#took a nap and gotta stay up cause someone quit so i got night shift schedule for this week

[noworldasgoodasmine]

I have decided that lime juice is gonna be my go to with alcohol, it does a better job of overpowering the taste than orange juice which is my usual go to

[fruitcoops]

Sometimes I forget that Leo is 19 and can’t drink in the states. I think he would get away with stealing drinks from the boys or having someone on the team order for him in public for a while but once the season’s started and people are actively watching the games, the bartenders and wait staff start to figure out who he is and catch him being sneaky

I only write drunkenness on a case-to-case basis because it squicks me out sometimes, but something about this ask really stuck with me. To @lalalasocks, I hope your sinuses feel better! Have some outside perspective of Coops to soothe the soul <3 SW credit goes to @lumosinlove!

TW for a drunken rookie (no explicit alcohol)

“Pots and I are going to take it up the left,” Sirius said, never taking his eyes off his whiteboard as he drew out the lines of the play. iPads were generally the more conventional tool, but he had a thing for tradition and Sirius Black’s flair for the dramatic never ceased to amaze. “Knutty?”

Leo nodded and leaned forward, swiping a drop of sweat off his temple with a glance toward the game as Talker flew past. “I’ll be in for the rest of the period as soon as Coach calls it.”

“Bien.” He tapped Remus’ shoulder pad with the end of his pen and marked a path up the other side. “Loops, the puck is coming to you fast, so you need to keep eyes on us. Once you get it, turn on the jets and get it in. Good?”

“Good,” Remus confirmed, bumping fists with James. Leo watched them with no small amount of surprise—even though Remus had only been a player for six months, their line was rock-solid. James was the powerhouse while Remus flashed down the ice; Sirius counterbalanced them both in the middle. He was grateful he wasn’t the one to see them coming at him on plays.

“1, 6, 7, 12!” Coach barked. Leo clenched his teeth around his mouthguard and got ready to hop the boards. A swish of skates, a bump of Kasey’s shoulder, and it was game time.

-----------

“I love you,” Leo hiccupped, plopping himself down in Logan’s lap and tangling a hand in his dark curls. He went to kiss his cheek, then frowned. “Oh.”

“Hi,” Sirius laughed with a gentle pat his side. “Good night so far, Knutty?”

Leo made a face. “Where’s my Canadian?”

“I have no idea.”

His lip slid out even further into a pout. “He told me I could sit on his lap,” he whined plaintively, resting his head in the crook of Sirius’ shoulder with a heavy sigh. The bar was warm—a little too warm, actually—but it felt nice to be sitting on something soft rather than feeling the sticky floor under his sneakers. And there was one more reason he needed to find Logan, one other highly important thing… “An’ I gotta give him a kiss.”

“Do you want to go look for him?”

Leo made a noncommittal noise and swung his leg under the table absently, letting the alcohol in his system lift all his post-game tiredness away. His head hurt a little from being awake so long. “How ‘bout I stay here and wait?”

“I think it’s about time to get you home.”

Leo sighed again, picking at a string on the knee of his ripped jeans. “Am I squishing you?”

“Non.”

“Mmkay.” A bright square of light half blinded him and he squinted. “Who’re you texting?”

“Finn.”

“Why?”

“So that he can pick you up and get you home before you fall asleep on me,” Sirius said, quite amused for some reason. “Comfy, rookie?”

He shifted even closer into the warmth and closed his eyes. Usually he got horny when he drank, but that feeling had already passed and a nap was sounding awful nice. “I like it when you call me that. Hate when other people do it, but it’s different with you.”

Sirius gave his upper arm a light squeeze. “Glad to hear it.”

“Used to drive me nuts,” he snorted. “Those first couple’a weeks on the team were rough.”

“…why?”

“Cause I had a huge crush on you.”

Cozy silence fell between them until Sirius moved to look at him. Leo blinked sleepily. “You what?”

“Well, Kasey was my first crush, right? I had his jersey an’ his poster an’ he’s fucking hot, but you’re the captain.” Sirius was so nice to him. Not everyone would have let a 6’4” hockey player sit on their lap and wait for their boyfriends. At the moment, though, Sirius looked a bit like Leo had thrown ice water in his face. “And obviouslyFinn and Logan are my boys and I love them so much and they were sopretty when I met them but, y’know, it’s the thrill of the captain vibe.”

“Am I interrupting something?” a new voice asked through poorly-suppressed laughter.

Leo turned his head to look up with a smile. “Hey, Loops, how’re you?”

“Pretty good.” Remus shared a look with Sirius, grinning, before taking the seat next to them. “You two look…content.”

“Oh, fuck off,” Sirius said immediately, though Leo felt his chest hitch with a laugh; he tapped Leo lightly on the elbow a moment later. “Finn’s heading over, d’accord?”

“But I just got here,” he mumbled.

“You’re in my spot,” Remus teased, sliding a glass over. “Drink up, bud.”

Leo narrowed his eyes. “What is it?”

“Water.”

He thought for a second—he wasn’t thirsty, but his mouth was getting dry—and yawned, sitting up enough to stretch before grabbing it. In two gulps, it was gone. “Aw.”

Remus bit his lip and passed a different glass over. “You can have mine too, it’s okay.”

“How are both of you so nice?” he asked, looking between them in something like distress. The music was getting too loud, but they were both watching him intently. “It’s not even fair, man. Can’t you just be an asshole for once so the rest of us don’t look bad?”

Sirius shook his head and pressed the water cup into his hand. “Been there, done that. Do not recommend. Besides, the designated drivers don’t get to be mean.”

Leo felt a little better once the water was gone; he blinked slowly, scanning the crowds for any signs of Finn’s hair or Logan’s ass. Both were identifying features he would never get tired of. “Loops?”

“Yeah?”

“Why is your hair soft?”

“I—” He tilted his head to the side in confusion. “Have you ever touched my hair?”

He leaned back against Sirius, stretching his legs out until his knees popped. “No, but it looks soft. Like Finn’s, if Finn was blonder and had curls. Fluffy.”

“It’s very fluffy,” Sirius confirmed, pulling him up a little more.

“Hey!” Leo protested. “Watch the hands, your boyfriend is right there!”

Sirius rolled his eyes with a huff. “I was making sure you didn’t slide off the bench.”

“Sure,” Leo said with a suspicious glare. “Just ‘cause I won MVP for this game—”

“Okay,” Sirius groaned, standing and detangling his limbs to transfer Leo’s weight onto Remus. “I’m going to go get your boyfriends from wherever they got distracted, and then you’re going to go home and sleep so you’re not dying at practice tomorrow. Oui?”

He disappeared into the mass of people without giving Leo time to respond, wiping his hands on the thighs of his jeans as he craned his neck to see over people’s heads. “Rude,” Leo sulked, cuddling up into Remus’ side instead.

“I know, right?” He took a sip of something lemony and Leo pulled a face. “What?”

“Aren’t you DD?”

“Last I checked, DD’s are allowed to drink lemonade,” he laughed, patting the top of his head. “That was an awesome save in the third, by the way. You could’ve got the hat from that one alone.”

“Which one?” Leo yawned again, licking his lips to rid them of the stickiness he could feel forming.

“The splits one.”

“Mmm, yeah, that was pretty badass.” More people darkened his periphery and he scooted over to make room. “Hey, mes amours.”

“I hear you were bothering our dear captain?” Finn asked, kissing his cheek with a grin. There was no alcohol on his breath, only the mint from the peppermint candies he always stole from the little container by the bar. “Come on, baby, time to go.”

“But Loops and I were talking,” he whined, though it only took a small tug on Finn’s part to get him to snuggle up into his soft shirt. “He was telling me how good I did in the game.”

A warm hand stroked his hair out of his eyes; warmer lips brushed his forehead, and he felt Logan’s hand on his knee. “Bedtime, love,” he said in a quiet voice, almost too soft for Leo to hear over the noisy bar. “Wanna be in the middle?”

Leo looked up in hope. “Really?”

“Ouais. C’mon, Knutty, up you go.”

He wobbled a little as he stood, but got his feet under him within a few moments with the help of Finn’s arm around his waist and waved off everyone else’s offered help. “Gonna be fine for practice,” he promised, patting Sirius’ hand with a nod. “Totally fine, don’t worry. Go—hic—go grind on your boyfriend, ‘kay? You both need it.”

“Sweet Jesus,” Sirius muttered. “I pity your head in the morning.”

“I’m fine,” Leo scoffed. He was already sleepy—there was no way he would have a headache, not after he had two whole glasses of water. “G’night.”

“Drive safe,” Sirius and Remus chorused as Logan fit himself under Leo’s other arm to kiss his neck twice, sending butterflies through his stomach. The outside world was nice and quiet; Leo barely got himself buckled into his seat before dozing off with his head against the cool passenger window.

[scarletdawnxx-blog]

Nightmares Chapter 1

Bucky Barnes Reader Insert.

AN: This one will be more of a short story with multiple chapters.

It started shortly after Bucky arrived at the compound upstate. You were asleep in bed when the screams pierced through the quite of the night. You shot up quickly tumbling out of bed as the sheets tangled at your feet. Grabbing the gun from your bed side table and rushing into the hall. It was quiet and dark, then you heard the screams again. They were coming from Bucky’s room. Creeping quietly towards his door, opening it slowly, gun at the ready as you looked over his room. He was laying on the floor. Bed made neatly except for the pillow he had beneath is head. He was tossing and turning, having a nightmare. You could feel the fear seeping off of him. Lowering your weapon and placing it on his dresser, you knelt down trying to wake him, instead you were met with a metal hand right around your throat.

“Bucky” you chocked out but realized he was still asleep. His hand an involuntary reflex. Your heart broke for this man. Taking as relaxing breath as you could you placed a hand gently on his cheek and allowed your power to flow from you to him. Taking his fear and pain and replacing it with a calm, safe feeling. Soon his hand released your neck and he stilled, falling into a deep peaceful sleep. You stared at him for a few moments. You knew the stories, of what he had done, or you should say what had been done to him, what he had been forced to do. Your fingers lightly traced the scars where his metal arm met flesh, sighing and picking yourself up off the floor, grabbing your weapon and making your way back to bed. You laid staring at the ceiling for a long time before you finally found sleep again.

The next morning you woke, feeling exhausted despite sleeping later than usual. That’s how it always was though. Opening yourself up and using your power was draining to say the least. When you were younger you had always found crowds of people exhausting, never really understanding why until one day, when working a shift in the E.R. You were stitching up a young child that fallen from a tree and had a nasty gash on their forehead. You could tell how scared they were, placing a reassuring hand on them and felt their fear moving up your arm as if you were physically pulling it from them, he was instantly calmed. You pulled your hand back quickly as if it had been burned. From that moment a switch had been flipped and you could feel EVERYTHING. It was overwhelming, you thought you were losing your mind. Like you were drowning and couldn’t get your head above water. A very long road later, and a few break downs learning about this ability you had, you joined the Avengers. Your powers had developed from being able to just take people’s feelings, to being able to manipulate them. You could calm, confuse, take pain away or cause it, and even make people trust you so much they would tell you their darkest secrets. Which came in handy with interrogations. You had learned to not have it on all the time. Allowing you to function somewhat normally around people. It was just so damn draining.

You groaned rolling out of bed, making your way to the bathroom, your throat dry and in desperate need of water. Turing the faucet on and filling your hands with water bringing it to your lips. You wiped your mouth and looked at yourself in the mirror. Dark circles under your eyes, hair a mess, and a very bruised throat. Bucky’s grip has been tighter than you thought. Your fingers traced over the bruises wincing slightly at the tenderness. Not having the energy to try and cover it with makeup, you crawled back into your bed and picked up your phone and sending a text to Nat, knowing she had a high necked tank top that you were hoping she would let you borrow.

Yeah, sure, everything good. She responded. You told her everything was fine but could she please drop it by your room.

A few moments later, a knock came at your door and Nat walked in, seeing you still laying in bed.

“Y/N, is there a reason we are hiding today” she asked coming over to sit on the edge of the bed. You sat up and took the shirt she offered. Her eyes widened when she saw your neck. “What...the....hell?”

“Sorry, I didn’t want the whole team seeing this,” you motioned to your neck. “Barnes was having a nightmare, he didn’t know what was happening. I calmed him down, didn’t know he had such a tight grip.”

“You’re lucky he didn’t crush your windpipe,” she said examining your neck. “If you need the day to recover, there isn’t much going on today. I’ll bring you something by to eat.” She placed a gentle hand on your knee and gave you a soft smile.

“Thanks, but I should get up and move around.”

“Alright, don’t push yourself though.” Nat got up and you nodded thanking her again for the shirt. Natasha had taken on the role of caretaker when you arrived at the compound. She was your closest friend and confidant.

You finally managed to get yourself presentable and made your way to the kitchen. Sam, Steve, and Bucky sitting around the table. You said a quite hello to them before pulling a cup for coffee down and rummaging through the cabinets for something to eat.

“How you settling in Buck?” Steve asked sipping from his own coffee mug.

“It’s been fine.” He said “First couple of nights were rough, last night seemed to be a turning point, best sleep I have had in a while.” You looked over at him from the corner of your eye. Trying to make it look like you weren’t paying attention. He did look more rested. A light coming back to his vibrant blue eyes. You tugged at the neck of the shirt Nat had given you, making sure it was fully adjusted still and hadn’t shifted to expose your discolored neck. Collecting your food and coffee you made your way towards the hall.

“Not joining us?” Sam asked seeing you go.

“Oh no, it’s ok. I don’t want to interrupt.” You said with a small smile, trying to sound pleasant and not utterly beaten.

“Stay, Bucky needs to get to know more of the team,” Steve said getting up and pulling out a chair for you. You took a deep breath and put a pleasant face on before turning and heading to the seat Steve had pulled out. “Y/N here has been a key addition to our take down of hydra.” Steve boasted making you blush as you sipped from your coffee. You could feel Bucky looking you over. He may no longer be under Hydra’s control but he was still a trained assassin and sharp shooter. Always being alert, considering everyone a threat at first. No wonder he was so uptight.

“Please, you guys go out and do the real work,” you said pushing your food around.

“So what do you do then?” Bucky asked leaning back in his chair crossing arms.

“Oh no, you gotta see it, shit is way cooler than a metal arm or super soldier serum,” Sam said and you just stared at him, like really, why does he have do that all the time.

“Don’t oversell me Sam,” you said with a slight warning tone. But he wouldn’t let up, so you placed your hand on his sending a jolt of pain up his arm.

“Damn, I meant for you to do that to him,” Sam groaned as he pulled his arm away quickly. You just sipped your drink again, and couldn’t help but feeling a little smug, you loved Sam but sometimes he just wouldn’t shut up.

“So you can cause pain?” Bucky asked amused.

“Kind of,” you said with a shrug.

“She can control emotions and brain waves. Its impressive to watch her work.” Steve added giving more and an explanation. “Speaking of which, I think Stark is inbound with a Hydra agent today. You’ll get to see Y/N in action.”

“When did this happen?” You asked, Nat had said there would be nothing today. You already felt drained from the night before.

“Early hours of the morning, I thought you knew, I saw you heading back to your room shortly after the intel came through.” Steve said, getting up and gathering his dishes.

“Uh, No, couldn’t sleep and I had just gone for a walk,” You lied gathering up your things and putting them in their proper places, Stark liked everything in the compound to always stay tidy.

You started to make your way to your room, when you felt someone walking up behind you.

“Why were you in my room last night?” Shit. Bucky.

“I wasn’t,” you said continuing on.

“Your scent was lingering when I woke up this morning,” He whispered in your ear sending a shiver down your spine.

“Really, I don’t know what you are talking about, and I don’t have a scent,” You fired back feeling a little offended. He chuckled at your annoyance.

“Sure doll, whatever you say,” he said leaving you at your door cursing yourself. Next time he can just lay on the floor and scream, you thought to yourself knowing deep down you wouldn’t let that happen.

Entering your room you put you head phones on and started your interrogation playlist to get you in the right mind set. Closing your eyes and losing yourself in the music. You must have fallen asleep because you were rudely awakened with Stark tossing a file on to you.

“What the hell Tony” you said sitting up quickly ripening the headphones off.

“No time for napping, you’re up kid” Tony said walking out and giving no explanation for his behavior. Typical Stark. You picked up the file and started to go over the intel as you walked to the interrogation room. You had all kinds brought into you, but this one was different. A higher up from deep with in Russian Hydra, the same cell that had created the Winter Soldier program. You felt anger swell in you, hot and red, thinking that these were the people who had tortured and brainwashed Bucky. The man in the room just down the hall from you that now screamed from the memories turned nightmares and couldn’t even stand to sleep in a normal bed. You were going to have fun with this one. This one would know Bucky’s pain and fear. It still clung to you from the night before, ripe and ready to use against him.

“You brought me a good one to play with today,” You said looking in to the interrogation room through the two-way window. Tony, Steve, and Bucky also looked in. Nat was in there warming him up, playing the good cop. That was usually your go to, make them feel safe and comfortable, and their secrets spill from their lips, but today, today you would be their worst nightmare.

“I don’t like that tone Y/N,” Steve said side eyeing you. You just kept staring ahead at the man in the room. He was large, muscular, he had seen his fair share of fights you could tell. Even from where you stood his arrogance seeping off of him and it disgusted you. He wasn’t scared or worried at all. Like he wanted to be caught, and you didn’t like that. You looked over at Bucky, gaging his response. Outwardly he was stoic, but you could feel his uneasiness, anger, fear. Pressing the intercom to tell Nat to come on out you made your way to the door, lightly brushing your fingers against Bucky’s hand, giving him a sense of calm before entering the room. You calmly placed the file on the table in front of you and took a seat.

“Send the red head back in, she at least looked like she knew what she was doing,” The man said in a thick Russian accent.

“Не суди книгу по обложке” (Don’t judge a book by it’s cover.) you responded catching him off guard with your Russian. Good.

“You think because you know a little Russian I’ll open up to you,” he scoffed.

“Not at all, I am curious though, how someone so high ranking could get taken so easily,” you said coolly opening his file. “You come from a long line of Hydra thugs, but your predecessors were much more impressive than you. Other than being brute muscle, what good have you really been to them,” He was getting angry and defensive, no matter how much training someone has, ego always gets in the way. “Maybe Hydra doesn’t have a use for you anymore, I’m guessing even for your high rank you don’t really know what’s going on. A curtesy rank and title, for your families long service.” You picked at his pride more, it was always the downfall of men like these. He however just sat in his smugness. Which you were very over. Your powers usually required you to be touching the other person, but sitting across from this real POS in front of you, your powers began to leak out from you, moving like long tendrils from you to the man across from you, worming their way into him. You could see the change in his eyes. You never broke eye contact with him. “We could let you go I guess, turn you over to the authorities, since you aren’t going to have anything useful for us.” You picked the file up and stood.

“Wait,” he said, and you smiled to yourself. People can only handle so much fear before their fight or flight kicks in and the amount you were feeding to his man would make even the hardest criminals wet themselves.

“Did you have something you wanted to share?” you asked sitting on the edge of the table you were both sitting at.

“Yeah, go fuck yourself,” he said before launching himself at you, fight is then just like you had hoped it would. You dodge him easily using his momentum against him, you sent him sailing into the wall. You heard a crack, probably his nose, followed by pain. It was nothing compared to what you were about to unleash on him. His own fear now mingling with what you had forced on him was almost intoxicating. He turned and swung wildly, you grabbed his arm and easily got him to the floors, straddling him you grabbed his face and sent waves of pain into him, his screams echoing off the walls filling the room in terror and he clawed at your arms trying to pull your hands off him. You pushed everything Bucky had felt under their years of torture into him, and then multiplied it. You had never felt this strong in your power before, melting this man’s mind into madness. Your nails dug into his skin causing small halfmoon cuts that began to bleed. It wasn’t to long before he was a broken whimpering mess under you. He had even actually wet himself, you really hated it when they did that. You stood looking in disgust at the man on the floor. Your adrenaline leaving you and looking up. Bucky standing in the doorway, Steve behind him with shocked looks on their faces, not realizing Bucky had burst through the door thinking you were in danger.

“He’s all yours,” you said beginning to sway from exhaustion. Everything started to go black, and the last thing you remember were strong arms catching you as your legs gave out.

[buckysrighthanddoll]

Bad Guy

Pairing: Loki x enhanced!Reader

Warnings: swearing, drinking, fluff, a lil angst, and some of the team realizing that Loki isn’t as bad as they thought he was

When you were left to babysit the God of Mischief, you weren’t phased in the slightest. Sure, there were some nerves involved; Loki was the self-proclaimed bad guy. He was the cause for countless deaths in the Battle of New York, he seemed to have minimal morals, and he had a particular distaste for humanity.

Thor brought him to earth--or Midgard, as they called it--so that Loki couldn’t wreak havoc on Asgard. He thought that his brother could use a fresh start. Loki claimed that he was sick of vying for more extraordinary things, which you believed was bullshit. This was Loki--his entire life was nothing but lies and tricks.

But, nevertheless, Tony agreed to keep him holed up in the tower. Loki was never to be alone, but that spelled bad news for anybody who wasn’t busy. More specifically, you; you weren’t the newest to the team, but you were the most humane Avenger who also had a lot of free time. You showed compassion beyond the other members, and therefore were a perfect fit for the job.

Loki mainly kept to himself. He was always in his room, but occasionally he snuck off to different areas of the compound. He always told someone beforehand, which made the team feel better, but the cameras were always kept trained on him.

The first time you were introduced to Loki, your enhanced eyes picked up on his aura. It was a dark indigo color, not too bright and not too dull. You sensed isolation and a looming sense of self-hatred. This was the first reason you took a liking to the prince. The indigo hue also meant that he was hyperaware of people’s intentions, especially the unspoken ones.

And the first time you watched over Loki, you sat in the living room with him and turned on some music while he read and you wrote. He hardly said a word, although you caught him staring at you occasionally. He would just smirk a little and look back down to his book, and you would furrow your eyebrows and continue writing.

You weren’t intimidated by Loki. No, you weren’t as powerful as him, but you could see things that others couldn’t. Auras were the easy part, but you also felt a person’s emotions (no matter how well they were hiding them), and you could sometimes hear a person’s thoughts and see their dreams.

At first, Loki saw you as weak and naive. How else could somebody be so open to dealing with him?

The next several times you watched over Loki, you found yourself getting more attached to him. The conversations weren’t deep, but they left your mind reeling. His head was hard to get into, but you still tried.

One night, Tony said to take over Sam’s shift while he went to a mission debriefing. You weren’t feeling well on a mental level, yet you agreed.

You got to Loki’s door and let Sam go, and then you knocked. Loki opened the door with a smug smirk, but it was quickly wiped away when he saw how you looked. Sweatpants and a hoodie weren’t exactly a rarity for you, but your eyes were red, and you had dark circles and messier-than-normal hair.

His eyebrows furrowed as he shifts his weight. “Can we just go lay outside or something?”

“Of course, love,” Loki responded. If you weren’t so preoccupied with dark thoughts, you’d have questioned the pet name. Loki snaps his fingers, and suddenly he’s out of his black suit and in a pair of grey sweatpants and a t-shirt.

He walked beside you to the roof, where the stars were shining as brightly as they could within New York’s light pollution. Loki remained silent as you laid your back against the cold concrete, and then he followed your actions.

“I’m sorry this isn’t our normal babysitting routine,” You said, laughing drily.

“Don’t apologize; this is quite relaxing,” He responded. You turned your head to face him, only to find that he was already looking at you. “Do you do this often? Look at the stars, I mean?”

“Only when I need perspective,” You shrugged.

“How so?”

You turned your head toward the sky, admiring the twinkling lights. “It’s easy to see the night sky as two-dimensional. It looks like someone covered the earth with a black piece of paper and poked holes in it to let the light through. But each one of those stars is millions of lightyears away. Billions, even. Humans could never even hope to travel to one of them or the solar systems that orbit.” You point out one of the stars--not that it mattered which one. “That star right there doesn’t give two shits about our problems. We are as indistinguishable to them as ants are to us. Sometimes I feel like the world is falling apart, but then I come up here, and I remember that the universe was fine without humans--and it will be fine without us once we go extinct.”

“You speak so beautifully,” Loki starts, sighing as he turns onto his side. “Your mind must be a terribly dark place.”

A scoff erupts from you, and then you’re looking at the god. “Am I that easy to read?”

“Not at all,” Loki says. “You’re always wearing a mask around the team--around me. But this is unadulterated emotion. It’s quite admirable.”

You didn’t notice it until now, but his aura has shifted. It was still a deep indigo blue, but it seemed as though his walls were let down. His emotions were more apparent than they had ever been, and his thoughts nearly screamed at you. He thought about your strength and resilience--how you’ve fought through more shit than many could handle. Yet, here you were, breathing and having philosophical conversations with a god from another world.

“You know,” You start, sitting up. “Everyone keeps telling me you’re the bad guy.”

“And you don’t see it?”

“I see what’s inside. I see so much self-hatred that you’ve turned yourself into the monster others believed you were.” A short pause ensues as you allow Loki to interpret what you’re saying. “You’re not a monster, Loki.”

“I’ve killed thousands of people. I’m the prophetical cause of Ragnarok. I’m--”

“A misunderstood being who found that his whole life was a lie, and therefore became what others said you were. That’s not a monster. That’s a mask.”

“You’ve been in my mind, haven’t you?” He smirked.

You laid back down, shoulder to shoulder with the man beside you. “Only just now. Your walls are damn near impenetrable.”

“Good,” He quips jokingly. Silence falls between you, and all you can hear is the traffic from the city that never sleeps. You both resume staring at the stars until you’ve fallen asleep, and Loki carries you inside.

As Loki exits the elevator, Steve is scared to see you limp in Loki’s arms. Nat is on the defense until she sees that you didn’t pass out or die--you were leaning into Loki, an arm propped against his chest and your head in the crook of his neck.

“Loki what the--”

“Shh,” Loki interjects, making Steve even more upset. Natasha places a hand on his shoulder as a warning to calm down, and the three of them witness you stir a bit in your slumber and bury yourself deeper into Loki’s grasp. “She fell asleep on the rooftop; I’m just putting her in her bed.”

Steve fails to find words as Loki quietly walks down the hallway to your room. Once he gets Friday to let him in, he sets you on the bed. You wake up momentarily, only to ask him to stay with you for a bit. He supposed twenty minutes wouldn’t hurt, so he crawled under the sheets and laid next to you.

The instant you felt Loki’s coolness, you cuddled right into him. Your head rested on his chest, and your arm went around his torso to hold him tighter. What Loki didn’t expect was how warm this made him feel. He rests his arm around you and brings you in even closer. The twenty minutes he had planned on spending with you turned into an overnight stay; he fell asleep with you in his arms.

From then on, you were the only one to watch Loki when the team needed it. You were kind of bummed out that you were taken off missions, but the serenity of watching him made it okay. You watched movies together, stayed in your rooms and talked for hours on end, cooked together, and took naps together.

You hated to say it, but you were falling for Loki. He was respectful, and he was slowly (but surely) growing to tolerate humans and treat them as if they weren’t beneath him.

Tony had announced he would be throwing a party for Natasha’s birthday. He was going all-out and using the entire party deck--four floors included. You showed up late due to a doctor’s appointment earlier on, so the party was lively, and everybody was intoxicated.

You had on a little black dress, and you put effort into your hair and makeup. This was Nat’s birthday, after all, and you respected her a lot. You stayed by the bar area when you arrived to catch up to everybody else’s level of inebriation.

Loki found you less than ten minutes later. There was a clear connection between the two of you, to the point that you had considered that he was listening for your thoughts. “You look amazing, love,” He said, taking a seat next to you.

“You don’t look too bad yourself,” You quipped, watching as the bartender placed five shots on the bar for you.

“Those for some friends?”

“No, they’re for me,” You responded, taking one after another. “I gotta catch up to the crowd.”

Loki chuckles, but then it drops when he sees the liquor cascading down your throat as if it’s water. “Dear, perhaps you should pace yourself.”

You shrugged and ordered a few more shots, and then a mixed drink to sip on. “I’ll be fine, Loki,” You started. You picked up the cup and chugged it back, going against the initial plan of taking it slow. Within minutes, you’re feeling the alcohol’s effects. Your mind goes fuzzy, as do your senses, and the world around you feels lighter. You decided to stop at this level for now since everything was pleasant. The loud music enticed you, and as you looked around, you saw Natasha dancing with Wanda. “And that is my cue,” You smiled, standing up. You wobbled slightly, but quickly caught yourself and briskly walked over to your teammates.

“Took you long enough,” Wanda laughed as you started dancing with them. Little conversation followed that, mostly dancing and singing to the songs.

A slower song came on, and the three of you groaned as you stepped away from the dancing crowd. Natasha and Wanda’s faces hardened as they looked just past you, which immediately told you that Loki was approaching. You turned around as he got next to you, holding out his hand.

“Would you do me the honor of sharing a dance with me?” He asked, his tone as elegant as ever. You smiled and nodded, grabbing on to his cold hand and letting him lead you a few feet over to the crowd’s edge. One of his hands settle at your waist, and yours goes to rest on his chest. He holds your other hand, and then the two of you are swaying to the beat. “They don’t like me, do they?” He asked.

You give a small smile. “It’s less that they don’t like you, and more that they don’t like you with me.”

“Well, I can’t say I blame them.”

“Why’s that?” You asked. Your eyebrows turn up slightly as you gaze up to him. Loki can’t help but think that you looked more beautiful than any goddess he had ever met.

“I’m the bad guy, remember?”

“That’s what people want you to be,” You remind him. He extends his arm to twirl you and then pull you close to him--chest to chest, face to face. “You aren’t a bad person. You put up a wall so that people can’t get close to you. When will you let them down, Loki?”

Loki looks like an angel with the aura surrounding him. It changed right in front of your eyes. Where it was once dark indigo, now it was a clear and bright red. It meant that he could overcome any obstacle and sincerely wanted to change his life for the better. It nearly took your breath away.

“Perhaps now would be a good time,” He whispered. His eyes danced from your eyes to your lips, giving a physical hint to something that you knew just from reading his thoughts. He leans down slightly to gauge your reaction; he finds you also leaning in slowly. Your lips meet somewhere in the middle, and you can just feel the energy that surrounded you both.

His lips, like the rest of his body, were cool to the touch. Yet, they welcomed the heat of your body, like two opposite ends of a magnet meeting. You slowed to a stop in your dance, focusing on the euphoria that a simple kiss brought you. Loki cups your cheek to pull you even closer. The kiss feels like it lasts years, but it was only a few seconds. Your eyes flutter open as you pull away, and a smile spreads across your face.

Nat and Wanda watch with dropped jaws from ten feet away. “I’m gonna kill him,” Wanda states.

“No, Wanda, look at her,” Nat says, directing her friend’s attention to you. “She’s smiling--she’s happy.”

“Maybe she’s faking it.”

“She isn’t faking it,” Natasha responds. “The look in her eyes gives it away. She loves him.” She adjusts her stance and focuses on Loki. “And look at Loki’s face. It has genuine emotion. It isn’t stoic; it isn’t sarcastic--he’s letting her in.”

“Well, I’ll be damned. Why didn’t she tell us?”

“She knows that nobody else trusts him.”

You could hear the conversation despite their hushed words. It was one of the perks of your enhancements. Loki could hear their thoughts, too, which caused him to smile even more. “Would you like to go to bed?” Loki asks you. You nod your head and let him lead you away from the party, into the elevator, and down to the residence levels.

You take off your makeup and change into comfortable clothes, and Loki does the same. It was routine now to hop into the bed together and immediately hold each other. This time, though, when the movie is turned on, neither of you focus on the plot. You’re too wrapped up in each other, kissing whenever one of you felt like it, talking here and there, and just being absorbed into each other’s consciousness.

Loki was the proverbial bad guy. He had done horrible things in his past, and he had turned himself into a monster because his father had told him he was one. But Loki wasn’t bad at all; he was misunderstood, yes, but not evil. This was a man that you could spend all of your days with, and who wouldn’t drain you. He was not a monster. He could never be a monster.

[twokinkybeans]

FALLEN LIKE SNOW - CHAPTER 4: SET, MATCH

Written by @jeranasblog​ and Kinkybeanlien

Moodboard by @jeranasblog​

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The rest of the week in Austria goes by surprisingly smooth. Then... The Charity Gala.

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Notes: Adult Peter Parker, Fake dating, One sided  nemies to lovers, No powers!AU, Mutual pining, Sugar daddy!Tony, Sugar  baby!Peter, Fluff, Smut and Angst.

Smut tags (some for later): Wet Dream, Dry Humping, Daddy Kink, Mirror Sex, Dom/Sub Undertones, Bondage, Humiliation, Oral Sex,  Anal Sex, Fingering, Edging, Lingerie, Dom/Top!Tony, Sub/Bottom!Peter

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Read Set, Match on AO3!

When Peter woke up the next day, he scrambled out of the bed as fast as he could, scaring Tony awake too. Memories of the night before flooded back, shading Peter’s face a bright hue of red. He hid in the bathroom for an hour. His reflection in the mirror couldn’t stop staring back at him and he had to take an ice-cold shower, hangover be damned. When he finally gained the courage to walk back out again, Tony had already left for breakfast. Peter joined Tony and his friends but opted to only give them a polite greeting. He kept quiet for the entirety of the breakfast and he was quietly thankful no one brought up his… loose lips. For lack of a better word. That day they all went up on the mountain together. The perks of skiing and snowboarding were that you didn’t really have to talk with anyone. Just wait up for each other a bit further down. And since Peter was often last to catch up, the others would be ready to leave again. It did mean it was absolutely exhausting for Peter. Where the others would get a short break every now and then, Peter had to keep going in one big breath. He wouldn’t even dare to dream to keep up with Harry. The way he went down the slopes was impressive. He took jumps, went off-piste for little bits, and if the slope split in red and black, Harry would always take the black, steep pistes. Lunch at Seppi’s was the greatest reward Peter could’ve ever gotten. He was burning calories at a rapid pace and it didn’t matter how fit he was, his legs hurt and his stomach was growling with the need to be filled. He devoured the Kaiserschmarren like it was his last meal on earth. He even ended up helping Harry down the last of his gigantic plate of spaghetti. Occasionally, he hid behind Harry when some other people would recognize Tony and ask for a photograph. Peter was honestly glad Harry was part of the group. Having someone his age around meant he could talk about stupid, inconsequential things. Like memes. After a while of having his full attention on Harry, Peter felt a warm hand envelop his shoulder. He turned around only to meet Tony’s gaze. The look on his face was tight. Worried… Jealous? “You look tired.” It was a simple comment, yet it somehow held a massive amount of gravity. The man had kept his voice down and Harry already turned to answer his father’s question. One that Peter didn’t hear now that Tony was suddenly so close to him. Peter’s shoulders fell and he scoffed with a nod, avoiding eye contact by staring at his empty plate. “It’s hard to keep up.” “You’re doing incredible for a first time on the mountains, you know that right?” Peter felt Tony’s hand squeeze and pull, urging Peter to look his boss back in the eye. Tony nodded once, the expression on his face a serious one. “Right?” He repeated. Peter managed to smile slightly. He didn’t know what to think of Stark’s piercing eyes resting on him. No, shooting right through him. “Right.” Peter’s reply was breathless and his eyes flicked down to watch how Tony licked his lips, feeling his own part to mindlessly mirror Tony’s movement. Peter blinked twice and shuffled away, forcing his eyes on the drink in front of him. He barely caught Tony’s little smirk. “I think Pete’s done for the day,” Tony said, louder, at the group. “What?” Peter’s eyebrows raised. “Come on, kid, anybody can tell you’re exhausted. It’s okay to take the afternoon off.” Tony patted Peter’s shoulder before smugly leaning back in his seat. If those ski shoes weren’t that chunky and heavy, Peter was sure the man would’ve crossed his legs, resting his ankle on his knee. “Fine, fine-” Peter sighed. “I need a nap. I’ll take the afternoon off if you promise you go spend time with your friends. Not me.” “Deal,” Tony replied quickly, causing Pepper to let out a soft snort. “He’s lying,” she chuckled. Peter rolled his eyes and sighed. “I know.” … Peter and Tony made their way to the Dorfbahn after lunch so they could have a nice walk back to the hotel. Tony arranged for their ski gear to be brought to the hotel by an employee of the gondola. The employee wasn’t very keen at first, but when Tony offered him a - likely too - generous amount of money, the refusal turned to agreement. Peter and Tony casually strolled over the forest path on the other side of the river, towards the hotel. When they were almost halfway, Peter finally found the courage to say something. Though, he did quite enjoy the silence he spent with Tony. The man somehow had something calming about him. It was almost tranquil. Still, things would have to be addressed anyways. Better get it over with fast. “I’m sorry about yesterday, I-” “Oh, you remember?” Tony looked at him surprised and Peter decided to just keep staring at his gigantic moon boots kicking through the snowy paths. “You thought I didn’t?” “You were quite drunk, Parker.” Tony let out a soft laugh and Peter sucked at his teeth with frustration. He should’ve just not said anything. “I… gotta say I was a little scared you thought I’d taken advantage of you when you ran off into the bathroom.” “But you didn’t.” Peter hid his nose behind his shawl and raised his shoulders. “I didn’t.” Tony stretched out, taking a big breath and watching the air condense in front of his mouth. “I’m better than that.” After a few more steps Peter felt like jumping into the rough river rushing next to them when Tony continued talking. “Did you mean it?” “Mean what?” It was a futile attempt at postponing his answer. In reality, it made it even harder to answer what Tony said next. “That you would like me to overwhelm you?” Tony said it so casually, it ached Peter. “Call me, y’know. That.” They both knew what Tony was talking about. Yet, it didn’t matter whether he addressed it like this or if he would’ve just said the actual word. It was still incredibly embarrassing. “I was drunk.” His voice is weak. Unreliable. “Very much so.” Tony put his hands in his pockets and rolled his shoulders, looking up at the clear sky. “People say things without a filter when they are, though.” “Well, I…” Peter didn’t have the right words to counter Tony’s. His brain couldn’t think of anything to defend himself, actually. “You’re using that very filter right now.” That was enough. Peter quickened his pace, overtaking Tony and leaving the man behind him. Stunned. “Hey!” Tony chased after him and grabbed Peter’s shoulder, forcing him to stop and turn around. Peter hated himself for feeling his eyes water. He hated how Tony noticed and seemed worried. He hated this… Strange feeling in the bottom of his stomach. Whatever it was. “It’s okay. If it makes you uncomfortable then we don’t talk about it. It’s all good. You get to sleep in your own bed again tonight.” “What if I don’t want to?” The words left his mouth before he could think them through. Tony’s stunned look shifted to an amazed one. “Then… Then you can stay.” His voice was low, words slow. “Do you want more? More than just sleeping, I mean?” Peter pulled back and hid his face behind his hands. “Yes? No! I don’t know. Not yet. I just-” “I’m gonna stop you right there.” Peter felt two gloved hands pulling down his scarf and cupping his face. He opened his eyes and his gaze met Tony’s. His warm, deep brown eyes captivated Peter immediately. “I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable with me. Or with yourself, or whatever you’re struggling with right now. There’s… Honestly not much I can say or ask of you, especially since you’re here for me, but… would you protect me from my nightmares again tonight?” Peter could only nod slowly. He held his breath. Tony gave Peter an encouraging smile and let his clothed thumbs caress Peter’s jaw. “No funny business. Just two fake boyfriends on a trip to Austria.” The man leaned in with a smirk. “And there was only one bed.” Peter sniffed once and then chuckled, pretending to gasp. “There was only one bed-” Peter repeated, faux-surprised. Tony knew how to break the ice. And he for sure just broke the news to Peter that he knows about fanfiction. And Peter made the mistake of confessing the exact same thing with his reply. “And if you do want to sleep in your own bed, you can go right ahead. No strings attached. No expectations or obligations.” Tony let go of Peter and held out his hand to him. “Deal?” “Are you lying again?” Peter asked cheekily. Tony grinned and waited for Peter to shake his hand. “This time? Definitely not.” Peter smiled up at his boss and nodded, wrapping his fingers around Tony’s palm and giving him one firm handshake. “Then deal.” … The next two days flew by. Peter had permanently moved into Tony’s room… Their room. And it felt right, sleeping next to him. The man had this natural warmth about him that got Peter through the night more easily and Tony admitted he slept better with Peter by his side as well. It was strange. They still weren’t actually together, but it all blended so easily. Peter didn’t even feel like he was acting at the dinner table anymore. He was having fun. With Tony. They talked until late at night about all kinds of things. Fears and dreams. Childhoods and futures. Being over halfway through this vacation felt like a weight on Peter’s shoulders. There was always this lurking fear that Tony would drop him right after the vacation, like he promised he would. Was this a promise he intended to keep? Or would Tony have changed his mind? Just like Peter did? He wasn’t sure. It was the day of the big celebration gala. The Charity Event. February 14th. Valentine’s Day. The party was planned for the evening and Tony had his sights set on a full day of relaxation for both of them. After visiting the hotel saunas, Tony had booked a couple’s massage session. Peter had never gotten a massage in his life before and he was looking forward to it. His muscles needed a break after skiing every day and he couldn’t imagine anything better than spending a relaxed afternoon in the hotel spa, especially since Tony was going to be with him. All the massage tables were empty because everyone was up on the mountains, and Peter was thrilled to be alone with Tony and their masseuses, savoring the moment of silence. Peter did his best not to stare at the billionaire, dressed only in a thin towel, but he couldn’t stop himself from getting a small glimpse. Tony’s body was amazing, muscular and strong, unbelievably fit for a person his age, and Peter had to stop himself from drooling. They were in a public space, no time for an inappropriate boner. When they finally laid on their stomachs, Peter could relax. His face was turned towards Tony and he could see how the other man smiled when he was looking at Peter. He felt calm, enjoying the time he could spend with the billionaire. The hands on his back did wonders for his muscles, kneading his flesh and working every knot out of his body. He felt loose, all the tension leaving him, and his eyes fell shut. The masseuse did excellent work, finding every spot that hurt and treating it until Peter was a puddle of goo. When she worked at a particularly tense spot, digging her fingers in until his muscles finally relaxed, Peter couldn’t stop a loud moan. It echoed across the room, too loud to go unnoticed. Peter died in embarrassment. His eyes open, looking directly into Tony’s and he could see a feral look in his eyes. His pupils were dilated, staring at Peter like how a predator stares at his prey and Peter had never seen such raw hunger on his face before. The look made him clench, his mind providing him with pictures of Tony massaging him, wandering lower and lower until… He stopped his own thoughts and shuddered, struggling with a mixture of arousal and embarrassment, that was highly inappropriate in the situation. “I’m sorry.” He didn’t even know to whom he was apologizing, but he could feel himself blush, turning his head away from the billionaire. “Don't be embarrassed, I know it feels good.” Tony’s voice was filled with understanding and something else, something darker. "M-m sorry, I can't hold back-" "Don't worry.” The masseuse destroyed the mood and Peter wasn’t sure if he should feel relieved or disappointed. “Happens to everyone. Feels good when the muscles finally relax.” Yeah, it did, but it felt even better when a certain billionaire was looking at him like he wanted to eat him alive afterward. There was no way he could survive this vacation without jumping him. Peter was screwed. With each passing day, with each flirtatious smile, his self-restraint was crumbling more, and it was only a matter of time until he would give in. Peter tried not to look at Tony during the rest of the massage, kept his eyes closed and focused on controlling his body’s reaction. He was worked up; every sound of the billionaire made him struggle. When the massage was finally over, he didn’t even know anymore whether he was relaxed or even more tense. He just wanted to go to their room and take a long cold shower. One more touch, one more word, and Peter would break. … “Stunning as always,” Tony mumbled as he stood behind Peter once again. The young man was staring at his reflection in the mirror like he did before, but this time he did hear Tony creeping up on him. “Thank you.” It wasn’t more than a whisper. Peter’s eyes shifted to Tony’s in the mirror. His gaze was intense. They’ve been in this exact position before and it has Peter quietly wonder where this was headed. “I haven’t changed yet, though.” Peter was wearing the simplest clothes. A pair of sweats and a plain white T-shirt. He figured that was the most comfortable to wear for the few hours of downtime he had in the hotel room. Peter found out he actually liked studying himself in the mirror. How the lines of his body flowed and changed with his movement. He used to be unsure what to think of vain people. That it’s shallow to ogle at yourself that long; to like yourself and the way you look. But now that it was Tony’s clothes that were hugging his body, he caught himself staring at his reflection more often than not. “Maybe that’s why…” Tony sighed his reply as he pressed himself into Peter’s space more. No touching yet. “May I?” Peter released a shaky breath that he didn’t even know he was holding. He nodded slightly, allowing Tony to press against him. His body was warm and pleasant and Peter felt himself melt under Tony’s touch when his arm creeped around Peter’s waist to hold him tight. Peter’s jaw tensed when he felt Tony’s hard on. Was this actually happening? Tony’s beard scratched the skin of Peter’s neck as he gently rubbed his chin back and forth. They kept their gazes locked together as they felt the tension rise. Their pupils dilated more and more at the realization that things might escalate sooner rather than later. “More?” Tony whispered into Peter’s ear, confirming Peter’s thought process. Goosebumps spread over Peter’s entire body and he shivered. Yes. Yes, he wanted more. More than anything. He nodded again and Tony hummed disapprovingly. “Tell me you want more. I want to hear you.” “Please,” Peter gasped quietly. “More?” Tony hummed again, a little louder this time. The sound vibrated through Peter’s body and went straight to his cock, which was already visibly growing harder in the sweats. The mirror left nothing to the imagination. Neither did the sweatpants. Peter couldn’t contain a soft moan when Tony’s rough beard was replaced with soft lips. Tony’s grip on Peter tightened and he squeezed into Peter’s skin through the white shirt. “So good,” Tony whispered, suckling at Peter’s neck. “So pretty...” That did it. Tony broke Peter. Peter ripped himself free from Tony’s tight arms and turned around to jump him. He pressed their lips together and wrapped his legs around Tony’s waist. The man immediately grabbed Peter’s ass to push the two of them flush together and he stumbled back to sit them down on the bed. Peter ground himself down into Tony’s crotch and moaned audibly when Tony’s tongue entered his mouth. The billionaire’s strong hands helped Peter rub against him, squeezing the student’s ass in the process. Peter whimpered and whined and moaned and he pressed his eyes shut with embarrassment. “I- I can’t hold back-” He heard himself say, thoughts hazy, repeating what he had said during the massage session earlier that day. “Don’t.” The word shot through Peter like a missile. The filthiest noise he’d ever made, escaped his lips, straight into Tony’s mouth. The man groaned back and grinned. “Jesus, kid, you’re perfect-” Peter’s fingers tangled in and pulled at Tony’s hair. “For you,” Peter gasped between kisses. “Wanna be perfect for you-” Suddenly, Tony pulled back and stared at Peter wide-eyed. There was a crooked, open-mouthed smile on his face, eyes filled with wonder and amazement, as if he couldn’t believe this was happening. That this was real. Peter felt the same. “Well, then…” Tony’s voice was low and dark. Hot. “I got something for you.” He pushed his hips up, making Peter moan again and press back down. It felt so good. He whined softly when Tony stood them up, placing Peter’s feet on the floor. Peter felt dizzy with pleasure as the man guided him to the living space, hand resting on his lower back as he did all those days before when they pretended to be together. Were they still pretending? Peter wasn’t sure, though, he also wasn’t sure if he cared about that right now. There was a flat, white box on the coffee table. A deep red ribbon held the box and the lid together. “I-” Tony stuttered, which surprised Peter. The man never seemed shy, yet now… “I bought it the night you got drunk.” Tony took a slow breath in through his nose and Peter could literally feel the arousal drip from Tony’s words. “I wasn’t sure about the size, but given that I’ve already bought you so many clothes, I’m guessing I got it right.” Peter turned his head to look up at Tony with big eyes. Tony smiled down at him and patted Peter’s ass twice, causing the young man to buck his hips and whimper. “Go on, open it.” Peter hated walking away from Tony’s warmth, but he complied anyway. He shuffled towards the table, swaying his hips a little more than necessary for Tony to stare at as he went. His fingers curled around the sturdy material and he lifted it, looking back at Tony for reassurance. The man smiled kindly and nodded once. Right as Peter lifted the ribbon to pull it loose, there was a sudden knock on the door. Both men were startled, but one quick glance at the clock on the wall had Tony swear under his breath. “The stylist is here,” he huffed, heading for the door. He pivoted on his feet to give Peter one last look. He nodded at the box. “Do with that as you please. We gotta get ready.” Tony left Peter in the living space by himself, dumbfounded and horny, gift in his hands. Did… Did that just happen? When he realized what almost went down if they didn’t have that stupid gala to go to tonight, he yelped quietly. With the white box still in his hands, he hit himself in the head two or three times before pressing it against his forehead. He opened his eyes when he heard the contents shuffle inside. Peter took a slow deep breath in and only half paid attention to Tony talking to the stylist in the hallway. He then made a break for it, rushing into the room that used to be his at the beginning of the week to open Tony’s gift and see what’s inside. … Peter was buzzing with excitement when he walked through the crowd of the Stark Charity Gala, Tony right beside him. He could feel the hand of the billionaire pressed against his lower back, could feel his warmth through the layers of fabric. It would be a lie to say he had calmed down since the little make-out session, Peter could still feel the lingering arousal in his body. He was overly aware of Tony’s presence, overly aware of the lingerie he wore under his expensive suit. Being shown off by Tony, dressed in clothes the billionaire had picked out for him. It made Peter feel owned and cherished, a heady feeling that made him a little dizzy. “You look beautiful, baby,” Tony whispered into his ear, his lips slightly grazing against his skin. One look in the billionaire’s eyes was enough for him to see the hunger, to understand Tony was as riled up as he had been the entire evening. The word ‘Daddy’ was on the tip of his tongue. He wanted to shout it, wanted to scream it while he was getting fucked by the billionaire, but he swallowed it down at the last second. He blushed in shame when he realized how close he had been to saying it out loud. “God, sweetheart, you are teasing me,” Tony growled softly, his hand tightening against Peter’s back. The billionaire’s voice gave away how turned on he was, although his face remained blank, a fake smile for all the guests. “When I bought you the lingerie, I thought you would wear it for me, not everyone else in the room. Baby, you make me a little jealous.” Peter stared at him with wide eyes. How did he know? He had changed into the set when he was in the bathroom. “Oh, Pete,” Tony’s chuckle vibrated through his body. “I can see it through your shirt. It’s not really clever to wear black lingerie under a white button-down.” Peter’s gaze wandered lower, fixed on the light gleam of black which was visible under his shirt. Suddenly, he felt himself getting hot, felt how all his blood rushed to his face in humiliation. He hadn’t thought about it and now not only Tony but a hundred people, no, a hundred strangers, would see him in lingerie as well. “Don’t worry, I’m just teasing,” Tony reacted immediately as he saw Peter’s discomfort. “Nobody is going to think it’s lingerie, could be an undershirt as well.” Peter was still skeptical, but he relaxed a little. Tony was probably right, there was no reason to panic. “Tony,” a cheerful voice stopped his misery and a man in a military suit approached them. “Long time no see.” Immediately, Tony’s fake smile turned into a real one. “Rhodes, how are you? Glad, you could make it. Can I introduce you to my boyfriend? Peter, this is Colonel Rhodey, my best friend.” “Nice to meet you.” Peter shook his hand; glad they were meeting a friendly face for once. “How come I heard about your relationship from the media and not yourself?” Rhodey tried to look stern but failed. Tony saved himself in his usual joking way. “Maybe I just didn’t want you to scare him away. Peter is a keeper.” He pulled Peter tighter against his side and the student felt himself blushing. Again. Soon, Tony and Rhodey were absorbed in their own world, trading stories from when they were younger, and Peter retreated himself. He liked the Colonel, liked listening to him, but he wanted to give these two men some time alone to catch up. Peter excused himself with a smile, giving the billionaire a quick peek on the left cheek before he disappeared into the crowd, looking for familiar faces. Eventually, he found Pepper and his husband. Pepper and Marcus were greeting him with a hug. “Hey Peter, you met Rhodey yet?” Marcus handed him a glass of champagne that tasted quite nice. “Uh yes, Tony is actually chatting with him right now.” The blonde woman laughed loudly. “Oh boy, you won’t see either of them for the next hour. They can’t be separated once they didn’t see themselves for a few days. Joint at the hip.” Peter chuckled slightly, but he didn’t care. Tony was a good man. He deserved to have good friends and if that means leaving him alone for a few minutes, Peter would gladly do so. “So, tell me, how do you like Austria?” “It’s amazing. The landscape, the hotel, even the food. Have you ever tried homemade spaetzle before?” Apparently, Pepper had because they spent the next half an hour talking about food and Austria, and even though Peter had to pretend to be Tony’s boyfriend, it had never felt as real as it did right now. He relaxed, less afraid to screw something up, and for the first time, he could truly enjoy spending time with Tony’s friends. A few minutes later, Rhodey joined them. “Where did you leave Tony?” Pepper asked jokingly. “Was someone able to separate you two?” For a second, the Colonel pretended to sulk before he grinned at the woman. “No, he had to do his duty. Talk to some guests, convince them to donate. It’s still a charity event, Peps.” “I’m going to look for him.” Peter downed the rest of his champagne and placed the empty glass on the table. “Can’t let him walk around alone before someone might snatch him away.” He winked and earned some laughter while he turned around and searched for Tony. It took him a few minutes until he found his boyfriend and when he did, Peter froze. He had imagined a couple of scenarios. Tony flirting with an old lady, convincing her to donate a part of her fortune, Tony joking with some golfer friends or even Tony arguing with someone who didn’t respect the LGBT+ community as equal. However, Peter was confronted with a woman instead, a woman who was clinging at Tony, her arms wrapped around his biceps and he could see the billionaire smile. His boyfriend. No, his fake boyfriend. Peter could feel tears rising in his eyes and he clenched his fists out of anger. His nails pressed down into his skin, leaving marks on his palms, but he didn’t care. It hurt. He watched how she was flirting with him, how he was smiling and not pushing her away. Everyone could see them, everyone could see that she was touching his boyfriend, fake or not. Pain mixed with humiliation and he could see a few pitiful looks from the crowd fixed on them. Peter imagined he could hear their thoughts. “Poor boy could only keep him for a few months. Of course, a college boy from Queens couldn’t tame a billionaire.” The first tear spilled over, running down his cheeks. He could see her leaning over to Tony, her gaze fixed over the billionaire’s shoulder, looking directly into Peter’s eyes. He didn’t want to give her the satisfaction of seeing him break down, but he couldn’t stop the tears either. He felt a hand on his back, could hear Pepper’s voice in his ears, even though he couldn’t process a single word she said to him. The woman who had been flirting with Tony smiled at him, crude and hateful, before she placed her hands on Tony’s chest and pressed a kiss against the billionaires lips. Peter’s world stopped. He felt numb, his blood rushed through his veins and his heart pumped faster and faster. His whole body started to tremble, and the last barrier broke, hot tears spilling from his eyes. Peter wanted to run away, wanted to hide somewhere safe, preferably in his bed at home. He waited a second, wanted Tony to move, to push her away, but the billionaire wasn’t doing either of it. God, it hurt. He couldn’t take it anymore. Peter turned around, fighting his way out of the room, the pitiful faces blurring in his vision. He couldn’t hear Pepper crying out Tony’s name, couldn’t hear Tony crying out Peter’s name, the laughter of the woman ringing in his ears. The only thing he could focus on was how to get back to their room, to pack his things and fly back home, even if it meant spending all of his money on a ticket. When the door of the gala hall closed behind him and the voices were dulled by the wall, Peter broke down completely, sobbing while he climbed up the stairs that led to the penthouse. His steps were quick but uncalculated. He nearly tripped a few times, but he didn’t care. His clothes felt heavy on his body. No. Not his clothes. Tony’s clothes. He wanted nothing more than to rip them off his body.

[anony-mony-moose]

Let’s Stay Together - Izzy Stradlin x Reader (Part 1)

After a particularly crappy few weeks, Y/N manages to lose both her job and her apartment. She's generally known as a bit of a mess, but still struggles to accept help - even when it's being offered by the lovely Izzy. OR a couple of unfortunate events result in Izzy's pal (with occasional benefits) becoming Izzy's gal

look out for swearing and drug use

also on ao3 :)

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I rapped on the metal door quickly and stretched out a yawn. I was exhausted. Last night’s party had carried on into this morning, and then this afternoon, (which seemed to be happening a lot lately) and I’d gone straight from there to work so I was yet to get some sleep. I propped myself up against the wall and waited for somebody to answer, fighting to keep my eyes open.

The door swung open and I jumped up, blinking, to see Angus sticking his head out enthusiastically.

“Hey Y/N! Long time no see! I’ll go grab him for you.”

The door clanged shut just as quickly as it had opened, and I rubbed my forehead, yawning lazily again. There was a muffled yell inside, before the door opened and Izzy sauntered out.

He grinned when he saw me. His hands were busy digging around in the pocket of his apron.

“Hey man, how’s it goin’?” His hand finally emerged with a joint and he popped it between his lips. “Thought you had work today?” He mumbled.

I made a face and tossed him a pack of matches. “Just got canned.”

He raised his eyebrows. “No fuckin’ way.” He sparked up and blew out a long stream of smoke, the sunlight making him squint as he passed them back to me. “Man, that sucks. What happened?”

I stretched tiredly and accepted the joint, taking a drag and holding it for a second. My head was aching something awful.

I exhaled slowly. “Apparently, I was lucky enough to find the only club in fuckin’ LA that actually minds it’s employees getting high in the back room.”

He burst out laughing, “Right, real bad luck. Totally outta your control.”

I grinned and sidled over to lean against the wall next to him, taking another quick drag before passing it back. There was always something strangely comforting about talking to Izzy – even when he was teasing me.

“Well come on, it’s not like I was doin’ it on the fuckin’ bar.”

“Yeah, that’s true. You already tried that at Angelica’s, didn’t work out too good for you did it?” He glanced at me with a sly smirk on his stupid face.

I rolled my eyes and pressed my lips together, trying and failing to look annoyed.

“You are such a prick, Izzy.”

“Oh yeah?” He chuckled, blowing smoke out again.

“I come here for a bit of reassurance, maybe a little pat on the arm, it’s all gonna be alright Y/N, don’t worry Y/N!” I grumbled jokingly, a smile still plastered to my face, “What do I get as soon as I arrive? Oh, here Y/N, here is a list of all the other jobs you’ve lost! What, sympathy? Never heard of it.”

He laughed and pulled me towards him with an arm around my shoulders. “Aw honey, you want me give you some sympathy?”

I grinned and shoved him away. “I’m upset, okay!”

“Yeah, you look pretty distressed.”

“Yeah, ‘cause I am!”

He snickered for a second, before stepping closer again and frowning slightly.

“You kinda look like shit, actually.”

I hummed and let my head fall back against the wall with a thud, closing my eyes gently. “Coming down from last night.”

I heard him step towards me again so, dozily, I opened my eyes. “My break’s over. I gotta go back to work, you know, to my job.” He murmured. I rolled my eyes and punched his shoulder. He just smirked at me, took one last quick drag of the joint and held it up to me. “You can finish that, if you’re not too upset.” I narrowed my eyes at him playfully and took it.

“Thanks, dickhead.” I grumbled.

He laughed and turned back towards the door, before stopping. “Hey, what did you come by for anyway?”

I frowned for a second before my brain kicked back into action. “Oh right, yeah. D’you mind if I sleep at yours for a couple hours?”

He raised his eyebrows. “Now?”

“Uh, yeah if that’s alright.”

He frowned slightly but was already rooting around in his jean pockets. “Sure, that’s fine.” He fished out a set of keys and threw them to me.

Catching them, I pushed myself away from the wall and tried to think of a fast excuse. “Can’t be bothered walking all the way back to mine.”

“Seriously, it’s fine.” He yanked the door open then turned back to me again, smirking. “I’ll see ya when I get home, honey.”

I grinned sleepily and waved. “Have a good time at work, sweetheart!” He winked at me, then disappeared inside as the door fell shut.

*****

Someone was trying to break down the door. At least, that was what it sounded like. I groaned and rolled over to plant my face in the pillow. Instead, I was met with something scratchy and- I scrunched my face up and blinked my eyes open. Carpet. The thumping outside was still going on, and someone was shouting now.

Where the fuck was I?

“Y/N, open the damn door!”

Shit, I thought sleepily, that’ll be the landlord. How late was I on rent this time? Too late to go back to sleep and deal with it later?

I sat bolt upright. Shit. No rent. Angry landlord. No apartment. My eyes focused and I realised that this couldn’t be my place.

“Y/N, for fuck’s sake!” The banging started again.

I rubbed my forehead and clambered to my feet. I was at Izzy’s – and now I was awake, that clearly sounded like Izzy’s voice shouting outside. I shuffled over to the door. He probably didn’t have a spare key, poor bloke. I hoped he hadn’t been waiting for too long.

I slipped the chain from the door and yanked it open, moving to the side so he could come in.

“Took you long enough. Thought you fuckin’ died or somethin’.” He slinked in past me and smiled, shrugging off his jacket. “Have a good nap?”

I hummed. “Haven’t slept like that in ages. Out like a fuckin’ light, soon as I got here.” He dumped the jacket on the counter and pulled a bottle of whiskey from the paper bag in his hand. “How was work, darling?”

He snorted and took a swig. “It was great. When’s dinner?”

“Think you might be drinkin’ it.”

He smirked and offered the bottle to me, striding over to sort through the jumble of clothes in the corner of the room. I had a few gulps as I followed him and sat down on the bed (well, a mattress on the floor), watching him fish something out of the pile. He started pulling off his work shirt as he talked.

“You’re comin’ out tonight, right?”

I nodded and leaned back on my elbows, rubbing my back a little. I hated sleeping on the floor. I hadn’t had to do that sober in a long time. I had another drink. “What’s happening?”

He slipped on a white button up, half unbuttoned of course, and reached out for the bottle. “Well, I was meant to be meetin’ the guys right about now. Couldn’t get into my apartment though.”

I smirked. “Shit, that’s unfortunate.”

“Yeah, some asshole locked me out.” He raised his eyebrows in a challenge as he wandered past me to pick up his jacket again, but stopped and did a bit of a double-take when he passed my own jacket balled up on the floor. “Did you sleep on my floor?”

I cocked my head to the side. “Uh… Is that a problem?”

He bent down to pick it up and handed it to me with an amused, slightly puzzled look on his face. “Well, there is a bed right there Y/N.”

“Right. Thought it might be a bit weird for you to come home and find me, you know… Asleep in your bed.” Obviously I’d woken up in his bed before, but that was only ever the morning after. Plus, he was there too. It felt a little different doing that sober, and without him even present in the apartment.

He just laughed, and went to get his coat on. “You can sleep in my bed Y/N.”

I smirked and dove a hand into my pocket for his keys. “Well thanks Iz,” I said, swinging them from my finger. “I’ll remember that for next time, shall I?”

*****

“Honestly, I’m fine about the whole thing.” I yelled, turning towards Duff’s ear so he could hear me over whatever crap the club was playing. “I deserved it.”

He pulled an exaggerated frown and grabbed my arm earnestly, making sure I was paying attention as he yelled back. “Yeah, well they didn’t deserve you.”

I laughed through another gulp of beer and slid back against the seat to avoid falling off it, his hand dropping away. “Too fuckin’ right! I’m an independent woman who don’t need no job.”

He started cackling and slumped back too, mostly onto me. We’d ended up squished shoulder to shoulder in middle of a packed little booth, everybody pushed closer together as more and more people joined our group for the night. I was sat pressed up between him and Slash, with the latter’s right arm wedged behind my lower back, and somebody else’s boot-clad feet resting like lead weights on my thighs – I suspected they were Axl’s, the cheeky fucker.

I hadn’t really meant to tell the others about getting fired. There seemed no point; jobs came and went with me (okay, mainly went) fast enough that by the time everybody knew I had one, I’d usually already have lost it. By this time next week, I’d be losing another one.

Duff had eked it out of me though, plying me with plenty of booze and no shortage of teasing. It was pretty much impossible to keep things from Duff. Persuasive bassists aside, however, one thing I was determined to keep to myself was the apartment thing. Actually, even thinking about it was probably dangerous, I realised. I really was quite drunk. At this point in any night, there was often a large risk of cats-getting-out-of-bags if I didn’t keep my wits about me. Probably best to stay away from Duff altogether, now I thought about it.

I downed the last dregs of my drink and heaved myself upright, shoving Axl’s feet off my lap. “Another round?” I shouted to Duff, waggling my empty glass in front of him.

He frowned again, this time genuinely. “I’ll get ‘em.” Then, seeing I was serious, “You just lost your fuckin’ job, you can’t buy my fuckin’ drinks right now!”

He started shifting to get up and I laughed, trying to shove him back down. He grinned up at me and slurred, “Come on, don’t be a bitch! You’re not buying my fuckin’ drink.”

“You’ve been gettin’ my drinks all night!”

He rolled his eyes in exasperation. “Yes, and I have a fucking job Y/L/N!”

I laughed, “Good for you McKagan! You want beer or vodka?”

He collapsed back against the seat, casting his eyes heavenward. “I don’t know how I put up with you.” He glanced back up at me a little cheekily. “Beer, please.”

I giggled and nodded, then started climbing out of the booth, picking up drink orders as I went. I made it halfway to the bar when I heard someone calling me.

I pivoted round and beamed as I saw Izzy sidling up through the throng of Wednesday night drunks, raising his hand in a lazy wave. There was a bright red light shining from somewhere to the left, casting a warm glow over his face, chiselling out shadows across his cheekbones and nose. I had a tendency to forget how gorgeous he was when I was sober. But seeing him now… I watched him make his way over, shoulders swinging with one hand buried in his pockets, his other playing with a unlit cigarette.

“I’m just gettin’ more drinks.” I announced as he reached me and slotted the cig behind his ear. His forehead scrunched up as he listened – and had he always done that? It looked ridiculously sweet as he did it then.

“What?” He stepped closer and slung an arm round my waist, angling his head closer to mine.

“Drinks!” I shouted, feeling stupidly delighted at his hand splayed over my stomach. His chest was warm against my arm and when he nodded, I could feel the brush of his hair on my temple. He started leading me forward to the bar, weaving between the other patrons.

The nearer we got the louder it became, with everybody crammed in trying to place their orders, and Izzy had to slip behind me so I could worm my way through the crowd. Now he was pressed against my back, his arms locked in a tight circle around my waist. So we’re doing this tonight, I thought.

“You okay?”

I jumped a little bit as he spoke, his mouth on my ear, hot breath fanning over my cheek and I felt more than heard him chuckling.

“Forget I was here?”

I leaned back into him slightly, and smiled at the way he stooped down to give me his ear when I turned to reply. “Like that’s possible with these latched onto me.” I tapped his forearm, still flush against my front. “I’m not gonna run away, you know.”

He squeezed my sides and bent down again. “What are we ordering?”

I smirked and pitched forwards to get the bartenders attention, rattling off about ten different drinks as she wrote them down. I twisted round to raise my eyebrows at Izzy, who quickly bent forward to give his order, squishing me up against the bar. His hands slid back to twist me round until I was facing him, and he shifted his forearms to rest against the counter behind me.

I frowned and leaned up to speak to him.

“I didn’t pay?”

“I have a tab.”

I rolled my eyes. “Thought I was gettin’ this round.”

“Yeah, well you don’t have any money.” He smirked, and tacked on, “Or a job.”

My arms folded over my chest, pushing up against his too as he stood so close. “Why does everybody keep fuckin’ sayin’ that.”

“Is it not true?”

I scowled at him, although my head involuntarily bobbing along to the music playing might have dampened the effect. He didn’t appear to be very affected anyway. If anything, he looked like he was trying not to laugh, ducking his head down and pursing his lips.

“So, how come you had to crash at mine today? You lose your job and your apartment?”

Oh great, just what I didn’t want to talk about.

I laughed it off and tried to remember which lie I given him before. (My go-to tactic, nearly 100% successful when sober; unfortunately, less so when drunk.) “I was way too fucked up to make it all the way back to mine this afternoon. Probably woulda got myself lost or somethin’.” I smiled sincerely.

“You looked half fuckin’ dead.”

I grinned and thanked whichever sun was shining down on me in relief. “Fuckin’ felt it.”

His eyes darted up over my shoulder and he nodded at someone. “Drinks are ready, you wanna stay here for a minute?”

“Sure.”

I slipped my hand under his jacket to loop around his back as he stepped closer, reaching around me to grab our drinks. I glanced up, having to crane my neck to meet his eyes, and we swapped smiles as he passed me mine.

“You gonna be able to make rent?” He said, close enough that he didn’t have to shout anymore.

I sighed. Why was he hanging onto this?

“It’s fine Iz, really. Don’t worry about shit like that.”

He rolled his eyes and sipped his drink. “Great, not worried at all. Thanks.”

“This is why I don’t tell you shit.” I muttered, knocking back my beer.

“What, in case I try and help you?” He snarked, leaning forward a touch and setting his glass down. “I always fuckin’ find out anyway.”

I laughed sourly. “Sure you do.”

His brow furrowed, crinkling up his forehead. “What?”

“I got kicked out like, two fuckin’ weeks ago Izzy. I haven’t made rent in months. Didn’t find that one out, did you?”

He blinked. I chewed my lip. Fuck. Was not supposed to let that slip.

What was I saying about cats and bags?

I looked away, but it was difficult when we were pressed so close together. The jostling crowd of people had grown and now there wasn’t room for Izzy to move away, whether he wanted to or not. My hand slipped away from his back and I wrapped my arms around myself, swigging my drink. This was not a conversation I had hoped to have tonight.

It wasn’t like I’d been struggling for places to stay, sleeping rough or something – I had enough friends across the city that were happy to put me up for a few nights. And anyway, most of the time I just crashed at whichever party I finished up at. It wasn’t exactly a dire situation. The way I saw it, there was no point in bothering the guys about something so minor.

I had a hunch that that excuse wouldn’t hold up with Izzy though. He released a long-suffering sigh.

“For fucks sake, Y/N.” I sucked my teeth and kept my gaze locked on some couple just past his shoulder. “Why’d you never let me help you out?”

I snorted. “Like you’ve got money to spare on my rent, Iz.”

“I got plenty of money, Y/N/N.” I eyed him sceptically. He huffed and shifted his weight to his other foot, his hip jutting snugly into mine. “So where you been stayin’ for two fuckin’ weeks then?”

“These past few days… You’re not gonna like it.”

“Oh, that’s fine. I’m just lovin’ the rest of this so far.”

I peeked up at him. “You know Nicky Hanson?”

He glared.

“Well…”

“That guy? Really?” He sighed in frustration and dropped his head forward onto my shoulder. “That fuckin’ asshole?”

My arms found their way back round his middle, sliding over the smooth fabric of his shirt, and I pouted. “His apartment’s got hot water. I really value that in a guy.”

I felt him laugh grudgingly, and found myself laughing too.

“I’m sorry I didn’t say anything, it’s just-“ I paused to chuckle. “I mean he has got hot running water. I didn’t see the point in worryin’ you. I was only thinkin’ about your feelin’s Iz.”

He lifted his head, smiling sarcastically. “Well thanks for bein’ so thoughtful, Y/N/N.”

I beamed back at him. “No problem, man. Any time.”

“Just so we’re clear though, you’re stayin’ with me tonight.”

I laughed as his arms folded back around me, drawing me into his chest.

“Can’t take my eye off you for one fuckin’ second, can I?” I bit down a smile as he kissed my forehead.

“We should probably get those drinks back to the table.” I mumbled, not actually bothered if he heard me or not. I burrowed my face into his collarbone, placing an unhurried kiss at the base of his neck.

Yes, I was quite happy to stay right there for the moment.

*****

The mattress dipped somewhere to my right and covers brushed lightly over my back. I opened my eyes reluctantly, screwing my face up against the bright light that streamed in through a crack in the blinds. Izzy’s bare feet treaded carefully past me.

I rolled over, dragging the sheet with me, and watched him hastily shimmy a pair of leather pants up his hips, tiptoeing round as he fastened them. He must have felt my eyes on him because he immediately glanced up.

“What’s goin’ on?” I rasped, fumbling on the floor beside the bed for a cigarette.

“Goin’ to work. You go back to sleep.” He murmured. The room was quiet except for his light footsteps as he hurried to get dressed. I found a cigarette and lit it quickly, squinting at him.

“You’re late?”

He nodded quickly and pulled his work shirt over his head. “Didn’t wanna get outta bed.”

That made me smile. Bundled up cosily under the warm covers right now, I knew just what he meant. I smirked as I followed his hectic movement around the space, finally finding his keys and jacket. “You should probably get a move on.” I teased.

He darted back to the bed to grab a pack of cigarettes, then did one better and snatched mine right from my lips.

“Thanks.” He grinned and dashed away to the door, before I had time to roll my eyes. He jammed his feet into his boots and, turning the key in the lock, whipped the door open. At the last minute, he changed his mind and snapped round to point a finger at me.

“Be here when I get back.”

I smiled widely. “Will do.”

He paused for a second before adding, “And don’t fuckin’ fall asleep.”

I laughed as he bolted through the door, chucking the keys inside for me and slamming it behind him. The walls here were thin enough that I still could hear him as he sped down the corridor, the main door crashing as it fell shut.

I drew a deep breath and sighed contentedly. What to do today?

It was a good feeling – all those hours stretching out in front of me with no work to fill them. That being said, I probably should get on with finding a job straight away, as unappealing as that sounded. Even when I found one, I’d be waiting for at last a week for my first wage before I could put down a deposit on a new flat, and Izzy wouldn’t want me hanging around here for too long. Best to get cracking sooner rather than later.

A knock on the door startled me from my vague planning. I pushed myself to my feet and tugged one of Izzy’s longer shirts from the floor, scanning until I spotted a pair of knickers. I slipped those on too and, rubbing my eyes, traipsed over to the door.

Slash stood swaying slightly on the other side. He smiled when he saw me.

“Hey Y/N/N, how’s it goin’?” He sniffed sleepily and plodded straight in with his guitar in hand, raising an eyebrow at my bare legs. “Oh, I see. Go get it girl!” I snorted and rolled my eyes at him.

He plonked himself down on the bed with a little sigh. “So where is he?”

I dropped down next him and reached for a half-full bottle of wine by his feet. “Literally just left for work, mate.” I had a quick glug before offering it over to him.

“Ah, that sucks.” He muttered, sipping thoughtfully. “Wanted to practise.”

“Well, I’m not great on rhythm guitar, but I do play a mean set of spoons.”

He sniggered and scratched his forehead, having another little sip before giving back the bottle and standing. “You wanna go cop then?”

I grinned up at him and stretched lazily. “You read my fuckin’ mind. Let me find my jeans.”

*****

I breathed deeply and took another long drag of my cigarette, settling my hand back on my stomach. I’d taken off my jeans and retreated back to the bed as soon as we returned, and now found myself drifting blissfully in and out of sleep. Slash was snoring lightly beside me with his legs spread out, dangling over the edge of the mattress.

The afternoon had passed in a slow rush and now the view through the window was dark, fuzzy shadows enveloping the room. I’d been meaning to switch the light on for hours. The bed was just too comfortable to move.

There was a knock at the door, and a weird sense of deja-vu washed over me. Slash grunted idly by my side. They knocked again. Impatient, I thought. I rolled over onto the floor and stood, staggering slightly when my balance wobbled. I ambled over and unlocked the door, leaning against it as I eased it open. Izzy appeared, looking over me with amusement.

“Had a good time?”

I smiled warmly and let my head drop against the doorframe. He chuckled.

“Can I come in, please?”

I hummed and moved backwards, dragging the door with me so he could walk past. He glanced over my shoulder and smirked.

“Shoulda guessed, huh?” I looked behind me and realised Slash was still in the bed, sat up now and jerking awake every couple of seconds. “You save any for me?”

“Some left by the bed, I think.” My voice was croaky, having hardly been used for an hour or two. The door was still wide open so I pushed it til it clicked shut and twisted the key in the lock again.

“Uh, I think we had that already Y/N/N.” Slash piped up finally.

Izzy hummed and stepped behind me, placing his hand on my shoulder. “I got news, by the way.”

I sighed and melted backwards into his chest. “What’s that then?”

“There’s a job goin’ at Andrea’s. Dish washing.”

“I could wash dishes.” I mumbled, eyes gently closing as his fingers grazed up and down my arm.

“You know, I was thinkin’ the same thing.” I could hear the smirk in his voice, the silly git.

“Andrea’s, where you work?”

“Yeah.” He said softly. “Figure that way I can at least try to keep you outta trouble.”

Slash laughed and I joined in, opening my eyes to make a face at him across the room.

“Fuck off.” I mumbled, smiling and starting to wake up. “I’ll go in tomorrow.”

“You wanna get ride with me?” I slipped away reluctantly to turn and face him.

“Yeah, please.” A new job, already. That was the first of my two problems sorted. Bless him, he’d probably been thinking along the same lines as me, about getting into a new place of my own quickly. I’d be out of his hair much sooner now that he’d lined up a job for me.

“I’ll try and keep this one.” I joked, smirking slightly.

Slash tittered again behind me. “Well, they haven’t fired Izzy yet. That’s gotta count for somethin’.”

Izzy rolled his eyes playfully and stalked past me. “I said I’d go meet Duff and Axl. You jerk-offs comin’ or are you just gonna stay here sleepin’ in my bed?”

“Hey!” Slash made a noise of indignation, “Somebody had to keep her company!”

[ifeellikeameowster]

E.V.O.L Chapter 3- Living Dead

Chapter Summary: After a bit of a rough morning, Virgil decides to visit the grave of his long dead best friend... Meanwhile, Patton has finally graduated and is ready to take on his first assignment as a newly appointed cupid!

Warnings: Beginnings of Yandere like behavior, stalking, watching other’s without them knowing, wounds, stabbing, blood.

Pairings: One-sided moxiety.

Word Count: 4k+

Chapter followed by Author’s Note then Tag List under the read more:

Everyday I feel the same.

Stuck, and I can never change.

Sucked into a black balloon.

Spat into an empty room.

The next day Virgil found himself waking before even the roosters themselves would have crowed.

Rubbing the sleep from his eyes and cursing his wishy washy biological clock, he wondered if it was too early to grab a bite of breakfast. He had missed dinner the previous day, after all, having been too tired from being forced to socialize for so long with someone so new. His parents would probably understand if they caught him. They always did.

He shrugged and slung one of his lighter weighted blankets over his shoulders before taking a few shaky steps away from his bed. His legs felt like jello, making it tempting to just go back to the safety of his little nest and spend all day inside of his room. But the obnoxious rumbling of his ungrateful stomach made that nearly impossible. So to the kitchen it was instead.

Virge tried his best not to step on any creaky floorboards on his way out of his room and down the stairs. If his parents weren’t already awake, then he certainly didn’t want to be the loud, fumbling asshole that actually woke them up. Heaven knows they deserved all the rest they could get. They did so much for him. And for the whole neighborhood, for that matter.

Wonder if there’s any of those blueberry bagels left. He pondered as he descended the final step.

He went past the living room and into the kitchen, where upon after he entered, Virgil was immediately met with his answer.

“You’re up early, V.” Talyn said around a mouthful of their buttery bagel, “Can’t sleep?”

“More like slept too much.” Virgil corrected as he joined them at the breakfast bar.

Talyn was a Banshee, a wailing ghost that had the ability to warn others of approaching death.Though, they usually used their glorious screeching voice for the screamo parts of their band’s songs instead. Once in a blue moon however, especially back when Virgil had done something particularly rebellious when he was a teenager, he had had the pleasure of witnessing firsthand the more negative side to their voice. Between his maddy’s booming voice and the sad puppy dog eyes his pops had sent his way-it was easy to see why his version of a ‘rebellious phase’ had been cut short. 

“I’d chastise you for your poor sleeping habits but I’m honestly not one to speak myself.”

“You’re a ghost, you don’t even need to sleep.”

“And yet here we are.” They waved the hand holding the bagel, sending some crumbs flying, “With me taking afternoon naps and staying up all night like a heathen.”

“God, same.”

“We’ve rubbed off on you too much, little one.” Talyn chuckled, putting a hand on his shoulder, “Me and Joan. Why don’t you take after your papa more too?”

“Pops is too sunshiney for me, maddy. I’m half convinced he’s made of literal sunbeams at this point.” Virgil sneered out with a fond undertone as he gently lathered butter on his own bagel, “I’m more of a punk moonchild, ya’ know?”

Maddy was the affectionate nickname he had given Talyn as a kid. He was pleased to later find out that, unlike with dammy, other kids sometimes used maddy for their nonbinary parents too.

His maddy chuckled at that, patted his shoulder, then returned to devouring their own breakfast. They both sat in a comfortable, companionable silence for a while as they finished up their food and took in the morning sights through the wide kitchen window. Then as the birds started up their autumn songs and the sun started it’s slow trek over the horizon, they both got up to put away their trash and tidy their mess. As he was putting his blanket over the couch for later cuddling-while-watching-tv purposes, Virgil’s eyes unfortunately happened to land on the calendar hanging next to the entryway. The sight of a certain circled reminder of a date he had been trying to forget caused a past pain to resurface just as hot and stabbing as the first time it had ever appeared in his heart.

He reentered the kitchen with a familiar, haunting grimace. Talyn sent him a fleeting confused look before it morphed into one of understanding instead.

“It’s next week, isn’t it?” They breathed softly, “The anniversary.” Their tone held an unnecessary weight of guilt. For even though they were a Banshee, they had not been able to foresee that death. The most important one. The one that had hurt their child so much at such a young age.

“Yeah,” Virgil choked out, tears threatening to brim his eyes, “If...I’m being honest...I’m not sure if I can make it, this year.”

“Well maybe…” They bit their lip and shifted on their feet nervously, “Maybe you can just go now? It might be less pressure, if it’s not the day of.”

“I-I don’t know, maddy. I’m still kind of worn out from yesterday.”

“Ah, the matchmaker meeting. I almost forgot about that.” Talyn moved to lean back on the counter, “How did that go?”

Virge sucked in a breath, blinked away the wetness of his eyes, and thanked whatever higher power may be for the change of topic. “Terrible, I hate socializing. Also it felt like I was being hounded by a teacher with how many questions I was being asked.”

“He needs to ask questions, dear. How else would he know what you like?” They sent him a sympathetic smile that didn’t quite meet their eyes. The mood of the room was still soured by the date hanging ominously on the wall. Taunting them both with it’s ever approaching red circle.

“What I would like is to not have to go to these meetings at all.” Virgil whined. He hopped up to sit cross legged on the countertop beside his maddy. “Why’d you and dammy even talk to him anyways? I thought pops was just going through one of his romance craze phases again, but…”

“But, we all agreed it’s what’s best for you. It’s not healthy to only ever hang out with your family. You need to spread your wings, sweet little baby boy.”

“Ew, baby talk.” Virgil mimed throwing up before crossing his arms and pouting. “Why’s it gotta be some stupid dramatically set up romcom though? Can’t I just go to an online group chat for depressed-emos-anonymous or something?”

Talyn did a laugh somewhere between a giggle and a chortle at that. They playfully swiped at his shoulder. “No, you idiot. Just listen to your parents, okay? It’s time. Way past time, actually…”

“Time to what? Get some?”

“Find someone to love. Someone to...give your feelings too.”

“I give mushy lovey dovey stuff to y’all all the time!”

“Not like that, V. To…” They tapped a frustrated rhythm onto the countertop with their long, pointed nails. “To obsess over. To be attracted to and fawn over. Stuff like that.”

“To bone.”

“Virgil!”

“What? That’s the only difference, ain’t it?” He sighed as he leaned over to place his head on their shoulder. “Why can’t platonic love be enough? I've been doing just fine with just that…”

“Honey…” They let out a sigh of their own before running a reassuring hand through his hair. “That may have been enough until now, but trust me you need this.” The soothing touch of their petting almost calmed  him, until- “We need this.” They ended in a strained whisper, yet unfortunately still loud enough for him to hear.

Virgil jolted away from Talyn and off the counter as if he’d been burned. “What? You’re...You’re all trying to pawn me off or something? Finally tired of me being a fucking mooch?”

“No, no- Little one, that’s not what I-”

“Well if I’m such a leech, maybe I will go hang out in the graveyard with the rest of the rotten worms.”

The tears that had pricked at his eyes earlier decided to return, yet once more he held back the flow of the damn. His eyes reddened with the strain of the repression. Still, he refused to cry around others. Weakness was an ugly shade of color to wear. He wanted to toss out all of his flaws from the closet of his inner self and go shopping for better traits. But maybe, he couldn’t help but think...he was the one that needed to be tossed out right along with them.

Got bubble wrap around my heart.

Waiting for my life to start.

But everyday it never comes.

Permanently at square one.

“Tell the others I’ll be at the church.” He snapped instead as he rounded the corner and stomped up the stairs. He no longer cared if he woke anyone else up. His body was brimming with aggravated energy and his mind was swirling with all the possible negative implications of those few simple whispered words.

The day had barely begun and he already had a massive headache.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After having haphazardly thrown on the nearest clean clothes he could find and all but running out of his house and into the nearly empty street, save for a lone old maid that was bird watching on a nearby bench, he began to make his way over to the cemetery.

On his way there he stopped by Fauna's Florals to pick up a small bouquet of soft and pale yellow roses, the flower of friendship, because that's what he had been to him- the truest friend he would probably ever have. Besides his family, of course, though they were kind of obligated to hang out with him. And he was beginning to wonder if even that reliable, familial obligation had started outstaying it’s welcome.

Miss Fauna, having noticed his red rimmed eyes, had given him a sympathetic smile and a pat on his hand as she handed over the bouquet. He shied away from the unwanted contact and thanked her in a small voice. It was the loudest one he could muster at the time.

When it's late at night-ight,

I'm so dissatisfied-ied.

The weight of an empty life-ife,

Will lessen in the moonlight.

In the light,

In the light,-light,-light.

Shooting Star Cemetery was luckily located in the next street over, making it an easy and short walk. Yet not nearly a long enough a walk to clear his head any from the raging storm it currently housed inside. The graves were all well kept and neatly aligned. The landscaping was done with care and sheer professionalism. The overall atmosphere was more bright and welcoming than one would expect a place housing the dead could ever be.

Virgil moved past the groundskeeper with quick steps, not wanting to have to engage in any conversation with the man whose smile always seemed to stretch too far over his face and whose eyes appeared to linger on his form for too long. Especially not today of all days. He thought as the conversation from earlier resurfaced in his mind. Fresh and unwanted.

His feet took him to his destination almost on autopilot. He had been visiting this particular grave at least once a year for almost seventeen years now. Of course it would be practically hardwired into his system at this point.

“Hey, buddy.” He called out wearily as he approached. Virge leaned over to place the bouquet of yellow roses directly in front of the ivory gravestone before stepping back to sit on the grass across from it.

The stone was the lightest of the ones in its row, almost basking it in an ethereal spotlight. The carvings of angels, ribbons, and roses around it’s surface only accentuated the holy glow. In the dead center, carved in looping and elegant cursive writing, was the epitaph.

It read,

“Patton Sangster:

A young Cherub bright and fair,

Taken from this world too soon.

Now he is way up there,

Dancing between the Sun and the Moon.”

Definitely more fancy and vague than most of the epitaphs around here. Virgil mused, Then again Mrs. Songster was always the poetic dreamer type.

While on the other hand, if he had a gravestone, it would probably say something like "Here lies Virgil Spurling: What an idiot" or "Virgil Spurling: Died of Depression and General Dumbassery".

He let out a long sigh and curled his legs underneath him while crossing his arms. “You wouldn’t believe the week I’ve had, Pat.” He began, “I think my parents have lost their ever loving marbles. Don’t get me wrong or anything- I love them a bunch. But I just don’t...I just don’t get why they’re doing this, ya’ know?”

“They’re insisting I see this stupid matchmaking witch doctor guy, who probably thinks I’m a loser by the way-he seemed kinda stuck up and I kept making a fool of myself as per usual. And like they want me to get hitched to some dude ASAP I guess so I can ‘spread my wings’? Whatever the fuck that’s supposed to mean?”

He started waving his arms around to accentuate his ranting, ”But a part of me can’t help but think they’re just trying to get rid of me. Just pawn me off to a random guy so I can be out of their hair! But they...They’ve never said or done anything like that before...They’ve always been so nice to me and so supportive and so loving so I just don’t…”

Now, in the sanctum of this empty cemetery and the equally emptily promised presence of his only friend, he finally let the tears fall quietly and slowly down his ever reddening cheeks. “I just don’t get it anymore, Patton. Nothing makes sense. It hasn’t for a long time now. Ever since...ever since high school, really. And I just…”

“I just wish you were still here.” He hissed into the morning air as he closed his eyes and let his eyes finish emptying themselves so he could hopefully return home with them dry and pretend that they had never been crying in the first place.

From several yards away the groundskeeper stole glances at the strange visitor as he worked his usual surveyal of the grounds. However, his gleaming, unwelcome eyes were not the only pair that happened to be following Virgil that day.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Patton Sangster, newly appointed cupid under Eros, had just finished the last of his angelic training and was lined up with the rest of the lucky graduates about to receive their first heavenly assignments.

Finally! He cheered in his head. A chance to prove that all of his training wasn't for nothing. He may be light hearted, but he certainly wouldn't take his heavenly duties lightly. He would prove without a doubt that being soft hearted didn’t mean he was weak. Far from it in fact. He considered the overflowing love he had in his heart to be his greatest and most cherished source of strength.

Little did the little cupid know just yet, but that unbridled and passionate love of others would soon be his very downfall.

I'm living dead, dead, dead, dead.

Only alive-live-live-live.

When I pretend-tend-tend-tend.

That I have died, died, died, died, died, died.

An elder, more experienced cupid passed back and forth in front of the recruits with a golden clipboard they had summoned. Odiel, patron cupid of dark love ballads, was surprisingly the one giving the assignments to the newbies this year. He listed off each angel and their assignment with a resigned sigh and dramatic flip of the page. He went through many graduates before finally getting to Patton, which had caused the poor angel to bounce nervously on his feet.

"Patton Sangster?"

"Yes, that's me!" He nodded eagerly with a dazzling grin.

"Hm." His superior clicked his tongue before looking at his clipboard. "No official angel name given yet. No patron title earned yet."

Patton's eager expression flickered, a brief frown gracing his features before they turned back into his patton-ted steadfast smile.

"We'll just assign you to your old hometown during life, then. And see where it goes from there."

Patton gasped, bringing his hands up to cup his face. "Heartwish City?!"

Odiel pauses for a moment to check another page on their clipboard. "...Yes."

"Yay! Oh, I can't wait to see everyone again! And help them out!"

"Mhmm. Well, you will have to wait a bit more. There's still orientation to get through."

"Oh, of course." His smile turns more nervous, "Yes, sir."

And with that, the rest of the graduates were assigned before they all headed over to the orientation stadium.

The clouds are thicker and fluffier around the stadium, which is covered in red, pink, and white decorations and gold trimmings. Eros himself stands on a stage floating gently above them. Some of his more well known cupids fly  beside him and his effervescent presence. They give the awaiting crowd reminders of what-to-do's and what-not-to-do's before Eros finally speaks.

"Today is the day you truly become cupids. Go forth and spread love, devotion and admiration wherever you may fly to. Prove your loyalty both to me and to my almighty mother Aphrodite. Be the best angel you can be." He intones in a booming voice accompanied by grand hand gestures. He then bows his head toward the crowd of new cupids in respect and waves them off, officially dismissing them to their new posts.

Patton, having been absolutely jittery with excitement throughout the whole orientation, immediately flaps his small, pink and blue hummingbird like wings and takes off into the early morning sky.

His flight time is shortened by both his familiarity with the destination and his newly appointed status. So much so that to any outside spectator, he would have arrived there in the bat of an eyelash.

As he glided over his old town, he spotted several people he once new. Miss Fauna was putting up a new display in front of her flower shop. Tia and Ana were putting up an ad for their speciality tea of the day. Dr Picani was leaving the Blue Fairy Therapy building while glancing at his watch. And many, many more lovely and well missed faces.

But the one he had missed most of all was currently over at the Shooting Star Cemetery, sitting criss-crossed applesauce right in front of his grave.

Sure, he hadn't seen them in over seventeen years, not since their childhood together. But he would be able to recognize that pale face and protective spirit anywhere! This was his best friend we were talking about, after all. And Patton never took his friendships lightly. So he did a spiraling turn in the air to change directions for this newfound destination. He could worry about his other duties later, he had a dear friend to visit!

He hovered over the cemetery like an excited bee hovering over a group of flowers, staying close to the sparse clouds strewn about the glorious sunrise. Not only had Virgil grown up healthily, but he had even remembered him! And was currently paying respects to his grave, apparently. He leaned forward and focused his hearing on the sounds happening down below him.

"You wouldn't believe the week I've had, Pat." Oh dear, what could have happened? Is whatever it was the reason he was visiting? "I think my parents have lost their ever loving marbles. Don’t get me wrong or anything- I love them a bunch. But I just don’t...I just don’t get why they’re doing this, ya’ know?”

What could they have possibly done? Patton remembered Virgil's parents, three queer platonic partners who had always adored their son. They were loved by the whole neighborhood and Patton himself had also enjoyed their company whenever he had visited Virgil's house for playdates and sleepovers. He couldn't imagine them ever doing anything to harm their beloved child! But, if they had hurt Virgil somehow…

“They’re insisting I see this stupid matchmaking witch doctor guy," Ohhh! A matchmaker, huh? Virgie really had grown up! It seemed like just yesterday the two of them were talking about the other boys possibly having cooties during recess. "Who probably thinks I’m a loser by the way-he seemed kinda stuck up and I kept making a fool of myself as per usual." Well that didn't seem very nice of whoever this matchmaker fellow was. Patton would never think of his assignments as losers...everyone was equally deserving of love after all!

"And like they want me to get hitched to some dude ASAP I guess so I can ‘spread my wings’? Whatever the fuck that’s supposed to mean?” Wait just a minute...Matchmaker...Wings...Patton was a cupid now! Duh. The solution was obvious!

Patton puffed up his chest and fluttered his wings excitedly. He could be Virgil's new, better matchmaker. And nothing would make Pat more happy than having his childhood friend being his first assignment as an official cupid. It was all falling into place so well, almost like destiny! But Virgil was talking again now, so Patton tuned back in.

”But a part of me can’t help but think they’re just trying to get rid of me. Just pawn me off to a random guy so I can be out of their hair! But they...They’ve never said or done anything like that before...They’ve always been so nice to me and so supportive and so loving so I just don’t…”

Ahhh, this was all Virgie's anxiety getting to him again. He had always been a worrywart, even back when they were kids. He guessed some things never changed, not even when it had been so many years. Back then, Patton had always tried to ease his worries and be the most supportive friend he could be. But even at his best and most empathetic, he had been far too young to quite comprehend the full depths of Virgil's emotions.

He looked back at Virgil only to find tears running down his cheeks now, marring his dark eyeshadow. Oh dear sweet Aphrodite- he was crying! “I just don’t get it anymore, Patton. Nothing makes sense. It hasn’t for a long time now. Ever since...ever since high school, really. And I just…”

Highschool? What had happened in high school? Did someone hurt his dearest friend while he wasn't there to protect him? Patton leaned even more forward and gripped the clouds nervously.

“I just wish you were still here.”

Patton froze. Only holy magic and his grip on the clouds keeping him in the air.

I lay back in a glittering mist,

And I, I think of all the men I, I could have kissed.

I haven't lived my life, I haven't lived love,

It's just a bird's eye view from, from up above.

A part of him wished he was still there too. And that same part of him wished he had been there beside Virgil through it all. Had been there in highschool to prevent whatever it was that had hurt his Virgie. Had been there to tell that rude matchmaker off for him. Had been there to give him a lesson in proper etiquette and respect towards his clients. Had been there to help his parents find a better matchmaker. And even to help Virgil pick only the best partner for a great guy like him.

He released a breath he didn't even know he was holding in the first place. But he was here now! And he could help him now!

Now filled to the brim with determination- He hurriedly fumbled to summon his bow and quiver, which he had been storing in his Grace, and pulled out a red romantic arrow from the bag. In his haste, however, he had nicked the side of his arm with the tip of it. He paused to look at the offending wound, wondering if a nick was considered the same thing as a pierce. It wasn't, right? He didn't remember them saying anything about scratches while in the heavenly academy. Oh well, it was probably nothing to worry about! It hadn't come anywhere near his heart, after all.

Besides, Patton had much more pressing matters to attend to. And a heart that needed a connection only he could create was waiting for him. A connection that would transcend the very heavens themselves! Pat would definitely find Virgil a beloved partner that could kiss his many worries away. Many, many kisses. Kisses for that kissable mouth...and soothing voice...and soft looking cheeks…and pale, elegant hands...

Patton shook his head furiously to rid himself of those lucrative thoughts. Sure, Virgil had grown up handsomely, yeah. But this was Patton's best friend he was talking about! How could he be thinking such scandalous and traitorous things? Besides, he had chosen Virgil for his very first assignment. He had to be more professional than that! He had to prove himself a worthy cupid both to Eros himself and to his fellow angels.

He moved to expertly draw his bow, with the same arrow that had previously drawn his blood, poised in the direction of the huddled figure below him. Just as he was about to finally fire, however…He heard it.

"Patton." Just a whisper. A whimper through tears. Just a mumble amidst other unintelligible cries of sorrow.

And yet it felt like a shout. A cry for help. A plea for him. It rang through Patton's ears with the force of a hurricane and knocked him off of his balance.

The arrow cracked and twisted off it's place on the bow and turned to stab through his heart.

He choked on the blood that had bubbled up into his throat and desperately pawed at the arrow lodged accidentally into his most valuable organ.

The words of one of his superior angels and teacher, Balladeil, flared up into his mind. A cupid was not meant to take a cupid's arrow. A cupid's arrow was not made to be used on a cupid.

"Oh Eros!" He cried "Oh no!"

He grabbed at the arrow and started yanking on it. Trying to pull it out of his chest. But it was being stubborn, latching onto his Grace and using that to keep ahold of him. More blood gushed from the wound only to be consumed by his Grace as it tried to heal him from the intrusion. Tears started pouring from Patton's eyes to match Virgil's.

Then, before he knew it, the arrow had melted into his heart and merged into his Grace. And the connection had been completed.

Patton stared dumbfoundedly at the clean space where it used to be for several solid minutes. The wounds were completely healed now and the blood was all gone. It was too late. He had been too late. He had failed.

He took a shaky breath and moved to collect his bow and quiver.

He stored them carefully back into his Grace.

He looked back down at Virgil, who was getting up from the ground now.

He flew slowly over the graveyard as Virgil walked hurriedly past the leering groundskeeper.

He followed Virgil silently all the way back to his home, often passing by a strange crow that happened to be on the same flight path as him.

He watched over Virgil for the rest of the day and way on into that night.

Did I really deserve it?

It happens when you're hurting.

And cut me at the surface,

Of my heart.

Of my heart-heart-heart.

A/N: Patton, you darling idiot. You would have been fine if you weren’t so clumsy. X3 Anyways, hope y’all enjoyed! The next fic I’ll post will be that Creativitwins one shot I mentioned earlier. And then it’ll be right back into the E.V.O.L au! ;3

Tag List:

@accidental-sanders 

@ren-allen

@noneed4thistbh

@virgil-the-void-kitten

@totalwhovian

@bandgeek82002-love

@allycat31415

@notalwaysthevillian

@cloudchaser7

@iamredxd

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@idon-kno

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@nikova-eve

@rebelrewriter

@chaoticpanpastelle

@simreaper98

@adroolingmaw

@corrupt-ink-denials

@all-of-them-sanders

@6-daughter-of-a-witch-6

@angelicakaiba

@blobdad

@bi-sappy

@clara-oswald-333

@friendly-neighborhood-murderer

@randomcrew

@demon-of-sparkles

@transdimentionalapocolypse

@maybe-one-day-i-will-be-okay

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@babybunnyquake

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@screechingflapbiscuitpeach

@hunter-shyreen

@randomfactscenteral

@charlineedstea

@bee-a-queen

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@virgil-is-baby-boi

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@andreaissy

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@im-a-space-gay

@kai-the-person

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

Sleepwalking. Pike was sleep walking. Eyes wide open, skin cold as ice to the touch, barefoot and sleepwalking. Pidge and Hunk had hung back as Keith approached his boyfriend, he’d tried calling out to him thinking Pike was ignoring him when he failed to stop and turn around. He didn’t want to shock Pike into waking by grabbing hold of him, so approached the situation by standing in front of him and letting Pike walk right into his waiting arms. The moment Pike bumped into him, his lover’s legs gave out, Pike slumping against him as the others watched on. Still seemingly asleep, Keith manhandled him up into his hold, Pike’s head lolling back as his eyes slid closed. Keith had to admit that seeing Pike so vacant wasn’t good for his heart. Those big blue eyes seemed empty as they stared straight ahead without seeing a thing. Carrying Pike over to Pidge and Hunk, Hunk automatically moved the blanket around Keith’s shoulders to cover what he could of Pike

“Is he sleeping?”

“Sleepwalking from the looks of it”

“It wasn’t enough that Allura and Shiro had us walking all damn day, now he’s gotta walk off in the middle of the night too”

Pidge was right, he’d failed as boyfriend in keeping Pike safe

“It’s my fault. I was too lenient in not having someone stay up to keep watch”

Hunk patted down some imaginary kink in the blanket, offering him a sad smile as he gazed at his sleeping friend

“It’s not your fault, bud. We didn’t know he was going to wander off like this”

“Still...”

“Keith, Hunk’s right and you know it. We’re just lucky he didn’t get himself into any trouble while sleep walking. I have to say, he did kind of an impressive job getting this far”

Keith wasn’t sure impressive was the right word. Fortunately most of the Quite Plains was flat, without many obstacles for Pike to trip or hurt himself on

“We should head back. He’s freezing”

Pidge stared at Pike a moment longer

“Are you going to tell him?”

“Tell him what?”

“That he was sleep walking?”

Pike would worry. He’d blame himself and be angry over having caused a scene... yet... Pike had been so honest with him that the idea of keeping secrets rubbed him the wrong way

“Not tonight. Hopefully we can make it back in time with causing a fuss, and he’ll sleep through until morning”

That wasn’t a yes, and it wasn’t a no. It was a maybe later and they all knew that

“Alright. Ugh... why’d we have to walk so far? And why did I have to be a dwarf, we’ve only got little legs”

That was Pidge’s way of dealing with the fact she knew full well they’d been lucky. She’d follow Keith’s lead and let him be the one to talk to Pike about it when he was ready too

“You might have little legs, but Keith’s the one who’s gotta carry Pike all the way back”

“I don’t mind”

The response was automatic. Keith really didn’t mind. Carrying Pike meant knowing he was safe. He’d have been a raging mess if his alpha was there to find their omega missing from his designated spot at their side

“Let me know if you need a break. I’ll take him if he gets too heavy”

“Yeah, thanks, man”

That was a lie. Keith wasn’t about to hand Pike over to anyone when he was in such a vulnerable state... or at the best of times really.

Having make the long walk back to camp, Allura and Shiro were awake, waiting for the four of them to return. They’d chatted off and on as they’d followed Hunk’s tracing spell back to the camp, the last hour spent by all of them trying not to fall asleep on their feet. Pike had slept the whole way, Keith felt there should be some kind of limit to how vulnerable once person could be. Ignoring their worried stares, Keith laid Pike down in their bed, covering him up with their blankets and ensuring he was settled before walking over to sit by the camp fire where Hunk and Pidge had already huddled next to each other. Feeling Shiro’s eyes on him, Keith’s mouth did that thing where it moved on it’s own

“Pike went sleepwalking”

“I didn’t say a word”

Shiro didn’t have to

“No, you were watching me, waiting for me to say something instead. Hunk used a tracking spell and we found him still asleep”

“Is he alright? He must have been freezing”

Keith nodded at Allura’s questioning

“Yeah. He passed out when he walked into me. Slept the whole way back to camp too”

“Is that normal?”

Keith could only shrug. Who could call any of this normal?

“I don’t remember Lance sleepwalking before. He didn’t at the Garrison, I would have heard him leaving if he had. Pidge?”

Pidge shook her head at Hunk

“Not that I know. Sometimes on the castle he looked asleep on his feet, but I’ve never seen him actually sleep walking before”

A few long moments of silence passed between the group, Shiro clearing his throat

“Should we talk about this? We’re lucky he wasn’t injured when he walked off”

Keith groaned as he stretched his aching shoulders

“We’ve already talked about it. We’re going to take it in shifts to stay up during the night. If he wakes up, or gets up, they’ll wake me up and I’ll make sure he’s alright”

“Keith...”

Keith didn’t like Shiro’s tone, he already knew what came next

“... we understand that you love him, but you’re not alone in wanting to take care of him. Being a carer is hard. You saw what Adam went through”

“Adam went through all that with you because he loved you. I love Lance. Plus, it’s safer if I’m the one to approach him. He trusts me, and he trusts me to subdue him if he’s out of it enough that he’s a danger”

“I’m worried that...”

“You don’t need to worry. We’ve made it this far. His anxieties would only go into overdrive if he thought he was inconveniencing any of you. That’d set back his confidence to start fixing things between all of us. I’m not trying to be mean, or say that none of you care about him. I’m dealing with what happened while I was away, and this isn’t guilt from that. He’s nervous and he’s jumpy, he’s had a couple of anxiety attacks. Plus the game keeps making him put himself down over the slightest thing. When, and if, you guys can help, I know I can ask you. All I can ask you right now is to let me be the one to bring him out of things like panic attacks or this sleep walking thing”

Things fell silent again, Allura breaking it this time

“I’m worried about him”

“He knows you are. He knows all of you are. But at the same time, he’s strong. Him being strong for so long is why we’re all here now. I’m going to talk to him about tonight when the time is right. For now I think we should all head to bed and start out later tomorrow than we had planned. He must have walked a couple of kilometres tonight...”

Shiro raised an eyebrow

“He got that far”

When Keith nodded his brother followed up with

“Shit”

Pidge giggled, then shuddered, cozying closet to Hunk

“Watch your language”

Shiro covered his face with his hand

“Respect your elders”

“Sure thing, Old Man”

“That’s “Mister Old Man”, to you”

Everyone let out a laugh at Shiro. The mood lightening despite their worries over Lance

“I think Keith is correct. Once you’ve warmed up, it’s time for bed for all of us”

Bed sounded great. Anything to get Lance back in his arms again and his feet out his gritty boots

“I might turn in now. Pike was pretty cold. I don’t want him coming down with something from it”

“Keith, we all know you just wanna cuddle up with your booooyfriend”

“I’d rather cuddle up with him than you”

Pidge faked offence as Keith climbed to his feet. They should have just stayed put out there, then had the others come meet them the following day... other than the fact it was freezing and they’d more than likely have been found frozen to death... Walking. come morning, was going to suck.

*

The “Quite Plains”, quite sucked. Pike’s sleepwalking had left him sluggish. He’d eaten breakfast, then started yawning, continuing to yawn frequently all the way to lunch time, where he conked out mid-meal. One moment he was sitting up, leaning against Keith, the next he was snoring all within the space of what seemed seconds. With Pike too sleepy for conversation Keith hadn’t told him about the night before. Allura noticing he’d fallen asleep with part of his sandwich still in his hand. Agreeing to spend a few more hours resting, Pidge decided everyone other than Allura and Shiro were entitled to nap, not that Keith did either, on the off chance Pike would wander off again. When it came to waking up Pidge and Hunk, Pidge nearly took Allura’s toes off with her axe, ever the gremlin when woken before it happened naturally. Keith was bullied into letting Hunk carry Pike, as he didn’t have the heart to wake him. Poor Hunk copping unintentional glares that were supposed to be directed at Shiro who’d decided everything. After his and Pidge’s attempt at “Eye Spy” had fizzled out, there hadn’t been much to do other than shoot glares at Shiro for separating him from his boyfriend.

Calling it a night early, Hunk and Pidge tried to create an improvised bath. Pike waking when Hunk set him on his feet, tottering over to wrap his arms around Keith. Keith damn near ended up with his boyfriend on his head when Pidge and Hunk set off one of the small explosive devices they’d created back in the Bi-Boh village. Pike had hissed, jumping up him like Keith was a tree. They ended up falling backwards in a tangle of limbs, Keith landing hard on his arse in the process. Instead of creating an indent in the clay earth, they’d managed to shower everyone in dirt and dust, taking off the top few inches of soil in a circular pattern. Scolded by Shiro for their idiocy, their plans were changed. Shiro being as sick to death of the Quite Plains as the rest of them were, asking Allura to summon a mount for them. They’d held back on her summoning anything due to her low supply of arrows, barely a dozen in her quiver and all somewhat dodgy in their craftsmanship. They’d had to scavenge what they could from the village, Pidge attempting to whittle an arrow before becoming bored and giving up half way through. The arrow she let loose wobbled, the shot far from straight as the summoning portal opened. Pike hissing at the summoned beast, a Chulatt looking mouse that was far smaller than previously summoned versions of Platt. They were lucky to get anything considering the game. Keith climbed up first, seating himself at the back of Chulatt’s back, Hunk “helping” Pike up into Keith’s arms, though Pike was practically up and into his arms unaided within seconds of Keith being settled. That Pike would sleep so long didn’t strike Keith as normal, yet his tongue was held by how soft and clingy Pike was being. Nuzzling into the fellinwere, Pike let out a rumbly purr, rubbing his cheek against the side of Keith’s head affectionately. An unwanted rush of blood to the crotch had Keith feeing awkward, especially considering his crotch would be right up against Pike’s perfect little arse the whole ride on the back of Chulatt. Surely this was punishment of some kind for something Keith didn’t even know he’d done.

Chulatt wasn’t as fast as “Kosmo” and “Platt”, the mouse timid with his footing as he picked his way through the Quite Plains and into the forest between them and the pass. Pidge turned to blow as raspberry as the pinks of the plains were replaced with the greens and browns of the forest. The sudden change a clash to senses, yet not unwelcomed at all Chulatt continued under Allura’s direction. Not being on foot felt amazing. Sure, Keith was in a hell of his own making with the leather of inner thighs damp from the constant contact against Pike, and sure, Keith was growing more pent up by the second, but they were finally out of that pink hell and into the last forest before they’d make their ascent up the mountain range and over to the castle. The end was finally close enough to almost reach out and grab, Lance would be freed if the game and they’d all go back to where they belonged, where he’d begin courting his lover properly.

With the moon hidden from them by the tree canopy, Keith had no way of telling how long they’d travelled through the forest before Allura finally called it a night. Sliding off the back of Chulatt, Keith helped Pike down. His boyfriend tripping over his own feet before firmly pushing Keith away and walking off without so much as a “thanks” for helping him get down. With a shared look of confusion directed towards him, Keith set off after Pike, letting him get far away from the others before catching him by the arm to bring him to a stop

“Pike, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing... nothing. Go back to the others”

“Can’t do that, babe. Not when you’re not okay. What’s wrong?”

Pike turned, Keith finding himself pushed back up against the closest tree as his boyfriend smashed his lips into his. The kiss so hungry that it was a bad mix of teeth against teeth. Breaking the kiss, Pike’s lips went to his neck, mouthing and nipping as a leg slid between Keith’s

“P-Pike...?”

“I’m so fucking horny... gonna take your dick as you fuck me hard...”

He was what now? Keith actually jumping when Pike’s hand went to cupping his hunk

“B-babe?”

“Fucking need it, been thinking about that dick of yours up my slutty arse... fuck...”

Again... What?

Pike abandoned kissing Keith’s neck, Keith finding their positions flipped as Pike rolled them, wrapping his arm around Keith’s neck, Pike’s other hand went to his pants, his boyfriend not caring about who could be watching as he started stripping

“Babe... maybe this isn’t a good idea...?”

“I don’t care... I’m going to die if you don’t hurry up”

Keith was wrong. Grinding up against Pike’s arse hadn’t been hell, this was. Pike was horny as quiznak for him, but all he could do was wonder why

“Babe, I don’t think you’re thinking straight”

Pike whined at him, releasing Keith so he had both hands to work off his pants, letting them fall around his ankle before grasping his erection and starting to jerk himself off

“Fuck... fuck...”

Closing his eyes, Pike’s free hand hiked up his tunic, bunching the fabric up his arm as he did. Reaching his left breast, Pike let out an obscene moan as he groped himself, head knocking lightly against the tree as he let it loll back

“Dark... please... you have to touch me... I want you to touch me... I want you to fuck me and make me yours”

Keith’s restraint went out the window as he struggled down his precum damp leathers. Taking Pike by the arse, he lifted his horny lover, Pike so impatient he’d started working himself open with his tail because Keith was taking too long trying to be respectful

“Shit... I’m gonna come”

“You’re not allowed to until I tell you, do you understand me?”

Pike nodded, Keith rewarding him by rutting the leaking tip of his erection against his lover’s busy tail. Pike mewed at the sensation, trying to push down against him

“I know you want to be a good boy for me, but if you keep pushing me to hurry up, I’m not going to touch you. Stop touching yourself with your tail. Loop your arms over my shoulders and hold on with your legs”

Pike nodded quickly, doing as he was told. The coolness of the night taking the edge of aching erection as Keith took a deep breath. They had no lube, Pike had been working himself open dry

“Are you sure you want this? It might hurt”

“Don’t care... mess me up. I want you to fuck this slutty little hole of mine until I’m leaking. I wanna feel you filling me up...”

It hurt Keith to push in without lube, so it surely had to hurt Pike. Bringing two fingers to Pike’s mouth, he eagerly sucked on them as Keith kept just the tip of his dick breaching his lover. Saliva did fuck all really, but it was better than nothing. Nearly coming from having Pike suck his fingers, his boyfriend started getting whiny when Keith worked his first finger into his velvety heat. He didn’t allow his body to adjust, hips bucking as he let out a long lewd moan. Trying to work up to two fingers took coaxing, Pike wouldn’t stop riding his finger, the second pushed in rather bluntly, Pike coming up his belly and between them unexpectedly

“Fuuuuck....”

Keith wasn’t sure what to do now. He wanted Pike, but Pike was... not acting like himself

“Feel good, baby?”

His voice wobbled as he tried to play it cool

“Not enough... need you... need you in me properly... wanna come around your dick”

“Babe...”

“Please, I feel like my body is burning up. I need it... I need you... fuck me like this, stand me up and fuck me from behind, I don’t care, I need you in me”

Using Pike’s cum as lube worked better than the spit. Burying himself in Pike, Keith’s hands went from his boyfriend’s arse to his hips

“Keep your arms around me”

Fucking Pike on his dick was hot as fuck. Pike vocal, panting hard as he repeated Keith’s name over and over, mixed with begging or to stop. Pent up for so long, Keith came with a growl, forcing Pike to keep riding him through his release and into Pike’s second orgasm. Coming with a strangled whine, Keith gathered his boyfriend up against him as he slid out of Pike’s soaked heat. Nuzzling their foreheads together, Keith’s legs felt like jelly

“You okay, baby?”

“Mmm...”

“That good?”

“Mhmm... feels so good...”

Keith agreed wholeheartedly. He’d thought Pike was mad over him doing something, not horny as fuck for him. It stroked his ego

“We should get cleaned up”

“Sleepy...”

Pike had slept so long that he shouldn’t be sleepy, then again, he’d made him come twice. His fellinwere was a blissed out mess

“Let’s get cleaned up, then you can sleep”

“Mmm”

Pike couldn’t stand on his own, Keith holding him up against the tree as he used part of Pike’s cloak he’d cut free to make sure his boyfriend was cleaned up. His own orgasm had left him wanting a nap, as if all his energy had been squeezed out by Pike’s amazing arse. When Keith released him to start cleaning himself up, Pike slid down the tree into a squat, eyes already starting to droop. Adorable. His boyfriend was absolutely adorable

“Babe, you gotta stay awake a little longer”

Pike grumbled at him, one curled coming up to rub at his eye

“But I’m sleeeeepy”

“I know you are, but I still haven’t cleaned myself up”

“Hurry up... want to cuddle”

That wasn’t how things worked. They didn’t have water to clean up so things were still sticky despite wiping

“Real soon, babe. When we get back to the others”

Pike huffed, before pouting, Keith shaking his head as he finished cleaning himself up. It’d do for now, though later he’d definitely be regretting it.

None of their companions would meet Keith’s eyes as he carried his spoilt boyfriend back to where they’d made camp. Keith could almost feel the embarrassment rolling off of them, Pike did have a habit of being very vocal, so the group had probably heard most of what had happened. Ignoring them, he sat Pike by the fire before letting himself drop down beside him, his boyfriend whining over the few seconds of lost contact, before settling into Keith’s hold. Keith kissing the top of Pike’s head in reassurance that he hadn’t run off and left him, not that he thought he’d get all that far if he tried.

“Soooo, is he alright?”

Pidge elbowed Shiro, hard enough for Shiro to flinch

“Don’t ask him that”

“No one else was saying anything”

“What happened to “Patience yields focus”? We all would have been happy not to think about that, but noooo”

Shiro ignored Pidge’s annoyance over overhearing too much

“That’s why I’m asking if he’s okay? He didn’t seem happy... You didn’t...”

Keith cast a glare at Shiro

“If you’re asking if I forced myself on my own boyfriend, you can kindly go f-... jump. He’s fine. Tired, but fine”

“Shhh... I’m sleeping”

Keith’s moment of anger at his brother vanished as quickly as it came. Pike diffusing the situation before things were said that couldn’t be taken back

“Sorry, babe. You have to stay up and eat something, then you can sleep”

“Too tired to eat...”

“Must have been all that sex-ercise?”

Hunk was never supposed to say those words. Keith’s cheeks dusting pink, which only turned to flaming red when Allura followed up with

“Oh! They were having sex! I thought Pike was crying again”

Pidge gaped at Allura. Allura beamed at herself for figuring it out. Hunk shifted uncomfortably. Shiro pinched his nose the way he did when he needed moment. Pike simply nuzzled into Keith for more cuddles. Feeling the need to pile it on for no reason known to Keith, Allura went and added

“There’s nothing to be embarrassed about. Sex is a natural thing. We all knew Keith was already in a sexual relationship with P-...”

Keith wanted to sink into the ground with Pike and never return. Pidge raised her axe, pointing the blade in Allura’s direction

“Vala, I will murder you in your sleep if you keep talking about this. Not all humans are, or want to be, as open with their sex lives as these two idiots. So please, stop making me think of my brothers bumping uglies”

From his hold came Pike’s mumbly voice

“Felt good”

Keith wanted to smack Pike for his unneeded contribution. Throwing her hands in the air, Pidge was done

“That’s it. I’m done. Hunk, magic up a shower so I can wash this conversation out my brain”

“Humans can do that?”

Allura sounded doubtful, yet as if she thought there was some remote chance as far fetched as it sounded

“Not normally, but I’m going to give it my best shot, I’ll use my axe if I have to. Hunk, you’re with me”

*

Pike slept walked on both the nights they spent within the confines of the forest. Keith catching him within the first few steps on the first night, Shiro waking him on the second. Both following mornings Pike woke as if he hadn’t slept at all, stumbling around yawning until they gave up and called it a night, making very little progress at all. Allura attempted to summon a mount, only the arrow went straight up before falling uselessly like a stick to the forest floor.

Reaching the mountain pass, they came to yet another village. With their track record, Allura, Pidge and Hunk went ahead to scout as Keith set up camp away from the main road. The view was something else. Soaring stone as smooth as marble yet the colour of limestone made up the two carved trees whose branches made the gate to the pass. The town fenced with thick trees forcing travellers through the main gate that served as check point for all those who hoped to pass. With the game against them and the evil Queen to consider, Hunk had cast a disguise spell on all of them, promising he’d done his best, as they all now appeared to be Paladins of the Light. Pidge immediately beginning to preach the Way of Light, Allura in hysterics, joining as Hunk tried to be the adult of the situation, shooing his two companions on towards town.

With nothing to do, once camp was made, Keith was bored.

[athenadcvell]

Also, I heard u were looking for requests. May I ask for a NatSharon and Stucky HS AU? Thank you!!!!!

It can be DC or Marvel, just send me a prompt, and I’ll write it. If you just want a pairing, send that, relationship can be whatever (platonic, love, etc.). I don’t do smut cause I’m too awkward, and if you send me pedophile or incest shit, chances are I’ll block you. Ask away!It can be DC or Marvel, just send me a prompt, and I’ll write it. If you just want a pairing, send that, relationship can be whatever (platonic, love, etc.). I don’t do smut cause I’m too awkward, and if you send me pedophile or incest shit, chances are I’ll block you. Ask away!Note: @crazyfangirl932 sorry this took so long! Not my best work (I wrote this while in a cramped seat next my toddler brother on a 12 hour flight) but I hope you still enjoy!

Warnings: None

Word Count: 1,525

—-

Bucky can’t help but laugh as he watches his friend pace back and forth in her dorm room. He doesn’t get the privelege of seeing this particular individual nervous very often, however, the few times like this are always a pleasant treat. 

The students of Avengers High School have been let out for the day, and the two of them had headed back to the dorm rooms shared by all the students of the high school. 

“Barnes,” Natasha’s chilling emerald eyes snap up. “Shut up.”

Bucky only laughs, again, his own eyes lighting up with amusement. “I didn’t say anything,” He holds his hands up innocently. 

“I can hear the teasing. It’s not funny.”

Bucky snorts, holding back a laugh. He’s too scared to test her patience at the moment, considering he’s been doing exactly that since school was let out. 

“So, were you this nervous when I asked you out?” Bucky asks instead, leaning his elbows on his knees.  Natasha slowly exhales through her nostrils, keeping her calm as best as she can. She can only remember the times when Bucky was just the quiet, emo looking kid in her math class who followed around the captain of the football team. Oh how she regrets ever introducing herself to him. 

A snarky reply is on the tip of the redhead’s tongue as the floorboard’s shift and creak beneath someone’s weight. Both teens snap towards the doorway, their caution slipping away as Steve peeks his head in. 

“Hey, guys,"  He smiles warmly at his friends, walking over to the bed where Bucky sits. 

"Hey, punk,” Bucky grins and leans up for a kiss. Natasha narrows her eyes at the two of them.

“Steve,” The blonde abruptly pulls away from the kiss, his hand lingering on Bucky’s cheek. “Tell your boyfriend to leave or he’s going to lose a limb. Again.”

“O-kay,” Steve says slowly, chuckling nervously at the violent bickering. “What’s going on?”

“Nat’s nervous because of her date with Sharon tonight,” Bucky informs him, clearly finding the whole situation amusing. Steve doesn’t share the amusement, but instead, shock. 

“Sharon asked you out?” He exclaims, the O shape of his mouth forming into a smile. “Nat, that’s great! … Right?”

“I mean, yeah, whatever,” Natasha shrugs carelessly, attempting to play it off as nothing. Bucky sees through her and bursts out laughing, only testing her patience to a further extent. 

“She’s been pacing ever since we got back from school.”

“No I haven’t.”

“Romanoff, who are you fooling?”

“Nobody, I’m assuming,” Steve and Bucky both jump in surprise as Clint pops his head up from underneath a pile of blankets thrown on a beanbag chair. Seeing the shocked glances the couple are giving him, and the eye roll from his best friend, Clint straightens up and changes his answer. “Or… everybody?”

“Wh-what… How did you… how long were in there?” Steve stutters in disbelief. Clint yawns and stretches, scratching the back his head. 

“I dunno. I came here at the beginning of lunch to take a nap–”

“In my room?”

“You have the soft blankets that feel like clouds!” Clint argues defensively, motioning to the heaping pile of shawls and quilts laying in his lap. “So, what’d I miss?”

“The entire school day.”

“Principle Fury is going to have your ass.”

“Sharon asked Natasha out.”

“Someone asked Romanoff out?” Natasha groans as another person enters her bedroom. It’s her fault, really, for not locking the door. Then again, she assumed her friends had the decency to knock rather than just barge into her dorm whenever they felt like it. 

Tony jumps on the other end of the beanbag chair, knocking Clint half a foot into the air. “How is this possible? I thought everyone in our school had run in fear from the wrath of your scrutinizing gaze?”

“Very funny,” Natasha laughs dryly, crossing her leather clad arms tightly. “Fine. If you all must know, Sharon Carter asked me out after seventh period. We’re going to watch to a movie tonight, and honestly, Barnes is an asshole and is making it into a much bigger deal,” Bucky snorts, laying his chin on Steve’s shoulder. 

“I’m a supportive friend.”

“Asshole, friend, same thing,” Natasha shrugs, flicking a strand of fiery hair out of her eyes. Tony raises a brow at the two of them, a comment on the tip of his tongue. Then again, Tony Stark is rarely ever left at a loss for words. 

“Wait, so let me get this straight,” He holds his hands out, arching a brow. Steve sighs quietly, already know he’s not going to like the billionaire teenager’s next words. “Rogers is dating Romanoff’s ex,” He motions to Bucky and Steve. “And Romanoff is going on a date with Roger’s ex. And this isn’t the least bit awkward for either party?”

“Sharon and I never really… dated,” Steve becomes flustered at the subject. He knew he wasn’t going to like it. “I-I mean, we weren’t even ever a couple. We hardly- I mean, not hardly, but–”

“We get it, babe,” Bucky pats his hand to allow Steve to stop. The blonde clears his throat and nods, fiddling with the sleeves of his Avengers High Letterman. 

“Aww, look, Stark, you made Cap nervous,” Clint laughs through a mouthful of day old fries he had found on Natasha’s desk. 

“Mission accomplished,” Tony smirks. Natasha raises a single brow at the sarcastic teen, deciding to target her verbal attack at a new individual. 

“And what about you, Tony?” She asks with mock sweetness. “How’s your love life? Still crushing on that popular cheerleader; what’s her name again?”

“Virginia Potts,” Steve responds, smiling as he sees Tony’s smirk begin to vanish. 

“She goes by Pepper,” Tony grumbles. “And I see what you’re doing. Point made.”

“Good,” Natasha nods, motioning to the door. “Now, if that’s all, I’d appreciate it if you were to all leave. I have a date to get ready for.”

“Can I stay? I’m still eating,” Clint asks, already sinking back into the beanbag chair, the mountain of blankets fully masking him. Natasha shrugs, struggling to shove Steve and Bucky off the bed. 

“Remember, don’t sleep with her on the first date!” Tony calls as he makes a quick escape, barely managing to dodge the shoe chucked in his direction. 

—-

“Last night was fun,” Sharon leans against Natasha’s locker, smiling as she clutches her books against her chest. 

“Well, if it was fun, then let’s do it again sometime,” Natasha replies without a beat, sliding a textbook out of the metal compartments. Sharon laughs in surprise. 

“Natasha Romanoff, are you asking me on a second date?" 

"I might be,” Natasha smirks. “What do you say?”

“I say,” Sharon leans in closer, a smile playing on her lips. “I will. At a cost, though.”

“Deal,” The red headed teen breaks the small space between them, giving her new girlfriend a short but sweet kiss. Natasha pulls away after a moment, feeling a pair of eyes on them. Quite a few, to be exact. 

Natasha Romanoff isn’t exactly known in AHS as someone who’s open to relationships. She’s closed off and generally cold to those she isn’t familiar with. The last person who managed to break past her baracade was Bucky, however, things didn’t exactly work out with them. Now, however, it seems a new love interest has entered the teenagers’s life. 

“I’ve gotta get to class– P.E with Ms. May,” Sharon sighs, jabbing a thumb behind her. 

“I’ll see you later?” Natasha asks hopefully. Sharon smirks, nodding. 

“I’m counting on it,” Sharon waves her fingers as she walks away, sauntering off to class before the bell goes off. 

“Yo, Nat!” The pair of eyes gains a voice, Sam jogging up to his friend. 

“Hey, Wilson.”

“Did I just see you kissing Sharon Carter?” He grins, leaning against the spot the blonde had been a moment ago. “Nice.”

“Alright, whatever,” Natasha laughs, unable to hold back a genuine smile. “Ready to go to Chemistry?”

“Ugh,” Sam groans, throwing head back. “Don’t remind me. I don’t know how much time I can spend listening to Stephen and Tony argue over the stupidest shit before I pour some acid on myself.”

“It’s alright,” Natasha shrugs as they begin walking, dodging several students walking to their classes. “If they get too annoying, I’ll poor acid on them myself.”

The two of them walk into the bustling Chemistry class, where Tony and Stephen had already begun arguing over something that was most likely meaningless. 

The bell lets out it’s shrill ring, the students scrambling to take their seats before the teacher walks in. However, before class can officially begin, the overhead speakers switch on. 

“This is Principle Fury,” Nick Fury’s voice echoes throughout the school. There’s an edge in his tone as he speaks. “Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, Tony Stark, Bruce Banner, Clint Barton, and Thor Odinson, please report to my office. Immediately.”

—-

Send me requests for fanfics! Guidelines: It can be DC or Marvel, just send me a prompt or an AU, and I’ll write it. If you just want a pairing, send that, relationship can be whatever (platonic, love, etc.). I don’t do smut cause I’m too awkward, and if you send me pedophile or incest shit, chances are I’ll block you. Ask away!

[allivegottodoislove]

The Song Remains The Same

chapter twelve! here it is! i hope everyone enjoys it!!!

They stood in that silence for a moment. Minutes felt like they turned to hours, and then days. This sort of silence was all encompassing. Jimmy, the evil genius he was, had finally managed to do the impossible. What did you do with this? What were the repercussions down the road?

     As far as Calypso, no one had ever come back to life, except for maybe Jesus, and certainly no one had ever de-aged. Did this count as desecration of corpse? Would they think that Bonzo had faked his death all those years ago? The other boys would be an even bigger problem. There was no way to explain this to people without telling them the whole truth. There laid the problem.

     Perhaps now was not the best time to worry about this. Other issues had to be dealt with. Calypso was jumping ahead. Those were problems they could figure out in the months to come. That is, if she got to stay. It was still unclear. Robert might not want her to stay and she didn’t want to just assume she would be welcomed in.

     “Well, shall you wake him or shall I?” Calypso asked in an attempt to break the silence. She held no intentions of waking John Bonham after a two-decade long nap.

     Given his reputation, she was sure the idea of the situation wouldn’t be weird. An unknown woman waking him. Calypso was sure this must has happened time and time again in the past. But, also given his reputation, Calypso didn’t want to be that woman. A friendly face would be better.

     John Paul would have to be that friendly face. Calypso so wished that Robert would have come. He was the one that Bonzo was more likely to get in trouble with. This was a weird scenario. No, weird didn’t cover it. This was a downright bizarre place to be. Robert would make Bonzo question it a little less, at least for a bit. But, she understood why he had to stay back with Jimmy.

     “I can,” John Paul chuckled. He must have heard the nerves in her voice. “As pretty of a face as you are, I think it’s best if I handle it. Someone he knows might be best,” he said with a smile. She was just glad she wouldn’t be causing the scene.

     Jonesy’s eyes never seemed to leave Bonzo’s form. He walked over slowly, deliberately. He motioned for her to stay put and she just chuckled. Her last intention was to move. They would need a bit of space. She was sure of that. No need to crowd them around and rush into meeting Bonzo. It would be quite a moment.

     It was a moment to remember forever. Seeing someone after a long time was always exciting. Seeing someone after an impossibly long time? These sort of reunions only happened in heaven. Calypso couldn’t imagine the joy in Jonesy’s heart. She could only touch it with daydreams of reuniting with her mother. Simply being involved overwhelmed her.

     There was caution in the air, though. One wrong move and everything came crashing down around them. It was a sort of nightmare. Perhaps it was one that Jonesy had before. So close to waking his friend, saving him from the other side, only for him to disappear in the end.

     Jonesy crouched down next to Bonzo, who’s back was to him, and he simply sat there for a moment. Did he ruin it yet?

     His touch to Bonham’s shoulder was light. The mood shifted at once. This was all real. It was all real and none of it was going to melt away. “Hey Bonz,” Jonesy whispered. There was a familiar in John’s tone that touched Calypso’s heart. How long had he waited to say those words?

     “Hey, John, you gotta get up. I need you to get up now,” he said. He nudged a bit more at the drummer’s shoulder. Clearly he was trying to rouse Bonham, but a second fear seemed to be gripping Jonesy.  

     John was physically in front of them, there was no arguing that. Jimmy’s magic had worked. It had repaired John’s body and restored it to how he looked in 1973. But what if that was it? Just a physical restoration and nothing past. The magic had been strong enough for this, but had it been strong enough to return his soul?

     Bonzo’s eyes fluttered a little bit. That didn’t help Jonesy any, and the fear gripped him. Calypso thought for a second he might just slouch to the ground in defeat and despair. Bonzo shifted and turned toward Jonesy as his eyes opened.

     “Yeah, yeah, sorry ‘bout that mate. Morning and shit,” he mumbled. He propped himself up with his right hand and wiped the sleep out of his eyes with the other.

     The relief and joy on Jonesy’s face was clear and obvious. He had a grin painted ear to ear. For a second, it looked as if Jonesy might just grab Bonzo by the face and kiss him. Calypso prayed he didn’t.

     “Didn’t mean to worry ya, just out like a…” He cut himself short and looked around, before flinging himself backwards. It was clear he was confused and trying to make space between himself and Jonesy.

     Bonzo’s violent backward scoot stopped when he pressed himself against his grace. “Why the fuck do you look like nineteen seventy fucking two?” He demanded. He was frantically searching the area and clearly took in all the graves around him. He turned and looked at his own. From where Calypso stood, she assumed he could only make out his name and the day he died. That would be more than enough.

     “A grave? A fucking grave? This shit isn’t funny Jones,” he screamed. It was a primal sort of rage she had never seen before. He attempted to stand up. To both Jonesy and Calypso, it was obvious his body was stiff. And for good reason, after all. Bonzo had no idea why, though. “What a sick fucking joke. I don’t know how Robert got you in on this, but don’t deny it. I know that smile,” he said as he pointed a finger.

     “Where’s Percy? Where’s the wee lad? I’m gonna kick his fucking ass this time.”

     “Hey John,” Jonesy said softly. Calypso was glad that John was the one handing this. It would have been too much for her to handle. Even as it was now, this was still too much. All she could hope was that she wouldn’t be noticed by Bonzo.

     She didn’t look like Robert’s ex-wife, she knew that. She was a little tanner than the average white person, but nothing past that. She certainly wouldn’t be mistaken for a middle aged Indian woman. Thankfully, she seemed forgotten for the time.

     “Hey, John,” Jonesy said softly. His hands were outstretched to help his friend up and to steady him. It was also not a bad point of control. Though, it wasn’t likely that the twig-like John stood a chance against the beasty John. “I need you to slow down, just listen to me, alright?” He kept his voice level and calm.

     “Just tell me where the fuck Perce is and then we can deal with anything else later,” Bonzo demanded.

     “There’s a lot we’ve got; I’ve got to tell you. There’s a lot,” he trailed off as he looked around.

     Was there more fitting of a place than a graveyard to be having a mental breakdown? Calypso couldn’t think of one. The one Bonzo might be leading himself into though? That was something that needed to be dealt with privately. She knew this wasn’t the place, and Jonesy seemed to be thinking the same. Bonzo was having none of it, his friend’s words going in one ear and out the other.

     “Just. Tell. Me. Where. Percy. Is.” Bonzo demanded. Calypso now understood why reporters hadn’t been allowed to look at him. “It can’t be that fucking hard, Jones.”

     “John,” he said with a warning tone, “I’ll explain everything in the car. Hell, I plan on bringing you straight to Robert. It’s his bloody car we’re in. Just trust me,” he said.

     There was a glimmer of fight in John. A waving that suggested he could go one of two ways. That fight was drowned out. By what, there was no way to know specifically. Something about Jonesy probably hit him, and Calypso understood now why Jonesy was the better choice than Bonzo. Why they both have just started fighting in the middle of the graveyard?

     “Yeah, fine, as long as you know I’m kicking Robert’s ass the second I see him,” he said with a glare.

     “Of course, whatever you want,” Jonesy said dismissively. He knew better than that. By the time they got back to Robert’s, Bonzo likely wouldn’t have any fight in him.

     “Yeah, yeah. You’re not sneaking me off early to the tour, though, are ya? Pat was pissed the last time you did that,” Bonzo said.

     “No, no tour this time Bonzo.”

     “Well, then what the fuck was the point of rehearsals? Ain’t we got one in a month?” He asked. He turned to look at the grave. His eyes widened as he took in the details.

     “Oh, well of course John. We’re just not sneaking you out early. No point in that.” Jonesy laughed nervously. “No games or anything or the like.”

     Bonzo looked around again, locking eyes momentarily with Calypso. She held her breath, afraid he might say something about her. Would she refuel the fire? She was too afraid to blink for those few seconds, until he turned back to Jonesy, and then his gravestone.

     Jonesy, naturally, noticed this. The last thing he wanted to do was give him the talk here. At least a car was a partially controlled situation. “C’mon John, we gotta get going. We’re bound to catch a cold out here,” he said. He gently tugged on Bonzo’s forearm. Bonzo moved with him. Fight, for now, seemed to have left his body.

     Staring at one’s own grave easily silence a man, even if Bonzo believed it was a prank. Calypso felt like her brain had turned to soup. John was working on absolutely no knowledge of what was really going on. Waking up somewhere strange probably wasn’t weird. It came with the crowd. But this was a level of weird she doubted even Zeppelin could have touched back in the day.

     Bonzo’s eyes scanned wildly as he and John walked. He needed to take everything in. He needed to find some sort of clue as to what was going on. As they walked by Calypso, Jonesy motioned for her to fall behind them.

     “Who’s the lass following us?” Bonzo asked with a tilt of his head.

     “A friend of Robert’s,” Jonesy answered softly.

     “He’s keeping one in England now? He’s gotten daring, or he’s just fucking stupid. Especially finding one so quickly. She wasn’t with us last night, right?” Bonham continued. John Paul flinched.

     “No, no she wasn’t with us last night. I’m not sure where he picked her up,” John Paul replied. She couldn’t imagine having to play it off like this. It was the best for now. Telling him that last night was over two decades ago might not be the best in the middle of a graveyard.

“And she’s with you? You never let them near you.”

“Yes, well, I suppose I’ve given up. Percy’s gonna do what he’s gonna do, I suppose,” John Paul said with a shrug.  “Calypso, would you mind driving?” He asked her.

“I don’t mind at all,” she said with a smile. The idea of having to drive here unnerved her just a bit. She’d not been planning to. None of this was really anything she had been planning to do. Being stuck in the back of a car with John Bonham, freshly reanimated, wasn’t her idea of a fun day.

“I’ll tell you where to go its, just… best,” he said. He glanced at Bonham for a minute and she nodded. Thankfully, Bonham didn’t seem to notice. He was too focused on the car in front of them. He tossed her the car keys before she slipped into the driver’s seat.

“An American in London,” Bonzo chuckled. “He exporting them in too? You sure I’ve only been out in the graveyard a few hours?” He asked as he got in the car. Calypso was buckling herself as he spoke. Her stomach dropped. Without even knowing it, Bonzo had trapped Jonesy in the corner. His guts had to be spilled now, or somehow never.

They both slipped into the car, wordlessly. The uncomfort was obvious on Jonesy’s face. “John, actually, I think we need to talk,” he said softly. He never once glimpsed at Bonham.

“I’m only kidding, I know how long I’ve been out mate. I don’t have a drinking problem,” he said. There was a firmness in his voice. This was a conversation they had before, in the past. No doubt John Paul would try to get his friend to stop. John Paul, out of all of them, might have been the most levelheaded. He would see the writing on the wall.

“Actually, John, you did have a bit of a drinking problem.” Jonesy didn’t look at Bonzo when he talked. His eyes were starting to fill with tears. How do you tell someone about their own death? “Out of here, Calypso,” he said, his voice a bit more even. “You’re going to take the immediate right, and then go straight for quite some time,” he said.

Driving gave her something else to focus on, she realized. As much as she wanted to hear the conversation in the back, she knew that she couldn’t ease drop that much. The Johns would need a touch of privacy. And she needed to make sure to stay on the left side of the road.

“We’ve gone through this Jones,” he said in a waring tone.

“No, John, there’s a few things you need to know before we get back to Robert’s.”

“What about Robert’s? We were at Jim’s last night, ain’t that where we’re supposed to be?” His tone was one still filled a bit with anger. More anger than Calypso felt totally comfortable with. Jonesy only seemed able to sigh.

“What’s today’s date, Bonz?”

“26th of September, unless I slept through more than a day.” Calypso couldn’t help the small chuckle that left her mouth.

“Oh, is it this right John?” She said, trying to play off her laugh. It was likely to only make Bonzo angrier.

“Yes, it is. This right and then there’s gonna be a left not long after, take that,” he answered before turning back to face his friend. “What year is it John?” There was a strain in his voice. He likely thought that this would be easier to do. Perhaps, in some odd way, John had hoped Bonzo would remember being dead, or at least not here.

“1980, like it has been all year, you twat,” Bonzo said with a roll of his eyes.

“Calypso, dear, would you mind telling me the year?” John asked without looking up to her.

“2007,” she mumbled gently. She didn’t want to be involved in this. It was the last thing she wanted to be dragged into. “December 12th, exactly if you want that too,” she said. She hoped this would absolve her from doing anything else.

“Very fucking funny,” John answer angrily. “She’s Robert’s girl, you can’t expect me to believe her, can you?” John talked with his hands. The movements seemed to get a bit jerkier and jerkier with every movement. Was this fear? Or was this him trying to restrain anger?

“Calypso, do you mind sharing your birthday? I know it’s not proper to ask a lady…”

“April 20th, 1986,” she said. Apparently there was no getting her out of this trap. Jonesy was going to drag her down the deep end with him. “This left, yes?”

“No, no, the next one. My apologies,” he said. “After that, you’ll just want to follow the road.”

“This isn’t a funny sort of joke, Jonesy. I don’t know what Robert set you up to do, but cut it out. Think you’re clever to get the girl in on it?” He rolled his eyes, glancing out the window. There was a pause for a moment.

“John Henry Bonham,” he said with a sigh, “you need to listen to me. You died, you died that night in 80. You choked to death on your own damn vomit.” Anger rose for the first time in John Paul.

Calypso couldn’t blame Jonesy. He had years and years of pent up emotions about Bonzo. They likely ranged anywhere from just pure sorrow to homicidal rage. With the man in front of him, how could Jonesy keep it together? How couldn’t he get mad at his friend who destroyed himself?

“If you don’t want to believe me, we can pull over and ask any damn person you want to. I don’t suggest that, but if you want it, by all means,” Jonesy said with a shrug. Calypso felt her stomach knot. The last thing she wanted to do was pull over in a car with two rockstars straight out the seventies.

“Because you don’t want to get caught in a lie.”

“No, because me and the other guys just had a gig last night, and those pictures are probably already everywhere, with pictures of us from back in the day. They might just recognize us now, and you’re not alive legally,” he said with a sigh.

“They won’t be in the press anytime soon. For that to happen, they’d have to go through Peter, and then the press still wouldn’t get them until tonight,” he said. It was clear that he didn’t want to believe this. Could she blame him? It was a line of thought that just didn’t seem possible.

“Grant can’t stop anything, Bonz. Peter Grant died in-“

“-1995,” John Paul and Calypso said together. She was already in the situation, and perhaps if they both knew that fact, he might just believe them. This back and forth would kill her. They just needed to get it over with.

There was a pause. An uncomfortable silence filled the car. Calypso would have fiddled with the radio to break the silence, but she didn’t know how to. Didn’t dare play around with things in Robert’s car. As it was, she had enough to focus on.

“Lass, what year did you say you were born in again?” Bonzo asked after a moment.

“86,” she said softly, “It’s this turn, right John?” She asked.

“Yes, this one. And then just keep going, I’ll tell you when the next turn gets close,” he said with a smile. From there, a silence once again filled the car. This one wasn’t uncomfortable, this one was heavy.

Peering into the review mirror, Calypso got a glimpse of John’s face. It looked concerned, angry, but mostly just extremely sad. It had to be a lot to take in at once for him. It seemed that perhaps now Bonzo was soaking in what was being told to him. Calypso let out a sigh of relief. John Paul looked just as relieved.

“So, this wasn’t some sort of elaborate joke put on by Perce? You swear?”

“I swear, Bonzo. You know I never side with him anyways,” he said. There was a sideways sort of smile on his face. “But, no Bonz, you’ve really been dead,” he said.

“That doesn’t explain all this, though. Doesn’t explain like we’re about to go record the third bloody album again,” he said. John hadn’t managed to see himself yet. Having seen John, he was a bit too scared to see what he looked like.

“John, I’m afraid straight isn’t an option anymore. Left or right?” Calypso asked gently. She hated to burst in. There was no other option, though. They needed to get home as fast as possible.

“My apologies, it’s the right,” he said. “After this, it really is going to be a straight away,” he said with a smile. “And Jimmy’s your explanation for all this, John. When isn’t he?” John Paul said with a smirk.

“He worked some sort of magic back in 73, after the filming to keep us there forever or something. Ask him when we get back,” he said with a shrug. He glanced at Calypso for a second. She prayed she didn’t mention anything about her right now. She couldn’t read John.

If John was angry about this, upset about it, then surely he would end up taking it out on her. She still blamed herself. At the end of the day, she was the magic switch that had set everything off. Jimmy set it up, but she was the first falling domino.

Bonham looked at her for a moment. She could feel his eyes on her. His mind was whirling, no doubt. Calypso just feared what he might be thinking. “Why now? What’s changed? Is it the lass?” He asked, cocking his head toward her for a second.

“Yeah, she and Robert are in love or something like that, something stupid,” he chuckled.

“And how’s his Mo feel about this?”

“They’ve been divorced forever, God probably since the 80s?” He said with a shrug. “It’s what they feel, I guess. And what Jimmy felt like doing,” he said.

“That little fucking,” Bonham mumbled. “I’m gonna throttle Jimmy when I see him.” There was no way of saying how genuine that was. Sure, it seemed like a mild inconvenience to everyone else. But Bonzo? Did he really have a leg to stand on when it came to being mad with Jimmy? Didn’t he have the most to gain from this?

“Hey, John, this looks familiar. Is it this right?” She asked softly.

“Yes, it is. This should be Robert’s house now, if I’ve remembered the right way.” He sighed before turning to face Bonzo yet again. “And if you could just calm down. It’s a long story, I’m sure he’ll be happy to give it you once we get back in,” Jonesy said.

“And your Mo, how’s she feel about this?”

“She’s just as young as us, I thought I woke up in a dream,” he said with a smile. He paused for a minute, clearly relieving it. To wake up not only young again, but to wake up to your loved one young as well? It seemed to be a fairytale come true.

Calypso drove slowly up the driveway, not remembering it being this long. As she glanced in the back, she couldn’t help but smile. It was written all over John Paul’s face how much he loved his face. To be so in love after forty something years of marriage? Calypso could only hope the same for herself.

“So my Pat?” Bonham’s voice was filled with hope. Perhaps for the first time since they had picked him up, he sounded something positive. Her heart broke when she knew what had to be said next.

“We haven’t heard from her,” John Paul paused. The hope and sheer love in Bonham’s eyes disappeared, fear and sadness replacing them. If Peter Grant could be dead, what of his Pat? “So we can’t know for sure. Jimmy has her contact information, though. So he might have a better answer for you,” he tacked on quickly.

“Do you mind if run on in head first, just to let them know we’re here and all?” She was sure that Robert had noticed the car. If she was them, she’d be sitting right by the window. Half the reason she had been happy to go was that she wouldn’t have to wait for the answer.

[megatraven]

If Love Took Just a Few Moments

Summary: Five moments that lead up to a confession of sorts between Alya and Marinette, and what happens after. Spoilers for Prime Queen are present in this fic. Alyanette.

AO3 | WC: 2384 | Buy me a coffee + request something! | Commissions

v

When Marinette said goodbye to Alya the night of Prime Queen’s attack, she collapsed in her bed and stared at the ceiling. Her heart still hammered in her chest from the events of the day, from the fear of almost losing her best friend.

But she was Ladybug, and she would never let something so awful happen to someone she cared for deeply.

So she hadn’t.

She’s saved the day, Chat by her side, and when she had returned home, she saw Alya safe and sound, not a hair out of place. It wasn’t quite real until they hugged, but then it was, and Marinette had felt a heavy weight lift from her shoulders as she sighed into Alya.

Her thoughts were still on her best friend when exhaustion mixed with relief finally pulled her into a deep sleep, and if she dreamed of hazel eyes, well...

That would be her little secret.

iv

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Alya!” Marinette called out, waving goodbye as Alya left through the bakery.

Her cheeks hurt from smiling so much, but that was often a side-effect of hanging out with Alya, and it only worsened when they babysat Manon together. It was the best kind of hurt, though, so Marinette didn’t mind.

Giving a quick kiss to both of her parents, she bounded back upstairs to her room to allow herself a moment to catch her breath. Looking around, she saw a few toys and pillows still scattered about from when Manon was there earlier. Easy enough to pick up, but Marinette’s gaze caught on the picture laying on her desk. Walking over to it, her fingers traced Alya’s signature and her expression softened.

“I’m gonna need a frame for this one,” she said to nobody in particular. In it, herself, Alya, and Manon played together, each of them laughing. It warmed her heart, and another thought came to her. “Or, maybe...”

Marinette glanced up to her bed, and clutched the picture to her chest. Maybe she could make a copy- so she had one to frame, and the other to keep close. For now, she walked up and set it gently beneath her pillow.

For later, she thought to herself, jumping slightly when Tikki appeared at her shoulder.

“Did you have fun today?” she asked, smiling sweetly.

“I did! We watched that video of Alya on Mme. Chamack’s show so many times it’s like, engraved in my brain.” Flopping onto her back, she sighed and rested her head on her arms. “It was also really tiring, though. Manon has so much energy, it’s crazy! My heart’s still racing from it,” she said with a laugh.

“I don’t think that’s why your heart’s racing,” Tikki whispered, and Marinette did a double take. Surely, she didn’t say what Marinette thought she did.

“What was what?”

“I said, maybe you should take a nap, rest up a bit before patrol!”

“Uh huh, sure you did,” Marinette muttered, suspicious but unable to refute it. “What’d you really say?”

“Nothing, nothing. Just get some rest.”

Marinette grumbled but conceded. She closed her eyes and settled against her pillows, ready to fall asleep for a little while.

Five minutes passed, and soon it was ten, thirty, an hour. 

She hadn’t slept a blink. Groaning, Marinette rolled onto her side, careful not to roll onto Tikki, and pulled the picture out from under her pillows.

Studying it once more, her heartbeat quickened and she groaned even louder into her arm.

“Tikki, I think I know why.”

iii

Sometimes, Marinette caught herself staring. There was always something about Alya that drew her eyes in, and that kept them there. Whether it was brushing her hair behind an ear, or the subtle bite of her lip when she was focusing on schoolwork, Marinette couldn’t help but look.

And everytime Marinette caught herself, Alya caught her too. She never laughed, or said anything about the fact, but she always smiled so sweetly, so kindly that Marinette’s cheeks reddened, and she couldn’t move or look away until Alya turned her attention back to her work.

When she was set free from Alya’s gaze, she would look forward and pretend to pay attention to class, all the while thinking about how positively alluring Alya was when she smiled at her like that. 

Marinette would do anything to keep Alya happy, her eyes and nose crinkled from smiling so widely.

Sighing contentedly into her hand, she looked down and started to mindlessly scribble in her notes.

(Later, she tore the pages free of her book, blushing furiously at the little hearts surrounding hers and Alya’s initials doodled across the margins.

They hovered over her trashcan for only an instant before she stashed them away in a drawer instead. She didn’t have the heart to throw out... well, her heart.

Even if there was a huge chance Alya had seen her.)

ii 

Alya’s head laid on her lap, and Marinette’s fingers ran through her curls with a kind of gentleness she didn’t bless many with. There was something calming about it all- sitting in the park, laying on the grass with flowers springing up all around them, being together without a worry in the world.

Days could’ve passed, and she wouldn’t have noticed so long as Alya was there, with her, in their bubble that let the rest of the world pass by without so much as a glance.

But, as it were, their comfortable silence only lasted until Alya checked her phone and how late it was getting. She sat up, and Marinette missed her instantly, her subconscious making her shift closer to her best friend.

“You’ve gotta go so soon?” Marinette asked, pouting just a bit.

“Yeah, Maman wants me to watch the twins tonight.” Alya stretched and stood up before offering Marinette her hand.

Grabbing it, Alya hoisted Marinette to her feet a little too roughly, causing Marinette to fall forward into her. Alya’s arms immediately rapped around her to make sure she was stable, but instead of letting go, she held closer.

Ignoring the dust of pink on her cheeks, Marinette hugged back, hiding her smile in Alya’s flannel.

“See you tomorrow?”

“Definitely,” Alya promised, the warmth of her breath on the back of Marinette’s neck making her shudder.

They stayed like that for a short minute before Marinette pulled away, a bittersweet look on her face.

“You should go. Don’t want you to get in trouble or anything- we’ve got a sleepover planned this weekend, after all!” she exclaimed. Her arms were half crossed, with one one hand brushing a stray lock of hair behind her ear. She rocked back and forth on her feet the tiniest bit and looked up at Alya through her lashes.

“Yeah. Yeah, of course. Lord knows I don’t want to get grounded. See you tomorrow, Sweets,” Alya said with a wink. Side-stepping Marinette, she paused half-way through and quickly planted a kiss on her cheek before hurrying off.

It took ten minutes of Tikki trying to get Marinette’s attention for her to fully process what had happened, and when she did, her face blossomed into a brilliant red that Tikki could’be camouflaged against.

It took another ten minutes for her to drag herself back home, at which point she promptly faceplanted into her pillows and screamed, although it still wasn’t louder than the thunderous beat of her heart.

i 

“Hey, can I ask you a question?” Alya asked as she spun in Marinette’s computer chair. She leaned back as far as it would let her, and her head hung off the back in a way that Marinette knew would give her a crick in the neck.

“Always,” Marinette responded, refusing to look up and break her concentration when her toenails were almost perfectly painted.

“You have a lot less pictures of Adrien on your wall than you used to.”

Faltering with her nail polish hovering just above her next nail, Marinette sighed. So much for not losing her concentration.

“That’s not a question,” she said dryly.

“Oh, stop being so smart. The ‘why’s that?’ was implied, you left boob.”

Marinette scoffed and rolled her eyes, but silently cursed the way her stomach did a flip at the topic of conversation.

“First, I’m at least both boobs. Second, I dunno.” She shrugged and went back to carefully painting. “I guess I just... realized that I like someone else,” she said, soft and low.

It felt weird, saying it out loud. But it also felt nice.

Alya stopped spinning, sat up straight, and looked at her. “Oh, yeah?”

“Mhm.”

“When’d you realize...?”

“When I- um, that is, when Ladybug and Chat Noir defeated Prime Queen, I started to suspect. But I realized it the week after.” Marinette absolutely refused to look up now, and instead watched her nails like they’d suddenly started talking.

“That was a couple months ago now,” Alya stated, rolling somewhere else in the room. “Thirsty?”

“Uh, yep, yeah it was.” Pleased with her nail art, Marinette closed her polish and began to blow on them to help the drying process along. “I could drink. Water, please?”

Alya hummed in response and grabbed two bottles of water before scooting the chair over to the chaise where Marinette was. Handing one over, she commented, “Hey, those came out really nice.”

“Thanks and thanks.” Taking the bottle, she opened it and took a quick sip. “Want me to do yours next?”

“Uh, hell yes. Maybe we should do it up in your bed though, I don’t think we have enough room here,” she said, tapping the chaise.

“Mm, yeah, I think you’re right. Meet me up there, I’m gonna just let mine dry a couple more minutes.”

“Okie doke.” Alya rolled the chair back over to Marinette’s desk and headed up to her bed. “So, about your new crush... I know them?”

“Uh huh, you could say that.”

“Not gonna tell me who?”

“I have a sneaking suspicion that you already know who it is,” Marinette said, a nervous laugh escaping her. 

“And how do you know that?” Alya asked, peaking over the edge of the bed. 

Marinette looked over her shoulder at her and rolled her eyes, a small smile on her face.

“Well, for one thing, you were there when she kissed me on the cheek a few days ago...” she trailed off, taking another drink.

“Oh, yeah. I liked her, she seemed pretty cool.”

Marinette choked on her water at that, a laugh trying to come up at the same time the water tried to go down. “Oh my god,” she said between coughs, “you’re so ridiculous.”

“Maybe so, but it hasn’t driven you away from me yet, now has it?” Alya grinned down at her.

“No, I suppose it hasn’t.” Looking at the polishes she had out, she called up, “What colors do you want? I’ve only got pinks and whites out right now.”

“I’m kind of feeling yellow today.”

“Yellow I can do. Get comfy, cause you’re not gonna be moving around and getting polish on my sheets like last time,” Marinette warned.

“Well if you didn’t instigate a tickling war, it wouldn’t have happened!” she called back.

Despite her words, Marinette could hear Alya moving and shook her head. “My room, my rules, Peaches. What I say goes.”

“That’s unfair and you know it, Dupain-Cheng.”

“All is fair in love and war,” she laughed, getting up to put her shades of pink away and to grab her yellows. “Did you want any other colors?”

“Don’t use famous quotes on me,” Alya scolded. “But I’d love some of those cute flowers you did on yours, so white too, please!”

“Sure thing!” Grabbing what she needed, she headed up to her bed and immediately dropped everything on her sheets.

Before her, Alya was looking at the picture she kept hidden beneath her pillows. With humor in her eyes, she looked up to meet Marinette’s embarrassed gaze.

“I didn’t know you liked it that much,” she said, her eyes and nose crinkled in that special way that made everything in the world okay by simply existing in proximity to Marinette.

“It... It’s one of my favorites,” Marinette admitted, bending over to pick up all the nail polish bottles up. “And you signed it, so it’s special.”

“Aw, girl. I’m glad it’s so important to you.” Setting it down beside her, Alya looked thoughtful. “You know, I only have Ladybug’s autograph. You’ve never given me Marinette’s.”

Marinette had to work very hard not to drop the vials of paint again as she stared at Alya in shock. That was short-lived, however, and soon the shock shifted into a playful smirk.

“I’m sure I could pull some strings to get you one, if you really wanted it.”

“Oh, I do,” Alya laughed, laying back when Marinette tapped her foot to signify she was going to start. “I really, really do.”

“Then consider it done,” Marinette told her with a smile. Opening one of her paints, she set to work.

nulla 

That night, after nail painting and the introduction of Tikki, Marinette and Alya had settled in to bed. Marinette was already well on her way to falling asleep, the excitement of the day taking a toll on her.

Alya, on the other hand, laid wide awake next to her.

“Mari, you still awake?” she asked, quiet but needing.

“Mhm,” Marinette hummed out, cracking her eyes open enough to see Alya watching her back.

“Can I ask you another question?”

“You jus’ did-” she yawned- “but yeah.”

“Are we...” she hesitated before finishing,”Are we dating now?”

That woke her up. “Um. Do you want us to be?”

“Yes? Maybe? I don’t know!” Alya groaned. “All I know is that I want to be more than friends.”

Marinette didn’t answer for a few seconds, but did find Alya’s hand to hold.

“Then we are,” Marinette told her, emphasizing her statement with a squeeze of her hand. 

Alya squeezed back and sighed, finally closing her eyes. “Good night, Mari.”

“Night, Als.” Marinette yawned and followed suit, scooting closer to the warmth Alya exuded.

As soon as she fell asleep, Marinette found herself seeing Alya again, and her smile made its way through to her sleeping form.

Everything felt just right.

[fanficsofmine]

Danger - Chapter 4

Thank you guys for being so understanding about us taking a break last night from posting. Next Monday, we will post the next chapter on time. It just didn’t feel right last night. Here is the next Chapter of Danger! Enjoy! -T

Read Prologue Chapter 1, 2, 3

Reader POV: Everything was a frustrating blur. I understood where Junmyeon was coming from abut hiring me security detail, but I, honestly, felt absurd. I wasn’t EXO. I wasn’t any other idol. I was just, me, and I was beginning to lose that feeling of being “just me.”

I was also constantly graced with the company of one of the guys. I know that a lot of people would give just about anything for that, as was being made painfully obvious to me. (Physically and metaphorically.)

However, I was beginning to miss my free time. I wanted to walk out and grab a cup of coffee without a security officer sitting a few booths behind me, staring at me as though I was some form of a lost treasure he was forced to protect.

I felt as though I was wasting the guys time by them feeling obligated to be around me constantly. They all insisted that it was fine. Honestly, I felt as though it was just going to cause more problems being seen out with them more frequently. I lost every battle attempting to tell them so, however.

“It’s not up for discussion,” Yixing told me one particularly emotional day that I was having.

He, Baekhyun and I were at the dorms a few days after my apartment had been ransacked when I snapped at them for attempting to control my every move.

He put his arm around me and I laid my head on his shoulder. “Love,” he told me, “we don’t want to control you. We care about you. It’s rare for us to make genuine, non-idol friends. You care about us for us. You’re one of the few people who has ever treated us like people when we first met. You’re important to us. That’s why…”

I cut him off, gently, but firmly, “I know. I know Yixing. I get it. I would probably do the same thing if the roles were reversed. I just… I don’t know, I guess. I feel like I’m being babysat. As a grown up, that’s extremely frustrating.”

He rested his cheek on my head and sighed.

“Believe me. We get it,” Baekhyun chimed in, “we are used to being told what we can and can’t do down to what we could and couldn’t eat during trainings. Constantly being followed by a guard. It’s infuriating. We aren’t wanting to rule every aspect of your life. We just want you safe.”

I could tell that I was not going to change their minds. I raised my hands in defeat.

“I surrender.” Yixing lifted his cheek from resting on my head, and smiled down at me.

“When this blows over, we’ll help you return back to a normal life, okay?”

I nodded.

We heard the front door open and close, and Chanyeol and Jongin walked into the room.

Jongin waved, said a quick hi, and walked into his room. They had been practicing new choreography at a studio, so I wasn’t surprised that he probably went to take a nap to rejuvenate from dancing.

Chanyeol, however, stiffened up when he saw Yixing and I on the couch. This was an interesting reaction to me.

I had always had a special liking for Chanyeol, even before I had met him. Once I became friends with them, his personality had made me fall for him. I never said anything, though. I did not want to risk ruining the dynamic that we had going on with the group. I had every assumption that he was not interested in me as well.

This new reaction, however, had me curious. He had never tensed up upon seeing me with other members before. It was not new for me to cuddle up with them in a friendly way either.

I was suddenly aware of an awkward feeling rising through my chest. My cheeks grew warm and I slightly scooted away from Yixing. He glanced back and forth between Chanyeol and I and smirked.

“Hey! Yeolie. How was dance rehearsal?” He removed his arm from my shoulders and leaned forward, elbows on his knees.

Chanyeol shook his head to bring himself back to where we were. I wasn’t sure what was going through his mind, but I intended to find out

Acting as though nothing was wrong, he flashed us his flawless smile.

“It was good. It’s always tough to rehearse with Jongin. He’s miles above me in the dancing department. Makes me work harder though.”

He sat next to me, his knee relaxing against mine. He put his hands behind his head and slouched back. He threw me a slight half-smile and I felt my heart flutter.

“Hey, Y/N,” Yixing suddenly turned to me, “didn’t you say you had to run home to do some homework? Maybe Chanyeol could take you? Baek has CBX stuff and I gotta go meet SM for my next solo mini album.”

I felt my cheeks flush hot again as I turned to him and he winked at me.

I turned to Chanyeol and his ears were just as red as my face, but he was better at composing himself as he said, “sure! I don’t mind!”

“My CBX thing isn’t for another two hours, I don’t mind taking you if Yeol is too tired from rehearsal,” sweet, oblivious Baekhyun offered. Yixing rolled his eyes.

“I’m sure Chanyeol is fine. Besides, if someone comes to attack her, what is your tiny ass gonna do?” He glared at Baek as if to tell him to shut up.

Finally, he got the hint.

“Ahhhhhhh! Good point. Yup. Should definitely be Chanyeol. He’s much stronger than I am. Have you noticed that, (Y/N)? Just how strong Chanyeol is?”

This time we all rolled our eyes and I couldn’t help but chuckle. It felt nice to laugh a bit. Chanyeol looked down when I did and gave me a sweet grin.

We drove in a comfortable silence. His long fingers fidgeted on his gear shift. I stared at his hand for a bit, desperate to lace my fingers through his. I almost dared myself to, but decided against it at risk of him not reciprocating my feelings. I could potentially be imagining everything I’ve been seeing today.

We got to my apartment and he parked behind the security detail car that was on watch for my place. This stirred my irritation again. What could they even be watching for? There was no way sitting outside of my complex could allow them to catch anybody. But, alas, here they were.

He jumped out of the car and ran to the other side to open the door for me. I was going to appear sunburned with how often I was blushing today.

I thanked him and he escorted me to my door. I was still a bit stiff from the accident, so it was nice to have a bit of support while I walked. Unfortunately, I lived on the third floor of a complex that had no elevator. Chanyeol was patient with me as he helped me up the stairs, slowly.

We got to the door of my apartment and I turned the key. I wasn’t sure why, but I had had a gut wrenching feeling that it was going to be open. I was comforted to know that it wasn’t.

I pushed the door open and another surge of anxiety was washed away when I saw my apartment was still orderly. I had a lot fewer pictures, as most of my frames had been shattered during the destruction, but it was still put together.

I fiddled with my keys as I looked up at a Chanyeol.

“Do you wanna come hang out for a bit? I could make you some tea and throw on Overwatch for you while I do my homework?” I really wanted him to stay. I still didn’t feel comfortable in my own home, but I had been putting on a brave face. I didn’t want them to know that I was actually terrified. It would only worry them more.

He pulled out his cell phone and checked the time.

“I know we have a dorm dinner tonight after CBX get back, but I can probably hang out for an hour or so.”

I was relieved to hear him say that. And giddy that I was going to get some one on one Chanyeol time.

I welcomed him into my apartment and meandered over to the kitchen. I put a kettle on and grabbed a box of cookies for him. I hadn’t been home, so my groceries option was limited.

I walked out to my living room to see Chanyeol making himself comfortable on the couch he fluffed up some pillows behind him and reached for the tv remote. Considering he had his own console at the dorms, he knew exactly how to set mine up so he could play video games.

“I have quite the fine dining experience for you, if you’d like to snack before you go back,” I joked, “would you prefer this half empty box of cookies, or I can pop you some popcorn.”

“Ah, the finest of meals, you offer!” He faked as though he was lost in thought and tapped his chin.

In the end, he settled for popcorn. I made his tea and snack and came back to him cursing at my television, mid round.

“God dammit, Genji, just fucking die already,” he was leaning forward, extremely into his game.

“I can’t believe you’re a Hanzo main,” I said, “Hanzo mains are just as bad as Genji mains.”

Without looking up from the game, he grabbed a handful of popcorn and threw it at me.

The next hour flew by, and I got absolutely no homework done. We took turns playing rounds on the PlayStation. It was the lightest I had felt since I had first realized my laptop was gone.

Eventually, Chanyeol got a call from Junmyeon asking where he was. I laughed when he rolled his eyes, no doubt getting a lecture from Junmyeon about how he’d better be on time.

“That’s my cue, unfortunately,” he groaned as he stood to leave.

I followed him to the door and opened it for him. He leaned against the frame and fiddled with his keys.

“Today was a lot of fun, (Y/N),” he looked at me and smiled. I could not stop staring at his lips. They were so pink and full. I felt myself leaning forward even though I hadn’t initially planned on it.

My breath was hitched in my throat when I noticed Chanyeol not moving away from my lean. Maybe he was feeling exactly what I was about him.

As I was almost to his lips, his hand slowly caressed my cheek. He wrapped it around the back of my neck and gently pulled me to close the gap between our lips.

It was a soft kiss. It wasn’t a passionate make out session, but a tender, sweet first kiss. I felt him smile beneath my lips and when he broke away, he looked perfectly pleased.

“I want to do more of that tonight. Can I call you after dinner so we can see each other?” He hadn’t removed his hand from my neck. We were still standing with bodies touching. I could feel his heart racing.

I nodded. I couldn’t quite formulate words from the excitement of having just kissed Chanyeol.

He told me he would call me later then, kissed my cheek, and turned down the hallway.

A girl from my Humanities class was walking by as he left. I waved at her to maintain my composure until I shut the door behind me. Immediately after I turned the lock, I let out a tiny squeal. I flopped down on my couch and could not wipe the grin off of my lips.

A few minutes later, I was caught off guard by a knock. I was not expecting anybody else. Maybe Chanyeol had forgotten something and needed to come back. I glanced around for a forgotten phone or keys, but found nothing.

Sometimes, though, security would come and check on me to ensure that I was still okay, so I assumed that’s who it was. After checking the peephole first, I confirmed it was my SM assigned officer. I unlocked and opened my door.

I was met with a sharp pain to the side of my head, and then darkness.

When I came to, it was dark and cold. My head was aching. I felt a wetness running down my cheek and neck that I concluded was blood from whatever was causing pain to radiate though my skull. I blinked my eyes a few times to try to clear my vision and adjust to the lack of lighting.

Once I was focused again, I was caught off guard to find that I was in a barn.

I was laid on the ground. I realized that I was unable to move my arms or legs.

“Fuck,” I whispered under my breath.

I fiddled with the rope restraining my wrists. I began to feel it burning its spot into my skin as I failed to loosen it. My anxiety filled my chest. I felt as though I was swimming in a bucket of ice water. The pressure of my heartbeat could be heard in my ears and felt through every vein.

It was dark, and I was alone. I was unsure where I was, and the sole thing that I knew was true was that I was mortified.

I knew that befriending one of the world’s most beloved K-Pop groups would have its repercussions, but this, this was unanticipated. I never expected it to go this far.

Harassment, sure. Name calling, I was beginning to block out. All of that was online, and people were brace behind keyboards. People using me to get close to the guys, used to it. It happened a lot when I was still in my home country.

It was the attempted murder and the kidnapping that were new and unwelcome factors.

Whoever was behind this knew me, and they knew me well. They had memorized my schedule. They knew my frequent stops. They knew I had security. I assumed that the officer was simply working for someone else, as an employee of SM would have no reason to attack me personally.

I forced myself to regulate my breathing as I attempted to go back in time.

I still had not really spoken to many people, though. I had a duo project with one girl that I had a few study sessions with, but we had always met at a coffee shop up the road, never at my apartment.

There were a few people in several of my classes who I had seen around my building. As I continued to attempt to escape my restraints, I pictured every person that could have done this.

One girl in particular’s face came into mind. I did not know her name, but I remembered her being on my floor a lot, even though I thought she resided on a lower one. She always seemed to be in passing, so I never thought much of it. Maybe she had a friend on my floor she was visiting often?

She was in four of my six classes. We had never spoken, though.

Could she be the one that had broken into my apartment? Was she there the day that the guys were helping me move in and recognized them? Or maybe she saw them come over for one of our movie nights.

“Holy shit,” I muttered under my breath when I realized that it had been her walking down the hallway after I had kissed Chanyeol. She had not even acknowledged him as she walked by, and she had given me a warm smile.

Surely I was just overthinking things. I needed to focus on getting out of where I was before I tried to play detective. I attempted to regulate my breathing, but was unable to. My wrists were starting to bleed from my frantic pulling and twisting at the restraints.

“Is anybody there?” I knew yelling was probably worthless, but it was worth a shot. I heard nothing but a screaming silence around me. The air didn’t even feel as though it was moving.

I felt a sob welling up inside of my chest, aching to break free. I choked it down. Now was not the time to lose my composure. I stopped rolling around like a fool and used my core to pull myself into a sitting position.

I used my fingers of my right hand and slid them under the ropes around my left wrist. I hissed slightly at the contact between my finger and the burned skin. I was able to create enough of a gap between the rope and my wrist with my finger there that I was able to actually slide it free.

When my left hand came loose, the rope fell from my other hand. This little victory caused the tears to begin to flow uncontrollably down my cheeks. I could not believe I had actually managed to free myself.

I quickly undid the ropes at my ankles. I stood and ran toward the door of the barn. The fresh air slapped me in the face. I was lightheaded from my wound that was still bleeding. I only made it a bit of the way through the field next to the barn before I realized I was too woozy to run.

I forced myself to sit, followed immediately by laying down. I felt nauseous from pain. I ended up rolling to my side and throwing up. I didn’t have much in my stomach to begin with, but now I was empty.

I felt hopeless. I felt my pockets in hope that my cell phone had magically appeared in my pocket, but I knew that it was pointless. I’m sure whoever told my guard to bring me here had taken my phone into consideration.

I wasn’t sure how long I laid there. It could have been hours. It could have been minutes. Eventually, however, I heard a vehicle rolling up to the barn.

I forced myself up on my elbows and knees and slowly crawled to the edge of the field that was still tall enough to hide me. I was to ready to make my presence known yet, in case it was the person behind all of this coming to finish what they had started before they left me here.

Five tall figures jumped out of the car and sprinted into the barn. I heard a string of curse words and then my name multiple times.

When I heard one in Chanyeol’s register, joy leapt into my heart.

I cried his name it and attempted to scramble to my feet. The head rush from standing too quickly caught up to me, though, and as soon as I was upright, I was headed toward the ground again. I blacked out, but not before I, thankfully, saw my friends coming my way.

[canaryatlaw]

Okay damn it's late but it's alright cuz I can sleep in tomorrow and I took another accidental dozed off in the middle of my books naps tonight, lol. It was around 5:30 when I was like I'm just gonna rest my eyes for a few minutes, and the next thing I knew it was 9 pm, lol. Whoops. I was all around lazy today and waking and such, idk what that's necessarily about, but I was apparently unwilling to get out of bed in the morning so I convinced myself I could skip the service and just go with the babies, then sleep extra and just uber to church, so I did that and points for being lazy, lol. The nursery was pretty light, my other person did show up but then got recruited to go to the preschoolers room because they had like, 20 2-3 year olds running around and we had like, one baby at this point lol and they knew I could handle a bit more chaos than that on my own. We ended up getting 3 with another girl willing to stay with me which I appreciated of course, though I probably could've gotten through it on my own, it was very smooth, not a tear dropped by anyone the whole time, which is quite impressive I assure you. The girl who was a bit older kept going back to the gate and trying to climb it for a while (they do that a lot, we call it them trying to break out) but every time I managed to get her to come back and play. Then there was that sweet little boy we had last week that's just such a cute little chunker and he'll just sit and be perfectly happy with a toy for an entire hour, haha he was so sweet and of course no trouble. The last one was the little 6 month old girl who's the daughter of one of the ladies on the team, I've talked about her before because she is soooooo cute. She has gotten fussy in the past and we'd had to text her mom a few times, but I knew her mom had fed her right before the service so I didn't anticipate any problems and we didn't have any. I wish I could show you her cute little smile, it's just the most adorable thing. So we played with all of them, nothing too crazy. At one point I had the little girl on my lap and the older girl decided she also wanted to be on my lap haha so I had to do some shifting to make sure nobody was gonna get sat on, but other than that we managed just fine, so I'm calling that a win (really any nursery day with not a single tear shed is a major win, because that's damn near impossible really). Talked to a few people on my way out, and passed the family of the cute little girl who used to always be in the nursery with me but has now moved on to the twos, and while I was like, still a bit down the hallway she sees me and is immediately like "hi!! Hi!!!!" and waving at me and she's just the cutest little thing. At some point we're gonna end up restructuring how we split the kids up, instead of just by age we're gonna do it by mobility, so we'd have the younger babes who can't crawl or anything in one area, and then the crawlers in another and the walkers in another, hopefully all somewhat interconnected, I don't know all the details but hopefully it means I'll get to see some more of her. The way we have it now is generally fine, and the older kids are usually very gentle with the little ones, but kids still learning to walk trip and stumble and we wouldn't want them doing that onto another baby if we could help it, lol. So after that I headed home, and when I got off the train I saw I had some time before the next bus was gonna come, so I decided to take the donut shop up on their offer for half a dozen free donuts, so I got in there and asked for the manager like I'd been told, and I talked with him for a few minutes because he just really wanted to understand the situation, like he had the video footage of it but that can only explain so much. So of course I said I didn't want to get anyone in trouble and I knew it wasn't malicious or any ill-intent on their part, and I knew they had policies they had to follow, but I thought it was an oversight that could've been dealt with better and wanted to make them aware of it so hopefully next time it's handled better. So of course he thanked me for saying something and bringing it to their attention, and that they have to deal with different individuals causing trouble in the store sometimes but they would never want to actively put someone in danger so he appreciates me telling him about the situation. For the donuts, I told him he could just give me an assortment of his favorites (sans nuts of course) and so he did and I headed over to the bus stop and hopped on the bus home. It was around 3:30 at this point so I wanted to get to work, so I pulled out my stuff and kept working on my paper, trying to work on the stuff that I'd actually need for my presentation. The actual paper is up to 16 pages now and has a good amount of the substance written, it's just a matter now of coming up with things like a budget, and a strategic plan going forward and board of directors, and all that other boring shit lol but hopefully I won't need that for the presentation. I did write something up about fundraising efforts, so hopefully that will suffice for talking about the money side of things (I'm not particularly worried there, I have plenty of info to talk about so I'm not gonna run out of things to say). Apparently after two hours I passed out with my laptop still on lap (like it actually was) and woke up at 9, lol, so I called it a night for working on the project since I had everything I think I needed, and I'd just use it to create an outline since he doesn't want us reading from a paper, I figure if I have short cues about an issue I can talk about it plenty without the assistance of my paper since this is all stuff I'm super passionate about (that's the hope anyway, I'll still probably have my paper up there with me, but hopefully I won't have to use it much). While I did this and other computer stuff, I turned 13 Reasons Why on and watched episodes 6-10, and I gotta say, damn, this show is so heavy. Like, obviously I knew that going in. But the grief is just so heart wrenching to watch, especially from her parents. And I think that hits me so hard because looking back on my own teenage years I can see now what my killing myself would've done to my family, and it just would've utterly destroyed them. I have this image in my head of my mom finding my unresponsive body, hanging from the ceiling fan in my room (and I have no idea where that came from because that was never something I ever considered) and her just screaming and screaming over and over and it just haunts me to know that I could've done that to my family because I simply couldn't see past all of the despair and hopelessness that had completely taken over my life. And I can just think how happy I am that I held on. That I didn't do that to my family. That I never put them through that. I would never want to hurt my parents like that, or even my brothers- I still harbored a lot of anger towards them at that point because I felt they had ruined my childhood and were the major reason I was dealing with all of this now, I wouldn't want this to be something that haunted their entire lives when they were admittedly still kids too. I don't even want to start talking about my sister because we'll be here all night and I don't really feel like crying any more (I've shed a few tears writing this so far) and I already detailed my feelings there in my post from the other night if you are really curious. I just....for all the criticism the show is getting from the mental health community, and much of it is very valid criticism, I think they're doing a very good job of showing the effects of suicide on those they left behind. The whole blame game approach isn't really a healthy one, but I think it could definitely have an effect on a kid who's having issues, for them to see just how much her death affected everyone she left behind. As far as the actual plot, I'm very glad Clay actually leveled with his mom about his friendship with Hannah and just how much it was affecting him. I don't think we'd get this scene, but I would SO love to see Clay's mom storm into her big power fancy law firm and tell them they can take their case and shove it because she refuses to be a part of something like that. Like I don't think they'd show that but I really wish they would. It's strange though, because the lawsuit subplot wasn't in the books, and honestly for me it changes everything I want to happen at the end of this- like I find myself actively wanting the tapes to be exposed and used at the trial, and just absolutely rip the school to shreds for all the ways they failed this poor girl. I know that would have personal repercussions likely for the other people on the tapes, but that would really feel like justice for me. Now, I kinda doubt that's gonna happen because it would be a major deviation from the book and the book's general premise, but I would like to say it. Okay, I think that's most of what I had to say about it. Watched the sexual assault scene like that was horrific and could definitely be triggering for survivors, but I am glad they included it to show just how awful what they were talking about really was. Okay, I think that's really it. And that ends my day, and I could get to bed being that it's now almost 2:30 am. Goodnight my babes. Stay sweet.