do this. Just keep breathing through your nose and squeeze my hand when you need to,” I told him. He didn’t nod or acknowledge what I said in any way, but I had to keep moving to stop the bleeding. I flicked on my lighter and held it to his open wound, gliding it back and forth across the whole area. I did this for a couple of minutes to ensure the whole area had been cauterized. For Aaron, I’m sure it felt like hours. He squeezed my hand so hard that I was sure he was going to break it. His muffled screams were the only sound I heard.

“You’re doing great bud,” I spoke softly, “I have padding and gauze that I’m going to put onto it next, then I’m going to wrap it in one of my shirts. Keep biting onto that one for as long as you need.” This time, he opened his eyes, which were bright red from crying, and nodded. I took a couple of pads and pressed them to his leg, holding them in place while I started the gauze wrapping.

“I’m sorry I don’t have an ice pack or anything to help with the burning,” I said. He spat my shirt onto the ground and let out a small chuckle.

“Sorry? You just saved my life.” I took my long-sleeved plaid button-up and wrapped his leg in it, using the sleeves to tie it around his calf. He was still hyperventilating a little.

“Just rest for right now,” I instructed, “once you’re doing a little better, I’ll help you get back to your home base.” He tried to pull himself up to a sitting position, but I lightly pressed on his shoulders to let him know to lay back down, “Stay like that. Just focus on your breathing. I have some water, and I have food if you’re hungry.”

“What did you say your name was?” he asked me. I pulled my water bottle, which was about half-full, out of my bag.

“Vector,” I repeated. I scooted over to him and helped him lift his head enough to sip some water without choking on it. I took my knotted shirt and unknotted it, giving to him to wipe the tears and water off of his face. He rotated his head and looked up at me.

“Vector, why did you help me?” he asked, “you could’ve just killed me, saved your resources. Or taken my stuff and ran.” I squeezed his shoulder reassuringly.

“I took an oath,” I explained, “I’m a doctor. This is what I do.”

“How can I—“ a cough stopped him mid-sentence, “repay you? I can get you food, water, supplies. I have a community. Just say the word and whatever you want is yours.” I leaned back and grabbed my spear, which I had dropped on the way in, and collapsed it fully, rolling back and forth on the floor between my hands.

“Honestly, I could just use directions to a certain place, I must be close to it by now. I’m looking for a safe zone, it’s called—“

“Alexandria.”

I cocked my head at him, my words catching in my mouth and my facial expression displaying my shock. “How did you know that?”

“It’s the only one around here. We’re only a couple miles out” he laughed. Despite my protests earlier, he used his upper body to pull himself up into a sitting position, leaning back against some boxes, “I’m actually from there. I’m a recruiter. I go out with my partner Eric, and we search for survivors, like yourself, and see who would make useful additions to our community. And hell, we could definitely use you.”

I couldn’t believe my luck.

“I’ve been looking for Alexandria for months.”

© message below & 'continue reading' divider were created by me. Three-heart divider was created by @/enchanthings.

[aizawashuichi]

Chapter 12: The Astronomer of Light

Chapter 1: Prologue to Play Pretend Pattern

Fandom: Death Note (Anime & Manga) Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: L/OFC Tags: Slow Burn, Unresolved Emotional Tension, Identity Issues, Grief/Mourning, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, The Kira Case becomes irrelevant at some point, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Police Brutality, POV First Person, Violent Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Present Tense, Unreliable Narrator, Self-Hatred, OC-centric, and I mean it, L is a yearner, MC is a sucker, character-driven, Violence, Graphic Description, Gunshot Wounds

CHAPTER SUMMARY:

Guess who's back? Back again? Angler is back. Tell a friend.

TW: mention of self-harm (past and indirect) and scars, right at the beginning.

[goodomensafterdark]

Writers Guild Presents - Tethered, Chapter 15: Mirror

TW/CW: Angst, discussion of attempted suicide, implied character death, internalized homophobia, referenced conversion treatment, referenced child abuse, physical restraints, occasional light smut.

Summary:

Crowley wakes up in a mental hospital with no memory of how he got there. Without his demonic powers, neither the doctors, nor the people who claim to be his family will believe he is who he says he is. With the evidence against him mounting, his only lifeline to the real world is a cryptic note left by an unseen messenger. The longer he stays in this hospital, the harder it becomes to recall for sure, is Crowley really a demon of Hell? Or has his entire existence been nothing more than a delusion conjured by a grieving mind?

Excerpt:

“You alright, angel?” Crowley asked apprehensively, and when Aziraphale didn’t reply, he asked, “What’s wrong? What happened?”

That’s when he saw it, the little slip of paper Aziraphale held between his fingers. Crowley had seen it before, or one very much like it. Aziraphale passed it to him.

Crowley-Fell, Anthony J:

It is with deepest sorrow that we announce the sudden passing of  our dear friend, Anthony J Crowley- Fell, who was tragically taken from us too soon. He was a local entrepreneur and a pillar of the community. He issurvived by his husband and lifelong best friend Aziraphale Z Crowley-Fell, …

“Fuck,” said Crowley eloquently, dropping his face into his hands.

Continue reading on AO3 Or start from chapter 1 - Dies Lunae

Thank you to my beautiful betas u/paperclip_ninja and u/blackjeans93

[livlaughlove07]

Long Time, No See (Part Two)

Tags: Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Shane's Six-Heart Event (Stardew Valley), Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Suicide Attempt, Self-Destruction, Self-Hatred, completed fic, Complete

TW: SH, Suicidal Ideation/Attempt, Mentions of Death

Shane crosses the barrier of Cinder Sap forest. The weight of the grief still hangs around his shoulders. No matter how long he kept crying, nothing could remove this burden from him.

Although, being almost black out drunk made the load a lot lighter.

Deep inside, Shane recognizes the fact that he can’t do this any longer. It took longer for him to get drunk now. It took longer for him to regain feeling in the morning. He lost his empathy a while ago.

He knew it’s his fault. He put himself in this predicament. No one else did. Well, except maybe Jaime and Matthew, but he couldn’t place his anger on the dead any more. It wasn’t fair to them, two rays of sunshine, crumpled between Shane’s anger and metal.

Shane’s own lack of responsibility put him here. He was determined to take himself out of it. He knew what he had to do. Shane ducked into Marnie’s quickly. He thanked Yoba that she was asleep, even though he didn’t care about any religion. He didn’t think he could handle Marnie’s misplaced love in a state like this.

While he was there, he decided to take some things from his room and leave them elsewhere. His gaming console? He placed it in front of Jas’ door, hoping that she’d find it in the morning. It felt wrong leaving it, but it was even worse untouched in his room. He gave Marnie a few books about chickens. He’d been reading them lately, and even started breeding a batch of white hens that had a slight blue hue to them. Hopefully, Marnie could read this and continue his work. Maybe it would be the only lasting good impression Shane would ever make in this goddamned world.

After he was done with being the world’s worst santa, he ducked out of the farmhouse, 32-pack in hand. Yeah, it was warm by now. But warm beer still gets you drunk, so Shane couldn’t really complain. Not like it was gonna matter in a few hours. He’d really perfected the art of not giving a fuck. Couldn’t help but feel a slight burn of pride at this accomplishment.

Shane finally arrived at his destination. The little spot in the woods that he’d become very acquainted with over the last few weeks. For what it’s worth, Shane did feel a little happy seeing as he’d picked such a scenic spot. One of the few things he had gotten right in the last decade of his life.

He almost could feel a sense of calm. It almost felt like a weight in his chest shifted. Almost. Ignoring it, he sloppily tore the cardboard container open and fished out a can. He struggled opening it, the tab kept slipping from his grasp; and eventually he got a nail hooked onto it. He popped the tab, wincing at the pull on his fingernail. He guessed that he bit them too far down again. The pain was still warmly welcomed, a distinct reminder that he could feel.

He had tested the extent of his numbness before. Working at Joja had its advantages after all. He had a company issued box cutter that he kept handy in his cargo short’s pockets. One day, he tested its sharpness on his forearms.

It glided smoothly along, silently slicing through the skin and dense hair he had. He couldn’t feel the cut until crimson started pooling along the line he had just traced. The slight tingle of the pain wasn’t enough. It barely felt like anything compared to the pain he was already going through every day.

So he did it again. And again. But it never felt different. So he gave up, put it away, and carried on. Marnie noticed, promptly chastised him, and wouldn’t move on. So Shane picked it back up, swearing that no one would find out this time.

He tried different areas. First above his thighs, but it got hard to hide them whenever he’d make a move on some random chick. They all got super turned off when they saw this man that looked like he fucked razor blades for fun.

So he let that area heal up too, and turned his attention to his stomach. Perfectly tender, and secret enough that nobody would notice or care. He only removed his shirt alone, or facing the wall at Joja Mart when he had to change into that stupid ass onesie for work.

What shocked him the most was that it never left any marks. After the marks healed, there were no scars. Nothing was left as a reminder of how he desecrated himself. It was such an odd feeling. If no one had noticed his arms or thighs before, they wouldn’t have known anything was wrong with him.

Shane couldn’t even cut himself right. So many people that had cut themselves before had scars peppering their arms and thighs and wherever else they had cut. But Shane didn’t. He couldn’t even be fucking depressed right.

Again, he couldn’t help but laugh at himself. At the absolute joke he had become. He’d spent the last part of his life doing everything wrong. Couldn’t cut right, couldn’t live right, couldn’t parent right, couldn’t employee right. Honestly, he was just so obviously a dead weight.

But now. Now he was going to fix it all. He had one chance to finally start to fix what he had broken. He could finally let Jas grow up in peace. Let Marnie live out her life in peace. Let Morris lower his blood pressure. He finally knew he had a choice, and he was going to make the right one.

For once in his goddamned, miserable, mistake of a life; he was going to do something right.

He took one last swig of his can. He crinkled it in his hands, and threw it onto the pile of 31 other cans. At this point, his limbs were too heavy to even attempt to stand up. It was okay though, he didn’t need to stands for this. He focused all his will into his hands. Shane forced his hand into his pocket, fishing out the trusty box cutter.

Where it once shone in the light, it had now rusted over and dulled. He didn’t care, it still cut.

Shane lifted his shirt once again, and revealed his wounds to the world. He took the box cutter, and made one final round of cuts. They weeped red tears onto his skin and the knife. A familiar rush of adrenaline got to his head, giving Shane a sense of false hubris.

He used his free hand to spread the new cuts, deepening the slits. He winced at it, but gave the biggest, dopiest smile he had given in months. He dropped his shirt, proud of his final handiwork. He rolled himself to two feet before the edge of the cliff. It was the cliff that separated the Cindersap Forest from the rocky ocean below.

He could hear the waves lapping at the edge below him. It grounded him to his decision. While still distant, he knew it was his fate. This was his final chance to do something good. For once. He couldn’t stay selfish forever.

Shane’s vision wavered as he rethought his perfect plan again and again. He couldn’t hear the footsteps that were approaching him till they were right in front of his face.

Ugh. That stupid farmer. They kept trying to butt into his life. Couldn’t they see that he was doing something? Something important?

Whatever.

They couldn’t stop him now. In fact, they gave him more energy to finally follow through.

Shane lifted his head, and started to roll again. Nothing was going to stop him, especially not this stupid new farmer. It’s a shame though. The farmer is going to be the last one to see him alive. That’s a disappointment. Oh well, it’s for the greater good.

He kept rolling, until something caught him. A stick or something was poking out of the ground caught his stomach, inflaming the dull pain that was there.

He felt around, trying to remove it, only to realize it was the farmers handle of their pickaxe.

“LET ME GO,” Shane screamed. Angry tears welled up in his eyes. They’re seriously not trying to stop him. Now of all times.

“LET ME GO, YOU ABSOLUTE BASTARD. LET ME HAVE THIS. I SWEAR TO YOBA THAT I’M GOING TO DO THIS. YOU CAN’T STOP ME. LET. ME. GO,” he roars, fury hot on his breath.

The farmer, with tears rolling down their face, pulls on their pickaxe. Shane cries out in searing white-hot pain. They managed to pull him a good two feet from the edge that he was just dangling off of.

Shane monologues, “I… I’m sorry… hic M…My life… It’s a pathetic joke… Look at me… Why do I even try? …sob… I’m too small and stupid to try to… to take control of my life. I’ve been coming here often recently and looking down… Here’s a chance to finally control my life… These cliffs… B… bu… blaap… but I’m too scared, too anxious. Just like always. [PLAYER NAME], all I do is work, sleep, and drink …t… to dull the feelings of self hatred. Why should I even go on? Tell me… T… Tell me why I shouldn’t roll off this cliff right now.”

The farmer just stare at him. Anxiously, they shift the handle even further away from the cliff. The silence is both worrisome and comfort ing, at least to Shane. But he wishes they would just get on with it. He’s made up his mind, and this was only slowing him down.

Finally, the farmer reaches a hand out and places it on Shane’s shoulder.

“…The decision is your own. But just know that I’m here for you. No matter what. Maybe you don’t realize it, but people care about you, no matter what you do.”

What. The. Fuck. How the fuck was Shane supposed to respond to that? Here comes the stupid farmer, and now he wants to abandon this plan? For them? Bullshit. Shane’s will was supposed to be stronger than this. He couldn’t take it any longer.

His plan dissipated on the spot. His muscles relaxed.

He muttered, “Thanks…I appreciate that. I really do,” and flopped his head on the ground.

Black flashed before his eyes, but his eyes remained open. The seriousness of the situation flashed before Shane.

He let out a, “…I think you should take me to the hospital now,” and then blacked out.

Part One Here

[ao3feed-brucewayne]

Got a Case of a Love Bipolar

by TimDrakeIsMyPatronus There it was. They thought that he was crazy – that he was broken.   OR How Tim gets diagnosed with bipolar disorder. TW inside Words: 7113, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Series: Part 1 of Bipolar Timmy Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types, Batman (Comics) Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: Gen Characters: Tim Drake (DCU), Stephanie Brown, Leslie Thompkins, Bruce Wayne, Dick Grayson, Alfred Pennyworth, Jason Todd, Cassandra Cain Relationships: Past Stephanie Brown/Tim Drake - Relationship, Stephanie Brown & Tim Drake, Tim Drake & Bruce Wayne, Batfamily Members & Tim Drake (DCU) Additional Tags: Tim Drake Needs a Hug (DCU), Tim Drake Has Mental Health Issues (DCU), Bipolar Tim Drake, Bipolar Disorder, Manic Episode, Inappropriate Behavior, Tim Drake Needs Help, Stephanie Brown Needs a Hug, BAMF Stephanie Brown, Suicide Attempt, Hospitals, BAMF Leslie Thompkins, Good Parent Bruce Wayne, Good Sibling Dick Grayson, Good Sibling Jason Todd, Good Sibling Cassandra Cain, Suicidal Thoughts, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Tim Drake Needs Therapy, Sleep Deprivation, Insomnia via https://ift.tt/XP52HGD

[cramberry24]

I Am No Mother, I Am No Bride, I Am King

It’s update day! We’ve got…a lot to unpack.

Chapter 16: Now I’ve Got That Feeling Once Again, I Can’t Explain, You Would Not Understand

Pairing: Robert Zussman/OFC

Tags: 18+ Minors DNI, Explicit Language, Hurt/Comfort, Canon-Typical Violence, Period Typical Attitudes, Historical References, Historical Inaccuracy, War, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Medical Inaccuracies, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst, Fluff, Friendship, Period-Typical Sexism, Idiots in Love, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Implied/Referenced Sexual Harassment, Period-Typical Racism, Period-Typical Homophobia, Feminist Themes, Queer Themes, Survivor Guilt, Self-Esteem Issues, Blood and Gore, Graphic Description of Corpses, Protective Robert Zussman, Trauma, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Choking, Buried Alive, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Denial of Feelings, Misunderstandings, Yearning, Mutual Pining, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, no beta we die like, well you know, Implied/Referenced Domestic Violence, Panic Attacks, Anxiety Attacks, Suicide Attempt, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms

Summary: Aachen was supposed to be bad - they lost so many taking that city. It doesn’t take them long to realize the Death Factory is going to be much, much worse. OR Eve adds on to her list of traumatic experiences, Zussman gets drafted into the army's habit of secret-keeping, Red gets big news, and the gang goes for a stroll through the woods.

Chapter specific warnings/TW: Suicide, please tread carefully

Snippet under the cut, its actually not the beginning of the chapter like usual but instead somewhere in the middle (just felt right), full chapter linked in title above

“Angel, you’ll never believe - what are you doing?”

Eve turns, tilting her head at Robbie as he stops in front of her.  His hair looks especially fluffy today - focus.  Aiello and Stiles are trailing along behind him, the New Yorker snapping at a muttering Stiles.  Luna, cradled in Eve’s arms belly up, perks her head up at Robbie’s voice, tail thumping against Eve’s torso.  He absent-mindedly gives her a scratch behind her ears, still staring at Eve quizzically.

“We’re seein’ how long she can hold Lady for,” Woods pipes up, answering Robbie’s question.  Her squad is lounging around the fire, a fresh pot of coffee brewing.

“Why?”

“Want to know,” Marsh grunts out, shifting on the tree stump he’s sitting on. “Nothin’ better to do.”

“Why?” he asks again, focusing on Eve again this time, and she shrugs.  It’s entertaining the boys, so why not.  Everyone’s content, everyone’s safe.

“So far she’s at thirty-seven minutes,” Lowe says, checking his watch. “Which means OK is out, he bet thirty-five minutes.”

“You wanna get in on it, Zuss?” Woods asks.

“No.”

“Aw, c’mon-“

“I’m not betting on O’Shea.  Besides, we’ll probably get pulled for a patrol before she gets tired and drops her.”

Eve inclines her head.  Honestly, that’s the best answer anyone’s given.  Shame he won’t put money or a pack of cigs on it.

“What am I not gonna believe?” she asks, getting back to what drew her attention in the first place.  Robbie’s eyes spark and he opens his mouth.

“Daniels is gonna be a daddy!”

Aiello speaks before he can even utter a word, and Robbie whips around, smacks the back of his helmet.  Aiello swats back at him as he moves for a cup of coffee.

Eve nearly drops the damn dog.

“What?”

Robbie faces forward again, former irritation trading in for glee. “Hazel’s pregnant!”

“Hazel’s pregnant?”

Unable to gesticulate, arms full of Luna, she begins to pace in front of her friend. “Oh, my God.  That’s what the letter was about.  Christ in heaven, she’s pregnant?  Goddamn.  What a fuckin’ letter.  Red?  A dad?  Fuck, he’s barely an adult!”

Robbie laughs. “He’s only two years younger than us, angel.”

Eve hums distractedly.  Even though she was confident Hazel wasn’t calling it quits, she was still expecting bad news.  Hell, anytime she’s gotten a serious letter, it’s because someone’s died.  The opposite of death is really throwing her for a loop.

“That’s…fuck, that’s big.  How’s Red takin’ it?”

Robbie wilts a bit, genuine concern flooding his expression. “Think he’s gotta take some time, process it.  Hell of a letter to open, ya know?”

Red’s become more sullen and snappish with each passing day, still his usual self mostly, just dulled down and tired.  This is probably either going to make him worse, or make him better.

“We’re gonna have to pull overtime to make sure farm boy makes it back home,” Robbie jokes, and Eve snorts, rolls her eyes.

“Knowing him, he won’t make it easy for us.”

“This kiddo’s gonna hear all about how Uncle Rob saved his dad’s life and dragged his ass back home at the end of the war.”

That gets an actual laugh out of Eve and she shakes her head, Luna wriggling in her arms.  Robbie grins, eyes warm, bumping his shoulder against hers.  Being in the forest and surrounded by trees and plant life - what hasn’t been destroyed, at least - only highlights his irises, much to Eve’s frustration.  It makes it that much harder not to just sit and stare.

“Can’t believe Red’s gonna be a dad,” Rojas says.  OK echoes his agreement from where he’s bent over practicing his letters, Lowe quietly offering corrections.

“He’s gonna be great,” Eve states. “Remember that little French girl?  She adored him, and he was so gentle with her.”

“What do you think they’re gonna name ‘im?” Lowe asks.

“Him?  What if they have a girl?” Woods replies, scraping at his tin of food.  The lanky man is always eating, but no matter how much he vacuums up, he always remains skinny as a beanpole.

“That baby’s gon’ be a Ronald Daniels Junior, mark my words-“

“My gut says a baby girl-“

“Sarge, what does your womanly intuition tell ya?”

“Womanly intuition?” Eve repeats, a smile on her face despite herself.  Robbie barks out a laugh.

“Stiles, smack him for me.”

“Hey, wait-“

Stiles dodges Robbie’s deflections, hitting the back of his head with a nice smack.

“What the hell does she know about bein’ a woman?” Aiello grunts out. “She’s more of a man than half the bastards in the company.”

Her boys immediately start protesting and yelling at him.  Eve bites her lip, fingers digging into Luna’s fur.  He’s not wrong, exactly.  Eve’s never been the best at being lady-like.  Never managed to fit in with what the world decided a woman should be.

“Don’t listen to ‘im, angel,” Robbie says, catching her eye and grinning slyly. “You’re as womanly as they come.  I mean, do I really need to bring up Marigny again-?”

“You bastard.” She kicks his shin, scowling, watching him wince and yelp. “I told you to never bring that up again, Christ!  You swore!  You swore you wouldn’t mention it again!”

“Mention what?”

“Nothing!”

Robbie shoves at her, laughing now, and she nearly tumbles over.  Luna squirms as Eve tries to rebalance herself.

“You fucker-!”

“Shit, Davis is coming-“

At Stiles’ hushes warning, the platoon quickly straightens, their banter falling silent.  Eve drops the dog, Luna landing on her feet and shaking.  The scrap of red, white, and blue fabric - more a bandana, really - twists around her neck as she sits and scratches at it.

“Everyone gather round!” Turner calls out, and more men from the platoon begin to shuffle over.

“Where’s Daniels?” Stiles hisses out.  Robbie’s already on his way over to the tent to grab their friend.  Eve watches as Pierson glares at his back before turning his scowling expression on her.  Great.  Pierson’s in a wonderful mood.  She scrunches her face up back at him, resists the urge to stick out her tongue, and his scowl deepens as he looks away.

Davis is blunt and gruff as always as he explains their mission to them today - take Hill 493, or die trying.  Eve tunes out the rest of his speech - she hates these infuriating spiels.  They’re so obviously fake, but it still helps some of the men, or maybe it just makes them feel better.  Whatever.  Eve had spent the early morning being briefed with Turner and Pierson, fighting against the clawing despair and fear in her throat.  Every day gets worse and worse, but the Germans won’t fall back, won’t give so much as an inch.  It’s pissing off command, and if they get pissed off, they take it out on the officers, the noncoms, the grunts, push them even harder, become desperate with their attacks.  She’s heard that the Russians have orders to shoot men who don’t push forward in battle - she wonders how close command is to relaying similar orders, because they’re making it pretty damn clear that failure is not an option.

“No mission too difficult.  No sacrifice too great.” Turner doesn’t sound any more enthused than Eve feels. “Duty first.”

“I can’t hear you!” Davis barks, and Eve nearly winces.  Yeah, the higher ups are pissed.

“No mission too difficult, no sacrifice too great!  Duty first!”

Turner’s second try seems to satisfy the colonel, and he nods his head once.

“That’s right.  Now, get ready to move out!”

Robbie turns, makes a face at Red and Eve.

“Duty first.  Back to the ole meat grinder.”

“Amen, brother.”

Eve wrinkles her nose. “Please don’t call it a meat grinder.  Ugh, duty first.  Feel like I’m home again, with my ma.  Aoibheann, stop complaining.  There’s work to do.  You’ll rest when you’re dead.”

The boys laugh at the Irish lilt she adds to her tone.  She grins, ignores the pang of homesickness in her heart.  What she’d give to hear her mom’s voice just one more time.

[insoukokuhell-434]

Chuuya Takes Care of Dazai Fics

Includes:

Emotional Hurt/Comfort (long term & immediate)

Physical Hurt/Comfort

The format I’m using is:

Title - writer (ao3 link) Fic length Time period (teen/mafia skk, 22! Skk, all ages) Additional tags (Tags in bold added by me for extra info) TW

Some fics have parts of the summary/ comments added for additional info

Emotional Hurt/Comfort

Long Term (multiple instances)

hey look, the sky's falling apart - saffroncassis    

24.8k TEEN SKK (16/17) AU - Canon Divergence Protective Nakahara Chuuya, Angst, Fluff, Humor, Developing Relationship Found Family (the Akutagawa siblings, Oda's kids, Kyouka, Oda, Ango) TW- Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse and discussions of both these, also cw food for the whole fic

Summary - "At age 16, Chuuya defects from the Port Mafia and drags his partner with him not so much kicking and screaming as silently begrudging, and the rest follow suit in time."

Mostly Chuuya helping Dazai, but Dazai supports him too <33

[Really realistic depiction of the relationship between a depressed person and their supportive partner!]

For the Record - zombiemarker

19.1k TEEN SKK  AU- Spies & Secret Agents + Physical Hurt/Comfort Nightmares, Childhood Trauma, they get all dressed up and go to a gala, Implied Sexual Content, Fluff & Angst, Literal sleeping together, Getting together, First kiss, Developing Relationship TW - Blood and Violence, Childhood Trauma

From tags: "Chuuya's a government experiment, Dazai's been with Mori for years, they've both got trauma now"

Mostly Chuuya helping Dazai, but Dazai supports him too <33

A mouth to empty into - series by osamuchuu

Not listing all 4 fics cause this post is already so long, but they’re all amazing pls go read them!

The series depicts depression + CSA trauma so well!

This is my favourite -

Love is not a victory march - osamuchuu

8.7k 22 SKK Soukoku taking care of each other, Angst, Fluff and Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Mental Illness, Depression, Drug Addiction, Blood and Injury, Healing, Recovery, Soukoku Tenderness, Light Angst TW -  Dazai-Typical Suicide References and Attempts, Addiction, Drug Use

believe me darling, the stars were made for falling -communist_sasuke

14.6k ALL AGES Worried Chuuya, Love Confessions, Dazai is a Mess, Angst, Self-Harm , Fluff & Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon timeline, First Kiss, TW - Dazai-Typical Suicide Mentions , Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt

Trust Fall - insi 

3.5k ALL AGES (Dark Era, Post-Dark Era, 22 SKK) Emotional Constipation, Mental Health Issues, Dazai has issues TW - Implied/Referenced Suicide & Self-Harm, Suicidal ideation

From tags: Chuuya has met Dazai on the rooftop many times throughout knowing each other.

Immediate

Emotional H/C

Even the Darkness We're Watching Is So Beautiful - NastyaEx

4k 22 SKK (post-109) bsd 109, Fluff, Dazai Needs a Hug, Dazai is a Mess, exhausted dazai, dazai cries but only a little bit, Cuddling & Snuggling, Sharing a Bed, Soft skk, Dazai centered, yosano is a bit here and she's great

I'll Make A Home In Your Gut Because its Somewhere Warm to Sleep - arahabakii

8.9k 22 SKK Fluff, Angst, Mutual Pining, Feelings Realization, First Kiss, Making Out, Getting Together, Domestic Fluff, Touch-Starved Dazai, Dazai needs a hug, Chuuya needs a hug TW - Dazai-Typical Suicide References

stay- neon_toad

4.6k 22 SKK (pm!skk flashbacks) Suffering Dazai, Dazai Needs a Hug , Dazai is Bad at Feelings, Oblivious Dazai Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Hugs, birthday, Birthday Presents, soft skk TW - Dazai-Typical Suicide References

where are you? - doeinstinct

2.8k 22 SKK Depression, Disordered Eating, physical symptoms of depression, Mentions of past self harm, m because they shower together, canon adjacent, meal replacements, Love Confessions, They're In Love Your Honor

Run Away With Me - Anonymous

5.3k Dark Era Grief/Mourning, Dissociation, Suicidal Thoughts, Soft Soukoku, Dazai Needs a Hug , Dazai Has Feelings, Pining, Cuddling & Snuggling, Sharing a Bed, Chuuya Needs a Hug, Kissing, Dazai asks Chuuya to run away with him

stay the night - Shinkirou

3.6k 22 SKK Gen or Pre-Slash, Developing Relationship, Character Study, Sharing a Bed, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Dazai's depression

Physical Hurt/Comfort

Fool for loyalty, or some other word - osamuchuu

1.7k Dark Era Aftermath of Torture, Blood and Injury Light Angst, chuuya deals with so much tbh, what a champ, Fluff and Angst, Pre-Relationship, Established Relationship, chuuya being Dazai's nurse because he absolutely was Dazai's angry nurse

under wraps - Coffeebiscuits

5k Post-Dark era + Emotional hurt comfort Love confessions, deep talks, Light angst, Fluff and angst, kissing, crushes, sharing a bed, Suicide, Self-Harm, Tending to Wounds TW - Dazai-Typical Suicide Mentions, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm 

From tags: “basically chuuya has to patch dazai upand they talk about some things they need to discuss”

Chuuya also gets some emotional comfort

EXHAUSTION

So if you go too far I'll be there - Kimisu

2.5k 22 SKK - Pre-Fyodor | Cannibalism Arc  No Plot/Plotless, Literal Sleeping Together, Some Fluff, Canon Timeline

From Summary: Based on a HC that Dazai spends days before every major arc planning and arranging the pieces in order for everything to 'work'. He also pushes his body limits a bit too far when doing that sometimes.

SICK FIC

Nothing More Important Than You - StormDew2

3k MAFIA SKK (15) Sickfic, Soft soukoku, Vulnerability

Please like/reblog if this helped u find a fic, I'd be delighted to know asjsj <3

“Dazai takes care of Chuuya” recs here

Fic rec masterlist here

[dixonsdarkelf]

Finding Myself, Finding You: Chapter Two

Main masterlist Series masterlist AO3 link Wattpad link

Story is 18+ for mature content/themes, minors do not interact please

TW/CWs for this story--implied/referenced past rape, canonical violence, non-canonical violence, blood, gore, referenced past suicide, swearing, surgery, excessive drinking, nightmares, vomiting, amputation, medical procedures, non-con medical procedures, referenced past medical torture, referenced past drugging, attempted sexual assault, panic attacks, mental health struggles, referenced sibling death, referenced parent death

Each chapter will have its own TW/CWs listed

This story, Lydia Vector, her family & bestie (c) me, dixonsdarkelf

TWD & its characters (c) AMC & Robert Kirkman, the writer of the comic series

TW/CWs for this chapter--swearing, mention of amputation

Word count: 2.1k

Aaron and I stayed in that shed for probably two hours. He told me about his S.O. Eric and how they got separated, how he hoped that Eric had made it back safely. He told me about some of the people in Alexandria, how this large group of ragtag misfits had come together to form one giant family. There was power and water and food and shelter.

Alexandria sounded like a dream.

At some point, he took a lengthy nap, which I used as time to write. During my residency and throughout this last year and a half, the only hobby I had & thing that managed to keep me semi-sane was writing. I came to love writing poetry in med school & had journals upon journals filled to the brim with my work stuffed into my bedroom closet on a small shelf. I wish I could have brought even a few of them with me.

After he woke up, I gave him some more of my water and a little bit of my food. He pulled at the corner of the silver bag, stopping to read the text on the front.

“Is this fucking freeze-dried ice cream?” Aaron asked, laughing as he tore the corner off the bag.

“My dad was an astronaut. You don’t wanna know how much of that shit was stacked in closets in his office. I took all that would fit into my backpack before I started making my way out here,” I responded. He pulled the small, hard Neapolitan brick out of the bag, taking a bite out of the corner.

“Can I be frank?”

“Yeah, of course.”

“This tastes like shit,” he chuckled. I laughed in response.

“It does, but it’s food. I’ve been living off of that for the last year and a half. And any random cans I’ve found along the way,” I said, “I haven’t kept track of time, but it feels like it’s been months since I had food that wasn’t freeze-dried.”

“Well, once we get back, we’ll get you taken care of,” he told me. I suppressed my squee of joy and instead let it spread across my face in a gigantic grin.

After a little more time talking, he seemed like he had gotten enough strength back to slowly head back to Alexandria. I grabbed my spear and put it under my arm, propping myself up onto my feet.

“Alright, we’re gonna get you on your…” I caught the word I was going to say in my mouth, “foot…and take as long as we need to get back. Is there any chance some people could be sent out looking for you?” I put my arm around him again, and he put his weight onto his foot to push himself into a standing position. He then distributed his weight between his foot and on me.

“I mean, there’s a chance, but only if Eric made it back and told them what happened,” he told me. I unsheathed my spear to use as a walking stick, the sharp end pointing to the sky. We hobbled slowly to the door, and I had him stop and rest on a table.

“Let me make sure it’s clear.” I swung the door open and walked the perimeter of the small shed, listening and making sure there weren’t any Walkers nearby. I found a large stick on the ground for Aaron to use, picking it up and bringing it back to him. “Here, use this.” He took it in his free hand and gave me a nod. I grabbed him again, and after slipping through the door, I let him lead the way to the road.

“So you’ve obviously got medical skills. What’s your combat experience like?”

We hobbled along the road, me telling him about my brothers and my family and how I’d been alone all this time. Never had a group. There was the occasional Walker, which I would take care of with my spear. It was a peaceful walk for the most part.

After a couple of hours, I could see a wall through the trees. Aaron’s face lit up, as did mine. The two people on either side of what I assumed was the front gate raised their guns in our direction, keeping them poised. After we were out of the trees, they dropped their weapons when they realized it was Aaron.

“He’s back!” one of them shouted. One of them signaled to someone I couldn’t see, and they started opening the gate. A blonde man slipped through the small gap in the gate like butter and began running over.

“Eric!” Aaron yelled, starting to pick up his pace a little. Eric ran over at mach speed, embracing Aaron in a vice grip the second they touched. I pushed forward on Aaron to keep both of them from falling over. One of the two started making their way towards us, the other walking off towards the side to the trees. I was so enamored by Eric and Aaron that I didn’t even see him coming up behind me.

“No, no she’s with me!” Aaron screamed behind him. Before I could fully process what was happening, the back of my head was struck, the pain vibrating across my face and down my neck. I could feel myself falling forward, and everything turned black before I hit the ground.

I slowly opened my eyes. Wherever I was was very bright, and the light was blinding. The back of my head was pulsating, each throb matching my heartbeat. I was sat upright, I could tell that much. After several rounds of blinking, I was able to open my eyes.

“She’s awake,” I heard a man’s voice say. It took a moment for my eyes to focus, but when they did, I realized I was in some kind of small cell. The first thing I noticed was a man sitting in front of me. He was leaned back in a chair, one leg propped up onto the other. He looked cool as a cucumber as he held his crossbow up, pointed right at me.

His voice was like gravel in my ears. And I liked it.

I practically fell over jumping up to my feet, putting my hands up at my sides. I backed up into the far corner. Looking around the room, I saw a few more people come in, each one taking a seat either in a chair or on a set of steps.

“Ya got other weapons on ya, sunshine?” the man with the crossbow asked me. I chuckled a little. I was wearing a black cropped tank and a skort where a portion of the front skirt part was missing. My clothes were small and fitted, so I don’t know where else they thought I could store a weapon.

“Look at me,” I said, shaking my hips a little and twirling in a circle, “where could I possibly store another weapon, up my p—“

The three women in the group giggled at my comment. “Shut up and sit down,” another man instructed. This one was wearing a cowboy hat and had a star-shaped badge pinned to his chest. The way this man spoke indicated that he was some sort of authority figure in this group.

“Could call it a pussy knife,” I said under my breath as I sat down on the small bench against the back wall of the cell.

“You’re gonna start with telling us who you are and what happened to Aaron,” he instructed. I leaned back and folded my arms across my chest, examining the group. There was the one with the crossbow, the sheriff with an attitude, a woman with grey hair, an Asian guy, another woman with short hair who looked around my age or a little older, and a Black woman with dreads, probably also not much older than me.

“What’s your name, cowboy?” I asked the sheriff, sass lacing my voice, “y’know, so I can address you properly.”

“Rick,” he told me, “Rick Grimes.”

“Well Rick, have you talked to Aaron yet?”

“You’ll give us your story first, then we’ll make sure it matches his.”

“Can I have my stuff back?”

“You might get it back, depending on whether or not I like your answer.” I met his gaze and sighed.

Fuck cops.

“I’m Vector, and I think I’m 32, depending on what month it is. I’m a trauma surgeon. Well, I had a month left of my residency when…all of this started. I was at Johns Hopkins for my residency and going home to see family for vacation. I had hardly left the hospital when people started evacuating. I decided to drive all the way back home where I found out that one of brothers had already lost his life. I, umm…”

I paused, trying to find my wording without letting my emotions get the best of me, “had to put him out of his misery. After some wandering, I found out about Alexandria, and…here I am. Got lucky enough to find Aaron. He got bit, by the way. I had just woken up and he was getting attacked nearby, which I saved him from. You’re welcome. I carry medical supplies on me, so I got him to safety, amputated his foot, patched him up, and here we are.”

“He said you gave him food and water?” Rick said. I rolled my eyes and huffed.

“So you have talked to him?” I scoffed, “and yes I did. I could’ve just killed him, or taken his stuff and ran, but I didn’t. Because I’m a doctor, and he needed help. That’s what I do.” There was a silence that hovered over us for what felt like ages. It felt like they were reading me, trying to gauge whether or not I was telling the truth. Meanwhile, the one with the crossbow hadn’t let up once.

“What kind of doctor did you say you were?” the woman with the grey hair asked.

“I’m a trauma surgeon. I was working in the ER before all this. I amputated limbs, put limbs back on, did organ transplants. I saw gunshot wounds, third-degree burns. You name it, I’ve probably done it,” I explained, “actually, my plan after completing my residency and getting a few years under my belt was to eventually join Doctors Without Borders, but now we’re here.”

“That’s uh…wow, that’s really commendable,” Rick stated, a small smile crossing his face. I nodded. “Do you have a group that would be looking for you?”

“No, I’ve never had a group. Just me, the pack on my back, and my own thoughts,” I explained, pointing to my head. The group looked surprised by what I said.

“You’ve survived by yourself this whole time?” he asked me, sounding surprised. I nodded.

“Never wanted to join anyone. I had my heart set on Alexandria from the moment I heard about it. Sometimes I would come across people, like I did Aaron, and I would offer my medical services and take off. Never really stuck around one place for too long.”

“Well that’s very trusting of you,” Rick commented, “how has that worked out?” I bit my lip to keep myself from wincing at the memories from that day.

“Well, for the most part,” I said. I rubbed at the rope scars on my wrists in a way that I hoped was discreet, “I mean, I’ve made it this long on my own, right?”

“What are your combat skills like?” he questioned. I had to suppress my laughter.

“I grew up with three older brothers…all Navy SEALs…they taught me everything they knew.” I leaned forward between the bars, locking eyes with Rick. “I’ll let you guess how my combat skills are.” The man with the crossbow made a face, though I couldn’t decipher what it meant. Rick seemed to take notice.

“Would you like her to demonstrate, Daryl?”

“Yeah, would you like me to demonstrate, Daryl?” I smirked, “I could kick you in the balls, bring you to your knees, and knee you in the face. Don’t need to be a Navy SEAL to know how to do that.”

“I like her,” the woman with the short hair said, laughing.

“Ya just tiny s’all,” Daryl commented. His Southern drawl and gravel-laced voice made me weak, though I didn’t let it show.

“I’m like 5’7”, I am not tiny,” I retorted, “and can you tell him to stop pointing that thing at me? I’m clearly not going to hurt anyone from in here.” Rick nodded to Daryl, who finally lowered his bow. “Thank you.” He then turned to the Asian man to his left, who got up and came over toward my cell, unlocking it and swinging the door open. I hesitated for a moment before stepping out, scanning my eyes across the group.

“Sooooo…does this mean I get to stay?” I asked, a small but enthusiastic smile crossing my face, “I promise I’ll be useful. Sassy, but useful.”

“Yes,” Rick said, “Welcome to Alexandria.”

© message below & 'continue reading' divider were created by me. Three-heart divider was created by @/enchanthings.

[aizawashuichi]

Chapter 13: Sunday, Before Four

Chapter 1: Prologue to Play Pretend Pattern

Fandom: Death Note (Anime & Manga) Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: L/OFC Tags: Slow Burn, Unresolved Emotional Tension, Identity Issues, Grief/Mourning, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, The Kira Case becomes irrelevant at some point, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Police Brutality, POV First Person, Violent Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Present Tense, Unreliable Narrator, Self-Hatred, OC-centric, and I mean it, L is a yearner, MC is a sucker, character-driven, Violence, Graphic Description, Gunshot Wounds

CHAPTER SUMMARY:

Dichotomies and parallels.

TW: graphic description of gunshot wound and mass shooting in a mall.

Note:

Can I be unashamedly proud of how I wrote the whole gunshot wound part for a sec? lmao

[scribblertown]

Fates of the Fateless Masterlist

A time travel Arthur Morgan x Reader Romance (Ongoing)

Browsing the many articles and advertisements that described an incredibly dated way of life. And as much as you tried to convince yourself of all the excuses to explain your twisted journey up to this point. The number 1891 burned in your mind with a sickly feeling this wasn’t any sort of rural community.

All our fates are intertwined, but it seems yours needed a slight shift several hundred years into the past. A time travel romance Inspired by "A Single Frayed Rope" by thejamesoldier

Updates are sporadic due to school, work, and cycling hyperfixations.

ao3 wattpad

This story is mature so obviously expect mature themes.

TW: Sexual assault, sexism, misogyny, attempted rape/non-con, violence against women, graphic depictions of violence/corpses/gore, verbal abuse, physical abuse, implications of rape/non-con, implied/referenced suicide, thoughts of suicide (will add to as needed).

Chapter 1: A Slight Shift

Chapter 2: First impressions Matter

Chapter 3: But Second Impressions are What Really Matter

Chapter 4: Suspicions in Sarsaparilla

Chapter 5: A Broken Mystery (Camp Interaction)

Chapter 6: New Faces New Places and a Horse

Chapter 7: Idle Gossips (Camp Interaction)

Chapter 8: Welcome Party, Unwelcome Discovery

Chapter 9: Outlaw's Staple (Camp Interaction)

Chapter 10: Service with a Grimace

Chapter 11: Got some Dirt in your Eye (TW)

[miscellaneoussmp]

QSMP Fic List!

Posted!

•They're Family: A possible return of the eggs and how that goes

•First time (Second time): Pac cleans up the lab and thinks. (cw/tw: blood mentions throughout)

•A Nightmare Maybe: Tubbo, Roier, and Charlie don't want to face their feelings. (cw/tw: egg death mentioned/implied throughout and blood mentions)

•Hospital Room Conversations: Cellbit and Pac talk. (cw/tw: blood mention, and general Pac trauma)

•Family Dinner: Dinner at Cellbit and Roier's castle and how that goes.

•Brother and Sister: A collection of (lost) memories Cellbit and Bagi might share. (cw/tw: blood/violence/death mentions, general Cellbit fuckery. A singular mention of throwing up)

•Two Souls: The story of The Grim Reaper meeting a set of twins. (cw/tw: blood/violence/death mentions, general Cellbit fuckery)

•Heavy machinery + sleep deprivation: Pac and Tubbo need sleep. Luckily, Fit is there to tell them to go to bed.

•One Reaper: The story of a set of twins meeting The Grim Reaper. (cw/tw: blood/violence/death throughout, general Cellbit fuckery)

•Escape Plan: Three girls, a train, a plane, and a ship

•Take Care: Foolish and Roier help each other.

•A nap and redirection: How Cellbit and Roier deal with emotions.

•Late Night: Cellbit and Roier enjoy each other company. (cw/tw: cigarettes/smoking)

•Missing?: Cellbit finds a missing poster.

•Body Temperature: Soulmates and below average body temperature. (cw/tw: General Pac trauma, blood/violence mentions)

•Sleeping Beauty: Cellbit admires a sleeping Roier.

•Candy Heist: A blue bird and spider steal some candy.

•Good Morning (the middle of the afternoon): Roier wakes up from his sleep.

•Take a Picture (It'll Last Longer): Niki doesn't recognize some photos. (cw/tw: blood/violence mentions)

•Red Candy Apple: Cellbit and Pac talk, with a knife on the floor between them. (cw/tw: implied death)

•Sleepy/Wide Awake: A half-asleep Roier tells Cellbit about a dream.

•Garden (of Eden): Tallulah meets Death in her dream.

•A Game of Follow the Leader: A brother and a sister play a game. (cw/tw: blood/violence/death implied/mentioned throughout)

•Glass Shards: Missa tells Phil about his scattered soul. (cw/tw: death/violence mentions throughout)

•All Better? (No.): Tina wasn't always a demon. (cw/tw: general horror elements)

•Buttercream: Tubbo attempts to bake a cake.

•Perfect Family (Only a half truth): A brother and a sister are brought home after a trip to the hospital. (cw/tw: minor derealization)

•Sweet Picnic: Roier and Leo have a picnic.

•Documentary: Bagi is alone, she copes. (cw/tw: implied mental health issues/violence, mentioned gore)

•Double-Blind Study (Placebo Effect): Cellbit gets therapy, Bagi doesn't. (cw/tw: implied/referenced mental health issues, repetitive narration)

•Aster Bouquet: Bad recognizes Tina from somewhere else. (cw/tw: implied/referenced death)

•Tidy (Ignore the Clutter): Cellbit keeps his mind tidy with a few exceptions. (cw/tw: implied violence)

•Two (for the price of one): Pac wonders about things.

•A Perfectly Average Day (Right?): Cellbit has a thoroughly average day. (cw/tw: minor derealization)

•Echoing Lullaby: Bad helps Cellbit get some rest in the same way he used to. (cw/tw: implied/referenced violence, implied mental health issues)

•Saying Grace (How Fun!): A look into Team Bolas Rojas family dinner. (cw/tw: implied/mentioned blood/death/violence, religion mentions throughout)

•Promise? Promise.: Pac and Mike have a conversation in a dream.

•Third time (Fourth time): Pac is covered in blood and thinks. (cw/tw: blood mentions throughout, implied/referenced violence)

•It Goes Like This: Roier and others make it onto the boat. (cw/tw: implied/referenced death, and implied/referenced suicidal ideation)

•Overcast Skies (the feeling of anemoia): Sunny grieves someone she never met. (cw/tw: referenced death.)

•Reflection: Pac looks at himself in the mirror. (cw/tw: blood/injury mentions, referenced drug use, implied mental health issues)

•Lost Television Signal: Mike tries to watch through static. (cw/tw: implied/referenced mental health issues, referenced drug use)

•Reminiscence: Cellbit throughout the years. (cw/tw: blood/violence/death mentioned/referenced throughout, general Cellbit fuckery, highly repetitive narration)

•Tachycardia: Pac, some grave digging, some science, and a rapid heart rate. (cw/tw: character death implied/mentioned, medical terminology, mentioned drug abuse)

[fyodorsno1ratao3]

Hi

This is chapter one of my fyozai AO3 fic (fluff+angst):

jsyk, this chapter is mostly angst and barely any fyodor, but thats bcs its only the first chapter

TW: implied/referenced sh, violence/slight gore???, dissociation

“So ...is that anaemic jackass dead?” Chuuya’s impatient voice sounded from behind him. 

“Yeah, Fyodor is no doubt dead.” He was sure Fyodor was dead, yet somehow, it didn’t feel...real. 

“I see.” 

Nikolai was also stood behind him, approaching from the side of the tower. Dazai reached down and picked up Fyo - Dostoevsky's arm. 

He didn’t know why, but Dazai felt emotionless - he wasn’t exactly sad, although he would miss being able to have a challenging round of chess. He just felt...empty. 

“Congrats Nikolai.” He couldn’t let his smile drop - not yet at least. “You wanted to kill him, didn’t you?”  

“Yeah, I certainly did. Although, at the same time, I didn’t.” Nikolai reached out, taking Fyodor’s disembodied arm from him. “No, you’re right. Fyodor and I... we never exchanged many words. But still, my life since meeting him has felt like... nothing I did before had the same purpose as it did afterwards.” 

Dazai knew what he meant. 

There would never again be anyone quite like Fyodor Dostoevsky. 

“Fyodor was right,” Nikolai’s words snapped Dazai out of his inner monologue. “He told me I fought so I could lose myself.” Nikolai placed Fyo – Dostoevsky's arm to his face. “And so now, I just... ” 

Dazai turned and walked away from the helicopters remains. 

“Not going to grace us with your usual snarkiness?” 

“Nah. Don’t feel like it.” He didn’t feel like doing anything at that moment, it was as if Dostoevsky had taken Dazai’s happiness with him onto that helicopter.  “I’d better take the antidote now.” 

It didn’t feel like it really mattered anymore, but still, Fyodor wasn’t quite a beautiful lady for him to die with. 

Beautiful he might have been, but still... 

Anyways, it wouldn’t be double suicide, just... double death. 

Fyodor had wanted to live after all, whilst Dazai didn’t really care. 

One of the only major differences between them. Dazai didn’t usually like to admit, even to himself, how similar they were, but now Fyodor was dead, it didn’t matter. 

But Fyodor had chosen to use his intelligence to force his own botched sense of justice upon the world, using his pawns to target ‘sinners’, whereas Dazai used his to attempt to save as many lives as possible.  

Once he was past Chuuya, he could finally let that bright smile drop from his face. 

He didn’t miss Dostoevsky exactly - well, he missed being able to interact with someone as smart as himself and he missed being able to understand another human being, but – okay, maybe he missed Fedya a bit. 

Fedya?!  

He sighed, shaking his head.  

Why did he call Dostoevsky Fedya?!  

“Something wrong Dazai?” 

Chuuya startled him out of his thoughts.  

“ Chuuya-sannn , I was just thinking of how short you are!” 

“YOU-”  

Dazai quickly reached for his pocket, about to pretend to get a call – Crap. He had forgotten he was still in his prison clothes.  

“ Chuuya-sannn , I’ve got to leave, now.” 

“Need a ride?” 

“Yes, please.” 

Dazai was thankful for Chuuya’s company on the ride home.  

Chuuya could tell something was wrong, Dazai could tell by the fact that Chuuya kept talking with him even though he brushed him off multiple times. 

Chuuya didn’t know what was wrong, though. Hell, Dazai didn’t even know himself. 

That night, he dreamt of Fedya. 

“Dazai dear, did you miss me?”  

Fedya was standing almost uncomfortably close to him, his piercing violet eyes gazing deep into his soul.  

“Ah, I see.” Dazai responded, quickly adjusting to the situation. “You just can’t keep yourself away from me.”  

Fedya’s eyes suddenly coldened further, Dazai could even have sworn he saw a spark of red amongst the magenta.  

“Homosexuality is a sin.”  

Fyodor’s upper lip curled slightly as his posture stiffened. “I would never commit such a sin.”  

“Ah well.” Dazai shrugged and crossed his arms. “Well, if you ever change your mind...”  

Fedya’s cloak (Since when did he wear that? That’s really tacky.) swayed as he leant back, now standing fully upright.  

“I-”  

Dazai walked into the bathroom and splashed some water onto his face, mentally preparing himself for the workday. Ugh.  

He raised his head, staring at his damp reflection in the mirror as water dripped from a strand of his wavy brown hair.  In the golden morning light coming from the small bathroom window, it seemed almost red.  

Suddenly, behind him in the mirror he saw a glimpse of sparkling magenta. He spun around quickly, knocking the mirror to the floor where it shattered into a million fractals of light.  

Fuck. He was hallucinating again. 

He slumped to the floor, his body splayed limply upon the tiles. 

Why am I... disappointed?  

I was the man that killed him, why-?  A heavy weight rested in his stomach, pulling him down into the depths of despair. 

His head felt clouded, like it had yesterday. 

His thoughts spiralled around his head, overpowering yet numbing at the same time.  

A heavy weight rested in his stomach, pulling him down into the depths of despair. He couldn’t breathe, thoughts running away from him as he lay helplessly on the floor, unable to think, to move, to even feel. His body was frozen, barely noticing the glass digging into his back and numb to the warm blood seeping into his clothes. 

His vision started blurring as tears fell from his eyes, leaving silvery trails on his already moist skin. 

Yet he wasn’t sad, just... empty. 

He needed to feel something, anything.  

His gaze alighted on a sharp, glittering shard.   

Dazai went to work with a new, unseen bloom of red staining the otherwise pristine bandages winding around his upper arm. 

The fragments of metal and glass lay on the floor of Dazai’s bathroom amidst a pool of blood, reflecting light around the ivory room. 

In the glass you could see the room’s reflection from a hundred different angles, shattered into a million different pieces. 

The room’s reflection, alongside a glimmer of magenta and a flash of navy blue. 

“Well, isn’t this interesting.”  

On the outside, Dazai looked especially cheerful that day.  

On the inside, he wanted to cry. 

“Kunikida-kunnn-”  

“Kunikida-kunn-” 

“Kunikida-kunnn-”  

Kunikida finally snapped, whirling around with a murderous glint in his eye. 

“ OSAMU DAZAI, IF ALL YOU’RE GOING TO DO ALL DAY IS BE ANNOYING, YOU MIGHT AS WELL GO HOME.” 

“Okay!” 

Atsushi winced as Dazai skipped cheerfully out of the room. 

‘Kunikida-kunn’ sighed, lifting up his glasses and rubbing his eyes. 

“Sometimes, Dazai makes me want to die.” 

“You should probably go after him if you don’t want him to go home;” Ranpo interjected, looking up from his bag of mochi. 

“No, it’s fine. I don’t have the energy to deal with him. I’ll just let him go.” 

Dazai lay on the rug of his apartment, staring blindly at the ceiling. 

He didn’t know why, but he felt depressed; even more than usual. A tear slowly spread across his eye, turning his vision blurry as the film obscured his sight. The room was slowly blurring into simple blocks of blank colour.  

The salty tears ran down his face, slowly seeping into his hair as he softly sobbed, each spasm shaking his body almost painfully. 

His breathing was jagged and irregular, too shallow and fast, making him feel dizzy and faint.  

He felt like he was slowly falling out of his life, a simple side character in the story of someone else’s life, detached and unimportant. 

Shitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshitshit.  

It had been a while since he last felt like this, but it was not a new sensation; almost as far from it as possible. Like a watchful parent, always just over his shoulder.

Usually he was with someone else, both Kunikida and Chuuya knew what to do if he began to feel like this. 

But by himself, he couldn’t do anything at all to stop this indescribable feeling of despair from dragging him ever deeper.

“You really should check on him,” Ranpo insisted. 

“Alright, fine-” 

A loud ring interrupted him from Ranpo’s bag. 

“Oooh, Poe’s calling me!” 

Ranpo dived under the table to answer the call from his supposed ‘rival’. 

They act more like lovers than rivals; Kunikida thought. Oh well. I’d better see if Dazai is alright.  

Suddenly, Dazai felt a hand running through his hair, bringing him back almost immediately.   

His breath began to calm, his tears slowly drying.  

Once his vision began to clear, Dazai felt the hand move away and he heard steps walking away from him. 

He shakily rose up on his elbows, his breath still unsteady but almost normal. 

His vision was clear enough to just catch the edge of a cloak as it flew from the faceless figure as they leapt out the window, unwilling to be seen. 

Without a second thought, he leapt out the window after the figure. 

The harsh wind ripped open his eyelids, causing fresh tears to leak out his eyes. 

His vision began to fade, splotches of black filling the gaps in his vision as his oxygen-deprived brain struggled to come up with an explanation for what the hell just happened. 

The last thing he saw before he blacked out was a pair of sparkling magenta eyes. 

That rat bastard?!  

Oh shit, I fell right into his trap.  

Suddenly, as he was only about two floors away from the ground, he heard Kunikida’s voice screaming his name  

“DAZAI!!”  

Oh sh-  

If you want to read more, you can find it on AO3 here!

[serickswrites]

Whump One Shots

Here are all my one shots (can become series by request!) organized by theme (this is the first of many)

Whump

That Didn't Work Out as I Intended--TW: implied/referenced kidnapping; hurt/recovery; trauma response: flight and freeze

Definitely Not--TW: kidnapping, torture, future torture, restraints, creepy/intimate whumper

Just Watch--TW: kidnapping, confinement, creepy/intimate whumper

Let's Kiss--TW: noncon; assault, future assault, kidnapping, self-sacrifice, creepy/intimate whumper

You Can't Quit On Me Now--TW: kidnapping; blood; hospital; wounds; mild description of gore; major character injury; recovery and aftermath

Idiots--TW: referenced kidnapping; implied torture; helplessness

If I Have to Tell You Again--TW: kidnapping; creepy/intimate whumper, implied torture, noncon, defiant whumpee, conditioning

Horribly Wrong--TW: kidnapping; future/implied/referenced torture; beatings; restraint; forced to watch

A Mask--TW: kidnapping; blood; death; character death (temporary)

Impossible--TW: referenced torture; hurt/comfort; hurt/aftermath; recover/aftermath; reluctant whumpee; hospital

Kind of Fun--TW: suffocation; blood; creepy (not intimate) whumper; defiant whumpee

Moon--TW: blood, major character injury, restraints, captivity, stabbing, rescue, caretaker and whumpee

Stars--TW: mentions of torture (electrocution, beating, whipping, waterboarding), attempted drowning, bound, forced to watch 

Rain--TW: past abuse/torture, recovery/aftermath, conditioning, burns, break with reality

Wake Up--TW: torture, burns, kidnapping, creepy whumper, blood, future torture implied

Lost--TW: restraints, rescue

Flirt--TW: wounds, injury

Movie--comfort, vaguely referenced whump

DND--TW: kidnapping; torture; blood

Late--TW: restraints, torture, defiant whumpee

Sleep--TW: torture, creepy/intimate whumper, water torture

Braids--TW: kidnapping, restraint, gags, torture, creepy/intimate whumper

Call Me, Maybe?--TW: kidnap, rescue, injury, referenced torture, restraint, gags, seizures

Smile--TW: kidnapping, creepy/intimate whumper, noncon, future assault, past assault (assumption)

Earth--TW: kidnapping; burial; buried alive; rescue attempt

Gone--TW: recovery/aftermath, discussion of suicide (very very passive ideation), implied torture

Five Minutes--TW: kidnapping, torture, blood, creepy/intimate whumper

Flowers--just comfort, vague implication of past whump

Tree--TW: restraint; kidnapping; defiant whumpee

Hush--TW: ball gag, gagging, noncon, implied kidnapping, creepy/intimate whumper, defiant whumpee

Ghost--TW: character death, death of a loved one

Snow--TW: kidnapping, escape attempt

Reunion--TW: past mention of trauma/abuse; dissociation; comfort; hospital; mention of blood

Taste--poisoning

Five--TW: kidnapping; torture; blood; stabbing; creepy/intimate whumper; conditioning

Beloved--TW: past abuse/trauma; aftermath/recovery

Sizzle--TW: restraints; mild depiction of gore; branding

Countdown--TW: kidnapping; torture; referenced murder

Here?--TW: kidnapping; beating (aftermath); hallucinations; referenced character death (major)

Sleep--TW: sleep deprivation; kidnapping; torture; restraint; defiant whumpee

Song--TW: hospital; coma? (honestly idk what medically is wrong with whumpee....); aftermath and recovery; implied torture; implied kidnapping

Shoulder--TW: gun; blood; gunshot; wound; mild depiction of gore

Snap--TW: escape attempt; broken bones; torture (mild); kidnapping (implied)

Crackle--TW: sickfic (maybe, idk what caused Whumpee’s pneumonia--which is what this is y’all if you didn’t know lol)

Pop--TW: restraint; kidnapping; dislocation

Cook--TW: kidnapping

Shirt--hurt/comfort

Roses--TW: non-con drug use, creepy/intimate whumper

Unsure--TW: aftermath; trauma aftermath; hurt/comfort; hurt/recovery

Better--TW: captivity; kidnapping; implied torture; referenced botched rescue attempt

This--TW: self sacrifice elements

Lies--TW: torture, blood, knives

Anniversary--TW: captivity, non-con, drugging, restraints, creepy/intimate whumper

Touch--TW: referenced captivity, hurt/aftermath, referenced blood, implied kidnapping, implied torture

Wake Up--TW: implied kidnapping; mcd; noncon drug use; poison

Sea Sick--TW: cruel whumper, seasickness

Dropping the Eaves--TW: captivity; physical assault; implied torture

On My Way--TW: no express whump warnings, but pain is coming

Sick--TW: creepy/intimate whumper

Tired--TW: blood, unconsciousness, hurt/aftermath

Sense--TW: implied kidnapping/captivity

Worse--TW: injury, blood

Writing--TW: hurt/aftermath, hurt/comfort, implied torture, implied kidnapping

Missed--TW: implied torture, implied future violence, rescue

This is a nightmare--TW: referenced kidnapping, referenced torture

Wrong--TW: captivity, restraint, torture

Wonderful--TW: kidnapping, torture, restraints, non-con, sexual assault, blood

Hug--TW: hurt/aftermath, referenced kidnapping

Stubborn--TW: captivity, torture

Try--TW: abduction, implied future torture

G'Morning--TW: implied noncon, restraints, creepy/intimate whumper

Interesting--TW: choking, implied noncon, creepy/intimate whumper

Last Chance--TW: kidnapping, restraints

So Many--TW: restraints, implied torture, stress position, noncon, creepy/intimate whumper

Goodbye--TW: self-sacrifice

Happen--TW: hurt/aftermath, blood, unconsciousness

Plan--TW: hurt/aftermath, hospital, broken bones, head injury

Unexpected--TW: bindings, gags, restraints, implied noncon, creepy/intimate whumper

Stay Down--TW: head injury, blood, physical violence, gun

Struggle--TW: kidnapping, sensory deprivation

Blood--TW: blood, blood loss, knives, stabbing, gore, caretaker and whumpee

Bad Dream--TW: kidnapping, torture, restraint, drugging, creepy/intimate whumper, hurt/aftermath

To Annoy--TW: stress position, whipping, blood, violence

Let Me See--TW: blood, wounds, gunshot, sprains, self-sacrifice

Cold--TW: hypothermia, hospitals, rescue

Dreaming--TW: mcd, referenced death

Bolt--TW: arrow wound, wound, blood, losing consciousness

Worse Ways--TW: threats of death, electrocution, defiant whumpee

Spiked--TW: drugging, referenced kidnapping, hurt/aftermath, hurt/comfort

Why Care--TW: hurt/aftermath, hurt/recovery

My Heart Belongs to You--TW: medical whump, blood, gore, blood loss

Yandere Whumper Request--TW: yandere whumper, captivity, non-con, restraints, gags

Self-Inflicted--TW: captivity, blood, knives, self-harm, escape attempt

Shrapnel--TW: explosion, blood, wounds, unconsciousness, self sacrifice

Alright For Now--TW: Hurt/comfort, hurt/aftermath, tbh this is just fluff

Don't Leave--TW: hurt/comfort, hurt/aftermath, implied sensory deprivation?

Like That--TW: torture, knife, blood,, defiant whumpee

Safety--TW: torture, captivity, restraints, electrocution

Clown--TW: captivity, torture, wounds, whipping, restraints, defiant whumpee

Promise--TW: implied torture, kidnapping/captivity, mcd (maybe? you pick your ending folks: does team arrive in time to save whumpee? or do they just find caretaker? the world may never know)

[insoukokuhell-434]

Dazai Taking Care of Chuuya fics

Including:

Physical

Emotional

NLH helps with Arabahaki

The format I’m using is:

Title - writer (ao3 link) Fic length Time period (teen/mafia skk, 22! Skk, all ages) Additional tags (Tags in bold added by me for extra info) TW

Physical

the moments in between - hellcatspangledshalalala

3.7k  ALL AGES Hurt/Comfort Post-Corruption pining, fluff, angst, fluff at the end, character study, Dazai POV, first kiss, getting together, dazai’s depression

Recovery - rutu14

11.4k 22 SKK Hurt/Comfort Post-Corruption (Post Dead Apple) Angst, Confessions, Soft Dazai Osamu (or at least as soft as he can be), Reconciliation, Getting together, First kiss, Angst & fluff, Angst with a happy ending, Literal sleeping together TW -  Implied Chronic Pain, Implied/Referenced Drug Addiction

Don't Leave Me - moonrice (moonyeyes)

5.6k MAFIA SKK Hurt/Comfort, Sickfic Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, ability-caused sickness TW - Dazai-Typical Suicide References

all these reckless nights - feralrookie (ag_sasami)

3.5k MAFIA SKK Dazai takes care of Chuuya, Injury Recovery Post-Corruption Sharing a Bed, Hospitalization, Hair Braiding, Non-Sexual Intimacy, fluff

Stab Wound. - sp1tl0rd

1.3k MAFIA SKK Minor Injuries, Sharing a Bed - of course there's only one bed, Soft Ending, Dazai is Bad at Feelings, Tending to wounds, Protective Chuuya, Washing

it starts with bloodshed - parasocialism        

6.4k MAFIA SKK Hurt/Comfort Post-Corruption Pining, Fluff and Angst, Dazai centred, thats only bc Chuuya's too tired to think, Washing

*Fell Down and Nothing Bled- shadowsapiens 2.5k 22 SKK Exhaustion, haunted apartment, brief descriptions of violence Enemies to Really Annoying Lovers, Post-Dead Apple

Emotional

all that I can give to you - BitterButCute

2.9k MAFIA SKK Hurt/Comfort Pre-Relationship, Literal Sleeping Together, Dazai and Chuuya are soft for each other, Chuuya POV, Chuuya-centric, self harm, Canon Compliant, Nightmares, Vulnerability TW -  implied referenced self harm, Dazai-Typical Suicide References

*A Place Like This - roadtosomewhere

6.5k 22 SKK (Post 109) Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Literal Sleeping Together, Caring Dazai, Caring Chuuya, Chuuya is Good With Kids, Comforting Dazai, Chuuya Needs a Hug

Whispers in the Dark - CastielWho        

1.9k MAFIA SKK (Post DHC) Emotional Hurt/Comfort Grief/Mourning, Caring Dazai, Soft Dazai, Chuuya Needs a Hug, Literal Sleeping Together, Canon Compliant, Skk's unconventional mating rituals TW - Past Abuse

Arabahaki & NLH

(the hc that Arabahaki is a constant presence for Chuuya, and No Longer Human can stop the screaming and nightmares)

lend me your shoulder (i've never had someone to lean on) - scripted_suicide

1.7k MAFIA SKK Literal Sleeping Together, light angst, happy ending, Canon Compliant,  Still an AU though TW - Dazai-Typical Suicide References & Suicide Attempts

(the sequel)

i have died every night waking for you (all alone i have been waiting for you)-scripted_suicide

3.4k 22 SKK First Kiss, Fluff & Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Literal Sleeping Together, Canon Compliant, love confessions

an attempt at intimacy - uncanny cryptid

1.9k MAFIA SKK Emotional Hurt/Comfort Emotional Intimacy, Chuuya is Bad at Feelings, Dazai is Bad at Feelings, Fluff and Angst, Cuddling & Snuggling, Literal Sleeping Together, Nightmares kinda?? if you call arahabakis screams a nightmare, Dazai's mental health issues

Please like/reblog if this helped u find a fic, I'd be delighted to know asjsj <3

“Chuuya taking care of Dazai” recs here

Fic rec masterlist here

[mabsolgirl]

The Bookshelf

So I read fanfics (shocker, I know /sarcasm) and I read a lot of them. I have some fics that I really like and often look back to but it can be tedious to find them again. So I made this post to be a fanfic bookshelf of sorts! To keep track of my favorite fics, share what I like about 'em, and let you all read them too if anyone is interested. If an author has a Tumblr account (that I can find) they'll be mentioned. This'll be updated whenever I find new fics I really like!

Heads up, you'll definitely be able to tell which characters are my favorite lol.

Welcome to the bookshelf! Take a peek under the cut to look around!

[Shattered Mirror]

@cinderduck

"It was meant to be a normal supply run."

Fandom: Dandy's World

Tw: Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Starvation, Mental Breakdown, Blood, Isolation

A really dark fic, wouldn't advise if ur looking for something lighter as it has a lot of heavy themes. Unfortunately I love angst and I too find myself giving the favorite blorbos the trauma hammer. Excited to see where the fic goes!

The tldr for anyone curious, Glisten is left behind on a run and has to survive being trapped on one of the lower floors.

@/

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[If I Were to Apologize]

"Glisten is a terrible person. He knows that. Everyone knows that. He has hurt many he loved, he has hurt many who have once loved him too. Can someone like me still be forgiven, if I found the courage to ask?"

Fandom: Dandy's World

Tw: Suicide Attempt, Toxic Behavior

A shorter fic but it still knows how to hit ya hard and give you nice warm cookies at the end. In other notes this one helped drive me to clean my room so that was nice :)

@/

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[Choking on Ichor]

"After waking up in a dingy elevator with no recollection of how he got there, Glisten (along with the others) tries to make sense of the frightening new world he finds himself trapped in.

Used to being the perfect center of attention, Glisten's egotistical nature is challenged as he must fight for survival. If he wants to make it out of this twisted version of Gardenview alive (along with his fellow Toons), he has to show a side of himself that no one's ever seen before."

Fandom: Dandy's World

Tw: (Survival) Horror, Blood, Death

It's not often a story manages to actually fool me, movie, episode, literature, etc. After a while you can tell where a story is heading based on certain ques. This fic managed to throw me through a loop despite the signs being there. Bravo to the author! Super curious on what happens next I'm literally on the edge of my seat.

@slyuq

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[Shiny, Chrome, and Clean]

"Vee rarely shows emotions. Everyone knows this. She used to, before the shutdown, but has deferred to logic in these trying times. Everyone appreciates having a calm voice of reason around, so they don’t question it.

Glisten is perfect. Everyone knows this. He never makes mistakes and is always reliable to do anything and everything wonderfully. No one has ever questioned why he’s so dedicated to the image of perfection.

It’s only a matter of time before they both either give up the facade or break trying to hold it up."

Fandom: Dandy's World

Tw: Suicide Attempt

A much lighter fic (thank god). As a ReflectiveDetective leaning shipper, I really love this fic! We need more Glisten and Vee fr. The dynamic? The angst? The plot? Amazing! Really fun read, highly recommend!

@mable-stitchpunk

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[Literally any of Mable's FNaF Fics]

"---"

Fandom: Five Nights at Freddy's

Tw: Varies between works

Really really really good stories with the Home series still being updated to this day years after the first chapter! Really impressive. One of those really long reads. Like, you'll need a few days at least but it's worth it trust me.

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[The Knight Guard AU Fics]

@charlieslowartsies

"---"

Fandom: Five Nights at Freddy's

Tw: Varies between works

One of the more creative AUs I've seen. It's always a pleasure going back to read them! It's a more magic-based AU with a fun cast of characters. A real treat, go read them already.

-----