#though it involves the very best girl and number one princess in our hearts

[king-of-wrath]

I feel bad for the artist(s) hired by Cartoon Beatbox Battles' Verbalase to make an animated music video featuring Charlie Morningstar and himself

They were approached for a commission from a fairly well-known Youtube personality, probably thinking this would be good exposure. The price was negotiated and the video was made---keeping true to Charlie's design from the pilot, animating her smoothly and with her lips synced to the lyrics, making colorful and detailed backgrounds---but because of how Verbalase got the money to pay for it, their name will go down in infamy just by association with him

I'm not aware of how it happened, but the allegation is that Verbalase had embezzled approximately $50,000 USD from his own company (which produced Cartoon Beatbox Battles' animations) to fund an unspecified "special project" of his. As the allegation goes, this theft essentially bankrupted the company to the point that they couldn't continue the Beatbox Battles series

People are criticizing Verbalase for basically sabotaging Beatbox Battles to indulge his self-insert ship fantasy with Charlie---and without showing the whole video, that's really the best way to describe what it was. The artist(s) did the job they were paid for, didn't judge the client's tastes and couldn't possibly have known the client was paying with stolen money, but people are mocking them and Verbalase in the same breath

[ohmotherwhereartthou-if]

I have a weird but hopefully adorable ask!

RO reaction to receiving the news that they or MC is pregnant with Octuplets?

(For Elio, MC brings 8 kids home and says these are our kids now :)

Woof, Lord have mercy!

Cassandra: When the doctor reported that there was more than 4 heart beats in there... Girly was lightheaded for hours trying to contemplate. You can bet top dollar after this you both are not ever having any more kids, this is the first and last time.

Valeria: Laughs. Laughs in disbelief and wonder, she didn't even think that was humanly possible. I mean, she is a twin herself to having two or even three in one go was plausible but...8? Good Lord grant her patience, because you two can kiss sleep goodbye.

Tomás: Nah, my man definitely passed out for a few moments. Goddamn, 8?! That's insane, normally he would take majority of the 9 months wrapping his head around being a dad, but now he's gotta come to grips he is having 8 in one go? Yikes.

On the plus side however, he would prep like a mf. 8 hand-made cradles and adjustments were made to the dining table to he could fit all 8 of the little ones into makeshift high chairs. He is literally making a blueprint of the house and trying to figure out how he is going to fit them all into their respective rooms when they are older. He kinda wishes he had more money so he could afford to give them all their own rooms, he would low key debate asking his mom for some money but his pride ultimately would not allow it. He settles on separating them by gender for now, it would be funny af if he got 7 boys and one girl though. Heavens know that girl would be a such a daddy's princess.

-

Ludovica: I worry more on her health tbh, she would worry the whole pregnancy that she would miscarry. So by the end she is so happy they arrived safely and healthy, she honestly would be very overwhelmed by the number of them though. Vica would benefit greatly from having a small family but she would not complain to have all 8. She might make a case that you guys need to hire a few nannies though, she would be very involved with all 8 of her kids but it is all a bit too much for her though.

Aurelio: The best one out of all the RO's that is fit for this situation. He would still 100% throw up upon receiving the news however, goodbye freedom. He would shape up quick and allocate many of his spare rooms in his manor for his kids, no more overnight stays for any party guests that is for sure. He would hire one nanny, aka a governess, for the kids so that he can work comfortably and MC can have some help. His kids will all turn out 100% like him, read that one other RO as parent's ask to see what I mean by that. The havoc these kids will cause on the denizens of Romandi are unspeakable, however I feel like the home life would look a lot like 'The Sound Of Music' (my absolute favorite comfort movie btw) but how the family is at the end. Constant trips, fun games, and a huge loving family. The kids would also probably be similar to those kids from that movie. Putting frogs in people that they don't like clothes lol.

Elio: I mean... He would have questions as to why you suddenly decided that your shared apartment sized home should now be an orphanage. My mans would be shook but also not turn them out, he would at first want to find them all proper homes but I can see he would quickly get attached. He does 100% MC to find or have a job to support all of these kids properly, he would help (by being a house husband) but it would fall mainly on MC to figure out how are you both going to take proper care of these kids in the long term.

[aclosetfan]

ask game number 10?

(ask game) thank you so much for asking!!!!

BUBBLE BAND ♥♥♥

YESSSS YESS haha yessss someone chose 10!!!!!! So pumped for this one. For new fandom members (lmao I’m like a damn fandom historian), battle of the band fics got really popular for half a second b/c of the punks. I outlined my own where the punks are included but with a twist. No powers au, multi chap fic.

My outline is really detailed because I know I’m going to be writing this one!! It’s just too much fun, but I’m only gonna give you the jist, I don’t want to spoil too much :))) I’ve got like six pages of notes and I’m still not done mapping it all out. It’s supposed to be goofy as well as a big s/o to everyone who watched cringy amvs on youtube in the early 2000s <3

BACKGROUND:

Brick (lead guitar), Butch (bass), and Boomer (drums) are three brothers with a shitty garage band. They think they’re hot shit. They’re not hot shit (not yet). They’re good at playing their instruments but they don’t have a big following (or any good songs). On a good night, Mojo (their adopted father) indulges them and brings the crowd to a stunning total of 1.

PLOT:

One day, Boomer gets it in his head that he doesn’t want to be a punk rocker anymore. It’s dumb, he’s bored, and obviously, he is the next Picasso, so he quits the band. Brick all but disowns him as a brother. Butch is like dude I’d be cool staying in the band and Brick goes “you don’t have a choice!” Butch is like “aight, but now that Boom’s gone, can we maybe play a song I wrote?” Brick’s like, “no!” Butch is like “aight. That’s fair it’s dumb anyway. No harm, no foul bro. How are we going to get a new drummer as good as Boomer?” Brick’s like, “we’ll find someone better!” They won’t because, to give credit where credit is due, Boomer is quite a good musician.

Butch is like well this still sucks though cause we just got all those t-shirts. Like we’re broke af and they’ve got Boomer plastered on the front of them too. We can’t just replace them. Brick’s like “we’ll find someone better and someone who looks like him nbd.”

Brick and Butch don’t know any other drummers and they certainly don’t know anyone who drums and also looks like Boomer, so they make flyers~  

“Annnd,” Brick chirped, grabbing the page from the printer, “done. There. Perfect. We just need to make like a thousand more of these and post them around the City.”

Butch yanked the flyer from his hand with a frown, his eyes jumping around it before he grimaced, “Man, I dunno.”

“What?”

“Must have blonde hair, blue eyes,” Butch looked up, “reads kinda neo-nazi-ish.”

Brick ripped the page from Butch with wide eyes, rereading the flyer. After a second he hissed, “Ah fuck. Fucking Boomer.”

“He ruins everything.” Butch solemnly agreed.

“Fascist can’t even be punk.” Brick huffed, glaring at the flyer.

Together they sat back in their chairs and regarded the flyer before turning their attention back to his cracked computer screen. After a few moments of hmm’ing and haa’ing, Brick snapped his fingers and leaned over his keyboard. He made the font big, bold, and red so it couldn’t be ignored at the bottom of the flyer:

‘CAN’T BE A FKING SKINHEAD’

“Dude,” Butch nodded, reading over his shoulder, “it’s beautiful.”

And then the boys post the flyers everywhere. Including their school, where most people ignore them regularly. Their flyers however become popular scratch paper for the art department where one Ms. Bubbles Utonium stumbles upon them. She takes it as a sign. She’s a bit of a drum hobbyist, but her dad has had enough of the racket and she needs to find a new place to play. She’s not practiced or anything, but she fits the four requirements to a “T”. She has blonde hair. She has blue eyes. She can play the drums. And she isn’t a skinhead! She thinks it’s silly they even had to clarify that. She’s not too into punk music but even she knows fascists can’t be punk! So on the day of auditions, she shows up with her drum sticks and gets in line!!

Brick and Butch are floored when Bubbles Utonium comes strutting in. They only know her because she’s a popular cheerleader at their school and shares an art class with Boomer, who only ever complains about the perky upbeat girl. Their first thought is to laugh, but when she starts playing, they’re like “oh?” She’s inexperienced, but she’s got a knack for it, and (as Butch points out) she is not a skinhead. Since she’s the best they’ve seen all day they offer her the position on the condition that she dresses like a dude when they play because of their t-shirt dilemma. She tells them that’s no problem, she likes playing dress-up, but they’ve got to work band practice around her cheer schedule. They agree.

The RowdyRuffs are a band once more.

Boomer btws is NOT AT ALL jealous. Not at ALL. Nope. (he totally is and he’s very obvious about it). In one of the early band practices that he barges in on to “check out the new drummer,” he’s ten shades of betrayed when he sees Bubbles of all people in his seat. He does not like Bubbles. Bubbles thinks Boomer is the bees-knees. He doesn’t like her because she’s good at just about everything he wants to be good at—except for drumming, which he proves then and there and is like “your new drummer sucks, later losers, you wish you still had me, by the way, dad wanted me to tell you he’s making tacos and they’ll be ready in ten.” Bubbles is not deterred by his behavior, thinks how he plays is really cool, and wants him to teach her, which he continuously refuses to do, but that doesn’t stop her from pestering him. (eventually, he does tho just a fyi; Bubbles is hard to resist)  

Jumping forward in time, Princess becomes involved as their PR manager and decided that Bubbles shouldn’t act as Boomer anymore. They need “horny old man money” and everyone’s like ooooh yeah, horny old man money, neat! So, in all her genius, Princess decides to make Bubbles “Brat.” And boom! Here’s our first powerpunk girl.

It’s a hit with the crowd that the band is slowly starting to amass. After accidentally hearing Butch goof around on his bass, Buttercup ((((Bubbles’ sister, who at the beginning of the story takes pity on Butch and Brick and volunteers to help teach her sister how to be “punk rock”. She is also forced to drive Bubbles to and from band practice (because Buttercup is being punished for failing math)))) encourages him to pitch his songwriting to the rest of the band. He refuses. Brick’s the guy who writes the songs, who’s very bad at it.

However, after another shitty song about some mystery girl Brick swears he doesn’t have a crush on, Bubbles has enough and assigns the boys some songwriting homework. Butch writes a banger and their little band gets more recognition. They’re now playing sizeable gigs, but wait! OH NO! Bubbles and Butch aren’t going to make it to the show on time. Boomer’s like, “shit Brick! The show must go on, dude, but where are you going to find two people who know how to play the exact same instruments as Butch/Bubs, know all their cues, and all the songs in the next ten minutes????” Brick looks at Buttercup (plays bass like Butch/almost at all the band practices/has a lovely voice despite what she says) and Boomer (who was Bubbles before Bubbles) and goes “huh, genius, I wonder.” Buttercup’s like “oh no, wait wait! I’ve got stage freight!” To which Brick says, “get over yourself and join my shitty fucking band!”  

And that’s how we get our Brute <3 (named by Brick). She’s a hit!

They just keep getting bigger and bigger as a band, and record labels are starting to take an interest, so after Brute debuts, everyone’s like welp, Brick needs his counterpart too. And it’s eventually Blossom, but that comes about in a roundabout way because Brick’s feelings are still hurt (she’s the girl he was crushing on, but she rejects him). Eventually, Bubs is like “listen, Brick, we need a Berserk (Butch name’s this imaginary person), and it's coming down to the wire. Blossom can do it. I know she can. It’s for the band.” So, he sucks it up and Blossom hesitantly accepts (she’s very much preppy pop to whatever Berserk is lol so it’s difficult for her at first). After a heart-to-heart with Brick, they make amends (I think I’ll leave it platonic for now tbh) and their first show altogether is a hit!

As always, there’s a happy ending :) They get their record deal lol.

I can’t write songs. I’m shit at poetry, but I was thinking about just choosing irl music and mashing them up, so the music is still “original” but people can also be like omg I remember that horrible song from my emo “phase.” I have to find a good song list first. If anyone’s still reading send me some recs. The music I like is too embarrassing.  

[colorseeingchick]

Oh Baby! A series (Sugawara x Fem!Reader)

Summary: Sugawara loves to play-hide-and-seek with your nieces and nephews, almost as much as he loves them. But this usually light game has real stakes when you, your brother, and your sister-in-law decide to get involved. What does Suga win in this special game? 

Warnings: Fluffy fluff, mentions of pregnancy 

Word Count: 4k

A/N: I have severe baby fever and time is a construct. This is on the longer end but I think its worth it :) Hope y’all enjoy! <3

Tired. That was the only possible way you could describe the way your husband looked as he stepped through the door of your brother’s home. His tie loose and shirt half untucked- he radiated exhaustion. But right here and right now, there’s something important that’s about to occur. And Sugawara Koushi would be at its forefront. 

“This is for you, Koushi-ojisan.” Your eldest niece, Tsubaki, bowed as she offered a folded piece of paper to your husband, who froze in the process of sluggishly sliding on his house slippers.

Suga shot you and your sister-in-law a questioning glance as he hesitantly received the piece of paper. Your sister-in-law feigned an innocent look, and you just shrugged your shoulders, pushing yourself to hold back your mischievous smirk. 

“Ne, what is this Tsubaki-chan?” The initial tiredness that had weighed down on his face had receded, being replaced with a burning curiosity and loving smile. 

“It’s to make our game of hide-and-seek more fun. You’ll play with us today, right Ojisan?” Tsubaki shyly smiled at her uncle, a plea subtly being communicated through her gaze. 

Of course he would play with his nieces and nephews. Even if he wanted to say no (which, obviously, he would never do), how could he ever reject those eyes? 

You and Suga had been married for quite a few years now, but you had been together for a long time before that. Soon after you two started dating, Suga had become best friends with your older brother. Moreover, you were very close with your brother’s girlfriend as well. So the four of you were inseparable. 

That continued into your married lives. You and Suga would invite over your brother and his wife once a week on Friday, spending the time to go out to restaurants, do game nights, or just watch movies. However, as time went on, the family dynamic shifted as your brother had his first child. And then the next one. They were now up to 4 kids, the oldest being 7 years old, the youngest at 2. Double dates became Ghibli Studio binges and babysitting time. 

Not that either of you minded, though. Your nieces and nephews were all angels, and you and Suga both loved caring for children. You and Suga had been trying for kids of your own for a while, but for the longest time, things didn’t seem to be in your favor. Suga knew that you felt responsible and that it weighed down on you, so he always kept his spirits high for you both. But you knew your beloved husband too well- he wanted a baby as badly as you, if not more. 

“Of course I’ll play with you guys,” Suga ruffled her hair, tightly holding the paper in his other hand. 

“I’m assuming Sumire-chan, Fumio-chan, and Mizu-chan are already hiding then?” He asked, glancing around the room to see if he could see any poorly hidden heads or tiny movements. 

“Y-yes...When you find them make sure you ask them for their papers, okay?” Before Suga could answer, she quickly turned around and scurried to the kitchen and grabbed her father’s leg, tugging on the fabric. “Did I do okay Otou-san?” She whispers quietly. 

Her father gives her a big smile and nods, patting her head. A hint of a smile pulls up at your lips as well. Tsubaki was the oldest of the group, and such a good older sister to her siblings, but she was yours and Suga’s lil princess. When you asked the kids to help you out when you arrived at the house that day, she was the most enthusiastic about making her Ojisan happy. 

Suga opened the folded piece of paper in his hands, very curious as to what this was all about. On the white piece of paper, in his niece’s bubbly and straight handwriting, was written:

 “for giving us another.”

His eyebrows scrunched up in confusion, and his head instinctively tilted. That told him absolutely nothing. But he could conclude that there was some bigger message. They were all too small to come up with something like a scavenger hunt/hide-and-seek game, so he knew it was the doing of the three suspicious-looking adults watching him intently. 

What are you all planning? Suga asked with his eyes, eye contact jumping between all three of you. Hide and seek was the kids’ tradition with Suga. Without fail, they would beg him to play EVERY Friday when you guys came over. And without fail, he would always agree. It was his game with the kids. But it seems like the adults had a hand in the game this time around. It was a competition with them, too. Alright then, game on.

Now, there are some things you have to know about this household’s version of hide and seek. The kids have numbered them as rules and made a nice little poster to go along with them, that way everyone would know them. 

Rule 1! Suga Oji-san will always be the first one to seek. 

Because, for some reason, Suga Oji-san was also a master hide-and-seeker, there was an extra rule when he was seeking. 

Rule 2! When Suga Oji-san is seeking, he has to do it in 15 minutes, or else we win!!

“Tsubaki-chan!~ when does my time start?” He calls out to the little girl, but his eyes are trained on you. 

Tsubaki looks up to her father because she forgot to keep track (oops). 

“You’re down a minute, Koushi,” your brother responds, leaning against the table in the kitchen. 

“You know, if you don’t find all the kids in that time, you may not get all the pieces of paper,” your sister-in-law chimed in, teasingly, at which you chuckled. 

Suga quirked an eyebrow, his competitive spirit really getting riled up now. “Tsubaki-chan, are you gonna come help me find the others?” He put his bag down by the door itself and started to quickly move towards the stairs. 

Rule 3! Once found, you have to help the seeker find the other hiders. 

Tsubaki scurried back to her Oji-san, happily (but quietly) saying, “Let’s go find Sumire-chan and Fumio-chan,” as she pulled his hand, leading him up the stairs. 

Suga knew that he genuinely couldn’t lose this time around. Sure, he could usually find the kids easily because they rotated through the same spots, but he always made a spectacle of trying to find them, loudly expressing how lost he was. Sometimes he would even lose on purpose. But not today, knowing that the adults would hold to their word of not letting him see the last piece of paper if he wasn’t in time. Sumire, first on the list of kids to find, had also gotten better at hiding now that she was older, and Suga wouldn’t be surprised if her father helped her find a new hiding space.

“Ne, Tsubaki-chan, do you know if Sumire-chan is hiding in the spare guest bedroom?” 

“Oh uh, I-I don’t know…” she pushed up her glasses and tugged on her sweater. 

He’s taking that as a yes. “Let’s go check.” 

Usually, she hid under the bed or burrowed beneath a pile of pillows that sat by the headboard, but she was in neither location. Suga pursed his lips, hands falling to his hips. “Sumire-chan is almost always in this room! But I can’t find her anywhere. She must be a master hider, I swear,” he proclaims, leaning against the wall. The closet door that was mostly closed didn’t mask the muffled giggle that carried in the air. 

“Tsubaki-chan, is that a… monster in the closet?” He gasps dramatically, as he pushes the door open slightly, just in case Sumire was behind the door. The giggling from the closet mixed with Tsubaki’s as they found Suga Oji-chan’s commentary hilarious. 

There, hiding in the corner of the closet with spare pillows and stuffed animals covering everything but her face, Sumire was now giggling uncontrollably. 

“I’m not a monster, Oji-san~~~!” 

“You’re right,” Suga responds as he pulls the pillows and stuffed toys off her body, pulling her arms lightly to help her stand up, “you’re Sumire-chan!” he cheers, pulling her into a hug, which she joyously returns. 

“Sumire!” Tsubaki whisper shouts. “The paper!” 

“Oh! Oji-san take this~!” she pulls the piece of paper out from her overall’s front pocket and holds it up to him. 

Suga takes the paper and opens it to read- 

“Thank you” 

-written in neat cursive, resembling his sister-in-law’s writing. 

“For giving us another” and “thank you.” Yeah, I still have no idea what this means. He just has to find the other two pieces, then. No point in overthinking. 

“Tsubaki-chan, did Otou-san give you the timer to carry?” 

Yes, there is an official stopwatch they carry for this game. That’s how seriously they take hide and seek. 

“Mmhm! You have 8 minutes left, Oji-san.” 

“No time to waste, huh? Ok, let’s go find Fumio-chan then.” He slides the pieces of paper into his pocket and offered his hands for the little girls to hold, although Sumire opted to just hold his two fingers instead- it was easier for her smol hands (I love when children do that 🥺💖). 

As you put your mug into the sink while carrying out conversations with your brother, you watch Suga and the two little girls descend from the stairs, their tiny hands gently clasped in Suga’s. As they reach the bottom they dash to your brother, leaning against his legs. Suga makes eye contact with you and smirks lightly, his competitive spirit shining through. 

“Found Sumire, hmm?” You taunt, knowing that he took a little longer than usual. This game that usually had no stakes had insanely high stakes, which Suga had no cognizance of, so you try to be as unassuming as possible. 

“I did!” He taunts back, but his eyes drop to her and his voice softens. “She did a good job hiding, though.” You turn just in time to see her whole face light up. Your heart bursts at the sight. You both would die for these kids. From when Tsubaki was born to Mizu’s first steps, you and Suga had been there to see a lot of it and raise them in part.

“The next target is Fumio. But I have no idea where he is!!” Raising his voice at the last part, he looks around dramatically, eliciting a giggle from the two little girls. 

Fumio is almost always in the kitchen- during hide and seek and even outside the bounds of the game (baby loves food). Suga monologues, opening the pantry and turning on the lights. 

Would he go somewhere entirely different to throw me off? 

Well, no. The point of the game IS for Suga to win (this time around). 

So where is he? 

The girls let out another round of giggles when Suga opens the fridge to look for Fumio, and you and your brother can’t help but chuckle as well. 

“Ne, Ni-san,” Suga calls to your brother. “Can you give me a hint to where Fumio-chan might be?” 

“I don’t know,” he pulls his mug away from his face. “Do you think I should help Oji-san?” He looks down at his girls.

Little Sumire nods her head aggressively and Tsubaki quietly responds, “Yes!” 

“Koushi-kun. You remember when Fumio was like, 2 and would crawl everywhere?” your brother starts.

How could any of you forget? The kid ended up hiding unintentionally in all the worst places. Underneath desks, behind the couch, inside the dishwasher- it was endless. But there was one place above all he loved to hide…

Suga’s eyes met your brother’s, lighting up with understanding. 

“Fumio loves helping put away the dishes, right Tsubaki-chan?” Suga walks around to the other side of the kitchen, where you were now standing next to all the cupboards filled with cooking pots. 

“But sometimes he puts himself away, with the pots, too.” He was right. Fumio would put a pot away and push it all the way to the back of the cabinet, only to crawl in after it. How he found the spot comfy, none of you understood. But it made for some very cute photos. 

“Fumio thinks he’s a pot!” Sumire chimes in. 

“So I should check where all the pots are, shouldn’t I?” With that, Suga opens the (already slightly open) cabinet, to reveal a little boy with his hands over his mouth (concealing giggles) and a pot on his head. Suga smiles and lifts the 3-year-old out of the cabinet, pot sliding down and covering the child’s eyes. 

“Look! Fumio-chan is a pothead!!” Sumire cries out. 

All three of you burst out laughing, your brother almost spitting out his hot chocolate. 

“Su-Sumire-chan don’t say that okay? It means something different,” you try and talk without dissolving into giggles again.

“Hmm? But he has a pot on his head. What else could it mean?” She looked extremely confused and you couldn’t even fault her for it. 

“You’ll find out when you’re older,” your brother’s classic way of shutting down unwanted topics (for now). 

Fumio, on the other hand, was just glad to be in his uncle’s arms, surrounded by his favorite pots. 

“Oji-san, here!” Fumio giggled as he held the piece of paper up above his head with both hands. Suga pulled the boy against his body, opting to hold him with his left arm, while receiving and reading the piece of paper with his right. 

“To play with”

-was all that was written on the small piece, this time clearly in your brother’s handwriting. 

“Thank you for giving us another… to play with.” Suga’s hand goes slack as his eyebrows furrow in thought. What did I give them to play with? Did I buy them a toy recently? Was I supposed to buy them something!? 

The little boy in Suga’s hand notes the pensive look his Oji-san had-- leading to the boy’s decision to poke his Oji-san’s face, right on his beauty mark. “You have to find Mizu-chan!!” He cries, his smol finger gently pressing into Suga’s cheek. 

Your brother gently tilts the watch in Tsubaki’s hands. “2 minutes, Koushi.” 

“2 minutes!” A lot more time actually elapsed than he expected. “Let’s go find Mizu-chan then! Come on, Tsubaki-chan, Sumire-chan!” 

Suga hands Fumio over to you, taking the pot off his head and placing it on the table. He reaches his hands out to the girls again, both of whom accept gladly. And with that, he bounds back into the living room where your sister-in-law still waits. 

“One minute, Oji-san!” Sumire calls out this time, genuinely concerned her uncle won’t make it in time. 

But there’s another unspoken rule that’s been accepted by all the participants that ensures Suga’s success. 

Rule 4! The baby gets to be found last. 

Mizu was just 2 years old. He didn’t understand the concept of winning or losing. He just liked it when other people played with him. But the older kids did understand winning. And just like Suga, they were quite competitive. This rule was made to teach them that being nice to those who can’t play as much (like a baby) is more important than winning. 

With this stipulation, Mizu consistently hid in the same spot for every single game. Without fail, in the small woven basket used to house all the family blankets, the baby boy would sit in silence, his mom right next to him on the couch it lays adjacent to. 

Suga was gonna draw it out, though. If it's not a show for the kids, then was there really a point? 

You and your brother (who now had his turn at holding Fumio) watched as Suga ran behind the TV, searched beneath the table, and moved pillows on the couch searching for the baby of the family. 

“30 seconds!” 

“I have no idea where Mizu is! What should I do?” 

Sumire’s face is flushed with worry and excitement as she runs up to him and grabs his hand with both of her own, pulling him towards the blankie basket. “Oji-san! He hides here usually! Hurry before time runs out!” 

You sit down onto the arm of the couch as Suga stares at the woven basket. 

“10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2…” 

“Found you!!!” Suga pulls the cover of the basket away, triggering an endless stream of baby giggles from little 2-year-old Mizu. Suga picks up Mizu and his stuffed bear that he had been clinging onto. 

“Oji-san wins!!” Sumire jumps up and down, hopping onto her mother’s lap. Tsubaki opts to sit on the floor, ready to watch what was to come. At this point, you and your brother are also sitting on the couch, your anxiousness raising in your belly. 

“So where’s that last piece of paper….” Suga scans the baby for any pockets when he realizes it's tucked into the ribbon around the neck of the bear in his hands. 

“I’ll take him,” your sister in law says as she gently puts Sumire on the side, grabbing Mizu from Suga before sitting down again. 

Suga slides the slip of paper out from the bear’s ribbon and sits onto his knees, retrieving the other pieces of paper from his pockets. 

“Ready for the big reveal?” He asked the kids in tone of voice, but the adults through eye contact. Although he had no doubts all the adults already knew the message. 

Tsubaki nodded in agreement while Fumio’s eyes were trained on his Oji-san. Sumire was fidgety. 

“Alright! So it says, ‘Thank you...’ ‘for giving us…’” he places the little slips onto the floor, leaving a gap for the 3rd piece. “...Something ‘to play with.’ Let’s see what I gave you guys to play with.” The final piece was now being flipped over in his fingers. He was killing himself with the suspense. “Thank you for giving us another-” he drops the last piece into line with the others, “-FRIEND… to play with…”  

Though the words came out of Suga’s mouth, he didn’t process what they had meant right away. For once, the fun and playful Koushi oji-san had dropped his usual playful demeanor for one of complete shock. 

A...a friend? 

Your nerves were now skyrocketing as you felt your brother squeeze your arm in a calm and reassuring manner. You get up, arms hugging yourself as you slowly approach Suga, who was dumb struck on the floor. 

But before you could speak, Tsubaki spoke up, scooching towards Suga, tugging on his arm sleeve.

“Oji-san, remember when I asked you if you and Y/N Oba-san had any babies I could be friends with, and you told me we would have to wait a while?” Suga’s eyes moved to the little girl, wide in surprise. In honesty, her words caught you and your brother off guard as well. 

She remembered that? It was a conversation from around when Fumio was a few months old, and you and Suga had been trying so hard for a child then. She asked Suga if she could play with your kids, somehow convinced that you guys were hiding your own children from meeting her. It crushed you both internally, but you had smiled as Suga told her “Oba-san and I don’t have any friends for you now. But I promise we will give you another friend to play with as soon as we can! You might have to wait for a while though.” He had ruffled her hair and smiled, but it was pained. Though she was young and didn’t understand why, she knew that what she had said had hurt Koushi oji-san, one of her favorite people. You assumed your sister-in-law had told her to just not ask you or Suga about it again, but you never assumed she actually held onto the memory. 

Suga just looked at Tsubaki, waiting for her to continue. 

“... well… Oba-san said that she has a baby in her tummy… and that when it comes out we can be friends… so we wanted to say thank you for keeping your promise, Oji-san.” 

Everything goes still. Even the small children sitting in the room, Mizu now sleeping on his mother’s shoulder while Fumio and Sumire hugged each other, aware of the frozen air... 

...until Suga lets out a shuttered breath. You look at him, watching tears stream down his eyes, and you exhale a breath you didn’t know you had been holding. 

“Yes, Tsubaki-chan, I told you we would keep our promise,” he jumps up, pulling her into a hug and spinning her around. She starts laughing and he laughs too. Before you know it your body starts shaking from giggles and tears that can’t help but escape you. You can hear your sister-in-law crying as well, and feel your brother’s arm pull you into a hug, a bright smile plastered across his face. 

Your sister-in-law had come with you to your doctor’s appointment 3 weeks prior to confirm the pregnancy. However, you wanted to hold off on telling Suga just to increase the chances of the pregnancy carrying through. You couldn’t bear the thought of telling him only to lose the baby mid pregnancy- that would absolutely crush him. So while waiting, you decided to come up with a fun way to tell him, getting your nieces and nephews in on the plan in the process. Although your brother and sister had known, neither had really processed the information. And neither had you. Not until this moment. 

Suga put Tsubaki down and approached you, face completely tear-stained and smile bright as the sun. You always somehow got lost in his beautiful features, and now you felt lost in the happiness radiating off of him. You let him engulf you in his arms, kissing your forehead while his tears rolled onto your face. 

“We finally did it, love.” He whispers. 

You push your face into his button-up shirt, inhaling his cologne and the reminiscent smell of detergent.

“We did,” you murmur against him. 

“Wait, Oji-san and Oba-san are gonna have a baby?!” You hear a surprised Sumire ask loudly. Evidently, she had been a bit out of the loop and Tsubaki one-san had to fill her in a bit. 

“Yes, Sumi, we are having a baby,” you respond, turning your head to look at her but not letting go of Suga. 

You watch the realization dawn on her, turning to Fumio. “Fumio there’s another baby coming!” She jumps up and down once more, spreading her excitement to the little boy who starts clapping and jumping with her. 

“Ba-by! Ba-by! Ba-by!” the two cheer while Tsubaki tries to shush them, Mizu still fast asleep. 

“Alright you two, shhh! Time for dinner. You can cheer more after dinner,” your sister-in-law chides as she heads to the kitchen. 

“Who’s ready for some ramen?” 

“Ra-men! Ra-men!”

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Once dinner was over, a movie was watched, the children were put to bed, and dishes put away, you and Suga say bye to your brother and sister-in-law. 

“Goodnight Ni-chan!” you say as you watch him close the door. 

“Night Y/N-chan, Koushi-kun.” He waves a final goodbye. 

As you approach the passenger side of the car, you feel a hand lightly tug your wrist. You turn around to have Suga wrap his one arm around you while guiding your face to his as he gives you a slow and loving kiss. As you pull away, Suga buries his face into the crook of your neck, his smile pressed against your skin. 

“We’ve waited for so long, Y/N… and now it’s finally happened.” 

You pet his hair and snuggle against his head. “I know, Koushi. And it will be wonderful. You’re going to be the best dad out there.” 

“And you’re gonna be a wonderful mom.”

You both stand there for a minute, bodies warm in each other’s embrace and hearts warm in the realization of your shared dream. 

“But you know, our baby’s gonna be really lucky,” you giggle. 

Suga pulls away to look at your face. “Why is that?” 

You put a hand on your stomach.

 “Baby is going to have a lot of wonderful friends to play with, always.”

[queen-of-my-goofball-army]

An Ode To Miyazaki:

Hi everyone! So for my final paper for film, we had to pick our own director of our choosing and talk about them extensively between the attributes that make them special. Our course focused on the narrative and technical styles of directors. For my final project, I have chosen my biggest hero in the world of animation and somebody that drastically changed my life as a young child, Hayao Miyazaki. Learning about him for this project gave me so much insight into not just his films but who he is as a person. I hope that my paper is as interesting for you to read as it was for me to do research for!

1. Hayao Miyazaki, often referred to as the Japanese Walt Disney is the front runner of his animation studio Studio Ghibli. I picked him because I already have sufficient knowledge and love of his films. One of the first memories that my parents love to remind me of is my first time watching Totoro and laughing at the introduction characters. Miyazaki himself stands out for a number of reasons. Over the years, Miyazaki has made a humongous name out of himself, one of his most famous movies Spirited Away became the most popular film to ever be released in Japan and also won the academy award for the best-animated film that year. His most “popular” films (I say popular in air quotes because it is nearly impossible for people to agree on a favorite) remain the aforementioned Spirited Away, My Neighbor Totoro, Howl’s Moving Castle, and Princess Mononoke. Beginning his career as a simple animator for Toei animation, he worked as an in-between artist. It was here that he met his future collaborator at Ghibli, Isao Takahata. His first big directorial debut in film before founding Ghibli was a team effort without Takahata was Lupin The Third, The Castle Of Cagliostro. His first successful movie was one that was based upon his own manga Nausicaa of the Valley Of The Wind. The first official Miyazaki movie that was made with Ghibli was one of my personal all-time favorites that had ever been created, Castle In The Sky. For many children, especially ones with parents who are lovers of a film like mine, Miyazaki was one of the first animators that I was introduced to. His films have become classics for every fan of animation, being referenced in culture, specifically back when Disney owned Studio in Toy Story 3, Bonnie has a Totoro.

2. So, this brings up the question, how does one recognize a film by Miyazaki? You can always expect for him to be critically acclaimed, for there to be some element of magic and whimsy in the way that he animates, for there to be something to do with flight (whether it be dealing with airplanes like in Porco Rosso, the idea of flight in Howl’s Moving Castle, or a floating castle up in the sky in Castle In The Sky.), his heroines are always strong-minded and live by their own rules never bowing down to anybody, his love stories are dynamic and fulfilled, a sweeping score by Joe Hizashi, and they have a meaning about nature somewhere, mostly about why it needs to be protected.

Let’s start by breaking him down narratively. The thing that is always in every Miyazaki film no matter which one you decide upon watching, is that his female characters are always strong-willed no matter what. In many ways, I think that he writes women better than Disney does. He has gone on record saying “Many of my movies have strong female leads—brave, self-sufficient girls that don't think twice about fighting for what they believe with all their heart. They'll need a friend, or a supporter, but never a savior. Any woman is just as capable of being a hero as any man.” Sometimes, this will cause them to come across as reckless, or stupid, but in my opinion, I have always looked up to his female characters and the way that they are portrayed. My personal favorite female character that he has ever brought to life through the screen is Sophie from Howl’s Moving Castle. She is strong-minded, not willing to put up with any of Howl’s dramatics, kind, an incredible adult figure for Markal, endlessly sympathetic to her friend’s plights (namely Howl and Calcifer), and somebody that I can always look up to. I spent most of my childhood looking up to characters like Kiki in Kiki’s Delivery Service, Chihiro in Spirited Away, or one of my personal favorite underrated girls, Fio in Porco Rosso. All of these female characters are independent and never let themselves be taken advantage of by anybody.

Another trait that can always be found narratively in his films is that Miyazaki is an airplane/ air travel fanatic. He absolutely loves airplanes, even to the point where his latest film, The Wind Rises was based upon the life of one of the first airplane manufacturers in WWII. Almost all of his films will involve something about flying in the air. Even with the ones that he didn’t direct and he just simply wrote. His obsession with flight is something that stemmed from his childhood and he never saw them as a thing to be used for war “airplanes are not tools for war. They are not for making money. Airplanes are beautiful dreams. Engineers turn dreams into reality.” My personal favorite of all of his flight animation is used in Howl’s Moving Castle when Howl and Sophie “fly” over the heads of all the people below them.

Narratively also one of the biggest things that set apart his films from any others is his focus on nature. The idea of protecting the beauty of nature is something that he has always stood by. A lot of the time, America tries to prove that it can make films about nature as well to usually varying results. I think that nobody can sell an environmental message quite like my biggest hero for Japanese animation. One of the main movies that focus on his will to protect nature above all else is Princess Mononoke. He always manages to animate nature in such a beautiful and majestic way no matter where the film is set.

I also think that a narrative trait of his that often gets overlooked is how beautiful the romance in his films can be. He never has a romance between two characters that feels stale or boring. I love the fact that you can pick any number of his films and the chance of there being a romance that you’ll get sucked into is a very large one. Everybody has their personal favorites, I love Howl and Sophie from Howl’s Moving Castle but my best friend loves Sousuke and Ponyo from Ponyo. He has on record saying that “I’ve become skeptical of the unwritten rule that just because a boy and girl appear in the same feature, a romance must ensue. Rather, I want to portray a slightly different relationship, one where the two mutually inspire each other to live - if I’m able to, then perhaps I’ll be closer to portraying a true expression of love.” Writing romance between two characters can be a very tricky thing which is why it’s always amazing when he can continually pull it off despite everything and how many films that he has made over the years. The beauty of having both a strong and independent male and the female character is that they can both lean on one another for love and support. Probably the biggest supporter of this is Whisper Of The Heart, a film that he wrote instead of directing. The romance is what makes up the entire film. It’s a beautiful love story about how two young teenagers fall in love with each other. The romance is something that continually keeps me coming back for more every time.

Technical style Miyazaki can always be assured to deliver breathtakingly stunning animation. There is a reason why so many people leave his films starving because the food that he draws always looks so good. For me though, it’s the backgrounds that stand out above all else. It’s nearly impossible to have one favorite shot in one of his films but I as a matter of fact do have one. The most breathtaking animation in any Miyazaki film is the scene where Howl takes Sophie to see his secret garden. Everything about this scene never fails to make my breath catch. It’s such a profoundly beautiful moment and how it is animated is something that I haven’t forgotten since my first initial viewing of the film when I was seven.

Another iconic technical trait is that Disney did a fantastic job dubbing the films from their original Japanese language into English. Back when Ghibli films first started to become popular, they needed a way for an American audience to see them. So Pixar’s CFO at the time, John Lassater made a deal with Ghibli that they would dub all the films from their original language for a brand new audience. Growing up, this was how I watched all of Miyazaki’s films. I fell in love with the way that they sounded in English. To this very day, I have yet to see one of his films in any other language. I don’t think that anybody could have dubbed them better. Ever since Ghibli and Disney went their separate ways and they went to GKids the dubs haven’t been the same.

Finally, the last technical trait is that a Miyazaki film will always have a score done by his longtime collaborator Joe Hizashi. The score is such a big part of what makes Miyazaki’s films his own. They are what get you sucked in through their whimsical and magical tones; they always fit the vibes that he’s going through at that moment. There is also the element of sound. Every Miyazaki film has a distinct sound effect that will set it apart from the one before it.

3. The first film that I want to look at is my personal favorite of all his films that he has made so far if you were to force me to pick just one Howl’s Moving Castle. Released in 2004, it was the 9th film that the director came out with. It has an 8.2 out of 10 on IMDB and an 87% on Rotten Tomatoes. The storyline for the movie follows a young woman named Sophie. She gets a curse set upon her by the Witch of the Waste and when she leaves home she finds the infamous Howl’s Moving Castle. This is the second Ghibli movie voiced by a Batman live action actor. Christian Bale voiced Howl Pendragon after Michael Keaton played the titular Porco Rosso.

Narratively this is definitely a Miyazaki film. From how strong of a female character Sophie is I spent most of my childhood looking up to her as a character. Strong female characters are everywhere in his films and in my opinion, Sophie is one of the strongest. Another strong factor is that flight plays a major part in this film. One of Howl’s main powers is that he has the ability to fly around. This leads to my favorite scene of flight in any Miyazaki film when Howl takes Sophie’s hand and they “fly” over the tops of the city down below them. All of his early films up until the last few were set in someplace other than Japan. This one is set in Europe, and he takes a lot of time while in the cities to show off all the different types of buildings while Sophie tours around the city.

Technically speaking this is also a Miyazaki film and holds all the titular traits of being so. The animation is utterly for lack of a better word, magical and spellbinding. It takes my breath away every time that I rewatch it. The food looks incredible, one scene that most of Miyazaki’s fans always think of when this movie is brought up is Calcifer making the food for Howl, Sophie, and Markal to eat. The dub for this film is also one of Disney’s best dubs for Miyazaki films. It even brings actors to the table that I usually would not like to see in other films like Christian Bale. I haven’t loved him in any other films than this one. Billy Crystal is a stand-out as well as my favorite fire demon Calcifer. The score is done by Joe Hizashi as well. My favorite part of the score is the main theme which has Howl and Sophie floating above the people below. The sound effect that follows throughout this film is the steady creaking of the castle itself.

Princess Mononoke was the first time that Miyazaki ever “retired”. Most of the time, whenever he tries to retire, he always comes back. A lot of his colleague's joke that it’s because he physically can’t stop working. He animated most of this movie by himself. Before Spirited Away it was Japan’s most famous film to date. The story about a young man who is just trying to erase the curse that was set upon him by an angry boar and it leads him to a place called Iron Town is something that never fails to amaze me. While in Iron Town, Ashitaka meets a young woman named San who was taken in by wolves and he finds himself caught between a war involving humans and the gods of the forest.

Narratively this is definitely a Miyazaki film. It has a strong female lead, focusing most of its screen time on how important it is to protect and preserve nature as a whole. The idea of protecting nature is such a moving part of the film, as we see what it does when man takes over the forest. We see how distraught it makes the Gods of this world and how they wish that the humans would just go away. However, you also see it from the point of view of the villain of the film Lady Eboshi, who also regularly helps lepers and people who would often never get work outside of her offering them a home and a family. I have regularly gotten into a debate with my mom over which side is “right” and which side “wrong” over the course of the last few years of me being a massive fan of this movie. She takes the side of the forest while I see Ashitaka’s side that everybody should just get along and interact in peace and harmony. Miyazaki never shoves the idea of nature down your throat. That is not what this film is. It’s instead about the beauty of what we have and learning to appreciate it.

On a technical level, this film is fantastic as well. It blows my mind that Miyazaki-san animated most of it all by himself. The backgrounds are sweeping and utterly gorgeous showing off the time period of the film. The fight sequences which make up the bulk of the film’s running time are engaging, thrilling, and fabulously animated. Mononoke’s score was done by Joe Hizashi as well. Its score is beautiful and I always find myself getting sucked into it, especially for the more dynamic scenes with Ashitaka and San. The sound effect for this film uses nature as a backdrop for brutality. Ashitaka’s arrows don’t just come out of his bow, they screech through the air.

Finally, my last film that we will be focusing on, Kiki’s Delivery Service was made in 1989 a year after his cult phenomena My Neighbor Totoro and was his fifth animated feature. Kiki is a young girl that is hoping to become a young witch in training. However, to do so she has to train a year away from home. She and her cat Jiji find a town by the sea where she learns her true strength and what she can really do to help others. Hayao Miyazaki didn't want to bore the audience during the film's end credits by using just the names. He set it up to be like a mini-sequel so that the audience would leave the theatre feeling happy.

Narratively this has all the traits that one should be familiar with and associate with a Miyazaki film. It has a strong-minded female character at the source of it that young girls can look up to and admire. As a kid, Kiki was my favorite female character of his because I loved her strength and her dedication to what she was good at. She knew that she was still young and had a lot to learn but even though she gets depressed she doesn’t let that stop her in the long run and will still save her love interest Tombo. The romance in this film is by far one of the sweetest. I love the interactions between the characters and the way that they both inspire one another to be better than they are. The idea of flight is basically the focal point of everything. Kiki finds that her best trait is that she flies incredibly well and decides to create her own flying delivery service.

Technically this also has a lot of traits that Miyazaki made a name for himself in doing. The animation is spectacular, especially for Kiki’s flying. I could watch her fly around all day and that was the idea that he was going for while making the film. The sweeping score by Joe Hizashi, especially in my favorite song A Town With An Ocean View, is something that I’ll often listen to outside of the film itself. The sound effects for the film are meant to be calming. From the first sound that you hear of the wind rolling through the reeds while Kiki lies against the grass to the waves when she finally finds a home.

4. Miyazaki as a director has inspired me since I was way too young to even remember. When I was a kid I would pretend to run around my apartment building's front yard imagining that I lived in a big house in front of a camper tree like the one in Totoro. His movies are perfect for children that “suffer” from having an overactive imagination. His movies are everything that is bright and beautiful in the world. The animation never fails to take my breath away, the characters and stories are unforgettable, the soundtracks sweep me away and tell stories themselves. His movies are something that even my parents, who are not anime fans, can watch over and over again. I think that speaks for itself. Miyazaki makes films that are art, not just animated films.

[catcze]

Oh, Catte, my beloved... The bracelet is so beautiful. Goodness, did I cry when I took it out of the envelope. It's almost as beautiful as you are, I love it so much! I'm never ever taking this off. Oh starlight I'm so happy, you may as well have just proposed! I love you so so much, thank you💜💜💜

I'm glad Cyno is doing well for himself these days! It's not really that complex of a spell, simple transmutation really, but I'm sure he didn't want to overwhelm you. He may not talk a lot but trust me; he cares. I should write him sometime, if only so the next time an emergency arises he won't think I only remember he exists when I need his help, hehe... I'm joking of course, he's not the kind of person to care. I do still owe him a favor though. Two, now that he's gone out of his way to teach my girlfriend magic, and specifically for helping you make me this wonderful present. Send along my thanks please, but please don't mention that I said I'd write him, just in case I somehow forget to. You know me, heh..

Also I'm a little surprised to hear that name again! Collei was quite the visitor when she was here a few years ago, it's a long story, and one I doubt very much she'd want me to tell. Suffice to say she and Amber are good friends, but I'm sure she already asked you about her as soon as you mentioned Mondstadt. I'm so relieved to hear she's safe, and studying medicine no less! Tell her I'm proud of her. She'll do great things in her life.

I must admit I'm slightly bothered to hear that so many scholars accosted my poor babygirl to ask if I'd return, I'm so sorry darling. If they give you any more trouble, oh I'll come visit alright. To dispense punishment(although I'd definitely grab some food on the way as we left). Speaking of food, that's so sweet of you to offer to learn the local cuisine just for me~ you're so thoughtful, it's one of the many many things I love about you. My reputation around the school is honestly the only accomplishment you'll find though sweetheart. I wasn't really all that social there, aside from talking to the professors and scholars. I couldn't afford to procrastinate if I wanted to learn everything I could. Funny, that sounds completely unlike me, now doesn't it~ Those lectures can be tiresome at first, did they provide you with the appropriate reading materials, or are you only listening? I still have my copy of the first semester alchemy textbook--it's only about 800 pages, but they're packed to the brim with knowledge. I still reference it sometimes.

Like I mentioned though, most of my time in Sumeru was spent at the Academy or at the local restaurants. If you wanted food recommendations, those I can provide, but unfortunately I won't be of much use otherwise. Sorry cutie~

[the next page of the letter is a list of local restaurants, many with recommended dishes written next to them. There's also a fair number of heart shapes and "I love you"s doodled around the edges of the paper]

I hope you'll try at least some of those and tell me what you think. The more you talk about it honestly, the more it's beginning to grow on me. I do want to go back and visit with you, my love. I miss it, even if I don't want to admit that. It would be so much fun to sight see with you, being able to just meander aimlessly through the city, not a care in the world, and with you by my side... That sounds amazing. I'd want nothing more. Perhaps for our honeymoon~? [the last sentence of the paragraph is crossed out with a single streak of ink cutting through it]

Your photos are all amazing, darling. I just wish I had as many to send you in return, but unfortunately I don't own a camera, nor can I afford to leave the library long enough to travel to Liyue and buy one. That being said, Albedo does have one, and he already took that first photo. Darling, I'm curious, and please, *please* say no if it would bother you even slightly. If I... Perhaps wanted to take some... Pictures, just for your enjoyment~ ...would you mind if I had Albedo continue to serve as the photographer? I want my baby to be thinking of me, especially since I'm not there to pleasure you myself~💜 again, PLEASE say no if you'd have any problem with that. Or I could ask Jean if that would be better. I just want to treat my princess to some candy~

That line is going to have me up all night, I swear. I do wish I was there for you in every sense, but goodness does my heart ache for you. I miss the way you taste so much, my precious little munchkin~ you're not going to sleep at all the first night you're back in my arms, I hope you know that. I'm going to edge you so hard you'll cry for me, hehe~ I'm a little peeved you didn't take notice of my comment about punishing you! There will be ropes involved when you return to me. Just the way you always like it, cutie~ tell me, how bad do you miss me? Miss my tongue you love so much~? Don't worry baby--you'll get everything you could ever want for when you come home. I can't wait to taste you~ goodness, excuse me a moment baby... I need to scratch an itch before I finish writing this letter, hehe...~

Okay, I'm back. That was quite the itch, it just kept coming back~ that picture you sent with this letter may have helped with that... Celestia, you're so so beautiful, my rose..~ I love you so much.

Where was I... Ah yes. I'm very glad you've been eating and sleeping properly. Such a good girl you always are~💜 and don't worry; I'm taking care of myself as well. I've been becoming more adjusted to the late nights lately, since your letters often arrive around this hour(it's 11:30 right now, although up until a page ago it had been 10:15, hehe...). I don't mind it at all, since you know I love to sleep in anyway. I love reading your letters sweetheart. They truly do carry your love across the distance. I'm so happy that you're my partner. I love you so so much. I reread your letters every day, they put such a smile on my face.

Also, what's this about ideas you're having ever since I mentioned the uniform? Tell me!! Pretty please~? 💜

I'm going to call my letter to a close here, before I end up needing a bigger envelope, hehe~ I love you so much, starlight. Please take care, and I hope you're well rested when you read this. Hopefully I can put a smile on your beautiful face. I just wish I was there to see it. I love you so much, take care and write me back when you can, promise~?

Yours Always,

- Lisa 🌺💜

Milddd nsfw here muaH <33

Hi, love, I’m so happy that you like your gift! I love you very much as well— hopefully it can give you comfort on some particularly hard nights where I cannot be with you, dearest. Sort of like a reminder that although I cannot be there with you in person, you always carry a piece of my heart with you, you know?

I’ll be sure to relay your message to Cyno and Collei! They were rather surprised when they found out I was your girlfriend, haha! In a good way, of course— they’ve been great company so far.

And don’t worry about the other scholars, Lisa dear. I can handle them plenty fine. I’m sure they’ll go running if I even so much as imply that you wouldn’t be pleased with them for their behavior, my love. They wouldn’t want to mess with one of the best sorcerers to ever roam those halls, you know?

Regarding the lectures, they offered to loan me some textbooks actually, but I had to turn them down since, well, I am just an observer, and carrying so many books with me to and fro would weigh me down. Still, although I sometimes get confused while I observe, It’s such a fun and interesting experience! I can’t say I’m remembering every bit of knowledge I hear, but I’ve definitely learned at least a thing or two.

Just yesterday, there was a bit of a lull in lectures that I was attending— something about one of the scholars who had agreed to host me taking their class out to fieldwork, and I was unable to accompany them. So I took the time to check out some of the restaurants you listed for me! I went to just one of them for lunch, since I didn’t want to get too full throughout the day, and I enjoyed it very much!! I included a picture of one of the dishes you noted for me (a best seller of theirs, apparently) and I didn’t regret purchasing it at all. It was so good! In my free time, it’s one of the recipes that I hope to familiarize and bring back home to you— I think you’ll rather like it, especially since there’s no meat. Hopefully I’ll get good enough at making it that you’ll be able to savor the flavor too!

Though, I don’t mind either if you’d rather return with me next time, and we can have a dinner date here? I really like the ambiance of the place— its both romantic and private. And the view from the balcony here is absolutely magical. Or we can maybe visit a couple of the other restaurants you’ve recommended to me? I doubt that I’ll be able to try all of them this time, and being able to experience it with you would make the experience a million times better.

Also, regarding the photos you mentioned— well, I’m fine with it if you are. As long as you’re comfortable with whoever is photographing you love, then it’s perfectly alright with me. Besides, I know that we’re devoted to each other, so there’s no cause for me to be uncomfortable 💞 If you so wish to grant me such photos, I eagerly await them, love! They’re not the same as you being here, of course, but I’m sure they could help me with how much I miss you.

And ah, sending such things only makes me miss you more! Perhaps I should take a good, long rest before I come back to Mondstadt, if you plan to keep me up all night. And who says I didn’t notice your comment? Perhaps I was just teasing you by keeping quiet about it, especially if I know what’s awaiting me back home. And yes, I miss you so so much, I miss your tongue and you lips, your touch on my skin, the way you hold me and make me feel so good each and every time— Love, really, if your intention with that letter was to get me all worked up, then safe to say you’ve succeeded. My, I doubt I’m going to be getting any sleep tonight, thinking of you.

And regarding that bit about the Academy uniform… well, I might have found a local seamstress who was willing to make me a version of it, tailored to my measurements. It’s not ready quite yet, but hopefully I can send you some photographs soon 💞

By the way, love, there’s no need to have to wait up for my letters, not if you’re not getting enough sleep! I don’t mind waiting a bit for your reply as long as I know you’re sleeping on time. I worry about you as much as you worry about me, so for both your sake and mine, promise me you’ll get enough sleep? Either way, though, I’m glad you’re taking care of yourself, dearest. It makes me happy, knowing that you and the others are doing well. I love you very, very much you know? Please continue to stay safe, dearest, and know that I’m always missing you.

And, well, regarding a proper proposal, though I can’t say I haven’t thought of it before (how could I not? I can fully envision spending the rest of my life with you) I would much prefer if I were able to give you the ring and ask you in person, love. That being said, take the bracelet as a promise that I’ll return to you soon— and hopefully with a ring that I think you’ll like and a question that I plan to ask you.

All the best wishes, dearest. I love you very much 💞

—Catte 💞

[rufousnmacska]

Secrets and Confessions Part 5

A Crescent City Ruhn-Hypaxia fic

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

*****

Part 5

*****

Ruhn was in the process of sorting through a pile of probably useless tech when the knock came at his door. Expecting Bryce, he yelled, “No one’s here.”

The door opened to reveal Tharion Ketos, wearing a tailored suit and a smug grin.

“Fuck,” Ruhn grumbled. “What the fuck do you want?”

Ketos walked in as if he owned the place, pulling out a chair and taking in the room with curious eyes. The books on the seat were moved to the desk, atop a precarious stack of papers. “Hello to you too. Do you always swear so much?”

“All the fucking time,” Ruhn said, not bothering to return the greeting. He left the junk and turned to face Ketos. “Who let you in?”

“Your band mates.”

“What?”

Ketos wrinkled his brow. “Aren’t you three in a band or something? The way you all dress made me think-“

Ruhn growled. “What. Do. You. Want.”

The mer held up his hands in a peace offering and leaned back in the chair. “I’m here to discuss some things.”

“This better be Aux related because if it isn’t, I’m throwing your ass out.”

“Well I’m in luck because it is about your Aux unit.”

He hoped Tharion couldn’t see the disappointment on his face. He’d heard nothing from Hypaxia in the last few days. And he was too much of a coward to contact her, even though his control was eroding. He was embarrassingly close to calling her. Signaling for Tharion to go on, he sat on his bed, willing himself to concentrate.

“How many of your Aux unit would follow you?” the mer asked. “Hypothetically. Rough numbers.”

“To overthrow the asteri? Or to overthrow my father?”

“Both.”

Ruhn barked a laugh as Ketos was apparently done with the bullshit. He held the male’s sharp gaze as he thought about it. Just a few weeks ago he’d wanted to be involved with the rebels. Had even considered this very question, on many occasions. His Aux unit was comprised of the best of the Valbaran Fae. The strongest and smartest. All of them would follow him against the asteri.

Against his father though …

“Are they mutually exclusive?” He didn’t give a shit about his father. But he wasn’t sure if he was ready to lead a coup either.

“Not necessarily. If you can suggest a way to do one without your father becoming an equally bad replacement, I’m all ears.”

“Shit.” He really didn’t need to say anything else. The rebels might not know the extent of his father’s plans, but they had to have a good idea. They’d be idiots to not have a plan for the power vacuum if they were successful against the asteri.

Tharion stood and straightened out his suit jacket. “You can think about it. Let me know.” He headed for the door, and just as Ruhn was about to break and ask about her, Tharion said, “She wanted to tell you. Since the Summit. I know you understand why she couldn’t.” He made a vague gesture in reference to the ever-present cameras and recordings throughout the city. “And I know you understand that it was for your safety as well as for ours. Now, I can’t speak to anything personal between you two. But Hypaxia is the last person in the world to manipulate someone. Even for this cause. She’s the moral compass of the operation. And if you can’t get over whatever bullshit betrayal you’ve concocted in that pierced head of yours … Well, I guess it’ll be your loss.”

Ruhn said nothing as Tharion opened the door and started out. But the mer wasn’t done. With a wink, he said, “Your loss might be my gain.” And before Ruhn could throw something at him, he shut the door, yelling back, “Call her you fucking idiot!”

He laughed. He couldn’t help it. “What the fuck just happened?”

A buzz came from his phone and he rolled his eyes. The evening check in.

Did you clean your room yet?

For fuck’s sake Bryce. What’s with this obsession about cleaning?

It’s a good distraction when you feel like shit. Believe me. I know.

The truth in that made his annoyance fade. And made him feel bad for wallowing in self pity for so long. She’d survived much worse than a break-up. Considering where they’d been less than a year ago, barely speaking, fighting when they did … He smiled, glad that she was hounding him.

He sent her a photo of the progress he’d made, which he thought was pretty good. She disagreed and told him to get back to work.

As you wish your highness.

Don’t fucking call me that.

Ok your highness.

If you keep it up I’m coming over to supervise.

He sent a princess symbol with a heart. The heart always worked to end her tirades.

Laying back on his bed, he stared at his phone, wondering if he should take Tharion’s advice.

Tomorrow, he thought. After I straighten some shit out.

In the meantime, he went out into the hallway and shouted for Flynn and Dec. They came up after getting rid of the drunk fae and shifters they’d had over. Luckily, Dec was stone cold sober, and Flynn was close enough.

“How many from the unit can we trust?” He didn’t need to go into more detail. They knew everything he did about his father. Hel, they knew everything about him.

Everything except the truth about the Oracle’s prophecy. Which now seemed like it might be a good thing. If ending the bloodline meant ending the threat posed by his father, then Ruhn had no problem with his destiny. He’d proudly sacrifice his title if it led to a meaningful peace for Midgard.

His fingers itched to call Hypaxia and tell her exactly that.

But just then, Dec began rattling off names. Tristan nodded along, a far off look in his eyes that meant he was planning. And so Ruhn began planning too.

*****

The room was much emptier than Hypaxia had been expecting. Instead of a table surrounded by all the upper echelon rebels and their seconds, a lone figure sat at the far end. There wasn’t a single ashy blonde hair out of place on Jesiba Roga’s head, and her eyes were as unforgiving as the sharp edged nails she tapped on the table.

“You’re early,” she said by way of greeting. Hypaxia almost let out a breath of relief, thinking that meant there would be more coming. But the witch had seen, or sensed, her reaction and said, “It’s just us today.”

Sitting a fair distance away, she said, “I was told the full group would be meeting. Did I receive incorrect information?”

Jesiba didn’t answer, just took a drink from a glass that held a golden brown liquid. It looked like scotch, but Hypaxia didn’t know for sure. And she wouldn’t, as the witch didn’t offer her anything, alcohol or otherwise.

Hypaxia was tired. Already tired of the political bullshit required not just in her role with the rebellion, but as queen. Technically, regardless of what she’d renounced and who she now claimed to serve, Jesiba was one of her subjects. Hypaxia wasn’t stupid enough to order her to do anything. But for Cthona’s sake the witch could show a little respect. If not to her queen, at least to another person.

The grin that twisted Jesiba’s mouth made her remember where she was. Remember her place. Queen or not, she wasn’t in charge here. But she’d be damned if she played the good little witch to this sorceress.

She suddenly thought of Ruhn, realizing his fondness for cursing had rubbed off on her. Ignoring the pang in her heart, she returned Jesiba’s smile.

“I assume you are aware of the various prophecies at play here,” Jesiba said, the unspoken “girl” successfully conveyed in her condescending tone.

Refusing to be baited, Hypaxia simply said, “I am the Witch Queen.”

“I’ll take that as a yes. Which means you’re aware of what role your lover is to take. Or, is it former lover? I’m afraid I haven’t kept up on the state of your affairs.”

Wanting to roll her eyes at the stupid double entendre, she let it and the insult go. “Of course I am aware. That is why I want him recruited.”

“Still?”

“Still.”

Jesiba ran her finger around the lip of her glass as she studied her. It made a wavering, melodic sound that left Hypaxia thinking of Ruhn again, and his sensitive hearing. She’d never considered herself a good singer, but he adored her voice. Whether she was speaking or singing, humming or moaning, he would sometimes close his eyes in appreciation.

“The union of the sword and blade is not something to be left in the hands of the fae. The Autumn King is a fool if he thinks otherwise.” Jesiba’s brusqueness tugged her out of the soft memories.

“The Prince is not a fool. And he is not a minion of his father.”

Those cold gray eyes were like shards of ice and Hypaxia felt her skin prickle. She knew Jesiba was skilled in all kinds of power. Witch magic as well as whatever ghastly practices she’d learned from the Under King. But Hypaxia had been taught by her mother, by the wise, old witch elders, and by the other ancient beings hidden in their mountains. Jesiba’s attempt to enter her mind would not work.

“I have nothing to hide Ms. Roga. Why don’t you just ask me your questions and we can both return to our work.”

The witch smiled that knife-like grin again, giving off a fleeting look that Hypaxia thought might be admiration. At her ability to keep Jesiba from shuffling through her thoughts or her bluntness, she wasn’t sure.

After another drink, Jesiba said, “Danaan is necessary. I don’t like it, but he’s necessary. As critical to our goal as his sister.”

At the mention of Bryce, Hypaxia caught another quick expression on the witch’s face, like that of a parent worried for her child. She’d seen it often enough on her own mother’s face to recognize it.

Jesiba continued. “Mirrors of the starborn siblings begot by Theia. Both of Theia’s daughters inherited their mother’s power, but not equally.”

Hypaxia wanted to argue that Ruhn had more to him than met the eye, perhaps even his own eye. But she didn’t. Those powers were his to wield. His to understand and develop. He’d kept them hidden for a reason and it was not her place to reveal them.

“Bryce is the horn,” Hypaxia said, knowing the prophecies as she’d already stated and hoping to shorten Jesiba’s lesson. “She will open the rift so we may dispose of the asteri and then seal it.”

“It’s not quite that simple.”

The previous disdain in Jesiba’s tone had returned. Her own annoyance bubbled close to the surface. Hypaxia knew damn well that it wasn’t that simple. The asteri were ancient, immensely powerful beings. “So why is the prince necessary? Beyond the sword?”

“The sword isn’t his.”

That stopped Hypaxia and she couldn’t help the shock that settled on her face. “What do you mean? He pulled it from the stone in Avallen.”

“It calls more strongly for Bryce. For her starlight.”

She held Jesiba’s icy stare, thinking, remembering the prophecies and the visions she’d just claimed to know. Running through all the arcane knowledge passed on from her mother. When it hit her, she felt her eyes widen. And saw another brief look of approval cross the witch’s face.

“He is the blade,” she whispered.

The approval disappeared as fast as it had come. Sorrow, genuine and unexpected, met Hypaxia’s gaze now.

Despite all her training, this had been a detail left unexplained. Either unknown by her witches, or unspoken.

The blade did not truly exist. Not literally. It was a metaphor. And like Helena’s sister, Theia’s lesser known daughter, the blade was to be the sacrifice.

Prince Pelias had killed the younger sister himself with the Starsword, joining her fractional amounts of starlight to his own to ensure the rift was sealed.  

Jesiba had known.

“I am sorry to be the bearer of such news,” Jesiba said, having the grace to continue looking sorry.

Hypaxia sat, silent and unmoving. Ruhn was to die for this rebellion to succeed.

She’d been under no illusions that most of them, or even any of them, would survive this. She wasn’t foolish. And yet, she’d allowed herself to fall in love with him. Let him become such a huge and necessary part of her life, that she didn’t want to imagine her life without him.

“He knows,” she croaked. “About the rebellion. He caught me meeting with Tharion and he overheard …” She trailed off. Jesiba wasn’t reacting. Which meant she’d already heard about it from Tharion. “Why are you telling me this? Why now?”

“Against my better judgment, I like you. I will never recognize you as my queen, but … I am pleased that you are leading the witches.”

Hypaxia didn’t reply, not sure if the admission was a veiled slight against her mother.

“Hel,” Jesiba went on with a harsh laugh, “I even like Danaan. You two are a good match.”

“Then why? Why refuse me every time I asked to bring him in?”

“I should think that is clear. Though, maybe my reputation has outgrown itself. I may be a coldhearted bitch, but I’m not entirely heartless.” After a pause, she said, “I knew you were growing close to him. Even if his role in this won’t be borne out for several years, making you live with that knowledge was not my first choice. With the loss of your mother still fresh, I didn’t think you should have to deal with another death.”

Another death.

Unbidden, a memory of her mother consumed Hypaxia. It was from shortly after she’d been diagnosed with her illness. Queen Hecuba didn’t look sick, which made the news harder to bear. And she didn’t seem concerned about the death sentence she’d just been given. Instead, she was calm and cool, like always, smiling at her daughter.

You will get through this, her mother had said, insisting on comforting others instead of seeking it. There will be worse to come. More battles to fight. But you will prevail. And at the end, you will not be alone.

At the time, she hadn’t considered that what her mother was saying might be prophetic. But now, she knew. It had been a vision. And while the words seemed vague, to a witch’s ears, they were anything but. From a mother to a daughter, the deeper meanings were obvious.

She blinked to find Jesiba still staring at her. Still examining her. There was no attempt to probe her mind again, just genuine curiosity. And anticipation.

“That’s not going to happen,” Hypaxia said forcefully, expecting some sort of dismissal. But Jesiba just smiled. What Hypaxia had once seen as contempt on the witch’s face, she now saw as respect. It was still that of an elder towards a student, a superior to an inferior. But it was there, genuine and appreciated. And it made her sit a little straighter.

“Good. That’s what I wanted to hear,” Jesiba said. “Bring him in. And do whatever the Hel it takes to get around that damn blade prophecy and make sure he lives. I’ll get you access to all of my resources.” Seemingly without thinking, Jesiba added, “You’re not the only one who would be devastated by his death.”

Bryce, Hypaxia realized, feeling stupid for not making the connection sooner. The only person Jesiba seemed to care about, despite her ridiculous threats to turn the woman into whatever low creature struck her fancy.

Jesiba rose to leave and reached the door as Hypaxia said, “Wait. If he agrees to become involved, I’m not hiding anything from him. He will be told everything.”

The witch shrugged. “That’s your call.” But her eyes narrowed and the air seemed to crackle around them in warning. “Telling Bryce is mine.” And with that, she was gone.

Under her breath, Hypaxia said, “You could have at least given me an idea of how to tell him.” Then, with a deep sigh, “Fuck.”

To be continued...

*****

Tagging @itach-i @queen-of-glass

Thanks for reading! If you’d like to be tagged let me know :)

Fanfic masterlist

[bltngames]

Review: Lloyd the Monkey 2

Back before TSSZ News imploded, I would often do write-ups for many of the games at the Sonic Amateur Games Expo (SAGE). SAGE is an annual online expo that I started all the way back in September of 2000. I personally ran SAGE for over a year, and remained deeply hands on for at least another two years as it continued to grow. The main focus of SAGE was primarily to showcase fangames, in particular Sonic fangames, but the event never limited itself to any one type of game. It's never been uncommon to see original games appear in the lineup -- especially now, given the modern indie scene. 

One such original game was Lloyd the Monkey, a bit of a strange game, written in Javascript of all things and run through a webpage. That by itself was notable enough to stand out from most of the games at SAGE, but Lloyd was also a completely original product created by someone who possibly seemed to be young and new to game development. Making games is no easy feat, especially when they’re written in Javascript and you’re doing tons of original artwork yourself. Taken as that whole, the game impressed me, even if it was more than a little rough around the edges.

Now we have Lloyd the Monkey 2, written in Unity. The developer, Noah Meyer, sent me a Steam key in order to review the game. Up top, I just want to say how I think it’s kind of brave to go all the way in putting the game on Steam and everything. It felt like just a few years ago, newer indie developers sort of had to work up to releasing their game on Steam, usually getting a few releases under their belt first. People view games differently when they’re asked to pay for them, and critics may not be so willing to let circumstances influence their review. It can be a harsh world out there for a beginner.

Lloyd 2 is a much bigger, more ambitious game than the first. Whereas the original Lloyd didn’t even have sound effects, Lloyd 2 introduces voiced cutscenes, some of which are full-on animated cinematics. Quality is about what you would expect -- I would assume the developer sought out friends and acquaintances to voice characters in Lloyd 2, leading to wildly varying audio quality due to differences in recording hardware. Lloyd himself sounds fine, but some of the other characters are a bit quiet, while others have clear background noise. Nothing I heard was unlistenable, however. 

The story is also a little hard to follow. Not much is done to refresh our memories as to who anyone is or what’s going on, we’re just kind of thrown into the middle of things and turned loose. On one hand, it’s nice that the story doesn’t slow the pace of the gameplay down too much. On the other, you’re given a map screen with different objectives to clear but there’s very little context as to what you’re doing or why. At one point I made my way to the end of a Power Plant level only to confront what appeared to be an evil monkey. Despite a whole cutscene involving a conversation between four or five different people, this evil monkey never seemed to say a single word. He just stood there in total silence with a sinister smile. Then I killed him.

I suppose maybe I missed something, however. With greater ambitions comes a number of unfortunate bugs in Lloyd 2, one of which happened not long after our monkey and his crew landed on planet Grecia. I entered what appeared to be a castle to talk to the Queen, but I think the game expected me to take a lower route, where I was apparently meant to overhear the Queen making secret preparations before my arrival. Instead, I took the direct route straight to her chambers, and triggered the cutscene with Lloyd standing in front of her while ominous music played, even though the camera was still clearly focused on the next floor down. I apparently still had some amount of control, because midway through her dialog I touched a teleporter that sent me to the game’s map screen before she was done talking. If that cutscene was meant to give context to what I was doing, I didn’t get a chance to see it.

That was one of the more harmless bugs in my time spent playing Lloyd 2. Harder to ignore was the fact that, within the first 30 seconds of getting control, I soft locked the game. Lloyd 2 opens with a short prologue section where you play as a man with black hair. If you decide to ignore the obvious and go left instead of right, you quickly run out of solid level tiles and begin falling indefinitely. Later areas feature invisible walls presumably to prevent this exact scenario, but for whatever reason they weren’t implemented in the prologue. 

For the most part, Lloyd 2 seems to be a co-op game. Many levels see Lloyd teamed up with an alien princess named Lura, with gameplay vaguely reminiscent of Mega Man X crossed with the tag mechanic from Sonic Mania’s Encore Mode. At the touch of a button, you can switch between the Swordsman Lloyd and the more projectile-based Lura… assuming your partner is still alive, I guess. While playing alone, your partner is controlled by artificial intelligence, but it’s incredibly basic and prone to accidentally committing suicide. That wouldn’t be such a big deal (considering Tails in Sonic 2 never acted in self-preservation either), but once your partner dies, they stay dead. Your only option to bring them back is to either restart the stage or hope another cutscene triggers, since they’ll magically spring back to life in order to say their dialog (though, again, usually only seconds before they fall back into the next death pit). 

This might not be much of a problem, depending on your viewpoint. There’s not much incentive to switch between Lloyd and Lura, so once you pick whoever you think works the best, chances are, you’ll just stick with them. You do unlock special team-up attacks after beating each boss, but this just reinforces the idea that Lloyd the Monkey 2 is meant to be experienced with another person holding a second controller, as most of the team-up attacks require both characters to do something specific that the single player artificial intelligence usually can’t interpret. Regardless, the team-up attacks never seem strictly necessary to progress, so they can be safely ignored if you’re playing solo.

I understand this is a pretty negative review I’ve written here. Lloyd the Monkey 2 aims high and tries to the best of its ability to get there. I assume it was a struggle to get even this far. Making games is hard work, and like any skill, takes practice to get good at. Just because this is Lloyd the Monkey 2 doesn’t mean Noah Meyer, its developer, is automatically an expert. I'm sure he's doing his best, and, quality aside, this game has a lot of heart put into it. This isn’t something cheap, quick, or lazy. It’s really, genuinely trying, and that matters. 

I’ve said a few times here and there that I see pieces of myself in the releases of Lloyd the Monkey, and I still see them here. I remember, for an early SAGE event, I was working on a fangame project of mine called The Fated Hour. I was probably already a year or two or maybe even three deep in the game by now, and after a lot of hyping up the community, this was their first chance to play the game. I spent months and months coding this iteration of my engine, and by my standards back then, it seemed like bleeding edge technology. I felt like I was going to blow everyone's minds. 

It was a mess. Few were impressed. Even worse, the game straight up didn’t even run correctly for some people. What followed was multiple patches, and even rebuilding some entire areas from scratch. My ambitions got the better of me and I unintentionally cut corners -- not because I was trying to cheap out on doing proper development, but just because I simply didn’t know any better. I may have done the best I knew how to do, but I was running faster than my body could keep up with and I stumbled.

When I see things like the missing invisible walls in the prologue, or how easily partner characters commit suicide by accident, I think back to that demo for The Fated Hour, and how I've been in this exact place myself. There’s even a side quest in Lloyd 2 where you have to track a floating girl as she drifts through a level -- there was a nearly identical set piece in The Fated Hour, where you were chasing a robot. It’s a very strange feeling to see something like that and think, “I’ve been here before.” Like looking through a window at a younger version of yourself.

It’s true that I stumbled, but I didn’t let that stop me. I learned by doing. I kept going. Three years later, a game of mine was featured on TV, leading to more than a million downloads. The mistakes of past projects did not weigh me down and I soldiered onwards, newfound knowledge in hand. 

So where does that leave us with Lloyd the Monkey 2, then. Well, it's not exactly a game to compete with Super Mario Odyssey, but given the circumstances in which it was created, I don't think that's necessarily the point. As a learning experience clearly made for the fun of its own creation, I think it's a success. And who knows what awaits in the years to come?

[recentanimenews]

Bookshelf Briefs 9/30/20

Accomplishments of the Duke’s Daughter, Vol. 6 | By Reai and Suki Umemiya | Seven Seas – Another series down to “once a year” release—I had to jog my memory at the start to recall what had been happening. Many things are going wrong for our heroine, who is trying to be strong and tough but is also starting to break down, and I felt that the scenes with her and Dean struck just the right balance of comforting and letting the heroine cry without making her seem weaker. This sets the stage for her comeback, which is extraordinary. (And also has a corrupt Church, a constant in Japanese light novels, though at least here there are also honest and good religious people in it.) That said, eventually Dean’s identity will come out, and I do wonder how this very good “villainess” isekai will handle it. – Sean Gaffney

The Ancient Magus’ Bride: Jack Flash and the Faerie Case Files, Vol. 1 | By Yu Godai, Mako Oikawa, and Kore Yamazaki | Seven Seas – A faerie switched at birth for a human child, Jack never fit in in either world. Only in the mortal realm could she earn money for anime collectibles, however, so she decided to make herself into a tough, capable woman like her literary heroes and set up shop as a detective. Together with her fellow changeling, Larry the werewolf, Jack takes on supernatural cases in New York City. In this volume, Lindel tasks them with tracking down a missing dragon egg. I liked the resources Jack uses to obtain information, which include a dapper theatre ghost and a spell with components of rat whiskers and taxi tires because “Nobody out there knows this city better than them.” I still found this a bit hard to get into, though, especially the parts involving a perpetually tearful off-off-off-off-Broadway actress and her pickpocket boyfriend. Still, I will check out volume two! – Michelle Smith

Black Clover, Vol. 22 | By Yuki Tabata | Viz Media – At long last, this interminable arc comes to an end. I enjoyed a lot of it, but I cannot deny it should have been about two volumes shorter. Most of the book is taken up by shonen battles, with the villain being nigh unkillable, the heroes almost breaking themselves to stop him, etc. Fortunately, the day is saved, and even the Wizard King turns out to be… sort of alive again? Shota fans should be happy. Asta fans perhaps less so—the sheer amount of damage done to the kingdom in this arc means someone has to be blamed, and give Asta has the “dark evil magic” it’s gonna be him, especially when he takes the incredibly obvious bait they use to get him to fight. Oh well, if Asta were smart, this wouldn’t be Black Clover. – Sean Gaffney

Don’t Toy with Me, Miss Nagatoro, Vol. 3 | By Nanashi | Vertical Comics – Part of the problem with titles like this and the other teasing works (Takagi-san less so as Nishikata doesn’t fall into the category) is that they are, at heart, the classic “extroverted girl acts overtly extroverted to bring introverted guy out of their shell,” and that’s not really a plot that feels comfortable in the Gen Z days, where you’re more likely to say “why doesn’t she just let him be in his quiet, safe space?” And by she I mean they, as Nagatoro’s two friends appear far more often here, which offers some good two-way teasing action, as they clearly see her crush on him, if not why. It’s still sort of hard to read, but if you pretend he’s more OK with it than he actually is, this is cute. – Sean Gaffney

Failed Princesses, Vol. 1 | By Ajiichi | Seven Seas – The concept of “popular girl meets unpopular girl” is a common one in yuri manga, and we do indeed hit several of its tropes in this first volume. The amusing thing is that Kanade, the shy outcast girl, is perfectly aware of how things are supposed to go, and keeps pulling back a bit to try to save Nanaki from, well, making herself an outcast by associating with the wrong people. The best part of the volume is that Nanaki really doesn’t give two shits about any of that, and seems set on making Kanade her best friend… and also making her over, which backfires a bit as Kanade cleans up nicely. I hear this gets a bit dramatic later, but for the moment it’s a cute and fluffy proto-yuri story. – Sean Gaffney

In/Spectre, Vol. 12 | By Kyo Shirodaira and Chashiba Katase | Kodansha Comics – The first story in this volume is another “Rikka tries to make people understand Kotoko is an evil Machiavellian schemer,” this time with one of her ex-classmates, but again the response seems to be “we know she’s a manipulative bitch, but she’s a good person anyway.” The larger story, which will continue into the next book, seems to be a chance to write Kuro and Kotoko as an actual romance, as the man we meet here and his relationship with a yuki-onna… as well as his penchant for attracting misfortune… very much parallel them. That said, they’re very cute together, which is why I hope he avoids the murder charge he’s now being investigated for. Still a favorite. – Sean Gaffney

Interviews with Monster Girls, Vol. 8 | By Petos | Kodansha Comics – The author knows what people want to see, but also knows that the best way to get readers is to drive them crazy by not showing it. We finally get what we’ve been begging for here, as Tetsuo asks Sakie out on a date. (This is after rejecting Kyouko’s love confession, both because she’s his student and also, as he is forced to admit, as he likes Sakie.) The stage is set for the date… and the rest of the book is thus spent with the three main student girls going to Kyouko’s for a fireworks viewing and meeting her family. They’re good chapters, and I really liked showing how difficult Kyouko has it as a dullahan in terms of everyday life, but GOD, please get back to the teachers, I beg you! – Sean Gaffney

Kaguya-sama: Love Is War, Vol. 16 | By Aka Akasaka | Viz Media – The series has gotten to the point where the more rewarding chapters are the ones as part of a larger arc. Not that the one-shot chapters are bad—though Maki’s journey to India may be the most pointless thing in this entire series to date, we do get Chika’s iconic “shut up or I’ll kill you” here. But the larger arcs, featuring Miyuki and Kaguya attempting to date without interruptions, and setting up Ishigami and Iino for a romance—though given the number of limbs broken in this book, and Iino’s own horrible lack of self-awareness, it may be a ways out—are better. This series is still hilarious, but we’ve come to read it more for the heartwarming moments. Heck, there’s even some serious drama here. Very good. – Sean Gaffney

Nineteen | By Ancco | Drawn & Quarterly – Although it was translated and released second in English, Nineteen is a precursor to Ancco’s internationally award-winning manhwa Bad Friends. The volume collects thirteen short comics originally published in Korea over a decade ago which absolutely remain relevant to today’s world. While understandably not as polished as some of Ancco’s later work—one can observe her style evolving and growing over the course of the collection (which is fascinating)—the comics still carry significant emotional weight and impact. Nineteen includes diary comics, which tend to be more lighthearted, as well as harder-hitting fictional stories, many of which also have autobiographical inspiration. As a whole, the collection explores themes of young adulthood, growing up, and complicated family relationships. In particular, there is a compelling focus on the relationships among daughters, mothers, and grandmothers. Some of the narratives can be rather bleak, but a resigned sense of humor threads through Nineteen, too. – Ash Brown

Ran the Peerless Beauty, Vol. 8 | By Ammitsu | Kodansha Comics (digital only) – Shoujo manga that has couples getting together BEFORE the end of the series is inevitably going to have an arc dealing with how far the lead couple should go now that they’re dating, and this is Ran’s turn, as she and Akira and their friends go to a beach house Ran’s family owns and have some beach fun. Unfortunately, the cast gets winnowed down one by one until it’s just the two of them… and her overprotective father, who arrives in time to provide the cliffhanger and no doubt ensure that nookie does not ensue. Not that I think it should—these two kids are even purer than the couple from Kimi ni Todoke, and I think they should mature a bit more before going further. Plus, watching them blush and kiss is wonderful. – Sean Gaffney

Spy x Family, Vol. 2 | By Tatsuya Endo | Viz Media – Having spent our first volume establishing that our found family can really come to love each other deep down, this volume shows off how they are also, at heart, fundamentally awkward and unable to socialize normally. This is unsurprising—hints of Loid’s life we’ve seen show him as a war orphan, Yor is a contract killer, and Anya basically grew up being experimented on by bad guys. As the school soon finds, this leads to issues. The second half of the book introduces Yor’s sister-obsessed little brother Yuri, who turns out to be a torture expert for Loid’s enemies. As always, half the fun is that everyone except Anya has no idea who their real selves are, and the cliffhanger tells us we’re in for some hilarious family fun. I love this. – Sean Gaffney

Spy x Family, Vol. 2 | By Tatsuya Endo | VIZ Media – After a brief spell atop the waiting list, Anya officially makes it into Eden Academy. Loid is anxious to progress to the next stage of his mission and, believing there’s not much chance in turning Anya into an elite scholar like his agency wants, focuses instead on having her befriend the younger son of his target. It does not go to plan, of course. Anya is very cute in this volume, and I also really appreciated how Loid genuinely listens to Yor and values her input. The arrival of Yor’s brother, a member of the secret police, is going to be a fun complication, and another cast member with a secret, but my favorite part of this series is probably always going to be how much love these three are already feeling for each other. So unique and good! – Michelle Smith

Sword Art Online: Hollow Realization, Vol. 6 | By Tomo Hirokawa, based on the story by Reki Kawahara | Yen Press – The weakness of this manga is the same as always—it’s written to tie into the games, and features several characters I just don’t recognize, which can be a problem given this is the big final let’s-save-the-world ending. That said, this is still a decent SAO title. Kirito gets to be cool and badass, but because this isn’t written just by Kawahara others do as well, and it’s a nice balanced effort that focuses on heroine Premiere. I also really liked the point where all the NPCs are worried when everyone has to log out for several days for maintenance. While I’ll still remember this as the “SAO only everyone is alive” manga, I enjoyed reading it, when I wasn’t confused. – Sean Gaffney

By: Ash Brown

[screamingatanemptyroom]

I Can’t Eat Love Pt 6

Here is the next part! Please Enjoy! 

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5  linked here

____________________________

The next week was brutal. 

Each day I would get up before dawn, moving to my office to get started as soon as possible. Reading, studying, I was trying to learn a lifetime of knowledge at a breakneck pace. I still was piecing together bills and tax documents, working with Hallers to consolidate all the debt I could. Fortunately, as I was still in good standing with the Royal family, the interest and repayment plans were very generous.

I stayed locked in that tiny room, only to pause whenever Hallers brought up a meal, an increasingly worried expression on his face with each passing day.

“Miss, you must sleep!” He broke his professional silence on the fourth day, as he walked in late into the night, finding me reading a chapter on historical government forms while taking notes by candlelight. I glanced up, surprised to see him still dressed up in a proper butler uniform despite the late hour.

“Hallers, I’m sorry, did I wake you? I just have a few more pages… and then there’s still the letters from the Eastern section of Duchy….” I leaned back, rubbing my eyes with a yawn. “You might as well go to bed. I’ll make sure to blow the candle out when I finish.”

 He stood his ground, looking determined. “No, Miss.”  He picked up the candle, ignoring my squawk of protest. “I cannot let you run yourself into the ground. You cannot save this Duchy in the space of a week.”

“But… I …”

“The work will be waiting for you in the morning. But for now, please, I’m begging you… go to sleep?” He looked so miserable, I found myself nodding without realizing it.

“Fine. I’ll do this in the morning.”

I went off to bed, hiding a smile. When was the last time someone worried about whether or not I slept?

Beyond the work I had to do between lessons and the financial organization, there was still the matter of the corruption within the Duchy to deal with.

“Hallers?” Early in the week, I called him into the office.

 He stood at attention, waiting.  “Yes, Miss?”

I handed him a paper. “I need you, or someone you would trust with your life, to go into the city. In the Northwest square you will find a man who sits under a blue awning named “Rig.” Hand him this note, and tell him that you will purchase the information requested within for 50 crowns.”

Despite the oddity of the request, Hallers was a professional, his only reaction a single raised eyebrow “Is that all?”

“No.” I sighed. “He will demand at least twice the amount offered. You are to refuse this and tell him that ‘Angel’ sent you.”

“Who is this ‘Angel’, miss?”

“No one.” I laughed. “It’s a code, which only his inner circle know. If you say this, it will allow you to purchase the information I need for that price. He will tell you when you can retrieve it.”

Who would have thought that the knowledge I had earned being one of Rig’s info runners while living on the street would be helpful so quickly? I had hated the man at the time, but even I had to admit that he was the best when it came down to tracking down things others wanted to hide.

“It will be done.” With a short bow, he turned to leave. I called after him. 

“Oh, and Hallers?” When he paused, I added, “Postpone any meeting with our men involved in tax collection/counting until after you have what I requested.”

“It will be helpful to you?”

I grinned evilly. “Let’s just say I don’t believe in going into battle without a weapon.”

____________________________

Despite the drastic change in my schedule, my parents remained completely unaware. My Father, relieved that he didn’t have to pretend to care about the paperwork anymore, went riding and hunting, enjoying himself thoroughly. As long as he wasn’t spending money, I was content to let him be. As for my mother… fortunately she had been visiting her family in the South since my reawakening, and was not scheduled to return for another month. I was curious to see my mother, since my last words to her were on her deathbed. Our relationship was strained at best, however, and I need to figure out how to approach her.

The Duke and Duchess may not have been concerned with the abrupt changes I had made in my life, but it had not gone unnoticed by others. 

“What’s come over you, Miss?” my maid Angela shook her head, frustrated as she assisted me undressing one evening. “You dress so simply these days. You never go to the Royal palace gardens or visit Lady Edith anymore! Is there something wrong?”

I smiled at her grumbling. In my previous life, whenever I hadn’t been trying to perfect my etiquette lessons, I had wandered the Royal Gardens with Edith, hoping to catch a glimpse of the Prince. It seemed so silly, so empty now.

 I shook my head. “Everything is fine. Mrs. Rendler simply increased the difficulty of my etiquette lessons, and I have a lot of work to do to catch up.”

“You don’t have to work so hard, though!” She muttered, putting away my gown. “It’s not as if…” She trailed off, as if realizing what she was about to say.

It’s not as if I’ll ever get to be Queen. Of course, I know that… but how does she? I smiled, the expression cold. “Angela. Are you saying I shouldn’t do my best at preparing to be Queen?”

She panicked slightly, backing away. “No, of course not! I – I just want you to be happy.”

I kept my eyes on her own, appreciating the fear I saw there. “I appreciate the concern.”

I placed the confrontation to the back of my mind, refusing to think it through to its conclusion, but things were stirred up once more by a an unexpected encounter towards the end of the week, the day before my next trip tot the palace. She showed up unannounced, barging into my office, with Hallers trailing behind, a disapproving expression on his face at her intrusion.

“Lenora! What’s going on?!” She was a beautiful girl. Golden hair, light colored eyes, long lashes… she looked as if she had stepped out of a storybook, exactly what I thought a princess should look like.

“Edith.” The name felt wrong to say out loud after so long.

____________________________

“EDITH!” I sobbed, falling to my knees in front of her.  “You have to help me!”

She stared at me silently with glassy eyes, a polite smile hiding any deeper emotion.

Exhausted, starving, I reached out a hand towards her.

“Please, mother, father… they’re both gone… I lost my job with the seamstress… someone told them I had stolen something... I don’t know what to do!”

My hand grasped empty air instead of her skirt. She had stepped back out of my reach.

“What do you expect me to do?” Her words were lifeless, she stared at me as if I were an insect, rather than her childhood friend.

I held my grumbling stomach, hating that I looked so pathetic and weak. “Can you talk to the Queen…?”

“She refuses to hear your name.” Edith interrupted, a small gleam in her eye. “She heard the kind of dirty crimes you committed on the street, and says that you are dead to her.”

Dead? Dead.  Dead… the word repeated itself in my mind over and over, like a chant. Was that the woman who had called me her daughter, who said she loved me?

“That can’t be true! I’ve not committed any crimes. Why would she… say that? I can’t believe it!”

“Well it’s true.” Edith sighed, looking around as if searching for an excuse to leave. “Was there anything else?”

I looked back at her, lost, confused. I was so hungry. Can you help me find work? Or at least give me something to eat?”

“Sorry,” She didn’t look sorry. “My father has forbidden that I be around you anymore. He’s worried it will effect my reputation as the future Queen.” 

“What are you saying?” I stared at my only friend in the world, feeling the shattered remnants of my heart break even further.

“Goodbye, Lenora.” Refusing to look at me anymore, she walked away.

“EDITH!”

____________________________

“I haven’t seen you in days!” Edith smiled brightly, the expression turning my stomach. “I missed you!”

Her act wasn’t extremely convincing this time, to a more experienced eye. Her smile was a little too stiff, her eyes cold and calculating as they looked around the room, trying to determine what I had been up to. Even as she told me she missed me her voice seemed more irritated then sad, as if she were frustrated that I had made her do the work instead of going to her as I usually did.

 I returned her smile. “I’ve missed you too!” Standing up from my desk, I reached out, giving her a hug.

I was a much better actress.

“What are you doing? I’ve heard you’ve been locked away in this room for days!” She grabbed my hands, a true look of concern crossing her face.

“Really? Who did you hear it from?”

She balked at that question. “Oh you know… just around.”

“I see.” I looked over at Hallers with a frown, who looked furious. He nodded to me briefly and left, likely to interrogate the staff regarding who had been gossiping about my activities. I let him go, although I already had my own suspicions.

 I brought Edith away from my desk and papers, not wishing for her to see any of the Duchy’s financial numbers, and sat us down on some chairs near the fireplace. I didn’t bother ringing for tea, I knew Hallers would have already arranged it.

“What brings you here?” I asked, keeping my voice casual and polite.

Edith laughed. “What nonsense! As if I needed a reason to see my friend. I was hoping we could spend some time together, perhaps walk through the gardens?”

“I see.” I nodded, thinking it over. She wanted to see the prince, I suppose.

 “So can we go?”

“Well, not today because I have to finish some work here, or tomorrow because I have to attend my lessons with the Queen.” I noted the angry flash in her eyes at the mention of my royal etiquette lessons, but continued without comment. “Perhaps next week we can walk through the gardens.”

She looked disappointed. “Next week?”

“And perhaps I can arrange for us to have tea with the prince.” I laughed as her demeanor brightened. “Wouldn’t that be fun?!” 

“Well, if I wouldn’t be in the way…” She trailed off, watching me slyly.

“Of course not.” 

How many times had these conversations happened before? How many times did I unknowingly bring her to see my fiancé, allowing them to grow closer, sealing my own fate. Well, go with my blessing this time, Edith. I don’t want him.

Edith, unaware of my inner thoughts, seemed relieved. “Alright then, that would be fun! I just worry about you, Lenora! Don’t work too hard in this dreary little room! If you don’t go spend as much time with the Prince as possible he might lose interest!” Her hand rested on my arm. I struggled to not fling her off. “Trust me.”

I hid all my feelings deep inside, smiling brightly for her to see. “Of course I trust you.”

[blackasmidnightcats]

Book 1 Nostalgia

WARNING: This post will have spoilers to the SGE series

The first book in any series will always hold a special place in anyone's heart I think. There is just something beautiful, whether the writing was phenomenal or lacking, about the introduction to a new world and the characters that you're going to know. After reading further into the series, sometimes you just wanna go back to the start, where everything was a lot simpler.

SGE kinda falls into this feeling for me.

I don't think I'm ever going to get over the interactions between the characters (and we haven't even explored most of them) because, personally, Soman is incredibly good with how he does character intercations but the story and plot have a lot to improve on.

And now comparing TSY with TCY it's very glaring.

Soman really has a problem with his plot so much so than with his storyline. It's very repetitive and the storyline suffers from it.

After Book 1, every plot seemed to be the same case; Sophie is an important piece to the main villain, Agatha tries to fix everything, Tedros is getting more crap than needed, annoyingly unhealthy romantic relationships are explored, and the other characters do things.

The last of these examples are really the only things that varies. Everything else is almost always the same in one way or another.

The first book doesn't really follow that pattern. It's a introductory book and I wish Soman did the same vibe as it in QfG.

Though Book 1 wasn't perfect. My biggest main problem with it was how Soman handled Agatha's development from thinking herself a freak and realizing that she was just a beautiful as anyone else (and Tagatha, of course. They had a very unconvincing start) compared to the detailed and precise handling of Sophie's decent and eventual acceptance her wickedness.

I said it once and I'll say it again: I miss vengeful, spited Sophie. Who made the School for Good suffer because Tedros didn't keep his promise and her very impressive Talent to summon Evil creatures at will to do her bidding.

This was the Sophie that I expected more from in the later books but might never get again. With the way that the OTK cover portrays her as the Lion, whether that would be a thing or not, it's clear that Soman wants the readers to look at Sophie in a better light and not as the anti-hero that she is but I could be wrong.

In Book 1, Sophie was incredibly selfish to the point that she wouldn't do anything for others even those that she should care about (i.e. Tedros in the Trial) and in the end, she had to pay for the selfishness by seeing just how Evil she could become and be seen as the witch that she was. Her development from Pink Princess to Witch of Woods Beyond was believable; her ambitiousness combined with her selfishness was what made her gain everything through manipulation and wickedness but it couldn't be hidden for long. Once everyone, including herself, saw what lied underneath her exterior, she lost everything and because of the things that she chooses to do, she naturally hurt and attacked the people that wronged her just as Evil does.

It was caused by a failed romantic pursuit, yes, but unlike the other later romantic relations that she had, the one in Book 1 focused more on the outcome for her character development than in the relationship itself. Honestly her relationships with Rafal, and Rhian, and maybe now Japeth, idk, make absolutely no sense with the importance that the story puts on it because these relationships didn't help further Sophie's character development. It stunted her really.

Now compare this to Agatha.

I think everyone and their cats agree that we all miss witchy Agatha in book 1 and I hope we write more of her in our fanfics like that since Soman won't do it. The thing is, with Agatha, unlike Sophie, whether she is written as a straight-up hero or as a sort of anti-villain with her portrayal as the Snake in the OTK cover, it won't be that far fetched. I don't know if Soman intended this or not but it's pretty frickin impressive with how he managed to make Agatha a pretty versatile character.

Book 1 did not to good with how she went from Graveyard Girl to Fairy Tale Princess. At most, we saw her heroic characteristics but Soman didn't put much effort with making it believable and we were left to our own imaginations with how she could have believably developed and grown into herself. It should have taken more than one chapter to make us believe that Agatha suddenly grew confident with herself and her own brand of beauty and how her relationship with Tedros should have started.

But because of the fact that she's now comfortable as both being a little different and unique in her own way but is still guided by the values of Good and holds it dear to her soul as well as her loyalty to those she loves, she can do great with the best of both worlds.

Agatha hasn't stopped growing since book 1 and I think that reason for that is because Soman knows that he has to square up whenever he writes her. Whether she's developing on her own or with others, she's always learning new values and finding ways to express them in the way that she's comfortable with.

Soman does express that he loves writing in Sophie's POV the most, but it can be a double edged sword if not careful. And I think Soman hasn't been careful.

Now back to the glory of Book 1.

Book one had the most simplest plot and most fluent storyline than in any other book. Even TLEA.

I think I could recall a lot more events in Book 1 than in the more recent ones because there was a lot more events and chapters that were actually necessary to the plot.

So, to go by statistics;

TLEA has the most recorded chapters in the series as of current before the release of OTK with 35 chapters and 3 parts to divide it.

It's followed by Book 1 with 30 chapters.

Then QfG is next with 28 chapters divided into 2 parts.

And aCoT follows with 27 chapters and 2 parts as well.

Last is AWWP with 24 chapters divided into 2 parts as well.

If going by this then OTK should either have a chapter or two more or less than TLEA but not less so than Book 1 because it's going to now be the official last book of the the series.

But that is besides the point. My main problem with the books' storytelling after Book 1 is how disoriented it has become.

Let me make an example with QfG and aCoT. These books are more or less very similar with each other in the number of chapters with only one being the difference while the start of the the "Part 2" portion was a bit different with QfG's starting at chapter 21 while aCoT's started with chapter 17.

But the reception and the fluency of these two books could not be more different from each other.

To say that QfG completely destroyed the fandom is an understatement. I can't tell of aCoT managed to regain the series's former glory for long enough to not let OTK flop but let's be hopeful.

Anyways, the fluency of the storytelling with TCY was wack and QfG and aCoT completely show that.

WARNING: Spoilers about QfG and aCoT will be discussed in this section.

I could not remember almost 70% of QfG because of how much I hated the plot and looking back at the chapters, I honestly could not believe that the asshat Rhian was only introduced on Chapter 21. Everything after Chaddick's POV chapter seemed to be a blur and Rhian's b*tch ass seemed to have corrupted the whole experience.

8 chapters. He was only in QfG for 8 chapters and yet it feels almost like he's been in it for more than half. Frick. He is traumatizing.

Basically, the middle part of the book, namely chapters 7 to 20, was all about the main cast trying to frickin understand wtf was happening. Agatha and Sophie were trying to figure out the Lion and the Snake thing while Tedros was back in Camelot doing (or failing or being sabotaged with) politics and also trying to understand why tf was Excalibur having a tantrum.

Then Rhian entered and I don't know why or how Nottingham and Robin Hood got involved but he did.

And then more figuring out stuff and sabotaging Tedros and then Rhian and Excalibur and then cliffhanger.

It was all very abrupt and confusing. More confusion was added all because there were more questions asked than actual answers and a sense of depression was felt in the end because nothing was really achieved.

Imma compare this with Book 1 later but first Book 5 comparison.

Now aCoT. It was just the storyline that we needed to get back to the hype that the series had. Was it a satisfying read? Yes but was it able to heal the pain that QfG inflicted? No.

The fandom did not come back the same again.

But anyways, aCoT, personally, had a lot more scenes and events that I remembered than in any other book besides book 1 but that there was the problem with this book.

Too many things happened with this book. So much so that the fluency of the story was sacrificed to tell it.

Look at it this way, several shifts in the book happened.

This all happened in Part 1 only;

Rhian became King and his regime was sort of explained.

Agatha was introduced to the First Years and got her Army.

Sophie was in some sort of GOT-esque knock off experience as Rhian's Captive Queen.

Agatha manages to save some of her friends.

The concept of OTK was explained.

Tedros's execution was on way.

Nevermind, Agatha and her army just straight-up hijacked it.

Prof. Dovey died as a sacrifice.

Okay, now to Part 2;

Reaper is a Gnome King.

The Crystal of Time was finally explained.

They finally find out about Rhian and Japeth's origins.

The Gnomes were ambushed and I feel sorry for them.

Sophie tipped Rhian off with the location because she believed that she would end it all.

We kinda get background with why Rhian wants to be OTK????

Rhian DIES?!?!?! and now Japeth's King ☠

They sort of manage to know about wtf happened with the Lady and Japeth

Tedros and Arthur have a heart to heart and he gets the Ring of Power.

Cliffhanger

It's a lot to take in and I don't really think that Soman should have cramped it all in one book.

Some of the plot points should have been in QfG so that it wouldn't be as depressing.

The whole of Part one was a book in itself and Part 2 was one as well.

At some points of the book, I sometimes got the feeling that it was gonna be the end but it just kept going and going and now I don't really know what's left with OTK. It can be both a good thing or a horrible thing.

Let's see wtf happens. I expect more action than drama Soman.

So again with Book 1.

Book 1 was a classic and the ideas easily hooked anyone interested.

It had the same unaswered questions with QfG but why did it suceed when QfG didn't.

First, is that Book 1 had its atmosphere clear from the start of the book. It was clear that the main thing that needed to happen was that Sophie and Agatha needed to realize the actual nature of their souls. There were more technical questions that needed to be answered but the main point that needed to be addressed was addressed by the end of the book.

And also the ending was also a cliffhanger but it a much lighter note.

Sophie and Agatha realized their capabilities and understood themselves but they still chose each other in the end and that sort of gave way to a much hopeful future for the two of them. (At that time, at least)

All the while, QfG was one depressing ball of events that led to one horrible moment to the other.

It was just sad.

And so I kinda go back to Book 1 from time to time to refresh myself with why I started this series to begin with and I'm always reminded with the possibilities and the explorations about good and evil and the complex duality of differences and parallels that so many things that Sophie and Agatha sort of beautifully personify.

I love reading the very first chapter of Book 1 because it so beautifully captured Sophie and Agatha and their complex relationship that I've always wanted to read in other books.

I always loved reading Sophie's amusing thought process and the reason why she does everything that she does; she does it because she believes that she deserves more and she'll everything to get it.

I also loved how Agatha was such a character that I've always wanted to read about. She's spunky and shy and lonely and reflective and despite everyone shunning her, she could still see the good and find it in herself to help them. She was simply wonderful.

I'm thankful that I found this series and I hope that a lot more books can talk about the philosophies and concepts that this book has managed to introduce. And despite all of its set-backs and nonsense, I would still recommend this as a read but to that they should also think about what they've read and maybe talk about what they've found interesting with it.

[h-styles-babes]

ONE

It had been a year since Anastasia had even been in the same room as him.

A year since he’d sat her down and told her that maybe them not being together anymore was for the best. His life was too crazy for him to even really handle, and he felt it was unfair to her to have such a strain on their relationship. Never mind that they’d been in said relationship for nearly two years already and had been friends for nearly a decade more. And at the time, she’d understood his want to not ruin their friendship with heartbreak and fights and nasty words that might come down the road. That didn’t mean her heart hadn’t broken when they’d said their final goodbyes to each other, sharing a last kiss before Harry left her flat. But it was the sort of heartbreak that she could live with because they’d agreed to still be there for each other when they needed it.

Of course, that hadn’t happened. She’d not heard a peep out of him since he walked out of her little home in the center of London.

She figured it wouldn’t have hurt so bad if she hadn’t seen the tabloids with his face splashed across them, his arms wrapped around a certain American model/reality TV star just a few months later. He’d not even told her of the hiatus the band was slated for, though there was no way he hadn’t known about it himself at that point. So, yeah, she was absolutely livid to see him having the time of his life on a yacht in St. Bart’s with the reality princess who thought she stood a chance in the modeling business because her family was famous for absolutely nothing and infamous for just about everything else.

If Harry had tried to get into contact with her after that, she wouldn’t have known, because she changed her number, and blocked him from her social media sites, and sent his emails straight to junk if he ever tried to reach her that way. She’d heard from her mum once around his birthday that he had been back to Holmes Chapel and was asking after her, but her mum knew how she felt about him. She’d been polite in saying that Sia was doing well, working in London and slated for a promotion. When he’d asked for her new number, her mother, bless her, had declined, citing that it wasn’t a good idea. She’d said he understood, but Sia wasn’t quite sure if that was the whole story. It didn’t matter, really.

Anastasia did end up with that promotion, which sent her to LA for at least a year. She’d panicked at first, knowing that Harry had a semi-permanent residence there, but she realized that the likelihood of them running into each other was just about as good as her meeting Elvis. LA was big and she was low man on the totem pole in her line of work—which just so happened to be pretty close to Harry’s—and she was sure she wouldn’t be trusted on projects with someone as big as Harry Styles, so there was no reason for their paths to ever cross.

Except they did, around late August. She’d had a blissful five months of living in LA without seeing hide nor hair of her ex-boyfriend/ex-best friend, and she had counted her lucky stars each day that she got by unscathed. But, when it finally came to the time where she saw him in a pub on a random Saturday night—the only respectable pub in a twenty mile radius of her home—she knew her luck had run out.

She froze as she entered the bar, seeing his recently shorn locks—which were a bit of a shock to her, since she’d avoided anything involving Harry Styles since she’d seen that God forsaken article about him on the yacht—tucked into a booth in the corner, surrounded by a few other lads who’s faces looked vaguely familiar. She had a feeling she knew one of them from a telly program she used to watch back in the UK, but she couldn’t be quite sure in the dim lighting of the room. She quickly contemplated walking right back out of the building and not looking back, but she’d be damned if she let him scare her from the one place she found solace on her weekends. She’d been coming here since she moved to America, and she’d drop dead before she let the likes of him run her off.

She shook herself out of it quickly, and made her way to the bar, slinking herself down into an empty stool, as far away from Harry as possible, not facing him, so on the off chance that he’d glance up, he’d not see her face. She ordered two shots of tequila right off the bat, the bartender, who she’d gotten to know pretty well over the last few months, raised an eyebrow at her request, but fulfilled it anyway. Sia was typically a pint sort of girl, from years of being around Harry’s bandmates and her own parents enjoying a pint on the weekends, but she needed something stronger to ease her nerves. Pints were for when she was ready to wind down from a long work week. Liquor was for trying to calm her nerves after seeing her ex for the first time in a year in a random pub in LA.

She threw back the two shots quickly, wiping the corners of her mouth where a little dribbled out. She pushed the two glasses back from her and the bartender shook a pint glass at her, asking silently if she’d like her regular now.

Suddenly hearing Harry’s boisterous laugh in the corner set her on edge all over again, her shoulders raising up protectively around her ears. She bore down on her teeth as she glanced over, seeing his head tossed back, mouth open in laughter. 

God, he’s still so fucking beautiful, she thought bitterly.

Turning back to the bartender, she shook her head. “Martini, please. Strong.”

“One of those nights, huh?” he asked, a sad little smile on her face as he poured the liquor in a tumbler.

“It wasn’t until about ten minutes ago,” she grumbled, throwing a pointed glare toward Harry’s table. They had quieted down again, but Harry was still grinning, that grin that used to set Anastasia’s heart into a tizzy and make her grin back at him, stupidly in love.

“You got a problem with those lads?” he asked, pouring Sia’s drink into a martini glass, spearing two olives into it. The bartender—Eric—was a Scotland native relocated to LA when his wife’s job called for it. He was the only person in LA who Sia had met that she could relate to when talking about home. Sure they weren’t from the same place, exactly, but he still held his roots, like Anastasia, as opposed to other people from the UK she’d met that would rather act like home no longer meant anything to them.

“Not all of ‘em, no,” she shook her head, offering him a wry smile as she accepted her drink. “Just the one at the end facin’ this way.”

“Old one night stand?” he guessed while pouring a beer for the customer next to her.

She shook her head with a scoff. “I wish. Best friend turned boyfriend, turned ex-boyfriend turned ex-best friend.”

“Ouch,” he hissed, making a wounded look with his face.

Anastasia gave a humorless chuckle as she sipped at the strong drink. “I know. Haven’t even seen his face in a year.”

“He’s that Styles lad, right? From that boyband?”

“The one and only,” she confirmed, nodding solemnly. “Told me it was better we weren’t together ‘cause him bein’ away wasn’t fair to me or our relationship. Few months later, I see his mug pasted all over mags lovin’ on that model girl. Proper kicked him out of my life after that.”

“Jesus, darlin’,” Eric whistled. “Surprised yeh stuck around after seein’ him when yeh walked in here.”

She sighed, pulling the speared olives out of her drink. “Me too, but this is my spot. He can’t have it.” She pulled one off and popped it in her mouth, chewing and swallowing before continuing. “Twat gets everything else he wants. This is mine, though. Long as he doesn’t see me, we’re good.”

Eric began nodding as Anastasia popped the second olive in her mouth. His eyes trailed over to the table her ex was sat at, only to see that the lad’s eyes were trained on her, brows furrowed and mouth popped open in some expression he couldn’t decipher. He didn’t want to burst her bubble, but he felt he owed it to her to warn her that there was a very real possibility that he’d be disrupting her peace.

“Hate to break it to yeh, love, but he’s looking right at yeh with this dumb expression on his face.” He watched from the corner of his eyes, pouring another mug of draught, as Harry craned his neck trying to get a better look at the woman sitting at the bar. “Think he’s tryin’ t’ decide if it’s actually you.”

Anastasia, against her better judgement, peeked over her shoulder, looking right into Harry’s searching eyes. She whipped her head back forward, hunching her shoulders again. “Fuck,” she spit, quickly picking up her glass and downing the rest of the drink. “Shouldn’t’ve done that.”

“He’s comin’ over here,” Eric warned, keeping his eyes on the glass he was drying in his hand.

“Bloody perfect,” she huffed under her breath. She fixed her gaze on the bar top, hoping that if she kept her head down, Harry’d get the hint and walk away without talking to her. She’d cut him out of her life for a reason, and he had to realise that. He was daft sometimes, but he wasn’t a fucking imbecile.

Anastasia felt when Harry dropped into the empty barstool next to her, the energy that he carried around with him washing over her and making the hairs on her arms stand on end. She could smell him, too, the same scent that always lingered on his skin—the same body wash he’d been using for years, the same laundry softener that she knew Anne had been washing his clothes with since they were kids, and the Tom Ford cologne he’d taken to around his nineteenth birthday. She hated that she knew so much about someone who felt like a perfect stranger to her now, but she couldn’t help all the innate knowledge she held about him. They’d known each other since primary, for crying out loud. She was bound to know all these things about him. It didn’t help the ache in her chest at being so close to him, though.

“Sia,” he breathed out, his deep voice startling her. She hadn’t heard his voice since this time last year, when he’d whispered one last goodbye against her mouth before walking out the front door of her flat.

“Styles,” she acknowledged with a single nod of her head, not looking up at him. She couldn’t. She wasn’t ready for that. She used his last name in greeting to keep things impersonal. She’d called him H or Haz for most of their lives. He didn’t deserve the nickname. She was sort of upset that he’d even used her nickname, the one he’d given her long before Sia the musician had become known. The first time they’d met, he’d said that Anastasia was a mouthful, and when she’d expressed her disdain of the nickname Ana, he’d started calling her Sia. Now everyone called her Sia, even her parents.

“What are yeh doin’ here?” Harry asked, confusion clear in his voice.

Sia snorted at his question. She nodded her head in thanks when Eric placed a full pint in front of her, obviously sensing that she needed more alcohol. “I’m having a few drinks. What are you doing here?”

“Didn’t mean the bar,” he quickly amended. “I meant America. LA.”

“I live here,” she shrugged, taking a sip of her beer, swiping her tongue across her top lip where some of the head had stuck to her skin.

“Since when? Last time I saw your mum, she didn’t say anythin’ about it.”

Sia finally peeked a look at him from the corner of her eyes, watching as he dragged his hand through his hair. It was a habit he’d had for as long as she could remember, but it was strange seeing him do it when his hair was so short. For the last four years of their friendship, he’d been growing it out, and now it was the shortest she’d seen it since their early years of secondary.

“When’d yeh last see my mum?” she asked, curious since her mother hadn’t mentioned anything about Harry the last time they’d spoken just a few days ago.

“About a month ago. Was filming near home and stopped in for the weekend. She was round my parents’ house when I showed up.”

Sia was slightly affronted that her mother hadn’t mentioned anything, but then, she thought it was maybe for the best that she hadn’t. Even the mention of Harry’s name out of anyone’s mouths made her a little uneasy, and she was sure her mother knew that.

“Been living here since March,” she supplied. She took another sip of her beer. “Working with a producer that’s based here. Choice was easy.”

She saw Harry’s eyebrows shoot up, his eyes sparkling with an excitement. He knew how much that opportunity meant to her, to be able to work with a music producer, doing what she loved and what she’d gone to school for. Her mum hadn’t said anything to him about Sia getting a job in the industry, so this was amazing news for him.

“Yeah? That’s great! Who’s the producer?”

She rolled her eyes at his enthusiasm. As far as she was concerned, he didn’t get to be excited for her anymore. When she’d heard from Anne about him landing the role on the new Nolan film, she’d rolled her eyes in her head and sipped at her tea, offering his mum a hum that she hoped didn’t seem too rude. She loved Anne, but she knew her son had broken something inside of the girl, so she wasn’t too surprised by her lackluster reaction.

“Does it matter?” she asked.

Harry’s face dropped instantly, brows furrowing, lips frowning. “I mean…”

“Just stop,” she urged, pushing back her barely touched pint. She grabbed her purse from her lap and dug around for some bills to cover her tab. “This is weird. Stop acting like everythin’ is normal.” She stood and tossed the money on the bar top, sending a nod at Eric, who was at the other end of the bar, tending to someone else but keeping his eyes on Sia. He nodded back, acknowledging her thanks and goodbye.

“I’m so—”

“Don’t apologize, Styles,” she warned, slinging her purse over her shoulder. “Little too late for that, don’t yeh think?” Sia turned to walk away from him, hating the way her heart squeezed in her chest. She clenched her teeth against the tears that were threatening to collect in her eyes. She’d been in his presence for two minutes, and a year’s worth of built defenses and hardened exteriors was crumbling. She hated him for making her feel like this.

“Wait, Sia,” he called, hopping up from his seat to follow after her. “Lemme walk yeh home. It’s dark out.”

“Don’t fuckin’ bother. Been gettin’ by fine on my own. Yeh don’t need to pretend to care now, Harry.”

The door to the bar slammed behind her before Harry could even open his mouth to form a rebuttal.

[fizzyhosh]

Binding

Chapter Five

Prologue | One | Two | Three | Four | Five

Summary: Remus likes things predictable, orderly, and punctual. His comfort-zone is compromised when he meets (Y/N), a girl who is indifferent, spontaneous, and not outwardly friendly. Despite their obvious differences, he can’t seem to stay away from her, even when they aren’t working side-by-side at the most boring job on the planet.

Word Count: 1269

A/N: HONESTLY it’s been a minute since I’ve posted any fic, let alone a part of Binding. Please forgive me. I’m literally the WORST. I hope this is good enough for you to forgive me ! Also, only ONE MORE PART of this series!!! 

•••••

bind·ingˈbīndiNG

noun 

1. a strong covering holding the pages of a book together.

adjective 

1. (of an agreement or promise) involving an obligation that cannot be broken.

•••••

"You don't have work today," Sirius reminded, glancing over his bowl.

"I know..." Remus said slowly as he bent down and scanned the contents of the fridge.

"Then why are you leaving?"

He stood up slightly and peeked over the door at Sirius. "Am I only allowed to leave the house for work?"

"I mean," he paused to swallow his food before continuing, "you never left the house before you got the job."

"Fair point. It's nice outside today, though."

Sirius frowned. "Are you keeping a secret?" He perked up. "Are you going to see Y/N? Outside of work? Like a date?"

"No." Remus shut him down quickly. "Why do you seem so disappointed by that?"

"You like her and I want you two to hit it off."

"We're friends, Sirius. She has a boyfriend and I'm not a home wrecker. We are going somewhere but it's not a date, alright?

Sirius tried holding back his large grin. "Have fun, mate."

"What's so funny?"

"Nothing. I'm just excited for you to start living your best life. I also can't wait for her to realize you two are perfect for each other. Just all around excited."

"You're starting to sound likes James. Go back to the edgy Sirius we all know and love. I'll be back later this afternoon."

"Bye, loverboy."

Remus flipped him off and got on his bike, making his way to where he and Y/N agreed to meet up. He waited a while, wondering if he misread the time they were supposed to meet. He pulled out his phone, alternating between rereading "noon" in the text and looking at the time at the top of his screen. It was close to 12:45 and he was about to head home, only partly devastated that the love of his life didn't show up. That was a an understatement, he was definitely heartbroken.

As he got back on his bike, Y/N yelled across the small park. Remus looked up to see her disheveled and upset. He dropped his bike as she approached him and almost knocked him over as a constant stream of words flowed out of her mouth.

"I can't believe you waited, I'm so sorry I'm late, my alarm didn't go off because my phone died and since my phone died I couldn't text you and I was just hoping you were still here because I value our friendship and ohmygosh I can't believe you're actually still here."

Remus put his hands on Y/N's arms, smiling lightly. "First, breathe."

Y/N nodded and breathed deeply.

"Second, of course I waited. I value our friendship too. And considering how many times you've almost been late to work, I figured you'd be late to this as well." That was only a small lie. He did expect her to be a little late, but not 45 minutes. He also was just trying to calm down the sound of raging butterflies at the "I value our friendship" part by cracking a joke, which worked for a moment until she smiled and riled up the butterflies again. Remus dropped his hands, hoping the lack of contact might settle the noise in his head.

"You are really the nicest person I have ever met."

That felt like a friendzone sentence, which really helped the butterfly noise situation because they immediately stopped, an aching heart replacing the wild animals.

"You look like you need a coffee."

"Yes, I do," Y/N said, leading them to the coffee shop across the street. They talked for a while until their presence was considered loitering and had to find a new place to chat.

Remus liked how easy it was to get lost in a conversation with her. Unfortunately, he was so comfortable that he let words slip that he never intended Y/N to hear.  

"My anniversary is tomorrow and I still have no idea what to do," Y/N said with a sigh as they walked around the park, admiring the weather and nature.

Remus bit his lip, not a fan of this conversation. Y/N's boyfriend really seemed like a piece of trash. "Well tomorrow is doomed for me too. Lily's party." He stuffed his hands in his pockets and kicked the ground.

Y/N nodded. "We should just convince the world tomorrow is cancelled so neither of us have to do our stupid things."

"There must be something that makes you look forward to your anniversary?" Remus prompted as he looked at her sideways.

She sighed and paused for a long time before asking, "Do you think I should break up with him?"

He was taken aback. Here he had the chance to give great advice that would make her break up with her boyfriend, but instead, he let slip the dumbest thing he could have.

"Well, to be honest, I might not have started checking out so many books in the first place if I knew you had a boyfriend, so yeah." His eyes widened as she frowned.

"What?" she asked with a small, confused laugh.

"Uh.."

"Wait... did you only go to the bookstore because I worked there?"

"Y/N, it's not as weird as it sounds."

"Really, Remus? Because it sounds like you stalked me until I offered you a job."

He shook his head vigorously. "No, it's not like that."

"Then what exactly did you do?"

"Look," he took a deep breath and ran a hand through his hair. "Just let me say what I need to say and then you can fire me and block my number and do whatever else you want. I'm going to be 100 percent honest right now."

Y/N crossed her arms, looking insecure now that she discovered Remus didn't just come into the bookstore because he read super fast. One of the only people she felt she could trust these days didn't seem to be who he said he was.

"I've never been very outgoing or friendly or fluent with words. The first time I saw you, I was completely speechless at how beautiful you were. I couldn't think of the right words to say to you so I just left. The thing is, Y/N, I've never had trouble forgetting about random people or getting thoughts out of my mind but you drove me crazy from the moment I saw you. I couldn't even watch The Princess Bride because I could only think about all the things I could have and should have said to you in the bookstore. So I went back the next day, ready to say all these amazing things but you had your hair up and you looked so perfect that all my confidence just erased completely from existence. I know it sounds crazy but I kept checking out books so I had an excuse to go back and talk to you, but I just could never find the right words to say to you. After I found out you had a boyfriend, I swear I never intended to ruin that or anything. I meant what I said earlier. I do value our friendship. A lot."

He waited and scanned Y/N's face for any hint of any emotion. He'd even be fine with her being royally pissed if he could just tell what she was thinking.

"I have to go," she mumbled simply, emotionless. "Thanks for being honest with me."

Remus stood as he watched her walk to her car, running her hands through her hair. He felt a few tears fall as she drove off, wondering in what world would things have been different?

He got on his bike and rode home, trying to make it back before he started spiraling. Remus' spiral of emotions was something best experienced in the safety of a house with his best mates there to look after him.

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[airsafariblog-blog]

Gold Rush Legacy & A Small Airplane, Summer 2017, Part I

It was not love at first sight. She was standing on the short cut grass in front of a one-story building and you could tell that she had been wandering the wild of the Canadian North for a very long time. I did not find much enthusiasm in her look at me either. And yet, toward the end of our two week romance, I called her Princess with all the passion of my heart. 

She was a Cessna 172, born in 1975. The paint was peeling off at places I did not even know existed on an airplane. But, as many bush pilots would be quick to point out-paint is only an added weight that keeps you from pushing more useful stuff, like fuel, food or game, to the inside (or sometimes on the outside of, for that matter) of an airplane.  What was lacking on the exterior was surely not made up for in the interior of the plane. To say her cabin was “ragged” would do a gross injustice to the term. Yet, what is vital for flying machine in the Canadian wilderness? The way it flies. And fly she did! Her aerial performance was impeccable. The propeller was squeaky clean, not even the tiniest chip, her climbing was fervent, mightily sucking on the air and, as I was later to find out, she was exceptionally humble when it came to drinking gasoline and oil. Princess was simply a marvel to fly and care for. 

Before I was given a chance to explore her fine features, I had to get past Eric, her proud owner and devour guardian (hence the name of Eric’s flying outfit - Guardian Angel). I arrived exhausted in Prince George, where Eric’s office was located, after some thirty hours of travel, shortly before midnight. The trip from Europe reminded me a lot of the famous opening scene of the Dead Man motion picture by Jim Jarmusch. 

Johnny Depp is heading West while observing in amazement how the nature of his fellow travelers transforms the further West he gets.

The flight from Munich to Toronto was filled with travelers carrying their flawless four-wheeled carry-ons, bags full of ethereal souvenirs, stunning fragrances and fashionable spirits, chatting delightfully on the board of a jazzy jet Boeing 777-300ER. People on the board of the less flashy Airbus A321 from Toronto to Vancouver seemed to be more down to Earth. The last leg from Vancouver to Prince George was to be flown over the jagged Pacific Coast Mountains by an eager turboprop Bombardier Q400. Climbing onboard I was bewildered by the composure and dignity that beamed through the coarseness of my new journey fellows. 

Our approach to Prince George began with a gentle dive into the clouds just as the sun began to sink beyond the horizon - an amazing sight. Before that, I had a nice chat with a girl sitting next to me. It was all about bears, wildlife, First Nation, the sparse yet sufficient pub landscape in Prince George, rising homelessness and drug abuse and we were both taken aback by the beauty of the sunset. 

Alas, my mind was not really there. It was deeply immersed in the thoughts about the undertaking that I had been dreaming about for the past three years and that seemed even more impossible now when it was about to begin. My original fancy was to rent a small airplane and to fly through Alaska. After quite some time it proved to be a no go. No one in Alaska was willing to let their precious machines being flown over some of the least hospitable and unforgiving places in the world, especially by some flat-landed European with zero mountain flying experience. It was nothing short of a miracle when we found our Guardian Angel, Eric’s flight school, operating out of Vanderhoof and Prince George (British Columbia) who actually considered lending us a Cessna, albeit “only” for flying in the Canadian, not the Alaskan, great wild.

In the months leading up to July 2017, I read all possible bush-flying and mountain-flying material I could find. I spent hours, days really, watching training videos and searching for the right articles. All these efforts helped me realize that mountain flying might be extremely rewarding, but you better stay away from it unless you have a lot of experience under your belt, which I did not. 

Let us hear an expert here. Fletcher Anderson wrote one of the most comprehensive books on the subject (Flying the Mountains, McGraw-Hill Education): “Even on the very best of days, it involves considerably more than just normal flying over exceptionally scenic terrain. The aircraft’s engine develops only a fraction of its rated horsepower at high altitude...because the air is thinner, the wing needs greater true airspeed to develop adequate lift. The pilot may also suffer from lack of available oxygen at altitudes lower than required to clear the mountains. Steep and high terrain is hard to fly over. Weather conditions, which exceeded the operating capabilities of most small aircrafts are frequent, normal occurrences, and weather can change dramatically in minutes. In addition to mountains, Alaska has the obvious extremes of vast distances and poor weather from the nearby oceans and no roads (therefore, a small airplane is 40 per cent more likely to crash in the mountains than anywhere else). According to the National Transportation Safety Board, the aviation death rate in mountain states is twice that of the nation as a whole”. 

What a chipper fellow.

Upon landing in Prince George, the cabin was filled with the smell of smoke from the distance wildfires across British Columbia - an eerie feeling. The city itself is a legacy of the sparse web of centuries-old trading posts of the North-West Company throughout the big northern void. Originally inhabited by First National people, proudly calling themselves “people of the confluence of two rivers” (Fraser and Nechako rivers, to be exact), Prince George of today is more of a confluence of roads connecting South British Columbia with North, Yukon and Alaska. Lonely Planet’s account of the city is not overwhelming flattering: “The downtown, no beauty-contest winner, is compact and has some good restaurants”. You also might want to know that there is a large paper mill that generates a very particular smell, which gives Prince George away for miles and miles. The smell is a neat aviation navigation beacon, as I was to learn the following year when flying through the dense wildfire smoke. I fell in love with the city instantly nevertheless. 

Eric greeted me at the small and tasteful terminal building of Prince George airport. I thought I might simply go to bed as it was close to midnight and I just flew halfway around the world. Well, I was wrong. Eric was in full swing and after being done with my car rental we headed to his office at the airport to do the proper paperwork before mountain flying training and rental checkout procedures could start the next morning. 

After I finally arrived at the Downtown Motel it was almost two in the morning. The motel did not try to conceal the fact that it is an affordable place to stay at. There was still quite a number of people hanging and wandering around the neighborhood with no apparent purpose, direction or place to stay. This was yet another signature feature of Prince George. In the next morning the next day, I got myself a large cup of cheap coffee at a gas station and was ready to get back to the airport. 

At Eric’s office, we started a very thorough ground training just as two helicopters lifted off from a helipad nearby. “It’s all over the radio. There is a small plane missing, that is what they are after”, uttered Eric laconically. Those books on mountain flying were not lying, apparently. You can get into trouble around here. 

No wonder my learning attention - which is usually not the strongest of my skills, whatever they may be - was laser-focused on every single word Eric shared with me. 

How to cross the mountain range safely, how to turn in a tight canyon, how to do an emergency landed where there is no emergency landing spot available, how to read wind direction from the aspen trees and lakes, how the eagle never dodges in the air for it is you who needs to make the move, how to avoid prop strike on soft and gravel airstrips or how the weather changes in ways you can never predict. 

In the afternoon, we took to the skies with one of Eric’s instructors. The first checkout flight was a rather serene affair - slow flights, steep turns, stalls, the usual stuff. 

Later that same day I was assigned another instructor - Alex, a cheerful character and a splendid pilot. We started working on my navigation skills and emergency landing procedures. I truly was not at my peak, owing this slightly to the jetlag and to the fact that I was flying in a completely foreign environment, but I muddled through. Over Fraser Lake, we had a conversation about the First Nation people in Canada, specifically around Prince George, which was when I first gave a deeper thought to their touching fate. Not that I had much time for these contemplations because Alex made me start training spins. 

 A spin is essentially a stall that results in a downward autorotation of the airplane usually when a pilot does not heed attention to the aircraft speed or bank angle (or, usually, both). 

To be able to recover from a spin is a crucial skill, even though one usually occurs during the initial or final phase of the flight when the airplane is slow and low and there is only limited, if any, space and time for a successful recovery. 

With Alex, we were flying high above the lake and our Cessna just refused to spin, so good an aerodynamic little airplane it is. Or, let me put it more correctly - I was unable to spine her. Thus, Alex took the helm and pitched her high, banked a hard right and kicked in enough of the left rudder and with an excited exclamation “spin, bitch, spin”, she reluctantly did what was asked of her. After that, I was also able to make her spin and recover, and with the jetlag still hanging around, I started to feel a bit dizzy. 

Yet, the training was far from over. Here comes the “graveyard spiral” part. Its name does not imply anything friendly - and it is not. A graveyard spiral is a dive that happens usually in bad visibility or at night when the pilot becomes disoriented and cannot see the horizon. Sadly, plenty of graveyard spirals are concluded with the airplane hitting the ground at a very high-speed with a very fatal outcome. What happens is that without the outside horizontal reference the pilot does not realize the airplane is banking and descending at the same time and pulls on the yoke in order to arrest the descent which only tightens the turn and, subsequently, the descent. We do not have to go into the details here, suffice to stay that the lesson is - always trust your instruments, not your gut feeling about your attitude and - more importantly - don’t ever get into a position that you have to deal with meteorological or visibility conditions that are beyond your abilities, training or rating. A year later, not too far from the very same spot we had trained to recover from the “graveyard spiral” I was to learn both of these points the hard way in the middle of choking and deliberating wildfire smoke. But we will get to that much, much later. 

What to look for in Part II?

Eric makes me turn in a tight canyon without looking outside the airplane. How to land on a logging trail in the wild. My crew arrives - how to stuff three adults and tons of equipment into a small airplane and still expect it to fly? First night in the North - Dease Lake, sea-plane trip at Atlin Lake. The madness of the Gold Rush. 

[layla256]

Key to Her Heart Chapter 1/52: Halloween

So, some context first. My friends and I decided to do a 52 fanfic challenge this year, one prompt each week. The only rule is that you must adhere to the prompt, one post a week, and they all must be in the same universe. So, for example, if you have been writing marvel fanfic all year, but you think a prompt would be GREAT for Supernatural, you have to somehow fit the Supernatural universe into the MCU. 

Now, because I hate myself, I decided I was going to write an entire series consecutively with only a basic outline of my AU and no knowledge about the future prompts.

KILL ME.

But, either way, I think this’ll be a fun adventure into writing for me. So behold the first in my Spuffy AU Key to Her Heart. I’ll probably post this on AO3 and EF as well.

The prompt this time was:  Our hero (or heroine) loses his memory.   Who will help him find his way back?

And doesn’t that just scream “Halloween episode”?

WARNING: At one point at the end of this chapter, Spike makes the assumption that Buffy was raped in the episode Reptile Boy. While no detail is given and Buffy reveals that there wasn’t any rape, it’s still an issue mentioned and I don’t want to blind side anyone with it.

Spike wasn’t a traditionalist. He never pretended to be one either. No matter how much Dru had wanted him to be, that just wasn’t something he cared about. All that chanting and ritual? It just wasn’t him. However, if there was one rule he was willing to take seriously, it was the one about Halloween. You don’t start shit on Halloween. It’s everyone’s fucking vacation day. Sure, if a tasty snack wanders by he isn’t going to say, “No thanks, I’m dieting today!” But he also understood that, at a certain point, causing problems on Halloween was just being a dick.

Spike can respect an asshole (he is often one), but being a dick is an entirely different story.

So, you can imagine the conflict he felt when Dru told him that someone was, as his mother would have said, “making shenanigans” that were going to deliver the Slayer into his lap. On the one hand, he had his principles dammit! He had said he would respect the Halloween rule when he first learned of it. However, on the other hand, he was an ancient, evil vampire and he did whatever he wanted! Not to mention the fact that the slayer was a royal bitch who had it coming.

Eventually, Spike made a compromise with himself. He’d go out and enjoy whatever chaos occurred because of this newcomer. If he saw the slayer? Great. Dinner and his Dark Princess back at her best again. If he saw the person responsible? A beating and lecture that would make his father weep with jealousy.

He hadn’t been planning on what he would do if he ran into her however.

She looked beautiful, although he knew from experience at this point that she always did. Her normally well-kept hair was completely falling out of whatever adorable braid she’d managed to coax it into that night. The crown of what looked like Daffodils was almost falling completely off her head. Her make up was relatively un-smudged, but that probably had more to do with the fact that she wasn’t wearing much, just a light dusting of gold across her eyelids and a similar color on her lips.

However, the thing that caught his attention wasn’t just the confused look on her face, but the dress she was wearing. Unlike the tight black number that had been haunting his dreams since that God-awful frat party the week before, this dress matched Buffy far better. The creamy silk of the one-shoulder dress looked gorgeous folded and wrapped around her body, accentuating every curve while hiding the important parts from his gaze. The golden rope around her waist synched it all in, drawing his attention to her hips and that luscious ass that—

And he was going to stop that train of thought right now.

She looked at him with no recognition and a hint of fear, making him want to cast himself on the nearest cross. Worried that she was upset with him for the party, he shrunk his shoulders, held his hands up, and tried to seem as non-threatening as possible.

“Pet I—I would never hurt you. You know that, right? Please tell me you know I would never hurt you.”

While the confusion didn’t leave her hazel green eyes, the fear definitely did. “D-Do you know me?” She asked hesitantly, looking around them with wide eyes. “Do you know who I am?”

Spike’s brow furrowed. “Of course I do, luv. You’re—”

He was cut off as one of her friends came running towards them looking a bit odd while followed by the other one, who wasn’t moving normally. Too stiff.

“Buffy!” Red called, waving her arms wildly at the girl in front of him. “Buffy, thank goodness you’re ok!”

 Spike was stuck on baby-sitting duty, and he wasn’t sure how upset he wanted to be about it. Red, who was a very hot ghost for some reason, had run off to find Buffy’s pseudo Watcher, leaving him to look after the Whelp and Buffy, both of whom had turned into their costumes, leaving confused shells behind.

“So I dressed as a goddess and now I am one?” Buffy asked again, still trying to grasp everything after the short run-through Willow had given Spike. “That does sound rather . . . disconcerting.”

What’s disconcerting is you using that kind of language Spike thought, but he kept it to himself. He knew there was a bright mind under all that blonde, and he wasn’t going to be one of the many people discouraging her about it.

“So, fill us in,” Whelp ordered, showing more initiative that Spike had ever seen in the teen. “What is the situation like?”

Spike sighed heavily, not wanting to really get into it. “Look, I wasn’t here for the mess that was last year, alright? So you lot are getting the cliff-notes version and nothing more. Got it?”

The goddess and soldier before him nodded, though Whelp looked like he wanted to argue the point more.

“Now, I don’t know about you Whelp, but I know that little miss amnesia over there moved here about a year and a half ago after her parents split. She met you and Red and you little Happy Meals have been friends ever since.” He noticed Buffy scrunch her nose at the term “Happy Meals” and couldn’t help but smile knowing there was still some of her in that costume after all. She always did get on his case about it.

“Why would my parents split apart? Surely if they loved one another enough to marry—”

“Cliff notes version luv,” Spike reminded her gently. In all honesty, he didn’t have the heart to tell her the truth. That when Hank and Joyce Summers had been confronted with the very real issue of the supernatural Joyce had dealt with it through mild panic, heavy drinking for two days, and silence while Hank had simply attempted to ship Buffy off to the funny farm. Thankfully, the idea of her daughter being sent somewhere like that for something Joyce knew was real had snapped her back to herself pretty quickly. However, Buffy had blamed herself for the divorce ever since, and Spike, evil though he may be, didn’t have it in him to hurt her like that.

“So you lot wound up getting involved in most of the nasty business here on the Hellmouth since good ol’ Watcher thought you might be a Potential.”

Once again, Buffy’s brow furrowed in the most adorable way. “Potential what?”

Spike shook his head. “Potential Slayer, luv, like that Faith bi-bint Willow mentioned she was getting. One girl in every soddin‘ generation to cause vamps like me all kinds of headaches. They thought you were one for a bit, but turns out you’ve just got major magic going on.”

Whelp shot up. “‘Vamps like me’? You’re a vampire? Then why are you helping us?” Spike saw him reach for his weapon, but waved him off.

“Easy there Rambo. My issue’s with the Slayer and her lot. I got no quarrel with you all.” He looked at Buffy with a single smirk. “Told you that the first night we met actually. You and Red threatened to light my highly flammable ass on fire if I tried to take a bite out of you. Been nothing but banter ever since.”

Buffy smiled, “So we’re compatriots then?” she asked cautiously. “Through humor and fear?”

Spike barked out a laugh. “‘Compatriots’, sure. I gave you my word that, long as you and your lot stayed out of my business, you’d be safe as houses. Yer Mum’s got permanent protection too, in case you’re worried.” No need to mention how pointless he thought it was, seeing as how the woman bashed him over the head with an ax right after thinking he was attacking Buffy.

Buffy nodded her head gratefully, more of her hair spilling out of her braid. “Thank you very much Spike. That puts my mind at an ease.”

Bloody hell, Red needed to hurry up with whatever plan it was she had for fixing this mess.

After that, things eventually quieted down a bit. Soldier Whelp went into the kitchen hunting for “provisions”, leaving Spike with a curious Buffy.

“Spike,” she said cautiously, tilting her head as she looked at him. “Spike, why were you concerned that I was afraid of you when we met? If we are friends and you have upheld your end of our bargain, then surely I would have no reason to fear you.”

Spike sighed heavily for what felt like the thousandth time that night, running his fingers over his gelled hair in frustration. He’d honestly been hoping she wouldn’t ask about that.

He could lie to her, tell her some made-up story to keep in the goddess’s good graces for a while longer, but he immediately shook the thought off. He might not mind it, but Buffy would be offended. She’d see it as a manipulation. While she won’t come out and reprimand him for it, he’ll still be subject to those disappointed eyes. Like last time.

“You, well, pet, that is—” he cut himself off with an angry growl. Rip the bandage off. “You’re upset with me. I went and killed some blighters who absolutely deserved it, but you didn’t appreciate it. Haven’t spoken to me in a week for it.”

Buffy’s head tilted once again for a moment, considering. He hated when she did that. For one thing, she looked bloody adorable. For another, he could never tell what she was about to say. “What was their crime?” She asked finally.

Spike blinked at her twice. “What?”

“Their crime.” She repeated simply. “You ascertained that they deserved their fate, but what crime did they commit to deserve such a thing?”

Spike couldn’t tell her. He couldn’t explain the pain on Buffy’s face when she’d told him of the drugs they’d put in her drink, they way they’d dragged her about as they saw fit.

She hadn’t come out and said it, but he knew that you only drugged a girl for one reason and one alone. That in and of itself would have earned them a solid beating session with him (he’d never much liked rape, even after being turned), but the fact that they’d done it to Buffy, kind, innocent Buffy who went so far out of her way for her friends and family, even an undead monster like himself, was unforgivable. There was only one appropriate punishment, and he certainly didn’t regret being the one to give it out.

Thankfully, he was saved from explaining as the crown completely fell off of her head, and Buffy, blinking as if to clear a fog, looked at him with recognition for the first time. “Spike?” she asked her nose once again being too freaking cute for words as it scrunched. “Ugh, what happened? I feel all magic-y.”

“Thank Eric Cantona, she lives to butcher the mother tongue once more!” Spike grinned and swept her into a hug, swinging her around once before dropping her onto the ground.

“Spike, what’s got you all ramped up? You’ve been all with the brooding worse than Angel lately.” Despite her words, a bright smile took over her face. “Ever since Willow, Cordy, and I almost got sacrificed to that snake demon thingy last week—”

Spike gripped her shoulders tightly, eyes tinted yellow. “Wait, what? What sacrifice?”

Buffy rolled her eyes. “Remember? The frat party? I was all with the crying and the depresso girl and you went on a completely unnecessary warpath through the whole freaking frat?”

Spike felt the distinct need to lay down. A sacrifice. The boys hadn’t raped her. Just a failed sacrifice. That he hadn’t even known about.

Yes. A kip was definitely a requirement right now.

So that’s the first chapter! In this AU Buffy is the key as opposed to Dawn, and Faith is the Slayer. This is actually a thought I had back in high school when I first watched the series and couldn’t get my hands on anything past the first third of the fifth season and none of the Angel series, so recognize that a lot of my characterization won’t stray from my feelings about characters past around the Dracula episode. While I’ll be referencing and maybe even writing about things in later seasons (maybe even the comics, I’m not sure yet), my main influence are going to be those first few years. For example, I am perfectly aware of the fact that Faith gets a redemption and becomes a great Slayer and a good friend to Buffy. However, I had seven years to sit and stew on how much I hated her before I could get my hands on the later seasons, so . . . yeah.

[thearrangment-phff]

LVII. Switzerland

January 2018

“Could you lift up your shirt Your Imperial Highness?”

Isabella looked around the room. There had been no less than 5 doctors, many from the Royal Medical Household, along with her and Harry. Isabella had 4 more months until she gave birth, making her about 5 months pregnant at this time.

Isabella lifted up her shift and watched as the doctor talked to her and asked if she was comfortable. She had given Isabella a small warning about the coldness before moving around to find the babies. There was medical talk among all the doctors in the room. Harry had just been watching awkwardly not knowing what to do.

There were so many people in the tiny room that Isabella was getting uncomfortable very quickly. Rather than voice her thoughts she immediately grabbed onto Harry’s arm. Her grip on his arm left visible markings because of Harry’s pale skin. He got closer to her and used his other hand to brush Isabella’s hair back.

“Here we have baby number one and... there is baby number two.”

“We can know the genders, now right? I’m 5 months already,” asked Isabella.

“Yes, we can. So here is baby number one and it looks to be a boy. Baby two on the side right here is... also a boy. We can find out if they are identical right now if you want.”

“We would,” answered Harry.

“They do not share of placenta... which in simpler terms means they are not identical,” explained one doctor.

“This means we have to change how we approach this pregnancy differently,” added another.

“What are you talking about?” asked Harry.

“Her Imperial Highness had fainted before. She is physically weak and suffers from anemia and macrosomia and this is a high-risk pregnancy after all. Medications will have to be different to accommodate the pregnancy, the fact that Her Imperial Highness is having twins, and her depression all need to be accounted for,” explained one doctor.

“I cannot and will not do bed rest. That is out of the question. Harry and I have a tour next month, I have important engagements, and dozens of family events to attend to. For god’s sake, my brother is getting married this year and I cannot, not show up,” argued Isabella.

“You would be risking your health and the health of your children.”

“I don’t have the same privileges as Kate,” continued arguing Isabella.

“Why are you bringing Kate into this Isabella?” asked Harry.

“Because she is treated better than me in the press. She is not the wife of spare, she doesn’t have to worry.”

“Ma’am, you have serious medical issues. The press shouldn’t matter when it comes to something like this.”

“But it does and none of you understand that. My image is all I have,” stated Isabella.

“That’s enough for right now. My wife is upset so could we have the room for a couple of minutes,” interrupted Harry.

Once it was the two of them alone Isabella spoke up, “I won’t listen.”

“We are talking about the health of our children and you. Do I have to call your mother and grandmother saying you're endangering the welfare of our children? Or should I get my father and grandmother involved?” asked Harry in anger.

“No one needs to know anything,” replied Isabella.

“I am begging you Isabella don’t do this.”

“Can you please not talk to me about this?”

“For god’s sake Isabella do I need to declare you insane so you won’t kill our children?!” asked Harry.

“You do what you have to do and so will I Harry.”

“We can legally declare her insane but the public backlash would ruin the monarchy.”

“They say everything will ruin the monarchy but nothing ever does,” stated Charles.

“Sir, if we do this what makes you believe that Isabella’s family won’t contest this?”  

“They won’t have no know,” answered Harry.

“We won’t do that. Isabella’s mother is a friend and if we tell her the situation perhaps she would agree with us. It would help if we could speak to Isabella’s ladies,” said Charles.

“They would take her side,” replied Harry.

The door had opened revealing Isabella and her 4 ladies in waiting.

“Good. You all are here. Isabella would like to say something,” smiled Princess Charlotte.

“I am very sorry for my behavior. There is no excuse and I will be glad to take some time off but I would like to be surrounded family if I am to be locked up until the baby’s come. Staying in Geneva, Switzerland with my mother and sister Gabriella is my suggestion. I can also take trains to Belgium, Luxembourg, and France for weddings and christenings,” explained Isabella.

“Harry?” asked Charles.

“Fine by me.”

“Well, then it’s settled. You’ll be on the next train to Geneva,” smiled Charles.

“Why did you change your mind?” asked Harry.

“It was brought to my attention how selfish I was being. I shouldn’t have fought with you like that. It was in everyone’s best interest that I take leave until the babies are born,” answered Isabella.

Her Imperial and Royal Highness Archduchess Isabella, The Duchess of Sussex has been suffering from anemia and macrosomia and has been hospitalized several times over the course of 3 months. The Duchess of Sussex will forgo all engagements, including the Royal Tour and will be staying in Switzerland with family. The Duke of Sussex will stay in Switzerland for some time before returning to London and continuing the tour alone.

February 2018

“I remember being pregnant with you like it wasn’t too long ago. You were such a tiny little thing,” smiled Marie Astrid.

“I feel like a cow. I’ve gained almost 30 pounds and I’m only 6 months along. I still have 3 more months and everyone is telling me that babies gain all their weight in the last month and a half!” complained Isabella.

“How are you and my grandsons?” asked Marie Astrid.

Isabella rubbed her stomach, “We are fine. Doctors say they are fine besides them growing faster than normal.”

“Have you finished the names yet?”  

“Charles Baudouin Jean Philip and Albert Christian Leopold Felix. Although, I don’t think those are the set names. I might add a name or two, maybe even take away one or two. Nothing is certain at this point,” answered Isabella.

“Well, those are amazing names. They are very Belgian if I may say.”

“Belgium will always have a special place in my hearts. Papa was born in Belgium; both my grandmothers are Belgian, and through you, my great-grandparents were the King and Queen of the Belgians.”

“You always were at peace when we would go to Belœil,” smiled Marie Astrid.

“Well, it was the one place where I go and just forget about the world. Mamie’s brother Antoine always made sure we all had fun whenever we would go visit. The whole family would just go for a couple of days and nothing else mattered. It was peaceful,” smiled Isabella.

“Do you feel like you don’t have that anymore?”  

“I feel like I am a fish in a bowl. To be put on display and to be picked apart by people I will never know,” answered Isabella.

“You married into the British Royal Family, love. The most publicized family of them all.”

“Sometimes I think to myself, why did I agree to this,” laughed Isabella.

“Belle don’t say that now. Your married and with two little boys on the way.”

“I could still leave. You remember my part of the deal right mama?”

“You could divorce him at any time you see fit,” answered Marie Astrid.

“I could start now. The divorce papers, that is. I think it would take about a year, making me about 26 by the time we divorce. I could marry Joachim. More titles with no work what’s so ever like I do in London. Less press and more freedom. It’s sounding more tempting as the days go by.”

“Oh, my sweet girl.”

Marie Astrid pulled Isabella into a hug. Isabella’s head laid on her mother’s chest as Marie Astrid stroked her hair. Though there were no obvious signs Isabella had let out a couple of tears.

“Do you know what they say about me? Do you hear what they say as if they know me? How could anyone survive this and come out the other end a sane person?” asked Isabella.

“You will get through this.”

“It’s no wonder they all started marrying commoners. No one in their right mind with a family history as long as theirs would marry them. I should’ve stuck with Catholics and save myself from this torture.”

“You will feel differently once you hold those boys in your arms. Marie Christine and Gabriella both turned into different people once they had kids. It changes you for the better and I have no doubt in my mind the same will happen to you.”

“What if I change for the worse? What if it’s downhill from here?” asked Isabella.

“You are a good person Belle. You always have been and once the world can see that, then they will know who you really are,” explained Marie Astrid.

“I do that. I did that. Then I was chewed up because I dared to give money to those in need. As if those little nothings don’t understand that money makes this world go round. They can donate their time but it means nothing without money. Am I the only one who sees that?”

“No darling, you’re not, but the people who comment on everything aren’t worth your time,” assured Marie Astrid.

“It would be easier to ignore if they weren’t the ones keeping me in London in a Palace with a British title.”

“Seeing you like this breaks my heart. If I could go back to that day in London I would’ve made your father and I go back to Geneva and never look back,” whispered Marie Astrid.

“It’s hard sometimes. I care too much about everything and it’s driving me insane. It plays in my head over and over again but nothing seems to fix it. Every smile, every gesture, every word just replays in my head all the time. I remember things from years ago like conversations that I wish I could change. Do something different, say a different word, and I feel like my head will implode one day. I want to fix them but I know I can’t go back in time.”

“Do you want to go back on medication? Have you’ve been on them?”

“I’m on different medications since I’m pregnant. They haven’t been working so the doctors put me on something different last week but it hasn’t been helping. I feel as helpless more than ever right now,” explained Isabella.

“Have you told the doctors about this?”

“Yes, and then they’ll just change my medications again.”

“Gabriella should be up in a couple of minutes from her nap with Victoria. Why don’t we go make something for dinner? Your father will be home from work in an hour and we couldn’t make your favorite?”

“10 cheese macaroni?” asked Isabella.

“Of course. Just a little something to cheer you up a bit, yes?”

“I’ve been craving so much cheese since I got pregnant. Thank you, mama,” smiled Isabella.

“You are my beautiful daughter. Seeing you like this makes my heart hurt. I would do anything in the world to fix it.”

“She is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen,” smiled Isabella.

“Even when she crying my bloody ears off she’s still beautiful,” laughed Gabriella.

“She’s gotten bigger. The thought of her being a toddler baffles me, let alone a teenager girl or a grown woman” laughed Isabella.

“Henri insists that she’s too small for her age but I think he’s out of his damn mind. He isn’t the one feeding her through his breasts. Believe me, you won’t like breastfeeding.”

“How is Henri?”

“He had to go back to Copenhagen this past weekend. It broke his heart to leave Vicky and I but he had to. I was thinking of going to visit him next month. Would you like to come?” asked Gabriella.

“I can’t go on in an airplane and I’m supposed to be on bed rest as much as possible,” replied Isabella.

“Of course, sorry.”

“It’s not a big deal. I’d just rather stick to Luxembourg, Belgium, and Switzerland if I can.”

“Okay, have you heard from Alexander lately?” asked Gabriella.

“I think he mentioned his wedding is going to be in Belgium? Was I correct on that?” asked Isabella.

“Yes! He and Luisa picked the Cathedral of St. Michael and St. Gudula in Brussels for the religious ceremony.”

“Why does that sound familiar.”

“It’s the cathedral were our great-grandparents King Leopold and Queen Astrid married. Mamie suggested it because Luisa and Alexander both descend from them,” answered Gabriella.

“Have they chosen a date yet?”

“No date but they are thinking summer.”

“Great. Either it will close to my due date or after I don’t think I’ll be willing to attend,” said Isabella.

“What happens if you have your boys on foreign soil? Victoria was a couple of days late but having babies a couple of days early is always a possibility too. What happens then?” asked Gabriella.

“I have no idea. I don’t think they’ve had someone in the direct line of succession born on foreign soil since the Hanover days,” replied Isabella.

“Pretty hard to have a British prince born on foreign soil, don’t you think?”

“I honestly don’t know what would happen. If it was going to happen to anyone it would be me. I’m the working royals who is constantly out of the country for familial reasons.”

“Everyone is having babies, it’s going to be such fun! Just like when we were growing up, right?”

Isabella nodded at her little sister as she rocked her baby girl in her arms.