#thought • my only resolution is i'm allowed to change my mind.

[amcliawang]

tag drop!

[christopher-bangnaldoskzz]

Pairing: Minho x Reader 

Genre: Romance

Word count: 0.8k  

Warnings: none

A/N : honestly I’ve been looking at some of my old posts and thinking, God this is horrible 🤣😂🤣 expect more rewrites while I work my life out.

"We need to stop doing this, Minho," you said, your voice tinged with an unsteady blend of determination and vulnerability. As you spoke, Minho's warm lips pressed against the delicate curve of your shoulder blades, sending a shiver down your spine. His touch was tender and lingering, filling the air between you with a heavy tension that made it hard to breathe.

“I don’t understand what you’re referring to,” he says, his breath warm against the sensitive skin near the crook of your neck. The proximity sends a cascade of shivers racing down your spine, and you feel a flush creeping up your cheeks. You close your eyes, trying to steady your breathing while the world around you seems to fade, leaving only the intensity of his gase and the electric tension between you. The space between you is charged, and for a moment, you find it hard to focus on anything but the way his presence envelops you.

You take a deep breath, allowing the air to fill your lungs as you try to gather the courage needed for what you're about to say. The weight of your decision presses heavily on your chest, each heartbeat amplifying your anxiety. You can feel the tension in the air, a quiet anticipation hanging between you like an unspoken truth. With a trembling voice, you finally manage to utter the words that have been echoing in your mind. “We need to stop seeing each other,” you say, watching for his reaction.

You can feel your heart shattering into a million pieces as you witness the shock and betrayal wash over his face like a tidal wave. His eyes widen in disbelief, and for a moment, it seems as if time stands still. He stumbles backward, the weight of your words crashing down on him, leaving him momentarily speechless. You can see the internal struggle etched across his features—a mixture of hurt, confusion, and anger battling for dominance. As he processes the reality of what you’ve just said, the vulnerability in his expression pulls at your heartstrings. The air around you feels heavy, charged with unspoken emotions, and you can't help but feel a pang of regret as you observe the many emotions flickering in his eyes, each one deepening the chasm that now stretches between you.

Why are you saying this?" His voice trembles as he raises his gaze to meet yours, his eyes shimmering with vulnerability and a hint of desperation. You can feel the weight of the moment hanging heavily in the air. Taking a deep, steadying breath, you gather your thoughts, bracing yourself for the words that are about to come. "I’m sorry," you begin, your heart aching with every syllable, "but I can’t do this anymore.”

He locks his gase on you for a fleeting moment before diverting his eyes, his face a mask of neutrality. The air is thick with unspoken tension, yet deep down, you’re convinced this is the right decision to make.

He inhales deeply, his chest rising as he gathers air, then slowly exhales, releasing a shaky breath that seems to carry the weight of unspoken thoughts. The atmosphere feels heavy, laden with the gravity of the moment, and you can sense his hesitation, as if each second is stretching into eternity. "No," he finally utters, his voice barely above a whisper, reflecting an inner conflict that is palpable in the silence surrounding him., I don't agree" you are so confused. He looks away, avoiding your gaze. Your heart sinks as you realise he isn't going to change his mind. 

"Minho" before you can finish your sentence. He cuts off your words. 

"I'm sorry, but I can't let you go," he declares, his voice steady and resolute. The weight of his words hangs in the air as he furrows his brow, a deep crease forming in the middle of his forehead. His eyes, filled with a powerful determination, lock onto yours, revealing the conflict churning within him. The tension between you thickens as his posture grows rigid, making it clear that he won't back down easily from this decision. in his eyes shows he won't back down.

"Minho please.... my heart is already braking" 

"No, I love you," Minho declared, his voice steady yet filled with emotion. He gazed deeply into your eyes, as if searching for any sign of doubt. "I know we promised that once feelings began to develop between us, we would take a step back. But the truth is, I can't walk away from what we have. I love you too much for that."

With a passionate sincerity, he leaned in closer, his heart racing as he brushed his lips against yours. The kiss was soft, tender, and lingering; it felt like the world around you faded away. In that moment, nothing mattered except the deep connection that enveloped you both, fueling a determination to fight for your love, no matter what happens.

Taglist : @daceydeath @armystay89 @krishastumblernow @bakedlilgoonie

[fangsforiris]

Hiiii!!! I really like your blog because it coincides with my favourites from DL (I'm talking about Sakamaki mothers). It's honestly such a strange and rare thing in this fandom that someone is so interested in them. I've always been afraid to express any interest in these women, afraid that I would get a lot of hate. So I am incredibly happy that you write about them so freely and sensibly. Thank you for that ❤️ I wanted to know what motivated you to start writing about them? Because as I understand from your posts, you used to be indifferent to them, I would be glad to hear your answer. Have a nice day, talented girl 💖

Admin: Ah thank you!! I rlly appreciate that omg 😭!! Honestly I’ve been in this fandom for some time and admittedly I’ve always been interested in the mothers. In fact, Cordelia has always been a top 5 fav character slot for me!! Despite her being a villain—her actions obviously unconscionable—no one can deny her being well written.

I think I’ve only started writing about them since I’ve made it a New Year’s resolution of mine to not allow stigma/attack of the persons fallacy affect my creative output. For me, despite (at times) writing certain taboo or controversial—if not triggering—content, I use it as a way to bring recognition towards topics and reconcile my own troubles/experiences through it.

Writing is that medium for me to let it out, I suppose. And since I’ve been writing for YEARS (since I was 6 I believe?) I’ve always been passionate about it—and knowing others enjoy the works primarily made for me (at the start at least—), feels good knowing others can rejoice in the same topics I’ve found myself immersed in!!

Especially for the wives—they, along with the rest of the diaboys/cast—are MADE to be controversial. They are NOT good people. Even Yui. That’s the entire point of Diabolik Lovers. All characters walk the fine line between “good” and “bad.” Specifically, morally “good/white,” “bad/black,” & “grey.”

So I always find it weird how certain characters are attacked when…character development and certain framing from Rejet is the reason as to HOW we as a fandom can ENJOY/LIKE characters. They evolve, they CHANGE. And sure some relationships—even starring Yui—started out as horrible, we realize that soon after, Yui is content and appreciative of everything and her position. It’s bittersweet to us as a reader, but once we can escape a “victim” mindset and realize there’s no “perfect” idea of a victim, we as a society can better from it.

Since—Cordelia and Christa are actually victims themselves!! And that explains the CYCLE OF ABUSE shown in Diabolik Lovers.

Christa: the obvious, sexual assault resulting in the birth of a child of rape and incest. —However she was emotionally manipulated into sleeping with Karlheinz, as proven later on in MB and HDB—she has conflicting thoughts about Karlheinz due to it—and states she “knew what she was getting into” while also still holding the major principals for the consequences of those actions affecting her later on. Hence her broken, fragile state of mind.

Cordelia: she was groomed by Karlheinz, instantly marrying her when she became “of age/a lady of the court” when she was 18. Karlheinz would be the one to impose the ideals of how “love truly is” and how sexual exploits was normal—and the “correct way.” This lead to how she would influence Laito’s ideology in love and sex. Affecting how he’d have treated any woman—specifically Yui.

So I suppose with that, the wives have always been such a fun trio/dynamic to write and indulge in—especially since it’s such a grey area towards the fans.

Thanks for the question <33

[matan4il]

The ICJ ruling went about as well as I was expecting. No call for a ceasefire and no ruling on whether the war is a case of genocide, but Israel still has to send in aid (which it was already doing) and try to contain civilian deaths. All in all it said nothing new, made no decisive decisions and it just feels like we're back where we started but now Israel has to send in a report in a month. What are your thoughts on the ruling?

Hi Nonnie! Thank you for this ask. Yes, it went just as we thought it was most likely to go, and the explicit decision on the case was never going to be given during the decision of the provisional measures. If it's okay, I wanna combine my answer to you with this ask as well:

I've seen a few people mention that the ICJ not calling for a ceasefire probably indicates that the judges don't think a genocide is occurring at all. After all, if they believe a genocide is actively going on, why would you allow the side committing it to continue the fight? Granted, I'm seeing both sides claiming the ruling to be a victory for them. So, who knows at this point what any of it means?

Okay, so my feeling about this is complex. I mean,

On the one hand, I very much acknowledge that this is the best resolution on the subject of the provisional measures that we could have gotten. Anon, you're right. If there was any indication of an actual genocide, the ICJ would have decided in favor of Israel having to stop its fighting in Gaza. There apparently is a precedent, the ICJ did issue a provisional measure deciding on the end of Russia's fighting in Ukraine, based on the convention for the prevention og genocide. So yes, there's no reason why the ICJ wouldn't do the same here if South Africa had a strong enough suggestion of a case.

The reason why I still don't feel great is that I think the very discussion is a perversion of justice. It's like... think of a situation where you know there can't be a just result, because the court is biased. Think of a scenario where a political rival of the government is put on trial for murder in North Korea, where the judges are known to serve the interests of the government. To not be executed would probably be considered the best possible result, but it's still wrong that such a biased trial exists, that someone would be put on trial for merely being a political opponent.

Yes, each side got some things it wanted and lost some stuff (SA got the ICJ to ignore its abuse of the genocide convention, and got some provisional measures when legally the whole case should have been thrown out, while Israel got the fact that the provisional measure to stop the fighting, the only one the ICJ could grant that has real weight and impact, was not issued), but at the end of the day, Hamas celebrated the decision. Because it understands that even if no practical change comes from the ICJ's decision, it's another step in its war, which it runs parallel to its terrorism, to delegitimize Israel's very existence in the global public's mind. And on the most basic level, if an antisemitic, genocidal terrorist organization is happy with the ICJ's decision, I find it hard to be.

I hope this kind of explains why, even though I'm aware that the result was the best one we could get, it's still awful. To go back to how judge Aharon Barak, the survivor of an actual genocide, put it, the whole trial was like judging Able for Cain murdering him. Hamas should be put on trial. Hamas should be called out on, and persecuted for its genocidal intents and actions against Jews around the world. Hamas should be put on trial for crimes against world peace when it intentionally started a war against Israel. Hamas should be put on trial for war crimes perpetrated against its own Palestinian population when it has killed them intentionally, and intentionally put them in harm's way, to get killed in the fighting, when it used them as human shields. And anything less than that is a perversion of justice.

Thank you both, like I said, I do hope this helps. Take care!

(for all of my updates and ask replies regarding Israel, click here)

[pancake-stack]

Stuck with you: Chapter 3 WIP

Summary: When Vox gets trapped inside a virtual reality that grants his every desire, Alastor is sent in after him. Forced to play the role of devoted partner, Alastor must figure out how to get them both out of the program while learning how deep Vox's obsession for him goes and how he can use it to his advantage.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Charlie looked different.

Not completely, of course, she was still very much recognisable. But as he observed her closely, he picked up on the inconsistencies. The heavy bags under her eyes, her messy plait- not to mention her clothes, more rumpled than Vagatha would have ever have allowed her to wear outside the hotel.

It seems that Vox viewed the dear princess as an unprofessional and frazzled joke.

"Sir?"

Pulled out of his thoughts, he realised that he had been staring for slightly too long without responding to her and he was quick to rectify.

"Why, terribly sorry there, I was lost in my thoughts for a moment! How very rude of me. Would you care to repeat yourself, dear?"

Brightening at his non-dismissal, to which she was no doubt used to, she transferred the posters into the crook of her right elbow and offered her free hand for a handshake.

"Oh, it's no problem at all, I'm always getting lost in my own head." She chuckled and Alastor took her hand, still thoroughly charmed at her cheerful naivety.

"Um, let me try this again: I'm Charlie Morningstar and I run a rehabilitation hotel in the northern part of the city. We help sinners better themselves so they can ascend to heaven, which will stop our overpopulation problem!"

Waiting patiently for her to finish reciting the opening that Vaggie had probably helped her rehearse to reduce her rambling nature, Alastor gently but firmly removed his hand from her own.

Now, how to respond here? Vox had clearly removed his presence from the Hotel, so responding familiarly to her would only raise Vox's suspicions. On the other hand, if she was here then she had to have been in the public eye, if only to add to her humiliation, so he would know who she was. Taking a chance, he chuckled and leaned forward slightly into her personal space.

"Why no need to introduce yourself, everyone here knows who you are!"

He had barely finished his sentence before the television shop next to him, which he hadn't taken much notice of, coincidently changed their channels to showcase Charlie's disastrously hilarious interview with Katie Killjoy on every screen.

Well maybe not so coincidently, Alastor thought, taking note of a CCTV camera trained on him.

Charlie gave a nervous chuckle as her past self tackled Killjoy harshly to the floor and looked down at her posters in shame. Still, he had to give her credit when she raised her head after a few seconds and resolutely ignored the screens.

"So, um, would you like to try our redemption program yourself?"

Still hilarious to hear, even after all this time!

Unfortunately, he couldn't even get in a disguised jab at her proposition before Vaggie appeared and yanked her girlfriend behind her to shield her from Alastor's gaze.

Pointing her spear at his chest in a way that was very reminiscent of their first meeting, she spoke to Charlie without taking her eye off him.

"Charlie, what are you thinking? You can't just approach the Radio Demon of all people!" She hissed, eye betraying her frantic feelings that he was here at all.

Now that was a sentiment he liked to hear.

"Do you want Vox to hunt us down for fucking with his partner?"

Never mind.

His ears flickered down in response to his agitation at the implication he was only intimidating because he was associated with Vox. How dare she. To suggest that his reign of terror could be outclassed and overshadowed by new-fangled technology?

He was half-tempted to find a busy street and start his radio show early to release some of this building anger. He might have done so if he had been back in reality and not in Vox's blasted fantasy world.

Seeing Vaggie eye him wearily and tightening her grip on her spear, Alastor recognised he was getting angry. Such a reaction would only alert Vox that their little liasion was not what it seemed, which would make all of this shit had been a waste of time. Taking time to slow his breathing to calm himself down, he forced himself to raise his ears and soften his posture to regain his earlier relaxed appearance. And if his smile bared his teeth more than usual, that was no one's business but his own.

Dematerialising into the shadows and rematerialising behind the two women, he slung his arms around their shoulders, revelling in their panicked flinches and yelps.

"Now, now dearies, let's not cause a scene in such a quaint area." he exclaimed, nodding at the neon nightmare with as little distate as possible, "Come, let us continue our civil conversation from earlier. I'd love to hear what you've heard about me. Perhaps over a nice dessert?"

He wouldn't let the two leave, not when it was so suspicious that they of all people had approached him in the first place. There was a chance he could get information from them, no matter how irritated he was with their mannerisms.

Vaggie gave a low growl but Charlie's eyes sparkled at his hospitality. "Oh yes, that's a great idea! C'mon Vaggie, you love sweets."

Faced with the eager grins of both her girlfriend and the Radio demon, Vaggie reluctantly relaxed her grip on the spear and gave a reluctant nod. She cast a concerned look in the direction of V Tower before following them into the bakery with a deep sigh.

The inside was still far too modern for Alastor's tastes, but it wasn't as outrageous as the outside had been, so he made do. However, he did have to wonder if a bakery even needed this many cameras. At least the wait time was none nonexistent- the staff practically fell over themselves to sit the group down.

He told the girls to order anything they wanted, ignoring Vaggie's mumbling about how it was free for him anyway, and placed his own order for the fruit tart he saw in the window and a coffee with cream. Charlie and Vaggie soon followed suit and ordered a chocolate and strawberry cake with matching glasses of juice.

Once their food arrived, he purposefully ignored the two's idol chatter to enjoy his first bite of the delightful dessert. The sweetness of the custard mixed well with the juiciness of the fruit and he let loose a small hum of appreciativeness, his shadow twirling contently around his chair.

His ears twitched as they caught the sound of the cameras whirling as they zoomed in on his figure. He winked at the camera closest to him and took great joy in watching it spark slightly.

Predictable as always, he thought, almost fond.

Reluctantly turning back to the girls, he took another bite of his food before asking, "So, what else have you heard about me?" Seeing their reluctance, he pointed his fork at them playfully, "Come now, I do so love to hear theories from others."

Naturally, Charlie was the one to talk first, "Well, I don't actually know that much about your past. But! I do know that you have power over the Radio and you're part of the AVs."

Well, that's not very helpful, he knows all of that. Though Vox changing the name of the group to the original name he had pitched to him seven years ago, that was certainly new.

"How do you not know their past, hun? It's common knowledge." Vaggie asked incredulously, turning in her seat slightly to properly look at her partner. "You've been around longer than I have."

"Yeah, I know but Dad never let me out of the castle much growing up. Plus other demons are a bit... um, shy around me I guess, so I don't get to hear much gossip." Charlie admitted, playing with the ends of her hair as she often did when discussing subjects that were unpleasant to her. Not willing to admit that her own subjects thought of her as a fool to be avoided and mocked.

It seems Vaggie picked up on that piece of information regardless, as she bit her tongue to repress thoughts of those who had interacted with Charlie to that degree.

Taking a soothing breath, she patted Charlie on her back and gave her a soft smile once she met her eyes, "Don't worry, Hun. I'll always be here to help you out. I've picked up a lot of information since falling down here."

Sensing an opening, Alastor wasted no time butting into the touching scene that was blooming. "That may be true, but, you still have not said what you know about my story. Surely you aren't all prattle?"

Charlie quickly answered before Vaggie could do something impulsive with her irritation; such as take her half-eaten cake and aim it at his head.

"Vaggie knows all sorts of things, i'm sure she'd be happy to tell you!" Vaggie settled back in her seat at the words but still gave him a vicious glare as Charlie continued, "Besides, it'd do me good to hear about Hell's history."

Though still looking far from pleased at the request, Vaggie still caved at her girlfriend's appeal, as Alastor knew she would. He couldn't recall a single time that she didn't go along with her schemes.

Nonetheless, he leaned back in his chair as Vaggie reluctantly began her tale, encouraged by Charlie's own smile.

"It started seven years ago. Before they were together, the tales of the rivalry between the Media demons for control of Hell were legendary. Their brawls would level cities, destroy businesses and massacre anyone in the vicinity."

She paused for breath and dramatic effect before continuing, "That was until one day, when Vox asked Alastor to become his partner. He refused, and the ensuing battle levelled the entire South Ring's residential district."

Well, she sure knew how to paint a picture- then again, he had always found her to be overly dramatic when recounting hell's history. The fight in the south ring was true, though, they hadn't fought to that extent before that.

He did have to wonder why this version of himself didn't simply accept Vox's invitation in this reality. After all, it was clear his cooperation was what Vox truly wanted. It must have badly wounded his pride for Alastor to have been able to so easily reject him.

He didn't have time to ponder this query further as Vaggie continued her tale, "Of course, Alastor was defeated." At that statement, her eyes took on a sadistic glee.

Bitch.

"He was then dragged off by Vox and wasn't seen again until two months later at a press coverage, where their new alliance as partners was announced to Hell."

Oh my, only two months for Vox to get bored of besetting him? With all that man's boasting, he would have expected to have been tortured for half a year at the very least.

Then again, being forced to be part of an ever-growing, ever-changing brand that keeps up with modern times is frankly worse than torture to him.

[entomolog-t]

Ohh we’re being evaluated huh?

My favorite scenarios are ones involving curious giants and tinies that desperately want to run away but can’t

A tiny is trapped and a giant finds them, helping them out of the trap and offering safety, food, even letting them go. The tiny is suspicious— what could this giant possibly want? There’s no way that they’re just being kind for the sake of it, everything they’d ever been told suggested that all giants were evil and they should be dead or in a jar right now. The tentative curiosity and choice to stay of the tiny toasts my eggs and scrambles my bread. The initial terror turned confusion turned curiosity turned delight. Mwah, chef’s kiss.

Also the reverse, where a giant who hates tinies gets stuck with one and slowly comes to realize that they absolutely adore them. I love those equally as much.

Dying to know if this says anything about me, assuming you’re still doing these ^^ /nf

BACK IN OFFICE BABY

This is quite the interesting scenario to discect.

So the main theme of note would be subverted expectations- interestingly, this tends to crop up quite frequently in G/t media.

Typically, this can imply some sort of projection of the self, or some reframing of another.

The main thing I would suggest to consider are the traits associated with the giant, as well as what the tiny/and possibly others think of the giant.

Even if you are more tiny aligned, I would still take the time to consider what traits are shown, and ask yourself if any of those reflect personal feelings.

A regularly occurring theme is to project ones own attributes that we see as misunderstood or overlooked onto the giant. Being shy, or intimidating can lead to us feeling unapproachable, and plant that seed in our subconscious that "If only someone got to know me, they would see that I'm [Defining Trait]"

Though that is certainly not the only route. There is another common trend in G/t, and fantasy as a whole, to reframe negative emotions- even fantasizing a different resolution. Do the "scary" traits of the giant remind you of a time you were wronged by someone? It might be that your brain is trying to reframe it to help with coping. The reframing allows for fantastical leeway to suggest they were not actually wronging you- their intentions were just misunderstood. Those thoughts help the mind to feel more in control because it shifts the blame from someone not liking you or intentionally hurting you to being a misunderstanding- a far more comforting concept that being malicious.

Reframing doesn't have to just occur with the giant archetype either. The tiny holds bias and preconceived notions of how they anticipate someone "dangerous" to act. Does the tiny remind you of anyone? perhaps someone that judged you over something you could not change?

As weird as it may be to say, the brain likes metaphors. There is a great deal of meaning within our subconscious imagery. Peeling back the layers and trying to determine what each character represent is quite the peak into the inner workings of our psyches.

Theres also another very interesting projection that could be occurring on the tiny. Do they share any negative or mistaken traits? Are these traits mirroring traits of your own?

The fact the tiny cannot comprehend why someone would be nice for the sake of being nice to them could be very telling about our own internal self reflection- and its important to analyze what traits of our own we might see of as unworthy of unconditional love/kindness.

I hope this breakdown could offer you some insight into the inner workings of this dynamic trope!

Thank you for attending this session, please see my secretary on the way out to book any follow up appointments.

[suchine-toki]

hello! I read your Tae meta from last year and just wanted to say it was great and really gets to the bottom of the problems with how Sorachi handled Otae. My (unasked for ;)) two cents is that I think he was going for GinTae endgame but then changed his mind somewhere before Lesson 238 which I read as his way of giving a 'this is how it would happen but I'm not going to do it' resolution for GinTae. And it's fine to drop the romance but knowing he's not going to make any couples endgame and 1/2

Hi! First of all, thanks for reading and taking your time to send this to me, I really like hearing other people's thoughts! I hope you don't mind that I combined both asks, given that they've points in common and I already had a draft of the one I received a while ago 🙈 This made me realize that I hadn't thought about it too much before… Even if I've talked about this topic with other people before, usually, the conversation ends with us agreeing and moving on to other topics lol so I think this is the first time I'm analyzing it. I'll try to do it from both the characters' perspective and Sorachi's intentions as the story's author. Before continuing, I want to clarify that my intention isn't to convince anyone to stop liking it, I just wanted to explore this topic and wow, did I explore it, because it ended up being much longer than expected 😂

That said, I think one of the biggest reasons why many of us thought Tae was going to be Gintoki's main love interest is because of the setup. Tae is the first woman from the main cast to appear in the series, and her dilemma kickstarts the story and allows for the formation of the Yorozuya as we know it. Moreover, she's Shinpachi's older sister and also develops a strong bond with Kagura, so it was expected that she would also develop a strong romantic bond with Gintoki, connecting her to the main trio of Gintama.

However, as I mentioned in the previous post, things started to change with the introduction of Kyuubei, which solidified the Kondo-Tae-Kyuubei love triangle, and then with the introduction of Tsukuyo. I watched a video by Abbie Emmons titled "7 Deadly Romance MISTAKES Writers Make ❌ avoid these chemistry killers!" to help identify some points in the relationship between Gintoki and Tae, although I must mention that I don't think these were mistakes on Sorachi's part, quite the opposite, they were very conscious decisions. I won't go point by point; instead, I'll summarize the intent of the message.

Half of the video is about the development of intimacy between two characters. I think most of us can appreciate that at least until the Benizakura arc, it was clear that Sorachi still had in mind to develop the relationship between Gintoki and Tae romantically because they'd a scene where they were alone, had time to talk, and showed that they cared a lot for each other. However, as the series progresses, we stop seeing these kinds of scenes between them, as well as scenes where they're seen thinking about each other or having physical contact.

And although at the beginning of the series Tae participated more actively in the Yorozuya dynamics, after the introduction of Kyuubei, they're seen spending most of their time together, even when they're with the others. Tae remains an honorary member of the Yorozuya until the end, but it's clear that Sorachi wanted her to represent stability, emotional support, the place they can return to that will welcome them with a smile. So, even though Gintoki and Tae still care a lot for each other, their interactions will continue to be framed within the context of the Yorozuya for the rest of the series.

That said, I couldn't say exactly when Sorachi stopped considering a romantic relationship between them. I'd to look up chapter 238 because I didn't remember what it was about lol (for reference, it's the one where they're at a stall and there're only speech bubbles, in which other characters who look like Gintoki and Tae confess they're in love), and I think your interpretation is certainly interesting. The placement also makes sense, which is shortly after the arc introducing Tsukuyo, and it also follows the trend of other characters being the ones who tease them, and not themselves.

The other half of the video is about how the characters' relationships with the rest of the cast are shown. It's highlighted that there needs to be an emotional reaction from a character to the idea of the other being interested in someone else, something Sorachi showed in many different ways but not with Gintoki and Tae. In her case, at most, she was shown getting annoyed at Sacchan, but only when she was provoked first. When it came to Tsukuyo, there was no reaction. Similarly, Gintoki has no reaction when Kyuubei or Kondo demonstrate their love interest.

The last point of the video, but not less important, is when characters have more romantic chemistry with other characters. In Tsukuyo's case, I think Sorachi was already a more experienced writer who knew his characters better and knew what his story needed. In particular, I think he wanted Gintoki to have someone close with whom he could relate but who wasn't directly connected to his past, among other things. And as I mentioned before, most of Tae's emotional energy in the series is with Kyuubei, followed by Kondo.

But why Sorachi didn't continue developing Gintoki and Tae's relationship romantically? The most obvious reason is simply because he didn't want to lol, but the explanation behind this, I think, is due to two main reasons. The first is that he wanted to keep the relationships within the Yorozuya platonic, and since Tae is an honorary member of the Yorozuya, it felt wrong to establish that there were romantic feelings involved. By comparison, it would be like confirming a relationship between Kagura and Shinpachi. And yes, Sorachi did some ship-teasing more than once between them too, but at the end of the day, he chose not to pursue it, and I think maintaining the familiarity is a cause.

The other reason is that as he wrote the story, he realized that Gintoki and Tae didn't fit well together. Tae can give Gintoki a sense of stability, but what can he offer her? Tae clearly values stability as well, hard work, having money. But Gintoki, due to his circumstances, doesn't meet those standards. If you think about it, the only two occasions when Tae unequivocally showed interest in Gintoki were when he lost his memory (Memory Loss arc) and when Hijikata was in his body (Soul Switch arc). Two occasions where Gintoki wasn't himself. But she liked that he seemed more serious and diligent, which implies that Tae's type is different.

It's also worth mentioning that Gintoki isn't shown making the same gestures towards Tae that Kondo or Kyuubei, the other two characters who are canonically in love with her (which is why I think they're a good benchmark) do. For example, while Sorachi chooses to show Gintoki teasing Tae about her breast size, in contrast, he shows Kondo buying her a kimono that will look good on her regardless, you know, like a supportive partner would. Even with all this, I understand that het shippers might've felt uncomfortable with the idea of pairing Tae with Kondo, and the other viable option was Gintoki. I think Sorachi was also aware of this, which is why he decided to develop Kondo and Tae's relationship in the final arcs.

While we're at it, I prefer kyuutae by faaar. As I've also expressed before, although I think Kondo is a great character, his persistence doesn't sit well with me. But whether it was due to heteronormativity or because Sorachi identified with him as a fellow gorilla, it's clear to me that he decided to emphasize Kondo and Tae's relationship much more. Even when gintsu and kyuutae were stagnating, he continued developing kontae as much as he could (probably because he'd already done the heavy lifting with the other two ships, tbf).

Sorachi didn't plan many things in his story, which I think is both a strength and a weakness. One of the things that reflect this is, for example, that Hasegawa was originally going to be part of the Yorozuya, an idea he later abandoned, but the remnant of Hasegawa's presence in the series remained. In the same way, I think his initial idea was to pair Gintoki with Tae, but eventually, he didn't. It seems that he also had the idea at the beginning to end the series with certain couples, but later decided to leave an open ending in that sense, although some of his inclinations were clearer than others.

I've seen people say there're subtle hints throughout Gintama that they fell in love, and while I don't want to say those interpretations are wrong, I think Sorachi is quite straightforward when it comes to these kinds of things. Even with unrequited loves, like (apparently) in the case of Katsura and Ikumatsu, he showed that there was love. However, in the case of Gintoki and Tae, during the 15 years he wrote the manga, he didn't, probably because he felt it no longer fit the story after a certain point. That said, I think their relationship works just fine without the need for any labels.

Thank you again for stopping by, if you've another point that you would like to discuss feel free to message me or send another ask 🤗

[psychics4unet]

Hello there,

Id like to ask please for a reading regarding my situation right now.

I wish to know the reason why my friend A deleted our chat and left me abruptly without informing me first. We have been good online friends for almost 7 months and his last message to me was that I am free to text him anytime I want. Our conversations do not necessarily need to be replied eveyday as its alright for us to respond like once a week during weekends because of our worklife and personal lives. I ended up not replying to him almost 2 weeks as I had busy rollercoaster weeks and my mind is disorganized and unsettled. I wanted to reply to him when my mind is at ease so I can give him my full attention while reading his messages and taking time to reply. Then it happened. I was about to reply to him the 2nd Saturday but our chat got deleted.

It seems he left a message for me but he deleted it too so I was not able to see it. I wonder what his reason was as his sudden disappearance does not coincide with his last message for me.

I hope he doesn't have negative feelings for me.

He's friendly and affectionate in our chats and he sometimes would joke about stuff. I wish to know what his true feelings are and why he ended up severing our connection. He told me many times that he wanted his presence to be here with me so we can spend some quality time together. I tried reaching out to him so I can tell him about my feelings and thoughts as I finally accepted our parting but he only responded with a quote about the inevitability of goodbyes and how the pain lingers. And sometimes the more we interact with each other, the harder it will be to bid each other farewell. But there is still the hope of crossing our paths again.

Sorry for the long message, i just want to clarify the situation so perhaps you can give me some clarity about this. Thank you!

MLA ♎

Free Cloud Divination (7$ PAID READINGS ARE ALSO OPENED!)

Hello,

As I gaze upon the clouds, I see a formation that is initially light and flowing, but then it starts to twist and grow darker 🌥️. This represents the connection you once shared - light, easygoing, and comfortable - but something shifted, perhaps unexpectedly. The twisting motion of the cloud suggests that there were internal or external pressures that caused this abrupt change. It seems there was an emotional cloud of confusion or uncertainty that your friend might have been dealing with, which led to this sudden departure.

A second cloud comes into focus - it's small but dense 🌫️. This cloud reflects the weight of emotions and the difficulty of handling feelings that were perhaps too overwhelming to confront or share. It suggests that your friend might have been feeling emotionally conflicted, and maybe the distance created was a way for them to process their own emotions or protect themselves. It’s not necessarily about you, but more about their internal struggles that led to this decision.

The third cloud I see is a clear sky 🌤️. This signifies hope and the potential for resolution in the future. The cloud opening up to a calm space represents the possibility that, in time, the emotional fog will clear. It doesn’t necessarily mean you’ve lost this connection forever, but the timing might not be right for the two of you to reconnect just yet. Your friend may need time to navigate their own feelings, and this moment of silence could be part of their personal journey.

Overall, the message from the clouds is that while there may have been feelings of hurt or misunderstanding, the future holds the possibility for both clarity and healing. You may not have all the answers now, but there is still space for potential reconnection, even if it takes time. Trust in the flow of things, and allow both you and your friend the space to grow and reflect.

Got questions or need some insight into your life? I'm here to help with personal psychic readings! For just $7, you can get answers to up to 7 questions! More info at:

In case anyone else here on tumblr would like a free psychic reading (cloud divination), Click the link and follow the instructions (I answer only to those who follow the instructions, thank you):

[saphig-iawn]

Day 14 & 15 of Turning me into Me

I skipped a day, and I needed it. Not that this journaling process is hard or expends a lot of energy, it just kinda giving myself a bit of space yesterday kinda allowed me to reflect on something.

In my plan to turn me into Me, I'm walking every single day. I aim to walk for an hour, and to make sure I don't make it overly toxic and competitive I try not to focus on the distance or steps taken. I'm doing this with some friends too and we write about our walks to keep us motivated in a way that doesn't feel like we're creating an obligation. But yesterday I didn't walk.

I didn't want to but if I did I would've caused myself damage to my leg. And even though it was the right thing to do, I felt guilt. I felt guilt because I could've walked, and taken my time and made adjustments, but then I realised that my guilt was actually fear. I was scared that if I stopped then I wouldn't start again. While the moment that drove me to undertake this transformation before I start HRT was powerful, it felt far enough away that the power was waning a bit. I think I'm in that space between where a chosen action becomes a habit or ritual. It feels good to do it, but it is still a chosen thing. And then my mum began to creep into my mind... that because I didn't walk I would be actively reversing progress, that I would be betraying myself. That I would begin sliding down a slippery slope of cop outs until I was worse off than when I started.

But today I walked. I felt those feelings of wanting to not walk like I did on Day 1. You know that feeling after the joy of deciding to something for yourself, like a New Year's Resolution, but putting it off to the next day. Or promising to eat better, but after you have this night of takeaway food. I felt those whispers roil and bubble, but I still went and walked. My leg still hurts a little bit, but I walked. I stopped when I needed to and when I did I needed to just banish my mum from my head and be present on the journey I'm taking.

God I want to tell her what she's done to me. I want her to know how she has affected my thoughts and my perception of myself. But I know how much that would hurt. I know how she would feel. And despite of all the shit she has put me through, I couldn't bring myself to willingly hurt someone like that. If only she could do the same for me.

She actually visited a few days ago, with my sister and niece. It was my sister's first time seeing me without a beard. All they could focus on was my weight... the looks, the changes, where I'm thinning out. Not how I am, or what I've been up to, or why I'm losing body fat in the first place. No. Its good to know that's all I am for them right now, their own personal weight loss show. But then my mum was quite clear in how she wanted to get back to "normal".

Tomorrow is another day. I'll be better than I was today, even if I don't see it or feel it, and I'll be even better the next day.

[readingtoinfinity]

Arcane updated thoughts

Spoilers for the end of season 2! I won't discuss much more than vaguely but you've been warned.

I've been seeing a criticism a lot of the end of the show, specifically that the conflict between Zaun and Piltover isn't resolved by the conclusion of the show, beyond Sevika getting a seat on the council.

And I had to think about it for a bit; I thought there was something missing in the finale and couldn't think of what, but that criticism put into words what I'd been thinking about.

There's two ways I can think of this: the show failed and did a bad job, or we're supposed to look at the events and themes and draw our own conclusions. For the benefit of the doubt (and to have something to think about in the shower) I went with the second thought. And I think I did come up with something.

Season 2, episode 7 is one of if not the best episode in the show, detailing what happens to Jayce, Ekko and Heimerdinger when they vanished from the Hextech tower. Jayce goes through his own Elden Ring/Dark Souls experience and Jayce and Heimerdinger get to experience a better timeline where Hextech doesn't exist and everything has improved.

And I stuck on this. A lot of the problems between Zaun and Piltover existed prior to Hextech but were made worse by it. The first Zaun rebellion happened and was put down with the original technology, and in the better timeline these feelings wouldn't have gone away, either. Silco and Vander's breakup also happened, but in the better timeline they've patched things up to become friends again.

That's interesting. That things improve so much in six or seven years after alt!Vi dies. As if the show is telling us "Without Hextech things would have gotten better", to the point that the bridge becomes a market when it was a boundary in the original timeline.

We can see this bear out in the show: Ambessa only came to Piltover because they had tech she wanted. The Gray was a by-product of Hextech. The wealth that Hextech brought went only to the wealthy and made them rely less on Zaun for labor. I think episode 7 wasn't just a look back at how things could have been, it was a glance forward at how things will be.

Finally, two themes about the show stick out: trusting again despite past experiences and preventing things from getting worse. A lot of season 1 is about scrambling to keep things steady so they can be improved, but outside forces (mostly Ambessa, TBH) stirring the pot and making things worse. And the resolution of the show is about reaching out your hand one last time, to risk being hurt to help an old friend.

I think a lot of this could have been said explicitly. Maybe an epilogue where we show work being done to improve the two cities' relationship. We know there'll be a bond of comradery that wasn't there before, because they all fought together against Ambessa's forces, and that the Enforcer population has dwindled and the wealthy have lost their cash cow with Hextech that means the labor of Zaun will become more valuable, which will give them a bargaining chip, and Sevika has a seat at the table to entreat as their voice. The pieces are there, but the finale didn't weave them together.

But ultimately, I think this criticism isn't fully-fleshed out. The show told us numerous times that, if you only reach out your hand and work with somebody, things can only get better. It's not explicitly hopeful or happy, but it could be.

I may end up changing my mind on this. I dunno; I'm very emotional about the show and I'm still in the defensive stage over it. But I do appreciate seeing the original criticism and giving it a mulling-over; it allows me to think more about one of my favorite shows of the past few years.

[ashbrat488]

Foul Play - Chapter 4

Henry quietly walked into class the next week, his eyes immediately drawn to Millicent and Ben engaged in a conversation near her desk. Slipping in unnoticed beside her, he discreetly listened to their exchange, trying to gauge the nature of their interaction.

"So, are you coming to the game this Saturday?" Ben asked eagerly, a hopeful expression on his face. Meanwhile, Millicent nervously fiddled with her pencil in her hand, contemplating her response.

"I haven't decided yet..." she replied, her voice filled with uncertainty.

Ben chuckled, understanding her hesitation. Leaning over the desk, he placed both palms flat on the surface, his eyes fixed on her. "Fair enough. If you do come, I'll take that as you agreeing to let me take you out to dinner afterward..."

A soft giggle escaped Millicent's lips as she shrugged slightly, mirroring his words. "Fair enough."

"Okay," Ben said, his hand reaching up to gently tuck a strand of Millicent's hair behind her ear, leaving a lingering touch before he departed. He shot a wink in Henry's direction, a gesture that did not go unnoticed by him.

As Henry watched Ben's interaction with Millicent, a pang of jealousy coursed through him, seeing another man making physical contact with her. Unable to contain his emotions, he leaned toward Millicent, unable to mask the irritation in his voice. "You're really going to go out with him?"

"It's none of your business," she mumbled, her gaze shifting to the front of the classroom as the teacher began the lesson, signaling the start of the class.

Henry's heart sank at her response, realizing that his attempt to voice his concerns had only pushed her away further. He knew he had no right to interfere, but he couldn't help but feel a mix of regret and frustration over the situation. Throughout the class, his attention wavered, his mind preoccupied with thoughts of Millicent and the budding connection she seemed to be forming with Ben.

***

Henry hurriedly chased after Millicent as she walked away from class, reaching out to grab her arm gently in an attempt to make her stop. However, she held up her hand, cutting off any potential conversation before it could even begin. "Unless it has something to do with school or homework, do not speak to me."

Letting out a frustrated groan, Henry took a deep breath, carefully choosing his words. "I just want to try and be friends, Milly."

A scoff escaped Millicent's lips, accompanied by a dismissive shake of her head. "Friends? You mean when it's just the two of us, secretly hiding our connection? Only until one of your teammates teases you? Are you so immature that you can't even stand up for yourself and make your own decisions? No, we can't be friends. Because you're not the type of guy I'd want to be friends with."

"Milly..." Henry mumbled, feeling the weight of her words hitting him. He watched as she turned and walked away, her figure growing distant. He couldn't deny that her assessment of him was accurate. He had acted immaturely and allowed others' opinions to influence his choices. How could he become someone she actually wanted to be friends with? Someone who deserved her friendship?

Deep in thought, Henry walked away from the encounter with Millicent, a resolute expression on his face. He realized that he couldn't simply expect Millicent to change her opinion of him without actively working on himself. He needed to prove that he could be good enough to be her friend and, perhaps, even more.

***

"So, you have both Henry Cavill and Ben Walker vying for your attention and you're saying no to both?"

Millicent and Abby's playful banter filled the room as they sat comfortably on the couch. Despite the lighthearted atmosphere, Millicent's inner turmoil weighed heavily on her. With a soft chuckle, Millicent responded, "Yeah, it's quite a situation, isn't it? I haven't made up my mind about Ben yet. I'm still considering it." Her voice carried a hint of uncertainty, revealing the internal struggle she grappled with.

Abby, always the supportive friend, offered her perspective, nudging Millicent's shoulder gently. "I think you should give it a shot. If you don't want to go alone, I'll gladly accompany you. Who can resist watching men in tight shorts tackling each other, right?" Her playful tone aimed to lighten the mood.

Millicent couldn't help but laugh, appreciating Abby's carefree nature. She handed her friend a bag of crisps, grateful for the small gesture. "You're too good at this, Abby. Talking to guys comes so naturally to you. It's not as easy for me," Millicent confessed, her voice tinged with a touch of self-doubt.

Comfortingly, Abby patted Millicent's leg before resting her head on her friend's shoulder. "You underestimate yourself, Milly. You're gorgeous, and men love that accent of yours. You have so much to offer. Don't let past experiences define your future."

Millicent rolled her eyes affectionately, acknowledging Abby's words. "I know, I know. But it feels like I've only attracted more trouble than anything else."

Understanding the weight of Millicent's struggles, Abby sighed empathetically. "I understand why you feel that way. But Ben seems genuinely nice, and he's undeniably cute. At least give him a chance by accepting dinner."

"We'll see," Millicent responded with a sigh, sinking deeper into the couch. She contemplated her choices, her thoughts drifting to Henry, thinking once that he was different than he is. The painful memories of their past came flooding back, reminding her of the hurt she had endured.

Abby's words echoed in Millicent's mind, reminding her that not all men were the same. Ben's consistent kindness and respect stood in stark contrast to the way Henry had changed over time.

Resting her head on the couch, Millicent resolved to take her time and weigh her options carefully. She would trust her instincts and not rush into a decision. Whether it meant giving Henry an opportunity to redeem himself or exploring the possibilities with Ben, she would prioritize her own happiness and well-being.

Chapter 5

[stepfordgoth]

I keep trying to make goals/resolutions for the new year but I'm stuck. I've never been very good at making goals. Last year I think I kept it completely abstract like "in 2024 I want to continue improving myself in every possible healthy way", which is, of course, not really a goal. Goals have to be specific and have to have a time limit to achieve them and a way to measure your progress. Among other things. Im referring to the SMART goals system right now btw:

However I will say, despite it not being a goal set scientifically, I do think I did improve vastly in the last 12 months and I certainly wouldn't call that goal a failure! Compared to where I was last year, here are some of the things Ive achieved:

I am drinking way less frequently (and way less in general) now since this time last year (I was becoming messy tbh)

I joined a gym for the first time ever in my life in august, and I fell in love with it fast. What a confidence boost to not only be going to the gym regularly at all, but to commit to it after the idea of it has scared you for so long. And then to fall in love with the gym too! I'm giving myself lots of praise right now, thats a brand new set of several skills I acquired when I decided to walk into the gym! Compare that to the girl I was a year ago who was drinking way too much and not eating healthily and getting enough exercise and gaining weight because of all of these things. I've definitely lost a little bit of weight and I look a lot better/sexier/healthier now too

I've got my chronic physical issues more or less under control. Some weeks/months are better than others. I spent a lot of time this year trying to understand and fix my gut health and I can proudly say that a year ago I kinda thought I was going to die because of the terrible flare up I was experiencing, and today I have a pretty decent handle on it. January 2024 was the worst flare-up I've had in my life, and it has never approached that level since then. And it still flares up and it's awful when it does, but they're fewer and further between now, and they aren't nearly as painful or damaging. I'm really proud of how I've done the research and tried things until I found something that helps.

I have been strong and supportive and helpful as much as possible for my husband while he's been going through a lot of changes in his (and our!) life. I am so proud of him! It's been a crazy ride but it feels so good and I know he's got this, he's a fucking rockstar.

I have given so many new things chances this year. Specifically, new music. I've really allowed myself to be more open minded musically this year than I have in a very long time.

I have persevered this year. In so many ways. I have navigated lots of situations and always come out of it okay.

I have stuck up for myself. I have spoken up and stuck to my guns for what's right for me while also being proactive and trying new techniques and ideas to deal with my life issues. I have been assertive and I've spoken my thoughts and wants and feelings. Somtimes I have made big choices or changes and stuck to them even when others around me weren't huge fans of it.

I've gotten closer to truly loving myself. I'm still working on it though, but I made some big breakthroughs this year. I've put conscious effort into being more feminine and attracting more feminine energy to myself this year, and I've done a lot of reading/changing experimenting with different hair and makeup techniques and products and clothes this year!

I went to a Caribbean island (that alone is a first) and I saw so many more stars than I've ever seen in my life and I learned to boogie board and i started to realize that it's time to let go of that "I was raised as a prisoner" mentality that makes me forget that I'm a free, grown adult and I can do whatever I want. And I got the cutest little whale tail tan line! And I learned that my husband is more in tune with "the cosmos" (so to speak) than I gave him credit for.

I finally put some things into motion regarding some stuff around the house that has been bugging me for a while but I kept getting put off for whatever reason.

I was finally able to recognize the root of an issue I've had in my life on and off since I was 14, and accept it for what it is and make peace with it. It no longer obsessively plagues my thoughts as it did for many years, thank god!

I shyed away from fewer social engagements this year than I did last year (i think?) and I tried a little bit harder to make friends, or at the very least build some sort of personal familiarity with a few new people.

I was not perfect with it, but I made HUGE strides in my not abusing my stimulant meds journey. Yes I did indeed have slipup moments but I think overall I probably took the least total amount of stimulants in 2024, that I have since 2018.

[canichangemyblogname]

A collection of some of my favorite tags so far:

By @bucksboobs

9-1-1 is usually fairly heavy-handed in its telling of moral lessons. It's not a show that is hard to grasp, but people fall into one of two traps: making the show more complex (see: clothing color theory) than it is or complaining because the show doesn't approach moral resolution like a Disney Channel TV show. Y'know... something like: "Sorry I snapped at you earlier; I'm still upset over Dad leaving and took it out on you." << NO. As the featured poster said, Tommy is not going to come right out and say, "I was rude and insecure because I was closeted, and I utilized the privileges at my disposal, like being a man and white, to shield myself from homophobia." That's not going to happen, partly because it doesn't make good dialogue and partly because even those people who recognize these things don't really speak like that unless it's an academic setting. Like... that'd be something someone would write in an essay about identity in the closet, not say in casual conversation. But Tommy may say some variation of "I was insecure and afraid, and that brought out the worst in me," because he *does* say things like that, see: the conversation about how working under Gerrard did not make him a better person.

By @elizaisthetruehero

500%. I don't know how many times I want to scream from the rooftops, "YOU ARE NOT THE TARGET AUDIENCE." You know who is part of the target audience? My 80-year-old grandfather. He was one of the first coaches for a girl's high school team in the US following the introduction of Title IX. He believed in those girls and he aspired to train them to be able to keep up with any other team out there. I was his eldest granddaughter for most of my childhood, as well as the only grandchild willing to help him around the farm when his back got bad. I did a lot of heavy lifting, carrying, and pulling for him. He's aware that people a-f-a-b are plenty capable. But you know what he said to me about 9-1-1? "It's real cool they've got a lady fireman on the show. I never thought whether there are lady firemen." << That's the GA.

I feel like a lot of people don't remember what it was like in '05. That's not an excuse; it's an explanation. My grandfather was 62 in '05, around the same age Brian Earl Thompson (the man who plays Vincent Gerrard) is now. He was working in '05 when the country was in the midst of several huge cultural shifts, including many regarding LGBTQ+ rights. Even by 2010, things had improved, even if marginally so. The GA lived through these shifts.

So, not only does the GA remember working under those "old" conditions, but they also remember the changes characters like Hen, Athena, and Chim led. They remember the introduction of DEI programs. They remember the reaction their colleagues had to broader inclusion. Hell, maybe they had a less-than-stellar reaction. Some members of the GA have maybe come around, or maybe they've decided to stake everything on the past. I reckon that most members of the GA understand that not everyone is the same person their whole life and that 20 years makes a hell of a difference in who a person is.

Related to this point are the next tags I'm featuring:

By @unfuckablebogtroll

Another 500%. Hen and Chim have undeniably been a positive influence on the 118 and the work culture there. It's almost like... allowing deviation from a "norm" and empathy for beliefs or practices differing from or conflicting with one's own leads to... conditions that allow people to thrive. A diverse perspective is also crucial when it comes to saving lives. One's upbringing may provide them with more tact and understanding in certain circumstances that may be absent from others. It's important if we want to build an empathetic society.

There's a reason Gerrard is returning NOW, in 2024, as opposed to 2018 when the show aired. 1.) The character probably didn't exist in the writers' and producers' minds in 2018, but 2.) we are in the midst of another political, right-wing pushback to an inclusive and diverse society. There is a reactionary "anti-woke" movement sweeping through the US, led primarily by men like Gerrard who don't like the changes they've witnessed in schools or the workplace. The difference is? The landscape is very different now than nearly 20 YEARS AGO. Black people, immigrants, queer people, people of different religious and cultural backgrounds, etc... are far more common in the general workplace than in '05. These programs have worked, and they have filled every corner of the workplace with incredibly competent, capable people from varying backgrounds. We're now seeing very effective attempts to claw this back.

Stories do not exist in a vacuum. Gerrard doesn't just highlight how conditions and people have changed in the last 20 years, but who hasn't and why. This isn't the same 118, even if it is the same Gerrard.

By @disasterbisafespace

It would! Because you can grow and change, but that doesn't mean the people you hurt have an obligation to forgive you or let you into their lives. It seems Hen and Chim are both willing to break bread with him, so it would be interesting if they brought someone in to provide that example. Maybe an excuse to bring back Gino Anthony Pesi?

That's just fanon hope... nothing tangible.

I do want to add to a separate point about forgiveness:

It is clear who the fandom is willing to forgive and extend grace to and who they aren't. For example, they've been far more willing to extend Shannon grace for "mistakes" as a mother than Athena. They're also far more willing to extend Eddie grace for cheating on Marisol than Hen on Karen. They're more willing to extend Buck grace for his anger than Chim. They're more willing to forgive Bobby for the people he hurts when he's hurting than Tommy.

I've seen fans do a 180 on how they talk about Buck and his anger and rejection sensitivity following his coming out. @evansboyfriend can confirm that I got an anon who claimed that Buck having a crush on a man has made him more violent, re: Basketball game.

By @hiriaeth

Sir, a second "sassy" has hit the fandom.

Actually, no. The shippers in the 911 fandom who primarily complain about Tommy and his past don't actually care about Tommy's past or his actions that contributed to the previous toxic workplace environment and harassment at the 118. Not everything is about a fucking ship, believe it or not, yet the only time they bring up his behavior is in relation to shipping. And because the only time they bring up a valid critique of Tommy's character is during shipping "discourse," I'm convinced it's not brought forth in good faith. Finding a way to tie everything to a ship—especially things like racism and misogyny—is cheap and tasteless. Not everything is about "shipping;" shut up about the shipping.

I don't think they actually want to discuss how white queers contribute to the marginalization of others, including other queer people, by weaponizing the patriarchy and/or white supremacy in their favor because so many of them are fellow white queers themselves. They don't care about how Tommy inadvertently, because of his past, provides a realistic portrayal of how white queers divide or hurt the larger community because of an inability to find solidarity with people of a different background, culture, or race (especially if it would "inconvenience" them or if it does not directly benefit them, like Chim saving Tommy's life). White people would rather choose misery and isolation over standing with or up for non-white people. White people are generally not willing to put in the work to build community; they'd rather contribute to the system or fly under the radar to avoid being shunned by the structures they, and the Ol' Boys Club, benefit from, like white supremacy or the patriarchy. Most white queers would rather be complaisant, complacent, and complicit. It's the white queer's adherence to oppressive systems that divide the community, not people's calls to tear those systems down. And it's only the white queer who can change their perspective on this.

Tommy only has himself to blame for his jealousy and alienation from a supportive and familial community, and only he can take the steps to ameliorate the situation. Tommy was an absolute fucking dick to Chim and Hen, and that has had long-term consequences on his life. Only he can correct for his behavior. He contributed to a toxic work environment, referring to Chim as a Chinese takeout delivery man, actively participating in Chim's hazing, and telling Chim that he did not like the man (mostly because he didn't know him). He would later call Hen "bitchy," and the men of the 118 would leave the "domestic work" to her as they did Chim, actively contributing to her hazing. He did not (verbally) stand up for her, iced her out, and also contributed to a homophobic work culture that made same-sex attraction the butt of jokes. He contributed to this toxic culture to fly under the radar, and that directly hurt people he should have extended a hand to.

Unfortunately for most of the fandom, this is, ultimately, a show that loves stories about redemption and resolution. And there is actual, explicit (meaning, non-subtextual) evidence that Tommy has put in some work to remedy what he did and who he was (including being able to 1.] own up to his past actions, 2.] understand how he hurt others, 3.] recognize why he did what he did and how that it is an explanation, not an excuse, and 4.] begin to make amends or rectify the situation, like reporting Gerrard and changing his mind about Hen and Chim). Hen and Chim would not have invited him for drinks regularly if they thought he was "irredeemable." The 118 would not have thrown him a going away party if they disliked him. Chim would not call in favors from Tommy on more than one occasion or even describe him as "so cool" if they weren't—well—cool. Eddie wouldn't enjoy ring-side fights and basketball games with Tommy if he didn't enjoy the man's company. Tommy also clearly refers to the type of man he was in the past tense, implying change over time. It can be argued that he has not put in enough work, but that's not what's being argued. We're getting bad faith arguments that Hen, Chim, and Eddie hate Tommy or bad faith arguments where Tommy's past actions are only brought forth as some sort of "gotcha" when a fan prefers canon representation over homophobic fan fiction tropes. You don't have to like Tommy, but making up non-textual reasons to dislike him is absurd.

Tommy, as a character in a narrative, provides a lesson for the general audience (GA), the majority of whom are white. It's not just important to see queer people on screen; it's important to see white people learn and change and admit they were wrong. It's also important that the show—well—shows the GA that whiteness and man-ness affect people's perception, position, and treatment. Tommy isn't just a gay man; he is a white gay man, and this has had a direct impact on how he navigates the world and how the world interacts with him. Gerrard treats men like Sal and Tommy differently than men like Chim or women like Hen, and staying in Gerrard's good graces—like the good graces of oppressive power structures—requires one to conform to a very narrow definition of a "real man," like being straight, white, palatable (like... not kinky, not risqué, not queer, all the things the fandom seems to actually hate Tommy for), and not helping oust regressive figures from positions of authority for the way they treat your coworkers. The audience got to see how Tommy went from being the prodigal son to being openly mocked by men like Gerrard. And it's important to show the GA that someone can and will be happier if they go against the grain and that admiration from men like Gerrard means very little in the grand scheme. Tommy is happier now after having been "rebuked" by men like Gerrard than he was when he strove for their praise and acceptance.

It's also important to show that men like Gerrard and his beliefs belong in the past, even though they exist in the present. This is a network TV show. A non-zero number of men like Gerrard catch this show weekly. It is still important to show that Gerrard is not the "type" of man anyone should aspire to be. His beliefs and actions are not commendable, and the show is very heavy-handed about this. The show is going to once again compare Gerrard ("bad captain") and Bobby ("good captain") to show how Bobby has created a good legacy at the 118. It began this parallel with Bobby Begins Again, continued to reinforce Bobby's good legacy in Buck's coma arc, and then revisited how Bobby has had a positive influence on the lives of the 118 in his season 7 montage. Now, the show is going to compare and contrast him and Gerrard to reinforce how important Bobby is to those around him. The show will also continue its inadvertent parallels between Buck and Tommy, showing how Buck is a different man under similar circumstances because he has had good influences (re: Bobby, Hen, and Chim) in his life. Buck and Eddie's relationship was shaping up to be very similar to Tommy and Chim's relationship: oppositional because of one-sided disregard and dislike, but it didn't because they had a good influence: Bobby (given the rather... fucked timeline, Tommy was likely newer to the 118 when Chim joined and, like Buck, his hostility and posturing were also likely influenced by insecurity and a desire to secure his position at the table).

Most unfortunately for many, the show is also going to show how Tommy has changed due to the same influences (re: Bobby, Hen, and Chim). They wouldn't have re-introduced both Tommy and Gerrard and mentioned their dynamic on more than one occasion if they weren't going to do something with that. Season 7 set up Tommy's upcoming arc very nicely. He knows the man he was, he knows the man who shaped him into that, and he knows how and why that was wrong. We'll get Tommy confronting his obvious daddy issues, jealousy, and desire for community (and why he didn't get a family-like dynamic at the 118, re: Gerrard *and* Tommy's own behavior). Tommy has been explicit about this, literally telling Buck that he envies the relationship the people at the 118 have and mentioning that he was not a good person, and this played a part in why he didn't have the same rapport.

9-1-1 is not a perfect show, but it does reflect some of the positive changes of our time. It's important to see representations of comp-het—like Buck, Tommy, and Michael—and how it negatively impacts people's character or relationships, and then how they—the character—can amend that. It's important to see stories that depict how silence is complicity and how refusing to be silent—as Hen refused to be—makes change and changes minds. It's important that the show reminds the audience that Hen is a black lesbian and that this has impacted how people see her and treat her, but that she is just as capable, if not more so. This includes men like Chim. Because I see nearly none of the people who "critique" Tommy in the name of "shipping" ever bring up how Chim has leaned on the patriarchy for support and a position at the table. He may have been the kindest to Hen, but he was by no means normal about women. And it is important to see how non-white men benefit from the patriarchy even as they are victimized by white supremacy. It's also important that the show shows the GA that non-white men are not affected by white supremacy equally, as Michael and Harry have had discussions about blackness and police brutality, a conversation that Chim is never going to have to have with his children, but that doesn't mean that Chim won't have to one day have a discussion with Jee-Yun about how and why some people treat her differently.

But the fandom approaches everything in a very... Catholic way. They don't approach this from the view that people can change and should be pushed to change; rather, they shun people like they've been marked by original sin. The structures we live under have deeply affected each and every one of our worldviews. "You are not immune to the propaganda" includes your personal philosophies and ideologies as well as the things you were taught since you were a child, consciously and "subconsciously." But, people would rather condemn everyone else as "irredeemable" than look critically at their own behavior out of fear of being "one of the bad ones." They'd rather *not* accept the fact that everyone has learning and changing to do as that would reflect upon them, too. This leads to being very resistant to being told that you're mistaken, you've hurt others, or that your behavior and beliefs contribute to repressive, dangerous, or toxic ideas (and we've seen a lot of that; y'all do not create safe online spaces). This leads to a lack of personal change as well as a lack of change at the interpersonal level because rather than teach or challenge, they stick up their nose and turn the other way. "Their barbaric bigotry; my enlightened neglect."

So, really, they've learned nothing from a character like Tommy.

[dangaer]

           he can remember, recall, the previous times she has questioned him with this, asked what to do next, but none have managed to leave him as lost as she does in this moment, left his resolution as unsteady as the river that rocks the boat in tandem. he wonders if she sees him, the demon who had cursed them all once his fingers wrapped so tightly around her throat / the demon who she fell in love with despite such a confession leaving his throat / the demon who had watched it happen again and again with a mist in his eyes and grief in his throat when she turned away, to his brothers, to his royalty, to anywhere but their home. it shouldn't matter to him he supposes; there remain wounds that time won't fix and those in which remain his own fault, those that have scabbed over and those he thought covered until her words exposed them all. maybe it's his own fault, for encroaching on sins that weren't his own / maybe nothing would have changed if it was him or someone else's cruel soul.

❛  then why won't you stay here? just thinking about you gravitating to another soul is enough to drive me crazy. ❜ the first few times they found themselves in this space, standing side by side without any clue from his persona of how they were supposed to wake up. when he had become her murderer, her regretful killer, her final image as his fingers pressed into her throat with the full intention of making her humanities martyr, to bear the sins of ones she had never met in any lifetime. he told her this, that, before; he's not sure how much longer he can take her passing, how much longer he can cope seeing the path converse around somewhere else. it's been spoken countless times before yet he cannot blame her for forgetting with every time her clock resets, can only hope that every time further brings a sense of deja vu, a reminder of how truthful he's been before.

❛  i'm not my brothers, but you make me understand their sins. someone who makes me prideful to have yet greedy to want more, a glutton to your love yet envious to anything that felt it before me. my lust and wrath, well ... ❜ he presses his lips to her own once more, presses his fingers against the familiar notches of her throat; he wonders how blindly she must trust him to allow him to fall into old habits, feels what he imagines to be a hitch of breath from her lips; ah, it's obvious why. he lets go as quick as he grips tight, traces his fingers amidst the marks he knows won't linger tomorrow. he can't say he doesn't expect it but part of him remains secure enough to live in the mirror of their own desires, if just for a few seconds. to ignore the ache, burn within his chest that lights up with the reminder that she loves him, this, in all the ways he'd dreamed.

in their dream ━ well, he knows it remains both a blessing and a curse.

❛  i love you. i always will love you, how can that give us our happy ending? why is it you who is being punished with death like lilith, why do i have to play the role the human did? ❜ a pause, the boat rocks and one of his arms wrap around her waist, despite how easy it is to settle. ❛  it's not easy, but it has never changed the way i feel about you. isn't that enough to stop them from punishing you with my sins, to give you something that keeps you living something longer? i want you happy, and - i want you by my side until it becomes my turn to go. that wouldn't be too bad, would it? just you, me and my brothers. what else do we need? ❜

❛  ... whatever you want to do, i suppose i won't mind. just don't get my hopes up too high, even i have a limit to the amount of excitement i can take each day. ❜ ' it'd be fine whatever you pick ', he doesn't move his body but rather his gaze, irises dropping for a mere moment down to her lips and he wonders how many times more he'll get to kiss them, what they'll look like come the end of this turn. ❛  even if it's just in here, let me live in the fantasy that this time will be the case. there is nothing more painful than the knowledge of watching someone you love simply go. ❜ never has been, in the end. / @redemptioninterlude cont'd!

[opinionated-rants]

These are simply some thoughts I'm musing over as I rest today. As I sip my coffee and watch the news, my mind races, processing the multitude of issues unfolding both in our country and abroad—hence, these ramblings. I'm not seeking a critique on grammar, so if that's your focus, feel free to scroll past.

Dear America:

The entire United States is currently experiencing widespread unrest, with every city grappling with skyrocketing homelessness rates. Just seven months into 2023, major cities have already witnessed over 200 mass shootings. Moreover, the rampant use of drugs, including Fentanyl, Heroin, TranQ, Meth, among others, is a pervasive issue in every city. It seems empathy is in decline, with an increasing prevalence of narcissistic behaviors observed today.

It's crucial to understand that the responsibility for the current state of the country doesn't solely lie with Democrats or Republicans, but rather with everyone collectively. Elected officials, teachers, parents—all have roles to play. Instead of laying blame, we need to start holding individuals accountable for their actions. Instead of fostering division, we should work to unite people. We must emphasize and teach values like responsibility, accountability, confidence, and honesty, to bring about meaningful change.

We should remember that all of these religions, whether it's Baha'i, Buddhism, Christianity, Confucianism, Hinduism, Islam, Jainism, Judaism, Shinto, Sikhism, Taoism, or Zoroastrianism, have teachings that promote peace, understanding, and unity. These values can serve as guiding principles in times of crisis and conflict.

Amid the unrest in places in the United States, France, and Ukraine, Israel, Gaza it's crucial for everyone, regardless of their location, to advocate for peace and non-violence. Reacting to violence with more violence simply perpetuates a destructive cycle. Instead, we must strive for dialogue, understanding, and cooperation, to de-escalate tension and create a space for resolution.

Regardless of your religious belief, be it Baha'i, Buddhism, Christianity, Confucianism, Hinduism, Islam, Jainism, Judaism, Shinto, Sikhism, Taoism, or Zoroastrianism, the recent riots and shootings highlight the need for prayers and support for places like Washington DC, all of our States and countries of the world, France, Ukraine, Gaza, Palestinians, Israel. It's important to remember that violence only breeds more violence; responding to these actions with additional violence does not resolve anything, but instead escalates the situation further.

The weakening of our country is not a recent development; it has been a gradual process over several years. As a nation, we have become less robust and resilient. This decline is partly due to the common tendency to place blame on others, rather than taking personal responsibility for the issues at hand. Collectively, we've allowed a culture of emotional weakness to take root. As a society, we've become prone to passing quick judgments and assigning blame hastily. It's essential that we introspect and recognize our own role in these circumstances.

So, let's take a moment to pray, according to our individual beliefs, for all nations, not just the United States, or for just one country. Pray for all.

#PrayForAmerica #prayfortheworld #Israel #Palestinians

[soulful-thoughts-and-ramblings]

These are simply some thoughts I'm musing over as I rest today. As I sip my coffee and watch the news, my mind races, processing the multitude of issues unfolding both in our country and abroad—hence, these ramblings. I'm not seeking a critique on grammar, so if that's your focus, feel free to scroll past.

Dear America:

The entire United States is currently experiencing widespread unrest, with every city grappling with skyrocketing homelessness rates. Just seven months into 2023, major cities have already witnessed over 200 mass shootings. Moreover, the rampant use of drugs, including Fentanyl, Heroin, TranQ, Meth, among others, is a pervasive issue in every city. It seems empathy is in decline, with an increasing prevalence of narcissistic behaviors observed today.

It's crucial to understand that the responsibility for the current state of the country doesn't solely lie with Democrats or Republicans, but rather with everyone collectively. Elected officials, teachers, parents—all have roles to play. Instead of laying blame, we need to start holding individuals accountable for their actions. Instead of fostering division, we should work to unite people. We must emphasize and teach values like responsibility, accountability, confidence, and honesty, to bring about meaningful change.

We should remember that all of these religions, whether it's Baha'i, Buddhism, Christianity, Confucianism, Hinduism, Islam, Jainism, Judaism, Shinto, Sikhism, Taoism, or Zoroastrianism, have teachings that promote peace, understanding, and unity. These values can serve as guiding principles in times of crisis and conflict.

Amid the unrest in places in the United States, France, and Ukraine, it's crucial for everyone, regardless of their location, to advocate for peace and non-violence. Reacting to violence with more violence simply perpetuates a destructive cycle. Instead, we must strive for dialogue, understanding, and cooperation, to de-escalate tension and create a space for resolution.

Regardless of your religious belief, be it Baha'i, Buddhism, Christianity, Confucianism, Hinduism, Islam, Jainism, Judaism, Shinto, Sikhism, Taoism, or Zoroastrianism, the recent riots and shootings highlight the need for prayers and support for places like Baltimore, France, and Ukraine. It's important to remember that violence only breeds more violence; responding to these actions with additional violence does not resolve anything, but instead escalates the situation further.

The weakening of our country is not a recent development; it has been a gradual process over several years. As a nation, we have become less robust and resilient. This decline is partly due to the common tendency to place blame on others, rather than taking personal responsibility for the issues at hand. Collectively, we've allowed a culture of emotional weakness to take root. As a society, we've become prone to passing quick judgments and assigning blame hastily. It's essential that we introspect and recognize our own role in these circumstances.

So, let's take a moment to pray, according to our individual beliefs, for all nations, not just the United States.

#PrayForAmerica #PrayForBaltimore #prayfortheworld