#though I’m ever so slowly starting to change my mind just a tiny little bit as of super recently for the first time in my life

[yakultii]

it's better to be hot than cold 🤔

AGREE !!

this is evident by my electricity bill this month

[hswriting]

Hard to Love - Part 2

[Image Alt ID: a three picture collage with a black background. The first picture is of someone wearing a chain bracelet grabbing the wrist of someone who is wearing a thumb ring. The second picture is of a neck wearing a necklace that had a moon and a gemstone on it. The neck is bruised. The final picture is of Harry Styles putting his hand over his mouth. He is wearing rings of three of his fingers. He is also wearing a black shirt. End Alt ID]

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Masterlist Series Part 1 Part 3

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2.2k words

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Harry wants to talk to April about what he saw, but April is hesitant given their past. Harry can’t let it go so easy.

CW: mentions of abuse, alcohol, suicidal ideation.

It’s been a week since my double shift with Harry, and he has not said a word to me that wasn’t work related. We have worked a few shifts together, but he never said anything that wasn’t necessary. It’s so odd for him not to make fun of me, but it’s kind of nice. I’m sure it won’t last very long though. He will talk to me soon enough.

I pull up to the restaurant and put my car in park. I take a deep breath to prepare myself for the day. I walk in the restaurant doors and see Harry is already here, which is odd because I’m always here first. He gives me a look. I can’t really describe it except for curious. I don’t know what his deal is today and I don’t have the energy to deal with it. I walk up to the station and grab an apron. I get ready. Straws. Pens. Notepad. Check. Check. Check.

“Can we talk?” Harry said quietly. I turn and look at him.

“What do you want? Been a while since you’ve made fun of me. After what you saw I’m sure you have jokes piled up for me.”

“I don’t actually. Don’t be a dick. I’m serious.” He says, his face almost scary with how stone cold it looks.

“What do you want to talk about then?” I ask him.

“Your arms.” He says just a bit too loudly. I shush him.

“Not so loud, asshole.” I say, pulling at my sleeves, feeling the comfort of knowing they are down.

“I’m sorry. I wanted to ask you what happened.”

“Nothing you need to worry about. You just worry about you.”

“Why are you being like that?”

“Being like what Harry? You don’t get to be a dick to me every single day, and then ask me such personal questions.”

“Yeah, but when you look like that, I almost have to. Do you hurt yourself? Did you get into an accident? That’s a lot of bruises for one tiny person.”

“Why do you care? You hate me, and I hate you. That’s how it’s always been. I’m not entertaining this conversation. Go find something to do before we get in trouble.”

“No. I won’t. They look awful. You should see a doctor.”

“Mind your own business, Harry. I mean it.” I say. I start to walk away when Harry grabs my wrist to get my attention again. I immediately turn around. Fear floods my body. My wrist aches.

“April I-“ he begins to say, but stops. It’s dawns on him that he is hurting me and he immediately lets go. “I’m sorry I didnt mean to hurt your-“

“Don’t you ever fucking touch me again.” I say, so serious that he looks a little scared. “I mean it. Don’t ever fucking touch me. Ever.” I run to the bathroom and close myself into a stall. I run through everything in my mind that could calm me down. I hate Harry. He needs to stay away from me. He has no right to ask me about them, and then grab me. He’s so stupid. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him.

I love coming to work because I can get away from being at home. I don’t have to worry about being grabbed. I don’t have to worry about being hurt. I’m safe at my job. Today Harry changed that. He made me feel scared. He made me uncomfortable. It makes me hate him more. He took away my one place that I could go.

I realize that I started to cry as I sat in the bathroom stall. My fists squeezed shut. My body tensed up. I work through the motions. I slowly loosen my muscles to a more comfortable state. I open my hands and see little crescents From my fingernails. I open my eyes and wipe my tears with my sleeves. I open the stall and look at myself in the mirror.

You can tell I have been crying, but there’s nothing I can do to get rid of the puffy red eyes. I have to go out like this.

I walk out of the bathroom stall and back to the station. Harry stands there and is sanitizing menus and drying them. He doesn’t look up at me. He goes back into the silence, giving me the cold shoulder.

The shift passes by so fast, but that only leads to a long day ahead of me. I know Robbie is going to be home.

We do our normal mid shift cleaning routine. I clean the bathroom. Harry takes care of rolling silverware and getting dinner menus ready. When we walk out Harry says goodbye to the staff who just came in. He begins talking as we walk to our cars in the employee parking spots.

“Listen April, I’m really sorry I put my hands on you. I didn’t realize I was hurting you, and it dawned on me as to why you have marks there-“

“Harry-“

“No, let me talk. If someone is abusing you April you don’t have to go home. I can help you.”

“Help me? I don’t know how many times I have to remind you, you HATE me Harry. Before you saw them, you made fun of me so bad. You made the only safe place I had miserable, and today you took it away from me completely. I don’t have anyone else to lean on. I only have myself.”

“I know what I said was awful. I had no idea April. Now I do. Let me help you. It’s not right you have to live like that.”

“What can you do that I haven’t tried? I can’t run away. He has my location on my phone. I tried ditching that too Harry and he has a tracker in my car that I can’t find. I try to bank money Harry and he finds it. Spends it on more alcohol, then beats me more for trying to leave him. What do you want me to do? I can’t just leave. If I am not home by a certain time I’m going to get my ass handed to me. I have to go.” I tell him, trying my best not to raise my voice so others can hear.

“April you can’t go home. They have places for women like you. Or god forbid, you could stay with me. You can’t go back to that!”

“I don’t have a choice! You have no idea what my life is like Harry. You caught me off guard the other day. You don’t care about me. You just feel guilty because you made fun of me for being abused. I want to leave. Your offer sounds so tempting, but I can’t.” I tell him. I climb into my car and start it. I respect him for his offer, but I hate him because I can’t take it. I hate him that i have to go home. That’s not his fault. It’s mine.

I pull into the driveway. I quickly gather my things and head inside. I sit my stuff down and get into regular day clothes.

“Took you an extra 5 minutes to get home compared to your normal drive time. What happened?” Robbie asks.

“Got held over at work. My manager was there today and we had a short team meeting.” I lie. My manager was there, but there was no meeting.

“Okay.” He says flatly. “Start dinner. I’m starving.”

“Okay.” I say, not putting up a fight. This is my safest way to live. Robbie follows me into the kitchen. He grabs a beer and goes back to the living room. I start making a meatloaf for us to eat. I feel my phone buzz in my pocket. I don’t check it. I know if he walks in and sees me texting whoever it is, he will get mad at me for not promptly making him something to eat.

The meatloaf is in the oven when he comes back out for another drink. Another beer. He gives me a look and walks back out.

I make mashed potatoes as I wait for the meatloaf.

After what feels like forever, I take the meatloaf out and make Robbie a plate. I take it into him and then I make my own. When I sit on the couch beside him, he takes his first bite. He finishes his mashed potatoes and think to myself thank god. I hope the rest of the night goes this well.

He begins to bite into the meatloaf.

“The bottom of this is burnt.” He says with irritation and anger in his voice.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to-“

“Don’t you fucking work in a restaurant? Shouldn’t you know how not to burn food?” He asks me? Raising his voice.

“Robbie I don’t make food at the restaurant. I just wait tables.” I tell him in defense, hoping me not being a cook will get me some slack.

“Quit with your attitude. That’s all I get from you anymore. No more ‘thank you Robbie for what you do for us. You provide for us. You work so hard Robbie.’ It’s always attitude and talking back and I’m fucking sick of it.” He says, slamming his plate down on the coffee table.

“Robbie I’m sorry. I can make you something else.”

“What, so you can burn it too?” He says, standing up.

“No Robbie, please.” I beg him. He grabs my shoulders and makes me get off of the couch and stand. Tears roll from my eyes.

“You hate me that much you can’t even put care into the food you make me?”

“Robbie please. You don’t have to do this.” I try to reason with him. “I know I messed up I’m sorry.”

“How else are you going to learn to treat me with respect unless I show you how. You’re like an insolent child. Have to beat your ass for you to learn anything.” I beg him not to do what he is about to do. He doesn’t even hear me.

He slaps me across the face, red marks and burning sensations left behind on my face as I fall to the floor. He picks me back up and grabs my neck. He slams me against the wall and I struggle to breathe. I claw at his hands. I kick his shins but he doesn’t move. I try scratching at his face but nothing makes him let go. It feels like a lifetime before air is able to fill my lungs. It burns like hell and I cough a lot after his hand leaves my throat, but there’s nothing sweeter than the air that I am breathing now.

I try to run towards the front door as he is searching for his next weapon but he runs to me and grabs a handful of my hair. I scream, but it’s useless. He takes me over to the couch. He sits down and slams my body onto his legs.

“You want to behave like an irresponsible child and back talk me, I’m going to beat you like a child.” He says. He yanks my pants down. He takes his belt that he grabbed earlier and takes it across my bottom as hard as he can. I scream again. Another whip. And again. The next one is across my back. Another on my feet. Then more across my bottom. Everything stings and burns so bad. My throat is raw from shouting.

When he feels like I’ve had enough, he lets go of my hair. He pushes me to the floor. He walks back into the bedroom and slams the door. I lay on the carpet and cry. I’m so sore I can’t move. My whole body aches and burns. My neck and throat are just as bad. I do my best to adjust my clothes so my pants are back where they belong.

I need out. I need to leave. But I can’t. I want to call the police, but he will hear me. He would kill me before they ever got here. I have no one I can call. I can’t go anywhere. I am stuck here.

When the burning dies down some, I crawl to get on the couch. I lay on my side, avoiding the raw and welted areas. I remember my phone. I pull it out of my pocket and open the screen. I look at my notification bar.

New text message. Open to read.

I open the messaging app and see Harry’s name pop up under unread messages.

Harry: I just wanted to check in from earlier. My offer still stands, whenever you’re ready.

I want to believe Harry. I want to believe that he is genuinely being nice to me, and trying to help. I want to take his offer. He could come and get me. He could call the cops, but if Robbie would ever find him, he would be dead too. I can’t do that to him. To anyone.

Me: I’m fine Harry.

Harry: is there anything I can do?

Me: for your safety and for mine, just let it go.

Harry: okay. I’m sorry. Try to have a good night.

I don’t respond. There is no having a good night. There’s not a good anything anymore. Everything sucks. There’s no getting out of this life. I just want it to end. I want this pain to end. That’s the only way.

I end up falling asleep on the couch after many hours of staring at the clock on the wall. Listening to it tick as time passes.

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Masterlist Series Part 1 Part 3

[imagines-ahs]

Chapter Forty-Seven: Scarlet.

Summary: Wilhemina Venable felt it was finally time to leave Kineros Robotics and get a job with people who weren’t such morons like Jeff and Mutt. What she didn’t expect, however, was for her new boss to be so damn insufferable. She didn’t expect to fall in love with her, either.

Tag List: @mayfair-fleur @mistysswampmud @paulsonsratched @msvenablx @notmeellaannyy @rwoolfe @golddustdykes​ @lovingsarah @slut-for-sarah @geinobinarie​ (message me to be added if interested!)

A/N: I'd like to thank everyone who's still interested in this very much close to my heart story and everyone who's been rooting for me and for everything going on in my life. Things have not been easy, and I've been thinking and wishing that I could just sit down and write, but I just... couldn't. I'm back now though, hopefully for good. Thank you, once again. I don't plan on letting that story go any time soon x.

Change of subjects. Venable supposed Billie Dean would open up more when she felt ready. Doing her best to shift her internal dynamics, she nodded and leaned to peck her lips once. How would my grandmother be like? She would never find out… she would never know if her family would have loved Billie Dean, if her mother would have been happy for her, if her father would have grown protective. I’m alone. She knew that, but being reminded of it was a different story. “We can order.” Clearing her throat in order to clear her mind, Wilhemina reached for her phone inside her pocket. Billie Dean snuggled closer and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, caressing it. I’m glad she has a family.

“Do you mind if we eat something other than McDonald’s?” Billie asked softly, hesitantly.

“Not at all. I was going to ask you that same question, actually.” A chuckle left Venable’s lips. She opened the delivery app and slowly began to scroll down the many options there.

Billie Dean smiled and leaned closer, eyes on the screen. “What about some pasta?” Venable hummed. Pasta sounded good. “There’s this restaurant I always order from.” Gently, Billie reached to touch on the screen; her nail produced a tiny sound as it made contact with the glass. “They have the most delicious red sauce.”

“You know I won’t argue with you over food recommendations,” Wilhemina teased, trying to lift the somber atmosphere off of herself. It worked, for Billie Dean laughed in a way that got her mind thinking about nothing but the way that woman beside her managed to be so damn majestic.

“I hope I won’t let you down this time.” Honey eyes moved to brown ones.

Wilhemina offered her a tiny smile. “You couldn’t.” It was true, and it was also scary. Not now.

Humming lovingly, Billie looked down at the screen again. “I usually go for their spaghetti with meatballs. They also have those delicious breadsticks that taste heavenly with the sauce.”

“That’s perfect.”

“Would you like me to order?”

Venable nodded. She handed her phone to Billie Dean and leaned on her shoulder to watch the screen. Billie Dean bit her inner cheek, holding back her grin as she began to tap down on the mobile. “Do they have anything sweet?” How funny was it that ever since starting to work at Billie Dean Howard & Co. Wilhemina found herself craving sweets in a way she had never done before? Sweets had never been much of a part in her life.

“A few pies.” Swiftly, Billie clicked on the options. She slowly scrolled down. “Their pecan one is delicious.”

Venable was about to agree to it when she saw there was cheesecake on the menu. “Have you ever tried their cheesecake?”

“Not really. We can though, if you’d like.”

Wilhemina nodded. “It’s my favorite.”

“Really?” Honey eyes moved to brown ones once again. Venable smiled a little. She did offer me some cheesecake last week. “I’ll keep that in mind.”A soft blush coated Wilhemina’s cheeks. Billie Dean took notice of it to herself and looked back at the screen. “They have strawberry, grape and blueberry. Which one would you like?”

“I personally prefer grape, but anything else is fine.”

“Grape it is, then.” Billie quickly placed their order, holding back the urge to complain about the fact that Wilhemina was paying for everything. The subject didn’t even cross Venable’s mind, if she were being honest, for the simple fact that Billie Dean had quickly gotten them grape cheesecake was enough to melt her heart in a strange way; she didn’t even question it, she simply got them what Wilhemina had said she liked more. Such a small act, but so damn sweet in nature… Venable wondered if Billie even realized how much she managed to enchant people. Handing the phone back to Wilhemina, Billie Dean leaned back against the couch, arm still wrapped around Venable’s shoulders. “It should be here in about forty-five minutes.”

Wilhemina hummed as she set her phone aside. With both of her hands free, she reached for Billie’s free one and tangled their fingers, slowly playing with them as she looked down at their hands. Will she ever be bothered by the fact I have no family? Like it or not, Venable would never be able to introduce Billie Dean to a mother or a father. I’ve never stopped to think about it before. Her relationship with Lisa had been so different she wondered if it could even compare.

Lost in thought, Venable didn’t realize the way honey eyes were so concentrated on her, analyzing every single feature of her beautiful face. Billie still wondered how could she have not realized just how utterly gorgeous Wilhemina was from the very first time they saw one another. The memories came crashing inside her brain, and Billie Dean couldn’t help but let out a faint chuckle at how different things were, now. Past Billie Dean would have never guessed.

The sound that left Billie’s lips pulled Venable away from her mind. She blinked once and looked at Billie Dean. “What is it?” She asked softly, small smile on her lips.

Shaking her head, Billie smiled a little more. “I was just thinking back to when we first met… to how different everything was.”

“Oh.” What a change of thoughts. Venable nodded. “Indeed.”

“I was so… intrigued by you.”

“Intrigued?” A questioning fiery eyebrow raised up.

Billie nodded. She licked her lips as she thought about how to best articulate her words. “You were so… different. You are different.” The frown in Wilhemina’s features seemed to grow. Billie Dean’s lower lip got caught between her pearl teeth for a moment. “The way you’re so true to yourself… not bending your head down to anyone. It’s different.”

Venable had never stopped to really think of herself that way. “I suppose.”

Billie nodded. Her fingers caressed Wilhemina’s, as well as her other hand on her shoulder. “I mean it mostly about how you’ve always treated me. I was just someone else to you.”

Wilhemina couldn’t help but let out a small irony filled chuckle. “You’re anything but just someone else to me,” she said before she could process the words.

Billie Dean’s smile now reached her eyes. Her chest fluttered just enough for her to want to kiss that woman again. “I mean back then… you’ve never kissed my ass.” Well now that’s just weird. Billie held back the stupid childish giggle that desperately fought for freedom inside herself.

I’d like to kiss her ass now. Wilhemina gulped. Come on. “I know what you mean… and I’m glad for what it means to you.”

Billie nodded. “I desperately wanted to get to know you.”

“Was I that mysterious?”

“Oh yeah,” Billie Dean teasingly raised her eyebrows. “Everyone wanted to get to know you.” Venable let out a scoff. “It’s true!” Billie protested. “I know Emma did.” Brown eyes stared deeply into honey ones. Billie Dean raised a hand in protest, although her cheeks began to blush. Was it a good idea to make that joke? Both knew it hadn’t really been a joke.

“Ugh,” Venable groaned. The reminder that Emma existed—and in consequence, all of their current situation—was definitely not something Wilhemina wanted right now. But also… was that a hint of jealousy in Billie’s voice? Overwhelmed, Venable hid her face against Billie Dean’s neck, which caused a loud laugh to leave Billie’s lips and a hand to tangle in fiery hair. “Don’t even remind me of her,” she murmured.

“I’m sorry, it just slipped out.” To hear Wilhemina saying she didn’t even want to be reminded of Emma was, in all honesty, an amazing feeling. Am I…? She was. Billie Dean knew that.

Wilhemina groaned again before looking back up. She licked her lips as she thought. Thinking of Emma has always been anxiety inducing. It was rage inducing now, too. “I still can’t believe she’s said the things she did to you… who does she think she is?”

“Someone who’s in love with you,” Billie Dean said quietly.

“She’s not—she’s not in love with me,” Venable quickly said. Honey eyes kept on looking at her. Wilhemina frowned. Is she? No, it didn’t make sense. She shook her head. “It’s not—it was not like it is with you.”

Billie held back the ginormous grin that wanted to grace her features once again for the sake of the subject they were talking about. It’s not like it is with you. It was a sort of relief to hear that. “She does like you, that’s for sure.”

The worry dimple between her eyebrows kept on intensifying itself. Venable sucked on her lower lip. “Well, yes, but… in love? I don’t think so.”

“Why?”

Wilhemina shrugged. That’s a stupid question. “For starters, it’s me, and then—then how could she be?”

Exactly. It’s you. “Just like I am.”

Venable shook her head again, deciding that it definitely didn’t make any sense. Things between her and Emma had never been as intimate, as comfortable and as personal as things with Billie Dean. How could Emma be in love with her? No, it just didn’t make sense. She wasn’t in love with Emma, after all. “I just… no.”

Dwelling on the subject would cause more harm than good. The dimple between Wilhemina’s brows kept on growing and growing, and so Billie lightly squeezed her hand. “I just meant that maybe she was scared of losing you.”

“She’s never had me,” Venable said, quite coldly. But it was true. Giving herself to someone—anyone—was a huge step for her; one she doubted she could even manage to take in her lifetime. Billie Dean has a part of me. No, she did not, not yet. Billie hadn’t seen her body bare, after all. And still… I do feel like she’s got at least a fraction of me. She sucked on her lower lip again.

Billie kept her eyes on Wilhemina, paying attention to her every movement, even the slightest ones. She’s bothered. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, Wilhie. I’m sor—“

“No,” Venable cut her. Billie Dean closed her mouth. Wilhemina squeezed her hand lovingly, offering her a small smile. “You didn’t… I just—I had never… never stopped to think about it. About that, about how she saw me…” Grimacing, she shook her head again. “It doesn’t matter, she still didn’t have the right to treat you like that.” Logic had always been Venable’s best friend.

Billie had definitely understood that love was a hard subject for Venable. She nodded, caressing Wilhemina’s hand back in order to bring her some comfort. “I agree… but it’s over, now.” Is it? Billie Dean’s stomach dropped at the reminder that Emma knew—or rather, thought she knew—about Terry. She’ll destroy me to Venable. Billie had to think about how she’d approach that subject, but not now, not today. They had had so much turmoil over the past weeks, at least a weekend of peace was more than deserved. “Don’t think about her. She’s not here.”

“But she will be on Monday,” Wilhemina murmured. She leaned her head against the backrest, eyes glued on Billie Dean’s perfect ones. Their faces were close again.

“Then we’ll deal with that on Monday. I’ll be there with you.” Disguising her own worries was a hard task, but Billie knew she had to do it for Venable. Wilhemina seemed to hesitate, but nodded. With a small smile, Billie Dean leaned closer and kissed her lips softly, lingering there. As she was about to pull away, a hand reached to caress her cheek, holding her in place. Billie’s own palm now pulled Venable closer by the shoulder, caressing it. The kiss slowly grew firmer, and inside Wilhemina’s mind, the word ‘we’ passed through nonstop; they were a ‘we’ now. How good did it sound? But also… how would that ‘we’ be on Monday, when they were at a public setting, at a work setting, at a life setting?

“Billie,” Venable whispered softly, thus breaking their kiss. Billie Dean pulled away just enough to stare at dark brown eyes; she found a hint of fear there. Wilhemina nibbled on her lower lip, fingers nervously caressing Billie’s cheek. “On Monday… are we still gonna be we?”

Blonde eyebrows threatened to draw closer together. Billie Dean took a second to understand Venable’s question, but when she did, her own face softened up. She nodded, certain and firmly. “Of course, Wilhie.” She licked her lips as she thought, and then, hesitantly, began to speak again. “It… it took me so long to finally have you. I’m not letting go.”

I’m not letting go. The corners of Wilhemina’s eyes clinked. She nodded, and then she leaned to kiss that woman again because how did she manage to get so fucking lucky? I don’t deserve her. But she was there and she was kissing her and she was holding her so damn lovingly she feared she would melt away in Billie’s arms. I love her. I love her. I love her. She kissed Billie Dean a bit firmer in order to stop herself from having the possibility of letting it slip, and Billie’s arm around her shoulders pulled her even closer, causing her back to lift off of the couch and Billie Dean’s arm to slip lower; instantly, Venable leaned back, but with the hand tangled in Billie’s, she pulled her along. Billie Dean snuggled closer, arm letting go of Wilhemina’s shoulders for the sake of the position they were on. The kisses kept on growing firmer, and Billie Dean’s body now bent weirdly. So she shifted on the couch in order to rearrange her hips, which caused Venable to realize what was going on. Gently, she pulled away once again, eyes on honey ones. “You’re not comfortable, are you?” she whispered with a chuckle.

Chuckling back, Billie Dean shook her head. “No, but it is worth it to keep kissing you.”

Letting out a shy laugh, Wilhemina bit her lower lip. “Straddle me again?”

Billie’s stomach twisted. She nodded and moved to do so, legs on each side of Venable’s body. They had done that same thing that morning, in bed, and later in the vanity, but it was still new. Very new. She smiled down at Wilhemina, feeling as hands caressed her hips. Their breaths mingled. “Much better,” she breathed out.

Venable nodded slowly. “Much better,” she repeated. Brown eyes fell down to those rosy lips in front of her, but before she could move forward they already collided against her own. Wilhemina sighed, hands taking in every single curve of Billie Dean’s waist and hips, feeling the way the rough material of her jeans clung to her skin. Stupid jeans. Venable didn’t know what had gotten into her. And then she remembered that time Emma had straddled her in the couch of her house, and how different it had felt to make out with her; with Billie, time simply stopped. Against Wilhemina’s shoulders, near her head, Billie Dean rested her forearms and caressed her cheeks with her thumbs, cupping the fat there as if she were holding the most precious piece of art in the universe. Their tongues had long ago met, dancing like velvet against one another. Just to tease, Billie nibbled on Venable’s lower lip and pulled on it softly, a small smirk on her lips. “Oh—“ Wilhemina instantly gasped. Her cheeks turned such a dark shade of red it was nearly purple. Honey eyes turned darker as they stared at her, and Billie Dean caught her own lower lip between those same teeth, now. Venable gulped. Her lower stomach trembled, as well as her hands that kept on exploring Billie’s back.

“Do you like it?” Billie Dean asked in a near whisper, voice dropping in a way Venable hadn’t heard before. Wilhemina nodded again. I want to devour her, the thought passed through Billie’s mind as fast as lightening. She was the one to gulp now.

“I—I l-like it when y-you straddle me, too.” Venable’s voice trembled from something she couldn’t quite point to; something nice, very.

“Me too.” Billie Dean’s smirk grew a bit more. Her eyes fell down to Wilhemina’s lips before coming back up at dark ones. Venable instinctively pulled her closer. “Can I ask you something?” In the state she was at, Wilhemina doubted she had the power to ever deny Billie Dean anything; she nodded. Billie’s cheeks were the ones to tint now, but only faintly. “Do you like those jeans?”

Fuck. Billie Dean had caught her staring. Of course she had. Now, she turned purple. What an irony. Her eyes fell down as she struggled to keep them on Billie’s, but when she heard that same woman letting out a small chuckle, she looked back up again, lips curving up. What a funny contrast from just a few weeks ago; she would be feeling absolutely ashamed had that happened back then. But it wouldn’t have, for they weren’t that intimate, for they weren’t them yet. Shyly, Venable nodded. “It’s n-not nice to stare… I k-know. My apologies.”

My apologies. Why was Wilhemina so damn classy, even when teasing her? And why did Billie Dean find it so damn sexy? “It is if what you’re staring at is already yours…”

Already yours. Venable blinked once. Is she mine? Did she actually have Billie? What were they? Are we… girlfriends? They were both adults, for fuck’s sake. Did adults even call each other’s partners girlfriends or boyfriends? Wilhemina found it to be so childish… but the concept left her chest tight with joy. She licked her lips, eyes still on honey ones as she tried to find something to say. Nothing came to mind. Billie Dean was about to cut the silence when there was a knock at the door, thus cutting their spell. Both looked away, and Billie carefully got up. “I’ll go—I’ll go get it.” Venable cleared her throat and reached for her cane to get up.

Billie Dean nodded, watching as Wilhemina made her way to the door. Taking a deep breath, she only now realized how fast her heart was beating. Oof. Billie’s lower stomach still burned. She took another deep breath, hand smothering her blonde curls down in order to make herself more presentable. When Venable walked back in, they both followed to the dinner table. “Smells delicious,” she said softly, reaching to help Wilhemina take the containers off of the bag.

Just like Billie Dean, Venable’s whole body seemed to have been engulfed in flames. She forced her mind to go back into place. At the words, she nodded. “Indeed it does.” She reached for the now empty bag. “I’ll go grab the plates and silverware.”

“Let me help you.” Billie followed to the kitchen along with Wilhemina, cheesecake in hand. As they got there, Venable put the bag away and reached for the plates. “Give it to me.” Billie Dean extended her arms once she let the cheesecake go. Slowly but surely, her nerves began to calm down.

“Thank you,” Venable said softly. She now reached for the silverware and for their glasses. “What would you like to drink? I have juice, water, tea…”

“Juice is perfect.”

Wilhemina nodded and moved to grab it, as well as put the dessert into the fridge. They both got back to the living room and set everything down. Sitting face to face, Billie Dean was the one to start opening one of the containers. Venable followed along, heart still a bit faster than usual. Steam raised from the pasta. Billie hummed as she moved to open the container with the breadsticks.

“Looks delicious,” Wilhemina leaned closer. “That’s definitely a hidden talent of yours.”

“Choosing good food?” Billie Dean chuckled as she grabbed a breadstick and took a bite. Venable nodded, carefully serving the both of them. “Well, I’ll take it.”

“You should,” Wilhemina smiled. She pushed a plate closer to Billie before grabbing a fork.

“Thank you.” Taking another bite of the breadstick, Billie Dean reached for a fork and quickly swirled some pasta on it. She took a bite, eyes closing as the taste invaded her mouth. Of course it was as delicious as she remembered it to be, and maybe Venable really was onto something.

Wilhemina couldn’t help but hum as well, reaching for a napkin just to make sure her chin would be free of sauce. “This is wonderful.” Carefully, she reached for a breadstick and dipped it into her dish. Honey eyes watched her lovingly. Venable took a bite.

“Approved?”

“More than so.”

Billie Dean’s smile grew as she got back to eating.

It was interesting, how even a simple task as much as eating felt much more meaningful with Billie around. It caused Wilhemina to wonder what the future held for her, and even though anxiety tried to break it here and there and make things blue, Venable focused only in coral for now; only for a meal, she could manage.

The pasta and breadsticks were soon over, and as Billie Dean followed Wilhemina to the kitchen once again and they loaded the dishwasher together, Billie tried remembering when was the last time she had enjoyed doing chores so much. When was the last time she felt excited to do the dishes, to watch a movie, to just sit on a couch and talk… when was the last time life had showed its colors to her? When was the last time life had allowed itself to be purple?

They both got back to the table, cheesecake in hand. Venable carefully cut them each a piece, mouth salivating at the sight of the creamy cheese and the thick jelly.

“Now that I know it is your favorite, I’m nervous for your reaction,” Billie commented softly.

Shaking her head, Wilhemina let a smile escape her lips. “I’m sure I’ll love it just as much as the pasta.”

“Hopefully.” Billie Dean took a first bite; it was not the best cheesecake she had ever had, but it was good enough for herself. I need to find a way of getting her a piece of that gourmet cheesecake I had in Germany. Honey eyes still watched Venable’s every move.

To Wilhemina, the cheesecake was absolutely delicious, even though it couldn’t be considered the best she had ever had, either. Slowly, she savored each note of sweet and sour, crunch and smooth. She nodded. “It’s good.”

“Not the best, though.” Billie took another bite.

“Maybe not the best, but something I’d buy again.”

“I’ve failed, then,” Billie Dean frowned teasingly, which caused laughter to fill the dining room.

“Don’t be dramatic,” Venable said softly once her laugh died down.

Biting her lower lip, Billie kept her smile printed on her lips. “What’s the best cheesecake you’ve ever had?”

With the dimple between her eyebrows, Wilhemina thought. She felt a foot caressing her own underneath the table. Emma’s. She assumed Billie Dean wouldn’t like that answer. “I can’t really choose.”

“But if you had to?”

Don’t make me answer to that. Lying was not something Venable was fond of… but Emma had been a grey cloud over them, and she desperately needed that cloud to go away. “The homemade cheesecake from one of the ladies at the orphanage… it was the first one I’ve ever had, and none other has ever compared.” It was true in more than one way.

Each bit and detail Wilhemina revealed about her past just caused Billie to admire that woman even more. Her chest flushed with something awfully similar to love. “I bet it was delicious.”

Taking another bite, Venable nodded. When had her past become something so trivial to talk about? “I think it’s more of an affection memory than the taste itself… I do remember it being extremely creamy though, even if the ingredients were probably low quality.” They didn’t have money to spend on extras, after all.

“Affection memories are the best kind,” Billie’s words came as soft as melted butter. “How old were you?”

I’m not sure I have many of those. “Six.”

[bellygunnr]

Tomorrow and Our Other Futures

My half of an Art Trade with the wonderful @twilighthomunculusart / @twilighthomunculus

This was a total blast to write!! Thank you!!

-----

Humidity makes the air stuffy and warm, thick to breathe, but Kai sucks it in anyway, grimacing as sweat collects against his skin, perspiring happily around folded joints and scrunched fabric. He has to swap his phone ear to ear to dry his palms, half in the mind to put Kyoichi on speaker phone just to avoid the hassle, but something stops him. Maybe it’s how public his apartment is, or how well sound carries from balcony to balcony. He doesn’t want anyone having the entire conversation, but maybe he should duck back inside anyway. It’s getting late.

“You know, me and Seiji were considering heading up to Fuji Speedway,” Kyoichi says, voice crackling slightly over the phone. “That’s near you, right?”

“Close enough,” Kai says slowly. “I haven’t-- I’ve been focusing on more local things. Haven’t hit there yet, so…”

Shuffling on the other end of the line. Something dark flits across Kai’s vision. He tracks it to the railing, where light floating up from below illuminates the shell of a beetle. Bits of wing stick out from its carapace.

“So what? You should come with us. We’ll crash at your place for the weekend, since the drive’s so long. Sound good?”

“Woah, hey. I’m cool with coming-- you know that. You sure you want to crash here, though?”

His apartment’s tiny. Barely more than a studio setup, with most fixtures a combined room except the closet and bathroom. Not to mention all the stuff he still hasn’t unpacked. Really, he’s been living out of his MR-S more than his room.

Kyoichi mumbles something unintelligible. The faint click of a lighter twinges Kai’s inner ear, followed by the snap of a zippo. Kai can see it perfectly in his mind’s eye, and, fuck.

It’s only been a couple weeks since he’s moved out. No one was particularly friendly in Tochigi, but Kanagawa is a new type of hell, trying to meet people. He’s lonely. He’d had a routine-- and now?

“Can’t be any worse than my place, Kai,” Kyoichi says.

The beetle flares its carapace, stretching out its wings. Kanagawa even has different bugs. The summer works differently. The pavement on the touge is an unfamiliar formula. Kyoichi, at least, is the same, voice tight with a perpetual edge of being irritated.

“Got that right,” Kai snorts. “Alright, okay. When should I expect you guys, huh?”

“Dunno. Guess you’ll have to call Seiji for that. It’s late here-- good night, Kai.”

The cell goes dead. Kai stares at the screen with bemusement, Kyoichi’s words echoing in his head. He’d gotten breathless and rushed, there, at the end, probably because he started having an emotion. Maybe one of them should have started an argument instead.

But he can’t deny that he feels a little better.

—

The Evo III slides up next to his MR-S like it was always meant to park there and Kai just stares at its glossy black paint, throat choked, until the doors pop open and the remnants of Team Emperor come spilling out. Kyoichi runs his hands through his hair, headwear tucked into the collar of his shirt, betraying the impact the day had on him. Opposite of him, Seiji stretches, groaning loudly as he chases off the aches of riding in a stiff sports car. 

“Well! That was fun,” Seiji says. “Oh, shit, Kyoichi, pop the trunk, will you? I just remembered–”

Kai tilts his head, watching silently. Kyoichi waves a dismissive hand and tosses his keys at Seiji, who catches them without looking halfway to the rear of the car. The parking lot lights frame them perfectly, throwing them into that stark relief so reminiscent of Iroha’s slopes. Maybe something’s wrong with him, or maybe that’s all he’s ever known, and dealing with change is– hard.

“You guys better not have gotten me anything,” Kai calls. “I didn’t get you anything!”

“Obviously,” Kyoichi says.. “And if you had, I’d hit you. Go on, we’ll catch up.”

Kyoichi has the nerve to wave Kai on. Sputtering, but compliant, Kai turns on his heel and hurries up to the upper level. At least this way, he’d have time to pick up a little…

Not that he hadn’t already! Kai had spent the better part of a week making sure his stupid flat looked presentable. Some boxes got unpacked, he scrounged up some extra bedding, and he even had food in the fridge. Drinks, too. It’d have to do.

He has enough time to shove a few things into unseen corners before there’s knocking on his door. He hurries to open it with a flourish, only to gape at the gift brandished in Kyoichi’s hand.

“You guys didn’t have to get me anything,” Kai laughs. “Is that–?”

“Sake,” Seiji sings. “And movies. And an extra futon.”

Kyoichi’s footsteps are loud and heavy as he crosses the threshold. Kai wonders if he looks this huge everywhere, or just here. Seiji takes up room, too, but he slips in far more delicately from behind and immediately sets to untying his boots, overnight bag pinned under an arm.

“The movies were Seiji’s idea,” Kyoichi says with a grunt. So we’re watching them because he’ll be sad if we don’t goes unsaid.

Kai accepts the proffered gift of sake, the shiny wrapping crinkling against his arms. He’d have to get cups, and maybe popcorn, even as he reels at the sudden turn of events. Really – this was a lot. This was downright sappy for Kyoichi, no matter how dour he looks. It’s saccharine. 

—

They never flipped on the lights. In the dark, they’d shoved everything over and made the bedding, spearheaded by Seiji’s giddiness, leaving Kai feeling– pleased but unbalanced. The sake helped settle him a little, but not even it could soften the sharp sensation of Kyoichi’s arm around his shoulders. When he steals a glance at him, all he sees is a barely-suppressed smile and a pink flush across his face.

The movie is a quiet one. Foreign, either French or American, Kai can’t tell, but it’s good. Seiji leans his full weight onto Kai throughout it, humming.

“Do… either of you… know what’s going on?” Kai manages to squeak out.

“Car race,” Seiji says, with a grim inflection. “It’s good.”

Well. Yeah. Kai snorts a laugh. He’s not wrong.

“Where did you even get this from, Seiji? What happened to Perfect Blue?”

“Oh, yeah, Perfect Blue. Great buddy film,” Kai says, giggling. He grips his sake closer to his chest. “I saw it in theatres awhile ago.”

“You were a baby awhile ago,” Kyoichi responds, flicking his shoulder. “Seriously, Seij–”

Seiji flaps a placating but dismissive hand, then throws his arm around both Kyoichi and Kai, dragging them closer. The pile of pillows and blankets they’ve wrested onto the floor with them shifts haphazardly. Music and noise blare from the television as one of the quintessential car races goes belly-up.

Kai stares as the scene is repeated from every angle. He thinks about SW20s, autumn, and dangerous hairpins. He thinks about the blind corner in the track he hit last week. It’s all part of the game, here. He needs to rotate his tires. 

A strong hand tugs his drink out from his grip. 

“Hey!” Kai says, grabbing for it.

“No,” Kyoichi grunts, and downs it. “Stop looking so maudlin. You’re giving me depression.”

“If it helps, I got the movie from Fumihiro,” Seiji says conversationally. “And you already have–”

Kai squints at the screen, theft momentarily forgotten. Who the hell was Fumihiro? Kyoichi seems to know, as he has to duck underneath his fist, striking out at Seiji with a clumsy swipe. Laughter overrides whatever the TV is doing, and Kai breaks down into giggles between them, burying his face in the blankets. 

—

Kai wakes up slowly in the morning. His neck hurts. He’s too warm. There’s something sharp jutting into his lower back. When he tries to move his arms, he finds he can only retrieve one, and opens up sticky eyes to investigate.

His apartment is a disaster, is what he registers first. Not unusual, but strange because didn’t he just clean it? And then, oh, right, Seiji and Kyoichi are here– and wow, okay.

He’s half lain out on top of Kyoichi, who folded himself into a pretzel, and Seiji is the one who has his arm trapped by reaching across the gulf to grip his team leader’s hand. Sunlight flickers in through the curtains, casting a slice of light over the three of them. Kai debates waking them up, or moving, or anything, really.

But that’d be a waste. It can’t be that late in the day. Besides, Kai can’t let them know he saw them holding hands. That’s– that’s gotta be saved. 

And he does feel better. More settled. Huh.

With that last thought, Kai tries to turn over, curling into the mess of bedding and Seiji’s side. He’s asleep within seconds.

[toa-kohutti]

A Gift the Great Spirit Left Unnamed

Chapter 1: Arrival

A nomadic Toa of Lightning takes a stop at a small village on the coast of the Southern Continent in order to recover from her wounds. She quickly realizes that she got more than she bargained for when she meets the village's healer...

A love story from a world where there is no word for "love".

I breathed a heavy sigh of relief when I saw the village over the horizon. Being a nomadic Toa, my home and tribe long broken and scattered, getting respite was more important than ever. As I stepped up the hill, my lungs struggled through shaky, haphazard breaths, trying to avoid touching the shattered Rahi talons that embedded themselves in my flesh after the beast tore through my armor. I couldn’t remember the exact name of what struck me, but it had a venom on its cruel, shedding talons, and the throbbing pain of that poison in my muscles was impossible to ignore, slowly spreading to more of my war-torn body. The pain was worth it, though, always worth it, no matter when it happened. Saving three Matoran researchers, pinned in that cave by the Rahi, was worth it.  

The pain had put me on autopilot, and I was quietly subsumed by the dull state of mind that always comes along with pain. I had hardly noticed that I had arrived, but when stimuli overwhelmed the doldrums, I heard a rash of small sounds, followed by a curious stir. The sun was a few moments away from setting, and it seemed that I had interrupted their preparations for night. The soundscape was full of quiet whispers, which I didn’t have anywhere close to the concentration to focus on and interpret. Matoran turned from their paths or put their things aside, some sticking their heads out of their leaf-and-wood homes, all focused on me. Except for one. 

A Matoran in armor in a few shades of natural blues and painted highlights of orange, rushed up to me, panting a little as she did so. While I could see that other Matoran had painted armor in the village, hers was elaborate, and in patterns that were rare to see, with swirls and lines covering her as if she were a decoration herself. Her mask was no exception, with broad, flat bands running across the mask’s surface, with beautiful orange painted patterns upon them, like waves in sunset. She straightened herself before moving into a stiff, clearly unpracticed stance of respect, gently bending her knees and back, with her head pointed straight at the ground.  

“W-we welcome you, Toa of Lightning!” she said, a small nervous stammer in her voice. I was surprised she recognized my rarer element from my colors, something unusual for Matoran on more isolated settlements like this one. “On what occasion have you come to our humble Koro?” She looked up to me with a clear sense of anxiety mixed with a desire for approval, neither hidden by her unfamiliar, but beautiful mask. 

“I’m… just passing through.” I chose my words carefully, my pain giving me little mind for the rituals of respect that Matoran show for their guardian Toa, as much as I recognized and appreciated them. “And I need a place to rest.” My voice was marred by the shake of poorly concealed pain, and the Matoran before me’s expression changed from a nervous search for approval to sudden, knowing concern.  

“You’re hurt,” she said, matter-of-factly, all desire to continue the tradition of respect for Toa seemingly evaporated. “Please, come with me.” She took my hand in hers, only a tiny bit smaller than my own, and pulled me in the gentlest manner towards the village. “My Teacher and I can heal your wounds, at least for tonight.” She pointed to a larger, farther hut, and started to walk, guiding me like she was teaching a freshly built Matoran.  

I didn’t protest, any help to get the painful debris and venom out of me sounded like the greatest thing in the universe at that moment. But others in the village spoke in whispers again, the ornately-armored Matoran's behavior seemingly catching their disapproval. Usually, so-called "good Matoran" had respect for their Toa and didn't drag them around, but I found her abandoning politeness for the sake of my safety to be far more important, at least right now. Before reaching the hut, I saw a Turaga step forwards from her seat, a look of concern and confusion behind her mask, but little more as I bent over to fit under the door’s hole, talons twisting in my flesh, digging in and causing sharp, shooting pains I had to endure, a quiet hiss of pain exiting my mouth. I closed my eyes as I pushed into the hut, only opening them when it hinted at slightly subsiding.  

When I opened my eyes again, I was shocked to see another Toa. The first thing I noticed were her eyes! Softly glowing a piercing yellow, they were full of the same wondrous surprise that I had seen on so many Matoran’s faces before, but never on one of my equals. She blinked a moment after I did, before our locked gaze broke and she looked me up and down. It took me a few moments to even consider doing the same to her.  

“A Toa...” she said, her voice quiet, but still full of the same wonder. When I finally was able to look at the rest of her, I saw a similar mask to the Matoran that led me to her, but somehow softer, smoother, with thin inset lines and gentle curves giving her an inviting appearance. The smooth blue mask was painted like the Matoran who guided me, a warm, sparkling copper pattern traced over it. “What brings you to our quiet little Koro?” She asked, as I slowly moved from a squat to a kneel. 

“I was protecting some wayward Matoran.” I said, her question snapping me out of my entrancement. “I won’t be staying long, so I won’t burden you.” I urged, hoping I wasn't imposing on anything at all. I knew firsthand that resources were often hard to come by for villages like these, and hated feeling like things were wasted on a traveler like me.  

“You can stay as long as you like,” she said, reaching a hand out to me. “We’re a quiet village. You’re the most exciting thing to grace us in a long time, Toa...” She trailed off, a soft tone waiting for me to answer hanging in the air. It took me a moment to catch it, as my eyes were studying her hands, the metal worn down and painted over.  

“Ohmeni,” I said, hastily, as if I were rushing to catch pottery falling from a table. “Ohmeni, Toa of Lightning.” I completed my introduction, properly, the sense of haste dissolving, as I took in the room around me, consciously trying to avoid distraction and remain stoic and measured, as all good Toa should. And yet... something about the presence of this pair, Toa and Matoran, both clad in cool blues and warm oranges and beautiful patterns, put me at ease, and something felt unnecessary about that emotional front.  

“It’s good to meet you, Ohmeni.” My eyes couldn’t help but be drawn towards hers, where I saw the corner of her eyes scrunch into a warm, welcoming smile – and I felt mine do the same, involuntarily, but I didn’t even think of stopping it. “My name is Pysie, and in case she hasn’t properly introduced herself, this is my apprentice, Ghavialia.” She took my hand in a gentle embrace, more a preliminary inspection than a greeting, but one that immediately sucked in all my attention. She gave a quiet, contemplative “hmm”, as she ran her fingertips over my armor. Finally, she looked up and spoke, while inspecting the rest of me that she could see. “You’re clearly quite the warrior.”  

“How could you tell?” I asked, before silently wincing at the foolish question. She ran a hand over my arm, tracing a large, patched gash. The signs were all over my body. Scratches, cuts, and dents covered my armor from head to toe.

Pysie chuckled, a little sadly. “Your armor looks like a mess.” She pulled away from me, now kneeling close. “I’ve seen Toa hurt before, but... well, when’s the last time you got your armor fixed up?” She said, tilting her head a little. “I mean, really fixed it. Not just emergency patches.”  

I started to open my mouth, but closed it again just as quickly as I realized that I... didn’t really remember. I took a deep breath in, until the sudden shooting pain cut it short, and the air left my lungs as I gasped suddenly in pain. My vision went blurry for a few long moments before clearing as the Matoran held a pot underneath my face, a spiced aroma wafting through my mask as I breathed in. After I took a breath of the stuff, my head started feeling clearer, if a little dizzy, from whatever herbs were in it. “Th... thank you, Ghavail, Gha-” I stammered, struggling to pronounce her name before I was politely cut off.  

“You can call me Gava for short; everyone does.” She used the same matter-of-fact tone she had before, no resentment or judgment, simply a focus on her patient, who was, unfortunately, me. After a few seconds of me breathing it in, Gava took the pot and lidded it, placing it on a small wooden shelf, the top bumping against the wall of hardened, layered leaves. I looked back to Pysie, and realized that in my brief moment of panic, I had tensed up, taking a protective stance. My body had decided that I was under attack, but Pysie placed her hands on my shoulders, and gently guided them into a relaxed position, before lifting my back up, unfazed by my reaction to the tiniest moment of vulnerability.  

“Now,” Pysie said, quietly. “Where do you hurt?”

[lilac-udon]

romance blue print for this au, it’s really fiction

I never think this through

sunny -> basil-yes in love but stupid, definitely like basil accompany bc he is lonely but deny most feelings towards him, at first it’s bc he thinks basil is human, then the I’m just the worst person I caused death. Both of them are mentally ill so they never communicate their affection because reason

Later part he give up whatever they are and just go with basil , he knows he likes him and basil seem like happy to follow whatever sunny desire, he is indecisive because of mari, which later he felt better w basil which caused conflict in his mind

basil->sunny- obsessed with the idea of death, but also slowly got attached of the changes of someone can and only ever be aside without leaving or dying before him, he would followed whatever ppl wants, a bit of unaware selfish tendencies shows when he wants sunny attention to himself , same as sunny, unspoken rules but very comfortable getting comfy with him , actually really stressed out getting actual indication of others loving him

Kel -> basil- in love with basil. He idealizes starting a family or being with someone because of loneliness, and how his father and mother relationship. Problems is not knowing basil enough, and basil intentionally hiding info about himself form kel because don’t want to hurt him or think they will keep this way and kel passion will fade . They are really nice to each other . Kel just always thought he love basil and whatever happened he just wanted basil happiness (so if sunny and basil became a thing, good for them) it actually goes more and more neutral till the day he got heartbroken

I got tired and this make no sense

Omori ->basil-not much opinion, good food and interesting, noting beyond that, also not letting sunny be with basil is what sunny deserves

Omori->sunny- (middle finger if he could) think sunny a cat and too indecisive, don’t really want to care about him but they sadly share a body, actually still listen to sunny wishes, even though he won’t admit, really rough ways but he is the one trying to take care of sunny , he is very hungry

Basil ->omori- the more straightforward person that is alike sunny, acts more childish, wants to take care

Sunny->omori- who ? to, other me please help me , acceptance, try to make Omori less aggressive, but like how

Kel-> sunny- respectful and sorry for him, best friend, actually someone who understands him, and plays with him sometimes(kel -wow i thought I was childish, never know your too) deep bond

Aubrey-> sunny- respectful (not saying, and just a bit fan girl, just a tiny bit) sunny and Aubrey is more like study group or teacher student for my blue prints, yet to be finished

Sunny->Aubrey- really pretty person but I felt like she hate me, worried about her, try to warn her

Kel-> Aubrey- friend, got tempter but funny and nice to talk to, sometimes wisdom sometimes just fooling around, helping her with her stuff

Aubrey->kel - stupid wolf boy, actually good companion but won’t admit, hope him have a better future them her

Basil-> Aubrey- jealous, if I’m a woman would sunny like me more , a little scared of her because she always seems angry towards him

Aubrey-> Basil- jealous, you will never die , why can’t I be like you , also other complicated emotion (? yet to be finished

Hero-> kel- deeply sorry but don’t know how to fix their relationship after he been avoiding the problem, busy doing other stuff to occupy his goalless life, he isn’t really trying to fix it because he’s really busy, everything in his life seems perfect besides himself and the incident he hurts kel

Kel -> hero- it hurts a bit but get a life on his own, happy to see his bother succeed, feel like he needs to be happy about his current life but has difficulty to communicate with hero, he knows but he doesn’t know how to

hero-> mari-admired/ also a lot of emotion I don’t want to talk about bc spoilers and I felt people would just get the wrong idea, yet to finish

Mari -> hero- the same ,yet to reveal

Mari-> sunny- complicated ,yet to reveal

The blueprint element will be: protective, plan B

[no-face-girl-76]

The camping trip.

Dear diary,

Today was the best day ever. I went camping with my friends Luna, Bella and Kayla. It started off with us all being a mess, Mary and Luna stayed up way too late last night. Kayla forgot the second air mattress and I forgot my slippers.

The four of us all got ourselves situated and planned out how we were all going to fit on one air mattress. We are going to have to all cuddle side by side.

Mary asked if we wanted to go swimming and we all took turns changing in the tent while Kayla blew up the floaties. We all went down to thé water and jumped in, it was mid September and freezing! The view was amazing, clear water and sky, the sun shining down on my skin. I felt like I was melting.

We were all sipping our drinks and talking but I could feel Kayla’s eyes on me. My top teased my nipples, if I shifted the wrong way I knew she would see everything. My bottoms were a cheeky cut. They fit me perfectly. I made eye contact with her and she shyly looked away. She said the suns right in my eyes but I could see perfectly fine. Luna and Mary didn’t seem to notice.

The four of us eventually finished our drinks and started getting cold so we went back to our campsite. Luna went to change first, while Kayla started the fire. Mary poured us more drinks even though it was 4pm and we were already very tipsy. We roasted hot dogs and marshmallows until we all felt a little sick. We talked until 11pm when we noticed it was an hour after quiet time. We packed up and crammed into the tent.

It was freezing in the tent and we all called out where we wanted to sleep. Luna on one end, Mary in the middle beside me, me and then Kayla on the other end. It was only a queen size mattress so we had to spoon, I didn’t mind. I didn’t realise how touch deprived I was. I wanted to be in the middle. It was perfect. We laughed for another couple hours and then Kayla asked if she could warm her hands on me.

She put them on my stomach at first they were freezing. The touch felt nice and comforting. The others passed out, occasionally snoring.

K-“can i move my hand higher? It’s cold here now.” She asked

“Yeah”

she slowly drifted her hand up, her cool hand just slightly under my boob.

K-“higher?”

“Yeah.”

Her hand caressing my boob. Her leg was wrapped over me, in between my legs, just teasing my desperate clit. Her cold fingers slowly caressing my nipple, I was desperate I wanted it and so much more. I hoped she wouldn’t stop and think about the two other girls sleeping inches away.

K-“is this okay”

“Yes.” I Saïd sheepishly

Mary and Luna had already fell asleep. But I still felt guilty. what if they woke up? what am I even doing? Why am I turned on by my best friend right now?? But it felt so good. She slowly rolled my nipple in her finger and I felt them get hard. I heard her chuckle. I could feel my face get hot and red. My breaths became deeper.

K-“do you like this?”

I could hear the smile in her voice.

« yes, but Mary and Luna are right there »

« we don’t have to do anything but I do not think they are waking up. Besides, I'm just warming my hands, right?»

I felt her knee slide down a little bit. It was right on the sweet spot, it took everything in me to not start grinding against it. I was throbbing, it’s been so long.

Her hand moved slowly down my side, creating goose bumps along the way. Then she slowly went back up

« I’m sensitive «

she chuckled

K-« I know…do you want me to stop? »

« No » I said sheepishly.

I can’t let this go too far, our friends are right beside us. What if they wake up? Her hand slowly but firmly rubbing all the way up to my breast and down to my waist band made me crazy. Oh god how I wanted her to make the next move. She sat up

K-« can I kiss you »

« Yes »

K-« Here? » she asked with her thumb making tiny circles right above my pant line.

« Yes »

She sat in between my legs and bent over me, one hand holding her up and the other holding my waist. She moved her thumb upwards

K-« here? »

« Yes » I almost moaned

She slowly made her way up my body asking before every kiss. She knew right were to kiss to make me crazy.

« her hand grasped my boob,

K-“here? »

I couldn’t help it anymore

« yes » I moaned.

« We have to be quiet »

she said as she lowered her head on to my nipples.

She softly kissed them, over and over. She stopped for a second, leaned in and whispered

K- « do you want more »

Fuck I wanted more so bad. Her hand slowly rubbing my body while she softly teased my nipples. I could take it anymore, I started to grind on her knee.

« please » I begged

K- « god you are so pretty when you beg »

She started sucking lightly and teasing with her tongue, switching sides every couple of minutes.

K- “Do you want more”

“Please” I whimpered

She slowly and firmly kissed my body, making her way all the way down. Her hands firmly placed on my sides.

“Do you want me to take these off” she tugged slightly on my waist band.

“Yes”

K- “yes what?” She asked

“Please” I begged

She slid off my pants, keeping my panties on. She slowly ran her thumb over my clit.

K- “do you want me to kiss here”

“Please” I whimpered

I could feel my swollen clit throbbing, begging for attention. Her soft lips kissed it through my soaked panties.

K- “do you want me to take them off?”

“Please” I said already out of breath, my body felt like it was going to explode.

She slid them off. Kissing from my knees all the way down. She teased all around my clit, she wanted me to beg.

“Please “ I begged

I could hear her smile.

K- “tell me what you want”

“More”

She lightly sucked on my clit

K-“This?”

“Yes” i moaned

She lightly sucked and teased with her tongue.

K- « do you want more?´

« Yes »

She slowly moved her hand down

« Do you want me inside of you? »

« Please » I begged

Her warm fingers slowly slipped in, her other hand dragged down my body to my lower stomach. She applied some pressure and started moving her fingers a little faster, she was hitting my G spot and it felt like heaven.

« Do you want more »

« Yes »

She went a little faster and sucked a little harder. I was so close

K- « I want you to ask to cum »

« I’m going to cum » I moaned

K-« no » she slowed down

« I’m so close » I whined

K-« I’m not done with you yet »

she slowly took her fingers out and teased your clit with them. I couldn’t take it anymore

« Please « I begged

She slipped her fingers in massaging my g spot. Her tongue slowly teasing my clit.

« Please, I’m going to explode »

K-« good girl, cum for me » her fingers sped up, and she sucked harder.

My whole body tensed up

« Oh my fucking god » I moaned

I came. Soaking the sheets, I felt like I had come out of my body.

She kissed my clit softly, and I slowly regained consciousness.

K-« you taste so good »

She slowly kissed up my body. Her hand rested on my stomach.

K« Hey, you okay »

« Yeah, I’m just recovering » I chuckled

K »you did so good.”

She resumed kissing my stomach all the way up to my neck, her hand still holding my waist. I wish I could stop time and feel this forever. After a couple minutes go by she asked,

K-“do you want to go skinny dipping with me before they wake up? We smell like pussy and it might be hard to explain.”

Oh my god, I completely forgot my friends were right beside us. She handed me a towel

K-« come on »

We quickly run out of the tent and down to the water.

K- « on three we drop our towels and jump, you ready? »

« oh no its going to be so cold »

K- «one…two…three!”

We jumped in holding hands. It was absolutely freezing!

« I can’t believe we just did that »

K-« I can » she chuckled

The end for now…

[erin-bo-berin]

more with singleteenmom!reader x Steve harrington!! Please! We all need it!!

I’ll be happy to! Here’s another little blurb because my heart is warm for dad Steve 🥺 also I applies I might’ve gotten a little carried away.

You better believe Steve is so involved with baby girl from the moment he meets her.

Early in your relationship, every time he comes over, he’ll just pick her up and kiss her all over her face until she’s shrieking and giggling with joy.

“How’s my favorite girl?” he’d ask.

You joke that Steve is only dating you for the baby cuddles although you don’t mind one bit because you can’t help but fall in love with him just a bit more every time you see him with her.

Steve wants to help with everything. Feeding her, baths, bed time, although his first time changing a diaper, he was so confused and worried.

She’s at the stage where she’s a lot more active and fussy when it comes to having her diaper changed because she just wants to be on the go. The pure worry on his face when she’s throwing a fit crying is heartwarming, but a bit hilarious.

“What’s wrong? I’m not hurting her am I?!”

You obviously reassure him that it’s not him, she just hates staying still for a diaper change at the moment.

“Hey, it’s okay sweetheart. I know this isn’t fun, but I’ve got you, yeah? I’ll get this done and over with soon alright? Wanna hear a funny story? So yesterday Dustin thought it would be funny—“

You just might be a bit amazed as you watch your daughter’s howls slowly turn into sniffles as she becomes enraptured about Steve’s story about Dustin’s latest prank on his friends. You’d never seen her so calm for a diaper change.

It’s a new task and he’s a bit clumsy at first, but soon he gets the hang of it. When the diaper is on and her onesie back on, he picks her up, wiping her face of her tears.

“Now that wasn’t so bad, was it?”

She immediately melts into his shoulder, her head falling into the crook of her neck, her eyes drooping.

“Ah that looks like the problem. It’s time for someone’s nap isn’t it?”

Steve is always so cute asking if he can do something. He looks at you, asking if it’s okay if he rocks her to sleep and really, how can you say no? You settle him with her pacifier and the little stuffed bunny she likes to have and leave him to it.

He sits down in the rocking chair, placing the pacifier in her mouth and she instantly starts sucking on it.

“Do you want your bunny too?”

Her little hands grasp it, holding it to her chest between him and her.

“Would you like to hear a story?”

Her head now resting on his chest, she sleepily gazes up at him, fighting sleep as hard as she can.

“Okay. Well, once upon a time there was a little princess. She was tiny, but she was mighty. That’s because her mommy, the Queen had raised her to be. Unfortunately, the evil King had no interest in his daughter the Princess which I personally think is a shame because the Princess happens to be the most amazing little person. So is her mommy. Then, along came a peasant boy. He wasn’t Royal. But he instantly fell in love with the Queen. He loved the way her smile lit up her face every time she smiled. How sweet and kind she was to others. How even though the peasant thought he had no chance with her, she gave him a chance. He was the happiest guy ever. You wanna know why? Because she is the best thing ever to happen to him. You are too, my little princess.”

Steve glanced down and noticed she was fast asleep on his chest, but he couldn’t help but sit there a little longer to rock her before taking her to her crib.

Little did he know that you’d been outside the door listening to it all with a smile on your face and love in your heart.

•

Bath time is always interesting with babies. But if Steve gave her a bath? He made it a whole production.

“Now what is Mister Ducky doing huh?”

She’d babble back at him, still not entirely fluent in actual English, more so baby chatter.

“Did he really? He had no business doing that to Mister Cow.”

You laughed as you handed him the baby shampoo, eyeing the bath toys your daughter was playing with.

He would gently wash her hair, making sure to keep any suds out of her eyes as she happily played. Usually you could tell when she was over bath time because she’d start to fuss, tears coming soon.

As soon as the last suds were rinsed out of her hair, Steve would pick her up and wrap her in her towel.

“Hey, none of that okay? See, it’s over and we can get you into your pajamas all nice and warm okay squirt?”

•

Steve loves buying her things. Frankly, you can’t get him to stop. He spoils you and your baby girl way more than he should, but he happily does it.

One day, it might be a stuffed animal, one that she loves to play with.

Another time, it may be a book. He knows how much you like to read to her. Your little girl loves being read to, so books are always part of the gifts. Sometimes, he evens asks to read them to her. When he isn’t, he’ll sit in with you while you read to her. Besides, if Steve is around, your little girl wants him near.

Speaking of, she grows so attached to Steve that every time he comes over, she’s going to him. First, she crawls her little tushy off—the proper way, unfortunately not backwards much to Steve’s disappointment (just kidding)—and raise her hands to be held.

“Teve! Teve!”

As she grows, she’s always pulling herself up by his pant legs. Her vocabulary has been growing with her motor skills and it transforms to, “Teve, up!” when she wants to be held.

It seems like in a blink of an eye that she’s toddling to him, her steps still a bit awkward, but she’s on the run towards him when he comes over, a big smile and arms raised to him.

Steve was there for her first steps because of course he was. He’s always with you or you’re both always with him. Whether it comes to him coming over, the three of you going out or even hanging out with his other friends and children, you spend a lot of time together.

You just happened to be at a party/get together that Nancy Wheeler was throwing at her parents’ house. Not like a high school party, but just one with good food, good friends and plenty of fun. Everyone is there from her and her boyfriend Jonathan, Robin, all six kids and of course, you, Steve and your little munchkin.

Of course, they’d all met you and your daughter before but Steve loves to show her off as she’s his own which honestly, she might as well be. He’s as involved and proud of her like she is. You wish she was his, but you know she is his daughter in every way that counts.

He’s toting her around on his hip, occasionally letting her roam free with the kids to entertain her as she’s definitely into her exploratory “let’s get into anything we can get our hands on” phase.

“Steve! I think she’s trying to walk!” Dustin exclaims.

He turns around, along with you as you watch your little girl pull herself up on the coffee table that’s in front of the couch in the basement of the Wheeler house.

You’re both ecstatic as you watch her walk, still holding onto the table, as she takes steps.

Steve crouches not too far from her, holding his arms out.

“Can you come here sweet girl? Can you come see Steve?”

She looks at him hesitantly, as if afraid to give up the hold and support the coffee table gives her.

“You can do it, you don’t need that ‘ol coffee table. Come see Steve. I’ll give you cuddles.”

She giggles, letting go of it, taking one tentative step, then another.

“That’s it! You got it! Just a few more steps!” He’s beaming so much now. Even if she were to stumble and fall on her butt now, he would be so proud of the baby steps she’s taken.

But she keeps going and with one, two, three more steps, she stumbles into his arms where he scoops her up with joy.

“You did it! My baby girl did it!”

He lifts her into the air and she squeals, everyone else who’d witnessed it too, cheering and awwing at the sight.

He kisses her cheek and she replies by putting her mouth on his nose making him laugh even harder—with joy, excitement and pure love for her, you and all of his friends.

“Thank you for the kiss. Can you give mommy one too?”

He bends her to you where she leaves a sloppy open mouth kiss partially on your cheek.

“Now, how about some ice cream huh?”

“Steve, you’re cleaning her up if you get her as messy as last time!” you holler after him.

Which of course, he doesn’t mind. The most mundane things are the best time as long as he’s with you and his munchkin.

[helpimhyperfixating]

Join Me - Jotaro x Reader

Word Count: 1316

"Y/N, join me." Jotaro murmured as he pressed a kiss into your shoulder, his arms wrapped around your waist from behind.

About two minutes ago, your husband had entered your office, clearly intent to annoy you as much as possible, determined to distract you from your work. Or at least, that is what it looked like in your eyes.

"Jotaro, no. I have to work." You protested, wriggling your arms out of his hold so you could continue writing.

Hugging you even closer now that your arms were out of his hold, Jotaro placed his chin on your shoulder and softly started trailing kisses all over your jaw and neck.

"Jotaro..." You sighed, doing your best to decline him. He was making it harder and harder to do so though.

"Baby..."

You stiffened a bit and Jotaro smirked against your skin. He knew how weak you were for that nickname, which is why he only ever used it sparingly. Deploying it in moments like these so that you would become jelly in his hands.

"You've been working all day. Just come join me in the bath for now."

Your resilience nearly broke but you steeled yourself at the last possible moment. "I'll be able to relax more when I'm done. In just a few days this project is over, then we can do whatever we want."

Jotaro had already expected this answer however. "You need a break, you're pushing yourself too hard. I'll carry you if I have to."

"Why are you so insistent on this?" You turned your head to look at him, only for your eyes to widen and a squeak to leave you when that action gave him the perfect angle and range to plant his lips on yours.

He firmly kissed you, almost pleading with it as he tried to coax you to come with him, trying to keep his lips on yours as he pulled back, hoping you would get the hint and move with him and get out of your chair.

You didn't however and instead broke the kiss, smirking a little when you saw a tiny pout on his face.

Jotaro wasn't one for giving up however and he moved his face closer to yours again, pushing his forehead against your temple. "You can take your work with you, otherwise what did you make me buy that bath tray for. Just join me."

"I made you buy it for when we want snacks in the bath." You grinned but Jotaro's expression didn't change, his forehead still against you.

"Baby, please." There was that nickname again and that was enough to break you, making you give in.

"A-Alright, so long as you'll finally let me focus on my work." You stuck out your bottom lip a little bashfully, looking off to the side while you could see Jotaro smirk from the corner of your eye, content that you had finally given into him.

- - - -

Sitting in the bath, you were hunched over the tray where all kinds of papers were now strewn over it.

You had been diligently working, doing your best to keep your hands and wrists out of the water so that it would not stain the papers, your husbands legs on either side of your body while you were sitting up, bent over your work.

Jotaro boredly watched you as he sat behind you but finally had enough of staring at your back. He got you in here to relax and cuddle with you, goddamnit, not for you to ignore him and keep slaving away.

"Good grief, Y/N." With an eye roll, he wrapped his arms around your midriff and pulled you down onto him, intent on making your back lean against his chest.

The sudden pull surprised you and you yelped slightly as your pen flew out of your hand, tumbling through the air and landing somewhere on the bathroom floor.

Your back crashed into Jotaro's chest and you could feel your spine crack and protest from the sudden new position, having been pulled out of your hunch from before.

"Oh, wow. Ow." You groaned, earning a chuckle from the man behind you. You immediately tried to change your position, maybe get up, but Jotaro was quicker.

In a flash, he had his arms firmly wrapped around your torso, keeping you from sitting up, all the while his legs encased yours, being wrapped around them. You were completely caged in by him.

"Jotarooo." You whined half-heartedly, more out of obligation than actual want, cause the satisfying crack and stretch of your back clouded your thoughts.

"Hm?" He hummed directly against your ear, having pressed his cheek to the side of your head as he held you close.

"I gotta work. You said you'd let me focus and continue working." Jotaro could practically hear you pout as you spoke and had a hard time containing his smile. God you were adorable, turning to putty so easily in his arms so that he could hold you close.

"I did let you work." Was his smart reply as you felt his arms tighten a bit around your form. "Now I just want you to focus..." His hand caressed your side a bit. "...on you and me." With that, he slowly sank down in the tub until the water reached your chin, your head still resting on his clavicle.

Figuring that fighting any more was useless, you just sighed, a sign to both Jotaro and yourself that you had given in. You knew that when he got like this, there was no changing his mind anyways.

"Good girl." You swore you heard Jotaro mutter that into your hair, barely audible for even himself.

Star Platinum suddenly manifested, lifting the bath tray with your work and setting it aside on the sink's countertop, out of the way, before disappearing back into its user.

Now that there was no longer a tray obscuring your view of a large part of the bath, you couldn't help but giggle softly as you looked at your entwined legs.

Now, the two of you knew Jotaro was a tall man, and when buying the house you kept that in account for almost anything, but even so, with the two of you cuddled in the bath like this, Jotaro proved to just be too damn tall.

While your toes were grazing the edge of the tub, Jotaro needed to pull his legs up a bit, the way he had wrapped around you making his knees stick up out of the water, your legs nestled in the hollow of said knees, comfortably holding you close.

"The water's gone cold, that is how long you made me wait." Jotaro then huffed, lifting his leg from yours to instead softly rub his foot up and down your calf.

"Sorry." You whispered, finally sinking completely into your husband, much to his delight. He didn't know why, but feeling your full weight lean on him always made him so happy. Like you trusted him so much to allow him to carry you, hold you, care for you while you were at your most vulnerable; allowing yourself to relax completely in his presence to an extent where you let all your muscles go slack, no need to stay on guard when he was around, not even to hold yourself up.

"It's alright." Jotaro's reply was barely above a whisper himself, pressing a small kiss right behind your ear before he unwrapped one arm from your waist, using it to turn on the tap and let hot water back in. Meanwhile, he used his foot to pull out the plug, not feeling like letting go of you just yet.

"You're so needy sometimes." You grinned softly even though he couldn't see.

Jotaro just tightened his arms around you at that, pulling you just a bit deeper into his chest.

"Only for you."

[salazarslytherin]

full (r.l x y/n)

requested: yes! [hi i got a request! can u write a smut where remus has a breeding kink and he’s scared that it’ll freak the reader out but she’s actually rlly into it n he just cums a lot into her (this is probably the spiciest thing i’ve ever typed in my life 💀💀)] send in your own request here!

🃛 masterlist!

cw/tw: tiny bit of angst at the beginning, insecurities?, breeding!kink, slight degradation, fem!reader, handjob, fingering etc. just SMUT.

word count: 2.3k

a/n: i hope you like it y'all! if you do, pls do reblog/follow!! x

☯︎ join tag list here tag list: @marvelslut16, @siriusbarnesslut, @marimorena06, @weasleysbitch2, @reg-arcturus-black

Remus had been avoiding you for the past three days. Three days since you’d spoken to your boyfriend, two and half since you’d even seen him. It sucked.

The reasoning behind it was somehow worse - you’d tried to tell him you wanted to sleep with him, and he had literally run away.

So you were set on finding the boy and talking it out , and if it came to it, breaking up with him.

You didn’t want to be with someone who didn’t want you, especially to the extent of intentional avoidance.

You were in a relationship, not an extended game of hide and seek.

So you’d concocted a plan - Tuesdays were when the other boys had quidditch practice, and Remus would be in his dorm on his own for at least three hours, studying, doing homework, or whatever it was that he would do on his own.

Now, today was Tuesday, which meant that tomorrow morning you’d either be very satisfied, or very single.

You weren't even quite certain what you'd expected to come out of the confrontation – a screaming match where you found out all the reasons why he didn't want you? A startling confession where you found out that your boyfriend was a virgin?

Nevertheless, you stalked towards the Marauders' dorm room, intent on confronting him, only to falter as you reached the heavy doors, hearing sounds coming from the other side.

Registering what the noises were, you ground your teeth loudly, clenching your jaw as you gripped the doorknob.

"Oh fuck off."

⚔︎

You slammed the door open, Remus rolling off his bed in shock at the sound.

"Are you joking?!"

Remus looked at you in confusion and fear, kneeling beside the bed with his head peeking over the side, a sheepish blush coating his cheeks.

"Um, Y/N, do you mind? I was kind of in the middle of something..."

You let out a laugh of exasperation, throwing your schoolbag on the ground in frustration.

"Yeah, I know. I could hear you outside. Am I just so unattractive to you, that I basically tell you to fuck me and you had to run away from me? You'd rather fuck your own hand than me?!"

Bending over to pick up your bag, you could practically your heart breaking as Remus scrambled to put on his pants.

Your fears had been confirmed – he didn't find you as attractive as you found him, and it hurt. You just wanted to run far, far away from him, to hide yourself away and be able to release the tears that were threatening to escape.

But as you turned to run from the room, that familiar grasp landed on your wrist, stopping you from leaving the dreaded place.

"Y/N, wait–"

"No, I get it, okay? I don't need to hear you say it out loud."

Your voice cracked as you tried to wrench your hand out of the werewolf's grip, unable to hide your sadness and hurt as you were turned to face the boy.

"Y/N! Please, let me explain myself, please. If you want to leave afterwards, you can. I just, please?"

You didn't really want to hear his explanations, but some masochistic, yet hopeful, part of you wanted to know just why he didn't want you.

Maybe you could change for him?

You relaxed in his arms, still not quite looking into Remus' arms as you no longer made any attempts to run away.

"You're right, I did run away from you when you said you were ready to sleep with me."

Your eyes squeezed shut, not wanting to hear the rest of his words.

"But that's just because I was afraid you wouldn't want to be with me anymore if I told you what I wanted."

Your eyes opened slowly as you lifted your head to look at the boy, your brows furrowed in confusion as you peered at him.

"What d'you mean?"

It was Remus' turn to become flustered now, his hands moving from your side to cover his face in embarrassment.

"I–okay. You know how you thought I ran away from you because I didn't find you attractive?"

You nodded, still half-convinced that was the truth, the reason why he'd avoided you for so long.

"It, it was the opposite."

You raised a brow in disbelief, unable to stop a skeptical laugh from escaping your mouth, Remus' hands falling away from his face so he could look into your eyes.

"It's true! I, fuck this is embarrassing, and you're probably going to run away from me if I tell you the truth."

You crossed your arms with a huff.

"Well right now I'm not quite certain there is a 'truth' that you speak of! I'm quite certain you're just making it all up, trying to hide the fact that you think I'm unattractive."

Remus grit his teeth, his hands gripping your shoulders firmly as if to shake you awake.

"No! That's absurd. I, I find you so bloody attractive, and, fuck it I'm just going to say it and if you break up with me I won't even blame you. I've been having dreams of you and I, but in those dreams," Remus' hands relaxed from your shoulders, falling to his side in embarrassment, "I would, um, cum inside of you, and uh, fill you with my pups."

Your jaw fell open at the boy's admission, his right hand rubbing the back of his neck uncomfortably before continuing to speak.

"And I've never even thought of that before! I think you're just so bloody hot that you've awoken some sort of primal instinct inside me, I just want to ruin you, and–and breed you. Fuck this sounds so creepy doesn't it."

You were incapable of shutting your jaw at this point. This was far from what you thought you'd hear from your boyfriend's mouth today.

"Y/N... I've scared you away, haven't I? I mean, of course you'd be freaked out..."

The boy continued to mumble to himself, terrified that he'd ruined your relationship, certain that you'd break up with him.

Contrary to what he thought though, you found his words incredibly hot.

And you'd be damned if you didn't make that a reality.

⚔︎

In the middle of Remus' ramblings, he was barely able to register that you'd moved towards him, placing your hands onto his cheeks until your soft voice rang in his ears.

"Remus?"

The brunette's eyes snapped to meet yours, gaze darting between each of your eyes as he awaited your words.

"Fucking ruin me, please."

Before the last word even left your mouth fully, Remus was already on top of you, his lips capturing yours hungrily, like you were his first meal in weeks and he was dying to have you.

As Remus devoured you, he backed the two of you onto his bed, his legs lodged between yours as you gripped onto his neck, eager to have him.

You arched your back as you were overcome with need, trying desperately to grind your clothed cunt onto his hard-on, but the boy only tutted at you, moving away from your lips to push your hips down on the bed.

"Such a desperate little slut, hmm?"

You only whined in return, trying to grind into his legs that were between you, Remus smirking down at you.

"Take your clothes off love."

Your hands moved to unbutton your school shirt without a second word, fingers moving in a flurry to throw it off before tossing your bra across the room, Remus moving at very much the same speed as he removed his clothes.

You both quickly found yourselves naked, admiring each other through lust-filled eyes as the boy lowered himself slowly towards you, his lips ghosting over yours as you laid yourself back down.

"So beautiful."

His lips quickly captured yours, both your hands exploring each other's bodies for the first time – tingles of excitement running through your bodies.

Your hands traced his scars as his ran down your curves, him stopping to suck in a breath as you cupped his cock, fully hardened under your fingers.

"Fuck, don't tease me Y/N."

You only licked the boy's lips in return, but was treated with a taste of your own medicine as his hand brushed your lower lips softly, tracing your slit teasingly slowly.

"Remus... Please."

Your cupped hand became a grip – encircling the werewolf's member as you began to pump up and down his shaft slowly, eliciting a low moan from Remus.

He responded by slipping a finger into you, the kiss broken as both your lips were preoccupied with a mixture of swears and moans, asking the other to hasten their pace as you two built up your orgasms.

"Wait, fuck stop. Stop Y/N."

Remus' other hand came to stop your hand as he kept himself up on his knees, pulling away from your close contact to look into your eyes.

"'m too fucking close, wanna cum inside you."

You swore you could feel your eyes darken at the boy's words, and so did his.

"Then fuck me."

⚔︎

Remus gripped your thighs tightly as he kissed down your body, spreading your legs and leaving a kiss on your soaking centre. You let out a shaky moan as he planted his tongue against it, licking a stripe up your lips.

"For next time."

The boy moved back up your body, his head hovering over yours as he looked down at his cock, pumping the already erect shaft before tracing his head along your lips.

"R-Remus, please. Want to feel you inside me."

The boy tutted at you mockingly, before sinking himself inside you slowly, moaning at the feeling of your walls stretching around him.

"Fuck, you're so tight baby."

You moaned around him in a mix of pain and pleasure – his fingers not at all preparing you for his cock, stretching you in a way that none of your exes could ever compete with.

"You're so big Re, please, fuck."

Remus pressed a wet kiss to your forehead, his face contorted in pleasure as he awaited your green light to start moving.

After a moment, you nodded as the feeling of being full sent tingles down your spine, letting out a loud moan as the boy began moving out of you slowly, shifting himself so he could grip your hips more firmly for support.

"F-faster."

You muttered out as you clenched your walls around Remus, your orgasm already building from when he prepared you.

"Yeah, my desperate little slut wants me to go faster?"

His hips hastened the speed as his words made you whine loudly, his head lowering to leave kisses on your neck, marking you for the world to see.

“I’m close Re, fuck.”

“Me too princess.”

The boy buried his face into your neck as he began twitching inside of you, his speed faltering for a second as he let out a moan that could border on animalistic, cumming inside you.

The feeling of being filled more than you knew possible pushed you over the edge as Remus continued thrusting his seed deeper into you, moaning as your walls fluttered around him, cumming at the feeling of your boyfriend inside you.

"You look so fucking gorgeous right now love, such a good little cumslut for me, hmm?"

You could only whine in response as Remus continued fucking into you, his cock hardening yet again at the thought of you full of him.

"Gonna look so pretty filled with m'pups, love. Going to fill you up over and over and over again, watch my cum leak out of you because of how full you are."

You moaned at Remus' filthy words, turning to kiss his neck, softly nibbling on his earlobe as you gripped onto his shoulders.

"Yes Re, fuck. Fill me up, feel so good with you inside me. Making me feel so full. Wanna have your pups, want you to cum inside me. Make me yours Re."

It didn't take long for a second orgasm to start building, and it definitely didn't help that Remus had moved one hand to start rubbing at your clit, making you moan at the overstimulation.

"Feel good, hmm, love?"

You nodded into the boy's neck, your eyes squeezed shut as pleasure coursed throughout your body, unable to process proper words. The only sounds that filled the room were the sinful slaps of skin against skin, and a faint noise that made you blush.

It was the sound of Remus' cock slipping in and out of you, slick with the combination of both of your cum.

"Re, I-, fuck, close, again."

Unable to string together a proper sentence, your walls began fluttering around Remus yet again.

"So am I love. You feel so good, making me lose control. Wait for me, we'll cum together."

Your eyes rolled backwards, waiting for Remus. The task seemed impossible as pleasure pulsed throughout your body, your toes curling and legs shaking at the feelings.

"Re, please, I need to cum so badly. You feel so good."

Your nails dug into Remus' back, the feeling burning into him and making him groan into your neck.

"Yes, fuck Y/N. Cum with me love."

Finally able to release, you let out a moan that bordered on pornographic, seeing stars as your eyes squeezed shut much harder than before. You felt ropes of Remus' cum hit your walls, another animalistic groan reaching your ears as he bit into your neck, making you moan softly in the midst of a post-orgasmic bliss.

Panting, your chests rose and fall in tandem as Remus fell on top of you, his cock limp inside you. After a moment, he spoke up.

"Y'know you squirted?"

Your eyes shot open, staring at the boy who craned his neck to look down at you.

"I-, what?"

The werewolf let out a boyish smile, tongue running over his teeth as he stared down at you.

"It was hot."

[sukirichi]

— falling out of love with gojo satoru

warnings: angst, mentions of sexual content, cursing

masterlist !

when you fell in love with gojo satoru, your heart exploded like a firework.

you still remember that moment very vividly at the back of your head. it was new year’s, and you two were drunk on both liquor and the feeling of having the other by your side. it was a tough year – as the norm was for jujutsu sorcerers – but you both made it out alive.

alive couldn’t even begin to describe how you felt that day.

satoru has always been the person who stuck by your side through thick and thin like how you were the one who always went against the higher-ups when they tried to limit his capabilities. you should’ve known then, that the higher ups were just the beginning. that when once you thought their oppression for satoru’s plans were nothing but microscopical compared to the barrier his family had placed between the both of you.

they didn’t like you.

he was a gojo, the strongest jujutsu sorcerer, while you were...well, you.

you weren’t really anyone special or better than anyone. your technique was decent and had a lot more drawbacks than advantages that you had to improve your physical abilities instead to not be deemed a total useless tool.

satoru never saw you that way. to him, he admired you almost as equally as he cherished his best friend, suguru, so much so that the three of you become the best of friends in the blink of an eye. the more time you spent together, whether alone or with others, it felt like your world just hyper focused or snapped into tunnel vision, zeroing on no one else but the white-haired man whose smile was brighter than any other in the sky.

when he told you he loved you, you couldn’t distinguish which ones were the exploding new year fireworks or the drumming of your heart. you stared up at him then, lips falling open as you released a tiny breath of air, and satoru laughed. he actually laughed.

you wanted to tease him, to punch him even though you couldn’t really ever touch him just to get over the fact he had you losing your composure with eyes glossing over. “well,” he taunted then, one shoulder lifting up lazily. “aren’t you gonna say anything? if you feel the same way, now’s the best time to tell me. we can end the year as friends and start another one as-”

satoru never got to finish his sentence. you had jumped into his arms faster than the speed of light, hands yanking down his yukata to pull him towards you, your lips slamming on his almost greedily.

he didn’t mind. he never did.

for once, it felt as if his infinity never existed. you had both spent the night tangled under the sheets, your name rasped from his lips like a prayer. the way you kneeled for him just moments later with your eyes fervently closed made him feel like he’s the one being worshipped instead, and in a way, it was. you loved him – way too much that you no longer cared how much it would hurt the day after when he never gave you a break and kept you pulled closer to him.

you loved him – way too much that you no longer cared how much it would hurt if ever the time came that you no longer felt the same.

contrary to how you fell for him, you fell out of love with your best friend quietly. your shared apartment would still be filled with his annoying mannerism of dragging his feet over the floor as he walked, always groaning and complaining that he was hungry but never really bothered to cook anything for himself.

it felt a lot like living with a child where you were his mother, but in that sense, satoru hated it whenever you worried for him.

“you’re not my mother, stop telling me what to do!”

“stop being so arrogant, satoru!” you pointed to the barely conscious child in his arms, the first year student still barely breathing because satoru had gone out of his way again and brought yuuji while he fought a special grade curse. “you may be strong, but not everyone around you is capable of handling what you can! stop dragging people into your mess and start using your goddamn brain for once!”

“you don’t know anything, so shut the hell up.”

you scoffed, hands placed on your hip while you blinked back the angry tears that threatened to fell. you worried for yuuji, you really did, but in reality, you just couldn’t handle seeing gojo pushing himself to his limits and coming back home more wounded than the night before.

“i’m just worried for you, satoru. i don’t want you getting hurt.”

“i’m the strongest,” was all he said – was what he always kept saying. “i’m not going to get hurt.”

“you may not,” you reply stiffly, “but what about me? don’t you think about me? don’t you think about how much it hurts me to see you this way?”

you told yourself you hated him. you hated how arrogant he got. it was good he was confident of his abilities and prided himself of such an honourable title, but satoru was human. he was bound to fall at some point.

eventually, you got too tired.

it was too tiring to keep waiting for him to come home unscathed. you were assigned different missions all the time. satoru would always be working overseas while you mostly helped train the kids and exorcised curses from time to time; no missions that were as dangerous as his.

in the dead of the night, when you were turned away from him in your bed that had already gotten so cold from his usual absence, satoru would slip beside you as silently as he could. the morning afterwards would always be the same: good morning, did you sleep well? he knew the answer. he knew you never slept well without him, but he’d ask just to be nice, and it wouldn’t take too long before you’re both late to work because he missed you too much from being away all the time that he wanted to feel you clamp around him one more time.

it was tiring. too tiring.

that heavy weight never left your shoulders. you cried yourself to sleep far too much that you’d lost count – until you reached a point you just felt nothing. the bed no longer felt cold – just empty. his side always remained untouched, his chair in the dining table barely used, and you’ve gotten so used of washing only your plate and utensils that you wondered if satoru had ever been there.

you wondered if it was a coping mechanism; that maybe you could just no longer handle the pain of having to worry about him every damn night and he’d never care enough to at least be a little more careful, and this was why you just stopped missing him, which was why you just started enjoying the silence in your apartment a little bit more than you should.

but if it was a coping mechanism...why did you feel a lot freer and happier in his absence? instead of it feeling like you were supposed to be distracted, you felt awakened. alive.

alive in the same way he told you he loved you while the skies painted different hues of red, blue, green, and yellow in the darkness that bore witness to your souls connecting that night – the same sky that was now patiently watching as your souls split in half and formed itself whole all over again.

contrary to how you fell for him, you fell out of love with your best friend quietly.

there was no longer someone singing made up songs in the shower. there would no longer be that sound of an annoying loud kiss down the bride of your neck or the smacking of his palm on your ass when he wanted to piss you off.

you fell out of love him so silently that when he crawled next to you that night, you didn’t even hear him. and for the first time in a long time, you slept well the moment he left before the sun stretched its wings across the horizon. when you were greeted by nothing but your own pair of slippers outside your bedroom and not even a post it note to tell you he’d already left for work, a smile tugged on your face.

you made your breakfast in peace. satoru no longer dared to come back home if he was injured because he knew you wouldn’t care enough to fix him up.

although of course you would, but nothing ever beats in your heart for him anymore when you dab the disinfectant across his cut lips. satoru would catch your wrist then to tug you to him slowly, empty eyes staring back at his sky blue ones.

“thank you. for patching me up.”

“you’re welcome,” you’d smile, climbing off his lap while closing the first aid-kit. “go get changed. i’ll cook something up for you.”

it was a silent, empty routine. satoru would thank you for fixing him up because he was never every sorry for worrying you. he’d keep being reckless again and again until he reached a point you no longer cared for him enough to say goodbye to him with a kiss and the slow, tender promise of be safe – i’ll wait for you to come home.

you still kiss him – more out of habit than anything – but you’ve changed.

i’ll see you tonight.

it was empty, silent, completely different from the fireworks he’d ignited within you when he told you he loved you. satoru wasn’t dumb, and he didn’t need his six eyes to see that you’ve grown too comfortable over the large space between you and him between the sofa, almost as if him being away was what felt home for you.

he was never a confrontational man; he hated each waking moment that lead to this, but he had to do it. he needed to do it – to set you both free.

when the commercials started playing, satoru lowered the volume down, voice low and serious as he turned to you. you easily picked up on the sudden tension in the room – the first thing you’ve felt ever since you’ve fallen out of love with him – yet nothing changed. when satoru sighed, your heart didn’t ache.

“well,” he chuckled nervously as he leant back to his side, “things have changed, don’t you think?”

“yes.” there was no point denying it. you knew it – he felt it.

“what do we do now?”

you had no answer to his question. despite the fact you no longer looked at him the same way, not once had it crossed your mind to leave your apartment. not because you wanted to hold on as much as possible to whatever memories you shared under this roof, but simply because you didn’t know where else to go.

it wasn’t like it made a difference anyway. satoru barely came home, and when he did, he made his presence as scarce as possible that you could no longer tell what difference it would make if he was here or not.

“i don’t know,” you admitted, knees hugged to your chest. “what do you want to do?”

his answer came in the form of opened doors. you leant against the doorframe, watching as nanami and even yuuji came to help satoru move his stuff out of the apartment. he found a better place somewhere in the upstate, somewhere much closer to bars and clubs – which you know he thoroughly enjoyed it prior to meeting you – and your mind immediately went back to the time you and satoru first moved in.

it proved to be a difficult task. you both wanted to move in and finish unpacking as soon as possible, but satoru was too eager to christen each part and corner of the house that you both ended up making more mess.

nights spent tucked into each other because the heater was broken and you were both too tired to sleep anywhere except the uncomfortable mattress played like a broken record in your mind. satoru’s laughter echoed when nanami complained that he should stop spending money on souvenirs so he could’ve hired professionals to help him move out instead, your head snapping up at the source of that carefree, sweet laugher that always had butterflies erupting in your stomach.

as if feeling your gaze on him, satoru’s eyes flitted to where you stood. when he smiled, you could tell each genuine apology rang behind it – all the words he never got to say staying like a broken glass that kept cutting him over and over again.

he loved you. he still loves you.

and maybe, tucked away in the deepest parts of your heart that no longer felt fond of him the same way it did before, still held a little compassion enough for this man you once wanted to spend your life with.

you weren’t unkind. you didn’t need to love someone to know when to forgive them, but just for this moment, just for him, you could pretend to for one last time.

smiling up at him with your eyes crinkled and the last bits of adoration for everything about him gleamed through your lashes just before it slipped away into nothingness. it was enough. it was enough for satoru to know he’d been forgiven, and it was enough for him to finally set you free.

the next time you saw him at school, there were no longer fireworks.

your heart was at peace.

[be-ready-when-i-say-go]

Anklets and Necklaces

Inspired by this tweet.

@5-secondsofcolor I’m not sorry.

Female Reader insert. NSFW Content (18+). My smut writing is hella rusty. So I do apologize, whoops.

_______________

Calum plays at the anklet, spinning it around and around her joint as her legs are crossed and resting in his lap. The gold jewellry is hardly ever taken off since he gave it to her. In return, she gifted him a chain with a tiny pendant with her initial etched into the back of it. The front of it is an arrowhead. He wears it so often now, that when it’s off, he feels a little incomplete. It’s an easy gesture to carry her everywhere with him.

“Okay we gotta decide what to eat for lunch like now or I’m going to get hangry,” she states.

Calum glances up from his phone, to see her still scrolling on hers. “Oh no. Not hangry,” he teases. But he knows she means it. Her warnings have about a thirty minute window, just enough for a delivery if they get something simple. Or if they want something more complicated, they need to find a snack now while the main course is cooking. “What do you want? Thai? Mexican?”

“Would you hate me if I said I really just wanted nuggets from McDonalds?”

The pout on her lips makes him laugh, “No, I could never. Usual then?”

“Yes, please.”

Stretching across the length of her, Calum pushes his lips together, trying to ask for a kiss. She laughs in return and squeezes his cheeks. “Be lucky you’re cute,” she states before lifting up slightly to meet his lips. “And squishy.”

“Ain’t nothing on me squishy,” he huffs, straightening back up to put her order into the app.

She sets her phone down on her stomach, gazing up over the sharp line of his jaw that his plump cheeks sit atop. And while it’d be easy to return with a poke and a verbal jab about his cheeks, she just watches him. His fingers deftly work over the screen. The white tank sits as a stark contrast to the depth and glow of his skin. “I think all the right things on you are squishy.”

“Yeah, what are those?”

“Your cheeks. And as much as you and your trainer kick your ass, I know happy weight when I see it.”

Calum grins, a chuckle shaking through him as he sets his phone down on the arm of the couch--the order completed on his end. He pinches at her thighs. “Take that back.”

She shakes her head. “No, I don’t think I will. I like it--just like I like my cookies. Hard on the edges gooey in the middle.”

Standing for just a moment to let her legs fall onto the couch, Calum kneels onto the cushion, hovering above her. Her eyes glitter just a little as she talks and the soft easy smile on her face lets him know that it’s all out of love--what’s she’s saying. The pads of his fingers run along the side of her thigh. “Be lucky I love you.”

“I am already lucky, so say what you gotta say. Roast me, my love. It’s not like we don’t do that anyways.”

And truth be told, Calum had no response. Not when he looks at her, because God all he sees is the person that’s been with him on his bad mental days. She’s been there when Calum was sure there was no lower low or higher high. And what do you say to that person that’s been there, seen all of you that there is to see? With a gentle and chaste kiss, Calum settles for silence.

“Cat got your tongue now, huh?”

This--this Calum can respond too. It’s all too easy. “I know what else my tongue can have.”

“I know something your tongue can have too.”

“Really now?” Calum asks, dragging his fingers over the top of her thigh and tracing the line of her lounge shorts. “Food will be here in fifteen minutes though. So that’s up to you.”

“Not nearly enough time to savor it. Besides,” she starts and takes a pause. Her lips pull into a side smile and Calum knows what that means. One brow quirks in anticipation and Calum watches her. The silence settles for a little too long.

“Besides what?” he prompts again.

“Besides, I need the mail to be delivered first.”

“What did you buy?”

“You’ll see later. I promise. It’s really not even supposed to be used for lingerie. But I’ve wanted these for a long time and I specifically have a set I’m trying to complete.”

There’s the black mesh set that she’s slowly been building out. The main piece came in weeks ago, at this point it might even be months ago that that came in. He was privy to it then and gave it the christening that it deserved. But there wasn’t any other lingerie set that needed expansion. Not at least to his recalling. “Which one is it?”

“I’m not saying.”

“Oh please,” he whines, dropping his head into her neck. His lips softly and slowly seal kisses into her warm skin.

“No, Calum. I’ve been waiting on this package for weeks. It got held up in customs and I-” she sighs at his lips sucking at her skin. Not hard enough to cause a bruise, but just enough to make her spine tingle. “You’re going to have to do better than that.”

Calum pushes up, with a huff, sitting back down on the opposite end of the couch. “This is killing me, you know?”

“Well, you ain’t dead yet. So I think you can tough it out for a little bit longer.”

“Begrudgingly--I want you to know that.”

She sits up, swinging her feet to the floor. “Your sacrifice will be duly noted. The mail will be here before you know it.” The couch releases her weight and Calum watches her pad into the kitchen. “Do you want anything?” she calls.

“I’m good,” he returns, knowing that he will be counting down the seconds until the mail comes. She returns with a glass of water, sitting back down on the couch, but bringing her feet up underneath her as she motions to the TV. “You watching that?”

Calum answers with a shrug. He wasn’t anymore. He originally turned it on mostly for the weather and some news. He found himself bored and flipping through channels before settling on the sports channel while he took care of Duke in the morning. Noise to fill the space since his brain needed the distraction. He hadn’t slept all that great the last few nights, decent sleep. The closer and closer the band got to putting out music the more his nerves kicked in--sometimes they were sneaky. The nerves come up faster than Calum had anticipated. And right now, they won the first round. But Calum was working hard to combat them so he could get about his daily life.

“Go crazy,” he finally verbally responds. And she picks up the remote, changing channels too fast for Calum to even understand how you could process what was on before decking it was a no. She eventually settles for HGTV--not quite caring what show was on. 

The first knock that comes to the door is the food that Calum ordered for the two of them. He answers it, popping up in the hopes it’s the mail. When it’s not, he sighs just a little but places the bag down onto the coffee table. “Your nugs, my queen,” he teases.

“Thank you, my good sir,” she returns with a grin, opening before divvying out what is for who. “You wouldn’t have happened to shot up like a bat outta hell because you wanted that to be the mail?”

Calum feels the heat in his cheeks, but bumps her shoulder gently. “No, why would I ever want that?”

“Oh I don’t know,” she scoffs in return, dunking a nugget into the sweet and sour sauce. They share a soft bout of laughter before turning their gaze back to the TV. Duke’s paws click as he ventures into the kitchen for a drink of water from his bowl. The lapping and splash of his tongue echoing just slightly as the screen goes dark between the show and the commercial break.

Calum lifts his gaze, taking in the soft angle of her jaw. She curls up around the carton of fries, eyes glued to the screen. Does she even have the slightest clue what she does to him? It’s not even the involved things like dressing up for him, or comforting him. It’s just her, when she’s munching on fries. Or when she sleepily walks behind Duke in the mornings. It’s when she hums as she cooks. It’s the dancing she does when she’s cleaning. It’s the pouts when she messes up on something and her brow furrows in as the determination settles onto her face.

It’s when she fucked up a birthday cake for him once--not greasing the sides of the pan enough and then adding a tad too much milk--called him crying about it and then in a minute flat resolved to make him brownies instead. Because she said she’d be damned if she didn’t make him something sweet to nibble on or pass along to the guys. And Calum’s not even that much of a sweets guy, which she knew, so she only settled on giving him half the batch she made. She, of course, saved the other half for her and her friends.

And it’s just the moments that she’s not even trying that makes Calum melt. Like when she paints her nails, she offers to do his first. Or when she lays down next to Duke, and in their shared silence, they seem to communicate everything with each other.

“I love you,” he states.

She turns, eyes widening for a second before grinning around her sip of iced tea. “I love you.” Her brows furrow just a little. “You okay? You’ve hardly touched your food.”

“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine.”

“If you didn’t want McDonalds, I could’ve done something else. Literally anything else,” she continues on almost as if she hadn’t heard him.

“It’s not the food,” he giggles. Calum reaches out to caress her cheek. “I’m okay.”

She nods. “Okay.”

“I just love you, that’s all. Wanted to share it with you.”

Her grin is soft as it lifts her lips. “Good because you’re not getting rid of me that easy.”

“I wouldn’t dare dream of getting rid of you.”

Another silence envelopes them. Calum finishes his food and takes the empty containers to the trash. Another episode starts up from the speakers and just above it, he hears the chime of his phone. “Do you want me to screen it for you?”

“Yes please!” If it’s one of the guys, they won’t mind her answering. If it’s someone important, he doesn’t want to miss the call.

“Calum’s phone,” she answers but he can already hear her feet shuffling to him in the kitchen. “Okay, Ash. I’ll keep that in mind.” Her voice comes closer and Calum shakes his hands just a little to get rid of the excess water before drying them. “No, I can’t say what it is without taking a look. Did you use the soil I recommended last time?” Another pause comes from her and when Calum turns, he finds her leaning up the kitchen counter, phone halfway pulled down but not fully away from her ear. “Yeah, I definitely think you should consider changing soils. But I can take a better look tomorrow for you. I’m going to pass along the phone now.”

She hands the phone over. “He said it was important.”

“Thank you,” Calum says in a whisper, pressing a kiss to her forehead and then placing the phone to his ear. “Yeah, Ash?”

Calum’s not even sure how long the conversation goes on. At first, it is important information that Ashton’s trying to confirm--a date and time for a meeting that they had later in the week. He says he wrote it down where he writes down all their meetings but it’s not there. And Ashton’s trying to make sure that he doesn’t miss it. So Calum shuffles to his office and verifies in his calendar the time for the meeting.

But then the conversation diverges--they start talking about everything and anything. So much so, they’re laughing. Calum doesn’t even hear the knock at the front door. But he does notice her scurrying off into the bedroom. The door closes with a soft click. Duke comes trailing after her but notices the closer door and then keeps down the hall to the office. Calum reclines back in his seat trying to get another angle at the door. But it’s closed fully.

“You okay, gramps?” Calum asks Duke.

“Oh fuck off, mate!” Ashton laughs.

“Not you, you fucking egg. Duke--I was talking to Duke.”

“Oh!” Ashton giggles. “Sorry, I thought you was trying to talk shit.”

“I don’t have to try and do that to you.”

“Oi, don’t start something bro.” The two of them laugh and Calum bends down to scratch behind Duke’s ears. “Alright, thanks for confirming that meeting. I’ll see you tomorrow in the studio?”

“Yeah--bright and early. Talk to you later.” The call ends and when Calum spins around in his desk chair, his jaw drops as she steps out from the bedroom. It’s not exactly something new--as in something that she’s never worn before. But it doesn’t mean he ever gets tired of seeing her like this.

The white bustier pushes her breasts up and almost over the cups. And he travels the look down, taking in the baby blue skirt, fishnet knee highs. And he goes back up, taking in a black strap wrapping around her thighs. She notes the lustful gaze and steps right on the line of the threshold to the door.

“So,” Calum starts, trailing his gaze down and then back up to her face. “Not the black lingerie I was anticipating.”

“No, I’m waiting for the heels I want for that lingerie to go on sale. Besides, you didn’t like the collar I liked so I’m still searching.”

“It wasn’t that I didn’t like it. It’s just too similar to one we already bought.”

“You’re right, but still.”

Calum cracks a smile at the reluctant confession. “But enough about that. This--this is a cute outfit.”

She nods, smoothing out the pleated mini skirt. “It’s less about the outfit and more about these,” she says, tapping at the thin black band.

“And those are?” Calum asks. It’s one step closer into the room and Calum think he can make out a heart shaped metal loop in the middle of it. She takes a second step closer and Calum can see clearly it’s some sort of thigh garter--leather or something related as the material. “Oh,” he breathes.

She continues slowly to approach Calum and when she’s just in arms reach, she lifts the skirt up. It goes up inch by inch and Calum’s entranced. Watching more of her thighs revealed to him. And soon it’s black panties--mesh and if Calum remembers correctly crotchless. But wrapped around her waist is another band of leather. Two pieces hook to another metal hoop right on her hip bones and then one trip connects the top piece to the bottom.

“A harness garter belt--what do you think?” she asks in a whisper.

Calum exhales, desire stirring in the pit of his stomach. He reaches out, wrapping his fingers around her thighs and pulling her into him. He kisses in the spaces between the leather, gingerly, lips hardly touching her skin. “I think you look beautiful,” he hums, dropping his head on his neck to look up at her.

Her eyes are still closed and Calum softly runs the tips of his fingers up her thigh, tracing the lines of the harness. With a deep exhale, she finally blinks back to reality. “Not too silly?”

His brows meet in the middle of his face. Why would she think it’s too silly? There’s nothing silly about her standing in front of him, clearly excited about her own purchase. “Angel--I’ll be damned if I ever think this is silly.”

Swinging her leg over and settling onto his lap, she grins. “Thank you, love.”

Calum holds onto her hips, rubbing his palms down to her ass. “So you said this technically isn’t lingerie?”

“No--I don’t think so. But I think they could be--a small accessory to something I already have.”

They share a kiss, much too quick for Calum’s liking so he pulls her back in for more. And her arms wind around his neck as he continues to palm her ass. Here, he doesn’t really care what it is technically or not. She looks absolutely amazing. “I like it. In fact,” Calum starts, moving to grip her thighs before housing them both up and then plopping her down on the desk. “I really like them.”

Calum stands between her legs, nose brushing and bumping against hers. Here, she can feel her core aching as Calum’s fingers trail closer and closer to her heat. It’s feather light--his touch, but it makes her feel electric all the same. “Cal,” she hums.

“Yes baby?”

There’s nothing that comes out of her mouth but a small huff, a rushed and harsh exhale at the feeling of his fingers dancing across her skin. He grins pulling back just a little to see the way her face goes slack, almost as if she’s at peace with him between her legs.

“Was there something you wanted to say, darlin’?” Calum tries again, taking just a half step back away from her.

With her eyes still closed, she smiles. “I want to know,” she starts, exhaling softly to counter the thud of her heart in her chest, “if you’d so kindly want to make love to me?”

Calum can’t help his own small tuft of laughter. “Darlin’, I’d do so happily.” They don’t always wind up in bed like this--but it’s nice, to be comfortable even to be this forward with this and this open.

Calum takes her hand as she hops down from the desk. “Give me a twirl,” he asks. She obliges, turning in a circle for Calum, punctuating the back view by lifting her skirt up. “Silly girl,” Calum laughs, giving a firm but playful tap to her ass.

Facing Calum again, she wraps her arms around his torso. “But you love it.”

“I do. I love you.”

They share another kiss and she slowly walks backwards out of the room. They get lost in each other--Calum in the way she fits against him and her in the way Calum holds her, palms spanning across her back and tight enough that she wonders if he thinks she’s going to disappear but gently enough at the same time that she’d love nothing more than staying here forever in his hold.

Calum finds the zipper to the top and slowly drags it down. The material exhales, slowly falling away from her body and when it falls to the floor, he kisses her neck, down to the swell of her breast. Her moans are soft, just above a hum that makes just enough noise for him to hear. And it goes right to his gut.

Here there's very little need for words. When Calum gives, she takes happily. But when she tugs at his hair, Calum knows to step back, lets her give something to him. Her kisses are soft against his skin, but make him feel like it’s being set on fire. One that he’d happily stay in, let the blaze consume every inch of him, if it meant that she was always the one to take him.

His shirt goes to join hers. Her mouth teases his nipples as she descends further down on him. Calum thinks he sighs, all he can do is just shut his eyes and let go into the feeling of her teasing the cut of his hips beneath the sweatpants. She’s always like this, teasing him. At first, it used to annoy him. But now he loves it, loves just how close she’s willing to push him to the edge, push his buttons but always delivering at the end of it.

Her meticulous work, to watch him jump at every scratch of her nails and nip of her teeth, is enjoyable. But Calum blinks open his eyes to cup her jaw, which stops her. When her gaze lifts, Calum motions for her to stand. “Yes?” she grins standing to her full height.

Calum presses their foreheads together. “I missed you.”

“Well how dare I keep a man like you waiting?” With a slow kiss, tongues just barely dancing, Calum walks the two of them to the bed. The back of her knees hit the edge of it and she buckles just a little. Calum catches her from falling. “Turn around,” he whispers into her ear, “please.”

The instruction is obeyed and she spins to face the bed. Calum finds the zipper to the powder blue skirt and almost doesn’t want to take it off her. In the end, he does-- Calum lets the skirt fall onto a pool at their feet. Without even prompting she falls to her hands, ass grinding against his hips. He traces her spine with the pads of his fingers, following all the way down, over the curve of her ass and down to the opening in the panties. His fingers gather a bit of her arousal.

“Oh,” he groans. “So wet for me,” he hums with approval.

“Always for you,” she sighs. Calum teases her clit--a featherlight touch as he dances over her core. She lets herself fall a little bit more into the mattress--another moan leaving her lips when Calum takes one finger down from her clit to teasing her entrance.

Calum pulls away, bring his wet fingers to his lips and sucking them clean. “Taste just like heaven,” he hums. He gingerly guides her back to standing and uses her hips to get her to face him again.

More kisses are shared before they fall onto the mattress. Calum takes hold of one of the straps around her thigh and tugs her down, closer to him and she laughs. It gets caught off and morphed into a moan as Calum’s tongue licks a wide stripe up her. He’s careful of the mesh material of her panties, but knows that carefulness won’t last long. Not when her arousal coats his tongue. Not when her nails scratch over the muscles of his shoulders or tangle into the curls on his head.

She melts under the work of his mouth. The mattress merely becoming the vessel to hold the mess she’s bound to make and become. The room echoes the moans and slurps. Fingers gripping at the sheet, she chants Calum’s name. His tongue working magic over her core and just when she thinks she couldn’t possibly handle anything more, she notices the stretch at the addition of his fingers.

“Fuck,” she whines, lifiting one leg and he slips in even deeper, curling his fingers and hitting just the right spot.

Calum hungers for her pleasure--the high-pitched whine and groan as she releases. Some days it’s just the sound he needs to ground him. She gives short and breathless huffs, and quivers underneath him. “Gonna be a good girl?” Calum asks, fingers still pumping at her.

“Yes, oh yes, I will.”

“Gonna cum for me?”

“I want to, yes I’ll come for you. Make me your good girl.” Her voice sounds far away, as if she’s not fully cognizant of what she’s saying. Not quite babbling, but definitely talking so fast words bump into each other and slur together.

Calum grins, sucking at her clit again and she groans, head throwing back against the pillows. Her toes are curling--her whole body growing warmer with the passing second. The heat coils in her lower gut and she’s pleading. Though, she’s not sure who she is really meaning to plead to, but she wants to cum so badly.

Then it finally happens, one moment she’s sure she’s nearly in tears and the next, the coil snaps. She squeezes, hips raising off the bed and Calum continues to ride out her orgasm, gently pressing her back down into the bed. She hisses and starts to push at his shoulders, the signal that it’s too much. So Calum places one last kiss to her clit before pulling away from her glistening core.

Beneath him, eyes fluttering close, she looks angelic. Calum holds himself up above her and just watches the way she tries to collect her breath. “You’re beautiful, you know?” he whispers, not wanting to shatter the silence.

“No kidding?” she teases, winding her arms around his neck. The necklace dangles just a little in her face and she takes one hand to trace the chain. Hooking her fingers into it, she tugs Calum down to her. The taste of her arousal on Calum’s tongue makes her head spin. Calum caresses her side and stomach as the kiss deepens. Here is all they need--the soft and deep kisses, the moans that they swallow from each other.

Her hands leave from around his neck and begin to push down his sweatpants and underwear. And he lets her, even pulls back to kneel on his knees as she sits up. Their kiss hardly breaks and she’s quick to tug the cotton material down, hands wrapping around his length.

He groans at the squeeze--nothing too hard just enough pressure to make his whole body ignite. Her hand pumps him, once, then twice slowly and teasing him. “Baby,” he sighs, relishing the feeling of her hands working over him. The stay like that only for a minute or two before Calum pauses her to step down and full disrobe.

When he climbs back onto the bed, he crawls over her. “Welcome back, handsome,” she greets.

“Oh, it’s so good to be back,” he returns, grinning.

She runs her fingers over the tattoos decorating his chest, out of habit, out of something to ground her for a moment. There’s no way he’s real and it shouldn’t ever shock her like this. But sometimes it sneaks up on her and the realization of how madly in love she is with his man hits her all over again.

“What are you thinking about?” Calum asks.

“How much I love you,” she answers softly.

“I love you too,” he returns, bending down to kiss her. It’s soft and sweet--the kiss. For a moment, they just inhale the breaths of the other. It’s a tender moment, one that neither one wants to interrupt, so they let it linger, smiling at each other. She stretches up to kiss him, one hand trailing between their bodies and Calum catches the hint all too quickly when she traces along his length.

“I haven’t forgotten, love,” he exhales in a breathy laugh. “Trust me, I could never forget.” Once lined up, Calum’s slow to sink into her. One, he wants to drag this out, enjoy every inch of him that she grips of him. And two, because he wants to make sure that even in the lull that she’s ready to take him.

Her head falls back, hair pushing into the pillow and neck exposing itself to him. A tempting sight but Calum loses himself in the feeling of her wetness. He’s slow, pulling out just a bit before sinking further back into her. Her sighs and words of encouragement are soft from beneath him but they fuel him.

The pace quickens and both of them groan at the ecstasy. Out of reflex, she lifts one leg to readjust her hip flexor and Calum brings it up, resting her ankle on his shoulder. He kisses over the joint and the anklet, savoring just how much of her he can feel like this.

The chain dangles in her face, brushing in the valley of her breast and she revels in the feeling of Calum reaching the full depths of her body. She digs her nails into his flesh, more curses falling from her lip. But some of them get lost in the groans that win out. “God,” she huffs. “You’re everywhere.” And though it’s a bit of strain to get the words out because Calum’s pace is relentless as he snaps his hips into hers, she pushes the words out.

“You always take me so well,” he praises, watching the way her face contorts. “Oh, so soon, love? You’re going to cum again for me so fucking soon, like a good girl.”

Her whine slips out first but she nods, feeling the coil tightening yet again in her lower abdomen. Her body is hot, and she can already feel the prickle of sweat on her forehead. “Please, baby, please,” she begs.

“As you wish,” he hums, his own orgasm approaching faster than he anticipated. His body humming as the warmth spreads. The bed rocks just a little, hitting the wall and the sounds echo around them as they sigh and moan to each other. But the only thing that really matters to them, is each other.

“Fuck, baby,” he whispers, voice straining as she orgasms. No noise comes from her, but her mouth opens like if she had the breath she’d definitely be screaming his name. This time the quakes last longer, her whole body shaking. “You’re okay, you’re okay,” he hums, bumping his nose against her jaw, still riding through her orgasm.

“Shit, oh my god,” she shudders, wrapping her arms around his neck.

There’s a slight hiss when Calum moves again, and he kisses over her face, starting with her nose and then moving to her cheeks. Another quake takes her and Calum, not anticipating it, groans-- his orgasm now right on the edge. It won’t be much longer, but she nibbles at his earlobe. “Thank you,” she whispers. “Made me feel so fucking good. I want you to cum in me. So fucking deep,” she hums.

And while Calum’s trying to get his own rebuttal to the tip of his tongue, she squeezes around him. “Fuck,” he yelps just a little, his body erupting with his orgasm. His body shudders and he’s so blindsided by the feeling, his slips just a little, more of his weight settling onto her than usual.

She doesn’t say anything, just hums at the feeling of him succumbing to the pleasure. “Oh, that’s what I wanted,” she encourages. It leaves her throat like a purr and Calum shivers again at the sound.

They lay together, for a moment, her nails scratching lightly at the muscles in his back. Calum sinks into her, body going heavy. Her slight shift squeezes around him and he groans, sensitive. “Don’t--I can’t,” he laughs.

“Sorry. Didn’t mean to.” Even her own voice sounds heavy and slurred. She kisses his temple and Calum pushes up. He’s slow to pull out, enjoying the drips that follow of his own release spilling out of her. With one finger he gently scopes it back up and into her. The familiar twinge of desire pulls at his lower gut and it’s almost enough. She even shivers, but Calum watches the way her eyes stay closed.

“You okay?” he asks.

“Sleepy now,” she returns.

“Let’s get cleaned up first and then we can nap.” His voice sounds farther away towards the end of the sentence and she assumes he went to the attached bathroom. The rush of water from the sink confirms it. Something wet and warm presses against her--no doubt Calum with a warm washcloth.

The clean up is swift as both of them share a shower and then under the sheets, they curl up around each other. Calum kisses the top of her head as she nuzzles in closely. “I want pancakes after our nap,” she mutters.

“I think we still have some blueberries.”

She pops up onto her elbow and grins a little. “It’s like you can read my mind.”

Calum laughs. “Maybe just a little bit.”

[tommyspeakycap]

Please write one about making fun of Jack for being jealous over the fact that your baby is getting more cuddles from you. Thank youuuuuuu

Mama’s Boys

“He’s just gorgeous,” Karen coos softly, her finger gently brushing over the sweet baby boys little face as he lays snugs swaddled in your arms. Jack re-enters the living room of his beautifully decorated home with his dad and brother in tow. Kiera stifles a laugh as she leans closer to your side and mutters; “How many Grealish men does it take to screw in a lightbulb?” To which your lips stretch wide across your face with her laughter-lit eyes. Karen leans in too, “Hopefully not as many as it takes to fit a car seat.”

Laughter bounces through you, Jack’s mother and his two younger sisters, only fuelled by the the confused looks from each of the Grealish men. The little boy in your arms barely even stirs.

“We’re ready to go whenever you are.” Kevin announces, clapping his hands together in that very true dad fashion that indicates he’s now wanting to get going. If the way he had been trying to hint at being hungry hadn’t already suggested that. Everyone starts to move around fairly soon after that, with Jack’s mother helping you out to the car. Your two week post baby body hadn’t quite healed up yet and she had been the most amazing help you could ever have imagined. Jack was fantastic, but his mother was experienced in looking after kids and she could come over while Jack was working. He had his last game before his Christmas break just three days ago.

You sat in the back of the car, eagle eyes still too soon after birth to want to be away from your brand new baby boy just yet.

“I can’t believe we got a Christmas baby.” You beam as he helps you out the car, one around around your waist while his other hand held tight around the baby carrier as you walk together through his parents front door. It always made Jack nervous to be carrying it in case he dropped his newborn son despite how man times you reassured him he wouldn’t. “I still can’t believe we have a baby.” He admits, his voice the very sound of disbelief. His heart had been so overwhelmed with joy but his work didn’t slow down to allow him to process it, so he was still pretty much in shock that there was another tiny little human who now relied on you both for everything. “And such a perfect baby,” Jack continues as he sets the carrier with your sleeping son down carefully on the floor, “Just like his mama.” He leans in, pressing his lips softly down onto yours, hands reaching around to pull you into his chest-

“Waaaaa!”

You break apart quickly. Jack sighs in discontent with his eyes falling closed as you crouch to scoop your baby boy up into your arms and walk off into the packed Grealish family living room. Jack groans once your out of earshot. He felt like he hasn’t hugged or kissed you in forever when he had been used to getting your affection and giving you his multiple times throughout the day.

Baby boy Grealish was being fed on demand via what Jack had referred to as the “nippular method” that had you physically wetting your pants a little bit. What he meant of course was breast feeding, but the word had failed to find him at that moment. So it would be safe to say there was very little time for he and you to even be holding much of a conversation between last minute Christmas shopping, wrapping and meeting family even though Jack had assured you a million times that his family wouldn’t mind if you just took a break to relax after literally pushing a child out of you. He just wanted a bloody kiss.

He didn’t blame his baby at all, he loved that little boy more than anything he’d ever known. That’s exactly what Jack had been like. More than the world, more than his life itself. and he wasn’t surprised the bald little thing was a mama’s boy. But that did not mean he wasn’t going to pout about the little man getting more of you than he could. Last Christmas had been a day of hot chocolate sitting by the fire, constantly in his arms. This one he’d barely even touched you. That was bad enough for any man, but for Jack who is so physically affectionate and very tactile, it’s borderline painful.

“Are you alright, love?” Karen asks. Jack turns his head to her slowly, seemingly taken carefully from his trance. He was looking straight at the mantle where a picture of you, Jack and your baby boy was sitting pride of place. It was brand new and he loved it. You had the same one in your living room at home. Jack nods, but his sigh gives him away and leads his mother to sit down next to him. “Just want a bloody hug.” He admits, shrugging his shoulders and trying to hide his face for the embarrassment that creeps up his cheeks. Her mother responds to that with a small coo and attempts to wrap her arms around her son immediately, much fo his protest,

“Oi not from you eh? From (y/n)!” He protests, his mothers snot if laughter immediately meeting his ears. “S’ not funny, mum. Babies stole my fiancé.”

That only serves to make her laugh harder, also eliciting a laugh from his brother who immediately tells his eldest sister who sprints off through the house, taunting in a sing at the top of her lungs. Siblings are never too old to taunt each other like that.

“Jack’s jealous of the baby! Jack’s jealous of the baby!”

“Oi. I’m not!” He calls after her in protest, jumping to his feet just as you appear in the doorway with a cheeky glint in your eyes and a smug grin. He knows he can’t lie to you anyway, so he backs down and you giggle. The little boy wide awake now in your arms coos too, immediately attracting his daddies attention. Jack looks at you, standing there in an England Grealish 7 shirt cradling a baby boy who wears the same outfit. His heart is suddenly so, so warm. He hadn’t really been able to see his son like this, so awake and so alert for having been working so hard before the winter break finally allowed him full home time. He was going to be missing every match of January too to stay home with you guys and he couldn’t be more excited.

“You know,” you hum softly, “It would be nice to have a family cuddle, you know?”

Jack’s cheeks tint an ever so slight red, but he barely waits a moment before he wraps his arms around you and the baby, careful not to squish him as he pressed a kiss to your forehead gently.

“If it makes you feel any better son,” his dad cuts in with a clap on his back, “Our Christmas gift to you is a spa weekend and a coupon for granny-day-care.” And it very much does make Jack feel a bit better. With time, he’s surer than anything that you’ll work the intimacy and time for each other out. It’s a work in progress, a learn on the job kind of experience and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

And really, neither would you for later that evening when you’re back at your beautiful little home and Jack is the one to clamber out of bed in the middle of the night to change and put his baby boy back down to bed, you find yourself listening to him speak to that sweet little boy through the baby monitor he left on. He’s talking about how sweet he is, how much his mummy and daddy love him and how stinky he is right now but daddy wouldn’t change him for the world. And then he trails off his silly baby voice that already makes you want another.

“You’re a mama’s boy though, aren’t you stinky man?” He coos, careful with his hands fastening those tiny little buttons on the front of a blue baby grow. He picks up the two week old and holds him carefully as he always does. “But daddy can’t blame you, bubba. Daddy loves your mama so, so much. It’s something we’ll always have in common eh? We’re both your mama’s boys.”

[sisterspooky1013]

On The Flicking of Switches

Rated G | 1176 words | Read it here on AO3

“Holman asked me if anything has ever…happened…between us.”

She stilled momentarily in her typing but quickly started again, not looking up.

“Oh?”

“He was surprised when I told him no.”

She cleared her throat, sitting cross legged on what had been designated her side of the bed in their shared motel room. He was lying on his back beside her, staring up at the ceiling contemplatively.

“Sheila asked me something similar, actually. Same reaction to the answer,” she supplied brusquely, her fingers dancing over the keys with impressive speed. “She seemed to be under the impression that I was trying to divert her from you by setting her up with Holman.”

He turned his head to survey her, not missing the rapid blink of her eyes as she worked to appear unaffected.

“She kissed me, for the record,” he said with an edge of defensiveness. “It was definitely unreciprocated.”

For that he got a tiny curl at the corner of her mouth, though she still refused to grant him eye contact.

“I wasn’t under the impression that it was,” she said with a little less of an edge in her voice. “She doesn’t strike me as your type.”

“My type? What’s my type?” he questioned.

“Tall. Brunette. Buxom. Bossy.” She listed off flatly.

He mentally scanned over his past partners, and while most of them were very, very much in the past, she wasn’t entirely wrong. Perhaps he did have a type.

“Well, that may be true anecdotally, but that doesn’t mean that I’m only attracted to women who meet that description.”

She started typing a bit faster and he had half a mind to ask her what the hell she was working on, but figured he may as well let her have it if it meant he could continue this conversation.

“You’re short,” he began, and her shoulders tensed, “and you have red hair.”

“Those are certainly facts,” she replied tightly.

“And I think you’re very beautiful,” he continued. “You are bossy, though, so that probably helps.”

He saw the flush creeping up her neck and it gratified him in some way, even as nervousness coiled in his own belly. He was stone cold sober, but felt drunk with the need to know whether she shared his feelings.

“The proximity principle,” she offered, swiping her finger across the touchpad more roughly than should be necessary. “It’s a psychological phenomenon wherein people who spend large amounts of time together form closer bonds and have more positive feelings towards one another than they otherwise might, based on personality or other characteristics.”

He cracked a smile at her predictable attempt to stand firmly on logic while he nudged her towards the edge.

“Yes, I’m familiar,” he said lightly. “Psychology is my purview, remember?”

She pulled in a big breath and let it out slowly, perhaps thinking she had successfully diverted him after all. Not from Sheila, but from discussing how they felt about each other. She was wrong.

“That isn’t applicable here, though, because I’ve thought you were beautiful from the moment I met you.” He was aware that his tone, which he somehow kept level and controlled, did not at all reflect how he was actually feeling, which was exhilarated and afraid. “The point is, Holman’s question made me think about it. Wonder about it, anyway. I was curious what your thoughts were.”

She swallowed and straightened her posture a little, uncomfortable, but unwilling to show it.

“I think people have a hard time believing that a man and a woman can be just friends. Especially if they’re close in age, both single, et cetera,” she said, bringing her hand to the top of the laptop as though to close it, but then changing her mind and resuming her scrolling.

He quirked a quizzical expression that she didn’t see, and waited a beat to consider whether it was an altogether good idea to continue down this line of questioning. She clearly didn’t want to have this conversation, but he wasn’t entirely sure why. And that is precisely what he was hoping to find out.

“I don’t mean why people always assume we’re more than just friends,” he said, feeling the swell of adrenaline that would allow him to say what came out next. “I mean I was wondering why we aren’t.”

She finally turned to look at him then, a mix of confusion and annoyance on her face.

“Mulder, what are you doing?” she asked defeatedly.

He bit his lip and asked himself the same question.

“I guess I felt compelled to acknowledge that elephant in the room we’ve been artfully avoiding,” he answered tentatively, realizing a touch too late that bringing this up when they would be forced to share a bed was perhaps a bad idea.

She closed the laptop and set it on the nightstand, her posture slumping and her hands folded in her lap. She looked straight ahead, towards the TV, and sighed.

“We work together, Mulder,” she said with some measure of sadness. “It would not only be a violation of Bureau policy, it would be generally unwise.”

“So it’s because of work,” he clarified, “not because you don’t want to?”

“Not because I don’t want to,” she repeated softly, her expression vacant.

“So you’ve thought about it?” he asked hopefully.

She heaved another sigh and dragged her eyes over to him with much effort, cringing a bit as they landed on his face. He hoped his expression was neutral, but he suspected that some of the longing he felt was making its way through.

“I try not to,” she said matter-of-factly.

Sensing that he had pushed her as far as she would be willing to go, he cast her a sympathetic smile and nodded, then rolled out of bed and went into the bathroom. As he brushed his teeth, he wondered what she would say if he told her that he doesn’t even bother trying not to think about it anymore, that he gave up years ago. That lately it’s all he can think about.

When he exited the bathroom, the lights were off and Scully was curled on her side with her back to the middle of the bed. He slid in beside her, not very much space between their bodies on the full size mattress, and listened to her breathing as they both tried to fall asleep.

He wondered what the world would look like if his emotions controlled the weather. A crack of lightning every time she smiled at him, a flash flood on the rare occasion she laughed. He hoped that someday he’d have the courage to take his own advice and really tell her how he feels.

The rain started up again outside, a light pattering drizzle, and he wondered what Holman and Sheila were doing to create such a gentle, friendly mist. He suspected that if, or when, he and Scully finally crossed that line, it would result in a hurricane strong enough to wipe the state of Kansas right off the map.

Tagging @today-in-fic

[hanazuma-inactive]

Hi! Don't know if you're doing requests now or if this will interest you but... How about a Bokuto x male reader where Bokuto is usually the top when they do it but the one time he bottoms for the reader, he just can't get enough and started to beg to be fucked all the time. Maybe when they're all alone in the locker room

Its okay if you can't haha

songbird, (nsfw) bokuto x top!male reader

pronouns: he/him (FEMALE ORIENTED DNI!!)

warnings: begging, reader is a bottom to begin with, public sex (?) (fucking in a locker room where no ones there), creampie, a tiny bit of overstimulation, degredation if u squint and praise. spit as lubrication, finger sucking.

a/n: i’m writing this at 2 am with like no energy left whatsoever please excuse me if the quality isnt as good as usual and it’s a bit shorter i swear i’m trying my best im not trynna rush requests i just have a lot and theres too many things i need to work on :(

_____

"heh? look at you now kou'...cock dripping precum and i'm not even touching it! how cute~"

"p-please y/n just start moving already i want it so bad…" bokuto whimpered, settled on your cock while you relaxed on the bench. 

"if you say so, my little songbird."

dating bokuto was pretty much a dream of yours. something about his positive and silly personality really made you fall in love with him. you weren't able to confess until second year when your friends pushed you. only to find out the owl looking man had a crush on you too. which explains why he was always more cheery around you than other people, maybe a little too much but you didn't mind. 

your relationship fostered quickly due to the two of you already being friends and on the volleyball team. bokuto couldn't have been more happy, if he was already so ecstatic around you just as friends it's hard to imagine how excited he can be when you too are in a relationship. and as expected, his excitement was very well proven in other ways too. after both of you turned 18 in your third year, bokuto took you home right after drinking with your friends. 

he's been waiting for this since his second year, a few months after you two became official. you were irresistible to him. like the himbo he is, he likes every part of you. your face, your ass, and of course your cock. every part of you excited him to the max. now that both of you are finally legal, he couldn't keep it in his pants any longer. so it was that night, you lost your virginity to the man of your dreams. 

a unspoken rule but bokuto just assumed he was the top in the relationship. you didn't have any complaints about it since he was good with it. his stamina was over the roof for what an average person at his age should be. not only his stamina but also his cock. it makes you feel good everytime no exceptions. you also don't know where he learned it but the tricks he pulled off simply felt heavenly. every movement, every spot he reached and every word he said makes you closer and closer to an orgasm than you already were when you're with him. it's been like that in the bedroom ever since then and neither of you had the thought of changing it, until today. 

you two were doing your usual flirting after the clock after practice. cleaning up the courts together and hanging away the nets. all your other teammates usually just give you an eye roll and leave the gym before you even get the chance to change. leaving the two of you alone, yet again, in the locker rooms. 

"bo' are you hungry? we can grab something on the way back if you are-" your sentence was cut off when the taller male approached you and gave you a hug from behind. 

"hehe, of course i'm hungry~ only for you though," bokuto said with a grin on his face. 

"oh? what are you trying to suggest here?" you said, ruffling with his gray toned hair. 

"well, no one's here anymore and it's just us...so why don't we…" he said reaching down towards your pants. 

"sounds like a good idea to me~" you said, giving him a peck on the lips, making him blush. 

"h-hey, why don't we try something new today! i've been meaning to ask you this-" 

"oh sure what is it w-woah!" 

before you knew it bokuto already dragged your pants down and got on one knee. even a dumbass would know what he's trying to do in this position. 

"well well~ look what we have here." bokuto said with a smirk on his face fiddling with your cock through your underwear. 

you let out a low giggle, getting the clue of what your boyfriend was trying to do. 

"slow down there bo' no need to rush" you said as you removed your underwear too and let held it in your hands in front of bokuto's mouth. 

"go on, this is what you wanted right?"

bokuto was a little startled due to the change of energy from you and gulped a group of spit down his throat. but eagerly, he still began to work on your cock with his mouth. 

he was clumsy with it and you could tell he'd never given a blowjob in his life before. but you gotta admit, his attempt of trying to please you, doing something new like this for the first time was incredibly cute. he struggled a little trying to take in your entire cock and due to his gag reflex not being the best you could hear some gagging noises coming in between your thighs. 

"oh fuck…just like that kou' you're doing so well…" you said, pressing your hand into his hair and slowly adapting a rhythm. 

bokuto's eyes became hazy and you could tell he was getting lost in your cock. you looked down to see his shorts forming a wet spot where his hard cock is. you pulled him away from your cock and leaned back on the bench, leaving him begging for something to fill him. 

"c'mon, big boy, isn't this what you wanted?" 

too lost for words your boyfriend simply climbed on top of you and took off his trousers too, leaving both of your hard cocks exposed. 

"why don't we get started, suck on these fingers with that pretty mouth of yours won't you baby?" you said sitting back up and leaning a bit towards bokuto. 

"y-yes y/n…" bokuto said as he closed his eyes and took two of your fingers into his mouth, gradually taking three. 

"that's it good boy~ but…i think you've had enough of that now." you pulled you fingers out of bokuto's mouth, leaving him yet again empty. 

"lean in on my shoulders ko' that's right...just, like, that" 

you slowly moved your already wet fingers into bokuto's ass, starting with two to loosen him up and moving on to three to further stimulate his pleasure point. 

"a-ah fuck! y/n what is that! i-it feels weird…" he whined as you pressed again and again on his prostate. 

"oh you'll see bo' it'll make you feel so much better in just a minute…" you said pulling out your fingers and pushing bokuto back in a position where you can see him while he rides you. 

"go on, i know you want it inside you~" 

you could tell bokuto was nervous but he gathered the courage to place your hard cock inside him, with a lot of effort of course. he moaned in pain and pleasure as you enter him entirely. waiting for him to settle in, you cup his cheek to tell him how good he's being. 

"heh... look at you now kou...cock dripping precum and i'm not even touching it! how cute~"

"p-please y/n just start moving already i want it so bad…" bokuto whimpered, settled on your cock while you're relaxed on the bench. 

"if you say so, my little songbird."

you began to move, answering his request. slowly of course, you didn't want to hurt him being his first time and all even though you know he likes it rough. as your thrusts became harder and faster you could hear bokuto's painful moans become more pleasurable ones. 

"y-y/n fuck me, oh fuck me it feels so fucking good!" 

"yah baby boy? you like that don't you, such a slut for my cock, filling you like it's the only thing you could think of." 

sooner or later bokuto couldn't hold it in anymore, his pre was leaking a lot more and you could tell he was close. 

"y/n i'm coming oh fuck~" 

"fuck...me too bo'!" you said while cumming inside of your boyfriend. one hand stroking his cumming and already sensitive cock and the other grabbing onto his tight ass. 

needless to say he passed out from the pleasure coming from both his behind and front, leaving you holding him in the mess the both of you made. 

"guess we might have to change some rules in the bedroom now huh?" 

[chocominnie]

One Last Time 01  —  Pjm. (M)

⇢ pairing: Jimin X Reader

⇢ Genre: Idol!Jimin, Exbf!Jimin, model!reader, sad au, fluff, tons of smut, angst

⇢ Synopsis: Your idol ex boyfriend Jimin cheated on you. You two have been broken up for a while now and the media has been keeping track of you and him. You’re trying to get over him, but the things that happen inbetween makes you re-think the entire breakup, and so does Jimin…

⇢ Song : xxxxx

⇢ Word Count : 4.3k

⇢ Warnings: dominant jimin, makeout sessions, this is honestly a sad angsty au, cheating, pregnancy, unprotected and protected sex, a bunch of sex, no really a LOT of sexual themes too, I know I’m forgetting some but sorry in advance!

⇢ Copyright: please do NOT repost, translate, or modify my works in any way, shape or form, on any platform. If found doing so , it is considered as plagiarism and appropriate LEGAL action will be taken

⇢ Authors note: This is my mini series for the summer! Get your tissues, things to take your anger out on, and sit back and watch the drama unfold. Shall we begin?

The winter’s coldness is hardly enough for you to bear. Even though it’s just the beginning, Seoul is known to just go from season to season without a fucking warning. Not only that, but the first snowfall is going to come soon. The weatherman has been talking about it non-stop for the past few days. It’s going to be a brutal one he says but he says that every year so why believe?

Turning off your alarm, you take a few minutes to collect yourself and stretch. Barely any sleep once again but that’s an everyday thing now.. without Jimin. It’s been some rough months not having his body wrapped snugly onto yours. These days you long for his touch, but completely dread at the same time for very good reasons.

Your kitten greets you with small licks on your thigh in which in return you pet her head softly with a smile.

‘‘ At least I still have you babygirl. You keep me company. “ You coo softly while grabbing your phone off the charger. Texts from your best-friend just spamming you with love and apparently she’s coming over. Great. That’s normal.  But one text catches your eye. Jeon Jungkook.

You furrow your eyebrows as your finger slides to open it after typing in your password. In relief, he’s just checking up on you as always. Rolling your eyes, you muster enough strength to actually pull yourself out of bed. The cold tiles hit your feet like icicles. You jump from from foot to foot cursing yourself for not turning on the floor heaters as you walk out the room. Clara, your kitten, follows you out purring nonchalantly with a few meows here and there.

‘’ Alright Clara I hear you. Im getting your food now.’’ You chuckle, grabbing her food from the bottom kitchen cabinet right under the sink and pour her half a cup of cat food and a whole bowl of water.

After snacking on your morning granola bar you prepare yourself for your morning routine. Shower, brush teeth, skin care, get dressed, clean. Your phone dings once more just before stripping yourself of your clothes. You don’t bother to look it’s probably just a social media notification.

Drying your hair with a towel as you get out the steaming hot shower, you head straight for the mirror. Dark circles remain under your eyes from months of barely any sleep. You sigh, and gently rub under them. Jimin is the cause of this. Why would he do this to you. Surely enough he would not like to see you like this at all. The worriedness he would have over you is huge. But he has moved on and you just have to accept it no matter how in-love you still are with him.

As you clean up around the living room, another ding from your phone occurs. A groan escapes your lips as you place the pillows back as they should be. In hopes of it just being your manager giving you some good news, you let out a sigh and plop yourself down on the grey suede couch. Three new messages. Jeon Jungkook, who has text you twice, and Ryan your bestfriend. 

‘‘ Damn it Ryan why must you consistently text me twenty four sev- “

“ Beause I need to know if you’re okay.”

You jump and drop your phone onto the hardwood floor from the voice that comes from around you.

“ Holy fucking shit you scared me! “  You whine, turning around to face your best-friend. She smiles and holds out her arms for a hug. You roll your eyes and open yours waiting for her embrace.

“ Oh i’ve missed you so so so so so so so-”

“ You just seen me yesterday..” Your voice sarcastic and bland as you let go of her. You sit on the couch first followed by Ryan sitting right next to you.

She looks good today, the navy blue coat she has on suits her very well. Although, you cannot figure out why she decided to wear leggings today. It’s going to rain a bit later but you disregard that seeing as though she’s the fashion deisgner and not you.

You. The model and seemingly ex girlfriend of one of the biggest solo idol in the world right now. Thats what they call you in the news, headlines in magazines, and real life as if you don’t have a real name and just was his acessory. Your modeling career had taken off way before dating him. The world, or Seoul to say the most, didn’t acklowledge you to that point yet. 

“ Okay but still. You know we should be roomates. It’ll be easier for me to watch over you. “

Your head turns towards her quickly shaking no, “ I don’t need to be looked over im 20 years old.”

Silence takes place for the next few seconds. You know what she’s going to say next but pray she doesn’t. Those words will just make you even more upset. It’s already enough you have that constant reminder in your head. 

You watch her fiddle with the rings on her index and pinky fingers. “ But you know… you haven’t been the same since you and Jimi-”

“ Don’t fucking say it. I don’t want to hear it.”

She sighs harshly and stands up, “ Im just worried about you Yn”

“ Don’t be. Im fine. “ That lie escaped your tongue way too easily. 

Truthfully you haven’t and won’t be fine. Everyday there is something new about that girl and Jimin on twitter. Gossip pages, twitter fanpages, and online entertainment pages just always talking about them. They did this, they did that today. Oh we caught them going to this and that restaurant. That used to be you and him.. but now everyone has forgotten about you and focused on them.

Ever since you’ve told reporters and paparazzi repeatedly that you will not be holding or going to any interview they just stopped. A few calls here and there to your manager about scheduling one but she knew you didn’t want to do them so every request is denied. Although its been a year and some change, they still seem to want your side and your opinion to weigh in on. I guess that’s what happens when you date an Idol.

“ The door.. Y/N the door somebody is at the door.” Ryan says, tapping you over and over. You shake your head interrupting your thoughts for the time being. A few more knocks come through.

Finally up onto your feet you harshly walk to the door with each step making noise. It’s to early in the morning for someone to actually be knocking at the door right now. Whoever it is better be dropping off some sort of package, or they’ll surely get a piece of your mind.

Your frail hands grab onto the doorknob and swing it open. Your eyes almost pop through your sockets. How? How did he know you were here? You certainly did not tell him your knew address.

There he stands, his tall frame looking down on you. Lips formed into a tiny pout along with his eyebrows scrunched slightly. His brown eyes forming an ungodly stare into yours with his specs on.

“ Yn! Do you know how worried I was about you? Why did you not answer my messa-”

“Jungkook how do you know where I live?” You pace your hands on your hips, raising an eyebrow at him. To your knowledge, you never gave Jungkook your new apartment address.

Jungkook swallows slowly and puts on his best innocent face on. Oh please like that would work in this moment right now. The only person who has this address is Ryan because she’s the one who helped you move. Even if you had the choice of not giving it out to Ryan you would of but you couldn’t do that to her. She would of been so upset.

Ryan’s voice blares in the background full of excitement. Here we fucking go. “Jungkook! Come in Come in.”

“ Ryan says I could come in.” He says quickly, brushing past you and removing his shoes.

You heavily sigh and slam the door shut. What is this a family reunion? On your way back to the couch you notice them laughing and giggling like two five year old children. They don’t even notice you when you sit right across from them.

You study their expressions. Their chemistry is something so strong. The way their eyes light up when they meet, the way that Jungkook smiles and scrunches his nose more often when she’s around. You miss that. You miss doing that.

“ So are you both coming along this afternoon?”

Your attention focuses back on them. Of course you weren’t paying attention once again.

Your eyes slowly meet with theirs, “ Huh? Where are we going?”

“ Kookie finally bought a house! He wants us to come tonight for chicken and beer. You’re coming right?”

A sharp pain goes through your heart. If the both you you guys go then theirs a possibility that Jimin was invited too. After all, that is his brother. If Jimin comes then he’s most likely going to bring Isabel. A recipe for disaster. Your poor heart, that most likely could not bare the sight of them infront of you, would shatter into a million pieces.

Jungkook’s expression is ready to burst into happiness or to turn into a pout awaiting for your answer. If you let him down he’ll surely be mad at you. But putting yourself before him this time would be the right thing to do right?

“ Listen Jungkook I.. don’t think I can go.” You start off, playing with your hair with your head down.

“ I’ll space you two apart.”

Your face automatically lifts itself up in shock. Somehow, that little confirmation of Jimin being there, gave you some hope. Hope for what though?

 “ Wha-what do you mean?”

Jungkook sighs heavily with his hand going up to his brown hair running it through lightly. “ I’ll make sure you two are distanced apart. You don’t want to come because of Jimin but I’ll make sure I’ll invite more people to keep you company and away from him. Okay?”

“ Please Yn. I’ll be there too.” Ryan begs, laying her head on Jungkook’s shoulder. Jungkook smiles a little, caressing her cheek with his other hand upon waiting your response.

Weird. When did they get so close?

The first thing you want to say is that you really could not go. But they already know the excuse now. You might as well just give in.

‘‘ Fine. What time tonight? “

Skincare and makeup products are scattered everywhere on your vanity. You needed the perfect look for tonight that says ‘Yes im doing fine without you’, but in reality you’re doing worse. This is the night where you’ll actually see him. Damn it’s been a while.

After you apply your highlight you step back and take a look at yourself. Not bad at all. You smile to yourself and start cleaning up the mess of products you had  distributed across the vanity. A new text appears on you phone as soon as you gather everything up and put it back in it’s place. Grabbing your phone, it’s Ryan giving you the address to Jungkook’s new house.

You sigh and mentally prepare yourself, ‘‘ Okay Yn. You can do this. It’s just one night of conversing among people. Who knows, maybe you’ll meet someone new.”

Before heading out you grab your coat and scarf. Clara follows you all the way to the door letting out her little meows once again. You bend down to pet her head lightly with a smile. “ Clara im coming back. I’ve put food in your bowl babygirl.”

She purrs under your touch then walks away to settle herself in her bed. You take one last final look at your decent sized apartment before heading out.

The subway ride was agonizing pain for you due to it being 30 minutes long. Well, at-least you can ride the subway now. Your mind wouldn’t even of thought of that when you were with him. Everybody would have noticed you and bombard you with questions.

The outskirts of Seoul is peaceful and quite. Not many people live over here. Mostly famous actors and idols. The taxi takes a few minutes to get to the fairly clean subway station. Once you’re inside you take a good look at the driver who seems to be eyeing you in suspicion. You pull out your phone and read the words to the address exactly to him. The taxi man pulls of into the empty streets of god knows where.

All it took was a ten minute ride and then you’re there. The taxi man pulls up to a security guard booth. Just beyond the gates is more street but  by squinting your eyes you can make out just a few newly built houses.

‘‘ Who are you here to see?” The taxi driver says.

“ Jeon Jungkook.?

The driver talks to the man for a few seconds before you see the security guard pick up a phone and start dialing. The security is extremely uptight, thats good. After a few moments of speaking the security guard finally opens the gates to be let through.

As you pull up to the house you’re automatically mesmerized on how big and beautiful it is. There’s fresh bushes and some white roses growing in the front of it complementing the white modern style home. The roundabout is full of luxurious cars, in which might be all the other guests.

‘‘ 10 dollars’‘ He says. You give him the ten, thank him, and grab your purse, closing the door behind you.

Your eyes meet face to face with the expensive house. Behind you is the tire wheels backing up and running off back down the roundabout. The time on your watch reads 8:15. Only fifteen minutes late, not bad right?

With each step you take fear quivers inside of you. What if he opens the door? What if that girl opens it instead? The wind blows harsh-fully hitting your cheeks making them turn slightly colored. You raise a small, shaky fist to knock on the door. Your blood turning cold, and face turning pale already. Your anxiety already taking its place inside of your body.

The door swings open revealing Ryan smiling from ear to ear. She pulls you inside without even a greeting. You kick your shoes off in a hurry as she pulls you more and more inside. Scanning the area around you, its a nice huge place. First the both of you pass the entrance, then the chef sized kitchen, which then leads you to the spacious living room where everybody seems to be sitting.

All eyes are on you now with some familiar faces and some not. They smile and greet you one by one and you slightly bow your head with a fake smile.

‘‘ Ah Yn, nice to see you again huh.’‘ Hoseok, the smiley one says, getting up from his seat to greet you once more.

‘‘ Nice to see you to Hoseok. Is Chae-Yeon here? I’ve baked the cookies she likes.’’  You say, holding up the big tuba-wear of freshly baked cookies. Nobody can resist those.

‘‘ No she had to work sadly, but I will enjoy them for her.’‘ He chuckles, bringing the tuba-wear out of your dainty, cold hands.

A very familiar voice booms from behind you causing you to turn around. “ Yn! You actually did come!’’ Jungkook, the owner of the voice exclaims. He wipes his hands with a napkin just before pulling you into a hug.You pat his back just before letting go.

Ryan smiles and shakes her head, “ I told you she would come.’’

Only one hour and 30 minutes into the festivities and half of the people here are drunk or nearly there. You on the other hand do not drink at all. Staying sober throughout this whole party is a must. Who knows what would happen if you start drinking and saying things.Ryan seems to be doing good with Jungkook who’s laying on the floor laughing and cracking jokes with her head laying on his stomach giggling along with him. The others have casually invited themselves into the guest game-room to play some pool.

You just sit there on the couch, munching on a cookie and smiling and laughing here and there at one of Seokjin and Jungkook’s back-to-back jokes that seem to never leave the air.

Only for a knock on the door to interrupt  their flow of jokes.

‘‘ I got it I got it.” Seokjin stammers, placing a beer bottle down and stumbling towards the door. You freeze, face turning pale once more. It’s them. It could be them. Your teeth find their way to your lips and you begin to chew on it excessively.

Ryan notices it and automatically gets up from Jungkook, ‘‘ Come Yn, lets go see if the game of pool is interesting.’‘

You nod your head slightly as you get up from the couch. What are you worrying for? You look extravagant tonight. No need to worry yourself.

Just before taking your first few steps you stop, that voice. That oh so familiar voice begins to inch closer and closer. The famous laugh that he always tries to stifle by putting his hand over his mouth, that you’ve always thought was so fucking cute, fills the air.

You don’t know what got over you, but you sit back down dragging Ryan down with you. “ Yn? What are you doing I thought you wanted to avoid him.’’

‘’ No it’s okay. Im going to be fine.’‘ You say, awaiting upon his arrival into the room.

The footsteps are haunting you with each step they take.

one..two..three..four..five..si-

‘‘ Everyone, Isabel and Jimin are here.’‘ Seokjin stammers, smiling wide clearly drunk from all the beer consumed.

Your eyes go directly towards his. The pit of your stomach flutters with nervousness as you hold the long stare with him. His facial expression shocked but not showing it at all. His partner, who’s arm is linked with his, smiles brightly at everyone bowing her head slightly to them including you.

‘‘ Sorry we are late. Jimin didn’t want to come out of his home studio but I’ve made him come along with me.’‘ Her voice gentle and soft.

‘‘ Yn I forgot let me show you my new painting i have received.” Jungkook says quickly, trying to escape you from the awkwardness.You can bare it though its not as bad as you thought.

‘‘ Maybe later Kookie. I’m going to grab some juice.”  You say, getting up from your spot. You brush past Jimin lightly with Ryan tailing along with you.

The spacious kitchen was perfect for you to escape for just a moment. Silence is golden. Ryan sighs, pouring you and her a glass of juice. Nothing is to be said yet. But you know she really wants to have her input.

Raising the glass to your lips, you take a sip letting the tanginess run across your tongue and down your throat. ‘’ Say it Ryan.’’

She puts her cup down and looks at you with your eyebrows furrowed, ‘’ You aren’t fine. Please just avoid them for the night.’’

You knew it was coming but you have to face the fact that they area couple anyways so why avoid it? Maybe your mind will finally accept it to see it in person.

‘‘ I have to face it one way or another so why not now?’‘

She shakes her head in disapproval, finishing the rest of her juice. “ No you don’t. You’re making yourself suffer and I don’t like it.’’

‘‘ Yn.. did you make these cookies?’‘ A voice says behind you. Ryan’s eyes go wide and then looks at you signaling for you to not turn around. But you do it anyways.

Isabel. How dare she call you by a pet name? You don’t even know her like that and she’s doing this. Anger wants to get the best of you but you remain humble and calm.

‘‘ Yes. Is there a problem though? Are they not good?’‘ You say, putting on your best innocent act.

She smiles as she moves a piece of hair of her perfectly framed face, ‘’ No they are great! I was wondering if i can have the recipe.. for Jimin’s purpose of course.’’

You breathe through your nostrils with your eyes closed. She knows what she’s doing. She likes seeing you suffer huh? ‘’ You can follow any recipe online. I just add almond extract and substitute white sugar for brown.’’

Ryan shakes her head slightly while sticking her cup into the sink. ‘’ I’m going to be back I have to use the restroom.’’

Once she leaves Isabel’s smile drops.’’ Almond? Im- Im allergic!” She says, semi yelling at you. You’re shocked more or so at the sudden outburst that you can’t speak. You had zero knowledge of her being allergic, it’s an accident for sure.

 “You did this on purpose!’’ She says, tears filling her eyes as she goes into a coughing fit.

Shit. You didn’t know if anyone was allergic to nuts here but you had put it in anyways because that was the secret ingredient

‘’ I- I didn’t know im sorry is there anything I can do?’’ You say, guilt taking over you while you rush to her side patting her back. 

‘‘ Get off of me! You did this on purpose! You never liked me anyways. Jimin! Jimin!‘ She scream’s, coughing and wheezing making her face red.

Multiple footsteps rush into the kitchen. You don’t know what to do at this point so you just back away and let whoever take over. All the commotion going on and yelling is starting to give you a slight headache. All of the boys surround her, bombarding with questions and asking each other what to do. 

‘‘ What’s all the yelling about? What happened! “ Jungkook exclaims rushing towards her hunched over body.

‘‘ What’s going on? “ That voice that haunts you everynight finally comes inside the kitchen. When he see’s Isabel he automatically rushes towards her side. It pains you to see him rush to another woman’s body. But that figure is no longer yours so he has every right to do that.

‘‘ She-She put almond in the cookies on purpose! She’s trying to–to-’‘ She manages to wheeze out before another coughing fit.

Jimin’s eyes meet yours full of rage but then taken over by concern. He knows your hurt. Still hurt from the past and from this very situation now. You don’t manage to keep eye contact, so the floor is your eyes’ bestfriend right now.

‘‘ Yn. is this true? Why would you do that?”  He says, eyes never leaving yours and voice soft.

You shake your head quickly, “ I didn’t know she was allergic. I always put almond extract an-’’

“ You knew better than to put any type or form of nut in a dish when bringing it to ones house. You never know if someone has an allergy to it.’‘ Jungkook scolds you, eyes furrowed in shame.

‘‘ Don’t blame her. She didn’t fucking know.” Ryan’s voice enters the room in madness. She comes to your side with her arms crossed. Your own personal savior. Without her, you’d still be feeling guilty and taking the blame.

‘‘ Besides, you knew better than to invite him if you knew he was going to bring the girl he cheated on her with.. right?’‘ She says, cocking her head to the side as her attitude takes over.

The room is silent again. Good girl Ryan. 

Isabel lifts her head in disbelief along with Jimin. “ Listen that’s beside the point. Just don’t do it again.” Jimin says, focusing his attention back on Isabel. He reaches into her purse to grab her Epi-pen.

His scolding is enough to send your eyes into tears. You shouldn’t of agreed to come. This is a disaster. You take the tuba-wear of cookies from the counter on your way out of the kitchen and dispose of them. Your vision is blurry and you don’t know where your going but you just need some air. You make lefts and rights down long and short hallways till you reach a room that has a balcony.

You slip on who-ever’s house slippers and open the sliding door revealing the winter’s cold harsh air. You lean on the railing and close your eyes breathe in and out heavily.

Wiping the tears away, You open our eyes and look straight ahead. The whole city is lit up such a beautiful view for a sad moment. The sad moment is cut short by the sliding door opening and closing. You don’t bother to turn around it’s probably just Ryan checking on you again. When are people going to stop doing that?

“ Yn.”

Thats the last voice you wanted to hear.

‘‘ Are you happy? Happy for scolding me infront of everybody.”  You sniffle, wiping away your leaking nose.

You hear some rustling before something is placed on your shoulders. You look down at the material and shrug it off of you.

‘‘ Give it to your girlfriend.”

‘‘ I can’t let you be cold. Put it back on.’‘ He sighs, picking it back up and coming closer to you. You both stand side by side. Jimin puts his jacket around you once more and before you could re-do your action just before, he speaks.

‘‘ Shrug it off again and I’ll scold you. Do you understand?’‘ He says firmly.

You don’t bother to speak. Silence is golden.

‘‘ Listen.. i know you still aren’t over the fact that we are through but-”

‘‘ Shut up. I don’t want to hear it. Please go tend to your dying girlfriend.’‘ You say, sarcastically.

He huffs, “ She’s resting right now. She wouldn’t have to be if you wouldn’t of put-’’

You turn towards him slowly and meet his eyes daring for him to finish the rest of his sentence. ‘’ Don’t you fucking dare Park Jimin.’’

‘‘ Honorifics.’‘ He says, slightly looking down at you due to the height difference.

‘‘ You’re right Jimin-ssi.’‘

Jimin’s expression is taken a-back. You knew that one honorific word would hurt him.

‘‘ If we are done speaking I will take my leave now.” You say, eyes never leaving his as you take off his jacket and toss it to him, leaving him outside in the cold

This night was one of your worst mistakes. You thought you could handle it, but couldn’t. So maybe Ryan and Jungkook were right. Maybe you can’t handle it at all..