#thundercracker's just less of one

[devischaotic]

Been getting super into Transformers recently and decided to make up some concepts of my favorite three plane idiots for some stuff me and the bros have been working on. I'm an absolute sucker for the G1, Bayverse, and Prime designs, so this is just me trying to find the right way to stick them all together

[weirdlookingsnakewithlegs]

Do you have any hc on how the elite trine were as sparklings?

Boy do I >:3

Starscream-

As the youngest of the Winglord’s sparklings he definitely had to find different ways to get what he wanted, it’s where he developed his scheming and sneaky tongue

Often got into fights with his older siblings, the oldest especially

As the youngest, the Winglord(his creator) never really gave him much attention. His sire was probably different in that regard, which Starscream probably hated!

Smug af and didn’t really care much about the title of Winglord in the beginning, fought his siblings for the title out of obligation to tradition

He liked to sneak out to hunt scraplets on his own and definitely bit off more than he could chew a few times

Chewed the hell out of his creator’s servos when he first emerged, bastard from the beginning

Had a strong sense of heroism, it was shoved into the background after his first meeting with the Winglord’s council and it quickly turned from wanting to help outsiders to protecting the flock

Thundercracker-

Was born into a family of trackers, seekers that have a larger radar scans

He was raised to be respectful and polite, it somewhat worked, he’ll at least warn you before socking you in the mouth

When his outlier ability reared, his creator and sire more so backed off, not quite sure how to handle which lead him to not really understanding it himself- rarely he gets too worked up and goes boom

Took a very long time to fly, normaly seekers only take a week or less in human terms, Thundercracker took three, was a very big scare

Had the habit of biting people he didn’t like when he was a sparkling- he bit Starscream a lot after first meeting him

Very picky eater, his aft would not touch a scraplet and it annoyed the pit out of his creator

Fell in love with stories and poetry when he was a sparkling because his sire would read to him before recharge

Skywarp-

Would bite if things did not go his way, didn’t matter what nor who

Had a very loving creator and sire, they spoiled the crap out of him

Struggled with learning, especially when his mapping software and warp drive developed

Enjoyed chasing other seekerlets around because he could just warp in front of them and catch them, was never invited to games of tag

Was NOT good with being yelled at, one volume increase and that little baby would be in TEARS

Nuzzles and cuddles galore, and extreme cuteness aggression, he would get way to uppity and almost squeeze Thundercracker and Starscream a little too hard

Would often sit next to his creator or sire and busy himself with drawing on their pedes/legs, would do it to Thundercracker and Starscream’s chassis and legs as well, the only time he was calm

[smoothriverrocksrock]

Posting this so I can remember later but imagine this: multiverse Transformers crossover au with G1, ok? Doesn’t matter which so long as it’s with G1, but for example purposes let’s imagine it’s with Tf Prime.

You are TFP Megatron, and you’re discussing plans with another version of yourself. He’s unhinged in ways you could’ve never imagined and it’s inspiring. Your current plan is to use the Twin Towers (which is a landmark that doesn’t exist on your Earth, must be a dimensional thing?) as magnetic beacons and attract all of the Earth’s metal with them. While working, you hear Thundercracker say something. You turn around and only see Skywarp, Thundercracker no where in sight. You blink, and Skywarp suddenly morphs into Thundercracker. This keeps happening with all the seekers. You almost got a heart attack when you saw three Starscreams

You are TFP Rachet, and you both adore and despise the Arc. On one hand it’s so filled with life, nothing like tiny, empty base back at home. It’s also depressingly bittersweet, seeing other versions of the people dead in your dimension. On the other hand, you are going to have an aneurism. This alternate version of you is maybe probably dating Wheejack? It looks like he is? Which is making you consider things that could very well lead you down a dark road. This alternate version of you has also has ten children things. Well, he never *calls* them children, but he did create them by hand and also kinda raised them. So. Yeah. Half of them transform into giant destructive forces of reptilian nature, and the other half can fly and combine into a giant destructive force of Autobot nature.

You are TFP Shockwave, and you’re convinced something is wrong with this dimension. It is illogical on physical levels that continue to baffle you. Astrotrain has measured at different heights each time you saw him. Objects never seem to be consistent in appearance, size, or even color. Once you saw the Soundwave counterpart wearing a red Decepticon symbol. Your own Soundwave has been reporting similar odd occurrences, such as humans producing absurdly large objects impractical for their size but suitable for Cybertronians. Everything seems to follow a sort of Schrodinger’s cat philosophy, where nothing could be wrong until directly observed. Your counterpart seems unfazed by any of this, and keeps stating laws of physics that simply do not exist in your dimension. There is a giant green gem at the planet’s pole (ON THE SURFACE NO LESS) that controls the temperature and climate. How the fuck did that form.

You are TFP Bumblebee, and not only can your counterpart speak perfectly, but he is also twins with Cliffjumper. And all the Bots here are in perfect alliance with humans, and your alternate version can drive as publicly as he wants with his human partner. Which is… interesting. You are processing all of this with absolutely no jealousy, promise, absolutely none. You are so normal about all of this.

You are TFP Starscream, and you don’t know if you want to murder your counterpart or be him. He is in a similar situation to you, lacking respect, stuck in second place, and under the constant ridicule of Megatron, but instead of learning basic self preservation he just… stays the same??? You watched your counterpart publicly shoot Megatron in back point-blank, get his ass beat in front of EVERYONE (How does someone so prideful never feel shame??? Like Primus what’s his secret holy shit), and STILL talk shit the next meeting?!? From afar you think you could really grow to respect the guy, but the second you have to actually talk to him the thought disappears. His voice is awful to listen to, he keeps mechsplaining the simplest things about treachery, and he just??? Has some half-organic, half-mechanical thing named Dr. Arkeville in his lab??? You tried to ask about it and instead you got roped into a long rant about some Skyfire guy that you’re 90% sure is his ex

You are TFP Optimus Prime, and your counterpart loves to play basketball.

[artsy-hobbitses]

Is there a pet squad? It seems like every time I see something new about a character, it that they end up with a pet. So like the pet avengers or dc superpers version in ties that bind au a possible thing? Also who on both sides has a pet?

I DID NOT INTEND MOST OF THEM but animals just. Happen to some of these folks XDXD

Lesse...

AUTOBOTS:

Esmeralda the cat (Prowl and Jazz) - Jazz brought her back during one of his missions, Prowl basically became the dad who's like "I don't want pet" and a month later has her riding on his shoulders.

Dakshi the ovcharka (Kup) - Big dumb, big fun and big monstrous when you get him in the mood. Usually found roughousing with the Wreckers.

Molly the cattle dog (Ironhide) - Little dynamo of a dog, absolutely bouncing off the walls since she has no cattle to HERD NOW so she herds people instead.

Dunedan the Irish Setter (Mirage) - An old gentleman like his owner and Mirage's sightdog during hunts.

Avalon's Renaissance the horse (Mirage) - A riding horse who has seen better days and now enjoys leisurely canters with her master through the woods of Alpha Trion's estate.

Bigwig the rabbit (Bumblebee) - Is a gift to Bee from Optimus! Is also a right bastard to anyone not Bee, Bee's friends or OP.

An assortment of medical leeches (Ratchet) Many are named, mostly off famous vampires, and they live in a tempest prognosticator he had specially made for them.

A flock of pigeons (Optimus Prime) All are named and wear tags. OP doesn't have a favorite, and refers to them as his Mantiq Altair.

A murder of crows (Drift) They are not individually named, since Drift doesn't really consider them pets in a traditional sense, he simply feeds them and they see him as a human friend and bring him little gifts as such. However, he does refer to them affectionately as "The Crass Ones", because Sludge once asked him what these birds are called (he has some speech issues from the experimentation done on him and is working on remembering names of things around him) and while Drift told Sludge they were crows, he also told Sludge they were known as 'Karasu' in his language. Sludge misconstrued it as 'crass', became distressed and gently asked them to be kind to the nice man feeding them, and Drift found that so sweet/funny that the name stuck.

Tabiba the dove (First Aid) - A gift for First Aid from her uncle, Hotspot, when she graduated medical school.

Serpico the German Shepherd (Nightbeat) - Was the K9 Nightbeat worked most often with while he was a cop, and when he left to go underground/work from the shadows, he 'liberated' Serpico and Serpico chose to go with him rather than stay at the precinct. Is Nightbeat's scenthound and 'bodyguard' during stakeouts.

Lelaps and Boudicca the Maned-subtype Turbofoxes (Alpha Trion) - These were former sentry hounds of the Quintessons and were freed/reprogrammed by the Primes to help them instead.

DECEPTICONS

Old Fella the Pit Bull (Barricade) - Was rescued from an illegal fighting pit, and has long passed his best days. Was intended to be rehomed, but Barricade grew too attached to him, and with Megatron's blessings, decided to keep him instead.

Najmina the falcon (Skywarp) - Skywarp's pride and joy, and his scout during recon missions.

Buster the Jack Russell (Thundercracker) Your standard Jack Russell Terrorist so named because she would bust everyone's balls (her original name was 'Ballbuster') at Marissa Fairborne's base. With Marissa's encouragement, was adopted by Thundercracker who was feeling lost after leaving the Decepticons and needed an 'anchor'/something to care for while he figured out a new purpose in life.

Mollica the British Shorthair cat (Nickel) - One of those "there is a cat in my house, I do not own a cat" situations. This thing just sauntered into the DJD's quarters, almost slapped Tarn's mask off when he grabbed her and Nickel immediately fell in love and insisted on keeping her if only for her audacity. Her being around Tarn has not endeared him to her one bit

Graymalkin the Sphynx cat (Starscream) - Post war, adopted by Starscream as a companion.

[iluv-b-127]

GEN 1 CASSETTE HEADCANONS

WOW ALOT of people wanted this so I’m ecstatic to share my ideas.

Imma be putting them into categories due to how long this is. First off…

TRIVIA HEADCANONS!

Ravage will often scruff Rumble and Frenzy

Ravage will groom Rumble and Frenzy like kittens. They both don’t like it, but Rumble puts up the biggest fuss. Growling, barking and trying to bite. Ravage is not fazed.

Rumble barks and growls in his sleep. He tends to nap on Soundwave’s lap during meetings.

Rumble’s teething cycles were a nightmare. Nowadays he’ll steal and chew up stuff just to piss certain bots off.

Thundercracker has a soft spot for Rumble. Due to this, Rumble will listen to him about 50% of the time.

Rumble is an excellent tracker. It’s a common reason why he’s ejected from Soundwave, to track down certain signals.

Ravage is the bot who taught Rumble how to track. So she is called out less and gets more break time.

Rumble and Frenzy will bug Ravage constantly to play or wrestle. Rumble is the biggest one to plead for playtime. Mainly to Soundwave, Ravage, Thundercracker or his own brother.

Rumble will lie his favorite games are “for training purposes.” Like tug of war which the cybertronian name in my HC is “War Pull” for boosting his strength. And fetch which the cybertronian name in my HC is “Retrieve” for improving his reflexes.

Soundwave will feed all his cassettes on a schedule. It’s absolute chaos. Rumble is also a known food stealer. Once he’s finished with him and Frenzy’s shared food bowl of energon cubes. It’s not uncommon for Ravage to return to her food bowl to find Rumble sleeping by it empty.

Ravage is like the big sister to the cassettes, ESPECIALLY the twins. She can definitely get annoyed by their antics and treating her like a chew toy. But she’ll always go protective mode if they’re scared or in danger.

Rumble tends to copy his big sis Ravage. Like carrying his baby sis Ratbat when she’s in cassette form with his mouth (he learned this when Ravage did it with frenzy) giving small licks and purrs to Soundwave when he’s recovering, dragging enemies, etc. Soundwave finds the second thing odd.

Aaaand Frenzy will copy Rumble.

Rumble and Frenzy have the ability to shapeshift and camouflage into their surroundings. As it helps them as spy bots to get information.

AGE HEADCANONS

Ravage - Oldest sis. Everyone looks to her for opinions when Soundwave isn’t present. She’s annoyed/protective of her siblings 50% of the time.

Lazerbeak - Older bro. A lot less patient than Ravage when it comes to his siblings, besides Buzzsaw and RatBat. He’ll fly away if overwhelmed.

Buzzsaw - Middle bro. Has the patience of Ravage but the madness of Frenzy when it comes to battles.

Rumble - Second middle bro. Ankle biter, and SUPER protective of his two youngest siblings. He’ll go to Soundwave or Ravage when vulnerable.

Frenzy - Youngest bro. Ankle biter like his twin. He’s less of a biter, but more of a loud mouth. He likes being babied by Soundwave.

RatBat - Baby sis. Everyone is protective of her. She gets her screeches from Frenzy. She’s a bit shy, tends to hide in Lazerbeak’s wings.

( I know Soundwave has other cassettes but I’m going with the ogs-)

BOND HEADCANONS

-Ravage is closest to Rumble and Frenzy, just due to her dealing with them 24/7. She’s the most annoyed at them but is also the most protective. She doesn’t have any distaste for Lazerbeak, Buzzsaw or RatBat however.

-Lazerbeak admires Ravage as his big sis, but little sibling wise he’s most protective of RatBat and Buzzsaw. RatBat appreciates it, Buzzsaw not so much. He’s less protective of the twins due to the fact he knows most of the time, they fend alone.

-Buzzsaw admires Lazerbeak the most of his siblings, no surprise there. He’s got a bond with the twins due to their shared lust for destruction and victims to torment. Buzzsaw can get a little jealous of RatBat being cared for by Lazerbeak.

-Rumble’s bond is obviously closest to Frenzy. The two can’t function without each other. But he also heavily admires Ravage, even if he tends to annoy the slag out of her. If he’s bored or wore out, he’ll nap with her and smash anyone who makes fun of him. He enjoys Buzzsaw’s love for chaos and can be very protective of RatBat. Lazerbeak he’s more neutral with, you stay outta my way, I’ll stay outta yours.

-Similar to Rumble, Frenzy is most bonded with his twin. He admires Buzzsaw, and enjoys to give Ravage a hard time. Though if anything upsets him enough, he’ll go to her for comfort, if not his dad. He’s a daddy’s boy. Always wanting Soundwave’s attention. He don’t like Lazerbeak and can get jealous of RatBat due to her being the baby sibling.

-Last we got RatBat herself. RatBat don’t have it out for any of her older siblings. But she seeks Lazerbeak and Buzzsaw the most for protection. She finds Ravage and Frenzy a bit intimidating. She used to find Rumble scary until he showed more of a protective and “gentle” side.

Soundwave loves all his kids equally and I’m sticking with that.

Welp that’s all I got! If you made it this far, thank you for reading!

PLEASE REBLOG MY STUFF IF YOU ENJOY IT! 💕

[scribe-of-hael]

The Path to Hell is paved with good intentions

I think what is interesting is the drive that is the Autobots and Decpeticons. Mostly the cause of the Decpeticons and Megatron himself.

Alot of the time we see Megatron to be a crazy, battle hungry, warlord whos hel bent of causing destruction, conquering all in his path and who cares only about his goal to rule.

Over the years we have seen many version of Megatron. From silly goofy villain who's somtiems could acutally be a threat like in g1, to pash, cold, cunning like TFA, to being a crazy war lord who is incredibly cruel in TFP.

But these versions are mostly a Megatron who came from fighting, or had no good intentions to begin with besides being selfish or power hungry.

Then you have TFE and IDW/IDW2 (and possibly tf one). A different apprich to a character. Some may say its to make someone who has done cruel things as more sympathetic. But I think adds depth and personality.

Giving more than a crazy leader with silly goons, to a person who genuinely thought at the beginning, "I want things to change, for the better ,because it is broken"

Much howOptimus, the humble data clerk (hate he is a cop in idw tbh) and the hard working miner. Your everyday ppl, going through diffenrt struggles and honestly. I think woukd be fair to say that Orion wouldn't know the struggles of lower level bots that don't even have proper names..

Like D-16. The mech whis become Megatron.

Both Optimus and Megatron i think wnates to see a change , but how they both went about it i what added the conflict.

These two are basically your average everyday people. Megatron was an average everyday person. He wasn't born into the pits, net a warrior. A worker.

I think with alot of cartoon "villains" to we get older and started to see from a adult perspective. "Oh wait they are making sense." And how MESSED up the situation even was to drive these characters to this point.

Its no longer good vs evil, it is two ideals fighting aginst each other. What was once a fight for what these two sides believes in, turned into warfare and blood shed. To the mentality of Megatron being

"I can't trust anyone to right thing, besides me. I am the only one who can fix this, I can lead us."

You know what I could also see Optimus having the SAME mentality when comes to fighting megatron and restoring Cybertron. They are very much two sides of the same coin. I think that's what adds to the conflict between them. Optimus could be one bad day away from becoming Megatron onnthe sense of wanting to control the situation despite what costs just to not se Megatron when.

And you know he HAS done this. Yeeting the allspark for one to not let Megatron have ir but at the cost of Cybteron and its occupance. It was a loose loose situation regardless.

When it comes to alt-modist mentality, this high class vs low class, and the corruption of Cybertron. It is no wonder why so many people believes in the Decpeticon causes.

The reason why I clung so hard to Transformers Earthspark Megatron is because this was a break out from his character. To later learn it definitely took inspo from IDW who explored this character further sealed my admiration for him.

No one in the tf universe is less or more guilty. Both sides have done HORRIBLE things. Experimentation, brutality, killing innocence and their own soldiers just to get the won up. The autobots are not without their own blood shed. Only SOME of the autobots have a bit more regard for life and the planet they sit on. It doenst mean all of them do, and it doenst mean people within the groups around Optimus like it. But because they are painted as good guys we exapect them to.

Its when Decpeticons seem to take an interest in life do I find it way more compelling because it is out of their characteristics. They are the "bad guys"

Knockout being interested in Human cinema

Thundercracker being into writing and making movies

They are still PEOPLE. With interests and hobbies, internal conflicts and hesitations.

To see a Megatron not only fight aginst his own army , but take a human, a HUMAN as a friend that he TRUSTS?! That he gave up his Cybertronian already mode UP FOR?! Thats a bug FUCKING deal.

Just the contrast to TFW Megs to say TFP. Tfp depsite it beingbbetter for camouflage NEVER changes his alt mode. He is never willing to acutally change, he is so deeply rooted in what he is, who he is. What he is doing. That he is unwilling to change to the surroundings. No the surrounding will change BECAUSE of him.

While TFE realized a change was needed to fix things, to work together, to show I AM CHANGING, I WANT TO DO THE RIGHT THING.

This is not a Slander Optimus rant or a WOW Megatron is such a great guy essay.

Was mostly me rambling.

[definitely-not-karen]

Wish list of what I wanna see in the next transformers cartoon vaguely organized by how realistic it is to happen from hey they could do that to, no they wouldn’t do that.

Have a more character focused transformers show. Maybe a bit less action and a bit more character development?

A show with a continued narrative, I don’t really want an episodic series.

But if it is episodic, at least let it have a good status quo to build off of and return to each episode.

I wanna see Jazz, Prowl, Ratchet, Rodimus/Hot Rod, Sunstreaker, Sideswipe, Bluestreak, Hound.

I’d like it to be post war.

I’d like Megatron to either be morally ambiguous or good aligned again.

I like when the quintessons are the villains rather than it just being Decepticons vs Autobots

If it is Decepticons vs Autobots, I’d like some interesting things, like Autobots turning into Decepticons and vice versa.

If Decepticons are the evil ones, I’d like to see more of a, Autobots are the resistance rather than the Autobots are good but were corrupt so Decepticons rebelled but oh no they go too far so they’re evil no and Autobots good. Like I get it, it allows for interesting stuff when Decepticons as a movement has been corrupted but I just feel like I haven’t seen that really been utilized that well.

Here’s where my wish list gets unrealistic.

Finish off transformers animated.

Adapt transformers lost light somehow.

Have Rodimus Prime be the main character, maybe even start with Optimus already dead and follow his growth as a young leader, like riff off of G1 but instead of making Hot Rod go from rambunctious kid to burnt out adult immediately, have him keep his youthfulness.

A Swerve’s sit com.

Follow a Decepticon main character. Maybe on their journey of realizing the movement they’re in is corrupt?

Do something new with Transformers rescue bots somehow? Like a completely different continuity disconnected from it but like a spiritual successor.

Just a transformers show that doesn’t have them at war. Like they can fight or whatever but just, does it have to be world ending stakes all the time?

Adapt a Thundercracker redemption to movie director arc.

Bring back combiners so they release a toy line of combiners and I can finally get a First Aid toy.

A 2d animated transformers show. I’m a bit tired of boring backgrounds of the reused assets of the 3D shows.

A proper transformers queer romance. But also I’m not adverse to them all being aromantic.

I thought I’d have more on this wish list but even then this is a lot. Anyways. Make a wish.

[brandwhorestarscream]

elite trine x elite trine

I'm telling you right now that Starscream is the one getting sparked up, solely because he is such a size queen and demands double penetration every single time the trine faces. Double the spike means double the transfluid, and even though they're all stocked up on contraceptives, eventually having his gestation tank so full bites him in the aft.

Now, the elite trine are old lovers. They've been around a long time. You will never convince me that they didn't have at least one litter of sparklings sometime before Vos fell. Probably more. They all died in the fall. So Starscream knows what this feeling is--the swelling, the nausea, the sudden rampant hunger.

And he's in denial.

He's terrified. This can't be happening! Not now, not again, not here! Not while they're stranded on earth, not while he and Megatron are at their very worst, not when Vosians are on the very brink of extinction and there's less than a hundred of them left! No, no, no! This could not be worse, it really could not be any worse-

There's nine of them.

Starscream screeches in devastation and anger and a million other emotions when he bears his spark before a mirror and there's more than three, more than six, and sure enough seven, eight, nine teeny tiny sparks like little sprinkles of stardust orbiting around his. That's nothing crazy for a seeker, they always have sparklings in threes, but nine! It's just him and his mates--there's the rest of the airforce, of course, but they're not a proper aerie! He can't possibly terminate them, not when Vos's people are one bad battle away from total annihilation, but he can't keep them!

He dusts off some old protocols and tries desperately to put the sparklings into diapause, refusing to breathe a word of their existence to anyone. With their growth frozen he can double his efforts to finish this war and then they can go home and the little ones can be born safely. That's the plan, anyway.

Unfortunately, diapause takes a lot of energy. It has to keep all of the sparklings suspended in what is essentially a cryosleep funded by his own body, for all nine of them, and that's got very serious demands on his frame. Demands that he can't realistically cater to for long. He's very sneaky for awhile and does everything in his power to distract, misdirect, keep anyone from noticing the extra fuel going missing, but it's not long until Soundwave catches him. Recognizes the shift in his EM field and the way he walks, and promptly rats him out to Megatron.

Big boss is far from happy, but is honestly more exasperated than anything. Of course. If anyone was going to get themselves knocked up during wartime, it would be Starscream, wouldn't it? Then, he does something that's worse than anything he's ever done before:

Assigns his SIC to desk work

Starscream is seething! His position as air commander has been handed over to Thundercracker (who's none too pleased about the situation either), and he's been taken off active field duty for the foreseeable future. He's more prone to making mistakes and having lessened reaction time in his "condition", and Megatron wants these new seekerlings born healthy. Which will be kind of hard if their carrier gets himself blown up, so Starscream is stuck at the base devising battle formation strategy and barking at the air force not to get sloppy in his absence.

His two mates are no help either, he'll grumble to anyone that will listen. Skywarp's been following him around like a lovesick puppy and always wants to feel his belly and coo nonsense to his chassis, and no amount of wriggling away will get him to stop. He's so clingy its suffocating, always sneaking cheeky kisses and tummy pats. He thinks Starscream is just more and more adorable the more his belly grows 🤭 and Thundercracker remembers perfectly all the things Starscream likes when he's expecting, exactly what kind or sour snacks and how he likes the cushions for his wings, and also has the dietary supplement table memorized. If he's having 9 bitties they'll each roughly be X amount of weight when 30% grown so he needs to drink at minimum Y number of cubes a day to keep up with their growth demand and-

So on and so forth. Overall, they're excited, but deep down... they're all individually terrified of loss. When Vos was bombed, the seeker population lost 95-98% of it's members. They lost everyone, every parent, aunt, uncle, cousin, and distant relative: it's only by sheer luck that they survived. Their previous litter of bitties was lost then, though they don't know how they died. Every familial bond they had shattered that day and the bodies were never recovered. They don't know if they suffered. They don't know if they were scared. They don't know if it was instant or if it was dragged out and torturous. All they know is the deep, gaping loss left behind by the lost sparkling bonds still ring so painfully and clear-cut it's near debilitating sometimes. They're afraid that the autobots will take these ones away, too: that they'll die at the hands of bigoted grounders that think they don't deserve to live just for being children of the sky. They're so afraid that they won't be able to protect them, and that they'll lose them, too.

It shows in the way Starscream paces and mumbles feverishly to himself at 3 a.m. It shows in the way Skywarp becomes vicious and bloodthirsty on the battlefield, and it shows in the way Thundercracker carefully curls his shaking hands around his mate's belly in the middle of the night when he thinks they're asleep, muffled sobs overlayed with whispered prayers to please, please let this time be different.

When the bitties finally arrive they're in little eggs, 9 perfect little spheres with rubber outer shells and stuffed to the brim with gelatinous filling. Every egg pulses strongly with the force of the infant spark within, and they can see outlines of their children, all curled up in the fetal position and almost ready to hatch. They've already prepared a nest for their eggs, a perfectly warm and secure spot where one of them will always be there to watch them. Mostly Starscream, as the other two have more work to do, but he doesn't mind. He can read and draw up plans while sitting next to them, occasionally reaching to turn them if he thinks one looks cold, and making sure to talk to fill the silence. Sometimes to them, sometimes to himself to narrate what he's doing, just so the sparklings know they aren't alone.

When they start to hatch Skywarp and Thundercracker both get a frantic keysmash text from Starscream falling out of his chair, then another with ITS TIME!!!! followed by a blurry picture of their nest, and one of the eggs has a noticeable hairline fracture in it. Skywarp, bless his spark, is so excited and also very much not thinking straight, grabs Thundercracker's hand and forcibly sprints out of the command center dragging him along. It takes him a full 10 seconds to realize his mate is telling him to, "Just teleport us!"

"...oh yeah!"

They arrive just in time to witness the birth of their first son: a darling little seekerling that's all blue head to toe with a deep gray faceplate and Skywarp's eyes. These babies are tiny, as there are nine of them, they can easily be cradled in their hands. Skywarp moves to pick him up and promptly gets nipped at: Starscream laughs, and lowers his helm to chirp at the little one. Bitty responds in turn, knowing instinctively that this is his carrier, and reaches out both tiny servos to him.

His siblings come quickly after, all range of lovely color combinations: a red and purple one, white and blue, black and white, on and on it goes! They're all beautiful and healthy, and the proud parents give them all names befitting Vosians, as well as a solemn promise: to never, ever let anything hurt them. To love and protect them now, for always, and forever 💖

[in1-nutshell]

Hello could I have idw windblade x male human in it windblade is first finding out about humans and falls in love with them

Lets go Windblade!

Hope you enjoy!

Windblade falling for Human Buddy

SFW, Platonic, Hinted romance, Human reader

IDW

It was Thundercracker who introduced Windblade to Buddy.

Windblade had gone to Earth in Starscream’s place as something big had popped up and forced him to stay.

Whether there was something that actually came up, Windblade was excited to finally see Earth.

She had seen so many videos and read many data pads on the infamous planet and was ecstatic to finally have a chance to see it with her own optics.

Chromia was less excited than her friend, preferring terrain she knew, but someone had to protect her.

Thundercracker and Buster were the one’s who first welcomed them to the planet when Buddy and Marrissa came in.

Marrissa and Buddy look up at the two new bots. Marrissa: “Welcome to Earth Windblade and Chromia. I am Marrissa and this is Buddy. We will be your human liaison’s during you stay on planet.” Buddy was still looking at the bots. Marrissa nudged Buddy on the side, snapping him out of his trace. Buddy: “Pardon me, I am still new to Cybertronians on the job. As Marrissa said, I am Buddy. If you need anything or have any questions, please feel free to ask.” Windblade: “Buddy, I have a question.” Buddy: “Yes?” Windblade: "Is it true that there are turbo foxes on Earth? I read on the way here that there were.” Chromia and Thundercracker look at her curiously. Not the type of question they thought the City Speaker would ask. Buddy: “We don’t have ‘turbo foxes’ but we do have the smaller organic version of them. Also depending which type—” Windblade: “There’s more than one type?” Buddy: “Yeah, I mean, yes. On Earth we have different types of foxes. If you follow me, I think we rescued an injured one that was caught in a bear trap a couple days ago. If Berny hasn’t released him yet, we can still see the little guy.” Windblade fluttering her wings a bit: “Yes, please!” The jet follows the smaller human happily chatting about the fox. Chromia, Marrissa and Thundercracker: “…” Thundercracker: “You know, that sounds a little like one of the screen writes I have drafted.” Chromia glaring at the human from a distance: “And how does it end.” Thundercracker: “They both fall in love—” Chromia: “Nope.” She marches right behind the pair. Thundercracker: “I bet a tube of wax Windblade falls first.” Marrissa: “Thundercracker! That is highly inappropriate!... Anyways, Buddy already fell for her.”

Chromia was Windblade’s shadow everywhere she went with the human.

She didn’t believe that her friend could fall for someone she just met.

She was smarter than that!

Buddy sensed the hostility coming from Windblade’s companion and tried including her in as many activities as he could.

He had already brought done Windblade’s walls with showing the foxes and some of the more peaceful areas outside the base.

Chromia was a harder challenge, but Buddy was always up for a good challenge.

It came in the form of the indoor racetrack and Cybertronian sized sparring ring.

Buddy was the sole pilot of a prototype mech suit created to help other Cybertronians on Earth if trouble came around.

Apparently sparring was the way to get through to Chromia.

Buddy slamming down on his back in the suit. Windblade and Thundercracker wince at the sound. Chromia walks over his suit. Chromia: “Your form is sloppy and slow.” Buddy: “Yeah, well it’s kinda hard when you’re still getting used to the new framework.” Chromia smirks and offers him her servo. He takes it and lets her pull him up. Chromia: “Despite that, you did manage to get a few good hits.” Buddy: “Is that a compliment I hear?” Chromia: “Please, you’re a decent fighter for a human…maybe we should get a new sparring partner. Windblade get your sword.” Buddy: “What?” Windblade: “What?” Thundercracker and Marrissa: “What?” Buster: “Woof?”

Buddy didn’t stand a chance.

Not that Windblade was a better fighter than he was.

No…

It was that he didn’t want to hurt her, which ultimately lead to him getting his behind slammed on the ground for multiple rounds.

After the ‘fight’ Buddy offered to show them around more places around the base and to see the sunset.

This seemed to be the pattern for the rest of the visit.

Work, sight see, spar, sight see, back to base.

The sight seeing only increased once Marrissa helped Buddy get clearance for certain airspaces.

Windblade had a soft spot for leisure flies around dawn and walks near the bases forested area.

The two were rarely seen apart during the whole visit.

Sadly, the visit had ended too soon for the pair.

Buddy, Marrissa, and Thundercracker waving at the ship as it disappeared out of sight.  Thundercracker: “That was a nice visit. Better without Screamer here.” Buddy: “I will never get how out of the ‘trine’ thing, YOU came out with a semi stable moral compass.” Marrissa: “I second that.” Buddy starts moving to the door. Thundercracker: “You’re not upset that Windblade left, are you?” Buddy blushes a bit before shaking his head. Buddy: “We knew the visit was short Cracker.” Marrissa: “So you aren’t going to miss her?” Buddy: “I didn’t say that. She is a good friend—” Thundercracker fake coughs loudly while Marrissa gave him a knowing smile. Buddy just huffs and walks back to his office desk. PING! Buddy looks down at his tablet to see a message. Windblade: “Can’t wait till I visit again! Miss you already!” Buddy blushes and smiles. Buddy: “Can’t wait either.”

How Buddy was looking at Windblade when she steps out of the ship.

[kandicon]

Is nobody talking abt Nova Storm being a potential trans woman?? Like she not only takes Thundercracker's place but also has his sonic booms?? The show has gone over nonbinary people and gender conversations already, this is not out of the relm of possibility at all.

If nobody's gonna talk about it that just means I'm gonna talk EXTRA about it. Headcanon time.

Okay, so obviously Starscream was the one who did the surgery. He'd be all to happy to have unique colors w the removal of Thundercracker's blue and be the only boy in the group. The chance to stand out even more amongst his trine AND a free opportunity to stick his hands in some internals and do as he pleases?? HELL yes.

He was only a little upset that Nova Storm wanted to keep her sonic booms and he couldn't take that mechanism to stick into his own internals. Just a little.

Skywarp started doing makeup because Nova Storm took interest in it. Which of course meant Starscream also got into it too because he would not let his trine walk around with messy lipstick! Don't they know they're an extension of himself?! Their image is his image and they will look the best. Both Skywarp and Nova Storm have shaky hands from their outlier abilities. Good thing no-smudge paint can last without wear for months, no war or prison could ever get in the way of a perfect face of makeup.

Nova Storm realized she was a femme during the war, which is the main reason she got Starscream to do her transition and not a less biased, less unethical actual doctor. It had downfalls, but it was also one of the trine's closest times during the war. The three of them, all sitting around a room meticulously planning "Thundercracker's" death for months, because Nova Storm's a writer and no way she's gonna give up the chance to act out one her stories in real life. Skywarp is so proud of the fake tears she made at the news to this day (Starscream learned mascara just so Skywarp could wear some that day to get it all runny). Y'all will think that the Decepticons' most guarded secret has something to do with the war, or a Shockwave experiment, but no. The Decepticons' closest kept secret is Nova Storm's transition.

Everyone can kinda agree that it was probably the best for Nova's transition to be secret, "Thundercracker" was a very public figure as one of Starscream's trine. It would have been an easily available weakness for other Decepticons or Autobots to attack to hurt Starscream or Nova Storm. But the main reason was for the tragic death story potential and siblings scheming together.

Skywarp and Nova Storm definitely had their whole finishing each other's sentences before her transition, but they totally played it up even more afterwards.

Nova Storm got so happy and euphoric when people started to refer to her and Skywarp as sisters (usually with a negative "s" word before it. Ex. Scary, sinister, spooky, etc.). She still feels euphoric over it, but it's much more normal for her now and then she realizes she feels less about it because is so much more normal and common now and that makes her even happier. It's just a thing for her now!! It's a correct thing and it's natural and that's exactly how it's supposed to be.

[transformersroleplay]

hey all! i’m currently looking for a lucky someone (or someones) to join a 1x1 literate transformers roleplay on discord!

PLEASE BE 18+. I am over 18 and I intend to have graphic content within our writing. A heads-up warning for mentions/potential depictions of (GENERAL TW)

::read more::

sexual themes/kinks, drug abuse, SA, (mainly mentions of) child abuse, medical themes, mechpreg, etc. This list isn’t limited to these things, nor does our writing have to include all of them! We can discuss in more detail what we feel most comfortable with. :)

Good grammar, punctuation, 3rd person perspective, and somewhat consistent tense are very important to me, though if you slip up every so often, don’t worry, I won’t bite! I love to write A LOT (at least at the beginning), usually breaking discords message limit. However, quality over quantity is even more important, so don’t feel like you need to grind out 6 paragraphs if you don’t have the inspiration/material to work off of! I tend to shorten down to usually 2 paragraphs as the roleplay goes on, maybe even less depending on the scene, but sometimes i’ll go off on a tangent again. As said before, feel free to discuss with me! Communication is key.

Please no ocs! I ONLY do canon/canon, at least at first. Once I get to know you and get comfortable with your style, I usually become more open towards ocs, especially if we can make some together!

As for continuity, I mainly go for an ambiguous universe or an amalgamation of multiple. If we want a specific one to work with, I’m most familiar with IDW (disclaimer that I’m not the most knowledgeable out there), G1 universe and the aligned continuity. IDW would be my first pick though!

I have many many, MANY ships in my arsenal, but there are a few main ones that I’m usually always down to do, those include: (in no particular order)

lockdown/swindle

ratchet/drift

starscream/skywarp/thundercracker

starscream/megatron

starscream/skyfire

starscream/optimus

megatron/the elite trine

rung/megatron

deadlock/hot rod

deadlock/ratchet

rodimus/megatron

chromedome/rewind

soundwave/megatron

soundwave/shockwave

I can mainly write from Ratchet, Megatron, Deadlock/Drift, Starscream, Skyfire, Thundercracker, and Skywarp, but I can try my hand at anyone! I just can’t guarantee I’ll be the best at them, but i’ll try!

As for plot, I don’t really have anything specific in mind at the moment except for starscream based ideas. However, no matter the ship, I’m always down for slice of life, canon/canon divergence, and royalty aus. Im a HUGE sucker for royalty aus.

so yeah! hmu if you’re interested and we can talk more!

[storm-and-starlight]

Storm's Fic Recs: Transformers Edition

I was in Transformers fandom from June 2022 to February 2024. Here are the fics that I'll still carry with me, even though I've moved on. (I tried to tag as many people as possible, but I couldn't find everyone -- my apologies to cerkowah, jabberish, & buttface)

Victory Condition and Champion by Astolat (@astolat on Tumblr) Victory Condition more or less rewired my brain, and I don't just mean that it yeeted me into Transformers fandom almost entirely against my will or intention. It... sort of reset the way I saw the world? it's hard to explain. Either way, the poetry is very good. Champion is something of a spiritual predecessor to Victory Condition, but a lot more. just. fun. Ending the war with the power of dance parties. It's great. Victory Condition: Loosely G1, Megop, rated E Champion: Loosely G1, largely gen, rated T

Lonely Signals by Anefi (@anefi on Tumblr) SPACE WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALES god I love a good space whales story, and not only does this have space whales in abundance it also manages to nail down the impact of a four-million year war perfectly, without feeling too small or like it's going too big to be felt. IDW2005, Cosmos/Soundwave, rated T

Rest Easy by Largishcat (@largishcat on Tumblr) I barely ever read Dratchet, but this one... it's not "so good I read it despite the ship", it's so good I read it for the ship. Like Lonely Signals, it's one of very few fics I've found that actually manage to sell the scope of the war, and the Ratchet characterization is on-fucking-point. IDW2005, Dratchet, Megatron/Ratchet, rated E

the triumph of time (series) by oriflamme (@sunderedstar on Tumblr) I read all 400,000 words or so of this series in about four days. It's a rewrite of the end of IDW but make it epic (as in Tolkienesque) (seriously, idk how else to describe it except that I get the same sense of world-weight and cataclysmic events as I do from a lot of LOTR and high fantasy) but add in poetry and melancholy and history and also repairing everything that went wrong in IDW that never really got addressed. IDW2005, mostly rated T, some G. Check the tags for pairings.

Hazard Light by EatYourSparkOut, Emporianne, & cerkowah (@eatyoursparkout & @emporianne on Tumblr) This one's mostly on here for two things: 1.) doing hanahaki in a way that is like. actually thoughtful and not weird about love or unrequited love or anything like that, and 2.) doing hanahaki with robots. It's an absolutely brilliant setup that's brilliantly executed, and also Brainstorm and Percy are cute and pining and very dumb about it. MTMTE, Brainstorm/Perceptor, rated M

I'm All Full Up on Yesterdays, Don't Sing Me No More Blues by DesdemonaKaylose (@desdemonakaylose on Tumblr) Look, I know I say this a lot, but this fic has got the vibes down. It's exactly the take on Jazz that I've been looking for, all music and motion and city lights. Loosely Transformers: Prime, Jazz/Prowl, rated M

Send us a Blindfold, Send us a Blade by Trinary (@trinarysuns on tumblr) This was the first non-Astolat fic I read in this fandom that actually had an impact on me, and what an impact it was. One of the things that I love most about Transformers fic (especially IDW fic) is the sense of the... the timescale of the war? The weight of looking back and seeing how much has changed, and this fic really nails that specific sort of nostalgia. (Same kinda thing with how Lonely Signals/Rest Easy handle the war, but this one handles the revolution.) IDW2005, Starscream/Thundercracker, Starscream/Thundercracker/Skywarp, rated M

Attaque Composée (series) by neveralarch (@neveralarch on Tumblr) It's a fencing AU, but also they're all still robots, but also it's one of the most heartwrenching takes on IDW Starscream that I've seen (and that's saying something). The twisting of canon to fit the AU is masterfully done. IDW2005, Starscream/Wheeljack, mostly rated G, one T, one M.

Mistakes on Mistakes Until- by jabberish This one's an excellent sci-fi epic with everything that Jazz lends himself really well to in fic? Intrique and plot twists and General Shenaniganery. It's really fun. Transformers - All Media Types, Jazz/Prowl, rated M, currently incomplete but updating

Fathomless by Sroloc_Elbisivni (@sroloc--elbisivni on Tumblr) This is exactly the kind of vaguely-fairytale-magical-realism sort of tragedy-with-a-happy-ending that I live for, and it's especially notable in that that is not, precisely, the vibe that Transformers lends itself to and yet this fic pulls it off so well. Loosely G1, Jazz/Prowl, rated T

Your Own Hands by SatelliteSoundwave (@satellitesoundwave on Tumblr) An absolutely incredible example of non-linear storytelling. Not only is the actual order of scenes non-linear, it's tightly tied to the story itself. Wreckers Trilogy, Taraprowl, rated M

the only thing left out in the light by buttface Literally the only fic I've found that deals with the whole "Rodimus died on the alternate Lost Light and Drift held his funeral" thing, and it does it so beautifully. MTMTE, Driftrod, rated T

[floofyfungi]

It may have been hinted at in part one but if you can reveal it, will Starscream's immortal spark be canon or play a part in this story?

Starscream's immortal spark is canon in the Miracle series! It will play a major part in the endgame, but I'm not going to talk about that cause spoilers >:)

Starscream is functionally immortal in this AU. Even if you were to grind his spark into a fine powder it would eventually reforge itself into a working spark, though that would take centuries.

Starscream's immortality is the only reason why he is still Megatron's second in command. After his first couple assassination attempts, Megatron decided Starscream had to go. Megatron 'killed' him, only for Starscream to wake up a couple days later, complaining. Megatron tried all sorts of methods to permanently extingush him, he even got Shockwave to study Starscream's spark to try and figure out what sort of outlier bullshit this was. But even Shockwave could only come up with hypotheses.

Eventually Megatron came to the conclusion Starscream was worth more alive than dead and now just puts up with the occasional assassination attempt every century or so. If he's stuck with Starscream he might as well put him to use. He's kept as second in command because, aside from being very good at his job, there Megatron and Soundwave can keep an eye on him. Starscream is also viciously good at eliminating any other would-be challengers to the throne. So Megatron only really has to worry about Starscream instead of a dozen unknown usurpers.

Very few people know Starscream is immortal. As seen by Slipstream’s complete surprise when Starscream reappeared after she crushed his spark in her claws. Amongst the Decepticons, only Megatron, Soundwave, Shockwave, and his trine know for certain. Though a few other high ranking officers have their suspicions. Starscream himself didn't realise until Thundercracker and Skywarp told him they had found his grey frame on the battlefield without a spark, only to watch the shards slowly inch from beneath the rubble back into his open spark chamber. Skywarp had nightmares for weeks.

None of the Autobots know for certain. But they do know Starscream should definitely be dead at this point. Yet he is not. If it was anything less ridiculous than immortality Prowl and Jazz would have figured it out by now.

Hotrod believes Starscream is immortal, which his fellow Autobots berate him for. 'Don't be ridiculous' they say.

[decepti-thots]

1, 8 and 12

"the character everyone gets wrong"

moving over to exRiD for this one. arcee is imo subject to this a lot, despite fannish sentiment around her being overall very positive. i suspect a part of this is that the segments of idw1 fandom i hang out in either haven't read much or all of exRiD and/or do not read it as often as other series like MTMTE, so she tends to be subject to a lot of 'flattening' into her most iconic, meme-y characteristics. fun murder lady who likes murder! yay! but the thing is that the popular perception of arcee in a lot of circles is perpetually stuck in what she started as, not where she was ultimately taken. arcee's arc in the latter parts of idw1 are about the ways she grows out of and beyond the original concept of her as Scary Violent Lady TM, and about finding personhood for herself beyond that. by the time you're a dozen or so issues into phase two, that entire concept of her is being questioned and developed by the comic! it would perhaps bother me less if that entire original presentation of her wasn't so heavily rooted in phase one's (trans)misogynistic portrayal that we're ostensibly all on the same page about being bad, and the later stuff that is largely ignored wasn't a direct attempt to work with and rectify. (this has gotten better in the past 3-4 years, though.) i don't think anyone is deliberately leaning into that, it's just a side effect of most folks in the places i hang out not being overfamiliar with the actual canon stuff. but. well. it does make me a little sad. she's got such a compelling arc! i would like to have more enthusiasm for it, as opposed to making fun jokes about her stabbing people. (on the plus side, discussing this before has persuaded at least three people i know of to read exRiD and they told me they loved her in it, so!)

"common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about"

anyone who thinks exRiD is light on character work, as per the above, is wrong. sorry. it has great character work! the division of 'MTMTE is for character stuff, exRiD is Plot TM only for dudebro nerds' is incorrect, and unfortunately remains a common sentiment. barber did not do it the same way that roberts did, but exRiD is intensely interested in its characters and barber has spoken at length about how interested he was in digging into character dynamics. if anything is barber's signature, it's his extensive use of internal character monologue, even! yes, he also really likes doing convoluted plots- and it's fair that is simply a turn off for people- but the perception he doesn't care about characters or interpersonal relationships is very unfair. this man did not do All That with thundercracker for people to write that off.

"the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them"

i did this question previously for aileron but also! also!! more people need to give some love to idw needlenose. as with aileron, it's not that people DISLIKE him, it's that he is great and i want more people to understand this. he's got a complicated cross-faction sibling relationship with tracks! he's a gay widower and it's really sad!! he's a hardcore True Believer in the decepticon cause and imo a wayyy better exploration of what a generic non-high-command decepticon is struggling with in the aftermath of the war ending as a real believer in the cause than stuff like the scavengers that gets more play in fandom. but he gets way less attention as idw exploring that, unfortunately. i love him so much, please join me in the needlenose stan corner.

[my-naughty-writings-and-musings]

A while back @fuccerito did an absolutely AMAZING comic and I was so inspired I wrote it out as a chaptered fic! They were also kind enough to let me post it!

For the summary: Many less than harmonious pairs of bots, both Autobot and Decepticons, awaken to find themselves unexpected contestants on "Bang for Your Buck", a Quintesson game show where love and making it is the only way to win! Stuck in boxes with no weapons or hope of escape, the stakes become even higher when their hosts offer the Omega Key to the winning pair. Can any of them out aside their differences long enough to endure the increasingly erotic challenges? Read this or the original comic by fuccerito on their Twitter to find out!

Chapter One: Introduction

"Ugh... What...?" Thundercracker moaned as he came to, the entire world spinning around him whilst he tried to lift his helm. Blinking the blur from his optics, he sat up in a daze and found himself in a room unlike any Cybertronian dwelling he'd ever seen, his helm pounding as if he'd downed enough engex to give a Titan a hangover. 

"Where the hell am I?" he asked out loud, trying to feel a bit less dizzy as he looked around for an explanation. Finding quite literally nothing, not even a window along the spotless white walls, he was left thoroughly confused. A room without doors? What the fuck? he vented to himself, having no clear route for attempting an escape. Blinking to clear some of the sleep from his optics, he briefly considered trying to smash his way out before a second voice startled him fully awake.

"Ugh..." 

"Bumblebee?!" he shouted as he beheld the scout rising from the floor. Looking just as haggard as he felt, Bee winced at his booming volume, covering his audials and making an expression of deep annoyance.

"That is so loud..." he whined, not even looking as Thundercracker swung his weapon mounted around for an attack. To his surprise, horror, and mild embarrassment, the Seeker found his arm utterly rid of a gun, not that Bumblebee even bothered to see him as a threat. Squinting around at the lack of windows and doors and appearing just as frustrated as the other mech had felt, the Scout looked ready to make a sarcastic quip before an electric buzz startled them both.

In the blink of an optic, a holographic screen appeared before them, glowing bright with oversaturated colors and a flamboyantly dressed Quintesson beaming into a microphone. 

"Welcome, friends from Cybertron! I bet you're wondering where you are right now!" the alien cracked with a snap of his tentacles, triggering one of the more obviously fake laugh tracks across the galaxy. Both bots exchanged a mutual expression of disbelief and wondered if it was possible to share the same fever dream, only for the background music to swell and confirm everything they were seeing was happening.

"Well, buckle in. You're the lucky bots selected for our prestigious game show - I'm your host; Emceeus!" the charismatic alien announced with a wink and a flourish of the microphone. At the lack of cheers from his captives, the nonplussed host continued, smiling with a level of charm few would have thought possible with so many rows of teeth. Bumblebee briefly started wondering if he might be able to smash his way out as Thundercracker doubled down on the same thought.

"You may notice I am a Quintesson - fear not!" Emceeus assured them, speaking more softly as he closed his eyes in time to a series of tender, mood setting images flowing across the screen. Flowers, hearts, and space puppies played in perfect time to sappy music. "We here are not like our violent brethren - we are a peaceful rogue colony..."

To the gathered bots horror, the screen shifted to a lovely but extremely explicit clip of two bots making passionate love, their campy moans compelling the captive's optics to find the most interesting possible things on the floor.

"And we love love!" the Quintesson announced sweetly over the audio of the mechs going at it, tentacles waving showily before a few space pot leaves made a cameo on the screen. A small addendum acknowledged them as the pre-recorded audience awwed over his words to preserve the mood. " ...And space weed. "

"As for the issue of why you're here, it seemed you were having a battle of sorts in our sector of space - so nasty, it destroyed the comet where we were hosting auditions!" the Quintesson continued over footage of said conflict, which allowed the bots to finally recall what they'd been doing before their unexpected casting. The recorded audience gasped in fake awe as the respective sides maintained fire on one another, filling the void of space with brilliant flashes of cannon fire that beautifully illuminated the aforementioned asteroid... before careless fire from both sides smashed it to pieces. Bumblebee and Thundercracker exchanged a look of guilt and concern before the host clapped his tentacles together with delight.

"What a show of passion! We just had to cast you!" he declared to a repeat of the applause effect from before, absolutely beaming into the camera to the brief relief of the captives. Smashing someone's comet usually got you way worse punishment than a forced game show recruitment.

Elsewhere, perhaps not too far away in a completely identical cell, Starscream and Soundwave glared at a hologram of the same broadcast. 

"...what show?!" Starscream continued to complain, something he'd been doing since the moment he'd woken up. Hands on his hips, the Seeker had already demanded to speak to the alien's manager to no avail, compelling Soundwave to stand in pained silence as their host finally appeared to acknowledge them. 

"You're on; "Bang for Your Buck!" - a show where contestants can show us their love to win a fantastic prize! Our audience will give you a prompt, and you will be given two cycles to complete it! Tap out, and you'll be out of the running!" he explained cheerily, bringing up a diagram to better explain. Three sequential images displayed a pair of contestants getting a prompt to kiss, carrying out the act, then celebrating their victory. The true ramifications of what was being proposed started to dawn on the captive participants, and a wide variety of mostly negative looks were exchanged amongst an intense flurry of even more negative emotions. "You'll see your first prompts appear in s-"

"Excuse me." Bumblebee interrupted as he held up a servo, voice broadcasting out to all the other contestants for the sake of the plot. With strength disproportionate to his size, he addressed their captors with a thoroughly disapproving glare. "What's the prize?"

"That little thing you were all fighting over - the Omega Key!" Emceeus answered just as eagerly, gesturing to a stock photo of the aforementioned artifact. Seemingly oblivious to how displeased his contestants were to be there, the host was equally nonplussed when they all stood up in a panic at his mention of the key, collective attentions now fully engaged.

"What about-" a single bot spoke up before being interrupted by a final sweetening of the deal.

"And five million Shanix!"

"Dope." came the mostly satisfied reply. 

"You'll see your first prompts on your screen!" the host announced as the fake audience cheered, disappearing from view to leave a loading screen. Every bot was left to await their fate for what felt like a purposefully cruel length of time, the annoying suspenseful music making every second drag on like five. In their tiny but not necessarily claustrophobic room, Bumblebee and Thundercracker got their first prompt at the same time as the others, the flowy text scrolling almost mockingly onto the screen.

Hold Hands!

Somehow, the chaste prompt was more embarrassing than the most erotic of acts could have ever been. Both bots flushed bright pink, turning to each other with an expression of hopeless despair mixed with embarrassment. It was abundantly clear there would be no escape; without weapons or anything resembling a weak point in the structure around them, they had few reasons not to comply. With those reasons consisting of nothing but schoolgirl levels of bashful self consciousness, they both more or less came to the same conclusion after powering through their reservations. Neither would forsake their duty for fear of cooties.

This is so ridiculous, but I guess I need to get that key... Bumblebee thought to himself, raising a hand as he faced the other mech. Thundercracker didn't look any more pleased with the situation, but he at least appeared willing to cooperate, albeit with the same level of hesitation. The Seeker gulped and flexed his digits.

Shit. I guess this is happening. This is straight out of one of my favorite fanfics... he thought in a rush, able to clearly recall multiple bookmarked fics with the exact same premise. When he'd read those, however, he had been imagining anything but Bumblebee. Not that he found the scout ugly or anything, he just typically didn't fantasize about bots with Autobot insignias... Considering what was at stake, he swiftly set about convincing himself to face the challenge, as overwhelming as it may have been.

"Well, if..." Bumblebee started, turning to face the floor as he shuffled forward and started to offer his hand. Following the lead, Thundercracker began blindly groping for the other mech, nodding along as they both continued to avert their optics while convincing themselves. 

"If it's for the Omega Key...?" he added with open uncertainty, stepping backwards and blushing that much harder as they got closer. If this succeeded there would still be a battle for the prize, but at least it would be back in Cybertronian control. For the good of their species, he needed to persevere. 

"...We all need to get it." Bumblebee continued as he squeezed his optics shut and turned away entirely, blushing so fiercely he was sure his face would be combusting at any moment. He was halfway certain he'd hit his head during the battle and would wake up at any moment, the absurdity of it all feeling more like a concussion dream than anything with any basis in reality. The warmth steadily approaching his outstretched digits challenged that theory.

"Yeah." Thundercracker covered his closed optics as their hands finally touched, arms held nearly straight to keep as much distance between the two of them as physically possible. Barely able to nod, he summoned all the courage remaining in his spark and did what needed to be done. Their hands came together with a burst of pure embarrassment that was mirrored by their fellow contestants, though most of the aforementioned bots were feeling far more murderous than bashful. 

Mere feet away, a mercifully soundproofed room was still trembling from the raw outrage within, its display screen buzzing a most infuriating prompt to the furious occupants. 

Kiss with Tongue

There were few bots who would have taken the idea well in regards to their greatest nemesis, but Megatron was uniquely incensed, his rage so overpowering it could have warped time and space had the Quintessons not used their technology to bolster it just in case.

" WHAT IS THIS BULLSHIT?! " the Decepticon leader roared, optics and veins bulging as the mech at his side expressed his equal rage with significantly more decorum.  

"This is heinous to ask of enemies!" Optimus agreed, stressing the final word to remind their captors and himself that he had NO interest in Megatron. Their feelings to one another consisted of nothing but hatred mixed with an acceptable amount of respect for the other's physical prowess... nothing else, not in the slightest. Megatron made to shatter the screen just before the cameras shifted most conveniently to the next room over, his explosive rage making it clear he had much more yelling to do before they could hope to enter the competition for real. 

" GIVE ME THE OMEGA KEY, I DEMAND- "

In the next room over, a mech who would have given any number of things to be napping at that moment was glaring at his own screen, the bags beneath his optics almost as deep as his dissatisfaction with his assigned partner. Said partner was looking mischievous and delighted, his lips curling up for a fang accented grin as he secured a hold on Ratchet's shoulder. The older mech could almost feel Drift's optics staring a hole in the most sensitive region of his neck. Worse, the buzzing screen seemed to mock him with the simplicity of its request. 

Bite

Oh, Primus... he thought with an internal sigh, utterly done even before they'd had a chance to begin. How had he ended up with the only mech that managed to be as hot as he was infuriating?

Back in the room where Starscream and Soundwave miraculously hadn't murdered one another, the two were tapping into their competitive nature to tackle their embarrassing but mostly manageable prompt. 

Wing Massage

"Ow! You're doing it wrong!" Starscream hissed as Soundwave roughly handled the Seeker's wings in what could only be called the loosest approximation of a massage. It looked as ridiculous as it felt, but both mechs soldiered on, the former grumbling as the latter doubled down.

"Soundwave: simply giving Starscream what he deserves." he said tensely, motivating himself with thoughts of all the revenge he'd enjoy once they were free. Putting on a good show was a humiliating but simple enough challenge, and he was fully confident there'd be no character development of any kind along the way, not from himself or any of the cast. They'd all just have to double down for a thoroughly unsexy time...

[silenceofthewave]

[There were many things that Soundwave was. Symbiont host bot. Surveillance extraordinaire. Third in Command of the Decepticon Forces. Head Communications Officer. However, the most important aspect of it was often the most forgotten about, or simply thought of in passing- Soundwave had almost complete control over the Nemesis' systems.]

THE EXODUS

[This control was for several reasons; it had the processing power built into its frame to ensure that the automated systems did not meet unexpected failure, it needed to be able to adjust trajectory, course and speed at the blink of an optic, groundbridging, ensuring weapons and communications arrays always performed at top capabilities.]

[The control the mech had over the ship was not absolute- to save processing power, and to prevent becoming utterly useless in its other duties, Soundwave had created a patch that allowed the ship AI to take over the less relevant tasks. They would check in often, go over reports, fix what was broken. Though, it was easy enough to regain that control, and that's exactly what Soundwave was doing.]

[The mech silently stood at its usual terminal, paying no attention to the vehicons that came in and out of the bridge. It could vaguely hear the outraged cries of Lord Megatron- something about Starscream not responding to his comms. Soundwave couldn't help the small smirk behind its visor. Soon, that was going to be the least of Megatron's worries.]

[No, soon enough, Megatron would have a complete catastrophe on his servos.]

[Indeed, Soundwave had spent the last two weeks painstakingly coding a seek-and-destroy virus. While it would have been much easier to simply set the Nemesis to self destruct and leave, there was no guarantee that it would actually self destruct. That process required two codes, both of which it knew, then sent out a ping to the high command. It only took one code- the code Megatron knew- to halt the process in its tracks.]

[A virus though? A virus could be built to be discreet, undetectable, and just as devistating. The virus itself was complex- it had to be, for its task was no simple one. It had to utilize the AI's blindspots and complex firewall navigation to remain undetected. It had to be able to pull power directly from the engine's electical outputs to various systems simultaneously. It had to have every access and failsafe code built into it.]

[The virus would take the electrical output and put each targeted system into overdrive. Not only would this completely fry any and all circuitry, systems like the space bridge, communications array and cloaking would be rendered completely unusable. The electrical generators that powered them would more than likely explode and require either a full replacement, rebuild or extensive repairs. The Nemesis and her crew would be rendered sitting targets with no escape.]

[Truly, it was a feat of software engineering.]

[Soundwave had run tests earlier last week on its outputs and capabilities, which explained the strange system failures and power fluctuations the vehicons had been complaining about. The code had to be perfect- Soundwave would not be there to witness its execution, nor would it be patched into the systems. If it were, it ran the risk of being disabled itself, either by Lord Megatron or the virus. That was a risk it was not willing to take.]

[Soundwave had finished uploading the virus and was in the process of setting a four hour timer when Lord Megatron stormed in. It quickly finished and shut off the terminal before facing the enraged mech that stood in the middle of the bridge. Megatron was pointing a clawed servo at it.]

"Where are the seekers, Soundwave." It wasn't a question, rather a demand.

[Soundwave considered its options carefully. Though, the longer it waited, the angrier Megatron seemed to get. It quickly scrambled together a series of images from the last few days. Starscream in their quarters tending to Aurora, Thundercracker and Skywarp getting ready for patrol, Slipstream and her trine arguing in their own quarters.]

"If that is where they are, then why can't I find them? In fact," Megatron stepped closer to Soundwave.

[His field was alight with anger and suspicion. Megatron was close enough to touch, to get a true read. His field betrayed the way he knew something was going on, but Soundwave had no way of connecting the dots without that physical contact. Yet, it did not reach out, and neither did Megatron.]

"You know why, don't you?"

[Megatron raised a clawed servo, his index digit a mere milimeter away from Soundwave's visor. Still, they did not touch. Megatron was undoubtedly toying with it at this point.]

"I knew that little fling you had, and that slagged sparkling was going to cause more trouble than its worth." Megatron's voice was low, and if Soundwave didn't know any better, it would have classified the tone as sultry.

"I told Starscream to stay away from you, that I couldn't have my invaluable third in command distracted from its duties."

[Soundwave stayed maddeningly silent. It had no idea where Megatron's mind was- what he thought was going on, what he was going to do. There was an electrical charge that ran up its spinal strut and its HUD flashed the option to activate its battle protocols. It quickly denied that, standing stone still.]

"But, you wouldn't betray me, would you Soundwave?"

[Megatron's voice teetered between fake and genuine concern. Soundwave shut down the urge to shudder and shook its helm.]

"No, I didn't think so."

[Megatron's servo finally made contact with Soundwave's visor as he pet the mech with the back of his knuckles. Images instantly floated to Soundwave's mind, visions of unspeakable violence aimed towards itself, its mate, the seekers and...Aurora.]

[Megatron was threatening it.]

"Bring me the seekers, Soundwave." Megatron did not need to tack on the or else.

[Still, his threats rang hollow to Soundwave. There would have been a time where Soundwave would have ended the interaction cowering in fear, not unlike Starscream, but that time was also when its loyalty was unquestionable. Now, there was no loyalty left- not to Megatron at least.]

[Soundwave had evolved past whatever was keeping it here. Whether it be that it had no other tangible experiences than fighting to survive or that simply the Decepticons were all it had left- neither of those things were true now. It had something to live and fight for other than itself and someone it used to call Lord.]

[Megatron had left the bridge by now. The remaining vehicons stood as silent as ever, their fields anxious and jittery. It paid no mind to them as it faced the terminal and turned it on.]

[Soundwave opened an encrypted message link and searched the frequencies until it found the one it was looking for. Autobot signals and messaging might be encrypted, but there was always at least one open comm link available. It was untraceable, and had to go through several layers of scrambling, but it was a well known secret. Anyone who dared use it, at least within the Decepticon ranks, was immediately considered a traitor.]

[At this point, that is exactly what Soundwave was.]

[Soundwave unspooled a datacable and connected it to the terminal. It uploaded a large data packet containing vital Decepticon intelligence, and an inert copy of the virus, only to prove its good faith. It sent the datapacket with the following message.]

Use this wisely.

[Soundwave turned off the terminal. It had a limited amount of time to enact the next portion of the plan. Luckily, it had been smart enough to transport its Rumble and Frenzy to an unused, secure site a few days ago. It had stolen medical supplies to keep them stable- not like Knockout would notice anyway. Still, its spark ached. They were stable, but still had not even shifted. Soundwave didn't know if they ever would again.]

[It lightly shook its helm, perishing the thought. It needed to disconnect itself from the ship entirely, not focus on its woes. Soundwave quickly found its way to the engineering terminal and plugged itself in.]

[One by one, it disconnected from the systems. The sensations of the freed up processing power quickly began to leave it dizzy and unwell. Its frame had been constructed with the intended load of the Nemesis. To no longer have that weight on its neural net was both freeing and debilitating. Its thoughts raced by too fast- there was nothing to hinder them anymore.]

[The last one it disconnected from was surveillance. Its HUD suddenly became quiet. Too quiet. There was no constant video chatter, no moving images in the corner of its optics. For once, it could see the reflection of its optics against the tinted glass. That was perhaps the most unsettling part.]

[Soundwave had to take a moment. It felt like it was swimming under solvent, while also being pulled into a tidepool. Perhaps it had detached itself too fast, but time was not something it had. Still, everything felt terribly empty and lonely, its HUD blank, its mind startlingly clear.]

[Now, all there was left to do was...Leave.]

[There would be no goodbyes. Knockout was gone, and it doubted Shockwave would want one. Soundwave certainly was not going to say goodbye to Megatron.]

[It was not the time for sentimentality. Soundwave had already packed its things and left it with Rumble and Frenzy. The only issue was that Soundwave no longer had a space bridge. It would have to fly.]

[Quietly, the mech made its way to the very same flight deck that its relationship with Starscream started on. Luckily, there was no one out there. The sun blazed low on the horizon, painting the sky with firey reds and oranges. Tinges of purple could be seen the higher it looked. Briefly, Soundwave wondered if the Stolen Secret would ever witness sunsets as beautiful as this.]

[Without a final look back, Soundwave transformed and raced into the sky.]