#tru girl friends
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emile-hides · 1 year ago
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The Puddi Shrine
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february-academia · 2 years ago
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28.04.2023
So much happened this week. (In tags I'll rant about it)
N4 is coming and my prep is not at all good. Took a test today and i failed🥲. But i know my prep is soo bad,it was bound to happen. So have to study for that.
College exams are coming🥹 also have to study for that. The dissertation proposal is in the finalising stage,so that's good. But have to work on it properly imo.
Then i also proposed another research study to my professor and he has encouraged me to go for it. So,also have to work on it.
These very cutu plants in the scorching heat were a treat to eyes and mind.
Got this book from the library and I'm really enjoying reading the essays.
( correction in a tag- she scored less than me in class and she was all sad sad. With her i had to suppress my happiness at moments like these)
#here i go#so here in this clg i have 2 friends mainly they are my classmates and one is roomates also so thsi roomate is very toxic i kinda knew it#from the start but ignoted it bcs we became friends when we used to have online lectures and haven't met each other and somethings happened#in which she helped me so i was kinda obliged to stay w her. and after sometime i kinda strted feeling it. all the bad vibes#the toxicity she carry for other ppl judging them on their appearances and whenever i trued to correct her tries to manipulate things#like she jas all of the mean girl vibe but i the clown couldn't just had the courage or ways to not be w her i so wnated to but couldn't#it was all so fucked up and living w her. i changed i started judging ppl. this was so bad. she went through soem toughtimes and as i frien#friend i cared for her i was there for her almost all the times and most of the times whenever i needed her she was not.#tries to dominate always and the incident due to ehich I'm writing all this is - I'm not earing well properly well from past month she know#and last sunday i was very excited to this dish and i wanted to take more and she said very rudely how much more will you eat? i said i did#not had lunchand almost didn't eat the ehole day what's yhe nig deal abt it why tou saying and stopping me like that and she said i did not#say it she said again i did not say it with that rude voice like she can never be wrong and ppl wjom i rarely talk to have noticed that#I've lost weight but she who luves wirh me almost all the time do not know it whom I've talked to abt this don't knwo it . i didn't have#any appetite after that i just stuffed the food unsideand went outside wiyjout syaing anything 8 wanted ro puke so bad i controlled my#i couldn't beleive what just happened i didn't try to talk to her and she obviously wouldn't bcs of teh ego and then there's another friend#and classmate of us and she has a great bond w her then after taht incident she is also not talking ro me and. avoiding me in the corridor#making me feel like I'm the onw wrong here and thwse 2 ppl were not on talking term a week ago again ego calshes this other girl didn't#so yeah i got snakes here#now I'm all alone but this feels great literally like yes i cried and couldn't sleep bcs even tho i knew they are not always what they show#they were the only obes here i was able to form a bond with ( i hate this part so much now)and i care abt friendships alot but it ended#they are not talking to me I'm not talking to them. but thus whole thing made me free now I'm free i don't have to wait for them everytime#i want to go to library or to a class or to a walk bcs they wanted everything to be done in a grp#and I'm going everyday out to study to walk and to jyst peacefully live bcs now I don't have to deal with negativity and toxicity anymore#i feel myself again my trye self who was kind to ppl who wanted to just study quietly in evening who wanted to just go in class on time#i don't have to feel that if i di this will she judge me I'm feeling free with what I'm wearing I'll enjoy and celebrate all my wins#and achievements of the last year bcs i couldn't even enjoy those when i was with her just bcs she didn't got less tahn me#I'm smiling more nad I'm loving more myself to actually avle to come out of thsi spiral i didn't even know i could so yay#listening to you're on your own kid in loop and it made me so happy#that's it done. there was so much to say ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh hope you got some idea of what's happening in my life#sending you all love and light and if you find urslf in somesimilar situation or any difficulty rn hope you get out of it very soon<3
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jackinalex · 1 year ago
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I would also like to point out in Jack’s 2023 Photo Dump the only person he responded to was Alex… he didn’t even reply to his own sister 🥹🥰🥹
Literally!!!!!! He will always reply to Alex no matter what. Like that is his favorite person in the world. 🥹🥹🥹🥹
Jack’s theme song.
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vanishintoyou · 10 months ago
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also gonna be soooo insane for a minute re:prev post. not me looking at the helsinki gp like 👀 and going hmmmmm 👀
#i MAYBE will be acting so unwise when i finally get my residence permit from an eu country like#girl where's the money. yes you can now go to other countries but money where#also time where too probably........ but it's a future problem#🗒#also i say/think all this but i would feel way too guilty to actually spend money on 'not essential' stuff there lmao#especially since im already feeling guilty abt Still not getting any scholarships or anything#literally . worst person ever award for me for wanting to study abroad in this economy . i suck#but in the long run it will be fineeeee we all gotta escape this hell somehow#sometimes i think abt and like aw maybe it wouldnt be So Bad to stay here huh#but then it feels so overwhelmingly. suffocating#feels wrong to let go of this chance when i have it. but also makes me feel extremely guilty#bc like. what's so special abt me why do i get to do this selfishly asking support from my family#while they're still here and im there and . you know it feels so selfish but i Am always a little selfish#and . i shouldn't think too much abt it#anyway today my friend asked me if i ended up staying there and we were both 30 and she was still here#would i marry her to get her a citizenship too and sjjsjejejrjfuekkskdufuf#yeah i should stop feeling guilty and start feeling thankful that i can try this experience ............#it's tru actually. never thought abt it like that i guess....#still feels like somehow impossible that i Will actually get this experience like lmfao#i should probably sleep
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yanderedrabbles · 3 months ago
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Yandere Bisexual Best Friend
Male Yandere x Fem Reader He just wants what's best for you. If he has to tell a few white lies now and again, then so be it.
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When you first saw him, he had his tongue down your boyfriend's throat.
It sure as hell would not have been the start of a friendship, except...
He was the one who ran after you when you stormed out of the club, mascara and eyeshadow running in silvery streaks down your cheeks.
He was the one who hugged you and apologised and said your boyfriend was a piece of shit for doing that to you.
He was the one who got you home safe, cleaned off your makeup and left aspirin on your bedside table.
In your half haze of alcohol and tears, you clung to him and nuzzled into his neck and told him you were so grateful, that he was such a nice guy.
It wouldn't have been the start to a friendship and maybe it shouldn't have been. But you called him the next morning.
You apologised for being such a mess, stuttering just a little at the deep gruffness of his morning voice. He laughed and told you not to worry about, that you should've seen what a fool he made of himself when his boyfriend cheated.
You weren't sure how, but a phone call turned into lunch together. Both of you just a little tipsy from bottomless mimosas, his arm tossed across the back of your chair as he sketched out the horror of his last situationship.
"So you're gay?"
You should have noticed it then - the way he narrowed his eyes just a little, the way he let his fingers graze your bare shoulder, the way he seemed to take just a second too long to answer.
"Yeah. I'm into guys."
That was the first lie he told you. Not entirely untrue. He was into guys.
He was just into girls too. And he was especially into you.
He could have been honest with you, he could have told the truth. But you were still reeling from your boyfriend's betrayal, too guarded and hurt to let another man into you life.
And he so desperately wanted to be a part of your life.
The next time you asked him to hang out, you were so at ease. You hugged him when you saw him, your tits squished against his chest. You held his hand and dragged him along behind you. You fell asleep with your head on his shoulder.
He smoothed your hair away from your face and any idea of telling the truth crumbled.
He told himself he just wanted to be your friend. Lord knows you needed one after such a nasty break up. But anyone who looked at you together could tell friendship was the last thing on his mind.
He took you to watch his favourite band performing live and hoisted you up on his shoulder for the encore, his hands inching further and further up your thighs.
He took you to his favourite club and bought you drink after drink until you danced with him, your arms thrown back around his neck and your ass grinding into his crotch. It was only the pulsing neon lights that kept you from seeing his hard on.
He invited you over for a movie night and pretended to lose the AC remote, just so he could share a blanket with you and keep his arm around your waist.
And the longer it went on, the worse it got. You were cute and clever and funny. You could yap together for hours about fashion and music and video games. You brought him little presents every time you came over - small packets of his favourite sweets, a new flavour of ice cream, his go-to Starbucks order.
Could you blame him for wanting you?
He started calling you his wifey, even in front of his friends. Would crack jokes about getting married if either of you couldn't find a guy by next year. And you went along with it. Ran your hands up his chest and fluttered your eyelashes at him and called him your strong, handsome fiancé - oblivious to the way it made his heart race.
When he walked in on you changing, he kept his face deadpan and told you red was definitely not your colour, even as you scrambled to cover up and spluttered at him to get out.
"Why? You aren't exactly my type babe."
Another lie. Not even remotely true this time.
And soon you got used to him walking in on you. Started asking him for fashion advice while you were in just your underwear and heels. Started asking him to tie your bikini tops and unzip your dresses. You didn't notice him always slipping away afterwards, one hand shoved deep in his pocket. You didn't notice the way his hair was always slightly messed up when he got back, his cheeks just a little flushed.
And if there were ever any warning bells - any subconscious instincts that told you he touched you too much, hugged you for too long - they were drowned out by his parade of boyfriends and flings. Why would he be into you when he could be dating a ripped surfer or hooking up with his personal trainer?
You never realised you were the reason his relationships were always so short lived. He couldn't fall for any of them the way he fell for you. They were all just quick fucks to get the frustration out of his system.
He could have continued just like that - fucking a new guy every weekend and getting brunch with you right after.
But then you went and met someone.
He froze when you told him, his smile a rictus, hand clenched so tight around his wine glass that he was lucky it didn't shatter.
He gritted his teeth and managed to choke out a congratulations. You beamed at him, flushed pretty with young love. You squeezed his hand and said it was only a matter of time before he found his love too.
He had to excuse himself after that. Had to splash cold water on his face and fight down the urge to scream. God, why was he so fucking stupid? He should have made a move on you ages ago, back when you first met. If you rejected him then, at least it wouldn't hurt as bad as it did now.
He somehow managed to make his way back to the table and smile at you like you hadn't just clawed his insides to shreds.
"So when can I meet the lucky guy?"
When you got up to wash your hands he slipped your phone out of your bag. He scrolled through your gallery, over analysing every pic of your new boyfriend. Cute, but you could do so much better. And he wasn't even that much taller than you. God, are you really gonna date this loser?
You kissed him on his cheek when he left and he spent the entire walk home rubbing the spot and thinking up ways to get rid of this new... disruption.
Later that afternoon you called him up and asked if he'd like to come to a bar with you and meet your new man. And just like that, the wild ideas in his head clicked into place.
"Sure wifey, I'd love to come."
He showed up late and spilled a drink down your dress before you even finished saying hello. And while you rushed off to try and get red wine out of satin, he scanned the bar for your new boyfriend.
And when he finally found the bastard, he turned on all his pretty boy charm. Bought him a drink and slung an arm across the back of his chair and pretended not to hear when he said he had a girlfriend. Managed to get the guy flushed and stuttering even after he claimed to not be into men.
When he pulled your boyfriend into a kiss, the fucker had the nerve to actually kiss him back.
He was careful with his timing - going in for a second kiss as soon as he saw the flash of your dress through the crowd.
He pulled away just as you reached the table and looked up at you with oblivious innocence.
"What's wrong baby? Why do you look so shocked?"
Your boyfriend shoved him off and stood up to grab you, to claim he didn't kiss someone else, the guy just came onto him swear to God. But the damage was already done.
Who would you believe was at fault? Your best friend who didn't even know what your new boyfriend looked like? Or the asshole kissing someone else while you were gone?
You threw your drink in your boyfriend's face and called him a filthy liar. When you grabbed your best friend's arm and dragged him away, he struggled to hide his smile.
He took you back to his apartment and popped open a bottle. Poured you a drink and kissed your forehead and let his hand settle on your lower back.
"Men ain't shit baby. We're all just manipulative assholes deep down."
He let you drown your sorrows in the bottle and then pulled you onto his lap when you were too drunk to object.
"I'm the only man you need in your life, yeah?"
You sniffled, too drunk and hurt and dizzy to notice his hands moving to your bare thighs.
"Yeah."
"C'mon, say it. Say I'm the only man you need."
"You're the only man I need."
His fingers slipped under the hem of your dress and he pressed his lips against your skin, teeth oh so close to your jugular.
"And I'll take care of you. So just sit still and I'll make it all better."
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tsukuhoe · 5 months ago
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˙ . ꒷ SHORT N' SWEET .ᐟ.ᐟ
⋮ VARIOUS!JJK X READER .ᐟ ֹ ₊ ꒱
𐔌 synopsis ⋮ oh no! new hit popstar, y/n l/n, "broke up" with her situationship due to suspicions of him cheating! no worries though, she's about to release a super hot n' new album dedicated to his bs! short n' sweet! now what happens when this major breakthrough album catches the attention of the famous agency: special grade management?! [+ other celebs]
𐔌 content warnings ⋮ MDNI! female reader, modern & no curse au, social media au, written in 2nd person pov, age gaps, angst, love triangle but with 6 sides, frenemies, reunited friends (more like reunited hook up), friends to lovers, fan x idol, second chance romance, opposites attract, “fixing him” trope, SLOW BURNNN, profanity  & crude humour, micro-cheating/cheating, heavy references to sex, smut, suggestive jokes, “kys” jokes, drinking, smoking, alcohol, mentions of substance abuse, depression & anxiety, YEARNINGGG, PINING— lots n’ lots of pining (ouch), sabrina carpenter’s music is used for y/n & joji’s music is used for geto, warnings may change as the story progresses. "💋" indicates written parts
𐔌 status ⋮  [11/15/24] ongoing, updates (at least) every sunday! taglist closed. please have age indicated on blog! MDNI, you will be blocked lol
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⋮ MAIN CAST  ֹ⋮  ֹPRIVATE ACCOUNTS  ⋮  ֹETCֹ ⋮
01 ⋮ so act like a stand up guy // 02 ⋮ don't prove i'm right // 03 ⋮ walked in and dream-came-trued - [💋] // 04 ⋮ who's the cute guy with the wide blue eyes // 05 ⋮ everyone rolls their eyes // 06 ⋮ i know i have good judgement // 07 ⋮ when they act this way i know, i got em - [💋] // 08 ⋮ now he's thinkin bout me // 09 ⋮ holy shit // 10 ⋮ please please please - [💋] // 11 ⋮ heartbreak is one thing // 12 ⋮ my ego's another // 13 ⋮ who's the cute boy with the white sweatshirt - [💋] // 14 ⋮ you do something suspect as cute as bye bye // 15 ⋮ i beg you don't embarrass me motherfucker // 16 ⋮ if that was casual, then i'm an idiot // 17 ⋮ make me juno - [💋] // 18 ⋮ isn't that sweet? // 19 ⋮ i can't relate to desperation // 20 ⋮ heard you're back together // 21 ⋮ i don't waste a second, i know lots of guys // 22 ⋮ baby, i know - [💋] // 23 ⋮ he looks so cute wrapped 'round my finger // 24 ⋮ we love to mistake butterflies for cardiac arrest // 25 ⋮ lie to girls // 26 ⋮ cherry-pick lines // 27 ⋮ it's a sign of the times // 28 ⋮ tba...
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. ꒷ TAG LIST .ᐟ.ᐟ [CLOSED 50/50] @celloccino @shokosbunny @nymphsdomain @alpha-mommy69 @soulairess @poopooindamouf @reyna-isabellaa @justamina-blog @koreluvsspring @mayhemfellasleep @clamousera @roxy776699 @l-ilysm @ayla-1605 @kaemaybae @starmapz @gigiiiiislife @puppyminnnie @desideityy @yuhig-blog @kaiiibxby @ami20019 @kentochronicles @missthatgirl @lauuriiiz @emi311 @lunavelha @coffeeisbehindyou @freakadelick @theclassbookworm @ladytamayolover @tojirin @fuckisthatahotghost @odxrilove @perqbeth @rxi-n-lyche3 @sugoroo @mentallyunpresent @naviaberries @wil10wthetree @thesharkcollector @harryzcherry @ghost-buddies @tearshedder @mourn1ng-dov3 @hellokittyish @good-mourning0 @shoma-nom @elegancefr @norikuna
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isasweetie · 5 months ago
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⋆˚࿔ espresso ꥟ ˚⋆ — sunny!reader x rafe
“ walked in and dream-came-trued for ya! “
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i believe the saying goes, “she was like a shot of espresso.” rafe didn’t think that saying could fit a person more than it could fit you.
he’d see you at parties, dancing with his sister or giggling with the pogues. you never could seem to pick a side. this whole pogue vs kook rivalry never crossed your mind, for you were simply friends with everyone in kildare. he’d see you at the beach with your friends, tanning while listening to silly pop music and sipping on a fruity canned drink. you reminded him of the sun.
there was one night where sarah cameron invited you to her place for a start-of-summer party. rafe was dealing some coke, as per usual, and his eyes followed you as you walked in, holding hands with sarah while she led you inside. he’d never understood why girls held hands with each other, but wheezie said that it’s a universal girl thing, and he ‘would never get it.’
topper elbowed rafe out of his trance, laughing about how rafe had a little crush.
“nah, nah,” rafe denied instantly. “isn’t she a pogue?”
topper shakes his head. “nope. she just hangs out with them. her parents own that flashy smoothie shop, she’s a kook,”
“…oh, that’s good,” rafe mutters. he can’t quite avert his gaze from you.
“aw man, you’re desperate,” kelce is on his other side, patting his back, making rafe grunt and shoo him off. rafe can’t relate to desperation.
his night goes on per usual, getting bundles of cash handed to him as he deals. until topper speaks up after a bit. “she just broke up with pope,” he informs rafe. “she’s on the market,”
“yeah?” rafe checks.
“yeah. you should go talk to her,”
rafe hesitates, staring at you again. you’re not a dancer by any means, but both you and sarah are wiggling your shoulders a bit when a good song comes up. rafe would assume you’re drunk, the way your giggles echo through the room and the way you spill your drink when you stumble into sarah. but he thinks that’s just you, drunk on life. he eventually speaks. “no fucking way, she’s with my sister right now. sarah would lose her shit if i talked to little miss sunshine over there,”
“yeah, well, need i remind you i’m dating sarah, so i’ll just get her away, go make out for a bit, she looks drunk,” topper offers.
“…a’ight. yeah, lets do it bro.” rafe agrees, and they both get up off the couch. rafe stands a little bit away as he grabs another vodka pink lemonade for you, maybe a subtle bribe into talking, and a beer for himself. topper talks to sarah for a bit, greets you, then leads sarah away.
rafe’s literally directly behind you, when suddenly you’re already talking to someone else. you’re pretty chatty, it seems. rafe hangs around to catch you after your next conversation. but then he looks away for one second, then you’re gone again. he spots you on the balcony, with jj maybank. then a couple minutes later, you’re with kie carrera. then you’re shotgunning a drink with sofia. holy shit. you’ve got him wrapped around your finger already, and he looks so cute chasing after you. if he’s not pushy, he’ll never get his chance. so, channeling his inner ward cameron, he spots you with ruthie (who he never would’ve assumed you would associate with. maybe you’re just being polite), and he puts a hand on your shoulder from behind, spinning you around. “y/n. right?”
you blink, not expecting the sudden interruption. but you regain yourself quickly, smiling. “hi! yeah, i am,” you say. your voice sounds as sweet as honey. “you’re rafe cameron?”
you know who he is? he shouldn’t be surprised, you seem to know everyone, but he likes that you know, anyway. “uh, yeah, yeah, that’s me,”
“well it’s so nice to meet you,” you smile up at him. “it’s funny, sofia used to mention you a lot, and obviously im close friends with your sister. but i’ve never met you before,”
“..you’re friends with sofia?” is all he can think to ask.
“mhm. i’ve known her since grade 5. we’re not like, super close now, but we were when you guys dated,” sensing his sudden aversion to talking about her, his ex girlfriend, you shut up. “um, wanna go grab a drink?”
“oh— shit, yeah, um, brought one for you, actually,” he hands you the vodka pink lemonade. “saw you drinking one earlier, so..”
“oh my gosh, thank you so much,” you say. is he that sweet? you guess so.
“yeah, ‘course. heard sarah talk about you, and it’s all been good things, so i figured i’d try and meet you myself,”
“well now you have. i’ve heard her talk about you too,” you don’t have the heart to say it hasn’t been very good things.
it feels like this awkward small talk is going in circles. but maybe that’s a good, slow way to start something.
your name is suddenly called by a group of girls a couple meters away. “it was so nice to meet you rafe. i should go, they want me,” you say softly, reaching for his hands. he remembers when you came in holding sarah’s hands. it seems to be your thing. “i’ll see you around?”
“yeah—“ he clears his throat, gaining the courage to hold yours back. “yeah. see you around, y/n,”
you smile. you could swear he’s blushing. “you’re cute,” you say softly, squeezing his hands once more before retreating away.
he feels like he just took a shot of espresso, and now he’ll be thinking of you every night.
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cameronsprincess · 3 months ago
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Truth or Dare — R.C
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summary: A game of truth or dare leads to you and your best friend taking a step over the line of friendship at a New Year’s Eve party.
CW: smut! 18+ only! bsf!rafe x bsf!reader, slightly angsty? (oops), drinking, game of truth or dare, mutual pining, spitting, handjob, male receiving oral, fingering, shared climax (is that a thing? they cum at the same time lmao)
note: happy new year babies🖤🥂 also big thank you to @cameronwillow + @rafesthroatbaby for helping me out with dares and truths for this!🤞🏻🤍
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“Alright, the rules are simple,” Topper shouts, passing out solo cups to everyone sitting around the table, “Truth or dare, we all know how to play it. But, tonight’s game is going to be a little different.”
You shift in your spot, your eyes glancing over at your best friend, Rafe Cameron, and the girl he had sat in his lap. You quickly stand, tuning Topper and his explanation of the game out, heading into the kitchen.
Your eyes scan the various bottles of liquor, settling on the Patrón silver. You glance back over at the table of your friends, eyes burning into the back of Rafe’s head before you tear them away, pouring the shot glass full and throwing it back, slamming it onto the counter and repeating the process.
The liquor burns as it slides down your throat, but you keep pushing, taking shot after shot until your face tingles, body buzzing from the tequila coursing through your veins. You slightly shake your head, the high pony your hair is in swaying side to side on top of your head. You’re not sure why you give a shit that Rafe is here with Brooke, it’s not like he’s yours. He’s not yours. He’s just your best friend. Always has been your- “Yo, Y/L/N. You gonna play or what?” Kelce shouts, cutting your thoughts off.
You give a weak smile, nodding your head and slowly making your way back to the group. The second you sit, you can feel his eyes on you, and you quickly glance at him, concern etched in his perfect face. You roll your eyes, tearing them off of him and focusing your attention on the game.
Topper goes first. “Alright…Ahhh, Tatum,” everyone laughs, knowing that Topper would choose Tatum first. “Truth or dare?”
Tatum gives him a mischievous smile, “Dare.” she says confidently.
Oohs erupt through the group, and Topper chuckles, flopping back into the chair he’s in. He places a hand on his chin, as if he’s in thought before his own grin spreads across his lips.
“I dare you…to do a body shot off the person you find most attractive in the group.”
Tatum snorts out a laugh, her lips pursed as she pushes herself out of her chair. She slowly makes her way toward Topper before quickly swerving to the right, her hand reaching out for Gabby.
Both girls erupt into a fit of giggles as Gabby lays on the ground, lifting her shirt just enough to expose her stomach. Tatum returns from the kitchen, bottle of Patrón in hand, before she sits herself on her knees on the floor. All of the guys are deadly silent, and you watch the expression on each of their faces as they watch Tatum pour the tequila on Gabby’s stomach, a lime held between the latter’s teeth. Tatum then pours a small amount of salt across Gabby’s upper stomach, licking it clean before drinking the shot from her belly button and moving to grab the lime from her teeth.
Your eyes land on Rafe’s, his bright blue pools burning into you instead of watching the show the other two girls were giving. The two of you keep your eyes on each other, not once breaking eye contact until Brooke’s voice breaks through the tension surrounding you.
“Rafey, truth or dare?” she asks, voice all high pitched and annoying as she bats her lashes at him.
Rafe clears his throat, “Uh.. Tru-Truth.” He replies, bringing his solo cup to his lips and taking a long sip.
Brooke lets out an obnoxious groan, like she was hoping he’d choose dare. Her bottom lip is pulled between her teeth as she thinks of a question to ask him. Finally, she smiles, “If you had to make-out with anyone in this room, who would it be and why?”
Rafe clears his throat, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. He places his hands on Brooke’s hips, lifting her from his lap and placing her in the empty chair next to him. She scoffs, crossing one leg over the other before she takes a long sip of her drink.
“Well? You gonna answer or lose a piece of clothing, Cameron?” Topper teases.
Rafe looks toward you, taking a quick sip of his drink and rolling his neck before he confidently says your name. A few shocked gasps tear through the room, and you choke on your drink, the rum and pineapple juice spilling down the front of your dress. You narrow your eyes on him. Is he fucking joking?
“Well… Alrighty then.. So it would be Y/N, but you have to tell us why?” Kelce says, breaking the awkward silence.
“Because why not? She’s hot, my best friend, and I dunno, I think she’d be a fun time.”
Your cheeks heat up, the alcohol along with Rafe’s words making your already foggy head spin.
“Alright, move on.” Rafe says firmly, standing from his chair and making his way into the kitchen to make a new drink.
You quickly stand from your spot, following Rafe into the kitchen. His body tenses the second you’re beside him. “What the hell was that?” You ask him, arms crossed over your chest.
Rafe pours more whiskey into his cup, quickly downing it before he turns to face you. He places his hands on your shoulders, and you suck in a breath when he lowers his face to yours. You can smell the whiskey and mint on his breath, the warmth sending a shiver down your spine. “It was nothin’ alright? Just wanted Brooke off my dick, she’s been trying all night, and I… I’m not into it. That’s all.”
You scoff. “Sure didn’t look like you weren’t into it, lettin’ her sit all pretty in your lap, I mean hell, you kissed her tonight did you not?”
Rafe sighs, running a hand through his messy hair. “Yeah.. Yeah, fuck. Alright yeah I did. But that was before I realized I didn’t want to go into next year lyin’ to myself about who I really want sittin’ in my lap at all these stupid ass parties.”
Your head tilts to the side, confusion written across your face. “And who do you want… Hmm? Anyone I know?”
Rafe laughs. “I think you know her pretty well.”
Jealousy sparks deep in your stomach, of course he’d be into one of your friends. It would never be you. He saw you as a sister, a best friend, nothing more, nothing less. The quicker you got that through your head, the better.
“Hey, look at me.” Rafe whispers, his thumb and index finger hooking under your chin to lift your head, forcing your eyes on him. You force the tears back, refusing to let him see you break. “Sweetheart, what’s wrong? Why are you so..so angry? Emotional? I don’t know but you’re just off tonight.”
You squeeze your eyes shut, opening your mouth to reply but Topper’s voice cuts you off. “Y/L/N, Cameron, get your asses back in here, it’s Rafe’s turn again.”
You take advantage of Rafe’s hold loosening on your chin, yanking away from him and making your way back to your seat. Rafe follows silently behind you, his ringed fingers tightly gripping at his solo cup as he sits down. Brooke places her hand on his thigh instantly, but Rafe roughly shoves her off, causing you to smile to yourself.
“Alright bud, truth or dare?” Topper asks Rafe.
Rafe straightens his spine, chugging down his whiskey before he says, “Dare.”
All the girls get excited, but you just roll your eyes, crossing your feet under your chair and sipping at your Malibu and pineapple.
“I dare you to spit tequila into the mouth of any girl in this room. The choice is yours.”
Hushed giggles fill your ears, every girl in this room— yourself included— hoping to be Rafe’s choice. Any girl would kill to have Rafe Cameron spit liquor into their mouths, but the off chance of him picking you is slim to none…
Your small pity party is short lived as Rafe stands, harshly yanking the Patrón bottle off the table, slowly making his way toward you. Your eyes flit up to his face, before looking back down at his outstretched hand. You take it, allowing him to pull you onto your feet. His right hand grips the back of your neck, squeezing softly before his left hand brings the liquor bottle to his lips. “Open up, sweetheart.” He rasps, bringing the lip of the bottle to his lips and filling his mouth with the clear liquid.
You obey, opening your mouth and allowing him to pull you into him, his grip on your neck tightening before he’s messily spitting the tequila into your open mouth. He pulls back, a smirk on his face as he watches the liquor that missed your mouth dribble down your lips and chin, falling onto your chest and dripping down the valley of your breasts. Rafe’s tongue darts out, licking up the liquor that’s on the side of your lips, running it down to your chin before stopping at your neck. His blue eyes burn into yours, silently asking for permission to continue.
You give him a small nod, your eyes never leaving his as he dips his head lower, his tongue softly licking at the skin of your neck, running it down low, low, all the way down to the exposed skin of your chest. He licks over the swell of your breasts, pulling a small, hushed moan from you. Rafe pulls back, placing a hand on your cheek, his thumb soothingly rubbing at the skin. His eyes dart back and forth between your eyes and your lips, and your heart rate picks up a notch. He leans in until his lips are brushing against yours, a smile taking over his face before he finally presses his lips against yours.
He kisses you slowly at first, but then he picks up his pace, slipping his tongue into your mouth and getting lost in your taste, your scent, just as much as you get lost in him. He wraps an arm around your waist, all the noise, everyone else in the room drowned out. It was just you and Rafe in this moment.
The sound of someone clearing their throat has you pushing off Rafe, face flushed and mind buzzing from the kiss.
“Alright, alright. It’s about damn time you two came to your senses, but do us all a favor? Get a room!” Topper jokes, throwing a small pillow at you and Rafe while laughing uncontrollably.
Rafe looks down at you, his eyes softening as he looks at you. “Do you want to? Get a room, I mean..” he laughs.
You bite at your bottom lip nervously. You want to, you really do, but you’re afraid to ruin what you and Rafe have. What if this messes everything up? You’ve wanted him for so long, and after that little show, it’s obvious he feels the same, but what if something goes wrong? What if this ruins your life-long friendship? What if-
“We don’t have to, sweetheart. There’s no press-”
Before he can even finish his sentence, you’re cutting him off with your lips, pressing a quick kiss to his before you say, “Of course I want to.”
Rafe is quick to grab your hand, dragging you toward the stairs as all of your friends hoot and holler behind you. Rafe starts pulling you up the stairs, dragging you down the long hallway upstairs before reaching an empty guest room at the end of the hall. He pushes the door open, softly nudging you inside before shutting and locking it behind him. He’s on you quick, his large hands gripping both sides of your face and pulling you back into him.
You and Rafe kiss each other fast and rough, tongues swirling, teeth clashing. You moan against his mouth when his teeth bite at your bottom lip, sucking it into his mouth before letting it go with a soft “pop”.
He pushes off of you, standing to his full height before you. You watch intently as he grabs the hem of his shirt, pulling it up and over his head, exposing his tanned and toned stomach and chest to you. Your hands fly to the belt, fingers fumbling with the buckle. You slowly pull the belt through the loops of his khakis, tossing it to the ground and popping the button on his pants before slowly pulling at the zipper. Rafe breathes heavy, his eyes darkened over with lust, watching your movements in awe. He’d never seen anyone so fucking perfect in his life. You were it for him, always had been.
You slowly push his khakis down his thighs, sucking in a sharp breath when you see the outline of his hard cock straining against the fabric of his briefs. Rafe smirks down at you, his fingers hooking under your chin and forcing your eyes back on him.
“You sure about this, sweetheart?”
You smile, wrapping your arms around his broad shoulders. “Absolutely sure.”
Rafe breathes out a sigh of relief, dipping down and pressing a quick kiss to your lips. You dig your fingers into the waistband of his briefs, shoving them down his thighs, his rock hard cock springing free, a bead of precum already leaking from the tip. You softly take him in your hands, giving slow, deliberate strokes, leaning forward and licking the precum from his slit.
Rafe lets out a throaty groan, his right hand sliding up your back, gripping at the back of your neck again. He squeezes softly, “Go on, sweetheart. Don’t be shy.” he teases.
You hold eye contact with him, continuing to slowly stroke his cock. Slowly leaning forward, you wrap your lips around the tip, swirling your tongue around the swollen head before pushing more of him down your throat.
Rafe groans, his fingers wrapping around the high ponytail you wore and tugging at it softly. You bob your head up and down his length, your tongue flattening against the vein on the underside of his cock running up as you pull back. You flick your tongue against his tip, swirling around it, teasing him.
He pulls you back by your hair, dropping himself onto the mattress and turning your body. You tuck your legs underneath yourself, folding yourself over, forearms resting on the mattress as you poked your ass out. Rafe runs his hands down your back, reaching the globe of your ass, gripping a handful in his hands through your dress before sliding his hands down to the hem of the dress.
His fingers rub over your pussy through your panties, a small raspy groan escaping him. “So fuckin’ wet aren’t you, sweetheart?”
You moan around his length, pushing him to the back of your throat and holding him there. Rafe groans, bucking his hips upward, his tip hitting the back of your throat. He slides your panties to the side, his fingertips teasing at your dripping entrance. He slowly pushes a finger inside you, curling it upward and toying at your g-spot. You quickly pull your head up off his cock, strings of spit pulling with your lips. You find his eyes, lips slightly parted as you breathe heavily, pushing yourself back onto his hand.
“God, you’re so fuckin’ sexy,” Rafe groans, adding another finger and harshly thrusting them in and out of you.
Your loud cries of pleasure fill the room, your eyes on Rafe as he finger fucks you, your hands making slow strokes to his shaft. You slowly rotate your hands, running them up his thick shaft and to his swollen tip. You close your hand around his tip, squeezing gently as you slowly circle your hand around it.
“Fuck, keep that up and I won’t last much longer, sweetheart.”
You smile up at him, wrapping your lips back around his cock and sucking at him fast. You keep your right hand wrapped around him, stroking and sucking simultaneously as Rafe picks up the pace of his fingers, pushing them in and out of your pussy roughly.
The loud chants of your friends downstairs catch your attention for a moment, the countdown to midnight starting. Rafe bucks his hips upward, fucking himself down your throat as his fingers push you closer to your release.
“Don’t focus on them, focus on me baby.” he says breathlessly, his cock pulsing against your tongue.
Your walls clench around his fingers at the same time his cock twitches, both of you about to come undone for one another.
“Three.. Two.. One.. HAPPY NEW YEAR!”
Your friends shouts boom downstairs, you and Rafe’s pleasured moans filling the guest room. Rafe thrusts up one final time, his dick stiffening before the hot ropes of his cum spill down your throat. You’re coming undone at the same time as him, legs shaking and body rocking against his hand as he fucks you through your high, riding out his own.
The two of you come down from your shared highs, trying to steady your breathing. Rafe pulls his fingers from inside you, bringing them to his lips and sucking them clean. You lift yourself up onto your knees, your eyes finding his again. You smile softly at him, “Happy New Year, best friend.”
“Nah, fuck that. You’re still my best friend, but we’re going into this year together. I mean that. You’re mine, and I’m yours. I think I always have been yours.”
You can’t contain the smile on your face, feeling giddy like a child that your best friend was now your boyfriend. You press a kiss to his lips, sighing contentedly as Rafe kisses you back with a hunger you’d never experienced.
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tagging some moots: @nemesyaaa @rafesthroatbaby @starkeysbabygirl @starkeysprincess @rafeyscurtainbangs @rafesbabygirlx @bloodibambiidoll @cameronwillow @oceandriveab @httpsdrewstarkey @cherrygirlfriend @sarahsangelicdoll @lacydollette
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bunny-jpeg · 4 months ago
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thinking about older brother’s best friend!max who takes little innocent virgin you home after you got too drunk at a party. you trust him so much and he’s sooo dreamy but you can’t figure out how you ended up in his lap with his fingers up your miniskirt, other hand locked around your neck and skimpy lace thong stuffed in your mouth. but you don’t want to annoy him when he’s finally paying attention to you, so you furiously nod and drool when he tells you to be his good girl, his stupid little slut, and bullies his big, aching cock into your pussy. it’s soo wet and sticky but it doesn’t matter cause maxie promised he was wearing a condom…right? Right?
thank you so much for sending this to me! this is a crazy ass prompt and i love it. thank you so much! and for the people at home, send me your shit! i love insane prompts to write! give them to me, i need to write! i went with the tried and trued method of a leclerc!reader so add a little extra zest to it. i changed a few things around so i hope that's okay, all the pieces are still there just a few tweaks!! i hope you enjoy <3
max verstappen
cw: smut/pwp, leclerc!reader, drunk sex, dubious consent, lying, unprotected sex, size difference/kink, crybaby!reader, dark-ish fic, missionary position, fingering, (slight) choking, (technical) virgin!reader, filth(!!!)
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"thank you so much for doing this. i told her not to go out tonight because i was out of town and couldn't get her if she needed help. you're a big help, mate. i owe you." charles' voice was clear on the other end of the phone.
max was grabbing his keys, "you owe me nothing, charles. i'm happy to help. wasn't up to much else tonight." he got his shoes on and headed out the door, "i'll let you know when i get her." then hung up the phone.
he got in his car and drove to the club you were supposed to be. max had known you for about as long as he had known charles, you were the curious little thing that liked being around your brother. you were close in age, but max hadn't seen you in years.
charles said that university had prevented you from ever really hanging around as much as you used to. which was a shame because max always thought you were cute, even if you were a little bit a cry baby.
he pulled up to the address of where you were supposed to be and got out of the car. it was late into the evening and there were a few people outside. the sight of him turned a few heads and some whispers. but he had to pick you out of the crowd.
he leaned against the car and did the tried and true method of finding a leclerc. he cupped his hands around his mouth and said, "hey! leclerc!"
and then as it had worked a million times with charles over the years, your voice rang out, "holy shit, max! what are you doing here?" and you got out of the crowd in front of the club.
that was when max's heart stopped.
he remembered you in your high school uniform and baggy t-shirts with various bands on them. he remembered when you had braces and that bad haircut in tenth year. but, now, are a twenty-something year old woman, you were beautiful.
you practically stumbled over to him, you tripped over the curb and against his chest. but you clung to the front of his t-shirt, "oh my god, it's you!" you howled laughter, "where's charlie?"
max steadied you back on your feet and looked over you to see the other people who were murmuring. he looked down at you, his hands still on your shoulders, "i'm going to take you back to my place tonight." even though charles said to bring you back to his place, there would be a slight detour.
plus, what if something happened? max needed to protect you, or at least he had self appointed himself with the role.
"god, i haven't seen you in like what, five years? still got those chubby cheeks though." you giggled drunkenly as you pinched at his face.
max could feel the heat rise in his face, didn't help that your plump breasts were pressed against him and he got a good view of your cleavage. he said to you, "c'mon, let's get out of here." he gave you a smile, "i think we're turning too many heads."
you nodded innocently before max helped you into the car. even going as far as to buckle to you in and closing the door. as he rounded the car he exhaled deeply, this was not what he was expecting.
you looked at him and giggled, "holy shit, it's actually you. why are you picking me up? i called charlie?"
max sighed and buckled himself in, he patted your knee, "how much have you had to drink? your brother is out of the country for most of the summer break."
a few seconds ticked by before you made an 'o' shape with your mouth, you snapped your fingers and pointed to max, "i was supposed to call lorenzo!"
max's eyebrows knitted together, "how much have you had to drink?"
you shrugged, "i don't know. there was this nice guy who kept buying me drinks and he was like super nice. but then, my friends kinda got me away from him and told me to call my brother and i said, 'which one?', because you know. i have three brothers and i don't very well want arthur to see me THIS drunk so i called charles... but i wasn't supposed to call charles, i was supposed to call lorenzo."
max wanted to kiss you really badly at that moment. and when he squeezed your thigh for reassurance, you moaned. then max's brain went silent for a moment.
you looked at each other and you felt the heat rise in your cheeks as you said, "sorry.... over sensitive." you licked your lips, "you can still hold my thigh if you want."
this was going to be a long night, and max wanted to see how deep this could go. after all, you both had about five years to make up.
"i hate being this drunk." you whined, as you padded across his home. you were out of the skimpy dress you wore to the club, much to max's pleasure. you looked better in no bra, one of his t-shirts and his socks that you pulled as high as they could go, "i wish i could stop being drunk the moment i got home."
he was on the couch, a glass of water and some tylonel was on the table. he patted his thigh and suggested, "i think i know something that can help." his brain had been trying to think of a clever way to get you closer to him, but you were too easy.
"water and rest?" you asked as you got closer to him. your arms across your chest.
he leaned back into the sofa a little and said, "no. why don't you come here to find out?" he could tell in the slight wave of your stance that you were still quite drunk. he chuckled as he watched you come over to him, were all leclercs curious like cats?
you perched yourself on his thigh and he pulled you into his lap. being so close to you made his cock throb in his jeans. you yelped and admitted, "i'm a virgin!"
"what?"
you looked at him so innocently it almost broke the driver's brain in half. you had your hands up near your face and your bottom lip was wobbling, "i've... i've never had sex before. i mean... i technically let a guy finger me." you swallowed, not knowing why you were admitting this, "but.. but he didn't even make me cum, i lied to him and faked it."
max's hungry gaze remained on you, "so... so no one's actually... had sex with you."
you looked like you were going to cry. you were in your twenties and a virgin (he wasn't going to acknowledge the curl of jealousy in his gut at the thought of some loser at your school poorly trying to finger you). that had all the lights going off in max's brain.
leclerc's little sister was a virgin, drunk and on the verge of tears in max's condo. shivering like a leaf. max never thought of himself in terms of animals, but at moment he felt like a big scary lion. and you a poor little deer. the signature leclerc doe eyes only added to his point.
"it's alright." he said, "how about this, you let me finger you properly. i don't think your technical first time should've been spent with you faking an orgasm."
you had to admit, you had feelings for max. when you were younger and your brother would race him, you'd follow him around afterwards asking about max. it annoyed the hell out of your brother.
even the guy who fingered you was almost an exact fit to max, the blond-brown hair, blue eyes and a big nose. but it didn't quite cut it. max had been the subject of your fantasies for years now.
you blushed, "i mean... i don't want to force you or anything. i don't want it to be a pity fuck."
he laughed and curled a strong arm around you, "no, no, not you. to make you cum would be an honour." catch more flies with honey than vinegar. catch the pretty sister of a fellow driver with soft words.
he got your panties off with a little help and put them in your mouth. the sight of your mouth full of your lacy thong made all the blood in his body pool into his cock. he brushed your cheek and chuckled at your lack of resistance, "aw, does someone like to be roughed up? i bet you're just so used to everyone treating you like glass. the only daughter." he cupped your pussy with his wide hand, "how would charles feel about this? or lorenzo? they'd have my head." he kissed at your neck.
you whined, liquor swam in your head still as you squirmed a little, "don't talk about my brothers while you're fingering me." you tried to say around the panties in your mouth.
max grazed his fingers across your pussy, "alright, alright." his breath was hot in your ear as his other hand came and was placed around your throat. he shuddered a little, oh you were just a perfect fit weren't you?
now max really had to make sure that you weren't going to run off to your private university and fooled around with other boys.
maybe a baby would have to do.
he held you close to him by the throat and played with your pussy. soon he sank two digits into you and you whined around the panties in your mouth. you felt a hot flash go through you.
this was totally different, you felt the pleasure bloom in your gut as he roughly fingered you. you held onto his wrists, but remained pressed to him as he occasionally rubbed his clothed erection against your backside.
"oh, you're beautiful." he said softly, "you are so painfully beautiful. i'm surprised you haven't made yourself a whore at school. why? scared that your brothers would kill whoever touched their sister?" he kissed your cheek as he heard your whimper.
your body felt loose and your brain felt like it was working overtime. it was beyond adorable, the little cry baby with tears in her eyes. don't worry, max will make it all better.
"but you don't want anyone else, do you? you wanna be my good girl? you know so little about sex, poor thing. but don't worry, i'll make you a nice little whore for my cock." he pressed on your throat a little harder as he really started to work his fingers inside of you.
you didn't know what to think, everything around you felt oppressive but the liquor and lust short-wired your brain. you nodded and tried to speak around the fabric in your mouth, but it all came out like a jumbled mess.
max could feel the heat rise in his body, his cock grew more stiff. he liked the sight of this. you in his clothes, letting him explore your body. you were untouched territory. all for max's taking.
you wanted to cover your face from the embarrassment of being finger-fucked by your crush. but max squeezed your throat a little tighter.
"don't hide yourself from me, i want to see it all." he pressed a hard kiss onto your shoulder and watched your shudder. your pussy clenched around his fingers which only spurred him to keep bullying them into you.
you whined something around the panties in your mouth and max continued his kisses. you felt amazing on him. he hissed against your back as you hit your climax and whined loudly. you coated his entire hand in your wetness.
max moved you by your neck and kissed you on the cheek, he said, "good girl. see, orgasms aren't that hard." he let go of your throat and took the panties out of your mouth.
you were panting heavily as you said, "holy shit." your heart was hammering and you felt hot all over. you felt his arms around you waist and his mouth in your ear.
"we're not done yet." he said.
before you knew it, you were on max's bed. the shirt you had borrowed was on the floor and your bra was right next to it. when max took off your socks, you whined and he pressed all his weight on top of you. leaving one sock left on you.
he was naked on top of you, his cheeks were pink and he felt hot all over. you could see your eye bug out a little from the sight of his naked body. he pulled away soon after and grabbed you by the hips then rubbed his hard cock against your slick pussy.
"i wish your brother brought you to the track more." he chuckled as he continued to rub up against you, "you would've been so cute hanging around, you were always so curious. but, i don't know if i could contain myself if you were around often."
you blushed, "oh c'mon, stop it, max. you're going to kill me!"
max was over you, "i would never do that. i like you very much alive. you're perfect. i think it would be the best strategy your brother ever did if he had you around the paddock. i'd have to fight off every other driver to get to you."
you admitted, "i'd only want you, max."
max grinned, "is that why you're letting me take your virginity? giving yourself over to me? i bet a part of you wished i showed up, maybe that was all the plan for you." he pressed the tip of his cock up against your entrance, "someone has a crush." he was teasing, but the look on your face showed that he had you all figured out.
you squeaked, "i do! i'm sorry! i've had one for years!" you looked like you were going to cry again.
max almost came from the sight before him, he swallowed to keep himself together as he reached for your face with one hand and looked into your eyes, "you like me."
in your inebriated state you replied, "more like love you."
he chuckled, "really now? after all the times i beat your brother, you had all these feelings for me." he pressed his chest up against you, as he guided his cock into your slick slit.
you clutched onto his shoulders and tried not too tense up too much. this was a wet dream come true. you croaked, "i've always have."
"well, aren't i lucky." he said as he kissed you gently, "taking the virginity of the most beautiful woman i've ever seen." he was a snug fit in you but, he peppered your cheeks with kisses to help relax you. thankfully you were painfully wet.
he felt a curl of possession in his gut. like he needed to have you by his side. it wouldn't be hard to convince charles to let the two of you date, even if he was protective of you. he knew that max was a good man, he'd be a loving, caring boyfriend. maybe even an eventual husband.
he moved his hips slowly, not to push too much on you at once. you were still painfully drunk, all of these were admissions under intoxication. the consent of the situation was murky at best, but the way you looked at he pushed his cock into you excited him.
"do you want this?" he asked.
you nodded, your gaze unfocused, "of course. why, why would you ask that?" you really were so cute. your brain was polluted with liquor and pleasure, maybe he should've put you to bed before this all got out of hand.
but in all fairness, max was a little too far gone. he always held feelings for you, he was just better at covering them up. but, as he thrusted into you, your legs around his waist as he rutted against you. it was like the little flame from his youth came alive into an inferno.
oh, this was the woman he was meant to marry.
he kissed you once more, and picked up the pace. he held your sides, feeling your warmth against him as he felt the intense feelings bloom in your chest. call him an obsessive freak, but he should've known all those years ago.
stupid teen max, look what was right in front of him! you two could've been married by now. had a family and everything. but as he was balls deep inside of you, he believed everything happened for a reason.
you were now in his arms, under him as he moved against you. the blunt end of his cock, hit against the beginning of your cervix. a promise of what was to come. that you'd get nice and pregnant by him.
by the time he was finished with you, you were going to be at least five percent dutch if not more, you two had a whole week together. this was just the start. you two lazily made out.
the lust throbbed in your head as the liquor still coursed through your system. your mouth felt dry but you couldn't do much else but lie under him. his kisses were domineering and strong. his cock was buried up inside of you like it belonged there.
he believed that you two were two halves of a same whole. he wish he had gotten a glimpse of you sooner. seen how much you matured, he melted a little at the feeling of you. beyond perfect for him.
the pleasure was getting to your head, even in your intoxicated state. you clung to him like a life line as he moved against you. your sweet noises and that your eyes were barely open.
"beautiful." he said, "and all mine."
you swallowed, "you're wearing a condom, right?"
he staggered in his pace for a moment, but he gave you best media smile as he lied through his teeth, "of course, can't have any accidents." he kissed you once more. and you just melted into it so easily.
you then let out a sweet noise as you felt orgasm grip you. you panted heavily as the lust flooded your brain. you held onto him tightly as he continued to move against you. this all felt like a dream, and the noises you made as you came had max panting heavily.
"please."
"i need you." you said with tears in your eyes. the orgasm has torn through you and you were left a sputtering, hot mess under him.
he continued to rut against you, his pace was erratic as he moved against you. his heart raced at the sight of you. he was fully gone for you, he wanted you. tomorrow and the day after that and the day after that. he wanted his cock buried in your sweet pussy.
it was fine, obviously there was a connection. he just had to seal the deal, and with a few more strokes of his cock. he was putting all of his weight on top of him. he finished inside of you and you made a small pathetic noise.
"fuck." he groaned.
you whined, "please, max."
when he pulled away, he wasn't away long. he soon pulled you in for a searing hot kiss while he let his cock stay inside of you for a moment longer. to feel the closeness. you were a lucky girl, you were now max's newest obsession.
he licked the bead of sweat off your neck, his cock twitched inside of you. perfect.
he curled up beside you soon after, his grip on you was possessive at the least and obsessive at the most. he felt like a lion with prey between its jaws, not biting hard enough to kill it. but just to keep it still. you were a sweet little thing in his arms.
maybe it was smart for you not to be around the track as much because of school, because if max had gotten a glimpse of the little crybaby leclerc all grown up, you two would've already been married by now.
but don't worry, be a good girl and you'll have a pretty ring in your future. the thoughts pooled in max's gut and made his softening cock twitch a little.
before he could go another round with you, you were fast asleep next to him. your soft snoring could be felt in his chest. he may have had to a little lying and manipulating before, but he wasn't going to fuck that sweet cunt while you were asleep.
he wasn't a monster. but that didn't mean he got out of your sleepy grasp and grabbed his phone from his jeans pocket to take some photos. not to share of course, he doesn't share. they'll be for his personal collection when you eventually go limping back to your brother.
come morning you were wrapped up in max's arms. you woke up with a throbbing headache and the sun that came through the window made you want to die. when you tried to wiggle in his grasp, he held on tighter.
he kissed you on the back of the neck, "good morning."
the sound of his low voice was like a shock to your system as you woke up quicker. you looked over your shoulder at him and swallowed. last night was barely pieced together. but you were naked next to him under the covers with one of his cats scratching at the door demanding breakfast.
when you tried to pull away he only pulled you back to him. your back against his broad chest. he said, "you're not getting away that easily." he rested his head on your shoulder, his arms around you tightened.
"what happened last night?" you croaked.
"ah don't worry. just tell your brother your safe and sound. you can stay here until he gets back home." he rubbed his cock up against your behind, "a woman like you shouldn't be alone in a city like this. lots of bad men out there that could hurt you."
"but not you?" you felt something bloom in your chest. the familiar pang from your youth.
he kissed your jaw and said, "of course. i'll always keep you safe." as if his cum wasn't dried to your inner thigh. but don't worry, he'll freshen it up once that pesky headache of yours is gone. after all, your sweet older brother was gone for another week.
-
"you know." charles said sometime later, he was in max's drivers room picking at the food on the table, "i feel like i should kill you for fucking my sister."
max was seated across from him, one leg over the other. he smirked, "and what's stopping you?"
charles shrugged, "i don't have to hear her talk about you all the time. i mean, at least i can vouch for you. you are practically family, better than some random guy that she met at school." he looked at his fellow driver, "will not forgive you for getting her pregnant though. and outside of marriage too. you should've heard our mother when she told her." he rubbed his forehead.
max chuckled, "well that'll be dealt with after the season. it feels wrong scheduling it between races. she deserves a lovely wedding."
"good, good. and i better see my nephew! we live in the same city, you better not lock her away!" charles shook his finger at max.
max laughed, "don't worry don't worry. but i cannot promise that he race for monaco when he grows up." then winked at his fellow driver (and future brother in law).
in the end, max hobbled together a narrative of the night you spent together. which led to a week together, which led to you getting pregnant by him. no one could've suspected that he could ever hurt a hair on your head. he was too in love with you, almost to an obsessive degree. he took your virginity and now you were taking his last name. <3
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formula-ghost · 3 months ago
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Wildflower (OP81 x fem!reader x LN4)
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Chapter 1
SERIES SUMMARY: You’ve been best friends with Oscar Piastri since you were seven, far before the dream of Formula 1 even seemed possible. You’ve been with him from the very beginning—due, in no small part, to the fact that you’ve been in love with him since you were a teenager. But when a breakup and championship battle rattles the very foundations of your friendship, you begin to question if you ever really knew him. (Best friends to lovers, based on the song Wildflower by Billie Eilish)
WORD COUNT: 11.1k
WARNINGS: Oscar is not a very good boyfriend to Lily and Lily is not a very good girlfriend to Oscar. Potentially changed some dates (I think Oscar and Lily started dating when they were 17 or 18, but I’m making them 18 for the sake of the flashback scenes). Reader is “the girl he told me not to worry about” through no fault of her own. This story has a lot of complex character dynamics and everyone is flawed! References to sex but no actual smut.
A/N: Ah new series! I hope this is good—I’m trying some new stuff with the flashbacks and story layers, so I hope it doesn’t read too confusingly! Also, I’m trying to be more intentional with showing instead of telling with my dialogue and such, so hopefully that is an improvement. I always welcome constructive criticism, but either way, I hope you all enjoy this.
Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5
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“Lily left me.”
He only needed those three words to convey the gravity of the situation. On the other end of the line, you were silent. He was too. What was there to say?
No, it couldn’t be real. Oscar and Lily were inseparable. The dream couple of Formula 1. Your best friend had been in love with her since the pair were 18, attending boarding school in the UK together while Oscar pursued his dreams of making it to F1. 
They were each other’s everything. At least, that’s what the world thought.
But you had seen this coming for a while now. It was just a shock for it to actually happen. 
Finally, after an eternity, you spoke, still too shocked to formulate a coherent thought. “What do you mean?” you asked.
“I mean she fucking left me. What else do you want me to say?” You could hear the quivering in his voice, giving away the sadness behind his abrasive response. You weren’t offended one bit. 
“Shit, Osc, I’m so sorry. I… don’t know what to say. Do you want me to come over? Or you can come to mine?” 
“I’m outside yours right now. In the car park.” 
“I’ll let you in,” you said. The mental image you conjured of Oscar outside your apartment crying in his fancy McLaren would have been comical, if not given the circumstances.
He let himself in only a few moments later, hoodie covering his tall and muscled frame. He was soaked from the rain outside—he must have come directly from the confrontation. 
“Oh, Oscar,” you said, pulling him into a hug, cringing at the contact with his soggy hoodie, but knowing that there were far more important things to be worried about. 
You rubbed your hands up and down his shoulder blades that now heaved with sobs. His entire body shook with the fervor of his tears, and you just held him, gently shushing him and promising that everything will be okay. 
“I don’t know how she could do this to me,” he said, gasping out the words between haggard breaths. “The championship—I can’t do it without her.”
“I know,” you assured him. “It’s gonna be okay.”
“No it’s not, YN, it’s not gonna be okay. I love her. And she just threw away so many years.”
“I know.” You just kept assuring him, tightening your grip on him as his sobs became more intense. “Just breathe.”
“Why would she do this to me?” he asked. “I don’t understand. I don’t know what I did to deserve this.”
You knew. And deep down, Oscar did too. That was a conversation for another day. But he’d be lying if he said he hadn’t seen this coming. 
You didn’t have it in you to lie to him. You had always been the type to pride yourself on being honest, even when the truth hurt, but you couldn’t bear to do it now. You changed the subject.
“Oscar, you’re soaking wet. I’ll find you something else and warm that up in the dryer, yeah? Just sit down, take a deep breath, and let me get this figured out.”
He sat down on your couch and took off his hoodie and t-shirt underneath, revealing his toned body. It wasn’t anything you hadn’t seen before—you’d been friends with him since you were seven, growing up together. He almost felt like a brother to you, sometimes.
Maybe it wouldn’t be weird at all, except for the fact that you’d been in love with him for over a decade now. 
But right now that didn’t matter. He had plenty of old hoodies over in your apartment, which you carefully folded every time he forgot them. Placing his wet clothes in the dryer and setting the temp on high, you reached to the shelf above you and grabbed a random one. You unfolded it—an Alpine hoodie from back in the day, before his time at McLaren. You smiled at the memories that flashed in your mind, before quickly returning to Oscar with the garment. 
He had moved from your couch to your bedroom, holding a pillow on his lap, hunched over where the top of it met his chin. He was staring off into space, not breaking his gaze at the plain white wall.
You sat next to him, handing him the hoodie, and he mumbled a small thanks as he grabbed it. He didn’t put it on, instead just holding it with the pillow, as if filling his arms with the plush material would fill the hole now left in his heart.
“Oscar, I… don’t have anything profound to say. I’m so sorry.”
He didn’t respond at first, instead just silently letting the tears well up in his eyes. 
“I guess I should have seen this coming,” he said quietly. 
You paused, unsure whether or not you should agree with him. But you were nothing if not honest.
“Yeah,” you said, “it’s been a rough few months.”
“I guess we just both fell out of love.”
“I mean… how did the conversation go?”
It would be stupidly easy for Oscar to lie and say he didn’t remember Lily’s every word. But he knew better, and so did you. As he explained, the memory replayed in his head.
“I can’t do this anymore, Oscar,” Lily said, a simple yet devastating statement.
“What do you mean? What’s wrong?” His confusion was genuine, much to the chagrin of his angry girlfriend.
“The fact that you even have to ask that proves my point.”
“Lily, talk to me. I don’t know what you’re trying to say.” Oscar stood up, now understanding the full gravity of the situation he found himself in. 
“I’m trying to say that I’m not happy anymore, and neither are you. I wanted to at least give it until the end of the season, but I can’t keep pretending that everything is okay when we both know bloody well that it’s not! Don’t you want something better than this, Oscar?” Lily pleaded. 
“I just want you. That’s all I’ve ever wanted.”
“Don’t lie to me. You say that but you put everything else before me. I’m not a priority to you. I haven’t been in a long time.”
“I’ll quit F1. We can go back to the UK and live a normal life.”
“No. We both know that you wouldn’t do that.” Her tone was incredulous, twinged with a slight anger at the mere suggestion. 
“Yes, I would. I’d do anything. Don’t do this, Lily. Not now, not when I need you the most.”
Lily grabbed his hand, leading him to sit down on the couch next to her. “Oscar,” she began, “we had a good run. You made me so, so happy for so long.” She reached up to gently cup his cheeks and wipe away where tears were now forming at the edge of his eyes. “I saw you achieve things that neither of us ever thought were possible. But…I can’t stay any longer. Not when there’s no place for me in your heart anymore.”
You sighed. You knew every word that Lily had said was right. But you also knew you couldn’t get that through to Oscar, at least not until the shock wore off.
The words remained unspoken. You had been there for all of it. Lily was his first love, his only girlfriend, and everyone assumed that he’d marry her one day; you included. 
“I just…I don’t know how I’m supposed to go on acting like my life didn’t just fall apart. How did you do it?”
This was Oscar's first breakup, but you had been through too many, it seemed, since he was asking you for advice on how to handle them.
The truth? It was very easy to get over a breakup when every partner you’ve ever had was a feeble attempt at denial. When they all inevitably failed, you just went back to bask in Oscar’s platonic love. It was enough. 
“I won’t lie to you, the first one is always hell. You feel like you’re going crazy for a while. You lose hope that you’ll ever feel happier, because everything reminds you of them. And then one day it just…doesn’t. The only thing that heals it is time and finding love around you, you know, friends and family.”
“No offense, but that doesn’t make me feel any better.”
‘Well, I’m not going to lie to you and say it’ll be easy, because it won't. But it will be okay—not today, but someday. You’ve got something to focus on with the championship. And I’ll be here.” You gave him an empathetic smile. 
Maybe you weren’t the most comforting friend to most. But you and Oscar had a bond that was very different to most friendships. You understood each other’s idiosyncrasies in ways no one else could. So when shit hit the fan, it was always each other that you went to.
You continued, “You can stay here as long as you like.”
“Thank you.”
There was only one problem: your apartment only had one bed. And to the dismay of fanfiction writers across the world, you all would not be sharing it. 
You distracted Oscar by cooking a meal and watching a comfort movie—Cars, a classic. You could tell he was exhausted by the way his head on your shoulder sloped just a little too heavily downwards as the credits rolled. 
“Okay, let’s get you to bed,” you said, gently pushing him awake. He sleepily stumbled back into your bedroom and collapsed on the bed, almost instantly falling back asleep.
You took the couch, but despite the money you spent splurging on the extra cushioned sofa, no sleep came to you. 
It wasn’t any physical discomfort that fueled your insomnia, but rather, the events of the previous evening. Lily had actually left Oscar. She had finally pulled the plug.
Yes, in some ways, it was expected. But at the same time, you couldn’t imagine a version of your best friend that wasn’t madly in love with his girlfriend. 
From the outside, though, you couldn’t blame Lily one bit. You wondered what had been the last straw. 
You could think of three possible moments. First: The Apartment. 
“I’m moving to Monaco,” Oscar began, and you felt your heart drop in your stomach. Of course, one day he’d make it to Monaco. That was the dream of every Formula 1 driver, right? The beauty of the French Riviera and tax evasion. And you’d be left at your aging flat in the UK, waiting for those precious few days a year where he was free to grace you with his presence. 
“That’s amazing!” you said, only half believing it to be true. 
“In a few weeks I’m gonna go look at condos. Come with me? Lily can’t get off work.”
“Of course,” you replied. You’d already been to Monaco before for Oscar’s races, but you wouldn’t turn down any reason to get out of the constant dreary rain of the UK. 
You felt like a celebrity as you coasted through the Monte Carlo streets in the passenger side of Oscar’s McLaren, on your way to tour fabulous properties for your best friend (the actual celebrity). You breathed in the saltwater breeze, fresh and tinged with the air of wealth and splendor.
But it hurt your heart to know that you were helping your best friend leave. You imagined him getting up and doing his morning runs along the harbor, the sun blazing down the strained muscles on his back. Then you laughed to yourself at the thought of Oscar, the pastiest Aussie you knew, getting sunburnt. 
At the first property you met the realtor, who (after mistaking you for Lily; not the first time, and certainly wouldn’t be the last) took the pair of you to different condos throughout the day. 
Oscar decided on the final one you saw; two bedrooms, plenty of natural light, and a great view. Elegant, refined and practical—just like Oscar himself. 
The realtor handed him the paperwork and left as you stood on the balcony, looking at the beauty of the city before you. You were quiet, unusually so, and Oscar noticed. 
He sat the paperwork on the kitchen counter and walked onto the balcony next to you. “Beautiful, isn’t it?”
“Yeah,” you said, your voice lowered. “You’re gonna make such beautiful memories here.”
“Are you getting sentimental on me now?”
You smiled and laughed. “A little,” you admitted, “I can’t help it. I’ll miss you all.” 
“You could always come with us. You seem to like it here,” he teased, tilting his head toward the edge of the balcony.
“You’d have to give me a raise if I was gonna afford Monaco rent prices.” You’d been running Oscar’s merch store and social media for the past few years, making a great wage, but nowhere near the immense wealth you’d need to call a place like this home. You joked with him, knowing Oscar actually had nothing to do with how much you got paid. 
“I would if I could. But, I mean, if you had a place to stay it wouldn’t really be that bad.”
“Are you suggesting I move into your guest room?”
Now he laughed. “No, but I’m just saying, if you had an apartment, you could make it work.”
You raised an eyebrow, confused, but trying to go along with the joke. “Well, sure, but apartments don’t just appear out of thin air.”
“You never know.” Oscar scratched the back of his neck and looked away, a sign of the awkwardness that now blanketed your moment on the balcony. 
“What are you getting at?”
“Well, theoretically, if someone were to have a spare apartment that they weren’t using, you could live there and Monaco would be a reasonable place to live, no?”
You didn’t answer his question, instead just giving him another confused glance until he gave up whatever he was trying to say. He still couldn’t meet your gaze. 
“Look—I don’t want to live so far away from my friend. Is that such a bad thing?”
“Oscar, you…”
“I got you an apartment.”
“You… bought me an apartment. In Monaco.” It came out more like a statement than a question, evidence of your shock. He reached into his pocket and dug out a key, holding it out to you.
You just looked at him with an incredulous expression. “Oscar, I can’t accept that.”
“Why not?”
“How much was it?” 
“I have more than enough money.”
“Answer the question.”
He pursed his lips and shrugged. “About 4 million?” 
Your eyes widened in shock. “Before you say anything,” he began, “I made over 30 million last year. I have more money than I’d ever know what to do with, so why not just spend it all on the people I love?” 
“Oscar… I can’t, that’s too much.”
“Will you at least go look at it with me? Actually, I’m driving, so you don’t have a choice,” he joked, walking back into the apartment. “Let’s go.”
You sighed, smiling to yourself. There was no way you could let Oscar buy you a 4 million dollar apartment, but also, how could you not? The wind whipped through your hair as you rolled down the window of his McLaren, drinking in the beauty of the city around you. 
The apartment was smaller than the one he had picked for himself and Lily, but you didn’t mind one bit. It was perfectly cosy, and God, the view was spectacular. You could see the whole city from his apartment, but here, you could see the water. You stepped on the balcony and took a deep breath, taking in the sound of the ocean waves beneath you. 
Oscar followed you. “It’s a bit small, but I figured you’d like the view.”
“Oscar…”
“If you really don’t want it, I can rent it out. But I’d much rather have you close.” He held out the keys again. “What do you say?”
You could have told him you needed more time to think about it, but deep down, you already knew what you wanted. You took the keys. “Thank you. Thank you so much, Oscar. Seriously.”
“No need to thank me.” He smiled.
Back in the UK, he showed Lily the photos he had taken of the condo he had chosen for them as they went over the paperwork one last time.
He grabbed the pen to scratch out one of the boxes Lily had checked, hoping she wouldn’t notice. 
“Oh, did I mess something up?” Shit. She leaned over his shoulder, reading the paperwork aloud. “Please indicate if you own any additional properties in the principality of Monaco.” She looked at Oscar. “You already have a property there?” 
“Oh, erm, yeah,” he said, hoping the conversation would end there. 
“How come I never heard about this?” 
“Um, I just got it a bit ago.”
Lily could sense her boyfriend’s hesitancy. “Is this something I wasn’t supposed to know about?”
“Oh, no,” he said, “it’s not like that. I just didn’t think to mention it.”
“So, what is this property?”
“An apartment.” 
Lily hated feeling like she was having to interrogate Oscar, but clearly there was some piece of the puzzle missing that was causing his reluctance. 
“An apartment?” she questioned. “You got another apartment?”
“Yeah, I, um,” he looked at the ceiling while scratching his neck, a clear sign of his nervousness, “I was planning on giving it to YN.”
“You bought YN an apartment in Monaco? When were you planning on telling me about this?” 
His walls of defense had finally broken down. “It’s not a big deal. I made more than enough last season, I could afford it.  And it’s just easier to have her there for the brand shoots and media stuff. Plus, I mean, she came to London to support me after graduation, even though I know she hates it here. I just figured I should repay the favor.”
“...Okay,” Lily began, her voice tinged with skepticism. “So, you do realize what this looks like, right?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, my boyfriend bought an apartment for his “best friend” and tried to hide it from me. That’s the kind of thing cheating husbands do in movies, buy an apartment for their mistress for her to keep it quiet.”
Oscar wasn’t sure what annoyed him more, the air quotes Lily placed around “best friend” or the insinuation that he had been unfaithful. 
“Lily, seriously? I’m not cheating on you, I love you and you know that.”
“When were you going to tell me about this?”
“I don’t know, I didn’t think it was that big of a deal. You know YN and I have been friends forever, it’s not like I did this for some random woman. I don’t appreciate being accused of lying.”
“But you were lying by omission.”
“Lily—”
“You know, nothing against her, but one of the reasons I was looking forward to this move was having more…us time. Without YN.” 
The statement brought a bitter taste to his mouth. Despite what she had said, it seemed like Lily did have something against you.
“You know, this kind of thing is why I was putting off telling you about it.”
“What are you saying?” she asked. Oscar knew he was tempting fire, but he didn’t care.
He continued, “You’re freaking out because I did something kind for a friend. I’m allowed to do whatever I want with my money.”
“I never said you weren’t, and I’m not freaking out. But I guess I’m just such a horrible person for saying I want to spend more time with my boyfriend.”
“If you’re putting down my “best friend” to do it,” he said, mocking her air quotes, “then yeah, that’s not cool.” 
“Oscar, you’re being so…weird about all of this. I’m not insulting YN. I just want to spend more time with you.”
“We’re literally going on vacation in February!”
“With friends. You invited your friends to our romantic getaway, Oscar.”
“You know I only have so much time off during the off season, and I’m spending most of it with realtors and accountants and eight thousand other people preparing us for this move. God forbid I want to invite my friends to Italy with us. Not everything can be just us, Lily.”
“Okay,” she sighed. “I’m done with this conversation.”
The second next instance you could think of happened on the trip.
It was a beautiful getaway to the Amalfi Coast, your dream destination that you’d somehow never made it to.
The group of Oscar’s friends, including you and Lando, had plans to come and go, with everyone being gone before the fourteenth so that Oscar and Lily could have their Valentine's Day date. Of course, you knew nothing of the arguments they’d had in the past about this, but you had common sense enough to not be a third wheel. Oscar thought this was a good enough compromise. 
Well, he thought. 
From the moment he picked you up from the airport, you could tell that the energy was different than usual. He blamed it on jet lag, but you knew better. You knew your best friend too well.
It didn’t take you long to figure out the problem was between him and Lily. She was colder towards him; not enough for anyone but you and him to notice, but still there and undeniable. 
Even weirder was Lily’s…preoccupation, it seemed, with pointing out single and attractive men to you. It wasn’t a hushed reality that you were single, and had been for some time. You'd given up on dating a long time ago—you knew that you had already found the love of your life, and he just happened to be Lily’s boyfriend.
But, of course, you’d never tell anyone this. Lots of people were confused because you seemed so fine being single. But you thought that Lily, one of your best friends (at least, by association), would know that you weren’t really interested in meeting anyone. 
You sat with Lily in a restaurant overlooking the coast, the balcony having been rented out by Oscar for one of your last dinners. You all were waiting for him and Lando to join you, passing the time by ordering wine and appetizers.
“He’s cute, isn’t he?” Lily said, gesturing her head to your waiter that was walking back into the main restaurant. 
You didn’t really know what to say. You glanced at him through the glass wall. “Lily, he most definitely plays for the other team, if you know what I mean,” you joked, reaching for a slice of bread on the table. “I didn’t know that was your type.”
“Well I don’t mean for me, I meant for you.”
You chuckled. “For me?”
“Well, yeah. Don’t you want to get yourself a hot Italian man?”
“I’m perfectly happy being single.” You tried to diffuse the awkward conversation, keeping a kind tone in your voice as you ate the bread and looked into the distance at the coastline.
“Oh, come on. We’ll get you someone, don’t worry.”
“I really am fine being single.”
“You know who else is single?” she asked, clearly ignoring your protests. “Lando!”
You laughed aloud. “Oh God, no. If I wanted to be cheated on, I would have stayed with my ex. Besides, Oscar would kill him.”
A curious fact: Oscar had never approved of a single person you had ever introduced him to. You had to spend hours talking him out of running over your ex with his F1 car after you found out about his infidelity. 
“Oh, who cares what Oscar thinks? I think you should go for it,” she said, watching as the waiter returned to pour your glasses of wine. 
“Lily,” you said, holding your glass, ready to take a sip, “I don’t want to be in a relationship, like, at all. It’s just…not for me.” You sipped the wine, but through the reflection on the glass, you could see that Lily had pursed her lips in an expression you couldn’t quite read.
“If you want me to stop third-wheeling you and Oscar, you can just say so,” you joked as the boys made their way to the balcony to join you. 
You didn’t know it, but your joke cut deep in Lily’s heart. 
Nothing was said about it during the dinner, but Lily’s strange energy continued. It quickly became uncomfortable how much she was pushing Lando and you to interact. 
And when you all made your way to a local nightclub after the dinner, it didn’t get any better. Lando quickly got himself lost in the crowd, and you were once again left to be the third wheel. 
You could tell that Lily was getting annoyed, but to be fair, she was also annoying you. 
“Go dance with Lando!” she shouted over the thumping bass. She gestured to the opposite corner of the small club, where Lando was currently making out with some random Italian woman. 
You pointed this fact out to Lily, who just grimaced. 
“Do you just want me to go away?” you joked.
“Yes!” she said, and you were taken aback, because she was definitely not joking. 
Oscar was at the bar getting drinks, far enough away that he couldn’t hear. To be honest, you didn’t even want to be in this club anymore. 
So you snuck out and began your walk home without telling any of them.
As you walked along the cobblestone streets, Oscar handed Lily a drink, pausing when he noticed that you weren’t there to receive yours. “Where’s YN?” he asked.
“She wasn’t feeling well, so she headed back,” Lily said. 
“By herself? Should we go check on her?”
Lily wanted to roll her eyes. “No, she’s just tired. C’mon, let’s go dance!”
Oscar obeyed, but couldn’t ignore the feeling inside him that something about this whole night had been odd. 
The next time he saw Lando, he decided to say something about it. 
“Hey mate, are you going back soon?” he asked. Lando nodded, clearly tipsy. “Can you check on YN? Lily said she wasn’t feeling well.”
“Sure,” he said, annoyed at the mention of you again.
He did come back to the house soon, but with an equally drunk and giggly woman on his arm, the same girl he had been making out with in the corner of the club. 
You didn’t expect any of them for a long time, so you sat in the living room of the AirBNB, watching the waves cascade into the shore, romanticizing this complicated feeling that coiled itself inside of you. 
That was, until Lando stumbled in. 
His eyes got wide as dinner plates upon seeing you. The girl on his arm giggled and walked off into the nearest bathroom. 
“Hey YN,” he slurred. “Are you dying?”
You laughed. “I’m fine.”
“Lily said you were sick.” 
“Nope, I’m good.” 
He looked to the closed door of the bathroom. “Sorry about that,” he said.
“You’re fine. I’m…uh, not interested, anyway. I don’t know what Lily’s been on about today.”
“Oh, thank God,” he exhaled. You laughed, despite the sting of rejection in his relief. “Well, I’ll keep it quiet.”
“I’ve got headphones.”
You made your way to your room and put on your noise cancelling headphones, passing the time by scrolling and catching up on work emails, before falling asleep.
You didn’t sleep through the night, instead waking up in the early hours of the morning, when the sun was just beginning to round itself along the golden coast. You left your room to get a glass of water, not expecting to see the rest of your friends in the kitchen.
Lily looked hungover as hell, leaning her elbow on the counter, her hand resting uncomfortably on her forehead. Oscar was leaning against the counter on the other side while Lando sat at the bar next to Lily, drinking something out of a mug. His flight home was going to leave soon. 
You nodded to your three companions as you sipped your water glass, feeling the tension around you like an oncoming migraine. 
“You feeling okay?” Oscar asked. “Lily said you weren’t doing well last night.”
“Ah, just tired,” you answered. Lily had lied to both Lando and Oscar. That was a conversation for another day. 
“Well rested now?” Lily asked, her voice tinged with anger and fake sympathy.
“I’m fine,” was all you could answer. You glanced at Oscar, who gave you a knowing look. You had no idea what had gotten into her.
“Are you feeling okay, Lily? You look like you’re about to throw up,” you said, a more genuine concern in your voice.
“I’m fine too,” she said, clearly not fine.
Lando’s Uber pulled up, and you took the opportunity to help him transfer all his bags in one trip.
“Do you have any idea what’s going on with her?” he asked as you heaved the suitcase up into the trunk.
“No idea,” you answered. “Before you all got to the restaurant last night she was being…weird. For the record, I didn’t put her up to any of that.”
“I figured as much. You’re not the type.” Lando was right—it was common knowledge that you were happily single. 
“I’m sorry if it made you uncomfortable. For the record, it made me uncomfortable too.”
He exhaled. “Eh, we’re cool. No hard feelings, yeah? I’m sure she’ll snap out of it.” 
“I hope so,” you said, giving him a wave as the car disappeared into the winding roads of the coast.
Back in the house, you could hear Oscar and Lily whispering to each other. You wanted nothing more than to disappear and act like this weird night and morning had never happened, but unfortunately, you had to cross through the kitchen back to your room. 
A hush went through the room when you entered. You walked as quickly as possible through the kitchen, but were stopped by a voice.
“YN,” Lily called. “I think you should leave.”
“Lily—” Oscar interjected.
“I was just going back to my room anyway,” you explained.
“That’s not what I meant. I think you should go home.”
“Lily, don’t do this—” Oscar pleaded. You just stood in shock.
“Actually, let me clarify,” she continued. “YN, I don’t want you here. Go home.”
“Lily!” Oscar interjected. “Don’t say that.”
“No, it’s fine,” you said, even though it was definitely not fine. “Let me pack and I’ll be on my way.”
You turned and continued back to your room, fully prepared to do as you had just said. But Oscar followed you.
“YN, wait. Stay,” he said. 
“Oscar, it’s fine.”
“I am so sorry that Lily said that, but I want you here.”
“Look, I don’t know what’s going on between you two or why she’s so upset at me, but if someone tells me to go, I’m not going to overstay my welcome.”
“Still, that was so rude.”
“I’ve got thick skin. I won’t cry myself to sleep over it.” You looked out the window to the coast. “Look, I’ll just find someplace else to stay. A hotel for a few nights is cheaper than trying to reschedule my flight, anyways.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t worry about me, Osc,” you said, patting his shoulder. “Go talk to her, figure out what’s wrong.” 
He sighed, scratching the back of his neck. “I already know what’s wrong. She’s mad that we don’t spend enough time together.”
“Then go spend time with her.”
“That was the plan! But, I mean, I’m pissed that she said that to you. And she spent all day yesterday trying to set you and Lando up, which was fucking weird.”
“Yeah,” you exhaled with a twinge of laughter. “Look, with my record I can’t exactly give you love advice, but I don’t mind leaving. You all clearly need some space, anyway. Just text me if you need anything, okay?”
Oscar gave you a flat smile and nod. 
You packed and quickly booked a private room at a local hostel for the next few days, planning to enjoy the last few days as a solo trip. You truly didn’t care, but in the back of your mind, you hoped that everything would be okay. You never received that text from Oscar. 
Back at the house, Oscar and Lily were alone. And neither of them were happy.
“Just fucking go with her if you’re that mad,” Lily said, egging Oscar on. He had always been slow to anger, but he couldn’t deny that he was pissed.
“What is wrong with you?” he questioned. “Why would you say that to her? Do you understand how rude that is? And not to mention the fact that you were being fucking weird with her and Lando all night.”
“Oscar, I’m not having this conversation right now.”
“No, I’m pissed!”
“And, as usual, it’s all about your feelings, hm?”
“What are you talking about?” 
“Don’t act stupid. Do you know how much I’ve put up with because I don’t want to hurt your feelings? Every vacation, every race weekend, she’s always there. And I put up with her because she’s your friend, but I don’t like her, Oscar.” 
“What did she do to you?” he asked. But Lily couldn’t answer. It wasn’t like there had been a specific incident or falling out; in fact, you had always been kind to her. Lily’s silence was all the answer that Oscar needed. 
“You knew that YN and I were a package deal from the beginning.” 
Tears came to Lily’s eyes. “But this was supposed to be our trip. Just us.” 
“Lily, they were only here for a few days. I specifically set it up so that we’d have 2 weeks to ourselves after they left. Is that not enough?” 
She was silent, at first. Then came a question out of left field. 
“Were you going to propose?” she asked.
Oscar made a face. “Propose?”
“I thought the point of the trip was that you were going to propose.” She looked away, trying to hide her tears. “I’m tired of feeling like an outsider in my own relationship. I’m sick of YN third wheeling, so I thought if I set her up with Lando, maybe she’d leave us alone for a while.” Her voice was tinged with an angry mocking. 
She continued, softer, “Oscar, I want to be your wife, I want to grow old with you—”
But Oscar had little sympathy for her. “That’s really what all this was about? Lily, I’m not proposing any time soon.”
“We’ve been together for nearly five years.”
“I know. But with the season starting soon—”
“There’ll always be another season, another race. Is your plan to just marry me when you retire?” The sarcasm had returned to her voice. “Do you even want to marry me?”
“Of course I do. But we’re young, we have time. I’m in no rush.” 
“I feel like you don’t care about what I want at all.”
“Lily, I’m trying. But I feel like you want me to cut off my best friend and settle down at 22. You’re asking things of me that I can’t give you.”
“Then why are we even doing this?” Lily asked.
“Because I love you, and I want this to work! But Lily, you can’t treat my friends like that. If you’re angry at me, talk to me, but don’t take it out on them. YN is an important part of my life, too.”
“I’m well aware.”
Oscar sighed. “I don’t know what you want me to say.”
“I’m going back to bed,” Lily announced, leaving the conversation altogether. 
When she woke up, her head was pounding. Oscar was asleep beside her, his back towards her, no warmth even in his unconscious state. She had slept through the entire day—the moon hung high in the sky. 
As she quietly made her way to the kitchen and got some water and a snack, the memory of what had happened came back, rushing over her. She felt horrible. 
The sleep and food had reset her mind. Make no mistake, she was still upset at Oscar, but what he had said was right—she shouldn’t have taken it out on you. She needed to make it right. 
She texted you. Hey YN, are you awake? I’d like to talk. In person, if you can. 
Only a few minutes later you responded, affirming that you were available and sending the address of your hostel. Lily got there quickly, quietly walking through the rooms to your private room in the back. When you shut the door behind you and you both sat on the bed, she broke down. 
“YN,” Lily began, “I am so sorry about this morning. Truthfully, I was upset at Oscar and I took it out on you, and I shouldn't have. I was so rude.”
“It’s okay,” you assured.
“No, it’s not,” Lily interjected. But she seemed at a loss for words. “I just… sometimes, I feel like I hardly get any alone time with Oscar anymore.”
“Because I’m always there?” you joked, not knowing how close to the truth you really were. Lily didn’t respond. “Look, if you want me to take a step back, I can do that.”
Her response was quiet. “Would that be too much to ask?”
“No.” But it was, in a way. You felt your heart shatter into a million pieces, but your expression gave away nothing. “I understand.”
“I don’t think he loves me anymore,” Lily confessed. You normally didn’t want to know the details of their relationship, because the truth was too heavy to bear. But it seemed cruel to cut her off. “I feel like he never wants to be around me, like he prefers his work and his friends over me. I want to get married and he doesn’t. He keeps saying it's too soon and he’s busy, but it’s been nearly five years! I mean, how long does he want me to wait?”
You felt uncomfortable, not sure how to comfort your best friend's girlfriend. So you were honest. “I don’t know, Lily. I don’t know what goes on in Oscar’s head any more than you do.”
“Yes you do,” she replied. “You’ve known him longer.” Her eyes filled with tears. “I think he’s in love with you.”
“No, no, no,” you said, wrapping Lily in an embrace as she cried. “No, he’s not. He loves you so much.”
“No,” she echoed. “He doesn’t.”
You didn’t know how to respond. You just held her. 
At one point, your phone buzzed, illuminating the screen. Some unimportant notification, but you noticed the date and time more than that. It was past midnight; Valentine’s Day. 
The third instance was during the first weekend of the 2025 season; the Australian Grand Prix.  
You hadn’t heard from Oscar since the trip. You didn’t really know what to say, and part of you was dreading having to speak to him, knowing that your mere presence was now a strain on his relationship.
Of course Lily wanted more time with him. It made sense. You were present at…most things, actually. But Oscar always invited you, and besides, they lived together. If you had known that you had overstayed your welcome, you never would have gone in the first place.
But on the other hand, you and Oscar had been a part of each other’s lives for nearly double the time that Lily had been around. It wasn’t a competition, but you couldn’t shake that sour feeling that rested in your stomach, that if given the chance, Lily would want you gone for good. 
Regardless, between the trip and the grand prix, life went on as normal. It was odd, since your job was literally running all the official OP81 media pages and merch website. You couldn’t not be a part of his life—you made your living by posting memes about him on the internet and organizing all his merch sales.
So, naturally, you went to nearly all the races to take photos of fans, the paddock, and the garage. It was one of your favorite parts of the job. 
But Australia was different. It was Oscar’s home race, and a place full of memories for you. 
Your family had moved to Australia when you were only seven, having absolutely no friends, except the sweet boy next door in your cul de sac. At first he was cold. You thought he hated you. But you were nothing if not stubborn. 
You remembered it like it was yesterday; for Christmas, you asked for a pink motorized jeep, just like the black one that Oscar—the neighbour boy, back then—had. You squealed for joy when you got it. And the very first thing you did was challenge him to a race.
He ignored you. So you rammed your car into his, causing both of them to break. Ever since, somehow, you’d been inseparable. 
Your parents traveled a lot for work, so instead of constantly going with them, you found yourself staying with the Piastri family for months at a time. Nicole truly felt like your second mom, and Hattie was the sister you never had. And Oscar was…Oscar. It was impossible to describe the bond between you. 
Your parents were never too keen on Oscar, though. They kept it quiet when you were little, but as you grew, their dislike became more outward.
He was 14, leaving for boarding school in the UK. When he told you, you cried. That’s the only time he ever saw you cry.
You wanted to go with him, but your parents couldn’t afford it. He promised he wouldn’t let your friendship die, and he was true to his word. When he got into the higher formulas in racing, he helped you get your job so that you all would never be that far from each other again. 
But your parents always said he was using you, stringing you along, exploiting your labor. Though you’d never admitted it to another soul, they knew you well enough to understand that you loved him. 
You cut your parents off a long time ago. 
Sometimes the fans were worse. Half of them loved you—the half that understood that you could give them access to your idol—but the other half of them called you a beneficiary of nepotism, a gold digger, or a homewrecker. You learned at a young age to develop thick skin. 
And it was how you both behaved on race weekends that really exemplified the difference between you and Lily. 
You liked to be everywhere at once—in the garage trying to interpret the engineers’ technical jargon, in the grandstands taking photos of fans, in the pitlane shooting the shit with the race stewards. You always wore Oscar’s merch, and you wanted to be in the middle of all the action.
Lily, in contrast, was more reserved. She always looked put together, and frankly stunning, at all her appearances. She preferred to watch the race from the comfort and privacy of McLaren hospitality, and when she did interact with fans, she was respectful but short, very conscious of her space.
Neither of you were better or worse than the other. But no one could deny that you were polar opposites. 
You got to Australia before Oscar himself did, having been invited to spend a few days with your surrogate family before you’d have to stay in the hotel, per F1 employee policy. Nicole had told Oscar, who you assumed had told Lily, and when you didn’t hear anything for a few days before you were meant to fly out, you thought everything was fine.
Of course, you thought wrong. 
You spent 3 days with Oscar’s family, relishing the warm feeling of belonging that you’d missed. The Piastri guest room felt more like your own childhood bedroom. Of course, Nicole asked how you’d been, but you were politely distant, wanting to respect the fact that Oscar and Lily’s relationship was none of your business. 
When the pair finally landed in Australia and made their way to Oscar’s childhood home for the night, though, things worsened. 
When Nicole got back from picking them up from the airport, you were in the kitchen prepping dinner. Hearing the front door close, you looked up and smiled, greeting the group.
“YN! What are you doing here?” Lily asked, her voice tentative. 
Nicole answered for you. “Oh, she’s been here since Sunday. I’m so happy to have all my kids under the same roof again,” she joked, turning to Oscar to reach up and pinch his cheeks.
Lily just gave a pained smile. 
You didn’t know what to do. You hadn’t talked to Oscar in nearly a month. You wanted to honor her wishes—but it seemed like her wish was for you to vanish into thin air. 
The rest of the night you were unusually quiet, trying to blend into the background. It wasn’t difficult for Nicole to notice that something was up, but she knew better than to bring it up in front of the whole table. 
After dinner she wanted everyone to gather in the living room and watch a movie, which you quickly bowed out of, complaining of exhaustion. 
As the credits rolled, Nicole leaned over to whisper to Oscar, “Is everything okay with YN?” 
Lily overheard and interjected, “She’s fine.” Nicole raised an eyebrow. 
Oscar responded, “The home grand prix is always busy for her.”
The answer wasn’t sufficient enough to crush Nicole’s suspicions, but she didn’t have any more time to pry as her son and his girlfriend quickly decided to retire for the night themselves. 
The next morning, as everyone was packing to get to the hotel, Nicole decided to ask you herself if everything was okay. But predictably, again, you just said that you were fine. And the morning was so hectic that she didn’t really have the time to interrogate you.
Once you all got settled and to the track for media day, work mode took over, and you forgot all about the tension at the Piastri family home. Though you quite literally were paid to follow Oscar around all day, you felt more like the paparazzi than his friend, hardly ever speaking to him.
And as you went back to the hotel room alone to edit and post for tonight, you felt like a stranger in your own body. 
You didn’t want to do this anymore. You missed your friend, but more importantly, you missed being yourself.
But what were you supposed to do? You loved Oscar. Oscar loved Lily. Lily hated you. 
You were stuck between three impossible choices: stick around and be forced to subdue yourself into a shell of your true personality until Lily decided she wasn’t upset at you anymore, lose everything you’d ever built by quitting and moving away like you knew she wanted, or continue being yourself and possibly cost Oscar the love of his life. 
Yeah, this was a wonderful predicament you found yourself in, through no fault of your own.
You moved like a zombie through the free practices and qualifying. When it was finally time for the grand prix, you assumed your usual place in the McLaren garage, for work if nothing else.
But then, Oscar won. 
No team rules. No convoluted strategies. Just Oscar doing what he did best.
You couldn’t hear your own thoughts over the shout of the garage and the crowd in the distance, cheering out for their hometown hero. You ran out with everyone to the barricades to greet your best friend.
Though he still had his helmet on, you could see the effects of his smile in his squinted eyes. He pumped his fist in the air, cheering to himself before running to the barricades to jump into the waiting arms of the crowd. You cheered with them, overwhelmed with pride. 
Oscar locked eyes with you, cupping your face with his gloved hands and pressing the top of his helmet to your forehead. “I did it, YN!”
“You did!” you yelled, smiling ear to ear. 
Of course, people took photos. Photos that Oscar posted later that night. 
Lily didn’t like it—the sweet intimacy of the moment, front and center on Oscar’s Instagram page. Why would you post that? It was like you were taunting her. 
Lily sat on the edge of the hotel bed while Oscar showered, both of them preparing to meet you, Lando, and a few McLaren team members to celebrate his win. 
When Oscar emerged from the bathroom, Lily asked him, “Osc, can you do me a favor?”
“Hm?” he murmured as he dried his hair. 
“Can you take down that picture that YN posted?”
“YN posted something?” he questioned, grabbing his phone. As his social media manager, you had access to all his accounts, but occasionally he’d post something himself, too. “I don’t see what you’re talking about.”
Lily pursed her lips. “The first picture from the post she made an hour ago.” 
“Oh, this?” Oscar held up his phone. “I posted that.” 
Lily was silent. 
“Why do you want me to delete it? It’s a good photo.” 
Lily just looked at him. Oscar sighed and archived the photo. “There, happy?”
His tone was much harsher than he intended, but to be honest, he was getting tired of the constant fighting, and his patience was wearing thin. 
Lily kept quiet, just silently going into the bathroom to start doing her makeup.
In the lobby of the hotel an hour or so later, you awkwardly stood with Lando waiting for the couple to arrive. Once again you were torn—should you miss out on celebrating with your best friend on his first ever home win, or should you go and strain his relationship further? 
You were just going to say screw it and go back up to your room when you saw Lily and Oscar walking towards you. Though there was no tension between them, there was no love either. They both just looked…tired. 
Everyone had decided to keep it relaxed for tonight, just doing a nice group dinner with Oscar’s family. It was fine, albeit a tad awkward, because you were sitting between Lando and some McLaren employees you didn’t know, at the opposite end of the table from Lily, Oscar, and his family. 
You knew this couldn’t continue forever. Something had to break. And it did, when you and Lando ended up back in Oscar and Lily’s room, drinking your way through a bottle of nice champagne. 
The alcohol seemed to have calmed Lando’s nerves, as he was actually normal with you. And Oscar was a blushy, smiling mess and he and his teammate laughed at something you couldn’t remember. 
You opened your mouth to say something, but the mood was ruined by Lily’s drunken slurring. “Oh my God, YN, just shut up! Go away!” she giggled and grabbed Oscar’s arm. 
Usually, you were calm, letting any infraction roll off of you like waves on the beach. But the alcohol emboldened you. 
“Lily, what the fuck is your problem with me?” you asked.
The mood shifted, and Lily gave you a look of disgust. “I was just joking, God.”
“No you weren’t.” 
Lando chimed in. “Well, I think I gotta call it a night.” He got up and patted Oscar on the back. The two men stood up to walk out, leaving just you and Lily alone in the hotel room. 
“I don’t know what the fuck your problem is with me, but don’t act like there isn’t one. It’s obvious that you don’t want me around, I don’t know what I ever did to you.”
Lily had clearly been sobered up by your seriousness. Still, she burst into tears. 
“I’m sorry. I don’t know why I keep doing this.” 
You sighed, unable to keep your anger in the face of her cries. She continued, “I just… Oscar and I were each other’s first everything. First love, first kiss…first time. I love him so much.”
“I’m not trying to steal him from you.” 
Lily was quiet, and so were you. Something she had said gave you pause. 
They were each other’s first everything—no, that couldn’t be true. 
Because you were Oscar’s first. 
It had been many years—you were both 18—and you had never spoken about what happened. But you remembered. 
He came back home for Christmas from the UK. It was before he had even met Lily. 
You welcomed him home with an embrace—even with the frequent phone calls you had, you couldn’t help but miss your best friend, now here before you, in the flesh.
Neither of you could sleep that night, and somehow you both found yourself in Oscar’s childhood bedroom, quiet in the early hours of the morning.
Though it was warm outside, Nicole had a habit of keeping the house frigid, so you and Oscar huddled together under the handmade quilt that decorated his bed. The moment was tender and quiet, together in the soft darkness. 
“Do you like it in the UK?” you asked him, your question searching for a genuine answer. 
“It’s okay, I guess. It’s what I have to do for the races.”
“But do you ever get…lonely?”
He paused. “Yeah. Sometimes.”
You traced small circles on the skin of your leg. The closeness of the moment was uncomfortable. 
“But you have friends, right?”
“Yeah, but they’re not, y’know, friends for life.”
“I get you.” You really did, not having many friends of your own since Oscar left. “But you must have a ton of girls, though. They all want the cool race car driver.” You smiled, trying to use your humor to lighten the intimacy of the moment. 
“No,” was all he answered. “And if I had a girlfriend, you’d be the first to know, anyway.” In the dark of the room, you could only see the outline of his features, but you could feel the pull of his eyes looking at you. “What, do you have a boyfriend? Is that why you’re bringing this up?” he asked. 
“Of course I don’t.” 
“What do you mean, of course?”
“I mean, why would I have a boyfriend? I have no friends and half the people at school think you don’t even exist.”
“What?” he laughed.
“Well, yeah, when I say my best friend drives race cars in the UK, most people think I’m making you up.” 
“Shit,” he laughed. 
“So, yeah, it doesn’t exactly get me dates,” you laughed. You felt your throat stiffen. “I haven’t even had my first kiss or anything.”
The silence in the room was thick. “I haven’t either,” Oscar confessed. 
You found it hard to believe. Oscar was handsome, funny, everything a girl could want. Neither of you had ever been social butterflies, though. 
Under the blanket, Oscar reached for your hand, placing it in his. Your heart was beating out of your chest; you had never even held a boy’s hand. 
“We could just…do it now,” he said. “Just to get it over with.” He feigned his usual nonchalance, but you could feel the increase of his heartbeat and the ever so subtle tremble in his voice. 
It would be easy for you to laugh it off like a joke. But you knew it wasn’t. And you wanted him. 
“Okay,” you said, your voice breathy with nervousness. 
You sat up on the bed, and saw the dark outline of his figure leaning towards you, gently tilting your head. 
And when his lips met yours, it felt like home. Like everything in your entire life had left you up to this moment, here in the warmth of your best friend’s childhood bedroom.
The kiss lasted longer than you anticipated, but when he did pull away, it was too soon. You were grateful for the darkness that hid your expression. But even without the light, Oscar could see the truth behind your eyes.
“We could…keep going.”
“Okay,” you repeated. 
One of his hands found your waist now, pulling you closer, as his other hand pushed back your hair that had fallen in your face.
Once again his lips met yours. It wasn’t like a spark within you—more like a calming, a sense of peace and safety. Of all the boys you’d crushed on before, Oscar was different. You trusted him with everything. 
And you showed him so. 
He slipped his tongue past your teeth, tentative, as if he was scared to do the wrong thing. But you let him close the gap, your own tongue gliding along his, goosebumps going down your back the closer you got. 
He wanted to put his hands all over you, but he was nervous.
He pulled away. “I…don’t really know what I’m doing.”
“I don’t either. Is it actually your first time?”
“Yeah. You don’t mind me being your first?”
“I trust you.”
So you both took it slow, taking each other’s hands where you wanted to be touched, not focusing on anything but the other. 
The love you made was quiet and simple, beautiful yet imperfect. But you didn’t need perfect. You just needed him. 
The next morning, you slipped out of his room before anyone was awake, afraid of what would happen if they found out.
But no one ever did. Oscar never said a word about it ever again, and neither did you; after the holidays, he went back to school and met Lily, and the rest was history. 
But you remembered. And as you sat in that hotel room years later waiting for him, you felt numb. 
By the time he got back Lily had calmed down, but you couldn’t stand to be there anymore. You announced your departure, but Oscar decided to walk you out, too. 
You closed the door behind you, but Oscar pulled you to not leave so quickly. 
“Hey, is everything alright with you and Lily?”
“No. It’s not.” 
He sighed. “I don’t know why she’s being like this.”
You just stared at him, your face blank. 
“What,” he asked, “don’t tell me you’re mad too.”
“Was Lily your first?”
“Huh?”
“You heard me.” 
Oscar looked over his shoulder. “I’d really rather not talk about this in the hallway…”
“So do you want to go in the room and talk about it? In front of her? Because you lied to one of us. Which one was it?”
“YN, it’s—”
“Which one of us did you lie to, Oscar?”
He let out a sharp exhale, knowing there was no way to escape your line of questioning. He leaned down to whisper to you. “I didn’t lie to her. She just…assumed, and I never corrected her.”
“That’s still lying.”
“You really think I should go in there and tell her the truth?” His voice dripped with frustration.
“Yes. She deserves to know.”
“You know why I never told her? Because I knew this shit would happen, she’d get jealous and try to push you out of my life. If I tell her now, she’ll make me choose between the two of you.”
“Do you blame her?” you asked, astounded at how Oscar could be so clueless.
“Seriously?” he retorted. “You think she’s justified in doing all this to you? The entire reason she’s mad is because she knows if she tries to make me choose, I’m not choosing her.”
“Don’t say that! Oscar, she’s your girlfriend. You should love her.”
“I do. But things just…aren’t the same anymore. It’s like she wants me to change my whole life for her. I can’t do that.”
Unbeknownst to you, Lily got up from the bed and walked to the door, pressing her ear to it, where she could faintly hear you and Oscar arguing. 
“What she doesn’t know won’t hurt her,” Oscar continued. “And if you don’t want her to split us up, just let me handle it.”
“Oscar, she deserves better than this. I’ve missed spending time with you, but… you’ve got to tell her the truth.”
Lily opened the door. “I knew it,” she said, her eyes full of tears. “I knew you were cheating.”
Your eyes were wide as dinner plates as Oscar cursed to himself. “Lily, I swear to God that is not what happened—”
“Don’t. Don’t even try,” she said, but Oscar pushed his way back into the room anyway. He looked back to you, and even without words, you knew it was time to go. You needed some sleep.
Unfortunately, Oscar would not be getting any sleep tonight. 
“Oscar, just stop lying to me! I’m tired of this!’ Lily cried, curling her legs to her chest as she sat on the bed.
“Lily, I swear, I have never cheated on you. What YN and I were talking about was something from a long time ago.”
“We’ve been together for five years!”
“Can I just explain myself? Please?”
Lily just broke down in sobs. “Do whatever. I don’t care anymore.”
Oscar sighed. “Look, I…I have lied to you. You weren’t my first. YN was.” He looked at his girlfriend, who was still just silently crying. “It was before we even met, and it was just once, and we’ve never done anything since. I would never cheat on you, I love you and—”
“When and where was it?” Lily asked, cutting him off with her statement more like a command than a question.
“The December before we met, when I came home for Christmas.”
“In your bed?”
He nodded.
“Oscar, I slept in that bed next to you the other night.”
He said nothing. 
“Why are you doing this to me?” she asked, her voice cracking. “Haven’t I been good to you?”
“Lily, I promise, I love you more than anything.”
“Then why would you lie to me for five years?”
Oscar took a deep breath and said, “Because I was afraid you would be upset. People don’t understand that me and YN are just friends. I mean, we were raised together, she’s like my sister.”
“You had sex with her. You took each other’s virginity.”
“It wasn’t…like that.”
“How can it not be like that? Do you even hear what you’re saying?” 
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to say.”
About an hour after you left, you heard a knock on your hotel room door, and you answered. It was, of course, Lily. 
“Tell me whatever Oscar wouldn’t,” she said. Her eyes were still puffy and red. 
You welcomed her in, beginning to tell her the entire truth. “Oscar and I had sex when we were 18, before he met you. We never talked about it afterwards. After you met I didn’t want to bring it up, I just assumed he’d do the right thing and tell you. I didn’t want to pry into your relationship.”
So, your stories matched. And Lily knew that you were nothing if not honest. 
“Do you love him?”
“Of course I do, he’s my best friend.”
“No, I mean, are you in love with him?” 
You didn’t answer immediately. What were you supposed to say?
Tears fought their way to the corners of your eyes, but you blinked them away. “I don’t know,” you began, but that was a lie, you did know. “I guess…I have a special type of love for him. We grew up together. When we were younger, yes, I wanted to be his girlfriend. But then he met you, and… Lily, he was so happy! I just…I realized that I wanted him to be happy more than I wanted him to be mine. So I made peace with the fact that this is how it had to be.”
Lily was overwhelmed with your honesty, in the face of so much deception. 
You continued, “I don’t blame you for being upset at me. Oscar should have been honest about what our friendship was like from the very beginning instead of lying to you. But I swear, we haven’t done anything while you all have been together. I’ve been cheated on and I know how much that hurts, I would never do that to anyone else. I’m so sorry it ended up like this.”
“No,” Lily said, “You’re the only one who’s been honest with me throughout all of this. Thank you.”
After that, you hadn’t heard from Oscar after that for a long time. Or, at least, a few weeks felt like a long time to you. But you had other pressing matters—your workload was through the roof with Oscar’s wins. Lando had snatched himself a win too, setting up an early battle for the championship. It was too early into the season to call it, but you knew Oscar was feeling the pressure with the possibility of his first championship dangling so close in front of him. So you kept your distance, not wanting to be a distraction.
That was, until he called you, saying just those three painful words.
“Lily left me.”
The sun was cresting over the horizon, illuminating the thick glass of your balcony and flooding light into your living room. You hadn’t gotten an ounce of rest. 
From your bedroom, you could hear Oscar snoring. You just let him sleep. 
God knows you both needed it. 
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ditzydoe444 · 3 months ago
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MDNI 18+
rewarding jason in his truck ( ˶ˆ꒳ˆ˵ )
age gap! jason x innocent! reader
jason todd smut part 1 - part 2 wip
you had gone on a few dates with jason now during the summer, and the two of you had gotten quite close. he had taken you down to the beach nearby and was driving you back home. despite the age difference between you two, conversations flowed quite nicely, never any awkward silence. “so sweetheart, how did you find the date?” jason asked, his gaze quickly drifting away from the road to stare at you.
you smiled shyly, there was just something about having a bigger and older man talking to you and giving you attention. “it was really good, i liked the beach,” you replied, gently tugging your skirt down. it was summer and you had decided to wear the filmiest mini dress ever, the material was so thin it rode up every second. you turned to face jason to see his response, but you swore you saw his gaze was on your legs before quickly returning back to the road. “that’s good, i want to make you happy,” he responded gruffly, his knuckles turning white from how hard he gripped the steering wheel.
the two have you have only kissed, growing up in a sheltered household you rarely knew anything about sex. jason knew and respected your boundaries which you were respectful of. though after talking to some of your friends who asked about your sex life and whether or not the two of you have slept together, you couldn’t help but become curious about what it is. hence why you spent countless nights locked in your room watching the filthiest things, a man fucking a girl on all fours spanking her, a girl getting her mouth fucked and more.
slowly, you couldn’t help but get turned on, the slight damp patch on your panties was what started it. you touched yourself thinking about jason, what it would be like to have his huge arms wrapped around you whilst he fucked you like the guys did in the videos you watched. so for the past week, you found yourself shoving your fingers up your tight cunt pretending it was jason’s. though you couldn’t help but to feel slightly guilty, this was a new thing for you and it almost seemed scandalous.
you turned your gaze back to jason who was focused on the road. he was big. one of his thighs was big enough where you could sit comfortably, his biceps were huge essentially the size of your head. his hands were large enough to encircle your whole waist, so you couldn’t help but wonder how big he was under his pants. though you quickly snapped out of your thoughts when jason spoke up.
“what are you think’ about sweetheart?” he asked softly, making your cheeks flush. “nothing,” you shrugged, “i just really liked the date that’s all,” you smiled. he let out a low chuckle, “i really enjoyed the date too,” he grinned kissing the back of your hand that he always held when driving.
suddenly you have an idea, an idea you clearly shouldn’t be thinking about. you fidgeted in your seat, deciding if you should even act on it. jason had been treating you so well for the past few weeks that it would be nice to give him something back.
slowly, you kissed the back of his hand, not missing out on how he gave a lazy grin at the touch. “feelin’ affectionate today hm?” he asked. you shouldn’t, but god you really wanted to. slowly, your hands reached out to his lap, touching the leather belt softly. “what are you doin’ sweetheart?” jason asked lowly, his voice more gruff.
“saying thank you,” you smiled shyly before you clumsily fidgeted with the belt. after you finally removed the belt, throwing it in the back seat you unzipped his pants. god, he filled out those pants so well. they weren’t tight by any means, slightly on the bigger and bagged size, but god jason was so big you could see how his thighs looked when he sat. “you sure about this sweetheart? you really don’t need to do this.”
you didn’t care, god you were soaked through your panties you were pretty sure you were going to leave a mark on the truck’s seat. you felt the outline of his hard cock, and god was he big. usually you would’ve been shy, and god wouldn’t even think about doing this, but you were so eager to please him. you tugged his boxer briefs a little lower until you freed his cock.
he was big, a good eight and a half inches if not even more, and his fat tip was already leaking with precum whilst two prominent veins went from the base to the tip. he was a greek god. slowly you pumped your hands up and down on it, gaining a hiss from jason. “sweetheart,” he groaned. seeing him at your mercy turned you on, and god the idea of sucking him off whilst driving? you were soaked.
slowly you leaned closer, bending over the center console. this wasn’t a comfortable position but you didn’t care about your own needs right now. you licked up from the base to the tip, tasting the slightly salty liquid. you then slowly took him in your mouth inch by inch, and your eyes started to water from his sheer size.
“fuck sweetheart,” jason groaned at the feeling of your wet mouth on him. it took you a while to fully adjust to his size, your mouth stretched out beyond belief. you were already making a mess, your saliva coated his cock, whilst it dribbled down your chin, and your hands were wet and sticky from it. you hummed in contentment, as he took one hand rubbing the back of your head.
you continued bobbing your head up and down, occasionally gagging. however, you pulled back when you felt the car stop. looking up both disorientated and a mess you saw how he had pulled over on the side of the highway. “come on baby,” jason said breathlessly as he patted his thighs. obediently, you followed, straddling him. “you made a mess,” he grinned, seeing the sight of the passenger seat with a damp spot.
you let out a moan when he slipped his hands under your panties, rubbing your clit. “such a pretty little thing and all wet for me, hm?” a whine let your mouth when he ripped your panties off, and shoved your dress up, exposing your bare cunt. “think you can take my fingers sweetheart?” he asked softly, one of his hands caressing your cheeks.
nerves settled down your stomach, but jason was so soft and understanding that you didn’t feel judged. shyly, you nodded. “knew you could do it,” he grinned, his fingers playing with your pussy here one sank in slowly. immediately your grip tightened on his shoulders, your face scrunching up. “i know sweetheart, i know, just a little bit and i promise it gets better alright?” jason cooed softly, kissing your tears away.
it wasn’t long until you adjusted, bouncing and riding his fingers eagerly. you were pretty damn sure you could come on his hands alone. “j-jay,” you whined, your knees buckling ever so slightly. “i know, i know,” he gently whispered, his hands encircling your waist, rubbing the area softly. “you can do it, just don’t stop or hold it on ok?”
though you struggled with not holding it in, the feeling was weird, something unsettling. “what did i say about holding it in?” jason spoke, narrowing his eyes seeing how you were denying your own orgasm. you shook your head, tears streaming down your face, “c-can’t jay,” you whined pathetically. “you can, and you will,” he said firmly. the moment jason pinched your clit you came hard. god you were pretty damn sure you saw stars.
you sank onto his chest, clinging onto him like your life depended on it. “knocked you out with one orgasm?” jason chuckled, his large hand gently rubbing your back. “you’re gonna need to work on your stamina sweetheart, ‘m gonna give you more than one.”
you looked up, you were a complete mess. your hair was stuck to your forehead, mascara running down your cheeks with your lipstick was all smudged. “more than one?” you asked weakly, you were already limp from his fingers alone, how could you possibly take his dick and another orgasm?
“yeah baby, what kind of man would i be to just give you one orgasm?” jason gave a smirk, you already felt his fat tip nudging your cunt. “come on, you looked so good right now, it’ll be a crime to not take you again.”
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spideysbruh · 4 months ago
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bed chem
a/n- based off bed chem by sabrina carpenter. also I want a bf bro 😔💔💔💔💔
~~~
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liked by florencepugh, rachelzegler and 321,277 others
y/n what a wonderful night ! 💕
view all 21,277 comments
rachelzegler MY BEAUTIFUL BEST FRIEND
ynsmusic DID YOU FINALLY MEET TIMOTHEEEE
popyn i saw on the livestream that they were near each other while in line for the carpet, so I hope so !! she's been a fan for so long 🥺
ynsbeatbox you never ever miss
@ynupdates just tweeted- y/n seemingly liked and then unliked a post from a timothée chalamet fan account on tiktok!
@ynsblanket replied- DONT AIR OUT HER BUSINESS LIKE THAT 💀💀💀💀💀💀
@shawnxyn replied- it's okay girl we've all been there 😭
@saturdayyn replied- she's real asl tbh
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liked by florencepugh, tchalamet and 345,678 others
y/n i bet we'd have really good....
view all 34,277 comments
rocketyn ARE THESE NEW SONG LYRICSSSS !?!?!
uptownyn she's too gorgeous bro omg
ynjoel new album!?!?!
windyn GOOD WHAT?!?!! WHATTTT DONT LEAVE US HANGINGGG
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liked by y/n, kidcudi and 5,177,827 others
tchalamet late post, being a co-chair was amazing. thank you thank you thank you.
view all 87,277 comments
laurieslaurence YOU AND BILLIE DID AMAZING
timmysmanager PLSSS you're so cute
y/n awesome
liked by tchalamet
@y/n just tweeted- been watching little women a lot lately and im pissing my sister off cause I keep randomly yelling "JO WE'VE GOTTA HAVE IT OUT"
@tinydanceryn replied- the way i have that whole scene memorized
@y/n replied to @tinydanceryn- no girl same I HAVE LOVED YOU EVER SINCE I HAVE KNOWN YOU JO-
@laurieslaurence replied- REALLL
@cineyn replied- you give amy march soooo much
@chiyn replied to @yn- nah fr her songs have such amy vibes
@y/n just tweeted- patiently waiting for my laurie laurence
@sweetyn replied- mhmmmm we know girl. you're waiting for THEE laurie laurence
@staryn replied- IT'S NO USE JO
@littleyn replied- she thinks she's slick LMAOOO
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liked by billieeilish, tchalamet and 435,277 others
y/n you make me wanna make you fall in love
view all 35,388 comments
ynscat she's rly active recently 😭😭WHO is she trying to impress lmaooo
bobyn are these lyrics or just a silly caption
y/n can't it be both?
bitchisback YOU'RE SO HOTTTT
ynsemo billie liked omg my pop princesses !!!!!
@timmyupdates just tweeted- Timothée seen with fans recently! He expressed how happy he was with the Met Gala, and said how he was able to meet some "really wonderful and beautiful people" thanks to it.
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@boneslee replied- he looks soooo good 🫦🫦
@lauriesvest replied- ughhhh I wish the livestream stayed on longer! I got fomo 💔😔
@timmysgreeneyes replied- WHO DID HE MEETTTTT
@ynupdates just tweeted- Y/n has once again liked a post regarding Timothée. This time it was a video of him walking around LA, while paparazzi asked about his love life.
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@shortnyn replied- "once again" is crazyyyy 💀💀
@lookingatyn replied- yall j loveeeeeee calling her out, huh 😭😭💀
@timoatreides replied- he looks really good there so I can't even blame her
~~~ 8 months later ~~~
tchalamet just posted a story!
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caption- Y/N !!!!!!!!!!
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liked by tchalamet, haileybieber and 782,288 others
y/n dream-came-trued it for ya
view all 54,266 comments
amoreenayn oh. my. god.
laurieamy BRO WHAT IS GOING ONNNNN
tchalamet so sweet
satyn I BEG YOUR PARDON?!
popyn so random... but at the same time, it makes SO much sense.
@ynupdates just tweeted- y/n and Timothée Chalamet seen today at a mall in Indiana, sources say they were holding hands and seemed pretty close !
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@eltonyn replied- very happy for them tbh, I think they suit eachother really well!
@rainyn replied to @eltonyn- I agree, I think they balance eachother out 🫶 they're a good match!
@kenzyn replied- guys let's remember that they only met a few months ago at the Met Gala !!!!! it's still extremelyyyyy early in their relationship/friendship/whatever this is.
@darlingyn replied to @kenzyn- I don't think they would share this much publicly if they weren't secure in their relationship
@tsgf replied to @darlingyn- or they're in the honeymoon phase
@dyltims replied to @tsgf- first of all, you're a weirdo. second of all, i think they're both mature enough to know what to share and what not to.
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liked by y/n, zendaya and 3,277,288 others
tchalamet 📽 🛏 ⚗️ 🧪 📽
view all 76,265 comments
viciousyn bed... science ?? bed... beaker ??? sleep science ? BRO WHAT 😭😭😭
ynslipgloss OMG THEY FILMED SMTH TOGETHEE IS IT A MV !!??!! FOR HER?!?!?!
pinkponyclub okay im invested now
timospaul if it is a mv HOW TF did they afford him 😭😭😭
lauriesvest he def did it as a favor for his gf 🤣🤣🤣🤣
confidentyn realll, it's not like he needs the extra cash anyway LMAO
y/n just posted a story!
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caption- 😳😳😳 atticus actually likes somebody omg it's a miracle.
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liked by florencepugh, y/n and 2,626,388 others
tchalamet 🛏🛏🛏👅👅👅‼️‼️‼️‼️
view all 87,277 comments
y/n where art thou?
liked by tchalamet
shortyn the emojis boy what the hell
tsgf ughhhhhhh
ynsbeatbox stfu hoe
tchalamet liked
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liked by y/n and 3,177,388 others
tchalamet woahhh
comments have been limited
y/n yeah I know what that means
tchalamet liked
tchalamet just posted a story!
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caption- 💋💋💋💋💋
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liked by tchalamet, rachelzegler and 918,288 others
y/n out of breath, got me scrolling like ooooo....
view all 50,277 comments
timmysgf basic
y/n funny how he's laying next to ME rn huh?
oppositeyn ATEEEEEE
tchalamet mmmmm
tchalamet im obsessed !!!
tchalamet camaraderie
ynxtimmy i sure hope his comments will make sense soon 😭😭😭💀💀💀
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liked by y/n, kidcudi and 3,277,488 others
tchalamet tonight. 11pm 🛏
view all 87,377 comments
ynsmagic FINALLYYYYYYYY
timmysgreeneyes the way this will change the trajectory of my life forever
florencepugh AHHHHHHHH
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liked by tchalamet, sabrinacarpenter and 1,277,727 others
y/n bed chem 😍🧪
view all 98,277 comments
tchalamet i am such a gentleman to you.
y/n liked
y/n ily baby forever 😍
pleasepleaseyn that's not what the song says...
ynsheadphones IM OBSESSED ITS SOXGOODDDD
timmylaurie there's no way he acts that way w you in private im sorry like what LMAOO
ynscat idk i believe it... lil timmy tim was a thing wasn't it
yndefensesquad DONT EMBARASS HER MOTHERFUCKERR
shortyn the way she's been teasing these lyrics for monthsssss she's wanted him from the get go 😭😭💀 real af
lauriesvest this is the sexiest timmys acted 🫦🫦🫦🫦 amazing thank you y/n
eternalyn her hard work does not go unnoticed fr
tchalamet just posted a story!
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caption- best artist i know... and the prettiest... and the funniest.
*
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kiwriteswords · 6 months ago
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KiWritesWords Masterlist
Last Updated: February 20th, 2025 *phew* Most Stories Also Posted to: AO3 Tag List Requests: Currently Open!
*: Includes Smut, 18+ Themes, NSFW, Etc. ^: From my 2,000 Follower Celebration **Note: In no particular order. To view from newest to oldest, please visit my tag #kiwriteswords**
My Favorites
Because You’re Just a Man* [Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader] Everybody Loves Somebody [Aaron Hotchner x Best!Friend!Reader’s Wedding Date] I guess you’re just what I needed [Aaron Hotchner x Reader x Marriage Contract] Like a Feather [Aaron Hotchner x Reader x Marriage Contract] The Girl Next Door* [Aaron Hotchner x Age-Gap!Neighbor!Fem!Reader] Wicked Game Series Masterlist* [Aaron Hotchner x Flirty!Fem!Reader] The Beauty and The Boss* [Aaron Hotchner x Bombshell Reader]  Professional Distractions [Aaron Hotchner x Secretary!Fem!Reader] Sweet Beginnings* [Aaron Hotchner x Shy!Baker!Reader] Something in the Way She Moves *[Jealous!Aaron Hotchner x Section Chief!Bombshell!Fem!Reader] It’s a Wonderful Life* [Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader]  In the Margin [Aaron Hotchner x Bombshell!Fem!Reader] It’s a Match [Aaron Hotchner x Non!BAU!Fem!Reader meet on a dating app] The Hard Launch [Aaron Hotchner x Age!Gap!Fem!Reader Drabble] Cosmic Rollercoaster [Aaron Hotchner x Mystical!Reader] My Funny Valentine [Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader at Valentine’s Day] Fog up the windows in the parking lot [Aaron Hotchner x Age-Gap!Reader] **
Shy!Reader:
Exposed*[Aaron Hotchner x Shy!Fem!Reader] A Gentle Beginning* [Aaron Hotchner x Shy!Fem!Reader] In The Quiet* [Aaron Hotchner x Shy!Fem!Reader] The Fear of Falling [Aaron Hotchner x Shy!Fem!Reader] I find myself runnin’ home to your sweet nothings [Aaron Hotchner x Shy!Fem!Reader] The Weight of Mistakes [Aaron Hotchner x Shy!Fem!Reader] And then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like, “I love you.” [Aaron Hotchner x Shy!Fem!Reader] Shades of Stubble [Bearded!Hotch x Shy!Fem!Reader] Untangling the Past [Aaron Hotchner x Shy!Emotionally Hurt!Fem!Reader]
Other:
Balances of Trust [Aaron Hotchner x Wealthy!Fem!Reader] Between Almost and Always *[Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader] If put to the test, would you step back from the line of fire?* [Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader] You showed me colors you know I can’t see with anyone else [Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader] A Quiet Kind of Care [Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader on her period] Unveiled [Aaron Hotchner x Secret Relationship with Fem!Reader] Something to be Thankful For [Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader on Thanksgiving] All is Bright [Aaron Hotchner x Grumpy!Fem!Reader at Christmas] I love you in a place where there’s no space or time* [Aaron Hotchner x FWB!Fem!Reader] A Season of Sunshine [Aaron Hotchner x Sunshine!Reader at Christmas] Winning Over the Kids [Aaron Hotchner x Forensic!Psychologist!Fem!Reader] Patient Fantasy * [Recovering!Aaron Hotchner x GF!Reader] No words appear before me in the aftermath [Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader x Miscarriage] Do you believe in life after love? [Aaron Hotchner x Haley’s Best!Friend!Reader] This slope is treacherous; I like it * [Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader x Hickeys] Envy is the bond between the hopeful and the damned [Jealous!Aaron Hotchner x Bombshell!Fem!Reader] Touch Me Like Nobody Else Does * [Aaron Hotchner x Inexperienced!Fem!Reader Meet Cute] Heartstrings Attached [Aaron Hotchner x GF!Reader x Navigating Jack’s Teenagehood] Finer Things [Simp!Aaron Hotchner x High-Maintenance!Reader] Let me hand you my love [Aaron Hotchner x Affectionate!Fem!Reader] To the Ends of the Earth [Protective!Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader] Full of Surprises* [Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader at a club] Let It Be [Aaron Hotchner x CIA!Agent!Fem!Reader in Pakistan]^ The Aftermath [Aaron Hotchner x FWB!Fem!Reader]^ Walked in and dream-came-trued it for ya [Aaron Hotchner x Popstar!Reader]^ The Guilt He Holds [Guilt!Ridden!Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader]^ Sweet Comic Valentine [Aaron Hotchner x Best Friend!Reader on Valentine’s Day]^ Matchmaker, Matchmaker, Make Me a Match [Aaron Hotchner x Teacher!Reader on Valentine’s Day]^ Our Secret Moments in Crowded Rooms [Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader Sexting]*^ Everybody Knows You’re All I’ve Got [Aaron Hotchner x Fem!Reader Dating] Birthday Revelations [Aaron Hotchner x Derek's Sister!Fem!Reader]
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darlingghoulette · 1 month ago
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walked in and dream-came-trued it for ya'
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Summary: You come across a fun surprise on a supply run and decisions are made to “spice things up” in the bedroom for you and Joel. You fuck about it. That’s the fic. Rated E.
Content tags: crack treated seriously for porny reasons, established relationship, Jackson!Joel, afab!reader, reader has a vagina, no other physical descriptions of reader, no use of y/n, brief discussion of body insecurity, pussy play, pussy pronouns, finger sucking, oral, unprotected p in v, Joel talks you through it because of course he does, excessive use of contractions because Joel is Southern and so am I, ambiguous reader age–she was alive before Outbreak Day so you can do the math however you’d like. I’d still say she’s younger than Joel because the demons in my soul command me to write Older Man Smut. 
Author’s note: this started as a conversation about having a majestic bush in the apocalypse and spiraled into an excuse to write smut. While this is hot, I 100% believe that Joel would want his girl all natural as the good lord intended, but hey, pussy is pussy. Just wanna say: your body is your own, fuck patriarchal standards for body hair. This is just for a lil fun. 
Read on AO3
It starts as a joke. 
You’re clearing an old beauty store on patrol, some old chain business that used to peddle expensive makeup and a million different types of skin care that all essentially do the same thing. It’s not the normal kind of place to look for supplies, but if there was anything you’d learned living through the apocalypse, it was to be resourceful. 
You and Maria had already found a decent haul. Shampoo, acetone, disposable applicators that could be used at the clinic. And no infected growing into the walls to be seen. So far, at least.
All in all, the mood was pretty high. Maria doesn’t patrol much, especially after having the baby, and a calm, successful trip outside of the walls was a welcome one. She’s not technically your sister-in-law, seeing as you and Joel aren’t married, but she’s the closest thing you’ve had to a best friend and sister since the end of the world. 
You’re trading lighthearted conversation as you browse the aisles, nearly ready to call it a day when you see it. 
A medium sized box, dented and dusty. One of those wax melting kits, a little pot with tiny beads of brightly colored wax pellets. You’re already kneeling down to see if all the pieces are still intact when Maria ducks around the corner. 
“All set?” she asks, shooting you an amused look while you dig excitedly into the box. 
“How long has it been since you’ve seen one of these?” 
The packaging has certainly seen better days, and the wax beads aren’t nearly as vibrant as they probably once were, but surely wax doesn’t go bad, right? For her part, Maria is regarding the contents warily. 
“Can’t say I’ve had the time to get a wax in the past, hm, twenty years or so. So, probably about that long.” 
It’s almost strange to think about how little things like body hair used to be a huge deal Before. You can remember the first time in middle school you felt embarrassed about how all your friends shaved their legs and you weren’t allowed to. Before you even realized it was just a commonly accepted societal norm and not worth the huge drag out with your mom who had bigger things on her plate than her kid’s race to puberty. 
Stupid shit like that stopped being important…well, ever, if you think about it, society’s expectations were bullshit and patriarchal by design–but especially after the world ended. 
“We should try it.” you joke, even though something about the idea is actually tempting. 
“I’m alright, thanks.” 
“Come on,” You’re already imagining wrangling it into your saddlebags. “It could be fun! The guys are out helping with the dam maintenance until tomorrow, we could have a girls night! Movies, wine, torture for the sake of beauty. The full ritual, you know?” 
“I’m with you for the rest of it, but I’ve made peace with my legs how they are.” You hadn’t necessarily had your legs in mind. 
Maria, genius that she is, correctly interprets the wicked grin curling your lips up slowly without you even having to say anything.
She snorts, amused, but in a way that’s absolutely laughing at you instead of with you. She’s good at that. “No.” 
“You don’t even know what I was going to say!” you defend, but she’s already shaking her head. 
“I’m not taking you to the clinic after you rip off something important giving yourself a Brazilian with a 20 year old kit.”
It’s your turn to roll your eyes at her. “Now who’s being dramatic? It’s not a rusty razor blade. It’s wax, Maria. I’ve just…you know. Never done that, even Before. And I’m sure it would be even safer with more hands helping…” 
“Ask someone else then.” 
“Like who? You’re the only person I’d trust. And really the only person I have besides the 15 year old whose dad I’m currently seeing, and we just got her to the point of somewhat tolerating our relationship, I’d really rather not jeopardize that.” 
The image of what a disaster that would be makes you both laugh, but there’s enough truth in the statement that you feel a twist of embarrassment at even the thought. Absolutely not.
“Besides,” you say, faux-innocence dripping from your tone. “Might be a fun surprise for Tommy. Spice things up after the baby?” 
The look Maria directs at you is flat and unimpressed, but you can tell she’s not actually annoyed. In fact, there’s a glimmer of something sharp in her eye that tells you she might actually be entertaining the idea. “We don’t need things spiced up, we’re doing just fine, thank you.”
Your nose wrinkles a little at that, you may have brought it up first, but that’s your not-brother-in-law she’s talking about fucking–
“But,” she continues on before your face interrupts her anymore. For a few beats, anticipation hangs heavy between you in the dilapidated store.
“But?” 
The pursed seal of her lips eases into a grin, mischievous and matching your own. 
“But it might be fun to see the stuck dumb look on his face if I sprung this on him.” 
You let out a sharp bark of laughter, imagining your own Miller with a similar reaction. Yeah, this thing is definitely coming home with you. Just in case, you know? 
*****
For the millionth time in the last hour, you shift awkwardly on the couch. 
It’s the next day after your patrol shift with Maria. The ensuing girls night you’d had turned into more of a get tipsy on the Bison’s good whiskey and goof the hell off night. It was good to see your friend so relaxed, you thought, she stayed so busy and stressed keeping the town safe and secure. A rare cutting loose was called for.. 
It just so happened that the liquor in your system also made the mysterious box you smuggled from the supply run a whole lot more appealing. 
It was a whole ordeal, including cursing, awkward stops and starts, and more drinks than was probably smart for people your age. Thankfully, Maria was more familiar with the whole process and did most of the legwork. Not the most comfortable or glamorous passtime, and you got to know each other in ways that you certainly hadn’t expected, but the results at the end…
You cross your legs again, the sensation of your clothes on bare skin is novel when you change positions. It was stupid, and way more painful than you’d expected. Something fueled by drunk decisions and committing to the bit for laughs, but you can’t deny…it feels kind of nice? Different. But nice. 
Still, in the light of day, a new anxiety is popping out after your rash choice to go all beauty-school dropout.
The sun has sunk deep into the mountains, throwing those picturesque oranges and pinks across the Wyoming sky. 
Joel’s due home from his overnight trip to the dam any time now. 
Leftovers you’d snagged from the dining hall are keeping warm for him in the oven. There were no dishes to wash since you’d chosen to spare him the fate of choking down something you’d thrown together. (And he would have, the kind hearted fool. You’re not the best cook, but he insists on eating whatever you make while you attempt to learn.) 
The book you’re reading hasn’t progressed a single page, you keep picking it up and putting it down without retaining anything, your mind too caught up in its spiral.
What if he hates it? 
Of course, it’s a stupid thought. You know he’s not the kind of person who would judge you for something small like this. Sure, it’s not how he’s seen you since you both got together. But some guys go crazy for this, right? It used to be the preferred style for some people, back in the day. Even if it’s not his, it’s just fucking hair. It’ll grow back. He’s told you over and over that he’d love you no matter how you looked, and more than that his actions speak for himself. He’s literally seen you crouched over a toilet and ralphing your guts out. He’s seen you at every worst you’ve had in the last five years and is still there. In comparison, this is such a laughable insecurity. 
What if he thinks exactly that, though? It’s not a dealbreaker, but what if he laughs at you, what if he thinks it’s stupid and childish and you’re trying too hard, what if he hates it, or what if–
The sound of the front door opening interrupts your–admittedly silly–crashout. 
“Baby?” he calls out from where you can hear him shucking off his work boots, starting the familiar routine of sloughing off the outside world for the comforts of home. 
“Living room!”
Before you can quite go back to riling yourself up, he’s behind you, curling down over the back of the couch to kiss you hello on the slope of your neck. Your head leans backwards, craning up at him above you.  
His presence is like a balm, you can feel the smile growing on your lips while you take in the soft look he’s gifting you in return. 
He’s ruffled, hair a mess from the blowing wind outside; the scent of horse and woodsmoke and sweat rolling off of him. It never fails that fresh-off-work Joel just drives you absolutely up a wall. There’s something so masculine and protective and natural about him when he comes home like this that makes you want to just jump his bones as soon as he walks in the door some days. 
Today’s no different. 
“Have a good weekend, darlin’?” He’s leaned down further now, grunting just a little at the probable murder its doing on his back, to kiss you on the forehead. It makes you huff a soft breath of a laugh out of your nose.
“Better now, but yeah, it was pretty good. Dinner’s in the oven.” you hum, watching him straighten back up and start shedding his coat. “If you wanna take a shower first, I’ll get you a plate.” 
He kisses you again in thanks, a soft peck to your temple, a large palm coming to cradle your jaw briefly to press you into the contact. It’s intimate despite being so tame, a gesture that makes something deep in your bones melt better than any on-TV passionate romcom kiss ever could. This is real and warm, and makes you feel incredibly silly recalling your anxiety from just a couple minutes ago. 
*****
It’s only after you’re both set up at the kitchen table that the anxiety and anticipation begins to creep back in, Joel fresh from his shower in sweatpants, you with your feet propped in his lap with a cup of tea while he eats his late dinner. 
He’s telling you about the maintenance at the dam, how the group of workers had a disagreement on how to set up the factory to better prepare for the Spring storms that’ll move through soon. And you’re listening, really, you are. Nodding along when it’s needed, adding commentary when the conversation lulls. It’s just…
You can’t help shifting in your seat occasionally, or shooting him quick glances, wondering about his reaction. It’s getting you all twisted up again, and you’re trying to decide when will be the best time to bring it up. You’re nearly bursting with it, ready to pop and just get it over with already and–
“Alright,” Joel sets down his fork. “What’d she do?” 
You blink, brought short by the sudden change in conversation. “Huh?” 
“What’d she do?” 
“I’m not following.” 
Joel looks at you, a deadpan expression on his face, one brow raised and–Oh, no, that’s his dad detective face. 
“You’re over there squirmin’ like a sinner in church and you can barely meet my eye. If it was something you did, you’d have broken by now because you can’t keep a secret for shit. Which brings me to thinkin’ Ellie pulled some kinda fool stunt and you’re trying like hell to cover for her.” he says, the corner of his mouth pulling up into an amused and exasperated expression. “I went by the garage first thing when I got back into town and didn’t notice anything, but she’s gettin’ better at being a normal sneaky teenager. So, what’d I miss?” 
You can’t help it, that breaks you. You laugh, spine uncurling from its ramrod position. He always finds a way to break you out of your spiral. Even if he’s a little off the money, there’s something about the fact that he’s so attentive to your moods that releases the balloon of tension that’d been growing in your chest for most of the day.
During your giggle fit, Joel just smiles at you, pleased to have unfurled the little wrinkle you get between your brows when you’re really stewing on something. The meal mostly done and forgotten, his hands move to massage your socked feet in his lap, tugging playfully.
“Nothing happened, but it’s cute how you think you could get me to snitch on her,” You snicker, kicking one foot out to gently bump into his stomach. “She knows where I sleep and I’m more scared of her than I am of you.” 
He laughs, mumbling a that’s probably smart under his breath before trying to weasel more answers out of you.
“Alright, if it ain’t that, then what is it?” 
“I have no idea what you mean,” you sniff. 
“Baby.” 
His tone is low and coaxing, only meant to prompt the issue out of you, but it has the effect of kindling embers in your stomach. He sits there with his broad shoulders and tousled curls fresh from the shower, hands doing magic on the muscles of your feet, oblivious for all the world that he’s just about the most attractive image of a man you’ve ever seen in your life. 
You sink a little further into your chair, using the foot that’s not currently in his grasp to rub along his thigh. Something in his eyes immediately darkens. 
“It’s a surprise.” 
Taking the opportunity where it’s given, his hand slips further up your calf, fingers just barely brushing the tender skin at the crook of your knee, fully exposed for him in the pajama shorts you’re sporting. 
“Don’t gotta surprise me, don’t need nothin’. Got everything I want right here.” 
You grin. “What if I’m part of the surprise?” 
He was already looking at you before, but the way his eyes rake over you now? It’s heavy, taking you in like the only water in a desert. As much as his gaze feels like a physical thing, you’d much prefer his hands. It’s that want that has you lining up the final shot. 
“I mean, unless you’re too tired from your trip. That would be fine, honest, it can wait until–” 
You’re cut off with a delighted shriek when he stands and snatches you up from your chair, leftovers forgotten on the table as a problem for tomorrow. 
Head still spinning from the rapid change in scenery, it takes you a second to recognize that he’s headed straight upstairs. He’s on a singular mission, as made clear by the clever hand on your ass that’s not just to keep you supported in his arms. 
Joel may be older than you, but goddamn, you always forget how fucking strong he is. 
The buttons of his flannel are irritatingly done up and your fingers are trying to get the stubborn bastard things open when he makes it to your bedroom and drops you to the mattress with a squeak. You barely have time to get your bearings back from the impact before he’s pressing down on top of you. 
“Missed you so much last night,” he offers, already pressing hot kisses to your neck, your collarbone, pulling at the stretched neckline of a shirt that’s his anyway. 
You nod rapidly in agreement, nerves fizzling with electricity before he even touches you. It’s always been like this. The easy, syrupy intimacy of everyday life that can snap on a dime, dropping you both into urgency and need like you’ve never felt before. And, indeed, you need him to fuck you already before you go out of your mind. 
In a dance that’s as instinctual as breathing, your legs wrap around him. Your hips undulate up into his so you can feel where he’s hard and just as desperate.
Joel pulls back to hover above you. One hand palmed around the back of your neck, tilting you to look up at him. Guiding you where he wants you. “What do you need, baby?”
You lick your bottom lip, brain catching up to his words. His eyes dart down to your mouth. 
“I-I want–” you start, breathlessly, but he cuts you off with a click of his tongue. 
“Don’t think I asked what you wanted, sweet girl,” he hums, thumb resting on your chin and pulling it down. Gentle pressure, you could absolutely break away if you wanted to, but you follow his lead, sucking the appendage into your mouth. “Asked what you needed.”
You try to get the word “you” out around your mouthful, and you must do a good enough job that it earns you a kiss to the forehead, a move that might feel out of place to anyone else, but it’s so protective and possessive and him it makes you want to fucking writhe to release the pressure between your legs. 
The slick sound of his thumb when he pulls it from you draws a sharp whine from your chest and he shushes you, hands dragging down and down and down your sides, coming to rest on your hips. Something about that wriggles in the back of your head, like there was something you were supposed to be doing here, but you’re way too caught up to remember.
“It’s alright. I gotcha, baby,” Joel says, heated and soft in his low drawl, and then he’s sliding your shorts down your hips. Hands sure and practiced, expert at playing you like a goddamn fiddle. Lips laying scalding, sucking kisses from the crook of your knee to the inside of your thigh as he eases your legs open and–
Stops. 
It takes a couple of seconds for you to realize that he’s not just pausing for anticipation. He’s full on halted down there, one of your legs still hiked up in his palm, staring down at you like…Well. 
You think the term Maria used was struck dumb.
You bite your lip to keep the laughter contained. It’s not very successful, because his eyes snap back up to your face after a snort sneaks out against your will. 
There are lots of sexier ways you could play this, probably, but you settle on grinning up at him. 
“Surprise?” 
The sound he lets out is more of a sharp exhalation of breath than anything, like it was kicked out of him. You think you hear a goddamn tacked on the end there, but it’s quiet.
“What prompted this?” he asks when his words find him again, eyes dropped back down to take in the sight. 
“Felt like a change,” you mumble, losing some of your previous steam. You can give him the whole story later, but despite being used to him seeing you all kinds of ways, something about direct eye contact with your pussy makes you wriggle uncomfortably. 
“You, uh. You like it?” You’re starting to feel that anxiety creep back in, especially since he hasn’t confirmed or denied, or said much of fucking anything to give you a clue yet.  
Something in your tone must give that away, because you can almost see him mentally shake himself–systems coming back online, you think to yourself. The next time his eyes catch yours, it makes your stomach go molten. 
“Like it?” he echoes. His fingers have started exploring, petting down your soft skin. Even just the gentlest touch is like a livewire, makes your entire body clench, and he huffs out a soft laugh. “More’n like it, you are…Christ.” 
He’s lowered your knee over his shoulder now, using both hands to make you lightheaded without actually touching where you want him.
“She’s so pretty, baby,” he coos at you, making you moan even louder when he caresses the tender skin on either side of your cunt. “You make her all pretty just for me?” 
You nod, words a knot in your throat. 
“She’s always pretty, though.” You can feel the hot breath closer now, mouth hovering just above where your nerves are on fire. The sensation has your hand snapping down and threading into his hair with a keening whine. “Prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen, an’ all mine.” 
And then he’s eating at you like a man starved. 
He’s always been enthusiastic when it comes to your pleasure, but like this everything feels heightened, sensitive beyond measure. His nose bumps your clit and your vision whites out.. 
His tongue is not just bullying inside you every few strokes, it’s licking at the soft, smooth skin wherever he can touch. He sets his teeth to gently drag across one of your folds and it sends you nearly howling with it, the pressure in your core ratcheting up so high that you feel yourself hurtling to the edge impossibly fast. Joel knows it, too. He knows your body better than anything else on earth. 
“That’s it,” When he pulls back, it’s only with scant inches between you still, dipping back in to lay kiss after kiss on your heated flesh between words, like he can’t stand to pull himself away. Two of his fingers take the place of his tongue, crooking up inside you exactly where he knows drives you crazy and thrusting. Fucking you through it with every trick he knows drives you right to the peak. 
“Good girl, take what you need, alright? Give it to me, baby, I got ya’,” 
You can’t do anything but comply. Chest heaving, crying out with your orgasm as he eases you down as effectively as he built you up, kissing around your clit because he knows the stimulation can be too much directly after.
You don’t even wait to get your breath back before you’re using the grasp you still have on his hair to yank him up to your mouth. 
He tastes like you. 
It’s your favorite thing to taste on him. 
Down below, past where his fingers are still petting at you, he’s grinding into the bed, trying to relieve the pressure where he’s straining against the seams of his sweatpants. The sight of it knocks enough sense back into you to start tugging at his clothes with urgency once more. It must amuse him greatly judging by the look he gives you. 
“Need something?” he asks, but smart man that he is, he’s already joining in to help you shove his clothes away, your hands too shaky from the mind-shattering orgasm still. “Got another one in you?”
“You gonna keep asking stupid questions?” you pant, and it makes him bark out a delighted laugh, genuine and deep, and it has you grinning in response, always secretly pleased when you make him laugh. 
It’s a practiced dance between you both; getting him undressed to match you, taking playful nips at the newly uncovered skin within reach, getting distracted by long periods of kissing until you’re so keyed up again that all you can do is pant against his mouth while he teases you. 
He’s slowly rubbing the head of his cock against your soft folds, a slick slide that echoes wetly in the room and it’s so fucking obscene you could vibrate out of your own skin. 
Up and down.
Up and down. 
Coating himself in you and…just feeling. Playing with you. Enjoying his surprise. You let out a whine, impatient and beyond your limits. 
“S’it feel good?” he’s toying with you, stroking along your skin everywhere except where you need him. He nudges against your clit and the shocky, overwhelming zip of it rocks a gasp from your chest that he must like the sound of because he does it again, hungry for it. 
“You didn’t answer me earlier, you think she’s got another one for me?” 
You’ve dissolved down to only nerve endings, too wound up to do much in response but grind up against him. 
“Feels so good, so soft and sweet f’me,” he groans, the head pressing in just that little bit, barely there, only needing just that little bit more pressure to pop past the resistance and into your body. “Why don’t you feel, baby? Reach down here and guide me in, feel how nice we feel together,” 
He grabs your hand, pulling it down between your bodies, grunting when you grip around him. It’s so slick and hot, a combination of the two of you that makes your stomach clench in anticipation. You try to guide him right in, desperate to feel him inside of you, but he resists.
“Slow, baby, slow, there we go,” It’s agonizingly drawn out, but he sinks into you finally, the position you’re in–one of his hands under the small of your back to tilt you up to him, your knees locked around him–combined with the glacial pace makes it feel so intense and fucking deep that you’re sucking in great lungfulls of air to keep from floating away. “Theeere we go, atta girl. Always take it so well,” he murmurs, breathless himself, shoulders tense. 
He’s petting along your side with his free hand, gentling you like a goddamn horse, and fuck does it make your eyes roll back. With anyone else it would probably feel condescending. With Joel it just makes you want to slam your hips down into him even more, get him to move already. 
He finally does draw back, right before slamming forward again and stealing all of the hard-won breath from your chest. 
Time is lost after that. A haze of slapping skin and moans. 
He adjusts his grip on you, both hands coming to rest on your hips to physically pull you into the force of his thrusts, propping you up and up until–
“Fuck!”
He hits that spot inside of you that makes your entire body jolt with electricity, and he grins, boyish and cocky. 
“There she is,” he’s relentless, angled perfectly to make you lose your mind, thumb coming up to rub perfect, tight circles over your clit in time with his strokes. “I’ve got you, baby, gonna let go for me?” 
Already keyed up and sensitive from your peak earlier, the overstimulation is tortuous and so, so good, already hurtling you towards another that you know he can feel impending by the way you’re tightening around him. 
You’re trying to hold on, drawing out the pleasure curling at the base of your spine, but he drops down, hips never stopping, thumb still a maddening pressure on your clit, and he bites at your chest. 
His breath is scorching hot and wet on your skin as he groans “such a good fuckin’ girl, fuckin’ come on my cock baby, s’all yours,” and he bites down on a peaked, puffy nipple. 
Your second orgasm of the night rocks through you, the force of it startling, your fingernails making deep grooves in Joel’s back as you ride through it. 
He’s cursing and holding you to him, hips stuttering with your cunt gripping him so tightly. Your end tumbles him into his own, emptying into you and fucking his come deeper on instinct. 
The room is silent except for your combined breaths as you both come down. 
There’s a pleasant buzzing in your limbs, a humming in the back of your mind as it comes back to the awareness that you still have a rather large man resting on top of you and that your lungs would quite like it if they could inflate all the way. 
You tap Joel’s shoulder and he adjusts, sweat-sticky skin peeling from you to move to the side. It’s not as gross to you as it maybe could be. You think that’s what love might be. 
He’s no sooner on his back beside you before you’ve rolled to lay against him, one leg tucked up over his, your chest flattened to his. Like space between you might actually kill you right now in the wake of your high. To his credit, he must feel the same, his palms skimming over your back, your ass, down to your knee and up again in a soothing circuit. 
Soon you’ll need to get up and run a bath. Currently, you cannot think of anything you’d like to do less than move from this spot. 
Joel kisses your hair, then your forehead, across your cheeks, anywhere he can reach, and you hum, absolutely in love with how touchy he gets after a good orgasm. The man may look big and bad outside these walls, but you have his number when it comes to post-coital cuddles. 
It’s because you know him so well that you sense something brewing, his thoughts a little too loud for your liking. “Everything okay?” 
He just hums, working a spot under your jaw with his teeth. 
“Joel.” 
“What?” 
“You’re thinking too hard.” 
“M’not.” 
“You are, I can smell the smoke.” 
He huffs, head dropping back to the pillow. “Cute.” 
“I know,” you pretend to preen, but drop the humor quickly in favor of propping up on an elbow to look at him. He doesn’t seem distressed, but he’s definitely chewing on something. “What is it?” 
His forehead is furrowed a bit, mouth curved to one side in thought. “You just…” 
Your brow raises, prompting. 
“You didn’t do all that,” he gestures at your lower half propped against him. “Just for me, did you?” 
You snort. “Didn’t hear you complaining about it a minute ago.”
He rolls his eyes. “I ain’t complaining, I’m just saying.” 
It’s on the tip of your tongue to tease again, maybe even get a little defensive as the nerves from before try to sink back in, but you refrain. You can see in his expression that he’s serious, trying to say something here that’s important, so you let him gather his thoughts. He sighs, appearing frustrated at himself that the words aren’t coming out right.
“You can do whatever you want with your body, not like you need permission from me. I just wanted t’say that you don’t need to do anything to change yourself for me. I know some people did that controlling shit Before, pushed their preferences on their partner, but I thought it was stupid then, too. I love the way you are no matter what, because it’s you, alright?” 
You blink at him, not expecting the heartfelt turn in conversation. 
There’s a hint of a flush under his tanned skin that has nothing to do with the previous vigorous activity. Talking about emotions usually does that to him, but he always makes a point of letting you know how he feels about you.  
You wax your pussy on a drunken whim because you think it’ll be hot, and this large, wonderful idiot of a man is worried you did it out of some obligation to beauty standards and wants you to know he loves you regardless. 
As silly as the situation is, you’re utterly, ridiculously charmed. 
You smile down at him, still propped on his chest. The perfect vantage point to see how his eyes get drawn to your kiss-swollen mouth. 
“And what if I said that I was just trying something out? Comparing differences, you know, to see what I like. Scientific, almost.” 
His eyes darken.
“In that case,” With a startled shriek, he has you flipped, back pinned to the bed once more. “Thinkin’ we should keep on testin’.” 
He’s creeping back down your body, focus resting on his come that has been dripping out of you, fingers scooping through the slick and pushing it right back inside where it belongs. It wrenches a shocked moan from you. 
“Joel, I can barely move already.” you whine. 
“Good thing I’m doing all the work, then.” 
His eyes are locked on the apex of your legs, greedily taking you in. 
“I ain’t done with you yet, pretty thing,” and you don’t think he’s talking to your face at all. 
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pboogerswbb · 2 months ago
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SO IT GOES - chapter 9
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Paige Bueckers x oc Warnings: language, alcohol, barely proofread Wordcount: 3.7K A/C: HEY BABIESS here's chapter 9 but SOME DISCLAIMERS - this fic does not follow the official irl Dallas Wings game schedule before someone comes at me. ALSO this is so short i am aware but next one will make up for it i promise <33 ily guys please send reactions again bc i miss those and they're my favourite ever <333 OK ILY
-
Before London
“Zari! Zari, come sit over here,” Trey’s voice yells as I enter the plane, walking behind Paige ready to head back to Dallas.
“Shit,” I mumble to myself, making the blonde in front of me chuckle.
“I gotchu,” she whispers, clearing her throat before her voice rises above the crowd’s. “I need some help with the gameday vlog! Sorry Trey!”
The man’s face falls, watching closely as Paige allows me to pass her to slide into the window seat. 
“Thank you,” I say under my breath passing the blonde, the smell of her deodorant comforting me as it enters my nose. Paige smirks, sitting next to me and pressing her leg shamelessly against mine. I want to press back. But I need to remember our rules. Friends.
Walking into the bus for the airport many eyes had been fixated on me. Since my panic attack yesterday I had been feeling off, not quite right. Wearing the tight, uncomfortable clothes I had packed seemed like a nightmare, so Paige had lent me her hoodie for the flight home. For the first time my coworkers had seen me out of work clothes, which made me feel a little uneasy. Paige could tell, always smiling at me reassuringly when I began to feel unsure.
“You look good in that hoodie,” the blonde next to me grins as I buckle my seatbelt, eyes watching my each move. I give her a warning look. She only chuckles, raising her hands defensively. “Yooo, in like a friend way.”
“Okay,” I laugh softly, buckling the seatbelt. From the corner of my eye I notice the blonde’s eyes locked on me, a slight smile on me.
“Soo, do I get to drive you again?”
I laugh softly, feeling a familiar ease with the girl return. Since our talk yesterday after I freaked out both our moods had miraculously lifted. 
“You want to drive me?” I ask amused. 
Paige nods with that familiar grin I’d missed so much. I’m so enveloped in her presence I don’t even notice the plane beginning to take off.
“Bro I love driving you,” she admits. 
“Really?” I ask. Almost embarrassingly needy.
Paige leans back in her grey Nike tech, resting her head on the seat. “Yeah Iz,” she hums. “Best part of my day.”
I look at her for a moment, meeting her eyes, feeling butterflies grow in my stomach. No, just friends Zari. I quickly look away, gazing out the window noticing we’re about to take off. Before I can even ask, the blonde is gripping my hand hard, sending jolts of sparks up my arm, thumb rubbing my skin soothingly. 
-
“Shirley temple, thanks,” I say to the brunette bartender, her dark eyes quickly finding me in the middle of the other players lining up along the bar. A wide smile spreads on the girl’s face as she takes my order, beginning to make it in front of me.
“You sure that’s all you want?”
The bartender is flirting, I can tell. She’s got that spark in her eye, that sweet grin on her face, that tells me she wants me. It tempts me for a moment, the idea of taking her to my hotel room and working her all night.
“What are you drinking?” Izzie’s voice interrupts my thoughts, the girl completely forgotten the second she enters my mind. Her hand grabs my forearm and instinctively I wrap it around her lower back pulling her to the bar.
“A shirley, whatchu want?” I ask, unable to take my eyes off her. The bartender huffs, continuing to make my drink eyeing the both of us but I don’t even notice. Izara looks so unbelievably stunning, in a brown halter neck top and a leopard print skirt, makeup flawlessly done but hair left naturally wavy - rare for the girl. There was an ease in her demeanor the past few days since we’d become friends again. And truthfully, I felt the exact same. Our game against Liberty had been a clear loss but at least I got a few shots in. I wasn’t overthinking the ones I missed anymore.
“A dirty martini. But I can pay for it myself Paige.”
“Shut up,” I laugh, ordering the drink for her and letting the bartender work, looking around the club. Some of the Liberty players had asked us out, and after a game that wasn’t a huge flop, I had been quick to agree, inviting Izara and the rest of the media team out with all of us.
With an easy coolness I pay for the drinks, tipping really well as I always did which seemed to cheer up the pretty bartender a little. 
“Thank you,” Izzie’s sweet voice whispers, sipping on her martini and stirring it. I wanna tell her she looks beautiful, especially in the dim lighting of the club, the purple hue painting her skin. But I’m not sure if it’s too much, so I stay quiet.
“Paigeee!” Stewie’s voice rises over the crowd as she passes Arike, Lala, Lou and others, greeting them with a wide smile.
“My Husky,” the woman smiles, hugging me with one arm. “I think you owe me a drink since we won.”
I laugh, rolling my eyes. “Bro with the way you were flopping the second I touched you I think you owe me one.”
We laugh together, when I realise Izzie is just standing there, staring at us two.
“Oh yeah, this is Zari,” I hum, my hand wrapping around the dark haired girl’s waist without much thought.
“My brother’s such a fan of you,” the girl grins, shaking hands with the woman. Stewie smiles and nods.
“He’s got good taste. Nice to meet you,” she chuckles, quickly ordering a beer before returning to the conversation. “Why didn’t you tell me you got a British girl Paige?”
Izara and I burst into laughter, my hand quickly falling from her waist. A touch was okay, but I shouldn’t linger. A look was okay, but gazing wasn’t. There was a fine line between friendship and more that I was learning to tread carefully. But the urge to slip was there, bubbling beneath the surface constantly. But anything was better than not having Izzie in my life. My best friend in Dallas.
“Bro, no we’re not together,” I laugh, watching as Izara covers her mouth while giggling. There’s a hint of the faintest blush on her cheeks, but it’s gone as fast as it appeared. “She’s our social media girl.”
“Oh shit, my bad,” Stewie laughs. Zari waves her off with ease, shrugging. 
“Here you are!”
Trey interrupts the conversation, grabbing Izzie’s arm with a tight grip and pulling her closer. My hand falls off the girl, and I can’t help the flex of my jaw as I watch the way the man is intruding Izara’s personal space. I don’t even know why he had to come. I think he should’ve just stayed at the hotel. Why did he think anyone wanted him here? I sure didn’t.
“Oh hey,” Izzie chuckles as Trey throws his arm around her shoulder. It angers me. What angers me even more is that the dark haired girl doesn’t seem to mind. She remains still, sipping her martini, popping an olive into her mouth speaking to Stewie with ease. About what I couldn’t tell you. They almost look like a couple. I wanna kill him.
“So where’s Marta?” I ask Stewie, trying to refocus my attention.
“She’s at home with the kids, you wanna go sit down somewhere? It’s so loud here and I wanna catch up.”
I glance at Iz whose back is fully turned on me now, engaged in conversation with the brunette, brown eyed man. I think he’s 2 inches shorter than I am. That makes me happy.
“Yeah lemme get another drink first.”
-
After four martinis I can feel the way I’m losing control over my gaze. My eyes were stuck on Paige, sitting between Stewie and JJ, sipping on her drink and throwing her head back as she laughs. She looks stunning, in a slicked back bun, black denim shorts ripped on her thighs and an oversized t-shirt, silver chains dangling on her chest, diamond studs glimmering in the purple light of the club. My sight couldn’t move from the way Paige’s veiny hands are wrapped around the glass, her complexion tan from the Dallas sun of early summer.
“I could live here for sure… Like start a family here and shit,” Trey is speaking my ear off as always. If that man was good at something it was talking without needing a single reply. So I let him blabber. Not that I’m paying much attention to what he’s saying, mind far too wrapped on the blond sitting in the far corner.
“You want kids?”
This snaps me out of my tipsy thoughts, my head turning to the man. “Huh?”
“You ever want kids?”
Really not a conversation I want to have right now. Or ever with Trey. Why is he even talking to me about this? 
“Uh, yeah, I do,” I murmur and down my martini, letting it burn my throat satisfyingly. I don’t wanna think about it, about the life I gave up when I left Jasper. How even if I had a horrible husband at least I’d probably be pregnant, I’d be a mom soon. It was the one thing I had always wanted, to be a mom. Now I felt lost, worried I might never find that person for me - to have children with. I couldn’t bear to imagine it.
“Yeah?” Trey grins, revealing a row of white teeth. “How many?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” I chuckle awkwardly, putting my glass down. “Three, I guess.”
The man gasps, his hand grabbing my arm in excitement. “Me too! I want all boys. I could see you be a boy mom.”
I disagree so hard I can’t even fathom what’s coming out of his mouth. I always wanted a girl, more than anything. Trey clearly did not know me at all.
“Girl she’s so hot…”
I hear the two bartenders whispering to each other behind the bar. I snap my head towards them and notice both of the girls glancing towards, who else but Paige, and blushing.
“I know I’m straight but like… For her?” The red haired girl giggles. I roll my eyes, feeling annoyance rise to my chest, making it heave.
“Go ask for her number, she wants you for sure.”
“You think?”
“She was looking at your ass earlier.”
I feel hot in the face, angry, for whatever reason. I try to clear my throat to get their attention, to order another drink and partly to stop the conversation. But they don’t hear me.
“Fuck, okay, I’mma do it. Wish me luck.”
I watch as the red haired girl walks to the table, holding a tray of drinks I guess the group of girls ordered, obviously swaying her hips from left to right in an amplified way. Surely she was delusional, it would be stupid of Paige to be getting with random bartenders as famous as she had become.
It’s as if they move in slow motion, the girl leaning down with a bright smile placing the tray of drinks on the table. Paige’s blue eyes flash as she looks the bartender up and down and flashes that smug, flirty grin I knew much too well. The girl exchanges words with Paige, though I can’t hear over the thumping beat playing loudly. But from the looks on Stewie’s and JJ’s face I can tell it’s something flirty. The blonde digs her phone out of her pocket and allows the red haired girl to type what I assume to be her number in it.
“What can I get you?” The second bartender asks, as I lean against the bar, eyes sharp and watchful. I don’t hear her. I feel my face turn red, a strange frustration swelling up inside me. I wanted the girl to get away from Paige, my Paige.
“Zari? You tryna order?”
“Uh what?” Suddenly I snap out of my head as Trey taps me on the arm. The bartender is staring at me with expecting eyes. 
“Would you like something to drink?” She asks, her voice overly sweet. I decided I didn’t like her either, because why had she egged the red girl on?
“Uh, just a vodka soda, please,” I mumble, digging for my wallet.
“I got it,” Paige’s familiar, low voice murmurs from behind me, sliding her card smoothly to the bartender. I feel her front press into my back as she reaches over, the heat of her body making my mind spin.
“Thought you already got your drink,” I huff, and it comes off much more rude than I intended.
I feel the blonde chuckle soundlessly, her warm breath teasing my ear. “Need a straw,” she says, grabbing one from the holder set up on the bar. I feel irrationally upset, even more so now that she had paid for my drink. The moment it’s handed to me I scoff a quiet thanks, pushing off the bar and walking away with urgent steps. Paige is persistent as always, following close behind me like a puppy.
“Yo you good Iz?” She asks. The alcohol was hitting me, making my brain stupid and inconsiderate, words spilling from my lips before I could think them through.
“I don’t want to talk to you.”
Paige scoffs loud, still following at my heels as I hurry around the club aimlessly, trying to shake her off. I should know that was impossible with the blonde.
“What’s your problem?” Paige asks. I roll my eyes, but don’t answer. Frankly I don’t know what the answer is. I search my brain, looking for any valid reason or excuse for me to be mad. Because I couldn’t deal with the answer being that I have feelings for her. I just couldn’t.
“Nothing, just leave me be.”
Paige grabs my arm, stopping me and holding me still with ease and flipping me over to face her. My green eyes circle the walls of the club as we stand on the edge of the dancefloor, lights flashing purple, pink, blue, avoiding her gaze, her ocean eyes.
“Iz, what the hell is going on?”
I scoff again, shaking my head. “You’re being stupid. Flirting with random bartenders. You’re famous like actually famous. You need to be smarter Paige.” Good excuse. I almost believed it myself.
Paige furrows her brows, taken aback. “Bro, huh? Whatchu talkin about?”
“The girl you idiot!” I’m speaking with my hands now, flailing them everywhere, forcing the blonde to let go of me. “If she goes to the press it’s gonna be everywhere!”
“Who cares? I did nothin’ wrong! I’m single,” she argues back. She’s right. I was gonna lose this fight.
“Shouldn’t you focus on getting your game right first? Maybe that’s why you haven’t been doing as well, you’re unfocused.” It’s a low blow. I don’t even mean it. I knew how in her head Paige was about her games recently. I regret it the second it leaves my mouth. I should never drink again.
Paige goes silent, and raises her brows, kissing her lips with a bitter smile. “Wow Iz, fucking wow.” And she turns around and leaves me standing there alone.
-
“Hey, everyone’s start is hard. Don’t get in your head about it. You’ll find it.”
Stewie’s been staring at me staring at the floor and moping for the past ten minutes, sipping on my drink and biting my nails. Her words are so sweet that I don’t have the heart to tell her that my game is the absolute last thing on my mind. I’m still trying to comprehend the conversation between me and Izzie, the attitude she was giving me and wherever it was coming from, because I had no idea. I cross my legs, huffing and nodding as if to acknowledge Stewie’s words, though my head was filled with images of Izara’s stern face, the way she rolled her sharp eyes and crossed her arms over her chest, the way her voice sounded once she got angry. Everything about it had turned me on, insanely much. I’m really in it huh?
“Unless you’re Miles, now that girl’s been hooping,” JJ chuckles. Stewie nods with a smile, agreeing.
“Yeah she’s had a good start this season.”
JJ gets up, looking over at us two. “Anyone want another drink?”
I shake my head, still working on the fruity concoction I had ordered last. Once we’re alone, Stewie turns to me, studying my face.
“You good?”
I shrug, leaning back on my seat.
“Ohh, it’s a girl huh?” 
I grin and nod. “Always is.”
Stewie nods and looks around, watching the way my eyes glared over Izzie who was sitting next to Trey, looking at everything but me.
“It’s the British girl huh?”
“She’s…” I murmur, taking a sip of my drink. “She keeps me on my toes I’mma say that much.”
“Uh oh,” the woman laughs, clearly expecting me to keep talking. It works, the drinks making it easier for me to open up.
“Nahh, I’m playing. We’re just friends. But now she acting crazy over how I’mma ruin my public image or some shit by getting a girl’s number,” I groan. “Like she was forreal upset.”
Stewie listens with a small grin, nodding and glancing between me and the girl I was staring, my chest aching to touch her the drunker I got.
“I see that basketball IQ doesn’t translate to real life huh?” She asks. I don’t understand what she means. Reading my confused expression Stewie continues. 
“I don’t think she wants to be just friends. I think she’s jealous Paige,” Stewie nearly laughs at my ignorance. I’m about to get defensive, knowing this was a ridiculous thing to say. Why would Izzie, who wanted us to be friends, who kept rejecting me time after time, be jealous over me? But there’s no other reason, no other motive for her actions that makes sense. Izara is jealous over me.
-
I enter the women’s bathroom, trying to mull it over in my head. Had I had it wrong this entire time? Maybe Izzie had feelings for me, the same kind of feelings I had for her. She was just better at hiding it. The girl was always cool, calm and composed. Of course she was good at hiding it. It only makes sense. I walk to the sinks, watching my reflection in the mirror when Izzie opens a stall door, heels tapping on the marble of the floor as she walks to the sinks.
Her green eyes lock with mine in the mirror, her face still hard and stubborn. She’s not gonna talk to me, her gaze swiftly moving to the sink where she’s washing her hands diligently. Fine. If she won’t I will.
“Hey,” I say. Without looking at me she responds.
“Hello.”
I approach the girl, stepping closer to her. I needed to talk to her, I hated the coldness between us, even if it hadn’t lasted for longer than the past hour. Every minute we spent not together felt wasted to me.
“You thinking about heading back to the hotel soon?” I ask in hopes it would be enough to show effort for reconciliation. Instead she furrows her dark brows, turning to me.
“What you’re not gonna go home with that girl then?” She crosses her arms, green eyes even more vibrant in contrast to the black lining her waterlines. Not reminding me as much of the deep dark green of the forests back in Connecticut, but more so like the bright green of the first blades of grass pushing through the dead ground in the spring.
She continues before I can answer, face scrunched up in annoyance. “You know what, all those girls you bring home too, it’s so inconsiderate. It is so loud, it drives me insane! You should think of your neighbours once in a while, you know!”
Stewie was right. She’s jealous. Actually jealous of me with other girls. An involuntary grin begins to grow on my face, as I gaze down at the girl, loving the way she was a couple inches shorter even with heels. Thankfully the bathrooms are empty besides us two, because I’m too euphoric to even check.
“Honestly, it’s just being a bad neighbour and-” Izzie stops talking, noticing my expression, scoffing. “Why are you smiling?”
“You want me to stop?” I ask, my voice teasing.
“I- wh- pardon?”
My grin falls, expression turning serious, my voice turning low and genuine. “If you don’t want me with anyone else just say the word.”
Izzie’s eyes flutter shut for a moment as she takes my words in, cheeks beginning to redden as she comprehends them and what I mean.
“N-no it’s not that,” Iz murmurs, barely able to hold eye contact with me. “It’s just. So loud sometimes.”
I nod, stepping closer to her, our fronts nearly touching, electricity between us tingling, sending chills all over me.
“I’ll stop.”
“No Paige, you don’t need to. I don’t care about who you sleep with.”
“You don’t?” I ask, my gaze stuck on her face as her lips part to let out a shaky breath. She feels it just as much as I do.
Izara shakes her head slowly, never breaking eye contact. 
“Are you sure?” I ask, tongue swiping over my lower lip.
We stare at each other for a while and I can tell the dark haired girl is thinking it over, considering every detail before admitting to something that might end in a mistake. Just as she opens her mouth to speak, the door to the bathroom opens, a group of women walking in. I quickly avert my gaze, Izzie doing the same as I take a step back and clear my throat, feeling the burn between my legs return in a painful, desperate way.
Izzie takes a deep breath, turning her back to me as she dries her hand wordlessly. I watch her, her shiny black hair and the way it swings in the air, her long neck and jaw, the sharp slope of her nose.
As the girl takes steps towards the exit, walking past me I grab her arm carefully, but sternly, pulling her close.
“I mean it Izzie. Just say the word and it’s done. They’re gone. Just a word, ma."
Iz breathes heavy, looking at my face with heavy lidded eyes before nodding. I let go of her, my fingertips burning where they had touched her skin. The girl exits the bathroom, leaving me on fire, a tingling in my lower abdomen making me dizzy.
-
taglist:@wbbgetsmewetter@thaatdigitaldiary@pb524830@bueckersfive@lupinqs@sierrale8ne@d3arapril@lovegalor333@avvwritesstufff@rosemariiaa@bueckers22@taylynbueckers44@unadulteratedcyclepaper@rizzlerbuckets@wosolipa@bridgetloveswomen@paiges-1vur@slut4uconnwbb@xxloveralways14@bueckersbitch@janaelalfysblunt@omg-imtumbling@angryflowerwitch@ohbueckers @ohmybueckers
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patscorner · 8 months ago
Text
PAIGE SERIES RECS
=======================
these are some of my favorite paige series, some by my moots, some by amazing people that I haven't had the opportunity to talk to. I'll update as I find more, and feel free to send me some in my inbox.
[pride and prejudice]
[So high school]
[Right where you left me]
[anyone else]
[moth to a flame] (incomplete)
^ @pb524830
[Seven]
[I know it won't work]
^ @iminlovewithpaigebueckers
[You]-pazzi
^ @diamond-champagne
[U my Everything]
[First. Love.]
^ @delusional-day-dreamer
[Tru Fru]
[Talent]
^ @brenwritesss
[My brothers best friend] (incomplete)
[love beyond the likes] (incomplete)
[Drew's babysitter]
^ @sommerbueckers
[Shattered promises] (incomplete)
^ @mopopshop
[Teach me]
^ @sweetbans29
[Paper Rings]
^ @azzibuckets
[The Shock Factor]
[The Last time]
^ @asapeveryday
[ill be your temporary fix]
[Petnames and Airplanes]
[I can do it with a broken heart]
[she's such a good girl]
^ @bbydoll18xx
[In between the shades of Blue]-pazzi
[Golden Hour] (incomplete) -pazzi
^ @imaginespazzi
[yes I am changing]
^ @1for5
[close]-pazzi
^ @sellasstories
[she loves me, she loves me not] (incomplete?)
^ @girlokwhatever
[from the start]
^ @calicohearts
[sneaky link]
^ @arlertwhore
[invisible string] (smau)
^ @d3arapril
[pregnant reader]
^ @mascdestr0yer
[Hit me baby, one more time]
[Say My Name]
[You, Again]
^ @p0rtaled
[it was always you]
[Lines We Drew
^ @rosemariiaa
[what's my name?] (incomplete)
[two can play that game (both ain't shit)](incomplete)
^ @ohbueckers
[Take me to church] (incomplete)
^ @lupinqs
[power trip]
^ @sierrale8ne
=======================
taglist: @wintersstan @bueckerslover @lilia22hicks @fake-intelligences @girlokwhatever @pbloverr @breeloveschris-deactivated20240 @cosmopretty @hellokittyfeenie @averagelobotomyenjoyer @elliewilliamsthang @chelisbae @angelscovee @st4rrzynight
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