#till we manifest him back
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getoswhore · 11 months ago
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stroke on my face rn
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deus-ex-mona · 4 months ago
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daily nagisa till kimikawaii gets an mv: day 1
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redeyerhaenyra · 1 year ago
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Konïg discovering his size kink
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Summary: Konïg discovers how much he likes how big he is compared to you
Warnings: Guess what! Smut. It's just smut. Size kink (duh), Doggy, Google translate German (I'm sorry 😭), Konïg being a bit of a himbo, afab reader, there is one time at the end reader is referred to as a girl in German, but honestly there's no other mention of readers gender so I hope the nonbinary pals will also be able to enjoy :D, let me know if I've missed anything
Notes: Reader is written as smaller than Konïg but he's so huge that anyone of any size can enjoy this!
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The way I'm always so ready to talk about size kink
Especially with Konïg omg!!!
6'10 giant he really is my King
Anyway
I think Konïg's size kink didn't actually manifest until you
Sure he's not blind, he knows how he towers over everyone else
But it's like, it was never a part of his sex life till he was having sex with you
Like it just never occurred to him
But then, with you, it suddenly all made sense
He had you in doggy, fucking you on his thick cock in deep, steady thrusts
In this position he'd a chance to really observe how much bigger he was than you
Normally, when you two fucked, he'd be so entranced watching your beautiful face he'd have no interest looking anywhere else
Oh but now.. now he could see
How the plush skin of you hips spilled between his big hands, how they were fully enveloped by them
How he could so easily pull you back and forth, spearing you on his cock like you were nothing more than a fleshlight
A low grunt caught in his throat, dick twitching as the realisation of oh, he liked how much bigger he was than you
He liked it very much
Konïg leaned over you, pulling you further into his lap as he squished his whole body around you
He's so all-consuming, every sense is filled with him and him alone
He moans open-mothed in your ear, and licks up your neck
"Scheiße, ich hatte nicht... nicht gemerkt, wie sehr ich deine Kleinheit mag, Schatzi. Do you like it too? Ja..ja.. das wette ich, ja.." (Fuck, I did not.. not realise, how much I liked your littleness, honey.. I bet you do..)
After you and he cum, he finally notices how hard your poor litle muschi tries to keep all his cum inside, but it just can't help to let some leak out and dribble down your thighs
Makes sure to give it a little soothing thankyou kiss
Takes a moment to tell your pussy how proud of it he is, taking such a big cock in such a little hole, such a trooper
Cuz like, I know his dick is big!!! I know it!!!!!
It's proportional, shall we say 😭 your cunny working overtime so Konïg makes sure to show his appreciation to it
"Mein Gott, ich weiß nicht wie du das machst, work so hard for me, all of your strength goes into fitting my dick inside you, ja? Ja.. because you're so little, my tiny, tiny mädchen.." (My god, I don't know how you do it)
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shibusawaz · 2 years ago
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I haven't gotten a single Shibu card in mayoi. I really wanna get a card for Shibu :_). The SSRs I got are: [Flawless] Sakunosuke Oda, [Golden Demon] Koyo Ozaki, [The Dark Age] Ango Sakaguchi, [Shady Surgeon] Ogai Mori, [Summer Festival] Dazai Osamu and Chuuya Nakahara, [Dual Pistols] Michizou Tachihara, [Unawaked Dreams] Dazai Osamu, [Swimwear] Kyoka Izumi, [Radiant Banquet] Gin and Kyusaku Yumeno, [Ocean Voyage] Kyoka Izumi, [Band] Nathaniel Hawthorne, [Rainy Season] Kenji Miyazawa, [Rashomon] Akutagawa Ryunosuke, and [Black Cat in the Rue Morage] Edgar Allan Poe. I'm just praying that the game will give me a Shibu card. He is so freaking cute in the game! (The most adorable chibi in my opinion-)
Theres a step up scout right now with Shibusawa's Incarnation of Singularity! The Dead Apple prologue event does give you a shibusawa card, but it's super tedious to go through and the card it gives you isn't too good 😭 my advice is to pray that we get a rerun of the Bundled Up scout this month, the Shibusawa card is super cute!!
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hyewka · 1 year ago
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warnings. switch!beomgyu, idol!au, brief mention of choking
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cant stop thinking about trainee!reader and idol!beomgyu, where gyu first introduces a fuck buddy relationship after sleeping with you one time, not aware that alone would be the sole reason his obsession and attachment manifests. just imagine dom gyu whos used to fucking with no strings attached due to the nature of his occupation and who thinks itll be the same with you until he feels bored enough to leave your messages on delivered. but idol!beomgyu who one day lets out his frustrations, too roughly and mean that when hes done and sees the hurt, the less than normal distance, gets some clarity to immediately melt into apologies, inspecting every inch of your body to be sure you’re okay.
beomgyu who for once, lets someone sleep in with him after sex all because of what he assumed was really bad guilty conscience. awkward as he attempts to scoot for some room, letting you cover your body under his blanket, just completely rigid as he stares at the ceiling with his hands to his sides like some soldier.
then…he does it again, he lets you sleep in, this time its because he’s tired and he can feel your exhaustion radiating off you. he’ll feel bad letting you walk all the way to your flat. but due to how frequent you get together, his arms feel more comfortable wrapping around your figure as you drift to sleep.
when he lets it happen the third time, it’s a problem.
you didn’t fuck, not even a quickie or a makeout session, just him, for whatever reason, asking you to cuddle. cuddle. “i’m stressed, with the comeback and all.” he mumbles lamely, biting down slightly on his lip, trying to convince himself as well.
“when you’re stressed… we fuck.” you say slowly, and skeptically.
just when hes about to backtrack and take it back you jump in his bed anyway, “whatever i’m not gonna refuse a good mattress.”
and then when you sleep with your face turned towards him, he feels like hes been sucked in, looking at every detail as if hes trying to have a picture in his head forever.
beomgyu who gets attached way too fast and way too quick that after the fourth time you‘ve fucked around and sees you flirting it up with soobin he absolutely loses it.
“i just got him a gift to congragulate him for landing the mc gig..why’re you acting like i murdered your entire bloodline?”
because thats what it feels like.
he inexplicably presses harder on your throat, shutting you up more by pressing his lips on yours, kissing and kissing till your lips were swollen, his brows furrowed deeply as you pathetically attempt to roll your hips into his. fucking you against the wall in a random artists’ green room, five minutes before a pre recording…hes fucking lost his mind.
god, he’s addicted.
imagine when your dynamic slowly flips, none of you are aware until you realize how often he follows you around like a puppy fan—you don’t think he was ever this clingy. beomgyu being the one who tries to meet up any chance available even paying you a visit secretly in the practice room at midnight, sneaking in snacks.
then its the sex— he’s more vocal, more sensitive when you touch him, moaning so loud you would have to clasp a hand over his mouth to muffle the sound. his eyes glaze over at times when you praise him and holy shit what the fuck was up with choi beomgyu.
the beomgyu you met that one day, fucked at a random hotel, and quite literally introduced hard kinks almost immedietely nows in front of you, crumbling down to his knees with his glossy eyes peering up at you like you were a god, begging you to use his face to get off. ruin his makeup. ruin him, please.
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reallyromealone · 9 months ago
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Title: Oh Look a mate(s)
Chapter 3
Fandom: obey me
Pairing: demon brother's x male reader
Warnings: omega verse, nsfw, male reader, gay, smut, attempted assassination, drugging, biting, torture
Notes:
🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️
It was tomorrow.
The wedding was tomorrow.
(Name) Was quiet as he waited in the altar room, candles circling the room as marble carved murals surrounded him, the ceiling glass and the moon directly above him.
He sat in silence as the moon reached its peak before shadows flooded around him, a cold smoke that strangely didn't strike him with fear but instead filled him with warmth and safety. "Good Omega" one of the voices whispered as shadowy hands grabbed at him, gently touching and smoothing over the linen nightgown he wore before a long finger sliced it down the middle "Shhh" he could hear Satan's voice whisper in his ear as the seven men materialized and kissed various parts of his now exposed flesh "beautiful..." Mammon whispered breathlessly before biting into (name) 's flesh, the others doing the same.
Each scent gland was claimed as a tattoo manifested onto their soulmate tattoos, the demons licking and kissing their soulmate marks "You're bonded to us forever... Whenever you need us, call for us..." Beelzebub said as his blackened eyes gently kissed (name) 's lips as the fire of the candles burned brighter "Alphas...." (Name) Babbled as he leaned into someone's shoulders, Levi he believed... "So beautiful..." Asmodeus whispered as his hand crept down to the other's abdomen and began whispering enchantments, hand glowing as a tattoo formed on his stomach "Your first heat will be in less than 24 hours, this will help keep it from hurting so badly"
Never would he be denied a heat again.
The men scented and kissed (name), they could smell the slick flowing from him but knew better and to wait, wait till it was time.
When morning came, (name) was kept from his alphas all morning as he was polished to perfection, traditional white robes and gold accessories set aside as they painted swirls on his body, apparently matching the marks that would be on his alphas.
He looked at himself in the mirror, the makeup, the paint, and the clothes... He hardly recognized himself.
But it was him.
All him.
Lucifer made sure the guards were on high alert as he and his brothers got dressed, in their traditional robes that were the color of their omegas eyes, as is tradition in the kingdom, they already had two people sneak in after all.
"Your Majesty?" A meek voice spoke out as the demon turned to see an Omega maid look nervous, his eyes sharp and calculating "What is it?" He said simply and the maid straightened her back a bit before speaking once more "His Highness... He's extremely stressed and I thought it would be best if one of his--" Lucifer was already darting out of the room for his mate, he didn't care if he wasn't supposed to see him till the wedding.
His mate needed him.
(Name) Was freaking out as his omega decided Kw was an excellent time to freak out over the lack of alphas.
To be fair he got scented every morning but today, was a very high-stress day.
"My, aren't you beautiful" (name) snapped his head up as the maids left the room with haste and (name) whined and ran towards him, shoving his face into the alpha's chest and whining "My, can't go a day without your alphas?" He teased and lifted (name) 's face to look at it "None of that, you will ruin your pretty makeup" he was only soft for his omega, gentle kisses "We have a wedding, right? We will dance and party and then when the moon is high we will take you back here" he promised and kissed (name), scenting him lovingly.
"Now be good for alpha" he commanded, a slight alpha tone that they found calms (name). He liked not being in control all the time, instinctually.
"Ok alpha" he whispered hazily as the maids came back in and Lucifer left to finish getting ready, confident that he calmed his mate.
(Name) Looked nervous as he was ushered into a beautiful fabric and mahogany palanquin, the finest silks used for it "To walk you to the temple, your Highness" a soldier said calmly and (name) nodded as the soldiers in celebratory costume lifted it and (name) tried not to yelp.
He walked through the city, a grand parade to show the people the next queen, and (name) shyly waved at them as the people cheered in joy and some looked in envy at him. He could hear screaming in the distance, too focused on the slight shake with each step the guards took and the loud sounds around him to figure out what direction it came from exactly but the bullet that flew past his nose as a man was pinned down by guards have his answer, the omegas palanquin lowering as the guards checked on him "oh thank goodness... Are you alright your Highness?" The general that was a bit ahead rushed to check on him and (name) though stunned and Shellshocked, nodded slowly the Alpha nodded with a sigh of relief "We will get there soon your Highness"
The parade continued and (name) tried to regulate his breathing as he lifted his sleeves and took in the smell of Lucifer that clung to him, too close to his heat to be able to properly handle this.
God, he was so tired...
"We're here your Highness" Had that much time passed?
(Name) Was helped out by his maids, dressed in floral traditional outfits, darker colors as to highlight (name) 's snow white robes that dragged behind him, gold accents matching his accessories "You got this, your Highness" (name) 's closest maid, the one in charge of his maids smiled and (name) nodded before walking up the steps of the temple as people cheered.
Traditional fan dancers danced in front of him, a beautiful display as the guests of the wedding sat and watched in awe as (name) locked eyes with his alphas and had to suppress a chirp. The dancers moved their fans away to make an entrance for (name) to walk closer to them, Asmodeus taking his hands and kissing them gently as the others looked fond at the sight of their beloved, even Belphegor awake and focused on (name).
(Name) Looked at the guests, from countless kingdoms the Royals down to the mayors from cities including the village he was from, and looked in awe at the realization of how large this temple was, it seemed so small in the darkness.
(Name) Barely focused on the priestess as he looked at his mates, shadowy magic binding them together as (name) agreed to the contract of marriage "bound by the fates and the demon king himself, his Highness (name) Morningstar is granted a gift from his majesty of immortality, may his heart beat so long as his alphas" the demon king sat in the distance, watching his younger sons fondly, leaving hell to witness such an event as a red-haired demon stood beside him while staring intently.
(Name) Felt warm as he was brought close by his alphas and danced with them, a grand party that was sure to go on for the next week as guests watched and the city partied and after brought around to be introduced to guests "This is our elder brother, the next king" Lucifer introduced the Omega to his elder brother, next king of hell and intimidating to say the least but the large grin that broke out on his face said otherwise "my, a pleasure to meet you! My apologies that it took me so long to be able to meet you! Let me know if they act up all right. It will be nice to not have a little brother that will get on my nerves!" He teased as he hugged (name) and seemed so warm and understanding to him.
"My mate couldn't make it sadly, they're too far along to make the trip but hopefully after you two can meet!" Lucifer felt warm that his elder brother and a mate got along so well as the other brothers were dragged to talk to guests and eventually Lucifer and (name) went to speak to others, the Omega passed from alpha to alpha to not hog.
"An hour and you don't greet your parents?" (Name) Froze under Asmodeus' gentle hold as he turned to see the mayor of his village and his parents... And sister.
How did they get here?
"Not even an invite, thankfully our dear mayor invited us as his plus ones as his wife and sons couldn't make it," she said casually as his sister altered between glaring at him and swooning over Asmodeus, the beta looking flirty and showing her bust at him but the demon didn't even acknowledge her as he tilted his head at his mate's parents with a cold smile (name) didn't recognize but the gentle thumb rubbing his hip told him he was safe "my~ isn't this a surprise, (name) darling... Why don't you go make sure Beelzie doesn't eat everything, yes?" He urged his hesitant Omega who looked so precious and watched him walk away.
"E-excuse me!" The dad tried barking out and Asmodeus smiled coldly, a beta demanding not just an alpha but a supernatural alpha. Laughable really "I will allow you to continue to enjoy this celebration but if I hear even a whisper of my mate's name from any of your lips that isn't shining adoration I will remind you of your place," Asmodeus said barely above a whisper as he towered over the stumpy beta and his family, he read the letter.
All seven brothers read the letter.
And despite not being wrath, Asmodeus was the most upset.
No flirting, no banter.
Just a thinly veiled threat.
"Now you best behave"
You would think this Would deter (sister), make her behave... But no no.
She was hell-bent on having them.
Breaking this farce is a marriage.
It was expensive getting rut enhancer drugs but it was worth it in her eyes she looked around and saw that (name) was moved to Belphegor who sat in a corner quietly and (name) said worthless words to him and saw that Beelzebub was enjoying his food.
Perfect.
The drug was a fine powder, easy to mask on the powdered cream puffs that the demon was gorging on, slipping past when he went for some ribs and sprinkling on.
She just had to be available when the drugs kicked in.
It was not too long before the demon returned his attention to the cream puffs... But other people took them as well.
Like servants bringing them to their kings.
Oh well, she thought as she focused on Beelzebub and deemed everyone else as a stepping stone to her happiness.
Beelzebub froze after ten minutes, eyes dilating as he stood and looked around "Are you alright?" She tried to seduce the Alpha, pressing against him but like her brother, she didn't quite understand how mating worked and believed he would go to the first willing hole.
But in reality, he sought out (name) who was talking to Diavolos butler, the two fondly chatting about something or another.
"Move," he said coldly as he locked onto (name) marched to him, and lifted him, the other brothers looked concerned as Diavolo decided to start a ring dance and nodded at Lucifer, they all seemed to understand what was happening. (Name) Was confused as he was held close by his alpha who left the temple gardens and spread his wings before taking off, (name) shoving his face in Beelzebub's neck and that's when he smelt the rut. He couldn't help but whine, he was trying so hard not to go into heat but fuck...
He closed his eyes and felt himself sink further, sounds distorting and he felt his clothes removed carefully as voices spoke around him "he will be upset if we ruin this" Asmodeus...? Or is that Satan? "Alpha?" He slurred as the alphas kissed his flesh, cold to the touch and he felt something hard press against his back before he was pushed into his back, he couldn't even formulate a feeling of shame or worry as Belphegor traced the body paint that was on (name)s flesh "pretty..." The sleep demon murmured as he touched the womb tattoo a wave of pleasure washed through (name) and a low moan broke through him "Any pain he feels will feel like absolute pleasure... We may be dealing with a very horny Omega" Asmodeus teased, they didn't have an incantation to make him feel no pain during heat or pregnancy so it was the best option.
Especially because he kept moaning and crying, without it he would be writhing in pain.
"Why don't you spread your legs for us? Hmm? Show us how an Omega presents?" Lucifer spoke low and deep to the Omega who spread his legs on the bed and yelped when Beelzebub shoved his face between his legs and gave a long lick, pushing his legs over his shoulders as half his body was pulled nearly off the bed, Beelzebub on his knees before the bed. "O-oh! Alpha!" He cried out as Beelzebub ate his ass, licking around the rim before pushing in ever so slightly as the smell of slick was heavy in the room "wanna make alpha feel good? Why don't you show Levi here how much you want his cock?" Asmodeus took the initiative with getting (name) to pleasure them as they pleasured him, the Omega opening his mouth so prettily as the shy alpha fed him his cock, (name) licking the underside as he sucked. "H-how did he get so good?!" Levi gasped as he felt (name) hollow his cheeks with a vice force "I have been teaching him how to be a good little cock whore~" Asmodeus teased as Belphegor sucked on one of (name)s nipples as Asmodeus and Lucifer got hand jobs, the two assisting (name) a bit as his body shook.
Satan kissed his navel before moving to the omegas cock and sucking on it, the pre-cum leaking like crazy as (name) struggled to comprehend all the pleasure he felt, hips being held down as Beelzebub inserted a finger, curving it upwards against his prostate as he ate his ass like a final meal and added another finger "you're gonna be-- fuck! Taking a lot tonight baby ~" Asmodeus stammered as Levi came down (name)s throat, the Omega choking slightly but managing "fuck..? Shit.." Levi was already babbling as (name) 's body shook and a climax rolled through, Satan drinking it all "You want more?" Lucifer asked the Omega who whined "Nest!" Beelzebub wasting no time, feral and horny As the other alphas slowly went into a rut from being around a heat-stricken Omega, their demon forms were on full display. (Name) Was settled into his nest as they let Beelzebub enter first his large and heavy cock pressing against (name)s ass as (name) made out with Lucifer, pretty little sounds as Beelzebub pushed in slowly.
Each inch made for louder and prettier sounds from (name) as his body glistened with sweat, another climax rolling through him as Beelzebub was halfway through bottoming out before his hips snapped forward and his pelvic bone was pressed against (name)s ass cheeks "oh! Big...!" He cried out and pushed against him as Belphegor went behind him and held him up, kissing his neck as the others watched hungrily.
Beelzebub wasted no time pistoning his hips as (name) clawed at his skin, body shaking and writhing in pleasure as he poured slick "puppy up!" He cried out as he begged to be bread, owned and full... Belphegor moved around to Sroke (name)s cock and kiss his neck before biting into its neck watching (name) unfold as Beelzebub rolled his hips at the tightness and his grip so tight it was going to leave dark bruises on his hips come morning.
"Please please! Pup!" (Name) Begged for cum, pulling Beelzebub for a kiss and tasting his slick as the alpha's hips slammed one last time and cum poured into him, hot and sticky.
Beelzebub felt some sanity return to him as he looked at a fucked out (name) who couldn't even form words but babbled nonsense as Belphegor kissed him and coddled him "Let's get water and food into him then the next round starts" Lucifer instructed as they already prepared the necessary things that morning, food tested by the demons along with the water before feeding it to (name).
(Name) May have immortality but they still didn't want anything to happen to him.
Though poison pains right now would probably give him six earth-shattering orgasms.
No! No! Bad!
They washed the sweat and paint off his body as (name) recovered slightly but soon grew whiny as he was placed on top of Asmodeus, cock pushing in with ease and crying as Asmodeus gave harsh and slow thrusts.
"Come now, you got more to take ~"
Mammon was furious, absolutely livid as he slammed his fist against the assassin's skull, not wanting this vermin alive as his mate struggled with his heat and six cocks currently "You are taking my precious time with my mate, who the fuck sent you?" He was bordering feral as the assassin finally gave in "The sister! She wanted him dead!"
Oh?
Interesting.
Mammon left swiftly, telling the guards to find her, she couldn't have gotten far after all.
For now, the greedy demon needed to sink his cock into (name)s cute little ass.
And maybe bite it.
Bite it.
When he walked into the heated room, already nude he was met with (name) being railed by Asmodeus and Satan, cocks moving in his hole at vigorous paces as (name) sucked Lucifer's cock like he would die "(name), look whose here" Lucifer pulled him off his cock to look at mammon and the whine and moan that left his lips as he cried for the silver-haired demon, hands reaching for him, and who was mammon to deny something like this?
Mammon shoved his tongue in (name) 's mouth and relished as the Omega tugged at his hair "Wanna make me feel good?" He didn't even have to show his erect cock as (name) moved and took it in his mouth, mammon sighing at the tightness of his throat "he's a natural" Satan slapped (name)s ass as he pounded as Asmodeus sucked on his chest, the omegas hands going back to work as everyone slowly found a spot for them, the Omega cumming again in the process.
(Name) Was unconscious with Belphegor, needing a heavy rest before the next wave and thoroughly fucked out, the other alphas getting their turns after as Mammon reported findings and what the assassin admitted "She most definitely drugged Bee, our ruts not till winter" Asmodeus said thoughtfully, he should have just let Satan do what he originally wanted to do but that was (name)s choice, not theirs.
But now it was treason that they were talking about.
An attempted assassination against (name).
You see when Diavolo was the next king of hell, they were given rule of the overworld and essentially made (name) queen as they were to be overworld kings come coronation granted by their eldest brother.
And after this, (name) would be carrying their heir.
God, they were half erect at the thought of (name) pregnant.
"I have a manhunt for them, a bounty will be put up as well"
For now, they would care for (name).
When (name) woke, he couldn't feel his legs and his head felt foggy as he was placed into a warm bath "Good morning, lamb" Satan caressed his cheek "Alpha?" He said weakly, voice hoarse from their activities as Mammon gently massaged oils into him, the alphas already washing the cum and sweat off him "Hello pretty baby~ you took us so well, we are so proud of you" (name) chirped at the praise as he received loving kisses "after this was gonna feed you" Lucifer promised and (name) felt a slight sense of clarity "cuddle? Before heat comes back?" He asked as the others smiled, unable to resist the request.
(Name) Was naked and dried off as he cuddled the others who doted on him "You did so well, absolutely beautiful my love" Asmodeus cooed, and (name) let him kiss and love him "My garden?" He asked softly, why that was his worry beyond anyone but Lucifer eased his worries with the promise of the gardeners taking care of it.
For now, he was to relax.
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s3thwrit3sstuff · 8 months ago
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you know what's delicious? yn who started wearing flavored lip balm/lip tint because of suguru — so that every time suguru ate a curse, he could just easily pull the man into a kiss to get rid of the disgusting taste suguru hates so much ((bonus points if yn also pops in a candy/sweet/chocolate in his mouth before feeding it to suguru through a kiss — anything to help suguru forget the taste of curses)) yeah... just... suguruyn for the win man 😋🫶
((even more bonus points when satoru finds out later and he gets all jelly because 1. he doesn't know the lip balm/lip tint can come with a flavor so he felt blindsided and of course, he humphs and puffs because of it and 2. he wanted a chocolatey sweetness kissies too!!!! and of course lastly, 3. he felt left out because he never knows that suguruyn always makes out every single time suguru ate a curse so he's all pouty about it — ask him to join in next time!!!))
❝ He's just like candy, he's so sweet ❞
polycule (Satoru x r! x Suguru)) | alternate universes (Suguru is not a cult-reader), fluff, NSFW | vers. bottom. reader (AMAB) | NOT PROOFREAD | wc: 3.6k
warnings: foodplay, threesomes, pouty satoru & smug suguru, semi-public sex, d/s dynamics
masterlist; part 1; part 2; part 3; alternate ending; playlist; au's and what if's
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author's note: in this au, they slayed the links that made me lose my mind (thank you @xuxitheii for making me squeal and kick my feet): geto suguru : gojo satoru : gojo satoru being a big baby
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Curses. Ugly as sin and tastes just as foul. Suguru remembers the first time he discovered he could devour them; how awful it felt as it went down his throat, bulging out and staying there — blocking his airway as he struggled to find it in himself to swallow.
The way his teeth ached. His throat convulsed and his instincts forced it back up but his fingers blocked it from doing so. It warbled in the back of his mouth, begging to be let out and 7-year-old Suguru just knew he couldn’t bear for it to disturb him again. He couldn’t handle it speaking nonsensically into his ear, slinking under his bed or even staring right at him as it grinned so wide Suguru swore he could see his reflection in its yellow, wicked-sharp, teeth.
The pills his parents (his poor, non-sorcerer, parents) had given him to help with his “hallucinations” made him feel as though a thick fog was obscuring his brain. His thoughts faded and his movement groggy, his emotions caged while his body still felt the anxious tremors that ran through him when he saw them.
The curses made him feel like he was constantly in a deep pit of despair. Everything wrong in the world, the depravity and impulses of humanity that manifested into these grotesque creatures in the palm of his hands made his nose sting, till this day, as an 18-year-old; it made his eyes well with tears.
Suguru can't describe it in a way people could understand. But if asked, he’d used the viscera of a vomit rag being forced down your throat.
But the strong protect the weak. While your lips protect them from his ire. This one goes down with a loud gulp, his fingers blocking his lips as he tosses his head back. The worst is almost over, the aftertaste will linger but not for long. Because then, he feels your weight on his chest and Suguru is pliant as you gently pry his fingers away.
“You did a good job, baby.” Suguru flutters his eyes open and he can’t help the way his lips twitch eagerly. Your lips are glossier than usual, he can smell the cherry flavour on them. His hands wrap themselves around your waist. It’s a firm grip.
Mine, he says without speaking, mine — all mine.
He pulls and a huff of air escapes you in a series of chuckles. “I know we haven’t been out in a while, but did you miss me that much, Su-Su?” Suguru frowns at your jest. It’s rare for him to pout. That role is often delegated to your boyfriend, Satoru. So this must truly upset him.
Because, yes, he did.
You’d been called overseas to complete a mission. It was the norm for sorcerers considering the population of sorcerers in Japan; outsourcing they called it. Your curse technique was needed for this mission and truly, it didn’t take long but Suguru had done solo missions and he missed you.
Three solo missions. Three disgusting, dog-shit, vomit-stained rags, down his throat. Three days without you by his side.
He hated it.
“Don’t ask a silly question like that ever again,” he mumbles. Silly. The way he scolds you always makes you smile. Never crass or rude — his voice reminds you of the symphony of leaves singing with the wind as they danced and speckled light onto the forest floors and cool water bubbling over rocks.
“Why? Why can’t I ask silly questions?” You tease, placing your elbows on his shoulder and hanging your hands behind him. Purposefully lax despite the coquettish smile on your face.
“You already know the answer.” He speaks with such sincerity. Every word is heavy with nothing but candour and adoration. It makes your eyes soften and Suguru squeezes you closer.
“I do?” He nods at your words, the tip of his nose brushing over yours and his tan skin so flushed on the apples of his cheeks.
“Kiss me like you miss me, baby.”
Suguru’s lips land on yours like a feather. Supple as always he begins it with a long-lasting peck. Pouty lip against pouty lip. His hands climb up your back and he presses between your shoulder blades to somehow hold you closer; his jaw opens and yours does the same. There it is — that heaven that’s your mouth. Suguru groans and you feel his tongue sneaking in, devouring you like a starved man.
The cherry flavour on your lips, the sweetness of the candy you let melt on your tongue, the way your fingers grip his hair, the way he can feel your breath on his cheek as you try to breathe. He wishes that the two of you never needed air. Suguru wants nothing more than to kiss you forever and ever and ever —
“Hey!”
You part with a gasp, cheeks warm and lips almost bruised as the line of spit between the two of you breaks. At the mouth of the alleyway was your boyfriend; Gojo Satoru.
His arms are crossed and he taps his foot in a cartoonish fashion. Despite that, both of you know that the frown on his face is very much real. “What gives? I exorcised the other curses and I came back to the two of you making out. So unfair!”
Suguru parts with a sigh, rolling his eyes to the side and pouting his lips to the side as he muttered about Satoru having FOMO. It makes you giggle and he smiles when you lean forward to place your face right under his jaw.
“S’toru, you’re being a baby. Suguru did a lot of work and I was just thanking him.” Satoru unfolds his arms and flaps them around in protest.
“I did work too!”
And it has begun — Satoru’s famous little tantrums. Oh, he could go for a full hour if he was really worked up but there is a saving grace in him having them. He closes his eyes when he’s yappering. Suguru is listening to his huffy boyfriend but then you kiss his chin and he tilts his face down to look at you.
“Hm?” your teeth brush over his lower lips, then plant firmly on his. “Baby?” he smiles in the lip-locking and you whine about it because his lips should not stretch into that handsome smile, they should be pursed outward and part to let you in.
He tastes chocolate on your tongue. The creaminess of the chocolate makes him groan along with the citrusy notes. That combined with the fruitiness of the cherry tint on your lips makes the taste of the curses he’d ingested (exorcised) all but disappear. Your hands climb to the lobe of his ears and his breath hitches when your fingers trail the curve of it, he protests a bit as you undo his bun; then you whisper his name and Suguru tightens his grip on your waist.
“Hey!”
Satoru is whining again but this time he’s closer. Close enough for Suguru to grab a fistful of Satoru’s white button-up and pull him in. As his face turns you giggle, wiping away some smeared gloss as you watch Satoru turn red from Suguru’s heated kiss.
Satoru groans with his eyebrows twitching. Listless in his attempt to remain angry at Suguru. He pounds his fist against Suguru’s shoulder and attempts to crane his neck away. When he turns, he gasps as you steal his breath.
Satoru’s graceful legs tumble over themselves as his boyfriends press him to the rough wall of the alleyway. There’s a constant hum of an A/C machine and the noises from the pipes keep the intimate noises between the three of you contained. Suguru’s blunt nails drag onto the faded plastered-on advertisements — yours grip onto the bars of the window that had been covered up by old newspapers.
Satoru’s grip onto the front of both of your shirts. His glasses go askew as he struggles to keep up with his boyfriends. Suguru misses Satoru so much. He’d been away too, the Higher Ups sending him overseas at the same time as you and Shoko had to deal with a depressed Suguru for those 3 days.
“Mah, Satoru,” you drag your lips to Satoru’s sensitive neck. His hands don’t seem to know what to do with themselves. It grips and pushes and stutters. “I always give Suguru special kisses after a job well done, you’ve just always been too busy to notice.”
“S’not fair,” Satoru retorts with no real venom in his words. “I deserve special kisses too, don’t I?” Suguru chuckles, forcing Satoru to look his way and shut him up. Satoru glares over the rim of his crooked glasses as Suguru’s thumb presses down on his canines.
“What a jealous brat.”
“Can’t even handle a little teasing.”
Satoru would heavily disagree with that. A little teasing? You called being pushed to a wall, groped, kissed, and bitten by your handsome and powerful boyfriends a little teasing?
Satoru was a sign of change, his birth instantly tipped the scales of the sorcerer world, but he was still human!
Suguru grins that irritatingly pleased grin when Satoru’s protests die out thanks to your hands slipping down his pants. “Oh shit,” he hisses. His speech is odd with Suguru’s thumb in his mouth, casually inspecting it. But you laugh anyway.
“You know, since he has been away too, maybe he does deserve a bit of sugar from you, (Y/N).” You glance at Suguru, your cock chubbing up in your pants as he pointedly motions his gaze to the ground. You kneel in front of Satoru and drool slips down his chin as his pupils chase after you. Suguru chuckles, wiping it away and wiping it off on Satoru’s shirt — to which he hears no complaint. Suguru stands behind you, bending at his waist to peer down. It’s unfair how pretty he is from any angle. The Gods took their time making him. Of that, you are certain.
“Ready, sweetheart?” you nod, opening your saccharine-sweet mouth; Suguru pats your cheek as praise and undoes Satoru’s pants for you. His cock springs out, nearly bumping into your nose as it strains and twitches in the open air. When Suguru holds it, Satoru grunts and raises his hips. Fucking into his fist like a dog in heat. Suguru regards this with a shake of his head and guides Satoru to your mouth. You form a fist around your thumb, looking up at Satoru through your lashes as you wrap your lips around him.
Suguru straightens his composure. He takes in the sight.
Satoru and you know better than to be handsy. The pale-haired man grabs onto the bars of the window behind him, breathing through his nose as the toe of his shoes dig into the floors. You slip your eyelids close and languish in the taste of Satoru’s cock — breathing through your nose as well as you bob your head.
Fuck, Suguru missed this. He really did. He could get off on this alone. Just watched as both of you enjoyed the other. His darling boyfriends, who so obediently listen to his whims even if he didn’t say it out loud.
Who could ask for more?
Suguru strokes over your eyebrow and barely stifles a laugh when you tilt your head so Satoru’s tip pokes your cheeks.
“Good boy. My sweet boy.”
His voice alone makes you want to give in to whatever it is he asks of you — it’s insane how much power and sway he has. Your charming Suguru.
Satoru moans, swiftly reaching out and gripping onto the collar of Suguru’s top. They kiss. Fighting for dominance because Satoru needs to be pushed into submission. He relishes being put in his place — smacked around a little.
You could pinpoint this kink originating from his frivolous childhood and naturally talented self needing some sort of edge to sink down into a more fuzzy headspace.
Or perhaps Satoru was just a brat and he trusted his lovers enough to relinquish that control. Both theories worked.
Suguru grunts as Satoru tugs at his hair, the pleasant tinge of pain making his dick strain against his loose pants. You spot it from the corner of your eyes, an obscene slurping sound coming from you as you attempt to not make this blowjob too messy. An impossible task, really. But a worthy effort.
“Your lips taste like cherry, why?” Satoru’s question catches Suguru off-guard. He expected Satoru’s usual quips and huffiness. He indulges.
“(Y/N) wore cherry-flavoured lipgloss.”
The proof is in the coloured streaks on his dick. You feel it twitch on your tongue and pull away, your hot breath on his cockhead making precum leak out of his blushing tip. You rest it on your velvet tongue, unabashedly pouting to kiss the tip and then taking him inside again. Those slightly shimmery streaks made Satoru grit his teeth.
“I didn’t know those came in flavours,” Satoru moans. “How come you don’t wear that for me too?”
“Because it’s for me, you little shithead,” Suguru growls lowly. Their foreheads touch as he tightens his grip on Satoru’s neck, the pressure making Satoru’s eyelids flutter for a second. “It’s my prize for exorcising curses.”
“You jealous?” you wonder out loud. The answer was clear but there was a rush to make Satoru admit it.
“Yes, I am!” He curses for a moment as you descend further down to lick at his balls, looking up at him still as if this conversation was taking place over a dinner table and not in an alleyway with society just a few meters away. As if his dick wasn't on your face while you feel his balls tightening up on your tongue.
Seriously, if somebody peered down long enough they would most definitely catch sight of the three of you here.
“I just – just...fuck, I missed the two of you too. It’s completely unfair you’ve been keeping this from me too! I’ll never forgive you.”
Suguru grabs the back of your neck and pulls you backward. His large hands effectively push your head down further and further until your nose is at the neat patch of pubic hair Satoru has. You relax your throat and jaw, eyes watering while you brace your hands on Satoru’s thighs.
“So why didn’t you just tell us that, darling?" Suguru purrs. "Instead, you chose to be a brat and stomp around. You’re better than that, Satoru. Aren’t you? Hm?”
You gag but Suguru holds you in place. His hand barely has any real strength behind it. If you jerked backward, he would not hold you in place. No, no. Suguru’s power comes from the lack of strength he needs to exhibit. His dominance is in the ease Suguru commands it.
"Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. You needed him inside of you.
“Screw you, Suguru,” Satoru chokes out.
He pulls you off. You cough, spit staining your chin as you smile loosely at them. Suguru then pulls you onto your feet, pushes you to the wall, and undoes your pants. You bite down on your lower lip, staring at Satoru as you brace your hands onto the wall just next to him. Satoru watches on, trying to keep himself strong by pretending he isn’t affected by the sight before him.
Suguru gathers spit in his mouth but pauses as he feels the candy wrapper in your pockets. The chocolate brand makes his brows raise. It’s expensive. No doubt Satoru’s influence had rubbed off on you. Only one company in the world made this chocolate, its pink colour is a dead giveaway. No wonder your cherry-flavoured gloss tasted so strong, it was complimented nicely by the leftover taste of this ruby chocolate.
He lets your pants pool around your ankles while he takes a bite. It wasn’t disgustingly soft, but your body heat made it melt quickly on his tongue. He spreads your ass apart and spits a thick glob of his spit and pink chocolate. The sensation sends shivers up your back and you arch your back further, unsure about the new sensation.
“Suguru, that was expensive — ngh!”
Your eyes widen as he presses his cock inside. You were thankful for your morning romp with them. It loosened you up enough that Suguru’s impatience didn’t cause pain and only mild discomfort — he reaches forward to jerk your cock off to ebb it away and you moan out his name.
“Shh, shh, not so loud. We’re still outside, baby.”
Satoru groans, reaching to toss his glasses away as he turns his back to the entrance and gives you his full attention. He’s craving touch. To taste or to mark you up. To do anything, really. He is goddamn hypnotized by the way Suguru’s dick thrusts in and out of you. Suguru gives you a good fucking for too short of a time — pounding into you like a jackhammer and making you nearly bite your tongue off in an attempt to keep quiet before he pulls out.
Your knees buckle, thighs twitching as you try to keep yourself upright. Satoru’s knees thud onto the floor and he greedily laps at Suguru’s cock, moaning at the creamy taste. The same flavour leaks out of you while you catch your breath. The mouth of the alleyway is quiet but there are still the faint noises of the city just there. A few big strides away. But there. It excites you. You imagine it’s exciting your equally perverted boyfriends too.
"Satoru," Suguru groans at the sight of him. You peel yourself from the wall. Shoulders thudding onto the hard surface while your pants drop to your ankles. Shakily, you use your feet to push it all the way off, eyes trained on Satoru savouring the flavour of Suguru and the ruby chocolate. He pulls away with a breathy 'pwah!' and strokes Suguru's creamy dick.
You're tempted to join Satoru. Just sharing Suguru's cock, kissing Satoru with his cockhead between your lips. Fuck, just the thought has your dick slapping lightly against your navel. Suguru plants a hand near your head, turning his head to kiss you while the other is tugging on the roots of Satoru's head. a
"Both of my boys are being so obedient," he says after a deliciously deep groan of Satoru's name. "We missed you," you reply in a whiny whisper.
"Missed you so much, S'guru..."
Satoru moans, pulling away as he catches his breath and shares a heated gaze.
"Fuck, I missed you so badly. Missed this dick too," Satoru turns to your crotch and kisses the underside of your dick. It makes your breath hitch, hips jerking forward. The wetness of your precum smears on Satoru's cheek a bit but he doesn't even mind. Nor does he seem to notice.
"These cocks are the only ones that make me this hungry."
Suguru glances at the alleyway. You're not loud enough to draw attention. Still, better safe than sorry.
"Emerge from the darkness, blacker than darkness. Purify that which is impure." You throw your head back to laugh. A veil was meant to conceal, protect those outside of it, and maintain secrecy. To use it so improperly.
The three of you were truly perverted.
"What's got you all giggly?" Suguru speaks against your lips. Tilting your chin upwards then squeezing the sides of your neck just to relish in the way you bare your neck to him.
"You used a veil," Satoru speaks for you. He raises, ignoring Suguru's pointed glance in favour of unbuttoning your shirt and kissing down your chest. His lips are sticky, smears of pink tainting you but you find it hard to care. "He's laughing because he thinks we're perverts."
"What are you? A mind reader now, Satoru?" You huff.
"I might as well be, huh?" Satoru smirks. He's so handsome that it makes your chest hurt sometimes. You're against the wall, exits blocked by Suguru and Satoru and you wouldn't have it any other way. "You know, I missed you too. It's been weeks — "
"Three days," Suguru and you corrected.
"Weeks. And this morning wasn't enough. We did such a good job, those wrinkle bags can't complain if we just so happened to work overtime, right?"
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Ijichi can't stop his cheek from heating up. It's painfully, painfully, obvious why the three of you took your time for this mission. He had waited in the car for the first hour, then occupied himself with some coffee at a nearby cafe but by the third hour, Ijichi almost called Principal Yaga.
Three Special Grade Sorcerers took that long to exorcise an abandoned building. Surely, something must have happened!
Yet, seeing you sleeping on Suguru's lap with your legs across Satoru's lap confirms the real reason why it took the three of you that long.
Satoru has a weighted eye mask, head tossed back as he recuperates. This gives Ijichi a clear sight of his marked-up neck. Your shirt is wrinkled, hitched up from the bend of your waist, and giving him the whispers of handmarks. Suguru met his gaze from the rearview and Ijichi whispered out an apology.
"No, please. We're sorry for keeping you waiting." Suguru is brushing your bangs back, gently wiping down some residual stickiness on your cheeks with wet wipes (that Ijichi had made a point to stock up on in the car after earlier missions involving you three).
"No, I understand," he says with a shaky voice. Sighing a little he laughed awkwardly from the driver's seat.
"You must've been missing them a lot for those three days they've been gone, Mr Geto."
Suguru's expression softens, leaning one shoulder down when Satoru leans to place his head on his shoulders.
"It's hard not to. I love them."
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ultravioletrayz · 3 months ago
Note
Hello! So this is my idea and this is going to be angsty as hell *coughs* sorry-
Anyways, I was thinking of an idea where female spider person s/o almost failed the mission and Miguel, being the harsh jackass as he always was -_- was scolding her to death till he said something very hurtful to s/o.
She was really hurt by his words as she painfully accepted it and walked out of the office then she headed back home with her gizmo, till three weeks have passed and she wasn't really active at all. Her friends like Gwen, Jess and Peter tried to contact her but she wasn't answering it.
Miguel and her friends decided to check up on her and visit her world, till they found her badly and bloody injured like so many wounds on face and her arm was gone from having a fight with Lizard and she won. They sent her back to their infirmary while she was unconscious and doctors tried their best to stop the bleeding.
Miguel was too guilty of what he had done and started to apologize to her
this is so sad but I love it so much. this is gonna be a continuation of your idea, where Miguel and reader are in the infirmary.
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Pairing: miguel o'hara x f!spiderperson!reader
Warnings: 18+, ANGST, lots of guilt from miguel, mild blood warning, sad medical stuff, mild hurt no comfort
Summary: miguel spends weeks drowning in the guilt of almost getting you killed
A/N: I actually suck at writing angst 🫡
Word Count: 1.5K (unedited)
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Miguel stands in the infirmary, the sterile scent of antiseptic filling the air, mingling with the sharp tang of adrenaline still coursing through his veins. The fluorescent lights cast a harsh glow over the room, highlighting the stark contrast between the pristine white walls and the chaos of the medical team working frantically to stabilise you.
Their movements are precise and hurried, a blur of scrubs and instruments, each step a dance of desperation. Bandages wrap around your wounds, but the sight of your blood staining the sheets sends a wave of nausea crashing over him, the crimson liquid a stark reminder of his failure. He should have been there. He should have prevented this.
Three weeks. Three weeks of silence, of guilt festering in his chest like an open wound, a wound that refuses to heal. He had pushed you away, scolded you harshly after that mission, the words spilling from his mouth like poison, each syllable a dagger to his own heart.
“You’re not good enough,” he had said, the coldness of his voice cutting deeper than any physical injury. The moment the words left his lips, he had seen the hurt flash in your eyes—a fleeting glimpse of the pain he had inflicted, a pain that now echoes through his soul. But it wasn’t until now, seeing you broken and battered, that he truly understood the weight of his words, the gravity of his mistake.
As the doctors work diligently, Miguel paces the small room, his mind a whirlwind of regret and anger— anger at himself, anger at the situation, anger at the villain that had done this to you. He clenches his fists, the sharp edges of his claws digging into his palms, drawing blood, a physical manifestation of his inner turmoil. He wishes he could turn back time, and erase the moment he let his frustration overpower his concern, but time is a cruel mistress, and she offers no reprieve.
A doctor approaches him, her expression serious, her eyes weary from the battle they’ve all been fighting. “We’re doing everything we can, but she’s lost a lot of blood. It’s critical that she stabilises soon.”
Miguel nods, his throat tight as he swallows down the rising panic, the fear clawing at his insides. He steps closer to you, his heart aching at the sight of your unconscious form, your skin pale against the stark white sheets. He reaches out, brushing a stray hair away from your face, his fingers trembling slightly as he does so, the touch almost reverent.
“I'm sorry. I’m so sorry, mi alma,” he whispers, the words barely escaping his lips, a mere shadow of the apology he knows he owes you, an apology that feels woefully inadequate in the face of your suffering.
He remembers the moments you shared, the laughter that filled the spaces between missions, the way your eyes sparkled when you spoke about your dreams. He had been so focused on being the perfect leader, on maintaining control, that he had forgotten to be the partner you needed, the partner you deserved.
As time drags on, the hum of machines and the hurried footsteps of the staff create a haunting rhythm in the background, a symphony of desperation that echoes through the room. Miguel’s mind drifts back to the last time he saw you— your expression, a mix of hurt and resignation, as you walked out of his office. He should have run after you, should have told you how much you meant to him, but he had let his pride and anger cloud his judgement, and now he is left to bear the weight of that decision.
Hours pass, the sun sinking lower in the sky, casting shadows across the room, shadows that seem to mirror the darkness in his heart. Miguel remains by your side, his presence a silent vow to protect you from now on. He watches the rise and fall of your chest, counting each breath as if it were a lifeline, a fragile thread connecting him to the hope that you would awaken. The rhythmic beeping of the machines becomes his new heartbeat, each sound a reminder of your fight, your strength— even in this vulnerable state. The fluorescent lights flicker slightly, casting an ethereal glow over the scene, and Miguel leans forward, his heart heavy with unspoken words.
“You know, I’ve never been good at this,” he admits, his voice barely above a whisper, trembling with the weight of his emotions. “Apologising, I mean. But I need you to know that I’m sorry for what I said. I was an idiot. I let my anger get the best of me, and I hurt you.”
He pauses, searching for the right words, knowing that nothing could truly convey the remorse he feels. “You’re so much stronger than I gave you credit for. I should have believed in you. I should have been there for you.”
As he speaks, tears prick at the corners of his eyes, a rawness in his throat that threatens to choke him. The memories flood back— your laughter ringing through the air like music, the way you had seamlessly moved alongside him in battle, your unwavering determination that had always inspired him.
He watches your face intently, searching for any sign of consciousness, any flicker of the spark that makes you who you are. The machines beep softly, a steady reminder of your fight, yet with each passing moment, the silence stretches, thick and suffocating, wrapping around him like a shroud.
“I miss you,” he admits, his voice thick with emotion.
“I miss your laughter, your determination. I need you to come back to me.” The words spill out like a prayer, a desperate plea to the universe for your recovery, for a second chance to make things right.
Minutes turn into hours as he remains by your side, the weight of his guilt pressing heavily on his shoulders. He closes his eyes, allowing the memories to wash over him— the way you had smiled when you swung through the city, the way your spirit had illuminated even the darkest of days. Each recollection is a bittersweet ache in his chest, a reminder of what he stands to lose if you don’t wake up.
“Miguel,” a voice breaks through the silence, and he jolts upright, his heart racing as he leans closer. You’re stirring, your eyelids fluttering as you fight against the haze of unconsciousness, and hope surges through him like wildfire.
“I’m here. I’m right here,” he reassures you, his voice breaking with emotion, clinging to the moment like a lifeline.
You blink slowly, confusion clouding your gaze, a mixture of fear and pain etched across your features.
“What happened?” you croak, your voice weak, each word a laborious effort.
“Lizard… you fought him. You were incredible,” he replies, his heart swelling with pride even amidst the worry that tightens his chest. “But you got hurt. You’ve been unconscious for a while.”
You wince, a flicker of pain crossing your face as the memories come rushing back. “I… I remember fighting. I thought I could handle it.”
Miguel’s heart clenches at your words, a deep-seated fear gnawing at him. “You can handle anything, but you shouldn’t have to do it alone. I should have been there. I didn’t believe in you when I should have.” The admission hangs heavy in the air, a confession of his deepest regret.
Tears well in your eyes as you search his face, the vulnerability in your gaze cutting through the tension in the room like a knife. “You said… you said I wasn’t good enough.”
The words hang between you like a dark cloud, and Miguel’s heart sinks, the reality of his past mistakes crashing down on him.
“I was wrong,” he says, his voice thick with emotion, trembling under the weight of his remorse. “I was scared, and I took it out on you. You deserve so much more than what I gave you. I’m so sorry.”
You swallow hard, the tears spilling down your cheeks, each drop a testament to the pain he had caused. “It hurt, Miguel. It really hurt.”
“I know,” he replies, his voice breaking, the anguish in his heart surfacing like a tidal wave.
“And I’ll spend the rest of my life making it up to you if you let me. Just please… don’t shut me out again. I can’t lose you.” The desperation in his voice hangs in the air, a silent promise that he is willing to fight for you, for your love, for a chance to rebuild what had been shattered.
The two of you share a moment of silence, the weight of the past lingering in that small infirmary room, amidst the beeping machines and the antiseptic smell. Miguel realises that he is ready to do whatever it takes to prove that he can be the partner you need, the partner who believes in you wholeheartedly.
But as you drift back into a fragile sleep, Miguel sits by your side, his heart empty at your lack of reciprocation, the void of uncertainty swallowing him whole. He knows he’s lost you now, and it’s all his fault. The guilt festers, a relentless ache that refuses to fade, and he vows silently that he will not rest until you are back in his arms, where you belong.
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i think it's problematic that i would've forgiven him in a heart beat lmao
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meetletsinmontauk · 23 hours ago
Text
stop waiting- L.H
There's not a synopsis, I'm sorry
Disclaimer: nsfw, contains smut!!
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It had been 3 months since Lee Heeseung’s world turned upside down. 3 months since he switched from a homemade man to a big party animal. 3 months since his girlfriend, Karina, left. 4 years of relationship, for nothing. 4 years of promises and plans simply went down the sink. 4 years for at the end be cheated on with that Sim Jake guy. But Heeseung didn’t need her anymore, he had his soju, his hennessy and his weed. They would never leave him. That’s why every Friday night till Monday morning, he had his ass stuck in a party, surrounded by strangers, numb of feelings. 
Numb of feelings, that was the best part, he couldn’t feel anything among the strangers, |among the drinking, the loud music, among the dancing, the sweat bodies, among the sex, and the different beds he had been on. 3 months of living completely alienated from reality. It was the price he decided to pay in order to not feel the pain, to try, somehow, fill the void Karina left on him.
He was at one of those parties, smoking some weed on someone's couch, next to his best friends Jay, Sunghoon and Ni-ki. He didn’t talk or hung out with them too much when he was in a relationship. But now, he was free and he had no one to tell him what to do or not. Even though his focus wasn’t on his friends, it was on a girl across the room. She was wearing a mini skirt and stiletto heels and she was an old acquaintance, they studied at the same high school, they had art classes together, and he simply hated that girl. 
He hated her because she was perfect. She was beautiful, talented, kind, funny and intelligent, and, of course, he had fallen in love with her back then, when he was still a loser. During that time, they became closer very quickly, and he did everything for her. Everything to see her smiling. But she kept him in the friendzone, because she was banging with his old brother, Lee Taemin, who simply dumped her 2 months later, after he lost interest.
 It was 4 years ago. It was the last time she talked to him, and because of that, even being perfect she was also an asshole.
He kept staring at her, wondering how were the odds they would be at the same party, in the same night? He dragged his joint again, trying to relax and praying she would go away soon. He probably wasn’t good in that manifestation thing cause out of the blue, she started to scan the room, till her gaze crossed with his. “Fuck”, he cursed under his breath. And, worse, she started to walk toward his group. “For fuck’s sake…”, he cursed again, then tilted on the couch, trying to convince himself that her presence wasn’t making him uncomfortable. Maybe it was because he hadn't seen her in 4 years, but she looked even more beautiful, the most radiant and sexy version of her, which made him hate her even more. “Damn”, he thought when she stopped in front of the couch he and his friends were sitting on. 
“Hello, guys!”, she greeted, smiling, “Hey!”, drunk Sunghoon, sober Jay and stoned Ni-ki greeted her. But not Heeseung. She lifted an eyebrow and turned specifically to him “Hi, Heeeung”. He lifted his gaze, dragged his joint and exhaled slowly, everyone was looking at him, apparently he had no choice but to answer “‘Sup?” “Are you good?” “Do I look good to you?”. She stared at him, he looked good, but she wasn’t going to tell him that. “It’s been a while…”, she continued. Heeseung chuckled, “You think so?” “Why does he keep making rhetorical questions?”, she thought. “Can we… hum… can we talk? In private” “Now you wanna talk?” “Well, yes, it’s important” “You can speak. My bros and I, we’ve got no secrets” “I know we haven't spoken in a while…” “A while?!”, she ignored the 1000th interruption and continued,  “...but, hum, could you tell your brother to stop trying to get in contact with me, please?” “Are you talking about Taemin?”, she nodded. Hee laughed, “You gotta be fucking kidding me! You come here, after 4 years, to ask me a favor!? Involving my hyung!?”, he paused to chuckle, “Do you think I am some sort of idiot?”. 
She was embarrassed, the way he was stating she did sound like a selfish bitch “No… I just didn’t know who else to occur” “Well, if you want Taemin hyung to stay away from you, you go and tell him yourself”, she held back the tears, she didn’t remember Heeseung being so rude. Probably because he wasn't, but now he hated all women, he despised them. 
“Heeseung, please, I wouldn’t ask you if I didn’t need your help” “I’m not your fucking bitchboy anymore” “But…” “If you’re done already, the door it's that way” he pointed to the door of the living room. “If you aren’t done yet, go anyway”. She opened her mouth to say another thing but she gave up, it didn’t seem he was going to bend.
 “Sorry for bothering you. Bye, guys” “Bye!”, the other 3 said, while the 4 of them watched her go. Jay poked Heeseung’s arm to scold his friend, “Bro, you didn’t have to be rude with her” “What?! Are you defending her?!” “Bro, I’m just saying you could have helped her, you know your brother is an asshole!” “She’s not my problem, Jay. She picked Taemin back then, now she deals with him” “Yeah, but can you stop acting like a resentful child just for a second and…”, Heeseung put his hand on his ears and shouted, “Ah!”, Jay shutted his mouth and tapped his ears “You’re giving me a headache, Jongseong!” “What a hypocrite”, he thought before standing up. “Where are you going?”, Sunghoon asked “Bathroom” “Good! Bring me some more of this drink, yeah?” “Don’t you think you’ve drank too much already?” “Sorry, mom”, Jay rolled his eyes, “Will be back soon”.
When Jay stepped out of the bathroom the first thing he saw was her talking to her friend Minji. She had red eyes and was clearly nervous. He probably shouldn’t cause of his loyalty to Heeseung, but he couldn’t help himself, he had to do something to help. So he approached them, “Excuse me, girls…”, they turned to him “Hi, Jay”, she sniffed. Jay and her were friends in high school, they were lab partners, but he ended up being under Heeseung’s guard after they stopped talking. “I’m so sorry about Hee, he has been angry at everything lately” “It’s ok, I shouldn’t have talked to him, I know Karina doesn't like it, but he was truly my last option” “You…” “She’s telling the truth. She already tried everything, but Lee Taemin keeps creating fake accounts on instagram just to try talking with her”, Minji completed “I’m sure he does, but… you said Karina doesn’t like it when you talk to Heeseung?” “Yeah, that’s why I distanced from him” “You’re kidding, right?”. She crossed her arms and lifted an eyebrow, “No, Jay, I’m not” “Heeseung thinks you did that because of his brother” “Why would I? Heeseung was one of my best friends back then” “Fuck!”, Jay put his hand on his forehead, “Heeseung is so stupid!” “Why?” “Karina told him you asked her to tell Heeseung that if one Lee sucks, then 2 Lees probably sucked the double and you would rather lose your vision than to see any of them in front of you again” “What?!”, she and Minji said in unison “I never said that. Karina hated me since the first time we met” “Its true”, Minji commented.  “Oh my God, I have to tell Heeseung about that”, Jay turned to leave, but she didn’t let him. “Jay, wait…”, she held his arm, he looked down at her hand “What?” “Don’t do it. I don’t want to ruin their relationship. Hee’s happy with her and I want him to be happy. Even with a nasty bitch like her” “Lucky for you, they are not together anymore”, her lips parted. “W-what? Is that for real?”, he nodded “What happened?” “She cheated” “With who?!”, Minji asked “Minji!”, she scolded her friend “How’s he dealing with that?” “Terribly. He’s angry at everyone and everything. He goes out every weekend, he leaves on Friday night, and shows up on Tuesday morning. And he’s drinking and smoking a lot” “Damn”, she muttered “I really thought it was weird to find him here tonight” “Yeah… Anyway I’ll try to convince him to talk to his brother” “Ok. Thank you, Jay, it really means a lot to me”, he smiled “It’s nothing. Bye, girls”, he said before winking at them and leaving.
When he joined his friends on the couch again, Heeseung wasn’t there anymore. Sunghoon was laying down, with his mouth open, REM sleeping while Ni-ki tied the korean man’s shoe’s laces in a way that Hoon would fall when he stood up. “Where is Heeseung?” “What?” “Heeseung. Where’s he?” “I have no fucking idea, bro” “Damn, Ni-ki! Is the weed destroying your neurons?” “Bro, I am not understanding anything you are saying today” “Fuck…”, Jay muttered, before leaving to try to find Heeseung. He asked at least 30 wrong people before finding the right one “Jungwoon! “Hey, Jay” “Have you seen Heeseung?” “I don’t even see him at home, man”, they were roommates, “Fuck…” “I think I saw him in the kitchen with a girl, then they disappeared”, Jay groaned. 
He knew it meant he wasn't going to hear from Heeseung till Tuesday “Ok, Woon. Thanks bro”, he poked the younger’s chest and left, Sunghoon and Ni-ki would need his help to reach home and trying to find Heeseung was pointless.
A week later:
Jay was at the apartment they shared with Sunghoon and Niki. The 3 of them were having a gaming night, they even invited Jungwoon and Heeseung, but none of them heard from Heeseung since last Saturday. According to Jungwoon, he didn’t spend much time at their place as well. “He went home on Monday, I guess. Then he went to work, I didn’t hear from him for 2 days, and yesterday he showed up, said he had an off day and stayed in his room all day. I went to work this morning and when I came home in the afternoon he was already not there”, Jungwoon told them, sitting on their carpet while eating popcorn.
“Are guys worried about him or is it just me?”, Sunghoon asked “Yeah!”, the rest of them answered in unison. “Yes, man. But I have a plan” “What’s it?” “Do you guys remember that girl from his art class? The one he was best friends with?”, the other 3 nodded, “You don’t even attend the same high school as us Jungwoon!”, Sunghoon pointed out, “I want to be included. Now go on, Jay” “So, I talked to her at the party we went to last weekend, and it turns out Karina lied to Heeseung all that time” “What happened?”, Niki asked, “She never said those things to his ex. Apparently Karina just didn’t like their friendship and she cut contact to avoid ruining it” “Karina didn’t like any of his friendships”, Jungwoon added “That bitch”, Sunghoon rolled his eyes, disgusted. “You have to tell him that”, Ni-ki said “Yeah, but who said I can talk to him?”, at that moment Jay’s phone buzzed:
Lee Heeseung shared his live location with you
“Oh my God, guys. It's him!”, felt like he guessed he was the subject of their conversation. “What does it say?”, Woon asked “He just sent me his location”:
Park Jongseong: ‘Need me to pick you up, bro?’
Lee Heeseung: ‘Nah, come over. Bring the guys with you’
Park Jongseong: ‘Which guys?’
Lee Heeseung: ‘Anyone you want. Just come, it's boring without you to parent me’
“He wants us to come to a club in Hongdae”, they protested, nobody is in the mood for it. “I go, you guys can stay” “No! It’s game night! It’s not gaming night without you, Jay”, Sunghoon cried, “But I have to talk to him” “Do you think it will really help him to know the truth?” “I think so, at least a little” “So you should go” “Yeah…”
Park Jongseong: ‘Omw. Will be there in 20’
28 minutes later, Jay found himself in a club, trying to avoid being pushed and humped by the people on the dancefloor. He tried to text and call Heeseung one thousand times but he wasn’t successful. It took him more than 10 minutes to find the motherfucker among a smoke of weed and 2 girls on his lap, one in which leg.  “Jongseong! Finally, man!”, Heeseung shouted so Jay could hear him over the loud music. “Same, bro! Same!”, Jay already had lost his patience, he didn’t know if it was because of the ocean of sweat and drunk people he had to face to find Heeseung or the whole past 3 months. “What’s wrong, man!? You seem stressed!” “I’m stressed!” “Why, bro!?” “I have to tell you something and you went missing the whole damn week! Where have you been, man!?” “Here and there! What do you want to tell me!?” “I'd rather do this somewhere where I don't have to shout in order for you to hear me!” “Chill out, man! At least tell me what this is about!” “Karina!”. Heeseung furrowed and his jaw tightened up, “I don’t want to know!” “Yes, you do!” “No,  I don’t! She’s past!”, Jay pressed his temple, he was already done with that son of of a bitch, ““Can you stop being a fucking brat for at least 10 minutes and listen to me?!”, Jay said with his jaw and fist clenched. “Ok, ok! Chill, bro!”. 
After Hee convinced the girls to leave his lap, he walked with Jay for the parking lot. He sat on the hood of his friend’s car and lit up another joint. He offered to Jay, but he declined “So, what’s about Karina?” “She is a freaking liar” “I know. That’s why we are not together anymore” “That’s why you’ve lost your best friend too” “What are you talking about?” “Remember when Karina said she asked her to…”, Heeseung cutted Jay, he didn’t want to remember those words. “Yeah, yeah, go on” “Apparently Karina made everything up” “How do you know?” “She said she never asked Karina anything. She also told me Karina didn’t like when you guys were friends. So she stopped talking to you cause she didnt want to ruin your relationship”. Heeseung scratched his chin, trying to find a way to attack her, "How do you know she isn’t lying too?” “You know what happened to all your friendships when you were dating her”, Jay was right, Karina didn't like any of his friends, boy or girl, she wanted him all for herself. 
He dragged again, trying to process everything Jay said, “So… it wasn’t because of Taemin?” “No! She was your best friend, man, she wouldn’t have done it to you”. Heeseung placed his hands behind his head, everything Jay said made sense, all he wanted to do was scream. “Fuck!”, he screamed repeatedly. He jumped from the hood of Jay’s car and started to walk around “Can’t fucking believe on this!” “I couldn’t either” “Damn! All of those years for nothing”, he stopped walking in a sudden, as he remembered something really important. “And she reached out for my help, bro. And I acted like an asshole!” “Yeah, but you can fix that” “How?” “Talk to your brother” “Yeah, man I thought about that”, Jay rolled his eyes, Heeseung’s sarcasm didn’t affect him anymore. The older man threw the joint on the ground and stumbled on it with his shoe. “Can you help me? I think he’s here”, “Yeah, su…”, Jay’s phone interrupted him. 
He got surprised when he checked on it, and saw her name on the screen “Hold on, it’s her”, he picked up “Hello?” “Jay? Please, help…”, he heard a sound of crashing, as her phone had been thrown on the floor “Hello? Are you still there?” “Who said you could do that shit, huh?”, he heard a masculine voice approaching her phone along footsteps “It was a mistake, nobody needs help. Bye’’, Jay’s face turned into white, as he saw a corpse. “Jay! What happened?” ”Taemin, I think he’s with her” “Fuck!”, he cursed “Stop cursing and let’s find them. I heard an echo, I think they’re in the bathroom” “Let’s go!”.
“Who’s that Jay, hum? Is he your new boyfriend?” “What if he is? It’s none of your business, your creep!” “Nah, nah, nah, baby girl. Don’t speak like that to me, cause I already made you happy” “It wasn’t happiness! You used me for your own pleasure when I was hopelessly in love with you!”, Taemin chuckled, and touched her chin. “Well, I guess I did. But…”, he approached her lips “I’m truly “ “Bullshit”, she spitted on his face “Ugh! That’s disgusting!”, he dried his face “Where are your manners?” “Who are you to talk about manners?! You were just rubbing your boner on my groin without my consent!” “It’s so cute when you pretend you weren’t enjoying it” “I wasn’t!” “Sure”, he caged her in between his arms, and dipped down to kiss her, but she didn’t kiss him back, of course. He pressed his erection in between her legs, holding her forearms against the wall when she tried to fight back.
That's when Jay and Heeseung came into the bathroom. Heeseung’s blood started to boil when he saw his hyung forcing her to kiss him “Lee Taemin!”, he shouted. His brother stopped kissing her and turned around “Heeseung?!” “Take your hands off her!” “Right now!”, Jay completed “Yeah, right now!”. Taemin laughed, “Or what?”, Heeseung approached him “Or I will tell dad you have been selling drugs to teenagers, he will love it” “Are you really using the ‘I’ll tell dad’ card?” “You bet I am”, the oldest man looked at her, then to his young brother “Fuck it! This bitch isn't worth it”, he took his hand out of her “If she isn't worth you can leave her alone, right?” “Whatever, man”, he slammed the door when he left the bathroom. 
At that moment, she slid her body down the wall, buried her face in her knees and started to cry. Heeseung looked at her, then to Jay, he didn’t know what to do. “Do something”, Jay mouthed “Me!?” “Yes, go!” “No! You go!”, Jay didn’t even bother answering, he just turned around and left the bathroom. Hee rolled his eyes, then squatted in front of  her and tapped her head, softly, “Hey… are you ok?”, she lifted her head and looked at him, she looked scared “Did he hurt you?” “N-no, he just forced me to kiss him and pressed his hard dick on his groin” “Fucking disgusting”, he muttered. “I was so scared he would do something more”, Hee stretched his hand and caressed her hair “It’s ok, he is not here anymore and he will not bother you again”, she leaned forward and hugged him “Thank you, Hee”, he nodded, without hugging her back. Then, he took her arms off him and stood up, “Well, I think I’m going to take some air, wanna join me?” “Ok”, he helped her stand up and took her to the parking lot.
After Heeseung called Jay and told him everything was ok and he could go back to his gaming night, they sat on the hood of her car. Heeseung got a beer on their way out of the club and she was laying down, stargazing. “Jay…”, she looked at him, “...he said you and Karina broke up”, he nodded, drinking more of his beer “He said to me you stopped talking to me because of her” “It’s true” “I thought you were an asshole for all those years. That you didn’t care about me or our friendship…”, he paused “...it was just made up”, he drank more. She sat up, “Hee, I always cared about you and our friendship, I’m sorry that I just walked away instead of talking to you, I just wanted to see you happy” “I’m sorry for not trying to understand you too, I just believed in her blindly” “It’s ok”. 
They remained silent for a few moments before he finally said something. “I missed you” “I missed you too, Hee” “I like your tattoo”, he pointed to her left thigh. She had a beautiful and majestic dragon who went from her low belly to her leg “Do you?” “Yeah. It comes to the hip?” “To the low belly” “Wow! Sick’ “Thank you! I drew it by myself” “Really?!”, she nodded “I remember when we were in high school you were very good at art class” “Yes, I miss that time” “I don’t “Really?” “Yeah. That time was hell” “Why?” “I suffered every time I was around you” “I don’t understand…” “I had a massive crush on you and you just wanted to know about my brother” “You had a crush on me!?” “Yeah” “Well, I had a crush on you too!” “What?!” “But you were always flirting with Karina, so I thought you wanted her, not me. So when Taemin started to flirt with me, I just… got hooked on him” “She was the one who flirted with me!” “But you let her” “Damn, can’t believe it. Fucking unbelievable!”, there it goes, he was losing his temper again. 
He jumped off the car’s hood and started to scream with her, “Do you have any idea of how happy we could be right now?!” “Hee…” “I’m ruined because of her! Ruined! And you!? You were almost raped in that bathroom! Fuck!”, he kicked the front tire of her Jeep. She jumped off the hood too, “Why are you so mad about it?! You were the one who got into a toxic relationship! The one who lost yourself in that damn relationship!” “Why didn’t you tell me you like me?! Why?!” “Why didn’t you tell me you liked me?!”, he didn’t say anything, she was right, it was as much his fault as hers. But she was pissed with his behavior since the last party, “I know why, cause you’re a coward!” “Shut up..”, he muttered, “You’re a fucking pussy! Your fucking loser!” “I told you to shut up!”, he screamed at her. She stepped forward, till her nose was inches from his nose “Or what? Fucking assho…”, but he didn’t let her finish, he took her lips on hers, discharging all the represed anger, all the feeling of inferiority he felt over the past years. It all turned into a ferrous, aggressive kiss. 
She felt his salty tears on her lips, maybe she had crossed the line, so she pulled away from him to apologize “I’m sorry, Hee. I didn’t mean to, I was angry and…” “Shut up” “But…” “Did you enjoy the kiss?” “Well, I didn’t have much time to savour it but…” “Can you just fucking answer me?” “Yes… I think so” “Good”, Heeseung pulled her waist to another kiss, this time he leaned her against the hood of the car, in which she laid down, melting to the kiss, enjoying all the magical tricks Heeseung was doing with his blessed tongue. She never thought he could make her feel this way. She put her fingers on his hair and pulled it, searching for some relief. He moaned into her mouth, running a hand up her thigh, pulling her dress up with it, stopping on her belly button line. He looked down to appreciate the tattoo “You’re a terrific artist” “Thanks”, he took another look at it, then rubbed her hip bone, she thrusted it up as a reflex, he smirked “I can’t fuck you in public, babygirl” “I have a car, you know?” “I am waiting for your invitation”, she smirked, then reached for her purse and car keys. She stood up, then unlocked the car and opened the backseat door “Come in”, he did, she followed, slamming the door behind her.
Heeseung threw his belongings on the seat next to him “Come here”, he tapped his lap, she took her heels off and obeyed him. He grabbed her hips and pulled it down against his boner, wanting her to feel how much a simple kiss just made him crazy. She moaned with the stimulation, “Damn, you’re already so hard”, she muttered “It hurts”, he faked a pout “Won’t you help me?”, she smirked before moving her hand to his belt, unbuckling it. Heeseung watched her open his zipper and pull his boxers just enough for freeing his hard member, she gulped when she saw it, he was bigger than she thought. He squeezed her hips lightly, “Are you ok?” “Yes, I… I’m just thinking about how sore I’m going to be tomorrow”, he smirked “You know what a man likes to hear”, she took her lips to his neck, sucking it with the goal of leaving a mark on the sensitive skin. Heeseung threw his head back, and rolled his eyes, trying to suppress the groan stuck in his throat, his cock pressed against her belly was aching, he needed some damn relief. She finally pulled away from his neck to see her masterpiece “You are going to wake up with a bruise on your neck just for you to know” “You’re a fucking temptation”, he muttered, “What are you going to do about it?”, he didn’t botter in answer, he just ran his hand down her dress and pulled her laced pantie to the side. He looked her in the eyes the whole time he got into her, her facial expressions trying to hold a moan back was priceless, when his head collided with her cervix he started to move her hips, and neither of them could keep silent anymore, soon the moans started to stood out the sound of skin colliding. The windows of the cars started to fog but it wasn't important, Hee looked at her, who had her lips nailed in her bottom lip as she moved her hips by herself, “You’re taking me so well”, he commented in between his cutted breath, “Are you calling me a whore?” “I don’t mind if you are a whore, as long as you are my whore from now on”, she changed the angle of her hips, founding  a sensitive spot, unable to speak more than just a muttered “Yes”, she whined, “Fuck, I’m cummming very very soon”  “Good girl”, he held her hips again helping her to hit the edge, and when she did, he bucked his hips up to reach his own orgasm. After he unloaded inside of her, he pulled her body against his chest and muttered against her hair, “You are mine now”
2 months later:
Dragons. All Heeseung could think about was dragons. Because the thing he saw the most over the past 2 months was a dragon. Her tattoo dragon. Sex was good and she treated him like her boyfriend. Safer than fuck random girls he found in parties. It didn't mean he gave up on his shallow life. He still went to parties, he still avoided his feelings and had no intention in turning what they had into something serious. Even so, during the past 2 months he got a lot better, he wasn’t angry anymore, he still went to parties, but just Friday and Saturday nights, he went home after the parties ended, he started to help Jungwoon taking care of their place, he participated of the gaming nights, he took her out to places where there was not alcohol, he didn’t even got late for work anymore. Heeseung’s friends loved her, they knew he was feeling better because of her presence and her cares, “I feel like the void inside of me is finally filled again”, he confessed to Jay once “Don’t you think this is a problem?” “Why would  it be?” “If she’s gone you will feel empty again” “She’s not leaving, bro” “How are you so sure?” “I just am” “If you say so”. But one day, everything was about to change, he just didn’t know yet. 
Heeseung had a day off work and he decided he wanted to spend it with her. He texted her a casual:
‘I need you. Come over’
And half an hour later she was there, naked on his bed, doing what they did the most. They usually had very funny and nonsense talks after sex but that time she chose a topic Heeseung didn’t like at all, “Don’t you think…”, she said while tracing lines into his chest, where she was laying on,  “What?” “...shouldn’t we like…” “Just say it, you can say anything to me” “...shouldn’t we be dating?” “Oh! Why do you think like that?” “Cause we’ve been doing this for almost 3 months already, and we kinda act like a couple but we're not a couple officially” “Why do you think we act like a couple?” “Because we do” “But… give me an example” “We go out on dates, we have sex, I know your friends and family and you know mine… Do you need a few more?”, she was right, he was getting trapped, “I don’t know, I ended a 4 year relationship 6 months ago” “Do you still love her?” “No, I don’t” “Do you love me?”, he lifted his head from the pillow “Do you love me?”, she lifted from his chest “Well, yes” “What?!”, he sat up too “Why?!” “What do you mean with why, bro? Do I need a reason to love you?” “Well, I don’t know how you can love me”, he stood from the bed, panicking, “Well, I see now”, she stood up too and started to wear her clothes, “Hold on, you don’t have to leave. We can just pretend we didn’t have this conversation, and you didn’t say you love me. There’s no need to feel embarrassed” “No. I am not embarrassed and I don’t want to pretend I didn’t say I love you. I’m not ashamed of my feelings” “Fine! Just… don’t go” “Look, Heeseung, we probably shouldn’t see each other anymore” “What?! Why?!” “You clearly need to love yourself right now and I am not wasting my time with someone who is not even aware of that”, she passed through him and grabbed her purse, “C’mon!” “Bye, Hee, figure that mess out”, then she walked out the door. Heeseung sat on his bed, still naked, feeling the hole in his chest getting voided again.
…..
2 weeks later, Heeseung felt like hitting the rock bottom. He was at a party again, leaning on the wall, holding a red cup with some shit cheap whiskey in it. His eyes burned two people across the room: Ni-ki and her.
He actually missed her and watching her getting all flirty with one of his best friends didn’t make things any easier. Ni-ki didn’t have much fault, she was the one who started a conversation and she was the one who kept touching his arm and chest whenever he said something funny, which was very often. But Ni-ki was equally blamed cause he bent to her charm, he probably was high from some herb he smoked. They were getting closer and closer, Heeseung could picture them leaning for a kiss anytime soon and for that, Jay could see smoke coming out from his ears. “What the hell are you doing, man?”, he asked, “Wondering which part of his face Ni-ki would like to be punched’ “Bro, no! You can’t do it!” “But I guess I will” “Please, don’t. Stop watching them”, but he couldn’t, he tried 3 thousand times and his eyes kept turning back to them. “Unfortunately, this isn’t an option” “Why not?” “Cause I fucking can’t, Jay! Fuck… Do you think I like it!?” “What’s the matter? You say you were happy to be completely free again” “It turns out I’m not” “What’s going on, bro?” “I miss her” “Do you?” “She made me feel… good, the best I felt the past 6 months. So,  yeah, I miss her” “And you’re going to sit here and watch her flirting with someone else?” “She wants a real relationship” “So what?” “I’m never going to date again” “Hee, I know trauma can be difficult to get over but… if you want her, you must face your fear before someone else does and you lose her forever. I know Ni-ki wouldn’t mind having a girlfriend, so stop waiting and go after her! ”. He closed his eyes, just the thought of Ni-ki and her being a couple and having them around as a couple was killing him inside, but he couldn’t be in a serious relationship, not after everything Karina did to him. He opened his eyes to tell Jay he was going to leave, but he saw Ni-ki bending down and whispering something in her ear. And worse, she giggled, then nodded, which impulsed Heeseung to stand up and walk towards them. Then, he grabbed her wrist and dragged her to the bathroom, ignoring all her protests. 
“What the fuck, Heeseung?!”, he didn’t say anything, “You’re being fucking ridiculous just like your brother. He did the exact same thing, forced me into a bathroom with him and did things I didn’t want to!” “Don’t compare me with Taemin. He’s a piece of shit” “You’re exactly like him, asshole. He just wanted to have fun with me, so did you!”. He was facing a window, she couldn’t see his face, so she didn’t know he was crying till he sniffed, rubbed his nose with his point and middle fingers before turning to her and saying with a weak voice “Shut up…” her furrow faded away instantly, her face relaxed, she didn’t know what was worse: his shaky voice, his swollen eyes or the sadness he was carrying in his gaze. She walked toward the Korean man “Oh, my God, Hee! Are you actually crying?” he nodded “Why!? I know I was rude, but, didn't mean to make you cry”, he didn’t say anything “Hee, talk to me…” he cleaned his throat “I…” he paused “Don’t…” “Don’t what?” “Pick him. Pick me” his voice failed again, he only had strength left to beg “Please” she frowned again “We already talked about it. If you’re not willing to take things seriously, you should let me go”, he didn’t say anything again, “Are you going to make things serious between us?”. He looked at her, she was waiting for an answer with a question mark expression printed on her face. “Fuck it” he said, grabbing her nape and pulling her for a kiss. A messy kiss cause he was a fucking big mess at the moment. He spent the last 3 hours thinking about the possibility of her lips being touched by Ni-ki’s lips and he was going crazy about it. So, yeah, he might be fucking rude in his perspective for just kissing her with roughness and without her consent, but he didn’t fucking care at that point. 
All that mattered at that moment was the grip on his hair, her jawline being cupped by his big hands, those heavenly pieces of flash moving with his, the sweet taste of her cherry lip gloss mixing the salty taste of his tears, rolling down his face, reaching their lips and being absorbed by that act of love. Then suddenly, her hands moved from his hair to the hem of his t-shirt and started to run over his bare chest. In that moment, his conscience hitted him and he broke the kiss, stepping back “I’m so sorry. I….”, she looked up at him, searching for some hope, a small sign which would show her that, yes, he was going to fight with his own demons for her, for them. He rubbed the skin of her cheek, smiled, then nodded, “I’m doing anything for you, babygirl”. She smiled at him, maybe this time, he wasn’t going to run away anymore. 
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angstywaifu · 1 month ago
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Black Dahlia - 20. A Painful Touch (Garrick)
Summary: Dahlia now with a new signet must learn to navigate day to day life with it. Something she might come to learn the hard way after a certain interaction. A/N: As we do not know Garrick's signet yet, I am basing his signet off a heavily assumed theory. I didn't want to wait till January/February next year to post this, so if Onyx Storm contradicts the below, were just going to pretend it didn't so we don't wreck the next few parts.
Warnings: There are some mentions of a pass incident, as well as a confronting moment. It is nothing major, but I'd rather mention this before posting the below just incase. Potential for a signet spoiler depending on Onyx Storm content. Garrick Tavis x OC (Dahlia Aetos)
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Challenges had finally started back up after a few months off. It was easy to tell everyone was excited for it, itching to get back to it. Sure we’d had training sessions here and there, but nothing beat the thrill of challenges.
I’d been tempted to take Dahlia up on the challenge she’d laid out for me, clearly thinking I wouldn’t follow through. One day I would. But today wasn’t that day. Mainly because she was nowhere to be seen. I hadn’t caught a glimpse of her all day. The last time I’d seen her had been last night as Bodhi had lead her out of this very room.
I hadn’t caught Bodhi to ask him what had happened, Xaden giving him the night off instead of coming on the supply run like he was meant to. I’d tried to ask Xaden about it but he said Bodhi wouldn’t tell him anything when he ran into him when he came back from the healers Quadrant. Without Dahlia. Meaning what ever had happened had earned her an overnight stay over there. I scan the crowd and see Bodhi standing with Xaden and the rest of his squad, riders easily moving out of my way as I make my way over to them.
“So you going to tell us what happened last night?” I ask as I take the empty spot next to him as Xaden gets called up for a challenge.
Bodhi sighs and shrugs his shoulders. “It’s fine, just a training accident. You know what can happen when signets start manifesting.”
“Yes I’m aware.” I say, heavily hinting all too well my experience with it. “But it can’t be fine. Because last time I checked she didn’t come back with you last night, and I haven’t seen her all day.”
“You worried about her?” He teases with a smirk.
“No.” I scoff. “Merely an observation.”
“Who are we worried about?” I stiffen as her voice meets my ears.
Seconds later a she appears next to Bodhi, looking as she normally does. No sign of injury, and acting completely normal.
“Oh we were just-“
“Durran! Are you deaf? You’re up.” Emetterio calls out cutting Bodhi off.
I breathe a sigh of relief as Bodhi rushes off to his challenge, unable to out me for asking about her. I half expect her to walk off now Bodhi wasn’t here, but she doesn’t move. Her attention now on the challenges taking place.
“So do I have the honour of you challenging me and getting to make a fool of you today?” Her question surprising me as I look down at her, a slight smirk on her lips.
I chuckle and shake my head. “Not today, figured I’d go easy on you and let you settle back into challenges before I make a fool out of you and prove you wrong.”
She looks up at me and scoffs, but I can see how she tries to hold back a smile, the corner of her lip twitching ever so slightly. Maybe Bodhi was right. Maybe she did just need time.
“Aetos!” Her head whips towards Emetterio. “Not you Dain. Bloody hell. Dahlia you’re up next.”
She nods at him before undoing her jacket, sliding it off her arms to reveal her training gear. Despite the temperature she’s wearing a sleeveless top today. The first time I’d seen her in one since before threshing. And now I see why. Her dragon relic takes up the entirety of her arm. The blue marking wrapping around her arm. And I can’t help but think of the rebellion marks some of us bear.
I’m startled from my thoughts as she shoves the jacket into my arms. “Make yourself useful and hold this for me.” A sassy tone to her voice as she pats my arm before walking away.
I can’t help but look down at my arm where she touched me. Stunned by the way it had felt when she’d touched me. Almost as if a spark had formed, and I couldn’t help but want to crave her touch again. No. I was not craving her. I might not think she was as bad as I once thought but I did not crave her.
I look up to see her start circling her opponent. I note how Emmetiro had paired up first years without signets together, probably hoping to lessen any injuries and casualties. Good luck with that. I’d seen plenty of singers manifest during training and challenges. The higher intensity and pressure generally bringing them to the surface. It’s how I’d found out about mine. Everytime I thought about it I felt like I could hear the scream just as clearly as if it was happening right in front of me.
I get so caught up in my thoughts I don’t even register Bodhi taking his place next to me. “Why are you holding her jacket?” Bodhi asks as he grins at me.
I roll my eyes. “It’s not like that. She shoved it at me and told me to make myself useful before walking off.” I tell him as I shove the jacket into his arms instead.
“Don’t want to keep it as a memento for your soon to be shrine of her?” He teases as he grasps it in his hand.
“What? Why would I-“
My words are cut off by a blood curdling scream. Everyone’s heads snapping towards the source. I almost think I’ve imagined it, as if I’m relieving the moment I found out my signet. But instead of me pinning another rider to the mat, it’s Dahlia. Dahlia who quickly scrambles off her opponent as she looks down at her hands in horror. Her face as pale as a ghost as her eyes flick up to the cadet still screaming and writhing on the floor in pain.
Emetterio and Xaden are the first to move, rushing over to Dahlia as another Wing Leader rushes to the cadet still screaming on the floor. Emetterio and Xaden try and talk to Dahlia, even shaking her to get a response out of her. But all she does is stare down at her hands, unresponsive to everything else going on around her. Exactly like me last year.
“Oh shit.” Bodhi mutters under his breath as he steps forward slightly before stopping. His eyes snapping to me and back to Dahlia before turning on me and grabbing my forearm tightly. “Did you touch her? When she gave you the jacket did you touch her?” He demands as he grips me tighter.
I rip my arm from his grip, anger flaring within me as if he’s accusing me of what’s happened. “I didn’t touch her. She touched me. Patted my arm before she walked off.”
Bodhi’s face drains of all colour at my words. I go to ask him what’s going on, but movement out of the corner of my eye draws my attention away. Watching as Dahlia rushes towards the exit, the other riders parting for her immediately before she bursts through the doors, clearly scared they would meet the same fate as her opponent. Xaden is quick to follow after her, rushing out into the cool winter air.
“What’s her touching my arm got to do with this?” I demand from him as I step forward, turning my attention back to him as my heart rate picks up.
“You’ll feel bad if I tell you.” His voice warning me, but fuck it. I needed to know. Clearly I was somehow related to this and I wanted to know how.
Bodhi sighs before hanging his head as he looks at the ground. “Last night Dahlia got her signet.”
Confusion washes over me. Did she have the same signet as me? No, if she did Emetterio would have kept her to the side till she could control it. The only safe option for her would be Bodhi as it wouldn’t work on him. But if she didn’t know just like I had, then it would be very possible none of them had any clue before she stood on that mat.
“So? What’s that got to do with me?” I demand, my voice raising slightly.
He looks up at me, as if he feels sorry for me. “She can use other people’s signets. When she touches them, their signet becomes hers till she touches someone else. That’s how she got hurt last night. She flung herself across the room with friends air signet. And that’s how….” He averts his gaze to the now passed out cadet being carried from the room.
I don’t need Bodhi to tell me the rest. My eyes going wide as I realise what’s happened, head snapping towards the door where she left. She’d touched me before she went on the mat. Her signet still so new she probably didn’t think anything of it as she placed her hand on my arm. She’d replicated my signet.
I’d done this.
@imtoanonymousforyou @simplyme-fornow @omalmal @lalaluch @wolfbc97 @leptitlu @fullmoon-94 @the-fandom-ness @fan-of-many-bands @awkardnerd @heeseungthel0ml @acourtofsmutandstarlight @fairchild06 @freyagallileaevans @pit-and-the-pen @hannraumari @elliot-rain @thestarseternaal
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lilgoblinbitch · 9 months ago
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The Archer Finds a Soulmate 𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔
girl dad!daryl dixon x fem!reader
a/n: this idea was offered by @yummymeee !! was trying to find fluffy daryl prompts and this one stuck with me.
summary: Daryl is a father of a young girl and has always had trouble trusting new people. When he meets you, everything changes.
warnings: none really, typical twd stuff, just some angst and fluff at the end :)
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Daryl Dixon was left raising a child in the apocalypse. He didn't expect to find himself taking care of a baby all by himself after the mother of his child ended up hiding it from him, and on her death bed begging Daryl to keep the baby safe. Of course, Daryl would love his baby girl till the day he died. She was the light of his life. She was the only thing left in this cruel world that reminded him of what made life worth living.
Five years after the start of the apocalypse, Daryl was extremely lucky to have been part of a large community that actually showed not only him, but his little girl, charity and companionship. All he wished for was a safe home and chance for his daughter to grow up happy. Because he never got to have a happy childhood himself, it almost felt imperative for him to manifest his own happiness and prosperity by giving his own kid that opportunity.
"Jasmine! Get outta that pile'a crap and c'mere!"
The five-year-old girl lay on her back in mound of dirt and leaves, swishing her arms and legs back and forth. "Daddy, look! I'm making a dirt angel!"
Daryl scoffed as he peered over at his daughter, who was collecting bits of leaves and sticks and dirt in her hair and probably covering every inch of the fabric of her outfit. An outfit that Carol had recently washed, because it originally got stained with orange juice and pudding. Unfortunately little predicaments like that were bound to happen to any little kid. It didn't bother Daryl, he just didn't want to put more of a burden on Carol.
Daryl stood up from the log he was sitting on, setting the dead rabbit he was working on skinning to the side. "Jas! Ya want food or not?" He called out, waving the playful child over to him. She perked her head up at him, her dark curly hair now decorated with bits of colorful leaves and sticks, almost making her hair look like a Christmas tree in some way. The child obeyed and jumped up from the ground, shaking off the dirt that layered her clothing. And of course, they needed to be washed again.
Joining her father by the fire, Jasmine plopped down on the log across from him and simpered at him. He smiled back after examining her youthful grin and spotting the smeared dirt on her face. "Ya got dirt on yer face, silly girl. Here, wipe yer hands and face with this." He handed her a towel, one that was adorned with pink and purple flowers. She loved that little beach towel. She snatched it out of her father's hands and hastily rubbed it all over her face and hands, then tossing it on the ground. Daryl sighed in distress.
"How many more things of yers we gotta ask Carol to wash?"
"We're outside, daddy. There is dirt, and you say dirt makes us dirty. So it's got to make everything else dirty, right?" Her enthusiasm never failed to make him grin and forget what he was even upset at her about.
"A'ight, watch me, ready?" Daryl grabbed the dead rabbit and continued skinning it, making sure Jasmine was watching him. Her face contorted in disgust.
"I don't wanna do that, daddy! It's gross and it hurts the rabbit."
He ignored her complaining and continued skinning it. "It's dead already. Didn't feel any pain, I promise," he reassured the child. "I just needed to show ya how yer dad makes yer all-time favorite food: rabbit stew."
The little girl shook her head. "No, my favorite food is Carol's cookies, and the Kingdom's cobbler!"
Daryl rolled his eyes, finishing up skinning the rabbit and then sticking it on a stick and placing it over the fire. Throughout their meal, Daryl told her about the time he first ever had to eat rabbit, and how he was around her age. His daughter was always absolutely thrilled to hear stories, especially from her father. She admired him more than he realized. And she looked forward to every Thursday afternoon, because that's when Daryl took her out for walks in the woods, pointing out various plants and showing her how to differentiate between animal tracks and walker tracks. Of course, she was too young to fully understand everything he taught her, but it made him more comfortable knowing that she was learning early on.
Some nights Daryl lay awake, tossing and turning only to say "fuck it" and go out in the woods where he could ease his mind, while his daughter was already fast asleep in the room across the hall. He loved being alone in the woods; just him and no one else to disturb him for a few hours.
However, one night he ended up acquiring company from an unexpected individual: you. Daryl didn't know very much about you, besides the fact that you joined Alexandria not too long after he and his group did. You were quiet and reserved, always keeping to yourself and never being found in large crowds because you were always more content when alone. Daryl often found himself following you into the woods to see what you even did out there, but you were just too quick to spy on. And truthfully, you were afraid of Daryl. You had seen how similar he was to you in some ways; his love for nature and serenity and the comfort of being isolated from the loudness of the community you lived in. You observed him going into the woods and not coming back out for hours, just as you did. He ended up becoming a valued member of Alexandria as he helped Aaron recruit new members to the community. He was becoming more outspoken than you, and that seemed to make you nervous.
Tonight, curiosity got the best of you and you decided to go and see what it was that Daryl the archer father did late at night in the woods, all alone.
Daryl did not anticipate anyone to be as good of a tracker as he was, especially in the dark of night. But being the daughter of a hunter father ended up advantaging you with that skill. So when he heard footsteps and prepared to send an arrow flying and landing between the eyes of a walker, but ended up being face to face with you, he was surprised to say the least.
"Hey, um, Daryl right?" Your flashlight beamed onto his face, and he squinted. "Sorry," you turned it off and shoved it in your pocket, "I just, um...I always see you out here, and I'm always out here, so..."
"So what?" Daryl wasn't in the mood for visitors, especially not annoyingly beautiful women such as yourself. You made him nervous.
Daryl kicked the dirt around with his feet, not looking up at you as you continued to speak to him. "Look, I'm not really a people person, and you probably want nothing to do with me because I never talked to you before...but I–" you stopped to look down at the dirt and shuffle your feet in it as well, involuntarily mimicking Daryl. "I dunno, I just need a friend, I think."
You could feel Daryl's eyes on you now, the glow of the small fire illuminating his auburn hair and the specks of hair on his beard. You swallowed hard, becoming a nervous wreck under his hard gaze. "Why me?" Was all he managed to say after studying your face. You finally made eye contact with him after mustering up the courage to do so. He had pretty eyes.
"Because I think we're alike in a lot of ways." You tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear and leaned against the thick tree beside you. "And honestly, you're one of the only people I know of that has better tracking skills than me," you added, voice soft and unsure. Unsure of what the mysterious man in front of you was thinking. It seemed like he had so much going on in his head all the time, and that's because he did. His thoughts raced, thoughts about you and how pretty you looked under the sparkling fire and why the hell you were talking to a loser single dad like him.
But you didn't see him like that. You were intimidated by him – always have been, except this time he intimidated you in a way you never expected. He made you want to open up to him, because you could tell now that he was just like you. You went your whole life never wanting to be seen by anyone, but Daryl changed that.
Daryl's lack of words left you in your thoughts once again. What if that was his sign for you to scram? What if he hated you? What if he thought you were a fucking creep for sneaking up on him in the middle of the night in the woods? You couldn't handle the fear of rejection so you took matters into your own hands.
Sighing in defeat, you turned on your heal and started for the other direction back to Alexandria, until you were abruptly stopped in your tracks.
"Wait."
Daryl did not wish for you to leave. He believed you. You were like him. "Ya wanna come hunting?"
Your eyes lit up in elation, and you smiled at him. "Yeah, I'd love to."
After a only a few weeks, you and Daryl became friends. He properly introduced you to his daughter Jasmine, who when meeting you for the first time told you, "You're pretty!" It melted your heart. Yours and Daryl's friendship grew drastically from then on. You respected him a lot, as he did you. The two of you were able to teach each other things about nature and hunting that the other had no clue about; you taught Daryl which herbs were best for different things, and he taught you how to shoot with a crossbow. Of course, your bow and arrow and your dagger were just enough for you already, but it pleased you to know that Daryl actually wanted to teach you.
Soon enough it was evident that you and Daryl were growing a deeper connection than the two of you originally anticipated. But somehow you weren't scared of it. You felt content around him, and it was clear that he felt that way about you, too.
"Jasmine!" Daryl called out, frantically searching the woods for his pesky little daughter. The sun was setting over the tree line ahead of him, clouds painted orange and pink. It was going to be dark soon, and he had no idea where his daughter had run off to.
Daryl found his feet moving on their own, eyes shifting around his surroundings while he attempted to track the footsteps of his daughter. "Jas! C'mon let's go!" Suddenly the sound of a twig snapping filled the air. His heartbeat quickened, and his paternal instincts kicked in. He raced toward the sound, crossbow at the ready.
He was just about ready to shoot whatever was hiding behind the tree but when he saw you walking with Jasmine he stopped in his tracks, lowering his weapon. You and Jasmine both glanced up at him simultaneously, and the little girl ran up to her father and hugged him. A sigh of relief overcame him as he bent down to hug her back. You beamed down at the two of them, admiring how touching the sight was.
"Where were ya?" Daryl stood back up, moving his focus between both you and his daughter. You could tell he was trying his hardest to stay calm, but the fact that his daughter was running off in the woods without him made him feel uneasy and on edge.
"Don't worry, I found her by a stream back there. She told me she wanted to learn how to catch frogs," you reassured him. He grinned and looked down at the girl, who was carrying a red bucket full of croaking amphibians.
"Look how many I caught, daddy!" She lifted the bucket up to Daryl and he peered into it. "Well someone's a professional frog catcher now, ey?" He teased.
The three of you reached the gates and Jasmine hurriedly ran down the street to the other kids outside. You smiled and turned to Daryl, who was already staring at you. You blushed and looked down at your feet.
"Sorry, I should have told you she was with me. She just seemed so excited and I couldn't say no, so–"
"Nah. Don't need to apologize," he interrupted, reaching his hand up to brush a strand of hair out of his face. "I, uh, thank you, fer watchin' her."
A gentle breeze drifted through your hair and you brushed stray strands out of your face, all the while Daryl shifted his weight and gathered the pith to express his feelings at that moment. He needed to get it off his chest.
Your doe eyes only impelled him further.
"Uh..." his anxious eyes finally met your passionate ones. "I think Jas might enjoy having ya over fer dinner t'night."
This time you tittered, nodding your head enthusiastically. "If this is your way of wanting more of my company, just say it, Daryl." Your face muscles seriously ached from smiling so hard. "I... I like you. And I would love to come over, honestly, any time."
Daryl's face flushed a shade of pink you'd never seen on him before. It made you giddy. "I like ya too."
That moment felt so cliche – it felt like you and Daryl were part of a silly teenage romcom film. But you two earned that cliche moment. You were surprisingly capable of harvesting a healthy connection with someone who really meant a lot to you.
The magnetic pull between the two of you grew stronger and stronger, reeling your body closer to his. Your hand instinctively brushed against his, making Daryl's insides mushy.
A smirk ran across yours lips and you grabbed Daryl's hand firmly. "C'mon, let's go make some food for tonight."
That evening you cooked venison stew for Daryl and his daughter, by gratitude of the huge buck Daryl scored earlier that morning. Secretly you loved to cook, but you'd only ever cook for someone who was special to you; back in the day you'd always cook for your father after he'd go out hunting and bring back game that gave you an opportunity to create a mouth-watering recipe. Today, that special someone was Daryl. You truly believed he deserved a decent meal from you after everything he'd done for you. He won your trust and respect – even more so your love.
"Thank you."
Daryl was sprawled out on the couch, staring up at you as you had finished cleaning up the dishes. He had already tucked Jasmine into bed up stairs, afterward coming back down to gawk at you.
You wiped your hands on a towel and set it on the counter, turning your attention the the comfortable man on the couch. "No need to thank me. I wanted to cook for you." You joined him on the couch, drowning in the soft cushion and taking in the homey vibe of his living room.
He sat up, turning his body toward you. That expression was painted on his face again – the one that told you he was doubting himself, or that he was trying really hard to articulate his emotions. You took his hands in yours, a decision that caught Daryl by surprise. "You don't need to doubt yourself anymore. I know what you're feeling, trust me."
Your reassurance kindled the spark of courage Daryl so desperately needed. It was as if you were his god, his creator – the one to send him the message from the sky to tell him it was his time to listen to his heart. And so he did.
The archer's rough, calloused fingers traced shapes over the dry skin of your hands. Your gaze melted him like plastic by the fire, and the words your spoke to him spilled from your lips like a prayer.
"Kiss me, Daryl."
Carefully Daryl parted his lips while searching your face for any uncertainties; there were none. And so he kissed you. He kissed you like you were a porcelain doll, suppressing his strength as to not break you. He wanted this kiss to last forever, and so did you.
Daryl trusted his gut that you were the one for him, and boy was that the best decision he ever made right there and then.
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hoarderheart · 16 days ago
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How come you always have a boyfriend? How come you only want what you can’t have? Whoa. I know what I want, but I can’t have it. Besides you don’t want me, you just like too flirt. You’re just a complex manifestation of his memories designed to keep him distracted. The fantasy was far too real. No, guys, this is my life, this is the dream. It’s just a dream. Look, I have no illusions, okay? The life I live… It’s a lot of things, but it’s rarely happy. You know what? I'm a realist. I don't see much hope for us. No strings attached. Well, I’ve seen much stranger things happen. Damn, it’s good to see you. A hell of a lot stranger. Anything? Oh, sweet. Almost anything. He’s dead, all the way dead. Because of you. I’ll see you…I will. Is that really you? Part of me always believed you’d come back. Welcome home. But you’re always there, you know? Maybe if you didn’t up and leave us. I left, but you didn’t stop me. I should’ve stopped you. You’re the best friend we’ve ever had. You’re my best friend, but I just let you go. Man, I hope you can hear me… I know you’re in there…I know you can hear me...it’s me. We’re family. The people in your life, in your real life..? You ask, what about all of this is real. You’re my family. We are. People, families, that’s real. Out there, we need you to come back. We need you. We were a family and I didn’t wanna lose that. I need you. I forgive you… I’m sorry it took me so long...I’m sorry it took me ‘till now to say it. I love you. And I let it slip away… You’re our brother, I want you to know that. I love all of you. I need to say something. You don’t have to say it. You don’t have to say anything… Wait, there’s one thing… When Jack was dying…I made a deal. To save him. The price was my life. They’re not gonna get anything from me without agreeing to a few conditions. When I experience a moment of true happiness, the Empty would be summoned and it would take me forever. Why are you telling me this now? I wanted you to know…that when I do picture myself happy… I always wondered, what it could be…what my true happiness could even look like. There’s things, people, feelings…that I wanna experience differently than I had before. It’s with you. Or maybe even for the first time. I never found an answer. Because the one thing I want…it’s something I know I can’t have. But I think I know…I think I know now. Happiness isn’t in…the having, it’s in just being, it’s in just saying it. Why does this sound like a goodbye? Because it is. Whatever you’re thinking of doing, don’t do it. Don’t do this. I have to… You really suck at goodbyes, you know that? This is a better goodbye than the last time. You changed me, Dean.
I love you.
Goodbye, Dean.
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I should’ve said, “I love you, too.”
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devilishchaos · 1 year ago
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Wildin', on a boat on an island | Rúben Dias Imagine
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Rating / genre: M (18+); smut, fluff
Pairings: Reader x Rúben Dias
Summary: Y/N and Rúben go on vacation..again.
Warnings: Explicit smut, explicit talk, oral (f receiving), unprotected vaginal penetration (don't do it!!! stay safe!), hair grabbing, use of pet names "baby", "babe", "princesa"
AN: manifesting this photos energy <3 enjoy x
Word Count: 5 871 words
This is a work of fiction. The story, names, characters and incidents either are product or the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events or locales or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental.
Your eyes narrowed slightly as you analyzed the shirtless brunette standing in front of you, your arms were crossed firmly across your chest. His eyebrows were raised as he awaited your answer, his back pressed against the kitchen island. 
“You are suggesting we don’t sleep together for the vacation..why?” you questioned, waiting for a decent explanation. 
“Because..my parents room is literally 30 centimeters from ours.” he explained quickly as he shrugged his shoulders with ease “AND I didn’t say that we can’t sleep in the same room! Just no funny business while in it..”
For more context, Rúben had asked you to accompany him on a little trip, on this beautiful boat on his family vacation. And has decided that now - an hour till you guys go on the boat  - is the perfect time to let you know he didn’t want to have sex with you. 
“It’s not like that has stopped you before?!?” you questioned him, with some suspicion still. 
“Babe..in the house is different. It’s a big house. Practically no one can hear us.” he answered with obviousness, it was a simple but logical answer “Listen, I’m going to go upstairs to bring your luggage down and put it in the car, while you cool off a bit, yeah?” 
You already knew it was probably one of the worst ideas he'd ever had and considering it's impulsive, spontaneous Rúben we're talking about..it was indeed terrible. 
"No." you replied simply, with no further explanation or motives as to why. 
Rúben looked actually taken aback by your answer, not being used to getting a ‘no’, not even from you. Though, he knew the only reason you'd said ‘no’ was to contradict him, and you, having no apparent reason to refuse, was an open invitation for Rúben to keep insisting. 
“Come on, it'll only be three days out.” Rúben insisted, using the nicest voice he could “Out there in the nice sea, with perfect weather, with food, drinks and a nice AC system... yeah? Plus - the boat has a double jacuzzi! Yeah?” he questioned you with a raised eyebrow, and at that, you shut your mouth. 
“I-”
“Uh huh, exactly.” 
“I can live without it!” 
“Oh, come on Y/N..” Rúben sighed heavily, closing his eyes for a few seconds, as if recharging his patience before adding “I'll give you whatever you want, whatever it is, I'll get it for you..after those three days. The only condition is - no sex on the boat."
That really got you thinking. 
“I can’t believe you. You sound really confident in yourself right now! Why do you think it is going to be me that is going to initiate something with you first? But you’re lucky that I love João, Bernardete and Ivan and would love to spend time with them. Have a great day Mr. Dias.” and with that you went inside the house to get your luggage because you are an independent young lady, who is not going to let things play out like her boyfriend wants to. 
*
In no time at all, the five of you were out. Rúben told you it would take a couple of hours to reach the perfect spot and if everything went well the fun on the boat could start in the early hours of the next day. 
It didn't seem like a bad plan, so you saw no reason to complain, it seemed fair. And if it wasn't so many days together you could easily ignore him. 
Rúben had kept his word about the ship's commodities, there were all kinds of snacks, drinks, and he had brought other kinds of substances. It was actually very comfortable and a part of you was glad you'd accepted to join them. But you still weren’t able to relax knowing your man didn’t wanna sleep with you. 
To say you were pissed at him was an understatement, but you were at that point of anger where you didn't even bother to show it, you immediately resorted to ignoring Rúben, which was very hard to do considering the fact that he was walking basically naked around you, only wearing his stupid short shorts that you wanted to rip off of him so bad. 
You had had your doubts about it at first, but now you were more than grateful that you had packed your swimsuits. Since you were giving Rúben the cold shoulder, you would have to find another way to entertain yourself; and being that you were in the sea and the weather is so nice, the most logical and comfortable thing to do would be to lie down on your towel, put on your sunglasses on and at least get a good tan out of it. 
Rúben, on the other hand, was annoyed with himself. He knew it was among the possibilities that you would get mad at him and do just what you are doing now, which is ignoring him completely. 
He hadn't seen you since last night, when you two had an argument during dinner about sleeping in separate rooms, which you insisted on. Since he didn’t wanna have sex with you - you didn’t want to tempt him..yet. 
Rúben felt his heart almost leap out of his chest as soon as he saw you come out of the booth, in your red swimsuit, the one that accentuated every curve of your body. You'd worn it around him before, and the last time you did, he fucked you in the pool. 
You seemed not to have seen him, or if you had, then you did a very good job of pretending he wasn't there. Once you knew you were within his range of view and he could see you perfectly well, you bent over to lay your towel on the floor of the boat, feeling the fabric of your bathing suit slide slightly over your butt. It wasn't much, but just enough. 
Rúben’s jaw tightened so bad he feared his teeth would crack, to keep from letting out a groan at the sight, he closed his eyes shut and gripped the edge of the table until his knuckles turned white; focusing on what Ivan was telling him, trying to get the image of you, bent over a few feet in front of him in nothing but your bathing suit, out of his mind. 
Rúben knew you were doing it on purpose, you knew how much he liked that bathing suit on you. But today? Right now? You were playing very dirty games with his head. 
No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't take his eyes off you. The way your skin glowed under the sun, how well your swimsuit fit and the fact that you were doing this to provoke him, caused his shorts to feel too tight all of a sudden. 
Rúben didn't even know what to do with himself, so he decided to go take a cold bath; he wouldn't give you the satisfaction of messing with his head like that. 
He excused himself and exited the small cabin, leaving Ivan, and you lifted your head to see him walk away. Rúben looked a little uncomfortable and you noticed how he slightly tugged the front of his shorts as he walked. 
"What, do I make you nervous, Rúbes?" you teased in a loud voice, causing him to turn around and flip you off. Without saying anything else, Rúben entered another door and slammed it shut. 
And with that, a little victory smile appeared on your lips. 
*
Eventually, tanning got boring. You looked down at your own body and lifted the edge of your swimsuit slightly, the tan lines were just the way you liked them, on point. Full of satisfaction, you gathered your things and decided to go back inside, maybe to take a bath and eat something. 
You entered quietly, not wanting to attract anybody's attention. You walked down the hallway to the bathroom. Just as you grabbed the bathroom doorknob to open it - the door opened. Out of the bathroom came Rúben, with nothing but a towel tied around his hips. You stopped dead in your tracks in the hallway at the sight, which you couldn't deny was very good. The towel was wrapped around Rúben’s hips so low that his prominent V-line was visible to a rather dangerous point, one you didn't want to let your eyes get to. 
He was shirtless obviously, so you had a perfect view of his defined torso and muscular arms, some water droplets still rolled down his body, making a path from his chest, down his abdomen and getting lost under his towel. 
His hair was still wet, framing his face perfectly. His dark eyes were fixed on you, and you realized, too late already, there was a little smile on his lips, prompted by the way you were eyefucking him. 
“What, do I make you nervous, princesa?” Rúben questioned you, using the same condescending tone and smirk you had earlier, as he took a step closer to you. 
You genuinely felt your knees weaken at his voice and the way he looked, but you were too proud to let him know that, so you simply shrugged. 
“Come closer and maybe I'll tell you.” you teased with a low tone, letting your eyes travel down his body. 
Rúben’s smirk only grew and you thought that finally you two were on the same page, thinking about the same thing, and more importantly, that it would happen. He took a confident step towards you, so this way he was towering over you, his chest barely inches away from yours, his lips basically hovering over yours. 
You placed both hands on his body, letting them travel from his abs all the way to his chest, causing him to bite his lip at the feeling. Rúben leant down even more, his lips grazing with yours, breaths mixing and skin touching. 
And then.. 
You pushed him out of the way and locked yourself in the bathroom. By doing that, provoking Rúben in that way and then putting a door between the two of you - you had started a silent game, in which you were provoking each other in an obvious way, waiting to see who is going to give in first. And you were determined it is not going to be you. 
After hours of playing tease, any slight contact or brush from Rúben’s skin against yours had you biting your lip to silence a sound and any look you gave Rúben with your bedroom eyes had him on the verge of jumping your bones. 
The staring game got a little too heavy for Rúben, so he stood up from the booth and walked to the kitchen, pulling out a cold bottle of water to refresh himself. You knew you couldn't let him get away with it, at least not without trying, so you stood up and walked to the kitchen as well, if he asked, then being dinner time would be a perfect excuse. 
Rúben heard you walk into the kitchen, but paid no mind, deciding to focus solely on his water, placing a hand on the kitchen island and letting his head hang low. Funny enough, the drawer where pans are kept is right where Rúben is, by his left hand, and sure as hell you wouldn't ask anything from him. Which left you with only one choice. 
You walked to where he stood, which he noticed as he turned his head sideways to look at you, and right when he took a step back, you found the perfect opportunity to slip right between him and the kitchen island, your body grinding on him, in all the right places. 
The sound of Rúben’s breathing picking up gave you a sense of victory, as you remained in front of him and bent slightly to take out the pan you needed, only to walk away right when you felt him harden behind you and the ghost of his hand over your hip. 
He really thought he had you. Again. 
Your smile of victory didn't disappear, not even when the stove wouldn't turn on and you had to resort to chopping fruit and hoping that was enough to rid your hunger. Now is when Rúben found the perfect opportunity to tease you back, seeing as you were completely distracted while cutting fruit. He slowly walked back into the kitchen, making sure you couldn't hear him. You were completely clueless to his presence, even when he stood right behind you. 
However, as soon as Rúben took another step closer, you did become aware of his presence. Very. 
“Oh, don't mind me.” he mumbled in your ear. 
“Rúben, what are you doing?” you asked, pretending to be completely unbothered, while the reality is that you're screaming on the inside. His chest was pressed to your back, one of his hands had found its way to your hips, and his breath tingled in your ear. 
And right there was when he reached out to grab a glass, which was on the cabinet above your head. The reality is that he didn't have to stretch to reach the glass, it was just a matter of raising his arm. But where was the fun in that? 
As he stretched, his body pressed even closer against yours, you could feel him hard against you, his breath now in your ear. And in an attempt to avoid his lips, you bent over, a move that only served in Rúben’s favor, causing you to bite your lip in an attempt to silence the moan that would come from your lips. 
You both were thinking the same thing. Of just how easy it would be for him to take you right there and then. 
But you wouldn't give up just yet, no sir, you still had one ace up your sleeve. Which is why you picked up your fruit tray and slid out from the right space between the bar and Rúben’s body. 
Normally, you wouldn't care if Rúben decided to just watch you eat instead of eating something himself, but right now it had you on edge. 
You and his mother were sitting on the couch in the booth, while Rúben and Ivan were sitting opposite of you, their dad fishing on the other end of the boat. Rúben was sitting on the seat in front of you, his legs spread slightly, his hands on his thighs and his eyes fixed on you. He was basically manspreading, occasionally lifting his hips from the chair to ‘get comfortable’, but you weren't stupid. 
“Are you done flexing your muscles?” you asked him boredly, raising an eyebrow at him. 
He opened his mouth to say something, but closed again as you stood up, his eyes followed your hand closely, especially when you drove your fingers to your lips and sucked the remaining fruit juice off them. The sight almost made him roll his eyes, but not in annoyance. 
“I'm going to the jacuzzi.” you announced, letting your eyes travel over him. “You continue doing that.” 
Even though it had not been an open or direct invitation, you knew Rúben had understood the innuendo. 
You hurried to the jacuzzi, taking off your clothes as the water heated up, you poured the bubble soap while letting your hair down, knowing that Rúben wouldn't be long in coming, although he wasn't hot on your heels to disguise how desperate he was, you knew he was coming for you. 
As you stared at the steaming, bubbly water, a wicked idea found its way to your mind. 
Meanwhile, Rúben paced back and forth in the hallway, running his hands through his hair repeatedly, especially when he stopped and had that urge to open the bathroom door where he knew you were. 
You're just a door away and what's holding him back is his pride. Knowing that if he opens that door, he's admitting his need for you. Proving that chasing after you is more important than his pride. 
He cursed himself for what felt the longest time before giving in and opening the bathroom door. The first thing he saw was steam. Lots of it. It made him squint his eyes while they trailed over the place in search of you. 
His eyes fell on the jacuzzi, it was filled with small bubbles, the room smelt like you, white musk scent surrounding you. And there you were, your back pressed against the side of the jacuzzi, arms spread over the edge, the bubbly water covering your body, stopping right below your collarbones, just atop of your chest. 
His mind automatically went places, but Rúben kept his thoughts at bay as he took off his shirt without a word. You did nothing but stare at him, your eyes following his every move, from the way he gripped the edge of his shirt, to the way he slid it off his body and his torso came into view. 
Rafe took a step closer, but he felt something soft under his foot, so he looked down. And what did he find?
Your swimsuit. 
At first he didn't process entirely what it meant, but then his eyes widened. 
You were naked. 
In the jacuzzi that's just a couple of steps away from him. 
And he was just..standing there like an idiot? Rúben was embarrassed of himself. 
A soft giggle escaped your lips when you noticed how flustered Rúben suddenly got, he actually struggled while taking off his shorts and if you hadn't been so amused by the view, you would have offered to help. 
Eventually he stopped fumbling with its ties and right when he pulled it down his hips, you looked away. Your tongue glided over your teeth as you felt the temptation to look, but you were stronger than that. 
“Enjoying the jacuzzi you said you could live without?” Rúben asked in a calm tone as he got in it, sitting by your right side. 
“Very much.” you assured, running your hand through the water, moving the bubbles slightly, you really had no intention other than to distract yourself from how nervous you were, still, Rúben tried to see through the bubbles. 
He couldn't handle himself anymore, he had denied himself of you for so long that he wanted you now. Told himself he was crazy. But now that he has you in front of him - he will do anything to have you. 
And an idea popped up in his mind. He knew this would be pathetic, lame even, but it would work. 
As you both did nothing but enjoy the hot tub and tried to ignore each other's bodies, Rúben discreetly slid his hand to the side control panel of the hot tub. Although he would never admit it, he spends so much time in the hot tub that he learned the controls by heart. So he knew exactly which buttons to push to disable two of the hot tub jets, the ones on your side, for that matter. 
Your state of relaxation was interrupted as soon as you stopped feeling the hot water flowing on your side of the jacuzzi, the vibrations had stopped and you no longer felt the soft massages on your skin. 
You raised your head and opened your eyes, noticing that indeed, the water stopped on your side. “What the..”
“What's wrong?” Rúben asked, his eyes closed as he did his best to hide a little smirk. 
“The water just..stopped?” you replied in confusion, not understanding why he was so calm. 
“Oh, that's bad. My side is just fine.” he replied simply, opening his eyes. 
You rolled your eyes at his disinterested tone. You couldn't believe that you had actually gone out of your way to plan all this and he couldn't even stop getting on your nerves for a second. 
Utterly done with his bullshit, you slowly moved to the little steps that led out of the hot tub, the last thing you wanted was to slip and embarrass yourself. 
However, before you could even reach them, you felt long fingers wrapping around your wrist, his skin was soft and warm due to the hot bubbly water. You turned to look at him, doing your best to keep your eyes focused on his. 
“Come closer.” his voice was calm, his fingers softly tugged your wrist; as if wanting to pull you closer but not quite to make you uncomfortable. 
You complied to his request and walked slowly to where he sat, the bubbles doing all the work and covering your body from his. You kept getting closer, Rúben slowly opened his legs, so you could stand between them. 
The feeling of the skin of his thighs against yours was your cue to stop, knowing that if you took one step closer, you'd feel him against you. 
His eyes bore on yours. The hazel color of his eyes was darkened by the lust running through his body, his pupils were dilated, his lips plump and red. He was one hell of a handsome man. 
Your faces were inches away from each other, but neither of you would yield to the temptation. 
You bit your lip slightly as soon as you felt Rúben’s large hands resting on your hips, the grip was firm, showing he wasn't hesitating. 
Testing the waters, you took a step closer and he let you, the grip on your hips becoming firmer and more secure, you could even say you felt him pulling you into his body slightly. 
Keeping eye contact, Rúben’s hand began to slide lightly, brushing your hip with his fingertips. His hand moved down to your thigh, where he caressed your thigh with his fingertips, drawing imaginary circles, which moved closer and closer to the center of your legs. 
Knowing exactly what he was doing, you felt fire in the pit of your stomach. You wanted him. And you wanted him now. But you also didn't want to give him the satisfaction. Maybe after all you were as stubborn as he claimed you were. 
You motioned to move your leg, and immediately, Rúben took a hold of your thigh, stopping you. A smirk appeared on your lips. Without saying anything, you yielded to his touch and moved even closer, putting your leg over his thigh and quickly bringing the other leg up as well, straddling him. 
The direct contact of your skin with Rúben’s, your core brushing against his dick..made him let out an agitated sigh right in your ear. 
And you would have teased him about it, but the truth is that the contact of his hard dick against your body almost made you moan. He was right under you, all it took was for you to raise slightly and for him to align himself. 
Ignoring how much you wanted to grind on him, you put your arms around his shoulders, wrapping your arms around his neck in the process, moving even closer, your chest pressed against his and your chin resting on his shoulder, wanting to enjoy the warm water a while longer before the inevitable happened. 
Rúben’s arms wrapped around your body, your breasts pressed against his chest, your pussy brushing just the right places on his dick. If this is the game you wanted to play, then Rúben would be just as good at it. 
He lifted his hips slightly and at that you couldn't help but let out a gasp, which you prayed he hadn't heard, but he did and it only fed his ego. 
As his fingertips caressed your spine, Rúben moved your hair from your shoulders to get better access and brought his lips to your neck. He started with innocent kisses, little brushes of his lips against your skin, while his fingertips caressed your skin. 
However, he was determined to break you. He brought his lips to the small spot below your ear, where he sucked, receiving an audible moan from you. One of his hands had slid down your back until it ended at your left asscheek, which he squeezed and used to push your body against his, causing you to grind on him. 
“Fuck..” you mumbled, throwing your head back out of mere instinct. 
He had so many dirty comments to make, but he decided to concentrate on you. Since you had thrown your head back, he had more access to your neck. He brought his lips to your skin again, starting to leave little bites and kisses all over, while one of his hands traveled to your breasts, his fingers taking one of your nipples and giving it a twist. 
At this you squirmed slightly on top of him, your hips moving against his, rubbing his dick in such a perfect way that it made him growl against your skin. 
“You like that, meu amor?” he murmured against your skin, voice husky “Want me to do it again?” 
“Yes.” you mumbled breathlessly. 
His fingers moved deftly between your legs, as you grasped his jaw and moved his head to the side, so that you could have access to his neck and an efficient way to quiet the sounds he would elicit from you. 
His index finger slipped between your folds, while his thumb searched for your clit until he found it, and began to give circular notions. You accidentally left a little bite on his neck, which was welcomed by Rúben , as he started to speed up his thumb and slid his middle finger inside you. 
“Rúbenn..” you murmured, your walls automatically tightening around his finger. 
“Does this feel good, princesa?” he murmured in your ear as his thumb accelerated his movements, he slid his ring finger in as well, your walls clenching at his voice "Oh it does, you're already clenching around my fingers." 
Now he had two fingers inside you, which he began to move in a come hither motion, hitting your sweet spot instantly, the one he had found in a matter of seconds. 
“Oh, fuuuck, Rúb-” 
He could feel you, how your walls clenched around his fingers so tightly it was hard for him to move them, your kisses on his neck had become sloppy and wet and your eyes were closed. Just when you felt you would reach the tip of ecstasy, Rúben pulled his fingers out of you. 
You were about to yell at him, but he spoke first, taking your jaw with one of his hands, fixing his eyes on yours. 
“I want to make you cum on my dick, yeah?” 
And you swore you could've come right there. Just by his words. 
“Yeah?” he questioned again, making you realize it had been more of a way to get your permission. 
“Yeah.” you nodded your head eagerly and that was all he needed. 
Rúben wrapped his arms around you and stood up, you instinctively wrapped your legs around his torso, biting your lip in anticipation for what was about to come. 
Rúben knew the boat like the back of his hand, so in a matter of no time, both of you were in his room. Rúben placed you down on his bed, not caring in the least that you were wetting it. 
He was soon close to you again, his lips on your skin. Your breathing started to become erratic, unable to control yourself in the face of the new sensations. His kisses traveled all over your neck, part of your shoulders and even on your jaw. 
Without a word, Rúben grabbed you with moderate force by the jaw and caught your lips with his immediately. You lost yourself in the kiss completely, the sensation of his lips against yours stoking the fire within you even more. 
Unable to stay still and wanting to discover your whole body, Rúben began to leave kisses and little bites on your neck. You tried to grab his face to bring him back to your lips, but as soon as you tried, he pulled away from you, took your wrists and put them against the bed, his face was above yours, the room was barely being illuminated by the light that was filtering through the blinds, so you couldn't see much, only the shadow of his features. 
“You want me?” he asked over your lips, his voice hoarser than usual and his breathing was rapid. 
“I want you. So bad.” 
You saw the shadow of a victorious smile on his lips and felt them against yours again, he put both hands holding your wrists above your head, and held both of your wrists with one hand, freeing his other one. 
His kisses began to descend again, with a slowness that clearly had the sole purpose of driving you crazy. You lifted your hips off the bed so you could feel some more of him, while Rúben took advantage of this and positioned himself between your legs with ease. 
He stopped kissing you momentarily, you could feel his breath on your skin and without warning, he returned his hand in between your thighs and now pushed three fingers inside you, while his thumb returned to your clit, you inevitably ended up letting out a moan, as his fingers had hit the right spot again. Having located the spot already, he began to move his fingers faster and deeper, curving them from time to time, accelerating the speed of his thumb as well. 
His lips went lower and lower, until his head was between your thighs and your hand was lost in his hair. His lips concentrated on your clit, sucking and circling it with his tongue, making you let out an erotic moan that you were ashamed of, because of how loud it had been. 
His hand kept up that incredible rhythm, but what made you almost climax was the feeling after he sucked on your clit and bit down lightly. 
“Rú- Rúben..I'm gonna-” 
That was all he needed to know to remove his hand, he would keep up with his word. As soon as he moved his hand away from your pussy, you immediately felt the emptiness, but you were too busy getting back to normal to complain. 
Rúben brought his fingers covered with your wetness to his lips and licked them clean, the sight of that, combined with the ‘mmm’ that he let out, was mouth watering. 
Rúben pulled you closer to him, so that your legs were over his thighs, he placed his hands on the sides of your head. His dick rubbed against your entrance, which brought gasps to both of your lips. 
He leaned over you and you could hear his breathing fast and heavy in your ear, it was almost like he was waiting for something.
“What's wrong?” you asked. “Are you doubt- ” 
You didn't get to finish saying the sentence, because he entered you with a quick movement of his hips, making you moan immediately, it took a few seconds to get used to the sensation of having him inside you. It always did. No matter how many times you've slept together, he is just so big. 
He stayed still for a few seconds, letting out hoarse mumbles of how good you felt, directly into your ear. Once you felt comfortable, you tightened your walls around him, which made him let out a grunt and start moving his hips against yours. 
You brought your hands to his neck and pulled his face to yours, bringing your lips together in a desperate kiss, as his hips moved incessantly, one of your hands tangled in his hair and as if on reflex, he put a hand around your neck, squeezing the sides lightly, something that made you moan into his lips. 
“How could you do this to me? All that teasing..I’m not made from steel..” he whispered in your ear. 
“Rúben, oh my God..” 
“I love you so much.” 
His words and the movement of his hips made your eyes roll “Don't stop, babe..please.” 
He pulled his face away from yours and placed his weight on the arm he had placed at the side of your head, speeding up his movements. You wrapped your legs around his waist to deepen things. 
You noticed that he started to slow down, but his movements still had depth. You knew he was doing it so he wouldn't tire quickly, but maybe you could help.  You used a considerable amount of strength to be able to turn you both around, ending up on top of him, while he looked at you with his lower lip between his teeth. 
Just to tease him further, you slipped his dick out of you and moved away, your body hovering over his thighs. He sat down on the bed, waiting for you to do something, but you only smirked at him. 
Rúben sat there while stroking himself and being done with your attitude, grabbed you by the waist and pulled you back to him, starting to fill your breasts with wet kisses and hickeys, biting your nipples from time to time, while you put your legs around him, slowly positioning yourself on top of him, again. 
You knew you wouldn’t last too long, anyway. 
“Stop teasing me, princesa.” 
“Where’s the fun in that?” 
He used the grip he had on your hips and pulled you down, entering you again, a hoarse moan came from his lips. You pushed him down by the chest so he’d lay down and began to move on top of him, in circles and up and down while his hands were on your hips and yours on his chest. 
You knew those moves were only satisfying you, as you moved as you needed to, and Rúben was quick to notice that. The grip he had on your hips began to tighten, a sign that he was getting desperate. Until he finally sat down in a rush, and began to move you at the pace he wanted, as the hand he kept on your hip guaranteed him control. 
“You're so stubborn, you know that?” he emphasized every word with a hip thrust. 
“Fuck, fu- fuck, Rú- Rúb-..” you weren't even able to say his name, or speak at all. 
You placed one hand on his shoulder and another on his neck, starting to move faster. He left sloppy kisses on your chest and you scratched his back, sometimes even left bites on his shoulder to stifle moans, especially when he murmured things in your ear, along the lines of ‘you're mine’, ‘this pussy feels so good’, ect. 
It didn't take long before you two began to lose rhythm, his movements were erratic and your speed had slowed. Until he finally came inside you, seeing the way his eyes closed tightly, as heavy breaths came from between his pink lips along with the “Fuck, Y/N, you feel like heaven..” he mumbled, was what made you climax too. 
While you both came down from your highs, there was nothing but silence, Rúben was still inside you and remained like that, after he turned you over, collapsed on top of you and you wrapped your arms around his body, both of you falling asleep without another word. 
701 notes · View notes
eveningepiphany · 1 year ago
Text
welcome to the final show | H.S, part 3
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my masterlist!
part one and part two!
summary: harry goes over to y/ns hotel for a good old room service dinner, also getting a little tipsy on wine, while starting to blur some lines. and it’s not long before things are no longer just between the two of them.
warnings: fluff, swearing, alcohol, getting a lil wine drunk, paparazzi, being confused on if you’re falling in love or just really good friends.
a/n: i’m so excited to finally have this written for you all! i’ve had some pretty bad writers block, hence the delay in getting it to you, but thank you so much again for your support and I hope you enjoy <3
———
There’s a certain type of attatchment that comes around once and a while. It’s rare.
It’s when things start to flourish. Maybe with a hobby, a passion, or a new found person. One your brain decides to put all its focus and interest on, to the point it’s all consuming.
This one gets stuck to you like glue. Hard to shake in the sense of no matter how hard you try to ignore it, it’s all you can think about.
Losing yourself in daydreams of something or someone without even realising, until you’re reaching for anything that will bring you closer to filling that need.
That’s exactly what’s leading you to be reaching for your phone at any given point of the day.
You imagine many perceive it to be a permanent growth on your person. But you can hardly help it. Texting is a simple way to reach someone. Feel connected.
So, safe to say you’ve messaged Harry more than your own family over the course of this trip.
You’ve become attached. To Harry Styles. Again…?
Of course, being a huge fan it’s easy to say you should probably already be accustomed to this, given your level of obsession.
But this is a whole other ball game. One that is becoming like an internal battle. Your already unhealthy and predisposed infatuation paired with now a real physical connection is enough to render you useless.
You reach for your phone. Text him, your brain begs. You consider. No, stop being clingy you loser, your brain rolls her metaphorical eyes. You place the phone down. Stare at a wall. Think about him. Rinse, repeat.
Not normal, you don’t think.
However, you search for some kind of justification. That you’re just good friends, and all that shit. It’s normal to miss someone you’re friends with.
If he considers you as that.
Which you would hope since you’ve been texting him enough it would be concerning if he saw you as just some mutual of his.
You’re also sitting in a cafe, unfortunately without him right now. Eating a croissant wishing that he were here. Allowing your gaze to linger on the chair across from yourself, imagining his solid frame filling up the empty space. What he would do if you stood up and ran a hand through his hair, maybe lent down a little so you could just—
The ring of the bell atop their entrance chimes and drags you out if your dangerous and spiralling thoughts. And for some reason get excited like you’ve somehow manifested this man to walk through the cafe door by thinking of him.
Feeling silly at the nag of disappointment in your stomach as you see an ordinary bloke saunter over to the till.
Maybe one you would check out, or emit some kind of interest in before you properly met Harry. You would feel disloyal now. Like the parasocial relationship has entered an entirely new level of psychotic.
If it’s still parasocial, that is. Or if now you’re just simply a girl with very cloudy and mixed feelings about a very beautiful man.
You audibly sigh out. Eating the final bite of your admittedly delicious croissant and picking up your phone.
You type out a message, sending it before you can even think it.
I’m in a cafe right now without you and you’ve honestly ruined them for me. I miss you and your free cups of tea.
Without me? Rude.
You laugh at his quip, watching as the little bubble pops back up indicating he’s typing.
I’m out right now, but if you’re not busy later we can do something? Go out or I can come over to yours.
You pluck mindlessly at your bottom lip with your teeth, how could you say no to that?
You stress over it either way.
well, you’re very welcome to come over to my hotel room. we can order room service if you want?
To this he texts back an agreement, seemingly keen. And you realise immediately you have to tidy your room before he comes over.
You swing him the location of where you’re staying, including your room and floor number.
Thank you love, ill be there in like 3 hours say? If that works for you.
At that, you stand, because who are you if not over-prepared. And it was time to go make sure your room didn’t like a war had been waged in it when he came over for the first time.
Cant be having a bad impression, you figured.
———
You did in fact rush back to your hotel complex. Not even stopping a crepe stall you passed by, which had to be a first for you. You clean the place until it appears well-kept at the least.
And once you’re finished, you easily fall back into overthinking the whole thing. So excited, yet getting those anxious jitters like a caffeine addict 12 hours no coffee.
Which is why you decide to busy yourself with an afternoon shower. And at the time you’d still had over an hour to go.
You take of course longer than you intended, and shortly after you come out there’s a knock at your door, easily making you jump as you tug a shirt over your head. Regretting the last minute decision for a shower since now you have wet hair and probably look like a right mess.
But it’s not like you can leave him out there while you go blow dry your hair, so you rush over to the door, and tug it open.
His brows shoot up, and a smile slowly blooms on his face as he takes in your appearance.
Your hair is still near dripping, and you stand in bike shorts and a loose tshirt. The most casual he’s ever seen you. Which he loved the look on you more than he admits to himself.
“Hi darling,” he smirks, a warm feeling settling over him as he keeps his eyes on you.
“Hey, Harry.” You stand for a few moments longer, finally shuflling out of his way to let him through the door. He is adorning a white shirt and has the cutest little bandana around his neck.
“I’m sorry,” You laugh, gesturing him inside, “I was drastically overestimating how long it would take me to shower… hence why im in this state.”
He pulls a hand from behind his back, a cup being presented to you.
“Don’t be silly, y’not in a state at all.”
“You’re joking—“ You gently take the cup from his ringed hands, “Harry!”
“M’sorry, m’sorry. I saw a coffee van on the way and I couldn’t help myself.”
“Did you get one for you?”
“No, but I did have a little sip of yours.” He confesses with a quiet laugh. But he quickly busies himself with your room, padding around and peeking out the balcony window.
You take a sip, watching him examine your space. Grateful you cleaned it.
He asks you a few questions about random things in your room, and you settle yourself on the foot of your bed, cross-legged.
You didn’t really think about the lack of seating in your one man room. But this hardly bothers Harry, since he’s scoped up the room service menu from wherever he found it, and sat next to you.
“Alright… what d’we have.” He talks to himself, opening up the menu and scanning over the foods.
You discuss the options, settling on a pizza and pasta to share, because, well, you’re in Italy.
The night progresses easily as time always seems to do when you’re together, and you fake fight over the best kind of pasta sauce. But he lets you have to last slice of pizza so peace is made shortly after.
“Should we order a wine or something? T’wash the pasta down.” He suggests as the sun begins setting.
“Why not, I won’t say no to some wine.”
That gets ordered to your door, and you go from the foot of the bed to lazing at the head of it. Sipping on wine and recounting old stories, or discussing stupid topics.
“Do you think the chicken or the egg came first?” You swirl your glass around, eyes shifting to look at his side profile as he gazes at your roof.
His cute nose outlined by the warm light off the lamp, which you flicked on in the corner after it got dark.
He bursts out into a laugh, “what kind of question is that?”
“I feel like it indicates the sort of person someone is.” You shrug, smiling.
“What like it gives you an intel on my personality?”
“Something like that.” You nod, “and decides if we have to stop being friends, if you answer the wrong one.”
He grins, “Well, maybe tell me which one to pick so we don’t have to do that.”
“Awh, so you don’t want to stop being friends?” You coo, still staring at him, watching as his eyes flick from the roof over to you.
“Of course not, who else am I meant to go on cafe dates with.” He laughs.
You’re both teetering on the edge of being tipsy, and it’s evident in the way you’re both talking to one another. Borderline flirting, probably a more fitting way to describe it.
“True, because I’d be very hard to replace.” You snort with sarcasm, taking the another sip of wine.
“You would be! I love our little dates.” He smiles, the second time he’s dropped the word date in the last minute.
You’ve scooted closer to one another somehow. Shoulder to shoulder as you steal glances of his beautiful face. Maybe this was subconscious, or on purpose. But you’re drawn to him like a magnet.
“So do I…” You flush.
“I’m a little tipsy.” You clarify, breaking the searing eye contact and looking at the near-empty glass in your hand. A fourth refill would easily tip you over the edge.
He lets out a quiet laugh, “Wine gone to y’head too?”
“Mhm, and I have a track record of poor decision making when I have too much of it.” You recall the plenty of times you did the stupidest shit just because you were wine drunk. Hoping that does not happen tonight.
“Might have to see it one day.”
“One day…” you agree, but you realise that you’re not really in Italy for much longer. You have about a week and a half left now.
“I… Harry,” you turn your body to face him, and he sits up a little, noticing the almost serious tone to your voice.
“I’m leaving soon.” You blurt it out, because it’s the only topic of conversation you’ve both been steering clear of. The thing neither of you want to address because eventually this won’t be easy to do. Who knows how many miles could get out between you.
And it almost hurts you to admit yourself because… where exactly does that leave you both?
Does your contact end when you leave Italy? Do you become people who occasionally text on a bi-monthly basis?
He draws a breath, “So am I.”
You let out your own tortured sigh, turning to pop your glass on the beside table and then lean your head onto his shoulder.
Your heart jumps at the contact, and somewhere in your brain, sober Y/N lets out a gasp, because she would never have the balls to do that.
So the wine maybe was a great idea…?
He wraps an arm around your back, “I go back to London after this.”
“Second week of August as well?” You pray it’s not earlier than the start of the month, since tomorrow is literally the 1st.
“Yea, the 13th.” He nods and it’s the only tiny shred of relief you’re getting from all this. That there’s still time left.
“I fly out on the 12th.” You say quietly.
But there’s a small silence that consumes you both for the first time since you met. Because you’re kind of exasperated for options right now. What do you say to someone who is going to inevitably slip from your grip.
You shake your head at nothing in particular, moving to wrap your arms around his shoulders, since words really weren’t going to cut it.
Somewhere in his muddled brain he notes this is the second time you’ve ever initiated a hug. And he leans into it, the arm he had around your back tugging you infinitely closer.
Your cheek is pressed to his neck, and you swear you feel his lips ghosting over the top of your head.
Slowly, you pull back. And he watches you with sharp green eyes. You hold that gaze, until he’s the one that breaks it. Stifling a groan with his hand, covering his face.
You look at him quizzically.
“I like this more than I probably should.” He gestures now between the two of you.
You chuckle, a tiny flutter in your stomach announcing it’s presence.
“So we’re making the most of the time left in Italy, then?” You put forward, ready to nearly wipe your schedule clean for the man.
Which, who could blame you?
“What are y’doing tomorrow?”
“Nothing, if you’re the one asking.” You laugh, and he smiles wide at your comment.
“Oh, is that so darling?”
You roll your eyes in attempt to be convincing, “of course, you always buy me tea so…”
“Well, that decides we’re going to another cafe I suppose.” His hand reaches for his phone strewn on the quilt somewhere, pulling up google maps to find some nearby cafes.
You perch your head back onto his shoulder to watch him scroll through the options. He stumbles on a beautiful looking one, less than a 10 minute walk away. He looks to see if you approve.
He peers down to where you rest on his frame, smiling unwillingly at the sight of you. Your own eyes trailing up to meet his.
And he swears they linger on his lips. Just for a fraction of a second.
“Mh, what d’ya think.” He gets out, voice suddenly several octaves lower. Almost gravelly.
You almost audibly gulp at the sound of him. Hyperaware of his existence right now, you could nearly zone out thinking about the strength of his arm muscle that’s right now pressed against you.
“Yea… yea that looks amazing. And tomorrow, what time?” Your hands fiddle with themselves in your lap.
“How about 1, since you’re probably gonna wanna sleep in a bit.” He suggests, free hand pushing his curls from his eyes.
The way he knows you’re probably going to want to sleep in. God.
“I’m down.” (Bad)
A smile erupts over your face, and you almost forget that the clock is still ticking. That you only have so long left here.
Which ‘almost forgetting’ isn’t enough to stifle the urge to use it as some kind of yolo shit. Because that is unbelievably strong. Like why not just invite him to stay the night?
Maybe another glass of wine and you can gaslight yourself into cuddling him and just falling asleep. He wouldnt leave unless he had to, so it’s an almost flawless plan.
———
The plan infact, was flawless.
To say the least, he slept at yours. In your bed.
I mean you don’t really remember it, since you talked into the early hours of the morning and drank some more alcohol to really top it all off.
You woke up under the covers, still clutching onto Harrys side.
He was already awake, scrolling on his phone, seemingly unbothered by the fact your head had taken residency on his chest.
You take the initiative to glance at the time in the upper-right corner of his phone, a little shocked when it reads 11:47am.
You do groan at the morning light streaming in the windows immediately after seeing the time though.
“G’morning. D’ya have a headache?” He asks with what you can only assume is the end of his morning voice. Which although just a taste, is enough to send you spiralling.
It’s also around now you realise he’s stripped down into boxers— still clad in his white shirt. What the fuck!
You struggle to form a coherent response.
“Morning. A little.” Your voice comes out as a hum.
Somehow, considering you’re cuddling him right now and you literally just slept in the same bed all night, both of you outwardly are quite relaxed about it.
Nothing is awkward. It feels lovely.
“I want a croissant so bad.” You huff, sitting up, stomach growling like as if you hadn’t eaten in a whole 24 hours.
“So, you’re the kind of person that’s hungry immediately after they wake up?” He laughs, hand coming to push the locks of your bed hair out of your face.
Outside of the sheer domesticity of that (which makes you literally have heart palpitations), your hair is a proper train wreck.
The humidity in Italy has made it horrific.
“I guess I am right now?” You reply to his previous ask, combing your fingers through the locks.
“Jesus Christ.” You curse at its uncooperativeness.
“Y’know that episode of friends where Monica complains about how the humidity fucks her hair, she was so right.”
“I love friends.” He immediately gasps, nearly jolting upright in excitement.
You laugh at his enthusiastic reaction, noting that you have to somehow find time over the next week to watch an episode or two with him.
“And if it’s any consolation, I think your hair looks great.”
“Yea well, it’s not like you’d really be able to relate to the frizzy hair. Since yours look so perfect all the time.” You joke.
This evokes a genuine flush on his face, “Alright, Y/N, calm it down.”
He’s laughing but you swear he actually looks a little flustered. Without the wine as a confidence booster, he seemed like suddenly he didn’t know how to take a compliment.
Unbelievable to you since he probably gets that many a day from strangers on the street.
“I, am going to get up and get ready then, so we can go out and eat.” You state, excited to be seemingly spending the majority of the day with him.
He holds back the urge to beg you to stay in bed with him, and says something nonchalant as if he doesn’t mind you getting up. But when you pad off to the bathroom he stares at your now empty space. And immediately shivers at the lack of your body warmth, despite the already warm humid weather.
After a few trips in and out of the bathroom you come out looking beautiful. And he has to get himself up and ready to go in attempt to not overthink it.
You craved his closeness the whole time it took you to prepare for the day. Every few minutes you’d get this almost overpowering urge to just go out there and throw yourself back into his arms.
It’s borderline pathetic. But now you’ve had him in your bed, his strong arms coddled around you, it’s very hard to not to be just that. His physical presence is perfect and comforting. You’re attached to that as much as any other aspect of him.
He puts on his pants, which were folded neatly on his own bedside table, plucking out the car keys in his pocket, “Im gonna nick down to my rental car, because I have an extra button up in there, so I’ll wear that out.”
He comes back and changes into said white button up, stripping his worn shirt off and leaving it somewhere.
Just like that, you’re ready to go, and you both decide to walk the short way there. It was too nice a morning to not.
The whole walk you’re chatting away as usual. But it’s paired with this newfound physical aspect. The way you so obviously want to be close it hurts.
Yet somehow you both act like it’s nothing. That the brushes of hands and shoulder as you’re in step beside each other is a simple coincidence.
And that when you get breakfast, the two croissants and shared cookie is just a friendly thing. In your head you’re even playing off the touching all throughout breakfast.
Which sounds dirty— but just the little conversational touches. Like a hand reaching out to touch a forearm in laughter, acting as if it adds something important to the moment being shared.
Or that somehow when you leave the cafe, with two takeaway cups of tea, the hands that end up interlinked softly between the two of you is just…
Well… who even knows anymore?
Because you’re walking through italy beside Harry— who is talking about his favourite kind of playground equipment, regardless of if he’s a near thirty year old man— all while holding your hand.
And to take a moment, because it’s important, his hands are everything they’re talked up to be. Littered with chunky rings and calloused fingertips from the years of guitar playing. Yet contrasted by his soft palms, which cups yours with this delicateness it almost brings a tear to your eye.
You also pray that your own hand isn’t sweating profusely in his grasp, because you wouldn’t put a clammy hand past yourself. The already humid weather paired with your anxiety surrounding this whole situation is quite literally the match made in hell.
Nothing about this can be passed off as casual to your brain anymore. You’re literally about to implode.
But you strive to hide it. So you solider on.
“I’m a seesaw girl okay. Hear me out—“
“No, I can totally see that!” He interjects, and you chuckle at his quick agreement to your statement.
“Right? They are so much fun. And even though I nearly took a tooth out playing on one when I was 7, I can still recognise they are superior.”
To that he laughs and bumps his shoulder into yours, “I mean I love that. I’m probably a swing person, I feel like no matter the age I will always be down for it.”
You can agree that a swing is a solid second favourite for you. And as you talk about that point with him, you don’t realise you’ve walked the whole ‘scenic’ route back to your hotel until you turn the corner and the entrance is around the corner ahead. And the way you went usually takes an extra 20 minutes.
It went so fast.
“Are you gonna head off or… come back up with me?” You ask gingerly, the hand not interlaced with his fiddling with the fabric of your clothing.
“Not sick of m’yet?”
“Never…” You shake your head, smiling as he gleams at your answer.
“M’flattered. The feelings mutual love,” he chuckles, “However I do have to go remind my family I’m alive. But it’ll only take about a day until they’re pleased for me to ditch them.”
Gently runs his thumb over your knuckles, whether it be subconsciously or not, “So tomorrow night ill come back over to yours for dinner if you y’want?”
You smile, a little sappy over the way he’s working a plan out like you’re both teenagers, “Yea, thats perfect, and we can try something else off the menu.”
“Maybe, if you want,” he begins carefully, “after that you can come over to where we’re staying. Meet my mum and sister. They’ll love you.”
Now you’re nearly bursting at the seems, “Oh, I would love that, H!”
“Okay, it’s a plan then.” He agrees, pulling his keys from his pocket.
You bid your farewells for the night, unlinking hands and being left with a tingling sensation in it, one that you wonder if he’s also getting.
You go to your hotel room and feel full with joy.
He is all too sweet for this world. And you’re a little obsessed.
———
Although Italy being in Italy feels like being in a bubble, and like you’re so far away from the real world, it is unfortunately a purely mental one.
And there’s one thing about a headspace like that, and it’s just how quickly it can be popped.
At midnight that night a notification pops up on your phone, one that when you open, you have to physically put your phone down.
harryflorals:
what do i even caption this post because is that who i think it is or am i officially delusional? “HARRY WITH A FAN FROM THE LAST SHOW, HOLDING HANDS IN ITALY!” correct me if I’m wrong YALL idek anymore.
And this time, there’s no grain saving your ass. Because this was taken on what, quality wise, looks like a digital camera.
Which has made it so painstakingly obvious that it’s you. And you don’t even remember it being taken?
It was when you were walking back from the cafe, holding hands probably talking about fucking seesaws.
And everyone has caught on fast, because in the comments it’s an all out frenzy.
So, cats officially out of the bag.
———
y’all can expect a part four considering i lowkey left this on a cliffhanger 😝 so its on its way my loves
update: next part, PART 4!
taglist:
@harrystylesgirlie @purple9950 @teamspideyman @rociolunaa21 @spiritofbuddha @lemonhrry @deamus-liv @Iquvlly @kuntxrgraudunkelbunt @hsfanficsrecss @hsstylesrings @saturnheartz @victoriasigaard @lilfreakjez @mrsvxder @skxawngs @theekyliepage @hannah9921 @shiffpring @multifandomsw @roslastyles420 @slutforcoffein @kittenhere @stylesfever @butterfly-lover @daniizstyles @padf00ts-l0ver @sunflowervol18
+ all the anons who sent stuff to my submission box, thank you to you guys too, all my love
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toomanythoughts2 · 5 months ago
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Dethklok Agere HCs: Pickles Edition
🍹🐙🥕🥁🎤🧑‍🎤🍺🫂🍷🍸🥂🥄💉🩲💳💊🚬😡💥🧨🖕💆‍♂️
I wanted to do Pickles 🍹 next because I think he encompasses a range of age regression that isn't your typical shining poster-boy version. I have many thoughts on him that I needed to share before the others. Nathan and Skwisgaar are coming up next, but for now, this is for Pickles 🍹!
Everything is below the Keep Reading tab.
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(Pickles, the longer I look at you, the more I realize just how fine you actually are. Like, damn. Anyway...)
🍹 Pickles to me is an older regressor. He's around the pre-teen ages, so around 9 - 12. Just to note, In "Snakes N' Barrels", the old musician that gives Pickles his first guitar said that he was "no more than 16" when he came in. So, if we follow his back story, this is around the age where Pickles was becoming accustomed to drinking heavily. So this is a very tender age for Pickles.
🍹 Like I said with Murderface, Pickles is an Age Dreamer, meaning his regression is voluntary. Pickles can learn to utilize his regression in ways that can help his mental health, but he won't be able to do that until he realizes he regresses.
🍹 Like Murderface, Pickles did not understand at first that he was showing signs of regressing until Toki.
🍹 Because Pickles is one of Toki's main CG, he did not accept or humor the idea that he to could be a regressor. He's been the caregiver for such a long time now that if someone brough it up to him, he would tell them to knock it off. Toki is his main priority at the moment and he needs to be there for him.
🍹 Like Murderface, his regression is not the cute, wholesome stuff that we usually stereotype with regression. His is linked heavily to his past drug and alcohol abuse, his toxic home life, and a very chaotic teenage and young adult life. Thus, creating a very violent regression output.
🍹 It was Dr. Twinkletits that first saw signs of regression in Pickles. It was during one of their own Rock Talks, where 2 and 2 came together. Pickles completely discarded him, but the fear of him being a regressor overcame him in the night, so he drank and smoked till he couldn't lift his head up anymore. The next morning, the thoughts were still present, so he decided to do some of his own research to make them stop.
🍹 How Pickles regression manifests is through violence and abusing drugs and alcohol. I'm not saying that everything adult Pickles does is regression in reference to this, but when it comes to certain situations and how/why he does it, then it can show cast regression. For example, Pickles started drinking at a very very young age to cope. Regression is coping. When Pickles drinks or gets violent after a seriously uncomfortable situation ("Fatherklok") he's doing it because that's how younger him would cope. Being violent came from the chaos that surrounded him, because no one ever listened or paid attention to him. He's violent because that's what got him answers as a kid, so when he beat up Murderface in Fatherklok, that was a form of regression. Same thing in Dethfam when he strangles Seth during his wedding after being bullied the whole day by him and his friends. Both of those episodes also brought up parts of his past, such as Seth being his regular asshole self big brother and Murderface reminding him of his own father and being neglected. Pickles only acted in violence and abuse because of the context in which he was in. In short, it was a trigger. Violence and alcohol abuse are apart of his regression.
🍹 Pickles can be pretty level-headed and the voice of reason when he wants to be. He can be a professional. He can follow his intuition. I think after his own research, he goes back to Dr. Twinkletits and demands to know what he can do to get rid of it. I think because he believes he has to be Toki's Caregiver, he can not allow himself to regress. It's not about being sober, it's about making sure he doesn't accidently slip because of his own problems when (he believes) Toki's problems are way worse. (Trauma Olympics) Dr. Twinkletits helps him but does consult that maybe if he confronted it and told the band, it would be alright. Pickles is very much against that idea.
🍹 He's the hardest of the group to admit it. It takes a good year before Pickles realizes that it would benefit him and the band if he did just come out and say it, because despite trying to "will it away" he keeps slipping back into it. He calls a band meeting and tells them, then threatens them that this doesn't mean they (Toki, Murderface, Skwisgaar) can stop listening to him.
🍹 He has a personal conversation with Nathan about it. He's initially scared by it. Doing it and not knowing about it vs. doing it and knowing about it are two very different feelings. Nathan gets it (Doesn't realize that he also regresses at this point) because he knows that caring for Toki and the band are what's the most important to him right now. Toki and the band are the most important things to Nathan too. But Nathan tells him that no matter what, he's here for him. They've stuck it out through all of this shit, this new piece of information won't frighten him away.
🍹 Toki and him also have a conversation about it. Toki is pleased that Pickles is also a regressor but also very worried. To him, he's scared that Pickles won't want to take care of him anymore. It's frightening to him, he just got his support system back. But he's supportive. Pickles reassurances him that he's not going anywhere, that they are a family. Toki jokes about when he has to take care of Pickles, he'll let Pickles have all the candy he wants, which is something Pickles won't let Toki do. Pickles honks his nose in response.
🍹 Stay with me with what I'm about to say. I believe in order for Pickles to get the full benefits of his regression, he needs discipline. And I don't mean a scolding. I think Pickles had a very real and serious conversation with the guys and Charles that a part of his regression is to do things that are "bad", be punished for them, but still be loved afterwards. He wants the feeling of being cared for enough that someone put rules in place for him to keep him safe and will enact punishment when those rules are broken. As seen in "Fatherklok", Pickles does bad things for attention (Punishment) but in his real life, even running away did not get him the attention he hoped for from his father. He wants to relive those moments, that feeling, that someone cares enough about him that they are willing to be the "bad guy" to keep him safe. While they do have a conversation about more positive ways of seeking attention and reassurance that they are paying attention to him, he's firm in what he wants.
🍹 That being said, I think the different ways Pickles can be disciplined are typical to a regular mid-western suburban up bringing. That means, he wants to be scolded, he wants to be spanked, he wants to be in time out, he wants to be grounded from his hobbies. What he does not want is to be smacked across the face or given the cold shoulder. Both of those are ways he was disciplined that are too close to the real deal. Now, when it comes down to who is giving out these punishments, it depends on the punishment. I think Nathan is the only one that Pickles will listen to in the band (He won't listen to Murderface, Skwisgaar he listens to a little bit, and Toki usually joins in whatever he's doing because it looks like fun.) so most punishments come from him, except spankings. This is where the band is divided the most. None of them want to actually harm Pickles or are uncomfortable doing it, so the only one who will do it is Charles. Charles takes this responsibility very very seriously.
🍹 All of this are just the details to a much deeper want, which is structure. Pickles needs structure in his regression big time. From a young age, his life has been so chaotic and unpredictable with drugs, women, and rock n' roll. He wants to be able to have a space where he knows what's expected of him, what's expected of others, that there is a time and place for activities, that there are rules. He wants to know there there is a hierarchy of people to talk to, that people know what they are suppose to do, with themselves and him. But most of all, he wants to be apart of the structure where he isn't neglected, abused, or blamed.
🍹 Pickles regression, once identified, also forms into a lot of tantrums (Do you see the pattern yet?) Except Pickles tantrums are physically violent due to fear of losing attention. Murderface throws tantrums because he's worried and anxious and misconstrues people's actions and words. Toki throws tantrums because he gets triggered from past events that send him into fight/flight mode. They all throw tantrums for very different reasons.
🍹 Pickles tantrums, while violent, don't last long. They are short bursts of anger, usually destroying something around him, then dissolves into instant regret and sadness. It's a rollercoaster of emotions for sure, the band needs to be there for him when the eventual fall happens.
🍹 Pickles has a weird feeling toward motherly figures when he's regressed. He has a lot of want for his mother, despite his mother not really wanting him. That same kind of desperation bleeds into his regression, but at the same time, he hates that feeling. He wants his mom to notice him, love him, comfort him, see his accomplishments. He feels weird when he gets that attention from other women when regressed, like a female klokateer or even Abigail (if she's around.) To him, it almost feels like "cheating". Like it's soiled praise meant for someone else. They make him feel "weird", something he still isn't able to pinpoint with Dr. Twinkletits. The band and Charles have all decided that it would be best to avoid female interactions when Pickles is feeling regressed to avoid these feelings until they can be identified.
🍹 Any and all mentions of Seth are NOT ALLOWED! It sends him into a horrible rage than ends in a crying fit. It's completely banned.
🍹 When he regresses, knowingly, his accent gets worse. The only one who can understand him is Nathan.
🍹 A lot of common midwestern foods cause him to regress and he will request those types of food when he is regressed because it does provide a bit of nostalgia for him. In one of the special feature DVD extras, Pickles stated that his mom used to make bowls of mayo for dinner, so I see him asking for bowls of mayo when he's small.
🍹 I see him wanting to do things that he didn't necessarily get to do around this age due to either his internal rage, his drinking and drug use, or his unstable home life. Like stereotypical pre-teen things like riding bikes or having sleep overs or having pool/summer parties. He wants to experience these areas without fear and anger (and Seth).
🍹 Further note, he also wants to re-do a lot of things in his past. Specifically, Birthdays. He wants to re-do his 10th birthday because Seth managed to not only take over the entire party onto himself, he was also blamed for another incident in the house, which caused him to lose all of his presents and privileges. The band takes this very seriously and throw Pickles the best 10th birthday imaginable! Pool party with a blow-up castle, hot dogs and hamburgers, a sheet cake with buttercream frosting, and lots and lots of presents! Pickles is so happy that he starts crying half way through "Happy Birthday". Nathan gets him an all access pass to a vintage arcade. Murderface gets him an original Atari 2600. Toki gets him an Easy Bake Oven. Skwisgaar gets him Boggle. Charles gets him Rock 'em Sock 'em Robots.
🍹 Like Murderface, he wouldn't use any typical regression supplies but does like to get into comfier clothes.
🍹 However, because Pickles' regression is tied so closely to drugs and alcohol, he does still do those things when he's regressed. The difference is how he does it. He sneaks. He hides the beer cans under his shirt and smokes his joints in the bathroom with the window up and the fan on. It's a split debate amongst the band as they don't necessarily know if it's healthy for him to do these things when he's regressed. Dr. Twinkletits reminds them at Pickles is fully aware of what he is doing and his hiding and sneaking his substances is part of the regression, than it's best to leave it be. If Pickles were to decide one day that he doesn't want to be allowed to do those things when he's regressed, and wants the band to intervene, then that is when they should do something. If Pickles were in fact age regressing involuntarily, then it would be a completely different discussion, but it's not. Pickles voluntarily lets himself regress, therefore, he's in charge of how he wants it. Though, Nathan has talked to Pickles about limiting what he sneaks because he is worried. They've come to an agreement that Pickles will only use what he was already using at that time in his life, which were your basic beers and joints. It's a compromise they're both happy with. Pickles can still sneak and his regression feels more authentic and Nathan knows that he isn't going to walk in on Pickles regressed doing heroin.
🍹 Like Murderface, he hates SPF. Nathan holds him until he's coated three times before he lets him go outside and play.
🍹 Pickles is a little self-conscious of his freckles and hair color when he's smaller because he was always made fun of for it growing up. The jokes "Red-headed step child" really did a number on him in the 70's growing up. Also a lot of Ginger jokes made him self-conscious as well. The band works on giving him compliments and reassurances about those features in order to make him feel better. Toki is the best at it, since he has always been the most genuine compliment giver. Though Skwisgaar is able to give him very specific compliments that don't make him feel worse but they don't make him feel good either. Murderface tries but sometimes they come off a little flat, but the intentions are always good. Nathan gives very basic compliments, but they're always meant.
🍹 Pickles will deny his regression to anyone other than his bandmates and Charles. He will not let word slip about it outside of the group and will get viciously violent if someone makes a claim. It's not that he feels ashamed, but more about having to protect his other titles. He also does not trust people to understand him and his regression and does not want people putting their nose in his business. He saw what it did to Toki (hated it) and will not let it happen to him.
🍹 For my fellow Trans!Pickles truthers, this ones for you! 9 - 12 is the age range where Pickles first noticed that he did not like what was happening to him puberty-wise. Now, Modern-Pickles is already decades away from that stage and is happily settled in his identity. But when he is this age, those feelings sometimes come back. He didn't get the gender-affirming support from his family, so he used other methods to achieve it. But when he is regressed, the band puts things in motion to actively support his identity. That could come in all different ways like Nathan helping him pick out a binder, even though he doesn't need one. He never got the experience of having someone help him look, or to even look in the first place. They up the usage of masculine words like "Boy" "Dude" "Man" "Buddy" "Pal" "Guy" things that would help solidify that position in the group. Skwisgaar takes him out clothes shopping to help build a new wardrobe for his "special guy" (He can't say this to Pickles with Toki around because it will trigger his regression and then he will get jealous of Skwisgaar's attention. It's inevitable.) Murderface and Toki include him as "one of the dudes" in their dumb shit adventures, like sneaking out to go drink somewhere on the property or go smash something with bats. Pickles is always very grateful for this.
🍹 He reads so many comic books when he's regressed. Like a crazy amount of comic books. Especially Conan the Barbarian, Marvel and DC, Archie, Grimm's Ghost Stories, and MAD. He also loves Sunday comic strips. He will read them with the band on Sundays every morning during breakfast. It's their little ritual whether or not Pickles is regressed.
🍹 Warning, this one is a little explicit (??) Not sure how to label it but it's not anything bad. So this next one is a 50/50 HC with me, depending on how real I want this to get. Pickles did not have a normal childhood AT ALL, so I think his regression is very very very different from everyone else in comparison to what they do. Keep that in mind.
I know, as a former child, that 9 - 12 was when I was starting to discover my body, so it's probably the same age that Pickles would discover his. I don't think it's imperative to his regression that Pickle's discovers his body, but I think it will happen given enough time. Like how he sneaks with drugs and alcohol, he might also sneak off to explore himself.
If we want to get real, his own childhood is probably riddled with transactional sex for booze and drugs, especially since he has been drinking since he was 6. Remember, he started Snakes n' Barrels at 16, still a minor and only 10 years after he started. He is most likely a victim in some shape or form, even if he doesn't see himself as one (I HC they he has a hard time referring to himself as a victim in relation to anything that happened to him due to drugs and alcohol.) That could very well translate into his regression, where this might be the first time where he feels safe enough to explore himself without the lingering fear and shame. It could also be tied into taking back control that he once lost at that age. Where his body was a tool to further his substance abuse, and not something that he could just have to himself.
All of this is not talked about with the band directly from Pickles, but Pickles does talk about it with Dr. Twinkletits. Dr. Twinkletits in turn, tells the band as delicately as possible that this could happen, and if it does and you accidently run across it, leave him be. Do not interrupt or stop him. It's an unspoken acceptance that this is just something Pickles needs to work through. I know this is a more controversial take with age regression, so if you don't personally vibe with this, that's perfectly fine.
🍹 Pickles does not want a caregiver like Toki, who wants parental care givers, but he doesn't want to regress alone without them like Murderface. Pickles wants a Big Brother caregiver. Seth is a piece of shit but that doesn't stop Pickles from wishing he had a cool, protective big brother unlike Seth. So the band are all of his Big Brothers who look out for him but let him get away with shit. They tussle and fuss but also respect each other and love one another. He especially wants the feeling of being protected by an older sibling. When Nathan or Charles might be gearing up to discipline Pickles, one of the others will step in and try to talk Pickles out of it. Or they'll defend him and keep him close. It's a fine line of wanting protection from a older sibling and wanting discipline from an authoritarian figure. He does get a warm feeling when they help him with something or pass down "big brother advice" or think he's cool. It makes him feel smaller and softer.
🍹 He eats Play Dough. I think it would be the salt inside of it. He also eats chalk and newspaper. Charles has him checked out in case he is low on vitamins and is trying replenish them by eating non-food items. He's fine, he just likes the taste.
🍹 He does the middle finger when you turn around when he gets scolded. The others find it so funny because sometimes he isn't fast enough to put it away and gets caught.
🍹 Pickles rediscovers a lot of old books he used to read as a child but never finished. He spends a good amount of time re-reading them and actually finishing them. He finished The Outsiders, Carrie (Personal Favorite!), Who Censored Roger Rabbit (Personal Favorite!), Jaws (I want to read this one.), and Are You There God? It's Me, Margert, which I see being his "guilty pleasure" book that he would read over and over again. The others will offer him snacks during his reading time or give him a blanket if it's cold.
🍹 Pickles is a whiner. If doesn't want to do something, he moans and groans the whole way through. He doesn't want to pick up his clothes or put his dishes in the sink. He doesn't want to sit up in his chair right.
🍹 He has one stuffed animal that he keeps on his bed that Toki got him. It's a stuffed dog named Max. When he's not feeling small, he keeps him on his dresser to safe keeping.
🍹 He demands to have sleepovers in Nathan's room all the time, whether or not the others want to join. They get snacks and candy and watch R-rated horror movies and sneak a beer or two. It makes him feel giddy and playful and happy. He's having the fun he wished he could of had as a child with a friend, while doing things he's not suppose to with someone who won't tattle on him. He's also a cuddlier at these parties. A part of him just wants to be held while he sleeps.
🍹 Pickles loves to drum when he's small too. He played the drums as a kid, so he probably used it a lot to get out his anger and frustrations. It's not good playing, it's not meant to be. It's just a lot of him getting out his emotions and going through the motions. Like that scene from Hey Arthur where Francine is playing the drums and singing at the same time and is god awful at it. That's Pickles playing the drums when he's younger.
🍹 They have caught him from time to time trying on his old Snakes n' Barrels clothes. Kind of like dress up. He's always shy when it happens but the others don't joke him too hard about it.
🍹 He gets along with Murderface well when they are both regressed. They're just similar in age enough to be able to play peacefully, or as peacefully as two young children can play. Toki, not so much. He's usually too small to really play with them and it triggers a part of Pickles that needs to care for Toki, forcing him out of his regression. Because of that, Toki can't be around Pickles when they're both regressed.
🍹 Skwisgaar and Murderface take him to destruction rooms to get out his anger. It works very well but it's a pain trying to get him out of the room. He wants to stay there forever.
🍹 Pickles feels very "in charge" of his regression. He doesn't like the spontaneous nature of it and really only wants to regress in a controlled environment, like Mordhaus, and with select people, Dethklok and Charles.
🍹 Legos. He will sit and build Legos until his fingers bleed. He had a bin at home when he was much younger but they got taken away from him because Seth kept complaining that he was hurting his foot by stepping on them. Toki and Murderface take him to the Lego store as often as they can to get new sets. They all sit and build together, usually watching something or listening to music.
🍹 Pickles has a lot of musical knowledge. He loves talking about different bands and musicians and comparing songs. Nathan and Skwisgaar are the best with these conversations, as they can keep up with him. They talk shop and even formulate some new drum beats during this time. Nathan refers to it as priceless.
🍹 He does have a curfew but he also breaks curfew a lot. He's suppose to go to bed by 9, but he'll sneak a little to stay up till 10. This usually ends with Charles and Nathan putting him back to bed, tucked under the covers tightly. Pickles finds it funny. As a child, he would have been smacked or yelled at for be up so late, but this was nicer.
🍹 Very rarely will Pickles regression dip lower than 9. But it does happen. It usually happens after talking to his mother, father, or brother. He gets as low as 6, maybe 5, but it's only for a short while. This is when he needs the most support.
🍹 Toki is very protective of Pickles when Pickles is regressed. He knows how hard Pickle works to keep him happy and safe, and he wants to "repay" that somehow by making his regression just as safe. It's a little annoying but overall very sweet.
🍹 Skwisgaar will give Pickles impromptu guitar lessons when they are alone. They both get a bit of nostalgia when they do one of these lessons. It reminds Pickles of happier moments in his life when his actual guitar teacher was helping him learn. He likes the act of learning from someone who cares about him. The gentle encouragements, the finger placements, the thoughtfulness. It makes him feel good.
🍹🐙🥕🥁🎤🧑‍🎤🍺🫂🍷🍸🥂🥄💉🩲💳💊🚬😡💥🧨🖕💆‍♂️
I hope y'all can see the vision I'm trying to paint here with Pickles. He is a very unwell man who just wants to be loved. I think I channeled him well. I love Pickles, my little octopus. Obvi, if you have any HCs of your own, tell me about them! OK, love you, bye! 👋
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cookiecrumble67 · 6 months ago
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something you all need to know about me is that throughout the day I'm generally quite unpredictable and get huge bursts of energy
An example of how this manifests would be you leaving the room for a second while we're spending time together, maybe for a drink or bathroom break and come back and be pounced on and have hickeys sucked onto your neck and my hands groping all over you, ignoring any cute little noises I get from you in favour of getting all my energy out on you
pinning you down or against the wall to suck you off unexpectedly, pacing around and twirling till I'm lightheaded and need someone to make me pant and shake and cum until I've calmed down, playing chase and whoever gets caught first gets fucked into the ground, letting you grab and bite and slap and pull at my body and doing the same to you just for stimulation, just anything to get it out!
if it happens when I need to focus, you can position me in the right place to do what I need to and provide background stimulation to help! or if you're busy I'm more than happy to do the same for you! we'll just be each other's free use boyfriends for when puppy has zoomies so it doesn't break anything!!
basically, I need a boy who'll let me use him whenever I need to burn off excess energy and who'll fuck me till I'm all tired when I need him to. Just to do as I say to make us both feel better than we were before <3
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