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naivegh0ul · 1 year ago
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i had a vision of cockwarming ghost while he's in a meeting and had to write it
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(warnings: smut, fem reader, cockwarming, exhibitionism, degradation, choking, public sex, rough sex, PiV)
(word count: 1,111)
You don't exactly remember how you got here, snuggled up on Ghost's lap, your arms wrapped around his neck and his cock plunged deep inside you.
You can hear the team talking, something about an illegal arms deal, but you're not really listening, your mind too fuzzy to pay attention. A sigh escapes your lips as you sit still and rest your head on Ghost's shoulder, feeling his chest vibrate as he talks.
After a while of this, sitting on Ghost's lap as he and the team talk business, you find yourself getting a bit restless. You squirm just a little, hips wiggling as you scoot forward on Ghost's lap.
Ghost's cock jostles inside you as you move around, his tip bumping into your sweet spot and making you whine. Ghost's voice hitches slightly but he continues, choosing to simply ignore you.
You pout at this and tilt your head upwards, looking up at Ghost with a needy expression. "What?" He grunts, looking back at you annoyedly. "You want my attention? Is that it?" Ghost asks.
Nodding your head, you hear Ghost let out a sigh and he plants his hands on your hips. Suddenly, he raises you up, leaving only the tip inside before he slams you back down harshly, his thighs slapping against yours.
You cry out from the sudden mix of pain and pleasure, your cunt tightening and gushing slick all over his shaft. "Oh, is this too much for you, baby?" Ghost asks meanly as he continues to raise you up off his cock and drop you back down, his tip kissing your cervix painfully as his broad hands dig into the meat of your hips.
"That's too bad. I'm busy, so either take what I give you or you don't get anything at all." He sighs, turning his attention away from you as he listens to the Captain, leaning back in his seat and giving his opinion as if you're not even there.
You try to keep quiet so as to not disturb the men any more than you already have but it's hard. Ghost's cock is filling you to the brim, making you release little, breathy moans, and the lewd squelching of your cunt can be heard any time there's a lull in conversation.
It's embarrassing and you can't help but whimper, your eyes wet and teary as "uhn"s and "ah"s escape your mouth . "Ghost..." You mewl, hands clawing at Ghost's shoulders as you shudder and tighten around him.
"Quiet, sweetheart. The men are talking." Ghost shushes you with a hand over your mouth. You just have to sit there and take it, thighs sticky with your juices and your body limp as Ghost uses you like a toy, blatantly ignoring you.
It doesn't take much for that familiar coil to curl in your gut, for the heat to build and make your moans become louder, although slightly muffled from Ghost's hand over your mouth. Ghost is only using one hand to pick you up now, making it more of him lifting you up slightly and grinding into you.
You attempt to warn Ghost of your impending orgasm by tightening around him and reaching up to remove his hand from your face. "Shut up." Ghost hisses as you pry his hand off of your mouth and whine up at him, your words jumbled as you pant and moan.
"But- I'm gonna- I... I..." You stutter out. Ghost seems to snap, standing up out of his chair and bringing you with him, still buried deep inside you.
"You can't follow simple fucking orders, can you? I tell you to be quiet and you think that means 'be louder'." He growls as he swipes papers off the table, letting them flutter to the floor as he drops you on to the wood.
His hands wrap around your throat, applying enough pressure to make you choke, your legs kicking as your brain goes fuzzy from the lack of oxygen. Ghost's hips pull back and thrust forward at a brutal pace as he starts to fuck you again, his balls slapping against your ass as the meeting table rocks from the force of his thrusts.
"You're gonna be a good girl and shut the fuck up, isn't that right?" Ghost says as he releases his grip on your throat for a moment, watching as you suck in a big breath of air and cough, your pussy tightening around him with each sputter.
"Yeah- ngh, yes. Yes, sir." You nod your head obediently, not entirely sure what you just agreed to but happy to agree nonetheless. You lay there helplessly as Ghost thrusts into you harshly and your tits bounce, your hands coming up to tug on your sensitive nipples as Ghost ruins you.
"You're not even fucking listening, are you?" Ghost chuckles as he sees the cockdrunk, delirious look in your eyes. He doubles down on his efforts at that revelation, determined to fuck you stupid.
"Uh-uh." You shake your head from side to side with a cheeky smile on your face, giggling mindlessly. Your silly laughs trail off into loud moans as Ghost tilts his hips upwards slightly, hitting your cervix with terrifying precision.
"That's what I thought. Just a stupid slut with an eager pussy." Ghost hooks your legs over his shoulders as he speaks and wraps his hands around your throat once more.
Soon enough, that same heat is returning. Your thighs shake as you look up at Ghost with wide eyes, lips parted as choked moans escape and overwhelmed tears spill down your face.
Ghost removes one hand from your throat, keeping the other wrapped firmly around the column of your neck and he rubs your clit with his thumb quickly, drawing tight circles on the sensitive bud.
Your back arches at the sudden stimulation, hands slapping down onto the table as you struggle to find purchase on something, anything. You don't get time to consider more options before you're cumming, cunt clenching as you cream on Ghost's cock.
Ghost growls out a low, "Fuck." before he's spilling inside you, staining your insides with his release. He pants over you, catching his breath as you lay lifelessly on the table, thighs twitching slightly and your eyes shut in pure bliss.
"So that's what it takes to shut you up, huh? A quick fuck and some guy's load? Whore." Ghost picks you up off the table, carefully lifting up your sore and sweaty body as he sits back down in his chair, keeping his soft cock inside you for the time being.
"Sorry about that, lads. Continue." Ghost grunts, getting right back to business.
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daily-sifloop · 2 months ago
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If you want a sifloop song rec I suggest 'no children' by the mountain goats it's very toxic yuri and I enjoy sifloop angst (if you want a fluffier sifloop song the only one I have is 'monster' from adventure time)
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Day 61: no children
Textless version under the cut
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glazedcroissant · 6 months ago
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Sacred Sword Galaxia
Also, another speedpaint below! :
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s0fter-sin · 1 month ago
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one of my favourite aspects of supernatural that you very rarely see in paranormal shows is that sam and dean are already versed in the world they live in. there’s no sudden discovery of ghosts and demons and now they have to learn about them along with the audience; they are born into it and already know all about it. it allows the audience to follow their personal story instead of also trying to figure out this new world and its rules
the first season is full of knowledge we never see them learn; “w*ndigoes are in the minnesota woods or- or northern michigan. i’ve never even heard of one this far west.” […] “great. well then this [his gun] is useless.” (1x02), “you don’t break a curse. you get the hell out of its way.” (1x08), d: “it’s a god. a pagan god, anyway.” […] “the annual cycle of its killings? and the fact that the victims are always a man and a woman. like some kind of fertility right.” […] s: “the last meal. given to sacrificial victims. d: “yeah, i’m thinking a ritual sacrifice to appease some pagan god.” (1x11)
almost every episode in the first season is a monster they’ve faced before that they then explain to the audience in a way that should feel patronising; like it’s the same speech given over and over again but instead, the audience almost feels included in the knowledge. it’s stated with such an innate confidence and comfort in said knowledge that it feels like we already knew it too; “spirits and demons don't have to unlock doors. if they want inside, they just go through the walls.” […] “the claws, the speed that it moves; could be a skinwalker, maybe a black dog.” (1x02), “it's biblical numerology. you know noah's ark, it rained for forty days. the number means death.” (1x04), “no no no, not the reaper, a reaper. there's reaper lore in pretty much every culture on earth, it goes by 100 different names.” […] “you said it yourself that the clock stopped, right? reapers stop time. and you can only see 'em when they're coming at you which is why i could see it and you couldn't.” (1x12)
they already know and, at least in the first season, already have what they need to kill whatever they’re hunting; already know to salt and burn bones for spirits, fire for a w*ndigo, exorcisms for demons, a silver bullet to the heart for shapeshifters. there’s only three times in the entire first season that they run into something new to them; 1x14 when sam gets his first vision that leads him to another psychic, 1x16 when dean calls caleb for help on the sigil he put together and he tells him about daevas, and 1x20 when they find out vampires are real- and they only don’t know that bc john thought they were hunted to extinction and not worth mentioning
(there’s also technically two half instances if you count one of them knowing something the other doesn’t - sam figuring out the tulpa in 1x17 and dean already knowing about the shtriga in 1x18 - but those still rely on sam and dean having prior knowledge)
even when they’re uncertain about facing something, it’s not bc they don’t know what it is; it’s precisely bc they know what it is and acknowledge that it’ll be a difficult hunt (“i don't know, man. this isn't our normal gig. i mean, demons, they don't want anything, just death and destruction for its own sake. this is big. and i wish dad was here.” 1x04)
so much of the tension in paranormal shows typically comes from the main character(s) not knowing what is happening to them/the people around them and having to find out how to resolve it. supernatural is unique in that it operates more like a police procedural. the tension comes from solving the clues and identifying patterns to figure out who (what) the killer is and intercepting before they can take another victim
it’s such a different tone to go for when compared to other shows that came both before, during, and after its run. it sets sam and dean on even footing with each other since they both have the same knowledge going in, and it puts them in a place of authority usually reserved for an outside character
the shows i compare spn to most is charmed, buffy and teen wolf; every main character in those shows are brought into the paranormal world knowing nothing, putting them on the same level as the audience, and they have their mc interact with others already knowledgeable about that world in order to overcome their problem/monster of the week. the audience organically learns about this new world as the characters learn about it. it’s a sound writing strategy that prevents “as we already know”-style exposition but something that complicates it is if your world building isn’t unique or intriguing enough, this slow introduction can become boring
we’ve seen shows like these before; sitting through the same tropes of characters learning to use their powers, struggling with no longer feeling normal/relating to the regular world around them, and not knowing how much they can trust the people already involved in this new world gets repetitive. all three shows eventually reach the same level of comfort with their new world that spn starts with but if the characters aren’t enough to draw you in, you can end up dropping it before they reach that point (and often, before the overarching plot can really kick in and evolve the show beyond the villain of the week format)
it’s the superhero origin movie in tv format; dragged out and overplayed. dropping the audience into an established world of course comes with its own problems but you also have the benefit of pre-existing established character dynamics that let the audience slot in like they’ve always been there instead of just getting to know all the characters while the characters also get to know each other
sam and dean already knowing about the supernatural lets the audience immediately get to the core of the story; the conflict between sam and dean, the search for their father, and the mystery of what killed their mother
#i could go on forever theres literally so many examples#dean figuring the ‘two dark doubles’ is a shapeshifter sam figuring out the changing ghost is a tulpa#also peak how many of these examples come from dean despite them pushing so hard for sam to be the one knowing hunting theory#this format is why i cant stand watching the first season of charmed despite loving it so much#i just cant be bothered watching them have the same struggle ive seen a hundred times play out again#different genre but sons of anarchy does this well too; all the characters are already in the club life and already have inner conflict#spn having such a natural introduction makes me so glad they didnt go with the original plan of sam not knowing about hunting#that wouldve been Painful#watching spn so young has really shaped my view of media bc i legit cant stand things with a learning curve#give me an established world damnit#lord of the rings never stops to explain what a dwarf is! you just go with it! and it rules!#dean is just as theoretical and lore savvy as sam and id go as far to say he actually knows more#instead of trying to do this bullshit brains v brawn divide they shouldve done new tech vs analogue#sams laptop is famous and he also knows how to hack thing where the second dean doesnt know something he defaults to books#have dean be the one where if its written down he can find it almost like a proto bobby#they even kind of support that by him being the one to find the phoenix in s6 when they go through all their books#but this was 2005 and characters could only be so conplex and theyd already decided dean needed to be the hot one and sams the nerd one#side note how many of these metas am i going to write on this rewatch? tbd#side side note included all the quotes and episode numbers makes me feel so academic#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#carry on my wayward son#talk meta to me#meta#supernatural meta#spn#supernatural#dean winchester#sam winchester#save post
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aurumdrake · 5 months ago
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Smaugust Circle Day 6 - Flat
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flat fuck tuesday friday
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piratekane · 2 years ago
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Their phones go off at the same time, a tiny ding that echoes across their apartment. Mary frowns at Shannon’s phone, Shannon frowns at Mary’s, and they both reach at the same time.
“Beatrice,” Mary reads off Shannon’s phone.
Shannon turns Mary’s phone right side up and purses her lips. “Ava.”
Mary groans and lets her head fall back against the couch. “What did they get themselves into this time?”
Shannon pats her leg gently before she steals a chip right out of the bag Mary is still clutching. She throws one back, mouth puckering at the salt and vinegar taste. “Between the two of them? It could be anything.”
Mary blindly thumbs her passcode out and the screen brightens. Shannon opens her messages app. 
Their larger group message - F is for friends who do things together - sits towards the top of Shannon’s messages list, just below the other group message that lists her, Lilith, and Beatrice as its only members. 
Mary’s messages also has a group message named lilith stop changing the group name back to something boring between her, Ava, and Lilith.
“On three?”
They both open their individual messages at the same time. Mary hums something unintelligible. Shannon frowns.
“Ava went-”
“-on a date.”
Shannon leans over to read Mary’s screen.
Ava (8:41 PM): halp i went on a date
Bea (8:41 PM): Ava went on a date last week.
“Did you-”
“-know Ava was seeing someone?” Mary shakes her head. “Did you-”
“-know Ava was interested in seeing anyone?” Shannon shakes her head this time.
Mary hums again, interest piqued. She abandons the bag of chips, brushing her hand off on her dark jeans. Shannon absently reaches over and brushes the crumbs onto the floor. They can vacuum later. When Mary cradles her phone and sinks back against the couch again, Shannon follows her, pulling her legs up under herself as she leans into Mary’s side.
“What are you going to say?”
Mary regards her. “What are you going to say?”
Shannon shrugs. “I’m going to ask Beatrice who the date was with.”
“I’m going to ask Ava that too.”
It’s a race to see who can text back first, and Mary beats Shannon by a few strikes of her thumb against the glass screen. Shannon pulls Mary’s phone over so she can read it.
Mary (8:43 PM): who?
“Who?” she reads. “That’s all you said?”
Mary shrugs, unbothered. “What did you say?”
Shannon (8:43 PM): Who did she go out with?
“I used a full sentence.”
“It’s texting, babe. Full sentences are for-” Mary stops when Shannon arches an eyebrow in a challenge. She smiles, all teeth. “Full sentences are for losers.”
“This loser makes your dinner,” Shannon reminds her.
Mary is still grinning. “I can dial a phone, you know. A whole world of food, right at my fingertips. Besides, don’t pretend like I don’t make a mean chili.” She nods knowingly when Shannon rolls her eyes. “That’s half the reason you’re in love with me, admit it.”
“Yeah, the other half is because of your humility.” Shannon doesn’t bother softening it and Mary laughs. “So humble.”
Mary’s next words are swallowed up by the ding of her phone, Shannon’s phone is half a second behind.
“Who is JC?” Mary asks.
“Someone in Ava’s biology class,” Shannon answers, reading off her phone. “At least, I’m assuming? Bea said Ava went out with someone from her biology class.”
Mary snorts. “Figures that if Ava isn’t giving me all the pieces, Bea is giving the rest to you.”
Shannon smacks Mary’s knee gently. “Don’t be mean. She’s trying.”
“Who, Bea?”
“Ava.”
Mary shakes her head, hiding the smile on her face. “She’s something, that’s for sure.”
Shannon snorts. “Don’t pretend like that kid isn’t one of your favorite people. You have a terrible poker face.” 
Mary’s smile sours into a meaningless scowl. “No, I don’t.” She pulls her phone away from Shannon and thinks for a minute.
Mary (8:44 PM): scale of 1 to 10.
“That’s what you’re going with?” Shannon’s fingers hover over the phone, thinking. “A hotness scale?” 
Mary shrugs. “What’re you going to say?”
“Well I’m not going to ask if he’s cute.”
Mary shrugs again. “Of course not. Bea doesn’t care if he’s hot or not.” She nods at Shannon’s phone. “What’ve you got, Masters?”
“I’ve got a girl in love with her best friend at the other end of these messages. So I need to be… delicate.” 
Mary softens when Shannon looks back at her. “I know.” 
She watches as Shannon turns back to her phone, forehead wrinkling in thought.
Shannon (8:44 PM): How do you think that went?
Satisfied, Shannon sinks further into Mary’s side, warm and soft. Mary smiles, her hand curling around Shannon’s knee, pressing gently against a scar left behind after an ACL tear when she was younger.
They’ve always slotted together so perfectly. They knew it from the moment they met, two terrified freshmen on a large campus with no friends. The study sessions, the lunch breaks between classes. When Shannon finally leaned in, finally curled her fingers around Mary’s jaw and closed her eyes, they each felt something click. A world opened up. Study sessions turned into makeout sessions. Lunch breaks that felt like dates became actual dates. 
Mary had been looking for a home for years. She finally knew what it was like to have one.
Shannon walks her fingers over Mary’s knee. “Do you think they realize we’re sitting right next to each other? I feel like they don’t—otherwise they wouldn’t be talking to us about this.”
Mary shrugs. “It’s Tuesday. You usually work on Tuesday nights. So I’m sure Bea thinks you’re just killing time on your shift, and Ava assumes I’m looking for some kind of entertainment.” 
“Is this entertaining for you?”
Mary grins. “Like you wouldn’t believe.”
Their phones beep almost simultaneously.
Ava (8:44 PM): mid-8 nice smile
Bea (8:44 PM): She said it wasn’t groundbreaking.
“Groundbreaking,” Mary repeats. “Ava said it wasn’t groundbreaking?”
“You would know, wouldn’t you?” Shannon shrugs and reaches for the bag of chips again. She doesn’t like salt and vinegar, but she’s also committed to not getting up for anything short of an apocalypse. “Beatrice doesn’t usually misquote people, though.”
Mary makes a face. “Kid surprises me every day.” She hums quietly.
Mary (8:45 PM): and it took you this long to tell me?
Ava (8:45 PM): okay in my defense Ava (8:45 PM): no i’ve got nothing
Mary (8:46 PM): what happened?
She knows Ava. Something had to have happened for her to bring this up. Because she probably buried a terrible date, said forget about it, and focused on other things. Like her next iced coffee. Or Bea.
Ava (8:46 PM): we ran into JC at dinner tonight Ava (8:46 PM): it was weird Ava (8:46 PM): bea has been idk  Ava (8:46 PM): quiet 
Mary snorts. “No shit,” she says out loud. But her brow wrinkles in concern.
Mary (8:46 PM): was he a dick?
Ava (8:47 PM): no, definitely not he’s really nice
Mary nods to herself. Good. Because she’s been short on gym sessions this week, and she could go a few rounds with someone to make up for the difference. Shannon nudges her, catching her attention. “Right. Okay.”
Mary (8:47 PM): going out again?
Shannon rolls her eyes. “You’re so verbose.”
“Don’t be using those million dollar words on me. We’re not all in school for this kind of stuff.”
“Ha.” Shannon elbows Mary gently, soothing the sting of it with a quick press of her lips to Mary’s shoulder. “This kind of stuff is just talking to people, Mary. It’s not limited to just future social workers.”
“Maybe I’m not good at that.”
“I think you’re not giving yourself enough credit.”
“Well I think-” Mary cuts off when Shannon’s elbow digs into her side again. She huffs. “Fine. We’re both incredible. I can already see the headlines when you win social worker of the year.”
“That’s not actually a thing,” Shannon points out.
Mary’s face softens, her eyes going somewhere far away for a moment. “It should be. Could have used someone like you when I was in the system.” Shannon’s hand spreads out against Mary’s thigh, warm and weighted. Mary meets Shannon’s eyes, a hesitant smile on her face. “But I know you’ll make sure they’ve got it better than I did.”
“Of course,” Shannon promises quietly.
For a long moment, the air stills between them. Shannon can picture Mary in her freshman year - hard-headed and brash and walls pulled up to her chin. She’s still hard-headed, still brash. But the walls are knee-height now and crumbling every day as Mary lets herself breathe, surrounded by their friends. 
Mary finally smiles and squeezes Shannon’s knee, pouring a thousand unsaid words into her touch. She wants Shannon to know that she saved her life, but sometimes the words don’t come out the right way. So she puts it into touch and hopes that Shannon gets it.
Bea (8:48 PM): Shannon? You still there?
Shannon blinks, the world rushing back in on her. Ava, Bea. Their back and forth high wire act where each of them are afraid to fall - even if Ava doesn’t know that yet.
Shannon (8:48 PM): Sorry, just needed a moment. Shannon (8:48 PM): Does a date need to be groundbreaking?
Bea (8:48 PM) According to Ava, it’s a requirement.
“Want takeout tonight?” Mary asks as they wait. She opens her mouth but the words are cut off as her phone goes off.
Ava (8:48 PM): no, no more dates for me. he’s nice but it’s not groundbreaking
Mary holds up her phone. “Guess Bea wasn’t kidding.”
“Told you,” Shannon says, preening only a little bit. 
Mary (8:49 PM): that’s a lot of expectation going into a first date
Ava (8:49 PM): can’t i have a great romance?
Mary pauses. Of course Ava deserves a great romance. But what is that, exactly? Because she’s sat through movie nights with Ava, people-watched with Ava. She knows Ava thinks The Notebook is romantic and that’s toxic as hell. She knows Ava thinks the two guys who sit under the tree at the quad and share a single iced coffee is romantic, and that’s just gross. 
She knows Ava thinks what she has with Shannon is romantic, and she’s not wrong about that.
“Ask Bea what Ava thinks is ‘groundbreaking’,” she instructs Shannon. She’s curious what the rating system is here.
Shannon (8:49 PM): What does Ava think is groundbreaking? 
Bea (8:49 PM): Leaving the orphanage. Meeting us.
Mary shakes her head. “No way Ava didn’t actually say ‘meeting Beatrice.”
Shannon (8:50 PM): Are you sure she didn’t mean meeting you?
Mary raises an eyebrow in surprise. “Nice and direct there, Masters. I thought you were being delicate.” 
Shannon shrugs and waits patiently for Bea’s response. Sometimes Bea reminds her of the fawn she came across once as a child. Skittish, awkward limbs everywhere as it tried to find its footing and run. But when Shannon approached it, hand out and open, it let her get close. It took a few minutes, Shannon suspended in the middle of the woods. But it slowly approached her and let her touch it, nuzzling into her hand. Beatrice can be like that: skittish, but seeking out comforting touches.
She always thought that it was the best way to approach Bea: slowly, hand open. Ava proved her wrong, crash-landing into Bea’s life with a gracelessness that was endearing from the very beginning. Maybe Bea just needed the right person to cut through her trepidation and bring her out of her shell.
“You can be delicate and still be direct. It just has to be a precision hit,” she replies.
“Hammer vs scalpel,” Mary says nodding. It’s just funny because she and Shannon are always so careful around Bea, whereas Ava always seems to need more of a blunt punch of truth. 
Speaking of which. Okay, so if that’s what Ava thinks…Mary cycles through things in her mind. How does she go about this? If meeting Bea was groundbreaking, then a great romance has to be the same thing. Synonymous, like Mary and Shannon. Her eyes flutter closed as she thinks. Maybe Shannon has a point on blending her approach. 
Ava always thought that mopey girl meeting the vampire was a great romance. And she knows this, but Ava has terrible taste in movies. She really needs to watch something of substance. Like Love and Basketball. But she can work with this.
Mary (8:50 PM): thought great romances were reserved for your vampire book
Mary has a plan. She’s easing Ava into a conversation. Because Mary knows that Ava wants a great romance. More importantly, she deserves it. She just might not know that she wants - and deserves it - with Beatrice.
Their phones ding in double time, the replies chasing after each other. 
Bea (8:51 PM): I’m sure she meant ‘us’ and not me.
Ava (8:51 PM): bella isn’t the only one who deserves a sparkly love interest
Mary puts her phone down for a moment. “How are we doing this?”
Shannon thinks about it for a minute. “I’m not sure,” she admits.
Mary sighs. “Ava can be as dense as that meatloaf you made once and - hey! It was!” She ducks the hand Shannon sends towards her shoulder. “I just mean, she’s either sitting behind a huge wall named Denial, or she really doesn’t get it. So we need to, like, be smart about this.” She sighs. “Why are we doing this?”
“Because Lilith would do a horrible job at it?”
Mary snorts. “You got that right.”
At least Ava knows she deserves happiness. Kid hasn’t had a lot of love in her life, with the raw deal she got growing up. Mary knows something about that. So maybe Ava doesn’t need a delicate touch, but a little positive reinforcement and reassurance that she does deserve love from someone who gets it doesn’t hurt.
Mary (8:53 PM) no kid, you do too
“Bea is just as bad.” Shannon holds up her phone. “I know for a fact that Ava said Bea and not us, but she’s going to pretend like that isn’t true because that means she has to face a reality where Ava feels the same way about her as she does about Ava.”
“Maybe you should have gone into psychology.”
Shannon makes a face. “Absolutely not.” 
Shannon (8:53 PM): Bea. Even if she didn’t say you, you’re allowed to want her to have.  Shannon (8:53 PM): And if she did, you’re allowed to acknowledge what that means.
Bea (8:54 PM): I’m not sure what it means.
Shannon groans as she reads Bea’s response. She takes a deep, steadying breath. She loves Beatrice. She’s loved her from the minute they crossed paths in their English seminar - a sophomore level class that Bea tested into. But for someone so smart, she sometimes tends to miss signs right in front of her face. 
No, Shannon thinks. She can read the signs. But the years with her parents… Maybe she just doesn’t want to see them. Maybe she doesn’t trust them. Maybe she just needs a little nudge.
Shannon (8:55 PM): I think you know what it means.
Mary breaks her concentration as she reads Ava’s text out loud, forehead pinched in thought. 
Ava (8:55 PM): i just don’t know if i’ll get it.
Mary sighs. “Are we sure Lilith can’t do this?” She goes to text back, but three grey dots pop up before she can, so she waits.
Ava (8:55 PM): but i think Ava (8:55 PM): i think i realized something
She shoves her phone under Shannon’s nose, all thoughts of Lilith taking over flying out of her mind. “Babe.”
Shannon’s reply is swallowed up by Bea’s next message. 
Bea (8:56 PM): Correction: I don’t think I’m allowed to want it to mean what I think it means.
Shannon sighs. “Oh, Bea.”
Mary doesn’t hear her, too wrapped up as she frantically types, backspaces, types, and backspaces again. “Do I play dumb?” she asks herself. “Or do I just say finally?” She types something out and erases it one more time before she sends something.
Mary (8:56 PM): what’s that?
Shannon (8:57 PM): And in a perfect world, what do you want it to mean?”
Three grey dots pop up on Mary’s screen and linger there long enough that Mary puts her phone down and picks through her bag of chips until she finds one big enough that when she fits the whole thing in her mouth, she has to blow out her cheeks to keep it in there. Shannon makes a noise of mild disgust.
Shannon’s phone beeps first. 
Bea (8:58 PM): I think you know.
Shannon (8:58 PM) Lightning won’t strike you down if you say it.
“Might,” Mary mumbles through a mouthful of chips. Shannon’s eyes cut to her. “What? You know Bea is thinking it.” 
Shannon can’t really argue with that, so she doesn’t try. She just waits for Bea’s response, which comes quicker than she thought it might. 
Bea (8:59 PM): I want her to mean that I’m groundbreaking.
“Atta girl,” Shannon whispers to herself.
Shannon (8:59 PM): You are.
Mary’s phone finally beeps. 
Ava (8:59 PM): i was thinking about it and Ava (8:59 PM): bea is groundbreaking, you know?
Mary (9:00 PM): obviously
It’s a gut reaction, but Mary texts back before she can stop herself. She almost follows it up with something softer to cut the edge off it. 
But she’s been watching Ava trip over herself the last few months and honestly, it’s a bit exhausting to not want to sit her down and bop her over the head with a printed book of all the texts Ava has sent her talking about how Bea looks today, or what Bea said today, or how she wants to do something, but has to check with Bea first.
The book would cost her an insane amount of money to print and it would be bigger than the Shakespeare text she uses as a door stopper since she spilled orange juice on it and can’t sell it back.
Ava (9:00 PM): what do you mean obviously?! Ava (9:00 PM): mary Ava (9:00 PM): mARY Ava (9:00 PM): what does THAT mean?!
Mary stifles a laugh, lets a sigh slip through, and closes her phone. She lets her head fall to the back of the couch and takes a deep breath. “I shouldn’t have said anything.”
Mary’s phone goes off again, beep after beep after beep after beep. She doesn’t dare pick it up. 
Shannon picks up Mary’s phone, types in the passcode, and chuckles as she catches up on Ava’s messages. “You really shouldn’t have.”
Then her own phone dings, catching her attention.
Bea (9:02 PM) But I’m not sure she really feels that way. Surely, she would say something.
“Do you ever want to wrap them up in, like, the world’s tightest hug?” Shannon asks.
“Sometimes I want to wrap them to a post and leave them there until they figure their shit out.”
Mary’s phone goes off again and she picks it up this time, opening her messages.
Ava (9:02 PM): there’s nothing OBVIOUS about it Ava (9:02 PM): it’s rude actually Ava (9:02 PM): to say something like that and just NOT ANSWER UR MESSAGES Ava (9:02 PM): Mary pick up your phone. Ava (9:01 PM): at least when i told bea it wasn’t groundbreaking she didn’t go RADIO SILENT Ava (9:01 PM): in fact we went out for coffee because i got bea one but Ava (9:01 PM): wait
Mary smiles slowly. There it is.
Shannon glances at Mary, most of her attention still on her conversation with Bea. She’s making headway, she can feel it. Bea at least admitting that Ava could maybe feel the same way about her is step one. Step two is getting Bea to just say it out loud.
Shannon (9:03 PM): She can’t say something if she doesn’t know.
Bea (9:03 PM): I certainly can’t tell her.
Mary reads over her shoulder. “She certainly should. Because it would save all of us a lot of trouble.”
Ava (9:04 PM): Mary.
Mary (9:04 PM): Ava
“How do you tell someone that the person they’re hopelessly in love with is hopelessly in love with them? Asking for a friend.”
Shannon ignores her.
Shannon (9:05 PM): Bea, you don’t need to tell her right now. Shannon (9:05 PM): But you should think about it.
“What do you think the odds are that they’re sitting next to each other on the couch right now?”
Shannon snorts. “That sounds exactly like something they would do.”
“Picture it,” Mary continues. “Sitting on opposite ends of the couch but you know Ava’s got her feet all over Bea which is disgusting. And they’re probably having a charged conversation where they talk about the weather being nice, but Ava is really talking about Bea’s eyes or whatever. And they’re just… texting us about each other.”
Shannon laughs this time. “How did we end up like this? Mom-ing two helplessly in-love-with-each-other - and I say this affectionately - idiots?”
“I must have really pissed someone off in a past life.” 
Ava (9:05 PM): bea IS groundbreaking
Mary (9:05 PM): you’re repeating yourself
Ava (9:05 PM): i’ve always thought so
Mary (9:06 PM): i’m not going to argue with you
Mary leans into Shannon’s side. “Be honest. They would benefit from some professional help, wouldn’t they?” She dodges Shannon’s hand again. “Or at least someone like Camila. If Ava wants to go for a drink or throw some darts or fix an engine, I can do that.”
“Okay dad,” Shannon snorts.
Bea (9:07 PM): I can’t think about it. Because if I think about it, I’m going to tell her. And if I tell her and she doesn’t say it back, I don’t know what I’ll do.
Shannon (9:07 PM): You’ll do what you always do. Persevere.  Shannon (9:07 PM): But I don’t think you’ll need to.
Mary’s screen lights up with a text that she thinks about ignoring. She shouldn’t have opened this box, shouldn’t have pried at the lock that held back this little revelation. She should have just said it was nice that Ava went on a date and left it at this JC guy being an 8. She should have put down her phone and focused on wowing Shannon with the pico de gallo she managed to make earlier.
Ava (9:07 PM): she’s my favorite person, full offense
Mary (9:08 PM): like that’s going to offend me. i’m shannon’s
Ava (9:08 PM): do you think i’m bea’s
Mary drops her phone. “Nope. I’m not doing this.”
“Don’t be dramatic.” Shannon picks up the abandoned phone and scrolls back a few messages, eyes tracking the conversation. She laughs at Ava’s last message, before handing the phone back to Mary. “Ava loves fishing for compliments, doesn’t she?”
“She’s fishing in the wrong pond,” Mary retorts, punching out a quick response. 
Mary (9:09 PM): focus, silva
“She should try the other side of her couch.”
Shannon glances at her own phone and considers what the person sitting on the other side of Ava’s couch is thinking at this very moment. A minute stretches on with nothing from Bea. Shannon starts to worry her bottom lip between her teeth. 
She’s not trying to push. But Bea deserves something amazing to happen to her. And they can all - even Mary - admit that Ava is the most amazing thing that’s happened to Beatrice.  A needed respite for all the ways the world has let Bea down in the past. She nearly drops her phone in relief when it goes off.
Bea (9:11 PM): I’m not ready.
Shannon (9:11 PM): No one is ever ready for love.
Bea (9:12 PM): What if I never am?
There’s a fluttering in Shannon’s chest where her heart skips a beat at Bea’s text. Bea is so much more ready than she thinks she is, Shannon knows it. But she also knows that Bea’s parents run deep in her mind and that’s hard to overcome. It doesn’t matter, though. If she knows anything about Ava, she knows that her patience with Bea is neverending.
Shannon (9:13 PM): Someone who loves you won’t worry about that. Someone who loves you will want you to take your time, if that’s what you need. Love isn’t linear, Bea.
Three dots appear on her screen for a long moment before they disappear. Shannon takes a deep breath and hopes she hasn’t pushed it. 
Needing something else to do, she peers at Mary’s phone. “Are you-” 
A beep cuts her off.
Ava (9:13 PM): right. but if SHE’S groundbreaking that means…
“She’s going to be the death of me,” Mary groans.
Mary (9:13 PM): that means…
Ava (9:14 PM): hypothetical question Ava (9:14 PM): how do you know if you’re in love with your best friend or not?
“Finally!!”
“Mary,” Shannon scolds.
Mary (9:14 PM) i’m sure there’s a buzzfeed quiz for that
“Mary.”
Ava (9:15 PM): mary 
Mary (9:15 PM): ava 
Ava (9:15 PM): i’m serious
Mary (9:16 PM) so am i  Mary (9:17 PM): but if you don’t want to dig through the internet to find one Mary (9:17 PM): let me tell you what your results would be Mary (9:17 PM): you are
Shannon’s phone goes off and she mistypes her passcode twice before she manages to get it open. Mary leans over, hooking her chin on Shannon’s shoulder to read the message with her.
Bea (9:18 PM): She deserves someone who isn’t afraid to be in love with her.
“That’s not fair,” Mary says quietly. “That’s not fair to her.”
Shannon frowns. “To Ava?”
“To Bea.”
Shannon (9:19 PM): You’re not afraid to be in love with her. You’re afraid of the world around your love. Your parents did a number on you, Bea. That takes time to get over.
Their phones go quiet for a while. So long that Mary gets up and puts away the chips, and Shannon tidies up the kitchen. They decide on getting Thai for dinner because Ava sent them a Snapchat of her leftovers this morning with Bea in the background wearing a disapproving face. Ava had captioned it: she doesn’t like it when i eat over the sink.
By the time she finishes setting out the plates for dinner, Mary is just about to give up on her conversation with Ava. It’s stalled out. Ava will swing by before her class tomorrow for pancakes at the student cafeteria, and they’ll talk about whatever Ava is obsessed with this week - last week it was the manatees she saw in a video when she was supposed to be studying for an exam. They’ll pretend like this never happened, like Ava didn’t come to some big revelation on a Tuesday night in the middle of February while Mary is in her socks with the little handcuffs on them.
She likes that idea. That works best for her. But just as she thinks it, her phone beeps.
Ava (9:31 PM): i am?
Mary (9:31 PM): do you not know that?
“Shannon, help me,” Mary groans, even as she starts texting back. 
Ava (9:32 PM): there’s a lot i’m realizing i don’t know right now
“Go fucking figure,” she mutters. Her fingers fly over the keyboard.
Mary (9:32 PM): let me break it down for you. you went out with this guy last week?
Ava (9:32 PM): tuesday yeah
Mary (9:33 PM): and it was okay Mary (9:33 PM): it wasn’t groundbreaking or earth-shattering or anything that totally rocked your world Mary (9:33 PM): but your best friend is someone who checks all those boxes?
There’s another long pause, another minute of three gray dots dancing on her screen before Ava’s text pops up in its place.
Ava (9:35 PM): you’ve met her
Mary (9:36 PM): but i don’t think the sun shines out of her ass Mary (9:36 PM): and she’s one of my best friends, but i don’t know if i’d call her earth-shaking or whatever  Mary (9:37 PM): because i’m not in love with her.  Mary (9:37 PM): i don’t spend every moment talking to her or about her or wishing i could do those things Mary (9:38 PM): but you…
Mary glances at Shannon but she’s too busy, bent over her phone. She doesn’t even notice the eye roll that Mary sends her phone. Or the tongue she sticks out. Or that she immediately goes to her internet browser, finds the picture she’s looking for, and saves Ava’s new contact image as a clown.
Across the room, Shannon sits back on the couch and stares intently at her screen, willing a message to come through even as it remains blank. She sends out a quiet prayer to whoever is listening that Beatrice allows herself to give into this feeling, to let herself feel like she deserves this kind of love. 
Finally, a bubble pops up.
Beatrice (9:39 PM): I should be over it.
Shannon frowns.
Shannon (9:39 PM): Show me the person who says you should be over it.
Beatrice (9:39 PM): I’m afraid I’d be looking in a mirror.
“Oh, Bea,” Shannon breathes. She has to take a minute. She has to breathe in slowly and count to 7 before she exhales and counts to 11, and in between those spaces she feels her heart break just a little bit.
Shannon (9: 40 PM): Then cover your mirrors and come talk to me instead.
Satisfied with her clown selection, Mary plops down next to Shannon and switches back to her conversation with Ava. She realizes she’s just dropping bomb after bomb right now, throwing them like firecrackers and imagining Ava dance around them. She can practically see them exploding in Ava’s eyes as Mary’s words rearrange what Ava had thought before this conversation.
This is big. This is Mary holding up a mirror to Ava’s face and telling her to look at the truth. Part of her knows she’s going to regret this. If Ava didn’t shut up about Bea before, now that Mary has said something, has opened the proverbial door… God, she’s going to be so annoying.
Ava (9:41 PM): there’s so much to say about her though Ava (9:41 PM): she’s funny and she’s insanely intelligent Ava (9:41 PM): and she’s the first person i want to talk to when something good happens Ava (9:42 PM): or something bad Ava (9:42 PM): or something funny  Ava (9:42 PM): oh. Ava (9:42 PM): shit. 
Something occurs to Mary, and she closes her messages, opening her phone’s calendar. She scrolls back a week and her eyes widen as she reads the date.
Mary (9:43 PM): girl, i just checked the calendar. you went out with this guy on valentine’s day?!
Ava (9:43 PM): i didn’t notice!
Mary (9:43 PM): and THEN you went home and took BEA out for coffee?
Ava (9:44 PM): which wasn’t a date
Mary (9:44 PM): from the sounds of it, coulda fooled me
Mary nearly throws her phone but the only place for it to go is over Shannon’s legs onto the other couch cushion. 
And Shannon has that look on her face like she wants to cry or scream or do both, so Mary’s priorities shift. She puts the phone down on the table and turns, sliding one arm across Shannon’s shoulders and rubs her fingers against the bone there.
“Hey,” she murmurs. “You okay?”
“I don’t know why she’s so hard on herself.” Shannon sighs. “I mean, I know why she is. And if I ever meet her parents-”
“There’s a line, I know.”
“And I’m at the front of it.”
Mary smiles humorlessly. “I think you might be second.”
“Good,” Shannon murmurs. “Bea needs as many people in her life as she can get.”
“Who she has is a good place to start.” Mary rubs at Shannon’s shoulder again and leans forward, pressing a soft kiss to the side of her head.
Bea (9:46 PM): Ava says that sometimes, she wishes she could fight my mind for me.
Shannon (9:46 PM): I think you should let her.
Bea (9:47 PM): I think she would win.
Shannon (9:47 PM): Good Shannon (9:47 PM): It’s because she loves you, Beatrice.
Bea (9: 48 PM): I’m worried that, if she ever did, that feeling would be long gone before I was ready.
Mary shifts away as Shannon focuses on her phone, tongue poked out between her teeth as she starts a long message. It’s been a minute since Ava texted her back. A long time for Ava, who fires off texts as quickly as her thoughts come. But this whole conversation has been filled with pauses. It’s a different side of Ava.
It’s an Ava who had the world shift and is now dealing with the fallout. Mary gets it.
But she wonders, is deciding to be in a relationship so hard for other people? 
Because it wasn’t hard for her. It was probably one of the easiest things she’s ever done in her life. It happened so naturally, so - what’s the word Camila says? Organically. She’s so in love with Shannon, even if she shrugs it off when people poke fun at her for it. She’s not above telling anyone how much Shannon means to her, but she is better at showing it. 
Acts of service, Camila told her, when they did some stupid quiz where they asked about love languages. She hadn’t even known there were so many of them. She always thought she was just kind of okay at loving Shannon. Turns out, she was doing better than she thought, giving Shannon what it seemed like she wanted and needed. And once she figured it out, it happened as naturally as their relationship did. Maybe they just got lucky to have it so easy. 
Her phone beeps and Mary rolls her eyes at Ava’s message. Or maybe she and Shannon were just smart enough to use their damn words.
Ava (9:48 PM): do you think she’d want to go out with me?
Mary (9:48 PM): i don’t get paid enough for this conversation.
Ava (9:49 PM): my friendship is payment enough
Shannon hears Mary huff, feels the air across her shoulder. But she’s too busy to turn and give her the attention, too focused to hear about whatever thing Ava said that made Mary feel like she needed to pretend to be annoyed. Because she’s trying to come up with something to make Bea understand that she is worth all the praise people bestow on her. She’s so brave, so committed to healing the wounds her parents etched into her.
Bea needs to know that despite them, she is coming into who she deserves to be. And she’s got someone she deserves to love within her reach.
Shannon (9:51 PM): Anyone who is worth your time will understand and hold that space for you until you’re ready for something so big. You ARE making progress, Bea. I remember you as a freshman, so afraid of your own shadow. And now you’re bold and strong. You’ve come so far. And Ava has been a big part of that. She’s brought out this part of you that everyone knew you had, but you were too afraid to show. Shannon (9:52 PM): She’s good for you.
And before Bea can say anything, Shannon texts her again.
Shannon (9:52 PM): I know you’d be good for her too.
Shannon bites her lip and thinks before she types out, “You should tell her how you feel. She won’t say no.” But she stops and erases it. Maybe it’s too much for Bea to handle right now. Maybe she needs to slow down.
But another part of her, a voice that whispers excitedly in her ear and sounds just like her mother before she gives away a particularly juicy bit of gossip, says, “You could say it.” 
She could. She could be the little push that gets the cart rolling. She could be the one at their wedding telling this story. She can see it in her mind: Bea, flushed with embarrassment. Ava, smiling fondly and teasing Bea for having a crush on her. She can hear the glasses clinking as people call for a kiss and feel the claps on her shoulder when people thank her for helping them take that first step.
Mary sinks further back into the couch and stretches her legs out on the coffee table. Shannon doesn’t even notice. She’s working something over in her mind, and she has this look on her face. Mary can see the wheels turning, recognizes exactly where she’s seen that look before, and she doesn’t like where they’re going.
“We’re not playing matchmaker,” she warns.
Shannon’s cheeks pinken slightly. “Did I say we were going to play matchmakers?”
“You didn’t have to. I can see it written all over your face.” Mary shakes her head when Shannon opens her mouth to argue, resolutely. “I’m not getting in the middle of this.”
“We’re already in the middle of this,” Shannon points out.
“Fine. We’re not getting more in the middle of this.” Mary says it firmly. “These two idiots need to figure the rest out on their own. They don’t need hand-holding.”
“I think that this conversation has proven they need hand-holding,” Shannon argues. 
Mary can’t tell her that’s not true, because it is. Ava is coming to a lot of realizations tonight, and she wouldn’t have gotten there without Mary sticking herself into the middle of it. She knows it. Shannon knows it. And that infuriatingly addictive smile slowly stretching across her face, transforming into a full blown grin means Shannon knows she knows it too. 
“No,” she warns. She opens her mouth to say more when her phone goes off again.
Ava (9:53 PM): mary, i can’t not think about this now
Mary (9: 54 PM): could you talk to me about it a little less?
Ava (9:55 PM): but you’re the only one who knows!
Mary snorts. “I don’t think you’re that slick, kid.”
Shannon laughs as she reads it. “No, the only one who doesn’t know is Bea.” Her head tilts to the side, a knowing look crossing her face. “You still think they don’t need a little nudge?” 
Mary sighs, surrendering to Shannon’s logic and gives in.
Mary (9:56 PM): listen, baby girl. don’t just think about it. do something about it! 
Ava (9:56 PM): i don’t want to do something she doesn’t want to do Ava (9:56 PM): this isn’t trying jamaican food from the burrito place Ava (9:56 PM): this is our friendship
This means the world to me, Mary reads between the lines. She can’t help but smile. Mary talks a lot of shit most days, grunts her way through conversations that require a bit more finesse than she’s comfortable with, but she’s got a soft spot for her friends. A softer spot for Ava.
Ava (9:57 PM): i don’t wanna fuck this up
Ava has a lot of them wrapped around her finger. Even Lilith, who would never admit it, even under penalty of death. But it’s there. It’s real. They’d all go to the ends of the Earth for Ava Silva. Beatrice would be leading the charge.
Mary (9:57 PM): then just hold onto it for now. you don’t have to say anything yet Mary (9:58 PM): but you should think about it Mary (9:58 PM): because i think you’d be good together.  Mary (9:59 PM): and you’re right. you deserve a sparkly love interest. and bea is miles better looking than that edward guy
Ava (9:59): i knew you were paying attention last weekend
Mary (9:59 PM): you don’t know shit
Ava sends back an emoji with its tongue hanging out and its eyes rolling around its head. Mary closes her phone. That’s enough for tonight.
Shannon opens her phone one last time. Bea probably won’t text her back tonight, but that’s okay. She doesn’t open herself up a lot, doesn’t always tell Shannon what she’s thinking. She hopes Bea does that with Ava. She hopes Bea lets Ava see all the parts of herself that she hides away from everyone else, afraid to look those parts of herself in the eyes. 
Because Bea deserves it. Bea, in Ava’s words, deserves her own great romance.
She deserves it with someone who loves her as much as Ava seems like she does.
And Ava might not have known it. Ava may have just figured it out tonight, pieces she didn’t notice independently coming together into a whole picture. But Ava does now. And Ava will continue to love Bea the way she deserves to be loved. Shannon knows it just by looking at the two of them together. The way they fit so easily, the way she fits with Mary.
Shannon (10:00 PM): Be honest. Be direct. Tell her how you feel. If you never say anything, you’ll never know and you might just miss your chance. Shannon (10:00 PM): Just use your words, Beatrice. You’ll be surprised what happens when you do.
She sighs, sinking down into the cushion and dropping her head down on Mary’s shoulder. “We’re totally the parents of the friend group.”
“I hate that.”
Shannon smiles as she turns her head, pressing it into Mary’s soft shirt and breathing in the smell of sandalwood and their laundry detergent. This is her favorite place to be in the world, tucked into Mary’s side like there’s no one else around. 
Her mind goes to Bea. Is that what she feels like when she’s with Ava? She hopes so. Everyone deserves to have this feeling at one point in their lives. For all of their life, if they’re lucky. 
“Think they’ll take our advice?” Mary asks quietly.
Shannon thinks about it. “In time. They’ll figure it out when they’re ready.”
“Lord help me, it better be before we graduate.” Mary shimmies down a little, catching the television remote with her foot and kicking it towards Shannon’s hand. “Because if they haven’t gotten it together by graduation night, I’m going to sic Lilith on them.”
Shannon laughs and presses the power button on the remote. “No you won’t.”
“No, I won’t,” Mary mumbles. “But I’ll want to.”
Shannon pats her knee gently. “I know, babe.”
Mary turns, presses her lips to the crown of Shannon’s head. “I love you.”
Something soft in Shannon’s chest melts even further. “I love you too.”
She feels Mary smile against her hair and then turn her attention back to the television. They’re done talking about feelings for the night and that’s okay. Mary will make her tea before bed and pull down her side of the comforter and leave the bathroom light on for her when she’s done brushing her teeth. And in the morning she’ll make Shannon breakfast even though she’s going to go eat with Ava, and she’ll say I love you a hundred different ways that aren’t those three little words.
Sometimes, that’s enough. But sometimes, Shannon likes to hear the way they sound coming out of Mary’s mouth. 
And she knows Ava will like the way they sound coming out of Bea’s mouth too. 
You can do it, Beatrice, she thinks to herself. Just be brave.
(more forever roomates)
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icewindandboringhorror · 7 days ago
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indeed my exact process once every 8 months or so
#I just thought today of a new way to format a 'profile' (like the descriptions of self that people use on friend meeting#apps and stuff) and how to organize the sections so that it seems such and such a way and oh what if there's links which click off#into branching paths so it's very acessible and there are two different forms depending on so on and so forth#and i was like 'um.. wow. amazing idea. this will be soooo aweseome and will definitely work' but then .. you know...self reflection#lol.. is this just like the millions of other iterations of a similar thing? No.. This Is Different ... Surely...#Though if I had a millionaire friend and a few people who do the type of coding you use for web design stuff and etc..#I could create the most elaborate detailed and amazing platonic friend seeking (and I guess you could also have 'dating' as an option#since that would draw in more of a crowd) website on the earth.. the new okcupid (back when okcupid didn't suckishly abandon their#whole format in hopes of trying to become just like tinder or whatever and they actually had like tons of info and percentages and#open answer questions and would list personality traits on a profile (like 'this person is more Open To New Expereinces than 65% of#other users' etc.). etc. etc. Oh what a beautiful thing I could craft for the detail freaks of the world.... Alas...#unfortunately we seem to be in an oversimplification era.. everything in short quick bites. everything on a tiny phone screen. etc.#marketing 'Introducing The Most Complicated Data Heavy Social Connection Site In The World' would not sell well I'd imagine gjhgjh#AANYWAY.. also no idea why the representation of me is in a turtle neck. what a bold fashion choice..#In another moment of self reflection.. the fact that in the first tag on this post I felt the need to define the word 'profile' just to be#specific as if people couldn't tell from context.. so clearly someone who finds filling out forms a 'fun afternoon activity' lol#the type of guy who finds psych evaluations and pop quizzes and making chore lists mostly enjoyable (< true)
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agenderduck · 1 month ago
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This is one of many posts I have planned on electricity. For this post specifically, I’m touching on the lack of autonomy the puppets have, and the unhealthy coping mechanisms and regression they fall into. If you listen closely, duck and red are talking about stain edwards, specifically how they had been used as a replacement for duck, in the background while yellow is preparing to climb the staircase. Considering the bigger boys actions later on in the episode, this feels more significant than just a joke or a piece of background dialogue (it probably is, just bear with me for the sake of over analysis). It’s a detail I don’t see brought up often, but an interesting one nonetheless. Not just because it’s funny, but because it serves as insight for what’s to come. This conversation is barely audible as yellow stares up into the black abyss above him. A divide between the trio is set up here, they are not on the same page. As yellow scales the staircase, base level red and duck fiddle with electricity. Theres a lack of care for the objects, or even living things around them showcasing that have that potential to do worse like the big and bigger boys. On a smaller scale, yes, but there’s a colder quality to the scene. Electracy warns them that what they’re doing is too much, but they are ignored. This ultimately leads to the power outage, spurred on by the two’s reckless over usage of electricity
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The limited use of technology, and by contrast overconsumption is intentional, as it showcases a real lack of freedom. The puppets are stuck in a cycle regardless of what they do. They desperately want to feel in control of something even if it’s trivial. When they’re not doing that, the trio find themselves waiting for things like having access to a computer once a year. It’s worth noting that Colin is an older model of computer, as is pretty much every other piece of technology in the house. Interestingly, the trio do actually own a laptop, which is a lot more modern in appearance. They are never seen doing anything with it however. The few things that do take on a more modern appearance are either unusable or serve as a distraction. So the choice of duck having a hand held device in the void feels significant. It’s almost like a reminder to the audience that in theory, knowledge is right outside of their grip but they will never have it. Everything they do is limited.
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The fridge scene is a rare moment where we see the puppets speak their genuine feelings, no strings attached. Not at all one sided or hollow. Duck and Red sit beside each other in the fridge scene knowing this is not something they’re allowed to have, but you can tell they want to scoot closer. They live in an unforgiving routine where the mere act of looking at each other feels like rebellion. They’re something more tangible and warm than their bigger counterparts, even if through skin made of cheap felt and faux fur. Compare this to the cold emptiness of the big and bigger boys and how duck and red seem to grow further apart despite always being paired together. Even if they’re sitting at a similar length in both rooms, the bigger boys seem to be magnetically pulled apart rather than together. The big boys sit side by side with their limbs tangled, in defiance maybe, but they don’t question their environment anymore and the walls have gotten smaller. The bigger boys live in a pseudo- futuristic prison. They have become the technology seen being fiddled with before. They play into each other’s antics, but lack any real emotion which greatly upsets yellow once he comes across them. He watches as they poke and prod at a suspiciously stain edwards shaped hunk of meat as their only source of entertainment, thinking that this is as good as it gets. Technology prodding at flesh. A parallel between Stain Edwards and the puppets can be drawn here.
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Stain Edwards, in their initial appearance clearly craves more in life, but their sole purpose is to be moldable, to be shaped into anything the hands that grasp them want them to be. The trio are the same way, though they don’t know it. They’re obviously not aware of their true situation, but each of them have their own level of awareness, albeit in different areas, but that’s a different post for a different time. Red and duck comply and mold to their environments out of fear, a fear of losing that false sense of control. So, the bigger boys become the perpetrators of violence. They let bitterness consume them until they’re unrecognizable. Their egos get the better of them, fully encompassing them and leaving nothing but mechanical empty husks behind. Red and Duck are tricked into believing they’re in control, when in reality they’ve dug themselves into an even deeper hole than before. They expect yellow to join them, as this is just the way things are, and this horrifies him. Here before him are creatures that sound vaguely like his friends but in a completely unrecognizable form. Ultimately, no matter what form they take on, yellow’s urge to search for answers will always scare them. Yellow’s batteries means change, and change means bad things will happen. No more false sense of control. Yellow literally has his awareness stolen from him time and time again through his batteries. Without them, not only can’t he properly articulate himself, but he also can’t remember what happened before.
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Yellow loves his friends, he knows that they’re flawed, and he can’t help but scale back down the staircase time and time again to help them. They’re all he has. He knows that they’re smart to an extent, but is that enough? Will they be able to handle it this time? I think he knows the answer to this already, though he desperately wants it not to be true. He knows that it’s not their fault that they get like this, but also maybe it is. Because truthfully the two like to let it get worse. Yellow sees the good in Duck and red and he wants them to do better, even if his efforts are in vain. Because the puppets do not have autonomy. He shreds the book because he can’t bear a reality where his friends don’t love him, but also because that’s where his strings are pulling him to begin with. He looks to duck as he does so knowing it will make him happy, as if to say he’s not wrong anymore. All he ever wants is to please him. Truthfully, that book had nothing that could truly help them , as such a thing doesn’t exist. Still there’s that small thought in the back of his mind that it could, and ultimately he chooses his friends over knowledge every time. It was never his choice to begin with. It was inevitably going to end this way, and a small part of yellow knows that, even if he can’t express it. The puppets are prisoners here, prisoners to another prisoner. She too participates in the same routines everyday, she too has strings that hold her back, but that’s a post for another day.
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miodiodavinci · 4 months ago
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im being so so brave but also i am gripping you by the shoulders and leaning in and letting you know i am so tired of being brave
#my job has invented new and even more agonizing ways to make itself stressful to endure#and that isn't even counting the fact that i've now seriously fucked up my wrist transporting 30lb boxes up and down stairs#or the fact that i occasionally get piercing shoulder pains if i'm not super careful about how i use the hand truck#or the fact that whenever i come home on mondays my entire lower body is so sore that i can't move beyond a weak shuffle#it's the fact that my boss has no sense of organization#so my supervisor and i are basically salvaging or starting from scratch every week#it's the fact that some of our clients are asking for things we're not even contracted to provide#like access to our company materials or additional resources outside of our scheduled bookings#and that there's this constant looming threat of 'ohhh don't be bad at your job!! or else we'll lose our contract with these people!!'#but 'bad at your job' in this case means 'not bending over backwards to accommodate the least accommodating circumstances possible'#like 'hey you need to lead this training exercise meant for 20 people except actually you only have 4 people'#'and actually none of them are familiar with the prerequisites for this training or have any experience with the skills'#'and also none of them want to be there and half of them just Don't Do These Things as a rule'#'and if you try to make them do anything they don't want to do (even if it's literally the point of the training) they Will leave'#'and then we will no longer have enough clients to pay you'#like. what am i doing. this company was not designed to work with this format. we're not an arts and crafts group or a club meeting#hi so i wrote this post before starting weekend work prep#it has been 3 hours now#im still not done#i haven't eaten and my wrist hurts so bad#i need to.................. take a break................................
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taffywabbit · 11 months ago
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i just woke up so i haven't actually watched the pokemon direct thingy yet, but i heard they mentioned they aren't pushing out another console release at all for 2024 and if that's true then frankly THAT news is way more hype than any actual game announcement could ever be. go girl let us wait!! this is genuinely what i've been begging for for years now
like, oh a new Legends game? that's neat i guess. oh wait it's being given literally ANY time to cook and they aren't crunching Game Freak to hell and back in order to pump out a bunch of half-baked annual releases for the first time in ages?? NOW we're fuckin talking. LOVE to see the torturous cycle broken
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johnbleepingzoidberg · 2 years ago
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UNTITLED EVIL LUIGI AU COMIC THING | Page 5 of (???)
the italian says “you’re a loser” i think. i googled common italian insults and that’s what it gave me. i wanted to go with something sharper but i don’t speak italian and i was a little worried about just slapping a harsh italian insult i found on google down and calling it a day without knowing the possible repercussions LOL
i feel like the coloring kinda got away from me on this one. oh well. also i meant to actually put pictures in the frames behind bowser in panel 5 but i forgot. double oh well
little jokes/references i tried to hide in here that may or may not be very legible:
mario’s new coffee cup says marty. because i love the idea of mario being the mushroom kingdoms savior for 20+ years and yet the toads still can’t get his name right at starbucks
the time on the alarm clock reads 10:05 and is a band reference :)
luigi’s doing some research on the paranormal and is reading a book called can you burn a luigi board? a guide to the paranormal because that video truly lives in my head rent free and it’s just. too perfect. because. come on. luigi. ghosts. etc. totally unrelated to the story just wanted to throw it in here Somewhere lmfao
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freshbeeth · 2 months ago
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i am splatoon’s bravest splatling propagandist 🫡
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carionto · 1 year ago
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Geronimo!
Space suits have come a long way - near 1 to 1 articulation and haptic feedback, intuitive zero-g booster based movement, nano-clamps for spiderman-like grip in low/no gravity, and of course dozens of micro layers of protection against all know space radiation and other hazards. Plus a centimeter thick composite armor against sentient threats, with a "cocoon" mode to fully cover all joints and other normally more exposed parts, that renders the Human inside near impervious to most small arms, and even some heavier impacts.
To fully test the limits of protection you don't actually need to have a person inside, just plenty of sensors and a good understanding Human physiology and anatomy. The military, of course, does things a bit differently, as their suits are even tougher. They do have this half-half mode where you are mostly armor, but can still move, but more like the Terminator. Given it also boasts a powered exoskeleton between the armor and hazardous protection layers, soldiers can wield weapons other militaries typically mount on vehicles, so the metaphor is almost just a straight factual comparison.
Some, however, are still not satisfied, and are always seeking to extend the durability of their suits to beyond the extremes.
____________________________
Hilda Lavre was standing on the edge of the ship in low orbit. One hand gripping an outer handle while engaged in final diagnostics.
"Alright, Hilda, everything looks green on our end, how 'bout you?"
"Same green green. I'm good."
"Whenever you're ready then. There's some clouds in the way of the predicted path, might slow you down a bit. Wanna wait?"
"Nah, nah. I'll wing it."
After a seconds pause, Hilda let go of the handle and gently kicked off the side of the ship. She was now on a direct collision course with the Atlantic Ocean.
.
.
.
(Thermals should start going up soon. I'm gonna turn on the external mic just a tad. There's just something about how the heat sounds scraping against the metal.
Oh, there it goes. Yellow, slowly getting to orange. Good.
Yea, that's a nice screech - burn that paint!
Halfway to red, altitude check. Already this close? Guess it'll be just shy of 80% tolerance.
Hehehehe, that means we can go for a bit faster next time. Cool.
Eh... wind without the heat just doesn't sound right, I'll turn it down to just barely audible. Something to keep me company.
Aaaand three.
Two.
One.)
SPLASH
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.
.
(It's dark. But I guess it was dark before...
before what though?
Well, that's okay.
This feels like a new kind of dark though.
There's the dark when you're alone in your room at night, all the lights are out.
Another kind is when you decide to get inside your brothers closet to scare him when he comes back from the kitchen. That's a fun kind of dark. (it's getting cold)
There's also the dark of being in an underground bunker during a storm. Then the power gets cut and all the exits are sealed. That's a... lonely kind of dark.
One time I was wandering the woods, and before I knew it, it was the middle of a moonless night, overcast too. Hiding out in an abandoned shed, without even the wind or animal sounds to let you know anything is out there. I didn't like that kind of dark at all. (It's really cold)
This dark though... I dunno. It's like I'm hiding out in my own closet. My shoulder is up against my winter jacket, feet are grazing those old sandals I swore to throw out two summers ago. But also, it's not my room. Or even my house. Why am I in my closet? How did it get here? Where even is here?
I feel sleepy.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
"Hey, hey! Hilda! Wake up!"
*grunting* "Ugh... shut, shut up Barry..."
"Gods, don't freak us out like that. You okay?"
"Depends. How high did it go go?"
*laughter* "Okay, [She's fine everyone] yeah, you're fine. 87 meters, new record."
"Hmm, I was aiming to to break 90."
"Well, those clouds nudged you a little off, you hit it at a 83 degree angle. Still, those other readings are nice. I'm pretty sure we can do a boosted fall next time."
"Yeah, I I think so too. I feel a little little cold, did something break on hit hit?"
"Not break, but the impact did jolt the subsystems a bit. Activated one of the sedative shots. I manually made your suit give you a wake up shot right as I noticed. You should be feeling the effects right about now."
"Mmhhmmm, oh yea. I'm feeling the kick kick now. We need to improve the kinetic tic dampeners. No good if if it puts you to sleep upon any hard enough nough impact."
"Yup. We're suspending any other jumps for the week until we get that fixed and implement some minor tweaks based on your jump once we analyze the telemetry further.
Okay, everyone! Good job today! Let's meet up next weekend and test these bad boys out. Let's aim for a 100 meter splash by the end of the year!"
*cheers and yeahs as Barry opens a mini fridge and everyone cracks open a cold one*
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eldritch-spouse · 1 year ago
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What happened with original Icons? You know, Asmodues, Mammoth, Satan, etc. Where are they? Are they dead? Are they ancestors of modern Icons?
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(Your aimless questions attract the attention of a humble historian, who, maybe out of pity, or perhaps out of loneliness, sits beside you. His posture is mildly concerning.)
" I can tell from the names alone you're the Christian type, right? You must be. "
(He nods to himself.)
" Do me a huge favor. It grates on my nerves having to listen to these fables getting perpetuated for endless centuries -Even my old man wouldn't shut the fuck up about it, may Dorem be kind to him- Forget everything you heard about the sins and the originals. "
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" It's all wrong. All of it. You wouldn't believe me if I told you how bastardized the history of this planet and its annexes has been. By your kind specifically. You erased history! It's miserable! You've been living your little lies for a shameful eternity... I guess I understand why. "
(There's a huff.)
" You couldn't even get their names right... "
" Of course they're dead! Do you even know the rulers of today's Perdition? Dead and burned to a crisp, their ashes too probably bathe the grounds of the Rings modern demons walk upon -Oh, the Fragmentation Wars were something truly spectacular- I wish I had been there myself sometimes. "
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" Listen kid. Even we have difficulty putting it all back together, thanks to all this damage being constantly spread. I know demons who are more disconnected with their past than you- At least you know there's Icons out there! I've met some fucking skid marks that think 'Satan' is still bumbling around... "
" I'll tell you right now, three of 'em got nothing to do with the originals. Vorticia, Livius and Kalymir. "
(He tuns to face you better.)
" You know how Wrath is, right? Any nut can just have a go at the King, and if they win, they rule. Kalymir doesn't have a single royal bone to him. And that fucker's got a lot of bones... "
" Vorticia is an impeccable Queen, if you ask me. She's better than whatever the fresh fuck Gluttony could have got stuck with, but we're mostly positive she comes from adjacent families. Close to the court, y'know? "
" And Livius... It's a bit hard to tell with all the massacres in Envy's royal lineage, though you can probably safely bet that he was a cousin of the last prince. An ambitious cousin, eh? They say 'keep your friends close but your enemies closer'- I don't think it worked out that well for him. Keep Livius ten feet away from you at all times, those hands reach far. "
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" Don't worry about any of that though. If you ask me, us history enthusiasts are going to have some bright days ahead, now that there's two whole highers settled on the surface. "
(A tail can be heard swatting beneath long, weathered robes.)
" Two of them, you hear me? You and I? We're going to bare witness to a new age! Aren't you excited?! "
" We're talking about THE Goddess Miara and the Plaguemaster -You don't even know who those are, you poor idiot, it's not your fault- And I just know they're in contact. I know it! "
(The demonoid coughs, scratchy voice cracking.)
" Anyway. We should talk more sometime. "
(You get the feeling he wants company really bad.)
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voiceofthe · 16 days ago
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much as i like how none of the voices have proper names or even really titles acknowledged and just refer to each other with vague descriptors and much as i would like to keep them all in the same body it turns out these both make writing interactions significantly harder
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fictionadventurer · 6 months ago
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My desire to support a Biblical sitcom done in a respectful way vs. my hatred of the mockumentary style, FIGHT!
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