#tried not to be preachy or boring

[ouatnextgen]

If Descendants characters were apart of the next gen, what do you think their relationships with the other next gen would be (assuming they were the younger siblings of the next gen).

This is finna be a looong one.

Obviously all the siblings love each other, and all the older siblings are protective of the little ones, so I tried not to be too repetitive with the details.

The Mills:

Henry:

He has so many siblings now, oh god

Bobby is slightly more of a handful than he's used to, so he (and Lucy) keep him on his toes

Henry always asks Regina if he was like that as a kid, and her answer is always a smug "Yes"

Bobby likes spending time with Henry's other families (ie, his own and the Swan-Joneses)

Evie's a lot quieter, so he appreciates that

He's very protective of Evie specifically

She could ask him for the moon and the stars, and you know that Henry would find someway to bring them down for her.

Roland:

He knows damn well that Bobby looks up to him a lot, so he tries to put on his best act when he's around

Unfortunately, he is more susceptible to The Eyes than Henry is, so Bobby ends up getting away with waaaaay more stuff with Big Bro Roland

Like Henry, he is also very protective of Evie, and will be the one who teaches her how to kill a man when she's older

Basically, Evie is their little princess, and you don't wanna fuck with her

While Evie doesn't like camping, she will tolerate it when she goes with her father, brothers, and sister.

Robyn:

Robyn's just glad she's not the baby anymore lol

She's the least busy of her siblings, by default of being younger, so she's the one who gets to babysit Bobby and Evie when the adults are busy

She and Bobby like to practice archery and eat dirt together or whatever it is kids do

She's never been very girly, so she and Evie have trouble bonding at times

The Nolans:

Leo:

Leo likes hanging out with little kids, so he never minds babysitting Chad

He's very bossy, however, and seems to be allergic to fun, so Chad doesn't like it when he babysits

Leo can also be kind of preachy about the rules, so Chad will end up getting more lectures from Leo than their parents sometimes

Despite the minor animosity, Leo always wants to be a role model and someone to look up to for Chad

He likes to teach him sword fighting and archery, even when Chad has zero interest or skill for those things

Beck (I can't pick a name for this kid, for now it's Beck):

He and Chad go together like two peas in a pod

Beck's sarcastic outlook paired with Chad's optimism make a fully rounded duo

Beck encourages Chad to commit Crimes, and Chad is the Voice Of Reason

The Hermans/Boyds:

Alex:

Alex is pretty chill with Chloe

Alex feels like a disappointment to their parents, so she is kind of worried that Chloe might be their "replacement"

Chloe basically hero-worships Alex, and dyes her hair blue like how Alex dyes theirs pink

In the future, Chloe ends up being a jock instead of a girly girl, and she and Alex bond over their mother not knowing what to do with either of them

Charlie:

He and Chloe argue (a lot)

Charlie hates sports, and Chloe hates boring nerd junk, so they don't get along

They are the epitome of "only I'M allowed to make fun of my sibling!" If anyone else makes fun of either of them, they get the wrath of the other one

The Briarwoods (Aurora's Family):

PJ:

PJ gets along fine with both Ariana and Audrey

He and Ariana specifically love to banter back and forth, which is hilarious to witness since Ariana wins 99% of the time

He will have tea parties with Audrey and dress up like a princess, and he will slay whichever princess dress she forces on him

Arabella:

The girls aren't actually triplets (Ariana isn't even their sister), but they're so close in age and act so similar, that they're always called triplets

They all love princess stuff, and adore being actual princesses; they all want to move to the Enchanted Forest and have balls

When they get older, they sing a different tune, but stay close

The Swan-Joneses:

Henry:

He has so many siblings now, oh god

Harriett has given Henry a lot of gray hairs; more than Bobby, almost as much as CJ

He likes playing pirate with all of the kids

He always calls Harry 'Killian Jr.'

He's the one who bought CJ her red leather coat, to be more like Emma

He spoils them so much (The Mills kids too, but Regina already spoils them a lot) and always brings them gifts when he visits

Alice:

She loves having such a big family and so many little siblings

She shares her love of books with Harriett, stargazing with Harry, and painting with CJ

She's the sibling that gets sacked with babysitting duty, but she never minds

Hope:

Hope is the "cool" sibling, aka, she lets them get away with more shit than Henry and Alice do

She's part of the reason CJ is Like That

For whatever reason, she's Harry's favorite sibling, which sucks for her, since she's not a fan of little kids

The Golds:

Gideon:

Ben is very quiet, so he'll tag along with Gideon everywhere and no one will even notice

Gideon and Ben have a book club between the two of them

He feels kind of weird that Ben still has that "my dad is the best" attitude, but doesn't have the heart to tell him the whole truth

They tell each other everything, and despite the age difference, are very close

[hcneygemini]

sentence starters from my wip fics, pt. I

please do not add to this list nor repost the list as your own. tw: mentions of murder + attempted murder.

I just fell for that, didn’t I?

Is it because you like me so much?

I bet you regret this now.

Your heart’s pounding.

You’re too empty headed to know much of anything.

Oh, come on! I know something about seduction.

I know you’ve never heard of it, but some people have friends.

I don’t wanna hang out with the dork gang, though. Just you.

Yeah, well I’m an asshole, so we’re even.

I couldn’t sleep because you weren’t there.

Is that your way of flirting?

You’ve never gone to these lengths before.

You can be a real smart ass sometimes, you know?

I wanna see a different side of you today.

You made one mistake though—you didn't disarm me.

Kiss me.

You’re definitely not boring.

What are you thinking about?

We have to learn to confront it at some point.

Can you wait to kill me until I finish breakfast?

What’s the matter? Jealous?

I’ve never been more serious in my life.

[ Name ] won’t shut up about you.

Stop pretending to be mad.

It’s part of my evil plan.

I’m not repeating anything [ name ] told me in confidence.

You shouldn’t be so vulgar.

We both know we’re not a couple.

You can’t keep just walking away.

Stop being corny, I’m tired.

You look peaceful when you sleep.

I don’t think you think I’m serious. But I’m always serious!

I didn’t go looking for this.

I don’t like trusting people.

Please keep your feet off of my desk.

Wow, you’re so stoic and unafraid of threats!

How much of anything was real?

Was this the truth you wanted?

Past me had shitty taste.

You're so much more than that.

So, we were lied to.

This is really pathetic, you know.

Why should I go anywhere with you?

I have some ideas, but you have to trust me.

I see your cruelty's still intact.

Shit, you're really pale.

Would you stop trying to leech off of the traumatized children?

I don't have time to detail the extent of my work to you.

Why can’t you just talk to me like a normal person?

Yeah, well, I can deal with my shit myself.

Isn’t everyone so much happier without me around, stirring the pot?

I’m tired. Can your love confession wait until tomorrow?

No good deeds go unpunished, or whatever.

I got two people killed… er, technically maybe three.

Tell me another one of your preachy, boring life lessons!

Careful, I can hear the cogs turning in your head from here.

No one here is ‘okay.’

You didn’t have to come, you know.

We both know what I did.

Don’t give me some shit about ‘finding yourself’ and ‘healing.'

Hey, don’t think of it as bribing! Think of it as… a reward for putting my best foot forward.

Jeez, am I the only topic of the rumor mill?

You fell asleep on me.

I guess movie night is a good sedative.

I think I did something. Something bad.

Why do you have to make a joke out of everything?

You tell me yours, I’ll tell you mine.

Why were you so out of it last night?

You know, they’re not so bad if you would just get to know them.

Hey, where the fuck have you been?

Why would I forgive someone who tried to kill me?

Well, shit happens!

You’re either plotting to kill me in my sleep or you’re in love with me.

Are you asking me to stargaze with you?

Life doesn’t need to have some big meaning, I guess. I mean, I’m happy right now.

I come with tidings!

It's a cake that says, 'Sorry for trying to have you murdered!'

I can’t trust your big mouth.

What do you do when you disappear during the day?

I’ve never exactly been in a relationship.

At least take me out before talking about commitment.

Why do you spend time with me?

I’m learning more about you. The real you. And I… like [ them / her / him ].

Wow, you’re lame as shit.

Wait, so you’re seducing me by accident?

You two really like each other, huh?

Wow, your voice is so sexy in the morning.

[cynicalruins]

Changérion Bible - Toshiki Inoue interview

Translation by Windii, scans by me

-SPOILER ALERT FOR THE ENTIRE SHOW-

Scriptwriter: Inoue Toshiki

Inoue Toshiki, a scriptwriter who wrote all but two of the 39 episodes by himself, convinced everyone who knew of the work that Changéríon was of the Inoue World. How did he create this unique series that is unparalleled in the history of television?

―Was the birth of Changérion a request of the times?!

"I think the first time I met Shirakura was on location in Nagano for "Jetman". At that time, I only had the impression that we were just smiling and drinking whiskey together, and I had no idea that we would become such close friends (laughs). Later, there was the movie version of "Hakaider", but at that time, we were still finding out each other's real intentions and didn't trust each other. It was only with "Changéríon" that we came to a kind of mutual understanding."

―How did you come to work on the plot for "Changéríon"?

"At first, the idea was to do "Hakaider" for TV. So I was supposed to do the plot from the beginning. Then we decided to do something original instead of "Hakaider," and Shirakura and I came up with the idea of doing something like "Detective Tale'"."

―In your interview with "Uchusen," you mentioned that you had a project in which the main character was a fugitive.

"Yes, there was also an idea that it would be like "The Fugitive," a foreign drama. But both ideas disappeared during the course of our discussions, and we decided to make the main character a cram school teacher. But when I tried to make it into a script, it was boring, so I forced it back to a detective, and it got a lot of traction. We decided from the beginning to make it a comedy. Both Shirakura and I felt that the traditional handsome hero with a frown on his face, carrying his troubles on his back, was outdated and uncool. It was the demand of the times, or rather, something inevitable."

―Another characteristic of Changéríon is that it doesn't present any particular theme.

"It is annoying when a work is preachy or pushes a theme to the forefront. It is not good to start with a theme. It's the creator's complacency. It's just enough to look at the whole picture and see what's there and what's emerging. Writers have a bad habit of wanting to make a theme look like a work of art, but that's a big mistake. Everyone knows that love and friendship are wonderful, and viewers don't want to see that anymore."

―There is more slapstick than comedy in Changéríon, isn't there?

"To tell you the truth, when I wrote episodes 3 and 4, I knew that this is what Changérion was all about, and I wasn't sure about it at the time of episodes 1 and 2 (laughs). But after episodes 3 and 4, the staff was on board, and we decided to go with this route, and things just escalated. Slapstick works in animation, but I experimented to see how far I could take it in live action. It went surprisingly well. Director Konaka did a great job. For my part, I was surprised that Mr. Nagaishi found it interesting. I've known Mr. Nagaishi since "Supernova Flashman", and he was the first person to reject my scripts (laughs). I thought he was good at love, flowers, and other stinky stuff, and wasn't interested in comedy or slapstick, but that wasn't so at all. I thought he was a great guy."

―You have listed your challenging works, favorite works, and worst works in the "Changéríon Memorial" on Toei's website. Could you tell us about them in detail?

"The first one I had a hard time with was episode 10. I needed a lot of ideas, and slapstick is difficult to structure. And episode 14. I was kind of tired at the time (laughs). I wasn't a writer who worked that much at the time. I only wrote up to six episodes in a row for Jetman, and I heard that Mr. Suzuki (producer Takeyuki) told Shirakura that I was limited to a maximum of six episodes (laughs)."

―The inspired works are most interesting!

"My favorite works are episodes 10, 12, and 25. That's because they are interesting (laughs). Before I write a script, I write a structure chart, and in my case, I make it very carefully, as if the script is ready when the chart is finished (laughs). I think that's where episode 10 came from. When you make a chart and throw away the excess, you get inspired. The inspired works are most interesting. In episode 25, the exchange between the two disguised as old men in the last scene is great. I think it was inspired by something else… I wonder what it was."

―Which works left you dissatisfied?

"Episode 14 is well done, but in Changérion's world, it's trite. It's a story that could have been written by anyone but me, and I don't like that. For episode 13, I like the title, but it was a bit tawdry. Episode 11 had a diluted plot. The lack of length in the script made the pacing a little sluggish. They tacked on the lines after the fact, the stuff about Kuroiwa's profundity. It's like it came about by accident. I wrote Kuroiwa as a guy who is obsessed with things, but I didn't expect him to become such a man of extensive knowledge. Mr. Nagaishi was suspicious of the direction and added classical music, which was well received. I think the music was very important. The person who chose that music was great."

―Looking back on each of the characters, do you have any thoughts?

"Akira is representative of what everyone cares about. Like, you wish you could live like that. It's a man's dream, like James Bond in that sense. You don't want to be Kamen Rider #1, but you want to be Akira, right? (laughs)"

―Akemi and Rui were cast in contrasting ways, weren't they?

"I wasn't involved in the casting. Shirakura and I don't seem to have the same tastes, so he wouldn't invite me (laughs). Akemi is definitely better as a secretary. Akemi has her stuff together and can put the brakes on Akira. Rui is the type of person who is weird and presses the gas pedal together with Akemi, so the scheme is wrong, but when Akemi is gone and we need a new secretary, there's no point in having the same type of person. It was a desperate measure to create a more impactful character that would eclipse Akira."

―The verbal tics at the end of their lines are also memorable.

"I don't think that went over very well (laughs), but Akemi is a firm person, so it's not cute when a girl like that talks the way she does (laughs). I think it's just right for her to add "maybe" and make it sound lighthearted. For Rui's style of speech, she's the ultimate posh lady, so she's repressed and wants to be someone she's not. She has a bit of a split personality thing. As for Hayami, Aizawa's acting got better and better from the middle of the show, and it was great to see how serious Hayami became. Ichiyama, who played Munakata, was also interesting, but I didn't change Munakata's character to suit him. I was going to make him a strange old man from the beginning. Come to think of it, there is not a single decent guy in this show (laughs)."

―As for creating the character of Kuroiwa?

"I had a lot of trouble making that one, because he was going compete with Akira, so I was thinking about a guy who would set up a consulting office at DarkZide, who would have an office in the apartment across the street, and who would be enthusiastic about stuff, and that's how I ended up with that one. Ogawa was good at it, too. When he first appeared, he had a strong impact, but it was difficult to decide what to do with him after that, so I made him the governor of Tokyo. It's interesting, isn't it (laughs)? Kuroiwa was crazy about Eri until the end. He said he was going to conquer humans, but he really wanted to be a human. Sayoko is a character that was really created at the last minute because of the deadline. Shirakura told me that if I didn't write by tomorrow, we wouldn't be able to shoot."

―Not only Kuroiwa and Sayoko, but many of the DarkZide is very obsessive.

"They are all enthusiasts. You could call them single-minded or pure."

Which is reality in the last episode?

―What made you decide to make the last episode the way it was?

"It is often said that the "it was all a dream"-ending is a forbidden technique, but I have always wondered if it is really so. I thought it would be crazy if I did it for the whole series, but if I did it for one episode, it would be a mere "it was all a dream"-ending. I told Shirakura about it, and he was stupid enough to think that was the way to go (laughs)."

―It's often discussed which is more real, the world of the story you've been telling or the serious world.

"Well, that would be less interesting if the dream wasn't more beautiful. It is better that Akira in reality admires Akira in the dream."

―The world DarkZide is trying to destroy is the real one?!

"Of course it is. In the structure, the point where the story ends is reality. It means it was all a dream. That's why Changéríon is ephemeral."

―Looking back on the work that is Changéríon now, what do you think?

"Everyone was in a groove. It was strange that we were all going in one direction and no one was there to stop us (laughs). It is rare to see such a united group going in a different direction from what was expected, isn't it? The greatest asset for me was that I was able to meet the staff. I knew Shirakura and Nagaishi from before, but getting to know Kimura (YOMIKO Advertising) and Iwata (TV Tokyo) was a big deal."

―When looking at Changéríon, it feels like individual ideas and inspirations were highly respected, rather than a parliamentary system.

"Programs are more interesting when they are made that way. If one person says no, the initial fun will fade away. I think that not only dramas but also TV programs as a whole should be allowed to run amok. I think it's boring because everyone is satisfied with making a mediocre product."

―How was Changéríon able to run amok?

"Because my episodes were funny (laughs). No, seriously. Everyone was fooled. Iwata from TV Tokyo said he was fooled by me at the wrap party. But the deceiver wins."

(Here comes Kochihira Chika.)

Kochihira: I have known Mr. Inoue for 10 years.

Inoue: She was in the same office as Wakamatsu Toshihide, who played Gai in Jetman, and we have known each other since then. I have known Kochihira since she was 19 years old.

Kochihira: But Changéríon was a regular audition and I passed. I knew that it was your work, though.

Inoue: So when I heard about that after it was decided, I was surprised, too.

―What do you think of Kochihira from your point of view?

Inoue: Well, she has an attractive face and figure, and has been admired by everyone since she was a child…

Kochihira: You really think so? (laughs)

Inoue: It got interesting when your, or rather Eri's, feisty side came out in episode 3 (laughs).

Kochihira: After that, Eri got cuter and cuter, and in the end, she even became Elisa (laughs).

Inoue: It was fun, wasn't it?

And so the fun night continued. Unfortunately, we'll end it here for the sake of this issue of the magazine.

Inoue Toshiki: Born November 28, 1959 in Saitama. Made his debut in 1981 with Dr. Slump Arale. Since then, he has been active in both live-action and animation. His latest work, Masked Rider Ryuuki EPISODE FINAL, will be released on August 17.

Works: Supernova Flashman (86-87), Birdman Squad Jetman (91-92), Mechanical Violator Hakaider (95), Masked Rider Kuuga (00-01), Ironclad Machine Mikazuki (00-01), Masked Rider Agito (01-02), Masked Rider Ryuuki (02-on air)

[musicfeedsmysoul12]

Brutal Honesty Time: Dragon Age Companions Edition

Origins

I never really LIKED Alistair. No hate to those who do but I never vibed with him. He looked like my brother at the time I was playing so romance was OFF the table, but later when my brother grew his hair out ala Thor, I did romance him and while it’s cute I’m still: eh. I do think he’s best friends with some of my Wardens and do headcanon his relationship with Thea Surana is adorable (Muirin is not a good partner though.) but I just… meh.

Also, I cannot see this man as anything but straight and it’s just… I can’t. To me he’s the himbo lovable guy but he’s just not into dudes.

Wynne also never appealed to me in the sense that I felt she was preachy as fuck. She was to much a ‘older wiser mentor’ for the players and yet I felt that she was also the granny who was without a doubt to set in her ways. I have a headcanon that the Spirit of Faith that possessed her actually bound her to rigid rules. As such she cannot change really.

Dragon Age 2

Anders is to me right in his goals but I think killing him is still a reasonable reaction. I it really depends on who you play as but I’ve always felt that while I would be personally horrified the fact the Chantry did NOTHING to help the people they claim to watch over and the hell the Circles became are on their shoulders. Anders was RIGHT. But a Hawke killing him doesn’t make them wrong. Also he’s like my fifth fav romance in DA2. Yes I mean I like Sebastian’s over his. I just never clicked with Anders despite some epic lines.

Aveline as well I never… liked? To the extent others do I mean. She’s interesting but I was always wtf about her comments. She feels like a character they were forced to sort of shuffle into the story without finishing. Her entire Act 2 quest is atrocious (oh you must help her with a man really?) and I would love to explore her slowly coming to the realization that she was wrong in her actions/the system itself is broken. I think there’s a fantastic post going around to break this down firmly but I can’t really remember who made it. She’s a character I have to aggressively headcanon like Cullen to put up with.

Varric comes up to and for me… he is fun. He’s a fav for me. But I’m also sick of this guy. Most of my Hawkes are his friend because I love the ‘storyteller is the lovable rouge’ trope but like I have a few Hawkes he did not like. Yet here we are with him being besties. I really wish if we needed a continuing companion it was Dorian who has REASON to be in Tevinter. Varric can at in Kirkwall.

Inquisition

Actually a brutal honesty moment is me going: this game is rank 3 for me out of the three so far. I don’t HATE it. It’s a fun game. But god the entire open world they tried SUCKED. It’s so tedious I get bored after Haven is destroyed.

Blackwell has the better romance compared to Cullen and no you can’t tell me otherwise. It’s much more dramatic and impactful and I love him. Also people saying he killed kids ignore how the Templars murder children and how Cullen 100% was an accessory to it even if he didn’t do it himself. Also I always find it funny there’s uproar over Blackwall doing this when there is a graduation system where they MURDER INNOCENT PEOPLE but oh no that’s never discussed. Plus with how much other shit goes down- yeah Blackwall is irredeemable totally when it’s HUMAN NOBLE children who die.

I’ve said my piece about Cullen being a disappointment of a character.

I never actually liked Cassandra and even after romancing her she’s still bottom of them in my list. I’m just not able to make anyone hate me.

[olderthannetfic]

Gonna be real and this is just my subjective opinion, so I know some people will feel the complete opposite: 1st person present tense is some of the worst way of writing I've encountered, it's just so awkward and stilted, and just never comes across as intense or emotional as it tries to be.

Only stories where it kinda works, ironically, are short form horror or psychological, where the entire focus lies on the emotions and the mind then and there. But if you mix it with action or scene-focus, it just falls completely apart and becomes boring and/or tedious to read. I think present tense is generally a very dividing way of writing, you either love it, or you hate it. Because to me it just feels too much like narrating instead of telling a story. It also makes certain monologues in 1st person sound really weird, because it feels like the character is stopping mid-action to give their thoughts, in past tense both 1st and 3rd meanwhile it feels like those thoughts are purposefully added as an addition while telling the story at a later time. It also feels like it has an issue with how narration and retelling of a story. If something happens in the present, the way information is saved in your brain is different from how it is stored when you later retell it; I've noticed that a lot of present tense will be written in a way that's more like retelling something, but as if it's happening right now and being narrated, and it clashes. Another thing is, and that is more of a general issue, I've noticed that either authors who write 1st person present tense write more preachy, or it just comes across much more jarring, because, once again, it halts the action in order to preach at you. It's just weird.

--

[insufferableprotagonistpoll]

Round 2

Propaganda why Velma is insufferable:

"It’s that Velma from the VELMA TV SHOW.

I’m so sorry, I honestly don’t know what else to say right now.

If you know why she’s so insufferable, you know. 💀"

"Insufferable, preachy, annoying, does not even try to be likable

Seriously, who thought it was a good idea to greenlight this trash?"

"Do I really need to explain... My deepest condolences to the REAL Velma from Scooby Doo, she would never stand for any of this"

Propaganda why Bloom Peters is insufferable:

"Look at this image and tell me this looks like winx https://m.media-amazon.com/images/M/MV5BYjRjMjg2MGEtMmQ1Yi00Yjc0LTlkZTItNjQzYjAwNjQ3MGU0XkEyXkFqcGdeQWRvb2xpbmhk._V1_.jpg"

"Bloom (and entire show) is written like the director gave a middle aged conservative man $100 to write what he thought “woke” teens would like."

"God. GOOOOOODDDDD. Netflix's take on Bloom is one of the worst character assassinations I have ever had the misfortune to witness. She has a fuse the size of a hydrogen atom. She gets angry at people when they try to assist her, ranging from accusing a passerby of 'mansplaining' when he tried to help her find her class to YELLING at the person who saved her life from her own out-of-control fire powers. She wanders off to chase a lead on her ~mysterious backstory~ in the middle of a zombie invasion. She did not realize she was adopted when no one in her family has red hair. She treats her roommates (particularly Aisha) and classmates and parents like shit, and ignores their needs constantly (like insisting on having lunch and important discussions in a crowded room with Musa, an empath who can't turn her powers off, and Terra, who has crippling social anxiety). She begs an adult for help and then insults them. She suuuuucks. (Also her parents suck too, but this isn't about them. Fate!Vanessa you and I will fight at midnight about taking away Bloom's door I don't even blame her for accidentally setting you on fire.)"

"Her sins:

1. Main character of one of the worse live action adaptions I’ve ever seen

2. Not like other girls x1000- she likes ✨reading books✨ and ✨going to vintage stores✨ and gets in a fight with her mom about how she doesn’t go to parties and have friends like a ✨basic bitch✨

3. Gets so mad at her mom that she loses control of her powers and nearly kills her parents in a fire

4. A guy told her she was going the wrong way to get to class and she accused him of “mansplaining”

5. Shitty and boring fashion sense, little to no bright colors and not a single glittery top

6. Season one “Transformation” is just a dozen different camera angles of her awkwardly floating with cgi fire around her

7. I didn’t watch season two, but a friend who did told me she develops a savior complex and has an unnecessary amount of make out scenes at random times"

[stitching-in-time]

Voyager rewatch s3 ep13: Fair Trade

This is an episode that I actually don't think I'd ever seen from start to finish before this. I know I saw the beginning of it on a rerun at some point, but I got bored and didn't finish it. I can't say I blame myself, since it went pretty predictably, and I'm not a huge Neelix fan.

I can still appreciate Neelix when they give him good material, but I don't really feel that this was. Whenever Star Trek deals with anything concerning illicit drugs, it always ends up feeling like a preachy after school special. Of course narcotics are bad, the drug trade is bad, we already know. It's low hanging fruit for a show that's supposed to take on controversial topics, and I don't think I've ever seen them actually address it at any more than surface level- never anything about how hopeless conditions lead people to drug abuse, or the political forces that push them onto vulnerable populations. And this one is no different, it's just a long cautionary tale about the dangers of not telling the truth, all told through the lens of a very black and white sort of morality, that's predicated on a certain level of privilege on the part of both the Starfleet characters and the people who write them.

To have Neelix encounter his former criminal partner who tries to draw him into one last scheme may be a classic trope, but it feels a bit out of character. Neelix seems too squeaky clean at this point to have ever been involved in deliberately shady dealings. I suppose he did lie to Janeway and the crew to get them to help him rescue Kes in the pilot episode, but they were still basically strangers then, and he was always more of a 'lovably scrappy' type character than a hardened, morally grey criminal. By now, in season 3, he's so indoctrinated into Starfleet ways that I don't think it would even occur to him to do anything sneaky without asking the Captain and getting her permission first. Plus, if he'd been involved in smuggling schemes before, he'd know that 'one last job, what could go wrong' is always a precurser to the scheme going very wrong.

He could have and should have just told the truth from the beginning, and the crew probably would have done what they could to help. It's a valid idea to explore how he might have been feeling insecure and useless knowing they were leaving the part of space he knows, but I think it could have been a b-plot that didn't need so much screentime. Honestly it reminded me of an episode of Tangled: The Series, where Eugene encounters his old partner in crime and has to hide it from Rapunzel when he gets pulled into one last heist. Even characters from a Disney princess movie could figure out the importance of telling the truth and sticking to your newfound principals in half the time it took Neelix here.

Things I did enjoy in this one were the first introduction of adorable Vulcan engineering officer Ensign Vorik, and seeing Voyager's little supply room where they keep all their containers they use on missions. Between this and the last ep, where we saw the environmental control room for the first, and I think only, time, we're seeing more little nooks and crannies of the ship than we have in the past few seasons, and I really adore little things like that that fill out the world of the ship. I love knowing that they have to use certain containers for certain types of materials, and that the have to go look through the piles of them by hand like they're looking for the right lid in a messy tupperware cabinet, lol. (Part of me feels like that's a Voyager thing, too- like the Enterprise would have it all neatly organized, but the Voyager crew are all such a mess that they let their store room just get like that, and don't talk about it to the Captain in the hope she never notices.)

We get a nice scene with Tom leveling with Neelix about regretting his lack of honesty in his past, and another frustratingly oblique reference to Tom's totally-not-Nick-Locarno accident. I know they had to keep it legally distinct for copyright purposes, so they just avoided it all together by only talking about it in vague terms, but I do wish they'd have actually just settled on a different story and used it on the show. When I was a teenager, I read Jeri Taylor's novel with all the Voyager character's backstories, where she did actually explain what happened with Tom, and I think that should have been something that was explored on the show, at some point, since it was a huge deal for his character, and definitely informed how I thought of him when I watched the show after reading it. But alas, I can't think of a single episode where it was even mentioned, let alone given it's due, so we have to make do with crumbs like this.

Anyway, despite this episode being extremely formulaic, I did appreciate the very last scene, where Captain Janeway, despite being angry, tells Neelix he's part of a family now, and he has a responsibility to them all. She sends him to scrub exhaust conduits for a punishment, but Neelix couldn't be happier to hear from the Captain that he's an integral part of the Voyager family, and that she wouldn't even think of letting him go. It's a lovely moment, and makes me a little emotional to hear Janeway literally call the crew a family. I love my little Voyager space fam.

Tl;dr: A rather predictible storyline that feels like an after school special. Not one of my favorites, but has a few good moments, especially for anyone who likes Neelix a lot.

[comotsolebo]

While reading 'Pluto,' I had this realization that this was the first time that I had compassion/empathy for robots . Looking back at my childhood, I always felt a disconnect to movies when they tried making robots "humans" by just placing them in human like bodies or making them tell speeches about how they are more human than us. I felt that was disingenuous, preachy, and boring to describe humanity like that.

When reading 'Pluto,' I could see a robot that had no physical attributes of a human feel more human than anyone. It didn't need facial expressions to make you understand its story. I was actually surprised when I realized each robot their own form of humanity in order to live.

I recommend everyone to read/watch Naoki Urasawa's retelling of the Astroboy story.

[s1ithers]

stolen throne screed. trying to reserve judgment in case this is going somewhere, but good god why'd they make maric such a dweeb. it's killing me. i have to talk shit.

this is such a bizarre character introduction, i can't tell how we're meant to take it. he's the son of a rebel queen growing up on the run with this guerilla army, but he treats it like his mom's boring job. he knows fuckall. when people declare fealty to him he doesn't know what to say. this guy who's been a prince all his life doesn't have (1) appropriate stock response drilled into him. he barely remembers how to knight a guy. he can't ride a horse. ask him anything about the war he's like wuhhh idk, mom does all that. sucks we have to march so much :(

like i hate him? his (mother's) followers are described as ragged & starving for this cause. our man cannot be bothered. i hate him so much

sure, 'hapless idiot = Relatable(tm)' is....a school....of protagonist design. 'naive young hero grows into leadership role' is a time-honored arc. but what hits so weird is the lack of splashover from this to the rest of the world, fine & good to make your protag a spoiled little shit but where's the in-universe logic for why he's like this?

moira is set up as a great queen and so far it seems like we're meant to take this description at face value. so this great ruler, whose goal is specifically the restoration of her bloodline to the throne, just couldn't be bothered to train her heir to even the most basic level. so the queen's characterization starts to fall apart. which makes the dedication of her followers less convincing. so you get this chain reaction of characterization issues that hollows out the whole thing

or maybe the queen intentionally sheltered her son to the point of uselessness for (???) reasons, which you'd think would take serious effort considering he grew up literally in army camps shoulder to shoulder with hardened guerrillas who're suffering all these hardships & risking their lives & apparently cool with the grownass adult prince mooning around just like, plugged into his gameboy in the back seat. which would set up an interesting dynamic! if it felt like the book was doing it on purpose. if that turns out to be the case i'll eat this post lol

but it's like, 'feckless princeling' is a type, and 'beloved warrior queen' is a type, and 'scrappy rebel army,' and they're all just sort of plucked out of the genre bag without much thought for how they interact or what meaning they create when juxtaposed yknow. and i feel like so often when the writing in DA falls down for me, it's because of this, the narrative locks into treating a character as the type or genre figure they represent, rather than respond to what they actually do or how they're situated in diegetic context

gamlen might be the ur-example of this to me. he absolutely got shafted by their parents. it's 100% fair to ask your relatives who've been crashing in your shitty apartment for a year to help out with rent and food. but he's designated Surly Deadbeat Uncle so he's not allowed to have a point. anders is the healer, what does he do in his free time? eh, he heals. running a nonprofit clinic for 7 years has no bearing on his role as the Preachy SJW Friend. it's writ large in da:i

it breaks the illusion of a living world bc background characters aren't allowed to react authentically. they have to look at this dipshit and be like ~ yay our beloved prince :) ~ they're just narrative puppets. it cheapens the MCs for obvious reasons

it's interesting bc da:o is so consciously built around inverting genre tropes and how that carries forward or doesn't as the series goes on. what gets identified as a Trope for that treatment and what seems to go unexamined

i think TST is suffering from the franchise's awkward genre transition. it sets up a story about rebellion & occupation, i went in wanting/expecting... obviously not realism, but at least as heavy stakes as da:o mostly tried to orient itself around. but maric (& rowan) feel more like characters from d&d-type light fantasy where that kind of thing really is meant to be a backdrop for the player characters to romp around in

AND. also from the series' long-running weirdness about what it is exactly the nobility are and do. but i think i've hit my daily word limit for bitching about DA lol

[kimyoonmiauthor]

The Lie: You can only make a story around character or events nothing else~~

USian Lit professors ruining writers again and World Lit with it. This isn’t one of those posts where I say, “If you start with character or events you’re wrong.” It’s about my core philosophy OPTIONS~~~ Options. The ones that everyone railed against after the 20th century and people turn their noses up at because, ya know, questioning status quo as PoCs, Women, queer people, disabled people–i.e. the majority of the writers and readers when you put the market together, yet somehow the publishing industry doesn’t want to cater to us... were told flat out if we do it, we’re being snobby, Literary, or Ohhh... insurrectionists. (Or whatever, mostly called “inferior”) And if you don’t believe me, go read Robert Scholes’ writing book where he thinks that only white straight men can write... (OK, maybe I’ve read too many of these bozos.)

My exact problem is being told we’re wrong for doing it another way. And that this way is too snobby, when it’s probably one of the oldest methods in the history of literature. So strap in, let’s get into it.

I get it, some people are going to act like victims at this point and say are you saying that it’s wrong? Or even, what do you mean this method was invented by a bunch of prejudiced white men who often tried to take credit from less privileged people? I cover that in the other series of posts so you a see how we got here (and I warn you I found it super depressing. Especially slapped with blatant racism, sexism, anti-queerness, etc.)

What I think is you can accept the origin story of where “It’s either events or character” comes from (Great Man Theory, BTW, which is imperialistic), delve and QUESTION it heavily, and then challenge the origin more deeply by thinking about it critically and how you would like to overcome that and make their story.

Questioning what’s handed to you critically is the whole point of the Worldbuilding and Worldwide Story Structures post. Doesn’t say it is wrong. It just gives you more options to think about and engage in.

Morals

Honestly, when it has the answers and is reinforcing the status quo, rather than questioning it, it is often boring.

Pros: It engages directly one of the two tenants (when done well), Makes people think. The secondary is then makes them feel.

Cons: When done badly, it can feel preachy, rather than introspective. And people often hate their morals being questioned so may refuse to engage. It’s also prone to getting banned.

Authors who stated they use this: Ursula Le Guin (Who gets hated by Structuralists)

Toni Morrison (Who said so on Charlie Rose--why would you think it’s conflict?)

Star Trek... most of it.

Some of the early writers of Star Wars.

A lot of Sci-fi writers including Octavia Butler.

A Tree with Deep Roots (K-drama) also engages in this.

As a secondary, Outlander often asks questions about Morality (Diana Gabaldon)

Making a story around this would look like finding a central moral question and then breaking that moral question into parts and then finding characters and events to address those parts.

You start from the widest point down and deliberately make it so.

Ways to Live

More common with Indigenous Peoples of N&C&S Americas, not all tribes/nations of course. And particularly with Plains tribes such as Zuni. Also common to Aboriginal people. A tad bit to some Polynesians, and parts of Africa (scattered)

Pros: When done well it makes you ponder on it for days, because often there is a central value, which is not a moral, and you’re turning it over in your head over and over again.

Cons: You have to craft the story very, very carefully, and it may take some time before you get it to land just right. This may not go over well for people who improvise their writing. Because when the story is well put together it suddenly has this clicking feel to it which is difficult to achieve.

Also kinda better for shorter stories (or I’ve never seen it done in novels yet--if you have one, drop it in the comments please~~) and made up folktales...

Themes

Thematic plotting is where you take a central theme and then kind of snowflake it out from that, similar to morality plotting. Often thematic plotting and morality plotting has overlap, meaning they often are done together.

But a theme can be anything like fairies, divorce, marriage, disability, etc. And then you’d break it down for each of the parts and figure out how to represent that through character and events.

So, let’s say your central theme is disability. You might break off Neurodiversity and put that to the side and ask if it is a disability. Then you might want to find someone to represent that and the views about it.

You might also then take someone who is a wheelchair user and then decide you need a character for that.

But you also may want someone who is in a walker.

Then you might decide that you need someone who is disabled, but doesn’t “look” disabled.

Then you might think about what does disability mean for each of them and how are you going to address disability rights in your story. So say the Neurodiverse person you’ve made has Sensory Processing Disorder. You might ask, “Is this really a disability?” And about ableism and disablism. From that, you might formulate an event to demonstrate this.

You can also do it from events. So for example, you think that a disability rights rally about X issue is needed to show the different views. But overall, it always loops back to the theme.

Pros: Engages the reader to think, primarily. Feel is kind of second on the list, if the theme is teased out well and focused. Generally the ones that do well are philosophical and delve deeper on an idea. Say motherhood. What does it mean to be a parent. Something with an endless well to talk about that interests the author. I love theme babies and when done well it can do things like make you cry over a damned potato. Or even rocks on a cliff. Damn you both. I’m tearing up thinking about it. WHY!? Why am I crying about rocks with googly eyes with text on the screen?

Cons: Themes that don’t grow beyond the base idea often feel stagnant. It’s better to let your themes evolve over the course of the story. If you choose a theme you don’t have a lot of ideas on it can feel too sparse. And if you over pack it without any kind of organization, it can feel chaotic, rather than organized.

Generally people who use milestones--or set out event points in the road do better with this one. Pure improvisers tend to dislike this, though it can work if you’re sure you can hit the points in an organized fashion.

Authors: 

Divorce Testimony by Na Hyeseok (Theme is divorce and marriage, and a memoir)

Hong Sisters (especially Greatest Love. Crying over a potato...)

Everything Everywhere All at Once (Primarily theme first, then tone).

Tone

I have to say Japan does it best... but I’ve also seen tonal theming from Indigenous peoples, Magic Realism, as a secondary on other East Asian drama regions, in Horror, as a secondary in some African Lit and West Asian Lit. It is really difficult to nail if you start with character+event. And honestly USians, in particular, have a really hard time nailing tone, in general.

Pros: Emotions come first and hits you directly in the feels first, which might make you reel in your head for quite a while. It’s much, much harder to guess plot points from the outside looking in. The bubble effect I refer to often in Japanese dramas which makes me envious is much easier to achieve. Because tone takes a while to develop over the course of the story, guessing ahead becomes near to impossible. You don’t know what the final effect will be until it hits you square between the eyes. And then the emotions are overloaded, when done well.

Cons: Tone takes a while to develop. It often dies a quiet death because of the whole “I NEED EVERYTHING ON PAGE ONE” mentality from US pressuring other regions to do the same. It does not work well with impatient people. Also, it takes a high amount of skill to do well, and usually command of tone on all levels is a last, not first skill for writers of all regions. Hitting people in the feels the same way across the board is HARD. Really hard, which is often why it’s paired with thematic and moral plotting.

Authors: 

Natsume Soseki Botchan is a master class in this.

(Central Story driver)

Sometimes, some regions just go by the central story driver which then dictates the rest of the events and character. Honestly, I think conflict is probably the worst for this because people don’t generally love it. Conflict is not on the list of things that makes things go viral. People LOVE cooperation, for example. But often people will go by a central tenant of the story driver and choose from there. Absurdists might think about ways to subvert the conflict to make a joke.

Other methods

For example, Diana Gabaldon takes pieces from her research, makes a scene from it, and then writes characters around it, and then slowly stitches it together. She started out originally with character, however, the bulk of her writing, according to her is done through research then write method. The downside of this is huge word count since integration is not the first concern.

Some people start with interesting subjects they’ve found such as Guy Gaviriel Kay. He starts with research, then works on integration. Similarly, Ordinary People by Judith Guest was started from a newspaper clipping.

Some authors start with a sharp image, rather than event or character.

Some authors start with setting. Since there are so many parts to “What makes a story” theoretically you can start with any of them. The only thing I would think you really have to think over is how will it hang together.

The point is, while starting with character or event is not wrong, finding other methods to plot might make your story stronger depending on how you command the tools. And let’s not forget that writing is a craft, so why not utilize as much of the toolbox as possible?

[danganronpa2]

tome in the reigen spinoff is so important to me, like the way she's not being bullied or intentionally ostracized or anything at school but she still finds herself always being ignored and talked over by the other girls about topics she doesn't care about, how she can't really keep herself from bringing up her occult/alien interests even when she promises herself she's gonna stop, the way she doesn't dislike or resent them necessarily but she still sees them as fundamentally "different" than herself. extremely real experience for weird girls in high school. and then at the end when she intentionally asks them and finds out about all their unique secret hobbies and interests because it turns out they're all real people too!! it's so good, such a great takedown of the "not like other girls" thing while still acknowledging how hard it is not to fit in.

i think one of the greatest things about mp100 in general is how the supernatural action complements the personal drama - if you tried to do the same type of character arc in a normal high school drama manga, it would probably be super overwrought with jealousy and anger and bullying. but since mp100 uses its action segments to provide the excitement and suspense, it can navigate the real-life issues in a more matter-of-fact way without getting too overdramatic or preachy about it, and you can see tome come to a realization like this in a way that feels simple and real but not boring at all

[docgold13]

One-dimensional sure but I don't know about boring. Like it fascinates me that Captain Planet tried to tackle social issues (some if which never aged well like the population control episodes...yes seriously) with a the grace of a sledgehammer.

I was not a cynical child... but even I found Captain Planet to be pandering. I care about all of the issues that cartoon tried to tackle, but it's preachiness almost made me not want to care.

The Smoggies and Octonauts handled these matters so much more deftly (IMO).

[joandfriedrich]

I have second hand embarrassment for you.

"Meg has no personality"- Did we read the same book? Meg has personality, just because it isn't loud in your face like Jo, that doesn't mean she isn't interesting. Yes, she wants to be a housewife, but that shouldn't diminish her character. She is a dutiful, she is hardworking, she is passionate, but she also can be envious, selfish, and cold. Her arc was to learn to appreciate what she had and how to allow herself to ask for help from others.

"Jo gave up everything for some random old man". - Excuse me? Jo did not give up everything for some random man, she had choose to live a life where she devoted to making sure those less fortunate had a chance to learn, married a man whom she adored, and I might s well spoil it for you since you don't seem willing to reading the sequels, Jo does get to write and publish books. She gave up nothing for some nobody. She made of her life as she wished, with the man who, was introduced halfway through the story, that was perfect for her.

"Beth's death was so unrealistic and boring"- This made me upset, because it was based on the very tragic death of Louisa May Alcott's sister, Lizzie, who died the same way. I am sorry that she didn't go out in a blaze of glory, sometimes people died slowly and peacefully. She is in the story because her story deserves to be told, that sometimes the quiet people who may not do anything fantastical still can be loved and and missed when gone. They count as well!

"Marmee was preachy/How poor are the girls?"- She gives her daughters advice, how is that preachy? Also, if you had actually paid attention, the girls were invited to parties, didn't host them, and when they had, the Laurence's had a hand in funding them, you know, the ones who had the money.

"How could Jo forgive Amy for being a child?"- Of course, you are one of those people, the anti-Amy people. Amy was a little girl when she burned the book, and yes, it was crappy, but Jo realized that Amy had truly been sorry, and that she shouldn't let her temper control her life, and it was because of her temper that Amy nearly died, since she didn't make sure that Amy heard Laurie's warning. And yes, Amy did make that statement, but you completely misunderstand it. Because of her Aunt March, who had also tried to pressure her older sisters into marrying for money, Amy felt it was her duty to do so, which was why she went after Fred Vaughn, but turned him down in the end because she realized that she was betraying her own self to marry someone she didn't love. Her wanting to "please society" doesn't mean her conforming to it. She was a a bit of a selfish kid, and after the ordeal of Beth's near death with scarlet fever, Amy realized that she was being selfish and wanted to be helpful to others, be as good as Beth was. So her wanting to "please society" was more about being useful and more charitable to others.

It shouldn't surprise me that you are a pro-Jo and Laurie shipper, despite the many, many, many times Jo has explained how she didn't feel for Laurie the same way he felt for her. And it honestly makes so much sense, since they knew each other since childhood and they complimented each other so much better than Jo, who, once again., DID NOT LOVE LAURIE ROMANTICALLY!

And one more, with feeling, FRIEDRICH NEVER FORCED JO TO GIVE UP HER WRITING! Laurie was the one who hated her "scribbles" as he called them, while Friedrich had supported and advised her in her writing, which Jo happily accepted.

"It's a story about women needing men and conforming the society". This is truly the worst take of this book I have ever read. It is not about women "needing" men or them "conforming" to society, it's about four different sisters who went from childhood into adulthood their own way, and doing what made them happy in the end. All the girls could have married rich men, but each married men whom they loved, and each lived their lives as they wished. Meg wanted to be a wife and mother, Jo helping to educate children and became a writer in the sequel, Amy became a painter who would help others to paint, and Beth, though died young, had worked to help her family and others, and had she lived, could have do much good in charity.

You clearly do not deserve such a classic such as "Little Women", and I am honestly a little afraid of you opinions of other great classics.

I feel like i need to say more about Little Women so here goes.....

EXTREMELY BORING AND DISAPPOINTING BOOK. God knows how I finished this in SIX FUCKING MONTHS. I skipped so much stuff because it added literally nothing to the story. But I kept going because 'there must bs SOMETHING that makes this book so popular, right??' well NO.

Meg has no personality except being 'a good housewife'. I sort of liked Jo but then she goes and gives up writing for a random old man who likes her(?????) . Beth's death was boring and soooo unrealistic and I don't know why she was in the book itself. Amy was simply infuriating. 'I'll be an elegant woman and marry a rich man and please the society', what kind of message is that???? (And this is supposed to be an empowering book???)

And their Marmee, who is always preaching everyone left and right and tries to teach her girls a lesson...all of it is just so dull😭. They are extremely poor but they give their Christmas food to someone even poorer than them. There is no portrayal of exactly how much money they have because they always get on well and hold parties and go to picnics??? And yet they are poor?

The four girls don't seem to be like sisters at all. Amy (or was it beth, i don't remember?) BURNS Jo's book, she has a minor outrage, then Amy starts drowning so Jo FORGIVES HER FOR BURNING HER GODDAMN BOOK?? I mean yes ofc you don't want your sister to die but those two things are totally unrelated, how can you forgive her for destroying your hardwork just because she was about to die?

And NOW comes the most senseless part of the whole book- Amy and Laurie ending up together. Biggest WTF? moment in the book because i had been ROOTING FOR JO AND LAURIE the moment they became friends😭. They had so much chemistry and were definitely good for each other. I didn't really understand why she rejected him and later regretted it.

But how did he start loving AMY of all people??? She was mourning her sister's death and comes and hugs him and suddenly his feelings have changed? One moment he was sulking about being rejected by Jo, now he's falling for Amy and marrying her?

Then comes the even bigger plot twist, Jo marries the professor, who is 15 years older than her and who made her give up writing stories. I don't even have words for this.

All in all, it was a very difficult read. It was just a bunch of different stories packed together in 700 pages, of which I skipped about 100. It all just came down to the women always needing men and fitting with the stereotypes of the society and being incapable of doing anything on their own. Probably the worst book I ever read.

Also, this was my first 'classic' and I've been hugely disappointed. So I need GOOD classic recs, please help.

[nerdygaymormon]

My Eulogy

Hi. My name is David. You probably already know that. This is my story. And like all stories, it’s subjective; meaning I chose what to include based on my own feelings and opinions. I’ve had a lot of nicknames: D Diddy, Master D, Double D, D Dog, and Chuck (short for Chuckles). Isn’t it weird that Dave was never my nickname? I guess I should start at the beginning. I was born in Alberta, Canada in November 1970. My parents wed in February of that year…you can do the math. My dad once told me that he and my mom each brought a lot to the marriage, but that’s what it was, two people with their own histories. He said I am the first result of their marriage, the thing which changed them from two people into one unit, a family. I always liked that thought. My earliest memory is when my mom, with tears in her eyes, told me and my sister that Jesus is important to her, wanted us to learn about Him. I also remember her speaking on the phone and saying that our reaction was basically “Yep, we know, we learn about Him at church.” I went to kindergarten in California. I had a teacher named Ms. Berry, but I called her Ms. Strawberry. One day a bunch of dads came and taught us skills. I was so excited my dad was there and showed us how to hammer nails. I still feel comfort and love when I remember laying in the top bunk at night as my dad vacuumed the bedroom, and how he’d look over at me and smile. At the age of 8, I was baptized by my dad in Alabama. My family moved a lot. I don’t really know why. Thinking back on Halloweens, the one candy I always dreaded getting was those peanut butter-flavored sticky candies that come wrapped in orange or black wax paper. Who even likes those? If someone out there does, you gotta be the KING of Halloween candy trading. “Hey, you like these? Here, I’ll trade you them for that mini Snickers and a Blow Pop.” “Okay, fine, I’ll take just the two Hershey kisses. At least I got SOMETHING for them.” I began Junior High in Texas. It was horrible. I knew I liked boys in a way other boys didn’t. I tried to hide that from everyone, even from me. Eighth grade was the worst. I wanted to die. Some of the guys in my gym class caught me sneaking glances at a dude in the shower. That got around the school and I was shamed and harassed. One person was especially hard on me, not just about that, but about everything. I faced him in a wrestling match and was determined to get him back. I dominated, all I needed was for him to bend his elbow and he’d be pinned. I pressed down hard and…Snap! That crack of his bone was loud. He immediately went limp in my arms. I felt sick to my stomach. I really hurt him. I also felt joyful vengeance. I’d been good at wrestling, but I stopped. I didn’t like the monster I saw I could become. So school sucked. And scouting, I hated it, and we did that every Wednesday at church. Like the school day wasn’t already bad enough and then scouts on top of it. Oh, there was one really cool thing that happened related to scouts. In church we had a lesson that the quorum president is the leader, the adults were there to guide but the power rested with us. The quorum president said, “In that case, we’re done with scouting.” He asked if the rest of us sustained. We voted to end scouting! Unfortunately my dad and a few others didn’t take that well and I was forced to go to a different scout program in the stake. One of the bright spots of my Junior High & High School years were piano lessons. I excelled with a teacher who was quick to praise, which helped boost my very bruised self-image. Developing your gifts and talents isn’t selfish, it’s actually a great gift to other people. Another bright spot were my friends. If you’re hearing this and you are a teenager, reach out to the youth around you. No matter how nice the leaders are, they can’t make up for feeling left out by other teens. Trust me. At some point I realized a lot of our culture honors those who stand up against the norms, admires those who live life on their own terms. I made a list of 5 actions, actually non-actions, I would take to make me different. 1) Not go to Prom 2) Not go to Homecoming   3) Not get a driver’s license   4) Not go to graduation   5) No open house when I leave for a mission. I didn’t tell anyone about this list and my poor dad, he would get excited for these things, like Prom, and get me a tuxedo only to be bewildered I wasn’t going. I kept 4 of those 5 stupid, pointless goals. My parents did make me get a driver’s license so they could stop carrying me to 6am seminary class. I didn’t realize until too late, the point of being different is to replace frivolous things with something deeper, better, more meaningful. I loved art class even though my grades were so-so. One day my art teacher asked me to explain the print I made, what was my thinking behind the design. After listening, she said the skills of how to use the different tools and materials can be learned and that my classmates are all better at using them. But I have something they don’t have, something that can’t be taught. Art comes from the head and heart, it requires creativity and a different way of viewing things, of having something to say, a story to share. What I heard was my classmates were all better, I was the worst. Later I understood what she meant. She’d actually given me the greatest compliment of my life. I have something worth sharing, I just need to learn how. After years of crying for God to fix me, to make me normal, I eventually accepted that a homo is what I am. I didn’t choose it, in fact had fought it. I guarded this knowledge, it was dangerous. But owning this is part of me gave me power even as it complicated church and my life. Church is where my friends were and it was okay except when terrible things were taught about people like me. Why do we let harmful words go unchallenged? Hearing bigoted, intolerant words really feels isolating. I know it’s hard to stand out and be different, to rock the boat. But doing nothing, being silent—to the person feeling attacked, it’s not viewed as neutral. Choosing not to speak up is taking sides. Speak the truth, even if your voice shakes. Immediately after high school, I got arrested, actually spent time in jail. Shocking, right? I shoplifted a shirt. That’s sort of a harsh punishment, don’t you think? Fortunately a plea deal was made and I avoided a criminal record. I’ve paid this forward, twice I’ve agreed for charges against a young adult to be dropped so they could have a second chance at a clean record. When my bishop called me in to talk about preparing for a mission, I went home and prayed hard. I asked if God loves me, loves me for who I am, all that I am. Warmth radiated across my body. I knew with certainty that I’m loved and I am not broken. Serving a mission in Korea is one of the great adventures of my life. I learned so much about myself. I rose to the challenge. I worked hard and made some life-long friends. Weekly service at orphanages really buoyed me, I loved playing with those kids. While I was in Korea, at a branch conference, the members voted to not sustain their branch presidency. In other words, they voted out their branch leaders! I didn’t even know that was possible. I mean, yes, we get to vote, but it’s always more of a formality. I hadn’t realized we have power. The name of our church indicates this is the case. It’s the church of Jesus Christ AND it’s the church of the latter-day Saints. In brief, here is the top highlight of my mission. I met a man at a bus stop. I was going to give him a Book of Mormon, but a voice in my ear very clearly whispered not to. Twice that happened. The third time I was reaching to get a book out of my bag to give to him despite that voice. My arm froze and the voice said if I gave him the book, the consequences would be on my head. Message received loud and clear, no book given away that night. He eventually got baptized, and I was still in Korea a year later when he got married. Receiving the phone call from him that he was being sealed to a wife in the temple was the happiest day of my mission. Hearing that voice in my ear would happen again and again over the years. Not very often, but always significant. I’ll include a few more examples. Next I was off to college, which I loved! In January 1993 I arrived in Idaho to attend Ricks College (now it’s called BYU-Idaho). I’ve never been so cold my entire life. If I walked outside with wet hair, it’d freeze! My first roommate was soooo handsome. The girls called him “Ken” because he reminded them of Barbie’s boyfriend. We became great friends. I had a crush on him. At the end of the semester he told me he’s bi and our relationship changed. I was willing to leave behind church and family to be with him. He decided his life would be easier if he pursued a relationship with a woman and so left me behind in Idaho. After “Ken,” my next roommate was Futoshi from Japan. He became my best friend. Many years later I attended his wedding in Japan. In fact, our tradition is to send each other a package of Halloween treats (and no, I’ve never sent him those terrible black-and-orange wrapped candies). I was walking down the sidewalk at Ricks College and a voice in my ear whispered I should call Memo from Mexico to be my 1st counselor in the elders quorum presidency. “Yes,” I thought to myself, “he’s an excellent choice.” Wait. What?!! MY counselor? That night I got a phone call, I was the new Elders Quorum president. Half the ward was in my quorum (the other half were women). I visited with each person in the quorum every month. I liked them. I knew them all. Ah, Rexburg, home of BYU-Idaho. Does anyone know if they ever renamed Beaver Dick Park? So many unfortunate (or fortunate, if you know what I mean) double entendres. After Ricks, on I went to BYU in Utah. Futoshi came, too. I wanted to date and kiss and all the things my friends did, except with men, and that was explicitly banned by the Honor Code, even things like holding someone’s hand was out of bounds. I feared the Honor Code Office, they sometimes ran undercover stings trying to catch gay students. While in Provo, I had a faith crisis. Being in the heart of Mormondom, I had access to information that showed a different sort of story than I’d been taught in Sunday School, like the way Joseph Smith translated the gold plates. What to do with this messy history? How do I fit into the Plan of Salvation? Retaining faith, in many ways, is a choice to accept the complexity, to give up black & white for nuance. As for me, I hold on to the times I’ve seen God’s love, mercy, and justness come through the lives of flawed individuals who learn to measure up and do profound things. While a student at BYU, I got a job at the Missionary Training Center (MTC) teaching Korean to missionaries. I loved it. That place is a spiritual powerhouse and I was able to plug in every day. And I was there when my brother came to the MTC as a new missionary. I was able to eat lunch with him every week. And what’s funny is the missionaries I was teaching knew he was my brother and every morning would give me a report on what they’d seen him doing. So at Friday lunch I was always able to say things like: “Elder, I hear you were throwing snowballs.” He’d always respond “How can you possibly know that?” “The Lord sees all, Elder.”  Working at the MTC meant, like the two years of my mission, I was back to wearing a white shirt nearly every day. When I stopped working there, I threw away all my white shirts and never looked back. Wearing colorful shirts in this church is unusual for men. It was a way to mark myself as different; a way to show my experience and journey is not the same as those around me. When someone at the podium looks out and sees a purple shirt, I want them to think, “Oh, there’s David.” Yes, see me, notice me! I matter, I belong. Please see I’m doing my best and even if I am different, I am here. I have 6 brothers and sisters. They married and had babies. Those nieces and nephews are the greatest blessings in my life. I thought I’d be a good dad, but I am gay and marriage equality didn’t come until too late. So I was the best uncle, involved in their lives, making sure they know they’re loved. One thing I like about kids is they ask really personal and fundamental questions. “What’s your favorite color?” Mine is yellow. Isn’t it a lovely color, so warm and inviting. All the different shades from cream and pastel to golden or bright sunshine, yellow is beautiful. Learning to play the piano, speak a language, ride a skateboard, drive a stick-shift car, ride a bike, hit a ball or most any other skill will require mistakes, thousands of them, maybe even hundreds of thousands. It can be embarrassing. Give yourself credit for trying. Attempting something that is challenging is what you should take pride in, not ashamed that I didn’t do it perfectly the first time, or every time. I don’t know why I’ve stayed in church all these years. That’s not true. But it is complicated and this doesn’t seem to be the time to get into it, I’m trying to tell my story. The anti-gay restrictions are strict and do a number on a person’s mental health. I wish my church and my orientation were more compatible. I don’t think God finds them incompatible. In fact, He loves me in a way my church is only just learning to do. I’ve spent more of my adult years in Primary (what we call junior Sunday School) than anywhere else. They even got me to serve as an assistant scoutmaster over the 11-year-old patrol. I couldn’t believe of all the things, it had to be scouts. I was determined that it was going to be fun for those scouts even as we were being productive, not how I experienced it. Those scouts were a joy to be with. One of them often said things like, “Knives? They NEVER let us play with knives in cub scouts.” “Hey, if I see you playing with it, game over. These are tools, not toys.” At the end of the day, I’m my longest commitment, it’s only proper that I make myself a priority. I went back to school and earned a Master’s degree from the University of Florida (Go Gators!). That was hard work.   That degree helped me land a job at a university. I love working in an environment that is open and accepting. I also really appreciate knowing my efforts are going towards the university’s mission of gathering, applying and disseminating knowledge. And it’s fun to work somewhere with a fight song and a mascot, I recommend it. When my grandma died, I played a piano piece at the funeral. Afterwards a lady came up and thanked me for all the years I spent practicing, sitting there alone at a piano when I could’ve been doing something more fun. What an unusual compliment, she put thought into it, and I appreciated the recognition that playing on that day didn’t just happen. That’s how life is, you’re preparing now for things you don’t even know are on your horizon. Try to be the best you can be. My favorite hero of fiction is TRUTH. I just think a great novel contains life’s important lessons and meaning wrapped in entertaining adventures and mysteries. Harry Potter & Huckleberry Finn not only transport us to another place, but leave us with deeper understandings. I love Harry Potter. Those books and movies teach so many important life lessons, some in a straightforward way and others you have to think about. Here’s a for instance, we learn that the thing Neville fears most is Professor Snape. This kid went to class for years with that professor. No wonder the Sorting Hat put him in Gryffindor; he was one of the bravest characters. Aren’t we all brave in this way, at least sometimes? I was asked to be a counselor in the stake young men presidency. I turned them down. It took two hours of convincing before I agreed to give it a try. I said they had the wrong guy and in six months when they recognized it, they could release me, no hard feelings. I couldn’t imagine that I’d have anything to offer. Turns out it was the right calling for me. I feel like I blossomed. I was no longer just existing, merely surviving in this church. At one point, a voice whispered in my ear that I was going to be stake young men president and I am an unusual choice and would only serve a short time.  I knew by “unusual” that meant because I’m gay. I started thinking of how I’d do things differently if I were in charge. Six months later I became president and I had a plan and hit the ground running. One way I was a different kind of Stake Young Men President is I applied my experience from when I was an Elders Quorum President all those years ago, of how I used to talk with everyone each month. As stake young men president, I visited every ward at least monthly, usually twice a month. This meant every month I had contact with nearly every young man in the stake, and many of the young women, too. It was a pleasure to work with the ward young men presidents, bishops put top-shelf people in those positions. I really liked getting to know the youth. I tried to be protective of teens who struggle. I want them to know they are seen, they are loved, and there is hope. Turns out a short time was exactly one year. I was very sad to be released, my church life had found meaning. When my stake president told me “with every calling comes a release,” I blurted out, “But I just bought a Chewbacca shirt for the Star Wars dance!” “Well, wear it on casual Friday,” was his response. I was asked to be the secretary to the stake president. It’s a lot of work, definitely not a favorite calling; I’d rather be back in Primary. He said many people could make appointments, but he wanted me to be stake executive secretary so my viewpoint is present in all the top councils of the stake. I attend stake presidency meeting and some of those meetings go on and on. “Dear Lord, as we begin this meeting, please help us not to be bored. And for them to keep their stories to a minimum so we can get out of here at a decent hour.” I’ve thought about praying for those things, although never was brave enough to actually do it. One night it was late, and the stake president asked who can say a short prayer. My hand shot up so fast! Early one chilly Florida morning, I was grumbling about how cold the steering wheel was as I’m in the McDonald’s drive-thru lane. I saw a man walk out the side door, past my car, to the homeless man sitting directly ahead of me. The homeless guy had no blanket or hat, just a sweatshirt for warmth. His reaction at receiving a cup of hot coffee and a warm sandwich really touched me. I was ashamed. Why wasn’t I more like that guy? I talk a good game, but true religion requires action. The world needs more Christ-like love like that. Sometimes I wonder if the things I hear at church align with the God I know. Does it fit with the two great commandments to love God and to love one another? I try to focus on the love, that is God’s primary attribute and the one I try to emulate. If your heart ever tells you that something doesn’t feel right, don’t ignore it. Over the years, if I’d read a story or seen a video about someone who is gay & LDS (or even formerly LDS), I sometimes tried contacting them. I never got a response. I have a blog where I write about being gay & Mormon. I wrote about an experience I had when I got to meet a church leader, Elder Joaquin Costa of the Seventy. The whispering voice prompted me to tell him I’m gay and he showed me a great deal of love. That blog post went viral. If you want to see it, do a search for “Nerdy Gay Mormon”. Because of my viral blog post, I was contacted by many people, hundreds of them. And I responded. It’s been incredibly rewarding. For the first time I had actual friends who are LGBTQ+ and LDS. I think if the teenage me who contemplated suicide could see how my life developed, he’d be surprised at how much better the future turned out. A job I like, the favorite uncle of 14, I am well liked across my stake and make a positive contribution. I’ve lived through a difficult but special time to be gay in the Church as it’s been transforming. Wanna hear something funny, one time at church my little nephew said, “I’m hungry. How much longer to the snackrament?” Life doesn’t wait until we’re perfectly prepared and feel totally up for what’s ahead of us. In fact, life is messy. It’s not been an easy path, but it’s been MY path. Being gay in a time of unacceptance helped me gain empathy for others. I’ve tried to be a good and kind person. Living within the restrictions placed on me by my church; it’s been difficult. I’ve tried to make a mark on the world. My one great regret in life is not having children. Even so, Primary teachers and scout leaders are important to children. I may not be the main gardener in anyone else’s life, but I nurture and water others. There’d be some pretty meager gardens without people like me. If you’re hearing this and are queer, I have a message for you. Being gay or trans or whatever is not a sin, it is not the result of a lack of faith, it is not a punishment. God created you and me as glorious, eternal beings. I am a son of God. I am gay. I am known and loved by Him. He is rooting for me. If the choice comes down to suicide or your church, choose to live. Protect your mental health by taking a break from religion. God created you. You determine if this will be a blessing or a curse in your life. Enjoy it. And to everyone, be kinder and gentler. Leave the enforcing of church boundaries, of judging, up to the bishop. Don’t tell a kid that he shouldn’t be wearing that or commenting that “someone” smells of cigarettes. If this is God’s church, then there should be room for all His children, all should feel welcome. Mormons have a way of obsessing over details that don’t matter. I wish we spent more time obsessing on how to love. That’s it! It feels like this story needs an ending, a concluding sentence, something snappy. I hope I have time to think of a good one.

[princesssarisa]

Quick reminder, because some Pride and Prejudice fans seem to think otherwise and criticize Austen for it:

Mr. Bennet doesn't call Mary "silly" because she's less social than her sisters or because she's a bookworm. If he did, that would be very hypocritical of him! He calls her "silly" because she's she's a pretentious, preachy bore who always tries to show off her intellect and accomplishments, which she thinks are greater than they are.

That doesn't mean we can't sympathize with her or relate to her. She behaves the way she does to try to compensate for her lack of beauty, and to gain the attention she rarely gets either from society or from her family. And of course Mr. Bennet is wrong to just write off Mary, Kitty, and Lydia as "silly" instead of giving them real parental guidance – this is the lesson he learns after Lydia runs off with Wickham. But Mary is a comic character, not just a relatable and unfairly judged nerd.

[thefcw]

She let him pull her between his legs and looked at him with a tilted head. Although he was a priest she rarely saw him as one, she saw him as a good friend and someone she truly cared for considering they’d know each other for a long time and Laura could always trust him. He was someone she could talk to when it was too difficult to confide in her own parents and oddly enough he alone could make any church day a little interesting, he wasn’t just a boring preachy preacher.

Her body slightly swinging like a mischievous child Laura pretended to think, “Hmm, let’s see. After I cleaned in the morning I decided to commit arson, after doing laundry I committed tax fraud… oh and before you got home I drew a summoning circle with the blood of an innocent to summon the devil.” She tried to look serious but instead she let out a soft laugh and blushed. “Of course I behaved. If I didn’t I’d probably be hiding under the bed.” She didn’t handle guilt well which was a good insensitive to behave.

The night before he had been speaking to his naive; a common occurrence that had been repeated as of late when he was far and away from her. The time he had taken to his priesthood to be celibate in his role had only repressed such urges that he had begun to think sinful things of his own niece. It had become a problem of late but the last time she had visited there had been an instance neither could have foreseen to begin such an affair. It had only been a kiss but he still tasted her now. He wanted more. He had made hints of it.

And now, he was asked to take her as his charge while her parents were away on business. It was almost as if the devil was testing him and he had her arrival before him. In his home she had visited before; doing god knows what and that still sent him on edge. It was late when he arrived as he drove away from the city, traffic making him late but once he had arrived he was greeted by her. He smiled, a rambling playful tone that already eased him. All that talk on the phone teasing him. Rupert saw her for the first night in some weeks and smiled, playing with the fingers that played with him as she pulled him forward. He took the offered drink in the other.

He ignored the question of hunger, sitting on the couch and pulling her to him to step between his legs and sitting back to look at her. “I might let you one day. You always had me wrapped around your wee fingers" Rupert confessed, taking a sip of his scotch. A soothing burn as it went down with a lick of his lips. He reached up and loosened his white collar on his neck but did not remove it.

“Have you been behaving, Laura?”