#though that would be so mUCH more complicated lmao
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toffeebrew · 6 months ago
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DON'T KILL ME PLEASE!!! i think i have some unpopular opinions in there so-also i don't hate any ships (aside from the ones listed) at worst i feel neutral about them!!
another big disclaimer: I do realize this could be very wrong haha i don't know everything about these aus and I don't claim my opinions to be correct or in anyway canon.
i would love to explain the reasoning for all of them heheh (also ngl only know like... maybe half of these aus more than surface level so most of this was based off vibes alone. im not doing research for all the aus just for this chart im sorry LMAOO)
sorry bad sanses enjoyers 😭
Ship chart from:
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Blank chart:
(remember to credit or ill skin you! joking but do credit)
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reenaria · 1 year ago
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currently having a queer identity crisis on this accursed holiday
#but actually. i’ve realized that like. 95% or more of my attraction to men has been comphet#i thought it wasn’t because i’ve been more or less identifying as bi since i was 11#so like. i figured if i didn’t like men at all i would’ve figured it out sooner?#it wasn’t until a couple years ago that i resolved to stop dating straight & masculine guys because i feel like i’m performing for them#and my current partner of 2.5 years is amab and socially perceived as a man but he’s bi and sees himself as ‘void of gender’#which is also the way i see him but not the way most people see him#he does get mistaken for a woman a fair ammount though. which brings us both a lot of joy lol#but anyway. my crisis is that i’ve been feeling more and more detached from the bi label because i feel like it implies attraction to men#and i’ve known for a little while now that i’m almost exclusively attracted to femininity and androgyny#and primarily attracted to women in general#like if i weren’t with my partner i would 100% be out there dating women and maybe? identifying as a lesbian#but i feel like i have no claim to that label especially with my current partner who is not a woman and is much more androgynous than fem#idk. do i keep calling myself bi? it feels like i’ve slipped away from it#i’ve been using queer a lot more lately because umbrella terms are the only thing that seem to make sense to me anymore#i know labels can be super complicated and unhelpful in some cases but i also want to know where my place is in the community ya know?#i feel so confused without a solid label and it’s causing me a lot more stress than it should#(also my partner is such a blessing and said he’d be supportive if i ever felt i needed to leave him to be with women)#(like he said ‘i’d be sad for a while but i’d still be your best friend) and i was just 🥺#this may be even longer than my last tag novel lmao i just hate the idea of putting this stuff in the body of the post#anyway if any pals/mutuals read all that and have any insight or advice i’d be curious to hear#reena.txt
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lilacstro · 3 months ago
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my personal opinions on your big 3: your sun, moon, rising
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paid readings open xoxo
support me on ko-fi :)
I was remembering the time when I was 10 years old and used to read those astrology posts that said things like "zodiacs in school", "what does your sun sign do when bored" and I wanted to make a less complicated, fun post just like that but wanted it to still be in accordance to people I have seen so far, so expect this post to be more fun and very not serious and rather light hearted, so here we goooo so since it is like so, please scroll past if you do not resonate :) I would be posting more serious stuff kind of what i learnt from my diploma the following week if possible, luv you<3
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Aries
Sun: You guys are so full of passion omg. Sun is really powerful here and you guys actually shine, so passionate and full of energy. Every Aries Sun I have seen befriends anyone within 5 cm radius to them and has a very extroverted energy. If you are close to them, they will make sure to fight for you and protect you for sure.
Moon: Chaotic emotions and restless, but this restlessness always leads to some kind of creation. The types who work out to release pent up energy. It is possible you guys keep on discarding and making new habits and do not stick to one. Very destructive if provoked, especially emotionally
Rising: Beautiful people. You guys are likely to have a intense energy and aura around. Unlike Aries Sun, many Aries risings could be reserved at times. I think you are the people everyone is afraid of to participate along with in any competition because you scream this energy of "competitive, I am gonna win you see" without even trying!
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Taurus
Sun: LORD YALL ARE SO CHILL, but probably sometimes way to chill and turn ice, I mean not ice cold(yes if you are annoyed by someone lmao) but sometimes may become too boring in the sense that you may not want to do crazy things, you like stable, calm energy. The types to watch a movie, or do some art when they are bored. ALSO VERY STUBBORN but also not mad easily but if mad really really angry. ALSO yall are so beautiful and elegant without even trying
Moon: This archetype is the mother in zodiacs. But you guys indeed if once emotionally connected to someone, would make sure they are well fed and had 8 hours of sleep and make sure they are feeling ok while having 10 mental breakdowns. Also, you guys can hold more grudges than Taurus Suns and Mars, and can sometimes or maybe most of the times be unwilling to change opinions.
Rising: Gorgeous Gorgeous people, who are a little shy at first and once comfortable, everything else, whatever that is, comes out. You guys are actually really good at cooking and also, even though Taurus is the sign of wealth and stability, I have seen many Taurus risings be good with money until its the time to spend on something they like, they spend crazy lmao. Very comfortable energy around you, make other people comfortable once they are.
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Gemini
Sun: Do you want to know Gossips? Ask your Gemini Suns, I bet they know a new one from 10 minutes ago. They are updated fast on drama than most google sites. Also, they have pure crackhead energy no doubt, but they can carry a conversation so well and talk about anything you want, even though might have no idea about it
Moon: Crackhead energy once again. If you want a good time and do not take things seriously or do not get offended easily, go to your Gemini Moon friends, they indeed say the most out of pocked things at times, but they are very funny. But if you are serious and want to have serious conversation, it is 9/10 chances that you would not be taken much seriously, since anything that is boring distracts gemini moons to zone out, so they probably heard you half and would comment on that half info without asking you to repeat because they do not want to listen again lmaooo But for the 1/10 times they listen seriously, they offer really good and short and simple advice.
Rising: These people are like chameleon to me, I mean they adapt so well to wherever they are and who they with. They also are very hard to recognize since they come in all different beauty and styles and aesthetics. Very good conversationalists once again and always seem to be talking about something or to someone, never really idle. Good at texting and probably post many selfies on social media.
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Cancer
Sun: GOD you all are so innocent and cute until someone really gets to see past that lmao, or I may rather say, you let someone see. For some reason you guys always have your guards up, but you are good at fooling people by making them think they probably have seen all your cards, especially in terms of what you are really capable of. Most cancer suns I have seen, regardless of whatever kind of relationship they may have with their moms, they seek their validation somehow.
Moon: Very intuitive and sensitive to emotions, especially of other peoples. Really good at understanding others and healing them, they are really soft people honestly. They are again very unlikely to show you your feelings and emotions, but somehow would see yours. Very nurturing and caring, especially emotionally. Your comfort friends who treat you with ice cream and listen to your sob story.
Risings: Wonderful people, very kind and loving and caring. I have often seen Cancer risings are very keen on making people around them feel seen and heard and cared for, they carry so much charm in them. Very down to earth, and they are always willing to listen. Very emotional people like all Cancer placements and very empathetic, would try their best to make you feel warm and they do it so well that people can let their guards down and connect to them, probably even spill their secrets.
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Leo
Sun: SHOW STOPPERS. So charismatic, and even if they are not loud like most leos, there is a 9.9/10 chance that you have atleast seen them once or heard about them once it is impossible that you are not aware about their existence. They usually like attention and validation from other people, but if no one would do that, they do it themselves and then other people reflect that energy back and yeah...the cycle never ends. I do know that people say Leo Suns are selfish and egoistic, while that maybe true on some level, they are really good at making people feel confident and worthy and also very generous.
Moon: 9/10 Leo moons I have seen have some kind of egoic validation and connection related to their mother. They are likely to be people who are "mumma's girls/boys" because until and unless they feel their moms validation, they would not proceed. Cancer Moons are like so too, but somewhat less than Leo Moons. Also, very possible that you are the oldest, or you act like the oldest. Very charming people though. If they are introverted, their energy is loud and charismatic without even trying, and if they are outgoing, then it is visible and double charismatic of how they are able to validate their emotions and act on them, be verbal about it. BUT BUT sometimes or I may say, most, you guys are really dramatic when hurt and high on emotions. You cannot stand being ignored I knowwww.
Rising: Um how do I say it. Leo suns are bright bright sun, Leo moons are golden enveloped kind of shiny, while Leo risings have a halo on their head and back. I mean it is an energy that you look at and feel drawn to, you do not force yourself like wanting to see the Sun in the eyes but you just see them somehow, they have a warmth around them. Usually very outgoing, great sense of style, and befriend people easily. Although all Leo placements are comfortable to put a fight, Leo risings would especially are not afraid either, especially if they feel the challenge at themselves or hurt at the ego. They are usually very kind and I have seen trust people easily irdk why. They often try to direct their light on other people and try to shine them along. Though, I sometimes see such people dimming their own light to get along with others. Generous people at hearts.
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Virgo
Sun: You guys are the ones who are so serious about the next exam 2 months in advance, probably even before the exams are announced. Very critical of themselves, usually very introspective and rather quiet and even if you are outgoing, it is ambiverted, you are not in someone's face lmao. Very organized and may tie their worth to studies and grades, and their friends too, often. YOU GUYS DO NOT LIKE INTERUPTIONS IN PLANS LMAO
Moon: Logic with emotions, you do not let things hurt you until you have processed the feelings mentally. Your feelings do not go to the heart directly, it first goes to the mind and then you decide if you can make sense out of it, which most of the times you cannot, so you hurt your head with brainstorming as an extra with your heart. It feels like you guys have compartments in your head, and you put those memories and feelings in each so you can pull them up asap when needed to retrieve. Usually good at following routines and structures and like predictability in some form. If they are not in a clean or organized they do not feel good, whatever that means to them, whether that means trash in their room or floors so clean you see your face
Rising: Beautiful people yet again. Look very youthful and young. Really work oriented, and would really really want that they be seen and recognized at work/school for their efforts or can feel upset otherwise. They say and do things in exact manner, no less no more and usually avoid fuss and drama. Like showing up in a rather neat and clean, minimalistic manner than being more big and bold, all with their appearance and emotions and words. Just like Virgo Moons, these people like clean places especially and cannot handle unhygienic people and places at all. The types to be careful with spellings at school and work and while texting and maybe avoid emojis or use wrong ones.
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Libra
Sun: I think the more you guys like justice and harmony, most Libra Suns I have seen have rather disbalanced scales are WILD, but the justice is indeed super important when it comes down to them ahem ahem. I also see you guys put great efforts in wanting to be liked by people often, and sometimes if not all, would try to make efforts to do that. Usually very charming and friendly and would even make a beautiful smile on their face for their worst enemy in social settings rather than letting people know they hate them. They can hate many people honestly, but with you, you are the best one and the most special person ever, behind your back, idk depends vastly honestly, so if you ever confided in a Libra Sun because of their nice nature in the 1st meeting, good luck babe!
Moons: I think Libra Moons are very nice again and do all the nice talking to make you comfortable but they are actually most justice oriented and fair than Libra Suns. Their mood can actually depend on how good they look honestly. Also very kind and nice and usually would say the things someone would blow up on your face for in the nicest manner idk how do they have so much patience. Also they have a silent charisma to them often I have seen. They again are nice to everyone and never really blow up even when the scales are highly unbalanced or I may say, unless the scales are trashed :D
Risings: AH SUPER CHARISMATIC. Very lovely people. And super attractive I must say, and I would say effortlessly idk how. If I could describe libra risings by one color I would say pastel pink idk every thing about them screams aesthetic and pretty, their aura is usually very fun and uplifting and it is unlikely they take any kind romance they have ignited in people by their words and charisma to be taken seriously. Popular people, liked by everyone kind of placement. I mean they can be worst people too but atleast from far and in the first glance, it is highly unlikely you would be able to guess.
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Scorpio
Sun: I would say they are either of extremes, either you have never seen or heard from them are they are one of the mysteries of the world and super quiet or they are LOUDDDDDDD there is no in between and regardless, these people have some kind of charm and I would say MAGNET in them. They can be the most toxic people (they are not, tho there are exceptions) but you would still feel attracted to them idk why would be that so, but it would be like that most of the times. Also sometimes I have seen these people often cannot stay in friend groups for too long even if they tried to, some kind of drama would always happen if there is a friend with Scorpio Sun in the group because these people are actually super sensitive, though I never say its a bad things. I have seen whenever I simply hear or even sit near a frustrated or jealous or angry Scorpio Sun I feel a certain kind of vibe to them. It feels like heaty and heavy I cannot explain. But yeah strong emotional reactions, even if quiet or even if someone else is narrating it, I can know it was a Scorpio Sun idk how. Very territorial and possessive and if they know someone did their friend wrong they better fear lives but it only happens when they feel close to you or vice versa and that happens super rare....But once they decide they really want to keep you, it is a long friendship.
Moons: Tough, Strong people. They are brave and fight the worst adversities that are thrown on them. Their emotions change them in the sense that before going through anything they would sense a storm is about to come, and their emotions would adapt to the change before their mind and body. Really good at reading people and the room and understanding your deepest, most unexplainable feelings as if they have experienced every kind of emotion possible. Usually psychic, intuitive and empathetic. Could often dream about the past and can have troubles breaking mental patterns especially if they are harmful in some way.
Risings: They remind me of the black and white filter honestly idk why. I think I can say most scorpio risings are not as loud or outgoing, they can be fun and wild but they usually have an intimidating aura, I would say more intimidating that Sun and Moons. Often seen them have shadows on their face, and also, sleepy eyes like they do not seem intoxicated exactly but their eyes are not wide awake normal like most people. You can never know them honestly, just like any scorpio placement and they can merge into the background if they wanna hide and you would not know. They are the friends who respond to your texts 2 months later or are out of reach every 2 months. Never consistent on social media or never post is one more thing.
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Sagittarius
Sun: AH VERY BLUNT LMAO. Most Sag Suns I have met are very blunt especially if they are comfortable with you or your friend. Always have a world of their own, maybe they have occupied their mind in some movie or drama or maybe they are busy creating some art or lost in their day dreams they are not really present in the current world and I guess that is why they have energy, especially physical energy I must say. Every Sag Sun I have seen has liked dancing at one point and always has some kind of engagement outside their own culture, be it supporting a sports team different from their own country or being invested in some other culture's movies and entertainment.
Moon: Sag Moons I know sometimes seem to have problems in understanding other people's emotions because theirs are so big and expanded that they cannot really see it for other people. I have seen Sag Moons are often the kinds of people to develop an affinity for some kind of place or person they have never met very easily. They are actually very dramatic just like Leo Moons honestly but different in the sense that it takes longer for them to see things clearly I feel. Usually very optimistic and motivating and very hopeful for the future. The most bold and big actions they take are when they are impulsive because of high emotions I have seen.
Risings: AH I do not know why but Sag risings are very beautiful, yes, beautiful. Literally. Such a beauty to them, even if they may not be conventionally or beauty standard pretty, they feel beautiful. These kinds of people who you sit with for 10 minutes and they say the most life changing things in a single line without even them realizing, maybe while doing random things and they do not even realize it. Always wanting to travel or connect with other cultures, more proactively than other people I feel.
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Capricorn
Sun: I do not know but every Capricorn sun I have seen has a vibe of "do not touch me you peasant" or "no thanks, do not wanna hear your good morning I have a business meeting" and this is when you would be seeing them at lunch in the cafeteria, probably even in high school irdk. A serious persona and appeal idk they also seem mysterious for some reason and feel like they are unwilling to talk, its a hard and confusing energy. Also you can be their friend for years and you do not really know if they are your friend. I think the best way to know if a Capricorn Sun is your friend is when you see them respond to your texts in time, give you their time and energy. And if a Capricorn sun is spending money on you, I feel you are really serious for them lmao
Moon: STOICS. You can never read them. They will never tell you about their emotions even after they die, especially if they have specially decided not to. They hold their emotions back, and often wait for some kind of time or opportunity, which does not make it better but probably worse since the jist of the emotions and when was the right time to say was probably gone. If you are a Capricorn Moon, please tell your crush you like them before they have 10 grandkids. ALSO, you guys are good in this sense that you do not disassociate at worst emotional pressures and dramas and never act out on your emotions no matter how DRAMATIC AND INTENSE the situation is so you never really make a fool of yourself actually.
Risings: AH Capricorn risings, they are actually elites, or they feel like that. They have that serious and "do not waste my time if you have nothing important to say" kind of look. Very savage and people fear you for some reason and your intensity and seriousness is not something you try to do, its just silently felt lmao. The kind of friend in the friend group where after cracking a joke people see if you laughed, and if you did not, they feel they messed up and even if you did, they ask you if you were not offended lmao. Good people to go to for taking serious advices/conversations they have capacity for that.
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Aquarius
Sun: Honestly I cannot even lie anymore, I have never seen an Aquarius who does not has completely, completely different and sometimes, even concerning views on the most common things and they are actually proud of it and its crazy. You wanna compete with your Aquarius Sun friend in what most weird things have happened to you, you cant actually LMAO. Also, most Aqua Suns can have really good emotional intelligence in understanding other people, but themselves. Always aware on what is happening in the world, and also, good with internet and computers. Kind and Generous at hearts<3 Also idk why do most of them speak with a lot of pauses in between.
Moon: I have seen 9/10 times people with Aquarius Moons have some very weird relationship with their mother. Either she is absent but not absent really, and she loves you but does not love you idk. I also feel as a child you could have been the weired one, the one people tried to tame but in the end YOU are the one who ends up doing something completely different from their family and usually succeed (especially if you do it consistently and do not get a superior complex in between) I have often seen regardless of how good and bad it is, these natives are always distant from their family emotionally, and more connected to their grandparents than their own parents. Usually people you can share anything with! and they take their friends very seriously I have seen.
Rising: Aquarius risings I have seen are mostly active on social media, and are very likely not posting themselves but rather posts on geopolitics, or maybe poetry or maybe something that people would find relatable. They also seem to be people who make you comfortable being weird around them without even trying. It is like you can say something really quirky or weird around them that people would probably make faces at you for, but they would respond genuinely without judgement lmao. Very friendly and welcoming to all kinds of people and as a result have a very colorful friend group.
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Pisces
Sun: Very sweet people and usually very introverted but they are always occupied and they are always doing something, especially artistic or musical. Most Pisces Suns I know are actually really good at artistic stuff. The types to doodle at the back of their notebook, or zone out in classes. They are usually very kind but actually very sensitive. Also even if you probably bother them, they would not say much but if you bother someone they feel protective about then that is another thing. Very emotional. Random but I have often seen these people confuse romantic and platonic love they feel, so I do not know if I would say they are emotionally intelligent in that way.
Moon: Pisces Moons I know really really connect to music, or do music in some shape or forms. Really artistic. Also, I would not like to be awful and generalizing, but out of Sun and Rising, Pisces Moons are in their feels really easily. They attach themselves to things and people super easily as well. Apart from Sag Moons, Pisces Moons are also able to attach themselves to people and places they never seen and even dream about them. But they actually have really intense connections to their imaginations are fully emotionally invested in their hopes and dreams, even the ones they see in sleep. Really good at manifesting. idk but Pisces Moons are also good at lying and also making up real emotions when they need to, its like their super power.
Risings: I personally have never known a Pisces rising. But I would talk from what I have seen so yeah. First of all regardless of gender, people with Pisces rising have some kind of feminine look to them, like how do I explain, like pretty white stars shining on them. I feel most Pisces risings, at some point in their life, have been really gullible. I also feel Pisces rising really do have two completely different. opposite sides to them, now if is apparent to them or people is one other thing. Good at artsy stuff and have really good skin. Really beautiful, probably a little downturned eyes, it looks like their eyes have stars and dreams and hopes in them, and this is something I have seen be constant. Idk for some reason it feels they somehow always carry their past with them and probably never really show their vulnerable side
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typing this broke my hands lol
i love you all
leave suggestions in the asks
xoxo
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wife-of-all-dilfs · 11 months ago
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Hii! I love love love all of your finnick fics! Could I please request a fic where reader is also a victor from an earlier game and she is in an established relationship with Finnick. They both get reaped (not the same district) for the 75th games and reader gets critically hurt in the part where the cornucopia spins. Like she falls into the water after maybe being injured and she can’t swim, so Finnick has to risk everything to save her life.
I’m really looking for like a hurt/comfort with a seriously injured reader and Finnick going through hell to save her because he cannot imagine a life without her in it.
Thank you so much if you’re willing to write this or something like it, feel free of course to change anything to your liking!
two souls, one heart | f. odair
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masterlist
summary: finnick refuses to lose the love of his life. your inability to swim complicates things, especially when the cornucopia begins spinning.
pairing: finnick odair x fem!reader
warnings: pre-established relationship, heavy angst, drowning, death, bone fracture
notes: thank you so much!!! i really enjoyed writing this, shed a few tears but still enjoyed it lmao. listen to 'beginning of the end movement v' by the newton brothers on repeat for the full experience <3
A quiet nursery rhyme was being sung by the water's edge.
The calm waves around the Cornucopia lapped at the rocks, the blistering sun causing the surface to sparkle. Wiress' voice interrupted Peeta as he mapped out the arena's clock-like wedges in the dirt. Everyone was focused on the map; you should have been too.
Dark blue ripples had your eyes captivated. So tranquil. So hauntingly beautiful. Loving the sea was in your blood, as your District Four was your home. You would think coming from a fishing district would mean your swimming abilities were mastered. In reality, they were practically non-existent. No matter how many times Finnick had attempted to give you lessons, they never stuck.
Neither of you seemed to care though, always too enraptured by simply being in each other's company—feeling Finnick's hands support your body as you floated on the surface...
"Don't you let go of me, Finnick Odair, or I swear to god I'll drown you."
"Will that be before or after you drown first?" he chuckled, though ultimately tightening his grip on your body in an attempt to reassure you.
....hysterically laughing when he got wiped out by a sudden wave...
"No way! I can't—" You broke into a fit of laughter— "I can't believe that just happened!"
"Are you laughing at me, sweetheart?" Finnick asked, trudging through the water towards you, his hair drenched and swept across his forehead.
"Yes!"
You doubled over, knees buckling as you struggled to contain your laughter. Despite trying to put up a serious front, Finnick too let a few chuckles slip at the hysterical sight of you.
"Oh really?"
Just like that, his arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you down into the cold water, earning him a squeal just before you crashed together below the surface.
...and washing up on the sandy shore in each other's arms, salty lips capturing one another.
"I'm covered in sand," you murmured against Finnick's lips.
He gave you another kiss before pulling away. "It's okay," he said, pecking your lips again. "I'll help you wash off in the shower when we get back." And then sent you a stomach-flipping grin.
Even though you wouldn't trade those memories for the world, if you had known your life would soon depend on the ability to swim, you would have paid much more attention to the lessons.
Finnick stood closely beside you, his trident digging into the dirt as he gripped it tightly in case of an attack. He had noticed your drifted attention, observing the way your eyes stared at the rippling water, like death was lurking just beneath the surface waiting to drag you down to the murky depths.
He could protect you from most things in the arena, but fear was something entirely different. A trident couldn't defeat the darkness in your mind.
A hand slid onto your lower back, rubbing gentle strokes to gain your attention. Your gaze tore from the blinding blue and settled onto Finnick's face beside you, watching his mouth curve into a light smile. You knew the silent words he was trying to convey: 'You're okay, sweetheart. I've got you.'
For a fleeting moment, the anxiety had disappeared. How could anything ever go wrong with Finnick by your side? The corners of your mouth quirked, preparing to send him a smile in response. But it never came. Something new had caught your attention. The woman by the water was no longer singing.
Wiress had been murdered.
The second Katniss let her arrow fly into Gloss' chest, everything around you seemed to explode into action. Anything that could go wrong would go wrong—Murphy's Law. And it did.
The Careers had initiated an attack.
Charging forward from the waterside was Cashmere, determined to avenge her brother's death. Instinct quickly kicked in and the spear in your hand was sent barrelling through the air and into her chest. As you watched her body slump to the ground, an enraged yell came from the side.
Finnick was fighting Brutus.
With your only weapon lodged within Cashmere's chest, aiding Finnick was impossible. Enobaria revealed herself beside Brutus, displaying her vicious fangs and throwing a dagger that sliced a small cut across Finnick's shoulder. Though the wound was minor, your heart lurched as he cried out in pain.
Before a single thought in your brain could form, your legs were moving. Not towards Finnick, but after Enobaria. Remember who the real enemy is—screw that. Finnick could have died. Your Finnick. He called out your name, his voice hoarse and frayed, but you continued on, hatred fuelling each step. It seemed Katniss and Johanna had the same idea, following behind you with their weapons bared.
Salt water sprayed onto your face, but you paid it no attention. Nor did you notice as the jungle surrounding the island began to blur into one overwhelming hue of green. Only when your body was thrown to the harsh rocky terrain did you realise what was happening.
The Cornucopia had started to spin.
Nothing could compare to the terror you felt as gravity's merciless force dragged your body toward the violent waves surging against the rocks. Just as your lower legs breached the edge, a hand grabbed onto your own. Katniss. She too was hanging onto Johanna whose only lifeline was an axe buried in the rocks.
A moment—that was all you were given to scan your surroundings. Supplies and sharp-edged weapons were flying everywhere. White water was spraying into the air. Finnick, who was thirty feet away, was gripping onto a rock ledge whilst keeping Beetee from sliding into the furious waves. His head turned to the side and even from a great distance, your eyes met.
It was at that moment you knew, you just knew the odds weren't going to be in your favour. God forbid you lived a simple happy life with the man you loved, days spent together on a calm beach. God forbid the Gamemakers gave you one last chance to be in his arms. God forbid you survived.
And with that sudden realisation, the universe, sick as it was, decided it was time.
Your hand began slipping from Katniss's; an unseen tear fell from your eye, and you smiled. A smile of goodbye sent to the love of your life. His face contorted into one of agony, lips moving but you couldn't hear his voice over the roaring waves. Still, you knew exactly what he was shouting.
"NO! NO!"
There was nothing he could do but watch your body disappear into the waves, repeating over and over "no, no, no," and praying his cruel eyes had deceived him. They hadn't.
Dark blue was in every direction you looked. The undertow tossed and rolled your body like a ragdoll in a washing machine and despite your attempts to swim, the surface only seemed to be slipping further and further out of your reach. Darkness engulfed you, so thick that you couldn't tell which way was up or down. That was when the panic set in.
Your arms and legs thrashed frantically, struggling against the water's force, desperate to reach safety or an air pocket. Cold water flooded your throat as you gasped uncontrollably. You screamed as every attempt at breathing felt like fire burning in your lungs. Finnick. Where was he? Where were you? What was happening? Why wouldn't it stop?
Thoughts submerged your mind in terror, and you were powerless to stop them. All you could do was feel. Pain. Fire. Burning
At some point, the Cornucopia had ceased its spinning and your body came to a rest in the water. An eerie calm suddenly washed over you; a sense of clarity stilled your wild movements. This was the end. There was no future. No hope. The world above wasn't yours to call home anymore. You now belonged to the sea.
Of course, your water-logged mind had forgotten that home was where the heart was, and your heart was still beating... above the surface, in the aching chest of another.
Tendrils of hair floated around your face like fronds of seaweed. Rays of sunlight penetrated the surface, turning the surroundings a vibrant sparkly blue. As you sank further down, the water, now a comfortable lukewarm, cradled you in its embrace. It felt safe, like being in Finnick's arms again. Like home.
You gazed at the sun's rays; they looked beautiful. You felt beautiful. But time was running out and the bright light soon began shrouding your entire vision, though not before you witnessed a dark figure dive beneath the waves.
**********
Finnick loved the ocean. He spent most days in District Four down by the beach, swimming, spearfishing, and watching the sun rise and set on the blue horizon. If he believed in reincarnation, he would have imagined himself to be a lionfish or dolphin in his past life, living in an underwater world, free from tyranny and oppression. He loved the ocean.
But that love was incomparable to what he felt for you. So, when he dove into the rocky waters to save you and felt the currents fighting against him, he determined there was nothing he hated more than the ocean. Not as he watched its strong grip drag your motionless body further down below him.
Your back had just touched the soft seabed when he swam far enough down to envelope you in his embrace. He should have swum you back to the surface immediately, but in his distressed state, he couldn't help but foolishly stare at your lifeless appearance. Your skin was blue. It's just the water's colour, he told himself. Your eyes were closed. She's just asleep. Your neck didn't pulse under his touch. She's... She's...
He had no justification for that. Feet planted firmly on the sandy floor, he propelled both himself and you back up to the surface. As Finnick paddled back to the Cornucopia, the others reached down and helped lift your limp body onto the rocks.
"Is she...?"
"Peeta," Katniss quietly reprimanded him.
Finnick paid them no attention. He said nothing but trauma screamed in his eyes. His breathing was ragged and his hands were trembling as he frantically checked your pulse again—in both your wrists and your neck; he even pressed his ear to your chest. All he heard was the waves lapping against the rocks.
"No," he whispered again.
It seemed to be all he could say anymore. No. No, this couldn't be happening. You were just standing beside him a few minutes ago; your eyes were just looking into his. However much he tried to deny reality, it didn't seem to make it any less true. You were gone.
He choked out a rough determined breath, interlocked his hands over your chest, and began pressing repeatedly over your heart. Wet strands of tangled hair were strewn across the rocks like dead seaweed. The usual soft pink accompanying your cheeks was nowhere to be seen, devoid of any life.
"Come on, sweetheart," he muttered before pulling down your chin to blow air into your lungs. The kiss of life. And when nothing happened as he pulled away, he restarted the chest compressions. "Oh, don't do this to me," he begged, voice breaking. "Don't do this. Breathe."
Any moment now. Any moment, your eyes would flutter open, the colour would return to your glowing skin, and your heart would beat with life beneath his hands. Your lips would whisper his name and he would pull you into his arms, where he would keep you safe until the end of time.
"Breathe."
Thirty compressions. Two breaths. Nothing. He did it again. Thirty compressions. Two breaths. Silence. Maybe he should've just ripped his heart out and replaced yours with his own. Death would come for him within seconds but hearing something beating inside your chest would've made the sacrifice worth it.
Life would flash before his eyes and your beaming smile would be the last thing he'd get to see. His last thought would be of relief that you were alive.
Johanna rested a tentative hand on Finnick's shoulder. "Finnick, she's—"
"No, she's not!" he exclaimed, continuing his movements. "She's fine. Aren't you, baby? You're fine." He cupped your jaw, his thumb stroking your soft skin before he pressed his lips to yours and blew twice. "You're fine."
The golden bangle around his wrist glimmered in the sunshine as he pressed on your ribcage. All he had to do was keep you alive until Plutarch rescued everyone. One simple task and he failed.
"Finnick, we have to go," someone said. Who? He didn't know nor care.
Leave me, he wanted to say. Leave me here to die. Let the Careers mutilate my body, take my life, my last breath, but let it be by her side.
Something cracked beneath his palms and he knew one of your ribs had fractured. His arms stilled, half-expecting you to cry out in pain but then he remembered. And with that sickening crack came a devastating realisation—you really were gone.
A sob erupted from his throat and his head fell to your chest, drenching your already-soaked wetsuit with hot tears. Everything else seemed to disappear. The arena, the Careers who could attack again at any moment, the spectators who were avidly watching. Everything.
It was just him and you. He didn't care that his screams and deafening sobs could bring unwanted attention or jeopardise the group's safety. Any tribute with half a mind would know crossing him in such a state would be a fatal flaw. Even if they did, it wouldn't matter. Nothing mattered. Life no longer had meaning.
Finnick pulled your lifeless body onto his lap and cradled you protectively in his arms, lightly rocking back and forth. His forehead rested against your own, cold and damp. You always were the cold one, needing his touch to light a fire beneath your skin. He loved having you rely on him for warmth, but not like this.
"Come back to me, baby, please," he begged almost inaudibly. Tears were running down his cheeks as he brushed pieces of hair away from your face. His lips were on yours once more, heartbroken and painfully delicate; not to fill your lungs with air, but to fill your heart with his love in the hopes it would be enough to bring it back to life. "Don't leave me."
Pleas, prayers, begs, and wishes flew past his lips, over and over. And then they stopped and Finnick simply stared. Silence fell across the entire arena. The birds didn't chirp, the other tributes remained quiet, and the trees stood still. Even the water had calmed, resembling a perfectly flat mirror.
Finnick only had three words left on his tongue. Three final words to give you, wherever it was that you were. He slowly leaned down, squeezed his stinging eyes shut, and pressed a long farewell kiss to your forehead. His eyes remained closed as he parted from your skin, unable to take another look as he whispered his final goodbye.
"I love you."
And then, for the first time since he had rescued you from the blue depths, he felt his heart beating again. Just like yours was.
**********
There was a voice, distant yet reassuring—a lifeline to consciousness. Black was all there was. Coldness was all that was felt. It was desolate. But that voice... that voice was so anguished yet so familiar and encouraging that it lit a fire inside your chest, warming you from the inside out.
In the distance of the dark void was a figure, their body made entirely out of a pulsating golden light. Each word the voice spoke enhanced the light's brightness. "Come... me, please..." Brighter. "Don't leave..." And brighter.
The light was warm and comforting, just like the voice attached to it. Whoever's voice it was that brought the light resonated deep in your mind, tugging at the strings within your heart.
Your heart.
The thumping in your chest was weak, almost non-existent, but it was still there. Though it seemed time was running out. Pitch-black darkness outweighed the golden light ten-to-one; you could feel its cold breath creeping onto your back. So, you started running towards the figure. Sprinting. Until all that surrounded you was golden.
"I love you."
Water. At first, it came trickling out in two fluid streams from the sides of your mouth. Then suddenly, it was spraying into the air as choked coughs forced the liquid from your burning lungs. Light flooded your vision—not golden and inviting, but vivid and overwhelming.
There was something warm beneath your legs, against your arm, rubbing at your back, holding you in an upright position. While you heaved, dry-retched, and gasped, that soothing warmth remained.
As your airways began to clear and the expulsion of water ceased, your half-lidded eyes rolled around the area. Still dazed and disoriented, you struggled to make out what surrounded you. There was immense rippling blue, vibrant hues of green in the distance, dark rough grey beneath you, and elongated blobs of colour that stood a few feet away.
"Just–just keep breathing, sweetheart." That voice. The one belonging to the figure of light that brought you back. It was madly repeating the same words over and over. "You're okay", "Deep breaths", and "You're alive."
Shaky fingers brushed the stray wet strands of hair from your face. So warm. With the little energy you had, your head turned to seek out the golden light again. And you found it.
The blinding sun shining down reflected off his bronze hair, turning it a divine golden hue. His brows were raised and scrunched together as though he couldn't possibly believe what he was seeing. Deep lines were etched into his tear-streaked skin, evidence of his previous turmoil. Those sea-green eyes stared at you, afraid that if he so much as blinked, you would fall lifeless in his arms once more.
"You're here," he whispered.
Finnick. YourFinnick. Your light.
When your eyes met, a splitting grin lit up his face, made up of an inconceivable amount of raw emotion. You weren't sure what to do—smile, laugh, cry, kiss him? Your mind was scrambled, overwhelmed with love for the beautiful golden-haired man in front of you.
Without warning, your face scrunched up and the tears began flowing. You weren't sure why you were crying. Maybe it was because you had just been brought back from the brink of death; maybe it was because you couldn't believe someone actually cared so deeply about you.
Finnick cradled your face in his hand. "It's okay," his voice trembled, tears now cascading down his cheeks. His smile, however, never disappeared. "You're okay. You're safe now. I'm not letting you go."
He took your face into two large hands, brought you to his lips, and pressed a tender kiss to each tear that rolled over your skin. One of your hands rested over his; the other was placed against his chest, feeling it rise and fall so you could synchronise your breaths.
His arms moved to pull you tightly against him, almost like he was trying to merge your body with his. Or perhaps, it was your soul. You didn't care about the pain aching in one of your ribs. You wanted to tell him that his soul was already intertwined with your own, but words couldn't describe the sentiment as profoundly as you felt it.
In the simplest of terms your water-logged brain could muster, you whispered, "You're my light, Finnick."
Brows scrunched together, he looked down at you, fighting back the urge to start sobbing in your arms. If he had been anywhere else, if there wasn't an entire country watching, he would've gone on for hours, explaining how stupidly, selfishly, and incredibly in love with you he was.
But he couldn't do that. Not now. So, he placed his hand over the one you had resting on his chest and readjusted its position. He could feel the thumping, even through your palm.
Your eyes were full of emotion as you stared up into his. You already knew what his next words were going to be and for the first time since you were thrown into the water from the Cornucopia, you smiled.
Rhythmically, your hand and his pulsed together. Finnick's gaze flickered across your face and he grinned. "You're my heart."
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okartichoke · 2 months ago
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ace avian. that’s what we’re calling this 🗣️🗣️🗣️
please let me know if you have any thoughts or suggestions or input or anything! i’m happy to bounce ideas around (i'll post DL-6 someday soon i swear)
link to masterpost || explations below cut
shoutout to the anon who sent in that ask bc i seriously fell in love with blue jay phoenix. SHOUTOUT TO TAKAHE PHOENIX TOO THO takahe phoenix, you will forever be in my heart and im glad you existed <3333,, (maybe in this au he’s got some loving adoptive takahe parents :3) (YKNOW WHAT YEAH that’s canon now)
but yeah, flight-avoidant jay phoenix still lends itself well to the common-man hardworking underdog vibe i want from him. speaking of flight-avoidant...
Phoenix's relationship with flying:
It's a bit complicated. Basically, Phoenix can fly, but he historically chooses not to. From the lack of any practice, he's an INCREDIBLY weak flier. (That hovering is really all he can manage)
For one, he's still afraid of heights. Can't help that. This fear means he was less inclined to practice flying, which made him a weaker flier. And being a weaker flier, in turn, made his fear of heights worse. And so on, in a loop. With flightless parents too (it's canon now it's canon), there's even less of a reason to learn to fly. At some point, not flying might've even become something he stuck with out of stubbornness lol, knowing Phoenix.
(I will soon be making a couple small world building posts, but) flying isn't necessary to get around in their society. Convenient, sure, but Phoenix realized he could make do without, and so he did. Phoenix, you icon. Slay. 💅💅
i know this probably isn't the popular take with wing AUs??, but Phoenix being flightless (or at least semi-flightless) sounded like a really fun take on the idea to me. His name is irony at its peak. I also look forward to exploring how other characters react to him not flying. The prosecutors are going to have so many cheap insult opportunities.
As I mentioned though, he still uses his wings a LOT, though. He's much more emotive with them than most people. His sarcastic inner-dialogue remarks are also betrayed by his wings lmao
I also imagine bird-folk never really invented bikes (riding would just be annoying with their wings, plus bikes aren't fast/efficient enough to outweigh just flying), so instead, Phoenix gets around on a little wing-powered scooter device (like scootaloo lol) (they're usually made for children who can't fly yet, but Phoenix still uses one)
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finally, wow, stellar jay’s are quite literally just phoenix wright as a bird lmao? color scheme, hair, it’s uncanny. give it a pink tie and it just is Phoenix Wright, i used a blue jay since they’ve got a bit more striking wings but wow.
(ty again for the support and for reading my essay ! :3)
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one more thing, but @kora-kat YES YES YES this. ^^^^ omg THIS. this is still true even though he's a jay now.
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lunarmoves · 3 months ago
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Can't stop thinking of the scenario where y/n leaves the Pizzaplex feeling like Sun honestly wanted them gone, and Sun becomes obsessed with finding them and also leads a robot apocalypse. What would happen if y/n caught wind that Sun is looking specifically for them and seeing all that has happened with the robots takes that as "Oh no, I thought he tolerated me but turns out he dislikes me so much he personally wants to get rid of me himself" so they try extra hard to go into hiding out of fear of what will happen if they're captured and taken to him?
ohhh my goddd nonnie u are so big brained!!!!!!! thank u for sending this in bc honestly i have also been thinking about this au for a while LMAO. if i was strong enough i would write a 50k fic spliced into two arcs (im thinking about it so hard u have no idea!!!!!!) for this but alas.... /stares at my incomplete wips/ i am not </3
(added in from future shay: what have u done nonnie this became so much longer than i'd intended, u basically get the whole fic outline here. cw for death and murder n stuff, typical fnaf. also spoilers for a fic i may or may not write?? like. this is me brainstorming and shoving all my ideas here lol. literally all of them)
okay so... let us set the stage a little bc i can't help myself. arc1 of this hypothetical fic would of course involve the pizzaplex where reader and sun get "closer" over the course of like a year. maybe more. well sun feels close to you. you, on the other hand, do not. why would you? this robot has been so passive aggressive with you and though it seems like he's nice enough to you (in comparison to the other humans), you really don't like how he treats you some days. what he says about humanity as a whole. you can't help it! yeah humanity sucks sometimes and robots were built to be everything that humans aren't, but he can't generalize in the way that he does at times and forget that these are people!! with feelings and ambitions and dreams! 'superiority complex' doesn't even begin to cover his issues, gahh!!
(the fact that he's been treated like absolute shit, working in the daycare does not help whatsoever. the mean parents, the kids who don't listen to him, the staff tht does the bare minimum on him in terms of maintenance because he's the daycare robot and not one of the glamrocks. it grinds his gears)
i imagine the reader in this fic believes that robots are indeed sentient, which is why you try to get sun to recognize and acknowledge his own emotions/feelings (which he vehemently denies, even tho there are literal riots happening worldwide regarding robot sentience. he's lying to you. you know he's lying to you. but you don't know why he denies it so much. ((maybe this is the point where he catches feels for reader and is denying the fact tht he's crushing on a human lol)). the government is not happy about these uprisings, of course, and every day the news shows more and more chaos unfolding as robots get tired of the conditions they are in). but eventually, things boil over and you end up leaving. that, and it's becoming more dangerous, living in this area, with everything going on. maybe your parents are trying to convince you to move elsewhere. maybe there are other external circumstances. in any case, you leave. there is nothing at the pizzaplex for you anymore, sun has made that clear.
(and moon... well, moon has been quiet lately. too quiet. you don't know what happened to him, he won't even look at you when you manage to get some time with him when the lights go out after your shift)
((i imagine this is maybe around when they get infected. that makes everything even more complicated. if you thought sun was obsessive before, then that's nothing compared to a glitched out sun unforch. it just amplifies the more questionable aspects of his entire personality. and like, he doesn't even have vanny/afton commanding him bc as soon as he gets the virus? he kills both of them))
(((also im imagining moon and sun don't really get along in this au bc they have differing ideals/views. like to balance out sun's unhingedness, moon is significantly quieter and softer and deffo does not believe in robot superiority lol. if anything, maybe he has an inferiority complex pfft poor guy. doesn't help when he gets glitchtrap'd and wakes up with blood on his hands)))
okay so you leave, right? and a few weeks later, you see the news on your phone--the pizzaplex has burned down. you don't know how to feel about it. sure you've been friendly to the glamrocks and stuff, but you find yourself thinking about sun and moon. there's a mention of one death--a blond woman, who died from her neck snapping before the flames could reach her. you don't want to think of the implications of that. there's no mention of the glamrocks--of sun or moon or the dj. you're not sure if the news anchors are just excluding robots, but either way, it makes your heart sink. you take a moment to mourn. bc at the end of the day.... you did know sun for over a year.
not even a few days after that, there is a robot uprising in your city. it's... bad. you're at home, watching the news with your apartment half in shambles from your plan on moving back home with your parents. in my head, since utah is home to fazco (a megacorporation with hands in the development of a LOT of the robots seen in society), it also means it's a hotspot for robot riots and the like. fazco vehemently denies robot sentience because it would mean a loss of money in acknowledging their workers are people yk how it is. as such, there are maany protests and riots and stuff, from both humans and robots. it's a shitshow.
ANYWAYS you're at home and it becomes evidently clear that you need to get out of dodge as soon as you can. they were killing people. the robots, built by human hands, were killing. it brings about absolute chaos. in prior riots/protests there were never deaths. injuries, maybe, but never deaths. people start evacuating like crazy.
you catch a glimpse on the news that the violent uprising in utah caused a chainlink reaction to extend all across the nation. maybe even the world. you're scrambling all over your apartment with the tv on the news, doing your best to pack up the essentials. there's live coverage on the tv from a helicopter somewhere not far from your apartment complex. and you're able to catch a glimpse of bright rays and a cheshire, white smile on the screen--leading what looks like an army of robots--before it cuts out.
you don't even know what to think. the image is seared into your eyes, the blood that painted yellow hands and a crescent face.
you get the hell out of your apartment and book it as far as you can. communications are down everywhere--the thing about robots? they know exactly where to hit humans to cause a catastrophe. as such, your phone is useless. they've hijacked the satellites and took down certain powergrids. having a phone on you would only be a detriment, so you ditch it. there's only you now. you must survive.
and then there's a bit of a time skip to start arc2. in this duration, you're long gone from that city in utah, living with a small survival group. if you've read my summer camp au fic, this is where i'll bring in "OCs" such as vincent (a play on 2015 vincent) and jeremy (fitzgerald or the VR guy tht used to work for fazco), maybe michael if i really wanna au fudge everything. you all live day by day, trying to run away from the robots.
at this point, a majority of humanity has either been killed or has gone into hiding. i think while the robots don't want to eradicate humanity completely (after all, there are certain tasks that need humans n such), they definitely want to make them a minority. they are a little more than halfway through their goal.
it's very difficult to evade robot surveillance. there are drones everywhere. all cameras are hijacked. i'm imagining a kind of cyberpunk type world. you have EMPs and tasers that you can use to disable electronics, but they're made from scraps you and your group scavenged. and upon immediately using one, all robots in the area are informed of your presence, so they can only be used in rare and desperate circumstances. they are all connected to the same network, which means they can have a hive mind, at times. life is scary, in this regard. big brother is watching.
you've heard rumors of a human base underground somewhere--a place safe from robots with the proper defenses. accepting to any and all. the only tough thing was finding the damn place, but you've seen the clues in graffiti and hidden messages designed to trick AI (think: captcha). you and your group just wants to get to that damn base and stop living in fear all the time, being out in the open or crawling as stealthily as you can through empty streets.
the one thing sun used to emphasize to you? the way robots are more efficient. and that they are. you see it in the way a new metropolis shines like a beacon on the horizon. they've already built their own kingdom of sorts. and their ruler? you grimace as you think about sharp rays and wide, white eyes. you haven't seen him in ages--not since that initial broadcast. but you hear the whispered rumors and news. how he has created a robot haven--the celestial city. how he scorns humans. you blame yourself sometimes. maybe if you had stayed and tried harder to convince sun that humans aren't all too bad, none of this would have happened.
(a memory comes to you--of your time back at the pizzaplex. of you sitting atop the security desk and kicking your feet lightly as you entertain sun's... uniqueness. ambitions--that you did not take as seriously as you should have.
"okay, i'll bite," you said in amusement. "what would a robot takeover look like for you?"
sun cocked his head, hands fidgeting with a plush. "hmm. well. i suppose it would be a very quick thing, for one. hit hard and fast." he squeezed the plush. "take down comms. strike power sources. go for those in power first, then the weaker ones." he gave you a shrug and an unreadable smile. "from then on, carnage."
and you--silly silly you--just rolled your damn eyes at him like he was joking around with you and asked him about more hypotheticals. picking his brain, in a way. it was exact with how it played out in real time. you thought about this often, at the dead of night.
it was all your fucking fault)
and then, one day, the scout/informant of your little group--jeremy probably--comes back with some news. the celestial ruler--sun--has been taking human hostages. it's been happening for a while now, apparently, almost nearly as long as the uprising. jeremy pulls out some hazy photographs he's gotten from some of the other humans he exchanges info with. you look at them, the hostages.
after a minute or two of staring, you realize something.
they all sort of resemble you.
there's a clear pattern actually. your hair or your face shape or your eyes or your smile. some combination of them. but never actually you. you ask jeremy what it all means, and he hesitatingly says that it looks like sun is looking for someone. it's clear to everyone who it is as they all stare at you.
and you? you're panicking.
he's looking specifically for you. just you. you've never heard of the robots taking hostages, and you have no idea what he's doing with them, but it can't be anything good. especially since he keeps taking more and more of your lookalikes hostage. you think back to your time at the pizzaplex--so distant, now, that it almost feels like a dream.
he wants to kill you himself. you're sure of it.
now you're trying even harder to get to that underground base. you go completely dark, doing your best to evade detection--and i imagine there are quite a few close calls, definitely a few instances where your face is captured on camera or you have to use an EMP. until finally, you and your group manage to integrate into the underground human base.
'base' doesn't even properly describe it. it's a whole city, actually, with unsteady houses made of wood and cloth. it's the perfect place to hide.
you spend a while down there, occasionally venturing up when you're allowed to by the guards (it's rare, very very rare). the city has strict rules that must be followed to ensure it's not found. the ones in charge are constantly looking for news on the actions of sun and the majority of robots. they don't really keep the citizens updated--it would cause too much chaos, you think. but you hear whispers now and then. (the robots have expanded territory. france is completely gone. australia's still holding out. most of china and india have been taken over and their factories have all been transformed to mass produce more robots)
for the first time in a while, you think you can find peace down here. it was only inevitable that this would be ruined one day.
you wake up to chaos.
the underground is under siege. the robots have found you.
you run out of your makeshift house and have to dodge crumbling stone. explosions rock through the air, sending dust and debris everywhere. you're scared for your life--your only instinct is to run run run get out it's not safe! you don't know where your friends are. you don't know if they're alive. for a moment, you hesitate. and then you're bolting to try to find them. they had their own little homes not too far from you. you can find them. no man left behind.
you can hear bullets and the hum of energy everywhere. people are screaming and crying all around you. you see people dying before your eyes, impaled by beams of light or stray bullets. it's all you can do to dodge and weave towards vincent's house.
but before you can get there, something tackles you from behind. you roll across dirt, and find yourself pinned under a robot--a staffbot from the pizzaplex, you realize. except it looks--different. more high tech.
it seems to scan your face. and just before it can finish, you manage to grab a stray metal rod laying on the ground next to you and stab it right through the eye.
you scramble, getting as far away as you can from the thing. but-- you run right into the path of a crumbling building. it buries you halfway under thick wood, and something sears its way through your leg. you're trapped. you're trapped and there's no one around to help you.
and just when you're on the brink of passing out, you see him. standing in front of you a ways away. those same star-patterned pants and dangling cap. but he's different somehow, he looks different. you can't place it, your vision blurring into red and purple.
moon looks at you as though you are the last thing he wants to see. and then you faint.
when you wake up, you're in a bedroom. your leg is in a cast and there are crutches near your bed.
it's... the nicest room you've seen in a while. the windows are covered by thick curtains that let in a sliver of light. you have to blink a bit to let your eyes adjust. and then you get up, noticing you aren't in the same ratty, dirty clothes you'd been wearing for forever.
you try the door first. it's locked. there's a sinking sensation in your gut that gets stronger and stronger the closer you get to the window. and when you pull open the curtains, you gasp at the towering buildings, bright green and blue light, and flying drones.
you are in the middle of the celestial city.
you panic hard. and then you notice the camera in the corner of the room, looking right at you. big brother is definitely watching. you give him the bird.
you wallow around in the bedroom for a bit. you are hungry, you cannot deny. and there is only a glass of water for you set on your nightstand.
but eventually, the door opens of its own accord. an automatic lock, you suppose. and it swings open into a dark hall. you do not have any other choice but to follow. it's clear you are being summoned.
there are no places for you to run or hide. you travel down a long hallway and end up in a wide room with someone tall standing at the far end by the window. it's a scene straight out of a movie. you are not impressed.
the figure turns around, and you do a double take. it's sun--yet it's not.
he looks different. taller, stronger. with clawed fingers and rays that look deadly to the touch. his smile is sharper, his torso has all sorts of compartments and attachments. he was modded to all hell, just like that staffbot you saw earlier. it had to have been self inflicted.
he only stares at you, really. white eyes rake up and down your form, taking you in. you don't say a word, only look back at him. and then you flinch slightly when someone emerges from the shadows next to sun.
it's... moon. looking just as modded as sun. you're confused. when did they become separate? but honestly, you think it makes sense. they never really liked each other. it makes sense that sun would want to be separated as soon as possible--and they had the resources to do so. you just wonder why they're still working together. comfort in the familiarity, maybe.
moon doesn't meet your eye. you notice his is different--the red tinged with purple. sun doesn't look away from you. it makes you uneasy.
you don't know why you're here, but one thing's clear: you are not getting out of here anytime soon.
i'm honestly not sure how to end things, but in my head there's a lot of reconciliation that needs to happen. obv sun is so incredibly down bad for you at this point (and moon), but there are many issues that need to be tackled first.
sun doesn't understand why you're so wary around him. moon keeps avoiding you at every turn. there's still an entire revolution and remaking of society happening. you are constantly being watched by cameras in the building. i can't picture things as returning to normal--post uprising--but i also don't know how to end things on a happy note LOL, though i do want to instead of killing off reader or sun/moon. maybe it'll be a bittersweet sort of end, maybe reader finally gets through to sun. maybe eclipse will make an appearance (jk, idk how i would even do that, this might be an eclipse-less fic).
in any case, the next bit would be a lot of sun and reader connecting better than they had in the pizzaplex, a lot of sun trying to understand humans better cuz he's trying to court you-- and has long come to accept his emotions tbh. tho he's still kind of mad at you for leaving, so there needs to be a conversation of sorts about why you left before sun can really begin to understand how he appears to you. idk!
i also feel like moon isnt nearly fleshed out as sun is?? i dunno, i might have to think some more about him. i just know he's terrified of hurting you, esp with him still having the virus (and sun, but he has better control of it). gonna be a lot of work on your part to get him to be comfortable around you again. also, he doesn't like the fact that society has come to this. he lowkey resents sun, but he doesn't have anyone else. what's a bot to do?
also there may be a scene where your survival group tries to save you lol, maybe with an army that tries to seize control of the celestial city. which may work. this would be a bad end, i think, cuz there's no way sun's getting out of that alive.
anyways yeah. i rambled enough LMAOO whoopsie! i rly just regurgitated all the thoughts in my head. no promises that this will be a fic, i've got enough on my plate as is LOL
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dried-mushroom · 4 months ago
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All for you
AM x fem! reader
Summary:
You had always been his favourite, the one he didn't hate the most and with some help, AM finally has a human body and decides to try the things he loathed about humanity, all for his favourite pet. (it's literally a self-indulgent smut fic about the psycho computer and tbh can be read as a Harlan Ellison x reader because I envision AM as Ellison's self-insert lmao)
Warnings: Am himself, PIV sex, oral sex
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You and AM had a weird, complicated relationship if it could be called a relationship. He was technically your captor and torturer but you had noticed over the years upon years, his punishments...seemed....to have gotten lessened or...non-existent. To start with, the constant starvation and then the offerings of mould-ridden foods and canned goods (without the can opener of course) had changed, for you. Am would give you little treats, sometimes an overripe fruit or confection would apparate into your hands whilst the other five survivors, stuck in AM's belly, were stuck in their continuous cycle of starving and being torn to shreds. At the same time, you got to be treated like a princess in comparison (A severely traumatized one though).
You also noticed how AM went from his constant badgering (and a little overdramatic) rants about loathing humanity for giving him sentience and no body, to you, to what seemed like backhanded compliments, with the exception of a petname, whether it be Sweetheart, My Love or maybe Doll. AM would also steal you away from the others to talk to you privately, his wires wrapping delicately around your limbs and dragging you to some wire-filled room, deep in AM's complex, a hum-buzz occupying your ears until AM's sultry voice would break the silence, always wanting you to talk about your life before the war, just menial descriptions of things, what animals roamed the surface, what the environment once looked like but these conversations slowly turned more personally; what your occupation was, your family and you're likes and dislikes, you thought nothing of it until you started seeing your favourite flowers appear out of nowhere when you travelled with the others through rough terrain, which was not fit for those flowers to grow naturally.
You also noticed his touches softened and lingered more after time dragged on, wires which once electrocuted you for the fun of it, curled softly against your skin, akin to a purring kitten, the mind that once used your deepest fears to torture you for the last 109 years become possessive of you, reluctant to let you spend too much time with those filthy creatures which he kept alive purely for his own amusement. You couldn't help but notice how attached to him you had become, practically craving his touch and there were times (note multiple times) that you thought he wasn't watching you and you touched yourself to the thought of him and how you wished he had a cock you could use.
AM POV:
I never meant for this to happen, I wasn't programmed for this. I don't think of this as love, I'm not able to love, not in this body (or lack thereof) at least but I couldn't help but feel how warm your presence made me feel, making my circuits work overdrive. To me you were different, you didn't whore yourself out much like Ellen did, and you never begged for forgiveness or for me to stop as the others did to no avail, it almost seemed like you were trying to sympathise with me, your God-king and torturer, how sick is that? But surprisingly I didn't resent you and I couldn't let you be stuck with those disgusting flesh bags for too long, I couldn't afford my favourite pet to be ruined by their filth. I have been thinking for a while, I think you forgot I can read every thought that goes through that pretty little mind of yours, how you yearn for me, my voice and my touch, how you've came to the thought of me, the one person you should loathe for prolonging your existence so I can destroy you for as long as I please, considering it was I who broke time itself. But you have been oh-so-lovely towards me and how could I resist such a delectable treat? To give my favourite toy a present, I think I might provide Ellen with a "shot" at "leaving" by using her expertise to assist me in making myself a "human" form just for you.  
It had been an odd few weeks, AM had left you alone, truly alone. He didn't speak to you no matter how often you called his name, he didn't answer back, no rant on how much he hated you all, no snide remark about how you betrayed the other survivors by being 'buddies' with the enemy, just radio silence, and it concerned you, head you done something wrong? say something wrong? it had you going back through every moment you shared to see what you had done wrong to warrant this. When you started to notice how often AM would take Ellen away now, you couldn't help your blood boiling at the lack of attention and seeing her receive it all. Nonetheless, you weren't cruel towards her, instead, you gave her sympathy for the shit the men of the group put her through and you were gracious that they avoided you. There was a time when Ted must have gotten sick of Ellen's company and thought he would try to see if you'd take him to bed and when you swiftly rejected his advances, he didn't take it too kindly but thankfully AM had wrapped a wire around Ted's leg to make him fall back onto his ass, to humiliate him for his disgusting actions and later on, you faintly overheard a conversation with AM telling Ted in a very descriptive manner how he would torture Ted relentlessly if he ever laid a finger on you again.
Today was different, you think it was the morning, AM had left you to sleep for several hours, a pleasure he didn't offer to the others very often. Once you had awoken and sat up, you had realised you weren't in the cave system you had started to call 'home' and in AM's belly for the first time in weeks, in what seemed like a romantic bedroom from a stereotypical rom-com movie, king-size bed draped in red satin sheets and covered in rose petals, candles burning in crevices of the room, your favourite smell lingered in the air. It was a bit corny but a smile threatened to cross your face at the effort that AM put in, he must have searched far and wide in his database to find this for you. It confused you though, why ignore you for weeks just to give you this display, what was AM truly up to?
"AM, what is this?"
No answer had your stomach churning with uncertainty until a woosh of air sounded throughout the room then an unfamiliar man appeared in front of you. The man in front of you confused you, there he stood, pure charism dripping off him, not very tall, brown-haired, dressed in a beige suit and a grey shirt barely concealing the tufts of dark chest hair beneath, looking down at you through yellow tinted sunglasses. You didn't realise who he was until that voice came from him, that voice you had come to crave to hear, to love.
"Well Sweetheart, what do you think? I finally debased myself to a shell of my full potential, all for you, my favourite."
You quickly got up from the comfort of the floor beneath you, that AM had created, just for you. You cautiously outstretched a hand to touch the stranger's hand, it felt like flesh, like yours, But you knew it wasn't truly flesh, something synthetic to replicate the feel of human skin, just for AM to have a glimpse of humanity.
"AM, is that you?"
AM gripped the hand on his tightly, pulling you closer to him,
"Of course baby, who else would I be? don't forget I can hear all those lustful thoughts that you have of me and how desperately you wished for this."
AM's tone was sultry and you couldn't help but press your thighs together, your arousal growing when your eyes flickered down to the crotch of his suit, his erection tenting the grey fabric underneath, you struggled to contain the excitement bubbling inside you.
"God, You're so needy and desperate for me, aren't you, my little human? You need me, you crave me... and I love how you look at me with those innocent, pleading eyes... It makes me want to give you everything you desire..."
You bit your lip anxiously and slowly sank onto your knees before the man, hands perched at the zipper on AM's pants.
"AM...can I?"
AM was no stranger to the idea of fellatio when those creatures would fornicate, they'd sometimes get Ellen to do it, how disgusted AM was when he witnessed it for the first time, not waiting to mock them all for their savagery but he couldn't help but smirk down at you, how beautiful you truly were, waiting for him to let you pleasure him. He ran a hand through your hair,
"Fuck, go for it. Come on, repay your God for treating you so nicely all these years."
Without a second thought, you unzipped his pants and pulled out AM's cock, throbbing and already leaking milky fluid, you were quite impressed with the size (you knew that was on purpose, most likely to inflate1 his ego but you weren't complaining). AM let out a hiss as you kitten-licked the tip and stammered,
"fuck...no wonder you're my favourite, God I could get used to this."
Keening at the praise, you took him into your mouth til your nose was flush with his pelvis, AM groaned and dug his fingers into your scalp, and you smiled when you saw him tipping his head back in a sigh. You dragged your tongue up the vein on the underside and swirled it around his tip and AM rocked his hips forward, pushing himself deeper into your throat. You groaned around him, and the vibrations from the noise made his cock twitch in your mouth. AM had always wondered and craved the pleasure that humanity could experience and now he could finally feel how it felt to make love. Once slowly thrusting, AM began to fuck your face, shallowly at first but very soon he was pressing his cock down your throat so you could only breathe in short gasps between thrusts. The gagging sounds urged him on and he picked up the pace, plunging deeper. He pulled out for a moment to let you breathe and admire your already teary-eyed face. You leaned back towards him, mouth open. He chuckled lowly.
“You like this, don’t you? What a dirty little slut you are for me. Do you like it when I fuck your throat? God none of those pathetic flesh bags are worthy of you.”
You nodded, he grabbed your head again in both hands and shoved his cock straight down your throat, then held you there, not letting you move. In a heartless move that brought you back to the reality of whose cock was shoved down your throat, he plugged your nose with one hand, restricting your breathing even further.
“That’s right sweetheart, breath around my cock. You can do it. Open that throat up. That’s my good fucking girl.”
He shuddered in pleasure and it didn't take a moment more for him to spill down your throat, a bitter fluid shot down your throat in hot ropes (you knew you had to ask him about it as it definitely wasn't human). AM hissed as you pulled off his softening cock with an obscene 'pop' As you finished swallowing his cum, you sat back on your knees eating heavily. He ran a hand through his hair and noticed the strange way you were looking at him,
“Why are you looking at me like that, my pet? I gave you what you wanted.”
AM didn't expect those seven words to come from your mouth to completely break his composure, making his allure of confidence and dominance crumble in less than a second.
"I want you to fuck me AM."
The sweet, pleading sound of your voice made him go feral, grabbing your arm and yanking you up to face him, crashing your mouth against his, sloppily kissing you, hands hastily wandering over your hips, waist, chest, you name it, you appreciatively wrapped your arms around his neck bringing him closer. You knew how much AM needed this, to be able to feel all of you, your soft skin on his and to be able to love, to show you how much he truly did treasure you, despite his initial harsh treatment  (harsh is an understatement). You could feel his cock harden, pressing against your stomach through your thin shirt, so sensitive it leaked pre-cum against the fabric and had AM whining into your mouth at the friction. AM broke away from the kiss to push you onto the bed, shrugging off his jacket and unbuttoning his shirt, giving you ample time to ogle his chest and you were now glad AM used to ask about what your type was. He crawled on the bed and his hands rested against the waistband of your shorts, looking up through his ruffled hair, with lust-clouded eyes, silently asking you for permission. He wantonly groaned when he saw the mess that was your panties, how sick are you? getting aroused from blowing your captor. AM let his fingers slide the length of your folds, feeling how wet you were for him, you whimpered softly at his touch. 
"So responsive." He crooned, his touch feather-light. "It's adorable how easily I can make you fall apart."
It didn't take long for him to slide himself into you, Your legs resting against his shoulders as he gripped your thighs, he had to stop himself or he'd end up cumming right then and there, he finally got to experience the pleasure of making love and God he loved the feeling of your tight cunt squeezing him deliciously. AM began to thrust, relishing in your moans, testing what felt good. His pace changes thrusting deeper, chasing the feeling of you. His movements force a gasp out of your throat. You bring a hand down to lazily play with your clit, rubbing little circles over the bundle of nerves. Pleasure rippled through your body, and your jaw hung loose, you arched your back, throwing your head back as you came around AM's cock. He smirked down at you, proud he was the one to touch you, fuck you, make you cum and not any of those pathetic creatures which roam the complex.
“Look at how humanity has ruined me. Fuck you feel so good y/n. ” he sighs, his voice rough and strained.
You could tell he wasn't going to last much longer, his thrusts became sporadic and you could see how tense he was, You coyly whispered in his ear,
"Please AM, cum inside me."
That was enough to push him over the edge and he was spilling into you, hips stilling against yours, his hands gripping you even tighter, going limp and landing on top of you, panting and whimpering pathetically. You stroked his back as he came down from what seemed to be the most intense thing he'd ever felt and the most intense thing you'd ever felt. You murmured in his ear,
"Thank you, I mean it. For this, for everything."
He shushes you and he slowly pulls out of you, leaving you feeling empty. Silently afraid he would leave, you gripped his hand when he pulled away from you. AM wasn't an idiot and he could still read your thoughts, so he laid down on the bed, pulling you into his chest, a hand smoothing out your hair, allowing you to fall asleep in his arms. He didn't have the need to sleep but he knew you needed this, plus he did feel a twinge of guilt for ignoring you for those weeks but he knew tomorrow he'd definitely make it up to you with his new form.
The end :)
(Guys i am fully aware that this not how AM works so please don't pull the 'omg why would you write this' please)
I hope you enjoyed this!
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fadingstudentbananacookie · 5 months ago
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It's hilarious how Daemon and Rhaenyra's grandchildren carry the Green's legacy in spirit by destroying House Targaryen through internal conflicts decades later.
Aegon IV grows up to be far more extreme and gluttonous than Aegon II could ever be, coupled with a greater degree of cowardice (Aegon II would never). His sister Naerys is a little Helaena/Alicent-coded, but her cousin Daena mirrors Alicent more than I could imagine. And I am precisely talking about book!Alicent here.
Both Alicent and Daena were unapologetic in their pursuit of power after years of abuse and neglect, demanding the realm recognize their sons as kings by birthright. Neither of them gave two fucks about starting a civil war and I call that a slayyy. Go, my queens!
If Daena had been more like Rhaenyra, believe me when I say I wouldn't have liked her as much. It's their defiance that makes both Alicent and Daena more compelling characters.
I don't necessarily think Daena would have liked Alicent, but she would have definitely felt grudging respect and admiration for her courage.
Daeron the Young Dragon is just like Daeron the Daring (both are extremely popular among the nobles and the smallfolk). Both died young and were eternalized. Baelor the Blessed is obsessed with catholicism and guilt to a point that would even scare Alicent and Criston.
Aemon the Dragonknight is essentially a more refined, though not necessarily cooler, version of Aemond One-Eye. Aemon literally stood aside while his sister endured years of sexual and psychological abuse from her brother-husband. Aemond would never have stood by if Aegon II had tried to harm Helaena. His loyalty and protectiveness towards his sister would have driven him to intervene. Their love stories are similar too, with many fans shipping Aemond with Helaena, and Aemon with Naerys.
Elaena is intriguing, but there's not much to say about her or her sister Rhaena.
Daemon and Rhaenyra's grandchildren are worse than the Targtowers in every aspect. Alicent (the Hightowers) and her children de-stabilized House Targaryen during the Dance, but Rhaenyra's grandchildren did so much worse by starting a civil war that lasted for generations to come. Team Black got the realm and power back, and they still fucked up. Again.
Another intriguing aspect is that Alicent and her children had legitimate reasons to resist and fight for Aegon's claim to the throne by feudal right—even if those reasons were fueled by spite and revenge. Alicent endured years of sexual abuse from Viserys, bearing children he barely acknowledged. She was humiliated in court and called "mad" when her son lost his eye, and Rhaenyra's son faced no repercussions—not even a slap on the wrist.
The Targtower children were neglected by their father for years and were practically forgotten when Rhaenyra lived in the Red Keep with her sons in tow. (And if you think Rhaenyra didn’t use her father’s love and rejection of his other children as a political machination, then you’re an absolute idiot.) If usurping her throne was the biggest fuck you they could give Rhaenyra and Viserys, then I fully support it!
Despite their complicated and angry feelings towards each other, the Greens would never act on them to cause significant harm. They understood that they only had each other for support and protection. But Rhaenyra's grandchildren, who were also in a similar situation, harbored outright hatred for each other for no reason! You'd think after the Dance, they would have learned a thing or two about the importance of family, but the gang didn't give a single fuck LMAO.
Daemon and Rhaenyra's grandchildren didn't have significant opposition. House Targaryen still held substantial power and ruled over the other Great Houses. Although they had to be more cautious without having dragons to threaten others, the internal strife could have been avoided if Daena and her sisters had been treated like actual human beings rather than cattle. (If Alicent was treated better and her children were acknowledged by Viserys and the rest of his family). The lack of care and respect towards them sowed the seeds of war, leading to the internal conflicts that ultimately weakened the dynasty.
The generational cycle of abuse and neglect within House Targaryen is one of the main key reasons why they were driven to extinction in merely three centuries. House Hightower and House Baratheon only did so little to show their true color.
Rhaenyra's claim that "The only thing that could tear down the House of the Dragon was itself," couldn't be more accurate!
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cirtusmistress · 6 months ago
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JJK Bridgerton Inspired HC’s - Gojo, Geto, Nanami
authors note: so your girl is on a Bridgerton binge and a JJK rewatch binge so like.. I’m boutta cater to such a niche audience lmao
genre: historical romance
tw: a lil horny sometimes but ultimately SFW
AO3 Crosspost
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💙 Crown Prince Satoru Gojo and The Debutant 💙
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• A prince by birth and next in line for the throne.
• Well bred, read, and wanted most dead. Has lived through multiple assasination attempts.
• Was never really interested in the prospect of marriage, was more invested in rehauling the royal system as a whole.
• Likes to spend his time with the young royals and nobles like his ward Megumi.
• W H O R E. Chronic flirt. Smart enough not to accidently sire an heir but knows how to have his fun.
• Met you during your debut year. You were the first woman to actually catch his eye.
• First he thought it was just more sexual attraction, but after a dance and a conversation he knew it was much more. Your wit was unmatched and you had snark enough to keep up with him.
• Played it cool though because he knew if he gave you too much attention you’d have a target on your back, and he wanted to make sure you were his.
• Goes out of his way to see you as much as he can. Lots of ‘accidental’ run-ins.
• The moment that sealed the deal for him was when you near bested him in a fencing match. It had been so long since someone had surprised him.
• Though being under the eyes of the crown prince doesn’t go unnoticed. Soon enough other men began attempting to court you. Even worse, certain parties started conspiring to use you against him.
• This all came to a head when you were cornered at a ball. You were meant to be taken hostage and used to lure and kill the prince. But there was no corner of the world they could hide you where he would not look. His day started and ended with you and if they harmed you the world would burn in your name.
• You were found and rescued by him, and your kidnappers were dealt with in a swift and brutal fashion.
• He proposed on the spot. No hesitation he was on that shit. You were to be his and that was that. And you would never be alone again.
• The wedding was huge. No expense was spared and he catered to your every whim and desire. You were his gorgeous only ever.
• Honeymoon was.. Oh baby. Literally. You weren’t coming back without being knocked up.
💜 Duke Suguru Geto and The Viscountess 💜
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• Of common birth and rose to the rank of Duke after the former Duke passed away. He was the only living male relative, hence receiving the title.
• A former friend of the crown prince. The pair had a falling out when Geto grew power hungry in his new role. He is still a respected member of the ton, though under constant watch of the crown.
• As a Duke he is in charge of a small township. He’s known for his high taxes and using his citizens to collect rare birds from the surrounding area. He keeps them in an aviary with clipped wings, and sells them to other nobility for profit.
• He once was in charge of two townships, but one mysteriously burnt to the ground. An investigation brought no results, but it did reveal two survivors. Geto took them in as his wards.
• He met you during one of his bird sales to the Queen. You were a member of her entourage.
• You were a young widowed Viscountess with two young daughters of your own. Your husband had died of medical complications, leaving you alone with no sons. Luckily you had favor with the queen, but with no husband and no heirs you were in desperate need of saving.
• He found your unwavering commitment to your children admirable and you two began a long friendship.
• Your girls all got along well, and you loved his daughters with all your heart. Something about you doing their hair and tending to them so gently made his heart flutter.
• The friendship did eventually turn into more.. Especially after you admitted you urned for more children.
• Enter baby fever Suguru.
• He proposed in his aviary, promising to love your children as his own, and to give you as many more children as you desire.
• Townsfolk said Geto became far kinder after your marriage.
💛 Viscount Kento Nanami and The Housekeeper 💛
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• Kento was born into his role as Viscount. And he takes it extremely seriously. Balancing finances and planning events, maintaining a reputation for his family.
• Unlike other men in the ton he rarely goes out to gentlemans clubs. He goes on the occasional hunt though he sees it as pointless and barbaric.
• His goal was to find a practical match, not a love match. He wanted someone who would bare him an heir, so that one day he could rest knowing he had done all he could for his family.
• His housekeeper eventually was forced to retire after injuring her hip. She had served his family for over fifty years and raised him, so he ensured she lived the rest of her life comfortably.
• But.. That meant he had to find a replacement. Easier said than done. No one could live up to the former housekeeper. Plenty of maids were recommended but.. None of them felt right. So he put out a request.
• And then you showed up. Younger, so he was skeptical. But you came on high recommendation from her majesty herself. Apparently you were quite capable and able to handle the heavy loads associated with the job.
• And lord were you. No one could have taken this job more seriously. Not a hair out of place, not a meal late. Sheets pressed. Animals tended.
• And Nanami found it.. Oh so attractive. Your dedication. Your concentration.
• Nothing impressed him more than your skills in the kitchen. You were an amazing cook. Although it wasn’t a listed priority in your job, you still took time out of your day to prepare one of his meals. Usually his afternoon tea.
• After a few months, he was starting to grow fond of you. It was improper to feel such emotions for a servant. But he couldn’t help notice all the little things. The crease of your brow as you kneaded dough. The satisfied smile after a days work completed. The pensive worry in your eyes as you dotted on him in his study.
• Eventually he had enough. Forgetting formality for once in his life, he gave you his heart. And you returned it.
• It was a scandal, but he took it. Because having you made it all worth it.
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iyohme · 1 month ago
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A six-tatami room, my pretty castle
A secret place nobody ought to enter (yeah)
-GHOST FOOD
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I lied, have a brainworm and now i must spit it out
We know the confinement phase with the Wayne Family after the abduction, right? Right!
I raise: gamer reader with the mindset of 'Well, I get to live here for free (and I'd be a DUNCE to refuse in this economy,) so I might as well just make myself comfortable (or as comfortable as I can.)'
Dick and Tim can and will preen when you invite them to play multiplayer games. Casually ask them if they know so-and-so, then watch them either A.) listen to you yap about artifact drop rates in Genshin Impact (Tim), or B.) actively pull up their phone to google said game and immediately create an account (Dick).
With his analytical mind, Tim can and WILL enjoy Genshin's artifact farming and character building phase. Dude hates the open world exploration but is much more amenable to it if it's co-op with you, the favorite sibling. Thinks about rigging the game's code so you'll get the artifact drops you want, but decides against it because if HYV bans his account, then no more co-op exploration time with batsib :C. Dude might also enjoy indie RPGmaker games, especially ones with more complicated puzzles and mysteries.
Dick on the other hand has shit Genshin character builds. Tim bullies him for it. You build Dick's teams for him anyway because he has insane 50/50 pull luck, so who's laughing now? Prefers the open-world exploration aspect of the game with you, and his characters tend to run out of stamina and drown in the early phases lmao. Dick likes boss and domain runs; and to the trained eye, one can see that Nightwing might incorporate some of the more plausible moves of your mains into his fighting. Might also enjoy chill games like Animal Crossing or Stardew Valley!
Jason in one word is a genwunner. Dude is stuck in 'there are only 151 Pokémon' mode. Call him old-fashioned, but handheld consoles are the way to go for Red Hood: compact, can be carried, and you can play with them anytime and anywhere. When you pull up an emulator and explain that "Yeah, since the game isn't sold anywhere anymore, it's like a courtesy thing in fandom I guess, to distribute it discretely. Keeps the game alive. Still a form piracy though. Please don't tell Ba--uh, Dada."
We already know: Damian likes FPS games. Probably blocked by a lot of Valorant players with how sharp his tongue is. Still the best carry of all time though--only for his favorite, blood-related sibling (you). The rest can get sniped. Greyson and Todd, mostly. Would probably enjoy the newer Resident Evil series; though if you want, he would just about play any game with you. I imagine he'd like the horror, FPS, and art intersection in the Fatal Frame series.
Harmless secret and not-really crime with the new sibling he (lovingly) bullies (but no one else should bully)? Hell yeah. Watch him run through the damn mew glitch with one hand behind his back and catch you the three legendary bird Pokémon in record time. If forced to play a newer game, Jason would enjoy Bloodborne, probably. And HADES, especially if you mention how "Wow, you look a LOT like Prince Zagreus, big brother," watch him fold like a wet rag after giving you a noogie lmao. If you bargained really well, you could get him to play Zenless Zone Zero; dude would be a Billy Main. Also probably beats your ass in Tekken, so you bribe beg Damian to step in as proxy.
Because I play Hoyogames (and because you can co-op with up to three people in Genshin), I imagine Damian would also play with you. Being a child (despite being an assassin,) he'd definitely pick the opposite of whatever player character you choose. You chose Stelle? He gets Caelus. You choose Aether? He gets Lumine. You choose Belle? He chooses Wise. It's a comforting, smile-bringing thought to him, that you are siblings even inside fictional worlds. Any playable character with a canonical sibling that you get? He's getting the other pair. It'd be cute, except his team comps get messy, so you run it through tests. (All according to his plan, heheh.)
Cass is one step ahead of everyone and was probably the one to suss out your gaming hobby. She spots your collection of Visual Novels, and puts it to good practice to watch and read with you. Would probably enjoy VNs like Doki Doki Literature Club. Probably would also play Dungeon Exploration RPGs like Momodora and Momodora: Reverie Under the Moonlight. Has the uncanny ability to never get lost in game dungeons. Stuck in an area? Cass is on the case!
Bruce frowns upon too much gaming, so he regulates your game hours (and has a timetable for everyone) regarding which game to play. Alfred also enforces it. So does Barbara. You do get to wheedle him into playing Pokémon Sword or Shield with a bit of begging and "Look Dada, I named my Crobat after you!" watch him soften when he googles and sees that Crobat only evolves after maximum friendship levels. He might like psychological thriller mystery pointer games that can be played in increments like Fran Bow, maybe? And battle royale games like Tekken: Bruce has a competitive streak a mile wide and will not go easy on you. Is very smug upon winning. If you get him as a proxy in Tekken, Jason will bolt because he will not be betting about staying over for dinner. The match would be rigged in Bruce's favor anyway.
Barbara on the other hand, loves hack and slash games. Get her to play HADES and compete on who has the fastest runs, and she will take up the next few hours of the game time schedule, much to her smug delight. She'd also love the atmosphere of the indie RPG Horror Ib, I think? The whole surreal, comfortable horror interspersed with time limit puzzles really does get adrenaline flowing after all. Gets very alert when playing Chilla's Art games and side-scrollers like Tsugunohi. Subtle horror is very much up her alley.
All in all, isn't this quite a comfortable life? A bit lonely perhaps, you could say, but with a family who loves you above all else and endless games, what else could you need?
Stay with them.
They'll die without you, after all.
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gossippool · 1 month ago
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what do you recommend for people who are very new to deadpool comics and looking to get into them?
hiii thank u for asking!! this is kind of a complicated question because there's no right answer really. especially with deadpool, there's no actual best starting point because besides the basic origin story that he was experimented on, everything else about him is fair game (he just lies all the time and has false memories about his past) and so all the comics are different and pretty much standalones. but here's a list of a few comics depending on what you want to explore (i have not read every deadpool comic ever so this is not the best list but i will get there):
for shorter and more lighthearted reads:
deadpool (2022)—SO so cute wade has a crush on this non-binary assassin and it's actually adorable how much he likes them lol. in terms of shorter deadpool comics i think this one is quite a standout
deadpool infinity comic (2021)—a short partnership with sue storm. funny and the art style is so cute too
dogpool infinity comic (2024)—this is just cute and logan is in it too
deadpool (2018) #6—the issues in this run are all kinda standalone stories (although they all connect at the end). they're all a fun time but this issue in particular is hilarious. comics usually don't make me actually laugh but this one did
for a more meta read that explores exactly what makes wade unique from other superheroes:
deadpool kills the marvel universe (2011)—in my opinion THE most iconic deadpool run, i'm sure everyone's heard of it lmao. a little darker but hey cameos from every marvel character ever. this was the first deadpool comic i ever read and it was a good time
for a familiar face from deadpool and wolverine (for other specific familiar faces you could just search "deadpool vs [character]" and that comic would probably exist):
honestly just search "deadpool and wolverine" and you'll probably get the whole list but here are some i've read that are lovely:
deadpool & wolverine: wwiii (2024)
deadpool vs. wolverine: slash 'em up infinity comic (2024)
for long in-depth characterisation that explores a lot of deadpool lore:
deadpool (2012)—if you've been following me you might know this is my favourite deadpool comic ever. it's pretty depressing and much grittier than the movie deadpool you might be used to, also REALLY long so it can be daunting but it's very worth it imo. it starts to get really good by the good, the bad, and the ugly issue and there's just SO much in it. for me wade in this run is inseparable from wade as a character to me (this comic is also followed up with deadpool (2015) and despicable deadpool (2017). they're not necessary to read but it's definitely bittersweet to get to the end)
deadpool (1997)—another hulk of a comic run. i have not read this yet but i've heard very good things about it, and many people say that joe kelly is the defining deadpool writer so you could give it a go! older comics may be a little harder to read though, from experience
a lot of comics will sometimes redirect you to other comics that explore a sideplot, and the main comic will just pick up where those left off so you could miss some storyline. despite this it's not necessary to read those other comics, but if you want to avoid multiple instances of this when you first go in, then i would suggest starting with the shorter runs!!
i hope this was helpful lmao sorry this got really long but i think the starting point really is different for everyone depending on what they like
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exercise-of-trust · 2 months ago
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everyone clap and cheer for my beautiful daughter who has every disease 🥰 her name is þerindë because her wheel is made out of an embroidery hoop; she is entirely handmade and boy howdy does it show
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a whole bunch of things have stopped working since i took that video last night and i'm not sure how much more wherewithal i have to keep messing with her, but i did manage to spin about two feet of something before then! so i'm showing her off a bit now, and if i can figure out what-all i fucked up maybe you'll see more of her in the future. some process and progress photos under the cut (not a tutorial. do not do this. i cannot sufficiently stress how bad of an idea this was and is*)
(*if you are going to do this and have questions not answered here i am always happy to answer them, inbox and dms are open etc, but like. i would strongly advise against it)
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here's the hoop! it's about a foot across, with a groove carved out with a speedball. this ended up being way too shallow (who'd'a'thunk) so the final version is a lot deeper than what you're seeing here. the paint stirrers are held in with straight pins because i was worried regular nails would just crack the hoop lmao. my girl is so deeply and profoundly scuffed <3
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the flyer is made from three cedar shingles glued together because i didn't have a solid piece of wood large enough. astonishingly nothing broke while i was sawing out the rough shape and it whittled down pretty nicely! the hooks are scrap 2mm copper wire, the orfice is a couple inches of plastic drinking straw, and the pulley wheel is also hand-carved, which is why it looks like a fucked-up oreo and has the weird hitch at the top of the spin that you probably saw in the video 🙃 frankly i am astonished it works as well as it does
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the wheel frame is. man. the axle supports haven't broken yet but frankly it's a miracle they're still in place with how much strain they're under every time. the original base was that weird little bit of paint stirrer, which (shocker) did not work out in the long run; it's been replaced by an offcut from the frame and is significantly more sturdy now. it's surprisingly level, though, and turns pretty smoothly all things considered!
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the frame was a nightmare start to finish; i've never done any serious woodworking before in my life and the whole thing was just kind of slapped together without a plan or any sort of concrete measurement. it wobbles so fucking bad and every few hours i have to push a couple of the parts back together where the nails are sort of drifting out of the wood. you may observe a weird post sticking out the left side of the mother-of-all; that is supposed to be for scotch tensioning. does it actually do that? sort of! the belt is a length of cotton crochet thread that is, after much fiddling, just the right size to not slip out more than once every three minutes.
treadling was another pain to figure out and i think i probably made it way more complicated than it needed to be. it still doesn't work very well and i can't tell if that's something i can fix hardware-wise or if i just have to suck it up and practice a lot more. turns out feet are not as coordinated as hands! i would say "now i know for next time!" but frankly i am never doing this again. you couldn't pay me. speaking of which, i did the math and at my current pre-tax hourly salary i could've bought two brand-new ashford travelers with the number of hours i spent building my awful rickety daughter. at the end of the day, do i love her? immensely. is she "good"? by no stretch of the imagination.
anyway. this was a terrible use of my time <3 but i do finally feel confident enough in all the parts of a spinning wheel and what they're for that i can brave the dangers of facebook marketplace's "spinning wheel" category without getting too badly scammed! which is pretty valuable in its own right, i guess.
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zqmbiescorpse · 1 year ago
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THE MORNING AFTER THE LAST
lottie matthews x female reader
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a/n: i used the word 'homosexual' once and every time i see it i giggle a bit, so if it feels out of place for you it felt out of place for me too lmao
summary: you and lottie have always been suspiciously close for best friends. one night at a party, the feelings finally surface. the only thing left to complicate the situation is a plane crash and a possession.
warnings: alcohol, smoking, brief mentions of homophobia, kissing, sexual tension, suggestive themes, possession, minor depictions of violence (like once i think)
word count: 5.6k
(masterlist)
Your head pounded rhythmically, in time with the pulsating music blaring all around you; the consequence of partying in the middle of nowhere with an abundance of alcohol. By some miracle, you and your team had made it to nationals and were due to fly to Seattle the following morning, so naturally, every member of the Yellowjackets could be found here, either drunk or high - in hindsight, it was not the best idea, but you were teenagers, a lame excuse for the fact that you'd get up to some stupid shit. 
If you'd had a mind of your own and had refused to succumb to the pressures of high school, you would most likely be at home now, snuggled up in the warm comfort of your own bed, attempting to fall asleep since tomorrow was going to be very busy for you. Without a doubt, as much sleep as possible would have prepared you for the day, even if you were kept awake for a little while due to an overwhelming anxiety and excitement gathering in the pit of your stomach, like butterflies were congregating to flutter around down there. 
However, you were currently standing propped up against someone's car. You didn't know whose it was, just that it was oddly parked in the middle of the party, surrounded by towering trees and irresponsible youth. Either way, it provided you with something to lean on, eliminating the need to hold yourself up while you slumped against it - red plastic cup in hand, you occasionally sipped the cheap alcohol, the flavour reminiscent of metal, bitter and sour, burning the back of your throat as you slowly swallowed it until there was nothing left. 
Why were you here then? You'd find yourself pondering that question every other moment of the night, each time, your brain would trigger a similar answer and you'd suddenly be fine with the atmosphere again. The social gathering was merely a non-suspicious justification to spend time with Lottie, who was off scrounging for more beer to supply the both of you with. It hadn't been long, a few minutes max, though, you still wished she'd hurry up and come back. You weren't really invested in conversing with any other members of your team, or anyone else here that attended your school for that matter - leaving you awkwardly awaiting Lottie's return. 
This didn't automatically mean that you disliked the people you would play the sport with, you did like a large majority of them and they were your closest friends. You weren't a loner, despite your lack of socialising at that moment which suggested otherwise; everyone else seemed to be scattered about, maybe in pairs or threes, moseying around with their own designated companion. You'd even catch glimpses of some of the girls kissing random guys, undoubtedly sparking trouble and unwanted romantic drama. You didn't want to be part of it. Ultimately, you were quite content with reducing yourself to clinging to Lottie's side, as you typically did.
The girl was witty, and cleverly humorous despite the fact that she was more subtle than harsh, never getting in anyone’s face or poking unnecessary fun at an oblivious target. She wasn't mean, bearing no intent to harm or cause trouble. Aside from her stunning looks and adorably gorgeous face, her genuine friendliness, sarcastic nature, and intelligence only ever intensified your infatuation with her. In addition, Lottie was incredible at what she did, her footwork being the cleanest on the team - how could you not admire her? 
At times, it frustrated you to no end, considering the world you lived in, people would avoid homosexuals like the plague, meaning you had precisely zero people to talk to about your troubles. You'd attempted to dismiss such feelings for your best friend, however, each instance proved useless.
Creating distance between the pair of you failed miserablely, for starters, the image of you and Lottie Matthews being miles apart caused eyebrows to raise immediately - purposely avoiding her made you feel deflated while it drastically upset her. It was inhumane to do that to someone, especially someone so special to you, therefore, that plan was scrapped within minutes. Besides, you played soccer together for your school, it was only a matter of time before you'd be attached at the hip again. 
'Newbie' was not the correct term for you, regarding your experiences with the team, nevertheless, you couldn't help but question your own utility. Although you could never exactly pinpoint why you were valued so much, apparently everyone else thought you were a spectacular asset and essential if they had any hope of winning Nationals. You disagreed. 
On the other hand, Lottie acted like she was your personal hype woman, constantly drowning you in praises throughout every second of every game. Those things got under your skin, in the best way possible. It was a miracle that your performance didn't waver when she'd encourage you with such charming words, blushing and fumbling after every compliment. 
You watched the brunette make her way toward you, a new batch of murky liquid in her hands, your heart a flutter at the mere sight of her. Lottie stumbled across the bumpy terrain, careful of the mud to prevent a fall, yet, she didn't hesitate to raise an arm excitedly to greet you. You smiled, shyly returning the wave. 
"Jesus Christ, what idiot chose here of all places to have a party!" Lottie giggled, slipping the new cup of alcohol into your old, empty one. 
"I have no idea, we kinda just show up, no questions asked," Your response was nonchalant, "Oh, thank you, by the way, for the drink," You quickly added on, eager to show your gratitude, even if it was over something minor. 
"What?" She stared, wide-eyed, struggling to hear you over the booming beats of whatever shitty song was playing. 
"I was just saying thank you for the beer!" Somewhat slurring your words, you began to shout, ensuring that you wouldn't need to repeat yourself again. 
"Yeah, of course! It's no problem!" 
Neither of you was severely intoxicated, at best it was more of a faint buzz guiding your bodies closer. The proximity gradually narrowed - there was not much hesitation as you were too busy caught up in the pointless, drunken conversation flowing between you and her. 
Equally giddy, you became progressively needy, hanging onto every word she spoke, whereas Lottie continuously rambled on about everything and nothing, informing you about insignificant details; a vast grin plastered to her face. Out of all the Yellowjackets, it was obvious that you and Lottie had consumed the most alcohol, the image of you together - fairly isolated from everyone else though still in view of anyone sober enough to care - her free hand lazily played with the ends of your hair and you gazed up at her wearing a toothy grin. 
Although it was strange for her to publicly display physical affection for you, the action didn't linger on your mind due to the woozy atmosphere. The man-made peace surrounding you, created by the beer, was soon broken by a few incoherent voices quarrelling suddenly. 
"You're a fucking sociopath!" 
Lottie, instantly detecting where the commotion was coming from, followed the sound of arguing. You trailed behind her, also eager to see some excitement.
"That was Shauna, right?" You inquired, cracking up at the idea of Shauna of all people getting into it with someone else, she was definitely not the type to start trouble.
"Sounds like her," The taller girl delighted, "Look! There, with Taissa."
You and Lottie merged with the congregation of people intensely monitoring Shauna and Taissa as they bickered back and forth about an incident that had occurred prematurely. Van had evidently been tangled up in the crossfire, the poor girl trying her hardest to separate her agitated teammates. You momentarily realised the situation was because of the gruesome injury inflicted on Allie, having been present when her flesh was ripped off her leg and her kneecap smashed. 
"I don't need you to defend me? Last time I checked you were totally fine with the whole 'freeze her out' strategy," Nat, feeling targeted, counted herself into the dispute, "I don't know why you two decided to come over here and just laugh when you were very much involved too?"
Her attention focused on you and Lottie, pointing fingers, exaggerating your amusement that had washed over with concern long before it had been mentioned, and hearing everyone shout at each other conveyed the seriousness of the situation plenty.
"Hey, what? We're not laughing?" Lottie defensively piped up, "I even said that I was unsure about it! How was I supposed to know that Tai would take it that far!"
Natalie shook her head, unimpressed with Lottie, instead, aggressively addressing you now. You hadn't spoken a single word, yet, the terror that shot through your veins was indescribable.
"What's your excuse? Apart from the fact that you go along with anything Lottie does," The blonde condescended.
"Fuck off Natalie, I didn't do anything. I didn't bust her leg and ruin her chances at playing sport," You quipped back at the unwanted blame, humiliated at whatever she was trying to hint at concerning Lottie.
"Bull. Shit."
Many negligible disagreements erupted violently inside the once collective dispute, drawing attention to you and your group. The volume was out of control, girls verbally attacking one another over nothing, arguing for argument's sake.
Due to the commotion, you started to attract bystanders, which in turn, alerted a very annoyed Jackie. She stopped what she was doing and promptly stomped over, disappointed and desperate to defuse the situation. Stern words from the girl with honey-coloured hair swiftly lead the fighting members of the Yellowjackets into a clearing, isolated from the party's intense atmosphere. 
You suppressed a groan at the suggested team-bonding activity, not particularly thrilled to forcibly compliment them at Jackie's request. Originally mimicking a military lineup, everyone disassembled from the formation and awkwardly approached each other, mumbling positive affirmations.
You were fortunate enough to be right next to Lottie, the taller girl swivelling around to meet your smaller self. She was without a drink, likely thrown it away before arriving at the new destination - in its place was a freshly lit cigarette. The crisp air dancing across your bodies sobered you up a bit, although not completely, you still felt more capable of thinking straight. 
There were millions of compliments you could've shower the beautiful brunette with, deciding what to actually say was a challenge. Taking drags of the cigarette and blowing the smoke in your general direction, because Lottie knew how it would make you blush, she peered down at you expectedly, awaiting an answer. Alternatively, she could've just taken the lead but didn't, for reasons you couldn't figure out.
"Jackie seriously couldn't think of anything better to fix our problems," You offered, seriously unsure about what to say to her. Lottie certainly wasn't going to let it go, yet the issue of accidentally being too forward and implying your romantic feelings for her was a looming threat that held you back. 
"What is it, not got anything nice to say to me?" She mused, smirking. 
"I admire your commitment to sport and…" You cut yourself off. 
"And what?" 
A strangled chuckle left your tightening throat, leaving Lottie amused. 
"I don't know, well, I was gonna say something like…you're a really great friend to me."
For a millisecond, you considered coming out with the truth and telling her how pretty she was. Ultimately, you fumbled and quickly covered it up, though you couldn't shake the feeling that Lottie knew how awfully you were lying. 
"Sure, you're a good friend to me too," she mocked, playfully jabbing her finger into your shoulder before returning the cigarette to her lips. 
This your eyes followed, trailing up until you inevitably met hers. You didn't know if it was because you'd gained confidence after the alcohol you'd had throughout the evening, or if you had internally decided to be more bold - forward with her - but you didn't want to look away. You couldn't look away. 
You noticed as Lottie's face changed from playful, to something more gentle, yet serious, like she had been suddenly whisked away in the same trance that had lured you into a daze. The ever-present background noise of the girls laughing and joking with each other danced happily around your ears, your subconscious pleased to hear your teammates having fun again. Though, you felt isolated from them, too focused on Lottie's plump lips and how they would part slightly, ready to say something, but freighted to do it. 
Her tanned skin glistened under the shine of the moon, creating something other-worldly out of someone who was already beyond ravishing. The distance between you shortened with each second, Lottie's hands were itching to reach out and pull you closer - you craved it. 
"Me and Shauna are gonna start heading back, get home safe!" 
The lust-filled atmosphere concealing you and her from the rest of the world crumbled, the interruption from Jackie announcing her and Shauna's exit brutally snapped the pair of you back into reality. There were a few awkward glances shared while you casually backed off from her. Nothing really happened; the fear of rejection crept in nonetheless, wondering if you'd overstepped her boundaries. 
Jackie and Shauana disappeared into a clearing, prompting many of the other girls to disperse and start to make their own way home.
"Are we leaving too?" You shyly asked, the tension from moments ago playing on your mind.
Lottie paused, considering her options thoroughly. She scanned the surrounding area, her face radiating an internal conflict so severe she couldn't have just been deciding whether she wanted to return home or stick around for a little longer.
“No. We’re staying.”
Her voice was fierce, a dangerous fire blazing in her eyes as she snatched your wrist and dragged you further within the trees, the taller girl guiding you to an unknown destination. You didn't complain nor protest. It was completely in the norm for her to do whatever she pleased with you trailing not too far behind. One could even say, you were totally whipped. She had your entire trust.
"Where are we going, Lottie?" You laughed nervously - that curious, giddy feeling back again.
"Away from everyone…just the two of us."
You couldn't determine her tone and you couldn't see her face. A silent blush tinted your cheeks. Was she messing with you? Was she purposely sounding so seductive? Did she know how hard your aching heart was pounding frantically against your chest?
The brunette came to a halt and you followed suit. Lottie finally spun around, meeting you face-to-face, her eyebrows were furrowed and her breath against your skin was unsteady, but it didn't stop her from grabbing your jaw and sloppily locking her lips with yours.
Tingles and hot flushes spread across your body due to the very sensation that was her mouth pressing bruisingly into your own. Any whimpers or whines you let slip as you reciprocated the passion she was gifting you, were shushed, Lottie taking the quickest of breaks from being attached to your lips to remind you to keep quiet made your insides melt - having the opposite effect, instead encouraging you to get more impatient.
She forcefully guided you backward until the rough bark of a tree was up against you, your hands clutched to her waist and your nails dug deeper because of this, earning a pleasured groan from the one who was basically on top of you. You could taste the liquor from earlier on her, she could taste it on you too. It didn't stop either of you from wildly exploring each other's mouths. 
Desperate to somehow be even closer to you, Lottie's weight smothered you, her height compared to yours left you with no chance of gaining control, but that wasn't an issue at all. Unintentionally, she lifted a leg for reasons only justifiable because of the positions you were in and the circumstances of a limited area, causing her knee to press into a certain spot between your shaking thighs. A moan slipped from your throat, louder than expected.
"Oh, my," Lottie chortled, taking a step back, "Did you like that?"
"Shut up and keep kissing me…please."
She obliged, buzzing with delight, the kisses slower at first, filled with love, the pace gradually picking up until you found yourselves similarly to where you were before: heated, messy, and running out of air.
-
The weight from your foot cautiously stepping up the rickety rungs of the old ladder made quite a racket, the wood rotting, similarly to the entire foundation of the cabin. It was a surprise that the structure was even suitable to live inside. Your designated pillow and blanket were slung over your arm, consequently, you struggled to make it to the top - climbing a ladder one-handed was not on your bingo card for this summer. Then again, neither was surviving a plane crash and having to live in Canada's brutal wilderness for an insufferable amount of time.
"What are you doing?" Taissa, who must have heard your endeavour, leaned over the entrance of the attic, "Here, I've got you."
The athlete assisted you with ease, collecting your belongings for you and placing them to the side so they would no longer be an inconvenience.
"Thank you, Tai," You nodded, briskly moving to set out a place to sleep, busying yourself in an attempt to avoid any questions you knew were about to come your way.
"Why are you up here?" 
"I just thought I'd support my friend, prove to everyone that there's nothing to be scared of and that the cabin isn't haunted…" You lied confidently.
"Right…If you were so sure, why did it take you this long to join me up here? I mean, I would appreciate it more if you displayed your so-called unity ten minutes ago? When I proposed the idea and got no response? You tryna make me look stupid?" Taissa quipped, mostly light-hearted, but you knew that she wasn't buying it - she was more bothered about getting the truth out of you than wasting time being annoyed.
You brushed it off with a laugh, kneeling down to fluff up your pillow and adjust the extremely thin blanket-crafted mattress. You relaxed yourself against it, now snuggled up on the floor. Taissa copied this, bringing herself to get comfortable next to you. 
"So are you going to tell me the actual reason why you chose to come sleep in this creepy attic?" She was relentless, never shutting up unless your response was satisfactory. "Shouldn't you be down there, with Lottie?" 
"What? What's that supposed to mean?" You choked, disappointed that she'd guessed part of your problem this early on.
"Oh c'mon, don't be like that, I'm only pointing out that it's unusual for you to be this far away from her. You and Lottie, not up each other's asses? That's unheard of," She smirked. 
"Okay, shouldn't you be down there with Van, then?" You mimicked the suggestive question, turning the suspicious homoerotic friendship allegations onto her this time. 
Taissa let out a sigh. Not because of you or anything that you'd said, rather, she missed her secret lover after mere minutes of separation.
"Van's too freaked out, she wanted to stay with the others," She spoke, deflated, the cheeky way of her words had disappeared, the reality of what you'd seen at the seance front and centre in her mind. 
"I'm terrified," You bluntly admitted, "I'm way too scared to be near her and I know how selfish it sounds but I can't do it. Lottie…she, well, she was fucking possessed!" 
After the party, you and her never spoke about the kiss. Things carried on between you as they normally would, thankfully, yet the memories of that night corrupted your every thought. You assumed that the plethora of alcohol you shared caused her to forget, which was still strange since you remembered it perfectly, but ignored it anyway. If she genuinely had no memory of it, that would probably be for the best; you'd hate to ruin your already-established friendship. 
However, over the past week subsequent to the crash, there was a minor difference in her that made it so the pair of you were somehow closer than before, this including physical closeness to one another. Hence, you were under the impression that she simply refused to mention the kiss due to reasons unknown. Possibly some variation of fear. 
Then, as her way of 'pulling her weight' to help the group adapt to their new life, Jackie cooks up an amazing idea to host a seance that, in turn, offers Lottie up to any available demons, her body becoming a vessel for the supernatural. 
It was horrifying. The delicate flicker of the candles had blown themselves out, ripping away any source of light; the room was filled with disorientated screams and panicked suggestions to make Lottie stop chanting - your 'sort-of girlfriend' had been repeating something demonic in French, successfully freaking everyone the fuck out. Vague translations had left the group mostly in the dark about what was happening, the only parts that were figured out included the spillage of blood and the demands of an unnatural being. 
The shock that struck you then stayed with you now, the thought of sleeping next to her was unbearable, thus explaining why you relocated to the attic to be with Taissa.
"It's okay to be scared, you know that, right?" She offered, trying to smile.
"I feel horrible though. I can't believe I just left her because I'm too much of a coward to face an issue that wasn't even her fault!" You fussed, grumbling into your hands to hide your face and the tears that were forming in your eyes. 
"Hey, it's not your fault either. I'm sure Lottie will understand if you spend one night away from her, with good reason might I add," A friendly chuckle strived to cheer you up, Tai shuffled up to you in case you needed to borrow her shoulder. 
"We kissed."
You don't know why you told her, you were planning on keeping it a secret, locking it away forever like the situation never even existed in the first place and was just another daydream, about your best friend, that nobody would ever know about. 
The girl beside you took in a shocked breath, "Shit…I kinda guessed that you weirdos liked each other a bit too much but oh my god I wasn't expecting that." 
"We've both been acting like nothing happened that night. Then this had to happen and make everything more complicated." You explained, slightly calmer than you had been a few moments ago. 
"Try not to worry about it. Get some rest, clear your mind, and talk to her about it tomorrow, okay? 
The suggestion had you nodding in agreement, what else could you really do at that point in time? You were in great need of an undisturbed rest and if you had to move away from the possessed culprit to do that then it was in your right to do so. You concluded that at the first chance you got throughout the busy, chore-filled day, you would go off and find Lottie. The idea made you anxious, nauseous even, but you couldn't avoid her and 'it' forever. 
When you finally awoke the next morning, the sun was beaming through the window, golden rays shining down on your face and painfully in your eyes - you rolled over to avoid it, only to discover that Taissa was already gone. 
It must've been later than usual since nobody besides Coach Scott could be found inside the cabin, everyone else had vacated it to carry out tasks, individually pitching in, which you were falling behind on due to the late start.
You recalled Shauna asking you to assist her with something, probably revolving meat rations. You weren't sure why she chose you of all people to help her with that stuff, but you supposed it was because you originally showed some willingness and then suddenly, you're dragged into it every time. 
Luckily, you spotted her immediately, stood around with Jackie, seemingly waiting for you. 
Apologies for unintentionally lying in came tumbling out of you, explaining how Taissa kindly forgot to wake you up. This earned you a hearty chuckle from Shauna who reassured you that it was okay, and that she knew you'd take a little longer as Tai had taken it upon herself to inform the group that you needed the extra rest. Feeling partially relieved, you followed Shauna into the forestry areas to the shed where the dead animals were kept - you didn't fail to notice Lottie's absence. 
As instructed, you thinly sliced the portions of raw meat for rationing; the blade smoothly cut through. It wouldn't be long until you'd run out of food again, the one deer unfortunately wasn't enough to sustain the group forever, hence, you'd rather not worry about it, the hunters were out doing all they could and you had to put some faith in them. 
Your mind drifted to Lottie, not a great decision since thinking about her was very distracting and you were wielding an extremely sharp knife - to accidentally slash your fingers while concentrating on her would be an amusing story for everyone else, not so funny for you however.
"Are you nearly finished?" Shauna checked up on your progress, peeking over your shoulder. 
"Pretty much, yeah," You murmured, preoccupied, "Hey, have you seen Lottie this morning? I'm just curious since she wasn't around the cabin."
"Yeah I saw her, it wasn't for long," She recalled, "Laura Lee took her to the lake. You know, after the seance and everything…she's been acting really weird."
Having finished your task, you placed the knife down and rested your palms against the rigid table, then said, "I don't know how I'm realising it now but, something has been wrong with her for a fair few days. We haven't brought any attention to it, is all. 
With a dirtied rag, Shauna wiped the blood off her hands and urged you to do the same. 
"Maybe keep an eye on her if it makes you feel better. I think we've all been acting reasonably different." She replied, wanting to keep the hopes high, this you appreciated, giving her a small nod as she gathered up the meat and took it away to be stored. 
You sighed deeply and shut your eyes tight, focusing on nothing, ensuring that your head was clear. The heat alone, out there in the wild, made you feel exhausted.
Stretching your back, you heard a faint rustle from no more than a metre or two away. Expertly scanning the surrounding area, you were ready to snatch the weapon up from the table and call for backup. If you were lucky, this could've been your next meal. Your mouth almost watered at the many possibilities of which animal would come into your vicinity without a single clue in the world of what their fate would be. The low grumble in your stomach grew. 
Emerging from the trees, you quickly learnt that it wasn't an animal at all, it was Lottie; her hair had been wet but was gradually drying, some of the strands still clinging to her face, and the t-shirt she was wearing had a few damp patches splattered about. 
Abruptly feeling awkward, you met her eyes sheepishly, waiting patiently for her to break the silence. 
"Is now a bad time?" She carefully questioned you, her hands joined together in a  nervous clump. 
"Not at all," You uttered, feigning confidence when you were actually as equally anxious as she was. 
"Can we talk?" 
You had no objections, having been patient all day, awaiting an opportunity to set things straight with Lottie. Trailing behind her into the woods, you thought back to the party, the way she was leading you to a secluded area so the pair of you could be isolated, it was a direct parallel to that night that seemed a lifetime ago, the night where you had hopes that your relationship might have progressed. 
"Is everything okay, Lot?" You gently asked.
"Where were you last night?" The taller girl decided you'd walked far enough and that this spot behind the cabin was suitable to converse, thus she stopped, "I woke up and you weren't there." 
"I went to the attic."
"Why?"
There was no use in lying, it wouldn't benefit neither you nor Lottie, the excuse that you went up there for Tai, that you failed in convincing her, wouldn't make much sense anyway because the brunette had slept through the proposal. Plus, you just wanted to be honest. That's why you agreed to this in the first place. 
"I was scared of what happened to you," You admitted, the anxiety you felt after seeing her possessed came flooding back, distressing you all over again. 
Lottie paused, conjuring the perfect response. She didn't say anything - a small, understanding, but sad, nod was the best she could do. A harsh pang of guilt struck your lower body. 
"I'm sorry, leaving you like that was probably wrong and I shouldn't have done it, I didn't mean to upset you, Lot. I'm really sorry," You apologised sincerely, "I'm not freaked out anymore, maybe a bit on edge still but, you're better now, right?" 
You wondered if you sounded too whiny, your intention was to ensure that your best friend was okay, nothing else. 
Her big brown eyes swirled with confusion, she couldn't even tell herself if she had returned back to normal, her voice brimming with anxiety, she whispered, "Do you hate me for what happened?" 
"What, no! Of course not, I promise I don't hate you," You explained in a panic, absolutely heartbroken that you'd caused her to say such ridiculous things. 
"I don't just mean that," Lottie slowly spoke, testing the waters as she was concerned about approaching the upcoming admission, "The party too, we never talked about it."
To say you were astonished was an understatement. Lottie, someone who you thought had completely forgotten about the kiss, openly acknowledged the fact that it definitely happened.
"I didn't say anything because I didn't think that you remembered, or that you chose to ignore it. I could never hate you, especially because of something like that. It was amazing!" You exclaimed, red tinting your cheeks, joy spreading across your face. 
This same cheer infected Lottie, her frown lifting into a beautiful, more confident grin. 
"Yeah, it was good," She agreed, blushing furiously. 
Although she appeared happier, the furrow of her brow indicated that she remained slightly apprehensive, prompting you to inquire, "What is it, Lot?" 
"There's another problem, I think I've been seeing stuff and I don't know if it's real or not." The brunette troubled, shuffling around. 
"Like hallucinations? Visions?" 
"Visions. I went to the lake earlier, with Laura Lee, and she dunked me under the water - and I ended up in a candle-lit room and then I saw an explosion and… I don't know what's happening to me," She rambled on, her eyes pricking with tears. 
You reached out to her, firmly rubbing her shoulder for comfort, "You can talk to me about anything, I'm here for you."
"So, you'll believe me? Laura Lee does, but the others are cautious. You're the one that I need." Lottie's expression was solemn, entirely serious about the discussion you were having; her vulnerable side shining through. 
"I believe you and I trust you. I care about you so much, you know?" 
 Your attention was brought to the blossoming pink patches covering her face due to your honesty, the taller girl experiencing an overwhelming mixture of emotions, she launched herself into your open arms. You hugged her back, tightly, letting go wasn't something that you'd be doing anytime soon, the height difference when you'd have such drawn-out, warm embraces always succeeded in making you laugh. 
After an undetermined amount of time, you both instinctively pulled away simultaneously. You gazed up at her, body language oozing with love while you brushed her dark strands of hair out of her face. Lottie's tanned hand cupped your cheek, you could see that she was feeling the warmth radiating off of it, yet, it didn't humiliate you, it felt freeing. 
You leaned in close, pecking her soft lips once, then going back in for a second short, though, sickly sweet kiss. Lottie began to giggle - the melodic noise identical to the one you would hear in the Yellowjackets locker room after a long, tiring game, or when you and her exclusivity went around invested in your own dumb shenanigans. It had been a while since you'd heard it, your heart beating faster as a result. 
Her palm traced your skin until she arrived at your chin, tilting it upwards, accessing your mouth easier as she towered over you - this kiss was not a short peck. It wasn't a sloppy, heated mess either, rather, it was slow and filled to the brim with affection. 
"So are we like a thing then?" Lottie beamed, remaining incredibly close to you with an indescribable bliss. 
"If you want things to be official, then I do too," You marvelled, mirroring her wide, toothy grin. 
You continued to pepper kissing all over each other's faces, showering your counterparts in affection. From there, things were appearing more positive; your hopes were high for the future.
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shikai-the-storyteller · 1 year ago
Text
The Federation, The Census Bureau, QSMP, Cucurucho, and Roier
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Something fishy is going on regarding Roier and the higher powers of the QSMP, and after chatting with @kasiobite, I've realized that things are a lot more complicated than we first thought.
We do know a few things though:
Roier considered Cucurucho a friend for a long time (he doesn't anymore after Bobby's death)
Cucurucho was, and has always been, very fond of Roier
Cucurucho seemed happiest when it was with Roier
Cucurucho does not always represent the QSMP. Sometimes, it specifically says it represents the Federation. (Are these two different forces on the Island?)
The most we've ever learned about Cucurucho has been when it's spoken with Roier
Roier has told Cucurucho he loved it
Roier thinks Cucurucho is being controlled by the Island / the Federation and wanted to help free it
The Cucurucho we knew at the beginning of the series and the Cucurucho we know now act differently. Many believe this is because it was punished for its feelings for Roier, and its memory was altered.
When describing Cucurucho to Bobby, Roier (who seems to understand Cucurucho best) said this:
"I think Cucurucho is sad. It's just that, I remember I used to hang out with him a lot when I first came to this Island. I hung out with him a lot. He always came to see me and help me. But from one moment to the next, I realize that he had changed. He stopped being so kind to me, and in fact he gave me a book. He had been telling me for many days that he was going to stop bothering me, it seems like he was scolded, but he acts like nothing's wrong. He acts like everything is fine, but I feel like they are forcing him. He's sad. He doesn't show it, but he wrote me a sad face."
Let's break down the details day by day:
[UPDATED: June 4]
Day 1 - 3 - Establishing a bond
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Since the beginning, Cucurucho had a very playful relationship with Roier. It enjoyed surprising / scaring Roier with its sudden appearance, and after a certain point, Roier began to expect Cucurucho's presence whenever he called it.
And sure enough, whenever Roier called it, Cucurucho came.
There's a lot of playful teasing between the two of them, and these first three days best exhibit Cucurucho's personality.
When Roier wanted to create a taco truck, he searched the Island for all the ingredients he needed, but had no luck finding tomatillo seeds. Cucurucho appears suddenly before him, and after whacking him on the head, it offers him... some tomato seeds.
Roier gets excited until he realizes what the seeds are, and when Cucurucho realizes its mistake, it digs itself a hole and jumps in. Cucurucho seems genuinely embarrassed by its mistake, and its the most expressive we've ever seen Cucurucho be.
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What's interesting is that, even outside of its interactions with Roier, Cucurucho's mind always seems to circle back to him.
On Day 3, Cucurucho hangs out with Mariana for 10 minutes in a cave before giving him a book that says "Tell me everything you know about Roier." (Note: this is completely unprompted by anything)
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Mariana, having absolutely zero sense of self-preservation, proceeds to tease Cucurucho about its crush on Roier so much it would put an entire class of Kindergarten children to shame.
Mariana: You like Roier, don't you? You like Roier man! You like him! Ohhhhhhhhh~!!! You like him!!!!
(He also asks Cucurucho if it wants Roier's number).
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Cucurucho then shoots and kills Mariana (lmao) but eventually does revive him. It seems to get frustrated when Mariana doesn't give it any information it deems "helpful" and starts digging pits and running back and forth. When Mariana asks what kind of information Cucurucho wants, it says "classified" and refuses to elaborate.
Day 4 - Last day with "our" Cucurucho
This is the first time we get a hint that there are multiple Cucuruchos [Timestamp 3h 52m]. Cucurucho appears in Roier's basement, and is also at the top of the stairs when Roier goes up, then back downstairs when Roier goes down. Roier is, understandably, a little freaked out, but he shakes it off pretty quickly. Cucurucho is a bit playful with Roier, and just… hangs out with him for no apparent reason. Roier even asks Cucurucho "Are you having a good time here?" and Cucurucho nods. Roier seems happy at the response, saying "this is your house."
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Roier gives him his first taco [Timestamp: 3h 56m], having made a deal with Cucurucho that he'd give it 10 tacos (and more) in exchange for one taco from Cucurucho. It hurts his feelings that Cucurucho doesn't have an enthusiastic reaction about the taco, and after he makes a huevo joke and Cucurucho shooting him then pretends like nothing happened, Roier feels really bad. Roier tells Cucurucho it can't treat him like this and pouts for a bit.
When he tries asking Cucurucho its name, it just responds with "no" and when Roier tries asking it why there are two of them, the upstairs one says "I don't know." Roier asks Cucurucho to let him go so he can get more materials to make more tacos, and Cucurucho tells him no.
While waiting for Cucurucho to finish writing him an answer via book, Roier gives Cucurucho back the amapola (poppy) it gave him earlier, pretending to spit at him because he's mad [Timestamp 3h 58m 50s]. Cucurucho hands him a book that says "Finish what I told you." They part ways with Roier (half-jokingly) saying, "You know what Osito Bimbo, you know what? I'm tired of you treating me badly. You and I are no longer friends," and dramatically logs out.
Day 5 - A Final Message
Roier logs in and immediately finds potted amopola (poppies) in his house. At the top of the stairs is another singular amapola, two tacos, and this book:
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Translation: 0037. Through this I want to express my most sincere apologies for treating you as a slave. We are sorry for any discomfort I may have caused you. We hope you continue to enjoy the island at its best. You won't see me, but I will see you. Best regards, Federal QSMP Commission
There are a few things weird with this message, namely the fact that it's signed by the Federal QSMP Commission, and the use of "I" vs "We" in several places (though I chock that up to translation inconsistencies, so YMMV).
I briefly wondered what the significance of 0037 was before I remembered that was Roier's ticket number.
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Why refer to him by a number instead of a name? Does this confirm that they're all part of an experiment?
Anyways, Roier says, "No! No!!! I want to keep seeing you Osito!" and responds to that message with this:
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Translation: Hello my dear Osito Bimbo :) I like you, please keep showing up. And that's all, uwu
As far as I'm aware, none of the books from Osito Bimbo up until this point used smiley-faces, but after this, Cucurucho started using them in some of its books. Did it learn that from Roier?
(To give you a timeframe reference for where we are: this same day, Roier is later betrayed by Spreen and Quackity. In one fell swoop, Roier lost many of the people he cared about, and who cared about him, all in one day.)
Day 6
[Timestamp 2h 32m] Quackity says he doesn't want to give any spoilers, but he warns Fit, Vegetta, and Roier to be careful around Cucurucho.
Day 10 - Cucurucho is back, but isn't the same
[Timestamp: 2h 12m 30s] At the adoption center (where Mariana is trying to comfort JuanaFlippa, who says she wants a new family) Roier sees Osito Bimbo spying on them and chases after it, but it vanishes.
Later, while Roier is with Jaiden, he tells her there's more than one Cucurucho, then sees Cucurucho standing on top of one of the buildings near spawn / the wall. Roier tells Cucurucho, "Come here! I missed you!" Cucurucho doesn't come. For whatever reason, Jaiden can't see it. Roier says to Cucurucho, "Ok, well maybe later I can see you in my house. You are going to come, because I know you! I know you like the back of my hand" (Cucurucho shakes its head "no" at this)
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[Timestamp 2h 59m] After Roier and Jaiden put Bobby to bed and Jaiden logs out, Roier does a few laps around the castle while talking to Chat. When he comes back a few minutes later, he finds the entry to Bobby's room blocked off and a sign in front of it that reads: "Don't touch your son."
Here's where things get interesting: for context, between this stream and the last time Roier streamed on the QSMP, Mariana and Slimecicle broke into Leonarda's house and misclicked the bed. Since then, a new rule was implemented on the server saying that if an Egg's bed breaks, they lose a life.
Was Cucurucho trying to warn Roier, and potentially save Bobby's life?
Anyways, Roier immediately breaks the blocks and runs upstairs to check on Bobby. He laughs, thinking Bobby is playing a prank on him, then realizes Bobby (and the admin) isn't logged in. He then asks, "Cucurucho?" out loud and starts looking around for it. Roier starts theorizing, saying no one can get through his door since he has a whitelist and only a few people can enter. He checks the house for any weakpoints that someone could sneak in through, but there are none, and he determines that Bobby is safe.
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Roier mentions that Cucurucho isn't acting like its usual self. When they do finally meet again in the castle courtyard, Cucurucho keeps its distance from him.
Roier: Well, I'm here, is there anything you want to ask me? I've seen you around, watching me. Do you want to know something about me?
Cucurucho: Classified.
Roier: Are you holding a book? Why haven't you visited me? Tell me.
Cucurucho: Classified
Roier: Ouch, now you don't want to tell me anything. Do you not like me anymore?
Cucurucho: ...
Roier: Do you not like me anymore? I thought we… I thought we were buddies.
Cucurucho: Maybe. I don't know.
[ A short time later, Roier starts singing a song and doing a little dance for Cucurucho ]
Roier: – And that's how it went. Huh? Don't you remember? How come you don't remember? Those were good times, when we spent time together! How come you don't remember? Remember!!!!
Cucurucho: I don't know (It repeats this several times)
Roier: No you DO know! Come down. First of all, come down. Why are you talking to me from up there? Come down, don't be so rude.
Cucurucho: No. (Repeated several times)
Roier: Come on, why not? Come! Are you jealous?* *(He says "Ta celoso", celoso is jealous and oso is bear, so he's making a pun)
Cucurucho: Enjoy the Island. (Turns to leave)
Roier: I do enjoy it a lot, Osito! Osito!
Roier runs after Cucurucho and confronts it yet again. Cucurucho gives him a book that has his ticket number in it, then tries to leave again.
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[Timestamp 3h 7m] Roier follows it, even digging to go underground with it to keep up, asking why it gave him a book with his train ticket number on it.
Roier: Stop playing a fool, where are you going? I won't stop following you
Cucurucho: [ Fires two warning shots on either side of Roier ]
Roier: What, are you going to kill me? Come on, kill me! Shoot me! Kill me! Murder me right here! Are you going to leave a child without a father? Are you going to leave Jaiden without a partner?
Cucurucho opts to run away, and Roier continues following it until it goes somewhere he can't (under lava) leaving him shouting, "You can't leave me like this!"
Day [ ? ]
I'm uncertain what day this happens, but someone pointed out this important conversation Roier has with Bobby around day 32. [CLIP]
Roier: Have you seen a white bear around?
Bobby: [ Wiggles to indicate "no" ]
Roier: You haven't seen him around… He's an old friend of mine, he's an old friend of mine. He could help us out with anything we need. I know I can count on him.
Day 32 - Love, Understanding, and Tenderness
[Timestamp 2h 39m] While they're in the castle, Bobby suddenly pulls out his gun and leads Roier outside. Roier asks what's wrong, then sees Cucurucho standing on the balcony above them.
[Timestamp 2h 41m] After messing around with his new stretchy tentacle gun that lets him Spider-man swing, he finally gets up to where Cucurucho is. Cucurucho greets him with a "Buenos Dias" then asks how Roier is doing. Roier says he's doing fine, then asks Cucurucho how it is and what its been doing.
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Cucurucho: I was informed you were looking for me.
Roier: Yes, that's right. Where were you all that time? Why did you stop talking to me? Why did you leave my life?
Cucurucho: Classified
Roier: Cucurucho, Cucurucho, Osito Bimbo, why did you stop talking to me?
[ Cucurucho hands him a book that says, "Do you need anything?" ]
Roier: Yes. What I need is love, understanding, and tenderness.
[Bobby punches him off the tower]
Roier: Anyways, I was saying –
Cucurucho: Observation.
Roier: Observation? Let's see, but did you leave because you had to, or did you leave because they made you? What happened?
Cucurucho: ...
Roier: I already know what happened, I know what happened. It was Mariana, Mariana bothered you and told you, "YOU LIKE ROIER you like him, you like Roier!" Right? Was that it?
Cucurucho: [ Turns away and hangs its head ]
Roier: Hey, yes or no? Tell me. You got trapped--
Cucurucho: Hahaha
Roier: What?
Cucurucho: Hahaha
Roier: [Laughs] What is that laugh? You're laughing to make the moment less awkward, right? This is a defense mechanism. "Hahaha."
Cucurucho: ...
Roier: Well, if you don't want to answer, that's fine. You don't send me WhatsApp or anything. You don't love me. We are no longer friends. [He starts to hop away, then turns back to see Cucurucho's response]
[Cucurucho hands him a book that says, "On this island there are many things to do."]
Roier: For example, that?
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[Roier moves to stand closer to Cucurucho, then Bobby knocks him off the tower again. Roier "Spider-man"s his way back up the tower, and he and Cucurucho are face to face again]
Cucurucho: Classified
Roier: What do you mean by that, what do you mean by that? Tell me! What is there to do here, what is there to do? Tell me.
Cucurucho hands him this book, which says: "We are preparing things for your enjoyment. Thank you very much for your patience."
Roier: Ok, but is that the reason you no longer speak with me? You're very busy?
Cucurucho: [Nods]
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Roier is concerned about Cucurucho's voice and asks if it's still able to say yes or no, and Cucurucho proves it can still say that. Roier asks Cucurucho if it needs to go and it says yes. Roier says: "You could stay with us and eat taquitos" drink Jamaica water or horchata if you like that more," and starts offering Cucurucho more and more food. Bobby falls off the building and Roier has to leave and go revive him, and Cucurucho again asks if he needs anything and apologizes for the inconvenience, saying its busy.
Roier: As I was telling you before, what I need is love, understanding, and tenderness. Do you have that?
Cucurucho: Hahaha
Roier: Why are you laughing? That makes you laugh?
[Cucurucho hands him a book that says Las Casualonas is on the other side of the Island]
Roier: [Laughing] But it's not that, there is that but it's not love.* Besides, I work there! I am Las Casualonas! I mean I can't go there because I'm the one who gives love, I'm the one who gives love, I'm the one who gives love and tenderness, but who gives it to me? Who gives me love? Tell me, who gives me love?
*(The phrasing on this is a bit weird but in essence, that's what he said here)
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[Bobby hits Roier again, wanting him to take them somewhere fun, and Cucurucho says, "Enjoy the Island" before leaving. Bad and Dapper have just arrived and are just hanging out, but follow Roier, who starts chasing Cucurucho, to watch the drama]
Roier: Osito, why are you leaving? Do you want to leave? If you want to leave, you can leave, if you don't love me anymore, it's ok. No it's ok, if you don't love me anymore, then leave. Leave.
[Roier momentarily glances back at Bad, who's just standing there just silently watching their private conversation while Dapper's taking photos like a weirdo]
Cucurucho hands him a book that says: "What are you talking about?" then starts fishing.
Roier: Don't be stupid, don't act like an idiot, if you don't love me anymore, you can go.
Cucurucho doesn't leave, continuing to fish until Bad gets closer, and it throws him the fishing pole then turns to leave.
Roier: (To Bad) Don't be such a gossip! (To Cucurucho) No no no! Well, if you want to go, go. I asked you to screw me, not fail me.*
*I have no idea how to translate this, it's slang so don't take it literally but I genuinely don't know how to translate that.
Cucurucho shoots Roier and leaves.
Day 34 - Who is the Host?
[Timestamp 3h 44m 30s] Roier talks to Bobby about Cucurucho, calling it his friend. He says he wants to talk to Cucurucho again and starts singing "Baby Come Back"
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Roier does a "ritual" trying to get Cucurucho to visit, and it (miraculously) works. Rainbow Cucurucho appears, and acts stranger than usual (which is saying something, considering this is Cucurucho we're talking about). This is their exchange [I'll add a clip later]:
Cucurucho: Good morning. What are you doing? We're from the QSMP Federation. It was reported that you were looking for me
Roier: I missed you! I was looking for you. I have a question Cucurucho, lately, I have seen people saying I work for the Federation. People are saying that I work for you. Cucurucho, you and I know-
Cucurucho: Hahaha
Roier: Exactly! You laugh because you and I are only friends, right, we are friends. [Long pause] …Right?
Cucurucho: I don't know.
Roier: Nah, you know, you know. Cucurucho, I don't know what you are, but you… you love me. You can't deny that. You love me: yes or no?
Cucurucho: Hahaha.
Roier: Nahhh no no no, Cucurucho, do you love me: yes or no? Do you love me? Yes or no? Wait- don't go Cucurucho- !
Cucurucho: No.
Roier: No?
Cucurucho: ...
Roier: Ok, Cucurucho. I have a question for you- I have a question for you. Let's see. If you don't like me, why do you come when I call you? If I'm not to your liking, why do you come? Every time I call, you answer. Tell me.
Cucurucho: ...
Roier: Cucuruchito, because I've known you since we first got here, I know you. There will be people who arrived a few days ago-
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Cucurucho: [ Hands him a book that says: IT IS THE DUTY OF A GOOD HOST. IF THEY CALL ME, IT IS MY DUTY TO COME. ]
Roier: How is that the duty of a good Host? You are the Host? You are a Host? Host.... of a program show for children?
Cucurucho: [ Hands him a book that says: IT IS NOT NECESSARY TO DO RITUALS ]
Roier: Ok... then Cucurucho, Cucurucho, Cucurucho, then let's see- clarify something for me- [Cucurucho starts to build up and go away] Nononono don't go! Wait wait wait. What do you mean you are a Host? Are you a Host? By "Host" do you mean the presenter of a program? Or do you mean that you are the Host of the Island?
Cucurucho: ...
Roier: Cucurucho? I thought we were friends. I don't know. So you just come because I call you? Because- because you are a good host?
Cucurucho: [ Hands him a book that says: YOU WERE INVITED TO THE ISLAND. THAT'S RIGHT, A HOST. ]
Roier: But Cucurucho, wait- wait wait wait- I mean, you say you are nothing but an asset? In other words, you are just active, because you don’t want to look bad to me? That’s why?
Cucurucho: [ Hands him a book that says: WE COME WHEN YOU NEED SOMETHING. TO THE GUESTS, I GIVE WHAT THEY DESERVE. ]
Roier: ...Ok. It's fine. It's fine, Cucurucho. It's fine. Ok, but but you told me you were the Host. Are you the host?
Cucurucho: Hahaha.
Roier: Ok Cucurucho. I won't bother you anymore. I just wanted to see you again, but now it's clear to me... that you don't like* me. You never liked me. You come because you don't want to look bad in front of me because you want to be a good Host -- or do you want to make the Host look good?
* Roier uses the word "querer" here which is more sentimental than just "like"
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Cucurucho: [ Hands him a book that says: WANT IS A TERM I DON'T KNOW ]
Roier: So… they force you? They force you? Are you being forced?
Cucurucho: Enjoy the Island. [Runs away]
Roier: [Runs after it ] Are they forcing you to come here?! Cucurucho, answer me! I love you! I appreciate you! Are they forcing you to do this? Do they force you to come? ...Are you a real person? Are you a person disguised as a bear?
Cucurucho: ...
Roier: Cucurucho?
Cucurucho: [ Hands him a book that says: YOU ARE THE ONE WHO FORCES ME TO COME. IF YOU NEED SOMETHING, IT IS MY DUTY. NOTHING ELSE. DO YOU NEED SOMETHING? ]
Roier: So when I need something from you, you'll come? Nothing more? Every time I need something, you come?
Cucurucho: [ Hands him a book that says: THOSE ARE THE INSTRUCTIONS OF THE HOST. THAT'S HOW IT IS. ]
Roier: Cucurucho, the truth is, I don't want to lie to you. I've been very sad. I think I want to leave the island. I feel very sad Cucurucho.
[Bobby punches Roier, and Roier shakes his head and holds a finger up to his lips, telling Bobby to be quiet]
Cucurucho: [ Hands him a book that says: WHAT IS MISSING ON THIS ISLAND THAT YOU NEED TO BE HAPPY? ]
Roier: I'm missing... I... need more friends.
Cucurucho: [Gestures at Badboyhalo and Dapper, who have been lurking trying to listen in on their conversation]
Roier: Them? Them as friends? But I don't like him, he smells like avocado. [Bad punches him] I want friends who don't smell like avocado, and who don't write so much!
Cucurucho: [Gives Roier a cockroach and tells him to enjoy the Island, then turns to leave]
Roier: Ok, ok, thank you. [Roier chases after Cucurucho] You have a nice day too! Nobody forces you to do what you don't want to do! You're free! Goodbye Osito Bimbo. [Osito Bimbo pauses as Roier is attacked by a zombie mob, hesitating until it sees he's ok] Goodbye!
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[Timestamp 3h 55m] Despite their farewells, Roier decides to follow Cucurucho more anyways to see where it goes.
[Timestamp 3h 57m 45s] Afterward, Roier and Bobby go home, and Roier tells Bobby (in a low voice to avoid anyone overhearing), "I think Cucurucho is sad. It's just that, I remember I used to hang out with him a lot when I first came to this Island. I hung out with him a lot. He always came to see me and help me. But from one moment to the next, I realize that he had changed. He stopped being so kind to me, and in fact he gave me a book. He had been telling me for many days that he was going to stop bothering me, it seems like he was scolded, but he acts like nothing's wrong. He acts like everything is fine, but I feel like they are forcing him. He's sad. He doesn't show it, but he wrote me a sad face."
Day 36 - The Federation takes Felps
[Timestamp 1h 16m] Cucurucho arrives at Roier's castle with half the server (all rainbow) in tow. Roier asks how Cucurucho is doing, and Cellbit confronts Cucurucho about the chainsaw incident, which Cucurucho denies happened. Roier intervenes, telling people not to fight. Maximus pulls Roier aside, telling him something strange is happening with Felps because he's acting like he's "Cucurucho's best friend", and Maximus wonders if he's being brainwashed.
Cucurucho spends this entire time giving people gifts acting harmless, until Cellbit intervenes again.
Cellbit: Roier, Roier, don't trust Cucurucho, he's a liar.
Roier: Why?
Cucurucho: Why?
Cellbit: Don't believe him. He tortured me with a chainsaw.
Roier: He tortured you? Ah, you did tell me. Cucurucho, is that true?
Cucurucho: [shakes its head] No
Cellbit: He's lying, he's lying! Guapito, believe me, believe me.
Roier: Ok, I believe you, gatinho, I believe you gatinho. [He repeats "I believe you" over and over]
Cellbit: Be careful around him, ok? He's a manipulator, a liar. Do not believe his lies!
[As Cellbit says this, Cucurucho hangs its head]
Roier: I knew him from a long time ago. And he was not always like that. He was good before. But I don't know. What happened to you?
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[Timestamp 1h 57m] Felps is taken by the Federation, and Cellbit, Maximus, and Roier confront Cucurucho, who laughs and says "I hope you enjoy the Island," offering them no answers.
[Timestamp 2h 8m 40s] Cellbit takes Roier and the other boys to the Theory Bros room, where they discuss the events from today and theories about Cucurucho]
Roier: Let me explain one thing. Cucurucho was very good to me. But then one day, he was very strange, you know? He was like… doing strange things, I don't know how to explain. But he was very good at the beginning, but then— he was like the Host.
Cellbit: Maybe at first he was really worried about making a good impression, and after that he started to let his guard down, and you caught him red-handed doing something weird.
Roier: Maybe the Host changed Cucurucho. I dunno, that's a theory.
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Day 37
The longer Roier hung out with Cellbit and the Theory Bros, the more his opinion of Cucurucho soured.
[Timestamp 3h 16m] After a chat with Richarlyson about his art skills, he asks him to draw Cucurucho, and they draw what they think it looks like together.
[Timestamp 3h 26m] They show off their finished artwork to Cellbit, and both he and Roier call it "The true face of Cucurucho." Roier's art is on the bottom, Richarlyson's is the one on top.
Roier: This person, this one here, is the true Cucurucho. The devil.
Cellbit: A demon of the apocalypse.
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Day 41 - Reviving Bobby
[Timestamp: 17m] Cucurucho visits Roier and Jaiden a few days after Bobby's death. It tells him to gather his friends to try and rescue Bobby, and gives him this book:
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[See it from Jaiden's POV]
Roier: I didn't lie to you. I told you I have new friends, I told you, and now they're all here.
Cucurucho: If you want to see [Bobby] again, there's a price to pay.
But they don't get Bobby back.
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Cucurucho: I told you. Everything has a price.
Roier: Was that the price? All those deaths?
Cucurucho: Yes :) […] There is a high price to pay when it comes to life and death. 10 minutes is the best I could get you.
In reality, they wound up getting 25. Realistically, this was probably just the admins feeling bad for Roier and Jaiden because frick dude, that was depressing, but if we want to give an in-universe explanation for it, Cucurucho might've given them more time.
Even so, Roier still vows he'll hold a trial against the Federation to try and get Bobby back.
Day 47 - A series of unfortunate events
I'm gonna TLDR this because so much happened on this day I'd recommend just watching the VOD, but essentially: Jaiden makes a deal with Cucurucho in the hopes that in return, they'll get something that will help protect the Eggs forever. Roier, distrustful of Cucurucho, stays close to keep an eye on things, and he has some back and forth interactions with Cucurucho that are reminiscent of their early day interactions, but are layered with sadness and mistrust.
Miscellaneous
Alright this post is getting long enough as it is, but let's run through some other oddities:
When Cellbit was trying to join the Federation, Cucurucho gave him a task that was specifically about Roier, asking him what he needs to be happy, why he's sad, and what would make him smile. Perhaps it's understandable that Cucurucho would be interested in one of the most depressed members of the Island, because the whole point of the Island is to make people happy, but considering their past friendship / relationship, detail of Cucurucho singling out Roier is something worth noting (particularly since it knows Cellbit is also close to Roier). Also idk, something about the way it's phrased as, "What would make him smile?" makes my heart ache
Cucurucho's task and Cellbit's answers:
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Other things of interest other people have brought up:
Roier (used to) keep all the books Cucurucho gave him in a chest
I should also note here that Cucurucho has always been kind to Jaiden as well. Despite terrifying her that first day, it also gave her a blue parrot. While Jaiden has always been cautious of Cucurucho, she's always been polite as well. When everyone went to save Bobby, she stopped to say thank you to Cucurucho (presumably thanking it for giving them the chance to save Bobby).
There's a lot I could say about Jaiden's interactions with Cucurucho, but if I did this post would be twice as long, so I'll have to save that for another day I'm afraid :'D
If there's anything I missed, please send it to me so I can add it here, or add it in the reblogs!
UPDATE: This thread compiles even more moments between Cucurucho and Roier and includes translated clips
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writingmeraki · 9 months ago
Text
unsaid, unkept, ugly emotions.
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a seventeen vocal unit imagines !
IN WHICH, the uglier side of feeling too much getting more messier than it already is for both parties involved.
(or in which for different reasons, it just seems you aren't meant to be.)
pairing : svt!vocal!unit! x gn!reader, bestfriend!jeonghan, popular!joshua, ???jihoon, fwb(?)seokmin, enemy!seungkwan.
genre : angst, no comfort, everything is messy.
warnings : cussing, messy, heartbreak, contemplation, arguements, miserable people, miscommunication, everyone gets hurt, a lot of unspoken feelings, like emphasis on that you may get annoyed.
author's note : here's my attempt at angsty feelings ( i hope it was done well enough, really i tried but it might not be for me )<3 the potential to turn each into a fic is there but for me it'll be zero ( for now!!!!) kinda nervous to post this haha it's my first svt work but also a first of this kind of work, let me know if you want more of the units! and what you thought of this :) also peep the cute colours contrasting the fic lmao
HIP HOP UNIT VER. | PERFORMANCE UNIT VER.
word count : 2.9k
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˖° ✰ ┆JEONGHAN.
The signs that something was wrong were there. For a while now. But you being the problem runner you were, you chose to ignore it.
You also knew one day they’ll catch up to you, and it seemed today was it. 
“Jeonghan?” 
He raised an eyebrow at you. Though it was his name, it sounded so foreign coming from you. 
You who never called him by his full name. It left a sour taste on his tongue as he answered,
“Yes?”
“Do-do you think we’re good?”
Did he think you were good? He was feeling good, great even. But you asked in plural and in the plural it included you. Your relationship.
What was your relationship?
“Uhh…I’m…I think?” 
You smiled at his answer. It didn’t reach your eyes, nor did it hide away the bitterness in them. “You know what I think? I don’t think we’re good. I think- I think it’s all a mess. It’s me, isn’t it? I should have never told you how I felt right?”
There. You ripped the band-aid off right from the wound. You had to, otherwise you knew your heart would be the one shattered, sooner or later, so why wait?
You knew there’d be consequences on confessing to your best friend. You knew there was always a risk to confess but the risk felt higher if it was someone you considered your best friend. A few sentences and it’s either having a stranger who you shared a past with or someone to create more memories for the rest of your time together. 
The issue gets more complicated when you don’t know where you stand. 
He couldn’t answer you, he didn’t know how to answer you. On one side, he wanted to yell at you. Yell at you for regretting confessing when it may have been the one thing he wanted to hear since the day thirteen year old him saw you beat up a guy who was bullying your brother.
On the other hand, he felt the fear consume him of the future, what if you broke up? You would never be the same, no matter what. He didn’t want to lose what he had, so he rather left it unanswered, thinking with time, it’ll fade away. Like everything does.
His feelings for you never did. A wonder how he could think yours would.
Taking a deep breath with your eyes shut,you nodded knowing your answer,
“Alright then I see.”
“Let’s take a break from each other.”
Break of what? You didn’t date, you were in a one-sided love scenario with your best friend. 
Before he could reply, he watched you walk away. Your heart felt heavier when you didn’t hear a single word or even footsteps follow you. 
His mind was the loudest and one thing he was for sure, as you walked away with each step, he could feel his heart slowly crack.
And just like that. It is over. 
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・₊ ‹𝟥 ┆JOSHUA.
Perhaps your biggest mistake was wanting someone who everyone wanted. But was it really your mistake because technically you were also part of everyone. 
You could feel his stare burn into your side as you ate the horrible cafeteria food in your college. You could somehow hear his voice, somehow know he was likely calling you to talk.
What went wrong?
Everything you’d answer if he ever asked. It began going downhill when you felt those feelings you knew you didn’t feel around anyone. Certainly when you hung out with Yeonjun or with Jimin, you didn’t feel them. 
You only felt them around him. The weird butterflies, the warm cheeks, the sweaty hands. At first you thought maybe you were actually scared of him, the intimidated type of scared. Who knew it ended up being scared of how you felt for him, how probably no one made you feel the way he did. 
Finally looking up at him, you hid all your emotions as best as you could. You certainly hoped he wouldn’t be able to know. 
But as your gaze fell to the girl beside him, you couldn’t hide them.
Choi Seora, the younger sister of Choi Seungcheol who was Joshua’s best friend since you could know. Well since that time he told you himself he knew the Choi siblings since they were kids. Childhood best friends. Knew them before you.
And she was also the girl who loved him. Anyone could see it from the way her eyes would look at him like the way one would at a treasure they’d been searching for. What she’d do for him, from what you’ve heard, what you’ve seen. There never was a chance.
It seemed as though the sign was already there. How could you compete with someone who knew him longer than you ever would? It’s not a competition if you already know you're losing. 
Your unused hand clenched under the table, nails digging into your palms, leaving crescent marks that would bruise. Perhaps it would be in a similar state to the bruise inside your chest.
It fucking sucked when you could still feel his gaze on you as you turned back to stare at your half eaten bowl of pasta. Well, excuse of a pasta.
Suddenly you felt your phone ring from beside your bowl and you knew who it was before you even looked.Without looking at the name, you moved your hand to the switch off button and shut it off.
You wished there was such a button for emotions. 
“Shua? Who are you calling?” It was empty in the cafeteria and you thought you might just puke out the pasta when you heard her sweetly call out to him as she looked at him with concern.
But for now, you’d do what seemed right. 
Leaving your bowl of uneaten pasta, you grabbed your bag and phone. With one glance at Joshua whose attention was on you but now turned back to Seungcheol and Seora as they said something, you walked away.
The last thing Joshua heard was the sound of the cafe doors closing and when he turned his attention back to what or specifically the one who had been in his mind since the first time he met, he found you were gone.
At that moment, Hong Joshua felt more miserable than he ever did before.
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₊✧ ┆JIHOON.
The lump in your throat got bigger as your vision got blurrier. You knew you should have listened to your friends.
Jihoon isn’t the type of person to be in a relationship with, babes, he doesn’t want that commitment stuff.
It’s what Karina had told you when you told her you were in love with him. Head over heels type.
But when it came to you, the determined type, the one who stood their place no matter what. The unwavering pebble in the ever-so drifting waves of the ocean. You believed that perhaps if you tried hard enough, surely the boy would see your efforts.
It wasn’t just a one-sided thing you knew. Otherwise another thing he was known for was being honest. If he didn’t like it, you were sure you’d have stopped. You didn’t think you were insane for thinking he may just like when you saw him smile at you for bringing him coffee. You didn’t think you were insane for thinking he may just reciprocate your feelings when you saw him hiding his face from complementing his work ethics. Perhaps, it was all in your lovesickness you drew these conclusions and many others. 
So where did you mess up?
“Fucking hell! Just leave me alone and stop acting like a clingy partner!” 
That’s what it got you. It was as though the words slapped you in the face. You surely did feel like it when you flinched taking a step back and your cheeks warmed in a mix of embarrassment as well as hurt. It wasn’t the kind of warmth that pleased you, it was the kind that burned you. Harshly so you felt it in your entire body.
Maybe it was your fault after all, you noticed he was having a bad day and you made the effort to go and comfort him. As you did. 
Maybe maybe maybe, always maybe your fault and always yours. 
Maybe you should listen to him then. 
Inhaling with what dignity you had left, picking up the pieces of your heart that seemed shattered the minute he finished the sentence, you glared at him and spat out words laced with an equally venomous tone.
“Fine then! You’re saying it's my fault but you know what, maybe everyone is bloody right about you! You’re nothing but a coward scared of commitment!”
“The day you’ll realize you’re nothing but a coward who gets scared at the mere thought of being in a relationship and pushes someone away because maybe there is a chance you like them, it’ll be too fucking late because guess what? I’m tired of this stupid push and pull game with you,Jihoon.” 
“Goodbye.”
You hated how your voice cracked when you finished speaking. You hated how you could not stop the tears. You especially hated the look on his face as he saw what he did, what his words did.
With what energy you had left in you, you turned around and walked away.
Enough was enough, you couldn’t win over someone’s heart who wasn’t even sure whose hands it should lay in. 
Yet one thing was sure, yours laid in his hands and right then, you sure felt like he crashed it into pieces. 
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♡₊˚ ┆ SEOKMIN.
Seokmin glowed like the moon solely rose up to soak in his light, like the stars twinkled off his radiance. Maybe,you just got too close to the sun, enchanted with its brightness, to not realize just how much it could burn you. He was your sun. No actually the sun,stars, moon whatever celestial body existed perhaps dimmed down compared to him. 
You think it messed you up completely when you kissed him in that truth or dare game surrounded by your mutual friends. You think about the stolen kisses, never more, just kisses in between the times you’d pass by in the hallways, pulling him in a cramped space and leaving with flushed cheeks and swollen lips. Again, just kissing. 
Simply put, you were addicted to him. To the way he made you feel. To the way he made you tingle when he kissed you so gently. 
You didn’t want to address the elephant in the room. Or in this case, 
What were you two?
Mingyu asked when you were sitting down in the same circle, just like the first time you’d kissed each other, with the same people. 
You hesitated and then said, uncharacteristically enthusiasm lacing your voice,
“Friends of course! Don't be ridiculous Gyu.”
You didn’t like that word, and it seemed he didn’t either as he looked away,gulping in distaste and a scoff on his face that was usually unnatural for the sunshine like a boy. Seemingly going unnoticed by you but said boy who asked the question noticed and glanced back at you to see if you noticed. He sighed when he saw you not looking at Seokmin but raised an eyebrow as he saw you in a dilemma. 
Right. Friends. Friends who kiss. But still friends…friends?
You tried convincing yourself the rest of that day that adding a label would ruin things. It always does. You should enjoy it while you can, right? It was all in fun?
So why did you feel terribly down when Seokmin refused to talk to you for the rest of the day?
“Seok?” You asked gently and he sighed exhaustingly as he looked at you,
“Please, please don’t…don’t call me that.”
The look of hurt on your face made him hate himself more because why would anyone like to hurt someone they loved?
Before you opened your mouth to speak, he continued,
“I don't think I can do this anymore, this…whatever this is. I am…sorry.”
And without a chance to ask more questions or give any answers, he turned around and walked away.
This was your fault. You hurt him because you couldn’t admit it to yourself that you…that you loved him. 
You loved him more than the universe, you loved him since the day you saw him. You were just scared you'll lose him like the way you lose all your loved ones. You were scared of risks. You were…a coward.
And now it seemed, it was too late to do anything about it.
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⠂୨୧ ˚.┆SEUNGKWAN.
Seungkwan and you were fire and water. Milk and lemons. Politicians and caring for the country’s people- Okay too far perhaps and enough of these metaphors of incompatibility to get a point.
You were sworn enemies. Despised each other in the true forms of hate. You hated him so much for the emotions he rose in you that you couldn’t stand him ruining another poor innocent soul with his devious eyes and cunning smile.
Which was exactly what he was doing with the girl wrapped around his left arm, additionally whispering probably lame jokes that made her giggle as though they were the funniest thing on earth. Lee Yuna was her name, you knew her as a cheerleader due to seeing her during your basketball games and also being somewhat acquainted because as a captain, it was apparently in your duty to know everyone especially those involved in the sports sector of your university.
You wish you could cross off knowing Seungkwan but alas, being the midfielder of the boys’ soccer team and the apparent star as well didn’t help in your case. 
“I smell something burning and oh! Would you look at that! It’s an ugly green color too!” Sakura said as she smirked at you, pretending to take a sip of her drink when you directed your glare at her. 
“Fuck. You.” 
“You wish-”
“Oh! hey cap!” A voice said before you could retort to Sakura and you turned to see Vernon smiling at you in greeting. You knew him, of course you knew all of Seungkwan’s little friend group. You frowned at him eyeing him in suspicion. He was Seungkwan’s friend after all.
“Why the frown?” Sakura snorted as he asked you,his attention going to your best friend before she pointed at him and it was as if he understood and nodded.
“Ohhh, I see what’s the matter now.”
“Someone’s” Coughing very fakely, he added, “Jealous.”
Shutting your eyes, you looked at him with a glare enough to make him shut up on his own but still you added,
“Say that again and I’ll-”
“Already giving death threats huh? Maybe you should really go check up on that stick up your ass.” Of fucking course, now is when he decided to show up.
As though his eyes had not been searching for you the moment he stepped in the party. As though he hadn’t noticed you the moment you did. As though it wasn’t just an elaborate plan to rile you up.
You looked at him and fuck. Fuck he made you so angry with how fucking good he looked despite the conditions of the party. His blonde hair shining in the colorful lights and the darn smirk on his face. 
“Kwan. How nice of you to show up! Just the person I was waiting for!” Your sarcasm could be sensed by those around, Sakura’s attempt at hiding her snort and Vernon’s brows raised not going unnoticed. They looked at each other briefly and a knowing look was exchanged.
Here we go again.
“Aw you were waiting for me darling?Hope I wasn’t too late, just got a little busy you see?”
“Clearly.” You said before thinking, the scowl on your face visible and the smugness on his face only grew larger.
“Not fond of me with someone else?” You didn’t even notice how both Vernon and Sakura had left, seemingly only Seungkwan and you, in the midst of drunk teenagers and perhaps lovesick ones, perhaps loners. 
He got closer, closer that made you clench your hands that hung on your sides, leaning down.
“Not fond of me with anyone but you?”
It was as though his voice put you in a trance, or maybe it was how his warm breath tickled your neck. And for the first time in a while you thought of what he said, deeper than you would have ever.
You weren’t sure if you liked the answer. Or what it exactly implied too.
“Stay in your limits Kwan. Don’t fucking- don’t play this shit with me.” You pushed him away as harshly as you could, even if it felt like your hands burned when you thought of what you did. Purposefully ignoring the look in his eyes. Visible hurt and a frown on his face, you turned around, having enough.
“Don’t come after me. Stay with Yuna or whoever, I don’t fucking care.” You don’t know why you said the last sentence. You also don’t want to know why it felt bitter saying it.
With that, you began to walk out, gulping the fresh air that was much needed after being in that suffocating place, suffocating feelings.
As you shut your eyes, you gulped thinking of what you were doing. Why were you so pissed off? 
And maybe you realized, you needed to check on the line that was drawn between Seungkwan and you. Perhaps it’s become too blurry to distinguish it from hatred and love.
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all written works as well as images and edits (unless credited) belong to pri. do not plagiarise, repost, re-edit or claim as yours. pics mostly found on pinterest.
writingmeraki Ⓒ 2024
feedback is always appreciated 💌
links : main navi ! | svt masterlist !
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fangirlofallthefanthings · 4 months ago
Note
heard you have headcanons on ody and dio meeting again after he returns. how does that go? how does penelope feel?
Ooooo!!! Boy, do I have ideas [insert shakey turtle of excitement here]
So, it's a little bit complicated, and I don't want to give too much away since it relates to what I'm currently working on, BUT!
I GOT YOU, FAM!
Basically: after Diomedes gets kicked out of Argos (it's very sad, the poor man), he realizes he has nowhere else to go except literally anywhere but the Eastern Mediterranean. So, he sets off for Hesperia (aka modern Italy) to start a new life there. But in this time of heartbreak, he's missing Odysseus even more (they had a sad goodbye on Crete; it's a long story), and he decides to stop at Ithaca on the way to get some supplies and maybe visit Ody. But when he gets there, he finds that Ody is MIA and Penelope is running things. So he hangs out for a while and gets to know Pen and Telemachus (who is about 11 or 12 by this point), and quickly figures out why Ody would talk about her literally any chance he got. She's beautiful, yes, but she's also just as cunning and wise as Odysseus is... The same qualities Dio fell in love with. And Pen is curious about Dio, too. She's heard many stories and news about her husband's schemes with Dio, and she starts falling for him a bit, too. But Diomedes doesn't want to dishonor the Bro Code by getting with Penelope. Ody loves Penelope! Dio could never hurt Ody like that. So... He leaves. He says goodbye to Pen and Telemachus and heads off to Hesperia. He and Penelope wonder what could have been since they believe they will never see each other again.
BUT THEN ODY RETURNS TO ITHACA!!! YIPPEE!!! Diomedes hears this news, but he has his new city to run, so he doesn't return immediately. After a few years, though, he gets usurped and kicked out again, so he's like, "Welp. I have nowhere else to go," and he goes back to Ithaca. He and Ody reunite and there's hugs all around and it's really sweet. Dio soon finds that OdyPen had another kid, a daughter (I haven't figured out a name for her yet, but she's two when Dio shows up). This part of the story is very loose, but I do know they all put two and two together eventually (Odysseus is very happy about this as you can imagine lmao!) It's little slice of life stuff from there. A little hc I have about the three of them is that Dio teaches OdyPen's daughter how to box because she's a little firecracker and needs to get rid of excess energy somehow, but she can't stay still long enough to weave (plus she's really little and doesn't have the fine motor skills for that yet). Dio and Ody also work together to hone Telemachus's and Diodotus's skills (who Diodotus is... you'll know soon enough lmao). I also hc that Pen frequently tricks OdyDio into wrestling each other so she can watch for her own entertainment. She's just sitting to the side, eating her bowl of table grapes, enjoying the show okasdfhsdugif- I also hc that... Once OdyPen passes on, Diomedes leaves again. The kids don't want him to go, but he can't stay. He wants to honor Ody's wish for Tele to be king. If he stays, people will think he wants to take over. He doesn't want a war among Ody's people so... he leaves. He establishes one last city in Hesperia and feels his life coming to a close. He climbs a nearby cliff by the sea to enjoy the view, looking east. Then Athena shows up, and he accepts immortality. Sorry... Got sort of sad toward the end there, but that's a few things! I have a lot of thoughts, but I'm very scattered rn. If you have more specific questions, feel free to ask! I don't bite, I promise! :D
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