#to anybody who finished reading this entire thing: thanks omg
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I just finished Villains and I thought the ending was unneccessarily vague. I loved that these characters communicated by Shakespeare plucked from the air. It was hypnotic and real and I felt like I was in the middle of it. But the murder plot was lacking -- I didn't believe a moment of it. Richard wasn't really murdered and their guilt about what happened didn't make sense. It also didn't make sense that anybody would be found guilty of a crime, when James was so obviously protecting himself. The writing though was like butter. It was smooth and confident and warm. I wish the writer had focused more on the James and Oliver relationship because that was so special. -- Wherever James is, the notice of Oliver getting out would be in the news. I don't think Oliver will need to track him down.
omg hi thank you so much for the ask i feel so honoured!!! i have literally never agreed with anything more in my life. i feel like the ending was weirdly cliffhangery and should have been more clear or at least more definite. i love the way Shakespeare was integrated, especially since i'm a huge fan of his work - the way they spoke in quotes felt like a really cool way to build the world these characters lived in and it was also a super inventive way of foreshadowing (like James' sic semper tyrannis in a1s1). i agree that the actual murder wasn't really a murder, and it felt weird how they treated it even though in the minds of the characters (except for James) the group was entirely innocent and could have just gone to the police immediately and wouldn't be suspected of anything. but i can overlook the weirdness of that whole thing because it's so beautifully written - you're so right, it's like butter (i am absolutely stealing that description btw thank you). it has some of the most beautiful quotes i've ever read and i was so invested in the characters that the actual plot itself became almost irrelevant to me. and yes yes yes Oliver and James were my favourite part of the book - i called it from Oliver's first description of James but was certain i would be queerbaited, and i was so glad that wasn't the case. however i think i was happy ending baited (is that a thing?) because it felt like their love story was over before it even begun (which, i guess, it kinda was). however, on my second read of it, i noticed that their relationship was actually a lot bigger than i originally thought. the quote it's like I look at you and suddenly the sonnets makes sense is usually used by fans to try and say Meredith was Oliver's "main" romantic interest (which makes zero sense but that's a whole other story), but it's actually really interesting to note that Shakespeare's sonnets were actually about two main subjects - the "young man" (who is written about in a very loving, pure way, and the tone of these shifts about halfway through from friendly to decidedly not platonic) and the "dark lady" (who is written about with a mixture of lust and contempt). i think that dynamic very intentionally mirrors how Oliver feels about James and Meredith respectively. and on your last point - i definitely think that James would try to track Oliver down, otherwise there's no point in leaving the note! i doubt he would want to leave anything to chance. i read this book a few months ago and so all of my very strong opinions have been bottled up and have come out in this literal essay - i am so sorry for the infodump here lol, it's just such a beautiful book. thank you so much for asking me about this!!! you probably weren't expecting such an insane response but that's fine. lmk if u have any similar book recs bc i would love to read more like this. thank you again!
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HI !!! kpop asks 5, 8, 19 (mx), 26, 39 (>:D), 43, 53, 57 !! :D
omg hi chelle! so many questions wowow hahah iâm putting them under a read more bc i rambled a lot haha
5. Do you have a bias âtypeâ (ie, most follow a pattern like the main vocal/bad boy/leader)?
BRUH LOL yes i do OOF i had one bias type then it branched off into two when i started stanning changkyun LMAO so sad HAHAHA
bias type a: pretty, angelic church boy (donât ask... iâm not even religious lmao) vocalists (examples include: ukiss kevin, svt joshua, actor park bogum)
bias type b: deep-voiced, bad boy (?) rappers who KNOW theyâre hot (examples include: mx changkyun, oneus leedo)Â
iâm pretty sure there are probably more distinctions but those are the basics of my two completely opposite bias types LMAO to this day, iâm not sure how i went from kevin to changkyun LOL
8. Best friendship?
uhhhh idk what this means? LOL from context, iâm gonna guess best friendship among idols? in which case, i think monteen is definitely it LOL but i also adore svtâs and mxâs friendships within their respective groups as well like i believe all of them are soulmates and i just !!!!! love all of their dynamics. i also love love love ukissâ friendship. those boys hang out with each other so much and so clearly love each other even tho theyâre no longer in the same group ;u; basically i love my ults LMAO
19. Which member from Monsta X did you know first?
i think hyungwon?? bc of the memes LMAO or wonho bc of the fighter mv đłhonestly itâs kinda hard to tell bc when i started stanning svt, mx was always hovering in the background so i donât even remember when i learned all their names? LOL but i would say one of those twoÂ
26. Your opinion on aegyo?
I HATE IT LMAO iâve always found it cringey and i usually canât stand it bc usually itâs just secondhand embarrassment express. i think iâve been desensitized now bc of how goddamn long iâve been into kpop but i still am not the biggest fan. i think the only aegyo i can stand is jooheonâs (AEGYO KING) and wooziâs oppaya aegyo LOL other than that iâm like ....god why
39. Have you ever met an idol?
AHHHHH LOL yes i have, several times! i met ukiss back in 2014 and got to take a picture with them (which is in my header), and i met kevin again during his concert last year! i got to talk to him and hug him too and it was just AH AMAZING HEâS SO SWEET. i ALSO got to go to a hi-touch with 2AM back during kcon 2013 and i also got to go to a hi-touch with day6 in 2018 (i chickened out of greeting jae even tho i really wanted to go like HEY WEâRE FROM THE SAME HOMETOWN) i ALSO ALSO got to hi-touch with a.c.e last year and HARU JONGIL ALL DAY-ed with chan which was actually so fun! anyways i think thatâs about all the times iâve met an idol? which, now that i look at it, is a lot LOLÂ
43. How many groups can you name all the members of?
oh man thereâs no way i can count the number of groups. basically i can name all 2nd gen kpop groups, a bunch of nugu groups during 2.5 gen/3rd gen, any groups that went on the unit, and a fair amount of groups in 3rd-4th gen. i think around like 2017 ish? i stopped paying as much attention to new groups bc i got busy with college so iâm pretty unfamiliar with people nowadays. but honestly if youâre curious just throw a random group at me and i can try my hand at it LOL (also i know more boy groups than girl groups sorry ;;)Â
53. Your favourite lyrics?
OOOOOF THIS IS SO HARD. thereâs SO many good lyrics out there! but hereâs a few that i particularly love:
You get some right, you get some wrong. Even if itâs hard right now, youâll be smiling one day - U-Kiss (Someday)
Somebody let me know, tell me which way to go, âcause I donât donât donât know - JJ Project (Tomorrow, Today)
Good night baby, I wanna say youâll be fine. You donât need to walk alone. Reach your hand out to mine, wanna give you a new light - n1ve (new light)
Even if the world is not on my side, the standard they have for me is so heartless. But we have a dream, donât ever lose that. Letâs high five and wake up again, let it fly! - The Unit Orange Team (cover of BTSâs Butterfly) (this song always makes me cry. and the fact that jun wrote these lyrics thinking about ukiss..... a sobbing tonight)
Donât deny our r^2Ď - U-Kiss (0330) (IâM SO SORRY THIS LYRIC IS SO DUMB BUT I LOVE IT HAHAHAHA)Â
57. Favorite 3 iconic moments?
oh god only 3?????? thereâs too many omg. well iâll put some that come immediately to mind (links are included!):
1. in the first official ukiss activity since hoon returned from the army, hoon hugged soohyun and then soohyun tried to kiss him in return on live broadcast, and jun just sat off to the side, covering his face bc he was too goddamn embarrassed LMAO (and then soohyun sulked on twitter later asking if hoon didnât want to be kissed by him and hoon had to do damage control and say he did, he just got surprised LOL).... honestly ukiss is so wild i expected nothing less from them once they reunited haha (x)
2. seungkwan getting to live out his successful kissme dreams and dance bingeul bingeul (the song he auditioned with) with ukiss themselves. truly one of my favorite fanboy moments (x) (on a related note: i especially love this kissmecarat moment i technically started)
3. monsta x and btob cleopatra game. no words needed LMAO (x)
side note: i wanted to include a monteen moment but couldnât figure out which i wanted so i went with mxtob instead LOL but a few runner-ups were svt fanboying bc of showhoâs backs during the 2017 mama performance, svt dancing to shoot out during their fanmeeting, svt flooding the monteen group chat after mxâs 2018 mama performance, jooheon BAKSU, and mx reacting to svtâs hit LOL
#ask#chirrutbaze#thanks chelle!#answering all of these literally took FOREVER since you asked so many#but i had a lot of fun!#tho a lot of these put me in pain bc i didnt know what to choose#like for favorite lyrics i wanted to put some mx and svt and day6 and the rose#and top 3 iconic moments is utterly impossible LOL theres too many good ones#but i already rambled enough LOL#to anybody who finished reading this entire thing: thanks omg#this old kpop fan has too much to say
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Can i request #2 and 3 from the prompt list with Harry x Reader please but make it a happy ending? Thank you!!
A/N: Hi anon, omg this was so much fun to write!!! I love Harry and feel that there is not much Harry x reader content out there, so here you go! Hope you like it đ
âAnd then they lived happily ever after!â Cho finished reading as the girls around her squealed in excitement.
You merely snorted.
âWhy do all of your books have sappy endings?â you questioned Cho as she looked at you incredulously.
âWell, its fun to read.â Cho shrugged. âIf you were in Ravenclaw, you could be reading diverse romances instead of those stupid muggle books you like so much. For example, whatâs this youâre reading?â
She snatched your book and looked at the words youâd been reading.
âReal love is rare but fake words and promises are everywhere.â She read out before looking at you. âSee, this is why you feel so lonely, Y/N. if youâre gonna be reading miserable books like that, then I canât blame you for being droopy most of the time.â
âItâs not miserable, Cho.â You contradicted. âItâs a little something called reality.â
Cho snorted. âWhatever you say.â
âBesides, Iâm not always lonely.â You continued. âI have Hermione and Ron... and Harry too.â
âAnd Harry too!â Cho mocked. âBlimey, Y/N I forgot to ask. Howâs things between you two?â
At that you looked down. âI donât know what youâre talking about.â
Even though you werenât looking at her, you could almost feel her roll her eyes.
âYouâre lovesick, darling.â Cho explained. âYou get this weird glow on your face when you talk about him and your eyes form hearts like in those muggle comics you read. Also, when heâs around, you blush like a tomato. Tell me how this is incorrect?â
You sighed. âNone of your business, Cho Chang. So what if I like him? Iâm probably the 100th girl who does. He has a pretty wide collection of choices, you know. Take Ginny for example. Sheâs everything Iâm not. Sheâs pretty, popular, outgoing AND she is sweet. Iâm a loner, too sarcastic to have too many friends, and itâs not like I can help it anyway. Heâd never like me.â
âSweetie, what is there not to like in you?â Cho asked worriedly.
It was one of the many reasons you liked her, she always paid attention to your moods and constantly asked if you were alright.
âYâknow what Cho, letâs leave it.â You muttered. âI promised Ron Iâd help him with his essay anyway. Heâs probably eating in the common room. Bye.â
You gave a nod and walked off, but you could feel Choâs eyes watching you thoughtfully.
----------------
As you walked into the common room, a chorus of noises greeted you.
âFine, Iâll give you five galleons I can.â Harry was saying.
âAlright mate, whatever you say.â Said Ron.
âFive galleons you can do what?â you questioned, walking up to them.
Harry immediately coughed nervously. âAhem, Y/N! Hi! Ron here was betting I couldnât, er, sneak down to the kitchens.â
âIf you know Fred and George, doesnât seem impossible.â You said in amusement.
âSomeone summon us?â a voice called behind you as you turned to see Fred standing there.
âOh, yeah.â You spoke. âRon here thinks Harry canât sneak down to the kitchens, so he put five galleons on that. I was just explaining how anybody who knew you two could probably sneak off to Mars unnoticed.â
âWe are honoured.â George bowed to you. âBut Ron, mate, werenât you betting that Harry couldnât ask o-â
âNO, I WASNâT!â Ron bellowed, causing you to miss what George said.
Georgeâs expression immediately changed.
âHarry couldnât ask what?â you asked.
âThe house elves to make him some food.â Fred casually spoke.
You narrowly looked at him.
âBoys.â You finally muttered, going upstairs.
--------------------------
You were trying to wrench your bag out of the spot it had decided to get caught in, when a voice startled you.
âHere, let me help.â
You turned around to see none other than the Chosen One himself.
âOh, thanks.â You said nervously as Harry yanked the bag out of the door.
You grabbed it and turned to leave.
âEr, Y/N?â you heard Harry ask.
âYeah?â
âI was wondering if, um, youâd... y-youâd like to go to Hogsmeade with me?â Harry asked.
Your eyes grew wide. âAre you asking me out? Like on a date?â
âErm, yes.â He said.
âOh.â You managed to squeak. âOh, Oh! Um, y-yeah, alright, s-sure!â
He flashed you one of his stupidly adorable grins. âBrilliant!
----------------------
You and Harry had been dating for a few weeks now.
But something was terribly wrong.
Harry had started acting horribly distant, sometimes ignoring you or trying to walk past you in the corridors.
You were on your way to the common room. wondering whatever you could have done to upset him, when his voice caught you before you entered.
âRon, I canât do this anymore.â He spoke. âI know I agreed to your dare that I couldnât ask Y/N out, but I canât do this. Iâll give you your galleons, donât worry.â
âWell, alright mate.â You heard Ron say. âBut I thought you were happy-â
âIâm not.â
That was enough for you to choke a sob and run off to the deserted Quidditch Pitch.
So thatâs what it was.
A dare.
Harry didnât want to be with you, heck he didnât even enjoy it.
You kicked away stones in anger, remembering Choâs voice.
Real love is rare but fake words and promises are everywhere.
That was exactly what the past few weeks were.
Fake love, fake words, fake smiles, fake promises.
It was all fake.
Your thoughts were cut short, as a pair of shoes came skipping by.
âOh.â You heard a familiar voice.
No, go away, please. You thought. I hate you, donât come near me.
âHey, love.â Harry grinned.
You tried not to gag. âWhyâre you calling me that?â
He frowned. âD-do you not l-like it?â
âNo.â you coldly responded. âYouâre here to break up, arenât you?â
âWhat how did you-â Harry began.
'Is this what this whole relationship was to you? A bloody dare?â you asked through your tears.
Harryâs eyes widened. âYou heard...?â
âYes, I heard.â You said. âHarry Potter, donât you ever dare speak to me again.â
With that, you stalked off.
------------------------
Even though youâd convinced yourself youâd never speak to him, you couldnât help but worry about Harry.
The third task was near, and you were wondering if heâd make it.
Heâs made it this far, hasnât he? You thought. Heâll manage, stop thinking about him.
Sitting in the arena, waiting for him to emerge out of the maze, you couldnât take it anymore.
âCho... if heâs back, just let me know.â You informed the black-haired Ravenclaw, turning to leave.
Just as you turned, a cheer erupted as you whipped around to see Harry carrying something and lying face-front on the ground.
Everyone was cheering, but you squinted at what he was carrying, trying to make out what it was.
When you focused for long enough, your hands flew to your mouth as you let out a blood-curdling scream.
Cedric Diggoryâs body.
And it wasnât moving.
-----------------------
âIs he... can I see him?â you asked Madame Pomphrey.
âWell, Iâm sure heâs asleep, dear.â She answered, frowning. âBut in you go.â
You thanked her and went inside.
Harry was not sleeping, but he looked terrible.
âOh, Harry.â You sighed, walking to him.
Still not looking at you, he spoke. âYou still hate me.â
âNo, I-â you began. âI... I donât. Iâm sorry if I made you feel like that.â
âI should be the one apologising.â He said quietly.
You sighed. âIâll be late for Charms... see you soon, Harry.â
You bent down to place a kiss on his cheek.
At that moment, he turned his head abruptly, causing your lips to collide.
Gasping, you pulled back.
Entire body trembling with giddiness, you walked to your class.
--------------------
After your little âencounterâ, Harry went back to ignoring you.
You were sick of it, and one day, while he was returning from Hagridâs cabin, you cornered him.
âYou canât hide forever, you know.â You spoke seriously, arms crossed over your chest.
He didnât look at you.
Sighing, you stepped forward. âWe need to talk.â
His head snapped up to meet your eyes.
âThereâs nothing to talk about. I kissed you and you pulled away. End of story.â He casually said.
âNo, itâs not the end of story.â You snapped. âHow could you even, first you fake-date me and then this, I mean for Merlinâs sake Harry, a kiss is supposed to mean something and I-â
âWhat makes you think it didnât mean anything?â he asked softly.
You gaped at him. âYou said... you dated me because of a dare and then-â
âOh.â He interrupted. âOh. Thatâs why you were upset. Oh my god, Y/N, you totally misunderstood me. I... was talking to Ron because I felt that I wasnât being fair to you... I like you, Y/N. I truly do, and I wanted to date you as well, but I was worried what youâd think when Iâd explained it was a dare! And th-then I came to tell you all this, but you seemed so sad, I thought you hated me. Donât ever think like that, Y/N. That kiss meant everything it was supposed to.â
You remained silent.
Harry blushed and awkwardly scratched his neck. âUhm... and I-Iâd like to try that again...â
Your eyes widened as you turned red.
Swallowing your nerves, you leaned forward as he mirrored your actions and met you halfway.
And this time, neither of you pulled back.
#harry potter#harry potter x reader#harry potter x you#harry potter x yn#angst#harry potter angst#prompt#harry potter prompt#requested#thanks for requesting!
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bangtan headcanon: OT7 IN HIGH SCHOOL đâď¸
â genre; fluff, crack
â warnings; excessively stupid
masterlist u wanna talk to highschool!bangtan?
ăKIM SEOKJINă
class clown
always manages to sneak kimbap in class, and stuffs his face despite being in the front row.Â
heâs alarmingly good at sneaking food into places.Â
cafeteria ladies love jin so much.Â
and every christmas he brings in his perfected sugar cookies and never shares them.
(heâs in the cooking club)
((heâs the only one in the cooking club))
will interrupt the teacher to make a bad joke.Â
âyes so helium is the fo- oh yes seokjin?â
âi was reading an excellent book about helium, i couldnât put it down!! ahHAHAHHYUKHYUKAHHAHAHHAâÂ
nobodyâs?? really sure?? if heâs dating namjoon or not?? itâs the schools biggest mystery, thereâs currently a betting pool going on worth about $500
likes to annoy namjoon and yoongi about holding bake sales.Â
is surprisingly good at planning parties?? but never hosts them?? hoseok always gets him to plan his parties and he even planned prom!!
heâs particularly proud with the theme he came up with.Â
âzombie meets eleganceâÂ
it was actually pretty nicely pulled off (much to the shock of the entire student body)Â
ăMIN YOONGIă
student council presidentÂ
takes his job very!! seriously!!Â
fights with the principal on funding daily.Â
doesnât come to school without coffee and resting bitch face.
even the teachers are afraid of this short little emo boy.Â
is the only one who actually wears the school uniform properly with the little tie and jacket because thatâs how you show school spirit.Â
definitely that closeted gay in high school who thinks nobody knows about his homosexuality when in fact, everyone knows.
(nobody has the guts to bring it up to him though)
âhyung why are you staring at jiminâs as-â
 â-NO WHY GET BACK TO WORKâÂ
actually enjoys doing morning announcements.Â
âmake sure to check out jinâs dumb bake sale i think heâs selling brownies for some charitable reason anYWAYS time for minâs advice column!!âÂ
minâs advice column is yoongiâs free therapy. namjoon suggested adding an advice column to the school paper so now yoongi just judges his classmatesâs decisions gives subpar advice.Â
âi personally think you have no chance with this girl, but youâre clearly hell bent on asking her out. itâs a dumb choice. good luck.âÂ
ăJUNG HOSEOKă
fuckboy
throws obnoxious parties at his parentâs huge ass mansion.Â
somehow?? is?? the nicest? playboy??? evER??
will respect your girlâs boundaries but also would 300% hit on her when youâre not looking.Â
aftercare king wILL cuddle with you and help you clean up or whatever until jimin eventually comes in screaming.Â
his school id says âhobi đŚđ
â ... noone knows how he managed to do it (taehyung thinks he seduced the secretary)Â
surprisingly good at romance even though he deTests dating
âitâs a waste of time, money, and ass.â â- what?â
gives everyone dating advice whether they want it or nOt- he lives his *shhh very secret* romantic fantasies through his best friends.Â
once helped taehyung ask out his girlfriend... theyâre still going strong!!
defo has daddy issues that he never talks about,, maybe if a girl finds it sexcâ˘ď¸ in that kind of messed-up-bad-boy-she-could-fix vibe heâll bring it up
kinda failing science lmao he probably needs a tutor.. but will never admit he needs a tutor for sake of his pride.Â
most definitely has had sex in the janitorâs closet a couple times, up until yoongi caught him once, reported him to the school board and got him suspended... for a month.Â
(yoongi has no regrets, that was the best month of his life.)
ăKIM NAMJOONă
student vice president
honestly would probably be the council president and is the most qualified for it but canât be bothered.
plus he hates public speaking and the president has to speak at assemblies. Â
genuinely enjoys learning!! bUT HATES GROUP PROJECTS
because every single fucking time taehyung and jimin pester him about teaming up and he ends up doing like 75% of the work.
not because anyone forces him to or anything.
itâs because jimin and tae are such dumbasses every time they finish their work namjoon has a sudden uRGE TO REDO ALL OF IT BC THEY GOT IT WRONG.
tries to take all AP subjects.
gives up and drops half of them by the second semester.
great student but also will âno yoongi i donât want to fucking play basketball i've been awake for thirty hours trying to finish this goddamn essay thatâs due tomorrow. wHAT DO YOU MEAN WHY DIDNâT I DO IT EARLIER I WAS BUSY TAKING CARE OF MY BONSAI TREES.â
started the school paper!! itâs called âpersona postâ
writes about actual relevant things like political events and global problems, but everyone else just writes about school gossip *sigh*
although that one column examining hobiâs sex and dating life was a pretty fun piece of writing to read through.Â
he sits in the back of the classroom and never raises his hand even though he knows the answer like 95% of the time.
definitely has a crush on seokjin
ăPARK JIMINă
the one everyone has a crush on
and when i say everyone i mean everyone, even hoseok has had a crisis over park jimin.Â
(jungkook is definitely president of his fan club) ((in case it wasnât clear, heâs dating jungkook))
schoolâs golden boy, basically gets away with everything with a bat of an eye... and the most infuriating thing is he doesnât even realise it.Â
âomg jimin!! youâre so cute!! this shirt looks sO good on you, can i touCH?â âomg thank you i didnât think it fit well because itâs my boyfriends but thatâs so sweet!!â âboy... hm?â
mom friend: sweetest bitch alive and is always worrying about his friends but everyone knows heâs secretly really fucking kinky.
(again, jungkook has no comment)
the kind of person who celebrates christmas in june.Â
literally- he starts putting decorations in his locker and around the school mid june. by november, heâs wearing reindeer ears to school.
*lowkey kind of a nerd* genuinely enjoys studying with namjoon.
âwell, studying with anybody else is just too stressful!! plus, namjoonâs so chill. he doesnât look like it but he actually is super sweet and nice!!!â
â... please take those reindeer ears off, itâs embarrassing.âÂ
half of the school would probably cut off an arm to sleep with him. seriously, he gets offers like everYDAY itâs kinda getting tiRING
is considering starting a youtube channel where he just takes videos of all the dogs and babies he meets throughout the day.Â
âidk i think vlogging would be funâ
ăKIM TAEHYUNGă
art hoe
nEVER FUCKING STUDIES OR PAYS ATTENTION BUT GETS DECENT GRADES.
the definition of bisexual mess, WILL trip when he sees hot people.
exclusively wears wired gold glasses and soft neutral sweaters to school. if itâs a good day heâll wear a beanie. on special occasions heâll maybe throw in some fUN loafers.
dyes his hair to match ~the vibes~ of that season. the most recent wild hair colour is cool toned teal.Â
jungkook said he looks like leprechaun shit, but tae really likes it.Â
tried to go vegan countless times, failed each and every one when he passed by a mc donalds.Â
carries his sketchbook wherever he goes. he has that thing around 24/7, 100% would not be surprised if he slept with it under his pillow.
really quiet until he has a point to make;; like that time where he launched into a three hour screaming lecture on how phineas and ferb is an animated masterpiece.
drinks tea purely for the aesthetic of it.Â
goes to hipster coffee shops to pretend to study... ends up watching barbie movies and critiquing them on the writing blog that he thinks nobody knows about.Â
watches anime in class (he recently rewatched all of ATLA for the third time,, failed his econ class but worth it!!1!!1)
ăJEON JUNGKOOKă
preppy jock
once again, everyone is attracted to him, but heâs so whipped for jimin everyoneâs crush fades away once they talk to him because-
âoh itâs so cool that you have a dog!! you know, i think jimin kind of looks like a pomeranian sometimes itâs sO CUTE- hm? oh jiminâs my boyfriend.â
... itâs disgustingly adorable.Â
plays almost every sport and is somehow always the team captain. not out of obligation or with leadership skills or anything, everyone else just votes for him.Â
mess with his friends and heâll put a stink bomb in your locker.Â
his nickname is âgolden babyâ because heâs good at everything, teachers love him so much.Â
grades? sTELLAR. sports? heâs done them ALL. creativity? pAINTED THE SCHOOL MURAL. service? volunteers at a pet shelter whenever he can (the bunnies love him for some reason)Â
everyone either isÂ
a) in love w him, wants to fuck
b) jealous of him but is also secretly gay for him
pretends to not know how talented and cool he is and plays it off super cool
proceeds to fail, the only thing heâs bad at is humble bragging.Â
âwow omg lol i got a 100 on my bio test and yesterday i got a hole in one in golf, my first time playing it but itâs chill i guess hahhah day in my life amirite.â
**this headcanon is the start of the bangtan school series, stay tuned**
wanna be tagged in school series or my writing? here or send me an ask
#bts#kim namjoon#kim seokjin#min yoongi#jung hoseok#park jimin#kim taehyung#jeon jungkook#bts au#bts x reader#bts fluff#bts crack#school! bts#bts headcanon#bts boyfriend#bts imagine#bts scenario#bts smut#bts x you#bts angst#bts drabble#v#rm#jhope#jin#bts reaction
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Filter - Part 2
âThere are so many sides to him, itâs hard to keep track.â
fratboy/jock!Jimin x cheerleader!reader - e2l, smut, a n g s t, comedy, fluffÂ
Part of ficswithluvâs Bulletproof Bingo!
Rating: 18 (graphic sex and mature themes)
Word Count: 16.6k+ (sheâs a monster omg Iâm so sorry)
Warnings - bad language, humiliation (not during sex - he just embarrasses the hell out of her in public), alcohol, drug consumption, explicit discussion of sex, locker room sex, y/n being a brat again, jimin being a dick again (but worse,,,so much worse), dom!jimin, sub!y/n, teasing, oral sex (m and f receiving), fingering, tit fucking, tit slapping, Jiminâs monster cock makes a return, praise, explicit dirty talk, mild degradation, exhibitionism, semi-public sex, unprotected sex, standing sex, asphyxiation, y/n and jimin argue again (multiple times), Jimin is literally the worst human being on earth in this omg Iâm sorry for making him terrible, somehow I ended up putting a comment on society and the patriarchy (?) at the end but we go with it, girl power! and if your kpop boy is in this, heâs trash (unless heâs Stray Kids Minho, the only male character in this that deserves rights)
a/n: unedited lol and this really didnât go the way it was supposed to, but I donât hate it so here ya go, enjoy! I think in this lockdown, Iâve really started to,,,,hate men and it shows in this fic so Iâm sorry to any boys that might be reading this lmao. but anyway thank you to the loml @silverlightprincessâ for proofreading this, youâre the best hype girl ever, luv u xoxo (and I promise Iâll work on The Other Half for you and @brinnalaineâ ) lmk what you think of it, I legit thrive off praise lol x
Read Part 1 first !!!
also I got the banner off google so credit to whoever made it (it has no relevance to the story but it matches the colour scheme so we roll with it lmao)
silverlightqueen masterlist
âGood afternoon, everyone, and thank you so much for coming. We really appreciate the turn-out, and weâre super excited to see your try-outs! Today is going to be quite simple; weâll start by speaking to you one-by-one to see the range of movements that you can do. Not everyone on the squad has to be able to fly and tumble, so donât be worried if you canât do certain flips or jumps â we try to include people of all abilities as long as the raw talent is there, and youâll be able to learn a lot if you make the squad. Once weâre aware of what you can do, weâll group you into smaller groups and teach you a simple routine, a slightly different one for each group. Weâll watch you perform the routine as a group after some practice time, and then weâll assess your Cheer ability one by one, just a couple flips and jumps and things like that. If you really would rather not do them by yourself, thatâs okay. Just let one of the squad know, and weâll pair you with someone else who feels the same. We understand that some of you may not feel confident enough to perform in front of everyone else by yourselves. And itâs okay if you donât have much confidence, because thatâs something we will work on and help you to improve if you make the squad. Does anybody have any questions?â
Dozens of hopeful faces smile back at me, not one hand rising to ask a question, and I smile back. I was nervous about my first time doing this, speaking in front of everyone as newly elected Cheer Captain, but having the rest of the squad behind me makes me feel better. âOkay, great. If you could get into four lines in front of each of the seats at the desk, weâll get started!â I say excitedly. Irene, Jisoo, Chen and Jihyo (the most responsible people on the squad) are sat behind the desk to write down what people are able to do, the others on the squad dotted around to help if anyone needs it, and all the people here to try-out head over to the desk. I take a moment to take a deep breath, trying to calm my nerves, and I tilt my head back to feel the sun on my face. The weatherâs lovely today, warm and sunny with a slight cool breeze, perfect for cheer try-outs, and the turf of the pitch is healthy and green, not yet ruined by the studs on the bottom of the playersâ football boots (training doesnât start âtil next week).
ây/n, relax, babe. Everythingâs going well, you did a good job,â Jennie says from behind me, putting a comforting hand on my shoulder, and I nod. âYeah, I know. Itâs just⌠being Cheer Captain, itâs big boots to fill.â âI know, but youâve got all of us helping you out. You know weâre all here to support you. Stop stressing yourself out,â she says, and I turn to smile at her. âThank you, Jen.â âDonât thank me, because now Iâve got bad news,â she says, looking reluctant to speak, and I side-eye her. âWhat?â âWe have spectators.â âWe always have spectators.â âThatâs not what I meant,â she says, turning me to look over to the bleachers which are a few metres away. And when I spot a group of ASP boys sat there, watching us and waving when I look over, my heart nearly stops. âYouâve got to be fucking kidding,â I mutter, putting my hand up to shield my eyes from the sun and see them properly. And of course heâs there. Of course he is.
I havenât seen him since a week ago today, when I ran out of his room while he was fast asleep and did the most talked about âWalk of Shameâ at school in the past year. All week, everyoneâs been talking about me and Jimin, and somehow the rumours have spiralled out of control. My friends have reported back that theyâve heard that Hoseok and Namjoon joined us when they walked in on us, that I left before Jimin could finish, that I cried and begged him to let me cum (which my friends have denied on my part despite it being kinda true) and that I left wearing no underwear and flashed everyone on my way out. And thatâs not even the worst of the rumours. Iâve tried not to comment on it when people have asked me, and it seems Jiminâs stayed quiet too â Iâm sure it wouldâve been hot news if heâd said anything.
I woke up the next morning aching, my entire body sore and weak (I really have no idea how I managed to leave the frat house on my feet â it must have been the adrenaline). My neck, jaw and chest were covered in purpling marks, some of them in the shape of his rings, and my waist and ass were covered in dark painful bruises from his tight grip and the endless spanking (the marks and bruises are all still there, by the way, fading but there â I had to cake the makeup on top of them this morning to cover them in my skimpy cheer kit). It hurt to sit down for too long, but it hurt to walk too, so I spent all of Sunday lying down, Jennie nursing me back to health (as she calls it â in reality, she just microwaved some soup for me, and we binge-watched Netflix in bed together). My body isnât used to intense sex like that because not many university boys are as good at sex as Jimin is. I hate to admit it, but Iâve been zoning out all week (during lectures and seminars, when I was with my friends, at the gym, whilst studying or watching TV, when I was trying to fall in sleep, whilst showering, etc.) thinking back to mind. And I hate it â I hate him. I used to think of him with irritation and borderline rage, but now��� the thought of him turns me on. Itâs infuriating. I havenât even gone over to get my stuff â not even my favourite bra (it was sexy and comfy, lacy with no underwire) â for fear of falling back under his stupid spell and getting into his bed again.
When my eyes meet his, itâs like he knows that Iâm wet, a small smirk playing at his glossy lips as he runs a vascular hand through his jet-black locks, silver rings glinting in the sunlight. He looks fucking gorgeous, in a pair of loose black slacks and a loose orange shirt, a simple but flattering outfit, with his silver earrings, rings and bracelets. And the irritation inside me pushes down the arousal, and I turn away angrily, hearing their laughter over my shoulder as my eyes meet Jennieâs. âI can go speak to them if you want?â she offers weakly, and I sigh. âThereâs nothing we can say; theyâre allowed to be here. Weâre just gonna have to ignore them,â I say, and she nods, throwing an arm over my shoulders and leading me towards the table.
I oversee the proceedings, making sure everythingâs going well, my mind still elsewhere, but after a few minutes, the noise theyâre making is unbearable. Theyâre loud â laughter and shouting echoing around the pitch â and itâs starting to distract the squad, and the people here to try-out. âShould I go tell them to shut up?â Jennie asks, and I nod, reluctant to go over myself. She walks over, hands on her hips, and I know sheâs gonna give them hell. But then I start to doubt that when I see them laughing and joking with her, before she comes back over, my expectant gaze being met by her sheepish one. âWell?â I ask, and she winces. âThey said they donât take orders from me â only from⌠the Cheer Captain,â she says slowly, and I let out a noise of irritation. Jimin being an annoying, difficult, stupid dickhead, I can understand. The others? I thought they were my friends. But obviously they find this whole situation more amusing than anything. Itâs not funny for me â I slept with the guy Iâm supposed to hate the most! The guy that I do hate the most.
âI really donât want to go over there,â I admit, and Jennieâs eyes soften with sympathy. âYou donât have to, y/n, donât feel pressured. We can cope with their noise â itâs fine, babe,â she says reassuringly, but I feel guilty. I remember how nervous I was at try-outs, and having a group of rowdy frat boys laughing and shouting every few seconds definitely wouldnât have helped. Itâs up to me as Captain to create a comfortable environment, and with them around, this isnât comfortable at all. I sigh, shaking my head, before I say, âIâll go.â âAre you sure?â she asks, and I nod, dread building up inside me. âWant me to come with?â âNo, you just stay and keep an eye on things.â
I begin walking over, eyes fixed on the ground, and I can literally feel their eyes on me, their anticipation practically palpable. Everyone sat around the pitch is whispering, watching, desperate to see Jimin and I interact after all the rumours of the last week, and I can feel it all, making my nerves build up with every step. When Iâm a few feet away from the bleachers, I look up, my eyes instantly meeting his, and I stop, staring at them for a moment. Heâs endlessly amused, the smirk on his lips unbearably irritating. âHey, y/n,â he says easily, a ripple of laughter running around the group, and I donât reply, matching his light gaze with a hard stare of my own. âThis isnât funny, guys, and I wouldâve thought youâd know better. How do you think theyâre gonna feel when theyâre doing their routines and you morons are laughing? None of you can do what theyâre doing, not in a million years, so donât you dare come and sit here to rub my personal life in my face without even thinking of how rude and disruptive youâre being. You should be ashamed,â I say neutrally, not letting any emotion into my voice, because if I do, Iâll lose my temper completely like I did last week and end up screaming at them. The other boys have the courtesy to look embarrassed of themselves, but Jimin just continues to smirk at me, running his thumb over his plump lips. My insides churn with anger at him being such a dick, but I donât say a thing, waiting for one of them to reply. âSorry, y/n. We didnât think,â Jin says, apologetic, and the others mutter apologies too, all except Jimin. âDonât apologise. Just shut up,â I reply before turning on my heel, walking away and ignoring the indiscernible whispers and stifled laughter.
âWhatever you said, it definitely worked,â Jennie says, and I nod curtly, still pissed off. âYou okay?â she asks, and my shoulders slump. âNo. Iâm supposed to be the Captain, Iâm supposed to be nice and smiley and kind, and now Iâm just angry, because of them, because of him,â I sigh tiredly, and Jen looks at me sadly before putting an arm around my shoulders. âDonât let them get you worked up, babe â todayâs important, okay? Just focus on the try-outs,â Jennie says, and I nod, trying my best to let my annoyance go, but itâs easier said than done. I wait impatiently for the first part of today to be done, desperate to have something to do so I can distract myself. And as soon as the last person has finished speaking to Jisoo, I call for everyoneâs attention, telling them to start warming up. I sit down with Irene, Jisoo, Jihyo and Chen, and we quickly put people in similar-ability groups, based on the notes that the four of them have made whilst speaking to them; potential flyers, bases and spotters, and tumblers. The routines arenât too different â just to test their dancing ability, and to see if they have the kind of body control needed for their different positions.
Once weâve grouped them, Irene reads out the groups, the flyers with Lisa and Seulgi, bases and spotters with Kai, and tumblers with Momo, the rest of the squad supporting. I take a seat at the desk, making notes on people who catch my eye (theyâre all wearing little name stickers, so I send Jennie over to find out their names). Jiwon, the pretty sophomore from last week, is really good â her dancing is great, and sheâs light on her feet, the perfect flyer. Iâm already certain sheâll make the team, because sheâs super smiley and energetic too (I wave at her when I catch her eye, and she waves back excitedly, huge smile on her face). Watching them all learning the dances, making notes, evaluating them, it gets me in the zone. Focusing on this, Iâm in my Captain mindset, having completely forgotten about the stupid disruption earlier. Thereâs definitely some potential here, and I have no doubt weâll do really well at Nationals this year â Iâll be pissed if we donât come first (and Iâll also be the first Captain in ten years that doesnât lead us to victory, which is a pretty big deal).
Once theyâve learnt their dances, we split each group in half so there are less people to focus on, and they perform the dances to us. Theyâre all quite good â thereâs a couple people who, bless them, will definitely not make the team, and I feel bad, but I have to be ruthless. Itâs my job to make sure I give us the best chance at winning. We give them a little break after theyâve performed, and we all sit together to compare notes. Weâve pretty much all put the same people down, but we canât make any final decisions until we watch them do their Cheer moves. âOkay, is everybody ready?â I ask after getting their attention. âWeâre going to have a look at your moves now. So theyâre pretty basic, nothing too strenuous. Can someone show them what theyâve got to do?â I say, turning to face the squad, and before anyone can speak, Kai says, ây/n, you should. Youâre the captain after all.â I return his mischievous grin with a hard stare, but the others all give various agreements, pushing me to show them. âI havenât even warmed up,â I mutter, everyone laughing.
âOkay, weâll start with a basic standing split. So, you just lift your leg, whichever your better leg is, and bring it right up like this, with your arm in front of it, and hold it there for a few seconds,â I say, my left leg up against my body, my right arm holding my foot above my head. Itâs a little painful because I havenât warmed up, but Iâve done this move enough times that itâs pretty easy. I hear applause a little distance away, knowing itâs those stupid boys, and then everyone trying out starts clapping too, making me drop my leg and laugh embarrassedly. âOkay, thanks, guys, you can stop now,â I say lightly, and everyone starts laughing. I show them all of the other moves â a full split, a pike jump, a toe touch jump, a hurdler jump, a front flip, a back flip and an aerial, getting applause for each movement, triggered by our idiot spectators. âSo weâll call you up one-by-one, unless youâve asked us to go with someone else, and weâd like you to a show us a clasp, a high V, a T motion, and then go into the moves that youâre confident with. Show us your personality â we want bright and bubbly people on the squad, so donât be afraid to chant or whatever, if you want to,â I say as I take my seat behind the desk, Irene, Chen, Jihyo, Jisoo and Jennie sat with me, the rest of the squad sat around on the grass, enjoying the warmth and just watching the proceedings.
After a couple of people, it starts to get repetitive, but I remain focused, knowing I need to pay attention to differentiate between the good and the great. Jiwon is fantastic â sheâs making the team without a doubt. Once theyâre all done (nearly two hours later), I call them all over to sit beside the desk. âThank you all so much for coming, and well done. What you did takes a lot of courage and you should all be so proud of yourselves, whether you make the squad or not. Weâve got your details from earlier, so weâll be in contact within the next couple days to let you know if you made it. Thank you, and you are free to go,â I smile, all of them letting out expressions of gratitude as they get up, heading to the bleachers to get their stuff and go. âJiwon!â I call, the girl turning to look. âCan I have a word?â I say, the girl telling her friends to wait for her as she walks towards me. I head over to her, and we meet in the middle of the pitch, with no-one around. I donât want anyone to hear and accuse me of favouritism.
âHey, y/n.â âHi, Jiwon. You did a really good job, definitely shone through. Youâre fantastic,â I say, and she smiles shyly. âThank you. I have been cheering for a long time, though, so I did have an advantage,â she says humbly, and I wave it off. âDonât give me excuses â just accept the compliment. Anyway, I probably shouldnât say this, but you caught a lot of our eyes, Jiwon. Iâm pretty certain youâll make the squad. First practice is next Saturday, 2 âtil 4, and weâre just gonna do an introductory session, get to know one another and have a proper look at what everyone can do. Make sure youâre on time, and ready to try out some stunts. And work on your pike jump over the week â your fingers were literally millimetres away from your toes. A little practice, and youâll have it perfect. And you were the teeniest bit wobbly in your standing split, so just work on your balance a little,â I say, and she nods enthusiastically, taking in every word. Whilst Iâm speaking, I notice Jimin approaching us, and Jiwon does too, looking flustered when she spots him. But she sees the way I ignore him completely, and does the same, just listening to me.
âThank you, y/n, I really appreciate it. Also, can I ask for your advice about something?â she asks, and I nod, surprised she wants my advice. Jimin is now stood right beside us, but neither of us pay attention to his presence, keeping our eyes on each other. âWhat do you do to warm up for your splits? I warm up, but itâs always painful when I do them, and you did them really well, so I thought Iâd ask.â âI do a lot of yoga, actually, which really helps. We always get here around twenty minutes before practice, and the others do laps and things like that to warm up, but I do a bit of yoga, which helps loosen my body a lot. And then, just before I start a routine, I bend in half, and hold my head against my shins for like half a minute, to loosen my legs. Itâs a little painful, but it gets your legs ready for the stretch that you feel when youâre in the splits,â I say, and she listens eagerly to every word. His presence is starting to bother me, especially the way heâs completely silent, a stupid smirk on his face. âThank you, y/n. Iâm gonna head off now, but thanks for the advice. Are you going to KPNâs party tonight?â she asks, and I sigh, thinking back to the text invite that Jackson from Kappa Phi Nu sent out a couple days ago. âIâm not sure. I was gonna just head to the gym for a late-night workout but Jennieâs trying to convince me to go,â I explain, and she nods. âWell, I hope you do come. Itâd be nice to see you there,â she says, and I smile at her, touched. And then I lose my patience, turning to him with annoyance, and he grins, draping his arms around our waists.
âMy two favourite girls,â he says with a grin, making me want to slap him, and we both push his arms off us in disgust, moving away from him slightly. âLook at you two. Best friends now, huh? If it werenât for me, you wouldnât even know each other, so I think a âthank youâ is in order,â he says smugly, my eyes widening at him as Jiwon shoots him a dirty look. God, I love this girl. âFuck you, Park,â I say without thinking, and his eyes sparkle, mischief in his grin as he replies, âI already did, babe, keep up.â And then he reaches into his back pocket, pulling his hand back out with something black and lacy hanging off his finger. My favourite bra. âRemember? You left this?â âPark!â I hiss, grabbing it from his hand and panicking for a moment, not sure where to put it (my cheer kit doesnât have pockets) before I tuck it into his front pocket hastily. Itâs too late, though, because everyone in the area who was watching saw it, laughter rippling around us. âI wouldâve brought your pants too, but they were ripped, so I figured there was no point,â he says, and I give him an angry stare, jaw hurting from how hard Iâm clenching it. He just grins back, Jiwon looking between us for a few seconds before she says, âmy friends are waiting for me, y/n, so Iâm gonna go. I hope to see you later.â âOkay, Jiwon. See you. Remember to work on your pike jump, and your standing splits. If you get here early, we can do some yoga together,â I say, trying to push down the humiliation as the girl nods with a smile before she goes to join her friends who are watching us. Everyoneâs watching us.
âYour standing splits were good,â he says, and I sigh, rolling my eyes. âIâm literally giving you a compliment!â âI donât care, you fucking dick.â âWow, never mind. I was gonna say that I could put your flexibility to good use, but forget it,â he says, failing to hold back his grin, and I narrow my eyes at him. âWhy the fuck did you come, Park? I thought I made it clear last week that Iâm not interested in you,â I say harshly, hurt momentarily appearing on his face before he masks it with a smirk, making me feel a little guilty. âWe always come to watch try-outs. Entertainment for a couple hours. And it doesnât hurt seeing you in this kit either,â he says, taking the hem of my skirt into his hand, fingers momentarily skimming against my thigh, and I slap his hand away, feeling exposed in my kit all of a sudden. Itâs quite revealing â a short blue skirt with a white border and a long-sleeved blue cropped top with shoulder cut-outs, with our school name written across the chest in white. Itâs super cute though, even more so with the white pumps and frilly white ankle socks, and the blue and white bows on our ponytails. The boys wear the same colour scheme, blue and white t-shirts and shorts.
âI swear to God, Park, Iâm not in the mood for your bullshit today,â I say tiredly, and he pouts, eyes still sparkling with amusement. âYou were last week.â âThings change. You can go now,â I say pointedly, and he grins, taking a step closer to me, so close I can see every flaw on his face that he doesnât have, and places a gentle hand on my waist. âIâll go, but one last thing. Iâve gotta go drop my shit off in the changing rooms â Coach said we all have to, ready for next week â and Iâll wait in there for⌠hmm, shall I be nice? Okay, ten minutes. If I know you as well as I think I do, youâve been thinking about me, and what happened last Saturday, all week long. I have. And I want a round two. Iâll wait for ten minutes,â he says, voice low and face serious, before his whole demeanour changes, smile stretching his lips, hand falling from my waist as he takes a step back. My lips are parted and face warm, eyes locked with his, and my obviously affected appearance makes him let out a chuckle. âTen minutes, angel. If not, Iâll see you tonight, at KPN, and you can get your bra from me there instead,â he says with a smile, before turning and walking away, leaving me slightly stunned.
âClose your mouth, babe, youâll catch flies,â Jennie says drily, and I turn to look at her, trying to compose myself. âHe just asked me for a round two in the changing rooms,â I whisper, and she gasps loudly, catching the attention of everyone around us. âShut up!â I hiss, and she claps a hand over her mouth. âSorry, sorry. Iâm just⌠shook. Are you gonna go?â she asks, and I hesitate to answer, his dark eyes in my mind, my underwear embarrassingly damp. âI donât know.â âBitch, stop kidding yourself â you want to, so just go,â she says, but before I can reply, Kai joins us. âUm, y/n, there are a couple people waiting to ask you some questions,â he says, and I sigh, looking over his shoulder to see some people hovering. I quickly rush over to them, listening to their questions (which are so unnecessary, might I add? Why do you need to know where to get the uniform from, or the date of Nationals this year, if youâre not even on the squad yet?) and answer them as quickly as I can, trying to be polite, but impatient, worried that my ten minutes will run out.
As soon as the last personâs done, Jennie grabs my arm and whispers, âitâs been nine minutes. Iâll pack stuff up, you just go.â âThank you, youâre the best,â I whisper back. I rush off, speed walking across the pitch before someone can stop me, in the direction of the changing rooms. When I reach the door, I push it open slowly, listening out for any voices. And then I wonder â is this a prank? Is this payback for me leaving him last week? Are they all gonna be waiting there to jump out and laugh at me? But, no. He wouldnât. Surely, he wouldnât stoop that low? âJimin?â I whisper, hearing nothing back, and I venture in. âJimin?â I say a little louder, walking down the main aisle slowly, looking between the rows of lockers on either side of me. I call his name again, and when I reach the end of the lockers, stepping out into the open changing area, a wooden bench running around the walls, I feel a pair of hands push me up against the last locker, the metal clang echoing loudly around the room as I try to get my bearings, blinking to see Jimin stood in front of me, his body pressed up against mine.
âYou took eleven minutes, you fucking tease,â he whispers, hand appearing at my throat and tightening instantly, my mind momentarily thinking back to last week, when he left bruises the shape of his rings around my neck. âDidnât mean to. Got held up,â I breathe out, and he pushes my head back at an unnatural angle, his dark eyes, blown wide with desire, locking with my own. âHow can I believe you, after you left last week?â he spits out, and I feel my stomach turn; I didnât think heâd be that bothered, but itâs obvious heâs angry that I left him. âNever said Iâd stay,â I reply, with a small grin, and he growls angrily, pushing up against me even harder. âYouâre the first girl thatâs ever left without me telling her to. Trying to play me at my own game?â he asks, amusement creeping into his voice, but heâs mainly angry, veins corded tight and body tense, fist curled and jaw clenched. âNo. I just donât like you,â I reply, voice strained because of his hand tight at my neck, head beginning to go dizzy, and he lets out a humourless laugh.
âSure. Of course you donât. Letâs see how much you donât like me,â he says, free hand pushing one of my legs out wider, so he has space to put his hand up my skirt. His finger slides beneath my tight safety shorts, and he lets out a laugh when he feels how wet my underwear is, making me look away from him in embarrassment. âLook at me,â he demands, my eyes flitting back to his as he pushes my pants out of the way, swiping a finger along my dripping wet slit. I let out a shaky breath, and he chuckles. âI think youâre lying to me, angel. I think you actually do like me. A lot,â he grins as he pulls his hand from my skirt, lifting his finger, glistening with my arousal, to my mouth. I keep my lips pressed shut, and he raises an eyebrow. âDonât make me punish you. This isnât a repeat of last week â thereâs other things I want to do to you,â he says lowly, a thrill running through me, but Iâm still as stubborn as last week. âIâm not here for a round two. Iâm here for my bra,â I exhale, and he rolls his eyes with a little laugh, his hand tightening at my neck. âYou can earn it.â âWhat is it⌠with you stealing my⌠things?â âI didnât steal anything. You left your bra when you did your little walk of shame. So itâs mine now â itâs been in my room for a week, with your tight jeans and your pretty top and those cute heels, and that little bag, with your keys and lip-gloss and pads in it. And because itâs all mine, I want you to earn it back,â he replies before leaning down and pressing his lips to my ear, his beautiful scent flooding my senses.
âLet me fuck your tits,â he whispers, making my stomach clench with the thought of it, before he pulls back from me, searching my face for any kind of reaction. âAnd they say romance is dead,â I whisper dryly, and he laughs, a startled laugh, as though he wasnât expecting a joke from me. It makes my heart flutter a little, which then makes me want to slap myself. âIs that a yes?â he asks with a mischievous grin. âNo. It isnât,â I reply, and he sighs before letting go of me. âFine. Letâs just talk then, if you donât wanna fuck,â he says neutrally, sitting down on the bench opposite me, and Iâm disarmed at his sudden 180. âSit down, y/n,â he says, motioning to the bench and, for once, I listen to him, sitting down. He leans back against the wall and runs a hand through his hair, legs spread, thick thighs on display. Last week, the lighting from his bedroom lamp was low and sultry, but the lighting in here is bright and cold, and he still looks fucking gorgeous.
âWho did you tell?â he asks, and I know heâs asking what Iâve been wondering all week â who actually knows the full story. âWho did you tell?â I ask, purposely being difficult, and he rolls his eyes, grin pulling at his lips. âHobi and Tae are the only ones that know the full story. Jin, Yoongi, Joon and Kook know vaguely. Now tell me who you told,â he says, and Iâm surprised heâs kept it only to his closest friends â I thought for sure the whole frat would know. ây/n. Who did you tell?â Nayeon, Lisa, Mina, Irene, Dahyun, Yeri, Jeongyeon, Seulgi, Sana, Jisoo, Chaeyoung, Joy, Momo, Wendy, Jihyo, Tzuyu and- âJennie.â âThatâs it? Just Jennie?â âAnd.. a couple of the other girls.â He raises an eyebrow, obviously not believing me. âDid you tell them everything?â âOnly Jennie knows about me leaving when you⌠wanted me not to,â I say, and he nods, looking a little embarrassed, and I feel so guilty, but I had to. âWhy did you do it?â he asks quietly, and I take a deep breath, closing my eyes for a moment. âBecause⌠weâre supposed to hate each other, and we had sex, Jimin. I couldnât share a bed with you after that, I just⌠couldnât.â âWould it really be so bad if we didnât hate each other?â he asks, and I sigh, not wanting him to ask these questions, not wanting him to entertain this possibility. Because Jiminâs the type of boy to want what he canât have, and as soon as I let him have me, more than just physically, he wonât want me anymore.
I get up and walk over to him, his eyes on me, and when Iâm stood right in front of him, in between his legs, I drop to my knees. ây/n,â he says slowly, as though he wants me to wait, but I canât talk about this right now. âShut up,â I say before pulling my top over my head and throwing it behind me, leaving me in my bra. Heâs quickly distracted, eyes lost in my chest, and I can see the bulge in his jeans growing already. I lift a hand to his crotch, palming him over his jeans, and his head falls back, a little moan falling from his lips. âPlease, y/n, donât tease,â he breathes out, and I clench involuntarily at getting him like this. âTake your jeans off,â I whisper, and he quickly unbuttons and unzips them, holding himself up from the bench and pushing them down with his underwear, just enough to free his cock. Heâs only half-hard, but heâs already big, girthy and long, making me lick my lips at the sight of him. He tugs on his length a couple times to get himself fully hard, letting out little grunts, and I feel more arousal dampen my underwear. After a few seconds, I push his hands away, taking his length into my hands, and he shuffles forwards on the bench, giving me proper access to his cock.
I collect my saliva up on my tongue and spit at his dick, the saliva landing on his tip and slowly dripping down his length. I use my hand to spread it out before I take his swollen head into my mouth, kitten licking the tip before swirling my tongue around him. He pulls my bow out of my hair and grabs my ponytail, but restrains himself from trying to control my movements, letting me take my time with him. I donât wait long before Iâm taking him as far into my mouth as possible, before slowly bobbing my head up and down his length. âGod, angel, your mouth is so fucking good. So good for me, such a dirty girl,â he praises, head back against the wall but eyes on me, and when I look up at him through my lashes, he grins down at me. I hollow out my cheeks, trying to get my lips around the base of his cock, but my jaw is already hurting from my mouth being around his thick length. âGet me all the way in, baby, I know you can,â he prompts, and I try my hardest, gagging around him, and itâs so fucking messy, saliva around my mouth and dripping down my chin. He decided to help, pushing my head even further down, and when my nose hits his skin, his abdomen contracts, a heavenly moan of my name falling from his lips.
Once I deem his cock sufficiently wet, I remove him from my mouth and reach behind me to unclasp my sports bra, pulling it off, feeling satisfied when his eyes are locked on my breasts. âStand up,â I say, and he does so, quickly, moving aside to let me sit on the bench. I perch on the edge, knees together, and Jimin stands in front of me, one leg on either side of mine. âPush your tits together for me, angel,â he says, and I do so, the boy moving even closer to me. I feel his head against the bottom of my breasts, wet and hard, before slowly pushing up, breath catching in his throat as he goes as far as he can, his pink tip emerging through my cleavage. âFuck, that feels good. Hold them tighter, babe,â he says, and it starts to hurt when I do so, but the pleasure on his face as he thrusts, fucking my tits aggressively, more than makes up for it. I spit down into the valley of my breasts, for better lubrication, and he lets out a moan, thrusting even harder. And then he lifts a hand, landing a slap on one of my breasts. âUm, ow,â I say, and he lets out a little chuckle, his thrusting not faltering for a moment. âSo soft. Best tits Iâve ever seen,â he says, landing a slap on the other, and I stop myself from slapping his balls because I donât want to kill his vibe. And heâd probably enjoy it, the kinky bastard. I look down to see precum leaking from his tip, and I lean down, meeting one of his thrusts with my tongue, licking his precum, and he lets out a moan. âGod, yes, baby. So good for me,â he grunts, before his thrusts start to slow, until he eventually moves away from me.
âLove your tits, angel, but I wanna cum in you instead,â he says, grabbing my hand and pulling me up from the bench. âPut your clothes back on,â he says, my eyes widening in confusion. âWhat? Why?â âBecause Iâve always wanted to fuck you while youâre wearing your cheer kit. Hurry up and put it on before I decide to leave,â he says pointedly, and I feel guilt surge through me as I grab my bra from the floor, pulling it back on, and turning around for him to clasp it for me. He does so, taking ages (it seems heâs better at taking bras off than putting them on), and then I pull my top back over my head. As soon as Iâm redressed, he pushes me up against the nearest locker, winding me, before his hand strays down to beneath my skirt. âYou gonna take these booty shorts off before I rip them off you?â he says, plump lips against my neck, and I push him off, quickly pulling off my safety shorts (these are the only pair I have at the moment â I ordered a pair online and theyâre due in a couple weeks â so I really donât need him ripping them). âTheyâre safety shorts, not booty shorts,â I mutter, as I kick them off, and he doesnât waste any time in pushing me up against the lockers again. He presses his lips to mine in a tame kiss (he doesnât even use his tongue), mouths moving together for a few seconds before he pulls away, sinking to his knees.
âYouâve been on your knees for me twice now, baby, so I think itâs time I repaid the favour. And I believe I promised to eat your pussy with my⌠pretty lips,â he says, quoting my words from last week, and my stomach turns as he grabs the front of my underwear. He violently pulls at them, tearing them away from my body, and I refrain from kneeing him in the face for ruining a second pair of pants. He pushes my legs apart before pulling one over his shoulder, his face inches from where I need him. âJimin⌠please,â I whine, and he chuckles, expelling warm air across my dripping wet core, making me shudder. âSee, baby, youâre being so good for me today, saying my name, and begging like a good girl. And good girls donât get punished, donât get spanked until their ass is raw. Good girls get rewarded,â he says before his head disappears beneath my skirt and I feel him lick a slow bold stripe across my slit, my hips jerking at the feeling, pushing my core closer to his face. He swirls his tongue around my clit, and I let out a whimper of his name, making him chuckle as he grabs onto my waist to hold me in place. âSo fucking sweet, angel. Best pussy Iâve ever tasted. Could eat you all day.â He laps at me like thereâs no tomorrow, my hands gripping onto his strong shoulders and head thrown back against the lockers. He brings his fingers to my clit, rubbing slow circles, at the stimulation at my bundle of nerves paired with his long, quick licks have me moaning out his name, my stomach already tightening with the threat of an orgasm.
And then he pushes a finger between my folds, pumping in and out of me as I clench around him. âGotta stretch you out for my fat cock, baby, take it like a good girl. Stop clenching, babe,â he murmurs soothingly against my inner thigh, his thick finger quickly being joined by another. âAh, Jimin, feels so fucking good,â I moan out, and he hums in response before attaching his lips to my clit, sucking at the bundle of nerves before adding another finger, three thick digits stretching me out. âSuch a good little slut for me, angel. You take my fingers so fucking well,â he says, lips still against my clit, and I feel my high nearing quickly, moans and whimpers escaping from my lips every few seconds. Heâs so good with his mouth, his plump lips wrapping around my clit and sucking harshly, before he licks along my folds, fingers still pumping into me, curling against my spongy spot every few seconds, bringing me closer and closer to the edge. And he knows it, the pace of his fingers ever increasing, his lips and tongue attacking my core with passion.
And then we hear the door of the changing room open, followed by a group of loud male voices, laughing and joking. Before I can even register it, Jiminâs on his feet, scooping me into his arms and practically sprinting into the shower area, rushing into one of the cubicles. He puts me down carefully, a hand over my mouth, and I feel my orgasm fading away because of the fear of being caught by his teammates. And in my mind, the logical thing to do is to be silent and wait for them to leave, right? But Jimin isnât logical, and he pushes me up against the brick wall, pumping his cock in his free hand. He removes his hand from my mouth, tapping my left leg before tapping his shoulder, and I get the message, putting my leg up over his shoulder, despite thinking that this is a terrible idea. And then he puts his hand back over my mouth before slowly sliding into me, his huge cock stretching me out painfully, filling me up completely, and it takes every ounce of my self-control not to moan out his name, my head falling back against the wall with a dull thud. âWhat was that?â I hear one of the boys say, the others asking what heâs talking about, and I feel panic fill me. But along with the panic is arousal at the idea of being caught, my pussy gushing around him, and he smirks, slowly thrusting into me, the curve of his dick allowing him to hit my g-spot (Iâm certain Megan wrote Captain Hook about him).
I hear footsteps nearing us, before they stop abruptly. âOh, my God,â I hear a voice say quietly, before more footsteps can be heard. âWhat?â âLook.â âWhoa. Is thatâŚ?â âYes. One of the cheerleaderâs bows.â Panic strikes through me, and Jimin just grins, continuing to fuck me slowly, making me feel every inch of him. âAnd those are the shorts they wear, right?â âYeah.â âAnd are those⌠pants?â âYep. And they look ripped.â âIs someone fucking in here?â âNo, weâd be able to hear them. Theyâre probably gone.â âYou think?â âYes. And I donât wanna double check. Letâs just go.â I feel my fear ebbing away as the footsteps get quieter before the door opens and closes. Weâre both silent for a few moments, just to make sure theyâre gone, before Jimin pulls all the way out of me, slamming back in. I let out a loud moan against his hand, which he moves to rest at the base of my throat, cock hammering into me ruthlessly. âLook how wet you are for me, baby. My little bitch likes the idea of getting caught with a fat cock inside her, huh? Does the idea of being walked in on turn you on, babe?â he asks, and all I can do is nod, moans falling from my lips every few seconds as he slams into me, the drag of his cock against my walls making me weak.
âTaking me so well, angel, letting me fill you up and stretch you out so good, baby,â he praises, voice strained with effort, as he pounds into me, my mind completely blank of anything, of everything but him. I feel my orgasm nearing, my walls clenching around him, but that doesnât stop him plunging into me, hard, his balls slapping up against my ass, one hand gripping onto his shoulder whilst the other is splayed against the cold wall. My leg is beginning to hurt being up against his shoulder, especially because all my body weight is resting on the toes of my other foot (I canât get my whole foot on the floor), but he seems to be enjoying it, able to go deep into me at this angle, his tip hitting my cervix. âLook how flexible you are, baby, stretching for me like a good little whore. Gonna put your flexibility to good use all the time, babe â Iâll help keep you in shape for Cheer,â he promises, fingers straying to my clit as he speaks. And then I feel him twitching inside me. âAre you close?â I ask, and he nods, eyes fluttering shut, and I reach down to cup his balls, trying to push him over the edge. âAh, fuck, feels good, y/n, your pussyâs so fucking good. Gonna cum, gonna fill you up like a good little slut,â he breathes out, and I tighten around him, his head falling back as he lets out a loud moan of my name, hot cum shooting out of his cock, painting my walls. He continues thrusting, hips stuttering as he works himself through his orgasm, and I stay clenched around him to prolong his high.
Once heâs done, he pulls out, and puts me down carefully, taking a moment to get his breath back before tucking his softening cock into his underwear, zipping himself back up. He looks up at me with a grin, his hair messy, face still glistening with my arousal, eyes dark. âGood talk,â he grins before turning and walking away. âUm, Jimin?â I call after him, stepping out of the cubicle with shaky legs. âYes, y/n?â he asks, turning to look at me, eyes sparkling with mirth. âI didnâtâŚâ I trail off, unsure of what to say. âWhat? You didnât cum?â he asks, and I nod, my stomach twisting with hurt when he smirks and says, âI know, angel. Only good girls get to cum. And good girls donât leave in the middle of the night after being asked to stay.â My mouth drops open at the thought that heâs not going to make me cum, and he grins even wider, before taking a little pity on me. âIâll tell you what, baby. Come to KPN tonight and come find me, and Iâll make you cum as many times as you want,â he says, but Iâm still furious. âYouâre not being serious?â âDeadly.â âJimin, please,â I say, and he just grins back at me. âYou might wanna clean yourself up. Got my cum dripping down your leg,â he says, and I look down to see his thick white release slowly trailing down my skin. I curse under my breath, and when I look back up, Jiminâs already out of sight, whistling a merry tune, before I hear the changing room door open and close behind him. And when I slowly walk towards the lockers, I realise my bow, safety shorts and ripped pants are gone too. And he still hasnât given me back my favourite bra.
I head over to the sinks to clean myself up, cursing at him the entire time. âFucking bastard, and his stupidly big fat fucking cock, stealing all my stuff and leaving me high and dry with his fucking cum dripping down my fucking leg. Didnât even give me any fucking aftercare, fucking dick,â I rant angrily as I take my hair out of its messy ponytail, running my fingers through it. Luckily, I havenât sweated off any of my makeup, the fading marks from last week fully covered, but itâs still clear Iâve just been fucked. And the fact that I donât have anything on under my skirt isnât helpful at all â thank God it isnât windy today because otherwise, Iâll be flashing everyone. Once Iâve deemed myself okay to leave, I push open the changing room doors, looking side to side to make sure no oneâs around before I slip out of the door, quickly making my way to mine and Jennieâs accommodation, trying to ignore how desperate I am for a release right now. And not just any release â one on Jiminâs cock. But thatâll have to wait for later â Iâve got a party to get ready for.
âJennie! y/n!â Yeri exclaims when we walk into the kitchen through the back door, throwing her arms around us in a hug. âHey, Yeri,â we reply, hugging her back, and when she moves away, her eyes widen. âJen, you look good, but y/n! You look good, girl!â she exclaims. âOh, thanks, Yeri,â Jennie says sarcastically, but she doesnât mean it â Jennie always opts for comfort over fashion at frat parties, usually wearing mom jeans, or a loose t-shirt dress (which she rocks by the way â no one pulls off the casual aesthetic like Jennie). And I never dress up too much, sticking to a simple outfit and dressing it up with heels and jewellery. But today, I decided to go all out, dressing to impress in a tight little black dress, hem around my upper thighs, ruched with a bardot neck (I had to forgo a bra, and used tit tape instead to make sure they donât sag). Iâm in a pair of black sparkly heels, much higher than last weekâs, with a silver choker, silver hoops and a thin silver bracelet. Jennie has on a shoulder bag, big enough to fit my things in it, so I didnât bother with a bag, my phone in my hand and my lipgloss, oil blotting sheets and keys in Jennieâs bag. âThanks, Yeri. But look at you! This top is so cute!â
We greet all our friends, Jeongyeon pushing cups into mine and Jennieâs hands (Iâm not sure what it is but it tastes nice), before I take a seat between Tzuyu and Lisa at the kitchen island, instantly getting into a conversation about Cheer. KPN parties are always really laidback â people wear whatever they want, drink whatever they want, and I never feel uncomfortable here, or pressured to act a certain way. I can just be myself, and enjoy the night with my friends. ASPâs the opposite in the sense that thereâs always pressure â to look good, to end the night with someone, to give everyone something to gossip about.
ây/n! You came!â Jackson exclaims when he sees me, pulling me into an expensive smelling hug. âHey, Jackson!â âI was about to make a comment about how late you are, but you look really good, so Iâll let you off,â he grins, and I roll my eyes. âSince when do you have to arrive to parties at a certain time?â âYou wouldnât know, y/n, youâre always fashionably late,â Tzuyu teases, and I cover my face with embarrassment â never have I arrived at a party before my friends (thereâs just something about being there before the party has properly started that makes me want to cringe). âAnyway, what are you ladies drinking?â âDiet Coke,â Tzuyu says as she holds her cup up, Lisa drinking the same. âIâm drinking whatever the hell this is â Jeongyeon gave it to me,â I say, and Jackson takes the cup, sipping from it, before his eyes widen. âYo, this shit slaps. Whereâs Jeongyeon? I want some,â he says, turning away in search of her, and I call after him, âget me some more too, please!â
âSo⌠y/n,â Lisa says with a knowing grin, making me raise an eyebrow at her. âYes?â I ask, she and Tzuyu exchanging an amused glance. âThis dress is nice,â Tzuyu says with the same knowing look as Lisa, and I look between them suspiciously. âThanks,â I say slowly, their smiles widening even more. âWho are you dressing to impress?â Lisa asks, and I realise where this conversation is going, letting out a laugh. âAh, you two. Can a girl not dress for herself?â I grin, both of them raising their eyebrows. âOf course. But the timingâs a little suspicious. Not hoping for a round two, are we?â Tzuyu asks, and I bite my lip embarrassedly. âWhat if we already had round two?â I say quietly, both of their mouths falling open. âWhat?â Lisa exclaims, drawing the attention of those around us, and I shut my eyes despairingly. âKeep your voice down, stupid!â Tzuyu exclaims, Lisa murmuring an apology, still looking at me with wide eyes. âWhen?â âEarlier, after practice. I met him in their changing rooms,â I say, both of them looking even more shocked with each word. âOh, my God! You two are, like, stuck in your own little forbidden and scandalous romance!â Lisa whispers, and I shoot her a hard look. âItâs not a romance. Heâs still, like, the most annoying and stupid person Iâve ever met. I mean, he literally left without making me cum, on purpose. He said if I showed up here tonight, heâd make it up to me,â I whisper, both of them gasping quietly. âNo way!â Tzuyu says, and I nod. âSo youâre gonna have a round three?â Lisa asks, and I shrug. âIâm actually not sure. I donât know whether I came so that I could leave with him, or so that I could piss him off by getting with someone else,â I say, both of their eyes lighting up. âGet with someone else,â they chorus, and I let out a gentle laugh.
Before I can reply, Jackson reappears with two cups in hand. âItâs Fireball Whisky with cream soda,â he says, and I blink in surprise, not sure whether to be impressed or disgusted at Jeongyeonâs weird concoction. He takes the empty cup from my hand and hands me a new one, and I thank him as I take a sip. It really is good, and I know I need to be careful not to drink too much â Iâll forget just how strong whisky is and then find myself hunched over the toilet in a few hours, vomiting it all back up. âAre you guys gonna just sit here and chat all night? This is a party! Weâre supposed to be having a good time,â Jackson says, and I exchange a glance with the girls. âWe are having a good time,â Tzuyu replies mildly, and Jackson rolls his eyes. âSo youâre not gonna come dance?â he asks, and we all shake our heads. As much as I do love getting lit, itâs nice to just have a gossip with the girls sometimes. âMaybe later,â I say, and he frowns, shaking his head. âYou guys are boring.â âGo find Joy, sheâll dance with you,â Tzuyu suggests, and Lisa nods before adding, âand Dahyun. Come find us in a couple hours, and then weâll dance with you too.â
Jackson quickly disappears, calling out for Joy and Dahyun, and the spot where he was stood is quickly occupied by a boy who I recognise as Chan, one of the boys on the team and a KPN brother. âHi, Chan,â Tzuyu says, the boy giving us a smile. âHi, guys. Youâre all cheerleaders, right?â he asks, and we nod, confused as to where heâs going with this. âDo you wear these, like⌠little black shorts under your cheer outfits? Like super small, tight, black shorts?â he asks, and I realise, dread flooding through me as we all nod. âTheyâre called safety shorts,â Lisa says, and Chan nods. âI thought so. We saw a pair earlier, in the changing rooms, with one of the bows you guys wear, and some⌠underwear. Ripped. So I was just⌠curious, I guess,â he says, Tzuyu and Lisa both turning their gazes to me. âUm⌠Chan, Iâd be really grateful if you didnât mention that to anyone,â I say embarrassedly, the girls stifling laughs as Chanâs face falls with shock. âOh! They were yours?â he asks, and I nod, totally humiliated. âWho was, um, with you when you came in? There was just a couple of you, right?â I ask, and he winces. âThere were a few of us, actually. But itâs fine, Iâll tell them not to mention it to anyone. Your secretâs safe with us, y/n,â he says with a grin, and I give him a weak smile. âThanks, Chan.â âNo problem. Before I never mention it again, I just have one question,â he says tentatively, and I close my eyes briefly, nodding as I brace myself. âWere you⌠in there when we went in?â he asks, and I take a deep breath before nodding, his eyes widening. âIn the shower cubicles, right?â âYep.â âI thought I heard a banging noise,â he says, and the girls burst out laughing. âNo, no, itâs because I hit my head on the wall,â I explain over their laughter, even more embarrassed now. âSorry,â Chan says, and I wave it off. âItâs fine, itâs my own fault for fucking in a public place,â I say bluntly, and he lets out a gentle laugh.
The girls are still laughing when Chan leaves with the promise of never mentioning it again, and I shoot them dirty looks. âAre you gonna stop laughing any time soon or should I just go?â I ask venomously, and their laughter gets even louder, making me roll my eyes. âFine. Iâm going,â I say, pushing myself off my seat and leaving with my phone and drink in my hands, their laughter continuing behind me. I decide to venture into the living room, but regret my decision the second I walk in and lock eyes with Hyunjin â Chanâs whispering something to him, and he bites down on his lip when he sees me, obviously holding back a laugh at the irony of seeing me as Chan fills him in. I turn on my heel, instantly heading back into the kitchen and ignoring Hyunjinâs loud laughter behind me. But when my eyes meet Lisaâs and she bursts out laughing again, Tzuyu laughing too, I make a decision â I want to go home. I know none of them mean anything by it but itâs really⌠getting to me. I donât like that nearly every conversation Iâve had in the last week has come back to Jimin â in fact, I hate it. Iâm more than my sexual escapades, whether or not theyâre with my worst enemy. I came here to have a good time with my friends tonight â not to speak about my sex life.
âMark,â I say, catching the boy beside me offguard. âOh, hey, y/n. You okay?â he asks, and I nod. âIâm great. You?â âIâm good, thanks. Whatâs up? You look⌠stressed.â âIâm okay, I just⌠have you seen Jennie?â I ask, and he nods, taking me by surprise. âI saw her go out the back door a couple minutes ago, with Seulgi and Nayeon,â he says, and I grin at him. âThank you, Mark, youâre the best!â I exclaim, not giving him a second to reply before I quickly head towards the back door, ducking through the doorway before anyone else can speak to me. Thereâs a group of boys stood near the door, passing around a joint, and I quickly head past them, eyes skimming over the surroundings to see if the girls are here. I spot their three dark heads close together, looking at something on Seulgiâs phone, and I rush over. Nayeon spots me first, concern on her face as she watches me head towards them. âWhatâs the matter, y/n?â she asks, the other two girls looking up at hearing my name. âI⌠Iâm gonna leave,â I say, all three of them looking at me in surprise â you usually have to drag me away from a party. âWhy? You look hot, girl! You canât waste this look!â Seulgi exclaims, throwing an arm around my shoulders, and I give her a grateful smile. âThanks, Seulgi, but I just⌠Iâm fed up of being teased about Jimin. Maybe itâs God punishing me for sleeping with him, but for fuckâs sake, isnât him being an idiot punishment enough? I donât need everyone bringing it up every two fucking seconds,â I complain, the three of them exchanging amused glances.
âOh, babe, it sucks, but youâve gotta be thick skinned. You have to remember that you have publicly hated him for as long as weâve all known you, pretty much. The fact that youâve slept with him is, like, a big deal. Itâs hot gossip. Of course people are gonna want to talk about it, and you are gonna get teased. You canât let it get to you, or people will do it even more,â Jennie says rationally, and I know sheâs right, but I still donât want to accept it, pouting. âI know, youâre right, but Iâm already in a bad mood now, and I just wanna go home,â I say, and I know Iâm being immature, but I donât care. I notice Nayeonâs eyes wander from me to over my shoulder and then she says, âwell, someoneâs coming over, and I donât whether heâs going to make your mood better or worse.â I sigh, wanting to cry, and I can feel Seulgi holding back a laugh. âShall I tell him to fuck off?â Jennie asks, and I shake my head â I donât have the energy to fight with him today.
ây/n,â I hear his stupid voice say, before he appears beside me. Heâs dressed in all black, tight ripped jeans and a black button-up shirt, the top two buttons undone and revealing tanned and freckled skin, with a leather jacket over the top of it. Heâs wearing silver jewellery again, rings, earrings, bracelets and a necklace, and he looks really fucking handsome, like always. He looks me up and down, his eyes nearly falling out of his head at my appearance as he sweeps his black hair back with one hand, before he looks at my face, the shock being replaced with concern. âYou okay?â he asks, and him caring about me makes me want to run a mile â heâs supposed to hate me, not worry when Iâm upset and annoyed. âI⌠donât know,â I say tiredly, not quite sure what to say, and he looks even more concerned at that. âShall we⌠give you guys a minute?â Jennie says, and I look at her in surprise. She just looks back at me with a sad smile, and then I realise; sheâs knows that thereâs more to this, to me and⌠Jimin, than just two people who fucked even though they hate each other. And so do I, the thought terrifying me. His feelings are involved, and maybe mine are too, and I already know this is gonna get messy, messier than it should. But I donât really have it in me to put a stop to it right now. I think I must have hurt him a lot when I left him last week (the thought of him waking up to an empty bed when he thought I would be there beside him makes me feel sick to my stomach) and I donât ever want to hurt someone like that again. Even if it that someone is Jimin, the most annoying, stupid, selfish, egotistic, infuriating, big-headed person to ever walk the Earth.
I stay silent, and Jimin takes that as a sign to nod at the girls, all of them giving me little hugs before they head back up towards the house. The few people that are outside are watching interestedly and I want to just tell them to all fuck off. I used to think Iâd love being the centre of attention all the time, but Iâve definitely changed my mind. âWhatâs the matter, y/n?â he asks gently, and I sigh, not meeting his eyes as I think, not sure what to tell him. He stays quiet as he waits for me to speak, which leaves us in a heavy silence. âI⌠Iâm just fed up. All anyoneâs been speaking to me about is you and I donât like it because thereâs more to talk about to me than my sex life, and I hate that people are always staring at me now and probably thinking all these things about me when they barely know me and everyoneâs making me regret sleeping with you but I donât want to regret it because it was good and I enjoyed it and it was with you, but I donât know why thatâs making me not regret it but I kind of do know because I donât think that I see you the same as I used to anymore, which is something else I hate because Iâm supposed to hate you, and I do but I also donât think I do, and Iâm so confused, and I just want to go home,â I say miserably all in one breath, and he looks a little taken aback, but nods when Iâm finished speaking. âI⌠Iâve been thinking a lot of the same things the last week, and Iâm confused too. So if itâs any consolation, I know how you feel,â he says, and somehow⌠it is consolation. I already knew his feelings towards me had changed, but hearing that he feels all the other stuff too, it does make me feel better. But Iâm a stubborn bitch.
âNo, actually, Iâm not sure you do know how I feel. Because I didnât make it harder for you. I didnât show up somewhere solely to piss you off, and laugh with my friends to make you feel self-conscious, and be all smug and amused and rude to you, and pull your underwear out of my pocket in front of everyone to embarrass you. So no, Jimin, you donât know how I feel,â I reply angrily, unable to help myself, but itâs true â he made this all a hundred times worse at try-outs earlier, and I am angry at him for it. I wait for him to get angry in return, to point out that I probably didnât make it any better for him by being a bitch, but Iâm pleasantly surprised when he just nods, his head dropping sheepishly. âIâm sorry, y/n. I didnât mean to, I promise â I never intended to piss you off or to make you feel self-conscious or to embarrass you. I tend to⌠not think before I do things, and I guess my pride was hurt that you left so I wanted to just save face. And I shouldnât have⌠left you earlier. I was just being petty and wanted to get back at you. Iâm really sorry,â he says earnestly, and Iâm shocked into silence for a few moments, before I nod.
âOkay. I accept your apology,â I say, and he smiles. âIâm glad. Now⌠shall I take you home?â he asks, and I blink in surprise. âWhat?â âYou said you wanted to go home so do you want me to take you?â he offers, and I hesitate for a moment. âIâm not sure thatâs a good idea.â âWhy not?â âBecause Iâm supposed to hate you, and youâre supposed to hate me,â I whisper, and he raises an eyebrow, taking a step closer to me. âLike I said earlier⌠would it really be so bad if we didnât hate each other?â he replies quietly, and Iâm silent. âI donât⌠I donât know. Itâs kinda⌠scary to think about. And itâs just easier to hate you. AndâŚâ I trail off, and an amused smile appears on his stupid face. âYouâre too stubborn to not hate me when youâve hated me for so long, right?â he says, seeing right through me, and I nod sheepishly. âWe really need to work on your stubbornness, because I can see a future for us, y/n. If you could just give in to your feelings for me, we could pursue something together,â he grins, but thereâs no humour, no amusement in his voice at all, his honesty nearly winding me. He throws an arm around my shoulders and slowly walks us back up to the house. âA future? For you and me?â I echo, and he lets out a gentle laugh. âYeah! Weâll get married as soon as we finish Uni, have a load of kids, and they can become footballers and cheerleaders to follow in our footsteps,â he says, and I choke, making him let out a loud laugh. âOkay, maybe not as soon as we finish Uni. Iâll make that sacrifice.â âThanks.â âOf course, angel. Anything for you.â
The second we step into the house, all eyes in the kitchen look up at us. âCan we help you?â Jimin asks evenly, daring them to say something, and theyâre all silent. âThought so,â he mutters, leading us over to where the drinks are as conversation resumes around us, albeit much quieter now. Jimin eyes the dozens of bottles covering the countertop before his eyes flit to the cup in my hand. âWhat you drinking, babe?â he asks quietly, and I hold my drink up for him to try. âYou trying to roofie me?â he grins, and I let out a little laugh. âItâs Fireball whisky and cream soda. Jeongyeonâs concoction,â I say, and he grimaces before trying some, his face instantly changing. âOh, wow, thatâs good,â he says, reaching for the whisky bottle to pour himself some. âDid you just arrive?â I ask, and he nods. âI literally got here, walked into the kitchen, saw you werenât in here, asked Mark where you were, and he said you were outside. I was coming to apologise,â he says, and my heart warms. âTo be honest⌠I should apologise too,â I say, and his mouth drops open. âI canât believe my ears. Is stubborn y/n finally discarding her pride?â âShut up, stupid,â I laugh, shoving him gently, and he grins. âYou donât have to apologise, angel. You were scared that we didnât hate each other, so you left, and then you were a bitch to me so that Iâd hate you. Thatâs it. Donât worry about it,â he says, and I nod, grateful that I donât have to apologise.
âOkay,â he says once heâs poured his drink, âshall we get away from all the staring?â I raise an eyebrow, and he laughs. âI didnât mean that, but if youâre down. I still owe you from earlier,â he says lowly with a smirk, and my breath catches in my throat. âUm⌠maybe later. Letâs⌠see whatâs going on in the rest of the house,â I say, and he nods, grinning at my flustered state. And then he takes my hand into his, our fingers laced together, and a little shock runs up my arm at the contact. I nearly slap myself â he was rearranging my guts earlier, but Iâm getting butterflies at him holding my hand? Really?
He leads me into the living room, several pairs of eyes turning to us, but he completely ignores them, so I do too. âYou wanna stay in here?â he asks over the loud music, and I shake my head. He nods, continuing to lead us through the room into the front hallway. The layout is the same as the ASP house, so Jimin knows his way around, leading me through the hallway and pushing open the door to the other living room, where itâs considerably more chill. The haze of weed lays heavy on the air, music gently pulsing through the room, and there are a lot less people in here, majority the boys on the football team with their girlfriends. âOh, y/n, Chan spoke to me, IâŚâ Felix calls to me before his eyes land on Jimin behind me, his words trailing off when he spots our intertwined hands. âYeah, itâs⌠yeah,â I say, a little embarrassed, and Felix just nods, holding back a laugh when Jimin looks between us. âWhat did Chan speak to you about, Lix?â Jimin asks, and I cringe. âTheyâre the ones that walked into the changing rooms earlier,â I say under my breath, and he lets out a little noise of realisation with a nod, a smirk playing at his lips as he looks at Felix, the boy looking endlessly amused. âOh, are you guys talking about how we walked in on you in the changing room?â Jisung calls out tactlessly, and I close my eyes, gathering myself, as laughter ripples around the room. âYou know what? Letâs just leave,â I say tiredly, more laughter following my words, and Jimin nods, bidding goodbye to his friends with a smug grin as he leads me out of the room.
âShall we sit outside?â he suggests, and I nod, letting him pull me through the front door. I shut the door behind us, and when I turn back, Jiminâs sat on the front step, looking out onto the front garden. Itâs surprisingly empty, and itâs quiet out here, the only noise coming faintly from inside. I sit down beside him, pulling my dress down, and Jimin notices, a greasy smirk appearing on his face. âI swear to God, Park, I will not hesitate to throw this drink at you,â I say, and he laughs, eyes disappearing behind their lids. âI was just gonna say that you look really nice. That dress really suits you,â he grins, and I eye him suspiciously, holding back a laugh. He holds his hands up, feigning innocence, and I let out a gentle laugh, taking a sip of my drink. âDid you wear it for me?â he asks, and I nod without looking at him. âGood choice. I like it,â he replies, reaching for my hand, and I canât help the small smile on my face as he laces his fingers with mine, our hands resting in my lap.
We both fall into a comfortable silence, and itâs really nice. Itâs like all the other stuff falls away and doesnât matter anymore, and weâre just a girl and a boy sat on the front steps of a frat house, taking a moment away from the party under the night sky, holding hands and drinking whisky and soda. We sit in silence for a few minutes, and I think that this is what true peace is like; when things are quiet and simple and easy, and nothingâs bothering me, nothingâs complicated or confusing, nothing matters. Itâs almost too good to be true.
The door behind us opens after a few minutes, both of us turning to see Jeongin and Changbin, two more boys on the team, and Jimin grins widely when he sees them. I turn to face the front garden again, my back to the boys with my hand still in Jiminâs, both resting in my lap. âBoys! How are you? Ready for first practice next week?â Jimin asks them, and I roll my eyes amusedly â football is their livelihood, and Jiminâs in his element talking about football, even more now that heâs been promoted to Captain. âLooking forward to it, Captain!â Jeongin exclaims, hyping Jimin up even more. âBefore we get distracted with football, we thought weâd let you know that, um, Rosieâs been looking for you. She asked us where you were and we said we didnât know so we could buy you some time, but sheâll probably find you soon,â Changbin says, and I freeze at the mention of his ex, Jimin wincing. âUm, okay, thanks, guys. Iâll, uh, speak to you later,â he says, dismissing them, and they quickly disappear with a âbyeâ thrown over their shoulders before the door shuts.
âWhy is Rosie looking for you?â I ask amusedly, knowing exactly why sheâs looking for him. She and Jimin have been in an on-again-off-again relationship for a long time, but he ended it for good at the end of last year, and stayed true to his word. According to the rumours, they donât even talk anymore, just walk past each other without a word, and they havenât slept with each other again. But sheâs obviously got wind about me, and is jealous. âUm, yeah, about that. Thereâs probably something I should tell you,â he says hesitantly, and I feel my body go a little cold as I turn my eyes to him â maybe there is a different reason sheâs looking for him. âI⌠may have⌠slept with her⌠on Tuesday,â he says, and the words donât really register with me for a moment. ây/n?â he says, eyes full of worry and I blink, realisation washing over me.
He slept with her. Four days ago.
I remove his hand from mine, and he flinches when I do so, retracting his hand slowly. âWhat⌠were you thinking?â I ask, and he just blinks for a moment. âI was thinking that you hated me because you left and I was hurt so I found comfort in someone else,â he says, tone neutral, but I can hear the defensiveness coming through. And, okay, maybe that is a good enough reason. But Iâm still angry. Do I even have a right to be angry? âBut your ex? Jimin, I-â âYes, y/n, my ex. I donât really think you have a right to be angry. You left me. You knew my feelings for you were different to what you first thought, and you left anyway!â he exclaims, voice rising, and I roll my eyes, letting out a humourless laugh. âI wasnât obligated to stay just because you liked me!â âBut you liked me too!â âIâm not sure I did, Jimin, and Iâm still not sure about it! Besides, you literally said like fifteen minutes ago that you understood why I left and that I didnât need to apologise for it!â I point out, and he scoffs. âI do understand, but that doesnât mean it hurts any less, y/n. I was hurting and she was at the ASP house picking up her hair clip that she lost at the party and one thing led to ano-â âSo she just happened to be at the house, picking up a hair clip, three days after what happened between you and me? You donât think she planned that?â I say incredulously, unable to believe how dense he is. âSo what if she did? To me, it was meaningless sex, to get my mind off you. I donât think you have a right to be angry.â âI donât think I do either, but I still am!â I exclaim, and he rolls his eyes, a smile playing at his lips. âYouâre not angry, youâre jealous.â âIâm not jealous, Jimin, donât be ridiculous,â I scoff, even more pissed off now. âYou are.â âIf I said, âletâs go upstairs and fuckâ right now, you would be down, so what have I got to be jealous about?â I ask lowly, and his eyes darken. âFine. Youâre not jealous. Youâre angry I slept with someone else because you like me. Donât even bother saying youâre still not sure because thatâs the only reason for you to be angry. And in that case, I understand. And Iâm sorry. I wonât do it again,â he says calmly, and I donât say anything, looking away from him.
After a few moments, he reaches for my hand tentatively, gauging my reaction before lacing our fingers together again. âYou donât have to apologise. Iâm just being silly,â I say, and he chuckles, moving closer to me. âIâll apologise as many times as you need me to. I really do like you, y/n, and I kinda have for a while. I donât want to fuck up whatever this is happening between us. And I know youâre still reluctant and you still want to hate me or whatever, but I donât mind waiting until youâre ready. Iâm happy to take time to win you over,â he says softly, and my heart warms a little. The contrast between this Jimin and the Jimin from last week really is insane. There are so many sides to him, itâs hard to keep track. âSorry,â I say, and he lets out a gentle laugh. âYou donât have to apologise for getting angry that I slept with my ex, even if we didnât make any commitments to each other. I understand,â he says simply, and I canât help the smile on my face as I shuffle even closer to him, our sides pressed together and my head resting on his shoulder.
And again, itâs nice. But it really is too good to be true. The door behind us is wrenched open before we hear, âJimin?â I sigh, Jimin turning to look at Rosie. âRosie,â he replies, voice neutral, and I turn around, our eyes meeting. âHi, Rosie,â I smile at the girl. Iâve never actually had a problem with Rosie â we run in the same social circles, sheâs a Cheerleader, and weâve never been close but from what I know of her, sheâs okay. âHi, y/n. Do you mind if I speak to Jimin for a moment?â she says sweetly. âOf course,â I reply with a smile, not moving a muscle, and Jimin sighs. ây/n, please,â he says, and I turn to him, annoyance unfurling in my chest. âOkay,â I say coldly, dropping his hand from mine and rising up, brushing past Rosie into the house.
What is wrong with him? Has he got no common sense? The logical thing to have done is obviously to not speak to her â what could she possibly have to say? All sheâs going to do is try to get him back. And heâs really stupid enough to ask me to leave? Am I a dickhead? I let out an angry sigh, deciding that Iâve had enough. Heâs been spouting all this shit about how he doesnât want to fuck this up, and then literally like two fucking minutes later, heâs having a private conversation with his ex. This is like âTo All the Boys Iâve Loved Beforeâ but in real life. Heâs Peter, Rosieâs Gen and Iâm Lara Jean. Somehow though, I feel like I wonât have the same happy ending.
ây/n!â I hear Jennie call from the other living room, where sheâs sat with Jihyo and Irene, and I sigh, heading in. âWhatâs happened?â she asks, and I roll my eyes, the attention of everyone in the room on me. ��He apologised and we made up but then he asked me to leave so he could have a private conversation with his ex,â I say, and they all gasp, confirming that Iâm not a crazy bitch and that he shouldnât be having private conversations with his ex. âOh, girl, you better not forgive his stupid ass,â Jihyo says, the other girls in the room nodding and giving various agreements, and the boys are all quiet â they obviously feel a sense of loyalty to Jimin and donât want to talk bad about him. âI feel so pissed, but I also feel like I donât have a right to be pissed,â I say, and the girls all frown, disagreeing instantly. âYou do have a right to be pissed. You should go throw your drink over his stupid head,â Jennie says angrily, and I hold back a laugh.
âI donât know what to do,â I sigh helplessly, perching on the arm of Seungminâs armchair. âItâs a red flag, y/n. End things here â donât let it go too far otherwise youâll get too attached, your feelings will get deeper and stronger, and itâs just not worth it. Him and Rosie are always messing around and itâll probably be like that for a long time â sheâs a nice girl but sheâs got Jimin wrapped around her finger and she knows it. If he tries to move on, sheâll stop it. Itâs not worth you getting involved in that, because you shouldnât have to compete with his ex,â Irene says softly, everybody listening to her, and I know sheâs exactly right; I might⌠maybe⌠kinda⌠sorta⌠like(?) Jimin now, but heâs not worth competing with another girl for. If thereâs even a choice for him, I should walk away. I deserve someone who wants me and only me. âGod, youâre right,â I wail, throwing myself back against the armchair and lifting my hand to my face despairingly, a little laugh running around the room at my dramatics as Seungmin pats my arm comfortingly. âI know heâs our friend, y/n, but heâs also kinda a dick when it comes to girls, and we all know it. I mean, he was literally bragging to us yesterday about what happened between you guys,â Minho says, and I feel my focus shifting entirely to his words when he says that, my entire body tensing. âWhat did he say?â I ask calmly, though I can feel my anger slowly rising, along with the tension in the room. âWell⌠um,â Minho begins hesitantly, before sighing, âwe all went to ASP last night for KPN and ASP Pizza Friday, and we were speaking about going to watch you guys at the try-outs. JB mentioned that, as the new captain, you might get pissed if we showed up, and then the conversation turned to you and Jimin last week.â
Iâm in total shock; he blatantly lied to me earlier, by telling me that heâd only told his closest friends. The thought that all those boys were sat together last night, talking about me, makes my stomach turn. âWhat did he tell you guys?â I ask shakily, despite not actually wanting to know. âUm⌠everything,â Minho says, and my heart drops. âEverything?â âYeah. Everything,â Chan confirms, voice gentle, and I can feel tears pricking my eyes. âWow. Okay. So not only is he a dick, he blatantly lied,â I say flatly, the room completely silent other than the low RnB beat pulsing from the speaker. âIâm gonna go. Sorry for, uh, killing the vibe,â I say quietly, pushing myself up from the arm of Seungminâs armchair and heading towards the door, multiple people in the room calling after me.
I quickly dart up the stairs, dodging past the couple making out on the landing and into the bathroom, locking the door behind me. Part of me is numb, in complete shock, and doesnât know how to react. Another part of me is unbelievably hurt that he completely lied to my face, and that he asked me to leave so he could talk to his ex. Privately. Another part of me is totally humiliated that he told the boys everything, my pride completely ruined now. And the other part of me is annoyed at myself for being so hurt about a boy who, this time last week, I hated and wouldâve rather fought than fucked.
ây/n, itâs me,â I hear Jennieâs voice from the other side of the door, and I unlock it to let her in. She pulls me into a hug, and I have to scrunch my eyes shut to stop myself from crying, pushing my head into her neck as she rubs my back comfortingly. âHeâs so trash, babe. So trash. You deserve so much better,â she says soothingly, and I try my best to fully believe her words, but itâs hard when Iâm also trying to hold back my tears.
Before I can even speak to her, Jiwonâs head appears around the door, her eyes widening when she sees how upset I am. ây/n! Sorry for just walking in but are you okay?â she asks, eyes big with concern, and my heart warms. âUgh, yeah,â I say, Jennie and I moving apart, and I tilt my head back, blinking furiously to get rid of my tears. âItâs just Jimin. Heâs such a dick. Iâm done with him,â I say, the words coming out of my mouth before I even think of them, and I realise that, yes, I am done with him. Iâm not wasting my time on him anymore.
âGood. You deserve better. I mean, I knew he was a dick when he literally grabbed me on the way up to his room last week and dragged me along behind him. He made me think he was attracted to me, but he obviously just wanted to make you jealous,â Jiwon says, and it makes me hate him even more. I didnât even think about how hurt she must have been when she realised he was just using her. âGod, he really is a dick,â I spit, face twisted up in disgust, and Jiwon lets out a gentle laugh. âIâm surprised you didnât see that sooner.â âI knew all along. There was a reason I hated him so much â heâs always been a self-absorbed, egotistic, arrogant douche, but now⌠heâs even worse in my eyes.â
âShall we head back downstairs, get you a drink, dance? Or⌠shall we head home? We could have a little girlsâ night â weâve got a couple bottles of Echo Falls in the fridge, Clueless and Mean Girls on Netflix, and I have a few face masks. We could invite some of the other girls, too. And you could join us, Jiwon. We could get drunk, order pizza and talk about how much of a bastard Jimin is,â Jennie says, the three of us laughing. Sheâs really sold the idea â it sounds like a lot of fun â but itâs late already. Itâs better if I just head home and go to sleep. I actually feel exhausted after the events of today; itâs been an emotional rollercoaster, and Iâm literally craving my bed right now. âThat sounds fun, Jen, but maybe we could do that another night. I could do with just sleeping tonight,â I say, and she nods, smiling gently.
âShall I order an Uber?â âYou stay,â I say, and she frowns. âWhy would I stay? Youâre upset â Iâll come back with you.â âNo, honestly, Iâll be fine. You stay, enjoy the party. You havenât even spent any time with Namjoon,â I say, and she rolls her eyes. âI donât care about spending time with Namjoon right now. Youâre my priority. Iâm coming home with you,â she says firmly, pulling her phone out of her pocket, and I exchange an exasperated glance with Jiwon, the other girl incredibly amused.
As soon as Jennieâs ordered the Uber, we head downstairs to bid everyone goodbye. The second I step into the kitchen, Jin and Jungkook appear in front of me, grinning like the Cheshire Cat. âDonât say a word, because I swear to God, I wonât hesitate to kick you both in the balls,â I threaten angrily, and their grins soon disappear. âHave you been crying, y/n? Whatâs the ma-?â âDonât say a word!â I exclaim, pushing past them to say goodbye to Wendy, Lisa, Chaeyoung and Tzuyu, the three of them giving me tight and comforting hugs â it seems that wordâs already gotten around to the girls about Jimin and I. Then, in the living room, Nayeon, Seulgi, Mina, Jeongyeon, Jisoo, Momo, Joy and Sana all stop dancing the second I walk in, smothering me in hugs, and I know for sure that word has gotten around. And then, in the other living room, Jihyo, Irene, Yeri and Dahyun all give me big hugs too, and it really does make me feel better. Girls say it a lot, but itâs true â as long as you have your girls around you, you really donât need a man. Any KNP or ASP boys that I walk past get the cold shoulder â they were all present when Jimin told them the dirty details and, despite some of them being my friends, close friends, not one of them thought to tell me. The only person that gets a goodbye from me is Minho; the rest of them can fuck themselves.
When I reach the front door, my hand shakes for a moment and I hesitate, Jennie putting a comforting hand on my shoulder. I take a deep breath, rolling back my shoulders and raising my chin a little, injecting as much confidence into my body language as possible before I aggressively turn the handle, pulling the door towards me forcefully. Theyâre still sat on the front doorstep, Rosie where I was sat just half an hour ago, and they both jump when they hear the door open. And even though they react instantly, I still spot Jiminâs hand retracting from Rosieâs, leaving hers empty.
My eyes flit back up, in front of me, and I carefully walk through the gap between them, ignoring them both completely. ây/n? Are you leaving?â I hear Jimin ask, but Jennie puts a hand on my back, the both of us continuing to walk up towards the road and away from him. ây/n! Wait!â he calls after me, and then I hear his footsteps behind us, making my blood boil â can he not take the hint? âWhat, Jimin?â I demand, whirling around to face him, and he hesitates in his steps. ây/n-â âNo, Jimin, donât ây/nâ me. What the fuck do you want?â âI⌠youâre angry at me,â he says quietly, and I let out a harsh laugh. âGreat observation, Jimin! What else will you come out with? The grass is green? Or the sky is blue, perhaps?â âOkay, you donât need to be so bitchy to m-â âBitchy?â I practically scream, marching towards him, and he recoils away from me. Good. Iâm glad heâs scared.
âI think Iâm well within my rights to be bitchy to you, you fucking bastard!â I shriek, and he flinches, confusion all over his face. âWhat did I do, y/n? I⌠let me fix it,â he says, and I let out another humourless laugh. âFix it? You want to fix it?â I ask hysterically, voice shaking, âYou mightâve been able to fix the fact that you asked me to leave so you could have a private conversation with your ex, but thatâs a very strong âmightâ, because I am not a choice, Jimin! You donât get to mess me around! Iâm number one, or Iâm nothing to you at all!â âOkay. Okay, I understand, and Iâm sorry. I wonât do something like that again,â he says earnestly, desperation in his eyes, but I canât muster up any sympathy at all. Maybe I am a bitch, like he told me so many times last week.
âNo, youâre not going to do something like that again. Because youâre not going to have the chance, Jimin. We are done. Thatâs it,â I say, and any hope that was in his eyes completely disappears, the light draining away. âWhat? Why? I thought you wanted⌠to give us a go,â he says quietly, sounding⌠lost, and confused. It only makes me angrier â heâs not gonna get away with playing innocent today. âI did. Before I found out that you went and blabbed every single detail of last week to every fucking frat boy in ASP and KPN last night! Did you somehow forget about that, or did you purposely leave out that detail when I asked you earlier?â I scream, body shaking with fury, and the second he registers my words, the colour disappears from his face, and he looks like he might throw up. He doesnât say anything, and I give him the chance, but he doesnât even bother to deny it, just stares at me in shock and the last shred of my hope that maybe Minho lied, that he exaggerated, or that maybe Jimin only told a couple of the guys disappears. âYeah. Thatâs what I thought too. So forgive me for being such a bitch,â I spit at him, and he opens his mouth to speak, no words coming out.
âGo on. Say something. Youâve had plenty to say all night. So letâs hear it,â I prompt sarcastically, and he just blinks before he whispers miserably; âIâm so sorry.â âSorry? Youâre sorry? Oh, well, thatâs okay! Everythingâs solved now, huh? That just makes everything fine!â I shout, and his head drops, eyes on the ground. âNot only did you tell everyone, you lied about it! So how can I pursue something with you when youâre already lying to me? I canât trust a word you say!â âI⌠Iâm not defending myself⌠but you lied to me too, y/n. You told me that you told Jennie, and âa couple of the other girlsâ. But we both know that was a lie,â he says slowly, stuttering as he speaks, and Iâm dumbfounded, in complete and utter shock.
âYou⌠you donât understand. I told the girls, my closest friends. We tell each other everything. Iâve been there for them through everything, and theyâve been there for me through everything. You told two entire fraternities of immature and idiotic man children! You donât think thereâs a difference between the two? I bet they congratulated you, right? On getting the girl that hates you into bed? Asked what I was like? What my body looks like? Whether I had good head game, or good pussy? Saw me as just a slut, another conquest, another notch in your belt? Two entire fraternities objectified me last night, and you canât even try to tell me otherwise, because I can guarantee that every girl in this damn university has had an experience to prove that you frat boys are disgusting. So you can fuck yourself, Jimin, and donât ever compare me telling the girls to you telling those idiots again,â I spit out angrily, and heâs completely silent, confirming everything Iâve just said. âIâm done with you. Donât ever speak to me again,â I hiss before turning on my heel and marching to where Jen stands outside the Uber, smiling at me softly.
âThat was amazing. Iâm so proud of you,â she says when I reach her, and I smile back as she opens the car door, letting me climb in first. I slide across the seat, Jennie following me in, and when she shuts the door behind her, I feel my heart pulse with hurt, eyes filling with tears. And as the driver pulls away from the house and I turn to look out of the rear window, being met with the sight of Jimin stood there, watching the car drive away, his eyes shining with tears, I canât hold back my own, sobbing as if my heart would break.
#ficswithluv#fwlbingo#smutcentralnet#bangtanhq#bangtanarmynet#btswriterscollective#ksmutclub#btsgoldnet#bangtanidx#btspocnet#kwritersworldnet#btsghostie#magicshopnet#bts#bts park jimin#bts series#BTS jimin#bts fanfic#bts fanfiction#bts fluff#bts smut#bts angst#bts au#bts imagines#park jimin#park jimin smut#park jimin fanfic#park jimin au
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Moments from the new Sanders ASides video that had me screaming (or really, me screaming about the new video)
âRAIIIIIDâ
*Raid Thomas sounding like Roman/Remus*
âYou bet your shiny metal AXâ
âMASCULINITY IS A PRISONâ
âWhy do I pay for a membership if I still gotta watch the ads?â
THE FACT THAT THEY ALL ARE WEARING ONESIES EXCEPT THOMAS AND LOGAN BECAUSE LOGAN IS SERIOUS BOI AND THOMAS WELL,,, IS THOMAS
Also ROMAN CANONICALLY HAS LEGS***
ROMAN HAS ALL THE PILLOWS
VIRGIL IS SITTING ON A SURFACE THAT ISNâT MEANT TO BE SAT ON BUT IS SO RELATABLE BECAUSE I DO THAT EXACT THING WHAT
âUnless our problem is a hungry alligator-â âA remote possibility for a Florida dwelling man who never leaves his houseâ
Roman rigging the votes so itâs just Frozen and Patton is okay with that (WAIT BUT WHY IS PATTON CHILL (pun not intended) WITH IT???)
LOGAN HAD A CASUAL FALSEHOOD????Â
WAIT WHAT DID THE SIDES VOTE FOR??
âThomas is in a bad place-â *camera pans to VIRGIL*
Roman calling Thomas a special snowflake
âSomething goodâ *Frozen shows*Â â,,, or neutralâ
âAnd from this point on, NO MORE NORDIC INSPIRED NUMBERSâ
Virgil keep going back to the actual problem while Roman and Patton just like 90% forget the problem and Logan talks to and tries to calm Virgil
âI ALSO LOVE YOU OLAFâ
âCuties, Iâm gonna keep youâ âAh youâre joking right? No youâre mine nowâ
âThe heart is not so easily changedâ âNo it isnâtâ *confused Patton noises*
âBut, the head can be persuadedâ âCan it though?â THAT SHADE AT LOGAN HOLY MOTHER OF FUCK
âFear will be your enemyâ *gay emo panic*
âSo youâre saying lock her away because sheâs dangerousâ GOING BACK TO VIRGIL??? UH????
âJOAN!!!â They definitely wrote that line
Virgilâs mini existential crisis
Remus just yeeted up from behind the couch shirtless oh god was he jacking off to Frozen wtf
REMUS GETTING SO EXCITED ABOUT THE PARENTS DYING IS HONESTLY SO PURE EVEN THOUGH ITâS NOT AT ALL
âI SLEEP IN THE B U F Fâ
âDid I screw everything up?â âNo I threw out your vote so you wouldnât do thatâ ROMAN WHAT
Roman: *calls Frozen a Classic* Also Roman: *Makes fun of the entire movie and demands a rewrite*
âHow are you telling me to settle into something right now when youâve taken your sweet time to settle into things that you were uncomfortable with in the pastâ THAT SHADE!! THAT TEA!! I WANT TO KNOW MORE ABOUT THESE *THINGS* PLEASE????
Patton: Letâs relax!! :) Virgil: Bruh I legit AM Anxiety thatâs not in my job description
âHow many times has our response to a difficult decision been half committing to one option and subsequently panicking about whether that option is our best option until itâs too late for Thomas to change his mind?â â7,430âł MOOD
âWhy have a ballroom with no balls?â *Trash boi snickers at the dick joke that wasnât there until then* "Nope, Iâm an adultâ (me me big boy-)
ROMANâS IMPERSONATION OF HISÂ âEVIL PLOTTING FACEâ HAS BE DEAD ON THE FLOOR
âAW MAN YEAH IâM LIKE SO FUCKED UP ON CHOCOLATE FONDUE I DONâT EVEN KNOW WHAT IâM SAYING RIGHT NOWâ *Patton looks over, concerned* *Virgil looks over, annoyed* *Thomas glances over, lowkey amused* *Logan doesnât even look at him and just grabs his tea*
NO TURN OFF LOVE IS AN OPEN DOOR ITâS MAKING PATTON SAD (ALSO IS HIS CONNECTION PROJECTING? AND IS ROMANâS RESPONSE A L S O ACCURATE?)Â
âThereâs no way sheâs coming out of this situation without trust issuesâ honestly though yeah
âNot a footprint to be seenâ âExcept for the footprints behind youâ âhEy YeAhâ KEEP IT UP LOGAN YOUâRE DOING GREAT SWEETIE
Virgil: *Serious comment* Patton:Â âDonât let them in, donât let them see...â (did he sing the rest of the song or did he specifically choose these lines because if itâs the second one THAT CAN BE A WHOLE LOT OF ANGST AND IâM HERE FOR IT)
Logan canonically criticizes the movie at movie nights
ALSO GUYS THE VIDEO CAME OUT ON A FRIDAY SO FRIDAY NIGHT MOVIE NIGHTS ARE CANON
âDo you think this ice castle has a lavatory?â âICE TOILETâ âOr a bed?â âICE BEDâ âThis place sounds awfulâ
âHE DEFINITELY FUCKS THE REINDEERâ âewâ
âYou meddled with the vote to ensure that we would watch this and yet youâre the one constantly making fun of itâ FACTS LOGANÂ
âThis [^] is how I show my loveâ WAIT A MINUTE *Looks back at the entire series* HE MADE FUN OF VIRGIL SO MUCH SO WAIT PRINXIETY??? LAMP?? DR LAMP?? (is that the ship name because thatâs this video basically*
Nobody:Â Â Â Not a soul:Â Â Â Roman: OLAFâS CONTRIBUTION SHOULD HAVE COUNTED AND SAVED HER
âLike... bruhâ mood
âTake care of my sisterâ âYouâve already done a good job of that yourself Elsaâ *hood falls off*
âAh, weâre all gossipy bitches sometimesâ ânO-â (also Roman channeled so much Remy energy right there headcanon they hang out all the time change my mind)
âOh sweet Frank Ieroâ Iâm using that now
âJust think about itâ âLIKE I HAVE A CHOICEâ
âAttacking a person for opinions they donât have doesnât really do anybody any goodâ Me: BECAUSE IT DOESNâT WORK!! AYYY YOU LISTENED TO AND ARE REFERENCING LOGAN IN LAST EPISODE??? OR AM I JUST TRASH??
âOh yeah like me kissing a man is unacceptable?â What a power move thoughÂ
âAAAAALSJDFOAGHOKLNOIATYRGHâ Mood
Ok but also like Virgil basically rapped like that rapid talking was as fast as a bunch of rappers and even faster than some
Logan using the grounding method that my therapist suggested gave me life
Most of Virgilâs grounding answers were existential and oof
âA sour taste in my mouth probably left over from those reheated thai noodle leftoversâ *Confused faces*
âFIGURATIVELYâ *DWIT has entered the chat*
âThank you Loganâ âNo problem, just your cool teacher being his cool selfâ *sips tea* Felt that. Also I have a new reaction image now XD
âTake it from Frozenâs most inspirational songâ Let it Go? âFixer Upperâ Oh but ya know what valid
âThrow a little love their wayâ Virgil *confused smile?? I think thatâs what that is??*
âElsa, we the villagers have thought it over and with no discussion whatsoever weâve decided weâre not scared anymore and ice magic is actually cool as hell!!â YEAH WAIT A MINUTE OMG
Logan: *Lists all of Elsaâs powers, reading from a notebook (meaning he took notes while watching the movie which is so in character omg) and implying that there is no way any of that makes sense* Patton: Sounds okay that makes sense
âWith Elsaâs seemingly unstoppable âice powersâ Iâd imagine Arendelle becomes a global superpower. No military force of that time could ever stand a chance against her never ending army of ice golemsâÂ
Nobody:Â Â Â Not a soul:Â Â Â Patton: âTrue love is a closed door that is eventually opened up to you!â
âWhat if your soulmate was thereâ âOH SHITâ I love Roman that was all it took huh
*Deceit has entered the chat* âHISSâÂ
âDonât touch my shitâ
I wish we got to see Deceitâs face there but I get it we couldnât see him without his hat (except for in the bloopers videos but those donât count) (Also they probably just didnât wanna do the makeup for him because itâs a lot and it mightâve been a split second decision and someone else mightâve played him with Thomas just voice recording over it especially considering thereâs overlap so they wouldnât have just been able to split screen it)
âI was gonna rig the vote anywayâ
âI donât know what youâre askingâ
Roman is the source of SFW fanfic and Remus is the source of NSFW fanfic and Virgil is the source of angsty fanfic
âIâm going to bed. IN THE B U F Fâ
THE NEW SWEATERS IM BROKE SO IF SOMEONE WANTS TO GET ME ALL OF THEM (at least just Virgilâs even though I love like all of them)
WAIT THEREâS SCARVES TOO OMG I ALSO WANT ALL OF THEM (or at least,,, nope all of them)
âWe were trying to make a slightly simpler videoâ Video: *is longer than most of season 1â˛s episodes* *has full body shots of almost all the characters* *has like 5 way split scenes* *uses every side*Â
WAIT LOGAN BROUGHT BACK OUT HIS ONESIE I LOVE HIM and heâs still got his necktie on just underneath it amazing
This video was just LAMP and potentially DLAMP and maybe DR LAMP if thatâs the ship name. There were also a bunch of really good Prinxiety, Royality, Analogical, and Roceit moments in this one so Iâm expecting fanfic hella soon
Also as of right now (I finished writing this at like 4am ET) we are still #1 on trending on Tumblr
***We never see Remusâs legs in the video so my theory of there is only one set of legs for the creativitwins still stands and is valid
#sanders sides#sanders asides#thomas sanders#healthy distractions#are there healthy distractions#athd#logan#logan sanders#patton sanders#patton#virgil#virgil sanders#roman#roman sanders#deceit sanders#deceit#remus#remus sanders#the duke#lamp#sanders asides spoilers#sanders sides spoilers#should i tag that?#kaiden speaks#my first reactions but also this was me rewatching it for the third time already
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GIVE US THE NEW WARRIORS HEADCANONS UR REDESIGNS ARE AMAZINGJAKMAKWJDKSLđđđ
aaaa omG thank you!! :âD Iâm actually strangely attached to these characters so Iâll try to do my best to explain the design choices I made and everything
ok so here we go.
SCREENTIME
* first off
* Not an entirely bad name??
* I would prefer Worm tho as a reference to the Morris Worm
* And I did make his design a little more wormy. Kinda Doc Ock-ish.
* So his tragic backstory... Well. Long long ago... when he was just a little kid... his dad fucked his mom.
* Jkjkjkjk. But it would be better than fucking âinternet gas.â
* To take this in a darker route, I think it would be cool if his grandad had been experimenting with creating cyborgs and turned his dad into one. And then turned Screentime into one. So Screentime escaped sort of half-finished and is just trying to help others who might mirror his situation of abuse.
* I like to think his first superhero story was he was just like fucking buying bulk ramen and then hears a dude harassing a girl in the next aisle over and is like. huh. word. guess I can intimidate this guy by threatening to take his fucking social security and make it public knowledge.
* Bc he can hook up to the internet and updates his database frequently so he can just Mr. Robot people.
* Heâs probably like 18 or 19. Never was schooled and college is kinda pointless when you have the whole internet in your brain.
* So heâs just living in a rundown apartment. Payin bills by doing odd jobs and doin bitcoin stocks.
* On the battlefield, heâd definitely be a mind games kind of guy, but heâd also use his worm limbs for dexterity and could probably discharge bursts of electricity at the cost of losing some information in his database.
* Also itâs probably really hard to tell, but Screentime is my favorite out of the original designs.
TRAILBLAZER
* again! Not a bad name at all!
* Made me think of fire though... and hiking... so
* We really donât have much information on these characters so they were kinda fun to play around w and I think she was my favorite in terms of concepts.
* Also what the fuck are those red things on her head am I just fucking dumb???
* They look like devil horns. So Iâm gonna run with it.
* Ok so she got a backpack from a god.
* Well that god was a god of Hell and also her godfather. Her actual father was another god of Hell. And idk how gods really work in the Marvel universe?? But I think thereâs probably at least some high-ranking demons of Hell. I think Hell exists??? If I remember Doctor Strange correctly? (Maybe not Doctor Strange... bro everything is so hard to keep up with)
* Anyway, her dad was killed by some hero traveling through Hell at some point probably. And so sheâs been preparing since to go avenge him.
* Then she gets to earth and is kinda like... well, avenging can wait.
* And the reason she canât just get anything she wants out of the backpacks is because the backpacks are alive. But over time as she gains their trust, they start to become more and more useful. So, like magikarp to gyarados.
* her outfit was so fucking hard to redesign. like,,, I still donât like it. The backpacks and stuff yes. Everything else no. But itâs better than the Neon Nightmare.
* Her powerset shouldnât be limited to just her backpacks though. I saw a lot of people complain about that. Bc anyone could steal them from her and use them?
* So I think she should have superhuman strength. Also, her backpacks should only respond to her command. Itâd be cute if they were also kinda cheeky about it. Bc yeah sheâs a spoiled little brat. But sheâs their spoiled little brat so theyâre not opening up for anybody but her.
* Sheâs defo the youngest of the group
* Even if she is an immortal demon kid lol
S
bro I canât even say it
Iâm renaming them Shuriken. Effective immediately.
SHURIKEN
* So Shuriken is non-binary. Which I think is really cool! Theyâre not the first non-binary character that Marvel has,, bc Loki exists,, but while theyâre not a good step forward... theyâre a step forward nonetheless and I kinda commend them for at least trying.
* But goddamnit why did they have to go and name them S
* Sn
* please donât make me say it
* So Shuriken has ice powers that are sort of threatening to take them over. Like if Iceman couldnât control his powers ig. Their powers sort of came to them mysteriously in the middle of them already having a gender crisis and high school is happening and all that blah and now theyâre just like,,, so ,, âsuperheroing seems to be a good venture right now. Maybe Iâll find myself in heroics and forget about everything elseâ
* And most of the heroic ideal is on their brother, ,,,, uh,,,, Quarterback,,, who idolizes the âclassicâ heroes like Cap, Iron Man, and Thor.
* Shuriken prefers reading news stories about Night Slasher and Punisher, Jessica Jones, and just generally, the other edgier heroes.
* But because their brother idolizes heroics so much, it makes it sort of a surprise when Shuriken takes up their mantle before Quarterback realizes anything is going on.
* And how does the ice stuff affect them? Theyâre sort of on the fence about finding a cure and whatnot. Most people speculate its like later-in-life mutation, but Shuriken isnât satisfied with this answer.
*they sometimes chop off the spiky ice parts for convenience(they have no feeling in the frozen over parts of their body)
*(Iâm toying with the idea of them having a crush on Ms. Marvel ngl)
QUARTERBACK
* not much to say about him? Other than goddamn that neon was terrible.
* Also Iâve seen jocks wear pink, so some youtube dudes complaining about that can fuck off. Maybe not that bright of a shade?
* But I figure with a defensive character, you would definitely want a bulkier frame. At least Power Man levels of a bulky frame? Like Iâm not talking Hulk or Thing. Just.. yknow. At least a good Cap size dude.
* Also a blockier costume would make sense. Since heâs supposed to be. Uh. Safe. For people to like,, crowd behind. Like a safe
* Like a safe sp
* Like a
* safespace.
* I also like to think he was sort of a stereotypical jock and then here comes his little sibling (by like,, 7 minutes) whoâs finally just like âyo fuck the gender spectrumâ and so he finally opens up to his own interests that heâs been burying
* Like the color coral
* Which is definitely not pink my dudiest of dudes ;)
* Heâs definitely more
* CHILL
* than Shuriken about the whole ice taking over his body thing. Like, at the end of the day, heâs still a jock even if he did turn out to be a mutant. Like , the world didnât just end because heâs got some cool ice powers
* Also only being able to create a shield if itâs for others?? What a fucking joke man come on
* He can create platforms of ice and just mainly uses the ice as shields.
B-NEGATIVE
* OK THIS IS MY SON
* not the original he kinda just looked like he took one look at Welcome to the Black Parade and said âI can do that outfit. But crappier.â
* Listen,,,, I constructed a son
* Itâs like that thing from that movie
* I was like
* âWe can rebuild him...â
* is that fucking robocop
* At any rate, yeah yeah, Morbius stuff is still withstanding
* What if
* And hear me out
* His parents were sort of antivax sort of anti-mutant sort of folk. They get into some sort of car accident when heâs kinda young. He gets a blood transfusion against his parentâs wishes and in the end also gets adopted by this weirdass doctor who probably has some nefarious purpose, considering he used Morbiusâ blood in the first place.
* This would explain how he could survive having vampirism since a doctor would probably have easier access to donated blood and stuff.
* Should the blood be going to people who actually need a transfusion? yes, however, this doctor is clearly ,, off his fucking rocker and corrupt as hell,, and what is his purpose?? The world may never know
* I donât think B-Negative cares about anything. Like he just seems like that kind of character? Totally and inherently aloof and selfish because heâs just been fed blood on a silver spoon his whole life?
* Just does not care
* He does care about music though. Specifically rock(alternative, punk, hard, etc) and the history of it.
* me personally I really like Pink Floyd and Iâm not going to,, shove my beliefs onto a character but
* Iâm going to shove my beliefs onto a character and say his favorite song of all time is probably Welcome to the Machine
* And he probably will not shut up about how righteous of a song it is and how pertinent the message is
* Bc I think it fits,,, a lot of things about the stuff Iâve wrote with the backstories of these characters
* and yes
* he can perfectly mimic Great Gig in the Sky. the man!! has pipes!!!
* I also think it would be cool if heâs the oldest of them? Like, younger than 21 but heâs out of high school. Just trying to get a bachelors in music history at fuckin uh. NYU probably.
* he unironically likes twilight
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Avengers: Endgame Spoiler Review/Thoughts and shit
(if you want me to add more tags to this, just comment or something and Iâll get on it ASAP)
Alright, so I saw Avengers: Endgame this morning. I guess this is going to be a review of sorts? Mostly just me typing out all my thoughts. So yeah, review, theories (ish?) and other things amongst all that.
 I did this last year for Infinity War and it was a huge mess. I decided to actually properly capitalise my words this time so itâs a bit more readable lmao. Iâve sort of had all day (12 hours) to really think about this so hopefully itâs a bit more coherent than my last yearâs mindless rambling? Iâm already rambling. Welp ;-;
 MAJOR SPOILERS UNDERNEATH CUT!! DO NOT PRESS READ MORE IF YOU DONâT WANT TO READ MORE.
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Everybody who doesnât want spoilers gone? This is your last chance.
  Ok, first things first, the movie is fucking amazing. There were so many instances where I cried, or laughed, or just really wanted to fucking scream because holy hell this movie was really intense. Honestly, I thought the humour managed to flow into the dramatic scenes really well. There was never a moment where I felt like a joke fell flat or came in at an inappropriate time.
 The feels. THE FEELS. The emotions. I can't. I was already sobbing by the time the first 20 minutes were over. A character appears on screen? Tears. Every single time there was a team shot? Tears. Somebody even opens their mouth to say something? Tears. But yeah, this movie made me an emotional wreck and I can't even.
 The movie starting off with Clint, and his family turning into dust? Expected, but still incredibly cruel, and still hurt a lot. Like, damn, I knew Endgame was going to be intense, but being reduced to tears in the first five minutes was incredibly unfair and just goddamned hurtful. Clint's dedication to his family was really sweet and I just garghhhhhhhhhh I loved it.
 So yeah. Character deaths. Natasha dying just about ruined my century, so thanks Marvel. I first started panicking when they said they were gonna get the stones, and Clint and Natasha were heading to Vormir. And then it kinda hit me that one of them was gonna have to sacrifice the other for the stone. And then the whole scene with Clint and Natasha trying to beat each other into throwing themselves off the cliff. Dumbasses. Why couldn't they both just live and nobody has to sacrifice anybody? And now I feel depressed again ;-; . On the other hand, I'm sort of happy that Natasha at least died feeling like she'd made amends for her past (she didn't have to she was already amazing :'(( ). Her character arc finished with her sacrifice and wow that's so depressing ;-;;; At least we get to see her in the Black Widow movie one last time? ;-;
 And Tony. I honestly didn't really think Marvel was going to go through with Tony's death tbh. I think it was probably one of the most depressing scenes I've had to witness with my own two eyes ever, and I definitely wasn't ready for it to happen. I fucking broke when Peter started crying and calling him 'Tony' because like, have we ever seen him refer to Tony as anything other than Mr Stark? I fucking lost it man. And Tony had Pepper, and he was married to her, and they had a little house by the lake, and a daughter (his daughter is so precious omg). And now he's dead and she'll grow up without her father I just fucking arGHHHHHHH. Honestly I just feel really attacked and hurt and this movie has ruined me. At least he got closure with his father. That was kinda a really sweet scene, and I cried at that too. I cried at fucking everything in this movie ;-;
 But yes, depressing scenes aside, can we just. Take a moment to talk about the final battle? Because that scene was absolutely splendid. I loved how every character got a couple seconds to themselves to just have a little hero moment, and how they did the whole girl power thing with the whole squad and they were so badass and I sort of teared up at that part too because they were all so amazing and I just love them so much and the only thing that would've made that scene better would be if Natasha had been with them but she can't because she's fucking dead oh my god.
 But when the portals opened up and all the characters stepped out of them. It looked fucking magical. I swear to God I had So Many Chills. It was just so fucking amazing to watch them all step out as one and yannoâŚâAvengers, Assemble!â. God bless them all. The audience lost their shit at this bit. Screaming and clapping and it was just absolutely breathtaking to see this scene. Like, there's just this energy, yanno? And the group shots. TâChalla leading his kingdom into the fight. Tony and Pepperâs really cute scene in their armour together. And, can we just take a break to talk about our fucking lord and saviour Steve Rogers? I love that boy so much holy shit. When Thor was about to die, and Mjolnir had flown in and hit Thanos, before flying off to the person who had thrown it. And itâs Steve Fucking Rogers, standing there holding Mjolnir? And he starts walking down the battlefield with his half broken shield in one hand and Mjolnir in the other? That was such a powerful image have I mentioned I fucking love Steve Rogers? But yeah, I love how they carried that on from AoU. But then that sort of begs the question: was Steve really able to lift Mjolnir in AoU but didnât because he didnât want to draw more attention to himself, or was he just not able to because he hadnât reached peak worthiness yet?
 Also, the whole New York scene was just amazing, fucking hilarious and just amazing. Who knew that all we needed to make a sequence great was to have a 100% necessary focus on Steve's ass? Jokes aside, it was really nostalgic seeing the whole 2012 New York battle again. I especially loved how they let us see parts that actually weren't in the movie, like the whole 'Avengers running into Pierce' thing. And how HYDRA got their hands on the sceptre. Seeing Steve do the whole 'Hail Hydra' thing to blend in kinda gave me chills lol. And Steve's fight with 2012!Steve was also really amazingly done and I fucking loved that sequence. The whole "I can do this all da-" "yeah yeAH I kNow I knOOW" was fucking hilarious tbh. (And also: "That is America's assâŚ")
Also, can I say that Steve was just really done with everything in this movie lmao. He was a solid fucking mood honestly. (âAre you shitting me??â â...heâs a baby.â â-.-â) And then his scene with Bucky at the end oh my goddd. âDonât do anything stupid.â âHow can I? Youâre taking all the stupid with you.â And honestly I sort of died right there...Itâs also this moment Iâm realising Bucky probably knew about Steveâs plans, because otherwise they wouldnât have said goodbye like that if Steve was only going to be gone for a bit. And Bucky wasnât panicked at all when Steve missed the jump back. So what, does that mean they planned for Steve to have his dramatic ass entrance back into the present by appearing besides the lake? Kind of a funny image lol. Anyway, Iâll stop talking about Steve lmao.
 Thor was fucking amazing in this movie tbh. His first scene in the future is hilarious, with the whole drunkard attitude and the beer gut and Korg playing fucking Fortnite Jesus Christ. His scene with Frigga in the movie also made me cry so much. It kinda made me realise he never really managed to get a proper goodbye with his mother before she died, yanno? And now he's finally getting it, and he can go on to the future with the knowledge that his mother is proud of him and believes he's a hero and afilajiopklgskl. Also, the pure joy when he finds out he's still worthy of Mjolnir? Such a sweet happy wholesome character despite all the losses he's gone through ;-; . Although, since he has decided to join the Guardians, does that mean he's going to be in Guardians of the Galaxy 3? And we know how there's been talk of a Thor 4 recently, right? It's probably just code for GOTG3 lol.
 And finally, Bruce Banner. It was really funny to see him emerge as a mix of himself and Hulk together, I'm not gonna lie. A lot of people in the audience started laughing when we saw the Hulk emerge in a sweater and jeans or whatever the hell he was wearing. But yeah, Bruce was great. When he volunteered himself to wield the Infinity Gauntlet v2.0? Legendary. But yeah, I honestly don't have much to say about Bruce honestly. Other than the fact that he dabbed at the beginning of the movie. Legendary. And when Scott spilled his tacos so Bruce offered him more with the purest smile on his face? I melted. Legendary.
 Anyway, miscellaneous thoughts time. I'm lowkey sort of kinda disappointed Nebula didn't get to kill Thanos? Like, I feel like, if anybody really deserved to kill that asshole, it was Nebula. She's suffered an entire life of torture and abuse from this dickhead, and has been manipulated by him so many times to do his dirty work. And how she still couldn't stop seeing him as a father figure in the end, despite all the terrible shit he's done to her? Actually, that's probably why she didn't get to kill him lol. And also, Sam Wilson is the new fucking Captain America bitches. I really fucking hoped that, if under any circumstances Steve had to give up his shield, it would go to Sam Wilson, because he fucking deserves it. Of course, I wouldn't have minded it going to Bucky, but my poor baby's already been through enough ;-; . Let him rest ;-; (but then, there's the whole Falcon and Winter Soldier show coming up fuck I'm so excited for it lmao).
 And also, Valkyrie. Is now. The new Queen of Asgard. I can't even. My baby girl deserves fucking everything :') She deserves the title of Queen so much and I'm so glad that's a new development. Hopefully we get to see more of her in the future and how she fares with the title of leader in Asgard :'D
 But yeah, I think that's about it for what I have on characters. So, moving on to theories and sort of plot holes I suppose?
 So, have we had any news on what the Loki show is going to focus on? I haven't really been paying enough attention to news on the shows tbh. But if nothing's been confirmed yet, I sort of have a theory. So we know how, when they're trying to get the Space Stone in New York, they fail and Loki gets away with the stone? I'm wondering if the TV show might potentially focus on what he does after he escapes New York with the stone. It's a possibility, I suppose.
 And now, finally, one of my biggestâŚannoyances (? I'm not sure this is the word I want to use but the only other word that's coming to mind is iffs which isn't even a real word so moving on) (edit: issues! I found the right word :D . The word I want to use is issues lol) with the movie is the last scene.Â
Steggy is a fucking blessed ship, and I love them, don't get me wrong. The plane scene in TFA and the hospital scene in TWS never fail to reduce me to a big sobbing fucking baby. And I'm so fucking happy that they finally got the dance that's been promised to them for so many decades. But the whole thing just doesn't really make sense to me.
 So basically, in the earlier parts of the movie, Bruce has already stated that time travel does not work like how we've all been trained to understand from other parts of pop culture. It's not quite travelling to the past, as nothing they do there will affect their future. What I interpreted from that (and I could be wrong, but this is my understanding) is that when they travel to the past, they end up creating a separate branch of events and shit that diverges from the timeline of events that will lead to their present. It doesn't erase their present, but just sort of forms a permanent branch, you feel? So, Steve travelling back to the past in order to live his life with Peggy only to end up in their present again brought in a huge amount of plot holes.
 For Steve to have lived a life with Peggy and marry her, that would mean events would change drastically. I doubt they got married in secret, so people must've known 'Steve' was alive and OK. Would that mean the search for the past Steve that's still frozen in the Arctic stop, since they're all assuming he's alive? If that happens, that means the Tesseract would've never been found, and that would've led to a whole bunch of other events that would definitely not allow for grandpa Steve to join up again with the MCU's present timeline, as it would've brought him into a different branch instead.
 But, hypothetically, let's say Steve lives with Peggy in secret. They get married in secret, nobody knows he's still alive, they continue with the search, yadda yadda. Now, since Steve is from the future, he would know that SHIELD is being infiltrated by HYDRA, and that Bucky would still be alive and is currently being the Winter Soldier and doing assassin-y shit. And I really, really, highly doubt that Steve would just live a life with Peggy and not interrupt with any of this shit. It's just so against his nature to ignore all of this? So, let's say he does root out HYDRA. That would affect the future. TWS, and everything afterwards would've never happened. So it definitely wouldn't be possible for Steve to return to the MCU's current, present timeline if he lived out his life, as he would've been, once again, on a different, permanently separated branch.
 Let's say, hypothetically, he lived with Peggy in secret. Nobody knew he was alive. He knew HYDRA was growing inside SHIELD and didn't do anything. He knew his best friend was being tortured and brainwashed for decades and didn't do anything. Even then, him just living with Peggy and marrying her would've changed all the events and wouldn't have allowed him to just let his branch converge with the present MCU timeline without messing around with some serious science and shit (which is all highly unlikely tbh).
 So basically, what I'm trying to say is, the whole last scene is fucked and can't have happened without saying 'fuck-it-all' to the rules established in the movie. But yeah, that was just the one and only glaring issue to me I couldn't stop thinking about. But either way, I loved the way the movie ended with the Steggy scene. It was really beautiful and sweet and just everything we could've wanted for their dance :')) . It was also a really bittersweet sort of tone to end the film on? Absolutely gorgeous.Â
(edit: wow OK so I made a whole separate post just for this scene because a couple days after I posted this, I realised my thoughts and feelings towards this scene had changed and I had a lot more to say about it. So. Yeah. Here it is.)
 But anyway. Shit. That's it. I've spent this whole past year thinking about this movie and waiting for it, and now that I've watched it and it's over, I don't know what I'm going to do with myself. This whole day, I've been feeling incredibly empty honestly. I'm still not quite over Natasha and Tony, and I don't think I'll ever be (which, by the way. Marvel, I'll be sending you the bill for all the emotional trauma you've caused.) But this movie was a bloody masterpiece, and I fucking loved it. The trip down memory lane with the time travel was honestly so incredibly implemented. I was really worried when I realised time travel was going to be involved with this movie, because it introduces a device that can retcon everything and just basically takes away the emotional impact of every event that happens because you can just time travel. But the fact that they introduced the mechanic where you can't affect the past by travelling there does close that issue up. Well done. Very clever.
 But, yeah. Fuck. It's over. 11 years, and it went out with a bang. I honestly have no idea how Marvel is gonna top this for the next era. It seems almost impossible, honestly. I just really hope they do, because I would hate to have a franchise as amazing as the MCU end up fizzling out because their most impressive movie came years before the end and they end up never being able to top it. But these are probably just irrational worries.
 Anyway, final score. 14000605/1. Would definitely watch again. Just not immediately. I still haven't fully digested the movie, and I still feel really empty and full of emotions at the same time even though it's been more than 12 hours since I've seen the movie. So yeah. Imma wait a bit, and then I'll probs rewatch it.
 Anyway, rant over. Hope you enjoyed, I guess? I nearly burst into tears so many times trying to write this fucking thing. If you've seen the movie, feel free to DM me. I'm always up to chat with people lol. And if you haven't seen the movie, what the fuck are you doing reading this? Go watch the damned movie. Christ.
 I might end up making edits to this if I think up of more things to talk about. Or maybe I'll make a separate post. I'll probs make a separate post. But anyway. Farewell, y'all. Time to go hide under my blankets and cry until Far From Home comes out.
 (Also, this thing is 3069 words. Wow. Jesus Christ. If I put this amount of effort into my assignments, Iâd be bringing in straight As. Oops.)
#avengers endgame#marvel#mcu#avengers#endgame#endgame spoilers#avengers endgame spoilers#mcu meta#mcu spoilers#marvel spoilers#avengers: endgame#avengers: endgame spoilers#spoilers#spoiler#mcu spoiler#marvel spoiler#avengers endgame spoiler#endgame spoiler#avengers spoiler#i've typed out the word spoilers so many times it's sort of lost all meaning
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LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING [SOMETHING ABOUT YOURSELF]
pairing: eddie kaspbrak/richie tozier chapter count: 1/5 summary: eddie kaspbrak runs an advice blog online, and he finds that maybe heâs starting to develop feelings for the cute, regular anon he gets gushing about their crush. meanwhile, richie tozier opens up his heart about falling in love to an anonymous advice blogger. read on ao3.
Eddie wondered if it was a little sad how excited he got when the message in his inbox started with a little purple heart emoji. Because his little heart definitely jumped in his chest every time he saw it at the front, and that message always got instant priority over whatever else was in his inbox.
omg cute boy did the most perfect thing today. i dont even have a genuine question here, or anything i just need to express how perfect this tiny human is and i think all my friends are tired of hearing about gfhdlgfhakjahsjlga i wanna hold his stupid tiny hand.
Eddie smiled to himself, clicking on the reply button. The past few weeks, Eddieâs spur of the moment advice blog had suddenly gained a ridiculous amount of popularity after a screenshot of one his posts had made its way onto a Buzzfeed article. With all the new followers, a great influx of messages had come along as well. Including this specific purple heart emoji anon, who seemed to be completely and utter smitten with somebody who worked in the same place as he did. And Eddie well, maybe Eddie was a little in love with how in love his anon was. Or maybe he wanted somebody to love him that much.
âGood moooooorning, beautiful!â
Eddie startled, quickly slamming the lid of his computer down. His advice blog was a top secret of his, the only person who knew he did was his best friend from high school, Mike. Theyâd both made blogs back in the early years of high school, and Eddie had clung to his as a perfect escape from the bullshit of the real world. He didnât think Mike still used it, but he was the only person who knew that Eddie used his. And what he used it for.
Richie worked at the Starbucks across from Eddieâs store in the mall, and heâd seemed to latch onto Eddie on his very first day on the job. They were both college students trying to make ends meet with part time jobs when they werenât in their classes or sleeping, and Richie had declared them kindred spirits. That had been almost two years earlier, and Eddie had officially been selling skinny jeans and sweaters to teenager girls for way too long.
âSure slammed that shut pretty quick,â Richie commented with a small whistle. He raised his eyebrow and cocked his lips up into half a grin. His small overbite was barely obvious from that smile, but it was still annoying adorable. Eddie supposed that must things were annoyingly adorable about Richie Tozier. âAre you looking at porn on the job, Kaspbrak? Or do you just have deep dark hidden secret out there on the Internet?â
Eddie flushed. âYouâre not supposed to be behind the counter.â
Richie held his hands up in defense, each one holding a Starbucks cup and rolled his eyes. âFine. Iâll just take your iced coffee back over to work and dump it out then.â
âYouâll do no such thing!â Eddie cried, flopping forward in his chair to make grabby hands at smaller cup. Richie let out a laugh and handed the drink to Eddie, tucking his own empty hand into the back pocket of his jeans.
Eddie took a sip of the drink and let out a loud sigh. Richie had perfected his drink to the point where Eddie wouldnât go to Starbucks if Richie wasnât working. On the nice days when Richieâs shift started before Eddieâs, Eddie wouldnât have to get up and get it himself at all. âAre you done now?â Eddie asked, glancing at the clock on the wall behind him. It was a little after noon, a bit early for Richie to be finished his shift but he knew that Richie did like to take shorter shifts during exam season.
âNah. Not done until three.â Richie said, sipping at his red-coloured, syrupy iced drink that Eddie was never brave enough to ask what was in it. âIâm going on my break. Want to go see the outside world with me and remember what itâs like to be free?â
Eddie clucked his tongue, and turned on the chair to look at his coworker, Kay. âIs it okay if I go on my break now?â It was a little early to Eddie to take a break, and he knew heâd probably regret it later when he had to move through the last several hours of his shift in one go, but he was still going to jump at the chance.
Kay looked up from the binder of the summer sales that were coming in, and smirked as she caught sight of Richie standing with Eddie. âYeah, weâre completely dead,â Kay replied. âIâm not sure why Barb insists on scheduling two people in the middle of the day when our entire target audience is in school.â
âK thanks!â Eddie jumped down from the chair, sticking his tongue out at Kay as Richie turned around. He supposed that his raging crush on the lankier guy hadnât exactly been subtle over the last year or so, but it was subtle enough that Richie hadnât seemed to notice and that was what mattered in the long run.
He remembered how annoyed heâd been when heâd realized that heâd fallen for the stupid barista boy like a goddamn internet cliche. But then again, Eddie had never claimed to be anything more than an Internet cliche, so what the point in fighting it? Heâd let himself fall full forward into liking Richie, and found that he enjoyed Richie even more than heâd originally realized. Once he stopped fighting his crush, and let himself genuinely find Richie funny and amusing, life became so much lighter.
Richie jumped up onto the curb stop once theyâd gotten outside, and swung his leg around while drinking from the red drink of death. âSo... are you going to invite me to Mikeâs party this weekend?â
Eddie raised one eyebrow, a challenge. âIâm assuming that since youâre asking about it, that Mike has already asked you.â
âWell, yeah.â Richie huffed, but he was still smiling. âBut you didnât ask me, Eddie. And that hurts. I thought we were lovers.â
Eddie rolled his eyes, but he knew that he was blushing. âI donât know whatever gave you that idea, Richard, but Iâll have you know that I didnât invite anybody to this party. Because itâs Mikeâs party, for his weird fuckboy boyfriend. I just happen to live in the same house as that party. Iâll be spending it in my room, probably watching re-runs of the Office with Chinese food.â
Richie jumped off the curb and landed in front of Eddie. âWell then- invite me to that.â
Eddie narrowed his eyes. âYou want to spend your Saturday night sitting alone with me watching the Office?â
âMy favourite show with my favourite boy?â Richie reached out and pinched Eddieâs cheeks. Eddie swatted him away with a grumble. âHonestly, I couldnât think of anything Iâd rather do on Saturday. Itâs not like Iâd be drinking anyway.â
Eddie nodded, knowing all about Richieâs long and poor history with alcohol that had peaked the year before theyâd met. Still though... parties seemed like something Richie enjoyed, as somebody who thrived on social environments. âYou're welcome to come over and watch the Office with me,â Eddie said with small smile. âAnd I promise I wonât be offended when you ditch me for the music and chatter of half the school in my tiny living room.â
Richie tossed an arm around Eddieâs shoulder and pulled him into him. âI would never ditch my Eds!â
xxx
âI swear,â Richie said, gesturing towards Eddieâs small bedroom television set. They were both laying together, Eddieâs small enough that they were pressed together from top to bottom. It wasnât the first time theyâd been seated in Eddieâs bed like this, but it made Eddieâs heart race everytime. âIt takes Pam and Jim longer to get together every time I want this show.â
Eddie let his head lull to the side, crinkling up his nose. He, personally, could barely hear the show over the raging music from the party outside the walls. Mike had promised to try and keep it down for them, but Eddie hadnât really expected much. âThey get together in the same episode every time.â
âYes, Edward.â Richie rolled his eyes, letting his hand come down and start to fiddling with the rainbow pride rope bracelet that Eddie always wore on his left wrist. âIn my old age, I just find myself a little less tolerant of all this slowburn. Theyâre obviously soulmates, why must we sit through so much bullshit when they should just have gotten together at the start?â
Eddie chuckled, hoping Richie couldnât feel his blood rushing under his hold on his wrist. âI like the slowburn. Itâs interesting, you know? Two people who obviously right for each other but had to the get the timing right too. Thatâs the whole part of it. I think Jim and Pam wouldnât have been nearly as interesting and powerful as couple if theyâd gotten together right at a beginning and never had to like... really go through it together.â
âI just donât think love should always have to be such a struggle.â Richie said, moving on from playing with Eddieâs bracelet to simply rubbing at Eddieâs wrist. âWhy canât just once I see a couple get together and then nothing bad ever happens, the end.â
Eddie smiled softly. âWhy, Richard Tozier, I didnât know you were such a closet romantic.â
âThereâs lots you donât know about me, Eds.â Richie tilted his head back down and smiled at him. Eddie blinked sleepily at him, letting his smile turn slightly confused. Richie let out a sigh. âLike, uh... I probably never told you this, but I think the best decision I ever made was going over to talk to you that day when you surrounded by all those preteens that were freaking out that you guys were sold out of those new Kardashian jeans.â
Eddie groaned, head falling into Richieâs neck. He told himself he imagined that Richieâs seemed to jump underneath him at the pressure of Eddieâs body.âOh my God, that was the worst fucking day.â
âWow,â Richie chuckled, moving Eddieâs body with his. Richie had always been a touchy feely friend, but Eddie didnât think theyâd ever been this close. âGuess Iâll just die.â
âObviously the only good part of the day was the big gangly losers coming over and handing me a coffee even thought heâd never met and wasnât sure how I even took it.â Eddie laughed, shifting so he could look at him, chin resting on Richieâs chest.
âHey.â Richie waggled his eyebrows. âI made a wicked iced coffee that day.â
âIt was edible.â Eddie said dryly. âBut I think I was so high on anxiety, you could have handed me hot piss in a cup and I wouldâve drank it without a second thought.â
âThatâs disgusting,â Richie laughed, leaning in to press a quick kiss to Eddieâs forehead. âI thought I was supposed to be the disgusting one.â
Eddieâs entire face flushed. âYouâre not that disgusting.â
Something odd and soft came over Richieâs face, and he was leaning closer... closer... Eddie took in a shaky breath, closed his eyes...
A loud crash, followed by Mike swearing, broke them apart. Eddie rolled his eyes and paused the show. âWant to help me kick some ass?â
âEvery single person in that room could kill me with one punch,â Richie replied, smiling cheekily. âBut I would happily die in a fight for my Eddie Spaghetti.â
âOh my God, fucking gross, how many times do I need to tell you not to call me that?â
âAt least once more, apparently.â
xxx
After Richie and the party guests had all gone home, Eddie quickly logged into his blog and clicked onto his ask box. Right at the top was a message from the purple heart.
fuck i almost kissed the cutie today! he seemed into it but this stupid party interrupt it and now im like??? do i try to kiss him again or was i over thinking it? ah ah ah pls send help. i need a whole army of strong men to carry me through this.
Eddie frowned.
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Part 9 of my reaction/commentary to the Phantoms & Mirages fanfic series by @renegadewangs
(Chasing Phantoms): Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
(Haunted Specters): Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6
(Vanquishing Mirages): Part 7 | Part 8
Welp. This is gonna be very painful for me on sooo many levels.
Hooo I kinda feel like Iâm playing directly with fire in this post.
Now, itâs worth calling attention to the fact that these reaction/commentary posts are, first and foremost, built on my reactions to the source material. They are recounting the journey I, personally, went through as I read this series â thatâs why I focus so much on my feelings and what I thought. There is more objective analysis at times, but itâs not the primary focus. Just in case youâre wondering why Iâm focusing on myself so much and might get a little âomg can u shut up about urself and just get back to the story already???â pff. (And besides, more objective analysis is always inevitably filtered through the individualâs thoughts/mindset/perspective/preferences/etc anyway. So Iâm basically just not even trying to tune any of that stuff out, as one would inevitably have to for a more proper series of reviews.) Ah⌠I hope reading in such depth about my personal rollercoaster journey is at least somewhat interesting. And not too boring.
âŚYes, at the very least, I hope this post makes for a SOMEWHAT entertaining read.
That was part of my goal. Other than honesty to the point of self-sabotage.
Vanquishing Mirages, Chapter 18
Thereâs a whole bunch of small things I could comment on in this chapter but Iâm going to gloss over them instead. I⌠canât bring myself to dwell too much on the âside-thingsâ in this post, really.
So. The image of the phantom, sitting with his head in his hands as Bobby and Palaeno dote over him while the phantom just irritably tries to wave them off is just, everything to me. xDDDD One of my faaaaavourite things. And then the phantom just leaping to his feet like that⌠The entire scene I could just go on and on about it at length⌠But I wonât. xDDDD The best game of âhow much of an uncomfortable situation and awkwardness can we possibly apply to our dear spy â having other characters dote to the point of it being outright patronising â and how will this near-emotionless man respond to such outside forces?â
Okay actually, I will ramble just a Little. âBobby and phantom = mother and childâ is one of my favourite dynamics in this whole series. Bobby in this scene is just No. 1 Mum and itâs aaaall of my yes. So the phantom is forced to play the role of the child once more at this point in the chapter. The reality is that heâs a convicted criminal and therefore cannot be trusted on his own, hence requiring a bathroom escort. But he might as well be a helpless little child who requires adult supervision, as is the norm with children â this is the other amusing lens through which you can joke about Blackquill needing to lead the way there for him.
With that, Simon turned and led the way towards the door. The Phantom followed, as obedient as could be, and Fulbright looked like he was about to do the same.Â
The âas obedient as could beâ gets me every damn time, ahahaha. Because it really feels to slot him firmly into that âchildâ role. Being a good little child. For now. His major modes seem to be âobedient childâ (e.g. âSam Specterâ doing the dishes in Haunted Specters if you wanted to push it) and of course the classic âpetulant childâ.
âAm I still meant to thank you for saving my life?â âWould it have even the slightest shred of sincerity to it?â Simon questioned. âOf course not.â âThen, no.â
THIS IS RIGHT UP THERE WITH SOME OF MY FAVOURITE PHANTOM EXCHANGES IN THIS SERIES.
âA fool, but not worthy of the title Fool Bright. Isnât that right?â The Phantom managed some sort of failed echo of a smile. A smile that wouldnât convince anyone who saw it. The words struck Simon as odd. Before the Phantom regained his memories, he would choose Fulbrightâs side and use an almost defensive attitude to protect the man. Now that the lost year had returned to him, things seemed different.
Just. Shoot me. Please.
So I guess. Maybe heâs still trying to determine if Simon might be hurt the same way heâs sure Bobby will be?? I guess??? Perhaps⌠his words arenât so much about how the name âFool Brightâ impacts him personally, but from his perspective⌠Simon calling him âFool Brightâ could imply that capacity for him to get deeply hurt by the phantomâs death, that Simon might also have some kind of attachment to him like Bobby does but is less obvious about it, and the phantom obviously doesnât want that. So I guess his goal here⌠is possibly trying to determine if Simon has any sentimentality towards him that also needs to be stomped out for Simonâs own sake??
âYou need to watch your tongue, Phantom. One might almost accuse you of being jealous.â
Me: um dude did he just. Go there? Did Simon really just- nah that canât be right, Iâm just reading things into his words that arenât there you know-
âYour relationship? You believe I hold romantic or even sexual interest in you?â
Me: OH. OH OKAY. SO I GUESS WEâRE JUST? I GUESS SIMON REALLY WENT THERE HUH AND THE BOTH OF THEM ARE JUST NOT SHYING AWAY FROM THIS TOPIC OF CONVERSATION. THEYâRE JUST MEETING THIS TOPIC HEAD-ON. WELL. OKAY THEN!
The sheer level of whiplash that this turn in their conversation had on me- I had literally only just been joking with my friend about the parent-child dynamics present among the trio from EARLIER ON IN THE SAME CHAPTER as Iâd been reading through it.
The scene just. Ends on that line. Wild enough on its own.
And then it. Bobby. The next scene. H. And then the ffffffffffffff
Chapter end.
Me:
âDOES ANYBODY WANNA TELL ME WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED???????â
And on that absolutely wild note, Vanquishing Mirages draws to a firm close. It was a little bit strange that this scene never gets revisited or expanded upon moving forward, but thatâs no matter. Iâm sure it was an innocent writing oversight. At least this fic managed to go out with a huge bang! Turns out that thanks to Simon, the phantom had been saddled with unnecessary feelings! Hahaha, what do you know! Sooo, that about wraps it up for me and my reaction/commentary/review for this post folks, I wish anyone reading this all the best! So next up, we have Lifting Spirits! Going into Lifting Spirits, the title already has a positive touch to it, and well, weâll just have to see what else it has in store. Cya!
     Ah⌠I guess this post is a little short to just leave it at that then, isnât it? Very well. Continuing on with the very next chapter that happens immediately after this one, as we begin the new fic:
Lifting Spirits, Chapter 1
He was just watching a documentary on the Tasmanian masked owl when the doorbell rang.
Hahaha omg that is such a Simon thing to do
A bit irksome, but then again, he was fairly sure heâd already seen this footage before.
Dfkjsfjksdf BIG NERD. BIRD NERD.
THE WHIPPED CREAM AND CHOCOLATE SAUCE COMMENT FROM BOBBY djdjnk GOODNESS ME. I wonder if weâll get any further allusions to what his relationship with Domestique was, ahem, possibly like in future!
And thereâs also th
    OKAY FINE.
    [sigh] FIIIIINE.
Finishing the Chapter 18 review then.
Well my first incredulous reaction was something like, âAre you⌠serious. Did we not just spend like⌠Two entire fics playing around with the notion that âBlackquill is Basically the phantomâs dadâ???? And then you turn around and do this? HOW IS THE READER SUPPOSED TO FEEL ABOUT THIS? NARRATIVE CAN YOU MAKE UP YOUR MIIIIND? ARE YA REALLY GONNA MAKE A PLAY AT THIS AFTER ALL THE PARENTAL DYNAMICS THAT WERE INTRODUCED?
Itâs⌠Oh my god.
But then again.
It wasnât like these themes hadnât been introduced before. The first fic in the series felt so far away, out of reach, and from so long ago (and Iâve already gone over how separated it felt from the rest of the story on first readthrough so I neednât do so again)⌠But I had some vague recollections you know. The main thing that stood out to me was Blackquillâs confrontation with the phantom before the phantom allowed himself to fall from the apartment window. Where Blackquill basically Trump Cards the phantom with âHa! Youâre totally into me!â and the phantom went âoh god youâre rightâ and was soooo ruined over the idea that he was apparently ATTRACTED TO SOMEONE that he was like whew! Think Iâll be taking my leave now and never seeing or needing to speak to you or anyone else again, so great is my mortification! And then he went BYE BYE out the window, the end. Thatâs Totally what happened, right? And even if thatâs not exactly how the scene went, I knew, for some reason(s) that I couldnât quite remember at the time, that the phantom having a Thing for Simon during the first fic was indisputable. (WE WILL GET TO THAT).
And the thing thatâs been preventing this being brought up this entire time? The memory loss. And whatâs no longer an issue? The memory loss. It was paaaaainfully obvious that things were different once the phantom regained those memories. The entire parental dynamic wherein the phantom was positioned as being Simonâs son was all set up purely in Haunted Specters, during the memory loss phase. But if I looked at it this way, I took it as âfactâ that phantom was into Simon in some way or another prior to the memory loss. All of the weird parental projection stuff seemed to only come after that, while the memories of the missing year were gone. And IF THOSE MEMORIES HAD NOW RETURNED⌠It makes sense thatâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚ
There would be some kind of reversion back toâŚâŚâŚâŚ
So could this fic compartmentalise it like that, then? And we are to leap from the parental realm now that the memories are returned, and straight into⌠this? Hmm. But this alone was not enough. There were a couple of other things, too.
See, Iâve already alluded to/essentially stated this previously, but⌠That scene just before the phantom allows himself to fall from the window? On first readthrough, at the time, I didnât even particularly like it or truly appreciate it. And then, we come full circle, back to when I had all my pesky little âdoubtsâ about how the phantomâs character was handled in the first fic, finally catching up to me for my full re-evaluation.
I hadnât really bought the one-sided phantomquill during fic 1. It was one of those doubts from back then. It just hadnât stuck at the time.
Would it stick now?
Letâs talk a bit about phantomquill.
Well, phantomquill has never been my primary focus. My primary focus has always been the phantom (in Dual Destinies content, anyway). If given the choice, Iâd prefer to just have content that has the phantom in it. Not really phantomquill stuff, although phantomquill can certainly be interesting to think about, it was never really a priority or a preference for me.
Except⌠Almost all phantom-focused content usually seems to be inherently phantomquill in nature. Which is fine! It would be nice to just have some neutral phantom stuff, but it looked like phantomquill was the default. The prerequisite, almost, if someone was gonna have a focus on the phantom in their story. And I didnât mind. But Iâd probably equally enjoy said stories regardless of whether the phantomquill was there or not.
So I guess Iâm always kinda inclined to just shrug and go âI GUESS?â when phantomquill comes along. But I had, however, become waaay more fond of phantomquill over the years. It still wasnât much of a preference but Iâd certainly gained an appreciation for it and quite enjoyed thinking about it at times.
And obviously, obviously, from how the last two scenes are set-up â the suspiciously sudden jumpcut between them, I knew there had to be more to what was going on. I knew there probably had to be missing lines that got exchanged that the audience hadnât seen yet, leading up to/into what Bobby walks in on.
But regardless of what those lines were⌠The outcome would be the same, wouldnât it? So what difference could the conversationâs direction possibly make? Things, in one way or another, from how their conversation continues, must have gotten out of h- well. Spiralled into what Bobby sees the phantom doing!!
And I was also amused because HMM⌠THIS WHOLE SCENARIO⌠WHEREIN A BLOND PHANTOM⌠KISSES SIMON, COMMITTING A TERRIBLE MISTAKE IN THE PROCESS OF DOING SO⌠ALMOST SEEMS FAMILIAR, SOMEHOW.
But actually, thereâs really no harm in that. Thereâs absolutely nothing wrong with fanfics containing similar scenarios playing out with their own differences added into the mix. Itâs FUN and EXCITING to see different authors handle somewhat similar situations in their own ways. If anything, it should be encouraged.
So could I really accept this scene playing out in THIS fic in all its terrific absurdity? One of the important questions for that was, did it feel âearnedâ in any way?
I found myself thinking back to previous Vanquishing Mirages chapters, as covered in the last post. About how, back then, I was thinking how this was âpeak phantomquillâ and how if thereâs any way phantomquill should be, it was this. Even back then, I inadvertently found myself glancing at the ficâs tags. âNo phantomquill tag? No phantomquill tag? Huh⌠well okay then. I guess the author doesnât think itâs phantomquill if itâs not âromanticâ in nature and/or only remains subtext. Thatâs fair enough.â To look at those scenes⌠To think back to the first fic⌠And look at it all through a phantomquill lensâŚâŚ It did feel kinda earned to me.
And you even warned me, in your own way. âOriginally planned to have one-sided phantomquill.â ORIGINALLY. Thatâs essentially what you told me, isnât it? Aaaand that confused me for the longest time. Honestly. I read through Chasing Phantoms like â???? âOriginallyâ how? This one-sided phantomquill is uh, PRETTY SOLIDLY CANON IMO.â I just figured you meant âone-sided phantomquill that wasnât just subtextâ or âway more obviousâ. Figured that in your opinion, if it only ever remained subtext yet still clearly there, well it wasnât proper phantomquill then was it?
And then when I read this chapter, I was just like⌠(AND EVEN MESSAGED MY FRIEND BASICALLY SAYING THIS):
âTHIS FIC ISNâT EVEN TAGGED AS PHANTOMQUILL W H A Tâ
(HOOTY HOOO PAST ME THEREâS A REASON FOR THAT).
But it just made me think, âOh, well. I guess the only reason the author would tag something as âphantomquillâ ever is if the pairing becomes canon then? Which it obviously never will here. Therefore thereâs no tag for it.â
Now, Iâd like to draw your attention to something I wrote in a recent reply of mine to you:
âNot to mention that I loved the courtroom jokes bit so much that, once I decided to let myself enjoy it and accept it, my Willing Suspension of Disbelief was strengthened tenfold and was ready to take just about anything you would throw at it. (And you sure were ready to throw stuff at me and had more up your sleeve!). I gave the story even more leeway to work with willingly, because everything was so perfect and I wanted my suspension of disbelief to have plenty of leeway to fully enjoy EVERYTHING. NO MORE INNER KILLJOY. I knew I could trust in the narrative because it was so strong.â
I guess this was a huge part of my downfall.
I looked at this set-up the chapter left us with â one-sided, inevitably angsty phantomquill, thought back on everything and what it came down to was⌠couldnât I just accept it, just like Iâd accepted things like the joke-telling? Did I want to? Did I enjoy this scenario?
âŚYeah. Yeah, I realised with a bit of surprise that I did. I REALLY, REALLY DID, ACTUALLY. And I wanted to accept it. My inner killjoy was cast aside. It was tiiiime to just enjoy this perfect âangstâ or whatever youd call it.
It didnât matter how ridiculous it may be. When it comes to fanfiction⌠the sky tends to be the limit. Itâs precisely where you can see little fantasies like this one played out. Itâs⌠Itâs⌠If thereâs any place this kind of scenario could happen, for sure. This was it. The best thing to do is just⌠enjoy it for what it is.
Almost everything had primed me to thinking that⌠This was indisputable one-sided phantomquill, was it not? And if just about every phantom-heavy fic out there seems to have some phantomquill in it, itâs only natural that this one would too, right? There was nothing driving me to question it. And accepting it just made me ridiculously happy and excited. Yeah, itâs âangstyâ and one-sided, but it made me so dang happy nonetheless.
And if this wasnât bad enough.
I went on to make a number of other mistakes that proved to be very, very fatal.
I read this chapter after midnight. And it was sooo much to process, and I wanted to be fully awake to process whatever was coming next⌠And it was just way too late at night. I figured, I wouldnât be able to handle whatever was coming next⌠I needed to sleep. I needed to⌠save it for tomorrow. And it was too late to read another chapter anyway.
âŚOh, if only I had read on⌠I could have spared myself so much. If I had just gone straight from this chapter into the next one⌠I wouldâve been mostly fine. Nothing would have truly had a chance to sink in and my misconception would have been quickly cleared up. I wouldâve been pretty much fine, Iâm sure. I would have likely suspended judgement and saved myselfâŚ
It really is the kiss itself that was the killing blow, too. If the chapter had only, if it had only ended at the phantomâs last line, and Bobbyâs segment saved for the next chapter, I would have EASILY maintained plausible deniability and would have been spared. Even when Blackquill and phantomâs conversation turned in that direction, I had NOT made ANY concrete assumptions.
But what actually happened was.
I turned my computer off,
And went to sleep.
And ohhhhhh boy.
I was very excited to find out how the narrative would continue in the next chapter. Especially how the prose of the text itself would approach it. Naturally, there was going to be immediate fallout.
But the narrative patterns of this series so far also fooled me. One thing was clear: the audience was to find out what happened during the jumpcut from Blackquillâs to Bobbyâs POV in the next chapter.
And WHOSE perspective is missing, that is normally left until last? Was it not evident�
So it seems like my mind couldnât help brainstorming, and seems my dreams were like, âOh, what if the prose was like this, starting with this sentence, and thenâŚâ
Haah.
So you see, when I woke up the next morning, I had these lines of prose fresh in my mind! And I really liked them, actually! I couldnât let them go to waste! I had to write them downâŚ!
Yep. Itâs terribly embarrassing to admit. But I wrote my own little snippet of a sequel before reading the next chapter. âI can compare, see how the next chapter actually goesâŚ!â I thought to myself naively.
Which brings us toâŚ
Vanquishing Mirages, Chapter 19
Finally, I eagerly open the next chapter to read and it was justâŚ
I donât think Iâve ever been more thoroughly played by a piece of fiction in my entire life.
There was that time I was reading a book and one of the beloved characters that I was deeply attached to was very clearly dying. Their death had been one of the possibilities I had been DREADING even before starting the book. Itâs a little bit hard to stay alive when thereâs a sword lodged in you like that, you know? Their consciousness was slipping away by the moment. I couldnât read on through my tears. I had to pause reading and pull myself together to push on.
âŚAnd when I did? The character suddenly, recovered on the next page. And was fine. Because hereâs the thing: said character was a zombie. But like, a weird kind of âaliveâ zombie which could still die I guess. Had the sword remained firmly lodged in him, chances are he would have actually died. But another character â devastated over this characterâs impending death, 100% sure it was about to happen, pulled the sword out. And then, what do you know? The character sat up again and was like âlol wait Iâm actually feeling a lot better now lol⌠well I guess thatâs being a zombie for you huh.â
Hah. Well. Thatâs one example that comes to mind and at least, in this case⌠the bait and switch was actually going from one thing I desperately didnât want â to something I actually desperately wanted. For the character to live, or âliveâ as a perfectly conscious zombie.
There is another example that comes to mind, a little bit closer to home, which involves⌠ship baiting.
I like to think that it is very hard to make me fall for ship baiting. Sure, I ship things that arenât canon in media. And I do so with the full knowledge that they arenât canon and will most likely never be canon. I keep those two realms nice and separate and therefore my feelings never get hurt. I never get too invested to the point of becoming upset⌠And I can tell, usually, what is sheer shipbaiting and what constitutes actual, canon evidence.
So there was one piece of media I was into, where two male characters were shipped with each other from the very start by the fandom, even before they ever interacted with each other. Then they actually started interacting and their dynamic was awesome, they cared for and were looking out for each other. So the shipping of the two characters only heightened dramatically in the fandom, naturally. Now, everyone was getting invested, but I looked at these two characters and went⌠âyeah, sure, I would love to see them get together, so I ship it.â But I figured, you know, it was never gonna actually happen, so I didnât get too invested. I thought, yeah⌠the writers are deeefinitely throwing in some intentional bait with those two that they will never actually follow through on. So I didnât get invested.
But then something happened that changed everything for me⌠One of those two characters got 100% confirmed, beyond a shadow of any doubt, to be canonically in love with the other, in the media itself, undeniably. I always usually look for plausible deniability to cover my bases. Thatâs what ship baiting relies on. But there was no way around the concrete fact that this character was in love with the other.
And in that piece of media, there was no canon reason, absolutely none, why those two characters couldnât get together. And if Character Aâs canonically in love with Character B⌠there were MOUNTAINS of evidence that Character B felt the same way. If anything, if I had to take a blind guess at who was in love with who, I would have figured it was Character B way more than Character A.
Well, the writers messed up and stuffed around and played with its audience. They wanted to keep baiting this ship, they introduced very transparent & pointless roadblocks as to why they couldnât be together only after the fact of one of the characterâs feelings revealed, and yeah, turns out the other character doesnât feel the same way back. They employed just plain bad writing to introduce pointless drama and turned the previously inseparable pair against each other.
Nooow that hurt a lot because I was shipping something that, for all intents and purposes canonically speaking, could've been on the verge of becoming a reality. Before the writers decided to add unnecessary complications and reveal that the other character never felt that way. I got really invested and it turned out to be blatant baiting and, yeah.
Well the example in your fic is obviously very different from that one on a number of fronts. The example just provided was baiting the ship becoming canon. The example in your series is merely baiting the notion that a character had a specific type of feeling(s) for another. In some ways that made it all the more crushing.
Suffice it to say, I felt like the BIGGEST, STUPIDEST idiot EVER when I read the next chapter. I still do. The pain never truly went away sdklsd;madl;dfkj
Well, letâs start on the chapter itself, shall we?
With the chapter summary:
The Phantomâs crazy way of thinking turns the situation into a bit of a soap opera. How does he really feel about Simon Blackquill, as far as feeling goes with him?
Stupid, stupid me, leaning into a microphone: um. Do you even have to ask. This chapter summary alone was one of my favourite things in the world⌠before reading on.
âMy actions were Bobby Fulbrightâs actions, not a reflection of my own desires.â
Okay so. I had not actually remembered this line until this second readthrough, and I absolutely have to call bull on this. We know that prior to the phantom stealing Bobbyâs life, Bobby never acted on his sexuality. FURTHERMORE, EVEN IF HE HAD, Iâm calling bull once AGAIN and am gonna say that the real Bobby Fulbright would never have abused his role as parole officer to cross a line that should not have been crossed WITH A PRISONER THAT HE IS PERSONALLY RESPONSIBLE FOR. Unavoidable power balance. The Bobby I know would not, end of story. Even if the real Bobby was attracted to Simon. He wouldnât have acted on it if he was Simonâs parole officer. AND THIS ENTIRE SPIEL IS MOOT ANYWAY BECAUSE THE PHANTOM WOULD HAVE NO WAY TO TELL WHO BOBBY WOULD BE ATTRACTED TO AND I SOMEHOW DOUBT HE GETS THAT INVESTED IN HIS ROLES TO FOLLOW THROUGH TO THIS EXTENT. I guess what it comes down to is how he later basically says âseeking acknowledgement is one thing, seeking a relationship is entirely anotherâ. So part of the driving force was the seeking acknowledgementâŚ? BUT IN A WEIRD NON-PHANTOMQUILL WAYâŚ? And thereâs also the fact that the identity of âBobby Fulbrightâ and the nameless spy known as the phantom were blurring together. But IF the identity blurring actually played a role, that would make it phantomquill, so I kind of doubt thatâs part of the explanation.
And like, sure, I get it. Pretty sure âBobby Fulbrightâ behaved that way immediately after Simon mentioned âthe phantomâ to him. So his goal was to manipulate Simon, a little bit of that âseeking acknowledgementâ in there too (BUT NOT ACTUAL PHANTOMQUILL-STYLE âSEEKING ACKNOWLEDGEMENTâ APPARENTLY????) and who knows. Maybe he was searching for the damn profile. Maybe he thought it might be hidden in Simonâs clothes. WHO KNOWS. But like, I get it, it was ânot a reflection of his own desiresâ, APPARENTLY.
fffffffffffffff
âI am what one might call aromantic and asexual,â
So as a quick aside, worth noting that on the first readthrough⌠Like⌠I knew the kiss was still coming so at the start when heâs saying this stuff, it felt more like him denying it, only for ya know⌠the kiss to happen and all. It was only after it fully played out that I came back to this line all like âOh my god⌠he was right⌠he wasnât kiddingâŚâ BUT WEâLL GET TO THERE. WITH THAT OUT OF THE WAY THOUGH-
My goodness. Reading this sent me into another realm. It just like? Astral projected me to some other planet because heLLOOOO I WOULD LIKE TO DISSECT THIS A LITTLE BIT:
Firstly, the word âasexualâ? Okay, thatâs commonly used outside of the context of people being ace. So it would not be too surprising for him to say something about being asexual because, thatâs already a commonly-used English word, even if that âcommon definitionâ (see: plants and whatever) is not the definition he is using here, he could easily use this word in this context without knowing that plenty of people actually do use it in this context as a label for themselves.
BUT âAROMANTICâ ⌠NOW THATâS INTERESTING. âAromanticâ is a very specific word with a specific definition! It is not a commonly-known English word in day-to-day life among the average person and it is not used outside of people using it as a label to identify themselves with!
ALL OF THIS TO SAY⌠FOR HIM TO USE BOTH WORDS? IMPLIES HE KNOWS HIS STUFF.
IF the phantom had been randomly pulling out the word âasexualâ because it would be âobvious what it means in this contextâ without knowing that asexuality is A Fairly Common Thing, he would have just called himself asexual and nothing else. Because for people who arenât particularly knowledgeable on the subject, they often conflate asexuality and aromanticism together!
With that being said, there is still the possibility that he isnât aware of the communities that have been formed around those labels. That he was doing a simple equation here and putting âa-â in front of âsexualityâ and âromanticâ to demonstrate that heâs ânoneâ in both.
BUT IâM STILL INCLINED TO SAY THAT THE FACT THAT HE SPECIFICALLY SAYS âAROMANTICâ MEANS HEâS KINDA KNOWLEDGEABLE ABT ITâŚ
And I just CANNOT get over this and the implications attached to it. The phantom knows about asexuality and aromanticism and self-identifies as aroace? THE PHANTOM KNOWS ABOUT THE SPLIT ATTRACTION MODEL? DSDFKLMLKDF;LDSL;-
Ohhh my god.
And yes, in this year 2019 these terms and communities are becoming more and more widespread, but theyâre still not particularly mainstream. I know also that this fic is set in 2028, but⌠Iâm more primed to think about when this fic was written â a few years back â when these terms and communities would have been a little bit more obscure. Thatâs the primary background I think of RE: the phantom actually knowing this stuff.
Also, hah, itâs so many layers because WOW⌠Talk about absolutely awful aroace representation in a sense right here. You get this character in your canon calling themselves aroace and theyâre⌠the despicable, emotionless murderer & VILLAIN. Feels like it falls directly into the âbad representationâ trap, HOWEVER. I do feel that the situation is much more nuanced in this case.
Like yeah, he might be an emotionless murderer, and on the surface that looks bad, BUT! Heâs also a major protagonist that we have come to sympathise with at times and feel bad for⌠The story has followed and focused on him so much. It has shown him in so many different lights, somehow managing to make him such an extremely well-rounded character with depth. Therefore, at least to me⌠It doesnât necessarily feel like bad representation at all. Heâs not limited to being the bad guy. Heâs so much more than that. This is nothing but another aspect to his character. And being aroace is not necessarily directly linked to his villainy. So much about him has been broken down and deconstructed. So somehow⌠by some miracle⌠In the context of this fic, the fact that the emotionless murderer is aroace could almost circle back around into being almost good representation, amazingly enough. Or⌠well, thatâs the thing. Whether itâs âgoodâ or âbadâ representation most likely ultimately isnât your primary concern anyway. Neither is ârepresentationâ, for that matter. What matters is a good story with good characters that make sense. So there may be no point talking about the representation angle anyway: itâs not necessarily ârepresentationâ. Itâs just a character with a certain identity that happens to neutrally exist in the plot, whoever that character may be and whatever that character may happen to be.
And I also have happened to see you mention that you yourself are ace!
But Iâm merely analysing the text as I would with any piece of fiction â and will continue to do so. Being aware that youâre ace yourself gives me a little bit more perspective on things, but I wouldnât have necessarily been aware of that in different circumstances and therefore wish to look at the text as its own entity and how it comes across to me as the reader.
As for the rest of what he saysâŚ
Ohhh geez. Now itâs time to talk about something else. Another little fatal mistake I made in my approach to reading this series. We must once again return ourselves to when I read Chasing Phantoms.
Now I myself am asexual, of the repulsed kind⌠xD
So when I came across That phantomquill scene in Chasing Phantoms, my response was basically just, âoh GEEZ that is NOT a mental image I want thankyouverymuch nope nope nope nope.â And just â kept reading on and did my best to forget about that scene. Juuust bury it away and not think about it. :P Ignore it! Pretend it didnât happen. And this alone created some âdistanceâ between myself and the narrative at the time, that my instinct already was to reject something connected back to that version of the phantom.
Looks like I did a little too good of a job forgetting about it. And with it out of mind, well, Iâd become sooo heavily entrenched in the series by this point and really was clinging to everything that was canon.
I read this chapter and it was just like⌠oh dear. Oh DEAR. That was a thing. That happened in this series!!!
It was just SHOVED in my face undeniably in this chapter, as if I could not have possibly received a nastier slap in the face with the reminder of that incidentâs existence. xDDDD
My distance when reading Chasing Phantoms had just come back to bite me in the biggest way⌠Iâd gotten so heavily attached to the canon of this series by this point. But Iâd conveniently forgotten the canon that I didnât want to acknowledge, and hadnât fully acknowledged back then. Suddenly! I was well and truly being forced to acknowledge EVERYTHING! Ahaha.
The spy pushed away from the sink to take a few steps towards Simon. The look on his face was harder than itâd ever been before. The closest thing to fierce determination the man could muster, perhaps.
THIS must be when he gets the STUPID idea to, I DONâT KNOW, SHIPBAIT ME INTO OBLIVION? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
There was nothing heartfelt or affectionate about it.
NOTHING????? NOTHING?????????
âAwwwâŚÂ Busted.â The Phantom ran a hand past his mouth, but he was still grinning. It was a grin that Simon remembered from those first visits to solitary confinement. A grin thatâd been coupled with purposeful jabs below the belt. âIsnât that a damn shame?â
In spite of everythingâŚâŚâŚâŚ. I love this line. I just love the âaw bustedâ itâs sdjdfnkljdlnk I LOVE IT. HE IS THE WORRRRRRRST.
âDonât be like that. I was only attempting to relive that pleasant night we had last year before itâs too late.â
Me: OH MY GOD SOMEONE SHUT HIM UP SOMEONE SHUT HIM UP RIGHT NOW I DO NOT WANT TO HEAR ANY OF THIS SHUT IT DOWN.
Phantom: [opens mouth to speak]
Me:
Oh I canât. I cannot.
Me: âI am BEGGING you to shut up. For once in your miserable life, in your whole pathetic existence⌠SHUT UP.â
This narrative had given me so much Suffering & Sympathetic Phantom and a whole manner of like⌠âNiceâ Phantom and this is justâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚ W O W. The narrative primed me so much on things like Sympathetic Phantom and âhahahaaaa heâs a child just look at him!â and this is just like! A harsh, merciless jolt! -OH ONE LIKE HEâS ABOUT TO RECEIVE ACTUALLY, WASNâT THINKING OF THAT WHEN I TYPED THAT BUT HAHAAâŚ
BUT HIM SAYING THESE THINGS HAD SUCH ENTERTAINING SHOCK VALUE TOO. THE FLIPPANCY!
The Phantom stirred and pushed himself into a sitting position. He was still trembling, though at the very least that detestable grin had been washed off his face. âYouâre welcome.â
Goooo to hell. Go to hell.
He briefly considered retrieving his feather from the ground as well, then thought better of himself. Five second rule aside, the fact that it was lying on the bathroom floor of a hospital instantly rendered it trash for the janitors to do away with.
SDKJBSDKJB SIMON.
âUnderstood.â The Phantom pushed himself to his feet, though he seemed to be having some trouble keeping his balance. Perhaps the electric currents had left a stronger impact on his body than was evident. To think this incident took place right before a jarring surgeryâŚ
HE IS SUCH A MORON. YOU IDIOT.
Perhaps this would be their final conversation, Simon realized with a sudden jolt. âŚNo, the surgery would be harmless. It was an easy procedure. That was what the doctor had claimed.
This I had a small bit of trouble with, because something like brain surgery hardly seems like an âeasyâ and âharmlessâ procedure, but the dangers were actually touched on as I pointed out in my previous post⌠I just guess I would have emphasised the dangers a little more. But perhaps you did research and were able to determine that such a hypothetical procedure⌠would be âharmlessââŚ?
The Phantom closed his eyes for a few seconds and Simon could see the corners of his mouth twitch. âI am⌠glad that we got to be partners one last time. Trust or no trust, I think that we make a favorable team.â
Look my soul had already well and truly left my body by this point of the chapter so I did not remember this line at all. I donât really know what the hellâs it âsposed to mean or whatâs going on. I guess it doesnât matter. I have already been DESTROYED.
Dear Phantom,
Yours Sincerely,
-One of your biggest fans.
Sooo I was devastated. And felt deeply humiliated. And then that devastation turned to pure desperation. Even if things turned out this way⌠There had to still be hidden actual one-sided phantomquill nonetheless, right? I needed this. I needed this so badly, Iâd staked everything on one-sided phantomquillâs reality here, something I had never truly done in any other phantom fic Iâd ever read â fics that would willingly offer up phantomquill to me on a silver platter.
But every last bit of âphantomquillâ that Iâd been assuming and hadnât even cared for prior to this point turned out not to be phantomquill at allâŚ? It faded away, just when I needed it most. At which point, a second wave of devastation hit me. At the fact that not only had the chapter gone horribly, horribly awry from what my fantasies had played out in my mind, but that there had apparently never been any one-sided phantomquill. Heightening my sense of my own idiocy tenfold.
And this second wave was exacerbated by another realisation: Even if there were traces of genuine phantomquill to be found in other parts of the series, it hardly made any difference in the end. My feelings were hurt by chapter 19. Everything had been banked on that. And nothing could change how it actually played out.
And I thought it over countless times, because I usually like to pride myself on understanding and siding with authorial intent, you know? Or at least striving to most of the time. Was I truly just unbelievably stupid? What was I supposed to expect from the chapter? What about the other âphantomquillâ scenes and implications that took place, dotted all throughout the series, that can be viewed through different lenses? It was clear that some baiting had been at play, but how much of it had been intentional and how much was me just an idiot reading the text incorrectly? (The fact that you were gunning for it in the beginning makes it seem like such a deep-rooted, ridiculously long-running con-job⌠my goodness⌠Even if it wasnât intended to be a con from the start⌠That means the audience⌠Can you really say the audience is not being conned way back in Chasing Phantoms? How else were they supposed to interpret the phantomâs characterisation back thenâŚ?! How were they supposed to knowâŚ! And if actual phantomquill had been what you intended at the time of writing itâŚ!) Oh I was ruined and driven into doubting myself so much and KICKING myself over this.
There was⌠No justice in any of this, it seemed. And I could not even feel ârighteousâ in any way. I just felt pathetic.
Because Iâd only been asking for something one-sided⌠Iâd wanted to see my favourite character suffer even more. Itâs not the ânormalâ âI just want character to be happyâ type angle. So it felt like such a weird thing to beg for. But beeeeeg for it I did anyway, huh.
I just! Wanted! To see some more Vulnerable Phantom! Maybe with just a little bit of genuine emotions leaking through! What would have made it so wonderful⌠Is that it takes place JUST before the surgery! Therefore it would demonstrate that even with his severely limited emotional state! He stillâŚ! THATâS WHAT I WANTED OK IS THAT SO WRONG?!
No it isnât and meet me out back Iâve got sources come prepared Iâll present my ten page essay on why you wrote your own fic wrong and sjsdjsdkj
^Me, in all-out confrontation & idiot mode, arguing at you over this, well and truly willing to go down with this one-sided ship
And when some of the devastation subsided, I went into Bitter Mode. Ohhhhhhh the saltiness. Ohhhhhhh I got salty, veeeeery salty. STILL not entirely sure if Iâm done being salty. Or will ever be done being salty & bitter over this, played up intentionally to my friend to reap all of its comedic potential. :P Iâd been burrrrrrrrrned.
So there you have it. Since you like irony so damn muchâŚ
I took the âphantomquillâ in this series for granted at first. âPhantomquillâ that I later practically begged for.
I didnât care a whole lot for the initial scene where the phantom lets himself fall from that window in Chasing Phantoms (of course, I later realised how good it was on its own). A scene that was directly tied to and paralleled one of the extreme heights of my enjoyment in Vanquishing Mirages, also helping me to gain a far deeper appreciation of said earlier scene.
And the one time where I got super invested in phantomquill and wanted it, really wanted it, was with one of the very few fics that would flatly refuse to provide it.
Oh wait, one more thing too. The aro ace thing. Lol if he was agender too in this, heâd be triple-A hahaha
That was another thing when I came across the phantomquill in Chasing Phantoms initially. I was just like, âmmmm, no, nah. If anything, going by the âcanonâ of the game, if you absolutely had to put a label on the phantom, heâd be aro ace.â
Well. Turns outâŚ
And, under just about any other circumstance, it would make me pleased to see the phantom call himself aro ace, and yet⌠The circumstances couldnât be more⌠:T
So when it finally sunk in that, yea he is?
I was just likeâŚ
âNo⌠no no no no no no⌠This is not happening⌠This cannot be happeningâŚ! MY OWN LOGIC IS BEING USED AGAINST MEEEEEEâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâŚâ
: (
But yes. The ironies that can be listed of this situation do go on and on.
That was it. The last Simon saw or heard of the entity known as the Phantom.
Me, who in spite of everything, actually does still love the phantom very much and does not want to see him now promptly vanish from this really well-written series in his really well-written form, and has noooo idea how this is gonna go and what the result of this surgery is gonna be and is therefore very nervous about how âthe phantomâ will transform after this point:
If the doctors were successful, an intangible spirit would take the form of a true human, rather like a phoenix being reborn from its own ashes.
âIâve literally just been brutally left in the dust I am hardly in any state to appreciate the beauty of sentences like this one. GO AHEAD, SHOW ME YOUR PRETTY PROSE, BUT ITâS A LITTLE LATE NOW ISNâT IT. IT WONâT WORRRRRRK IâM TOO BUSY HAVING BEEN SO THOROUGHLY OWNED BY A BAIT AND SWITCH THAT IâM LYING ON THE GROUND IN TINY PIECESâ
To prove once and for all whether or not there was a true identity hidden inside him.
Thatâs nice but I literally just could not bring myself to care anymore. I was done. The fic ended in the last chapter. It was finished. âMy versionâs canon to me now.â Thatâs one way I could try to cope and pretend my heart & dignity can remain intact. Whatever is going on now itâs just an interesting au. My little self-indulgent version is what obviously happened.
This fic could do whatever the hell it wanted because nothing about it mattered anymore, I didnât care, itâd lost me. I pettily decided at the time that Anything after Chapter 18 is the Wrong Timeline so Itâs all meaningless as far as I was concerned!
Fulbright⌠Was he truly so angry that he would miss the moment of the Phantomâs awakening?
Itâs kinda funny because in a sense, I was Bobby at this point of the chapter. Absent : ) Yeah, ok, I was reading on through my pain⌠But I was very. Emotionally absent, disconnected, or whatever youâd like to call it. In Chasing Phantoms I wasnât particularly invested because of all the doubts Iâd had. And here, my investment in however the series would continue dropped DRAMATICALLY because Iâd been too invested in it. It was just like⌠âOk. Might as well see whatever the hell happens. But nothing in this series can ever truly make me happy again as it did before. The lineâs been crossed. Sayonara.â
âŚYeah, rather bold words to utter just prior to Lifting Spirits.
But you baked the most perfect, beautiful and tantalising-looking phantomquill cake to me⌠and then you just⌠IMMEDIATELY destroyed it. You took a hammer to that cake. Threw it in the bin, leaving me desperately, brokenly reaching for the icing still smeared messily on the table, and when I did, YOU SLAPPED MY HAND AWAY. No siree I could not even have some of that icing. Ya blew it. I was done. UNFORGIVABLE. Line crossed. Your rights to the work were forfeit as far as I was concerned. It was all mine now.
Was he consulting with his trusted therapist, perhaps?
HOHOOH what if he did though. I canât remember if that gets confirmed either way. PFFF WELL YOU CAN ADD THIS MESS TO THE LIST OF THINGS BENNY MIGHT KNOW ABOUT THEN???? HOW⌠INTERESTING!
Ok but also:
I SWEAR TO GOOOOOOOD THIS LINE ACTUALLY MADE ME SO? CONFUSED AND BORDERLINE, IF NOT OUTRIGHT SUSPICIOUS ON FIRST READ BECAUSE LIKE.
Okay, there was another much more direct Benny reference earlier this same fic. Heâs actually NAMEDROPPED. I didnât point it out at the time because I didnât want to be too tedious about it and waited until the next reference like this, which I figured there would be, so that I could comment on MY THOUGHTS.
So waaay back earlier in the fic, when Benny actually gets namedropped for the first time:
What sort of advice would his therapist offer? He wished he could call the man and explain his situation, because Benny always had just the right answer to any problem.
Me at the time: wow, even the offscreen therapist gets a name? What a series! Is this series fleshed out or what?!
But even back then.
Thereâd just been. Such a handful of references to this guy.
Like, when the therapist first started being referenced it was all like âoh Iâm so glad Bobbyâs getting the counselling and help that he needsâ.
And then he just
Kept being referenced after that
And with each iteration I just got a tiny bit more and more like
âO-okayâŚ? We know Bobby is getting help⌠We are aware of it. And thatâs great. Iâm really glad. Not sure why the therapist matters though⌠weird focus on the therapist since itâs Bobbyâs recovery that is paramount here, not the therapist helping him. Just not relevant.â
Like I was deeply impressed that such an unimportant character got named, yet at the same time it was like. Aaaaalright. Heâs really not warranting this much focus. But okay then.
And now itâs Blackquill bringing him up, not Bobby. And SURE I guess the mention KINDA makes sense from him but the focus felt so fishy to me⌠âTRUSTED therapistâ⌠why the emphasis on how great this guy supposedly is. Câmooon. It REALLY made me go HMMMM. I was just like⌠who cares though. Thereâs literally no reason to bring the therapist up heâs not connected to any of this or the plot at ALLL⌠He serves ONE purpose and that is to be the unseen background force helping Bobby to work through his issues. Thatâs it!
Vanquishing Mirages, Chapter 20
Oh⌠This chapter⌠is so good. Wow⌠Wow. Not much else I can say rn.
Heâd never appreciated her. Now it was too late.
Simon saw no need to keep the truth from him. This plan had been the Phantomâs, not his own. Heâd merely been roped into it as an unwilling accomplice, yet he refused to cover the spyâs tracks.
Ffffffffffffff
Yeah I was gonna go off about âidiot spyâ again at this point but Iâve tired myself out from all the salt Iâve overloaded into this post so that my past pain can serve at least some kind of fun⌠But god. God. The phantomâs plan was PAPER thin just, ridiculously flimsy, yeah sure he came up with it on the fly whatever I guess but it like. Depends on Blackquill playing along and ffffffffffffff. Alright I guess maybe he figured Simon would play along if Simon was interested in shielding Bobby from grief as the phantom explained was his intent but god. Ghhhhhh. It just feels like insult to injury too cause he has this Grand Plan to protect Bobby which immediately proceeds to fail.
And it was enough to fuel his loathing further. He shook his head so violently that it made him dizzy, yet he managed to stop himself from raising his voice again. Shouting wouldnât make his point any clearer. Instead, he stepped forward and crouched down before Fulbrightâs chair. He grabbed the manâs nearest hand with both of his own. He was lousy with words and he knew that much, but he needed to at least try to communicate his thoughts- his feelings- before this misunderstanding was allowed to spread any more. âDo you truly not remember what Iâve told you from the day I first met you?â he demanded, his tone of voice more fierce than heâd intended but lacking in volume nonetheless. âYou are nothing like the man who played the part of my chaperone. I would sooner take my own life than return to those days. You, on the other hand, give me another reason to live. I can tell the difference between the two of you and that makes all the difference in the world.â
[âŚ]
âI love you, Bobby Fulbright, not the fallacy that pretended to be you. However, if you dare to call my feelings into question again, I will not hesitate to tear you to shreds myself.â
This is a Crowning Moment of Heartwarming for Blackbright right here. This is SOO good. I really admired and appreciated this shining Blackbright moment even amidst the whirl of everything else I was busy reacting to.
And⌠On that uplifting note, Iâll finish this otherwise ridiculously salty mess of a post. XD Iâll tackle the rest of this chapter & more beyond next time. This is already waaaaay too long anyway. But I knew that this post would inevitably be a massive one, and I had to essentially say Stuff You to the very notion of any self-imposed word-limits.
#riskiest post yet?#I've been kinda dreading this#AND Y E T#Oh I forgot to add 'long post' to help avoid clogging peoples dashboards if the readmore fails so:#long post
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@hideriame replied to your post âI was thinking about the first ânovelâ I managed to finish, back when...â
Where they your typical edgy YA teens? đ Itâs cool though
Actually, not entirely. đ
To be perfectly honest, Iâve always despised the âedgy teenâ trope, so thatâs something I wasnât completely guilty of.
On the other hand, under the attempt of âgiving my main character flawsâ, I did accidentally turn the female lead into a milder version of an âedgy YA teenâ. đ
But, it was always treated as a negative aspect she had to overcome. Being an orphan who had always had to fend for herself, she was, in the beginning, distrustful and also kind of selfish. She couldnât truly bring herself to do what she thought was right if she was afraid it might have bad consequences for her. She also had a good heart, however, so she got over the âselfishâ part pretty quickly. Not being used to people caring for her, she was also out of her depths with that aspect (it took her a bit to accept that the concern was genuine â once again, also out of fear of being hurt if she accepted that concern and it turned out to be fake) and sometimes hid her uneasiness behind a bit of snark. She was kind of a mild case, though. She was always respectful to adults (because she wasnât stupid and she knew perfectly well who was in a position of power), the snarky part only came out with her peers. Once again, I always presented it as a negative aspect. She got called out on it by anybody who noticed (not everybody because, as Iâve said above, she was much more polite and meek around adults), and eventually mellowed out and apologized to those she had treated wrongly.
The male lead, instead, was like the polar opposite of an âedgy YA teenâ. He was kind-hearted and idealistic, ready to fight and sacrifice himself for what he thought was right. He has also grown up very sheltered and with little contact with other people, though, so he was definitely too idealistic. He had a bit of trouble seeing the shades of grey and grasping the complexity of some situations. He couldnât conciliate his high ideals with the compromises real life forces people to. The only thing he had in common with an âedgy YA teenâ was that he was impulsive and reckless, but he was actually closer to a cinnamon roll, haha.
I actually think that this is another thing that wasnât too bad? The two main characters balanced each other quite well. He helped her shed her pessimistic views and pushed her to act, while she grounded him and made him reflect more.
What was the villain like? Thatâs my main concern in fiction, (Iâm always drawn to them)Â
Well, keep in mind that this was written by a 13/14-year-old, so it wasnât anything groundbreaking. Iâm just surprised I gave my villain(s) a bit more depth than âshe did it because she was Evil and called herself the Queen of Darknessâ. đ
(Actually, the symbol of the organization was a scale because they wanted to âbring balanceâ.)
In a very quick summary, the setting was that humanity had had to move to a different planet (but that was forgotten, and the technology had receded after a big war) that was already inhabited by many magical creatures (this is so cringe-y omg) who didnât mingle with humans but tried to hide themselves. Some humans had also started developing magical powers (telepathy and telekinesis), that got stronger and more widespread generation after generation.
The main villain belonged to a generation were few people displayed powers yet, and hers were unnaturally strong. Being born into a rich family that valued appearances above everything else, she was treated as a freak by everybody but her twin brother, whom she was very close to. She was relegated to her room and her parents pretended she was gravely ill and unstable. She resented them a lot and at first acted bratty and creepy on purpose, but the more she grew up, the more she realized that the most effective way to get was she wanted was to lay low and manipulate people. She also became more and more aware of all the falsities and conflicts people basked in. Being able to read their minds, she saw how the relationships her parents had with other members of the high society were based on envy and lies. After growing up, her brother started building a political career. Making use of her powers, she helped him as much as she could. Even with her limited mobility, she managed to do a lot. Her brother would bring people at home, and she wouldnât interact with them but stir their emotions in the right way and tell his brother what they thought. But, the political climate was very shaky (it wasnât long after the war I have previously mentioned). Her brother died (as collateral damage, he wasnât the main target) during a protest organized by dissidents that went overboard. That was when she realized that people with her powers couldnât just watch from the sidelines â they had to be directly involved. She changed the memories of the people involved and from that moment on, she pretended to be her brother and quickly climbed to higher ranks. At the same time, she started looking for other people with abilities similar to her ones (even if they were all weaker) and gathered them around her. They all shared similar stories of being shunned and abused. The more she discovered, the more she became convinced that the optimal system would be people with mental powers ruling over everybody else, trading any form of freedom for peace. She also researched a lot on magic and magical creatures in general. Most of them were animal-like, but there was also one kind that was genetically and phenotypically very close to humans â interbreeding was even possible. In spite of being the original inhabitants of the planet, they werenât many and they hadnât mixed well with humans. There was a lot of distrust on both sides. My villain wanted to use them at first, but she quickly realized how more powerful their magic was. They were very likely to overthrow humans â so, for the sake of humankind, they had to be eliminated until just a few remained and were forced to cooperate with her. During her research, she also came across a weakness all magic beings shared â some magical stones that could absorb their magic. After a bit of experimenting, she managed to find a way to transfer that magic to humans, and she filled herself to the brink until she was barely a shade of a human (she also gained some sort of eternal youth and immortality). Over the years, she and her followers infiltrated the government and, thanks to their powers, strengthened it to a dictatorship.
The thing about her is that she truly was convinced that she was doing everything for the good of humanity. Not only she was very good at manipulating people, playing on the weaknesses and fears to bring them to her side, but she was also genuinely convinced that what she was doing was right. She was even kind to people, as long as they didnât interfere with her plans. She genuinely wanted them to be happy. For example, the male lead? He was the son of one of her helpers (one with the strongest powers). But, his mother was also kind of unstable (due to her past and growing up among violence) and not really suited for being a mother. So, the main villain decided to put him under the care of another person she trusted, far from any violence, because she thought that was the best way to raise a child. This went wrong (for her) because the man who raised the male lead was actually a double agent and certainly didnât raise the boy to believe in the government, but the point still is that she wanted him to have something close to a regular childhood. Besides, she always tried to bring people to her side before hurting them. Of course, refusal wasnât allowed and any form of dissidence would be annihilated to preserve the status quo (without much remorse), but this was the last resort.
As you can see, my intention was to create a complex villain. Thereâs still a lot to work on (and a few paragraphs arenât the same as reading this in a book and inside the context, anyway) and itâs nothing special, but I donât think it was completely horrible, either.
#writing#musings on old writing#characterization#villains#hideriame#feyna answers#thanks for stopping by!
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I was tagged by @cloudedsunshinesâ thank u Bree ily
Favorite snack?
idk if I have like a FAVORITE but I eat popcorn the most lol and I put white cheddar seasoning on it mmm itâs so good
Favorite place to go on vacation?
oh god uh I haven't been on vacation in a while adfhsjhgk and I've only gone to a few places but my favorites are Hawaii (Oahu especially) and San Francisco (cuz theyâre all abt gay pride baby)
Tea or coffee?
I don't drink either lmao I've only really found one of each that I like so
And what kind?
okay so for tea thereâs this flowering tea that I've only ever seen irl at this one lil coffee shop but I believe it was jasmine green tea or smth similar (itâs been a couple yrs idr) and it was amazing. and for coffee the only one I like is the mcdonalds chocolate mocha frappe bc itâs more chocolate than coffee afsfklsfjhg
What is a song that makes you dance immediately?
Donât Threaten Me With a Good Time by P!atD and OKAY I know this is lame and white af but also cha cha slide >
Do you play an instrument?
NOPE. I tried to learn guitar and piano but I donât have the dexterity or the memory to pick up notes and chords
What is your favorite personality type?
what does this even mean
Favorite comedian?
John Mulaney and Iliza Schlesinger (I saw her in person and she was so good omg)
Gummy candy or chocolate?
chocolate all the way
What did you want to be when you grew up as a kid?
p sure I wanted to be a teacher bc both of my parents are teachers but that shitâs HARD yo
Whatâs your favorite physical feature of yourself?
uhhh do freckles count? bc I have freckles all over my face and shoulders/arms and I just love freckles idk
When was the last time you watched a show or a movie on a TV?
I donât have any kind of cable but I just watched glee tonight lmao but the last thing I watched live (Hulu live is gr8) was the shadowhunters finale
Unpopular opinion
????? I canât think of any off the top of my head??? altho I agree with Bree
âbernie is awesome but hes old as fuck and we need to acknowledge the fact he very well could die in office and not get much doneâÂ
I been thinking the same shit since the last election that man is OLD im sorry
Are you scared of bugs?
hell yea I am, the only ones I'm chill with are ladybugs and roly polies (however the fuck u spell it lmfao) otherwise I'm gonna scream and run
FUN FACT I'm deathly afraid of spiders bc when I was a kid I had a dream that a giant orange spider was in my garage and it ate my mom and I cried for like an hr after I woke up
Cats or dogs?
I like both and have owned both but I prefer dogs thatâs why I have 5 adkjfhskhg
Are you allergic to any foods?
uhhhh not that I'm aware of
Does the description of your star sign match your personality?
hell no. Leos are always described as outgoing (as if), confident and brave(HAHAHAHAHAH), wanting to be the center of attention (oh god no),  just generally like most-popular-kid-in-school kinda traits and yeah that ainât me. the only thing close to me that I saw is stubborn which yeahh I can be lmao. I swear I was supposed to be a libra (I think) bc I was born early like libra or virgo fit me so much better
Name the first song that comes into your head?
Pussy is God by King Princess cause I guess im in a lonely lesbian mood adshfgalk
Cake or pie?
cake. altho certain kinds can be too sweet but I like more cakes than pies
When was the last time you read an entire book?
I finished Johnny Got His Gun by Dalton Trumbo a few weeks ago
Favorite junk food?
chicken nuggets
Do you like your height?
nope I'm 5â˛0 MAYBE 5â˛1 im short as fuck
Apples or oranges?
I don't like either one sjdfajhg I like apple juice tho not orange juice if that counts
Whatâs your favorite personality trait in a person?
compassion is always good
Do you like salad?
nah I have texture issues w certain foods and lettuce makes me wanna throw up tbh
Which person inspires you the most?
I just answered this in another recent ask meme I think so I'm just gonna say the people not the reasons lol. my hs journalism teacher and also Anne frank
What is a song that has made you cry?
funny enough I was watching glee and they sang Pure Imagination from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory and it made me tear up
I tag anybody who wants to do it and also @sapphic-maidenâ
#tagged#I should actually start tagging some of my shit like this so I can go back and look at it later lmaoo
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All Night
Read here on AO3. words: 931 fandom: Boku no Hero Academia characters/ pairings: Izuku/All Might, Izuku/Bakugo, Class 1-A & Izuku (about half of 1-A is present) tags: chatlog, texting, dialogue-only, mild crack, teasing notes: Iâve never written a chatlog type fic before, but I woke up and suddenly it was there. Izuku just wanted to talk about the homework. xXx Deku: Did either of you finish the homework we got from All Night? Deku: It was kind of hard. ~No Gravity~: Pfft Deku-kun, was that a Freudian slip? Deku: what? Deku: omg uraraka-san no IngeniumX: Uraraka-san, you know Freud's theories have been disproven, right? Deku: it was ust a typo
IngeniumX: Although that doesn't necessarily diminish the implication. ~No Gravity~: hee! Deku: it was Autocorrect! ~No Gravity~: aww it's okay Deku-kun ~No Gravity~: i mean it's All Right. for you to like All Might Deku: uraraka-san please xBakusatsujinx: hahaha IngeniumX: Midoriya-kun, Uraraka-san is just teasing you. Deku: what? why is Kacchan here? IngeniumX: But I'm positive your friends and classmates will be fully supportive of you if that is the case. ~No Gravity~: Oh I added him when I made the group. xBakusatsujinx: Ochaco you hit the nail on the head with this one. Nerd's been obsessed since forever. ~No Gravity~: awww Deku: Kacchan come on xBakusatsujinx: when we were kids sometimes he wanted us to play pretend ~No Gravity~: so cute Deku: omg Kacchan dont xBakusatsujinx: and I'd be All Might xBakusatsujinx: ... xBakusatsujinx: yknow actually i'll just let you imagine the rest ~No Gravity~: aww Densetsu Denki: hey don't leave us hanging _Earphone_Jakku_: You can't do that, Bakugo. Finish your story. Yaoyorozu Momo: The two of you must have gotten along better back then. Alien+Queen: you kissed, didn't you? =3 Deku: how many people did you add to this chat??! Rockman: did you play house and have a bunch of kids GrapesOfWrath: that is Disgusting! Ashido I can't believe you made me imagine that with my own brain ~No Gravity~: most of 1-A. ^^; Sorry! Froppy: Mineta-chan, quit it. _Earphone_Jakku_: /You're/ disgusting, Mineta. Deku: [this kills the man.png] xBakusatsujinx: he's definitely got a thing for All Might though ~No Gravity~: i'm sorry, Deku-kun! ^^; _Earphone_Jakku_: Yeah but who /doesn't/ though? Rockman: bakugo are you just trying to get us to stop thinking about you kissing midoriya? GrapesOfWrath: I DON'T ~No Gravity~: I never meant for this to turn into an... All Fight ~No Gravity~: XD; Yaoyorozu Momo: Nobody ask your opinion, Mineta. Alien+Queen: oh my gosh Ochaco yes GrapesOfWrath: JIRO SAID WHO DOESN'T HAVE A CRUSH ON ALL MIGHT AND I SAID I DONT Densetsu Denki: woah Jiro-chan do you have a crush on all might too? ~No Gravity~: hehe but its quite the All Sight, isn't it? Rockman: capslock abuse, ban him Alien+Queen: it's definitely an impressive chat log! Good thing we're All Tight, or this might turn into no bark and All Bite. =P _Earphone_Jakku_: I mean it's not like a crush really. It's just, he's the world's greatest hero. ~No Gravity~: Ashido, nice! _Earphone_Jakku_: It's not like it's weird if Midoriya does like him. Kinda makes sense. Alien+Queen: thanks! =D I love a good pun. Densetsu Denki: yeah I get that _Earphone_Jakku_: He's a celebrity. Deku: I just wanted to know if anyone finished the homework. T_T GrapesOfWrath: you guys are crazy! Why would anybody like all might? If he was a girl maybe. Froppy: Midoriya-chan's not dead after all. :] Densetsu Denki: you don't have to be shy about it, Midoriya. Alien+Queen: /I'd/ like All Might if he was a girl. wow can you imagine? Rockman: haha mineta but his tits are already bigger than most of the girls in class Densetsu Denki: it's okay if you like All Might, jiro said so. Rockman: maybe you need to change your priorities. GrapesOfWrath: man tits are not the same as girl tits! AT ALL. youre heathens! _Earphone_Jakku_: Yeah, sure. I'll back you up, Midoriya. ~No Gravity~: aww see deku-kun, people don't mind <3 Froppy: Midoriya-chan, I'm on your side. IngeniumX: You should all stop teasing Midoriya-kun. After all, you can't help how you feel sometimes. GrapesOfWrath: I'm leaving, you guys are gross. _Earphone_Jakku_: I'm not teasing. Yaoyorozu Momo: Yes, Iida-kun is right. Midoriya-kun, was there a particular part of the homework you had trouble with? I can PM you about it if you like. Rockman: I bet mineta's having a crisis, thinking about how big All Might's boobs are xBakusatsujinx: I can't believe you're all siding with the nerd. It's npt cute it's annoying. ~No Gravity~: lol yeah, pretty sure they're bigger than mine XD; Densetsu Denki: hey don;t be jealous just becayse Midoriya would rather kiss the hot teacher these days haha IngeniumX: Kaminari-kun, I'm not sure that's entirely appropriate to talk about. Alien+Queen: ooh boy that's an image! IngeniumX: Even if it is true. ~No Gravity~: oh my gosh XDXDXD; Froppy: wow Rockman: haha mineta would be puking right now _Earphone_Jakku_: Lol is it getting a little hot in here? Yaoyorozu Momo: Well. I have to go now. Good night! Deku: [this is fine.gif] ALL MIGHT: Shouldn't you all be heading to bed by now? Densetsu Denki: !! Alien+Queen: omg was he here the whole time?! Froppy: oops XD; Rockman: oh haha hey sensei _Earphone_Jakku_: uh yeah I've gotta go ALL MIGHT: Midoriya, if you need extra help with the homework, you can see me privately after class. ~No Gravity~: ĘâżĘ Froppy: wowow _Earphone_Jakku_: Holy shit I'm dying! Densetsu Denki: please don't let us all get detention Rockman: did he even read the rest of the convo? Did he read what he just wrote?? Alien+Queen: THIS IS THE WORST!!! <3 <3 Deku: Okay. Thanks. ^^; _Earphone_Jakku_: he's not even paying attention Alien+Queen: I CAN'T WITH THIS ALL MIGHT: (o^-')b Froppy: cute~ GrapesOfWrath: OH MY GOD I AM CALLING THE COPS ON EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU!
#elo fics#bnha#bnha fanfiction#dekumight#chatlog fic#wow I even already got a nice comment on AO3 sweet#I actually had a ridiculous amount of fun writing this#tbh i think mineta was my favorite
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A Documentation of the Fattest Planet (Part 3)
Stardate: 25121225 - 6122
Earth Relative Time: 0800
Location: Landing Site - Planet ID 6554 - Solar System Demeter - Ambrosia Galaxy
Well, a series of increasingly strange occurrences happened today. First of all corporate got back to me from Persephone and they seemed... unimpressed. It was all pretty routine of a planetary probe check-in, essentially an acknowledgment that Iâm not dead, I guess complex carbohydrates arenât as noteworthy as they used to be. I have a feeling that corporate will be more impressed by what I found today, though.
I put on the standard issue Exoplanet Exploration Suit, essentially a tight jumpsuit meant to monitor and regulate vitals. I kept the helmet down, as the atmospheric reading confirmed breathable oxygen. I guess I wasnât ready for the environment to smell so... delicious. I guess it makes sense, considering the aromas found in last nightâs chemical analysis, but it smelled like a bakery. The ground was soft, almost plush. Even though the sky was a brown haze from orbit, the sky was a bright blue on the surface. The vegetation of the planet was far more robust than I expected. Towering trees that spun sunlight to the ground, bright green leaves, and fruit of tremendous size and brilliant color.
I began to collect samplings, soil, vegetation, and the like, when a rumbling from the near distance caught my attention. I didnât have the standard issue shocking projectile gun, so I hesitated to move into the brush of the forest, but what caused the noise came to me instead. From the underbrush emerged a humanoid creature. Medium-skinned, straight but flowing red hair, maybe 5Ⲡ6âł, and a body akin to human females. Well, akin may be a light way of putting her figure. She had titantic breasts, each one larger than her head, and a butt equally large. She began to approach me, seemingly enamored or concerned, so I fumbled with my Babble, the standard issue in-ear translator, before I could converse with her. Once I could understand her alien tongue, it became apparent her concern. She was saying âMy, you poor thing, how long have you been out here?â.
âMy name is Gwenevere Rosered from Starborne Systems Intergalactic. I come to you in peace and good faith.â I told her, as is the standard greeting weâre trained to give. Before I could ask the further questions, she had embraced me in her arms and was immediately in a sense of comfort.
âMy my, youâre dangerously skinny, letâs fix that for you!â she said as she put her right nipple into my mouth. I consciously registered that this was strange, but something about her was so calming, I complied for longer than I should have. I felt my stomach expand as an endless stream of milk flowed into my body. I canât really explain the feeling she gave me, but it was so calming, so warm. Only when she switched her boobs after I drained one of them could I snap out of that haze to speak with her.
âIâm sorry, Iâm from a different planet, Iâm actually here for research, I canât drink anymore.â
âOh sugar, youâre so painfully thin though! I mean look at yourself!â
I looked down and my midsection was more bloated than before.
âI donât understand, Iâm sorry. I would like to ask you about your planet thou- *mmph*!â Before I could finish my sentence, she had taken a fistful of dirt and put it in my mouth. A wash of chocolaty goodness flooded my mouth, a flavor beyond sweetness but simultaneously caramelly and chocolaty.
âI get it, sometimes you drink too much, so you need food to balance the drink!â
I pushed her hands out of my face and took a step back.Â
âThis is all very used to me, Iâm not used to your customs. Can we please talk first? I have some questions I would love to ask you.â
She paused and looked at me contemplatively.
âWell ok, but Iâm gonna have to make you a big meal while we talk!â
I agreed, and she began to collect various elements of the surrounding environment. She pushed over the trees with relative ease, revealing a fluffy cake filling with streaks of frosting throughout, piling the fallen logs in a pile. She plucked some of the vibrant, blue, bulbous fruits from the trees each one seemingly filled with a translucent goo.
âSo what is your name? Let me start there.â To be honest, this was my first time interacting with a new species, and I honestly forgot a lot of what was taught, so I was kind of improvising everything.
âWell, my name is Carrie!â She said while on her knees, digging a hole in the chocolate soil. She quickly hit a layer of caramel, which she scooped up with her hands and drizzled over the timber she fell earlier.
âAre you alone out here?â
âOh no! I have lots of friends. Some of them are like me, some of them are like Brianna! Omg, you two should meet each other! Youâd LOVE her!â
âHow is your friend Brianna different from you?â
âOh, well sheâs really tall, and her skin is lighter than me, and her hair is short, and sheâs really really strong, like super buff!â Carrie then flexed her arms, which made almost no difference to her form. âAlso her boobies are small, not like me!â She then grabbed her breasts, which immediately sunk deep into her flesh. Her right was smaller than her left, on account of her feeding me, but it had been slowly regrowing as we spoke. She then began to milk herself, filling the hold in the ground with her milk.
âSo your breasts are large with milk, have you recently given birth?â
âHuh?â She looked puzzled. âIs birth a present you give to people? I give my friends lots of presents, but I donât know that Iâve ever given anybody a birth.â
âBirth. Like after youâre pregnant and you have a child?â
âPregnant? Child?â
âWhere do your species come from? Do you not sexually reproduce?â
âOh no, we have sex aaaallllll the time! But we just live?â
âDoes your species never die?â
âThe plants do, but we donât! Also, whatâs my species?â
It was clear to me that whatever this species is, it isnât very technologically advanced. For the next hour or so, I followed Carrie as she continued collecting pieces of the environment and explained to her who I am, where Iâm from, and even some basic things like standard biology.
As the sun began to set, Carrie lit a large bonfire in the clearing and put a large piece of meat, which she actually found in a plant, and began to cook the masses of food she had gathered.
âAlrighty miss smarty pants, you got to ask me your questions and all, so now itâs time to eat!â
She walked over to the fallen cake log that I was sitting on with a red velvet tree trunk and set it down on my lap. She then began taking handfuls of the tree and began feeding it to me.
âOh, I can eat this myself, thank you!â I insisted.
âOkie Dokie, Iâll bring more over then!â
I was waiting for her to bring some of her fallen trees over to herself, but she just kept dragging logs to me.
âArenât you going to have any?â I asked
âNo silly, this is for you! Iâm not hungry, I had cake tree leaf earlier!â
Was she crazy? It was enough food to feed the entire Persephone crew!
âSo is it the ones like Brianna that eat this much food? You donât seem to be terribly hungry.â
âOh, yea! They eat aloooooot of food, but not as much as the queens like you do!â
So despite not having developed technologies, or even clothes, apparently, they have some sort of political structure.
âOh, Iâm not a queen.â
âWell sure you are! You donât have big boobies, and you donât have big muscles, so you must be a queen! Just, a queen who hasnât had any food in a long time.â
Well, I guess who isnât wrong.
âHow can I be a queen if Iâm not from this planet, remember? I look like a normal person from my -Â â
âSpecies!â
She was learning.
âSo tell me about the queens? They eat a lot?â
âOh, yea! Every town has one queen and a lot of people who try to be queens! Then, every year, the town weighs all the people who try to be queen and whoever is the biggest gets to be the queen that year!â
âSo the fattest person gets to be queen?â
âYea! And then, every year all the townâs queens are weighed and whoever is the biggest of them gets to be Queen of the World!â
Interesting. I have done registration paperwork for planets with societies build around all sorts of status symbols, but weight was new to me.
âHow much do the queens normally weigh? Do you record things like that?â
âThe smaller queens weigh about 14 Notlits of gold, but the bigger ones are about 30!â
âGold?â
âOh yea! Queens have to have lots of gold, thatâs how they pay people like me and Brianna to feed them! The more gold they have, the more servants they can pay, and the more servants they pay, the more we feed them!â
âSo you feed the queens?â
âOh, I only feed my queen! And I only feed her milk, the ones like Brianna feed her the trees and dirt and things like that!â
Before I realized it, I had eaten the entirety of the cake log Carrie had given me, and I didnât even feel particularly full. Seeing this, she then pulled the fat, juicy meat off the spitroast and laid it down in my lap. Clearly, food was of cultural importance, and I wasnât feeling full, so I dug into the most amazing, tender, smoky meat Iâve ever eaten in my life. Maybe itâs just from being 6 months into an 18-month contract on Persephone and am too used to rehydrated quinoa and nutrient supplement, but this was the most incredible food Iâve ever eaten.
âWow Carrie, youâre a fantastic cook!â
âOh, this is nothing! It doesnât even have any of the good spices or any sides! Iâll tell you what, Iâll take you to my settlement tomorrow and cook you a REAL meal!â
âWould it be possible to see where the gold is stored?â
âFor sure! And Iâll get to introduce you to Brianna!â
âSounds great! Should I meet you out here at daybreak so you can take me?â
âWell I was thinking I could sleep with you tonight? Itâs awful dark and Iâd hate to fall into a Bibli pool.â
I suppose thereâs no harm in her spending the night, after all, she did cook for me.
I opened the door to the millipede and before I could pull out a mattress, Carrie curled up right on the ground and fell asleep. I retired to the cot I had set up and heard it squeal just a bit as I settled into it.
- Gewn Rosered (sent from Millipede Unit 33328)
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Hereâs a special treat for my long-waiting Kaemy & Nozomie
This is basically gonna be a summary of the YOI fanfics i've read so far so don't bother to read much of it if you don't want to have my library. Â
(Also for all writers sourced here, i really mean no offense by my sorting method : it was made in reguards to what my friends may or may not like, to not bother the ones who donât want smut at all, or just no PWP and so on. Iâve tried to sort it as i thought it would suit them the most, and iâm really sorry if i may have be disrespectfull by any mean.)
Ok so I KNOW GIRLS iâve been making you wait QUITE A LITTLE BIT. (hey see how iâm making you two work your english ? I know, i love you too.)
I donât really know how much of a fanfic youâve read so far, or ever for the matter, so iâm going to try a classification that will be obvious for you, and well, for others... I donât know if it will get anybody elseâs interest, but hey.
For a friendly reminder, i tend to read exclusively works revolving around romance, preferably viktuuri.
NO SMUT/SEX SCENE.
A Lesson In Wanting by @awesometinyhumanbeing (I hope your tumblr name being the same to the author of this fic is no coincidence, if else, sorry !) I ABSOLUTELY ADORE THIS FIC. It made me extend a 30 minutes sport session to a full 1h30 just to read the full story. Itâs a Royalty/Historical(ish)/Forced Wedding AU which turns out to be the cutest thing ever oh my god i canât even believe this fanfic.
Retirement!AUÂ by @skygemspeaks a short YOI prompt that went all around tumblr. Itâs about the possibility of Viktuuri retiring, going to get a degree, and their classmate discovering that theyâre famous. Itâs reaaaaally sweet.
When Googling Your Friend Gets Weird by @adrianners A lot of fic has resulted of the prompt above by SkyGem, but this one is my favorite i thing, it develops it very well !
On Our Love by @LiaoftheDawn Ok so this one is tagged as Mature cause there is sex implied, but there is no hard depiction, so i chosed to put it here, so, itâs up to you. Itâs angst with happy ending (best tag ever) and it crushed me well.
Like a Fairytale by @lucycamui wich is a Cinderella!AU (iâm so weak to Cinderellaâs story itâs a shame) very fluffy and lovely and well writen. Special thanks for Godperson!Phichit, that made my night.
New Beginnings and In Regards to Trust : Valediction by @phisen wich are following one another. These one also are rated M but i donât remember sex : there may be, but thatâs not what makes them memorable for me. Itâs about Yuuri moving to Russia and how the settling, the insecurities (wink wink) of the couple are worked out. Two of the first fanfics iâve read in the fandom, i love this author, itâs really (a little bit) angsty with fluff.
ROMANCE WITH SMUT.
Until My Feet Bleed & My Heart Aches (also known as umfb&mha) by the wonderful and queen of us all @kazliin IâM SO EAGER FOR YOU TWO TO READ THIS ONE OMG. This fanfic sets place in a Rival!AU which means that, well, there rivals (Yuuri hating Viktor to sum it up) and itâs really a really really famous fanfic in the fandom and it has driven me mad at least as much as YOI itself. The smut is character driven and is entirely part of the story and the character developpement, itâs crazy, i just canât stop reading this fic or everything that revolves around, iâm obsessed, god help me (i may want somedy to talk about this with ?) (i read it in like 48h ?) (this is really an obsession) (there is a fanbase just for this fic) (god help me)
You Canât Plan for Everything by @contentwhatcontent Ok so this one is really implying a lot of sex, starting really around chapter 20. Itâs set in the OmegaVerse (iâll explain to you girls if you donât know what it is, i donât really know how far you are in the fanfic thing), itâs reaaaaaaal slowburn with looooots of feels and i kind of really loves it ?
When you were young by again the great @phisen and OMG THIS FIC MADE ME CRY THE FUCK OUT OF MYSELF O.M.G. This is really angsty. There is one sex scene which is not really what the fic is about. Itâs about 40yo-Separeted!Viktuuri, and they meet again by accident and how this goes through. I really cried the fuck but O.M.G. this is sooooooo good, such a good story, so well writen. Must read, unless you donât want to be feeling like shit because of a story. (i personnally love it, donât judge me.)
After Everyone Else by @dance_across THE BEST THREESOME IâVE READ SO FAR OMG i didnât know i needed this until i read it and now my head is full of headcanons over it. Itâs really fluffy/sexy/with feels and i just love it. Threesome Viktuuri + Chris.
Call Everything on the Ice by @shysweetthing this one is reaaaaally fluffy. Itâs a bit of angst with a happy ending (still the best tag), itâs canon-divergent with Viktor learning Japanese and not knowing how to tell Yuuri. I love it ! The epilogue is the sweetest of things.
Unexpected by @alexwspark I reaaaally love this one, i started reading before the last chapters were released. I usually sum it up as âeverything is the same but slightly differentâ. Thereâs also angst with it, cause you know, i canât leave without a good amount of angst.
Growing up, growing in, by @Muspell this one is OtaYuri. Itâs about Yurio kind of acknowledging a beginning of feelings for Otabek, not knowing how to deal with it. Itâs very young-respectful, there is a bit of a sex-situation to some point, but treats about the age-gap relationships. I really found it good, i followed the update when the story wasnât completed yet. Thereâs Mila and Viktuuri being sweethearts also.
The Fundamentals of Caring by @actualyuuri omg i liked this one so much ! Itâs domestic pre-relationship sick!Yuuri with Viktor caring (ok itâs toothrooting fluff), and then the second chapter is more or less the smut part. Itâs veeeery fluffy.Â
Next Level : Nights After Dreams by @RipVanGabriel so this one is the only one so far on FF.net and not Ao3. And, well. Iâve started reading this fanfic at itâs very beginning. Itâs regularly updated. Itâs actually around 300k word and always growing. Itâs Viktuuri life after the serie, and it goes far ! There are several arcs, especially with Viktorâs family. Thereâs an arc with the wedding. An arc entirely dedicated to Yurio. Itâs quite complete actually, and even if iâm always a bit âmhm, where were weâ at each new update, there is always something new to read. Itâs actually very... going with the post-canon, but itâs a way to continue the story, if you like to feed on some kind of story. I quite like this one, and keeping track of it !
MOSTLY SMUT.
Basically, the porn that worked on me ; may not work on you.
Fracture a glass heart by @mimichiix Basically heated, post-ep7, good PWP.
Flesh by @thepossessedfangirl easy, musical, well-written rough sex.
Love Hotels & Instagram by @lucycamui Well the title of this serie speaks for itself i think ! Itâs established-relationship, funny, with sex, and the last part is with roleplay.
Fury On Ice by @AL_KILLER Itâs an anxiety and angst driven situation which leads to a nice make out ! Itâs post first kiss, but pre-relationship.
Please, Yuuri by @devotionkink Itâs fluff, then smut, with dom!Yuuri.
Good For Me by @neonsauce very nice bondage PWP !
Iâd still dance with you by @shapphicdalliances. This one is a OtaYuri ! Itâs AgedUp!OtaYuri, and this one basically got me with the very last line, which makes the fic memorable in my mind. Else, itâs mostly fluffy sex.
RAPE/NON-CON.
I put this one under trigger warning cause hey, you know how this is.
Canât Cover it Up by @kanekkis This one is all about being drugged, abused, and what ensues. Itâs very angsty and heart wrecking. All here is mostly about the developpement of depression afterwards and how to maybe cope. The depiction is really, really great. The last one i read to date !
(So girls, I have more in my waiting line, but now they are mostly or smut, or very long fanfics, or not finished yet so not my priority. I will continue to read and keep you update if you want haha. I hope this made up for the time waiting.)
And thanks again so much for all these dedicated author who write such stories ! I hope i havenât made any non-sense in talking about your work since iâm french and this post took me quite a time to write. If there is something to be done about this post, donât hesitate to tell me !
#yoi#yuri on ice#viktuuri#yoi fanfic#yoi fanfiction#yoi fanfics#yoi fanfictions#yuri on ice fanfic#hope there is nothing wrong with me posting such a post !
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Hot for Teacher - Chapter 1
'WELCOME TO NEWBURY COLLEGE! WHERE YOUR DREAMS ARE MADE INTO CAREERS AND YOUR ACADEMICAL GOALS ARE MET!' - Read the banner over the main entrance.
Lana signed up for classes in - Art, Music, Science, Drama, Math and English.
First class today was Math. The teacher was Mrs. Cunningham. She was a lady in maybe her 50s. Short and Polite.
Second Class was English Studies with Professor Miller.
Professor Miller...Lana scoffs at his name. He sounds like a old man she thought. She envisoned a moody old man with a walking stick, a vast collection of dull cardigans and baggy trousers. A full closet of Dullness.
Lana found herself lost, she was in the correct department for English but 3 different classes with 3 different teachers and all the doors were plain with no signs.
"Excuse me, do you know which of these rooms is Professor Miller's English Class please?" Â she asks a janitor mopping up water from a leak in the roof. "Yes ma'am, It's the door with the Black door handle just behind you' He says pointing and she thanks him. She turns and runs towards the door he pointed at and tries to sneak in without being noticed by the professor for being late. Too late. She turns slowly and awkwardly when she hears a voice "You're Late!" with a hint of annoyance and when she turns fully around to face the class, everybody is looking at her confused but amused.
Professor Miller is looking down at his desk writing something and he looks up to look in the large mirror at the back of the room for a split second to look at Lana. "Are you the new girl? because i don't think i've seen you in this class before!" He says. "Yes. It's my first day today" She replies. He drops his pen and turns to her and asks her to introduce herself to the class. He found himself oddly intrigued too.
"Hi, I'm Lana Simons. I'm 20 and i joined this college to further my already learned skills from school and because i missed school near the end due to pageants i wanted to pursue a real career" She says nervously.
*Professor Miller's POV*
Looking down at the previous day's students work that you didn't get chance to mark up the night before, you hear the door squeak open and notice somebody try to sneak in to class. "You're Late" You say, with a annoyed tone as you continue what you were doing before you heard the sneaky student. "Are you the new girl? Because i don't think i've seen you in my classes before!" I say, even though i haven't even really looked at her. She replies just as im about finished "Yes. It's my first day today". I throw my pen down, put my foot up on my desk and lean back in my chair as i turn to her after i asked her to introduce herself to the class. I still don't see her properly but i find myself looking her up and down. *Damn it Adam, What the hell is wrong with you! You can't look at your students that way!* He thought and sighs to himself.
*No POV*
After Lana introduced herself to everyone, her professor asks her to go and take a seat. she takes a seat in the chair directly in front of his desk, puts her bag under the chair and hears girls snickering and one shouts "Did you say you skipped school for Pageants? What kind of Pageants? Are you like a beauty queen or was one because i don't think your all that pretty!" They laugh, asking Lana. She replies "I did Miss Teen USA when i was 17, I had Pageants to qualify for that and represent my home state of Florida so i had to travel for that so i missed a lot of school then but i still qualified in everything i wanted to...so yeah!" she pauses "and erm, whatever 'your name' is. I'd appreciate it if you'd keep me out of your pathetic attempts of bullying cause its certainly not gonna work on me. I might be a Miss Teen Winner 3 years ago, but that doesnt mean that i don't know how to kick somebodys ass!" She smiles towards them smugly and gets a pen and book from her bag. Professor Miller is back to writing something down but smirks to himself at Lana's comment to those girls and looks up at her briefly. He wanted to see her face. Lana catches the Professor looking at her, he finds himself embarassed that he got caught looking and looks down for a second but looks back up again to see her smiling at him slightly and he sighs. He thought she was unbelievably gorgeous but he had to shake that off because she is his student and he could get into trouble for thinking things like that about somebody he will be teaching.
Lana's POV
**First day and ive already got girls making sly comments and gossiping about me! I shouldnt have mentioned those damn pageants. The only seat available was directly in front of the Professors desk. I take out my notebook and pen ready for what we are studying today. I just happened to glance up and the Professor was looking at me. My cheeks started to flush, I dont even know why. He's got such a intense stare, it makes you feel uncomfortable but still i find myself blushing. He stands and talks to the class.
"In the coming months we will be working on some gothic stories coming upto halloween - Dracula, Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde, Frankenstein...You get it! First story we will be working on is The Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Does anybody know the story? Anybody read the novel?" The room stays silent. "Is that the story with the man and a monster?" someone speaks up. Everyone laughs. "No, thats not correct. Strange Case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde focuses on John Utterson, a lawyer and friend of Dr. Jekyll. The novel begins with John Utterson talking with his other friend, who has just witnessed an odd situation. A man identified as Edward Hyde ran over a girl, only to pay off her family later with a check from Dr. Jekyll. It's a very interesting story. I will have you all read the entire novel and you will have assigned chapters to read out to the class and there will be questions in between so be prepared for those!" says Professor Lewis. He turns to write on the whiteboard the title of the story and who will be reading what chapter. I find myself looking him up and down. He's not what i expected. He's way younger than i thought hed be. Hes probably not even 30. Tall, Shoulder length wavy black hair, Broad shoulders, Â Intense brown eyes, Very serious, He's hot!!!! My professor is hot!!!! Help me!!! "Miss Simons, you will get chapter 6" He turned to look at me, catching me looking at his butt!! Oh lord swallow me whole pleaseeeeeeee!!! He smirked a little i just grinned at him like an idiot. He's going to think im a pervert and a freak.
****AFTER CLASS****
"Excuse me, Miss Simons" Professor Miller shouts me as im walking towards the exit still embarassed about earlier. Oh no! Is he going to shout at me for earlier. I walked towards his desk where he is sat at. "As you started my class late in the usual semester, you have missed out on a lot from the previous 6 months. if you have any chance at passing this class or any class in this college then you'll have to do a lot of extra work. Are you willing to do that Miss Simons. Now i could get into trouble for offering these as this college doesnt allow that sort of thing but im willing to give you extra classes until you catch up in my English Class. I can do from 4-7. Is that suitable for you?" Â He says. Phew! He didnt mention me staring at his butt. "Erm thank you. Yes that would be great. Thank you so much! Ill catch up in no time" I say. "No problem. Im taking time out of my personal life to do this so please dont let me down and i expect you to be here on time everyday." he says and I nod "Yes ill be here. I promise. Thanks again" I smiled. He smiles at me. Omg his smile is killer. He should smile more often "No problem. We'll start them from tommorow night as i have things on tonight. Dont be late to class tommorow either please" He replies and I nod again like a idiot "Yeah. Bye Professor"
**Professor. Lewis POV**
After my class, i pulled the new girl to one side. What was her name again. Ah yes! Lana Simons. I offered her extra lessons. i could get into trouble for that but it was a way to help her catch up and selfishly i wanted to spend some one on one time with her. I cant help it. I have Olivia but she has already cheated on me once already. I just know someday she will do it again. I just know it! When she does, i wont give her another chance even though i love her.
TBC.....
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