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devnmon · 2 years ago

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TS-19

Chapter Nine: Written in My Stars

Summary: After a long day's ride, sanctuary is discovered. But not all is what it seems in their newly found safe haven.

Daryl Dixon x Reader

Series Masterlist | Playlist

Chapter Warnings: descriptions of walkers/dead bodies, mentions of blood & needles, suggestive content, mentions of death, suicide, and lotsss of angst.

wc: 10.2k

A/n: This is the longest chapter of all s1 ahaha.. afraid to say they're just gonna get longer as I go on writing this fic. But... as season 1 concludes I'm ready to dive into writing season two when my semester ends, so it'll be a while before that happens. Enjoy this last chapter <33

The light penetrated your vision as it poured out from the large doorway. Gasps of disbelief were heard as Rick raced up to the entrance. The glass doors were heavy but when you pushed them open, a blast of cool air flooded your body.

"Hello?" Rick called into the building, the others spreading out as you all advanced into the building.

Upon first look, it was ominous. For one, the place was completely clean. There was no debris on the floor, no stench of rotting corpses, dead or alive, no blood anywhere to be seen. The high ceilings and windows only intimidated you further. Almost hidden behind Daryl's large figure, you followed him inside, bow drawn.

"Watch for walkers," someone spoke. There wasn't a chance your group would take a step further inside if even one of those dead freaks showed their faces. Where there's one, there's always more, and you knew the group wouldn't take that chance.

Frantic faces glanced about, searching for any sign to retreat out of the building.

How could this place still be standing?

Something was off about it, but you weren't sure what yet.

The unfamiliarity with what you'd seen in this building, versus what the outside world looked like, was unsettling. It concerned you more than the door even opening in the first place.

Clicking of a shotgun sounded from not too far away, your heart skipping a beat at the abrupt noise.

"Anybody infected?" A voice called out, holding a shotgun from down the hall. You didn't see the figure until you moved further into the lobby.

Holy shit. Maybe this is hope, you thought.

"One of our group was. He didn't make it." The sheriff stated, still holding his shotgun out as well.

"Do you see that guy?" you asked Daryl, walking to the side of him.

"Mhm.. don't know what he's got in store for us. But it'll do for now, that's for damn sure." He turned back to you, voice low but still in a mode of suspicion. You shot him a small smile and he turned back.

The man stepped closer, look on his face nervous, but you could tell he didn't want to have to shoot. None of you were infected, which changed his facial tone as he spoke again.

"Why are you here? What do you want?"

"A chance," Rick replied, out of breath from his yelling before.

"That's asking an awful lot these days."

Silence rang out as the unknown man's eyes trailed over every single one of you.

"You all submit to a blood test. That's the price of admission."

Rick nodded fervently, "We can do that."

"Once this door closes, it stays closed," The man said, walking towards Rick, his guard completely down at the moment. He rushed back with him, grabbing whatever bags were left in the vehicles, and entered the building again. As everyone rushes in, the blonde man swipes a keycard at the front entrance and states a command like he would to an assistant.

"Vi, seal the main entrance. Kill the power up here."

Who the hell is Vi?, you thought.

"Rick Grimes." The sheriff introduces himself to the blonde man.

"Dr. Edwin Jenner," he replied with shifty eyes.

Definitely suspicious, you thought to yourself. Shifty eyes, untrustworthiness, yeah. This guy's gonna have to convince me.

Jenner led you all to an elevator, where he let you all squeeze in, before pressing the lowest button of all levels.

Daryl, being the curious man he is, spoke up as the elevator ride turned to a cramped and silent one, "Doctors always go around packin' heat like that?"

He didn't trust good things like this often, always thought it was too good to be true. Though, Daryl was on his guard, ready to pierce an arrow through Jenner's skull if there was any sign of trouble.

"Well, there were plenty left lying around. Familiarized myself," he replied, looking back at all of you, "But you look harmless enough," he said, as he looked at Carl, "Except you. I'll have to keep my eye on you."

The boy smiled at his joke, making you smile a bit too. When you looked over at Daryl, his face was stoic, a version of his own mistrust his shield for the moment.

After piling out of the elevator, Jenner had you all walking down a long hallway. The place seemed like a maze, infinite doors and hallways you couldn't count. You and Daryl trailed behind everyone else, continuously marveling at the state of the place.

"Are we underground?" You asked, chest starting to tighten.

"You claustrophobic?" Jenner questioned, turning around as he walked ahead of the group.

"A little."

"Try not to think about it." He stated, turning back around.

Try not to think about it my ass, you thought, scoffing and continuing to walk with the group. The long hallway led to a massive room, filled with computers and one large screen on the wall.

"Vi, bring up the lights in the big room." Jenner's voice echoed out eerily, the clutter in the room not enough to mask the extensive shape of it.

There's that name again, Vi.

Daryl trudged into the room with you by his side, nervous at what was to come or what Jenner had in store for you all. As if on command, the room lit up with a ring of light hovering above all the computers.

"Welcome to Zone 5."

"Where is everybody? The other doctors? The staff?" Rick questioned, expecting more than just one man to be working at such an extensive place.

"I'm it. It's just me here." A moment of silence rang out as loud as the door opening had been, Lori breaking it with another question.

"What about the person you were speaking with? Vi?"

"Vi, say hello to our guests. Tell them, welcome."

The computer spoke, as if it had a mind of it's own.

Hello guests. Welcome.

You followed the Doctor down another hallway, as he brought you all to another room, one that looked like some sort of conference hall. Everyone took a seat against the wall or in one of the chairs.

"Sit tight, I'll be back with the equipment for everyone's blood tests." Jenner stated, before walking into another room off the one you were already all in.

"Ah shit, I hate needles," Daryl stated, taking a seat on one of the chairs. You scoffed at the irony of his statement.

"You're telling me big, bad Daryl Dixon is afraid of a little needle?" You inquired, turning to him as your weight flopped on the chair next to him.

"Didn't say I was scared, jus' said I didn't like 'em." He played with the strings of his bow as he replied. Sure, he'd been around needles before. But not in a medical context.

"Well, it's not that bad. Just a pinch, and if you're that bothered by it, don't look. That's what I do."

"You tellin' me you're scared of needles?" Daryl scoffed, realizing you two were more alike than he thought.

"All my life I've hated them, not shots at the doctor's, just whenever I needed an IV or blood drawn."

"Uh huh, we're the same then." He said, shrugging as he threw his head back on one of the seats.

"Guess we are." You sighed, doing the same.

Jenner came back into the room with several vials as well as other things he needed to take everyone's blood properly. He sat in the front of the room, as everyone watched the other's blood be taken. You went before Daryl, but he sat by your side, back turned to Jenner as he went on with drawing your blood. Once he finished, you turned to Daryl with a soft smile.

"See? Not so bad." He only grunted in response, taking the seat you'd been in a moment before.

A couple other group members took their turns, but when Andrea was in the seat, she had relentless questions.

"So, what's the point? If we were infected, we'd all be running a fever," Andrea stated from her seat across Jenner, as the vial filled.

"I've already broken every rule in the book letting you all in here. Let me at least be thorough." As soon as he was done, Jenner watched Andrea's light headed state take over, becoming light headed easily after barely any food. "Is she okay?"

"We haven't eaten in days, none of us have." Jacqui replied while helping Andrea sit. The look on his face had enough concern to fill an entire stadium, but he knew how to fix it.

Next thing you knew, you had been brought to a dining hall, sat next to the members of your group, shoveling food and booze into your mouth like there was no tomorrow.

A fit of laughter broke out amongst the people around you, relishing in the wine rushing through your system. Each bite of food was like heaven, filled with flavor and warmth that made you forget how abhorrent the world was outside the walls of the building. The euphoric tone it set for the group had Jacqui throwing her head back in a fit of laughter. You all seemed to be enjoying yourselves, food and drink coursing through your systems.

Your heart felt as full and content as it had once been, a long time before the world fell. It was a genuine, innocent time, one that couldn't be replicated or replaced. You were happy to just be caught in another moment like that after an extensive period without it.

When another fit of laughter broke out, it had been from Carl's reaction to the taste of wine. It brought tears to your eyes with how hard you were chuckling, smile lines beginning to ache from how big you had beamed from across the table.

Daryl noticed the shine from your smile from his seat, as he sat chugging the rest of his wine down.

You were chuckling loud enough for him to hear; he hadn't gotten to hear you laugh, genuinely and completely, ever. This was the first time he'd been lucky enough to do so. He stumbled, getting up to grab a fresh bottle.

"Why don't you stick to soda pop there, bud." Shane spoke.

"Not you Glenn," Daryl retorted, after grabbing another red wine bottle, walking back over to the table.

"What?" The dark haired man replied, cheesing so hard due to the buzz of alcohol in his system that his cheeks hurt.

"Keep drinkin', little man. I wanna see how red your face can get." He smirked, sitting back down at his seat. You burst out in a fit of drunken giggles yourself at Daryl's words. The alcohol in your system might have been distracting you from the horrors you'd seen the past few days, but to know you were there with these people you trusted made every torment wash away.

As you giggled to yourself, your eyes subconsciously found Daryl, sat across the table. His arms were poking out of that yellow plaid shirt, vest adorning his shoulders. His bicep muscles flex, moving ever so slightly, shaking your thoughts when you notice the group's conversation had died down a little.

Though Daryl's indulging himself thoroughly, he isn't blind to how Rick's gaze trails over to Jenner, sitting quietly and watching everyone around him in a corner. A moment later, Rick is clinking his glass and standing up.

"It seems to me, we haven't thanked our host properly."

"He is more than just our host," T-dog replied, raising his wine glass in a toast, causing you all to raise your glasses with him.

"Hear, hear!" Dale exclaims. The clinking of wine glasses overtook the man's words, as the others expressed their appreciation for him.

"Here's to you, doc. Booyah!" Daryl blurted out, the liquor in his system clearly taking over the usual grumpy attitude he always puts up.

It's got you giggling at him, again.

The laughter settles, and Shane starts to speak again. "So, when are you gonna tell us what the hell happened here, doc? All the uh- the other doctors that were supposed to be figuring out what happened, where are they?"

Though, Rick is quick to retort, not wanting to ruin the wholesome moment the group had going.

"We're celebrating, Shane. Don't need to do this now."

"Woah, wait a second. That's why we're here, right? This was your move- supposed to find all the answers. Instead we- we found him. Found one man, why?"

His persistence pisses you off slightly, but the alcohol in your system is too overtaking to have the strength to snap back at him.

Jenner goes on to explain that the rampage of dead walking corpses drove some to up and leave the facility. They hadn't been thinking straight, just wanted to get home to their friends or loved ones and spend whatever time they had left with them. On the off chance that those people didn't leave, some couldn't face the outside world, dead people walking and whatnot. The sheer brutality of it all. Some chose to opt out, as he'd said, taking their own lives in the hallways to avoid letting the terror that walked the streets into their minds. He'd only stayed in hopes of doing some good with what work he continued.

Silence rang out in fault of Shane, for bringing it up during a nice moment.

"Dude, you are such a buzzkill, man."

You all cleaned up the space after eating, then ended up following Jenner down yet another hallway, one filled with rooms available to get some rest in.

If i have to sleep on another cot, I'd just die.

"The couches are comfortable, but there are cots in storage, if you'd like."

Oh, great.

The alcohol is running through your system at such a fast rate that your brain doesn't pick up anything else that Jenner says, until he mentions the showers.

"If you shower, go easy on the hot water."

"Hot water?" Glenn repeats, an overjoyed smile on his face now.

"That's what the man said.." T-dog replied, smiling as well.

He meets your eyes, his bright facial expression turning yours into one as you realize how long it's been since you've taken a shower.

"Oh, hell yeah."

Just the first glance at the shower stall makes a chill run up your spine. After all this time with your guard up in the world you lived in, letting it down for something as simple as a shower made you shudder. The clothes on your body felt welded to your skin, soaked with sweat and dirt and who knows what else, like a filthy dish towel.

In such a way, you hadn't removed your clothing to relax with something like this in so long. To be this unguarded again after so long intimidated you a bit. There was nothing comparable to the vulnerability of a shower.

Every birthmark, scar and mark on your body was still painted on your skin, only covered from a layer of grime, sweat and dirt that built up from the wear and tear of the outside world.

A rush of clean, fresh water fills the room, with the shower turning on. Mist floats onto skin with warm droplets, like spritz of a water spray. It's almost anticipatory, the image of you holding the shower curtain back. To have something this humane after so long felt unbelievable.

A hopeful tone is set as you enter the shower, stepping in with the water beginning to heat up. It hits your feet first, warming them so, that it tickles a bit. With just the flow of water, your mask of filth begins to wash from your skin.

The several months old nail polish was still coated over your toes, realizing how long it's lasted.

You step further under the flow of water, just the aroma of it closing your eyes in relaxation. With your head under the water, you stood silently for a few minutes in the peacefulness of it all. The liquid runs hot, goosebumps rising over your body at the contact. It's warm, familiar, something you haven't known since the world fell. Like a hug from a close relative. Safe.

Having something like this back after so long without it made the moment even more euphoric, as if you'd never be without it again.

When your eyes shoot open, droplets trailing down your lashes, you look to the couple of bottles placed on the shelf. Shampoo, conditioner, body wash, and an unused razor.

Even before the apocalypse, you hadn't found the desire for relentless hair removal in your top priorities. Sure, you shaved a few parts of your body, armpits and face at times, but didn't bother with your legs or anywhere else. Especially not when there were other things that deserved more attention in these times.

You weren't especially girly, either. Didn't grow fond of dresses or skirts, not even wedding gowns stood out to you. You'd been a tomboy all your life, no reason to change now.

Pouring some of the shampoo into your palms, you massaged it through the crown of your hair thoroughly, the contact of your fingers scratching your scalp heavenly. The shampoo and conditioner both were refreshing to the smell, its lathery substance washing from your hair. A lack of dirt and grime on your skin lifted your mood, still a little tipsy from your wine at dinner, but nonetheless it made you feel completely clean for once. Who knew if you'd have the chance to be this tidy again one day.

Raking fingers through your hair, you wrapped your body up in the one clean towel and changed into your other clothes for the night, a pair of sweatpants and big t-shirt. You packed up the filthy clothing from before and balled it up, throwing it in a different compartment of your duffel. Passing the others in their rooms from the hall, you'd been about to enter the room you were to share with Andrea for the night, only to walk in upon Dale sat beside her next to the toilet.

She'd gotten sick from all she drank, and he'd been comforting her.

"Hey, everything alright?" Dale turned to you at the sound of your voice, look of concern in his eye.

"She drank too much, got sick. On top of everything that she's gone through, overcompensating on the wine wasn't the best idea."

A groan comes from Andrea at his words, still knelt over with her hair pulled back. You refrained from speaking as Dale shook his head.

"Okay.. I'll just find somewhere else to stay, then. Feel better, Drea."

Walking back into the hallway, you tried to find another place to hole up for the night, duffel bag in hand. It wasn't till you reached the end of the hallway, that you spotted Daryl sitting in one of the rooms alone, fiddling with his crossbow. His muscles contracted with every movement, biceps unveiled as they had always been. His shoulders and neck were tense, you noticed, and his eyebrows were furrowed

What's causing your tense state, huh?

He hadn't looked up from his task, whatever it had been, until you knocked lightly at the door.

"Hey, Daryl?"

He finally looked up at the voice coming from the doorway, eyebrows releasing from their furrowed state as he met your eye.

"Oh, hey. wh'sup?" He slurred, still under the influence from wine he'd drank.

"I was supposed to stay with Andrea tonight, but she isn't feeling the best. Could I possibly bunk with you for the night? I'd like some company when I sleep. Don't wanna be alone." You leaned against the door now, droplets from your hair wetting your shirt just the slightest. Daryl was quiet for a minute, noticing the cleanliness of your skin and hair. It was a different look for you, one that showed you to him in a new light.

Chewing on his lip, he nodded with a low mhm, then continued working on his bow.

Walking into the room, you were suddenly hit with an awful scent that made you grimace. Placing your things down, you sat on one of the chairs in the room, while Daryl sat on a cot he'd taken from storage, shirt unbuttoned a bit as his angel wing vest hung on the back of a chair.

"Did you get a chance to shower yet?"

Daryl glanced up again.

It wasn't that he hadn't gotten the chance, it was that he didn't think he needed it. After all the time spent in the woods, covered in filth, he grew accustomed to it. It was comfortable for him, and he couldn't find anything else more safe. The energy of washing all the evidence of survival off his skin- he didn't have that. Daryl didn't want to lose that proof of survival, either. It was easier than wanting to clean himself. So he just didn't.

"Nah, let y'all go first. There prob'ly ain't no hot water left, neither."

Gaze back to his bow again.

Although his eyes wanted to trail back onto your figure, clean and freshly smelling as opposed to his, dirty and filth-ridden.

There's no way she'd go for you, baby brother.

Shaking his head lightly at the thought, he placed his bow down on the floor.

Your head tilted at his action, compassion in your eyes that he couldn't see you had for him.

"Well, I'm not gonna go to sleep until you shower." You said pointedly, getting him to look at you again. There was a smug look on your face, like you knew how to get under his skin.

"Don't. Ya need rest."

"C'mon! Take advantage of the hot water and soap like you did those two bottles of wine, Dixon."

"You're funny, but still no." He rummaged through his bag as if looking for something that wasn't there.

What is it with him? Why is he so stubborn that he's missing out on things that are good for him? Make him feel better?

You sighed, feeling the leather behind you on the chair, an idea popping into your head. Daryl was searching through his bag, so you grabbed the vest from the back of the chair. It was heavier than you thought it'd be, and stunk like cigarettes and motor oil. But it smelled like Daryl.

"Okay, well I didn't wanna have to resort to this." You stood, pulling his attention from the pack, "You've lost vest privileges, Mister Dixon."

"I've lost wha'?"

A confused look on his face turned to an annoyed one as you slipped the vest over your shoulders.

"Cut that shit, give it back. Now." He started to saunter towards you, but you stepped back slightly.

"It was on my chair, and until you shower, it's mine. I'm not staying in here all night if you're gonna stink up the place."

"Then go find somewhere else to sleep!" He yelled, throwing his arm in the air.

"Can't, rooms are all booked. No vacancy! Guess you're gonna have to listen to me after all."

Daryl rolled his eyes, "Don't do that. Seriously- y/n, give it back." He advanced closer to you, not threateningly, but starting to get irritated with you.

"Shower, and you get your precious vest back. Easy as pie." Shrugging, you inspected the vest as it weighed your shoulders down a bit.

"Nah. An' I don't even like pie."

"Ugh, you're so stubborn! Just listen to me, Daryl, a shower can do wonders for relaxation. You certainly need it."

He scoffed, "I am relaxed," eyebrows raising at your words, stepping back from you just an inch or so. His buff arms crossed over his chest, biceps flexing.

"Really? Cause the tension in your shoulders says otherwise." One of your hands rested on your hip now, the other clutching his vest in your grip.

"Stop it. Gimme-" Your hand yanked the vest away from his grasp as he leaned forward again, arm out to grab it from you.

"Daryl, is this about something else? You can tell me, you know." You met his eye, pausing him in his tracks. You knew there was something else, something he wouldn't let come to light, but he couldn't hide it now. Not after you specifically called him out for it. His gaze dropped to the floor before sighing and looking back at you.

"Don't you think this place is for real?" He took a seat on the cot again, shifting his weight and sitting hunched over his legs.

"How do you mean?" You asked, sitting down as well, dropping the vest back onto your chair.

"Like, do ya think we could survive in this place. I mean, there ain't no other doctors here, just Jenner, and I don't think he was tellin' us the whole truth. There's gotta be more to this whole place. I jus'.. don't trust him."

"Yeah, I wanna believe that we can. Daryl, I don't think he's gonna stab us in our sleep, if that's what you're assuming," you chuckled, "He's been kind and let us in, given us food, water, soap, alcohol? Why would he-"

"Exactly. He's given us all this stuff, even a place to sleep. Why would he waste all that shit on us? Cause Rick said we were desperate? Nah. There's gotta be more to it. We're nothin' special."

Nothing special? Me saving you from certain death was nothing?

"We're not?" You repeated, taken aback a little at his statement, "Cause I-I don't think people who are nothin' special survive a horde of walkers, let alone travel all the way here on basically nothing for a slim chance at survival."

How could he just push aside everything the group has been through? Did joining the camp really mean nothing to him? Did-

Did meeting you mean nothing to him?

"I didn't mean it like that. Ain't no society, no 'thing' to be anymore. We're all nobody. Shit went down the drain... day I saw a walker for the first time. Tha's when I knew we were never comin' back from it."

"Daryl, you can't think like that. You're not nobody to me, you're my friend. That makes you somebody. It makes me somebody, makes Rick somebody, Dale, Lori, Carl, even Glenn. This group makes us all somebody to each other, and if that's all we have, then so be it. We can make it through. No matter how long we're alive for. But we've gotta do it together."

Daryl sighed, sitting back against the wall. He went silent, contemplating everything you'd said, and his blue eyes glanced at you before sitting up again.

"Alright," he drawled, "Now, what's a man gotta do to get his vest back?"

A genuine laugh came from you, optimism light in the air for both of you, when he seemed to chuckle as well.

"Well, for starters, you can take that shower.." You mentioned again, a part of you wanting to see what Daryl looked like when he didn't have dirt and sweat plastered across his skin. You wanted to see how his biceps flexed every time he moved, wanted to feel them twitch as he lifted something heavy.

Woah. Has he always been so handsome?

Daryl scoffed, the slightest twinge of a smile making itself apparent on the apples of his cheeks.

"Fine."

He strode out of the room silently, giving you a few moments alone to collect your thoughts and get ready for bed.

Daryl walked down the hallway, passing each of the rooms everyone had settled in for the night. Once he found the showers, he slipped in and kicked off his boots at the door. Dirt cluttered out of the soles of his shoes, not realizing he'd been wearing them for so long.

He met his gaze in the mirror, shying away from his face to the dirt covering his arms and neck. To be quite honest, he did feel disgusting. But he owed it to you for convincing him to even think about showering, let alone doing it again after so long.

Slowly, he undid every button of his sleeveless flannel, tossing it onto the chair in the shower hall. He didn't dare turn around to look at his back, or memories from decades ago would come back to bite him in the ass.

He couldn't. Not now.

To pull himself away from going there, he thought about you, the soft image of you in your sweatpants and t-shirt, damp hair as well as your face illuminated by the lamp light. From what you looked like at camp, till now, was a way different image of you.

You seemed calm, content, okay, given the circumstances.

How he wished he could do the same.

Daryl found comfort in you, tried to hold onto it as best he could, without getting attached. If he did that, it would be over for him. He'd be pining away for the rest of his life.

There was just too much up in the air about Jenner for him to think straight, which almost pulled his focus from you, but he didn't.

Jus' relax for the night, dumbass. Worry 'bout that shit tomorrow.

He began undoing his pants, dropping them to the floor along with his belt. All his thinking about you made his boxers tighten, not becoming apparent to him until he looked down.

Fuckin' serious righ' now?

Stood in only his boxers now, he turned the shower head on. Daryl tried to ignore the confines of his boxers becoming tighter, and only when the water was hot enough did he strip himself from them, and step into the shower.

A low groan left him as the hot water covered the expanses of his body, trickling down the front of his torso, dampening his skin and the wiry hairs on his chest. When he pooled some of the shampoo in his hands and began washing it through his short hair, he squeezed his eyes shut, those pesky thoughts about you and your soft gaze only making it harder to focus on something that wasn't you.

The soft scent of his shampoo, how the water felt against his back.

Nope, nothing was stronger to distract him from the horrors of the outside world, other than you. His thoughts shifted from what you looked like in those clothes, to what you looked like without them. Though he hasn't seen all of your skin, he wished he'd have the privilege to see it one day. To have you in his bed, doing sinful things to make you feel good. To have you call out for him in the name of your pleasure.

Daryl.. Daryl... Daryl...

Your voice was the sweetest of all; behind your spitfire demeanor was that kind-hearted person he met in the woods that day. He knew from the day he saw you that he thought you were beautiful. Perfect, even. Like no one he's ever met before. Especially not someone he knew because of his brother.

How, he thought, how could someone like you become a person in his life? He thought he sure as hell didn't deserve it, someone kind willing to talk to him, be around him, listen to him talk?

Can't get attached.

The left over suds of shampoo trailed down his body, reminding him of the reason his boxers were tight. His gaze finally trailed down there, now apparent of how caught in a daze he's been over you.

Can't walk back in there with a hard-on, either... man, fuck it.

Daryl decided to indulge himself just this once.

Once, and it'll never happen again, he told himself.

The satisfaction washed over him when he'd finished entertaining himself over filthy thoughts of you. When that was gone, guilt came creeping over him like a devil on his shoulder.

Got no fuckin' right, thinkin' 'bout her like that. I got a better chance gettin' to the moon than ever gettin' them. She don't want some redneck trash deadbeat Dixon.

As he turned the water off, he stepped out of the shower, grabbing a towel hanging on the wall. He dried himself accordingly, draping it over his shoulders as he pulled on his dirty clothes he'd tossed to the side before. Steam from the hot shower clouded the mirror, walking up to it again.

He looked different, soaking wet hair, face bare of dirt or sweat or walker blood. All of the sudden, he felt his eyelids droop just the slightest bit.

Guess the shower did somethin' right, can't wait to hit the sack now.

He trudged back to the room he shared with you, where he saw you sat with a book in your hands. First glance at you like that made his heart drop, thinking you'd found his journal, was reading all of his intimate thoughts, broken his trust. But no.

You'd picked out one of the books in the recreational room, which Jenner mentioned was full of games and books for anybody's use. Once you'd spotted the shelf of classic literature, you couldn't help yourself.

The place had every story you could imagine, Emma by Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice, Little Women by Louisa May Alcott, even The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald.

Safe to say you grabbed a couple of the ones you were familiar with, and one or two you hadn't read. You started with Of Mice and Men, but stopped when you remembered the ending.

Although once you picked up The Great Gatsby, you couldn't put it down. It was one of those novels that made you want to live in the 1920's, just for the fashion. Flappers and the massive growth in modernization always fascinated you. Prohibition, though, never seemed ideal.

Before you headed back to your room, you thought on what Daryl had said about not trusting Jenner. He was right, in a sense. Jenner wasn't telling the whole truth, and there was no knowing what else he'd been hiding about the place. It all seemed eerie, but you remembered to bring it back up to Daryl before you both fell asleep.

You'd been reading silently, when you heard the familiar thump of Daryl's boots down the hall. Everyone else had turned in for the night, hallway dimly lit by other sources.

"Welcome back, wow you smell exquisite." You laughed, peeking up from the book in your hands.

"Pfft, stop." Daryl sat back onto his cot, blanket splayed across it. He hadn't known how to start conversations properly, especially not after doing what he just had in the shower. Thinking about you in a way he shouldn't have.

His flannel was unbuttoned, tiniest sliver of his torso visible, falling further apart as he leaned back. It began to pull back further, but you stopped looking before getting caught.

Get your head out of the gutter.

"Feeling relaxed, now?"

He chewed on his lip silently, giving you a low mhm, as he shoved off his boots onto the ground, kicking his feet up on the cot. The hairs on his chest were slight, but still visible.

"So, I've been thinking about what you said. About Jenner." You closed the book over on your thumb, Daryl lifting his head from the pillow.

"You were right, we can't trust him. He's shady, and probably hiding more things than we thought. We gotta grill him for info, tomorrow or something. It's the only way we'll get the truth. You know?"

"Don't know if Rick would be cool with it.. much less anyone else. But we are gonna find out what he ain't tellin' us. I can promise ya that."

"Good enough for me," you said, standing up and placing the book on the couch, "Alright, well I'm gonna go brush my teeth. Carol stopped by while you were in the shower and gave you and me toothbrushes and toothpaste. Swear I've never been so ecstatic in my life."

You chuckled before leaving the room, slight smile on Daryl's face, one you couldn't see. One he wished for you to see. One he grew a liking to plastering across his face because of you.

Groaning, he laid back on his cot, before realizing he hadn't journaled yet today. A hand darted out to his pack, shifting through his belongings to find another shirt for him to wear, and his journal.

Day nine

Somehow we made it to the CDC. It looked like another dead end at first, bodies scattered all over the place. Some doctor let us in, Jenner. Y/n rode with me the whole way on my bike. I think she sees me, like really sees me. Strange, feelin' like someone cares about me for who I am. Never expected that from anyone, not even her. She's stupid to care about me, and I aint no good, neither. Spent the night eatin' real dinner and drinkin' real booze with the group. Thought the night would conclude with me passin out drunk. Then y/n asked to stay with me. She would'a stayed with Andrea, but since she wasn't in the best place, she came to me instead. Even convinced me to shower. Weird how much she affects me already. Rubbed one out jus' thinkin' about her. Fuckin' dumb thing to do. I ain't got no right feelin' that way about her. She's a friend, never gon' be anythin' more.

With that, he closed the journal, tossing it back into his bag and replacing his older shirt on his body with a somewhat clean one before you came back. Daryl attempted to get himself to actually relax, and once his head hit the pillow, the same fatigue that washed over him in the bathroom returned to his head.

Though he was laying to face the wall, he heard the slight pitter patter of your feet approaching the room from down the hall. You entered silently, closing the door and shutting off the light.

Silence was present in the room, and he thought you'd passed out, until you heard you speak.

"You're a good man Daryl. You may not see it, but I do. I don't know what you've been through, but whatever walls you put up, you'd better think about taking them down."

That was the last thing he heard before drifting blissfully off to sleep.

The next thing Daryl could focus on was a splitting headache, one he'd gotten from his lovely two bottle of wine drunk. Relentlessly, he tried to make it go away, but sleep didn't come as easily as it once had. His instinct was to get up and turn on the light, but paused when he remembered you were in the room with him. If he turned the light on, you'd wake up and lose some of your rest that you very much needed.

Daryl's hand darted out from the covers to his pack, grabbing the flashlight and his journal from it as he stood from the cot. Cracking the door open, there was a small source of light coming from down the hall. Once he clicked his flashlight on, he began striding down the hall.

He came across the rec room, void of any people. One of the clocks read 4am, which meant he'd been asleep for about 4 hours at most. Once he sat, he opened another page to his journal and started a new entry.

Day eleven

It's 4 am. Only know cause there's a clock in this rec room. Had to take a walk. Made me feel like shit for leaving y/n alone when she asked for company while she slept. I'm gon' go back, just needed a minute to clear my head. I don't completely trust Jenner, he's hiding something. Definitely more to what he told us. I've been tryin to keep these people safe best I can, so if there is something else goin on here, I've gotta find out. Don't wanna lose any more people. Can't. Won't. Them undead pricks won't stop me. Won't stop us. I'll do whatever it takes, for this group.

Once he'd finished, he shut the book and headed back to the room to find you still asleep on the couch. Sleep washed over him a while after he laid down again.

The rough knock on the door was loud enough to shake you from your slumber, reading the clock in the room that said 8:45. Daryl snored lightly from across the room, chest lifting with each breath. He looked peaceful, laying under the covers of his cot like it was the best sleep he'd gotten in years.

You wondered what it would be like to actually wake up next to him in the mornings, brush the hair from his face and leave a soft kiss on his cheek before rising for the day.

But you couldn't, and you thought you never would.

You rose silently, letting the archer catch a few more minutes of rest while you put on clothes for the day, and slipped your boots on again, brushing your fingers through your hair to calm some of your bedhead. The mirror on the wall helped, as you rubbed the sleep from your eyes. You remembered to pack both toothbrushes and toothpaste from the previous night, before walking over to Daryl, fast asleep on his cot.

"Hey, psst. Daryl," You poked his chest once, twice, three times before his eyes fluttered open.

"Wha-"

"C'mon, they're making breakfast. I can smell that bacon from all the way in here. Maybe we can find out what Jenner's keeping a secret today, too."

He groaned, sitting up and rubbing his eyes, still half asleep. You glanced at him from where you stood by the mirror, he looked adorable, even in his drowsy state. You noticed the darker color shirt he was wearing, the top buttons undone, chest hairs visible. You could've sworn you saw a tattoo poking out from his left pec.

Before you could stare any more, his eyes opened fully, pulling himself off the cot. His pants were unbuttoned, a sliver of his boxers visible as he stood. You tore your eyes away from him, although you wanted to look more.

Daryl cleared his throat, buttoning his pants as you combed your hair in the mirror. He walked towards you, turning back to him.

"Ready?"

"As I'll ever be."

The door opened, light beaming from the hallway. Some of the group had already exited their rooms, hearing their chatter from down the hall. The two of you walked into the room you had all ate in the night before, smell of bacon and eggs filling the place.

"Eggs, powdered, but I do 'em good." You hear T-dog say, walking over with a pan in his hand. "Protein helps the hangover."

Glenn, on the other hand, is sat upright, head in his hands, groaning loudly for everyone to hear.

"Morning, everyone." You stated, taking a seat next to the dark haired man, Daryl sitting next to you. A few others said good morning back, others too caught up in their hangovers to speak. Rick looked about as bad as Shane did, but not as terrible as Glenn looked.

Lori glanced up at you, her eyes shifting to Daryl as you took a plate and served yourself, "Eventful night?"

"What? No- I just read some books and went to sleep." You chuckled, trying to break the awkward tension floating in the room.

Rick picked up a pill bottle from the table, asking Lori about it, responding with, "Jenner thought we could use it. Some of us, at least."

"Ugh, don't ever, ever, ever let me drink again."

The group conversed lightly as everyone woke up, sipping their coffee and eating their meal. You stood to grab some coffee as Jenner walked in.

"Morning."

"Hey, doc."

You saw Andrea nod to Dale, turning towards Jenner in his chair.

"Doctor, I don't mean to slam you with questions first thing-"

"But you will anyways."

"We didn't come here for the eggs," Andrea states.

Jenner brought you to the same big room again, standing in front of the screens while he spoke a command to the computer: Give me playback of TS-19.

Displayed on the monitor was the playback he requested, closing in on an internal view of a brain, along with other pieces of data. Jenner demonstrates that the lights flowing through a much closer-up image, was someone's life; their experiences, memories, thoughts- it was everything. He continued rambling on about the test subject, someone who was infected by a bite, but volunteered to have the process recorded for research.

Scanning to the first event per his request, the playback began to display the doctor's research, as the lights in the brain began to flicker rapidly, fading to darkness quickly after. Solemn expressions plagued the room upon hearing Jenner's analyzation of the infection's course.

A moment later, he scans to the second event, playing back on the monitor the same as it had before.

What Jenner calls resurrection points reveals itself to be that moment of reanimation you'd watched in Amy, two days prior, not to mention the individuals you saw on the road before finding your group.

The same brain flickers with red light, hearing that it restarts the brain stem, only lasting a few seconds before its termination occurred. You and Daryl shared a confused look, silence ringing out loud enough to hear a pin drop.

Andrea puts two and two together and questions Jenner yet again, only this time it's on account of not having a clue as to what the virus is.

"There has to be somebody who knows something. Somebody, somewhere.."

"I've been in the dark for almost a month, but I hear France was the longest to hold out. But that's as far as I know."

That was the moment your heart dropped. You inhaled sharply, losing the grasp you had on any hope left.

"Man, I'm gonna get shitfaced drunk, again."

At that point, you might as well have joined him, if there really was nothing left anywhere in the world. It was all gone.

Your vision filtered out of focus, room beginning to spin as you lost any strength you had in your legs, as your body hit the cold marble floor.

It felt as if a moment passed where your eyes were fluttering open, attempting to push yourself up with the help of your forearms. Your head pounded, each voice muffled as you went to grasp at your head that was now throbbing in agony.

As the aching settled a moment later, you were finally able to clear your foggy vision on the person crouching before you, Daryl.

"You alright?"

"I- uh, what happened?"

"You fainted, sure ya not still drunk?"

"N-No, just-"

The recollection of what you had just been told by Jenner became apparent in your mind, the horror flooding through your head once more.

"There's nothing left, is there?" Your voice weakened, not sure whether to be bothered with the way four of the group's men just ran out of the larger room in a panic.

"C'mon, lemme get ya back to the room, 'kay?"

Nodding, he pulled you up, draping your arm across his shoulder with your head still pounding. Daryl brings you to the couch you'd slept on the night before, as he lets you sit down on it.

"You think Jenner was serious? About there being nothing-" You inhaled again, unsettled feeling coating your stomach at the thought.

Daryl stood chewing on his thumb, now pacing back and forth, "Ain't sure, 'specially not with the way he went quiet." His pacing became aggressive, grabbing the bottle of whiskey on the ground that he'd apparently put near his cot the night before.

Your conversation was cut short after hearing a commotion about the air shutting off in the rooms.

Why is the air off?

What's going on?

Voices echoed from outside the room, Daryl peeking out of it with the bottle still in his hand. Jenner was the one being questioned relentlessly by the members of your group as he treaded down the hallway.

Why's everything bein' turned off?, you hear Daryl say as Jenner walks right by him and swoops the bottle of liquor from him, taking a swig. He follows Jenner out the door, quickly rising from the couch to follow him and the rest of your group on the quest for answers.

Energy use is being prioritized, he replied, admitting to not having any control over the building's programming. Zone 5 is shutting itself down.

Daryl's frustrated state grows with annoyance, fed up with the doctor's vague answers and wanting some real ones.

"Hey, what the hell that mean, huh? Man, I'm talkin' to you! What'd you mean it's shuttin' itself down? How can a building do anything?"

"You'd be surprised."

Another vague answer.

The computers were programmed to be the very last thing kept running until the power grid shut down completely, beginning at the half hour mark of a digital clock with large red numbers, counting down the minutes.

What the fuck... what happens at zero..

"Let me tell you something-" Shane bolts towards Jenner but Rick stops him before he can get any closer to the doctor.

"To hell with it, Shane. Lori, get our things- everybody, get your stuff, we're getting out of here, now!"

That was the sign you'd been scared of getting, one that meant retreat in the most devastating way. Heart racing, you all turned for the door, until a loud alarm sounded out, startling you even more.

Thirty minutes to decontamination, the computer played out.

"Doc, what's going on here?" Daryl yelled, straining his own throat at the looming unknown of what was to come in those thirty minutes.

Suddenly, the hallway you'd been heading towards was being blockaded by an automated door, and by the looks of it, there was no getting through it.

"Did he just lock us in?" Glenn spoke, "He just locked us in!"

Anger overtook Daryl in a wave, throwing himself towards Jenner with every intention of beating his face into the ground, only to be ripped away from the chance, getting pushed away from him getting any closer.

"I told you, once that door closed, it wouldn't open again. You heard me say that."

"It's better this way."

"What is? What happens in 28 minutes?!" Rick questioned incessantly, standing a few feet away from the doctor.

Jenner had gone off on one of his rambling tangents again, only this time it was in a fit of rage, attempting to make the group realize why this place was built the way it was.

"In the event of a catastrophic power failure, H.I.T's are deployed to prevent any organisms from getting out."

"H.I.T's?"

"Vi define-"

H.I.T's: high-impulse thermobaric fuel-air explosives.

It continued on to state how they'd be set off as the timer runs out, lighting the air on fire with its two step process. Gasps of horror and cries filled the air as the computer had all but handed you each a death sentence on a silver platter.

A chill rushed down your spine at the realization: every single one of you was going to die.

No chance of survival desired by the effect the explosives had promised. They would set the air on fire.

Some of the group clutched their loved ones in their arms desperately, while others only stood around, any hope they still held washing away from their expressions.

We're all going to die here, you thought. There's nothing left, anywhere. We were doomed from the start. How could we be so stupid? So ignorant? So filled with hope and determination to make the world better for us, to survive, when there's nothing out there that could fix this? Nothing that could make it better?

Any hope you'd still clung onto was pooling out of your body in a pile of unseen ambitions and delusions you'd foolishly looked forward to for the future.

Daryl's anger only burned, a forest fire that only grew larger with every time he yelled out for the doctor to open the door. You sat crouched against a wall, huddled with the rest of your group that wasn't doing everything they could to release the door.

We're fucked. We're so fucked.

"You should've left well enough alone. It would've been so much easier." Jenner stated, the men still throwing themselves at the door.

No, no, no. This doesn't make anything easier.

"Easier for who?" Lori spoke, offended with his words that were so clear of an attempt to pull you all back from this realization.

"All of you. You know what's out there-a short, brutal life, and an agonizing death."

His words, although speaking from a scientist's point of view, began to sink in, but not in a way that sent death to your door terrifyingly.

The words of your group members were muffled, focusing on your heart beating so infuriatingly fast, until you heard: Those doors are designed to withstand a rocket launcher.

The next words you heard were the heated ones coming from a familiar voice.

"Well, your head ain't!"

You glanced up from your lap, viewing how Daryl threw himself at the doctor, once more getting pushed away from the man before inciting violence on him.

There's always hope, you heard Rick say, Maybe not here, but somebody, somewhere-

No, there's not. Not anymore, you mumbled to yourself.

Within his rage, Daryl managed to take a few deep breaths, eyes trailing over to where you sat. His focus changed from the situation at hand to the frail state of your body, legs pulled to your chest and hands shaking with every move they made.

"What part of everything is gone do you not understand?"

This is our extinction event.

After an outburst from Shane resulting in him shooting several of the computers, then Jenner, with a shotgun, you only felt more despair fill your chest. It made you raise from the floor in fear of getting run over. The state of everything had already converted people to such evil, why would you want to live in a world like that?

"I think you're lying."

"What?"

"You're lying about no hope. If that were true, you'd have bolted with the rest, or taken the easy way out. You didn't. You stayed when others ran. Why?"

"Not because I wanted to. I made a promise," Jenner stood from his chair at Rick's questioning, pointing to the monitor, "To her. My wife. She begged me to keep going as long as I could. How could i say no?"

Bang.

Daryl was at the indestructible door again, sending blows down on it with an axe.

"She was dying."

Bang.

"It should've been me on that table."

Bang.

"I wouldn't have mattered to anybody. She was a loss to the world."

Bang.

"Hell, she ran this place. I just worked here. She was an Einstein. Me, I'm just Edwin Jenner."

"Your wife didn't have a choice. You do. That's- that's all we want- a choice, a chance."

"Let us keep tryin' as long as we can," Lori stated, with Carl in her arms. The tone in her voice made you break a little, but there was no changing what your fate had decided.

"I told you, topside's locked down. I can't open those." Jenner walked past Rick and the others to another computer, swiping a keycard and pressing a few buttons on a pad with numbers.

Just like that, the door opened.

Daryl was the first one to yell out, being he was closest to the door.

"C'mon!" He started out the door, but entered again when he realized you hadn't followed.

You felt empty, the fight for hope dwindled to just ashes, somewhat like and end to the blazing fire of life, living, surviving. The whole world was gone, and there was nothing to be done about it. All the feeling from your chest faded away.

"I'm grateful."

"The day will come when you won't be."

Gasps and desperate yells sounded out from the group, alerting the group of their one passageway out of the building. While everyone grabbed onto each other, you stood in place.

Glancing around the room through tear-brimmed eyes, you noticed not everyone had bolted out the door, either.

Jacqui and Andrea stayed in place as well.

"Y/n! What're you doing? Let's go!" He bolted towards you, only watching as he approached with a solemn face.

"I-I can't. You go."

"Wha- n-no. I ain't lettin' ya. 'M not just leavin' you here."

"Yes, you are, Daryl."

She's not in her right mind, the coercion of Jenner's words had gotten to you, he thought.

"Hey! we've got four minutes left! C'mon!" Glenn yelled out, still stood by the door with Carl and a few others, as Lori pulled Rick out the door.

T-dog tried to bring Jacqui with him, only to be shoved away.

"No, I'm staying. I'm staying, sweetie. I'm not ending up like Jim and Amy. There's no time to argue, and no point if you wanna get out."

"Just go." You whispered, walking a few steps from Daryl.

How could he tell you why you dying would be the worst thing that would happen to him? It would rip him apart, piece by piece until he only became a shell of himself.

"I can't, you know I can't. I'm not leavin' you here." He only followed after you, not having the right words to say to you in a hopeless time like this. "You were the one that told me there was hope, remember?"

"Daryl-" you started again, kicking at the debris on the ground.

"Nah. Listen to me. I ain't goin' if it's not with you."

"You're insane," you scoffed, arms crossed over your chest.

"And you're not? Come on, there's always somethin' to fight for. Just gotta find it. How can ya if you ain't with us? We're gonna do it, make the world better. If we can't do anythin' about the geeks, we can only do it in spite of 'em."

Your eyes glimmered with fear, but he could've sworn he saw a light of hope, so he continued.

"You can find somethin' new to fight for, I swear on my fuckin' life. I can't-" Daryl sighed, "I can't lose you. I won't. You mean too much to me. You're my only friend, the hell 'm I gonna do with you gone? If you're not around, I got nothing to fight for. Nothin'."

Daryl's voice broke amidst the other conversations.

That was the moment his eyes met yours, flicking to light the fire of survival in you once again. Tear filled eyes met his, pulling him in for an embrace, and against his skin, you whispered.

"Okay. Let's go."

With that, you both ran for the doorway, pushing the ticking clock of death away with every patter of your footsteps. Eventually, you'd gotten to the front of the building, where the rest of your group was figuring out how to exit the building. Glenn spotted you and Daryl coming closer towards them all, a slight smile on his face.

Their methods of getting the window's glass to break had failed, until Carol rushed towards Rick, pulling something from her bag.

A grenade.

Once he got close enough to the glass, he pulled the pin, urging everyone to step back to be guarded from the blast. You all but threw yourself far enough away, hearing the effect of the blast shatter the glass with a loud boom.

You all dashed out of the window, spotting the vehicles down the road from where you'd parked them. Walkers had heard the blast and began to approach, only to be taken down by bullets from your group. Once you reached Daryl's bike, you looked back at the building one last time, before it was blown to pieces.

Two figures emerged from the broken window, Andrea and Dale.

You heard Lori yell from the RV to get down, both you and Daryl crouching behind the Winnebago before the blast rang out.

All you heard a few seconds later was the massive explosion of the building, along with a wave of heat that radiated all the way over to you all. Daryl panted, looking at you before hopping on his bike, starting the engine. Hopping on behind him, the engines of each vehicle sounded out, as they began to drive away.

You clutched onto Daryl's torso as the bike engine began, shuddering breaths filling your chest. Before he began driving, you tapped his shoulder.

"Daryl, thank you for getting me out of there. You're right, I do have something to fight for."

His eyes lightened, nodding before pulling his weight off the ground and driving the bike away from all the wreckage.

You'd found something- better yet someone to fight for, and it happened to be the very archer your arms wrapped around.

You chose to fight for him, of all things.

Just as hard, he'd chosen to fight for you.

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tutuandscoot · 2 years ago

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Ok I’m just gonna start my own thread on this here and blab about some quick thoughts while I’m thinking of them..

I went to the girl’s IG page who did the podcast and she had on her story her talking saying it’s (the T interview) out and she’s really proud of it blah blah blah.. and apparently people are reallyyy pissed about the teaser..

Now let me preface this by saying I’m not gonna get into a whole discussion about what specific/possible info was to follow the teaser.. that’s not the point (for people wondering, the teaser content is not in the actual podcast) I just want to say my two cents, obviously I don’t know the woman so I don’t want to be too judgemental.. but..

That was a really dick move.. to post THAT as the teaser. I feel like, especially if you’re Canadian, you would have to be living under a rock not know about TS and the shit storm they dealt with, then especially if you are going to interview her (and also seemingly are friends/acquaintances with her) that doing that (posting that teaser) is… to use a really ugly term.. ship bating/stirring up the conversation. I’m assuming most people are pissed about not getting to hear what specifically it was T had to say, I’m more pissed about the actual action of posting that as a teaser in the first place if it wasn’t gonna be in the interview and the consequences of that.

There are people who are going to hear that teaser and go ape shit on the internet- mostly the negative kind of apeshit because anyone with empathy and a moral compass has gotten over everything and has no place for that crap in their lives. Of course I was excited and curious when I saw the teaser, but to be fair I get excited whenever there is a new T/S interview out. I often don’t expect to hear new info because I respect T’s (and Scott’s for that matter) privacy and I’m just happy to hear them (either/both) talk because I admire them so much I don’t care if it’s the same info I’ve heard before..

Like I said I don’t want to judge, but just let me throw out a hypothetical/assumption.. that sound bite is gonna make people curious.. how could it not? Like I said the sane and sensible people will be excited to listen regardless, but something like that is.. I’m just gonna say it, it’s bating.. its getting people to listen to your podcast that otherwise wouldn’t to do so thinking they are getting some inside “””””gossip”””””/ “”””””truth bomb””””””. It’s the same crap that went on after the olys- specifically Ellen.. all she fucking asked was ‘oh what what you’re not a couple, not ever???’ And that’s all it was. Obviously TS had to agree to do that and probs expected it on some level but that was just bating them, that was the only conversation- that’s why they were there, not for their gold medal or their achievements. So posting a teaser like that, like I said had it been in the interview and we heard T’s side which she would’ve explained so beautifully, by not including it it’s bating those very same people who only cared about TS for the ‘’’’’relationship’’’’ of it all. Some people will listen just for that. They could’ve posted any teaser and people would still be excited to listen- T is inspirational and engaging and a wonderful person people should be eager to hear her speak about her and not need some tease that plays right into the drama she’s finally mostly free of.

Why the fuck would you do that!!!??? And again just to say it point blank: it’s using TS relationship to get engagement. (I’m not saying this was the intent, but it is now the result/assumption and others have done similar similar things). That is so low.

I’m not so much pissed about not getting the info that was to follow that teaser, but more the irresponsibility of posting it and not giving answers, because people can’t be trusted. I fear for what shit is to come on the dark, demented corners of tumblr/elsewhere- what theories are gonna fester since T wasn’t given the opportunity (in the actual interview) to say her peace. Sure whatever T ended up saying was gonna start conversation .. everything she says has a sick bunch of people scrutinising it still.. idk I’m ranting at this point.

So I’m not gonna comment on the woman’s IG page my complaints, I’m just gonna rant about it here. I think it’s irresponsible. I’m just gonna assume that T was all chill with it being in the interview coz she said it in the first place and posted the teaser herself, and I just pray she doesn’t face a bunch of people bombarding her demanding to know what she was going to say. (Idk tho this is an assumption maybe T knew it wouldn’t be in the final interview but I highly doubt that- she’s not gonna go listen to her own interviews).

Other then that, I though it was an ok interview. The interviewer talked wayyyy too much. T is such a darling she always makes it a conversation by asking the interviewer their thoughts and perspective which is so sweet but then don’t go on forever we are here for T not you. As always Tessa was so eloquent, so poised, she speaks so thoughtfully and so passionately, whether that’s about Scott or her work now. They tease at the start of the actual interview that there’s some new stuff T hadn’t shared before (yeh then they just didn’t fucking include it). There were lots of edits in the footage so whether that was for time or them laughing/breaking (you know what I mean) or they were deliberately cutting stuff out… idk it was just bit choppy- the convo for them probs flowed well but not so much as a podcast. Honestly from my perspective and thoughts and deep feels for them (TS) is that everything she said- some new/worded differently is legit everything I’ve already thought. Some stuff I’ve legit said before in the same/similar wording, other stuff now that she has actually said I feel I can say now coz she was confirmed it for me. I’m so so so happy for her that she is loving life and all these new opportunities she has made for herself. Some of it is hard for me to listen coz I’m in a bit of a rut right now in life and share similar experiences to her and just her resilience and.. idk positivity in life is hard for me to hear and come to terms with.. just in regards to life direction is hard coz on one hand she is so inspiring and makes you believe anything is possible but also I’m just never gonna be a tenth of the person she is as far as strength and courage. That’s often why I get emotional hearing her talk.

So yeh. Those are my first thoughts and complaints. Don’t know if I’ll do a full dedicated swan dive post into the actual conversation details 👉let me know if you guys want me to👈Otherwise there were some really interesting points like I said I’ve been wanting say for ages that I’ll just work into inevitable future posts.

Me randomly waking up at 4am: ‘I’m not gonna listen to the new T interview rn’

Me at 4:05am: ‘I’m not gonna listen to it rn just go back to sleep’

Me at 4:10, 4:30, 4:50: ‘just wait till later in the day!’

….

Me at 5am: *starts listening to it*

Me at 5:30: ‘ok well I’m defs not going back to sleep nor will I be of any function for the rest of the day because I’m in fucking tears’

#oh yeh one small additional complaint:#the guy off camera said his mum is the biggest VM fan and that is just factually in correct #*incorrect #I’m legit here with my blog at 4am next to my barbie T #and embroidery art of T’s dresses hanging on the wall #and my hand sketches of photos of them #making yt videos and IG reels and in depth essays about all their programs #and ok I have never seen them live but I love very very far away #*live #but yeh all I have to say is sit down Brenda #and hold my beer #go listen to it all this will make sense

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thetomorrowshow · 4 years ago

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i will make the sky collapse

Next - Read on AO3!

A/N: Hi, and welcome to my first ever fic for the Newsies fandom! This fic focuses on Crutchie’s time in the Refuge and will be six chapters long. Eac chapter will be cross-posted on my AO3. Content warnings will be posted at the beginning of each chapter, but this whole fic will be full of violence and angst.

CW: blood, intense scenes of violence, non-descriptive (but for sure uncomfortable) references to past deaths of children, a rat is eaten

There were only two boys who were by the entrance when they hauled in the new kid. Bart and Twig, eleven and thirteen respectively, were meant to be scrubbing the floor in the hall at that time, on punishment and missing whatever scraps had been scrounged up and thrown to the other kids.

News traveled uncommonly slow in the Refuge, but it was barely an hour before everyone knew. It was even less when Harley heard of it. By that time, there were already rumors spreading--some said the newcomer was barely three feet tall and no more than a sack of bones, others claimed they’d seen him walk in at a proud six feet and show himself to Snyder’s office. One thing that everyone could agree on, though, was that the kid was a newsie. Harley was sure that this kid was just like any other poor nobody who got thrown in here, but he’d have to wait until after his orientation was properly over to assess the boy.

The Refuge needed leadership, and that job had been Harley’s since Spud was freed a month before. Without a kid to keep them in line and hand out hope, the boys turned on each other, snarling and biting like they were no better than Snyder himself. The first month they hadn’t had any fight-related deaths was under Spud’s rule, and the kids were generally happier for it. With someone in charge, they had a person who would listen, a person they could blame, a person who would stop them from killing each other. Right now, that was Harley.

The kids got something else out of it too--ranks. It was amazing how much someone’s morale could be lifted just by telling them they were the treasurer, or the secretary, or the first mate. Every boy in the Refuge had a position, and each one played at pretend business like their lives depended on it--which they did. It was nice to have them cooperative, instead of nasty like they’d been before.

Working together was better than working for oneself, but it had made it harder in some ways. Just last week, they’d lost six-year-old Mark to pneumonia. If Mark hadn’t been assistant to the war general, nobody would have cared or noticed. Now they cared too much, held a service in the middle of the night with a nicked candle, and averted their eyes from his bunk that was too big to be empty at a time when they were already squished three to a bed.

Now, though, whispers were traveling through the hundred-some kids that were scrubbing at the endless grime around the building. “Newsie,” Harley heard, and “Jack Kelly.” That one came filled with wonder, excitement even. Jack Kelly was the only one of them to get out and come back with help. Jack Kelly was the kindest guy anyone had ever known. What did he get out of stealing clothes and food, then risking his own skin just to bring it to them? Nothing, but he did it anyway. And he was from before the camaraderie of hierarchy, so he really didn’t have any reason.

It was possible that the new kid knew him, but Harley wasn’t about to be caught pinning all his hope on some random boy. It wasn’t like Jack Kelly was going to break everyone out of the Refuge for one kid.

Most everyone was outside today, digging endlessly with calloused hands as the sun beat down on them. There was no purpose to the holes, other than graves. Mostly they just dug them up and then filled them back in, though it had been only last month when a guard had pushed in Justin and made them fill it up over him. Justin had been sick, though. He was going to die anyhow.

Harley tried to wipe over his eyes, only succeeding in mixing more dirt with his sweat. He hated the hours spent with the splintering shovels--they all did--but it was better than the chemical water used to clean inside. He’d had to give up a couple of meals to save Stink, who had been forced to swallow a mouthful of it by a guard.

Speaking of guards, one left the building, quite literally dragging the new kid behind him. Harley made a pretense of shoving his dirt into a neater pile, watching carefully. The boy was average-sized, maybe blonde, face too covered in blood to really tell anything else. Harley felt a slight sense of relief. A broken nose was a rite of passage here that most got from Snyder or a guard, but some (like Harley himself) had dodged it only to wake up his first night to a circle of preteens ready to sock him.

There was no real way of discerning that this kid was a newsie, other than the fact that his clothes looked a bit nicer than most of those here. Still, that didn’t mean anything. Without a newsboy cap, Harley wondered where the rumor had come from.

The guard dropped him by the two spare shovels and growled something at him, likely a command to get to work. Some of the other boys had stopped to look around at him, so Harley made a show of dropping into his hole and digging vigorously.

After an hour or so, he risked a couple of glances around. Three guards were watching them lazily, occasionally smacking a boy for working too slow. The new kid was far too slow, though, and as a result, was targeted by the guards. Harley looked away when he heard a stifled cry from his dig spot, not too far from his own. There was nothing he could do to help right now.

Eventually, though, the new boy had been beat to the ground and wasn’t getting up. Most everyone had paused in their work, glancing at him, then away, then back as two of the three thugs kicked at the boy. Dry, rasping breaths came from him, and once again, Harley turned away, back to his own backbreaking work. He’d learn soon enough that he couldn’t stay down.

But he didn’t, and less than ten minutes later, Harley was watching again. He saw as a guard stomped on the kid’s leg, earning a muffled whine, and wondered--oh. There was something wrong with his leg, he realized, as he saw how twisted the foot was. He couldn’t stand, no matter how badly the guards threatened him.

And now that Harley had noticed, he could understand the words the boy was choking out.

“My crutch, please,” he whimpered. “I ain’t gonna be able ta work without it, please, I can work, I just needs my crutch. . . .”

“Jump,” one of the guards taunted. “Jump, and we’ll let ya have it!”

The kid struggled to get up, wiping at the tears that were making the dried blood on his face run again. He couldn’t even stand, though, let alone jump. The guards kept kicking him back down, pushing him into the shallow dent he’d managed to dig so far, mocking him with the same words. It turned into a threat--”Jump, you’ll jump if ya know what’s good for you!”--then to a compromise--”Just one little jump, and we’s leavin’ you alone for the rest o’ the day.”--to a dream--”Jump, crip, and we’ll let ya go tonight!”

But the boy couldn’t jump. He couldn’t stand. Harley watched, sick, as the boy’s eyes slid closed and his grimace hardened as the guards kept whaling on him. Then he turned away again. He couldn’t worry about some new boy with no name. He had to keep his clan strong.

Eventually, the thugs got bored of beating up a kid who wasn’t responding. One of them wandered inside, the other two left to taunt Billy, and Harley let himself steal one last look at the motionless pile of rags. As he watched, the kid’s eyes flashed open and met his. Slowly, one eyelid flickered down in an unbelievable wink, accompanied by a strained grin.

That was a newsie, for sure. The rest of the kids on the street had learned to never smile years ago. Harley looked away for the last time and got back to his work. He couldn’t waste time if he didn’t want the same fate.

The guards hated this kid, dragged him to the cellar instead of to the bunks for the half loaf of bread that had to be divided up between them all. One less mouth to feed, he rationalized. They didn’t have enough to feed themselves, let alone to spare for a new boy.

Stink managed to catch a rat, crushed with the heel of his thin shoes, and was attempting to roast it over a candle when the boy got thrown into the room. All the boys went silent at a hand from Harley, then watched the new kid as he lay, breathing heavily. Eventually, his head raised, looking around the room with watery eyes.

“What’s a guy gotta do ta get a welcome ‘round here?” he rasped. No one answered. A few of the younger ones looked to Harley, including Red, who had arrived just two days prior. After a moment, Harley nodded at Twig. Twig motioned for some other boys, all members of the welcoming committee. They were proud of their jobs, and would treat him well. They wouldn’t do anything to help him proper, but they would get him a bunk and a sip of water, and what more could a man ask for?

They boy’s name was Crutchie, they found out when Twig announced it, and he was indeed a newsie, as well as crippled. He did know Jack Kelly, and said something about a newsboy strike. He said that Snyder had taken his crutch after beating him with it, and now he wasn’t sure that he’d be able to get around at all.

The welcoming committee carried him to a bunk, which, from the gravelly protests, was apparently not much appreciated. The boys all returned to their own business, which was mostly whispering among each other or trying to get a bit of the dirt off before sleeping. Harley watched the new kid, now sitting on Mark’s old bunk, from across the stuffy room, before stepping around the huddled masses to get to him.

“Name’s Harley,” he introduced himself, holding out his hand before seeing how swollen Crutchie’s fingers were. Probably stomped on; he withdrew quickly.

“Crutchie,” the kid said with another painful smile. “You was lookin’ at me outside, huh? My face that good?”

His face was terrible, to be perfectly honest. Caked in blood and dirt, Harley could just barely see the purpling lumps on his forehead and the shallow gash along his cheek.

“Nah, I’m in charge ‘round here,” Harley answered seriously. “I’s got the job of checkin’ out the new meat.”

Crutchie frowned. “Jack says there ain’t a ‘in charge’, just kids.”

“Jack Kelly?”

Crutchie nodded, and Harley chewed on that piece of information for a moment. This kid clearly knew the guy well enough that they had spoken before. Maybe he would be worth something. He wondered how much Kelly would be willing to trade for one of his own.

“Yeah, well, things is changed since Jack Kelly was here last,” Harley answered, then left for his own bunk. He’d always wondered if he was meant to say more than that, but Spud hadn’t exactly left him with a book of instructions.

He had no place for a cripple in his ranks, but he couldn’t exclude anyone or else the guys would start doing the same to each other. Spud had always said that for unity, everyone had to feel important. He’d have to think on it.

“Stink! Gimme some o’ that,” he whispered across the room. Stink sighed and tore off a pinch of the greasy, undercooked rat and dropped it into Harley’s waiting hand. The others were clamoring for some too, but not the new kid. No, Crutchie was still laid up in the bunk, gingerly checking over himself and tearing off bits of his own shirt to wrap some of his worst wounds. There was a scarily deep cut across his ribs, surrounded with swollen bruises that were barely visible in the candlelight. Harley winced. That was ugly, especially for a kid’s first day.

Something sank in his stomach, and Harley knew. That kid wasn’t going to make it out of here. He’d be lucky to survive the week. Sure, he must’ve been a survivor to make it as a newsie, but this wasn’t the streets. This was the Refuge, and that kid was just another fly caught in the Spider’s web, about to be devoured.

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purple-babygirl · 3 years ago

Note

Bucky’s little is obsessed with him tickling her ❤️

Pairing: Daddy!Bucky Barnes x little!f!reader

Warnings: ddlg dynamics, fluff turned smut, oral (f receiving), fingering (f receiving), nsfw content, 18+ content.

Word count: 1,720

A/N: this has been in my WIPs for like at least 3 months because i suck like that. Nonnie, if you're still here, i love you and never meant to make you feel ignored i apologize:"💜. Please enjoy xx

~~~

tickle time

She loved so much about being Bucky’s little, one thing being the privilege to be tickled by his long, fast fingers at any given moment. She was obsessed with the way his nimble digits stroked over her sides, spreading goosebumps throughout her body as her delighted screams reached the ceiling.

And Bucky would never miss a chance to be the cause of her uncontrollable giggling.

“Tickle time!” She announced out loud before plopping herself on Bucky's lap.

He let out a dramatic “ouff”, making her chuckle cutely, before his fingers put down the book they were holding, and with a sly smile on his face, found her sides to tickle her.

Barely a minute in and she was laughing, screaming and thrashing; begging to get away even though she'd asked for it.

Bucky wouldn't let her though. He carefully slid her off his lap and on the couch, got on top and started tickling her harder, burying his smiley face in her neck, his slightly chapped lips tickling the soft skin there, “where do you think you're going?”

His metal fingers glided with ease as they stroked her over the thin material of his shirt. Her head was thrown back and her legs involuntarily kicked as she squealed, “dada!”

Whatever the time or place, she was ready to get tickled till she’d lost her breath and Bucky was always more than happy to give her just that.

“Tickle time!” Bucky heard her giggle before he felt her wrap her arms around his waist from behind.

He grinned silently, setting the spoons he was tossing the salad with down. He wiped his hands on the towel slowly, knowing she was waiting.

“Dada, it's tickle ti-” Her own startled shriek cut her off when Bucky turned and in the blink of an eye she was in the air and tossed over his shoulder.

She squealed and swung her legs lightly as he carried her to the bedroom, laid her down to tickle her and pulled the loudest laughs from her chest.

“Oh, no, where do you think you're going?” Bucky laughed and pulled her back to him by the ankle when she tried crawling away to avoid his torturous, determined ministrations.

“Dada!” She screamed out yet another laugh, her smaller hands trying to push his big ones away from her sides. Her cheeks hurt from laughing so much.

Her shirt has ridden up from all the squirming and Bucky immediately put his mouth on the showing skin, gently biting at her tummy, his fingers never stopping as she giggled louder and writhed harder.

Bucky’s lips then sucked on her flesh before letting go, making her blush and giggle at the sound. He liked the reaction too much not to repeat it.

“How’s that feel, doll?” Bucky wondered, pecking her belly button.

“Feels tickly. Tingles everywhere,” she panted, giggling again when Bucky nuzzled her tummy and nibbled on her flesh.

“I’ll take that,” he mumbled and the vibrations from his lips tickled her more.

It was like that almost every day, sometimes more than once in the same day and Bucky cherished those happy, sweet moments with her more than anything.

“Dada, what time is it?” She asked as she stood by the door to Bucky's office.

“It's almost two, dol—”

“'Ts tickle time!” She ran inside, putting her arms in the air.

“That’s like the third time today.” Bucky smirked as he lifted her up to seat her on his desk.

“It's tickle time, daddy. I don't make the clock.” She shrugged seriously, making Bucky laugh aloud before laying herself down on his desk and letting out a quiet giggle in anticipation.

Bucky calmly put his papers back inside the clear file, before he stood up and planted his hands on either side of her, caging her between him and his desk.

“What am I gonna do with you?” He shook his head, his stare was slightly different and it had her cheeks warming up.

“Dada,” she whispered bashfully as Bucky leaned forward.

“Shh, doll, it's tickle time,” Bucky confirmed in her ear before pecking it.

He slid his hands under her shirt, holding her sides and she shuddered in expectation.

She was so soft and so beautiful and all his.

She felt Bucky slowly blow hot air on the side of her neck. She let out a small giggle, her head leaning towards her shoulder to hide from Bucky's tickling breath. He softly blew down the column of her neck again and she giggled louder, jerking away.

Bucky chuckled, pressing a kiss to her warm skin and started lightly sucking on the spot behind her ear.

A different type of goosebumps pricked her skin, but Bucky’s fingers gave her no time to react as they began their sweet, languid torture on her sides.

Feeling both the metal and flesh directly on her skin along with Bucky’s lips on the sensitive spot behind her ear, she couldn’t stop the moans bubbling out of her chest with her giggles.

“Dada,” she sighed when Bucky’s fingers slowed down their movements, her small hands clutching the end of Bucky’s desk.

“What is it, doll?” Bucky questioned teasingly against her neck before bringing his face to hers and pecking her lips.

“I feel tingly.” Her breathless, low, timid admission made Bucky smirk as he bit down, her body already putty in his hands.

“Here?” he asked, squeezing her sides where he’s been tickling.

She shook her head shyly.

“Here?” Bucky’s lips brushed against her ear.

She shook her head again, her eyes shutting as Bucky’s hands inched further up under her shirt.

“Here?” He peppered kisses up and down her neck.

“No.” shook her head, her breath picking up as Bucky’s right hand squeezed a boob.

“Where then?” Bucky hummed, his thumb rubbing over her hardening nipple.

“Dada,” she whined, her clutch moving from the desk to Bucky’s muscly arms.

“You’ve gotta tell me where, doll. Or otherwise I won’t be able to make the tingles stop.” Bucky pecked the side of her mouth teasingly.

She took his metal hand out from under her shirt, the other still playing with her nub, and pressed his open palm between her legs, right on her mound, “here.”

She could hardly hear her own voice, but Bucky did. He’d heard her clearly and his satisfied grin was proof.

“You want daddy’s help, doll?” he dragged it out while he had her exactly where he wanted her, the tips of his fingers mischievously caressing her covered core.

She was already wet and he could feel her, hot and slick behind the thin panty.

“Yes, please, dada.” She swallowed, awaiting Bucky’s relieving touches.

“You got it, baby.” Bucky pecked her lips one more time before taking off her underwear.

“Let's see.” He gently pulled her lips apart using his thumbs to 'take a close look'. Her tight hole closed around nothing and Bucky felt his cock strain in his pants.

He let out an actual moan at the sight of her bare, open core, all wet and glistening and needy for him.

“You feelin’ tingly here, doll?” Bucky pressed his thumb to her button, rubbing lazy circles over the tiny bud.

“Y-Yes, dada. Please.” She breathed, her eyes watching her Daddy’s every move as he brought his face closer to her pussy.

“I can fix that,” Bucky whispered, his warm breath sending tickles up her spine and she opened her legs more, biting her lower lip.

Bucky pressed his tongue to her entrance, slowly licking up her silky lips, groaning at her taste. Her head fell back on the desk as a mewl escaped her.

Her whines were uncontrollable the second Bucky got his lips around her throbbing clit. Her fingers were tangled in Bucky’s hair as she writhed a different kind of writhing because Daddy was giving her a different kind of tickle time filled with different tingles.

Bucky kept his mouth on her clit, his lips sucking on it while the tip of his tongue massaged it, making her moan and wiggle on his desk. She tasted so good and he couldn’t get enough, his tongue sliding down to her core to lick her sweet arousal.

“Dada, plea-ah you’re making it more tingly,” she moaned, tugging on Bucky’s hair, making him hiss.

“But I thought you liked being tickled, baby?” Bucky asked against her core, the vibrations from his lips making her eyes roll as her clit pulsed even harder.

“Please,” she whispered, her jaw going slack as she felt Bucky’s finger poke inside her pussy.

He slid it in up to the knuckle before curling it upwards and her back slightly bowed off the desk, “what about now?” Bucky teased, pushing another finger inside her, his teeth softly nibbling on her clit.

All she could do was beg, a string of pleads leaving her mouth. Her fingers tugged harder on Bucky’s strands as she succumbed to the pleasure. The spot Daddy kept poking at inside of her made her feel the evil, yet delicious tingles everywhere from the back of her neck to her cunt. Even her toes were tensing with her abdomen.

The tip of Bucky’s tongue found the head of her clit, swelling and peaking from underneath the hood and kept flicking it again and again until her thighs were closing around his head and her fingers were pulling hard at his hair.

“Daddy.” One broken moan and she was gone, stars exploding behind her eyelids as their fire burned inside her.

Her pussy wildly contracted around Bucky’s relentless fingers as her back fully arched off the desk.

The pleasure was too good, the tingles too much and she screamed, her legs wrapping around Bucky’s head and trembling.

Bucky let her clit go, pressing soft kisses to the sensitive nub as his fingers slowly slipped out of her pulsing center.

Her back was on the desk again and she was panting. She closed her legs shyly, pressing her thighs together, her clit still throbbing.

She was already looking fucked out but Bucky wasn’t having it.

“Where do you think you're going? Now it’s time to fix daddy’s tingles,” Bucky said, one hand palming the bulge in his pants as the other stroked up her shin, “open those legs wide for me, doll.”

~~ Tags: @harrysthiccthighss @tinystudentfirepurse @lavendercitizen @tumblin-theworldaway @pretty-pop-princess-hs

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introloves · 4 years ago

Text

commission for: @kattsamu, @chaotickatts thank you SO MUCH for being so patient with me my love, it means the world.

this is a commission, body type described, skin color also mentioned.

hard dom! sakusa + daddy! sakusa + impact play + praise + pet names + impact play + oral fixation + creampie + f! reader

— word count; 2.2k

he loves you. sakusa kiyoomi knows he’s in love with you when he reaches out to you past the first couple of dates, swallowing down the shake of anxiety with the thought of you possibly saying no, but you never do.

he knows he loves you when he finds comfort in the way he wraps thick arms around the warmth of your body, even on days where the distaste for any contact weighs heavy- he finds his way to you, wanting to bury a masked face to your neck right after practice, knowing you’re there with open arms.

even past the fabled honeymoon phase- sakusa kiyoomi is still irrevocably in love with you.

now the both of you have settled into a pleasant rhythm.

off days don’t come often, but they’re usually spent in your arms- that's what they are normally like anyways, but there’s something different to him this time around.

he’s found something interesting.

he’s not normally a curious person, but seeing your screen propped up to a certain website certainly piqued any and all curiosity he harbored. twitter was normal, he knew you used it to post art, that wasn't what was so interesting.

it was what was playing that had sakusa kiyoomi stop in his tracks.

hearing you preoccupied with something else let him snoop for a second, his own face lighting up at the video playing- eyebrows shooting up with the content of the video, cock already twitching with the thought of doing all of those things to you.

he’s seen enough, quickly straightening up and making his way to you, plan already cooking up in his head, because if there’s one thing sakusa isn't, it's ill prepared.

and now, he’s lulled you into a false sense of security, eager palms running down every curve, digging into the plushness, blunt nails curling into the warmth.

he eats up every shiver, every keen- he truly wonders how he’s never seen it before, wondering why he didn't read into the shy glances of eagerness when he digs his fingers in harder-

why he didn't connect the way your cunt clenches with vigor with each reminder to keep your eyes on him in the moments you get too lost in the pleasure.

he thinks he’s the biggest fool for not being so adventurous, knowing deep down that the role you want from him is one he could step into easily.

so he does, leaning down, lips barely pressing against the heat of your neck, tongue outstretched to lave a lick up the pale skin there.

cock throbbing, heavy in his sweats while he curls his body down to meet your own- a whispered statement leaves him before straightening up- lips curling up in a knowing fashion at the absolutely flustered expression painting your already pink face.

“w-what?” you question, trying hard not to squirm even more underneath him.

he thinks it's really cute, watching your eyes regard him with worry. curls following gravity when he bends down once more, tickling your forehead, sloppy kiss pecked to your lips- huffing out a chuckle before coming away once more.

“i know, sweet girl.”

there’s a moment of crawling anxiety when you think back, trying to decode if there’s anything you’ve been hiding from him, because surely he’s not talking about the needs, fantasies, wants you have.

you’ve kept them tempered down for now, knowing that it’s still too early to spring things on like this- but with the way he’s regarding you, dark eyes pinning you back onto the bed with intensity, you’re not too sure.

“k-kiyoomi, i don't know what you’re talking about.” you whisper, hands coming down to push against his chest, wanting to run away with the thought, but all he does is catch your wrists- pulling up your hands to lay pretty above your head, fingers on one hand easily capturing both, the other resting right between both tits- slowly crawling up and up.

“mm, i saw- you left a porn video up... and i saw.” he nearly purrs, cooing at the way you finally squirm, head tilting up against the bed when his hips come down to rub onto the heat of your cunt- grunting at the way your legs kick around him.

“‘omi-”

you want to shy away, but he doesn't let you- clearly enjoying the reaction you’re giving him.

sakusa tsks at the nickname, the slow crawling hand finally reaching your neck, pinching any words or thoughts before he even puts any pressure to the sides of your neck.

“daddy-” he interrupts, eyes wide with eagerness at the cry you give him, letting you wiggle underneath him before grunting out your name. “i’m your daddy pretty girl, always have been- ‘ts a shame i had to learn what you wanted from a twitter video first.” kiyoomi grunts, giving the hands wrapped up in his a push into the bed, stern reminder to keep your hands there.

“getting that sweet pussy wet from a nasty little video, when i’m right here-” his eagerness feels like it's teetering over; wanting so badly to have you, wanting to prove to you that he can give you what you want. he brings his hands to the waistband of your underwear, swiftly tugging it down- throwing it carelessly to the side, reaching for the band of his own underwear and getting rid of them too- just a glance at his cock you can see how hard he is, the thought of indulging you in what you crave is nearly too much for him.

his cock is a pretty pink, deeper at the head. glistening in the light available to you both, thick veins crawling up his length- he only looks at you with lidded eyes, lips parted slightly to pant while he strokes himself.

your silence has his lips curl up in a kind smile, hand reaching down to bite the pads of his index and thumb on either side of your face, making you look at his dark colored eyes instead of his cock.

even with the way he's gone stern, there’s still the edges of him rounded out for you- still finding his heart beat in excitement at seeing your cunt, wet and clenching for him.

he thinks it might be too much to prolong this any longer, so in a swift move- his thighs knock against your own warm and thick ones, slotting his lean and muscled body between the cushion.

bending his body down to meet your lips, tongue swiping along the pout of your lower lip, sucking noisily while he guides himself to meet you.

it’s always an effort to take him, but with the newfound eagerness you’ve unknowingly brought sakusa, he wastes no time in sinking his cock down to the hilt in one smooth thrust.

lips still messily slotted against your own, he swallows up that cute little moan you give him, hands tingling with the effort to keep them off of him, and of course he notices it.

heavy breathing only heard while the two of you get accustomed to his length, he pulls away just enough to hungrily grunt- hiss that you can go ahead and touch him, voice near warbled with the way it feels to finally be plunged into your cunt.

“be real sweet about it-” he grunts, stopping any movement of your hands to his body, letting you nod and gaze up at him with pure want at the instruction.

“mm, ‘ts my good girl.” sakusa grunts, hips stuttering against you when the warmth of your palms meet his neck, fingertips curling up into the already damp curls atop his head.

the soft whines you give him, your hips already starting to wiggle against him have his eyes shut momentarily.

he can’t help it- everything about you is just so intoxicating to him, every squeeze your cunt gives him brings a soft grunt, deciding that you're a sweet girl, you can take the first, hard slap of his hips down onto your own.

and you do, fingers holding onto either side of his head pressing down with it. wasting no time, wanting to hear the sharp slap of skin against skin- he brings his cock back into you, balls squished down onto your ass with the force of it, body crumbling down towards your own.

glazed eyes meet your own, keening with the way you react at every hard, body trembling thrust, thinking to himself that it’s a shame you’ve kept quiet about wanting to be fucked like this, thick, muscled forearms resting onto the bed by your head, whispering soft coo’s of, ‘it’s okay-’ ‘you’re taking me so well.’

you need the reassurance, unable to keep your body still under him, squirming with every jiggle of your tits and stomach and ass- all from the force he’s fucking you with.

it’s nearly too much and you try to keep still, you do, but he’s never brought his strength down onto you, crushing the air right from between your lungs thanks to it.

sakusa can only look down, trying to bite back the gentle reminder to keep still, knowing it won't get to you with how hard he’s sinking his cock back into your leaking and pulsing cunt, so he resorts to a way he now knows that will get your attention.

he pulls away near completely, watching you gasp, trying to reach up and take him back- but he keeps his course, hand coming down to reach your thick thigh, tugging it up and over- bicep curling as he does, keeping his cock inside you while he turns you over, immediately reaching down to hook hands into your hips, helping you perch your knees into the mattress.

“poor baby-” sakusa grunts, bringing his cock back into you even harder this time, hardness of muscle digging into the fat of your ass- hand reaching back, tips of his fingers coming down onto the already jiggling skin, nearly laughing at your reaction-

he sees your body tense, feels a gush of arousal leak down his balls at it, watching your ass turn red from the impact before bringing another harder slap.

“already fucked dumb- arent you?”

he coos, and of course you can't answer, tongue heavy with lust, eyes crossed as your cheek squishes onto the bed- but that doesn't stop him from hissing out an,

“answer me, brat.”

the call forcing you to turn your head, legs helplessly twitching, already on the precipice of a blinding orgasm, all thanks to his unending pounding of your pussy.

“y-yes! daddy-” you sob, hands twisting helplessly into the bedding, whole body once more seizing, unable to breathe when you finally cum, all joined with another slap to your ass, no longer hearing the slap of his hips to your own while you do.

sakusa stops for a second, just a second to really take in the sharp arch of your hips, the pretty, sharp scream tumbling from your lips while you squeeze his cock.

it takes him squeezing his eyes shut for just a second, hands still digging into your sides while you shake to keep his own orgasm down, barking out a- “you should see your face.” through a tight clench of his teeth, lilting tone nearly laughing with your whine calling back as a response.

he cant help but look at the way your mouth drools onto the bed, reaching to slide two fingers into your mouth, pressing down onto your tongue, urging you to, “suck” with frenzied eyes when you do. you’re so good for him, of course you would.

he leaves heavy digits into your mouth while he lets your body twitch, groaning with every sweet suck you give him.

he waits patiently for his own turn, waiting until you stop squeezing, until the shake of your body comes down enough to resume his own pursuit to cum, wanting you to be fully aware while he shoots his cum inside you.

hand landing heavy on the curve of your back to push, wanting you nice and pliant for him, and of course you can’t do anything to oppose him, too tired from a blinding orgasm, only able to coo and listen to the even wetter snap of hips down onto your own-

eyes zoned onto the strings of your cum attaching his pistoning hips to your own, he knows he won't- can't last long.

but it’s all okay, slowing himself down enough to whisper one more command-

“mind your manners, and say thank you.”

sakusa grunts, smooth strokes coating his cock completely with your wetness, twitching with every squeeze.

your eyes shut tight, still sensitive- letting him have his way with you, and just like he says, spurred on by the final, bone jolting thrust he gives you- he seals himself against your hips to let his thick cum paint every inch of you- you call back, words mixing in with his huffed grunts-

“t-thank you- thank you daddy.” you coo, waiting for him to give you everything, everything he has before letting himself join your twitching form.

“mm, you’re welcome my sweet girl.”

he whispers, spent- his own body weak, all with the way you make his heart thrum in his chest.

sakusa kiyoomi knows he’s in love with you, when he swears he’d bring the stars, and moons, and sun down the sky- he knows he is when he’d do everything for you, finally wrapping strong arms around your form, tucking his face into the heat of your neck- lips finding the quickened pulse of yours and leaving loving kisses there, all while he makes sure you’re satisfied.

#sakusa #sakusa kiyoomi #sakusa smut #sakusa kiyoomi smut #haikyuu smut #sakusa x reader #sakusa x reader smut #sakusa x you #sakusa x y/n #haikyuu x reader smut #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu x you #smut #commission #one shot

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sameglasses · 2 years ago

Text

i'm sure many people talked about it before, but i actively hate how the ts crew deals with ads, merch, or even basic communication and i need to rant about it too a little (the rest's under the cut, i didn't think i'd be that long but here we are lol)

there's another youtuber that i admire a lot more for this. half his channel is "regular" videos on pokémon strategy, and the other half are livestreams, let's plays, best-of etc (his name is Fildrong btw, if you're speaking a little bit of french and you like pokémon go check out his content, he's super funny) this dude knows how to run a channel, and it shows; he always keeps in touch with his fanbase, letting them know what comes next for videos, let's plays, merch, bigger projects, etc. he reaches out to artists whenever he needs to and pays them decently by the way, he lets the fans know when he's going to have some rest, etc etc. you know, basic stuff

and you wanna know the best part? he's doing this alone. he makes collabs with friends or artists, obviously, and he has an editor for his best-of only, but he runs most of his channel on his own

Thomas and his team don't get this; they're not a group of small creators anymore, they're running a whole business, and it hurts to see a business this big doing it worse than some dude doing more "modest" content on his own (depends on the videos tho, i don't think a roadtrip throughout Europe on a bike is what you could call "modest") (yes, Fildrong did that. twice. the absolute madman)

they're trying to capitalize on a series that's slowly dying because of the lack of communication, or even respect for its fans. i don't think Thomas himself is that invested into it anymore, but i'd much rather him telling us that than trying to make as much money as possible without making actual content. hell, if he even wants to cancel sanders sides altogether for any reason, i'm fine with it!! i'd be disappointed for sure, but at least he'd stop the massacre and do a Cartoon Therapy 2.0

you could claim that because Fildrong has a much smaller fanbase, it's easier for him to communicate with his fans, and to that i'll answer: Markiplier someone else made the same comparison (i can't remember the url, wave if you're here buddy), but Mark doesn't have this problem either; he also keeps in touch with his fans, to let them know about his next project, a little about what's going on in his life, sometimes, when he's going to take some vacations etc, because he knows what he's doing. and he's one of the most popular youtubers ever

what's their excuse to just even tweet "hey sorry for the delay, the next episode is going to take some time" or something like that?? while we would be thrilled to see new content, we'd appreciate even more honesty. the last video made me feel like being taken for an idiot that would willingly give their money away for some over-priced bullshit because look!! a totally new sanders sides video!!!! not a tasteless ad disguised as actual content at all!!!!!

(and yeah, i know the team isn't responsible for the price of the plushies. i'm still allowed to complain about it bc yeah i guess they're kinda cute, but i'm not spending so much money for this) (i don't even think they ship those in my country anyway)

#sanders sides #ts critical #rant #uuuuh idrk what to tag this #so ask ig???#also as i was writing this fildrong posted a video #to announce his new let's play #THE JOKE WRITES ITSELF HJASFAJFS IM GOING TO KMS

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softestvirgil · 2 years ago

Note

just wanna add my thoughts on the ts crit situation (sorry its a bit of a ramble):

ive noticed that a good portion of the anti-criticism posts i've seen are coming from new(er) fans of the show. it's not always the case, but it seems to be a bit of a running theme.

i dont really have much to say abt the anti-crit stuff other than "mind your own" lol honestly. i cant speak for everyone in the pro-crit tags, but i know you and i have been here a long time. we've been through a lot, us longstanding fans. we've seen so many cursed posts and controversies and bad takes in this fandom. so much drama and unnecessary infighting in this weird morality war that people insist on participating in (dont even get me started on the purity culture issues lmao)

this is not (and never was) a black and white issue, and those of us who have been here a while should be able to vent our bottled up frustrations abt the fandom and the creators and whatever else we damn well please tbh. we've earned at least that, i think. i'm all for the bitch fest, it's healthier than pretending nothing is wrong ever.

tldr: a lot of us have very valid criticisms, and boiling our argument down to "boo hoo its taking too long, i dont wanna wait" is really insulting lmao. also if you don't like posts criticizing your favorite show then you don't have to read them. narrow down who you follow or whatever and let people vent on their own blogs. we've been through this guys, did we learn nothing from the unsympathetic sides era? lskjdflskjdflskd

anyway im having a great time reading the crit content, keep up the good work everyone <3

^^^^

#ts crit #ts criticism #ts critical #my davey wavey #sanders sides criticism

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cvtqr · 4 years ago

Text

babysitter

pairings; eren x reader

content warning; basically just smut, unprotected sex, some degradation, small age gap

notes; in this you are marco’s little sister yeah!! (adopted or biological idk you can decide), college au per usual

“c’mon eren... i’ll owe you one i swear-”

“fine.”

you and eren jaeger did not get along. you were three years younger than him, but yet you were always around. coming into your first year of college, you didn't know anyone except your older brother, marco. the two of you had always been extremely close, resulting into you always hanging out with him and his friends.

that's how you met the infamous eren jaeger.

no other of marco’s friends seemed to have a problem with you, they all adored you. with the exception of eren. he felt like you were a child always trying to hangout with the adults. that made him feel the need to always keep an eye out for you. and god he found it annoying having to watch boys drool over you at every party.

“c’mon eren... i’ll owe you one i swear-”

“fine.”

eren pushed his way through the crowd, away from marco, looking for you.

of course, as expected, some frat boy was on top of you trying to get your number.

“okay! do you want me to just put it in your phone or..-”

you watched as his smile faded while you felt a large hand fall down onto your shoulder.

“lets go brat.”

you were peeled away from the boy as eren dragged you up the stairs of the crowded frat house.

“eren what-”

“it’s gonna get real crazy in a little bit, your brother wants me to babysit you. just stay in my room for tonight and ill take you back to your dorm in the morning.”

you didn't feel like arguing with him right now, you didn't have the energy. you just let him drag you into his semi messy room.

not too long after you excused yourself to the bathroom, you came back to find eren already comfy in his bed.

“you can sleep in here too, just stay on your side.”

you started walking towards the side of the bed, giggling.

“why, thinkin’ of me gettin’ all warmed up to you jaeger?”

he let out a small ‘tch’ as he flipped over to place his phone down onto the bed side table. turning back around, he was faced to your standing backside, unbuttoning your pants.

“wh-, what are you doing...-”

“what? you expect me to sleep in jeans?... don't get too excited, jaeger.”

you made eren’s blood boil. but for some reason he couldn't listen to you, he was getting excited. he thought it was just because he's face to face with a half naked girl... i mean anyone would get a bit excited from that, right? or maybe because he loved the way his last name rolled off your tongue-

his thoughts came to a halt as you crawled under the covers with him.

facing your back to him, you sunk into his pillows.

“i'm doing this for your brother, not you. so don't get any ideas-”

“yeah yeah, night jaeger.”

eren faced the opposite way, pulling the covers over himself more.

“tch-, stay on your side.”

falling asleep in eren’s bed was harder than expected. its definitely been way over an hour, but you could still hear the faint sounds of music playing from downstairs.

as you went to shift in the bed for about the twentieth time, you were stopped by eren rolling over and trapping you into his arms.

“sit still.”

from this position, your bodies were as close as possible to each other. he was right behind you, his arm around you, locking you in.

not fighting him, you listened. being in eren’s arms somehow made it easier to fall asleep. you were out like a light. but eren? he's been up and almost an hour has passed. he was too focused on the way you softly snored, and how good your shampoo smelt.

and the bulge that's been growing in his pants ever since you started unintentionally moving your hips into him

one more rough move into him and you felt a strong grip on your hips, waking you up.

“i thought i told you to sit still.”

you felt him poking into your fabric covered ass, eren’s breath getting shaky.

“eren what-”

“i'm sorry, y/n.”

you felt his grip get looser, but his hands never left your hips.

and you didn't want them too

“can i touch you..., please?”

you felt his hands shift to meat of your thighs, lightly rubbing circles, and you shook your head yes.

that's when his hands started to wander.

up and down your thigh, your lower stomach, up the soft fabric that was separating you from his touch.

his hands shifted from your lower back, to the front of you, prying his fingers down to your clit.

“is this ok?”

you shook your head yes as he started to apply some pressure to your clit, while he rubbed himself against the back of you.

you let eren, the person whom your always fighting with, touch you like this. you were enjoying it a little too much, and he knew that. as he started rubbing circles around your clit, his speed started to increase, while you grabbed onto his wrist, letting out a sweet moan.

“who knew the little bodt was such a slut.”

his movements got faster and faster.

“im nottt- im... ah ‘not a sl-, a slut...”

“you can't even form a proper sentence... poor thing. you open your legs like this for anyone?”

you shook your head no as you squeezed your eyes shut, letting another breathy moan escape your lips.

“then why just me, hm?”

you felt the pleasure being ripped away, as his fingers came to a stop.

“bet you wanted this for awhile. the big brothers good friend to fuck you stupid, yeah?”

“please eren”

in one motion he flipped the two of you over, you landing on your stomach, and him on top of you, pulling your hips up to meet his.

“please what? use your words, little one.”

“want you to fuck me eren.” you mumbled into the pillow beneath you

you felt a weight lifted off your back, before his hands found your hips again, lining you up with him.

pulling your panties to the side, you felt his tip teasing your entrance.

‘ill pull out’ was the last thing you heard before he jammed himself into you.

only giving you a few seconds to adjust, he started thrusting in and out of you.

you softly moaned out his name before finding a grip on the sheets, as his speed started to increase.

“this sloppy pussy ‘s so fuckin’ tight.”

you felt him pull out before ramming himself back in at a rough pace.

“i wanna know who's, fuck-, who's making you feel so good, tell me would you?”

“eren! ‘ts you eren.”

without pulling out, he flipped you onto your back. he's been wanting to do this for so long, he couldn't miss your pretty face during a moment like this.

grabbing onto your thighs, he pulled them up against his hips before leaning down and trapping your lips with his. shifting them down to your jawline and neck, he started to mark his territory. couldn't have any of those college boys all over you anymore, right?

digging your nails into the meat of his shoulders, he felt you start to flutter around his cock.

“gonna cum?”

looking up into his eyes, you swiftly nodded as tears started to form in the corner of your eyes.

“good.”

he brought his head back up as both of your mouths hung open.

you felt his hand move back down to your clit, as your grip tightened on his shoulders.

“cum-, cum all over my cock like a good girl..., pleaseee”

not having to be told twice, you let out a loud moan before creaming all over him, getting all over the bed and down the both of your bodies.

not long after fucking you through your high, eren flipped you back over onto your stomach, as he found his own release.

pulling out he pumped himself as he coated your lower back and ass with his cum. he held onto your hips while he admired his work.

maybe eren jaeger wasn't as bad as you thought.

#aot #aot smut #anime smut #smut #aot x reader #attack on titan #attack on titan fic #attack on titan smut #attack on titan x reader #eren smut #eren x reader #eren jaeger #eren jaeger x reader #eren jaeger smut #eren yaegar #eren yaeger smut #eren yeager x reader

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princeanxious · 3 years ago

Text

Not to be like. Weird about it bc I just have a v interesting perspective but like.

I genuinely adore the blogs that are super encouraging and the ts-small-creator-boost blog(s?). Like absolutely 100% love them and their premise and everything. Yall are fucking awesome. /genuine

But, it is so very telling to me just how far down interactions and activity in the sanders sides fandom have fallen when I kinda get looped into it due to my very low interactions on content posts.

Like. I've been active here 3-years, i have like 11k followers, and i used to post completed content like. Weekly. Because I had the time to make that effort. And those had gotten plenty of interaction at the height of the fandom, sometimes ppl will stumble onto some of my very first, literally years old, comic strips at this point and be like 'your doing great!'

And im sitting here like 'thank you!! Please come look at smth i did recently!! Smth that looks 18x better than that, I promise!!' And just. Idk.

It's a bit amusing to watch it unfold?? bc I'm so friggen happy about the interactions!! They are a bit left field and i dont care!! I love it!!

Because honestly ill take anything at this point. I do get reblogs and comments on my posts but not nearly as much as i used to, and ik its probably part of the shifting culture of tumblr that we're seeing more newcomers think that just liking a post will trigger the algorithm to share it with others(which, its not. You gotta manually reblog posts to do that.)

But like man do I not care anymore if ppl think I'm a small content creator bc im just. So happy to get some extra positive feedback at this point??

#sanders sides #luka rambles #wish there was a way to blacklist my oldest art from getting reblogged w/o the reblogger getting to see my new stuff #cause literally it is a different level of quality and style at this point. i've improved my drawing skills from making #content for three years straight for this fandom alone and it /shows/

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ts-winter-fic-exchange · 3 years ago

Text

Welcome to the first TS winter fic exchange! Information about what this is, how you can participate, schedule, and more is down below. Everything's under the 'keep reading' so you always know it's up to date!

Hello! I'm the mod/person running this. You can call me Virgil (he/him) and find me here on Tumblr @im-an-anxious-wreck

Frequently asked questions:

This event is currently closed!

What Is This?

An exchange of winter themed fics for the Sanders Sides fandom (it's like a Secret Santa just more general winter). You tell me what kind of fic you would like to receive and then I'll match you to another participant who's willing to write it.

How Can I Participate?

This is a fanfic exchange for the Sanders Sides fandom so as long as you can write fanfic for that fandom, you can sign up! We also need betas & pinch hitters (and cheerleaders are always welcome, you just don't need to sign up)!

How Do I Sign Up?

As soon as the sign ups are open (refer to the schedule for the dates), I'll post the link both on discord and on tumblr. To sign up you will have to fill out a few questions in a google form as well as what kind of fic you would like, what you don't want to receive (aka squicks and triggers) as well as what you don't want to write for someone else. For that I'll give you a list of 31 words that you pick from (at least 3, 10 at most). Your matched writer then writes something based on those words (if you pick more than 3, they get to choose which they want to include) and your preferences.

When Does X Happen?

The schedule is detailed below. There will be several check-ins to ensure that if people forget, they'll be reminded or if they drop out, I can assign a pinch hitter in time.

Schedule:

Participant Sign Ups: Open October 26th - November 27th

Pinch Hitter & Beta Sign Ups: Open October 26th - January 16th

First Check-In: Available November 24th, due November 28th (acknowledgement that you signed up & still want to participate). Since the first check-in overlaps with the end of signups, if you sign up during the first check-in, you don't need to check-in

Prompts/Assignment Sent Out: November 30th

Second Check-In: Available December 16th, due December 23rd

Final Check-In: Available January 16th, due by January 23rd (just to make sure that you'll be able to post in the next week)

Posting: January 24th - 31st

(cut-offs for each thing are at [insert date] 11:59 PM CST)

How Does Posting Work?

You post your finished work (min. word count is 2k) on your own tumblr/AO3 and then tag the exchange blog or/and add it to the AO3 collection. With both you have to notify your giftee in some way (tag them in the post, gift it to them on AO3 etc.). If you want you can also post a link of the fic in the self-promo channel on discord although that is not required. Since the surprise is half the fun I ask that you do not reveal who you're writing for until you post your work

Can the fic I write have multiple chapters?

Definitely! There's no maximum word count, only a minimum (2k). Although my personal chapter length recommendation is 500 - 1,500

If I have multiple chapters, do I have to post all the chapters in one day?

Nope! I'd recommend it, but as long as the all chapters are posted and the work is done on or by the last day of posting (Jan 31st) you can spread posting the chapters between multiple days. However, in the author's note, do let people know that the fic is not finished and that it will be completed before or on the 31st of January

Is there anything I'm not allowed to write about in my fic?

Yes, there is a few limitations I've set:

Don't write anything your giftee has said they don't want to receive

No NSFW content

And no remrom, I don't care if you think it's okay or not, but it's squicks a lot of people out and is not allowed in this exchange

How will I know that my sign up/check-in was received?

I'll DM you via platform of choice* an acknowledgment of sign up/check-in within 24 hours of when you sent it in. If after 24 hours you haven't gotten the message, send an ask or DM letting me know!

*platform of choice is what platform you would like to receive your sign up/check-in acknowledgments and your assignment. It will be a question in the sign ups, and can be changed via check-ins when available, or a DM at any time. The current platform of choice options are Discord and Tumblr

Is a beta required?

Nope! Betas are recommended, but not required

I'm a beta, do I have to sign up/why is there the option to sign up?

You don't have to sign up, and can join the discord and wait for someone to request one on the 'request-a-beta' channel. But if you want to sign up then you'll be a part of the beta assignment program

What's the beta assignment program?

The beta assignment program is where betas sign up using the below Google form, writers can DM me asking for a beta, and I'll ask a beta (that's guaranteed to not be your giftee) for the writer

Betas are limited so there's no guarantee that one will be available but please feel free to ask!

(and betas, you can let me know if you want to be taken off the list)

I want to request a beta, but how do I do that/I'm worried that my giftee will volunteer?

You can request one on the 'request a beta channel' on our discord server, or you can DM me asking for a beta and I'll see if one is available

Do you have a discord server for this event?

Yep! Here's the link: https://discord.gg/nnmBYgpXQw

What if my question isn't in the FAQS, or it's been answered but l'd like further clarification?

You can send your question in an ask or DM me your question!

Sign ups/available check-ins:

Participant Sign Up Form: closed

Pinch-Hitter Sign Up Form: closed

Beta Sign Up Form: closed

#sanders sides #fic exchange #secret santa #ts winter fic exchange

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illogicalthinking · 3 years ago

Text

The Burn Within

warnings: Some NSFW language (Remus), blood/ bruises mention, hurt no comfort and self hatred

word count: 1883

authors note: for this fic i used a prompt by @just-another-ts-prompt-blog which can be found: here

hope you enjoy!

Whilst the ‘light’ and ‘dark’ sides preferred to keep their distance from each other, they had to share certain parts of Thomas’s mind. For example, they shared a common area, and the imagination was split into two separate realms, much like Roman and Remus: Whilst one contained multiple castles and kingdoms living in harmony with each other, the other was a prison of living nightmares.

However, this arrangement did not bring them any closer to each other. The light sides tried to avoid the dark sides at all costs. Remus often played pranks on the others such as swapping the sugar out for salt, spiking drinks with inedible products, and stealing utensils.

This made meal times extremely difficult to control: Virgil would hiss and hide, Patton would try and fail to diffuse the situation, Janus would watch in entertainment and Roman was never around to witness. The only side that could keep the sides from murdering each other was Logan.

Today seemed like one of those days.

“Virgil could you please come down from there, Remus did not do anything” Logan sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. It was far too early for this, Logan muttered to himself whilst taking a large sip of coffee from his “worlds best mum” mug.

“He walked in whilst we were making coffee, that’s more than enough reason to hide. What if he put baby powder in my drink again? I’m going to die because of him!” Virgil hissed from his place on the top of the fridge, hoodie covering his frantic eyes.

Virgil had been more paranoid than usual after the recent video. He had fallen back into his old habit of hissing at the other sides when stressed. It concerned Patton greatly.

“Oh please sunshine, there is a higher chance of me fucking a woman with 3 arms than there is me spiking your drink again, I just walked in!” Remus exclaimed as he passed Virgil on the fridge to the dining table.

“Whilst Remus vocalized his argument in a very unprofessional manner, he is right, we have been awake for approximately 1 hour and 15 minutes whereas, by the looks of it, Remus has only been awake for around 10 minutes.” Logan made sure to maintain eye contact with Virgil whilst voicing his opinion to ensure Virgil knows he’s telling the truth. “There is nothing to worry about Virgil, you are safe”

“Thanks, L”

“You're welcome, now please come down from there, it is very dangerous to be sitting in places you are not supposed to be sitting”

After the incident this morning between Virgil and Remus, Logan remained seated in the common room, his back straight against the recliner with his laptop placed on his lap. He was researching content for a Sanders side video they will be filming in the evening. He did not do this in his room due to not wanting another incident like this morning. Logan is the only side that is willing to deal with the incidents, while the other sides (particularly Janus and Roman) are too impatient and often make the situation worse.

Throughout the whole day, Logan continued to research the link between intrusive thoughts and depression. Thomas had recently been showing signs of this mental illness and Logan wanted to bring it up to him via a video. However, there was a small issue, Logan would have to have all the other sides present including Janus and Remus. He needed Janus because Thomas listened to him more than Logan (much to the latter's dismay) and Remus represented intrusive thoughts. It would only be fair to have Remus take part in a discussion about him, even if the light sides had a problem with this.

Happy with his research, Logan snapped his laptop shut. Due to none of the other sides entering the common room after this morning's incident, Logan concluded it was safe to retreat into his room because he was not needed to split up another argument yet.

To Logan's annoyance, it was time to film the video for Thomas' youtube channel. After the events of putting others first, Logan had started to dread taking part in videos. This was because Janus proved he could take his role as logic, and remain loved and respected whilst providing the necessary information Thomas needed.

“Enough of the self-loathing, Logan, now is not the time,” Logan muttered to himself as he sank down into Thomas’s living room. This evening is going to be a long one for all of the sides, especially Logan.

Logan didn’t know how much longer he could handle the arguing.

None of the other sides were listening to his facts or solutions, too busy pinning the blame on each other for Thomas’s current problem. Roman and Remus were currently swords to mace, about to start a physical fight, Janus remained by Patton’s side trying and failing to calm him down before he turned back into a frog and Virgil remained curled up on his side, his hoodie covered the majority of him but Logan could still see him shaking.

Something had to shut them up.

I will shut them up, Logan thought to himself. Logan became alarmed by the sudden aggressive thoughts. He may have a short fuse but he wasn’t usually aggressive, not without guilt eating away at him. However, this time Logan had no guilt attached to this thought and he shivered at the realisation.

This time was different he reminded himself and with that thought, Logan snapped

“Will you all shut up and listen to what I have to say for once!” Logan all but screamed at the top of his lungs, ensuring he was heard over the arguing.

The silence that came after was enough evidence for logan to continue:

“People who suffer from depression often get stuck with a single or even several intrusive thoughts that arise frequently. These types of repetitive intrusive thoughts are known as 'rumination'.”

“The whole point of me organising this stupid video was to bring this statement to Thomas’ attention and guide him with the help of Janus to seek professional help. You all arguing like a group of immature school children was not part of the script, now if you would excuse me I am going to make myself useful for once and leave” Logan huffed, glad to get that out of his system. Even after snapping, the guilt never choked him like it usually would, which disturbed him greatly.

“Logan, wait!” Virgil pleaded, but it was too late.

“I said I was leaving, now fuck off and leave me alone” Logan hissed at him, the guilt still not reaching him.

Happy with this statement. Logan sunk out of the living room back to his room, leaving six shocked and petrified individuals behind.

“What just happened?” Thomas said to nobody in particular.

“I do not know but it’s best to leave him alone, let’s just get this shit show over and done with” Virgil muttered, far too anxious about Logan to care about the video.

Logan what happened to you. Virgil thought.

When Logan rose up into his bedroom he could not hold it in anymore. All of the pent-up frustration from being ignored for months became too much for the logical side, causing him to slam his fists into the nearest wall. However, without realizing it, Logan’s fist struck a family photo of all the sides surrounding a very happy Thomas.

For some reason seeing the shattered photo frame on the floor and the glass sticking out of his broken skin caused something within him to break.

For the first time in months, Logan allowed himself to cry out all of his frustrations.

After what seemed like hours, Logan finally got up from his place on his bed. He noted that his eyes were swollen and his hand was covered in dry blood and bruises. He did not want to get up and clean his mistake, but he knew he had to because the others would ask questions and he did not want that. Logan did not want the other side’s sympathy. It was a little too late for them and Thomas to care about him but he had to stay because Thomas needed him. They needed him.

“Do they need you though, Logan? Come on, you’re just as useful as me right now and you know it.” A harsh voice sneered into the cold room. Logan immediately knew who it was.

“Be quiet Orange, no matter how much Thomas tries to push me aside, I won’t leave because I am his logic, and Thomas needs his logical side.

“Come on Logan deep down you know I am right, let me prove it to you”

“Let’s just say you were correct in your hypothesis, what happens after that?” Logan sneered. He was far too exhausted to deal with this right now, and he just wanted to sleep.

“Let me show you”

“If I trusted you I would be breaking trust with the others and Thomas and I cannot do that. Thomas’s welfare is my number one priority and I cannot cause any harm to them, no matter how much they have hurt me”

“Oh please Logan, Thomas has not given a shit about you since the beginning. Where is your video, Logan? All the other sides have an episode focused on them, even Remus! And Thomas hates the guy! Do something for yourself for once in your life and listen to me, I can make them listen to you but you have to trust me,” Orange whispered to Logan. Logan knew deep down that what orange was saying was correct, he did not just want to admit it to himself. Until now, that is.

“Fine, what do you have in mind?”

It has been approximately one hour since Logan had sunk out of the video, and Janus was getting worried. No matter how much he tried to get a hand on Logan and summon, he couldn’t. Logan was unreachable

The twins were arguing and Patton and Janus couldn't find a middle ground. Finally, they summoned Logan, needing an impartial side. But when he appears, something is different.

He was wearing a long-sleeve dress shirt, much fancier than usual. He had streaked eyeliner and his glasses were different. He was not wearing a tie.

“Logan? What happened?” Thomas asked, hesitant like he almost doesn’t want to know.

Patton had his hand to his mouth. He spoke up after a moment, “Logan, you look like… like a dark side. What did you do?”

Logan’s voice was quiet and soft like if he spoke too loud he might break. “I didn’t do anything. I didn’t try to do this, I-” he cut himself off, taking a deep, steadying breath. “I have become obsolete.” His voice broke on the last word and he clamped his mouth shut.

“No, Logan!” Thomas immediately disagreed. “We need Logic!”

Logan nodded, eyes still trained on the floor. “Yes, you do need logic. But . . . you don’t want me”

And with that, Logan sank out for the second time that night, leaving nothing but a cloud of smoke that soon vanished, just like he did.

The others could not do anything but feel the burn within.

What had they done?

#logan angst #logan sanders angst #logan sanders #Janus Sanders #remus sanders #virgil sanders #character!thomas #sanders sides

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bigassnocash · 3 years ago

Text

Hopeless Romantics

HiHo friends! I mostly wrote this piece for @iaminlovetomhollandmarvel because she's like my one consistent reader. Once again, I'm still fairly new to writing so please be kind, and send in requests for any characters and actors/actresses you want and I'll write for you! I also used writing prompt 707 from @creativepromptsforwriting and its highlighted in bold, there is also a Sylvia Plath poem in here!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Hey Y/N, what're ya doin?" Arvin asked as he walked up to you as you sat reading on the steps outside of the school.

"Not much, just sittin' here enjoyin the warm weather. What are you doin' Arvin?"

"Well you looked pretty lonely over here, so I was thinkin I could keep you company but I can go if you want."

"I don't mind, come sit down I promise I won't bite."

As he sat down next to you he linked his arm with yours to see how you'd react. When you didn't pull away he scooted closer to you, to the point of being able to see over your shoulder.

"Y/N L/N what on Gods green Earth are you reading?" he laughed at the content you were consuming.

"If you must know, nosey josey its a romance book," your cheeks started turning red with embarrassment as he laughed.

"I don't know much but I do know one thing; people do not talk like that on dates."

"I wouldn't know, I've never been out on a date before," you turned your head away feeling shame. 17 years old, and never been out on a date while some girls in your class were out here getting married.

Arvin felt bad, he did know that you didn't go out much but he figured that the most beautiful girl he's ever seen would've been asked out at some point.

"Thats about to change. C'mon Y/N get up, I'm taking you out on a proper date," he offered his hand to help pull you to your feet.

"Arvin are you insane, what would even do?"

"Anything you want. We could go to dinner, a movie, we could go to the library, I could get a picnic together really fast and go to the lake, we can go skinny dipping," he winked at you.

"Skinny dipping is a third date activity young man, I think you know this," you shot back at him matching his cheeky smile, "I wouldn't mind a picnic by the lake, I just need to stop by my house and tell my momma where I'm goin."

"Your carriage awaits m'lady," he help open the car door for you and helped you in.

"Before we do this I need to know, why are you doing this Arvin?" you asked him, very worried about getting hurt.

"Cause its Friday night and I'd rather spend it with the prettiest girl in school than at Church with Lenora."

An hour later after you dropped your stuff off at home and got a picnic and blanket you and Arvin were sitting by the lake looking out over the water.

"Y/N will you please read your book to me? 'ts just I've heard you read in English and I really like your voice. Please?" he was so kind and quiet that there was no way you could deny him of this.

"I won't read you my book but I'll read you a poem, how's that?" he nodded happy with the trade off. As you pulled your poem book out of the small bag you packed, he laid down in your lap looking up at the sky.

"This one is called Mad Girl's Love Song by Sylvia Plath.

"I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead; I lift my lids and all is born again. (I think I made you up inside my head)

The stars go waltzing out in blue and red, And arbitrary blackness gallops in: I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I dreamed that you bewitched me into bed And sung me moon-struck, kissed me quite insane. (I think I made you up inside my head.)

God topples from the sky, hell's fires fade: Exit seraphim and Satan's men: I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead.

I fancied you'd return the way you said, But I grow old and I forget your name. (I think I made you up inside my head.)

I should have loved a thunderbird instead; At least when spring comes they roar back again. I shut my eyes and all the world drops dead. (I think I made you up inside my head.)"

Arvin stared at you in awe. He had never felt feelings like this before. In the moments that you were reading to him everything felt right, as if you wrote the poem for him.

"Y/N that was absolutely beautiful," he gushed to you.

"Aww you don't mean that, now c'mon enough with all this gushy stuff. Its hot and i want to cool down with a swim."

"But we dont have our swimsuits and I thought skinny dippin was a third date activity miss," he was getting real cheeky now.

"Thats very true, but I wear undergarments, and those cover the same amount skin that a swimming suit do. Arvin, do you wear undergarments?" you asked as you started to unzip your skirt.

"You sure about this?" he wanted to go swimming with you more than anything but he didn't want you to feel uncomfortable.

"I've never been more sure about anything in my life Arvin." you were completely undressed, except the matching bra and panty set you were wearing. Arvin was awestricken with you. "Hurry up, I want to swim and your taking forever."

In record speed he took off his jeans and shirt, grabbing your hand and running into the water with you. You guys splashed in the water for a long time, well into the night. At some point you guys just floated, side by side holding hands. No one had ever made you feel the way Arvin did, like you mattered.

"Y/N your shivering, let get you dried off," he helped you onto the shore and wrapped a towel around and rubbed your shouders. "Heres the keys to the truck, you can changed in there. 'm gonna go into the woods to give you some privacy." he truly was the sweetest boy.

Once you both got changed and were sitting in the car, he asked you something you never thought he'd ask. "Will you dance with me? I can turn up the radio and we can dance outside." you nodded your head and lept out.

He took your right hand, in his left and wrapped your left arm around his waist. He placed his right hand low on your back yet high enough to still be respectful.

"Arvin, real talk and I want a real answer from you this time. Why did you ask me out tonight?"

"I asked you out because I've been infatuated with you, but i was never sure to liked me back so I started to flirt with you."

"What? We barely even spoke before today, how did you flirt with me?"

"I mean, I looked at you... sometimes you looked back."

"Arvin I don't know what to say, you could've talked to me."

"I wanted to, so badly Y/N its just that... I didn't want people to get the wrong idea about you because you deserve the whole world and I cant give it to you and people say I'm dangerous and I swear I'm not I just don't wan-"

you cut him off with a kiss. An earth shattering, mind blowing kiss. his lips were so soft and molded perfectly to yours, and he could taste the cherry chapstick you always wore. It lasted forever it felt like. When you both eventually pulled apart he rested his head against yours. "Woman if you keep doing that you're gonna kill me."

"I hate to ruin this absolutely perfect first date but, its past my curfew and I have to be home," disappointment clear in your voice. "All good things must come to an end eventually I suppose."

The whole way home, you didn't leave his side. He even walked you to your door and kissed you goodnight. "Can we go out again tomorrow, ya think?" he asked so hopeful you'd say yes.

"I would absolutely love to Mr. Russell but I don't know if my mom will let me after gettin in so late after I was supposed to be home. Give me your number and Ill call you tomorrow if I can."

He gave you his number and you two parted ways. He sat by the phone all weekend waiting for you to call, disappointment shattering his heart when you didn't. He found you by your locker first thing Monday morning at school.

"Hey, I figured that Id come say hi to you. Ya know, just make sure everythings still good between us?" He had never been this nervous in all his life.

"Yes of course everythings good between us why wouldnt it be?"

"Well you never called, and I got really worried. Why didnt you call?"

"My mom said I wasnt allowed to use the phone because I broke curfew. I promise you I would've called Arvin, I had the best time of my life on Friday. I would do it again in a heartbeat."

"Really, you want to go out with me again?"

"Well, yeah. Of course I do. There's still a second date we have to go on, before we get to the third." you winked at him as you shut your locker and turned around and walking in the opposite direction. Leaving him there, wondering what on Earth he just got himself into.

#arvin russel fic #arvin russel x y/n #arvin russel fluff #arvin russel imagine #arvin eugene russell #arvin russel x reader

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gamergirl929 · 4 years ago

Text

Taylor, I'm Your Biggest Fan (Alex Morgan x Reader)

Anonymous Request: Alex Morgan x Reader where reader is a huge fan of Taylor Swift so Alex invited her to perform at reader’s birthday party as a surprise. Bonus where reader freaks the f out when Alex introduce her to TS

Alex bites her lip to stifle a grin as she watches you dance in the bathroom, your air ponds blasting in your ears, no doubt listening to Taylor Swift.

You dance unbeknownst to the fact that your girlfriend is watching you until you spot her out of the corner of your eye and nearly jump into the bathtub.

“Jesus.” You pant, your hand on your chest and Alex giggles.

“Don’t mind me, continue.” She winks and you roll your eyes, running some water and flicking it at the forward.

“Hey!” She giggles, rushing into the bathroom and wrapping her arms around you from behind, pulling you back against her chest, your arms pinned to your sides.

“This isn’t fair! I’m defenseless.” You pout, as Alex kisses your cheeks and neck playfully.

“I can totally stop.” She rests her chin on your shoulder and you shake your head.

“I mean, you’re the one in charge.” You shrug and Alex grins, nuzzling into your neck.

“You know how much I like being in charge.”

You snort.

“Ohh, I know.”

A sudden knock sounds at your front door and Alex sighs.

“We’ll continue this later.”

“Can’t wait.” You grin, jumping when Alex gives you a playful slap on the ass.

“Hey!”

Alex bites her tongue between her teeth, sending a wink your way before taking her leave.

The second she gets to the door, it swings open on its own, revealing Ashlyn, Ali and Emily, the three women beaming.

“Can Y/N come out and play?” Emily grins, earning a flick on the ear from someone behind Ashlyn, that someone being Kelley.

“Let us in Morgan, we’ve got planning to do...” She says as she jumps up, looking over Ashlyn’s shoulder.

“SHH!” Alex shakes her head, waving her hands. “She can’t know you’re here! She’s in the bathroom!”

“Who’s at the door?” You call from the bathroom, everyone scrambling to hide Kelley, who, Emily decides, to shove in a bush outside of your front door.

“It’s just the usual suspects.” Alex yells and you shake your head, running your hands down your chest to straighten your shirt.

“You bitch.” Kelley growls as she climbs out of the bush, in favor of sliding into the house and running into the kitchen, ducking behind the island in the center of the floor.

You walk into the living room, making your way straight to the kitchenette.

“You here to steal our food again?” You ask as you round the island, unaware that Kelley has crawled around to the other side, looking pleadingly at Alex and the others.

“Depends on what you’ve got.” Emily grins as she moves towards the fridge, the two of you surfing its contents, giving Kelley enough time to make a beeline for the closet, basically throwing herself inside with a crash.

“SHIT.” Ashlyn rubs her elbow, feigning injury, Ali coming over to inspect her uninjured joint.

“I have some errands to run.” You huff. “Everyone loves bills.”

You make your way towards Alex with a smile, gently gripping her hips as you pull her into a kiss.

“I’ll be back later.” You grin, Alex leaning in to press another sweet kiss to your lips.

“So, you’re leaving me alone with these hooligans?” She teases and you shrug.

“Throw a hot dog or something outside and they’ll all go running.” You snicker, earning a flick in the ear from Ashlyn.

“Not Ali and I, I mean, it’s obvious we don’t like hotdogs, we’re married.”

You hear someone bark out a laugh, someone who sounds like they aren’t in the room, but when you turn around you realize it was Emily, the woman ducked down behind the island.

“You’re a weirdo Sonny.” You shake your head, pressing another kiss to Alex’s lips.

“See you later?”

“Of course.” She beams, watching as you grab your keys and head out the door, the woman sighing as she watches you pull out of the drive and head down the street.

“YOU HAD TO FUCKING LAUGH AT ASHLYN’S JOKE!?” Emily yells as Kelley crawls out of the closet.

“I couldn’t help it! It was funny!”

Alex pinches the bridge of her nose.

“Why in the hell did I pick you guys to help me plan Y/N’s surprise birthday party?” She asks herself and Ali grins.

“They’re just here for comic relief, let’s get started.” She claps giddily, Emily and Kelley scoffing.

“Comic relief my ass.”

***

“There’s NO WAY you got her...” Emily snorts, shaking her head, staring at Alex, who simply smirks.

“Oh, I got her, and she’s coming.” She grins and Emily gasps, a hand on her chest.

“Would you be my girlfriend too?” She asks, earning a flick on the ear.

“No, stop it.” Kelley grumbles, rolling her eyes.

“So, everyone is crashing at our house and we’ll all head to the venue early to get it all set up?” Ali grins and Alex nods.

“Perfect! This is gonna rock bitchhhhhhhhhhhhh!” Ashlyn starts to dance in her seat, of course, being joined by Kelley and Emily.

Alex’s phone suddenly rings and she grins, immediately answering when she realizes it’s you.

“Hey hot stuff.”

Alex rolls her eyes, shaking her head, giggling.

“Hi to you too.”

“Are the hooligans still there?” You ask, Alex’s eyes darting around the room as she nods.

“Yeah, they’re still here.”

“HI Y/N!” Emily yells and you snort.

“I was wondering if you wanted me to pick up some pizza.”

Alex hums, covering the end of the receiver with her hand.

“Pizza?”

Everyone nods, though Kelley’s bottom lip juts out in a pout.

“What about me?” She pouts and Alex smiles.

“We may have an extra... Someone...”

“Something tells me I know who...” You chuckle and Alex’s eyes narrow.

“How would you know who?” Alex scoffs, everyone’s brows furrowed.

“I know Kelley’s laugh you know.”

Alex’s blue orbs widen as she stares at Kelley, the defender cringing.

“If you didn’t laugh at Ashlyn’s joke, we could’ve surprised her when she got back.” Alex pouts and you chuckle.

“Well now she gets to eat pizza with us, the usual?” You ask, the forward smiling softly.

“The usual.”

“GET BEER.” Kelley yells and you shake your head.

“I’ll be back soon, don’t kill her while I’m gone.”

Alex sends the defender a glare.

“I won’t... I love you Y/N.”

“I love you too Al.”

***

“MY SAVIOR.” Kelley beams excitedly when she sees you’d gotten her favorite beer.

“Only the best for our Worm.”

“You spoil me.” She squeaks.

You make your way towards Alex, wrapping an arm around her as you press a kiss to her temple, leaning against her.

“Looks like you survived the hooligans.” You grin, Alex rolling her eyes as she leans heavily against you.

“Barely.”

Kelley pops the tab open with a click, sighing as she takes a deep breath.

“My favorite sound.” She hums as she takes a swig from the can, grinning.

You glance at Alex, shaking your head.

“You’re an enabler.” Alex whispers, earning a loud snort.

“I’ll be sure to reveal that in our next couples therapy session.” You snicker, Alex slapping you, hard on your ass.

“Ew, don’t cop a feel in front of us.” Emily groans, the woman groaning louder when you give Alex the same treatment, smacking her on the butt, the woman squeaking.

“No.” Kelley’s eyes narrow, a smirk stretching across her face.

“Put down your beer and give me a hug asshole.” You open your arms, the woman reluctantly placing her beer on the counter before diving on you.

You give the woman a tight squeeze, the woman groaning loudly, squeezing you as equally hard.

“What are you doing here?” You ask, the defender’s eyes widening slightly when she realizes they hadn’t come up with a cover story for her recent arrival.

“Umm... Was just in the neighborhood.”

Your brows arch in question.

“Last time I checked; Utah isn’t in Florida’s neighborhood.”

Kelley gasps dramatically.

“Are you insinuating, that Utah is the SLUMS!?”

Your eyes widen.

“No! No, I wasn’t!”

Kelley pulls away from you with a pout, though her plan was working entirely in her favor.

“I’ll just go back to the slums of Utah...”

Alex rolls her eyes, she Ashlyn, Ali and Emily watching as you try to reason with Kelley, the woman feigning sadness.

Everything was going to plan, well, somewhat seeing as you now knew Kelley was there, but if everything else worked out as planned, your surprise birthday party would go off without a hitch.

***

Alex rubs her hands together eagerly.

Everything had gone to plan, the entirety of the USWNT here in Florida, setting up your surprise party for the evening.

While they were getting that ready, the two of you heading towards one of the fanciest restaurants in town, something Alex had planned even before she’d set the surprise party into motion.

Alex lets out a string of giggles when you stop at a red light, turning towards her, singing Love Story, to the woman.

The song, OF COURSE, was by the one and only Taylor Swift.

The car behind you blares their horn and you growl, the light JUST turning green a hot second ago.

“Yeah, yeah! Blow it out your ass!”

Alex pinches the bridge of her nose, shaking her head.

“What am I going to do with you?” She giggles and you shrug, reaching for and taking her hand.

“Love me? Cherish me?” You snicker, the woman rolling her eyes.

“Yeah, I think I can do that.”

You bring Alex’s hand to your lips, kissing the back of it with a grin.

“I love you Al.” You whisper, the woman’s cheeks flushing as she beams.

“I love you too Y/N.”

The car behind you AGAIN beeps and you snarl, glaring in your rearview mirror.

“I’m about to go all Look What You Made Me Do on your ass.” You grumble angrily, Alex shaking her head.

“Do you have to incorporate Taylor Swift into EVERYTHING you do?”

You shrug, grinning cockily.

“Are you jealous?” You tease, the forward rolling her eyes as she leans across the console, pressing a kiss to your cheek.

“Nope. Taylor Swift has never seen you naked, I have.”

You snort.

“Alright, you’ve got me there.”

You smirk.

“If you play your cards right, you might see it again tonight.” You send her a wink, the woman rolling her eyes.

“Shouldn’t YOU be the one playing those cards?”

You snort.

“But it’s my birthday Allllllllllll.” You whine the woman giggling as she intertwines your fingers, giving your hand a squeeze.

“We’ll see.”

***

The smile that stretches across your face is filled with nothing but the purest form of love for the woman across from you, the woman who’s currently grinning as she fumbles over whatever Italian food she’d ordered, the waitress giggling as she writes it down.

Alex turns to you, eyes widening when she sees you staring, the love sick look on your face making her cheeks flush.

“What?” She asks with a chuckle and you grin.

“I love you.”

Alex beams, the woman taking your hand, fingers intertwining as she presses a kiss to the back of your hand.

“I love you too.”

Your fingers play with Alex’s, the woman’s skin delicate and soft, a complete contrast to the woman’s attitude.

You hold your palm against hers, the woman’s hand just a bit smaller than your own, the woman giggling as she again intertwines your fingers.

“Happy Birthday Y/N.” She whispers and you smile, leaning across the table to press a kiss to her lips.

“Thanks Al.”

You bite your bottom lip to stave off your laughter.

“You still can’t read Italian for shit.” You jest, the forward’s bottom lip jutting out in a pout.

“Shut up.”

***

“Turn here.” Alex points down the street and your brows furrow.

“Yeah, this isn’t how we get home.”

Alex rolls her eyes.

“Of course, it isn’t, I have something to show you, now park here.”

Your eyes narrow as you turn to look at her.

“If this is some role play thing- OW!” You cry out as Alex punches you in the arm.

“It’s not, shut up.”

You bottom lip juts out, your best puppy dog eyes on display as you look at your girlfriend.

Alex leans across the console, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips before she slides out of the car.

“Follow me.”

You chuckle as you too slide out of the car, slamming the door shut.

“So bossy.”

You hold your arm out to Alex, the woman gripping your bicep.

“Lead the way.”

Alex leans heavily against you, a grin stretching across your face as you whisper.

“This is nice.” You kiss Alex’s cheek, the woman beaming.

“It is. Anytime I spend with you is.”

Your cheeks flush.

“Stopppppppp.” You whine, the forward giggling.

“No, you’re so cute when you blush.”

You throw your head back with a lengthy groan, the forward giggling even harder as you pout.

Luckily for her, she’d kept you distracted long enough to get you to the bar where your surprise was waiting.

“We’re here.”

You cock your head to the side, turning to look into what looks to you, like an empty bar.

“Are you finally reenacting that scene from Coyote Ugly that I’ve been asking for?” You laugh, the woman pulling the door open and shoving you inside.

“What’s-

“SURPRISE!!!!!”

You nearly jump out of your skin when the lights flip on, revealing the entire USWNT, a number of them, mostly the kids, with noisemakers in their mouths, loudly honking.

Unsurprisingly, Kelley, is standing on the bar, holding two beers, a number of your teammates on the bar as well.

You shake your head, turning to Alex, the woman’s grin massive.

“You planned this?”

She shrugs.

“Maybe...”

Alex squeals as you lift her into the air, spinning her around.

“I love you so much.” You whisper, the woman grinning as she presses a kiss to your lips.

“I love you too, but the night isn’t over yet.” She winks.

The second you put Alex down someone jumps on your back, that someone being none other than Kelley O’Hara.

“LET’S PARTY!”

***

“I have something else for you.” Alex pulls you away from Tobin and Christen, the two grinning, knowing full well what Alex was about to show you.

“There’s more? You spoil me.” You wink, Alex shaking her head as she kisses your cheek.

“Well, if you thought I was spoiling you before, you’ll DEFINITELY think so after this.”

Your brows furrow, the sound of a microphone being turned on alerting you to the fact that someone is on the bar’s makeshift stage.

The curtain’s part and your heart stops, a familiar tune you know ALL too well starting to play.

You can feel Alex’s eyes on you as you stare in disbelief as none other than Taylor Swift approaches the stage’s microphone.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY Y/N, THIS ONE IS FOR YOU!” The woman beams as she starts to sing, Love Story sounding loudly throughout the bar.

You turn to Alex with wide, teary eyes.

“You got me Taylor Swift?” You ask, your bottom lip trembling and she grins, her arms slipping around your neck as your lips meet.

“I got you Taylor Swift, now get out here and dance with me.”

Alex pulls you to the dance floor, the two of you swaying back and forth, Alex’s arms slipping beneath yours, her hands splayed across your back.

Your hands settle on her waist, your forehead resting against yours as Taylor sings.

“Alex...?” You whisper, the woman’s blue orbs locking with your Y/E/C ones.

“Yeah?”

“I love you. I love you so much” You brush your nose against hers and she smiles softly.

“I love you too.”

The two of you are entirely lost in your own little world, just being together, your eyes shut as you rest your foreheads together.

Eventually, the song ends, though the two of you don’t part, at least until you remember WHO had been singing.

Your eyes widen as you turn towards the stage, eyes further widening when you realize THE Taylor Swift is making her way towards you and Alex.

Alex leaves you, wrapping her arms around Taylor, giving the singer a tight squeeze.

“You’re hugging Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift is hugging you.” You mumble dumbly. “Does that mean I can hug Taylor Swift?”

Alex giggles as she and Taylor pull apart, the women snorting when they see you literal shaking in excitement, a massive grin on your face.

“So, Taylor, this is Y/N, she’s a big fan.” Alex laughs, your eyes still locked on Taylor.

She giggles.

“I-I-I'm Y/N.” You smile, the blonde grinning.

“It’s nice to meet you Y/N I’m Taylor.”

You let out a squeal, wrapping your arms around her, the woman chuckling as she hugs you back.

“Holy shit I’m hugging Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift is hugging me.”

The two of you part, your eyes wide when you again see and realize that you’d just hugged Taylor Swift.

“Oh my god, Alex, it’s Taylor Swift.” You squeal, the forward shaking her head.

“I know, I brought her here.”

Alex grunts when you tackle her, pulling her into a tight hug as you pepper her face with kisses.

“I love you so so much.” You say in between kisses, the woman giggling as she tries, and fails, to dodge your lips.

“I love you too.”

You pull back, simply to look in Alex’s blue orbs before you lean back in, pressing the gentlest of kisses to her lips, the woman melting into it.

The two of you are so caught up in kissing, that you don’t realize Taylor is back on the stage, the music again starting up, a love song that the two of you can dance to.

You sway back and forth, a grin stretching across your face as you whisper in her ear.

“Thank you for giving me the best birthday present of all.”

Alex giggles.

“I had to pull a few strings to get her here...” Alex shrugs, brows knitting in confusion when you pull back.

You shake your head, your lips splitting into a grin that takes up nearly half of your face.

“No present could EVER compare to the greatest gift the world has ever given me...” You lean towards her, your forehead resting against hers.

“And that’s you.”

Alex’s eyes go glassy with tears, the woman closing the gap between the two of you, the kiss tender, loving, a kiss that leaves your lungs devoid of air.

The two of you pull apart, the two of you wear love sick smiles.

“I love you Alex.” You whisper, the woman beaming.

“I love you too, Happy Birthday Y/N.”

The two of you are abruptly pulled apart by someone someone, that someone being Emily, diving on your back, the woman OBVIOUSLY drunk.

“YOU’RE TOO SOBER!” She slurs, your eyes wide as you stare, horrified at Alex, the woman giggling as you’re dragged to the bar by the team’s children, Megan and Ashlyn doing shots together.

“Oh no.” You mumble, Lindsey grinning, along with the other kids.

“Oh, YES.”

Alex makes her way over to Christen and Tobin, the two watching as Megan passes you a shot.

Christen giggles.

“You know you’ll be carrying her home after this right?” Tobin asks, Alex snorting in answer.

“Oh, I know, it’s her birthday so, so she gets away with it.”

Alex shakes her head, watching as you down three shots, one right after the other, grimacing as Kelley passes you another.

“I’ll be sure to remind you of that tomorrow.” Tobin gives her a nudge, earning a mock glare from her teammate.

“Please do.”

***

“WAIT.” You screech hours later, nearly every one of your teammates drunkenly jumping to their feet.

You turn to the stage, gasping.

“IS THAT TAYLOR SWIFT!? TAYLOR, I FUCKING LOVE YOU.”

Alex pinches the bridge of her nose as you rush towards the stage, climbing on it and wrapping your arms around the singer, whose singing is abruptly cut off.

“Oh, Christ.” She mumbles as she moves to peel you off of Taylor.

“Remember Al, she gets to get away with ittttt!” Tobin calls out and Alex groans.

“Shut uppppp Tobin!”

“I LOVE YOU SO MUCH TAYLOR!”

“Y/N LET HER GO!”

At the end of the day, Alex had to LITERALLY carry you to bed, but you had a great time that night, and that’s all that mattered to her.

Alex eventually slips into bed beside you, you who’s dressed, messily in your PJs.

“I love you Y/N.” She whispers and you hum, wiggling towards her and snuggling into her side.

“I love you too Al. Thank youuu for the best birthday ever.”

#uswnt x reader #uswnt imagine #alex morgan x reader #alex morgan imagine

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