#those are my essentials
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does anyone know how to stop the body from keeping score? i have shit to do
#i have shit to do but i'm so bad at both going to sleep and staying asleep that it's been fucking up my life for years at this point#yes this about accidentally sleeping through class this morning but in my defense i had an atomic tummy moment at like 6 am :( which is#kind of my point? an reason for missing sleep shouldn't stop me from participating in my own life and i'm tired of rationing my waking hours#if sleep was optional i would be unstoppable essentially but alas. alack even. specifically a lack of sleep.#girl all the saints have it out for me today for skipping church on a holy day of obligation i guess. well fuck those guys.#a post
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"dude its not that embarassing to rewatch some creepypasta stuff you liked as a teenager" the character i imprinted on like a baby duck at 16 was a demon from new jersey that acts like the humanization of every offspring song and canonically listens to scissor sisters. His favorite color is purple and his favorite pokemon are gengar and haunter. He leaves people notes with emojis on them. He acts like a beetlejuice scare actor at halloween horror nights. His catchphrase is "feeling sassy?" Hes (allegedly) worked with every war criminal throughout history and been every serial killer. even the gay ones. He ate a baby. His animal motif is a rabbit. Hes kind of based off the donnie darko rabbit. He almost exclusively wears merchandise of the quentin tarantino movie death proof. He talks to his cats in a baby voice. He wears a white fedora that makes every video he wears it in feel dated by like 7 years. Hes 5'3. Sometimes he barks like a dog. Hes from new jersey. He hacked a girls tumblr blog so he could post about how awesome he is. He added a laugh track over a video of him killing people. He named a chainsaw rex. He torments people by playing frank sinatra at them. His name comes from an animal collective song. His creator drew his "true form" as a giant buff wolf bug anthro. Theres a (semi)canon blog entry where he makes the speakers blare rob zombie before he enters a room, then holds a guy at gunpoint to describe what he did to to him while "making sure to leave in all the cool parts". The guy hes possessing has radioactive blood. He tried for 2 whole minutes to pick up a bottle of ketchup with a grabby hand. Hes kind of suicidal.He can be reasonably compared to pretty much every major tumblr sexyman. His actor has gone on record saying heath ledgers joker inspired his acting choices. His creators were too attached to him to permanently kill him at the end of the series. Sometimes his voice gets distorted and it makes him sound like bill ciphers first year on HRT. Hes basically like my artistic muse. For some fucking reason i associate the song cake by the ocean with him. I firmly believe that if everymanhybrid didn't require a masters degree in creepypasta autism to comprehend, he would've caused more teenage stabbings than the slenderman incident and more kin war tumblr scenarios than nagito komaeda.
#slenderverse#everymanhybrid#emh#speakeasies#emh habit#habit everymanhybrid#habit emh#and the problem is that every new fan of the series is like#teenagers who like columbine#so i cant even make friends in those circles#because im fucking 24#like im almost ten years older than some of u omfg???#so#he IS that embarassing and thank GOD emh is niche#okay so#he is embarassing but emh is not embarassing it is not cringe its oomf#emh is genuinley one of the coolest found footage diy low budget horrors ive ever seen#genuinely would love to make found footage bc of the impact it had on me#anyway i really did imprint on him like a babyduck#i was a baby trans guy that didnt know it yet rewatching the :D video with absolutely nobody to talk about it with#like huh hope that doesn't affect me in the future :)#it did#spoiler 17 yo me thats why you watched :D three times in secret#it's not because you're trans. It's because you're a sicko#Despite it all hes essentially my artistic muse.
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the thing about bad buddy is that calling it enemies to lovers is not entirely wrong and is a very succinct and easy way to indicate the general plot, but also one of the only moments that the two main characters are actually personally in conflict with each other lasts about four minutes and is expressed mainly through upset shirtless xylophone playing contrasted with a montage of happy moments that features a time there was triumphant shirt-wearing xylophone playing. and then they both say sorry at literally the exact same time
#which as it turns out is EXACTLY how i want my enemies to lovers plots by the way. there is literally no way to beat this#if anything it's. enemies (through circumstance. unwillingly) to lovers (by choice. enthusiastically)#*#bad buddy#bad buddy the series#edit. actually ALSO worth noting that even this brief xylophone-expressed conflict only happens because of their differing views#on how to deal with outside influences on their relationship. which is doing just fine except for those pressures from around them#and then it's RESOLVED by pran going yeah i worry about people finding out but i care about you more#essentially already stating the whole final we can't change the world but that doesn't mean we have to let the world change us thing#and fjdkfj. yeah i'll stop adding tags now. ridiculous how wildly rewatchable a show is that at first glance seems so low on plot
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Gold is often connected to divinity in rl religions. In Buddhism, it indeed symbolizes enlightenment and such, and it is often kept pure in order to not ruin its brilliance. In Tibetan Buddhism, statues are gilded with it and the 5 tonne Golden Buddha statue in Thailand is composed of 18 karat gold, almost fully pure.
Within this world, I like to think that gold has caught the eye of the Anemons in a religious sense upon the (,,re/")discovery of the Void Sea. The golden waves of it shaped the perception of their world, from explaining the sun as coated in a layer of Void, to giving an idea of what "cleanliness of soul" should look like. Wheel Flowers are also attributed to the Void as sprouts of it, because of their ethereal gold coloration.
The feeling of the divine has however faded when the motivations behind handling of the Void went terribly south, replaced by the extremist corruption and greed of High castes.
In other words, I wanted an excuse to draw Euros as a šarkan/змей.
#rw#rain world#oc tag#rw ancients#looks to the moon#five pebbles#no significant harassment#oc: fish inside a birdcage#oc: abet zephyr#oc: boreas' blessing#oc: preacher#oc: three sparrows#oc: caper of euros#philosophy sessions au#my art#lilypad implied#since I'm considering Iterators more closely lately. defining what ''relationship'' even is is so ough..#the masks are essentially the same as those Tibetan statues. gilded. and golden leaf Is pure gold. 'Row says That cuz she's stupid-#-from religion stuff. doing my best to make her an unreliable narrator for things outside of her expertise.
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You wanna hear a good story? Listen to this one.
Mobius + comfort
#owen wilson#mobius#mcuedit#lokiedit#marveledit#loki#marvel#owenwilsonedit#dianagifs#CHARACTER OF ALL TIME FOREVER BELOVED#thank god this is my own post and i'm not about to write a tag essay under some pour soul's set bc here we go lmao#imagine MAKING comfort at a place like the tva!!#where we know what happened when he hesitated#and also explains the general antagonistic attitude towards him by most of the other hunters in s1 bc why would they respect him afterwards#but he never stops believing things will get better because if he can change so can anyone else#when d-90 essentially apologizes for KILLING him how could mobius do anything but offer forgiveness#when he himself had followed the guise of those same orders to kill and understands what it feels like to realize that#for all the reassurance and support he gives everyone else the most he ever allowed himself was a dream#which led to the same rapt attention and focus from a god no less in order to finally be seen for the first time and appreciated bc of it#then as always owen showed this in a million ways from microexpressions to line delivery so guess i'll just yell about it for eternity#(or at least some more in my mind since tumblr is cutting this off in search unless i trim the tags but y'all feel me ✌️😅)
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mmj WoF au desings+ doodles
#I didn't dump lore the last time (since there was close to none) buut yall can have the general vibe#three disgraced soldiers finding hope to end the war through one failgirl mudwing#so essentially the main plot but idols are dragon soldiers in a war...those concepts are pretty similar#either wxs or niigos next#art#my art#project sekai#doodle#mmj#more more jump#minori hanasato#haruka kiritani#airi momoi#shizuku hinomori#shizuairi#minoharu#wings of fire#wof#wof art#prsk wof au
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FAMINE: That's one deep, dark nothing you've got there, Dean.
[youtube with closed captions]
dean and his father. dean and his family. dean and how bad it is.
(via @closetoyou1970)
#spn#vid#mind the warnings on this one for real#woe! fruit of my rewatch be upon ye.#pallas calls this my 'deangirl coming out vid' which honestly. true. but those who paid attention know i've always been a deangirl.#also. after this no more deanwinchester rilo kiley amvs I Pwomise#anyway. i'm not gonna give a full commentary here but a big reason why i chose this song is that the narrator#is essentially dismissing her own problems and instead watching the problems of someone else#and i kind of wanted to play with that theme. this is the parallels show so let's do some parallels. lots of things happen to characters#that are Like Dean somehow. either in personality or circumstance. that we know or can infer happen to him. but we don't see it bc it's#not sayable. not speakable. so like for an easy one. we see meg being tortured in caged heat. she also talks about apprenticing under#alastair just like dean. so i show her being tortured [in a way that is sexualized and demon-specific] and reacting how she does#because i invite the audience to imagine or interpret that this has also happened to dean at some point. we just don't see it#so there are many dean parallels in this video. some obvious. some subtle but textual. some products of my twisted mind. but that's the way#i am using them to make my argument.#oh also: dean voice sam's eyes going black is JUST like when he used to fight with dad and wouldn't listen to me when i told him not to.#i guess also the point is that because it's unsayable. dean can't say it. dean can't even acknowledge it. and so it bleeds through#into everything in his life#that's why it's important that the song narrator doesn't take her own problems seriously. dean doesn't either.
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I want so desperately to finish this one, but life has other plans for me this month. I learned a ton while working on it, so fingers crossed I can pick the momentum back up in the future
sakura, from my fic series the slug & the stars
#haruno sakura#madasaku#naruto#my art#to those interested: my (estranged) father is in the hospital and he has essentially no one else to take charge of things while hes there#if you've been following me for a bit you may know that my mom and a grandmother are also both very ill. they're doing better but it's still#i also work full time on top of it all and its the busiest time of year for my field too#anyways ive spent my spare time reading a fuckkkk ton and when inspiration strikes its been easier to write#painting is still super tricky for me and it requires this intense focus that just leaves me so drained afterwards#and i also pay less attention to my posture when im painting and i get so sore lmao 30 has been wild so far#all of that to say. uhhhh ill hopefully spend more of my free time in the next few weeks writing instead of reading and painting
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Trying to listen to podcast to calm down to sleep -> loud as fuck ad. Trying to check something quick from a youtube tutorial -> first gotta watch 2x 30 second unskippable ads. Trying to go to a website -> 2 popups and an ad video automatically start to play. Trying to listen to the radio while driving -> 7 minutes of uninterrupted ad time. Every single free app with those shitty game ads with the stupid annoying ass king. I’m tired !!! I never wanna buy anything ever again !!!!!!!
#watched youtube and skipped the ’’this video is sponsores by’’ only to get hit with 2 30sec unskippable ads and I just deleted the youtube#app from my phone with pure rage I’m fucking tired of ads everywhere all the good goddamn time#nYx PLuMpIng GLoss pLumP yOurSeLf Up BabY go fucking die#(also im tired so im unreasonably mad at every minor thing rn but like this has been the sentiment for months)#(should’ve gone for that walk I was thinking abt would’ve been much calmer)#(bc now rage deleted all the ''fun''' apps from my phone it's now just the essentials in there (tho did keep podcasts & Spotify bc those I#refuse to give up) like idk this better stick I want phone screen time of 1-2h per day)#april 2024#2024
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the other side of this is when you see a theory post from someone who hasn't seen nmt thats actually literally 1000% true and i get mad that my brain has never been that big
i feel so cringe i dont wanna be Um Actually but i keep seeing hatchetfield theories where i come to the same conclusion of Well this just isnt true cause in nightmare time Then i remember most of the ppl in the tags probably dont watch nmt and just watch the musicals and i sound like a fucking nerd
#its like ur messing with me ur pretending you could not have guessed that#it is kinda funny to watch peple speculate what tinky meant by 'the whole set' they have no idea the weight of the lore they r missing there#also when people are like wait what is wiggly is webby's sibling :0:0:0:0 like ur hatchetheart is NOT broken until u watch yellow jacket#and also like i don't wanna spoil nmt for them 😭 i want them to watch it themselves#honestly though... apeman is a hard skip im so sorry i could never get into it#im not a big witch in the web fan either but i love lore so it gets a pass#idk if i even wanna rewatch forever and always tbh i only like it for the paulkins#but watcherworld and time bastard are such essentials to the hatchetfield series like they gotta watch them#it would be fun if they made a better recorded version i think a lot more ppl would dip their toes into s1#im sitting here like which story am i missing from s1 i completely blocked out janes a car#the song? 1000/10. the episode? 6.9/10#tom is a freak but also i can't believe he didn't fuck the tailpipe or the gashole bs those seem much more sexy than a cupholder#honey queen and yellow jacket are literally like fucking movies#and i care about abstinence camp sooo much it was what made me so hype for npmd#cuz nick kepst saying if u liked abstinence camp youll love npmd!! and he was so fucking right and i always knew it#anways watch nmt#watcherworld time bastard honey queen daddy and yellow jacket#those are my essentials#sorry about the massive wall of tags LMFAO
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how would dean even have TIME for d*stiel…. he’s completely booked and busy making his entire life and being about sam
#like i’m just baffled#he’s got no brain space left for anyone or anything else…#he’s essentially just one of those seagulls in finding nemo that only go mine mine mine mine but it’s just sam sam sam sam sam#anti destiel#wincest#my post#samdean#lighthearted
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"this was supposed to be a warm-up" drawing of my V Rising-sona. I called her Moonlight to go with naf's Sunset. it's a fun game!!! 🦇
#beedalee art#vrising#vampires#vampire#vampire oc#I've been obsessed since the beta#my first playthrough i was all about chaos and lightning magic#in round 2 i was really into unholy magic (bones bones bones)#and now i'm loving illusion magic!!! aaaa#and don't get me started on castle building ok#TW for those interested:#the vampire you play is essentially evil#so there is a prisoner aspect#you can capture people for blood and to have as servants#so def keep that in mind if you play!
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Leverage 4x1 - "The Long Way Down Job"
#christian kane#leverage#eliot spencer#parker#beth riesgraf#the long way down job#this scene is why this is one of my all-time favorite episodes#the way eliot reads parker's reactions to finding scott#now that she's found her people‚ her greatest fear is losing them and being left on her own again#i think eliot understands that about her even before parker has fully grappled with it#and parker doesn't make a request—she's declaring they're going to get scott out‚ too#and eliot COULD tell her that's dangerous and dumb and a threat to their mission (because it's all of those things)#and normally he would#but this time‚ he doesn't. he realizes how important to her and agrees‚ even if it will make everything 10 times harder#and it's only when it becomes impossible that he lets her down easy and reminds her how strong she is#why she's essential to the team#i'm not crying‚ you're crying
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★ Kirbtober 2024 Day 5: Royal ★
(ID: Kirby series fanart of Shadow Dedede, standing with a confident lean and smiling fiercely at the viewer, one hand propped cockily on his hip, the other holding his great mechanical hammer over his shoulder. Around him, red stars drip darkly. END ID.)
Previous Day | Next Day | Prompt List (made by @/paintpanic)
Started on 09/03/24, finished on 09/04/24. | Kirbtober 2023 Comp
#veins art#veins fanart#kirby series#kirby#shadow dedede#kirbtober#kirbtober 2024#day 5#royal#paintpanic#I love how this one came out#despite SD’s million-and-three tones of gray and the hell that is keeping them all shaded and separated#*shakes the Wand Tool in anger*#also y'know how I sometimes talk about putting Magolor in the microwave as a gesture of affection?#I wanna do the same to SD but as a legit threat#just... stars lookit this smug bastard. with his ship-eating grin#thinks he's better than everyone. bosses his staff around. probably pushes kids off swings and raises taxes on essentials. awful man#(... listen I’ve written him in a *very specific way* in the AU)#(so it’s probably colored my thoughts on him a little bit)#(and those thoughts are “greedy tyrant into the garbage disposal with you”)#(I blame SD's Japanese flavor text calling him “the darkness in DDD's heart” specifically)#(but hey! other interpretations are valid too tho! just like with GK)#eye contact tw#veinsfullofstars
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“You’re going to blow out your arms,” the villain observed. They watched as the hero merely grit their teeth, shoving themself through another pull-up. It looked painful, and if the sweat slicking the hero’s brow was any indication, it was.
They waited for the hero to let themself drop from the bar and accept the villain was stronger. But they didn’t.
Three more pull-ups, and the villain stepped in.
“Hero,” they said slowly. “You’re about to tear the ligaments in your arms. You need to stop.”
The hero blew out a shuddering breath. Struggled for purchase, fighting gravity—and let themself drop.
The hero’s hands were bleeding, calluses torn open by the bar. The hero didn’t seem bothered when their own hands shook so much that their blood began to splatter on the gym floor.
For a moment, the villain could only stare at them.
Shit.
They didn’t know how to handle this. They knew the hero was dedicated. They knew the hero was strong, and perpetually trying to be stronger, but they hadn’t thought…
They hadn’t thought the hero would be so willing to tear apart their own body for success.
It was supposed to be fun, the villain thought. They felt a little sick as the hero pressed their palms together to soothe the bleeding, an action that was practiced and familiar. As if they had done this before.
The hero reached for something in their bag, smearing blood on the side, and pulled out a roll of blue electrical tape. The villain didn’t understand why, until the hero tore a strip off and made to wrap their hands with it.
The hero would be the death of them.
They crouched in front of the hero, plucking the electrical tape out of their hands.
“What are you doing with this?”
The hero blinked at the villain like they were the strange one in this situation.
“Wrapping my hands?”
The villain hissed in a breath.
“With electrical tape?”
The hero flushed slightly, looking down at their bloody hands. They looked close to tears.
“It…sticks to skin, really well. And it doesn’t move, either, when you move your hands or wherever else, even if you’re fighting. Plus, blood doesn’t make it come off, at least, not for a while.”
The villain blinked at them.”
“Blood doesn’t make it come off,” the villain repeated, processing. The hero nodded, reaching for the electrical tape. The villain settled it out of reach.
“Not if you wrap it right.”
Dimly, the villain realized that meant the hero had done this enough times to have it down to a science.
“And you couldn’t use a bandaid?” The villain asked incredulously. The hero shrugged a shoulder, then winced at the motion.
Yeah, the hero had absolutely blown out their arms.
“Bandaids move—“
The villain hushed them.
“Be quiet for a second.”
The hero, wisely, went quiet.
The villain rubbed a hand over their face, then studied the hero for a moment. They took one of the hero’s hands into their own, studying the damage.
“Why did you do this to yourself,” the villain murmured.
“What do you mean, why,” the hero snapped. “It’s my job.”
“Your job is to save people,” the villain corrected. “Not destroy yourself.”
“I’m not destroying myself—“
“You are.”
“Shut up—“
“Hero.”
“I need to be better,” the hero snapped. Their voice rang out across the gym, echoing into the rafters, and they both froze. After a moment, the hero spoke again, voice soft. “I need to be better.”
They said it like they needed the villain to understand. The villain wondered who they were really saying it to—the villain, or themself.
“Better than who?”
“Everyone.” It was hushed, like a secret.
The villain watched them, waiting.
The hero took a shaky breath
“My whole thing is being the best. I have always been the best. That’s the only reason I matter. If I’m not strong enough, then I am nothing, so I need. to be. better.”
The hero had started crying, very quietly, like they were afraid to take up too much space.
The villain was not equipped to handle gifted kid burnout.
“There’s more to you than just being a good athlete,” the villain said hesitantly, and the hero shook their head.
“No. There isn’t.”
“Hero.”
“Can you give me back my electrical tape?” They hiccuped to contain a sob.
“No,” the villain said firmly, and then the hero really was sobbing.
“You don’t understand—“
The villain didn’t. Not really. They had never been the kind of talented that the hero was.
They wondered now if maybe that was a blessing.
“I don’t,” the villain agreed. “But I do understand that you’ve saved half the city, and you give everything you have to give, and you always do your best.”
“But I-“
“No.” The villain stopped them. “You are doing your best.” They tipped the hero’s chin up until they met the villain’s eyes. “And it is enough.”
The hero froze, eyes darting over the villain’s face. They wondered if anyone had ever said that to the hero, if whatever mentor they had was giving them anything other than orders to be stronger. Be better. Be more.
The villain had some new targets to take care of, it would seem.
For now, though, they had to take care of hero.
“We’re going to go wrap your hands,” they said softly. “And then we’re going to take care of your arms, and you’re going to take a nap.”
The hero nodded, watching them like they were some kind of good, selfless person.
“And if I ever catch you using electrical tape again, so help me, I will put you six feet under.”
That startled a laugh out of the hero, and they let the villain guide them to their feet.
“Fine.”
The villain turned to them. “Okay?”
Are you going to be alright?
The hero seemed to understand.
“Okay,” the hero agreed.
Yes.
And so, it was.
#writing#writing community#snippet#angst#heroes and villains#ficlet#writblr#hero/villain#hero whumpee#exhaustion#overworked#villain caretaker#whump#kind of#in case you’re wondering. yes you CAN do this to yourself. it’s completely possible#essentially what happens is if you do a motion (a pull-up) more than your body is capable#it gets mad. this is different from training till failure. this is to failure and then beyond#so while you started using the correct muscle groups you those muscles get tired and despite the tired you don’t stop#so then your body switches to muscles it SHOULDNT BE USINF and then you fuck up your elbows (in the case of pull-ups)#and then you can’t straighten your arms for a week bc the ligaments and tendons and all the little movement parts want to keep it curled in#I’m not a doctor#I’m just a gifted kid who was an athlete who got burnt out and destroyed her body lmao#this is possibly maybe based on true events that occurred#anyways. I’m not a doctor but you can use electrical tape on wounds. yes it sticks. yes it stays. it’s honestly very useful.#electrical tape > bandaids#do not do anything listed here it is BAD. do not blow out your muscles it hurts. properly clean ur injuries. I beg you.#don’t get injured at all#thank you to my friend who went “pull-up’ competition and then watched me create this angst#love u besties. drink water. go to sleep. summon demons. ❤️ self care
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various halloween chibis i've done for my wife. >:3 glenn (and offscreen miklan) + dimitri and felix!
#fe16#fe3h#fire emblem three houses#fire emblem#glenn fraldarius#dimitri alexandre blaiddyd#felix hugo fraldarius#fraldarddyd#dmlx#throwing those there even though it's subtext jic for the people who wanna blacklist it fhsuedhushgv#(miklan is offended bc he is an ACTUAL vampire and glenn is essentially making fun of him. this is a vtm setting dw abt it#my art#commissions#emm don't look#blood#it's fake blood but jic
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