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coeurdastronaute · 3 years ago

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Nerd 15

Previously on Nerd

It hadn’t been a particularly good sleep. Lexa felt like she woke up every hour or so, each time checking to make sure the softly snoring girl beside her was still there, still asleep. Despite her own tossing and turning, Clarke didn’t seem to move much, just curled up tightly into herself, against Lexa’s side. Lexa kind of liked the feeling of the other body in her bed. She kind of liked that she was the person Clarke wanted.

Sometime after the tenth to twelfth time she woke up, Lexa realized the sun was up, and she couldn’t fight with her body waking any longer. Clarke didn’t move, and the night weighed on her girlfriend.

With a certain effort, Lexa decided to extract herself from the bed, even though Clarke didn’t seem to notice. It actually appeared as if Clarke was a very sound sleeper, as Lexa moved around the room and bumped the edge of her elbow on her desk and hissed at the contact. But as she stood still, she realized Clarke didn’t budge a bit.

Lexa scrolled through her phone as she tugged on some fresh clothes, checking over her shoulder quickly to make sure Clarke wasn’t peaking for some weird reason. She didn’t want Clarke to know how curious she was about the party before she arrived, but a part of her was incredibly interested in what might have panned out.

Like a thief, Lexa tugged on socks and buttoned her pants as she danced through the door in her attempt to remain as quiet as humanly possible. It took her a minute to close to door, watching it slowly inch toward the clasp, and finally it clicked nearly silent. She pushed her hair out of her face and slid into the bathroom, shoving a toothbrush into her mouth as she leaned against the counter and scrolled through the feed of Bellamy Blake’s infamous party.

As she scrubbed she watched the night happen in glimpses. She watched her girlfriend taking shots. She watched her girlfriend in that bikini. She watched her girlfriend look like she was desperately chasing an escape and numbness and it made Lexa mad for her. Lexa spit and rinsed and brushed and decided it was a good idea to scroll through Bellamy’s posts and she couldn’t understand how Clarke could like such different people. Bellamy Blake held week long parties and won state championships and got scouted. Lexa made movies and played board games and couldn’t figure out how to take a bra off.

With a final rinse she called her sister, hoping the time difference would mean she was awake, but as she bounded down the steps, she was met with a voicemail and furrowed. She needed research and information. Anya knew about all of this.

“You’re up early for someone having a sleepover with their girlfriend,” her mother greeted her as she looked up from the newspaper spread out across the kitchen island. Her father looked up over the edge of the sports section before looking back down.

“I told you we didn’t have to worry,” he muttered, flapping the paper out. Lexa rolled her eyes and took a seat.

“It wasn’t a sleepover.”

“Your girlfriend spent the night in your bed. I’d call it a sleepover, and I’d say we’re pretty cold parents for allowing it.”

“I appreciate it, but nothing was going to happen.”

“Good, because we discussed how alcohol can alter perception and consent--”

“Yes, yes,” Lexa sighed and reached for an apple as her father droned on yet again, hoping to avoid another sex talk. “I know, Dad.”

They all remained in a respective silence while working past the moment. It was weird, to want to talk to someone, let alone to have anything to talk about, but Lexa felt this need to figure something out, though she wasn’t sure what it would be. She wished her sister had just picked up the phone.

“So is Clarke…”

“Still asleep.”

“Did you have fun at the party?”

“I wasn’t there long,” Lexa shrugged. “I was at Luna’s working on our submission until late. Gus was there, so I knew people.”

She didn’t mention Michelle from math and her bikini. That felt inappropriate.

“How’s Clarke doing?” her mother pressed, sipping from her coffee again, warily watching her daughter.

“She’s… I don’t know. Sad. Mad. Stuck. Overwhelmed.”

“It was nice that you went to get her. I appreciate you telling us what’s going on instead of trying to sneak around. Anya did that. I can’t tell you how many times I had to pretend not to notice boys sneaking around the yard.”

“Really?”

“We trust you both,” her father explained. “We just appreciate you doing making us have to stretch it so far.”

“And we like Clarke, so we’re happy to help.”

“I don’t really know what else to do, you know?” she muttered, wiping her mouth and leaning against the counter, her knee coming up on the stool. “I think I’d be a little upset too if I were in her shoes, so I would want to probably do a bunch of stuff, but also I don’t want her to be upset.”

Lexa’s father looked at her and then to his wife. She cocked her head and gave him a look, to which he returned a shrug and ushered her to do something. They were stuck as well because no parenting book prepared them for teenagers. And Anya was very different.

“You can’t do anything,” he finally offered.

“Tim!” his wife warned.

“It’s true. You can’t make this better. It’s between Clarke and her mother and her father. But you can be there for her, and try to encourage her to be healthy about grief and pain. You have some experience, I’d say.”

Lexa looked back at him and clenched her lips, worrying the bottom one as she mulled over his words.

“And as much as we love what you want to do and be for Clarke, please don’t forget who you are in all of this. You have needs nad you have goals. Someone else’s wellness is not entirely on your shoulders.”

“I know.”

“But just be around. That’s all anyone can do. Be of service to others.”

“Your father’s right though,” her mother continued. “You can’t fix it, just be there. It’s a boring answer.”

“If Dad were dying would you have an affair?”

“Jesus, Lexa.”

“What?”

“I’d haunt you,” Tim decided before turning back to his paper. “I’d haunt you really hard.”

“I’m done with both of you today,” she decided, tossing her part of the paper in his lap as she walked through the living room. “It’s not even eight and I’m retreating to my office. I hope you’re both proud.”

The pair shared a smile and shrugged as she disappeared down the hall.

“You know, just because we gave you one sleepover, I hope you don’t get too comfortable asking. This was an emergency. It’s always okay in an emergency, and you know the difference.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“I have golf in a bit, but this afternoon we could do some driving practice if you wanted?”

“Sounds good,” Lexa smiled.

For no reason at all, except maybe utter relief that she didn’t have to deal with the same problems Clarke did, she hugged her dad’s neck lazily over the back of the couch before making her way back upstairs.

XXXXXXXXXX

The vague memories of the night lingered like the stale taste of terrible vodka and beer, and Clarke smacked her lips, hoping to find any kind of liquid to get rid of the dry mouth. But her eyes felt heavy and glued shut, and her stomach felt like it was currently on the spin cycle, so moving wasn’t entirely feasible.

It had been dumb. It’d been stupid, even. Possibly as far as moronic, to go to Bellamy’s party, but it was the best alternative and boy did it feel nice to escape. Even the current state she found herself in was a welcomed punishment from feeling fine and being unable to exist in the world. Her current physical ailments felt like finally, the universe was manifesting itself, and she could fix the swirling stomach and cottonmouth. She could fix the spinning and soreness and bruises from God-knew what happened last night.

There wasn’t much else to be done, she suspected. Fix this moment, this hour, this day, and hope to survive to another one. It all had to end at some point.

Clarke finally managed to open her eyes, a feat she was certain no other human could have accomplished. She looked around Lexa’s room and gratefully accepted the water bottle and aspirin waiting beside the bed.

It took until halfway chugged, that she realized she was empty and the room was quiet. So she took a breath and held her stomach, certain she could hold it down. Carefully, she dressed, stealing Lexa’s old track sweats and an older soccer shirt, before making her way down the hall in search of something to fill her stomach.

“Someone else’s wellness is not entirely on your shoulders.”

“I know.”

Clarke paused at the top of the stairs when she heard the family talking. It felt like it was about her. She knew it had to be. It made her want to vomit.

“But just be around. That’s all anyone can do. Be of service to others.”

“Your father’s right though. You can’t fix it, just be there. It’s a boring answer.”

It was hard to be the subject of needing things. Clarke wasn’t someone who needed anyone. She wasn’t someone who wanted or needed to depend on anyone, and yet there was a girl, a girl who was too afraid to make a move, who imagined the world in terms of movie scenes and interpreted her own existence in the great world as a cosmic joke, always waiting for the punchline-- and this girl wanted to fix things.

“If Dad were dying would you have an affair?”

“Jesus, Lexa.”

“What?”

It hadn’t been a joke, but it made Clarke smile. No one expected that Lexa was serious, and she wanted to know the answer. There was shuffling and moving, and Clarke crept her way back to Lexa’s room.

She felt even dumber than she thought possible for going to see Bellamy. She wouldn’t do it again. She wouldn’t. She wouldn’t. She wouldn’t. The words echoed in her head. She meant it, she was certain. She wouldn’t.

“You’re awake,” Lexa grinned as she quietly closed the door behind her only to find her girlfriend sitting in her bed.

“I’m never drinking again.”

“Mhm, we’ll see.”

“Don’t be mean to me, I’m sick.”

“You’re hungover.”

“You don’t know what it feels like, do you?” Clarke accused, accepting the orange and another bottle of water that was handed to her as her girlfriend joined her in bed.

“Don’t see much appeal.”

“It always seems like a good idea at the time…”

Lexa just shrugged and crossed her legs. She ran her thumb along the faded script on the side of Clarke’s knee.

“I should head home,” she decided softly. “Sleep this off and such.”

“You could sleep here. I’m just going to work on the car a bit. Maybe go for a run. I have homework to finish.”

“I have to go home at some point.”

“Maybe.”

“It was very sweet of you to come get me.”

“I’m just glad you texted.”

“I’m not going to be like this, you know?”

“You can be however you want.”

It was a sweet sentiment that Clarke didn’t have the mental capacity to sit with, she decided, because she wasn’t ready to decide to be anything. But tomorrow, maybe, she’d think about it. She knew what she didn’t want to be, and that seemed like something, at least.

“I texted Raven to come get me.”

“If you’re sure.”

“I needed last night to cleanse myself, I think. I need today to regroup.”

“You have a very weird process,” Lexa decided.

Clarke just chuckled and leaned forward, burying her face in Lexa’s thigh and sighing.

XXXXXXXXXX

For the moment, the very tiny, very quick moment, everything felt like it was caught up, and Lexa allowed herself a few moments of quiet in the garage, because come hell or high water, she was going to finish the car by the last day of school. SATs were done, finally, and something that didn’t need to be explicitly worried about until scores were released in a few weeks. Her prom outfit was already purchased and prepared. Homework and studying were done. Sports were over for the season and conditioning wasn’t set to start for another two months, though she’d start her own soon enough. Her girlfriend was at work and then going off to a cheer competition for the weekend. Luna was putting the finishing touches on their film school application project. And anyone else that might ask Lexa to do anything was promptly ignored.

Two weeks before spring break, and Lexa was feeling high on her on efficiency.

All in all, Lexa decided that she had at least three days to power through as much as she could with her dad in a final push before sending it off to the paint appointment.

She hadn’t counted on her sister though, and as her phone blared, interrupting the music playing over the speakers, she smacked her head on the body of the car and slid herself from under it, grumbling the entire time.

“Don’t you have fancy plans. It’s a Friday night,” she chided the eldest.

“I’m getting ready, I was just thinking about you.”

“Gross.”

“Because I ran into a girl that asked about you and I had no idea you had a friend at CMU, let alone a drop dead gorgeous film student.”

Lexa furrowed and twirled her wrench around before trying to dive back in under the seat and finish installing the seatbelts in the back. It dawned on her then and she snorted.

“That’s just Costia.”

“Ohhh, just Costia-- who the fuck is Costia?”

“I met her when I came to visit last fall remember? You were the one telling me to make a move but I was very drunk, something you did to me as well?”

“Doesn’t ring a bell.”

“At the party. I posted a picture…” she grunted and twisted. “She found me on Instagram. We talk about movies and I’ve shown her some of my stuff and junk.”

“Interesting.”

“Why?”

“Just not many freshman looking to hang out with high school juniors.”

“I’m clearly advanced.”

“Clearly,” Anya rolled her eyes over the phone.

“I’ve been talking to her about film programs and applying--”

“Here? You’re thinking about coming here?”

“Fuck!” she hissed and sat up, doing her best to suck on the cut that came to her thumb from her maneuvering. “I don’t know.”

It wasn’t a serious inquiry, Lexa thought to herself. She was set. She had a plan with Luna. They’d had it since they were ten, and there was really on reason to deviate from it. But then a stranger liked her stuff, and this stranger made stuff Lexa liked. And the stranger became a friend who gave her some screenwriting tips and pushed her to get better at it. And the stranger told her the east coast was just as important to film.

But it didn’t matter.

There was a plan.

“You should seriously consider it. It’s a great program I hear. Come out for spring break!”

“I should stay here.”

“And do what? Work on that car? Dad already told me he’s sending it out for interior and paint. You’re pretty much done anyway.”

“Mom and Dad have conferences that week. I was going to watch movies all week with Clarke.”

“Bring her too. Sounds like she needs an escape.” Anya was getting excited, and Lexa was tugged along for the ride. “You can crash in my dorm. Even just for a few days, not the whole week.”

“Mom won’t like me missing so much time to study.”

“Call it a college visit for a potential school.”

“Luna will lose her mind,” Lexa shook her head and pinched her thumb to try to stop it without a bandaid.

“Fuck Luna. I’m going to ask Mom if she’d rather you were here, supervised by me, or home alone for a whole week.”

From the change in volume, Lexa knew she was texting immediately. She sighed. It would be fun to see the school as a potential option. It might even be nice to catch up with Costia. It would even be better to see her sister, who just at the moment, she realized she’d missed since her last visit.

“Should I ask Clarke if she wants to go?” Lexa finally ventured, returning to her work.

“Definitely.”

“Should I really consider your school as an option?”

“You should.”

She had a plan, Lexa remembered, and there was no point deviating, but she did want to see her sister.

“If they say it’s okay.”

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elyreywrites · 4 years ago

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singing here’s to never growing up

more batkids shenanigans - this time inspired by a comment on a YouTube video of Avril Lavigne’s “My Happy Ending”. thank you so much to the Capes & Coffee Discord for brainstorming this fic with me, and helping me figure out ages! and an especially huge thank you to Bumpkin and Oceans on that server for being my betas for this fic!!

this fic is set in 2020. the character ages & years born are: Bruce: 37 - born 1983 Dick: 25 - born 1995 Jason: 20 - born 2000 Tim: 17 - born 2003 Damian: 11 - born 2009

title is from Avril Lavigne’s “Here’s to Never Growing Up”!

please REBLOG - DO NOT REPOST

AO3 Link

Teen 1,276 words Tim Drake & Dick Grayson & Jason Todd & Damian Wayne & Bruce Wayne part of my batkids shenanigans series

Summary:

Dick is just trying to get in touch with his inner angsty teenage girl. He didn’t ask for an existential crisis. Tim is making him have one anyway.

- - - - -

“…and it’s not like most plot-driven things – movies, books, shows, whatever – where the side stories might be briefly referenced but you don’t have to read them to understand what’s going on. The side games are absolutely crucial to understanding the plot.”

Jason snickered as Tim ranted about the Kingdom Hearts series. Sure, all Jason said was that he had only played the second game and was thinking about playing the first to understand the plot better, but that was ridiculous!

“If you play the first game and then go straight to the second, you’ll end up completely lost,” Tim huffed. “It starts with totally different characters and very little explanation of where they came from. That’s why you play ‘Days’ and ‘Re:Chain of Memories’—”

“Shhh,” Jason hissed, covering Tim’s mouth. “Do you hear Avril Lavigne?”

Tim paused just before he bit Jason’s hand and listened. Down the hall, he could faintly hear music.

“’All this time you were pretending. So much for my happy ending.’” Okay, that was definitely Avril Lavigne. With a tilt of his head, Tim gestured for them to investigate.

Down the hall, one of the lesser used sitting rooms had its door cracked open as the music spilled from inside. Tim slowly pushed the door open more and poked his head in. From the line of heat along his back, he knew Jason was leaning over him. That, and the chin that rested on his head because Jason was an asshole that took every opportunity to remind Tim that he’s shorter.

Tim blinked. Above him, Jason turned a near-silent snicker into a cough. Laying upside-down on the couch – feet dangling over the back and hair brushing the floor – was Dick, lip-syncing the words as dramatically as possible without changing position.

“Dick? What are you doing?” Tim asked, giving up the pretense of being sneaky and just walking in. The quiet curse behind him told him that Jason hadn’t been prepared to suddenly lose his support.

Either their older brother knew they were there or he was too good to visibly startle – each as equally likely – but it meant that Dick didn’t jump or even bother looking at them. “I’m getting in touch with my inner angsty teenage girl,” he explained.

Jason sprawled on the other end of the couch, leaving Tim to sit on the coffee table. “Any particular reason, Dickiebird?”

Dick spread his hands in an approximation of a shrug. “It be like that sometimes.”

Here’s the thing: Tim had gone through a bit of a phase years ago, and during that phase he was curious about when Avril Lavigne’s songs were released – he was a weird kid, okay? He never expected that information to come in handy, but it was his job as a little brother to torment his siblings. “Hey Dick,” Tim grinned, “guess how old I was when this song came out?”

“Why?” Dick asked, already sounding suspicious.

“I was about a year old, depending on the month,” Tim told him cheerfully.

“Nooo,” Dick whined, “Tim, why? Oh my god, you were a baby! And now you’re a teenager that’s nearly an adult and I’m old!”

“I was twenty-one,” Bruce scoffed, leaning against the doorway and drawing everyone’s attention. “I’m thirty-seven now. Please Dick, tell me about being old.”

“You don’t understand, B! At least you were already an adult, and now you’re just a more adult-adult. Tim was a tiny little baby and now he’s practically all grown up! I was a kid, and now I’m an actual adult! With a job! I’m having a crisis right now!”

Tim hummed. “Then I probably shouldn’t mention that her song ‘Sk8er Boi’ is older than I am.”

Dick wailed as Jason started howling with laughter so much that he grabbed his ribs.

“Tim! Why would you say that?!”

Damian walked in right then, scowling. “What idiotic nonsense is Drake spewing now that has you in a fit, Grayson?” Before anyone could answer, his brows furrowed and he added, “And why are all of you listening to such old music?”

That set Jason off again and Tim joined in. Their combined laughter wasn’t nearly enough to drown out Dick’s small, quiet sob as he slid off the couch to be a human puddle of existential crisis on the floor. “Babies,” he whispered. “I’m surrounded by babies. All of you are children. Oh my god.”

“Hey! I’m not a fuckin’ child, I’m twenty goddamn years old!” Jason argued.

Dick shrieked, “You can’t even legally drink!”

“Did you know you’re older than Google by three years, Dick?” Tim said. Dick whimpered.

Rolling his eyes, Bruce lightly cuffed Tim on the back of the head. “Give him a break, kiddo.”

“I have yet to have an answer as to why you all are listening to this infernal racket,” Damian demanded.

Within a couple seconds, Jason went from wheezing for air to completely solemn as he looked at Damian. “Sometime, kid, you just fuckin’ need to get in touch with your inner angsty teenage girl, and Avril Lavigne is the shit for that.” His faux-serious expression shattered with a smirk as he tacked on, “Also, I’m pretty sure Jon’s got this album.”

Damian scoffed and stormed out, muttering about being surrounded by idiots – Dick must have shown him Lion King then – and Tim snickered again. On the floor, Dick was still muttering and moaning about children and babies and “I’m so old, I’m like the Crypt Keeper”.

Tim bit his lip to stop himself from telling Dick that Freaky Friday – which was already apparently a remake – came out about a month after he was born. That could be saved for the next time Dick had a crisis about his age.

- - -

Two weeks later, Tim stopped halfway through ranting at Dick for only playing the main titles of Kingdom Hearts to stare down the hall. Much like the last time he was on a tangent about the game series, he could hear Avril Lavigne playing from somewhere. Except the only rooms down that hall were their bedrooms, and Jason and Dick stood on either side of him. The three glanced at each other, and Dick immediately grinned and bounced down the hall. Jason was smirking as he followed, and Tim trailed after hoping this wouldn’t end with Damian trying to stab him again.

Dick burst in as soon as he reached Damian’s room, where the music was definitely blaring from behind the door. “Dami, you’re listening to Avril Lavigne!”

When Tim peaked in, Damian was face-planted on his bed with his face towards the foot of the bed.

“I do not wish to talk about it,” he snapped, muffled as it was.

“Aw,” Dick pouted, “do you want a hug?”

Snarling, Damian lifted his head up enough to glare at all three of them. “I would prefer for you to leave my room at once!”

“Alright Dickie,” Jason said, grabbing and hauling Dick out, “leave the brat to fuckin’ wallow in his anti-social, pre-teen angst. Sometimes you just need to angst it out alone, as you damn well know.”

“Aren’t you the literature nerd? I mean, really, Little Wing, ‘angst it out’?” Dick snarked.

Tim pulled Damian’s door closed and followed after. “Hey, language is fluid and always changing,” he added.

Gesturing at him for emphasis, Jason declared, “Fuckin’ exactly! All words were made up at some point, and English is already a fucking mess of words from different languages smashed together! And at least a shit ton of the rules have exceptions!”

Tim nodded, “Like the ‘I before E except after C’ rule.”

“Here we go again,” Dick muttered.

“You fuckin’ started it!”

#batfam #batfamily shenanigans #batkids shenanigans series #fanfiction #crack fic #elyrey writes things #tim drake #dick grayson #jason todd #bruce wayne #damian wayne #dcu #batman #red robin #red hood #nightwing #robin #avril lavigne songs referenced #tim drake is a little shit

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pilferingapples · 5 years ago

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TMA S2 Natter I guess!!

LORE LORE LORE LORE WHOOO

under the cut for massive major spoilers of course

- I’m really glad I’m binging this, it helps me remember things to have a big chunk of story and lots to pick up on all stacked together and reinforcing itself. I still have to check and double check the Fan Wiki for names here and there, when I hear someone I KNOW I recognize from earlier; I’ve inevitably run across some spoilers that way, thanks to the structure of the wiki, so I’m really glad I’m needing to do that less and less as the show goes on; I don’t think I had to check anything in the last ten episodes, thought I did still have to go to the wiki to get links to the Transcripts, because

- I find the tunnel-echo effects make the dialogue pretty unparseable no matter how loud I have the show, unfortunately. I could understand Michael,and not much else. (I mean,I could understand Michael’s voice, the Spiral’s motives and all are fairly opaque to me still.) The voices and acting lend so much ambiance, I would have been happy to watch along on the YT vid with subtitles , but it doesn’t have subtitles? Frustrating, but I do really appreciate there being transcripts!

- Michael makes me really, really sad. He was just a kid who stayed out in the rain a second too late! It wasn’t even his idea! And he got Marked and he lost his whole damn life to this thing before he was even old enough to have a good grasp on what reality is in the normal swing of things. Poor kid. Poor Michael-that-should-have-been. (ETA so I don’t answer this multiple times: I’m aware Lightning-and-Tower Michael might not be Hallways and Hands Michael, but this is just name-association, really. Also, there’s a growing horror in S2 in finding so many people who seemed to escape their encounters showing up again in much worse shape in other Statements...)

- Thanks to Tumblr Osmosis , I’m sure the Endgame OTP (at least so far) in Jon/Martin, and while I’m currently not a fan of that (though totally prepared to change my mind according to character/relationship development!) I am delighted to be able to enjoy Jon and Basira’s relationship without worrying that her character is going to be suddenly smashed flat to make her The Love Interest. I love their weird uneasy alliance! I hope she comes back but also hope she goes somewhere Far Away and lives Ordinarily Ever After.

-on that note, Daisy Daisy Daisy bring back Daisy, I don’t usually get into cop characters but WEIRD CRYPTID FORCE COPS are apparently a potential weakness for me (..also I know, I know they are probably Hunt-aligned. I’ve already said I’m unfortunately Weak for The Hunt ).

-I miss Actual!Sasha >:

- Tim is seriously the only person in this whole damn institute with any self preservation either supernatural or normal?? “Yeah you’re right I don’t like the boss who stalks me and keeps secrets about a situation which is directly about my own personal safety like I was the enemy and takes his trauma out on me directly while I’m recovering from,in this case , exactly the same trauma thanks “

Martin: Wow Tim you’re so selfish, how can you even think about fleeing our supernatural hellscape, why aren’t you more concerned with the guy who is very overtly considering you a potential enemy and crossing all boundaries in a way that, in any normal job, would right off be enough to get HR and maybe the cops involved? WHY ARE YOU BEING SO UNREASONABLE, TIM??...Now excuse me while I run to my probable death with no preparation in defense of a guy who seems to go out of his way to hit my very obvious emotional weak points and considered me so useless he thought I might be dead already, because unlike you I am making good decisions!!! LEEEROY JENKINNNSSSSS”

-honestly the apparent connection between why the Institute/Elias accepted Martin as sacrifice an employee and Martin’s emotional Everything is both screamingly apparent and worth an essay all on its own , that’s some Good Charactering

-I never trusted Elia-- Never Trust the Boss Of Shadowy Organization With Mysterious Backers, that’s my motto-- but HE KILLED THE INFODUMP SOURCE. HOW DARE. INSTANT LEAST FAVE.

- I KNEW LEITNER WAS A RESEARCHER I KNEW IT I KNEW IT, who has a vast occult library BUT never really figures in any accounts of actually DOING anything?? AN OCCULT NERD DOING RESEARCH. (I say, well aware that *I* did not do my research as fully as I’d like here, to avoid spoilers, and thus may be forgetting a Big Thing he apparently did)

- I did NOT know he was still alive?? and totally didn’t see him working with Gertrude (it was actually Gert’s Occult Book Hunting that made me slap my head and go OH RIGHT about Leitner!)

-I want to know more about Gertrude

- The OH NO moment I had during Leitner’s description of obvious multiple entities working together to just wreck his shop!! BAD, BAD, THE INJUSTICE LEAGUE OF AAAAAH IS BAD

- also now I know for sure that the Web and the Stranger are enemies? this puts at least 2/3 Fear Entities that could, I am aware , pretty much have me as a pawn for a cheap ice-cream cone allied against the one Entity that makes me absolutely go into Screaming Phobia Murder Mode, I don’t know if everyone’s feeling the same way or if this is just the show happening to find my particular keys like that

-...listen Elias is THE WORRRRSSSST and I am sure The Institute is Not Good but if The Stranger existed and was A Thing like this then they wouldn’t have to Play me to get my assistance on taking it out , every single episode about it makes me go Mad Raccoon in A Box , I want it gone, the enemy of the Stranger is my ...slightly less enemy

-Jonnycakes Sims is the Avatar of the Human Trainwreck, but I did not realize until this episode that he does not drink coffee?? I’m torn between thinking he should and thinking all caffeine should be taken away from him forever.

-Also, Dammit, Jonet, this “keeping info about supernatural horror schemes from my team For Their Own Good” nonsense? BAD , you are not a Victorian patriarch and they are not your children, GIVE THEM A FIGHTING CHANCE YOU GOOBER, DID YOU EVER READ ONE GOTHIC NOVEL, IGNORANCE IS DEATH

- ..HOW DID YOU DECIDE TO SMASH THE TABLE YOU. GOOBER PIE. I take it back, definitely Jonny needs to drink all the more caffeine.

--in conclusion, ELIAS TOOK MY LORE HOOKUP AND HE MUST PAY FOR HIS CRIMES.

(Supplemental:P)

I'm getting the impression, from responses to my earlier little post, that people don't? like Tim ?? and I am Afraid this means he is Something Horrible?? but he's fun and friendly and smart and reacting like a human with normal human self-preservation instincts + a touch of Heroic honestly?? why do people not like Tim, is he a secret Horror, NO DON'T ACTUALLY TELL ME but D: NERVOUS NOW

#TMA natter #long post sorry #also not particularly focused I'm tired and wanting to hear S3 XD

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starlight-parkers · 7 years ago

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Being a Wayne and Dating Peter Paker Would Include:

*gif belongs to spiderling-parker*

Author’s Notes(s): hey cuties! Someone requested this a while ago and I completely forgot that it was in my drafts. Just a side note requests are closed! See my latest post for more info xx

Summary: You just so happen to be dating Peter Parker, but what happens when your freakily overprotective brother’s find out?

Warning(s): swearing and fluff

Being a Wayne and Dating Peter Parker would include:

so like

we all know that the Wayne’s have been through some tough shit

So y’all are really closely knit

That being said, you have four really overprotective brothers who would do anything to stop you from dating.

PsSh

That never stopped you honey ️

So let’s say, you’ve been dating Peter for around a year.

He’s never been to your house or even met your family bc you know™️ he wouldn’t last a second around your brothers

“(Y/N)? Why haven’t I met your family? Don’t you think it’s kinda weird?”

“Peter honey, if you value your life, you won’t ask questions.”

One day his curiosity gets the best of him and he ends up at your address.

Big mistake™️

Curiosity killed the cat bro

Unfortunately for him, you’re not the one who opens the door.

So smol bby boy peter’s quaking in his boots when short stack Damian appears at the door with a scowl on his face.

“Who the fuck are you?”

*in the distance* “Damian don’t fucking swear”

“JASON GOD DAMMIT, DAMI WHOS AT THE DOOR??”

So then Jason, Dick and Dami are all at the door and poor bby Peter kinda stutters out a response.

“Uh hi, I’m peter. (Y/N)’s boyfriend”

LOLOL

Before anyone knew what was happening Damian’s launching himself at Peter who kinda does his spidey thing and backflips into a tree or some shit

And Jay + Dick who are holding Dami back are kinda like wtf

They accidentally let go of their younger brother who’s basically barking up a tree at your almost sobbing boyfriend

And Tim kinda just walks up to the front door with a coffee in hand

Takes one look at the situation

Sips his coffee

And goes back inside bc a bitch ain’t involved

So that’s how Peter met your family.

Dick Grayson:

the nice brother™️

would probably try to suppress his other protective brother mode

would lowkey be the biggest shipper ever

When dick meets peter it’s probably like:

- “oh (Y/N) he’s so cute!!”

- “LoOK at hIM heS adorABle”

Peter doesn’t know whether he should be scared or he should be relieved

Dick totally supervises your dates

Or tries to

He’ll probably be sitting at the back of the cafe you’re in and Peter points him out like

“Uh... M-mr Grayson we can see you”

*face palm*

Probably holds hands with you both after that.

Finds you and peter’s relationship very cute

Sometimes you wonder if he’s the one dating Peter

They’re always on ‘friend dates’

Probably been on more dates with Peter than you have

“Dick buddy, I’m gonna need my boyfriend back”

“You can’t separate us sis, this is true love”

Jason Todd:

the cool brother™️

probably gives the “if you hurt her, I’ll find you talk”

He’ll like, take Peter to his weapons room or something and be like “see this baby here, she’s my favourite. First time I shot right through some guy’s skull”

And you’re just there with rolling eyes like “oh my god Jason”

And poor Peter would be so shook™️

But you’d be all cute holding hands and brushing your fingers over his knuckles to calm him

Jay would gag

You’d get to a particular weapon and Petey would point to it “Natasha has that”

“Natasha as in, the, blackwidow?”

And Peter would look at you with a confused gaze and you’d shrug as he nodded to Jason

Jason would scream™️

Blackwidow fanboy at your service fam

He’d go on regular trips to see the avengers with Peter just to meet Natasha

Would probably cry

He’s really chill after that tbh

Would probably regularly take you and Peter for ice cream

Does not enjoy watching you guys suck face

Pretends to throw up most of the time

“If you guys kiss in front of me one more time I’ll probably die for the second time”

Tim Drake:

The fanboy brother™️

I feel like Tim probably knew you were dating someone he just didn’t know that it was the sPidErMaN

Probably did a whole background check on Peter before he even got to the front door.

He’d be the only brother who’s actually nervous to meet your boyfriend

So before pete even opens his mouth, Tim’s just spewing information about him like

“Peter Benjamin Parker. Age 16”

“Born July 1st, favourite colour blue and -“

“Tim... Tim you’re scaring him”

“Right sorry”

You’d leave for like a brief second to grab a drink and when you come back they’re both nerding out over tech

It’s actually adorable seeing both of your boys getting excited over Peter’s webshooters and stuff

You totally don’t take pictures

On the nights you’d have dates Peter would show up like two hours early just to sit with Tim and talk about Wayne and Tony’s tech

Call it a gossip circle if you will

“Oh hi Petey! I wasn’t expecting you for a little while-“

“Yeah, I’m here to see Tim?”

-_-

Like Jay, I don’t think he’d appreciate you guys’ PDA

he’d probably be fine with it after a few shots of espresso

Damian Wayne:

The intimidating brother™️

First of all, let’s get this straight.

He won’t admit it, but Dami adores you. He loves you more than anything.

As his older sister, you’ve always been there to protect him. You made him feel at home.

So in his mind, Damian basically lives to protect you. He views you as the only pure thing in this world and would do anything to preserve that.

You’ve had your heart broken before and Dami hated to see you go through such a heartbreak

So forgive him for being a little overprotective

Hahaha

Did I say little? I meant a lot

When he first meets Peter, shit hits the fan.

He just doesn’t like the way Peter holds your hand so confidently and tbh he really wants to rip it off.

He does everything he can to deter Peter from dating you but for some reason it’s not working

But he can tell he’s wearing away at Peter

Then one day your boyfriend asks to spar with dami

And you, Tim, Dick and Jay all share a look

So both boys start getting ready to spar and Dami takes it a little more seriously

Peter’s reflexes are much quicker though, since he’s spidey and all so that pisses your younger brother off

so he starts getting angry

Suddenly, it’s not sparing anymore and instead it’s literally peter fending for his life as Damian tries to kill him.

So you scream.

And everyone drops everything and you kinda run off with Peter hot on your heels.

You completely shut down on both of them bc two ppl you really cared about almost hurt each other

Peter shows up at the Manor one day, looking for Dami who almost slams the door shut when he sees your boyfriend

And he’s like “look, I don’t know why you hate me but you mean so much to (Y/N) and I know how much it would mean to her if we got a long, she speaks so highly of you and I just- I want to get to know you.”

And Damian’s like shit, because he doesn’t hate Peter, he never did. He was just scared of losing you to heartbreak again.

“I didn’t hate you, in fact I find you quite um” *struggles to say the word likeable*

“Likeable?”

“No that’s too strong a word”

And Peter just smiled bc even though he won’t admit it, he knows that Damian doesn’t mind him.

Extras:

Never being allowed to go up to your room alone

one of your brothers are always watching.

Always.

The boys will literally freak out if Peter has even onE tiny bruise. They always think it’s a hicky.

“wHaTs wRonG witH yoU (Y/N)??”

“What did I do?”

“I can’t believe you, tainting Peter’s innocence like that”

“OH MY GOD JAY THE BRUISE IS ON HIS LEG HE FELL DOWN THE STAIRS”

At least one of your brothers third wheeling on dates

It’s mostly Dick

They’ll literally hold hands with you guys and sit at the table at restaurants

When you go to the cinema they all wanna sit next to Peter bc apparently you talk too much during movies

The boys waiting outside of school for flash when they find out he’s been bothering Peter

Everyone hanging out in the bat cave to talk about “manly things” when really they’re just gossiping about girls

You totally don’t try and spy on these

It totally doesn’t work rIP

Your brothers have a mental break down when you and Peter get into a fight

They act like you guys are divorced parents

Will do anything in their power to get you back together again

You probably already have tbh

You just like watching them freak out over you guys

Overall you all have a really good relationship

Peter is the first boy you’ve ever loved

And you’re really happy that your brothers like him. It means a lot.

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fleuresdumonde · 2 years ago

Text

I’ve been seriously into molasses lately. Weird sentence, I know. I’m one beer drunk and for a nerd my size it’s actually worth 2.

:readmore:

My story all started years ago when I was introduced to caffeine by social pressure in a government facility I would do viral analysis for as part of an internship (Paid. Minimal wages but paid nonetheless)

Before, I had some coffee there and then but the bitterness was too much for my sugar sweet tastes and, while sleep deprived, the jitters where inconveniencing enough I didn’t take more then a cup a month. At this lab, peoples whose commute took them close to the local Tim’s or McDonald were in charge of getting coffee for the rest of the crew and in thanks they would get more then the price of the coffee for the trouble.

The routines was well oiled, the group was already knit and as a socially awkward college student my only in was to pretend to love coffee as well. (Maybe it wasn’t the only way but I suck at making conversations)

So, I took one coffee everyday for 4 months. The habits of taking coffee every morning was born out of social need to bond with coworkers. Those 15 min before work making small talks. Exchanging moneys and informations about upcoming sales were enough social interactions to make me feel like I would be getting a good grade in work interactions. Something possible and totally normal to want to archive.

I associated the taste of coffee and bitter sweet morning conversations in my brain and couldn’t shake off the caffeine addiction for years. Sometime going into energy drinks territory when the accoutumance would kick in (Monster is the best one and it’s an hill I would die on) Sometime doing 2 weeks “purges” to shake it off and start back with one coffee a day.

Coffee, teas and warm drinks are a piece of human warmth that I could get anytime without having to talk to anyone and it carried me through many sleepless night.

But insomnia always been a genetic risk for me and I soon as I started my coffee breaks I started sleeping less and less.

I had to cut back on coffee for my own good recently but the thing peoples don’t say enough about breaking addictions is that habits are what make us well adjusted humans.

We crave regulars patterns in our lives and people that struggle with establishing them naturally can rely on addictive behaviour to retain normalcy and structure in their life. I know less then a handful of smokers who are not autistic and/or have ADHD. It’s one of the structure you can crave into your brain. It’s so tempting if only to be normal for 15 min every morning.

Where was I going with this? I think I was just going to share that one teaspoon of blackstrap molasses into a cup of boiling water and a cloud of milk taste almost exactly like coffee with a touch of sugar! It’s so good! I’ve been taking it two times a day! I also tried it cold and with some cacao it ’s very good! I don’t know if I’m just craving iron and metallic tastes. But I’m not anemic and my hemoglobin is usually very high for someone AFAB so I don’t think it is? It’s not very bitter but bitter enough to replace coffee. Try it. Y’all deserve it. Bring blackstrap molasses into ur home and ur hearts.

I need to google how to add “read more” in mobile. Didn’t mean to overshare this much. It’s was a stout craft beer if anyone curious

TLDR. I started drinking blackstrap molasses latte instead of coffee to help me overcome the caffeine addiction plaguing my sleep schedule. That’s it. I’m just drunk and wanted to share

0 notes

smartgirlreporting · 6 years ago

Note

All the succulent asks!

burro’s tail: what was the last dream you had? It was weird? And hard to explain? I was working but my keyboard didn’t work so I had to hunt for a new one and each time I found one it broke? I don’t know, it was odd

agave: what’s your favorite time of the day? Just after sunset.

crown of thorns: are you more of a cozy rainy day or a warm sunny day? I prefer cozy rainy days, but I think my personality is closer to a warm sunny day.

sempervivum: what’s your favorite artist to listen to when you’re sad? A mix between Tim McGraw and George Straight; they were my moms favorite singers.

jade plant: what is a bird you associate yourself with? Oo, I’m not sure… I’m not big on birds so I don’t really know how similar I am to any of them. I’ve always loved doves though!

aloe: what is your favorite season and why? Autumn! I love the just cold enough for sweaters but not cold enough for heavy jackets feeling. And pumpkin patches are so great!

pussy ears: how do you take your coffee? Three creamers, two sugars.

ponytail palm: what is your favorite flavor of macaron and ice cream? Macaron: strawberries and creme Ice cream: cherry vanilla!

perle von nurnberg: what makes your heart flutter? This is so sappy, but when Romeo smiles? It’s like I can see flowers blooming and I can’t help but smile too? And it’s not just a flutter, it’s like my heart does flips. (Really anything he does makes my heart flutter but his smile especially.)

moonstones: do you have a significant other? Yes, and he’s the absolute best. I couldn’t ask for anyone better.

agavoides: what is your first plant you ever owned and does it have a name? It was a mint sprig named Richard Campbell Gansey the Fourth (listen, I’m a nerd, and Gansey had my heart for a solid month after I read the Raven Cycle the first time.)

cupid: what are five aspects you like about yourself? My determination, my dedication, …my writing? I can’t think of any others, sorry.

flapjack what are five flaws you have? My naivety, my inability to cook, my stubbornness, my insomnia, and my occasional irrational anger.

string of pearls: do you prefer soft pastels, warm neutrals, or cool darks? Soft pastels!

lavender stones: what do you look for in your significant other? Someone who cares about me and supports my work. (Bonus points if you cook, all the points if you’re Romeo because he’s all of these and more.)

black prince: are there any pets you would like to have? Lucy!! I love her so much, she loves cuddling up with me and she’s everything I could’ve asked for in a pup.

melaco: how would you describe a perfect date? I mean? Any date where we both have fun and are together is perfect?

wooly rose: what are some names that you like? All of these have personal connections to them, so I like them for those reasons, but: Darcy, William, Gulliver, Lillian, Ann Marie, and Katherine (the OG, my mom)

haworthia: are a you more of a fruit popsicle kind of person or ice cream popsicle kind of person? This just reminded me how long it’s been since I had a fruit popsicle… But ice cream, I think?

lithops: how do you spend free time by yourself? Working, usually. If I have the time to pamper myself, I’ll take a long bath with a soak of some sort and put on my favorite PJs and a face mask, then sit and drink a strawberry banana smoothie while watching Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Haven’t done it in a while though.

aeonium: what is your favorite tea and how do you take it? Earl Grey, three sugars. Green, three sugars and a touch of honey. And one of my coworkers makes this awesome mint tea that I just drink straight.

baby toes: what was the last book you read? Children of Blood and Bone by Tomi Adeyemi

topsy turvy: what is the most comfortable sleeping position? Curled up cuddling with either Romeo or Crutchie, or a pillow as a close second if neither of them are available.

calico kitten: what is something valuable that you learned in your life? Be kind. Always.

cactus: how would you describe the last photo you’ve taken? Mmmmm This is the worst description ever but it’s a selfie of me looking up at the clouds and the imminent rain with the LEAST excited expression ever.

irish mint: do you like to cook or bake more? Neither because I burn everything. (Although now I can almost make waffles… Does that count as cooking or baking?)

blue elf: do you have a favorite scent? Depends on the day I think. I’ve always been a sucker for fresh ink though. Blame the writer in me.

jelly bean: do you prefer walking, driving, or biking? Walking! I love it.

california sunset: what accessory do you always have on you, no matter what? Crutchie got me this bracelet for my birthday and I wear it literally every day.

little jewel: are you an art museum or a science museum kind of person? Both? Can I have both?

painted lady: do you have cute nicknames? … I mean, depends on what ‘cute’ means? They’re all just nicknames to me and each has its own backstory.

debbie: how would you describe your handwriting? Very loopy. So many loops where there doesn’t need to be. Why do I like loops?

moonglow: how do you relieve stress? See: lithops

key lime: do you have a quirky catch phrase? I have a tendency to say “yeah, o-kay.” a lot, but I don’t know if it’s a catchphrase?

lola: do you play any instruments? if not, are there any you wish you could play?I don’t! I was fascinated by the guitar as a kid, but I never had the chance to learn it.

#long post //#romo //#uh #ask to tag?

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itsthebats · 7 years ago

Text

Soulmates

It's Valentine's Day, and Jason and Tim are doing a questionnaire to see who knows more about the other.

AO3

Jason’s kissing Tim when he suddenly stops.

They are in Jason’s house, and they are making out and it’s almost three in the morning when Tim sputters, “Wait!”

Jason jumps like three feet away, startled, and looks at Tim as he sits straight and closes his eyes for a second and then opens them in this creepy way that says he’s got a bad idea Jason’s not going to like. Tim says, “Today I was with Steph, and we were talking about Valentine’s Day, you know.”

“Ugh,” Jason mutters, because they tried. Tim sneaked out in Jason’s house—Jason thought he was a robber and almost shot him—to make Jason cookies, though Tim burnt them and instead of adding sugar he added salt, so they couldn’t eat them. Jason bought him flowers, but walking home someone tried to rob him and the flowers ended up kind of dead. And when they were seeing a movie on the TV and were about to kiss—at least they had that—they turned their heads at the same time and Tim somehow hit Jason in the nose, and Jason’s nose started bleeding. So after the bleeding stopped, they went to the bed and tried to sleep until Tim kissed Jason’s neck and they started making out again, this time successfully. Until now, at least.

“But it’s not anything difficult,” Tim says, smiling. Jason rolls his eyes, and Tim punches him lightly on the shoulder. “We were talking about what we were going to do, and I told her that I was going to come and make you cookies and—”

“Yeah, yeah, go on.”

“Okay, so she told me that a magazine she likes to read—”

“Oh no.”

Tim’s smile gets bigger, and Jason prepares himself for the worst. “There was this questionnaire to see how much you know about your girlfriend or boyfriend. So, she told me that we should totally try to do it.”

Jason looks at him in the eye, tries to think of all the ways this could go wrong—technically, it’s not the 14th anymore so their bad luck has passed, but it could still go wrong: maybe one of them don’t know one really important thing about the other and that messes up their relationship, or maybe they know something the other’s not supposed to know and their relationship ends up messed up anyway.

But it can be fun too, and Jason’s not one to back away from a challenge—this is some kind of challenge, right?—so, what the hell.

“All right, let’s do it,” he says, and Tim gets his phone.

“She texted me the questions,” he mumbles, scrolling down his screen. He sticks his tongue out, and Jason cant’s help but think that he would have preferred to keep kissing him, but whatever. “Okay, I got them. There’re twenty questions. This says that if you answer at least ten correctly, you know a fairly amount of things about your partner, but if you answer more than fifteen, you’re soulmates.”

“You know that’s bullshit, right?”

“Yeah,” Tim says, putting a strand of his hair behind his ear, “but it’s fun. Do you want to start?”

“Okay, but know that I’m going to know everything about you.”

Tim snorts. “You don’t even know everything about yourself.”

“Hey!” he complains, kicking him. Tim laughs. “Stop talking and let’s see who knows more.”

“All right. So.” He reads the question and laughs to himself. “How many boyfriends or girlfriends have I had before?”

“That’s easy,” Jason says, counting in his head. Okay, so, there’s Stephanie, obviously, and… that’s it, right? Or maybe… there was this girl, Lucius Fox’s daughter, but Jason doesn’t think they were together-together. No, wait, wait, Zoanne something, Tim was with her for a while. Two, then?

“I’m waiting,” Tim says, smirking, and Jason kinda wants to punch the smirk off his face.

“Shut up,” Jason says, still thinking. Okay, two then, three counting Jason. Tim doesn’t look like the guy who’s had many partners. That’s it, three. “Three.”

Tim laughs, and Jason curses. “No! I can’t believe you failed the first one. And I’ve told you about them!”

“How many, then?”

“Four! Steph, Zoanne, Ariana, and you.”

Ariana? “Who’s Ariana?”

“Ariana Dzerchenko,” Tim says, as if Jason had a clue. He rolls his eyes and adds, “We were together for a bit. But it didn’t work out. You still have nineteen left, don’t worry. My turn. How many girlfriends or boyfriends have you had? Um… okay, that’s difficult. You’re always bragging about how many people you’ve been with, so it’s kind of impossible to guess. Ten?”

Now it’s Jason’s turn to laugh, because oh boy does he have it wrong. “You think you’re so fucking clever,” he says, smirking, and Tim’s smile goes away immediately. “One, genius. I’ve only been with you.”

Tim opens his mouth, and he only says, “No.”

Jason rolls his eyes, but he’s smiling. “I’ve messed around with a boy or two,” he says, shrugging, “but I’ve never had a boyfriend. That’s 0-0.”

“Whatever,” Tim says, pouting. Jason leans on and presses a kiss to his lips, and Tim’s smiling again. “Next one: what’s something I do that I wish I didn’t?”

That’s really easy. “You bite your nails.”

“True. Okay, you pull your hair when you’re nervous.”

“Riiight,” Jason mutters, because he doesn’t like to be reminded of that. “1-1.”

“What are the last two books I’ve read?”

“Pfft. Try harder, you always leave your books around when you’re reading them. Confessions, from Rousseau, and Memoirs of Martinus Scriblerus, from Alexander Pope, you nerd.”

“That was easy. And don’t call me a nerd, because the last two books you’ve read are Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban and How to kill a Mockingbird. Neeerd.”

“Shut up, next question.”

Tim sticks out his tongue at him, and Jason cannot help thinking that he looks like a kid with the blue shorts and sleeveless, white shirt he’s wearing. He looks like someone who has just come back from the gym.

“Who’s someone I like but don’t want anyone to know I like them?”

“You love Kim Kardashian.”

Tim groans loudly, and Jason smirks. “That’s not something you’re supposed to know,” he moans, dragging a hand down his face.

Jason shrugs. “Told ya, I know everything.”

“Anyway, you like Bruce.” Jason shakes his head, but it’s kinda true, even though he won’t admit it out loud, not now, not ever. “We’re 3-3. Next question is: what’s the weirdest thing I’ve done while I was drunk?”

“You ate dog food because Conner said you wouldn’t dare.”

“Oh my god,” he moans, and Jason has to hug his stomach because of how hard he’s laughing. “Don’t remind me of that. Ugh. I was sick for an entire week.”

“I still have the video,” Jason says proudly. “Now, what’s the weirdest thing I’ve done?”

“You put on your Red Hood helmet, got to the GCPD rooftop and shouted ‘Fuck Batman’ and then shot the bat-signal.”

“Oh boy, I didn’t remember that. But nope. That’s not the weirdest thing.”

Tim’s jaw hangs open. “What.”

“I put on the Batman cowl—I was wearing my pajamas—went to the GCPD and shouted that Batman was gay. Then I walked to Gordon and told him, ‘I’d be careful if I were you’ and laughed really hard. Someone ordered to arrest me, so I started shooting at the ceiling until I got out and then I don’t even remember. I think I passed out somewhere and Dick picked me up because I woke up in his apartment.”

“Oh my god.”

“Yeah.”

“Jason.”

“I gave up drinking for a while after that.”

“Oh my god,” Tim repeats, looking at him in awe.

Jason smiles and points at the phone. “Go on, go on. I’m winning.”

“You’re so weird,” Tim mutters, but then he asks, “If I started a cult, what kind of cult would I start—what the hell, what kind of question’s this?”

“What kind of magazines does Stephanie read?” Jason thinks of something Tim loves, and less than two seconds after that he answers, “A coffee cult. You’d make drinking coffee instead of water a rule.”

Tim giggles, and says, “Fair point. And you, you’d start a cult against clowns. An anti-clowns cult.”

“Yeah, probably. 4-5, and I’m still winning. How many are left?”

“A lot. Okay—oh my god, all right. Um. What’s my favorite superhero?”

“Sheesh. That’s a hard one. I’ll say… Batman.”

“That was an easy one.” Tim lets the phone away and lies down, his head on Jason’s lap. He yawns and then says, “Yours is Wonder Woman.”

“She’s my girl crush.”

“You don’t even like girls,” Tim says, looking up at him, and Jason pinches his cheek.

“Next one.”

“Who’s the nicest person I’ve ever met in my life?”

And after a beat, they both answer at the same time: “Dick.”

They laugh, and Jason says, “He’s just a sweetheart.”

“He’s good,” Tim agrees, closing his eyes. “But this has nothing to do with us. I mean, what kind of questionnaire is this?”

“A shitty one,” Jason answers, running his fingers through Tim’s hair. “I’m still winning. Heh.”

“Shut up.” Tim opens his eyes, looks at the screen and smirks. “This one’s easy. When’s my birthday?”

“Fuck, Tim,” Jason says, and Tim starts laughing because he knows damn well that Jason cannot remember dates. The only dates he has never forgotten are his birthday and the day he died, and apart from that he can’t remember anything—not birthdays or anniversaries or anything that has to do with dates, he’s so bad at it. “You know—”

“Yeah, yeah, you don’t remember my birthday. I should be sad, but I’m happy because now we’re even.”

“Oh, yeah? Then when’s my birthday?”

Tim rolls his eyes, waits a second and says, “August 16th.”

“Damn it.”

Tim whoops. “Yes! 7-7.”

“Okay, listen, I’m tired,” Jason mutters, and Tim looks at him with a smug look; Jason punches him in the shoulder, and Tim laughs. “One more question. The question to end all questions. The one who answers it correctly wins.”

“What if we both answer it correctly?”

“Then we are really soulmates. Now, read the question.”

“The question to end all questions,” Tim repeats, grinning. “What’s the most awkward situation I’ve ever been on? No, no, wait. Let me answer this one first.”

“Go on then, you little shit.”

“You were at the manor because you’d been intoxicated with the Scarecrow’s gas, and you were in the kitchen, sat on the island, eating chocolate cookies Alfred made. Bruce walked in and saw you and you were so, so drugged and you told him, ‘You’re the most fucked up dad ever,’ and then you went to him, put a cookie into his mouth, hugged him and said, ‘But you’re the only one I’ve ever had, so I don’t hate you too much.’ That’s your awkward moment.”

Jason cringes, because remembering that moment is painful. Bruce told Dick what happened, and then Dick told Jason, and Jason wanted to die again just because he knew Dick wasn’t going to let him forget that ever. Every time they meet, Dick somehow finds a way to bring that up. Every. Time. It’s awful.

“Well. My turn. The most awkward situation you’ve ever been on was when you were at this meeting with Bruce and you burped really loudly and everyone just shut up and looked at you and Bruce didn’t talk to you for a week.”

Tim winces, then smiles, and he painfully shakes his head. And when he opens his eyes is when Jason knows he’s fucked up. “That was awkward, but it’s not the most awkward situation I’ve been in.”

“Come on!”

“Sorry, Jay. You lose. I win. Boom, baby. I’m the best boyfriend ever.”

“Yeah, whatever, cowboy. But what’s the awkward situation?”

Tim flushes, and Jason now knows that he must know what the awkward situation is. Tim sits and mumbles, “But it’s very awkward.”

“Spit it out, Timmy.”

Tim sighs. “Okay. So. I’d been with Bruce for almost six months, and we were working in this really difficult case, and I discovered something relevant, so I went looking for Bruce. I heard something in his room, and my twelve-year-old-self thought, ‘He’s working out for sure!’ and I, um. I opened the door without knocking, and he—”

“Oh my god.”

“Selina was there, and they—”

“I don’t believe you.”

“I couldn’t even move, I just stared at them from the door, and they didn’t even notice I was there—”

“Tim,” Jason says, and he’s too shocked to even laugh.

“I heard Selina purr and I was so—it was so weird and I didn’t even know what to do. And then Alfred passed by and saw me and screamed, and then Selina and Bruce realized that I was there and screamed too, and it was super awkward—”

“Are you traumatized?”

“As a matter of fact, yes,” Tim says, and that’s when Jason laughs. It’s an honest to god laugh, and Tim smiles and keeps telling, “They made me sit with them in the living room and asked me if I was okay and if I needed to talk and I was like. No. Leave me alone. But they didn’t leave me alone and I could tell Bruce was dying of embarrassment, and Selina was trying her best not to jump from the window. I swear to god, I will never forget that moment.”

Jason barks another laugh, and Tim tries to put his hands in Jason’s mouth to make him shut up, but it’s pointless because there’s nothing that can make Jason stop laughing after this. He can’t believe that Tim has never told him that, but he also understands him, and oh god, he’s never going to forget this.

“I won, though,” Tim says, and even though Jason is a bit disappointed that he didn’t win, he’s fine because he discovered something new about Tim.

He looks at the clock, and it’s almost five in the morning. He yawns, and Tim yawns too, and this time when Jason leans on to kiss him, the kiss lasts longer and it’s deeper and Jason thinks that he really likes being alive. He smiles, and he feels Tim smile too, and when Tim cups his face with his hands, Jason remembers the flowers and salty cookies and he feels like the luckiest person alive.

“Happy Valentine’s day,” he whispers, and then he pulls Tim closer.

And closer and closer and closer.

#jason todd #tim drake #jaytim #dick selina bruce alfred and stephanie are mentioned #theres fluff #and theres a lot of comedy #jasons gay in this one #theres a lot of dialogue #and its a bit ooc #but whatever #noah writes #dc

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howardlinkedin · 8 years ago

Text

Group Project: Part 7

Running Title: Group Project. Part 7 (End) Part 6: Here Sequel to Shelter Summary: A family can’t be a team, because with teams, there’s always a winner or a loser. With family, there are no losers. That’s what Timothy Walker believes anyway.

Lala’s song is “Not Alone” by Otto Knows.

Link looked from their pets, to the exotic plant, to his children enjoying lunch at the counter. Timcampy was a wheezing delight at his human doppelgänger’s feet, as they boy kept sneaking the dog bits of food. Which, thought the father, the son did not need to sneak at all, seeing as Allen had been spoiling the canine rotten with human food since the day Cross dropped into Allen young arms.

Lala was absentmindedly petting Atuuda between her lunch and reading a book. The cat purred, contented at yet another human to shower her with attention.

Rosemary the Man Eating Plant, which really was just a title given to her by Toukusa all those years ago (and it stuck), well. Link just fed her a rat, so he assumed the unconventional houseplant was happy.

“Allen.”

“Hmm?” Allen shoved another sandwich into his mouth, looking at his husband.

“We have five.”

---

Lala and Timothy watched their Dad almost choke on his food, laughing up a storm. Their Papa looked downright smug.

“Adults are weird.” Said Tim.

Lala nodded. “I concur.”

---

When Timothy was seven and a half, he was abandoned on the doorstep of Hearst’s Orphanage in the middle of a cold December night, by a father who never loved him.

He was as bitter as the wind at the time.

Fast forward two years later, and Timothy gained two fathers at the same time, who will never stop loving him.

Or his sister. Or each other.

He may be young, but Timothy was observant. He saw a lot of love in his family, even he was too unwilling to outright admit it at times.

But what makes a family?

---

Cross walked into his office, late as usual, coffee in hand, only to almost spit it all over himself.

Set smack dab in the middle of the room was a brightly colored, obnoxious standee of his brat.

“What the fucking fuck?” The police officer choked.

A tell-tale jingle appeared down besides him, and the redhead looked down to see his grandson, shaking his swear jar expectedly.

“No.”

“Yes.”

“Why the he-eck are you here?!” It hurt to correct himself, but damn if Cross didn’t want to lose anymore money, and stuffed the damn jar with a dollar (just in case).

Placated, the boy answered, “Dad dropped me off, saying we needed to bond.”

Marian Cross could practically hear his brat’s cackle from wherever the hell he was.

---

“Let’s go bother the nerds in Forensics.”

“Will I get to see a dead body?” “Probably. Don’t tell your parents.”

---

Once, just once, a cameraman tried to bother their way into getting a surprise picture and scoop of Allen and Lala.

The father and daughter just left Anita’s cafe, and the instant Allen saw the flash, he was on the nosey man in a second.

“Hello! I understand that you are only trying to do your job, but could you please not do that?” Greeted the singer, all smiles and blatant charm. The would be photographer was dazed, then aghast to discover that Allen had use his left hand to crunch the camera into a pieces.

“What the hell beansprout?” Kanda groused from the cafe door, looking as menacing and as Kanda as ever. Lala had retreated back into the shop to grab her father’s friend, just incase. Said girl was hiding behind the long haired man, peeking behind his arm and glare at the interloper.

The cameraman began to sputter while Allen whipped his head around to give his friend a scathing look. “It’s ALLEN.”

“Che.” Kanda turned his steel gaze at the stranger, which if the cameraman knew Kanda, they would know that this was Kanda’s usual expression. “Go away.”

Not needing to be told twice, the stranger scampered away, crushed camera and all.

This kind of incident never happened again.

---

Since leaving France with his new family, Timothy had kept in contact with the Head Mother who cared for him during his stay at the orphan home.

They both emailed back and forth, sharing stories and the nonsense that often happens from having a diverse family or running a home for children.

“Dear Mother Hearst,” he would always begin, because if there was one thing she had taught him, it was manners.

“I have learned something really important, and I want to tell you about it.”

---

“Afternoon Colonel.” Greeted Weever, eyes weary.

Cross huffed around his unlit cigarette. “Don’t give me that look, I’m just here to see the new evidence.”

“Right.” the assistant forensics chief sighed and headed toward the evidence table, about to explain what had been and had not been concluded.

Except Assistant Gill decided to scream and pass out on the ground. Komui, being the good boss that he was, had kicked the rolling surgical table out of the way, less Gill would have had a very nasty fall.

On the body table, half covered by a film sheet, was a grinning ten year old, who was very much alive.

Cross pointed and laughed like the hooligan he was.

“Why is there a child in the surgery lab?!” Yelled Weever. “Cross!” He pointed accusingly.

The man in question was leaning on a deck, wheezing like his kid’s damned dog. “Just-” he gasped, and more laughter. “Let me have this moment.”

After the terror of the forensics lab left, ten year old hefted like a grinning sack of flour, Komui looked at his chief assistant. “That was funny.”

“No it was NOT!”

---

“Daddy.” Lala tugged her father’s white hair to get his attention. Looking upside down at his daughter from the grand piano, Allen grinned. “What’s up?”

He noticed right away she was red in the face, and pinching her fingers together. Usually, this meant that Lala had become very shy, despite being a very blunt young lady.

“There’s a song.” She mumbled, then looked cross at herself for it and tried again louder. “There’s a song I want to write. But I don’t know,” she tapered off, almost quite. “How.”

Allen jumped up from the piano bench and engulfed his daughter in a hug, almost lifting her off feet off the ground. Almost, because as she was just mere centimeters away from his height.

She squeaked, caught off guard. “Daddy!”

“Let’s go see Miranda.” Allen said, elated and fond all at once. He knew exactly what to do.

---

He had once asked Mother Hearst what a family was, nose scrunched and mouth petulant. He was far from the only child at the Home, and all of them continuously went about wanting a family.

Timothy had no idea what that was. So he never asked for it.

“Family holds different meaning for everyone.” Hearst had answered, smoothing his wild hair back. “You will simply just have to find out what yours is.” She tweaked his nose and he blew a raspberry at her in annoyance.

Now, though, Timothy thinks he knows.

“You see, lots of people keep saying a family is a team, like in books and movies and stuff. But that can’t be right because teams usually mean there’s a competition and there’s gonna be a loser.

But, like, with a family there aren’t any losers. There shouldn’t be anyway.”

---

Alma sprawled over their couch, flipping through what they thought were old photo albums overhead. Upon further inspection, they realized it was one of Kanda’s scrapbooks. “Yuu, did you know your books are mixed with the albums?”

“What?” Kanda poked his head from the hall, tying his hair in a topknot. His eyes widened at what exactly Alma was looking through. “No shit, put that away!”

Face turning impish, Alma began flipping through the pages with more intent. “Why, what are you hiding?” “Nothing! Put it down!”

Kanda stomped over, but was too late for a red piece of paper to slip through the pages and land onto Alma’s face. Their husband snached it away and hid it behind his back. Alma blinked. “Was that-”

“No.”

“Yuu.”

Grumbling and pink nosed, Kanda showed them.

A bit stunned, Alma gaped. It was the valentine heart from second grade! “Yuu, we both go zeroes on that!”

“Yeah.”

“It was a group project!”

“Yeah.”

“You said it got thrown away!”

“Yeah.”

It was well preserved, if not a little gaudy with all the decorations and glued on glitter. It had looked like a masterpiece in second grade, regardless.

“Why?” Alma asked, confused. They were also a mix of amusement and exasperation.

Kanda mumbled and glared at the wall.

“Yuu, I can’t hear you.”

“BECAUSE,” he shouted, then realized his tone and tried again. “It was your heart.”

---

Alma thoroughly kissed Kanda stupid into bed faster than a blink that evening.

They were so very lucky to have this marshmallow of a husband.

---

With the start of his children entering school, Link took it upon himself to join the PTA. It was the duty of a parent to help out at their child’s school, and to stay up-to-date on the events there.

For some reason, all of the mothers there kept giving him food to bring home.

“They think you’re a hot single dad.” Allen teased over the phone. He was away at yet another interview. “Trying to win your heart with their cooking.”

Link gave the tupperware of green bean casserole a frown. Suddenly, the food was menacing. He’ll just feed it to Rosemary.

“Lala’s recital is coming up.” Link decided to change the subject.

“Yeah! How is she? Is she excited? Nervous? I’m coming home in another two days!” Allen rambled and exclaimed. “Hey is she there?”

Wordlessly, Link handed off the phone to their daughter. “Yes.” she answered for herself.

“Lala!”

Timothy leached himself at his Papa’s side. “Me next, me next!”

---

Looking around the bare walls of his new classroom, newly graduated Exceptional Student Services teacher Kanda Yuu frowned. Well. More than usual.

He didn’t know the first thing about setting up a classroom.

Okay, so he had an idea. But where to start?

Alma busied themselves with unpacking his boxes of supplies. “Don’t worry. I called for backup.”

“Backup?” Kanda narrowed his eyes. “What backup?”

Suddenly Alma had yards of fabric in their hands and Kanda felt nervous.

The door burst open and in walked Chaoji, two drink carriers in hand. “Hello, I’m. Well.” He laughed nervously. “Alma said you’d need help.”

“Oy, oy little brother, this desk is shit. I’m gonna fix it.” Next thing Kanda knew, Diasya was there with a tool box. “Daisya what the fuck.”

Link walked in with a stack of baked goods and a blue haired child. Behind was the beansprout and Lenalee.

Kanda pointed at Allen. “No. Not this one.”

“Up yours Kanda.”

“I’ll shove this pencil sharpener so far up your-”

Somehow, the room got set up and decorated to fit the needs to middle school students. But not before Allen and Kanda got into a paint fight.

---

“In school, we have to sometimes do group projects. I think family is like that.”

---

Sometime during the school year, Link was unable to pick them up and Allen was away at a recording, and the city had an emergency that kept Cross unavailable.

Long story short, despite having a myriad of other people who could have come to pick them up that day, it was a strange man in a limousine, who was somehow on their school contact list (even though both children had never heard of him before) and allowed to sign them out from school.

“Call me great grandpa.” He giddied.

To which both children gave a blunt, “No.”

Lala ushered Timothy to the crosswalk while the weird man sobbed on the ground. They could just walk to the bakery.

After handing out the last of large order, Link was surprised to see his kids walk into the shop. He blinked, then frowned. “Your...Allen had called for Neah to get you. Where is he?”

Lala squinted. “Who?” “What’s a Neah?” Asked Tim, also squinting. Was it the weird crying man?

The door rammed open, a different man than the one who had come for them huffing with an enraged look on his face. “I’M NEAH.”

All three Walkers stared at the man as he roared in the entrance. “That old man fucking shoved me in the CLOSET AND TOOK OFF!”

---

Lala and Timothy gained a Neah that day, and somehow a great grandfather that they never knew about.

Though, being family meant that little Timothy could exploit the menacing looking man.

“Quarter.”

---

After a long shift at work, Anita laid on Cross’ couch and set her feet in his lap, exhausted. On autopilot, the man began to knead and rub her feet.

She groaned and threw her arm over her eyes. “I love you.”

“I know.” The Colonel said, smug.

Just for that, Anita shoved her foot against his face.

---

“Everyone gets a job in the group, and we all have to work together to make something. And it can’t be a group unless there’s at least two people.

Sometimes there’s like, five or more though.

Family is like that. It’s made by people who work together.

It’s a group project!”

---

The night of Lala’s recital, many PTA mothers were heartbroken to find that handsome Mister Walker was not a single father.

Their husband was just as handsome in his own right, even with the shocking white hair.

Timothy thought his Dad looked weird with the fake glasses, but whatever. He understood that Allen needed to disguise himself, otherwise people would disturb the show, wanting an autograph or sneak a picture.

Of course, Lala sang beautifully.

---

It’s a long, long way to a miracle, Just to let you know,

You’re not alone.

---

Allen smiled at his son, who was attempting mouth the words to Lala’s song. He looked up at his husband who looked just as proud has he felt.

The music around them bowed and flowed in the air, and if he could see it, Allen knew it would be gleaming.

Ping, ping, ping went a piano, and Allen found himself no longer admiring the flood of music. There was no piano on stage, just Lala and her voice.

His ears tickled and Allen looked around the room. He knew that sound.

Noticing a familiar silhouette by the theater windows, Allen felt his heart go to his throat.

The memory beamed and waved. And when Allen blinked back the water in his eyes, it was gone.

“Allen?” Link asked. “What is it?”

The singer cleared his throat, “Nothing.” He turned to his husband and curious son, face splitting from the joy in his smile. “I remembered something, that’s all.”

---

It's a long long way to miracle But I promised my soul that I'll make it back home.

---

“That’s what I think a family is.

Also, Mother Hearst, you’re part of it too. Thank you for being the first person in my family.

Love you, and junk. Timothy.”

---

“Mother? What is it?”

The older nun sent the email to the printer, tears running down her warm face. “Don’t worry dear. I just need to wash my face.”

What a lovely beginning.

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batfam-imagines · 8 years ago

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What would a pregnant Batmom be like?

A pregnant Batmom wouldbe totally chill. She wouldn’t really be worried about the baby or herself. Shemight have a few weird cravings but not too many, and she only has morningsickness for a little while.

It’s everyone else thatfreaks the hell out.

Bruce panics when shestarts getting sick, before they know she’s pregnant, and immediately takes herto see Leslie. When he finds out that she’s pregnant he tries to do everythingfor her.

“Sweetheart, don’t bend over you might fall!”

“Bruce I’m only 8 weeks,I’m not even showing yet”.

“Honey, sit down, I canget the remote”

“Babe, it’s sitting onthe coffee table”.

“Do you need anything toeat, are you having any cravings? I can go get you something”

“Bruce, I’m 12 weeks, noI don’t want anything, if I did I would get up and get it”

“But …”

“You’re stressing meout, that’s not good for the baby, if I need help I’ll let you know”.

Basically Bruce would drive Batmom insane all pregnancy with hishovering. All of the kids came to him when they were older, so he’s never beenaround a pregnant person before. He goes online and looks up everything thatcould possible go wrong, and that only makes him panic more.

-----

Dick is ecstatic about the prospect of a new baby; he’s hoping it’s agirl. He would be pretty chill about it, there were quite a few pregnant peoplein the circus when he was growing up, so he doesn’t really panic. He’s the onewho goes shopping with Batmom and Alfred. Dick will be around more often inorder to help Batmom defend herself against the other overprotective men in theWayne household.

-----

Jason would be almost asbad as Bruce. When he was on the street he saw first had the complications thatpregnancy can have. So when he finds out that Batmom is pregnant he is terrifiedthat something will happen to her. He refuses to let her go into the Batcave,he says that being at the computer when everyone is on patrol will stress herout too much.

“Mom you need to relax,too much stress isn’t good for you”

“Mom, why haven’t youand Bruce moved downstairs yet?! What if you fall!?”

“Jason, calm down …”

“I don’t want you to gethurt. What would we do without you?”

Batmom would let Jason fuss over her. Mainly because Jason’s version offussing is just making sure that she sits still, and relaxes. And when she isrelaxing, Jason will be too.

-----

Tim, being the nerd he is, does all of the research. He is the one tofind the best furniture, the cutest cloths, and to research every part of thepregnancy. He keeps a chart on how big the baby is on the fridge. Tim alsodesigns a high tech baby monitoring system in order to prevent SIDS. WE ends upselling it after the baby is born, it’s a hit. Tim isn’t calm unless he’sworking, so he makes sure to help Bruce prepare for any situation.

-----

Damian ends up helpingJason keep Batmom safe. He tries to keep Bruce away from her once he realizesthat his father is stressing out his Ummi. Damian makes sure that she wants fornothing, and that nothing can hurt her. If Damian had his way, he would put herin a bubble.

Jason and Damian end up bonding over their protectiveness of Batmom, andthey two of them are unbearable. When they try to keep her in the house for thefull 9 months, she threatens to leave Gotham, and not come back until after thebaby is born. They give her a little more space after that, but Batmom can’treally be mad at any of her boys for very long.

-----

As Batmom’s pregnancyprogresses she lets the boys dote on her a little bit more. Mainly because shereally can’t bend over at this point to put on her shoes. When Harley finds outabout the pregnancy she kidnaps Batmom in order to throw a baby-shower. Harleygives her tips about pregnancy (because Harley has had a kid before, I recentlyfound out about that). Harley is really excited, she invites Poison Ivy, and Catwomanto the party as well.

When they rest of the Batfamilyfinally find her they are frantic, they had searched the entire city, and hadgone back to the cave in order to regroup. They find the four women sitting inthe dining room, drinking tea and snacking with Alfred. They had all made apact a long time ago, when Batmom first married Bruce, to never reveal hissecret identity, or the identity of the boys.

Harley comes to theManor a lot more as Batmom get further in her pregnancy. She’s even there when Batmomgives birth. Everyone notices that the longer Harley is away from the Joker,the calmer she is, the less violent she is. The rest of the Batfamily stilldoesn’t trust her, but they also don’t immediately try to send her back toArkham.

I added the last part about Harley, just because!

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yumikat · 8 years ago

Text

rip here we go bois. was tagged by @kwamimusings (yeh bud) i’m very canadian so i changed all the “favorite”s to “favourite”

Rules: Answer the 20 questions and tag 20 like 2 because i’m lazy amazing followers you’d like to get to know better!

Name: let’s go with Yumi

Nicknames: see above. idk y’all can make nicknames or smth??

Zodiac Sign: gemini

Height: 6′4″-ish

Orientation: i sexually identify as an attack helicopter (jk i’m straight)

Ethnicity: chinese

Favourite Fruit: i would kill a man for an orange slice. vitamin c flows through my veins.

Favourite Season: winter. snow. yes.

Favourite Book: ohhhh boy. i will still have to say the original pjato series, though harry potter and lunar chronicles are really good.

Favourite Flower: what.

Favourite Scent: this will sound weird but i like the scent of my friends. also butter frying smells reaaaaally good

Favourite animals: cattens are life. though wolves and marine life are pretty cool too.

Coffee, Tea, or Hot Cocoa: sauce me my tim hortons iced capp

Cat or Dog Person: did i say i love cattens because cats are my life

Favourite Fictional Character: there’s a lot of those. let’s go with homestuck characters - tz, dave, vriska, roxy are up there.

Dream Trip: ??? uhhh hiking the lotr scenery in new zealand or driving up to the northern territories to stargaze with mes amis

Blog Created: octoberish 2015?

Number of Followers: 134

What I Post About: whatever’s on my dash + my art. (typically homestuck, voltron, ml, and dumb posts)

Do I get asks on a regular basis: naw son

Aesthetic: stuff that is aesthetic is like really nicely lit photography with good contrast levels, but my aesthetic is like idk neons/pastels/rainbows and crap. i guess idk.

Hogwarts House: HUFFLEPUFF PRIDE!!!!! WE HAVE NEWT AND WE’RE BETTER THAN YOU

right so i wasn’t sure if i was supposed to do the next part but i’ll just put a cut right here because it’s getting long

Rules: Write 92 rules about yourself, then tag 25 people. who even knows 25 people

LAST ___:

Drink: watermelon juice at a hot pot place Phone Call: probably my mom????? Text message: i don’t have a phone but last IM thing would be a group chat with some girls from church Song you listened to: no idea let’s say the heathers soundtrack Time you cried: i teared up for logan

HAVE YOU EVER ____: Dated someone twice: “Kinda need to date someone once to do it twice.” -aaron Been cheated on: “Again, kinda need to have ever been in a relationship in order to be cheated on.” -aaron Kissed someone and then regretted it: “Can’t regret it if you’ve never kissed anyone. (Insert picture of guy tapping his temple here)” -aaron (haha single squad) Lost someone special: no, luckily Been depressed: i don’t get affected by much so no Gotten drunk and thrown up: i’m. underage.

LIST THREE FAVOURITE COLOURS: turquoise is a blessing to this planet, maroon is pre nice, black is the colour of my soul but it doesn’t count, so there are certain shades of pink that are pretty nice, even though i’m a non-conformist.

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU _____: Made new friends: ya bud new girl in the ib fam and some kool kids here on tumbs Fallen out of love: *insert joke about the bitterness of school* Laughed until you cried: @mrs-linny-universe remember that post with the googly eyes Found out someone was talking about you: no...? Met someone who changed you: i think everyone you meet changes you, because if you never met them then you would be a different person completely and the path of your life would have diverged (is that enough bs yes it is let’s move on) Found out who your true friends are: what does that even mean it sounds omnious Kissed someone on your Facebook list: wat. (actually, yes. i peck my friends on the cheek all the time)

GENERAL: How many Facebook friends do you know in real life: all of them. i keep getting friend requests from friends of friends in edmonton and it confuses me because do i know you? no. Do you have any pets: i had a crested gecko named charlie but he died Do you want to change your name: no? What did you do for your last birthday: i think a movie with my friends. What time did you wake up: 9:30am here, 6:30pm back home. heck yeah time zones What were you doing at midnight last night: sleeping lol i only slept 3 hours during the 20-something hour travel time.

Name something you cannot wait for: for ib to be over and for hiveswap to come out When was the last time you saw your mother: she’s beside me right now hi mom What is something you wish you could change about your life: i never really thought about it? What are you listening to right now: parents/aunt/uncle/grandparents chatting Have you ever talked to a person named tom: yeah man. every time i see him i say hi to him but he’s neurodivergent so he never really replies Something that is getting on your nerves: vpn is slow but it’s better than not talking to my friends for 2 weeks. Most visited website: email and tumblr Elementary: classified High school: classified, but it’s a private school and we have hoodies with our uniform which is pretty nice College: i’m still in high school rip Hair colour: black. i’m asian. Long or short hair: got a pixie cut a few months ago, i always grow it out really long and then chop it off again Do you have a crush on someone: i guess??? What do you like about yourself: arty art Piercings: naw son Blood type: idk but mosquitoes love me and i hate mosquitoes Nickname: we’ve already established this Relationship status: married to @seokgis, in a side relationship with @thelifeditch (jokes i’m single) Zodiac sign: we’ve already gone over this Pronouns: she/her Favourite TV show: idk i guess ml or voltron for animated and stranger things for live action? i don’t think about this much. Tattoos: underage lol Right or left hand: right

FIRST ____: Surgery: naw son Piercing: lol Best friend: first bestie i remember is this girl named sharon back when i was like 3-7 i think. Sport: mom forced me to do swimming but i really liked skating before i was too inflexible Vacation: does immigrating to canada count, bc then i think it was the time my friend dz and i went to capilano Pair of trainers: i think this means either bike trainers or what british people call runners but i still don’t get what the question is asking so sure?

RIGHT NOW ___: Eating: just ate an orange. they are my lifeblood Drinking: i literally never drink liquids it’s so bad for me (but yeah i just drank some oj and i’m laughing because i didn’t even realize) About to: sit here and waste time on tumblr, maybe do some tok, probably sleep because we’re going to leave for the airport at like 3-something-am for the chinese tropics or smth Listening to: we’ve done this let’s move on Waiting for: i live in the moment. *snickers and breaks down in laughter because the real answer is i have no idea* Want: sleep, maybe? i always want to sleep. also, like aaron, i would like a hug. Get married: like i said, i’m already married (jk i’m still in high school, but yeah i would like to get married in the future) Career: “your high school career is very important” - said no one ever (or maybe it’s everyone ever, who knows)

WHICH IS BETTER ____: Hugs or kisses: hugs Lips or eyes: eyes Shorter or taller: like think is for ppl im interested in right. taller, then. Older or younger: older would be less weird? Nice arms or nice stomach: arms? i ain’t spending time looking at ppls’ stomachs Sensitive or loud: what. Hook up or relationship: relationship Troublemaker or hesitant: lemme just ask WHAT ARE THESE QUESTIONS

HAVE YOU EVER ____: Kissed a stranger: naw song lol Drank hard liquor: what defines hard liquor, because i’ve sipped some like really high percentage alcohol but i don’t drink. Lost glasses/contact lenses: rip my contact lens just fell out of my eye once. Turned someone down: um i don’t think so? Sex on first date: SHEILD MY INNOCENT EYES YEESH I’M 16 I PREACH ABSTINENCE Broken someone’s heart: idk about broken, but maybe Had your own heart broken: nope :) Been arrested: i’m too young for this Cried when someone died: no one really close to me has died so no Fallen for a friend: haha everyone i’ve fallen for has been my friend

DO YOU BELIEVE IN ____: Yourself: yeah? Miracles: if i didn’t i would have to not believe in Jesus (awkwardly phrased but i think you get the picture) Love at first sight: if you see someone and you just “fall in love” then that puts love lightly. i think that love is something really serious and needs to be developed. Santa Claus: i’m too old for thi-- JUST HEAR THOSE SLEIGH BELLS JINGLING Kiss on the first date: depends on who Angels: yaaa. again, comes with my faith (i hate phrasing stuff like this because it makes it sound trivial but i honestly don’t know how to say it)

OTHER ____: Current best friend’s name: i have several Eye colour: brown Movie: oooooh boy. i love lotr but i’m also that one person that loves every single movie, even the ones that every say sucked. proof: i absolutely loved suicide squad. i’m also a cinematography nerd but i just fangirl over the shots and never really think about them lol

okay i tag everyone who read this to the end and the people who i mentioned earlier because i’m really lazy

#okay wow that took too long #i'm going to go do something rn idk what #everyone's asleep bc 15 hour time difference rip #i guess i'll do hw or draw or smth

3 notes · View notes

klaineccfanficlibrary · 6 years ago

Note

hi i was wondering if you had any good coffee shop aus? like either of them owns it or works at one?

Hey @evanisoverwhelmed! Ooh, I love coffee shop aus with a passion, so this is going to be a very long list. I’m also going to mention the stories where they’re both customers meeting in a coffee shop, all right? Enjoy! Hugs, Marjan

23 by felix_felicis33

Blaine doesn’t think he’ll ever fall in love, or get the chance to, but that all changes when he meets a man with blue eyes and a beautiful smile at a coffee shop. The world seems a brighter place when Kurt enters his life. The only problem is, he doesn’t belong here with Kurt. He belongs ninety-one years in the past, back in the year 1923.

50 First Dates by Aki_Aiko

Blaine Anderson meets Kurt Hummel in a little coffee shop and they immediately click. The only problem? Kurt forgets who Blaine is every single day. Based on the movie 50 First Dates.

A Great Day to Meet the Love of Your Life by @unshurtugal

AU where Kurt and Blaine didn’t meet in high school. Kurt’s first relationship was with Adam, and a few weeks after a particularly nasty break up, Kurt happens to bump into him and his new boyfriend at a coffee shop. In a moment of panic to not appear as alone as he is, Kurt kisses a stranger. His name is Blaine.

About Coffee Shops, Pick Up Lines and Two Boys by @daydreamerlily

“Kurt is really happy to have found his coffee shop. And it’s totally unrelated to the fact that the guy behind the counter looks dreamy.Ok, maybe it is related. But sue him, the guy is very good looking.”What if the guy you have been crushing on, hears you saying a stupid pick up line? And what if from there it starts a weird but super cute relationship based on those pick up lines? What if Kurt Hummel falls in love with Blaine Anderson in a way that is all theirs?

Across a Crowded Room by @lady-divine-writes

The first time Kurt sees the handsome stranger, it’s like a fairytale. Their eyes meet from across a crowded room, and Kurt falls hard. But in this fairytale, Kurt gets called away to deliver coffee and bagels to the higher ups at work, and is in danger of never seeing his prince again. And the next day, he doesn’t. But that doesn’t mean they don’t end up together in the end.

Ad Eros by @the-cimmerians

AU. Kurt grows up. Blaine does too.

After Sunset by @fablewriter

Blaine is a vampire who works in/owns an all night coffee house. He meets Kurt when Kurt comes in one night after being sexiled from the loft. Cue challenges of dating someone who can only go out at night and passes out at dawn.

(Bonus if there’s a moment where Blaine is all “wow, is that the time? I’ve had such a good time talking to you I didn’t realise how close to dawn it was and zzzzzzzzzzzzz” or something like that)

Always a Coffee Shop by CharleK

Blaine Anderson is at the prime of his swimming career. During his stint in the London Olympic games, he meets the owner of a small coffee shop called The Espresso Room. Inspired by Klaine AU Fridays.

And I Am Left To Sell by @whynobritneybrittany

Shamelessly stealing the title from a line of “It’s Time.” Based off spoilers from this article revealing what Kurt’s doing for money while stuck in Lima. Because the world needs more barista!fic.

Ashtanga Yoga Love by @hazelandglasz

*AU where kurt falls in love with the instructor from those youtube yoga vids* mercedes: i thought you planned to do yoga in the morning only?kurt: y-yEAH but blaine just put up this really important afternoon yoga session and i just have SO much to do this evening! i need to relax first that’s all!!!mercedes: http://31.media.tumblr.com/20f465ec34be41664a099fa381298913/tumblr_inline_nt37y4iCLz1qalwhh_500.gif

Bad Luck Verse by holdingdaylight

It’s just Blaine’s luck that the barista at the new coffee shop is really, really cute. It gets even better when a condom falls out of his wallet in front of him.

Barista Boy, by @purseplayer

Short funny story with an unexpected twist :-)

Best Seat in the House by @constantcompanion

Inspired by mshoneysucklepink on tumblr, who wrote: “Honestly, I would like to think that Blaine is completely oblivious to the market for that because he has a bubble butt, and that in fact the inventor saw his butt once and was inspired, and Blaine doesn’t know, but he finds out in some cute way.

Oh, wait, an AU where KURT invents the bubble butt because Blaine the barista at his favorite coffee place bends over in his job a lot…Oh God someone write the thing!”

So I wrote the thing.

Beyond Expectation by @whatstheproblembaby

klaineniffhuntbastianmalec prompted: mafia/soulmate klaine. Kurt works at the lima bean, which was just bought by the Anderson family. Kurt hates the family since they’re the local mafia. Blaine’s name is on Kurt, doesn’t matter where, and has no idea his new boss is also his soulmate.

Books, Summer, Coffee and You by just-an-artist-pl (check out the sequel too)

Blaine loves books, Blaine loves to study and he is in love with the popular Kurt Hummel for two years now. But he never talked to Kurt, never made eye contact with him and he doubts that Kurt even knows he exists. nerd!barista!Blaine and popular!Kurt

Breakfast with Snorlax by @prideofportree

Blaine is a Pokémon trainer on his way to the big city. Kurt works as a barista in said city. They meet. There is a Snorlax present.

Caffeine and Love by @thistidalwave

In between cleaning stainless steel counter tops and making cups of coffee at his job as manager of Anderson Coffee Inc. in Midtown Manhattan, Blaine dreams of breaking out of the shell he’s been trapped in all his privileged life–though of course his father would never allow him to strike off on his own. When someone sets up shop in the abandoned building next to the coffee shop, Blaine thinks nothing of it save that at least his father won’t complain about it going into disrepair anymore. That is, he thinks nothing of it until he meets Kurt Hummel. Then it basically all goes to shit.

Careful, The Beverage You Are About To Enjoy is Extremely Hot by @munchkinpandas24

“He read somewhere that it was one of Starbucks’ brilliant marketing strategies to maintain at least one completely dreamy (gorgeous, ravishing, steamy, prettiest of the pretty) guy behind the counter at any given shift. Nicely done, Starbucks. It seemed Kurt found his absolute favorite.”

Catch Me A Catch by @lilyvandersteen

Blaine is a hard-working pre-law student and part-time barista, whose brother Cooper has snagged a role in Funny Girl. Kurt is a diligent NYADA student and intern at Vogue dot com, whose roommate Rachel is the new Fanny Brice. Cooper and Rachel hit it off immediately, and then start scheming to get Kurt and Blaine together.

Chocolate Croissant by @missmichellebelle

There’s a certain employee that would entice Blaine to keep coming back even if they stopped serving his croissants entirely.

Coffee Shop Listening by @flickerthenflare

Kurt and Mercedes take an interest in the live music at a coffee shop, although Kurt is most interested in the musician.

Coffee Shop Soundtrack by CoffeeEyes (squick warning: infidelity)

AU where Kurt and Blaine never met or dated in high school. Blaine works at a coffee shop in New York and Kurt comes in one day.

Covered in Rain by oncetwiceforevr

Blaine plays guitar in a cafe, Kurt’s there one day and Blaine’s smitten. Inspired by this picture as found on Zachary Quinto’s twitter and John Mayer’s Covered in Rain. A love song to New York City.

Crema by @twobirdsonesong

Kurt’s just landed a job at Vogue as Carrie Bradshaw’s assistant. One of his tasks is to bring her coffee in the morning. Enter Blaine, the barista. This is the story of how they change each other’s lives.

Cross Your Mind by @supercess

Blaine Anderson is a normal person; working at a coffee shop and once in a while, playing for an audience at a local music bar but when he gets a chance to attend a prestigious fundraiser, he meets a certain Kurt Hummel. And now one question is on his mind: how do you make a celebrity fall in love with you?

Daily Special by @spinmybowtie

Kurt is working at a coffee shop for some extra cash, when Santana, his meddling coworker, decides to help him score a date with a cute regular.

Damaged Hearts Can Heal by @mrscriss2012

“As if in every lifetime that you and I have ever lived, we’ve chosen to come back and find each other and fall in love all over again…” Blaine and Kurt meet in a Coffee Shop.

Delicious by @hazelandglasz

barista!blaine fic in which kurt is alone on christmas eve and sitting in a cafe and blaine made him a drink and watches kurt as he licks the whipped cream off his drink and blaine never looks at the whipped cream can the same way again and then the cafe slowly empties and blaine goes over and talks kurt because he looks so lonely and all he wants to do is make this beautiful boy laugh and he does and soon enough it’s just to two of them left and kurt has a spot of whipped cream the corner of his mouth and blaine wipes it away with his fingers

Double Double by @downtowndystopia

Blaine Anderson is an international student at a Canadian university. He meets Kurt Hummel in a Tim Horton’s and the most stereotypically Canadian coffee shop au happens. (Based on an almost-true story) (no really)

Drawn Your Eye by @backupandround

A wee barista!Kurt drabble based on this post

Early by @accio-chris

“I came earlier, so I could talk to you, alone.” It was Blaine’s turn to blush.

Everything by @somethingfishyfan /morethanwords

Blaine Anderson was everything.. and Kurt Hummel was in love

‘Blaine leant forward, closer to Kurt. “I know the coffee order of all my favourite customers,” he whispered.’

Everything Has Changed by @dont-stop-believin-in-klaine /blackrose1002

Day 8 of Klaine Valentine’s Challenge 2016

Coffee shop AU :)

Excuse Me While I Fall For You by ohmyheartsbeentried

There’s a new curly-haired guy that plays guitar at the coffee shop; he’s charmed everyone with his voice and stage presence. One of their most frequent (and best dressed) customers has certainly taken a liking to him. Not that this is any of Sophie’s business. She’s just a barista.

Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop by @accio-chris

14 days, 14 songs.Two boys, one love.

***

Day 2 - Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop by Landon Pigg

Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop by @iliketowriteaboutklaine

Written for Klaine Valentines.

Prompt: Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop by Landon Pigg

Whlie visiting Lima, the Anderson-Hummels return to the Lima Bean.

Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop by ItsNotEasyBeingQueen

A few Lima Bean moments in the Klaine timeline.

Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop by @somethingfishyfan /morethanwords

‘This was so unlike me.. but my whole body ached with just how lovely he was.’

Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop by @starsandcologne

College!klaine au; The one where Kurt longs for a date with the new barista.

Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop by @warblingaway

AU Klaine. Kurt goes for coffee every Wednesday, and the one time he sees Blaine changes all future visits for him. At this coffee shop, the same song plays every Wednesday at the same time, and Kurt slowly relates to them, one lyric at a time.

Falling In Love At A Coffee Shop by @whenidance

A series of coffee shop scenes throughout Kurt & Blaine’s relationship and Kurt, Blaine, Rachel, & Mercedes’ friendship. Based on Falling In Love At A Coffee Shop by Landon Pigg (yes, that song from that commercial). Written for this prompt.

Fantasies Make for Tidy Relationships by @lady-divine-writes

Blaine has his life set up just the way he wants…well, no, not really. After a painful breakup with a manipulative, abusive boyfriend, Blaine can’t quite get back in the groove of things - anything. He spends more time teaching than following his dream of striking out and having a career in music, and as far as relationships go, no. Too messy. Too complicated. Too much of a chance of getting hurt. Even though the handsome, witty, charismatic owner of the coffee shop he goes to every morning, Kurt Hummel, really seems to have a thing for him. And Blaine can see him having a thing for Kurt, too…but no. Still too messy. Still too complicated. No matter how flirty things get between them. But Blaine needs something. All his old methods of stress relief are just that - old. So he hops online in search of something new, a toy that will take his old routine of self-pleasure from boring to soaring. And if he happens to start fantasizing about his beautiful barista, what could it hurt?

This is the story of how Blaine Anderson realizes he’s having the relationship he’s always wanted with a machine instead of with the man of his dreams.

Finally Found The Boy by @whatstheproblembaby

Based off my tags on this Tumblr post: #okay but combine all four: person a works at a coffeeshop #person b works at a flowershop #they start fake dating to cover for person a who’s lied to their parents about meeting their soulmate #but then they do whatever thing reveals soulmates while fake dating and start REAL DATING #THE END

Frayed at the Ends by sparkofinspiration

When the love of his life Kurt Hummel left him, a broken Blaine Anderson dropped out of college and moved in with his parents. At 25 he decides to move to New York City to pick up the pieces and start fresh, but a run in with Kurt stops him in his tracks.

Grande Non-Fat Mocha by JustGidget

“He loved the way the boy would smile at him. He loved the way he would giggle and brush at his bangs when Blaine would greet him with “Grande Non-Fat Mocha?” and slide the cup over to him.“

Grande Non-Fat No Whip Mocha by dontwantyourcrown

Completely unrelated to You’re The Cream In My Coffee. This is a Barista!Blaine AU. One shot only, first meetings AU where Kurt is a frequent visitor to a coffee shop and Blaine wonders why he’s so paranoid about his drink.

Half & Half by @skivvysupreme

Puppy!Blaine loves his barista job, and his coworkers and customers love him. He likes to be liked, and he loves feeling appreciated. It’s just… well, there’s only one coworker, in particular, who Blaine wants to notice him…

Happy Accidents by @lilyvandersteen

Blaine, who is going to the same coffee shop every morning, at the same time for his morning fuel, is confused. At the coffee shop, he often sees the same faces - of the other regulars. There is one particular face he looks forward to seeing, though, but Blaine is just not sure if the face belongs to one or two men (twins). Kurt has shared custody of his kid. The weeks when he is dad, he dresses one way, the other weeks he is more sharply dressed.

Happy golden days of yore by prettyskylark

Kurt passes by the coffee shop every Thursday evening. A coffee shop where a very cute pianist plays and whose smile warms Kurt’s heart even on the worst of days. So when chilly weather and bad mood make Kurt finally step in, he takes his chance and go not only for his coffee order (written for the Klaine Advent Drabble Challenge, Day 1: Artist).

Hello by @dont-stop-believin-in-klaine /blackrose1002

Day 8 of Klaine Advent Drabble Challenge

Coffee shop AU :)

Hope by @dont-stop-believin-in-klaine /blackrose1002

Day 8 of Klaine Advent Drabble Challenge

Soulmates!Klaine AU :)

Hot and Strong by @rospeaks

Blaine owns a coffee shop. Kurt is his favorite customer.

I don’t need you to fix me but I want you to help me by @prettyskylark (trigger warning: physical abuse)

Blaine is just a simple barista and Kurt has got a perfect boyfriend anyway. What if he is not so perfect after all?

I Feel Good by DreamingKate

Kurt and Blaine meet and NYADA and Blaine basically falls for him right away. He’s happier and it’s easier for him to get out of the bed in the morning because he knows he’ll see Kurt. One day, they’re out to coffee or something and Blaine sees a piano in the shop so he sings Kurt I Feel Good by AJ Holmes and basically it has a cute, sappy ending.

I Have Measured Out My Life In Coffee Spoons by @daswarschonkaputt

Based off Sara Rye’s Tumblr Klaine Young Models AU gifset.

Kurt Hummel is one of the most coveted young models, with a phenomenal following. Blaine Anderson is not far behind, even if he’s forever going to be labeled as ‘the kid from the GAP commercials’.

They’ve never worked together. Until they do.

I Wanna Hold Your Hand by @munchkinpandas24

Just a quick one-shot from a tumblr post. Basically magic happens when Blaine and Kurt hold hands and it’s adorable.

Ik was meteen ondersteboven by @forabeatofadrum/maanorchidee

“you and your friend always sit at the table and gossip in [insert language here], which happens to be a language i’m currently learning. i’ve been eavesdropping to try and improve my listening comprehension and oh my god are you actually talking about how hot i am??” and Blaine speaking Dutch, because it’s an AU I’ve never seen before.

I’ll Wake with Coffee in the Morning by kurtsolos

“What’s wrong with the Lima Bean?”

“There’s nothing wrong with the Lima Bean, it’s your motive for going in the first place,” Sam says. Tina nods.

“Yeah, it’s just… again? This is the third time this week,” Tina prompted. “Blaine, you don’t even like coffee.”

Or an AU where Blaine is always looking for opportunities to ogle the cute barista at the Lima Bean.

It all began with bets by Biscuit

AU: Kurt’s working in a coffee shop in New York as a barista. One time Blaine wanders off to the part of the Big Apple that he’s never visited before and he discovers the coffee shop. He sees Kurt, falls in love and then keeps coming back until Kurt says yes to flirting.

Jitters by whatiknew

Blaine Anderson gets up at 5am every day to serve coffee with Santana Lopez. And that is the easiest part of his day. As he starts his sophomore year at NYU, Blaine tries to navigate his inevitable conquering of Tisch while figuring out how to talk to the beautiful boy who’s started frequenting the coffee shop. There might be dragons involved.

Learning Who You Are by @whatstheproblembaby

Boy band member!Blaine/not famous!Kurt. Kurt meets a cute guy in a coffee shop, and what happens next is a little more than what he was expecting.

Life Less Ordinary by dizzy and @savvymavvy

Blaine’s life is privileged, fantastic, and entirely routine until he changes things up and tries out a new coffee shop, where one struggling NYADA student named Kurt Hummel happens to work.

Like a Handprint on My Heart by @somethingfishyfan /morethanwords

Blaine is a NYADA student finding his way in the big city. Kurt is the 'feared’ owner of Blaine’s local coffee shop. We all know they’re perfect for each other - this is their journey.

Listen by @blainesdevon /hwespn

AU where you know someone is your soulmate when they make a certain noise. It could be laugh, a sneeze, a moan, or simply them talking. Whether you decide to listen to that noise is up to you.

Blaine Anderson is a 23 year old fresh-out-of-college music teacher. Kurt Hummel is a 25 year old barista and aspiring fashion designer. They hear each other, but will they listen?

Lost and Found by holdingdaylight

Kurt is the loneliest boy in the world on Valentine’s Day, until he stumbles into a quaint little coffee shop hosting an open mic night.

Love Shack by anythingbutplatonic

Coffee shop AU.

Love Soaked Lungs by @switch842

Blaine is annoying the shit out of Santana with all the whining he’s been doing about how lonely he is and how he hasn’t gotten any in forever. Okay, maybe not that last part, but she can tell it’s been awhile. He’s awfully tense. So, Auntie Tana decides it’s time to take matters into her own hands.

Maybe the star that shined before… by @hazelandglasz

Klaine Prompt : Mistletoe

Klaine AU First meeting

More than a non-fat mocha by @onceawarblette

Summary: So I was inspired by this perfect post http://shinnysarah.tumblr.com/post/36754871502 where Santana tries to help Blaine, a barista at the Lima Bean, to get a boyfriend by writing a rather blunt message on the board outside the shop. It does bring one particular customer by though, and they want a little more than a non-fat mocha.

Mostly Roastly by @fablewriter

Anonymous said: Cooper owns a popular coffee shop in NYC, Kurt is his new barista and Cooper’s brother, badboy!Blaine, takes an immediate liking to him?

No Flirting by @klainechel

A cute lil’ barista!kurt besotted!blaine story inspired by this beautiful giftset.

Number by @dont-stop-believin-in-klaine /blackrose1002

Day 14 of Klaine Advent Drabble Challenge

Coffee shop Klaine AU :)

on my way by @fearlesslysgleefics

From the day they started crawling, Kurt and Blaine were on their way to find each other.

Right in front of you by @munchkinpandas24

Blaine is a nerdy barista by day that is in love with his favorite coffee patron Kurt Hummel, the only problem is Kurt is not reciprocating the feelings. But Kurt can’t think about anyone who isn’t this hot curly headed lead singer of his favorite band. Little does he know that the singer is the same barista that has been nervously flirting with him for weeks.

Roses in December by @ckofshadows (WIP, trigger warning: violence)

In a cozy coffee shop in a small town, a boy with beautiful blue eyes sits at the same table every day, as if he’s waiting for something, or someone. Blaine feels strangely compelled to sit down and talk with him… and discovers the unimaginable.

Santa’s Super Sleigh by @lilyvandersteen

Blaine is enchanted by the caroling elves in the mall, especially the boy elf.

Kurt keeps seeing the same cute boy in the audience when he is singing with Rachel and Santana.

Will they ever get the chance to talk?

Scenes from the Broadway Bean by @gleekto

Coffee shop AU. Kurt and Blaine. New York and a coffee shop.

Kurt is a freshman at NYADA - top of his vocal class, stage combat superstar. He’s busy becoming a star, so what if he scores a zero in coffee shop romance history? Or in romance history all together?

Blaine Anderson is a sophomore at NYADA. Song writer. Performer. Barista. Sworn off boys altogether. Though he really hopes Kurt Hummel will let him buy him a biscotti. What? White chocolate cranberry is seasonal. And delicious.

Secret Message by @whatstheproblembaby

Inspired by a picture I saw on hermioneclone’s Tumblr.

Silly Love Songs by @hkvoyage

On Valentine’s Day, Kurt goes to the Lima Bean for his usual grande nonfat mocha. He meets a gloomy teenage boy who doesn’t believe in romance…or does he? An alternative meeting set during Season 2’s ‘Silly Love Songs’.

So I Need a Favor by @klainehugs

Blaine doesn’t expect anything when he walks into his favorite coffee shop. Kurt doesn’t expect anything either, but he’s got a lunch date with Rachel and Finn soon, and he’s promised to bring a boyfriend who doesn’t exist. Neither of them expected anything at first, but then Kurt saw the good looking guy sitting by himself in the corner of the coffee shop. So, “I need a favor…”

Somebody to Love by @bazllton

Klaine Coffee shop AU in which Kurt is a barista and Blaine is a dorky customer. Basically just lots and lots of fluff.

Sometimes, I Wish To Fall by MakerOfAnarchy

In a coffee shop, on a hot, humid day, Kurt finds him. That’s how it starts, and it does not end.

Soulmate Script by @sunshineoptimismandangels

Written for a Tumblr Prompt: “I wish you would write a soulmate fic for Klaine (there are loads of those already, but I’m sure you’d give it your very own unpredictable twist).”

Blaine and Kurt are best friends, living in New York and enjoying their lives. From the outside it looks like two good friends waiting to met their soulmates in the city of their dreams. The only problem is Blaine is in love with Kurt, who could never be Blaine’s soulmate. Kurt is waiting for the the person who’s name matches the script on his skin, waiting for someone other than Blaine

Soulmates & First Dates by alexwhitney

Kurt’s a 19 year old NYADA student; Blaine is an 18 year old who works at a coffee shop. Since their 18th birthdays, they’ve had their soulmates name on their right wrists, and they’ve been searching for that person ever since.

Summertime Blues by @somethingfishyfan/ morethanwords

Another coffee shop fic. Kurt’s reluctantly working though the summer. Lucky he likes his boss!

Starbucks Lovers by whoaaitsmichele

klaine advent drabble challenge day 17: rent

barista!blaine meets kurt

Sweetest Mistake by @hazelandglasz

Anonymous asked > coffee shop au: Kurt gets his coffee everyday from the shop around the corner because he thinks the barista is cute even if he always screws up his order. Truth is, barista!Blaine is just too distracted by his stunning customer to make it properly. :D

Sweet Like Coffee by Ellienerd14

Blaine is a blushing barista with a massive crush on a frequent customer.

And then one day, blue eyes are full of tears and they finally have a much needed talk.

Take All That I Am by becausehiships (please heed the warnings!)

In a world where extreme opposites can’t help but attract, never to leave one another alone again, rock bottom is just the beginning.

For Blaine, rock bottom turns him right side up and suddenly he doesn’t feel like running anymore. He finds a beautiful, ethereal, much-older man in Kurt, the owner of the coffee shop Blaine escapes to for shelter from the constant black cloud that follows him everywhere he goes. The Lima Bean is, gratefully, within the boundaries of the allowed radius Blaine’s constricted to after stealing a thesaurus (of all things) and he falls into a routine with Kurt without effort, seamlessly inserting himself into the man’s life, forcing his way inside his heart.

The Boy from the Lima Bean by heystella

AU. There are three things he knows about Kurt. One, he’s a barista at the Lima Bean. Two, he does community theater. Three, he’s totally going to take Blaine out for a movie date this Friday. K/B.

The Coffee Artist by glee-klaine-Dalton

Kurt owns a small coffee shop in the middle of New York. He makes it his mission to cheer up other New Yorkers by putting a small sentence on their cups to brighten their day. But what happens when a cute guy comes along?

The Coffee Conundrum by @twitchysquirrel

Kurt just wants a %@! mocha. Will cute barista Blaine give him one?

A humorous and very short story that you can read on your phone while you wait in line for your own coffee.

The French Connection by @goldenraeofsun

Blaine was perfectly satisfied as a barista/college student in New York working under Santana Lopez. Well, everything was fine until he developed an almost unhealthily obsessive crush on that cute French exchange student that kept coming by during his shift.

The line between spontaneous and stupid by colferbird

Kurt is a barista. Blaine is charming. Can I make it anymore obvious?

The Medium Drip Incident by zikwon

Klaine alternative meeting. That’s it, that’s the summary.

The Most Beautiful Boy I’ll See All Day by @chatterboxrose

Kurt’s coffee machine breaks down, that’s how he ends up going to the little coffee shop Chae +, and meets the beautiful barista named Blaine. AU. I thought of this little fic because of this photo. :)

The Shadowy Corners of Me by @switch842

There’s a new barista at the coffee house on campus who has Blaine intrigued.

Through the eyes of the observer by @klemonademouth

During the day, a barista saw a lot of things- people arguing on cellphones, sappy couples, people getting their heartbroken, people getting proposed to. All stages of love, out on display for the world to see, if it so chose. Klaine. Coffeeshop fic.

Tonight & Forever by raymykeller

AU in which broken, cynical Kurt meets optimistic, romantic Blaine at a coffee shop. Can Blaine win Kurt over? Can Kurt believe in love again?

Turn Around Bright Eyes by @lilyvandersteen

This is based on the following Tumblr prompt: you work in a coffee shop and are in the middle of a hella rendition of ‘total eclipse of the heart’ and get WAY too into it, and a (really hot dammit) customer tried to get your attention by singing “turn around, bright eyes” AU

I turned it into a fluffy coffee shop Klaine romance with bonus Cooper :-)

Wander by swallowthewhale

In the early 1990s, Blaine is an aspiring musician working in a coffee shop to make ends meet. There he meets Kurt, a fashion writer whose self-confidence makes Blaine wish he were brave enough to be himself.

warm coffee (do you love me?) by beanieklaine/ princeissy

In which Sage, the barista at the Lima Bean, watches Kurt and Blaine’s relationship develop.

Waste of Time by @istytehcrawk

When Kurt’s not working at the Vogue.com offices, he’s picking up shifts at a coffee shop, where he’s not the only one with his eye on a cute customer.

What He Wanted by DreamingKate

Blaine always got what he wanted but this new guy was ignoring him. That wasn’t okay.

Will you do the fandango by @hazelandglasz

Klaine Bingo : Disney / Dreamworks

Anonymous said: we live in halls opposite each other and i keep seeing you changing through your window.

You Remind Me Of Coffee by @misspelledideas

Starring Barista!Kurt and High School Student!Blaine, and how they meet and get together. Completed one shot. Rated T for Santana and inappropriate language.

You’ll Add to the Local Color by HermioneGrangerTwin

“He’d expected Kurt to be seated with coffee in hand, so it comes as a shock to him when he comes into the coffee shop at 2:05 and Kurt is nowhere in sight.”

You’re The Cream In My Coffee by dontwantyourcrown

Here are some one-shots/drabbles of Barista!Klaine, all will probably take place in the coffee shop, but we’ll see.

#klaine #klaine fanfiction #fic finder #evanisoverwhelmed #coffee shop #barista!Kurt #barista!Blaine

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samtheflamingomain · 7 years ago

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february

28 days. There exists but a February between us finally meeting. Despite February being the shortest month, this "February" will undoubtedly feel like the longest.

It took a while for everything to feel real - both us and the trip. We've both been busting our asses saving up, but also busting our asses waiting.

Pearson Airport is barely in Toronto. There's 5 major parts of the Greater Toronto Area: Etobicoke to the west, Toronto in the centre, Scarborough to the east, and York and Markham up north. Pearson lies as far west as you can go before you're out of the GTA.

I explain this because, to me at least, when you land and come through the sliding glass doors into Terminal 1, it still won't feel like you're in Toronto. I'll get to bring you into the real Toronto. The plane only does half the work. (Well, okay, maybe 60% at most).

We'll get on the train and be downtown a half hour later. There won't be much to see on the train ride, but I'll have plenty to see right next to me. A jet-lagged sleeping beauty, if you'll excuse the lame Yuuri on Ice reference.

You'll fall asleep at the hotel and hopefully we'll go out and see the things to see in the evening. CN Tower visible everywhere, thousands of pedestrians flooding the sidewalks, the brightly lit billboards at Yonge and Dundas Square. It won't matter much where we're going.

We'll go to Church and Wellesly to hit all the gay bars, we'll walk up Yonge and see all the specialty stores, the restaurants from every corner of the planet, and about 25 McDonalds'.

I'm sure Tim Horton's won't hold so much as a birthday candle to coffee from Washington, but, as I'm sure you know, it's illegal not to try it.

Time permitting we'll take the Bloor subway all the way to Kennedy, then take the train, then a bus, then walk a half hour down the hill to the Scarborough Bluffs, arguably the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Or maybe we'll ferry to Toronto Island and hit the amusement park if it's still open. It'll be too late in the year to go canoeing, but the view still can't be beat.

We'll demand that Connor come into town so I can show you off; he'll be quiet at first but with a few hours (or two drinks) he'll be as open and witty as I am, and you'll understand why we're the closest friends you'll have ever met.

We'll sing our lungs raw at the concert and fall asleep in each others' arms before leaving, taking the 2-hour Greyhound up to Kitchener. As we pull in you'll see the Tri-Cities from one end to the other, from rural Cambridge to the downtown terminal, driving right through my old neighbourhood.

There's not a lot to see or do downtown, but Uptown, a 10 minute bus away, is where the millenials live. Unable to walk two feet without tripping over a hipster or a Korean restaurant, laughing at the sheer number of head shops and vape stores that have popped up in less than a year. And, of course, navigating the clusterfuck of construction.

We'll get on another bus that will show you the Universities, just two blocks apart from one another, making for the busiest part of town. The bright purple Laurier and the black-and-yellow UW. You’ll get to see our one-and-only 7/11 and one of our three Starbucks.

Then another short bus north and you'll see Parkdale: the two plazas and, of course, my apartment complex. We'll hold hands and jaywalk across the parking lot, up the hill and all the way back to unit 6. Hopefully the trees still have some orange and yellow leaves; or perhaps they'll be blanketed in snow. Hopefully the dumpster won’t be overloaded with shit like it usually is.

Banksy will be there to greet us at the door and demand to be pet. You'll get to see how truly tiny my place is and wonder how I crammed all the stuff into it that I did.

We'll get an all-too-short slice of domestic life: grocery shopping, a doctor's appointment, cooking in my dollhouse-sized kitchen. I can already see your face aghast at how little I have to eat and the four pizza boxes that will undoubtedly be stacked in the fridge. But I'll show you my brand new vitamins you made me buy and you'll smile.

I'll find a day where Little Caesar's is staffed with my favourite coworkers and bring you in. You'll meet the odd-but-oddly-likeable Rob, the adult-like teenagers Alycia and Lily, and hopefully not stern, resting-bitch-faced Karen.

You might see Makula as she runs out the door or stinks up the house cooking; you'll likely meet Julian and Eric, nerds of your caliber, and I'm sure you'll all gush about games I've never played and about which Magic card is best.

We'll have to spend a night at Thirsty's so you can meet Liz, Deb or Casey the bartenders and Doug, Damien, Roy, Ginger, Matt, Mary and other regulars. We'll have to get wings - Cajun - the have the best I've ever had.

But all the activities in the world won't match up to the time we spend laying next to each other not believing any of it is real and not thinking about when it will end.

Maybe we'll spend some time just watching stuff at home or playing video games, singing or drawing or painting together. I'll show you my favourite everything, the language textbooks I wrote myself, the infuriatingly disasterous amount of art supplies I have, my weird books and atlases, the only 14 photographs I own, all the books I've written in, all the journals I've accumulated, all the art I've done that no one's ever seen. Because I know you like it so much, I'll play you all the piano I can.

The last night before you go I know we'll cry until dawn. We'll get back on the bus to the terminal, onto the Greyhound, onto the train and into the Toronto airport that isn't in Toronto. We'll be in that limbo again for an hour before your flight is called and it won't feel like it was enough, and it also won't feel like it's over, not until the last moment I see you in the flesh, queuing up for security, undoubtedly in tears that never really stopped flowing.

But we won't be sad long. We both know we'll see each other again soon, but of course, the weary thought of "not soon enough" will never escape the backs of our minds.

We'll kiss one last time and then you'll be gone - but not really. You might not always be here with me, but you'll always be present with me.

See you after one more February.

Love Sam

#love letter #sam

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