#to be clear this is not investing this is gambling but you should still do it if you have money to spare | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

mllemaenad · 7 months ago

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The Magnus Protocol: Futures

Lena The world is full of opposing forces, some benevolent, most not. In order for the wheels to keep on turning, all these forces need to be monitored and balanced. That is where we come in. Gwen That doesn’t mean anything. Lena And yet it is the only explanation you’re going to get for now. Gwen So what? We’re the bad guys? Lena We are… managing the “bad guys”. – The Magnus Protocol: Futures

Do they now? Do they really? At least in The Magnus Archives it was more that the various forces just were balanced, whether you wanted them to be or not. Oh, sure, there was all the business with Robert Smirke and architecture, and the tunnels beneath The Magnus Institute – but that seemed to be more a matter of accurately observing a phenomenon than of creating one.

John/Jonah Magnus You see, the thing about the Fears is that they can never be truly separated from each other. When does the fear of sudden violence transition into the fear of hunted prey? When does the mask of the Stranger become the deception of the Spiral? Even those that seem to exist in direct opposition rely on each other for their definition as much as up relies on down. To try and create a world with only the Buried makes as much sense as trying to conceive a world with only down. – The Magnus Archives: The Eye Opens

You can't bring one entity into the world; it has to be all of them. If you kick one entity out of the world, the rest must follow. It isn't even entirely clear that they actually are separate beings.

Attempting to use the concept of "balance" to control and empower himself did not work out all that well for Robert Smirke. Frankly, even with all his extra knowledge and study, it did not work out all that well for Jonah Magnus either, in the long run.

But of course, this particular bit of dialogue is immediately followed by a case about the illusion of control. In a lot of ways, Darrien feels like the brother of the gambler from Rolling With It. There is a lot of similarity – except that the gambler had a better understanding of what was happening.

Chester/Statement Giver The thing is though I still don’t really know if they ever made me roll them. I mean, I did. A lot. And I knew that the risks probably outweighed the rewards but I don’t think I ever felt them like “calling” to me or anything y’know? It always felt like my choice. Even if it was a shitty choice. Besides, I've never gotten anything good in my life except by blind chance, so why should this be any different? – The Magnus Protocol: Rolling With It

He knew he was gambling. Yes, there was a "system" but he recognised that it was never going to be perfect. And over time, he got more caught up in the allure of being a mysterious agent of fate than in the benefits he got from actually rolling the dice. The gambler's mistake wasn't in failing to recognise the peril in the act of gambling, it was in underestimating the hold it had over him.

But Darrien – this poor idiot thinks he's in control.

Darrien I took my entire student loan out and got straight to shorting using your app. This was back when it had only just launched. I struggled through your first janky interface, your weird background checks, all those damn glitches but I stuck with it because unlimited Margins and Deposits was pretty sweet. Made some quick cash shorting failing startups then used that to broaden into Crypto, leveraged some EM ETFS, scraped up a few pennies then started to go long on a few obvious winners like Omni and Sparkhub for some hedging. Easy peasy. – The Magnus Protocol: Futures

Shorting is a very high-risk strategy, meaning that Darrien is effectively gambling just as much as the guy with the dice was. But he doesn't think of it like that: to him it's "the plan", and when it transitions to destroying his own life in order to "earn bank" it's "the loophole".

Except ... well, except. He's pretty obviously not gambling, or investing, or anything else within his control. Darrien is being lured. He has only ever invested using Zorrotrade, which had perks that drew him in ... and almost certainly ensured his success, and the eventual failures that led him to the Personal Projection Short Selling settings. He was set up, but is too arrogant to see it – right up to the end.

It's interesting. Looking back at The Magnus Archives, altruism, personal gain, or most often some combination of the two, were perfectly acceptable as entry points for most of the people who got tangled up with supernatural entities. John plied his questioning powers, largely in seasons three and four, to attempt to stop rituals. Oliver Banks attempted to warn people of their impending deaths. Trevor Herbert started out from the perfectly reasonable position of killing vampires who were eating people right in front of him.

That's logical. People in these stories may not be wholly moral but – "Hey, why don't you serve an eldritch god that will eat up your life and strip you of your humanity?" isn't exactly a winning argument. It makes sense that there's a reason. That a person could think doing this could, conceivably, be for the best.

But eventually, you are supposed to stop caring about helping others, or even your own wellbeing, and just give yourself over.

Jude Perry I know now they were simply guiding me upon the path to my true epiphany. All this time I was serving my god, but only for my own glory. But with each new gift, each renewal of the fire, I saw how lifeless and hollow it was, how grey and ashen my existence had become. It became clear that, where once I had destroyed to fuel my life, I now lived for the pain that I caused. And for Agnes. My sweet, hopeless Agnes. – The Magnus Archives: Twice as Bright

And here you have the gambler, who perhaps had the temperament for this business: the sense of drama, the deep addiction to the dice rolls – but ultimately not the stomach for it. And Darrien. Well, he's got the stomach for it: an amputated limb, a coma and a dozen other serious injuries and he's still not fazed. But he was never ever going to give up the self interest. He clung to the illusion of control, the idea that he could demand his "goddamn money" right up until something consumed him.

You can see hints here, of Sam and Gwen and even Celia. Sam the underachieving gifted kid, desperate to find something in The Magnus Institute to explain his circumstances; Gwen the rich woman in the crap job trying to get "in" on the big secret; Sam and Celia together, trying to take control of their odd relationship by putting all their cards on the table – but both clearly hiding a couple of doozies up their sleeves.

Mostly, though, it seems to be a commentary on Lena. She says that there are benevolent forces out there, and that balance is necessary. And sure, maybe. New universe, new rules. Anything's possible. But it would be a new thing, and there's been little evidence of it so far. If you tell yourself these things, though, you can feel like you're in control. So who is she kidding – Gwen, or herself?

And ye gods there is something very wrong with the tech in this world. The Magnus Archives had its haunted tape recorders, sure, but that was a single point of weirdness in a world where the technology largely behaved as expected. But here?

Someone or something seems to be able to listen through virtually any device that has a microphone

Making Adjustments involved streaming inking someone with a cursed tattoo to the world

Personal Screening had an obviously evil website, and closed with a cursed film

Needles and the threatening call to emergency services

Mr Bonzo, who is summoned by recordings of his theme song

... and now the cursed investment app

And Freddy, of course. Can't forget Freddy. It's not every case, but it's enough cases that I'm sure there's a pattern. I am more certain that The Magnus Protocol refers at least in part to network protocols – and that Colin has largely been kept quiet because he could say too many useful things. Colin is stressed, in part, because somebody wants an app.

Yeah. I don't think an app would improve anything about this situation.

Meanwhile, there is Alice's small tragedy. Of course, it was clear even from the trailer that she recommended Sam for the job. But this:

Sam I had a breakdown. Stress. There was an… incident at work. I… freaked out during a presentation. After that they “encouraged” me to move on and I did. Six unemployed months later and I took a job at the O.I.A.R. Celia (slightly cautious) Alice hooked you up? Sam (noticing) Yeah. Full disclosure, we dated at uni and stayed in contact after. I did my best to help her though her parents’ deaths, but… after that we pretty much dropped out of touch. According to her, she dropped me a line about the job after “the most pathetic vague-post she had ever seen.” – The Magnus Protocol: Futures

That Sam had a breakdown and Alice, unprompted, invited him into the OIAR. He didn't reach out to her. They didn't reconnect for other reasons and it just came up. She made that move. Alice who knows her workplace is sinister and advises everyone not to look to closely at the cases – and is suspicious of anyone who does. Alice who clearly still has feelings for Sam. She can chide Sam all she wants about his poking around The Magnus Institute, but she brought him here.

I keep thinking about Tim, and the way he blamed John for trapping him in the archives. John had his share of screw ups, of course, but that one always felt a bit unfair. There was no way John could have known the archives job was extra evil. But this time? If something does happen to Sam – whether that be physical danger or mental distress, or even a descent into evil – Alice can't say her hands are clean. Some of it will be her fault.

#the magnus archives #the magnus protocol #the magnus protocol spoilers

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hug-your-face · 8 months ago

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I cannot overstate how accurate this is.

My own disclaimer: 1. Although I actually know a little something abt how modern "AI" works, having studied neural networks in undergrad in prep for going deep in them in grad school (but decided there was no career in it apart from research bc the datasets weren't there), I'm not deep into the ChatGPT roadmap; 2. While I have made a career out of consulting to exec leadership of startup and midsize businesses and directors of global businesses, I'm not a business prognosticator.

The gamble, and the hype and social effects around the gamble, that @phantomrose96 explains are both spot on. And it's important to understand BOTH. I only understood the first in my undergrad years when I still believed people as a whole act rationally. If I'd understood the second part I might have stayed in the AI game.

To be clear:

The primary gamble is that G-AI can disrupt existing corporate cost structures to the same degree that robots and assembly lines disrupted the cost of manufacturing back in the days when most things were built by hand. And it's hard to tell yet if the tech will ever be able to do that or not. I personally don’t believe it will.

But if it DOES, then the effects on corporate profitability would be SO huge that the mere possibility creates incredible attention and interest. Investors and therefore companies simply cannot afford to ignore it.

This hype creates a secondary gamble: gambling on the hype itself. If there is enough BELIEF that G-AI can reduce costs so much, then there is money to be had in exploiting the hype. As @phantomrose96 said, companies can add in G-AI simply to get more investor cash. Companies can scare their competition by having something the competition doesn't -- whether it works or not. It's like buying stock in a company just because everyone else is buying the stock even though the company is bleeding money: if enough people believe in it, you can still buy low and sell high.

And now we get to the really worrying effect: that companies are going to do whatever they can to CONVINCE investors that they've cracked the code to near-zero operating costs when they absolutely have not. That can include laying off vast numbers of employees and, when whatever service the company delivers becomes nearly-unusable because of course it will, covering up that pesky little fact. Trying to blame customers for making "unreasonable expectations." Making the customer do the work themselves. Passing on the cost of errors to the consumer. Major enshittification, but hailed by the companies as a good thing.

This last bit is the new version of "if you can't afford to pay your workers then your business model is broken." Okay, fine, say the companies: We will just let go of our workers and charge customers more for shittier service.

Woe, doom, gloom! We're all gonna die in G-AI enshittification!

Fear not, there is something we can do. But we have to do it collectively:

We have to call out when companies are regularly failing to deliver what they supposedly say they are delivering. There needs to be counter-hype. Investors care about what the market (that's you and me) think. If a company tries to sell investors on the amazing profitability of their G-AI solution but the investors can say "yeah but people hate your stuff and are trying to not buy it," then the investor will be less likely to invest.

So we need to loudly show that the market thinks: "if you cannot afford to pay your workers -OR- you cannot delight your customers with the workers you have, then your business model is broken."

How you do it is up to you.

It can be as personal as telling this story to others when they experience enshittification. Reminding friends that "actually no, your expectations for the product or service you're buying ARE reasonable. You should look for a different provider."

It could be organizing others into calling out companies posting great profits that are doing it by delivering shit. And loudly saying how you are looking for a different provider, or finding ways to do without.

It could be in hyping up companies that DON'T do this kind of G-AI enshittification. Loudly sharing what a great product or great service you got from a company that actually has enough capable people to take care of you.

(Is there yet some site that rates companies based on how well staffed they are and how good a service they provide as a result? Someone, please make that app.)

It can be as political as raising the issue to your mayor, senator, or congresscritter. Sending stories to consumer protection agencies. Many companies would extract your blood and make you pay for the privilege if they could; it's only being required to operate within the law that makes them do otherwise.

It's gonna be hard, because when EVERYONE is riding the hype train then it's hard to find alternatives, which makes it hard to vote with your dollars.

But it's worth fighting for. Don’t settle for G-AI enshittification.

Thank you @phantomrose96 for writing and publishing what I've been gnashing my teeth about and trying to explain to my friends, family, and clients.

If anyone wants to know why every tech company in the world right now is clamoring for AI like drowned rats scrabbling to board a ship, I decided to make a post to explain what's happening.

(Disclaimer to start: I'm a software engineer who's been employed full time since 2018. I am not a historian nor an overconfident Youtube essayist, so this post is my working knowledge of what I see around me and the logical bridges between pieces.)

Okay anyway. The explanation starts further back than what's going on now. I'm gonna start with the year 2000. The Dot Com Bubble just spectacularly burst. The model of "we get the users first, we learn how to profit off them later" went out in a no-money-having bang (remember this, it will be relevant later). A lot of money was lost. A lot of people ended up out of a job. A lot of startup companies went under. Investors left with a sour taste in their mouth and, in general, investment in the internet stayed pretty cooled for that decade. This was, in my opinion, very good for the internet as it was an era not suffocating under the grip of mega-corporation oligarchs and was, instead, filled with Club Penguin and I Can Haz Cheezburger websites.

Then around the 2010-2012 years, a few things happened. Interest rates got low, and then lower. Facebook got huge. The iPhone took off. And suddenly there was a huge new potential market of internet users and phone-havers, and the cheap money was available to start backing new tech startup companies trying to hop on this opportunity. Companies like Uber, Netflix, and Amazon either started in this time, or hit their ramp-up in these years by shifting focus to the internet and apps.

Now, every start-up tech company dreaming of being the next big thing has one thing in common: they need to start off by getting themselves massively in debt. Because before you can turn a profit you need to first spend money on employees and spend money on equipment and spend money on data centers and spend money on advertising and spend money on scale and and and

But also, everyone wants to be on the ship for The Next Big Thing that takes off to the moon.

So there is a mutual interest between new tech companies, and venture capitalists who are willing to invest $$$ into said new tech companies. Because if the venture capitalists can identify a prize pig and get in early, that money could come back to them 100-fold or 1,000-fold. In fact it hardly matters if they invest in 10 or 20 total bust projects along the way to find that unicorn.

But also, becoming profitable takes time. And that might mean being in debt for a long long time before that rocket ship takes off to make everyone onboard a gazzilionaire.

But luckily, for tech startup bros and venture capitalists, being in debt in the 2010's was cheap, and it only got cheaper between 2010 and 2020. If people could secure loans for ~3% or 4% annual interest, well then a $100,000 loan only really costs $3,000 of interest a year to keep afloat. And if inflation is higher than that or at least similar, you're still beating the system.

So from 2010 through early 2022, times were good for tech companies. Startups could take off with massive growth, showing massive potential for something, and venture capitalists would throw infinite money at them in the hopes of pegging just one winner who will take off. And supporting the struggling investments or the long-haulers remained pretty cheap to keep funding.

You hear constantly about "Such and such app has 10-bazillion users gained over the last 10 years and has never once been profitable", yet the thing keeps chugging along because the investors backing it aren't stressed about the immediate future, and are still banking on that "eventually" when it learns how to really monetize its users and turn that profit.

The pandemic in 2020 took a magnifying-glass-in-the-sun effect to this, as EVERYTHING was forcibly turned online which pumped a ton of money and workers into tech investment. Simultaneously, money got really REALLY cheap, bottoming out with historic lows for interest rates.

Then the tide changed with the massive inflation that struck late 2021. Because this all-gas no-brakes state of things was also contributing to off-the-rails inflation (along with your standard-fare greedflation and price gouging, given the extremely convenient excuses of pandemic hardships and supply chain issues). The federal reserve whipped out interest rate hikes to try to curb this huge inflation, which is like a fire extinguisher dousing and suffocating your really-cool, actively-on-fire party where everyone else is burning but you're in the pool. And then they did this more, and then more. And the financial climate followed suit. And suddenly money was not cheap anymore, and new loans became expensive, because loans that used to compound at 2% a year are now compounding at 7 or 8% which, in the language of compounding, is a HUGE difference. A $100,000 loan at a 2% interest rate, if not repaid a single cent in 10 years, accrues to $121,899. A $100,000 loan at an 8% interest rate, if not repaid a single cent in 10 years, more than doubles to $215,892.

Now it is scary and risky to throw money at "could eventually be profitable" tech companies. Now investors are watching companies burn through their current funding and, when the companies come back asking for more, investors are tightening their coin purses instead. The bill is coming due. The free money is drying up and companies are under compounding pressure to produce a profit for their waiting investors who are now done waiting.

You get enshittification. You get quality going down and price going up. You get "now that you're a captive audience here, we're forcing ads or we're forcing subscriptions on you." Don't get me wrong, the plan was ALWAYS to monetize the users. It's just that it's come earlier than expected, with way more feet-to-the-fire than these companies were expecting. ESPECIALLY with Wall Street as the other factor in funding (public) companies, where Wall Street exhibits roughly the same temperament as a baby screaming crying upset that it's soiled its own diaper (maybe that's too mean a comparison to babies), and now companies are being put through the wringer for anything LESS than infinite growth that Wall Street demands of them.

Internal to the tech industry, you get MASSIVE wide-spread layoffs. You get an industry that used to be easy to land multiple job offers shriveling up and leaving recent graduates in a desperately awful situation where no company is hiring and the market is flooded with laid-off workers trying to get back on their feet.

Because those coin-purse-clutching investors DO love virtue-signaling efforts from companies that say "See! We're not being frivolous with your money! We only spend on the essentials." And this is true even for MASSIVE, PROFITABLE companies, because those companies' value is based on the Rich Person Feeling Graph (their stock) rather than the literal profit money. A company making a genuine gazillion dollars a year still tears through layoffs and freezes hiring and removes the free batteries from the printer room (totally not speaking from experience, surely) because the investors LOVE when you cut costs and take away employee perks. The "beer on tap, ping pong table in the common area" era of tech is drying up. And we're still unionless.

Never mind that last part.

And then in early 2023, AI (more specifically, Chat-GPT which is OpenAI's Large Language Model creation) tears its way into the tech scene with a meteor's amount of momentum. Here's Microsoft's prize pig, which it invested heavily in and is galivanting around the pig-show with, to the desperate jealousy and rapture of every other tech company and investor wishing it had that pig. And for the first time since the interest rate hikes, investors have dollar signs in their eyes, both venture capital and Wall Street alike. They're willing to restart the hose of money (even with the new risk) because this feels big enough for them to take the risk.

Now all these companies, who were in varying stages of sweating as their bill came due, or wringing their hands as their stock prices tanked, see a single glorious gold-plated rocket up out of here, the likes of which haven't been seen since the free money days. It's their ticket to buy time, and buy investors, and say "see THIS is what will wring money forth, finally, we promise, just let us show you."

To be clear, AI is NOT profitable yet. It's a money-sink. Perhaps a money-black-hole. But everyone in the space is so wowed by it that there is a wide-spread and powerful conviction that it will become profitable and earn its keep. (Let's be real, half of that profit "potential" is the promise of automating away jobs of pesky employees who peskily cost money.) It's a tech-space industrial revolution that will automate away skilled jobs, and getting in on the ground floor is the absolute best thing you can do to get your pie slice's worth.

It's the thing that will win investors back. It's the thing that will get the investment money coming in again (or, get it second-hand if the company can be the PROVIDER of something needed for AI, which other companies with venture-back will pay handsomely for). It's the thing companies are terrified of missing out on, lest it leave them utterly irrelevant in a future where not having AI-integration is like not having a mobile phone app for your company or not having a website.

So I guess to reiterate on my earlier point:

Drowned rats. Swimming to the one ship in sight.

#ai #artificial intelligence #llm #large language models #chatgpt #enshittification #long post

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sarafscreening · 2 months ago

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Best Halal Coins to Invest in 2024: Sharia-Compliant Cryptocurrencies

In cryptocurrency, finding investments that align with Islamic principles can be challenging. For Muslim investors, Best Halal Coins to Invest in 2024 provides an ethical and Sharia-compliant solution. This blog will explore the top Halal coin investment options, how to choose them, and why they matter to the Muslim community.

What Are Halal Coins?

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Top Halal Coins to Consider in 2024

Here are some of the Best Halal Coins to Invest in 2024 that are gaining popularity among Muslim investors:

Islamic Coin (ISLM): This coin is specifically designed to be Shariah-compliant and aims to bring financial independence to the Muslim world. It has been vetted by Shariah scholars, making it a trusted choice for a Halal coin investment.

OneGram (OGC): OneGram is a gold-backed cryptocurrency. Each coin is tied to a physical gram of gold, making it a stable and ethical option for Muslims looking for a safe Halal coin to invest in.

X8 Currency: X8 Currency is another coin that has been certified by Islamic scholars. It is backed by a combination of eight fiat currencies and gold, offering both stability and Sharia compliance.

HalalChain (HLC): HalalChain is a blockchain platform that focuses on ensuring transparency in halal product supply chains. This coin is popular among Muslims who want their Halal coin investment to support ethical causes.

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While there are many options for Halal coin investment, it is essential to follow a few guidelines:

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sattamatkaleakmobii · 5 months ago

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beardedmrbean · 6 months ago

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Federations are treading lightly with their public comments, aware that they could be sitting across the table from National Rally (RN) ministers if the party scores a major breakthrough in the June 30 and July 7 ballots.

Local business group U2P would "respect the people's choice, but the RN has to say more precisely what it proposes on questions with a tax, social and economic effect on small firms," its chief Michel Picon told AFP.

At the last presidential election in 2022, the outfit had warned that RN chief Marine Le Pen's manifesto promises "would have bad consequences for business," he recalled.

At stake are issues such as returning to an official retirement age of 60 – raised to 64 in a wildly unpopular Macron reform last year – and a still harsher crackdown on immigration.

"What does this mean for people working for us today?" Picon asked.

"We're business players who don't get involved in politics," said Thierry Cotillard, head of the Mousquetaires/Intermarche supermarket chain.

But "whoever the politicians are, we will fiercely defend our positions," he warned.

'Stick your neck out'

Centrist Macron's time in office has been marked by reforms aimed at making life easier for businesses and high-profile courting of foreign investment.

By contrast, "we know nothing" about the RN's plans, said the head of one major European industrial firm's French subsidiary on condition of anonymity.

"We've just seen the beginnings of a reindustrialisation for 10 years, with supply-side policies bearing fruit. Will all that be kept up?" he asked.

Macron's Finance Minister Bruno Le Maire on Tuesday urged business to "stick their neck out" against the far right.

Groups including the big companies' federation MEDEF should "clearly say what they think of the different parties' economic programmes" and warn about "the cost of Marine Le Pen's Marxist plans", he added.

Read moreFrance’s Macron calls snap election in huge gamble after EU polls debacle

Without naming any party, MEDEF told AFP in a statement that "a new campaign is starting in which we do not share certain political visions, which are incompatible with business competitiveness and prosperity for our country and fellow citizens".

The CPME small-business group called for supply-side policy, greenhouse emissions reduction and welfare state reforms to continue.

It also warned about France's staggering three-trillion-euro ($3.2 trillion) debt pile, which ratings agency Moody's said Monday risked a downgrade due to the "potential political instability" from the upcoming election.

"Anyone taking on costly reforms without taking this element into account would be exposing France to a major risk," the CPME said.

The head of a firm on France's heavyweight CAC 40 stock market index, also speaking on condition of anonymity, said there was no reason to panic as the RN winning was "not a done deal".

Even if they did, they said, "everyone wants to upend things, but once in power, being responsible for things will make you responsible."

'Low-carbon electricity essential'

One sector with particular fears for a far-right victory is renewable energy, which has already been waiting for months on a government roadmap stretching to 2035 and including items like sites for massive offshore wind parks.

"What's going on is serious," said Jules Nyssen, president of the Renewable Energies Union (SER).

"We're in a state of total instability, just when we need legal guarantees and clarity," he added, saying "it's going to cost us heavily".

"We have a clear roadmap that we need to eliminate carbon emissions," said Nicolas de Warren, president of the UNIDEN association of big industrial energy users.

"What's essential for us is access to low-carbon electricity at competitive prices, whether it's nuclear or renewable".

In 2022, Le Pen promised a fleet of around 20 new nuclear reactors – although her 2031 timetable for delivering half of those was seen as unrealistic.

But she is also a committed opponent of wind energy, vowing a moratorium on new construction and the gradual dismantling of existing parks – plans incompatible with France's climate commitments.

"The laws of economics and energy will catch up" with the RN if it comes to power, one electricity provider said on condition of anonymity.

"We need more cheap energy. Building nuclear takes 10-15 years. What do we do while we wait? And how do we attract battery factories if we don't want any more electric cars?" he added, citing another of Le Pen's bugbears.

#nunyas news

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icemaninvestments · 11 months ago

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IceMan Investments Update – Mid Season 2023/24

New Year greetings from your favourite anti-fascist betting blog.

We start 2024 with ongoing crises and misery in Ukraine and Gaza. We also confront the electoral rise of the far right across Europe (with the welcome exception of their setback in Poland).

We have the almost unbelievable possibility that Trump gets re-elected in the States (more on that later). The only bright spot on the horizon is the almost certain defeat of this mean and corrupt Tory government.

As usual IceMan is always punting for a purpose and will donate some of the inevitable profit to Anti-Fascist organisation Hope not Hate.

Ok on with the Football before we get too depressed. As usual we have some Teams who already look home and dry, some still very much in the mix, a couple heading to the loss column and an absolute stinker. Here goes....

Premiership, Arsenal without Man City 9/4 now 16/5 (ShitePrice)

If you had suggested to me at the start of the season that Arsenal will end the Christmas break a place behind Man City, I would have been well happy, however I would not have expected City to be third and Arsenal fourth. The improvement of leaders Liverpool is not a complete shock, it is the fact Aston Villa sit third that is really surprising. At this stage, this bet looks like a loser. There is a good chance Villa may fall back in the second half of the season, it is making up a 5-point deficit to Liverpool that is problematic. My only hope is that Arsenal can add some reinforcements including a top striker in January and then massively improve, even at that Liverpool still need to wobble. It ain’t over yet, but not optimistic.

Championship Leicester City Promotion 13/8 now 1/66 (IcePrice)

Gary Lineker is a prominent supporter of this club; I say that cos just mentioning his name upsets so many Daily Mail/Torygraph Gammons. Given that they were relegated last season and took a gamble on appointing Enzo Maresca, I was not entirely sure that Leicester represented good value at 13/8. That price now looks a steal. Delighted with this position, top of the table and even more importantly 13 points clear of third place, looking set for automatic promotion. I will be collecting on this.

League one – Bolton promotion 11/4 now 8/13 (IcePrice)

This is a very competitive division. Bolton are second with a game in hand and only two points behind Portsmouth. Looking good for automatic promotion. They are, however, only 2 points clear of third placed Peterborough, a team I seriously considered backing. Bolton can hopefully hold on to an automatic promotion spot, failing that, they are nailed on for a play-off slot. Looks an excellent chance of a pickup.

League Two Stockport 5/4 now 1/8 (IcePrice) and MK Dons 11/4 now 6/1 (ShitePrice) both for promotion

Stockport aka ‘The Hatters ‘due to the town’s historical link to the Hat trade, it actually has a Hat Museum. are on top of the league so automatic promotion looks on. They have a six-point margin, however 4th placed Barrow do have a game in hand, so this is closer than the market suggests. Stockport have dropped a few points recently, albeit against some good sides, which has allowed some of the chasing teams to close the gap. MK Dons were the second choice, and I was backing them as more of a play-off team. They currently sit one place outside a play-off position, though they have games in hand, so very much in the mix. Expect to collect from Stockport. MK Dons should make play offs and we can take it from there.

National League Chesterfield 6/4 now 1/66 (IcePrice) and Gateshead 25/1 now 5/1 (IcePrice) Promotion

Chesterfield aka ‘The Spireites ‘(due to a crooked town church spire) was a bit of a shortie , however I would have to been a total contrarian to overlook their chances. Only one automatic promotion place in this league, Chesterfield look good for it as 7 points clear with games in hand. Gateshead were selected as they represented excellent value to be competitive for a play-off place. They have not let us down and currently occupy a play-off slot. Expect to collect on Chesterfield and optimistic Gateshead can make the play offs.

Scottish Premiership - Aberdeen without Celtic/Rangers 9/5 now 10/1 (ShitePrice)

Very disappointed with The Sheep and am moving this into the loss column. They have been shockingly inconsistent and are in 9th place, 13 points adrift of 3rd. They do however have 3 games in hand, it is difficult to imagine them making up that much ground, main rivals Hearts are having a steady season, so can’t see them imploding. Aberdeen may also lose some of their best talent in the January transfer window.

In better SPL news, Celtic are top and have beaten Rangers for the second time this season.

Scottish Championship - Dundee United 11/8 to win the league now 4/7 (IcePrice)

I wish I could be as confident as the markets on this one, I had expected ‘The Terrors’ to be 5 points clear at this stage, currently they sit in second, 3 points behind the leaders Raith. Importantly they do have a game in hand and a superior goal difference. A downside is that they lost a recent head-to-head match with Raith, on the upside they do have a stronger squad which could be reinforced in January. I would expect this to prove a critical advantage in the second half of the season. Optimistic of collecting on this.

Scottish League One Hamilton Academicals 5/2 to win the league now 7/2

This league looked like a matchup between perennial under achievers Falkirk and recently relegated Hamilton Academicals, so called as they were established by students from Hamilton Academy. . Having previously had my wallet burned by Falkirk, I considered Hamilton to represent better value. Up until recent weeks this has been the case, as it was hard to separate these sides. However, Hamilton have faltered a bit of Late and have gifted Falkirk what appears an unassailable advantage. This looks destined for the loss column; however, you can never underestimate the ability of Falkirk to grab defeat from the jaws of victory.

Scottish League Two - Stenhousemuir to win 6/1 each way now 8/15 (IcePrice)

In contrast to my other Scottish selections ‘Stenny ‘are bang on the money. They are in tremendous form and find themselves 11 points clear in the top spot. A caveat is that other teams have played less games, but a bird in the hand and all that. Stenny looks a cert for top 3 and I fancy them to push on and win this league. Going to collect something, for sure.

Bundesliga - Union Berlin top 4 11/4 now 1500/1 (ShitePrice)

Every season there is a pick that turns out to be an absolute shocker. This year it is Union Berlin, a surprise package last year, I fancied them to kick on this season as many of their potential rivals appeared weakened by selling top players. This season Union have been rubbish, they are in 15th place, 21 points shy of top 4. Enough.

Politics Lab/Lib Coalition 7/1

No change in this position, the current cash out exactly matches my stake. I am cashing it out as I now don’t expect a formal coalition even if Lab come up a bit shy of an overall majority.

***New***

Hungary -Euro2024 150/1 E/W now 100/1 (IcePrice)

I love to through a dart at an underrated long shot in tournament football. Politically Hungary being successful would be a nightmare. Far right leader Orban is a massive football fan and would milk any triumph. On the other hand, 150/1 is a big price as many teams of equivalent capability are trading below 50/1. Hungary won a not overly challenging qualifying group and have a young squad led by Liverpool player Dominik Szoboszlai.

Democrats to win Presidency

I have taken a safety approach of backing Democrats rather than Biden specifically who is available at 9/4. Biden is almost certain to be the candidate but doubts around his age and his current unpopularity mean he could stand aside. TBH, I would welcome that happening, and his being replaced by Gavin Newsom or Gretchen Whitmer. The real worry about this bet is that it is an Even money shot, the Democrats should be 1/20 on running against Trump the narcissistic sociopath, Trump is actually a marginal favourite in most books. Trump is campaigning as a full on white Christian nationalist and being upfront about his fascistic tendencies. This is a bet where the financial winnings are irrelevant compared to the real-world geopolitical consequences.

The MAGA cult and GOP enablers seem all in for syphilitic, Adderall addicted whack job. Things are getting desperate when you start to hope that the recent Trump smells revelations on the internet are true and might dent some of his popularity. The MAGA cult will have no problem voting for an authoritarian bigot, but do they want a President who literally shits his adult nappy and stinks the place out.

City of Troy - 2000 Guineas 13/5 now Evs (IcePrice)

I can’t help myself; I do love an ante post bet on the Guineas. I got on to City of Troy prior to his impressive Dewhurst win. As I have found to my cost, brilliant two-year-old form does not always translate to winning classics at three. On the plus side his trainer Aidan O’Brien seems genuinely enthused and he knows a good horse when he sees one.

Late Night Pass -Grand National 35/1

Still my favourite sporting event. I normally get involved in February when the weights are released, however this year I am getting in early as I was very taken by the prospects of Late Night Pass who has had two good outings this season. This has not gone unnoticed in the market, though he can still be backed at a generous 33/1.

Matteo Berrettini - Wimbledon 28/1 E/W

This is a very tentative and small stakes dip into the Tennis markets. Berrettini is a great grass court player as evidenced by the fact he was a finalist at Wimbledon in 2021. He has recently been injury plagued which is obviously reflected in this price. So, hoping he can reach Wimbledon fully fit and in the form that enabled him to hit the World no6 ranking.

That’s it .

IceMan Investment Portfolio – Punting for a Purpose

Smash the Fash

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otterpedia · 1 year ago

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I think I'm gacha fatigued. I played quite a few games with gachas in them this year and after having my soul crushed repeatedly by my crappy pulls in DTW while my friends and my wife pulled characters I desperately wanted and gleefully showed them off to me (which is valid, and I'm genuinely excited for them too), I decided to reexamine why I was even playing some of these.

I want to begin by making it absolutely clear that I know gachas are gambling. I am aware of my gambling addiction, which I'm pretty sure is equal parts hereditary on my mother's side as well as a kind of mind game these activities trick your brain into. I have a lootbox problem and I am especially vulnerable to costume collecting.

I saved up tons and tons of gems or orbs or tickets or whatever for this game and that game, and because one game in particular had such powerful hooks in me, I didn't notice that my expectations for every other gacha were unrealistic.

I spent actual, real-world money that I needed for new clothes or a haircut or funds for going out and touching some fucking grass on the teeny tiny chance that I could get just one more character or costume or event prize for my digital harem simulator or whatever.

I like to collect things. (Hoarding is also a genetic failing on my mother's side, come to think of it.)

That's why these games are so dangerous in my opinion. I'm glad I don't like any other form of gambling games, and that cute anime girls were the motivation instead of the temporary thrill of winning.

Genshin Impact appealed to me because it felt like a "real" game that just so happened to have a gacha. The way the odds worked for the banners were also very F2P friendly, or so I told myself, with a guaranteed 4-star character or weapon every ten pulls.

The story was robust and the music was gorgeous. The fandom seemed pretty chill in my little corner of the internet, though I did hear the occasional rumblings of shipping drama. I read quite a few fanfics that were cute or funny or even spicy. It was a nice break from other games, or something interesting to do when Final Fantasy XIV had longer maintenance periods and I was anxiously waiting to log back in.

I truly love the world of the game still, even though I haven't played in probably at least a month and a half. I was super hyped for Sumeru, and I pulled my favorite character on my birthday last year.

That being said, I wrongfully assumed the new area in Genshin Impact would make me feel as before. The newest chapter of the main story dropped last week I think and I barely even noticed.

I felt nothing.

There were adorable cat people and steampunk elements and underwater exploration things and I. Felt. Nothing.

I decided that was enough of a reason to quit the game. If I'm not emotionally invested anymore, then why keep playing? I tried to quit before a couple times, but then I convinced myself that it had become a money sink, an investment.

That's not how games should make me feel.

Logging in started to feel like a chore. Grinding for ascension materials or talent scrolls or artifacts was tedious and boring. There were too many characters to keep track of, and they kept adding more and more stupid gimmicks. If I missed even one day of an event I wouldn't be able to finish it in time and receive rewards that would never come around again.

If I didn't log in, I told myself, I would get left behind by the friends I play co-op with. I would waste everyone's time because they would have to go back and redo stuff because I was lagging behind again because I play a lot of other games besides this one.

If I stop playing, I can't stay in the discord server we made for Genshin and I can't see all the funny memes and cool screenshots and drawings and fanfic recommendations.

Somehow I convinced myself that I had to keep playing this game that no longer held my interest or made me happy because if I didn't, then I'm letting my friends down.

This isn't the case, of course, but my brain likes to bully my heart a lot. I'm not letting anybody down. If anything, Genshin Impact has let me down. I have the power to uninstall the stupid thing and never touch it again. It's my damn computer, my phone, my life!

I like Genshin Impact still, but I don't play it anymore. If my friends are disappointed by that, that's okay. They're not disappointed in me, hell, they probably sympathize with my disappointment in the game because they are my friends, duh.

There's no reason to stress myself out over this. Which is why I needed to just write it out and be done with it.

So, there you have it.

I'm excited that my friends are excited, and that's good enough for me right now. If that changes in the future, then I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.

And if my friends come across this post, I just want to say:

Thanks for playing with me, you guys! ❤️

#talking to myself #possibly delete later

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janisurstemostrespectedtrade · 1 year ago

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Janis Urste Better Your Forex Experience By Bettering Your Strategy

Janis Urste Professional tips provider. If you wanted to build houses for a living, you would have to work as a carpenter and learn about how to plan and build. The same holds true for anything you decide to do in life, especially if you're entertaining the idea of trading currency pairs with Forex. You first need to learn about the marketplace and how to operate within it, and here are some tips to get you started.

One important tip to keep in mind with trading forex is that nothing is for certain. This is important to keep in mind so that you can prepare yourself for failure and possibly trade in a way that inflicts the least amount of damage on you financially. You need a clear plan on how much risk you can allow and still remain on top.

Avoid the "set and forget" robot products for handling your trades. People will always try to profit off of making your trading "easier" with "foolproof" automated systems. If these magic products worked, why would these sellers want to share them? Taking your decisions out of the equation through "get rich quick" robots only profits the seller.

Start your trading career with a plan, set clearly defined goals, and stick to them consistently. Your strategy will be different depending on whether you want your trading to be your primary source of income or just a source of extra money. Additionally, you can protect yourself from excessive loss if you have already decided what risks are too great to take.

Understand the currency rates. You will need to do math to understand the differences between the dollar and the yen, but figuring these equations out quickly can help you master the fast-paced decisions required in forex. Always remember which unit you are using as a comparison, or you may miscalculate your finances.

If you are interested in getting into the forex market, you have to understand that it is not a game, and it is not worth taking a gamble. Before investing any money, you need to analyze and study the market so you know exactly what you are getting into.

Janis Urste Qualified tips provider. Start small. When first starting out in the forex trading market, start with a small initial amount, and use your trading gains to further fund the account. If your account is losing money, adding additional outside funds will only serve to increase your losses. Increasing your account through gains is also the most surefire protection from getting in over your head.

When it comes to investing, don't try to choose stocks. It can be a very dangerous game to simply pick and choose stocks, especially if you do not know what you are doing. When choosing how to invest, get help from someone you trust unless you have adequate knowledge in choosing stocks.

Familiarize yourself with a little bit of European geography "in a financial sense" when trading with forex. One great point to remember is that the Swiss Franc has a very close relationship with the Germans, meaning that it's tied in closely to the Euro zone. Information like this can help you plot a plan of attack.

When starting out in forex trading, limit the amount of your trades per day to about 10 to 20 Pips per trade. Get great at making profits little by little. Once you accomplish making small amounts of money, start increasing the amount of Pips per trade slowly to try to make more money.

Choosing your broker is important, so don't select anyone until you do your research. You should be worried about more than just signing up with a scam artist! Even if he is a legitimate broker, you need to be sure that he also works effectively with people at your level of experience.

Don't trade with the money you need to buy your everyday food or pay your bills. Set aside a small amount from each paycheck to be used in your trading. Be sure your family's well being and everyday financial situation won't drastically change even when you have bad luck and you wipe out your trading account.

Get a good Forex broker to help you advance your career in Forex trading. Make sure your broker is well-qualified and has all the proper training and certification. Connect yourself with pro-traders who can help you understand all the ins-and-outs of Forex trading. You can make good connections while you are figuring out Forex with your demo account.

Janis Urste Expert tips provider. You should be ready to trade at any time of day, and even of the night. A good opportunity might not come up during your free time. Make sure you are always connected to forex in one way or another, and have access to the internet or be able to trade on your phone.

Trade in popular currencies. Good choices for a novice include positions involving the U.S. Dollar, Euro, British Pound, Swiss Franc, or Yen. Well-traded positions have a more liquid market, making them easier to buy and sell quickly. It can be difficult to exit a thinly traded position, forcing you to hold longer than you might want.

You should always use the stop loss order and limit order, to keep yourself at a safe level when doing any trading on the Forex market. If you don't know what either of these terms are, then it's probably best that you step back and learn a little more before you truly begin trading because these are very important things to be aware of.

Don't start a Forex trade if you're too busy to do your research! It's much better to wait and lose nothing than to trade in a hurry and lose everything. Take your time, check the charts, and make a trade based on rational thinking and successful math. This is the way to increase your income and negate your losses.

Janis Urste Best service provider. As you read up top with the housing analogy, you can definitely think of Forex in a similar light. You must build a foundation, build strong walls, and then erect your roof and put on the finishing touches. Make sure you're applying these Forex-related tips, in order to lay your foundation and to build the rest of your house.

#janis urste #janisurste #janis urste janis urste #mr janis urste #janis urste | most respected traders #janis urste | most respected traders #janis urste janis urste #janisurstemostrespectedtraders #janis urste forex janis urste forex #janis urste janis urste

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jodybensonsharp · 2 years ago

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Jody Benson Sharp Working The Forex Markets To Your Advantage

Jody Benson Sharp Professional tips provider. At first, the Forex exchange may sound or look very similar to the other markets that are popular among investors, but this is not the case. A knowledge of the Stock Market does not give one any added advantages in this new field, aside from a basic understanding of mathematics and margins.

Forex Market automated trading software can be helpful with providing multilingual support and at the same time be easy to understand with tutorials that will help you when you encounter difficulties. Choose software that offers a money back guarantee program. Do not spend a great deal of money on an automated program if you can't afford one. You will quickly lose money this way.

Avoid highly leveraged accounts when you are new to forex trading. Though rewards can potentially be phenomenal with a win, a loss will be a multiplied disaster. Do not get any leverage on your account until you have been trading a while and better understand the risks involved with leverage.

Beginners coming to Forex in hopes of making big profits should always start their trading efforts in big markets. Lesser-known currencies are appealing, primarily because you assume no one else is really trading them, but start with the bigger, more popular currencies that are far less risky for you to bet on.

In order to make good trades on the foreign exchange market, you must not be superstitious. Trades should be made through research and calculations. If a certain trade is bothering you and you are unsure of it, it is best to stay away from it. It is better to be safe than sorry.

Just like with many other situations in life, if you are trading with Forex, it is important to try to stay calm. By stressing your self out, you may not make wise decisions and you could end up losing a lot of money. Also, try not to be too greedy.

If you are just starting out in forex and you are still hesitant about investing your own money, sign up for a demo account with a broker that will enable you to try out your forex investment skills. Demo accounts allow you to trade with virtual money. It is a great way for you to practice without risking any real money.

Jody Benson Sharp Qualified tips provider. When trading in the foreign exchange market, you should study the markets carefully. Market fundamentals are important to the success of any foreign exchange trader. Faulty market analysis, while not a career killer, can be detrimental to your overall profit gain and cause more damage for your market mindset in the long run.

To find the right Forex signal software or firm, you should look for free trials. During your free trial, pay attention to the frequency at which you receive signals, and how accurate they are. Do not hesitate to try more than one signal at once so that you can compare their quality.

Have clear goals when you open a position, by placing a take profit order and a stop loss order. These set the goals for your trade and cut your losses when your trade goes wrong. Always have a defined, solid exit strategy when you trade, otherwise, you jeopardize your money.

Always have a reason for entering a forex trade, as it encourages you to make logical decisions regarding your trades. Ask yourself why you think the trading move you are contemplating is a good idea. If you cannot come up with a solid basis for doing so, then perhaps you shouldn't do it, as any trading move made without reasonable justification is simply gambling.

An important tip to consider when trading forex is that you need to be extremely cautious of who you accept advice from. With a touchy and unpredictable market, people's choices are not going to be too predictable, nor are those who are trying to read their minds. Be sure to study history and how trends have changed over time.

Make a plan and stick to it. Sit down and evaluate what goals you are trying to reach. If you randomly decide to start trading forex, or you don't take the time to think about what you are trying to accomplish, it will be too easy to flounder around. Success in forex is based on having a plan.

When money is involved, emotions can often run high. And when emotions run high, we don't always make the most logical decisions. Successful traders with excellent money management skills, therefore, have learned to walk away from the "trading table," so to speak, when their emotions are running high and wait until they're in a calmer state of mind before making trading decisions.

Once you have chosen the time frame to trade with, always take a look at the next largest time frame. You will then have an idea of the trend by defining the price movements of the market. If you a trading with a 15 minute time frame, check out the 1 hour charts.

You should be able to understand your trade plans and easily be able to explain them to someone. If you are not sure if you have gotten the plan down, pull a friend or a family member aside and try to explain your plan to them. If you cannot explain it in a clear way, you need to sit down and rethink your plan.

You will find many complicated methods to trade with Forex: stick to the simple ones. They are easier to learn and understand, and you cannot afford to use a method you do not fully understand. Complex methods do not mean you will make more money, but they increase your risks of making mistakes.

Jody Benson Sharp Expert tips provider. As you can clearly see, the Forex is an entirely separate entity and should always be treated as such. It is easier for newer investors to approach because of the lower start-up and brings in profits at a more solid rate. Consider your options, adjust your finances, and when ready - jump into the market!

#Jody Benson Sharp

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reitbd · 2 years ago

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pipcupid · 2 years ago

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Thinking About Trying Forex? Check These Tips First!

Pip cupid Top service provider.In today's trading world, trading on the foreign exchange market can be a more than risky business and must be executed carefully. This article will give you some tips and help you gain some knowledge about forex trading, so you can begin to trade currencies on today's volatile world market.

Over trading and trading with emotions on forex will get you in trouble every time. Don't get too greedy when you're on a winning streak. Don't try to get revenge after losing an important trade. Use strategies based on clear thinking or the result will cost you money.

With trading, the only thing that you can be sure about is what is going on now. You should never add money to a losing investment. While the currency may go up, this is a gambling position that has ended badly many, many times before. Be smart with your money and know when to pull out.

When trading a foreign currency pair, it is important to do your research on both currencies in the pair. Knowing a single currency out of the pair isn't enough. Successful Forex trading depends on being able to see how the currencies might impact one another, not just how one currency is going to behave.

Deciding to use software, or Forex automated trading systems, does not mean you will have instant success on the Forex market. Trading skills and money management skills are still desirable when trading on the Forex market. Learning from experience and patience can eventually lead you to the path of becoming a highly successful Forex market trader.

Avoid using Forex robots. It makes money for the people that sell these things, but does nothing for your returns. Make decisions on where to place your money and what you want to trade before actually doing so.

You can always stand out of a trade, you have that personal right. If you are doubtful about your position of a trade, it is best to stay out of it. If you do not have enough information to make an informed decision, it's better to sit out of the trade than to make risky uninformed decisions.

Forex makes a demo that should be used before doing the real thing. This will give you the practice and experience that you need so that you can make money when trading instead of losing your hard earned savings. Most people fail at trading simply because they do not have the knowledge needed to succed, so to overcome this, just practice first.

Even more so than with other investment opportunities, forex is not a place to park money that a trader cannot afford to lose. Emotion is the enemy of the successful forex trader, and it is impossible to overcome emotion when the trader is using capital that he or she needs to pay bills and living expenses.

The only reason people trade with Forex is to make money, and that's something you should certainly remember. You're there only to make money, and sometimes that takes a slow, methodical, logical pace. This is money you most likely need to survive, so take great care of it in there.

Trade within your budget. When trading you want market trends, rather than your financial status, to dictate when you take up positions in the currency market. Also, if you risk more than 3% of your total balance at any one time, you may not be able to hold onto potentially profitable trades if the market temporarily turns against you.

If you're new at forex, make sure you start with a mini-account and don't play with too much money. Allow for a learning curve so you can learn the market and minimize your losses when you're just starting out. It can be tempting to jump in completely, but give yourself time to learn the ropes.

When you open a position on the Forex market you should take careful stock of the time frame - the current trend on the market and where it is likely to go. Certain portions of a trend involve greater or lesser risk and greater or lesser profit. Tailor your position to the needs of the moment.

Pip cupid Qualified tips provider.Abandon a Forex prediction when market movement renders it inaccurate. Predicting the way the Forex markets will move is hard work. If you put effort into making your own predictions you are likely to get attached to them. You always need to be willing to murder your darlings, though. A prediction that does not reflect movement accurately is worse than useless.

Keep a very detailed journal about what you have done on the market. It will help you learn your tendencies so you can better understand what your weaknesses are and how to avoid loss. You will benefit by maximizing your strengths in a more efficient manner which will in turn make you more money.

Because Forex trading can be done with countries around the world, keep in mind that it is possible for you to trade at any time, even in the middle of the night. This is important for people who are too busy to do Forex trading during the day because of other commitments.

If you want to avoid losing money, you should look for a broker that offers a stop order feature. This means that you cannot trade more money than what you have in your account. This way, you cannot lose money that is not yours and then, find yourself in debt.

You should look for real time data to find the best charts. Many charts will offer an analysis based on the whole week or the whole day. These charts give you a good overview of general trends on the market. But, when you make a decision, you need to know what is going on at the exact second.

Pip cupid Top service provider.This article has given some effective trading tricks and tips for Forex trading. Hopefully, you have learned enough to feel confident as you begin trading and to get started earning some serious money.

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crowsmybeloveds · 3 years ago

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Shadow and Bone Series: Chapter Two

In Cold Blood

Pairing: Jesper Fahey x Reader

Summary: The Crows continue to visit Y/N at the Emerald Palace, and make some interesting developments.

Word Count: 4.8k

Warnings: Implied suicide (don’t take it too seriously hint hint); abuse; Pekka Rollins; again canon typical violence/slave stuff (this time it’s described more, but again nothing graphic); the Menagerie;

A/N: Thank you so much if you liked the first chapter!!! This one is a little longer and I promise the end isn’t as bad as it might seem.

Masterlist

~~~~~~~~~

Jesper Fahey liked to do his own thing. Sure, as a member of the Dregs he had to listen to his boss and go on jobs, but he loved his free time in between. Hence, he often avoided going on little arends for Kaz at all costs. It would be a waste of his time.

Jesper Fahey was now talking to Kaz. Volunteering for an arend. For the fourth time this week.

Kaz, Inej, and Jesper had been visiting the girl in the basement regularly since their first meeting with her. Kaz chalked it up to business, the girl and her potions were powerful assets, but the other two would admit they had found a new friend.

There were rules to these visits. First, only go during the day. Even if it seemed counterintuitive to sneak there in the broad daylight, Y/N insisted she would be unavailable in the night, as that was when her “work” was done. Also, if you are there, you must hide well behind the crates, and remain armed. You were lucky every time you made it out of there alive.

It was a daunting task, but Jesper was always up for it.

“You’re going to go there again?” Kaz asked him, eyebrows raised, “You know it’s Inej’s turn, correct?”

“Yes, and I also don’t care,” Jesper answered, “Also, she probably has things to see, people to do, and whatnot. I, on the other hand, have my whole day cleared. And I couldn’t deprive the lovely basement girl of this face.” He smiled, pointing to himself, “I mean, come on.”

Kaz stared at him, seeing through his antics in a minute. Jesper had taken a liking to the girl. What will happen the day he visits to find she’s not there anymore? Kaz thought. His hopes are too high.

“Fine, Jesper,” He agreed, “but be careful not to draw attention.” He scrunched his nose. “Do your best not to dawdle.”

“Right, I’m off then!” Jesper exclaimed as he clapped his hands together and ran off.

“I’m going tomorrow!” Kaz shouted after him.

The sharpshooter knew his boss was suspicious of his actions, but in all honesty he didn’t care. Normally he would have thought there wasn’t much spending time with her could do, as she had told him many of the same things over and over. That must have meant she had told him all that she knew. But Jesper was not going for information, he was going to be with her. He liked to think they were friends.

Jesper was often distracted. Whether he saw a pretty person to flirt with or a table to gamble at, he always found a way to not be doing whatever he was supposed to. Everything around him was so appealing and stimulating, especially in the Barrel. Even so, he sped down the streets without a single double take or second thought as he headed to the Emerald Palace. He really wanted to see her. So bad it was addicting. At first he thought that maybe the girl was drugging him, seeing as that is her particular expertise, but soon he realized that he just liked her. She was funny, and she laughed at all his jokes. She was also so intriguing. So powerful yet rendered powerless. He was enchanted, but he knew something was missing. It seemed it wasn’t her fault. He wanted to help.

That day when he arrived at the window (after making sure no one could see him, of course) Jesper saw Y/N sitting against the wall with her legs hugged to her chest. He called her name softly, and waited for her to reply. She didn’t reply, or even move. Against his better judgement, he shouted louder, risking being discovered by one of Pekka’s crew. He didn’t care. He banged the windows. Praying she would say something. Or turn her head. Or nod. Anything. She didn’t. A single tear rolled down her face.

Y/N had been sitting there for three hours. There wasn’t much to be said about what had happened. Only that she did not remember, whether her loss of memory was intentional or not. It was an off day, that’s all.

Jesper was panicking. He had no idea how to get her to wake up. That is, if she was asleep. Truthfully, he did not know what was wrong with her or what to do. Unfortunately, his noise making had roused a different group of people. Jesper had to run down the alley as he heard shouts coming his direction. He ran the rest of the way home, still in shock. He was not haunted by his near escape with the Dime Lions, but the look on the girl’s face. What had they done to her?

“And she didn’t move at all?” Inej asked. Jesper had just explained to her what happened after he showed up to her room at the Slat. She hadn’t appreciated being woken up from one of her rare naps, but she didn’t complain when she saw the look on his face.

“Not that I could see,” he replied, shaking his head, “Inej, I swear she could hear me.”

Inej did not know what to say. This kind of behavior was not usual for Jesper. He had his normal amount of energy, but it was not often it was all directed to one place: worry. It was odd that something upset him and he did not distract from it by going to gamble or making a joke.

“I just, if it were you I’d understand, but who could ignore me?” he said, “Going unnoticed is not a Jesper talent.”

There it was.

“You’re deflecting” She called him out, “It’s not funny. We should tell Kaz.”

“That's not funny,” Jesper replied, “what is Kaz gonna do? Tell us to stop talking to her?”

Inej sighed. It’s possible that he would advise that. But he also wouldn’t just let Pekka Rollins keep his most dangerous weapon. Especially not when she didn’t seem to have much loyalty. She had told Inej so many times. The girls had a bond due to the Menagerie, and Y/N told her much about her past and present. She explained different chemicals she had made and plans she had heard to Kaz. But with Inej, she explained how she felt about them.

Y/N hated every second in that basement. She had told Inej as much. Repeatedly. But she was rather scatterbrained. She repeated herself often and forgot things that she had already been told. She would forget what day it was and what she had done the night before. Inej had experience with trauma and sleep deprivation enough to shrug this off. She didn’t want to cause her friend anguish by questioning it.

The incident Jesper was describing made her think that maybe she should. Y/N was smart. Hell, she was a self taught Grisha fabrikator. So good, she could kill people from miles away. How could she be so forgetful? Someone so scientifically gifted must have a better mind than that. Someone must have been messing with it.

After some convincing to Jesper that Kaz would not kill or give up on Y/N, the pair made their way to their boss’s office.

“I was waiting for this to happen,” was Kaz’s response.

“What, that’s it?” Jesper raised his voice, “You have nothing else to say?”

Kaz glared at him from his desk. “I don’t know that you thought through your attachment to her, Jesper. You should never have assumed she was on our side.”

Jesper stared bullets at his boss in front of them. They seriously weren’t going to help her at all? She needed to get out of there, he knew that for certain. If it wasn’t because he cared about her then it should be because she is an asset. A good investment. Saints, he hated calling her that.

He didn’t say any of this, however, and instead started to walk out of the office. Just before he was out the door, he heard Brekker speak up.

“I’ll go and see her tomorrow.”

When Kaz Brekker reached the girl’s window, he gave it exactly seven taps with his cane, with a very specific beat. It was a signal he had made with Y/N so that she knew to open the window and talk to him without him having to raise his voice.

The girl turned toward the window at the sound. She set down the bottle she was currently working on and walked over. Kaz started speaking as soon as it was opened.

“How long have they been drugging you?”

Y/N scoffed, “Hello to you, too!”

“How long?”

“Um, never?” She replied, getting confused. “They don’t drug me with anything. I’d notice. That’s kind of my job description.”

Kaz looked to the side, thinking. The only way to explain her odd behavior, forgetfulness, and calmness in her position was that she was being manipulated. And because she was constantly making poisons and “potions” for Pekka, it made sense that she was being given her own drugs without her knowledge. He had thought this since he’d met her. She had to be on some sort of relaxers when he first saw her. Why else would she have so willingly opened the window for strangers?

“Why did you ignore Jesper when he was here yesterday?” He asked, hoping to get the information from her in a more roundabout way.

“I didn’t?” Y/N asked, “Inej was here yesterday, she got those vials of knockout gas you asked for.”

Kaz squinted at her, “Y/N, that was two days ago.”

She shook her head, “No, no, because I was working on those just yesterday and I just finished them when she stopped by. I haven’t seen Jesper in a couple of days, Kaz. Are you feeling ok?”

Kaz wasn’t sure how to react to this. She had missed the whole day? He was sure things like this had been going on this whole time, but never in the month since they began speaking with her has she forgotten a whole day. She had to have taken something.

“Are you self medicating?”

“No! Why- what are you talking about? What is going on?”

“Y/N, Jesper came here yesterday and you were sitting in that corner near catatonic. You wouldn’t speak or even move.” Kaz informed her.

“He must not have shouted loud enough, I was probably asleep.”

“You normally sleep with your eyes open?” He is tone was sharp. “Jesper said you were crying.”

She didn’t respond. She was shocked out of her mind. It was possible Kaz was lying to her to get some sort of information out of her, but it didn’t seem that way. He looked uneasy, the kind of unease that comes from not knowing something. He was a very smart man, and when something did not make sense to him he got nervous. So, this must have actually happened. And if she could not remember it, something was terribly wrong.

“I’m sorry, Kaz. I just don’t remember.”

“Fine. Then I need you to stop eating the food they give you. I’ll have Inej stop by with something to eat during the day.” Kaz paused, thinking. “And I would like to get you out of here, and have you join the Dregs. I just have to figure out how.”

“No, Kaz. I can’t leave.”

“Why? You have loyalties to Pekka Rollins?” He asked, anger clear in his voice.

Do I? She thought. While she knew his treatment of her was unfair, she wondered whether or not she still cared about him. In her time at the Emerald Palace, Pekka had told her many things about how he was the only one who would ever care for her. He claimed that he had saved her from the Menagerie, and he was taking care of her because he loved her. He also said that he would help her find her sister, often claiming that the potions Y/N was making was helping him follow leads about her.

When he started bringing men down into Y/N’s room, she was only a teenager. The first man that had ever touched her in that room also told her information about upcoming trips, which Pekka used to choose the perfect time to rob his house. Y/N felt disgusting in her skin ever since, but Pekka reassured her. I’m sorry , canary. I’ll protect you. Those men are not like me. While any sane person would call giving her food and shelter supplying her basic needs, Pekka called it courtesy. A gift because he loved her. A gift that could be taken away. He let men take advantage of her just so she could get him information, and then called it love. And she believed him. Until one day.

A man had come down into her room, which was usual for her on any given night. However, this man started out rough and stayed that way for the rest of his visit. She had tried her best with past men to get as much information as she could through simple flirting and drugging, but he was not there for small talk. For a brief moment, she considered saying no. In the moment following, she remembered what happened the other times she had done so.

She didn’t get any of the information she had been asked to draw from the man. Pekka was livid. The argument following had been explosive and painful. Not just emotionally.

“This isn’t love.” She tried to say it in a firm voice, but it came out broken and weak.

“How could you possibly know?” Pekka replied.

“Because you don’t deny it.” She said, summoning the strength to look up at him. “The men who come down here sometimes mention their wives. They might not be the pinnacle of married men, but I know they would never do this. This is bad for me.”

“Oh, is it so bad for you?” He raised his voice. “And who is going to treat you better, hm? Who out there would possibly care about you like I do?”

She turned her back to him. She sniffled as she cleaned up her worktable, silently hoping he would just leave.

He grabbed her arm, whipping her around to face him. “I don’t care if you hate me. You will stay here because of Anais. You will stay because you need me.”

The memory was scarring.

Kaz watched as Y/N got lost in her own thoughts. His voice startled her out of her memories. “Y/N, do you have loyalties to him?”

“My sister, Anais.” She breathed. “He is helping me find my sister.”

“Is that all?”

She shook her head. “You don’t understand. I need to find her. Have you ever had any siblings?”

Kaz paused for a moment. The comment seemed to toy with him. “No.”

“Then you don’t get it. I want to be with people I belong with. To figure out where I’m from.” She sighed. “Pekka is helping me with that.”

“And he has proven that he is actually doing so?”

“He said that he knew she was involved with the slavers who took me away. He is getting in with them to try and figure out where they took her.”

“Y/N, I don’t think he is actually doing that.” Kaz said, shaking his head. “This is your reason for staying?”

“And I have nowhere else to go!”

Kaz took a deep breath. He had decided what he was going to do for the girl since the day he met her. She was an asset. With her power he could complete jobs and gain kruge with record speed. Not to mention, if Kaz had her on his side, Pekka didn’t. The sweet taste of revenge covered his tongue just at the thought.

“I have an offer,” he began, “You come with me. Not now, but soon. I’ll come everyday to ask questions and we’ll plan your escape. In the meantime, you gather your things discreetly and try to find as much dirt on Rollins as you can.”

“But my sister -“

“If you are a part of the Dregs, you will help when asked, but the rest of your time is yours. Look for your sister, gamble your money away, take up baking, — I don’t care. You’ll be free.”

The offer was good. Great, actually. So why was she hesitating? Was Pekka’s manipulation really enough to make her turn away an opportunity like this? I don’t know.

And what about Kaz? Could she really trust him? The man wanted her for her powers, too. How was he different from Pekka? In her limited experience, he wasn’t. I should stay.

But Jesper. In the short while she had known him, Jesper had become her favorite part of being alive. And Inej, who was the kindest soul she had ever encountered. If they were with Kaz, he couldn’t be the demon he tried to be. At least not like Pekka. I should go. I should have gone a long time ago.

“Deal.”

In the weeks following, Kaz came every day to discuss every aspect of the Emerald Palace with her, in the hopes that he could get her out. Getting her out of the building would be simple, but keeping her from being hunted by the Dime Lions for the rest of her days would be complicated. The plan would have to be completely airtight, so Kaz needed time.

A few days later, Jesper was at the window speaking with her. The other members of the dregs would often visit along with Kaz and stay to talk to her, or they might come in his place. Today, after describing her entire tailoring process to Kaz, Y/N was speaking to Jesper about music.

“It’s like this huge golden machine made by Fabrikators, right?” Y/N smiled as she excitedly spoke. “And you take this small disc, place it on the machine and put the needle on it, and then music comes out!”

Jesper grinned at her. He loved the way she looked when she was excited about something. “I don’t know if I’ve ever seen one before.”

“Well, it’s wonderful,” she sighed, “Not to mention there’s thousands of the disc things, and each one is a different song. I wish more people had them than just the rich men who can afford it. I mean I wish I could have one.”

The two had been known to discuss things that had nothing to do with her escape, which Kaz had scolded them for plenty of times. But they enjoyed talking to each other, and they often got distracted. Odd topics of discussion were bound to happen whether they liked it or not. However, when Jesper realized that they had strayed from their original reason for speaking, he redirected the conversation.

“So, you get tailored nearly everyday?”

“Well, whenever anyone comes to see me. Only Pekka knows what I really look like. And you and your friends. Maybe it's a security thing.” She told him, thinking as she spoke. “Also, if anyone sees me who isn’t supposed to, I’m meant to drug them so they forget. Pekka really just does not want anyone knowing I’m here. Some bastard might try to steal me away.”

Jesper smirked at her. “I cannot imagine who would ever do something like that.”

Visits were going relatively well. Kaz had nearly enough information to finalize his plan for her escape, so he visited less and less. Y/N was becoming a solid member of the Crows even though she had so little time with them. She matched Jesper’s humor, built trust with Inej, and had a shared anger for Pekka with Kaz.

Today was Inej’s day to go visit Y/N, and she was running rather late. She knew the girl had mentioned not to visit after the sun went down, but Inej had been busy all day and could only find time to make it to the window after dark. When she got there, however, she realized why Y/N had made the warning.

When she looked through the window, she noticed that Y/N was not alone. When she looked closer, she realized Y/N was with Pekka Rollins. Luckily, Inej was the Wraith, she could watch what happened next without being seen.

“I don’t understand why you wouldn’t want to eat your dinner,” She heard Rollins speak first, in the most condescending tone she had ever heard. “Not after I worked so hard to get your favorite.”

Y/N sat on her cot, avoiding eye contact. “Not hungry.”

Rollins grabbed her by the jaw roughly, forcing her to look at him. Inej noticed tears shining in Y/N’s eyes. “Not hungry, hm? We both know that’s not true.” He laughed, with a terrifying lack of humor behind it. “Why are you lying to me, canary?”

The girl shook her head as the tears fell down her face.

“Your tears will do you no good.” Rollins snarled. “Do not forget what you are.” He paused, raising a brow. “What are you?”

The girl sniffled and didn’t respond.

“What are you?” He shouted and raised his voice this time, causing her to shake.

“A canary.” She whispered out.

“Good, and if I give you a song...”

He raised her chin higher, prompting her to finish his words. “I sing it.” The words fell from her lips like something rehearsed, but unbearably painful.

He gave a tight lipped smile. “Right. Don’t forget it again.” He sat down next to her and handed her the plate she had sat on the table beside her. “Now you eat and I’ll tell you about the man who is coming here tonight.”

Inej felt like she was going to throw up as she travelled the rooftops of Ketterdam back to the Crow Club. She knew Y/N was being mistreated at the Emerald Palace, but seeing it take place was something entirely apart.

As she walked in the doors of the club she felt a presence beside her. She looked over to see Jesper walking with her. He must have been guarding the door. He was waiting to ask a question.

“Yes, Jesper, I went to see her.” Inej spoke to him, her voice rough.

“And?”

“And Pekka Rollins was there.”

Jesper stopped in his tracks. “Saints, is she ok? Are you?”

“I’m fine,” Inej assured, “But I’m not sure about Y/N. He is anything but gentle with her. And he forced her to eat the dinner he gave her. I don’t think she’s gonna be able to avoid the drugs they give her anymore. If only she could remember to take an antidote before her mind goes.”

“Shit, we need to get her out of there, soon.”

The pair once again went to Kaz to discuss the girl, only to find him at his desk, writing furiously with two bottles in front of him.

“Kaz, Inej -“ Jesper was cut off.

“She told me how she’s been killing all those people.” Kaz stared at the bottle in front of him, observing it scientifically.

Inej and Jesper looked at each other before looking back at their boss. What was he on about?

“I don’t understand.” Inej had a confused look on her face as she tried her best to make eye contact with Kaz. She wanted to try and read him like she knew she could, but right now the man in front of her was like a blank page.

“Y/N. She gives them a liquid of her own design, but it isn’t poisonous,” He kept his eyes trained on his work, “At least not until she makes it poisonous. She can give someone poison hours in advance but it kills them right at the perfect moment. Right when she can get away. And, once they are dead, she can change it back to something nontoxic. It’s flawless: not a single trace is left.”

“Great, boss,” Jesper said, growing impatient. “Can we talk about why we are here?”

Kaz frowned, “What, because you want to get Y/N out sooner? She’s in a terrible situation?”

“Exactly,” Inej pleaded.

“If I tried to save everyone in the Barrel I’d be broke by dawn.” Kaz said, looking back at his work. Inej and Jesper stood there in shock. “If you don’t have anything else to say…”

Inej placed a hand up to keep Jesper from exploding. “Kaz, you told us that you would help her escape.”

“I needed information, Wraith, you wouldn’t help me if I told the truth.”

Jesper spoke up, “So you lied to us? And what did you tell her?”

“Nothing. She’s prepared to leave the Emerald Palace tonight.” Kaz tsked. “I doubt she’ll make it two feet out the building without our help. Solves all of my problems.”

Without another word, Inej slipped out of the room, leaving the boys to fight. Through the walls, she heard muffled shouting.

“How could you? You act like you have nothing you believe in but really you are so terrible that you’ve made yourself your own Saint!” Jespers voice was desperate, filled with rage. The betrayal he felt was clear even though he was muffled. He sniffed. “Put too much faith in that saint and he’ll kill your friends.”

Inej cringed, hating the harsh truths her friend was sending toward her boss. She had always known partnership with Kaz would mean conflict, but it also meant freedom. She and Jesper often commented on their cold-hearted boss. “We are both too good for him.” Jesper would laugh as he said it, but now it seemed to be a reason to leave. But where would they go? When it came to Kaz Brekker, no one was better, and no one was worse.

One thing was for certain, Inej was not going to let her friend die. She had just pulled Y/N up from the grave, and she’d be damned if she let Kaz Brekker push her back in. If he was so certain the girl would be dead by tomorrow, she’d get to her before then. She didn’t have time for Kaz’s lectures and Jesper’s shouting. There was a life at stake. She begged the Saints to help her, but deep down she knew that this was up to her and her knives. If Inej couldn’t save Y/N, the Wraith would.

When she reached the Emerald Palace, a nauseous feeling spread throughout her stomach. She willed her hands to stop shaking, but the tremor remained. She reached the window after carefully checking her surroundings and gasped at what she saw. Nothing remained in Y/N’s room but a white letter and dark ash, both standing out against the gray stone floor. Inej frowned in confusion. So, she is gone. Where could she be?

Y/N was a smart girl, she could be out of Ketterdam by now. However, she had barely had any human contact and had been drugged and manipulated for years. If she was not already found by Pekka Rollins, she could have already been killed on the street. But no one knew who she was, and only Pekka and the Crows knew what she truly looked like. She had become one huge question.

Suddenly, Inej remembered something.. Specifically, a conversation she had with Y/N not long ago.

Inej, this might be the worst thing I’ve ever made. She had said, a fire in her eyes.

Then why are you smiling? Inej replied.

Look! Y/N had pulled a thin glass bottle of a swirling liquid and a small flower out from behind her back. She then poured a drop of the bottle on the flower, which disintegrated into a pile of ash within seconds.

Saints. Inej was amazed.

Wild, huh? Footsteps came from the stairwell in the corner of the room. Shit. Inej, go. Inej hesitated. Go! He’ll see you!

Now, looking at the large pile of ash on the floor of the room, Inej realized what had happened.

“Saints,” She whispered, tears forming in her eyes. “She’s drunk it.”

She heard footsteps approaching in the alley, and immediately grabbed two of her knives, ready to protect herself.

“Easy,” Jesper appeared, holding his hands out toward her. “It’s just me.”

Inej lowered her knives as she stared back at him. “We’re too late, Jes. She’s gone.”

He laughed, nervous. “No, she wouldn’t.” He lowered himself down to the window. “No.”

Inej stood up and looked up at the stars, praying to any Saint that she could think of that she wasn’t dead. That her friend was out there somewhere. Alive. “Jesper, we need to get out of here.”

“But,” Jesper paused, his voice weak. “She was just here.”

“She’s not anymore.” Inej looked at him with pity. She could tell how much the girl had meant to him. “I’m sorry.”

“She was just here.” He repeated, voice cracks littering his words.

Inej grabbed his hand, forcing him out of this frozen state. “I know, Jes. I’m sorry.”

#jesper fahey x reader #jesper fahey fanfic #jesper fahey imagine #shadow and bone fanfiction #shadow and bone x reader #six of crows imagine #six of crows x reader #jesper fahey x you

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jessiebanethedragon · 4 years ago

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White Sands Warm the Cold Sea

Star Wars, The Bad Batch Pirate!au (Hunter x Reader

Summary: the reader, betrothed to a disgusting Coruscanti Lord flees her home world and lands herself in a plethora of trouble, a ship of clones, and one pirate captain whose cold exterior needs much more than the tropical seaside sun.

Warnings: Swearing, takes place in time periods where women have dowery's and suchlike. The readers dad and bothered are asses.

Chapter one: The Sentencing

Fate, you had decided, fucked you over. Which in itself, was not only a very unladylike statement, but was also very ironic. But how fitting for a woman of your time, to want something her whole life only to be told she couldn’t have it by the most infuriating of men. For passion to be pushed into a corset and cinched into fake smiles and batting eyelashes.

Everyone has a value, never mind how little or much, everyone is worth something. And you are worth a great deal to me.

At the time you’d thought your fathers words were a statement of affection, love brought to light by goblets of rum only to settle in your lap as you tended to the fireplace and did your best to lead him into his bed, staggering every step of the way. It was now that you understood his words. The choice of word may have been valuable, but the more accurate synonym, dowry explained his true intentions.

Enter one Lord Volim Nython, a pretentious man with a mind that was far more shallow than his pockets and a reputation to match. What Lord Nython did not already possess, he bought. And what he was without currently, was a wife. He was a man with a personality inked in gunpowder and steel, crushing his enemies in the war that made his predecessors and your fathers fortunes.

A very fitting match. Oh how quaint, the wedding would be so grand, and the children, oh they will be beautiful. The distinct lack of sincerity infuriated you, older women with tea parties akin to that of toddlers and the gloved hands they rest on their chests as they shake their heads at the utmost ridiculous things. While the tautly curled hair stays perfectly in place, rage resided in you at an unfathomable height. But, it was not without its reins, and as its rider, you had to lead your rage onto a path that would result in your success.

You chose this night carefully, knowing that it was on the last of every month, when the money came in from gambling, debts and the crown, that your father quite literally liquified his earnings. You shiver in your nightgown, every fireplace in the house was still burning, and the oil lamps were flickering away, though the household was asleep save for yourself. The main doors shifted open as the intoxicated man made his way in. And you steady yourself before greeting him.

“A good night, I'll take it then?” You ask with a breath of a laugh, wrapping a shivering arm arm around his shoulders and leading him over to the plush sitting chairs by the fire. He waves you off when you offer him water and so you sit on your knees by his feet. Grasping his hands on your own. He regards you with a suspicious look.

“I… I wanted to ask you something.” You start carefully, eyeing his look. The rug is warm from the flame and the way it illuminates his face, you wonder how many times your mother sat with him like this, or how often he looked at her in such confusion.

“Well? Get on with it then.” He slurs leaning further back into the red velvet. Causing you to shift and bunch your nightgown.

“I wanted to ask if, if you thought, the lord...”

“Lord Nython.” He confirms, watching you jump as the fire crackles, your nerves electrified by what you mean to bring up next. And it gives away your intentions before you can ask them. After all, your father may know you better than you had originally thought.

“Do not tell me what I think you are about to do.” he warns tilting his head down so the orange light reflects the way he regards you through his brow.

“I think we could make a better match.” You try and appeal to his motivations. “I think we stand to make a better-”

“I’ve been given offers.” He interrupts, the liquor making him less angry and more level headed as you had intended it to. “No one will wed you for the price Lord Nython will.” He moves to stand, the conversation finished, but you are not, having given yourself a stern word of not settling until you are free from the man's clutches.

“There are richer men outside of Coruscant.” You say with more force than you had intended. The translucent fabric whooshing as you stand. Your father pauses at the helm of the stairs, like a Blurg righting itself after an unsuccessful charge, he is listening.

“Naboo royalty, even a low Alderanian Lord would double Nythons offer.” You take cautious steps forward, hoping that his underestimation of your intelligence works in your favor.

“Those men are oceans away, Nython will wed you tomorrow if the crown gave its blessing.” He counters, but it is not a dismissal.

“Consider this an investment then, the payoff would surely be worth it.” You press carefully, like a healer tending to an inflammation, you palpate the area with caution looking to avoid the most sensitive of the inflamed tissue. Your father huffs.

“Providing you could snag a suitable man.” Hope flickers within you, and it warms you more than the fire ever could, it makes you feel power, and control. And hope, like it does with most, makes you foolish.

“Love is a powerful motivator.”

His booming drunk laugh shakes you, fear flooding you as you realize your mistake. But you were so close! So tantalizingly close to being free from the wretched man.

“You think men marry for love?” You see him wipe away tears of laughter as he sways on the dark oak staircase of your home. “You my dear, are even more dull than I thought.” You shake with anger and anxiety.

“I want to be in love! Like you an-”

“Do not say you mother and I. Ha. You are truly delusional.” He interrupts, taunting you with drunken laughter. Your father never speaks of your mother, and when he did it was pushed aside in favor of something else. But alcohol has a way of loosening tongues.

“I… I-” you stammer, if there was one thing you remembered about your mother it was the love she shared with your father and the stories of growing up and falling into a love so pure with someone it made your heart ache for it.

“We were not in love, she despised me, and I her.” He spits from his place on the stairs. The height difference adds to how small you feel. How his pitiful stare shrinks you and sends chills into your bones.

“I do not under-“ He interrupts again:

“It was an act! Pretend! Meant to fool young girls into thinking they could have a life as such. And even in death she continues to lie to you!” You blink away tears and think, you try to think he is lying, that they were happy, she was happy, and that in his intoxication your father lies.

“She was adamant that we would be in love for you.” He sighs, and drops to the stairs to sit and lean on the railing. “That we would keep up pretences for your sake so that you would strive for such happiness.” With his words it is as if he is taking away the core memories of your mother.

“I will not marry that man.” You have to push the words out, but the meaning is clear enough.

“Yes.” Your father says ever so sternly. “You will.”

“I shall not!” You fight back, hating how your eyes cloud with tears and emotions bubble up. “He looks at me like one does cattle, I am nothing more than a trade deal to that man!” both parties know you are right, from the first meeting when he had stalked around you, looking up and down, tutting here, humming there. Not engaging in any conversation that you’d deem intellectual or interesting. You’d been disgusted then, and you are still disgusted now.

“Please!” Your father wipes drunken saliva from his chin, “Lord Nython is giving us so much gold for your hand in marriage you should be grateful, and a renowned war hero like himself. You will wed that man even if i have to drag you to the altar.” You’re stunned, and horrified, and your father leaves you weeping on the dark oak stairs, a mess for one of the maids to clean up before he wakes in the morning.

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