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airawisteria · 2 years ago

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See, Kairi might not be my favourite character from KH (though, she's really fun to draw), but, like, the way she is so insecure about her friendship with Sora (I would say Riku as well, but let's be real here, those two could barely be considered friends, maybe acquaintances by this point, honestly) is something that would be so interesting to explore. I'm assuming it's probably from the trauma of losing her home world and everyone she cared about, like her Grandma, when her world was consumed by darkness—but, wow.

Even in KH1 where she and Sora are, in my opinion, the closest they've ever been shown to be, she's going on about leaving alone with Sora, the way that she immediately gives Sora a good luck charm the second she knows he's about to leave again, the way that she reaches out to Sora so desperately as if to say, "Please don't leave".

Then, in KH2, she straight up just forgets (not that it was her fault) about him and goes on with her life perfectly content. Once she realises, however, she immediately tries to remember him with such desperation that you have to wonder—why does she care so much for Sora but was perfectly fine staying on Destiny Islands instead of looking for her world or desperately trying to hold onto her memories of her Grandma? I think, at this point, some people would brush this off as 'her romantic feelings for Sora', but, like, is it really just that? I think it's more so about how she doesn't want to lose Sora completely as she did with her home world. She almost lost Sora completely, memories and all, and I think that after you've experienced losing your loved ones and the world that you've grown to love/have always loved almost completely at the ripe old age of a nursery kid. That leaves scars (obviously). So, when she realises she might lose someone she knew she was close with—she does whatever she can to get him back. Kairi wasn't able to do that with her home world, but maybe she could with Sora?

So! She immediately writes Sora a letter, puts it in a bottle and lets it float away. It's also probably why she takes such an active role in KH2, especially compared to KH1 where she was passed out for most of it and when she was awake she wasn't really doing much (like, Nomura, mate, couldn't you have had Kairi at least try to fend off some of the heartless??), but here she might still be getting kidnapped and stuff, but!! She's actually actively searching Sora out, trying to find him, fighting Axel, fighting the heartless with her keyblade, she's even the entire reason Sora even fucking found Riku, in the end. Now, let's fast forward to the end of KH2, Riku and Sora are stranded in the Realm of Darkness while Kairi is in Destiny Islands. She's alone, again. Imagine, finding two of your closest friends in the past, and then, bam! They're gone, again. And, again, you're helpless to do anything about it. That has to do something to your self-esteem, right? You've almost lost your friends twice, lost your world twice (kinda) and you couldn't do anything about it both times. It's like you're destined to be the only one left behind, the only one who can't take part in the Mark of Mastery exam, the only one who isn't in the Realm of Darkness or fighting Xemnas, the only one in the Realm of Light, and, the only one who will never be able to catch up with your friends.

So, the Mark of Mastery happens and Kairi's busy learning how to wield a keyblade with Lea/Axel. Just like how Sora's failures are getting to him, Kairi's incompetence is getting to her—I mean, have you heard her voice lines? She even fucking cuts her hair not because she thinks it's getting too long or something, but because she thinks Sora might like her more with short hair. It isn't about her, it's about how she needs to keep up, how she needs to be someone the others can turn to, how she needs to be on the same level as everyone else—because if she isn't, how will she ever be able to be there for her friends? How will she ever be able to stop being the 'damsel in distress'? She doesn't send her letters to Sora anymore, probably because she thinks she and Sora are no longer the same friends who could connect easily and talk to easily—she thinks Sora and her have gained some distance. Distance that could probably be shortened over time, maybe, but distance that is stopping her from being able to open up to him. Then, there's the whole paopu fruit thing where she gives Sora another good luck charm because, like in KH1, she's scared to lose him, again. So, she intertwines their fates, because what other reassurance does she have?

And, then, the whole thing with the Keyblade Graveyard happens where Sora has a mental breakdown, and Kairi isn't strong enough to be there for Sora—but, Riku is. I don't think she remembers that bit, but during the first timeline, she reaches out to Sora specifically. Maybe it's romance, or maybe it's her trying to be with him so she won't lose him again.

But, anyways, onto the second timeline. Sora loses Kairi again cause Xehanort's being an asshole as he does. This time, Sora has to sacrifice himself for Kairi to return—and so, she loses him, again. Only this time, it's all her fault (not that it really is, just what I think she thinks about the matter). And within seconds, her self-esteem probably crumbles—she's lost someone again, someone precious again, someone she couldn't save, someone who had to save her, just like how it was with her Grandma.

Okay!! Rambling about Kairi over, but, like, I could go on and on about how much losing her home world was like for her and all that jazz.

#kairi #kingdom hearts #riku #sora #just me rambling #thoughts about Kairi #kh #kh kairi

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coruscantide · 11 days ago

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the duality within a heart ( light & darkness )

In the distant past of the age of fairy tales, when the world was new, to the people there was only light. However, darkness is a natural consequence of light. Light begets darkness. Darkness seeks light. The two are fundamental forces within the universe and coexist inevitably as two halves of the same whole. You can’t have one without the other. People began to grow possessive and obsessive, and they began to covet the light and fight over it, and darkness was born in their hearts.

While not initially found in hearts, the darkness was something that naturally sought the light and expansion so likely out of survival instinct it found ways to worm into the heart through various means of unification ( possession, taking control of a person’s emotions, the bangles given out to union members ), replicating that same process in others as a corrupting influence, using vessels as reservoirs and spreading far and wide, acting like a parasitic virus.

As time passed, things changed. Over many years of integration, living, and existing together, darkness and hearts became entangled, reshaping living beings — who they were and what they could become. Hearts began to birth darkness on their own. Now they naturally produce both darkness and light and everyone has at least a bit of both inside them. People have spent more time with darkness in their hearts than without it. Given the nature of light and darkness and how they are meant to exist together, ironically this could have lead to the heart becoming complete and balanced.

Normal beings, Heartless, and princesses of heart exist on a spectrum regarding the amount of these two properties within their hearts. Heartless are on one end and the princesses are on the other, with everyone else in between. In the case of a Nobody they’re not even on it as they have no hearts at all. This spectrum likely affects what kinds of emotions someone would normally feel on a day to day basis. Most have a relatively normal emotional expression. Again, Nobodies have none at all due to a lack of a heart. Some can undergo drastic personality changes when one half of the equation is changed, like Ventus. This analysis of Ven pre and post removal of Vanitas shows a good job of illustrating what I mean. A person can then take that light / darkness inside them and channel it as a tangible power, bringing that force out and affecting the world around them. Usually in game you see this as the elements of light and darkness that you see characters using to shoot at enemies and each other.

But the light and darkness has core things that they stem from, which affects what they react to. What is that? What is light and darkness meant to be in Kingdom Hearts?

darkness

It's usually treated as an evil, corrupting force. Something malicious, hostile, and violent. It breeds and feeds heartless that lash out and steal hearts. All the villains are using and/or embracing it. Riku succumbed to it back in KH1, turning on Sora, getting possessed and struggling with it throughout most of the series. Despite all this, darkness within people is not evil. There's more to it than that.

In KH, "most are capable of controlling their heart's deep-seated emotions, but it is not easy for some" and so "when the negativity deep within someone's heart grows and can't be contained any longer, darkness is born". It can manifest from intense, negative emotions. Hatred, wrath, envy, loneliness, sadness, guilt, fear, doubt, insecurity, self hatred, and so on. Darkness is any negative emotion. Negativity as a whole it seems.

This is why by its nature, darkness is a little bit more caustic, a little bit more hard to handle than light, more volatile in general.

If a person, place, thing, memory, connection, whatever invokes negative emotions, darkness reacts to it. You could say this is where the term ‘darker emotions’ come from in this universe.

You can experience darker emotions without having darkness manifest itself, but doing so will feed the darkness naturally residing within you, resonating with it and enabling it to start growing. This can lead to the adverse side effect of a feedback loop which exacerbates those emotions, amplifying negative thoughts and feelings, allowing the person to spiral further. When one uses that darkness without caution, or are too tempted by the kind of power darkness can offer, it can draw you in too deep. Being consumed by darkness is the same as being consumed by negative thoughts of sadness, pain, revenge, overwhelming hate. Eventually, the amount of darkness can cross a person’s threshold and grow out of control, leading to it take over your heart if you let it. The darkness becomes too much for the heart to handle and you’re blinded by your feelings. The person completely loses sight of who they even are and their very existence. The heart separates from the body and they are then literally swallowed by their own emotions which shapes and creates the physical embodiment of their darkness — a heartless.

The shock of the heart being removed from the body is also enough to trigger the end of this process as well, the swell of negative emotions surging forth at the moment of death and dousing the heart with darkness, forming a Heartless. The Heartless are driven by instinct and emotions and act autonomously to inflict their negativity on others, their attacks able to corrupt even those with hearts of light, giving rise to new Heartless in turn. After all, misery loves company and negative emotions breed more negative emotion in the people around you.

This is how darkness works.

If a person has innate qualities that lets their heart have an inclination towards darkness, then by this logic they'd experience negative emotions more frequently. With enough negativity darkness grows, and the larger the darkness, the more often they feel this negativity. It’s easy access to a slippery slope.

Vanitas is the purest distilled example of all of this. His unversed are functionally the same thing as heartless. Rather than being individual hearts they are pieces of powerful negative stripped off one greater heart, arising from and returning to the source of pure darkness from which they came.

Most people are afraid to confront the darkness, what it means about themselves when they acknowledge that it exists inside them, but feeling negative emotions is normal and it's not healthy to force yourself to be positive all the time. It's completely fine to have bad thoughts or feelings. The real problem is the potential actions that can be driven by the intense emotions.

Let's look at two characters who use darkness. Sora and Riku.

Anti Form originated from when Sora got turned into a Heartless, and happens when he gets overcome by the power of darkness. It signals that he's more susceptible to negative emotions than ever. Anti Form stems from abuse of his drive power, but then in KH3 it evolves into Rage Form. It grew centered around a strong negative emotion and triggers for Sora when that emotion is too much for him to handle ( typically in moments of critical danger ). The overflow of darkness spills out and throws him straight into his pseudo heartless state. You can even see his darkness increase in his final battle with Xehanort, when the rage that sustains this mode — the same rage that had barely been kept in check after everything Sora just experienced — exploded out after Xehanort used the X-Blade to snatch the light out of his body.

Now, Riku's whole arc is about this. He is someone who fell to his own negativity and was completely taken over by it. He worked to come back from that. He had his ‘you have no power over me anymore’ moment with Ansem in DDD. "Consume the darkness, return it to light." Riku reconciled with his inner darkness somewhat and has better grips over it now compared to the start of the series, letting him harness its power without allowing himself to be swallowed up by it.

I say somewhat because of the kinda negative connotations they always refer to his darkness with. People in the series, including Riku, don't really focus on the fact that he can use darkness without being corrupted. We only hear how he's said to have "locked" the darkness within his heart and is "immune" to it. Remember that darkness is negative emotions. To me, I get the impression that they're treating his control over darkness as less overcoming despairs of his past / accepting the darkness for what it is and more denying the essence of darkness / only embracing its power. If they bother to, Riku fully coming to terms with the darkness and his negative emotions rather than just putting a leash on it and siccing it on his enemies is a possible character arc to explore. Also this means that the darkness Riku smells all the time is things like hatred, pain, sadness, etc.

When Ansem said darkness was the heart’s true essence, he was wrong. For the most part.

It’s a theory that stems from Xehanort's own pessimistic beliefs that light is essentially false. A masquerade people put on to fool themselves and justify their existence. Something to use as cover for the real thing underneath that could be stripped away to reveal the heart’s nature as darkness.

It is important to have darkness to exist and balance out the light, making it a core part of the heart. Perhaps he’s right that all worlds begin and end in darkness. However, the heart itself is different. It’s nature has been and always will be rooted in light. Even in the darkest heart, there’s a shred of light that never goes out.

light

To have a heart is to exist, and the first thing the heart is made of is light. It’s the foundation of the heart and everything that’s built on afterwards, including darkness.

Like with darkness, a person can have innate qualities that lets their heart have an inclination towards light. You might expect after reading all of that about darkness being the embodiment of negative emotions, that light also operates on the idea that it is positive emotions. However, you’d be wrong. Positive emotions are more so considered a frequent byproduct and thus share an association with light, but it’s not the source.

Think about it. The princesses of heart themselves don’t represent positive emotions. Sure, powerful emotions often drive their scenes and actions, things like love, hope, a desire to protect someone else, but they’re not always exclusively positive. To others, their light can even appear as things like charm and beauty in the case of Cinderella or Snow White being described as having “radiance” which references her inherent kind nature. But, light is often depicted as something you can search for and also something you can lose.

It actually seems light is more or less the embodiment of the connections a being has with others and to some extent the world around them. A connection is a relationship in which a person or thing is linked or associated with something else and so light is basically any part of the heart that connects to others. It’s the part that makes other people a part of who you are, forming memories and emotions. It is through others and the connections shared that you exist — that you have a heart. In other words, what the heart is all supposed to be about.

People can have traits and qualities that draw people to them and make it easier to form connections, and so they appear as light, like mentioned before with charm and beauty. Once you have that connection, the things created from it like love, affection, and friendship also appear as light.

Connections aren't just restricted to living people either. When you have a connection, even things like data, toys, machines, and empty puppets can be seen and eventually make hearts. I think that's why there was such a heavy emphasis on things like that in the latter half of the series. This is actually most clearly spelled out by both Joshua and Ansem in DDD.

Joshua — By ourselves, we're no one. It's when other people look at us and see someone - that's the moment we each start to exist. All they needed was for someone to see them, connect with them.

Ansem — The heart has always been quick to grow. Each exposure to light, to the natural world, to other people, shapes this most malleable part inside of us. Nobodies are not different from us in that manner. Sora was the only one able to return to his human form without destroying his Nobody. That is a statement to the love in his heart for other people, and the bonds that tie them together […] Our most precious treasures--even an empty puppet--the trees of the forest, and the petals on the wind--there are hearts around us everywhere we look. And it does not take superhuman powers to see them […] When he sees the heart in something, it then becomes real. When a connection seems broken, he may have the power to mend it. He has touched countless hearts, he has accepted them, and he has saved them.

The stronger the connection you have with someone or something, the stronger emotion you can experience towards it. This can include darkness/negative emotions (ex jealousy, hatred, greed), which you often see in the villains throughout the disney worlds. A cycle that also feeds into itself as a positive feedback loop, building both positive and negative emotions, further strengthening the connection. It reflects the conceptual context of lines like ‘the closer you get to the light, the greater your shadow becomes’ or 'the greater the light, the bigger the shadow it casts’ or ‘no matter how deep the darkness, a light shines within’.

Sora way back in KH1 also pointed a lot of this out the best in his discussion with Kairi, something that’s later mirrored in the scene in DDD where Riku needs to dive into Sora’s heart after Xehanort nearly snatches his body for a vessel: it doesn’t matter how deep the well of awful emotions you find yourself in, you have a connection to someone that can illuminate your way. Someone who can be that light at the end of the tunnel and pull you out of that darkness to bring you back. If you have someone important and believe in that connection, no amount of negative emotion will overtake you.

But breaking these links that form connections — the light, the heart — or at least obstructing and obscuring them and cutting a person off from others can cause the heart to collapse in on itself.

So light is the connection someone has with something else. How does that factor into what we see throughout the series? What examples can you see this in play?

First Sora. He has so many connections, to so many people and places, that he’s the ‘key’ that connects them all. That's why his light is so powerful and why it's emphasized so much. Even though he was an ordinary boy at first, through his connections he easily makes up for not initially being picked to wield the keyblade. But it’s also a double edged Sora, acting as a potential for a great darkness inside him.

Again look at Anti Form. It’s a Drive Form, a power that allows Sora to transform using the aid of his friends and partners into a form that is based on them and their power, basically drawing on his connection to them. Valor form with Goofy, Wisdom with Donald, Master as a combination of Valor and Wisdom while being based on Mickey, Limit seemingly on his past experiences and connections in KH1, and Final being Roxas. Drive Forms rely on his connections, but unlike the rest Anti Form is an after effect of Sora’s time as a Shadow Heartless and is a consequence as a result of over-using the Drive system and subsequently his connections. You can basically say Anti Form triggers in KH when Sora abuses his connections / light too much, causing it to briefly falter, leading to an unintentional overflow of darkness which throws him into the form.

Second, Kairi and Naminé. I’ll make another post about them regarding this but I’ll point out things here and there. As a princess of heart, Kairi’s light and her connections are extremely strong. Her connection to Sora allowed her to recognize him, restore his sense of self, essentially rebuild a body out of nothing for him, get Sora’s heart to open the Door to Light, and to keep him alive after everyone got bodied in the Demon Tide. She’s also the character most associated with stars, something that has always been symbolized as light in various ways. Kairi being a princess of heart can actually be seen as subtle foreshadowing as early as the association with the paopu, a star shaped fruit on Destiny Islands, because it represents an unbreakable connection, thus an incredibly strong light. There is the whole tracing the connection between hearts to find and then put together the final pieces of Kairi's heart ( will be another another post ).

Naminé also goes onto use a paopu as her charm, something that hints at her own connection with Kairi. With light being connections and inextricably tied to memories, where Naminé’s powers came from begin to make more sense. Kairi’s close relationship to light, the importance of memories, and her ability to draw on connections trickled over into her Nobody, who gains the powerful ability to trace those connections and then affect the heart via the vehicle of memories. As you can see with Naminé shattering Riku Replica's false memories, the shock taking his heart out with them and effectively breaking him, it’s very dangerous.

Third, the worlds themselves explicitly have hearts. They are not particularly feeling any emotion so they pretty much lack darkness, but they are connected to the life on them and their residents. Even when a world falls to darkness, it maintains those connections by dreaming the memories of its residents over and over again. This can be how a world has a heart. An accumulation of all of that throughout its individual history post war. The light of their heart is what is seen as stars, which is why when one goes out it means a particular world has disappeared from existence, most likely from destruction by the Heartless who seek out hearts full of light. It’s also noted that though the worlds may seem far apart and out of reach, they nonetheless remain connected by invisible ties. Also, callback to a little deep dive headcanon I made years ago about Radiant Garden ( the city of light ) once being Scala ad Caelum and therefore Daybreak Town ( a bastion of light ).

Fourth, the kerfuffle subplot between Cloud, Tifa, and Sephiroth in KH2. Cloud's strongest connection seems to be to Tifa, and thus she represents his 'light', while the bulk of his most negative emotions somehow tie to Sephiroth, making him his 'darkness'. In Cloud’s own words, as long as Sepiroth exists, he'll never wake from this nightmare. Sephiroth is the source of his strongest negative emotions, thus making him the physical embodiment of Cloud’s darkness.

When Tifa says “Cloud, you can have my light”, she is saying you can have the connection you with me, you don’t have to be alone anymore, you just need someone to be there for you and surround you with light. On the other hand, Sephiroth is going “the light doesn't suit you”, being around others doesn’t suit you. He’s trying to isolate him and cut off that connection to Tifa, to encourage the darkness to grow in his heart. Cloud is blinded by random flashes of light throughout this entire event possibly because he isn’t ready to face that connection to Tifa, it’s too much for him, and so he turns away from it. Maybe because a part of him believes Sephiroth and that he doesn’t deserve to be in that light, to have someone who cares for him.

Fifth, Nobodies. When you have no real emotions or can’t connect to others, what do you have? Nothing. You have nothing and you mean nothing to anyone, aka Nobodies. But when you start building connections as a Nobody, you can start building memories, start to have feelings about said culmination of memories, both good and bad. And then before you know it? Bam, new heart.

Other examples. Vanitas. He’s a creature who literally spawns negativity in the form of unversed and can't comprehend friendships and connections, soe’s constantly mocking Ventus for it. In Union Cross, Nightmare Chirithy states Nightmares like it exist to show people bad dreams, creating negative emotions in the heart and therefore darkness, allowing them to sever connections aka the light and live free of them. The power of waking is also probably a light power, but I’ll make a separate post to focus on that. And Kingdom Hearts itself. It is the heart of everything, where all hearts eventually return, and so it connects to everything and becomes the ultimate source of connection and light.

And finally I want to touch on the idea of false light the Master of Masters and Young Xehanort talks about in DR — “What you feel toward someone you love isn't always good or well-meaning. It can be a false kind of light. Which begs the question: are these messy feelings that emerge from love still light? Or are they darkness?” / "They believe themselves to be moral and virtuous, but it's all an act. Darkness lurks in the pit of everyone's heart. Their light is a total farce."

Xehanort tells the Master how he had seen many people with darkness hidden behind a false light within their hearts, claiming that they act like good people while secretly desiring great power. The weak stripping it from the strong under the belief that they deserve what they've taken from others and that their hollow reasons are justified to maintain a sense of self, causing their darkness to grow.

It actually ties into another conversation with the upperclassmen. "After we were left with only our hearts, we realized something ... There might not be a clear difference between the light and darkness in people's hearts. It's all about different beliefs. People want to believe they're right, so anyone who goes against them is wrong, making them darkness in the eye of the beholder. In every world there was strife born of conflicting beliefs.”

So with the added context of our new understanding, false light is a connection that has become by affected and twisted by negative emotions which can lead to unhealthy behaviours. Actions taken in the name of a connection and is driven by it, but ultimately causes real harm. All the while you justify and believe you’re “good”, “just”, “in the right”, “well-intentioned” or “doing this because you love/care about the other person”, often doubling down when you’re wrong rather than admitting your faults. It can be selfish, possessive, obsessive. Controlling and manipulating others. Abuse. It’s not genuine or healthy to the connection you share, nor does it nurture it and encourage it to grow. It stifles and poisons the connection. The whole thing becomes a complete sham.

Generally, it is people doing shitty things while believing themselves to have the moral high ground. People who think they’re doing what’s right when it comes to you, while they only hurt you and anyone who challenges that point of view is perceived as “darkness”.

Darkness hiding in the light, pretending to be pure while in reality it’s tainted.

In essence, false light is a toxic relationship. And all the implications that come with it.

You can see plenty of examples in the series. The Queen of Hearts denying darkness in her heart, claiming because of her position over her subjects she has the right to treat them however she pleases. Frollo acting as if he's a righteous man of god and really believing he is just in his actions against others because of it, when in reality he's using religion as a means to serve his own selfish needs and desire for power. Kind of like the Jedi, Eraqus condemns the darkness and insists that only the light is the way, seeking to suppress the darkness entirely and instilling his values to various degrees detrimental effects on his pupils, to the point of causing Terra massive insecurity issues about himself which leads to darkness. It eventually leads to his fear of the darkness driving him to attack his students and attempt murder, an action that can be definitely reasoned as for the greater good, but irreparably damages his bond to his students. He acknowledges as much that he failed them and darkness is within his own heart. Riku as well with his treatment of his friends in KH1. Him justifying all of his actions as for the right cause leads him to do a lot of terrible deeds as others around him take advantage of this, until it reaches his lowest point where he is vulnerable enough to have his body taken over.

Anyways, with the battle of light and darkness on the horizon, KH3 especially hammers home the theme of connections.

Olympus, Hercules saying that he was driven to save the one he loved who was in danger, and that true strength is seen as giving things "all your heart”. Twilight Town, when you are a creative person and use your creativity in ways that are hospitable and proactive, you will always draw people to you, making yourself and the people you love happy. Toy Box, the belief that no matter how far you are from your friends, your bonds are always there. Corona, experiencing the world around you and connecting with it and the people living in it. The act of saving / healing the ones who have been hurt and to bring back the person you want to be in your life. Monstropolis, being able to smile and laugh with others in the face of adversity and maintaining your optimism. Arendelle, selfless acts of sacrifice for the one you love, supporting someone who accepts themselves for who they are, and working past mistakes and misunderstandings to come out with a stronger connection in the end. 100 acre wood, the unintentional neglect of connections due to absence, but even if they fade they can always be found again and reestablished. Caribbean, there’s always enough time for hearts to say what’s true and there’s always a way to be with someone. San Fransokyo, being an inspiration for others and giving second chances.

And then, the guardians get wiped out completely and Sora gives up because without his friends he sees himself as nothing and unable to accomplish anything on his own so he’s swallowed by the darkness and dies. But there’s still someone who held on and has a connection to Sora, defying death itself to allow him to piece himself back together and save everyone else. That light in the darkness was still there.

In the end, being the focus of someone's heart can create light and darkness. But no matter how far away the light seems, the heart's voice will always reach it.

#✰.⠀⠀headcanon ﹕how little the heart forgets.#( super long post discussing the metaphysical nature of light and dark #what the heart is; a dash of existentialism; false light etc #i thought up most of this a little after kh3 release and even posted an outdated version of the darkness part on an old blog #but now it's time for the full two parter and to toss my analysis out there #all of this was mostly a segway for me to talk about kairi specifically and what it means to be a princess of heart next dsfgsdgf )

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