#tired all the time

[xxvergoldetxx]

TW SH RELATED RANT

There are just some things you just can’t talk about to someone who has no personal experience with s3lf h@rm. They just can’t possibly understand and would be either scared or worried.

Here’s what I’d like to talk about:

When I think about relapsing, I scroll through pictures of the bloody limbs of strangers and it doesn’t even phase me. Sometimes I just look at the pictures when I’m fine, because it’s been my normality for so long that seeing those images feels comforting.

When I see someone with more or deeper scars, I feel the urge to cvt because I think my scars aren’t bad enough.

When I used to cvt, I often did it to cope with overwhelming sadness or anxiety or as a punishment. But I also did it when I was happy or bored, just because I was so used to the sensation.

Sometimes I used to cvt in school for no reason at all, just because it had become a habit and cvtting before a certain class was like putting shoes on before leaving the house.

I once carved crosses because I found it tragically pretty and liked the idea of actually being a little crazy.

Sometimes I would just cvt because I liked the thrill of having something to hide.

I liked the feeling of bl00d running down my body and also the panic when I realised how much it was.

My bath water turning red felt like an accomplishment.

After my first couple relapses I couldn’t look at my body without crying because I really did try.

Sometimes I wish I had become clean a little later because I then I’d have just a bit more scars.

I’m not going to release just like this but sometimes I’m not even sure I wanna stay clean.

[secretrainbowagent]

I had to pick a book for an English assignment lol

it's time to traumatize my classmates :D

[sewingbluebee]

I want to do some cutting but I'm wayyyy too tired now (after work). So I'm gonna pack up to cut on coming weekend instead. Rmb this fabric...I bought it from a delhi trip. The store owner said it is indian silk but I've no idea how to prove it. I heard u can burn it see if it is silk or not but I'm not too sure so I rather not.

Anyway...I'm thinking what to make of this soft fabric....this fabric will suit something like this:

But I don't wear sleeveless and I dunno if cowl neckline will suit my plus size figure (too low cut). So I'm thinking of a round neck basic top. Yes, again. Something I've sewn before. It will get alot of wear tho. I'm still thinking.

Maybe a button collared shirt? I dunno...that will involve a different tedious pattern making process...and sewing a collar in this soft fabric will not be easy. Let me think...

I'm lazy so I'll probably think of something simple. I'm sooo looking fwd to this weekend to sleep. Work have been crazy this past 2 weeks. Next week my colleague comes back so I can pass him back his work. Yay.

[sevsartstuff]

There isn't enough time in the day. Work, taking care of the pets, making food, housechores, paperwork, and, sleep devour my day. Then I have to choose between having a social life, playing a game, reading a book, looking at/making art or staring at nothing/tv in despair/exhaustion ....

[daydreamsofdragons]

soso eepy

[postwarlevi]

I'm pretty sure tired is just part of my personality description now.

[xxvergoldetxx]

Today I drank alone even through I promised myself I wouldn’t do that ever again and then I wanted to hurt myself because I thought it’s what I know and what I deserve and then I thought it’s never too late to be gentle with myself because the sun sets and rises and why shouldn’t I??

[secretrainbowagent]

Fucking finished it!!!!!!!!!

[sewingbluebee]

I've cut all my pieces for my maxi dress. Hopefully I'm not too tired to sew it by this week.

[knightofleo]

K.I.D. | Prodigal Daughter

[lz-01]

love waking up still exhausted, what even is the point of sleep

[nalliax]

Here's a selfie since I haven't been here a while. Morning shifts are kicking my ass more than I thought. Do they ever get easier? The only thing getting me through is I get off early enough to work on my garden and flower beds. 🌼

[beatheprincess]

I hope all my Spanish speaking followers understand my posts🥺 mi espanol es muy peqenuo and I only had 2 classes so sorryyyyy aa theres alot of languages I'd love to learn but my motivation is nonexistent

[nurfhurdur]

I don't have the energy now but I really want to write Henry just venting all of his hurt against Jesse.

[gossipgirlheresstuff]

•T

Studying, drawing, enjoying

[missserotoninsyndrome]

Am I the only person who completely loses their appetite when they’re overstimulated? Ugh