#too big to be a jockey sfth

[svnnyd4ys]

updated SFTH family tree!

i've created a new post so that it is easier for me to explain all the little bits and bobs involved :)

thank you to not-an-idiot for helping me and for the amazing ideas!! (idk if they're okay with being tagged, but i hope that you see this :) )

here's the overview, more details under the cut!

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"Big-Dick" has been Arthur's nickname for all his life, and it's his pen name. He is the main source of any and all 'powers' within the family, as he is also able to traverse across the astral plane (he's either immortal or a time traveller, but either way, he dedicates his books to his great-grandson - Samuel 'Big-Dick' Babb-Dailey, which is )

Jonas Langbrook is the manor owner from 'Too Big to be a Jockey'. He loves his nieces on Thomasin's side (Samantha and Sally) and encourages Samantha to spend more time out of the Xavier household by inviting her to come and help in the stables. This is where Samantha and Egbert meet for the first time.

Earl changes his last name because he is ashamed to be associated with his family, especially after Jonas' antics... He is the father from 'Priscilla's Final Petal'.

Annabelle is Priscilla's biological mother, and the child of Inga and Hugh from Marigolds, Bluebells and Hugh (which I haven't watched in ages so if this is incorrect pls tell me!!)

(feasibly, she could be adopted and they are just raising her together bc of societal standards at the time, am not saying it has to be romantic!!)

Samuel is the protagonist from Beetroots & Murder - Samantha and Egbert die when he is young, Sally/Earl are unable to take him in so he gets adopted and moves to Somerset with his adoptive parents, Cyrus and Summer Setchell.

He becomes a single father to James Babb-Dailey (the father from 'The Neighbour's Under The Bed') who is the father of Johnny and Janae, which explains the future dreams. (and if Samantha and Egbert die in a fire, then it kind of adds to the lore)

[dawn-speckled]

just watched too big to be a jockey for the first time and it's so funny, such an underrated longform!!

it doesn't quite have the plot quality of the newer ones but it feels very pleasantly low-stakes and silly, you're just there for the laughs - definitely a comfort play :))

[youling-the-ghost]

In my sfth cinematic universe, Peter Steven, the children from The Neighbour's Under the Bed, and the son from Too Big To Be a Jockey are all in a support group for traumatised youth. The Sisyphus kid is also a frequent visitor.

[practicedvmm13fullofpotatoes]

All of sfth's improvized plays described by someone with bad/selective memory (but remembers 90% of the sentences they make up) pt. 2

6) Too Big To Be a Jockey

Something about a horse being split in half because its rider is too big. Also, children having guns pointed at them and an entire skin suit (literal skin) that a child (who was supposedly dead) was wearing

7) The OOPSIE DAISY Bulge

Tom saying oopsie daisy somewhere round the start (does he even say it? I don't know). I don't even remember this one but I swear I watched it

8) The Hare Who Wore a Sweater

Husband mad at wife for caring for the hares. Husband goes to bar. German woman flirts with him ("do you know how many orifices a woman has? A German woman has more!"). Barkeep gives him a drink called Be Careful™. Some time before or after that, Barkeep tries to slut-drop, falls, gets caught by the husband (and the guys on the sidelines). Wife gives a talking hare a sweater ("a moment of peace in the void") and the hare tries to tell her about the upcoming danger (Mcginnery) but then gets shot a little later ("Bingo!"). "What happened to your hare?", wife accuses husband of shooting Jimmy the hare immediately after the husband said he didn't. Car chase scene where both Mcginnery and his assistant seem to be driving (even the characters comment on this). Husband slut-drops to prevent Mcginnery from pressing the detonator for the mines surrounding the village (?). The hares have a meeting some time before or during the previous scene and go to deactivate the mines. They later appear and get mad at the wife because she claimed to have deactivated the mines herself then snaps at the hares because she "fucking nit [them] sweaters"

9) Once Upon a Time I Killed Mum

DANGERFIELD! And something about bring your kid to work day at the station ("Rapier :D!")

10) The Midnight Mystery

Lord and Lady Lafaytte are interrogated about the murder, they say they were busy making love at the time. Head king of the police accidentally summons Scottish Batman (and Robin) and tells him to fuck off. Something something Robin gets kidnapped, Lord Lafayette ends up doing a Bane thing

Prev // Next

[goingroundincircles-ontrack]

Part 2 of my sfth improvised play reviews, which is back by popular demand (only one person asked for a part 2)

The Dark Moons of Slough 10/10

As a person who grew up watching British cookery shows I really enjoyed this one. I love wizard Ascaroth's ringtone and the fact that Jamie Oliver sounds incredibly sinister. The soups causing flashbacks was a stroke of genius and also the idea that Mary Berry is the most powerful witch in the uk is amazing (I think she'd beat Jamie Oliver in a fight without magic powers anyways)

Too Big To Be A Jockey 7/10

Don't get me wrong, it's a really good play but I'm just not enamoured with it. There are some bits I really love like Tom going "ah so that's the kind of character I am" and the reuniting of the brothers at the end but it's just not my favourite of their plays. Also Sam's Irish accent is atrocious.

The Lighthouse 9/10

I laughed so much whilst watching this one. The plot is so abstract and I love it. The idea that the sheep get distressed by having the curtains drawn on the lighthouse is hilarious and I love Sam's character of the inbred sheep that's vaguely human and also does drugs. I also cannot stop hearing Sam just bleating "sex" in answer to luke's question. The ending is chaos, which I enjoy, and the whole play is great.

So that's 3 more reviews. Again lmk what you think but I'm enjoying writing these.

Part 1

[youling-the-ghost]

This reminds me of the time when I was sore from exercise so laughing made my abdomen hurt. My dumbass was like "let's watch some sfth! :D" as if making people laugh isn't the SOLE PURPOSE of their youtube channel.

Anyways, I ended up watching Too Big to be a Jockey and The Cardboard Stegosaurus. The pain was worth it.

Throwback to that one time i tried watching a sfth play w a jaw infection and ended up making it worse bc i was laughing too much

[svnnyd4ys]

previous post here <3

(is arthur a reference to Arthur BD? who's to say) (is Egbert's last name a reference to Justin Willoughby from Beetroots and Murder? who knows)

(Jonas is the manor owner; Earl is the Earl of Saxony; Thomasin is the mother)

but here's a rough idea of what I was talking about, i really hope it makes sense

and if anyone has any other characters they think could fit in, let me know :)))

[svnnyd4ys]

it'd require a lot of rejigging of the timelines, (and messing with the actual canon) but i just love the idea of the Xaviers from TLW and The Earl of Saxony from PFP being related somehow

throw in the owner of the manor (idk his name </3) from Too Big to be a Jockey bc could you imagine your entire family has all of this supernatural shit going on- and you just have someone who's too big to be a jockey

[svnnyd4ys]

some sfth plays as Richard Siken poetry quotes bc i love combining my interests sorry guys

might do a version where it's characters with very specific ones, but for now the plays!! these quotes make the plays seem much sadder than they are lmfaoo

plays 1-10 under the cut~

OMG, IS THIS A JOKE? "It starts with bloodshed, always bloodshed, always the same running from yourself story," (driving, not washing - Crush)

THE MERINGUE HABERDASHERY "I woke up and ate ice cream in the dark, hunched over on the wooden chair in the kitchen, listening to the rain. I borrowed your shoes and didn't put them away." (i had a dream about you - Crush)

LOST IN YOUR EYES "I thought of myself as a city and I licked my lips. I thought of myself as a nation and I wrung my hands. I put a thing in your hands. Will you defend yourself?" (landscape with a blur of consequences - War of the Foxes)

THE DARK MOONS OF SLOUGH "They huddled closer, shoulder to shoulder, painted themselves in herds, all together and apart from the rest." (the language of the birds - War of the Foxes)

LONG JOHNS - STRIKE! "You're in a car. You're in the weeds again. You're on a bumpy roads and there are criminals everywhere, longing for danger." (the dislocated room - Crush)

TOO BIG TO BE A JOCKEY "A stone on the path means the tea's not ready, a stone in the hand means somebody's angry, the stone inside of you still hasn't hit bottom." (seaside improvisation - Crush)

THE OOPSIE DAISY BULGE "Our scope was much larger than I realised, which only made me that much more responsible." (detail of the hayfield - War of the Foxes)

THE HARE WHO WORE A SWEATER "The wife has a dead hand. This is earlier. She is living and her dead hands feed her pills that don't work. The boy sleeps on the roof or falls out of trees. The father works late. The wife looks out of the window and thinks, Not this." (war of the foxes - War of the Foxes)

ONCE UPON A TIME I KILLED MUM "'Cut off your head, kid. For all the good it'll do ya.' I glued my head back on. All thoughts finish themselves eventually." (landscape with fruit rot and millipede - War of the Foxes)

THE MIDNIGHT MYSTERY "He could build a city. Has a certain capacity. There's a niche in his chest where a heart could fit perfectly and he thinks if he could maneuver one into place- well then, game over." (road music - Crush)

(inside the mysterious cube is getting it's own post)

[goingroundincircles-ontrack]

Sfth tumblr I have a question related to my map project

I've come up with these answers based on the predominant accents in the play