#to Sherlock ‘imagine if we were gay god look at all the fans who think they’re gay you’re stupid the show runners hate you’

[blodeuweddschild]

Uhhh something about the difference in BBC sherlock and Hannibal in the portrayal of an intelligent crime solving autistic man who’s also an a bit of (or a lot of) a dick

[writer-monster]

11 reasons why cap 4 should reintroduce Bucky Barnes as the love interest, an essay

to start this off, i am not writing this essay from a shipping place nor do i believe that this would have any influence at all over the upcoming movie. i expect nothing. this is simply something that i would personally like to see. (of course no hate to anybody who thinks differently)

here are 11 reasons why i think making Bucky into Sam Wilson's love interest in Cap 4 would be a good move for Disney.

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1. on the Chinese film market - and why it's an irrelevant argument against the inclusion of homosexual themes in Cap 4

the Chinese film market is something that has been blamed for a lack of diversity in Hollywood films a lot lately. many people claim that this market with a lot of buying power has been responsible for the lack of gay and black representation in particular within Hollywood films.

and we have certainly seen Hollywood treating it as such, going so far as to cut gay scenes from movies for their Chinese releases, and vastly minimising John Boyega's (a black actor's) presence in the Chinese poster of Star Wars The Force Awakens.

[image ID: on the left is an image of the American poster for Star Wars The Force Awakens, featuring John Boyega prominently on the right-hand side. And on the right is the Chinese poster for the same movie, in which John Boyega is barely visible.]

so we know at the very least that Disney believes this through their own actions and efforts to self-censor for the different markets.

but Captain America 4 is a black-led movie, don't you forget. and Disney can't minimise Sam Wilson/Anthony Mackie in the movie or the poster because it's his movie and his poster. and no amount of creativity in the editing room can change that (thank God!).

so if by their own argument the film is already going to be either banned, panned or slammed in China... then what do they have to fear from making it a gay movie too?

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2. oh, the queerbaiting

queerbaiting is an unusual cultural idea. and sometimes i find myself thinking that the term is far too easily used, but then all of a sudden i will stumble upon a movie or show that is so quintessentially cruel and overt in it's... well... queerbaiting that i will start to wonder what the hell kind of a bizarre relationship all these straight people seem to have with their friends. take Troy and Abed from Community or John and Sherlock from Sherlock as the perfect examples of this. (in which my reaction to the show's creators saying the show wasn't gay was to ask so then why did you make it so gay?!)

i felt that Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes in tfatws were getting quite close to this level of queerbaiting.

there was the field scene, the couple's counselling scene, the boat scene, the couple's counselling scene, Bucky going with Sam to face Karli when she told Sam to come alone, the couple's counselling scene, ALL the staring scenes, Sam checking out Bucky's ass here as they said goodbye, the "i would move in with him but" hidden scene, "Uncle Bucky" showing up at the cookout scene, the romantic walking off together into the sunset together ending scene, and the couple's counselling scene. did i forget anything? but i mean seriously, the couple's counselling scene!!! that thing they did with their legs and their crotches while staring deep into each other's eyes, would any straight guy willingly do that? do straight guys crotch-snuggle now?

[image ID: an image of Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes during the therapy scene with the quote, "Isn't anybody going to drag me into impromptu couple's therapy and slot my legs firmly between theirs before staring deeply into my eyes?"]

(yeah i stole this image from a buzzfeed article on the fan reactions to the couple's therapy scene. but given that they stole 80% of the content of that article from fandom tumblr, i think it's pretty even-steven.)

there's also the fact that people started talking about bisexual Bucky Barnes a lot after the tiger pictures line, and the lead writer Malcom Spellman responded to the talk of Bucky's bisexuality with "just keep watching". well we watched, Malcolm. but it's beginning to feel like you were just jerking us around.

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3. the writing

seriously though, what else is Bucky Barnes doing right now in the MCU? his only remaining connection to anything going on right now is through Sam. there is literally nothing else established that's left for him to do that doesn't involve Sam. he moved to Louisiana to be closer to Sam (canonically), he hangs out with Sam's family (canonically), and Steve is presumably gone and is definitely not coming back for more adventures.

he has no villains or loose ends left. he has no other superheroes that he appears to be in contact with. he has no girlfriend or potential love interest, or even other friends or family. he is living in a tent that he has secretly set up in Sam's backyard and is mysteriously appearing from the bushes when it's time for dinner like a stray cat.

in my opinion there is no other meaningful and pre-established progression for Bucky's character that wouldn't just feel cheap.

plus, i don't think the general audience would be all that surprised if they kissed. i think a LOT of people picked up on all that tension. i think a lot of straight people picked up on all that tension too.

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4. the chemistry between the actors & the chemistry between the characters

the original pitch for tfatws was essentially just this, it was the chemistry between Sebastian Stan and Anthony Mackie and their respective MCU characters of Bucky Barnes and Sam Wilson.

now obviously Anthony and Sebastian are simply friends, and i wouldn't mean to imply anything more. but they are also not their characters.

Sam and Bucky's scenes together before tfatws were both limited and short, and yet audiences still fell in love with the dynamic between the two characters.

in interviews, these two actors are constantly slipping into character and flirting with each other and frankly it's adorable. plus it's really entertaining. i'd love to see that dynamic, unfiltered, in a movie.

because believe it or not the flirting is actually even more open in their interviews than it was in tfatws. and i'm leaving some links as proof.

this here is known as the "married" compilation

and here's a "lucky dip" selection of interviews - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5,

and here's Anthony trying to get Seb to take his jacket off.

i'm just saying, why not let their chemistry shine? these two are so talented and so entertaining, especially when you put them in a room together. and can you imagine how absolutely hilarious and brilliant it would be to watch them navigate being a couple?

(and for those who bring up the "friends would be uncomfortable pretending to be dating" argument, i'm not here asking for a sex scene or anything. i don't think anyone would expect them to show any more intimacy (physical or emotional) while playing a couple than what they've already shown together in say... tfatws or in their own interviews. not that i actually expect anything regardless.)

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5. if they were a man and a woman they would've gotten together in tfatws

i have no more to add here. just that... yeah, they would've.

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6. and i'm not talking about the comics here, i'm talking about the MCU.

i understand fully that none of what i'm saying here falls in line with these characters from the comics. but the mcu itself doesn't fall much in line with the comics either, and these two characters especially are very different from their comics counterparts.

i'm not asking for these two to get together in the comics. tbh i don't think that it would work.

but the mcu Sam and Bucky are different and closer than their comics counterparts. they've got different histories, different backstories, and a very different dynamic. please rest assured that i am only talking about them in the mcu.

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7. Bucky Barnes is believably bisexual. and Sam Wilson has never been proven to be straight in the mcu, nor has he had a love interest.

(now please continue to keep in mind that these points only stand for the mcu versions of Bucky Barnes and Sam Wilson, and not at all for their comics counterparts.)

Sam Wilson has never had a love interest, which is crazy because have you seen that man! he has had two blink and you'll miss it moments of verbal expression of attraction to women, both in TWS. and that's the extent of it, through his entire history in the mcu.

Bucky Barnes has had a number of surface-level female love interests, but none of them even came close to the level of connection and chemistry that Bucky shares with Sam.

and i'm sorry SarahBucky fans, but i just don't think there's very much to their relationship either. i love Sarah, i really do. but it's Sam who shares all the meaningful moments and history and chemistry with Bucky. and i don't see what making her into a love interest would do for Sarah's character either, what would that add to her story?

[Picture ID: Bucky at the cookout with Sam, Sarah, Cass and AJ. Bucky and Sam are looking at each other and smiling.]

and also there is the whole tiger pictures thing... again. which does strongly suggest that Bucky is bisexual whether this was intentional on behalf of the writers or not.

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8. it's representation... AND it feels natural

marvel hasn't had a lot of queer representation that's been noticeably present in the MCU at the time of writing this.

there have been a lot of failures so far, from the bisexual erasure of Valkyrie in Thor Ragnarok to the wlw erasure in Black Panther.

there was queerbaiting almost identical to the bisexual Bucky baiting for Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2. when asked if he had considered featuring a gay hero in gotg2, director James Gunn stated that "We might have already done that. I say, watch the movie." after the movie's release audiences were understandably confused about the lack of queer representation. To which the director followed up his comments with, "But we don't really know who's gay and who's not. It could be any of them."

there is also Loki, considered by most fans after the airing of his six episode series on Disney+ to be both a poor attempt at both genderfluid representation and bisexual representation. with both attempts being summed up fairly well by the term "blink-and-you'll-miss-it". (also it's just terribly written and Loki doesn't wear any interesting clothes! fanficcers are a Goddamn blessing in this hard time!)

and let us not forget that Andrew Garfield was apparently FIRED for pushing for a bisexual spiderman. a bisexual spiderman within an interracial mlm relationship no less.

so for all these failures, marvel, why not allow us queer fans this? two brilliant and heroic men in a loving interracial relationship. two heroes that we can look up to.

now, one of the biggest detractions from the argument for representation is the idea of "forced diversity". and some poorly written characters certainly do end up feeling forced into the narrative. take Iceman in the comics for example, with Jean Grey just straight up suddenly telling him he's gay. like, marvel, sweetie, that's not how this works! and i don't know a lot of queer people who thought much of that "representation".

but the crux of the "forced diversity" argument is almost always that it feels unnatural within the story, right? and i don't think that anyone could say that about MCU Sam and Bucky ending up together, given these characters' existing chemistry and their history. they've both played characters in gay relationships before so we know that it's not outside of either actor's wheelhouse. and y'all know that Anthony and Seb can act, people. if it's in the script i believe that they'll make it seem like the most natural thing on earth.

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9. it'd be a nice change

there's been an ongoing meme lately about "Disney's first gay character", the joke being that they continually announce gay characters without really ever including gay characters in their films.

this is to the point where Disney has formed a reputation amongst queer audiences of being homophobic.

if Sam and Bucky were to become a couple, then Disney could have its first actual gay character within a gay relationship. AND have him be in the lead of his own movie, no less.

it's also worth keeping in mind that there's likely an overlap between the people who were outraged by a Sam Wilson Captain America, and the people who'd be outraged by a gay Captain America. and if they were already not seeing the film, then i don't think much is gonna change that.

queer audiences would definitely love it, and the media attention would be guaranteed to be huge. i mean, simply look at the amount of media attention mere rumours of a character's queerness gets you and multiply that by a canon confirmation of said rumours.

but i'm pretty sure that Disney already knows this.

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10. and yet, in truth, it's not about the representation

in truth i've never felt that i had any trouble relating to characters of any sexual orientation, race, gender, sex, body type, etc. (although that is not to throw any shade at all on people who do wish to see themselves represented) but for me, i think it's more about the story than the packaging.

and yet, a love story is still just a story. straight or queer, monoethnic or interracial. when two characters have chemistry and history and have sacrificed for each other time and time again, and they also can't keep their hands or their eyes off each other, then i'm pretty sure that that's a love story.

straight or queer, monoethnic or interracial, it shouldn't be about these simple labels. it should be about how well written the relationship is. it should be about chemistry, and history, and sacrifice.

because i'm fucking sick of all the hollow, forced romances in media no matter the genders of the participants. i'm sick of lazily written, shallow relationships where any two people sharing the same space for any extended period of time will simply fall in love. it's boring, it's repetitive, and as a writer myself it drives me up the wall!

romance stories suck! and everyone knows that romance stories suck. between twilight, and most of the entire YA genre, and love triangles (so boring), and romance used as poorly-written throwaway subplots in Hollywood movies, the world is in agreement that the romance in western media is simply dreadful. and yet we still want love stories. it's an entire genre that sits at the heart of the human experience (<3), and yet one which so few of today's best known writers seem truly able to capture.

i don't think that i'm the only one who feels this way, either. i suspect it's actually a large part of why fandom is so romance-centred in the first place, that we're all just starving for a good love story.

(btw i think fandom has a reputation for being something that as a whole that it is not. it has this reputation for straight up demanding things and harassing people until they get their way. while unfortunately there are a few people who do this, they're fucking annoying and i swear that they're far from the majority.

in my experience fandom is mostly about writing a five thousand word story at three am while drunk off your ass because it might make someone whom you've never met smile, editing it in the cold light of day, and then posting it. expecting nothing. sometimes getting nothing. and sometimes getting someone send you kudos or a comment so heartbreakingly wonderful that it makes you smile in return.)

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11. so once again, it is all about the writing.

i want to see Sam and Bucky get together in the mcu, not because they would be a gay couple but because i genuinely believe that their story has potential to be an amazing love story.

and i know the mcu isn't about the romance. it's why in my personal opinion we haven't gotten a lot of good canon romances besides Peter Quill and Gamora. and i don't think that the mcu should be all about the romance either. i fucking love the action and the fighting scenes. i love the comedy. Captain America: The Winter Soldier had no romance and it was a fucking treasure, it was an amazing spy-action-thriller and it made my little gay heart dance. Thor Ragnarok had no romance, and it was an utterly brilliant comedic spectacle action film. not every movie needs romance.

but mcu Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes were doing couple's therapy and fixing a boat and walking off into the sunset together in tfatws. they were inseparable on the battlefield. they've got a dynamic. it's beautiful, it's romantic, and it's gold.

a budding relationship between them in the next movie would be a good way to explore both characters more without the narrative feeling too stilted and separate. at the end of tfatws, both Sam and Bucky fans found that their respective fave felt somewhat underutilised and that their characters were underexplored.

now, that problem would be even more difficult to remedy in a movie, because the plotline of a movie needs to be really tight to work (giggity). and we know that the central conflict of the movie is gonna be action-based (which is good), but we still need each character's personal journey and growth to tie into the main conflict. (which is another issue that some fans found with tfatws, that these characters didn't really feel connected to the action-based plot on a more personal level.)

if Sam and Bucky are already in a relationship, however, this whole dynamic changes. first, their relationship has already been set up for nicely since TWS and through tfatws and they would officially be the best-fleshed-out couple in the mcu. but most importantly, a relationship gives them a perfect vehicle to explore both of their pasts comparatively and connect them personally to the action-based plot.

do you want to establish that Sam is a little too trusting and naïve? then establish this through his relationship with Bucky, and through showing his placing his trust in Bucky. (rather than through having him sympathise with a villain who threatened to murder his sister and his nephews).

perhaps you want to show Bucky recovering from his trauma? show us how comfortable he is with Sam. they get along, they're enjoying each other's presence, we see more of Sam's life and of his family, and then let Bucky tell Sam something that's raw and dark and honest about his life as The Winter Soldier. something about a memory, one that he only just recalled. he's opening up. and maybe what he tells Sam is even something that sets up the future action-based conflict, to ground that in something real.

you want to explore that Sam has trauma too? do this through Bucky. he tells Bucky a story about his time in the military. in the form of a flashback, he shares his own story of loss to evoke before the audience the shared theme of feeling at fault even when you're simply a helpless bystander to an act of pure destruction.

then, action sequence! and it's directly connected to Bucky's time as the Winter Soldier. explore the grief of someone whose life the Winter Soldier tore apart manifesting into a villain perpetuating the cycle of pain. establish your villain.

Later, Sam is dragged into battle against this villain for protecting Bucky. But Bucky doesn't want Sam to protect him. He feels guilt for what he can't control and he doesn't want Sam getting hurt because of him. Bucky reminds Sam that he has a family, one who needs him and who loves him. He tells him to go home.

Sam reminds Bucky that he's a part of that family. And that sure Sam's a hero and his job is to protect anyone and everyone, but that he's doing it because he wants to. It's not simply to prove that he can, or to prove that he's not a bystander (this connects to Sam's trauma here), but that he's doing it to help people.

and this gets Bucky thinking about who he is and what he's doing here. is he a hero who stands by Sam's side? or is he an ordinary man who stands aside? or perhaps, does he stand alone? what does he stand for? Maybe Sam knows. But does Bucky?

Sam and Bucky fight off the villain again, and for the first time Bucky meets this adversary face to face. And Bucky recognises this villain, and has a flashback to the genuine pain that he inflicted upon them in the form of the Winter Soldier. Bucky freezes mid-fight, he almost dies, and Sam has to save him.

Sam chews Bucky out for almost getting killed because he was afraid for him. but Bucky takes this the wrong way and goes off to fight the villain alone, or perhaps to die alone, he's not quite sure.

He puts up a half-hearted fight. He apologises for what the Winter Soldier has done, and he waits for the killing blow, when Sam swoops down and he saves him. He asks Sam why he saved him and Sam calls him a moron. And then, Sam asks him what sacrificing himself would solve. He tells him that you can't choose your past but you can choose your future (connecting to his own experience of loss and guilt and grief). And that no matter what Bucky Barnes still has a future, whether that's as the Winter Soldier or the White Wolf or just some dork with a day job. And that he has a future as a part of Sam's family too.

Sam fights the villain, and it's toe to toe. He delivers a few good blows, but receives a fair few himself. And then the villain tears off his wings, first one and then the other, in a manner reminiscent of what the Winter Soldier did to him in TWS. Through Bucky's eyes there's a flashback to highlight the parallels. Sam gets back on his feet and he fights his best fight, but is now losing.

And then the heavily injured Bucky steps up and fights by Sam's side, and only together do they take down the villain.

"So... I inspired you, huh?" Sam teases with a smile, utterly exhausted. "With my heroism and-"

"You inspired me." Bucky said, equally exhausted. "Let's leave it at that."

Together, Sam and Bucky go back to the safety and warmth of their family. Sam fixes his wings. Sam goes back to being Captain America. And Bucky... he's around, but it's unclear what he's doing.

That is, until the very end. When Sam is in a fight, and suddenly Bucky shows up and helps him out.

"What are you doing here?" Sam asks.

"I've made up my mind." Bucky says. "I'm the Winter Soldier. But now I'll save lives, Sam. Now, like you, I'll be a hero."

Sam smirks. "So does this make you my sidekick, then?"

Bucky smiles. "C'mon, at least make me a partner." He says.

"How about co-workers." Sam says (in flashback, he remembers back to the death of his last on-the-job partner).

"How about friends." Bucky says, with a wry look.

"Bucky... I don't want to see you put your dumbass self in danger." Sam says.

"Oh, and it's ok for you to go running off into danger on your own all the time?" Bucky asks.

"Yes." Sam says stubbornly. "Absolutely it is."

"Why?"

"Because I'm not a dumbass?!"

"Sam, if you think I'm not gonna be watching your back for the rest of time... then you're the biggest dumbass I know. And I don't care if you need me or not, I will be there for you."

"Because Sam, you're more than Captain America. You're more than a good soldier. You're a good man. And I think sometimes, the world forgets what the difference is."

-

...or something like that.

(i only spent like 15 minutes on that. you know if i were actually writing this movie i would come up with something much better. and if anyone from marvel is seeing this, yes i can come work for you. i will make the time, let's do this thing right!)

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finale

at the end of the day, whether or not the mcu chooses to make Sam Wilson and Bucky Barnes a couple, it's their decision. and they don't owe me anything.

i'm just some random person on the internet. who thinks that Captain America 4 should #givecaptainamericaaboyfriend

[olderthannetfic]

I’m laughing my ass off. This reminds me of when I was at a fannish party back in... 2012? 2013?

One of the hosts excitedly asked us if we were into MCU. I said yes, and she aggressively shoved her art portfolio at me. It was entirely manips of Stony. I loathe MCU Stony. I also don’t like manips, but it was really the ship that stuck with me. Because she didn’t ask if we liked Stony but whether we liked MCU.

Anyway, that’s a longwinded way of saying that while I was “in” MCU for a hot second, that doesn’t mean I was in that part of it.

I ignored Iron Man 1. I was too angry at how its unexpected success destroyed any chance my beloved Speed Racer had of breaking even. Speed Racer is one of the most aesthetically adventurous films of its decade and offensively underrated at the time. (Hilariously, all the film bro blogs changed their tune in like 6 months, years faster than I expected.) It’s one of the only films I’ve seen multiple times in the theater. (The others being The Man from U.N.C.L.E., which was similarly buried by another film, and Deadpool 2.)

A while later, I was looking up fanvids that use music from Highlander as part of making a vid to mess with a friend. She said any song can be used for anything except for that one because it belongs to Highlander. She was joking, but I thought it would be funny to use the song for something else... only I couldn’t remember which one she’d said, so I used both Princes of the Universe and Who Wants to Live Forever to make fun of all the emo Sherlock vids post S2.

I was shocked to discover that talitha78 actually had vidded Who Wants to Live Forever, and it was a really shippy vid of something I hadn’t seen and didn’t even recognize. So that’s how I watched Captain America: TFA. I have one great narrative weakness, and it’s people being fake or temporarily dead. Needless to say, when I found out what happened with Bucky in comics, I was very interested.

I got into MCU at that point, right before Avengers came out. I ate a lot of shawarma.

Avengers made me ship Science Bros like mad. Bruce was hands down my fave. I also read some Pepperony on LJ. I find MCU Tony insufferable, but I liked his vibe with both Pepper and Bruce. I also read some Tony/Pepper/other dude OT3s, even Tony/Pepper/Steve despite me thinking MCU Stony was intensely chemistryless at the time.

But honestly, the fic I probably read the most of was something I didn’t even ship myself: Clint/Coulson. I loved Coulson. I love characters coming back. And I’m weak for tropey handler/asset. C/C at the time was practically just original m/m with faces grafted on, and there were some great fics.

I also read a lot of trashy Mary Sue Darcy fic. That was everywhere in 2012. Darcy joins SHIELD. Darcy is Coulson’s secret child. Darcy dates Coulson. Darcy fucks her way through the Avengers. Darcy has a freaky blue baby with Loki. Darcy fucks Jensen from The Losers. (In fact, there is more Darcy/Jensen than a bunch of MCU ships that actually make sense.)

Then The Winter Soldier came out. I walked in a stucky shipper. I walked out thinking “Bucky who?” I was blown away by how that movie, like Cap1, is off in its own aesthetic universe. The whole film, I kept going “Oh my god, it’s Three Days of the Condor! Right down to the color palette!” Imagine my amusement to find out that the directors were calling it “Three Days of Captain America”. I was also blown away by Sam. The imperturbable friend who’s too sane to crumple under your bullshit! My weakness!

After that, I read a bunch of fic with Sam, Steve, Natasha, and Bucky in various configurations.

So, okay, yes, I did read some stucky. But even back then, I was seeing a rise in stucky-only fans whose work wasn’t so much my thing. There was a lot of lipservice to “historical accuracy” and fellating of anybody who’d read Gay New York and wanted to show off their learnings. I’ve read that book, and it’s great, but the attitude made me roll my eyes. In my experience, “historically accurate” just meant justifying some specific kink for femme Steve with Steve as a fairy and Bucky as trade. (More on what those referred to in this book review. Basically, femme vs. masculine guy who fucks women and femmes.)

I drifted away from MCU some time after that. I’m not good at staying into canons that are too sprawling or things that are too popular in general, especially if they’re very OTPy. (My stay in BTS fandom is shockingly long for me. I chalk it up to the sheer quantity of OT3s and multishipping.)

The big thing I noticed was that in addition to a lack of fic about Sam, a lot of what there was was distinctly boring. People were afraid to write iddy trash for obvious reasons. Not so with stucky, which has always been iddy trash central. Curse The Winter Soldier for robbing me of my ability to care!

I was excited about the idea of Bucky and Sam in a buddy show despite not having seen MCU in years, but friends’ reviews made me think it would be a letdown, and I haven’t bothered to watch.

I don’t know the big internal dramas in stucky fandom after I left MCU. I’m sure they have been legion. I get the impression that many of them have boiled down to “You are more popular than I am, and that is not okay.”

It’s such a large ship and has so many OTPers who don’t necessarily interact with other parts of MCU fandom that I don’t know how many of those dramas have leaked out elsewhere. MCU is like Harry Potter fandom in that way: there are tons of completely separate camps, and one might or might not be in multiple of them. It’s not even a question of disliking each other: it’s just too big to be in all of.

Given how overwhelming and hard to get into Stucky is at this point, I would just read the fic and not worry about interacting--unless you want to? TBH, ships like that aren’t that easy to get into in a social sense. I’ll still read the occasional fic if I get a rec. I read that one where they go to the Captain America film festival, and it’s a hilarious parody of gay French art films and subtextually homoerotic 1980s US action movies. I also read that one where Steve contacts a professor of queer history looking for info about his past friends and Bucky bugs her office. (I’m certainly not immune to the history nerdery. I just find it lulzy when people go “FACT!” and mean “I love femme Steve!”)

[impostoradult]

This is time that was allotted to these storylines by canon, offering an expectation of meaning and importance, offering what results in a promise—not time the fans imagined or made up, not something they feel nebulously entitled to, but time they spent on plots the canon gave to them. (Cas means something to Dean after all these years and a love confession. Bucky means something to Steve after all these years and a snap. Jaime’s project of growth and his meaningful relationship with Brienne is something worth investing in.) But instead of saying, yes, you spent all this time watching these scenes, feeling these moments, taking this in—you grew with this character, with these relationships (grew in many cases away from the set starting point)—here is your promised meaning, again and again, these properties snatch the rug away and then pretend blithely they cannot understand why “entitled fans” are so upset.

I’ve been meaning to write my version of this argument for a while now, and I suppose this article is just as good a reason as any.

My thesis, in short, is that lack of queer representation actually isn’t what is creating ~the problem~ here. What’s creating the problem is the overriding power of heteronormativity as a kind of ‘trump’ story logic that is allowed to steamroller everything else into oblivion. (And yes, there actually is a substantial difference between those two things)

Sub-thesis 1: Representation Actually Isn’t A Strong Argument for Destiel (or any particular ship/character)

Controversial, I know.  The representation argument (while an extremely valid argument as applies to popular culture in general) is actually not a very good argument when it comes to why Dean should be explicitly queer and Destiel should have been consummated. 

For one, there’s no reason -- exclusively from the standpoint that it is a moral imperative that queer people are represented in media -- why any particular character or set of characters should be that representation. The ethical cultural mandate to represent marginalized groups does not mandate that any one character or set of characters in any particular given story be that representation*. Yes, even if you as a member of that marginalized group happen to identify with that character. Even then, it isn’t OWED to you. (I think writers should take those trends of identification seriously, and think about what it means to marginalized groups, and act accordingly. But I don’t think it creates an OBLIGATION)

*I’d argue the primary caveat to this would be in stories where the character’s situation or arc is directly related to struggles experienced by that marginalized group (i.e., casting mostly white actors in stories where those characters are experiencing racial oppression)

For another, if representation of queer characters were primarily dictated by fandoms, 90% of queer characters in media would be white, conventionally attractive men. (That might be overstating it a bit, but fandoms have serious biases when it comes to shipping and what kind of characters they latch onto for queer interpretation, and that’s one of the reasons I’m grateful queer representation is not primarily linked to our tastes/preferences). 

The representation argument is a very valid argument when examining popular culture as whole, and when looking at broader trends for example, within a genre, or a whole network. But no particular TV show is obligated to make particular characters within it queer just because representation is a moral imperative as a broader cultural issue. 

Sub-Thesis 2: Heteronormativity Creates Stupid/Badly Constructed Stories

The actual problem here is how heteronormativity creates a kind of trump logic that overrides coherent storytelling. 

I’m not upset about what happened on Supernatural because I think we missed out on representation. There is actually plenty of ~better~ representation elsewhere, and there will continue to be more as time goes on. The representation issue is peripheral at best when it comes to analyzing what went ‘wrong’ with Supernatural. 

The key issue here is that stories need to make sense, not just in terms of plot (although that matters), but in terms of character growth, emotional arcs, etc. The ending of Supernatural is bad because it treated massive pieces of character growth and one of the most significant emotional arcs of the whole show as if it was ultimately inconsequential -- which is bad storytelling and doesn’t make sense. 

And YES, we are ‘owed’ stories that make sense. It’s not entitled to want a story to be coherent, because coherence is what makes a story a story, and not just a series of random meaninglessly assembled plot points/fictional anecdotes. 

The problem is, Hollywood writers keep writing themselves into situations where emotional coherence basically requires an explicitly queer dynamic (or at least a strongly subtextual one), and then just being like...but these characters aren’t queer so we can’t do that. Instead, let’s end Steve’s arc by sending him back in time to live a heterosexual life with Peggy, disregarding the HUGELY significant plot points related to Steve/Bucky which grounded multiple entire movies within the MCU (Winter Solider, Civil War). Let’s end Sherlock by inventing a random, long-lost Holmes sister never remotely hinted at or foreshadowed and make that incomprehensible plot point the finale, when the entire series has been grounded in John and Sherlock’s relationship. 

Let’s make it canonically clear Cas’s love for Dean is the one single act of pure free will in a world with a malevolent God trying to manipulate everyone’s lives for his own amusement, and that Cas’s love for Dean is the only thing keeping the primary story-universe of Supernatural intact, because every other version of Sam and Dean in every other universe kill each other as God intended. Let’s make it clear that Cas’s betrayal of heaven due to his love for Dean is literally propping up their entire universe, but then end the story by pretending like it’s not that important after all. Castiel who?

And it’s just like...THAT DOESN’T MAKE SENSE! It doesn’t make fucking sense. It’s bad writing. So why would you do it? (I mean, I being a bit facetious here. I know exactly why. Because the precious feelings of homophobes will be hurt, and companies don’t want to lose out on their money) 

It’s not entitled to want a story to make sense. It’s not entitled to want major plot points and character arcs and emotional dynamics to have resolutions that follow from what came before in the story. 

And I’m sorry, but you are a ridiculous person if you watched Dean grieve Castiel’s ostensible deaths in s7 and s13 (both times becoming nearly catatonic, nihilistic, more self-destructive than usual, and borderline suicidal over losing Cas) and try to argue to me that his shrug-it-off attitude towards Cas’s death/loss in the finale makes any goddamn sense at all. 

It is utterly inconsistent with everything that has happened before in Supernatural regarding Dean and Castiel’s relationship. It’s incomprehensibly incoherent and just stupid. (And that is just the absolute tip of the incoherence iceberg because to fully explain why the ending of Supernatural re: Destiel doesn’t make sense we’d have to review over 300 episode’s worth of content, and there isn’t time for that) 

I’m just so sick and so tired of being asked to pretend to be stupid because you know, man, heterosexuality. They’re not gay!!1! 

The exhaustion I feel, as a queer viewer, in fact is not borne out of lack of representation. The representation issue is very much on an upward trajectory and I’m not worried about the future of TV not being queer enough. I’m not. 

The exhaustion and frustration and anger I feel as a queer viewer is borne of having to repeatedly watch stupid endings to good stories because the story can only make sense if you make it queer (you cowards). I’m tired of being asked to develop dumb amnesia disease in order to consume endings to stories that had to blow everything up at the end to (re)enforce a heterosexuality that can only stand on a foundation of utter incoherence and contradiction to monumental things that came before it.

I am JUST SO TIRED of being asked to sacrifice my intelligence, my basic logic and critical thinking skills, and my ability to remember basic narrative beats at the alter of almighty Heterosexuality, supreme ruler of all cultural output and destroyer of good queer things. 

Heterosexuality isn’t owed my stupidity, and I’m not entitled for wanting stories to make sense. YOU are entitled for demanding my stupidity when you wrote that dumb shit and expected me to act like it wasn’t dumb simply because it was heterosexual. 

No, the heterosexuality is exactly the reason it IS dumb. 

[trutrustories]

Okay, this will be probably long and with many errors (my english isn´t very good) But I saw several posts here on Lokius tag, talking about this ship as result of gay fetish, and about non existing chemistry and  how this ship doesn´t make sense etc… And from what I understood there is tagged Lokius because of genuine interest to understand others point of view, so here is mine: I wil try to explain where my frustration comes from, and how I feel about Lokius, Sylkie, AND representation + some other things which I saw here somewhere. But first of all: I like Sylvie, I don´t hate sylkie shipers, and after so many years reading fan fictions, I don´t mind selfcest – I read weirder things. I have some issues with this ship (the mainlythe fact that it isn´t Lokius), but  this is not one of them. Also, I am not about to tell anyone, they shouldn´t ship sylkie.Ship whatever. And I LOVED the show as a whole. 

I just want to defend my standpoint, that Lokius does make sense, people shipping it does make sense and whether it will happen or not, (I don´t have my hopes very high, and I learned to be very skeptical in this regard ) it is more than just about crack ship, or fetish. I´m honestly blown away that people are still surprised that this ship became a thing :D First of all, let´s look at some romantic story telling and tropes: I mean the way they introduced them in the first two episodes set the tone for all series and how the heck this isn´t romantic? Somehow there are all these romantic tropes existing in a show. They´re just there. Just chilling between Loki and Mobius and large portion of audience can´t even see them. (and some of those tropes were used for Sylki as well, so you could actually see them side by side)

For example: 1) traveling to the apocalypsis 2) breaking law/rules for the other 3) literally changing for the better thanks to the other 4) arguing like old married couple 5) saying secrets, personal things to the other 6) sharing glances, touches, visibly being happy around each other - in case of Loki happier then we´ve ever seen him before 7) being completely themselfs around each other 8) One knowing everything (even the worst) about other and still accepting him completely 9) teasing, being comfortable and domestic around each other 10) one being literally enthusiastic FAN of the other 11) Mobius defending Loki whenever he has a chance 12) Freaking amnesia trope that they pulled of in the end??? (It could be different Mobius, but point is he suddenly doesn´t know him - and Loki knows more, in contrast with the beggining) 13) the jealousy in ep4 14) Misunderstanding - when Mobius thought Loki betrayed him and Loki (thanks to Ravonna) thought Mobius betrayed him... 15) witnessing death of the other and being absolutely broken afterwards 16) The goodbye hug with romantic music in the backround 17) Saving life of the one (even when it means problems for the other ) - like Mobius saved Loki´s ass at least three times when he was trying to stop others from pruning him. 18) sharing deep conversations about meanings of life, freedom and how it would be fun to make some chaos and ride that fucking jet ski!!! 19) Inspiring the other 20) looking for each other (Mobius didn´t believe for a second, that Loki would die in the Void and the way how in the last minutes of the series Loki run through all places they were together when he was looking for Mobius... and I could go on. Point is, even if they are not planning to make Lokius canon, all these things are used on a daily basis to describe romance in media and they are used here. On top of that it´s just very poetic and cute, that this drama queen and powerful god of Asgard who looked down on people would find his match in someone, who is so quiet, ordinary on the first sight, and basically is just human from 90s, who loves jet skis. Mobius can´t even fight. But is highly inteligent and he also happen to be as good manipulator, such as Loki himself. - That´s why they work together so well. Mobius sees right through him and once Loki understands that, he drops his evil persona. Almost nobody expected to ship it for real. But story itself and chemistry between them just made it probably the most exciting duo in the whole MCU. And I mean it genuinely. Third episode, even though it was beautiful and Sophie was great in it (and is literally dipped in bisexual colors), is the least favorite for a reason. And that reason being, there is no interaction between Loki and Mobius whatsoever. Lot´s of people though that series slowed down a bit. Even when in fact there was more action, then when we watched Loki and Mobius working at the TVA.

(and let´s just talk about evil!Mobius narative for a bit and how some people say he is manipulative and toxic for Loki: show itself explore heavy themes and one of them is in Loki´s line: no one bad is ever truly bad and no one good is ever truly good. And as a theme in a fictional world, it is working as it should, for the  story. When Loki and Mobius meet, one of them just killed lots of innocent people and destroyed almost whole city. The other one is a part of fascist organization – and in the beginning of the series they both believe what they´re doing is right. They´re both bad, they´re both good, they´re both broken. And they are changing with the help of the other.) From all reactions I watched - and there was many of them, lots of people actually didn´t see dynamic between Loki and Sylvie as romantic in the third episode. So it´s not like Sylvie and Loki had unequivocally love story right from the start.

The only difference is that lots of people won´t see romantic tropes, when it comes to two men in a mainstream show – show that isn´t primarily about relationships and problems that queer people has to face. Because in super hero story and science fiction we have to warn audience, that they´re about to watch two man in love, right? At this point It´s just frustrating really. There were many M/M dynamics that used similar story line, as for example Lucifer, or X-files, or Bone collectors. -  But unlike those M/M pairings, no one was making fun of people for shipping main characters in these shows. But when it comes to two men suddenly you´ll see from all corners of the internet: “why can´t it be just platonic?” “There is not enough platonic relationships” “why can´t two man just be friends?” (They can and they almost ALWAYS are) and “if you think there something romantic between them, you´re delusional” “fetishist“ “And for god´s sake just let them be friends, Loki needs a friend more then....” oh wait, but Sylvie is allowed to kiss him. Sylvie doesn´t have to be just friend. (And I must say, that I love Sylvie, I liked most of the interactions between her and Loki and I think she is a great character ((I hope we learn more about her in the future)) it just doesn´t work for me as well as Loki´s dynamic with Mobius. Maybe partly because of chemistry between actors, partly because combination of characters and they´re personality and also because I had two whole episodes to fall in love with the pair before Sylvie was even introduced.)

First of all: people can be friends and then evolve into lovers. Not only it is common romantic trope, but it is also the most realistic one. And those relationships are usually strongest. second: If people want to see Loki in a platonic friendship so desperately, why can´t it be a woman for a change? They were acting like chaotic siblings for most of the episode three anyway. The age gap aspect is also very funny. Owen is only about 12 years older (That is not that much. But I imagine, some people would get uncomfortable. But If it was man and woman, most of them wouldn´t even blinked. But two men, that has to be somehow automatically son and father figure dynamic) And If you want to dive into age of an actual characters, then good luck with that in a series about gods, variants and time travel. Almost nobody cares about age gap between Lucifer and detective Decker, or Bella and Edward. On top of that, it was heavily implied, that Loki slept with older, silver haired guy in Ragnarok, so it´s not like he would have problem with that.

Different standards are projected in a way how we see romantic dynamics between fictional characters depends on what we are used to, how are we perceiving world around us, what we are expecting to see and ALSO, what we would like to see, that much is true.  When people are used to make no differences between heterosexual and homosexual pairing, then everything what happens to the characters is measured with the same meter. (Even though I experienced queerbaiting many times (( Once upon a time, Sherlock, Supernatural, Good Omens – the last one hopefully is not the case, but I guess we´ll see)) I also saw lots of lgbt shows like Queer as folks and Sense8.) And when we are not used to see it the same way, well… then it looks basically like that one comment under Castiel´s “I love you” scene on youtube, that said  “what a beautiful friendship”.

If we forget about all that chaotic mess behind the scenes (all those articles and contrary messages)  What is happening in a show between Loki and Mobius can be objectively considered romantic and what is happening between Loki and Sylvie in a series can be objectively considered platonic (until the kiss) and vice versa.  And then to see comments about how absurd it is to even think they have chemistry, and about gay fetish - it´s hard to swallow. I read posts about absurdity of a ship and how there is absolutely nothing that would suggests romance.  Well there is, actually. But whether creators are going to work with it or not, that´s something we can only speculate. They already made Loki officially bisexual. So why should it be so absurd to assume, that there is an actual possibility of romantic subplot between Loki and Mobius? Oh right… it´s Disney and Marvel we are talking about.

So on a subject of bisexuality: Bi people can date whoever they want.  But It is a little frustrating, when there is so many heterosexual pairings in the mcu and disney but when there is a promise of lgbt character (speaking of endgame) we get one line about date from a man we´ll never see again. And when there is a promise of lgbt representation you can´t even blink during movie, or you´ll miss it (Star wars, Beauty and the beast). And then Loki said “A bit of both, I suspect the same as you”. And I won´t lie, I was happy. And I think creators made biggest step yet with this one line (which is honestly terrible, that “a bit of both” coming from Loki of all people, is the biggest step forward.) But they played it VERY safe. Obviously, both Loki, and Sylvie are bisexuals, and in three episodes, we had Loki flirting with female flight attendant, Sylvie talking about her relationship with POSTMAN and then they fall for each other. So the only thing that suggests they are really as bi as Lamentis 1 is that little sentence, that can be edited out, or easily overheard. It´s the bare minimum. And I think that frustration with how freaking slowly we´re moving into some progress is understandable. From all those great M/M dynamics I talked about, those, that could make great love story, nothing happened, because too many people “don´t mind gays but don´t need to look at them” or are scared for their children. In 2021.

It is not a fetish to wish for a gay love story in superhero movies/series. (But anyway, I don´t think there is anything bad about it. Some men like to watch lesbian porn, some woman like to read gay porn. AO3 wouldn´t be were it is today, without people reading and writing slash :D – but that has little to do with what we actually see on tv)

I´m not delusional. As much, as I love these two characters together, I know how little chance it has.  I´m not delusional. I´m just in the future, old and tired, waiting hundreds of years for at least one of my OTP to finaly become a fucking canon.

[annethepancake]

Sherlock rant

I recently rewatched BBC Sherlock for Rupert Graves, and aside from the lack of Lestrade appreciation I have a lot of problems with this series. Here are my thoughts:

1. It was all a blur

My second first impression of the show: I don't remember anything but the characters. And some characters I just blatantly forgot, like Mary. And I loved Mary on my second watch! I really forgot that at one point John actually got married and I don't even remember when I watched the show for the first time. I can still recall most of HIMYM's events and I hated that series.

2. It’s overall not a detective/crime show

Watching Sherlock for the second time, I mostly turned off my brain and just let it play in the background because (1) there's hardly anything for me to solve with the characters, most clues are taken by Sherlock off-screen anyway (especially after season 2), (2) they focus way too much on the quirks of the characters that make it almost like a sitcom that got dragged on for way too long. A crime/detective show shouldn't allow me to turn off my brain.

3. The characters just kinda fall flat

Exploring the depth of human emotions is not a bad approach to a modernized version of anything, I’m not trying to pretend I’m better than someone who gets sentimental over fictional character (if you know my blog at all, you know I am not), but at least write good characters. Sherlock is hardly a multi-faceted person; in fact, he’s kinda like the Wattpad teen fic main character sometimes. He physically fights off some terrorists with a machete to save the damsel in distress? He gets high off his tits but still got everything right all the time? John is just kinda there for most of the cases. Jim is a poorly written antagonist. Irene is a lesbian but gets the hot for our main character, surprise surprise. The only interesting characters to me are the ones who act like normal people: Molly, Greg and Mary. They are the multi-faceted characters, ones who I can actually relate to without feeling inferior to them in any way. Write characters like them, stop trying to be smart about it and stop writing Wattpad fanfictions for Sir Conan Doyle’s original works.

I get that they try to make Sherlock more like a human with emotions, making him quirky and arrogant, then make him quirky and more likable. It’s hardly a convincing character development though. He’s given over-powered deduction skills, so edgy, so high and mighty all the time. When he is finally written as vulnerable, turns out he has plans for that too. I would love to see him get it wrong once and maybe get humbled by that mistake, but getting Mary shot and killed is hardly even his fault, he is only doing his job. And killing off Mary is overall a bad idea anyway.

4. They treated the fandom like shit

I was absolutely disgusted at the start of season 3 when the showrunners just straight up shat on their fans. I wasn't there with the fandom during the wait between season 2 and 3, but I believe it was a pretty long wait (2 years, I could barely wait 2 years for my comfort series, and they have like 10 episodes per season), and they were presented with the first actual mystery of the series: How did Sherlock survive the fall? After years of waiting and having fun theorizing, they were met with a mockumentary about them, starring the most hated character of the protagonist and the fans. Those are the people who actually cared about the show for god's sake. The fact that the showrunners treated fans like crap and there's still an active fandom for the show appalled me.

Now not only The Empty Hearse bugs me, but the entire show does as well.

Allow me to digress.

Doki Doki Literature Club is a great example of audience engagement done right (Sorry for using this example I’m not actually that invested in the other franchises). After the success of the first game, the story provoked so many fans into solving the mysteries of the characters, some of them went really, really far. And that’s because of the actual mysteries that the development team took effort to plant into the plot. There is actual pay-off for painstakingly following the clues; as far as I know, only two (2!) people in the world have come close to solving the mystery of the first game (or they actually did). The game developers value their fans and their intelligence enough to have planted those clues where they did, and it’s a genuine exchange between the fans and the creators. Now even though you haven’t actually played the game, when you hear of the name and you’re only kinda familiar with gaming (like me), you’ll probably know what it is. What started as a mere open-source game by an indie developer became a sensation which left millions of fans begging for more.

Looking back at Sherlock, there are tons of logical flaws for a self-proclaimed crime series, virtually no clues for the audience to solve crimes along with their favorite detective, and when there was actually a mystery (Sherlock jumped off the building), they plainly showed him alive and well minutes later. Do we really need to see things spelled on screen to know what’s going on? Are we supposed to accept that Sherlock Holmes is an all-knowing future-predicting genius now too? Not a great sign of respecting the audience there.

So far, the only thing left that’s interesting about this series is the characters’ dynamic. Which brings me to the next criticism I have for the show.

5. The plague that infested mainstream media

Why is there still an active fandom? Queerbaiting and targeted marketing.

Community marketing is proven to be one of the best marketing methods there is, if not the best, to lengthen the lifespan of a product or service. The way they do that for shows and films and video games is usually by planting seeds of possible lores and history inside the content. Look at Harry Potter or Lord of the Rings, they are franchises that ran for multiple years with a ton of history and world building that provokes fans’ imagination.

Sherlock - well, Sherlock has sexually ambiguous men.

Sherlock has a formula for success. It was an adaptation of the most iconic detective novel in the world, funded by one of the biggest TV networks in the UK and possibly the world (don’t quote me on this). Making this series means you can appeal to such a wide group of audience even before airing. Adding in the quirky smart men who live together, you’ve basically guaranteed a prime-time show with millions of loyal fans all over the world.

Fans are not stupid, and queer people don't just find queerness everywhere they go. They know a gay subtext when they see one. Sherlock came back from the literal death for John, pretty gay if you ask me.

This show is very much not just about some guys being dudes solving crimes, they have relationship that’s deeper than friendship, and definitely not platonic. They deliberately wrote a sexually ambiguous Sherlock Holmes from the get-go - literally from the very first episode, then capitalized off of the targeted demographic, never a pay-off for their anticipation. Martin Freeman said in interviews that he could recognize Sherlock fans, them being generally women from 16 - 25. No shit Sherlock, this show targets them and capitalizes off of them, being quirky and gay as hell, of course the fanbase is generally 16 - 25 and female.

Sherlock queerbaited the fandom for years for the sake of marketing and there’s never a pay-off, nor was there any recognition to the community, and to add to all that bigotry, queercoding pretty much all of the villains? Why was a show aired in the 2010′s allowed to do this? Why did Mark Gatiss, an openly gay man, a writer of the show, allow this to happen? Why are millions of fans all over the world allowing all this to go on?!

6. Conclusion

Now I haven’t read the books yet, so I’m not at all qualified to criticize the adaptation quality of the TV series; I’m just talking about the TV series on its own. Despite my criticism, I think the first two seasons did quite okay. There are quite a few nice cases there, I like The Blind Banker and The Hound of Baskerville. They did those well because the focus was on the cases themselves, and the connection between John and Sherlock was only in the background. I, like many other fans, like to figure things out on my own, to read between the lines, and to not have things spelled out for me. With the next seasons bombarded with Sherlock and John bonding it seriously felt like mere fan service for me and even though I wasn’t there when the show was on, I still felt like I was robbed and my interest in the show was abused.

Sherlock is undoubtedly super influential in pop culture even now. It has to have done something right to be in that spot (capitalizing off loyal fans?). I’m not writing this rant to change someone’s mind about the series, by all means, I’m still gonna love the hell out of Gavin Lestrade, and absolutely lose my mind over Mary Watson. So do take my words with a grain of salt, I’m just disappointed that one of the most influential shows there is is just short of my expectations.

[tea-at-221]

The TJLC Debacle: 3 years out from S4 and counting; the copyright mini-theory; so much salt I’m bloated; but in the end, there is peace (I love you Johnlockers)

Ugh, don't even talk to me about Mary.

Don't even talk to me about the way Mofftiss have said they're sick of responding to fans on the subject of Johnlock. Of how they've said they're "not telling anyone else what to think or write about them" (as if they could stop us; as if they even own Sherlock themselves. Do keep reading, because this point becomes much more relevant and in-jokey later on). Don't even mention how they've bitched and whined incessantly because--god forbid--fans got *really really* into their show and emotionally invested.

They're so eager to discount all the beautiful little moments they wrote as accidents. And Arwel, who planted all those props, continually demonstrates that he's on their side (a not-very in-depth-analysis of his Instagram account and the way he interacted with fans towards the beginning of the pandemic showed as much, but I think maybe he’s grown a bit wiser and quieter since at least in terms of Johnlock and all things elephant-related. I don’t know for sure because I stopped looking.)

Anyway--they'd actually prefer for us to celebrate our own intelligence, is I suppose a charitable way of looking at it: our ability to make connections between things in the show; our metas on symbolism; our insightful fanfic; etc., and denounce them as the bad writers that they ultimately are.

More under the cut.

(This post may be of interest to you especially if you came to the fandom a bit later: multiple links to things of relevance/quotes/explanations appear both within and at the end of this entry.)

Because what makes a writer good?

Well, an ability to make people feel an emotional connection to their work, for one. I know this is just my own perspective, but if not for Johnlock, all my emotion about the show would evaporate. There wouldn't be much else there. Other people might get something, but I wouldn’t. Is some of the writing witty and entertaining regardless of any inferred/implied Johnlock? Yeah but, eh, a lot of shows have some good writing and I just don’t give a damn about them.

What makes a writer good?

Not making promises to the reader/viewer that they'll never keep. Plot holes, leading dialogue ("There’s stuff you wanted to say...but didn’t say it.” “Yeah”) never followed through on, puns that are apparently, I suppose, unintentional (e.g. "'Previous' commander?" "I meant 'ex'").

Uh, not writing continual gay jokes that aren't actually pointing toward the inference that people are making them because there's actually something going on there under the surface. (How about just don't make those jokes ever.)

Not being, apparently, oblivious (? questionable) to the queerbaiting they're engaging in *as they’re writing it.*

Acting like their LGBT audience is in the wrong/the bad guy, instead of choosing to remain respectful in the face of dissent. Instead it's just, "we never wrote it that way" / "We never played it that way."

A lot of those other mildly witty shows don’t actually blatantly drag their most passionate fans face-down through the mud the writers themselves created. Imagine that.

I'm not even a fan of Martin Freeman anymore, for the way he handled the whole thing (getting angry, the comments he made about how the fans made Sherlock “not fun anymore”...apparently Martin’s packing up his crayons and going home?)...no offense to anyone who is still a fan of his. I don’t make it a habit to drag him. I do to some degree understand his frustration with having the whole situation taken out on him--he’s just an actor in the show--but I simply wish he’d remained as cool and professional about it as Benedict Cumberbatch instead of pointing at the fans. You’re pointing in the wrong direction, mate.

What also irks me at the end of the day is this: the subsection of people who legitimately responded badly to the TJLC/S4 debacle and went above and beyond to harass the writers and actors/actresses on social media are *few and far between*, but we've been lumped in with them by what feels like...everyone, Martin included. TJLCers/Johnlockers (not the same group, but often treated as such) have been made to look like a bunch of rambunctious, immature, demanding children time and time and again in the wake of S4.

They'd rather, what, suggest John was so in love with Mary? THAT was the relationship they wanted to uphold in that show as so significant and...what, a demonstration of how honorable it is to respect your heterosexual relationship despite, you know...ANYTHING?

Yeah sorry, I don’t believe in that. John’s text-based affair, whether a disappointment for some as to his supposed character, was a very human reaction and I kinda sorta feel like I would have reacted MUCH more strongly than that had I been John. But nope. He stayed with Mary and was *ashamed* of his wandering eye. Ashamed that maybe he wanted to be admired by someone. I can’t think of a scene, off the top of my head, where Mary ever interacted with John without belittling him in some way--if not with words, then with consistently patronizing glances.

The message here is that heterosexuality is not just acceptable, but VALUABLE, however it manifests--but god forbid anyone see a queer subtext. (Why are lgbt+ writers some of the very WORST offenders where this is concerned? And they defend it! Is this childhood nostalgia/Stockholm Syndrome of the very fondest variety or what? Gay angst is all they got if they got anything at all, so it’s still good enough as far as “representation” goes?)

They really want to tell the story of John as so emotionally/mentally fucked up that he surrounds himself with unstable people time and again. They never give any reason *why* he might do that (which they could have done even soooo subtly), or delve into his past--just, apparently it's okay to assume that Sherlock's comment about "she's like that because you chose her" is exactly that.

No. Sherlock and Mary are NOT the same. Not...*remotely*!

Mary is underhanded and evil. She lies. She manipulates. She schemes. Her “love” is based on selfishness, and her assumption that John is a simpleton and hers to mold. She's in it for herself.

Sherlock hides. He prevaricates. He feels. He loves John. He does fucked up things in the name of love, but always for the benefit of those he loves. When he screws up, which he obviously does, it’s painful to us as the audience because we see that it is painful for him when he recognizes and regrets it.

I have never seen Mary regret anything. Those crocodile tears at Christmas? More manipulation. Inconsistent with anything else we were shown about her as a character.

To even think for a SECOND that people could ship Mary and John and mentally condemn John for cheating on Mary AFTER SHE SHOT HIS BEST FRIEND...as if marriage is the be-all-end-all free pass in which every sin must be forgiven until the end of time...as if John broke any covenant with his wife beyond those she broke from the very moment she walked into his life *with an entire fake past.* Is just. Well. It's asking us to accept gaslighting as healthy, loving, normal, *preferable* behavior, so...given the source that message is coming from, it's all a bit meta.

THAT. Is insanity. Maybe Mofftiss are the sociopaths.

How these men could write characters they themselves understand so little (or tell us they understand so little because their emotional maturity has yet to surpass that of the average three-year-old’s), I will never know. I can only imagine that they have absorbed, by osmosis over their lives, real and nuanced human behavior...then churned it back out again in their writing unaware, a bit like psychopaths who teach themselves what "normal" people do so that they can pass as psychologically sound in regular society.

Remember, we *are* talking about men who do these sorts of things:

Moffat says that Sherlock is celibate and that people who claim he's misogynistic when he does things like make Irene Adler imply she's attracted to the detective (even though she's a lesbian) are, ironically, "deeply offensive" (despite lines like "look at us both" in Battersea. We aren't your therapists, Moffat--we don't care what you meant, we care what you said, and what you *said* was clear. *Implying* it does not let you off the hook).

Gatiss has proclaimed that "I find flirting with the homoeroticism in Sherlock much more interesting" than the idea of ever making a show addressing LGBT issues. (That link is to a reddit forum, and I can't find the original interview anymore, but I assure you I had seen the actual article myself ages back and can't find it online again now along with some of the Martin quotes I wanted to link to. And nevermind what Gatiss has done with LGBT shows/issues since--my focus here is on what he has said, versus what he and Moffat have since claimed regarding their queerbaiting.)

Here’s a transcript of this screenshot:

"...many people come up and say they didn't realise." Despite this lack of public awareness, being part of the gay community is clearly important to Gatiss: "The older I get the more I want to give something back. I mean, I keep meaning to do something." When asked if he'd be interested in making a series about gay issues his response was enlightening:

"No, I don't think I'd make a kind of gay programme. It's much more interesting when it's not about a single issue. And equally, I find flirting with the homoeroticism in Sherlock much more interesting. Of course this reflects the grand picture of everyone's strange make-up; there are good gay people and bad gay people. I wouldn't like to make an issue film around the culture of being gay."

Instead Gatiss' interest seems to lie in making a drama where sexuality is, if not mundane, part of the wider framework: "I'd quite like to do something about a quite happy, ordinary gay person who's just incidentally gay. For example, a three-part thriller for ITV where the lead character just happens to be gay; when they finally go home, say 45 minutes in, and they had a same sex partner. That to me would be genuinely progressive. It wouldn't be a three-part gay thriller for ITV. It would be that this character just happened to be gay."

--End article quote.

And instead, who is canonically gay in the series? Well, Irene Adler. The innkeepers at the Cross Keys. And perhaps most notably, the *villains*, because that's a helpful trope: Moriarty and Eurus are, in S4, both implied to be at least bisexual.

Any character should be able to be any sexuality, this is true. But can we have some main characters, the good guys, give some good representation? Can't we start making that the standard, rather than the villains and the background characters? Because so far, that is the exception and not the rule.

Writers need to be aware of the damage they are perpetuating. We are not quite in a world yet where any character should be able to be any sexuality but isn't, yet we have no problem with saying the villain is LGBT+ or looks different/functions differently than much of the viewing audience.

"Male friendship is important and valid, not everything has to be gay"--this is a popular point with casual heterosexual viewers (and, to my chagrin, some of my LGBT+ friends) who don't fully grasp what "queerbaiting" is, often even when it's pointed out to them.

The lens of heterosexuality is real. My first time through watching BBC Sherlock, I didn't see the Johnlock at all. I had to look for it and read about it. When I saw it, the lens was lifted for me, and it changed my life and the way I view things forever (and for the best).

But back to my point about how little Mofftiss seem to understand their own story/most ardent fans, and then on to my other theory: in S4 it must be that they dropped their “psychopaths emulating empathy” act and indulged in their own "insane wish fulfillment" by doing away with all of the meaning, continuity, and sense. Right?

So, here’s the alternate theory. One which is not, please remember, in their defense.

Remember that S4 is what Mofftiss are *happy* to have us believe is what they'd do with these characters, given the chance to do whatever they wanted. I repeat, in Moffat’s own words: “Insane wish fulfillment.”

Okay I get it, this pasta has been over-salted.

Without further delay: MY COPYRIGHT RESEARCH THEORY THAT EVEN I DON'T PUT MUCH STOCK IN AND WHICH DOESN’T MAKE UP FOR THEIR CRUELTY EVEN IF TRUE

Part of me also raises an eyebrow at S4 as perhaps an example of the effect of the Conan Doyle estate on any modern production in the US. While it’s true that all of Sherlock is part of public domain in the UK and has been for quite a long time, Gatiss and Moffat still talk about it being partially under copyright. Specifically, the last 10 stories. I’m supposing that this means that because Sherlock airs internationally, or due to whatever contract the BBC has with the Doyle estate, they are still limited by the copyright as to what they can “publish”.

The Doyle estate is known for being a pain in the ass when it comes to abiding by copyright law as everyone else knows and practices it. They’ve tried to argue, for example (in 2013 and, much more recently, with the advent of Enola Holmes), that because Holmes and Watson were not fully developed as their final selves until the conclusion of all 10 stories still under copyright, then perhaps the characters themselves should still be protected, basically, in full.

It’s true that certain elements of the remaining stories are still under copyright here in the US (Watson had more than one wife--uh huh, we have that to look forward to, Johnlockers; the Garridebs moment is still under copyright--yeah, I’m getting to that too; and Sherlock didn’t care much for dogs til later so that’s not allowed either, fuck off Redbeard), but the estate’s problem in 2013 seemed to be based around a fear that *gasp* some day--if not right now!--anyone could write a Sherlock Holmes story in any way they pleased, changing the characters however they wished to and giving those characters “multiple personalities.”

See the following excerpt from the Estate’s case:

“...at any given point in their fictional lives, the two men's characters depend on the Ten Stories. It is impossible to split the characters into public domain versions and complete versions.”

(Click for full transcript.)

Obviously, by this point, that’s been done in multiple iterations. So I dunno. Their argument was *more* than muddy to begin with--they just grasp at straws to stay in control, it seems.

But okay. Backing up: wasn’t there sort-of a Garridebs moment in S4?!?? you cry. Yep. But imagine this: the Conan Doyle estate taking Mofftiss to court to argue that they depicted the Garridebs moment--a moment still under copyright--in The Final Problem.

Did they, though? Did they really?

The fandom cried out about the ridiculousness--the utter disappointment--of that moment when it was shown. It was not what we would have expected/wanted. We didn’t see John injured, Sherlock reacting with tender outrage to the good doctor’s attacker.

Instead we saw some ludicrous BS that was as bad as the clown with the sword-gun-umbrella. More of that.

I think Martin probably found that it was easy to produce real tears when he thought about how fucking terrible the S4 scripts were.

Ahem. Yet, this all seems very Mofftiss-flavored in terms of humor.

I can all-too-easily imagine them saying, “HA. We’re going to show some of these supposedly copyrighted things--and if they take us to court, they’ll be laughed out of the room.” Could that explain some of the overall S4 fuckery?

Sherlock wasn’t supposed to like dogs til later stories, as previously mentioned-- is that why Redbeard pulled a “Cinderella’s carriage” and transformed into a pumpkin (Victor Trevor)? Hmm. Sigh.

It...doesn’t actually appear that the estate has any qualms about taking laughable stuff to court, I mean...*shrug.* They have the money to do it, and money is the name of the game, because you’ve got to pay for rights (cha-ching sounds).

Yep, it does seem that the estate is open to the copyrighted materials being made reality, but who knows for what price or with what caveats. The BBC isn’t, so far as I’ve ever heard, known for throwing money around. Early Doctor Who would be so much less entertaining if they’d had any sort of budget. (And in fact, more of the older episodes would exist, but apparently the BBC--in part to cut costs--reused some of their tapes.)

My bottom-line bitter is this: Mofftiss do like to amuse themselves. To please themselves and no one else, as they’ve shown time and again. Sure, they could do whatever they wanted with S4...and they did...but they were also cruel about it, and that’s what I’ll never forgive them--OR the BBC--for.

A lot of fans gave up after series 4. I was very nearly one of them. I was angry, like just about every other Johnlocker and/or TJLCer, but I was really truly heartbroken. I couldn’t look at fanfiction. My days were full of bitterness and I keenly felt the lack of the fandom outlet that had become so essential to my mental well-being. I didn't know how to overcome the disparity between TJLC and what the show actually was. I didn't know how to separate the things I loved so much from the shitty writers and the way the BBC handled things with their whole response letter (that atrocious, childish blanket response they sent to everyone who complained about S4, not just the Johnlockers/TJLCers. Related to your complaint or not, if you filed one post-S4, this was the response you got). I still boycott BBC shows/merchandise, just by the way.

I tried to link to the blanket response letter but the link didn’t want to work (it’s an old reddit post; I had difficulty finding a copy of the letter elsewhere though at one point it wasn’t so hard...Google is weird these days y’all...tell me it’s not just me) so here’s a screenshot:

Transcript:

“Thank you for contacting us about “Sherlock”.

The BBC and Hartswood Films have received feedback from some viewers who were disappointed there was not a romantic resolution to the relationship between Sherlcok and John in the finale of the latest season of “Sherlock”.

We are aware that the majority of this feedback uses the same text posted on websites and circulated on social media.

Through four series and thirteen episodes, Sherlock and John have never shown any romantic or sexual interest in each other. Furthermore, whenever the creators of “Sherlock” have been asked by fans if the relationship might develop in that direction, they have always made it clear that it would not.

Sherlock’s writers, cast and producers have long been firm and vocal supporters of LGBT rights.

The BBC does not accept the allegations leveled at “Sherlock” or its writers, and we wholeheartedly support the creative freedom of the writers to develop the story as they see fit.

We will of course register your disappointment.

Thank you for contacting us.

Kind Regards,

BBC Complaints Team

So how about that? *Did* they “register our disappointment”? We can actually check that. The BBC’s website has a monthly summary of complaints received. So what did they receive in January 2017, the month S4 aired?

Huh, what do you know. Sounds like that blanket response was exactly the “fuck you” it came across as.

But the show--the FANDOM--had filled a need in my life, and so I had to own that and make it mine, or just...let something in me die: something that felt like an actual vital organ. I had to decide that these characters mean something to me beyond what anyone else tells me they should. I had to accept my own perceptions as truth, as I do with everything else in my life. I had to overcome the idea of canon as law (BBC Sherlock isn't canon anyway; ACD is canon. BBC Sherlock is, in the end, badly written fanfiction--or--worse?--decent pre-slash fanfiction distorted by consistent lies and the hazing of the LGBT audience, topped with the dumpster fire of S4′s incoherent nonsense).

I had to take the good and throw away the bad, just like anyone else who chose to stay. The good bits of the show...dialogue, yes. Plot points, yes. These awful writers did write some good stuff sometimes.

They just broke all the unspoken rules of what not to do to your audience. And then did and said everything they could not to apologize, and to justify their own failings. Which, in the years since I began shipping queer ships beyond any others, I have unfortunately experienced more than once.

So, my vulnerability has been yeeted into the vacuum of broke-my-trustdom: no one can tell me what things should mean to me. I will decide.

I decide that all of the FUCKING AMAZING writing in the Sherlock fandom is a staple in my life that makes it worth living. And that that's okay. And takes precedence over anything the writers or anyone else associated with the show could ever say or do.

Johnlock can not be taken away. It doesn't belong to them. It never did, even if they brought us to it. It belongs to us. To the group of amazingly creative, brainy, empathetic, resourceful, vibrant, resilient people who make up this fandom.

So thank YOU, all of YOU, for giving me Sherlock, Johnlock, and TJLC.

I am SO SAD for those who never found a way to make peace with this fandom again. Let me just say that I understand that inability entirely.

I am fortunate that I found the ability in myself to cling to the joy (something it has taken my whole life to be able to do). I hope others will who haven’t yet but wish they could.

Let Mofftiss and whoever sides with them stay angry and bitter and vicious, always looking over their shoulders for anyone who dares to whisper about subtext.

I’m proud to be part of what they’re whispering so angrily about.

Thanks for sticking it out if you made it this far. I know this was very self-indulgent and rambly.

Articles of interest:

A Study in Queerbaiting (Or How Sherlock Got it All Wrong) by Marty Greyson

“We never played it like that.” - Martin on Johnlock

Henry Cavill on the Enola Holmes lawsuit

More on that--and by the way Sherlock isn’t allowed to like dogs

The way Sherlock creators told fans Sherlock & John aren’t gay is so rude

Especially for those new to the fandom who may not know the distinction between TJLC and Johnlockers and want to know more about TJLC's evolution/what it is/meta through the years

Moffat's view on asexuality, offensive to me in particular *as* an asexual person (same article where he claims he isn't misogynistic): "If he was asexual, there would be no tension in that, no fun in that – it's someone who abstains who's interesting."

Yet he says Sherlock isn't gay or straight and that he's trying to keep his brain pure which is a "very Victorian attitude"

(Nice historical research there, Moff--actually the Victorians were sex-positive).

Sherlock fans were robbed of the gay ending they deserved

Benedict Cumberbatch has lashed out at his Sherlock co-star Martin Freeman over his negative attitude towards fans

BBC complaints January 2017

Martin Freeman: 'Sherlock is gayest story ever'

From 2016: UNPOPULAR OPINION: "Sherlock" Isn't Sexist or Queerbaiting; It's Actually Trying to Stage a Revolution

Queer-baiting on the BBC's Sherlock: Addressing the Invalidation of Queer Identities through Online Fan Fiction Communities by Cassidy Sheehan

[punkscowardschampions]

Jude & Jac

Jude: [sends her the snaps as if she hasn't seen that the fuckboy posted them like obvs she has seen them if you have gal but okay] Jude: ?! Jac: yeah Jac: bit rude he didn't tag us, I guess Jude: he never tags anyone Jude: idk if he knows how Jac: I'm sure I'll still get the ❤s Jude: & the dms Jac: alls well that ends well then Jude: at least your night didn't end in 🚔👮🚨 Jac: the joys of being of age Jac: what party got shutdown then Jude: Amelia's Jude: 🏡👀👵 Jac: No shit Jac: it's like throwing a party in a nursing home Jude: 🤣 it was decent before then though Jude: I'd give it an 8 Jac: @ her Jac: you know how to do them Jude: she ain't gonna take it on board when she's losing points for not enough straight boys Jude: just take it as a 🥇🏆 Jac: what do you expect Jude: 0 expectations Jac: yeah, that's something to shout about Jude: like you've got a leg to stand on there but alright Jac: ?! Jude: you were always going on at me about my rep before & you're not even bothered about yours now Jac: how do you know I'm not bothered Jude: ⬆ Jac: I'm not bothered about talking to you about Amelia's party Jac: that has no interest for me Jude: I only mentioned my 🏃 & my rating Jac: why? Jac: I didn't ask Jude: obvs you're 🤐 Jude: why would I wait for you to ask Jac: heaven forbid we aren't subjected to a never-ending stream of consciousness Jude: my bad for checking in, like Jude: 🙄 Jac: where, where'd you do that Jude: ⬆ Jac: you mean when you talk about yourself again, yeah, cool Jac: where would I be without that kind of care Jude: oh come on Jude: you don't have to @ me if there's owt you wanna say Jac: and clearly there isn't Jac: so don't bother rolling your eyes, you came into my inbox Jac: so you say what you want to say then piss off Jude: what are you so fuming for? Jac: Jesus, you're self-absorbed Jac: why the fuck do you think Jude: I 🤔💭 you know what he's like Jac: blame me then, that's a hot take Jude: nah, you don't do anything without your own 🥇💡 for every way it can play out Jac: and what possible reason would I have for doing this Jude: idk Jac: sherlock you ain't Jude: never said I was Jude: you're the 🧠 Jac: then you're chatting shit Jude: I can be the 🥊 if you want & you are bothered by the shit everyone's gonna chat Jac: I can handle it Jude: alright Jac: people are just jealous Jac: he's the hottest boy still at our school Jude: yeah, that's undeniable Jac: they judge but they all would if they could Jude: no shit Jude: how he gets away with being too thick to @ Jac: not as if I was there to do homework Jude: he has people he 💰 is what I heard Jude: for the homework bit Jac: yeah he's loaded Jac: might go out with him for the presents Jude: like I said 🥇💡 Jac: obviously Jude: I got asked out last night an' all but it was a no Jac: there were some straight boys that weren't our brother then Jac: interesting Jude: mates of mine Jude: or so I 🤔💭 Jac: that's all boys want Jude: it's whatever, I can handle it Jac: sure Jude: ? or ! Jac: . Jac: ... if you really wanna get a sense of my disbelief Jude: 👌 Jac: Cool, you can tell Jesse he's a traitor too Jude: he's not here Jude: hang on 📢🗨 Jude: probs helping her 🧼🧽🧹🗑 before her mum & dad get back Jac: Tragic Jude: bit weird that they're best mates now Jude: she 👻 us for ages after you fell out Jac: it's not weird, just sad, as aforementioned Jude: she loves his new 🎵 that'll do him Jude: 💃 to whatever the 💊 she was on though Jac: if you have to buy your fans with 🧼🧽🧹🗑 you can't be any good Jude: 🤣 Jac: 🙄 Jude: maybe he just can't get his head through her door Jac: yes, playing a party for free is really impressive Jac: especially when the host has no friends Jude: 💔 you're not 📢🗨 to him Jude: be a decent ego check, that Jac: I have no desire to talk to him either Jude: I know Jude: called him a traitor & then dragged him Jac: I'm glad that's clear Jude: 💎 Jac: then I won't have to hit him again Jude: & none of us will have to put up with him 😭 Jude: tah for that Jac: hardly my fault he's a pussy Jude: not getting the 🎻 out Jac: makes a change Jude: he had a go at me for being there Jude: such a dickhead Jac: wants his new best friend to himself Jac: has no one told him she's actually gay Jude: he'd have to be thicker than your new bf not to work it out Jac: probably thinks everyone puts it on like he does Jude: she's never got with a lad has she? Jac: I don't know Jude: it's what everyone says but loads of what they 🗨 is bollocks Jac: makes no odds to the fact everyone will be saying that he clearly fancies her Jude: yeah Jude: do you reckon he does? Jac: why else would he do that for her Jude: she's got no mates, might just reckon she needs one Jac: sure Jude: like when you took Savannah in Jac: not really Jac: she had friends Jude: not proper ones Jac: still, she weren't begging for friends Jac: or approaching the kind of pathetic Amelia is these days Jude: I guess Jac: there's no question Jude: she did seem really 💔😭🎻 Jude: I'd be well chuffed if mum & dad pissed off for the weekend Jac: you know they're weirdly close Jude: I bet her mum has shut down loads of parties she's 👀👂 in everyone's business Jude: bit of karma there or whatever Jac: surprising they've gone away Jac: she's clearly miserable with her life Jude: her house is wild Jude: I'd never been before Jac: if wild meant insanely boring, yeah, sure Jude: nursing home is right Jude: that's what I meant Jac: I know Jude: my mates who don't have 🐶🐱 live in 🏠 that look like they belong on the telly Jude: not that Jac: like I said, her mum has no life Jac: when she's not got her nose in everyone's business, she's making ugly shit for their house Jude: making it? Jude: 🥉 Jac: pinterest Jac: hope Jesse knows the future he's signing up for Jude: not 🤘🎸😎🏆 Jac: 🔪👀 🤯🔫 more like Jude: *🤪👵 Jac: if you think her mum is miserable, imagine how her dad feels Jac: is my point Jude: god yeah Jude: 💀 Jac: no wonder she's dating girls Jude: I wonder if she is going out with anyone Jac: why would you care Jude: if Jess does Jude: he's a dickhead but I don't want him to be 💔 Jac: 🙄 Jude: is dad down there with you? Jac: no clue Jude: is his 🚪🔐? Jac: they never forget now they're obsessed with trying to imprison me Jude: ugh Jac: still, I'm going out Jude: let me out with you, I g2g & mum's being aggro about it Jac: why would I Jude: why not? Jac: because I have no reason to help you Jude: 🤔💭 of a reason then Jude: I'll do it if you help me Jac: there's nothing you could offer me, thanks Jude: come on Jac: why do you think they're any more likely to let me out Jude: cos they do Jude: you're officially off the rails Jac: no, the difference is, I don't care if they say I can or not Jac: that's your problem that you do Jude: I still have things I care about that they can take off me Jac: sucks to be you then Jude: cheers Jude: top quality sisterly advice Jac: I don't care about you Jude: I got that cos you keep saying it over & over Jac: Why are you still here Jude: what else am I gonna do? homework? Jude: not allowed to go nowhere Jac: might be an idea Jude: 💩💡 Jac: you'll live Jude: 🤏 Jac: you're all so pathetic Jude: it's you acting so hard done by Jac: yeah Jac: how'd you work that one out, genius Jude: the whinging happening Jude: just mute me like you have irl Jac: I'm not the one begging to go out Jac: but sure Jude: I asked, once, but alright Jac: and now you're moaning about having to do homework, which you won't do anyway Jac: and this whole time have been talking about things I don't care about ad nausea Jac: but you're SO right Jude: nah, I answered that I'd rather stay here 🗨 than do it since you asked Jac: you're boring, Jude Jude: you can't be bothered to chuck out a decent insult, nowt to do with me Jac: it's just the truth Jac: you wish there was anything more colourful to call you Jac: you just are Jude: you wish I was 💔😭 like Jess when you start on him Jac: if you get it, like you say, then you'd realise I literally don't think about you at all Jude: I get that you want me to piss off rn, it ain't happening Jac: I want you to piss off, that's about your lot Jac: so have at it Jude: yeah yeah Jude: just said that myself Jac: then do it Jude: what you gonna do 🥊 me? Jac: don't start or you'll find out Jude: you start everything Jac: so? Jude: so 🥊 me Jude: idc about that Jude: I'll smack you back Jac: then I'll fucking kill you Jac: leave me alone, I have nothing to say to you, I don't want to hear anything from you Jac: it's as simple as that Jude: but why? Jude: you've never said Jac: I don't like you Jude: it's more than that Jac: What could be more than that Jude: you didn't like me before, we still 🗨 Jac: and what was the point Jude: you're my sister Jac: and Jude: and you used to be bothered about it Jac: not now Jude: what happened? Jac: I got bored of you Jude: alright Jac: great Jude: [no reply I can really give so I'll just leave that there lol]

[belovedalittlemore]

CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE FIRST AVENGER (2011) DIR. JOE JOHNSTON

june 13, 2020

topics i’m covering

movie itself

steve’s main relationships

steve + peggy (also w/ endgame!)

steve + bucky

agent carter + why she deserves more

marvel as an entity for entertainment, not the advancement of the industry

black panther at the oscars, and why it didn’t deserve to be there

the movie:

ok it’s not that bad, i definitely expected it to be worse. i didn’t really like the yellow ass color grading, like i felt like i needed to tell the movie “you can communicate 1930s without needing to make yourselves yellow”. i think my biggest two issues were the plot and natalie dormer’s character. starting with the plot, this movie was so jampacked with so many challenges i felt like i was watching 3 episodes of a tv show crammed into one. we started with the formation of steve rogers, then the rescue mission, then getting dr. zola (who played the villain in a sherlock episode and freaked me the FUCK out and now i can never look at him the same way), then killing schmidt (which didn’t even work because he ended up in iw + endgame??), then steve dying but then him not dying and waking up? there was just SO MUCH in so little time. second, what the FUCK was natalie’s character for. i love her but she was SO unnecessary. she simply served to add tension to steve and peggy’s relationship, which really only put them back like five minutes. that was never even cleared up, peggy just shot his shield and they kissed like 30 minutes later and everything was dandy.

steve and peggy:

god they’re so FUCKING CUTE and all they really care about is their country and finding the right person and i just watched the ending to endgame (a year later) and guess what? i STILL cannot handle it. thinking about how steve lived a whole life in the present but then also the 1930s but also not BAFFLES me and i don’t think about it but god that ending BROKE ME. i couldn’t listen to that song for a month without CRYING. in short, i probably will never watch endgame again.

also when i first watched it, i was BROKEN because that was a whole phase of my life; that was a DECADE of everyone’s life and it was over and it really hit me at the CREDITS. i was sobbing at the credits and thinking about how we’re never going to see steve or tony again.

anyway, back to peggy. honestly, one of the cutest, most solid relationships in the mcu. i just know that they never fight over anything and their favorite thing to do is dance and i imagine that steve makes her blush but not as much as she makes him blush and i just KNOW that steve would’ve been a huge part of the civil rights movement.

steve and bucky:

ok i’ve always heard about steve and bucky’s ~relationship~ and how they should’ve been gay but after finally watching the captain america trilogy, my only thought is REALLY???

like yeah, they’re great friends and all, and both of them are devastatingly attractive, and they love each other, but not romantically

honestly i feel like this ship really came about because in the other two movies, steve’s accepted that he’s never going to be with peggy, so the closest thing he can have from his old life is bucky and steve sees in bucky everything he ever wanted. and so, of course the audience loses sight of peggy as well and is like “stucky uwu”. but NO. peggy’s the greatest woman who ever lived and the better half of steve rogers and she DEF would’ve been able to lift mjolnir.

hot take: girls only wanted stucky to happen because they’ve never seen a real, wholesome, supportive male friendship in their lives because boys are too stuck inside their toxic masculinity bubbles to demonstrate true love for each other and so girls see stucky and think that they’re in love but really they’re just a great example of male friendship that no one sees anymore

agent peggy carter + why she deserves the world:

she’s so incredibly headstrong and marvelous and is so accountable for herself and calm and cool and collected and lovely in all of the best ways. i know she got a tv series (that lasted 2 seasons), but i feel like she should’ve gotten her own movie. she’s a great push for feminism, we would’ve gotten more steve content (maybe?), and who doesn’t love the 30s.

i just feel like the black widow movie doesn’t matter since she’s DEAD. like i don’t need to go back in time to see her origin story.

movie studios should’ve made pushes for female movies when obviously APPROPRIATE.

peggy carter? should’ve gotten her own movie after this one

black widow? needed the solo movie right before or after the first avengers; would’ve been great!

but now? it’s just unnecessary

marvel:

ever since we did our ranking, i’ve been thinking about marvel as a business and its role in the entertainment industry. the last time i watched thor: ragnarok, i remember thinking that it was a great movie, which it is(!), but it wasn’t the best. and after our ranking, i realized, it really is the best.

i guess i’m disappointed that marvel is really an entity for the blockbuster industry, and not at all for the advancement of the movie industry. i wish directors would be more creative and imaginative; take taika waititi, who took the least-liked set of movies and made it AMAZING. i feel like marvel needs to stop JUST using the russo brothers or that feige guy, whatever his name is, and try reaching out to new directors to incite creativity.

i was looking at a letterboxd list which had every mcu movie with the new releases and there’s going to be about FORTY (total) of them in the next four years, series and/or movie. at some point, we will get bored of the same formula OVER and OVER again.

look at james bond: no one really took them seriously until daniel craig, who (and of course, the abundant group of masterful moviemakers behind him) practically breathed new life and made them something to look forward to. the bond movies used to be a blockbuster, money-making venture, and now it’s taken seriously. i hope marvel does this soon, because in a couple years, their fanbase will become the diehard marvel comic-reading fans and the people who are too sucked in to let go.

black panther, and why it just doesn’t work:

don’t get me wrong, LOVED black panther. such a bold, great movie to finally(!!!) introduce black people into the mcu and done so well. HOWEVER, the movie itself fell a little flat. the whole villain plot? so eh. i thought klaue was way more interesting than killmonger, and they really just brushed him aside within five minutes.

it’s kind of like cmbyn in the fact that their visuals and sheer presence outshine EVERYTHING ELSE, especially in the first watch.

also, it got NOMINATED FOR BEST PICTURE. i totally understand the other awards it won (best soundtrack, costume design i think, and one other one) and that’s so amazing that marvel finally broke out of its blockbuster mold into the INDUSTRY

however, it got nominated for BEST PICTURE which is so WHAT THE FUCK (ok i’ll let the nom slide though, the 2019 picks were lowkey hella bad and this was the year that GREEN BOOK won)

if ANY marvel movie should’ve ever been nominated and/or won, i think it’s thor: ragnarok or iw; black panther just seemed like such a “look! we’re diverse, can’t you see?” type of move and i was NOT a fan

[migleefulmoments]

Oh my God. So now people in Hollywood are threatening Darren and Chris's families if they don't comply? Tinhats are saying they wouldn't be surprised if someone died in a freak accident to put Darren and Chris in line. How long before they bring up Chris's mom and start getting suspicious?

Anonymous said: Damn it’s real dramatic over in CCLand today. Abby’s “anons” are talking about how someone must have threatened to kill Darren or Chris’s family if Darren didn’t get married. And then we have Abby saying that no matter what happens she won’t abandon them. Yeah, she is definitely setting the stage for claiming someone threatened to kill Chris if Darren didn’t have a baby with Mia. She knows a baby is coming eventually and she can’t let go of her CCThrone.

It’s da Mafia, my friends! 

They are so full of themselves-and so dramatic- it’s terrifying. 

I keep saying that Abby is writing a Telenovela and damn does she love the drama. She’s also desperate to keep her storyline going and there just isn’t a logical reason WHY Darren would be in the closet and married to Mia at this point unless you go for “big threats”. Abby has suggested this vague“threat” theory before but nobody else picked it up so we never had such scary-hilarious promises of allegiance to Criss and Colfer. This is exactly the kind of pithy, over-the-top emotional digging into a cause that social media was made for- the kind in which you have no actual impact but you blog the hell out it like you matter.  

One of the biggest issues with the CrissColfer storyline is why should we be sympathetic to ccDarren and/or ccChris? They are both successful, famous, wealthy, powerful men. Abby’s never-ending criticisms of ccDarren are becoming a problem. While she always blames it on “his team”, most people don’t find it so obviously his team’s fault as evidenced by her Nonnies who then get a lecture on HOW it IS his team’s fault. Of course, nobody is controlled by their employees and ccDarren and ccChris aren’t victims or children. 

Abby delights when she can claim that ccDarren is treating Mia abhorrently because it fulfills her hatred of Mia but nobody else feels so delighted. For instance, she claimed he was trying to pull her in the water during a New Year’s Eve embrace. 

I’m guessing, and we are missing the moment inbetween d goes to dip her so she things she’s getting her kiss but in fact tries to throw her in the water.(X)

The sane among us are disgusted by a claim that he would try to drown his wife. The same goes for ccChris when he publically bullies and shames Mia on social media and his books. Abby’s love of hating Mia often overshadows her need to keep ccChris and ccDarren as victims. 

The basis of CrissColfer is that both men want to be famous and work in Hollywood for the big money and they can’t tell their truth without fear of losing everything. After ten years, both men are no longer the “inexperienced, naive, innocent young men who made bad choices when fame was flashed in their faces” and Abby needs a new spin in order to keep her followers emotionally invested. Throw in a storyline where both men are just trying to stay afloat after their families were threatened and WHOA man, you have two very compelling characters with sympathy through the roof.

Anonymous asked: Let's not forget that with the wedding being the lesser of two evils, one of the threats could have gone far beyond you or C would never be working in this industry again, like you said, the people in power will do anything to hide their sins and there really is no limit, who knows a threat on his (or C's or other family) live could have been made. It sure as hell wouldn't be the first time someone dies in a freak accident because they have dirt on someone (Chris already lost his mom in a freak accident. I can’t imagine he would ruin his entire life over the fear of losing someone else when he understands that life is precious and you can’t control what happens to family members. Or the other argument is why would he allow someone to control his life when the easy solution is to go off to NYC and become an author.  Leave Hollywood behind for the man he loves and living an authentic life. It doesn’t seem like that hard of a tradeoff to me)

ajw720 answered: Nonnie. I’m really starting to question. And m has her family and SS on her side. That’s a lot of power and ruthlessness. (I'm always fascinated by the power that Abby imagines Mia’s family has. If Chris and Darren are powerless then why is the head of Vera Wang’s company so powerful? Mia’s dad owned a small chain of small music venues. He’s likely loaded but not in the BIG powerful world of movers and shakers. As for Sunshine Sachs- they are very powerful and healthy but there is little incentive for them to risk it all by getting involved in little unknown Darren’s love life by closeting him).    

I’ve decided. No matter what they throw at us, while i may not be able to watch as closely, I’m not abandoning them unless there comes a point I think it’s willing. I don’t see that happening. What is happening is not about straight. (What “they throw at us”? This isn’t about you, Abby. Nothing about CC is about you. You’re just a lonely, unstable fan sitting in her living room all alone obsessing about Mia and fabricating outrageous stories about a family you don’t know and a man who doesn’t care about you. I’m curious, what would convince you that he’s willing? You already said you wouldn’t believe him if he told you he loved Mia.  You’re destinated to come out the loser because you refuse to see or accept reality.)    

It’s about hiding sins. If it were just straight as I have repeatedly said it would be done better and with someone that actually makes d look good. (So she’s twisting the story to be about hiding sins.  I’m not sure how forcing the farce to continue is a good strategy to ensure you don’ get caught. It seems like a cut and run strategy is better- preferably with big payoffs. Lots of us DO think Darren does look good. It’s only the people obsessed that he’s gay who don’t like him).

I just hope they have finally aligned with the right people to help them (How would this work? Either Ryan and Sunshine are terrified of their role coming out, all-powerful and threatening his family to keep it quiet OR there are people to align with who can help but not both because people who threaten others' lives for their own interests aren’t going to show up at the negotiation table willing to work out and deal).

flowersintheattic254. @ajw720 I’ll state publicly that I’m with you on that. I’m not going away unless I see it’s willing. Right now it doesn’t seem to be and frankly the more I learn about Holly/wood and how people are manipulated and abused the more I think it isn’t a choice or a very unwilling one. (Why would Darren and Chris stay there if it is that bad?  If Hollywood is one big cesspool then reasonable people would get the hell out of dodge, do something because living in that environment will turn you into that kind of person.  Also, I just have to add that the Catholic Church has an abysmal record on sex abuse of women and children so if anyplace is manipulative and abusive, it’s Abby’s church)

leka-1998 Totally agreed.

I feel like every day I get more repulsed by what the people in that awful industry are capable of.

notes-from-nowhere If it is possible, the more I know, the more I feel compelled to stand up against this habits and fight back. (How exactly will you do that? I’m fascinated and can’t wait to hear)

Nothing will change overnight. Not D’s life, not the ones of the others in his same situation but we can do something. And as much as we could, I’m sure, we will. (No shit sherlock, you’re 10 years  inand no end in sight)

I will accept defeat the day D will show me, without a doubt, that this is what he wants for his life and not matter if right or wrong, I will respect his choice. To date, I don’t think we are even close to that. Time will tell. (Again, what can Darren do to prove to you? He married the woman he’s dated for 8 years, he opened a business with her, he gushed about the wedding, and he travels with her everywhere. When he tells you how he feels about her you all instantly dismiss his words as being contracted or “Mia wrote them”.  You refuse to SEE what is so plain in front of you. I cannot imagine what he could do that would convince you.)  

In the meantime I will keep doing what I do now. (which is lie, twist facts, post Glee photos as CrissColfer, make stupid comparisons, and blow some up Abby’s ass).   

Anonymous asked: I agree about HW and who knows what kind of nefarious shit goes on. The problem I have is his parents not intervening in this . I get there is probably blackmail at this point but surely his parents can see this can’t go on. I’m afraid it’s affecting his family at this point and I would think his dad would take the reigns at some point and say enough. This is the only thing that tells me it’s short term and there is an escape date. I don’t see his parents accepting something permanent.

Do they have a choice though nonnie? That’s the question. How are they more powerful then the heavy weights he’s up against? What has been threatened? I have an idea of where I think this is going but I don’t know and I’m firm there’s 2 distinct paths, one is freedom. The other is too horrifying for words. And I think by the end of the year we will know. (She is sure they will be divorcing after the anniversary and Hollywood airs.) 

Because no doubt this has gravely hurt d and his spirit. And between c and his parents, i’d think they are doing everything to help him win. All parties on his side have to be petrified. Because even if there’s a positive plan in place, what’s to stop it from changing? Because I reiterate. D was going to come out tied to ACS and it went nightmarishly wrong. And he’s well being and safety are at stake for as long as she is tied to him. (She reiterates God Damnit! She KNOWS she was right!!!!!!! WTAF? No, he wasn’t going to come out. He’s told you he’s straight and there is no reason to suspect he’s lying. I love the comments about his safety as long as Mia is around or his image as long as his team is around-He’s fucking thriving. When is the shit going to hit the fan? He won the top four awards, has his own show on a new platform, has a big Broadway show coming, has a Ryan Murphy Netflix show that he helped co-create, Elsie is amazing, StarKid had a very successful year, his wedding is all over the “top celeb weddings” lists, he was busy AF this year and he just bought a $3 million house. It’s been a decade-when will this bad stuff start? ). 

Anonymous asked: I do fear D is in this for the long haul unfortunately. It has slowed down for her a bit post-nuptials but unless this show with RM is serving as an out, I don’t see how D will ever get out of this. We also need to remember she knows too much too at this point. It’s not that easy to get someone with the amount of info she has to just go away. If she’s intent on riding coattails, there may be little D can do to get rid of her. I hope I’m wrong. I want to see him win. But it doesn’t look good. (What does ccMia know that she can use against him? That would mean he’s done something wrong but according to cc lexicon, it’s all done against him, he’s the victim. If anything he would have dirt on her to use) 

I can’t believe how naive I was to think it was as simple as d&c saying no. I doubt that was ever an option and they learned that, after months of fighting post encagement, in the cruelest manner. Honestly I’m feeling almost more heartbroken today then on feb 16 because I’m finally seeing the horrifying reality of HW.Nonnie. Despite the fact that I don’t trust him, I’m praying that RM saw that it serves his agenda and reputation to help d as it would rehabilitate his character much more than to continue to hurt him, because at this point I think he’s the only person that has the power to get him out. Now we wait and see. (I don’t see how Ryan Murphy can serve as both Mafia boss and his savior but I understand that he’s the only one that could possibly play that role right now. There are no other gay Yoda’s in Darren’s life with enough cloud to be the “savior” so by process of elimination, Ryan is the one). .   ’t see how Ryan Murphy can serve as both Mafia boss and his savior but I understand that he’s the only one that could possibly play that role right now. There are no other gay Yoda’s in Darren’s life with enough cloud to be the “savior” so by process of elimination, Ryan is the one).    

I can’t believe how naive I was to think it was as simple as d&c saying no. I doubt that was ever an option and they learned that, after months of fighting post encagement, in the cruelest manner. Honestly I’m feeling almost more heartbroken today then on feb 16 because I’m finally seeing the horrifying reality of HW. (So basically, the original cc storyline isn’t holding up anymore after the end dates passed for coming out- Glee ended, the 8-year contract expired, Hedwig ended, ACS started, filmed and ended, Awards season came to a finish and now you’re hoping the anniversary is the lucky date.  But you need to explain why Darren and Chris have so much power and still are not together so you’re going for something bigger and more sinister.  The problem is that while Hollywood has a seedy underbelly, you can’t take one person’s story and extrapolates it to everyone. Judy Garland may have been drugged but they didn’t know the effect of drugs back then like we do know and the military gives the pilots “go” and “no go” pills to help them perform to this day under close medical supervision)  

[i-can-get-extra-with-my-ships]

A Slice Of My Love. Chapter 6. Wait, You Don't Think I'm Insane?

Sup children!! (No clementine my brother did not hack onto my Tumblr and write me a whole fucken chapter.) We be existing on the bean bag again. 

The farthest you will most likely see me venture is to my bed. Or a hotel. It depends how long this book goes for. I mean, we’re almost at 10 chapters. I said like 20-30 most likely. Holy shit. I’m almost ½ to ⅓ done with this book. Moving on before I go on more of a tangent than I already have!!

Pairings: Mentions of the glasses gays (it's toned down for this chapter and in chapter 7 it will be turned up to 11), Prinxiety but it’s best friend mode™ that has been preset to 11

Tw: Cursing, Fourth wall breaks (they be back, but not as bad this time), Virgil being insane, Virgil and Roman being both shippers and BFFs, the lack of sleep finally catching up to Virge, Vee thinking he has just proved a major point.

Virgil’s POV

----

Assuming that you’ve read this whole book, you already know that Pat has been overtaken by the powers of the boop™ and has gone upstairs with Logan. Logan never came back downstairs.

Roman was thinking about something. Well, I knew what that something was. You only have to be best friends with Princy for a year and a half to know what he wants to ask you.

“You wanna ask me about Alonso, don’t you?” Roman looked up at me. Then he went back to thinking.

“You know that as long as you don’t accuse me of being insane, you can ask me whatever the fuck you want.”

He looked at me again and then sat down at the table with a bowl of cereal. “Taking advantage of the fact that dad’s upstairs huh?”

The fuck? Dude, we’ve been best fucking friends for over a year now!! If you’re trying to ask me something just ask me!!

“No shit Sherlock.”

He gasped in fake surprise. “How DARE you!! I hate to inform you, but I am the prince, hence I am royalty. You do not speak to royalty in such a crude manner!!”

So the Roman stans are taking mild offense right now. I’m gonna tell you this once and once only. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN BEST FRIEND MODE™ HAS BEEN TURNED UP TO ITS PRESET NUMBER OF 11!!

Anyways, Roman stans aside, I laughed hysterically at Roman’s mocked offense. He does a really good impression of what I’d like to imagine offended Roman stans to sound like.

Ok, we’re gonna chuck the Roman stans out a window so I can actually move on from them. I decided that I was going to help Princey away from the conversation that He was trying to move away from. (I was really tempted to say spared.) The extra bitch hasn’t left yet, has it Em? (We are NOT doing this now.) Fine.

“Seeing as you’re trying to change the subject, Pat and Lo earlier.”

His face lit up at the mention of the glasses gays, as we’ve dubbed them.

“Looks like someone needs to get more sleep.” Ro did a crappy impersonation of Lo. I laughed some more.

“And don’t forget the boop™”

Roman started snickering “How did I forget the boop™? Uhh… Well, I only have 2 weaknesses: self-deprecation and affection.”

Roman was crappily imitating Pat now. I knew where Roman was going. I jumped up from my chair and ran over. Then I slowly walked by him and booped his nose.

Roman snickers turned into a bit of giggling, then he continued with our inside joke. “Never mind. I have 3 weaknesses: self-deprecation, affection and whatever Logan just did.”

I laughed even more at Roman’s shitty impression job. “Ok, you’re purposely sucking. I have accepted this challenge of sucking at doing impersonations for this joke.” I cleared my throat for the shittiest Logan Sanders impression in the history of the universe. I heard Roman mumble “Oh god” underneath his breath.

Good. You better be bracing yourself for this shitshow Princey.

“Patton, I believe that Roman and Virgil would call that a” I searched through imaginary vocab cards “boop™.”

We looked at each other and then laughed hysterically. I somehow ended up falling over in our laughter. We stopped for a moment and looked at each other again. Then laughed again, only harder this time.

Through my laughter, I managed “Stop laughing and help me you, stupid bitch!!”

He looked at me in disbelief. “You’re sitting there, on the floor, laughing, but I can’t laugh with you?” He lectured me while still giggling.

“I’m laughing at my own stupidity. Only I can laugh at myself.”

“Whatever. I thought I was supposed to be the dramatic one!”

The laughter had died down quite quickly after that. Roman helped me up off the floor. We walked to the couch and sat down.

Well… more he sat down, I lay down, and he was my footrest. It’s an us thing.

“Do you always have to put your feet on me, Virge?”

I scoffed and looked at him in disbelief. “Do I have anywhere else to put my feet? No. Do I want you to sit on my feet? No. Do I want to sit up? No. Do I want to move to the other couch? No. Are you my prisoner now? Yes.”

He laughed a little more. I could tell that he was thinking that I stole his job of being the dramatic one.

We sat there in comfortable silence. The only thing keeping it from being awkward was the light and playful atmosphere. I have no clue about you guys, but with a best friend that you’re almost always loud with, silence is just weird and awkward. (This is a thing with me and my best friend. Normally we just randomly quote Charlie the Unicorn at that point.) 

I decided that I needed to bring up the inevitable.

“You gonna ask me about Alonso any time today? I already told you. You can ask me. I trust you.”

He thought for a moment. “Umm…. Well…. What does he look like?”

I snickered a little bit. “Wow. You’re THAT scared that you’re going to offend me?”

He didn’t share my laughter.

“Oh, umm…. Kinda like Remy, but without the stupid sign that says sleep. But like Remy mixed with someone else. I can’t put my finger on who though.” Roman hummed in response. Then he got a mischievous grin on his face.

OH SHIT!! ROMAN DON’T YOU FUCKING DARE.

He dared though.

“So is he hot?”

I looked at him with my most serious “Bitch what the fuck?” face and asked him a simple question: “Roman, you’re my best friend and I love you (platonically), but why are you like this?”

He looked back at me with a “Bitch what the fuck?” face as well. “Because I’m the literal embodiment of Thomas’ romance. And as your best friend, I want you to find love.”

“That wasn’t cheesy at all Ramen.” I snickered a little bit at the Ramen part. Roman absolutely HATES the nickname Ramen. But he’s still Ramen.

“Don’t think Ramen’s going to get a reaction out of me. It’s not. I’m totally fine with that nickname now.”

My mind went to Someone Gets Hurt Reprise from Mean Girls as soon as Ro Ramen said fine. “REALLY FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINE!! GO BE FIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEN!!!”

Roman picked up on the reference and finished the song. “And I want my pink shirt.”

I joined him for the extra part that we add every time we sing/listen to that song.

“HE BROUGHT UP THE PINK SHIRT!! AND YOU KNOW THAT SHIT HAS HIT THE FAN ONCE YOU BRING UP THE PINK SHIRT!!!” We laughed hysterically once more.

Once our laughter had died down again, Roman got serious again. Ish.

“Are you gonna tell me if Alonso is cute or not?”

I couldn’t escape this conversation now. “I don’t know. I guess? You know that this isn’t really my department. It’s like 110% yours.”

He snickered a little bit. “So like, when did you notice him?”

I told him the story. “So Pat was lecturing me about how I should be sleeping and all that bs. I wasn’t really listening because of the hypocrite card. I was staring at the counter and he was just sort of chilling there. Existing.”

I looked at Ro to see his “Vee you’re insane” face but it never came, so I continued.

“Then after Pat went upstairs to get Logan. Alonso, at this point in time I didn’t know his name so I was just referring to him as ‘the counter guy’ in my head, started talking to me by quoting Heathers. I was quoting the scene that he started when Pat and Lo came downstairs. They told me that I was being crazy and that there was only a piece of bread. That’s why I thought that you’d think I’m crazy too.”

Roman looked at me. No discernible emotion could be seen on his face. It was kinda scary. He just told me “I don’t think you’re crazy.”

It took me a moment to comprehend that. “You don’t?”

“At least I think that.”

I didn’t fully think out what I was about to do before I did it. That’s very unusual for me. Might I remind you that I was running on two cups short of a full pot of coffee (Pat and Lo drank them) and like 2 hours of sleep?

I lept off the couch, grabbed Roman’s hand and dragged him up the stairs. Once I got to Pat’s room I kicked the door down. We were greeted with the sight of the glasses gays cuddling on Patton’s bed watching a movie.

After I kicked the door down they looked up at me in shock. Still cuddling though, so that’s a bonus.

Pat spoke first. “Virgil, please tell me why you just kicked down my door.”

I could hardly contain my excitement. I moved to the side a little bit and pulled Roman forward. “RoMaN sAyS i’M nOt CrAzY!!!”

Logan looked at Roman “Roman, please explain.”

Roman looked down at his feet. “Well, do I have a story for you guys.”

----

This chapter is the longest by far. The actual chapter part went over 3 pages. That’s a first.

Anywho. I really liked this chapter. It was quite fun to write. However, the next one will be even more fun to write. The glasses gays turned up to 11. God am I gonna have a ball with the next one.

Chapter 7 will most likely be next week. We’re going to Chicago and it’s a 3-hour drive there and back. I write on my laptop which will be left at home, and I don’t have a phone to write on soooo….. I get to listen to Heathers and Mean Girls mass amounts of times though.

                                            The existing internet writing human,

                                                              Em

----

Taglist (if you’d like to be added/removed please inform me): @winterswishing-reblogs @thetomorrowshow @just-some-gt-trash @iixclementine

[felicityb-reviews]

Experimental SHINee - Feature Spotlight

Hello babies, and welcome to the next Feature Spotlight in the SHINee Spotlight series!! My name is Jace (aka Felicity B), and today we're gonna be taking a slow drive through SHINee's more experimental era. This era in SHINee's career actually features my first SHINee comeback (Dream Girl, dahlings), so I am The Most Excited™ for this FSL!! It feels like Dream Girl dropped ten years ago, rather than just five, but I guess that's what K-Pop does to you.

And in case anyone is wondering why I'm going in reverse chronological order, it's because 1of1 and Misconceptions of Me are my favorite SHINee albums.

Era Spotlight

So, I cheated. I really should have featured from DxDxD in this list instead of ones from FIVE, but I don't really like DxDxD!?!??! It's literally my least favorite SHINee album, sis. FIVE, to be frank with you all, fit more in line with the '90s 5HINee era, but it also fits in this experimental era pretty well.

The name of the game here is experimental, folks. SHINee must have gotten a little bored after they decided to go RnB again after LUCIFER. The bulk of the songs on this list were released in 2013, a year that SHINee really pushed the boundaries of who they were as a group, and I almost kind of miss it. Granted, I loved the maturity in sound they came back with on Odd and 1of1 (the former more than the latter, tbh), but this experimental phase was just a fun time to be a SHINee fan. This list includes songs from both Misconceptions albums, the Everybody mini album, and the previously mentioned Japanese album FIVE.

Spoiler (Misconceptions of You ~Dream Girl~)

Gurl... SHINee was not fuckin' around with us with Spoiler.

Spoiler is a song that Jonghyun wrote incorporating all the song titles from the Misconceptions series in the lyrics. And sis, I was like, "This is cute, or whatevahs!!" when he spoiled the tracklisting for Misconceptions of You, but when Misconceptions of Me dropped and we found out he spoiled that too?!?!?! My wig wasn't just lopsided, she was free floating in space.

SHINee really fucking Did That™ with Spoiler, sis.

Spoiler sounds like someone took Sherlock, and turned her into a vampire. Spoiler is Sherlock's darker and more seductive older sister. It's kind of interesting how they kicked off the Misconceptions series with Spoiler, a song that starts out like their previous title track, but with a dark twist. It's almost like they were making a statement, sis. This SHINee is New and Improved™ SHINee. This SHINee is Upgraded™ SHINee. SHINee 2.0, if you will. We snatched you with RnB/Funk, we snatched you with EDM, and now we're gonna snatch you with both. Enjoy!!

Symptoms (Everybody)

I imagine sex feels like what listening to this song feels like.

Symptoms is an eletro-RnB song that sounds like it was snatched right from the Billboard Top 40. Which doesn't surprise me, because it was produced by the Underdogs (who also produced EXO's Overdose, another song that's dripping in that Top 40 sound from the time). Symptoms is a song that starts out loud and proud; it gives you Drama™, and it gives zero fucks about it. She looks at you without a care in the world and says, "My name is Symptoms, what did you expect!?!?! A cutesy pop track?!?!?! Boi, if you don't get!!"

And mind you, that's what I love about ha.

I fucking love a SHINee song that gives us all the bells and whistles, because they really don't have to. Look at Odd Eye - she's as stripped back as it gets for RnB midtempos, but SHINee still Shine Bright Like A Diamond!! But here's the thing - these dramatic ass niggas love songs like these. You can't tell me these SHINee boys don't love a beat with all the bells and whistles; the way they always come correct on songs like these says it all.

Become Undone (FIVE)

Speaking of songs that lack bells and whistles, Become Undone is not one of them. You'd have to be a Fool™ to think a song titled Become Undone on a Japanese record could be a toned down track.

These types of songs are usually the most dramatic.

Become Undone is an angsty song. She's a song I can see playing during a scene where an anime protagonist has to make an extremely hard decision. Like, intentionally stepping into a trap to save your friends, or deciding between saving your loved ones or the world (don't look at me like that, you guys have seen Sailor Moon).

The main star of the show here is the chorus. That's true of most pop songs, but especially so for Become Undone. She features The SHINee Specialty™ (their ridiculous ability to blend their harmonies together like fuckin' buttah), the trap beats presented in the verse kicked up 10,000 for Maximum Drama™, and orchestral stabs that tie everything together. Become Undone has one of the most emotionally satisfying choruses I've heard in a pop song. Sis, I'm literally the INTENSIFIES meme listening to this song, it's just so good.

I'm really glad that groups like SHINee have had the pleasure of working with a Japanese team to release music in Japan, because it allows them to play with their sound in a way that they can't in Korea. And that's not to say that SHINee haven't played with their sound in Korea (this FSL is literally on the era they experimented with their sound the most), but there's certain sounds and textures that are specifically J-Pop in feel, and it's really cool to see a group like SHINee tap into that.

Orgel (Misconceptions of Me ~Why So Serious~)

Okay sis, now we're actually bringing it down a notch. Not for long, but I figured y'all could use a break, even if it's short lived.

Orgel is a song that's quite similar to Odd Eye in the fact that it's SHINee driving the song with their vocal performance, and the beat is going along for the ride. Orgel also features a melody that sounds like a something you'd hear in a music box, and while that motif is quite overused in pop music, it doesn't make Orgel feel played out. It's just a really pretty song from five really pretty boys.

Orgel is a really neat song, because even though SHINee are driving the song with their voice, they're really not doing a whole lot on the beat. Their vocal performance on Orgel is subtle in the same way the beat is (or rather, as subtle as these boys get), but they still stand out. It's an interesting experience, sis.

Queen of New York (Everybody)

Now this is A Song™, sis.

Queen of New York feels very lounge cafe, sis; she's very "let me sip my expensive coffee drink while I read the latest copy of Cosmo or OK! Magazine". Queen of New York is also very much something the drag queens are voguing to at the local gay club. Miss Queen of New York is a woman of many moods, okay?!?!?!

Queen of New York was a very fun surprise, because I don't think anyone was expecting a song quite like this on the Everbody mini album. She's very edgy, but in a way that you don't expect songs described as "edgy" to sound. Queen of New York has a very polished feel to her, but there's a dirtiness to her that you can't tame. She's a proper Upper Middle Side woman, but she's not afraid to take a walk on the wild side. She's not afraid to show you how to get down, and I just love that so much.

One Minute Back (Everybody)

This is also A Song™, babes.

One Minute Back is grungy, sis. She's not a proper Upper Middle Side woman, she's a punk rock/biker girl with a flair for the dramatic. Ain't nothin' polished here, ladies!! Well, SHINee's vocals are pretty polished, but that's a given. I've never heard a SHINee song where the vocals weren't produced to a T.

But despite that, Ms One Minute Back and Ms Queen of New York are happily married!!

One Minute Back, like Queen of New York, was a song I was pleasantly surprised to hear on Everybody. One Minute back has such grungy verses, but then the chorus and the bridge are so Funky and so SHINee. BUT THE TWO DIFFERENT VIBES BLEND TOGETHER LIKE IT'S NOTHING!! It's such an aurally pleasing experience, you guys!! The reason I compared One Minute Back to Queen of New Year is that they're both marry these two moods to amazing results. I mean, Queen of New York doesn't fully commit to the grunginess, but there's enough of it lying below the surface that it's worth mentioning.

ABOAB (FIVE)

Ms ABOAB is a Bad Bitch™. She's a Boss Bitch™. She has no time for your games, boo. Ms ABOAB is a brazen ElectroFunk number that makes no apologizes.

If SHINee wanted to make a record like Everybody for the Japanese market, ABOAB would have been the title track/lead single. Miss ABOAB is spicy. She's seductive. Miss ABOAB is full on club bounce, and I McFucking L O V E when SHINee do those kinds of songs. There's just something so sexy about them working that club vibe, sis. I lowkey wasn't ready for ABOAB, but she really didn't care. She mesmerizes with the way she flits between emphasizing her Funk and Electro elements.

And that damn drop with the horn line... BITCH!! My wig has been compromised.

Runaway (Misconceptions of You ~Dream Girl~)

Runaway is another ElectroFunk track, but brighter and poppier in a way that contrasts ABOAB quite nicely. It's no less fun and club ready, tho.

Runaway is mainly driven by a punchy synth stab and SHINee's very fun usage of their vocal harmonies. While Miss ABOAB would whip ha weave in ya face if you ever tried to talk to her, Miss Runaway would make silly faces at you and coax you into doing silly dances. I, always and forever, wanna see SHINee in concert, but I especially wanna see Runaway and ABOAB performed live, because they always do these types of club ready tracks Just Right™.

Hitchhiker (Misconceptions of You ~Dream Girl~)

Because God Knows^™ these boys can't not give us a track that channels the very essence of MJ and his weave.

If Spoiler was too gimmicky of a sequel to Sherlock for you, then Hitchhiker is your song. Hitchhiker, to me, sounds like the perfect representation of this era in SHINee's discography - let's take what we already do well and marry it to a whole new palette of song styles/textures, and see what sticks.

And lemme tell you somethin' - Hitchhiker sticks like fucking glue. Remember what I said about SHINee loving the bells and whistles that comes with doing over the top songs?!?!?! That's in full effect here, sis. Hitchhiker is anthemic as all fuck, and these boys ride that beat like they were made for it. And to be completely, I have no doubt in my mind that they were.

Nothing to Lose (FIVE)

So who else was expecting to get something hella grungy like Natalia Kills' Break You Hard or Seventeen's Clap with how hard that guitar was filtered?!?!?! I can't be the only one here.

Nothing to Lose bait and switches us with that dark n grungy guitar riff, because the majority of the song is rather bright n poppy. But I really can't be mad, because I rather liked the way they transitioned the darker sections into the brighter ones. And Nothing to Lose is pure octane fun. It's kind of a hard song to hate, because it gives zero fucks about how cutesy and cheesy it is.

There's also a rather nice helping of Funk thrown into the mix, but I'm gonna pretend that that had nothing to do with much I like this song. Even though it's what makes me like it the most.

Punch Drunk Love (Misconceptions of You ~Dream Girl~)

Punch Drunk Love channels Love Like Oxygen like SHINee's producers were in the studio intentionally trying to produce a sequel to the song. And if you know anything about me, you know that Love Like Oxygen is literal auditory C R A C K for my black ass. Punch Drunk Love also sounds like SHINee's writers held a seance and channeled MJ's spirit when they were writing the song for the boys.

And y'all already K N O W I'm here for that shit.

Punch Drunk Love is the SHINee Five™ on autopilot, sis. SHINee will never not know how to come correct with a Funk song, and it warms my heart. The attitude, the harmonies (THE BUMBACLOT HARMONIES), the overall feel of the song; SHINee gets it right. If you ever needed a pickmeup, then put on SHINee's Punch Drunk Love, and thank me later. This is another song that is unabashedly cheesy, but gives absolutely zero fucks about it.

Isn't it beautiful!?!?!?

Evil (Misconceptions of Me ~Why So Serious~)

Evil can be summed by in two words - Drama and Killer Harmonies.

That's technically three, but you know what the fuck I meant.

Evil is SHINee at their most dramatic. I remember Shawols losing their collective minds at the fancams from the concert performances where they wore blindfolds.

Yes, you read that correctly. These dramatic ass motherfuckers were performing on stage with blindfolds on. They were, more than likely, see through blindfolds, but never doubt SHINee's collective love of the Drama™. They absolutely would dance completely blindfolded.

Evil starts out slow, but I very much doubt that many of us thought the song was gonna stay that way; SHINee were just building the atmosphere (read - creating the perfect environment to torch our weaves). Evil has an almost musical theater vibe to it, except not nearly as cheesy. Evil is honestly a one of a kind experience that we all need in our lives at some point.

Especially because SHINee were on their harmonic A game the day they recorded Evil. When the drums drop out and it's just the orchestral stabs with their voices?!?!? Fuckin' magic, ladies.

Like A Fire (Misconceptions of Me ~Why So Serious~)

We all Know™ Like A Fire, because of that one performance where Jonghyun, Kibum, and Jinki were having a contest to see whom tf could be the most extra (to be honest, I'd say Kibum won, based purely on the fact that I didn't even know he could wail like that). But Like A Fire stands firm on her own by being a wickedly good Funk song.

(Sidenote - I'm about 90% this list has more Funk tracks than my '90s 5HINee FSL, and I want you all know that that was not on purpose. I wont be changing it, but I swear it wasn't done purposefully!!)

Like A Fire, like Punch Drunk Love, is SHINee on autopilot. I don't know what else to say about this song. It's just so Classic SHINee™, sis!! The verses have a more somber, minor tone to them, but the choruses transition (maybe that's a modulation, I'm not Musically Advanced™ enough to make that call) into a killer major groove that is just so beautiful to listen to. I don't know anyone who doesn't like this song. Liking Like A Fire is a requirement for being a Shawol (especially a Shawol of color). If you don't like Like A Fire, you're invalid.

I need to say something about these harmonies and ad libs, tho. Did the producer of Like A Fire tell the SHINee Boys™ to go HAM the day they were laying down tracks for Like A Fire?!?!?! Did they mean for the harmonies and ad libs to get this over the top!?!?! I'm not complaining, I just wanna know. Because the harmonies and ad libs, especially, are so ridiculous!! I love every second of it, but sometimes it K I L L S how extra this song is!!

Diamond Sky (FIVE)

The first time I ever listened to this song, I cackled like a banshee at how extra that intro was, because it's so SHINee. It's so dramatic, and it suits SHINee to a T. I was expecting the verses to be some Final Dragon type shit, or somethin'!!!

Diamond Sky is pretty standard fare for a J-Pop song, imo. It doesn't stop me from loving SHINee's take on it (and it shouldn't stop you), but it's worth mentioning; SHINee + J-Pop = Love. Like I mentioned above, I'm glad that SHINee were able to continue releasing music in Japan, because this is a style of music that suits them well, but would not do well in Korea at all.

Diamond Sky feels like the theme song for a magical girl anime. The twinkly pianos, complemented by the strings and electric guitar give it an air of grandiosity that would have made it a perfect theme or insert song for Sailor Moon. If they had added a modulation at the end for Maximum Drama™, I'd have lost my shit.

Close the Door (Everybody)

Firstly, if you haven't watched the SHINee World IV performance where Jinki tap dances to Close the Door, I'm judging you. Our sweet dubu leader did not bless us with such beauty and grace for you to ignore it!!

Secondly, Close the Door is the cheesiest love song I've ever encountered in K-Pop. It's got the romantic sounding keys, the strings, it's in 6/8 time (perfect for a waltz, babies), the lyrics are so sugary sweet, and the chord progressions utilize mostly major chords. And you know what, I absolutely fucking love it. I'm a cheesy Romantic Gay™, and I fucking love this cheesy ass love song. It's just so aurally pleasing, especially since these SHINee boys all have voices that blend together amazingly when they harmonize. Sue me.

Sleepless Night (Misconceptions of Me ~Why So Serious~)

SHINee ballads are a wonderful, amazing thing, you know?!?!? Especially when they don't give us the typical classical ballad, but go a little left field into something jazzy or RnB. Which is what they do with Sleepless Night.

This week's playlist features a lot of songs that are extremely over the top, sis. And I mean, we've discussed this; these SHINee boys love the drama of it all. But they also love lowkey songs like Sleepless Night. You'd be able to tell if they didn't with a song this stripped back and bare. Sleepless Night is literally the SHINee boys (and their amazing harmonies), a piano, and some strings. And it's fucking amazing. There are quite a few songs from SHINee that I want to experience live, but I think Sleepless Night tops the list. Well, that and Wish Upon A Star, but I'm sure I'd cry my fucking eyes out listening to that. I mean, I might cry my eyes out to Sleepless Night, but there's less of a chance there.

I've accepted that I'm a boring bitch who lives for a good ballad (the amount of ballads I've had to listen to for my RRUs has definitely proven this), but there's nothing quite like a good SHINee ballad, sis. There ain't never been a SHINee ballad that I didn't like.

And that's all for this week's list, loves!! Please tune in next week for the next era in my SHINee Spotlight series, Contemporary SHINee ver.2!! And don't forget to tune in Wednesday for my next Review Roundup, featuring songs released this week!!

Love you, guys!!

[nightingveilxo]

EMP/Unreliable Narrator/Alibi/Editing All Give Sherlock His Audience

First off, you haven’t read meta Sherlock S4 as Epic Theatre, I strongly recommend it.

M: You’ve met him. How many ‘friends’ do you imagine he has? I am the closest thing to a friend that Sherlock Holmes is capable of having. John: And what’s that? M: An enemy. John: An enemy? M: In his mind, certainly. If you were to ask him, he’d probably say his arch-enemy. He does love to be dramatic. John: Well, thank God you’re above all that.

ASiP - Unlike in canon, John begins blogging in order to tell about his life, not to see that Sherlock receives credit for his work. The Detective Inspectors rotate out, rather than being limited to Lestrade and Dimmock. The press receives Wrong! texts that make them an audience. Lestrade and crew are the audience for the drugs bust, and then the moment of realization. His big fan though, is explained as Moriarty. Lestrade’s crew take photos. John thinks Sherlock is amazing, despite “This morning, for example, he asked me who the Prime Minister was.” By T6T, this isn’t amusing anymore, and John tells Sherlock he knows the answer already. Mycroft monitors Sherlock via CCTV, and communicates with John. Film noir and horror references to The Third Man and Nosferatu begin.

TBB - Seb’s staff becomes the audience, and then John, Sarah, and Soo Lin. There’s even an acting troupe. Moriarty is still a big fan.

TGG - Sherlock meets his fan, Moriarty. John and snipers are the audience to their little drama.

ASiB - Sherlock’s audience is with The Queen. It’s actually with his brother, the representative from Buckingham Palace, and Irene, but he finds out Moriarty is still taking an active interest in him. He comes in costume to meet Irene. Lestrade takes video of the outcome, and John takes care of Sherlock.

THoB - Henry, Louise, Dr. Stapleton, and John all become a captive audience. Henry through fear, and being targeted. Louise through John, and then at gunpoint, Stapleton because she has to prove she’s innocent, and John through Sherlock directly. In John’s case though, it backfires, because Sherlock not only says he doesn’t have friends, but John is left to wonder how far Sherlock will go to prove he’s clever. The TARDIS is in a background shot.

TRF - John warns Sherlock they have to be more careful, which will take away Sherlock’s audience. The press is again Sherlock’s audience, but they’re turning against him. Kitty Riley (who later becomes a prototype for Mary-see links below) assists “Richard Brook” with her journalism. Moriarty is the “good old fashioned” villain. John and the snipers are the audience when Sherlock jumps, but Sherlock also has actors, crew, and props that help him. Sherlock no longer has John as his audience, and this is going to result in a lot more film/tv/lit references–things will built-in audiences.

MHR - John receives the box of items from Lestrade, including the DVD that is the Sherlock version of the DW episode “Blink”, where they literally use a script to “communicate”. This mini episode marks where the DW/Torchwood and Rathbone/Bruce overlaps (the LMS train engine) really escalate. Sherlock, although not present, still has John as his audience. Sherlock talking about John’s friends not liking him will come up in TEH, talking about Mary and the wedding guests.

TEH - Restaurants full of people, John, and Mary are Sherlock’s audience, and he even comes in costume. Sherlock’s fan club finds out he’s alive, but a scenario involved Moriarty being put in colored contacts and a face mask to pass as Sherlock, as if his build and height wouldn’t give him away as someone else. Anderson does video of Sherlock’s explanation. The TARDIS is on the wall. Mary is Rathbone/Bruce The Woman in Green and takes over the traits of previous season villains. Sherlock has an audience as he rescues John, his Damsel in Distress, but John is more important. Still, Magnussen has footage in his MP.

TSoT - The Best Man Speech gives Sherlock the wedding guests and Sholto as captive audiences, John calls Sherlock a drama queen, and the villain is the photographer. Stag Night through TFP will mimic the ending of Casablanca.

HLV - Sherlock hasn’t seen John, and has no audience, as he’s in a drug den. We’re introduced properly to Magnussen, the power of MP, and pressure points. There is a camera when Sherlock goes to propose to Janine. Mary kills Sherlock, and his audience is all in his MP, except for Mary and Magnussen. We know from a script segment that Magnussen called the paramedics, and Sherlock’s heart monitor goes backwards. Mary is shown to be a facade through her projection on the buildings. John is furious, but supposedly still decides to be with her, so Sherlock shoots Magnussen for them both. That eliminates Sherlock’s favorite audience, because he is sent away. *Why did Mycroft and crew even film Sherlock shooting Magnussen?

HLV Deleted Scene - Magnussen hides evidence about Mary’s identity and her shooting Sherlock from the police, but offers it to Sherlock. Lestrade wants video, but he and John discover Sherlock has escaped. *Explanation…Eurus.

Alternatively…

TAB - Everyone in the episode is an actor and audience member. It’s set up like a play, and Sherlock says, “The stage is set, the curtain rises, we are ready to begin.” Shotgun wedding mimics TSoT, and romantic entanglement first appears, as well as Watson needing Patience (as opposed to Hope or Faith). John is once more the primary audience, because this is Sherlock’s gay fever dream. Sherlock reads John’s blog from when this was the case, before. Mary is dressed her in Miss Evangelista (DW Silence in the Library ghost/intro to River Song, who later shoots the hero), the brides and Moriarty are all in costume. "Suicide street theatre, murder by corpse – Lestrade you're spoiling us"

Clue: The Movie, where everyone is running around lying about their identities, wearing costumes, there’s a secret messenger, odd phones calls, weapons, a government agent (who might be homosexual, and definitely works for Hoover, who was a “crossdresser” like Uncle Rudy), and a lot of editing/Alternate endings.

 Sherlock Season 4 It’s Not A Game Anymore - That’s Because It’s A Play

T6T - MI6- Same primary audience as HLV, though Lady Smallwood’s name is edited. Aquarium- Same primary audience as in TAB–John, Mary, Mycroft, and Lestrade. Lestrade is fixated on receiving credit, but can’t due to John’s blog. We suddenly have more DIs, which goes with ACD canon. Shark tank mimics Magnussen’s office from HLV, and integrates in another film noir. Mary, the facade is killed by Norbury, which goes back to MHR. Rosie, the Sherlock mirror established by John and Lestrade, is only Sherlock’s audience when Mary isn’t around or conscious. Objects and people disappearing, then reappearing. Technology not working the way it should. These “issues” will continue throughout S4, because someone is remembering/forgetting and/or editing. Sherlock’s reoccurring nightmare is Granada’s Eligible Bachelor & Musgrave Ritual, with his only audience being Ella.

TLD - Sherlock running around quoting the play ‘Henry V’ by Shakespeare. Mycroft doesn’t see all footage when speaking to Lady Smallwood, because it is held back by other people in the room. The blog has gone downhill, and John isn’t receiving credit anymore, so Sherlock is receiving his audience back in a time when John has supposedly written him off (What did the note say? Isn’t that what people do…leave a note?) Faith/Eurus leaves a note of her own. Sherlock has a captive audience in hospital. John is also living Billy Wilder’s (yes, of TPLoSH fame), The Lost Weekend. Most of the ending takes place in someone’s mind, John’s confession isn’t recorded, and Culverton says he doesn’t know what happened–but he owes John (so a mirror owes his life to himself). Mary is still around, handling objects, and it turns out the hat, cane, and umbrella may be recording devices. Voice bleed-throughs abound, and this will happen in TFP, too. Romantic entanglement returns from where it was first discussed in TAB, and the subject of Irene (sex with women), is put to rest. A time gap, and obligatory Epiphany cake, occur after the hug–suggesting Sherlock and John spent the night together. Sherlock has back his most precious audience–John. This continues through TFP.

TFP - Mycroft watching home movies looks like Magnussen watching films in his own MP, and the macabre events staged by Sherlock and John mimic various horror films, as well as Granada’s The Devil’s Foot hallucination. Suddenly, Magnussen is back in the music, and the voice overs continue. The Patience grenade appears, igniting what happened in the greenhouse during TAB. Discussion of Mycroft as Lady Bracknell in production of Wilde’s 'The Importance of Being Earnest’. Further pressure points become an issue, and include integration of Rathbone/Bruce Voice of Terror. COSTUMES!! Eurus is being filmed all the time on CAM, and the numbers are in the same sequence as the cameras used in the train portion of TEH. MRI scans are visible. Moriarty is in pre-recorded footage, and Eurus monitors things the way Mycroft usually does. Mycroft is locked away, and later chastised for what he did regarding Eurus. **John, Daddy Holmes (John’s mirror), and Eurus (Sherlock mirror) are all Sherlock’s primary audience. Sherlock turns his attention to saving John, instead of his own brother. Rosie shows up in 221B at the end, along with Mrs. Hudson, Molly, and Lestrade. Mycroft is still in Sherrinford, maybe as a Mofftiss mirror incapable of seeing John as anything else besides Sherlock’s blogger or friend, despite Sherlock saying John is family.

Other supporting meta and tags are under the cut…

@holmesianscholar @monikakrasnorada @may-shepard @antisocial-otaku @devoursjohnlock @sarahthecoat @mrskolesouniverse @swimmingfeelsinajohnlockianpool @ebaeschnbliah @posh-boy-clever-boy @sherlockshite @gosherlocked @inevitably-johnlocked @simpleanddestructivechemistry @darlingtonsubstitution @jenna221b @sherlockshadow @kateis-cakeis @tjlcisthenewsexy @queerdraco @green-violin-bow @sherlockians-get-bored @princesse-des-lucioles

EMP/Unreliable Narrator/Editing

Justifying Holmes/Watson or Johnlock as a Player in the Drama (Part I)

MHR and Dr. Who “Blink” ( x )   and The MHR Box of Goodies ( x )

Can I Be Of Assistance? BBC Sherlock and The Secret of Sherlock Holmes (The Granada Play)

Sherlock Loving His Touch of the Dramatic

Anyone in Sherlock and How John in TGG Started It Off

Magnussen & Mycroft & Mary (Magnussen’s MP looks like Mycroft’s theatre)

Nothing to Edit or How Lestrade Helps the Editing Process

**A Happy Ending (Mycroft has been an idiot)

Why Was Magnussen Being Shot Filmed?

Sherlock With The Hat From Hell (hat recording)

It Is Possible For the Victim To Do It If They’re Lying (umbrella and cane recording)

A Composite of Villains (Assumes many Mary/Moriarty connections)

Mary is KITTY Riley

Mary is Also Molly (Or how Molly is used)

Why Irene Adler is in TLD & Just Another Source for Mary (Inc info on the morgue scene as memory of Sherlock being beaten.)

Mary is Also Ian from Janus Cars

Kitty is Magnussen while Moriarty is Richard Brook

Ajay as Memories of Torture, Snipers, Bombs, and Moriarty’s NATO Code

Other Related Meta

Mrs. Hudson is Sherlock’s Audience and Transport in T6T & TLD

Sherlock and John Became a Couple in TLD Part I

TFP Not the Real Molly

Lit, Film, and TV References Master Post

MHR and Dr. Who “Blink” ( x )

[thefloatingpoem]

I don't want to be disrespectful, but I don't understand your issue with sherlock and "queerbaiting." I'm all for representation in media, however, realistically not everyone is gay. John has said multiple times in the show that he isn't gay, and he was married to a woman. Two men are allowed to be close friends without having to satisfy a tumblr-worthy homoerotic fantasy. As I said, I fully support representation, but just because two characters aren't gay for each other doesn't make a show bad

There are many things I’d like to unpack in your ask, nonny.

It’s difficult to know where to begin. I’ll start by saying I’m glad you agree that queer representation is important. So let’s start there, with the textual representation of queer people in Sherlock.

The characters who are textually queer in Sherlock include: 

-Moriarty (confirmed most recently in TFP when he jokes about his bodyguard having ‘more stamina, but is less caring in the afterglow’), -Irene Adler (established as gay during the Battersea scene with John, in which to his assertion that he’s not gay, she replies, “well I am. Look at us both.” More on John later. She also nonconsensually drugs and whips Sherlock, which I think is extremely out of character for a professional in the kink community) -Culverton Smith (who has an honest to god hard on when he’s suffocating Sherlock and breathes his fear of death in and says in the most rapturous voice, “lovely”), -Eurus, (who suggests that the victim of her brutal rape could have been a man or a woman and she wouldn’t have noticed)-and to some extent Magnussen (who creepily kisses Sherlock’s hands, among other weird bodily power things he does, like flicking John’s face).

Perhaps you’ve noticed that this is a list of villains, all of whom are queer coded, and most of whom to some extent have the hots for Sherlock and violate Sherlock’s bodily autonomy when he is otherwise incapacitated (other than Eurus, because equating queerness with incest would be a little much even for this show).

So for our queer representation on this show we get 6, count em, 6 queer monsters, 6 queer psychopaths.

Forgive me if I’m less than thrilled about this.

BUT I was willing to overlook this, I was willing to forgive this, because to my view, the plot was inching forward towards a realistic portrayal of queer love—a nuanced and hard won happy ending, a love narrative that would speak to the complexities of human nature and queer identity.

Let’s turn to that question for a while. Queerness does not exist in a vacuum. It exists within a highly oppressive heteronormative framework. And so when you tell me, John has said many times that he isn’t gay, I say unto you: so did I.

My only way of surviving a homophobic environment was to swallow whole the lie that I was straight, to try as hard as I could to believe I was straight. This is compulsory heterosexuality. The result of this doublethink was that I had no interest in romance or sex. But I publically feigned interest in men for many years. I worked hard to convince myself that I was straight and normative. I was trapped deep in a subconscious closet. We often talk about the closet being something that we know we’re in and we want to be out of it. But I tell you, I honest to god thought I was straight. I thought I would marry a man and have children and live in the suburbs. As it turns out, none of those things have happened, thank god. But I spent many years of my life telling people I wasn’t gay.

By the way re: John and his marriage to a woman, being married to someone of the opposite sex has virtually nothing to do with whether you’re gay or not in a world where visible gayness is met with violence, death threats (my gf has literally been chased with a knife), rape threats (this has happened at least three times that I can think of off the top of my head), judgment, discrimination, and hate. Also, many people, like a younger version of myself once did, believe that they are straight and do their best to act accordingly, including marrying someone and finding out later that they were wrong in doing so. All this being said, John could easily be bi or otherwise queer. Suggesting that his marriage to Mary should preclude any and all attraction to men or taking that as proof of straightness is frankly biphobic and erases the bi experience.

But let’s move away from the personal significancer of a John Watson coming out/discovering himself narrative, and towards addressing your other comments.

Regarding your comment, “Two men are allowed to be close friends without having to satisfy a tumblr-worthy homoerotic fantasy”: From my perspective, summing up what the Johnlock fandom does as “tumblr-worthy homoerotic fantasy” is infantilizing and doesn’t give full credit to the depth of thought and nuance that goes into these transformative works.

I can name on one hand the pieces of mainstream media that tell a story like mine. Blue is the warmest colour is one, Carol is another.

The work these fanfiction authors are doing for representation by taking mainstream stories and queeriung them is monumental. But it is still not mainstream media representation. And we deserve that.

And now we come to the queerbaiting portion of my response.

Tropes are what tell us what kinds of archetypal stories are being invoked in the telling of a new story. In TV, there are many different kinds of tropes: plot tropes, lighting tropes, musical tropes, dialogue tropes, camera angle tropes, etc. For example a long lingering gaze in television codes romance for us. It’s a romantic trope. 

For more on tropes, here are some useful resources: http://thorinlock.tumblr.com/post/132779606878/romantic-shots-in-bbc-sherlock

http://ifyouhaveenoughnerve.tumblr.com/post/76422437022/the-unabridged-dictionary-of-johnlock-tropes-157

http://tvtropes.org/

As a culture, we tell a lot of straight white love stories that end happily. Most of our romantic tv tropes come from these stories.

As a culture, we don’t tell many gay stories, and usually when we do, they are tragic and someone dies (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/BuryYourGays). A common trope in stories about lesbians that I hate is that one woman leaves the other for a man—and that’s supposed to be a happy ending.

The point is, the filming and story telling tropes of romance are all over this show and these characters. Close shots of them gazing into each other’s eyes, the soft looks they give each other when they think the other won’t notice, the soft lighting accompanying these scenes, the dialogue, especially in the scene in ASiP at Angelo’s. As an exercise, try imagining that scene if Sherlock were a gorgeous woman.

JOHN: So you’ve got a boyfriend then?


SHERLOCK: No.


JOHN: Right. Okay. You’re unattached. Like me.  Fine.  Good.(modified from this transcript )

And then John licks his lips.

This is where it becomes queerbaiting. When the BBC tweets “Sherlock’s in love, but with who?” in order to promote s4, in which Sherlock’s romantic life is not shown to be developing at all, that is queer baiting. And it’s cruel.

More on queerbaiting:

https://www.autostraddle.com/how-do-we-solve-a-problem-like-queerbaiting-on-tvs-not-so-subtle-gay-subtext-182718/

http://www.afterellen.com/tv/471593-lets-end-queerbaiting-2016

Basically, the idea of gayness between Sherlock and John is a running joke on the show, a joke which has no pay off. Perhaps your sexuality has never been thrown in your face, or laughed at. Perhaps you have never been threatened violence or stalked or whistled at. But I have experienced all of this, just for holding my girlfriend’s hand in public.

So in sum, we have a show using romantic film tropes in order to make a joke about my sexuality, a joke at the expense of the marginalized.

Of course I’m upset and angry.

If this is a show about an epic platonic male friendship, that’s fine.

(Epic platonic male friendship is the oldest, most done narrative in existence, by the way. This is an excellent if somewhat dry book about the cultural shift in the twelfth century from tales of epic brotherly love/devotion between knights to tales of chaste courtly love between men and aloof women).

But in that case, stop it with the romantic TV tropes, stop teasing queer fans on twitter, stop making homophobic “no homo” jokes for the straight audience to have a laugh at my expense, and for god’s sake, stop writing all of your villains as queer coded psychopathic monsters. Was that really necessary??? It’s homophobic and it’s bad, lazy writing, and we deserve better representation than that. We deserve more than psychotic gay villains and desperately unspoken hidden subtext and winks and nudges on twitter from the creators. We deserve real representation, no hinting, no winking, no implying. Real, textual queer representation.

My last comment to you, nonny, is this: Indeed, not everyone is gay. And neither is everyone straight. I’m tired of never seeing myself or any part of my identity reflected in mainstream media.

For more information about media’s skewed representation of the world, see this GLAAD report. 

[sarapteropus]

Queerbaiting, Sherlock, and a lesson in the sexuality spectrum

All right. It’s time to get stuck into this queer baiting mess.

So far everything I’ve read seems to discuss how the audience is owed nothing, and the show’s creators always said it wasn’t going to happen. I’m not going to discuss this angle because I already have way too much to say and these people have summed it up very well.

What I want to talk about, is sexuality.

If you are at all a member of the LGBTIQ+ spectrum, in any shade, then you know that sexuality is complex, fluid, and fickle as fuck. Labels put people in boxes, can cause all kinds of crippling anxiety, and make a person feel like they have to construct themselves in a way that adheres to society’s interpretation of that label. In reality, things are just not that simple. At all.

Consider this: you are a heterosexual. You have no homosexual tendencies at all, and never have - you’re happy and comfortable with who you are and have never felt the desire to change or explore. Now, imagine meeting someone of the same sex that blows you away. I’m talking intelligence, looks, confidence, wit, bravery, determination, morals, loyalty, badassery, you name it, this person has exceeded your expectations.

Do you love this person? Yes. You do. Are you in love with this person? Maybe. You don’t know. Aren’t you straight? Well, shit. What’s happening? Now you’re questioning all your life decisions and who you are and your true identity and trust me, it’s a head fuck. 2/10 would not recommend.

With this mental state in mind, can we just take a second to remember the incredible line from Irene Adler, where she makes yet another quip about John’s obvious love for Sherlock. John says with complete exasperation that, if anyone still cares, he’s not actually gay.

“Well I am,” says Adler.

WELL I AM.

Can we have a god damm standing ovation for this woman?!

Adler, a happily homosexual woman, is attracted to Sherlock. She doesn’t care about your labels and your rules. She doesn’t care about needing to be one or the other. She’s going to do whatever she damn well wants. She is strong, much stronger than John, and she’s brave enough to go after what she wants. This does not make her a heterosexual all of a sudden, it makes her a normal human with human desires that change and fluctuate and are fluid and free. But she is a rare case, and not everyone is this brave or self-aware. And not everyone is as sexual as she is. This is very important.

This brief conversation is one of my favourite lines from any show. As a lesbian-identifying woman who has had male partners and often comments on attractive men, it gets tiring to hear “But aren’t you a lesbian?” Now throw in the fact that my partner is non-binary, and you have a lot of self-conflict on the ‘sexuality is whatever the fuck you want it to be’ spectrum. My favourite answer to this question is “I’m gay, not blind.”

Which brings me back to labels, both self-administered and socially designed.

It took years to find my feet, to happily and outspokenly declare myself a proud lesbian. Those years were scary, full of questions, a whole lot of experimenting and figuring out how exactly the whole gay thing went and what it meant to me and I could go on and on. The point is, it was a long ass time and it was fucking confusing, and the biggest thing of all: It. Still. Is.

Now think about John. Heterosexual John is faced with the all round 10/10 stunning asexual Sherlock. What in the world makes anyone think that these two men are going to suddenly jump ship and start having a romantic relationship? This process is so complex and consuming and at times it breaks you, yet we expect this of one character who is so emotionally vacant and another who is very happy on the straight and heterosexual life path? It’s confusing enough that they love each other at all without throwing romantic love into it.

The show is clever. It is intellectually clever and it is emotionally clever, socially clever, and sexually clever. Sticking two men in a room and making them suddenly gay would be a complete cop out, and wholly offensive to the intricacies and nuances of sexuality, not to mention a shameless ploy for grabbing the LGBTIQ+ crowd’s attention.

Let’s spell it out.

Making John and Sherlock form a romantic relationship would be sexualising a character that is not sexual. It would be making a character homo(or otherwise)sexual that is a heterosexual. It would be ignoring every internal conflict that occurs when someone does something that goes against their inherent sexuality. It would be adhering to societal pressures that tell us a show has no worth unless there is a sexual romance. It would offend via ignorance of any intricacies of sexuality, especially within the LGBTIQ+ spectrum. It would confirm the stereotype that two males cannot have a loving relationship without the high school notion that they must be gay. It would trivialise the entire concept of sexuality. It would completely counter Sherlock’s character. It would simplify an incredibly complex process of self-discovery. It would destroy the relationship of John and Mary, which, just a friendly reminder, is canon, and very much an integral part of the tale. And lastly, it would be downright pandering to the fans who have created a homosexual fantasy for two characters which the creators themselves have said time and time again are NOT going to have a homosexual relationship.

Adler is a character that so brilliantly shatters what it means to be gay or straight. She effortlessly challenges social constructs of labels and expectations. She is brave and strong and she gives precisely zero shits about whether or not John is straight because she knows that it doesn’t matter, because you don’t need to be gay to love someone of the same sex. With one line, she sums up my entire point.

So please, fans. Stop throwing around the term queerbaiting. Stop condemning two very clever creators for actually doing a pretty damm good job of exploring some tremendously complex ideas. The world is not simple, and John and Sherlock forming a romantic relationship is far, far too simple.

- TL;DR: Sexuality is a lot more complex than shoving two men in a room and making them gay so stop with the queerbaiting anger pls.

- I am one queer with an opinion, and I have no doubt you have yours. I am open to debate as long as everyone else is too.