#trying to process this book through tumblr shitposting

[ap0chulina]

Once again thinking about key saying:

"The burning city is mine, and I am yours. I changed the story for you. So tell me the lie that you love me"

And immediately i go:

[honestmagpie]

Hello y'all I just woke up from a nap and I just had the funniest fucking dream.

I dreamed that Tumblr had fixed a glitchy in-post game that had been on the site for so long that everyone had forgotten it had ever existed. It was a card game where you had three factions that would battle I guess, but it never worked so people only used it to shitpost and dunk on tumblr's broken website before it basically disappeared from everyone's consciousness.

Anyway in my dream they FINALLY fixed it after YEARS and now everyone was getting sorted into one of three factions and trying to figure out how to play or whatever.

There was a combat faction that was all pictures of fists, armor, attacks. It was boring and only useful for the game itself so no-one ever picked it, because everyone was just there for the meme reaction images it generated.

There was a magic class where every card was just a really basic big letter on a page, like they'd do in the start of chapters in chapter books, and it was meant to look elaborate but mostly people just used combinations of them to spell out swears or reactions, and there was a third faction. I don't remember what it was but it also had decent functionality in the meme sphere.

Anyway I knew nothing except 'oh yeah tumblr used to have some kinda game attached to it' and somehow accidentally ended up in the combat faction with the shitty boring cards for a game no-one really understood how to play.

Basically any time you played a round (and god only knew who you were playing, tbh, just because they fixed it didn't mean it made any damn sense), you'd get this like, Gigantamax-esque cutscene where you'd go through this elaborate process of turning in old cards and getting like three new ones, they'd get laid out dramatically on the play field, then they'd flip over, and it was all filled with basically the pokemon crowd noises from sun and moon. Not much control over anything at all but it looked really cool.

Anyway the first time I did that, it flipped over three cards and they were three cards PERFECTLY in sequence of a guy getting decked in the face, the fist doing the decking, and then the arm of the dude decking the first guy.

I had zero control, the game just played out like a perfect meme reaction image of punching some rando in the face and I thought it was hilarious.

Anyway some other shit was happening too but that's way less important than the dream imagery of basically three red magic-the-gathering cards in sequence of some poor armored knight getting punched in the face, an elaborately-armored fist, and just an armored arm of some guy throwing a punch because fuck that guy in particular, with artwork all lining up too perfectly to be a coincidence.

[shawoluvs]

~check in tag~ I was tagged by the lovely @anyhao, and this is super cute so thank you~~

why did you choose your url? I chose my url because I am a Shawol and a Reveluv! At the time I'd been through several urls based on eras/songs and they only worked for a short while so I wanted something more permanent and SHINee are my ults while Red Velvet is the first girl group I really started following so here we go~ I actually have a list of other fandom combo names for urls though just in case~

do you have any sideblogs? I do indeed because I am one of those people who has to divide my interests in order to not get overwhelmed by them~ I have a general multifandom/literature/personal blog @lonesplendour and an anime/manga blog @kimitokara~

how long have you been on tumblr? A long time, like maybe 10 years???? I really got into tumblr when I was in my early teens 'cause other social media (idek if I count tumblr as social media pffttt) just wasn't cutting it. I've been on like all sides of tumblr at this point like rpgs, chaotic mess blogs, book blogging etc. etc. But most of those blogs no longer exist. Only one of them kinda does and I've not been able to access it for literally years 'cause I canny get into the email it's attached too and my 100000000000 attempts to get tumblr to help me out with it (like I literally once asked them to just like shut it down if I couldn't access it but no luck there) has just never worked so... that's fun...

do you have a queue tag? Nope~

why did you start your blog in the first place? As much as tumblr can be a mess I do really like it as a platform for seeing great content for my interests so basically when the blog mentioned above was no longer accessible (it's so maddening too like I just can't remember the password and I can't set a new one 'cause it's an old email I also can't access?????) I decided to make this one anndddd for a while this was a similar like multifandom, anything goes blog, but then I divided up after a while.

why did you choose this profile picture? I wanted a profile picture that related to my url and in my head it was so cute 'cause I was going to have this whole colour scheme like SHINee themed and have a header and icon that matched and then after hours of trying to make all these things I got tired and was just like "yes this version will do" and there we have it~~~ Like I don't hate my icon (my girls with SHINee lightsticks, what's not to love???) but it's just not... edited well... at all ejhrgbejrge but sometimes there's a vision and sometimes you create it and other times you sail right past it and wonder how you lost yourself on this other thing but no longer have the patience to try again so you settle for where you ended up and that's my icon right there.

why did you choose this header? ^same as above.

whats your post with the most notes? I went to check and it's this one. Which really just proves people are thirsty for Taemin.

how many mutuals do you have? Imma count. 96 on this blog specifically! Which is quite a lot actually, that's really nice~

how many followers do you have? 405 on this blog~

how many people do you follow? 266 pfffttt which honestly makes my mutual number even nicer 'cause it means like 1/3 of the people I follow are my mutuals~

have you ever made a shitpost? Tons. Strange of you to think I make much of anything else, honestly.

how often do you use tumblr? Pretty much daily. I don't necessarily actively reblog and post original content daily but I tend to do a daily check in of sorts~

have you ever had an argument or a fight with another blog? Not really though anons have tried to pick fights with me particularly on my anime blog, it's not something I really take seriously, it was generally ship drama and was so random like... good times honestly

how do you feel about “you have to reblog this” posts? someone telling me I have to reblog something immediately puts me off honestly, I know that's childish or whatever but like if it's important or something I like/care about I'll reblog it without the guilt so...

do you like tag games? Yesssssss~~~ so again, thank you for this tag~

do you like ask games? I do! I think ask games can be very cute but I don't do them that often, mainly 'cause I get embarrassed if I don't get any asks from it but equally if someone I follow is doing one I'm like "I can't send them an ask, that's so embarrassing!!!" so in other words, yes I do but also I am terrible at the whole concept

which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? I'm not sure how to measure tumblr fame, like is that by followers or...... cause honestly quite a few of my mutuals seem to have a lot of followers (as they should, they're lovely) but I also just don't know, I don't tend to ask them or know that about them because I don't care??? The whole followers thing isn't a big deal to me... notes on content on the other hand hahaha likeeeeeeeeee support content creators thanking you

do you have any crushes on any mutuals? No??? I mean ejhrbgjee I don't really know most of my mutuals very well (honestly 96 is nice but also like 96 people ejhgbjerge that's a lot for my anxiety to process, I've barely said two words to most of them, seriously I'm so sorry, it's not you it's me, you're all great) but also in general I've not had a genuine crush on anyone in........................................ years? so... fun times

I'm going to tag a few of my lovely mutuals, though obviously not all of them 'cause ejhrgbjere that's a lot, but anyway pls participate if you like and apologies again for probably never having even said hi to you~ @userseokkie, @lilbubtaemin, @eternallys, @joshriku, @babyseulgii, @fourseascns, @atinyhater, @ncityzen, @haechsan, @solaarflaree

[grown-clone]

Hi can I have a romantic matchup please 💕

She/her, straight

I'm 15

I look like this

Personality: I am very empathetic, always trying to keep the people around me happy (even if I'm not in the end) I hate disappointing people so I can over work myself sometimes. Mostly I am kind and polite, but a I get very sassy moments (I can also be very sarcastic). Im also kind of reserved when I first meet someone and it can take me awhile to show my fun, goofy, happy side to them

Aquarius, infj

I like reading books, writing, listening to music (mostly kpop). I also like to go exploring like in the forest or even abandoned places I also love cooking and baking (more so baking tbh)

sometimes I stop in the middle of talking because I think I talk to much (I've been told many times that I do so I just try not to really talk in a way)i play with my hands a lot, I have a really high pitched (idk sorta cute?) sneeze, I can be very clumsy (I literally tripped on air once😂) when I do something scary my hands shaky after I've done the scary thing (if that makes any sense)

I match you up with.....Inasa!!!

Inasa and your personality are pretty different, but you balance each other out very well!

You met Inasa when you and the class where going in for their provisional exams, and automatically his large and loud personality caught your attention. You had also gotten into U.A. on recommendation, Your Quirk was called Jurassic Bones-Aqua, and you could turn into any Pescatarian or aquatic dinosaur. So, pretty powerful. You just stared as he cracked his head on the sidewalk as he bowed. He looked vaguely familiar, but you couldn't quite put your finger on it. Refocusing your attention on your teacher, you walked inside with your class to begin the exam. The doors opened, and you took a step into your future.

-------

"HELLO THERE, FELLOW HERO STUDENT!!!" You screamed and whipped around, facing the tall, boisterous boy from Shiketsu. His faced softened every so slightly, and he lowered his voice. "My apologies!! I just get so fired up whenever I see another hero in training! Especially one with a Quirk like yours!!" He stuck out his hand for your to shake, practically ripping your arm off in the process.

"Oh, thank you. You were pretty cool in there too!" You smiled. Inasa seemed to glow from the inside.

"You really think so!?" He asked, his eyes sparkling with determination. You nodded, giggling. "AMAZING!!! I love meeting fellow students who can see the passion in heroes!!!" Inasa did not leave your side, rambling on and on about passion and righteousness. You were getting exhausted trying to keep up with the conversation, but he seemed happy, so you listened until your ears fell off. In the end you exchanged snaps, you feeling wary of giving him your number just yet. When you got home that night, scrolling through your socials, you immediately burst out laughing at Inasa's latest story.

"And they were Villains" The TV spoke, The camera turned to Inasa, looking totally shocked.

"Oh my god they were Villains." He said, his voice an near perfect imitation of the vine.

Inasa Yoarashi was a Shitposter. From there you begged to see if he had a Tumblr, which he most certainly did. A lot of it was scenic pictures from hikes he went on to train. But the rest of it was pure, classic, Gen Z humor. Memes, vine references, his Tik Tok account which you soon followed. And oh god, his Tik Tok was even BETTER. You decided very quickly that you were glad you let Inasa talk your ear off.

------

Inasa, however, on the other end was FLIPPING OUT.

"THIS IS VERY BAD. CAMIE HOW DO I DELETE MY TIK TOK ACCOUNT BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO EMBARASS MYSELF IN FRONT OF THE CUTE DINOSAUR GIRL!?!?!?!"

"First of all, stop yelling. Its , like, the middle of the night and I'm exhausted from today. She probably thinks its funny. Its not like she's super old or whatever."

"Camie of course! You're absolutely right!" Inasa belly flopped on his bed, furiously typing out a new post.

"Ugh, how do you have this much energy? I'm, like, sooooo tired after today."

"IT'S NOT ENERGY, CAMIIE, ITS PASSION!!!"

------

A few days later you were chatting with Tsu, talking about meeting up sometime that weekend with the rest of the girls for a day out. School had been picking up slowly, so a group study sesh with snacks at your favorite cafe seemed like a great idea. You all had finally settled on a date and time.

"Hey Y/N, do you still talk to that boy from the licensing exam?" Tsu asked, finger pointing to her mouth. "The loud one, who doesn't like Todoroki?"

"Huh? Oh, you mean Inasa? Yeah, but a lot of it is just memes. Sometimes we get on Facetime and bake together." The thought made you smile, remembering the time Inasa got icing on the end of his nose, and didn't realize the entire time he iced the cupcakes he was making.

"Ribbit, you two must be closer than you think Y/N. You're always texting someone in class, and I suppose its him. " Tsu said, looking at you with those all-knowing eyes of hers. Seriously, she's a genius, and picks up on almost anything. You giggled and looked away, shoving your hands behind your head. "Maybe you should invite him along, Ribbit! I'm sure the rest of the girls wouldn't mind!"

"You really think so? It would be nice to hang out with him without our faces glitching every five seconds."

"I know so, Ribbit."

So it was decided that Inasa, who loved the idea of meeting all your girlfriends and "Seeing what their passion for heroism is!", would join you two at the cafe on a Sunday Morning, when it would be most empty.

The string of bells rung when you opened the door, alerting the owner( Who nobody knew the real name of, and simply asked to be called Clone) that you were there.

"Oh my goodness, Y/N is that you? Oh , you've gotten so big and strong!!!"

"You saw me Wednesday, Clone." You said, shrugging off your bag and setting it at a large table with tall stools. "The girls are coming to hang out, and Momo said she would bring her credit card. Inasa is also coming." You said, hoping she would ignore the last part.

"INASA!!! THE INASA!!!! THE ONE YOU PESTERED ME ABOUT MY LEMON CAKE RECIPE FOR INASA!!!! Oooooooh, he better leave a good impression!!! And a review, my lemon cake is AMAZING." You nodded, laughing. Neither of you heard the door chimes ring again as Uraraka and Tsu walked through the door.

"Hey guys!" You said, walking over to give them a hug. You pointed to the table and they set their stuff down, helping you get enough chairs to seat everyone. Eventually, everyone but Inasa had showed up. You all were sipping on some drinks and munching on snacks, when the door chimes rang again.

"HELLO I BROUGHT CUPCAKES!!!!" A very familiar, very loud voice spoke from behind a large stack of boxes.

"Inasa!" You called, hopping out of your seat and dashing over to help him set down the boxes. Inside were beautifully decorated chocolate cupcakes, with whipped icing and dried fruit sprinkled on top. They looked mouthwatering. The rest of the girls leapt upon the boxes immediately. Inasa looked quite pleased with himself at the sight of you and your friends enjoying the cupcake.

"Awf my gowd, Inafa fees are amafing." You said, grinning up at your tall friend. He just smiled and joined you all.

Put simply, the group loved him. Even Clone! He was boisterous and loud, and maybe even brash, but he was funny and kind. He helped you study, and you helped him study. Overall, the session went exactly as planned.

"Bye guys!!" You shouted, waving at everyone leaving as you ducked back into the cafe to help clean up.

"I think that went well!" Inasa said, saluting you for some reason. You giggled and nodded.

"Very well, I'm afraid they're all going to try and steal you from me." You began moving chairs back in place.

"Awww, don't you worry Y/N, you're my favorite!" Inasa said. And he said it so calmly, like it was a well known fact you already should have known. "You'll always be my favorite!"

The words made you blush, and blush hard. Inasa did have a tendency to say things like that, but you always thought it was just his personality. Clone peaked her head around the corner, eyes wide and eyebrows raised. You made a shooing motion with your hands.

"Aww, Inasa you're so sweet. You're gonna make someone real happy someday!" You set the last chair down.

"Yeah, I hope so." Inasa said. You didn't notice him looking at you .

Clone groaned, smacking her face with her hands. "Oh my god Y/N, he has a crush on you!! God children are so dense! " she made a noise of disgust and disappeared back into the kitchen.

You were a blushing mess, quite positive your skin would catch on fire if you blushed anymore. You risked a glance at Inasa, who's face held no indication of his actual skintone with how red he was. He glanced at you, and made an "eep!" noise of some kind(which, yes, you totally found cute) and turned away. The earthquake-like shaking of your heart let you know that Clone was probably right(she almost always is) and you had to deal with this. Somehow. Your brain was moving at a million miles a minute, so much so that you didn't notice Inasa's hands on your shoulders at first. And then you did. And then you blushed some more.

"Y/N.....May I kiss you?" The question was short and simple. All you had to do was nod. And fuck, you weren't no idiot. You shook your head vigorously up and down, not having any time to react before Inasa just scooped you up into his arms and pressed a deep, fiery, and yes passionate kiss to your lips. He tasted like a cool breeze and chocolate, and you could stay there forever, arms wrapped around his neck as this enormous high schooler held you like a lifeline in his arms.

Then your lungs ruined the moment because the needed air, stupid ass lungs. Fuck you lungs! You ruined it!

You both panted, not quite wanting to meet each others eyes quite yet(because neither of you are good at ANY social interaction, but who is), but you leaned your head onto his.

"So, you're my girlfriend now right?" He asked.

"I...uhh..I guess so."

"....I don't think I'll be able to walk you to classes like I'm supposed to."

You could care less.

[that-house]

Hey so I hit 100 followers today!

Buckle up, this is gonna be a LOOOONG post.

I quite honestly expected it (while my ego is a little smaller than my jokes make it out to be it is definitely present), I didn’t expect it to happen so fast.

It’s not an insane milestone, plenty of people have 100 followers. A hefty portion of my followers are bigger than me. But it’s still important to me. Knowing that there’s 100 people out there who enjoy my shit makes me happy.

First and foremost the credit quite honestly has to go to ahegao George Washington. No, I’m not joking. Until I posted on r/tumblr about my desire to draw that, I had 0 followers. I jumped to like 10 overnight, which was awesome. And then those new followers helped me spread my posts and get more attention.

Secondly I’d like to shoutout @imaverysadgirl and @themeaninglessjumble. You two were my first real tumblr frens. You were the first of my followers to really interact with me. Ember, I’m super happy you’re alive to see me hit 100 followers. Jumble (I don’t know your name unless I forgot it), your art and creations are great and you deserve way more attention.

To all the rest of you, you guys are great, too. Every new follower makes me happy. I’d say I don’t deserve you all, but my colossal ego says I do. Regardless, being nemesi and getting called out for being horny on main and sending and receiving asks has made this last month or so great.

Finally, for all the shit it gets, and for all the shit it pulls, [tumblr] really is pretty dope. I got to meet you all, and it’s actively making me a better person by exposing me to groups of people I’d rarely interact with in real life.

Why does it feel like I’m saying goodbye? I’m not, don’t worry. I plan to stay, and neither death nor pain shall drive me from this hellsite. I’m just saying thanks.

Now with the thanks out of the way, I want to talk about myself a little. Just the stuff that I’ve always wanted to say and never quite gathered my thoughts and found the time to talk about.

You’re gonna get to know me so well! This is like a mini autobiography!

First off, my mental health. This is something I don’t talk about much on this blog, mostly because it doesn’t need much talking about. I’m doing pretty well, to be honest. I have a smattering of anxiety and I’m maybe a little too introverted for my own good, but I’m not suffering from depression and the only time I ever even remotely considered suicide was when I just really really didn’t want to go to French class. COVID has been great for me, since I don’t have to see people. I suppose I’m not a great person to talk to if you’re struggling with depression or suicidal thoughts, seeing as I can’t personally relate, but I’m still always here for you guys if you need me. Just because I haven’t lived through your experiences doesn’t mean I can’t try to help.

Next up I want to talk about my sexuality. This one’s a bit of a mystery. For the past 16 years of my life I’ve considered myself 100% straight. But lately (let’s be honest, following the release of Spirit Blossom Thresh) I’ve been wondering if I might be bi. How many times can I joke about wanting to smash sexy boys before it’s not really a joke anymore? And if I am, a lot of things would suddenly make a lot of sense. But every time I think I have it figured out it suddenly feels like I have no clue what’s going on. Regardless, my sexuality has honestly never been a massive part of my identity (though I’m definitely not asexual, my friends can attest I’m far too horny for that). I have no clue if I’m bi and for now it’s kind of a fun little adventure!

I guess I’ll talk about school and stuff now. Believe it or not, I’m kinda smart. I’m taking a shitton of AP courses this year. But I simultaneously feel like it’s too much and not enough. I’m smart, but I’m not a great student. Compared to my dad, who graduated college with a 3.98 GPA (and his only B being in History of Canada as an American) and now has a super well-paying government STEM job that he loves, I feel like even if I work my ass off I’ll never quite measure up. And my parents have had super high expectations of me, and it’s only recently that they’ve started to accept that I might get some B’s here and there. I’m worried about all the homework this year. I’m a year ahead in Math but I don’t feel good enough at math to be taking AP calculus junior year. I’m worried I’m going to get like a C. But for the most part school is alright, too. That’s sort of the trend in my life. Everything’s alright.

Time to talk about my love life! I have no love life! I’ve been single for 17 years and probably stand no chance of changing that until at least college! Haha I’m so alone! But I can live with it. Growing up an only child with a few friends means that I’m pretty good at functioning without a ton of social interaction, and, while I’d like a partner someday, I’m not desperate. I can wait until I find someone. Pretty much my goal is not to die alone.

Onto sports maybe? I played soccer for most of my life, and was always the worst player on the select team. I was too good for the normal team and not good enough for the select team (kinda like math). Soccer was really toxic, especially when you’re the worst player on a team of high school jock drug addict boys. So I quit, and started playing frisbee! It’s a lot better. The people are nicer! But my first season never happened because of COVID and now I’m in my Junior year and haven’t played much frisbee! So I kinda suck! But I’m physically fit and that’s good enough for me! On my own time I bike and run to stay in shape.

Are you still with me? Now I’m gonna talk about my hobbies and things!

I’ve been playing video games for a long time. I kinda suck at them to be totally honest. I probably have below-average reaction time, and my parents only let me play 15 minutes a day for most of my childhood, so I have a lot less practice than most of my friends. I’m pretty slick with Swain in LoL tho.

This next part is borderline shameless self-promotion, but since the Kickstarter isn’t live yet I guess it doesn’t count. I’m making a tabletop role playing game! I’ve been working on it for the past few years. My goal is to launch the Kickstarter prior to my college applications, because that’ll look sexy as fuck to potential colleges. It’s a post-apocalyptic sci-fi game where you play as supersoldiers trying to reconquer the wastelands of Earth for humanity. I’ll do a big post on it when I launch the Kickstarter, and I guess that’ll also be a full name reveal (kinda spooky since my full name is ENTIRELY unique and one-of-a-kind. More ego boost lmao).

And finally I want to talk about my art and writing. I’ll start with my drawing, and finish off with my writing, since that’s what I’d most like to be known for on here (but that’ll never happen because my caveman brain shitposts are too funny).

So I’ve been doodling for a long time. I briefly got formal art training but sacrificing my Saturday mornings to draw what someone else wanted me to make so that I could make better stuff in the future didn’t appeal to my 8-year-old brain. I draw in the margins of worksheets. I draw on random sheets of paper. Recently my parents bought me a drawing tablet, and I’ve been trying to improve at digital art. I’d say I’m getting better, but I don’t practice nearly enough. All in all my art serves its purpose. It makes people laugh and can sometimes creep people out. It’ll never go in a museum, and I’ll never make money off of it but whatever.

And finally, my writing.

How can I talk about writing without talking about reading? I’ve likely read more books than both my parents combined, and if not, it’s close (and my mom is a prolific reader too). I have three bookshelves in my room and books on every surface. You can’t follow me for long without seeing a post ranting about my latest read. I love to read and I read incredibly fast. Reading spurred my love of English class, which in turn helped me write.

And finally, we get to writing in and of itself. I’ve been writing stories since I was a little kid. I’d like to think I’ve improved a fair bit. I’m still no novelist, but I consider myself a fairly adept short story writer.

But I suppose where my writing really stems from is my bed. Every night while I’m lying in bed, I tell myself stories until I fall asleep. I work on a story until it’s done or until I get bored of it. Along the way, in the shower, on my bike, I build the world of the story, crafting the plot. Sometimes the stories are elaborate fanfictions of my latest reads. That’s probably how they started. Often, they’re unique worlds all of their own. My current writing posts are about the City of Mammon, but my current story in my head is about some vampires who hunt other vampires in Victorian England.

And now we get into the process of writing. It’s fun! I sit myself down with an idea in my head, and use all the fancy words I picked up from my books to convey the vibes I want. I honestly wouldn’t be a great writing teacher. It’s just a skill that comes naturally to me as a result of what I’ve been doing with my free time my whole life. And it’s beautiful. And every time someone compliments my writing or reblogs it, I love writing just a little bit more.

Well I guess this is it. The 100 follower special. I wonder how many of you guys will take the time out of your day to read this. Hopefully a lot!

James (or That House) signing off for the night!

<3 thanks guys

[samueldays]

“Democracy is when you promote immigration and transgenderism. The more you promote immigration and transgenderism, the more democratic you are.” -pseudonymous internet shitposter

The above came up as a commentary on the latest crock of shit that is Freedom House’s democracy rankings, where we are told that Hungary has left the group of democracies entirely. This is patent nonsense.

As best I can tell, Freedom House is stubbornly refusing to use a thesaurus or read any political science tract more complex than ‘DEMOCRACY GOOD’, because FH is using the word “democracy” as a catch-all for every good thing they like in a government or state, such as an independent judiciary. The lack of an independent judiciary, according to FH, is undemocratic. In their own words:

Antidemocratic leaders in the region continue to pay lip service to the skeletal, majoritarian element of democracy—claiming that they act according to the will of the people—but they do so only to justify their concentration of power and escalating violations of political rights and civil liberties.

The skeletal, majoritarian element of democracy. What a wonderfully evocative, emotive phrase. What a fascinating way to brush off the defining element of democracy.

Dear Freedom House - you don’t appear to have a tumblr, so I don’t know if you’ll read this, but it’s mostly my rant to the world at large and setting my own thoughts in order anyway - read another book, and get a bigger vocabulary. Hold a rectification of names. Practice using phrases like civil society, liberalism and constitutionalism, and learn about how they are distinct things from democracy. Stop using “democratic” to mean what you like, and “undemocratic” to mean what you don’t like, you God-damned emotivists. Cut the ridiculous hyperbole. Look at the Hungarian parliament, for example. Look at it, rather than trying to brush it away with colorful pejoratives.

[Illustration from Wikipedia: Seats in the Hungarian national assembly, featuring a majority center-right party, and minority center-left, far-left and far-right parties.]

There’s several more minor parties that didn’t make the cut to get a seat. This flourishing multiparty system with free elections, Freedom House calls undemocratic because the two-thirds majority governing coalition (orange + supporters) is getting its way and the very small minority parties are not getting their way. Freedom House puts it this way:

Prime Minister Viktor Orbán’s government in Hungary has similarly dropped any pretense of respecting democratic institutions.

The supermajority ruling coalition IS THE DEMOCRATIC INSTITUTION, you midwits, that the other institutions ought to be the ones respecting!

Here is Freedom House’s seven-factor measure of good government, which they call a measure of “democracy”, probably because that’s the magic word which roots many people’s brains.

National Democratic Governance. Considers the democratic character of the governmental system; and the independence, effectiveness, and accountability of the legislative and executive branches.

Electoral Process. Examines national executive and legislative elections, the electoral framework, the functioning of multiparty systems, and popular participation in the political process.

Civil Society. Assesses the organizational capacity and financial sustainability of the civic sector; the legal and political environment in which it operates; the functioning of trade unions; interest group participation in the policy process; and the threat posed by antidemocratic extremist groups.

Independent Media. Examines the current state of press freedom, including libel laws, harassment of journalists, and editorial independence; the operation of a financially viable and independent private press; and the functioning of the public media.

Local Democratic Governance. Considers the decentralization of power; the responsibilities, election, and capacity of local governmental bodies; and the transparency and accountability of local authorities.

Judicial Framework and Independence. Assesses constitutional and human rights protections, judicial independence, the status of ethnic minority rights, guarantees of equality before the law, treatment of suspects and prisoners, and compliance with judicial decisions.

Corruption. Looks at public perceptions of corruption, the business interests of top policymakers, laws on financial disclosure and conflict of interest, and the efficacy of anticorruption initiatives.

Lots of things in that list that sound great, I’m sure. But if you haven’t been conditioned to reflexively cheer when you hear “democracy”, you might notice some odd things about this list.

For example, the points awarded for legislative independence, executive independence, press independence, and judicial independence. Without here getting into the reactionary weeds of whether or not these things ought to exist, can we at least recognize that there’s some double-counting going on here?

Moreover, the judicial independence in particular is smuggling in a very particular definition of democracy since it’s precisely the will of the people, the elected bodies and the [spongebob voice] ‘mAjoRITariaNISM’ that the judiciary is normally expected to be independent of. Again, “democracy” is being used as a catch-all applause-light.

Then there’s that bit about human rights protections, a loophole of vagueness wide enough to drive a tank through, as well as being a kind of definitional security hole where a country’s supposed democratic-ness can be altered without altering any trait of the country itself, only altering the benchmark. Hocus pocus, I added a new human right, your country is now less democratic because your people didn’t vote for it!

Libel laws are another standout element that have a lot to do with good governance, and little to do with “democracy”, where it is very easy to imagine the people getting dinged for undemocracy because they voted the wrong way.

Let’s go back to that point about press freedom and editorial independence for a moment. Meditate on it. Then consider Freedom House complaining out of the other side of its mouth later in the same report:

In Central and Eastern European countries, Chinese diplomats have been given free rein to publish misleading op-eds that push a pro-China narrative.

Here, let me put that in a larger context screenshot:

“Weak or nonexistent democratic institutions.” As if it weren’t bad enough for Fuckwit House to conflate democratic with free press, Fartsniff House then complains the free press is simultaneously undemocratic when the Chinese get a turn at it.

The quip at the top is probably inspired by this sentence from Freedom House’s report:

In the EU, member states’ failure to tackle rule-of-law violations inside the bloc has been coupled with a slow erosion of the rights of migrants and asylum seekers.

[to-dance-beneath-the-diamond-sky]

I posted 5,583 times in 2022

That's 917 more posts than 2021!

105 posts created (2%)

5,478 posts reblogged (98%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@cheeseanonioncrisps

@araccoonthatlikesmurder

@bunjywunjy

@alone-to-dance

@goodgrammaritan

I tagged 709 of my posts in 2022

#lmao - 66 posts

#read later - 39 posts

#to read - 38 posts

#for later - 38 posts

#come back to this - 37 posts

#lol - 35 posts

#marcus mumford - 24 posts

#please - 19 posts

#mumford & sons - 18 posts

#show amanda - 17 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#i don’t know if it counts as being passive aggressive actually since they’re not on tumblr and there’s zero chance they would ever see this

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

What the fuck the England team looks like shit how the fuck are they making the US look so good?!? This is embarrassing

23 notes - Posted November 25, 2022

#4

So I saw Gang of Youths in concert last week and it was fucking amazing holy shiiitttt. I’m still processing lmao but holy fuck it was so good

24 notes - Posted May 19, 2022

#3

I’m losing my shit the official tumblr blue check mark trolling is peak tumblr energy of shitpost in the extreme and I fucking love it lmfaooo

28 notes - Posted November 10, 2022

#2

for any of y’all still on twitter who wanna help contribute to elon musk getting the fuck sued out of him for copyright infringement...

30 notes - Posted November 20, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

there is a very specific kind of rage i feel whenever i watch a movie or tv adaptation of a book. i am, what the kids call, a book purist. if they wanted to make a totally different story then they should have made a totally different story and not used the name and character names of the book. fuck all the way off. if you liked a book enough to make a film/tv adaptation then you shouldn’t butcher it by ruining every little thing in the actual book. you should actually try to tell the fucking story through a different medium. i fucking hate film/tv adaptations of books. 

38 notes - Posted April 1, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[princess-of-embarrassment]

Some 3 am realizations about life, relationships and maybe more?? idk whatever have fun.

Ok before i start on this shit I am going to say it is 3 am and i am just dumping some thoughts like i usually do. Sorry for the shit grammar, disorganized thoughts and all that jazz... In a sense i feel like this is a letter to myself and what i have been trying so damn hard to understand so yeah i am talking to myself and to this website. I think. Idk. i will probably delete this in the morning when i am back on bad bitch mode and go back to posting memes pero por ahora vamos a ver como nos va. Mayb ei will leave it up bc i forget or because i dont care who sees it. sorry for the shitshow of a post you are about to read but you probably already kinda know me so yay! I debated posting this shit because the internet is a wildin place but oh well!!1!!11

ok tumblr it is 3 in the morning and i have 100% regressed into being a 15 years old on this damn website shitposting and reblogging some corny ass posts but it feels right, so here i am attempting to process it through the only form i know how to actually know how to cope with things. I mean memes are cool and all but lets be real, they don’t address the problems. this is the one place i can brain dump all of my thoughts and not really care about where they go because they will eventually disappear in the tumblr algorithm.

My old blog was often the only separation I had between my reality and the life i really wished i had, but now I have that life that I always wanted so why the hell am i back at square one? To be fair, the life that i have right now may not be envied by many but its a pretty darn good life to me. Im safe 99.9% of the time. The other .1% is a story for another day. I have been trying to figure out for months as to why i’m back to being so active on here and now that it’s 3:00am I realize it’s because of self isolation (thanks corona!). 

Let me start off by saying this; my reality is not something I am going to be able to escape. Ever. It has brought me to where i am today, allowed me to meet some really incredible people and i am so so grateful. I have learned so much in the past few years. i am grateful what happened happened. Wild, i know. I escaped it physically but i cannot escape it mentally, at least for now. School, work, writing, dealing with my freshmen’s problems was what kept my brain occupied and away from having to face the part of my life that I really just want to forget. To be fait my trauma response has taken pretty good care of fucking up my memory and all of those fun things but ironically the things i want to forget about so badly are the things i think about every single day without skipping a beat. brains are weird like that.

I am ok now but sometimes i forget and fall back into my new reality. That is ok. People that know my story ask me why i don’t write about it on a public platform because it’s inspiring?? or hopeful?? or whatever cliche people want to use when addressing a topic that makes them uncomfortable and they want to feel better about the life they live. 21 year old latina girl faces adversity and lives the american dream (barely)..i mean, i did run a whole ass magazine and wrote a piece for graduation including some details of my story but that was like the rated g version with only the little sad parts that people are able to handle without feeling like their comfort zone is being violated. MEdia is a wonderful place isnt it???  so i get where they are coming from, but what they dont understand is that an international platform is not where i can share any of these thoughts... Listen, I know this is cryptic and confusing and you are probably really curious about what the hell happened to me but i don’t feel safe to type it out on international platforms with public access. I don’t know if i ever will... Yeah i can talk to people i trust about it because i am in control of the space and the situation and who is obtaining that information but you never really know with the internet. 

maybe in the future i’ll write a book on it. even then i will probably use my alias make it a YA fiction with an added love story that ends in a happy ending. Maybe one day one of the school girl crushes I have will turn into that YA story and i dont have to make any of it up.

If i am honest...this blog is the only safe place i will probably ever have where he wont find me. He can find my school and my address and phone number and work and everything in between because that is just the way things work. Yeah yeah i get it stop posting shit on social media that is how he finds you whatever. What people dont understand is that I cant stop living my life again. I already started so i cant go back to giving him that power. It makes no sense. Also, his family is too confused by all of the ups and downs of the last year that they dont really know where i am going or what i am doing. So anyways, long story short - That’s why i am back on here, because it has become the same written safe haven I had when i was 15 and tried to escape my physical reality. Only difference is that i am trying to manage the mental reality of it all...

I also have so many questions about what to do next. Like i mentioned in another post, i didnt think i would make it to 21 but i did. I didnt think this far ahead so i guess i will just figure it out along the way but hear me out. How do i face a new reality that no one can relate to. At least not the people around me. How do i make friends and know when the “right time” is to tell them hey btw if this happens lmk lol. Even more importantly (because it relates to my future as world famous YA novelist.. lol sure grace...) How do I even date someone??? many questions are tied to that. like... I know theyre going to ask. “what happened?” “who is it?” “how can i help?” “Isnt there something we can do?”. i am more than willing to answer these questions because fuck, if im dating someone i would be curious too.. but do i even answer those questions. How do i know they are ready to handle that kind of information? how can i guarantee theyre not going to leave. How can i know that they arent going to be frightened by what has happened. how do i know they are not going to think differently of me. How do i explain to this person “yeah i have stress nightmares about what happened and when i wake up i think i am back in that situation and not where i live and i have to remind myself i am in a whole different area code but then its fine lol so if we share a bed at any point in time dont be alarmed if i wake up in a panic.” or how do i explain to them when something triggers me and all i can do is freeze because maybe it is him. Maybe he finally found me. but then i am back to reality and move on with my day because that is the only thing left to do. I cant throw myself a shitty pity party thats generic as fuck and i dont have time for it but whatever. moving on. next question. How do i know theyre not gonna walk away because they have the misconception so many people have?? Just because i went through some shit doesnt mean i am unstable or unloveable or whatever bs people think. This isnt going to go away. This shit is a aprt of me but it doesn not define me. it is not who i am.I dont have the option to make it go away but people have the option to pick up their things and go. seems unfair to me sometimes. It seems unfair to generalize people like that. I am always open to a new relationship but people expect me to be sitting at home scared to go out into the world and live my life. I have a life to live and i am so ready to explore it by myself or with someone by my side but quarantine has brought me back on here to deal with the fact that i am back to being stuck inside. Mentally and physically. One sucks less than the other. 

I have so many other questions but i am feeling tired again and its almost 4am so maybe i should go to bed. Y’all dont know how happy i am to have this trash site to vent to in the middle of the night. theres some relly judgy people on here but at least i know my feed wont judge me or try to fix what has happened. it will just listen.

Anyways, i doubt anyone will read this because this post got long as fuck but if you did i give you a high five and a virtual hug for getting through the clusterfuck of sentences. Thanks tumblr. If i ever go viral again on this shitshow of a website i may have to bring back my studyblr and go underground lmfao jk maybe. I cant wait to hug my friends and the people i have met that have become a part of my daily routine (yes even during social isolation, get off my ass I am still socially isolating). All i can do for now is wait for someone who cares about me for me and isn’t scared of my past or the pieces of it that linger in my present. I deserve nothing less. if they cant do that they are not worth my time and i hope they drop their keys every single time they go to open their front door. oh... they also better be ready for the hours i spend typing away my thoughts on my computer. Maybe one day they will be allowed to read them too... lol maybe not. whatever who knows. Peace out kiddos stay healthy xoxo.