#toothless is a silly dog here

[neytui]

Cuz I haven't posted anything, some messy sketches I did a while ago on the Peter Pan au

Kinda screen redraw?

[harmonyrae]

Halloween Costumes

COUPLE COSTUMES! And I am begging, BEGGING, if there are any artists who feel inspired and want to draw the boys in these costumes... I would cry. Literally cry. Here's what's been floating around in my head for what y'all would wear on Halloween night.

Xavier:

“What about this one?” Xavier stops in front of a Velma costume and points to it.

“Would you be a Shaggy or a Scooby?” You laugh as you catch up to him. The costume store is extra busy and you nearly lost sight of him.

“Hmm… I don’t know… I guess either could work.” You grab his hand so you won’t get separated again. You look at the Scooby costume and giggle at the thought of Xavier in face paint and dog ears. There’s also a Scooby onesie hanging up nearby and it hits you.

“I have a better idea.” You pull Xavier’s arm and drag him to the pajama section.

When Halloween night finally rolls around, it certainly doesn’t play out like you expected.

“Are you sure you don’t want to go to the party?” Xavier asks for the 10th time. His foot is propped up on the coffee table, his arms crossed.

Ever since he got injured just 2 days before Halloween he’s been urging you to go without him. He’s an amazing hunter, but got taken out by a set of stairs. You still remember finding him curled up at the bottom of the stairs in your apartment building. He was trying to act like it was no big deal, but when he couldn’t stand up, you knew it was serious. You ruffle his hair as you pass by the couch.

“No, silly. I want to spend Halloween with you. Now come on, let me help you get in your costume.” 

You help him hobble to the bedroom and change into his How to Train Your Dragon onesie. You’ll surely be calling him Toothless all night. You put on your Light Fury onesie and pull up the hood, it’s warm and cozy, perfect for the chilly October evening. You’re helping Xavier get settled on the couch when the doorbell rings. You rush to answer and collect your takeout order - which is more food than you and Xavier need. 

“What’s this?” Xavier raises a brow at the containers you pull from the large bag and set on the coffee table.

“I thought we’d finally try the food from the new Indian restaurant down the road. I didn’t know what we’d like, so I got one of everything.” Xavier chuckles and leans forward to inspect the food.

Chicken curry, goat curry, butter chicken, mutton curry, masala vadai, white rice, coconut rice, lemon rice, naan, paal kozhukattai, hariyali chicken and two large chai teas. Xavier stares at you, then at the food, then back at you. You giggle and pass the remote to Xavier.

“You pick the movie.” 

Xavier flips through the movies and picks Nightmare Before Christmas. You both settle in for a cozy night together. With good food, good films and the best company. 

“Happy Halloween, my love.” Xavier whispers to you as he pulls the blanket over your shoulder. Your eyes half closed as you slowly slip into a food coma. You look up at him with the biggest smile. You love it when he gets all lovey dovey. He leans over and kisses you sweetly. 

“It’s the best Halloween I’ve ever had, even with a broken foot. Thank you.”

Rafayel:

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN’T HAVE TO SHAVE MY EYEBROWS OFF?” 

You can barely hear Rafayel’s screams over your own laughter. He’s standing before you in full costume, hair slicked back, ready to add the final touches. He was waiting for you to show up and help with his hair. When he opened the door to his home, you stared at him for a full minute before bursting into a fit of giggles.

“I told you - baHAA- I told you I could help you with your makeup! Raaaf what did you dooooo?!?” 

He has a hand clasped over his forehead and paces back and forth in his living room. The rest of his costume is perfect, a simple crisp white dress shirt unbuttoned to the naval, an undone black bow-tie, fitted black pants and dress shoes. He had covered his hands and torso with white paint and meticulously drawn on the various tattoos from the picture you sent. 

“I thought I had to! Stop laughing!!” His whines are adorable and you feel bad for not being able to control your giggle. 

“Okay okay okay, listen, let’s finish your makeup and go to the party. We’ll stop by the store on the way home and get some makeup and I’ll show you how to draw on some natural looking brows.” 

Rafayel sinks into his couch in defeat. He throws his head back and crosses his arms. He’s in full on pout mode. You focus on distracting him so he doesn’t sulk the whole evening. You straddle him on the couch and grab the makeup to help him finish getting ready. He stares at you, maintaining his best pout, but you can tell he’s happy you’re sitting on top of him, especially in your costume.

The simple baseball tee with “Daddy’s Lil Monster” printed across the chest, tiny red and blue shorts and fishnet tights, platform sneakers and you’ve repurposed your holster from work to hold fake guns. The most expensive part of your costume was the wig, you wanted to make sure it looked realistic. You DIY Harley bat leans against the wall near the front door. You were determined you and Rafayel would win the costume contest. 

You cover Rafayel’s face in the white paint and add black eye shadow all around his eyes. You’ve always wanted to put makeup on him, but he would never let you. When he said you could pick the costume for Halloween you knew exactly what you were going to pick. You just didn’t think he would commit so fully.

“You’ll have to draw on the face tattoos. You’re way better at that than I am.” Rafayel chuckles. “Oh, he laughs! He must be feeling so much better!” You tease. Rafayel’s smile instantly drops.

“No. I’m angry. I look ridiculous.” You give him a soft kiss, which makes his pout disappear once again.

“You look adorable. Don’t worry about your eyebrows okay? They’ll grow back.” 

Once you finish applying the green hairspray, he looks spectacular. A very sexy Leto inspired Joker. How is he still so hot without eyebrows?

You and Rafayel win the costume contest at the party that night. But honestly, that wasn’t your favorite part of the evening. Helping Rafayel practice drawing on fake brows will remain one of your favorite memories for a long time.

Zayne:

“Can I look now?” Zayne stands in the bedroom with his hands over his eyes. You hear his foot tapping, he’s so impatient tonight, it’s adorable. 

“One second! Oh shoot…” You struggle to reach the zipper on the back of your costume. The red, white and blue spandex leotard fits you like a glove and you’re excited to see Zayne’s reaction. You’re already giddy with excitement just looking at Zayne’s costume.

You knew Zayne wouldn’t be comfortable in a crazy costume. Especially at the hospital's annual Halloween party. He would still want to be professional around his colleagues. So you went searching Pinterest for a costume that he would be comfortable in, but would have a pairing that you could have fun with. 

“Okay, I might need your help with this… Can you keep your eyes closed and help me zip this up?” Zayne chuckles and reaches out his hands, eyes still closed. 

He still wore his glasses, which matched the costume perfectly. A white dress shirt unbuttoned half-way to show off a Superman t-shirt underneath, his dark dress pants held up with suspenders and you made him change into converse instead of dress shoes. He always wore dress shoes and suits, tonight he should be comfy. 

You walk up to him and turn around, backing up until his hands graze your shoulder. You shiver as his hands slowly feel their way down to the edges of your costume. He finds the zipper and gently tugs it upwards. It closes easily and you turn around, taking his hands in yours you kiss his knuckles. 

“So, now can I look?” You look up at Zayne and giggle. 

“I have to put on the accessories, but I guess… you can go ahead and look.” You drop his hands and put your hands on your hips, striking a confident pose.

Zayne opens his eyes and his ears immediately turn red as he looks over your costume. The Wonder Woman leotard fits you perfectly, showing off your toned physique. The fishnet tights you opted for making you feel sexy and confident. You picked flat boots instead of heels because you knew you’d be dancing and didn’t want Zayne to have to carry you home… like he did after the hospital’s charity ball over the summer. You’re looking in the mirror, securing the head piece, when Zayne comes up behind you. He places his hands on your hips.

“You look… amazing.” You smile, now your ears are turning red. “Are you sure you want to go to the party?” 

You’re surprised at his question. While he isn’t much of a party person, he loves holidays and wants you to have fun, even if it means dragging him to parties. You start to understand once you turn to face him. His cheeks are red to match his ears and his hands remain on your hips. He pulls you closer.

“Zayyyyne. Are you wanting to keep me all to yourself?” He doesn’t say anything, instead he bends down and places a tender kiss to your lips.

“Maybe.” He pulls back just enough to stare down at you with his glittering green eyes. 

“How about we leave early? Then you can have me all to yourself the rest of the night.” Zayne pulls you into a hug and sighs softly.

“Fine. But I can’t promise I won’t try to pick you up and carry you away.”

You place the back of your hand against your forehead dramatically. Holding onto one of Zayne’s suspenders with the other.

“Oh Superman, rescue me from all this social interaction!” Zayne pinches the bridge of his nose, but his smile remains.

“You don’t need anyone to rescue you. You’re a real life Wonder Woman. Stronger than anyone I know.”

Sylus:

“You’re not going to give me a hint?” Sylus has been calling you everyday this week asking for details or hints to what you’ve picked for this year's Halloween costume. 

“NO! You’ll find out tomorrow night.” You’re glad Sylus isn’t here, he’d probably convince you to tell him. Showering you with kisses until you caved.

“I heard Luke and Kieran whispering about a costume earlier. Please don’t tell me…” He doesn’t get a chance to finish speaking before you are giggling non-stop.

“Luke and Kieran are helping me. But I gave them strict instructions not to tell you anything.” 

“You really think they won’t tell me? I’m their boss.” His voice is sarcastic, but you can hear his footsteps picking up pace. He’s hunting them down, you’re sure of it.

“To be honest, I think they’re more afraid of me.” Sylus laughs.

“Let’s test your theory.” 

“No! Sylus don’t!! Please?” You beg.

“Fine. I won’t ask them. I’ll see you tomorrow night, kitten.” With that, he hangs up. You stare at your costume hanging on the door of your closet. You smile, trying to suppress your excitement for your first Halloween party with Sylus.

The next night you arrive at the Onychinus base early. Luke and Kieran show you Sylus’ costume and you squeal with excitement. You give them a quick hug before finding a spare room to get into your costume. Once you’re ready, you sneak down the hallway and knock on Sylus’ bedroom door.

“Come in.” You open the door slowly to reveal Sylus sitting in his armchair in the corner, a book in his hand. He lowers the book to look at you and you have to hold your breath to avoid laughing at his shocked reaction.

The leather body suit was a nightmare to slip on, but damn did you look good in it. The zipper along the chest unzipped just enough to let some of the October air keep you cool. The matching gloves have little claws attached to the fingers, not too sharp, but sharp enough to truly make you feel like a cat. Your black high heel boots strapped all the way up the ankle to keep you stable all evening. Your headband with cat ears pull back your long waves. Your ruby red lips curve into a smile as you watch Sylus eyeing you.

“You really took my little nickname for you seriously didn’t you, kitten?” Sylus stands and walks over to you. You reach out your hand and he takes it. 

Once you have secured his hand, you tug him to the door and down the hall. 

“Aha… where are we going?” Sylus laughs and follows you without hesitation.

You crack open his office door and peek inside. Laughing at the sight before you, before closing the door and turning to Sylus.

“Close your eyes.” Sylus chuckles and obeys. You open the door fully and gently lead him into the room. You let go of his hand to grab his arms to position him correctly. 

“Okay, open.” You stand back and cover your mouth in anticipation. Sylus opens his eyes and is stunned, unable to speak, trying to comprehend what he’s seeing.

Luke and Kieran stand before him. Luke dressed in green ripped jeans, green converse, he has his torso painted green and fake ivy vines wrapped around his arms and some of his chest and stomach. His ginger hair an even brighter shade of red against the green paint spread across his face. Kieran is dressed in half red, half blue jeans, a studded belt hugs his hips, he has a matching half red and blue jacket unzipped to show his bare torso. His ginger locks lightly colored with hints of bright red and blue. Red and blue eye shadow are swept across his eyelids as well. He drapes his arms over the baseball bat that rests on his shoulders behind his head.

“Happy Halloween!” The pair say in unison before parting to show Sylus’ costume placed on a mannequin behind them.

It has to be the most accurate Batman costume Sylus has ever seen. Now that charge from the costume store makes more sense. He was wondering what costume could POSSIBLY cost so much. It’s impressive really. He turns to smile at you.

“Batman and Catwoman?” 

“And Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn!” Luke says enthusiastically. Sylus chuckles and moves closer to examine the costume.

“What do you think?” You anxiously pick at the fake claws attached to your gloves. You worry he might hate the idea. Sylus walks over to you, pulls you in by the waist and places a kiss to your forehead. 

“I love it. It’ll be fun to play hero for the night.” You hug Sylus tightly around the waist before he pulls away, ushering you to the door so he can get into costume. 

Sylus looks so damn good dressed up as Batman. His ruby eyes shimmering behind the mask, the muscles on the costume look almost identical to his and the cape… Sylus won’t admit it, but he has been fluttering that cape all night. Standing next to Sylus, the Catwoman to his Batman, you feel like you can take on anything the universe throws at you.

(I would also die over art of Luke & Kieran as gender-bent Poison Ivy & Harley Quinn... Just sayin...)

Thank you for reading!!

[pain-in-the-butler]

I'm a bit curious but can coattails ciel rank the people in his surroundings from least bothersome to most bothersome? (I'm kind of curious where sebastian or the midfords would be)

Oh, hm! Could Ciel rank them, probably not, but maybe I could do it for him lol. That’s sort of a complicated question I imagine... Both considering it’s Ciel and considering he’s a teenager, I think he finds everyone in his life at least a little bit bothersome. And sometimes the people who bother him the most at other times bother him the least — or when they bother him, they're actually helping him in ways he can’t allow himself to feel yet. I wonder who I could be referring to there...

Anyway, here is my best guess at his least to most bothersome list!

Diedrich: Ciel actually probably likes Diedrich a fair bit, and this definitely owes itself to how little Ciel sees him and how uninvested Di seems in his personal life. Their relationship feels very business-centered to Ciel, which he likes, but there is also an unspoken comfort that comes from knowing that Diedrich is an old family friend. Ciel likes bullying him for sport because Diedrich is rather toothless about it. But Ciel also admires him and wants Diedrich’s good opinion. Meanwhile, Diedrich is the child-free uncle who has no idea how kids work and probably imagines Ciel thinks little good of him.

Tanaka: Though he doesn’t really let himself feel it all the time, Ciel thinks the world of Tanaka and loves him like a grandfather. He shows Tanaka his true emotions more readily than he would with his blood relatives, but is still cautious because he sees Tanaka as someone he could frighten off if he were to be too honest about his anger and sadness. It’s part of why he feels so nervous whenever Tanaka tries to have an earnest conversation with him. He doesn’t like when Tanaka tries to understand him emotionally, but he feels more guilty about it than truly bothered.

Agni: Ciel and Agni don't have much of a close relationship, though I'm sure Ciel would be embarrassed if he knew how often Sebastian went to Agni for advice, and even more embarrassed if he knew how much Agni cared for him. That said, while Ciel sees Agni as a really good butler, he also sees him as an idiot to be so blinded by devotion for Soma of all people. Ciel is not a very nice boy sometimes…

Bard, Mey-Rin, and Finny: While their care for him can feel strange for Ciel at times, ultimately Bard, Mey-Rin, and Finny’s annoyances are very surface level. Ciel likes that they make life harder for Sebastian, and he also feels very soothed by their honesty and simplicity. To him, their love is genuine and unfettered and unable to be marred, like the love of dogs towards a kind master, it’s pretty rude honestly — but right now it’s harder for him to grasp that their love is as complicated as anyone else’s, and it’s only under these invented circumstances that Ciel is capable of quietly accepting it.

Lizzie: Lizzie is another person whose annoyances mainly rest on the surface. She likes raucous music and clothes that stand out and gossip and sports; she’s very energetic, highly social, and not easily embarrassed. She’s largely the opposite of Ciel, and so there’s strain there. He often feels like he has to put up with her, but he’s able to acknowledge that she also has to put up with him, and it’s surprising for Ciel that she can still like him regardless. It bothers him that she likes to kiss him on the cheek so much lately, but he feels even more bothered by the fact that he doesn’t like it. Ciel both sees Lizzie as a silly girl with silly whims and as someone entirely accomplished in dozens of ways he isn’t.

Edward: Meanwhile, Ciel does not have a secret high opinion of Edward at all. In fact, Ciel sees Edward as almost entirely annoying, but since Edward’s even more fun to annoy back, he doesn’t fall as low on the list. Still, Ciel regards his oldest cousin rather unfavorably. Perhaps this opinion will change in the future…

Alexis: Ciel’s only uncle boggles his mind with his displays of affection and boisterous kindness. And after trying to give Ciel “the talk” in public, Alexis especially solidified himself as an annoyance. Behind the ridiculousness, Ciel knows his uncle is very intelligent and trustworthy, but does he have to be so overbearing…

Soma: No one can speedrun getting on Ciel’s last nerve quite like Soma can. All he has to do is cry out, “Hey Ciel, listen!” and the kid’s blood pressure is already skyrocketing. Similarly to Lizzie, Soma is also very much the opposite of Ciel: high energy, highly needy, and very childish in nature. Soma is not good at keeping himself entertained, and that need for constant companionship (and conversation) ensures that Ciel’s interactions with the prince will stay limited. But somehow the idea of Soma not being in his life at all feels worse… not that Ciel will ever admit it to anyone, including himself.

Francis: Ciel’s relationship with his aunt has become much more tenuous since he hit puberty. He still has a lot of respect for her, but he’s livid with her sudden desire to play a larger role in his upbringing. Her exerting her opinion over his life and trying to insinuate that she always could makes him want to tear his hair out. If it were modern times, he would surely be screaming, “You’re not the boss of me!” and slamming the bedroom door in her face. Of course, he’s essentially already doing that with…

Sebastian: Because who possibly annoys an easily-annoyed teenager more than a parent? And Sebastian was already a headache well before he took on that parental role, but the addition of kindness and forcing emotional conversations has perfectly cemented Sebastian as the biggest bother in the universe. Sebastian is the one being in Ciel’s life that cannot ever go away for good, a fact that brings Ciel rage and comfort in equal measure. Soma may be irritating, Aunt Francis may be presumptuous, but Sebastian is both of those things and an idiot to boot. And his constant insistence that Ciel is still a child who needs to be looked after and coddled? The only thing worse than that notion is the fact that sometimes Sebastian is right.

Sebastian is easily the king of pissing Ciel off. At the same time, he’s the only one Ciel can show the full brunt of his angry, sad, annoyed, tender emotions to without fearing that Sebastian might go away forever. With that in mind, could Sebastian also be the least bothersome here…? Would this list be better understood if it was not presented as a linear rank but rather a circle that loops all the way around…? Hmm, I wonder……..

[rideonwings]

The Enevitable Cliche Quarantine Story

Chapter 2

Pairing: Hiccup/Astrid

Summary: Stranger-Neighbors lean on each other during the quarantine

A/N: See, I told you all, I never start posting WIPs because I feel too guilty when I don't update them. Now here I am, weeks later, feeling like I've left you all hanging. This one is short and sweet, but hopefully worth it? Hoping everyone is staying safe and healthy out there.

AO3 Link 

Astrid: “Okay, guys, only 30 more seconds, keep those hips up! 30 seconds is nothing, then you’re done for the day!”

Astrid felt silly, talking to her phone camera like it was a crowd of people, but this was currently her source of income, so she was willing to be as enthusiastic as she possibly could.

“Okay, time! Great work everyone, go ahead and come down to your stomach, then shoulders back, stretch out those abs in a cobra.”

As she finished up the stretch routine, Stormfly took the opportune moment to come to rest under her chest. Astrid laughed, turning her head to rest her head against the cat’s soft fur.

“Thank you to everyone who participated today, thank you for taking the time for yourself, be safe, wash your hands, and stay sane! See you tomorrow!”

She reached over to stop the video, Stormfly protesting beneath her as she shifted on top of her. She then collected her yoga mat and weights and stacked them back in the corner of her apartment, wiping her brow as she went.

Settling on the couch, Astrid started reviewing the video. The lighting in her apartment wasn’t great, making the video shadowy and not particularly detailed. She’d have to figure out a better location for the future, because unfortunately, she needed as many people as possible to watch her videos, lest the gym decided she wasn’t worth keeping on the payroll. Still, she made some quick edits and posted it to the gym’s YouTube channel and Facebook page with a peppy message she wasn’t really feeling.

She was already sick of her apartment. When Astrid had decided to live here, she hadn’t been particularly picky, seeing as she normally spent a significant portion of her day outside its walls. Now, every flaw and inconvenience was right in front of her constantly, and she was over it. She had heard Hiccup leave the apartment this morning, presumably to walk Toothless, and was instantly jealous that she couldn’t join them. She vowed to go for a run later, to break up the monotony.

Grabbing herself a mug of tea and one of her books for her thesis, she found her way back out onto the balcony. Hiccup wasn’t out in his area, which she was surprisingly disappointed about: she’d enjoyed their chat yesterday. Still, she didn’t spend too much time on it, instead copying her position from yesterday with her legs pulled into her sweatshirt and delving into her book. She made notes along the margins and nocked pages as she read, finding key quotes she could later incorporate in her writing.

It was cloudier today than the day before, and the breeze was making her slightly uncomfortable. She was about to give up and head inside when the sliding door to her right opened and a messy head of hair poked out. He turned to look at her and smiled, the tiny gap in his teeth clearly visible even from this distance. Toothless slipped out between his legs and darted towards the railing to say hello to her.

“Hey!” He said exuberantly. “I was just checking to see if it was warm enough to bring my stuff out here to work. Are you cold?”

Astrid curled her legs in closer to herself, putting her mug on the ground. “Yeah, it’s not as nice as yesterday. I was thinking about going in.”

Just then, a particularly harsh gust of wind whipped through, making her shiver. She rose from the chair and began to collect her things as Hiccup winced, closing the door a bit to prevent air from getting into his apartment. “Yeah, probably a good call for now. I might come out later for a drink, if you'd want to join me?” He sounded oddly hopeful, which tugged at Astrid’s heart.

She hugged her book closer to her chest and nodded, smiling a little. Hiccup’s smile widened and he waved slightly before ducking back inside, whistling for Toothless. Astrid ducked her head and suppressed a chuckle as she made her way back inside, settling on the couch with her book.

Hiccup As he got up for the umpteenth time to stretch, Hiccup cursed his furniture choices for the hundredth time in two days. The chair he had at his desk was not exactly conducive to good posture, and his back was aching from being hunched over his monitors. As lucky as he was to have this kind of office setup in his apartment, he’d never really had to use it long term and had picked a fairly cheap office chair from a local big box store. It hadn’t seemed like a big deal at the time, but he was regretting that choice now. He felt like he had to get up every twenty minutes and shake out some kink in his back or hips.

Every time he stood up, Toothless jumped up too, following him around the apartment, obviously hoping they were going for another walk.

“Sorry, buddy, not yet,” he murmured, running his hand over the dog’s silky ears. “Give me another hour and we’ll go out.” He stretched his arms over his head, releasing the knots in his shoulders and neck. The motion twinged something lower in his back, making him sigh in frustration. Finally, he flopped onto the floor, laying flat on his back and straightening out as much as he could to align his spine.

He stared at the ceiling for a few moments before Toothless’ head appeared in his vision, obviously perplexed at why his owner was copying his signature nap position. The dog sniffed around his hairline, checking for signs of distress, before he began to lap at Hiccup’s cheeks with his tongue, making Hiccup squawk in distress and curl into the fetal position.

Toothless barked excitedly, thinking they were playing a game, and pawed at Hiccup’s back to get him to re-engage.

“Toothless, no!” Hiccup cried, swatting his arms blindly to shoo the dog away.

After a few minutes, Toothless fell into his play position, forelegs flat on the ground and rear in the air, tail whipping almost dangerously as his human rolled over to glare at him. Hiccup’s face was sticky and smelly, but he couldn’t hold a grudge against his buddy for long. He reached out with both arms and tackled the dog, pulling him against his chest and rolling around as Toothless yipped in excitement. Their tussle didn’t last long before they were both flat on the rug, both of their mouths open wide in humor.

Suddenly, Toothless’ ears perked and he jumped up and darted to the sliding door to the balcony. He’d started doing that whenever Astrid opened the door, looking to greet his new friend. The habit made Hiccup smile for more reasons than one.

Honestly, since the quarantine had started (had it only been a few days?), he’d come to realize how much of his social life had depended on his job. He had very few friends outside of work, and though he felt somewhat isolated in his apartment, he couldn’t think of anyone he really wanted to talk to. He chatted with Fishlegs while he was working, and exchanged a few messages with a few other friends, but he always struggled to come up with new topics.

But he really liked talking to Astrid. Their conversations hadn’t exactly been in-depth or long, but she seemed quick and funny and he needed that kind of conversation in his life right now.

He walked over to the balcony window, trying to get a glimpse of the blonde. From what he could see, she was wearing heavy leggings and a zip-up hoodie, and her cheeks were flushed as she leaned over the balcony railing. He slid the door open and poked his head out.

“Hey,” he greeted lamely. As she turned to look at him, he saw the glistening of sweat on her brow and noticed the shirt under her quarter zip was dark along the neckline. “Go for a run?” He asked.

Astrid nodded, still slightly out of breath. “It felt so good to be outside,” she said, popping one of her legs onto the railing to stretch. “I wanted to keep going forever.”

Hiccup’s eyes widened a little as he took in her long, toned legs in her running shorts, but forced himself to meet her gaze again and relax his expression. “I know the feeling. Those walks with Toothless are never long enough.”

“Still working?” She asked, gesturing to his open sliding door as she switched legs. He nodded, shrugging a little.

“Toothless keeps bugging me to go outside” he said, suddenly remembering that he was just nearly licked to death by the lab and he probably looked like it too. He absently ran his hands through his hair, finding it still wet.

“Oh, I could’ve taken him! I didn’t even think to ask!” Astrid said, bringing her leg down and settling into a crouch by the railing closest to Hiccup’s balcony. Toothless shoved his head through the bars as far as he could reach, forcing his eyes closed comically.

“That’s nice of you,” Hiccup replied, smiling down at the dog. “I’m going to go in an hour though, so he’s fine. Maybe some other time if I get caught up in conference call hell.”

Astrid nodded, picking up a water bottle from her chair and taking a drink. “I’m going to take a shower. Can I bug you later for dinner ideas?” She asked, smiling cheekily.

“Sure thing,” Hiccup said, feeling his cheeks flush slightly. Interacting with Astrid made him feel a little bit like a schoolboy with a crush. She was definitely more attractive than any girl he’d ever been with, and seemed friendly and sane enough. He could definitely see himself being friends with her, and then… who knew?

As she turned to re-enter her apartment, she smiled over her shoulder at him.

Hiccup smiled weakly back, turning to go back inside himself. He paused with his hand on the handle, half looking back in her direction, smiling to himself a little more confidently, even as his stomach flipped.

Who knew?

[keeperofhounds]

A Dragon and her Boy (Chapter One)

Thinking back on that day Varian often wondered how everything just fell into place. It wasn’t a day where every single problem he had magically disappeared. Life just doesn’t work that way. It wasn’t a day where he found some profound destiny either, that would be silly. No, it was the day Varian made a new friend.

Varian had been four years old that day when he discovered his passion for alchemy. It wasn’t something anyone Varian’s age would normally be interested in but that’s how it was for Varian. No one was interested in alchemy and other kids would rather spend their time running around in the dirt. And they called him weird.

“Come on Daddy you promised that we could go to the castle today,” Varian said, following his father Quirin around their castle. He had been looking forward to the chance to spend more time with his daddy.

Looking down at his son, Quirin felt bad at the words he replied to his son, “I’m sorry Varian, not today I need to work on running the fields.”

Varian’s face fell at the words, of course, his daddy was busy when wasn’t he? He understood really, he did his daddy had to help all the people in the village. Sometimes though he really wanted all his daddy’s attention for himself, was that too much to ask? Well, Varian could be patient it was harvest season after all.

“Okay daddy I understand,” he said, before heading outside towards the nearby forest. Maybe Varian could study some of the fauna or find some cool rocks in the forest. Varian had read a book saying that some flowers could do really cool things if he mixed them with the right stuff. The boy was getting ahead of himself though he still needed to find, well anything.

The search for anything to alleviate Varian’s disappointment was fruitless. There was nothing new or exciting that he could do to distract himself in the forest. He tried climbing the trees, but they were too tall for the four-year-old. He dug a hole with a random stick but found no buried treasure. It was just another disappointment. The boy hadn’t gotten that far since he didn’t want to get lost either.

Now Varian was swinging his stick hitting the bushes, “I wish something would just happen already it’s no fun doing things alone all the time.”

The bushes rustled behind him startling him backward. Turning around quickly to face the moving bush Varian held up his stick ready to strike. Varian hoped it wasn’t anything dangerous the very thought of hurting an animal made his stomach drop. Slowly he slid his feet towards the bushes.

“W-who ever you are I’m armed! S-so you better not mess with me!”

The bushes stopped moving at those words, Varian hoped that he was able to scare whoever was in the bushes off. Lowering his makeshift weapon Varian crept over to the bush. He leaned forward, left, right, and tip-toed to see over the bush. Nothing.

“I guess it must have been a bunny.”

Turning his back towards the bush Varian started to walk away. That’s when the creature hiding in the bushes pounced.

If Quirin had been in the range of his son, the sound of his terrified screaming would have caused the father to drop everything. This wasn’t the case when Varian fell to the ground all he wanted was his daddy to save him from whatever jumped him. The thing was still on his back keeping him on the ground. All he could do was throw his hands over his head and covered it in an attempt to prevent any harm.

Varian couldn’t help but feel his eyes start to mist over. He tried to keep it together he was brave, and he was a big boy. Yet he was so upset that he couldn’t help crying failing to notice that the creature on him was doing nothing to harm him.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

When the little dragon snuck away from the Hidden World, she was excited. She had grown up hearing stories of her father the King’s adventures. The adventures he went on with the funny human creatures who visit every year. It’s always exciting to listen about the forbidden friendship.

Her mother had different views of the human creatures telling stories of their cruelty and dangers. That wasn’t to say that the views of those creatures were dominant. As the King taught to her brothers and herself there are good and bad among everyone, Humans just happen to think they know best about the world around them.

Be wary of them he warned especially ones you have never met before. He was also clear that you can see their intentions through their eyes. Whatever that meant.

“You would have to meet one and become friends with them to understand.”

She wanted to know what he meant, especially the part of those creatures giving them a name. Mother didn’t have one, but she didn’t look like she was wanting but her father and his friends kept these names close to their hearts as they reminded them of the people they left behind. That was why she convinced her brothers to sneak out with her that winter day.

The little dragon learned a lot that day, they saw so many humans. They saw their father's friend fall off a cliff and got grounded when they came home. Not that such a little set back was going to stop her.

This time she decided to ditch her brothers during their usual adventure time at home.

Looking at the forest and many different creatures in the area was an experience. They were nothing like the ones at home nothing glowing and everything else was not a dragon. That wasn’t what she was here for though she wanted to see a human settlement.

Which is how she found herself on the young humans back. She had assumed that by pouncing him as she did with her brothers the creature might play with her. Now he was making strange noises, but she could at least recognize a cry of fear.

 Jumping off the humans back the young dragon walked over to his covered face. Looking at his scarred face was not what she wanted, she just wanted to have some fun with a human-like her father used too.

“I’m sorry,” she said, nudging her head against his head.

Finally feeling the weight of the creature off his back, Varian slowly took his hands off his head. He gasped, “A dragon, wow.”

Varian scooted away in shock; he had never seen a dragon before. Taking a deep breath, he leaned toward the dragon turning his head sideways. The dragon did the same, Varian couldn’t help but think it was very cute. Only she also turned her snout up in a gummy smile.

“You’re toothless!” Varian laughed, pointing at the black and white dragon.

The dragon growled happily, “That’s the name my dad likes!”

Not that Varian could understand her all he heard from the dragon were happy growls. He saw the dragon jump around similar to a dog wanting attention. The dragon wasn’t scary, she looked like she just wanted to play.

“Do you wanna play?”

The dragon wagged her tail communicating to him that that’s exactly what she wanted. Picking up the discarded stick he shook at the dragon. “You want the stick? You want the stick?”

He threw the stick, but the dragon didn’t go after it instead tilting her head in a way that asked, ‘what was he doing?’ Varian blushed looks like she didn’t want to play fetch.

“So, what do you want to play?” he asked, wringing his hands against his stomach.

That’s how they spent the next few hours playing with each other. The dragon chased Varian and Varian chased the dragon in the game of tag. Racing through the woods Varian chased the dragon tripping against a store falling on his face.

Seeing Varian fall the dragon flew towards her new-fallen friend, “Are you okay?”

Varian jumped on his feet, “Boo!”

The dragon screamed laughing as she dashed away from Varians ‘surprise’ attack. She had been so focused on Varian she didn’t notice the mass of meat that was in the way. Pawing at her head when she fell to the ground she looked up and was met with the green eyes of her father.

“I'm a catch you…” Looking at the black scaled dragon Varian looking up at his regal appearance slowing to a stop. “Wow.”

He turned to the little dragon, “Is that your daddy?”

The older dragon narrowed his eyes at her message was clear, “Home now.”

“Varian! Varian, it’s time to come home!” Quirin called from the distance.

“That’s my daddy. I have to go.” Varian said, rushing over and giving her a hug, “I liked playing with you I hope we can play again.” He gave a kiss on her head. “Bye Delmira!”

Varian dashed away towards his home leaving Delmira alone with her father. Looking at her father Delmira gave him a toothless grin. Toothless snorted, “Don’t think you’re not getting grounded.”

Delmira groaned following after her father as he flew away. Even though she knew she was going to get grounded thinking about the fun she had today it was worth it.

“I like Delmira,” She told her father.

[hatari-translations]

Dansið eða deyið (Dance or Die) - transcript/translation

This is the first song performed by Hatari at the 2017 KEXPort show, the one misidentified as Ógleði on YouTube, where Matthías rages at the audience while Klemens sings of everything burning. It was also performed at punk festival Norðanpaunk in 2016. This transcript is mostly based on the KEXPort video. As so often, it’s very hard to tell what Klemens is singing, but I gave it my best shot and I think I’ve got most of it figured out.

The first “verse” here is an intro that I think Matthías just improvises for each show; the one in the Norðanpaunk video is quite different. (I have already transcribed and translated that intro too and will be posting that later.)

Icelandic transcript

MATTHÍAS:

Við erum Hatari!

Við erum öll Hatari!

Við erum varan og neytandinn!

Við erum múrverkið og mótmælin!

Við erum glæpurinn og böðullinn!

Við erum Bastillan og við erum byltingin!

Þrælar!

Gengilbeinur ræningja!

Sníkjudýr brauðmylsna!

Tannlausu kjölturakkar!

Blindingjar og aumingjar!

Neytendur og klámhundar!

Grindhoruðu betlarar!

Marklausu peð!

Leiksoppar hrægamma!

Hö!

Úrhrök!

Sameinist, ómagar, bak í bak og dansið!

KLEMENS:

Ómagar

MATTHÍAS:

Dansið, eða lútið oki kúgarans!

KLEMENS:

Kúgarans

MATTHÍAS:

Það er núna eða aldrei!

Dansið eða deyið!

KLEMENS:

Dansið eða...

MATTHÍAS:

Varpið hulunni af hendi myrkrahöfðingjans!

Steypið af stóli þrælapískaranum og látið hann súpa eigið meðal!

Sameinist, ómagar, og þrælið aldrei framar!

Sameinist, ómagar, bak í bak og dansið!

Dansið eða lútið oki kúgarans!

KLEMENS:

Kúgarans

MATTHÍAS:

Það er núna eða aldrei!

Dansið eða deyið!

KLEMENS:

Mín(?) fagra, kæra,

vertu hjá mér þegar allt mun brenna

Fylgi þér hvert sem er

Við munum saman líta

himinn klofna, enda veraldar

Fylgi þér hvert sem er

Mín fagra, kæra,

vertu hjá mér þegar allt mun brenna

Fylgi þér hvert sem er

Mín fagra kæra,

vertu hjá mér þegar allt mun brenna

Fylgi þér hvert sem er

Transcription notes

For a while I thought it was “Við munum saman líta hug minn klofna á enda veraldar”, but then years later I was listening to it and suddenly realized it’s himinn klofna, sorry about that. “Fylgi þér hvert sem er”, on the other hand, took a tip from someone else. Damn it Klemens, sing clearer.

English translation

MATTHÍAS:

We are Hatari!

We are all Hatari!

We are the product and the consumer!

We are the masonry and the protest!

We are the crime and the executioner!

We are the Bastille and we are the revolution!

Slaves!

Servants of robbers!

Parasites on breadcrumbs!

Toothless lapdogs!

The blind and the pathetic!

Consumers and degenerates!

Emaciated beggars!

Meaningless pawns!

Puppets of vultures!

Huh!

Wretches!

Unite, rejects, back to back, and dance!

KLEMENS:

Rejects

MATTHÍAS:

Dance, or submit to the abuse of the oppressor!

KLEMENS:

Oppressor

MATTHÍAS:

It's now or never!

Dance or die!

KLEMENS:

Dance or...

MATTHÍAS:

Unmask the hand of the dark lord!

Dethrone the slave-driver and give him a taste of his own medicine!

Unite, rejects, and slave away no more!

Unite, rejects, back to back, and dance!

Dance or submit to the abuse of the oppressor!

KLEMENS:

Oppressor

MATTHÍAS:

It's now or never!

Dance or die!

KLEMENS:

My beautiful dearest,

stay with me while everything burns

I’ll follow you anywhere

We will watch together

as the sky splits apart, the end of the world

I’ll follow you anywhere

My beautiful dearest,

stay with me while everything burns

I’ll follow you anywhere

My beautiful dearest,

stay with me while everything burns

I’ll follow you anywhere

Translation notes

The word I’ve translated as “degenerates”, “klámhundar”, is literally “porn-dogs”, which sounds pretty silly but it’s an established Icelandic word. Maybe “perverts” would’ve been more accurate, but I was trying very hard to maintain the merciless, angry but extremely articulate tone of the original, and degenerates just works better.

[dmitri-smerdyakov]

So it’s been a while, huh?

I don’t know how many people are actually still following this blog/are interested in it but...hi again! I already wrote a post sort of explaining where I disappeared to and why (long story short: it was tumblr staff’s fault) but I also want to talk to you guys properly and update you all on what’s been going on since.

I don’t want to abandon this blog but I have another blog that I’m using now -> it’s @alwaysahiccupandastrid. It’s not as Beasts oriented as this one was, I’m afraid, but still feel free to follow it and chat to me! It’s much like this blog was when I used it in that I don’t really post exclusively for one fandom, it’s just a mix of whatever I like!

Anyway, updating! I already told you guys that I graduated university in July, finished my degree...that was stressful! A lot went down at university but it sorted itself out in the end and I survived! Our final assessment was at the end of May, and we performed a show that we created four times, three nights and one matinee. I’m very proud of what we achieved all things considered! But yes...I am no longer a university student!

What else has changed?

I no longer work for the cinema anymore - I quit a few weeks ago after getting a job at a fancy hotel that was supposedly better...I quit the day after my first shift because I had a “me too” experience with another employee...without too much detail, he touched and started kissing me, and I left. I struggled for a couple of weeks trying urgently to get a new job, and I’m now working for Superdrug! My first shift was Wednesday afternoon/evening and I’m excited to start properly! It’s not permanent: I’m also hoping to hear back from Nikon soon about an admin position that’s closer to home and pays extremely well!

I no longer see that therapist who likes Harry Potter - I think I talked a little bit on here about my counsellor who was also a Harry Potter fan and who I liked? Yeah...turns out not so much? I stopped going to her because she a) screamed at me for waiting in the waiting room until my bus was due to arrive down the road and b) she got pissed because I couldn’t do a few certain weeks due to show rehearsals. I’m honestly all the better for it frankly.

More tattoos! - Okay so it’s not a super important thing but it’s a change so...! I think when I was last on his blog I had 3 tattoos - I now have 8! So in addition to the wand, the “worrying means you suffer twice”, and the Deathly Hallows symbol, I now have a tattoo of Leta’s flower from the Lestrange family tree (with her name and the words “beautiful. Separate.”; a tiny tattoo of Harry’s scar/glasses; a Night Fury/Toothless tattoo with the words “heart of a chief” and “soul of a dragon”; the Chief symbol from HTTYD 2; and the words “Night Fury” in Viking runes.

My hair?! - Again, not important but hey! Let’s celebrate! My hair finally grew back and is now blonde! It’s not too long, just about to my shoulders, and my roots are dark blonde whilst the bottom is more bright blonde from dying it in March. It’s silly but hooray!

I met Kevin Guthrie in March! - I met Mr Abernathy himself at Comic Con in London and he was LOVELY. He was such a wonderful man, so cheerful and amazing with the fans. I had some pretty interesting conversations with him about Fantastic Beasts and whether he’ll be in the next one...we shall see! He also told us that Poppy Corby-Tuech (Vinda Rosier) is “all about the cosplay”! And ofc I got some photos with him :)

I’m now 21 - my birthday was obviously in January and I’m old(er) 😂😭 I didn’t do anything too special, just saw CoG with the family and then a few days later went to the WB Studio Tour again (which was amazing because my sister has a friend who works there and was showing us props lots of people won’t ever see!)

Mental Health crap - Obviously I’m not “cured” or anything. I’m still on Sertraline for my depression (haven’t taken the anxiety one for a while but that is a whole other kettle of fish!) and I still have problems but I’m not as low as I have been these past few years on this blog. I’m proud to say that I have been self-harm free since about March or April (it’s hard to remember since the months blur together), and I’m genuinely all the better for it! Part of it is because I didn’t want to damage my tattoos on my arms but it’s also because I’ve managed to resist the urge as well!

^ Having said that, I’m on the waiting list to see a doctor/specialist because my GP said there was a possibility I could have autism/Aspergers/be on the spectrum. It’s a LONG waiting list in the UK so it could be a while until I see a specialist, but there’s that. It’s not a bad thing necessarily since it might be a step closer to making sure I get the exact treatment/help I need.

Fandom junk - I already mentioned in my earlier posts that since late February/early March, I’ve gotten REALLY into How To Train Your Dragon. It’s now my main fandom, in fact, which is sad because the last film has come out and there’s just a half an hour Christmas special left to be released this winter 😭 but HTTYD has had such an impact on my life and my mental state, like it has genuinely made me so much happier and (in my opinion) a better person. I still love Fantastic Beasts and Harry Potter (I even went to King’s Cross at the beginning of the month for Back to Hogwarts Day!) but it’s not my main fandom right now; I had to take a breather from Beasts and the Beasts fandom because it’s really not a great place to be at times. But I’m still into it and I’m waiting for the third film to come out in 2021!

Other random/rather unimportant stuff:

My bed is now overrun with Build a Bear dragons (and the odd baby Niffler)

My sister turned 18 and I’m so...old? I feel so old now omg

I’ve been trying to help the environment by taking little steps like going out litter picking (both on my own and with my dad) whenever I can, and I’ve been using the Ecosia search app as much as possible (for every 45 searches, they’ll plant a new tree!)

I went to Disneyland Paris again in June and it was a lot of fun, I met Peter/Wendy/Alice/Mad Hatter again, there was a false alarm because some twat left their bag at the meet and greet so they had to get the sniffer dog and everything, and I also met Donald Duck, Stitch, Tiana/Naveen AND Rapunzel (Rapunzel is my sister’s absolute favourite, so I’m happy she got to meet her!)

This may be super lame but I got so happy because I got noticed on Twitter several times by Jay Baruchel (the guy who plays Hiccup in How To Train Your Dragon - he’s so awesome and loves the character btw), his fiancée who’s a model keeps liking some of my posts on Instagram, and Cressida Cowell, who wrote the original How To Train Your Dragon books (which are vastly different to the movies but omg they’re so amazing?!), liked a tweet I sent her about my Toothless tattoo and she loved it?! I’m having a good year celebrity/famous people wise for some reason?! 😂❤️

I dont know if my blog was still in use when this happened but I’ll mention it anyway... I SAW EZRA AGAIN IN DECEMBER!! I went to watch Sons of an Illustrious Father play in London and it was GLORIOUS. Ezra Miller is GLORIOUS.

(I won’t post pictures of all the stuff here but... soon maybe?)

So that’s all I can think of...it’s been so long since I used this blog and I felt bad just abandoning it, so here we are.

I don’t know how much I’ll still use this blog, but as I said, I definitely don’t want to just abandon it. At the moment, I’m logged into this account on my iPod and onto my account on my phone, and I think I’ll keep it that way. I don’t know how much posting I’ll do here but I’ll still be around, and I’ll try to see if I can keep this blog alive alongside my current one, if people want me to!

I hope you guys are doing well, and I’m glad to have this blog back. Even if you follow my new blog and have been for the last few months, it’s still awesome to be talking to guys again on this account!

If you guys want to chat or say anything, feel free! Like I said, if people still want me to be active on here then just let me know and I’ll do my best! ☺️

[yespoetry]

A Selection of Sergei Yesenin Poems Translated by Anton Yakovlev

Translator’s Note: This selection contains a range of poems spanning his full literary career, from 1910 when he was 15 years old, to the last year of his life (1925).

As you will see, many of the poems are untitled, not unusually for Russian poems, and marked with standard three asterisks (and identified by first line in tables of contents, conversation or scholarship). I've included the years of composition under each poem since that might help add some historic context (which of course includes World War I and the Bolshevik Revolution of 1917).

* * *

 High water has licked

The silt with smoke.

The moon has dropped

Its yellow reins.

 Paddling a punt,

I bump into banks.

Red haystacks by the fence rails

Look like churches.

 With mournful cawing

In the silence of marshes

The black grouse

Is calling for vespers.

 In blue gloom the grove

Shrouds the destitution…

Secretly I will pray

For your future.

 <1910>

* * *

 Is it my fault that I’m a poet

Of heavy suffering and bitter fate?

After all, it wasn’t my choice—

It’s just the way I came into the world.

 Is it my fault that I don’t cherish life,

That I love and simultaneously hate everyone,

And know things about myself I don’t yet see—

That is my gift from the muse.

 I know there is no happiness in life,

Life is lunacy, the dream of a sick soul,

And I know my gloomy tunes bore everyone,

But it’s not my fault—that’s the kind of poet I am.

 <1911—1912>

  The Birch

 The white birch

Under my window

Wrapped herself in snow

As though in silver.

 Like snow borders

On fluffy branches,

White fringes of tassels

H    ave blossomed.

 And the birch stands

In listless silence,

And the snowflakes burn

In the golden fire.

 And the dawn, lazily

Walking around,

Sprinkles t   he branches

With new silver.

 <1913>

* * *

 Out came the Lord to test humanity’s love,

Walked out into a field in the guise of a beggar.

An old man sitting on a stump in an oak grove

Was chewing a dry crumpet with his toothless mouth.

 The old man saw the beggar walking

Down the path with an iron cane

And thought, “What a poor, sick fellow—

I bet it’s hunger that’s making him teeter.”

 The Lord walked up to him, hiding his sorrow and pain,

Thinking he couldn’t awaken anyone’s heart...

And the old man extended his hand,

“Here, chew on this... you’ll feel a little stronger.”

 <1914>

* * *

 In the land of yellow nettle

And dried-out wattle

Village huts, like orphans,

Cling to willows.

 In the fields, behind the ravine’s blue thicket,

Among green lakes,

The sand road stretches up to

The Siberian Mountains.

 Lost somewhere in Mordva and Chuda,

Russia knows no fear,

And the people, the people in shackles

Walk down that road.

 All of them are murderers or thieves,

As ordained by fate.

I’ve fallen in love with their sad eyes

And their hollow cheeks.

 There is so much evil and joy in killers.

Their hearts are simple.

But their blue mouths grin

On their blackened faces.

 In secret, I cherish one dream:

That I’m pure of heart.

But I too will knife someone to death

One whistling autumn.

 And on a windy route,

Perhaps on this very same sand,

They will lead me, rope on my neck,

To fall in love with anguish.

 And when I smile, in passing,

Stretching my chest,

The bad weather will lick the road of my life

With its tongue.

 <1915>

* * *

 I’m tired of living in my native land,

Yearning for the vast fields of buckwheat.

I’ll leave my shack

To be a vagrant and a thief.

 I’ll walk the white curls of the day

To look for some wretched lodging.

And, seeing me, my best friend

Will sharpen his boot knife.

 The yellow road is entwined

With the spring and the meadow sun,

And the one whose name I cherish

Will chase me from her threshold.

 Again I will come back to the house of my birth,

Console myself with someone else’s joy,

And, some green evening, hang myself

On my sleeve under the window.

 The grizzled willows by the wicker fence

Will drop their heads a bit more tenderly.

They will bury me, unwashed,

To the sound of barking dogs.

 And the moon will swim on and on,

Dropping its oars into lakes...

And Russia will go on living,

Dancing and weeping by the fence.

 <1916>

* * *

 Swimming in the blue dust,

The moon butts a cloud with its horn.

This night, no one will guess

Why the herons screamed.

This night, she ran through the reeds

To the green backwater.

Her white hand swept her tousled hair

Over her tunic.

She ran up, glanced at the quick spring

And sat down on the stump in pain.

In her eyes, the daisies wilted

The way a swamp light goes out.

At dawn, through the spiraling fog,

She swam away and vanished in the distance...

And the moon, swimming in the blue dust,

Nodded to her from behind the hill.

 <1916> * * *

 Your pensive sigh is calling me

To warm light, to my native threshold

 Where grandmother and grandfather sit on the porch

Awaiting their spirited sunflower-aged grandson.

 Their grandson is slim and white as a birch,

With honey hair and velvet hands.

 Except, o my friend, I see from his blue eyes—

They’re only dreaming of his worldly life.

 The bright Virgin in the icon corner

Beams joy into their darkness.

 With a quiet smile on her thin lips

She holds their grandson in her arms.

 <1917> * * *

 Here it is, silly happiness

With white windows that look into the garden.

The sunset quietly swims

In the pond like a red swan.

 Hello, golden quiet

With your shadow of a birch in the water.

A flock of crows on the roof

Holds vespers for a star.

  Somewhere past the garden, timidly,

Out where the guelder-rose blooms,

A tender girl in white

Sings a tender song.

 In a bluish fog, the night cool

Sweeps from the field.

Silly, sweet happiness.

Fresh blush of cheeks.

 <1918>

* * *

 Country, o my country!

Autumnal rainy tin.

The shivering streetlight reflects

Its lipless head in a black puddle.

 No, it’s best not to look,

Or else I’ll see something worse.

I’ll just keep squinting my eyes

At all this rusted haze.

 It’s warmer this way and less painful.

Look: between the skeletons of houses

A bell tower, like a miller, carries

The copper bagfuls of bells.

 If you’re hungry, you will be nourished.

If you’re miserable, you’ll find joy.

Just don’t look at me too openly,

My unknown earthly brother.

 As I thought, so I did. But alas!

It’s the same every time!

Looks like my body is too used to

Feeling this shivering cold.

 Well, so what! There are many others,

I’m not the only one alive in the world!

As for the street light, one moment it blinks,

The next moment it laughs with its lipless head.

 Only my heart, under shabby clothes,

Whispers to me, who has visited solid ground:

“My friend, my friend, the eyes that have seen

Can only be shut by death.”

 <1921>

* * *

 Don’t torment me with your icy demeanor

And don’t ask me how old I am.

I’ve got a severe falling sickness;

My soul is a yellow skeleton.

 There was a time when, hailing from outskirts,

In a smoke of my boyish dreams,

I imagined riches and fame,

And being loved by all.

 Yes! I’m rich, I’m rich beyond words.

I had a top hat; now I don’t.

All I’ve got left is one shirtfront

And a worn-out pair of fashionable shoes.

 And my fame is no worse:

From Moscow to Paris

My name inspires horror

Like a loud swearword painted on a fence.

 As to love—isn’t it funny?

You kiss me, but lips feel like tin.

I know, my feeling is overripe

And yours won’t be able to bloom.

 Oh well, I’m too young to brood,

And if I’m sad—what of it?

Fresh grass that covers the hills

Rustles with more gold than your braids.

 I’d love to go back to that place

Where, listening to rustling golden grass,

I could sink forever into oblivion

In the smoke of my boyish dreams.

 But this time I’d dream of something new,

Something earth or grass can’t understand,

Something no heart can express in words

And no human being could name.

 <1923>

 * * *

 A blue May. An eventide warmth.

The ring at the gate makes no sound.

Sticky smell wafts from the sagebrush.

The cherry tree sleeps in a white gown.

 Through the wooden wings of the window,

The whimsical moon is weaving

The lace patterns of the fine curtains

And the window frames onto the floor.

 Our living room might be small,

But it’s clean. I’m here at my leisure...

This night I’m enjoying my life

Like a pleasant thought of a friend.

 The garden blazes like a frothy fire,

And the moon, straining all its powers,

Would like everyone to tremble

From the piercing word “darling.”

 In this blossoming, in this smoothness,

Hearing the merry harmonica of May,

I’m the only one who wishes for nothing,

Who accepts everything as is.

 I accept it—come and appear,

Everything that brings pain and relief...

Peace be with you, life that has rumbled by.

Peace be with you, light-blue chill.

 <1925>

Born in Moscow, Russia, Anton Yakovlev studied filmmaking and poetry at Harvard University. He is the author of poetry chapbooks The Ghost of Grant Wood (Finishing Line Press, 2015) and Neptune Court (The Operating System, 2015). His poems have appeared in The New Yorker, The Hopkins Review, Prelude, Measure, The Best of The Raintown Review, The Stockholm Review of Literature, and elsewhere. His book of translations of poetry by Sergei Esenin is forthcoming from Sensitive Skin Books in 2017. He has also directed several short films.

One of the most important Russian poets of all time, Sergei Yesenin (1895-1925) was a founding member of the short-lived but influential Imaginist movement, which stood in contrast to Futurism and was related to Imagism in English. Originally from the village of Konstantinovo, Ryazan Province, Yesenin spent most of his adult life in Petrograd (later Leningrad, now St. Petersburg), but most of his poetry continued to focus on nature and traditional rural life. In 1922 he married the American dancer Isadora Duncan, but their marriage was short-lived. Though he initially supported the Bolshevik regime, the poet became disenchanted with it, recognizing the encroaching and destructive effects of Soviet industrialization on the peasant population. According to the official account, on the night of December 27, 1925, he hanged himself after writing his final poem in his own blood, though many experts, relatives, and friends of the poet have disputed the official narrative.

[inke-ri]

Okay so that post I promised: I was rewatching HTTYD 2. I watched the first one right after seeing Dragons 3, but somehow I'm struggling with finishing the second movie. It has its flaws, but it's overall still a great dragons movie. But I just get so... Emotional about it. Especially about Toothless. Have you seen how protective and caring he is about Hiccup? I feel like they added so many scenes and little moments to make it very clear (and very impactful) that Toothless would NEVER actively harm Hiccup as he tried to do under the Bewilderbeast's command. Their flight where no one goes. His joy at flying with Hiccup, and his annoyance when his silly human friend puts them in danger and jokes about it like he just doesn't care. His teasing at Hiccup- not as a dog or pet but like an equal friend. The way he plays with him and licks him and overall shows how much he cares. The way he follows Hiccup around even when his focus is on his dad and whatever Drago is doing when they go back to Berk. His clear worry -for- Hiccup's worry, the fact that he can pick up on Hiccup's distress when his father tells him to stay in Berk. The way he acts on Eret's ship, like he's confused but he trusts Hiccup even in a ship full of people pointing weapons at him (remember HTTYD 1 where he would't stand even a little knife?) When Hiccup reaches to the saddle to adjust the tailfin with that "I can show it to you", he automatically moves his head away as if he can sense exactly what his best friend plans on doing and allows him to reach the saddle mechanism. The way Toothless *immediately* goes on defensive mode when Hiccup is taken by Hookfang, struggling to climb the ship's mast to maybe shoot at whatever took him? He's again so tuned to Hiccup's emotions (and Hiccup to his, I'm just focusing on Toothless here because I'm thinking about HTTYD 3) that he's seen worrying about Hiccup when he screams in frustration. HIS REACTION WHEN HICCUP IS TAKEN AWAY AND HE FALLS ON THE ICY OCEAN. Just like Hiccup, his fear isn't for himself as much as the fact that Hiccup was captured by strange dragons, you can see the pain and fear in his face, the way his call turns mournful instead of a roar. The way he licks Hiccup when he's brought to him at the King's Nest, to reassure Hiccup as well we himself, like he's only truly out of danger there, when Hiccup is with him. The way his priority is Hiccup, the way he curls around defensively around him and is very much Aggressive until Valka does that thing that makes him fall down to the ground. The playing and pulling hiccup into his back and nuzzling him after Hiccup talks about the peg leg. The little things too, like how he helps Hiccup climb the rocks and regardless of how excited he is to meet the new dragons and Cloudjumper he still runs back to Hiccup because Hiccup needs to share in his excitement. How when Hiccup and Valka are discussing the maps he starts drawing too because it's Hiccup and it's kind of a bonding thing between them. The way he's so accustomed to Hiccup's antics and the look he shoots Cloudjumper when Hiccup uses the flight suit again. His first reaction to finding out about his own hidden ability with the dorsal fins is to show it to HICCUP. When Hiccup gets shushed by his dad Toothless again gets immediately aggressive until he sees that it's Stoick, and again makes a point to be practically joined to Hiccup at the hip... Or the saddle/taifin, when he chases after his father. I stopped watching right after Stoick met Valka because like I said, I'm struggling to finish this movie. It's just SO OBVIOUS HOW MUCH TOOTHLESS LOVES HICCUP. And in HTTYD 3 we get... Some pet-voice jokes. Toothless growling at Stormfly while playing with Hiccup's leg as if he's a dog. The ONLY time we see Toothless act like TOOTHLESS around Hiccup is when he hesitates before flying away on his own. They don't even get a few good moments between the start of the movie and the meeting with the Light Fury! Toothless just doesn't CARE. I'm sorry but they made not a single moment showing Toothless' love for Hiccup except the hesitation to fly away scene. And it's so JARRING, to see that after rewatching Dragons 1 and Dragons 2. It's clear that the bond between Toothless and Hiccup is one that goes both ways. Especially when you factor in Gift of the Night Fury, which is directly referenced by the movie and thus canon. TOOTHLESS LOVES HICCUP SO MUCH. Why can't we see Toothless loving Hiccup the way he always so clearly did? It's not even *Toothless* who saves Hiccup this time. I like that scene and I love Hiccup's selfless sacrifice but it bothers me so much that it was the Light Fury who saved him. Toothless doesn't care. I know this wasn't the creators' intention but the way HTTYD Hidden World portrays Toothless... He doesn't care. He's often annoyed and frustrated at Hiccup. Even when Hiccup tries to wingman for Toothless, one of the few moments they spend together in this movie, he eventually just gets frustrated and turns his back on him. Always always always after meeting the Light Fury, except for the finale and the Reverse Hand Touch, Hiccup is on the background of whatever scene Toothless has that features his girlfriend. Even down to the first poster, it was Toothless and Light Fury staring at each other with Hiccup plastered halfheartedly on the background. Seriously. Back to HTTYD 2. They showed Toothless' love for Hiccup so clearly and without so much fuss?? Why couldn't they be bothered to make it so here? Toothless feels completely stiff and like a whole different character in this movie and it makes my heart hurt, really hurt, because Toothless' and Hiccup's friendship was the one thing I loved more than any other in the world, in any animated movie, and now when I'm watching HTTYD 2 I just wanna -cry- because I know that less than a year from then Toothless will barely even care for Hiccup. I know. I know. It's not what the movie intended. I CAN SEE THEIR INTENTIONS. I know it's about Duty and Selfless Love and Sacrifice and a Friendship that isn't bound by time or distance. I KNOW THAT. But y'know what? It isn't the feeling I got from it. I've been trying to fight myself on this but the truth is, I just can't see Toothless loving Hiccup as much as Hiccup loves him in this movie, and it hurts me so much. ... I kept asking myself why, why would it change like that? It's not like they didn't know how to portray Hiccup's and Toothless' dynamic. And the answer is right here, in those Entertainment questions. I cannot fathom how they went from "this wasn't a vicious beast, but [someone] whose soul reflected my own" and "I looked at him and saw myself" to... Talking about the dragons as if they are just pets. I always got the feeling HTTYD 1 called the dragons "pets" in the ending as an ironic callback to "pests" in the beginning of the movie... I didn't know that was the real thought process behind them. They fully expect us to bank on the previous' movies when they made this one when it comes to Toothless, because they made no effort to storyboard proper scenes between that dragon and his boy. From an objective point of view, taking just this movie into account... Toothless just really doesn't care as much as Hiccup does. Not until the very final scenes.

[holy-hyuck]

Babysitter for Two

When you ask your boyfriend’s help in helping you take care of your cousin, you don’t expect to have to take care of him too.

Pairing: Hwang Hyunjin x Reader

Word Count: 2.6k

Genre: Fluff

Warnings: None

You struggled to keep everything in your hands as you searched for the ringing phone in one of your pockets, eventually setting the bowl of food and your drink down on a table.

"Yes?" you said into the speaker once you fished the device out.

"(Y/n), could you do me a huge favour?" Your uncle's voice rang on the other side. "I have to interview someone in an hour and Lu's nanny bailed out on me. Would you be so kind and look after her whilst I'm gone?"

Your face lit up at the mention of your little cousin.

"Of course," you replied. "Just let me eat something and I'll be on my way."

"Thank you so much. You're an angel."

"I know," you joked, hanging up as you grabbed your food yet again and ate it in a rush, not wanting to make your uncle wait too long.

You slipped on your shoes and locked the house. On your way to your uncle's house, which was only twenty minutes away, you dialled Hyunjin's number. You saw each other just the other day but you knew you'd eventually get bored looking after a toddler that would sleep most of the time.

You explained the situation and asked if he wanted to spend the day with you. Remembering your uncle also had a dog, he immediately agreed, saying he will leave the dorms soon.

You walked at a fast pace, saving yourself five minutes of walking when you finally arrived at your destination. Your uncle barely had time to hug you in gratitude as he ran to his car, explaining quickly everything you needed to know - though you were no stranger to looking after Lu, so you knew most of these things anyway.

You told him goodbye, taking the baby into your hands and petting the golden retriever that ran to your feet. Then, you put on some music, knowing your cousin loved when you played it.

When Hyunjin was near your house, he asked you to stand in front of it because he didn't want to knock on a stranger's door, so you took Lu into your arms and waited for your boyfriend outside.

He came up to you with a smile on his face, giving you a sweet kiss on the cheek. All he was wearing was a white t-shirt with a hoodie over it but he still managed to blow you away. He took Lu's finger in his and cooed over how cute she looked.

Eventually, you made your way inside the house, and just when you were about to talk to Hyunjin, he spotted your uncle's dog and immediately dropped to his knees, extending out his hands.

The animal licked his palms, then lay on its back as Hyunjin started petting him and you were left with the baby in your hands, watching your boyfriend act like a baby himself.

Still amused, you wandered around the kitchen, trying to find some baby food. Once you have, you put Lu in her chair and started feeding her, the whole process going rather smoothly. Hyunjin paid no attention to either one of you, consumed with the animal, which didn't even surprise you.

Feeding Lu made a downright mess in the living room, which was expected. Still, you hated having to clean up after her. Whilst being the only actual downside to looking after her (because even calming her down when she was crying proved no real difficulties), it single-handedly made you dread her feeding time.

Nevertheless, you couldn't help but smile when she flashed you her nearly-toothless grin. After all the fiasco, as per usual, she became sleepy, but putting her to sleep usually took some time despite that fact. With the TV playing in the background and Hyunjin sprawled out on the couch with your uncle's dog, it took more time than usual for Lu to fall into slumber.

"Ugh," you groaned, trying to lull the baby. "Can't you, I don't know, call Woojin or something?"

Hyunjin's face contorted in confusion. "Why?"

"To sing Lu to sleep," you replied as if it was an obvious answer. "Unless..." You looked at him expectantly.

"No, na-ah. I can rap her to sleep if you want to..?"

You rolled your eyes lightly. "No thanks." You sighed, placing the baby in Hyunjin's arms as you rummaged through a box for a small toy Lu loved. You finally fished out the stuffed giraffe, turning around in triumph only to find the child peacefully snoring in your boyfriend's arms.

"What?" you muttered under your breath. "Was it really that easy?"

Though looking back on it, Hyunjin's face had just something about it that put even you at peace; it wasn't that surprising the baby fell asleep in his arms.

Sometimes all you really needed when you were particularly stressed out - whether that'd be from school, family, or life in general - was Hyunjin. Just looking at him could bring you back to the norm. It sounded silly when you thought about it like that, but he really was your anchor; he kept you grounded and proved to be a blessing on more than one occasion. You couldn't have asked for a better person to be in your life.

You felt a blush rising on your cheeks as you thought of this, shaking your head to bring yourself back into reality.

"I'll take it from here. Thanks," you said, somewhat awkwardly, as you took Lu from his arms and put her in her crib, located in her room on the upper floor.

Away from Hyunjin for a minute, you fanned your face with your hand, feeling stupid and embarrassed at the same time. You didn't want Hyunjin to question your blushing face, and eventually finding out he was the reason for it.

Looking in the mirror, once you made sure your face was back to its original colour, you made your way to where your boyfriend was, back to playing with the dog.

Despite rolling your eyes at the scene, your heart warmed at the sight, and you were quick to join them, picking up a remote on the way and throwing yourself onto the couch. You switched on the first best thing, just looking for a distraction because there was nothing you really wanted to do, besides maybe cuddling with Hyunjin, but you didn't want to ask.

He was still somewhat shy with you (and let's be honest, you were, too) and in reality, you were just really bored, leaving the house not being an option.

You tried not to look at the clock but every five minutes your gaze fell upon the slow-moving arrows and you fought the urge to groan and throw something at it. You were hoping it was broken, but the time displayed on your phone was the same.

It's been an hour and no more than a few sentences were exchanged between you and Hyunjin. You weren't tired but you'd gladly go to bed if that meant killing time. With Lu asleep, Hyunjin scrolling through his phone and the dog asleep next to the two of you, there was not a thing for you to do.

You had resulted in scrolling through your phone as well, except there was nothing interesting in it. The TV played a bird documentary, which wasn't even that boring, but nowhere nearly as fascinating as all the things you had in mind.

You weren't sure why Hyunjin wasn't initiating a conversation but clearly, the mood wasn't there, and when you glanced at his phone, you saw him texting Seungmin about schoolwork, and knew you were out of that topic. The two of you attended different schools, having met through mutual friends.

Just when you were about to snap and ask for him to pay attention to you (since that's mainly why you invited him - to spend time with you), you heard Lu's soft cries and you rushed upstairs, going to see what was wrong.

Since she needed a changing, that's what you did, pondering over what to do now. It would still be at least another three hours before your uncle came back and you had absolutely no intention of going back to that bird documentary.

Finally making up your mind, you dressed Lu up in some warmer clothing, taking her toy and bringing out a pushchair, deciding that Hyunjin had no other choice but to go outside with you. You took some snacks and put the dog on a leash, all ready to go, whilst Hyunjin took the hint (and all the vague cues you shouted at him as you were rushing around the living room) and put on his shoes.

Perhaps because of the weather outside, but you felt a change in the mood and the way to the park was spent conversing, any moment of silence muffled by the light breeze and rustling of leaves. Once you got there, you saw that it was filled with parents with children, maybe a dog or two, but it was a lot less occupied than it would normally be, providing for a nice atmosphere.

Now the only thing you needed was for someone to make it awkward, because why not.

"Hey Hyunjin, (y/n)!" a classmate of yours exclaimed as she ran up to the both of you, giving the dog a friendly pat on the head on the way. "Hello, lovely," she (as has everyone else) cooed at the toddler in the pushchair.

Hyunjin gave her a wave and you just smiled at her, waiting for the short talk to start soon so it could finish sooner, and you could continue with your stroll.

"Oh my goodness, she's absolutely adorable. Is she yours?"

The question caught you off guard, no doubt. You were still a teen after all, which, as your classmate, she knew.

"Umm..."

"Of course not, silly me!" You assumed her use of language was because of the baby since her voice naturally wasn't as sweet or high-pitched. "I bet you would make cute babies. And you'd be a great parent!" she told you, petted the dog, then disappeared as if nothing happened.

Hyunjin scratched the back of his head as you tried to look anywhere but at him, but you could see the smile forming on his face from the corner of your eyes.

"Hyunjin!" you reprimanded him, slapping his arm but that just made him release the laugh he'd been holding.

Although you tried to refrain from it, you couldn't help but laugh too, trudging further along the path to move away from your boyfriend and not let him know.

Time flew by and you didn't even notice, too busy enjoying yourself. Who would have thought you could have fun taking care of a child.

Sitting on a bench, the pushchair next to you, you took out a notebook and started scribbling down. Every once in a while, you took a look at Lu, but she was deep in her slumber, the laughter of children around you a sweet lullaby. Hyunjin was playing with the dog somewhere in the distance, on a hill not too far away from where you were, but his figure was still a blur. You could only hear his giggles every few seconds, signifying that he was having fun.

You shook your head as you watched Hyunjin roll down the grassy hill, laughing his head off when he finally came to a halt, and went back to writing in your notebook, wondering who was the child in this trio.

Lost in the words you were putting down on the page, you were brought back to reality with a hissing sound coming out of your boyfriend's mouth as he limped over to where you were, the dog's head already on your lap, waiting for you to pet him.

As you did so, you furrowed your eyebrows, your eyes travelling up and down Hyunjin's form to find the cause of the grimace adorning his features, and they finally landed on the hole in his jeans, blood staining the edges of the ripped denim.

You refrained yourself from sighing in exasperation at the sight of your boyfriend, instead opting for closing your notebook and putting it away.

"What did you do now?" you asked, although you already figured it out.

"Ah, nothing," he said, wincing slightly as his hand ran over the wound.

You slapped his hand away. "Don't touch it!" you reprimanded him, sighing. "Let's just go home now and treat it."

On the way home, you noticed Hyunjin wasn't concentrated on where he was going, even though his face was facing the ground. On multiple occasions, he swerved off the sidewalk and you had to grab his sleeve to pull him back so that he wouldn't walk onto the street.

He was also paler than he was this morning, so when you came back home and he complained of a sore throat, you knew the reason.

Passing him a thermometer, you went to the kitchen to make him some tea. You soaked a towel in water and went back to Hyunjin, dabbing the scratch on his leg until the blood came off, then dried it and applied a plaster onto the skin.

Taking the thermometer from him, you grimaced as you looked at the reading. "No fever, but you're really close. I'm making you tea; just lie down for now and tell me if you need anything."

From a cupboard, you took out lozenges, as well as some strawberries for Lu, and gave them to the pair in the living room. Hyunjin looked worse than he had just a minute ago, in whichever way that was possible, perhaps because now he was sprawled across the couch, hugging the blanket for dear life, and you and him both knew there was no way he'd find the strength to get up again.

You made him as comfortable as possible, running back and forth between him and Lu to somehow take care of both of them.

You heard glass shattering and looked at Hyunjin groaning at the cup of steaming tea he just spilled, breaking the glass in the process as it fell off the table. You couldn't be mad at him even if you tried, so you cleaned everything up, his apologies passing through your head, and made him another cup of the beverage.

His muscles ached, the headache and hot flushes he was experiencing making him forget about the scratch on his leg, which seemed insignificant in comparison. Hyunjin curled up into a ball, dreading having to leave in the evening because obviously, he couldn't stay at your uncle's house forever, but his drooping eyelids argued with that thought.

Receiving a call from your uncle, you went to the hallway to answer it. All he said was that he would be home soon, and when you told him about Hyunjin's sickness, he offered to drop him off. You thanked him, relief flooding through you.

You walked into the living room to find Hyunjin fast asleep, his breathing shallow, the dog cuddled up next to him and Lu dozing off at the other end of the couch. A smile graced your face and, as tired as it was, it was full of happiness too.

You sat down, not fully realising how exhausted you were until your back pressed against the cushions, thanking for the relief, and a satisfying feeling spread through your muscles. Soon, unable to help your own eyelids from closing, you joined the other three.

[hauntedatmidnight]

Misunderstanding

Summary: He was Tom's best friend from school. She was Tom's new best friend from work. They had to make it work... Right? 

 Warnings: smut 

 Word count: almost 5k

 Harrison Osterfield x reader (y/n) 

 Hey, guys! This is the first imagine I'm putting up here. There's a probability of you finding mistakes, since I finished this at 3am. English is also not my native language (I'm brazilian), so I'm sorry if there's something wrong. Hope you enjoy it!

Y/n met Thomas at work. For whatever reason, they instantly bonded and, just like that, she had a best friend. She was new in town, right out of college and this was the opportunity of a lifetime. Those things didn’t happen where she came from, especially that young. Being away from family, friends, everything she knew… Well, it scared her.

That’s why her friendship with Tom meant so much to her; having him around was comforting. He took her sightseeing in her new town, helped her find and apartment – they were next door neighbors now! – and constantly kept her company. The only problem in this dynamic, was that anywhere Tom went, so did Harrison. They were like a package and even though y/n would like to separate them sometimes, it felt impossible. She even said they were symbiotic, but Tom just shrugged and said he had no idea what symbiotic meant.

So, y/n would put up with the sarcastic little comentary Harrison would throw at her about everything, swallowed hard his tasteless jokes and was her most polite self with the boy, even though he didn’t make it easier. He wasn’t even rude or anything with her, they just didn’t click, you know? She tried so hard for Tom. But the tall, blond, blue eyed boy just didn’t connect with her the same way Thomas did.

It was saturday, meaning Thomas was lying on her couch, complaining about a head ache and zapping through channels in her tv, while she cooked lunch. For three, she didn’t ask anymore. She knew Harrison was on his way, he always was.

“Hey, Tom” she called from the kitchen, while stirring the sauce. “Have you ever asked yourself why am I the one who always cooks on Saturday?”

“Because I’m fucking hungover” he mumbled, giving up on finding something to watch and jigging to the kitchen. “And I make breakfast every morning too”

“What if I wanted to get hungover? You know, got out and stuff…” she asked, handing him a glass of water and an aspirin, while he sat on the counter.

“If you really want to go out, there’s a party at Jacob’s tonight” he told her, with a smirk.

“Are you going?” she asked, setting the table.

“No, I’m flying home tonight, remember?”

“Oh, right! Jesus, Thomas, how am I going to survive 15 days without you?” she made a dramatic gesture and a pout that made him laugh.

“I could always recommend calling Haz, but you two seem to have trouble with one another” he shrugged, thinking. “You’re so cool and my best friend and he’s so cool and my best friend. Why can’t you get along?”

“I don’t exactly dislike him, Tom” she defended herself, bringing pasta and sauce to the table. “But speaking of him… He’s late”

 “Late for what? It’s saturday, y/n”

“Well, back home...”

“This is home now, sweetheart” he smiled and pinched her right cheek. They heard the bell ring and Tom ran to open the door. “What’s up, Haz? Lunch’s ready and y/n’s already complaining”

“Thomas!” she yelled from the kitchen, feeling her cheeks burn with embarrassment. Did he need to do that?

“Sorry, y/n” Harrison groaned, falling in a chair without even looking at her.

“That’s alright” she mumbled back, but she couldn’t tell if he actually listened to her. He was already eating and talking to Tom. And that’s why they didn’t get along. He never really paid attention to her, he never really tried. She always felt out of that equation, when Thomas was with him. She sighed, thinking to herself that maybe she was just jealous. Or maybe he was jealous of her.

“Tom said you want to go out today” it took her a while to realize Harrison was talking to her and Tom was already back at her couch. “There’s Jacob’s party, if you want to”

“Right” she muttered, giving him a small, toothless smile. “You going?”

“Sure” he smiled back at her in what seemed like the first time they held conversation without Tom. “If you want to come with me I can give you a ride”

“It’s ok, Haz… I really…”

“Need to get out of your room” Thomas interrupted her, going for the fridge. “Where’s the beer?”

“This is not your fridge, Tom. And really? I need to get out of my room?” she frowned, looking at his back, who was still looking through her fridge.

“Come on, y/n” he turned back to her, closing the fridge’s door. “Go out. Dance, drink, you know… Stuff”

“Stuff” she repeated, getting up and following him to the living room.

“Yeah” he laughed at her mad face, turning the tv on again. “You know, have fun! Oh, Batman!” he yelped, before turning back to y/n. “What are you afraid of?”

“I’m not afraid” she said, knowing he was just trying to get to her and it was working. He was teasing her. And she was taking the bait. “Haz, what time should I be ready?”

“Nine?” he offered, feeling unsure about the whole thing. He was getting into one of y/n and Tom’s little fights. That never went well.

“Great! 9pm, Thomas. You get on your plane to see family and I go to a party. Are we good?”

Hours later, she really regretted taking Thomas’ bait. She loved Jacob and had no problem going to parties at all. But Jacob had guests to talk to and she didn’t know anyone at that party besides Harrison. And he was gone the second they got there.

She was walking around Jacob’s house, beer on her hand, dragging her boot’s heels and searching for some blonde hair. Maybe he doesn’t want me to find him, she thought.

“Hey, I’m Mike” she heard someone saying behind her and, turning back, found a cute brunette with the brightest smile she ever saw. Before she could answer him, though, she felt a warm hand on her right shoulder.

“She’s with me” Harrison’s voice informed Mike. The man apologized and left.

“Oh, now you show up?” she asked, turning to look Harrison in the eye. “What if I wanted to get to know him?”

“Believe me, you don’t” he nudged her shoulder with his own, dragging her to the balcony with him, where some people were playing beer pong.

“Who said that? You’re some y/n specialist now? Do you even know anything about me besides my address? And I can’t exactly give that to you, because you obviously know that only ‘cause it’s the same as Tom’s” she rambled, feeling annoyed at his manners. Maybe it was the alcohol or maybe she was just upset to be left alone. She crossed her arms and looked at him, mouth closed in a line.

“Slow down, y/n” he asked, rolling his pretty blue eyes at her. “I know we’re not best friends, but Tom talks about you all the time. So yeah, I know a few things. I even know your old dog Polly limps her right leg” he sighed, putting a hand back in her shoulder. “And you wouldn’t want to get to know Mike ‘cause he’s a dick. I got you out of a night of bad sex and a lot of head ache the next day”

“Thanks” she whispered, avoiding his gaze.

“Do you wanna play beer pong?” he invited her, pointing at a ping pong table. “I promise you I’m gonna be nice. If you can win, I mean…”

“What if I lose?” she asked, already walking to the table.

“You make breakfast every day until Tom comes back”

“Done!”  she shouted, laughing and arranging the red cups while Harrison gave a smirk and left to get beers in the kitchen.

He came back with Jacob and Zendaya, a friend of Harrison and Tom y/n haven’t met yet. Zendaya was really excited about the whole thing, because she wanted Harrison to get his ass kicked for once. Y/n smiled at that and sang girl power to the pretty girl she just met. Well, maybe Tom was right and she really needed to get out more.

“Ok, you’re good” Harrison admitted. Y/n had a lot more cups on her side of the table.

“I told you. You don’t know me” she smiled at him, waiting for his next move. He got the ball in one of her cups.

“Drink” his commanding voice sent shivers down her spine and his blue eyes met hers. She gave him an annoyed look and didn’t move. “Do you need help, y/n?” he laughed, walking to her side and picking her cup up. “Let me help you” and, saying that, spilled it all in her mouth, making her drink all the beer, eventually spitting a bit at him. He was still laughing, an arm lazily around her, his scent intoxicating her.

“God, you’re an asshole!” she cussed, untangling herself from his arms and tossing the ball in one of his cups “But see, love, there’s three here and just one over there. Be nice”

After a couple of fails from both parts, she finally won. Victory dance and everything, while Harrison just watched her with a silly smile.

“Unbelievable” Jacob whispered, coming back from inside the house just in time. “He never loses”

“Shut it” Zendaya whispered back, pointing with her head to Harrison and y/n, laughing at each other, eyes never leaving one another, y/n hopping from her side of the table to Harrison’s, getting his last cup and trying to spill it in his mouth, like he did to her. Jacob left out a low laugh at that, knowing full well where this was going.

“Drink it, Haz. Come on” y/n teased him, getting on the tip of her toes, trying to get the taller boy to drink. She was all over him, laughing, his hands were on her hips and when he suddenly turned around, fleeing from her, she lost her balance. Her back hit a pillar, but it seemed like nothing and she kept laughing. “You can’t cheat, Harrison! Drink!” she protested, while he got closer and closer.

“Make me” he whispered against her lips, getting even closer, until their bodies were almost glued together. They laughed, before his lips were on hers and her hands were in his hair.

And it was intense. Jacob and Zendaya hurried out of the balcony, while Harrison positioned himself between y/n’s legs and his tongue made its way to her mouth. She didn’t offer any resistance and it just made sense to her, in a way she could never understand. Right there; they clicked. Her hands moving from his hair to his muscular back and toned arms, him biting on her lower lip while she tried to muffle out a moan.

The elevator doors on y/n’s building opened up and the couple got out, lips still attached to each other. She smiled, breaking the kiss and turned around, looking for her keys, while his arms were still around her and his lips moved to her neck. She groaned at that, trying to think, but Harrison made it really hard.

“Haz...” she whispered, but got nothing in return. “Haz, I forgot my jacket at Jacob’s. My keys were in there” he snorted against her neck.

“Good thing I’ve got keys, then”  he took her by her hand, smiling at the confused look she gave him and pulled her until they were in front of Tom’s door.

“What? Here?” he pushed her inside Thomas apartment, ignoring her questions. She’s been there, of course. Every day, actually. But it felt weird to be there with Harrison.

“He wouldn’t mind” he said, pulling her back against his body. “And he doesn’t need to know, too” and, saying that, he lifted her by her waist, dragging her to Thomas’ huge couch.

She woke up, sunday morning, feeling her whole body ache. She wasn’t hungover exactly, but she felt… Sore. And then it hit her. His lips all over her body, his fingertips adding pressure at all the right places, moaning his name countless times… Oh, she felt so embarrassed by that. Especially being naked in her best friend’s bed. Of course Thomas would just high five her and brag about being right. And it would be an awkward moment, because Harrison… Wait. Where was he? She turned around and found nothing.

Y/n got up, got dressed and slowly walked through Thomas’ apartment. Empty. She rolled her eyes. Of fucking course he left her alone. He promised to be nice for one night, not forever. Asshole.

So, she called the manager, got her spare key and sunk into her couch, feeling numb. After a while, she fell back asleep, too tired to think about Harrison or last night at all.

“So, I heard you had fun” Tom sang into her ear, the morning he got back, while she made pancakes.

"Who told you that?” she flinched, just thinking about that night. She didn’t see Harrison again until Tom came back and, you know, they are attached to the hip.

"Jacob and Zendaya”

"Oh” was all she could produce out of that. He knew, then.

"What happened?” he asked, giving her time to think about an answer, while Harrison was sprawled on her couch.

"The usual” she said, putting more pancake mix into the pan.

"The usual?” Tom asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Harrison being Harrison” she smiled weakly at her best friend, moving the stack of pancakes to the table.

"I’m gonna need more if you want my advice” Tom smirked at y/n, grabbing some pancakes and joining Harrison on the couch.

"But I don’t want it” she rolled her eyes at Tom, suddenly feeling like an outcast in her own living room. She sat on the floor, against Tom’s legs and avoiding Haz’s eyes like the plague.

"Ok, I don’t care as long as you party with me this time” he nudged her with his foot, making her laugh.

"Jealous, much?” she heard Harrison muttering, but still avoided his gaze.

It was Saturday. Y/n found herself at Zendaya’s, making her actually happy that she made a new friend. She was proud of herself, even. A girlfriend. Someone she could ask advice about makeup and clothes and not get the usual shrug Thomas always gave her. They were eating pad thai and watching The Bachelor before going out. Y/n was happy. A new friend, going out to parties, cold beer, music and… Oh, Harrison.

The knock on the door was their cue to leave. Tom was there to pick them up and, of course, Harrison tagged along. The drive to Tony’s house was silent, broken from time to time by Zendaya singing out loud, asking everyone questions and trying to break the ice. Poor thing.

"We’re here” Tom sang, hopping out of the car.

“Can you never drive again?” Zendaya asked.

"That’s why Harrison’s always the one to drive. I get it now” y/n teased Tom, getting out of the car and nudging him with her elbow, playfully.

"Oh, shut it” he rolled his eyes. “Go ahead, Z and Haz. We’ll meet you inside”

They agreed and left y/n and Tom alone, she raised her eyebrows at her best friend and crossed her arms in front of her body, suddenly feeling very self-aware. She was kinda sweating in her butt from the nerves and she felt the leather skirt sticking against her legs, the long sleeved black and glittery body also making her sweat. She didn’t know if she was nervous or just hot. She knew Tom. She knew what was coming.

"Ok, what happened?” he asked, leaning against the car.

"He left me. Alone” she rolled her eyes, also leaning against the car, but avoiding Thomas’ gaze.

"Really? Not what he said”

"Well, he’s an asshole” she rolled her eyes one more time and left Tom behind.

Y/n found the alcohol before she found Tony to say hi. Of course she was looking for the beverage and not Tom’s friend she met a couple of times before. She needed to drink or she wouldn’t survive this.

"Hello, beer pong master” y/n turned around to find Tony.

"Oh, so you heard the songs they sing about me and my heroic feats” she smiled, hugging the boy. “Thank you for inviting me over, Tony”

"What? It’s nothing” he winked at her, helping y/n open a beer. “Also, heard in those songs that you might want to talk to some guy we know…”

"Harrison” she didn’t even blink saying his name. What was it with everyone bringing him up?

"Yeah. Up for a beer pong game?” she was glad he changed the subject, but not so glad to find Harrison playing when they got to the back yard.

 A few rounds later, Tony was pretty drunk. Tom had his arms around her, singing in a slurred voice, missing the lyrics and making her laugh. Zendaya was playing against Harrison and y/n kept her eyes on the table, watching the ball kick back and forth.

"What?” Z shouted, throwing the ball back at Harrison. “You won again? Seriously y/n, please come kick his ass again!”

"Yeah, let’s see the legend in action!” Tony chanted, encouraging her.

"Come on, y/n!” Tom also pressured her, releasing her from his embrace and pushing her to the table. She finally glanced at Harrison and his blue eyes met hers. For a while that’s all they did whilst their friends incited them. Then Harrison offered her a small smile and in her near drunk state she smiled back.

"What do I get from this?” y/n asked Harrison, positioning herself at the other side of the table.

"Oh, you already know” he winked at her, gaining some confidence over her teasing. “I’ll be nice”

"You’ll have to be nicer than last time” she arranged the cups in front of her and filled them with cold beer.

"Nicer? From what I remember I was so nice you…” he suddenly realized everyone could listen to them and coughed. “We’ll see about that”

But Harrison got competitive. Each time y/n won he swore he knew what he was doing wrong and challenged her for one more time. Everyone was having fun from their banter, so they kept going. Until Harrison was… Drunk. He felt drunk enough to tease her and intice her with inuendos and... She cut him off.

"Ok, that’s enough” she said, sharply, but still smiling. “You’re drunk enough, Haz”

"I lost” he protested, leaning against the table. “I’m drinking”

"You said you’d be nice, not drunk as fuck”

"Oh, you curse now” he laughed, while Tom came to the rescue, hiding the rest of the cups so Harrison couldn’t drink more.

“I do” she drank from her cup, raising an eyebrow at him.

“You’re a lot more fun than it seems”

“I know” she gave him a low chuckle and helped him to the balcony’s couch, not noticing they were left alone by everyone else. “I came here to work. I’m starting my career and I would love not to ruin everything like I did back home”

“What are you running from?” he asked, sinking onto the couch.

"Not running away, Haz. Just starting over” she explained, smiling. “I promised myself I would be a different person. Different from the girl who almost set her dorm on fire on third year, from the girl who broke her high school boyfriend’s heart over the captain of the football team. And then his heart over someone else. But especially, from the girl who partied and drank all through college, before gaining some conscience in the last year”

"I thought you were a goody” he laughed, turning his head to look at her. “But you kinda owe me the full story on that fire accident thing”

"Valentine’s day bonfire gone wrong. Believe me, I had a lot to burn” she laughed and he did the same thing. And it felt easy. Her stomach was on loops inside of her and her heart… Oh, her heart was so confused. “But what about you? What do you hide?”

"Well… I’m better than this” he pointed at himself.

"You’re… Drunk?” she frowned, confused.

“Maybe” he laughed and then after a while, sighed, turning away from her. “Out of nowhere Tom had a new best friend and we shared everything that was ours with her. I wasn’t exactly a good friend. To Tom. To you”

“I mean, you did get rid of that Mike guy for me” she considered, nudging him with her shoulder.

“Do you wanna dance?”

And for the rest of the night they had fun. Dancing to any song Tony blasted on the speakers – the ones they knew, the ones they didn’t and Harrison didn’t leave the dance floor even when Ariana Grande was on, because y/n squeaked at the sound of Side to Side and he couldn’t stop looking at that. They stole chips from Tony’s kitchen, pranked Tom together and laughed at each other’s jokes. It was pretty late when y/n threw herself on Tony’s couch and Harrison followed her, putting her feet in his lap.

“I can’t believe Ms. Party Girl’s tired” he played with her heels, laughing a bit.

“It’s been a while, so I’m kinda new at this again? I lasted, considering” she offered as a defense, playing with his hair without noticing.

“I’m sorry” he was suddenly sort of dark and not looking at her. Y/n sat straight, holding his hand in hers.

“Yeah? What for?”

“I should have given you a chance, since the beginning, y/n” he glanced at her, breathing uneven, as if it was hard to talk about it. “You’re nice. I like you. But I don’t know what to make out of it since last time”

“What do you mean?” she felt a knot in her stomach. What was he trying to say?

“I mean, it was weird and disappointing coming back and… Nothing. I thought about knocking at your place, but it also felt useless” he squeezed her hand. “But guess that’s on me. My fault”

“What are you talking about? You left me alone!”

“I was only grabbing you some coffee, you dickhead. Even texted Tom to learn what you usually ate in the morning. I was trying to be nice”

And she kissed him. Just like that. Grabbed his face with both her hands, didn’t give him time to understand what was happening or she might lose the courage. And she kissed him. And, again, it made sense. It felt right. As if all the universe wanted when it jogged her to the other side of the country, was for them to find each other. And so she smiled against his lips and he smiled back and whispered “let’s get out of here”.

This time she had her keys. They weren’t drunk, but kind of dizzy and it made them giggle every time they hit something while trying to find her room in the dark. Harrison’s lips were attached to her collar bone and she knew it would leave a mark and she didn’t care. At all.

Finally, her knees hit her mattress and she fell on her bed, Harrison hurrying to be on top of her.

"Bold move on the cab, sweetheart” he whispered in her ear, a hand finding her tight underneath her skirt and the other supporting his weight, settled alongside her head.

"God, who am I? What have you made of me, Harrison Osterfield?” she laughed against his lips, unbuttoning his shirt.

"I don’t know, but I’m glad I did” he bit her earlobe, earning a low moan from her. “I want more of that, love”

"Work harder, then” she teased, finally getting rid of his shirt.

"Oh? Really?” he looked at her with dark eyes and, without a warning; two of his fingers were inside of her. She moaned loud, nails clutching to his back. “God, you’re so wet already”

"Bold move on the cab, sweetheart” she teased him with his own words and he laughed, fingers still inside her, moving at a slow pace. Harrison kissed her, his tongue exploring her mouth and biting on her lower lip every now and then. His thumb found her clit and she moaned again, against his lips, making him shiver on top of her.

Y/n then pushed him to lie on his back and got on top of him herself. With his blue eyes glued to her, she unzipped her skirt and tossed it away. His hands flew to y/n’s ass, making her grind against him. He helped her take off the long sleeved body and sat up, his lips quickly finding her left nipple. Y/n used her hands in his hair to steady herself, while grinding against him.

Harrison turned them around again, and y/n felt her back against the mattress. He kissed her lips, her jawline, her neck, her collar bone and then her breasts, her belly, until he found her panties. He played with the hem of her black laced panties and at the same time she felt it being pulled off, she felt his lips of her and she couldn’t restrain a loud moan of his name.

"You like this, love?” he asked, the vibration of his voice against her pussy sending shivers down her spine.

"Keep going” she pleaded, in a low voice. He didn’t answer with words, but with actions. His tongue made his way to her clit and his fingers were inside her again. He was licking and sucking and biting and his fingers were curling inside of her and y/n could stop moaning his name again, like last time. His name felt so right on her lips when she sort of whispered them between moans. So she kept on calling for him, clutching to his hair, curling her toes until she came undone. A mess of sweat, loud moans and pleasure. Harrison helped her ride her high and made his way back up by tracing her figure with his nose and lips, until he found her lips again. And he kissed her, letting her taste herself in his mouth, glowing with her wetness.

And while she was still trying to get back from this big fucking orgasm, he was already taking off his pants, putting on a condom and sliding inside her, making her moan audibly again. She laughed against his shoulder and whispered “you’ll be the death of me”, to what he smiled and kissed her again.

He was in and out of her at a delicious pace, his forehead resting against hers, blue eyes glued to y/n’s. His mouth was half open, pink and swollen from the kissing and the biting. Y/n’s nails found their home in Harrison’s back and he seemed to enjoy it. One of his hands made its way to her right tight, positioning her to a new, deeper angle, making her moan louder and call his name.

"Harrison” she cried, clutching to his back stronger.

"What, love?” he whispered, moving his mouth to her neck, leaving open mouth kisses and love bites.

"I’m almost…”

"Come for me, y/n” Harrison asked, slamming harder into her, the hand holding her tight grabbing it stronger, sure to leave a mark she wouldn’t care to carry with her. “Y/n” he called her name again and it did it for her. She clenched around him, toes curling and the knot of her abdomen dissolving into delicious waves of pleasure.

"Haz” she moaned one last time, before his trusts became sloppier and he, too, reached his climax inside her, while sucking on her neck and groaning loud against her skin.

He collapsed besides her, breathing uneven, sweating and grinning openly. She turned to face him, her hair sticking to her sweaty face and her entire body still very aware of all the pleasure the boy next to her just provided. But it was more than that, she knew.

After a while, he turned to face her too, pulling her onto him and covering them with her light sheets. Grinning at each other, they fell asleep.

And Harrison was there the next morning. And the next. And the next. Until it was the usual. Until Tom knocked on the door every morning instead of barging in, afraid to find someone naked or having morning sex in the kitchen.

Until their little misunderstanding was nothing but the story of how they got together.

[allfandomxreader]

A Morning with the Hollands

Pairings: Dad!Tom x Reader

Words: 800

Warnings: Pure fluff

Summary: With loving eyes, you realize for the millionth time that this is how you want life to be forever. To be by Tom’s side, to watch your kids grow, to cherish the small moments much like this one. 

A/N: So it’s Father’s Day and I wanted to write something fluffy with Tom and your little family. 

Masterlist

It’s not unusual to wake up by tiny fingers pushing into your cheeks. You smile before you even open your eyes to be welcomed with hushed giggles. Your daughter stands inches away from your face, her morning breath invading your senses with each quiet laugh. You know there’s no way she’s letting you fall back asleep.

“Morning sunshine,” You whisper, slowly peeling the warmth of the thick duvet away from your body, “Wanna go make breakfast for daddy?” You glance behind you to the still sleeping man. His chest rises and falls, his mouth hangs open slightly with drool trickling down his chin and onto his pillow.

Granted, it’s not the prettiest sight, but it’s your favorite. You love nothing more than waking up to your husband after nights full of laughing and talking, something you’ve promised not to let go since the birth of your two children.

Your daughter beams her nearly toothless smile, her dark hair wild as she waits for you to roll out of bed. Her tiny hand wraps around your finger, coaxing you out of comfort and into the large kitchen. “We have to be quiet, okay? Let daddy sleep in today.” She nods, curls bouncing along with her movements. “What should we make him for breakfast, my love?” You look down towards the short girl whose arms are raised over her head for you.

“Ice cream!” She cheers and claps as you pull her up by her underarms, balancing her on your hip.

“Ice cream?” You gasp, pretending to be shocked, “Ice cream isn’t a breakfast food, silly!” The kitchen fills with her loud laughter along with your own. “How about,” Your eyes gaze over the food options stored within your pantry, “Waffles!” The little girl squirms with excitement in your arms, cheering at the sound of her favorite food.

Once her hands are washed and dried, you pass her the ingredients, allowing her to pour liquids over the waffle mix. She bites onto her lip, concentrating as she attempts to stir the batter with a spatula, only to send a cloud full of mix above her head. “Can you help me, mommy?” She asks, holding the utensil towards you.

“Sure thing,” Tessa’s claws clicking against the tile grabbing the toddler’s attention away from her cooking. You set her on the floor to play with the beloved family dog before taking over the cooking entirely. You chop fruits and pour batter into the waffle maker, the aroma unknowingly stirring your husband awake.

“What’s going on in here?” Tom’s voice pours into the kitchen, tearing your attention away from food and to him.

He holds your sleepy son in his arms, his little hand rubs sleep out of his eyes before reaching for you. “You’re not supposed to be up yet, we were going to surprise you.” You laugh, craning your head for a good morning kiss.

“And miss out on all the fun? I don’t think so, darling,” He presses a soft kiss while passing the boy into your arms. You part ways for a moment, Tom in the kitchen, you at the island setting the one-year-old in his high chair.

“Daddy, daddy, daddy!” Your daughter screams, forgetting all about Tessa and bouncing for Tom’s attention.

“Good morning, princess!” He cheers, tossing her into the air. She shrieks loudly, laughing into Tom’s neck when he grabs her. Tessa goes wild at his feet, running circles and barking for her own attention. Your son points and gurgles towards his father and sister, shoving bits of strawberry into his mouth.

Mornings spent with Tom and your children are rare. Usually, Tom would’ve been rushing around the home gathering everything he needs for his shooting that day and out the door within the next half hour. You’re normally the one feeding breakfast to sleepy children and cleaning up dishes from the night prior.

Today, however, Tom bends over the sink, hands submerged in soapy water, handing plates and sippy cups to your daughter who always offers a helping hand. She pats the water droplets away with a towel too big for her hands, finally setting a still damp cup to her dry pile.

It wasn’t a normal day in the Holland household, but it was by far your favorite family moment. Loud and obnoxious as it may be, it brings you all the peace in the world. Tom being the best father you could ever imagine for your little ones, being the best husband you could ask for, your children innocent and wild just how you like them, and Tessa, panting and tail wagging as she watches her family.

With loving eyes, you realize for the millionth time that this is how you want life to be forever. To be by Tom’s side, to watch your kids grow, to cherish the small moments much like this one. This, is your forever, which is exactly what Tom promised you.

Tags: @superfrankie111 @rueinn

[despiteherself]

somewhat spoiler-y thoughts under the cut. don’t keep reading if you don’t want to see stuff about httyd3

okay. so overall i actually enjoyed httyd3 (surprising; i know). i do have lots and lots of complaints but the stuff i liked was exciting and interesting enough that i sort of just blacked out the bad stuff. and i’m going to love picking that stuff apart bc boy was there some cringy shit. especially if you don’t like hiccstrid, their scenes with actual relationship talk were awkward and wooden and god. the ending was SO :/ 

actual spoilers from here on out. you’ve been warned. 

grimmel was a lot more compelling as a villain. they sort of gave him a backstory thing and it kind of ruined it a bit for me bc it was basically “i killed a night fury as a boy and my village loved me for it so i killed all of them” but idk something about it was lacking and i was like. oh. did you guys not care enough to flesh this one out. actually, writing it down it sounds way better motivation than when he actually said it even tho it’s basically the same thing.

the deathgrippers were being controlled! grimmel was using their venom to mind control them, so any “alpha talk” didn’t get through to them and they did exactly what grimmel wanted. 

and hiccup didn’t give a shit lol. these dragons were constantly being drugged via needles in their head/neck and being forced to hunt and attack and carry grimmel around and hiccup didn’t even feel a little bit sorry for them or express any pain. the whole movie was kinda “wow ppl don’t deserve dragons we need to save them” but he didn’t express any empathy for dragons being used? not many were shown in this movie to be used, and even less that hiccup saw, but idk the whole “let the things you love go!” didn’t congeal well. 

further more, he made several terrible decisions for the entirety of berk, including running away to find the hidden world, which they had no proof even existed and absolutely kept walking exactly into everything grimmel wanted, but when ruff did it (after she was “captured” and let go she flies straight back the place they’ve settled leading grimmel back to new berk) it felt like it was being played as a WAY worse thing. like she was an idiot for doing it, and it was just! hiccup. every decision you’ve made has been panicked and blind and made your position worse and worse. 

gobber, valka and eret all get a little screen time, and they all play the naysayer stoick part? like “hiccup this is dangerous” and hiccup completely ignores them. them: hiccup we have advice hiccup: ok cool im not listening and i don’t want to hear it. they don’t even get to really explain their points of view ??????? 

valka’s other stuff is “oh we might have been followed leaving berk” and then her being all “astrid do u still love and believe in my son?????” what “he’ll listen to u” uhm ??? and no one else i get? ?/ they literally do not talk except about hiccup

gobber’s scene where he tells hiccup to marry astrid is so weird and awkward and only tuffnut yelling “oh no not the m word!” had anything that made it better. noah fence but astrid was all “that’s weird and awkward of you” and tells hiccup she thinks they’re “not ready for marriage” and the idea is silly and it 100% sounds like she’s not interested in him at all. and he’s obviously super invested and he’s all “haha maybe you can have snotlout” she makes “jokes” about snotlout being into valka. it was.... 

also. he ONLY mentioned snotlout when saying there’s other guys and idk. it ..... idk now i think about it it maybe feels the “joke” is kinda who would want snotlout which :/ but i guess means tuff and fishlegs are valid suitors? i don’t know 

hiccup in the whole was pretty weak tbh. like he didn’t stand out for me and most of his plot felt like it had a bunch of good ideas but they struggled putting it together. it’s like when u see a fic and u love the general idea but the execution is not how u would, and they go on and it’s like. i really really wouldn’t have 

they weirdly anthropomorphise toothless and then also. have him act like a dog and i found it disconcerting 

the light fury is genuinely super blobby and ugly and i cna’t believe they made me watch SO much of “uwuw sexy seductress” content and toothless being a complete airhead who licks a rock to “practice” for it. was weird and i was uncomfortable. 

also astrid is all “wow toothless has a girlfriend its so cute !!!!!!!” and they watch him watch other dragons doing mating dances and hiccup is like ‘i never pegged you for a romantic, like never” like get a fuckign hint !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she never kisses you on the cheek. astrid expressing sentiment cause she thinks something is romantic but never for your relationship is telling you A LOT about it 

honestly. they don’t do anything to make me convinced in ANY WAY that astrid is actually into him and wants to marry him for real. at their wedding she is SO wooden and when they kiss hiccup brings his hand up but astrid is just STANDING there,,, and they look so blank. it’s so. 

also. i was right astrid was mostly just a prop for hiccup’s story and she barely interacts with anyone that isn’t hiccup or valka, and when it’s valka it’s about hiccup. 

aside from toothless, and a little bit of stormfly, the gang’s dragons are mostly just. in the background and don’t really have anything to do with anything

behind everything there were this warlords, i didn’t pick up names and apparently they were the ones who were funding drago or whatever? and they call grimmel in bc he cares about killing night furies and are hoping that it’ll mean they get all the dragons. it was kinda. i sort of liked the idea but i felt it was shoved in, and they just mentioned drago to make it seem like it was planned when they came out of nowhere. and idk not planned at all. like an idea that was good but they didn’t edit everything to make sure it fit. a lot of stuff felt kind retcon-y like apparently stoick was “obsessed with finding the hidden world” and he even mentions in a flash back that it’s not the nest they’re looking for in httyd1 so it’s so weird like. and there was this ~journals~ stoick had about it and it’s just! they never ever mentioned this before gfhsdfjhdfgjdfgfdg guys. that’s so fucking messy and kinda annoying. in the grand scheme this retconning isn’t too much, but it’s enough that it’s like. none of this was planned and i can tell and instead of making it match up you just bluster through like “actually this always happened” as if u think i’m a dumbass who will just blindly believe whatever you tell me instead of a long time fan with a personal involvement.i know some of u read my blog,,, come on   

i didn’t cry at all like lol. i had fun but i wasn’t emotional. 

no characters die don’t worry

ruff was PERFECT and everything she did was wnoderful and i LOVE her so much! she got to speak A LOT and she’s all “it’s so tough being this hot” i love you girl, and she’s over eret and is like “wow he missed out” and talks about snotlout and fishlegs which was :///// but the guys don’t do the whole fighting over her thing so that’s! and she’s like “i guess fishlegs but he’s a nerd” and at the end he cries at the wedding and she’s like “wow i guess the sensitive guy wins” so a lot of her stuff was kinda about men ://// but herself was PERFECT and she boops grimmel’s face with the bobble ends of her hair pretending they’re a zippleback. she makes jokes about why is grimmel’s face so long, and her’s is long but WOW does that take the cake. and she says “astrid round face” it was so !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she’s so good i love her 

rupple does a good job with tuff. the voice difference was noticeable and i kept thinking about it but i think he did well. tuff gets a bunch of speaking parts and he’s super involved with the whole wedding concept and he’s like “haha wow hiccy, a DOES NOT WANT to get married 2 u LOL. which is #tru cause like. she’s a viking warrior queen and you’re well you. you need to shape up. also. be more like me” which i will TAKE i cannot believe tuffstrid is REAL. also now im about 80% convinced hiccup and astrid took a break to see other ppl and tuffstrid fucked. tuff and astrid don’t really interact except for when they leave ruff behind but they KEEP on doing this whole, vibe thing that makes them seem like they’re good friends. like. tuff thinking he knows what astrids want or admires and he actually goes and all his advice/pep talk is like half leg jokes but it’s all good????? tuff has ear piercings, they’re SO on point they look so good, and he’s got rings all over his fingers i love this kid so much he’s so great. he calls his braid his beard and whenever anyone looks a little sad he like, shoves their face into his braid to comfort them.

also tuff says there’s no edge of the world cause actually it’s round like the sun and the moon and stars, even tho stars are dumb. 

i was right fishlegs’ first sentence is basically them all going “wow a nerd” akdshgfkdjghfg. he doesn’t get as much screen time as the others, and most of it is focused on fishmeat, who is ADORABLE and PERFECT. that big moose dragon meets fishmeat at the start and they become bffs and he defends his lil buddy

snotlout’s also not as much screen time, and most of it is him following valka around and being impressed with her and wanting her to say nice things about him. the rest is him getting caught on his cape. valka says nice stuff about eret cause he’s actually good at this planning stuff (except one bit thats played for jokes where snotlout is like “we should spilt up cause *good reasons*” and then eret is like “we should spilt up cause i feel like it” and valka’s all “i trust your instincts!!!!”. it was weird bc it was the only really good tactical decision snotlout made and it gets ignored) and he keeps getting his ego pumped up when he takes what valka says wrong - like she’s being polite, or there’s double meanings and he takes it like he’s good but all he did was get caught on a cage and hung there until hookfang picked him up - and at the end she says “eret maybe brawn, but you’re the brains” and snotlout feels validated again but he doesn’t really deserve it? like idk i wish she said something meaningful. it’s not kind to make someone feel like they’re good at something they’re not. you should encourage him when he’s doing well. 

eret is just kinda. around. doing things. and being like, snotlout’s “rival” for valka’s attention and eret is like. what are you on about lmao

also. i’ve seen some out of context spoilers and they mentioned something being gay but i don’t know where that’s from? snotlout kinda says some great things about eret but it’s a real squint and gobber says eret has the body of a norse god but then he says he does as well and then puts a crick in back when he’s stretching so it’s very clearly a joke and it’s definitely like ‘he’s fat and old and dirty its funny cause he thinks he’s attractive” rather than anything else

hmmMMmmMMMMM god ive forgotten what i’ve talked about and what i haven’t im sure i have more to say but this is already super long os. you can ask me questions if u like. send me an im or something 

[rideonwings]

The Enevitable Cliche Quarantine Story

Pairing: Hiccup/Astrid

Summary: Stranger-Neighbors lean on each other during the quarantine. 

A/N: It’s cliche and silly, but dammit, I think a lot of us need something cute and fluffy these days. There’s more written, I’m just struggling to focus on continuing, so maybe posting this will make me work on it more. Generally I don’t post things until they’re further along, but if you like it maybe I’ll get my ass in gear.  

Day 1: 

Astrid

After yesterday’s official announcement, once the panic had settled to a mild simmer, and once she’d stocked her fridge and pantry to the fullest possibly capacity with anything she could find left in the vacant grocery store, Astrid was left sitting on her couch coming to the realization that she had an unknown expanse of open time to fill and not a whole lot of ideas on how to fill it. 

Sure, she had her thesis to finish, and the gym she worked at part time had asked her to film a few workout classes a week for their clientele to follow along with, but, in the normal state of things, she was the type of person to fill her days with errands, exercise, and activity. She couldn’t even remember the last time she’d been in her apartment past 10:00am. A shelter-in-place was the opposite of all of those things.

Even if she wasn’t particularly social,  Astrid thrived on routine. Her days were scheduled, regimented, and tidy, bouncing from teaching classes at the gym to study sessions with her colleagues in her DPT program to her waitressing job at night. She wasn’t really sure what to make of this crazy concept of ‘flex time’. She strolled around her apartment a few times, looking for things to pick up or organize, leaning down to scratch her cat between the ears every time she walked passed. Finally, she sighed, flopping her arms against her side heavily and collapsed onto the couch. She flipped through her Netflix account and selected an old favorite, grabbed a blanket, and tried to embrace her new normal. 

Hiccup:

Honestly, he should have paid more attention. He’d known the world was reeling with the impacts of this virus, but he hadn’t really thought about its application to his life until his boss had sent out an email yesterday and then basically forced everyone to leave the premises until further notice. As Hiccup was packing up all of the equipment he would need to work from home for the next… while, he’d joked with Fishlegs that he should have stopped at the store earlier.

It had been a joke, and yet, now, as he roamed the grocery store looking for anything remotely appetizing, he felt woefully unprepared. As someone who didn’t spend a lot of time at home, mostly rolling out of bed, walking the dog and shuffling off to work where he’d stay way longer than he should have, he wasn’t entirely sure what ‘staples’ consisted of. He could cook, was a good cook in fact, he just never made the time for it. Now he was trying to figure out how to make a meal out of kidney beans and frozen brussel sprouts. At least he had toilet paper. 

Finally, he stumbled out of the store into the deceptively beautiful day, rolling a cart of completely random supplies to his car and wondering if he should get gas before the world ended. When he pulled up to his apartment a few minutes later, he looked up to his balcony window as he always did to see Toothless’ smiling face in the window, tail wagging hurriedly, as he waited for his owner to come inside. At least he wouldn’t be alone during this. 

Day 2:

Astrid 

Astrid never would have believed that you could get sore from sitting on the couch all day, and yet, as she rose from bed that morning, she felt the unmistakable pull of pained muscles in her lower back. 

“Gods,” she moaned, “This is going to be the month ever.”

She’d stayed up way later than normal, watching old episodes of her favorite tv shows to bring her comfort, though in reality, she’d mostly just stared through the screen and let her mind wander. Now, bending over to touch her hands to the floor, she knew that if she was going to survive this pandemic, she’d need to figure out a way to schedule her days, even when there was nothing to fill them with. Maybe she could learn to cook? For someone as health obsessed as she was, she lived predominantly on protein shakes, microwaved lunches and cheese and crackers. Half of the groceries she’d bought over the last week she had no idea what to do with. 

Astrid turned on her coffee maker and fed Stormfly, continuing to stretch out cramped muscles as the scent of coffee filled the apartment. The sun was shining brightly from her balcony window, so once she’d filled a mug just the way she liked it, she opened the sliding door and curled herself into one of the padded wicker chairs her mom had dropped off one day after cleaning out her garage in preparation for her move across the country. 

As she sat there and sipped at her drink, she tried to remember the last time she’d actually been out here. It wasn’t exactly secluded: the balcony itself was only about 12 feet long and 5 feet wide, with a few feet of gap between it and the one next to it, though it looked out onto a fairly nice part of town with a park.

She didn’t really know her neighbors, either. The man in the unit to her right seemed to work opposite schedules as her, waking up later than her and coming back when she was getting ready for bed. She’d only really seen him from afar, walking his dog or getting in and out of his car on the weekends, but she thought he was about her same age. Her other neighbor was a cranky old man that never spoke to her and made it clear that he preferred it that way. The few times they’d bumped into each other at the mail slot he’d been gruff and rude, and honestly, she hadn’t tried to be nice after that. It hadn’t seemed worth the effort. 

It wasn’t exactly warm out, being late March and all, but she pulled her bare legs into her hoodie and enjoyed the quiet. Astrid tried to remember the last time she’d felt like she didn’t have to be somewhere, turning to face the sun more directly. After a while Stormfly edged out onto the balcony and curled up next to her, adding to her feeling of contentment. 

An explosion of noise erupted from her right, jerking her out of her trance and spilling her remaining coffee all over the cement as she jumped. She whipped around to find the source, noticing her neighbor’s black dog with his nose pressed against the window, staring intently at Stormfly, who had poked her head up to return the glare, apparently unimpressed with the dog’s theatrics. Astrid swore under her breath as she wiped coffee from her hoodie sleeve, cursing the dog for ruining a nice moment.

“Toothless, Gods, what is wrong with you?!” She heard from inside the unit. She looked over to see the dog’s owner glaring at the excited animal before he opened the door slowly, letting the dog onto the balcony. The dog - a black lab - slinked onto the balcony like spilled ink and came directly to the railing, still looking at Stormfly and sniffing interestedly but refraining from barking. “I’m sorry if he scared you,” the man said, running his hands through his longish hair and looking decidedly sleepy. “He’s not actually trying to attack you or your cat, he just wants a friend.” 

Astrid nodded, still feeling a little annoyed at the disruption, but accepting the apology. She shifted, picking Stormfly off of her lap and putting her down. “It’s okay, he just surprised me.” 

“Sorry, he’s always crazy in the morning.” The neighbor-guy said, his tousled hair falling over his eyes as he scratched the dog, who wiggled ridiculously in response, looking up at his owner adoringly. “Once he’s had his walk he’ll calm down.” 

Astrid smiled despite herself at the dog’s happy reaction. “You still get to take him on walks?” 

Neighbor-guy shrugged. “I’d assume so, as long as I stay away from crowds and other people. Otherwise I’m going to have to send the government a bill for carpet cleaning.” 

Astrid snickered. “I’m not sure they’ll have that in their budget after all this is over.”

Neighbor-guy smiled, and Astrid was struck by how cute it was. “I’m going to go take him out. Wish me luck.”

“Good luck.” Astrid replied, standing from her chair as they went back through their sliding door. She then made her way back inside to refill her mug before opening her computer to work on her thesis. Maybe she’d lucked out and found someone to keep her company during all this. 

Hiccup

As eerie as it had been to walk Toothless in the nearly deserted streets and parks of their town, Hiccup had taken advantage of the extra time in his day to really tire his buddy out, walking for nearly two hours while simultaneously calling into conference calls for work and enjoying the sunshine. 

Now, settled back in his apartment, his stump was throbbing as a result of the extra activity. He wrapped a cold, wet washcloth around the base of his left leg and settled onto his balcony with his computer and a beer, because why not? It was after noon!

Popping in his headphones, he opened his CAD program and began refining some specs on his latest project. While the extra screens on his workstation would have been helpful for this, he was perfectly content out here. Toothless nestled against him at the seat of his chair.

Hiccup lost track of time, alternating between chatting with Fishlegs and uploading revisions to their project board. He hardly noticed when his make-shift ice pack dried and fell off his leg. He was finally jostled out of his focused state when Toothless jumped up from beneath him, trotting over to the railing bordering the neighboring unit. Hiccup turned to see what the dog was getting up to, only to see the woman next door coming out onto the balcony again, her cat curled around her heels. She smiled at him, waving hesitantly. He pulled the headphones from his ears and returned her wave. “Hey.”

“I see you survived.” She said with mild amusement. Her bright blue eyes -  so bright that he could distinguish their color even from this distance - trailed down to Toothless, before catching on his half-leg. “Oh!” She exclaimed softly, her hand flying to her mouth. 

Hiccup instinctively folded his knee, tucking his stump underneath him. “Don’t worry, that wasn’t a casualty of this morning’s trip, it’s old.” He said, trying to lighten her reaction. “As far as I know, this virus isn’t known for removing limbs.” 

“No… I…” The blonde blushed, her hand clenching reflexively at her side. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have reacted that way. It just surprised me.” 

Hiccup smiled kindly. “It’s fine, really. People don’t expect it. I guess Toothless and I both are full of surprises.” He said, gesturing to the dog’s own stump, which fell just short of his hock. Astrid’s eyes widened again and she came to crouch at the bars of her railing.

“I never noticed when I saw you walking him, he moves so well!” She said, reaching towards the lab instinctively, though her hand fell a few feet short. “You two match.” 

“Yeah, we took that dog / owner costume thing one step too far.” Hiccup joked and she laughed. “He has a little mini-prosthetic to match mine, he just doesn’t need to wear it in the house.” 

The girl pulled her chair up closer to the bars and sat down. “I’m Astrid.” She said, reaching down to scratch her cat between the shoulder blades. “And this is Stormfly.” 

Hiccup reached towards her and mimed shaking her hand. “I’m Hiccup, and this is Toothless.” 

“Two very unusual names.” Astrid commented. 

“Yeah, we’re aware.” He responded with a smile. “I was a runt, his baby teeth were late coming in… it’s amazing we’ve survived this long.” 

Astrid smiled - Gods, she had a nice smile - and stood. “I’ll be right back.” She ducked back into her house and came back a few minutes later with a glass of wine. “I liked your idea.” She said, gesturing to his beer, which was nearly empty, it’s dregs warm. “Though it seems a bit early.” 

Hiccup shrugged. “Maybe. It honestly feels like there are no rules right now.”

“Are you working? I don’t mean to disturb you if you are, I was just getting a little stir-crazy in my place.” 

“Yeah, but nothing too time consuming. I could use a break.” Hiccup replied, reaching to drink the last sip of his beer. “Let me grab another one.” He stood from his seat, hopping on his good leg through the door. He’d intentionally set up his apartment furniture at perfect distances so he could hop without his prosthetic or a crutch when he needed to, using chairs, tables and desks as handholds along the way.

In a few minutes he was seated back outside, facing his new neighbor-friend. 

“Is this six feet, do you think?” He said jokingly, gesturing to the distance between them. “I am just over 6’2”, I could lay down across the bars to measure it more accurately.” 

Astrid smiled into her wine glass. “I think we’re probably good, as long as we agree to sneeze in the other direction.” She took a sip before gesturing to his computer. “What were you working on?”

“It’s a diagram for an artificial knee,” he said, “trying to improve the rotational capacity of an older model of knee replacements.” 

Astrid’s eyebrows rose. “Wow, that’s…. Cool. What do you do exactly?” 

“I’m a biomechanical engineer for a company that basically improves medical equipment. You?”

Astrid tucked her hair behind her ears. “I work as a physical trainer at a gym, and I’m getting my Doctorate of Physical Therapy and a masters in history. I work as a waitress too, but obviously that’s probably not going to last with all this happening.” 

“Cool about the Doctorate, sorry about the waitressing gig.” Hiccup replied, noting the concern on her face. 

“It’s fine, it’s not like that was what I wanted to do, it just helped pay the bills. I’m still getting paid for the time being, and the gym pays me as long as I keep doing a few online videos, but it’s just generally going to be a little scary for a while.” 

Hiccup felt instantly guilty and lucky for his own situation, knowing that he was in stable employment that wouldn’t be severely impacted. He instinctively wanted to offer to help her in any way she needed, but bit his tongue. He hardly knew her, after all. 

“I’m sorry.” He said, not knowing what else to say. “Hopefully everyone gets with the program and we can shorten the lifespan of this thing so we can get back to normal soon.” 

Astrid nodded, frowning slightly. “Yeah, hopefully.” 

They sat in an awkward silence for a few minutes. Then, Astrid laughed weakly. “There’s no reason to play the pity game, though, right? We’re only on day two. Honestly, I’m more worried about how I’m going to feed myself for the next few weeks.” 

Hiccup smiled weakly, noting her attempt to deflect from her real anxieties. “Were you not able to grab groceries?”

“Oh, no I’m fully stocked, unfortunately, I have no idea how to cook half of the things in my pantry.” 

Hiccup laughed, glad for the break in the tension. “Well, I could probably help you with that. I myself have the most random selection of food known to man in my fridge, so I’ll need to get really creative with my meals.” 

Astrid laughed. “Maybe we can potluck this situation. I have a startling amount of ramen in my pantry for someone that doesn’t like ramen.” 

“How do you not like ramen? Even when you put an egg in it?” 

It was Astrid’s turn to look at him skeptically. “Why would I put an egg in it?” 

Hiccup’s jaw dropped. “What? You don’t know?” Astrid shook her head. “It changes everything, it makes it totally amazing. How did you possibly make it through college without adding egg to your ramen??” He said jokingly. 

Astrid shrugged, giggling. “By not eating much ramen, I guess. It’s not exactly health food.” 

Hiccup smiled, tweaking his eyebrow at her. “Feeling adventurous?”

10 Minutes Later     - 

“Okay, the water is boiling.” Astrid called from her kitchen. Hiccup sat on the railing of his balcony, legs hanging over the side as he gripped the bars. 

“Okay, add the noodles and seasoning, then crack your egg into a separate bowl and whisk it.” He called, only able to see her part of her back as she worked at her stove. “Once the noodles start to soften, add the egg mixture and start stirring it in.”

Astrid complied, turning around to look at him. “It looks gross, it’s all clumpy.” 

“You gotta stir it more, really mix it in there.” 

“Okaaay…” 

After a few minutes, she looked over her shoulder at him, her expression changed. “Oh, it looks creamy now.” 

“There you go, that’s what should be happening.” Hiccup said, heart warming at her smile. 

“That’s so cool!” 

“Right? Once you get the hang of it, you can add all kinds of veggies and stuff to it to make it even more delicious, you just have to get the timing right on it.” He maneuvered himself down from the railing back onto his porch.

“One step at a time, Gordon Ramsay.” She said sarcastically. There was the sound of dishes clinking, and after a few more minutes, she came out onto the balcony holding two bowls with paper towels under them. “Err.. I am not really sure if we’re supposed to be sharing dishes and food, but… it’s too much for me to eat alone.” 

Hiccup shrugged, reaching across the bars to take a bowl from her. “I’ll accept the risk in this situation.” 

They sat in their respective chairs, enjoying their late afternoon snack and chatting. Hiccup couldn't remember the last time he’d enjoyed a conversation with someone this much, especially someone he’d never spoken to before that day. 

They sat out in their separate spaces until the sun began to dip, only going inside to grab drinks or use the facilities, or once, for Hiccup to let Toothless out on another short walk. Finally it got to be a little too chilly to be enjoyable, and they began to clean up their areas. 

Before she went inside, Astrid turned to him with a small smile. “See you tomorrow?” She asked, a teasing sort of hope in her eyes. 

Hiccup smiled brightly. “Definitely.”

[xenosaurus]

ty for reblogging that hetalia/snk post its disgusting that people still like those now that we should know better or ever did in the first place tbh but im always scared of getting attacked for it

You know, I’ve actually been thinking about this issue a lot lately, so thank you for bringing it up!

Hetalia and SnK are easy to group together because they’re both fascist propaganda, but they’re really different sorts of propaganda.  I was drawn into both of them at different times, and while that’s embarrassing to admit, I think it’s important to talk about because you CAN deprogram yourself from the way you’ve been affected by propaganda if you stop engaging and really force yourself to examine what the fuck you were doing.  So, here we go.

SnK takes itself seriously and I don’t really blame its young fans for not immediately spotting the fascist ideology– it comes across as a post-apocalyptic story about fighting eerily human giant monsters.  Of course, now that it’s revealed its true colors as blatant holocaust story where the jewish people are cannibal monsters, NOBODY should be supporting it in any way, but it really isn’t the same kind of propaganda as Hetalia.

The point of SnK is to make fascism seem necessary, and to paint its instigators as grim heroes who do what’s needed to protect their people.  Levi is SnK’s ideal of a “good” fascist leader– he’s heroic even when flawed or unlikable, horribly violent to child soldiers but only to “save” them, and torn up by the “necessary” losses of war.

Hetalia is far more blatant in being about fascism, but the whole point is to make you IGNORE fascism.

I couldn’t watch war movies in high school without crying because I was so torn up by how horrible war is, but I was into Hetalia.  How the fuck did THAT happen?  Well, Hetalia sterilizes the hell out of its subject matter.

Here’s how amazon describes Hetalia on the box set:

Forget everything you learned in history class, and imagine all the nations of the world as cute guys hanging out on a wildly inappropriate reality show. Now, toss in every stereotype ever and prepare to pledge allegiance to your favorite superpower in Hetalia Axis Powers!

Maybe you’ll surrender to Italy’s charms. He’s a sweetie who’s always got a noodle in his mouth and he’s bff with blue-eyed Germany and shy Japan. Sounds nice, right? Of course, their friendship sort of causes world war II, but is that really such a big deal? Not if it means those adorable allies France, America, and England will be stormin’ the beach! No matter who comes out on top, victory is yours! Now ditch your textbooks and try to keep up, because history happens fast in Hetalia Axis Powers!

Hetalia is here to convince you that fascism is a toothless puppy dog that pissed on the rug but it’s so cute you can’t stay mad!  Don’t you just LOVE how cute nazi germany and fascist italy are together?  Annexing countries by force is just like breaking into your neighbor’s house and refusing to leave!  Battles that killed thousands are a water gun fight on the beach!  England is so sad that all his colonies left, he’s an empty nest dad, not an imperialist power that violently colonized half the world.

It feels obvious when you’re really looking into it, but the target audience is teenagers, and it’s yaoi bait.  It’s not hard to find ADULTS who think anything that reads as gay has to be progressive, even if it’s a rape joke about colonization.  It’s supposed to be popcorn media, something goofy and simple that you don’t really think about because it’s a 2 minute short about silly cute anime boys.  Why would you read into it?

Well, because it’s training you to sympathize with nazi germany.  That’s why.

[acuppellarp]

SECRET SANTA WEEK 3!

Thank you to everyone who signed up to participate! And remember if you missed signing up for this week, you have the option to join in for the final week!

Each character participating in this week’s Secret Santa has (at random) been given a holiday-inspired alias. Below the cut is an alphabetized list of aliases and their respective questionnaire answers.

In just a few moments you should receive via Tumblr IM and a Discord message letting you know which alias your character has been paired with to deliver a Secret Santa gift.

Remember that you have until 11:59PM EST on Friday to submit your gift to the Main or April for your assignee.

On Saturday all gifts and Secret Santa pairs will be revealed via April’s blog.

If there’s any confusion or you have questions, please let us know! Happy gifting!

BLIZZARD

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Greece, Bali, Amalfi Coast.  No other reason that they all look beautiful and I adore beautiful things.   What’s your go-to drink order? Soy latte.  Red wine.   Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Jasmine! Is there anything you collect? Criterion collection films.  Vinyl records. Shoes.   Do you have a favorite animal? Anything fuzzy and cute.

BLUE CHRISTMAS

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Australia, Ireland or Amsterdam. No particular reason. Maybe to see a kangaroo in Australia, but other than that, they’ve just always intrigued me. Oh, and accents!  What’s your go-to drink order? Water, usually. Coconut preferred. Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Is Mulan considered a princess? Mulan or Tiana.  Is there anything you collect? Not anymore but I collected seashells when I was younger that I still keep in a display case.  Do you have a favorite animal? I wouldn’t save favorite, that’s kind of mean…I love all animals but I am biased towards monkeys and sloths….just a bit but I LOVE THEM ALL!!

CANDY CANE

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Oh, gosh. I’ve never really thought about it. I’d love to take a road trip of the United States. There’s so much beauty here that I’d love to see. I’d love to go to Seattle, or the National Parks, or to Disney World. I’ve never been! What’s your go-to drink order? I’m a sucker for a good cup of cocoa. Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Rapunzel! Is there anything you collect? Knitting needles, vinyls, anything with an owl. Do you have a favorite animal? I’ve been told I’m like a bunny, but I love owls.

DOMINICK THE DONKEY

Where are three places you’d like to travel? I want to go to every single Disney park in the world What’s your go-to drink order? Long Island Iced Tea, what up. Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? My favorite Disney princess is Loki. Is there anything you collect? Funko pops! I have twenty seven! Do you have a favorite animal? Sloths. They’re so cute. I wanna snuggle them.

DONNER

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Los Angeles - I’d love to run into a celebrity or two, Grand Canyon - it looks so gorgeous in pictures!, Disney World What’s your go-to drink order? White Chocolate Mocha Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Ariel, Prince Phillip, Pascal the chameleon Is there anything you collect? Postcards Do you have a favorite animal?  Alpacas are just too cute.

ELSA OF ARENDELLE

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Greece, France, The Caribbean islands. I like sunning on warm beaches, art, and beautiful architecture.  What’s your go-to drink order? Vodka Martini.  Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Megera and Lilo.  Is there anything you collect? Old play scripts.  Do you have a favorite animal? Owls.

FRUITCAKE

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Zambia, Paris and Cuba. They’re beautiful places and a couple beautiful stages I’ve always wanted on. What’s your go-to drink order? Horchata with espresso or rum or both Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Aladdin and Maleficent. If I were Aladdin I’d be all up on Maleficent. Is there anything you collect? I used to collect sexy ladies but now just some good memories or whatever Do you have a favorite animal? All Jungle cats

JELLY

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Glass Beach in Fort Bragg, California because it has SO MUCH gorgeous sea glass and it just looks like a place of dreams. I’ve always been a fan of the beach. It’s my happy place! What’s your go-to drink order? Tequila shots. It’s a bad vice. Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Dug from Up! Is there anything you collect? I own WAY too many mugs. Probably pushing to 30 mugs, I’m not sure. But they can’t be just regular mugs. They’re really weird ones. My favorite mug that I own is one where you can stick legos on it! It’s fun on a mug!  Do you have a favorite animal? Llamas. So. Many. Puns.

JOY

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Nickelodeon Universe inside Mall of America, Universal Studios, and somewhere in Hawaii. Two places to have fun and one place to look HOT. What’s your go-to drink order? Roscato red wine.  Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Disney movies don’t come CLOSE to Dreamworks. So I’m gonna bend the rules and give you Dreamworks. Toothless.  Is there anything you collect? Other than my Ninja Turtles EVERYTHING. Does lingerie count? Cuz I got lots.  Do you have a favorite animal? Snakes or turtles.

KRAMPUS

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Dominican Republic, cause home. France, cause accents. Australia, cause koalas. What’s your go-to drink order? Grande iced caramel macchiato with coconut milk, one pump vanilla. Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Disney is stupid. Is there anything you collect? Do broken hearts count? Do you have a favorite animal? No.

MILKING MAID

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Scotland because it is most like Harry Potter, duh. What’s your go-to drink order? Tequila (shots shots shots) Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Goofy, he’s a clown. You gotta love a clown. Is there anything you collect? Silly strings, just can’t bare to part with them. Do you have a favorite animal? Is all of them an acceptable answer? Though I do love me some small dogs and cats.

NOEL

Where are three places you’d like to travel? The Maldives, Thailand, Bora Bora. I like anywhere tropical, or anywhere I can be in as little clothing as possible. My soul belongs to the ocean. What’s your go-to drink order? Mojito. Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Esmeralda or Kida. Is there anything you collect? Magazines, earrings, purses. Do you have a favorite animal? A fox, because I am one.

PARTRIDGE

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Hawaii, California, Europe. I’d like to live somewhere completely different from where I’ve been before, if that makes any sense. I think it would be nice to go somewhere tropical, or somewhere it’s always sunny. I’ve been to Europe twice and I love the energy there. What’s your go-to drink order? Medium drip. Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Megara or Elsa. Is there anything you collect? Original Cast Recordings of various Broadway shows. I also collect hand wraps for boxing. Do you have a favorite animal? I do! It’s a canary.

PIPING PIPER

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Iceland, Tokyo, Africa. Or Australia, maybe? And I’d love to see the Rocky Mountains. Basically, I want to see it all.  What’s your go-to drink order? Tea. English breakfast if I had to choose one. Or water. But on a night out I enjoy a cider or a nice cold amber beer.  Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Jane from Tarzan. Or Belle from Beauty and the Beast.  Is there anything you collect? Lots of things. Dice. Funkos. Board games.  Do you have a favorite animal? Hard to choose just one but I love badgers.

POINSETTIA

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Tbh I always go where I want to travel irl. So I’m going to pick mythical places to go which are for sure: Hogwarts (because it’s a school that’s a castle, how is that NOT 100% fab), Narnia (i’d be able to give them such good fashion tips especially for the snow), and Atlantis (who DOESNT want to see mermaids?!) What’s your go-to drink order? I love to be wined and dined, so duh, wine is a first choice p much always. Also Cosmos. But since it’s winter I also love a good cup of hot cocoa made with MILK (not water), has cinnamon infused, marshmallows properly melted, a NOT stingy amount of whipped cream + sprinkles. Legit the only alway to drink it. Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Princess: it’s a tie between Jasmine and ariel tbh. Prince: prince phillip bc he fights a dragon for his girl which is such lesbian behavior. Character: minnie, duh. she’s the OG queen of disney bitches!!! Is there anything you collect? movie props are such a major must collect, records, personalized celebrity autographs, followers… Do you have a favorite animal? I love ALL animals, even gross bugs. But if it was legal to own a Sugar Glider, then i’d have one of those because they’re a fave

SCROOGE

Where are three places you’d like to travel? This one really good deli in Brooklyn I haven’t been back to in a while. Their sandwiches are awesome.  Washington State because there’s some great camping spots. Hawaii. Going snorkeling would be pretty cool.   What’s your go-to drink order? Hot chocolate, beer, or water.   Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Hercules.   Is there anything you collect? I have a little record collection, but that’s about it!   Do you have a favorite animal? Every single dog in the world.

SNOOPY

Where are three places you’d like to travel? california, for the waves and the legalized activities there, hawaii, for the waves and the babes, and canada I guess, because why not eh? What’s your go-to drink order? i keep it simple— a regular cup of joe is the way to go Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? I don’t know what mulan counts as, but definitely her Is there anything you collect? batfam comics, ducktales comics, some anime funko pops, I might even have a state quarter coin collection but keep that on the DL Do you have a favorite animal? wolves… but also penguins might be a top contender if we’re being honest

STAR

Where are three places you’d like to travel? St. Simons, Georgia, Taos Pueblo, New Mexico, and Telluride, Colorado. There are plenty of places I’d like to go but I’ve heard those are some of the most beautiful small towns in America. I like finding the beauty in home. What’s your go-to drink order? Matcha Tea Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Tiana and Merida and Wall E Is there anything you collect? POPs Do you have a favorite animal? Hippocampus

TURTLE DOVE

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Bali. Simply because it looks gorgeous. Paris because who doesn’t want to go to Paris? And of course London, think of all the plays I’d get to see at the West End! What’s your go-to drink order? Chai Latté is my to go most of the time. But I do enjoy a good cocktail or two every now and then. My favorite is the Cosmopolitan. Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? I’m going to have to go with Tiana. Princess and The Frog is one of my absolute favorite Disney movies. The music is superb and I just love how driven Tiana is. She has a dream and she’s following it, no matter at what cost. Is there anything you collect? Playbills. Do you have a favorite animal? I love quite a few animals. I find Alpacas incredibly hilarious. Have you ever heard them make noises? But I’m really also just a classic cat person.

TWINKLE LIGHTS

Where are three places you’d like to travel?  would love to visit Spain. I think the culture is beautiful and so romantic! What’s your go-to drink order? Latte, any day, all day, heck I’d even settle with espresso. Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Rapunzel. I like her hair and she’s headstrong. Is there anything you collect? Coffee mugs, rocks, erasers. Do you have a favorite animal? Dogs, for sure.

VIXEN

Where are three places you’d like to travel? Europe, I guess? Idk, everyone does Europe after college, right? What’s your go-to drink order? Black coffee or vodka soda. Who’s your favorite Disney Princess/Prince/Character? Tinkerbell. Or Marie from Aristocats. Is there anything you collect? Enemies. Do you have a favorite animal? Horses.