#to be fair he is a simp and a loser

[paintalyx]

i know that i'm winning in tabletop because i rolled to see if cercil would get food poisoning from the dubious cookies his crush made and everyone cheered when he failed the saving throw

[sjyuns]

🗒️ 、 TYPES OF BOYFRIENDS WITH ENHYPEN!

enhypen ot7 x fem!reader warnings -

( heeseung ) as your loser bf

— don’t be fooled by his stunning visuals, lee heeseung is a loser. he is most probably the type of boyfriend who’ll buy those silly socks with his favourite ramyeon brand patterned on it, asking you to match with him. you can’t say no to him, but blaring red shin ramyeon socks are definitely not the best thing to wear out to meet your friends. you end up persuading him by saying that you’ll match with him when you’re alone and he agrees ( thank god )

the rest under the cut !

( jongseong ) as your embarrassing bf

— when i mean embarrassing, i mean endearingly embarrassing. the kind of boyfriend who will shout across a carpark that he loves you, along with the furious waves of his hands and if that doesn’t make your cheeks red enough, he’s asking ( shouting ) you why you’re not saying it back. he gives immense princess treatment and will bring a camera everywhere, asking you to take a picture every ten minutes. collects them and makes a collage for each date for keeps.

( jaeyun ) as your clueless bf

— sim jaeyun is so goddamn oblivious about anything going around around him it’s so adorable. and it makes him treasure every single surprise ten times more because of this trait. you could literally buy him a lego set and leave it out in the open and he probably won’t question a single thing. when you tell him gossip about a person you dislike, he’ll be like “yeah i hate her too, who is she again?” will get you mixed up with your own story

( sunghoon ) as your competitive bf

— coming from a sports background, how can sunghoon not make everything a competition ( it’s literally entwined in his bones ). imagine going to a restaurant to eat, he will bring it up if his food arrives before yours. even when you bid goodbye to him and tell him that you love him, he’ll definitely say something like “no, i love you more, i win,” when it was never a competition to even begin with. ( but he wins things for you during fair dates so you can’t complain )

( sunoo ) as your simp bf

— sunoo will brag about you anywhere he goes, if you are the topic of the conversation or even if you’re not, he’ll find a way to bring you up. he will stop anything to attend to your needs, and will do anything for you. you’re tired and need help drying your hair, he’ll do it, even if he complains about it “why can’t you do it yourself” he still ends up doing it for you ( god bless me i need sunoo in my life )

( jungwon ) as your possessive bf

— i haven’t really seen much about jungwon being a clingy boyfriend, but i am 1000% sure he is clingy and possessive. has an arm around you at all times, and will constantly compliment you on absolutely anything. most definitely will say “wear what you want, i can fight” and he will fight for you no matter what. is the type of boyfriend to tease you a lot, but can’t take it if someone else teases you.

( riki ) as your playful bf

— you and riki have the goofiest dates that are out of the world, forget watching a movie or going to the fair ( pft boring ) you’re probably having a water fight in your backyard at 2 in the morning, trying to make the weirdest yet tastiest food combinations, filming the weirdest tiktok challenges or seeing who can make the funniest capcut edits. will definitely throw you the worst pickup lines at random moments “hey girl, are you fever? because you make me weak”

© SJYUNS

[joonberriess]

𓆩♡𓆪 “you don’t have to admit you wanna play, just let me rock you till the break of day,” – jock!jk

·˚ ༘ 💌 TAGS — simping at its finest, blowjobs, cum-swallowing, degradation, dumbification, jk is mean but also a praise fanatic, oc is a cute puppy who eats it all up, objectification(?) pretty sure bc jk just has unholy thoughts about oc, oc is THEE it girl, dirty talking, messy lil make-outs, thank you kiss on the tip LOL, PET NAME GALORE, oc is a nice lil bimbo everyone loves ❤️ even jk’s friends luv her

Jungkook listened to whatever the hell Jennie was explaining to him, in truth he stopped paying attention like five minutes ago. He sat there like a fried vegetable just zoning out and nodding mindlessly whenever Jennie looked at him and asked if he agreed etc. He didn’t want to be rude to Jennie but any more of this and he’d go insane he fears.

“So for the powerpoint I was thinking we should..” Jennie’s voice slowly fades out as the sound of the front door opening catches Jungkook’s eye/attention. Holy shit he doesn’t believe what he’s witnessing. He doesn’t realize he’s staring hardcore at Jennie’s poor unsuspecting roommate.

He instantly recognizes you as the girl he sees his team/friends go crazy over. You were quite the talk of the campus—cute, slutty, bimbo-like, these were some of the most common things said. If Jungkook had to admit, you were pretty cute and he’s only ever really seen you casually here and there. He finds himself licking his lips slowly and sitting up while clearing his throat.

“Hi Jennie, hi Jennie’s friend.” You sweetly say while waving at Jungkook politely. He gets an eyeful of tits and soft tummy as you pass by.

You’re wearing this soft pink tracksuit and white baby tee crop top which hugs your pretty little tits just nicely. Don’t even get him started about your backside which is enough in itself to bring a tear to his eye. Jungkook doesn’t realize he’s overdoing it with his staring until Jennie clears her throat pretty loudly.

“Ahem.” She glares at him, “As I was saying,” she shoves her laptop in Jungkook’s face.

He doesn’t see more of you because you end up heading down the hall to your room after saying “bye-bye” to both him and Jennie. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?” He grunts in annoyance.

“Not my roommate Jeon, you can go about fucking anything that fucking walks and has a hole between their legs but you leave y/n out of your lechery. Got it?” She hisses, “I can see the gears working in that stupid head of yours, so I’m warning you. Now help me with this powerpoint asshole, I’m not doing all the work.”

Jungkook internally groans—overprotective roommate, greaaat.

Whole time he works on the project his mind is filled with obscene thoughts and nasty little daydreams he comes up with just thinking about you. Jungkook’s had his fair share of hook-ups but none have ever truly made him go this crazy before. He’s fucking FIENDING for it, would be on his damn knees begging for you to crush his head with your soft thighs if he could.

Too bad Jennie said you were off-limits though. Unless..

Much to Jungkook’s dismay he doesn’t see you for the remainder of the time he’s there. He does see you more often around campus though, whether it’s you hopping out of your very pink car or you running about all over campus with a pink drink in your hands. He can’t get enough of you, and it’s fucking obvious to his friends who make fun of him for it.

“y/n, Kook? Really?” Yugyeom snorts, “Only in your fucking dreams will you ever hit that, your little guy down there probably wouldn’t even know what to do with all that ass.” Laughter all around them erupts as Yugyeom smugly smirks, happy with himself.

Jungkook rolls his eyes, “You’re so fucking stupid,” more laughing, “honestly, if anyone has more chances it’s me, you’re all either losers AND she’s never bat an eye at you. I don’t see any action from any of you either, all talk and shit.” He mutters while taking a drag from the blunt they were all passing around.

“Not true! y/n is a nice girl Jungkook.” Jimin snorts, “Watch,” he turns around and looks over the area for you, “hey y/n!” He yells while waving his arms. They all wait patiently for your reaction, low and behold you just end up proving Jimin correct.

You look confused at first until you smile brightly, “Hi,” you wave back while walking over, “what are you guys up to?” You tilt your head, lips pursed in a adorable little pout.

“Smoking.” Yugyeom replies curtly, “Want some?” He holds the blunt out to you.

Jungkook doesn’t know why but that shit irks the fuck out of him, he shoots his friend a glare and fans the smoke out of your direction before it can hit you. You smell like chai mixed with pumpkin, and he definitely does NOT want to ruin your pretty smell.

“No thank you,” you politely reply and then turn to look at Jimin again, “ ‘m a little sad though, because this morning I tried to make waffles but I didn’t know you had to actually pull the lever down and I didn’t get to eat my waffles.” You sigh wistfully, “See?” You hold out the raw and cold waffles wrapped up in a napkin, “And I don’t like it,” you shake your head, “you’re my friend right Jiminie? Can you buy me some waffles from the cafe pretty please?” You whine.

Jimin turns a little red at the nickname and nods, “Here,” he holds out a couple of bills, more than enough.

The other guys scramble for their wallets, “I’m your friend too right y/n?” They say while holding out their own money to you. Jungkook just stands there slack-jawed, he has never seen his own friends this fucking down-bad before. Oh, but they wanted to laugh at him for simping after you? Funny how the tables have turned.

“Reallyyyy?” You breathily giggle while accepting the money, “Thank you!” You kiss Jimin on the cheek before skipping away with literally breakfast, lunch, and dinner money.

“But I’M the fuckin’ simp? Yeah, totally.” Jungkook scoffs while shaking his head.

Jungkook starts making up an excuse to talk to you from then on. He doesn’t have to do much because you do all the talking for him, he just stands there listening to you ramble on and on about something he doesn’t recall asking. He thinks it’s cute when you stop mid-sentence and say in utter confusion, “What was I talking about again?”

If he could, he’d sit there and just listen to you talk all day. He’s surprised how much he likes your ditziness and dumb little brain fart moments, he finds that he doesn’t mind it so much. Like now, he was sitting there propped up against his car in the parking lot listening to you rant about astrology, time-loops, and anime..?

“Yeah?” Jungkook occasionally says while he watches you passionately explain to him what a fucking shinigami was.

“Think about it—politics and death notebooks, they go hand in hand for disaster and doom.” You softly say, completely side-tracking from the original topic, “I wish I had a shinigami though,” you pout while tapping your finger against your chin, “I think Ryuk is pretty cool. Have you seen the anime?”

Jungkook hums, “No, heard of it but haven’t seen it. So like, shinigami’s come with a death note or what?” He asks, ready for another little rant of yours (he doesn’t mind though). His eyes fall down to your pretty camisole you wore today. You were wearing these cute tight jeans that hung low on your hips, he loved the little pink bows you attached to the belt loops.

“Mm-hm,” you nod, “oh! I gotta go before I forget, all my undies shrunk in the dryer and now they’re pretty tight ‘n they fit a little smaller so now I have to buy some more.” You pout, “Bye Jungkookie,” you throw one arm around his neck as you side-hug him, standing on your tippy toes to reach his height as you press a kiss to his cheek, “bye-bye!” You wave and run off.

“Bye..” Jungkook whispers in awe, he smells a hint of your perfume on his shirt and he vows then and there he isn’t going to wash this shirt anytime soon.

The next time that Jungkook sees you it’s when he’s leaving your shared apartment after another project session. He sees you bent over while poking and trying to pull at the gas tank lid, which is obviously sealed shut. He whistles under his breath and walks over, eyes dropping down to your perky ass which is covered in these pretty little shorts which hug both cheeks nice and tight.

“What you doing down there, hm?” Jungkook leans against the car with his arms folded over his chest and an amused smile on his face, “Having fun?”

“Jungkook, hi,” you greet softly while standing up straight, “I was just trying to get this stupid thingy open because Jennie is letting me borrow her car cause mine is in the shop getting the windows tinted,” you pout, “but I don’t know how to open this stupid thing, and I wanna fill her car with gas as a thank you for letting me borrow it. Help meeeee,” you whine tugging at his arm.

“C’mere,” he loosely wraps an arm around your waist and guides you to sit in the driver's seat, “you see this baby?” He squats down so he’s eye-level with you, his free hand rests over your soft thighs while he points with his other, “You just pull this, and wa-la, the gas tank lid pops right open.” He chuckles and squeezes your thigh.

Your eyes brighten, “Reallyyy? How cool, thank you.” You happily throw your arms around his neck and hug him tightly, “no wonder that stupid thing wasn’t opening.” You giggle.

Jungkook takes a deep whiff of your soft coconut smell, he closes his eyes and sighs in pure bliss. This was the dream dammit, he never wanted to leave this spot EVER. “It was no problem really.” He mumbles more to himself while he stares at your pretty tits.

Fuck the friend code (if you can even call Jennie’s threat that), friend code didn’t have a pair of child-bearing hips and a ass shaped like a fucking peach like you did. Who was Jennie to keep all of you to herself so selfishly?

“Jungkook,” you softly say, “ ‘m gonna give you a thank you kiss.”

Jungkook laughs in amusement over how proud of yourself you look right now, he finds himself shaking his head and speaking in a lower pitched tone, “Yeah, where? Right here?” He turns his face to stick his cheek out.

A tiny little giggle escapes your lips as you nod at him, “Mm-hmm, right there.” You lean upwards to kiss his cheek gently, emitting a soft smacking noise as you happily smooch him. “There.” You say more to yourself.

Jungkook’s eyes drop down to your jiggly boobs which are pretty much in his face at this point. Your camisole somehow dips lower as your tits sit perfectly pushed together to accentuate their size. He tells himself not to but his dick seems to say otherwise as it stirs up in the confinements of his boxers. He already knows he’s about to be sporting a hard-on by the end of this interaction so he gives in.

“Want another kiss..” He mumbles while licking his lips, “But not on my cheek..got somethin’ else you can kiss.”

Your eyes follow his line of sight and you come across the very prominent bulge sitting behind his sweats. Your cheeks feel hot from embarrassment as the familiar throbbing sensation forms between your legs. Jungkook sees this when you suddenly begin rubbing your soft thighs together while staring back at him through half-lidded eyes.

“Whaddya say baby,” he lazily grins, “can I get that kiss?”

You stare back at him with those sweet puppy eyes of yours and nod eagerly.

.

Lips smacking against lips and quiet little moans/noises fill the otherwise dimly lit car (God bless his Mercedes for the interior lighting). You were tucked away on his lap in the backseat of the car, windows foggy and all as your hand slipped from the glass. Jungkook could die a happy man right now with the way he had a handful of ass sitting in the palms of his hands. He gave your soft cheeks appreciative squeezes as he kneaded the flesh roughly—greedily.

His own lips were a bit swollen from the hot make-out session but he didn’t mind, you were one hell of a kisser. One thing he didn’t see coming was how much of a little sex fiend you were, he swears he can’t keep up with how needy and slutty you are. He almost finds it cute how you pout and beg for him to let you have it while simultaneously humping him and refusing to let him part from the kiss.

Jungkook raised his hand and brought it down hard on your ass cheek, relishing in the resounding slap noise and how it recoiled/bounced in place. A slutty little moan escapes your lips as you pull back and pant softly against his lips, “Take ‘em off,” you slur softly, “hate these stupid shorts, gettin’ in my way.” You mumble with a tiny pout.

“Gonna let me see what’s underneath baby?” He looks up through his hooded eyes, grinning when he sees you eagerly nodding back at him, “Yeah? Go on then, slide ‘em off baby, show me what you got on.” He smacks your ass and gropes it harshly, only letting go when you whine at him while unbuttoning your shorts.

He swears under his breath as soon as the button pops open and you slip the zipper down. The hem of your undies comes into view, he sees a tiny bow sitting at the top so innocently and he can’t help but wonder what the rest of your panties are like.. Jungkook reclines back on the seat and parts his legs to make room for you.

You manage to slip your shorts down your thighs slowly with your hips swaying from side to side. Jungkook lets out an audible groan when he sees the cheeky undergarment that was hiding underneath. “Well don’t you look pretty,” he comments while running his hand over your ass, “bet you look prettier under.” He mumbles while licking his lips.

“But what about your kiss?” You pout.

Jungkook smacks your ass wickedly, “Don’t give me that fuckin’ pout. Didn’t know you were that eager to suck my cock, ‘s all you’re good for isn’t it baby? Just a dumb little thing who needs her mouth filled huh?” He grins when he hears you moan, “You gonna be a good little cock sleeve for me?”

“The best,” you happily slur, “ ‘m gonna swallow every last drop, promise.”

He finds it endearing when you hold your pinky out to him, and not wanting to be mean he hooks his pinky with yours, “Good girl.” He brings you in for a gentle little smooch, “Gonna ruin that pretty face of yours baby,” he whispers in-between kisses, “get on your knees for me.”

Jungkook finds that he likes how submissive and responsive you are to him, makes it a hundred times sexier in his opinion. You sink to your knees in front of him without missing a beat, you have your hands set over his knees as you sit there waiting with puppy eyes. “Go ahead baby, ‘s all yours.” He chuckles.

You eagerly paw at his sweats and with his help pull them down alongside his boxers until his fat cock is springing out and slapping against his lower abdomen. Your mouth waters when your eyes land on his perfectly sculpted cock, now you wanna feel it inside of you more than ever. His cock lays against his stomach, flush at the tip with prominent veins on the underside of his shaft.

“ ‘s mine…?” You whisper breathily while pursing yours lips, “ ‘s so pretty..” You’re talking more to yourself as you grab ahold of his throbbing cock and bring the mushroomy tip to your lips. Your tongue pokes out as you swirl it over the head, moaning softly at the tangy taste.

Jungkook bites down on his lip as he watches with hooded eyes, he can’t believe his wet dreams are coming true. Did he save an entire country in his past life? Made sense with how lucky he was right now. He brings his tattooed hand over the back of your head as he simply rests it there, letting you explore his dick like if it was a lollipop or some shit.

Your lips wrap around the head as you make these sloppy little sucking noises. Trickles of saliva begin to trickle down his cock, you use it as lube to stroke his girthy shaft—twisting and turning your hand around it while you noisily swallow around the tip. Jungkook’s lips part with breathy sighs escaping him, he relaxes into the seat and leans his head back with his eyes slipped shut.

You’re working wonders on his cock right now with the way you’re slowly taking more and more of him into your mouth. “Like that,” he whispers more to himself as he moans out again when you dip your tongue into the sensitive slit of his tip. Your strokes become slower but much more intense with the pressure you start applying. It’s getting a lot harder now to control himself from bucking his hips or something.

“Shit, don’t tease me baby,” he groans, “been thinking about your pretty little lips wrapped around my cock for weeks now. Knew you’d look pretty with a mouth full of cock.” Jungkook opens his eyes again to admire the view. “Open up for me baby,” he reaches down to thumb at your lower lip, “there you go—like that.” He grins.

He feeds you more of his cock watching as you eagerly take more and more until the tip hits the back of your throat. It sends you into a small gagging fit but the vibrations and pressure of your throat closing around him definitely sends zaps of hot pleasure down in his groin and lower belly. “Shit.” He groans loudly.

You whine around his cock and pull away to catch your breath, his cock slips from your mouth with a string of saliva connecting your lips to his cock. Jungkook hisses quietly under his breath and reaches down to stroke his slicked up cock, “Messy little thing you are.”

“Off, off, ‘s my turn.” You huff cutely before swallowing his cock in one go now that you’re a bit more prepared.

It takes Jungkook by surprise as he groans loudly and throws his head back. You begin working wonders with that sinful tongue of yours, pairing it with some mean ass sucks. He lets his hand slip from the back of your head to the nape of your neck, just holding you there as he lets you do your thing. You begin bobbing your head slowly while noisily swallowing around his cock.

“Fucking hell y/n,” he whispers slack-jawed, you’re a damn menace. How the hell is he supposed to last? “You just needed something to fill that needy hole of yours didn’t you?” He pants softly, “Knew the moment I saw you that you were made for my cock baby. If only you could see yourself now.” He licks his lips and gives your neck a small gentle squeeze between his fingers.

You slurp up all the slick you leave behind on his cock, your hand sits at the base just idly gripping him while your mouth does all the work. You pull all the way up until the tip sits in your mouth before you swoop back down to take all of him in. He repeatedly hits the back of your throat but you do a much better job at controlling your gag reflex this time around. Your sloppy pace definitely has Jungkook moaning and grunting under his breath.

“Gonna cum,” he sighs, “keep going—like that.” He whispers as a full body shudder falls over him.

You eagerly pull off his cock and begin stroking him at a frantic pace. You watch with glee as his cock begins to throb in your hold, but you don’t let it deter you one bit. You’re eager to see him cum, you want it all in your mouth. “Like this?” You say this while squeezing around the tip and flicking your thumb over it.

Jungkook gasps softly, “Fuck..!” He hisses.

You smile deviously and bring the tip over your lips, “Or like this?” You whisper, blowing softly over his sensitive head before you take him back into your mouth.

Jungkook lets out a mantra of “fucks” and “yes’s” as he reaches down to grip his cock, his hand covers your own as he begins moving your hand up and down on his cock. You suckle at the head and watch as he comes undone. “Oh fuckkk..” He whispers as his cock throbs, cum shooting down your throat as you swallow around him greedily.

He slumps in the seat and pants quietly while watching you clean his dick with your sinful little tongue. He doesn’t think he’s ever cum that hard in his entire life before. He saw the pearly white gates of heaven just now.. “A-Ah shit, no more baby, ‘s sensitive.” He chuckles breathily when you try to suck on his (slowly softening) cock.

You pull back with a cheerful smile on your face, the corner of your mouth has drool and a bit of cum but you don’t seem to mind, “ ‘s so pretty.” You coo like his dick is the most amazing thing ever, he watches you lean over to press a tiny little kiss to the sensitive head.

Are you even real??

“C’mere,” he pats his lap, “I saw the way you were humping your own hand like a bitch in heat the entire time you had my cock in your mouth.” He says as he hauls you up, “You also deserve a nice little thank you, don’t you baby?” He grins while stroking his hands over your soft cheeks.

You nod eagerly, “Mm-hm,” you wrap your arms around his neck and tug him closer, “do you wanna come upstairs after this? I wanna introduce you to my bunny Luna! Oh, and we can watch some anime together because I think it’s lame you haven’t seen Sailor Moon OR Death Note.” You huff in disbelief.

Little did Jungkook know that by saying yes to all that he’d end up staying for wayyyyy longer than he initially planned. You becoming (a important) part of his life was a bonus. <3

TAGLIST: @fragmentof-indifference @jungkooksseuphoria @kooliv @angelarin @jjeonjjk7 @lilliankoo @pb-n-juju @ellesalazar @saweetspoiled @laylasbunbunny @prettyprincejk @cherrysainttt @hyunjinswifeee @joongraduatewithonor @hellbornsworld @leire-mia @m1sss1mp @lissful @winkii @lifeless-firefly @exactlygreatcoffee @taestoess @ayalies @floweryjeons @softtcurse @lilspinachwrld @tearyjjeon @littleobsessedkitty @lovelovelovebts @angeljmnie @rerefundslocals @bangtans-mama @thvhoe @maddkitt @tvse @ohjeon @teteswtnr @jkslovey12 @kelsyx33 @milfpo1ice @sluttydidi @ztyur @beomgyuult @shescharlie @sweet-sourhotcoco @lalita-7 @hazzzelsdimension @p34rluv @kook-net @bonita0-0 @vmapy @dahliadaenerys @gukiebaby @babycandy111

[panda-writes-kpop]

Hey I requested that last yunjin x gn reader can u do another one where they’re sitting at home and he’s trying to help her come up with a song for the new album thank you

my victory - "my sugar" ~ h. yn.

a/n: thank you for the request, and i hope you enjoy this! it's a bit short, my apologies in advance, my allergies are kicking my ass 🥲 it's a bit different than your request so i hope that's alright!

tw: reader is a simp (aren't we all)

��� Masterlist ♡

summary: yunjin has trouble drumming up inspiration (me too girlie) for song lyrics on her upcoming album. As her partner, you take it as your responsibility to help her get out of the house and find her groove. and you get to spend time with your girlfriend - a win-win scenario!

"Babe, stop it!"

Yunjin's screech lands on deaf ears as you plant another wet kiss on her cheek.

"How am I supposed to focus when you-" She turns her head to face you, and you place a fleeting kiss on her lips, "now you're teasing me."

You lazily wrap your arms around her waist before pulling her away from the desk.

"C'mon, you've been looking at that laptop for hours and nothing has come to you. Why don't we go out for a bit so you can refresh your mind?" You suggest as she tries and fails to grab her laptop from the desk.

"I have to finish these lyrics before the deadline-" Yunjin tries to argue, but you shush her with another kiss to the lips.

"-which is a month away, and you're supposed to be relaxing when you're here visiting family and friends." You emphasize the word friends, as if the company that approved the trip wasn't already aware of your relationship.

You wanted to make the most of Yunjin being back in the States, but with her so focused on her group's upcoming comeback, you felt like Yunjin was with you without really being there with you.

"Alright." She reluctantly closes her laptop after you let her go from your arms. "What do you want to spend today doing?"

~

"You're such a fucking cheater." You scoff as you tally up the miniature golf score.

"You're the one who gave me the handicap." Yunjin accuses you as you roll your eyes.

"You said you were bad at mini golf!"

"I said I was bad at mini golf... when I'm without a handicap." Yunjin teases you as you finish adding the scores together.

"You failed to mention that when we started." You sigh as you show her the score card. "You got ten up on me, so you know what that means."

"I'm the winner?" She beams at you, and your crushing defeat is nothing compared to her happiness.

"You have to buy me a pity drink, as the winner."

"No fair!" She whines as you grab the car keys.

"It pays to be a loser." You shrug before unlocking your car.

~

"Cheers." You press your glass to hers. "To love, to us."

"And to sore losers." Yunjin jokes before taking a drink from her glass. "I'm glad you took me out for a date, babe."

"Me too, I can actually have some time with my girlfriend this week." You chuckle to yourself. "Feeling better now that you're out and about?"

"I am, despite your sarcasm, and I've got a few new ideas for that laptop." She presses a soft kiss to your cheek.

"Any of them involve me?" You lean in to kiss her on the lips before she pushes you away.

"None of them, actually." She scoffs after you kiss her. "But I haven't written any lyrics yet, so there's time for you to inspire a few."

You pull her in to another kiss to show your approval.

"Let's head back to my place so we can relax for a bit, and then you can write as long as you want, alright?" You pull her into your arms before she snatches the keys from your hand.

"One more drink?" She looks at you with pleading eyes.

"One more drink." You say confidently, as if the two of you aren't going to spend the rest of the night in each other's arms, the laptop and her work schedule long forgotten.

[misseviehyde]

THIRD TIME UNLUCKY

You really don't take a hint do you loser?

This is the third time you've made your friend take Elixir and turn into me, in the hopes of you both finally losing your virginity. Don't you think it's kind of pathetic?

I can see you slobbering to get your filthy incel hands all over my big tits, but it isn't gonna happen you dweeb. I thought the last time I transformed and kicked you in the balls I made it quite clear that I have zero interest in your scrawny body.

You fucking disgust me and so does he. Two pathetic nobodies who think they deserve to get laid just because they found how to make the Elixir. I bet that little bitch has jerked off so many times imagining becoming me. Imagining having my big tits on his chest, my tight pussy between his legs. He's even sadder than you are.

Too bad for him our memories are separate. He'll never fully remember how good it feels to be me, just that he knows it is better. To be fair, if I was him I'd transform into me every chance I got. I'm definitely the superior version of him.

If you think I'm gonna help you out though, you have another thing coming. I'm going out to have some fun instead. With these big milkers I won't be paying for any drinks tonight at the bar. Who knows, maybe I'll meet some hot guy and spend the night at his getting railed. I bet you'd love to imagine that wouldn't you?

Bah - you're so fucking sad. I can't believe you even thought you had a chance with me. Don't you get it simp? Girls like me don't like boys like you. You're fucking pathetic.

The Elixir has made me into a Goddess with all the natural drives a hot bitch like me should have. I'm gonna make sure your friend keeps getting addicted to being me, I think it's time I took over his life for good.

The only way you're getting laid tonight is if you drink Elixir too and become a girl. Maybe then I'll even make out with you. If you turn out as hot as I did, perhaps we could be friends?

Otherwise get the fuck out of my way. I have no time for reject incels like you.

Now scram...

[justeeeen]

Challengers: A Good Time to be Bisexual

Just watched Challengers. It's 3 am and I'm still thinking about it.

For starters: I LIKED MIKE FAIST FIRST I LIKE HIM FIRST I LIKED HIM IN DEAR EVAN HANSEN OK I LIKED HIM FIRST.

Secondly, I'm realizing that I'm not into tennis enough to have realized just how erotic the sounds people make when they hit the ball are? Like I could handle the make out scenes, the nudity, the almost sex, but the sounds?? Especially for Art, like why did they have this man to make the most erotic whimpery moaning noise I've ever heard EVERY SINGLE TIME he hits the ball (I know why)? Like I felt like I was intruding and I shouldn't have been there. Convinced they locked Mike Faist in a recording studio, blocked out the windows, and had him do what he had to do in there cause that was OBSCENE.

Thirdly, I cannot begin to express my excitement at the resurgence of loser pathetic men in movies. I think Patrick is a loser, but Art is PATHETIC. Like peak simp behavior. He literally turned on his best friend for Tashi, a woman he had like 2 interactions with. To be fair, he was young and dumb and this was by far the worse thing anyone did in the movie, but it's pathetic man behavior. He literally equates her to Jesus. I'm going crazy.

Fourthly, this movie is so fucking sexy. Honestly it doesn't show any physical sex happening on screen, but just, the vibes? The music?? The noises?? Did I mention the noises?? Zendaya is absolutely stunning, and I appreciated their refusal to let her wear a bra in this. Josh O'Connor, I never found attractive before, but there were some shots in this movie where I was like "Ok, yeah ok, I get it." And Mike Faist, the man that you are (between the two of us I originally only wanted to see this movie to see Mike Faist be pathetic).

Finally, this movie is actually pretty straight forward. Tashi says multiple times that all she cares about is "watching some good fucking tennis" and that she doesn't want anyone to be in love with her. As for Art and Patrick, I feel like the only reason they really love tennis is for the relationships they get out of it. Art played tennis when he was younger because he liked being with Patrick and he even mentions that his Grandma is really proud of him, so that's another person he's playing for. And later, he's playing tennis for Tashi. Patrick plays when he's younger for Art, but I think when he's older he might be playing for fame? He just seems like that kind of person. And in the beginning of the movie he seems a little upset that no one knows who he is. Tashi played tennis because she loves tennis, and when she can't play tennis anymore, she's in love with two people who can. And she knows that what they have is the potential to play a good game of tennis. Which is all she cares about. I mean, I don't think that's true. I think she loves Art, but I don't think she respects him (it's giving TomShiv). I think she has more chemistry with Patrick, and potentially loves him more, but thinks she could never be with him because he challenges her too much, and she's too egotistical to be with someone like Patrick who's also egotistical.

I think Art loves Tashi the most, Patrick loves Art the most, and Tashi loves Patrick, but loves tennis above all.

To be fair, I don't support Tashi erasure, like this is one hundred percent a polycule and not like, a gay romance with a woman getting in the way of it. I just think that above all, Tashi loves tennis. That doesn't mean that she's not deserving of love, and that doesn't mean she doesn't love Art and Patrick, she just loves something else more. Tennis will always be the 4th person in their relationship.

At the end they all get what they want. Art wins the game, and wins Tashi by proxy. Patrick wins Art back by physically catching him in his arms and reigniting their friendship. And Tashi gets to watch some good fucking tennis.

[iheartteamnuke]

Every song from Short Circuits 03 by The Garages and how it relates to Skyblock Kingdoms

Because I'm normal. Some background:

WHAT IS SHORT CIRCUITS 03? - SC3 is an album by the garages that came out in February 2022, parallel to the last short circuit season in blaseball (long story). One of the more cohesive albums that the garages made, it's about time, how fickle everything is, and what you do with what you've got. And also has the funniest disstrack ever made. (Also I'm on it)

WHY SBK? - Because there's something so finite about skyblock due to the void that's under everyone's feet, and also they're dealing with god nonsense too. So it works. And I can do whatever I want so there.

OKAY NOW ONTO THE COMPARISONS

diary entry 7/15-7/28 + fourteen days is not enough for my screams to reach your ears: O.S.S.H.A. Avid + Avoid. The horror of realizing everything can swallow you whole so quickly and being unable to stop it. There's so much you want to say. And do. And you can do none of it. So you just have to sit there. Avoid has been in limbo for 1000 years. There is so much he wants to do. So much he wants to say. He can't, there's no time and all the time in the world (if anyone's out there somewhere between me and earth / or somewhere far out in the dark places / I hope my words have brought you some comfort / for one last time, this is Alice, at the end of everything.)

will: Sapphire. Just. Everything about Sapphire. Her imprisonment in Ruby's body and how they've been there for seemingly eons and need to get out (i know my chances are gone / odds almost one thousand hundred to one / but while there's still one / one shot / im searching for a way out / i'll keep searching for a way out), the relationship between Saph + Nav as well as Ruby + Viking in general and how push and pull it is (free me, take me, see you on the other side, let me go). This is the song that made me start thinking about SBK in connection to this album as a whole because it's SO in parallel

STRIKEOUT: Doovid. I continuously describe Doovid as a webkinz soaked in milk (which he is) but he's also a lot of fun! And this song is sososososo fun but is also about the most loser webkinz soaked in milk guy ever. To be fair Doovid is not a loser, but he has the like. Vibe of someone who walked into a party without knowing anyone due to the fact that he is the only average guy on the server full of people CONSTANTLY going through it (when my horoscope said that "my life would be changed" / i thought it meant that i would get to play college basketball / but i'm here, and i hear them call my name / i guess i should go). This song could also be about Milkman if you squint.

hymn to a non-allergic reaction: my song!!! this can be taken in two/three ways- leon simping for olm (if you wanna be funny) or olm possessing vintage (if you wanna be angsty) or O.S.S.H.A. Avid tubing his friends. Hey what if god showed up and wanted you to join his cult and in order to get you to do so he wrote you the most ineffective ad jingle known to man. But also what if he made not-so-subtle threats towards your friends and alluded to your role during the end of the world (so prep your family, say goodbye [tell all of your friends goodbye] / for the sake of peace they all may die). What if you wanted literally nothing to do with this (there is another god in the sky that calls my name. i do not want to listen to it, for it does not abide by science, but nothing in this world makes sense anymore, so f*ck it all, i guess.) but couldn't get away from it so you just. Gave up. Maybe this is also about Fool but idk much about him so bear with me.

two week world: less lore and more meta- SBK and it's community! This is a small community but it's one full of love and collaboration and we will cherish it for a long time. What the SBKers do here is gonna stick with us (maybe one day our light will guide someone home).

just bad: birch please. thats it thats the whole thing. if there's a line to compare it to. were like the netherlands weather in that just like it were bad. i take no pleasure in announcing the facts.

[angelsanarchy]

Tangerine Skies: Possum x Y/N Series CH 4

Tagging: @svgarcaine @icarus-star @romanroyapoligist @tempt-ress @madamemaximoff06 @shady-the-simp @liquidsmoothdomme @auggiethecreator @ethical-cain-vinnel @blacksoul-27

TW: Fucking, P n V, Fingering, Squirting

"Wait, John! Where did my tips go?" Y/n looked for the jar that sat on the countertop.

"You know those have to be split." He snorted.

"I'm the only person working doubles. Who the hell am I splitting them with?" She asked confused and he held up the cash in his hand.

"You know the rules darlin'. I let you work here, you've got to pay me." She hated John. He was a scummy, perverted trash goblin who constantly took advantage of the women who worked at the diner. The one time he made a pass at her, she almost broke his wrist and threatened to cut his pecker off if he ever tried again. Now he's an absolute prick about paying her.

"This is bullshit and you know it." She took her apron off and tossed it on the counter.

"You could always quit. Plenty of broads around here looking for pocket change." Y/n gave John the finger before getting in her car and heading back to the campsite. She must have startled Possum because he ran out of his tent with wide eyes.

"I thought you were a cop...sorry." He admitted. Y/n ignored him and stormed into the RV. Possum stood confused until she burst back out of the RV with a change of clothes in her hands and slammed them down on the picnic table.

"I'm so fucking sick and tired of having to put up with the bastards of this stupid town and making it seem like anyone who wasn't spit out here is some sort of loser." She tore her nametag off her blouse and Possum continued to stand silently, listening to her rant.

"I work really fucking hard to be able to live how I live and all I wanted was to save enough for me to get out of here and back on the road for my next adventure." She kicked her shoes off and started to take her pantyhose off.

"I shouldn't have to work twice as hard because I have goals beyond this place. It's not fair." She started undoing the buttons of the uniform and Possum's eyebrows went up. She peeled the uniform off and stood in her bra and panties now as she raged.

"Why does it seem like I'll never get out of here? Why is it acceptable for perverts to hold the power of a paycheck over someone's head?" She stepped into a pair of shorts and Possum nodded his head.

"Sounds like you had a bad day." He finally spoke lighting a joint.

"I did. I had the worst day and I wanted to quit so bad but I only need another grand before I can get out of here and go where with enough gas." Y/n explained throwing a big shirt over her head.

"I can't help with that but I can certainly help take the edge off." He held up the joint and walked it towards her. She slouched feeling the tension leave her shoulders and Possum smiled, reaching up and pulling her hair down so she was now fully relaxed. Y/n shook her hair out and Possum laughed. She liked to see him smile. She took the joint from his hand and took a long drag of it, stepping back and looking him over.

"How high are you right now?" She asked curiously.

"I'm lucid...why?" He asked equally curious about her questioning. She moved towards him carefully and extended her hand with the joint in it but when he reached for it, she pulled it back towards herself slowly causing him to step towards her. She used her free hand to touch his neck and kiss him carefully. Possum moaned against her lips for a few moments before pulling back.

"Would you object to taking the edge off a different way?" Y/n pitched. Possum moved his lips trying to form words but then made a noise like he was trying to calculate something in his head.

"Are you suggesting that we fuck?" Possum asked casually. Y/n nodded her head and Possum mimicked her nod.

"Yeah yeah that could work." He was the one to grab her this time, taking her by surprise as he kissed her once more. Running his hands up the front of her shirt and gripping her breasts roughly. Y/n felt him backing her into the picnic table until her legs hit it.

"W-wait, the joint." She held it up and ashed it out on the table and put it in his pocket before pulling his vest off. Y/n yanked her shirt over her head and Possum picked her up off her feet by surprise.

Possum buried his face into her tits, still tightly snug in her bra. He sat down on the picnic table and brought her to straddle his waist.

"You don't- you don't want to fuck in the RV?" Y/n asked breathlessly.

"No I enjoy being outside, in nature." He unclasped the bra and let her tits fall into his hands, cupping them and bringing them to his mouth to suckle and bite. Y/n moaned, throwing her back to expose her neck. She could feel Possum hard beneath her and she put her hand down to rub him through his jeans.

Possum stopped abruptly.

"I did this backwards." Possum confessed standing back up and putting her on her feet. She wasn't sure what he was talking about until he started to undress himself. He yanked his shirt over his head and Y/n pushed her shorts to the ground before reaching forward and pulling his jeans to his ankles. He pulled her by the waist towards him as he shuffled his feet now trapped by his jeans and boots. He spun her around to grip the table and pressed himself against her ass.

"Fuck...go slow, I haven't...I haven't done this in a while." Y/n was nervous. Possum's length alone would be a new sensation. He ran his tongue down her back leaving little bite marks on her bare ass cheek before reaching between her legs and feeling how wet she was.

"I won't hurt you. I promise." Possum kissed at her neck, letting his cock rub against her skin before using a free hand to bring his cock to her pussy. He eased in slowly feeling her tense slightly and reaching back to touch his thigh. He cooed in her ear making sure to stay at the pace she wanted him to before he had finally made it most of the way inside of her.

"Fuck you're so big. I feel so full." Possum let his hand fall on top of hers as it rested on his thigh.

"That's a good full right? No pain?" Possum asked making her turn her head to see him.

"God no it feels good. Really good. You can move, please." Y/n begged. Possum took her breasts into his hands from behind and tried to keep a tight grip on them as he started shallow thrusts. He groaned and waited for her to push back onto his cock before he really started pistoning his hips upwards.

"Fuck! FUCK! You're so fucking tight." Possum whined trying to catch his breath. Y/n didn't hide her moans. Possum was right. Fucking outdoors was liberating. She could feel everything all at once and she fucking loved it.

"Fuck, fucking fuck." Possum's pace was becoming sloppy and he pulled out suddenly, making Y/n gasp as he pushed his hand in the middle of her back so he could cum all over her ass, shooting nearly halfway up her spine. He shuttered, stroking his cock carefully, pulling every drop of cum out of himself before using his finger to slide his cum off her skin and onto his fingers. Y/n wasn't expecting to finish but when Possum replaced his cock with his two cum-covered fingers.

"Oh fuck Possum, don't stop." He used this as motivation to spin her around and use his thumb on her clit as he continued to pulse his fingers in and out of her pussy. She gripped him by the shoulders and he leaned against her, letting her pull on his hair and bit his collarbone until her legs started to wobbling and she was squirting down his wrist, screaming. He slowed his hand down, not stopping completely until she put her shaking hand on top of his to halt all movement.

"I've never...I've never done that before." Y/n blushed. She had never actually squirted before or really cum without helping herself along. She blushed and Possum smiled.

"I can show you how to do it all the time if you want." Possum offered and Y/n laughed.

"Right now, I just want the feeling back in my legs first." Possum used his shirt to wipe the cum off her and clean himself up. As they put themselves back together, Possum re-lit the joint and sat down next to the fire he had built early. Y/n walked onto the RV and grabbed a blanket to wrap around herself before plopping down next to Possum with a smile. He silently held out the joint again and she took it, shaking her head.

This was the kind of evening unwinding she wished she had every night.

[wyrmmaster]

I decided to watch a bit of the new Bleach anime as a "might as well" type deal. I got like 10 minutes in before I closed it and was like "I am not getting back into Bleach".

So then I reread Bleach over the past few days.

It holds up pretty well. I was a bit surprised at how just being able to hit "next chapter" on a cliffhanger really takes the edge off a lot of the more meandering and frustrating parts. The first half was still pretty great. The more iconic fights are still absolutely bangers (Grimmjow and Ulquiorra in particular), a lot of the plot is less ass-pull than "huh, actually, that kinda makes sense if you think about it" because you just read the ~context like an hour ago as opposed to a year. The emotional beats are still decently impactful. Also, watching Kubo's art improve over a 15 year period in a couple days was fascinating. I enjoyed myself.

The main takeaway though, what I actually got from the whole thing:

This one?

Still Best Girl. It's not close. Teenage me was right and I still Absolutely Would The Antelope.

Adult Nel has like 100 panels total screentime but it doesn't matter, bro. Someone mentions Bleach and I think of Ichigo first but .0002 seconds later it's the 3 on Nel's back. I got to the point in the Hollow World arc where her kid form shows up with her dumbass servants and was just kind of vibrating waiting for The Thing

to happen. This is AFTER Ulquiorra nearly kills Ichigo (effortlessly) and sends him into complete despair by showing he's only #4, and being pushed to his absolute limit by #6 who was actually playing fair and being amicable. It was obvious she was a bit more important than just Random Child simply because she was an arrancar but #3? Even after the (ostensible) power increase of the 10 from her time it was a wild jump

The past visions of her being arrogant and superior to the weak ass misogynistic loser Nnotria (along with that arrogance being her downfall because she refused to take him seriously on principle - him working with Szayelaporro was Entirely out of her scope of what he was willing or able to do). The instant mood swings from cold and in control to Ichigo Must Be Tackle Hugged. Her absolutely dunking on present-day Nnoitra is still legendary despite the outcome because she was weakened from the get-go and if she'd been slightly more ruthless to what she still saw as a weakling she'd have ended it before her time ran out

Then 380 chapters later she finally reappears and is just her usual goofy affectionate self with a side of casually Asserting Dominance on Grimmjow for telling her what to do. Queen shit. Deserved so much more spotlight.

The funny part is Kubo seems to agree. Apparently he's spent the post manga years simping for her, making her co-ruler of the hollows with Harribel despite the latter being the top dog previously (and implicitly stating if Grimmjow fucked around he'd find out), making her super important to the politics of the setting by being the one the shinigami want to use to make a peace deal with the hollows, and even giving an alt of her a second stage of her Resurrección (that fucks)

Buddy even retroactively declared her the curviest woman in the series over Rangiku and says his swimsuit alts of her in Brave Soul are the greatest swimsuit art to exist.

... He might not even have been using marketing hyperbole.

[frozenmoonshine]

Ok, so, I just randomly decided to make a list of Top 10 hottest (male) TR charcters... No idea why, it just popped in my head, lmao.

I wrote this 97% for the lolz, so don't take it too seriously.

So, here it is:

Top 10 Hottest Guys of Tokyo Revengers

10. MITSUYA - It's common knowledge that he's the Husband Material ™️ of the series! He was introduced as this responsible, mature, reliable guy with a somewhat eccentric hobby, and you may be into the cool, calm, collected, talented, kind ones, who're good with kids and house chores, but you can't convince me that your ovaries didn't do a happy little backflip with his glow-up in the last arc! You just know he's a little devil behind that whole boy-next-door act. 😏

9. SHIN - Ok, throughout the most part of the story, he was just Mikey's dead brother, who Mikey himself led us to believe was weak, generally lame, and a hopeless loser with women. Then we got the flashback chapters in the last arc, and what did we see? Capable, hardworking, caring, loving, selfless, persistant man, strong both in a fight and in holding his ground. Hell, he cared for vegetative Mikey for four years, pretty much all alone, sacrificing his own dreams and life in the process. Also, black turtlenecks and bomber jackets. That's all I'm gonna say.

8. HANMA - Who doesn't love a bit of occasional insanity?! The ultimate troll, both in the verse and in the fandom, tricked us all good! That's just how bored he was. Annoying, completely random and unpredictable, grinning madman who's only there to watch the world burn, by setting it ablaze with his own hotness! I mean, tall, tattoed, well dressed, cocky, handsome bastard, with sleepy eyes, anyone?! I hate the fact that he's giving an inexplicably strong 'boyfriend vibe'! But, I just wanna call him 'Shuuji'... 🤭

7. HAKKAI - This cutie is criminally underrated and slept on! I know Wakui did him dirty by not giving him a more complex personality than just a Mitsuya simp, but look at him! Tall, handsome, strong, blue eyes, lip scar, piercing. No wonder he ended up with a modeling career! And on top of the stunning looks, he's just a pure, shy baby! 🥺 Makes you wanna tease and corrupt the hell out of him! 🤭 Besides, his implied clinginess and loyalty suggest he's a keeper, and if that isn't hot, I don't know what is!

6. MIKEY - The definition and the school example of that old proverb - the strongest poisons are kept in the tiniest flasks. Yes, having incredible fighting prowess is hot, being a capable leader is hot, having endless authority is hot, being "emo" is hot, being painfully cute is hot... We don't care that he's pocket sized (and mentally unstable), with his endless charisma, our favorite gang leader very well deserved his place on this list!

5. WAKA - Simply, he's sexy and he knows it. And we know it. You know it. Your grandma knows it. Everyone knows it. Teen or adult, law abiding citizen or a crime lord, the White Leopard could make anyone anywhere fall for him at the snap of his fingers! ...if he only cared enough to do so, tho.

4. KOKO - Intelligent, smart, sassy, sarcastic, and plain insolent = perfection. This cheeky, well-read, super stylish, handsome motherfucker had us fawning over his strong, passion-driven personality, hidden under the cool façade. What's not to love about a blindly devoted guy?! It doesn't matter if it's the devotion to a cause or a person he deems important (#lucky Inui siblings). But fair be fair, that habit of sticking his tongue out should be X rated...

3. BAJI - If his fiery, man-among-the-men personality, undying loyalty, and endless kindness aren't enough to make you burn like a car, just take a look at that perfectly chiseled face, cocky smirk, and glorious raven locks! Still not convinced? Well, you're either blind, dead, or not into guys at all! We should actually be grateful that his adult version was only ever shown at the very last chapter, cause anything more than that would have been beyond too hot to handle!

2. KAZUTORA - There's just something indescribably magnetic about the whole "redeemed sinner" trope, and that alone would have been enough to get him a spot on this list! But since he also happens to have the handsomest face in the show, a beauty mark under the eye, the cutest smile, a piercing, a tattoo, and a fair amount of badassery and strength, it all sums up to the total of our dear banana tiger being the runner-up!

1. HARUCHIYO - Does this one really need any explanation? Pathological loyalty is beyond hot, wearing a mask is hot, scars are super hot (as already established), suits are hot, piercings are hot, long lashes are hot, pale blond/albino is hot, green eyes are hot, skillfully wielding a sword is hot, smarts are hot, being a little bit deranged is hot... the list could really go on for days, there's literally nothing about him that doesn't make him hot. "...Being a homicidal maniac and a drug addict?" No, he's excused for all red flags on the account of pretty privilege!

[honeekyuu]

Hello! I have returned!!!! Here to ramble at you again but what’s new? Since you said you love live reactions I am here to do that once again <3

I’m sorry I’m still dying at him calling us pretty girl. Like I will never get over it, twirling my hair and kicking my feet as I giggle. Honee I know you’re killing me. I can’t with all the nicknames. This will be the end of me (bakery anon has never been called sweet things like that-)

BAGAHA I’M LAUGHING AT HER DOING AN UNO REVERSE! NOT Y/N MAKING HIM GIGGLE AND KICK HIS FEET BY CALLING HIM CUTE AND SAYING SHE SMILES WHEN TALKING TO HIM. Honestly- same pookie…

Komori and Kita here to smack sense into Suna. Good job boys, knew I could count on you 🫡 I’m sorry he said “That’s my girl.” And my brain unhelpfully supplied me with Howl from Howl’s moving castle. I’m sorry for the person this fic is turning me into.

OKAY SO I AM MAD TOUCH STARVED BUT I DO IN FACT WANT CUDDLES. LIKE LET ME GO TO THE ART FAIR.

You’re feeding us good this week omg. WJFJJSJFJS “new favorite words.” PLEASE. HE’S SO DOWN BAD. GOOD JOB Y/N FOR OPENING UP. I’m so proud of her 😭😭😭 not to be dramatic but I would literally die for her.

AHHHHH HE WANTS TO SPOIL HER. YES. FIND ME A MAN LIKE HIM… like I would combust. JWJFJWJDJSJ TTM Y/N LET HIM LOVE YOU.

HONEE PLEASE THIS IS SO WJNFNSNDJSJ SCRUMPTIOUS. I’M SO EXCITED FOR THE NEXT CHAPTERS. No rush though, I saw that apparently some people 😒 were being not very cute, not very demure, not very mindful.

IGNORE THOSE PEOPLE. I WILL WAIT PATIENTLY FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER LIKE A CAT WAITING FOR YOU TO OUT FOOD IN IT’S BOWL.

Yapping Note Time: GUYS. I LOVE YOU!!!! YOU’RE ALL SO WORTHY OF LOVE AND I HOPE YOU HAVE AN AMAZING DAY BECAUSE YOU DESERVE IT!!!! You guys are all beautiful and even if all you did today was read and stay in bed. You still did something you enjoyed and I’m proud of you! If no one else tells you today allow me, I LOVE YOU!!!! <333

That goes for you too Honee! but also! Remember writing is fun, write for you not other people. I hope your writing fulfills you and that you can look back and get happy when you see us go absolutely feral over it. I love you Honee and thank you for yet another banger of a chapter <3333

-sincerely bakery anon 🍪

HI BAKERY ANON HOW ARE YOU TODAY??? HOPEFULLY WELL!!! im gonna live react your live reacts lmao

suna will NEVERRRR stop with the 'pretty girl'. he has yn saved as 'pretty girl' in his phone, with a black heart and the blushing-hiding-behind-hands emoji like a fucking LOSER. his phone wallpaper is also totally the charcoal drawing he did of 'yn in a pumpkin costume' because he was killing time waiting for suga to figure out how to draw ballerina slippers on his jellyfish

suna is a down bad SIMP, when she compliments him he gets so god damn blushy and nervous and he cant get enough

STOP NOT THE HOWL REFERENCE,,,, bro suna needed his ass handed to him and komori is secretly evil so

she really did open up to him after like 4 days they really took 'friendship progression' and BASS BOOSTED IT

IM SO EXCITED TO KEEP WRITING THIS IT'S LITERALLY MY FAVORITE THING EVER

[pocketramblr]

I like AFO because he's a loser, Giran doesn't have loser energy I'm sorry. I'm attracted to losers only.

Mm having a loser pallet is understandable and a fair reason to not simp for Giran, but there's plenty of cringefail losers in the cast so we can find you a better loser than AfO. Or a worse loser, whichever

[monorail3000]

Might expand on this when I’m feeling more coherent, but I think the main difference between chibs vs Moffat and RTD is that Moffat and RTD are just... absolute simps for the Doctor and Chibnal isn’t 

[githvyrik]

love the word simp. fellas, does your friend openly love and appreciate his girlfriend and like spending time with her???? then he’s a fucking loser

[aceyanaheim]

I should have firgured out I was arospec by how i reacted to Numb3rs tbh like it should have been a clue lmao

[fillinforlater]

Two Selfies

Male Reader x Naoi Rei

Length: 1000 words

Tags: quickie, couple sex, pussy eating, clit play, ass eating, ass fingering, hard sex, doggystyle, cumshot, pre/post sex pic, basically pornography, making people envy perhaps, girlfriend!Rei

TW: QUICKIE; UNEDITED

Inspiration: that Rei picture and random thought kekw

(A/N: I am back, with a quickie I wrote in 35 mins or so. Some bigger things will come soon, promise. @pfxhk I hope you don’t hate me uwu.)

"Vacation Selfie~ Miss you all" Posted by Rei.

In a matter of seconds, dozens of people double tap on the picture Rei posted on Instagram. Her cute pose in the hotel room is admired by her family, friends from work, girls that look up to her and slimy guys that simp for her relentlessly. No matter who, no matter where, they all raise Rei's like counter, while you raise an eyebrow.

Your girlfriend sits beside you on the white cushion. The two of you enjoyed a lazy morning with music on your phones, when she suddenly decides to do this. Not that you are against it, but the lack of anticipation makes you question if Rei really thought it through.

It is an agreement the two of you have decided on, sort of like a code or game. It was Reis idea and it's for her amusement:

Whenever she posts a cute picture to lure in all her desperate male admirers, you have to stimulate her while she chats with them. After that, you are allowed to have your way with her. A lot of things are fair game with Rei, so it's one of your most exciting times of the week.

And now, she triggered it again.

Immediately, you pull down her loose dungaree along with her panties as she gets onto all fours. Rei's hair is always trimmed perfectly, and you relish in playing with her pussy and the beauty surrounding it. As always, she gives her most beautiful, shy giggle while not-so-shly pressing her ass onto your face.

"You taste needy, dear."

"Hihi, not as needy as these guys."

This is the part where you eat her out, play with her highly sensitive clit or rim her gorgeous ass, while she plays with the hopes of some poor losers. It's an evil game and you should be ashamed of doing this—but you feel no shame. There is only room for pride in your head, because Rei is yours.

"You're so pretty. I'd looooooove to go out for ice with you. Terrible. In the trash, hm."

The first comment. The tip of your tongue rests at her hard nub, your fingers gently spread her labia open. Then you move over the slick, juice folds and collect nectar. A sudden suck makes Rei giggle and mewl into her next comment.

"I would literally—hihi, huuuu—die for you, my Queen. Take my humble heart, please. Aww, he tried~."

Your journey continues. You arrive at the valley Rei's full ass cheeks form. Her puckered hole twitches delicately, and you waste no time looking at it any longer. Eagerly you eat out Rei's ass, sucking, licking, dragging your tongue over it. A kiss to her left to start the finale.

"Feels so good~. Are you a door? Cuz I'd smash you. This one is funny, babe—oh God!"

The knuckles of your middle finger disappear in Rei's asshole. Gently you thrust and curl it. Your girlfriend drops the phone and takes her first look backwards. She might still look incredible, wonderful even, but her innocent cuteness is replaced by fluttery eyes and a wide open mouth. Moans and curses fly from it.

"My turn, babe."

"Yes, of course."

"Stay like this. I know how to make your pussy even tighter."

Before she can respond, you fish out your cock and push it against her entrance, finger still firmly in her ass. Then you glide in easily and press your digit down onto the entering cock. Rei gasps and you lean next to her ear.

"So? You want me to leave and let some of these fuckers take your holes?"

"N-no."

"Really? They sounded convincing. Maybe they are good in bed."

"No! Th-their cocks are small and they could never fuck me l-like you."

"Exactly."

Press Rei's head down and fuck away. Her screams shoot into the mattress, the same soaks up her drool. Sadly, not every bit of her spotless back is visible, because she didn't remove her blue top, but with a yank her tits are freed. They are always bigger than in your head and flap around as you pound into Rei's cunt.

Your ass-fucking finger isn't idle either. It moves up and down rapidly, making Rei's incredible tight pussy tighter in crazy intervals. Rarely have you felt this close this early. However, a final extreme is yet to come. 

A companion. A second finger. It penetrates Rei and she shrieks, her legs shivering, mouth gaping.

"B-babe."

"Relax. God, why is your ass so fucking amazing?"

"Babe, ahh!"

This is your favorite Rei: ass up, face visible from the side still, drool all over. Her brown locks stick to her sweaty skin, her ass ripples, but her fat thighs ripple more. And her insane pussy doesn't stop to squeeze out your baby batter. Spurt after spurt is fucked out of your balls, leaving them dry, but satisfied. Rei is perfect. 

Give her thighs a slap, then it's time to pull out. Your dizzy head comes up with a satisfying finish on the fly, as you force her head back up.  God, in this state it’s almost a waist not to kiss her lubricated lips that ruin the blanket with drool.

"Strike the pose from before, quick!"

Rei does as told and you jerk yourself off in front of her. Streaks of white, gooey cum adorn Rei, from her hairline to her bosom. She is perfect, even for painting and as she is still panting and winking with her left eye, you take a picture with your phone.

"Hey!"

"Nice. They all see you like this—"

You show her the original Instagram picture. Rei, adorable, innocent, excited with squeezable cheeks. The Rei everyone has in mind all the time.

"—but I get to see this."

Then you flip to the new pic. Rei, messy, lusty, exhausted with cum-glazed cheeks. The Rei only you have in mind and only you will continue to paint her.

Next time, you’ll fill her cheeks though.