#truly an offensive email to get

[voylitscope]

The way I am insulted by this email I got after I watched CA:TWS last night:

Hey, did you enjoy Captain America: The Winter Soldier? Did you enjoy Steve Rogers as a character? Did you enjoy literally anything about Steve and Bucky's relationship? Well, we actually hate when people like those things. We hate it so much that we're going to suggest you watch MCU movies in an order that makes absolutely no sense and would confuse you deeply if you really did it. We're going to suggest you make a totally illogical jump in films and watch Endgame next!

Like, I don't really think that whatever algorithm Disney+ uses to send out these marketing emails takes any of that into account. But. For fuck's sake.

[lizzaneia-elizalde]

Request: Knoxx Wyatt (cowboy yandere) reacting to us (his darling) deciding to go back to the city (cause we got better job prospects or something, I don’t know). What would this man do to keep us from leaving? (And I guess this would still technically be early into the “relationship” where we aren’t long term commitment or haven’t truly “defined” the relationship yet). I just wanna see this man become unhinged. See his “yan” side 😉

P.S. Don’t ever feel guilty about your pregnancy/baby stories. I love them (and probably a lot of your fans since we all most likely got breeding/pregnancy kinks…cause this is Tumblr after all…😘)

Yandere! Cowboy x New in town! Teacher! gn! Reader

WHAT IF: Darling goes back to the city?

Thanks for the reassurance anon! I was seriously getting worried LMAO. Now, I think you know where this is going with what would Knoxx do...

TW: Tampered contraceptives, forced breeding.

"Darlin... What do you mean by that?"

Knoxx gripped the saddle in his hands, his eyes wide as saucers.

You shrugged and gave him your phone which he snatched up immediately.

It was an email in which you're assigned to be a teacher in a prestigious University.

Knoxx felt cold in the stomach. The veins on his arm starting to bulge, blood pumping hastily to his heart as his mind went haywire with the prospect of you--

No, he can't even imagine it.

"But Darlin, yer only been 'ere for months. Not even a year." Knoxx whispered, trying to grit back the wallowing despair in his chest.

"That's what I said! But it's such a good opportunity. With a salary that's definitely much better. No offense."

"N-none taken."

"Besides, I still got two months here!"

Knoxx bit the inside of his cheeks, feeling his molars squish down the flesh, piercing it and letting the blood flow down to his tongue, tasting the metallic flavor before it trickled down to his throat.

Yet, no matter how much he hurts himself, he's not waking from his nightmare.

He wanted to let out a bitter cry but all he could do is laugh deeply. His eyes shaking from the raging emotions that threatened to bubble out.

His mind, heart, and body screamed to hold you down and break your legs, locking you up.

But he didn't.

He let out a trembling sigh and gave a wry smirk.

"Is that so, darlin? Congratulations." He mustered up his best acting skills and bowed with his cowboy hat on his chest.

His smirk widened when he gazed at your body, eyes hungrily drinking in your form.

"How about this, darlin? Let's make the most of those two months. You and me, fucking like animals. Just like you wanted." Knoxx grinned, gulping the blood and giving you such predatory eyes that he knows you love.

You shivered, heat pooling your stomach and lighting up arousal in your body.

"okay. Later night?"

"Oh sure, darlin."

Knoxx pocketed his fist on his jeans, fidgeting with the condoms he had in tow, while his eyes bore into the pin you have on your chest. Specifically, the pointy end.

"See you later."

~~~Two months later~~~

By the time you were supposed to leave the town, you threw up in the toilet bowl, emptying the hearty meal you prepared yourself. The smell of the paprika and pepper singing your sinuses and making you nauseous once more.

Your heart raced.

You loved pepper and paprika chicken.

You loved spicy foods.

Why would it make you sick?

Food poisoning? No. Impossible.

Your legs shook as you stood up, looking at the bedroom and seeing Knoxx's naked back hugging your pillow.

With a frantic search in the bedroom, you spot the used condoms on the floor beside your bed, and your breath hitched, seeing it leak on the tip. It's tampered with. Every. Single. Condom.

Did he also poked holes on the other condoms he used with your previous encounters?

You felt nauseous once more, but this time, due to your disgust and betrayal, mixed with fear.

You wanted to cry, to scream.

But you don't want to risk waking him up.

You need to get out of there.

With a hasty yet careful movement, you dressed up and ran outside, but stopped when you heard growls. Dog growls.

Knoxx herding dogs were circling you, backing you up back to the porch of your house. Eyes hostile yet calm, they herded you back to the frame of the door until you bumped into a hard surface.

You tensed, feeling two strong arms circle around your waist and felt the hands palm your stomach.

"Hmm... Bun in the oven. How delightful."

Knoxx's husky and deep voice sent shivers down your spine as he kissed your neck and slowly swayed you left to right.

"darlin, let's go back to bed. Pregnancy this early is especially dangerous for you."

You wanted to scream and shout, yet Knoxx's ranch was too big for other people to hear.

Was Knoxx's house this far from the town?

Was Knoxx's ranch always this deserted?

You felt something cover your head, making you flinch.

It's his cowboy hat.

Remember, he already staked his claim on you.

You're his.

[sysakiddo]

Daniel is an overworked scientist who needs litres of coffee to function properly. He likes doing the research and he is acclaimed enough to be treated like a popstar in the community. He likes the attention that comes with it, likes being invited to symposiums where they ask him about his work. 

One day, he gets an email from the head of the association he is part of. The subject of the mail says kid has balls. Daniel chuckles and opens it, finds out it's a research paper that's been printed out two days ago. His own work is referenced multiple times. He scrolls down to the first mention. 

Ricciardo et al. (2024) conclude that this effect is caused by the failure of humanitarian interventions in Africa so far. This can be, of course, easily debunked. The success or failure of humanitarian intervention can be measured by at least sixteen different variables (Schmidt 2022). Ricciardo et al. (2024) use three variables. One must therefore doubt the validity and accuracy of these conclusions. 

Daniel scoffs. He doesn't read the paper, only shoots a quick reply email with nothing but lol. 

He forgets about it soon enough. Ain't nobody dissing Daniel in his own research field. But a similar email comes again in a month, and Daniel's mood is sour. This time, it's a reaction to a speech he had at a random symposium. 

Ricciardo (2024) steers clear of defining this geopolitical concept in a definitive matter. He reconstructed the operationalisation of the concept numerous times. This ambiguity is unfortunate and detracts from the validity of the whole research. 

Daniel yells at Josh across his office. “Come and look at this shit, mate!” Josh doesn't have the reaction Daniel hoped for. He reads the passage and cackles evilly at his sour look. “Is it the same guy as the last time? You got your ass handed to you,” 

Daniel reaches his limit the third time it happens. He looks up the author of the paper. Verstappen, Max Emillian, PhD., Associate Professor with Tenure. Yale University. Daniel's frown deepens. He reads the offensive passage again. 

Numerous researchers claimed the same. For example, Ricciardo (2022) used a survey to collect data from citizens of the contented districts and concluded the same thing. A survey is hardly a good choice for this type of research question, as it is highly reductionist and cannot be duplicated with high validity. 

Daniel has enough. He is going to confront this guy when he attends the same work thingy as him. He won't let an Ivy League freak diss his research. 

And he is truly ready the next time he is at a black tie event. Josh knows about the plan and it's him who finds that dick first. He points a finger at a man standing just a few feet away from Daniel, his back turned to him. Daniel nods to himself and strides to the group where his nemesis stands. Luckily, he sees Alex in the group, who waves at him to come over. “Hey, Alex!” Daniel exclaims loudly enough that everyone looks over, even the man Daniel has his hate speech prepared for. 

He is SO not prepared for the gaze that lands on him, the steely blue eyes and wide shoulders and thick, thick tights that are on full display in his dress pants. Daniel's mouth is suddenly very dry. He tries to swallow. It doesn't help. Max is looking at him with a slight smirk on his face. Alex is saying something, and Daniel nods even though he has no idea what was said. 

“You must be Daniel,” Daniel says nonsensically, then chokes. “Or, no! Oh my god. I am Daniel. You are, of course, doctor Verstappen. Gosh, it's so hot in here, isn't it?” 

The smirk on Max's face grows more prominent. He still doesn't say anything. Daniel thinks he hears Alex trying to hold back his giggles. He brings the wine glass to his mouth but doesn't drink from it, petrified he is going to spill it all over himself. Don't look at his tits, don't look at his tits, he chants at himself but doesn't really succeed. His cheeks are way too warm to look naturally flushed.

“So, yeah. That was embarrassing. I got some new funding. Would you be interested in being a part of my new project?”

[lucagray813]

The Tang Chronicles - Chapter 1

Rating: G

Word Count: ~3,404

Characters: Tang, Pigsy, MK, Pigsy's Grandmother

Relationships: Everyone & Everyone

Summary: Tang meets MK for the first time. He's a weird kid.

Additional Tags: Slice of Life, Pre-Canon, Kid MK

CW: Swearing

Link to AO3 Version

Chapter Navigation: First | Prev | Next

----

Tang wouldn't generally consider himself to be an unobservant person but as he stood holding his throbbing nose and belatedly read the closed sign on the door to Pigsy's Noodles, he could only be grateful no-one had been around to witness his embarrassing moment, especially not the titular Pigsy.

In his defence though, never in the three years that he'd religiously been coming to Pigsy's Noodles had the restaurant ever been closed on a Saturday and definitely not because of a family emergency. The hastily scribbled sign on the door was apologetic but light on details and he found himself frowning in concern.

While he was pretty put out about his favourite restaurant being closed, he genuinely hoped nothing terrible had happened to Pigsy or his grandmother, Xiùyīng. He'd gotten to know them both pretty well over the last few years, and he'd even go as far as to call the former a friend.

He wished he had a way to contact him and check in but they'd never really had a cause to exchange phone numbers. Well, maybe he could find a way to send a message via the restaurant's social media or find a business email address or something once he'd found somewhere else to study for the day.

----

He never ended up sending that message and, due to truly unfortunate circumstances, it actually ended up being a whole week before he was able to visit the restaurant in person again. And, bar a couple of trips home to visit his mother, it was probably the longest he'd ever been forced to go without Pigsy's cooking since he'd discovered it.

He felt like he was going through withdrawal. And if he didn't get his fix today then surely he would perish.

His boyfriend, Mǐnyǒng, had all but kicked him out of the flat this morning, clearly fed up with his dramatics. But while no-one could step to his love of Pigsy's cooking, Mǐnyǒng had become rather partial to it as well and had lovingly demanded he bring back his favourite order when he eventually managed to roll his way home later.

He was ready to walk through the door to Pigsy's Noodles before it even officially opened, a privilege he'd been awarded some time ago, and, after a quick double check to make sure the door was indeed unlocked this time, he sauntered in and all but melted at the mouthwatering aromas he was met with.

Pigsy wasn't in the kitchen but chances were high he was just grabbing something from the back so he turned to say hello to Xiùyīng who was sitting in one of the booths but he tripped over his cheerful greeting as he was met with a pair of unfamiliar, unblinking eyes.

The boy was human and looked to be about five years old and he was staring him down with a rather unnerving intensity. Thankfully, Xiùyīng noticed the boy had stopped drawing and looked up to see what had caught his attention.

She smiled as she waved at him, "Oh! Mr. Tang! We were wondering where you'd disappeared to! Come and say hello to MK!"

MK? Like the oyster sauce brand? Nah, couldn't be. Must just be a coincidence. Weird name either way though.

Not wanting to cause any offense he walked closer and tried to put on a friendly smile, "Xiùyīng, I'm glad to see you're alright. I was worried when I saw that sign on the door. Uh, hi, MK?"

Xiùyīng didn't seem at all worried about the fact the boy just kept staring at him, blithely responding, "Oh, don't you worry, we're all fine. Better than fine actually! It was quite the drama though! But I'll have to fill you in when little ears aren't listening." She gently nudged the boy sitting beside her, "MK, do you want to say hello to Mr. Tang?"

MK hadn't so much as blinked since he'd got here and, to his discomfort, continued to sit and stare up at him silently. Xiùyīng didn't seem at all put off by this odd behaviour though, patting his head fondly as she explained, "You'll have to forgive him, he's a shy little thing. But take his staring as a compliment! He's normally very skittish, hiding away whenever anyone tries to get a good look at him, he must be able to tell you're a good soul."

He smiled awkwardly and tried to wave away the compliment, "Ah, you're too kind." He started to touch his face and his hair self-consciously, "I probably just have bed head or a giant spot or something."

"Yeah, and it's right in the middle of your forehead too."

He slapped both hands over his forehead as he swiveled around to see Pigsy in the kitchen. Face red, he disputed, "No, I don't!"

Pigsy just smirked tiredly, "Why you covering it up then?"

He was saved from having to retort by Xiùyīng lightly scolding, "Leave the poor boy alone. And I don't care how well you get on, don't forget he's still a customer! Mr. Tang, don't listen to him. There's nothing on your face."

Smug, he removed his hands and crossed his arms, "Yeah, Pigsy. Don't forget who's the paying customer here."

Pigsy rolled his eyes and huffed, muttering something no doubt unflattering under his breath. If it weren't for the presence of his grandmother, he wouldn't have hesitated to bicker with him but as it was he could only side eye him as he took his rightful seat at the counter.

It was as he was pulling out his laptop that Pigsy asked, "Where have you been anyway? You know you have to put in leave if you want to go on holiday. I was ready to put the job notice out and everything."

It was a long running gag that Tang unofficially worked at the restaurant and they had all sorts of inside jokes to go along with it - calling in for a delivery was him calling in sick, for example - and normally it was easy to fall into the familiar banter but he'd been waiting to complain about his week to Pigsy, well, all week!

He moaned, "Pigsy, you have no idea what kind of week I've had! Last Sunday Mǐnyǒng and I went on the date from hell!"

It was one of those days where everything that could go wrong, did go wrong - broken down cars, public transport with no AC, reservation mix ups... The list went on until eventually it culminated in the pair of them taking an unceremoniously dip in a lake.

"I don't know what was in that water but the pair of us were sick for rest of the week! And on top of that I still had to get my essay done! Pigsy, when I tell you that I suffered..."

He startled slightly as Xiùyīng commented behind him, "I swear you must have been born under an unlucky star - the amount of misfortune that befalls you..."

He had all but forgotten she and MK were there but at least when he turned around the kid's stare looked enraptured rather than unsettling. He wasn't sure how much he had understood but he knew he was quite the energetic story teller, all the hand waving and miming had probably been entertaining enough.

A little sheepishly he responded, "Actually, all my stars are pretty auspicious. My mother has been tearing her hair out over my bad luck since I was born - she's tried everything to find a way to combat it. Fortune tellers, talismans, good luck charms but nothing ever works."

Honestly, he didn't think his luck was that bad. Sure, he found himself in bizarre situations at times but for the most part he escaped unscathed. He may have been sick this last week but he was perfectly fine now and as miserable as it had been, he'd gotten to cuddle up to his boyfriend the entire time and he had a great story to tell.

Overall, it balanced itself back out. Not that he didn't like to complain at length when misfortune did strike him but sue him, he liked complaining.

Xiùyīng tutted, "That's because she'll have been going to human fortune tellers. MK, can I borrow some of your paper? Thank you, sweetheart. Here, I know an excellent divinator downtown..."

As she scribbled down the details, in crayon of all things, he cast a somewhat exasperated look at Pigsy, only to find him shooting his grandmother an annoyed look, as he often did when she felt the need to pass comments on humans and demons in front of him.

He didn't really take any offence to it and just thanked her as he walked over and took the offered piece of paper. She warned him, "I have an appointment with him next month so don't think I won't find out if you've not been to see him."

He laughed nervously, as he tried to talk his way out of this, "I don't think I'll be able to see him that soon. I have so many deadlines coming up and if he's as good as you say he is then no doubt he'll be fully booked!"

She wasn't at all deterred, "He'll want to see you straight away! You're at such a crucial stage of your education - you can't let bad luck rob you of all your hard work now! In fact, I'll call him right now for you! Where's my phone?"

He spared precious seconds glaring at Pigsy for sniggering before he very politely tried to dissuade her from booking him an appointment, "No, no! I couldn't ask you to do that! And I would need to check my schedule anyway! I promise I'll have a look at it tonight! Please don't trouble yourself!"

She waved him away, "Oh, nonsense. It's no trouble at all but it does look like I've left that blasted phone upstairs. But don't think I won't be checking to make sure you actually made an appointment!"

There was no getting out of it. If he gave any excuse that this guy couldn't see him then she absolutely would call him personally to argue his case. He willed himself not to hang his head in defeat as he promised again that he would sort it out tonight.

He then had to endure an hour of her telling him all about this fortune teller's credentials and how he'd helped so and so with this or a friend of a friend with that. Pigsy only added fuel to the fire, reminding her of stories she'd forgotten and ensuring that he got zero work done.

MK had largely gone back to doodling with his crayons but as customers started to come in he started to push himself closer to Xiùyīng's side, eventually going as far as to hide his face against her too. Any reassurances or encouragement to look up falling on deaf ears and before long she was guiding him through the staff door and up the stairs to the apartment.

He was intensely curious as to who this kid was and why he was here but he'd have to wait until the lunch rush was over for answers unless he wanted Pigsy to bite his head off.

He did notice that on occasion though that the staff door would crack open a sliver and a pair of anxious eyes would peer out to apparently check that Pigsy was still where he was supposed to be though.

It was also hard not to notice how tired Pigsy looked.

The last time he'd seen the bags under his eyes that dark had been back when he had been studying part time to get some of the qualifications he'd missed at school, in addition to some business related courses. He genuinely wasn't sure how he'd managed to pull it off while working full time but he had and the various congratulation gifts he'd received from regulars still had a place of pride up on the shelf behind the counter.

A heavy sigh pulled his attention away from his laptop and he looked up to see Pigsy leaning against the counter, clearly taking a breather.

"You doing alright, Pigsy?"

He stood up straight with a sigh and started tidying up as he responded, "Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Just been one hell of a week."

Concerned, he asked, "What happened? Sorry, I never even asked why you were shut last week - are you and your grandmother alright?"

Pigsy waved away his apology, "As if you had a chance with all that fortune teller BS... But yeah, we're both fine. I can't go into details but just know you'll be seeing MK around a lot for the time being. His parents are old family friends and they're really going through a tough time at the moment so we've offered to babysit short term. Speaking of which..."

He started pulling out various ingredients to make a snack for the kid and he couldn't help but envy the fact that he was going to be eating so well the entire time he was here. Obviously, that didn't make up for whatever was going on in his home life but damn, did he wish he could get some of those dumplings Pigsy was making.

He forced himself to stop looking hungrily at the food in Pigsy's hands and instead ask, "What happened?"

Pigsy shot him an annoyed look, "What part of "I can't go into detail about it" did you not get?"

Not quite having believed he wasn't actually going to divulge the details, he pouted, "Seriously? Why not? Oh, wait! Do I know them? Are they regulars? Oh! Or are they famous somehow? Is that why he's got such a weird name? To protect his identity?"

Admittedly, he was just a bit of a nosey person by nature but there must be a good reason that Pigsy couldn't share any details with him.

Bizarrely though Pigsy looked oddly embarrassed and a little defensively he bit out, "What's wrong with his name?"

A little incredulously he retorted, "You ever heard of a kid called MK before?" He then pointed at the bottle of MK brand oyster sauce behind Pigsy, "Seriously, did they just name him after the first thing they saw?"

Cheeks red, Pigsy crossed his arms and blustered, "Obviously they didn't. That's just a coincidence. His real name is just... too long and... foreign to bother with! His, er, dad, uh... studied in France! Fell in love with the place or whatever and gave his kid some fancy French name."

Doubtful, he asked, "So what's his actual name then?"

Pigsy turned away as he continued to put together a snack for "MK", "Can't pronounce it."

He crowed, "You're taking care of this kid and you can't even say his name?"

Pigsy immediately got in his face and shushed him, glancing around the restaurant at the other customers and finally at the staff door before hissing, "Keep your voice down! See, this is why I'm not telling you shit about what happened!"

He pushed Pigsy out of his face before whispering in disagreement, "Oh, come on! I wasn't that loud! And as if I would start shouting about something like that! The kid isn't going to hear us from upstairs!"

Even if he was sitting just out of sight behind the staff door, he still wouldn't hear them over the thrum of conversation that currently filled the restaurant.

Pigsy refused to see reason however, "I'm not taking that risk. Kid is traumatised enough as it is."

Well, he didn't really feel he could argue against that. The silence, the staring and the nervousness suggested, to him at least, that something really was up with the kid and he supposed he couldn't really blame Pigsy for being super wary of that. And honestly, it was almost impossible to get Pigsy to change his mind in anything - if he'd decided he wasn't going to tell him, there was no way he was going to be able to convince him.

Maybe he'd get the full story once the kid left for the day.

So, making sure his displeasure was known, he conceded, "Ugh. Fine. I guess it's none of my business anyway."

Pigsy huffed, "You should try having that attitude more often."

The conversation moved on.

He had long since secured the right to remain in the restaurant while it was closed between the lunch and dinner rushes and so he was here to witness the way MK almost immediately appeared and latched onto Pigsy as soon as the last customer disappeared out the front door.

Xiùyīng followed at a much more sedated pace but where he raised an eyebrow at the clingy behaviour, she looked incredibly fond.

Pigsy himself looked a little awkward about the whole thing but inevitably he just sighed and patted his head before grabbing the food and trying to usher him over to a booth, allowing the boy to sit close as he ate.

Pigsy asked him a range of yes and no questions about what he'd been up to and MK nodded and shook his head enthusiastically where appropriate. Xiùyīng occasionally chiming in with more detail and trying to encourage MK to speak up and do the same.

He didn't seem nearly as unsettled as he had this morning and he was quite proudly showing Pigsy the drawings he'd been working on and apparently there was an interesting addition.

Pigsy snorted and handed one of the drawings back to MK before nudging him, "You want to go show Mr. Tang what you've drawn?"

He'd really rather not be involved in this whatsoever but his desperate motions behind MK's head were ignored and he just had to accept his fate when the kid shyly made his way over and handed over the drawing for his appraisal.

It really wasn't anything impressive but he could more or less recognise what everything was supposed to be and it wasn't a stretch to believe that the man with the giant glasses and the laptop was supposed to be him.

The slightly menacing aura coming from the booth really wasn't necessary - he had nieces and nephews, he knew how to handle this situation. He made the appropriate amount of fuss and MK really seemed to brighten under the positive attention, running to grab the rest of his drawings to show him.

Xiùyīng couldn't help but marvel, "He's really taken a shine to you."

He really didn't have anything to say in response to that so he'd simply laughed awkwardly and told her about his experience with his brothers' children.

Eventually, MK and Xiùyīng went back upstairs and he couldn't help but smile as he commented, "He is a pretty cute kid."

Pigsy shrugged, "So everyone tells me."

"Can he not talk at all though?"

Pigsy hesitated for a moment, before offering, "Well, he's not spoken since he's got here but everyone seems pretty sure he will speak eventually."

Curious, he asked, "Who's everyone?"

Pigsy snorted and turned away from him, "Nice try."

He sighed and smiled ruefully, "Can't blame a guy for trying."

It wasn't unheard of for him to spend the entire day at the restaurant but after several, increasingly dramatic messages from Mǐnyǒng telling him he was close to starving to death, he decided to pack it in about dinner time.

Takeout in hand, Pigsy stopped him before he could leave pointing him towards the staff door where a nervous looking clung to Xiùyīng while sadly waving goodbye.

Jeez, this kid.

He returned the wave and then perhaps a little louder than normal thanked Pigsy for the food and told him he'd be back on Wednesday. He had no idea if MK would be here then but he seemed to look a little less distressed to hear he was coming back.

As he walked back home, it was hard not to speculate on MK's situation, it really was bizarre the more he thought about it, but he could theorise all he liked there was no way of knowing the truth. He was still holding out hope that he would find out once this whole thing blew over though.

But he wondered how long that would be - how long was "short-term"? A few days? Weeks? Surely not more than a couple of months?

He guessed he would just have to wait and see.

--Chapter End--

A/N: MK still shows up at Pigsy's door as per canon but that's on a need to know basis right now.

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LMK Fanfic Masterlist

[troybarnesbabygirlconfirmed]

hey!!!! so, im making a social media edit and like my friend gave me a prompt. its britta and abed talking sh*t abt jeff but i haven’t seen the show in like AGES so idk how to do that, so do you have any ideas on how they would do that? (asking since youre a writer)

LMAO okay my thoughts:

britta and abed know jeff the best of any character beside the dean because he reads jeff’s emails

jeff and abed relate to each other personality-wise a lot so i think the bulk of them starting to talk shit about him (when you talk shit with someone, you usually dont wanna get too offensive too fast) would probably come from his appearance because britta finds abed’s insults on appearance most funny

probably would start with them insulting his forehead and move past that

britta would insult how his daddy issues make him bitter and hateful and probably also his “cool” guy mentality, she would probably also talk about the way he is in bed.

(depending on how canon you want this to be, abed would probably either listen patiently or agree… 😏)

abed would probably go for jeff’s tendency to bottle up and explode as well as the “im so awesome” act, although he’d probably be the first to say he truly does see jeff’s insecurities and how they play into his current personality

britta could also start going off on his fear of commitment but i feel like abed, having some issues with close partnership himself, might not be as responsive.

i’d probably make britta talk more than abed does because britta’s anger tends to escalate and make her hyperverbal whereas abed’s anger is very sharp but generally contained.

ANYWAYS THIS IS A LONG RESPONSE HOPE THIS HELPS

[roo-bastmoon]

The old fashioned way...

Might not do any good but doesn't take much effort to write letters, send emails, and post tweets.

To: support@weverse.io

My message, in case it's a helpful template:

My name is [redacted here] and I live in the USA. I am a member of WeVerse and have a paid ARMY membership subscription.

I will be boycotting WeVerse purchases and publications and encouraging other fans to do so until you issue an apology for your extremely damaging, insulting, and offensive feature article titled "Morgan Wallen is the Most Wanted Man in Music."

Not only does your article reduce being a white supremacist to being "a troublemaker" and a "mischief maker" while also making other problematic statements (what exactly IS "traditional White American values" and "the celebration of white culture"?), but you also denigrate the achievements of two of the world's best artists--Park Jimin and Min Yoongi of BTS.

Jimin has not had "some partial success in breaking up [Wallen's] domination"--he has made history as the first Korean to get a #1 on Billboard's Hot 100 and #2 on Billboard's Global 200, despite only 9 days of promotion, 2 music videos, barely any advertisements, delayed playlisting, split streams, deleted views, culled sales, and his songs never being sent to radio. 

 Agust D did not "jockey" for first place but was "unable to topple One Thing at a Time from its pedestal." Once again, Billboard culled the sales it counted and instead favored American artists' paid radio-play, but almost no news agency is willing to publish about this topic. Instead, Agust D has had the highest grossing tour of any Korean soloist in US history. It took Morgan Wallen EIGHT WEEKS to achieve the sales Min Yoongi did in just one week, but nowhere do you mention this in your love letter where you call this racist white man a "breath of fresh air" and "the most wanted man in all of pop music."

I am so deeply disappointed in your "journalism" and frankly disgusted that you would speak of Hybe's own exemplary artists this way. It smacks of sabotage for the artists and contempt and disrespect to the fans. I genuinely feel ashamed to be a paying contributor to WeVerse now. You have truly lost the trust and admiration you might have enjoyed from so many millions of ARMY and K-pop fans.

I have to wonder if WeVerse would even still exist without BTS. In any case, I will be boycotting all WeVerse purchases and publications, and actively campaigning for other fans to do the same, until you issue an apology and learn the proper way to handle sensitive issues around race in America and the music industry--without minimizing K-pop artists' contributions to music. I have no idea what you gained from publishing something that promotes a person like this and diminishes the achievements of people with actual talent, but you certainly are going to lose a lot of your original core audience as a result.

Do better.

-[name redacted here]

[weverse membership number redacted here]

[strangertheories]

Firstly, I'm not trying to cancel Millie! A lot of her Brenner love is just a result of her close relationship with Matthew Modine so she wants Eleven to like him because she likes him in my opinion, based on the context of her also saying she loves Vecna and Angela. This was also ten months ago and she wasn't trying to be offensive but a few people have asked me what she said in reference to this post, and Millies quotes were:

"Y'know I think people really wanna label it like "oh my gosh is Will?" It doesn't matter, y'know? At the end of the day, what's so nice is that in this day and age, it's 2022, we don't have to label things. It's ok to not know, it's ok to be confused, to be going through it and that's what Will is. We don't have to label it, I think the friendship of Finn and Noah prevails on screen, we get to see that beautiful friendship come alive and if that's romantic then that's for Will to discover. That's a story I think that everyone should take away from Stranger Things is that it's ok to not know."

Which... Yes it's ok to not know your sexuality but the issue is that Will definitely does and Millie said this very very soon after Noah said Will was 100% gay, hence why her saying he's confused came across very weirdly. And also saying it doesn't matter is different when you have an unlabeled character vs when you're refusing to explicitly call a gay character gay.

In reference to the Brenner stuff, first she said that he was the saddest death in the show and she later said he's a character everyone hates but she adores. And said if she could pick a character other than El to be her fave, she'd say Brenner because she's "a good daughter". I cannot find the clip of her calling Brenner her dad over Hopper annoyingly, but I have found my text messages about it from July of last year. I'm sure other people can reply to verify that I'm not making this up, just that the search function on TikTok and Tumblr is broken.

So yeah, I love Millie a lot, but her opinions at conventions are truly something lmao. Don't get angry at her please! It's also important to remember that pre-volume 2, Noah was also saying the stuff about Will having no label but later clarified he had to for spoiler purposes. Millie might just have missed that memo, she has spoken in the past about ignoring long emails from Netflix saying what she can and cannot say.

[gamersonthego]

GOTG Review: Hypnospace Outlaw

This is the next game in my Backlog Roulette series, where each month I spin a wheel to randomly select a game on my massive backlog that I must play (though not necessarily to completion). These wheel spins occur on the monthly preview episodes I co-host with my friends on The Casual Hour podcast.

Both of my parents were educators at my elementary school (they're retired now.) Mom was a 3rd grade teacher and Dad taught gym. They both would stay after classes were over to work on lesson plans or grade papers or move equipment, and I got to freely choose which one to spend time with before we got to go home. With Dad, I would mostly practice free throws in the gym (though I never got any good at them). But with Mom, I’d often get to play on her computer (when I wasn’t watching Digimon Adventure on her classroom TV.

That was probably my first real experience with computers. I’d play things like Oregon Trail II (the best one, by the way) or an awful typing program called PAWS featuring a freaky Cheshire-Cat-like mascot. But sometimes, I would load up Netscape Navigator and just poke around on the late ‘90s internet. 

I hated this cat so much as a kid.

I only remember bits and pieces of that time online. A Sokoban block-pushing puzzler, a Super Mario Bros. fan game with all-new levels, some first-person hovercraft racer that had multiplayer LAN capabilities (I’ve never been able to find that game since, it’s definitely not Hover! by Microsoft.) a fansite for the Sonic Underground cartoon. Even with my fragmented memory, I remember the joy and adventure I had just digging around. Anything could be around that next corner, and that was half the fun.

Hypnospace Outlaw is the closest I’ve ever come to reliving those formative computer experiences. Set in an alternate 1999, you are thrust into Hypnospace — an internet stand-in that’s part GeoCities and part forum chatroom — and are asked to moderate and police this online Wild West. 

Developer Tendershoot has nailed the tone and aesthetic of this era. The highly compressed bitmap images, the way pages auto-play (incredible) music when they load, the terrible, terrible fonts, the fileshare servers that are completely inscrutable unless you know exactly what you’re looking for — it’s all just perfect. And it’s not just Hypnospace. The game has its own little desktop computer experience complete with email, virtual pets, a download manager and more. It reminds me of Cibele or Her Story, but much more freeform and robust. But all that is just aesthetic —  the game itself is pretty cool too. As a Hypnospace moderator, you’re given little jobs as you explore the various pages and zones of the browser: Take down some copyrighted material here, censor some threatening speech there, find some lost files that are hanging around…somewhere. Some of these tasks just require you to pay close attention to the pages themselves, while others force you to put on your hacker cap as you cross reference ID codes with unlisted pages, crack passwords or decrypt files, all while a corporate conspiracy bubbles up around you. 

It’s truly satisfying to use your online sleuthing skills to their fullest. And whether you’re stopping a virus from breaking the virtual world or just banning a kid who can’t seem to stop making offensive webcomics, you just feel this sense of power.

In many ways, Hypnospace Outlaw the platonic ideal of the concept of late-90s computing. I do wonder if that hyper-specific aesthetic and mechanics gives it too narrow of an audience, but as someone who is part of that narrow audience, I found my experience with it to be incredibly fun. And it’s one I won’t soon forget.

[crosby-interesting]

Monika Caryk to this day swears she didn't do anything to Melinda. Melinda claimed she had to have a protection order against Monika but it turns out that order never existed, Monika then said in court that Melinda was the one who suddenly started excluding her from team dinners and get togethers and stopped liking her posts really suddenly. She said she did take offense but she never attacked her, she then says that all the wags started emailing her and telling her they were disgusted and didn't want her near them Essentially Monika has her evidence that clears her name, she and her husband Mike offered Erik the evidence and he basically told them to fuck off. A IT (information technology) person was then hired ot looked at the comments/posts Melinda alleged Monika made and based on IP addresses, places and times, they were found to NOT be connected to Monika's accounts in any way, no possibility. When Erik and Melinda found about the IT reports they filed some complaint in court that barred Monika from being able to publicly post her evidence/clear her name All together it was just a big big mess and I feel horrible for Melinda and her having to endure this while losing her son, same for Erik of course. But part of me really feels horrible for Monika because she to this day gets harassed about this and she legally can't say a thing despite her having her set evidence to clear her and her husbands name. I just don't feel like she did it, I truly think they were just really mean trolls. The wags had been excluding her for a while and Melinda then being the captains wife joining in wasn't the best.

consider that I'm in Monica team

[sunder-the-gold]

Imagine making meals because your hobby is cooking, but you have to stay in the kitchen and don't get to see into the cafeteria where the food is served to the people.

In a restaurant like AO3, the hit counter tells you how many people walked into the restaurant. But ONLY that much.

It doesn't tell you how many people immediately walked back out because of the smell.

It doesn't tell you how many people tried some of your food, but found it so mid (middling, unremarkable, boring) that they left without even bothering to insult or criticize it.

It doesn't tell you how many people liked it and read all the way to the end.

Kudos tells you that someone liked... something. Was it the appetizer, the main course, or the dessert? Did they love the appetizer only to walk away without a word because the main course displeased them?

Bookmarks aren't much more informative than Kudos. The reader may rescind them if your work takes a truly offensive turn for their tastes, but that's assuming they even remember they have a bookmark feature.

Number of subscriptions is a little more informative, since people can get emails about updates, which might get them to remember to unsubscribe. I confess that there are a few fanfics I keep getting notifications about for YEARS because I intend to return to them 'eventually' but I don't feel like catching up on them 'now'.

A comment on the latest chapter is, by far, the clearest sign that someone probably read ALL of the story up to that point.

A comment is also the only way that a writer can learn what their audience loved or hated about the execution of the story.

There's not much you can or should do about people who don't like the SUBJECT MATTER of your story. At least as long as you tagged, labeled, categorized, and summarized it properly.

But just because you're writing what you and a lot of other people want to read, doesn't mean you can't want to improve the WAY you write about that passion.

what the whole "please comment on fic you like, it will encourage more writing" vs. "fic writers shouldn't be writing for engagement and validation" debate fails to really grasp, for me, is that comments shouldn't be boiled down to "engagement and validation" in the first place. by which i mean: comments aren't payment for a service, they are communication and connection. they represent the audience reaching back.

i don't write just for myself. are you kidding me? the point of storytelling, to me, is to present certain narrative arguments and produce or encourage an emotional response to them. That communication is essentially useless if there's no endpoint, no listener. To me, there is no point if I'm not communicating with someone. When I write, I am talking to a reader. If you've read anything I've written, then I was talking TO YOU.

you are well within your right to consume fic as ~content~ and withhold your "payment" out of a sense that the writer should be satisfied at having created anything at all in an unresponsive void. but please be aware that it feels really good when you talk back.

[funnybunny-boy]

I posted recently about this but I have an old sanders sides fanfic that I don't think I'll ever update, but the chapter is like 10k words long and deserves to see the light of day imo.

So Please enjoy! LMK if you think I should continue and I probably maybe could potentially consider it possibly

cw(s): death, description of dead body, horror (though idk if its super scary)

Brief Summary: Logan is a broke college student down on his luck, when his strange roommate Janus offers him an unconventional job opportunity that for whatever reason he decides to take.

Poltersides

Chapter One: Olga Baine

Death falls more commonly than fortune rains on good people. Anyone on this cursed planet would have more luck dying in some way unnatural than winning the lottery. And money is the world’s most offensive oppressor; if you cannot afford your hospital bills, you will just have to die. If you don’t like someone, and you’re rich, you can have them killed, pay for a cover-up, and continue living among the rest of Earth’s population, like some kind of evil doppelganger. Having no money is the worst punishment of all; you live at the mercy of anyone more fortunate than you, hoping, on the streets you are doomed to live on until maybe someday you could find refuge, that they may assist you. But people are rapacious and uncaring; they want more, and you become their very inspiration to keep on getting.

Granted, Logan was not homeless, but he did wonder why college had such steep, outrageous prices. And God forbid his family, of whom he no longer had contact with, was considered “almost first-class citizens”; as if their dependent hands could ever bear the burden of having no cigar to warm them. No matter how many times they wrote on their applications his family would never grant him a mere peek at their fortune, no more than four merit-based scholarships were granted to him, despite how desperately he required the need-based scholarships. Luckily, his intelligence got him just barely enough scholarship money to be able to attend the Levin College of Law, but if they could not place in the top 5% of their class, they could lose money.

With how competitive scholarships were becoming, it’s as if college is preparing you to see the world as some sort of battlefield; there’s not one person you can trust. Always expect everyone you encounter to have some sort of ulterior motive, and if you get hurt, then it’s your fault for getting close. Friendships are just a necessary means to an end goal of success; while Logan disagrees with most of the implications of the previous teachings, he did see no point in forming close bonds with his peers. Why would he sacrifice his time to study and finish his work, just to go out to eat low-quality food and purchase clothing he’d never wear? Perhaps he didn’t truly understand what friends spent their time doing, but if it was anything like he imagined, it couldn’t be worth his time. So in the end, Logan planned to live their college years friendless, so they wouldn’t be wasting any time with people who did nothing to benefit them.

This plan, of course, did not account for the fact that, as a freshman at his new school, he was going to be required to stay in a dorm; which meant he would have a roommate. Someone they would have to get along with if they didn’t want to be miserable at the end of class each day. Even as they unpacked their belongings and made their bed, Logan could only dread the moment their roommate arrived. Could he forget about his pride long enough to engage in a mutual relationship with someone relatively unknown to him? He knew very little about this person; Janus was their name. They were indigenous, specifically Seminole. Their family had raised them on a reservation, and after attending public school and their local community college, they decided to continue into law school. In their email exchanges, they also mentioned they had an unconventional job but didn’t disclose any of the specifics to Logan, other than they would travel a lot and be gone late at night.

There were other small details Janus had shared about themself; they knew they were nonbinary at a very young age, they had vitiligo (which had been one of the first things Janus shared, as evidently they had troubles in the past with people freaking out due to their appearance, but Logan hadn’t minded), and they had a fondness for snakes. Logan hadn’t felt the need to share much about himself beyond his motivation to work as a criminal justice lawyer and his enjoyment of reading. The two had gotten along fine over email, but Logan couldn’t be sure the two would get along in person; what if Janus was messy? Logan couldn’t stand disorganization. What if Janus brought a significant other over? Logan didn’t think they could handle having visitors; having a roommate was already asking a lot of them.

So when Janus had finally arrived, Logan was taken aback. Firstly, their vitiligo had affected almost the entirety of the left side of their face, but Logan knew this. What did surprise him was Janus’s attire; it wasn’t nearly as formal as Logan would expect a law student to dress themself in. It was very casual, almost entirely black. Despite being in Florida, they even had a sweatshirt on. Logan supposed it would have been worse if they hadn’t been wearing loose-fitting shorts, but the black fabric definitely wouldn’t have done much to protect them from the heat. Logan would have felt concerned, had he not shut down the feeling, as concern may lead him to assist Janus in some way, and that could lead him down the very path he sought to avoid: friendship.

“Salutations. Do you require any assistance in unpacking your belongings?” Not waiting for any sort of response, Logan took the heavier of the two bags from Janus, setting it on the bottom bunk of Janus’s bed. The two had somehow wound up with a three-person dorm rather than a two-person dorm, but neither was going to alert the school, as that just meant they had more space to place their belongings.

“Thank you, Logan. And, oh, I just love the space blanket; most certainly not a childish choice for someone as…’mature’ as you are.” This made Logan pause. He hadn’t expected Janus to be quite so sarcastic so immediately. So maybe Logan had seemed offended at the comment, and Janus had quickly noticed. “Not that it’s a bad thing, no, of course not. It adds charm.”

Logan wasn’t sure if it was meant to be a compliment but thanked them anyway. “I suppose I appreciate you trying. More importantly, however, I don’t think you have much room to be judging my bedding.” As he spoke, he held up a bedsheet covered in cartoon snakes.

“Well aren’t you quite the detective, Mr. Simmons? I don’t really think I asked you to look through my bag, but if you’re going to do whatever you want, do be a dear and take out all of the bedding, won’t you? I have so much clothing to unpack, and I’d just love to do the work all by myself.” So Janus wasn’t the kindest person Logan had ever met, but they were certainly well-spoken enough that Logan didn’t find themself itching with the urge to correct them anytime they spoke. People nowadays spoke with such atrocious grammar, and often Logan wondered how the school system had failed such a large population.

“Alright, I don’t mind helping you out; although, since you are more experienced with the campus, I’d appreciate it if you would assist me to pick up my textbooks, as I haven’t had the time,” Janus responded with an indifferent shrug, and Logan supposed they were agreeing, grabbing the bedding and climbing up to make their bed for them, remembering Janus mentioning they preferred the top bunk in one of their email conversations.

“The brightly patterned blanket goes directly after the sheets; also, if it’s not too much to ask, please make sure the yellow comforter covers the pillows. It adds to the faux rich kid aesthetic I’m going for.” Logan was, admittedly, a bit confused as to why Janus wouldn’t be rich, since, from his research of Seminoles he had done to avoid offending Janus, he found out they were a very wealthy tribe. He didn’t ask, however, and finished arranging the bed to fit Janus’s specifications. After climbing down, they returned to their side of the room and continued working to fold their clothes and put them into the wooden dresser that sat next to their bed. He only brought formal clothing and had enough ties to designate them into their drawer.

After the two roommates finished moving into their dorm, they traveled together to the university’s bookstore; Logan had pre-ordered his textbooks, and now it was all a matter of picking them up. On their way there, they came across a food stall. Janus had already purchased a vegan hot dog, but Logan didn’t have any sort of cash, either on him currently or back at their room, so he had to go without, not allowing Janus to pay for his meal. And then again, once they had arrived at the bookstore, Logan had their textbooks in hand and happened upon Hamlet on one of the shelves. Despite having looked for Hamlet for a while now, they could not afford to purchase the book; he supposed he would just have to watch Ophelia again to satiate his admiration for the story.

“You know you can’t just keep going around without any money, correct?” Janus said after Logan again rejected their offer to purchase the novel for him. “I happen to remember you mentioning you came to this school since you live nearby; why then, may I ask, have you not considered a job yet?” The two stopped their walk back to the dorm to sit down on a bench just outside of the bookstore.

“I have tried a multitude of options; the fast food places nearby are not willing to hire someone with such a busy schedule as a law student, and I am unable to drive myself somewhere away from campus as I do not have my driver’s license,” Logan said this with an ashamed expression, picking at the bottom of his black polo shirt.

“My family didn’t own a car since my aunt was willing to drive us, but she also refused to teach me, so I didn’t exactly learn either. I just use my ‘bestie’ Patton for free rides.” Janus paused for a moment to think, and then continued, “speaking of which, if you need a job, I’ve had no conflicts with my workplace other than the odd day trip or two out of state, and the professors have always been so kind as to allow me to do the work online while I’m away. If you’d want I could get you an application.”

“I’m not sure I follow; your workplace has you traveling out of state? What could you possibly be doing that has you traveling so far, and as a college student no less?” Logan said, no longer tugging at his shirt but instead fiddling with his hands.

“Well, I had previously mentioned that it was...unconventional. You seem like a sensible person, Logan. Such a sensible, intelligent young man like you should have no business in dealing with work like mine. Do you think you can handle it, Logan?” Janus begins to lean in, staring intensely into Logan’s eyes, “Can someone as grounded in reality, someone such as you, even begin to handle the truth of my work?” Logan has to strain themself from rolling their eyes.

“Is it really necessary for you to act so cryptic? You’re being rather extra, Janus.” Logan pushes Janus away from him by pressing his pointer finger against their forehead. “Let’s just return to the dorm. I’ve been unpacking all day, I’m exhausted, and I’ve simply run out of patience for frivolous nonsense.” Logan pushes himself up onto his feet, and begrudgingly Janus follows.

“Well, you certainly know how to have fun,” Janus grumbled, and Logan just ignored them as the two continued on their journey back to their dorm. He didn’t need to listen to his mad roommate ramble deucedly about their secret drug ring or whatever it was that kept money in their wallet. That was the only reasonable conclusion Logan could come to— their roommate was involved in crime. Even law students are becoming criminals nowadays, Logan supposed, and they’re only taking this course as a cover-up. He had never quite had experience with any criminals before, but certainly, this is how their minds work; do anything you can to cover up your heinous acts of malfeasance. Despicable.

Perhaps then, Logan decided as they lay in bed, his point has been proven—friends would do nothing for him. Maybe there had been a sliver of hope that Janus and himself would get along, but he certainly could not imagine himself convening with a criminal. Trusting other people was as nugatory as daylight television, and Logan would never involve himself. There were more important things for him to do, anyways. He had class the next morning, he had to continue his job search, there would likely be homework for him to do. There was simply no time to waste.

…

Law and literature are attached like comorbidity; to comprehend the law, you must comprehend literature to maintain certain ways of thinking that are creative, synthetic, exploratory, open to ambiguity, and accepting of ambivalence. At least, that’s what the course description had said when Logan had signed up for their classes. Not that it mattered right now, as the only thing on Logan’s mind was just how hungry they were beginning to feel. They hadn’t eaten a significant meal since Tuesday, and Thursday was already well underway.

They couldn’t exactly remember what class they had already taken that morning, something about the First Amendment, but the pains in their stomach were starting to compete with their attention span for the current class. They had a meal plan, but they knew going into college completely broke would make eating every single day a very dangerous idea. It was probably for the best that he used this meal plan sparingly, and besides, he wasn’t exactly starving quite yet.

It was undeniably distracting, of course, but that was okay. He had packed small snacks for his dorm room, and if he was truly having this much trouble focusing, it would be easy enough to grab a snack before he started studying. But that would have to come later; Logan had to pay attention to this lecture if he wanted to get good notes, and if he didn’t get good notes, then he couldn’t get good grades, and if he didn’t get good grades, then he couldn’t keep his merit-based scholarships. He really wanted to continue his education at this school, but without his scholarship money, he knew he’d have to drop out.

Money. It had always seemed to cause nothing but problems in life; why is it that you only deserve to live if you can afford to? Why do the wealthy get to do such morally reprehensible things while good people live on death’s edge every waking moment? If your worth is based solely on your income, then how many poor people could have changed the world that simply did not have the funds to do so? And why is it so often that poor people can only survive by committing crimes, and while the rich can commit as many misdemeanors as they want, a poor person will be imprisoned for stealing a snack?

Ultimately, money was both Logan’s driving force and his biggest limitation. He was going into criminal justice to stop petty arrests against people who were only trying to survive, but could he afford to do so? This is all just to say that Logan was beginning to realize, only on their first day of classes no less, that money was a much larger problem than he previously thought it to be. And after class, as they made their walk back to their dorm room, they started to genuinely consider calling their parents and pretending that their homosexuality was indeed “just a phase” so they might take pity on them and assist them with their costs after all. He was interrupted from his thoughts when Janus caught up with him.

“So Logan, is there a particular reason you spent a majority of class just spacing out and holding your stomach, or is that normally what you do to pay attention?” They said, and Logan could hear the smirk in their voice. It would have been irritating if he weren’t experiencing such strong stomach pains, so he simply glared and tightened his grip on his backpack strap.

“Normally I would ask you not to mock me, but currently I am in too much pain to spare any energy on something when I know you will continue to ignore me and do as you please, so I will just ask this; what do you want?” He hadn’t meant to be so short with them, but it seemed he did have some energy to be annoyed after all. His mention of being in pain did seem to surprise Janus a bit.

“Well I did just happen to spot you from afar and we seem to both be going to the same place, but that’s not really important to me now. Why does your stomach hurt? I know one of our neighbors has some aleve, or a heating pad if that’s what your problem is-”

“I am not experiencing menstrual cramps, nor have I ever. I’m just hungry, that’s all.” Logan said, and once again held onto his stomach as a sharp pain jolted through him. “I appreciate your concern, but I have some nutritious snacks in our room that I plan to indulge in when we return.”

“When did you last eat?” Janus said, clearly suspicious. “And don’t lie; I am an expert in that field, so I’ll know right away.” Not that Logan had planned on it, but he went ahead and answered truthfully, as the two entered the dorm and sat on the bottom bunk of Janus’s bed.

“It has been a couple of days since I’ve had anything sufficient to eat, I’ll admit. But really, it’s not a problem, I’m simply trying to save my meal plan funds.” Logan said, and now Janus was looking at him as if he were some kind of idiot. Was it so difficult to believe that he didn’t want to use the money from his lackluster meal plan so quickly into the semester? Besides, their blueberry granola bars were more than enough to keep them going enough to finish their work.

“And you decided to just come back and pretend that you’d be fine living on, what, a couple of granola bars?” So maybe Logan did sound kind of stupid. “So you refuse to order food from a cheap hot-dog stand, you can’t afford a $10 novel, and now you can’t afford to use your meal plan?” Saying it so harshly with the cross of their arms and a concerned glare certainly didn’t make Logan feel any better.

“I really don’t appreciate that you seem to be judging my lack of funds,” Logan said, and as he began to reach into his bag to presumably ignore Janus for the remainder of the night, Janus grabbed his wrist. “If you’re going to continue to ridicule me I’m not in the mood-”

“I’m sorry.” This prompted Logan to shut up and pull back from his bag, but Janus still didn’t release his arm. “I didn’t mean to come across that way; I know I can be very sarcastic, but I am genuinely concerned about your health. And I know I was very cryptic regarding my place of work, but it’s very simple work and pays very well. Would you at least hear me out? You can’t just go to class starving, Logan.” Logan found it hard to believe that Janus would so easily reveal their place of occupation, but with both hands now grabbing at his wrist with an almost pleading face, he sighed and fully turned his body to face the other.

“Well firstly, I’m not literally starving, seeing as I’m the average weight for my height and it’s been roughly two or three days since I’ve eaten. Technically I have around 19 or so days left to live without food, and I was planning to eat when I got here.” Logan was about to continue, but the way Janus was now glaring with impatience and crossing their arms made him think otherwise. “But fine, I suppose I’ll hear you out, so long as this isn’t some secret drug ring.”

“You really think so low of me that I would be involved in a drug ring? Logan, I’m just positively wounded.” Janus said, and Logan stammered to try and apologize, rubbing his hands together roughly, but Janus just laughed. “I’m kidding, I don’t care. I didn’t mean for you to think I was involved in anything illegal, but it’s just so fun to mess with you.” Logan rolled his eyes but urged them to continue. “I’m not sure if you’ll believe me, but my friends and I work as a group at a ghost extermination center of sorts.”

Logan felt their stomach drop for a minute but quickly assured themself that ghosts were not real and they were just overreacting. If Janus was telling the truth, which they seemed to be considering their tells when lying that Logan quickly picked up on due to four years of majoring in psychology, then it meant they were wasting their time at abandoned houses for money. He wasn’t sure if that was the most preposterous or the most perspicacious money-making plan he had ever heard of. Since ghosts didn’t even exist, he wouldn’t have to do anything at all! It would basically be an extra study hall where he got paid to do homework at abandoned locations.

Then, after a long pause, Logan said, “Tell me more.”

…

It wasn’t a mere four hours later that the two found themselves at what Janus claimed to be the ghost extermination business’s main office building. Upon stepping inside, Logan felt as though the warm Florida air had suddenly vanished, and now he was in a Michigan winter. Perhaps it wasn’t that cold, but the temperature dropped so suddenly that it certainly felt that way. And not to mention how nobody seemed to be working, like there was a company vacation going on. But then why would the door be unlocked? And more importantly, why was there just a stack of applications besides the door? Usually, you would have to ask for one at the front desk, especially in this formal office place.

“Here.” Janus said, handing Logan one of the applications, “I’m pretty sure you just sign your name at the bottom. But if you’ll please do it quickly, so we can make it back to class? I would truly hate to miss out on first amendment law, and I know you have criminal law soon as well.” Logan didn’t quite recall telling Janus about that but thought nothing of it. He knew they were right, so he quickly began filling out all of his information, though there wasn’t much to fill out. There wasn’t an address line, nothing asking about his healthcare plan, and no field regarding his qualifications. He didn’t exactly have time to glance over the application and read what he was agreeing to, either.

All he had to do was sign his name, write a short answer about justice, and what team he wanted to work with if he didn’t want to work by himself, which Janus told him to request Remus’s team. At a glance he saw just how long the list of terms of service were, so he took a picture of the contract with his phone and left the application on the front desk like Janus had told him to do. Then, the two were off again to return to the campus. Logan’s teeth were chattering and his arms were shaking now due to how cold the building was, so stepping outside into the normal Florida heat caused him to sneeze and itch his eyes.

“Come on, our Uber isn’t going to wait for us forever, though I’m certain she’d love to do so,” Janus said, and Logan just stared at them in confusion; they hadn’t gotten an Uber, Janus’s friend had given them a ride. Janus just rolled their eyes and dragged Logan into the car with them. The car was blasting cold air, and Logan was certain his body was going to give up right then and there from the drastic drop in temperature.

“Can you please ask them to turn down the air?” Logan whispered to Janus, feeling too awkward to speak to the driver himself. Janus again rolled their eyes, reached forward, and turned down the air. Logan mumbled thanks and leaned back into his seat, holding himself and staring forward as the car drove off.

“Since you’re going to work with us soon, and didn’t want to talk on the way here, why don’t you introduce yourself, Logan? Don’t worry; Patton won’t bite.” Janus whispered, and Logan glared at them. If there was one thing Logan despised more than the almost patronizing tone Janus gave him (though he understood that Janus was a very sarcastic communicator and didn’t take it to heart), it was talking to new people. “Or Patton can introduce herself first.”

“I’d love to!” The plump person in the driver’s seat said, wiping some of the sweat off their forehead since the car has (admittedly) gotten warm since Logan asked for the air to be turned off. “My name is Patton, I prefer she/they pronouns, and...I love cats! But I’m severely allergic to them, and I live in a pretty run-down apartment so I don’t really have a safe place to keep any if I could. Speaking of which, my roommate Virgil is also going to be working with us! They’re at work right now or I would’ve asked them to come with us.” The name Virgil seemed familiar to Logan, but he didn’t comment on it.

“Where do they work, and why are they working for a ghost extermination business if they already have a (much more sensible) workplace?” Logan asked, still not relaxing his hold on himself, though he was twirling a strand of his hair on his left pointer finger due to a nervous habit.

“They haven’t exactly told me where they work, but I do know they run a small business downtown. His boyfriend doesn’t even know what it is, and he tells him everything.” Patton said, and Logan was extremely thankful that Patton was such a chatterbox. He might even get away with not talking...is what he thought until Patton continued with, “now why don’t you tell me something about yourself?” Damn it.

“I’m Logan Simmons, and I use he and they pronouns since you mentioned that. I...like to read?” They figured that was a safe enough option. Nothing too specific to be embarrassing and nothing too unrelatable that Patton would immediately dislike them. “I especially like Hamlet by Shakespeare, but I prefer to read murder mysteries.”

“Shakespeare! Our friend Roman, who’s also going to be working with us, loves plays. Shakespeare wrote plays, right Jan?” Janus nodded their head, and Patton smiled brightly. “Virgil also spends a lot of their time reading, though it’s always something on their phone and not a physical book. He also likes to listen to books on some book-reading website. I don’t remember what it’s called though; something about audio? Or was it sound...soundible? But anyway, we’re here now! Have fun in class and I’ll see you two tomorrow night!” Patton said and put the car into park, smiling somehow even bigger and waving the two off as they exited the car.

“Isn’t she lovely?” Janus said, watching Patton drive back off to their shared apartment. Logan shrugged noncommittally, fiddling with his hands. “Hey. I know I’ve only known you for a couple of days, but I can already tell you don’t like new people. You don’t even have to participate in any conversations when we go to work; Virgil talks so little they might as well be mute, so there’s nothing to worry about. Now get to class; wouldn’t want to be late, would you?” Janus smirked to cover up any hint of concern they may have had on their face, and walked in the direction of their class.

Logan watched after them for a moment and then began to walk to his class, trying to let his brain catch up with the exhausting afternoon of socializing he’d had. He could only hope that his other coworkers wouldn’t be quite as talkative and that he could just be by Janus the whole time since, against his better judgment, he was beginning to trust them. Trust, even, was a strong word for someone who carried themself with such a sarcastic demeanor; but they could at least say Janus had not done them any harm yet, and that was all they could ask of them.

He hadn’t even realized he had arrived at class until he sat down, taking out his notebook and trying to pay attention. Keyword: trying. They kept wondering if accepting the job offer was the most auspicious move they had made. Logan knew Janus wasn’t lying that it paid well since they had shown Logan the physical paycheck they had yet to cash in. It wasn’t even a matter of trust, he was just scared about meeting new people. From the small bits of information Janus had shared, and what he heard from Patton, these people were very eccentric, with Brobdingnagian personalities, especially compared to his calmer nature.

He never got on well with extroverts, and most of them seemed to be such. He hadn’t even made small talk with anyone on campus who wasn’t Janus and tried to make himself uninteresting enough to keep it that way. He was too nervous to even read a book in case someone else happened to know it and tried to ask questions. But it was too late for him to turn back now that he had received a text from whom he assumed to be his boss confirming his employment. He couldn’t exactly say he was surprised at the lack of interview since the application was so bare, but he couldn’t quite say that he remembered putting his phone number onto the application.

…

It was finally time for Logan’s first night of work. Janus had walked him to the same building, though this time they were at the garage in the back. Their coworkers were already there, and Logan was sure they could hear their heartbeat ringing in their ears. He rubbed his hands together anxiously, the sweat from his palms moistening the tops of his hands. They were all just as intense as he expected them to be, but one of them stood out in particular.

Other than being the tallest person there, they looked like they came straight out of a hot topic in the early 2000s. Their hair was shaved on one half, and the rest was dyed a deep purple, save for one strand of magenta and black stripes. Their clothing was also mostly black and purple, and he even notices a fishnet undershirt poking from underneath their black crop top. What particularly stood out though was his eye color; they had a remarkably unique case of heterochromia, with one eye being purple and the other being green. He had only ever known one other person with that specific set of eye color, but it had been years since Logan had spoken to them, and he wasn’t about to ask this stranger any questions. Or talk to them unprompted.

Everyone else seemed to have no problem making conversation, though. The emo didn’t seem to be talking a lot, and Logan remembered Janus saying something about a friend of his not talking frequently. Virgil, he believed the name was. He couldn’t imagine them rooming with someone as seemingly soft and sweet as Patton, but he did have only 1 conversation with Patton, so maybe she wasn’t all that she seemed. Speaking of Patton, she was walking to a large gray van, carrying boxes of what Logan assumed to be ghost hunting equipment with another of their coworkers.

The first thing Logan noticed about this coworker was how muscular he was. He wasn’t the most ripped person Logan had ever seen, but his athleticism was apparent to them. He had a confident posture, and Logan felt themself tense up more. If there was anything Logan hated more than strangers, it was confident strangers. Never in their entire life had Logan met someone who was the living embodiment of confidence that wasn’t a complete asshole. As if they weren’t nervous enough about going off on some nonsense job, they were dealing with a douche. Great.

Even worse than muscle guy was the final coworker, and it looked like it was his sibling. If muscle guy exuded confidence then this bastard was the most intrepid person Logan had ever laid his eyes on. They also wore a fishnet undershirt, just like who he assumed to be Virgil was, whom this guy was practically attached to at the hip. He did remember Patton mentioning that Virgil had a boyfriend, so this solidified the emo’s identity in Logan’s mind. Green guy, as Logan decided to call him since his wardrobe was entirely green and black, was the loudest out of everyone there, and every other word out of his mouth was some sort of profanity. Now Logan wasn’t the most judgemental human being in the world, but was it necessary to drop the f-bomb in every single sentence? There were much more intelligent ways of communication, anyway.

“Oh, hey Logan! It’s nice to see ya actually showed up,” Patton said, startling Logan into jumping out of his skin. “I was carrying the equipment into the van, and I can tell ya don’t really wanna stand out here with the gang, so if you want you can come in and help me organize it a little?” Logan could feel their brain itching to correct Patton’s abhorrent grammar, but anything was better than hearing green guy yell obscenities and feeling themself shake with anxiety.

“Of course Patton.” The two walked side-by-side into the van, and Logan was almost impressed by how spacious it was. There was a large storage shelf beside the entrance, and Logan was reminded of a Uhaul. There were boxes filled with various equipment on the floor, and Patton picked one up and sat it on a desk, which had a computer and various cameras sitting on it.

“If you’ll start unpacking the other box, that’d be swell. The EMF scanners-the yellow remote thingies with 5 little buttons that light up; those go on the second to last shelf on the bottom. The flashlights go on the shelf above, and the parabolic microphone goes on that bottom shelf with the D.O.T.S. projector.” It felt as though Logan were intruding on a foreign language class taught by a fifth-grader, but they did as asked and put the equipment in their proper place on the shelf closest to the entrance, while Patton unloaded her box onto the shelf right next to the desk.

“...I don’t know how any of this equipment works,” Logan admitted. Patton only let out a light-hearted laugh, patting Logan on the shoulder. Logan felt his face warm.

“Hey, you’ll be fine. Janus is so smart with all that equipment stuff, and you two already get along well enough, they’d be happy to help you out! Or, and this is only a suggestion if you wanna try and be friends with the rest of the gang, Roman’s also pretty good with it?” Patton flashed Logan a big smile that they could tell was going to be a familiar sight, and Logan just shrugged noncommittally.

“I don’t wanna bother him, but if he’s okay with it, then I guess it’s fine. Which one is Roman?” Logan asked. Please, they thought to themself, whatever deity might be out there, do not let Roman be the muscle douche. Or green guy. If God were to show mercy, let me have guessed the emo’s name wrong.

“Oh, he was the one helping me carry the boxes!” Logan was reminded why he was an atheist and had to hold back a groan. At least it's not green guy, Logan thought to calm his nerves. “He loves meeting new people and has been dying to talk to you since you’re new and all.” Even worse, he’s an extrovert. It seems Logan would have no luck getting his criminal law homework done, so he made a mental note to finish reading Pride and Prejudice instead.

“I’m flattered. Is there anything else you need me to do?” When Patton said no, he followed them outside to the others, who seemed to be getting ready to get into the front of the truck where they would be sitting. From a glance, Logan could see there was just enough room for everyone to sit. There was also a window that allowed those in the front to see into the back of the truck where all the equipment is. Logan then realized how cramped the seating part of the truck was, meaning he’d have to be very close to his coworkers. He could only hope they wouldn’t try and make conversation with him because that would be-

“I’ve seen you before.” Logan felt like he had jumped 1000 feet in the air when he felt the warm breath on his ear from the emo whispering to him. He turned and stared at them with wide eyes, fear coursing through his body. The emo also looked somehow just as anxious, and even guilty. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you. I’m Virgil. I didn’t want to be weird, and I was going to say my name first, but that just kinda…came out? I’m sorry.”

“It’s quite alright, Virgil,” Logan said, feeling their breathing calm down, and Virgil seemed less tense at that. “But yes, I do believe we went to elementary school together. I didn’t think you’d remember me, though.” Virgil gave them a small smile.

“We didn’t talk much, but you were always dressed really fancy. I thought you were weird.” Logan choked, and Virgil had that guilty look on his face again. “Fuck. Sorry, I meant like. A memorable weird? Shit that’s not… never mind. You stuck out a lot to me. I’m surprised you remember me. I didn’t really talk to anyone, especially not the cool rich kid Logan Simmons.” Before Logan could even begin to dignify that with a response, green guy was yelling at everyone to get into the van. Virgil rushed to his side, and the two sat in the back.

If there was one way to attract attention, Logan thought at least, it was by volunteering yourself to sit in the front. So he wasted no time sitting in the back, right behind the passenger’s seat. Unfortunately, in the middle was green guy (just my luck, thought Logan), sucking face with Virgil. At least, Logan thought drearily, they’re focused on something else that isn’t me. Patton climbed into the driver’s seat, with Janus in the middle and Roman ascending into the van right after. Patton started the van, and after a couple of minutes of getting settled in and triple-checking that everyone’s seatbelts were buckled (seriously, what a parent friend), they were off.

Logan had his book ready to read, but after only 5 minutes of driving remembered how carsick he felt when he tried to read and ride, so he had to put it away. If there’s one thing he definitely did not want to do in front of these strange people, it was throw up all over their van. Granted, he doubted they were the owners of the van, but still. He resorted to staring out the window, taking deep breaths to calm both his nerves and his stomach.

“Hey, dork.” Green guy leaned right into Logan’s space, and for what seemed like the hundredth time that day, Logan felt himself twitch in surprise. Damn anxiety. “Y’trying to take a nap? That’s real boring. Why don’t you talk? Virgil doesn’t talk a lot, but they were talking to you earlier, so why aren’t you talking now?” By now, most everyone (except for Patton) was staring back at Logan, though Virgil was kind enough to drag green guy out of his face, but that didn’t lessen the spike of fear that struck through Logan.

“They’re probably scared to death because you’re sitting next to them, duke of hurl,” Roman said from the front seat, already turned back around, clearly annoyed with his brother. Logan hadn’t heard him talk so far, and was surprised to hear an almost regal and refined tone to their voice. This guy just oozed confidence, and if Logan wasn’t so busy hating him for it, he might find it attractive.

“I won’t bite,” green guy said, and that made Roman turn back around to glare right at his face. “Okay, maybe I will bite, but who doesn’t love a bit of tension?” Roman scoffed, and then turned his gaze over to Logan, this time a much more sympathetic look. And god if Logan couldn’t just stare at those green eyes for hours…to think about how much he hates this guy’s arrogance.

“Remus is stupid. You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to, especially not to him.” Remus, Logan knew now, made a mock noise of offense, harrumphing and turning its attention to Virgil again, leaning into them and muttering something about how awful his younger brother was. “Grow up,” Roman said, and turned back to Logan, “anyways, my name’s Roman! Pat said you wanted me to help you learn how to use the equipment, so we’ll stick together tonight.”

“I’m certain he wanted you to share that with everyone, Roman, definitely not embarrassing at all.” Janus quipped the first thing they’d said all evening. They weren’t wrong, either; Logan’s face was practically on fire from a mix of anxiety and embarrassment. He was gratified when the van came to a stop, and everyone unloaded, making their way to the back of the truck, joking around with each other, just a happy little friend group Logan realized he would never fit into. He’d have to consider resigning, but that was future Logan’s problem.

“Here, baron bespectacled, you can have this EMF reader and a camera,” Roman said, tossing them to Logan, who just barely caught them. There was a reason he majored in psychology, not kinesiology. “They’re the easiest things to work in the whole van, and they’re really important, so you can learn and be helpful at the same time.”

“Is not the purpose of me being here to help ‘eliminate’ the supposed ghost? Unless I were to just sit in the van and do my work, which your rudeness is inclining me to do, there’s no way I could use any of the equipment without inherently being helpful,” Logan said, feeling his nervousness manifest into annoyance. Roman seemed taken aback that Logan had actually spoken, but just rolled his eyes and grabbed what appeared to be a thermometer, UV flashlight, and another camera.

“Roman, be nice,” Patton said, grabbing a file Logan assumed contained information about whatever ghost they were supposed to be hunting. “Her name is Olga Baine. She died in the late 1800s and was suspected to have been murdered by her husband after some sort of argument. She tends to be more active when visitors are in pairs of two, so we’ll stick with our usual partners, only Logan’ll be with Roman this time, which works out.” Patton spoke about some other tasks their boss wanted them to complete; getting a picture of ghost activity, having the ghost step in salt, and whatever else.

“Well, let’s get to work, glasses gay,” Roman said once Patton dismissed everybody, and they were all off in their separate directions. Remus went around the back with Virgil, and Janus walked with Patton into a side door. Roman handed Logan a radio so they could communicate with the rest and dragged him to the front door. “It’s going to be freezing in here, so if you need to grab a coat, we have extras in the back,” Roman offered.

“I think I’ll be alright,” Logan said. Roman said nothing and opened the door, Logan quickly realizing his mistake. It was like the building had several air conditioners all on their maximum settings. Logan shivered, forcing his teeth not to chatter. Roman rolled his eyes and took off his crimson jacket, handing it to Logan, who took it graciously.

“I’m naturally warm-natured, so I’ll be fine. Now, take your EMF reader. See the little indent? That’s the button to activate it, so you’ll need to hold that down for it to turn on.” Logan did so and was startled to hear it begin beeping. Two of the five lights turned on, signaling that the entrance of the house had an EMF level of about 2.5 MG. Logan remembered reading that the average house had an EMF level of about 0.6 MG, so this intrigued them.

“We’re going to keep walking through rooms to find the ghost’s main room. That’s the room where we’ll have the best luck talking to the ghost, so we must find it fast if we want to get home before midnight,” Roman said, fidgeting with the thermometer to turn it on. “Hopefully this ghost’ll be easy and the room will have freezing temperatures.”

“You wish to find a room that is even colder?!” Logan said, exasperated. Roman laughed at that, and it was one of the most pleasant sounds Logan had ever heard. Until he remembered who it was coming from, and he scowled. “Is it really so humorous that I find it illogical to want to be even colder than we already are?” Roman once again rolled his eyes, and Logan felt a brief violent impulse surge through him. He was beginning to resent those serene, forest-colored eyes.

“Who’s the experienced one here, Loganardo de Cringey?” Logan huffed at that but knew Roman had a point, so they didn’t say anything. “The ghost room is the coldest and will usually have the highest EMF level. It’ll make this a lot easier if we can get both freezing temperatures and EMF level 5, that’ll narrow down two of our three ghost indicators.”

“What do you mean by ‘ghost indicators’?” Logan asked, and Roman reached into his pouch that was attached to his belt, holding out what appeared to be a journal. He turned to a page that showed a list of ‘ghost evidence’. He noticed a few different types of evidence, and sure enough, a level 5 EMF reading and freezing temperatures were included.

“On top of extermination, we’re also trying to determine what type of ghost we’re dealing with. I’m not entirely sure why it matters, but it earns us a lot of extra money, so I don’t really mind playing detective.” Roman guided Logan to the kitchen as he spoke, pulling out his camera to capture an image of the dirty sink water, which Logan vaguely remembered Patton mentioning during their earlier spiel. The EMF level had been going between one and two, so he assumed that the kitchen was not the ‘ghost room’. He still couldn’t believe he was entertaining the idea of paranormal activity, but whatever.

He followed Roman into a bathroom connected to the kitchen, and immediately jumped out of his skin when the EMF reader screamed at him, all 5 lights turned on. Roman cursed under his breath, and Logan assumed it was because this room didn’t feel any colder than the rest of the house. He looked around the room, and the first thing he noticed was how awful it smelled. Not that the rest of the house didn’t smell like rotting wood and mold, but this room smelled like sewage on top of that. He felt himself gag, pulling Roman’s jacket up to cover his nose.

“Well look at that specs, you found the ghost room,” Roman said, flashing an overly bright grin, and if Logan wasn’t so focused on holding in what little contents he had in his stomach, he would have glared. Roman pulled his radio out of one of his belt pouches and pressed a button. “Found the room, it’s the downstairs bathroom coming off the kitchen. Nerd-nation found it themself.”

“Well good job Logan,” Patton’s voice cheered over the radio, “we’re trying to investigate the rest of the house now for any fingerprints, is anybody looking through the basement?” Nobody was.

“We can do it if team teen angst can come to the ghost room,” Roman responded, and Logan had never before wanted someone to stop talking quite as much as he wanted Roman to.

“Too scared to stick around with good ol’ Olga, are ya, pissy?” Remus’s nasally voice came over the radio. “Virgil’s on their way now, cause I’m trying to set up the salt in here, so you can go be a chicken and look through the basement now if you want.” Logan so desperately wanted to do anything else; not because he was scared, of course not, ghosts aren’t real, but if the bathroom smelled this terrible, imagine how the basement smelled.

“Alright Logana King, let’s get outta here. I can tell the smell is driving you crazy,” Roman said empathetically, patting Logan’s shoulder. “Virgil won’t give a shit, I mean they’re dating my stupid, stinky brother, so they should be used to bad smells.” Logan almost laughed at that, but didn’t want to lose his lunch, so he just followed Roman to the basement of the house. The entrance was right next to the stairwell that led upstairs, and if they really focused, they could hear Janus and Patton talking upstairs. Ignoring them, the two descended downstairs, and Logan was surprised to find the smell wasn’t any worse; it smelled like mud, but at least it wasn’t the overwhelming smell of sewage.

Taking a quick look at his surroundings, the basement had several shelving units, most of which had old boxes that were falling apart; every cardboard box in sight was moldy and just barely staying intact. He noticed a small closet entrance in the back, but no way in hell was he going in there. If this big open space had fallen apart, he couldn’t imagine how bad the closet would be. At this point, Roman had out his UV flashlight and was scanning the area, when every light, including their flashlights, began violently flickering.

Logan had never felt so much dread take over him at once. He didn’t believe in ghosts, but he wasn’t stupid enough to pretend that this was natural. He found himself being harshly dragged into the closet by Roman, who was definitely panicked, but was clearly trying to put on a face. As Logan suspected, the closet was full of mold and mildew, and they almost preferred the bathroom’s smell to this. They felt Roman shove them onto the closet ground, slamming the door closed and sitting with them.

“What’s-” Roman covered his mouth, his glare burning through Logan’s soul. Aside from hearing the old basement lights flicker with a vengeance, there was a weird splashing sound from upstairs, and Logan realized it was definitely coming from the upstairs bathroom where Virgil was. He felt his entire body tremble, which turned into shaking. Roman pulled him into a tight embrace, gently rubbing his back to try and soothe him.

“We’ll be fine, Logan. We’ve never been in any actual danger before, I’m sure the splashing upstairs is Virgil trying to get a picture of more dirty water. We’re just hiding because in our ghost hunting guide, whenever the lights flicker, the ghosts are angry. Hiding will calm them down and stop them from destroying things.” Roman was surprisingly good at calming them down, and all at once, the lights came on, and the house felt warmer. “See, Virgil found the ghost, and they exterminated her.”

“How exactly do you exterminate the ghost?” Logan asked, the uneasy feeling still with him despite his trembling being gone. “I really haven’t had a chance to read the ghost hunting manual, and I didn’t suspect I’d need to since ghosts aren’t real.” Roman guffawed at that, helping Logan to their feet.

“Well, I can tell you myself ghosts most certainly are real, but whatever you think specs,” Roman said, walking them out of the closet. “But anyway, each ghost has a prized possession; usually some sort of jewelry, maybe an entire secret room if you’re really unlucky. You have to destroy that object. By doing so, the ghost loses their connection to the physical world and ‘ascends’ or whatever the stupid book said.” The radio beeped, and Patton started walking.

“Is everyone okay? Me and Janus didn’t find anything upstairs, and since the ghost is gone now, we should regroup,” she said, and everyone quickly affirmed that they were alright over the radio. Well, everyone except for Virgil, that is. “Virgil? If you’re nonverbal right now, just turn on the radio and tap something, okay?” Nothing.

“Babe, come on, I know you’re trying to freak out the newbie, but you really gotta tell us where you are, okay?” Remus said. Still not a word. “Okay, we’ll meet you in that bathroom, just stay there. You’ll be fine, I promise.” Logan didn’t think Remus was capable of being so soft after the few times they talked, but it was almost endearing. Almost.

Logan followed Roman up the stairs, his nerves strangling him. Virgil would have responded if they were okay, Logan was sure of it. From what little conversation they’d had, Virgil didn’t seem the type to just pull pranks, though of course Remus would know them better. If he said they were fine, then surely they would be fine. Roman seemed to notice Logan’s anxiety and gave him another pat on the shoulder, walking through the kitchen with him and into the bathroom to the most horrific sight they had ever seen.

Virgil, kneeled over the bathroom, their left arm limp and holding a broken necklace, likely from the ghost. Their hair was half in the tub, soaking wet. Their body was facing away from the door, but Logan didn’t have to see their face to know what had happened. It felt like all of the air in his lungs had been stolen from him all at once. Virgil, someone they had known about since they were kids; sure, they weren’t very close, but they knew them. This was somebody who lived in his memory bank since he was a child, and now, he would never make any new memories with him ever again. All of his senses shut down, like he was frozen in place.

It wasn’t long until everyone else came in. If Virgil wasn’t already dead, they might have drowned with all of the tears that were being spilled for them. Remus was instantly by their side, desperately clinging to their corpse, perhaps hoping it might bring them back, but it was far too late. In his numbness, he vaguely registered someone-likely Roman-sobbing into his shoulder, with such terror that it shook Logan to his very core. This brought Logan back, every single one of his senses crashing down on him like a lightning strike. Roman was just barely able to help him over to the toilet before he lost his lunch.

Nobody said anything. There wasn’t a word that could bring Virgil back, so there was no point in speaking. They silently agreed that they couldn’t just leave them here, so Remus and Patton carried them into the back of the van, laying them on a cot by the desk. Remus left his dark green trench coat with Virgil, being unable to stomach seeing their bloodshot eyes a second longer. It felt like hours had passed in between Janus helping Logan clean up and everyone getting into the van to leave, but somehow they were already on the road.

If Logan had felt alone before, when everybody was happy and just hanging out with friends, he felt absolutely isolated now. All he could do was lean against the door, holding his own shaking form. Everybody else was quick to help each other in their own ways. In Virgil’s normal place sat Roman, there to comfort his older brother. Patton barely stopped crying enough to be able to drive, so Janus was gently guiding them through the motions and reading the map for them.

It was about 10 minutes into the drive, when Logan remembered he hadn’t yet read his contract for the job. He decided to pull out his phone and do just that, thinking that maybe they’d be given some kind of access to therapy if they experienced a loss on the job. Just some sort of compensation for what they had all been put through would be enough to console him for now. But, as he read on, he felt his shaking worsen, almost like he had been possessed. He was only distracted from his stupor by a knock on the window that allowed the front and back to see each other. He turned around, and there was a sudden, overwhelming noise, which he later learned to be his own scream, and the van swerved over to the side of the road, parked.

Virgil looked back in from the window, completely alive and unharmed.

[educationtech]

Digital skills: definition and importance - Arya College

The job search process has changed in the past decade. That means the skills you used to find a job in high school probably would not work today because the landscape of the entire workforce has evolved. It is essential for 21st century graduates of top engineering colleges in Jaipur to master basic digital literacy skills in order to survive and thrive in a digital world. In many cases, you cannot even get your foot in the door without being somewhat digitally fluent.

Whether you are aware of it or not, you flex your digital muscles on a daily basis. Every time you send an email, log in to your Facebook profile, download an app on your smartphone or conduct a search query on Google, you are exercising your digital literacy skills.

Career experts have shared some tech-savvy tips and tricks that can help you land the job of your dreams. Some of the most popular skills are as follows:

1. Do some research to familiarize yourself with the landscape

It is important for the students of best engineering colleges to get acquainted with the specific career field in which they are interested before embarking on your job search journey. Doing a little homework will give you a realistic idea of what to expect when searching for a position in this industry in your area. Utilizing digital tools to familiarize yourself with specific job titles, education and experience requirements, salary expectations and some of the top companies in the industry will lead to a more productive job search. You will be armed with precise, relevant and up-to-date information.

2. Google yourself

According to the research conducted by best engineering college in Jaipur shows that 48 percent of employers will use Google or other search engines to research job candidates. It is believed that prior to any job hunt, you should be well aware of what anyone with a computer can find out about you in just a few clicks. That way you can be prepared for any uncomfortable questions that may arise down the road.

3. Give your social media profiles a professional makeover

Hiring managers check out applicants’ social media pages. They conduct a full audit of your social media pages prior to beginning your job search. Remove any inappropriate photos or offensive comments. Once students of engineering colleges polished their profiles, think twice about future posts and updates, knowing future employers may be watching.

Creating professional profiles is not just about deleting things either. Consider adding information that highlights your unique skills and interests. Join industry groups or communities that align with the profession you’re pursuing. Not only will this help you stay up-to-date and connected with your peers, but employers will see that you’re truly passionate and committed to your career.

4. Use advanced search features in Google

Google is more powerful than any job board website or classified ads, you just have to know how to use it. There are certain Google search tricks that can help you in your job search. For instance, pretend you are looking for an accounting job. You might type “accounting jobs in Minneapolis” into the Google search bar. This will provide you a decent start to your job search but adding a few extra keystrokes can provide you with a much more precise list of results.

5. Set Google alerts

Another way students of BTech colleges Jaipur can leverage the power of Google in your job search process is to set up Google alerts. This means you will receive routine notifications whenever a specific phrase or keyword is mentioned on the web, letting Google do the work for you. Setting up an alert is easy. Simply visit the Google alerts webpage and enter the key phrases you would like to follow.

Creating an alert means that anytime a company posts a job opening whether it is on their website, on a job board or on LinkedIn, you will be one of the first people to know about it. Google will email you a list of any new mentions that relate to your alert.

6. Cyberstalk your dream employers

Chances are good they have some sort of online presence. Nearly every company has a website and many maintain a presence on Facebook, LinkedIn or Twitter. Just because a company is not hiring now, it does not mean they would not be in the future. Following, liking or joining their social communities is a great way to keep a close eye on their hiring behavior. Not only will you be notified when a job posting is listed, but you will also learn the ins and outs of the company, which could result in some very impressed interviewers if it comes to that point.

Use the aforementioned LinkedIn tricks to identify the hiring managers at these companies and follow their social media activity. A few comments or retweets may be just enough for them to remember your name down the road.

Conclusion

You now have a handful of handy tips up your sleeve to help you navigate your upcoming job search. Do not be intimidated by the digital nature of today’s workforce. Instead, embrace it and take advantage of the technical tricks at your fingertips.

[fraemlingg]

im just gonna freestyle this text so this is not gonna be very thought through or whatever but literally i am so incredibly sick of social media i am sooo sick of that ugly AI slop everywhere and algorithms and ads and everything being designed to keep us glued to our screens no matter the consequences

i am sick of monetarisation i am sick of posting my art online literally begging for people to like my posts in hopes of being able to make at least a lil money with my art one day it feels like im selling myself out and its so fucking far from authentic like im a tattoo artist and so i follow a bunch of other tattoo artists and although they all have such amazing unique styles everything feels so performative and i KNOW that every single one of them feels the same and its so fucking sad that we cant really do anything about it

and im not trying to sound pretentious but i?? kinda hate meme culture?? it pisses me off?? can we not have normal inside jokes anymore why are 10 people sending me funny little posts even though they know i will not look at them (and like rlly truly no offense bc i know they do it bc they love me and think of me and i love them for it and i appreciate it in one way or another im not being judgy rn thats not my point). i want to write letters not dms but i feel like if i were to say that i might be called "cringe" which yknow is a concern i already expressed in another post and might be a me-problem but as ethel cain said it so fantastically nothing is taken seriously anymore and i hugely blame social media and meme culture

and like pls keep enjoying ur memes im again not judging just speaking from my subjective experience and that experience is that it caused me brainrot im not sure i'll ever be able to fix and that SUUUUCKS dude we all got dragged into phone addiction without a fucking choice and it will just get worse and worse and worse

i watched LuvstarKeis youtube video on why you should make a website and i think they (i looked everywhere for their pronouns sry if i got it wrong ;w;) have such good points i rlly enjoy their youtube videos in general. so yea in the long run i think im gonna create a website (or two to separate tattoos n music), post it to instagram with a statement, and then im gonna "leave instagram". putting that in "" bc im gonna keep my instagram but only so people can dm me for appointments or other things bc i dont wanna give out my telegram and people these days are too damn lazy to write a single email (even dj bookers lol it pisses me off a bit like what do i have this mail for then). like why are people using AI to write emails pls make it stop sometimes we have to do things that are inconvenient and that is actually a GOOD thing my fucking god, same thing goes for physical media like dvds nd such like fuck streaming services but thats another topic for another day

im probably gonna keep posting on my priv instagram just bc like. theres so many photos on there from so many years ago that would probably be lost if i deleted that account nd like i go on there like every 3 months or so to dump my photos there and then i log off so whatever. i am mostly pissed off about sharing art on social media and feeling so unauthentic about it and being glued to my phone when i could do so many other much better things liKE UGHHHHHHH

i think dead internet theory is scary and depressing but lowkey i hope the internet is actually dying bc i am so sick of this internet society. i am so goddamn sick of everyone being addicted to their phones. remember when we had a life like?????? how did we end up like this

i also wanna get a flipphone one day but yea i gotta plan that shit

i just needed to vent i could probably go on for ages about this but imma choose to shut the fuck up now

[bogleech]

Yes it is American Psycho and the funniest part is that the scene isn't overtly any more sexual than anything else in the movie even if admittedly it's a pretty horny movie in general

The reason the various murders aren't here is that as you can see it is only the "Impudence/Hate" category. The categories are Wanton Violence & Crime, Impudence & Hate, Sex & Homosexuality, Drugs & Alcohol, Offense to God, and Murder/Suicide, in other words they spell out "W I S D O M." In every category a movie had 100 starting points and loses 1 point for every offense. American Psycho is actually one of only four films to ever get an absolute 0 alongside Freddy vs. Jason, Scary Movie and Sin City, while the only non-Christian film to ever retain all 100 points in every category was Mary Poppins.

The actual purpose is supposed to be strictly to list things he thinks might be a bad influence on children, which makes it weird that he even bothered reviewing movies like American Psycho. I think he did it mostly for the sake of completion, comparison and because people bring teens to R rated movies anyway. When I was around maybe 13-15 this guy became a weird hyperfixation where I'd troll his email and rag on all his opinions, but decades later the only thing I can still say I hate is his ridiculous degree of homophobia, this was from The Birdcage:

But the sad thing is, I now realize he wasn't a chud and wasn't even "conservative" about anything else by our current standards, I mean, some other things he truly HATED to see in film was any glorification of guns, war, or police brutality, callousness towards the poor, discrimination towards the disabled, casual racism, and even displays of "insensitive parenting." He was not okay with people ever hitting their kids, or in fact ever even talking down to or dismissing the feelings of kids. A thing he says about Pooh's Heffalump Movie is actually kinda touching, (even if he forgot Kanga's name)

Like this is a really sweet outlook, it's just too bad that his "rational explanations" to a child would have also included "because god says it's evil." :(

CAPALERT was a Christian website that used to analyze movies and list out every single "offense" kind of like the bible-thumper version of doesthedogdie but there's one movie I had no idea they ever covered

[yhwhrulz]

Worthy Brief - November 19, 2024

Pass the grace, please!

John 1:17 For the law was given by Moses, but grace and truth came by Jesus Christ.

Having spent over 20 years living in Israel's Negev Desert, I've come to appreciate the importance of salt in maintaining proper hydration. "What in the world does salt have to do with grace and truth?", you ask. Well, I'll tell you.

Salt, as you might recall from chemistry class, is a combination of sodium and chlorine. Sodium is a harmless active element, while chlorine is a toxic gas responsible for bleach's unpleasant odor. Yet, when these two elements combine, they form salt—a substance widely used to preserve food and enhance its flavor.

In the same way, if we present the truth of the Gospel without grace, it often produces a very offensive and sometimes poisonous effect on those with whom we share it. However, if we combine the two, we'll be be able to preserve and bring out the delicious flavor of our faith!

Grace and truth came by Yeshua HaMashiach (Jesus Christ), the scripture says. How much more should we approach the world around us with these two important components?

Are you finding it challenging to share the Gospel effectively? Maybe you need more grace—or perhaps more truth. Let’s give our efforts to the Lord and ask Him to spice it up the way He likes! It’s harvest time! If we share the gospel full of grace and truth, we will surely reap a hundredfold!

Your family in the Lord with much agape love,

George, Baht Rivka, Obadiah and Elianna (Melbourne, Florida)

Editor's Note: Over the weekend, Worthy News published an in-depth analysis exposing the UN's efforts to influence the global narrative through AI and the media. Shortly after, the article was removed by Facebook. To help our audience understand what’s truly relevant, we’ve launched the Worthy Jail page, showcasing censored news that deserves attention. If you share a Worthy News article and it gets taken down, send us a screenshot—we’ll honor you with a Worthy Facebook Jail T-shirt! Read more …https://worthy.social/worthy-jail/

Editor's Note: Feel free to share any of our content from Worthy, including Devotions, News articles, and more, on your social platforms. You have full permission to copy and repost anything we produce.

Editor's Note: During this war, we have been live blogging throughout the day -- sometimes minute by minute on our Telegram channel. https://t.me/worthywatch/ Be sure to check it out!

Editor's Note: Dear friends — we are going to be heading WEST!!! Now booking in the following states: Alabama, Mississippi, Texas, and Arkansas …. If you know Pastors, Rabbis or Ministry Leaders who might be interested in some powerful Israeli style Hebrew/English worship and a refreshing word from Worthy News about what’s going on in the Land, please let us know how to connect with them and we will do our best to get you on our schedule! You can send an email to george [ @ ] worthyministries.com for more information.

[annaasher123]

UK Digital Marketing Regulations: A Guide to Staying Compliant

A manual to Staying Compliant In today’s fast-evolving virtual panorama, groups in the uk have to navigate various rules to make sure they are conducting advertising and marketing activities legally and ethically. Staying compliant no longer best protects companies from fines, but additionally builds trust with customers. This manual outlines the important United Kingdom virtual advertising and marketing policies and how businesses can live compliant. 

1. The general information protection regulation (GDPR) 

The GDPR, which got here into impact in 2018, is one of the most great data privacy policies. It governs how businesses collect, shop, and use private information. Under GDPR, digital marketers have to make certain that they have express consent from individuals before collecting their personal data, such as electronic mail addresses or cellphone numbers. to comply with GDPR: always request explicit consent from customers for data collection. provide clear facts about how information can be used. permit users to withdraw consent easily. - ensure relaxed storage and management of private information. Failure to comply with GDPR can bring about hefty fines of up to €20 million or 4% of annual worldwide turnover, whichever is higher. 

2.  The privacy and digital communications guidelines (p.c.) 

Percent complement GDPR and in particular regulate digital advertising through electronic communications, consisting of emails, textual content messages, and getting in touch with calls. The regulations mandate that agencies ought to obtain previous consent before sending any direct advertising messages, besides in certain instances like present customer relationships. Key regions of compliance include: - Gaining consent earlier than sending advertising emails or texts. supplying an easy opt-out alternative for recipients. - ensuring call recipients are not indexed at the phone preference carrier (TPS). Non-compliance with % can cause fines and reputational damage. Marketers must often overview their consent mechanisms and replace practices accordingly. 

3. Cookies and tracking technologies 

Cookies and similar monitoring technology play a crucial role in virtual advertising, enabling companies to track consumer conduct and personalize content material. However, below United Kingdom law, businesses ought to obtain informed consent from customers before placing cookies on their gadgets, except for strictly necessary cookies. to remain compliant: Show a clean and concise cookie consent banner on your internet site. Give an explanation for the kinds of cookies used and their purposes. give customers the choice to simply accept or reject non-crucial cookies. Marketers have to regularly assess and update their cookie policies to make certain transparency and compliance. 

4. The opposition and Markets Authority (CMA) recommendations on marketing 

The CMA oversees advertising practices within the United Kingdom, making sure they're truthful and not misleading. Virtual advertising campaigns should follow the CMA’s advertising and marketing regulations, which require that advertisements are trustworthy, not deceptive, and absolutely distinguishable from editorial content. To make certain compliance: Make certain all claims in commercials are substantiated with evidence. - truly label paid or subsidized content to avoid deceptive customers. - avoid the usage of unfair phrases in promotions or contracts with clients. Failure to follow the CMA’s suggestions can result in legal movements, along with fines or regulations on advertising sports. 

5. Advertising standards Authority (ASA) Codes 

The ASA is responsible for enforcing the UK’s advertising codes, which cover all styles of advertising, which include online and social media. The codes are designed to shield clients from misleading, harmful, or offensive advertising. To stay compliant with ASA codes: - Make sure that every claim in ads is trustworthy and can be proven. - avoid offensive or dangerous content, including ads that sell dangerous behaviors. - certainly expose any business motive in social media posts by using influencers or logo ambassadors. Corporations ought to often evaluate their marketing content to make certain it aligns with the ASA’s requirements, mainly while conducting influencer advertising. 

6. Consumer protection from unfair buying and selling policies 2008 

Consumer protection from unfair trading policies (CPRs) is another crucial law that virtual marketers need to take into account. The CPRs prohibit misleading actions and omissions in marketing, in addition to competitive business practices. to remain compliant: Do no longer exaggerate product features or create false impressions. Make certain that any omissions in advertising materials do no longer lie to consumers. - keep away from excessive-pressure sales strategies that might be considered competitive. Breaches of the CPRs can bring about felony motion, fines, and reputational damage. 

7. Highbrow belongings laws 

Virtual marketers have to also be aware of highbrow assets (IP) laws while the use of snapshots, motion pictures, or other content material of their campaigns. Using copyrighted material without proper permission can lead to legal motion. To keep away from IP infringement: always reap permission or licenses for any 0.33-celebration content material utilized in advertising and marketing. - remember the use of royalty-free pictures, motion pictures, and songs in which feasible. - attribute creators nicely when necessary. ensuring that your digital advertising content material complies with IP legal guidelines will guard your commercial enterprise from luxurious legal disputes. 

8. Kid's online privacy safety 

In case your virtual advertising and marketing activities goal or include youngsters, special care has to be taken to conform with United Kingdom laws that protect youngsters’s privacy online. Advertising and marketing to youngsters below thirteen calls for explicit consent from their mother and father or guardians. To make sure compliance: - acquire parental consent for any facts accrued from kids. - Do no longer make the most of children's lack of experience or vulnerability in advertising. Ensure that commercials targeted at children are suitable and do not inspire harmful behaviors. 

9. Nice practices for compliance 

Staying compliant with UK virtual advertising and marketing policies requires non-stop attempts and interest in detail. Right here are a few fine practices to follow: - behavior regular compliance audits of your advertising sports. Train your advertising crew on the brand new policies and recommendations. hold clean information of consent for statistics collection and advertising sports. - overview and replace your privacy policies and phrases of the carrier regularly. Use computerized equipment to manage consent, song compliance, and manage choose-outs successfully. 

Conclusion 

Compliance with United Kingdom virtual advertising rules is essential for keeping patrons agree with and warding off hefty fines or criminal movements. By adhering to the GDPR, percent, and other applicable laws, organizations can make certain that their advertising sports are moral, obvious, and respectful of patron rights. Normal reviews, updates, and personnel schooling are critical to staying beforehand inside the evolving regulatory landscape.

If it feels like wading through a sea of paperwork, not to worry-there are professional agencies like  Digileap Marketing Services that ensure your digital marketing strategy is fully compliant with UK regulations while driving results and growth for your business.