#to do pitiful amounts of shit as they then killed him at their leisure

[thingswhatareawesome]

THERE SHOULD NOT BE A FUCKING ENEMY THAT CROWD CONTROLS YOUR ENTIRE FUCKING TEAM. THAT IS MASSIVE FUCKING BULLSHIT STAR RAIL. ABSOLUTE FUCKING BULLSHIT.

I FUCKING HATE SIM UNIVERSE SO FUCKING GODDAMNED MUCH. YOU SHOULD NOT GET AN ENTIRE GROUP CROWD CONTROLLED AND BE LEFT FUCKING HELPLESS TO DO ANYTHING AS THEY KO HALF YOUR PARTY. I'VE EVEN CLEARED THAT WORLD AND NO I DON'T NEED PATH PRES OR ABUNDANCE TO DO IT. THAT'S JUST FUCKING CHEAT CODE BULLSHIT. JFC.

STAR RAIL YOU CAN FUCKING GO TO FUCKING HELL. TOTAL PARTY CROWD CONTROL IS FUCKING COMPUTER CHEAT SHIT.

[vincent-frankenstein]

41: “You did all of this for me?” With Moceit plz?

Summary: Deceit loves getting sick. He loves having to lock himself away in his room to protect his reputation, to protect himself from being coddled. He can’t let the others see him in such a state. But then they find out, and Patton won’t let him ride it out alone. 

Warnings: sickness, weakness, Banter and teasing, sympathetic deceit

Pairing: moceit with like, background familial dlamp 

@figurative-siren-song uwu

Deceit just loved being sick.

Really, it was such fun! It involved all of his favoritepastimes — such as being unable to leave his bed for days on end, and coughingup a lung every time he tried to speak, and sneezing his goddamn brains out every five minutes. He could think of no grander way tospend his time lying curled up in bed, trying to force his stomach to staywhere it belonged.

And the added bonus of being completely and utterly trapped? Well, that wasjust the cherry-on-top.

Obviously, he could let the others see him like this. Such glaringsigns of weakness would never be used to his disadvantage! Why, they'dprobably drop everything to care for him, to nurse him back to health like the"family" they claimed to be!

Not.

He sneered, glaring balefully at the cup of tea on his desk. It hadlong since gone cold, but he couldn't risk going out to get a new one. It wastimes like this where he almost wished things could go back to how they used to be;at least then he'd have access to the old kitchen, the one in the Others' partof the mindscape, where he knew he wouldn't be seen. There could be any numberof sides waiting for him in their newer, grayer commons, and the thought ofanyone seeing him in such a state made his stomach churn.

Besides, he doubted he'd survive such an encounter. With how his head ached,one boisterous laugh from Roman or offended screech from Logan would be enoughto kill him. He wasn't too keen on the idea of dying. Surpringing, Iknow, from the embodiment of self-preservation.

But he was hardly needy. He could handle a few days on his own. He greetedhis solitude with open arms, and —

Oh no.

He barely had a moment to hiss a panicked curse before the bed dropped outfrom under him and he was tugged down-sideways-up until the living room floorrose up to meet his feet. He staggered, pressing his hand over his mouth andstumbling into the banister.

"Deceit?" Oh. Good, good, good. That was Patton's voice.He could hear Logan shifting beside him. He was in the commons, how fun! Definitely not a terrifying prospect. "Are you okay,kiddo?"

He shifted against the stairs until he was leaning nonchalantly, and crossedhis arms, lifting an eyebrow. "Of course not," he said, digging hisfingernails into his arm to keep from coughing. He was met with four confused,disbelieving stares.

"I've got a more important question," Roman declared. "Arethose Scooby-Doo pajamas?"

Deceit's nose twitched with annoyance. "...No."

"They totally are!" Roman's laughter was like tiny explosionsagainst Deceit's aching eardrums. It took everything in him to not wince.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize I wasn't allowed to have leisure clothes,"Deceit snapped. "You have oh-so-much room to judge, Roman, in thatsale-rack Halloween costume of yours."

If Roman's laughter was tiny explosions, his offended squawking was likeshoving a bazooka into Deceit's ear and firing. "'Sale-rack Halloween costume?'"he repeated, one hand clutched against his chest. "How dare you?!Do you have any idea how much effort I put into this outfit?! Weeksspent planning and sewing —"

"Falsehood," Logan cut in, raising an eyebrow. "You told meyourself you simply conjured it up on a whim."

"Wh — but — okay, but, the emotional effort —"

"Now, now, kiddos, let's not fight, okay?" Patton said, holding uphis hands placatingly. "Roman, your outfit is lovely. And Dee, yourpajamas are super cute!"

Deceit blinked. "...Thanks," he said drily, to which Pattonbeamed, completely genuine. "Alright, can we get to whatever dilemma youneed my help with? I wasn't in the middle of something."

"Oh, yeah, I'm sure your midday nap is way more important thanhelping Thomas," Virgil said with a roll of his eyes. Deceit opened hismouth to retort, but Logan lifted a hand.

"Enough," he said evenly. "Deceit, I assume you're aware ofthe surprise party that Thomas plans to throw for Joan's birthday nextweek?"

"What? No!" Deceit placed a hand against his chest,feigning surprise. "Why would I know about that? It's not like I suggestedit!"

Logan continued as if he hadn't spoken. "Thomas is about to spend aprolonged amount of time with Joan to brainstorm ideas for the channel. We needyou to, ah —"

"Keep his mouth shut," Deceit finished, and Logan nodded."Well, as fun as that sounds, I do believe I'll have to pass."

"What? Why?"

Because his legs had begun to shake, and he doubted he could stay uprightfor much longer. Because his throat ached and twinged with every word out ofhis mouth. Because his head pounded, black spots dancing in front of his eyes,and he just wanted to sleep, goddamnit.

"I have some personal business to attend to," he said simply.

Virgil huffed. "'Personal business?'" he repeated, raising aneyebrow.

"Yes. I'm afraid I must nunya," Deceit said.

Patton's eyebrows furrowed. "What's 'nunya?'"

"Nunya business," Deceit said. He shoved away from the banisterand drew himself to his full height. "Roman is more than capable of comingup with excuses for our dear boy Thomas. Now, if you'll excuse me —"

"Hold on, you expect me to do your job for you? After you insulted myprecious outfit! Ha! Fat chance, Lyin' King!" Roman declared,setting his hands on his hips.

"Technically, you insulted his outfit first," Logan said. He dugaround in his pocket for a moment, drawing out an index card. "'Nocap.'"

"Well, yeah, of course there's no cap!" Patton said, a smilegrowing on his face. "Dee's not wearin' his hat!"

Logan's groan was like stepping on a landmine. Deceit couldn't help butwince, pain wracking through his skull, pressure building inside his forehead.Black spots danced before his eyes. When the world slotted back into placearound him he found every eye in the room on him, and he shifted beneath thesearchlights, eyes narrowing.

"You don't look very okay, kiddo," Patton said, with concern inhis eyes. Deceit's nose twitched.

"I assure you, I am fine —"

"Yeah, bullshit," Virgil said. "You look like shit. Well,shittier than usual."

"How kind of you to say, Virgil," Deceit said, with a roll of hiseyes. "I must say, you're looking quite shitty yourself, as usual."

Virgil hissed — and Deceit made the ultimate mistake of hissing back. Thecoughing fit that followed had him wheezing for breath, tears building in hiseyes, and when it finally subsided he was met with the worst punishment of all:pity.

"Oh, honey... you're sick," Patton said softly.

"Well, now the pajamas make sense!" Roman said, nodding tohimself, as if that was the most important aspect of their conversation. Deceittook a step back, eyes narrowing.

"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not," he said, voice ragged. "It definitelymatters."

"Yes, it does," Logan said. "As metaphysical beings, we areincapable of dying, but that doesn't mean we can't get sick. Any illnesses wedo manage to catch should be treated properly, lest they become worse."

"Gee, sure wish I'd thought of that!" Deceit said, in ahigh-pitched tone that made his throat ache. "Oh, wait, I did. I wasresting before you all decided to drag me out here!"

Logan blinked. "'My bad,'" he said awkwardly, pulling out a vocabcard.

"Yeah, if I had known you were sick, I never would have made fun ofyou," Roman said, and to his credit, he did look genuinely apologetic."Your pajamas are quite becoming."

Deceit yanked his shirt into place and rolled his eyes. "Thank you,Roman," he said, only half sarcastic. At Roman's pressing stare, hesighed. "Your outfit is ridiculously ugly as well."

"Hey! Oh — wait, thanks!"

"Now am I allowed to go rest?"

"Of course." Logan straightened his tie and nodded. "Myapologies for dragging you into this, Deceit."

"I don't accept your apology." Finally he was free to sinkdown, and he did so with great relief, collapsing onto his bed with anexhausted sigh. He squeezed his eyes tightly shut and pretended like the roomwasn't rocking around him.

And that's how he spent the five hours that followed: curled up atop hisbed, shivering and miserable. He considered it a worthy use of his time. Whatelse could he have been doing? Something productive? Unrealistic.

When the knocking first began, he had sunk so deeply into the throes ofexhaustion that he brushed them off as hallucinations. But then came a voice,muffled through the door: "Dee?"

Ah. Patton. Far be it from him to let Deceit simply rest. He lifted himselfas well as he could, wobbling dangerously, and hissed out a vague response.

"Okay, well, there's no need to be like that," Patton said."I've got somethin' for ya downstairs, if you feel down to seein'it!"

"I definitely need some inane movie night right now,"Deceit hissed, words lisping and slurring. His room had grown quite cold, buthe hardly had the strength to turn on the heat. "I'm doing just fine in here,thanks."

"Dee, I know you," Patton said. "You're probably hidin' inthere with the heat off, wallowin' in your own self-pity."

"... No I'm not."

Patton sighed. "Take it from me, hun," he said. "That's notgonna make anything better. You can't hide from your sickness and jus' hope itgoes away."

Deceit groaned. "I can damn well try!"

"No. No, you can't," Patton said. "I promise, it's not amovie night. Or, well — not technically. Would you just come down?"

"I'm afraid this illness is terminal, Patton," Deceit said."They've already had to amputate both my legs. I can't walk."

"Oh, poor baby," Patton cooed — and then he gently pushed open thedoor and stepped inside. He rubbed away the goosebumps on his arms, shivering."Oh, honey, it's like a freezer box in here! And you're not even under anyblankets!"

"I like the cold," Deceit insisted, stubborn as ever. Hesniffled, burrowing into his pillow so he didn't have to look at Patton'ssympathetic frown. "Leave me to die, Morality. It's far too late forme."

"Not if I have anything to say about it!" Patton rolled up hissleeves and — hefted Deceit into his arms, and oh, oh wow, he was reallystrong — and he nestled Deceit against his chest and carried him out of theroom.

Deceit hadn't the energy to struggle, but even if he did, he doubted hewould have. Patton's touch was burning fire against his skin and he melted intoit, eyes slipping shut. He hadn't realized how cold he'd truly become until thewarmth drove the ice from his bones, bringing feeling back to his fingers andtoes.

The living room had been thrown to chaos — the couches pushed aside, theircushions torn from their seats to become building blocks for the grandestblanket fort Deceit had ever seen. Patton set him down in the center and stood,brushing off his hands.

"Wh... what is this?" Deceit asked, eyes narrowing. The jolt ofwarmth had brought clarity back to his mind, and with it came that familiar,sharp suspicion. The living room was dark, the lights dimmed to a comfortableglow — and the Netflix startup screen shone on the tv. None of the others werein sight.

"Well," Patton said, lowering himself down to the edge of the fortto sit. "Virge told us about your tendency to hide away wheneveryou're feelin' less-than-okay."

Ah. A betrayal, then. He knew there was something shady behind this.

"And, well, I know the feeling..." Patton twisted his handstogether in his lap, rubbing the pad of his thumb over the back of his otherhand. "So I figured, if you gotta feel miserable, you might as well do itcomfortably!"

Deceit raised an eyebrow, and Patton stood. "You've got full access toNetflix, and there's a couple different heatin' pads in there. I'm cookin' upsome chicken noodle soup for ya, and then I'll get outta your hair. We'll all stayclear of the commons for ya."

Deceit blinked. He glanced around the fort, this time with wide-eyedconfusion rather than suspicion. "And you did all of this... for me?"

"Well, yeah!" Patton said, as if it made all the sense in theworld. "I care about you, hun. We all do."

...Huh. For the first time in his life, Deceit was stricken speechless, notby fury, but by care. He looked down to his lap, and then back up atPatton, and forced bitter truth to coat his words. "Thank you," hesaid, more genuine than he'd ever allow himself to be otherwise.

"'Course!" Patton beamed. "Alrighty, I'm gonna go finish up that soupfor ya! Then I'll stop botherin' you —"

"You're not," Deceit said before he could stop himself. Pattontilted his head to the side; the sight was undeniably adorable.

"Not what?"

"... Bothering me," Deceit finished lamely. "You don't haveto... leave. If you don't want to."

Patton's lips parted in a little 'o' of surprise — and then he smiled, andit looked like the sunrise. Deceit leaned closer to the heating pad at his sideand pretended that that was the reason for the flames blazing across his face."Are you sure?"

"I mean, it's not like I care either way," Deceit said. Brusquely,he snatched the remote from its pillow-throne and began clicking throughNetflix. His eyes narrowed. "As long as you don't get too close. I wouldn'tfeel terrible if you got sick."

Patton made a little squeak, almost inhuman in how touched and excited itwas, and he nodded, hair flopping down in his face. "Soup for two it is,then!" he said, and bounced off into the kitchen.

An hour later, Deceit fell asleep against Patton's chest.

A few days later, Patton got sick.

Deceit built him a blanket fort.

[thejakeformerlyknownasprince]

Disability and Loren

@zarohk asked for my thoughts on a Disability Studies/Media Studies perspective on the disability depictions in Animorphs.  Which was foolish, because I’m teaching an entire dang class on the subject of superheroes and mental health, so I have Many Thoughts.  [PLEASE NOTE: I am nondisabled, so if I err, please tell me so.]

Loren’s role in #49: The Diversion does a lot of things right, and a lot of things wrong.  She incurs a traumatic brain injury that results in memory loss and blindness a couple of years after Tobias is born, and lives with said injury for about ten years before Tobias finds her and gives her the ability to morph, which restores her sight but not her memory.

A few places where I commend the depiction of Loren:

It gets into the massive underemployment of disabled Americans.  Loren is smart, canny, athletic, compassionate... and working a call center job in exchange for state benefits.  Said state benefits do not afford her a decent standard of living; Tobias notes that she has few possessions and almost no time for leisure activities.  Americans with disabilities are twice as likely to be unemployed as those without, and those who do have jobs are ten times more likely to be paid less than minimum wage, e.g. in sheltered workshops.

It shows how inaccessible a lot of systems are in the U.S.  Tobias notes that Loren accidentally grabs an expired quart of milk — because nothing on the label is printed in Braille.  Putting raised text and/or Braille on food packaging is a health and safety issue, one that the U.S. ignores even though it violates its own laws (e.g. the ADA) because companies tend to do what they want and “what they want” is usually not to spend more money on packaging.  The call center and bus system are both marginally more accessible, especially when Loren has Champ to help, but they’re still clearly spaces set up for sighted people that don’t take blind users into account very well.

It shows some of the workarounds that help deal with accessibility problems.  Loren’s house is set up so that there are clear paths to and from all of the relevant spaces.  She’s doing that to allow herself to move around comfortably in that space, because she’s made it accessible for herself.  She memorizes the layout of the local store, and uses that to get around as well.  All of those details help show that she’s adjusted, and actively interacting with her own circumstances.

It drives home the difference between service dogs and pets.  This distinction is extremely important, and it gets ignored all the time by entitled ableists who want to bring their pets into stores.  Tobias and Marco both assume from the outside that it can’t be that hard to become a service animal — just do what Loren says to do, right? — but it takes Tobias 0.02 seconds to realize that it’s not that simple and that he cannot imitate Champ’s lifetime of training on the fly.  He says that he manages to get his mom home in one piece, and that that’s about all that can be said for his sad performance as a guide.  Champ has skills like ignoring interesting smells and applying exactly the right amount of pressure to the harness that most pets don’t have and also most pets can’t learn.  Champ is not a pet, at least not while he’s in that harness; he’s a gainfully employed expert assistant.

It rounds Loren out as a character, and definitely does not just make her into a lesson or problem for Tobias.  Loren is gently humorous, tolerating her coworkers’ teasing and Ax’s attempted juvenile delinquency with an eye-roll.  She’s compassionate, listening to other people’s problems on the phone with genuine concern and not swatting flies if she doesn’t have to.  She’s tough-minded and stupidly brave, chucking rocks at Visser Three’s head and flying at attack helicopters as a three-pound bird.  She’s fallible, unable to support Tobias emotionally even when he asks her to do so and unwilling to check in on him after leaving him with her sister.  She’s a fully rounded person, one whose personality is informed but not defined by her disability.

It talks about some of the unromatic aspects of a Traumatic Brain Injury.  Too often in other works of fiction, we see a person get bonked over the head and wake up with no episodic memory but all other brain functions intact (*cough* Rachel in MM1 *cough*).  Loren actually gets into the fact that she forgot huge chunks of language, forgot how to brush her teeth, forgot how to walk across a room.  She obviously lost her sight as well, and she mentions lifelong balance and coordination problems.  Even her amnesia isn’t absolute — she has some traces of recall, but can’t make anything coherent of her impressions.  Her injury isn’t 100% realistic, but it’s more so than many TBIs we see in fiction.

It focuses on the intersection of disability and social class.  Tobias notes that Loren is under a compounded threat because of her inability to move to a more secure neighborhood and her obvious vulnerability.  He feels a lot of disgust with himself when he and Marco and Ax are harassing Loren, because it’s so clear that this isn’t the first time she’s been harassed.  Tobias understands that his experience with poverty as a nondisabled male minor is different from Loren’s for those reasons.

A few places where Loren falls into the common traps of implied ableism creeping into fiction, as written about in Narrative Prosthesis: 

She gets “cured.”  Loren falls into the “kill or cure” dichotomy, like most of the other disabled characters in Animorphs.  In her case, it’s that she gains the power to morph and in the process regains the ability to see.  It isn’t a complete cure, true — she still has no memory — but it means that she’s no longer blind for the rest of the series.  Having the occasional character no longer be disabled sometimes isn’t automatically problematic; having every disabled character get either “fixed” or killed off inherently treats the disabled body as a problem that needs to be solved, through sci fi nonsense if no other way is available.

She implies that she’d rather die than continue to be disabled.  When injured by dracon burns, Loren initially refuses to morph out even though Tobias tells her she’ll die if she remains a bird, because (they both assume) to morph out is to return to her blind human body.  This moment buys into the stereotype that it’s better to be dead than disabled, again inherently devaluing the lives of actual blind individuals.

There’s a certain amount of mystery around how she became disabled.  It’s interesting that we never actually get a definitive answer on that one — Loren says she was told it was a car crash, but there’s also an implication that she was attacked by controllers, and we don’t know for sure.  However, the fact of her disability is treated as an aberrant state that needs to be explained, the book inherently asking “why are you like this?”  By contrast (for instance) she doesn’t ask Tobias “why are you in the body of a hawk?”

She views herself as a burden, and the narration doesn’t do enough to contradict her.  Loren says that she couldn’t possibly be expected to raise a child while also blind and coping with a TBI.  Real blind people raise kids all the time, however, including blind single parents, and it’d be nice to see some evidence in the story that Loren’s assumption is wrong.  Loren also apparently assumes that she can’t begin to play a role in Tobias’s life even now that Tobias is more self-sufficient, again because she views herself as relatively helpless and non-contributing due to her disability.  There are some hints that she’s wrong, but we don’t really see her either begin to contribute to the resistance or build a relationship with Tobias until after she’s become un-blind.

Tobias’s view of Loren is often pitying.  As much as Loren doesn’t initially view herself as a potential maternal figure to Tobias, he doesn’t view her as a potential mentor either.  He repeatedly expresses horror or sadness at her life circumstances, and assumes that her life must be barren due to the spartan nature of her home.  (Of course, that begs the question of why the hell a blind woman living alone would ever bother hanging pictures on her walls or putting doilies on her coffee tables, but Tobias doesn’t consider that angle.)  Again, Tobias is allowed to assume that her life must be meaningless if she’s disabled, but it’d be nice to see some contradictory evidence in the form of her having close friends or inane hobbies or some other proof that to lead a disabled life is not to automatically lead a lonely one.

Loren expresses bitterness and desperate desire to be nondisabled.  Again, it’s fine for any character to say “I wish my life was different,” and it’s a common consensus among blind writers/bloggers that being blind is often a pain in the butt.  However, views as extreme as “you need vision to have a fulfilling existence” or “vision is part of what makes us human” are ableist crocks of shit.  Loren doesn’t go so far as to espouse those extreme views, but she also doesn’t seem to view herself as having a well-rounded life in spite of her disability.  It’d be nice to see Loren talking about sight as handy or enjoyable or a thing that the designers of 99% U.S. environments assume everyone must have, rather than a necessary precondition for a minimum standard of life.

Loren’s disability is somewhat medicalized.  Same caveat as above: disabilities are by definition medical things that some bodies do or have that other bodies do not.  However, discussing disability primarily through “this is how your body is different from Implied Normal of Nondisabled Body” and focusing on doctor’s notes, diagnoses, physical differences, etc. can serve to disconnect the lived experience of the individual from their body.  It also tends to focus on the ways that the body is “the problem” rather than focusing on the ways that environments and attitudes are problematic, which then prevents anyone from asking hard questions about the environments and attitudes.  Loren’s doctor’s note, discussion of scarring and loss, and repeated physical descriptions are somewhat more medical than social.  It’d be nice to see a little more emphasis on the social factors that make blindness a disability (e.g. improperly labeled milk), and less on “your eyes are different from those of Implied Normal Nondisabled Person.”

[maiverypt]

Inopinatus

Nostalgia [1]

inopinatus, inopinata, inopinatum

adjective

Definitions:

unexpected, unforeseen, surprising

~~~¤~~~¤~~~¤~~~¤~~~¤~~~¤~~~¤~~~¤~~~¤

Hyerin groaned as she looked up at the clock that was hung on the middle of the room, "10:54pm".  She had 6 more minutes before the end of her shift, wanting nothing more to just go home and lay in her comfy, reposeful bed.

The day started off as shit and ended somehow more crap than usual. She had overslept as she forgot to set her alarm prior, resulting in her arriving to her morning lecture late-Which earned her a good 10 minute scolding from her professor, she then proceeded to fall asleep in pysch and miss all of the info that would be on their next test and to top it all off, she had to sit next to Johnny Seo for economics. The boy kept bothering her for equipment while seemingly not paying attention to the lesson. He even had the audacity to ask to borrow her notes.  Hyerin scoffed at the mere thought of him.

' Stupid Johnny Seo'

She focused on the current task that she was occupying, trying to fill the amazingly large frapucccino with great amounts of diabetes and syrups. She had managed to land a job near her apartment complex, which was convenient as it was also close to her uni.

The café was small but cozy, having a few but regular customers who came in at their preferred times. It wasn't her ideal part time job, however she did manage to achieve the minimum wage and the regulars presented her and other co workers with warm and gratifying greetings. It was enough for her.

Handing the customer the now ready drink, she began to walk to the till, placing the money inside it,hoping no one else would come in through the door. Oh how she desperately wanted to go home and relax. This was not how she wanted to spend her Friday night.

Seeming as if fate heard her and ignored her wishes, the chimes rang- signalling the arrival of a new customer. A group of boys had entered the shop, managing to create an incredible amount of noise, which turned the heads of customers inside the venue. Hyerin sighed as she plastered on a fake smile.

'Why do you have to come in right before the end of my shift?' She grimaced.

One of the boys arrived at the till, skimming through the different drinks and refreshments.He was quite tall and muscular as he leaned on the counter, paying no attention to the cashier in front of him. Hyerin's  eyes travelled up at the person before her , her orbs lingering on his defined features. Johnny Seo. She mentally whined in distate and pushed her cap down as she hoped he wouldn't recognise  her.

' Fuck my life' she thought, her eyes remaining on the till below her.

He was concentrated on the menu above her, eyes skimming up and down before finally turning to her and asking.

"What do you recommend?" His focus never leaving the ornament from above as he impatiently tapped his slender fingers against the counter top.

Hyerin mentally thanked the Gods that he wasn't looking at her, then clearing her voice before replying, trying to disguise herself by lowering it by an octave. 

"Uhh I would suggest the Nitro cold brew or the Green tea crème Frappuccino, they are the best sellers and they are also cheap." She cringed at the awkwardness in her voice, nevertheless continuing to smile at the boy.

'Please hurry up, please hurry up, please hurr-'

Her thoughts were interrupted as the tall boy in front of her began speaking.

"Holy shit Hyerin? What are you doing here?"The tall, lean boy leaned on the counter, his brown eyes piercing . His voice sounding questioning and curious. Staring intently at her as if he was desperately trying to identify her.

'Fuck'

Continuing to smile at him, she asked again.

"Sorry, I think you have the wrong person, what would you like to order?"

Her hands began fiddling with the counter top and she broke into a cold sweat. The boy sustained a confused complexion before replying.

"Oh sorry."

He awkwardly scratched the back of his neck before looking at her once more. 'I swear that's Hyerin though.'

"I'll get 2 vanilla lattes, a java chip frappuccino, a cinnamon roll frappuccino, 2 hot chocolates, a chai latte , a Nitro cold brew and a Green tea crème Frappuccino please."

'Jesus that's nine drinks'  She wondered if she'll ever go home at this point.

Sighing in relief , Hyerin calculated the total before asking him for the money and his name to write on the cups.  She was lucky that only he was dumb enough to believe her. Writing the orders down, she passed the paper to Minhee (her aquantince who happened to work in the same place). Earning a glare out of the girl, grumbling something about how she would kill Hyerin later.

Johnny walked back to the other boys, who luckily managed to grab a seat large enough for all nine of them. His face still remaining with a quizzical look as he sat down.

"Johnny, are you okay dude? You look spaced out " Taeyong looked at the taller male adjacent to him  in concern. His worried gaze centralised on his unusual etiquette.

"Yeah, but I think I just saw Hyerin. I think she works here." He replied, completely lost in thought.

Turning his head at the name, Taeil looked at the boy. "Hyerin? As in Hwang Hyerin? That girl who always proclaims her hate for you?" His voice coated with disbelief.

"Why would she work here? I mean she isn't the type to be  a barista, are you sure it's her?"

Slowly but surely, Johnny nodded at the elder's exclamation. He was 100% certain that he saw Hyerin. He didn't understand why or when she started hating him, but in all honesty it broke him.

Taeyong and Taeil looked at the boy in pity, understanding his dejected mood. Taeyong had carefully patted his back in empathy.

"Don't worry, I'm sure she'll come around to her senses, it's only been about-"

"3 years, Taeyong, 3 goddamn years."

Johnny had interrupted the younger male, brushing his hair up in irritance . It wasn't the same, he tried to act as if he was alright, always provoking her to cover up that he wasn't at all affected by what happened. But  he was fucking depressed. He missed his best friend. He missed her.

•

•

"Minhee, are you done with their orders yet?" Hyerin asked the petite and short girl that was huffing in pure annoyance.

"Yes, all I need to do is add the fucking cream on top " She retorted in anger as she slammed the drink on the counter.

Rolling her eyes, Hyerin grabbed the drinks and set it on the tray. "Johnny Seo! Your drinks are ready!" Her voice echoed inside the small venue, which caused the group of boys to look at her.

Almost immediately, Taeyong had gotten up, walking over to the counter, to see if it really was Hyerin. After all, only he and Taeil knew Johnny's true feelings about her. Taking a glance at the girl, he leisurely grabbed the tray and bowed at her thankfully.

Hyerin eyed him carefully.

'he's acting so blatantly suspicious it hurts my eyes.'

Nevertheless, she shook off her thoughts and glanced up at the clock once more. "11:17" She groaned in exasperation as she took off her apron and cap, setting it on the shelf. It was late and a Friday night, she scrunched her face up in agony thinking about all the drunk creeps lurking around the streets at this time. And she did not live in the nicest neighbourhood.

"Are you going now?" Minhee had turned around to face the older girl. Propping her hand under her chin as she leaned on the table.

"You know that boy kept looking at you." She smirked at her words , looking for a reaction out of the older girl. Hyerin turned to her,  a stoic expression staining her features .

Next part: Nostalgia [1.5]

[agent-ches]

THOR : RAGNAROK THOUGHTS (SPOILER ALERT)

literally the visuals of the damn film were great, A+++

- first of all THANK YOU TAIKA FOR DIRECTING THIS BEAUTY 

- he literally added all of his little touches from Rachel House as Topaz from The Hunt for the Wilderpeople (there was an easter egg in the first trailer with reference to the movie through graffiti of the Skux Life) to Luke Hemsworth and Matt Damon impersonating Thor and Loki on stage

- THOR TALKING TO A DAMN SKELETON 

- you’re probably wondering how i ended up like this cliche

- THANKS FOR BRINGING IN MY MAN KARL URBAN TO PLAY SKURGE who has a pretty decent character arc from replacing Heimdall to collecting knick knacks from the nine realms (machine guns named ‘Des’ and ‘Troy’, together they’re ‘Destroy’) and trying to impress ladies to temporarily becoming Hela’s Executioner although he hasn’t the heart to kill his own people to trying to be a stowaway (some would call this cowardly but wait) to deciding to fight for Asgard and giving his life as a result, he got his recognition 

- Thor’s hammer antics, putting it in the dragon’s mouth and setting it on Loki’s chest like, “Stay!” and “OW OW OW” yeah that hammer is a real gem, pity Hela had to destroy it, makes sense that she would be able to do so since she wielded it before Thor was ever born when she and Odin had their fun rampaging the realms

- HELA IS THOR’S (and technically Loki’s) OLDER SISTER????????????? WHAT THE HELL????

- Loki as Odin was bloody hilarious, going “Oh shit” the moment his brother shows up (plus the giant statue of himself in gold, really??? a bit much???)

- LOKI LEAVING ODIN IN AN ELDERLY HOME HAH (the damn thing was being demolished like HELLO) 

- Loki having to outdo Thor in some way aka FULL BLACK SUIT, SHIRT AND TIE FROM HEAD TO TOE while Thor is literally in jeans and a jacket (his face when Thor was asked for a selfie though, like how is that ever possible) 

- THANKS FOR BRINGING IN BENEDICT TOO LIKE I NEEDED ME SOME STEPHEN STRANGE BEING SUPER EXTRA AND TELEPORTING(???) EVERYWHERE MAKING THOR WHOOZY (honestly i laughed so hard when Loki said he’d been falling for thirty minutes since Strange opened a portal for him to fall into and then reopned it much later, loved it) 

- Thor disguising his hammer as a damn umbrella and it completely wrecking the New York Sanctum as it flies to him 

- Sentimental bros when Odin passed on IN FRIGGING NORWAY

- The clouds and thunder mirroring Thor’s grief and anger and the sparks crackling like the perfect foreshadowing 

- Thor being a dramatic dork with the most unnecessary costume change of the century, a lightning strike *rolls eyes to the moon and back* 

- CATE BLANCETT IS SO HOT HOLY SHIT 

- HER HAIR TURNS INTO HER HEADDRESS????? WHAAAAA?????

- HELA WHY YOU KILL MY WARRIORS THREE SOBS 

- heimdall the fugitive, cue the mission impossible theme song (completely necessary i assure you) 

- the amount of humour littered throughout the film is ridiculously fantastic so much so that i can’t possibly go through all of it but kudos to Drunk!Valkyrie, that is a mood i can totally agree with

- Loki and Thor arguing like a bunch of children good lord (CAN I JUST, THE GRANDMASTER SUBTLY FLIRTING WITH LOKI AND THOR JUST LOOKING COMPLETELY CONFUSED LIKE ????? GOLD!!!)

- SPARKLESSSSS

- “What’s the word we use for her that start’s with B?” “Trash.” 

- Valkyrie sassing her way through the film, everywhere from speaking to Thor to Topaz and Loki like, what a boss

- Thor getting his hair cut by Stan Lee with a robotic arm (he’s so damn attached to his hair like woah)

- TAIKA VOICING KORG LIKE WHAT A PRECIOUS BEAN THAT GIANT STONE MONSTER IS I LOVE HIM ( he’s so precious “I tried to start a revolution but couldn’t print enough pamplets” + “We’re going to get out of here on that ship, want to join us?” + “I accidentally stepped on [Meek] on the Bridge and I felt so bad, I’ve been carrying him around all day” + Meek wakes up, “HEY EVERYONE MEEK’S ALIVE”) also the subtle explicit jokes did not go unnoticed ahem ahem -.-

- Loki’s projections being a recurring theme throughout the whole movie from the start where he visit’s Thor in the contender’s holding area, “to try and help him” and Thor keeps throwing stuff through him because his brother won’t even try to come and meet him face to face (Korg attacking supposed ‘ghost’ was also adorable), to when Loki is chained up in Valkyrie’s room and Thor throws something at him (it hits him in the head) to check if he’s really present, to when they try to escape and Thor figures out the trick because Loki’s inherent selfishness tips him off, and finally the ending when Lokis shows up after throwing Surtur’s crown into the fire, Thor not even daring to believe his brother is there in the room, “I would hug you if you were here,” and he tosses something at supposed projection only to have Loki catch it, “I’m here”, that was a tender scene between the brothers and I love Taika all the more for executing it as such (he could easily have had Tom miss the object and allowed it to hit him but he kept the moment an intimate one, bless him for that) 

- the classic “HE’S A FRIEND FROM WORK” and Loki’s face when he saw the Hulk, “I NEED TO GET OFF THIS PLANET” *flashbacks to PUNY GOD* 

- Thor’s lightning being triggered by Odin and the Hulk’s punches though, the lightning is so flipping amazing and it’s honestly really cool to watch?????

- Bruce was the Hulk for TWO YEARS????? and Nat is the one to trigger the switch back (also his and Thor’s little frienship squabble was pretty cute, not to mention the Quinjet recognising Thor as POINTBREAK BAHAHAHA)

- Bruce in Tony’s clothes (can i get a little SCIENCE BROS up in here) 

- Valkyrie and Bruce being so damn oblivious 

- “Loki turned into a snake and I liked snakes and then he changed back into himself and stabbed me with a knife WHEN WE WERE EIGHT” and Loki still has the guts to smile, devious little bastard

- “Let’s do ‘GET HELP’!” “No, that’s embarrasing” proceed to Thor literally TOSSING Loki at the guards

- “It’s a leisure ship, the Grandmaster uses it for his orgys” oh lord bless me 

- I don’t have much to say about Heimdall or Hela to be very honest, because we were only briefly introduced to Hela and Heimdall was barely touched on except as a fugitive getting the Asgardians to evacuate. Hela was mostly just stipulated as the villain and sister goddess, though her ability to produce swords continuously is fantastic and nicely presented 

- Valkyrie’s past was cleverly dealt with instead of having a cheesy heart to heart, with Loki showcasing his magic abilities to pluck the memory from her mind and see for himself what really happened that turned her into a drunken scavenger 

- Thor wanting to be a Valkyrie growing up then realising they were all women

- Bruce has 7 PhDs, good to know (none of them are for flying alien spacecraft though, also good to know) 

- LOKI IS ACTUALLY RELATIVELY GOOD IN THIS ONE (although he does halt by the Tesseract and we all can guess that he takes it since he has it in Infinity War) 

- Taika handled the missing Gauntlet fantastically with Hela tipping the relic over in Odin’s vault, calling it a fake, which alludes to the real one being missing, really nice segway right there (she also hovers by the Tesseract and recognises it’s power)

- Thor losing an eye, Loki thinking his new eye patch suits him and Hela saying he looks like their ‘dad’ 

- VENTRESS AKA THE REALLY CUTE AND SCARY GIANT WOLF THAT HELA CALLS HER PET IS SO COOL but also undead so yeah ....

- Asgard is a people (and Thor being their king, decides to take them to earth...) 

- Ragnarok having a completely different meaning by the end of the film 

- “Let me rephrase, how do you think the people will react to you bringing ME back?” “They wouldn’t be very pleased.” and cue what supposedly looks like a giant ass ship from Thanos 

- second post credits scene was mostly for the laughs 

- NO SOUL STONE IN THIS ONE FOLKS 

- things were just a tad rushed in this one but the graphics and fight sequences were gracefully done and i’m satisfied