#turning pain into pleasure is a batfamily normalility
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gothamite-rambler · 2 months ago
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Harley smirked, "I earned my psych diploma, boys."
Harley (analyzing the wayne boys): You have depression, daddy issues, mommy issues, chaos issues, insomnia, attachment issues, anger issues and a constant need to make people happy even if you struggle with it.
Dick, Jason, Damian, Tim looked at each other wondering who's she's referring to.
Harley (tight smile): All of ya, it refers to all of ya.
Dick: I don't have attachment issues!
Harley: Jason and I talk a lot, you do. Tim and I talk a lot too, you do. It's perfectly normal though.
Dick glared both his brother who averted eye contact with the man.
Cass: What about me?
Harley: Oh you're perfect.
Dick: She has all of the shit you told us we have!
Harley: She doesn't have insomnia or anger issues, and she's fixed her daddy issues thanks to Bruce.
Cass clapped happily.
Duke (pausing a show on his phone): I was good with my mom and dad, but what would you give me?
Harley: Traumatized, social anxiety, no parent issues, but guilt for not savin' them and a tad bit of depression.
Duke (happy): A tad? I'm doing good then!
Duke returned to watching his show.
Tim (bothered): That's not fair.
Harley: It's not my fault you and ya brothers deal with cripplin' depression brought on by numerous traumatic episodes which leads ya to being easily startled at times, avoiding specific situations and leaves the three oldest sexually confused due to switchin' your pain to pleasure.
Damian sighed relived at the last part while the three oldest Wayne boys blushed because she was right. Duke chuckled slowly, turning into loud laughter.
Duke: Didn't miss a beat, did she?
Dick (blushing): I'm not... that into pain.
Harley (doubtful expression on her face): Don't lie.
The brothers left annoyed that Harley was right, while the therapist pats herself on the shoulder for her therapy skills sticking.
Harley: Joker insanity or not I still got it! I'm getting accepted by better help soon enough.
Duke laughed harder causing Cass to shake her head with a smile.
pt 2
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