#today i met a girl i went to school with . she recognised me immediately. i didn’t. she remembered my name. i couldnt remember hers.

[bisan-is-trying]

The world got to me and i forgot that life is supposed to be lived

[learningnewways]

Visiting the shelter

Praise the Lord, child welfare gave me and Marian permission to visit their government shelter twice a week, starting this week! Amazing! This is such an answer to prayer as I would have been absolutely guttered if they had said no. The kids in the shelter need as much love and care as they can get!

At the moment I will be going twice a week and Marian will be visiting when she can, but most likely only every week or two. So today was my first visit back after nearly a year away. There is currently one trafficking victim in the shelter, a girl who looks late teens, however she speaks very little English so I have been unable to communicate with her. Luckily Marian will be coming with me on Monday and hopefully we can support her, as trafficking is the organisation's main focus. But in the meantime, today I spent time with the babies and the other children.

When I arrived, the children were doing school work with a teacher that comes in every day which was nice to see. This was a change to last year when some of the kids went to school off-site and others didn’t go at all. Straight away I recognised quite a few of the kids. Of course there were also some new faces, but even the ones who were still not walking last time, I could recognise them. Being that they are very small children, most of them unsurprisingly didn’t remember me! But there was one child, my faaaaavourite child, Lamin, and he seemed to remember me, which was so special. He took a few seconds to look at me, then when his eyes met mine he gave me the biggest grin and reached out for my hand, which is what I would always do when I visited him. So cute.

Lamin is so adorable and has so much personality, and in the year I’ve been away his personality has just grown! He is very cheeky, adventurous, loud, welcoming and a whole lot of fun. I love his cheeky smile the most. Seeing Lamin again was bittersweet, because of course I am happy to see him and know that he is safe and well, but I am also sad that he is still living in the shelter and has not been reunited with his family or placed in a permanent home. What makes it even sadder is that I wanted to adopt Lamin, but after chatting with social welfare in New Zealand, it became clear that it was impossible. 

New Zealand has a lot of rules around who can adopt and where they can adopt from which is to ensure that children are protected from things like trafficking, but also to know they are truly orphaned when they are adopted into New Zealand. Currently there are only seven countries that New Zealanders can apply to adopt from, but the application criteria is very limiting and as a result currently only around 10 children get adopted from overseas each year. While the Gambian side of the adoption sounded straightforward, the New Zealand social welfare office shut down my plan immediately and said there was absolutely no way it could happen.

The main reason for it being so difficult for New Zealanders to adopt from overseas, is that they want to make sure that if possible, the child can be cared for by someone in their own country, so they can grow up in their own culture. While Lamin may technically be being brought up in his own country and culture, on his current life trajectory, I can guarantee it would be better if he was brought to the other side of the world to live with me.

It makes me really angry and upset that I can’t adopt Lamin or any other child from The Gambia, or basically any other country given New Zealand’s tough restrictions. It wasn’t always like this, but in recent years they have cracked down on their regulations. I understand the need for regulations, but I think it’s gone too far. There are children all around the world who are in desperate, dire conditions who need a loving family, and at the same time there are countless people wanting a child, willing to adopt, yet rules prevent it from happening. Children are literally dying while people back in New Zealand grieve over not being able to adopt. It’s actually disgusting. 

I remember when I was on the phone with the social worker who told me, rather harshly, that it would be impossible for me to adopt Lamin. I was in a state of shock and she left me speechless, which is rare for me! I couldn’t believe it, that there was nothing I could do… How could that be possible, that there was nothing I could possibly do to bring this child back to New Zealand? Rich celebrities all around the world seem to do it, but not in New Zealand, or at least not these days. I don’t know if the people who make these rules have even been to a country like The Gambia and spent time with kids like Lamin and the millions of others like him around the world. Gaaaaah it makes me so mad!

Anyway, after seeing Lamin briefly, I spent some time with the babies too, helping the staff to change their nappies, feed them and give them lots of cuddles. In one room in the baby area, there were ten babies sleeping in seven cots, meaning some had to share. Once they are fed and have their diaper changed, sometimes the staff will play with them or hold them, but more often than not, they just put them back in their cots where they cry themselves to sleep. At one stage today, I was carrying two newborn babies, one on each shoulder, while the staff sat on their phones and did nothing. I know that they do work, but whenever I’m there, it certainly seems like I do much more work than they do. There are some staff that I can tell actually do care about the children, but for others it’s just a job.

About a month after I left The Gambia, my friend told me that she had visited the shelter on a Monday and discovered that no one had been in to see the children all weekend. No one. Not a single staff member showed up to feed them, change them, hold them… I don’t know how it is possible that no one could have noticed… But unfortunately, this had fatal consequences.

I don’t know what to do about it all. I cannot let children die in this place, but I don’t work there and I’m not a trained nurse or children’s worker, so I cannot tell them what to do. Even when I’m living here in The Gambia, I only want to visit the shelter once or twice a week, because I don’t want the staff getting so used to me being here that they rely on me. Even today, only two staff showed up. Two staff for 15 babies is not enough. Part of me wonders if I should start an orphanage of my own here, but then I remember that once again, I am not trained in that area at all! Also, I am only one person. It would take a whole team of people and plenty of funding to do that. Marian finds it hard enough trying to find good staff for Samaritana. Plus, life is hard here. It’s hot, I don’t speak the language. I don’t know the culture. Surely I would be better suited doing ministry back in New Zealand with people I can relate to?

But then I also think, if not me then who? Who is caring for these children? If I come back in another five years, what if these children are still there? Or even worse, what if there are more fatalities? I know it’s not my responsibility, but now that I know what goes on, how can I just go home and do nothing? Even if I was to fundraise and send them money, provide for their basic needs… No one is doing the most important thing which is loving these children. No one is cuddling them, holding them when they cry, pulling funny faces at them for a laugh. No one is praying for them, telling them about Jesus Christ and the hope we can have in Him.

Their situation is not just awful. It’s absolutely horrific. And I don’t know what to do about it.

The irony is that I’m not even a baby person! I’m not maternal, I don’t feel like I’m that great with kids. I love working with youth and young adults, but I’m not a natural when it comes to children. I’ve learnt how to work with them. But yet my heart is so broken for these children, many of whom I just met for the first time today. They are so small they can’t speak, walk or do anything for themselves. Who will stick up for them? Who will notice if they are hurt? They are some of the most vulnerable people in the world. I often wonder how many deaths go unrecorded and unnoticed in the shelter, because the children are orphaned or abandoned anyway… I know they don’t go unnoticed to God.

I don’t want to just complain about it or make other people feel sad by reading this. I want to make change, a real change. I just don’t know how.

[landoncrris]

Could you write something where you've known mason since you were a kid through your brother and he's always had a crush on you and you haven't seen him in a while and now you're both older he confesses and makes a move. Thank you! I love your writing! :)

thank you so much anon!! hope it meets your expectations <3

secret admirer - mason mount x reader

notes: i kinda wrote more verbatim speech this time and less details? so idk if that’s good too,, we’ll see i guess

word count: 1.2k

“Oh my God, Y/N?” someone said near you as you visited one of the bakeries in your neighbourhood, as you had done every morning since you were little. It became a kind of routine to get the same coffee before you went to work - or to school when you were younger. When you looked up, you caught sight of your brother’s old childhood friend, “Mason?”

“I never thought I’d see you again!” He beamed as he sat down across from you at the small table. “Damn, you’ve changed so much I almost didn’t recognise you” laughing at the fact that he met you in the same bakery you went to together all the time many years ago.

“Didn’t think you’d remember me”

“Oh, come on, as if I could ever forget a face like that.” you blushed slightly at his comment, thoughts of him as a child running through your mind, as well as all the times you went to school together or when you were at your brothers and Mason’s football practice, always cheering them on. And because Mason was one of your brother’s best friends, you also became something like friends, although you never had a real connection, the only one being your brother.

“You’ve changed a lot too, I mean from the little boy with the long hair and braces to this,” you said as you motioned him up and down, eliciting a shy laugh from him. “Is that a good thing or a bad thing?” asked Mason with his usual grin, which you recognized immediately as it didn’t change at all.

“Definitely a good thing” causing him to raise his eyebrow at you and making you question what you’ve just said, “Not that you didn’t look good then, but I mean— you look older now, out of puberty” mentally slapping you for acting so awkward in front of him, instead he thought it was cute to see you blush and get nervous, like he always had thought. You always had this special way about you, just being different from everyone else, but in a positive way. And he couldn’t help but see in you the girl he stupidly had a crush on years ago, as your smile was the same one and still made his eyes light up.

“Anyway, what are you doing here? My brother mentioned that you moved away?” You take a moment as he speaks to sip your coffee and sort out your thoughts. “Oh yes, I did, though not far away. And I’m here to visit my parents, so I thought I’d bring my mum this cake she loves so much.”

“She still does?”

“Absolutely, wants it for every fucking birthday of hers.” which pulled a laugh from you as you remembered that he never liked that specific cake his mother always got when they visited. “Shit, I already have to go, can’t be late for work..” you said with a quick glance at your phone, only now realising that you had been sitting in the bakery for far too long.

“Oh... where’s your workplace?” Mason asked you, not wanting to end the conversation yet as he got up and pushed the chair back under the table while you put on your jacket. “Basically just down the road, have to walk for about 20 minutes.”

“Walk?”

“Yeah, I can’t afford a car yet, but it’s actually nice to walk there, it gets me moving a bit.” you smiled as he still looked stunned to hear that you walk to work every day.

“Not today. I’ll drive you there, just give me a minute to get the cake for my mother” Mason went over to the till and ordered everything he needed. “I’m fine with walking too, you don’t have to do that.”

“But I want to. If you want that too?”

“Sure. Thank you” sending him your lovely smile as he opened the door for you and let you walk past him, out of the bakery and away from the sweet smell of pastries. “No problem”

“Soo, I guess that car over there is yours?” pointing to the only clean and prosperous-looking car on the road. “Wonder how you could have guessed that” he grumbled as he opened the car and you both got in.

“How does it feel?” you murmured, which made him furrow his brows as he started the engine and signalled you to enter the address. “How does what feel?”

“Having thousands of girls on their knees for you” pulling a snort from him, “You say that as if I didn’t have them back when i was 18 already.” Mason laughed in the same cocky tone he had back then.

“I certainly didn’t have a crush on you,” you looked over at him instead of looking out the window and saw his lips tilt up slightly, “Oh, as if.”

“Listen, Mount, not every girl in this world fancies you.”

“I did”

“You did what? Fancy yourself?”

“You—” he said as his voice broke with embarrassment and his cheeks flushed, somehow wishing he had kept his mouth shut but his ego was bigger than that. “I had a crush on you.” his statement made you gasp overdramatically but your insides burned with excitement because you couldn’t lie that he looked ridiculously hot and was apparently still the polite guy you knew, which you always appreciated about him. “No way, seriously?!”

“Of course, I mean, have you looked at yourself? I’d be an idiot if I didn’t have a crush on you.” he stopped at a red light and gave you a look that made you bite your cheeks to suppress the feverish smile when he did. “Anyway. How’s your life going in general at the moment?” Mason asked as he looked back down the road and quizzed you about your life for the rest of the ride.

“Thank you so much for driving me.” you thanked him after he parked the car in front of your workplace and you reached for the car door. “Wait, wait, wait” Mason said as he got out of the car, making you stop your movement. Chuckling to yourself as he walked over and opened the car door for you, “What a gentleman”

“Oh, and here...” he handed you his phone, on which a new contact was opened, named after you, before telling you to enter your number. “There you go.” you said after handing him back his phone.

“Thanks. We could meet up later this week if you want. I don’t know we could get something to eat… watch a movie...”

“A date?”

“Yeah, I mean— if that’s what you want, of course, otherwise we’ll just skip the movie part.” he muttered to himself, which made you grin, because you had that effect on him that made him nervous, and that certainly didn’t happen often. “I would love to go on a date with you”

“Great!” letting out a nervous laugh, trying to hide his excitement, “I mean, okay. Cool, I’ll text you then.” he corrected himself before pulling you into a hug and saying goodbye to each other, a grin on his face for the rest of the day as he was about to have a date with his teenage crush.

[mandoalorian]

The Nanny [Maxwell Lord x Dave York x F!Reader] SMUT

Summary: Dave York is cold and rough around the edges, but he’s all you’ve ever been used to. And you’ve never been opposed to the amazing sex that comes alongside working for him, as a nanny for his two young daughters. However, things seem to spice up when you’re requested to watch over none other than Maxwell Lord’s son, and the two meet in an unlikely situation.

Rating: 18+

Warnings: SMUT; threesome, unprotected piv, fingering, male receiving oral, female receiving oral, orgasm denial, creampie, cunnilingus, choking, slapping, use of handcuffs, use of vibrator (on Maxwell!), face fucking, degradation kink, voyeurism kink, praise kink, food mention, allusions to murder/missing person. The suburban murder daddy and my sexy capitalist boyfriend come with their own warnings ;)

Word Count: 7000>

Masterlist

REBLOGS ARE SO APPRECIATED. 💛

He was your best customer. You’d been a nanny for the York family for two years now, and Alice and Molly were sweetest children you’d ever worked with. They were good as gold, always doing their homework to the best of their ability, they had wonderful manners thanks to their parenting, and they played nicely together. However, you’d be lying if you said you didn’t have a second motive for babysitting the girls.

Dave York was a single father. Despite being close to the family, you never asked what happened to Carol (his ex-wife/Alice and Molly’s mother), you assumed it was a touchy subject and quite frankly, none of your business. It did pique your curiosity though, how she had just seemed to vanish into thin air. It was unexplained, and you assumed it was hard on the family, especially the kids. Although Dave had been handling it quite well all things considered. It was strange to you, how they never spoke a word of her. She was truly an enigma. You saw her face in the very few family portraits that were peppered around the house, but that was all.

When Carol disappeared two years ago, Dave figured he’d need an extra pair of hands to help around the house while he was at work. You had your own place, sure, but you practically lived with the York family anyway. You had the mornings and early afternoons to yourself because Molly went to school, Alice got sent to daycare and Dave went to the office, but it was at night when he needed you the most.

You didn’t know where Dave went at night. He’d call you, once or twice a week on short notice, telling you he needed you to watch the girls. Whatever he was doing, he called it business, and didn’t explain it further. Dave was super accommodating to you, immediately telling you that you could just make yourself at home in his beautiful, extensive sized suburban house. He was like family to you. In fact, he was more. Dave relished in his own independence, but the truth was, he relied on you more than he’d like to admit.

You had your own room-- a soft, plush queen sized bed all to yourself. He even let you decorate. You smiled fondly at the memory of getting the girls to help paint the walls with you while their father was out on a ‘job’ one night. Your smile grew even wider when you remembered hearing the front door open in the early hours of the morning, and shuffling about downstairs. Every time Dave would come home, he’d slide into your bedroom and climb on top of you, smelling suspiciously like blood and sweat (although you knew better than to question it). His demeanour was ravenous and primal as he’d slide his thick, calloused fingers along your body. He’d push your nightgown up, squeeze your thighs, lift your legs up and wrap them around his waist. You were fucking him, sure. And you had been for the past two years. He was the most attractive man you’d ever met, with dark hair and big brown eyes. He was rough around the edges, intimidating, but it only spurred you on even more. Of course, nothing was ever made official. You were nothing more than his daughters’ nanny, just lucky enough to have your own bedroom in the York family home.

Dave was your only source of income, and he provided you with enough to get by. You never requested a large sum of money for watching the girls-- to be honest, you’d be satisfied enough with just the sex, but the pay was decent. You hadn’t really gotten any other babysitting jobs, and when you had, you’d deny them for the sake of keeping Dave in good spirits. You’d favour him over any client. Except today.

Your phone rang and you dived into your purse to answer it. The girls were playing on the floor and Dave was buttoning up his winter coat. “Hello?” you answered, not recognising the number.

“Yes, hello,” a feminine voice replied. “This is Raquel, I’m an assistant to Mr. Maxwell Lord, the CEO of Black Gold Cooperative.”

Your eyes practically bulged out of your head upon recognising the name. “The oil guy from TV?!” you gasped, slapping your hand over your mouth in disbelief. Dave turned to you, quirking an eyebrow as he tried to gauge your reaction.

“As you may know, Mr. Lord is an esteemed businessman and well, he saw your advertisement in the paper saying you were a nanny-for-hire.” Raquel trailed off before pushing straight to the point. “He has a son, Alistair, six years old. He was wondering if you could watch him tonight? We’ve tried every other nanny in the area but no one else can take him short notice.”

“I- I’m actually on a job right now…” you bit your lip nervously.

“Mr. Lord will pay handsomely.” Raquel hummed, trying to coherese you.

“Just a moment,” you placed your mobile on the coffee table and looked up at Dave, whose dark eyes were already burning into you. They hadn’t left you once. He gave you a questioning look and a shaky exhale left your lips. You didn’t know why you were this nervous -- maybe it was just the intimidating aura Dave gave off. “Uhm… you know that guy on the television with the blonde hair who sells oil?”

“Maxwell Lord.” Dave said, matter-of-factly. You were slightly impressed that Dave already knew who he was.

“Uh… yeah, well. He has a son, apparently. And he can’t get a sitter. And he’s asked for me.” Dave’s expression didn’t change once.

“And?” 

Why was your heart beating this fast? Why were you so fucking afraid of pissing Dave off?

“I-- nothing. You’re right. I’ll just tell him--” you stammered, reaching to grab your cell again.

“--tell him that you’ll take the job, I hope.” Dave’s lips curled into a smirk as he finished your sentence for you.

That was… weird. He didn’t seem jealous or anything like he’d usually be. He fiddled with the rest of his buttons on his coat before flicking his wrist out and checking the time on his watch.

“Are you-- are you sure?” you asked cautiously.

“Of course!” Dave beamed. “How old is the kid?”

“Same age as Alice.” you hummed.

“Perfect,” Dave smiled before kneeling down to kiss the forehead of his two little girls. “Daddy’s heading out now but there’s gonna be a little boy coming over to play with you. So be kind to him, okay?”

“Okay daddy, love you.” Molly smiled, wrapping her small chubby arms around her father’s neck.

“Love you too princess.” Dave chuckled and your heart gushed with warmth upon witnessing the interaction. Dave York might have been a scary man but he was a hell of a good father.

“Hi,” you said, picking the phone back up and putting it to your ear. “I can watch his kid but-- he’ll have to bring him here. Uhm… how long for?”

“One second,” Raquel hummed, holding the phone to her chest and looking over at the blonde haired businessman who was sitting at his expensive oak wood desk, neck deep in paperwork. “Mr. Lord?” Maxwell glanced up at Raquel, his eyes tired and a strand of his hair falling in his face. “She can do it but she requests that you bring Alistair over to the house she’s currently working at. And she wants to know how long she’ll have to watch him for.”

Maxwell sighed, exasperated, before looking back down at the paperwork and trying to gauge how long it would take him. “Three… four hours maybe?”

Raquel nodded her head in understanding. “Four hours max,” she promised you. “What is the address?” You gave her the address of the York homestead, watching Dave as he left the house without even muttering as much as a goodbye. Raquel scribbled down the address and handed it over to Maxwell who stood up and fixed his tie. “Thank you Ms Y/L/N, your service is very much appreciated.”

“Oh please just call me--”

And then the line went dead. That was… weird.

Maxwell grabbed his suit jacket and straightened out his clothes, grimacing at the ache in his back that he had from sitting at his desk all day. He shuffled out of his office, took the elevator downstairs, and found his son Alistair playing with a train set in the lobby of Black Gold Cooperative.

“Daddy!” Alistair cried out excitedly, shooting to his feet and running up to his father.

“Hi buddy!” Maxwell grinned, forcing out some enthusiasm as he knelt down and wrapped his arms around Alistair, pulling him into a tight hug.

“Are you finished work now? Can we go home?” Alistair quizzed, and Maxwell’s heart broke at the hopeful spark in his eyes.

“Ah-- not quite,” Maxwell admitted and Alistair’s shoulders slumped in disappointment. “But I’m going to take you over to someone’s house… a uh-- a friend! And she will watch over you until daddy finishes work. I just don’t want you to be bored, okay? Raquel is going home now and I can’t… I can’t watch you. So…”

Alistair frowned sadly. “But I don’t want to go… I want to stay here. With you.” he mumbled.

“I know sweetie, but I won’t be too late, okay? And once I’m done tonight we can spend the whole day tomorrow together. How does that sound?” 

“You said that yesterday…” Alistair whispered.

Maxwell sighed and pulled his son into an even tighter hug. “I-- I’m sorry. You know I’m doing my best, don’t you?”

“I know.” Alistair sniffed.

“And I want to give you the best life. Better than all the other kids. And better than what your old man had when he was your age. So… I have to work hard, okay? And one day you’ll get your pool that you want. And the pony and the race car…”

“I don’t want that daddy, I just want you.” Alistair confessed, his dark eyes glazed with unshed tears.

Maxwell pressed a kiss into Alistair’s forehead and pulled off him. “Okay. Go get your coat and I’ll pack up your trainset.”

“Can I take it to your friend’s house?” he questioned, his lips curling into a smile.

“Of course.” Maxwell replied.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Holy shit. He was even more attractive in real life than what he was on television. You weren’t necessarily nervous when you heard the knock on the door, but when you answered it, your heart slammed against your chest. Maxwell Lord stood before you, holding the hand of his son, but your eyes were just completely fixated on him. He donned a slightly oversized power-suit that broadened his shoulders significantly. It was a pale blue colour and even under the dark evening sky you noticed the lilac and purple tie and matching pocket square. It made you smile. It was endearing, almost.

“Good evening.” Max grinned that same, charming, TV smile that was so familiar. 

“Hi.” you sighed longingly, your eyes wide and doe-shaped as you became lost in his gaze.

He looked like a fairytale prince. His hair was styled perfectly and despite the hour, you’d never expected his designer outfit to be pressed so perfectly.

“I’m Max Lord.” Maxwell greeted.

“I know.” you hummed, biting your lip as your eyes trailed down his body.

Maxwell chuckled, finding you absolutely adorable. He cleared his throat and gently pushed a begrudgent Alistair in front of him. “This is my son, Alistair.”

“Yeah…” you murmured. Molly tugged on your arm and pulled you straight out of your thoughts about Mr. Lord. “Uhm-- shit! Right. Sorry!” you gasped, becoming flustered. “Oh fuck-- I didn’t mean to curse-- I just--”

Maxwell raised his eyebrows and gently placed a hand on your arm. “It’s okay.” he said slowly and you felt your cheeks flush with heat.

“Um…” you took Alistair’s hand and grinned. “Hi love, it’s nice to meet you.”

“Hello.” Alistair said quietly.

“Now Ali, don’t be shy.” Maxwell chastised.

“It’s okay,” you reassured Maxwell. “Uhm, this is Molly.” you presented Alistair and Maxwell with Dave’s little girl who had been standing by your side the entire time.

Alistair’s eyes lit up excitedly when he saw Molly. “Hi Molly, I’m Alistair Lorenz--Lord. Do you maybe want to be friends?”

“Hi Alistair Lord. I’m Molly York. Do you like popcorn?”

“Yes.” Alistair nodded merrily.

“Okay. We can be friends. Come with me.” Molly said, grabbing Alistair’s hand and pulling him into the house.

“I don’t have many friends…” you overheard Alistair say as the children padded into the living room and your heart shattered. He was clearly such a sweet little boy. 

“Uhm, thanks for the favour. Short-notice and all.” Maxwell said, clearing his throat and scratching the back of his neck.

“It’s honestly fine.” you assured Max.

“Okay. Good. It was uh-- nice to meet you.” Maxwell smiled, before taking your hand and brushing a soft yet polite kiss over your knuckles. His gaze didn’t break away from you once and the butterflies in the pit of your stomach were overwhelming. His soft lips against your skin felt like an electric and you couldn’t help but wonder how it would feel capturing your own lips with his.

“You too.” you gasped.

“I’ll… see you later tonight.” Max grinned, dropping your hand and straightening out his suit once more.

“Okay. Yeah. Tonight.” you replied nervously, fluttering your eyelashes.

“Good night.” Max said politely before spinning around on his heel and walking back down the lawn to his Cadillac.

“Night!” you called after him, and he waved his hand.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

As it turned out, Alistair was the sweetest little boy you had ever watched over. After Molly insisted you make popcorn, and Alice begged you to put on The Little Mermaid, the four of you were lounging on the floor in a hand-crafted pillow fortress. The conversations between the three children were endearing, to say the least.

Alice: Y/N, what do you want to be when you’re older?

You: Well, when I was little I wanted to be a veterinarian and look after all the sick animals.

Molly: That’s what I want to do!

Alice: I want to be a princess. 

Molly: What do you want to be, Alistair?

Alistair: I want to be like my dad, I s’pose.

Alistair didn’t talk much-- he definitely was shy and you could tell he wasn’t used to being around other kids, which was truly a shame. He didn’t have the communication skills that Alice and Molly had and by the sounds of it, he was living a pretty sheltered life-- private school and all. But if one thing was clear, it was how much Alistair idolised his father.

The kids played well together, all three of them dressing up as different Disney princesses. Before the movie even finished, they passed out and fell asleep on the floor. You didn’t bother carrying them to bed, not wanting to wake them. They looked comfortable enough in their LED lit castle made from blankets. So you just left them there, and changed into your own pajamas. You settled down for the evening with a glass of red wine and changed the movie to something you figured you’d enjoy more.

You found your mind wandering, thinking about the businessman whose son you were babysitting. In fact, you hadn’t even thought about Dave once. It was a welcome change. Maxwell was definitely gone for over four hours but he was so handsome, you absolutely could not stay mad at him for one moment. When the knock came at the door, at around 2a.m., you gasped and raced over to the mirror to fix your appearance the best you could. You grabbed your silk robe and wrapped it over your body before padding to the front door and unlocking it.

Maxwell greeted you with a bouquet of roses, and your jaw dropped. “Oh my--”

“These are for you.” Maxwell beamed. “An apology for being so late.”

“You really didn’t have too…” you smiled but graciously took the bouquet from him nonetheless. “Where did you even get these from? It’s so late. Nowhere’s open.”

“Don’t worry about it.” Maxwell hummed, watching you intently as you turned away from him to place the roses on the side table in the entryway.

His eyes clung to your body and he admired the way the silk robe hung against your perfect shape, emphasising the curve in your ass and even the way your nipples poked through the material. It was cold outside, afterall. When you turned back to face him, you noticed that his eyes were almost black and lust blown. You swallowed and offered him a nervous smile. 

“Alistair is asleep. Would you uhm-- like to come in? For a nightcap?”

“Yeah,” Maxwell’s response came instantly in a breathy sigh. He let himself in, pushing past you and his broad chest grazing against your own, much softer chest. “Nice place you have.”

“Oh… thanks. It’s actually not my home-- I mean, I live here but…”

“I used to live in this neighbourhood,” Maxwell muttered, nosing around the different rooms. “Before my big pay rise, obviously.”

You gulped and looked down, following him around the house. You opened the living room door. “Alistair is sleeping.” you whispered and Max just smiled. “The kitchen is this way. What do you usually drink?”

“Do you have whiskey?”

Yeah. Dave’s whiskey.

“Um yes… I think so…” you mumbled, checking the liquor cabinet.

You gasped when a strong arm wrapped around your waist and gave your hip a little squeeze. Maxwell nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck and pressed a soft kiss into your skin. “Is it okay if I do this?” he whispered, licking a stripe across your jaw.

Your eyes snapped shut as you tried to fight back a moan. “Y-yes.”

Maxwell skillfully navigated his hand to the ribbon that binded your robe together and tugged on it so the thin material fell open. His large ring clad fingers rolled over your stomach and grabbed your tits, squeezing them a few times as he nibbled down onto your skin.

“Your wife… I mean-- uhm… Alistair’s mother?” you huffed, leaning into his touch. You had to make sure.

“Divorced.” Maxwell promised, and you smiled longingly before turning around and pressing your palms flat against his chest. He chuckled darkly and pushed the robe off your shoulders, letting it fall to the tiled kitchen floor.

He swallowed upon seeing you in your short lace nightgown, that cut off mid-thigh. He felt his cock began to throb within the confines of his tailored suit pants just from looking at you. 

“So… hard day at the office?” you cooed, helping him out of his suit jacket and tugging on his tie.

“So hard.” Maxwell grumbled, biting his lip before leaning in and capturing your lips into a kiss. You moaned under his touch and pressed your body into his. His hands found your ass you began to rub your knee over his erection.

“I see,” you giggled. “Would you… would you like to see my bedroom, Mr. Lord.”

Maxwell grinned and pecked your lips. “Yeah, but please, call me Max.”

Max. 

God, you were smitten.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

You had been so caught up with Maxwell you had honestly forgotten about Dave. The same Dave who came home at around 3 a.m. every single night, who fucked you senseless until you couldn’t walk the next morning. He was a man who didn’t want to be messed with-- but shamelessly, you had completely forgotten about him. And poor Max hadn’t even got a warning. The second Dave got home and saw the discarded bouquet of roses on the side table, he saw red. Someone else trying to seduce you? That was never going to be okay with Dave. You were his and his only.

“Oh fuck Max please,” you gasped, thrusting your hips upwards as he needlily sucked on your clit. You arched your back, burying your face into your soft pillow. “So good.”

“You taste so fucking sweet.” Maxwell gasped, the curve of his nose nudging against your sensitive bud. You cried out with pleasure and grabbed a fistful of the blankets as you felt yourself begin to chase your oncoming high.

“Doesn’t she?” Dave’s deep voice came from the bedroom door, where he’d been watching Maxwell go down on you for the last ten minutes. Your heart dropped when you heard him-- and clearly, it was unexpected for Maxwell too. His chocolate brown eyes looked up at you as he tore his face from your soaking pussy. His lips were wet with the sheen from your arousal and he licked at them, relishing your flavour before turning around to face Dave.

Dave chuckled dryly. “No, please, don’t stop. I can't have you deny my nanny of an orgasm, can I?”

You felt your eyes go comically wide. “Dave I-- I can explain-”

“No need babygirl,” Dave reassured you, but his tone was dripping with malice. “Now… why don’t you show Mr. Lord how good you can be by cumming in his mouth?” 

Maxwell hummed in surprise and proceeded to press a sloppy kiss into the apex of your thigh before giving you a kitten lick between your folds. “Fuck!” you gasped, celebrating in the way his golden tongue felt like magic. He was a salesman, sure, and a persuasive one at that-- but Maxwell Lord knew how to use his tongue efficiently, that much was clear.

“Didn’t tell me you had a boyfriend.” Maxwell growled, pinching your skin between his teeth.

“I don’t.” you sighed, tossing your head slightly and reaching down to lace your fingers into the CEO’s hair.

“So who is he?” Maxwell interrogated. You held back, knowing that if you replied he might stop lapping you up. It felt too good to risk it. Maxwell plunged a thick finger into your entrance without warning, causing you to squeal at the intrusion.

“Shit!” you cried out. Maxwell steadied his finger inside of you and began to brush the digit against your sweet spot as he began sucking on your clit, his cheek even hollowing. “I can’t-- I can’t hold on. I’m gonna--”

Your orgasm struck you before you could even get the words out. The hot blaze of wildfire rushed through your body and your mind was filled with such haze you hadn’t even heard Dave discard his belt and unzip his own trousers.

Maxwell dug his fingernails into your inner thighs as you came undone in his mouth. Gently, he pulled away from you again and stood up. His eyes followed Dave who was now naked and pumping his cock by the side of the bed.

“Who are you?” Maxwell changed his tactic by asking the darker haired man this time.

“You’ll soon find out,” Dave shot back. He turned to you and raised his hand, slapping your cheek so you focused your attention on him rather than Max. Maxwell was taken aback by his action, but truth be told, sex with Dave was always on the rougher side. “Open your mouth.” Dave commanded, and you happily obliged.

Still laying on your back, you opened your mouth and stuck out your tongue. Dave pressed one knee down onto the bed next to you and pushed his cock in between your lips before fucking your mouth. Tears pricked the corners of your eyes as you adjusted to his length, and he thrusted into you with no remorse. You were used to it though, gagging around his girth and letting a mixture of your saliva and his precum dip down your face.

Maxwell’s eyes darted between you and Dave. He didn’t think he’d ever been this turned on before.

“Take your clothes off,” Dave said to Max, before groaning as you swiped your tongue along the underside of his cock. “Baby, why don’t you watch him undress.”

Maxwell stood up, even feeling slightly nervous. He shouldn’t be nervous. He’d hosted thousands of high press business meetings before, he’d even spoken at the White House and done broadcasts that had been seen by millions all around the world. He stood up and began to slowly undo the buttons down his shirt, and, just like Dave had requested, you watched him with a primal glint in your eye.

He was so hot. He wore an undershirt too. And when he took that off, it revealed a gorgeous tan chest. You watched him pull down his tailored pants and noticed the small pink blush cross his cheeks. That’s when you decided you actually, really liked Max.

You liked Dave too. Dave knew how to satisfy you in every way possible. He was always there, ready to go. And Dave was your protector. Somehow, you just knew that if anyone ever hurt you, Dave would make sure they never got the liberty of meeting you again. Dave was brutal, and certainly a little rough around the edges, but you didn’t mind it.

This thing with Maxwell though was new. He was handsome and polite. You’d never had a customer bring you red roses as a token of their appreciation before. He was flirtatious but also, so far, sex with him had been a lot sweeter and passionate. It was a new experience and you certainly weren’t opposed to it.

Once Max was completely naked, Dave’s lips curled into a smirk. “Good boy,” he cooed, and Maxwell felt his cock twitch at the appraisal. “You can use her, you know? Do whatever you want. Why don’t you fuck her?”

Of course the thought had crossed Maxwell’s mind, but he’d never got off with a woman in front of another man before. His delay in a response prompted Dave to speak up.

“I see you on TV,” Dave chuckled. “I know you’re not shy.”

That’s when Max remembered he had a reputation to uphold. Dave was right, he wasn’t shy. Maxwell Lord was powerful and he exuded confidence and charisma. He wasn’t going to let Dave intimidate him anymore.

You pulled off Dave with a wet pop and gasped for air. “He’s right Max,” you assured him, wiping your lips. “Anything you want.”

“I want a blowjob,” Maxwell shrugged casually. Dave quirked an eyebrow. 

“From me or her?” He asked incredulously and Maxwell felt his cheeks heat up even more.

“Her obviously!” Maxwell said, his voice heightening an octave and you burst out into a fit of laughter.

“Okay,” you agreed and gave Dave a tug on his dick. “Change positions.”

Still hard, Dave padded over to the end of the bed and Maxwell knelt next to you.

“You’re so big Maxie,” you hummed, wrapping your fingers around the base of his cock and starting to jerk him off slowly. Your pace was teasing, but Maxwell didn’t press you to go further. He knew you would in your own time. The nickname ‘Maxie’ had the blonde haired man throb in your hands and you giggled, pressing a sweet kiss to his tip.

Dave turned around from the bed for just a second, and opened the bottom drawer of your dresser. He knew you kept a box of very special toys underneath all your panties, since he was the one who had bought them for you in the first place. Opening the velvet black box, he sighed in delight, reflecting on all the different things he could use.

Dave took out a pair of padded handcuffs and presented them to both you and Maxwell, the metal chain dangling before your eyes. He passed the cuffs to Max and pointed his finger.

“Tie her to the bed. It’ll keep her still while I fuck her.” Dave ordered and you felt your pussy clench around nothing as you anticipated what was to come.

“Are you alright with this?” Max leaned into you and whispered, wanting to be sure. His hot breath fanned over your earlobe and it sent a shiver down to your core. You nodded your head ‘yes’ and Maxwell unclicked the cuffs before carefully attaching them to your wrists, and then the bars of your headboard. You wiggled around, getting comfortable before spreading your legs wide for Dave.

You already felt yourself becoming increasingly sensitive from when you’d just come from Max’s tongue, but countless experiences with Dave meant that you could go at least another two or three times.

“Shit baby,” Dave muttered under his breath, drinking in the sight of you. Your folds were glistening and it was clear that Max’s thick finger had already stretched you open quite a bit. “You’re beautiful.”

“Come on and fuck me,” you moaned before turning to face Max again.

This entire time you’d been stroking his length, and like a good boy, he’d just been taking it. But Max had asked for a blow job and that was exactly what he was going to receive.

You started by giving him small kitten licks along his slit, collecting his salty precum on your tongue. You had to admit, he tasted delicious. He was thick though, thicker than Dave, and you managed to wrap your lips around just his head before feeling the need to take a moment to let your mouth adjust.

As you sucked on his tip, part of you wished that you weren’t cuffed to the bed. You would have brought your free hand down to the base of his cock and begin to cradle his balls, squeezing them and tracing your fingers along the skin there. The guttural whimpers that escaped Max’s throat were enough to soak your cunt again, which was just as well when you started to feel the bulbous head of Dave’s cock teasingly slide between your pussy lips.

The shock when Dave slid his entire length inside of you came without a warning, and somehow, it got you to open your mouth even wider so you could fit more of Max into your mouth. You supposed it all worked out.

The sound of the chain clanking against the metal bed frame filled the room as Dave began to thrust his cock in and out of you, his movements fast and rough just like always. He pulled your legs over his head, giving him complete access to sink himself right into you. You wanted to scream as he filled you up, his cock brushing against that sweet spot he had memorised inside of you every damn time.

Instead, you forced yourself to keep your cool and continued sucking off Max. You made the effort to open your eyes and look up at the boy who you had wrapped around your lips. His once styled hair was now disheveled and falling into his face, and you had to fight the urge to push it back. His chocolate brown eyes were on Dave though as he watched the man fuck you fast and hard. Dave’s pace was bruising and you knew that you wouldn’t last long.

Dave could tell you were close by the way your pussy walls clenched around him, aching to milk him of his seed.

“Want me to cum inside of you, pretty girl?” Dave asked, and you nodded your head desperately. 

“Jesus-- fuck!” Max gasped, his large ring clad hands coming down to hold your head in place. 

“You gonna cum down her throat, Lord?” Dave quizzed, but there was almost a taunting nature to his question that Max didn’t like one bit.

Getting a few more sucks out of you, Max doubled back and pulled himself out of your mouth completely, depriving himself of his own orgasm. You were surprised to say the least.

“You could’ve-- fuck-- you could’ve cum down my throat,” you moaned as Dave leaned over your fully exposed body and thrusted harder. “I would’ve let you.”

But Maxwell’s eyes had caught focused on the velvet black box Dave had left out. Curiously, he wandered over to it and took a look at the contents for himself.

While Max was momentarily absent, Dave made it his mission to get you to cum again. He brought his thumb down to your clit and began to rub tight circles into your sensitive bundle of nerves. You were so wet, the noises that were coming from your cunt were obscene and if you weren’t already so comfortable around Dave, you might have been embarrassed. His thrusts became sloppy and erratic as he started to chase his own high.

He knew that the second you came, the second your perfect pussy tightened around his cock, he’d spill inside of you. So that was his goal.

Maxwell familiarized himself with a small bullet vibrator, silver in colour, and switched it on. The buzzing noise alerted both you and Dave, your heads snapping to face him. Dave halted in his movements and you couldn’t hide the way your lips curled into a grin, seeing Max with the vibrator in his hand.

“Come here and untie me,” you requested of Max. Max gulped and removed the handcuffs from your wrists. You rubbed the skin where they’d been gripping you and took the vibrator from Max. “Have you ever used one of these before?”

“Huh?” Max asked, furrowing his eyebrows together. He’d initially planned on using it with you. Holding it against your clit while Dave fucked you.

You giggled and held the vibrator to the tip of Max’s cock. The vibrations ran through his body and his eyes snapped shut as the pleasure consumed him. How come he’d never thought of trying this before? It felt so good.

Dave resumed fucking you and now, with your free hands, it meant you could stroke Maxwell’s cock. The combination of the vibrator and your hand was enough to send Maxwell over the edge.

He came, all over your face, his milky white seed spurting out. His load was impressively big and you opened your mouth wide for him, hoping to at least taste some of it.

After that, it was like a chain reaction. Once Max had finished, the feeling of his warm cum dripping down your skin sent you into a frenzy and you came around Dave, your walls clenching around his manhood. The feeling of you gripping him tighter than a vice meant that on Dave’s final thrust, he spilled inside of you, just like he wanted. The heat of Max’s cum on your face and the warmth of Dave’s cum fill you up felt amazing. You laid there, panting and breathless, wondering how you had ever gotten so lucky.

You tossed the vibrator to one side and extended your arms, pulling Max down on top of you and pressing a sweet kiss to your lips. “Was that okay?” you asked him, and he nodded his head, unable to hide the grin across his lips.

“Never done anything like that before,” Max admitted bashfully. “But I’d like to do it again.”

Helping Maxwell explore his sexuality like this could be really fun, you thought. You cupped your hands around his cheeks and he nudged his nose against yours. The intimacy between you both was outstanding and you loved every second of it.

“Good,” you smiled. “By the way, that’s Dave. He’s uhm.. I watch his kids.” 

Maxwell looked back over at Dave who was tidying up the little black toybox. “Hi.” Dave mumbled awkwardly.

You shot your employer a glare. “Really Dave? You just fucked the shit out of me in front of Max, and now you’re gonna be all weird with him?”

Maxwell reluctantly pulled away from you, stifling a laugh before putting his clothes back on. 

“You can uh, stay the night. If you like,” Dave offered. “It’s late and I’m sure you don’t wanna wake your kid up.”

Maxwell scratched the back of his head as he contemplated Dave’s comment. He made a good point. “I can take the couch?” Max asked. “I really don’t want to intrude.”

“Don’t be silly,” you smiled, interlocking your fingers with his and pulling him back over to your bed. “You can sleep with me… if you’d like.” 

And boy did Maxwell like the sound of that. “Do you uh-- do you sleep with her? I mean. Besides her?” Max asked Dave.

“He never sleeps next to me,” you replied for him. “Prefers to sleep alone like the cold man he is.”

“Whatever,” Dave sighed. “I’m going to bed. Night.” 

You rolled your eyes and blew Dave a kiss goodnight before turning back to Maxwell and pulling him back down onto the bed. You worked at the buttons of his shirt and pulled the expensive material off his broad shoulders.

“Is he… married?” Maxwell asked you nervously.

“Why? You interested?” you asked, a joking lilt to your voice, but Max just scowled. “No,” you told him. “His wife uh-- went missing a while ago. Before I worked here. She was presumed dead. Sometimes I think Dave killed her.” you scoffed incredulously and Maxwell’s jaw stood agape.

“Are you serious?” he asked and you laughed.

“No, I don’t think so,” you said, swatting his arm playfully. “Dave can be cold, and rough. But behind that mean face he’s actually a good guy. A good father.”

Maxwell nodded knowingly. “Well that’s good then.” he mumbled. It was so easy to compare himself to other dads out there, knowing he’d never be good enough for Alistair.

“Are you okay?” you asked Max, smoothing out his dark blonde hair and kissing his jaw softly.

“Yeah, of course,” Maxwell reassured you, suddenly flashing one of his famous, charming television grins. He picked the bullet vibrator up and twiddled it between his fingers. “What do you think about going for a round two?” he smirked. “Just us. And maybe this time I can use this on you?”

You smiled, roaming your hands along his soft chest. “I like that idea.” you whispered wantonly before attaching your lips to his and pulling him on top of you.

You liked Dave. He knew his way around your body, he knew how to make you feel good and safe. But Maxwell came with feelings. He was attentive and affectionate, things you’d never had in a sexual relationship before. You were excited to see where things went between you two.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Permanent taglist: @paintballkid711​​ @supernaturalgirl​​ @phoenixhalliwell​​ @ah-callie​​ ​ @stardust-galaxies​​ ​ @wickedfrsgrl​​ ​@goth-topic ​​ ​ @nerdypinupcrystal​​ ​ @wonderfulfluffer​​ ​ @kiwi-the-first​​ ​ @pedroepascal​​ ​ @castiel-barnes​​ ​ @honeymandos​​ ​ @rocketqueen​​ @ladycumberbatchofcamelot​​ ​ @dybalalover10​​ ​ @girl-obsessed-with-things​​ ​ @elena-myth​​ ​ @moth-guillotine​​ ​ @pedro-pascal-love​​ ​ @hayley-the-comet​​ ​ @pinkninja200​​ @maxiarapamaya​​ ​ @autumnleaves1991-blog​​ ​ @artsymaddie​​ ​ @harrys-stan​​ ​ @kennedywxlsh​​ ​ @cripplingmoon​​ ​ @cheekygeek05​​ ​ @mrschiltoncat​​ ​ @rye-flower​​ ​ @theamuz​​ @persie33​​ ​ @sleepylunarwolf​​ ​ @martellthemandalor​​ ​ @pedro-pastel​​ ​ @steeevienicks​​ ​ @rrtxcmt​​ ​@saphic-susperia ​@ladyjenny19 @readsalot73

Taglist for this one shot in replies.

[kuroopaisen]

little changes | i (miya atsumu)

➵ miya atsumu is the bane of your existence. but, that means different things at different times of your life. 

PART TWO

wc: 6.9k (i know)

warnings: f!reader, cursing (too much tbh)

a/n: hi i couldn’t get this out of head so here you go,,, there’ll be a second part tomorrow 

The first time you'd met, he'd pushed you into a puddle.

"Slow down!" You yelled, chest heaving as you tried to catch up to the two boys ahead of you. Even at seven years old, their legs were significantly longer than yours.

The twins scrambled to a stop, looking over their shoulders at you.

"Hurry up!" Atsumu yapped. "If you can't keep up, we're gonna leave you behind."

"That's unfair!" You pouted, stumbling to a stop in front of them. "You can't just leave me out!"

Atsumu stared at you for a moment.

One clean shove, and you were on your butt, muck and water splashing up around you.

"What'd you do that for?" You yapped, looking up at the boy with a glare strong enough to kill a god.

"You were bein' annoyin'."

"Hey!"

"That's not cool, 'Tsumu," Osamu sighed, holding out a hand to you.

Atsumu shrugged, letting out a long, exaggerated yawn.

That was the day you decided that Miya Atsumu was your arch-nemesis.

Not much had changed since that day. Miya Atsumu was, to put it lightly, the bane of your existence.

Middle school brought him no maturity. If anything, he got worse. He treated you like a nuisance, your friendship with Osamu be damned. But unfortunately, the two of them were rarely apart. And apparently being around you was better than being bored.

"You can't spike a ball for shit," he mumbled, shaking his head at you.

"Oi, language!"

"Shuddup," he rolled his eyes, turning his back to you. "You're so borin'."

He always called you that. Boring.

You glared at him, clenching your fists. You were just trying to play along with them. Sure, your volleyball skills left something to be desired. But Osamu didn't mind. And you wanted to play with your friend, his shitstain of a brother be damned.

"Yeah, well–" You sucked in your breath, trying to think of something very cruel – but not profane, because you're only eleven and swearing is one of the worst things you could do – to say to him. "You're a bastard!"

He looked over his shoulder at you, one eyebrow raised. Did his silence spell your victory?

"Pig."

Nope.  

That was just the first of many monikers Miya Atsumu gave to you. He had so many, in fact, that it seemed he was allergic to calling you by your name. Pig seemed to be a particular favourite.

But, you always prided yourself on being tough. It took more than a few paltry words to do some real damage to you. And you were determined to not let Atsumu get the upper hand.

And yet, some days he did. They were rare, but they stung like nothing else. It was the days he got possessive. The days he told you to piss off, that he wanted to hang out with Osamu and he didn't want you there to ruin it.

You told yourself that it didn't matter. That you couldn't care less what he thought of you. But it wasn't enough to shift that awful little feeling that came with being told you were unwanted.

"Don't listen to him," Osamu sighed, hand clumsily patting your back. "He's just… like that. He sucks."

You sniffed, wiping your nose with the back of your hand. "Yeah."

You were just mad at yourself for crying. Thankfully, Atsumu had stalked off before you'd crumpled. But still. You'd let him get to you. You were better than that, right? Better than him.

"I still like you," Osamu swallowed, fumbling with the right words to say in a situation like this. "I'll beat him up for you, if you want."

You shook your head, a little too vigorously. "Nah, I don't want you to get into a fight with your brother because of me."

That's what it came down to, really. The feeling that you were in the way of something important. Of something that mattered more than you. The spiteful look Atsumu would shoot you whenever Osamu spent time with you instead of him hurt most.

Osamu shook his head. "Nah, it's fine. I really want an excuse to deck him in the face sometimes."

You giggled at that. It was the first time you'd smiled all day. "Thanks, 'Samu."

--------

With each year that passed, Miya Atsumu seemed to get worse. And with each year that passed, you were baffled.

How could someone have such a garbage personality? And worse yet, why was he blessed with such immense talent? You weren't an idiot, and you weren't the sort to deny credit when it was due. The twins were good. You knew jack-shit about volleyball – you'd sworn off it ever since Atsumu had been such a bastard about it – but you knew enough to know they were impressive.

They were just first years, but they were already on the starting line-up of the volleyball team. And you were quite proud of Osamu for that. It was nice to see other people recognising his talents. He'd been humble enough about it, too. Atsumu was another matter, but you'd developed something of a talent for tuning him out. So long as he wasn't insulting you directly, you could ignore him quite well. Life was much better for it.

The only bad thing about Osamu joining the volleyball team was the fact that he now hung out with them. Which wasn't a problem, per say; you were welcome to join, and they were all cordial enough. No, the issue was that sometimes spoke about girls. And nothing was more infuriating than hearing teenage boys advise one another on how to impress girls.

"You're saying I should just… ignore her?" One of the second years frowned at one of the older boys.

"Yeah," the third year nodded. "If you ignore her, she'll get all anxious about it, and she'll keep thinkin' about you."

"Huh," the second year nodded, blinking slowly. "Isn't that kind of… I dunno… mean?"

"Very," you mumbled.

"Huh?"

"If you do that, you'll seem like an asshole. Girls don't like guys like that," you sighed, head rested on Osamu's knee as you looked up at the sky.

Hanging out with the volleyball team wasn't high on your list of favourite activities. But, you had nothing better to do.

"I thought girls liked 'bad boys'," one of the third years laughed.

"I don't wanna make any generalisations," you shrugged. "But it's better if you're friends first. So you've gotta be nice to her."

You had absolutely no experience to speak of. But it seemed like the right thing to say.

"You're only saying that because you've got a thing for Osamu."

You hadn't planned on a murder today. But Suna had just changed your plans.

"Do not," you mumbled, shutting your eyes. Don't bite back, you thought to yourself. If you bite back, they'll just tease you more.

You'd actually thought about it, once. You were sixteen, after all, and ready to yearn. But, as hard as you'd tried to convince yourself that you felt something more for Osamu had fallen flat. The thought of kissing him made you laugh, when it should've made you blush. You hadn't mentioned that to him, though. Having a girl laugh at the thought of intimacy with you was probably at least a little humiliating, regardless of who she was.

"You're lying on him as we speak," one of the team snickered.

"Because I'm tired." You opened one eye to take a glance at the team. You took a moment to visualise punching them all in the face, one by one. It was almost rhapsodic. "You all suck."

"You're not even good enough for 'Samu, anyway."

Oh. Oh.

You bolted upright, glare immediately honing in on him. "Excuse me?"

Atsumu raised an eyebrow at you. "So you think you're good enough for him?"

You opened your mouth to reply. Fuck, you didn't have anything snappy to say. Was strangling him out of the question? Oh God, you could feel your face growing redder by the second. You needed to do something–

"Oi, don't use me as an excuse to make fun of her," Osamu sighed. "You don't really think that highly of me."

"That's cold, 'Samu," Atsumu grimaced. "You really think I'd be okay with you datin' this cow?"

"What did you just call me?"

"Do you like it more when I call you a pig?"

"What on earth gave you that idea, you bastard?" 

Osamu rolled his eyes as the tirade began. Not a day went by without something like this happening. Atsumu said something contrarian, and you exploded like a little firecracker. You weren't the sort to start fights, usually. But there was something about Atsumu that always managed to get under your skin.

He'd hoped that finally entering high school would've taught Atsumu how to behave. He should've known to be wiser than to indulge himself in some wishful thinking.

"Does he always provoke her?" Aran asked, frowning.

Osamu nodded. "Uh huh. He gets a kick out of it."

"Hmm," Aran nodded, "knowing everything I do about Atsumu, that makes perfect sense."

"I keep tellin' her not to respond. It just eggs him on."

"Well, I guess it's kinda hard not to," Aran shrugged.

Osamu sighed. "Y'know, sometimes I just wish they'd get along."

Aran laughed, shaking his head. "Sorry man, can't see that happening any time soon."

--------

Being a teenager fucking sucked.

Getting dumped by an admittedly shitty boyfriend might've been some kind of rite of passage, but that didn't make it hurt any less. You'd tried to count your blessings, small as they may be. At least he hadn't dumped you over text, right?

Maybe it would've been better if he had dumped you over text. That would've given you a few hours at least to pull yourself together. Instead, he'd pulled you aside just before class had started, telling you that he was done with you. He hadn't even given you the chance to speak.

And then you'd had to walk into class and pretend everything was okay. A whole school day was far too long to try and pretend you had it together.

Behind the gym was the only place you'd managed to find the silence in which to mourn. You would've gone and cried in the bathroom if you could, but there was always someone in there. You didn't want to make a scene. And surely, nobody would come behind the gym.

"Oi."

Oh, fuck.

"What do you want?" You mumbled, lacking the courage to look at him.

"I was just tryin' to clear my head before practice," he said. "What're you doin' out here?”

"None of your business," you sniffed, your shoulders hunched and your fists scrunching the fabric of your skirt.

He sat down.

No. No, no, no.

"So," he cleared his throat, not quite looking at you. "I heard about… your ex."

"Great," you sniffed, rubbing your nose with the back of your hand. It'd already reached Atsumu? How much did he know?

"Are you… alright?" His voice was quiet, unsure.

"What do you think?" You hissed, drawing your knees up to your chest.

"Sorry," he mumbled, rubbing the back of his neck. "I just, uh… you've seemed kinda off today."

You shot him a look.

"Yeah, yeah, I know, I just…" He sighed, hanging his head.

You pressed your lips together, trying to sift through the jumble of thoughts in your mind. It wasn't that you'd expected your relationship with that asshole to last. Far from it. You just hadn't expected it to go… like this. Not after he'd taken so much from you.

"It's just that–" The words escaped from you with a hitched breath. "It's just that… I gave him a lot, you know?" You took a deep breath. You weren't about to admit everything to fucking Atsumu of all people. But you just wanted to talk. To put the pain into words. "And he didn't have the decency to… to treat me with respect. He… He…"

"Did he hurt you?" Atsumu's tone was sharp; sharper than you'd ever heard it. He still wasn't looking directly at you. If anything, that was a small comfort.

"Not physically or anything," you shook your head, relaxing your fists. "It's just that he… he treated me like shit. And… and I liked him more than I should've, I know that, but…"

You made a valiant effort at swallowing the lump in your throat. "It just fucking sucks, you know?"

You don't know why you're telling him all this. You'd already said more than you'd wanted to. But damn, did it feel good to get it off your chest.

Did you seem a bit pathetic? Fuck it. Atsumu already thought poorly of you. Letting him see you like this wouldn't be a massive hit to your pride.

And, to his credit, he's listening. You think.

"I think–" You sniffed, taking a deep breath. This was the worst part of all. "I think he's been hooking up with Eiko. Or, at least, he's been trying to."

"What, really?" Oh, he'd looked pissed. You'd never seen this amount vitriol in his face before. Not even when he was arguing with you.

"Yeah." You nodded weakly. You knew it probably wasn't Eiko's fault. And even if she had 'seduced' him, he'd still chosen to dump you over it. You just didn't have the energy to direct your anger at anyone but him.

"Fuckin' piece of shit," he grumbled. You could see him clenching his fists. You'd never thought he'd get this angry on your behalf. "I'm gonna kill him."

"Don't." You nearly reached over to grab his arm. But, you didn't. "Please, I just… I just want this to pass, okay? I don't want to create a mess."

Atsumu stared at you for one long moment. You knew he was weighing up whether or not he should listen to you. Then, he sighed. "Fine."

"Thank you," you mumbled, fiddling with the hem of your shirt. You didn't know what to say, now.

"Well," he cleared his throat, finally meeting your gaze, "if he tries anythin' with you, lemme know, okay?"

You blinked, your own brow just as furrowed as his.

"He's a pig," he grunted, "and… and you deserve better than that, 'kay?"

You stared at him. Had those words really just come from his mouth? "I thought I was the pig."

Atsumu said nothing. He doesn't know what to say. You'd never really interacted like this before. Without the barbs.

He wanted to say that, even though he makes fun of you all the time, you matter. Frankly, he doesn't really know what he'd do if you weren't there for him to pick on. He's used to you being around, you know? That bred at least a little fondness. And the thought that someone had genuinely, actually hurt you pissed him off.

But he doesn't say any of that. Because he doesn't know how to. Hell, he doesn't even know what that means.

"I, uh," he cleared his throat, standing to his feet. "I've gotta get back to practice."

He wants to tell you to text him if you need anything. But, he doesn't think that'll be very comforting, coming from him. So, he walked away.

"Hey, uh, Miya?"

He stopped in his tracks, just as surprised as you were. You never called him by his name.

"Could you, uh… could you keep this between us?" You asked, your throat alarmingly dry. "I'd rather 'Samu didn't know about this. I'm worried that… that he might do something stupid."

Atsumu looked over his shoulder at you. It's a small moment, a quiet one.

He just shrugs. "'Kay."

The next time you're watching them play, you're not just cheering for Osamu.

--------

It's over. Finally.

And you couldn't be more relieved.

Of course, you were going to miss your friends. And of course, all the changes that were about to come your way were fucking terrifying.

But high school sucked. And being a teenager sucked. You couldn't wait to move on from all of that. To make a real person of yourself. And you were going to Tokyo. Tokyo. You'd always lived in Hyogo; the thought of living somewhere so vastly different was downright exhilarating.

But before all that, you had to survive your goodbyes. You'd made it through the graduation ceremony well enough; in truth, you'd zoned out a little.

But now you were all outside, and it was finally time to say goodbye for good. And quite frankly, you hadn't expected to be so emotional. Honestly, you were just proud of yourself for keeping it together. Nobody else was crying – yet – and you'd be damned if you were the first person to lose composure.

You'd managed to say goodbye to most of your friends with a smile, and you'd even bid farewell to your beloved literature teacher without getting too miserable. Surely, there wouldn't be too many people left to see.

A flash of grey and yellow at your right.

Oh no. You had to speak to Osamu. That'd do it.

"Oi!" You called out, hurdling towards him.

Osamu turned around, raising a hand at you. Atsumu glanced in your direction, but he made no effort to greet you. Asshole.

"C'mere," Osamu smiled, opening his arms up.

You threw yourself into them, wrapping your arms around his neck as you supported yourself on your tip-toes. He smiled, chuckling in your ear. Good God, you were going to miss him.

"We did it," you smiled, squeezing him tight.

"Somehow." It was subtle, but you could feel the joy in his voice.

"Good job on getting into TSUJI," you beamed, dropping down as he released you from his grasp.

"Thanks," he smiled, reaching a hand up and ruffling your hair. "University of Tokyo’s nothin' to sniff at, you know."

You blushed, despite yourself. "Yeah, well…"

"Stop bein’ so humble," he said, punching you gently in the shoulder. "Make me proud, you hear?"

"You too."

And that's enough. That's all you need to say. He wasn't big on words, and that was okay. It had always been okay. You knew that you guys would stay friends. Even if everyone else fell away, if you drifted from all these people you held close… you knew you'd have 'Samu.

You heard a voice calling you. You straightened your shoulders, looking up at Osamu resolutely. "I'll see you this weekend, yeah?"

"Sure," he shrugged, nodding at you.

You smiled back, feeling that persistent sting at the corners of your eyes. Your eyes flicked over to Atsumu for just a moment. He'd turned away from you once you'd thrown your arms around Osamu, opting instead to speak to some of the first years. You wondered, for one short moment, if you should try and talk to him.

Nah.

You swallowed, turning around to walk towards whoever had called your name. If you spent any more time standing still, you might not be able to hold back the tears.

You felt a tug on your sleeve, pulling you downwards.

"Oi."

You'd know that voice anywhere. "You're so rude." You shot him a glare, straightening yourself out.

Things had mellowed out a little since that day behind the gym. You wouldn't go so far as to say you were friends; he was still abrasive, and you were still struck by the urge to punch him in the face whenever he came into your field of vision.

But his words had been a little gentler. Insults abounded, but he seemed a bit more mindful. Like he was checking your mood before pushing your buttons.

Or maybe you were just imagining it. Maybe you just wanted that weird little moment between the two of you to mean something.

"What do you want, Miya?" You sighed, after a long silence.

He'd just been standing there, completely silent. He hadn't even bit back. His lips were pursed as he stared at nothing in particular. What an earth is he thinking about? You wondered.

Then, finally, he looked at you. "Wanna live together?"

You froze. Why was he so… like this? "Excuse me?"

He shrugged, hands in his pockets and an obnoxiously bored look on his face. "That's easier than findin' a roommate, right? We already know each other, and we'll both be in Tokyo."

No congratulations. No words of kindness. Nothing. Just straight to business. You weren't sure if that or the offer he'd just made was more baffling.

You bit your lip. Could there be anything worse than living with this fool? Maybe you could end up with a shitty roommate – but he'd also be a shitty roommate. How much worse could a total stranger be?

"Hey. Dickhead."

You jumped, looking up to meet his eyes. "Oh, uh… Let me think about it."

"'Kay."

And then, he was gone.

'Kay? 'Kay? That's all he'd had to say to you? After asking you to live with him? How'd he even come up with that idea? Had Osamu told him to do it? Oh, maybe it was his parents. They were quite fond of you, after all. Perhaps they thought you could keep their son in line or something.

But that wasn't your responsibility! You didn't want it to be your responsibility!  

You shook your head. No, you weren't going to let this dominate your thoughts. You would worry about Atsumu later. For now, you just had to focus on getting through the rest of today.

--------

Your reasons for living with Miya Atsumu were simple.

One: you'd avoid each other. Surely, even if you were in the same apartment, you'd give each other a wide enough berth to ensure some sense of privacy.

Two: you could live like an absolute pig and it wouldn't matter. Who cared if you didn't do your dishes that evening? It only affected him. And fuck him.

Three: you'd heard one too many horror stories about friendships being torn to pieces because of shit like this. You didn't want to risk that.

Four: you didn't want to live with a stranger.

Simple as that.

And those were the four reasons you'd told Osamu, in a paltry attempt to justify yourself. He'd been sceptical, of course – and he'd said, without an ounce of goodwill, "you don't know just how bad he is to live with" – but he hadn't tried to stop you.

But one semester was already over and done with. And things were fine.

Honestly, you were still surprised that he'd even asked this of you. But, his reasons were his own, and frankly, you didn't care what they were.

Yes, he lived like a pig. And God, you'd heard him in bed one too many times because apparently he doesn't know how to be quiet.

"It's not my fault you're not gettin' any," he'd say. You always wanted to bite back and say that you were getting more than enough, thank you very much. You were just polite enough to be quiet. But, you always decided – quite wisely – that it wasn't an argument worth getting into.

But, there's something about the freedom of simply not caring if your roommate would get mad at you for some stupid mistake that made it all worth it. You were allowed to fuck up, to make all those silly mistakes every did in that transitory stage from high school to adulthood. Nothing you could do would ruin an important friendship.

You got to learn how to be a decent person without the consequences.

"Would ya mind if I had some friends over?"

Believe it or not, but this was a big step for him. A few weeks ago, and he would've just brought them over, your feelings be damned.

"When?"

"Thursday evenin'."

"What for?"

"Just catchin' up," he shrugged.

"Is this you asking me if I'm okay with it, or is it you asking me to get out of the house?" You raised an eyebrow at him, stirring your tea.

He flashed you a grin.

You rolled your eyes. "Really?"

"Come on," he propped his chin up on his fist, beaming at you from across the kitchen counter. "Surely, you don't wanna be around when there's a buncha guys in the apartment. Do you?"

"So you're going to bring them over regardless of what I say?"

Nevermind. This wasn't a step for him at all.

"Essentially," he shrugged.

You groaned, lolling your head back.

"Can't you just go to the library or somethin'?" He pouted.

"I don't have any assignments to work on," you frowned. "It's literally only week two."

"Aren't you always tellin' me it's better to get ahead early?" He raised an eyebrow at him.

You narrowed your eyes at him, biting the inside of your cheek. "Week two's overkill."

"Well, just… do your weekly readings or somethin'."

"I'd rather do them from the comfort of my own bed."

Atsumu groaned, running a hand through his hair. "Look, I already told 'em they could come over."

Oh, you were so ready to throttle him.

"Can't you just… make yourself busy?" He shrugged. "I don't want you to be uncomfortable or anythin'."

"You should've thought about that before inviting them over," you growled. "Shit, what are you planning on getting up to, anyway?"

He shrugged. "It'll just stress you out."

"Miya, what the fuck–"

"One of the guys thinks you're hot."

You blinked. He really knew how to be blunt, didn't he?

"And?"

"I can't promise he won't try'n hit on you."

"Yeah, and?"

Atsumu shrugged. "I dunno. I just… thought you might be a bit uncomfortable with that."

"How does he even know what I look like?"

"I showed 'em a photo."

Oh God. Of course he did.

"Why on earth would you do that?"

"I mentioned that my roommate's a chick. They wanted to see."

"Miya," you sighed, gripping your own hair. "What – and I cannot stress this enough – the fuck?"

"It didn't seem like a big deal at the time," he tilted his head at you, smiling. "I mean, I'm just as surprised at you that someone finds you attractive–"

"Shut up."

"– but I just thought you should know. Clear things up before they get too awkward, you know?"

No, you didn't.

But, you didn't really want to have this conversation anymore.

"Fine," you sighed, turning to pour the rest of your tea down the sink. For some reason, you didn't really want it anymore. "I'll find something to do."

Shouldn't be too hard. Maybe a bar or a pub would have a student's night. Maybe one of your friends would be free. There was always something to do in the city. 

"I owe you one," Atsumu grinned. You had half a mind to knock his teeth out then and there.

"You really do," you sighed, rinsing your cup out.

"Already got something in mind."

"Sounds like there's a catch," you mumbled, looking over your shoulder at him.

"No catch," he held his hands up, giving you what you assumed was his best smile.

"Has anyone ever told you you've got an untrustworthy face, Miya?"

"All the time," he grinned. "Nah, but really. No catch."

You titled your head at him, waiting for a proposal of some kind.

"I'll buy you pizza."

You scoffed. "Really? That's your consolation?"

"I'll get you the expensive shit," he shrugged. "Friday night. Promise."

"Can you even afford anything that's not from the cheapskate menu?"

"Can you?"

You shrugged at that one.

"Nah, I promise, it'll be good," he sighed. "I'll make it worth it, 'kay?"

--------

Friday nights were for Atsumu.

You weren't quite sure how it started. Something to do with him being exhausted from volleyball practice. Something to do with you being exhausted from university. Something else about how neither of you had any energy left to go out and socialise.

Whatever it was, you'd settled into a comfortable rhythm. Friday night, pizza, and a shitty movie.

These days, you actually liked having him around. Not that you were going to admit to it, though. No, you'd rather die than do anything like that.

You weren't quite sure why you'd suddenly adjusted to him. Was it because you'd known him for so long? Even if he was an absolute nuisance, he was familiar. Someone you could be a goblin around, without having to worry about him wanting to end your friendship over it. No, you'd been involved with each other far too long for that.

And honestly, it was kind of nice to have someone to relax around. While you'd managed to find some people you clicked with at university… making friends was hard. There was no-one you could be an absolute pig with yet.

So, Atsumu would do for now.

You'd just finished watching Neil Breen's Fateful Findings. It had been surprisingly easy to find a copy with Japanese subtitles; that being said, you didn't feel it had given you any clarity as to what was actually going on. Atsumu had loved it, though. He'd already tried throwing some of the quotes back at you. That was sure to make him harder to live with for at least the next week or two.

"Wanna play Smash?" He was sprawled out on the couch, looking at you with a painfully cocky expression.

"Absolutely not."

"Worried I'll beat your ass again?" Did he have to smirk after every second thing he said?

You glared at him. "Wanna say that to my face?"

He grinned, turning to face you head on. "Worried I'll beat your ass again?"

"I was having an off day," you mumbled.

"Wanna prove that, or…"

You bit the inside of your cheek. If you did play, there were two possible outcomes. The first was that you won. If you won, it'd shut him up, and you could go on with your pride more or less intact. The second was that you lost. And you weren't quite sure if you could handle his ego.

"I'll prove it to you right now," you snapped. "On this couch, with my fists."

He blinked at you.

"You're going down for good, Miya."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah," you nodded. "I'm gonna make you squirm like the worm you are."

He laughed. A real, genuine laugh. The sort that relieved all tension from his body, erasing any hint of his usual insufferable expression.

He was actually kind of handsome.

You'd always known he had a nice body – you weren't blind, you were just too proud to admit it. And it'd gotten even nicer since graduation. Practice paid off, it seemed.

And there was something appealing about his relaxed air. About how he didn't seem to take life too seriously. It almost made him enjoyable to be around.  

Maybe that's why so many girls were interested in him.

Wait, no. They only liked him because they hadn't spoken to him yet.

Oh, right. Girls.

Something shifted in your chest. Something you had never noticed before. Something so quiet, so understated that you hadn't even realised it had made its way in there.

Oh God, you thought, what the fuck is happening to me?

Whatever it was, you didn't like it.

Miya Atsumu was hot. That, unfortunately, was a fact you were now uncomfortably aware of.

"Oi." A hand was being waved in front of your face. You jumped. "Pay attention, you pig."

Oh, nope. There he was. There's the Atsumu you were used to.

"You're a fucking bastard," you mumbled, shrinking into yourself.

You're weren't quite sure what you were saying. You'd just flicked onto autopilot. But you knew that your words were comfortable, familiar. Little insults that a child would throw around. Anything to stave off whatever that weird stirring in your stomach was.

--------

In many ways, realising Miya Atsumu was actually kind of hot ruined your life.

Were you being over-dramatic? Probably. But had things changed? Definitely. To a large extent, it was on you; glances stolen when he wasn't looking, your mind wandering to places it really shouldn't.

But he'd been acting up, too. Standing far too close to you when you were in the kitchen – close enough that you could feel his chest against your back, reaching over your head to grab a cup while damn-near draping his body over you, walking around without a shirt on in the common area…

One time, when you'd dressed up all nice for a friend's birthday, he'd brazenly checked you out. He hadn't said anything – he'd just stared. When you asked him what was wrong, he just shrugged and told you to have fun. And, of course, he'd smirked at you. You'd been ready and willing to kill him.  

Whenever you were on the couch, he always seemed to reach over you and take the remote himself instead of simply asking you to hand it to him. And sure, that wasn't all too weird – but he tended to get really close, and catch your eye for just a moment with that little smirk on his lips. Each and every time, you felt like you were going to explode.

You'd taken to sticking pillows between you on the couch, because you wouldn't be surprised if he decided to lay his head on your lap or some shit on a whim.

Maybe he was messing with you, but this sort of behaviour wasn't totally un-Atsumu. You'd seen him act like this with people before. It's just that you two had never really been close enough to warrant it. Was it just a symptom of the fact that you guys were kind of friends now? Was he just treating you like everyone else?

But some part of you was even angrier at that. You didn't want to be treated like everyone else.

God, you felt stupid for even feeling like that. Especially when you'd had an awkward morning chat with a few of his bedfellows – where each and every time, you couldn't help but marvel at the fact that he was punching so far above his weight. How on earth were people this beautiful paying attention to him?

That was starting to make more and more sense recently.

You tried not to think about it.

But that was getting harder and harder to you. You'd been kind of lonely. Some quiet part of you wanted a serious relationship; someone to come home to of an evening, to relax and unwind with. You'd even been actively looking. Not that you were about to admit that to anyone.

But men are shit. Especially ones in their early twenties.

But as resolutely as you believed that, there you were, preparing for yet another date. You'd have a particularly messy string of disasters recently; men who did little more than stare at your tits, men who had nothing interesting to say, men who thought that being an asshole was a personality…

Tonight, you hoped, would be different. Sure, you'd met this guy in an econ elective – you'd needed something easy to bring your GPA up – and that certainly wasn't a point in his favour. But, he'd taken in interest in you, despite the fact you'd never really spoken before. A few months ago, you might've turned him down. But surely he'd be better than the drivel Tinder unfailingly turned out.

Only problem was that he wanted to go somewhere chic. Somewhere fancy. Somewhere that was, quite frankly, out of your comfort zone.

"Another date?" Atsumu scoffed, leaning on the doorframe to the bathroom.

"What's it to you?" You grumbled, leant in close to the bathroom mirror. You couldn't get your makeup to look how you wanted it to; everything just seemed a little wonky, a little uneven. And your foundation hadn't settled nicely into your face. It just sat there, a tacky second skin you just wanted to slough off.

"Nothin'," Atsumu shrugged. "You've just never gone out on a Friday before."

Oh. That's right.

You shrugged, biting your cheek. "It's the only day he could get a reservation." In truth, you hadn't even thought about it.

"Same guy as before?"

You shook your head. You couldn't actually remember the last guy you'd told Atsumu about. The amount of bad dates you'd been on was getting embarrassing. "Nah. This one's a classy bastard."

He snorted. "You're kiddin', right?"

You shook your head. "I'm going to have to let him pay for the date because I genuinely don't think I can afford it."

"Yikes," he chuckled. "You know, I never really took you for a gold digger."

You had half a mind to throw your mascara at him. "Shut up."

"If you keep faffin', you'll be late."

Shit, He was right. You checked your phone. 5:25. You had five minutes to leave. You picked it up and made your way to the door, ready to squeeze past Atsumu. You turned, dashing back to the mirror and poking at your hair.

"Stop worryin'," he chuckled, waving a hand at you as he began to walk away. "You look nice."

Those words stuck with you all the way to the restaurant. They were so simple, so innocuous, but… They were touching, coming from him.

And when your date was talking to you about something you simply didn't find interesting, you couldn't get that look on Atsumu's face out of your head.

--------

The date was a veritable disaster. Possibly the worst you'd had in a while.

First of all, the guy was a total asshole. And not just the Atsumu kind – no, this one was rich. He'd had his entire life handed to him on a silver platter, and it showed. You could tolerate it, at first. But when he'd literally said, "I don't think the poor should be allowed to vote," you knew you couldn't stick around.

Second of all, you couldn't stop thinking of Atsumu and his damn smirk.

You'd gotten up without even giving your date an explanation. You'd stormed out of the restaurant in a rage, resolute on walking all the way home.

Why did it always turn out this way? The guys were either assholes, or far too self-centred for a proper relationship. If they were neither of those things, there was just no chemistry between the two of you.

God, were you the problem? Were good people just not attracted to you?

What were you supposed to do?

To top it all off, it began to rain when you were just halfway home.

As you slammed the door, you looked as awful as you felt.

Atsumu flinched, sprawled out in front of the television. He sat up a little straighter, looking at you from over the back of the couch.

"Yikes!" He scoffed. "You look like shit!"

Your breath caught in your throat. No. No, you weren't going to take this from him right now. Not tonight.

"Y'know, you wouldn't've gotten rained off if you'd just stayed in," he chuckled, propelling himself off the couch and ambling his way over to you. "What a waste…"

He came to a stop in front of you, hands stuffed in the pockets of his sweatpants. He had that look on his face; that insufferable smirk he whipped out whenever he'd beaten you in something menial. That smirk that, in any other circumstance, would've made you want to punch him. But tonight, it just made you want to cry.

"You haven't said anythin'," he frowned, tilting his head at you. "You okay?"

You wanted to lie. You wanted to tell him that it was fine, that the mascara dappling your cheeks was just the result of the rain.

But you couldn't. You couldn't get the words out of your mouth.

You took a deep breath.

You stopped breathing. His arms were around you, pulling you into his chest. It was rough, the embrace of someone who wasn't used to tenderness. There's this strange stiffness to it, an admission that he doesn't really know what he's doing. But as he rests his head on your chin, you couldn't be more grateful for his efforts. Your hands found their way to his chest, balled up and tense.

"Hey," he mumbled, "hey. It's going to be okay."

You looked up at him, your throat sore from holding back a sob and eyes stinging from unshed tears.

Maybe it's because you're emotional. Or because you're tired. Or maybe it's because you're lonely, and he said a few nice things to you today.

You kissed him.

It's hot, open-mouthed as your fists grasped his shirt, pulling him down to meet you.

Your head is swimming; what the fuck is happening?

 His arms tensed around you, his lips moving to meet yours.

This is what you want. This is what you've wanted for a while now. You hadn't wanted to go on all those shitty dates. You hadn't wanted to waste your time with men you didn't care about. What you'd wanted was–

He froze.

So did you.

His hands are holding your forearms firmly as he stepped back, an inscrutable expression on his face.

"No, baby." He shook his head. "Not like this."

Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

You flew down the hall, slamming your bedroom door.

You sank to the floor, arms finding their way around your knees. You didn't want to cry. You didn't want to dignify this evening with that. You weren't going to pity your own shitty mistakes.

Fuck the date. That wasn't even the worst part of the night.

You'd just kissed Miya fucking Atsumu. Things were finally going okay between the two of you. He'd been treating you like a human being.

And now you'd ruined it.

[amonrawya]

The Greatest Gift of All

(Inspired by^ for the people who asked :D hope it was worth the wait!)

*

Long before the war, before Captain America or the Winter Soldier, there was simply Bucky and Steve. At least, that's what history says. But they missed out one very important person, a girl called Y/N.

Women in those times often found themselves with little opportunity, and only two easily attainable pathways in life: wife and mother. But Y/N carved out a life for herself that defied all expectations, and it all started in Brooklyn.

She dived headlong into scuffles, usually next to Bucky in defence of Steve. Regardless of the opponent, Y/N stood by them both, and often held her own quite impressively.

Her dress style borrowed from more masculine cuts, and Y/N was never seen without her cap. A lot of people had a problem with this, but she shut them up fairly swiftly.

Everything about this girl drew Bucky in, a battle he fought with little effort. They reveled in each other, flaunting their love at every opportunity. More than a few were jealous that the rough and tumble girl got the best looking boy in town. 

In a way, before even coming of age, they started an adult life together. The three of them moved into a flat. Y/N and Bucky took hard labour jobs, or anything they could get. They had little room to be picky. 

Both managed to hook steady summer jobs at the local docks. They used most of their money to keep a roof over their heads, buy food, and pay for Steve's medical needs. He attended art school, and sold his work every now and then; but physically, he was in no condition to work.

The war appeared on the horizon, just as they started to pull themselves an inch above the poverty line. Y/N saw it coming, the inevitable. She treasured every second they spent together, and dreaded the day when the draft came.

A lot of the older women she worked with were disrespectful, looking down on her pre-marital relationship with Bucky. They claimed she couldn't possibly understand their grief, despite the fact Y/N had seen Bucky off at the docks that very morning. 

In truth, they already planned on being married, but at the time, they simply didn't have the funds. Bucky promised, once the war ended, that ring would be on her finger.

Except, he never came home. Not properly. The person Hydra gave back to Y/N was damaged and jaded, angry at the world, angrier than she ever saw. But still, they loved each other. Though she never forgave them for stealing away his innocence, for trying to snuff out the light in his soul. A part of him would always belong to them, and she hated it.

Refusing to stay home while they risked their lives, never knowing, Y/N trained as an army nurse, working specially with the Howling Commandos unit.

Then one day, she went out to welcome them back from a mission. Every face looked devastated, but none more so than Steve. His eyes, red-raw and streaming, seemed incapable of rising from the ground. At first, the realisation didn't process, the idea simply incomprehensible. He promised.

Dugan was the one to finally break through and catch Y/N as she fell, holding her as the tears poured. Once he shook off his daze, Steve took his place, sharing in her grief.

Her world fell apart so quickly, with no warning and no mercy. Their commanders celebrated the capture of Arnim Zola, while Y/N and Steve sat, staring at an empty place at their side.

Everyone mourned Bucky, and swiftly after, began to mourn Y/N, too. The loss took a part of her...the sparkle, the happiness, the laugh that lit up her face. It all vanished. She worked hard, looked after them all, but only Steve was able to make her smile. Even then, it looked pained.

So when Steve went down with the plane, the very last shred of Y/N died with him. No tears left her eyes, no screams ripped up her throat. A cold numbness took over, freezing the woman from the inside out. 

V-Day came and went. The Commandos stood and drank to their lost comrades, and Dugan silently drank another...for the loss of a bright, fiery girl who had virtually nothing to lose, and still lost everything.

She spent her days as a robot, doing nothing but going through the motions of badly imitating life. The flat was empty and quiet, yet somehow, bursting with the ghosts of her loved ones. Nightmares plagued her, terrible images of Bucky's body, forever trapped in a freezing hell, nothing but food for the birds. And Steve, his body...was it cast adrift in the ocean? Or destroyed, burnt to ash in the belly of a metal beast. 

They were simple folk before the war turned them into soldiers, into weapons. Before symbols and flags stole away their names, driving them to sacrifice their lives for a greater cause.

Y/N knew their fight against Hydra was important...knew the honour behind their sacrifice. But when it's you left sitting at an empty dinner table, it's much easier to be angry and bitter.

She never married, never settled, bouncing around countries working as an army nurse. The Commandos slowly died around her, each one fading to grey as the curtain drew the show to a close. Each death, each funeral ripped open her wounds, bigger and deeper each time. Until eventually, Y/N let the blood flow freely.

Or at least, that's what would have happened. But one choice, one decision, made by a boy she thought dead in the far future, changed it all.

*

Bucky Barnes struggled to find himself again. His memories were mostly all returned, if a bit hazy and fragmented. He had Steve there to right any wrong recollections, and connect with on their shared experiences. But something always seemed to be missing, a piece of the jigsaw that hadn't been found.

He remembered Y/N. He remembered her clearer than anything. She was glowing like honey in the sun when Bucky closed his eyes and brought her back to mind.

Face covered in muck, hair tousled and streaked with grease from the boats, soot on the very tip of her nose and a cap perched jauntily on her head; wearing the deepest expression of concentration as she aimed a hanful of rotten fish guts at the sleezy Connell boy from Fifth, who decided his opinion on her backside mattered. The image shone crystal clear. Her laughter, rolling out from between curved lips, beautiful and full of mischief. 

It never failed to make him smile. Or cry. Or sometimes, both. He missed Y/N than he thought possible for a human being. 

Bucky often wondered about her life, whether she went on to marry, or maybe even have children. Was she happy? Did she bury him and move on? If they met today, would Y/N even recognise the man he was now? 

More importantly, in his mind, something he both feared and longed to know: would she still love him?

Unbeknownst to Bucky, Steve saw all this. Understood, to a degree, his pain. But he and Peggy never got the chance to bond so strongly. He knew Bucky needed him, but Steve also knew he needed Y/N more.

So once his goodbyes were said, he looked one last time at Bucky, and smiled beneath his suit as he vanished into time.

*

The living room looked exactly the same as he remembered. Bucky's coat, slung over the back of the chair, his sketchbooks strewn around the desk. Every rip and chip. His heart swelled with nostalgia, and pain, thinking of the life they were supposed to have.

What must have been in their heads...running off to fight, so eager to throw everything away. And who was left to stare at empty beds and eat breakfast alone every morning? Y/N.

His chest constricted, hearing the keys in the door, the lock rattling three times before letting her in. His nerve faltered for the briefest second, wondering if he was ready to see her again.

"Who the hell are you?!"

Time's up.

Slowly, he turned, and watched as Y/N's eyes widened, all the bags in her hands falling to the floor with a crash.

"...Stevie?" The name came out as a whisper, nearly inaudible.

He grinned, laughing as tears stung his eyes. "Hey, spitfire. Long time no see."

"Steve!" She launched herself at him, arms wrapping around his neck and clinging on for dear life. 

Catching her by the waist, he swung Y/N around, burying his face in her hair. They held onto one another as if they might vanish if they let go. But after a minute, Steve gently pushed her back.

"How? How are you here? What are you wearing? I don't understand, Steve, they said you died! Your plane went down in the ocean," she stammered, hand on his forearm with a grip like a vice.

"I survived. The serum kept me alive in the ice for seventy years," he said, questioning his own sanity momentarily; standing in the flat again made everything that happened seem like a distant dream.

Y/N frowned, brows knitting together. "What? Did you hit your head? Steve, this is 1945."

"I know, I came from 2023. I'm alive," he said, and saw her mentally backing away, so added, "I'm alive, and so is Bucky."

Her head snapped up, eyes immediately filling with tears. A dozen emotions whizzed through them in a second; disbelief, pain, hope. It shone clearly in her face as she stepped closer.

What did you say?" She asked, voice choked as she brought her shaking hands up to her mouth.

"Bucky's alive," he repeated softly, "and I can send you to him, in the future. But we don't have a lot of time. You need to listen to me, carefully, and do what I say."

She spluttered, struggling for words. "I, but...what about you?"

"I've made my decision," Steve said, and gently took her hands in his, "now, please, listen."

*

Bucky watched the machine, feeling a wave of numbness wash over his insides. Nothing was a better deal than the pain, the cruel sting of betrayal fighting to be felt. But he beat it back, unable to allow those thoughts validation.

Steve gave up so much for him, he fought for years to get him here. Steve deserved this. And no matter how wrong those words sounded in his head, he resolutely stood by them. 

The seconds ticked by, noted by Bruce's countdown. A flash of guilt almost made Bucky explain what was going to happen, explain that Steve left them. Left him. But he possessed no energy to speak, they'd see in a second, when no one appeared-

Zap. A blinding flash of light.

There's someone there.

Bucky frowned, hands falling from his pockets. Did Steve change his mind? Did he...

All the thoughts in his head stopped as the figure stepped down. Too small, too lithe for it to be Steve. Bucky's heart rate quickened, something in his unconscious already registering his recognition. 

The suit fell away, and if he weren't frozen in place, Bucky wouldn't have been standing. A quiver shot through him, nearly buckling his knees. Shock, fear and pure disbelief all delayed his reaction.

Y/N looked around, amazed, but turned to stone as she set eyes on him. Her face went utterly blank, a strangled sound leaving her lips.

Wearing her yard slacks, with a small bag on her shoulder, her face covered in dirt, hair streaked with grease, cap perched on-top, slanted to one side...she was everything he remembered, and his heart tried to leave his chest to go to her. To be whole again.

But fear held him back. She didn't know the things he'd done, the person he became after the train accident. What if-

"Who is she?" Sam asked, glaring as he stalked towards her, an accusation rising on his lips.

Bucky answered without hesitation, or thinking; the question had been asked countless times over the years. It always recieved the same reply. "My doll."

Sam stopped short, glancing between them, the way neither took their eyes off the other. He nodded, brows still closely knit, and backed off.

Slowly, Y/N approached, encouraged by the sound of his voice. She reached out carefully, when she got close enough. Trembling fingers brushed his cheek, and a shudder ran through her. 

"My Bucky..." She said quietly, eyes roaming over his face, a small smile tugging at her lips, "...you're here, in front of me. Alive."

He swallowed dryly, heart thundering away beneath his skin. "I'm different...you don't know..."

No sooner had the words left his mouth that her eyes found the cold metal where his flesh used to be. In reaching to hold it, she'd been taken by surprise.

Gently, Y/N took the hand in her own, examing the limb with a careful gaze. Moments passed, and she met his eyes again. Bucky steeled himself for rejection, for the disgust and horror.

Her hand went back to his cheek, and he involuntairly leaned into it. The warmth seeped into his blood. She stood on her tip toes, the smile on her lips blossoming into a bright beam of sunlight. "You've always been my Bucky, and always will be. Metal appendages and all."

He fell apart and dove down to capture her lips, clutching her to him with the hunger of a starving man. She pulled herself in, hands tangling in his brown locks, and both tasted salt on the others' lips.

So filled with joy his heart could burst, Bucky revelled in the feeling of holding his girl again. Laughing through the tears, he buried his face in her neck.

Thank you, Steve, for the greatest gift of all.

[chaand-sitara]

τρία

"No m'e,de dio,Hamare-o.No de me yo,Se ya noeh.No mo de yo,Hamare-o,Ovamieh,seyah noeh." A Serene voice sang, under the deep ocean.. Calling for someone.

The voice now stopped and looked at the crown floating in front of, as soon as it was about to touch it...

" Ahhh!" Primadonna woke up from her nightmare and felt all sweat around her and then saw it on the pillows, She yanked the suffocating quilt away from her body and got up, but as soon she she did so she fell down on the ground when she felt her legs were asleep.

"Fuck!" she sat there for awhile in the darkness of her room and let the feeling of thousand of needles pricking her leg, go away.

"Finally" She got up and looked at the mirror 'God I look so sick, who am I kidding I am sick today..'

She picked up her phone and messaged Bonnie about it and told her she was on a leave from school today.

Primadonna closed her phone and opened the blinds of the window,She squinted her eyes because of sunrays almost blinding her.

Primadonna went to the kitchen to make herself a PB&J sandwich with apple juice.

She took the bread and the peanut butter and jam and finished making it in a span of few minutes.

She took out the juice box from the fridge and drank directly by it.

After she had her breakfast she cleaned her room and left the house 'Maybe I should meet Pandora tomorrow' she took her cycle and spent rest of her day alone and watched tv

•◌•◌•★•◌•◌•

"Prim, how nice of you to come honey, how are you?" The sweet old warden asked her as soon as she came in the Mystic falls orphanage, bearing gifts for the children in it the next day.

"Oh nothing, took a leave from school today, not feeling well. How about you?" The Warden shook her head and said "Oh nothing just taking care of the few children in the orphanage, nothing much, here, give me the gifts, I will give them and I believe Dora is in the garden colouring her book."

Primadonna smiled at the warden and went to the garden to see the little pretty child sitting there and filling colours in her book which by the way is not a colouring book

Then she looked at the new colouring book and colour pencil set in her hand and slowly went towards the child, she placed the gifts down and covered her eyes with her hands.

"Guess who?" the Child smiled, immediately recognising the voice and shouted "Prima!"

She got out of her hold and hugged the taller girl "Hey Andi, how are you?" Primadonna asked the young child, whose name was Pandora Caesar, her last surname being same as the rest of the children in orphanage who were named after the first owner of this place, Fillius Caesar.

"Nothing, just having some fun time! What did you brought me?" Pandora asked the highschooler, Primadonna pointed down and the little girl saw the book and the pencils.

"Oh my god! Thank you Prima! I love you so so much!" the child said as she hugged her gifts and Primadonna too. Then Primadonna smiled and said "Well, go and keep them in your roo., we are gonna have so much fun today, okay?"

Pandora nodded and sprinted towards the old victorian Building and towards her dorm who she shared with three other girls. As soon as she entered she saw all three of them scowling at her.

" Tch, why does she always pay so much attention to this malnourished brat? And she isn't even old enough to adopt her!" Pandora knew if she kept her gifts in her drawer they will either take it or destroy it so she kept it in her chest, which came with her when she was a baby and locked it, she took the key with her and left to go to Primadonna.

" Hey you are back! That was quick! Let's go." Primadonna settled Pandora at the front of her bike and sat behind Pandora and they both rode off to have a nice ride.

Primadonna remembers the first time she met the child, she was 15,and Pandora 5,now 17 and Pandora 7,they both were like sisters, When she saw her at the orphanage, The child looked alone, as no one was talking to her which reminded Primadonna of Herself so she went upto her and they bonded instantly.

"Where do you wanna go?" Pandora pondered on the question for awhile and said "How about.. Our place? We can grab some snacks and go there!"

Primadonna nodded and said "Alright! Let's go to the grocery store, we will find some snacks there!" and Then Primadonna sped towards the said store.

-ˏ͛⑅　‧̥̥͙‧̥̥ ̥ ̮ ̥ ⊹ ‧̫‧ ⊹ ̥ ̮ ̥ ‧̥̥‧̥̥͙　⑅ˏ͛-

Primadonna stopped at the store and then got Pandora off and they went inside. They brought Wafers, cold drinks, Candies and chocolates and many more things for the orphanage too.

Soon they reached there special place which was a little far away from Mystic Falls and almost no one knew about it.

They both sat down and ate the snacks they both, talked about they melancholy lives and tried to guess weird shapes in the hypnotic Sky filled with sad clouds of Mystic Falls

They both sat down and ate the snacks they both, talked about they melancholy lives and tried to guess weird shapes in the hypnotic Sky filled with sad clouds of Mystic Falls.

After sometime Primadonna got a call in her phone, she picked it up and saw it was Bonnie. "Is it your friend?" Primadonna thought for awhile and said "You could say that."

She answered the call and they asked "Hey Bonnie, what's up?" Then she heard a commotion in the other line and heard "Nothing much we all are in the Grill and I thought you should come too, haven't see you for awhile."

Primadonna then Looked at Pandora who was listening to the conversation and made a look which said 'You wanna go with me?'

Pandora smiled and nodded her head up and down several times then Primadonna said" Uh ok, I will come, but I am bringing a kid with me."

Then Bonnie said" Oh ok, she can drink milkshake of the grill! Come quickly. "

They both then packed the bag and went towards back Home to drop of the snacks Primadonna brought for herself, as soon as they reached her home they saw a car Pandora then said" Wow!Prima! Is this your car?!" Primadonna looked and saw a beautiful car.

Primadonna looked confused about how would someone drop a car at her house, then she looked at a note and then everything made sense.

Happy Birthday in advance sweetie,

daddy loves you the most

Have fun in your new ride

-your Dad

-ˏ͛⑅　‧̥̥͙‧̥̥ ̥ ̮ ̥ ⊹ ‧̫‧ ⊹ ̥ ̮ ̥ ‧̥̥‧̥̥͙　⑅ˏ͛-

They both reached the Grill and then went inside and Saw all three of the girls in there, both of them went towards those three and Primadonna sat next to Elena and Pandora next to Primadonna.

"Oh my god! Who is this cute kid?" Caroline squealed, Primadonna looked at Pandora and said "Uh,my cousin, I am babysitting her today, after this I will go drop her off to her parents." Primadonna quickly made up, Which brought relief to both fo them as they both didn't wanted the secret to be out.

They nodded and Elena said "She looks like you alot!" Primadonna and Pandora looked at each other and shrugged.

"I was talking to Grams and apparently the comet is a sign of impending doom. The last time it passed over Mystic Falls, there were lots of death. So much blood and carnage that it created a bed of paranormal activity."All of them now looked uncomfortable because of what Bonnie said.

Then to diffuse the tension Caroline said" And then you poured another shot of glass and she told you about Aliens. " and then she turned towards Elena and asked" And then what? "

" Then Nothing" Elena said while Primadonna sat confused "You and Stefan talked all night? No sloppy first kiss? Or touchy feely of any kind?". 'wait, what? Did these two progressed so much?Nice. For them.. I guess'

"Nope, we didn't go there" while she started to smile and blush a little. But Caroline didn't wanted to buy it and raised her eyebrows while asking "Not even a handshake? Come on we all are friends! You're supposed to share the smut!"

"There was no 'smut' care we just talked all night, that's it, and that was sweet too." Elena replied. Primadonna looked at Elena and she could see in her eyes that she liked Stefan alot.

The Caroline rolled her eyes and said "What's with the blockage? Just jump his bones already!" which made Primadonna and Elena covering Pandora's ears "Boy likes girl-Girl likes boy, boom! Sex!"

Which made Elena And Primadonna have a relief that they didn't removed their hands from Pandora's ears. Then they both and Bonnie said "Caroline!" she looked Pandora and winced and said "Sorry!"

Then Elena thought for awhile and said "You're right..It is easy. If I sit here long enough, I'll end up talking myself out of doing what I started the day saying what I was gonna do." Then Primadonna asked "What you gonna do?"

Elena thought for awhile and said "I am gonna talk to him!" then they nodded and went outside to bid Elena bye then they saw Primadonna and Caroline said "Woah! Which hottie's car is this?"

Then Pandora said "It's of Prima!" then all three of them looked at Primadonna and then Caroline said "Woah! You finally got a car! How?" then Primadonna said "Uh.. Early birthday present."

They nodded and Bonnie said "We so need to celebrate your birthday!" Primadonna smiled and said "Yeah.."

Then Caroline said "Wait! Elena! Go in Primadonna's car! It would look so cool!" Then Elena looked at Both of them and asked "Uh will it be fine?"

Primadonna then said "Uh yeah it's ok.hop in!" Then all three of them drove to the Salvatore Boarding House.

‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊ ♡ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ·͙*̩̩͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩̥͙·̩̩̥͙*̩̩̥͙˚̩̥̩̥*̩̩͙‧͙ °̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥ ♡ ‧̍̊·̊‧̥°̩̥˚̩̩̥͙°̩̥‧̥·̊‧̍̊

Elena got off and went towards the house as soon as she got in, Primadonna saw A crow flying in, she ignored it and looked at the backseat to see Pandora sleeping peacefully.

Elena

Elena went in and looked around searching for Stefan, a second later a crow flew in and freaked her out she turned around and saw the door was closed, then she turned back around and was starteled to see a man in front of her.

She looked at him carefully and saw How nice he looks, from his raven hair to his hypnotic Eyes.

"I am so sorry, the door was open so I.." Elena said before she trailed off, The Man looked at her and smirked and Said "You must be Elena."

Then he said again "I am Damon, Stefan's Brother." Elena then thought for awhile and said "But Stefan said he didn't had any brother.?"

Then Damon rolled his eyes and said "Well Stefan isn't the one to brag about it. Please come."

Elena looked around the house and said "Woah, is this your living room?"

Then Damon replied "Living Room, Parlor. It's a little glitchy for my taste" Then Elena suddenly remembered Primadonna and interupted Damon before he could say something and said "Uh, My friend is also here, could you call her if she can come in?"

Then Damon and Elena went outside and saw Primadonna in her car, then Damon said "Nice car, looks pretty expensive." Then Elena said "Well uh, it's actually hers. She dropped me off here can she come in?"

Damon nodded and said "But I don't wanna talk to Miss 'I am alone', you go!" Elena rolled her eyes and waved her hands up high.

Primadonna quickly noticed it and saw a very pretty looking man next to her 'It looks like I am friends with a hottie magnet'

Then when Elena saw She got her attention, she gestured her to come in. Primadonna at first refused but when Elena did it again she obliged and walked towards the house and went in.

As soon as she came in, Elena said "Primadonna meet Damon, Damon meet Primadonna."

Then Damon smirked and said "A handful of name you have here." Primadonna smiled and said "Yeah uh, it's kinda god given I guess?"

He smiled and then turned his attention back to Elena and said "Now I see why Stefan's all smitten about you, it's about time, For a while, I thought he would never get over the last one, nearly destroyed him I tell you."

Then Primadonna looked carefully at Damon and saw he looked like the man fromher nightmare, and those eyes she saw when she saved Vicky.

" Last one? " Elena asked in Confusion. Then Damon added saying"Yeah, Katherine, His girlfriend--Oh wait you both didn't had that awkward ex conversation. Oops.". 'It feels like he is doing it on purpose! Why can't Elena see it?'

"Nope" Then Damon acted like he felt cringed out and said "Well, it will come up now." and also added "Or maybe he didn't wanted to let you know because you might think he is on rebound and we all know how that ends--How those.. Relationships end."

Primadonna glared at Damon and said "You're saying as if every relation is doomed to a sad ending.."

Insted of answering her, he said "Hello Stefan." Both of them turned around and saw Stefan, whom Primadonna noticed was glaring at Damon.

"Elena, Primadonna, I didn't knew you both were coming.." then Elena said "Yeah, I uh should've called, Primadonna just dropped me here."

"Oh don't be silly, you're welcome anytime Elena." 'Does he doesn't see or does chooses not to. Meh I guess he likes her.. He looks little older though'

"Aren't they, Stefan?you know? I should bring out the family photos and the home movies, But I have to warn you, he wasn't always a looker."

Then Primadonna looked at Elena and gave a look which said 'I wanna go back' then Stefan said "It was nice of you both to stop by, bye." then Elena looked at both the boys and said "Yeah we should go, We are getting late. Bye Damon."

Then Damon replied "Bye Elena, visit again and in your car." Primadonna then glared at Damon while he wasn't looking and sprinted from the house.

Then Damon grabbed Elena's hand and kissed it, then Elena looked last time at Stefan who wasn't looking at her and then left.

She sat back in the car and Primadonna went towards the road. "Uh, can I come to your home?" Primadonna at first hesitated but then said "Uh Okay..sure.."

Then they reached her home and Elena's eyes went wide "This! Is your house?! Its even bigger than the Lockwoods! It's almost as the Salvatore house! That's why you weren't surprised seeing the house! Woah!"

Then Primadonna smiled shyly and said "Uh yeah.. Maybe this was the reason."

Then Elena said "Where is your mom?" Then Primadonna looked down and said "Elena.. My mom left me when I was 4...she didn't wanted to raise a child.. Then Dad took care of till 13 and since then I am living alone."

Elena then looked at Primadonna and realised how worse her situation was then Herselves.. Atleast she had aunt Jenna and Jeremy.." Any.. Siblings? " Primadonna then said" Nope.. None.. "

Then Elena smiled at her and said" Well it's a beautiful house.. Now can you please drop me back? It felt nice to be here.. The atmosphere is good here!I will see you at the night of the comet!"

Primadonna smiled and then they went back in the car and then She dropped Elena back at her home and then Pandora to her Orphanage while she was still sleeping.

When she reached back home she cooked some pasta and watched TV while she waited for the night of the comet.

𝐍𝐨𝐰 𝐥𝐨𝐚𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐠. . .

A/n :- Thanks alot for the reads it means alot, good bye everyone and I hope you liked the chapter!! There is alot stored in for you and we even have a female love interest for awhile?

[show-choir-gal]

How You Two Meet - Dead Poets Society Preference

Masterlist of Masterlists

Guide: Y/N: Your Name Y/F/N: Your First Name Y/L/N: Your Last Name

Warnings: Mentions of death in Gerard's

Neil Perry: You met when you both auditioned for a play at a community theatre Audition day has arrived, but Neil was more nervous than ever. The boys accompanied him into the theatre just in case something were to go wrong. Neil was reading over the audition lines, which come from Romeo and Juliet. The boys were really hyping Neil up in the back of the theatre until an older man came up on stage and got everyone's attention. "Attention everyone. Thank you for coming out for the auditions for Antony and Cleopatra. I truly believe we will have a wonderful cast for such a great Shakespearean tragedy. Ladies, please hand my assistant your paperwork and line up for your audition. You will perform your monologue onstage by yourself and then you will exit and take a seat. We will have a brief break and then begin with the men. Break a leg." He said as he exited the stage and sat in his seat next to the assistant he mentioned previously. One after the other, girls performed their monologues and the boys gawked. But then you got onstage and the group of boys just stopped dead in their tracks. "Hello, I am Y/F/N Y/L/N and I will be auditioning for Cleopatra." You performed your monologue of Juliet II ii 85 with all the passion and strive you could muster. Once you finished you had a standing ovation. You bowed and sat next to a girl you befriended at the audition. The girl auditions finished up and you all went on a brief break so the boys could prepare. "Neil, if you don't go after her, I will" Charlie said cheekily as he elbowed his friend. "That was the most beautiful and talented girl I have ever seen." Neil said as he looked in your direction across the room. It was soon the boys turn and one by one they went across the stage and performed, and then appeared Neil. "I'm Neil Perry and I will be auditioning for Antony." He performed his heart out, reciting Romeo III iii 33. He sat down right behind you. When all the auditions were officially over, the director came on the stage once more, "Brava ladies and gentlemen. Those were some amazing auditions and my assistant and I will have a hard time deciding the roles. This can take up to an hour so just be prepared. You were all amazing but remember that we have to make decisions. See you all in an hour or so."Just as the director and assistant left to deliberate on the casting, Neil turned towards his group of friends who were all enthusiastically giving him 'thumbs ups'. Neil smiled and turned back around. Suddenly you turned to the boy behind you. "Neil, is it?" "Uh, yeah I'm Neil. And you're Y/F/N, right?" "Yup! I wanted to let you know you were amazing up there! I was really invested. You have a promising career as an actor, I can't wait to work with you." You said with a smile as you turned back to the girl next to you and started chatting up a storm. Neil's heart melted at the thought of just simply being around you.

Todd Anderson: You were chilling in Mr.Keating's classroom because he's your dad You were sitting in a desk in the middle of your dads classroom, discussing some novels and plays before his students showed up for the class. You and your dad were discussing the interesting aspects tagged along with Franz Kafka's "The Metamorphosis" when you were suddenly interrupted by a few boys entering the room. "Don't mind them, they like to come early." Your dad said as he waved the boys into the classroom with a smile. "How was Death of A Salesman, Mr.Keating?" Neil asked, knowing he went to see the play over the weekend. "Oh magnificent Mr.Perry. I do wish I could've brought you boys with me but I had some great company with me either way." Your dad as he shot you a smile. "Oh did you bring a lady friend with you?" Knox asked but as soon as those rolled off his tongue you shifted uncomfortably in your seat. "We keep forgetting about this doll in Todd's seat. Who are you darling?" Charlie asked as he looked from Todd to you and winked. Your dad chimed in before you could get a word in, "That is Y/N. She's my daughter. We actually saw the show together." Charlie blushed and leaned back in his seat, trying and failing to make himself seem smaller. "Sweetheart, I know you had some rather bold opinions of the play. Also you can sit in the front so poor Mr.Anderson can sit down." Your dad said as he motioned to a desk near his desk. You looked back at Todd who was staring, he turned and blushed as your rose from the seat you were just occupying. "I am so sorry Todd." You replied as you got up and moved seats. Todd quickly sat down but started to stare again as you began to explain how you felt about the play you had seen with your father.

Charlie Dalton: Select girls are allowed to attend Welton, and you were chosen and played in the schools orchestra Welton was known for only letting in some of the best, and when they were letting up to 10 girls into the school for the very first time, your parents did not hesitate to make sure you got one of those spots. Top of your class, president and captain of several clubs and teams, and first chair in the saxophone section with several professional orchestras vying for your skill made Mr.Nolan not even hesitate to welcome you to the school. You walked into your first class of the day. which was English, with your bag on your back and your saxophone case in your hand. You walked in and everyone turned around and stared at you in awe. "Miss Y/L/N, I was wondering when you would be joining us! You can take the empty seat next to Mr.Dalton and tell us a little about yourself." Mr.Keating said with a smile as you made your way to the empty seat. "I'm Y/N, I transferred from a boarding school about an hour away from here. I am top of my class and I play first chair saxophone." "That's brilliant! I love seeing a bright, young mind in my presence. I see you have your instrument with you, would you liked to play something for us?" "Uhm, yeah I would love to." You replied with a smile as you took out your saxophone and assembled it and tuned it. "This is Flight of the Bumblebee, one of the most difficult songs to play on any instrument." "Do you need someone to hold your music?" Charlie asked, rather enthusiastically. "No thank you, I actually have the piece memorised." Charlie looked sad but immediately perked up when you started to play. You were so engrossed by playing you you didn't notice Charlie making heart eyes and melting as he stared at the beauty in front of him.

Steven Meeks: You're staying your uncle Keating at Welton for the year as a foreign exchange student You and Keating just finished the meeting with Mr.Nolan about the terms and conditions about your stay. It was early in the morning and Keating offered to make you a cup of tea before classes were supposed to start, you agreed and stayed in Keating's classroom. It was supposed to be about another 45 minutes before classes began, so you popped a Beatles album into the record player and was just sitting at Keating's desk and absorbed the atmosphere of an American classroom. You were reading "Catcher in the Rye" as you waited for you uncle to come back to the classroom. You heard some robust laughter come closer to the room and you recognised it as your uncles but there were other voices you didn't recognise. You looked up from the book as soon as the laughter was in the classroom. Your uncle entered with two students by his side, he gave you your cup of tea and looked at the boys. "Mr.Pitts and Mr.Meeks, this is my niece Y/F/N. She's an exchange student from England this year. Can you boys help her around during the day so she doesn't get too lost?" Keating asked with a smile. Both boys were starstruck by the girl in front of them, but Steven was falling in love by the moment. Gerard snapped out of the fit first and elbowed Steven to get his attention back to the real world. "Of course I can Mr.Keating." Steven stumbled out, Gerard just facepalmed as you looked at your uncle and both of you chuckled. Steven finally noticed the music playing, and he may not listen to music all that often but he didn't recognise. "I really like this song, who sings it?" Steven asked shyly. Your eyes went wide open and your mouth went agape, "Do they not have The Beatles here in the States?! Let me show you them, they're AMAZING!" You grabbed Steven's hand and led him over to the record player. Keating looked at you two and back at Gerard with a smile, knowing that look better than any poet he's ever researched.

Richard Cameron: You two competed against one another several times during debate competitions First debate competition of the year was in a few hours. The two teams were in the respective classrooms preparing for the competition ahead. You had to go use the restroom so you excused yourself and walked over to where the restroom was located. You bumped into someone as you rounded the corner. "I am so sorry, I didn't see you there. Are you okay?" The boy asked. "Yeah I'm perfectly fine, just got a little spooked." You replied with a smile as you made eye contact with the boy in front of you, you blushed. He stuck his hand out with a smile, "Richard Cameron, Welton Academy." You returned the smile and took his hand, "Y/F/N Y/L/N, Hamilton Academy. I look forward to seeing you on the debate court." You shook his hand as you winked and walked toward the bathroom.

Knox Overstreet: You tutor his sister back at home Knox was coming home today, his parents told you that before they left to pick him up and bring him home. You were tutoring his younger sister in English and geography. She wasn't bad by any means, but her parents always believed she could do better. You never pushed her too far because she would always reiterate that she is doing the very best she can. You knew how it was to be pushed passed your breaking point and you would never want to do that to a student you tutor. You two took a break and the front door flung open and the sound of teenage boy filled the hallway. He immediately went upstairs and put his stuff away as his parents came into the kitchen to ask how their daughter was doing. In the middle of the conversation Knox came into the kitchen as well. He immediately stopped in his tracks as he made eye contact with you, you blushed as soon as he smiled. "My my, Knox Overstreet, I hadn't seen you since you started attending Welton. You look dashing if I may say so, growing into a fine young man." You said with a smile. "Wow Y/F/N, you look beautiful yourself. Going to be an amazing woman one day." He said as blushed back at you. "Maybe, Y/N, if you're not too busy you could tutor Knox as well. Make sure he doesn't lose his muster during break." His father chimed in. His sister came in unexpectedly and said, "I think he just needs a tutor in general, I'm pretty sure I'm smarter than him." This earned a chuckle from everyone and a blush from Knox and you shot an empathetic glance his way

Gerard Pitts: You met when you were forced to attend Welton by your father, Mr.Nolan, because your grades were slipping "You are attending Welton and that is final, young lady." Your father practically spat at you. You got up in a huff as he escorted you to your English class. "Mr.Nolan, what brings you in here for today?" Mr.Keating asked with his usual smile. He practically shoved you into the classroom, "This is my daughter Y/N. She's going to be attending here because her grades slipped too low for my standards elsewhere. Don't go easy on her." Mr.Keating shot you an empathetic glance, "You may sit next to Mr.Pitts. And rest assured Mr.Nolan, I will help whip her into shape in no time." Mr.Keating motioned to the empty chair with a smile. You walked to the empty seat and sat down. Gerard could not take his eyes off you. Mr.Keating had everyone work on a poem as he came over to your desk to ask you if everything was alright. Gerard was tuning in. "I don't know anymore My mum didn't even want me to come here. I got one C because my friend passed away and suddenly it's the end of the world for my father. You'd think he would care a little more since I'm his only child, you know?" You ranted, letting a single tear roll down your face. Gerard immediately noticed and got a tissue and gave it to you. "Thank you that was really sweet." You said with a shy smile. "Well, I can't let a pretty girl cry when I'm around." He said with a smile filled with empathy.

[calliopewritings]

only look at me

jaemin x genderneutral!reader

word count: 4.65k

you should’ve known. you mistook kindness for love.

warnings/tags: best friends to lovers (idiots to lovers), fluff, angst

songfic inspired by only - day6 !

-

Beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful, beautiful you

I love you

Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, wonderful, wonderful you

I want you to know

My dedication to you

In this world

Perhaps you’re the one person

Who doesn’t know it

The amount of colour decorating the school hallways was almost hurting your eyes, several large “PROM!” signs plastered onto the walls, and decorative garlands across the ceilings. Your school really went all out for prom… and it wasn’t even prom night. In fact, prom wasn’t until next week, but the decorations couldn’t wait it seemed. Despite the excessive amounts of glitter stuck to any available surface, you found the corners of your mouth quirking up in fondness at the sight of several promposals being accepted. 

It wasn’t like your heart was made of stone and it was nice to see everyone smiling. There’d been no disastrous prom-related events yet, and you hoped it’d stay that way - you much preferred the promposals with happy endings. You won’t lie and say you didn’t gag at the couple excessively making out in the hallway yesterday, after a sweet promposal, but you’d rather have some not-so-PG-13 action than you’d have people holding back tears as they make a run for the bathroom. 

Grabbing some necessary books from your locker, you paid special attention to some students not far from you. The guy down the hallway, currently mid-promposal was in your Physics class, you knew him fairly well. When the girl accepted and pulled him in for an awkward - but sweet - hug, you smiled in relief. Must be nice, you thought. 

You were shaken from your thoughts when you sensed a sudden presence leaning on the locker beside yours. “What’s got my beautiful angel smiling today?” leaning softly on the locker was your best friend, a cheeky smile on his face. You huffed out a breath “you need to cool it Jaemin, my urge to resort to violence grows every day.”

“Guess I’ll have to try harder.” He pushed off the lockers and offered his hand, “May I lead you to Social Studies, love?” With a shake of your head, you accepted his hand. 

“Do you even listen?” He shrugged. “Your eyes say it all, baby,” he teased, pushing his face into yours, and your nose scrunched at the mere cheesiness. Your head told you it was stupid, he’d just delivered the most generic line ever, but your heartbeat picked up its’ pace and you couldn’t seem to calm it. 

The thing with Jaemin was, he looked at you with what seemed like all the love in the universe, and honestly, you probably did the same with him. Problem was, you weren’t sure that meant anything, at least not to him. He had always been the flirty type, he often made moves on you, but they never meant anything, that was just how he was. Besides, he cared immensely for everyone. That was one of the things you admired about him, his ability to care so much, even for strangers. He was always putting other people ahead of himself. He looked at everyone with love, you were sure. 

You turned your head to look at your best friend - he was already looking at you. Your eyes met his, and your breath hitched at the close proximity, eyes wide in surprise. You didn’t like it one bit. How your breath was ripped from your lungs whenever he came too close, or whenever you agreed to go to the arcade instead of doing homework, and he beamed that beautiful smile of his. You hated that he looked at you with stars in his eyes, and that he took your breath away, and that he held your hand whenever you’d stand next to each other. You hated it because you loved it so much. You loved him so much. But that also meant you could lose him, and you didn’t want to lose him - your best friend, your comfort, your Jaemin. 

So you turned your head again, breaking the eye contact and picking up your pace, as you entered the classroom which you’d reached. Jaemin followed as you took a seat at the back, and he watched as you brought out your book and your colour-coded pens. You felt his gaze. He looked at you with love.

-

You always

Follow my gaze

With uncertainty in your eyes

Packing your notes back into your bag, you got ready to leave school for the day. You and Jaemin lived close to each other, so you always walked home together. At the cross-section where you had to part ways, he’d always give you at least two flying kisses and a not-very-threatening threat to text when you’d gotten home. 

You knew his last lesson of the day was Math, so you went in the direction of his classroom to find him. As you were about to round a corner, you recognised the voice of your best friend speaking. Under normal circumstances, you’d keep walking, but his words made you stop dead in your tracks. 

“Will you go to prom with me?”

Heart in your throat, you dared to sneak a peek at the scene. One second was all you needed, you knew the girl. She was in your Literature class - Jieun - very sweet, caring, fun. You’d never heard a single bad thing uttered about her. You were sure they would look good together, no doubt she’d treat him well. You wanted him to find someone who would treat him well. 

So then, why was your vision slowly blurring? 

However, it wasn’t the person he asked that caught your attention, it was the way he looked at her. He looked at her with love. You should’ve known. You mistook kindness for love. You left in a hurry.

-

Baby, you are my only love

My love is not two

There is only one

So no need to worry, love

I wish you could entrust yourself to my love

And only look at me

“I’ll message you later, then?” You walked side by side with your new partner for the literature assignment. You managed to discuss it a bit as you made your way to the cafeteria. “Sounds good, Jieun,” you agreed, and the girl smiled back at you with an enthusiastic nod of her head. 

You spotted Jaemin at your table, out of the corner of your eye, and just as Jieun was about to part from you and go to her friends, you placed a hesitant hand on her arm. “Uh, do you- do you maybe want to join us for lunch? I-I mean Jaemin and I?” and immediately feared her answer. It was already clear to you, the way she’d be smiling at him, and he’d smile back at her, and it would be sickeningly cute. Maybe he’d hold her hand - he usually held yours - and they’d share food - he always gave you the sweets on the side “they’re almost as sweet as you” he’d add - they’d make a good couple…

To your surprise, Jieun gave a shake of her head, smile still bright, “It’s okay, I won’t disrupt the two of you. Besides, one of my friends owes me lunch.” And then she was off, hurrying towards her own table. Perplexed, but relieved, you went to take a seat with Jaemin, who greeted you with a big smile. 

You finished your lunch faster than usual. His heart eyes were becoming increasingly suffocating to you. 

As you and Jaemin got up and started walking to the next class, you were stopped by someone behind you. “I-I’m sorry but-” the guy looked a little nervous as his eyes flickered between you and Jaemin, and rested for a while on your linked hands. Then he took a deep breath in and looked straight into your eyes. “Y/n, can I talk to you for a second?” Your brows furrowed in slight confusion - Jaemin’s hand tightened around yours. 

The guy’s pleading eyes bore into yours and you could tell he was nervous about something. Letting go of your best friend’s hand, you gave him a small smile, “Go ahead, I’ll be right there,” you assured, and he hesitantly left in the direction of the classroom. 

You focused your attention on the stranger in front of you. “How can I help you?” you asked, a small smile on your lips. He nervously shifted his weight, “You probably don’t know me, and uh- uh we don’t have any classes together, but… I- uh- I’ve seen you around and I think you seem really nice so…-” he visibly gulped and your brows furrowed even further. When he spoke again, he did it so quickly you barely registered it, “WouldYouMaybeWantToBeMyDateForProm?” and he ended it with a nervous chuckle. 

It took you a couple of seconds to register it fully - and then you felt awful. You didn’t want to reject the guy, he seemed sweet. What if he cries? You couldn’t do that to him, no way. But then… you also couldn’t accept. It wouldn’t be fair to him - not when you knew who you’d be thinking of on prom night. 

You looked into his shaking eyes and forced the words out of your mouth. 

“I’m sorry, but… I’m not really looking for a prom date,” you told him. It wasn’t really a lie. Well only partly at least. You were in fact looking for a prom date, but only if he went by the name of Na Jaemin. 

He gave sad smile in return. “Ah, that’s okay. Honestly, I was kind of expecting this outcome,” he rubbed his neck anxiously as his eyes flickered back and forth. Then he cleared his throat, “But hey! If you find yourself in need of a dance partner at prom, feel free to approach me.” You let out a small chuckle, “Of course,” you assured, and his eyes lit up, the sad smile from before dissipating.  

When you settled next to Jaemin in class, he looked a little distraught. You linked your pinky finger with his, which was resting on the desk, and gave him a curious look. “Everything okay?” He merely gave a tight smile in return and turned his attention to the teacher who’d just entered. With a small frown, you did the same and directed your attention to the board. However, your mind was on your best friend. Maybe something was wrong… 

You tapped his hand with your pinky and you saw his eyes flitting to you. “Want to go to the arcade today?” you offered, hoping to cheer him up, and it seemed to work. His gaze was once again on you and the corners of his mouth lifted a little. His eyes filled with love. You didn’t mind this time, you just didn’t want to see him down. You wanted him to keep looking at you like that. 

-

Why would I look at some else?

When the person right in front of me

Is the most beautiful being

In the entire world

It was raining, and it was raining hard. You’d just gotten up to leave for the day when the rain started violently pouring from above. Umbrella in hand, you rushed to get to the gym hall where Jaemin would be. It was located away from the rest of the building, to get there you’d have to run through the rain, which was fine for you - you had the umbrella. However, Jaemin did not have an umbrella. He’d given his own to someone else that very morning when the rain has been light, as he noticed they were trying to shield their face from the rain with their hands. With no umbrella, he’d merely snuggled under yours and you’d shared. 

You and Jaemin usually met at the front gate, and you had no doubt that, despite his lack of shield against the harsh rain, he’d run outside just to get to your meeting spot. So you ran for the gym hall. Luckily, your teacher let you off a couple of minutes before class ended, so you hoped you’d be able to reach him before he stupidly walked into the rain and caught a cold. 

You got there just in time - he was just about to step into the rain when you reached him. He looked surprised to see you there and rested a comforting hand on your shoulder as you put your hands on your knees and caught your breath. “Y/n? Did you run here?” You huffed out a small “Yes,” as you regained your posture, having caught your breath. He sent an amused smile your way and you sent a bright one in return. His smile took away your breath, just as it always did, but you were just happy to have gotten there in time. 

You opened up the umbrella you’d carried, and he stepped under it with you. 

“Thanks, Angel.” You turned your head to see him still smiling at you. He looked at you with love. His hair stuck lightly to his forehead, probably from showering after PE, but the rain had wet his skin slightly as well. Quite simply, he looked ethereal to you (he always did though). Your breath caught again, and your heart sped up like crazy as you took in the sight of your best friend. You looked at him with love too. 

-

You also know in your heart

That I can’t lie

I think you feel my sincerity

A squeal pierced through your ears and you grimaced at the sound. Your friend, Sooyoung, grabbed you by the shoulders, shaking you lightly. “You look just dashing! Want to get married?” with a chuckle you gestured for her to turn around, “Just let me zip you up, silly.” 

Prom night arrived quicker than expected - to be honest, you’d been fearing it a bit. You didn’t want to worry about Jieun and Jaemin slow dancing, gazing lovingly at each other, which is why you made Sooyoung promise to not leave your side. 

You zipped up her dress and she immediately sat the two of you down on the bed. “Do you want me to rig the votes? I can make you and Jaemin win?” you noted that she sounded a bit too excited at the prospect and quickly denied. “No way! He’s there with Jieun!” 

Your friend let out a sigh and went to put on her earrings, “If you say so Y/n. Just let me know if you need anything, I’m not opposed to crime either, you know.” With a chuckle, you threw a nearby pillow at the girl, “Don’t make me an accomplice when you actually commit a crime one day, Sooyoung.” She merely smiled at your remark and threw the pillow right back at you. “But that’s what friends are for!” And she pulled you into a hug which had you both toppling over on her bed. 

At least you’d have Sooyoung by your side tonight - someone to take your mind of Jaemin and Jieun and the way they’d look perfect next to each other. Maybe their parents are taking cute photos of them right now… Maybe they’ll be leaving in Jaemin’s car soon… Maybe she’ll sit in the passenger seat, which is usually reserved for you. At least she’s sweet. She’ll be so good to him. She’ll look at him with love. That’s good… Right? 

-

I have no thoughts of sharing this love

With anyone other than you

I am ready only for you

The over-the-top decorations in the hallways were clearly just a small appetiser to the real deal because the school gym hall was absolutely stuffed with decorations and - though the amount of glitter that adorned the room made you fear you might choke and die on it - you were stunned at how pretty it was. Tables filled with snack and drinks placed on your left, Sooyoung on your right. She nudged you with her elbow, “Let’s pillage the snack table,” and then she was pulling you by the hand with newfound animosity in her eyes. 

After half an hour by the snacks, you were able to convince Sooyoung she’d stolen enough already. “I could’ve fit at least three more mini pizzas in there, you know, and those are heavenly the day after,” she complained, and you gave her arm a weak slap. “I’ll buy you as many mini pizzas as you want, as long as you stop stuffing them in your bag,” you assured her, and she turned you to look at her, pinky in the air. “Pinky promise?” With a nod and an amused smile, you linked your finger with hers. “Pinky promise.”

Distraught by Sooyoung, you didn’t notice Jaemin and Jieun talking nearby, nor did you notice his eyes on you the entire time. 

With Sooyoung in the bathroom, you’d sat down at a vacant table to relax a bit. You jumped in your seat, startled, when you felt a hand on your shoulder. Whipping your head to see who the owner of the hand was, you were surprised to see Jaemin standing there with a sheepish smile. “Care for a dance?” He offered his hand to you. Slightly stunned, you slowly took his hand and got up. Is it wrong? He was there with someone else after all. Where is Jieun? 

He led you to the dance floor and gingerly placed his hands on your waist as he pulled you closer. Once again, your breath hitched at the proximity but you didn’t dare to make eye contact. Uncertain hands snaked around his neck and settled there. “How’s your night so far?” he asked with a smile as he made you do a small twirl. The twirl caught you off guard, and you found yourself smiling at the unexpected move. “It’s been good. Apprehended a criminal earlier,” you replied, and he chuckled. “Yeah, I noticed Sooyoung’s not-so-subtle theft.”

As the song slowly came to an end, you couldn’t take his gaze on you anymore. “Don’t look at me like that,” you told him - harsher than you intended, but just as you were about to apologise, his face inched closer to yours. “Like what?” he teased. You didn’t respond - not verbally at least. Your body was screaming at you, responding in almost every way possible. You merely turned your head to the side. His gaze, which you barely caught out of the corner of your eye, turned from teasing to worried. “Angel?” You hummed in acknowledgement, and he let out a sigh. “Want to get out of here?” he offered, and you turned to face him again, head tilted in confusion. What about Jieun? “What-What about your date?” you asked, incredulous, and you’d never seen your best friend look so perplexed. “I don’t have a date?”

Your heart twisted in stupid hope, and you tried to stop it. He doesn’t have a date? How? Where is Jieun anyway? You searched the room for said girl, but couldn’t spot her anywhere. Did she reject him? No way, right? With a million thoughts floating through your head, your best friend shook you back to reality, and you noticed his curious eyes on you. 

“You really don’t have a date?” you asked again, and he shook his head. “Ok then,” you gave a nod. “Let’s go.”

You expected him to smile and lead you out then, but you could tell he was now battling something in his head. Mouth opening and closing, he asked a hesitant question. “What about yours?” Your head tilted in confusion again. “My… what?” 

“Your date.” He said as if it were obvious, and you let out a noise of confusion. “I don’t have a date either. Why would I have a date? Who would even be my date?” you spluttered, flabbergasted at his assumption. Jaemin looked just as surprised as you did, completely frozen it seemed. He slowly regathered his wits again, and took a hold of your hand, “Well, let’s go then.”

Don’t worry

This love is yours

There is no one else for me but you

Hold onto me tightly with both hands

And please don’t let go, you

You entered Jaemin’s car, taking your usual spot in the passenger seat. Jaemin never drove to school but sometimes he’d stop by your house and insist you join him for a trip to the beach. Countless hours were spent in the passenger seat of his car - on sunny days, with the radio on, and full hearts.

He started the car and rolled onto the road, you knew exactly where he was going. Your town had a secluded hillside - like one from a horror movie, where the kids get murdered, except this one was beautiful and safe and it reminded you of Jaemin. He first took you there, when someone at school had thrown their drink at you because you refused to do their homework for them. You didn’t want to see anyone that day, so Jaemin took you to the hillside and assured you no one would disturb you there. Back then, he didn’t have the car, you were kids, so he’d grabbed you by the hand and started the 15-minute walk… That was many years ago.

“Why don’t you have a date?” he asked, and you turned to look at him. His eyes were on the road. You let out a small giggle at the question. “What do you mean?” You noticed his lips slowly turning into a pout. You knew he wasn’t aware of the cute pout forming on his face - you took your time admiring him. 

“I just- That guy… That day in the hallway. I was sure he’d ask you out,” he told you, and you unconsciously bit your lip. “Yeah, he did,” you admitted, and his head turned to you for a quick second, before flitting back to the road. 

“Then why-”

“I didn’t really know him,” you told him. Again, technically not a lie. He slowly nodded in understanding. He pulled onto a more secluded road, and you knew you were nearing the destination. 

“What about you?” You turned to look at him, “Why don’t you have a date?” His mouth opened as if to speak, but he closed it again. You decided to speak up then instead, “To be honest, I overheard you one day in the hallway,” you told him, and his face contorted in confusion. “I heard you ask out Jieun, Jaemin.” The car was silent for a moment, you waited for him to speak up. “I’m sorry, I really didn’t mean to listen in on it. I don’t know why you two are not here together, but whatever the reason is, you should know that anyone would be a fool to reject you and-”

“You think I wanted to bring Jieun to prom?” he asked, incredulous, as the car came to a stop at the destination. Perplexed, you looked at your friend, “Why else would you ask her?”

You saw him hesitate for a second, before he stepped out of the car, and walked to the viewpoint. You followed him. 

“I was practising asking someone else out,” he told you, with a blush slowly spreading across his cheeks, and looked at your best friend in slight wonder. “You looked at her very fondly though,” you shrugged, and focused your attention on the city below you. You sensed his eyes on you. 

“Why would I look at someone else, when the person right in front of me, is the most beautiful?”

One second. Two seconds. You lost count. Did he- Did he say that to you? No one else is here. No way. You turned to catch the gaze of your best friend - your breath hitched and your heart beat so loud you couldn’t hear anything else. He looked at you with so much love, he always did. So why does it seem different now? You never wanted him to stop. You caught his eyes flickering - to your eyes, your nose, your cheeks, your lips - as if he were trying to read you. He was nervous. 

“J-Jaemi-”

“I can’t think straight with you,” he interrupted. The world spun a little faster around you. “Angel, you are my only love. There is no one else for me but you. I thought I made it obvious, but- perhaps you’re the one person who doesn’t know it,” he let out a soft chuckle, and it tugged on your heartstrings and warmed your cheeks. Your hands itched to reach out and hold his, but you stayed put. 

“Jieun offered to help me practice. I was practising asking you out.” His eyes settled on the ground, head low, he looked like a child being scolded. “I’m sorry if you don’t feel the same. I- uh- I just wanted you to know, you know?” he softly kicked a rock on the ground as he rubbed his neck anxiously. You could do nothing but stare at him in adoration - you’d never seen your best friend like this before. You should’ve known. You mistook love for kindness. 

“Even if you- If you don’t feel the same, I’ll always be here for you… If you want…” and his eyes slowly looked up to meet yours. Questioning gaze boring into yours. You weren’t sure how you were looking at him, but perhaps it didn’t quite radiate the overwhelming warmth he’d caused all over your body, because he seemed embarrassed, stuttering out another apology. “I-I’m sorry, I’ll give you some space, I shouldn’t have-” but you didn’t let him finish his sentence. Instead, you gave in, and let your hands reach out to grab his, as you used the grip to pull him closer to you. When your chest pressed against his, you heard his breath hitch - you weren’t sure how long you’d been holding your own. Your arms wrapped around his waist as you hugged him tightly. 

“The last thing I want from you is space,” you told him honestly, and pulled back to look him in the eyes. His eyes were still a pool of uncertainty, and you realised your response hadn’t cleared up your feelings very well. Though you had to wonder if he couldn’t feel your heart beating wildly against his own. You placed a gentle hand on his cheek, hoping to bring the nervous boy some comfort, and then you kissed him. 

The kiss was slow, but sure, and the moment your lips met, you felt him exhale into the kiss. His arms relaxed around you, and his nervousness faded bit by bit. Letting the hand that wasn’t caressing his cheek, pull him closer by the neck, you deepened the kiss. You didn’t want to part ways until you’d made sure there would be no space to doubt, just how much you loved him back. In turn, his arms tightened around your waist and you were pulled flush against him. 

You wanted to keep going, to shower him with kisses, but you couldn’t help your happy giggle, and he soon followed. With lovestruck smiles on your faces, you both pulled back, foreheads resting against each other. “My love is yours, Jaemin, all yours.” 

He let out a boyish giggle and hugged you tighter. “My angel is all mine,” he teased with a cheeky smile and you fake gagged at his antics. He only smiled brighter as he brought you in for a kiss. When you pulled away, you caught his gaze. You looked at each other with love. 

I got only one love

Not two

For you

I got only one love

Just the one

I got only one love

Not two

For you

I wish you could entrust yourself to my love

And only look at me

[jotaros-left-nut]

Josuke’s little girl

Your daughters name Y/d/n

You checked the house number for the 4th time before, this definitely the higashikata household, you rang the door and waited nervously for someone to open up, “Josuke, see who’s at the door”, you recognised that voice anywhere it was tomoko, I never been so nervous about anything before, I hope he’s happy to me see, after a year of only talking to him on the phone, the door opened it to reveal, your beautiful boyfriend in his school uniform, he has a comb in his left hand, when he saw you he dropped his comb to the floor and pulled you in for a hug, you put one arm around his slim waist, you missed the warmth of his body against yours, he looked down to see a toddler holding your other hand

“Who is this?” You picked her up and placed her on your hip, “This is your daughter Y/d/n”, you say bouncing her on your hip because she was now burying her little face in your T-shirt, she’s shy around new people, “Come in I don’t want her getting cold” he closed the door after the two of you and lead you into the living room, you took a seat on the sofa, he sat down on the seat next to yours, “Can I hold her?” He asked eyeing the little one who was still hiding her face, you nodded your head and picked her up and gave her to her father

He was so gentle when picking her up, He looked at her little face and could immediately see himself, her eyes were closed shut, she was so excitedly see him before, “Y/d/n, open your eyes” you told her in a soft voice, she shook her head no, “Don’t you wanna see what daddy looks like?” You asked the small child, “Daddy?” She whispered very quietly, excited to finally meet him, she slowly opened her eyes to look him, but immediately shut them again, there was a little smile on her face, Josuke smiled at her “Don’t worry, Y/d/n were gonna have plenty of time to get to know each other”, he told his daughter in the softest voice

“Why didn’t you tell me you were pregnant?” He asked watching the toddler who was playing with his oversized heat pin on his jacket, “When I went to study abroad I didn’t know I was pregnant for a long time, but when I realised, I pankier because, I will sound kinda dumb now that I’m saying It out loud but, I thought I was protecting you, I knew your mum would kill you and I didn’t want you to drop out” It definitely didn’t sound all that smart when you said it out loud “You wanted to protect me? you must have gone through hell all by yourself” he sounded so sympathetic “Don’t worry, I had some family helping me”

“So what made you change your mind and finally tell me?” He concentrated on his daughter making sure she doesn’t fall from his lap “Well I knew I had to tell you eventually and my program ended and” you were caught guard when Tomoko poked her head around the door, “Who was it at the door?” Her hard gaze soften when she saw you, she smiled at you as a hello, you smiled back at her but her eyes went wide when she saw a toddler on her son’s lap, “Whose baby is that?” she asked with worry in her voice, “This is our daughter, Y/d/n”, She picked the toddler up from her son’s arms and examined her, “She's got your blue eyes and her hair is already touching her shoulders she's definitely yours” she placed Y/d/n in your arms, “Mom, can you unfreeze my account so I can pay for baby stuff?” josuke asked his mother, with his hands pressed together in a praying motion

“Look, I have to go work, I’ll unfreeze it on the way and you better pay for baby stuff and only baby stuff, but we will talk about the living arrangements when I get back, For the baby’s sake I’ll call the school and tell them that you won’t be attending for a while, She left the room, you here the door open, JOSUKE!, ARE YOU THERE? He walked into the room. Aren't you coming to school today?, he “Hey Y\n it feels like I haven’t seen you in a while, is this your little sister? She is so cute” he crouched down in front, “This is Y\d\n, my, our daughter” Josuke told his close friend, “Does that mean I’m an uncle?” he sounded so excited “I guess so” Josuke replied to back back, “My...name...is ...Okuyasu, I’m your daddy’s best friend in the wwwhhhhooolllee wiiiddddeeee world” he playfully shook her tiny hands, “But you can just call me, uncle yasu”

“Do need to get some baby stuff?, because There’s a huge box of baby things from when my uh Mr joestar, bought all that stuff for Shizuka, I’ll get it” josuke got up from his chair and walked towards the garage, remember josuke telling me that Shizuka is his adopted sister, you thought to yourself, Okuyasu sat down where josuke was sitting, “Y\n can I hold her?” Okuyasu asked “Of course,” you said, she has to start getting used to being around people, it's better to start early you put Y\d\n to her feet, Okuyasu held his arms out for her, she was hesitant at first but, she slowly walked towards, he picked her up, “I'm gonna be the best uncle ever, he said to her holding the toddler on his hip, Josuke came pushing a pram into the room with 2 cardboard boxes labelled baby stuff resting on it, There are every type of, pacifiers, diaper and baby bottles in these two boxes and here's a pram” You smiled at him, “This is perfect Josuke thank you” you got up from the chair and pulled your boyfriend into a hug, can he be any more perfect? You thought to yourself, you stood up on your tiptoes and kissed his chin, he got the hint and leaned down to kiss you on the lips

The phone rang, Josuke broke the kiss to go answer it, “Hello...Oh hi, Koichi….No me and Okuyasu aren't coming in today….It's because I’m spending time with my….daughter...I know it was a shock too but there's no doubt she's mine... okay I’ll see you after school” he put the phone down, “It was Koichi” he walked back to us in the front room, and sat into the other seat, What are we gonna do about a baby crib?

-

A couple of hours have passed, You heard a knock at the door, you went to open it revealing, your boyfriend, and your daughter who was peacefully sleeping in his arms, with his free hands he pushing the pram, which contained two huge bags strapped to where the baby would sit and a baby crib box resting on top of it,

You took your daughter, out of his hands, so he can concentrate on getting everything in, “So how as she?” You asked your boyfriend who was pushing the pram behind you, “She was no bother it didn’t take long for her to open up to me, we were best friends in no time” you smiled at that thought, “Did You make sure to feed her and change her diaper?” You asked raising your eyebrow at him, “Of course, like her father she can eat a lot” A huge smile spread on your face, you picked up one of the bags but your boyfriend stopped you, “Let’s go upstairs”

“Okay, Are you sure your gonna be able to manage that?” He picked up the boxed crib and held it above his head, “Of course I can” you picked up the two bags that were heavy but you to managed and followed behind him, “How did the job thing go?” He asked, “It was alright, I must have given out about 30 cv’s, I’m just hoping a get a call soon” you replied dropping the bags as soon as you take one step in

“How did you get the money to afford all of this?” you asked your boyfriend, who Had put the box down and open it, He didn’t even look at the instructions, but begun suddenly, all of the pieces began to move and fit together as it was magic, you watched in amazement, you knew that josuke has a stand that you’ve never seen, but it will still cool to watch things move around, he leaned his body over halfway and pressed his hands at the bottom of it, “You can put her in here now, it’s sturdy”, he moved out the way so you can put your daughter in, she was still peacefully asleep

You turned to look at your boyfriend “I’m curious to know what you bought” you told your boyfriend talking in a hushed tone to not wake your baby, you picked up one of the bags and started looking through it “I bought someee, jackets, trousers, jeans, shorts, shoes, and I restocked some of my favourite hair products he told you “And for our daughter?” You asked your boyfriend hoping he remembered to get some stuff for Y/d/n, “Don't worry Y/n, I should never forget about the little one, there should be some jackets, shoes, skirts, dresses and some baby grows in every colour” you laughed surprised he bought so much stuff for a one year old

-

It was now nighttime Koichi has now met her, tomoko came back from work and talked to us about our future plans now we have a toddler to look after, now everyone was washed and in bed clothes, You was thinking, You were planning on going home but josuke convinced you to stay, so here you are laying next to him with your head resting on his shoulder “I wish I would have been there when you were pregnant, I would have rubbed your feet back and stomach, you know i would have done all of that for you” you were now gently playing with fingers, “I know, I wasn’t thinking straight I’ve missed you” you turned around so now you was laying on top of him, He started to run circles into your naked thigh,”I’ve missed you too, I missed how soft your skin felt” you later like that until you eventually fell asleep

-

Your opened your eyes and looked around, for your daughter who was supposed to be in her cot, but she wasn’t there, you panicked and called for your boyfriend but he wasn’t beside you, you got up and ran down the stairs in just his T-shirt that you borrowed from him, you sighed in relief when You saw him sitting there with Y/d/n sitting on his cross legs under a blanket, ”Morning Y/n, hope you slept well” he greeted turning to look at you, Y/d/n turning around to look at too, they looked like twins“I was so scared, I thought she wondered out of her cot”, you walked over to the two of them and picked your daughter up from josuke's lap, “Don’t worry Y/n, she was crying and you was sleeping so I thought that I would sort her out, I picked her up and I noticed that her diaper needed changing, I was so tempted to wake you up when I saw the saw all that crap she produced, but I decided that you not to, it wasn’t that bad, and I feed her but when I went to put her down she didn’t want me to, so me and her have just been hanging out” she smiled at the sight of the two of them she’s already so comfortable with him and it hasn’t even been that long

You join the two of them sitting your daughter in between the both of you, Josuke wrapped the blanket around you but was gentle of the little one, you leaned into your boyfriend and put your head on his shoulder, this couldn’t have ended up any more perfect, you thought to yourself as you watched the colours on the screen

[dearingbooks]

The Difference one Woman can make.

Late Friday night in June, we had stopped for a burger on the way to the cinema, we used to do family movie nights at the cinema when a new film came out that the majority of us wanted to watch, this time I was the one who was reluctant to go, sadly we do this significantly less now.  So, stubborn 2015 me, rolling her eyes and dragging her feet up the cinema steps to find our seats to watch the new Jurassic World movie. Pathetic! I thought, why pay money to watch a movie about a dinosaur theme park! My parents had completely lost it! Huffing and puffing I took my seat on the aisle and sipped my blue raspberry slushie and looked up at the big screen. Ugh! I wanted it to be over, quickly. I sat down and shut my mouth, despite not wanting to watch it, I wasn’t going to spoil it for the others; but I didn’t get why they would want to watch it, I watched the trailer before going, was not impressed, it looked dumb!

However, as much as my pre-Jurassic self would not like, I found who I was during that movie, I discovered a whole new admiration for actors and movies. I found that I related to the main female protagonist, Claire Dearing. She did not need a man, or children, she was so focused on her career and let no one boss her around. She was top dog, and I completely fell for this fictional character. I evolved through that movie with her character, I felt content with being a strong female who put career over family. I wanted to embody this fictional woman; I wanted to be her.

On the journey home I typed ‘Claire Dearing actress’ into google and saw this stunning redhead- Bryce Dallas Howard. I immediately recognised her from movies I had watched prior, and I was completely astounded at her range of characters she can portray and portray them well. After scrolling through her Wiki page and reading news articles about her, I learned that she is the daughter of Ron Howard, one of my parents’ favourite people in film.

“Dad, that woman in the movie is Ron Howard's daughter”, I needed to inform my family that my now favourite woman in film is the daughter of my parents’ favourite people in film. My parents were shocked that I enjoyed the movie despite my loud vocalisation of not wanting to watch it.

Googling ‘Bryce Dallas Howard’ became my new after school routine, learning that she applied to acting school as Bryce Dallas to avoid people knowing she is the daughter of an already famous actor and director, and she had met her true love at nineteen and is still happily married to him. Yet what most stuck out to the self-conscious, body hating 2015 me, was that Bryce wasn’t a skinny twig of a woman that you see in most movies, she had classy curves and promoted body positivity despite some backlash the media gave her. I made a connection with this woman I had never met because I too received negative comments about my figure, yet Bryce took that on the shoulder and learned to love herself. I wanted to feel that self-love about myself that she acquired.

After watching Jurassic World, I explored many more fandoms, and from there I became obsessed with movie franchises and TV shows, actors and directors. I could not give you a full list of all of the fandoms I am in, there are too many to count, and they have all played a role in helping me evolve to who I am today. All because I latched onto one character from one movie I did not even want to watch, one film got me hooked on this life: it’s like a drug. I cannot stop. I also went back and forth with my hairstyle due to this woman; in the movie Bryce has a stunning ginger graduated bob with a fringe, however I never had the guts to go ginger until now; shame the hairdressers are all shut.

Now, almost six years later Bryce Dallas Howard has had great success in directing two episodes of The Mandalorian. Over the Christmas break I watched the show with my dad, sat on the sofa, fire lit, the chocolate Labrador curled up between us, peach vodka and diet lemonade in my hand, hot cup of tea in my dad’s. We binge watched both seasons in a week (it’s amazing) and he was shocked to see ‘Directed by Bryce Dallas Howard’ at the end of one, let alone two episodes. “Shit, she’s come far in the past few years” he said putting another episode on.

Bryce allowed me to find my best friend, Iz, through Instagram; Bryce has brought so many people together it is so surreal. And when I found out that Iz was going to Southampton University in 2019, a 20-minute drive from my house, I was finally able to meet her, because of one woman we both adore. I was friends with Iz for three years before I was able to meet her, I asked my school friend to come along with me so she could film the moment Iz, and I met! We got pancakes and watched the second Maleficent movie at the cinema, it was one of the best days of my life. I was so thankful that I met a truly hilarious and loving girl through this one actress! Because of Bryce Dallas Howard, I have made so many other friends from all over the globe as they too idolise Bryce and together we have created the ‘BDH online family’. A small group of us do regular zoom calls to catch up and chat about the recent photos and updates that Bryce has posted on Instagram, talk about Covid-19 and the types of restrictions and lockdown rules each of our countries has. During one of our calls, we had the craziest idea- Invite Bryce to one of our zoom calls. Bryce said yes! And after a few months of organisation, we had the date. The date was-

My.

Birthday.

The day came around and I was so nervous, it was 11pm exactly. The Wi-Fi had cut out fifteen minutes before the call. I was in tears. Mascara down my face, puffy eyes, I joined the call with a few minutes to spare before Bryce joined it. My mum hung around off camera for the first 5 minutes to double check the Wi-Fi was stable, luckily it stabilised. The other girls had never been so glad to see me, everyone was panicked for me; I could not miss it for the world (despite telling my parents, in floods of tears, that I cannot join and that it’s the end of that).

“Kat! You’re here!” “Happy birthday!” “Are you okay? The Wi-Fi sorted?”

They all chimed, happy to see my little face in the bottom right corner of their computer screens. Luckily Iz was there, otherwise it would have been extremely awkward with only one of us since we are known as a duo in the online family, we have to do everything together, we come in a pair and there can’t just be one of us.

“Shit girls, that was stressful”

I hadn’t realised I was holding my breath until I exhaled the large breath when my    Wi-Fi settled, and I was on the call, I fixed my makeup and was ready to meet Bryce.

The few minutes we had before Bryce joined were intense, two of the girls left to get a drink and we weren’t sure if they would be back in time, luckily they did return.

“No way!” One of them, Anna who was hosting the call, gasped “Bryce is in the waiting room!”

We all freak for no more than 10 seconds, we compose ourselves then our faces are reshuffled, and we see this stunning glowing face that we all admire smiling at us. Omg, it's her.

“Hi girls!”

I have never smiled for so long in my entire life, my cheeks hurt afterwards. Don’t get me wrong, I am not complaining at all, it just hurt as I thought I would only be smiling for half an hour, since that is how long we were told Bryce had. However, we were speaking to Bryce for nearly an hour and a half, she just kept talking and asked us questions! She was so lovely to talk to, so relaxed; it was if I was talking to a friend that I had known for years!

“Before we go I want to all sing Kat a happy birthday!”

My idol wanted to sing me a happy birthday! The other girls were really ecstatic for me, I still can’t believe to this day that The Bryce Dallas Howard wanted to sing to me!

It was both the best and the worst happy birthday song that has be sung to me. It was the best because, well my idol was singing to me! And proposed the singing! It was the worst in terms of the actual song as they were all out of sync and lagging, it was bloody hilarious!

At 10:27pm the next evening, watching a rerun of Game of Thrones on Sky, I got a notification ‘Brycedhoward just posted’, I clicked the notification then see our smiling faces on her page, she posted a screenshot of our call on her social media! The call was supposed to be a secret so other fans weren’t upset. There’s a few snotty comments on the post, but they’re just jealous and to be frank, I don’t care! My smiley face is on her page forever! All ten of us have printed the screenshot of Bryce’s post off and put it in a frame, one day all ten of us hope to congregate somewhere, most likely in America, and sign the backs of all of our photos. I’m still in utter awe and shock-  How many celebrities have you seen that would do a free zoom call with some fans? Not a lot, and that amount is even slimmer when they talk for an extra hour than scheduled. Bryce truly is one of a kind and the best idol anyone could ever hope to have.

Compared to a zoom call with Bryce herself, the few times she has liked my comments on her posts feel like nothing in comparison! I remember being so excited, running downstairs to my parents.

“Mum! Dad! Bryce liked my comment! She knows I exist!”

“Was it actually her? Remember when you got a Facebook request from Robert Downey Jr and it turned out it was a fake account?”

I rolled my eyes at her, it was Bryce, it was her verified account. The comment was a book recommendation I had for her, she posted on her hashtag BDHbookshelf and I thought I’d take a chance and comment a book recommendation I had for her, and the chance paid off.

I cannot wait to see what the future holds with Bryce, she has been such an inspiration to me for the past few years, and she promotes such wonderful causes and body positivity! I hope to one day meet her and thank her in person for changing my life for the better, and I think I’ve come up with the perfect opportunity to meet her- Iz and I have decided to travel up to London for the Jurassic World Dominion premiere in 2022 (if Covid lets us!), we’d get a hotel and actually meet Bryce in person, as well as meeting other members of the online family!

Words cannot fully contain the admiration that I possess for Bryce, her soul is utterly and truly exquisite, she has been such a visionary while I’ve been transitioning from a girl who had no idea who she was with no dreams or aspirations, to a woman who has now found so many new friends and now knows who she wants to be.  

[axther]

the devil’s train

bakugou x reader x oc: the devil’s train (yandere) in which Bakugou and Gil, the reader’s best friends, show that they care for her far more than as a friend. for @tspice283​ tw blood, fighting, stalking, general yandere behaviour

YN LN led a very uneventful life.

She went to U.A. and had several close friends. She was told she had a bright future when it came to her hero career and was often described as friendly. She was relatively confident in herself and knew how to fight.  But she wasn’t ready for this. 

Before her were her two best friends; Bakugou Katsuki and Gil Keating. It was dark out, dark and cold in an unfamiliar place. They were growling and barking like dogs, clawing at each other with blood on their hands. YN was lost, horribly and terribly lost in her mind and on the pavement. There was blood everywhere, splattering against the wall and on the ground. They were drooling like madmen, disgusting, revolting, and making YN want to throw up. 

Ah...but maybe she should go back to the beginning.

YN always walked to school with Gil. 

It was something of a tradition. They were childhood friends, born in the same town and growing up with each other. Gil was tall, much taller than YN, with dark, green eyes that seemed to bear into YN’s very soul. His hair was white, snowy white, and YN wasn’t actually sure if it was natural. He was almost feminine, had it not been for his strong personality, it would’ve been easy to confuse him with a woman. He was a bit of a flirt to be honest, but YN didn’t mind. He was kind to her, and that was what mattered. Gil’s quirk was Stasis, temporarily stopping time. It was only for a few seconds at the moment, but he could do enough damage in sparring that even Aizawa recognised his efforts. To YN, he was pure fluff with a side of angst that she only ever saw when he fought others. On that day in particular, he was humming a song under his breath about some sort of strawberry snake, rocking on his heels while walking and being happier than usual. YN wasn’t sure why, but she certainly wasn’t going to question his good mood, considering he was usually quiet on their walks. “So!!” YN chirped, skipping a bit. “Do you wanna go somewhere after school, or something? It’s been a while since we’ve done something that’s just the two of us.”  Gil lit up, a bigger smile gracing his face as he leaned down and wrapped an arm around YN. “Of course! We could go to the arcade, or maybe to the mall, or that new boba tea shop that opened up! Oh! Or we could do all three! I’ll pay,” He winked, strangely giddy. “That sounds great, actually!” YN looked up at him, then back to the sidewalk with a happy flush. “Aww, you’re blushing!” Gil nuzzled the top of YN’s head in an intimate gesture, chuckling. “That’s so cute!” “Shush,” YN pouted, smacking his arm softly in an effort to stop him from mussing her hair. “Fine, fine.” Gil pulled away, but kept his arm over her shoulder. YN didn’t think much of it, realising that they were quickly approaching the school. She saw Ochako and Tsuyu both walking towards the door, and she broke from Gil's arm to rush towards them. Behind her, Gil's smile plummeted as he watched her leave. His eyes seemed to flash for a second, a dark colour that would send shivers down anyone’s spine. It was like an unreigned desire inside him that slowly spilled out until YN turned back to him. It disappeared almost instantly, another smile coming upon his face. “Hm? Is something the matter?”   “Nothing, nothing!” He waved a hand, still smiling brightly. YN hummed, shrugging her shoulders and walking through the doors with the other girls and leaving Gil to walk in by himself. His eyes darkened again, going blank and almost hollow as he shuffled along. YN didn’t notice how he became almost a shell behind her, chatting happily with Ochako and Tsuyu. Momo and Jirou soon caught up, talking about their weekend and filling the silence with pretty talk. “Hey, YN!” Ochako chirped, linking her elbow with YN’s and Momo’s. “We’ve got sparring again today! Who do you think you’re gonna be paired up with?” “Oh…” YN mused, placing her finger on her chin. “I’m not sure! Last week I had...Midoriya? So maybe I’ll get Bakugou this time.” At the mention of Bakugou, all the girls glanced over to see the blonde standing a few feet away. He was bright red and had just jumped like a spooked cat, hair spiking up and the flush on his face overtaking his neck and ears. YN tilted her head curiously, and the other girls laughed.  “What was that about, Bakugou!?” Ochako yelled over her laughter, holding her stomach. Momo and YN were the only ones nice enough to hold back their laughter, but even then, it was strained. “Shut the fuck up!” Bakugou barked, going from cat to dog and back to cat again, slinking away past the corner of the hall. The giggling died down, before Momo raised an eyebrow. “What was that about, really?” She murmured, looking almost concerned. “That was really strange.” “Maybe he’s just having an off day,” Ochako shrugged, linking arms proudly with YN and smiling. “Or maybe he has a crush! Ha! Imagine the day!”

  YN laughed too. But sometimes, foreshadowing is obvious.  The day passed quickly and quite uneventfully, with clouds crawling over the sky and slowly darkening. There were several times where rumours of multi-class sparring being cancelled, but Aizawa dispelled them and often told them that as heroes, they would have to work in the rain anyway. But he took mercy on them, and decided to start sparring early so they didn’t get soaked. He chalked it up to he himself not wanting to get wet, but everyone knew that he just wanted to make sure they didn’t get sick. When everyone filed out, Gil made a beeline to YN’s side with a big, sheepish smile. “Hi~” He trailed out, winking playfully. “I missed you! 1-B is boring without my bestie.” “You flatter me,” She smiled, rolling her eyes but letting him recline on her.  “It’s true! Tetsutetsu and all the others are cute and all, but you’re my number one.” “That’s cute.” “C’mon!! Don’t just brush me off!” “Alright.” Aizawa’s tone cut through their conversation, and for a second, Gil glowered at the teacher. Aizawa didn’t seem to notice, though, and let it go as he started listing pairs. Oddly enough, Bakugou wasn’t set with YN; instead, Tsuyu was saddled with him, and YN missed the way that Bakugou’s eyes trailed over her as he walked past. Aizawa instructed Gil and YN together, and Gil glanced down at her. “Ladies first.” YN walked past him, not replying but simply going into their designated row so they could spar, next to Bakugou and Tsuyu. Aizawa announced for them to begin, and slowly, the clouds gathered above them. YN assumed a more defensive stance after seeing Gil whale on his own classmates before, but strangely enough, he simply stood there with his hands in his pockets. “Dude,” YN hissed. “What are you doing? Hit me.” “Nah.” Gil took a hand out to check his nails, nonchalant. “What?!” YN was whispering, trying to not catch Aizawa’s attention, but felt confusion. “Why not?!” “Don’t wanna.” “That’s so stupid! C’mon! I can take it.” “I don’t want to hurt you.” “What?” YN lowered her fists, jaw dropping. “Are you serious? Why?” “Uh, it’s sort of self-explanatory.”   “No, it’s not!” As they bickered quietly, neither of them noticed Bakugou losing his attention from sparring, and looking at the two of them. He wasn’t even fighting Tsuyu anymore, just watching them with a deathly blank stare. It was like she didn’t even know he was there. Bakugou was a confusing creature. He was incredibly contradictory, saying one thing but meaning another. He tended to keep to himself, but wanted nothing more than to have friends and be loved. Who didn’t? What human could live without love? Oh. And speaking of love, he loved her. He first met YN LN when he was in kindergarten. She was gentle and sweet, but strong and not scared to talk back. Despite the fact that quirks were so….segmenting at such a young age, she seemed to pay no attention to it. She didn’t talk to many unless they spoke to her first, or if she had to. She kept to herself, politely. That was the first time he noticed her, and he supposed that’s where it all started. The second time, he had just gotten admitted into U.A. He recognised YN almost immediately, which was strange, considering he hadn’t seen her in over ten years. But it was like she hadn’t truly changed, just grew up with a certain grace about her. She had matured, and she was beautiful. He started deteriorating, in a word. Everything he did was in hopes of her seeing him, really seeing him for who he was. He knew he wasn’t perfect, but who else would be worthy of her? He had to be the greatest to ever come close, so he crushed everyone in his way to get there.  But then the fucking slimy, disgusting, filthy, destructive, sweaty, obscene, vile, vulgar, dirty man came along and dared sully YN’s lovely glow. Gil was, in many ways, like Bakugou. He aimed for the top, and stopped at nothing to get what he wanted. He was the one thing standing in his way for YN, and Bakugou would tolerate nothing in his way. He had come too far. He had done too much, watching YN walk home to keep her safe and taking her shirts from the line so he had some semblance of her in his room. Taking pictures so that way their kids can see her as she was, beautifully natural and unaware. Bakugou had boarded the devil’s train to love a long time ago. And he had no intention of getting off.

He had come so far. And here Gil was, refusing to fight YN. Out of what? Love? 

Something in Bakugou snapped. He rushed over to Gil, picking him by the collar and growling at the precipice of all his pent up, bubbling rage. His hand already started cramping from holding on so tight, fingers going red. “You-! You, you, you, you-!” Words escaped Bakugou in his pure rage. Thunder started rumbling across the class as everyone slowly stopped sparring and started watching Bakugou threaten a very nonplussed Gil. “Me. Yes. What do you want?” Gil raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms and letting Bakugou carry all of his weight. “You fucker! You know what you’re doing!” “Do I?” Gil smirked, and quite suddenly, Bakugou, really truly, realised that Gil knew what he was doing. He looked over to YN, who was in a mix of confusion and anger.  Bakugou felt the colour draining out of his face, realising that YN must’ve thought that he was flying off the handle for no reason. But how would he explain that the love of his life was being manipulated by some smooth-talking bastard? “Go on,” Gil grinned wolfishly. “Get mad. I dare you.” “You…” Bakugou was panting when the first drop of rain hit him, trickling down the back of his neck and into his shirt. Several students looked up, eyes wide as the rain slowly started coming down. Gil and Bakugou were in a stalemate, hanging onto whatever thread of disguise they had about YN. “Bakugou.” Aizawa’s voice was quiet, stern in the growing storm. “Let go of him.” Bakugou dropped Gil, throwing him into the ground. Gil just kept his shit-eating grin, and Bakugou soon realised why; YN rushed towards him, immediately fussing over him and prodding at his collar. Jealousy flushed through Bakugou, but what could he do? He had created this. He created this monster that stood between him and YN. Between him and euphoria. Bakugou was pulled away by Aizawa, who kept a strong grip on him despite Bakugou’s lack of resistance. He kept giving Gil a deadly glare, and Gil stared right on back.

It was war. 

Bakugou waited outside of 1-B once he got out of class.

Of course, he wasn’t sure if or when they would leave, but he knew that Gil was not going to just let the incident go. No, he knew that the evening was going to be a great equaliser. One man would walk away victorious, and the other would be left either licking his wounds, or dead. Bakugou was ready for whatever would happen, but to him, there was only one way the day was going to end; with him being the sole victor for YN’s heart. YN’s love. Bakugou sighed, a flush growing on his face at the thought of being YN’s boyfriend. He’d never let her go, of course, considering all he had done to get to the position he was in now. He would bite and spit and fight anything that got in his way. And the last obstacle was right in front of him. “Done with your little freakout, Kaachan?” Gil may have towered over Bakugou, but the smug look on his face made Bakugou’s gut crawl.  “I’m gonna beat your fuckin’ face in.” Bakugou snarled, gritting his teeth. “And I know you wanna smash mine in. C’mon. We’ll settle this.” “As you wish~” Gil teased, walking two steps behind Bakugou as they left the school and began walking down the ever-darkening streets. The rain had cleared for the moment, but the forecast said it’d come back within the hour. How strange. A final showdown between enemies in the rain and darkness. It felt almost divine. Bakugou turned down a dark alleyway, not wanting anyone to see the bloodbath. The last thing he needed was pictures or rumours surfacing once he was a hero, once it mattered. “So.” Gil stopped at the very edge of the path, hands in his pockets. “How do you want to settle this? Like a brute by fighting?” “Like men.” Bakugou turned, jumpy at any movement Gil made. Gil scoffed. “Perhaps we could go our separate ways and whoever gets YN to love him wins.”  “What? Scared?” Gil's eyes lowered in a glower, and Bakugou felt a shiver down his spine. The young man suddenly felt cold, calculating and not at all like YN’s childhood best friend. “No.” Gil never broke eye contact with Bakugou. “I know that in terms of quirks, yours is more violent and prone to harm than mine. But I could dodge you until you’re exhausted and run dry. It would be a constant back and forth that would achieve nothing.” “It might not. But at least you know your place.” Bakugou stuffed his hands in his pockets just like Gil, and it felt like a stalemate. “Are we gonna do this, or not?” “Fine.” Gil sighed, rolling his head back in a relenting manner. “Like dogs.” Bakugou pulled his hands out, his own nervous sweat already providing enough nitroglycerin to start the fight. Every cell in his body was on fire, elated at the fact that he could finally pummel Gil into a pulp and prove to YN that he was nothing but a manipulating bastard that wanted to sully her. “Finally-!” Bakugou growled, feeling as though he had already won as he rushed forward to strike Gil. “It’s over.” Before Bakugou could hit Gil, though, he disappeared, and Bakugou felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end at the feeling of someone behind him. A hand started reaching for the back of his neck, but Bakugou twisted around to swat at Gil's arm before he could attack. Gil disappeared again, and Bakugou realised that he was right; it would just be an endless back and forth before one of them got tired. But Bakugou was willing to take that risk. He had seen Gil's quirk in action before; it drained him quickly enough, given that they all sparred in ten-minute increments. Stasis was more of a technical quirk, and Bakugou could use that to his advantage.

He spun around, gritting his teeth and aiming for Gil's stupid face again and that shit-eating grin that haunted his dreams. There was another disappearance, another swing, and it was like a pendulum: where Bakugou swung, Gil would disappear. It was a dance, above all, and a lethal one. Bakugou saw Gil starting to wheeze, and spun his elbow back to sock him in the stomach. Gil barely dodged it, but not with his quirk, instead choosing to side-step, and Bakugou knew he had him on the ropes. It was a sweet victory on the tip of his tongue, and he was just about to make contact when-

“What the fuck is going on?” 

Both men froze when they heard that oh-so-beautiful voice, shock seeping into everyone’s system. The two turned slowly, seeing YN with a look of angry shock on her face. She had a clear umbrella, and the two realised that it had started raining again during their fight. “Uh.” Gil cleared his throat, glancing to the side then back again. “Hello.” “Answer me.” YN’s voice was stern and cold. “What the absolute fuck is going on?” “Nothing.” Both of them answered at once, snapping their arms to their sides in a desperate attempt to seem normal. “Just sparring, babe, it’s noth-” “Babe?” Bakugou felt the shock absolutely drain out of him and rage take its place. “Babe?!” “Ita, I know you’re lyin-” “So?” Gil cut YN off, eyes flashing again. “Do you have a problem?” “Yes! I do!” Bakugou yapped, feeling his hair go on end again. “Are either of you listening-oh my fucking god!” Bakugou didn’t hesitate to absolutely launch his fist into Gil's face for the most satisfying punch of his life. Gil's nose caved in and blood immediately started coming out, pooling onto the pavement. Gil took a second to register that he was even hit before he retaliated, slapping Bakugou’s arm away and promptly socking him in the stomach. YN let out a surprised yelp, dropping her umbrella in shock and getting knocked over by Bakugou trying to dodge another one of Gil's hits. They were fighting, resorting to biting and frothing at the mouth like rabid animals. Bakugou hadn’t felt this level of pure anger ever in his life, and killing seemed like such an easy task against Gil. YN was the only thing that kept him going, his last motivation to even live or succeed. He felt that if he didn’t prove himself, if he didn’t make Gil stand down, then it was for nothing. It didn’t matter that YN was trying to pry them off of each other, swearing bitterly in her confusion, or that Gil was bleeding profusely. Bakugou didn’t care that his hands were covered in Gil’s blood and his own. Nothing mattered anymore but winning. 

Bakugou had boarded the devil’s train of love. And he couldn’t get off. 

[sunflowersoonyoung]

imperfection | eunha

w.c ↠ 2.0k

pairing ↠ eunha x fem!reader

genre/s ↠ fluff, high school au!, featuring best friend!yerin

description ↠ You have spent countless hours observing perfect student Jung Eunbi. But it’s not enough. You want to see what lies beneath the surface.

warning/s ↠ possible underaged drinking (it’s kinda ambiguous as their ages aren’t mentioned)

author’s note ↠ my first piece of writing for this blog! woo~! i have noticed a severe lack of gfriend fics on this site so hopefully i shall stay committed enough to fill that hole :3

-

"You’re staring at her again.”

Yerin had her fingers wrapped tightly around your forearm, dragging you back to reality with a lilted tone. Her crescent eyes were crinkled, filled with amusement. It was not the first time she had commented on that particular tendency of yours, one that would be near-impossible for you to give up.

Jung Eunbi’s seat was two from the front, on the far right. You had that fact engraved into your mind. From your place near the back of the classroom, you could freely view the side of her features; you could lose yourself in her, commit to memory her subconscious habits.

Yerin sat back in her chair, reflecting back to you a mischievous smile, her thoughts as enigmatic as ever to you.

Ever since your friendship had blossomed in early middle school, Yerin had acted almost as a guardian to you. That role had remained despite both of you being almost adults. Although, recently it had taken on a new flavour. She was a little concerned that you were missing something - or rather, someone - in your life, and had been giving you small nudges towards finding that someone.

“I know she’s pretty but it won’t rub off on us,” she teased, seemingly unaware that her beauty was comparable to Eunbi’s. It was only due to her tomboyish and brash nature that male students were too nervous to approach her, whereas Eunbi was famously regarded to be sweet and polite.

“That’s not what I’m hoping for,” you muttered, taking care to be quiet enough that Yerin did not hear you.

Rather, your true wish was to capture a glimpse of Eunbi’s inner workings. Although you had spent over two years observing the school jewel, much of what you witnessed was only surface deep. You only wanted to know her deeper.

It all had begun when the round-faced girl had raised her hand to answer every question during orientation. Her chestnut irises would glitter, her enthusiasm to start the school year shining through.

That day you found yourself enraptured. You were not alone, either; boys flocked to Eunbi, drowning her with flattery and grasping for any scraps of affection from her. They reminded you of starved animals. Perhaps you might act like that if you were in a similar position, with the confidence that you had somewhat of a chance with her.

You had long since crossed that idea from your mind. Initially, you enjoyed clinging to the fantasy. Nowadays, however, that small sliver of hope stung, so you tried to stifle it.

“Then, what are you hoping for? I’m curious.”

Shock washed over your skin as you realised Yerin had, in fact, overheard you earlier. You met her firm gaze reluctantly, noticing the way heat rose on your face. You had not revealed your sexuality to Yerin but knew very well she had suspicions. It was only natural; not once had you offered your attention to a boy.

Just as pressure was building for you to reply, the bell sounded. You leapt upon this opportunity, hastily tidying your desk as you knew Yerin would be more eager to head home than pursue this topic. You were correct in this assertion. Immediately she abandoned her interrogation to stuff her pack with her notebooks.

Another time, you thought with passing relief, you would save that conversation for later.

-

The gradual walk home with Yerin came paired with a lukewarm breeze. She usually overwhelmed your ears with chatter, but today her mouth remained closed. A comfortable silence draped the air.

Abruptly, she spoke.

“There’s a party tonight. I know you don’t like them, but I thought I’d invite you anyway. I heard Kim Mingyu is going,” a broad grin stretched across her full cheeks as if the knowledge of the school flirt attending was thrilling to you. You could think of nothing worse than ending up pressed to a wall, enduring the wrath of a tipsy boy deadset on peeling off your clothes.

Feeling like an evening out regardless of potential consequences, you heaved a sigh and responded, “I’ll go. What time?”

Yerin clasped your arm tightly, offering you a giddy smile as her eyes lit up, “really? I’ll pick you up! Is eight o’clock okay?” It was rare that you joined Yerin on her drunken antics, and her excitement was bubbling up on her expression.

Before you could respond affirmatively, she was already skipping ahead, far more animated than moments earlier - when she had seemed almost subdued.

“Make sure you wear something cute,” she hummed, turning on her heel to face you with interlocked fingers held at her chest. Dread began to weigh down your gut like a heavy stone; usually, you would come to regret these evenings out.

But it was too late to change your mind. Yerin was far too overjoyed, and even the thought of extinguishing that burned you with guilt.

-

The night air was stuffy, and after only a few moments of exposure, sweat was sticking your clothing to your figure. Hardly heeding Yerin’s advice to dress in something “cute”, you had put no effort in your appearance, attending in only jeans and a tucked-in shirt. Upon scrutinizing this outfit, Yerin had only frowned.

Compared to your friend, you felt significantly underdressed. Her lustrous hair cascaded down her back in waves, a short baby blue dress revealing the ivory gloss of her legs. She was bound to receive attention tonight, and so would you - unfortunately not the positive sort. Standing beside such a gorgeous girl would surely cast shadows upon you.

Inside, the proximity of bodies overwhelmed you with nausea and shortness of breath. If it were not for Yerin’s hand enclosed around yours, you would have directly avoided the mass for the outskirts of the room. Instead, you ended up amidst all of the chaos, thanks to her iron grasp.

Yerin had filled a cup with liquor-laced cola and busied herself with casual conversation, leaving you to observe your surroundings out of boredom. The lounge room had been modified somewhat, fold-out tables squeezed into corners, lined with alcoholic beverages and a variety of soft drinks. As you took in the room, your gaze settled upon a crimson leather sofa - empty, save for a petite girl curled up on the end.

It took you a brief moment to realise the aforementioned girl was none other than Jung Eunbi.

“Yerin,” you hissed, drawing her attention, “what is she doing here?”

As if this was all a part of some diabolical plan of hers, she shot you a grin, responding with a dismissive, “who knows?”

Eunbi had never shown her face at a party before, perhaps out of fear of smearing her good-girl image. She looked horribly out of place, nervously glancing around her as if worried that someone might approach her. Her fingers would intermittently adjust the collar of her white blouse, then return to swirling the contents of her plastic cup.

By the time you recognised that you were staring unashamedly at her, Eunbi was staring back.

Initially, you grew panic-filled, searching for something else to look at as if it were mere coincidence that you had met eyes. It was too late to pretend; you had now drawn her attention.

Feeling hot and embarrassed beneath her curiosity, it took enormous willpower not to turn your back on her. Instead, you allowed the tension between you both to heighten, until you flicked your gaze back up at her. It was her who went scarlet this time. If you had not just witnessed it, you might not have believed it.

The evening melted away, much of it spent exchanging shy glances and nervous smiles with Eunbi. Occasionally she would stand and refill her cup, and these were the only interruptions, apart from when Yerin (who was now quite intoxicated) stumbled backwards into you, causing the world you and Eunbi shared to shatter briefly. The tension between you both was obvious.

As the night reached its culmination, she stood, this time making a direct bee-line for the doorway you had witnessed various couples disappear through. Her steps were unsteady, and she appeared less than confident in her ability to walk.

As her figure retreated from your vision, cold hands grasped your shoulders from behind.

“Go on. I think she wants you to follow her.”

It was Yerin, giving you the shove you needed. You would thank her later when she would remember it.

Although most rooms were undoubtedly occupied, the study remained open; this is where Eunbi had found herself. Her palm leant against a dark wooden desk, back turned to you as her almond-shaped eyes skimmed the bookshelves. She was not truly looking at them, however, her mind far elsewhere. She turned hearing the sound of your footsteps coming to a halt, expression brightening in the wake of you.

“You’re (F/n), the pretty girl in my class, aren’t you?”

Nothing could have prepared you for a compliment so direct, a blush heating the tips of your ears. Eunbi had an air of innocence as she spoke, perhaps due to the alcohol in her bloodstream. Her teeth sunk into her bottom lip as she proceeded, and you could not help but look.

“Hey, (F/n), will you listen to me while I talk?”

Though you hardly needed to be asked, the way her voice trembled would have convinced you regardless. Her eyes glistened with tears as she began to describe her situation, opening up to you with such desperation that you realised she had no one else.

You learned that Seonghwa, a popular boy with questionable motives, had been pursuing Eunbi and that despite her obvious disinterest her friend group was pushing her in his direction. Uncovering her imperfections somehow made her more attractive.

“I’m too scared to say anything. They already make fun of me because I only focus on my studies. But I don’t want to date him, I really don’t,” as she began to sob, shock coursed through your veins. Out of desperation, your hands found hers. She took this contact as permission to bury herself in your arms.

It was strange, how natural it felt to hold her. You were frightened to hug her too tightly, her figure small and fragile. She did not share the same fear apparently, because she was clinging to you as if she had been craving this moment forever. You allowed her to cry, tightening your embrace in an attempt to soothe her. It seemed to work; gradually, her quivering slowed till she was still.

Somehow, this was happening. All you had ever desired was to be the very person who Eunbi took solace in, and this night had lead to just that. Her easiness in trusting you made you realise, perhaps this romance was not as one-sided as you had always assumed.

When she withdrew, her raven hair falling over her face in disarray, you were cold without her. Would this be the last of a breathtaking moment? Your heart threatened to break over the mere idea.

“I’d much rather date you, (F/n). I like you a lot,” she murmured, as if unsure whether she was ready for you to hear it.

You heard it regardless of her intentions.

Time passed amidst a thick silence, as neither of you could find the right words to say. You were not sure where the inspiration to kiss her came from, an abnormally bold move from yourself by your admittance, but Eunbi’s warm lips were inviting you to continue so you did.

Her fingers reached up and tentatively brushed your cheeks, gently tilting your jaw to draw you a little closer. She left a sweet flavour behind, and when she peered at you her round eyes sparkled with a clarity you would have expected from someone sober. It was all you could do not to sweep her up and kiss her till her lips were swollen.

For a moment you peered back at each other almost in disbelief.

“Do you think we could try being together?” Eunbi’s voice shrunk, barely audible.

This time you failed to fight your urges, cupping her face to taste her once more, a wordless answer to her question.

[hs-devote]

20. E N D G A M E

Moodboard // Content // Masterlist

Disclaimer:

All characters and situation in this story are fictitious. Resemblance to any person living or dead is only God knows. Previous chapter;

"And it will be better for us, to help us to move on with each other's lives."

Move on with each other's lives.

Was that what she wanted?

20. ENDGAME

“How's him, Niall?”

“He's .. he's getting worse.”

“What do you mean?”

“I don't even feel him anymore.” . . . .

It had been months since Y/N decided to take proper rest to help her syndrome. At the first few months, she was overwhelmed by her poor brain performance. She had almost burnt her kitchen because she forgot how to turn off the stove all of a sudden. One day, she even forgot where her apartment was after going out for grocery shopping. The poor woman was anxious, making her cry in the middle of the street. Luckily for her, her neighbour found her and drove her home.

Her parents were worried, of course. They both were agreed to Y/N to came back home in Swansea,  for them were easier to look after her. After all, she had no one in London anymore.

During that time too, she underwent routine treatments to restore her condition. From drugs to a few therapies. To this day, her condition was better, although sometimes she still got light headaches.

If her health had improved, her heart wasn't completely healed.

No matter how hard she tried to forget her broken relationship, especially him, she couldn't. Harry was too beautiful to be forgotten. Despite what happened last time, she couldn't lie even if her tongue said another.

She remembered the last time, really last time, when she met him in his penthouse to pick up her things. Y/N indeed hadn't lived with Harry yet, but since she often stayed at his place, he suggested her to bring some her things to his penthouse.

He looked skinnier, and his face looked tired. From what she heard from Suzanne, Harry's loss of appetite made him lost weight. Plus, time-consuming work also made him forget to rest. Y/N had scolded at him for refusing to eat his lunch at that time, and made her had to force her ex-boyfriend to eat even a little.

But Harry was Harry.

He would eat if she also had lunch with him. She refused at first, yet because she felt bad with Suzanne who had made the food, then she finally agreed. On the other hand, she was a bit sad that their lunch at that time was so different. If usually they would have a conversation, for the first time, only the sound of plates and cutlery between them.

Harry.

Harry.

She missed him very much.

The two of them no longer in touch after that. She still had his number, but did he?

She didn't know.

Nevertheless, he sent her a flower bouquet for her twenty-fourth birthday. She remembered very well what Harry wrote on the card. A simple birthday wishing. Yet, he didn't call her nor text her.

Well, what did she expect?

They broke up.

She was the one who broke their relationship first.

She was the one who told him to move on.

Why was she still yearning for him?

Because Y/N broke them when she was falling in love for the first time.

Did she regret it?

Y/N couldn't answer that. . . . .

Y/N just returned home after buying food for her fish. Yes, she had two goldfish to keep her company if she got bored. Her eyes caught an unfamiliar car parked in front of her house, a quite expensive car for the neighbourhood where she lived.

Shrugged it off, she ignored her thoughts and immediately went in. In the living room, she saw her brother was talking to a woman. Was this his girlfriend? But, he didn't say anything.

When she was about to say hello to them, her smile faded as she recognised the lady who had been sitting back facing her.

“Clementia?”

“Hi..” Clementia shyly waved her hand, smiling softly. Y/N averted her gaze to Connor, raising an eyebrow – asking for some explanation. How did he know Harry's sister?

“She comes looking for you,” he shrugged, “Well, I'll leave you two.” then leaving both the girls alone.

“How are you, Y/N?” Clementia asked her once she took a vacant seat available, “It's been too long.”

“I'm fine, Ce. You?”

“Good.”

She nodded, “What are you doing here?”

“Err..” Clementia bit her lip, tucking a strand of her hair behind her ear. Looking confused to answer Y/N question.

“We need your help.”

Y/N arched an eyebrow, “What kind of help?”

Something must gone wrong. There was no way Clementia had come all the way here asking for something unimportant. She wouldn't ditch her school in Italy and come to Swansea for only meeting her and having a casual conversation. Or, maybe she was on her semester break?

“It's Harry.”

“Harry?”

“Yes,” Clementia sighed, “You're our only hope, Y/N. Just like Niall told me.”

What did Niall say to Clementia? What actually happened?

"I... I don't understand," Y/N laughed nervously, "We're not a relationship anymore if you don't know."

“I know. But– ”

“Harry's condition is worrying, Y/N.”

Her head snapped to the where the voice came. There, Niall was standing at her door, with his arrival that she didn't know. Since when he was there?

“I'm sorry I just come,” Niall spoke, “Traffic was quite shit today.”

While Clementia just rolled her eyes, Y/N stared at Niall anxiously. What did he mean by that? Did Harry have an accident?

“What do you mean, Niall?” she asked quietly.

“Harry.. has been so stressed lately. Making him lost control of his emotions. He seemed not to care about his life anymore, and that makes Marcel take the opportunity.”

Y/N's eyes widened the time Niall said Marcel. He was sitting next to Clementia, how could he slip like that?

“I already know Harry's condition and who is Marcel.” Clementia spoke to answer her thought.

“And your mother?”

"She knows too. That's why she didn't come here, have to set an eye to him." Clementia nodded, "It broke my heart that Harry has such a hard life. It's not his fault that he.. he grew another personality that eats him alive."

“What exactly happened to him?” Y/N questioned after a minuted passed in silence. Hearing Marcel's name, made her shudder a little. It had been so long since she had heard Marcel and Harry's name pronounced in one sentence.

Marcel.

How was he?

"Marcel is the one who lives in Harry's body as we speak now. Harry is getting weaker, and hasn't been able to come back with us for more than a month." Niall rubbed his face, "We're afraid that... Harry will gone.”

Her heart felt like being electrocuted when she heard that. Marcel took over Harry's body, and her ex-boyfriend had no strength to fight him. And it had been going for a month. A month.

A month, Harry never came back to his place.

And he didn't care anymore.

Why?

“No way,” she chuckled incredulously, “The last time I met him, he said that Marcel refused to show up.”

“It's because he took his time,” Niall answered, “He saved his energy and knocked Harry out when he was weak.”

“And why couldn't Harry fight him? Why didn't he care?” Y/N bombarded him questions, “Harry should be strong enough. He has no more burden because Erskine was back to normal.”

“It's you, Y/N.” Clementia squeaked.

Y/N pointed her finger dumbfounded to her chest, “Me?”

"My brother is very sad and depressed with your break up," Clementia murmured, "He thought too much of your separation to make him forget about his health, and he feels guilty for failing to protect you from the incident with your head."

It was because of her..

Y/N speechless.

She didn't think this would all be bad for his condition. She didn't know Harry would take it too seriously.

“Has Marcel done anything... bad?" she asked carefully. She wasn't sure if Clementia also knew what crimes Marcel had committed. Her feelings worsened when Niall looked confused to answer while Clementia just lowered her head and leaned back.

“He killed Dale.” . . . .

Returning to London was quite nice. For a long time she left this city, made her miss some places.  Y/N would stay for two days in London, and since she was agreed to help the Styles family, she would try to talk to Harry, or Marcel.

She couldn't refuse their request, especially Anne also called her and begged her to meet her son – hoping that Harry would listen to him, even though he was deep in his subconscious.

One more fact she wanted to know, why Marcel killed Dale?

That disgusting human had already rotten in jail, why did he have to get his hands dirty – again?

Despite her worries, she was a bit happy to meet him despite this difficult situation.

Back to set foot on his building, pulling her to play back the memories of her and Harry. She remembered when they were pretty drunk, and luckily only his penthouse was on that floor, they were making out all the way to his home. Moaning out loud in the hallway, stumbling in the dim light as Harry tried to unlock his door. It was midnight, and there was only two of them there. And the rest, their scattered clothes on the floor being the silent witnesses.

Her cheeks became hot just to think about it.

Harry.. Oh, fuck..

She was startled when the door in front of her being opened, showing Anne who smiled kindly at her.

Since when had she gotten to Harry's floor and rang the bell?

Anne brought her body to her warm embrace, “Hi, darling. How are you?”

“I'm good, Anne.” Y/N smiled fondly.

“You must be tired of the long journey. Where's Niall? You should have come with him right?"

Niall?

“Yeah, yeah. I'm here.” An Irish voice came from behind her.

How could she forget that she came here with Niall?

Y/N laughed at her stupidity inwardly.

Harry's penthouse was quite quiet. She didn't see Suzanne, only Clementia who was busy on the stove. Anne kindly poured them a drink before sitting down with them. Her happy face now turned sadder than before.

"Thank you for coming, Y/N. It means a lot for us." Anne smiled apologetically, "I'm sorry if it bothers you. I don't know anyone else to ask for help."

"It's okay, Anne. I understand." Y/N gave her a small smile, "How's him?”

“He's still.. Marcel.” Anne carefully answered, “I don't see Harry in him. He isn't annoying as before, but it still different.”

“Has he done anything all this time?”

“Besides.. killed Dale?” Anne whispered, “Not really. He was just been awful, a bit rude, but he wasn't physically abusive.”

Anne knew Marcel killed Dale.. “But, still. We don't know next.” Niall murmured, “We have to be careful and not make him angry.”

“He wouldn't lay off  his hand at a female." then, Y/N stared at Niall, "But, I agree with Niall."

Suddenly, they flinched when they heard a scattering loud from Harry's bedroom. When Y/N looked at Anne, the old lady just closed her eyes and rubbed her face while Niall swiftly getting up from the couch.

“I'll prepare his medicine, and shot– just in case.”

“Can I see him, Anne?" she spoke quietly. Anne just nodded and warned her to be careful. Giving Harry's mother reassuring smile, she brought her leg to his bedroom.

She wasn't too surprised to find broken glass scattered near the door. She entered slowly and found Marcel staring at his laptop screen. The man didn't seem to have noticed her presence yet. After gathering courage, Y/N stepped closer to him.

“Marcel.”

Hearing her voice, Marcel averted his gaze towards her. His forehead creased in surprise, looking at the woman who hadn't he saw for months. He shrugged, shaking his head unbothered.

“What are you doing here?”

His voice was surprisingly calm. Yet, Y/N still had to be careful. He was Marcel after all, not her Harry.

“Didn't you miss me, huh?” she tested the water, she even didn't know if Marcel wanted her presence let alone miss her. She couldn't straight to the point asking why he threw Harry's favourite mug, why Harry didn't bother to back in his body, and why he killed Marcel.

“Wrong person, Y/N. Harry was the one who suffered because he missed you, a lot.” Marcel snickered, “Poor Harry was so fragile about love, pathetic.”

“Marcel, I didn't come here to fight with you.” Y/N sighed, “I just want to.. talk with you. Like a friend?”

Her last sentence was more a question to herself, because she wasn't even sure.. they were friends. She sighed heavily when Marcel still unbothered, and with careful steps, she walked closer to him.

“Why are you so selfish like this, Marcel? You took the opportunity when Harry was weak and control his body at will. You must remember, Harry is a part of you. You're nothing if it's not because of him."

“You know nothing, my darling.” Marcel shook his head, lifting his head up to stare at the girl who was looking at his dark irises. “When Harry had given up on his life, I couldn't let him leave it all. If Harry didn't want to stay and I didn't act fast, this body would be lifeless. He would be sleeping, so would I. And then, what?”

She didn't mishear that, did she? Why Harry gave up on his life? He still had so much more in his life, why did he think like that?

“Why?” she murmured, “What caused him to think that way?”

“You.”

Y/N widened her eyes, “Me?”

“Like what I just said. He was so desperate. He feels like everything is wasted if you're not with him anymore.” he rolled his eyes, “He was very hurt because he loves you very much.”

He was drowning on his own love..

"And you didn't try to persuade him?" she changed the topic. Y/N couldn't keep hearing Harry who was sounded unable to move on and be the most hurt. She was hurt too, but she realised the reality that had slapped her sweet dream.

“Believe me, Y/N. Despite I'm satisfied with this opportunity, I also miss my dark corner.” Marcel  worked his jaw, “Being him is not easy.”

“Fine,” Y/N whispered, “Then, why did you kill Dale Jespersen?”

“One of the reasons he was tired of everything was also because I killed Dale," Marcel put the laptop away, going to the chair facing the window. His fingers rubbed his chin while staring at Y/N who was still standing next to the bed.

“Dale Jespersen appeared all of sudden and blocked Harry's car one night. Your ex-boyfriend just came back from the office and was so shocked. How could someone who was supposed to be in a prison roam freely at night? Long story short, that prick bribed the officers there to release him that night, only to meet Harry. And of course, for revenge."

Y/N shook her head in disbelief, “How could that be?”

“He said something offensive and... he was gone.” he gave her innocence look, “Don't think about how I got rid of him. Be glad Harry didn't end up in prison.”

“But your family know!” she cried, “How fucked up was that?”

“Yes, they do. But the world doesn't. Good thing Harry has money and connections so I can use that. After all, Dale was alone on his own self in this earth. Why was he still in this world."

“I can't.. with you, Marcel.” she pinched her forehead, “I just.. I just don't know the way you're thinking.”

“Then, why are you here?” he scoffed, “If you're trying to call him, good luck then. Because if you don't hurry, you'll lose him.”

Grunted irritably, Y/N got up from her spot and left Marcel who still seemed not care about her. However, she was sure Harry still could her and felt her presence despite he didn't want to reveal himself.

“I know you're there, H. Please come back. Don't be scared. I'm here, and we'll be alright.”

And that was all she said before leaving him alone. Letting the words crawling inside his mind and soul. . . . . Y/N had no luck talking to Marcel. Not her fault, but it looked like Harry indeed had given up. Yet, she was also wondering if he could feel her presence that day. Didn't he want to meet her?

She also stayed longer in London than she planned. Her parents didn't mind, but Connor was the one who scolded her on the phone. Her brother knew why she went to London, and he didn't like that. He didn't like the idea of her sister help the man who made her cry for days after their broke up despite he didn't know why exactly they broke up. He just knew that things couldn't work between them so she decided to back off. He didn't know which one was wrong. But, one thing he knew, he would do anything to protect Y/N, no matter what.

Anne insisted her to stay at Harry's penthouse at first, but she remembered the circumstance, so she understood when Y/N refused gently.

The girl stayed at a hotel that Anne booked for her for another week, and she was very grateful and making a mental note to pay Anne's kindness someday.

That night, Y/N was trying to find a new job because she thought her condition had improved. She was also thinking about trying to apply for a postgraduate scholarship if she couldn't find any job. There were several vacancies on the internet that made her interested.

It was one in the midnight and she had to get her things ready as she would get back to Swansea tomorrow. After closing her laptop, she quickly packed her things and got to bed early because her train would leave in the morning. But, when she was about to brush her teeth, her mobile phone rang a few times. She frowned when seeing Niall's name on the screen.

“Hello, Niall?” she said softly, her palm closed her yawning mouth. Her eyes, which were heavy with sleepiness, suddenly opened up widely after hearing Niall's panicked voice at the end of the call.

“You're joking, aren't you?” Y/N didn't know if she was screaming or not. It was clear that her tone was quite high and she realised that. Her hands suddenly sweating, making her almost drop her mobile phone.

The last thing she knew, she sprinted to grab her jacket and hurried out of her hotel room.

. . . . Here, everything was so quiet. Y/N heard almost nothing but the beeping machine. Her heavy eyes grew heavier because of the tears that flowed when Anne hugged her while sobbing violently earlier. She had never seen Anne so frail and sad before, and that made her heart ache even more.

Her sleepiness disappeared at the second Niall called her and giving her the news that sucked her life out.

Harry was involved in a car crash and in critical condition.

Niall didn't give the full chronology. As far as she knew from him, Harry drove off the track and his car was hit from behind before hitting the divider. Also, he was drunk while driving.

Now, the man was lying unconscious with wires connected between his body and the machine beside his bed. A few scratches on his face didn't make any better. The bandage wrapped around his head reminded her when she had the same one back then.

The doctor said, if Harry would get through his critical condition tonight, he would probably survive. If he wouldn't, Y/N couldn't imagine what would happen.

If Y/N now was sitting beside Harry's bed and watching every inch of this man in front of her. His family was outside giving her time to see her ex-boyfriend.

She slowly took Harry's free hand and hold it tight. Her wistful eyes stared straight at him who still sleeping soundlessly. Smiling sadly, she could still sense the confused and panicked feeling ran through her body when she was leaving her hotel room and rushed to meet Niall who was waiting for her in the lobby.

The poor man got a slap from her when she thought he was lying and joking around. But, when he said it with a serious face, almost screaming at her, Y/N knew Niall wasn't joking. She felt that was real when he grabbed her hand quickly and pushed her into his car. They didn't have much time. Niall was driving fast, with her still dumbfounded. She felt even more dumbfounded when she realised she just wore shorts and a baggy shirt. But her jacket was likely saved her from such an inappropriate clothing choice.

“You can do it, H.” whispered her, taking his hand to rub her cheek, “Get better, please.”

Y/N knew everyone wouldn't sleep tonight waiting for him to go through his critical moment. It was almost four in the morning, only a few hours until the doctor could say that he was successful and she couldn't wait for it.

“I feel bad that I'm the one who sitting here and not your mother. But, that's okay. Anne should take a rest, as well as your family." she hummed, her eyes constantly glancing at the machine displaying the rhythm of his heartbeat.

Normal..

“I haven't told you that I like the flowers. The one that you sent me on my birthday. They were beautiful, H.”

“I also sent you a sunglasses for your birthday. Did you like it? Because I heard no words from you.” she sighed, “I know it's not Gucci but I think it suits you.”

Y/N chuckled slightly, looking at his bare fingers. “They removed your rings? Or, you didn't wear any?

“Why were you driving drunkenly, H? You told me once that you avoid that it as much as possible." she frowned, "Was it Marcel? I–"

Weird.

She heard a strange sound.

Her eyes stared at Harry who was still unconscious. Then, who made that sound? It was just both of them there.

Suddenly, the colour on her face was drained out like she just realised something. No, she didn't want to say that. She didn't want to lift her head or averted her gaze. Her vision still fixated on Harry who looked so calm in his deep sleep.

No...

No way.

Y/N flicked her head to where the machine was, only finding that his heartbeat was flat line.

Flat.

No rising or falling charts.

Like before.

No.

“No!”

The chair she was sitting on, fell backwards when she stood up and immediately grabbed Harry's shoulders, shaking him as hard as possible.

“Harry? Harry! Harry, please!”

Her finger quickly pressed the emergency button and again tried to wake him who she knew was impossible. Her mind was chaotic, it felt like her brain was paralyzed to digest everything, her hands were shaking and sweaty and so cold. She hed never panicked and feared this much.

“Harry..”

Her voice was shaking, head began to feel dizzy. Her eyes began to blur because of the tears that were ready to flood, and repeatedly stared at the machine and Harry's face back and forth.

The line was still flat.

And Harry still had no movement.

She couldn't help it. Finally, she let the tears fell down her face. Sobbing violently, her inner goddess was cursing the doctor who hadn't come yet.

“Harry, please. Wake up! Don't do this!" she whispered, stroking his face which still felt warm under her fingertips.

Why were they taking so long!?

She choked in a sob, "Harry, please. Please. We're not doing this!"

“Don't die on me, please!" screamed her in agony. She couldn't bear the thought she lost him. She didn't want to lose him. Not now, not later, not ever.

“H,” she cried, holding Harry's head and stroking his hair softly. “No, please. Don't – don't.. leave me. I – I can't.. lose – lose you. Please.”

“I'm so – sorry that .. that I haven't – haven't said that. I forgive you, H.”

“I'm sorry – sorry for.. everything. You're – you're not... the only one was – was wrong." she cried harder, "I shouldn't – shouldn't … given up on you."

She shook her head, didn't want to accept the reality that had happened. Harry couldn't die. He wouldn't.

“Harry, please.” she once again shook his limp body. The sound of the machine that had been her nightmare now was filling her head, it got louder and louder and made her nauseous. They were still flat, and Y/N didn't know how long it had been.

“Don't leave me, Harry. Don't leave your mother, your sister. And everyone who loves you.” she stammered, eyes squeezed tightly.

With shaking shoulder, Y/N stroked his jaw and brought her mouth closer to his ear, "I love you, don't do this to me, please. We still have so much together. I love you, H.."

She flinched when the door opened suddenly and a nurse tugged her gently so the doctor could check on him. She couldn't hear what they were telling her. All she knew, the next second she got out from the room with tears flowing profusely and body shaking. From her blurry vision, she could see Clementia and Niall approaching her. She shook her head, was speechless and head was spinning and ears ringing badly. The last thing she felt, her body fell to the floor. . . . .

Two years later.

Y/N's tasks that day almost made her head explode, plus her co-worker being uncooperative doubled her irritation. She knew, working in an international financial institution had its perks. Her previous job was nothing compared to now. Not that she underestimated them all, yet this was the first time she felt her energy and mind really drained out. Moreover, she would likely to travel to Washington D.C to attend conferences, a lot.

“Yes, yes. Send them all to me by tomorrow afternoon. Thanks, Bobby!” Y/N gave her co-worker thumb out before waltzed out from the meeting room, heading to her office.

“Tough day, Y/N?” Sienna wiggled her eyes, teasing Y/N who just entered the break room to grab a drink first. Y/N just nodded, filling up her tumbler with mineral water.

“Everyone almost gets my nerves today," she murmured, "Plus, I just landed from New York last night and the jetlag was a nightmare. I couldn't sleep during the flight and my eyes wouldn't let me rest."

“Lucky for you, it's Friday! And, I think your fiance won't mind to help you to get relax for the rest of weekend." Sienna winked her eyes, "Don't be so tense, Y/N!" and leaving Y/N alone with a bursting laugh.

Y/N shook her head, leaving the break room unoccupied since she had a lot to do and must be finished today. When she got her office, she found a bouquet of her favourite flowers with her favourite chocolate bar. Chuckled giddily, she closed the door behind her and walked closer to her desk. Her manicured fingers picked up the card laid on top his desk, her eyes immediately recognised the familiar handwriting.

Hard day? I hope you love the flowers and enjoy the chocolate bar. I know you're on a dairy diet but nothing is better than seeing you happy.

Ps: I made a reservation at the Royal Lancaster tonight, 8 p.m sharp. Your darling fiance

Fiance.

He always knew how to made her smile even at any time. Smiling softly, Y/N grabbed the flowers and smelt them before putting at the vase. Her hand then took the chocolate while turning on her computer,  but when she saw the ring on her fourth finger on her left hand, her memory pulled her back when he popped the question.

They were in Switzerland for Christmas holiday. It was when the Christmas morning, and was snowing heavily. She had just made them hot chocolate since they stayed at the Bernese Alps and the cold was crazy, and he told her it was the time to open their presents. At that time, she didn't have the clue if the proposal being her present.

When he pulled the red box out and slid it open, her eyes fixated to the ring sat on the cushion. It was the Cartier platinum ring paved with diamonds cut. That shiny and beautiful thing caught her attention, ignored him who knelt in front of her. When Y/N just realised it, she quickly jolted and gasped – closing her gaping mouth. Even though he proposed her with simple words, she knew that her man was nervous as hell because his hands were shaking while holding the ring.

With an ugly sob, Y/N nodded meekly and said yes to his proposal.

What a beautiful moment.

She chuckled lightly and then returning to her work, excited to get them done as she couldn't wait to meet him. Five days in New York made her missed her fiance so much.

Later that evening, Y/N succeed to have her task done by 6. She hurriedly shut down her computer and took her things to immediately meet her fiance who was waiting in the parking lot, even made Sienna teased her in such a haste. Her smile grew bigger after spotting a silver Porsche in the VIP section. Wasting no time, she jogged to the car and opened the door.

“Hello, there.”

“Hi,” she waved at him and get in, “I'm sorry for taking to long.”

“Looks like you did have a hard day."

Y/N hummed, closing the door and putting the safety belt. Then, she turned her head to him and grabbed his neck to land a kiss on his plump lips. The fiance himself happily savouring her lips like it was the only antidote in the universe. The kiss only lasted for a few seconds before she pulled back, grinning at him. "Thank you for the flowers and chocolate. I love it."

He chuckled, wiping her wet lips affectionately, “Glad to hear that. Shall we go now?”

“Sure.”

She leaned back to the seat as the car moving down to the street, sighed happily because she finally could relax after a full day of stress plus the lacking of sleep.

“Is there anything special that you take me out for fancy dinner tonight?” asked her while looking at her fiance. A little smile formed on her lips while caught her fiance was so focused behind the steering wheel.

“Eh, no. Why?” he asked back, throwing her a quick glance.

She shrugged, “I'm wondering. I mean.. it's not saturday night.”

He chuckled, “Is it a crime that I take my fiancee to have a dinner not on saturday night?”

“Heyy..”

“Little birdie told me that you pissed all day long. So, I think a nice dinner will cheer you up.”

“How thoughtful of you.” she grinned, “Thank you, though.”

“I'm doing my best.”

If her fiance hadn't realised yet, Y/N kept her eyes on him all the journey. She found that the way he drove was so endearing. Especially when he was biting his lips or licked them while waiting for the red light. While his right hand remained on the wheel, his left hand never left her grasp unless he had to shift the gear.

“Why did you keep staring at me?” he questioned, even though they had been together for a long time, but such a small gesture still made him nervous.

“Why do I find a man is so attractive when he's driving,” she whispered, “Especially you.”

“Don't start, darling. We're in the middle of street right now.”

“I'm not.” she widened her eyes, “Do you think I was.. teasing you?”

“Obviously,” he snickered, “If not, you wouldn't squeeze your thighs together, darling.”

How obvious he did know that?

“We don't want to be late because I fucked you at the gas station over there, do we?” he smirked, “We just have forty-five minutes to get there.”

“Challenge accepted. We both know you can finish me in twenty minutes anyway, H.” . . . .

Harry felt numb.

The second he opened his eyes, the lights blinded his eyes and made him wonder if he was in heaven. Yet, he breathed in relieved when his gaze sharpened and he heard the beeping machine beside him. His suspicion strengthened when he lifted his hand and finding an IV stuck in his hand.

He was in a hospital.

And he was survived.

Then, the door bursting open quietly made him turned his head, looking at Anne who just entered with a shocked face. A relief radiated from the eyes of the woman who gave birth to him.

“Mum?”

His throat was sore along with hoarse voice, but he made it clear that he was fine by flashing his mother a small smile.

“Oh, Harry.” Anne mewled, stepping closer to her son, “You're awake.” and peppering kiss on his cheek.

“I am.”

“How do you feel? You're pretty banged up.” Anne stroked his unruly hair while sitting on the chair beside his bed.

“My body hurts, but it's okay. I'm fine.”

Anne gave him apologetically smile, “Okay, then. I'll call the doctors so they can check your condition.”

Harry was checked up not long after that. The doctor said he had improved and could go home within a week. He was being told that he was lucky because the car crash was quite fatal yet he had no serious injuries, jut a few stitches on the temples. But, he was quite surprised when Anne said that he had lost his heartbeat for a while.

He didn't know how long he had been asleep. The last time he was awake when Clementia was out for lunch and left him alone in the room. He loved to sleep, but he hated the pain hammering his head when he just woke up.

“Fuck.” he mumbled while touching his bandaged head.

“Is it hurt? Do I need to call the doctor?”

He never snapped his head that fast, was surprised to hear the voice he missed so much. He felt he was hallucinating when he saw Y/N looking at him worriedly.

“Y/N?”

“Hi, Harry.” she said timidly, “How are you feeling?”

“Hi.”

Harry didn't know how to feel. He was happy, but on the other hand, he also confused. During Y/N talked to him, he couldn't focus. Not only his head still feel dizzy, he felt like he was high on drugs. Everything felt like floating.

“I'm sorry it took me almost lost you to realise how wrong I was.” Y/N fumbled her fingers, “I'm too late to say I've forgiven you.”

“It's okay, Y/N. I understand.” Harry exhaled, “It's not your fault alone.”

“Why were you driving drunk?” seeing the hesitant on his eyes, Y/N felt bad and changed the topic, “It's okay if you don't want to talk about it. I just.. worried.”

“Marcel was drunk, and took the opportunity to have one night stand with a striptease dancer there. I couldn't let it happen. So, I tried to take over and quickly left." he sighed, "Even it was him who was drunk, I would also get drunk when I got over the body."

“And why would you choose to take over?”

“Because I don't want to disappoint you, Y/N.” he admitted while looking through at her eyes, “I knew if.. if that happened, you would hate me even more.”

“Harry.." Y/N whispered, "If.. if that really happened, it wasn't your fault. It was Marcel. Even though you and him are one, you both are still different and I have to understand that. Not all his fault should I blame on you. If I can understand you, I should be able to understand him too."

“It's impossible, Y/N. No one would accept a disorder like me.”

“You're not a disorder, Harry. You're just different and special... "

“... If I can love you, I have to love him too.”

It caught him off guard.

Did he hear correctly?

He didn't mishear, did he?

Y/N smiled softly seeing Harry who looked dumbfounded, staring at her like she just grew an antler. Then, she grabbed his free hand and rubbed his knuckle, "I'm sorry for the long waiting. I'm sorry it took me almost losing you to realise that I love you."

“When did you first know?” his voice was barely audible, he couldn't believe his voice to speak. It was more like his soul spoke for him.

“I always knew.”

Harry laughed, and laughed. Until a single tear rolled down his lids. He was never this happy, he could never be this relieved. His love wasn't unrequited. He loved her, and she loved him.

His free hand brought her face closer to him, landing a short kiss on his love lips. She grinned widely and kissed him back.

“I love you," he spoke quietly and rubbing their nose together, "Very much."

“I love you, too much.” and she kissed his jaw.

“Harry?" she pulled back, "Why did you give up? Why didn't you care about your life at that time? Your family was worried sick.”

Harry's shoulder slumped back, “I was.. I was so depressed because.. I thought you didn't want me around anymore. I felt helpless, I thought my life has no meaning anymore. That's why I don't want to face the truth.”

“And thinking it was the best if Marcel was present?” she shook her head, “You have more right to this life, H.”

“Honestly, I wanted to wait. I didn't care if the wait would cost a million years. But, the wait was worth it because I'm in love.”

Y/N never saw this vulnerable side on him, and it was surprised her. She never thought someone like him, was so fragile yet tough at the same time. She smiled at him while rubbing his cheek.

“How's Marcel?" asked her carefully. She was quite curious about Marcel because he was the master of Harry's body lately. What did he feel, for now?

“I don't know.”

“What do you mean?”

“I don't feel his presence anymore. He's not weakened, though.”

“He's just.. not there?”

“He's gone.”

. . THE END What did you think?

[kitten-noire]

Love Letters

Summary

"Hey, girl! You won't believe the news I have for you!"

Marinette inwardly groaned. Maybe not, then.

She sat up and gave Alya a small smile. "What's up?"

"Well, you know that big scoop I was-" Alya stopped suddenly and looked at their desk. "What's that?"

Marinette looked to where her best friend was pointing. There was a letter on the desk, with a single rose on top. How did she miss that?

She put the rose aside and opened the letter.

Based on a prompt from the MF Discord server

Read on Ao3!

@miraculousfanworks

@discoveringmiraculouswriters

Ladybug jumped from rooftop to rooftop, looking for the akuma of the day. She checked her yoyo for Chat Noir's location, only to find that he was only a few minutes behind her.

"Why, hello, M'lady," Chat greeted as he landed next to her.

"No time for games, Minou," she chided. "We need to defeat this akuma fast. If I show up late at school again, I'll get into real trouble." Her reputation for tardiness did not exactly help matters.

"Then let's get to it, shall we, M'lady?"

Ladybug nodded and together, they raced above the rooftops, looking for the akuma.

"Miraculous Ladybug!" Ladybug exclaimed as the magical ladybugs roamed over the city, restoring everything back to its former glory.

"Great job today, Bugaboo," Chat comments when he notices her walking over to him. He had been comforting the akuma victim while Ladybug was restoring the city. "We make a pawsome team, don't you think?"

"Oh please, Chat," Ladybug scoffed as the victim walked away. "Today's akuma was way too easy."

Chat started to reply, when suddenly, her Miraculous beeped its warning sound. Ladybug instinctively put her hand over one of her earrings and sighed.

"While I love bantering like this with you, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to cut it short. Handle the press?"

"Of course, M'lady," Chat replied as he bowed, took her hand and kissed it.

"Flirt," Ladybug playfully scoffed. "Until next time, Kitty!"

____________________________________________

Ladybug landed in an alley a little ways from the school and detransformed. She hoped she had some of Tikki's cookies with her since she didn't remember packing them this morning.

"Phew!" Tikki sighed. "I'm glad you were able to easily defeat the akuma today, Marinette."

"Yeah, I think Chat's right about being a good team. I mean, we've always been a good team, but recently, it's like we've been getting stronger."

"Yes, well, the longer you have the Miraculous, the stronger you become."

"Yeah, I guess that-" Marinette was cut off by a sound from deeper in the alley. Tikki quickly flies into her purse for the purpose of staying hidden.

She heard a voice softly whisper something and she suddenly saw a bright green light in the dim alley. Before she could register in her mind that it was actually Chat Noir detransforming, she found herself staring into her detransformed partner's eyes.

"A-adrien?!"

____________________________________________

Adrien stared wide-eyed at Marinette, who stared right back.

This was not good.

Ladybug was going to kill him.

"Um, Mari, listen-"

"You're Chat Noir?!"

"Don't scream it aloud! Listen, you can't tell anyone about this. Ugh, Ladybug's gonna kill me."

Marinette stayed quiet and stared dumbfoundedly at Adrien. She couldn't believe it. The love of her life was also her partner.

Who she kept rejecting for him.

How stupid could they be?

Adrien pulled her out of her thoughts. "Mari, let's just go to school for now. We can talk about this later."

Since she couldn't find her voice right now, Marinette simply nodded and together, they headed to school.

____________________________________________

Marinette and Adrien stopped at the door to their classroom. Since they were delayed by the identity reveal, they arrived at school at a much later time than they should have. Now they were contemplating entering the classroom or not.

Marinette really considered just booking it.

"Um," Adrien started as he rubbed the back of his neck. A nervous tic, she supposed.

Now that she thought about it, she probably has seen Chat Noir do the same thing.

Adrien's voice pulled her out of her thoughts. "You can go in first, Mari."

"Um, yeah. Okay."

As soon as they entered the classroom, the teacher paused teaching her lesson and glared at the two students.

"Monsieur Agreste, Mademoiselle Dupain-Cheng, I do hope you two have a legitimate reason as to why you arrived this late to my lesson."

"Um, yes," Adrien started. "The, uh, the akuma attack. We got trapped while trying to run away from it."

"I hope that next time this happens, you will make sure you are a safe distance away from the akumas. You may take your seats and turn to page 107 of your textbooks."

The two kids nodded and they quickly sat down in their seats.

"So?" Alya whispered once Marinette was settled in her seat. "Trapped together, you say?"

"Shut up!" Marinette whisper-yelled. "Nothing happened."

Her best friend dropped the subject as the teacher looked at them accusedly.

____________________________________________

Marinette sighed as she closed her locker. She had had a pretty long day and all she wanted to do once she got home was to take a long nap.

"Hey, Mari," a male voice called from behind her. She turned around and saw Adrien leaning against the locker.

"Um, hey! Up what's? I mean, what's up?" She knew her partner's secret identity, yet she still couldn't talk to him properly.

Could someone just end her?

"About… what you saw earlier, you really can't tell anyone about this. It's a huge mistake and it wasn't supposed to happen but it did and-"

"Hey, Adrien," Marinette softly said as she put her hand on his upper arm. "It's okay. I won't tell anyone anything. Don't worry."

"Really?" At her nod, Adrien sighed in relief. "Thank you so much, Marinette." He hugged her out of pure relief while Marinette felt like combusting on the spot. Didn't this boy know what he was doing to her?

"Okay," he said once he let go of her, "I have to go to fencing now, but, uh, we'll talk later?"

"Yeah! Yeah, later."

He waved at her with a smile and left the locker room.

She sighed as she took the last of her books and made her way to the front of the school, where she met up with Alya. Together, they walked home, with Alya teasing her about arriving late to class with Adrien.

____________________________________________

Chat jumped from rooftop to rooftop as he patrolled the city. It was his turn this evening, as it seemed that Ladybug was too busy with school to patrol tonight.

Chat immediately offered to patrol in her stead since he didn't have much schoolwork to do. He needed the fresh air anyways.

He didn't really know where he was going, just letting his body lead the way while letting his thoughts run around his mind.

He was thinking about Marinette in particular.

He knew she wouldn't tell anyone his secret identity. He knew that much about her. Maybe her knowing about it wasn't that bad. After all, she was one of his closest friends.

If he hadn't loved Ladybug first, he would've probably fallen for her.

Before he knew it, Adrien found himself on a rooftop across from Marinette's house. He contemplated visiting her.

He sighed. He didn't think that would work. Now that she knew his identity, she would act the same way around his superhero persona as she acted around his civilian form.

He was about to carry on with his patrol when he saw a small, red… thing flying around in Marinette's room. It seemed it was trying to calm Marinette down since she was pacing around her room and rambling her mouth off.

He squinted. He recognised that little red creature. It was…

His eyes widened and he took out his baton and headed straight home.

____________________________________________

"Plagg, this is amazing! The love of my life is one of my closest friends!"

"Well, it was about time."

"What do you mean by that?" Adrien asked as he sat up on his bed. His eyes widened."Wait, you knew?"

"Well, yeah," Plagg shrugged. "But it's not like I could tell you. You two had to find out by yourselves.

"I suppose that makes sense. I just can't believe it."

Marinette was Ladybug. Ladybug was Marinette.

His "just a friend" Marinette was the love of his life.

His smile dropped. Did Marinette even like Adrien? After all, she did keep rejecting him for the man that she loved. That could mean that she still didn't like him, even though she knew about his identity.

"Plagg? Do you think Marinette will ever like me? On both sides of the mask? I mean, she always stutters around me and basically tries to avoid me at all costs. And she's always rejected me for that crush."

"Kid, just stick to cheese. It's way less complicated than all this love stuff you keep talking about.

"Why did I think you'd help?"

Adrien sighed, laid back on his bed and stared up at the plain ceiling. His lady would never fall for him.

He slowly grinned. Unless…

He got up from his bed and went to his desk with some paper and a pen.

____________________________________________

Marinette yawned as she entered the classroom. She stayed up so late because of Chat Noir's identity and homework and so much other stuff. If she had it her way, she would sleep for the rest of the month.

She got to her desk and immediately put her head in her arms. Maybe she could get some sleep in before class started.

"Hey, girl! You won't believe the news I have for you!"

Marinette inwardly groaned. Maybe not, then.

She sat up and gave Alya a small smile. "What's up?"

"Well, you know that big scoop I was-" Alya stopped suddenly and looked at their desk. "What's that?"

Marinette looked to where her best friend was pointing. There was a letter on the desk, with a single rose on top. How did she miss that?

She put the rose aside and opened the letter.

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.

I love thee to the depth and breadth and height

My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight

For the ends of Being and Ideal Grace.

I love thee to the level of everyday's

Most quiet need, by sun and candlelight.

I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;

I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise;

I love thee with the passion put to use

In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith;

I love thee with a love I seemed to lose

With my lost saints,—I love thee with the breath,

Smiles, tears, of all my life!—and, if God choose,

I shall but love thee better after death.

"Who left this here?" Marinette asked after she finished reading the letter.

"I don't know. What, you have a secret admirer or something?" Alya asked as she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively.

"No!" Marinette replied defiantly. "It's just, uh-"

"Just what?"

"Oh, would you look at that? Class is about to start. I need to go to my locker. You know, get my books for the day and stuff. See ya later!" She quickly stood up and bolted from the room.

"Uh, okay, then."

____________________________________________

"Who could have sent me that love letter? Mark my words, when I find out, I'm gonna give them a piece of my mind."

"Calm down, Marinette," Tikki said. "You shouldn't be angry or else you'll get akumatized."

"Yeah, Bugaboo. Listen to your kwami."

She turned around at Adrien's voice and gasped.

"Bugaboo? How do you- You-you knew?"

"Found out last night."

"You little-"

"Calm down, Bug. I won't tell anyone." She didn't know whether to punch that shit-eating grin off or to kiss it off.

"You better not," Marinette replied. Adrien laughed and they both headed to class.

____________________________________________

Marinette should've known he wouldn't stop.

She kept finding love letters in the oddest of places. Her sketchbook, her backpack, even in her bedroom.

She did not want to know how he pulled that off.

She really should've known better. And everytime she looked around the room, she would find his stupid grin on his stupidly handsome face.

He was lucky she loved him, or else she would've bashed his head in a long time ago.

She sighed as she walked into the locker room with Alya. She was honestly surprised that no one had found out that it was Adrien giving her those love letters. She swore he grinned everytime she groaned at whatever sappy thing he wrote. Someone should've noticed by now.

"Girl, you look like you haven't been getting a lot of sleep. What's up?"

"Oh, you know," Marinette started, "Designing, homework, the usual." She opened her locker to collect her books.

"Yeah, but-" her best friend cut herself off as they both watched a pile of love letters swarming out of her locker.

"Wow, girl. That's a lot of love letters. Watch out, Adrien might get jealous."

"The thing is, they're all from Adrien, Alya. I can't get him to stop. Believe it or not, I don't want him to."

"Girl, tell me everything."

____________________________________________

"Good evening, M'lady," Chat greeted as Ladybug landed next to him. "How are you feline?"

"I don't know, Chat, but it's not a good feeling," Ladybug grumbled. "Those love letters you keep giving me are certainly part of why I’m acting this way."

"Oh, come on, Bug. Don't tell me you're tired of hearing of my undying love for you."

"Chat, you know-"

"Ladybug! Chat Noir! Give me your Miraculous!"

"This conversation is gonna have to wait, Minou. We have an akuma to fight."

____________________________________________

Marinette groaned as she saw another love letter on her desk. As always, with a single rose on top.

"Wait, girl, I thought you loved the fact that Adrien kept giving you love letters."

"I do. It's just- it's a lot sometimes, you know?"

She went to sit down at her desk and opened the letter.

"You know what? That's it! Come here, Adrien!"

She didn't wait for his response as she took his hand and led them to the locker room.

"You know, you didn't have to drag me all the way here. I have feet and I know how to use them."

"Shut up, you tomcat!"

He shut up.

"Why do you keep giving me these love letters?"

"Well, I-"

"Don't answer that!"

"Okay…"

"Do you know how crazy this has been driving me? I can't sleep at night because of your stupid love letters. How did you even manage to leave one in my bedroom?! You know what, don't answer that too. Adrien, I love you, but this is really stressing me out."

Her mind registered what she said at the end and she covered her mouth.

"You… love me?"

"Yes," she sighed. She figured it was about time she told him about her feelings. "I have loved you since you gave me your umbrella."

"So you’ve loved me this whole time?"

She nodded.

Adrien grinned. "So… you kept rejecting me… for me."

"And you kept saying we were just friends when I was actually the love of your life."

"We're so stupid," they said simultaneously. They looked at each other and laughed.

"Well, Mari," Adrien started when they started to calm down. "I was trying to show you that I loved you, but we were speaking two different languages. Now that I know who you are, I’m trying to speak your language."

"You're such a romantic," she scoffed.

"I know," Adrien said with a grin.

We'll, we're here now, and that's what matters. Know that I'll always love you." She reached up on her tiptoes and kissed his cheek.

"Now, let's get out of here before Alya comes to her own conclusions about why we're taking so long," Marinette said as she grabbed Adrien's hand.

Despite the staggering amount of love letters she had from him, she decided that she wouldn't have wanted this to happen any other way.

[elefics]

torment / chapter 4

word count: 3.4k

The week after the ball, I heard nothing from Michael. Not seeing him tied my stomach in knots.

It took me a while to realise this was what missing him felt like. It was more intense than anything else I’d felt for a boy before.

I’d had boyfriends, if you could call them that. In high school, I’d had two brief flings with two boys who didn’t know how to be boyfriends (not that I was very good at any of it either, but I knew they weren’t doing it right). It felt funny to put Michael in the same train of thought as high school boyfriends. We’d spoken a handful of times, but the connection I felt to him was different. It was a pull in my core, like my soul was reaching out of my body. I knew there was more to him. I knew I’d barely scratched the surface.

One morning, Cordelia stopped me by the stairs. There was an urgency in her eyes.

“Lyla,” she grabbed my arm tight in her grip. “I need to ask you something, and I need you to answer truthfully.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat, nodding slowly.

“That boy you were with, the warlock, at breakfast. What do you think of him?” She asked.

The wind was knocked out of me. I focused on breathing evenly and keeping myself upright as my hands shook against the banister. I brought all my energy to my core, envisioning blue, calm light there. I closed my eyes, and when I opened them again, I was totally serene. Cordelia blinked, waiting for me to answer.

“He seems nice. A little quiet, reserved. Why? What’s wrong?” I asked measuredly.

She twisted her lips. “I can’t place it. That morning, I had a vision. Something bad – something evil, overwhelmingly so, is coming. I felt it when I looked at him.” Her voice shook. I saw a flicker of fear in our matriarch, and it was only then that I felt something might be…off about Michael.  

“What did you see?” I asked.

“Death. Decay. So much terror and heartache and darkness. I can’t explain it. I didn’t know where else to turn…” Cordelia trailed off.

“What do you mean by that? Cordelia, what happened?” I urged.

“You must be Lyla. I’ve heard a lot about you, and this boy Michael.” An old voice rang out from the top of the stairs.

I recognised the flaming red hair first. Myrtle Snow.

She was meant to be dead. I’d only ever seen her in paintings and pictures. According to Cordelia, she was one of the best women the Academy had ever seen. She was kind, strong, intelligent. Cordelia often teared up by the fireplace when she recounted stories about Myrtle. Seeing her here, in the flesh, with Cordelia trembling beside me, I knew something was wrong. Cordelia would never have brought her back if she wasn’t at her wit’s end. How had I not known? How had we all missed this?

“Myrtle Snow.” Her red glove extended towards me. I shook her hand and smiled weakly.

“Cordelia, dear, I believe we have an appointment.” Myrtle said, looping her arm through our Supreme’s.

Today, Cordelia was off to visit the warlocks, along with Zoe and Myrtle. She had been busier in the last two weeks than she had all year – diplomacy was her priority right now. I could tell she still had her reservations; over dinner, she’d stare into her wine glass for minutes without blinking, churning over the events of the day. She often went off to meetings and wouldn’t be back until after dark. She was up to something, or maybe she suspected someone else was.

I couldn’t stop thinking about Michael, and Cordelia’s questions about him. He was a boy. A warlock, and apparently a powerful one, but as far as I’d seen, he was just…a boy. What could they want with him?

“Girls! Come down here, immediately!” Cordelia yelled. I jumped from my chair, taking the steps two at a time to see what was wrong.

Two new faces stood beside Cordelia. I recognised them immediately, just like I had Myrtle. I’d seen them in photo albums around the house, but had never met them myself – Madison and Queenie.

“My girls. My beautiful, beautiful girls. Your sisters are home.” Cordelia cried. Myrtle squeezed her hand reassuringly.

A few other girls had congregated at the bottom of the stairs. It was like seeing a ghost. One thought ricocheted around the room like a bullet: How?

“Someone make some tea. We have much to discuss.” Myrtle commanded.

That day, over half empty cups, Cordelia told us everything.

That beautiful boy, the one I’d danced with all night at the ball and who’d adorned my neck with diamonds, was more powerful than he let on. My very first thought was, I should have taken what Jerome said on board. Was it a warning? A message?

“Michael brought our girls back. While grateful, I simply can’t see how he could be the next Supreme. Warlocks have never, ever claimed this title. As far as anybody knows, it’s impossible.” Cordelia mused. Several witches nodded enthusiastically.

“He gives me the creeps. Something about him isn’t right.” Olivia, a witch a few years younger than me, said. Her nose wrinkled in disgust. I clenched my jaw defensively.

“I just can’t see it. I went to the ball with him. He seems so…normal.” I spoke up, surprising even myself.

Every pair of eyes in the room swivelled to face me.

“What’s he like, then?” Olivia sneered.

“Quiet. That’s all.” I said, looking into the bottom of my cup.

“He doesn’t seem so bad. He was at our table, seemed like a decent guy…and he saved our sisters.” Penny spoke up.

I was flooded with gratitude, which I’m sure she felt, as she shot a smile my way. At least I didn’t look crazy on my own.

“That may be so. Regardless, I want you all to be more alert. Because tonight, we’re going to the Hawthorne school. Michael is to perform the seven wonders.”

A gasp ripped through the girls.

“I haven’t even had a chance yet! That’s not fair!” Olivia whined.

Cordelia smiled tightly, “This title is a burden, Olivia. You should be glad you’re not in the spotlight tonight,” She sighed. “I am not happy about it. But if this boy is as powerful as the warlocks say he is, I cannot stand in the way of the coven.” She squeezed both the returned witches’ knees affectionately.

“Be ready by dark. Look presentable.” Myrtle ordered finally.

---

The day, and all its confusing revelations, exhausted me. I fell asleep in my clothes at three in the afternoon. I dreamt of Michael, as usual. This time, he was grabbing my hand, pulling me further and further into the rolling green fields beside the Academy, running – I couldn’t tell if it was away from or towards something.

“Lyla. Lyla, wake up. Lyla-”

Sweat slicked my forehead when I jolted awake. My room was empty and drenched in golden light. I sighed heavily, squeezing my eyes shut and open again.

Like a mirage, Michael stood in the yard outside my window. I blinked to make sure I wasn’t still dreaming. He smiled, and without a word exchanged between us I was hurrying down the stairs. Most girls were too busy with study to notice. I slipped out the back door like a ghost.

“Hi.” He greeted me, reaching out for my hand. My skin buzzed at his touch. He immediately led me away from the house, into the field like in my dream. He smiled, but kept his gaze fixed on the horizon.

I wasn’t used to this kind of contact with Michael – his thumb drawing soft, unconscious lines across the back of my hand. He seemed completely at ease.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

“Somewhere quiet. Away from them.” He cast his eyes back towards the looming shadows of the Academy.

I kept quiet the rest of the way. Instead of talking, I drank him in. I felt like an addict, clinging to any scrap of Michael available to me. His black combat boots crunched against the dry grass. He donned faded black jeans and a black tee shirt, a departure from the more formal attire I’d seen him in. I admired the smooth golden skin of his upper arms, and the freckle near his elbow. The chain I loved so much was hanging across his chest. I bit my lip and tried to keep my thoughts quiet, locking them tightly in a box inside me. I hoped it was enough to stop him overhearing.

Eventually, we came to a tall tree with just enough shade for the two of us. Michael sat down cross-legged and waited for me to do the same. Our knees touched, and neither of us moved away.

“What’s with all the secrecy?” I whispered.

“First of all, I heard you earlier. You called me normal.” He fake pouted.

“Well, they certainly don’t seem to think so,” I sighed. “Why?”

“It’s complicated.” He picked at the grass, scattering blades in the breeze.

“Everything’s complicated with you, huh.” I looked at up him. Every time I thought I was starting to get to know him, another wall went up between us.

He smiled, taking my hand into his. He played with my fingertips gently, traced the lines across my knuckles. “You have no idea.”

“So, the seven wonders test. Everyone’s losing their minds in there.” I laughed. Personally, I didn’t give a shit if the Supreme was a witch or a warlock. But I hated the idea of losing Cordelia…and I didn’t want to fathom that that might be the cost of Michael’s success.

“Will you be there?” He asked softly, looking up at me. His baby blue eyes looked so vulnerable, so innocent. He needed me, whether he’d admit it or not.

My heart swelled in my chest as I nodded. “Of course.”

He leaned closer, our noses half an inch away from each other. “Can I kiss you?” He breathed.

“You’ve never asked before.” I whispered. My heart was in my throat.

“This is different. For good luck. Can I kiss you?” He repeated.

I kissed him before he could ask again. This was different to his kisses at the ball – before it was lust, now it was…something else. He kissed me like I was air, like he needed me to survive. His lips fought mine hungrily, moving closer until my back was against the solid tree. His hand cradled the side of my face, tangling into the base of my ponytail. Pinned there, tight against his body, Michael made me forget anything existed at all.

---

The sun was setting by the time I slipped back into the house. Leaning against the front door, my head spun like a coin. I was dizzy with bliss – kissing Michael was how it was supposed to feel, I was certain.

He’d had gone a different route, avoiding the house all together. While the witches were on high alert, we had to keep things quiet. He peppered my face with kisses on that last corner, before he turned right and I continued. I still felt their warmth.

“Where have you been?” Zoe asked, eyeing me suspiciously.

“For a walk.” I’d never been good at lying, but I shocked myself at how easily it rolled off my tongue. I had a feeling spending time with Michael was going to make me a very, very good liar.

“Car’s ready.” She shrugged, leaving the front door open for the remaining girls.

The Hawthorne School didn’t look as nice as Robichaux’s from the outside, but the inside was dark and lush. Wine-red lounges sat on cool cement floors, and every wall was lined with old books. Cordelia and Myrtle sniffed with disdain, claiming the air reeked of unwashed teenage boys. I tried to hide my eye rolls. The witches filtered in, and the cement doors slid shut. We milled around the common area, chatting idly with the warlocks, but the air crackled with anticipation. I hadn’t seen Michael yet.

Ariel and his men stood by the hallway, muttering under their breath to one another. John Henry lit up another cigarette, tapping his foot impatiently.

I made my way to the edges of the room, wanting to melt into the walls. If Michael wasn’t here, I had no desire to be here either. As I inched around the outskirts of the room, I felt a warm pair of hands around my waist. He pulled me backwards into the pitch-black hallway and I didn’t flinch.

“I missed you.” He whispered against my lips. The jeans and tee shirt I’d seen earlier were discarded – tonight, Michael was in a full black suit, with a small silver pendant close to this collar. I laughed softly. It had been a few hours, tops. I had this kid in the palm of my hand. Michael didn’t seem happy to overhear this; he bit down on my lip, then wedged his knee between my thighs. Rocking it there, the friction was unbearable. A moan rose in my throat, but Michael clapped his hand over my mouth before it surfaced. I ran my tongue against his thumb and his eyes darkened, even in the low light. He kissed me again, deeply.

“Tonight, doing all this, know that all I want is to be here with you.” His eyes smouldered with intensity. I believed him.

He pushed me into the room softly, smirking in the darkness. He didn’t come out until he was called.

Ariel’s hand rested on Michael’s shoulder like a proud father.

“Tonight, ladies and gentlemen, is a momentous occasion. The first warlock to ever attempt the seven wonders. Michael Langdon.” Ariel said his name like a prayer.

“No need for theatrics. The first task is telekinesis.” Cordelia said shortly.

Michael summoned the fire poker from the fireplace across the room, landing in his hand with ease. My heart soared with pride, then guilt. How could I be happy for him, and be a witch? Weren’t the two at odds with each other?

“Vitalum vitalis.” Cordelia declared.

A small, brown mouse lay dead on the tabletop. Michael gathered its tiny body into his hands, closed his eyes, and in seconds the animal was alive, sprightly.

“Concilium.”

Zoe and Madison’s bodies were pushed together by invisible forces, and they danced an awkward waltz. This all seemed to come so easily to Michael – he was the real deal.

“Divination,” Cordelia said, scattering a handful of stones across the table. “The locket hidden somewhere in this building-”

Michael immediately rose to his feet and strode to a small cabinet. I hadn’t even noticed it when we’d arrived. But somehow, he knew. The golden locket hung between his fingers delicately. The smugness emanating off Ariel was palpable.

“Transmutation.” Cordelia spoke. There was a smile in her tone – clearly, she thought this would be Michael’s downfall. She was searching for a chink in his armour.

Michael stood in the centre of the room. Closing his eyes, he took a deep breath. When I blinked, he’d moved twenty feet, to stand beside the warlocks. The boys’ cheers filled the room. Again, with a small puff of smoke, he appeared beside me, across the room. I longed to touch him, but quickly remembered where we were. He smiled softly. I ignored the witches’ sounds of disgust.

“Pyrokinesis.” Cordelia’s voice shook a little now.

Ariel handed Michael the short blade. Without a second guess, Michael sliced his palm open, letting the blood drip into the flame of a candle. The light was brighter than anything I’d ever seen – nuclear, incredible.

“The final task, descensum. Today, I am not asking you to perform this wonder. I am asking you to conquer it. You must retrieve Misty Day.” Cordelia said. My gut twisted – I was torn in half. One part of me knew Cordelia was grasping at straws, desperate for a rule change this late in the game to dethrone any potential Michael had at being our leader. The other part of me knew something about this boy wasn’t magic at all, it was something more.

Ariel asked for a word alone with Cordelia. The room burst into chatter the second they left.

Michael stood beside me, hands behind his back. His confidence radiated like flames.

“Are you nervous?” I whispered, keeping my gaze ahead of me.

“No. I have you.” He whispered back.

After some heated debate, and Cordelia appearing especially flustered, Michael laid on the floor, reciting incantations. Six minutes. That’s all it took. Six minutes for him to descend into Hell, Misty’s own personal suffering, and bring her back to life. He barely broke a sweat.

After standing up and straightening his jacket, Michael glowed with pride. He avoided looking at me, knowing better than to draw attention to us, but glanced my way a few times. I tried to make my thought as loud as possible – I am so proud of you. You’ve done so well. Thank you for bringing our friend back.

“Cordelia.” Myrtle spoke, eyes wide with worry. Our Supreme’s nose had begun dripping with blood, and she quickly stumbled.

“What’s happening?” I asked, rushing to Cordelia’s side. I felt her arms quivering weakly.

“What always happens when a new Supreme rises: the old one fades away. We demand what’s ours.” Ariel spoke, his face hard with determination. The other warlocks nodded in agreement.

“You are a pathetic pompous ass!” Myrtle yelled. It seemed to be directed at all the warlocks, not any one in particular.

“I did everything you asked. I descended into Hell, and I did what you couldn’t. I brought her back. I passed the seven wonders. Unless you want to add another one.” Michael’s said calmy, with a pinch of sass. His expression scorched under the surface.

“No. There can be no doubt. You are the next Supreme.” Cordelia managed, before falling to the floor.

“Cordelia!” I yelled, reaching out for her. Among the chaos, Michael smiled.

---

Later, in a room off the main corridor, Cordelia sat wrapped in a blanket. I hid just outside the door, listening. I had to know what was going on, what they were planning.

Misty brought in a cup of tea, and I ducked into the shadows.

“I knew you for such a short time, but I missed you forever.” Cordelia said softly, looking at Misty in awe.

“You should have left me where I was. That man you sent to fetch me – he gives me the heebie-jeebies. There is something wrong with him.” Misty whispered.

No. I can’t accept that.

“When he came to get me, he was…talking to somebody. Something. I could hear their gibberish, all around the classroom. Evil was speaking to him.” Misty recounted.

“Delia, what have we done? We’ve anointed that boy the next Supreme.” Myrtle lamented.

“He will never be the Supreme. I needed to know how strong he was. I knew there was something…dangerous about him, something dark. I had to keep him close, so we’d be ready. Something is coming. I can feel it. Michael Langdon has already given us an advantage – I have all my girls back with me.” Cordelia smiled.

My heart was by my feet and my arms were covered in goosebumps. There was no way Michael was as bad as everyone said he was. I knew in his core, there was good. I just had to bring it to light.

The women stood to leave.

I quickly snuck away, watching where I stepped so as to not let them know I’d been eavesdropping. Taking a few steps down the corridor, I hid I the shadows like a creep until they’d moved back into the common area.

“How long have you been hiding, angel?” A familiar deep voice asked behind me. I yelped, and Michael grabbed my hand to let me know it was him.

“You scared me!” I whispered, smacking his chest lightly.

He smirked, chuckling to himself. “Listening in on gossip?” He teased.

My stomach churned. “Something like that. They’re worried about Cordelia.” I lied. I focused on that blue light inside me, hoping Michael wouldn’t sense my heart racing. I knew in my heart I couldn’t tell him what I’d overheard, not yet. I had to understand it for myself first.

“How are you feeling, boy wonder?” I asked lightly, tracing the outline of his tie.

“Tired, and seen – I’m sick of everyone staring at me.” He growled, flicking his eyes at the warm light of the common room. He brought my hand up to him mouth, brushing his lips against my knuckles. I shuddered.

“I need coffee. I know a place.” He smiled, taking my hand.

 taglist: @theneverendinghunger @outpostmichael @angelicmichael  @leatherduncan