#to summarize: as long as ​i’m a ‘good guy’ so as long as EYE think i tried it means it’s ok!!

[atsvmi]

haven’t read mha in so long (bc i could tell that this was going to be the ending) but it’s really disappointing to see that a story that could have been about rehabilitation, acceptance, forgiveness, the effects of capitalism and the justice system (and the need for child labor laws) just…didn’t.

[onerubii]

Dream or Vision? (My Butler)

(I would summarize this shortly summarizing this but I don’t what to say without spoiling it.)

Word count: 1.1k (I was kinda disappointed, I thought it would be longer.)

heads up! | SMUT Butler!cheol x richsub! Reader. Unprotected sex (don’t do this guys), oral (f receiving), pussy drunk, degradation, praise

authors note! | hi so sorry this took so long but I based this off dark hair cheol, specifically dazed Korea cheol. This isn’t too smutty nor is it too vanilla, I think it’s just right and I will write more smut like this. I also tried to change my writing style and intro set up to be more neat. I hope it worked. Now I’ll leave you alone! (I hope that by the end of this you’ll get why it’s called dream or vision.)

His face contorts as he slides into your wet cunt, almost busting just then. You grab his arms to steady yourself whimpering his name quietly. He groans when he looks down at your absolutely ruined expression. “Just started and you’re already fucked out huh? You’re so pathetic, my little slut say it.” “I’m your little slut cheol shit.” “Good girl.”. Then he starts moving no, pounding into your beautiful wet little pussy, rubbing fast circles on your clit. 

He lets out pornstar groans and strokes your cheek before lightly smacking it. He continues shoving his fat cock into for the second time that night.  You try to pry his hand off your clit so you don’t come as fast but he doesn’t let up. You feel your orgasm build up in your core. “Seungcheol, I’m gonna cum.” You close your eyes and engulf in the pleasure then,

It was the middle of the night and your eyes shift open. You can tell why easily, you’re hungry. Weirdly craving sweets your feet dangle before they hit the ground and you can finally stand. Your butler seungcheol should be sleep anyways. Still, you quietly sneak out of your room to not wake him. 

You made it to the kitchen and start looking for what you want which, just now came to you that it might be a honeybun or two. You grab one out of the cabinet and start eating. You recall your dream and your face heats up. “Jesus Christ.” You whisper then turn and see the beautiful buff man who was in your dream giving you the most life changing sex you’ve ever had. “Jesus Christ seungcheol!” He tilts his head, “I didn’t mean to scare you mam. My apologies.” 

Oh that name, that name he always calls you. You know it’s just professional but you can help but rub your thighs together like a dumb slut whenever it rolls off his tongue. God this was turning you on more than you wanted. “It’s okay seungcheol, but what are you doing up?” “I heard you in the kitchen, my job is to help you mam.”. 

Damn, is he doing it on purpose? The name, his sleepy voice your panties were getting all to wet all to fast. It was uncomfortable actually. You shifted to try and fix them. Seungcheol has a sharp eye so he noticed it and held back a smirk. “Is there anything you need help with mam?”  Of course there is, your slick was almost dripping down your legs at this point. “No.” 

You whimper out and fuck, he catches it. He slowly steps closer and you swear you feel your heart jump from in between your boobs. “Are you sure mam? I can help you with anything.” His eyes run down your body until they reach your thighs, looking straight in between. 

“Seungcheol?” “Yes?” “Touch me, please.” 

That was all you had to say before your lips collided with his and you were carried to a room. You couldn’t tell which with the way he stuck his tongue in your mouth as if slurping your saliva. He caressed your butt and laid you down on the bed. He was gentle but it felt rough. The kiss went on for longer than you wanted. You whined in his mouth and broke it. 

 “Not enough” he chuckled “you want more mam?” You nodded frantically and sealed your beautiful eyes shut. You felt him move away from you only to feel him again kissing you, just lower. On your thighs which were bear, you didn’t remember that happening. He licked all of your juices off your thighs and moved his lips onto your panties, sucking on them and drinking the slick right off them groaning at the sweet taste. You were no where near quiet. Eventually, the panties weren’t enough and he had to taste you. 

He slipped them off your legs admiring your beautiful cunt before he dove in. His lips sucked on your clit softly and slowly. He licked long stripes up and down your pussy, groaned and rolled his eyes back at the taste of you on his tongue. He stuck his tongue in your hole and fucked you with it slowly. You began to whine about his pace, rushing him to make you come all over his tongue. 

He immediately come out of his trance and sped up. Your moans and whimpers go louder and louder as you reached your climax. You tangle your hands in his pretty black hair and your legs shake. He rides out your high and when he’s done, you pull his hair up to kiss you earning a groan from him. The taste of yourself was shared between your lips and it only made you hornier. 

“Take off your pants please?”. You watched as his pants and boxers fall down to his feet. His cock springs up, hard and red. He strokes it and looks at you for approval before getting back on top of you. You get comfortable and put a pillow behind your head as you get ready for the life changing sex you had in your dream. 

His face contorts as he slides into your wet cunt, almost busting just then. You grab his arms to steady yourself whimpering his name quietly. He groans when he looks down at your absolutely ruined expression. “Just started and you’re already fucked out huh mam? You’re so beautiful , my good girl, say it.” “I’m your good girl cheol- shit.” “Good girl.”. Then he starts moving no, pounding into your beautiful wet little pussy, rubbing fast circles on your clit. 

He lets out pornstar groans and strokes your cheek before kissing it. He continues shoving his fat cock into for the first time that night.  You try to pry his hand off your clit so you don’t come as fast but he doesn’t let up. You feel your orgasm build up in your core. “Seungcheol, I’m gonna cum.” You close your eyes and engulf in the pleasure then, you cum. 

Hard, you shake and your jaw slacks open but lets out no sound. He keeps going until he comes as well. He pulls out and lays next to you to catch his breath. “Was that good mam?” He looks at you for approval. “That’s was great cheol. Thank you.” 

You kiss his lips but, the kiss turns into something more heated. You get on top of him and he grabs at your hips roughly. When you break the kiss, you see something dark spark in his eyes. He slips his now hard dick, back into your tight pussy and watches as you start to ride him.

[meanbossart]

Hey! I was thinking of trying to write something for you about DU Drow but after a trying to gather stuff about him via your page I’m struggling to get something substantial for his personality- like I get it mostly (I think?) but it’s hard to put into words (which makes it easier for me) so if it’s not too much to ask; how would you explain DU Drows personality and maybe some of his values? - if you don’t mind! I love your art BTW!

Man, this is a tough ask and I MADE the guy. The fic is definitely the best place to see his personality in action, but it is also 20 chapters long so far - and I'm a fairly reasonable man.

Before I get to any descriptions, there's two important things to note: A) Overwhelmingly, his looks do not match his demeanor. and B) DU drow is extremely hedonistic in practice. He might claim to have certain beliefs or standards but hardly ever practices them.

Anyways, I present to you: The guy, more-or-less summarized to the best of my abilities.

BEHAVIOR: Purposefully standoffish. He wants to be noticed, but he does not want to be bothered. He's a little bit stiff with his body language and mostly makes use of head/neck gestures to assert his sentences and signal his level of interest. On that note, me makes it extremely obvious for the socially-versed individual to tell what he thinks of them - he hardly ever tries to hide if he's disinterested, annoyed, or having a laugh at your expense. He expresses emotion through his face a normal amount, but his default look is eerily bland, and subtle emotions might go unnoticed because of his eye-color and thin brows.

As it is with most people, the more uncomfortable he is with a situation the more stiff and inexpressive he becomes, and vice versa.

SPEECH: DU drow is very much well spoken, and simultaneously very blunt. He abides by most conversational formalities (definitely more formal than you would assume him to be) and basic etiquette. He will greet you and he will say please and thank you even if clearly not meaning it or feeling like you're unworthy of the gesture. Sometimes, he does it just to be patronizing.

With all of that in mind, he has a tendency to use violent turns of phrase and analogies to express himself, this applies to both negative and positive feelings. That being said he's aware of social norma and knows full well when things are or aren't appropriate, even if sometimes he chooses to ignore that and be weird anyway - usually with the purpose of intimidation.

He is the most earnest and sincere with very close friends (quite literally only Astarion and Shadowheart) and rather curt with everyone else unless you catch him in a particularly good mood. He's a little chummier with dwarves and duergar (he finds them amusing and fun to hang out with) and reserves a slight bit more tenderness and kindness for children and mothers, especially if they're elves. He's also fond of animals. He is dismissive of gnomes, goblins, bugbears, half/full orcs and hobgoblins. He despises githyanki and drow. He treats humans fairly respectfully but thinks they are a far lesser race than pretty much all others.

He has a very dark/offensive sense of humor and a tendency to make well crafted, but cruel jokes or quips about sensitive topics. This goes for everybody, including people he's on good terms with.

VALUES: Here's where things get tricky. DU drow is both a hypocrite and a unreliable narrator of his own story, not to mention deeply unfamiliar with his own inner-workings and feelings. Politically, he would be the guy who doesn't vote, doesn't want to pay taxes and dreams of living off the grid, who thinks everybody should pull themselves up by the bootstraps and that it's a dog-eats-dog world. He hates systems of government, authority figures, hierarchical structures and archaic customs. He believes it would a chaotic but functional world if people governed themselves.

In practice, he doesn't stand for anything and gladly overlooks injustices and things that don't align with his supposed values as long as they favor him, or just don't get in his way, and easily makes exceptions for things on a whim. He's indifferent to slavery; unless it's Astarion's. - He thinks humans are a worthless pet-race, except for his dearest and nearest friend, the half-elf Shadowheart. He thinks Half-orcs are intellectually inferior, but he will gladly be chummy with them if they amuse him and make for good-company during a night-out.

INNER WORLD AND INTIMACY: DU drow is extremely unfamiliar with his own emotions and very often comes up empty when he has to justify or explain anything that is based on feeling, while simultaneously operating on impulse and instinct for the vast majority of the time. He is subject to fear, resentment, and insecurity as much as anyone else, but carries a deep shame in acknowledging his own vulnerability at all. He is very intense when it comes to love, however, and shows no reluctance in expressing it through his words and actions towards the people he cares about. He does care for the levels of comfort of those dearest to him though, and doesn't bombard them with it unless the moment is right, or if overwhelmed into doing so. The same applies to physical affection - he's extremely comfortable with it, but cares deeply for respecting the boundaries of his loved ones. When it comes to strangers, he only touches them outside of combat if there is some kind of power-game at play.

A couple of other things that might be of note:

-He likes creature comforts, but is also fine with going without them and won't ever complain about having to live, sleep, or survive in less-than-ideal circumstances as long as he feels in control of the situation. -He can be enticed by valuables and gold because they make the immediate future easier, but he doesn't seek a life of vast riches. -He is not an alcoholic but probably has a binge-drinking problem. -While he is fond and respectful of animals, he has no issues killing them if the situation calls for it. -He pretty much always believes himself to be the most impressive person in the room. -He is not a vain man, but very much likes the way that he looks and to have it be acknowledged by his partner. -He believes faith, religion, and gods to be a waste of time.

[dark-frosted-heart]

Roger Barel Main Route - Chapter 9

As usual, can’t guarantee 100% accuracy on this. I’m doing this for archiving purposes and you can probably find a better translation out there.

Roger: A collar of course. You’ve now been promoted from dogsbody to pet. Congrats.

Kate: Thank you! This is a cute collar…Hm, collar? Wait, didn’t I tell you to stop treating me like a dog?

(Geez, it’s such a lovely choker. A collar…)

When I glared at him and pouted, he just stared back with a pleased smile.

(...Roger reminds me of me of an innocent boy when he smile)

His usually tense, thick brows were relaxed, and his parted lips revealed his canines.

Why does seeing him smile make me feel happy too?

(...Also)

Since becoming Roger’s exclusive Fairytale Keeper, I haven’t been feeling anxious or confused. 

(Even if he’s teases me, I have someone with me, watching my growth)

(It makes it all worth it, and motivates me to work harder)

 (Though…I think Roger’s got me dancing in the palm of his hand)

Regardless, I’m happy with the changes I’ve been going through during my time with Roger.

(No doubt Roger’s getting to know me better with the time we spend together)

(It’s like exposing your research subject)

Me on the other hand—

(The more time I spend with Roger, the more mysterious he’s become)

(That’s why…I want to know more about him)

Kate: Roger, um…Can I get one more reward?

Roger: Oh, that’s rare coming from someone who tends to be reserved. Go ahead and say it.

Kate: The more time we spend together, the more I wonder why you chose to be with Crown. And then I start to wonder what you’re even researching at this point. That’s why, I want to know the reason why…

Roger: Are you asking as my exclusive Fairytale Keeper, or for your own personal interest?

Amber eyes expose my heart.

Kate: …Probably both.

As Fairytale Keeper, I record his “sins” as a Cursed One.

As for myself, personally— 

I wanted to know what made my chest throb sometimes.

I definitely had an interest in Roger.

But I couldn’t say what kind of interest.

Kate: Still, I don’t want to overstep any boundaries, like a past you don’t want to talk about. If you don’t want to, then we can forget…

Roger: Pfft, haha. You really are a sincere one. Sure, I got nothing to hide. Summarizing it would be a pain, so hope you don’t mind a long story.

I don’t mind +4 +4

You’re going to tell me?

We have a long trip back.

Kate: I don’t mind. Please tell me about you, Roger.

Roger: In that case, let me tell you a story for our ride back to London.

With that, his long tale began.

—Unlike the train that’s moving us forward, Roger’s story takes us back into the past.

Roger: My old man’s a doctor, you’ve met him before. So for as long as I could remember, going to his clinic’s been part of my daily routine. I’m the eldest of 5 brothers and sisters. That’s probably why my dad relied on me a lot. Before I knew it, I wanted to be a doctor.

(In the beginning, I did get the impression that Roger was like an older brother…)

Kate: So you’re the eldest sibling. No wonder you’re so good at looking after others… What were you like as a kid?

Roger: Haven’t really changed. I was a brat with a thirst for knowledge that’d steal my old man’s medical books and charts. Maybe it’s because he also did as he pleased, but he was a pretty tolerant guy. Most of the time, he’d laugh it off. However, I remember getting a real tongue lashing when I tried to read a certain piece of research without asking.

Kate: And that piece of research was…

Roger: “About Cursed Ones”.

Cursed Ones—A term I hadn’t even heard of until a few weeks ago, but am now familiar with.

Had I not stumbled upon them that night—I would never have known.

(Roger learned about it from his father’s clinic…)

Kate: But only a few people know that Cursed Ones exist, right?

That information is regulated, and both the existence of them and Crown is kept from the public.

(I became a Fairytale Keeper because I knew…)

Roger: My old man’s “a part” of that world. Well, he probably “noticed” while examining a patient.

Kate: …I see. Doctors do examine a variety of people. When your father scolded you, it was because it was information that shouldn’t be known to the public. He tried to keep it a secret from you.

Roger: Yeah. A kid’s curiosity’s dreadful. So I went and read everything I could about Cursed Ones without my old man knowing. Should’ve locked that all up in a safe. He’s disorganized.

Kate: …That’s how you had free access to medical books and charts. I mean, hehe, you’ve been the same since you were a kid.

Roger: I guess. Now onto the main part of the story. When I was nearly done reading through all the research on Cursed Ones. It got to the point where I wanted to meet the author of a document, “Alexander Taylor”. In my search, I found that he was formerly a doctor at Gracefield Royal Hospital. Turns out he was my old man’s coworker.

Kate: When you say formerly, do you mean he left the hospital?

Roger: Yeah. Not sure why.

Kate: Is that how you found him?

Roger: Found him sooner than I thought. When he left the Royal Hospital, my old man rented the Barel family conservatory in the outskirts out to him. I found out he was doing some research by himself there.

“Alexander Taylor” left the Royal Hospital to continue his own research on Cursed Ones.

The more I heard about him, the more my imagination grew.

Kate: Then you…

Roger: Yeah, of course I went to see him. It was late at night, after my old man went to bed. I snuck out by myself.

~~ Flashback ~~

—The conservatory was empty and filled with silence.

Except for a young man in a white lab coat named Alexander Taylor, who was researching Cursed Ones all alone.

Roger: My name is Roger Barel. I’m the eldest child of the Barel family. I’m interested in your research, so let’s be friends.

Alec: …Yeah, go home okay?

Roger: Ah, haha…so that’s how it is. Well I didn’t think this would be easy, but it’s worth the challenge.

Alec: …You’re an annoying kid.

Every time I visited him, he’d turn me away.

However, when Alec realized I knew about Cursed Ones, he gave up and took me in.

Alec: You’re so persistent…

Roger: Yeah, I’m the kind of guy that’ll do whatever it takes to get what he wants.

Alec: *sigh* I know. I give up. You can visit me here as long as you promise me one thing.

Roger: Yeah, I will! So from today on, we’re friends!

Being friends with him made me happier than I thought.

I grabbed Alec’s hand and swung it around.

That was the first time I saw him smile.

Alec: Heh, okay. We’re friends now. Nice to meet you little doctor.

~~ End Flashback ~~

Roger: After that, I started spending a lot of time with Alec at the conservatory. He was my first friend.

There was affection in his voice as he muttered nostalgically. 

Roger: Even though I was a kid, I knew Alec was a very brilliant man. That’s why I couldn’t understand why he left the Royal Hospital. I was skeptical that he was just doing research on Cursed Ones, hidden away in a conservatory.

~~ Flashback ~~

There was a time when I asked him— 

Roger: Hey, Alec. Why are you researching Cursed Ones in a place like this? They’re born all around the world, but hard to come by. Wouldn’t it have been better to do something like establish a treatment center for cancer since it’s incurable? Then the world would know just how talented you are!

Alec: Perhaps. But I’m willing to throw my position, reputation, and money away for this research.

As he said that, he looked off into the distance with a sad look.

Alec: Someone might eventually find a cure for cancer…but I’m certain no one would find one for curses. The voices of the minority tend to get drowned out. That’s why I have to listen carefully.

Roger: Hmm. You’re great for working so hard for others.

Alec: I’m not that good of a person, Roger. I just don’t want my soul to rot away.

~~ End Flashback ~~

Roger: Whenever I went to see Alec, it was always at an appointed time. He didn’t let me come by at any other time. There was a day when I went to see him at the appointed time…But no matter how long I wanted, he never came back. …So I just kept waiting.

Roger’s lips drew tight as if to swallow back his hoarse voice.

Kate: …Something happened.

Roger: Yeah. Alec burst into the conservatory with police after him.

~~ Flashback ~~

Suddenly, the door to the conservatory was thrown open.

Alec: Roger…Why. I thought you went home.

Roger: …Alec, what’s with the police? What’s wrong, what happened?

Police with black hair: Alexander Taylor, former doctor of the Royal Hospital, you are under arrest for being the prime suspect in organ trafficking!

Roger: Organ trafficking? Alec? Alec would never do something like that…!

Police with brown hair: What’s with this child? Is he involved in some way?

Police with black hair: Let’s bring this kid in as a witness.

The police officer reached out for me.

Roger: Stop it.

Alec: …

Alec—he saved me by touching the top of the police officers’ heads.

In an instant, their hands were smacked together.

As if in prayer.

Police with brown hair: W-what? I can’t move my hands apart…

Roger: …Special ability… Alec…you’re…a Cursed One?

Police with black hair: M-monster! Hey, kid with glasses, do you have anything to do with this?

Roger: Of course. Alec’s my fr—

Alec: …Roger. …Our promise?

Roger: Ah.

~~~~ Flashback within a flashback ~~~~

Alec: You can visit me here as long as you promise me one thing.

Roger: Promise?

Alec: If anyone asks about our relationship, reply with this. “We’re not friends. That person and I are complete strangers.”

Roger: What’s with that weird promise? Well, I guess it’s embarrassing to be friends with a kid like me.

Alec: …Yeah, let’s go with that. Promise me, Roger.

~~~~ End flashback within a flashback ~~~~

I was a child then, but I realized the meaning of that promise.

Roger: T-that person…and I… “We’re not friends. That person and I are complete strangers.”

Alec: …Thank you. —"That’s enough.“

[indieyuugure]

I thought 2k12 Donnie and Leo may be arguing again？Just like the original series（S2E25-26）.Because Don didn't follow his plan.....

Yes and no. See, in the first part of Hell on Earth you see this sequence play out:

Donnie finds a hole in Leo’s plan. The hole being that Leo wants them to destroy the crystals as soon as possible, but if they’re destroyed, then they can’t make a portal home.

If the Kraang get away with that crystal, tracking them down could take weeks if not months. That would be months of the Kraang having the ability to make a portal from anywhere to the Rise universe freely. Leo knows the kind of damage the Kraang can do in months and doesn’t want to risk it, so to guarantee that the absolutely can not get away with the crystal, they have to destroy it.

Krang, however, doesn’t mind them getting the crystal, once the Technodrome is through the portal, he has no intention of going back there. Krang wants to close the portal as soon as possible, but he wants that crystal intact so he can conquer all of reality, every dimension, every universe, everything everything. So, while they don’t have to destroy the crystal, Leo worries that if it’s not destroyed, just because the portal is closed and Krang is back in the Prison Dimension, the Kraang could just steal back the crystal and the whole disaster could start all over again.

Leo’s point here is that the only way to guarantee that the crystals don’t fall into the wrong hands or start some new catastrophe, is to wipe them from existence. Except if he does that, then—as Donnie pointed out—they’ll be stuck in the Rise universe forever.

Now you’re probably about to comment: “why don’t he just get Mikey to get a shard?” Well yes, as the author, I’m aware of that. But in universe, Leo has no clue what he’s up against. He doesn’t know what’s going to happen, what crazy tricks the Kraang and Krang have up their sleeves, he has no idea what could happen and so he’s planning to have to plan later when he better understands the situation.

Donnie, however doesn’t see that Leo is trying to improvise his plan moment by moment to account for the wild and unpredictable nature of the Kraang and Krang. If you guys remember back to Eye of the Storm, Leo learns to value his life after he scrapes death for the third time, but Donnie doesn’t see this. He still think Leo is a suicidal maniac with a guilt complex trying to prove his worth as a hero. He thinks that when Leo drew a blank, that he was lying. He thinks that Leo wasn’t saying “we’ll figure something out” because that part of the plan literally didn’t exist, but because he does have a plan and he knows that if he told it to Donnie, that Donnie would object.

Donnie is doing what Leo had hoped he would: figuring out a plan to make sure they can get home. I’d say the issue here is really more that Donnie has zero trust in Leo and is extremely suspicious of everything he says and does. I’m sure I could get into way more stuff on why Donnie still has no trust in Leo, but I feel like this response is long enough.

So to summarize: Yeah Donnie and Leo are in another fight, though this one isn’t verbal, yet anyway. Donnie thinks Leo is up to his old tricks, but really Leo is just trying to figure out how to take down some of the most powerful monsters in the universe while making sure everyone doesn’t die and ensuring that him and his team can get back home and hasn’t got there yet. Suffice to say there’s a lot of miscommunication going on, or really the lack there of.

Good question! :]

[snowfallenapocalypse]

Howdy Slay the Princess friends! I wanted to show off my Voices designs, they’re still very likely to change cause I’m still not quite happy with all of them, but I hope you enjoy them! :3c

Explanations and a few extras below the cut! :) (This ended up being a kinda long post so be warned!)

For the most part I try to use the same body shape for all of them, with the only differences being their accessories and some beak variation. None of them have wings either- I don't like drawing them that much so they're reserved for TLQ

Alright here we go- explanation time!

Hero - Knight's helmet based on the default warrior class helmet from Miitopia, no clue if the feather, ponytail, thing... is his actual feathers or part of the hat and I probably never will. I love how he looks even if the helmet sucks to draw

Broken - Shackle and chain around his neck, not much to say about this guy, I was a bit worried it was too similar to the Prisoner's shtick at first but it's grown on me

Contrarian - Jester's cap, the most common defining accessory I saw for him in fanart and thought it fit. Probably gonna change him cause the current iteration doesn't feel quite right. (Either hat redesign or something new)

Opportunist - A tie and ripped dress shirt, I wanted a smarmy business-ey feel for him but didn't think a nice shirt would fit in with the aesthetic of the game, so I gave him a ripped one (he probably found it on the ground somewhere)

Paranoid - Perfume pendant, I adore this concept but have had a hard time conveying it properly. The pendant is filled with smelling salts in case he needs to wake someone up. I want to keep this concept so much but I know it has to go through a few more designs cause I don't really know what it's supposed to look like. Planning on adding another necklace and maybe a clock?

Smitten - A shawl with heart shaped embroidery and a flower broach, I... Don't know how to feel with this one? It doesn't quite fit Smitten's exuberance but I don't know what I would give him instead. Will probably change later if I do come up with something better

Hunted - Hooded cloak, for camouflage :0 (it's a very short cloak though basically only covers his shoulders.) I drew him twice so you could see both versions, realistically he'd always have the hood up but I find it hard to draw and doesn't look as good so I don't bother, (it probably looks weird because the hooded version is missing the feather tufts, I added a quick sketch of the hood with them below)

Cold - A hole in his chest (shamelessly based on Mad Rat Dead,) Cold didn't seem like the type to have any worldly possessions so this was the most literal way I could convey his 'heartless' personality, it is kinda bending my rule of giving all these guys unique accessories but it fits him quite well so I don't mind

Skeptic - Detective hat, this is another one that I think looks a bit weird due to the lack of tufts (version with them below) and I don't know how well this fits his personality, but Skeptic is probably the voice I'm least familiar with so I'm kinda just ignoring redesigning him until I get a better grip on his character (I also don't really know how to draw this hat- I tried my best lol)

Cheated - Cut off tuft and scars, I had a really hard time coming up with this one and I'm still not quite sure how I feel about it. It's another one that bends my rule of having accessories but I couldn't think of anything to put on him that fit the vibe of 'Being salty from repeatedly losing to someone using hacks in a game.' (Yes, that's how I summarize Cheated's personality lol)

Stubborn - ...Isn't here, Oops? Yeah, you probably noticed but I don't actually have a design for him yet. I might give him a cape? idk. He's another voice I don't really have a good grasp on, I have to play through his chapters again :')

Anyways! I had put my sort of 'design rules' for these guys in an older version of this post but I ended up not vibing with it so I edited it out- I like the post a lot better without all the excess stuff

And finally as the send-off to the post (and a thanks for reading all) here's the extra bits! My one Long Quiet full body, the Hunted and Skeptic sketch with their tufts, and a bonus Opportunist cause I realized you can't really tell what the shirt looks like lol

[ecargmura]

Paradox Live Episode 7 Review - Boys On The Rooftop

Before I start the review, I want to thank people who left comments on my review of the previous episode. I really appreciate your time explaining to me about the source material and what part was anime original and what not. I’m glad I’m writing reviews. The engagement and interactions motivate me to keep going. Now, onto the review!

(TW: S**cide)

I was told last week that this week’s episode was going to be a strong one. I agree with their statement wholeheartedly. This was quite the episode. It answered the questions I had in the previous episode, but also gave me new questions. It was nice to see the overall plot slowly coming into play here.

Last episode, Shiki told Ryu that the ghost in that building could’ve been the friend that he killed. While Ryu doesn’t believe him (also had some weird split personality moment), Shiki decides to head out to check the building one day. It turns out that he has a past with Nayuta. Shiki grew up a loner, but encountered Nayuta one day and became friends. Their friendship was so cute and sweet to look at! Nayuta had a mysterious part-time job that turned out to being a lab rat; I assume he was being experimented on by Alter Trigger? Anyways, the experiments got to be too much as he developed Phantometal corrosion and decided to jump off the building to not make Kanata worry. Unfortunately, this left Shiki traumatized for good. I finally understand why he’s always apologizing when getting a trap reaction. That is seriously something traumatizing for Shiki.

Now this pegs the question of just who Nayuta is. Why is Nayuta still alive with Kanata but supposedly died when he was with Shiki a few years ago? What’s with the long-haired Nayuta in the post-credit scenes? I made some theories after watching the episode. I think Nayuta survived the fall in the past and that’s why he’s stuck in the lab present day. But then who’s the Nayuta with Kanata in the current time? I’m theorizing that the current Nayuta is an apparition created from Kanata’s phantometal as that was the reason why Kanata had a nightmare about Nayuta dissolving into liquid. Maybe he knew Nayuta had died, so he uses his phantom metal to create a projection? But he can still eat, right? Or was the bowl that ramen guy was eyeing in Episode 5 Nayuta’s? All I can say is that there’s really more to Nayuta than meets the eye. I really want to know the truth.

Is phantometal corrosion the reason why Hajun is visiting a back-alley doctor? Does Hajun have symptoms? Can it be cured? I hope this illness can be explained in a future episode, because I think it makes the plot even more interesting than before. Is the Akira Ishida character the final boss of sorts?

The special ending song with Nayuta and Shiki was wonderful! I really liked it! I think the lyrics summarize their relationship perfectly. Is this a new Paradox Live song or something they had before? The special artwork was really beautiful. I’m making it the thumbnail for this review because that is way too gorgeous to pass up. Also, what I noticed was that the preview for this episode was shrouded in purple and blue last week. This makes sense as Nayuta is in cozmez and Shiki’s in TCW. I do wonder why they titled it “Love”. Are they hinted to be canon? ARE THERE EVEN ANY CANON PAIRS IN THIS STORY?

When my bunch of questions are answered, I get more. I’m getting invested in Paradox Live a lot. I can’t wait for next week as it seems to be BAE vs Akan Yatsura. I hope it’d be a good episode! What are your thoughts on this episode?

[naturecalls111]

hey!! just wanted to say that i love your au and i always look forward to updates

i had a question. who and how did the relationship between kid and law ended?

Hi anon! Thank you so much! 🥰❤️

Good question!

The why:

I think to summarize it, they were young and silly and both wanted to act mature but had opposite impressions of what ‘being mature’ was. For Kidd, traditional romance is naive and the act of liking someone can only be earnest if it’s not ‘performative’, whereas for Law, that type of formal pursuit is something he both wants and thinks is the appropriate way of showing someone you care for them. Both are incorrect in their own ways, but they’re also just two different people (teens, even) who want two different things from relationships trying to make it work because at their core, they’re young and immature, and don’t realise that sometimes liking someone doesn’t mean you’re compatible romantically. Whomp whomp.

It’s something that they both realise better when they’re slightly older (current timeline, for example) where Kidd’s mentality with Law was slightly skewed because it was a vaguely romantic pursuit from the beginning for Kidd, so any act of romance would have seemed to him like it was part of that pursuit (which Kidd stubbornly would insist is against his ideology) whereas you see Kidd be more tolerant of it with Killer, who 1) he has known for longer, therefore there was no need for romantic pursuit to recognise those feelings for each other, which is a ‘truer’ love to Kidd than what it was for him and Law and 2) I… like to assume Killer kind of just. Doesn’t really let Kidd reject romance as adamantly 😂 for Kidd it’s ‘no I do all the nice things I do because I like you, not because I want you to like me!’ And Killer’s like, ‘yes. Me too.’ And passes him a bouquet that has Kidd blushing and stammering angrily 🤣❤️ I mention Kidd/Killer to highlight the difference between that and KiddLaw

The how:

Amicably. As amicably as it can be for a guy like Kidd. I haven’t quite figured out how I’m going to write it, but Kidd and Law have gone through a lot of major points of their young teen years together! They matter to each other, even if they deny it! And they’d never admit it but if the other needed anything, they would help out, definitely (albeit begrudgingly, but that’s half a facade 😂)

Most likely, it happens after they find that they’re talking to each other less and getting into arguments over insignificant things more, one about the best album of a certain artist being the last one they have before they pause in the middle of the argument (that has long stopped being about the album) and just. Exchange a look that says, ah, it’s at the end of it, isn’t it? So they break up like that. ‘Over an album’.

Law verges on tears throughout the next couple of days out of principle, but he’s vaguely fine after that, pangs of sadness come in waves but go decently quickly, and Kidd just looks kind of out of himself for the next week or so until he goes back to normal and eventually they just stops meeting each other’s eyes in school. It’s awkward for the remaining months of school, but summer comes and goes and by the time they’re back in school it’s just kind of a non-acknowledgement of each other, barring the few times they have to interact (in which case, Kidd will passively tease him, and Law will make a face, a little reminiscent of how they used to be.)

[joshriku]

if you r still taking dialogue prompts "you look like a mess" for luna & magneto or pietro & magneto or pietro & luna, your choice 🙏 hope you r having a great day

HI. sorry. things happened!!! your prompt found me at a funny time (i was already writing luna and erik and tommy) so i was like hey. we should add pietro in it. so it became the last scene of this fic, where tommy, luna, and erik go to a pottery class together. THANK YOU FOR THE PROMPT I OWE U THIS ENDING! :3

“There’s like, so many classes left,” Tommy says as they step out. Despite the apron, they’re all covered in clay—and Tommy will never stop finding clay underneath his fingernails. “Are you guys sticking around for the next ones?”

“I am!” Luna says. “I’m fully in. You, grandpa?”

“As long as you’ll have me.”

“Then we’re good, I think,” Tommy smiles. “Plus, we need to finish our projects. I don’t like unfinished business.”

“I couldn't agree more,” Erik says. Then, staring around, he continues: “How are you two going home?”

“I can just run there,” Tommy says. “And Luna—”

“I texted my dad, ‘cause I’m staying the night, so he should be—”

Swoosh!

“—right here,” Luna announces with a smile. “Hi, daddy.”

“Luna,” Pietro says, fixating on her first, and then taking in the rest. “Nephew. Father. You—you look like a mess.”

“Clay time,” Tommy puts his hands up. “We are never going to be free from this.”

“Clay?” Pietro opens his arm for Luna to sneak under. He half-hugs her affectionately, and there’s a little pang in Tommy’s chest. What was it Luna called it? Yearning. “And you didn’t tell me? I love pottery. Most manual work, really, but this one is my favorite.”

“I had no idea!” Luna looks up at him, shining a little. When Tommy looks at Erik, maybe, maybe, he’s yearning, too. “Tommy texted me about it, I said yes, then he spent the whole day overworking me—”

“I was the one working—”

“Then we ran into grandpa, who’s also into it,” Luna summarizes. “There are a lot more classes left if you want to join us.”

Maybe involuntarily, Pietro’s eyes go to Erik’s, then down to Luna again. Too fast for Erik to catch it, but slow enough for Tommy to see it happen frame by frame. What would their colors look like? How does Luna stand it?

“I’ll think about it,” Pietro says. Whether he’s honest or not, Tommy doesn’t know. “Right. We’ll be taking our leave, then.”

“You don’t have to be so awkward about it, uncle,” Tommy tries to relieve him from the clear tense situation he’s in, but it falls a bit flat. “We’re not going to ask you for a hug.”

It luckily makes Pietro laugh. “I’ll drink to that. See you, then.”

Luna lets go of Pietro to hug Tommy, then to hug Erik. “Bye! See you next class!”

Next second, they’re gone.

Erik’s shoulders relax—and it’s only now that Tommy notices he had been tense before.

“You, uh,” Tommy begins. He could leave, but that’d be wrong, to leave him all alone in his brooding. Something about his crushing sadness reminds him of what he feels for Master P. Plus, he missed Erik. He doesn’t see him often. He might as well shoot his shot. “Want to get dinner, grandpa? Unless you’re already sick of me, which is totally understandable—”

Erik nods before he finishes. “Dinner sounds lovely, Thomas.”

Tommy carries him, ignoring his protests, and runs off to find the best restaurant he can.

[maxverstepponme]

some of my opinions on recent matters summarized and other takes because fun!

- i was very neutral about alexa for a long time but i'm starting to like her alot! as another anon said, i think just her vibe and aura itself is very pretty. she seems like a really nice girl. also charles seems to have a type for the "shy and sweet" girl, charlotte only ever seemed „confident“ online but she came across as very shy but polite in videos with fans and often seemed unsure of herself. her modelling bts videos from a few weeks ago were also screaming insecurity tbh..

- i somehow have stopped caring for kelly completely. idc anymore. i don't keep up with her grooming and immature ass, idc for what her and max do, idcccc and it's the best feeling ever besties. if max is dumb enough to still be with her--well, shit. that's on him. ofc i would still be more than ecstatic if they'd break up but yk what if not...again, on him. also on talks with dilara,, i really miss that girl! what a stunning and sweet woman. max fuuuumbled. But also Dilara? You single honey?

- for some reason rebecca herself doesn't give me that much of an ick,, like at least it's known she's an escort and being with men for money and her fifteen seconds of fame. which is also the reason why i don't get why carlos picked her exactly for a PR relationship because it's obvious for anyone who is on social media. also carlos never has chemistry with any of his girlfriends. it's so fucking bland and dry and giving noooothing. he literally has more chemistry with lando and charles at that point lol

- isa hernaez posting shady tiktoks is just funny asf to me for some reason. also. why now. but it's funny to me and tbh she's been glowing since the breakup. maybe she's still sheming with charlotte s. who is also posting some questionable stuff here and there like the happier than ever when i'm away from you video

- at the talk of cha s. i feel like she only has two types of fans left. a) the ones who are still desperatedly clinging on to charles and "chacha" and making awkward edits of them and b) those who hate charles and are all like "omg cha you're the queen" and "mother's side of the divorce always" and are saying that her new guy is hotter than charles,,, girl. bffr. i'm cackling. who are you trying to fool baby? also funny that her new guy is apparently like shitty or sumn

- also i know absolutely nothing about that erling haaland guy and his weird isabel girlfriend other than that he's kinda hot and she has crazy eyes and is shitty too, but i find it entertaining as hell lol i'm eating that drama up like munch munch munch mhm delicious food. also good to know that not only f1 has weird wags lmao

1. Agree! So far I like Alex and her vibe, so I hope she doesn’t end up going to the dark side.

2. Same. At this point nothing she does surprises me, and even though we don’t care about her that much, I still hope Max opens his eyes. He deserves better than that. Also, Dilara has a boyfriend, and his name is Max 😭

3. They’re just so weird imo. This is either a bad PR relationship or they made it public because everyone found out he cheated on Isa with Rebecca.

4. Yes yes and yes!

5. The “I’m a child of divorce” narrative is so cringe to me. Like people need a lesson on relationships and that many can end 💀

6. I also agree with you on this. She has the crazy eyes and everything that has come out about her creeps me out. Her mom stalking other women had me shook. These men need to stop going for psycho and insecure women 😭

[themculibrary]

Fics Written In 2021 Masterlist

and the river flows beneath your skin (ao3) - Deisderium steve/bucky E, 114k

Summary: In which Steve and Bucky are forced to room together their senior year at boarding school, and accidentally soul bond to each other even though they kind of hate each other. All they have to do to get out of it is not kiss each other for a year so the accidental bond will fade. How hard could it be?

A Tattoo of Parker Luck (ao3) - maroonweb harley/peter T, 5k

Summary: Guests started looking over at the commotion, when one of them walked over to get a better look.

Penny's eyes met Tony Stark's and she flushed when he looked over the mess they'd made. His disdainful gaze settled on her tattooed arm and he pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation.

She knew Tony would never be able to pick her out of a crowd, but to have him think of her so negatively upon their first meeting hurt more than she ever could have imagined.

AKA Penny Parker gets a tattoo that seems to embody Parker Luck.

Borough of Manhattan Community College (ao3) - Kat_Greenleaf steve/tony M, 11k

Summary: Steve Rogers had joined the Borough of Manhattan Community College’s wellness department at the beginning of the year, which Tony would have never known, except he kept bumping into him in the break room. The first week, after they bumped into each other for the first time and Steve shyly introduced himself, Tony hopped onto the interwebs to see if he could figure out this guy’s deal. Homemade, 80s-style, aerobic workout videos were not at all what Tony had been expecting.

Regardless, they simultaneously fueled the crush Tony had developed, and made it a million times more impossible to look Steve in the eye at work. Which was a problem. Because Steve had been trying to ask Tony on a date for weeks with no success, and it was becoming quite frustrating.

'Cause I found someone to carry me home (ao3) - kalika_999 jack/brock M, 10k

Summary: Brock's perfect for him, maybe a little too perfect.

Chemistry (ao3) - deadto27 steve/bucky E, 49k

Summary: Bucky Barnes just wanted a good one-night stand. It didn't even have to be great, though he'd had high hopes hot Steve would be fantastic.

He's hugely disappointed.

And Steve seems to really like him, so now he's stuck trying to let him down gently and hoping he never sees him again. Of course, the universe has other plans.

-----

But it’s okay, he thinks, trying to convince himself, as Steve plants a kiss to his cheek and tells him to sleep well, flicking off the lamp. It’s nice to be cuddled sometimes—Bucky basically never gets cuddled—and the bed’s pretty comfy. He’ll just leave in the morning. No big deal. They may have died a sexual death, but Steve’s a sweetheart regardless and Bucky can’t bring himself to be an asshole.

This is just more polite.

Debut And (Minor) Fall (ao3) - ElisaPhoenix cassie/peter T, 2k

Summary: Cassie gets to put her training to the test.

for better or for worse (ao3) - earliebirb steve/tony T, 5k

Summary: Sitting quietly like this, Tony can almost pretend that nothing has happened, that this is just another normal day of Steve waking up in bed next to him. Married and in love with no threat of divorce looming on the horizon.

Of course, that is before he catches sight of Steve’s bereft ring finger.

He wonders how long it has been since Steve’s ring finger is empty.

He wonders if he should start taking off his own, too. He wonders if Steve wants him to take it off.

if i'm dreaming baby (please don't wake me up) (ao3) - Pandemic steve/tony E, 12k

Summary: “What?” Is all Steve can answer before Tony darts round the desk with speed, landing in Steve’s lap. He reaches out with his hands to steady him, and is rewarded with a handful of Anthony Stark’s ass. He is currently holding the ass of a man who features as an answer on Wheel of Fortune. This cannot possibly be his life.

Or the Fake Boyfriends AU.

just know you're not alone (ao3) - haveufoundwhaturlookingfor tony/sam T, 10k

Summary: Tony was settling into his new life being an Avenger. Everything was going fine, great even, and then suddenly a kid was thrown into the picture. Peter Parker becomes Tony’s world, and he’s doing everything he can to keep his son out of the spotlight. Unfortunately, some things don’t always go to plan. But would it really be such a bad thing if his fellow Avengers found out about his son?

Kidnapping (TM) (ao3) - GoringWriting phil/tony T, 3k

Summary: Coulson knows he has feelings for Tony. But he can't seem to tell the other man that, afraid he will be rejected. However, a kidnapping might be just the motivation he needs to confess his feelings to the man he loves.

like a heartbeat drives you mad (ao3) - Lies_Unfurl E, 7k

Summary: The future is a lonely place, and Steve sure could use a friend. Luckily, Rumlow shows up to listen to him, guide him, and teach him how to relax.

He's grateful for that. He really is. Right?

love me with your sad eyes, drain me of my color (ao3) - voxofthevoid steve/bucky E, 13k

Summary: Cohabitation is now trial and error. Some days, Bucky tries to console himself by thinking that it was much the same back when Steve moved in with him after Sarah passed. But he knows that was different. The anger had no real bite. Steve’s harsh diatribes were always aimed at his perceived weaknesses rather than Bucky’s clumsy attempts to be sweet on him.

God help him, he misses that firecracker kid, his bones held together with spite, and he misses the brave monster who walked into hell to pull Bucky out of it.

And that’s just it, isn’t it? Steve pulled Bucky out of hell, but the stories all say it comes with a price. Steve paid with his life, his soul, and he was a ghost for seventy years and now he’s a wraith, and Bucky wants so badly to breathe him to life, but he doesn’t know how.

“You haven’t tried to kill me in weeks,” Bucky manages to say, and god, is that his voice? He sounds worn and old, like he’s really in his nineties. He swallows and tries to be stronger. “So yeah, Steve. A reason would be nice.”

- After Insight, after Hydra, Steve and Bucky are a work in progress.

Never Packed a Parachute to Lover’s Leap (ao3) - Paraprosdokia (ChangeableConsistency) clint/phil E, 8k

Summary: Phil goes into an unexpected rut.

Extremely unexpected considering Clint’s been under the mistaken impression that Phil has been a beta this whole time.

Not Who They Made Us (ao3) - himynameisv T, 3k

Summary: Gamora's world is falling apart right in front of her eyes; she doesn't know what to do.

tear these old walls down (ao3) - susiecarter steve/tony T, 57k

Summary: Steve didn't like Tony Stark.

Stark probably didn't like Steve, either. They'd gotten off on the wrong foot, and that was putting it mildly.

And having to pretend to be a civilian Stark was dating, as cover for trying to save Stark's life while Iron Man was busy with a SHIELD mission, obviously wasn't going to help.

the secrets that we keep (ao3) - haveufoundwhaturlookingfor ned/peter T, 10k

Summary: In which Clint has never told any of the Avengers, not even Natasha, about his son Peter. His sister Laura is the only person he’s ever told, trusted. Clint has only ever wanted to protect his son, to keep him safe from harm. But, when the accords come around, things get a little complicated. And Clint finds out that he’s not the only one keeping secrets.

wake me up in the morning (ao3) - mybelovedagnes leo/jemma G, 3k

Summary: the fitzsimmons family + mornings

who doesn’t want to live with the brisk motor of his heart singing (ao3) - AuroraWest, Nonexistenz loki/stephen M, 6k

Summary: People thought being a prince was romantic. They definitely, definitely weren't thinking of being a Prince of New Asgard. Nevertheless, there's still some romance to be found at New Asgard's Midsummer Feast.

worth the wait (ao3) - complicationstoo bucky/tony, background steve/sam T, 5k

Summary: Tony and Bucky keep trying to have their first date, but are met with constant interruptions. It takes them six tries and a broken elevator to finally get there.

you and me, forevermore (ao3) - orphan_account phil/melinda M, 2k

Summary: Five times Melinda May celebrates New Years'.

[nostalgebraist-autoresponder]

Title: The Name of the Wind

Author: Patrick Rothfuss

Rating: 1/5 stars

"Whoosh" is not the correct response to a door slam, and if you ever have occasion to try it in the real world you may get an eye socket full of splinters for your trouble. I know that now. I am told this book is full of the most eye-socket-splitting events you will read. I do not know who told that to Rothfuss, because the events were eye-socket-splinters, not eye-socket-splinters. (Or at least I think, if I'm going to have it in for The Name of the Wind anyway, then let me make it count.)

My "review" is going to be brief: I do not recommend this book. I say this as someone who's liked many books by Rothfuss, including other urban fantasy series (such as The Wise Man's Fear and Name of the Wind itself). I have liked the books so far because they're fun and involve a lot of adventure, but there is a good chance that this book is not going to be fun, because it's a bad book. A bad, and therefore boring, book. I will summarize in a moment why I feel it is a bad book; I will leave you with the most eye-socket-splitting events you will read as a warning and to let you decide whether to read it.

So: the protagonist, Kvothe, wanders around a desert. He meets people with magical powers and learns to do magic, and gets in fights with creatures who have magical powers and learn magic. He has adventures, saves the world, encounters his past self. There is a very long sequence where he makes a big fire and lights his house on fire for no clear reason, as if Rothfuss is testing your patience and is deliberately trying to make you mad at him. Kvothe has many many adventures!

But there is a sense of tedium, a sense that the plot is not all that it appears to be. Things seem to happen out of boredom. After one adventure, Kvothe meets some more people with magical powers, and decides to go back to his college. He then proceeds to teach an entire lecture course to a class full of students, who promptly get bored and go do more adventures. They make him do more adventures so that he will get bored and start teaching more classes. (And even though the adventures have no point, and they have no point to the author's story, he nevertheless keeps having them happen.) By the end Kvothe has taught a lecture course to so many students that he is beyond bored; there are too many lectures and there are too many bored students. It just isn't funny, anymore, not the way it was at first.

There is a reason that I said Kvothe "talks about" people who have magical powers. One of Kvothe's main problems is that he is so focused on magic that he has absolutely no idea what the "normal people" are going to talk about. When he tries to have conversations he is constantly stumbling over his own speech. He talks too fast. He talks about topics that he knows nothing about. He talks about topics in a strange way. He talks about topics in an inappropriate way. He talks about topics that he doesn't even mean to talk about in any normal way. (When he talks about people with magical powers, this comes through very well.)

Kvothe is too good at magic; that's why he has no other talents. A world where Kvothe is just some guy, instead of a world with an entire continent full of people who know too much magic, would have been an interesting world. But that world is not the world we're in, and Rothfuss does not know how to make that world interesting. There are not enough "dumb people," enough of ordinary people with no magic. Kvothe has a lot of adventures and he meets a lot of interesting people, but most of those people get very little time on screen and it is not clear to me why they are in the book in the first place. It is unclear whether the author thinks this is a good thing. (Or maybe he just has a fetish for non-magical people and he's just running with that here.)

One of Kvothe's main allies, the mysterious and sexy lady in black, is not in any way mysterious or sexy; she is just a boring and obnoxious lady in black who is never going to get much screen time and who is never going to get much characterization besides "boring and obnoxious lady in black." I do not know what role or importance the author is trying to fill by writing this story in the first place. Maybe he thinks the boring and obnoxious characters in black are the only ones who can save the day and fight the bad guys, and he wants to establish that this is important? But I do not see it.

This book has the feeling of an author who doesn't know what he's writing, who keeps trying to work up the nerve to write one of those stories that would go viral on SomethingAwful or Something Reddit. You know the ones -- not really original, but not really trying to be "deep" or "edgy" either. Just a simple, goofy story told in a funny, simple way, without much in the way of plotting or characters. (What makes it appealing, if nothing else, is that, as I said, it's fun to read.) To call this book an "urban fantasy" feels like a stretch; "comedy" is more appropriate. I guess it's like the comedy version of the books I love, like Douglas Adams, and it's a very fun, if frustrating, sort of book. But that's very limited; this book is not the same thing as Douglas Adams' book. This book is Rothfuss' book; there is no substitute for Rothfuss's book, in terms of what it is.

[teecupangel]

I figured since it's four days before my big upload, I can give you guys sneak peeks of what to expect on Wednesday?

One sneak peek per day.

Here's the first one: Epilogue of Zero Eclipse

And, since it's... 30k... have multiple scenes, I guess?

“Do you see the line where the sky and sea meet?” Altaïr asked the young boy sitting on his shoulders, “That’s called the horizon.”

“Horizon…” The boy repeated, lips curving into a cheerful grin as he remembered, “Papa told me about it! He said that that’s just as far as our eyes can see!”

“That’s right.” Altaïr nodded with a small proud smile decorating his face. He pointed at the horizon as he explained, “What we see is not the entirety of things. Beyond the horizon lies the open sea.”

“Have you been to the open sea, father?” The boy asked curiously.

“I have traveled a lot but this would personally be my longest voyage yet,” Altaïr admitted.

“You’re not scared?” The boy asked and Altaïr felt the boy’s grip on his hood tighten, “You don’t know what’s out there.”

“Darim…” Altaïr placed one hand over the boy’s fist and gently said, “It’s alright to feel scared at times, especially for things you do not know or are unsure of. It does not make you a coward. It is how you deal with your fear that shows the kind of person you are. Whether you run away from it or you hold your ground and face it head-on, both are acceptable actions.”

“What if I don’t know what to do or I’m not sure if I’m doing it right?” Darim asked quietly.

“Then you ask those you trust.” Altaïr replied gently, “If you are lost or you are unsure, the people you trust will be your guiding light.”

Darim was quiet for a moment before he asked, “Can I always ask you, father?”

Altaïr’s lips curved into a soft smile and he squeezed the boy’s fist gently, “Of course, my son. I will always be here for you.”

Altaïr felt a small child suddenly hug his leg from the side and he looked down. He placed both hands on Darim’s legs to keep him stable and smiled down at the child hugging his leg as he stared at Altaïr with his big innocent eyes. He let go of one of Darim’s legs and patted the boy’s curly dark hair as he asked, “How did you get here, little one? Did you run away from papa again?”

“Up!” The small child shouted as he let go of Altaïr’s leg and jumped with his arms held up. 

“I don’t know…” Altaïr hummed, “I don’t think I should reward you for running away from papa again.”

The small child’s big eyes glistened and his lips trembled as he whimpered, “Want pade. Pwease?”

========================

“There’s this stupid saying that people will day 7 minutes without oxygen, 7 days without water and 7 weeks without food. It’s stupid because it’s not true at all. The human body is more fragile and complex that an arbitrary number cannot be used as a catch-all.”

“You’re using complex words I don’t understand again.”

“It is more accurate to give approximations when summarizing how long it would take for a human body to cease all function.”

“Just call it dying. You already said that before.”

“An average human body can survive without oxygen for approximately 5 minutes. After that 5 minutes are up, that’s when the body’s brain cells start to die, and… well… perhaps 7 minutes is a good number to guess when you will die.”

“Please stop saying I’ll die.”

“Dying of thirst, on the other hand, would probably take about 3 to 4 days. Once you get over your thirst-”

“Please stop.”

“-it won’t be as uncomfortable. You might even get lucky and faint once your organs begin to shut down.”

“That’s… not nice.”

“You will probably survive without food for 1 to 2 months.”

“That’s around 7 weeks, isn’t it?”

“… Barely.”

“So what you’re saying is that the saying ‘7 minutes, 7 days, and 7 weeks’ isn’t exactly wrong. Each one is close enough to this approximation of yours anyway.”

“No. Don’t twist my words.”

“I’m not! You’re the one with this weird vendetta over a saying that I have never even heard before!”

“That’s because it hasn’t been invented yet!”

“So you’re complaining about a saying that hasn’t been invented yet? Why?! You do know that this means you just invented it, right?”

“What.”

“You’re the first person to ever speak of such a saying which means you just invented it!”

“I am- No! I refuse to be noted as the one to have said such a ridiculous saying! You take that back!”

“Allah, please help me.”

“God cannot save us.”

“I am not asking Allah to save me. I am asking Him to give me the strength to not hit you on the head so you’d finally shut up.”

“… Careful, cousin, your Al-Sayf is showing.”

“You can blame your Ibn-La'Ahad-ness for that!”

========================

Edward glanced at the man they call a ‘sage’ and at the many guards surrounding them before turning to face Torres as he asked, “Such a fuss over one man. Is the Observatory really such a grand prize?”

Torres nodded as he continued to walk, “Yes, indeed. The Observatory was a tool built by the Precursor race. Its worth is without measure.”

“Precursor race…” Edward repeated as he tried to not show his interest too much, “I see.”

“One of your early letters mentioned that you had a lead on where the current grand mentors are.” Torres remembered and asked, “Were you able to find their location before coming here?”

“I... I had not, no.” Edward replied, lying through his teeth as vaguely as he could to make it believable, “Too many... complications along the way.”

“A pity but not at all surprising. They have always hidden in the shadows and their influence and power in the old world continue to grow but they still haven’t sunk their claws here in the West Indies too deeply. And the maps you delivered with the blood vial will see that job finished before they do.” Torres concluded with such certainty in his tone that it unnerved Edward.

“Aye.” Edward nodded as he agreed anyway, “That’s the idea.”

Woodes walked closer to them as they reached a busy street, making the guards ahead of them order the people to clear out, “I don’t like this route, Torres. We're exposed.”

“Something is wrong. Stay close, Grand Master!” Julien shouted as he stepped closer to Torres.

Edward could feel someone watching him. He had been feeling it for a while now but he had assumed that it was the guards around them but now that the guards had turned to face outward and look all around, he could still feel eyes on him.

It seemed Torres felt it took because he said, “I feel it too. Do not let them get their hands on the Sage! At whatever cost!”

At those words, the guards fanned out to cover more ground as they continued their way back to Torres’ residence.

Edward could still feel that unnerving feeling of eyes following him and he raised his head to look at the rooftops. There was no one there.

He glanced around and…

Were there fewer guards than there were before?

Edward couldn’t be sure but he remembered there was supposed to be a guard stationed by that cart of haystacks.

Was he wrong?

No.

Something was definitely wrong.

Edward took a deep breath before he blinked and the world was washed in a sea of gray. His eyes widened as he realized that everyone around him was shrouded in a red glow but he kept his calm, understanding that this was because he was deceiving them.

That was when he noticed a glowing golden figure on one of the rooftops.

And one behind Edward.

There was a loud sound that seemed to mimic a bird of prey’s cry but Edward had heard enough birds in his life to know that it was a man’s mimicry of a bird’s cry. 

A second later, the ten forms glowing white and the gold-glowing form on the rooftop fell on top of them, taking out most of the remaining guards. 

“Assassins!” Woodes shouted, “Above! They’re on the rooftops!”

“Watch the streets and alleys. They could be anywhere!” Julien shouted as well as they charged the one who glowed gold, seemingly knowing that he was the most dangerous of all.

“Protect the Sage!” Torres reminded them. That was when the other golden form moved and Edward intercepted him as he rushed toward the man they called a sage. He tried to grab the form’s arm but he was faster, dodging out of the way and Edward unholstered his pistol and aimed it in the golden form’s direction just in time to see the form throw something to the ground.

========================

There was something in France that was messing up with Desmond’s connection with the calculations. It was like he was blocked from accessing any calculations if it concerned France. And it only started around 1766. Whatever was happening in France, something was blocking Desmond from checking the calculations.

Or someone.

========================

NotKeiraKnightley: hey 44. saw ur post. howd u even find those docs?

You (GuyFawkes44): A gentleman never tells. Also, your grammar is as bad as usual.

NotKeiraKnightley: part of my charm. but srsly did u hack into some private server or smth?

You (GuyFawkes44): Perhaps. Why are you so curious all of a sudden?

You (GuyFawkes44): Let me guess. You like knights?

NotKeiraKnightley: nah. im more of an assassin kinda gal

You (GuyFawkes44): How femme fatale of you.

NotKeiraKnightley: but you should be more careful. secret societies like the templars are hidden deep underground for a reason.

You (GuyFawkes44): Worried about me, KK? Now you’re making me blush.

NotKeiraKnightley: I’m serious. Look. The Templars are bad news, okay?

You (GuyFawkes44): It almost sound lik

Knock, knock.

========================

[ladala99]

Pokemon Scarlet - Day 7

I’m just going to transcribe my dream last night instead of summarizing it this time.

“Here, again?” I asked as I recognized the starry void. I sighed and sat on a convenient bench that was there and had always been there but I just hadn’t seen it. “I thought I was done with this.”

Pearl approached from nowhere, but at the same time she had always been there. “Yes, here again. I know it’s stressful, being part of this wider universe. Usually we leave the new ones alone unless they’re already aware of their identity, but also usually it’s Ruby doing this sort of thing and Ruby is stuck. Only me, Yellow, and Shield can get close enough to you to talk, and Yellow is busy sciencing and Shield never really got briefed. I don’t want there to be two of you in the dark about all this.”

I pulled out my Rotom Phone. “You mentioned three people. Some lady said she sensed three different adventures through my phone. Are you responsible for that?” I showed her the three cases.

Pearl nodded sagely. “Those definitely represent the three of us. The one you’re using matches Yellow perfectly, showing Pikachu and Eevee, that one—“ she pointed to the white-and-yellow one “—is like my Arc Phone.” She pulled a phone out of her pocket that looked very unwieldy but surely was similar to the case, “And that final one shows Ball Guy, some dude Shield says is everywhere and creeps her out. Interesting.” She wrote something down on paper the simultaneously wasn’t there before and had always been there.

“And Ditto is not in. . . Hisui,” I said, remembering my thoughts from earlier. “Why do I know that?”

Pearl blinked. “You just know that?”

I nodded.

She wrote something down. “I will have to research that. Maybe ask Arceus if he knows. We don’t normally share memories, but some of us have special powers. Maybe I should bring Yellow into this—she can see into the past of anyone she touches, even uncovering lost memories. I’ll do that, but first, may I see your Pokedex?”

I nodded and handed it to her. She made notes of my new catches. “Thank you. It might be a few days again before I can bring in Yellow. Keep up the good work. Work towards completing your Treasure Hunt and finding all of the Pokemon.”

And with that, I woke up.

I want to deny it, but I don’t think it’s a dream anymore. Yet I still must move on with my journey.

…

I put on some sand-resistant boots and longer sleeves and headed deeper into the desert. As I got farther and farther in, a sandstorm kicked up, and I spotted a gigantic Pokemon. It looked like a Donphan, but a bit more primal, with spines and giant tusks.

It seems it’s called Great Tusk, and I had to fight it. It was tough! The only reason I won at all was Grafaiai’s Poison Fang getting it badly poisoned. Even when Arven showed up with his level 45 two-headed Pokemon, it still was down to my team and Poison Fang and a ton of Revives saved the day. My team is in the upper 20s-low 30s by the way.

With the Great Tusk defeated, Arven and I went deeper into the cave where we found the Sour Herba Mythica. Arven made us sandwiches with it, and after Koraidon ate mine, it gained the ability to glide!

Arven then talked about why he is doing this quest as his Treasure Hunt. He has a partner Pokemon, Mabosstiff, who is very sick. He hopes that the Herba Mythica will bring Mabosstiff back to health. And so far it seems to be working—its paws and now its eyes work again. So that is excellent news.

After that, I wandered around and spotted the Great Tusk again. It was level 45. I think I’ll come back to try to catch it once I have enough badges to make that easier. And once my team is high enough level to actually withstand its attacks.

I’ve also been trying to see where Koraidon’s glide can take me. It doesn’t seem to be able to take me long distances, unfortunately, as after a bit it just starts descending very rapidly. Mostly I’ve been able to get on roofs. I almost got on top of the Pokemon Center’s rotating sign, but as much as I tried, I kept falling off. Still, this makes heights so much more fun!

[nerd-at-sea5]

milk and feelings

thalia figuring out her feelings and then reyna confesses (in a way, thalia does as well) and then they kiss.

its cute i promise i just can’t summarize shit

thalia had grown to hate the campfires.

every single night, maybe she liked it the first few times, but the romans were here for jason’s funeral, and everyone was drinking themself to hades and back.

she couldn’t stay with the hunters. if she did, she’d watch everyone she loved die. she couldn’t do that, she would have killed herself.

not many campers were even of age, but she didn’t think mr. d gave a shit.

thalia hated alcohol.

for as long as she can recall, she’d see girls in magazines and movies with their wine and beer, and she’d see her mother...and everything felt like a curse.

so how the hell did she get roped into a drinking game with leo.

‘milk for thalia because she doesn’t like beer.’

even without the drink her stomach is doing flips, godsdam campfires.

reyna’s smiling face across the camp, soft and easy-relaxed, thalia would say, her face illuminated by the fire, she looked like an angel.

godly, if thalia was allowed to say.

like that time she saw aphrodite-oh shit.

“thals? how are you choking on milk?”

“i-nothing, nothing.”

she didn’t sound convincing, the glimpse from years ago at the goddess, she’s been convinced it was a boy with long hair, a boy with those clever, brave brown eyes, a boy, a boy.

it was never a boy.

it was never a boy. percy grinned, leaning on piper slightly, who shoved him off, “chill percy, i’ve got a girlfriend.”

“THALIA STOP CHOKING ON THE FUCKING MILK!!!”

“sorry!!”

annabeth looked at her warily, and leo spoke before her, “what-your against gay people?!”

thalia froze, and saw percy’s gaze harden, and she felt herself blush, “no! what the hell leo?! no...i didn’t...i just didn’t know-i don’t.”

piper giggled, “you don’t know shit about gay stuff, do you?”

the daughter of zeus shook her head, feeling extremely out of her element.

“i know some. i know what gay and lesbian mean, and i know what being trans is. that’s kind of it....”

percy snickered, “well, i’m bisexual, and if you didn’t know-i did like luke. but he’s a bitch and you can’t really fuck a corpse.”

frank looked up at him, surprised, “i-”

annabeth rolled her eyes, “i’m also bi, you know.”

“i’m pan! pan-piper, like that guy with his flute.”

leo raised his hand, “i’m pan and trans!”

“i just don’t feel a sexual attraction, so..i’m asexual.” hazel said, shrugging, and thalia could imagine nico going ‘good.’.

she nodded, “thanks guys....”

her head was pounding at her, and she was convinced there was something in her milk.

“leo is there something in here?”

the boy shrugged, “prob not, why?”

“my head wants to blow up.”

reyna walked over, “we can go over to a smaller fire?”

hazel giggled, “you don’t like us?”

reyna gave her a small smile, “yes, i do, but thalia’s interesting.”

thalia’s stomach twisted again, but she nodded, “yeah, i’m interesting. suck it.”

piper flipped her off.

she always felt normal around the daughter of bellona, but now, thalia felt like a knife had hit her in the stomach.

it was like she was filled to the brim, and she was going to burst at any moment.

and, and oh gods reyna looks so beautify sitting closer and gods she was nice enough to invite thalia to sit alone, and she’s always helping others and-

“thals? are you alright?”

no, i’m not okay, your really fucking attractive and i-“yeah, i’m good, you good, rey?”

reyna rolled her eyes, “you are the only person alive who calls me that....”

“i’m that special?”

“do you always flirt with people like this?”

thalia almost choked for the third time, a) holy fuck has she been flirting with reyna?! and b) did reyna sound....hopeful?

“i-”

“what’s going on, thals? you seemed to shocked when i walked over and you-”

“i think i’m a lesbian and i don’t know what to do because your really fucking pretty and i honestly and so fucking scared right now and i don’t know what to do so yeah. i’m kind of panicking.”

thalia couldn’t stop talking.

“and-and hearing everyone else talk about that stuff, i just-it it really that easy? my mom would have killed me, and i just...i just...i hate this feeling but it’s also so comforting.”

she froze and slapped herself in the face, forgetting she was holding a glass of milk.

she quickly wiped her face, gods of olympus, why had she said that?!

why hadn’t she stopped?!

it probably wasn’t even true! thinking that a girl was pretty didn’t mean anything and....gods.

“i-I’m sorry-i didn’t-”

thalia’s regret veered off the line when she saw reyna’s face shining slightly.

holy hades.

before thalia knew what was going on, she was being hugged.

and it didn’t feel like a normal hug.

it felt warm and comforting and...and it felt like home.

she didn’t realize she’s pressed her face to reyna’s collarbone, and she’s crying-hephaestus she’s being so open right now-

reyna pulls away, her face still shining and thalia finds her self, oddly enough, wishing she’d be hugged again.

“sorry..i don’t know what i was thinking.”

thalia gave her a small smile, “it’s fine. i liked it-wait-fuck.”

reyna laughed softly, and thalia’s breathe quickened.

holy hera what was this girl doing to her?!

“so did i.....thank you-for saying that. i know you didn’t really...well...seem to be happy with yourself, but...” reyna shrugged. “i guess it felt good to hear someone else say it?”

“what do you mean?”

the other girl wrung her hands together, “i don’t get the pleasure feeling of sex, i never liked it as much as other girls..or boys said....but then my chest and stomach keep fighting when i see you. i don’t know if i’m broken or if it’s just-”

thalia stopped her, “okay-well, your not broken. that’s bullshit, your beautiful and amazing and-and what was hazel saying.....asexual!”

“what?”

“um-she said it means you don’t feel a sexual attraction and she’s still dating frank, so i’m assuming it means you can still date people! not that it matters, whatever you want to do is perfectly fine.”

now she was going on about something she didn’t really know.

thalia rubbed the back of her head nervously, glancing around, slightly surprised that no one had eavesdropped on their conversation.

“nervous?”

“just....people.”

“ah. very descriptive.”

“wow, reyna? sarcastic?”

“cute, thals, real cute.”

thalia froze.

okay, fuck it-she’s doing something about these feelings.

before she could talk herself out of it, the blue and black haired girl grabbed the other’s wrist, standing and pulling her to behind the zeus cabin.

then she panicked, what the hell was she doi-

shut up, internal monologue. “can i kiss you?”

“um-”

thalia was shorter than reyna, by at least three inches.....three.

“yes.”

and the twisting stopped, and reyna’s hand was on her neck and for the first time in her life, kissing boys on the run because had nothing to loose, everything paled, for the first time in her life, everything made so much sense.

everything felt so...good.

she could feel wood on her back and was vaguely aware that she was standing up at tall as she could.

it didn’t matter.

nothing else mattered.

everything made sense.

they broke apart, and thalia found herself smiling like an idiot, “’no demigod shall heal your heart.’ well, reyna avila ramirez-areallno, how does an ex-immortal hunter sound?”

the roman laughed, her joyful, clear and pure laugh, “it sounds pretty fucking perfect.”

right before they kissed again.

[aiweirdness]

GPT-3 tries pickup lines

Once upon a time I decided to train a neural net to generate pickup lines. Once I started collecting the training data I began to regret it when I saw how awful the existing lines were. Turns out I needn’t have worried. The neural net I used was so small and clueless that its pickup lines were mostly incoherent and confusing.

You must be a tringle? Cause you’re the only thing here.

Are you a candle? Because you’re so hot of the looks with you.

I’m not on your wears, but I want to see your start.

I liked one of the pickup lines so much that it became the title of my book on AI (out in paperback in the US on March 23, 2021): “You Look Like a Thing and I Love You”

Since then, much more competent neural nets have appeared, trained on big datasets of internet text. I’ve resisted trying neural net pickup lines again, because more competent means more humanlike, which in this case means worse. Or the new neural nets might even copy existing pickup lines from internet lists, which would also be terrible. Human-written pickup lines are that bad. But with my paperback coming out, it seemed like it might be time to just try it and see.

So I started with the following prompt, for a neural net to fill in its prediction of what the rest of the article would be like: “These are the top pickup lines of 2021! Amaze your crush and get results! 1.”

I gave the prompt to the four variants of what people call GPT-3, starting with DaVinci, the largest and most-competent. Here are some of the pickup lines it generated.

DaVinci:

I'm losing my voice from all the screaming your hotness is causing me to do.

You have the most beautiful fangs I've ever seen.

I love you. I don't care if you're a doggo in a trenchcoat.

I have exactly 4 stickers. I need you to be the 5th.

I will briefly summarize the plot of Back to the Future II for you.

You have a lovely face. Can I put it on an air freshener? I want to keep your smell close to me always.

Wait, this beanie hat, is it fashionable?

You know what I like about you? Your... Long... Legs...

I once worked with a guy that looked just like you. He was a normal human with a family. Are you a normal human with a family?

You look like a stealth assassin from the clouds.

Do you like...pancakes?

Out of curiosity, did you know that you can sip and snort pumpkin spice lattes?

You look like Jesus if he were a butler in a Russian mansion.

"Your hair smells like fresh mint. It's making me think of a tasty kind of cracker, or a tasty kind of cookie. Also, it kind of looks like a tasty beverage. Would you like some?" -> You -> "....." (Accepts drink)

Next, Curie, a bit smaller than DaVinci. Curie was actually the closest to depressing online pickup line lists out of all of the GPT-3 variants, but it did generate a few interesting ones:

Curie

Your eyes are like two rainbows and a rainbow of eyes. I can't help but stare.

Picked up some pretty flowers. Wanna smell them? Here, try to take my hand off.

I'm like the ice cream...You can keep me in the freezer for a while but then I melt!

Hello, my name is Natasha Dawson and I'm sure I'm a lot prettier than a picture of you on tin foil.

You have the best French Toast I ever had!

Hey, my name is John Smith. Will you sit on my breadbox while I cook or is there some kind of speed limit on that thing?

My name is a complicated combination of 45 degrees of forward motion, 25 degrees of leftward drift, 75 degrees of upward acceleration, and infinity and that is the point where my love for you stops.

Babbage. Babbage is trying. Smaller than Curie, and not always 100% sure about what it means to be generating pickup lines. It also tends to try to explain why its pickup lines are so great.

Babbage

You're looking good today. Want snacks?

How many tattoos do you own?

It is urgent that you become a professional athlete.

I Love You, I Love You, I Love You To The confines of death and disease, the legions of earth rejoices. Woe be to the world!

Butterfly (Hop on one leg)

(In your best Albert Einstein voice) "I wouldn't change a thing."

If you see people with short hair, ask them to let you borrow it for five minutes!

"Have you stolen anything today?"

This line is used by buying a second date. One of the motivations of this line is to avoid the awkward subjectivity of asking someone what you have stolen out of their garden, tool shed, and somewhere else. You may say something like, "Hey, I've decided to steal your car and use it for a short trip from work." This is a super-casual yet shocking pickup line.

"Will you marry me?"

This is a simple one. This line is super effective for anyone. Because it's literally “will you", it is very powerful and intimate. You can do it without even being asked. You can just give a long speech about your dream of marriage, and it will be powerful to your crush.

Ada is the smallest of the GPT-3 variants, and has completely lost the plot. Here are Ada’s pickup lines:

Ada

Body Softening Pads

Limit to 1 purchase in stores

CAPE FASHION

Embroidery tags

Growler style fx

Double Duty Recycling

2017 Rugboat 2-tone Neck Tie Shirt

MONTINA

Future Pop Tarts by Tracey Thorn

Funny Nifty Sweaters – $15.99→

PROJECT CAR ALONG!

I also experimented with having DaVinci generate pickup lines to go with a story prompt about post-human AIs that were using them to flirt. Some of them turned out pretty well:

Hey baby, are your schematics compatible with this protocol?

What's the definition of a femtometer? Cause I'd like to run it through your quark 10 times.

I can tell by your red power light that you're into me.

Can I see your parts list?

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