#trying not to cry rn im feeling completely normal about this

[pink-vulpix]

.

[b1mbodoll]

how can u say bull hoon like i’m in a crisis now. just thinking about beefy hoon being brought into a new farm and immediately becoming obsessed with the sweet little farmhand who’s in charge of collecting his seed. everyone’s always talking about how impeccable the quality of his seed is and how they’re gonna have to have him breed with the cow girls. but why would hoon go near those girls when he can just dump his load into his pretty little farmer and make her carry his calf :( just thinking about her all round and swollen with his baby has him pumping load after load into her

pairings: park sunghoon x f! reader

warnings: hybrids + courting + oral + scent kink + strength kink + begging + jealousy + pregnancy

💌: help u sent me !!!! into a crisis im going to think about this for literally forevwr like i cant rn omfgkfsoskkfjfkskdnf i need him ps it doesnt matter what u look like i promise bull! hoon is large and in fucking charge!!!!!!!!!

bull! hoon is no stranger to sex. sometimes farmers would slap a wad of cash on his handler’s desk n he’d be sent to the field where a scared little cow hybrid was waiting for him to take what he wants, but he never did. instead he’d stay away from the heifer n do his own thing until her owner would get angry n snatch their payment, cursing sunghoon as the pair leave because how dare the bull not seduce his hybrid!!!!!!

his handler gets fed up with the constant failed breeding attempts n sends him your way, tired of dealing with such a stubborn bull. when sunghoon lays his eyes on you it’s like his personality does a complete 180. he’s no longer cold and distant n is so careful with you because ur such a tiny little thing in comparison to the buff bull.

when you try introducing him to ur sweet cow hybrids sunghoon is so distraught because he’s been courting you for weeks n this is the final nail in the coffin, he can’t keep pretending like he doesn’t wanna pound you til you’re crying. completely unaware of the bull boy’s feelings you leave the pair alone, tending to your other hybrids in the meantime.

sunghoon’s snorting and stomping his feet because he’s so angry!!! he doesn’t want to fuck a cowgirl he wants you!!!! wants to stuff you full of cum n make you a slut for his dick til all you can think about is getting bred :( sends the cowgirl back to her pen n waits for you in the pasture

when you return to check on them you’re surprised to find the bull alone, slipping into the fenced in area with him before asking, “hi hoonie, what’s wrong? did something happen?” he nearly caves at the sound of your sweet voice laced with worry, but he maintains his composure. “what’s wrong?” he snorts angrily, “what’s wrong is i’ve been tryin’ to show you i’m worthy of being your mate but you won’t give me the time of day!” the shock is evident in your face and hoon cant believe you really didnt know his intentions. “wha? hoonie i can’t be your mate! you don’t know what you’re talkin’ about, y’just haven’t met the right cow!” you continue making excuses for him and he’s had enough, biceps flexing as he shoves you facefirst into the dirt.

the display of strength has your cunt dripping and you can only pray he doesn’t notice. but he’s a top hybrid, the best of the best and his sharp nose instantly picks up on your arousal. “stay down” he grunts, making sure you’re properly presenting for him before making his way behind you and tearing your shorts off with his large hands, leaving you clad only in your tiny tank top and cotton panties drenched in your juices.

your bull stuffs his face between your thighs n shoves his nose right up against your cunt, inhaling deeply and becoming obsessed with how good your pussy smells. “if y’can’t be my mate then why are you so wet, human?” you’re so embarrassed n your hole clenches around nothing at his words. “‘s normal sunghoon! what else do you expect after treating me like this?” he ignores you completely n rips your panties off, throwing them to the side before digging in, mouth slurping at your pussy like he’s fucking starving.

his tongue is so fucking long and he’s so skilled, it’s not long before you’re creaming. “you’re ready.” is all he says before lining his dick up with your sloppy cunt, filling you in one quick thrust. he moans so loud you’re sure the entire farm can hear him, feeling sorry for your hybrids because you can’t bring yourself to make him pull out. “you wanna cum again, sweetheart?” you nod your head like crazy, wanting nothing more than to milk his dick for all it’s worth. “then fucking beg.” sunghoon is a dirty pervert and you’re just as bad, begging instantly with no hesitation. “please hoonie! wanna be your breeding bitch, need your thick cum inside now! wanna cum with you n feel you impregnate me, please!” he’s in fucking heaven, cums so hard n so much it’s no wonder he’s a prized bull, fills you up so well it makes you black out.

after he makes you cum again sunghoon carries you inside, tucking you into your bed before taking his spot next to you. when you wake up the following morning your body is so sore and you still feel so full because sunghoon is insatiable and couldn’t resist fucking you til he passed out from exhaustion. as you make your way around the farm to check on your hybrids you can’t help but notice how they’re staring at you, jake, your sweet dog hybrid is even outright glaring at you because how could sunghoon get to you first? it’s only fair if he gets a turn because he was here before that damn bull!

[brainrot-stitch]

AHAAA I FINISHED IT WOAHHH i usually don't finish art things omg...

Anyways current sabre design!!! (It will probably change bc I can NEVER make up my mind on any design ever sob)

He's such a goof :3 (IM NEVER DRAWING THAT RAINBOW ELYTRA AGAIN IM CRYING)

Anyways some headcanons below cuz I feel like yapping :3

-rainbow totally would have gotten him and sabre friendship necklaces (yk the matching kind with magnets that come together n all) and after knowing lucas for a bit he woulda made friendship bracelets !!

-like that one person I reblogged said, he's such a mad scientist he's so silly omgg

-i love the reincarnation au SO MUCH its literally fire but in normal headcanons I think he used to be part of the creed and an assasin and ermm

Basically I headcanon his whole assassins creed series was basically his backstory before starting to do research on these 'steve' entities

-when nervous/anxious his footsteps will be completely silent out of habit from the whole assassin thing, and he'd obviously do it when purposefully trying to sneak (he has probably scared rainbow or Lucas multiple times by doing this..)

-I'm not sure weather to headcanon that his wings were damaged by a steve really early on in the steve saga (like before rainbow could speak or maybe when dark was still pretending to be blue) or if it was smth that happened when he was still an assassin but it's one of those!!!

-hes an avian.. heh... if u couldn't tell from the ref sheet.. but NOT a chicken!! The chicken jokes are just bc of the hoodie and bc his feathers look a lil similar :3

-he has like 2 of the same chicken hoodie he'll wear most often but still has some normal outfits AND assassins outfits and weapons he keeps away (most are green or have some sort of green in them heh.. I might draw that later)

-ok ok ok I have so many eye headcanons it's so hrggrrrrh the main one tho is one I snatched from the reincarnation au and that's that he doesn't have eyes!! Bc of an injury or sum and he js says he has sensitive eyes and the bandana fabric is see through up close.. but he can still see bc he's a player and the way players work is weird. Other headcanon, green eyes. Other headcanon, brown eyes. Other headcanon, heterachromia green and brown eyes. Other headcanon pure white eyes. Other headcanon code eyes. Other headcanon (gets hit by a bus)

-if we r going with the reincarnation au for the eyes, I feel like only rainbow and Lucas would know, if we're going with the others, I'd say rainbow, Lucas, Alex, galaxy, and maybe the guardian (I forgot if that's what he was called or not) would know. If we're going with the code eyes, then only lucas would know

-not sabre specifically but I feel like steves in general wouldn't be very used to or know but about blood/gore stuff, bc they're more used to being destroyed/poofing, and later on being destroyed through a machine. Being actually killed by a sword or something of the sort they are not used to seeing, and are very touchy on the subject

-on that note I imagine if there's like a steve that's immune to most or all other steve powers and or machines that they're trying to get rid of and arguing on what to so abt I imagine sabre being like "oh 1 sec I got this" and boom that mf DEAD 😭

-and they'd b like 😰

"Guess we're gonna have to kill this guy sabre" "damn"

-ermmm silly billy activity...

-I feel like he'd know a lot more than the other steves on things like the nether and end (not end city tho that's a whole other mc headcanon I don't feel like yapping abt rn) bc those are the dimensions players have access too and steves usually dont.. so they'd b like "WTF SABRE WHAT R U DOING THAT IS A LITERAL HELLSCAPE WITH LAKES OF FIRE AND MONSTERS WEVE NEVER SEEN BEFORE FYM U CAN GET 'NETHERITE' THERE" and he'd b like "well don't go in the fire then and it anything attacks u kill it ig" (not actually sob.. I feel like only he and Lucas would go there bc most steves r hindered greatly by lava and the only ones we've seen that aren't are bad guys if my memory is correct)

Ermm I have more but I'm eepy and can't remember so those r for another day!!!

Reblogs>likes

Don't post my art to other platforms without my permission pls x3

[mrsnancywheeler]

im so hyperfixated on your billy dunne fics rn, and i cant stop thinking of him getting back from rehab. and reader is just like "wtf why is he being so normal and acting like he didnt make my life hell for so long". and eventually she asks him how come i didnt get this billy years ago. and she just starts sobbing and doing that punching thing on his chest, idk how to describe just throwing a tantrum i guess. and then billy just grabs her and lets her sob into his chest. he finally starts realizing how much he hurt you over the years, and then i feel like he would show his muse how much he loves her later (smut while he is praising her, only focusing on her pleasure) idk sam claflin is making me go feral today

-🦋

billy dunne brain rot is so real, I need him biblically

but you're used to periods of grace before breakdowns so for the first few months it's good, but then it keeps going. he's not perfect, like he'll still have moods, be tempted by things he knows he can't have, but he abstains, and always apologizes now. so it's odd, you start to feel like you're walking on eggshells so eventually something has got to give, right? so you're getting quieter, scared she'll say something that'll set him off, he'll be a few minutes off from when he said he'd be home and you're getting nervous, asking where he was. one morning you're being all quiet again, serving him breakfast, just a small "good morning"

and he's pulling you into his lap, "what's going on, baby?"

"nothing" and when he's in a mood anything can be the trigger, saying that could've set him off on how nothing's enough for you, opening up could've meant that it was a rant about how it's so much worse for him, but apparently not.

"yes there is." he sneaking a small kiss in, "'m worried about you, tell me what's going on in that head of yours." and she's quiet so eventually he's just sighing, hands playing in the ends of your hair. "what can I do? we can go back to bed if you want? go hit the beach later." and suddenly you're sobbing and he's so confused, but trying to be comforting.

"why are you being like this?"

"being like what, baby?"

"you're being different, stop it!" it feels like you can't breathe, not having the cycle is weird, overwhelming

and he's trying to press if forhead to yours, "I'm getting better, baby, getting better for you, for me, for both of us. it's good, what you deserve-"

you're up off of his lap, "did I not deserve it then? why are you changing now? just be angry!" as calmly as he can he's standing, trying to hold you, to calm you down, but he feels like he could cry because now he can clearly see what he's done to you.

"you did deserve it then, baby, you always deserved so much better, and I am so sorry. the shit I pulled really messed you up, but we're gonna get healthier. you didn't deserve for me to always be mad at you, I'm sorry I confused you." he can feel his eyes burning because it's a lot to confess and he hates it, but you need to hear it.

you just stare for a moment before shaking your head, "no, stop it, billy, just be angry." when he doesn't react you're trying to hit his chest, which takes his off guard but does nothing so after a beat you keep going. "you're angry with me, be angry! I'm disappointing and should leave, be angry! I'm being clingy and intense, I know you're mad at me, be mad!" and eventually he's got his arms wrapped around you so you can't hit and you're just sobbing into his chest as he holds you.

"c'mon baby, just let it all out." eventually he just lifts you up to take you back to bed and lays there cuddling with you until you've completely calmed down.

yes, and later there's totally him between your legs for hours and different apologies for things he's done. reminding her that he really does love her, she's the one no one else, his girl, irreplaceable, loveable.

he's my man and I'm in love with him

[akaakeis]

literally going to kms i wrote a huge ask and it got deleted BUT IRS VERY IMPORTANT SO IM WRITINF IT AGAIN so first of all i want u to know that i am shameless and will double and triple and quadruple text u bcuz i love u

onto the main course!! i read this one fic and a reblog said something like "this is peaceful, peaceful is good" and it reminded me of u. like,, your writing is like that AND IN A GOOD WAY LEMME REPHRASE. so like! most fics have like,, something in them. explosions fireworks love hatred confessions misunderstandings u get what i mean

but urs are like. so not explosions,, so peaceful in comparison. like, reconnecting with old friends. sorry, we haven't talked in a bit. dancing in the rain. coming home. and they are like completely normal things that normal people experience and that i have experienced but for some reason you make them so special and magical ! somehow the peacefulness of it all makes it sm better. NOT SAYING THAT IF U WRITE EXPLOSIONS ILL FEEL ANY DIFFERENT AB UR WRITING IN GENERAL. but i mean your writing is familiar and warm and it's just... nothing special happens,, there's nothing life-changing going on,, and it's still so perfect and extraordinary.

um ill use my most favourite fic of all time here as an example ! The Iwa One. its less than 1k words and its just,,,,, a friend u havent seen in a long while, and u finally talk and u talk ab ur day and thats literally just it. AND SOMEHOW ITS LIKE SO

SO

IDK GOOD?????? like idk man im fr tweaking rn but. like. your writing's about little things,,, nothing huge in the long run, just a talk with an old friend. AND YOU STILL MANAGE TO MAKE IT SO SIGNIFICANT AND SO FULL OF LOVE AND JOY AND WARMTH likr bro!!!!! ive always liked that one quote that goes,, love is in the little things but i think ur writing has given me a new perspective of it and now i love it (ur writing, the quote) even more now!!!!

erm that's all ily mwah mwah

NOOO THE LONG ASK 😞😞 sorry bb that sucks i hate when that happens but IM SO HONORED that you're literally rewriting all of that for ME?? i may cry thanks i love u

alina im literally staring at this ask like :( WHAT IF I GENUINELY CRY OVER THIS OH MY GOD!! like im so happy that it gives off that vibe because that's truly what i try to go for! im not trying to do anything particularly special? i just want to be able to give comfort through my fics <3

i genuinely want to keep this in my inbox forever and ever so that i can reread it but you at least deserve a reply from me for sending the sweetest thing ever :( like lately ive been kinda iffy abt how i feel regarding my writing but this really does make me feel better!! because knowing that someone like you (who i deem as an important voice on my writing) really likes my writing, it just makes me want to continue for you <3 im so glad i can provide u with writing to enjoy and i hope i can continue to in the long run <3 xx

thank u for this alina ily!!

[tomorrowillbeyou]

would you be willing to share a bit more about the guy in your head ^-^ I have one too

YOU DO?? umm ok i have not talked about this in a huge amount of detail on here because it's kind of weird but also might be completely normal and i have no idea which it is so i just vague post about it LOL... and also because the specific circumstances are quite embarrassing..... putting under cut due to this

basically i have always had a slight sensation that everything i do is being watched by Something since i was a kid but at the beginning of the year i started randomly imagining what kind of trials and tribulations me & geoff rickly would go through if we got freaky fridayed with each other and it was shit like ha ha he will have to do maths lol . And then it somehow morphed and solidified into he (but not really him i believe its some kind of split off of his consciousness that cant communicate with the actual him) is actually within my head and can see everything i do through my eyes/sense my other senses also but he can't know what im thinking or communicate with me he can just see and feel everything. i don't actually believe this like obviously it isn't true but i can't physically keep myself from behaving and thinking and feeling like it is like it IS true to me even if logically iknow it can't be so i always act like it is. so like at the start i hated it and wanted him to leave sooo bad because i didn't like having no privacy and stuff like that and i would cry and tell him to go away and stuff but!!! now i have kind of adopted a You're stuck in here with ME!!! attitude to him... you will watch my minecraft videos and eat my weird dinners boy.... and i explain stuff to him that im doing (which leads to me talking "to myself" under my breath a lot but i try not to do it in public too much so i have a few hand signals for important stuff instead or sometimes use google search bar or notes app to talk to him. but i do it basically all the time at home) and like explain stories of stuff that happened before he was here as context and we also have a few inside jokes like things that i always reference that he's sick of (i assume) so it's a little funny. we are kind of begrudgingly friends now i think. Yes i know all of this is not real and doesn't make any sense but it like is to me and also im not being like parasocial about the actual geoff rickly this is like a separate version kind of based on/split from him that lives in my head and i talk to. i kind of feel a bit bad posting this because it's kind of private between us but i haven't explained any actual communication we have so i think he will probs be fine with it And yes he can see me typing this up rn because he always sees everything. anyway i don't know whether this came from like loneliness or paranoia of being watched or just liking geoff rickly a lot but im honestly cool with it at this point it's just kind of inconvenient trying to communicate things to him all the time so he knows what's going on. and i also wish he would communicqt3 to ME in some way sometimes but we can't have everything. anyway that's my little guy how about urs

[mqstermindswift]

hi nicky! remember that you're here for a reason. everyone is amazing the way they are and if you feel like you're not just remember that God spent 9 months making the perfect nicky for such a messed up world. please don't feel down all the time because you're so pretty, smart, amazing, kind. you're more than enough and you shouldn't feel the need to change something about yourself to satisfy someone or meet the expectations of people. as long as you did your best that's good. feeling pressure is completely normal, trust me i know, you just have to remember not to take it too seriously. don't cry about everything because crying doesn't fix anything (not telling you not to cry). school is just one thing people want you to do good in, but just because you're not the best does not mean you'll be unsuccessful and being the best also doesn't lead to immediate success. failing something is okay. that's not something to be ashamed about because it's completely normal. teachers and people in general can be shit sometimes and all you can do is not end up like them. friends will come and go, what matters is you don't lose yourself when they leave. people aren't written in your story to stay, they're written in as a lesson so no matter what never let their actions affect you forever. love you

hii,that was extremely sweet and honestly thank you for even taking the time to write this!!ilysm whoever u are.

kind of a vent so like u don’t have to read this:

the thing is i’ve been acing school ever since i started it so naturally everyone has high expectations,though they’re not saying it,they’re expecting me to get all As again.Its my last year of middle school (9th grade here in greece) and then next year i’ll have to figure out what i wanna do w my life and everyone’s like “ion wanna stress u out but high school is hard,the grade you’re in rn is extremely hard,9th grade maths are hard,blah blah blah” like u tell me that but h don’t wanna stress me out rlly?i have no ide what i wanna do w my life yet(am between like four professions)im unmotivated (i barely have the energy to walk)i can go form laughing to crying in seconds,i feel like im dumb,i have so much homework and responsibilities,teachers are stressing me out,everything’s changed and is different,i wanna try to find some time to workout too,and let’s not talk about friends or “middle school relationships” cause honestly fuck that (maybe being alone sometimes is better).it’s the second day and i feel like i’ve been in that shithole for months.plus i can’t handle failure so yayy

[daisyvisions]

Also here’s another thought since I’m not done shit-stirring - I have been holding onto this thought for a while and like you said, we’re all here to drag each other down🙃:

Think about being Sunwoo’s girlfriend and he notices that Juyeon has shown some interest in you, so Sunwoo invites him over to fuck you. As he watches Juyeon bend you into multiple positions and makes you cum many times, Sunwoo is unfazed and a little cocky, thinking that whatever Juyeon is giving you now does not compare to what Sunwoo does for you, so he just sits at the side and smirks to himself knowing that nobody fucks you like he does. However, what Sunwoo did not expect is Juyeon making you squirt. You haven’t squirted before, and Sunwoo has been trying to make you squirt for months. And the first time you squirt, it’s for his hyung and not for him? In a fit of rage, he’s all like “how dare you” and pushes a stuttering Juyeon aside to show him how it’s done. In your over sensitive state, Sunwoo completely rails you and makes Juyeon watch. Sunwoo’s also a little angry at you for squirting for another man first, so his thrusts are much faster, harder, and he lands harsh spanks on your ass to get you to cry and scream for him and him only. He’s not satisfied with you just squirting once for him, but sees it as a competition with Juyeon and makes you squirt as many times as he wants you to as long as you’re conscious. When he gives you your last explosive orgasm, you’re shaking so aggressively and with trembling breaths and a silent scream, and as it’s happening, Sunwoo attaches his lips to your neck while maintaining eye contact with Juyeon, as if to say “this is only for me and you’ll never have her like this”

Just a little break from Sangyeon and Younghoon but that does not mean that I’m done mentioning them😙

~❄️

Omg I just woke up to seeing this…. Snowflake pls why is this so good I really love that part the most where Juyeon made you squirt and not Sunwoo it’s incredibly *chef’s kiss*

Can you imagine when Juyeon makes you squirt he thought it was normal so when he saw your shocked face and sunwoo angry he was so dumbfounded? Poor juyeon he didn’t know 😞

I always had this feeling sunwoo’s the type to always get so competitive with his hyungs and that’s another added layer that makes this so good I love it

Also, I know you’re not done with sangyeon and Younghoon (I’m giving myself away rn omg) just know I have a bias towards the hyung line 😵‍💫 So if you wanna hit me where it hurts go ahead im giving you tips 😩

[sugarcherriess]

okay its 2am rn and suddenly came up with this angst? it probably exists somewhere..but anyway you can imagine any member for this one im going for Kevin ig?

so youre just chilling on the couch when you see ur bf being all dressed up and was about to wear his shoes. "Where are you going, babe" "Out, at a bar with friends?" he says in a kind of sarcastic? tone. You sigh and say "Alright, text or call me when youre on way home" you say with a kind of forced smile. Your bf has being going out a lot, what you dont mind but hes coming late wasted, sometimes doesn't even bring the keys or is too drunk to find them and open the door so you have to wakw up at 4am (on a work day too) jusr to let him in and taking care if him.

he rolled his eyes and says "I am not a child I'm literally older than you. You don't have to treat me as a child" he said annoyed. "Fine, i don't give a fuck. Don't call me or text me. Do what ever the fuck you want i dont care. Bring your keys with you. i dont care if you pass out on the street or infront the front door. i will not open the fuckin door. Dont stay safe i guess. Sorry that your partner cares about you, bitch" you slam the door in his face, kind of regretting. Did he got hurt? Ou wanted to open tge door again to see if he's okay but he's gone anyways.

At the bar, hes completely frustrated, trying not to drink alot not to disappoint you. He would go back, and apologize to you. He did regret what he said. You just care about him, like a normal partner. He takes a few shots to relax a bit but his thoughts are on you only. why did he say that? but why did you overreact? No, you didnt. You only care about him. He indeed acted like a child. He regretted to hurt your feelings. He knows that youre kind of sensitive..

meanwhile at home you just stared at the black screen of the TV trying to forget it by scrolling on your phone. You cried your best not to cry. Did you overreact? Do you treat him as a child? No, you only cared abiut hus safety, right?

a few hours later at around 11pm you eventually fell asleep on the couch. Hearing sounds from keys wake you up but you still pretend to be asleep. You noticed hes crouching to your height, just staring at you. He knows your not asleep but just let it be. He takes a blanket over you, letting you "sleep". You hear him whispering " I am so sorry baby i know you only care about me. It's true i acted like a child. I truly don't deserve you. I am sorry i understand that you wont forgive me easily. i love you" He hesitated not to kiss your forehead. You need space. it's true his words really hurt you...

(you can continue if you want) 🐼

i know its kinda cliche i tried not to make it that tgey are not that forgiving so easily. i am sorry its REALLY basic but pls remember my english isn't the best and i really have problems finding good words or in general express anything.. and i have NO creativity and neither do i write bcuz i just CANT im sorry adonis ily 🐼

No because Kevin is def the type to say all that as a joke and then it going too far because neither of you wanted to be called the one that takes shit too seriously. But also if i ever had a fight like that with kevin personally i would not stop crying because what the fuck 😟😟😟

[cosmicalily]

CAN YOU TELL I LIKE MF QUESTIONS

wait im gonna answer this bc im that fucking bored rn

1. we dont have chipotle in aus 😭

2. i don't mind if you're vegan, i think eating more plant based is better for the environment and for consumption, but personally, i don't think i could do it, i just try and limit my meat product consumption (like only having meat/fish once a week) and i think that's good enough, but i feel like other animal products like eggs and milk don't necessarily harm the animal as such? so i don't really try to avoid them.

3. i don't have a specific colour that gives me the ick, more it's combinations of colours in like patterns or layouts (graphic design student disgust moment) some colours are just not a vibe together and IM SO SORRY but rainbow tiedye is one pattern combo that makes me uncomfy

4. i would love to say fairies bc young me would be so happy but realistically probably more like something ocean wise? i mean there's so much there we haven't discovered so who knows

5. i don't discriminate, i love all potato forms but chips are probably my fav (i also love eating roast potatoes with kewpie mayo)

6. nope ill buy one and use it for a week then forget about it (mines been charging for about a year now)

7. seahorses, seals and penguins!

8. sometimes, depends on the mood. if i have lots of study and wanna be comfy, yes, or if I want to relax and chill out in pyjamas, yes, but normal days im too lazy and just throw a hoodie on

9. yep yep but it varies depending on what my skin needs, and often the season. my colder season routine is more about hydration bc my skin gets so dry and in warmer seasons its more about acne and sun protection

10. orange, even though it fucks with my adhd meds

11. im not sure if this is like an object or experience? but as for object i still have my bunny toy from when i was born, as well as all my childhood dance costumes (i keep my current ones too)

12. ooh so i have a few, for haircare, de lorenzo is the bomb, my hairdresser gives these to me and they have done AMAZING SHIT with restoring the moisture in my hair, and for skincare, some by mi is amazing for acne clearing

13. hide and cry

14. i drink water when im bored or anxious in class just to kill time so im most hydrated when im unfocused lmao

15. okay so i DONT KNOW like i feel like drowning would take the longest and my biggest fear is anything restricting like my breathing/being stuck underneath something so i would say drowning, then burning, bc it would be quick but horrible, then freezing

16. no

17. leg bouncy bounce all day everyday

18. okay so depending on mood again: if I'm feeling something summery, i do a mango milk/fruit tea (half sugar bc that shit is sweet) with mango and lychee popping pearls and extra ice, or a milk tea with cream cheese foam and tapioca pearls

19. avocado, it scares the shit out of me

20. oof i mean i remember vividly watching the princess and the frog a lot as a kid with my family so that's probably my fav

21. um i don't like decimals that much, they just make me uncomfortable bc it's like you're not a complete number??? what are you doing??

22. I USED TO AND HER NAME WAS GENENE, then my best friend left her on the bus and i was too anxious to walk down and check lost property 😭😭

23. i wear my earrings always, bc i have an irrational fear that they'll just grow in even though ive had them pierced for so long, sometimes bracelets, like delicate chain ones but also beaded ones i make myself

24. british english has the same spelling as australian english, so mainly that, but i do love poppin out with a random ass american accent for funsies

25. i know for a fact people dislike my taste in music and that's ok <3 kpop isn't for everyone and im aware but i love my music

26. oof on the white person scale im ridiculously high but on the asian person scale im embarrassingly low (this is how my japanese mother described it for me)

27. i love me my dungarees!! but also mini skirts and leg warmers are a winning combo

28. a whole ass japanese banquet

29. i like little ones with dents and holes that the sauce can get caught to, they have more flavour and they're like small and bite sized

30. oh

weirdly specific and unrelated asks to know someone well:

chipotle order?

thoughts on veganism?

a specific color that gives you the ick?

mythical creature you think/believe is real?

favorite form of potato?

do you use a watch?

what animal do you look forward to seeing when you visit an aquarium?

do you change into specific clothes for the house when you get home?

do you have a skincare routine (and how many steps is it)?

on a plane, do you ask for apple or orange juice?

anything from your childhood you’ve held on to?

brand of haircare/bodycare/skincare that you trust 100%?

first thing you’re doing in the purge?

do you think you’re dehydrated?

rank the methods of death: freezing, burning, drowning

thoughts on mint chocolate chip?

an anxious compulsion you do everyday?

your boba/tea order?

the veggie you dislike the most?

favorite disney princess movie?

a number that weirds you out?

do you have an emotional support water bottle?

do you wear jewelry?

which do you find yourself using, american or british english?

would you say you have good taste in music?

how’s your spice tolerance?

what’s your favorite or go-to outfit?

last meal on earth?

preferred pasta noodle?

ask me anything !

leave an ask for the person you reblog it from!

[hyunverse]

hello my sweet loveeee i hope ur day has been good :)) i just woke up and i’m about to go grocery shopping and i’m hoping they have my favorite pastry 🙏🏼 what’d you get up to today ? :)) anime names for cats are always so fitting yk ?? like it just works with cats so i completely respect that. i will be sure to give them kisses for u when i get home hehe. and yea dude the rats here are NASTY. people’s dogs can also do some reallyyyyyy questionable things 😭😭

YEP THE BACK LINE UR SO RIGHT i love that dorito shape on men 👌🏼. i feel like out of all the kpop idols in 4th gen, sunghoon, chan, hyunjin, and mingi have like the broadest shoulders i’ve seen so far like i literally think you could lay across them and just be fine (which like yes sign me up pls). YES VICTORRR so dead and sweet and gorg he is prime dead example 🙏🏼 i also wish i had long fingers. i’m always shocked at seeing the size diff of jeongins hand to his phone 😩 talk about sexy. god i just love hands i could talk about them for days it’s like embarrassing atp

sushi all day every day !! i will pick sushi over anything always 🤭 nachos are def up there too tho i love a nice loaded nacho. also thank you for your input thats so good to know. i will definitely be trying it out then :))) i love thai food so much as well so that’s good to know too ^_^ thank u love. SAME my heart beats so fast and i get the shakes 😭. it also oddly makes me break out rly bad ?? but it’s like painful acne too ?? idek. asian dolce latte sounds soooo good rn. i bet our starbucks menus are so different (tbh anything but americas seems better for all food chains). the christmas specials are always so good too, i love when they actually come up w new stuff here

SOOOOO SMOOCHABLE even for todays concert he just looked so so good. i was so mesmerized by felix and jeongin from the clips i’ve seen. something about the tight black jeans just does it for me every timeeeee 😩 MINHOS THIGHS don’t get me started again 🤭🤭. they all looked so good and i love the new dark blue outfits, it’s so sexy 😩

- 🐈‍⬛

sweet love is so cute i’m melting. hello angel baby <3 my day has been super good ^__^ i just watched an anime film called suzume, almost teared up im ngl ☹️ i have a tendeancy to cry during films 😔 it’s the sensitive heart in me 🤝 aaaa i lovelovelove grocery shopping sm <3 the cereal section makes me happy eventhough i don’t typically buy them </3 i hope they have your fav pastry, babe! whats ur fave? i love bagels, or any pastry that has meat in it, really. what do the dogs do there, help 😭 i think malaysian dogs are pretty normal 😟

DORITO SHAPE I CACKLEEEED. U DIDNT JUST CALL THEM DORITO SHAPED 😭 chan’s back mmmm. esp that one performance, i think wolfgang where he took off his shirt ISBDKWJS MAKES ME FERAL ‼️ also maybe its just me but sharp collarbones... delish.

victor is the man them e-boys wish they were but arent. they could never be victor. he is far too beautiful. unreachable visual 💯 talking abt animated characters... how are we feeling about howl pendragon? so sexy 😋 JEONGIN’S HANDS ARE SO BIG LIKEEEE?? /:+"!+ THE SIGHT OF THEM MAKES ME MALFUNCTION?? SIR PUT THAT HAND IN MINE RN ‼️ HIS PHONE BE LOOKING LIKE AN ERASER IN HIS HAND BCS HOW BIG HIS HAND IS. HRJFHEHF R GRTRR

coffee is so good it’s unfair that its bad for us 😭 why r bad things always so good. smh. i think our starbies menus are deffo different, actually, a lot of our fast food menus are different me thinks. esp with the fact that malaysia is a dominantly muslim country, so a lot of chain restaurants have to be halal (muslim friendly) — therefore they don’t serve food that contain pork or alcohol. i think that's the main reason why malaysian menus are super different compared to america’s!! i know there are certain recipes available there which aren’t here </3 also!! ik most americans typically customize their starbucks — compared to that, malaysians usually opt for whatever that’s on the menu. i rarely customize my order tbh ^__^ and whats up with American mcdonalds constantly having a broken ice cream machine? istg i go for a mcdonald's ice cream run every week and its never broken 😭 oh and u mentioning thai food is making me crave for pandan leaves chicken </3

concert vids are always so good. THE HYUNE DANCING VIDS CONTAMINATING MY TIKTOK FYP RN IS CRAZY. CRAZY I TELL U!! someone said that hyunjin flirts through his dancing and oh god. . . it’s so true. now i can’t get the thought outta my head. FELIX BEEN ACTING UP A LIL TOO MUCH LATELY BABE... WHATS UP WITH THE CONSTANT SHIRT LIFTING 🤨 HES IN HIS S WORD ERA ISTG ‼️dark looks fit them sm 😋 they look so 😋 nomnom able 😋 minho’s thighs in them leather jeans doe. . . think abt it...

it’s like 4am rn i shud sleep. have a good day my baby, kisskisskiss <3

[lonesomedotmp3]

denmark's wife was the true treasure... ok obx writers u win this one

[bradshawsweetheart]

Here is another play by play, it’s mostly me yelling. Apologies in advance🤭

“Dolly can’t get her sentences straight,” Bradley says softly, laughing. He nods at you. “Try again.” 

“Dolly” replacing “birdie” is an incredible incredible touch.

As if he knows what you’re thinking, he turns so you can see the top of his hip. He pulls his shirt up and yes--there it is. A red, oozing buckshot wound. Severe from the close-range shot of your shotgun.

Yes maaaaaaam, the arm was not the target!!

“Dolly, Bradley’s long gone now. Been fading ever since I got that specks-wearing fella. Shit, I’ll tell you, though--that boy is a fighter. Kept making it back in.”

God, this made me so sad. Like I knew this to be true already but Jesus

“There she goes. She gets it now. Good girl,” Bradley coos, his voice low and velvety. “Didn’t you feel it? Didn’t you feel it when he was gone?”

THIS just made me even sadder. She didn’t even notice, not with everything going on. How heartbreaking. Fuck.

“See, now, Bradley did take care of that part all by himself,” he says, eyebrows raised. “I didn’t have to do much convincing. He was really far gone for you, dolly. Did you know that? I’d bet you’re the reason he kept fighting it--poor fool. Didn’t even know what he was fighting.” 

Knowing now that he started fading when he axed Bob, which was after the sex, one of Bradley’s last memories as himself was sleeping with Gale. I’m so distraught rn

“I didn’t know why I liked it--I just knew that I got a good and funny feeling whenever I could hear my baby sister crying in her crib. I used to pinch her in the night--just to make her wail. And then I’d listen and listen until her voice got hoarse. When she thought I was gone, or when she was all cried out--I’d jump out at her. Get right up in her face and scream.”

This is so fucked up, excellent work Millie LMAO

“People like Bradley are always a little sad and a little scared.”

I seriously did have to put my phone down and cry at this line.

“And you’re something special. Well--you were before you went all the way with Bradley. That’s why this is so perfect--the guy you didn’t pick is holding you down.”

Holy shit.

Bradley’s lip twitches--his smile doesn’t falter. 

EW LMFAO

“Might have to work hard to get Coyote, though. He seemed pretty determined to keep those kids safe, didn’t he? I wonder if he’ll fight as hard as Fanboy did.” 

WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK WHAT THE FUCK

Before he leaves, he walks into the kitchen. Something changes--the music stops. He’s started the tape over. Running Up That Hill begins again. 

Alright Gale it’s time to become Max Mayfield up in this bitch

“Is he gone?” 

I JUST YELLED

He’s looking right at you, the one who’s trying to save him, and you suddenly understand that he doesn’t want to be saved by you. 

JAKE PLEASE BE NORMAL FOR FIVE MINUTES

“I love you, baby,” Jake mutters. A few tears stream down his face. “I’d die if I…if I didn’t tell you that before I…before I…”

STOP IT RIGHT NOW

Just as Coyote is about to open the bus doors, just as he is about to let Bradley on and grieve and sob and ask for the full story and just as Phoenix is about to spring to the mess hall to find you, everyone hears a gun cock in utter and complete unison.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

And from where she’s standing, she can only see a quarter of his face. But she sees it exactly when you do: a wink. Barely there, hardly evident, but real. 

IM LITERALLY YELLING

“I’m just trying to help you,” he sobs, smile growing wider and wider.

IM GOING TO FUCKING THROW UP LMFAOOOOOO

His stomach is turning itself inside out as all the children group at the back of the bus and watch you point a gun at Mister Rooster. 

Fuck dude oh my god. This is heartbreaking.

“You can’t,” he whispers to you. He’s standing with his chest--Bradley’s chest--pressed against the barrels of your shotgun. He grins at you. “You won’t.”

BRADLEYS CHEST. IM GOING TO CRY AND THROW UP

You’re choking on air, staring evil right in the face, and you cannot pull the trigger because it is wearing the skin of the man you adore so. 

I’m sending you my therapy bill Millothy I am so fucking serious

And the horror extends to the entire bus, making all the kids clutch the seats and each other, when Bradley suddenly swings the ax. 

BIGCH WHAT FJEKCOP

And his is the last face you’ll ever see. And even though he’s taking your life--you can feel it draining from your stunted lungs and your purple lips--you’re glad that it’s a familiar one. In a strange, strange way, you wish that he would hold your hand through it. 

I had to put my phone down to cry again. Literally what the fuck. How do I feel such anger and such heartbreak mourning Gale and a man who is no longer there

Eyes lulling to the side, muscles going numb beneath your hot skin, you see something in the haze--something bizarre. It’s Bob. He’s lying on the dirt floor beside you, watching you. His face is pink and pale and he’s wearing his glasses that are no longer broken. He doesn’t say anything at all. He just lies beside you, looks into your eyes, and moves to lay his hand on your shoulder.

Millie please stop hurting me this way

“Close your eyes and let it happen! Don’t you want to see your boys again? Bradley and Bob? Mickey and Reuben?” 

“Bradley” being included in the list of the dead who have been brutalized with his ax is giving me an out of body experience listening to this song rn

“We were all counting on you. Your name--it’s actually the last thing that Fanboy said before he bit it. Well, before I took off the top of his head. He must’ve been panicking--scrambling, I guess. Couldn’t think of any other name but yours, dolly.”

WHAT FHE FUCK

“I know,” he whispers. “Don’t you miss him? You didn’t even know when he left, dolly.”

STOP IT RIGHT THe FUCK NOW

“Is he…” you whisper, sniffing hard as tears prickle your eyes. “Is he sleeping?” 

He knows you mean Bradley--the real, actual Bradley.

“Your side is so cold,” he whispers. “Come to bed.”

SHHT THE FUCK HP SHUT YWHWN LFLFP I AM SOBBIMG THIS OART GOT ME THE MOST SO FAR

Before you can stop it, his hand is on your hip. You know it isn’t Bradley--but it looks like him. It feels like him. You don’t push his hand away. 

This is so fucked up fuck fuck fuck fuck

“Fuck you,” you spit. “You’re not Bradley.” 

YOURE GODDAMN RIGHT THAT ISNT BRADLEY

𝐂𝐑𝐔𝐄𝐋 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐄𝐑 — 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐕𝐄

—𝐃𝐄𝐒𝐂𝐑𝐈𝐏𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍: 𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐒 𝐎𝐅 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐘𝐎𝐔. —𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐒: 𝟔.𝟖𝐊 —𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 —𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 —𝐕𝐈𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐁𝐎𝐀𝐑𝐃 —𝐏𝐑𝐄𝐕𝐈𝐎𝐔𝐒 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑

𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐕𝐄 𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐓 𝐎𝐀𝐊𝐒, 𝐌𝐄 𝐂𝐀𝐌𝐏 𝐀𝐑𝐂𝐀𝐃𝐈𝐀 𝐉𝐔𝐋𝐘 𝟐𝟐𝐍𝐃, 𝟏𝟗𝟖𝟕

“Don’t wig out yet, baby. Let’s chat before I book it to the bus barn, huh? I can spare a few minutes for my best girl,” Bradley sighs, crouching down and squatting beside you. He knows you won’t be able to move Jake off of you by yourself now that he’s dead weight--you’re stuck. “Don’t think you’re gonna get anywhere anytime soon.”

Sweet Hell, it feels good to let the mask slip, Bradley thinks. To be honest. To openly enjoy the petrification instead of pretending that he cares about you and your feelings. There’s no hiding this divine pleasure in watching you squirm, in watching your helpless figure and your stricken expression.  

You’re staring at him, more stunned and more horrified with every aching second that passes the two of you by, with blood matted on your eyelashes as Jake bleeds out over your body. And as soon as he says it, you realize it. It washes over you like the angry waves of the lake: yes, you’re stuck. Jake is on top of you, consciousness fading, mouth wide open with shock and agony still. His blood is pooling all over you, leaking into your hair and into your mouth. 

That’s when the hysteria begins. It is sitting on the edge of your body, watching you as if it is a snake waiting to strike. And then it bubbles over--then you begin to wriggle from beneath Jake, fighting to get out from underneath him. But Jake moans--a distant, crumpled thing that is enough to tell you that he is hurting, you’re hurting him. You cease all movements, swallowing hard--all that bloody saliva slink down your throat and pool in your belly in a puddle of ice water. 

Okay. I can’t move. You think hard. But he’s alive. For now, he’s alive.

“Bradley,” you whisper, voice quivering. “Please…please…it’s me. It’s--it’s me--Gale. Nightingale. It’s me, Bradley, it’s me! I’m not gonna--what are you? Don’t do this--!”

“Dolly can’t get her sentences straight,” Bradley says softly, laughing. He nods at you. “Try again.” 

Sobbing, you shake your head. 

“Why are you…why are you doing this, Bradley? I thought--!”

“--You really don’t understand?” Bradley asks. He smiles softly, petting your hair again. You’re too stunned to bat him away, to thrash your head in the opposite direction. “Good golly miss dolly, I gotta bash your ears now, huh?”

When you don’t answer, Bradley sits down on the ground, the ax just beside him. He keeps his palm on your face, smiling softly as he smooths the blood away from your chin and cheeks and into your hair. And there you are, your heart beating out of your chest and your mind fuzzier than the television at your grandmother’s house, staring up at him with big and sad eyes. 

Craning your neck, you turn--the shotgun is up against the wall. You wouldn’t be able to reach it in time even if Jake wasn’t holding you down. And even if you could throw Jake off, the ax is just by Bradley. You couldn’t outrun him--not in your prime state, which you most certainly are not in now.  

Prickles tickle the column of your spine when you look back at Bradley.

“I shot you,” you whisper to him. “I--I got you. Right outside the doors. I know I did--I heard you.”  

Glancing at his arm, you double-check--yes, the sediment and gravel is still there. That wasn’t where you shot him. It couldn’t be. It would be red and oozing and more severe--especially at such a close range. 

As if he knows what you’re thinking, he turns so you can see the top of his hip. He pulls his shirt up and yes--there it is. A red, oozing buckshot wound. Severe from the close-range shot of your shotgun.

“Thought it’d be a nifty idea--the whole tripping over Coyote story,” Bradley says. “‘Cause you did get me--but you’re just not as good of a shot as you think you are, dolly. Had to rough myself up in case I started bleeding through my shirt. Really play the part, right?” 

And you don’t respond, fat tears streaming down your face. Bradley tuts, thumbing a few of them away. Without another word, he brings his thumbs to his lips and slowly pushes it down onto his tongue. Terror holds your lungs hostage as he suckles your tears.

As the salt melts on Bradley’s tongue, he grins. He can practically taste your fear--it’s as fulfilling to him as nectar is to you. But he’s always preferred salt over sugar.  

“What’s happening?” You ask, choking on your sobs. “What happened to you, Bradley?” 

“Dolly, Bradley’s long gone now. Been fading ever since I got that specks-wearing fella. Shit, I’ll tell you, though--that boy is a fighter. Kept making it back in.” Brows furrowed, you say nothing. You don’t know what the fuck is going on. “And here I thought you were supposed to be the smart one,” Bradley taunts, pinching your nose. “Dolly, I’m not him. Well--I mean, I’m him,” Bradley says, gesturing to his body. Then he points to his temple. “But I’m not him.”

Vision blurring with pink-tinted tears, you sob again. 

“What are you talking about?” You ask, weeping openly. “You must be out of your fucking mind!” 

“I guess you could say Bradley is out of his mind,” he says, grinning. “Best to believe me, dolly.”

But you know. You know that this isn’t Bradley. It’s suddenly as clear as a glass windowpane on a cool, spring morning after the rain has passed. The man crouched beside you is Bradley by appearance, yes, with his broad shoulders and powerful legs and short shorts, but he’s not really here. No. Because he would never hurt you. How could he? He’s the boy who would ask you to dip your finger in his coffee to sweeten it. It would be blasphemous if you even thought for one moment that he would harm you. 

The realization washes over your face, contorts your expression.  

“There she goes. She gets it now. Good girl,” Bradley coos, his voice low and velvety. “Didn’t you feel it? Didn’t you feel it when he was gone?”

Sobbing, you shake your head. 

“Who are you?” You ask, trembling.

Jake is growing heavier on your body--it’s difficult to breathe now. 

“You know who I am,” he says, nodding gently. “You read all about me in the papers, didn’t you? The maniac. That’s what they called me--right? The guy who killed all the camp counselors and the camp nurse at Camp Arcadia. Some no good devil-worshiper.” 

Mind spinning, lungs aching, you shake your head. 

“But you’re dead,” you whisper. “They found your…they found your body there with the others. Thirty years ago.” 

He takes a long, hard look at you. It is not one particularly seeped in malice, not one that sends a chill down your tailbone. It’s a long, hard look at your face as if he’s playing the part of upset father and you’re the unruly daughter who came in past her curfew.

“I know you felt me,” he whispers to you. “I came to you in the night.” 

Eyebrows furrowed, you’re just about to refute this claim, just about to scream out for help! when the truth tickles your cheeks as it lands just before your eyes. 

Oh. The nightmares. Every night that you were not in bed with Bradley, every time you finally fell asleep, he was there waiting. He stalked you. He found you. He terrified you. 

“Your fear was so sweet,” Bradley coos. “Tangled up in your sheets, frozen, sweating bullets. You let me get so close to you. I would’ve devoured you if I’d had the time.”

“Fuck you,” you whisper meekly.

A tired sobs rips out of your lungs. 

“See, now, Bradley did take care of that part all by himself,” he says, eyebrows raised. “I didn’t have to do much convincing. He was really far gone for you, dolly. Did you know that? I’d bet you’re the reason he kept fighting it--poor fool. Didn’t even know what he was fighting.” 

Bile climbs your throat. 

“You’re a fucking monster!”

He grins. 

“I’m not,” he says. “I’m just a man who made a deal with the Devil.”

You shake your head at him, shivering, trembling. 

“There’s no such thing,” you spit. “You’re trying to scare me.” 

“All those bad things that happen in the world, happening here, and you don’t believe there’s something behind it?” He asks, brows perched. He runs a hand through his hair and sighs. “Last time I came around, nurse’s were still religious. None of this agnostic nonsense.” 

“There’s no Devil,” you whisper--thought you feel like you’re losing your conviction as the energy drains from your body. “You’re a--a conman.” 

He sighs. 

“How do you think I came back?” He whispers. “At random? God’s will?” 

You don’t know. You don’t know. All you know is that the person before you is not Bradley.

“You’re lying,” you whisper. 

“Let’s not yank each other’s chain. Total honesty, alright? Scout’s honor,” Bradley says, crossing his heart. “It was destiny. The storm. The tree. Our pal Jake here finding the axes--finding my ax.” Bradley thumps Jake on the back--he doesn’t moan. He doesn’t make any sound at all--and he doesn’t move. “Bradley cutting his hand--giving me his blood. And, God, so much of it.”

Bradley’s a bleeder. Oh, God. You remember it so vividly--the blood as it dripped down his arm, his sheepish smile, his quiet apologies. 

“You…” You cough--blood spurts out of your mouth and sprays Bradley’s knee. You know, with your entire chest and everything inside of it, that it is not your blood. “Why Bradley?” 

He stares down at you--all the flecks of gold in his sweet, big eyes are gone. And behind those eyes, just behind the crystal film, is nothing. Void of life. Void of kindness. Void of warmth. They’re just two black holes in his face, rimmed with pretty lashes. 

“You know, I always like it when people were sad. Scared. The best was when people were sad and scared, you know? I didn’t know why I liked it--I just knew that I got a good and funny feeling whenever I could hear my baby sister crying in her crib. I used to pinch her in the night--just to make her wail. And then I’d listen and listen until her voice got hoarse. When she thought I was gone, or when she was all cried out--I’d jump out at her. Get right up in her face and scream.” He sighs. You’re shivering as he speaks, throat dry. He’s smiling fondly in remembrance, left eye twitching softly. “People like Bradley are always a little sad and a little scared.”

“People like him?” You whisper. 

He nods. 

“Orphans. Lovesick orphans,” he whispers. “He kept me full.”  

Closing your eyes, you struggle to move. But you can’t--you’re perfectly, completely pinned down to the floor. 

“What about me?” You whisper brokenly. Defeat begins its descent in your body--numbing your fingers and toes, lulling your head to the side, pressing against your eyelids. “Why didn’t you choose me?” 

Now he furrows his brows. 

“Well, you were hardly ever scared,” he says. “At least when you were awake you weren’t. I couldn’t get you to draw any blood when you were asleep. Hell, I couldn’t ever get you to hold the ax either.”

Sighing, almost completely still, you just stare at him. He stares at you, too. 

“I’m scared all the time,” you whisper helplessly. 

He shakes his head. 

“You’re not,” he answers. “Or else I’d be inside of you.”

Recoiling, you shake your head. 

“You’re sick,” you whisper.

“I mean, there were even some hard times, right? Had to slice that Mable girl when I was heading for Jake. Tear her bible up good so she would stop sniffing around. What good is a church girl without her scripture?”

Chills cover your arms and legs--finally overpowering the warm blood on your body as it dries on your skin. 

“But why Jake?” You whisper brokenly. “Why him?” 

“Because he’s the best shot. Because he was in the way of you,” Bradley answers, brows furrowed. “And you’re something special. Well--you were before you went all the way with Bradley. That’s why this is so perfect--the guy you didn’t pick is holding you down.”

You cough--your lungs are deflating. 

“Why was I special?” It’s all you can manage to choke out. 

“Virgin blood is strong--pure. Untainted. That’s what…that’s what happened last time, you see. Nurse Abbott was waiting until marriage. I picked ‘em off one-by-one until she was alone…” Bradley says, staring at your face, watching his own reflection in your tearful eyes. He sighs. “And then--!” 

“--She killed you. She was the one who did it, wasn’t she?” You whisper, sneering. Your lip trembles. “She killed you.”

Bradley’s lip twitches--his smile doesn’t falter. 

“No bullshitting, right? Yes. She…she did,” he answers. “I killed her, too, though. That’s an important part to the story, dolly. And I’ve really been feeling like the universe wanted me to come back and finish what I started. So…that’s what I’m gonna do.” 

He picks up the ax, holds it so it reflects off the sunlight. And then he grins at you. 

“No,” you whimper weakly. You’re trembling all over, lungs empty, ribs crushed, head aching, throat choked. But something sinks in your gut when he stands, holding the ax against himself. “Please…please--!” 

“I love it when you beg for it,” he whispers to you. You stop speaking, just staring up at him, dazed with grief as the reality of right now blankets you. You’re going to die. He seems to see it in your face, smell it in the air. He smiles again. “I’m gonna go back to the bus now. Phoenix will let me in--I’ll get her first. She’ll go fast, I bet. Give in quick. Might have to work hard to get Coyote, though. He seemed pretty determined to keep those kids safe, didn’t he? I wonder if he’ll fight as hard as Fanboy did.” 

“He’ll kill you,” you whisper, sobbing. “He’ll kill you!” 

“He wouldn’t kill Bradley,” he says, cocking his head to the side. “Neither would you.” 

Saying nothing, you just stare up at him. 

“And when I’ve finished the kiddos off, I’ll come back for you,” he says, pointing the ax at you. It nearly touches your nose. “Saving the best for last.”

Before he leaves, he walks into the kitchen. Something changes--the music stops. He’s started the tape over. Running Up That Hill begins again. 

When he reappears, he grins at you. 

“See you in a jiff,” he promises. 

With that, he’s off. Stepping over Jake’s body and yours, he galivants across the blood-soaked wooden floor and heads for the doors. And then he’s gone--a gust of hot, summer air caressing your face. 

Now all you can hear is the sound of your own sobs--they echo in the mess hall, vibrate across the picnic tables, and land uneasily on Jake’s back. 

Alone. You’re alone now. All your friends are dead--or they’re going to be dead soon. 

Everything in your body--every ache, every muscle, every bone, every nerve--is telling you to close your eyes. Give in. Let go. Wait for it to come. Breathe until you cannot anymore. Think about what flowers you will want at your funeral and hope your father remembers that you hate carnations. 

“Is he gone?” 

Jolting, you look at Jake--your vision is tinted pink from the blood in your eyes, from the tears. And the heaviness of his body suddenly becomes a bit lighter--lighter like he is lifting himself just barely. 

“Jake?” You whisper. 

There’s not response for a minute. And for a fleeting few moments, as you gaze down at his eyes that are still closed and his lips that are still shut, you think you’re losing your mind. Making this up. Imagining him here so you won’t have to die all by yourself. 

But then his lashes flutter--a tiny groan falls out of his mouth. 

“He’s…he’s gone, right?” 

And then, without warning, Jake suddenly rolls off your body. It is a quick movement--like he’s using the last of his strength, like he’s doing this final thing for you. 

The pain that shoots through his body when he lands on his back is excruciating. It is so excruciating, so blinding, that he almost can’t stop himself from screaming. But he does--he does for you. He breathes through his nose roughly, sobbing softly. 

“Jake…” you whisper, suddenly able to move. You scramble to sit up, covered in gore still, leaning over him. “Jake, I--Jake, I thought you were dead.” 

And before you can even get over the sudden shock of Jake being alive, of Jake moving off your body, your hands are moving before you give them explicit permission to. You’re pulling on his shoulders, trying to get him to move onto his belly again so you can staunch his wound, but he cries out. 

“Stop, Gale!” He begs, tears streaming down his face. 

“I’m trying to help--!” 

Suddenly, his eyes are open and pouring into yours. And God, there are those green eyes. Greener than grass. Greener than keylimes. Greener than moss. Greener than the earth. He’s looking right at you, the one who’s trying to save him, and you suddenly understand that he doesn’t want to be saved by you. 

“Let me help…help you for once,” Jake whispers. “You go.” 

Two stray tears stream down his face. 

He’s thinking about everything that Bradley said, how he taunted you, how still he had to be so Bradley didn’t really finish him off. He’s thinking about that bus full of kids, thinking about Payback, Fanboy, Bob, Paul. He’s thinking about it all and how you’re going to have to do this by yourself. And he’s going to stay here. He has to stay here--he can’t run, he can’t hide, he can’t walk. He can’t even feel his toes. He has to stay here. 

“Jake,” you mutter, beginning to weep. “I can’t--I can’t leave you here.”

It’s an impossible decision--one that is tearing your heart to bits as you hover over him. 

He’s trembling--it feels like you’re rubbing noses with death again as saliva gathers underneath your tongue. 

“Please,” he whispers. “Please…go. There’s no time, baby, there’s no…”

“Jake,” you weep. “I didn’t listen to you! It’s him--it’s…it’s…”

You won’t know who to say it is. It’s Bradley, but it’s not. But you can’t get yourself to say that it is Damien Gwyar--the original maniac, the one who slayed everyone all those years ago. 

“I love you, baby,” Jake mutters. A few tears stream down his face. “I’d die if I…if I didn’t tell you that before I…before I…”

Die, Jake thinks. Before I die.  

“I love you,” you sob. And you mean it--you really, truly do. Even if it is muddled, if it’s complicated, if it’s wrong, if it’s right, if you’re exhausted, if it’s true--you mean it. “I love you, Jake. You idiot.”

And you can’t say anything else, just collapsing against his chest to sob again. And against his blood-soaked shirt, on this blood-soaked floor, you let all the tears and snot run and run until you feel like you’re entirely empty. 

With the final bit of his strength, he reaches up--ignoring the searing burning--and holds both of your cheeks. And your cheeks, so wet and sticky and familiar, nearly make his throat close. He wishes he had held you more. He hopes he gets to hold you again. 

“Knew it,” he whispers, a sad smile tugging on his lips.

“I’m sorry,” you weep. “Jake, I’m so sorry--I didn’t know what-what to do. I didn’t know what to do and-and--!” 

“--It’s okay,” he whispers. His bottom lip wobbles. “Get your gun, Nightingale.” 

Like his word is Lord, you do get the gun. Your legs are wobbling and you can hardly walk, can hardly wrap your fingers around it, but you do. And then you return to his crumpled form, sinking to your knees and looking down at him. 

“I don’t wanna leave you,” you repeat brokenly. “Jake, I’m so sorry. I’m so…I’m so, so sorry. I should’ve been better. I should’ve--I could’ve--!”

But even when you say it--knowing it’s the truth--you also know that Bradley must be getting close to the bus barn. He might even be opening the doors now. He might even be halfway through Phoenix, her screams loud and the blood--

“Shhh,” he whispers. “No time.” 

“I can save you,” you whisper. “God, please let me save you! Let me have this!”

You’re begging. 

Jake shakes his head.

“Go,” Jake whispers back. He strokes your hair very softly, tries to remember the way it feels in his hands. And then he pushes you softly.

Hastily, and with great anguish, you kiss his lips. All you can taste is blood, but you keep kissing him. You kiss and cry and he kisses back as his blood pools around him on the floor. He’s dizzy and you’re exhausted to the point of near-delusion. 

Then you stand up. 

“I’m coming back for you,” you promise him. 

You really mean it, too. Whether he is alive or dead, whether you’ll bandage him or cover him with a sheet, you’re coming back for him. You will not leave Jake alone here. Not in your lifetime. 

“I’ll be here,” he whispers brokenly. He’s staring up at you, quivering. “You’ve gotta…you’ve gotta fight.” 

“People keep telling me that,” you whisper. 

His jaw is locked in place when he speaks again. You hope, with everything in your heart, that this is not the last time you’ll ever see him looking at you the way he is now. 

“You give ‘im Hell.”

You give ‘im Hell. 

You’re still sobbing when you walk outside again. The heat is abrasive, the sun is beating down, you’re sticky with blood, but your legs are working and you’re moving towards the bus barn. Right now, in this precise moment when your heart is pounding out of your chest, it’s all you can focus on. You have to get from here to here. 

And there he is--Bradley. He’s standing just outside the bus, the bus barn door wide open and letting the sunlight pour in. But the bus doors are still closed.  

You don’t understand why this is happening, but it is. It really, truly is. It’s here, right before your eyes. Gone is the man that you love, the one who came inside of you only a few days ago. And standing in his place is whatever the fuck is beckoning everyone off the bus. 

“I had to…I had to hurt him,” Bradley sobs. He’s good at this--there’s real tears streaming down his face, snot dripping out from his nose and onto his mustache. He’s holding his palm against the bus, still gripping the ax. “God, I think I…I think I killed him! But he was coming for Gale…”

“What happened to Gale?” Coyote asks, reaching for the handle to open the bus doors. He’s panting already, panicked. Bradley has a lot of blood on him--splattered all over his face and clothes. And when he ripped the bus barn door open, he was sobbing. “Shit, is she…oh my, God…” 

Everyone on the bus is looking at Bradley: a man who has seemingly lost everything in the span of only a little while. The tape to lure Jake into the mess hall has restarted, blood has been spilled, and Bradley is sobbing outside the bus from the loss of you. 

“He got her,” Bradley sobs. “He…He got Gale. I wasn’t quick enough. He just--he threw her on the ground, cracked her head open. Oh, God…the crack. It was--it was--!” 

Bradley cuts himself off with his own choked sobs.

Phoenix’s fingernails dig into the bus seat. She can hardly hear Bradley, can hardly hear anything, feel anything. But she hears him say it. You’re gone, she thinks. You’re dead now, too.  

Just as Coyote is about to open the bus doors, just as he is about to let Bradley on and grieve and sob and ask for the full story and just as Phoenix is about to spring to the mess hall to find you, everyone hears a gun cock in utter and complete unison.

And suddenly, you’re here. You’re standing in the doorway, drenched in blood, hair matted against your head. You’re holding the shotgun, legs wobbling but feet planted firmly, and aiming it directly at Bradley. You’re alive--most gloriously alive. 

“Don’t open those doors!” You announce. Your voice echoes. “Get the fuck away from the bus!” 

“Gale…” Bradley says, feigning shock. His heart is pounding, but he decides to keep it going. Don’t let the curtains close. He turns towards you, stumbles a few steps--he’s still holding the ax. “Gale, I--I thought you were dead! I thought--I thought Jake killed you!” 

“Don’t listen to him,” you scream. “You…you fuck!”

Coyote and Phoenix watch in horror, their eyebrows furrowed. 

“What the fuck is going on?” Coyote asks.  

Phoenix is staring at Bradley as he stumbles towards you. He’s gripping the ax with such conviction, tears still streaming down his face. And from where she’s standing, she can only see a quarter of his face. But she sees it exactly when you do: a wink. Barely there, hardly evident, but real. 

And it suddenly clicks--washes over her like a wave of warm, salty water. 

“Bradley is the killer,” she whispers. She grips Coyote’s arm, quivering. “Bradley is the…oh my, God.” 

“I thought you were gone,” Bradley weeps. And with his back turned to the bus, he grins at you--entirely sure no one will see him. “I’m so--I’m so sorry I left you.” 

“Don’t come any closer!” You scream. Your hands are shaking. 

“I’m just trying to help you,” he sobs, smile growing wider and wider. “C’mere, doll, I’m so sorry I left you with that--with that monster!” 

He grows nearer and nearer with every step. 

From your peripherals, you see movement on the bus--Coyote reaching for the handle to open the bus doors. 

“Don’t open the fucking doors!” You demand, voice echoing in the barn. “Just--no matter what, don’t do it! Okay?” 

Coyote freezes. His stomach is turning itself inside out as all the children group at the back of the bus and watch you point a gun at Mister Rooster. 

“I’m not gonna hurt you,” Bradley whispers to you. “I’m saving you for last.” 

“I will fucking kill you!” You scream--voice hoarse. Tears are pouring down your cheeks. “I’ll kill you if you step closer to me! I’ve shot you before and I’ll sure as Hell do it again!” 

He’s only a few feet in front of you now. 

“You can’t,” he whispers to you. He’s standing with his chest--Bradley’s chest--pressed against the barrels of your shotgun. He grins at you. “You won’t.”

Arms nearly going limp, you open your mouth to retaliate--but nothing comes. Nothing at all. You’re choking on air, staring evil right in the face, and you cannot pull the trigger because it is wearing the skin of the man you adore so. 

He knows it already. 

Coyote and Phoenix watch in horror as your finger slips from the trigger. And the horror extends to the entire bus, making all the kids clutch the seats and each other, when Bradley suddenly swings the ax. 

It comes so quickly that you hardly have time to duck--the blade catches the top of your shoulder, slicing your skin open. Hot blood oozes from the wound as you fall to your hands and knees, scrambling for the gun you dropped. 

Bradley’s quicker than you--kicking it aside again before he grabs hold of your hair. He wraps it tightly in his fist and pulls up until you’re screaming in pain, almost delirious with it as you swing your arms to hit him. 

“She needs help,” Phoenix says, panting. “Oh my--fuck, she needs help!” 

“She doesn’t want us to open the doors!” Coyote says, eyes wide as he watches Bradley drag you forward as you swing your arms fruitlessly. “What should we--fuck, what should we do?” 

“You really couldn’t have just stayed put, huh?” Bradley sneers, throwing you against the dirt floor. You don’t have much fight left in you--he can tell. He straddles you, pins your arms against the ground. Even your squirming does nothing. “I wanted to save you for the end, dolly.”

And you’re panicking now, screaming and fighting to get out from under him. Your heart is in your throat and your stomach is falling and you keep bucking your hips up to no avail. Again--you’re stuck. Pinned. 

But this time--this time something is different. This isn’t Jake and he isn’t hurt. This is Damien and he’s setting the ax down. He’s wrapping his hands around the column of your throat as you thrash viciously, kicking your heels into the dirt. And then, with the hands that caressed you so lovingly only a little while ago, he’s choking you. 

“It’ll do,” he grunts, pushing down on the soft middle of your throat. His fingers are hot as the blood caking your skin begins to crumble off beneath his grip. “You got bloody enough.” 

You’ve never been choked before--not in any capacity. You work with a few girls with stories about it; strange older cousins they were left alone with, angry older brothers who used to babysit them, violent ex-husbands who didn’t like them to talk back, strangers in the night hiding in bushes, lovers in the bedroom who kissed it better. Before this very moment, you’ve never known what it means to not be able to breathe. 

Grabbing fistfulls of dirt as Bradley’s knees dig into your arms, your vision is already beginning to blacken. And every time you buck your hips, Bradley weighs down on you harder.

“I wanna watch all that light blink off,” Bradley mutters, teeth grit. He’s still smiling softly, pushing down harder and harder. “Dirty, dirty girl.”

It is precisely when he says this that you realize that this is it. You are going to die. He is not going to let up and you told everyone to stay on the bus. And his is the last face you’ll ever see. And even though he’s taking your life--you can feel it draining from your stunted lungs and your purple lips--you’re glad that it’s a familiar one. In a strange, strange way, you wish that he would hold your hand through it. 

“Do something!” Phoenix sobs. 

Coyote hustles to the front of the bus, searching desperately for a clue of what to do. He doesn’t know what he’s doing, doesn’t know what he can do. 

“I don’t know what to do!”  

Eyes lulling to the side, muscles going numb beneath your hot skin, you see something in the haze--something bizarre. It’s Bob. He’s lying on the dirt floor beside you, watching you. His face is pink and pale and he’s wearing his glasses that are no longer broken. He doesn’t say anything at all. He just lies beside you, looks into your eyes, and moves to lay his hand on your shoulder. His hand is warm.

Entire body growing warm, heart sinking in your gut, you know that this must be dying. 

Yes, this is it. My brain is being deprived of oxygen. I’m hallucinating. There are no ghosts here. Bob is gone and it will stay that way. 

And then, sudden as a firework popping in the near distance, there’s a loud noise. It’s loud enough to make Bradley jump, falter--his grip slips down your throat. You can breathe, only for a moment, as Coyote lays on the horn of the bus. 

All the blood comes rushing back to your limbs, all that warmth and numbness begins to fade. You know you only have one moment--just one moment to get away and you have to use it. 

Because you’re covered in slick blood, because Bradley got spooked, because Coyote laid on the horn, you’re able to slip your right hand out from underneath Bradley. And in one swift and precise movement, you jam your thumb into his eye. It isn’t enough to cause permanent damage--but it is enough to make him jerk off and away from you. 

“Go! Go, Gale!” Phoenix screams, pounding on the windows. “Run!”

Scrambling, taking deep breaths and coughing, you get to your feet in an instant. And before you can even think about it, you’re grabbing the ax. And then you’re grabbing the shotgun while Bradley writhes, holding both hands over his eye as blood drips down his cheek. 

“You stupid bitch!” He wails. “You fucking cunt! My fucking eye!” 

You’re running as fast as your legs can carry you--outside, into the heat, away from camp, and through the oak trees. You’re running as far as you can, you decide, even if your lungs are screaming and you’re still sputtering. 

But Jesus Christ--you’re alive. The sun is on your face and your hair is billowing in the wind and the frogs are crying on the water and you’re alive. You didn’t die. He didn’t do it. Bob is gone. 

Bradley, still holding his injured eye, stumbles to his feet. And in his haze, blood wetting his hand, he looks around for you. You’re gone--so is his ax and so is your gun. 

“Fucking bitch! I’m gonna fucking get you!” 

He glances at the bus--Coyote is standing in the windshield with his arms crossed over his broad chest. And before Bradley can do anything, Coyote holds up the kitchen knife in his hand--it gleams in the sunlight. 

“You’re all gonna fucking die tonight!” Bradley screams. 

You’re running for a long time--at least that’s what it feels like. Your arms are heavy and you’re losing blood and you can hardly see because of the bright sun. Everything hurts and you’re fuzzy, but you know you have to keep going. Keep fighting. 

Behind you, you don’t hear any signs of being chased. Not yet. No snapping twigs, no rustling leaves, no grunts, no groans. You’re certain it won’t last long. 

“Nightingale!” Bradley bellows, entering the woods. “Let’s just cut to the good part, dolly!”

Whimpering, you run harder and faster. Your whole body is on fire, but you hold tight to the ax and the gun. But you’re tipping over an edge, close to collapsing. So you duck behind the thick trunk of a tree, pressing your back against it. 

Your heart thumps in your ears as blood rushes across your temples. You’re panting, panicking. What are you going to do? How are you going to get away? But--no. You can’t get away. You can’t run. You have to fight.

Just as your heart begins to calm, just as your breathing starts to slow, you suddenly hear it. 

Hounds of Love is playing now--the tape scratched and skipping, distorted on the loudspeaker. It’s echoing all across camp. 

The hounds of love are hunting

I've always been a coward

“Gale!” Bradley screams, stumbling in the woods. He knows he’s hot on your trail--he can smell how afraid you are right now. “C’mon, dolly! Come on out and let’s finish this! I know you’re tired. You’re so close to giving up--I can feel it. So, just give up. Put your neck into my palms and rest. Close your eyes and let it happen! Don’t you want to see your boys again? Bradley and Bob? Mickey and Reuben?” 

He’s close--his voice is loud and clear. 

Your fingers are numb with panic. 

“You were supposed to save all of ‘em! They were counting on you…everybody was. Bob most of all--he wasn’t afraid until he woke up and saw the infection was spreading, dolly. But he thought you had him…he thought you were gonna help him.” 

It's coming for me through the trees

Oh, help me, someone

Help me, please 

Closing your eyes, you try to go deaf to his words. 

No. No. No. 

And when you fidget, a twig snaps beneath your feet. So you quickly lean down and rip your shoes off--leaving you in your bloody socks. But then you take them off, too--just to feel the soil and the thorns beneath your feet. 

Bradley looks around the woods--the sun breaks through the canopy of leaves from up above. No sign of you, but he knows he’s close. He has to be close. You can’t have made it far--not after what he did to you in the bus barn. 

From nothing real

I just can't deal with this

I'm still afraid to be there

“We were all counting on you. Your name--it’s actually the last thing that Fanboy said before he bit it. Well, before I took off the top of his head. He must’ve been panicking--scrambling, I guess. Couldn’t think of any other name but yours, dolly.” 

Clamping your hand over your mouth, you stifle your sobs. 

He’s lying, you tell yourself. He has to be. 

Bradley’s getting angry--it’s bubbling up inside of him in that ugly, ugly way. He sighs loudly, finally moving his hand from his eye. Blood drips off his chin and into the mud. 

“You’re a sad, sad little girl who can’t save anyone! You’re a sorry fucking excuse for a nurse! And a fucking coward at that! You’re hiding from me, running away from all those people you’re supposed to protect!”

I've always been a coward

And never know what's good for me

“I’m gonna head back to camp now,” Bradley taunts. “I’ll pick ‘em off--make ‘em scream for you. You’ll hear it. Wherever you are…you’ll hear it, dolly. Believe me that.” 

You have to move. You know it. Even if it’s a bluff--even if it’s a trap. 

So, with what strength and ammo you have left, you cock the gun. Bradley hears it--zeroing in on your location. You’re only a few paces before him, hiding behind a thick-trunked oak tree. 

“There you are,” he whispers as he begins to slowly walk towards you. “Good girl.” 

Shivering, you round the corner. Bradley is only a few feet in front of you, glowing beneath the afternoon sunlight. His eye is bleeding--his lashes matted with blood. 

“You’re not getting those kids,” you whisper to him. You’re pointing the gun at him, the ax on the ground beside you. Your feet are planted firmly. “You’re not getting back to that camp.”

Oh, help me, darling

Help me, please

Heart pounding, pulse thumping, you stare at Bradley. 

“You don’t have much say in the matter, do you?” He asks. He comes closer, knowing full and well that you won’t pull the trigger. Again, his chest grazes the barrels. He looks into your eyes--registers all your exhaustion. He doesn’t know how you’re still standing. “Just let go, Nightingale. Just give in.” 

He moves slowly--you watch him, eyes glossed over, as he wraps his hand around the barrels. You don’t move to stop him--not even when your heart jumps into your throat. 

“No,” you whisper, shaking your head. You swallow hard. “I’m so tired.” 

He looks at you long and hard as he pushes the barrels up towards the sky--you don’t stop him again. He steps closer to you. 

“I know,” he whispers. “Don’t you miss him? You didn’t even know when he left, dolly.”

Pain ripples across your chest, your heart constricting. 

It's in the trees

It's coming

“What happens if I let go?” You whisper. 

Bradley blinks at you. 

“You’ll sleep,” he tells you. 

Sleep. It sounds so good. So enticing. Dangerously handsome. 

“Is he…” you whisper, sniffing hard as tears prickle your eyes. “Is he sleeping?” 

He knows you mean Bradley--the real, actual Bradley. 

“Your side is so cold,” he whispers. “Come to bed.”

Come to bed. You want to. You want to so badly. 

But then you think of Bob’s broken glasses. Jake’s bloody handprints on your face. Mable’s weight on your shoulders. Phoenix holding Bob’s body. Coyote telling you the children won’t be touched. Fanboy and Payback dying together. 

“I’m tired,” you mutter. A few tears run down your face as your lip wobbles. “I’m too tired to keep going.” 

Hold me down

It's coming for me through the trees

He comes closer to you, vibrating with excitement. 

Before you can stop it, his hand is on your hip. You know it isn’t Bradley--but it looks like him. It feels like him. You don’t push his hand away. 

“Wanna go out with a bang?” He asks, grinning. He presses himself against you, his hips rutting against yours. 

Shakily, your finger falls on the trigger. 

“Yes,” you mutter to him. His hand falls on your throat again. “I wanna go out with a bang.”

And then the gunshot rings out. It sends birds fleeing, punctures your eardrum, makes Bradley recoil. And before he can retaliate, before he can wrap his hands around your throat--the tree branch, the one the bullet severed, falls onto his head. 

He crumples beneath it with a sharp intake of breath, pinning him onto the ground. 

“Gale, you--!”

Quickly, you step over him, breathing hard. 

“Fuck you,” you spit. “You’re not Bradley.” 

And with that, you bring the butt of the shotgun down against his forehead until his eyes are closed and his body is still. 

𝐅𝐎𝐎𝐓𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄: DAMN WTF.....I LOVE KATE BUSH

𝐌𝐘 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

𝐍𝐄𝐗𝐓 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑

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[ablednt]

So I’m trying to get genetic testing done for Turners Syndrome and like this guy is asking me questions to try and see like, other than my obvious height, what might lead me to think I have Turners and anyway developmental disorders are connected to turners ig so he’s trying to ask if I’m disabled but because he was I guess too scared of just asking me straight he had to first ask about my school history and I had the fun experience of having to once again clarify that no, I did not go to school, no I never got testing done I’m uneducated lmao and only THEN did he just ask me the initial question of like “do you have a learning disability” and then I had to be like yes I have multiple but they’re self diagnosed <3

So anyway that was fun/s but at least I’m getting tested soon

[bumpthis]

.

[hiraya-rawr]

Okay, okay, hear me out:

Diluc's s/o fell for him first, but he fell way harder.

That's it. Thank you for listening to me.

IM SORRY FOR THE RAMBLE BELOW

FALLING IN LOVE WITH DILUC BUT HE'S SO DESPERATE TO KEEP HIS FEELINGS FOR YOU AT BAY, TO VIEW YOU ONLY AS A GOOD FRIEND, AN ACQUAINTANCE, THAT PERSON WITH A SNORT TO THEIR LAUGH OVER HIS DRY JOKES. YOU'RE NOTHING MORE THAN ANOTHER CUSTOMER IN HIS BAR BUT HE KNOWS YOUR FAVORITE DRINKS BY HEART.

because fuck there's just so much evil in the world and he has so much to do about it and he knows he could get killed at any moment with all his enemies but CAN YOU BLAME HIM WHEN HIS FEELINGS FOR YOU START WEEPING OUT OF HIS TIGHTLY CAPPED BOTTLE. HIS EYES SEARCHING FOR YOU IN EVERY CROWD. EVEN HIS FLAMES FEEL WARMER, SOFTER WHEN YOURE AROUND LIKE HES SO COMFORTED BY YOUR EXISTENCE BUT IT SCARES HIM

can you blame him for all his lingering touches— a hand on the small of your back as he moves you aside, a grip to your wrist as he pulls you somewhere, a kiss to your knuckles because that's completely normal for a gentleman—

HE CONVINCES HIMSELF ITS COMPLETELY NORMAL TO TOUCH FRIENDS LIKE THIS BUT EFF THAT BECAUSE WE KNOW DILUC DOESNT TOUCH ANYONE IF HE COULD HELP IT.

and he's still trying to convince himself this is just what friends do as he holds you whenever you're crying at the corner of the bar over some stupid sob story; he'd kiss the sides of your face, your cheek, your nose, your forehead, your hair, all the while mentally screaming that THIS IS JUST WHAT FRIENDS DO, THIS IS JUST BECAUSE HE CARES—

and he tells himself that again even when you're resting on his bed after a long day of fighting the abyss, even when you're both washing off side by side in the lake after a muddy battle, even when you're cuddling under thermal blankets in dragonspine practically nude to share body warmth platonically—

ALL BECAUSE DILUC FUKING RAGNVINDR IS SO TERRIFIED OF LOVE AND THE IDEA OF LOVING YOU OPENLY AND GENUINELY because he knows so so well how fast he could lose someone he loves. diluc convincing himself that you're just a friend

and you're crushing on the winery tycoon, doodling his initials next to yours all the while thinking it can never be reciprocated but the man feels like he's about to burst from how much love he's holding back and how much love he wants to give you like it's an offering to a god

and diluc just—

he just—

wants to be with you despite all his willpower telling him no, because his love for you overwhelms even himself and dhjshdjshd

— drunken rambles from an angstified writer, is it obvious that im hyper rn