#to overcome what they never thought they could

[vandnana]

In Love With The Enemy [IV]

Chapter 4: Toruk Makto Will Disappear

pairing: lo’ak x female turned na’vi reader

summary: during the time when jake became toruk makto, you were quaritch’s youngest and most valued soldier, the daughter he never had. but, pandora changed you and you died during the final battle, betraying quaritch and wishing that you had been able to do more. now, you have been reborn again, as a na’vi, tasked with quaritch’s new military avatar crew to kill Jake Sully. taking advantage of this second chance at life, you help the Sullys and fall in love along the way.

genre: fluff, angst ~ slow burn, pining on lo’ak’s part.

warnings: mentions of blood, war, violence

highlights: [jake and reader having moments as best friends, mo'at throwing down wisdom, classic sully sibling bickering, more of reader's backstory with quaritch, lo'ak and reader moments!]

word count: 13,394

note: i'm back from the dead like our dear reader with a long awaited update! i am so sorry to my lovers clan for taking so long. for everybody who has waited so patiently, thank you. and for all who are new, welcome!

| prologue | chapter 1 | chapter 2 | chapter 3 |

When Spider awoke, he was immediately blinded by fluorescent lights that hung above him, his head aching as he sat up. The steel of the platform he was lying on made his body feel cold, and as he looked around the room, windowless and white, his heart felt cold too, the lack of life around him so bewildering and unfamiliar. Shifting, he winced, and looking down he found a wound on his right arm—a gash that he had earned while falling onto the forest ground, bandaged with a white wrapping.

Then, he instantly thought of you, overcome with worry as he wondered if you were alright.

Everything had happened so fast.

One moment, you had finally made up with him and you had solidified that bond while flying to the Tree of Souls—that sense of togetherness irreplaceable in his heart.

But before he even had time to truly cherish that moment, the unthinkable happened. Stuck, captured, and alone, Spider's anger and frustration overwhelmed him, his breathing rapid suddenly as he took his emotions out on the walls that kept him. Banging on the double glass, he yelled out with fury, knowing that his captors were watching on the other side.

He struck the glass and the walls until his hands hurt and his knuckles bled, the pain of the impact from the metal clouded by that rage. In truth, he was so exhausted, but he kept on going, the fire inside fueling him as he goaded the soldiers to face him.

Then, suddenly the doors of the room opened, revealing the group of soldiers that had captured him, “Looks like Jungle boy’s awake.” Zdinarsk said with a half-grin.

Spider hissed, bearing his teeth, but that only caused a roll of laughter from each of the soldiers.

“So, you think you’re one of them.” There was a pause as the soldiers stepped aside to reveal who the voice belonged to.

It was Quaritch, his demeanor distant and demanding as he inspected Spider, frowning as he looked at him, intensely displeased, “What’s your name boy?”

Spider didn’t answer, glaring at him bitterly, the defiance making Quaritch’s blood boil. He took one of his guns out, laughing slightly as he unlocked the safety, “I’m only gonna ask you nicely one more time, but after that it’s gonna hurt.”

Spider hesitated before caving in. He gritted his teeth as he responded, meeting Quaritch's eyes with vileness, “Who are you? Tell me that and maybe I’ll answer.”

“Colonel Quaritch.” He let his eyes go to the gun, before eyeing Spider again, “Now again, boy, what’s your name?”

Spider's eyes only widened for a moment before he could feel his rage summit within him, scorn undercutting that growing anger as he scoffed, “Don’t you recognize your own son?”

It wasn't until this moment that Spider realized how much he longed to face his father, to finally look the man who didn't want him in the eye.

The rest of the soldiers teetered, all of them sharing shock as they looked at him. The last time they had seen him, he was only a baby, and here he was in front of all them— grown-up.

Quaritch put the gun down, stepping backward for a moment as he felt a sudden throb afflict his heart, “Miles?” He paused, kneeling down, the twinge in his heart making itself known as he spoke again, this time softer, quieter, “Thought they would have sent you back to earth.”

“So, that's what you named me huh? My name is Spider, and they can’t put babies in cryo, dipshit.” Spider spat, crossing his arms as he kept a snarl on his face.

Quaritch was stunned.

What did he feel for this kid? Guilt? Love? Sadness? Relief? For the briefest moment, he let his resolve down, the realization of who Spider was unexpectedly softening his expression, whispers of those emotions attempting to breach the surface.

To the rest of the regiment it was unperceived, the mask of his steely glare lending his usual gruff. But, Spider saw it clearly. In that blink of time, the awareness of his father's startling vulnerability gripped him, anchoring itself into his mind and forcing its weight onto his heart.

This was the moment that Spider had waited for. He had expected to be angry and stay angry, to affix betrayal, heartache, and pain to the man in front of him who was supposed to be his family. And yet, he felt a tenderness grow within him, an unforeseen ache that he couldn't define or perhaps, didn't want to define.

Like his father, he maintained his reserve of anger as he spit again at them, pushing down whatever was brewing in him and remembering why he was with them and what was at stake for the Sullys.

Turning to Zdinarsk, Quaritch ordered coldly, “Take him to Ardmore and the science pukes. We’ll see what he knows.” Aggressively, Zdinarsk grabbed Spider by the back of the neck, the rest of the soldiers escorting him out into the hallway with Quaritch behind them.

Quaritch was barely dealing with his loss of you, and now, he had his other child with him. He didn’t know what to think, only that his memories allowed him a fraction of affection compared to what he had for you.

Leading him into one of the main console rooms, they were met by General Ardmore, her hands behind her back as she looked at Spider up and down. The soldiers snickered as Spider fought against their strong grips, amused by his pointless attempt at escape.

"Well, what are you waiting for?" She motioned toward the large contraption in the middle of the room, a device unlike anything Spider had ever seen before, "Strap him in."

Zdinarsk pushed Spider onto the vertical piece of white metal of the contraption, securing him with the accompanying restraints. Over his face, Wainfleet fastened a clear plastic mask and tightening it, Spider could feel the pressure focus itself on every part of his skull.

He saw Ardmore ahead of him through what appeared to be a green membrane within the device's overall metal structure, "Now we can do this the easy way or the hard way."

She paused to lean forward, her glare intense, "Where is Jake Sully hiding?"

"I. Don't. Know." The disdain in Spider's voice was evident as he dragged out every syllable.

Sighing, Ardmore stepped backward, pressing a large red button beside her, "I thought you might say that."

A loud whirring sound erupted from the device, triggering it on as the green membrane slowly started to spin. Immediately, the pressure he had felt before became a burning sensation. Like a singe to every synapse, Spider's brain was on fire, the intensity of it building and building.

"Feel that? That's the radiation reading your brain or rather frying it. Good for us, not so good for you. So, I'll ask you again, where is Jake Sully?" Ardmore yelled out.

Spider could barely see her now, the motion of the radiation screen dizzying him, "I told you I don't know! You're gonna have to kill me!"

Quaritch and the other soldiers watched from the clear glass room behind Ardmore, their eyes switching between Spider and the holographic projection of his brain. The scientists helping Ardmore were observing his brain activity, but they detected no viable information, shaking their heads when Ardmore turned around for an update.

"You're gonna have to do better than "I don't know," Keeping her composure, her tone was clear, but she was beginning to get frustrated by Spider's stubbornness, "There's no use in hiding the truth. Just form a thought and we'll see it. Now, where is his base? Is it in the Floating Mountains? Where is he?"

Over and over and over again, it was the same question and the same answer, every second of resistance tormenting him.

Quaritch, on the outside, was apathetic and uncaring, his arms crossed as he stood tall amongst his regiment. But, something inside of him snapped when Spider’s nose began to bleed and his eyes began to roll backwards. Marching out of the room, he pressed the red button, the spinning of the device halting immediately.

He turned over to Ardmore, his own request surprising him, “General, Let me try the old-fashioned approach.”

Zdinarsk and Wainfleet took Spider back to his steel cell, and it was clear that he had been weakened, his usual aggressions no longer a problem for them as they easily grabbed hold of him.

Ardmore raised an eyebrow, clearly displeased as she reluctantly nodded, “He’s not your child.”

She was right. He wasn’t Quaritch’s child. He never was.

You were.

But because of Lyle's lie, Quaritch only knew you to be dead.

He sighed, exhaling as he ached over missing you so badly. Even he couldn't believe his own actions, rationalizing that it was the Na'vi part of him that arose a subconscious motivation for caring about the son he knew he never wanted. Although he hated to be in the form of his enemy, he only realized how relieved, how grateful, he felt to be by your side again. While he reveled in fulfilling his vengeance, it was you who had made this new resurgence of life worth living. And it hurt more to recognize that it took you being gone from him for that feeling to settle.

Quaritch waited a while before he finally entered the cell, the opening of the doors revealing Spider sitting on the platform he had woken up on, his knees up and his arms resting on them.

Filling the room was an awkward tension, the two staring at one another before Quaritch knelt down, “From what I remember, I know I wasn’t the best father to you."

Spider huffed, crossing his arms and turning his back away from him.

Sitting down, he took his son by the arm, pulling him forward and forcing him to face him in the eye, "Look, I only cared for my daughter. I admit that. And now that she's dead I—“

“Your daughter? Dead?” In his disbelief, Spider's mouth gaped, eyebrows raised and his forehead crinkled.

Quaritch was visibly bothered, the slightest wince showing in the crinkling of his eyes as he answered the question, “I came here to kill Jake Sully," He lowered his eyes, his voice like the sound of a hiss as he sneered, "And now that he's killed her, just like he did when I was human, I really can't let him live."

Gulping, Spider nodded, biting his tongue as he withheld the truth, unsure of what would ensue if he let out that you were alive.

Changing his demeanor, Quaritch let go of Spider's arm, resting his palms on the top of his thighs. Quaritch appealed to his son with a brightened tone, “I’m not gonna ask you to give up Sully. I know you’d never do that. You’re loyal.”

He paused again, gritting his teeth, “But so am I. I’m not letting my little girl die in vain. You and me, we’re nothing to each other, really. So, you don’t have to think of me as your father.”

Quaritch paused, looking out at the door, the glint of worry in his eyes betraying his previous words, “But, just ride along, okay? Otherwise, I’ll have to give you back to Ardmore.”

Spider reluctantly nodded, and seeing that confirmation, Quaritch left. Spider watched his father go, and although Quaritch seemed to maintain his stern appearance, Spider could distinguish the agony he felt inside over losing you.

How could he not?

He laid back down on the platform, rubbing his temples. He suddenly felt conflicted. Finally meeting his father, Spider saw Quaritch for who he was. He was a military man all the way, hard and callous. But, underneath that harsh exterior, he saw so clearly how much he loved you. Guilt washed over him without warning. Spider hated that he felt guilty for keeping you being alive a secret, hated that in the presence of the man that rejected him, he could only be silent.

But, he also felt guilty for the small part of him that was actually glad his father didn’t know the truth. Because without you, even for a momentary time, maybe Quaritch would finally see him as his son.

He had finally looked the man in the eye, and he hated himself for suddenly feeling so torn. Yet, it was an inner feeling he just couldn't control. Spider couldn’t help but care about what his father thought of him suddenly, couldn’t help but want some sort of approval from the man who rejected him.

He scolded himself for thinking so selfishly, so stupidly. Turning to his side and closing his eyes, Spider pushed those thoughts away, reminding himself why he ended up where he was in the first place.

He was uncertain about what he would face with the regiment, but he knew one thing.

The Sullys' safety, your safety—he would do what he could to ensure it.

-

“What happened?” Jake angrily yelled as Lo’ak carried you off his ikran.

Neytiri was beside him, attending to Kiri and Tuk, both of them crying hysterically as Kiri repeated with a trembling voice, “Spider, they took him! They took him!”

Jake could only focus on you though, his mind warping reality as fear and panic came over him. You were practically lifeless, your arms dangling over and your head tilted backward. It was exactly how you looked when he was holding your dying body.

He quickly ran to you, taking your body from Lo'ak's arms.

“Y/n! Y/n!” Jake called to you, his voice almost breaking as he felt your pulse, only slight relief coming to him as you showed just the weakest sign of life.

Turning his attention back on Lo’ak, he repeated his original question, nostrils flaring as he slowly spoke, every syllable enthralled with his simmering anger, “What happened?”

"It was my fault, sir. I-" Neteyam began, stepping forward in front of his brother per usual.

But Jake shook his head at his oldest son, "I wasn't asking whose fault it was," His eyes turned to Lo'ak suddenly, Jake's fatherly instinct already getting ahead of him, "I asked what happened."

The fury in his voice deepened the shame in both the brothers, the two looking at one another before Lo'ak finally spoke up, "She wanted to stay here at the camp, but I insisted on flying. Everything happened at the Tree of Souls. She connected to it and then something happened. She stopped responding and then the soldiers came and then...they took Spider,” Lo'ak kept his eyes on his father, the guilt in his eyes evident in their glint, “I’m sorry sir.”

Jake and Neytiri looked at one another worriedly. Then, taking Kiri and Tuk's hands, she walked away with them, ushering calm words of reassurance to abate their cries.

Knowing the truth, Jake could feel his gut turn as his anger mixed with a feeling of unsettlement. Jake glanced at you for a moment before his eyes went back to Lo’ak, “I'm taking y/n to your grandma. Until she wakes up, I don't want you anywhere near her. Now go attend to the ikran.” His eyes went to Neteyam, “Both of you.”

“But Dad, let me–”

“You’ve done enough.”

Lo'ak stepped backward suddenly as the sting of his father's words lashed at him.

Jake expected retaliation, expected the usual defiance from his youngest son, but instead Lo'ak kept his head down, his shame evident. He lingered for only a second more before walking away in the direction of Mo'at's tent.

"Why can't you just listen, little bro?" Neteyam placed what was meant to be a comforting hand on Lo'ak's shoulder, but Lo'ak only swatted it away.

"How can I wait around until she wakes up? With how she is now, that could be hours," He paused, his eyes widening in slight panic, "Or days!"

"Calm down, bro. Grandma will know how to heal her. For now, the best that you can do for her is follow Dad's orders. Come on, we have to see to the ikran."

"Bro, no. It's my fault that this happened to her. I have to make sure she's okay." Lo'ak defied, already walking backwards toward the tent.

Neteyam couldn't believe what he was hearing. Turning to face his ikran, he teased Lo'ak loudly, "Wow! My baby brother is actually taking responsibility for his actions! That crush of his has made him less of a skxawng than usual."

Lo'ak heard him from a distance, halting then turning on his heels, "You're just asking to get beat up. You know that?"

"It would be entertaining to see you try. As if you would even stand a chance against the mighty warrior that I am," Neteyam crossed his arms, proud of his retort as his lips curled upwards into a broad, smug smile.

"You know what, I'm actually going to wait until after y/n wakes up, so she can watch me pummel you," Lo'ak punched his fist into his other palm with a satisfied smirk, "It'll make my victory over you even sweeter."

Nodding, Neteyam took the opportunity to get under Lo'ak's skin, faking a serious tone as he stepped away from the ikrans, "That's a good idea actually. I should definitely come with you to check on y/n."

"Woah, woah, woah," Lo'ak blocked Neteyam's path, standing earnestly in front of him with his hand out, "We don't need a third wheel right now, thank you very much."

Lowering his little brother's hand, he cocked his head to the side, amused as he let out a chuckle, "I cannot believe how jealous you get Lo'ak, really it's a marvel to see."

Lo'ak cleared his throat, "Jealous? Of you? The "mighty" warrior? You wish," Setting his gaze on the ikrans behind them, he rationalized his behavior, "And besides, bro you've got your work cut out for you. I admit being responsible is a page I took out of your book today, but you can have the page back, alright? If you come too, who's gonna do what Dad told us to do?"

"Of course, of course, what he told us to do, I will go and do it." Neteyam rolled his eyes, "But what are you going to do when Dad sees you?"

"Have you met me bro?" Lo'ak let a breath out, confidently patting his chest with his right hand, "He won't see me."

Leaving Neteyam without another word, Lo'ak turned and began to stealthily maneuver his way through the camp. While the forefront of his thoughts focused on wondering if you were alright, the back of his mind was playing his brother's words on a loop.

Neteyam was right.

It wasn't like him to act this way. Wherever Lo'ak was so was trouble, and he had grown used to trying to save his own ass with any excuse he could think of.

But this time was different. It wasn't about him. It was about you.

Back at the Tree of Souls, he couldn't let his emotions get the best of him, too focused on getting you to safety. The first shade of horrified panic when you didn't wake up, the fear that ran through him when he was dodging bullets and holding your body, the urgency he was chasing to get you back to base— now, everything he suppressed, he felt all at once. And veiling it all was that persistent effect you've had on him since the day you met. He knew he liked you. He just never realized how much.

-

Jake was holding back his tears as he carried you, whispering, "Everything's going to be fine, y/n."

It was like you were dying in his arms all over again. Your pulse was weak, your skin pale as he laid you down gently in front of Mo'at. She had already sensed the disturbance near the Tree of Souls, her herbs already prepared beside her as she took your face into her hands.

"Will she live, Mo'at?" Jake asked, and as he said those words, it took him back to the day when he first asked you to save her.

"She is merely unconscious. You forget, Toruk Makto, what I told you all those years ago about y/n. The Great Mother still holds her in Her heart. She is not gone from us forever. Her soul has truly been reborn and she has finally connected with the Great Mother."

Jake furrowed his eyebrows, blinking at her as his eyes urged for her to continue.

She placed the herb paste from the palm of your hands to the nape of your neck, then positioned two fingers at your temples, "When y/n was pulled away from the Great Mother, her spirit was still attached, while her body was separated too quickly. She is just now finding her way back."

Jake managed to give her a small smile, her words providing him comfort amidst the turmoil already brewing in his mind.

"I will take care of her here." Mo'at added to her daughter's reassurance, "Now go. I am certain that you have much to discuss with my daughter." She lowered her eyes at Jake, her intuition directing her.

Jake hesitated leaving you, but ultimately heeded Mo'at's request. Lo'ak, from a distance, watched as his father walked away. He hurried over to you, and as if Jake knew he was there, he turned around abruptly, prompting Lo'ak to dive to the ground as he ducked behind a crate of boxes. Squinting and seeing nothing, Jake turned his head forward, making his way to Neytiri.

Letting out a sigh of relief, Lo'ak got up, walking over calmly. When he got there, Mo'at was rubbing your temples, her words to the Great Mother echoing through the tent as she guided your spirit back to your body. He stepped in as quietly as possible, but even with her eyes closed, Mo'at was aware of his presence, lifting her right hand to motion him closer as she continued to speak her prayers to the Great Mother. Lo'ak knelt down beside you, crossing his legs underneath him, his gaze strictly fixated on you.

You could hear Mo'at's voice like a murmur at first, then it felt like a shout from the distance. Feeling as if you were floating in a body of water, you were carried by your own consciousness, your senses all coming back to you slowly.

The void you were in was no longer dark nothingness as her voice called to you, signs of life materializing as flecks of light became visible to you and sensations became known to you again. Light continued to shimmer in front of you and around that light were the spirits of the Great Mother, wispy as they cascaded up and down. Within yourself, you felt tingly and looking down, you watched as your body went from a transparent white to your familiar blue skin.

Outstretching your hands, the Great Mother’s spirits made their way to you, the light behind them becoming bigger and bigger. They surrounded you from head to toe, and beyond was Mo’at’s voice. As you focused on it, it amplified, becoming louder and louder until it felt like she was right beside you, her words clapping at you like thunder as your eyes shot open and your body instantly arose.

Lo'ak leaned forward, his happy relief evident as he called out to you smiling, "Y/n! You're okay, you're ok—." You punched him square in the jaw sending him backwards, your body instinctively in defensive mode, as you awoke, your breathing sporadic as your eyes adjusted to your surroundings.

"Damn!" Lo'ak howled, his hand rubbing at his jaw.

When you realized it was him that you punched, you lifted yourself from your seated position, apologetic as you sat on your knees and taking his face into your hands, you uttered aloud, "I've gotta stop doing this to you."

Lo'ak huffed, letting out a chuckle as he looked up at you, enamor expressed in the way his eyes softened, "I welcome any touch of yours, y/n, even if it does give me a bruise."

"You're ridiculous," You let go of his face, smacking him on the arm before leaning back, your palms resting on the ground.

He rubbed his arm, leaning forward, "Or two."

Behind you, Lo'ak peered over at his grandma, who gave him an encouraging nod, her lips pursed together in a proud grin, "It is comforting to know that even in dire straits, your affections do not wain."

Turning your head, you blinked at her, cheeks flushing. She merely met you with an innocent smile, outstretching her hands to the two of you"Now, come make yourself useful, my grandson. I must change y/n's dressing for her shoulder."

Spinning your body, you sat with your legs crossed in front of her, and from behind Lo'ak knelt down, gently taking off the wrapping.

Wringing out water from the basin beside her, she handed it to Lo'ak, "Wipe the dried blood," Then, getting up from her seated position, she went to her table, gathering another array of herbs to put onto your wound.

"Sorry if this stings," Lo'ak warned before he began to dab the blood.

He was working so delicately, so careful not to hurt you that you put a hand over his, reassuring him, "I'm not a baby, Lo'ak. You don't have to be so gentle."

Guiding his hands, you helped him as you dug into your skin a little harsher, more blood coming off and transferring to the cloth. At your touch, Lo'ak maintained a cool composure on the outside, but he was fighting his nerves on the inside, the flush on your cheeks suddenly matching the flush that began to take its place on his.

"You know, I really am glad you're okay." His eyes went downcast, knowing that what he was about to say next would shatter the bubble of comfort you were easing into, "But, something happened at the Tree of Souls and you're not gonna like it."

Halting your movement, you put your hand down and Lo'ak retreated his own hand, placing the cloth back in the basin, "What happened Lo'ak?"

With a heavy heart, he explained, "Your regiment, they came, guns blazing. I had to get you out of there. I thought you were dying. He let a breath out, "We were flying through the forest as they were chasing us and Spider...he fell off Kiri's ikran and they took him."

Your heart dropped, mouth agape and your eyes instantly sullen, "What?"

"I'm sorry, y/n." It was all Lo'ak could say as you put your head in your hands, your mind spiraling.

This changed everything.

Your breathing became rapid as you wondered what they could be doing to him. It was obvious why they took him. They needed intel and he was the perfect captive. He was close to Jake. He knew his whole operation. He could lead them right to the base. Then you thought of your father, dread filling you as you could only imagine what he would do when he found out that Spider was his son.

Your first instinct was to get up, to fly out of the base, and save your brother, "I need to—"

Mo'at looked over, the disturbance she sensed in your heart, begging her to interject. But, Lo'ak had already gotten up with you, ready to chase after you and catching your hand before you stopped yourself, staring ahead, your eyebrows furrowed.

You felt a jab in your heart as the truth pricked at you. It was futile. You knew all too well that Jake would follow you there, and naturally so would Neytiri and the kids. Saving your brother meant a death sentence for the Sullys, and as painful as that choice was, it just wasn't a risk you were willing to take.

You sat back down and Lo'ak followed your movements, keeping his hand in yours, hoping that you felt comforted by his gesture. When he squeezed your hand, you finally looked down, pulled from your blank stare. You met his eyes, clear concern etched in the way his forehead wrinkled and his lips turned downward into a frown.

Shaking your head, you feigned not being worried, managing a smile, "Don't look at me like that. I'm okay, I promise." You sighed, "Spider's a strong kid. I know he'll be okay."

He tilted his head at you, not believing a word you were saying as he tapped your forehead lightly with two fingers, "Come on y/n, what's going on in that pretty head of yours, hmm?"

As if to comfort you, Grace's voice within your mind drowned out your worries, her consolation from your visit at the Tree of Souls echoing in your mind,

"I know you’ll defeat your father, but while you’re here, the Great Mother wants you to live freely. It’s the only way you’ll be able to fulfill your purpose."

Mo'at, with the array of herbs in a bowl handed them to Lo'ak. Unwillingly, he let go of your hand, taking it and following her instructions as she said, "Rub this into her wound in circular motions."

Kneeling down, she sat on her knees, preparing a fresh new bandage for you. You turned to your side to look at her and she met your eyes. She remained silent, but as she gazed upon you, it spoke volumes, her chasmic sense of wisdom radiating as she interpreted the spiritual halo that made itself known to her.

In the distance, you could hear your name being echoed from outside, your ears twitching at the sound, and following it came a set of footsteps nearing and nearing.

It was Tuk, running as fast as she could once she had spotted your upright figure from where she was walking with Kiri.

"Kiri! She's okay, she's okay! Look!" Her excitement bubbled through the innocence in her voice as she dragged her sister forward.

Pivoting, Lo'ak lifted his hands from your shoulder as you were met by Tuk's embrace, "Aw Tuk."

"Easy there Tuk," Kiri warned, putting a hand on your back, "Y/n's just woken up."

Kiri peered over at Lo'ak, his hand still in the bowl and scoffing, she inspected his work, squinting, "Did you—" She stopped herself, snatching the bowl from his hands.

"Hey! I was kind of in the middle of something here," Lo'ak protested, but she didn't seem to care as she retorted sarcastically "Right, and you were doing such a great job, skxawng—Move," She pushed her brother out of the way, "You should have used yanna bark sap at this stage of healing."

Mo'at raised an eyebrow at her granddaughter, impressed but slightly offended, "Oh really? And who is Tsahik?"

"You are, grandmother. But, yanna bark is better. It stings less."

Tuk sat in your lap as Kiri took over, and peering over at Lo'ak, his arms crossed, a scowl on his face, you spoke, unable to contain your laughter as memories with Grace and Jake resurfaced, "You know, the two of you remind me of your parents sometimes."

Kiri's eyes brightened hearing her mother's name, "Really? I thought that they were always friends."

Lo'ak, curious as well, perked up too, eager to learn about his father's life before the life he had now. And even Tuk listened, her eyes on you.

You nodded, "Not at first. Your dad and I had no problem being friends. We were inseparable since the day we met. But, your mom needed a little more convincing." You paused, the memory so vivid in your mind that you saw it right in front of you, "I remember how they finally became friends."

You recounted the story as if it had happened yesterday.

You were at Site 26, eating at the table of the small kitchen, Grace beside you, her usual cigarette in her mouth.

He had wheeled himself in there, a plate already ready for him as Grace urged him to sit down, "Bon appetit, Marine."

"If you're feeling extra hungry, I'm more than willing to share," You joked, picking up your fork and pretending to feed him, "Say ahh!"

He swatted your hand away with a scowl, recoiling at the smell, "You know, today I made a kill and we ate it. At least, I know where that meal came from."

He attempted to wheel himself away, but Grace protested, "Oh no you don't. As your boss, I'm telling you to take some down time. That was your other body. You need to take care of this body."

Groaning, he nodded and you took it upon yourself to put it in the microwave for him, "Don't worry about getting up, old man. I got this for you."

He sneered at you, scoffing, "You're lucky that you're younger than me, kids meal. It's not in me to fight a baby like you."

You slammed the microwave door shut, "Ha. ha. Are you sure you can even fight at all? Your aim is shot. I went to the bathroom after you and there was piss all over the seat. I think you should get your cataracts checked."

Grace let out a boisterous laugh, taking a drag out of her cigarette, "I'll kick both of your asses if you don't reel it in. Y/n, baby girl, give the man his food please. He looks like crap."

Taking it out of the microwave, you set it in front of him, taking a seat beside him as you pointed, "It's already in pieces so you won't have a hard time taking your dentures out later."

"Thanks y/n. You're so thoughtful." Jake replied sarcastically, spooning some of it in his mouth.

As he chewed, the taste unbearable, he looked around for a distraction, his eyes fixating on the pictures in front of him. Filing through them, he held one up recognizing the setting, his tone serious as he turned to Grace.

One of his first excursions with his avatar was to visit Grace's old school. Ten years of her life she put into teaching the Na'vi about Earth, just for it to become a cursed piece of history. He couldn't forget the bullet holes that adorned the walls, his curiosity getting the best of him as he held the picture up to Grace, "What did happen at the school, Grace?"

Your expression darkened, sadness overwhelming your heart as Grace took her cigarette out of her mouth, her voice cracking as she explained, "Sylwanin, Neytiri's older sister stopped coming to the school. She was angry about the bulldozers. When her and a couple warriors set one on fire, they came to the school, the RDA right on their trail. She thought that I could protect them, then they killed her right in front of Neytiri. Then, after, they never came back. I got most of the kids out, but that kind of pain," She sniffled, fighting back tears, "It reaches back through the link."

Jake could only listen, understanding dawning on him. She sighed, reclaiming a stern, distant stance as she shook her head, getting up. "Not that you would understand that feeling, right Marine? You're used to doing the killing."

Jake put his head down, shame befalling him and wanting to relieve the tension you called out to her, "Wait, Grace!"

"Don't." Jake said to you, his hand still holding the picture, scorn touching his heart, "You know better than anyone that she isn't wrong. We follow orders. It's what we do."

You tilted your head at him, taking the picture out of his hand, "Then prove her wrong, Jake. Convince Eytukan to let her back into the village. Those kids meant everything to her. And I'm sure they miss her too."

Jake mulled over your words, pursing his lips, "You know, that's not a bad idea actually," He roughed up your hair, "Thanks kid. I'll make it happen. I promise."

Within a week, Grace was back in the village, to her delighted surprise.

You waited for her to come back, leaning against the window near her pod. When she finally got out, she was smiling from ear to ear.

Lowering her eyes, she questioned you, "What?"

You nudged her with your elbow. "Not bad for a Marine, huh?"

She shook her head, in disbelief, "I should have known you put him up to this. This had you," She put a hand up in front of you, tracing your outline as she continued, "Written all over it."

"But he did it, didn't he?" You argued, and she fell silent, rolling her eyes at you.

"Look, Jake's always going to be that Marine at heart, but give him a chance. You gave me one." You coaxed her, taking her hand into yours.

"Alright, alright Miss Marine," She sighed again, but you could tell she was happy, "Jake Sully and I as friends, who would have thought."

Hearing her oldest daughter's name, Mo'at could feel a twinge in her heart, but she was gratified to know that you remembered her. Kiri looked upon you with gratefulness as well, the story connecting her more with a past that she had always craved to know. Lo'ak, on the other hand, felt shocked, the Jake you knew so contrasting to the strict father he had grown up with.

"I spoke to her, your mother," You looked at Kiri, "At the Tree of Souls."

Kiri widened her eyes, urging for you to continue as she listened intently. Mo'at shared the same eagerness, and having already taken the time to interpret the will of the Great Mother when the thought first arose, she knew that Grace's message would reveal the final piece she needed to help you.

"She knows that I'll defeat my father. But, she didn't tell me how, only that the Great Mother wanted me to live freely. Only then, will I be able to fulfill my purpose." Each word was a puzzle perplexing you and you looked at Mo'at, desperate to know what she thought.

Mo'at took a moment to think, her eyes closed as her voice weaved through the subtle breeze that entered through the tent. When she had found the words to say, she spoke them with conviction.

"Life is about balance, y/n. To be too much of one thing and not enough of another can lead us on a lost path. Do not mistake surviving for living."

You took her words in, absorbing what she was saying. You knew what she was trying to tell you and you chuckled appreciatively, but still you continued to question her, curious and concerned, "What does that have to do with my purpose?"

"The Great Mother has spoken her wishes for you. Do not burden yourself with finding your purpose, for it is not meant to burden you at all. There are many things in this new life, many people," She glanced over at Lo'ak for a moment before her eyes set upon you again, "that can still bring you joy even when there is uncertainty."

Lo'ak looked at you instantly, heart on his sleeve as a grin took over his face, hoping that you would meet his eyes, but you only maintained eye contact before averting your eyes, shyness washing over you as you nodded timidly.

Kiri went back and forth between her brother and you, wholly entertained. Putting a hand on yours, "I'm happy that you were able to connect with my mother again. It is good news for this day."

There was a pain behind her eyes and discerning it, you squeezed her hand, "I'm sorry about Spider."

It meant a lot for you to acknowledge that ache she was so desperately trying to hide as she replied, "Thank you. Now, let's finish wrapping your shoulder."

Mo'at handed her granddaughter the bandage and taking it, Kiri skillfully bound your wound, tying it tightly then patting your shoulder, "There. All done."

"Thank you. To all of you." You acknowledged, and letting Tuk off your lap, you stood up, "Now, I have to go talk your dad."

"I'm coming with you," Lo'ak said immediately, getting up and kissing his grandma on the cheek before following you out.

The two girls were close behind, bidding their grandma farewell with a wave as they trailed behind Lo'ak.

From a distance, you already saw Jake and Neytiri in their tent, and although you were far, you could tell they were arguing.

Turning around, you put a hand on Lo'ak's chest, "Maybe you guys should stay behind."

He looked at Kiri and Tuk behind him and reluctantly, he replied, "Okay."

You squinted your eyes at him, expecting his protests, but he remained calm. "Okay...good."

Turning on your heels, you kept going and it wasn't long before you heard their footsteps behind you again. Whipping your head around, you caught Lo'ak mid-walk and not expecting it, he almost ran into you, his hands going to your waist as he avoided crashing forward.

Dangerously close, he kept his eyes locked on you, your expression clearly frustrated, "I'm being serious, Lo'ak. I'm not going to tell you again."

You ignored how his hands felt on your waist, the feeling stirring butterflies in your stomach. Gently taking his wrists, you peeled his hands off.

In surrender, he put his hands up, backing away, "Fine, fine. We're planted, okay? On my honor."

You smiled at him, "Thank you."

When you got to the entrance, you leaned onto the side of it.

So engrossed in their argument, they didn't notice you, Jake's hands in fists as he let out, "We have to leave the Forest."

Neytiri shook her head, her voice forceful and strained, "You cannot ask this. We cannot leave our People. This is our home!"

You cleared your throat, announcing your presence, Neytiri halitng her words immediately as her eyes went to you.

Jake did the same, his expression once distressed and defeated, now illuminated with relief.

"Y/n!" He ran, hugging you, his voice cracking, "Don't ever scare me like that again."

You patted him on the back, whispering, "You old sap. Sorry for scaring you."

Your head rested on Jake's shoulder and you made eye contat with Neytiri. She couldn't hide her emotions, her hands on her head as she looked at you, her eyes pleading as she began to say, "Tell him, y/n that he cannot do this, that there is a way to defeat your demon father from here."

You fell silent, letting go of Jake, unsure of what to say. You and Jake exchanged looks, the two of you in sync.

A father protects. It's what gives him meaning.

You taught him that.

He was Toruk Makto, the leader of the Omaticaya, their protector, their peacekeeper. But, he was also Jake Sully, a father and a husband. Quaritch made him and his family walking targets among The People who never asked to be part of a feud whose end was supposed to be in the Hallelujah Mountains. Jake knew very well how unbearable it is to live with innocent blood on your hands, and he just couldn't bear for the Omaticaya to become collateral damage.

You both knew what had to be done, and there was only one way he could protect everyone, to do his duty, to make sure that no one he loved would get hurt because of him.

Neytiri, in her desperation, picked up her father's bow from where it was being displayed in the tent, "My father gave me this bow as he lay dying," Her voice cracked as she continued, "And he said protect The People. You're Toruk Makto!"

You hated to be on Jake's side this time, but he was right, "Neytiri, he had your children under his knife and now that he has Spider..."

You stopped yourself for a moment, not wanting to admit your fears as you looked away from them both, "He's going to come with everything he's got and he's not gonna stop."

You turned toward Jake and Neytiri again, taking her hand in yours, your heart heavy, "I know you don't want to leave, but you have to understand. If the People harbor us, they will die."

"This will protect The People." Jake put a hand on your shoulder and a hand on Neytiri's face, cupping it gently," Look, I got nothing. I got no plan. But I can protect this family. That I can do."

Sniffling and a wail of cries erupted from outside of the tent and through an opening, you saw the movement of a blue tail. The sound caused Neytiri's ears to twitch, instantly recognizing her child's cries as she uttered, "Tuk?"

Revealing themselves, the kids slowly, one by one, made their way in, and to your surprise, Neteyam had joined them, being the last to walk through the entrance.

"Do we really have to leave here?" Tuk asked, her face stained with tears as she held onto her sister.

Jake and Neytiri didn't know what to say, caught off guard by their children's sudden appearance. Jake was about to walk over to her, but you beat him to it, kneeling down beside her, "You remember what I told you when that man took you in the Mountains? About your dad?"

She nodded, "That he was one of the Sky People, that only he knows how to stop them."

You smiled at her, "Smart girl," You tried your best to hide the heaviness behind your eyes as you reassured her, "Your dad is just doing what he knows best," You looked up at the other Sully kids, hoping that you were giving them at least a semblance of comfort with your words, "Protecting what he loves."

She seemed to understand, pressing her lips together as she nodded. Letting go of her sister's hands, she ran to Jake and he carried her, rubbing her back. Neytiri motioned for the rest of the kids to come and they did, all of them falling in as they hugged one another.

You kept yourself at a distance, looking at them as they embraced one another, your heart breaking. And again, you were reminded what you were brought back to Pandora for—the dread, the pain, the anguish that your regiment was tasked to do. Your mere existence was already causing ruins to Jake and the people he loved the most.

You walked out of the tent, hoping they wouldn't notice you had gone. But, Jake had seen you go, and in his worry, he put Tuk down, following you.

It didn't matter how many times Jake called your name, you didn't respond, buried in your thoughts as you quickly walked through the base.

Despite how much you wanted to live freely like Grace had told you, no matter how much you felt the pull of life, the weight of death was strong, and until you could lift it, you just couldn't welcome a renewed sense of being.

Because here you were, your identity and your destiny still attached to a mission that served the vengeance of what was meant to be dead. You didn't feel like you could move on from that, not until everything was over, not until you did everything you could to protect Jake and his family.

That was the promise you made to yourself when you first awoke and you would keep it. No matter what it took.

The People, you saw, were living, thriving in their homes. Jake had ensured their livelihoods, ensured their safety, and maintained their peace. It was meant to be a comforting sight, but you were only met with sadness in your heart. The words you once told Jake all those years ago, you never realized how much he lived by it until now.

Somehow, you had made it far enough to where the scientists were staying and seeing you, Norm and Max ran over, appearing in front of you.

You finally stopped, pulled from your thoughts as you greeted them, "Oh, hey guys."

"What's wrong?" Norm asked, although he could already guess why you looked so down.

Jake had already broken the news to them earlier, offering a sympathetic hand when you replied, "Haven't you heard? We're getting out of Dodge. Per usual, my dad's done what he does best."

You sat down near the steps of their lab, resting your palms on the sides of your face as your elbows were propped onto your knees, You let out a soft chuckle, attempting to lighten the mood with a joke, "I've got a lot of overdue samples to look at."

That earned a laugh from the two of them, Max replying, "If you weren't like 9 feet tall, I'd definitely let you take a look."

Norm pulled out his tablet, scrolling through countless video logs until he found the one he was looking for, "Hey, I was looking through these the other day and look what I stumbled upon."

He handed you the tablet, and pressing the play button, you watched.

"Y/n. Geez, I've been chasing you down this whole..." You looked up to find Jake walking over with a troubled expression, his words stopping as his eyes made their way down to the tablet, the sight of himself, you, and Grace silencing him.

"Jake Sully here. This is video log..."

You were behind him, hunched over beside Grace with a syringe in your hand, "Twenty-seven. Video log twenty-seven."

"Hey, is this my video log or yours?" He retorted.

"You're the one who couldn't remember the number." You muttered, smiling to yourself.

"Anyway, video log twenty-seven. Learning to ride an ikran. We call them banshees. It's the test every young hunter has to pass. But to do that you gotta go where the banshees are."

"Oo-rah." You chimed in.

Jake turned around again, clearing his throat, and you groaned, "Sorry."

"Man, taming that thing was a bitch. But, when I finally made the bond and I was in the air...Anyway, I may not be much of a horse guy, but riding an ikran? I was born to do that."

"You lucky bastard." You muttered again, taking your eyes out of the microscope when Grace pinched you.

"Stop interrupting. You're distracting him. You know his brain can't handle too much."

Jake scowled, "You can kiss my lily white as—"

"Hey, I'm just saying, if I had my own avatar...I'd never be on the ground."

Watching that only deepened your sadness, and you handed Norm his tablet back, your wish of having your own ikran a pipe dream now that you were leaving the Forest.

Norm, still unaware of the news, looked over at Jake, nudging him, "Might have taken twenty years but, it's still not too late for y/n to have one!"

Jake deliberated it, recognizing your dejection in the way you avoided his eyes. And although in the wake of his decision, it seemed like an impulsive idea, he conceded, "You're right."

In your shock, you finally looked at Jake, taking your hand away from your jaw as your mouth hung open, "Seriously? I thought for sure you would hate the idea of me even stepping outside of camp."

"Well, you're one of the People, aren't you? And besides, "He got up, motioning for you to do the same. Attempting to lighten the mood, he shrugged, "I really didn't want to have to push you in a stroller when we leave here."

You put a hand on the top of your head, allowing your laughter to permeate through the melancholy that felt like it was taking over your body, "You're gonna end up back in that wheelchair real soon. Just you wait."

Jake retaliated affectionately, "It must be tiring being such a pain in the ass."

You waved goodbye to Norm and Max, Jake waiting for you as you caught up to him, "You must be exhausted then."

Jake pulled you in by the shoulder, guiding you forward, "Come on, kids meal, we have one more stop before I take you to Oo-rah."

You returned to the tent, your arrival prompting the Sullys to look up from their separate activities. They were all seated on the floor beside each other. Neteyam acknowledged you with a nod as he was putting a new string on his bow. Kiri was weaving something together, focusing as she looped tiny beads onto a string. Neytiri was with Tuk, the youngest Sully comfortably seated in her lap as she prepared a midday snack. And Lo’ak was only distracting himself as he sharpened his knife over and over, awaiting your return eagerly.

Neytiri arose from her seated position, looking at her husband expectantly, "Ma Jake, what is going on?"

Jake pinched your ear, earning a scowl from you, "We've got somewhere to go."

They all got up hearing Jake, the siblings tilting their heads as they exchanged looks between one another.

The six of you walked toward the edge of the camp. Lo'ak taking his place beside you. "You really want your own ikran? I thought for sure you preferred riding with me." He flirtatiously joked.

"I never said I didn't." You replied rather quickly, catching onto his flirtations, your swift response causing an instant blush to appear on his cheeks.

"I just was really looking forward to racing you on one. Plus," You paused, "I'd definitely win." You feigned a cough to slightly mask your words, a smile erupting on your face as you watched his reaction turn sour.

"You really think you'd win against me? No chance." Lo'ak scoffed cockily, crossing his arms as he raised an eyebrow at you.

"Even Tuk could beat you, bro." Neteyam interjected, overhearing the conversation, letting out a laugh as his sister stuck her tongue out at Lo'ak.

"You're mistaking me for you, bro. You must have forgotten the last time we raced, I left you in the dust." Lo'ak replied, cavalier and confident.

"You cheated that time, and you know it." Neteyam pointed at him sternly.

Lo'ak leaned into you, whispering in your ear, "Think of the slowest animal to ever exist.. that's how slow Neteyam is compared to me."

His taunts amused you, and although Neteyam didn't think his remarks were funny, you couldn't help but laugh, remembering your old pilot days with Trudy.

Lo'ak's lips curled into a smile, pride bubbling in his stomach for making you laugh. You all stopped when you reached the edge of the camp, craning your neck, your eyes gaped at the myriad of clouds covering the blue sky, slowly setting into sunset. Scattered through the air were the floating rocks of the mountains, vast and many in the distance.

With each call, the Sullys' ikrans came, landing on the rocks and taking hold with their talons, screeching loudly as a greeting.

Lo'ak patted his ikran's head affectionately, connecting his queue to his. Cautiously, you put a hand out, but your guardedness was unnecessary as his ikran felt Lo'ak's fondness of you, moving his head forward to meet your hand.

You were surprised by the gesture, smiling.

"He likes you," Lo'ak remarked.

"He's not the only one," Neteyam fake coughed, aiming to embarrass his brother, a satisfied smirk plastered on his face as he mounted his ikran.

Lo'ak clapped in fake enthusiasm then flipped his brother off with both hands.

Jake, who heard the commotion looked over, ready to scold his youngest son. Seeing the look in Jake's eyes, you put Lo'ak's fingers down, pushing him forward toward his ikran, "Just get on, won't you?"

He obeyed your orders, taking a seat on the saddle then offering a hand to you, "You better hold on tight. You know I like to ride fast." He glared at Neteyam, "Unlike some people we know."

"Stop trying to impress y/n with your lies." Neteyam replied, putting his visor on.

You moved Lo'ak's hand over, lifting yourself up onto his ikran. You were almost fully seated when Jake pulled your arm back down, the abruptness almost making you lose balance as your feet landed on the ground.

"What the hell—" You yelped, blinking up at Jake.

"You ride with me." He still held onto your arm, practically dragging you until you flicked his forehead hard in response.

"Ow!" He let go of you, placing his fingers where you had hit him, "Last time you flew with my son, you came back unconscious. I just don't want to take any chances." Jake explained sternly.

You squinted at him, "No, that vein sticking out of your forehead is telling me there's more to it."

Jake looked up, his fists balled as he sucked in a breath through his teeth, "Y/n—"

You put a hand up though shushing him, your expression determined as you defended Lo'ak, "Last time I flew with your son, he got me back here. Safely. So, cut Lo'ak some slack and have a little more faith."

Jake let a breath out, looking up, clearly contemplating and frustrated by your protests. Neytiri though, was having none of it, clearing her throat and prompting his attention, "Ma Jake." Neytiri lowered her eyes at her husband, "She will ride with Lo'ak. Now, let's go before the sun fully sets."

Groaning, Jake nodded, returning back to his ikran but not before he gave Lo'ak one final warning look, which Lo'ak reluctantly acknowledged with a nod.

Again, you lifted yourself onto his ikran, stabilizing yourself as you sat comfortably in front of him. He was unusually quiet with no flirtatious rally to tell you, causing you to look at him from behind.

He felt shy under your gaze but, he masked it immediately, smirking at you like he usually did, "Ready?"

"More than ever." You said, taking hold of the handles on the saddle.

Following Jake out, one by one, the sound of wings' flapping filled your ears and then you were into the sky, the wind dancing through your hair. You ascended upward, the flight to Oo-rah not too long as Lo'ak sped through the air.

For some reason, you were bothered that Lo'ak had no comment to make after you defended him, the silence between the two of you for the first ride deafening.

You looked back at him, catching his eye briefly before turning around, yelling over the wind, "I didn't have to defend you like that, you know."

Lo'ak didn't speak for a moment, leaning forward as he tried to decipher your expression. You looked at him from the side, your irritation making itself known in the glare you gave him.

When he realized how bothered you were, he felt exhilarated at having stirred some kind of reaction from you, a stark difference from your usual tendency to brush him off.

He finally replied to you, making sure his face was dangerously close to yours, "So, why'd you do it?"

He could have guessed your reasons very easily, feeling he had come to know you well enough. It was intensely you to put Jake in his place the way you did—he had seen you do it before. Not to mention, he thought the world of you, your moral compass irrefutable and your heart kind.

But, he just couldn't help but ask anyway, fishing for a specific answer as he hoped he could get you to admit your feelings.

You didn't say anything, trying to find the words to explain your reasons. It didn't help that you could feel Lo'ak's chest behind your back and his breath on your neck, the proximity making you nervous, like you were being studied under a microscope.

You cleared your throat, avoiding his eyes as you looked onward, "Because we're friends."

Lo'ak leaned backwards then accelerated without warning, dipping underneath one of the floating rocks, the movement forcing your grip on the left handle loose. Immediately, Lo'ak let go of one of the handles, cradling you diligently, his hold on you firm as gravity took over, your head now abruptly resting in the crevice between his neck and shoulder. Instinctively, you placed your hands on his arms, clasping onto him to regain your stability.

He beamed at you coyly, smug as he smoothly said, "Just friends?"

You knew you were bright red, the cold of the wind barely able to cool the heat on your face as you lightly touched your cheeks. You were completely flustered, but that didn't change that you were still irritated with him, "If this is your way of saying thank you, you're doing a shit job."

Oo-rah was just up ahead, Jake already landing on the cave's edge near the clearing of the ikran's lair, everyone else following behind him in a line formation.

"And how would you like me to show my gratitude? I can think of a lot of ways." Lo'ak emphasized, moving his eyebrows up and down suggestively.

You both hopped off his ikran and you turned to Lo'ak who was eager to hear your response.

You shoved his face away from yours, responding sarcastically, "Oh fuck off."

"No, you'd miss me." He placed his hand where yours had been, unable to contain the huge grin he had.

You walked over to Jake, and he threw something at you, "Tie the mouth with this first. You’ll know which one is yours because—“

“I know, I know. It’ll try to kill me.” You interrupted, looking down at what you caught.

It was a piece of twine with a ball of rope at the end of it. You practiced spinning it around before walking the cliff's edge, the hoard of ikrans seemingly greeting you with their cries and screeches.

As you continued to step forward, most of the ikrans avoided your eyes, not caring too much about your presence. Then, above, the loud flapping of wings caught your attention, your eyes following the descent of a teal and pink colored ikran. She hissed at you loudly, meeting your eyes with viciousness, and you met hers back with an equal viciousness of your own. You waited for the opportune moment to strike and when you felt that in your gut, you acted with utmost swiftness. 

You could hear the Sullys cheering for you from behind as you tied her mouth, stunning her momentarily. You quickly hopped on her back, wrapping your arm around her neck, gripping for your life as she thrashed against it. Inching closer and closer to the cliff, your heart was pumping with so much adrenaline as you attempted to grab her queue, and in the midst of that, she threw both of you off the cliff.

You could barely hear everyone yell your name in fear and worry as you fell, spinning as gravity pulled you downward ruthlessly. The air become another adversary, threatening to plummet you to your doom, but you only tightened your grip on her queue while reaching behind for your own, your eyes focusing despite how quickly you were falling. 

When you had reached that precipice, Lo’ak wasted no time following after you, jumping off the cliff as he called his ikran. He readied himself to catch you, but there was no need as he watched you finally make the bond. You straightened yourself on your ikran’s back, catching your breath as you felt her own, completely in tune as you commanded her to fly straight.

The Sullys were not far behind you, taking to the air with impossible quickness the moment you fell off the cliff.

You spun around to meet them, their whoops and cheers uplifting you. You bowed your head, taking the praise, and Jake neared you, worry still etched on his face, but his pride taking over as he grinned at you from ear to ear, "I told you not to scare me like that."

"I definitely beat your record." You flipped your hair with pride, laughing as he scowled.

"Like hell you did." Jake flew slightly forward, purposefully making you dodge his ikran's wings, the movement sending you backward slightly.

You gasped in offense, moving forward to do the same thing to him, but more aggressively as he dove downward to avoid you.

You tilted your head backward, laughing loudly at his stunned reaction. Neytiri joined in on the laughter as well, putting a hand to her mouth, so happy to see the two of you flying together at last. It was a sight she never thought that she would see, and she bubbled with joy seeing her husband so happy to be with you—his best friend.

"Alright, old man," You began, and looking to the sides, you called out, "Neteyam, Lo'ak, you, and me, we're racing. Now, I know you're used to going below twenty miles an hour, but try to keep up okay?"

Scoffing, Jake shrugged, "You must have forgotten, y/n, but I was born to do this."

"Right, right. And that was when again? Before the time of the First Songs?" You feigned a pout at him, fake doe eyes as you retorted sarcastically.

Kiri, who was merely enjoying the scenery, snickered at your joke, recognizing your humor as she praised you, "That was funny!"

"Oh, you guys are sooo losing." Lo'ak yelled out confidently.

"Rules? One lap back to the base and the first one back here wins?" Neteyam suggested.

Exchanging looks with one another, you all nodded, agreeing the terms.

"Kiri count us down!" Lo'ak insisted, and she groaned at the request but ultimately agreed.

The four of you lined up beside one another, you sandwiched between Neteyam, who was on your right, and Lo'ak on your left.

"What are you going to give me when I win?" Lo'ak asked you. indelicate in his tone.

"A kiss on the cheek." You teased, before facing forward.

"Are you being serio—" Lo'ak let out, but the sound of Kiri's loud "Go!" interrupted him.

Hearing her first syllable, you darted off, taking the lead, Neteyam and Jake close beside you, while Lo'ak slightly trailed behind, your response delaying him.

The sun was setting, the sky darkening slightly as warm hues of orange, yellow, and red took over. You dodged the floating rocks skillfully weaving your way through, your body leaning forward as you accelerated further and further.

The sight of the base was ahead, and Neteyam still matching your speed glanced over at you. You took the opportunity to dive under him when he did, your ikran vertical for a moment then flattening out as you sped forward.

You were the first to make it to the edge of the base, swiftly turning around and unexpectedly, everyone else had also caught up with you.

Jake, determined to win, flew above then downward in front of you, blocking your path and forcing you suddenly upside down.

With a new perspective, you caught sight of a shortcut, steering yourself there. Lo'ak, having known about that spot from previous races followed after you, the two of you zigzagging between each other.

The two of you were pulling ahead, with Neteyam and Jake mere inches from you both. Seeing Neytiri and Kiri, with every ounce of strength, you gained momentum with ferocity, advancing toward them. But, Lo'ak was right next to you, and smirking, he matched your speed, inching and inching forward, the last few seconds of the race suspenseful as the two of you shot forward past Neytiri and Kiri.

Reaching past the finish line, you turned around to see Neteyam and Jake crossing it. You saw Jake biting the bottom of his lip in disappointment at his defeat, granting you a satisfied grin.

"Who won? Definitely me, right?" Lo'ak yelled at his sister.

But, she had no clue, looking at her mother, who also was at a loss for words.

"No, no you're being delusional. I passed them first." You disagreed, your eyes looking for confirmation in Kiri's.

"Um, guys. I think it was a tie." Kiri replied, putting her hand at the back of her neck.

"It was y/n!" Tuk cried out from where she was seated with her mother.

"See!" You emphasized, turning to Lo'ak.

"Tuk is eight! She can barely tell the difference between a direhorse and a hexapede!" Lo'ak reasoned.

"Okay, then we're having a rematch. From here to the top of that mountain over there, toward the horizon." You pointed and his eyes followed your finger.

"I'm getting that kiss on the cheek." Lo'ak stated, and without another word, you two were off, any consideration of Jake's disapproval gone with the wind.

Neytiri caught onto Jake's worrying concern, easing it as she urged, "It is their last day in The Forest, Ma Jake. Let them enjoy it. Let y/n enjoy it, hmm? They'll come home soon enough for dinner. Let us go back."

Although he hated the idea of the two of you alone without his protection, the thought almost sending him into oblivion, he listened to Neytiri.

Flying had always been your favorite part about being a Marine, and when you had come to Pandora, you had always wanted to fly as you were now—no constrictions, no orders to obey, no mission to complete.

And after twenty years or so, you finally got to.

Through the endless Hallelujah Mountains, in and out of the entanglement of vines, and past the wispiness of the clouds, you slashed at the currents with elegant speed, surging freely in the flux. Once you came to a stopping point, landing on one of the nearby cliffs, Lo'ak's ikran hit the ground first, signaling his victory.

Yet you were too engrossed by the nature around you to realize that fact as you dismounted your ikran, eyes widened as you took it all in. The grass atop the cliff waved at you as the wind cascaded through it, and you looked out into the seemingly endless landscape, breathing in the freshness of the air and doing your best to commit the moment into your memory.

"Ahem." Lo'ak had his hands behind his back, his gaze expectant as he leaned forward, turning his cheek to you, "I think you owe me something."

“Fine, fine.” You gave in, stepping closer to him.

Leaning forward, you hovered over his cheek, about to press your lips to it, but as you did so, the dots on Lo'ak's skin began to glow, signaling the dawn of the night. Beyond, the darkening of the sky began to awaken the bioluminescene of the forest, the sun disappearing behind you and replacing it was the bright white moon.

You gasped in awed wonder, pulling away as you shifted your attention to the change of your scenery. You never got tired of the way The Forest would illuminate like this, the glow of it so vividly shimmering against the black of nightfall.

And while your eyes were busy, Lo'ak's were too, focusing on your figure as you walked away from him.

"You—"

"Shhh" You put your finger up, "I'm looking at all of this."

He grabbed onto your tail playfully, "And I'm—"

You whipped your body around to face him, defensive as you put your hands out, lunging to grab his tail in retaliation. He caught your hand as you leaped, pulling you forward.

He continued what he was saying, "And I'm looking at you."

Lo'ak paused and you could no longer distinguish the mischievous glint in his eyes as they bore into you, his affection dripping like honey.

Slowly, he continued to pull you forward, gently closing the gap between you. You did nothing to brush him off, too entranced as you took those small steps.

His hand still in yours, he tilted his head slightly, his voice soft, but firm.

"I See You."

You blinked up at him, a fog taking over your brain, your mouth open, but nothing coming out as you stood, stunned.

There was silence between the two of you, everything blurring as your vision fixated on one another. The tranquil of The Forest lent comforting warmth that blanketed the two of you, contrasting the rapid pumping of both of your hearts.

And perhaps it was because you were wrapped up in that moment, so taken by his words that you felt emboldened. Hooking your finger onto his necklace, you pulled him toward you, connecting your lips.

Lo'ak only widened his eyes in surprise for a second before he melted into you, trailing his hand up your arm as he cupped your cheek and the other took its place on your back, the gap between you closing as he deepened the kiss with tender adoration.

You allowed yourself to be in this moment with Lo'ak cherishing the suspension of reality, your mind calm, no ruminating about the purpose the Great Mother has for you, no concern of your father's revenge poisoning your thoughts, no distress found from losing your brother.

Enthralled in that freedom and peace, you felt as if you were in a dream, a good one that you would keep close to your heart.

You ghosted your fingers around his collarbone to grab onto the back of his neck, moving in rhythm with him and meeting him with the same passion before you quickly pulled away, the taste of his lips lingering on yours as you caught your breath.

Lo'ak, still in an enamored daze, lightly grazed your lips with his two fingers, a huge smile on his face, "I'm gonna expect this every time I win."

Your mind catching up with the desires of your heart, you repositioned your hands onto his shoulders, straightening your elbows to put distance between you and him.

"This was a one time thing." You clarified as you mentally scolded yourself for being so impulsive.

Furrowing his eyebrows at you, he met you with a confused expression, slight hurt lacing it, "Why?"

You patted his shoulders, sheepishly smiling, "We're friends."

"For now." Lo'ak said with a quickness.

"Lo'ak." You gave him a stern look, but you were still clearly flustered.

Lo'ak chuckled, "You kissed me!"

You had no rational comeback, spitting out whatever came to your head as you came to your own defense, stuttering, "Well, that was your fault! You were staring at me the way that you always stare at me but then you—"

"Then I what?" Lo'ak was wholly amused. He knew you liked him back, and he beamed with internal satisfaction.

Frustrated, you scratched the back of your neck, "You can't just say what you said, Lo'ak. It means something, it means everything!"

"Well, I meant it." Lo'ak shrugged casually, crossing his arms, "And I'm not taking it back."

You felt childish at this point, hesitating in pure disbelief as you let out a breath.

Uncrossing his arms and reading your expression, Lo'ak aimed to assure you, "If you want it to be a one time thing, then it's a one time thing. We're friends, of course we're friends."

You hardly believed him though, squinting at him as you tried to discern his intentions, expecting a mischievous comment.

And you were right in thinking that, Lo'ak looking up to the sky as he let his voice trail into the wind, "Even though you had nooo problem getting real close to me when we were in the air," He made eye contact with you again, "We're friends."

“We both know you did that on purpose," You warned, putting a finger up at him pointedly, "And also, you fly your ikran like you're drunk.” You scrunched your nose, playfully insulting him.

He brushed a stray hair away from your face, “I never did thank you, you know for defending me.”

You pinched his ear, causing him to wince, “Took you long enough.”

He rubbed his ear to ease the pain, “Look, I’m not the perfect soldier or the perfect son, so I’m not used to it. That’s why I didn’t know what to say at first.” Vulnerability coated his words as his hand went to the back of his neck.

“Well, you're perfect to me.” You had uttered it so nonchalantly, shrugging your shoulders even, as if you had said it countless times before.

You watched his expression soften at your words, his gaze on you already shrouded with affection now decorated in adoration, his heart beating so fast he swore it was going to pop out of his chest.

Whirling around, he put his hands at his temples then extended his arms out, palms outstretched to the sky, the tips of his fingers in your view, "You say these things, and you're just begging to be kissed. I swear."

"Don't make me punch you again." You warned, balling your fists up.

"Stand down there, beautiful. I'm only joking." Lo'ak put a hand up, easing your fists down.

You sighed, "What I'm trying to say is that even though your dad is my best friend, I don't agree with everything he does. And that includes how he treats you."

Lo'ak was about to make another flirtatious joke, but you continued, "And your siblings."

He put his hands at his hips, looking down at the ground, "Had to bring them into it too, huh?" He muttered, "So romantic."

"I knew Jake when he was like you. Stubborn. Troublesome—"

"Fun?" Lo'ak added.

You chuckled, nodding, "I'm surprised he's so strict now."

"Trust me, the way he acts when you're around is more surprising. He hasn't joked like that since Neteyam, Kiri, and I were kids. But that was before the Sky People came back and started building that city."

And suddenly, the worries you had came flooding back, the harsh reality sinking its teeth into the dream that you so desperately wanted to stay in.

Yet, that was the thing about dreams.

Sooner or later, you have to wake up.

The People.

The Forest.

They would become relics to you as you once became a relic to it.

-

Everything was set by the next day, and just as quickly as you had settled into camp, you were leaving once again for a brand new horizon.

The People had gathered onto the ground to attend the ceremony of the new Olo’eyktan, but what was meant to be a joyous celebration was tainted by overwhelming loss and sadness.

Jake knew his successor, Tarsem, was wise beyond his years, that he would make a strong Olo'eyktan.

But as you looked upon Jake's face, his expression strong and stoic, you could still see the pain in his eyes.

The memories you had in your new body didn't remember the Final Battle, the day that you first saw Jake in the air on Toruk. You didn't remember it, but you knew you felt proud. It was who he was always meant to be.

The leader must die, so the leader can be born.

Toruk Makto will disappear.

The People will be safe.

With this new beginning came tearful goodbyes as the Omaticaya bid you all farewell, and you had maintained your strength until you saw Norm and Max. You couldn’t hold your tears in as you gave them both one final hug. 

Mo'at gave her final embraces before your departure, and when she finally got to you, she put her hands on your shoulders, “My child, whatever you may experience beyond this forest, the Great Mother has ordained you as one of The People. Do not forget that.” 

You gave her one last hug, “I won’t. I promise.”

You were at the edge of a cliff, vast, blue, open sea ahead of you, ikrans ready to fly. But you were hardly focused on what was ahead as you looked back at The Forest, etching and ingraining every detail of it in your mind.

Into the air, suddenly the feeling of leaving felt like true resignation, the momentary banter between you and Jake forgotten as you looked out into the open sea, seemingly endless, full of possibilities. But what was meant to be a fresh start was only cloaked with the sweeping melancholy that you and the Sullys felt inside as The Forest, the colossal trees, the lush landscape, and the presence of the aviary creatures amidst the foliage became a green mirage, smaller and smaller as you ventured further out until the sight of it could no longer be seen.

One life ends.

Another begins.

-

Author's Note

to my lovers clan,

i'm so so sorry for taking so long to give you guys an update. life has been insane these past two years and i finally was able to finish up this chapter and move forward with the series.

in truth, my creativity was so shot and i couldn't bring myself to write work that i wasn't proud of. you guys deserve the absolute best!

for everyone who has waited for my series, i really really love you and appreciate you. to know that there are people out there that have taken the time to read my work, it is a blessing.

if you liked the chapter, let me know what you think in the comments! i always love reading your thoughts!

please always take care of yourselves!

love,

nana <3

~~side note here: going to break down some of my choices down for this chapter, so if you’re interested, read on!

i really leaned into the themes of friendship and family in this chapter and i focused on the forest and flashbacks because this will be the last time we'll see them in this setting.

i fell in love with the first movie so long ago, that when i rewatched the extended version recently, i realized that i forgot that neytiri had a sister!

i thought that the flashback i added with her really enriched the storyline and the connection between Grace, Jake, and the reader, while adding more volume to HOW two worlds could collide—how a boss could become a friend.

Spider getting captured right after they connected too was so necessary because I really wanted him to feel so conflicted — he had just connected with his sister, felt a bond with her, and suddenly he realizes that he can't fully hate his father. It mirrors how the reader also feels about Quaritch, but her history with him, her sense of duty and moral compass guide her more toward the Sullys, while Spider struggles with it a little more.

And then these moments with Jake and y/n too! Like, they are BEST friends. But to him, you've always been the baby, so him getting all protective now that he's a dad was a comedic choice that I couldn't resist. Cause it's like... Jake that's your whole ass son and you're cockblocking???? And then of course, Neytiri, even though she doesn't outwardly show it (like her mother Mo'at our grand shipper of the Lo'ak reader ride), she doesn't mind that Lo'ak is clearly interested in you

THENNNN,

we have our stars of the show, the slow burn romance we're all dying for— Lo'ak and reader.

LIKE SHE KISSED HIM? (I mean, shit me too honestly, but damn, who would have thought?)

I was originally gonna have him kiss her first, but it felt so much more of a natural move for her to just do it, the moment so right for her and then the INSTANT regret of it on her end, and Lo'ak teasing her after—it encompasses how easy their relationship is and how willing Lo'ak is to just take things at her pace, even though he's ready to dive right in.

~

also, p.s. i still have my taglists and will update it, but with how the character limit is, i wasn't able to put everybody down on this post.

taglist:

@mae-is-crazy @mrs-sullys-blog @23victoria @neteyamforlife  @a-queen-blr @neteyamslovr @fifty-shades-of-mischeif @pretty-npeach @tonni30  @itsemy01 @jimfiqs

[purplehalnw]

I was thinking about s4e4 of The Boys, you know when Homelander gets revenge on the scientists that tortured and experimented on him when he was a child.

Ever since we first heard about Homelander's childhood back in s1, I had always wondered about the why.

So, what really got me thinking was Barbara's explanation for why no one stood up for Homelander. She claims that they were scared. Now for a second I thought she was saying that they were scared of what Vought would do to them if they disobeyed orders. But no, Barbara says that they were scared of Homelander, telling an anecdote of how Homelander killed his bio mother, three doctors, and a nurse when he was born.

This just raised more questions for me. Because surely, if you're afraid of this child and you're scared that he might harm you, wouldn't it have been better if you treated him nicely? Like Homelander killed all of you in this ep because of how you treated him. Being nice and caring and standing up for him probably would've made it less likely for him to harm you.

Also, many people, including Barbara, say that they were "just following orders". But we know that's not completely true. Not after hearing Homelander's story about Marty. Because what Marty did wasn't "just him doing his job". What Marty did was unnecessary, gross, and cruel. And although Marty is the only example of this that the show presents, I'm personally inclined to believe that he wasn't the only one who treated Homelander this way. So why? Why did they treat him this way?

And that brought me back to the "they were scared" line. And I think I get it now. They treated Homelander the way they did so they could have a sense of power over him, to lessen their fear so they could just get the job done and create the "perfect product". By dehumanizing him, by refusing to see him as the child he was, by distancing themselves from him physically and mentally, they could get by. And then on top of that they conditioned him to be desperate for their love and attention to hopefully insure that he would never harm them. Like Jesus Christ.

Also just a little extra tangent. I'm also fascinated by Barbara's comment on Homelander never escaping. She says "you could've broken out of here anytime you wanted but you didn't". At first, I thought she was straight up victim blaming and that was it. But then she goes on to say that she knows why Homelander didn't leave, because he didn't want to disappoint them which they specifically conditioned him for. The way she says it, her tone of voice, it feels like she's saying "yeah we fucked you up and there's nothing you can do about it" or "yeah we fucked you up but you just weren't strong enough to overcome it so I guess you have no one else to blame but yourself".

This pisses me off so bad because bro even if you hadn't conditioned him, Homelander was a kid with no clue about the outside world and whether he could survive in it. And don't lie to me, even if your asses couldn't have stopped Homelander from escaping I know Vought definitely would've fought hard to get him back. And you probably could've since you had and still have a fuck ton of adult supes on your rosters.

[soeyekonic]

— ✩♬ ₊˚. number one girl ⭑ S.L

˚⟡˖⋆ synopsis haunted by a past relationship, you struggle with insecurities in your new relationship with sophia. with patience and reassurance, sophia helps you overcome your doubts and embrace the love you deserve.

warnings: fluff… i think? (we cheer…i think.). slight angst. self doubt. insecuritis. implications of a toxic relationship

currently playing: number one girl - rosé

you never thought you'd find yourself in this situation. after everything that happened in your past relationship, you swore you'd never let anyone in again. but here you are—holding hands with sophia. it’s still a new relationship, and you're still adjusting. every moment with her feels like a whirlwind, and yet, there’s a constant cloud of doubt hanging over you.

you never felt worthy of this kind of love, especially after what you have been put you through in the past. but sophia… sophia is different. you just can't shake the fear that, maybe, she doesn't feel the same way about you. maybe she’s just going along with it because she feels sorry for you. maybe you're not as special to her as she is to you.

19. 11. 2024

the first time you kissed, it felt like fireworks. it had been a slow build-up, the chemistry undeniable, but you were hesitant. even then, you questioned whether you were worthy of her affection. she was so patient, so gentle with you, and that was the hardest part—letting yourself trust her when the doubts from your past kept you distant.

it happened on a rainy afternoon. you had just spent the day with her and the rest of the girls at a photoshoot. the energy had been light, the day filled with jokes and laughter, but there was something else—something lingering between you two that neither of you could ignore anymore. as you sat together on the couch in the studio, your fingers brushed. it was a subtle touch, but it set something off in your chest. your heart raced, and your mind was a whirlwind of emotions you couldn't control.

“i—" you started, voice shaking. “what’s wrong?” sophia looked over at you. “i’m scared."

her gaze soft but full of concern. “scared of what?”

"scared of messing this up," you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper.

sophia’s smile was soft, her eyes warm with understanding. "you won’t. we’re in this together. i promise."

and that was the first promise she made to you.

19. 10. 2024

it’s a quiet evening, the two of you lounging on the couch, a movie playing softly in the background. you feel her hand graze yours, and your breath catches in your throat. you pull your hand away slightly, unsure if you want to risk feeling too vulnerable.

sophia notices the shift and immediately meets your eyes. “hey, it’s okay. i don’t mind if you’re not ready to be all touchy-feely.” her voice is soft, understanding.

you give her a small smile, but it doesn’t quite reach your eyes. “i just... i don’t want to mess anything up,” you admit, the words slipping out before you can stop them. “i’m still not sure i’m deserving of all of this.”

sophia’s expression softens, and she moves closer to you, her hand gently cupping your face. “you don’t have to be anyone else but yourself with me. i like you, just as you are. i promise you, there’s nothing to worry about.”

her words hang in the air, and for a moment, you feel something inside you shift. but the doubts linger in the back of your mind.

21. 11. 2024

a few weeks have passed since that first night when she promised she wouldn’t leave. you still struggle with those doubts, but every day with sophia feels like a little bit of reassurance. the way she looks at you, the way she speaks to you—it’s not like anyone else.

you’re out for a walk, the cool air of the evening brushing your skin. the sky is dark, the city lights twinkling around you, but you feel a nervous tension between you and sophia. the feelings swirling inside of you are the same: what if i mess this up?

“i don’t want to rush anything,” you tell her softly, voice tinged with uncertainty. “it’s just… i don’t want to get hurt again.”

sophia stops walking and turns to face you, her eyes warm but serious. “i’m not here to hurt you,” she says, stepping closer. “i care about you, and i’m not going anywhere. but i’m not going to force you to be something you’re not ready to be. you’ll know when you’re ready.”

the sincerity in her voice makes you feel both reassured and overwhelmed. you want to believe her so badly, but the memories of your past are hard to shake off.

the days go by in a blur of laughter and quiet moments. you never imagined you could feel so at ease with someone. it’s all new—letting someone love you, letting someone in without the constant fear of being hurt again. but sophia has a way of making everything seem simple. she doesn’t ask for perfection. she only asks for you.

sophia leans across the table at a café, her fingers lightly brushing against yours. you glance up at her, your heart racing. she’s looking at you with such intensity that you almost feel like she can see right through you.

"you know," sophia says, her voice soft but firm, "i know you're scared. i can see it. but i promise you, i'm not going anywhere."

you swallow hard, the weight of her words settling over you. "but what if you find someone better?"

sophia chuckles, a warm sound that makes you feel a little lighter. “i’ve already found someone amazing,” she says, her thumb gently caressing your hand. “and that’s you.”

your heart skips a beat. you freeze for a moment, her words sinking in. she’s not saying this out of pity or obligation. she genuinely feels this way. you can see it in the way she looks at you, in the way she takes care of you without asking for anything in return.

10. 01. 2025

it’s a few months later, and you’re at a katseye event. the noise and excitement fill the air, but you can’t stop thinking about the way sophia looked at you earlier that day. the way she said she loved you—again, as if it was the easiest thing in the world.

you feel your heart beat faster when she spots you backstage and immediately makes her way toward you, her smile bright. she wraps her arms around you, hugging you tightly as if she’s missed you, even though you’ve only been apart for a few hours.

“i missed you,” she whispers against your ear, and something inside you breaks. for the first time in so long, you let yourself fully sink into the feeling. the doubts, the fears, they all melt away when you’re in her arms. you know now, for sure, that she means every word she’s said.

01. 02. 2025

it’s another quiet evening. the two of you are snuggled up on the couch, sophia’s hand gently stroking your hair. the movie is long forgotten, the soft light of the room casting a warm glow on her face. you glance up at her, feeling that familiar flutter in your chest.

“do you ever worry that you might not be enough?” you ask, the vulnerability creeping back in despite yourself.

sophia stops for a moment, her fingers pausing in your hair as she looks down at you, her eyes serious. “never,” she replies softly. “i don’t want to be anything other than me, and i don’t need you to be anything other than you. you’ve already given me more than i could ever ask for.”

your breath catches in your throat. every word feels like a promise, something solid and real. you realize, then, that all the doubts you had, all the fears, have no place here anymore. sophia doesn’t just say ‘love you’ she shows it in everything she does.

25. 03. 2025

a few weeks have passed. and here you are—walking hand-in-hand, with sophia, down the street, the sun bright overhead. you talk about nothing in particular, the wind lightly brushing your skin. and for the first time in your life, you realize something important.

“i’ve never felt this way about anyone before,” you admit quietly, your heart in your throat. "i was so scared to mess it up."

sophia stops walking and turns to face you, her expression so sincere it takes your breath away. "you wouldn’t have messed it up," she says. "because we’re in this together. you’re not alone in this, okay?"

and for the first time in your life, you believe it.

sophia’s smile lights up your world, her eyes sparkling with nothing but love. you squeeze her hand tighter, your heart at peace. you’re ready to let go of all the doubts and fears because you know now that you’ve found something real. something beautiful. something worth fighting for.

and as she leans in to kiss you, you finally feel like you’ve found your home.

“are you happy?” she asks gently, her voice full of tenderness.

you nod, your heart full, your smile genuine. "i am. i didn’t think i could be, but you’ve made me believe it’s possible."

sophia leans in, her forehead resting gently against yours. “you are my number one girl. always.”

and for the first time in your life, you truly believe it.

a/n: 😬 i’ve never written fluff before and that’s acc a crazy statement… BUT this won the votes so it had to be posted…lolz. lmk if i’m capable of being a fluff writer 💀💀

[cultkinkcoven]

Had an interesting conversation with Lord Lucifer last night.

I won’t go too into the details but y’all already know I’ve been having some problems with my mom. Well I ended up cussing her out basically through text lol. I sent her a long letter about everything and made myself extremely clear. I thought it wouldn’t amount to anything, but to my surprise, it actually seems to have gotten through to her. She genuinely apologized for what feels like the first time, and even asked me if I’d consider going to counselling with her, which I agreed to at least try.

I asked Lucifer if he thought I was making the right decision, should I give her another chance? And I was expecting him to say something like “don’t allow yourself to be manipulated again,” but instead he sort of smiled and said he was proud of me.

“It takes a lot of strength to survive after exile, even more to forgive. You have mastered this period of self acceptance, resilience and survival, now I hope to see you master healing.”

and that was nice to hear, it gave me hope that this is something that truly can be overcome with time and effort.

But then, I got this pit in my stomach. Even if my mom and I could somehow find common ground, I am still a Luciferian, I will remain a Luciferian, and she will likely remain a radical christian. And as if he was reading my mind, Lucifer said, “when you have healed you will no longer need me.”

and that stung, because I never wanted to think that my relationship with him hinged on my distance to my mother. I didn’t respond.

“When we met, you had wounds that I sought to help you heal, now you are learning how. I never sought to isolate you, even after the fall, the goal is to rise again, eventually.”

“with you,” I responded, “I rise again, with you, with myself, still the person I was as I fell. Maybe I originally clung to you because I needed something, and you made the wounds less painful. But I also chose you, not to be my healer, to be my God. Your light has shown me a path to redemption, you have helped me heal, but that is not all you have done. You know I will continue to follow you, you know you will always be my Father, whether I am wounded or standing tall.”

and he smiled at that again. “Your mother may have found it within herself to try and find you, my boy. That doesn’t mean she’ll like what she sees at the end of it. Are you really willing to lose her again if things don’t work out, just to continue following me?”

lol. “Lord Lucifer, you taught me how to fall without hurting myself. I will spend my entire life rising and falling, I have spent my entire life leaving and returning to her. So long as I am Shi, and so long as you are Venus, we will forever be tethered to our movements. That’s what I promised you. That’s what you promised me.”

In could feel him confront me, like he was seriously looking down at me. “That’s very difficult, Shi, that’s a very heavy burden to carry. In swearing yourself to me you have guaranteed a life of strife, a constant argument that will never go away, is that what you want?”

“Are you not the constant argument that never goes away? and am I not the child that never knows when to stop talking?”

“Some would say”

“Then this is a strife I am familiar with, it’s an old friend of mine. I don’t fear conflict, what I fear is the erosion of my sense of self, my principles, your principles. Lucifer, I will become the enemy of the world if it means having this.”

and he shrunk down to my level, so we were eye to eye. “and what is this?” he asked.

“Us. you, me, the person I found within myself when I had nothing else. I’m okay with being hated, what I cannot be is misrepresented. I won’t turn into someone else for the sake of someone else, especially not when the Lord I have has always accepted me for who I really am. I just gained this freedom, Lucifer. It is the one thing I can never let go.”

and finally, he smiled again. “Freedom,” he echoed, “yes, that’s it. There are many things I love, education, discovery, temptation… but freedom has always been my truest love. You’ve earned freedom, now you have choice.”

“I choose of my volition to follow the light that loves freedom. Even when I no longer need you, I will always choose you, and I will always choose myself. In doing so I have also chosen love, I have chosen to be strong and give to others what has not been given to me. I will not be cruel or turn away from those who have abandoned me, I am stronger than them. You gave me this strength.”

and he nods. “You can’t get rid of me, bitch,” I added, and he blew up into laughter. “I’m serious. You signed that contract just like I did, you’re stuck with me, Lucifer, forever. You don’t get to be free of me just because my mom is back.”

and another hearty laugh. “It’s a done deal then,” he finally says, “you’re mine forever. I will love you no matter where you are, no matter what you need.”

“I fucking better be.”

As difficult as this whole thing has been, I’m actually… happy? now. I feel like I have actually achieved some peace, not by running away and saying fuck you forever to everyone, but by being real as fuck and doubling down. Had I not sent that message, had I not been the harbinger of conflict yet again, we would still be stuck in limbo. And as satisfying as it would have been to my pride to say “you fucked up, its too late”, I know that in the long run, building and healing will be better for my soul. My internal conflict has evaporated, I know exactly who I am and exactly what I want and need. I have no guilt nor shame, and I have the tools to continue to ascend higher, even if I fall.

I am content.

[hoiststowline]

_bluestreak x reader

"You would tell me if something was wrong, right?"

proposed to ease your nerves, though it only was accepted as a opportunity to deny it even more, kept willingly under lock and key. it was uncomplicated to draw up a facade, if it could even be defined as such. to feel so effortlessly at peace in someones presence was more than enough of a problem solver, if only momentarily. not a permanent solution, but one could pretend as long as they'd have your poor company.

"I'm fine," you insist, as an awkward smile appears, though transparent to see the candor within your expression.

"Yeah, and you just avoided the question." bluestreak counters, indisputably seeing directly through your horrible front.

owlishly blinking, you pause, searching to remember just what he'd asked. "What do you mean?"

"You can say you're good all you want, I'll listen even if I don't agree. But if there really was something upsetting you, you would tell me, wouldn’t you?" he’s being somewhat pushy, aware of his building forwardness, yet there’s something just below the surface to be uprooted here. bluestreak can see it well in your eyes, a shred of glassiness that returns when you fall silent amongst conversation.

every so often, you cast a glance to his mirror, as if to display that you were listening and not avoiding such a parley. it was only adding to his unease, recalling the approach of not meeting someones eyes when not speaking the truth. it didn't happen often, not at all, he can properly recall one time before this and that was over something so trivial that he laughed out loud afterwards.

it's a tactic he's familiar with, it's not just adhered only to organic psychology. cybertronians do it as well, bad liars even more than the average tearaway. bluestreak's no stranger to your mannerisms, but this one remains foreign enough to question, troubled regarding your sham of a show of being 'fine'.

“I…would, yes.” carefully considering your choice of words, molars find the inside of your cheek to lamely bite down.

bluestreak doesn't immediately reply, perhaps thinking you would let go of a little more information than that. silence overcomes the cabin, and for the first time it's uncomfortable, shoulders dropping from your ears after you've realized how tense you had been.

hoping you’ve dodged a bullet, you move to redirect the discussion with half-parted lips, anything else but this on the tip of your tongue.

never quite far from where it consumes you whole, you freeze at his next question.

“You swear?”

now contiguously locking gazes with the mirror, there was no amount of guilt that could sway you to lie, even if you couldn’t presently see his face. while every temptation begged you to let this one die here, to escape such an interrogation, it would be in vain. the end result would be irreparable damage, bending an unspoken promise about honesty and trust that you knew were very important to bluestreak.

as if he read your mind, bluestreak’s dashboard crackles with frustration, immense concern and worry piling within his chassis. “So why are you lying?”

he’s right. bluestreak has been right for the past hour, gently nudging you to try and spill whatever had you trapped like a vise.

your behavior was helping nobody.

“I’m not lying,” you try, to which he returns a grumbled thrum. “Bending the truth a bit, sure.”

“That’s not funny, if it’s supposed to be a joke,” he replies, to which you turn toward the window at the passenger seat, drawing your knees to your chest.

eyes going mildly wide, you then immediately spin back toward the dashboard. “You just passed my street.”

“Oops.” is all he says, more of a deadpan than a jest.

if you thought for one second that he was going to drop you off and let this go, you were sorely mistaken. how could he in good conscience? especially since you’ve just admitted that something was a amiss, why would he give you proper route to dodge the exchange any longer?

swallowing thickly, you dare to ask the question you already know the return to. “Are you going to circle back or...?"

"No," bluestreak answers, moving back toward more local roads. "I'm good, thanks."

you can feel a sensation of melancholy rise to your chest, so proudly even after you'd done the absolute most to keep it at bay. it didn't feel good to unload your problems to the next person when they didn't deserve it, in particular bluestreak.

"Let's try this again,"

you go to object, but he promptly continues. "Sorry, I don't take suggestions for the topic at the present, but you're welcome to complain about it later."

he wasn't trying to be comical, but delivery was more witty than he had originally calculated. what bluestreak didn't expect was for you to laugh, softly at first before riling up into a full blown fit.

he gives you a moment to recover, but you don't extend any sort of explanation concerning it.

"What?" he rumbles, a breath of a laugh within his words as well. "What did I say?"

"You're just...really funny," you hum, relaxing a bit back into the leather of the seat. "Okay, fine. Promise you'll take me home if I tell?"

bluestreak pretends to mull it over, but it only takes three seconds to sputter out his reply. "I'm not ready for you to go home just yet. So maybe a few more laps around town after you spill?"

"Deal." using your hand, you wipe away some of the happy tears that had gathered on the rim of your eyes.

[izzy513]

A Rough Night

Rafe Cameron x Pogue Reader

Elena Martinez moved to the Outer Banks from California when she was 10. Now 18 she thought she had overcome her big crush on Rafe Cameron. I gave her a name but...you could use yours if you want.

This takes place at the beginning of season 4.

Lmk if you want a Part 2 :)

I ran out of the hospital with tears blinding my vision. I knew everyone would be worried about me but it felt like too much. I got on my dirt bike and drove off. I wasn’t thinking and I didn’t care either. I blew past every red light and drove past streets that I rarely drive by.

It all happened so fast, a truck turned the corner out of nowhere and I made a sharp turn and ended up hitting the ground hard. My head was pounding and my right arm and leg along with my waist stung. I tried to sit up but felt really dizzy. Suddenly I felt someone gently take my arms.

“Jesus. Are you okay Elena?” 

I recognized that voice, I looked up and squinted my eyes. It was the one and only Rafe Cameron. Great. He helped me stand up and began walking me to his car. I looked back at my bike.

“My bike,” I managed to say. Rafe didn’t stop.“Elena, no offense but no one is going to steal that piece of shit,” he said. I rolled my eyes and groaned in pain when he helped me into the passenger seat and buckled my seatbelt. 

He ran his hand over his shaved head. “I’m calling 911.” I shot up, “No. I’m not going back there ever again. Rafe you can’t make me go back there.” 

“Well then there’s only one place I can take you. Shit Sarah’s gonna kill me.”

I turned to look at him, “Do not take me to Poguelandia either,’ I said. He took a deep breath, “What the hell were you thinking? You ran two stop signs and were going over 100 down the street. You would’ve died,” he lectured.

“Great, the last thing I need is a lecture from Rafe Cameron,” I told him. I felt the tears coming back then my eyes grew heavy. I felt him shake me, “Stay awake, the last thing I need is religious Romona’s granddaughter unconscious in my car.” 

“She’s dead,” I whispered. Rafe stayed silent for a few seconds before speaking up again, “If I don’t take you back, are you gonna tell Sarah?” I scoffed, “Yeah and let everyone hear that? They'd lose their shit,” I responded. “I thought you were mad at her anyway,” I added. I looked at him again but he kept his eyes on the road, “It’s complicated.” I nodded and looked out the window but then I began to feel dizzy again so I moved my gaze to my lap.

“You remind me of my dad,” I said. He looked at me a bit confused, “Your dad?” I nodded, “Yep, he was an assshole.” Rafe chuckled, “Thanks for the compliment.” I shook my head, “He had a bad childhood and joining the army didn’t help. When I was 10, I tripped and spilled juice on the floor.” I paused, my heart burning at the memory. “He was drunk and punched right in the middle of my chest. I cried the whole night.” 

“Did it really hurt that bad?” Rafe furrowed his brow and I laughed a bit. “It wasn’t the punch that hurt. It was the fact that he was the one who punched me. Anyway I called my abuela Ramona and that’s why I moved here.”

“So… you think I’d punch you in the chest?” I rolled my eyes at him again. “No dipshit, I just think that maybe Sarah feels the same way y’know,” I explained. He just silently nodded, “So what happened to your dad?” I rested my head on the seat, looking up at the ceiling of the car. “I think…he changed–or that’s  what my family kept trying to tell me. I chose to never see him again. But he got remarried and had two more kids then died of cancer when I was fifteen.” Rafe pinched his temples; I couldn’t blame his reaction, it was a pretty fucked up story.

Did you ever regret not seeing him?” Rafe’s questions were getting on my nerves a bit but I almost laughed at the thought that I had once wanted him to say anything to me. I was so young and that crush was too big for the small girl that I was. “Yeah, I do. It would’ve helped to know if he really did change or if he was still the drunk asshole my family always tried to protect.”

At this point we made it to his house or his family’s old house? Who knows anymore. Rafe opened the door, “You think you can walk?” I looked at my leg which had a huge scrape from the concrete. There goes me and Kiara’s hot girl summer. “Yeah,” I said. I stood up but the stinging was unbearable. Rafe took my arm and helped me inside the house where he placed me on the couch. I stood up to get a towel and nearly fell before Rafe caught me, his hands firmly holding my waist. I looked at the spot on the floor where I would’ve fallen then looked up at him to find that he was already staring at me. I could still feel my heart beating fast but now I felt like it was beating even faster. He cleared his throat then put me back on the couch. “Just stay here,” he said.

He left for a few minutes then came back with peroxide, tissues, and some kind of ointment. He knelt down, “Don’t scream at me okay, I’m trying to help you,” he said. I would’ve done it myself but I was too tired and messed up to protest. 

He began cleaning the scrapes on my arm and leg, it hurt like a bitch but I tried to ignore the pain. “Lift your shirt.” I looked at him as if he were crazy. He chuckled at my reaction, “You bled through your shirt a bit.” I looked down and saw a red stain on my white shirt which was now torn. I lifted my shirt enough to see the full damage. It was another scrape about the size of one of those big band aids and there was some blood but not too much. I looked away as Rafe began to clean it.

I felt my eyes grow heavy again and I rested my head against the couch before Rafe shook me again. “You can’t sleep, we don’t know if you have a concussion.” I groaned in annoyance, “I haven’t slept in three days. Maybe I’m just tired,” I countered. 

He ran his fingers through his shaved head again. “I’ll just sleep on your couch and tell everyone that I was being an idiot as usual and stayed at one of my abuela’s family friends places or something,” I told him. “And how are you gonna get back to pogueland or whatever the hell it’s called.” I hadn’t thought about that part yet. “Rafe I don’t know my head is pounding and these lights are killing me. I don’t even know what 1+1 is right now,” I said, taking one of the pillows off the couch and covering my eyes with it. 

“Fine, I’ll take you in the morning when they're still asleep,” he said. He sat next to me and I lifted the pillow to look at him. “What are you doing?” I asked. “You said your head was pounding, I’m not gonna leave you here so that you could die in your sleep,” he told me.

“You’re so dramatic, I’m not going to die in my sleep.” And with that I put the pillow back over my head and tried to rest. While I was on the verge of falling asleep Rafe left again but I kept my eyes closed. When I heard his footsteps return, I felt him place a blanket over me, trying not to put it directly on my wounds. He then checked my pulse and took the pillow off my head.

I would’ve yelled at him and took it back but I was too tired. He moved a piece of my hair from my face and felt a shiver run down my spine. I guess the kid in me still wasn’t over Rafe Cameron. 

~ ~ ~

Early in the morning Rafe woke me up and handed me a sweater. “Your shirts ripped up so just put this on.” I didn’t argue, I threw it over my shirt. Luckily, he had an unused toothbrush still in the package so I was able to brush my teeth. After that we got into his car and we drove to Poguelandia. Luckily it was 7:00 am so everyone was probably still asleep.

Rafe didn’t park close since he didn’t want anyone to see him. “I’m sorry about your grandma, she was a really nice lady.” I gave him a small smile, “Thanks Rafe. Oh and thanks for not letting me die last night too,” I said. He smiled, “I thought you said you weren’t going to die.” I pursed my lips together, “Who knows, maybe if you didn’t find me I would’ve.” 

I got out of the car, “I still want my piece of shit back.” He shook his head, “Of course you do,” he said. I shut the door and walked toward the house. 

When I got inside JJ was on the couch sleeping until he heard me and woke up. “Guys, Elena’s back.” He yelled and got up super fast and everyone else came into the living room. Kiara saw the huge scrape on my leg. “Holy shit Elena what happened?” I noticed Sarah staring at the sweater Rafe gave me. “My abuela died so I went for a drive to clear my head–

“You crashed your bike didn’t you?” Pope said. “Yes Pope, I crashed my fucking bike. I ended up getting help from a family friend and everything is fine,” I said to them. “Wow, and I thought you finally lost your virginity,” JJ said. I grabbed an empty beer can and threw it at him. 

The day went on and I stayed in my room most of the day. I couldn’t get Rafe out of my head and I hated it. I felt like the dumb 6th grader again, who had a crush on him though he was already in high school. But I also felt guilty since this was the same person who made Sarah's life hell.

Suddenly I heard someone knock on my door, “It’s open,” I said. Sarah opened the door and I sat up. She looked outside the door then closed it. 

“Elena, I don’t want to put any pressure on you or anything and you don’t even have to answer me but–

“I was with Rafe last night,” I said before she could finish. She sat down beside me, “I mean he didn’t hit me with a car or anything. He saw me crash and took care of me–it was weird. He even stayed up to make sure I didn’t die in sleep or whatever,” I explained. 

I could tell there was some kind of relief and happiness in her eyes. I mean if I was her I wouldn’t have expected Rafe to do that either. 

“Good, I’m glad you’re okay,” she smiled. 

~ ~ ~

A few days later there was a brand new bike sitting in front of the house, it had a note on it that said: This one is better than your piece of shit.

[loki-us]

Just like Thor was changed by Jane, Loki was forever changed by Mobius

[mortysmith]

Fuck you season five episode nine genuinely some of the worst shit they clobbered together

[astrxealis]

dear gods i adore horror tbh but i am way too sensitive to it

[gremlinhourz]

genuinely expecting to fail my first class in college!! and its like as much as i can get upset at myself for continuing the cycle of procrastination that ive been trying to break free from for years, i also feel like the reason im primarily upset is because i feel like im disappointing others and/or giving them a bad impression of me. like im not upset because i think i could have done more, im upset because i think other people will think i could have done more. when like honestly with school ive just developed an "it is what it is" attitude, like all i can do is try and try again, and if that means taking eng111, crashing and burning, but most importantly learning, then taking eng111 again, so fucking be it

[satorena]

༊*·˚ D!CK OFF LIMITS !?

bad ☆ summary. why won’t he let you suck his dīck?

warnings. explicit content. 18+. foul language. cunningulus. fīngerīng. premature ejacūlatīon. semi public sēx. usage of toys. facials. mirror sēx. dom/sub undertones. preestablished relationships. reader is a fiend for his dick. afab!reader. could be angsty at some point ? fwb to . . . lovers ? 7.4k words (kill me now).

rena's ☆ note. this idea came to me while i was drunk.

you wonder if gojo thinks you have gingivitis.

that thought was unlikely, as he was always eager to shove his tongue down your mouth, tongues sloshing and secreting saliva as his hands roamed between your thighs, knuckles deep into your cunt.

then maybe he assumed you were a biter— which would be highly hypocritical of him, as he’s known to get on his knees in the nearest bathroom stall and flip your skirt up, push your panties to the side and plunge his canines into the flesh of your ass before tongue fucking you.

well, maybe he simply didn’t get off on pleasing you— yeah you knew it wasn’t that one, if the way he thrusted his bulge in the air whenever your thighs wrapped around his head for relief every time he ate you out said anything.

you simply didn’t understand— what man would refuse receiving head after giving the nastiest of it?

your fingers clawed at a snowy pile of hair, back arched as you ground your hips into his mouth. he ate your pussy like a starved man, sloppy and coordinated, as his lips latched onto yours as if he’d die without your taste in his mouth

his tongue swiped up your juices as he lapped at your folds, dragging the top of his wet muscles against your core, nibbling at your puffy clit. gojo was on his knees, moaning like a slut in between your thighs as you used him to chase your orgasm.

“ngh, fuck— right there baby,” you mewled, toes curling as your back hit the cold wall of the bathroom stall. his hands gripped at your ass, caressing and squeezing the mounds to pull you in tighter than you’d already been. your mind felt hazy, so overcome with lust that you were ready to burst your dam down his throat. “oh m’ goddd, so fuckin’ close toruuu!”

“give it all t’me pretty baby,” his words come out muffled, only pulling away just slightly. his rosy lips are glossed your arousal and his saliva, a consistency so thick it connects a strand of fluid from your bottom lips to his own. his skin is blotched in lust, cerulean eyes dazed in awe. “cum in my mouth princess, needa taste you.”

your orgasm washes over you before you can even register it, a sensation so powerful you cry out as your dam erupts. splurges of your essence shoots from your cunt down to his mouth, and as you roll your eyes to the back of your skull, you notice so does he. his fingernails dig into the flesh of your skin, pinning you down as he humbly welcomes your cum.

“s’gooddd, shit toru!” you feel your bottom lip quivering, limbs twitching from overstimulation as he continues to ravish you. your groin tingles in heat, body weak as it succumbs to the pleasure gojo gives it. you feel weak, a feeling you’re never able to adapt to no matter how much he attempts to prepare you for it. “uhn uhn— too much, can’t take it!” your head shakes from side to side, nails clawing at his scalp as you attempt to push him away.

the pad of his fingers slip from your ass to snake in between your legs, spanking your wet pussy thrice to keep you in check, and your knees crumbles. gojo latches his lips at your clit once more, and you feel the world blackout. “stop that— fuckin’ take it baby. i know my good girl can take it.”

he leaves you no choice, eyes trailing upwards to land on your figure, the dip in your back so sinful that you feel as though both your bodies have merged into one. his tongue works so deep into you, it feels as though you’re both puzzle pieces that were made to connect to one another. your thighs are quivering around his head, and you feel your back slipping against the wall. shit.

“mmhm, nooo, ‘m gonna cum again!” you pout, tears built at your lash line now streaking down your cheeks. it’s all too much— the sensation so raw that you look for an escape. you want to push him off, to take a breather and regain your composure. but he’s looking at you with such expectations, eyes shimmering with eagerness as he lifts both your legs onto his shoulder for support.

he manhandles your body like it’s nothing— like you weigh nothing. your limp body now slides upwards, higher up in the air than you’d been a second ago. gojo rises to his full height and motorboats into your dripping cunt.

you wail out, head throw back against the stall as a desperate mouth gnaws at your folds. you’re sure he’s dripping from his mouth to his chin, a mixture of fluids so prominent that it dribbles down to the marble floor. “haaah, oh shit— baby, i can’t— fuck, y’eat my pussy sooo fuckin’ good!” the praises flow past your tongue so naturally, hands torn between pushing and pulling away from the painful pleasure. “nghhh, i— ‘m gonna— holy shit!”

your back hits the wall in waves of full body twitches, your cunt clamping down on his tongue as you weakly splurts drops of more cum. fat tears stain your cheeks, blood rushing hotly from head to toe, spraying gojo’s face in your essence.

“atta fuckin’ girl.” he groans into your pussy, almost more drunk on the taste of you than you are. he flicks his tongue up and down, dragging your orgasm as far as he can, completely enthralled by the desperate thrusts of your hips into his face. you’re smearing his face with your fluids, and from the fucked out look on your face— eyes crossed and tongue lolled out, he decides this might be the best way to go. “there we go— yeah baby, jus’ like that, mhmm.”

the timeline from your coming down to actually coming down to the floor is all blurry, but you’re barely able to stand on your two feet when you feel his hand cup at your chin tightly. his index finger raises your face to stare up at his, all moist from fluids and humidity but you don’t think he’s ever looked prettier.

his lips meet yours desperately, lips sloshing over one another as the taste of your cum now sits atop your taste pallets. his free hand snakes around your waist, holding you still as you lazily loop your arms around his neck, deepening the kiss.

he’s so good at it all— the nibbles of his teeth at your bottom lip making your legs go weak, stomach churning in more lust. he smells like a mixture of you and his expensive cologne— so satoru like, that you’re positive if this keeps going, you may blackout on the cold floor of this bathroom stall in the club.

he kisses you like he’s got something to prove, and eventually your lungs are filled with his provided oxygen, and you truly believe you’re going to pass out. you pull just slightly away, much to his disdain. he whines, tip of your noses just barely an inch away as you pant over his cupid’s bow. “fuck.”

“mmhm, that good?” gojo teases, the corner of his mouth tugging into a smirk you’re too familiar with. you don’t have it in you to flick his forehead.

instead, you opt with sighing. “that good.” your hands trail down his nape, nails grazing at the sensitive skin beneath his undercut, scratching and lightly pulling at his locks. he shudders at your touch, leaning forward to rest his sweat forehead against yours.

your touches lower from his shoulders down to his chest, grazing your fingers over his perky buds, teasing his nipples. he’s so touch starved, jaw slackened as he moans— breath warm as it fans your face. your hands begins to lower down to his hips, seductive touches that has him biting his lips, hips instinctively jerking to meet with your light grazing.

you keep steady eye contact with him as your hands finally land at his raging bulge. the material over his hard-on is damp in his pre cum, and it feels hot beneath your touch. with a slight tilt of your head, “lemme take care of you, toru.”

you can see him battling his own thoughts. his pupils widen in lust, orbs swimming in excitement as you palm his erection more precisely. he’s twitching beneath your cupped hand, humping against your palm as his throat erupts a desperate pant.

you wonder if today’s the day he’s finally going to let you see his dick— to let you swallow him whole and please him just as he does with you. you want to get on your knees and take him so far down your throat that tears build and you force gags back down. you’re sure he’s all pretty and pink, a length to match his abnormally tall height and girth ready to stretch your throat muscles.

but as always, just like the night before, he chuckles and shakes his head. he’s refusing you again, hands gripping at your waist to push you away from him.

“you know i can’t do that baby,” he sighs, a small smile appearing on his wet lips. you can tell he’s frustrated with himself, so unsure as the pad of his thumbs rub the bare skin of your waist. you jut your bottom lip in annoyance, although expecting his refusal. “maybe next time, yeah?”

you’re annoyed as you push him away, pushing your skirt back down so it falls down your ass. and you’re sure he notices too. you don’t object when he grabs the toilet paper from the stall to clean the left over mess between your thighs— though your arms do cross over the flimsy material of your tight top over your chest.

“mhm, sure.”

☆ ☆

about a week later, you’re on all fours on his annoyingly large king-sized bed, hands clawing at his sheets as you push your hips back into his fingers. he’s scissoring your cunt open, knuckles-deep in and every precise thrusts has you seeing stars.

“yesyesyes!” you nod your head feverishly, babbles slipping past your tongue and dribbling down the damp sheets beneath you. “oh m’god, feels sooo fuckin’ good, ngh!” there you sat naked and exposed, getting the life fucked out of you by his fingers alone, a length so impossible that you’re convinced his index and middle finger eventually bump your cervix with how deep he works himself into you.

gojo lands a few kisses at the back of your thighs, kneeled down at the edge of his bed as he twists his fingers into your cunt. he’s enamoured by the sloppiness of your tight pussy gripping at his digits so desperately, a squelching sound so harmonious it has him rubbing his own thighs against one another.

“face down, baby.” gojo commands, his free hand coming up to press at your lower back. you obey his order, pressing your cheek down against his sheets, arms silently thanking the man for the break of supporting your body up. you mewl when you feel him plunging his teeth into the soft skin of your ass, before running a wet tongue over the stinging pain. “there’s my good girl. heh, such an obedient lil’ thing.”

you lay pressed against his bed as you take his ruthless pounding, the tip of his fingers reaching the gummy spot that has stars dancing at the back of your eyelids. god, he always knew how to make a mess out of you— your body his temple, a book he’s dead over a million times and has learned to memorize.

“cute lil hole jus’ seems sooo enticing,” you feel the warmth of his breath fanning against your twitching rim, waves of warm air tickling the muscle. it doesn’t surprise you when you feel his wet tongue caressing your tight hole with light touches, just pushing slightly past unspoken boundaries. your stomach tightens the more relaxed he becomes, lapping from the bottom of your cunt up to your asshole, savouring you whole as he works himself into your clingy pussy.

“t-toru, oh yes baby— ‘m gonna cummm!” you whine, sobbing when your orgasm finally does catch up to you— as if he hadn’t already known. you walls clamp down on his fingers for dear life, folds twitching as they secrete your honeyed essence all over his hand and down to his sheets.

gojo never lets up, stringing along as he encourages you even further, “that’s it babyyyy, there we go.” drool slips past his kiss-bitten lips and down to your sopping wet cunt, tongue still working its way at the tightness of your forbidden hole. you look so fucking cute all shaken up, barely keeping yourself together as your moans echoes off his walls and fade into the stillness of the night.

he’s so fucking hard it hurts, but he’d take seeing you wrecked and ruined by his hands alone over the selfish tendencies of asking you to take care of him back. and he knew you’d known that already, if the way your body immediately lurches forward to melt into the sloth ess of silk sheets beneath you said anything.

you feel large hands grip at your thighs, trailing up before landing on your ass. he spreads apart your cheeks, sticky residue spreading your pussy lips with a sinful sound. you shiver, the cold breeze hitting your cunt a mix of overstimulated senses hitting at once.

he collects your liquids at the pad of his fingers, before wrapping his tongue around the digits. he nearly cums at your taste alone, “fuckkk, y’taste so fuckin’ sweet, princess.” and he pushes forward to drag his tongue along the evidence of your orgasm on your thighs, trailing up to the cleft of your ass and to your cunt, cleaning up after his mess.

you know better, and yet you still try anyway. with a shy tilt of your head, you look back to the starved man between your thighs and offer the prettiest smile you can, cheeks flushed in heat and lips glossed in saliva. “y’gonna let me take care of you yet?”

it doesn’t surprise you when he chuckles, releasing the fat of your cunt from his mouth with a nasty pop! to rise up to his full height, bending over your body to entrap yours within his arms. your back arches as you tilt your head backwards to meet his gaze, boobs pressed up together.

he stares at you with an unreadable expression, though the prominent dimple sitting in his cheek pops. “this was more than enough for me, ya little minx.”

☆ ☆

“if we get c-caught, i’ll fucking kill you.” you whisper, hands curling at the edge of his office desk. your eyes repeatedly darted towards the unlocked door, right before you, where anybody could walk into his office and see their boss on his knees for you during his lunch break, eating you out.

he pulls away with a dreamy sigh, a firm grip on your ass jiggling the cheek. “a man can’t enjoy his lunch in peace? not my fault ‘m starving.” there’s a filthy string of your essence and his saliva that connects from his lips to your lower ones.

“get real!” you hiss at him, despite the familiar feeling of heat licking at your limbs. “you asked me to bring your lunch and— ohhh!” your words soon die in your throat as your head rolls forward, and your bottom lip now tucked beneath your teeth. the warmth slide of his tongue at your clit has your nails scratching the surface of his desk, and your back curves into him.

“you worry too much,” gojo mumbles, before pressing a kiss to your pussy. he feels it throb against him, as he hums and runs the pad of his fingers against your messy folds. you shudder at the stimulation, your hips subconsciously grinding down on his fingers to follow his wavelength. with a smug smile, “see? at least yer pussy’s honest wimme— just lemme take care of her.”

“f-fucking bastard.” you grit through your teeth, though you make no objections. you could act high and mighty all you wanted, you never pushed him away whenever he offered to please you. it was almost like he solely got off on it— your pleasure alone. “i h-hate you.”

“love you too, princess.” he smirks, and you decide to brush off the tight squeeze at your heart at his words.

his tongue fucked into your hole yet again, and your eyes roll to the back of your skull. you really couldn’t get enough of this— of him. you’d repay him your gratitudes if he’d let you. you’d push him back, lay him down and suck his dick eagerly if only he’d let you. you wonder the length of his cock, if it curves, how flushed his tip must get or how much pre leaks from his slit. you want it so bad, and fuck if only he’d let you. but,

he doesn’t.

he gives and gives but never takes. he’ll call you and tells you he’s in dire need of eating you out— of making you cum, and the minute you return the same energy, he finds an excuse to walk away. you’re slowly losing your mind— you crave the taste of him on your tongue, to hear how whiney he sounds once his tip hits the back of your throat, or how pretty he’d look with his eyes rolled to the back of his skull and hips thrusting uncontrollably into your mouth.

“toruuu,” you whine, tilting your head back. tears build in your eyes as they accumulate at your lash line. your bottom lip juts, a soft pout resting on your lips as you flutter your lashes at the man behind you. even with a mouth full of your pussy, his eyes never lie. “c’mon, lemme return the— ngh, favour,” you feel a beat of a pause at your words, and you egg it on further. “i know you’re rock hard. . . you c-can put it in, i won’t, mmhm—mind.”

he swears he cums. he swears he feels his balls tighten and release hot and thick strings of cum in his slacks, briefs tainted white with shame. you were going to be the death of him— you and your doe eyes, glossy lips and perky ass. it grows sticky between his thighs, but his hips twitch as his throat erupts a guttural groan.

“you can’t just fucking say that,” gojo whines, nuzzling his nose into the cleft of your ass. he’s whimpering against your skin, breath warm and moist as his panting grows heavier by the second. you shake your hips against his face, batting your full lashes, and he groans even louder. “you have no idea what you do to me—fucking hell.”

“enlighten me then.” you reach your hand out to fluff his pile of damp hair. he instinctively leans into your touch, peppering kisses all over your skin. you’d never thought you’d have the gojo satoru on his knees for you, demanding you let him please you. “let me suck your dick toru, ‘m real good at it.”

his breath hitches in his throat and you’re positive you’ve finally got him. he’s going to cave in and sit on his office chair, pull his pants down and let you handle his mess. he’s going to realize he’s wasted plenty of time pushing the idea away the second you swallow his length whole and—

“i’m sure you are,” gojo speaks, but you can tell there’s a but following. you sigh, and he offers a sheepish smile in return. “but you know ‘m good here. just wanna make you feel good— your pleasure is mine, i promise. trust me on that, yeah?”

all arguments are thrown out the window the instant his lips latch back onto your sloppy ones.

☆ ☆

“uhn uhn. . . ‘s too muchhh!” you whine, squirming in his lap in attempts to run away. your clit ached almost painfully, repeatedly abused by the vibrations of the toy gojo had stimulating. the soft hums of the vibrator echoed in the room in harmony with your pleads, but gojo was a sadist and unfortunately you might’ve been a masochist. “c-can’t cum anymore!”

“aweee, but of course you can!” he kisses the sensitive skin on your neck, before nuzzling his nose into the crook. his legs spread wider to further open your shaky ones, and his free hand cups at your breast. “you pussying out on me, baby?”

no, you were not. “of c-course not,” you muster to glare at him through the reflection of the mirror before you both. piercing blue eyes never left your body for a second, drinking up every reaction you had to offer him. you nearly felt . . . shy at his gaze. “just hurts a little, fuckkk, you mean b-bitch.”

“mmhm.” gojo nods, fingers tweaking at the buds of your stiff nipples. he rolls the bud between his knuckles, drawing out broken moans out of you as the consistent buzz of the vibrator at your pussy doesn’t let up. he presses another kiss, at your temple, “you’re my good girl, i don’t expect otherwise.”

you bite your lip, cheeks flushing in what feels like embarrassment. him and his damn praises. he knows what he’s doing to you, rosy lips tugging into that smirk as his facial expression scream smug. you wish you could punch the bastard right in the face, but that thought is quickly gone when he pinches hard at your tits.

“shittt,” you mewl, grinding your hips down on his. you feel his bulge poking at your ass— so hard and prominent, proof of his arousal. his lap is drenched in your juices, evidence of multiple rounds seeping into the material of his sweatpants. “so fuckin’ good, hnng, you’re sooo fuckin’ good to me.” you raise an arm to grab at the base of his neck, threading your fingers through his soft locks.

you ooze sex appeal, everything you do and say so erotic, and gojo is easily your slave. “yeah?” he mumbles into your skin, though he looks at your reflection through snowy lashes. your back arches sinfully, ass pressed so snuggly against his lap and your pussy leaking buckets worth of cum. “tell me, what else am i?”

the vibrator attacking your clit has your left leg shaking uncontrollably, the knot in your stomach quickly tightening. you chew on your bottom lip, eyelids resting shut as you focus on spewing your next words, carefully selecting them. you can’t help the chuckle that reaches your mouth instead of a moan, “a bitch.”

“oh?” gojo cocks an eyebrow, another chuckle now audible despite it not coming from you. he drags the vibrator down your slippery folds and all the way back up to your clit, and you tighten your hold on his hair. “those weren’t supposed to be your next words, sweetheart.”

“y-you’re a bitch,” you continue regardless, and gojo can’t deny he’s attracted to you for your sheer audacity. he’s always been a fiend for a good challenge. “won’t even let me give you head— ngh, thought i was the one with a pussy.”

“you’re wounding my ego here,” gojo slides his hand from your tits and trail it all the way up to your mouth. he spreads your lips with two fingers, before hooking them at the corner of your mouth. “callin’ me a pussy? that’s a low blow, baby.”

you squint at him through the foggy mirror, applying pressure to the bulge poking at your ass. you smile when he groans into your ear, “you got a small dick or somethin’? gotta say— fuck, s-sure doesn’t feel like you do.” you throw your head back onto his shoulder, lips grazing over the shell of his ear, “should i check for myself? hnng, see if satoru owns a pussy?”

there’s a click in the air and suddenly the humming of the vibrator stops. finally. had you finally blown his fuse? ironically, your clit secretes more liquid as the idea of him finally pulling his pants off and dicking you down comes to mind. once his pride deflates, he does whatever he can to prove otherwise.

you’re sure you’ve got him.

“heh, you’ve got some nerve.” gojo snorts, and you don’t register how he’s manhandle you to the floor, hands holding your entire upper body steady as your thighs now wrap around his shoulders. the position has your back arched like a cat, and you raise your head up to watch him confusedly through the glass mirror.

two firm hands grip at your ass cheeks, spreading them apart as he licks his lips hungrily, “it’s lookin’ like you’ll never know.” he bares his fangs at you, and you sigh before he feasts again.

☆ ☆

it doesn’t feel right. none of it does. it’s nowhere remotely near cheating, and yet, as this man litters your neck and chest with loving kisses, you feel your stomach churning in guilt.

here he is, offering himself to you, willing to give you what you’d been deprived off since you’d started your arrangement with gojo— willing to rock your world, bump hips and coax an penetrative orgasm out of you— but all you could think about was how wrong this all felt.

though a pleasant smell, these sheets don’t smell like him. they don’t feel like him either. instead of wide cerulean eyes and untamed white hair is stern brown eyes and kept blonde hair. where should be blotches of red on flawless skin is stress lines infused skin.

you felt awful, burning touches trailing between your thighs instead of that electricity that had your stomach twisting with butterflies.

“is everything alright?” the man pulls away from your legs, and questions. he’s so kind, willing to ask how you’re feeling in the midst of it all, and all you can think about is gojo.

no, nothing’s fine. “yeah, i’m good.” you lie, offering a smile. you’re a good liar, and it seems he falls for your words as he proceeds, pushing your panties to the side and works his tongue into you.

his movements are calculated and measured, paying attention to all areas of your cunt. he eats you out good, there’s no denying so, has your toes curling and back arching off his mattress. you lower your hand to tighten his locks, but even that feels wrong— it’s not as fluffy as gojo’s. you think you feel hair gel between your knuckles.

your mind runs a mile an second, overwhelmed by the sole idea that you were offering your body to another man. gojo wasn’t yours— not in the slightest, and yet, as he sucked on your clit and gripped at your thighs, your chest felt unreasonably tight.

you couldn’t do this any longer.

“wait— wait, please stop.” you push his head away, bottom lip quivering. he pulls away instantly, a string of saliva connecting from his lips to your cunt. you feel sick at the confused look on his face. “i can’t— i can’t do this. i’m so sorry.”

the man stares at you for a moment, though never maliciously, and you feel like wanting to crawl into a hole. he nods his head, before pushing your panties back to where they belong, and pushes himself up. silence fills the air for a while, and you’re holding back tears. you’re not sure why, though.

“it’s gojo, isn’t it?” he asks, though he’s not posing a question. he knows, surely everybody knows that you belong to him in both body and soul, but this has only been a recently found discovery for you.

your silence speaks volumes, and the man nods once more.

“yeah, that’s what i thought too.”

☆ ☆

to say he was surprised was definitely an understatement. he wasn’t expecting you to show up at his place, despite already having given you a key to his apartment.

you barged through his bedroom door, a location you were already too familiar with and unknowingly had become so accustomed to. your chest is heaving as if you’d ran a marathon before showing up here, and he wants to kiss the pout off your lips. “pants off, now.”

gojo rises from his bed to stand at his full height, a surprised smile stretching onto his face. “woah, at least take me out on a date first! i’m not just some whore.” his hands comically rise up in surrender, and your frown deepens.

“why won’t you let me give you head?” you ask him before you can even process your choice of wording. when his brows jump to his hairline at your boldness, you feel your face warm in embarrassment. “i mean seriously— am i the problem?”

“what?” gojo blinks, taking quick strides towards your fuming self. he shakes his head feverishly, “no, that’s not it at all—”

“then why do you keep rejecting me?” you cut him off, crossing your arms over your chest. you probably look and sound desperate, but the truth is you were. the first few times could be deemed funny, but there’s so much rejection a girl can take before it starts to become an insecurity. “why do you keep pushing me away? am i that unattractive to you?”

you’d never seen him look so panicked in his life. had it been under any other circumstance, you woulda laughed at the way his pupils blew widely and how his hands started waving all over the place, “no! jesus, are you kidding me— have you seen yourself? what sane man would think that—”

“what sane man wouldn’t want sex?” you bite back, and he’s taken aback. you see it in the way the words in his mouth die down, the way his body stills just slightly, the way his arms drop to his sides. you continue, “what sane man wouldn’t want head? what sane man solely focuses on pleasing a woman and not himself—”

“hey,” gojo frowns. “any sane man would aim to please his partner first and foremost.”

“well usually sane men accept the favour when offered back to them!” you counter, and once more, gojo was cornered into the wall. he remained quiet, an ideaology uncharacteristic to a man like himself, and waited for you to get it off your chest.

“it’s just. . .” you sigh, licking your lips. and he watches you, intently. you’re almost too embarrassed to say it, but enough was enough. “i just don’t get it! i’m thinking it’s because i’m unattractive to you but—”

“i’ve literally came in my pants from eating you out.” he interrupts, raising an eyebrow. your face deadpans as does his. he’s dead serious too. oh that bastard, “multiple times, may i add. try again.”

“then it has to be you think i’m dirty.” you assume, and he tilts his head to the side with an expression that screams ‘seriously’. your annoyance builds up the more he looks at you like you’re crazy for him denying you of his pleasure. “i can assure you i’m clean— i’m not some fucking whore.”

“and i can assure you that thought has never once crossed my mind.” gojo snorts, body language now looser. his hands sit in the pockets of his sweats, a taunting smile on his lips. “what’s the next excuse?”

“oh that’s rich coming from you,” you sneer, poking your finger at his chest. he snorts again, and you feel like you’re about to lose your mind. “what else could it possibly be? you’re so fucking confusing, toru, i have no idea what goes on in your mind!”

“you, all the time.” gojo shrugs as if it’s the most obvious thing. he says it as if you asked him if the sky was blue or if grass was green. “you go through my mind all the time. it’s that simple, really.”

“stop the bullshit, satoru.” you frown, pinching the bridge of your nose. your head was starting to ache, and you’d come for closure on this torment, but of course he had to stretch it out.

“but i’m being so serious?” he tilts his head. “it really is just you. you don’t think i want your lips wrapped around my cock? to feel how tight your pussy would be around me? seriously?”

“then why don’t you let me?!” you sigh exasperatedly, throwing your arms in the air. you didn’t understand this at all— you were both on the same page here, so why didn’t he let you? was he ashamed or something?

he goes quiet again, and you’re contemplating on storming out of his room. you give him a few seconds to collect his thoughts, to decide on whether he wants to finally tell you the truth or find another plausible excuse that would have you drive back home.

there’s this look of embarrassment all over his face, his eyes unable to look at you. he scratches the corner of his mouth, lips tugging into a sheepish smile. “i’m. . . scared. kinda.”

you blink at him. “wait— are you a virgin?”

“no!” he immediately defends himself, and you raise an eyebrow at his sudden eagerness. he waves his hands around again to affirm his statement, “i’m not!”

“so. . . you’re a slut?” you ask instead, and he face palms himself. the nerve he had, to face palm himself when he’s giving you the faintest of clues. what were you supposed to understand from that alone?

“y/nnnn!” he drags out your name childishly, the skin of his cheeks flushed a bright pink. he hides his face in the palms of his hands, as if to cower himself away from this discussion. you think the sight is cute actually— a grown man shy about his sex life. how ironic.

“just spit it out.” you tut and he peels his hands away from his face. your eyes narrow as you wait on his answer, watching him fidget with his fingers and shy his gaze away from you. the wall at your side had to be so damn interesting if he couldn’t hold eye contact with you.

you sigh, “i promise i won’t make fun of you.”

your word alone seems to offer some sort of comfort. his lips part to speak, but it feels like an eternity and a half before words finally come out. “i. . . i don’t wanna embarrass myself in front of you.”

now you’re confused. “whadya mean?”

he grumbles, lips falling into that pout he does whenever he doesn’t get something done his way. there’s a crease in his brows, a frown so deep you’re worried you said something wrong.

“i didn’t want to give you the ick, okay?” gojo finally sputters, the blush on his cheeks now spreading down the base of his neck. he can feel his heartbeat thudding excessively loud against his rib cage, and his hands are starting to get moist.

woah, he must be really embarrassed. but about what? was he insecure about his penis?

“why would you give me the ick, toru?” you speak slowly, not wanting to scare him off. you take a step closer to him when you notice he took one back, resting a gentle hand on his bicep. your thumb rubs at his skin in what you hope is a soothing manner.

his eyes shift from the wall to your gentle touch. his bottom lip quivers and he takes in a big breath, before redirecting his gaze on you.

“because you’re you and i’m me!” he starts off, as if ready to confess everything. you take it as a good sign however. “it’s you we’re talking about— god, you’re so pretty and sexy and kind, and so attractive it fucking hurts— i’ve literally busted to your taste alone! i’m so fucking whipped it’s embarrassing. i literally think about you all the time— in bed, in the car, in the shower— i think about how good you smell and how sweet you taste and how addictive your smile is! all i have to do is think about you and i’m instantly hard— i’m like a fucking dog you trained!”

for once today, you’re left speechless.

“and- and,” he continues, “i had to master self-control. me, satoru gojo, had to learn to hold myself back. do you know how many times i’ve nearly folded? hm? how many times i almost caved in and damn near ripped your clothes off with my teeth? you’ve turned me into an animal! i’ve wanted you for an eternity, but i know myself— i wouldn’t last a second with my dick in your mouth! that’s what i’m scared of, i’m scared of embarrassing myself to you and you’ll run off or something and i’ll end up rotting and dying alone from embarrassment and—”

“okay, okay.” you hold a hand up to cut off his rant. he was starting to babble, and soon he would flow into an inescapable hole of self-wallowing. “i think i get it now.”

he’s breathing heavy, pupils blown wide. his lips are quivering and you can tell he’s really anxious of your answer. you’d never seen him so shaken, as if your next words would make or break his entire world.

well, here goes nothing. “i hooked up with another man.” you think you heart his heart shatter in his chest. his face goes slack as does his body, and he immediately reverts his eyes away from yours.

“oh.”

you realize you could’ve started a bit differently. “it didn’t really go far, because i was so preoccupied thinking about you.” you sigh shakily. “everything felt wrong, even when i tried convincing myself it wasn’t, but i couldn’t help but think of you, even with another man around.”

gojo remains quiet, and you’re not even sure where you’re going with this. what are these feelings you’re feeling?

“listen, i don’t know what that guilt was but i know i never want to feel it again.” your hand proceeds to run at his skin. he hasn’t pushed you off yet, so you’re hoping it’s working. “this whole time i was thinking i was unappealing to you, and you’re afraid of flattering me?”

gojo shoots his head up at that, “flattering you?”

you snort, loving the dumb look on his face. he didn’t have a fucking clue, did he? “do you have any idea what that would do to my ego? knowing i was able to make you nut off of head alone?”

“heyyy, don’t go using it against me!” he whines, pouting. “’s your fault anyway— how is somebody that perfect? i don’t get it, you’re genuinely unreal. i almost don’t like it.”

well he surely knew a way around with his words. you giggle, sliding the hand around his bicep up to the back of his neck. your other arm mimics, as your fingers card through his undercut. you can feel him shuddering beneath your touch, and he instinctively cups at your waist.

“now that i know your reasoning, i’m not gonna pressure you into anything you don’t wanna do.” you stare him up through your lashes. you weren’t sure how you didn’t see it before, but now they everything is clear, you swear you see hearts swimming in his orbs. cute. “but, you wouldn’t scare me off, toru. i can’t believe i’m saying this but i might be stuck with you— you say you’re a trained dog, then what does that make me? thought about you while another man ate me out.”

he frowns at that. oops. “he wasn’t better than me. . . was he?”

“never.” you shake your head, and feel the way his shoulders sag in relief. “and if it makes you feel better, we didn’t kiss and i never gave him a blowjob.”

he’s still pouting, but his nose scrunches in the way he does when he wants you to drown him with attention. when had you start noticing these details? “it does. . . i guess.”

“toruuu, you have to forgive me.” it’s your turn to pout, nails scraping at his scalp as your lashes flutter. you rise to the tip of your toes to plant a soft kiss on his lips— lustless. there’s a soft smack that separates both your pair of mouths, and you see the corner of his mouth threaten to twitch into a smile. his hold on your waist tightens and pulls you in closer. “want me to show you just how sorry am i?”

“mhm,” he mumbles, eyes stuck on the plumpness of your lips. he wants them back on his, and that’s exactly what he does, leaning forward to seal another chaste kiss. when he does pull away, it’s just slightly, tips of your noses still grazing one another. he bumps noses with yours, “prove it t’me.”

your cheeks feel like they’ll split with how widely you’re smiling, but that ends as soon as it came, when he lunges forward to kiss you again.

his jaw slacks as he ravishes your lips, tongues sloshing as he releases pretty moans into your mouth. you fed him everywhere— his tongue dancing at the roof of your mouth, his hands caressing your ass, the rhythm of his heartbeat through his chest vibrating against your own.

you walk forwards, lips never leaving his, as his steps move backwards. he tastes as sweet as always, a faint cherry flavour resting on his taste buds. soon enough he’s laid on his back on his own bed with you hovering him, your thighs resting at his sides. his hands grip at the meat on your legs.

“‘m gonna make you feel so good,” you pull away from his lips and trail your hand down his torso, all the way to his briefs’ waistband. “you’ve never had anything like it.” surely enough, he’s harder than he’s ever been, the outline of his cock seeping through the material of his pants. your hand slides lower to cup at the bulge, feeling up on his dick through your fingers, and he whines into your mouth, hips thrusting up into your touch.

“p-please, i’m— oh fuckkk,” he begs, moans croaking out of his throat as you slip your hand into his underwear. your touches are light, wanting to tease him as you collect endless beads of pre cum at the tip of your fingers. his hips never cease to buck into your palm, desperate for more.

“enough waiting, hm?” you tug down at his undergarments, and immediately get slapped in the face. his dick is nothing to scoff at— you’d only seen and felt it through the material of his pants, but now that it was bare and right before your eyes? his length had nothing on your imagination. with a pretty pink mushroom tip, vein throbbing on the underside, heavy balls and a cute curve to the left, his dick undoubtedly had your mouth watering.

he’s twitching sans cease, as if it had a mind of its own.

“can’t believe you were holding out me, toru,” you lick your lips, laying flat on your own stomach, between his legs. he’s pushed up on his elbows, watching as you stroke his cock languidly. “you’re so mean.” your fists tightens at the top of his cock, thumb rubbing at his oozing slit, before loosening your hold as you lower to the base.

he gulps, hands scrunching at the duvets beneath him. you’re giving him these eyes, and your fleeting touches on his dick will surely have him lose his mind. “stop teasing meee, i’ll—nghh!” you kiss the tip of his cock,

and in the blink of an eye, he cums. your eyes shut as ropes of hot, white cum shoot at your face, from all different kinds of directions. he cums, and it’s a lot. it almost feels never ending, as does his cries. his back arches and his hips hump the air, cock twitching uncontrollably as it erupts.

“oh nooo— shit, ngh, fuck— can’t help it!” veins bulge in his forearm with how intensely he’s gripping onto the covers. you think it’s rather adorable, how easily overwhelmed he gets.

it takes a lifetime for his high to come down. and through it all, you’re pumping at his cock, milking him for what he has to offer. silently of course, you’re not even sure he’d be able to hear anything you have to say with how vocal he is.

when it all becomes too much, he starts shivering from oversensitivity, and his cock jumps weakly. you pull your hand away, and his dick falls onto his lower stomach. he’s breathing heavily, head thrown back as you clean the cum off your face. you pop a finger in your mouth, he tastes sweet. “hm.”

“just,” gojo pauses, taking another deep breath in. the ceiling must be real interesting for him. “just go on with it. but don’t say i didn’t tell you so.”

you smirk, now popping the finger out of your mouth with a wet plop! “you really weren’t kidding.”

hmm can anybody guess who the “mystery man” you hooked up with is ? 🌚

[savanir]

The What Corps?

“we have you now spook! there is nowhere you can run and hide with our new spectral tethers active!”

Danny winces at the small metal clips that have hooked themselves in his leg, some new GIW tech that is messing with his powers.

“oh yeah? I was just dying for you guys to give me a challenge” plan. plan. He's gotta think of a plan to get out of here and fast. He takes a steadying breath and starts to look for anything that can help him.

he can’t get caught here. He just can't. He simply won’t allow himself.

suddenly the two GIW goons in front of him click their earpieces to clearly listen to what someone else is telling them, Danny is very glad for his own enhanced senses.

“Operatives K and O, be advised, there have been sightings of a new ectoplasmic entity near your location. Other operatives report that it’s incredibly small and moves fast. watch your backs, this may be an ambush”

small and fast? it better not be some poor little blob ghost, Danny sort of hopes it’s some manner of ectowasp, at least that could be entertaining to see.

“you better not be hoping for back up, ecto scum”

“I have no idea what you are talking about”

It's then that a small bright green light zips on scene and weaves through crowds in the distance with ease and then speeds up towards the two operatives who do not hesitate to shoot, missing completely like the storm troopers they are.

Whatever it is, it is indeed going very fast but Danny manages to figure out what it looks like and it appears to be a… ring?

“hold it you tiny accessory shaped ecto fiend!”

The ring does a speedy circle around Operative O while K is lining up a shot and ends up blasting the poor guy point blank in his face, “O!”

Danny takes a step forward with an arm outstretched and a “oh damn! Are you alright?” on his lips when the ring takes the chance to slip on his finger. “Daniel Fenton of Earth”

Danny already had a freakout about a ghost jewelry getting on him, his experiences with those so far have been incredibly bad after all, what with the rings and crowns and pendants… now this damn thing is just straight up outing him! 

Thank the ancients the two GIW stooges are too busy with each other right now to pay close attention to what this weird ring is saying.

“You have the ability to overcome great fear” ah so this is related to him steeling himself just now? Maybe? or something??

You have been chosen” never good, we are back to freaking out again.

“Welcome to the green lantern corps” 

… the what?

Danny notices that his usual outfit suddenly has more green going on, and his DP symbol has some sort of… he guess it’s supposed to be a lantern, maybe? shape around it.

He’s somehow even more glowy now, and there is something on his face. Feeling its shape makes him think it’s some sort of mask.

The metal clip things are no longer attached to his legs though so that’s great!

“You’re not getting away so easily ecto scum! sentient ghost paraphernalia coming to your rescue or no!” They both aim their weapons to take a shot.

Danny figures he can now easily hold them back with his usual shields,“you guys realize you just called this weird ring sentient and thereby negate the whole nonsentie-ack!”

“Attacking a corps lantern is punishable offense as of the instatement of the galactic diplomatic immunity as declared by the-” Okay so now Danny is just raising his eyebrow at this weird as fuck ring. Just what is it going on about?

“notifying nearby lanterns and requesting assistance with apprehension of hostiles”

what?

“getting your friends to help you out vile spook? such a thing is useless with the Blackout still very much in place”

Well… the two streaks of green light in the distance is making Danny doubt that statement.

Maybe there is more to this Lantern corps thing than he thought… And something tells him his life is about to get even more complicated than it already is.

[alastorss]

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

Alastor's antlers are embarrassingly, pathetically, unbearably sensitive.

He can't for the life of him figure out why—it's not like any of the other transfigured creatures wandering around the underworld were made this way. Most other animal-like sinners don't seem to care about or even acknowledge their characteristics.

Yet here he is, purposefully hiding them away just so that no one will discover his terrible weakness. Oh, what he would give to be like the others if only to ignore their incessantly uncomfortable presence on his head.

Perhaps it was a curse from heaven that made him this way, or karma that he was repaying from his life. Either way, he can't stand being touched.

At least, that's what he thought.

There's no malicious intent behind your hands, no glint in your eye that makes the primal instincts in his head scream at him to melt into the shadows. You're as gentle as can be, fingers running delicately along the intricacies of his antlers and stopping just at the ends of them.

"They're beautiful," you whisper with your eyes blown wide. Your shoulders rise and fall with each rapid breath, probably from the adrenaline of standing so close to an Overlord like this. And Alastor, no less.

Your reliable hotelier. Your first real friend in the hotel. The one whose smile cannot be trusted.

But for some reason, you can't shake the feeling that he's looking at you with pure, genuine appreciation even if his smile is a little wonky.

"Why, thank you, darling!"

He jerks away from you quick as the wind, standing tall once again and towering over you. His expression has morphed into something more strained—you can tell by the way his face creases up as his eyes narrow.

He was the one who decided to invade your personal space while the two of you were arguing. He just didn't think that you would be so bold as to get distracted by his antlers and have the gall to reach out to touch them.

The worst part? The absolute worst part of it all is that no one in all the time he's been in Hell has been gentle with him like that.

Add that to the list of things he despises. Or likes. You're confusing him now.

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

You have some nerve, he thinks.

Your hands have found a new home resting atop his head, with your fingers combing through his hair and tracing up and down the curve of his antlers.

It becomes a nightly routine—him on the barstool or sitting in front of the piano and you standing behind him with your fingers tangled in his hair and your chin on his head, perched right between the horns. Others in the hotel have started to raise a brow, but you don't seem to care.

So when you finally decide to break routine, sitting on the opposite end of the couch from him, his eye twitches.

There isn't even an audience tonight, everyone else already tucked into bed save for Husk behind the bar who's too busy with a bottle to care. The silence between you is heavy as lead.

"Is something the matter?" Alastor finally abruptly asks, eyes narrowed at you from the side. You shift uncomfortably.

"Why would something be the matter?"

He's not in the mood for games right now. "This is the first time you've sat away from me in months," he observes.

You look at him, surprised by his hostility over this. "Well, Lucifer told me that you don't like—"

"Lucifer," he interrupts, head now whipping to the side so he can fully glare at you. "Knows nothing."

You blink at him, stunned. With the way he's acting, he almost seems... annoyed that you've decided to stop being so handsy?

Silence overcomes you again as you just stare at each other, completely at a loss of words. Alastor finally realizes his snappiness and composes himself once more, exhaling through his teeth.

His smile softens at you, missing its usual edge. You know him like this the best—head in your lap and antlers exposed. It's familiar to you in a way that it could never be to anyone else. At least, you hope that's true.

"He knows nothing," the radio demon says one more time for good measure, eyes drifting shut under the weight of your hands.

Alastor has never liked to be touched before. But maybe there is a first time for everything, and maybe the safety of your touch brings him enough ease that you're the first he admits he can tolerate.

His smile says it all. He's content like this, even if he would deny it with his chest if you ever told anyone else.

"Okay," you breathe. "I believe you."

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

things i am noticing make me Groan and immediately put in the 'i'll do that later' bin, which inevitably ends up killing my momentum in the other areas of a game i'm designing: adjusting scales/tables for 'alright we're going to want lower chances of getting this one.'

like when you're using this tool you're probably going to adjust the table so you're not getting 20-sentence prompts left and right at the same rate as 1-5, 6-10, etc prompts. most likely, and probably the quickest method (i'm aware of) for making things go smoothly in play, you're just going to assign fewer numbers on that scale/table that'll give you 20-sentence prompts. rolling 12 on a d12, for example, instead of 10-12.

the thing is that once you do this you're also going to have to adjust the other ranges on the table, and decide which options get a higher or lower chance. and on top of that, you might decide you want to introduce another outlier result that you can only get by rolling a 1. you're having to make some decisions here about the focus and rhythm of your game (or tool), and you have to get into the individual nitty-gritty of every number on the table at once, not just individually but in tandem with each other.

for some reason my brain Super Does Not Eyeball This Kind of Thing Well. it legit gives me a headache to think about while other mechanics are already fighting for Get It All Down Quick, Make It Work Coherently Before It Congeals into a Lump and You Forget It real estate. i know that's a sign of something to leave alone and then come back to work on later, but the uggghhhhh is so strong that it ends up just putting me off of even that.

i think at this point i might just deadass premake a bunch of tables for this kind of thing, with notes about what kind of vibe a particular balance of ranges will evoke, and then copypaste them in to mark with my usual 'not sure about this bit yet, come back to it later' notation and move on. in some cases it's a lot easier to do that instead of being taunted with a Blatantly Missing Hole in the Game while i'm trying to build around it.

[444lotus]

how i manifested (+revised) my dream body ౨ৎ

This is my first post on my new account, though I am NOT new to the law and NOT new to loablr either. This post is specifically about how I manifested my dream body instantly with no technique besides knowing :)

PART ONE - the old story

In the old story, I was so fixated on my body and my weight all of the time, I was tracking my calories and weighing myself and my food obsessively and constantly gaining and losing weight. Back then, my beliefs were that 1) Excess food causes weight gain, 2) If I don't track my food and weigh myself, I will become too fat/skinny, and 3) There is something wrong with my body, and I need to diet/exercise to fix it.

Noticing these beliefs were key to changing the way I viewed food and my body, and therefore changing how I knew food to effect me and how I knew my body to be.

When I was overweight, I knew my body was too big, I knew I was eating too much, I knew excess calories made me gain weight. When I was underweight, I knew I had no appetite, I knew I was too bony, I knew that exercise makes you gain muscle which is why I had none, etc. I had to identify the limiting beliefs that made me know my body was a certain way.

PART TWO - writing the new story

Once I identified the beliefs that were holding me back and kept me from my goals ("I know I eat too much, even if I affirm I'm skinny, I'm still going to gain weight."), I could then change them. I wrote down a list of these beliefs, like I did above, and came up with reversals. For example;

"I overeat, so I will gain weight" -> "Calories aren't even real, so I can eat whatever I want and stay the same weight."

"I eat junk food, so I'll never be skinny" -> "I love how fast my metabolism is, I can eat junk all day and still stay so skinny." or "Junk food is just like other foods. Raspberries can't make me fat so neither can hamburgers."

"I don't exercise enough to be toned" -> "It's crazy how I'm naturally so toned and fit without trying."

The key for me was changing key beliefs that kept me dieting and exercising to lose weight, to sever the tie between calories consumed and weight, and hours exercising and muscles. These are limiting beliefs. We literally create our reality. Not ice cream, not soda and chips, none of that can overcome YOU as a divine creator. It sounds silly when you spell it out like that, doesn't it?

PART THREE - how i did it

Okay, now we understand that the secret is to change the rules of our own reality to allow us to know a higher truth (my higher truth? I am a skinny legend). So how do we put this into practice?

All you have to do is know. You set these rules, so you know they are true, reality is bound to them. You must know you are successful, know that reality is in the 4d, and feel truly satisfied in that realm. You can do this using whatever method you need to, but personally, I just knew deep within me that I was my ideal weight, and that nothing could change that, that is simply the reality, that is simply the way things are. I thought about old pictures I took of myself, and remembered how skinny I looked in them, I thought about the last time I saw my friends and how much littler they said I'd gotten, I thought about the last time I stood on the scale and how it read the exact weight I knew myself to be. And I just knew, deep within me, that was simply how things were.

And the last step, for me, was to feel truly joyful at this realization. To feel satisfied it came into fruition. Without seeking confirmation, because I already KNEW.

And what do you know? Pictures of myself in my phone from weeks ago, they were my ideal body. The girl I saw in the mirror when I stood up from my meditation? She had my ideal body. My clothes? XS and S, all of them. I had revised my ideal body all the way back to the day I bought them. And confirmed this by checking pictures I took in the dressing room.

I'm telling you right now it is possible if you know in your heart you've always had your desire. It's always been fulfilled within you. You make the rules because you are a divine creator. Nothing outside of you can change what you know to be true.

That's all for now ౨ৎ

[chithereader]

jealousy, jealousy / aaron hotchner

here’s my masterlist! pairing: aaron hotchner x bau!reader / shy!reader word count: 2.4k genre & cw: fluff, a little jealousy and pining angst if u squint, mentions of made-up case, different use of cm character a/n: thank u so much for all the support i've been getting on my fics!! hope you love this one as much as i do, i really enjoyed writing this one the most!

Today was a bad day. That much was clear. From the moment you woke up to the minute you arrived at the BAU– you’re convinced that the universe has simply gone the extra mile to make your life a little harder. 

You slept through your alarm and a few phone calls from Garcia, making your morning stressful and complete chaos. You didn’t have time to grab a cup of coffee or a snack, and apparently you also didn’t have time to remove the colorful pimple patches that adorned your face. 

Your blouse is buttoned asymmetrically, your hair resembling a bird's nest, and you left your ID at home, making your arrival more delayed as you had to employ Garcia’s help in presenting a copy of your ID to let you through. 

That too was not without stress given that your phone was on the verge of dying as you were in the call, but thankfully you could finally breathe in the elevator. Or so you thought. 

There were two things that immediately caught you off guard as you walked into the bullpen: one, almost all the desks were deserted and two, Reid and Morgan were watching you- as if waiting for your reaction, which led you to look around in anticipation. Is there a surprise? A prank? Did I miss a patch? I’m…wearing pants, right? 

Not wanting to prolong your search, you look at the two for any indication or clue. Tilting your head to the side as if to ask what? But to your surprise, they both nod their heads in one direction. Oh.

Strauss was in Hotch’s office, along with Rossi and a woman you don’t recognize. Hotch looked a bit tense, Strauss firm, Rossi is as relaxed as ever, and the woman… is looking directly at Hotch. Just Hotch. Huh. 

You were stood just shy of your desk when you shook thoughts out of your head, slowly approaching your desk to settle your things. Dozens of scenarios were running through your head, trying to make sense of new additions to an otherwise normal day. 

But the way she was studying him made your chest tight like someone was stepping on it.. and you couldn’t figure out why. 

You approach the two rascals only to lean on Derek’s desk as you whisper under your breath, “What’s happening there?” 

Morgan shrugs but his focused face remains, “I don’t know, kid. I tried Garcia but she doesn’t have a clue either.” Eyes studying the people in the room, noting anything that could tell them something. 

Mulling over more possibilities, you hum in response. Turning to Reid, you ask him- hoping that his eidetic memory can tell you anything about the woman even if they’d only met in passing. 

“Do you know anything, Spence?” But Reid only pouts at you, a sign that he’s thought about it hard but is coming up empty. 

Shaking his head, he soberly replies, “No..I don’t think so. I– I’ve never seen her before. Sorry.” 

Before any more thoughts could be voiced between the three of you, the door to Hotch’s office opens and all four of them file out- the woman walking a little too close to Hotch. 

-

You’re approaching your usual seat on the jet beside Morgan and across from Hotch when suddenly Agent Seaver overtakes you and sits on your seat. Caught by surprise, your eyes instinctively go to Hotch who’s already looking at you. 

He nods to himself, moving from the aisle seat to the one by the window. But it appears Agent Seaver misunderstood his gesture and moved beside him, “Oh! Thank you, sir.” Even going as far as touching his arm and leaning closely. 

Now, you’ve never been a violent person. Rage has just never overcome your senses like that but today.. of all days– you couldn’t help the image of spilling your hot chocolate all over her cream blouse. 

You don’t even notice that you’re frowning as you sit beside Morgan, somehow still unaware of how much their closeness really upsets you. You honestly thought you’ve maintained an expressionless face until Morgan looks up from his file and leans close to whisper in your ear, “You’ll need claws not paws, baby girl.” Winking at you as you separate. 

You steal a glance at Hotch only to see him watching you and Morgan with furrowed brows. He almost looks normal if it weren’t for the clenching of his jaw that’s his tell of irritation. Moving your gaze to Seaver, in case you missed something that’s causing his new mood, you find her reading the case file. 

As you return your gaze on Hotch, you watch as Seaver touches his arm again and engages him in conversation about the case. It’s through the whole jet ride that you had to stomach the constant Agent Hotchner, Agent Hotchner! paired with a giggle or a slight touch. UGH!

If it weren’t for Strauss personally recommending Agent Seaver as a consultant for this case, you would have done– …still absolutely nothing. You had no claim whatsoever over Hotch. Morgan and Rossi may tease the two of you occasionally, forcing that he treats you specially or whatever but his behavior could simply be chalked off as him being a good and attentive boss. 

And yes, okay fine. You may have some moments here and there… but! they could honestly just be built up in your head because of the feelings you have for him. Like when he said he likes it when you stare? Come on, being stared at can be flattering and that’s just a universal truth. 

- 

After a whole day of coming up with theories, visiting crime scenes and M.E.’s, you’re all completely spent. Lounging in the makeshift discussion room, all of you are still working tirelessly on the case given that the unsub’s on a spree and his timeline is alarmingly short. 

Reid’s been silently staring at the board for 20 minutes while Morgan’s pretending to read files of potential suspects with his legs stretched out and feet on the table, “This is impossible. We just don’t have enough.” He exclaims as he tosses the file on the table with a thud. 

To the left of Morgan, you’re also silently mulling over files of potential suspects. Not wanting to admit that he’s right, you guys don’t have enough…bodies. You barely have anything on the guy, barely any clues- for a working profile. 

You sigh heavily, peeling your eyes off the paper and looking at the board. “Reid?” The boy genius shakes his head softly, confirming that the known dump sites don’t say much about the unsub’s comfort zones or hunting ground. 

You suddenly wonder where Seaver, Hotch and Rossi are. You and Morgan got back to the precinct at around 11PM, and you realize you haven’t seen any of them, “Where are the others?” 

Morgan, in an effort to lighten the mood, jumps at the chance to tease you, “Hmm. I think what you’re really asking is: Where’s Hotch and is he with Seaver?” He punches your arm lightly, making it obvious he’s only teasing. 

The smug, playful smile on his face makes you fight one of your own, desperately trying to not give yourself away, “Shut up,” hitting him in the head softly with the file in your hand. 

While you two were exchanging playful glares, Reid interjects, “Seaver wanted to turn in early since she’s also the one meeting with the families tomorrow so Hotch brought her to the hotel.” 

You instantly lift your gaze to him and watch as he removes the marker’s cap and scribbles rapidly on the board, quickly adding “And I’m pretty sure Rossi’s getting us coffee from the diner around the block.” 

You want to blame it on your exhaustion– your inability and ineffectiveness at hiding how you truly feel about what Reid just revealed to you, groaning loudly in pain and frustration. You put your head in your hands, muffling the sounds you’re making that are somehow a combination of a laugh and a sob. 

Morgan understands your reaction immediately and laughs out loud. 

“It’s not funny!” There was honestly no point in hiding it. As much as Morgan teased you, you knew he wouldn’t tell anyway, and Reid.. well, he was honestly an even better keeper of secrets than Morgan, Rossi and Garcia. 

He puts a hand on your shoulder to comfort you, “Baby girl, worry not. You know you hold a special place in boss man’s heart.” Then gripping both your wrists to pry your hands off your face. 

Pressing your face even further into your hands, you let out a muffled version of “That’s not true!” that came out more as “Daffs noft thwu!” 

When Morgan successfully pries your hands off your face, you’re surprised to see Reid’s moved from the board to behind Morgan, half leaning half sitting on the table, curiously watching you. 

Morgan turns around to look at the door behind you, making sure the coast is clear before he says, “Kid. Be real with me for a sec… are you blind?” That was not the question you were expecting. 

You must have looked so lost because he continues, “Hotch cares for you. Deeply. And not in the same way he does for us. You’ve gotta have felt that, kid.” Funny, you are starting to feel like a kid– the only thing missing are his hands on your shoulders to complete that huddle pep talk experience. 

“That’s just not–” you try to start. But Reid swiftly raises his hand, signing you to stop–

“Did you know that every morning Hotch makes sure all the pens and mug handles on your desk are pointing to the right– the way you need it to be– in case the night janitors move any out of place?”

“Or that he never really ate lunch in the office before but started bringing sandwiches and other food he could microwave, while timing his lunches with yours presumably so he could strike up a conversation with you during break?” 

“Or do you remember that one time the AC in the bullpen broke and we were all sweating badly, and I said the heat was making me too thirsty then he disappeared into his office and came back with a bottle of water and an orange juice box only to give it to you?” 

Morgan lets out a loud laugh at that one while Reid pouts playfully, “I mean I was genuinely dying then.” 

Not without his own input, Morgan smiles softly at you with a raised brow “Did you know he personally restocks your favorite hot chocolate in the pantry and on the jet? Including the marshmallows.” 

You breathe in deeply, the revelations sounding too good to be true but winding nonetheless. You crack a small joke, trying to play it off “And I thought the bureau was just feeling really generous.” 

The two, who have grown to be such brothers, give you the exact same look of Really? 

As Reid rounds the table to go back and stand by the board, Morgan catches your attention and holds your eye, “Look, there’s so much more, kid. But they all point to the same thing.” He says this as softly as possible, as if to not scare you away. 

You let out a soft, breathy laugh. Shaking your head, “That just can’t be true.” 

With all three of your backs to the door, you don’t notice Rossi nearing. You just suddenly hear his voice from behind, rounding the table and settling the coffee cups in front of all of you, “Coffee, anyone?” 

As if trapped in the null of the previous conversation, you’re still looking at Morgan as you lean back in your chair, slumping further to seek non-existent cover. Reid, who is now back in his own world with the board, is handed a cup by Rossi, who didn’t even turn to look- only stretching out an arm to receive it and mumbling a distracted “Thanks.”  

Rossi, who is simply too smart for his own good, impressively senses something hanging in the air, nonchalantly asking about the tailend of a conversation he was not supposed to hear, “So… what can’t be true?” 

Back to lounging excessively on a chair that is a tad too tiny for him, with legs outstretched and feet on the corner on the table– Morgan spouts, “That she’s Hotch’s girl, and has no reason to be jealous of Seaver– who by the way needs the HR orientation more than Penelope and I.” 

-

Now– all of your backs are to the door except Rossi’s. Not one of you tried to move due to fatigue, let alone look.

Unbeknownst to you, Morgan, and Reid, on the way back to the precinct from the hotel, Hotch had the genius thought of picking up Rossi so the latter wouldn’t have to walk a block with trays of coffee on hand.

Hotch and Rossi arrived together. And as Rossi went around the table to give you your cups of coffee, Hotch stayed behind– leaning on the doorframe with arms crossed, watching you and the team.

Imagine his surprise, hearing what Morgan just said. His heart skipped a beat, his stomach dropped. His entire being froze entirely.. What? Jealous? 

In his mind, he had two choices: Act like he didn’t hear it and save you from embarrassment or use it to his advantage and make his intentions clear..ish. 

-

You gasp loudly at his bluntness– and in front of Rossi! Straightening in your chair and pointing an accusatory finger at Morgan, “You little– I am NOT jealous! and I am NOT Hotch’s–” 

Cut off by someone loudly clearing their throat from behind all of you, you all freeze, including Reid who hasn’t been actively paying attention until now. 

The hair on your neck stands up as you hear the nearing footsteps, already envisioning digging your own grave in your head when finally, Hotch is standing right beside you. 

You’re all still pretty frozen, save from the slow movement which is your eyes slowly lifting its gaze to the man in question until they meet his hazel orbs. He holds your stare as he leans on the desk, arms straining in his shirt– 

Out of the corner of your eye you can see Rossi fighting a smile, and just as you’re about to mentally curse him in your head, you’re broken out of your thoughts by a deep voice, 

“You don’t think you’re my girl?”