#too quickly burnt out
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The transient nature of kpop hairstyles is all fun and games until you accidentally form an attachment to one in particular
#i.e ginger innie... long permed han.... mullet seungmin#but a flicker on a candle#too quickly burnt out
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second batch of artfight attacks!! top is for ~MoonyQuetarace and the bottom is for @atomic-roach !! been wanting to animate quite a bit lately so artfight's been a good excuse for that >:o]
#set up a schedule where i should have time to do attacks every other day#cuz my main issue in the past was not having a schedule and getting burnt out too quickly#this time tho i BELIEVE IN MYSELF#im about to start a new job so ill have to adjust my schedule a bit more for that but i should be good methinks#doc talks#my art#my characters#undescribed#doc's attacks#doc's animations#flashing#<<just in case
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HI HI SORRY TO BOTHER YOU BUT I HAVE TO SAY THAT I REALLY REALLY LOVED YOUR FANFIC!!! IT WAS SO TOOTH-ROTTINGLY SWEET, I ADORED IT. IT WAS SO CUTE AND I LOVE YOUR WRITING STYLE AND AHHH I LIKED IT A LOT. YOU’RE CHANGING MY WORLDVIEW AND INTERPRETATION OF THE SUZUKIS IN REAL TIME. I LOVED THAT YOU REMEMBERED LITTLE THINGS LIKE THE KITTEN, AND IT FELT LIKE YOU WERE WRITING A REAL KID. IT WAS JUST, IDK IT WAS REALLY REALISTIC AND I FEEL LIKE YOU GOT IT PERFECT. MY FAVORITE SCENE WAS WHEN SHOU AND HIS MOM FIRST CAME INSIDE, I FELT SO BAD THAT HE WAS DISAPPOINTED BUT IT WAS KIND OF FUNNY. And the way you came in with a little bit of angst right at the end? REALLY GOOD. OBVIOUSLY IT WASN’T SAD ENOUGH TO BE ANGST ANGST AND YOU KEPT IT LIGHT, AND I THINK THAT WAS JUST WHAT IT NEEDED. SO GOOD I will be reading this over and over
I do have a few questions about it. How long did it take you to write it? Which scene did you write first? Did you have any inspirations or people you’d recommend? Were there any last minute decisions that you made? If I think of more I’ll send more asks :)
Oh also: I wanted to know, are you ever going to write again? I know it’s the only fanfic you’ve ever written and I can’t imagine how hard writing them is, but I really love your writing style and if you ever did write again I would freak out
And I’m sorry you’ve been getting harassed by anons today
OH WOW HI OH MY GOD? ARGAJSIFHWKDJ YOURE NOT BOTHERING ME AT ALL, I CANT BELIEVE YOU REALLY THOUGHT IT WAS THAT GOOD?? I'm really really glad you liked it, you have no idea how happy this is making me. :DD I was on call with a friend when I got this ask, and she can confirm that I SCREAMED when I saw the notification. I'm glad you thought Shou was realistic, I was really worried about that ajekehej. AND OMG. THAT WAS MY FAVORITE SCENE TO WRITE!! IM REALLY GLAD YOU LIKED THAT ONE
1. It took me maybe two weeks? I'm not 100% sure because it's been a couple months, but that's my best guess. 2. I (shockingly) ended up writing the beginning scene first. Sort of. It was originally a narrative practice I was doing for a class I took last year, but it evolved into me wanting to actually do something with it. 3. Yeah, I did. I'm almost a little embarrassed saying who I would recommend or who inspired me, so I'll comment them after I post this or something like that. 4. Adding the kitten was a last minute decision because I had completely forgotten that the Suzukis had one until LITERALLY the day that I published it
Hopefully I will write again, because I do really like writing. I do have a couple ideas right now, but they're only half-baked outlines and I haven't been able to start on anything because I've been worried about the quality of my writing ajalsifnsk
#if you have any critiques or anything i will take them with open arms btw#sorry this is already so long so i cut it in half#Oh and dw about the anons. I usually like getting the stupid ones too#I was just in kind of a bad mood today#as much as i appreciate that you want to read it over and over agsin#you probably shouldnt do that too many times too quickly in case you get burnt out
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thinking about fallout 4 against my will
#random thoughts#fallout#unfortunately nora compels me#the fact the 'hi honey!' tape specifically mentions her 'shaking the dust off' her law degree is interesting#like she gave up her job to stay at home with her husband and kid. why?#like that's a whole year. at LEAST.#love the idea of nate pressuring her into it <3 maternity leave turns into 'isnt it so nice being with sean around the clock?'#'too bad you won't have this quality time when you return to work'#turns into 'you can always return to work if you feel like it but we DO have a lot saved up . . .'#and it's like. okay so fallout 4 would be so much better if it were set in the 1960s. literally no reason it shouldnt be#yknow beyond complying with lore which. it isnt that faithful to in the first place#i just think it's weird the game is like 'here's the FUTURE' and then it's like 'here's the FUTURE FUTURE'#anyway make it the 1960s. give me time-appropriate fucked up family dynamics#and nora's a laywer and a feminist who promised herself she'd never compromise her career for a man#and nate seemed so NICE and like he understood until uh oh. frog in a slow cooker#and he makes everything seem like it's her idea until she's barefoot in the kitchen with a screaming baby on her hip and burnt food in a pan#and she doesn't even realize she's trapped until it's too late. isolated from friends and family#idk ill do more research later to make it more time-accurate (ESPECIALLY interested in second-wave feminism)#anyway i think she cheats. with a door-to-door salesman selling places in the bomb shelters#(honestly probably the only adult social interaction she's had in weeks beyond her husband)#i like to think at some point she had a bit of a car accident due to the stress so nate took her keys#probably just a minor fender bender he blew out of proportion but she believes it because oh god what if she hurt sean#her feelings toward sean are complicated. i dont think she quite loves him which she feels guilty about so she overcompensates#with trying to keep him as safe as possible and she feels like he KNOWS and HATES her#(honestly when the bombs drop everything happens so quickly and when she's in the future and registers sean's gone she feels. so relieved)#(followed by heavy shame)#nate sabotaged her birth control btw. love evil 1960s patriarchs#never outright stated but heavily implied!#anyway nora in the future (while she felt very progressive for her time) feels very out of place#like her ideals have no place. like she has no place
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The fact that there's not a SINGLE edit of Chilchuck with "Bitches" from MSI is criminal
I'm gonna search some capcut templates hold on
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Cooking isn't even hmthat hard now if I only learn how to properly season then I might actually be good at this
#cooked myself some something for lunch and I mean. it's not bad. not bad at all#could've used more wine though#my whole exposure to seasoning has been 'just throw it in there you don't need to measure or follow a scheme'#which. this thing has honey as well as curry as well as Kurkuma as well as sesame oil and butter in it#and a shit ton of pepper#would've thrown chili in there too if we had that in the house right now but apparently we're out of it#what else ....garlic I threw garlic in there too#and some red wine on accident#intended to use white but well i didn't find that one#and milk to thin it down when the cream got thick#onions too you cpuld taste those I think I accidentally burnt them#did I mention the honey#it's genuinely a good looking thing and it tastes well as well but it's pretty mediocre#next time I'll throw some chicken in as well that usually adds a Lot#the broth really didn't substitute which I suppose isn't the intent but you know. experiments.#i was debating if I should add some walnuts too but then that idea quickly vanished when I noticed we haven't any here anyways#could've worked out though I believe in the walnuts
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hate hate hate how i either dedicate my time to studying and reading or studying and writing or studying and drawing and even if I neglect studying I still only have time for reading and writing or reading and drawing or writing and drawing never the three of them nevermind the four of them
not to talk about playing the piano or the flute. or playing videogames. or baking
#and I'm not even working yet 🧍#theoretically i could organize my time to fit everything in#but my brain would not follow it#and i would get burnt out pretty quickly too#🧍🧍🧍🧍🧍🧍🧍🧍
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Guess who almost deleted his 4k word long Serennedy fic with no back up😌
ANYWAY I wrote another Serennedy fic, just need to proof read it a copious amount of times as per usual 😍
#I have too many Serennedy and Chreon fics floating around my poor brain#I need to stop writing fics so fast#(or fast for my standards anyway)#bc I’m inevitably going to get burnt out very quickly hchdbbd#but that’s a future me issue✨#my writing
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me: i am going to start my personal new year by trying out this brownie recipe i saw online. then we'll have a nice cake for later anyway (accidentally burns the first batch of butter but the rest goes by fine) yaaay oven time
my evil fucked up narsty oven: you know what this house hasnt had in a while?
A Fire
#luckily i was In the kitchen the whole time soon as i smelled burnt i took it out and we just had to deal with a lot of smoke#i cant take this life anymore im turning into the fucking joker. this is why 27 year olds have to be at the club#i simply do not understand this appliance even with delayed 'preheat the oven' it overheated way too quickly#i only trust my mini oven. or toaster oven whatever the fuck its called.#but alas! the pan did not fit into the mini oven.#my eyes are still burning a bit but im fine otherwise. drink water etc.#tldr theres sometihng genuinely broken with our regular oven and i forgot to take it into account#and preheated it. you cannot preheat it you canaaaur not this one. it will be at 100ºC and it will burn your chicken to shreds if its in#there for more than 5minutes.#sugar.txt
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Im to the point where dying feels like my only option again
#I don't even remember my last episode too#I don't remember how to pull myself out or how to ride it out without completely fucking myself#I need to figure something out very fucking quickly#I'm so burnt out#I can't even do homework anymore and that's what's making me panic#is because once assignments start showing as missing or get graded bad bc I half-assed them is when shit hit the fan#and then everything will just get worse#Anyways I have class in two minutes can't wait to panic attack my way through it
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well... shit... guess who sprained her wrist because she overworked and overexerted it???? 🙂
#kelin talks#kelin's ramblings#also got burnt a little on my forearm with boiling water because my boss wants things done quickly#and fuck our health as long as he gets his fucking money lmfao#plus i think my right ring finger and pinky are sprained too because i can't move them without feeling pain all over to my knuckles 🥲#the only good thing of today is that i got out of work on time and i started writing a new dabi piece 😚💜
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Which number tastes the most like popcorn
I usually don't have tastes associated with things like numbers, so I had to think about it for a while...
In the end, my brain was drawn either six or ten. Not sure why, especially since I haven't eaten popcorn in ages!
( ... hopefully you were asking for my taste and this wasn't a riddle or some sort-)
#asks#you want an answer- I deliver!#i haven't eaten a lot of popcorn in general to be honest#ate it like once or twice at the movies#and like once or twice at home- usually burnt and out of a microwave bag#which wasn't great.#the cinema popcorn was good though!#it dissapears all too quickly
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Finding a fandom to join is hard nowadays...when you finally do find smtg you like, it turns out the fandom is either dead, inactive or too small there's barely any crumbs...
#random ramblings#used to be in a very active fandom but had to leave bc I can no longer support it#now i can't write for anything bc the characters there were my only muse#& writing an original thing...well let's say I'm burnt out from writing my own thing...#glad no one will see this lol#also prolly I'm just too picky now??#Lots of plot for shows & games don't catch my fancy...#or more of it doesn't catch my fancy enough...doesn't make he hyper fixate or think abt it enough...#does this count as venting? Prolly lol...#personal vent#also lots of games are kinda p2w now#as in you literally cannot do anything or much when you're f2w...even grinding sometime either don't help or burn you out too quickly#sadge
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feeling bad again 😧
#egg boils#i was reading that japanese writers hoshimina stuff and they kept saying they felt burnt out bc of how small the audience was and like . Oh#my god i get it i get it nodding emoji bc there’s only so much you can write for urself…#i think at this stage i’m just so in my head . but realistically by now i should be accepting that kn8 anime has ended. no ones actively#looking for hoshimina stuff because they aren’t pushed past the tachikawa base raid anyway. so like. Stop Hoping#idk why i think people will keep reading or looking for hsmn (Or worse. nrmn) when there’s no reason for people to so#deep breaths. i’ll just do what i want to do.#maybe i should disable ao3 notifs#or just let it pass… i think maybe i should quickly upload all the chapters for nrmn instead bc i keep Expecting things and i don’t like it#bc i always end up with greater disappointment#:/#the thing is im rly clinging onto this hyper fixation and writing so much bc i know i won’t be able to when i land a job. and thats def#happening minimally in september#i hope so anyway#so i want to create as much as i can because very soon i won’t have time for Anything but#i’m just so sad#idk anymore ughhhhh#i did have fun. but maybe i should just let this go.#the worse part is that the hsmn fic im writing rn is genuinely! going! i’m not forcing myself or anything but idk i’ve really started#placing too much like. Emphasis on recognition i guess?#i need to remind myself that the reason i managed to churn out 43k for hsmn at first was solely for myself too#i never expected anyone to read it. so i need to maintain those expectations#i truly love all the people who consistently comment on my fics and new chapters but i don’t expect people to keep up with it especially#knowing kn8 isn’t a Big Thing anymore#so i’ll need to live with the fact that i will Not get new things new comments and whilst i love seeing them and replying to them. That’s#fine. because when i was writing for myself the only person who was reacting was myself#and that’s fine!!!!!!!!!#ugh#i can do this.#just until it naturally phases out. there’s so many things i want to create still
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Finally started a reading Wuthering Heights 😊
#it's an achievement bc I do most of my reading on my lunch breaks and I cannot bring my copy of WH to work#too old and fragile for backpack life#but I'm in like. a good mood about reading this week bc I flew through this week's lunch break book super quickly#so fuck it.#we're reading at home for once#healing my burnt out english major soul :)#invasion of the frogs
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#staring at today's $460 vet bill#and Suzy needs to go for a follow-up next week too#I think I need to just. fucking. push myself to write in literally all my spare time#and just Ignore How Burnt Out I Am#and Hope That I Can Publish Quickly Enough To Be Making A Difference#wish that I was able to Offer Commissions or something which like#if anyone wants a writing commission yeah sure I'll gladly do that I just haven't really seen that be much of a thing#legit-legit if anyone knows anyone who wants math tutoring#That I Can Hella Do
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