#truly just don't know what to do or how to proceed with my life anymore. i'm so trapped by everything and there's no hope or way out

[selfinflictedgunshotwound]

won’t call what i’m doing “relapsing” bc that feels incredibly disingenuous but i am definitely backsliding again <3 why do i always wanna force myself back somewhere i don’t fit anymore. there’s nothing else for me there, nothing to accomplish by waiting or feeling this way, and yet.

[merakiui]

Mera Mera Mera! Thoughts on twst boys if you tell them "no more sex" after an argument. Pretty please! 🥺🙏 💙 (You characterize them so well, I'm certain you can bless us with knowledge)

>:D I may have a few thoughts on the reactions!!! I shall bless you with said thoughts (i.e. twst cast being petty and silly).

Riddle - he's perfectly silent when he tears out the page in his life planner titled "dick appointments" and rips it in half in front of you. "Would you look at that? It appears my schedule's become open." He proceeds to fill the time slots with academics and club activities. Your "no more sex" rule goes both ways, but if you find yourself unable to bear it he might consider penciling you into his schedule. ...if it ever frees up, that is. :)

Trey - "Yeaaah, I had that coming," he admits with a sheepish chuckle. Trey very rarely argues with you. Ever. So maybe it was one-sided, but he still goes along with it to keep you happy and to end the argument as quickly as possible. He'll smooth things over by baking you your favorite sweet. He can be patient and wait if you're still stubbornly insisting on no more sex, but that doesn't mean he won't tease you often.

Cater - "Cowabummer." Yes, that's all he says. Yes, he gives you the sad thumbs-down and everything. Cater cannot be /srs for this one because if he's /srs you'll see the /srs sides of him that he'd rather hide behind a /j personality. (He later makes it up to you by apologizing and taking you into town to your favorite places. <3 you end up fucking in the changing stall in one of the clothing stores hehe.)

Ace - he rolls his eyes and laughs. "I never even wanted to fuck you anyways. You're, like, super mid." (He's lying. Please don't ban him from having sex with you. </3 This is how he's apologizing later.

Deuce - he's genuinely devastated. Nooo, what do you mean "no more sex"? D: that's not even the worst of it, though. Deuce is just sad that the both of you argued and that he said some things he's not very proud of. He was really mean and so were you. What were you even arguing about in the first place? Deuce's heart aches knowing you're so upset at him, so he does everything he can to make it up to you. It's fine if you don't want sex anymore; he just wants you to be happy.

Leona - he highly doubts you're serious. "Sure, okay. We'll see about that one," he tells you with a lazy half-smirk. "Good luck with that, herbivore." (he's so hot when you wake up next to him in the mornings and he has that rough morning voice...... you end up fucking the following day, too weak to his charms to keep up with your no sex promise. Leona teases you for that.)

Ruggie - "I'll live," he says with a shrug. Sure, it sucks that you no longer want to fuck and it also sucks that the two of you even argued in the first place, but he'll live. You and Ruggie are distant for all of one day before coming back together to sincerely apologize. He's a little awkward with his apology, but it does indeed come from the heart. Perhaps there's some makeup sex that follows...

Jack - another one who is more upset over the actual argument than your admission of no more sex. Jack feels so bad. :( his ears are flattened on his head and his tail is drooped; he's just so sad that he argued with you and made you angry. He was out of line and shouldn't have let his emotions get the best of him. If no more sex is what you truly want, he'll abide by that.

Azul - "Angelfish, I understand you're upset, but do you truly mean that?" You do, and you storm out of his VIP room and ghost him for the rest of the day. Azul goes through the five stages of grief within the span of a few hours. T_T he's a wreck, not only because you said no more sex but because you argued and you're angry with him and you probably hate him now and what if you break up and you never want to see him again and and and and and !!!!!!!! Sad tako hours.

Jade - he smiles patiently. "If you say so." (his compliance is too obedient; don't let him fool you. He's going to spike your drink with an aphrodisiac and then when you come to him begging for release he'll deny you in the same way you denied him.)

Floyd - "Shrimpy, c'mon, ya can't be serious." You turn away from him with a huff, arms folded over your chest. "S'not funny, Shrimpy..." He pouts at you, brows knitted in annoyance. You look him dead in the eyes and snap back with, "Good. Cuz I'm not joking, Floyd." (Floyd's in a foul mood for the rest of the day; no one dares go near him. His aura is too threatening...)

Kalim - if it's your first argument with him, he's genuinely compelled to throw a party celebrating it LOL. Kalim means well with it, too, which makes it arguably worse. ^^;;; but he is indeed very sad that things got to this point and that you were so angry with him that you even said no more sex! He sulks sadly. :( will a parade make you feel better? Or do you want more renovations done to Ramshackle? Do you want gemstones? Just tell him how he can make it up to you and he'll do it! He's so very sorry! >_<

Jamil - he rolls his eyes, shooting you an unamused look. "Very mature of you, (Name)." Jamil isn't going to entertain the argument anymore. If you want to talk things over, you can do that after you and he have cooled off. Although if he's truly intent on getting your forgiveness and nullifying your no sex rule right away, a little hypnosis might do the trick...

Vil - he gives you a critical look. "What does sex have anything to do with this?" If you're going to argue with Vil, argue about the subject matter and don't bring unrelated topics into it! >:( arguments with Vil always make you feel so bad because essentially he tells you to do better and think about your conduct. Of course he also reflects on how he acted and what even led up to the argument in the first place. Even his apology, though heartfelt and authentic, is so perfect.

Rook - "Mon amour, lovely trickster whom I adore most, oh, how you wound me!" He's so dramatic about it, but then he also wholeheartedly means it when he says and acts like that. "Shall we share a kiss of forgiveness and allow water to flow freely under the bridge once more?" He is truly sorry, but then he's sneaky when he's slipping his tongue into your mouth as if he's trying to drag your apology out of your throat and taste it in his mouth.

Epel - "Consarn it!" He's huffy, glaring at you with his cheeks puffed out. "If yer gonna throw a hissy fit and say no more in-out, in-out, then don't come crawlin' to me when yer feelin' it!" Of course he then storms off and is promptly scolded by Vil for such atrocious behavior. Epel realizes he was wrong for getting so worked up and he'll later apologize to you. You apologize as well, but for the rest of the week there will be no more sex. Epel thinks that's fair. He sort of deserved that one. T_T

Idia - "Wutever. I don't need 3D to be happy." He rolls his eyes and the argument ends there. (Idia later spends an entire week locked away in his room building a (Name) sex doll to make up for the lack of your touch.)

Malleus - poor Hornton... :( he sulks in the darkness of his room and no one knows the reason for why he's so upset. Sebek is distraught; whoever dared to put waka-sama in this sad mood will pay!!!!!! Telling Malleus no more sex makes him think you don't want him anymore and that you essentially are breaking up (which is not the case). Diasomnia feels the gloomy atmosphere for days to come. It's Lilia who finally manages to convince Malleus to come out of his room and go to you for a chat to resolve things.

Lilia - "Oh dear. That's rather unfortunate." Even though he says this, he doesn't seem very affected or surprised or even remotely upset. But then Lilia's been through countless arguments, some far more severe than the one he just had with you, so he knows how to navigate these sorts of things. He's very mature about it and respects your no more sex rule. In fact, he's going to keep track of how many days you go with no sex before you inevitably forgo this rule for sloppy, heartfelt makeup sex with him, which he'll gladly indulge in.

Silver - it's probably impossible to argue with Silver. He's just so sweet. How could you ever get into any sort of argument with him? But if you did find yourself at a disagreement, he'd do whatever he could to resolve it and make you feel better. If no more sex is what makes you happy, then there will be no more sex.

Sebek - "SO BE IT, HUMAN. I DO NOT REQUIRE YOUR TOUCH OR INTIMACY TO SURVIVE, NOR DO I WANT IT." He's so LOUD. The entire hall ends up learning more than they'd ever want to about your and Sebek's argument. ;;;; he rants about you and your audacity to Silver (who's half-asleep), and so it's obvious he's affected. Sebek refuses to apologize because he's stubborn, but he realizes he misses you quite a lot. :( no one point that out, though, or else he'll yell at them that that's not true whatsoever!!!!

[thelonelysoulhome]

Doumeki is the first person ever to reach out his hand to Yashiro:

Part 4 (part 2)

(this time it's really the last part lol)

(Reminder to read the other parts before this one, if it's not already done, thank you)

(TW: suicide)

To go on, living a worn out life

Yashiro is done, so done with this shitty life, give him a break, the poor man is exhausted, living a life that never been his.

Would that be the answer to ALL of this suffering ? Wouldn't death put out this fire that been lighted inside of him since his childhood ? And that he never been able to put out, how could he do it alone, all alone. Letting it consume him till this very day.

(After he been shot, Y talks with kage in the hospital in chapter 10.5)

"Dont they say 'My whole life flashed before my eyes?' in my case, not a single good thing popped up though"

(He is awareee💔)

"But there have been some good things, you know? One or two... Or three" And Bam! D pop up in Y's mind, because D is one of the few or even the only good thing that happened to Y.

He comes in his life without warning and give him so much in such a short period of time, dismanteling so many hard belief he have, but it's too much for him, he doesn't have the time to proceed any of it, he just got out of the hospital that he already is in danger of death, again. And he knows it, he rushes straight into it.. Into his death, his only escape ?

Yashiro is tired, so tired of this worn out life, he is so over any kind of hope, he don't believe in himself and there are very few things you can do for someone that threw themself first.

Let me... Let me put an end to it..I'm tired, I'm tired of thinking, I'm tired of living, Ah.. I never lived, I just always survived, it's enough... Let me rest.

And that when Doumeki appear again:

Even if he been shot by Y just a few hours ago, sensing the danger Yashiro is in, he runs towards his side, he don't let go, he don't let him, he doesn't let Yashiro's hand fall, he tries desperatly to reach it again.

It is precisely because he is at the bottom of the abyss that he must reach out to him, he needs even more help. Even if this one person pushes him away, now that he knows, he can't ignore what's inside him anymore.

He don't want to let him face it all alone, not anymore.

If Yashiro doesn't have enough straight to fight anymore, Doumeki wants to fight for him, if Yashiro is not attached to his life anymore, Doumeki would be attached to it instead, until he finds a taste for life again.

He want's to also carry the burden, even if it only gives him a tiny bit of relief, he want's Yashiro to rely on him, and to share the burden of all those years with him.

Yes, Doumeki saved you my dear ❤‍🩹

Indeed without Doumeki, Yashiro would be dead.

He searched for him and he saved him from a death that would end a life he did not really live.

Doumeki saved Yashiro's life but not only that, he also saved him from the coldness of being ignored.

Even if it's really hard for Y, and that he is not ready for it yet, maybe not even realising yet, that he always deeply, truly, wanted someone to notice, someone to see, to see him, the litlle boy, stuck in the dark of this closet.

Even near of his one death, all of Doumeki's thoughs are going toward Yashiro (in the cd drama we can clearly hear him pant a "kashira.." out).

He is so devouted, so persistent cause he knows, he saw Yashiro for who he is, and he love him unconditionally. Those fragmants of the real Yashiro are enough for him to want to stay.

He is ready to do anything for him.

He is ready to overcome everything for Yashiro.

But it's without counting that, Yashiro is not ready.. Not ready to accept all of this.

(Seing Doumeki's face here fucking hurt..)

It's only here that he perceive a glimpse of Yashiro's trauma, cause even if D sees Y for who he is, he in reality have very few index and understanding of the causes and how far and deep Y's suffering goes.

And he at this moment realise that even with all the best intentions in the world, certain things can't be resolved.

We don't really know what conclusions D does of all of this, but there is one that I am sure that he did:

Doumeki understand that even though all he want is to love him

That will only hurt Yashiro.

He "give up's", he makes up his mind the moment he understand that he is shatering Yashiro, and that sadly, without Y's will he can't do anything about it.

He is at a dead end, and he quickly understands that he is obligated to make a very difficult decision.

(OMG that hurt so baad...cryinggg❤‍🩹)

The two of them have taken all their courage to let each other go.

Yashiro let go Doumeki, his only light, the only hope he ever had, to protect Doumeki (and himself) from further harm, the yakuza world is indeed dangerous and Y don't want D to be in any danger, especially not because of him. D still have his family: his mom, his sister Aoi, he still have a home, Yashiro doesn't have to be part of it.

(To know that he is the one that called D's family when he was in the hospital..💔)

Seing Yashiro make (what he think to be) his last goodby to what could be his only light in the darkness is trully heart wrenching.

This encounter with Doumeki make such a big impact, and changements in Yashiro's life in such a small amount of time (2 or 3 monts at most) I believe they needed to pass trough all of that, it's being part of their journey, to let's hope, someday become each other support.

In the end of the day, they are only, unfairly, deeply, wounded human beings, with qualities and flaws, and we can already be thankfull that their path crossed.

They both need to work on themself so they can after try to find each other.

The path is still long, but I believe in them, I believe that there is still hope, that someday, they'll help each other to heal, to live.

End.

Thank you very much for reading ❤ See you soon.

[nicoline1998enilocin]

I loooooove cats, so my request is for tony and fem reader, they live together (just dating, engaged or married, you decide) and reader is dropping hints that she wants a baby cat and tony pretends that he's not listening, one day he arrive home with a cute baby ginger cat with beautiful green eyes and she's so so so so so happy. She named him tony jr. (of course tony loved the name) and lots of cuddles with tony and their new baby cat please ❤️🐈

Making a new friend

PAIRING | Husband!Tony Stark x Wife!Avenger!Female!Reader

WORD COUNT | 1.5K

SUMMARY | You've been dropping hints about adding a little feline friend to your family for a long time, but when it seems Tony doesn't pick up on your hints, you drop the subject altogether. That is until he suddenly shows up with a little ginger cat, just like the one you have told him about all this time.

WARNING(S) | This is your official trigger warning. Do not proceed if any of these topics upset you. Tony seemingly can't take a hint, tooth-rottingly sweet fluff at the end, implied smut (implied oral F&M receiving), light swearing.

A/N | When I read your request I couldn't stop thinking about puss in boots, so that's exactly what I envisioned the little fella to look like! I hope you enjoy this tooth rotting amount of fluff! 🖤

Likes, comments and reblogs will be very much appreciated 🩷

Divider is made by @firefly-graphics | 18+ banner is made by yours truly

You, Tony, and all the other Avengers are holding a little afterparty after one of his parties, and you're situated in Tony's lap. ''You know what I think would make our life even better? A ginger cat! They're so adorable and-'' is all you can say before Tony captures your lips with his.

He has heard you talk about that very same cat a million times by now, and he has definitely gotten the hint, but he's just waiting for the right time to surprise you with one.

''Hey!'' you say as you playfully slap his chest because he cut you off mid-sentence.

''What? Am I not allowed to kiss my beautiful wife anymore?'' he says, with a slight offense in his tone.

''Well... you can..., but it's not nice to cut me off mid-sentence,'' you say with a slight pout.

''I'm sorry, Pumpkin, I'll make sure it won't happen again,'' he tells you, and he seals his promise with another kiss which makes you melt into his embrace.

When you pull back, you turn to face Bucky, looking at him with a deadly serious face. ''Bucky? Can I please cuddle with Alpine? Because Tony won't give me a cat - which I think is very unfair!'' you say with a glare as you turn back to Tony.

''Alright, doll. I'll just get her real quick, so please stay where you are so you can cuddle her,'' he says before getting up with a huge smile.

''See? Bucky will let me cuddle with Alpine. But I still don't understand why I can't have my cat, and he does. You're married to me, not him!'' you tell Tony, who is trying his hardest not to laugh.

''For starters, he tried to kill me, and you haven't yet, so that's a good reason I didn't marry him. And secondly, I fell in love with you, Pumpkin, so, of course, I'm married to you,'' he tells you, and you calm a little at those words.

''Okay-'' is all you say before you hear the signature purr of little Miss Alpine.

''Alpine!'' you say, and you jump up, forgetting all about Tony's words.

You take the white fur ball from Bucky's arms and immediately snuggle your face into her. ''Hello, little one; I missed you so much!''

''You should really get her-''

''Shut it, Wilson. Don't give her any more ideas,'' Tony snaps, but you're too busy to notice it, all your attention going to Alpine right now. And if that wasn't enough, you're too drunk to remember this conversation the next day, regardless.

''Good morning, sleepy head,'' Tony whispers in your ear, and you groan.

''How much did I have to drink last night?'' you ask, remembering nothing from the party.

''Enough to be funny, but not enough to be completely blacked out,'' he says as he helps you sit up, the room around you still dark. He hands you a water bottle and some aspirin to help with your pounding headache.

''Please don't tell me I did something embarrassing...'' you sigh before taking it and chugging almost the entire bottle.

''No, you just cuddled with Alpine, is all,'' he says with an adoring smile.

''Oh, speaking of her, when are you finally getting me a cat? I really want one, and I don't think it's fair you let Bucky have her, but I, your actual wife, who you promised to love forever and always, can't have one. Unfair,'' you say as you cross your arms with a slight pout.

''If you don't stop that right now, you will never get one. I had half a mind to get you one soon, but now you're not getting one,'' Tony says.

''You were getting me a cat?!'' you say, and your hangover is completely forgotten as you look at Tony.

''Not anymore,'' he shrugs and gets up from the bed, but you quickly grab his hand, not seeing the smile forming on Tony's lips.

''I'm so sorry; I didn't mean it like that. It's just that I've wanted one for so long...'' you sigh, softly holding his hands as tears form in your eyes.

''How about this, we just pause this conversation for now, and if you're a good girl for me, I will get you something else you really want? And no, not a cat. I'm not ready for that kind of commitment,'' Tony quickly adds.

''Okay, but only if you shower with me and let me suck you off this time. You went down on me last time, so now it's my turn again,'' you say with a glint of mischief in your eyes.

''Deal!'' he says, picking you up and running to the shower with you in his arms as you shriek.

A few months passed, and here you are, still without a cat and still sad about it.

You're in the living room with your book, and Bucky walks in with Alpine in his arms, but when he sees you sitting there, he knows you could use some kitty cuddles.

''I just don't think it's fair...'' you sigh as you scratch Alpine between her ears. She decided that your lap was the perfect place to nap, and you weren't one to complain.

''Maybe Tony just wants to surprise you, doll. Wouldn't be the first time he goes all out for you,'' he says as a reminder of your wedding.

''You're right. But thank you for letting me cuddle with Alpine for now; I'm glad she loves me as much as she does,'' you say with a small smile as she purrs at you.

''No problem, doll. I'm just glad someone finally took the little shit off my hands; she's been keeping me awake all night,'' Bucky sighs.

''Honestly, I need to drop it and accept that I just have to cuddle with him and Miss Alpine over here,'' you say, knowing that letting it go is the best option right now.

But Bucky is right because Tony is planning a surprise, and it just so happens that your birthday is right around the corner, too.

The morning of your birthday is here, and you got woken up in the perfect way by Tony.

His first birthday present would be a couple of orgasms, and he couldn't wait to start. He crawls under the comforter, and it's a good thing you have a habit of sleeping naked.

He woke you up by eating you out first thing in the morning, and you jolt awake with a gasp as you feel his teeth nibbling between your legs, his tongue teasing you before you cum all over his face.

''S-shit, Tony! Yes!'' you scream out as the orgasm washes over you.

When he's done, he crawls back up for a deep kiss.

''Happy birthday, Pumpkin,'' he says with his deep morning voice, and you immediately melt into his embrace.

''Thank you so much, Babe,'' and you let yourself melt into his arms, the two of you cuddling for a little while before your stomach protests and rumbles loudly.

''Time for breakfast!'' he says, picking you up, and he walks out of the bedroom.

''Tony, no! Let me put on some clothes first!'' you say, and you wiggle out of his grasp.

You run back into the bedroom, where you pick out some lacy panties and one of Tony's shirts which is way too big for you, but they're very comfortable.

When you're changed, you walk towards the kitchen with a bit of extra sway in your hips as Tony follows you, practically salivating at the sight.

''Jesus, Pumpkin, you're going to be the death of me,'' he says in your ear as he pulls you closer.

You keep walking with Tony plastered to your back, and when you walk past the living room, you see a lot of decorations, presents, and, of course, all of the Avengers standing there.

''HAPPY BIRTHDAY!'' They all say in unison, and you don't notice Tony walking away to get your present.

Everyone gives you a big hug and extra birthday wishes before you turn around, finally noticing Tony is gone.

''Wait, where is-'' but before you can finish your sentence, you see Tony with the cutest little thing you have ever seen in his arms.

''Happy birthday, Pumpkin,'' he says softly as he walks over to you with a small orange cat in his hands, big green eyes looking up at you as he tries to meow.

''Please tell me I can keep him?'' you say as tears well up in your eyes. This is by far the best birthday you've ever had.

''He's all yours, Pumpkin. So, what will his name be?'' Tony asks.

''Tony Jr., of course!'' you tell him, and everyone laughs at the name.

''Perfect!'' is all he says before he softly kisses you, and you take the cat from his arms.

The rest of the day is spent with Tony Jr. on the couch as you slowly get to know each other, and you've fallen head over heels for the little fur ball.

''Happy birthday to me,'' you whisper, and the smile on your face isn't moving anywhere for the foreseeable future.

[inkly-heart]

So...,

inkly, I just found out something bizarre and it became an accidental sleuthin' on my part. Because of that, I have, A LOT of questions playing in my mind more than ever. I still haven't gone through all of the content but this is what I got so far

P.S (I'm sorry if I ask too much, please do not be intimidated by the number of questions I'm gonna send soon, you can ignore them or take your time to answer them. I'm doing this in case I forgot, so please tell me to stop if you are overwhelmed. I'll be out of your hair after I asked all of them if you let me.)

Now,

Since I found you around the year of 2022, I'm pretty sure you have oodles of OC content before 2022 (veteran 2020/2021 followers can vouch me for that) that has been lost in time.

BUT

I accidentally found some and here is my first finding :

Damon and Venni are housemates/roommates

Damon has a crush on/likes Venni.

Venni likes/loves Angel

Venni has experience dating with Angel once

Venni and Angel broke up because Angel doesn't like to be in a relationship.

Venni is heartbroken.

Venni knows that Damon likes him but he 'rejected' Damon.

Hence, why DG dislike Venni.

Then Venni is introduced to Catherine (somehow)

Angel (doesn't like?) Catherine.

My first question is :

If your answer is yes, then I proceed to my next question :

Since all of these characters belonged to Br<3ken Colors, does all of this information takes place in the game as well?

If yes,

How does it play and when did it happened in the timeline of the Br<3ken Colors game? Does it happened a few months before the game takes place? Or maybe a year before the MC is introduced in the picture?

My third (or maybe fourth) question is :

Does Damon still like Venni during the time in Br<3ken Colors game? Does he still like Venni after he met and fell in love with MC?

My fourth (or fifth) question is :

Does Damon still lives with Venni in the game? If so, why did he stayed? Does he resent Venni in some way?

My last question is :

How come DG doesn't kill Venni? Or if he did, how many times did he attempt to kill Venni?

If your answer to the first question is NO, please ignore all the other questions.

Thank you.

Yours truly,

Sleuthin' Red Blob

The things what happened between these guys I have decided to change it because I didn't like the "story" anymore between them long time now.

To keep the answer more simple and focus more on the new story I won't explain their old past since it's erased.🤔

Their new past-

-Angel and Venni became friends when they were still at school but one day Angel's parent's decided that Angel will be home schooled so they got separated and since her parents are very strict she couldn't really keep contact with Venni. Angel's parents are very picky who they talk with (if you're not rich/popular you're not worth it) so they wanted to make sure she won't hang out or talk with other Hueväri who they don't like.

But when Angel moved away and got more "control" of her own life she bumped into Venni one day where they then started to hang out again. (Angel's parents are still keeping contact to her, still causing her stress. They don't know all the things what she does nowadays)

-On Damon's part. He had crush on Angel but since she is very popular he never really got a chance to get close to her and tell her about his feelings so when the times passed he slowly began to lose the hope that he could ever be her boyfriend what eventually end up to giving up and moving on with his life. It was tough for him but it hurt even more not being able to reach to her. (not to mention he doesn't like being constantly jealous. Which happens a lot when he had to watch others fawning over Angel.)

(This also happened before Angel met Venni again so Damon didn't know about him. So DG doesn't have negative feelings towards Venni anymore either.)

[redcherryrain]

Okay. Lets start again from the beginning shall we?

For those of you who don't know me, I'm Red Cherry Rain, but you all can call me Cherry for short. I am the host of a traumagenic D.I.D. system that goes by the name of The Nightmare District. When I first created this tumblr it was out of retaliation to the Endo community on here. Some of the things said on this tumblr have been out of pocket and wrong of me to do and I do truly apologize to all the people I have hurt by my past posts. These posts weren't just sharing my views on the endo community but more attacking them for their beliefs. My own belief does still stand. But that being said, I will not continue to attack the endogenic community on this platform or any other platforms that I run. I am allowed to have my own rights and views on the endogenic topic but so can everyone else. Hence from here on out I will look at what endos send to me, but that being said I will share my own personal views on what is shared. For anyone who comes to me, I will share my opinion, but I will not try to force that opinion on anyone else. This is me agreeing to disagree on your views. Now what does this mean for future posts. For any post regarding Dissociative Identity Disorder I will continue to use plural tags on the platform, I will not use these tags to share hate, but to share my own life experiences with D.I.D. and how I live as a system. Hate is not a good thing to spread and can instead cause discourse among everyone on the platform, no matter which side you are on. I ask that the people doing so refrain from doing it anymore. If you do not like or agree with what I am posting you may leave your opinions, I will indeed read them. But with that, I will not change my style just to cater to one person. If you truly do just fully despise my content you may block me and move on with your life, I will not hold a grudge against you for it. Everyone's style in content creation is different, my community will find me and grow because of the people who enjoy my work. I will no longer kekw at endos, but much rather I will share my opinion and walk away. This page is not endo safe, but I will also not personally hunt you down, I will mention though that the majority of people in my discord though do share the same view on you as I do, proceed with caution. We will not attack you, but we may politely ask you to leave.

In regards to AspenFrostEN: I no longer wish to correspond with Aspen, I do wish to coexist peacefully with Aspen and the Entourage System. I personally do not agree with the route that Aspen has taken with her community and her content. I do not hate her, I am more disappointed with the way she is making systems look on every platform. For someone who promotes and stands for healing, she does not make it easy for anyone. As mentioned before, Aspen if you do happen to read this, you do have my discord and I do not mind speaking with you privately. But this does not give you any right to attack me and the rest of The Nightmare District, you have indeed indirectly done this twice on your tiktok page and we do not appreciate it. I have been asked and I will say it here, you may apologize and I will forgive you, but you have a lot to do to earn back my trust, especially with what you have done. My discord server is open to all who have dealt with Aspen and would like to share their story, open a ticket and my staff team will indeed get to you All in all I truly am sorry for everything I have done and this is my time to change, I do not expect to be forgiven, and I understand that for some that will be difficult to do, but I promise you all I am trying to change for the better. If anyone of you would indeed like to speak to me privately I do ask that you join my discord and open a ticket where I will gladly be of service to anyone who would like to speak to me privately. Thank you all for giving me a chance to explain. Below I will link my server for those who need it! Thank you.

[howhow326]

Nino salt prompt: What if Rocketear had consequences

Basically, everything that happens in Rocketear happens the exact same way (Nino assuming the worst of Alya, Nino assuming Chat Noir is Ariana Grande, Nino breaking Ladybug's AND Alya's trust at the same time by revealing his/Alya's identity to Adrien, Nino slut shaming Adrien to his face on accident) except the very end of the episode, where Alya tells Nino she is now Rena Furtive.

Instead, Alya tries to reassure Nino that she will always love him no matter what, while lightly asking him "hey, you followed me to my house without permission and took a video of me without my knowledge, wtf?!"

Nino then proceeds to show his ass like usual ("I needed to protect you from that homewreaker!" "I'm your boyfriend so it's perfectly okay for me to stalk you!!").

Alya really dosen't like this side of Nino, so she asks if their relationship can go on break for a bit (and Nino tries to manipulate her more with his "you don't love me!!!" Shtick)

The next day at school, Adrien pulls Alya aside and jokingly asks her "hey, are you Rena Rouge haha lol".

Alya is horrified.

Adrien then gives Alya the full story: Nino wanted to convince Adrien that Chat Nior had seduced Alya and revealed their identities as proof that Alya was only now kerping secrets. Adrien wanted to forget he heard anything, but he decided to ask Alya anyway because he knew what Nino had done wasn't right.

Alya is now infuriated. She can't believe Nino had the gall to be upset about her secrets only for him to go behind her back and violate her privacy this way. Especially since what Nino just did puts his identity at risk!

Alya thanks Adrien for being honest with her. After school, she marches straight to Marinette's house and tells her everything. Alya thought her best friend would be even angrier than she had been.

Marinette is heartbroken when she hears the scoop. How could someone she trusts do that, especially after what happened with Chloe. Marinette decides that Nino news a new secret identity since Carapace has been compromised, but Alya orders her to cut him loose. Nino can't be trusted.

When Ladybug pulls Nino aside and tells him he can't be Carapace anymore because he revealed his identity, the only thing he feels is surpise. The boy really didn't think this was a possibility.

The realization eventually sets in and he gets akumatized. He becomes Shell Shocker and goes after Adrien for "ruining his relationships!" Adrien tries to encourage Nino to give up the akuma, but then Nino reveals he willingly accepted Hawkmoths deal... this is who he really is.

Ladybug, whith some assistance from Rena Furtive, takes him down. Nino tries to play it off, "oh uh, i was akumatized??? Thanks for saving me Ladybug!" But Adrien shuts him down right quick, "He's lying! He willingly accepted the akuma just to get back at his girlfriend!" Adrien calling him out like that takes Nino by surpise, but it's the least of his worries.

Alya secretly recorded the whole fight and posted it onto the Ladyblog. Everybody in Paris now knows who Nino truly is. All of his friendships are destroyed; Marinette and Adrien cut him off for good; and Alya finnaly dumps him. His family decides to leave Paris for his own good.

At the airport, Nino has a chance encounter with Chloe. "Well well well, if it isn't the loser who got exposed for working with Hawkmoth! Even when I did that fashion victim a favor, I made sure that nobody in Paris could see I made a deal with him. You're ridiculous, Lahiffe, utterly ridiculous!"

"Sh-shut up Chloe!" Nino stutters out.

"Waaa, shut up! God, even your insults are basic, bitch. Well, before you go, I have a new scoop for you Nino... News flash! Alya dosen't love you anymore, and it's all your fault!!! It's hilarious, utterly hilarious!"

When Nino finnaly gets to his new bedroom, he cries himself to sleep realizing that he ruined his own life because didn't think there would be consequences...

Edit: optional shipping: Nino x Lila, Alya x Marinette, Alya x Adrien, Marinette x Alya x Adrien

[aettuddae]

Hi :) It's the crazy plant idea lady who called Serim a twink that waters dead plants again. Sorry about this response being kind of wack. I had to tend to my Sue Sylvester fan page account. (It's a long story for another time). OKAY TO THE MAIN EVENt

Thank you for calling my rant cute (HUGS). Okay, but now, fr, let's get into this.

When Ning first discovered Serim watering a dead plant, she waited until she was done watering and caring for said plant and threw it away (bad move, Ning). Around 20 minutes go by, and Serim is just screaming ANGELICA, OH ANGELICA, WHERE ARE YOU. Ning is confused to see Serim lying delirious on the floor where the plant used to be. Ning then tells her that she threw the plant away. Serim then proceeds to cry into Ning's shoulder. Hence, Ningning lets Serim water dead plants.

PLANT SNSD. Let's just say Taeyeon is hanging on for dear life (Serim parys to it every day, Why? I don't know; I don't make the rules). I feel like Serim has a corner of her apartment designated for her snsd plants. All of the snsd plants excluding 2 are alive and well. One is obviously Taeyeon, and the other is none other than..... Yuri, the African milk tree (Euphorbia Trigona). We will never know why Serim has this in her house. Let's just say that Taeyeon looks like a god compared to this poor plant.

Yes, ningning gets into plants only for her first plant to get killed by none other than the gay herself, Serim. Let's just say Serim and Jennie had a bit too much soju.... and serim thought it was a good idea to give Ning's baby plant a little drink, too. Ning, when she later went to Serims apartment, found her plant... dead, killed by soju.

Weedville - A love story between a twink gardening teacher and a confused idol named Ningning who doesn't know how she ended up in this odd girl's class. Ning then discovers that her teacher is delusional because she talks to the plants and sings songs (I imagine Serim randomly singing Gangnam style to plant Taeyeon).

Also, this was so fun to write. I usually get so sick of writing that I need to add Sid the Sloth quotes to make me feel better.

Also, could you, perchance, can create an anon name for mauh (hair flip) I'm to lazy too, or we can just stick with serim and ning twink agenda lady.

hello again, sweetheart :) i don't know what you talking about but i truly love sue sylvester 👍🏻

what do you mean ningning threw away angelica? can aespa stop ruining serim's life? she's gonna collapse 😭 also, serim theater kid agenda is just getting stronger bc why is she going "oh angelica, where are you?" and throwing herself on the floor like okay ROMEO. ningning seeing this and getting too traumatized she just lets her do her thing

so there's two that are dead and gone? sunny and hyo i'm so sorry, i bet serim tried saving you 😔 i didn't remember what an african milk tree was so i searched for it and i'm bawling this is yuri 🫴🏼 (well, this is yuri if serim succeeds in taking care of it)

SHE WATERED A PLANT WITH SOJU ??

WHAT DO U MEAN WEEDVIL- gangnam style of all songs, i'm crying 😭 i see her ass going wow fantastic baby to the plants

i don't actually know what parts of what you're saying are true anymore i picture you as an talking unicorn at this point

well, TALKING UNICORN ANON or just 🦄 anon 🫴🏼

thanks for this, i laughed so much reading it, you're nuts 🙏🏻🫂

[femboydoomer]

How to handle cancel culture

I've never truly been cancelled, but I've been a target of mass harassment. It's a very difficult topic for me, because ever since it first came to my attention that something I've paid no attention to and thought was harmless is considered by the masses a cancellable offence - I've been clinically anxious and paranoid. The way people reacted to my openness and honesty shocked and traumatized me to the point of me considering seizing my online presence and cutting ties with everyone I knew. I knew I did nothing wrong, but the masses made me doubt myself, my character. After two years since the incident and a full year worth of psychotherapy - I have something to say about cancel culture.

If you were cancelled or massively harassed for whatever reason - I'm very sorry and I'm sure you didn't deserve the amount of hate you got.

When the public sheds light on your personal dirt - make sure to understand who's a friend and who's a hater. You might've had a good relationship with your audience, but as soon as they start harassing you and sending you death threats - they're not your fans anymore, they're haters. If you wronged someone - apologize to them, not the haters. Making public apologies, real talks, a whole spectacle with a ukulele out of the situation will make you look weak. Do what needs to be done to right your wrongs and nothing more. You don't owe anything to your audience, they're not your friends or family. It's their fault they've had unrealistic expectations from you.

Perhaps you did something bad, you've hurt someone. Think about the circumstances of the situation. Did you mean to hurt someone? Did they deserve it? Do you regret it? If you think you've really made a mistake - just apologize to the person you've hurt, that's all you can do. You can't undo the past. Your actions might've been bad, but it doesn't make you a bad person.

It's okay if the person you've hurt doesn't forgive you. Don't try to bend your back backwards to please them if they don't accept your apology. Chances are, they will exploit you, thinking it's justified or even ask you to do something impossible or harmful towards yourself. All you owe to them is a sincere apology. Don't promise not to do that again, promise to try. Nobody can promise that they won't make any more mistakes in their life. You're a human, you're not perfect. It doesn't matter what happened ten, five, two years ago, even yesterday. All that matters is tomorrow.

Once you've made things right, or at least tried your best to, proceed with your life. Keep creating, keep moving, keep working. Don't go away, don't disappear, don't let the haters think they've won. If you've experienced lots of stress, betrayal, just general shock from the situation and you feel like you can't keep going - it's okay too. Turn to your friends, your family, people that know you, that understand you. After all, even if the internet burns - you still have your life. Your real life. Focus on it for as long as you need, but make sure to come back. Make sure not to give up.

When on the internet, you meet people of many different cultures and upbringings. The world is not black and white, as cliché as it sounds. What someone might think evil - someone else considers virtuous, what someone might think innocent - someone else considers harmful. It is normal for all of us to have different morals and opinions, they are subjective. Nobody has any business saying "how hard is it not to do the thing", because it might be effortless for some, but for some it might be an internal struggle they have to live with every day.

I'm not asking the masses of the people on the internet to just quit cancelling influencers and be okay with everything they do. I just seriously believe that nobody deserves to be harassed. Vote with your money, your subscription, your like or dislike. Stop interacting with the person you think did something despicable, but don't step down to sending death threats. At least because you are not immune to the same treatment either. We're all real people with real issues in our real lives. Try not to forget that.

[heartonxions]

I invite you to infodump about Dusty in whatever capacity you'd like.

MAN......... WHAT A DELIGHTFUL OPPORTUNITY...... I DO NOT KNOW WHERE TO START... LMAO .. UH .

well.... to get world-building (it is not that.. it is so bare bones and i don't remember what me and my groupmates agreed on...) stuff out of the way... there are multiple worlds and time-traveling exists.. and dusty (and the rest of the gang) works at this time-traveling agency/company where they work to go after time criminals,,,rewrite history,, etc... that's the part i remember...

dusty is from a world where beastmen from the whole spectrum live but she was born in a particularly divided community,, she was deemed too weird, too wild for some and too human for the rest... and was ostracized for most of her life ,,, that is until she meets someone (whom has no name yett so i just call them the ex.. ell o ell) who does treat her like a normal being!! that is.. if she knew what being treated normally and healthily was.... unknowingly to her,,, they later became the leader of a cult who was using her to later be used for a ritual.. but at the beginning they acted like they were in love with him... gaining their trust,, but a few bumps in the road led to them abandoning dusty out of nowhere,,, he stays at their "house" for a bit,, not really realizing that she was abandoned,, they periodically visit their house but one day he sees their truck pull up and the ex proceeds to berate dusty loud enough to draw a crowd,, calling her stupid that she ever believed,,, scolding her for it... it's scathing,, but because she never knew better,, she still stays (not before starting a scuffle with them that lands her in jail--where they start having visions,,, and imaginary friends (cough. gajevy) whom she talks to alot!! and still does!!) and the ex was waiting for her when the sentence was over even!! so she was happy at least that they were there!! And believed that they truly did like her!!

the next climax of her origin story!! She goes back to their house and is coaxed into the basement where uh oh the cult is there..... and the whole thing is blurry in my head but it's like.... the cult needs dusty's blood (sort of because she's as in the middle as beastmen can get) to send the ex back to divinity (they believe they're here to check on the followers/? and so dusty gets chained and muzzled (scar on her right cheek from it) and is covered in all sorts of different types of blood from various animals!! and from her own + her ex's... thus the birth of this image

she escapes and probably kills a few cult members.. but goes on the run for majority of her life now... hence getting her nickname of "roaddog"

she collapses on the side of a road and is lovingly adopted by a kind older masc lesbian... . lol.. whom pushes dusty to call her gam gam or grandma milligan (FORESHADOWING)

and they develop a very sweet relationship where dusty uses her natural strength to help around the barn bc gam gam is getting older and she can't really make a living anymore.... she has slept at her gf's bar (butch4butch btw) when times get rough and stuf.. f.

gam gam unfotunatly is so stubborn that when she shows signs of blindness... she refuses to get help.. (FORESHADOWING..)

dusty whom in my head has been called any and all names,, but not dusty UNTIL she meets gam gam who lovingly calls her dusty when she's bathing her,,, because of all the road dust.. you get it... wtv..

gam gam genuinely sees dusty like a grandchild and also sees that dusty is trying to not be the person she really is (her silliness ... that people find annoying and all the talking to imaginary gajevy friends thing) and she helps her see it as part of her!!! she encourages her to tell her about these things!! they are silly and playful together do you understand me.

and as the seasons pass. gam gam's vision and health gets worse and worse but she still teaches her how to read and write-ish,, table manners,, and embroiders her cowboy hat for her (she forces the cowboy hat into her hand on her deathbed..).. and even crochets gajevy dolls for her!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

she does die.... in one faithful winter.... and in the spring, dusty digs a grave facing the setting sun for her and weaves flower crowns for her every spring she can.. and visits as much as she can..... this is where dusty struggles more .. to try and find and make a living for herself..

she starts off living in the rafters and corners of gam gam's gf's bar,,, and starts a performing and entertaining life there,,, which includes the usual line dance,,, some singing,,, more non-conventional dancing,,, bull-riding shows... vague almost stripper shows... idk.. but she loves the party life.... and whatever gets more poeple to the bar,,, the barowner doesn't really mind.

she leaves this life one day.. getting bored... and is unfortunately caught shortly for the humanoid version of illegal dog-fighting rings... and meets some group of other cowboys that she gets attached to very quickly

unfortunately for her though of course.. they all break up... and she feels lost in life again... wistfully eating off rodents and rusty water.... until she gets recruited into this time traveling company (part time time crime,, shortened to pttc) where she meets her wonderful wonderful friends she is not afraid to lovee!!! all 6'6" of her beefy body is full of love for her loved ones <3

[daidonzo]

Chapter 25: Well baby, I surrender to the strawberry ice cream [Chishiya x Reader]

You wanted to leave this ridiculous game and be done with it, once and for all.

That didn't mean you were pro-torturing someone.

Just as Chishiya had first guessed, Matsushita was the Jack. It had been quite easy to discover - you all had just remained in your cells for a few more minutes after you had said your suits (all of you correctly except for poor Kotoko) and the door had been unlocked. He had proceed to exclaim things such as "I win!", thinking the sound of the office woman's head being blown off came from more than once cell and laugh like a truly demented person would.

Was there no one mentally sane anymore when it came to face cards?

First there was Mira, who should be admitted into a psychiatric hospital immediately. Not only for participating as a sort of game master in this games, but for being part of The Beach for as long as she did, acting like an undercover agent of sorts, and still go forward, when she had seen so many people die and suffer. Then, the King of Spades, who was completely nuts and seemed to think the Borderlands was the perfect scenario for a retelling of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre only with anti-tank rifles and who knows what other weapons, and last but not least, Matsushita, who just seemed to not be in his right mind.

And, to be honest, just the fact that someone didn't care about other people literally losing their lives was very telling. At least for you.

Anyway, Chishiya had been the one to leave the prison cells first and had told the man his little speech, about how he had discovered he was the Jack of Hearts. You had also left your cell, but were silent, just screaming "Go, Chishiya go!" in your head and, maybe a little bit, enjoying the feeling of outsmarting someone else.

What you didn't love so much was the fact that then, Banda and Yaba had decided they were going to torture Matsushita to get information about this world, and about how to become part of it. That's the reason why the former hadn't killed him in the last round.

"Bunch of nutcases." You had declared, back in the snack room, Chishiya eating his cookies seating down by a bench as if nothing was happening, you taking up the task of filling the silence to try and avoid hearing any screams. He deserved it. But you didn't approve, couldn't approve, who would? "Who would want to stay here? I mean, Banda, sure, he is a murderer after all but I thought the Yaba guy was nothing more than a businessman!" You were walking around the room, gesticulating dramatically to emphasize your words.

"Some people haven't lived a blessed life."

Your eyes focused on him, wondering if what he said was just a mere comment or if there was something else to be implied with those words.

"What about you?" You asked, directly.

"Tell me a memory you have about your father."

You frowned, not because he was not answering your question - it was something he did often and you knew better by then. But because, what did you father have to do with any of this?

"I don't know. He always buys me blueberries because he knows I like them the most, so every time he goes to get groceries, I know there is a box of them waiting for me by the kitchen's table." You made a conscious effort to speak about him in the present tense.

"And one thing you like to do together?"

"We both like to eat. We would go try out new restaurants or make home-cooked meals together, for example."

"My most prominent memory about my father is seeing the back of his head."

A small smile had been appearing in your lips while speaking about your dad, but it vanished when you heard the blonde man say those words.

"We rarely talk, even now. He is always with the computer, surrounded by medical books. His marriage to my mother wasn't due to love, either, nothing but a formality. This meant she was not happy. That led to a difficult childhood."

You didn't know what to say. You were just staring. He simply lifted his shoulders up and down. He looked unaffected by what he was telling you. Maybe so much time had passed that now he simply accepted it.

You sat down next to him, and grabbed his hand, holding it between both of yours.

"I'm sorry."

"It's fine."

"No, it's not. I'm really sorry. I don't know what else to say…"

"It is in the past."

"Yeah, but…" You were biting the inside of your cheek, trying to find the words. There were none. He was right, it was in the past, and nothing you could say would make him feel better about it. "Oh, your dad just did that so that you could have a nice life." "I'm sure your mother was hurt because of the unhappy marriage, but I'm sure she still loves you very much!" No. That was bullshit. There was no point. You could only look forward. To the future.

"What's your favorite fruit?"

"Hm? Maybe strawberries. Why?"

"When we are back in the real world…" You started, smiling at him, leaning your head to one side. "I will buy you strawberries every time I go to the grocery store. I'll try really, really hard that my roommate doesn't get to them before you, maybe I'll have to hide them somewhere. But then, every time you come to visit me, you will have strawberries."

He smiled back, openly, sincerely.

"Will you also make me home-cooked meals?" There he was. Back to messing with you.

"No. I am horrible at cooking, I might burn the house down and I'm renting. I can make you like, spaghetti maybe, but they may get stuck to the pot. But we can order takeaway!"

You kept talking, making plans for an uncertain future until the round ended.

Matsushita killed himself, the torture inflicted by Yaba and Banda too much to withstand for another hour.

You won the game, but it really didn't feel good. Almost like cheating.

What felt great was Chishiya's hand in yours while you were leaving the penitentiary center.

Just as you crossed the door, the massive zeppelin looming over it started to blow up and burn.

"Is that going to happen every single time we clear one of those games!?" You asked after an initial scream of surprise. Your blonde companion was as undisturbed as always.

"I guess so."

"I hope nobody was standing right below it."

He chuckled. "I first meant what I said about you being the white knight of this place as a joke, but now…"

"Would that make you my sweet damsel in distress?"

You could almost hear the lifted eyebrow.

"Do I look like one?"

"Blonde, pretty, dressed in white to symbolize your purity… Yes, you do."

"No."

"Yes." You were pretending to be serious, but almost couldn't hold your laughter any longer. "Now, let's get out of here before my princess gets burned to death by the remains of an airship falling on her… It would be a very anticlimatic ending, wouldn't it?"

[nikethestatue]

I'm thinking of leaving this fandom too. Honestly, I truly loved and enjoyed meeting fellow Elriels. One of the kindest and brilliant people I've met online. I've been in this fandom for years now, even before acosf came out. But I can't deal with the general acotar fandom now, and sadly, no matter how much I loved all the Elriel/Feysand contents, and friends here, it's not enough anymore.

I didn't signed up for this. I didn't signed up for the constant bullying, name calling, slut shaming, misogyny, victim blaming, pitting women against each other and etc., I didn't know the fandom will turn out like this, like a true hell for someone who only wanted a break from real life. I'd like to blame acosf because most of the misogynistic take started after it was released.

I didn't signed up for all the dumb takes. Honestly now? I felt SO ashamed of being part of this fandom. I was friends with someone on the other fandom when some people from acotar fandom started making fun of the characters from the other fandom and they started comparing unprovoked. It was so embarrassing that even though I am not mutuals with those people, I still ended up telling my friend I'm not in this fandom anymore.

I didn't signed up for idiocracy or delusions. No, all the takes that gets crazier everyday? No matter how much I convinced myself that it was funny and time will come when they'll be proven wrong and would leave this fandom (because most of them hate what sjm writes/loves. They hate Feysand, they hate the IC, they hate everyone but the two characters) it's not working anymore. It felt like "wow, really, I'm in the same fandom of people who actually think (or better yet not using their minds over a simple fun series) like this?" I hate to be categorized with these people.

I didn't signed up to lowkey get called stupid because apparently I don't have a degree on literature, fashion, or whatever. I hate how I saw a woman in this fandom dragging women down because they have "big job and helps to fight misogyny, what are you doing? I'm above you." when she's the most misogynistic person everyone ever met.

The arguments are repetitive, most posts are the same or just being aggressive. I'm actually just staying on tumblr for the fanfics and theories now but like what I said, the negative side of this fandom wins, and it's so so toxic for me.

Acotar fandom are full of misogynistic people (not all, but most) and they are even proud of it. You will see it on every tiktok, Instagram, Reddit, fb and Twitter posts (especially if it's about Feyre, Elain, Mor, N&C), you'd see the horrible comments against women characters and downplay their nasty behavior as "its just fiction" well yes, but considering how they act like this? What more in real life?

You can't have a decent argument here or have the chance to clear your name because the next thing you know everyone will post you on their Instagram Stories or blog with all their thousands of followers to see and they'll proceed to shun out an entire group.

Oh let me say that even acotar Reddit isn't a safe space for everyone. Not unless you stan Tamlin, Lucien, Eris or Azriel. There are people from Facebook who also infiltrates the elriel group and made fun of us on the comments. This fandom is a shitshow.

And yes, since I'm already in this, I hate how someone would literally badmouth elriels to ARTISTS. Who'd tell horrible things to the point where artists refuse to take comms or draws the ship. I was so baffled when I learned this from a friend. Like really? How petty can people be in this fandom?

It never felt safe anymore. And our feelings? Invalid. Only some group of people in this fandom has a say.

It's like suddenly after acosf, we're suddenly invaded by 5 years old who thinks being a gIrlboSs is cute.

And sadly maybe this is like my goodbye letter to this fandom. (Not to Feysand & Elriel, but I'll just connect when acotar 5 is released) It was such a great ride at first, but suddenly became cancer.

I don't have the heart to actually post this on my blog. I stopped answering anons because I'm slowly distancing myself.

I hope to have another pre acosf days, or better days where acotar readers doesn't compare traumas, wanted a woman character to suffer/punished, doesn't put value on women based on their womb, people who thinks they are above everyone and have to hate on female characters in general.

Ps: when acotar 5 drops, I'll never ever think twice on visiting acotar fandom again (but would never say bye to my friends)

I honestly admire you and the other OGs for staying here for so long. I know what you all went through silently in this fandom, and I admire the strength and class on how you all handled it.

That's all, thanks for reading this. (I'll surely miss sending you anon asks about acotar stuffs lol, I love your response everytime)

Oh Anon. Yes. To all of this.

It's a sad anon, not gonna like, it was hard to read it, because it's so very true.

It's been eye-opening, being in this fandom, as someone who kind of older and been around the block a few times. I thought that something's changed. That women talking about women's changed. That women thinking about women's changed. That we've been fighting the same battles. That we were kind of past appearances, hobbies, inclinations, abilities, and we were going to be accepting and kind towards other women. Nope. Not so much.

That's been the most shocking thing for me to witness in these past few years. The intense cruelty that women are willing to subject other women to...over a book. Over a character. It's weird. And if you are not in it, you wouldn't actually believe it. But it's true.

I think it's the anonymity of online existence that allows people to be like that. Or maybe it's like the Salem Witch trials--young girls being cruel to others only to be heard. Accusing and acting out for attention. Maybe things haven't changed all that much.

I will stay because I have to see this thing through. I think the next ACOTAR book will be announced sooner than we think.

But after it's done, after Elain's book is done, I'll be off faster than a prom dress.

(if you feel comfortable, tell me who you are, so if I don't see you, I know you left)

Hugs. Be in a place that's good for you and your soul and your psyche.

[anadrenalineslut]

In Defense of Joe Alwyn

You can validate Taylor Swift's queerness without demonizing her relationship with her boyfriend, btw. I'm really sick of the stupid fucking arguments that I see gaylors make to support their delusional take that Joe is a beard.

#1 - Grammygate: I didn't think I'd have to point out utterly delusional you have to be as a TAYLOR SWIFT fan to believe she would EVER let a fucking MAN receive credit on her music if she didn't believe they actually deserved that fucking credit. Taylor Got Canceled in 2016 Because She Didn't Like That Kayne Line and Endured A Year Long Depression Episode As a Result Swift would give credit to a man after that, are you STUPID?

#2 - There are no "romantic" songs about Joe, just "glitter gel pen" songs: then proceeds to insist that "call it what you want" is about karlie kloss despite all the "he" pronouns" and joe references, denies delicate, dress (minus the "best friend" line which is a karlie REFERENCE but she's speaking to joe still lmfao), end game, ready for it, gorgeous, new year's day, king of my heart, lover, i think he knows, paper rings (although it's upbeat, it's a very vulnerable song), daylight, afterglow, it's nice to have a friend, invisible string, the lakes, peace, long story short, etc are about Joe.

#3- "if I was joe, I don't know how I'd feel about my girlfriend saying that someone else was like a meteor strike/i'll be getting over you my whole life/they've never seen a love as pure as it etc." : first of all, taylor swift isn't dating YOU so I truly do not give a fuck what your dating boundaries are. This isn't an argument that someone's relationship is fake you dumb bitch lmfao.

If I was dating the songwriter of my generation, I would not give two flying fucks what she sings about her PAST relationships because I know that I'm treating her correctly and her exes didn't. Taylor doesn't pine after exes, doesn't write songs about exes unless she's sure she wants nothing to do with them anymore, so if I was Joe- I'd be proud as hell of my girlfriend for continuing to make music out of highly traumatic and emotional pain.

#4- joe cannot be a beard because their relationship is not a public one. I'm so tired of dumb asses saying things like "joe is a beard because he never talks about taylor in interviews!" Like.... are you okay? how is that evidence of a BEARD CONTRACT you dumb ass? Do you know what a beard contract is, it's literally a PUBLIC FACING RELATIONSHIP that is meant to hide the sexualities of BOTH parties through constant PR and EXPOSURE.

WHERE IS THE FUCKING PR? There are five photos of the two of them together- this is not evidence of a SIX YEAR LONG PR STUNT YOU DUMB ASSES.

Please stop saying that joe is a beard, you sound fucking delusional and i'm tired of you representing the gaylor community. we don't want you in here <3

[etherbonded]

self-indulgent drabble time

GENERAL CONTENT: Familial Trauma and Issues ( i don't know how to exactly tag it beyond that but just know to proceed with caution bc this is definitely not a light drabble in the slightest. )

" I miss when you ere a child and when you still loved me. " Are the words Homura, her mother, utters that causes Himari to finally crack after years. She hadn't talked to her mother in so long, she thought things could change but... of course she was wrong. Her mother is still blind.

" What child? From what I remember I was practically raising and taking care of myself when I was 7. I was the one always making sure you were okay after that man yelled and verbally berated you. I always took care of you and put myself aside. " It's curt, and Himari knows how sour this conversation is going to go now. For she knows how this story ends, because she's gone through this far too many times.

" Himari I did the best I could to raise you, I was always there for you. I don't know why- "

" You don't know why? Why I don't love you anymore? Why I cut you out of my life? That's a simple answer Homura. I don't love you anymore because you never loved me like I deserved to be. You were willing to throw me out the moment you found out I made such a similar mistake to YOURS until you found out I was going to marry the father. No mother that loves their kid would put them through or even think to put them through the same pain you went through! A MOTHER THAT LOVES HER CHILD DOES NOT MAKE HER CHILD BELIEVE THAT SHE NEEDS TO USE HER LOOKS TO GET LOVE! " Himari's far from done but her mother is just about to get started too.

" It's not MY fault you weren't smart enough to realize to not make the same mistakes I did! And it's not my fault that all people ever truly want out of a person they love is their body and their looks! True love is a bunch of bullshit Himari, it's fairytale shit I never taught you because you needed to realize how the world worked before it hurt you! But it's clear I failed you there. I was simply ready to show you there are consequences for your mistakes! God, you're SO dramatic, I can't believe you're the daughter I gave birth to. I thought you'd at least have a good head on your shoulders. " Homura is full of pain and bitterness... after everything she's done... this is how she's repaid by her daughter? For toughening her daughter up for the world? " You're doing just fine in life with everything you 'claim' I've done. I've made you tougher, I taught you how to survive. "

That's it, that's what makes Himari crack underneath it all. " You think I'm doing fine? Just because I'm tougher and can handle it I'm FINE? You don't know SHIT about me Homura. I may seem fine on the outside but I'm far from. I'm better, but I will never heal from the bullshit you and him put me through. You may have taught me how to survive, sure, I'll give you that much. " Himari's not going to take this shit, she's tired of this. She can't deal with this anymore so she stands up and proceeds to head to the door. Only to hear the words,

" DONT YOU DARE WALK AWAY FROM YOUR MOTHER! "

As her fingers grasp on the door handle, she turns her head over her shoulder with a laugh and a cold smile towards her mother. "I have no mother. "

[a-hell-of-a-time]

How do you feel about your niece?

Ask my character "How do you feel about ______?" Can be an idea, person(s), place, or thing, and they'll have to answer honestly. : Accepting!

"While it might be hard to believe, I care for Octavia a great deal. It pains me to see her go through the turmoil that is her parent's deteriorating marriage, and to see her being neglected by, not just her father, but her mother as well. It also pains me to see just hoe fractured her relationship to Stella truly is, and by extension, her relation to myself now that she is older.

When Octavia was younger, it felt as if we were closer than we are now, and I wonder if there wasn't more I could have, or should have done to keep our bond strong.

I do not wish to lose her, but I fear that is what will happen should the divorce proceed and become finalized. It is clear that she will stick to her father over her mother, and if Stella is not careful, Octavia may very well cut her, and thus our side of the family out of her life."

He heaved a tired sigh. "I don't know what to do anymore other than push forward to secure something for our family, or at the very least protect my sister from the politics of this whole affair. As much as I love my niece, I also love my sister and need to look out for her..." But was it worth losing everything else?

[safesthaveninexistence]

Laika is very goofy she makes me laugh a lot but she is so sweet reassuring me she can be serious at times when needed to be. Laika and I laugh over THE DUMBEST SHIT. Laika and I just love to touch each other all the time. We casually touch each other all the time. Thank God we don't have to unbearably wait for each other anymore. Thank God I'm in the very real reality where Laika and I never have to unbearably wait for each other anymore. We get to touch each other see each other kiss each other fuck each other all we want omg so freely. FUCK YES SO FUCKING SATISFYING. Like thank God that actually happened I DIDNT ACTUALLY THINK THAT WAS GON HAPPEN BUT DAMN BITCH IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED. Just like how in the beginning I ain't think seeing signs of Laika was fin happen but damn it actually happened and them signs are serious, they are legit leading me to Laika the ENTIRE TIME in the physical realm. It's mindfucking and inexpressibly profound. Especially since I'm 26 years old and she's LEGIT 27! ALL THE SIGNS I SAW ABOUT NOT HAVING TO WAIT ARE THE REAL DEAL, LEGIT, AUTHENTIC, VALID. Wow I truly do live in the utmostestly trustworthiest Universe. I truly shedded wounds. I satisfyingly shed wounds and what's left behind is the utmostestly clearest skin. So grateful I incredulously figured it out. Wow. I fr figured out how to not have to wait for Laika anymore. So grateful Laika played a huge role in that too. Phew. So grateful the Universe played a huge role in me not having to wait anymore for Laika in the physical realm. So grateful my emotional world didn't make me wait anymore for me to have my Laika instantly. I'm incredulously shocked I did it now. Wow that's crazy I don't even fear typos I incredulously see they hold no power. Man I'm so grateful I'm the most powerful sorcerer. I'm so grateful I'm the most powerful wizard. I'm so grateful I'm the most powerful witch. I'm so grateful I'm the most powerful Mage. I'm so grateful I'm the most powerful Psychic. I'm so grateful I'm the most powerful conjuror. I'm so grateful I'm the most powerful spawner. I'm so grateful i got the most powerful spiritual gifts. I'm so grateful I got the most powerful mind. I'm so grateful I got the most powerful intelligence and heart. I'm so grateful I got the most powerful energy. I'm so grateful I got the most powerful healing. All the times I thought I saw Laika in the psychic realm are actually valid, true. Wow. I'm shook. So grateful everytime Laika and I eat at restaurants Laika always ensures we sits together, next to each other. She doesn't want to be away from me🥰🥰🥰🥰🤍🤍✨🫧🥹🥹🥹 So grateful for all the surefire portals that got us together in the physical realm🥰🥰🤍🤍🥹🫧✨ OMG I TELL LAIKA AT THE FANCY LUXURIOUS RESTAURANT ABOUT THAT TIME THAT MAGICAL TIME I SAW A SIGN OF HER AND WAS STUNNED IT ACTUALLY CAME TO LIFE AND LAIKA IS INCREDULOUSLY MINDBLOWN then proceeds to tell me im so Magical LIKE DUDE WE EVEN HAVE CONVERSATIONS ABOUT WHAT WAS THE MOST CRAZIEST MAGICAL SIGNS WE SAW OF EACH OTHER BEFORE WE ACTUALLY MET EACH OTHER! I tell her MINE IS THE FACT I TOOK THAT LEAP OF FAITH AND SAW THIS PERSON THAT REMINDED ME OF HER LIKE LETTING ME KNOW WE GON FT OR SOMETHING THEN SHE UNCANNILY SMILED AT ME AND WAVED AT ME SAYING HI AND IT FELT REAL PERSONAL SO I KNEW IT WAS YOU, LAIKA. So grateful it wasn't just me, Laika pined for me too. Laika knew of me too before we met each other. Laika manifested me too. Laika visualized and daydreamed me too. Laika feels and sees me everywhere too. Wow. So grateful I shedded absolutely all of my wounds before I met her. Like shit is just straight up easy healthy Magical real mystical and effortless. Like we deadass just popped up in each other's realities so effortlessly, mystically, instantaneously, lifechangingly, Magically, powerfully. We both are stunned to see the signs of each other are direly gravely profoundly serious as a heart attack. So grateful Laika shedded absolutely all of her wounds before she met me too. How fucking satisfying we both are healed. Choosing each other.