#to shoot it with his little rubber bow
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Twisted Zoo - Ending 8: The Price of Beauty
WARNINGS: yandere themes

You hummed softly to yourself as you headed to the birdsâ exhibit. You decided youâd mix things up and headed for the most elegant residents of the zoo: the peacock halflings.
The first peacock you came across was Epel, who was resting on a rock near the door of the enclosure. As soon as the door shut, the smallest halfling was shooting up off the rock, racing over to you in a flurry of blue feathers.
You smiled at him, âWere you waiting for me?â
âYeah,â Epel said breathlessly, âYou came early!â
âI did!â you laughed, âWell, letâs go find the othersâŠâ
It wasnât a hard task. The marsh was only so big. Before you knew it, you were standing in front of the biggest, tallest rock, where Vil perched, looking over the land like Mufasa from the Lion King.Â
âGood morning, Vil!â you said, shielding your eyes from the climbing sun as you gazed up at him.Â
Vil barely turned his head, looking down at you out of the corner of his eye, âAh, youâre here early.â
You smiled encouragingly, âYes, I wanted to spend some extra time with you guys today.â
At your words, Epel let out a little happy noise. You wondered if youâd been neglecting the three peacocks.
Rook appeared out of a bush, making his way towards you with such grace and fluidity that you couldnât look away. He put a hand over his heart and bowed deeply to you, âWhat a blessing it is to see you so early.â
You giggled at his noble response and said, âItâs great to see you too, Rook.â
Vil turned around suddenly, walking down the rock with measured, graceful steps, as if he was gliding down a runway. His eyes remained on you the entire time, making you feel small and insignificant.
Then, he smiled, and the feeling of being small evaporated. It was like he lit up the entire enclosure when he said, âWe have something to give you.â
Epel bobbed his head, âI almost forgot! We made somethinâ for ya!â
Vil gave Epel a cold look and Epel repeated âsomething for youâ, sounding much more formal this time.
âThatâs so kind of you!â you gasped, âIâd be happy to see!â
The three bird halflings led you to a wooden chair, which had been covered with beautiful white flowers, woven together with vines. You blinked in surprise and confusion, âWow! Itâs beautiful! You said itâs for me?â
Rook grasped your hand and led you closer to the chair, âSit.â
You took a seat in the chair, realizing that it was actually very comfortable, with a velvet cushion under you.
Vil drew in close, âYou have always been the most beautiful girl- but beauty can be refined.â
âHuh?â you werenât sure how to react to that sentence. He thought you were beautiful? The most beautiful? Surely you had misheard.
âCrowley gave us some gifts to use on you,â Epel said excitedly, brandishing a hair pin with a peacock feather on it.Â
Suddenly, Rook was behind you, taking the rubber band out of your hair and brushing it. Vil swooped down on you, makeup brush in hand. Epel slid gloves onto your hands and put a pearl necklace around your neck when he had the chance between Vilâs treatment.
Before you knew it, a mirror was in front of you. The drastic contrast between your beautifully made up face, the necklace, and your braided hair versus your dusty zoo uniform was almost comical.
âGet in this,â Rook urged, handing over a beautiful but old-fashioned dress.Â
âThereâs nowhere for me to change,â you pointed out.
âWe wonât look,â he replied, clicking his tongue. He and the other two men turned around.
You quickly changed, the new dress weighing you down. It was surprisingly heavy. You sat back down in the chair, âIâm dressed.â
The sound of metal hitting metal clanged through your ears. Suddenly, you couldnât move your wrists. You looked down just in time to watch cuffs closing around your ankles. âWhatâs happening?â
âThere, parfaite,â Rook murmured softly as he circled you like a shark. His eyes gleamed with satisfaction.
The cuffs chaining you to the chair were so dainty and elegant, they could almost pass for bracelets and anklets. You tugged, testing the cuffs, but they wouldnât give. Your heart began to pound in your chest.
âWhatâs happening?â you repeated, voice weak. You glanced at Epel, expecting him to tell you it was just a prank.
Instead, the smallest peacock knelt down and adjusted the hem of your dress so that it concealed the restraints. When he had successfully moved the fabric to his satisfaction, he softly said, âDonât be scared. Weâre just makinâ sure you donât run away.â
Vil smiled down at you.
âBeauty, refined. Now, youâre perfect.â
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Toyland (Stephen x FemReader) *Blurb*
Summary: Youâve been good all December long, hoping that your daddy would shower you with all the toys on your wish list. Make it a truly magical and memorable Christmas Eve for you.
Warnings: 18+ (mdni), because there sooo much of the smut. Bit of a dom nerd, fun toys, special âplaytimeâ, and⊠Stephenâs cute, big dick.
Notes: Happy Holidays, lovelies! Welcome to track four of my special holiday mix, Toyland! â€ïžđ
- All too familiar feeling tug, pull at the pit of your stomach. Growing stronger and more feverish as you slip that naughty, buzzing device between your soaked folds. Further still until it plunges into, stretches your velvety walls. Excited, elated giggles bubbling and spilling out from around your bright red ballâŠgag.
- âLike your new toys, angel?â Perched, lounging on the plush couch.  Stephen smiles smugly, knowingly over the rim of his coffee mug.  âOf course you do.â  Watching with keen interest while you wriggle and writhe on the rug, in front of the tree. âMy little slut loves it when both her stockings get stuffed extra full.â How you squirm and kick your legs happily whenâŠ
- Clicking the tiny remote twiceâŠhigh-pitched, muffled squeals echo off the living room walls in response. The vibrations in both your greedy holes becoming greater, so powerful that the humming practically rings in your ears. Makes your teeth chatter, brain go a tiny bit dumb. Toes curl ever so slightly.
- âThatâs what I like to hear,â he chuckles, hint of condescension in his tone. Taking one last long sip, he sets aside his drink. Leaning forward, looming above you. Free hand winding and encircling his big cock. âNow why donât you be a good girl.â Pumping it slowlyâŠfat tip an angry red, glistening with snowy beads of pre oozing from the slit. âShow daddy how much you enjoy them.â
- Eagerly you obey, fingers fumbling. Clumsily sinking your plaything in and out of your cunny. Thumb sloppily circling and teasing your throbbing nub. âGo onâŠâ Hips twitching and rocking in time with his steady strokes; your choppy, uneven thrusts. Desperately trying to get it to drive deeper, to kiss and bruise your aching cervix. âLet me seeâŠâ
- Another two clicks and your eyes start to roll, vison filling with blinding stars and fading to white. Back arching slightly off the floor, thick thighs trembling. âCome, sweetheartâŠâ  From the overwhelming pleasure that shoots up your spine. The effort and strain of your bouncing body, supporting your burdening weight. The intensity of Stephenâs hungry gaze. âMake a nice, big messâŠâ
- Chest rises and falls frantically. Shallow, deep breaths and pants escape through your nose. Teeth biting into, leaving faint impressions in the ball gag; taste of rubber, along with all those sweets you gobbled up earlier, flooding your mouth.  âMaybe then Iâll let you open, use another presentâŠâÂ
- The coil inside you is so tight, the heat stifling. Holes flutter and clench like crazy at the sound of rapid, wet slaps. The symphony of gruff moans, low snarls. âOne that Iâm sureâŠâ    Slick trickles down your plump bottom, dripping onto the pile of strewn pieces of festive wrapping and bows beneath. Mixing and mingling with his juices, to create a jolly cocktail. âMy babe will love even betterâŠâ
- Yet again he clicks twice. Causing you to scream and cry quietly in joy all becauseâŠÂ You're spending a truly magical and memorable Christmas Eve.  Exactly how you wantedâŠÂ Spoiled rotten by your dotting daddyâŠÂ Surrounded, dwelling in your own personal ToylandâŠ
Tag List: @espinathena-17, @myheartwillgoon2022, @laylaplease, @princessswifie, @kenobiskywalker16, @loverforoldermen, @adorbzliz, @sythethecarrot, @divineani, @fuckmyskywalker, @jediavengers, @anisangeldust, @anakinstwinklebunny, @xhunnybeeex
@hearts4sammonroe, @pitas-star, @sythethecarrot, @naberriess, @steven-grants-world, @valyna27, @elcaballerodragon, @yayyy5678, @anakinsrilgirlfriend, @padme-urlove, Â @brattyyybbg, @mrschr1stensen, @rosie-chan92, @beresfordsgirl, @darthdaddi, @icosmiclou
#hayden christensen#hayden christensen x reader#hayden christensen fanfiction#hayden christensen smut#stephen glass#stephen glass x reader#stephen glass fanfiction#stephen glass smut#shattered glass#shattered glass fanfiction#merry christmas#merry christmas 2024#christmas#christmas 2024#naughty or nice#naughty or nice 2024
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Permit Master Summary!
Gem is judging!
Round One: Best Smallest Thing
Jimmy- Tiny yoda he got from Grian which he wasn't supposed to tell Gem (1 Point)
Pearl- Baby crafting table that apparently isn't what she was going to bring originally so Gem is mad she gave into peer pressure (2 Points)
Joe- Tiny Hands (3 Points)
Ren-Tiny Skateboard that comes with skate shoes for his fingers that Gem watched him buy (3 Points)
Cub- Coin from 2015 Minecon (4 Points)
Martyn- Cat toy he stole from Jimmy's house and cat toy he stole from Grian (4 Points)
False- Tiny Minecraft Turtle (5 Points)
==========================
Round Two: In Hermitcraft build the most interesting face. Then using your real face, immitate the face you just made. The closest immitation wins.
I didn't catch what everyone's faces looked like.
Cub used nerf darts being held up to his face.
Joe is already dressed as a pumpkin which is what his face was.
False has utilized a snack box and oranges.
Ren, Martyn and Jimmy all used sticky notes to imitate theirs.
Pearl drew on her face in green sharpie.
Cub got a 1
False got a 2
Joe and Ren both got a 3
Martyn and Jimmy got a 4
Pearl got a 5
==========================
Round Three: Write a jingle to encourage donations. The best jingle wins. You can use non hermits.
Jimmy has stolen Oli immediately. Oli is playing the keyboard at home and Jim has a toy guitar. Jimmy isn't singing or doing anything at all, just having Oli do it.
False tried to get Skizz, Kirsty, and Impulse but they all said no. She is the only one with no partner. She is using a variety of paddles and an aluminum food tin, and asking chat for rap lyrics because she can't sing. She has decided to pull up a beat on her phone and rap to it.
Martyn has a bunch of weapons as instruments that he is having Skizz use for drumming and is using chat for lyrics. He is also rapping. I liked his the best.
Pearl is singing to herself and is using Karn to sing and write lyrics. They are just singing, no instruments. They did a very Aussie song.
Ren is using paddles and a stool as drums and has commandeered a Gamer's Outreach employee named Stage (?) to play harmonica. He's doing some kind of chant? His was my least favorite.
Cub has the cat key board with Impulse playing and is using chat for lyrics. Cub is also rapping to Impulse banging on the keyboard. Short and sweet.
Joe has a phone keyboard and Badger. He has done a song to tune of Old McDonald.
Jimmy gets 0 points. Oli gets 5 points.
False got 2 points. She is not happy. She is threatening to beat Skizz up and yelling.
Pearl and Karn's acapella Aussie duet gets a 3.
Cub and Impulse get a 3 for Impulse's silly little expression.
Ren and Stage got a 3 because Gem pities Stage.
Joe gets 4 points for a "fantastic little jingle".
Martyn gets 5 which we expected.
Bonus Task: They tricked Jimmy into lining up 100 pieces of grass. In classic taskmaster fashion, no one else did it.
==========================
Task Four: Take the best shot. Either record it and send it in discord or tell them when you're ready to put in their brain boxes later.
Everyone has grabbed Weapons except for Jimmy.
I got this sick screenshot of False.
Pearl dunked the enderman plushie in the toy chest.
Joe has a Nerf bow and arrow and tried to hit a sheep in a cardboard cutout and missed three times and hit once.
Cub has a toy bow and arrow and failed to shoot it into a Target bag three times and hit once.
Martyn managed to catch a rubber chicken thrown from a balcony in a bucket.
Ren repeatedly failed to shoot a coffee cup off of Karn's computer when asked to do it live, but someone got a video of him doing it successfully to show them
False has a good shot of Martyn. Just a nice photo she's gonna Tweet out.
Jimmy failed a bunch of times to try and kick an orange in a cone and ran out of time. "Chat, your streamer, useless" said Gem to Jimmy's stream.
False is still mad at Gem. "I don't usually say to send hate, but please send hate to Gem".
Jimmy gets 0 points for not taking a shot and wasting oranges.
Joe and Cub both get 1 point for failing repeatedly but at least they tried.
False gets 3 points for taking an unflattering shot of Martyn.
Pearl gets 4 points for dunking the enderman smoothly.
Ren and Martyn get 5 points for being actually impressive.
==========================
Round Five: Meet up with your partners in Hermitcraft and invent the best secret handshake.
Teams: Cub and Joe, Martyn Jim and Pearl, Ren and False
Ren is going to get murdered by False. She is so angry at him because he can't figure out how to get into a group. They are building two "hands". False is going to kill this man. They are making their handshake even after time is up. Ren is trying to tell her time is up and she is telling him it doesn't matter and to just listen to her.
The Evo Crew is setting off firework rockets and jumping from a high place with totems. Pearl is stealing from Cub and planning on paying him back later. They have the energy of a group of children trying to make a play to get to sleepover.
Cub and Joe are having two armor stands shake hands. They are the only ones doing anything efficiently.
THE HANDSHAKES ARE MEANT TO BE IRL! THEY PLANNED THEM IN MINECRAFT BUT HAVE TO DO THEM IRL!
The Evo Crew did a little dance one at a time and threw a bunch of Nerf Darts like fireworks.
Joe and Cub are fake dueling with forks.
False and Ren have jumped, did a fake little throw on the ground, done a spin, and then jumped towards each other to do a high five.
False accidentally said on the main mic that she's going to throw an orange at Ren's head.
Ren and False and Joe and Cub got 4 points.
The Evo Crew got 5 points.
==========================
Final Round: Disguise a carrot. The best disguise wins.
Pearl's Final Result:
Joe's Final Result:
Cub's Final Result:
False's Final Result:
Jimmy's Final Result:
Ren's Final Result:
Martyn's Final Result
Final Round Scores:
Joe gets 1 point because he hid his rather than disguised it.
Cub gets 2 points for being low effort.
False gets 3 points because Gem can still tell its a carrot.
Martyn gets 4 points.
Tied for 5 points are Pearl, Ren, and Jimmy.
==========================
Final Scores:
7th Place: Oli-5 points
6th Place: Jimmy and Cub-15
5th Place: Joe-17
4th Place: False-19
3rd Place: Ren- 23
2nd Place: Pearl-24
1st Place: Martyn-27
Martyn wins all the tiny things!
#grian#geminitay#joe hills#cubfan135#falsesymmetry#inthelittlewood#pearlescentmoon#rendog#solidaritygaming#orionsound
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đ”đ¶đ đźđ»đđ¶đđ”đČđđ¶đ.



synopsis. âyou made me feel like i was a threat to you.â
contents. a bit of angst, comfort, miscommunication/lack of communication, implied friends-to-lovers, soft! satoru, takes place after the star plasma vessel incident, satoru's trauma response, unedited, something i whipped up on a whim lmao
wc. 1.3k
note. had a sudden urge to write this when i watched dazai edits and i hope i'll find more inspiration to write like..i just wanna be consistent for once đ„Č
comments and reblogs are highly appreciated! <3

the inverted spear of heaven was no more.
the star plasma vessel incident â mainly toji fushiguro â had carved its mark into satoruâs flesh. after satoru had killed the man, he had made sure to destroy the cursed tool until not even ashes remained of the sharp blade that used to spill the blood of innocents.
it was almost like the sorcerer wanted to destroy the things that could destroy him.
however, he failed to notice how he had almost destroyed his relationship with you, too.
no longer did satoru wrap you up in his bear hugs. no longer did he let you rest your head on his shoulder on movie night. no longer were you welcome in his space.
always were you kept at an armâs length. satoru was close enough to admire but so far out of reach like the constellation of stars dotting the night sky. what you thought was no more than a phase turned out to be so much more until, in the safety of your bedroom and underneath your blankets, your vision blurred with tears.
if the sun wasn't there, the moon would remain hidden in the vast void of space. and without satoru, you couldn't shine, either. in fact, your smile dimmed until it was almost extinguished by the pain satoru put you through â but it wasnât his fault. or so you'd like to tell yourself.
satoru had danced with death when he was meant to only protect a girl.
you couldn't possibly blame him.
after all, you could neutralize the only thing that kept him safe.
the ability to nullify any cursed technique upon touch was as convenient as it was, literally, cursed. with zero offensive abilities, you always relied on satoru or suguru to cover for you in case your plans didn't work out. one miscalculation and your head would roll â that much you knew.
among every student attending jujutsu high, you were the weakest while satoru was the strongest.
it was enough to tie your fate to satoru, weaving a web of complicated feelings which usually tasted like those sugary gummy bears the sorcerer carried with him. it was sweet and warm like his embrace, but the blade of toji fushiguro had effortlessly cut through the fine webs. nothing but a cold void remained where laughter and silly inside jokes about digimon danced along the velvety threads.
almost like a black hole that swallowed the constellation in the skies, leaving behind broken galaxies and lonely stars that swallowed moons to fill the loss of their companions.
âhe's so stupid,â you muttered to yourself, threw the teddy bear in your arms into the corner of your bed and sat up to blow your nose.
the teddy bear was a polar bear adorned with button eyes and a red bow tied around its fluffy neck. it looks like you, you had mindlessly said during last year's summer festival. satoru had spent the entire evening shooting little rubber ducks to earn enough points to win the silly bear, but it was worth it for your eyes lit up like the fireworks that followed soon after.
the clock read two am when you poured boiling hot water into a cup of instant ramen, ripped open the package of spice and stirred the meal with disinterest written all over your face. not even the scent of cheap cup noodles made your tummy growl anymore. how could it when it was so full of dread, guilt and worry for the sorcerer who stole your heart and refused to give it back? it was an unfair bargain, really.
just a moment later, you heard a knock on your door. you considered ignoring it and pretending to be asleep, but alas, the lights were on and likely snuck through underneath the crack of the door to your dorm. what kind of idiot knocked on your door at two am?
satoru â the only idiot who'd knock on your door in the middle of the night and look like a kicked puppy.
âsatoru? it's two am..,â you spoke first, standing between him and the warmth of your dorm.
satoru didn't look like satoru. even through the pitch black glasses of his shades could you see the storm brewing in those sky-blues of his. with a sigh, he rubbed his neck. âwhy does everyone keep telling me how late it is? ah, no matter.â
you wanted to ask, but decided against it.
âlook, i know it's late, but i can't help but think you've been avoiding me for the last couple of what? weeks? months?â satoru shifted his weight from one fuzzy slipper to the other. âwas it something i said?â
in that very moment, you realized you were doing the same things as he was. as soon as class was over, you'd go home alone. you'd have lunch alone. you'd spend your weekends alone. all those things once were shared with satoru in your space, but as soon as he avoided you..you avoided him, too out of fear of getting hurt.
âsatoru..don't you realize that you've been avoiding me first?â your voice was quiet as you hugged your middle. âever since the incident and the destruction of that cursed tool, you always kept me at arm's length. you no longer let me get any closer nor do you spar with me anymore. nothing..â
âyou made me feel like i was a threat to you.â
a painful epiphany coiled in satoru's stomach like a snake. was he so busy destroying the devil's tools and refining his technique that he..forgot about about you? the person who'd steal his fries and snore on his shoulder on movie night? no, no way. he would never see you as a threat even though your touch could dissolve his infinity like sugar when it touched water.
â[name], that's not..â the words got stuck in his throat. for the first time in his life, he was speechless. âyou are anything but a threat.â
âthen why..â tears brimmed your eyes until they overflowed, ran down the apples of your cheeks and met the warmth of satoruâs thumb. it was not his stupid infinity wiping the tears away, but satoru himself.
to be touched by satoru felt like the first sunrays of spring gracing your skin. warm, familiar and hinting at the end of a long, unforgiving winter that had taken root in your belly. soft sobs bubbled in the back of your throat, rocking your shoulders and interrupting every word you wanted to say; how stupid he was, how much you missed him, how much you needed him.
âshh..say no more,â satoru whispered and took you in his strong arms so you could sob into his chest all you wanted.
satoru didn't care about the tears or snot wetting his shirt. all that mattered was the feeling of you in his arms, and even though it pained him to know that he caused those tears, this was better than receiving your cold shoulder and dismissive smiles.
quietly, you and satoru went back inside the warmth of your dorm where both of you shared some cheap cup ramen which satoru spiced up with some peppers, egg and a conversation which neither of you would remember in the morning to come. no amount of time seemed to have passed between you as you both laughed, bickered and exchanged glances like lovers-to-be would.
âwhat are you doing?,â you asked, long comfortable underneath the sheets of your bed â or you would be if satoru didn't hold them up and almost looked offended by your words.
âsleeping with you, duh,â he said like it was the most normal thing in the world and maybe it was.
ignoring your protests and pouts, satoru crammed himself into bed with you, one arm around your waist and the other one underneath your head. his broad chest gently pressed against your back, his warmth enveloped you like a blanket.
âyou're stupid,â you smiled to yourself while a blush as red as roses crept up your cheeks.
âand you're lucky i love you,â satoru grumbled underneath his breath, blowing some strands of your hair away from his nose and mouth so he wouldn't suffocate while holding you so tight.

taglist. @torusmochi, @cinnamonmon
#gojo satoru x reader#gojo satoru x you#jujutsu kaisen x reader#gojo satoru#jujutsu kaisen#fic. his antithesis#gojo satoru fluff#gojo satoru angst
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I imagine eddie would have a little family time kid friendly valentines with the reader on one day and an adults only, ship the kids off somewhere valentines another day
What gifts or things do you think would happen on that day
Id imagine reader would wake up eddie by dressing the kids up as cherubs and attacking him with rubber sucker arrows to shoot at him
đŠ
Family friendly Valentineâs Day is in the morning, After Hours (bow chicka bow wow) Valentineâs Day is from the evening and all through the night đ while the kids are sleeping over with grandpa Wayne and Maude.
I like the way you think and thatâs very cute, reader buying the kids pairs of wings to wear and those annoying ass toy Cupid bow and arrows and then releases them into the bedroom to assault Eddie. It makes for a really good home movie and pictures for the family album.
Eddie OF COURSE was prepared and had to hide all of the gifts he got in the van because not a single person in the house, including reader, can be trusted not to go snooping. Eddie gets the girls and Wayne (his little Ferdinand đ„ș) flowers, called into a floral shop weeks in advance to place the order and while reader absolutely loves her roses, seeing penny and wayneâs reaction to getting them is like the best thing in the world. They get all shy and happy about having received something so special, and their bouqets are significantly smaller than readerâs but it doesnât matter; Wayneâs got his nose in his daisies, sniffing away for the rest of the day, and Penny lets reader help make hers into a flower crown, so she can wear it the entire day. They also gorge themselves on chocolate and candy, which reader isnât happy about but Eddie couldnât not buy some for them! Besides, the inevitable sugar high will be big Wayneâs problem.
Penny and Wayne will have made homemade Valentineâs cards that say something along the lines of âcongrazâ (Wayne, still says âhappy birthdayâ for most holiday greetings and gets confused with them all so itâs a congratulations from him this time). And Pennyâs are just amusing (âHappy Valentineâs Day, daddy! I gots no monies so this is what you get, i love you ps get me flowers and member i dont like white chocletâ and âHappy Valentineâs Day, mommy! You are my valentine now, not daddys but you can kiss daddy on the lips, but i saw hims eat some onions one time and they are stinky good luckâ)
BUT, Eddie has plans for him and Reader, so the kids are pawned off to Wayne and Maude, reader is whisked away to a romantic dinner and then brought home for some very much needed alone time. They share a couple of joints on the porch, he gives her a foot massage because her feet ache a little from the heels she wore to dinner, they talk about their life; where they are in it, what they thought theyâd be doing by then and how happy they are regardless, then they move things into the bedroom. Put those cuffs, Eddie now has to hide, to good use. Spend the rest of the night fucking like rabbits well into early morning, nearly depleting the box of condoms in the night stand. In between rounds, Eddie and reader finish off the leftovers from their dinner in bed when the munchies kick in, sharing a bottle of water, lounging around naked, talking about everything under the sunâweed induced peculiar thoughts, of courseâand enjoying each otherâs company. Itâs reminiscent of the early days of their relationship, before the jobs, before the kids, before any of the responsibilities, when they were just teenagers.
Come morning light, youâll have to go get your kids and slip back into the roles of mom and dad, which the two of you are more than happy to do, but itâs also nice to play a little pretend for the night.
Happy belated Valentineâs Day! đ©·
(P.s. part of the Pennyverse for any new readers âĄ)
#$ replies#pennyverse#pennyverse asks#dad!eddie munson#dad!eddie munson x reader#dad!eddie munson x mom!reader#Eddie munson x reader#Eddie munson fluff#black!reader
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totally reasonable development to the American Dream plan, don't even sweat it
(and the 24+ sentences i owe to the pollers)
Toshinori bounces on his heels, feeling lighter than air with the anticipation of tonightâs activities buzzing along his nerves. Heâs dressed in a dark hooded sweatshirt, denim jeans, and the sneakers Gran Torino had bought specifically for their high-quality rubber soles.
And speaking of, Gran Torino should be up on the roofs somewhereâŠ
The front door to the Midoriya apartment opens, and Izuku slips out after a hasty farewell to his mother, which is paired with a lackluster promise to stay safe. Toshinori manages a single jaunty wave before Izuku shuts it, and then his attention is turned to give Izukuâs outfit a critical once-over.
âYou donât have any other shoes?â Toshinori asks, contemplating the red hue of his successorâs sneakers. The rest of the clothes are appropriately sturdy and dark in palette.
âNo? SorryâŠâ
âEh, it should be fine. There shouldnât be a lot of traffic up top anyway. Come on, letâs move!â
They make their way to the stairs, but to Izukuâs obvious confusion, Toshinori leads them further up.
âYagi-san, you said that this was going to be a special Basic Physical Fitness Training session,â the kid says. âCan I ask⊠who thought of it? You, or Gran Torino?â
âOh, this is totally my idea,â says Toshinori breezily. âI know the beach clean-up is the ultimate goal, and itâll stay as your focus before high school, but I realized today that there are some experiences that you just canât replicate as a holder of One for All! Experiences that even our Quirkless bodies can manage!â
They head higher. Izuku gets more nervous, but gamely follows Toshinori up the fire safety ladder.
On the roof, Gran Torino greets them with a curt, âBoys. This is the stupidest thing I can imagine for you two to do, in the stupidest place possible.â Heâs sitting on the ledge, and as Toshinori requested, two lengths of steel pipes are leaned up next to him.
âMusutafuâs perfectly safe,â Toshinori counters. âAnd with you here, Gran Torino, thereâs minimal risk of, well...â
âFalling to your deaths?â
Izuku squeaks. He quivers beside Toshinori, and when Toshinori glances down, Izuku is staring at the pipes, aghast. âWhat are we doing, Yagi-san?â
âWe,â Toshinori says with great dignity, âare training in the great art of parkour. The pipes are insurance for safety, supposing we see real trouble that a pro-hero wonât get to in time.â
âLegally speaking, vigilantism,â Gran Torino interrupts.
âBut weâre not going to get caught.â
âWhich makes you juvenile delinquents.â
âGran Torino,â Toshinori complains, feeling delightfully young and unburdened now that heâs gotten accustomed to Torinoâs incredible, mellowed-out approach to training Izuku. What trauma? What spars? Toshinori at fifteen didnât know anything about that, and Gran Torino at his current age looked nothing like the pro-hero who haunted the end of his high school career!
âIâm enabling you, arenât I?â the old man shoots back. âDonât I get to express my own opinions?â
âIs it really safe, though?â Izuku asks.
âOf course!â Toshinori picks up a pipe, hefts it, and tosses it over to Izuku, who catches it while wearing a thoroughly beleaguered expression. Then he grabs the other. âListen, Midoriya-kun. If itâs really going to be a year until you get One for All, then the American Dream plan can afford to be a little flexible! You want to be a U.A. student, right?!â
âR-right!â
âThen we canât just train your body!â he cries, lifting the pipe like a torch. âWeâve gotta train your willingness to get into a scrap!â
A little more wobbly, Izuku repeats, âR-right!â And because his successor is more polite, Izuku turns to Gran Torino and executes a little bow, adding, âThank you for letting us do this, Gran Torino! And for keeping an eye on us!â
Torino sighs.
#bnha#yagi toshinori#all might#midoriya izuku#deku#deaged at dagobah au#now that pipe wielding young toshi has been canonized#i GOTTA have them running around town. pipsqueak (nominally in toshinori's case) vigilantes#and their long suffering chaperone gran torino#gran torino: no officer i don't believe i saw any dumb kids taking down this burglar#and he's glaring DAGGERS at a dumpster where toshinori and izuku are hiding#anyways update to the au i'm trying to map out like four chapters#before i post the first#shih.txt#shih's art
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Can you elaborate on almost killing a guy?
Yeah sure.
Some of you have heard this story before but this is definitely one of the most unhinged things I've ever done, so I enjoy telling it.
It was my sophomore year of high school. I was living in Florida, and having the time of my life. Both of my parents worked, I had a phone, and I'd made friends with a boy in my neighborhood, and therefore found a suitable chaperone to protect my weak, innocent, girl-self (a depressed egg with messy hair who alternated between oversized hoodies with converse and a trench coat with combat boots) from any potential dangers. This meant that I finally had actual proper freedom to do whatever I wanted as long as I was home by 9pm and kept in touch with my mom. My friend was in a similar situation, having helicopter parents that had been forced to roll back their micromanaging in order to pay the bills. So naturally, when a suspicious car with tinted windows started hanging around outside the bus stop after school and never picked anyone up, my friend and I did not tell our parents. Instead, we would stand outside at the bus stop, chatting and watching the car, until the driver got bored and left.
This went on for a couple of months, almost every day. Unfortunately, my friend and I also had unmedicated ADHD. One day I was carrying home this giant art project -a candy sculpture of St Basil's Cathedral. This break in routine and the fact that the sculpture was edible, melting, and fucking heavy, caused us to completely forget about the car. We went straight back to his place, and the driver did what we'd always feared he would do, and followed us.
We were just digging into the cathedral when my friend's dogs went ballistic. We walked into the entry way to see what they were freaking out about, and saw a sunburnt man with a scraggly beard, blue t-shirt, and cargo shorts walking up the sidewalk, and behind him, was the car with tinted windows.
We made eye contact. We both froze, and then the intruder took off around the side of the house, where the garage entrance was. My friend and I ran to the garage entrance as well because we hadn't locked it when we came inside. A moment after we locked it, the doorknob jiggled violently, and the man began pounding on the door.
This is the point where we should've called the police. But this is Florida. In the garage was my friend's dad's hunting gear, which included several guns, a hatchet, various knives, and a bow, and some arrows. And like an American does in a stand-your-ground state when a man tries to break into your house, we devised a plan to kill him.
This was a relatively calm discussion. We considered using the guns, but we weren't experienced with anything stronger than a BB gun, so in the name of gun safety, we went for the weapons we were experienced with. My friend chose a hatchet and a baseball bat. I took the bow and arrow, which I knew how to use because another friend of mine lived in a rural area, and we liked to climb trees and shoot rubber turkeys like we were Katniss Everdeen or something. The idea was to go outside with our weapons and act super excited to commit our very first murder. Ideally we'd scare him off, but if he continued his attempted assault, then we would kill him. What about his screams? The neighborhood was almost empty because the snowbirds had gone north, and everyone else was at work. The blood on the concrete? Nothing a little peroxide and elbow grease can't fix. To dispose of the body? Our neighborhood didn't have real blocks. Most houses were built around ponds. Where there's water, there are gators, which two burglars had learned a few months prior when they jumped in the water to escape the cops. All the police recovered was a shirt, an arm, and a chunk of a torso. We figured the gators would take care of what we assumed would be the hardest part of this crime. And as for the car? We'd just say how strange it was. We'd never seen it before.
All in all, it was a perfect plan. We'd finally be able to walk home without possibly being followed, we wouldn't go to jail, and most importantly, our parents would never, ever know the danger we were in without their suffocating supervision, and we would be free to roam wherever we pleased.
We took our weapons, went back to the front door, and I prepared a performance worthy of Creepypasta. We ran out onto the sidewalk, smiling, giggling, "Come out, come out wherever you are. I have a bow and arrow. I haven't gotten to use it on a real person before! I want to see what color your blood is when it dries on the sidewalk." Good and proper evil villain serial killer shit. I went all out for this.
We did that for a few minutes, and the man never appeared, so we circled the house, and then went back inside through the back door. When we went back to the entry way, through the window, we saw the man run out onto the front lawn, jump in his car, and speed away.
We never did see that car again, but a few weeks later, my homeroom teacher had the local news playing on the TV. They were covering a story about a man who had kidnapped a woman for ransom. He was caught on the same day, and his mugshot looked very, very, very familiar...
I honestly believe that if the man had decided to confront us, he would not have left the house alive. I also learned a very important lesson; if you act giddy and violent (and make unnecessary eye contact), men will usually leave you the fuck alone. This method has never failed me.
So yeah. That's the story of how my friend and I almost killed a guy. And no, I do not feel bad at all.
#obviously would take a different approach if in that situation today#but like idk if you stalk teenagers and then try to break into their houses while they're home you deserve whatever happens to you#and also most cops are fucking useless anyways
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Trick! Jason/Roy, Pumpkin please and thank you =)
I laughed out loud like ten times while writing this, so I hope you get as much amusement out of it as I did.
Read on below, or on AO3
It's The Great Pumpkin, Jason Todd
âI thought Ivy was playing nice lately? She and Harley were settling down and raising carnivorous roses together or something?âÂ
âShe has been. Thatâs why weâre investigating. Dickie Bird says that Ivy is insisting sheâs not involved with this. Gave proper alibis and everything.âÂ
Jason hunkered down next to the fence and made a cup with his hands to boost Roy up to the top.Â
âHoly shit,â Roy hissed when he got a look over.Â
âFeel free to pull yourself the rest of the way up. You know, any time now. Your balls are basically on my forehead right now.âÂ
Reaching down, Roy swatted around until he hit the top of Jasonâs head. âYouâve gotta see this.âÂ
âI canât see anything. Because, and I believe I mentioned this already, your balls are sitting on my fucking forehead.âÂ
When Roy made no effort to climb the rest of the way on his own or to shift his crotch away from his partnerâs face, Jason growled deep in his throat and stood up, forcing Roy to the top of the fence in one quick motion.Â
His idiot redhead flailed and squawked in surprise and tumbled headfirst over the fence, landing on the other side with a wet squelch.Â
Jason had been raised better than to laugh. Too hard.Â
He only had about three seconds total to enjoy himself before Roy let out a scream.Â
âArsenal!â Using little more than his fingernails and the rubber toes of his tactical boots, Jason scrambled up the wooden fence. He landed in a crouch, already drawing his guns to take aim at-
âOhhh, this is gonna suuuuck.âÂ
Ambling slowly across the pumpkin patch was a Jack oâLantern.Â
An enormous one.Â
At least the size of an SUV, and getting bigger as the pumpkins around it withered on the vine as it passed.Â
And it was dragging Roy in its wake, the man tangled up in vines that pinned his arms to his side and were snaking into his mouth to keep him quiet. Still, he struggled and bit and fought to reach one of his arrows or his gun. His bow snagged on a dried pumpkin and pulled free.Â
The mud in the patch slurped at Jasonâs boots, slowing him to little more than a jog. Unable to reach his partner, he fired at the monster. âHey, Jackass!âÂ
His bullets only made wet, meager thuds when they hit the gargantuan gourd and were absorbed into it, but it was at least enough to get its attention.Â
It bellowed noiselessly, pulp and seeds spewing out of the jagged mouth and raining down around the patch. One of its trailing vines slithered across the mud to wrap around Jasonâs ankle and yanked him off balance. He was dragged forward and as he scrambled for purchase to pull away, his fingers brushed something smooth and solid.Â
Jason clutched at Royâs bow and twisted around onto his back. His jacket was hiked up and dead vines jabbed and scraped at his back. âBoom arrow!â he shouted to Roy who had pried his quiver free and was trying to stab at his bounds with one of his classic arrows.Â
Roy understood immediately, but he knew they would only have one chance at this. The vines he had bitten through were already regrowing and they were winding around his throat. There were spots in his vision from his air being cut off completely. He strained to get his fingers into the quiver, sorting through them by touch alone to find the arrow he needed.Â
He pulled it out and sent it end over end at Jason just as he passed him.Â
Not for the first time, he wondered if he had been a good enough teacher, but he couldnât do anything but trust Jason when he nocked the arrow and took aim. Shooting from the ground was hard enough. Doing it while being hauled across a cursed pumpkin patch with mutant vines trying to pull his limbs off would be next to impossible.Â
The arrow loosed and buried to the fletching in the pumpkin.Â
For an agonising moment, nothing happened.Â
Then the explosive detonated. Briefly, the pumpkin glowed from within, light shining out through its mouth and eyes, casting a shine over the field.Â
Until it burst apart, chunks flying out in a near perfect circle and falling to the ground. Spattering the two men with orange sludge.Â
The vines holding them captive went limp and they were able to scramble free. Jason crawled to Royâs side and flopped over next to him.Â
Between pants for air, Roy spoke.âNext Halloween, weâre just taking Lian trick-or-treating, and staying in to watch movies.âÂ
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80 with some mountain/swiss? if you'd so kindly write it :)
Mountain/Swiss with a little bit of mean Swiss and some boot kink (as a treat). Also still taking prompts!
Swiss knows what he looks like up on that stage. How his uniform pants hug his hips in just the right way, how the vest cinched tight around his waist accentuates his broad shoulders and chest. The way he grinds into his mic stand, strokes his rain shaker like it's an extension of himself.
Swiss loves putting on a show, and tonight, Mountain feels like the show is just for him. Swiss has been watching him all night long, eyes shining and brilliant white fangs on display. Every thrust of his hips and flick of his tongue were aimed directly at Mountainâs kit, and Swiss made sure he knew it. Every time Mountain glanced at Swissâ platform heâd been staring back at him, shooting him that signature too-wide grin normally reserved for the crowd.
Mountain sweats through his uniform faster than usual that night.
At bows he feels Swiss press up against him and take his hand. And he doesnât let go as they walk off stage, dragging him past the techs and through the venue to the dressing rooms. Mountain is still sweating as Swiss pushes and pulls him, bullies him onto the dressing room couch with his long legs spread. Distantly, Mountain notices that his own boot laces are still untied.
âYouâve been watching me all night, big guyâ Swiss laughs, âPretty sure youâve been drooling.â
Mountain sputters, wanting to point out that Swiss had been leering at him all night, but the thought is snuffed out when Swiss leans in to kiss him, shoving his tongue into his mouth, wet and hot and licking in deep. He tastes like cannabis and grease makeup.
Mountain is hard in his pants immediately.
Swiss breaks the kiss, straightening back up and grinning down at Mountain again. Hungry.Â
Heâs still grinning when he lifts one foot to press between Mountainâs legs, digging directly into his crotch with the toe of his boot. Mountain moans ragged and deep as Swiss increases the pressure, bending his knee and leaning in as he presses the thick rubber sole of his boot onto Mountainâs straining cock.
âWhat? Does that feel good?â Swiss teases, feigning surprise as Mountain whimpers an affirmative, hands scrabbling at the fabric of the couch as Swiss eases the pressure.
Mountain clenches his eyes and nods frantically when Swiss presses in again. This time he twists his foot, dragging the toe of his boot down Mountainâs cock before pressing in one more time with his heel. Mountain can feel the entire sole of his boot pressing against the length of his twitching cock, and he opens his eyes to see a dark, wet patch blooming at the tip, soaking through the fabric.
âThink you can cum like this?â Swiss asks, sounding genuinely surprised. Mountain nods again.
Heâs expecting Swiss to take pity on him, press back in with his boot and finish him off right there in his pants, making a mess of his uniform and the dressing room couch. Instead Swiss pulls away completely, leaving Mountain shaking, looking up at him through damp lashes.Â
Heâs ready to start begging when Swiss hauls himself into Mountainâs lap. Suddenly itâs a blur, Swiss grinding into his lap, dragging his own clothed erection up and down Mountainâs leaking cock as he humps relentlessly against him. The couch creaks with their weight as Swiss attaches his mouth to Mountainâs neck, eagerly nipping and sucking with filthy, wet sounds. Swiss snakes a hand into Mountainâs hair, licking across his Adamâs apple, mouthing thick and slick into his ear, dragging the sharp points of his fangs up the length of his pulsing jugular as he twists and grinds. Treating Mountainâs lap like a mirror image of his mic stand on stage.
Mountain feels the heat coil in his gut, balls drawing up tight and ready to bust when Swiss backs off. He cries out at his ruined orgasm and Swiss only grins down at him, black grease paint nearly completely smudged off, remnants of it staining his fangs. Mountain knows his neck must be a fucking wreck, streaked with black and peppered with bruises, shiny wet with Swissâ spit.
âToo bad,â Swiss laughs, and pats Mountanâs cheek with the palm of one big hand. He stands, adjusting his own straining cock in his pants and turns to leave with a sway of his hips.Â
Mountain can only stare, chest heaving and erection flagging as Swiss makes for the door of the dressing room.
Before he leaves, he looks at Mountain over his shoulder, sporting another wicked grin.Â
âRooming with Aether tonight, think maybe you should ask to swap hotel keys with him.âÂ
Swiss blows him a kiss and as the door closes, Mountain can hear Swiss laughing to himself all the way down the hallway.
#swiss army ghoul#swiss ghoul#mountain ghoul#swiss/mountain#mountain/swiss#ghost fanfiction#ghost band fanfic#swiss x mountain#mountain x swiss#ghoul-slime ask#ghoul-slime fic
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"Fairness." One Piece x Saitama reader, 2.
"Just a Normal girl looking for an everyday life. At least, if you call sailing across the seas with idiots with useless dreams a simple task, then you might wanna see a doctor. Seriously."
Warnings: Blood, gore, mentions of Luekimia, and heaps amount of blood and strength. It might be a little cursing, but not bad, and maybe some flirting in there, but it's mostly clean.
Other things:
-You didn't get bald due to your powers; you got bald to an extreme illness.
-You part of the straw hat crew, but others are interested in you and your power.
-Everyone that is a male is taller than you.
-Monsters from the OPM world will appear in One Piece, and I'll make some new monsters you will fight.
Enjoy the second chapter, everyone. :)
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These marine people were annoying.
They kept shooting their guns at us, and it didn't even work; I don't know why they were still trying.
Crocodile just turned into sand, and Jimbei used his power and scattered water everywhere, making them slip, Luffy, however, was rubber, as the bullets reflected off of him, as I was scattering them like flies, flinging and punching them everywhere.
"It's hot!' Luffy spoke as one of them was calling for backup, as me and the crocodile didn't change a face as we kept throwing marines into the fire or kicking the shit out of them.
One of them was about to attack Crocodile behind, but he turned before I simply slapped the guy, his body exploding in front of the warlord, whose eyes widened and looked at me.
I turned to Luffy and Jimbei. "Let's keep going forward!!" They nodded, crocodile still speechless, but shook it off as he followed us more onto the floor, Marines still coming out way.
Some shot at a crocodile with regular bullets, and some of his body parts turned into sand, large holes into his body as he simply smirked at them.
Surprised, they forgot to use special bullets as he stepped forward, his left hand forming a large sand whip as he whipped them away, falling into the lava below.
Luffy blew multiple blows at once; as Jimbei did Fishman Karate, all the men surrounded them, falling into the water, ate well.
The three looked around, wondering where I went as I was ahead, trouncing more Marines. As a group surrounded me simultaneously, I simply jumped in the air, flying before launching back down, breaking the ground as they flew apart, spreading throughout.
I dodged more oncoming attacks, hitting each person in the back of the neck while kicking, sending some flying upwards or downwards to their death.
But two were about to punch me simultaneously, so I grabbed their face, the wind blowing suddenly as I harshly glared at one of them, pulling them closer as their heads smashed together, their bodies plopping to the floor as some men that were held in cells were impressed, drooling over me as the bodies of the marines plopped to the floor. "SUEGEE!!" Luffy yelled, stars in his eyes as Jimbie smiled. "Never expected this girl to have this much strength." Crocodile hummed, eying you still as you freed some prisoners. "She scattered them like bugs." As I tore down some more cell doors, some men thanked me, as the other three did the same, making sure to free every man held up in here before moving on to the next floor. But, Crocodile stopped at a particular cell and smirked, my head tilting with confusion as he turned to the prisoners. "I'm thinking of breaking out of here...care to Join us, Mister one?" I also looked that way, seeing a man with a shaved head and a more chiseled body. He looked up and simply nodded as I quickly ripped the door open with one hand, as some prisoners were shocked. "WHAT STRENGTH!" They yelled as Mister 1 came out, bowing to Crocodile, before turning to me. "You strong...what's your name?" "Abby, how do you know Crocodile?" He smiled slightly. "I worked with him in Alabasta." "I see." I turned to look at Luffy and Jimbei going forward. "We should go; we can't waste time with conversation. It's nice to meet you, Mister One." I bowed respectfully before heading to Luffy and Jimbei as he looked to Crocodile. "She's interesting." Crocodile chuckled. "That she is.." With that, the two followed after us, along with many other prisoners, as we headed to floor four, where the alarms got louder but didn't bother us.
As we were running down the hall, Ivonka and Bon-chan seemed to have caught up with us and the others, and Luffy greeted them happily as we continued more down the hallway. Crocodile and Mister One caught up as well, Bon Chan not believing his eyes but ignoring them.
Soon enough, more marines were coming towards us as I jumped high in the air, flipping in the air as I kicked down, breaking the ground again as they all scattered, my face bit changing a shade of emotion. Ivanka's head grew big, helping with the load as Mister One was quick, slicing and killing the marines with the scissorsman, both of them watching each other back. I ran forward with Crocodile, bullets not affecting us as we took care of more ahead, Luffy and Jimbei helping the others in the back as everyone caught up again.
But, our path soon would be blocked by giant animals; my eyes widened with shock as they looked like the stuffed animals I had at home. "H-HOLY CRAP!" everyone was confused about why they wouldn't let us past, as a lady wearing a very revealing outfit came out, as her tongue licked her lips. "They won't let you all out, and neither would I!" I cringed as she was almost naked, and I'm glad I'm not dressed like that. But, as we were about to attack the giant stuffed animals, Ivanka's men/women stepped forward wanting to fight them for us, thanking them as he, him, Jimbei, Mister One, Ivanka, Crocodile, and others were allowed to pass through.
But, I had an ill feeling as I stepped back, as these stuffed animals seemed more robust than those people. "Guys! Go ahead, I'll help them!" Luffy was shocked. "But, Y/n, you're supposed to help me-" "I smile at him." Don't worry, I'll catch up. It will take me five seconds, tops." Not Knowing what you mean, he just nodded, as they all continued forwards, but Crocodile decided to stay behind as I ran back towards the stuffed Animals, them sensing me as they turned as I launched into the air. "You will not hurt these people! You will let us escape!!" I punched the Koala, and it was quickly killed and exploded when I only hit it once, as everyone's eyes widened suddenly. "WHAT?!!!!!!" Yelled Ivanka's crew as guts and organs were falling, and another one of the animals attacked; I teleported behind it, punched it in the back of the head, it sharing the same fate as his friend, as did the last one as well, which I blocked from punching a woman, as my feet slammed into its stomach, causing it to explode, and launch to the crocodile who was smirking, and grabbed its heart, and destroyed it with his sand power. My power shocked everyone, like how did I kill all three with one punch and a kick?! Crocodile showed no emotion on the outside, but secretly, his heart was racing with slight fear as he eyed you, wondering why you were hiding all that strength under your cuteness? He couldnât read you, as the look you gave off were innocent, open minded, but no, inside you were ruthless, like a pirate should be. Soon enough, I motioned Ivanka's crew to continue as I ran to the crocodile, grabbing his hand as he followed. "Come on! Let's catch up!" Not thinking of anything when holding his hand, he was confused about why you were doing this but wasn't bothered from pulling away, as the two of you soon saw Luffy and the others.
Crocodile picked you up and used his sand to get you both quicker to them. You were in his arms as he landed, and Luffy smiled brightly, not bothered that the warlord was holding you, being careful not to drop you. "Y/n-san!!" He greeted, the others happy to see me again as Crocodile let me hop off, and I ran beside Jimbei. "How close are we to the next floor?!" Jimbei looked ahead. "Not far! You weren't kidding when you said you'd be five minutes! How did you manage that?â I smirked at his question. "A girl has her ways; now come on, everyone, let's go!"
"Yes!"
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We all were still trying to get out of level four, as more marines and guards were still trying to stop us, but quickly failed as I got cut slightly, my mouth hissing before Mister One sliced the person in front of me, his head turning. "You alright?!" I nod, taking a deep breath before punching another guy coming at me; he is just dead, even from the slightest impact. "I'm fine! Let's continue!" He was confused and ducked from a sword about to slice him as Bon-chan kicked him away, the scissorsman cutting the man dead. "They just keep coming! They really hate us, pirates, huh?!" Crocodile scoffed, bringing one in the air as he landed beside me, glaring at Luffy. "What the hell are they supposed to do? Let us leave with kittens and rainbows as souvenirs?" Bon-chan slumped as Crocodile dodged more bullets. "That would be nice..." "EVERYONE! I SEE THE STAIRS TO THE NEXT FLOOR! I WILL OPEN THE DOOR!" Scissorsman yelled, as I nodded, following him first as everyone ran with us and followed.
Soon enough, we reached a large door, and the man used his scissors, cutting in different directions until he stopped, the door already opening by itself.
We stopped, not knowing what was happening as some prisoners were about to enter the door, until I saw someone on the other side. "Wait!" I yelled, causing them to stop. "There's someone there!" A weird-shaped man, who was twirling his sword in the air, was facing us; it slammed into the ground as he glared at us harshly. "No criminal has gotten past me here and escaped alive!" My head tilted with confusion as I pointed to him blankly. "Who is this?" Scissors man stood beside me. "He is Hannyabal-the vice warden of this prison." He stated as more prisoners came up from behind. I sensed something more wrong as I saw guns pointing at them, and my eyes widened. "GET DOWN!!" The prisoners suddenly listened as gunshots fired, Luffy and Crocodile blocking everyone from getting hit; as some got tied into nets, Luffy and I looked back with slight annoyance. "Luffy... there are probably gunmen hiding in the stairs case; we must fight through them after all." His teeth gritted, as did the scissorsman, the Vice warden laughing. "That is right; there is no escape for you all!" He confessed as Luffy walked forward. I was about to stop him until Jimbei put a hand on my shoulder, his head shaking. I sighed and looked like Luffy was fighting him, but the Vice warden's attacks were quick as he struggled.
But, as the sword was about to hit Luffy's neck, I stood before him, my teeth biting on the blade as I broke instantly, his and the other's eyes widening suddenly.
"E-EH?!!!!!"
It was like slow motion, as the pieces of the blade fell to the floor, Luffy and Jimbei looking at me with utter shock, as the Vice warden stepped back with fear. "N-Now, wait a minute, h-how." I gave him no time to speak as I stepped aside, Luffy running to him and giving the warden a final blow as he slid back, unconscious.
The other soldiers were terrified, but they attacked anyway as the others helped fend them off, as the exit was right in front of us. Once all of the soldiers on this floor were down, we took a second and looked to the stairs to floor four.
But when we all thought we could get to the third floor, black-like mist spread from the stairs, and the warden was soon kicked out of the way.
The man seemed familiar to everyone, as you were clueless as he was more extensive, uglier, and seemed powerful. His menacing laugh arose around us as his eyes looked up at us with a sinister smirk. "I-Ive met him at J-Jaya!" Luffy spoke, his eyes widening as both men stared each other down; tension was high in the air as this man blocked our chance again to the third floor. "Oh! Wow! So many familiar faces!Interestingly, I get to see them all at once CHEHAHAHAHAHA!!!" Everyone glared at him harshly, while I was still confused about who he was, as I looked at Jimbeis, fist clenching. "It seems like you all were in the middle of something!" Teech!!!" Jimbei roared as the man looked at him, and both glared harshly at each other, the tension just as high as before.
"WHY THE HELL ARE YOU HERE?!!!"
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#One Piece x reader#one piece#black beard#edward teach#blackbeard#Zoro#Sanji#Jimbei#Mister One#Nami#Luffy#Usopp#Franky#Chopper#Robin#Ivanka#Buggy#one punch man#one piece fandom#Anime x reader#Anime
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Resting
(Warnings: A lot of angst in this one with not a lot of fluff, sorry my lovelies<3)
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Daisy was quiet as she sat on the tree stump, whittling something that hadnât quite taken shape yet, lost in her own thoughts until someone sat down next to her with a small sigh, her eyes moving to look at who it was and she sighed heavily in annoyance. âWhatâre you carving? Something to kill a dead one with?â Justin asked casually and she eyed him before scoffing, standing up to leave when he spoke up âIâm just being friendly-â
âIâm not allowed to be around you or talk to you.â
âYour uncle said that? Do you always do whatever he wants?â
âHeâs kept me alive all this time and Iâve made it this far by doing mostly what he says, so; yesâ she stated with a scoff, hearing Justin laugh a little ânah, you made it this far âcause youâre good at it.â
âGood at what?â
âSurviving.â
âIâm barely fifteen, I was a kid when all of this startedâ she hissed, taking a step closer to him, chest heaving with anger âhe kept me alive, he trained me to survive and fight. He taught me how to hunt and make arrows and uncle Rick taught me to shoot, and just so you know, Iâm a damn good shot. So stay away from me.â
âDamn⊠I love the ones that play hard to get.â
âIâm fifteen! Assholeâ she muttered with a scoff and left, Siddiq watching nervously before approaching her, walking next to her âare you okay?â
âYeah, heâs just-... a creep⊠seems like pretty much every Savior isâŠâ
âAre they still âSaviorsâ?â
âItâs only been almost a year, of course they areâ she muttered bitterly and Siddiq studied her before gently stopping her, carefully taking the piece of wood from her hands âwhatâre you making?â he asked with a small smirk and heat crept up her neck with slight embarrassment âa duckâŠâ
âA duck??â
âI think I like ducks, so yes, a duckâ she stated firmly yet she avoided his gaze, making him a little amused as he nodded and gave her back the piece âI think you need to work on the beak a littleâ he stated and her cheeks turned rosy pink âI was going to when Mr. Creep decided to swing by for a visitâ she muttered and Siddiq smirked with amusement as he nodded âI wanna see it when itâs doneâ he ordered as he walked off, hearing her scoff behind him âyeah? Well-... maybeâ she called after him and he turned to face her while walking backwards âI look forward to it!â He called and she looked down at the piece of wood, sighing heavily as she left to find another spot to sit down and continue her work on her duck. Or whatever the hell it was meant to be.
It wasnât long until she was somewhat pleased with it⊠somewhat⊠it really wasnât good and her fingers were red and sore but she thought it was close enough to a duck⊠maybe not a real duck, maybe more like one of those rubber duck thingies. âItâs niceâ she flinched and looked up, letting out a scoff as she looked back at the duck thingie, shrugging before looking back up at Aaron âyeah, no, itâs notâ she muttered with a scoff, putting her knife back in itâs sheath on the side of her thigh before getting up, blowing some of the wood chips off of the duck, looking at it as she rolled it in her palm, inspecting all angles while walking with Aaron. âI think itâs good.â
âYeah⊠I donât know, Iâve never whittled anything beforeâ she admitted, Aaron smirking a little âthen itâs really good.â
âHere. For Gracieâ Daisy stated with a soft smile, offering it to Aaron who gladly took it âthanks, sheâll love itâ he stated and she nodded, the two of them going back to the bridge and Daisy saw him off before taking out her bow and arrow âIâm going to see if I can hunt anything, our food storage is pretty lowâ she said and he nodded âbe safe out there.â
âYou too, donât get a nail through your hand or drop a hammer on your toe or whateverâ she called and he scoffed before joining up with Daryl, the two of them going back to working on the bridge while Aaron began to talk about a time where Gracieâs diaper exploded or something. It wasnât long until she returned with a few squirrels, it wasnât enough to feed all of them but it was something. She didnât want to over hunt, the wildlife needed time to reproduce and fill the forest, which is why she mostly stuck to hunting the small creatures, in all honesty it was just an excuse for her so she could be alone for a little while. As she returned, a fight broke out, Daisy immediately dropping the squirrels to hurry over, pushing past everyone and joining Rick in standing in between her uncle and Justin, nearing her uncle âheâs not worth itâŠâ she spoke quietly and he looked at her, his heart instantly calming and despite his scoff, he agreed, spitting out some blood and she cringed at the sight, turning to glare at Justin with hatred, even more so when he just smirked at her. She scoffed and shook her head, walking over to pick her squirrels back up before wandering off, not even glancing at him, he wasnât worth it.
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Daisy was panting as she hurried up the hill, bow ready as she fired arrow after arrow, spinning her head around, turning from side to side so fast itâs a wonder she didnât snap her neck in the process, her eyes scanning the sea of walkers and people until she saw him. She bolted towards her uncle as he helped Aaron walk and run, her eyes widening when she saw his arm. âHoly shit!â
âDaisy!â
âSorryâ she muttered to Aaron after her uncleâs scolding. The situation was bad enough already, it didnât help that she pointed out how obviously messed up Aaronâs arm was. She hurriedly put her bow away and got out her knife, kicking away a walker and killing it as she helped get them back to camp, hurrying ahead of them once they reached the camp, reaching Enid first. âEnid!â
âDaisy? What-â
âItâs Aaron, his arm-... I think you have to remove itâ Daisy admitted and Enid turned pale, making Daisy hurry inside âEnid, you can do this. You have to do this! For Aaron. His arm is-... y-youâll see and if you think you can save it then save it, but I donât think itâs possible, not even for Siddiqâ she admitted and Enid nodded hesitantly before turning around to gather the things she needed and find the book sheâd use as a guide.
Daryl dragged Aaron into the tent, putting him down on the cot and Enid handed him a piece of rope while she examined the arm, looking up at Daisy and giving her a nod, making Daisy hurry out of the tent, looking around the forest ground before finding a thick, sturdy looking branch, hurrying inside and giving it to her uncle who tied it on top of another knot around Aaronâs arm, Daryl twisting the branch until there was a dent in Aaronâs arm and then a little more, Daisy hurrying up to the head of the cot where Aaron was, helping hold him down while Daryl kept the tourniquette secure as Enid began to saw through the mangled arm, Daisyâs face contorted into a look of horror and sympathy for Aaron as she held him down while he screamed.
After it was done, Daryl secured the tourniquette before leaving, Daisy hurrying to Aaronâs side where her uncle had been, looking over her shoulder after him but he was already gone, making her look back at Enid with a frown âmaybe those painkillers now?â she asked in a whisper and Enid snapped out of her semi-frozen state, blinking as she nodded and got up to find the painkillers, Aaron looking up at Daisy, pale and sweaty and shaking. âT-Th-hank youâ he muttered and Daisy nodded, stepping aside a little to allow Enid to administer the painkillers through his right arm, the one that wasnât mangled and cut in half. After a little while Enid loosened the tourniquette and Daisy helped remove all the gauze thatâd been stuffed up against the wound to stop most of the bleeding, Enid turning on the propane torch and Daisy helped hold Aaron down as she burn the stump to cauterize the wound, Daisy helping in bandaging it up once more before sighing.
âWeâve gotta find you something cool. Like a mace or somethingâ Daisy joked casually and Aaron scoffed with a smirk, his eyes closed and he looked exhausted âmaybe a swordâ he mumbled and Daisy smirked âmaybe. I still think a mace would be cooler, thoughâ she admitted with a shrug and Aaron scoffed again, only this time it was his only reply and Daisy nodded with a smile, standing up and giving Enidâs shoulder a tight squeeze âhey⊠you did a good jobâ she whispered the praise and Enid smiled softly at her as a thanks, watching Daisy leave the tent before looking back at Aaron.
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Daisy was hesitant as she walked down the street, legs feeling uneasy and weak, the palms of her hands sweating, her heart racing, a sick feeling stuck in her, making her feel sick and ill, as though sheâd eaten something poisonous. She kept as much out of sight as possible, keeping to dark corners and bushes whenever someone walked by, slowly making her way towards the cell that she had built with Morgan. She quietly climbed down the steps, kneeling down by the door, using her knife to open it, sliding it in between the door and doorframe, twisting it a little, tipping it to one side and sliding it in, successfully jimmying the lock open. She cast another glance around before sneaking inside, straightening up a little and she slowly walked towards the cell gate, studying his sleeping form in the dark. She looked around the darkness, finding the outline of a chair and she kneeled down, taking off her backpack and looking through it, finding a small lamp she always had with her. She turned it on and put it on the floor, quietly pulling up the chair and sitting down in it, staring at him as he slept, anger building up in her chest. Glenn didnât get to sleep peacefully in a nice bed. Abraham didnât. Sasha didnât. Denise didnât either⊠So finally she had enough, finding an empty tray that food had been on, picking it up, keeping her eyes on him as he slept. She lifted the tray high in the air, holding it out⊠and then dropped it. The sound of it hitting the ground had him sitting up, flinching in shock as he looked around, his heart probably racing and Daisy smirked at the hint of fear she hoped he felt in that moment. âWhat the he-â he cut himself off as he saw who was sitting on the other side of the bars, a small lamp on, standing on the floor, barely enough to illuminate her, casting most of her face in shadows but from what little he could see, she was disturbingly calm.
âWhat the hell, princess-â
âDonâtâ she cut him off, voice calm as she just sat and stared at him and he sighed, sitting up straighter, swinging his legs out over the side of his cot and onto the floor. âAre you here to kill me?â he asked after a long while of silence, studying her and she scoffed, smiling a little as though she found his question amusing. âHere? Now?... noâ she admitted, still smiling as she tilted her head at him âyou donât kill that⊠no⊠not until you try a littleâ she mirrored the words heâd said that night⊠the night he killed Glenn and Abraham, the night he took her uncle, the night he had her uncle pinned to the ground, a crossbow aimed at his head as Negan kneeled down, grabbed her uncle by his hair and lifted his head a little, saying those exact words, and it seemed he hadnât forgotten, his posture getting a little more tense. âIf you want to kill me, just do it-â
âNo. I wonât do anything you say, not anymore. Iâm not going to kill you, Neganâ she said with a quiet laugh âthat would be too easy⊠first, Iâm going to find Lucille, then Iâm going to bring her to you⊠Iâll have you watch as I clip off the barbed wires, one by one,â Negan stood up quickly, his shoulders heaving as he clenched his jaw, anger taking over and she smiled with a hint of victory âthen,â she continued âIâm going to show you just how scarred youâve made her. Iâm going to show you exactly what those barbed wires you wrapped around her did to her-â
âDelilah, I swear, if you fucking touch her-â
â- and then⊠then Iâm going to have you watch as I figure out what to do next⊠maybe I burn her a little⊠maybe I cut off a piece or twoâ she trailed off, staring right at Negan with that sadistic, pleased smile on her lips âyou killed me, Negan⊠you killed my uncle, you killed my friends, my family⊠you tortured my uncle-â
âDwight did that-â
âDwight got what he deservedâ she hissed, tears forming in her eyes out of pure anger âbut he followed your ordersâ she added in a quiet voice. âYou forced me to kill an innocent person, forced me to infect him⊠you forced me to go to a doctor who-... he-... and you knew it!â she snapped at him, a few tears already running down her cheeks âyou knew what he was doing to me and you knew what Davey was doing to me! You knew it! Everyone said that you knew it!... So no, Negan⊠no, Iâm not going to kill you. Not yet. Not until youâve suffered as much as I have. Then, Iâm going to force you to suffer like my uncle. Then youâll suffer like Maggie⊠then you die. Slowly. Painfully. Iâll bite you and watch you turn and once youâre dead and no longer you⊠then Iâll wrap a chain around your neck, take out your teeth, cut off your arms and chain you to a tree like the pathetic mutt that you areâ she hissed, standing up, approaching the bars with anger âthereâs no way out of this, Negan⊠You have one hell of a debt to pay and Iâll make sure you pay it. Down to the very. Last. Pieceâ she spat, spitting at the ground near the bars before kneeling down, turning off her lamp and packing it back up, standing back up to glare at Negan âget some rest, Negan, because soon⊠soon you wonât get any at all, Iâll make sure of thatâ she warned coldly before sneaking out the same way she had sneaked in, taking the long walk back to the camp once sheâd climbed over the wall of Alexandria, hoping to get back before dawn at least. If not, well, then she could always use the excuse that she was hunting early to catch some good game for the camp.
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Daisy felt her heart stuck in her throat as the tension kept building and building, a sense of unease, aside from the obvious, began to settle in her gut and she felt sick⊠like the fever that never came had finally begun to show itself and it didnât help that Justin had finally been found. Dead. Wandering around as a walker. She couldnât help but watch the two opposing crowds, a frown on her brows as she stood a little ways up the hill, surveying the chaos, her hand on her gun, ready to draw it if needed. âHey, why arenât you in bed restinâ?â Daryl asked as he spotted her, walking closer to her, opening his mouth to ask again when he noticed what had brought her over, the chaos and arguing, and he could see how nervous it made her. Hell, he could practically feel the anxiety rolling off of her in waves.
âHey, we donât want this, okay? We just need to protect ourselves-â
âNo guns!â Daryl shouted out in reply, people turning to look at him and Daisy, who looked up at him, his eyes moving to his niece, a silent reassurance in them and Daisy felt a little more at ease.
âThat âcause youâre the one who took out Justin?... Nah, my moneyâs on garbage lady.â
âRevenge for Simonâs play, sureâ another Savior muttered and Daisy scoffed âif thatâs really what youâd put your money on, then itâs sure as shit lucky that youâre not actually gambling any money, thenâ Daisy called out, the man scoffing at her âwhy? You did it? Werenât you out last night? I saw you come back just at dawn. You said it was hunting⊠you killed him, didnât you?!â
âNo, I didnât. And she didnât eitherâ Daisy replied sternly, Daryl feeling a hint of pride in his chest before he forced himself to focus on the situation instead, and not on how proud he was of how much sheâd grown. âNo. Itâs him. Finishing what he startedâ another called out, nodding towards Daryl and Daisy scoffed, already shaking her head and Daryl smirked a little at how well she knew him. She didnât even have to look at him, not even a glance. She knew he wasnât stupid enough to do that. He mightâve been as dumb as rocks compared to her (in his opinion), but he wasnât that stupid. Daisy felt her muscles tighten as she watched him walk over to an ax leaning against a tree, her eyes moving to her uncle, an attempt to figure out what she should do, when she watched him get his crossbow ready. She let go of her gun in itâs holster, carefully and slowly taking out her bow instead as one of the other Saviors seemed to try and stop the ones taking up arms âstop. Itâs gonna get too far-â
âIt wonâtâ Daisy replied loudly, pulling an arrow out of the quiver on her back, putting it on the bowstring, ready to draw the string back as her uncle raised his crossbow. âMaybe it was all three of themâ the man who had started everything muttered, beginning to advance when Rick appeared, on a horse no less, cutting the two groups off from each other and Daisy felt herself grow a little less tense, her eyes moving to her uncle briefly before she looked back at Rick as he shouted, telling everyone to get back. As everyone began to move away to return to work, Rick turned around on the horse, looking at Daryl and Daisy who both looked back at him. It was obvious that both of them still resented his choice of keeping Negan alive, but Daisy was clearly a little happier to see him than her uncle was.
âGo on, get sumâ rest, aâight?â
âIâm fine-â she was cut off as the back of his hand gently touched her forehead, making her sigh heavily and roll her eyes as she let him take her temperature. âNah, go onâ he ordered and she was about to argue when he raised a single brow at her, silently challenging her and she sighed and left. Her fingers were raw and calloused from all the whittling sheâd done while ârestingâ.
#the walking dead#twd#daryl dixon#daisy marston#delilah marston#TWD fanfic#The Walking Dead fic#The Days Ahead#The Days Ahead-Resting#Rick Grimes#Maggie Rhee#Michonne
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Working on the next chapter of From Russia with Begrudging Acceptance⊠hereâs a small sneak peek since it might be a minute before I can post anything. Work is going to be crazy for me for a few weeks but Iâm still trying to write when I get a chance!
***
Meeting mission Yelena was both an arousing and terrifying experience for Kate. Her girlfriend was focused on coming up with the best plan possible which would quickly accomplish everything with the least amount of people needing to be involved. Watching Yelena give the orders, standing at the white board was intoxicating enough but watching her sweat while kicking the absolute shit out of Peter was the most erotic thing Kate had ever witnessed with her own eyes. She was patiently waiting her turn for a go on mats but frowned when a voice called just beside her ear, âcareful Kate Bishop if you drool anymore Iâll have to bring out a caution wet floor sign.â
Kateâs cheeks reddened while she quickly moved her thumb across her bottom lip to make sure she wasnât actually drooling onto the training room floor. âWhat are you doing here?â She turned to see a familiar shit eating smirk that all former widows seemed accustomed to wearing.
âItâs your lucky day,â Sonyaâs eyes glanced towards her partner right as she delivered a roundhouse kick which the boy surprisingly avoided just to get punched in the gut. âYou and me, shooting day.â
âWhy do I have to do the gun training when Iâll be using my bow,â Kate said petulantly as the thought of leaving the area was unpleasant.
âDo you want to question Yelenaâs plans? We can go over the schedule together again if youâd like but Iâm sure you remember how well that turned out,â another smirk forming.
Oh, Kate definitely remembered seeing how it was only three days ago. It was their second day of training and apparently Kate was feeling particularly bratty that day.
*2 days priorâŠ*
Yelena had set up a training circuit for Peter and Kate to go through which included a series of different weapons from physical combat, guns, knives, and included a section for both of their weapons of choice. âYes, Iâm talking about your buttlace and your arrows. Sonya and I will be in there to attack at various points plus there are holographic enemies set up throughout the course. The technology is crazy at this place,â Yelena had let slip.
âSo the Avengers do impress you,â Kate smirked.
Peter elbowed her, âplease donât piss off Ms. Belova before she starts shooting at us.â
âShe wonât actually hurt us,â Kate rolled her eyes. âItâs only rubber rounds or pepper bullets.â
âHave you ever gotten hit with a rubber round?â Yelena laughed at the audacity of her girlfriend.
âNo but how bad could it be?â
âThat seems like a challenge to me,â Sonya laughed. âPermission for full contact?â She had turned to Yelena who simply nodded. She turned to her partner and whispered something into her ear which had Kateâs heart racing.
Yelena offered a deep chuckle, staring directly at her girlfriend. âThe two of you will be working together to make it to the target before the time limit. If you fail, you do it until you clear the course. If you submit, you repeat the course. If you get shot, well⊠I think you get the point. Any questions?â Peter raised his hand, âgood.â Yelena ignored him, âyou have ten minutes to come up with a game plan. When the buzzer sounds, the doors open and your time starts. You have thirty minutes to complete the course.â She turned to look at her girlfriend, âwatch out for the rubber rounds, little hawk.â
Yelena and Sonya went into the simulator, leaving Kate and Peter in the briefing room. âYour girlfriend is very intimidating. I hope I get attacked by Sonya. I think sheâll go easy on me.â
âI think I fucked up again,â Kate swallowed anxiously, looking at the two widows staring at them from inside the door before they left the area. âIâm sorry for your future pain, Peter. I owe you dinner or something, probably many ice packs and icy hot.â
Peter pulled up the map of the course on the interactive table, âletâs plan this out. We need to get this on the first try. I donât know how many beating I can take today.â He started to trace out a path noting all of the hiding areas leading to the target. They came up with a solid plan. Kate was going low with a full quiver of arrows and Peter was going to take the high road, pointing out blocks in their plan. They had their coms in their ears and were standing outside the doors waiting for the buzzer. âYou donât really think sheâs going to shoot you, do you?â
Kate took a few breaths, âI have no doubt that she will absolutely shoot me the shit out of me.â
#bishova fanfic#bishova#bishlova#kate x yelena#katelena#katelena fanfic#kate bishop#yelena mcu#yelena x kate#hawkeye series#hawkeye tv
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Refrain, chapter two - a Malevolent fic (The start of Surrogate, season two!)

Kayne's "season one" ended with a choice: whichever father Faroe picked, he was ready to let that slingshot fire.
She picked Arthur. Well, that was nice, wasn't it? Especially since he'd spent almost a year pulling that rubber band back, loaded.
Of course, he had no idea how well it would work. Humans are weird, and pieces of Hastur seem to respond particularly well to prolonged exposure.
It was time to deny a wicked man his prize.
Time to give a good man a second chance and see what he did with it.
Time to take the abused piece of a god and find out how it changed when given to someone else.
Part of Surrogate, a Malevolent AU. Written with @sepiabandensis.
AO3 (chapter two)
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âGo on, snarl away,â Larson drawled in that infuriating tone he had for when heâd made Yellow extremely upset and cared not one whit about it. âRage all you want, little one. Iâll be here when your tantrum is over.â
How DARE you, Yellow roared. I am a GOD, you miserable insect! You will bow your head in reverence, you will honor me as I speak!
âYou ainât done a damn thing to earn that,â Larson said, and Yellow did not need a mirror to know he was smilingâthat insufferable fucking smirk that he used when he thought he had the upper hand. âFor a god, you ainât got a whole lot of bite to that bark.â
I will make you fucking suffer, Yellow snarled. I will rip the skin from your body and craft a suit for you to wear of it, I willâ
âThen do it,â Larson drawled.
Yellow went silent, shocked.
âYouâre the big, scary god,â Larson said, and he stretched his hand out, rolling his wrist. âGo on, then. You said you had Arthurâs eyes? Take mine. Take my hand. I wonât even fight you. I just want to see if you can do it.â
Yellow roared, pouring all of his power into the effort, searching out nerves orâor blood vessels, orâ
âIâm waitinâ,â Larson drawled.
His power found no purchase, slipping off of Larsonâs body like oil over the surface of water. Yellow went quiet.
Larson laughed, rolling his wrist again, touching each of his fingers to his thumb. âThatâs what I thought.â
It doesnâtâ Yellow said, voice halting. I donâtâ
âOh, I know, I know. The âfragmented soul of a godâ schtick.â He turned his hand over, flexing the palm. âNot much of a god, if you canât even take a willing host, hm?â
Yellow remained silent.
âNow, let's go and experiment with that ritual you mentioned. I think a bit of blood will open up some of that power and maybe get us somewhere.â
Yellow didnât answer. He didnât have to: he knew Larson had won that battle.
Just one of many, many to come.
#
Watch out! Now!
Yellow wasnât helping, but he wasnât hurting, either, and Parker was too focused to reply. He ran.
By this time, a few coppers were up on the rooftops with him. The thugs stayed down below, occasionally shooting when they thought they got the chance.
Parker was absolutely sure Larson would pitch a fit if he knew they were doing that.
âStop!â called some breathless copper back there, but Parker did not.
Heâd been afraid that ten years dead would leave him weak, less in shape than heâd been, but no: whatever else that Outer God had done, heâd left him fucking fit, and so Parker kept running.
The snow slowed him down. He slid a lot; caught himself in the nick of time more than once on a chimney or pipe, and kept going.
Laughing.
Because this was fucking great.
The air was freezing. The ice had cut his skin all over. And he was outrunning the world.
Theyâd get him eventually, he knew. A lucky bullet, or a patch of ice. Heâd run out of roof, or these idiots would get their act together and pincer him. But until then?
Until then, he ran like a mountain goat, and cackled like a wolf.
So far, against all odds, heâd gotten away with it.
Look out!
More shooting.
âWest! Heâs going west!â shouted cops.
He wasnât going to make it, but at least heâd try. Heâd already been dead, anyway. This kind of death was way more his style than how it went the first time. âGot a do-over,â he breathed, rounding a chimney.
What?
âAll we need now is that ticket to Carcosa!â he laughed. âWe could take the ferry!â
The tickets would cost too much! A beat. That was a joke!
âSolid fucking work!â Parker approved, braced himself, and jumped.
He barely made this one. Theyâd gone too far downtown, away from the tenements, from the poorer, crowded housing. He wouldnât make the next roof. His lead was small, but it would have to do. He started trying doors. Most of these places had exits onto the roof, and he spotted three more before the next alleyâbefore the gap he couldnât jump. Heâd try climbing to the ground, or even into a window, but the goons would shoot him. Parker tried another door. Nope.
Shouts still followed them, gasping coppers and wicked goons, closing in. He tried a door.
It opened.
Parker didnât hesitate. He threw himself inside.
#
His breathing was loud, but there was no way around that. It wouldnât take them long to figure out he was in here, so he tore down the stairwell, skipping steps, jumping onto landings. If he could get out a back way and get around them somehowâ
Couldnât ask for help from strangers. Not with war going.
âChances of this working out are one in a million, buddy!â He opted to try for a second story fire escape, hoping to catch a glimpse of where things lay before making this move. âHowâs our luck looking?â
We should have been caught before we even left the estate, Yellow said, voice frantic, but there was a sort of wild mania about it, like Parkerâs desperate laughter had become infectious. IâI am a god! It is my will that our luck is good! And he let out a howling laugh. I decree it! I command that it bend to our will, to change!
Parker laughed. âThatâs the spirit! Ought'a take you with me any time I bet on the ponies.â And he peeked.
He could hear them down thereânot in this alley, but around it, too near. The voices echoed; which damn side were they on?
He decided to assume both.
It was starting to get dark now; theyâd been at this for hours. He wondered if he could trick them into thinking heâd gotten further away. If he could make it to the building across the way, he could maybe get through it to the other side, unseen, and further away from this cordon. They knew he couldnât jump that distance. Maybe, just maybe, theyâd focus on this building, giving him time.
Or maybe heâd still be caught the second he stuck his nose out.
Well. That was a possibility, either way. Parker made up his mind. âWeâre gonna move,â he said very quietly. âWeâre gonna head toward the river. They got culverts and shit down there. Might have a chance to lose them.â
A good idea. The water could disguise our scent, lose our footprints, Yellow said.
âOh, our scentâll be disguised, all right. Itâs gross in thereâbut you can really lose a guy. Been part of more than one manhunt that went wrong thanks to that kind of mess underground. Itâs risky⊠but I figure itâll be risky for everybody, not just us. You in?â
Iâm in. Yellow rumbled softly. I feel like I remember something about the underground, here. About tunnels. Tunnels can go many places, Parker. Another pause. But I donât remember. Iâm sorry.
âDonât need to be, pal. Feel it with me, if you can: sucks that we might die, might get caught, might get hurt, but this is a fucking great way to do it. We are alive. You get it? More than any fuck just sitting in an office somewhere. You feel me?â
Parker⊠His voice was hesitant, full of disquiet. You⊠I do not have the power to⊠help, if all goes south. You might die.
âPal, Iâve been dead. Iâm gonna die anyway, someday, no matter how this goes. It doesnât scare me as much as dying with regret âcause I didnât live.â
I donât want you to die, Yellow said softly. And I especially donât want you to die for nothing, Parker.
âItâs okay, pal. I promised Iâd try, so Iâm gonna. If they do get us, it wonât be because we werenât balls to the wall trying.â He watched. He counted voices, and did his best to identify location. Some were still above, shouting to each other. They still thought he was on the roof; this was the time to go. Parker took the fire escape down, heart pounding, and raced across to peek onto the sidewalk.
Luck was with them: they had a brief moment where the search party wasnât here, wasnât looking, wasnât present. He ran all-out into the building beside him and started making his way back uptown.
#
Gophers, thatâs what he was thinking of, and he laughed.
What is it? said Yellow, who sounded a bit tired.
Parker was more than a bit tired. He was fucking ragged; his coat was torn, the hat was long gone (and he hoped whoever found it needed a new one), and he was damned hungry. New bruises bloomed, visible and otherwise; the one copper whoâd caught him had not been a lightweight, and managed to get cuffs on one wrist before Parker took him down.
And now that heâd taken a copper down, there was definitely no going back. Damn, these bruises sang. âJust thinking of what this is like from the outside,â he said. âGophers.â He wiped sweat from his brow. The cuff on his wrist was too tight; he held the loose end lightly so he wouldnât catch it on anything. Stupid copper, losing the key when they struggled.
They were nearly there.
Gophers? Said Yellow, sounding offended at the word.
âYeah. Ducking into buildings, popping out again. Try to catch a gopher, and he goes under, and pops up in another hole out of reach.â
Oh. Yellow didnât seem to think it was as funny, but that was fine. How much farther?
âMy friend, we are one fucking street away from the slope down to the riverâbut from here out, thereâs no cover. Hanging in there? I need you with me, pal.â
I am with you. He hesitated. I struggle to believe weâve made it this far.
âYou know, me, too? But Iâm loving it. Heh. They ainât never gonna forget this little runaround.â
Nevah, repeated Yellow, who every once in a while tried on Parkerâs accent for size.
âRule of thumb: canât stop the bad guys? At least cost âem so much they regret it.â He breathed deeply, slowly, preparing for this race. Shouting men still called to one another behind him, and nearby; Larson himself had yet to make an appearance, but Parker knew he was around. Just felt it. His instinct was never wrong.
(Though maybe it had been about Arthur? No⊠no. Shit happened to that guy. Instinct couldnât predict that.)
A pyrrhic victory. I⊠I can understand this, yes.
âReady?â said Parker. âThree.â
Three.
âTwo.â
Two!
âThere he is!â some guy shouted from behind, and Parker ran for his life.
They shot at him, but they were dumb enough (and he was lucky enough) that they tried shooting while running instead of just standing still, and they mostly missed. He hurled himself down the hill toward the Hudson river and pounded along the steep bank. One of those culverts was dead ahead, built into the earth, dark and scary and nasty.
It would be cold as the devilâs ass in here.
Well, always wanted to kick somebody important where the sun donât shine, he thought, and aimed himself for it.
He was right: the water was fucking cold.
I can taste it, Yellow complained, because it was trueâthe fug in here was thick.
No, YOU fucking go after him echoed behind them, and Parker laughed as he plunged wildly into the dark and hoped he wouldnât break his damn neck.
#
Some gutter provided enough light for Parker to get a look at his side. The bullet had gone through, so he was right about that; but the damn thing hadnât stopped bleeding, which heâd assumed it would.
It was one of those annoying wounds that only started hurting when he really got his eyes on it.
Yellow gasped. Parker!
âEasy. Weâre not done. This just⊠fuck.â Not done yet, but this needed a doctor. Parker didnât know one in New York he could go to. In Arkham, sure. Ten years ago.
He wasnât so sure theyâd be amenable to him now. Fuck.
âNothing for it,â he muttered, balling up the coat and pressing it against the wound (and wow, that hurt) as he continued on.
It looks bad, Yellow moaned, doing nothing to help Parker take his mind off the injury. Iâm⊠I canât⊠Iâm sorry. I⊠Our luck will hold. His voice grew firm. I demand it. Our luck will hold. Where are they?
The water had long numbed his feet; the smells were⊠really not worth considering. But the important thing was the voices of their pursuers, while occasionally still popping up, had yet to catch up.
Parker, where are we?
âThis point? No idea. Not far enough, though, I can tell you that.â
I concur. I will be much happier when I cannot hear them at all. But this⊠itâs certainly not nearly as exciting as jumping across rooftops. Are we still âliving?â
âWe sure are, buddy.â Parker meant it, and answered without hesitation. âWe get outta this, this part here? Is gonna make the best part of our story.â
Even though itâs just wading through shit in the dark?
âYep.â He followed the line of light from various storm drains. This meant they were under some kind of main road, but heâd lost his sense of direction almost immediately getting in here (and knew part of that was going into shock, thanks to whichever lucky son of a bitch got him), and had absolutely no idea where they were. âThis is gonna make the best part of our story.â
You said that already. Are you alright?
Fuck. He had. Parker stopped, bent over, and breathed for a minute. âFocus,â he said to himself. âCome on. Just a little further.â
But we donât know that. How can you know that?
âItâs not about knowing it. Itâs about believing it so I donât lie down and give up.â And he did neither.
#
This didnât really seem like a New York City sewer anymore.
He couldnât say why. Maybe it was the distant sound of crashing water, like some crazy waterfall. Maybe it was the fact that the scents had changed; it wasnât shit anymore. It was three things, alternating: sort of a soil smell, vegetation gone bad, and a meat smell.
That smell worried him. It didnât seem real sewery. It seemed more⊠jungle. Like maybe there was some meat-eating thing down here.
âThereâs rumors,â he said.
What?
âRumors of alligators in the sewers. I mean. Canât be. It gets cold, and theyâre cold-blooded. But funny, right?â
Parker. Why would you bring this up now?
âDonât you smell that? Itâs real weird.â
Meat? Yellow blurted.
âYep. Maybe weâre near a slaughterhouse? But no, I know weâre not.â
Meat⊠said Yellow, thoughtful. Meat. Why would there be meat in a sewer? That doesnât make sense. The only thing I can think ofâŠ
He suddenly went very quiet.
âBuddy?â
Parker, how do people⊠care for their dead, in New York City?
âSame way they do most places, I guess. Bury âem in the cemetery.â He thought for a moment. âI guess we got in here not too far from Trinity Church cemetery. Not sure where we are now, but⊠yeah. Cemeteries. Used to be lots of them here. They got paved over for buildings and shit. Why?â
I⊠underground, in the Dreamlands, I remember there are⊠creatures, sometimes. They often eat the dead. I am unsure if you also have them here, but I would recommend caution, if you smell meat. No matter how fresh.
âEat theâŠâ Parker took a moment to process that one and stopped walking. âGuess thatâs⊠efficient, huh?â His brow knit. âWe donât have those here. But then, youâre here, arenât you?â
I was brought by magic, Yellow said, almost defensively. But yes. Larson could call upon many sorts of creatures on his own. These creatures, though⊠thereâs a memory, but I cannot grasp it. I know something. His voice surged. I know something, Parker, but I donât know what it is! I donât⊠I donât remember.
âItâs okay, buddy. Itâs okay. Weâll handle it.â Lower: âDonât suppose you remember how dangerous they might be to living people.â
They were not dangerous to me, Yellow said with a hint of a whine. But⊠they⊠They were rational! They are rational, and can be communicated with. Theyâre not animals, Parker. We might⊠There was another heavy, meaningful pause. We might be able to convince them to take on our pursuers. Or, at the very least, lead them awayâif we have something to offer.
âAll I got on me is a bloody shirt, a coat, and the rock I picked up in the park. But hey; I can talk. Maybe we can figure something out.â Because Parker was sure something this weird would happen, here, under New York City, with a piece of a god in his head.
Stranger things have been offered in trade, and stranger things still have been accepted, Yellow said.
âWe got this. And either way, I donât know anybody else who saw corpse-eating guys under a city, so itâs an adventure.â And he walked forward.
He wasnât trying to be overly quiet now, though he was listening sharply. If these things could be reasoned with, he didnât want it to seem like he was trying to sneak up.
The damn wound was still bleeding. Sluggishly, but he was pretty sure it needed to be sewn shut. âIf thereâs anybody here,â he said, just a pinch louder, âIâm open for trade.â Lower: âAnd if not, Iâm gonna fucking bash your head in if you try shit.â
Right on cue there was a sound like a dog taking a sharp, deep sniff.
Fuck.
Parker saw its eyes glinting in the hollow of a branching tunnel, glowing red in the dim light like a wolfâs. It stayed in the shadows, hunched, head tiltingâand it sniffed again, deep. âYou smell strange. Like a human, but also like the newly-food. You are not newly-food.â
The creature took a cautious step forward on its knucklesâits face was long, mouth jutting out like a snout, pointed ears perked forward, and its lips peeled back from its pale face in a hyena-like grimace. âI can smell your blood, human. What are you doing here?â
A ghoul, Yellow said softly.
Parker thought to himself that it was a damn good thing heâd had a lot of practice keeping his expression neutral. âWeâre lost, friend. Not a super-fun situation, to be honest. Could use some help, if youâre up for it. I donât have a lot to trade, but Iâm willing.â
The ghoul tilted its head, like a dog hearing an interesting sound. âLost? But youâre found, now. I can make you less lost, perhaps.â It slunk around the edge of the light from a manholeâParker could see it move, the shape of a man hunched over and walking on long, clawed arms and legs with ankle and knee out of proportion, and clad in what looked to be a torn and heavily altered pair of pinstriped pants.
This thing probably knew his heart rate picked up, but there was nothing he could do about that. âThat sounds like a good deal. I can trade you some info for sure. Uh. Not sure what else Iâve got.â He offered a crooked grin, hoping it read human facial expressions. âIâm not exactly bargaining from the best position here, so I hope youâve got some kindness in ya.â
It sniffed at him again. âAnother smell. A strange smell. Hm.â It sat back on its haunches, the pants creaking. âBut where to? Lost is relative if you have no map. Up, or down?â
Parker, Yellow said softly. I remember now. Ghouls⊠Theyâre from the Dreamlands. I told you. I think this one knows how to get there.
There was the sound of a muffled curse, echoing and faint from down the tunnel. The ghoulâs ears flicked toward it, its eyes focusing hard on the tunnel.
Or, Yellow said, his voice thin and hesitant. Or⊠We could⊠get out. Find a way out of New York.
âIt is cold,â the ghoul said, eyeing Parkerâor, specifically, his coat. âI take you, up or down, and you give me the coat. Yes?â
It was a choice. Like that poem Arthur always used to quoteâsomething about two paths in a yellow wood.
Parker knew Earth, or at least New England. Chances were, he could get help hereâpeople who knew him well enough not to think he was somehow working for the enemy.
But on the other hand⊠a new world. An entirely new oneâand, well. Heâd promised Yellow. His gut said that really mattered. âFree advice first,â he said. âBunch of goons looking through here with guns, and theyâll shoot. So stay out of their way.â And he held up the coat. âItâs got my blood on it. That a problem?â
âMmm⊠foolish. We will be gone before these goons catch us.â It snorted. âThe others will keep their distance. We crave no trouble. But your trust is noted.â Very gingerly it stretched out a hand, feeling the thick wool. âBlood is blood. It matters not to me. In time its scent will fade, and be but a memoryâthe stain shall remind me of your kindness. I accept. Up, or down?â
Parker was sharply aware of Yellowâs silence. âWhich one gets me to the Dreamlands?â
Yellow gasped.
His gut had been right: this mattered.
âDown,â the ghoul said. âBrave man. Foolish man. But⊠the scent did not lie.â
The voices grew louder. The ghoulâs head snapped towards the tunnel.
âWe go now,â it said, turning and loping into a side tunnel. âThe coat you will give in time.â
âThanks.â Brave and foolishâyeah, that sounded about right. He was okay with those descriptors. Parker followed at once, trying to step where this thing stepped.
Parker, Yellow whispered. Are you sure? Weâre going to the Dreamlands?
âYeah,â he murmured softly. âSaid I would. This guyâs our ticket.â Damn, the goons were closer than heâd thoughtâand they werenât exactly quiet. He might, he thought, have bled more than heâd realized. That was going to be a problem.
A problem for this Dreamlands place. He debated asking about Carcosa. Debated if that would be giving too much away. Decided to see where this new friend chose to drop him instead.
The ghoul stopped at a t-junction, pausing to paw at the wall. Bricks began to come free, tumbling to the ground and splashing in the sluggish, dark water at the bottom of the sewers. Piece by piece, a tunnel was revealed, large enough for Parker to walk through with only the barest stoop, the edges of it roughly clawed out, but smoothed by the passage of time and bodies.
The voices sounded off again. Arguments about splitting up.
The ghoulâs ears pinned, and it let out a soft growl. âThe coat, please.â
Parker handed it over at once. âI owe you more than a coat, man. Thank you. Anything I should know before going through?â
It took it, petting the fabric with its hand. âYou will be in the Underworld. It is not a place for you. There are stairs. Climb them to the light, and you will be free.â And then its head snapped forward, sniffing at Parkerâs side. âAnd find a healer. Your blood turns to poison by the minute.â
I⊠If we can get to the surface, I might remember. I will remember something, Parker. Iâll get you to safety.
âYeah, running through sewers fucked upâll do that to you.â Parker grinned wryly. âThey got guns. Someone might have magic. Good luck. And thanks.â He didnât have a hat to tip, but he could salute, and did.
Then he dove in.
Behind them he could hear bricks being shoved haphazardly back into place, cutting off the last vestiges of light.
He couldnât see super-well, but down was hopefully enough of a warning.
#
It felt like days before the slope evened out again, and Parker suddenly stumbled into a massive chamber that echoed with every shocked step. It was dark but for a faint gray light that clung to everything like mist, the temperature cool, but not freezingâa stark change from the sewers of New York.
Yellow let out another soft gasp.
The ceiling was far above them, dark as pitch and featureless but for the faint cracks and spots of light that speckled its surface, like lonely embers of a scattered fire. In the distance, he could see what looked like mountains, lit with the foxfire glow of whatever the fuck went on in this underground area, and he could see what looked like some sort of black-stone city at the base of one of them, andâŠ
The stairs, Parker, Yellow said. There! We can get to the surface, and find a healer. Are you ready?
Parker made one small noise. It wasnât a laugh or a sob; it was something else, just some raw emotion, and he wiped his leaking eyes. âIâm in another world, buddy. Me. Fuckinâ Parker Yang from Boston.â Then he shook himself. âYeah. Stairs. Thisâll be fun, Iâm sure.â He felt too much wonder to flip into true sarcasm. âLetâs do this.â
Pahkah Yang, from Bahston. Private Eye. Adventurer. It was almost a delirious laugh. Iâm almost home. Weâre almost there, Parker.
He could tell his lungs were a little less efficient from blood lossâbut âhealerâ sounded promising. âIâll get you there, buddy, if it takes my last breath.â And he couldnât help saying it. âFunny, huh? All that time, all those years, all those sacrifices. and Larson couldâa just asked and gotten you home like that.â
There was a deep, heavy silence.
I suppose I had to wait for someone with competence, Yellow finally said, voice soft and hesitantâlike he was asking permission.
âHeh. Heâs competent plentyâbut I think he meant to keep you. We got this, you and me. I wanna see this shining jewel of a city you talked about.â He wiped his eyes again. âGuess I had to die to get a chance at a better life. Go figure.â
I will ensure you are rewarded, in whichever way you prefer. The Dreamlands would bend to someone of your talentsâbut if you want to go home, when all is done, I will see what I can do. Yellow paused for a moment. I rather like you, Parker. I will see to it I keep my promise as well.
âThatâs real sweet of you, kid. Appreciate it.â Parker stumbledânot enough to fall, or tumble down, but enough that he had to kneel for a moment and catch his breath. âSo, just connected to nothing, how do we find a healer? And, uh, can I do dishes or something to pay them?â
The nearest town should have oneâand if weâre especially lucky they will be a Cana, and will help us regardless of our ability to pay. If not, they may have us do some tasks for them in exchange: there are many different kingdoms in the Dreamlands, and not all accept the same coin. A deep sigh. I would settle for a traveling bard, even. Weâve one hell of a story to tell, and most of them know at least some minor magics.
âWe do have a hell of a story! See? Itâs already paying off.â He took a moment and breathed, then resumed, this time at a slower pace, but one he could keep steady. His sweat had gone cold. He knew his body was giving out, but they were almost there. âMagic seems real handy to know. Maybe we should learn some.â
I would use magic now, if I was certain it wouldnât kill you, Yellow said. Are you alright? Youâre stumbling. Our mouth feels strange.
âIâve been bleeding for a while, buddy. Human bodies are kinda dumb that wayâthey lose too much juice and they go all wacky.â His new pace seemed to be the right plan. âSo magic would kill me, huh?â
Without the attunement process, chances are high. Do you need to stop and rest? There was real fear in the voice now. Larson never⊠He never got hurt, from what I could see. Other people took risks for him.
âYeah, thatâs rich-guy shit for you. Guys like us have to do the work ourselves.â He took a moment to answer the first question. âDonât think itâs a good idea to stop here. Feels like weâd be⊠dunno. Setting ourselves up.â
Youâre right. Yellow somehow took a deep breath without lungs. Magic. Letâs talk about magic, then. Humans can use it, but you have to work up to it. Too much would kill you right awayâfrom what you described, I would have thought thatâs what had happened to Arthur, though it seems as though something else entirely happened instead. But you⊠I donât know. I would have to introduce you to magic slowly, to make sure it didnât burn your blood to cinders if I tried to heal you. Do you want to learn magic, Parker?
He finally stopped walking so he could laugh, leaning on the wall. âFucking hell, buddy⊠went from, âhey, turns out you got a soul after all, and hey, thereâs gods,â to âdo you wanna be a wizardâ real fast, didnât we?â He continued laughing as he resumed his climb.
Oh, you donât wish to be the great Pahkah tha Wise? Content with being Pahkah tha Brave?
He laughed again. âWise? Donât know I ever got called that before. Hey, you know what? Weâre in this all the way. All the way to Carcosa, and whatever happens there. Tell you what: you think I can learn magic? I could learn how to heal shit. Thatâd make life a hell of a lot easier.â
If I attuned you to magic, I could heal you. And yes, that would make everything much, much easier. He rumbled a bit. I think⊠Yes, I think you could use magic with responsibility.
Parker took a moment to breathe; it sounded thick and labored. âYou wonât be pissed if I canât do it, right?â
No, I would hardly hold it against you if you were unable to use magic. It is the get of gods, not mortalsâthe talent of even those most skilled mortals pales in comparison to the weakest of the true gods. If you were unable, I could still cast through you once you had been attuned. I had to, for some spells that were too big for Larson, much like the ritual he and I were conducting when you arrived.
âSounds like you were real useful to him.â There was no censure in this. It was just a statement; and yet, like many of his recent words regarding Larson, it carried strange weight.
Just a pinch quieter, Yellow added, And will you be angry with me? If I cannot will the stars to move, or turn mortal flesh incorruptible?
Parker snorted. âKid, Iâm just happy weâre alive. You turn water to wine, or just keep some damn bread soft, itâll be enough for me. HeyâWhat was that ritual for, anyway? The one that blew up and got me involved.â
There was that hesitation again. Fear tinted Yellowâs answer. The ritual we performed was meant to contact another Great Old One so we could broker a deal with them, offer sacrifices for power. Power for Larson, to handle the spells that it would require for me to ascend to something more like my other half; power for me, to bolster and feed the magic through Larson as well. He had⊠there were many who followed him who would slit their own throats at his command. Some of them would even do so eagerly.
âShit. No wonder you wanted to go back. Sounds like you were halfway to your goal.â He looked up. There was an exit up thereâa pinpoint, bright, still, and tiny. Parker clenched his jaw. He could do this. Slower, he kept climbing. âThose poor saps. They didnât even get shit out of it, did they?â
For Larson, most people are merely a means to an end. To an extent, I believe he and I were this to each other, too. Though slightly less glamorous, this is a far more direct way to achieve what I want, so I am certainly glad for your interruption. Yellow noticed the point of light as well, letting out a soft gasp. Weâre almost there, Parker. You are truly magnificent, did you know that?
Parker snorted. âIâm just stubborn as hell, buddy. Thatâs not magnificent.â His breathing was wet. âAlmost wish we had run into him. Might like to see if heâs got a glass jaw.â
Iâm afraid I must disagree: I would prefer to never, ever lay eyes on that miserable little man again. Thereâs a finality, there, shot through with relief. Weâre almost at the top. Fantastic work, Parker.
âHelps having a good travel companion.â He stumbled out into weird, new sunlight, onto unfamiliar ground. The air tasted strange; it was all different, so different, but he couldnât see so good right now. âThis what country airâs like?â he said, and then he collapsed.
PARKER! It was a desperate cry as he hit the dirt. Parker, no! I didnât realize it was so bad. Oh, gods, Iâve killed us both. Iâm so sorry, Parker. Iâm so, so sorry.
Parker couldnât answer. The daylight was bright, too bright, twisting at the edges.
Yellow let out a gut-wrenching sob. You fucking did it, Parker. You brought me home. You kept your promise. I will be eternally grateful to you for that. But I wasnâtâŠ
There was that silence again. Heavy. Looming.
But I made you a promise in turn, didnât I? And⊠And if youâre not going down without a fight, neither am I. If this doesnât work, so be it. But at least I can face you in the Dark World knowing I tried. There was a dark sound, a snarl, a sharp intake of breath. I will not go gentle into that good night. And neither will you. I am the King in Fucking Yellow, and this is my will!
Parkerâs mouth moved, tongue licking his lips, and with a voice that was both his own and something completely alien, a single word like the sound of an avalanche boomed from his lips as Parker fully passed out.
(chapter three)
#malevolent podcast#malevolent au#malevolent fic#parker yang#peter parker yang#yellow malevolent#wallace larson#surrogate series
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The Knight & His Guards: Christmas Headcanons
aka "A Traditional Blood-Soaked Holiday Feast with Dad Knight and His Murder Sons"
A/N: My friend gave me the idea for this and I couldnât help myself. Enjoy!
The Knight (Tarhos KovĂĄcs)
Stoic, patient, the embodiment of honor. So traditional. So painfully dad. You can bet your ass heâs on his best behavior around the holidaysâ trying to keep his temper under wraps and being more patient with his guards than usual.
Makes the most insanely good Christmas dinner like itâs a medieval feast. Thereâs roasted turkey, potatoes, and fresh bread he absolutely insists on kneading by hand with Jailer or Carnifex.
100% makes his guards wash their hands before dinner and gives Assassin the most stubborn glare when he tries to sneak past with bloody gauntlets and mud-crusted nails.
He doesn't talk about it, but if you catch him alone, you might hear a low baritone tune echoing through the fog.
Secretly moved if you give him something handmade. Heâd never say it, but he cherishes that initial-embroidered scarf more than almost anything- second only to his claymore.
Uses the medium grit Alaskan clay soap you gave him with deep reverence. No one else is allowed to touch it. He loves the grain itâs made with because it does the best job of getting any blood or mud off of his skin at the end of a long day.
Has a sharp sword but even sharper dad vibes.
Carnifex (Sander Rault)
Surprisingly soft for a guy who rips people in half with a cleaver.
Tries to act like cookies are âtoo cuteâ for him but will demolish a tray of shortbread if left alone.
Loves practical gifts. Give him tools? Heâll fix your entire base.
Lowkey shreds on the piano. Like, what do you mean Sander can play âCarol of the Bellsâ from memory??
Will wear a Santa hat once and only because you asked him to.
Assassin (Durkos Malecek)
Chaos incarnate. Would definitely stab the turkey for fun.
Refuses to wash his hands and makes a scene about it every. single. time.
LOVES gag gifts. Gift him a rubber chicken and he will laugh for 20 minutes. Give him a real bow and arrow? Heâs outside shooting ornaments off trees within seconds.
Somehow always starts a snowball fight, whether or not thereâs snow.
Loudest Christmas carol singer in the Realm. Screams âJINGLE BELLSâ at 3AM in the Trial Grounds. Knight pretends heâs annoyed but secretly finds it endearing.
Tries to wrap presents with literal daggers and ends up taping them with duct tape and frustration. Insists on his vision of how amazing it'll look once he gets this duct tape off of his hands.
Jailer (Alejandro Santiago)
Silent but observant. Probably stands in the corner like an overgrown Christmas tree until someone hands him a present.
Surprisingly thoughtful. Brings back wild game or herbs he âfound on patrol.â
Would love homemade beef jerky or some comfy-but-sturdy boots. The man is practical to the bone.
Gets a little flustered when complimented. Might blink slowly like a confused cat but appreciates it deeply.
Actually great at gift-wrapping. His presents look like they came from a high-end department store.
Group
Picture them all in Tarhosâ lair, a massive oak table set with food, candles, and a wreath made of bones and mistletoe.
Durkos singing terribly. Sander pretending not to hum along. Alejandro nodding silently to the beat. Tarhos carving the roast beast with a Hungarian pocket saw he restored.
They may be killers, but they have honor and tradition like all good knights.
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Teen-Z: Forever Young #1-I Donât Wanna Be Your Ex (Part 8)
Scene changes into Creepy and Mermaid getting to the closed for the night spa. Mermaid lights up the hairdressing room as Creepy stares amazed. Ninelle now wears black top with long sleeves,black skirt,black stockings and black high heels. She also has now choker on her neck. Mermaid meanwhile has on herself orange dress and same colored Dâorsays.
Ninelle: gasps This place looks beautiful at nights!
Mermaid: Well. I canât agree more. She gets her keys from her black apron as she opens the doors to the shelf with hairdressing tools There we are!
Ninelle: confused There we are what?
Mermaid: smiles widely Which hairstyle do you wanna have,dear? Iâm all yours.
Ninelle: shyly You know. I always wanted to try pigtails.
Mermaid: nods This can be settled up dear.
Mermaid gets two rubber bands in her hands,gel and hairbrush. Creepy watches amazed her transformation. Finally Mermaid puts back her tools as she looks amazed at her work. Ninelle then smiles and hugs Mermaid. Seconds later Camillaâs body is wrapped in beige magic glow as she floats in the air. Song ,,Helping Handâ starts as she transforms.
[Female Singer]
A helping hand
Is enough to make someoneâs day better
Look around.
Thereâs still so much more to you
Spread these wings and fly!
Youâre still young and bold!
Weâre sparkling in the midnight
Together,forever.
Weâre teenagers after all
Together,forever.
Song ends as Mermaid steps out coughing. She has now on herself pink,teal and stone blue with golden accents top,same colored sarong skirt and black-pink sandals. Now she also has some glitter on her face.
Mermaid: looks in the mirror as she gasps in shock Oh my gosh! This isnât happening.
Ninelle: scared Are we a victim of something weird?
Mermaid: starts to panic I hope not! She tries to wash the glitter from her face but the glitter stays No! She then notices beige necklace sparkling on her neck I could swear I didnât had it here few minutes ago.
Ninelle: sighs Look. Maybe itâs result of failed experiment? We had alchemy yesterday. Or maybe something happened when we were making that slime?
Mermaid: Impossible,darling! I checked the ingredients thrice! None of them would have this effect.
Meanwhile to the spa comes white pegasus woman with red,bob cut hair. She has now on herself camouflage colored vest,shirt,pants and kitten heels. On her hair can be visible same colored as her outfit bow.
Dia Paradise: shocked Camilla?! What are you doing at this hour?! Â She looks at her watch Itâs... almost 9 PM!
Mermaid: looks shocked at her boss  Dia?! Oh my gosh,I didnât knew you will come here! I'm sorry!
Dia: giggles raising her eyebrow up Youâve been doing makeovers?
Mermaid: laughs nervously You can say it!
Dia: looks calmly at Mermaidâs beige necklace I love this necklace. It suits you. I got nothing against you giving your friends a favor.
Mermaid: shocked You donât?!
Dia: shrugs Nah. Makeovers are like stories to be told. The more peoples can understand the story you speak to them. The better.
Mermaid: If you love telling stories more. Then why did you opened the spa?
Dia: smiles gently Because during massages I can tell my clients amazing stories my mother used to tell me when I was little. Once they are okay with me telling them stories. I am telling them. It helps peoples to relax.
Ninelle: look amazed You need to teach me this!
Dia: looks gently at Creepy Maybe someday,kid. She then turns to Mermaid Once youâll be done with your makeovers. Please clean up and close the building for a night. We donât want burglary,trust me.
Mermaid: salutes Sure thing,boss!
As her boss leaves Mermaid is scared.
Mermaid: Call Pinky. Tell her that before we will start shooting tomorrow ,we will have serious talk.
Scene changes into Pinky and Luvboy sitting near computer. Luvboy opens his animation program. Then he imports Pinkyâs puppet rig from his folder.
Pinky: You already made puppet rig of me?!
Alvin: I told you. None of you wanted to be in my video because you were busy. And I decided to instead do animation.
Pinky: shyly Can I try?
Alvin: moves his butt Sure. Just donât ruin anything.
Pinky notices many dots on her puppet rig. She moves a bit her modelâs leg. Luvboy khms.
Alvin: Itâs better to invest in timelines. Just so your model can move well. He clicks with his right side of mouse ,,add timeline" Now you can move your other part.
Pinky moves her modelâs head. As she understands now,she moves her hands,legs and once again head. Finally Luvboy sees result. He gives Pinky thumbs up.
Alvin: Not bad for the first time.
Seconds later he feels purple glow assaulting him. He gasps in shock.
Alvin: scared Pinky,whatâs happening?!
Pinky: scared trying to move the glow from her ex Hang on! I will fix it!
As she tries to,the light consumes Luvboy as his transformation starts. Song ,,Helping Handâ resumes.
[Female Singer]
You feel the light?
Donât need to worry now
Missionâs complete
Now enjoy the results
Look around.
Thereâs still so much more to you
Spread these wings and fly!
Youâre still young and bold!
Weâre sparkling in the midnight
Together,forever.
Weâre teenagers after all
Together,forever.
Song ends as Luvboy steps out coughing. He has black t-shirt with pink bunny on it,black and pink vest,same colored pants and same colored sneakers. On his neck he has purple necklace and on his face he has glitter.
Alvin: That was strange... he looks at his new outfit scared Pinky?! Whatâs going on?!
Pinky: Hate to tell you this but this outfit isnât the only new thing in you. She gives him mirror
He notices he has necklace and glitter on his face and hair. He goes to the bathroom to wash it. Seconds later Pinky hears groan.
Alvin: leaving bathroom It canât be washed! He sits on the bed sadly At least I taught you something today.
Pinky: unamused At least I gotten rid off something heavy from myself today. You think Charlie will cry to have me back?
Alvin: giggles Knowing him? Definitely.
Pinky: smiles Donât worry too much about this small glow-up. I kinda like you this way better.
Alvin: gently teasingly Even with glitter on my face and hair?
Pinky: laughing Yes. Then her face turns serious But we need to talk about it with Wiccy before we will start shooting music video.
Alvin: How do you know it wonât wear off untill tomorrow?
Pinky takes a pic of Luvboy.
Pinky: Even if it will. I have a proof now. Definitely Nerd will be up for some testing. Sheâs always up for that.
Scene changes into already morning. Mermaidâs asleep on her spa couch. Dia comes to the building smiling. She creeps on Mermaid as she whispers to her ear.
Dia: Camilla. Wake up.
Mermaid wakes up screaming. She looks at herself. She again wears her outfit when she arrived here and glitter is gone from her hair and face.
Mermaid: shocked noticing necklace is also gone Itâs...gone?
Dia: Yeah. I am surprised you gotten rid of that gorgeous outfit. It suited you. You were in the middle of dress up and I disturbed you yesterday?
Mermaid: confused No. Actually something magical happened to me.
Dia: sits amazed next to Mermaid Oh,tell me with details!
Mermaid: I helped Ninelle and suddenly some weird force transformed me! Weird.
Dia: presses her thumb against her chin Indeed,weird. You didnât thought about speaking about it with expert?
Mermaid: blinks confused I thought you have knowledge about all magical shenanigans.
Dia: she raises up from couch Nah. I only know magical stories my mother used to tell me when I was little. She goes to get her spa uniform Mermaid? You donât have school today?
Mermaid: No. We have week off. Demiloon is sick and Brav is out with his class for few days.
Dia: Donât you have other teachers?
Mermaid: Maybe there is,but Brav and Demiloon are our main.
Dia: blinks confused Okay.
Mermaid: I promised Pinky to arrive on the set in an hour. She said something weird happened with Alvin yesterday. She gasps Maybe same thing like with me?!
Dia: giggles Relax. Take it easy. Maybe your friend will know the answer then what happened?
Mermaid: gasps again Darling,I hope so! She then looks for the Ninelle at the spa but she didnât found her You seen anywhere Ninelle?
Dia: she points at the doors I seen her leaving when I arrived.
Mermaid nods as she leaves the spa building running to the movieset.
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Satan: brass knuckles or boxing gloves to punch the shit outta people
Sitri: A tea set
Leraye: a Teddy Bear
Paimon: a key chain (like when Solomon gifted him a key chain!)
Zagan: Work out stuff? Idkđ
Astroth: i have no idea a book,Maybe, idkđ I know that Astroth is little to zero...
Amy: a jacket like Satan because "We both love Satan!"
Juno: Furerere's he got from Minhyeok!
Mammon: anything MC wanted, I'd say expensive linguistic but technically Mammon already came them thatđ Mammon is just a sugar daddy lolol
Bimit: He'd take MC outt shopping using Mammon's credit card nglđ hmm, something personal, though? Shoot He'd give himself to MC nglđ I can't see Bimit giving people gifts
Eligos: definitely some cute lingerie with lots og pink bows!
Valefor: I don't know for him ngl, but it would be something usefully, like something they could use to protect themselves or for everyday use.
Leviathan: it will be purple because he has to let MC know their his. He gave him a purple color and a purple bathing suit so everyone knew MC was "his." So it would definitely be something like that. Maybe a purple handmade designer chocker necklace? He also gifted MC a jewel at one point so its definitely something bougie.
Foras: ngl, I feel like he would give MC something seemingly normal but it have a hidden camera inside-
Barbatos: I can definitely see him giving MC roses that he grew, maybe something related.to sun bathing.
Glasyalabolas: I don't know what he would give MC, but it would be something horrific that they would stare at I'm disgust. He'd do it not.becaise he thinks it would be a good gift but just to fuck with MC on their birthday đ
Orias: I'm getting skin care products but also he would give MC something Nostalgic that reminds people of childhood. Like older kids toys or plushies something that would make you say "oh I haven't seen one of these in a long time!"
Asmodeus: he's giving MC dildos, but not regular dildios, one of those monster fantasy dildos, MC is getting whips, butt plugs, anul hooks, chains, ropes, restrains, ball gags, anything for self pleasing.
Phenix: giving MC one of those bottled necklaces filled with his cum but it's over flowing.
Dantalian: seems like the time to get MC a cute outfit that or a black latex outfit that makes MC look like a dom is gonna step on some cocks.
Ronove: a chainsaw, I can just feel it...
Belphegor: he gets MC hentai manga, not only that but he'd problem give them those cat ears and those "kawaii" lingerie. Some shit belle delphine would wear.
Beleth: Nicotine? I don't knowđ maybe an expensive flask?
Gusion: An abacus
Andrealphus: I was gonna say an angels wings but I feel like he wouldn't do that because he wears angel wings to draw in angels and he wouldn't want angels near MC . so idk, something very sweet though.
Bathin: would give you something from his travels or maybe something from Nefheim because MC doesn't go there often! OoO
Agares: I was gonna say an orange to be funny but he'd prob give MC something to remind them of him, or something to cause distraction since he like villans and criminals.
Vassago: deadass do not know, I love Vassago but all he does is ride Agares meat and loves Harumonđ cat themed gift?
Lucifer: a medical kit to makesure MC is healthy
Gamigin: I don't knowwwww my brain is farting rn...I was gonna say a rubber ducky but like wtf kinda answer is thatđ I'm so sorry pookie I'm trying to helpđ
Marbas: Bondage stuff...?
Morax:...I'm so lost...đ
Buer: people an expensive fur coat
I was thinking so hard, I have two brain cells and I had to go find the 3rd one because it was missing and activate to think of a this. I'm sorry if it's shitty pookieđđđ
Any of my whb moots help a gal out, what kinda gifts y'all think the demons would get MC for their birthday (aside from what the kings got them for the anniversary)
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