#those are his eyes……… and they're lovely…… compound eyes………

[twooftheluckyones]

How The One Who Waits Stole Christmas

Everyone up above sure liked Christmas a lot… But Narinder, Who was chained down below, Did NOT! Narinder hated Christmas! The whole Christmas season! Now, please don't ask why. No one quite knows the reason. It could be his third eye wasn't set in just right. It could be, perhaps, that his chains were too tight. But I think that the most likely reason of all, May have been that his heart was dead, shriveled and small. Whatever the reason, His heart or his chains, He stood there on Christmas Eve, feeling disdain, Staring through the red crown, hissing whispered insults At the warm burning bonfires above in his cult. He knew every beast in Old Faith lands above, Was busy now, spreading their kindness and love, "And they're slacking on duties!" he snarled with a sneer, "Tomorrow is Christmas! It's practically here!" Then he growled, with his bone fingers nervously drumming, "I MUST find some way to stop Christmas from coming!" For Tomorrow, he knew, all mortal girls and boys, Would wake bright and early. They'd rush for their toys! And then! Oh, the noise! Oh, the Noise! Noise! Noise! Noise! That's one thing he hated! The NOISE! NOISE! NOISE! NOISE! Then the cult, young and old, would sit down to a feast. And they'd feast! And they'd feast! And they'd FEAST! FEAST! FEAST! FEAST! They would feast on pumpkin stew, and follower flesh. Which was something Narinder couldn't stand, even fresh! And THEN They'd do something He liked least of all! Every whelp in the compound, the tall and the small, Would stand close together, with rhythmic drums beating. They'd stand hand-in-hand. And the Lamb would start bleating!They'd bleat! And they'd bleat! And they'd BLEAT! BLEAT! BLEAT! BLEAT! And the more Nari thought of those ear piercing bleats, The more that he thought, "This should be no feat" "Why, for three centuries I've put up with it now!" "This ritual can be extinguished, But HOW?" Then he got an idea! An awful idea! NARINDER GOT A WONDERFUL, AWFUL IDEA! "I know just what to do!" The cat laughed in his throat. And he made a quick Santy Claus hat and a coat. And he chuckled, and clucked, "What a great godly trick!" "With this coat and this hat, they’ll look just like Saint Nick!" "All I need is my vessel." The god looked around. But, since they had not died, they were not to be found. Did that stop Narinder? No! The cat simply said, "If they won’t come to me, I will grab them instead!" So he reached through a portal with his boney black hand, And pulled the Lamb out, just like he had planned.

In a flash they were dressed in their new Santa Fleece And fed their new doctrine against Christmas peace Then Narinder said, "GET OUT!" And he threw them right back, To the land of the living, with the plan of attack. Remove all the toys, the trees and the leisure So their god could watch over with quiet and pleasure Pleasing him was a thing that they so deeply treasured "This is stop number one," through the red crown he hissed, Pointing toward the small hut of a brand new cultist They walked in the hovel with reckless abandon Soon, there was no decor left up or left standin The red crown grew fat as they tossed presents in It was not a big fan, as it much preferred sin Lamb stuck to their task, as their master commands For, perhaps if they do this, they can maybe hold hands They gathered up things from shelter to shelter Heart burning with passion like a hot iron smelter Statues! Cookies! Holly and bells! Every last item made the greedy crown swell. By the look of things, Narinder could tell, The god’s plan was going incredibly well Lamb looted their food stores, tossing all they amassed For the cat god had called for a cult-wide week fast In the last little tent and the edge of the clearing While completing their task, the Lamb caught someone peering The follower yawned and their leader just knew It’s snoring poet, Thorjol, that liked to eat poo "Leader, I awoke when I heard something scoot May I ask why you’re wearing a Santa Claus suit?" Lamb had been caught, but patted his head Softly said, “BAAA,” then stabbed him til dead. They had already planned to get rid of this clown But the sacrifice ritual had been on cool down It was quarter past dawn… All the beasts, still a-bed, All the beasts, still asnooze, and the Lamb bowed their head Their crusade on Christmas went smooth as could be Now to dump all that garbage right into the sea Breaking a sweat, the wooled one rolled the crown All bloated and heavy, leaving a trench in the ground They soon reached the beach, down the sand like a comet When the crown hit the water, it started to vomit Little by little, it shrunk down to size With a noticeable watering under its eye Every last present sunk down to the depths But the Lamb beamed quite widely, no single tear wept They had done a good job, and they had just a hunch That their big hunky cat god was just pleased as punch It felt like that little lamb could do no wrong And they couldn’t help but break out into song They bleated and baa’d and bleated some more To an old sheepy folk song right there on the shore So loud and so proud, why it was such a show That it traveled down to the One Chained Below He gritted his teeth and plugged up his ears This whole thing confirmed his greatest of fears Christmas can be destroyed and reduced down to scrap But that goddamn Lamb will NOT shut their yap

[front-facing-pokemon]

[positivelyqueer]

[VD: close up video giant millipede eating cucumber slice. Small mites crawl on the millipede. /end VD]

🥒

[buckyalpine]

Imagine the fluff of Bucky retiring from the avengers because he met you, the sweetest thing on the planet, the woman he's down on one knee for ready to marry in a heart beat. He's built a house from the ground up, a quite place for your little growing family because not long after the wedding, he has a baby boy on the way. It’s all perfect.

The absolute angst of him losing you when complications arise during the delivery and the doctors and nurses chase him out, not giving him a chance to hold you and comfort you. The last thing he sees is your labored breaths and dropping pulse.

He hears the cries of his son moments later but his happiness is short lived when the med bay is forced into an emergency evacuation because of an attack on the compound. He sees a blur of doctors rushing you to a different wing and in the midst of the chaos, his new born baby is placed into his arms. He pleads to be able to go with you but he's dragged out with no answers with the building crumbling and bursting into fire and flames behind him moments later.

He's inconsolable.

Completely distraught.

The memorial service held for you leaves Bucky in shambles, clinging onto the tiny bundle wrapped up in his arms, the only thing he has left to live for now. He doesn't want to go on without you, it's just him and his little boy in the world. He know he has to be strong for his son so he carries on as best as he can. His heart hurts when his baby boy asks for his mama.

He visits your grave often but he never truly feels peace.

There was never even a body for him to bury.

Bucky comes out of retirement when Tony calls him about a mission. He knows its serious because they wouldn't ask him to come for just anything. He doesn't want to fight again but he does it for his son; the world has to be safe for his baby.

"Daddy will be just fine" Bucky reassures his now 5 year old, pressing a kiss to his head, leaving him to stay with Sarah while he's away. When he's back at the compound, he's given a briefing on what they're up against. They leave the next morning.

-

"I've got them in the west wing, headed towards you Steve" Bucky may have been out of the field for a couple of years but his skills and training still run in his blood. He trails behind the target, gun in hand, catching a knife that's thrown his way before dodging another. He gets them cornered in an abandoned ware house, ready to end it all, justice be damned, he just wanted to get back home to his baby boy. He's about to pull the trigger but that's when he sees it.

The red skull with tentacles surrounding it.

He freezes.

He blocks a punch that comes his way, grabbing their wrist and holding them in place, shoving them against the wall. All he can see are their eyes.

Bucky knows those eyes.

No.

He rips the mask off and nearly sobs, his hands trembling as he continues to hold them with all his strength knowing it was hurting them but what choice did he have.

"Doll?"

Just a thought, okay love you, bye.

[partycatty]

i was sent an incredibly delicious prompt to use, and i just can't resist it omg. requester wanted to be anonymous, but just know i appreciate u! i won't lie, i ran into so many blocks trying to get this out. writing is hard :( i ended up taking a couple creative liberties anon i hope that's okay

bi-han > new tricks

johnny cage's girlfriend catches him cheating, so she tries to get back at him using bi-han. it's all fun and games, until something new starts to blossom.

warnings: u get cheated on, THIS IS NSFW, author struggles to write johnny in a bad light bc of their favoritism /j, accidental bottom bi-han

notes: i'm rubbing my hands together like a little fly rn, also bi-han's betrayal doesn't happen in this case, also also yes i made a gif of johnny getting his shit rocked for this fic thumbnail

masterlist <3

PART 2 !!!!

•you and johnny got together following the end of the storyline's events. he charmed you to holy hell and back with those dumb sunglasses and pickup lines at the academy. he was a sweetheart at first, love-bombing you endlessly until you accepted his thirtieth relationship proposal. deciding to stop dragging him along like a lost puppy, you finally said yes, and off you went to date a movie star!

•the change from being nobody to somebody was JARRING. suddenly, cameras were up your ass all the time, and you caught yourself staring out of your apartment window on multiple occasions to see people scurry away when they're spotted.

•even so, you can't lie. the parties that celebrities hold rival outworld's temptations. especially if johnny is hosting. despite downsizing from his mega mansion, his new home was still expansive enough to hold a large number of people. and boy did he take advantage of the space.

•everyone was a few drinks deep, you yourself were a little buzzed but with the intention of loosening up and socializing. johnny however, seems to have other intentions.

•johnny is canonically a recovering alcoholic. he'd indulge in a girly drink every now and then, maybe some whiskey on a really shitty day. but today, he must have combined the two flavors of vice and was now fitting his clothed dick into some random C-list actress's ass, grinding to the music. his sunglasses sloppily clung onto his nose and his face was flushed. drunk or not, he was dry humping some random broad at his own damn party, with you only a few feet away.

•you want to scream so bad, to tear her bleached blonde hair to the ground and beat her, and then johnny. but all you can do is stand there horrified, that is, until johnny looks up from his buried face in her neck and makes eye contact with you, eyes wide.

•"babe — goddamnit — babe!" johnny slurs out, holding your arms tight on his balcony. "it's not... fuck. it's just fun! it's a party! lighten up!"

•after a drunken back and forth, johnny eventually throws his hands in the air and tells you to fuck off because he can find better at that very party. although you heavily disagreed, the conversation abruptly ended when you slurred something back along the lines of "you want some other bitch? have 'em then!" officially ending your relationship and storming out of the party.

•the following few days were rough on your heart, and majority of the time your bed was occupied and loud sobs echoed across your walls. you could've had it all, dammit, and this dickhead just threw you away like nothing! he thinks he can just score any woman he wants, whenever he wants. even if he learned his lesson from cris, his playboy attitude runs in his veins. it's not something he's gonna shake easily, and you were a victim to his unchanging behavior.

•back to living with nothing, you decided to retreat to the one place you knew you were wanted; the lin kuei compound. bi-han, kuai liang and tomas respected your strength when it came to fighting against evil and welcomed you like their own.

•after about three days of living on the lin kuei's land, you check social media. you went ghost online after the breakup since the paparazzi and article rats were prowling the internet (and your home) for details about your breakup with the A-Lister. checking social media proved to be a stupid move, because almost instantly your feed was flooding with photos and videos of your ex-boyfriend partying on yachts and posing with models. he's really out here posting like he's not damaged in the slightest, but literally everyone and their mother can read the post a little deeper and see he's compensating for losing you. you were mature, well-spoken, and well respected, and he was still trying to get his shit together after everything that happened. you were just another crack in his shittily held together glass. and it was time to get back at him.

•it starts off innocently enough, you snap quick photos of the grandmaster when he's not looking, showing only his veiny arms and a hint of his blue uniform. you'd post it to your story to pretend to soft launch this new "boyfriend," linking a romantic song to the post and letting people run wild. this proved effective immediately, as you noticed that "UgotCAGEd" with the little verified mark would view your story almost the exact moment it'd go up. you knew that he knew exactly who was in the photo, and it just had to have been driving him up a wall. he even tried to combat this by posting more and more, each setting getting more lavish and sexy than the last. if anything, johnny was a chronic 1-upper. but you couldn't just post blurry pictures of bi-han forever. this needed to cut deep.

•and you were going to play this stupid game, because if he goes low, you go in the TRENCHES.

•"grandmaster sub-zero, i-i have a favor to ask you," you politely ask, bowing once before smiling up at bi-han. "i have a plan. a... ridiculous one. but it needs your help."

•"you want us to fake partnership?" bi-han asks you, trying to summarize your lengthy explanation. "go ask kuai liang. or tomas. they need something to do these days, with shang tsung imprisoned. i'm busy."

•"it can't be them, it has to be you," you respectfully protest, putting your hands in a prayer position to beg for his help. "johnny is... jealous of you. it would be most effective. and i'll be forever in your debt." bi-han's eyes momentarily widen at your insistence. your desperation for his help caught him a little off guard.

•it's true. johnny was jealous ever since he got his shit kicked in when they first met. they were never really huge fans of each other since then. standing in front of him now, it's easy to understand how bi-han was so superior. his emotions never took control, he was a powerful leader for his clan, and his furrowed brows and gravely voice rumbled inside of your chest... jesus, now that you're getting a good look, he's actually pretty hot. oh, no.

•"this is ridiculous," bi-han groans, trying to angle himself just right in the selfie. he stands behind you, hand wrapped around your neck as you try to angle the photo just right to where it only gives a tease of his face in the mirror's reflection. "how long does one photo take?"

•"it has to be perfect," you reply, eyes focused on your phone as you wiggle it in different directions to get the best possible view. "crouch down a little more, so more of your jawline shows."

•he leans down, and his breath fans across your neck and ear as he sighs in frustration. you can't deny the little tingle it made you feel inside. but hey, anyone would be nervous if a brick wall like bi-han was in breathing vicinity...

•you snap the photo, seemingly satisfied but now fighting a flustered expression. when you look it over, you realize no, this isn't enough. johnny would leak his own sex tape with a model to beat you at this stupid game, and while you weren't necessarily ready to start blowing the ninja, you knew you needed to get one step ahead.

•"can we take... one more?" you ask sheepishly, already trying to put into words what exactly you're going to ask from this expressionless man.

•"only if it's quick," he replies with a frown, crossing his arms.

•you take a deep breath, spinning to face him and nearly chest to chest from the tightness of the small bedroom you were given.

•pointing to your bed, bi-han almost instantly understands. his lips turn into a thin line as his cheeks are brushed with warmth, warmth that he tries to conceal from you with his hand as he rubs his face.

•he sits himself on the bed, propped up on his elbows with a knowing look in his eye. it's difficult to maintain eye contact as you crawl onto the edge of the bed, hesitant to do what you wanted. for a moment, you want to pull away and trash your entire plan. there's no way you were about to climb up and sit on a ninja grandmaster's lap as revenge against your movie star ex. how in the genuine hell did you end up in this situation??

•"come on, woman," bi-han grumbles, sitting up for a moment to abruptly wrap his hands around your hips and pulling you to sit atop his lap. you tense up, realizing you're now straddling him... and lowkey, he looks good under you. he also just manhandled you. hm. curious.

•you try to shift yourself to comfortably rest on his hips before seeming satisfied with the position. shakily, you reach up to snap a selfie, one that conceals his face but shows you sticking your tongue out and flipping the bird.

•and then you felt it.

•at first, it went unnoticed due to your nerves about the uncharacteristic closeness. but, once you settled to snap the photo, you realized that... bi-han was rock fucking hard underneath you. you weren't sure if you should acknowledge it, but regardless, it felt so perfectly sized against your clothed folds, and you make your interest unintentionally obvious when you let out a nervous whimper. bi-han's eyes remained trained onto yours with a hint of hunger in his low-lidded gaze. even though he wanted to initially hide the boner, it was now abundantly obvious and he felt a surge of confidence gauging your reaction. the hands that rested on your hips tightened, his cold fingers digging into your flesh.

•"you feel that?" he grumbles out, his body feeling suddenly incredibly hot against yours. you swallow and nod. as you do, his firm grip starts to rock your hips back and forth against his cock, the friction of the fabric dividing you two sending you wild already. "whose is bigger?"

•"...yours," you answer breathlessly, allowing yourself to be controlled by the cryomancer's hands. your confession was true, too. johnny's dick was long and lean, but bi-han's.... lord. it felt thick. even through layers of clothes it felt like it could tear you down the middle if he pounded hard enough. a new part of you wanted to find out.

•with a sudden haste, bi-han hikes up your skirt and top, holding the clothes bunched around your waist as he abruptly gives you even closer contact to his cock. you could feel it twitch and throb, and every part of you wanted to sink it into your throat to see how well it hugs your mouth's fleshy walls. his hands crawl underneath the bunched up clothes and settle on your hips, this time directly gripping the plush of them.

•a shiver shot down your spine, both with sudden arousal and the frosty trails on your body from his fingertips. even if he wouldn't admit it, he was just as excited as you were. he let out a low growl feeling your pussy leak through your panties and dampen his dick.

•"i hated the way he looked at you," he'd grumble, eyes fixated on the friction he was creating by manhandling your frame to grind against his. "wanted you all to myself — ngh —"

•you wanted so badly to stop and unpack that wild, sudden confession, but you were already fiending for his popsicle like a motherfucker. through your hazy vision, you see bi-han lock eyes with you, a devilish glint present. he reaches between the two of you and palms himself while you try to relieve the pressure on your clit using the back of his hand.

•finally fed up with the foreplay, bi-han pushes you off of him, making you elevate your body on your knees. he tugs his shirt up and his pants down. his member springs free from the tight constraints, and lord help us all, it's as long and thick as it felt through the pants.

•"you wish to get back at that pompous wannabe?" he asks, voice dangerously husky. "get to it then." obeying like a dog, you settle between his parted legs. still holding his dick, he slaps it against your cheek expectantly.

•the tension, the hunger, and the high emotions overtook your strength to remain proper in front of the grandmaster as you eagerly licked at the base of his shaft, trailing kisses all the way to the warm tip. once you feel properly sure of his size, you slowly but surely sink him into your mouth, barely able to get his dick deep enough without causing a strain on your jaw muscles. bi-han tries to keep his arousal under wraps, but when he feels you hollow out your cheeks to give him the greatest pleasure possible, he lets out a little whine of surprise, though it still sounds more animalistic due to his grumbly voice.

•you hold this position for a moment, letting your warmth completely encapsulate his freezing body. you were starting to see stars in the corner of your eyes before bi-han harshly pulls you up by your hair, making you sputter for breath. a thin trail of saliva follows your lips as he raises your head.

•"wait," he commands breathlessly, fumbling with his other hand to find your phone that was discarded onto the mattress. when he does find it, he struggles even more, mind blank from horniness and also his unfamiliarity with smart devices. you chuckle to yourself, climbing back up to his chest and weaving your way between his arms to show him how to record a video. when it's finally figured out, you crawl back down to where you were and grab his cock with a full hand, stroking it lazily. he winces.

•"sensitive already?" you ask in a low tone, giggling to yourself. bi-han didn't have much time to relieve his sexual desires, so it's no wonder that the slightest bit of head nearly sends this man flying to the moon. "i expected more from you, grandmaster—"

•"—shut the fuck up," he replies sternly, not finding your teasing all too funny. "i'll silence that whore mouth."

•woah

•and with that, he holds the phone up, angled downward at you as you angle your lips on his tip again. he grabs the fistful of your hair and sinks you down once more, this time holding you in place. you barely had time to get some air in before getting your throat thoroughly plugged. you put your hands on his thighs to ensure you'd stay upright, but always sure to look at the camera as you gag and drool.

•"that's more like it," he'll purr, pushing your hair from your face as he holds you still. he then directs his voice to the camera. "how about that, cage? taught your dog some new tricks. i'd say she's exceeding expectations."

•when he finally lets you breathe, you only get a couple gasps before willingly taking his cock again, this time bobbing rhythmically. bi-han, as a ninja, is incredibly good at staying silent, so all he can do is let out occasional exhales and sharp intakes of breath as you suck him off.

•you're sure to put on more of a show than usual for the video, looking into the camera with a sultry smile even with your lips stretched out to accommodate for his giant dick. you've got an expression that says "fuck you."

•when bi-han has enough of your pace, he starts to buck his hips into your throat, creating a nasty gargling sound in the back of your head that would be otherwise nauseating. you're surprised he's not ripping the hair straight from your scalp as he death grips a fistful. frosty hands grip the sheets, solidifying them with a thin sheet of ice as he nears the edge. his body can't decide between lurching forward and arching back as you make him cum.

•he's a silent orgasm-haver. bi-han bites down hard on his lower lip as he releases, clenching his eyes shut and knitting his brows together. and boy, does he love to ride the high of fucking your face. he loves it even more knowing he'll have an audience.

•he wanted to cum into your mouth so badly, but even he knew better. he had to make the money shot something memorable. cum painted your face beautifully, dripping down your cheeks and catching in your eyebrows. there was even a thick streak starting from your hairline. with no time to ever do this himself, his jizz accumulated within him for quite some time, now soaking your entire face.

•bi-han stops the video, but only to snap photos of your messied, flushed face. gripping your cheeks to hold you in place, he's sure to make sure every drop of cum is within camera shot as he catches his breath.

•you swipe a glob of his load from your forehead and stick your finger in your mouth, tasting his arousal for you with a smirk.

•"definitely sending that to him," you giggle as he tucks his dick back into his pants. "i'm in your debt, bi-han." normally, he would've protested the use of his first name from an associate of liu kang, but he was too high from his orgasm to really give a shit. instead, he grumbles a small "mhm," and nods, fighting a little smirk himself.

•he stands up and grabs a loose towel, holding up your face more sweetly this time as he wipes you clean. the gesture was oddly soothing. he seemed like a pump and dump kind of man, and he probably is! but you're touching a sweet spot he didn't know he even had. even so, he's silent, never once communicating this and instead expressing it through the minor gesture.

•a relationship doesn't quite blossom yet, but the sexual tension between you two is now incredibly obvious to the lin kuei. his gaze lingers, as does yours. the touches during training last a moment longer. your silly little plan of making johnny angry seemed to have blossomed a new... situationship? we'll unpack that some other time.

•the following morning, your phone rings. it's johnny.

•"DID YOU BLOW THE FUCKING ICE NINJA?!"

[holdmytesseract]

hi friend! 👋

I have a cute and fluffy request for the Baby Fever AU! 💕Narfi's first steps, Loki and Ella are out on a daddy-daughter date (you can choose where they're going) while Narfi and reader are at home together.

While reader has her attention on other tasks, little Narfi takes his first steps towards reader. When Loki and Ella returns home, reader surprises them with Narfi walking towards them 🥹💚

Growing Up

☆ The Baby Fever AU ☆

Loki x Y/N feat. Narfi & Ella

Summary: Narfi takes his first steps, causing you and Loki to realise that he's not so tiny anymore...

Warnings: fluff, fluff and even more fluff!

Word Count: 1,7k

a/n: I know it took me quite some time, friend, and I'm truly sorry for it. 🥺 Also, I really hope that you like it and that I did your request justice. Thank you again for the amazing moodboards you made for me, @chennqingg ! 💖

Baby Fever Masterlist °☆• Loki Masterlist °☆• Masterlist

divider by @fictive-sl0th <3

Today felt like a pretty normal Thursday to you. Getting up at seven in the morning, making sure Ella got ready for school, while Loki prepared breakfast - bless him - and of course actually dropping your daughter off at school. Since you had 'Ella duty' this week, your husband tended to little Narfi and got the very young man dressed, fed and ready for the day. Sometimes, it was pretty chaotic and quite hectic. Especially on the days you were working as well - not full-time, though. You were still in maternity leave, but Nick allowed you to work two or even three days a week, if you needed a change of scenery or just a break. Just like today. Sure, Loki had to return to being an Avenger as well, but you always made it work. Besides, the others were happy to jump in as a babysitter as well.

After dropping Ella off at school, you drove straight to the SHIELD headquarters for work, leaving Narfi with Loki, who'd leave your son with auntie Nat for the rest of the morning, because Steve hated it, when Loki missed out the important briefings which concerned his 'development' as a resident of planet earth. Or in other words: Making sure he still behaved, didn't relapse and was a 'hero' and not a threat to humanity. In your eyes, it was ridiculous that he still had to 'prove himself' after all those years... After getting married and starting a family... After everything he had done for the Avengers, America and the whole world. But well... Who were you to speak up and change things? It was how it was.

Seven hours of going through reports and sorting files, you clocked out of work. Yes, it wasn't much you were doing, but it was something. Better than just staying at home. You loved being a mom, but sometimes you needed to see something different - and you were more than happy to rejoin your friends in hopefully near future and slip back inside your Avenger combat suit.

Instead of driving to school to pick up Ella, you drove back home. Loki had already done that; taking his princess out for a daddy-daughter date to the indoor swimming pool.

Arrived at the Avengers compound, you didn't even bother to drop your stuff first; instead heading immediately for Natasha's. Your motherly instincts were literally screaming at you by now to go see your baby son. So, you did.

Your best friend opened the door to her apartment for you with a huge smile and little Narfi on her arms; dressed in his white sweatpants and matching jumper. He looked like a baby smurf - which was probably one of the cutest things you had ever seen and would get certainly never tired of seeing again. "Mama!" Narfi squeaked happily from behind his pacifier as soon as his beautiful ruby eyes registered you; impatiently squirming in his auntie's arms. "Hiii, baby boy!" You smiled brightly and immediately took him into your arms. His adorable giggle urged to your ears; causing you to smooch his little cheek with kisses, and once you had thoroughly greeted your son, you turned your attention to the Black Widow leaning now against the door frame still with that smile on her lips.

"Hey, Nat." You shuffled closer to hug her, what the Russian beauty instantly reciprocated. "Hey, babes." "Thank you for looking after this little guy here," you said; pulling back from the hug and gently bouncing Narfi on your arm. Natasha shook her head. "No need to thank me. I love playing the cool auntie part." "I'll keep that in mind," you winked, causing your fellow Avenger to giggle.

"Alright. We'll be going then. Gotta do some chores... See you around, Nat." "Sure thing, babes."

You looked down at Narfi, who had snuggled against you; head buried in your neck. "Say bye bye to auntie Nat, Narfi." "Bye bye," babbled the little boy in a sweet, quiet voice; clearly on the verge of dozing off. Natasha smiled and waved at Narfi, "Bye bye, маленький смурф." who instantly lifted a small hand to wave back. Smiling and bidding your goodbye to the Black Widow as well, you pressed a kiss against your son's forehead and ran a hand through his black locks.

Back in the apartment, you put the toddler down for a nap on his beloved floor cushion - which he mostly preferred for a nap, instead of his bed. Now that your son was sleeping peacefully across the living room, you had the time to do some chores. On today's programme: folding laundry. So, you spread out on the sofa, switched on the TV - but kept the volume down, of course, and got to work.

From your position, you had the perfect view on Narfi as well; having an eye on him from time time. Unfortunately, that didn't always keep him from escaping your watchful gaze. Just like Ella, was he his father's child... Sneaky and definitely a tiny mischief maker. Not quite as much as his big sister, but nevertheless...

You could swear that you only didn't look at him for five minutes - and suddenly was the floor pillow empty.

Shit.

"Narfi?" You called through the living room; letting your eyes wander and already moved to stand up. He wasn't in this room anymore. You sighed and shook your head with a small smile. "Little rascal..." You mumbled under your breath and crossed the living room; aiming for the hallway.

The good thing was, that Narfi couldn't get far; not having learned how to walk just yet. The emphasis was on the word 'yet'.

You rounded the corner into the hallway, "Narfi?" and found your son standing - hands free - beside the clothes basket, which he had clearly used to pull himself on his feet. At the sound of his mama's voice, the toddler turned his head - which caused him to immediately lose balance and land on his small bum.

Your eyes widened. Was he about to take his first steps and you 'interrupted' him? "Baby, were you about to take your first step?" Narfi was already pulling himself up again; using the clothes basket as a help like before. A sweet huff left his small lips once he made it on his small feet; causing you to stifle a giggle.

"Try again, baby smurf, come on." Narfi turned on slightly wobbly legs towards you; hand gripping the basket for dear life. "Mama!" You smiled and walked quite a few steps closer, before you squatted down and opened your arms. "Yes, c'mere! Come to mama!" You tried to encourage Narfi; a bright smile on your lips.

The smile got even wider, when your son suddenly let go of his support - and took a very wobbly, unsteady step towards you. With you mouth agape, you giggled. "Yes! You did it, baby! C'mon! One more?" Your happiness infected Narfi and he smiled a bright, toothy smile. Giggling, he made another two fast and wobbly steps, before he lost his balance and more or less stumbled into your arms. You reached out and caught him, before he could hit the floor; sweeping him up in a hug.

"Yay!" You cheered and peppered his cerulean, chubby cheeks with kisses. "Mama is sooo proud of you, Narfi." The little boy just cooed and gurgled happily.

An idea crossed your mind.

"Let's surprise daddy and your big sister when they come home, huh? They'll be so happy to see you walk." Your toddler's eyes widened at your suggestion. "Supise dada lala?" Narfi couldn't say Ella yet, so he settled on 'Lala' - it was the cutest thing ever. You giggled; nodding. "Yes, baby smurf. Come on."

The laundry was long forgotten; deciding to play with Narfi instead and helping him practising to walk.

After a very successful daddy-daughter date at the indoor swimming pool, Loki and Ella returned back home in the evening to the Avengers compound. The little girl's hand was neatly tucked into her father's bigger one as they exited the elevator. Ella was definitely tired and worn out - just like it should be after such a day. That was most probably the reason why Loki was carrying not just his duffle bag in his free hand, but also Ella's pink Disney princesses rucksack on his back.

Together, they stepped down the hallway and into your family's apartment. "Darling?" Loki called out; taking off his shoes and helping his tired daughter to get out of her jacket. "Mommy? We're back!"

The pair heard a small voice along some shuffling, before you rounded the corner into the entrance area with Narfi walking in front of you; yet gripping tightly onto your pointer fingers. "Hey, you two," you greeted them happily. "The baby smurf and I have to show you something." Proudly, you let go of your son's small hands - and let him walk a few small, still wobbly step. Before he could topple over, you grabbed him quickly around his middle; holding him steady.

Both, Loki's and Ella's jaws were on the floor; not having anticipated this. Sure, Narfi had tried to walk now for days - probably weeks, but it looked like he needed some more time to learn... Apparently not.

"He is walking now!" A not-so tired anymore Ella squeaked and crawled forwards and clumsily, but lovingly hugged her little brother - who didn't quite understand why everyone was making such a big fuss. He just squeaked along happily.

Loki met your gaze; his beautiful blues shining with a few tears. "Darling, he... Our son is walking..." He whispered; visibly touched, but you heard him anyways. Ella was already helping Narfi back on his little feet; his hands in hers tightly as she helped him walk down the hallway. It gave you the opportunity to step over to your husband. With a smile, you slung your arms around his middle; invading his space. "I know, babe, I know." Loki laughed softly and tried to blink back the tears as he wrapped you up in a hug; strong arms keeping you locked against his tall, defined body.

"We have to watch out now, babe. Soon, he'll start to run," you stated with a giggle, causing Loki to shake his head. "By the Norns, please not. He's already growing up too fast..." You sighed; knew exactly how he felt - and he was right. You rested your head against his chest, giving your husband the opportunity to press a kiss on top of your head. "Mhm... Growing up too fast, just like Ella." You felt the god's chest vibrate with a hum. "Just like Ella..."

маленький смурф - little smurf

Baby Fever Crew: @muddyorbsblr @mochie85 @asgards-princess-of-mischief @jaidenhawke @multifandom-worlds @ijuststareatstuffhereok89 @jennyggggrrr @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @huntedmusicgardenn @fictive-sl0th @herdetectivetheorist @hisredheadedgoddess28 @chennqingg @princess-ofthe-pages @km-ffluv @brokenpoetliz @lokiforever @stupidthoughtsinwriting @loz-3 @jaguarthecat @icytrickster17 @eleniblue @yourfriendlyslytherinhc @mypainischronicbutmyassisiconic @kimanne723 @lou12346789 @smolvenger @isaidoop @lokisgoodgirl @cakesandtom (Continuing in the comments)

[scoonsalicious]

9.1 Lily

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader

Summary: Lily McIntyre, trainer for new SHIELD recruits at the Avengers Tower, has been in love with her best friend, Bucky Barnes, from the moment she met him. She's been content with her role of the #1 girl in Bucky's life, even if it means she has to sabotage a romantic relationship or two. It'll be worth it when he realizes that they're meant for each other, right? There's just one small problem: Lily McIntire never expected Bucky Barnes to fall for You.

Warnings: (For this part only; see Story Masterlist for general Warnings) Language,

Word Count: 1.8k

Previously On...: You spent a lovely day at the Compound with Bucky, even if he did tell you he thinks you should stop having sex so you can focus on getting to know one another better.

A/N: In the interest of saving my arm, I'm going to move to a temporary every other day posting schedule. So, for the time being, updates will be Mon/Wed/Fri/Sun/Tue/Thus/Sat etc, at least until I am fully better.

If you ever feel so inclined to support my work, hop on over to buy me a coffee; it's much appreciated! <3

NOTE! The tag list is a fickle bitch, so I'm not really going to be dealing with it anymore. If you want to be notified when new story parts drop, please follow @scoonsaliciousupdates

Thank you to all those who have been reading; if you like what you've read, likes, comments, and reblogs give me life, and I truly appreciate them, and you!

Lily paced in the empty common room as she waited for Bucky to get back to the Compound from wherever he’d been when she’d texted him. She was furious. She was more than furious. She was enraged. After all the work she’d put into preparing their ‘friend’ date, he had the gall to stand her up, and not let her know until fifteen minutes after he was supposed to pick her up! What kind of a friend did something like that?

And then! When one of her recruits had come in after lunch, telling everyone who would listen how he’d seen Bucky Barnes ride off the compound grounds on his motorcycle with “a hot piece of ass” on the bike behind him, and that the “piece of ass” was wearing one of Bucky’s Henleys? How the fuck was she supposed to take that, if not a blatant slap to the face of their relationship? It was all her recruits could talk about for the next twenty minutes, gossiping like a bunch of little old ladies with absolutely nothing better to do with their time.

Until Lily made them run ten miles.

She couldn’t believe he was doing this to her. Risking their four years of friendship.

And all for what? Some random slag? Was he really that desperate to get his dick wet? Fuck, she’d be more than willing to help him out with that if he’d just ask her. Why was he being so difficult?

She stopped mid-turn when she heard the sound of the elevator doors opening. Spinning on her heel, she watched as Bucky exited and made his way slowly into the common room, looking like a man about to walk into his execution. Good, she thought. Let him feel ashamed for humiliating me like that.

“Hey, Lil,” he said when he’d finally reached her.

“Don’t you ‘hey, Lil’ me,” she said, crossing her arms over her chest defensively. “What you did last night was really hurtful, James”

“I said I was sorry, Lil,” he protested with a sigh, hands thrust deep into his pockets. “I didn’t mean to bail on you– it’s just… she was willing to give me another chance after I fucked it up yesterday morning. I didn’t want to risk blowing it.”

Lily scoffed. “So, you decided that impressing some random hookup was more important than keeping plans you made with your best friend of the last four years?”

“She’s not a random hookup, Lil,” Bucky said, his voice rising slightly. “I told you– I really like this one. I want this to work out between us.”

Lily rolled her eyes. “So, what? Her vagina is so magic you’re gonna let it turn you into a shitty friend?”

Bucky seemed taken aback by that, and Lily began pacing again. “Lil?” He cleared his throat, the sound stopping her in her tracks. “Is the reason you’re so bothered by this because… because you have feelings for me?”

Lily could feel all the blood drain from her face, and she was grateful not to be facing him because she knew she’d look as white as a ghost and completely give herself away. 

“It’s okay if you do,” Bucky said into her silence. “I’d never invalidate your feelings, but you have to know that I don–”

“Ego trip much, Jamie?” Lily asked, turning around and giving the cheeriest fake laugh she could muster at a time like this. “You’re my best friend. I mean, I love you, but only as a friend. Don’t be ridiculous.”

She watched in dismay as a weight seemed to be visibly lifted off of Bucky’s shoulders as he leaned against one of the couches; his entire demeanor seeming lighter at her denial, and she was so glad she hadn’t been honest with him. If she had confessed how she felt and he had outright rejected her… Well, she didn’t know what she would do, but she knew it wouldn’t be pretty.

“Why would you even ask me such a thing?” she prodded, attempting to hide the desperation in her voice to know how the seed had been planted. “Honestly, how did that idea even get into your head?”

Bucky shrugged. “You just never seem to like any of the girls I date,” he said. “I thought that might’ve been why.”

Lily scoffed. “I can’t help it that your taste in women is terrible, Jamie,” she said, and felt a twinge of satisfaction when he flinched at her words. “And if I’m not mistaken, I’ve yet to be wrong about a single one of them in the end, no matter how great they seemed at the beginning. But that doesn’t mean that I want to be with you.”

She was lying to him through her teeth, and she knew that she should feel bad about it, but right now, nothing seemed more imperative than to protect herself from his rejection.

“I don’t care how much you like this girl, Jamie,” she went on. “It was still an asshole move to leave me hanging so that you could go fuck some slut you barely know.”

“Hey,” he said, rising to his full height and using a tone of voice that he had never used on her before. An angry tone. “I admit, taking off like that and not giving you more warning was not my finest moment, and I am sorry that I hurt your feelings, I really am. But she is not a slut, and I won’t let you call her that.”

Lily blinked at him for a few beats, her mouth hanging open in shock. He had never, not once in the entire four years of their friendship, raised his voice in anger toward her before. It was a little frightening.

And kind of hot.

“Okay,” she said with a sigh, trying to make her voice sound contrite while hoping for maximum pity at the same time. “I’m sorry. Look, I don’t want to fight with you. It just made me feel like you didn’t care about me. Like I don’t matter to you the second something better comes along.” 

Bucky walked over to her and put a hand on her shoulder. “Lil,” he said, giving it a gentle squeeze, “you know that’s not true. You’re one of the most important people in my life. I messed up, and I’m sorry. Let me make it up to you.”

“I feel like you’ve been saying that to me a lot lately, Jamie,” she said, and was rewarded when she saw him look away from her in shame. She’d cut him a little bit of slack. “How do you plan on making it up to me this time?” she asked with a smile.

Bucky’s entire face lit up, and Lily’s breath hitched. God, but he was beautiful when he smiled at her like that. “I was actually thinking,” he began, moving around the room as he grew excited, “that since I got you so pissed off, what better to get it out of your system than to go destroy some shit at The WarZone?”

Lily just stared at him, shocked. “That’s the place owned by that bitch Natasha invited to the bar on Friday, isn’t it?”

Bucky slowly nodded. “Uh, yeah… Major… Her name’s Major.”

Lily scoffed and crossed her arms over her chest. “Seriously, Bucky? After the way she treated me that night? You can’t honestly expect me to patronize her establishment after the way she humiliated me in front of all of our friends!?”

Bucky frowned at her, and Lily felt something in her stomach twist at his expression. “She didn’t embarrass you, Lil,” he said. “She was just responding to something you said to her first.”

“Well, I don’t care if that’s how you see it,” Lily said defensively. “She was still a nasty bitch to me. I don’t want to have anything to do with her, and I’m sure as shit not going to hang out with you in the business she runs.”

Bucky sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Lil,” he said, as though it were paining him, “it’s really important to me that you make an effort to get along with Major.”

Lily rolled her eyes. “Jamie, how could it be that important for me to get along with a random girl you just met the other—” The realization crashed over her like a ton of bricks. “Oh,” was all she could say.

Bucky blushed and rubbed the back of his neck with his hand. “Yeah,” he said almost bashfully. “Major’s the girl I’ve been talking about, Lil. She’s the one I went to see last night.”

Lily’s stomach soured at the realization that Bucky had been sneaking around, lying to her these last few days, in order to go see that fucking bitch. “I—” she began. “You had sex with her Friday night, after you brought her home, didn’t you?”

Bucky nodded, not meeting her eye. He had lied to her face, again.

“I honestly can’t believe you’d put some slut you just met over your best friend, Jamie. That makes this whole thing even worse!”

“She is not a slut, Lily,” Bucky said, his voice clipped in renewed anger. “Don’t you dare call her that!”

“Well, what do you call a girl who sleeps with a guy she’s only known for a couple of hours? Would you prefer ‘tramp,’ or ‘floozy’? Something more in line with your times?”

“I had sex with her after only knowing her for a couple of hours,” Bucky said. “So, I guess you think I’m a slut, too.”

Lily’s eyes went wide at the implication of her words. “Of… of course not, Bucky. I would never insinuate–”

“There’s no difference between what she and I did, because we did it together,” he said. “So, either were both sluts, or neither one of us are.”

This conversation was getting horribly out of Lily’s control. “Look,” she said eventually, trying to get things back on track. If she had any hope of surviving this, she was going to have drastically change her tactics. “I don’t even actually care if you slept with her after only knowing her a few hours.” Oh, but she did, she reminded herself. “I’m pissed because ever since you’ve met this girl, it feels like you’ve done nothing but lie to me and toss me aside. That’s not the Jamie I know, and frankly, your behavior is concerning me.”

Bucky’s face softened, his anger dissipating at her words. “You’re right, Lil. I’ve been a dick, and I promise you, the lying is done. And I’m gonna be more considerate when it comes to communicating with you if I have to cancel plans,” he said.

Lily’s jaw twitched at his choice of words. Not ‘I won’t cancel on you again,’ or even ‘I won’t let this new girl come between us.’ Just a veiled threat that he would bail on her for Major, again and again. She was going to have to play this game very, very carefully if she had any hope of actually breaking them up. That meant, for now, keeping him on her side.

“Thank you, Jamie,” she said, plastering on a hundred watt smile. “You don’t know what that means to  me.”

<- Previous Part / Next Part ->

[motherofdogs1010]

A Jedi in Arrakis III (Paul Atreides x Reader)

Summary: While on the run from Empire troops, Jedi padawan Y/N comes to find out that hyper-driving in a compromised craft can have some major setbacks when she discovers not only is on a new planet but a whole new galaxy as well...

Warnings: 18+ only, eventual smut, eventual pinv! sex, current fluff and eventual angst, kissing, simp!Paul, spoilers for Dune 1 and 2, somewhat canon aligned

A/N: Sorry for the hiatus, loves! I'm back and ready to grace you with my works!!

Dividers by @firefly-graphics Banner by @vase-of-lilies

Part I Part II Part IV

The Baron was a man of heavy weight and heavy glutton, he liked food and power with women waiting for him. He liked the power that Geidi Prime gave him, but most of all, he liked the power that controlling Spice, no controlling Arrakis gave him.

This is why he felt anger towards the Emperor for forcing his soldiers off-planet and handing his cash cow to the damned soft-hearted Duke Leto and his house.

He hated House Atredies with a passion and he could recall the countless interactions he had with Duke Leto, the heated arguments he had with the man.

Which is why he felt happy when the Emperor proposed the slaying of House Atreides, the slaughtering of those damned fools.

"There is a rumor floating around", one of his advisors said, "of a girl from not of this galaxy that the Duke has taken in, someone with some extraordinary abilities. The Emperor wants her alive, especially since the na-Duke is said to be quite taken with the girl."

The Baron grumbled as the sound of the Sardaukar's throaty chanting filled his ears.

It was another hot day on Arrakis, the dry heat of the planet making Y/N wonder why Paul and other members of House Atreides were wearing all-black. Y/N had been offered a loose, beige dress that she wore with a scarf covering that concealed her head and neck from the harshness of the sun that came down on the planet.

"Tell me more about Arrakis", she said to Paul as he led her outside. "I feel like we've only ever talked about our home planets."

"Everything I learned is from the archives", Paul began as she noticed a place of worship ahead of them. "The people who inhabit the planet call themselves Fremen, they're the only ones to ever to successfully live here. The sandstorms here are brutal, they ravage and destroy anything that crosses them... maybe not a sandworm, but anything yes."

Paul spoke in a gentle yet enthusiastic voice that made her stomach flop around and she felt her ears begin to get hot. She was embarrassed at the way he was stirring feelings, forbidden feelings in her as they walked along the compound.

"They value water here the most and the Spice they are constantly exposed to gives them blue eyes. Not much is known about them since they prefer to remain to remain remote."

"And you said Spice is what is needed to travel?" she said, Paul nodded.

"We rely a lot on Spice, which is why it is so unheard of that you traveled here without Spice", Paul clarified. "The Emperor gave my father control of this planet to find peace with the Fremen People but before, House Harkonnen controlled it."

Y/N saw inside the temple many people praying; religion wasn't something uncommon back home, there were so many from the Mandolorians to the Sith but she had never really seen such worship before.

"What are they praying to?" she asked, gesturing to the people.

"To Shai-Hulud", Paul said as a warm breeze came by, "it is also a Fremen custom to spit at one's feet with how they value water."

"We greet and say goodbye by saying 'may the force be with you'", she said with a small grin.

She missed home despite the intrigue this galaxy brought, although she wondered how much was about the galaxy than it was her interest and growing intrigue with Paul.

🪐

Jedi law dictated that love or any form of romantic feelings were forbidden yet Y/N could recall a conversation she had with Anakin about the law.

"It's an odd law", Anakin had said, "love is the strongest form of the Force yet it can also be your weakness."

Y/N wondered about it as she walked the halls of the compound; Paul had been pulled away by his mother, Lady Jessica as she said that the Reverend Mother was wishing to speak to Paul. It gave her time to contemplate on her growing feelings for Paul with BB following behind, letting out a little chirp every so often.

Lady Jessica had been pleasant to her, the woman reminding her of some of the older Jedi Masters with her way of speech and stance, but Y/N had managed to piece together that it had to be from strict upbringings and belief of the Bene Gesserit.

"Ah, F/N", a familiar voice called out to her and turning around, she saw it was the Duke, himself.

"Oh, Duke Leto", she said, "how nice it is to see you. Thought you'd be caught up doing Duke stuff."

Duke Leto chuckled as he said, "I'm on my way to find Lady Jessica."

"She took Paul to meet with some Reverend woman?" Y/N said with a questioning tone.

Leto sucked in a breath and nodded, Y/N wondered just how this Bene Gesserit ideology worked. It was nothing she had ever seen before back home and seeing the way the Bene Gesserit sisters carried themselves intimidated her just a bit by how their eyes singularly focused on you as if they were truly trying to dissect you right down to your core.

She just hoped that she wasn't about to fall into their cross hairs.

Another night came to Arrakis with cool air and a beautiful night sky that always kept reminding her of Tatoonie as BB charged in the corner. Her hair was down again and she was in another loose muslin nightgown to help with the heat of the planet; she had the doors closed along with the windows as she sat in her room, watching a hologram archival documentary on the planet.

The Duke was pleasant to talk to, he was knowledgeable and kind, and for some reason reminded her of Obi-Wan.

A knock, a familiar knock echoed in her room and she tried to suppress a smile as she knew it was Paul.

Walking to the door, it slid open to reveal the young na-Duke but she could see something was troubling his mind a bit as she greeted him in.

"Something troubling you, Paul?"

Paul looked at her as they sat on the small sofa that was in the room.

"Your way of believing is so simple yet so understandable", Paul breathed, "my mother was supposed to birth a girl, it's how it's been for eons with the Bene Gesserit."

"Why?" she frowned.

"I think... it's so they could eventually get their Kwisatz Haderach", Paul voiced, Y/N frowned. "It's their Messiah, a male heir that possesses the abilities of the Bene Gesserit."

"And you think it's you?"

"I hope it's not me."

She remembered Paul's earlier explanations of the abilities of the Bene Gesserit sisters and their use of something he called 'the Voice', which reminded her of the way the Force could be used to manipulate weak minds.

Paul was quiet for a moment before he scooted closer to her and she felt her breath get caught a bit in her throat as she stared at him.

"I have these... visions", Paul said, staring into her eyes. "I dream of things that I'm never too sure of and for months, I dreamed of a girl... I dreamed of you."

Y/N felt heat rushing through her as the sound of the hologram documentary rang quietly in the room.

"And ever since you've arrived, it's felt like I've been living a dream... a dream that I never want to wake up from."

And before she knew it, she felt Paul's lips against hers in a soft, gentle kiss and her heart raced as she felt a surge of electricity go through her...

So many thoughts were running through her mind in that quick moment and maybe it was the instant connection she had felt towards Paul, maybe it was some odd corruption from the Sith side of the Force that made her entangle her fingers through his dark, curly hair and push her body against his lithe frame.

But all she knew at the moment was that Paul felt like home.

TAGLIST

@cloudlst

@khlaeesihavilliard

@colors-for-the-world-please

@senhoritaapple

@dark1paradise

[sehtoast]

Rebirth (Homelander x OC)

18+ | heavy descriptions of gore, s4 e4 spoilers, the bad room, mentions of sexual abuse/trauma, torture, they're making each other worse in this one actually and homie deserves that kind of ride or die vibe | Fic Directory

“So, how do you feel?”  

Such a simple question for such a… gruesome task.  Benjamin had gone with Homelander to his moment of reconciliation.  Even helped him pipe sloppy icing writing onto that ugly little Carvel cake.

He knew everything.  Long ago, after busting into Stan Edgar’s personal terminal, Ben found the tapes and files on Homelander’s childhood.  Watching them had been sickening at best, but hearing the personal account as described to him by his lover over the years?

Even the do-no-harm bug himself couldn’t find a reason to prevent Homelander from following through.  He’d found John crying in front of that shattered mirror and pulled him out of his stupor once the banter ended.  Benjamin held him on the couch as he sobbed as he often did after run ins with the different facets of his psyche.  Used to be that there was no one to hold him at all, but the bug changed that.

Homelander would crash, but he would have somewhere safe to burn.

He thought about John’s various accounts of his childhood on the flight to the compound.  The incinerator, the bad room, how on edge he always was under the all seeing eye of big brother.

Usually the violent details emerged after nightmares.  Babbled words and cries for mercy as he tossed and turned until he’d shoot up in bed with his eyes primed to protect himself from his own memories.  Benjamin always held him afterward and listened.

“Sometimes I can still feel it,”  John would say, eyes glassy as he’d fight to keep those little shakes from turning into sobs.  No signs of weakness, no reaction.  Part of his conditioning– he cannot let the world know it hurts.  He cannot be a disappointment.

Ben would all but beg him to let it free anyway.  “You don’t have to be strong with me, pumpkin,”  he would always whisper.  “I love you even when you’re not.  Promise.” 

“But I– I have to be,”  Homelander would reply.

Benjamin always asked why.

John could never give an answer.

The worst were the more… intimate details.  Benjamin knew less about these, but there’d always been a sneaking suspicion that things along the lines of that happened.

Homelander spilled the beans after a panic attack during foreplay.  Stuttered out the details of masturbating during the security guard’s breaks. Doing what young boys do, he’d said.  Failing to finish in time and finding himself subject to mockery day in and out.

The resulting body image and self confidence issues, and the occasional difficulty with performance were all the consequence of some jackass further torturing the boy who never had a safe moment to feel what he described as the only good he could find in that awful room.  

Each time, Ben held him.  Promised him he was safe.  There’s no judgment, no mockery, no humiliation, and certainly no name-calling.  With kisses pressed to John’s knuckles, the two would talk it out until the world became steady again.

It’s why Benjamin doesn’t mind watching John laser that piece of shit’s dick clean off.  He doesn’t bat an eye to any of it.  The torture they face is but a fraction of what they’d done to that little boy– a drop in the lake of the things they swear up and down they don’t recall.

The axe forgets, but the tree remembers.

After listening in on Barbara’s account of Homelander’s conditioned obedience and the nature of his birth, he finds he has no problem holding her steady as his love slaughters the rest of them before her eyes.  

Bit by bit, he dismembers them.  Split them in two and paints the room with their remains.  He laughs and laughs, grinning wide and proud as he pries a man’s jaw open until his neck splits just to rip the tongue from his gullet and chuck it at her face.  He doesn’t stop until they’re no more than unrecognizable piles of flesh and viscera. 

True to their perfected teamwork, Ben webs Barbara to the wall to feast her eyes upon Homelander’s good work, and John?

Well, lasering the door and melting it forever shut was ingenious.

She will die in there, nice and slow. It’s no less than she deserves.

It’s heartbreaking to see how little it did to soothe Homelander’s pain.  Revenge, as Benjamin had told him many times, never quite worked out the way people wanted it to.  It’s potent for as long as it takes for the elevator to reach the surface.  It simmers during the flight.  Fades by the time they touch down at the tower.

And then turns to deep, lurching sobs as they shower it all away.

Release, yes… but not enough.  

It could never be enough.

“Johnny–”

“Homelander,” he chokes through tears. He’d been correcting people all day about his name.  “I’m– I just–”

Ben shushes him softly, thumbs swiping away the odd gooeyness of blood and tears.

“H-Homelander… just–” he tries again.  “Just for now… please…” 

Because Homelander was safe.  Homelander had the strength to overcome.  Homelander was the ideal and the power to protect himself.

The arms around Ben’s abdomen pull him impossibly closer.

“Homelander,” Benjamin murmurs, still stroking softly at his love’s face.  “I love you.”

Maybe not the best thing to say to the man claiming to be casting off the shackles of love, but certainly something always worth reminding him of while he crumbles.  There’s a million promises behind those three little words.

I love you when it hurts.  I love you when it doesn’t.

When it is ugly.

When it is beautiful.

As long as it is you.

His love succumbs to more cries, but Homelander knows, deep down, that it’s okay.

He is safe.

He is loved.

There will be no mockery. No humiliation.

Here, in the arms of his little spider, he need not be strong.  Here, he may simply be.

[heartfullofleeches]

yes please dear god smile reader is baby

[Very baby. Here's how Yan Scientist and their slime formally met]

"Subject 43? Payment for yesterday's efforts."

"An apple....but you said I could go home."

Feeding day - as if their headache couldn't get any worse. Like common livestock, their possessions squealed and whined about the most senseless things. Pleading for testing to cease; begging to be returned to their families when it was their love ones who sold them to begin with. The scientist would sooner snip out their tongues if it meant a moment of peace, but they were not a tyrant - plus verbal records of their subjects experiences was easier to stomach at night than written. The audio logs had lulled them to sleep better than any pill or liquid could.

"I said it was a possibility - if you did what I asked properly. You may have killed your cellmate, but you did not bring me their eyes. A shame really. I took the time out of my day to prepare your meal by hand. Ah - well, there's someone who will appreciate my efforts more. Tell me, tuna or ham?"

A wet gurgle sounds from the scientist's pocket."

"Both? You greedy devil. I suppose you do deserve something special for putting up with the same pains that I do."

The scientist picks up two sandwiches and smushes them together as the mass in their pocket becomes denser; gooey tendrils slithering up the length of their coat and crawling onto their shoulder as they lift their hand. The blob sucks up the sandwiches into its gelatinous body, wiggling with delight as they're broken down and absorbed into its structure. The scientist pats the gel with one finger causing it to vibrate more violently resulting in a breathy laugh from its owner.

"Alright, we have more subjects to feed. Come on, You - you too."

The scientist snaps their fingers at the Henchman wheeling the cart who closes the cell door as they both exit. The slime creeps down their shirt and through their sleeve as they walk, resting in the scientist's palm. A marvel their little companion was. They wished they had the honor of creating it, but it's origins were a mystery even to them. The scientist found the creature munching away on the undissolved bones of a past test subject. From numerous experiments, the scientist discovered their new lab partner could not only breakdown organic compounds, but most non living object too and had a choice on what it consumed. It made for the perfect little helper to get rid of all the dead bodies and those who oppose them. The best part about the slime was that it had no mouth and therefore the most tolerable member of the team.

The scientist's smile melts as they enter the next cell. The stress that had fled them by the usage of their slime as a stress toy skyrocketed seeing the act of utter betrayal pointed at them. A lackey, standing over a motionless subject - gun raised at their employer. The scientist sighs.

"Please remove your mask."

The Henchman does as told. Figures - there was only one other person the scientist trusted with the codes. They supposed trying to make this a family business was a poor decision.

"Emery - this has got to stop."

A chuckle. "Does it really?"

"You won, just let him go. I know you didn't have the best upbringing, but he still your -"

Emery grits their teeth, squirming the slime so hard it slithers out of their grip. "You don't know shit. If it makes you feel any better, I haven't actually done anything to him - yet. Just locked him down here, with all the others nobody would care to miss. There is no persuading me on this. If you have nothing else to say - do it."

Their Henchman reaches for his gun, Emery rests their hand over his. Through clouded view and reasoning, the figure steadies their gun. They look away, unable to look as they pull the trigger on the once innocent child they knew. Emery doesn't flinch as it fires - a teal web covering the entirety of their chest and dissolving the bullet as soon as it hits. Their attacker looks on in horror, but before they can do anything Emery takes their henchman's gun as their own and fires back, bullet piercing their heart. Emery's head falls, expressionless eyes gazing out at the person left alive - mouthing two words.

"Your fault."

Emery exhales, placing a hand over their chest and gathering the slime into one ball. "One thing after another. Now I have to fire a new head. Eat your meal and return to me when you're done."

They lower the slime to the ground who plops out on the smooth surface - spitting an apple out that rolls at the scientist feet. They pick it up as they walk off, wiping away tears.

-

A picture frame shatters.

"Why would you choose him and not me. Why!?"

The picture holds a smiling, bucktooth child in the arms of their butler as they show off their award for the camera and all to see. The person who taught them everything, the only one there when they had no one. Emery throws an empty bottle at the image, sinking down at the foot of their bed - cradling their arms to their chest.

"why....."

The sound of wet suction weaves into their cries as the slime wrigglies itself beneath the crack in their bedroom door. It inches towards them, shaking violently before spitting up as locket on the floor. Emery goes to grab it, but as they do the smile shoots up their arm and spreads out, and puffs up over their shoulder like a makeshift pillow. Emery cards their fingers their hair, climbing to their feet and pocketing the trinket.

"I guess I do need some rest. Thank you, You. You seem to be the only one I can't trust."

More gurgles.

"I guess I should give you an actual name eventually." They sight - broken body collapsible on their bed and crawling under their blankets with the help of their aid. The slime hops up on their pillow as they raise their head - solidifying as they rest. "Goodnight, You."

That night - Emery had the worse night's rest they ever had in their twenty-seven years of living.

"You are my sunshine. My only sunshine. You make me happy, when skies are gray~"

Is someone ... singing?

"You'll never know, dear. How much I love you-"

The voice sounds so familiar....no... There's more than one. It's hard to remember something so sweet - when all those voices ever did was beg you to stop.

"Please don't take - my sunshine away."

Emery shoots up like a lightning bolt. Their hands search the bed for their glasses which had fallen - finding a squishy, but very real feeling hand beneath their grasp. Emery locates their glasses as the body's see through eyelids peel back.

"Goodnight, You!"

Emery screams - rolling out of the bed in a tanglement of their blankets and obscenities. The interior in the bed sits up, puzzled; bubbles floating through their translucent body as their anxiety peaks.

"Emery.....this you?" The figure points, noting the odd number of fingers on its hand as it looks at theirs. "Mmm wrong...."

Emery's eyes widen as the slime's sixth finger merges into the fifth. "Y-you?...."

The slime chirps. "Emery!"

Emery looks strength in their knees. "What? How?..."

"Ahhh.... You - eat meal... gr...ow better at shape. Too much at one time - hard to understand. Able to single out things Emery say - Emery is... the only one I can trust."

Emery clutches their head. "Ngh..."

"Help?" The slime lunges foward, reverting to its natural state as it crashes into the floor and forming back into its humanoid shell as it catches them before they stumble. It was hard to notice with half of them hanging off the bed, but the slime was massive - size their size if they had to estimate. They bury their face into their hands. "This can't be happy.

The smlie's droppy smile falters. "Wrong? Wanted to make you happy. I..will go back if it makes you happy. Sad Emery...makes me sad too."

Emery looks up at the slime. They raise out their hand, stroking the slime's cold cheek. It hums with a full body shutter - leaning into their palm until their fingers poke through the membrane. Emery retracts their hand, sliding it into their now empty pocket.

"It's fine. I guess we really need to pick a name for you now."

"Mm I pick?"

"Do you have something in mind?"

"Y/n!"

"Where'd you pick up that one?"

The slime points to their head. "Memories. I... like it the most out of them."

"I see... Y/n, it's cute. Alright, Y/n - let's go get some breakfast."

The slime spits a small bag from its stomach contents onto its hand, giving the trail mix too them. That's much more alarming when it's coming out a real mouth and tongue.

"Breakfast!"

Emery takes it with two fingers, holding the dripping bag away from their face. "Thank you, Y/n......at least I have you by my side."

[jetblack4realz]

forgiveness - peter hayes x reader

summary - after a lifetime of letdowns from peter, you're unsuspecting of new loyalties

warnings - nah he's just a douche as per usual

word count - 3.6k

______________________________________________________________

peter hayes was no stranger to you.

you'd grown up together in candor, continued into dauntless, and went on the run to amity with tris, four, and caleb. in every one of those situations, peter was always on the wrong side.

so why didn't you expect it?

because every time you got thrown together by whoever it was pulling the strings of fate, he made impressive efforts to win you back. he was convincing and he was dedicated, and you loved him for it.

"hey beautiful," he mumbled, arms wrapping around your torso from behind. a small gasp slipped from your lips as you turned your head to see him. he pressed a kiss to your neck and you smiled.

"what are you doing, peter?" you asked with a small laugh, trying to push his arms away but he refused, instead pulling you closer into him.

"just missed you," he answered, pressing another kiss to the skin beneath your ear.

"are you off for the night or do you have more shifts?" you asked, the boy finally letting you turn around in his arms. you hated pda in the hallway, but something about him made you more inclined to let it happen. that and you hadn't seen a single person on this side of the compound on your way back to your apartment.

"i'm off," he answered, smiling down at you. "you?"

"free as can be," you told him, hands on his biceps.

"perfect," he mumbled with a smirk, leaning down to press his lips gently to yours. you obliged, kissing back with a soft smile at the care he took while kissing you. he pulled away. "can i stay with you tonight?"

you laughed. "when do you not?"

he grinned, keeping one arm around you as he began pulling you back to your place, pressing another kiss to your forehead.

"you're clingy, peter," you told the boy as he fished his spare key from his pocket and unlocked the door, letting you and himself in. he shut the door, locking it again, and immediately wrapping you up in his arms. your hands rested comfortably against his torso, smiling up at him. "i love it."

"i know," he grinned, winking at you as he leaned down to kiss you again.

he made it so easy to just believe him. it was easier to trust him again, you thought. he wouldn't do it again, so just trust him. he wouldn't do anything to hurt you - he would never. not again.

tris had made a point of using peter to get to the control room and you were left in charge of watching him as she found a way in.

he called your name three times before you finally turned, eyes set in disdain.

"you're helping them? seriously?" you asked him.

"they're the ones with the power, the ones who control the ladder i need to climb," he answered, a huff in his breath.

"and you think this is the way you're gonna do it? by helping them destroy abnegation?"

"if it needs to be done, then yes."

"and you seriously don't care that people are dying, that our friends are the ones killing them?"

he didn't answer you.

you walked away, eyes in the direction of the control room listening for any signs that tris might be in trouble. you heard a lot of movement and suddenly yells of fear and you were moving. but before you could even exit the alcove you'd hidden in, two arms wrapped around you and pulled you back in.

"get off of me!" you yelled, slamming your heel into his foot. he grunted, his grip loosening enough for you to pull forward. but he was quick, hand on your bicep as he ripped you back, the force enough to knock you to the ground. your gun clattered to the floor, both of you lunging for it.

unfortunately for you, it'd knocked closer to him. he grabbed it, turning on you quickly, the barrel at your face.

your expression was stone cold as you just watched him. "so, this is where we're at, huh?"

"i guess so," he answered. "i can't have you helping her more than you already have."

"why? so jeanine can have more power? that doesn't help you, peter, there's nothing in it for you," you told him.

"more than if tris and four finish whatever it is they've started," he said.

your eyes stayed locked as you found your feet underneath you, peter copying your every move until you were both standing again. you took a step back towards the hallway.

"you won't shoot me," you stated as though it were a cold hard fact. "you can't."

it all happened in a blur - you turned on your heel, ready to run towards where you could hear fighting taking place, when suddenly a burning went through the flesh of your tricep. you cried out, hand coming to grasp at the bloody flesh. you turned to peter with wide eyes. the bullet had just grazed your arm and you knew it was intentional, but you also knew it was a warning. he would shoot you. and he didn't look regretful about it.

you convinced yourself that he was doing it for you. it's what he told you, what he showed you in his actions post-fight, and it was the only idea that kept you from breaking down in the medical wing of amity, in your old room in candor, at dauntless, and in the barracks at o'hare airport.

"i'm sorry." you were surprised when he spoke up, just the two of you in the small medical room in amity. his arm was wrapped and bandaged just like your own and you were being kept for observation. your trek to amity through the forests and fields surrounding chicago weren't exactly clean, and neither were your wounds. fearing infection, you were confined to a room with peter for 3 days.

"thanks." the word held little to no meaning for the both of you and little to no emotion.

"i mean it. what i did - it was to protect you. i didn't know what was happening in there and i... i couldn't lose you."

"so, you shot me instead?" you asked, finally looking over at him from your place on your bed. "you could've come with me if you were so worried. made sure i was safe by helping me help tris and four."

"i never could've ensured your safety, not with dozens of dauntless around all with the mission to protect the woman you were trying to kill," he said, a furrow forming between his brows.

"we're dauntless too," you said, emphasizing each word individually. "we're supposed to be brave. one hell of a dauntless you are."

a cold silence passed over you both and you huffed, rolling onto your side away from him. you could feel his eyes on your back and you silently willed him away.

"i'm sorry. you're right, i was scared. i wasn't willing to risk your life for the stiff's or four's - they're not worth it."

the way he said it - so soft and thoughtful - made you want to believe him. and when his voice came through again, gentle and almost timid, you did. "can i stay with you?"

you rolled over, looking at him with an unimpressed roll of your eyes, but failing to hide a small smile. he slowly pulled the sheet back and rose to his feet, crossing to your bedside. he smirked slightly, offering you a small shrug as two of his fingers brushed your hair out of your face.

"old habits die hard," he told you. you watched him for a few more moments before sighing dramatically and turning onto your back, moving slightly to the side to let him in. he was quick to slide in next to you as his smirk grew, his arm snaking under your back as you turned into him, resting your injured arm on his chest gently. he held that hand close to him, pressing a kiss to your head. "thank you, beautiful."

he knew every part of you and knew exactly how to get back into your good graces. and every time you let it happen because, well, you loved the boy. more than you wanted to admit.

and every time he let you down, every time he betrayed you and your friends and your beliefs and your core freedoms, you felt a slow burning in your core and a piercing pain behind your eyes as you tried to resist the angry tears from being made out to be a fool. again.

it became harder and harder to keep loving him and it scared you more than you cared to admit. you'd been in love with peter hayes since you were twelve years old, it was an old, aching, exciting feeling you'd grown to rely on. even through changing friends, factions, and governments, you always knew that you would love peter hayes.

almost.

you weren't surprised when you stormed into erudite headquarters to save tris and peter was there. he was bloodied and bruised and helping four off the floor. from what you'd seen, he was on your side and helped save tris before you were able to.

but given the black and blue uniform he was wearing, you knew he hadn't started that way.

he grinned widely when he saw you, crossing quickly to you as evelyn and the others restrained jeanine and her men. christina had made her way to tris, throwing her arms around her best friend, and everyone had begun to clear erudite out. his arms were around you before you could even think about stepping away, his usual smirk pulling at his lips.

"hey beautiful," he said. "miss me?"

you looked around the room, at the dangling wires and remaining screens with images of detailed suicide bots and a list of the people to infect them with. there were files about tris and the box she was supposed to open, the different factions' trials. and it all hit you at once as you looked back at the boy in front of you.

"this was all you, wasn't it?" you said quietly. "you... you had the idea for the suicide virus. because you know tris. and you helped them torture her and nearly kill her for... for what? for status?"

"baby..." he mumbled, but you were already shaking your head, pushing him away.

"no, no you left again. you joined them again, you left me again," you said, trying to keep your volume down to avoid catching the attention of the others, but you already had. tris, christina, and four were watching you both intently, four positioned in such a way you were sure he was ready to jump peter.

peter stepped towards you, mouth open to defend himself, but you shook your head. there was a glare on your face, but what hurt the most was the glint of pain in your eyes as they reddened and began to get glossy. you blinked quickly as you stepped further away.

"don't," you spat. "i don't wanna hear it."

he always had impressive defense, defenses that always had something to do with you, your safety, or your future. it was the last one that usually got you, a promise of a life with him a lot more appealing than continuing to fight over his carefully placed words and actions committed for the dauntless leaders in efforts to climb the ranks. but, now it just pissed you off even more.

"i didn't think they would win, you have to admit it's not likely, and i was trying to secure a position, secure us a position to be able to do well when jeanine came to power!" he defended. he'd followed you back to your abandoned apartment that you'd begun to occupy once more, pleading his case.

"you didn't even try to help! you didn't know who was going to win," you shouted with an exasperated laugh.

"it's honestly a shock that it was anyone but jeanine," he told you. "she had everything set up, it seemed the better situation."

"she didn't care about you peter! she didn't care! she was a tyrant, only searching for power and taking it from people like us, including you," you spat. "you left, seeking something i have no interest in, and claim it's for us, for me. i don't want it, peter. and i don't want you here. get out."

he hadn't been able to get enough alone time to convince your forgiveness yet. you were preoccupying yourself with everything you could - helping four wrangle his mother, helping tris come up with a plan to escape, and eventually helping everyone carry out said plan.

you were beyond pissed when you joined them in the car after carrying out last-minute transfer papers with christina and you found peter sitting in the backseat with caleb.

"what is he doing here?" you asked, eyes flashing to four with a huff.

"he threatened to turn us in," tris answered quickly, glancing back at the boy. "get in."

christina, the good friend she is, sat herself between you and him. unfortunately, the ride wasn't that long, and you soon had to climb a wall - with peter at you side trying his darnedest to talk to you.

"look baby, i'm sorry," he said as you neared the top of the wall, turning to pull himself up and holding a hand out to you. you pushed it away as you stood, unhooking your anchor and rehooking it around a nearer pole as you readied to drop to the other side.

"shut up, peter."

tris and four were dealing with your tricky border patrol situation, giving you just enough time to ensure everyone's anchors were set up same as yours.

"please, i'm trying here-"

"now is not the time," you said with a pointed look.

"just, please-"

"shut up, peter!" you yelled, ducking quickly as shots were fired in your direction.

you were baffled at how many emotions you associated with him now. you were never really sure which emotion you were feeling; love, hate, annoyance, fondness, care, disdain, or hope - but you were feeling it. you felt it all.

you weren't really good at sleeping anymore. you weren't sure if it was because of everything you'd been through or simply how fast your brain was moving as if it were intent on keeping you from falling asleep - but whatever it was, it was costing you energy and what was supposed to be a problem-less bliss away from the turmoil of your world. away from peter.

you turned over in your bed again, finally giving up with a sigh. you stood, wiping your eyes clear of whatever drowsiness had consumed them and beginning your now routine walk around the used-to-be airport.

your hands stayed in the pockets of your sweats as you walked through the halls, breathing in the not-so-fresh air. it was funny being here, so different from chicago and simultaneously comforting and discomforting.

like the figure that was following you.

he'd joined your side wordlessly every night since you arrived, making the first correct decision in searching for your forgiveness since he'd betrayed you in chicago.

finally, you let a soft smile slip onto your lips, stuffing your hands further into your pockets. "hi peter."

he was surprised you acknowledged him, looking at you with such in his eyes. "uh, hi."

"so, can you not sleep either or do you stay up just to walk with me?" you asked the question that'd been bothering you since he began doing so. he smiled sheepishly, offering you a small shrug.

"can it be a bit of both?" he asked.

"i guess," you nodded. the two of you walked in silence again for a few moments before you raised your voice again. "why do you do it?"

this caught him off guard. he wanted to ask 'what?' but he knew the answer. he indulged you, sighing. "i'm selfish. i want the power."

"and you sacrifice everything and everyone even for the chance of it."

"yeah," he confirmed, his head hanging as he watched his feet. his tone dropped to a regretful level. "yeah."

"i don't know why you're hardwired to act this way, who taught you that power was the end-all, but i want to ask you something and i want you to think hard about it," you told him, looking at him with the most genuine, serious expression he'd seen from you, your brows raised and lips pursed.

"alright," he agreed with a nod.

"what do you want? really? and don't let your brain do the talking, we know it's fucked up, so just listen to how you feel. what do you want?"

he wanted to laugh at your insult, but he knew now wasn't the time. and so instead, he thought. for a long time.

you were content walking in silence next to him again as you rounded the corner to the cafeteria and continued your loop to the barracks.

every so often, his eyes would travel to you and settle there for a good while, analyzing every aspect of your features and meeting your eye once or twice.

he called your name gently when you were just a few minutes away from the barracks, his feet stopping as he looked up to watch you completely. you halted as well, turning slightly to look at him.

"yeah?" you asked. he stepped towards you, eyes falling to the floor for a few moments as he collected his thoughts fully. they returned to yours as he stood only a step or two away from you.

"i know what i want," he told you surely.

"and what is that, peter?" you asked.

"to be happy." it was a simple enough answer, one that seemed obvious to anyone else. but, for some reason, it brought a sad smile to your lips.

as he stood in front of you, you realized that for the first time in a long time he wasn't holding his shoulders perfectly square, or pulling his lips into a confident smirk, crossing his arms over his chest, or setting his jaw into a stone-like state. instead, his feet were slightly too close together, leaving his hip jutting out and his shoulders were sagging, his hands lazily at his sides and his mouth relaxed into an uncaring line.

"i want to be happy," he said again and his voice wavered slightly as he did so.

you don't know what came over you, but you threw yourself into his arms, his head tucking into your neck as he clung to your torso tightly. you held his head, fingers raking through his curls soothingly. you felt his eyelashes against your skin and something wet dripping off them as he blinked, causing your heart to clench and you to pull him tighter to you.

"i just want to be happy." his words buzzed on your skin and you nodded, pulling away from him slowly. you kept him close, hands on his cheeks as your thumbs wiped away tears. his hands gripped your wrists tightly, his bottom lip tucked under the top one as he twitched, a sob trapped behind his teeth.

you smiled softly at him. "i know."

"and that has nothing to do with power," he told you quickly, as though if he were to wait any longer he wouldn't be able to say it at all. "i've never been happy with it, but i've always thought it's what i - what i needed. but, i needed you. whenever i left i thought about you and when i came back i needed you near me. the only times i've ever felt what i imagine joy is like is when i'm with you, but i've only ever let you down."

he paused, seemingly to catch his breath, for a few moments, eyes closing momentarily. you attempted to shush him gently to avoid the painful words you knew were coming, but he continued anyways.

"i don't deserve forgiveness. i know that. but please," he breathed out. "if there's any way you could forgive me, i swear to you i'll never leave your side. i'm yours, please baby."

a small, sad smile pulled at your lips as your thumb ran over his damp cheekbone. "you scare me, peter. i don't know if i can trust you." you had to be honest, and he knew that. he appreciated it. but you could see in his eyes that it hurt anyways. "but, i've never been able to not love you. and i've never been able to keep you out of my life for long."

you wrapped your arms around his neck, the boy pulling you quickly towards him, arms wound tightly around your middle. you kissed his neck, hugging him closely. "i forgive you, peter."

if his grip could get any tighter, it did, before he pulled away, his face awfully close to yours.

"i love you so much," he told you, hand cupping your jaw as he captured your lips in his for a long-awaited kiss. it was slightly salty and more emotional than most of your other kisses, but it was equally as passionate. as you parted, he breathed deeply, pressing several kisses to your forehead and top of your hair as he pulled you back into his chest. "thank you, beautiful girl."

[softlymaximoff]

Canvas for your Art

18+ ONLY MEN & MINORS DNI (blank blogs will be blocked you do not have my permission to republish my work onto any platform.

— A/N: HAPPY BDAY RIABEAR @belovaskitkat

— Summary: when your girlfriend surprises you with new art supplies for your birthday, you waste no time in testing them out on your favourite canvas.

— Characters: Soft!dom goofy Kate, Sub!Fem!reader

— Warnings: fluff, D/s dynamics (K, r - respectively), light overstim, pet names, dumbification, light pet play, orgasm denial, lmk if i've forgotten anything else!

— Word Count: 2.85k

"Kaaaaate" you groaned as your girlfriend opened the blinds, allowing the golden flecks of light to seep through the room. It was your birthday today and the two of you had been so busy with missions and briefings that no one really had time to have a wind down and celebrate the 'Tony Way' of a birthday.

"Wakeup sleepy girl, it's your birthday" she sing-songed softly as she padded across the hardwood floor with ease. A disgruntled groan slipped your lips and you heard the archer chuckle. Mornings were not it, you made that very clear.

"Come on baby, I've got plans!" she sat by your starfished state and ran her fingers through your slightly curly hair. She rolled her eyes at the way your body melted further into the mattress before rolling you over and pressing feather like kisses along your forehead.

Quiet giggles escaped your lips at the sudden yet dotting action and you finally opened your eyes. "Morning angel" Kate whispered and kissed your lips gently. "Hi" you whispered out as you kissed her back and just stared at her.

"You look nice" you commented on her minimal makeup look for the day and sat up, rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. "Nothing compared to you pretty girl" she commented right back and you blushed. "8:30 and I've already made your cheeks red" the avenger chuckled and got up from her spot, throwing a few clothing items your way.

You blushed even harder at the double meaning and huffed at the inuendo, "You're so silly Bishop" you pouted as you sat up, stretching your arms above your head. You heard a quiet 'biiiiiig stretch' next to you and it broke you out of your stretch, laughter taking over your body.

"Now you're even sillier what the heck baby!" you managed to wheeze out and slapped her arm lightly. "You stretched like Lucky! It was only appropriate! And watch those hands love" she defended and warned at the same time while the two of you got up started your morning routine. All Kate did was follow you around, occasionally dressing you up here and there and helping with your hair, but were you about to complain? Hell no.

"So what does my birthday girl want to do today? We can do presents tonight and do something this morning or during the day, or we can do them this morning and go out somewhere tonight" she played with your hands as her back was against your chest while you were sitting on the counter waiting for breakfast to cook.

"How about we do something this morning and presents tonight?" you mused and leant down, kissing the top of her head. She swayed gently between your legs and turned to look at you, "Grab your coat, were gonna go to the lake" she murmured after just looking at you with nothing but adoration in her eyes.

And so you did just that, you grabbed your coats, your shoes and Lucky. A couple of thorough room checks for safety and the two of you were on your way to the lake where you first met each other. The story was cute for you, completely ego bruising for your girlfriend.

"Lena look at them! They're so cute! OH please can we get one for the compound!" the archer was swooning over a cuddle puddle of baby ducklings and their mother roaming around the lake edge. "Kate Bishop for goodness sake! Leave the poor water chickens alone! They are paobably so sick and tired of everyone trying to steal them all day! My God Americans really are so weird, Mama Melina had pigs maybe we can play with those, theyre just...four legged muddy chickens?" the widow rolled her eyes at the commotion and fuss over these fluff balls and Kate gasped in horror.

"You take that back! I'm not weird! Pigs are ugly! At least these babies are so fluffy and cute and really just like you! Theyre short and fiesty and loud as hell but so so so cute and squishy!" Kate teased and squished the blondes cheeks. "Get off me you cytka" Yelena shrieked and swatted her hands away, groaning at the instant sensation on the apples of her cheeks.

"Your new nickname isn't Lena or Blondie anymore, its Ducky" Kate howled in laughter at the deadpan glare Yelena sent. "Count your days Katniss" she growled and lunged at her best friend, sending them both on the floor. Thw two got into a playfull tussle until something wet licked Kate's face. "Did you just LICK me?! Yelena! That was uncalled for you ass! Ew!" Kate spluttered dramatically and wiped her cheek like a maniac.

The way Yelena went to roll her eyes but remained quiet and adverted her eyes away from Kate, smirking at something behind her made the purple avenger spin around. "What?! That's so not fair!" the duo were staring at a brunette crouching at the lake's edge with a few stray ducklings at her feet. "They never come up to anyone!" Kate whispered in awe and Yelena saw something in her eyes.

She was a spy for gods sake, she knew how to read people. Kate wasnt looking at the lowkey insult from the animals, but towards you. The Duckling whisperer. She was mesmerized. Anyone could see it. "Go say hi you idiot" Yelena pushed the lovestruck archer a little in the direction and Kate froze up.

"I can't just go over there and say hi! Are you crazy?!" she panicked but the widow smirked instead. "Kate Bishop, do you not know how conversations work? And plus, I'm tired of hearing you complain about how 'Wanda said she's too old for me' 'Tasha and Maria sure seem like theyre fun, do you think they want a third' 'Wanda said she's fine with Vision, is that code for he's got no game' go and say hi or I will for you" Yelena shoved her a little harder this time and Kate went stumbling from her little safe space.

Now she was too close to you to go back to Yelena but too far to try and talk to you without yelling. With a big deep sigh, she stuck up her middle finger behind her where she heard the blonde chuckle and made her way over to you. She slowed a little when she heard your voice speak out onto the lake.

"Aw you're cute too, don't worry I'm not playing favourites, your siblings just like to steal my attention. I promise youre just as beautiful!" you spoke to these small creatures in the softest voice Kate had ever heard. Resting peacefully next to you was Mama duck, her little babies splashing in the water in front of her and running laps around you.

The closer Kate got to you the harder it was to not completely fumble. On the otherside of you was a little sketchbook, a few rough line drawings of the ducks and the lake adorned the slightly oat coloured page. Of course you were an artist! All the more reason for Kate to back out of this! You were so cool and soft spoken, she felt like you yourself belonged in an art museum. 'So beautiful' she thought.

With a final breath of encouragement, she sat down next to you gently as to not startle the ambience and you froze tentatively at the new body but what she said next made you at ease instantly. "They taste great with orange" was the only thing that made its way out of Kate's mouth and she was mortified. From then on, the lake was your favourite place to watch the archer and her scary blonde friend roam around in the early mornings of Spring.

A gentle tug on your belt loop drew your attention back to reality and you realised that 1, Lucky's leash was now in your girlfriend's hold not yours, who knows when the switch happened and 2, she brought you to the infamous spot. "How stupid" You heard her chuckle as the two of you sat down and got comfortable as Lucky went off-leash around the two of you. "It was cuteee, little baby Katie all shy and stumbly" you teased her but a playful (yet threatening) glare made you gulp.

"I still remember how beautiful you looked that day" Kate sighed in awe and pulled you close to her, your head falling on her shoulder. "Stop" you blushed and she kissed your head. "I still remember the way you would always look away when Yelena caught you staring at us" this time you actually whined at the memory. "She's scary! You can't blame me! Not when her sister is Black Widow, of course she'll scare me!" you huffed against her collarbone and she shuddered.

"Baby, Yelena isnt called Ducky for no reason! Tasha I can understand, but Lena? She's a fluff ball" Kate snickered and rolled her eyes at the obvious comparison. A small bark from Lucky broke the two out of your conversation and you couldn't believe your eyes as you sat up. A small family of ducks made their way over towards the lip of the lake and Lucky sniffed the bigger one before walking off with a happy smile, layig behind Kate in the shade.

"Hi little ones! G'mornin Mama and Papa duck" you whispered in awe as the family of 7 waddled towards your area, butts shaking off the water as the little ones followed Mama. "Still as soft as ever my angel girl" Kate murmured and pulled you in for a tender kiss. The two of you stayed in your little bubble for hours until Lucky was getting angsty and losing his concentration and ignoring commands from your girlfriend.

"Buhbye little quackpots" you smiled at the flock and they returned to their watery sanctum, one of the bigger ducks hanging around the area a little longer before following it's babies and paddling off.

A little while later and you found yourself sitting on the couch blindfolded waiting for your girlfriend to return to you. Lucky was asleep on the other sofa so there wasn't even a chance of him alerting her presence. Not a sound escaped your lips while you waited, you knew better than to disobey a command. A small shuffle to the left of you had you almost turning your head but once again, she told you to not to move and stay still.

You could feel her near you, you could head her, you could smell her perfume but nothing was said. The smirk on the archer's lips was growing with every passing second, you were always so good for her. her good little pet. She let a few more seconds pass before taking pity on you and places a few delicate things in your open hands.

She got you a palette, paint and brushes. The very paint set you had been eying for weeks. Every art store was out and you quite frankly had given up on ever finding a supplier that still had it. "Baby..." you spoke in disbelief, your face twisting from shock to awe in a matter of seconds. "Paint me" Kate grabbed your chin gently and it was only then did you notice that she was in nothing but lace panties and an oversized silky top.

You nodded dumbly scrambling to get up and grab a canvas from the art room but a gentle squeeze around your wrist stopped you. "Paint me" she spoke softly and lead your hand down to her thigh. When the two of you first started dating, Kate would always let you use her back as a canvas when you ran out at home. You nodded again and mumbled out 'water, going to need water' as you raced to the kitchen to grab a container for water and steadily walked over to the couch.

"Lie down" you gently pushed her so she was laying flat on her back and started organising your paint. "I miss your art" Kate said suddenly and you sighed a little, straddling her lap facing away from her to start on her thighs. "We both know how busy we get with work and stuff for me to actually start and finish something" you traced an outline of something and you felt your girlfriend's abs tighten underneath you. Guess she was enjoying this as much as you were.

"We need a year long vacation" she let out a humourus laugh underneath you and you had to focus so hard on the art currently forming on her leg. You hummed as you continued your painting, leaning forward occasionally for a colour or an area on her thigh and nearly jumped when gentle but deliberate hands placed themselves just under your butt.

"Kate- you're gonna make me lose focus" you warned quietly when her hands snuck into the leg holes, snapping your panties against the soft skin underneath. "That isn't my name, and you better not mess up, I wanna take a photo of it when it's done" she teased and her hands just started roaming as you tried to concentrate on her thigh.

You took a deep breath in when you realised you needed to reach for some paint again. 100% she was gonna do something while you were bent over. You mustered up all the strength you had and bent over, reaching for the paint and your hips stuttered as she ran a smooth finger over your panties, paying a little more attention to your clit.

"Please- you're gonna make me mess up" you whined when she kept her fingers where they were as you moved back to your spot atop her abs. "My good girl won't mess up, I know it, just ignore Daddy and make her thigh all pretty" Kate cooed from behind you as she slipped a finger inside your panties this time, only focusing on your little bundle of nerves.

Your hips involuntarily started grinding down on her stomach, desperate for more but a smack made them freeze instantly. "Stay still" she reprimanded and pushed that finger inside, adding another one with a smirk. You trapped your lip between your teeth and tried to continue on the painting but when she lazily circled your clit with her other hand you just about folded.

"Daddy- I can't- need more" you whimpered when she started curling them slowly. "No you don't, you need to finish your art. I told you I missed you doing it" she asnwered with fake sympathy and gently guided your hips towards her face, causing your brain to short circuit as she mumbled a 'down'. You complied easily and took a few shaky breaths in before making another attempt to paint her thigh, groaning when she used it to her advantage and slipped your panties and bottoms down to your thighs.

She removed her fingers and licked a bold stripe along your folds, sucking a particular harsh suck on your clit. "Mfhpm" you groaned as you fell into her non painted thigh. "Keep painting lovey" she mumbled against you and you whimpered and raised your hips to stop the stimulation. "Down" she commanded with much more authority this time and your hips stuttered as she pulled them onto her face. There was no way you were gonna finish this painting.

"Make it pretty baby, Daddy wants to show her friends how talted her baby is" Kate spoke lowly before pushing her tongue in your pussy, occasionally sucking. At one point you thought you were suffocating her with how hard you were pushing your hips into her face. No matter how much you tried to escape her torture, she kept you in your place and kept her pace steady. Your slick coated her lips and chin and she was still lazily eating you out. She didn't care.

"I'm n-nearly finished" you stuttered out as you reached over one more time for the final few stokes of the colour in use. Your girlfriend used that for one last opportunity to slide three fingers in and curl them on your sweet spot, completely catching you off guard. A low pornographic moan left your lips and she smirked at the sound. "You're lucky I didn't ask you do paint in silence" she hummed and took her fingers out as you finished her leg. "All done" you sat upright on her abs and looked over your shoulder.

She sat up (with you in her lap) and admired the art, a fond smile gracing her lips. "Just as beautiful as the artist" she turned you around to face her and stole your lips in a needy kiss. One of her hands snuck up towards your neck and she held your face gently before pushing it up so your neck was exposed. "Now let Daddy paint her canvas" she mumbled and started marking your neck in dark angry bruises. Safe to say, you both forgot about taking a photo of the painting and the couch had a colourful flower imprint on it the next day.

[madelynhimegami]

Maguro Sasaki Guide

I can't tell if these have started to balloon out of control, or if I didn't do Ecolo and Amitie enough justice in their posts? If it's the latter, I might need to redo them...

Maguro Sasaki is a bundle of energy tightly secured in a chill package.

He may or may not be the closest anyone in the Puyo cast gets to "shitposting memelord."

When he was younger, Maguro was a frequent target of bullying. Two things changed by the time he hit middle school completely overturned that.

The first thing was that the onset of their grade's puberty led to Maguro to start becoming handsome-- and a lot of classmates noticed.

That's why Maguro has his eyes covered by his hair. His face is so beautiful that anyone who sees it uncovered falls in love. He and Ringo (who is immune by being a childhood friend) call it the "beauty beam."

It has been confirmed multiple times that the effect has no regard for gender. At most, those not attracted to guys are left unaffected (but even that's speculative).

The second thing that happened by middle school is that he decided to get better than his bullies at what they do best-- and succeeded.

Consequently, Maguro has a vast skillset. He also enjoyed developing those skills enough that he considers them hobbies.

Said skillset/hobbies include: ★ Kendama (naturally) ★ Fashion ★ Cooking/baking ★ Sports ★ Chess and tabletop games in general ★ Video games ★ Martial arts ★ Fishing ★ Dance ★ Musical instrument playing (Tuba has been mentioned) ★ Stage magic and sleight of hand ★ Lockpicking ★ PC building ★ Puyo Puyo

Basically, if you can think of a skill or hobby a middle schooler would realistically have, odds are Maguro knows how to do it and is ridiculously good at it

Despite that, he considers himself more of a generalist than an expert in any of the aforementioned.

Becoming good at so many things has led to him being confident enough to not be bothered by bullying anymore.

Not that it happens particularly often. He's actually quite popular, and his skillset makes him in high demand with several student-run organizations.

He prefers hanging out with Ringo, though.

As you can probably imagine, while he's generally unphased by rudeness directed at himself, he does not take the bullying of others lightly.

Probably comes with the territory of not only being a former bullying victim (and being best friends with someone who almost certainly got bullied and may very well still does) (like have you met middleschoolers?), but also an older brother.

Maguro's brother is apparently helpful and kind-hearted, but can be easily exploited because of that.

Being from a fishmonger family, Maguro is well versed in the physical characteristics of fish and is able to identify many different species on sight.

Maguro's greatest frustration with his life is his inability to devote all the time he wants to spend on his myriad hobbies (honestly, mood).

Compounding this is his ever-shifting focus. He often finds himself unable to stick with anything for very long.

Maguro also hates having to sit still doing nothing. He always needs something to keep himself busy.

Socially, Maguro is pretty well put together. He's very chill and good at helping others staying chill. He can get a good read of situations fairly quickly and is pretty good at knowing what to say.

He doesn't surprise easily, either. Generally he's able to roll with a lot, but doesn't handle abrupt changes or being put on the spot very well.

Maguro and Ringo vibe so in sync that they're telepathic when they Puyo battle, be it with or against each other. Literally.

He knows how to best keep Ringo from getting too stressed, and also knows how to ground her wild-running excitement. Except when he's the subject of her excitement.

Maguro's speech and behavior (in Japanese) suggest a connection to a subculture among male Japanese teenagers that started cropping up around the time that Puyo 7 was released. Short version is, it suggests that Maguro's not interested in dating or pursuing a relationship. Interpret that as you will.

As a result, he doesn't like when people assume that he and Ringo are dating.

At some point after 20th Anniversary, but before Puzzle Pop, Ecolo had become enough of a staple to physics club hangouts that Maguro no longer seems to have trouble remembering him.

Ecolo considers Maguro an enjoyable person to play Puyo against, and Maguro does know that Ecolo is a friend (with a tendency for mischief). But beyond that, as far as I know their relationship hasn't been explored all that much.

With how much Ringo vibes with Maguro and Ecolo, I'm very sure the latter two would get along quite well once they got to know each other better.

Maguro has a strong dislike of scalpers. He also says to support your local brick-and-mortar game stores.

It probably goes without saying, but Maguro is a huge nerd. His flavor of nerd tends to be a lot more media-centric than Ringo's.

If something of interest comes up, Maguro can't hold back the urge to infodump. One Quest mini-story has him interrupt multiple times, Emperor's New Groove-style, to just gush about Sonic the Hedgehog. He even admits he's not supposed to be in the story.

He'll also start infodumping when he just knows a lot about of the subject in general. (And that's how Witch ended up concluding he was stalking Ringo)

[gabessquishytum]

Dream got turned around, honestly. He'd been in this city for concerts before, and his habit for walking around the venue after sound check to shake out any final nerves never got him recognized, chased by over-eager fans, and (hounded) into hiding. He didn't want to compound the problem by picking another public place, but he needed to get off the street so he could arrange a pick up.

When he slammed his way into the New Inn at a dead run he was only a few minutes ahead of the crowd - he really needs to stop ditching his bodyguard (and cell phone) - and he hoped he could convince the people inside to hide him.

🎤🍺🎤🍺

When the door of the pub slammed open & shut so loudly before opening, Hob was worried that it was those hooligan kids causing mischief again (as once hooligan himself, Hob understood, but no one messes with his inn.).

Instead he was greeted by world famous (infamous) music phenomenon Dream. He looked ruffled and a little scared (and achingly beautiful), and like he needed help. Helping is a deep part of who Hob is now - half the reason Hob's inn exists is to be a safe place for people who might need help,,, no matter who they might be.

Still Dream might be the most high profile person to ever need Hob's helping hand.

Hob's hullo luv snapped the beautiful head up, allowing Hob to see the rapidly spreading blush. The deep speaking voice that apologized for the trouble (will live in Hob's dreams for the rest of forever) explained that he was being chased be a large group of fans and that Dream needed to hide until they mostly left and he could arrange to get picked up before his concert. Hob never had a better reason to open the inn a little late.

Dream was trying not to stare at the pretty man with tattoos poking out of the neck of his open shirt, that seemed to be designed to show off a little of a soft-looking pelt of chest hair, and tight enough to -cup- accentuate sexy tits 😳. The hair up in a bun,,,,Dream is trying to look "respectfully," but wow is the universe paying him back for being chased through the streets.

ALASKSJSJA love at first sight is always perfect for these adorable idiots <3

Hob is super understanding and kind - he offers his (big, calloused, warm) hand for Dream to take and helps him come around the back of the bar. There's a cozy little nook where Dream gladly sits cross-legged, catching his breath... suddenly realising that he's more or less eye-level with Hob’s very shapely arse. Dream is definitely staring. He can only hope that Hob doesn't feel it.

It's a good thing he's hidden behind the bar, to be honest, because a couple of fans actually come into the inn looking for him. Hob sternly tells them that they ought to leave the poor musician alone, and that if they don't intend to purchase anything then they can skedaddle, please and thank you. Dream falls irrevocably in love with the stern tone of Hob’s voice. He can't help but imagine it ordering him around in bed.....

When the coast is clear, Hob helps Dream up from the floor (once again, those hands are gorgeous and Dream is obsessed). They share a laugh about the awkwardness of the situation... and Dream knows that he's probably got one chance not to totally blow this. He first asks if he can use a phone (to call his poor manager and arrange to be picked up). And then he asks if Hob would like a backstage pass to the concert.

Hob’s trying not to sound too eager with his "Yes, please!" but he really can't bear to let Dream go just yet. The idea of hearing the beautiful man sing is irresistible. And the fact that they're still holding hands at this point is a pretty good indicator of the fact that neither of them really want to be separated just yet...

The press get a few pictures of Dream arriving back at the venue, shyly smiling at a "mystery man" who actually waves at the cameras. But unfortunately, no pictures are taken after the concert when Dream is back in the green room - straddling Hob on the couch, kissing the breath out of him and groping his amazing tits through his shirt. Post-show adrenaline apparently gives Dream the confidence to take what he wants... and Hob truly couldn't be more thrilled about that!!

[buckyalpine]

I’m going to redo this story. Here is a version I wrote that I feel is okay but I have another version in mind so I’ll write that tooo. I didn’t want to throw this away completely so maybe at least 1 person will like this 😭 @paulasocean another version is coming bb ❤️

-

"Okay, I can't for the life of me remember what happened during this mission" Nat grumbled while sitting in the conference room, catching up on paper work after Fury had demanded all mission reports be handed in by the end of the week.

"Honestly, neither can I" Steve shook his head, rubbing his temples, the past few months all melting into a blur. Everyone had been running back to back missions, prioritizing actually saving people over filling out reports. "I only filled out half of it and before I could finish, someone put it away"

"Please tell me it's somewhere in this building, I can't spend the rest of the day writing about how many time Steve jumped off a roof with zero protection" Bucky groaned, most of his mission reports consisting of all the recklessness his bestfriend did.

"Go check the records room, someone probably filed it there" Tony suggested while Bucky nodded, heading down to the very bottom of the compound where there were rooms upon rooms filled with documents on every criminal and terrorist organization to exist as well as individual cases. Steve and Nat followed, the both of them wandering through the shelves where the most recent reports were, quickly locating the latest one.

"He's this big billionaire with the most advanced technology in the world and but he's keeping records in the basement like a creepy grandpa" Nat huffed, scanning the shelves.

"You'd think he'd have these all digitized by now, given how much he loves technology" Steve snorted while Bucky remained silent, preoccupied with a different row of shelves that caught his eye. His heart hammered a little harder than usual as he looked at the five full floor to ceiling shelves that were solely for Hydra. He was sure at least two shelves would be for his atrocities alone.

"Buck, c'mon" Steve patted Bucky's shoulder, already seeing where his bestfriends mind spiraled, "Nat found what she needed, let's get out of here punk"

"Just-give me a second" Bucky murmured, opening one of the drawers and flipping through the papers, swallowing thickly at some of the agents he'd recognized, ones that had tortured him to no end.

That's when another face caught his eye.

His blood ran cold, flipping through the pages faster, hoping there was some sort of mistake.

It couldn't be.

It was your face, over and over again but under a different name.

Svetlana Petrovitch

"St-Steve?"

"What is it Buck" Steve frowned, seeing the color drain from Bucky's face, taking the file from his hands, his own eyes growing wide.

"Please tell me that isn't her"

"That's y/n" Steve murmured, not understanding where there was a file on you at all, let alone why it was associated with Hydra. Bucky grabbed the filed back before looking at others, his anxiety only getting worse. "Svetlana?"

"These aren't files on those who were taken or held captive. This whole shelf is just for agents who have worked for Hydra throughout the years. They're all Hydra agents"

Bucky needed it to be a mistake, a misprint, a file placed in the wrong section, you were his whole world, you would've told him if you were associated with hydra. His mouth wen dry, clutching onto the papers as he wordlessly made his way back up to find you.

You had been gone all morning, insisting you were just going to grab coffee but now he had his suspicions. You usually always asked him to tag along everywhere but every so often, about every two weeks, you would disappear on your own for hours on end.

He'd also hear you speaking to someone on the phone in hushed whispers but he'd never once questioned it but based on what he'd just seen, he had no idea what to believe.

Who were you.

He tossed the file onto the table as soon as he saw you in the room, the tick in his jaw worrying you. You got up, making your way over to brush his cheek, freezing when he stepped away from your touch as if it would burn him. Everyone left the room, sensing this was a private moment between you both.

"Bucky, is everything okay-

"Where were you"

"I-

"Tell me where you were this morning"

Your heart sank to your stomach, the guilt plastered on your face causing his emotional turmoil to worsen.

"I-I told you I went for coffee" Your shaky voice lacked truth, only confirming his suspicious further.

"Did you work for Hydra?"

"Bucky-

"Y/n, it's a yes or no question, were you a hydra agent or not"

"I-

The fact that you hadn't said no, the fact that you looked guilty, unable to look at him directly in the face was enough to send Bucky over the edge.

"H-how could you?!”

"James, you don't understand!-

"No. No" Bucky shook his head, tears welling in his eyes, his stomach twisting in knots. "Don't. Just don't"

"Baby, please just listen to me-

"Is y/n your name? Hm?" His eyes were red from unshed tears, a part of him still desperately hoping this was all a bad dream. That his girl, the woman he trusted with his entire life, was really who he thought she was, "Or is it Svetlana. You were part of them. You probably still are, is that why you came here? Did you pretend to love me all this time just to get me back to them? Is this what all of our relationship was to you? Find a way to get the Winter Soldier back?"

"Bucky stop!" You cried out, your voice cracking, wiping away at your wet cheeks. You couldn't get a word in as he backed away from you, shaking his head, feeling disgust and confusion at the same time. His heart yearned for you but he wouldn't be able to over come this. "Please-

"There's nothing to listen to. How-how can I ever trust you again" His throat felt like it was being squeezed shut all over again, just like the days Hydra strapped a collar on him to hold him in place every time he was wiped. "I don't even know who you are anymore. I-I love you but I can't-

"Bucky don't do this, just let me explain-

"YOU CAN'T! THERE'S NOTHING FOR YOU TO EXPLAIN!" He snapped, making you flinch back. "You-you could've told me! How am I supposed to trust you?! I've told you my darkest memories and-and fuck, you would've already known, right? This was all a game to you, you would've already known everything I'd ever done. Were you part of that too? Huh? Did you also have a say in all the shit they did to me when I was under their control?"

"NO!" You shook your head, covering your ears, unable to take the words he was saying to you, never in a million years would you ever have done such a thing to the man you loved with your entire being. "Jamie, I would never, I love you, just sit down with me baby, please-

"I'm sorry. We're done. For good. I can't even look at you. You know I love you, fuck, I-do you have any way how much I love you" Bucky's voice dropped to a whisper, moving to softly cup your face in his hands, brushing away at the tears that continued to spill from your lashes. He traced his thumbs along your soft cheeks on last time, his soul feeling like it was being ripped from his body as he dropped his arms back to his sides. "But I can't do this"

He stormed out of the room without looking back leaving you torn, broken and sobbing. You ran past the others who were still worriedly waiting outside and right to your room, locking it, instructing FRIDAY to forbid anyone else from entering.

It didn't take long for you to pack all your things. You didn't have much.

You never did.

You left behind all of Bucky's Henleys that you'd stolen along with all the sweet gifts he'd bought you on your dresser; you figured he wouldn't want to see you anyway.

You had left the compound by that night.

-

Steve signed at the sight of his best friend spending another night destroying himself at the gym, dark red stains covering the leather of the nearly torn punching bag.

"No one knew?" Bucky's voice was hoarse from nights of crying and getting by on coffee and taking out his frustrations out on the gym. He'd stayed in his room for days on end, not speaking to anyone, his head and heart aching. His knuckles were split from how hard he'd been punching the bag, only to be held back by Steve who couldn't stand to see Bucky like this anymore.

"No. None of us knew anything. I spoke to Tony, those files were sent to us directly through SHIELD. When Tony ran his background checks, everything came up clear. There's gotta be more to this Buck. Why don’t you-"

"I loved her" Bucky shook his head, still feeling betrayed over all the things he didn't know. "But I can't"

Weeks went by and Bucky grew more reckless. Not having the love of his life by his side coupled by the fact that there were so many unanswered questions pushed him further and further to the edge. He hated that he still dreamt about you every night, tossing and turning in his cold bed, without you there to keep him safe and warm. You were on his mind every single day and every single part of him wanted to know where you'd gone, how you were doing, guilt starting to eat a him.

He never gave you a chance to explain yourself, jumping at you the second he thought you had strong ties with Hydra, that you were an agent yourself. He'd never even let you get a word in, breaking things off without a second guess.

To make things worse, he'd gone as far as accusing you of also being part of all the pain he'd been put through.

No one knew where you'd gone.

Except Tony.

-

"Just tell me where she is" Bucky ran his hands through his already messy hair, pacing up and down Tony's office while the billionaire sighed. "Please"

"I can't. She asked me not to and I can't break that Barnes. Plus you broke up with her, it's not like she left cause she wanted to"

The guilt that was already eating at him only worsened as he sat down in defeat, angrily wiping his face.

"Is there anything you can tell me? Something? Anything, I'll take anything at this point, I fucked up so badly"

"The most I can do is let you know if she comes back or if she wants to talk to you"

Bucky didn't press the issue more, taking it upon himself to scour the records room again to see if there was anything else on you but he came up short. There were no other files on a person with the last name Petrovitch. He never actually looked through your file properly, feeling too much anxiety from the first time he'd seen it. When he bothered to read it again, there was hardly any information, only having a few fuzzy pictures of you at the base with some other agents as well as how long you'd been there for.

There was one place he'd get his answers from.

SHIELD.

-

"Who is y/n"

"Sargent"

"TELL ME" Bucky's voice nearly shattered the glass, causing Fury to flinch while the others took a step back. After Tony didn't reveal your location, Bucky went straight to the head office, his brooding glare alone getting him instant access to the top floor. The team accompanied him for moral support but also to keep things under control just in case, everyone standing in the directors office on edge. "You kept this from me, from everyone here, I need to know, what does she have to do with Hydra"

Fury sighed, pulling out a thick file from a second safe, dropping it onto the table, shifting through papers before pulling out one of a picture from when you were young. Bucky recognized the twinkling eyes, his heart breaking all over again for the young little girl in the picture, lost and innocent.

How the hell did he think you'd been an agent.

"Y/n, y/l/n. Originally named Svetlana Petrovich by Hydra. Her birth mother had been used as an experiment to procreate more super soldiers in case the serum couldn't be replicated. The serum didn't take so she was rendered useless. Her mother was never seen again. Her supposed father was one of the many soldiers who had been given a different version of what Sargent Barnes has"

Bucky was frozen in place as Fury spoke, feeling absolute agony over the words he's said to you. Your broken face and pleading voice played over and over again, making him nauseous.

"Hydra kept the child in hopes of using training her into a weapon. She was cared for by a woman who was appointed to be her handler. She raised the child differently, without anyone else knowing. Don't ask me how she did it, we don't even have a name"

Everyone continued to listen in stunned silence while he spoke.

"Agent y/l/n wanted to escape but remained at the base to ensure no one hurt the woman who had taken care of her. She didn't go on any missions but she was trained to be one of the strongest soldiers they had, hence the images of her at the base with other Hydra operatives. She remained there until the woman's death and escaped the very same night. We recruited her a few years later"

"How do you know all this and why didn't anyone know" Steve stepped in while Bucky remained silent, trying desperately not to break down. Not only had you been born into the worst situation but you only remained there to protect the one person who was like a mother to you after you lost your own.

"I have my ways, Captain. She didn't want anyone to know. She wasn't proud of the fact that she'd been brought up in such a place. She left it all behind but wanted to use her skills for good. There's a reason she one of your top agents. She didn't learn those skills from just anywhere"

Bucky wordlessly walked out of the room, unable to sit and hear another word. His heart broke for the baby who'd been forced into Hydra's hands without a fighting chance. Yes, you had been raised by someone who wanted to love and care for you but you'd been tortured and trained more than anyone else and after you finally escaped with a life for yourself, he'd accused you of betraying him. He hated that he had come to Fury for answers when he could've just let you speak instead, letting his own anger cloud his judgement. He still didn't know where you'd disappeared to or who you'd be on the phone with but Bucky had to speak to you, no matter what it took.

-

"I'm only giving you her location because she sounds miserable and I'm assuming it's because she misses you. If she pulls a gun my head because of this, its on you" Tony mumbled, scribbling something onto a sheet of paper and stuffing it into Bucky's hand. "You better grovel your ass off"

Bucky couldn't care less about traffic laws as he swerved through the streets to get to you, his motorbike revving through the city till he reached a dingy looking apartment building. He frowned, double checking the address before parking his bike and walking to the lobby. Bucky made his way to the concierge, the man seemingly recognizing him immediately.

"Sargent, I'm assuming you're the boy she's been moping over" The man at the front desk gave him a pointed look, giving him a key and directing him to go to the top floor before he could even say anything. Bucky's cheeks reddened with embarrassment, nodding with a thank you before dashing off to get to you.

As soon as the elevator doors opened, he was surprised to find the peeling and dusty hall way empty with just one door right in the middle. His heart hammered against his chest as he shakily raised his hand to knock. He could hear shuffling on the other side, wiping his palm against his jeans when he hard the lock click open.

"Baby, I'm so sorry I- oh-mam, I'm sorry, I must have the wrong address-“

An elderly woman opened the door, her eyes twinkling as she looked him up and down, taking his metal hand in hers and pulling him inside. Bucky stood in confused silence as he entered the large apartment, which was a stark contrast to the mess it appeared to be on the outside. The interior was sleek; the apartment large enough to take up the entire floor. It made sense why the whole hall only had one door. A large living area was off to the right, decorated with a mix of abstract and modern art; a lot of the pieces reminding him of things that you would paint yourself-

"You must be James" she hummed, taking him into the living room while Bucky's jaw was still hanging, utterly perplexed over where he was. "Let me get your girl"

"My girl?"

Before he could get another word in, the woman disappeared, coming back moments later, dragging you with her. You stood stiffly, refusing to meet his eyes while she huffed, giving you a gentle push towards him.

"Now you both sit and talk" And with that, she left.

"Y/n" Bucky want to fall to his knees and beg you to forgive him, his heart breaking over the way you looked at him like a stranger. The eyes that used to hold so much love, so much spark were now hollow and empty and full of hurt.

"No. You didn't even give me a chance to explain myself Bucky" You kept your voice as steady as you possibly could, your throat already starting to grow painfully tight. You weren't one to cry easily, especially after years of training to repress your emotions but Bucky was your weakness.

"I know. I was wrong, I should've listened to you, it was so wrong of me, I-It's just-I'm not excusing myself, I promise, it's just-I didn't know what to think and I'd always hear you on the phone, sometimes you'd disappear for hours and you wouldn't tell me where, I-I'm sorry I thought the worst when I saw that file. It doesn't change the fact that I didn't let you get a word in. I'm so sorry angel"

You sighed, letting your heart soften. You knew Bucky came with his own baggage of trust issues and while you'd wanted to tell him about the phone calls and visits, you worried about if any of it would make him uncomfortable.

"It was my mother" You whispered, anxiously fidgeting with your fingers, "That's who I'd call and come to see. Well my adoptive mother. Handler. She was like a mother to me"

"But-I thought-" Bucky blinked in confusion, Fury had made it clear the woman had passed before you escaped, "She's alive?"

"I helped her escape with me. We faked her death so they wouldn't come searching for her. She had been captured there to work as a nurse. We changed our names. I didn’t want her living there anymore after I left. This is her place; Tony was nice enough to renovate a penthouse for me without asking questions. Before I joined the team, we'd lay low in cheap rentals. Now I know she's always safe. The concierge is a trained agent"

Bucky felt an inkling of hope when he stepped towards you and you didn't step back. He nervously brought his hand to hold yours, letting out the breath he was holding when you didn't pull away.

"Please forgive me baby, I-I should've given you a chance to explain, I'm so sorry" Bucky squeezed your hand, his thumb coming to brush away the tear that trailed down your cheek.

"You hurt me" You whispered, sniffling. "I'm not upset that you got mad or felt hurt and confused. But you thought I was an agent Bucky. You-you thought I'd do something to hurt you" The last word barely made it out as the first sob escaped. You were able to take Bucky's hurt and confused but no the fact that he'd doubt your love for him, "Did you think I-I didn't love you?"

"No! I shouldn't have said that, I'm sorry baby. For everything. For everything you had to go through, for everything I said. I shouldn't have acted like that. I should have trusted you, I know you love me, no one's ever loved me the way you do doll"

“How could you not trust me. Why didn’t you at least let me explain it to you Bucky”

“I know baby, m'so sorry" Seeing your walls crumble made Bucky's heart ache, his body moving on its own to wrap you in a protective hug. He hated to be the cause of your tears, understanding why you'd been nervous to tell him about your past. Of course you came with your own traumas from Hydra and even though he endured similar things, it still wasn't easy to open up about. "Will you please come back home? You don't have to stay in our room, you don't even have to forgive me, just- please baby"

You melted into his embrace having missed his warmth, his scent, his safe arms.

"I should have told you. I-I was scared-

"Shhh, I understand. You don't have to explain it, m'sorry i didn't know and lashed out. Please come home baby" He whispered against your hair, kissing the top of your head while keeping you pressed to his body. You nodded against his chest, too lost in hugging him back to notice your mother's watery smile or happy sniffles.

"Take me home, Bucky"

-

Of course after you'd come home, Bucky continued to earn your forgiveness, making sure you understood he'd never doubted your feelings for him. He starts to join you as well when you go to visit your mother, blushing when she calls him handsome. Butterflies erupt in his tummy when she give him her blessing while he fidgets with a ring he'd bought, keeping it safely in a velvet box for the right moment.

During vulnerable nights there are times where he needs you to hold him and nights where you need him just as much. He loves that he can comfort and hold you too, letting you pour your heart out when you feel like it or humming soft lullabies till you fall asleep when you don't feel like talking. One thing that is for sure, he'd never push you away from him again. There no one else on this earth that he loves and trusts more than you.

Once again, this version was meant to be trashed so. pls.

[ohbo-ohno]

Serial killer AU and the contrast between how Ghoap treat us and other victims. Maybe they're holding our friend group hostage in the basement, and every day we're forced to see pain and torture of our friends and then Ghost drags us upstairs by our hair and....

The softest pillows ever, Soap helds pur hands so we won't struggle as Simon tortures us with cumming over and over again. We're literally covered in blood, they are covered in blood, and Ghost is so mean with everyone( Soap laughs as our friends struggle against his axe and then covers our face with kisses because we're adorable and he wants us to cry forever((

Scaredy cat whiny wet napkin reader who constantly needs to drink because we cry our daily hydration worth, and we don't really get used to them or fall into Stockholm syndrome, we're just terrified enough to comply with them. It's my favorite dynamic tbh, not just falling in love, but mostly submitting out of fear. Ghost is so soft with us, gots us sweets and vegetables even though Soap is moody because of the lack of meat, because we can't bring ourselves to eat normally after we saw what they did to our friends

🎷🐛

i am fucking LOSING IT

you're so real for preferring scared submission over stockholm syndrome btw. stockholm syndrome can be fun but something about complying only because you're scared... it's so delicious...

also... soap wanting meat... if any of you want a cannibal ghostsoap apocalypse au go read this it's sooo good. ghost kidnaps soap and takes him back to his cannibal compound to keep him :( it's written as a love story from ghost's perspective and a horror story from soap's lol it's great

anyways more about serial killer ghoap below the cut :) listened to bilgewater by brown bird while writing this if any of y'all like gothic country music

soap torturing someone with you in the room (because he hates letting you out of his sight) and he keeps taking breaks to come comfort you and gives you kisses IM :((( wipes your tears away and gets streaks of red all over your face, wants to fuck you cause you look so pretty but his victims don't deserve to see you that vulnerable, that's just for him and simon. ties you up in the corner so you don't run, maybe locks you in a little cage (i will put petplay into everything i write like god has challenged me to it personally). gags you because you get real scream-y and tend to beg for their lives, but sometimes has to tug it out so you can throw up :( tells you to close your eyes when he does something particularly nasty, the gore and your terror in the corner nearly enough to get him off without even touching his dick

being soft with you is like their reward to themselves for torturing people so well lmfao. like, they did so good making those people's last moments agonizing and now they get to cuddle up with you <3 washes off their hands and your face, bundles you up real close to them, gets to lay in all the nice soft warmth now.

ghost is so so tender when washing you off (when he doesn't want you covered in blood - sometimes he leaves it for hours, until it flakes off and you nearly scratch it away until you bleed). he's cooing to you while brushing a soft washcloth over you face, humming a little and saying things like you were such a good girl for us. such good bait, led our toys right to us, thank you so much, doll. look so good covered in their blood, wanna paint you with it sometime. that sound nice to you? no? ok, ok, deep breaths, honey, calm down. just relax for me, you're safe. gonna be real sweet to you now, you don't have to be scared anymore.

and they are sweet. place you on a mattress covered in the softest most plush blankets you've ever seen. they set a little stuffed animal in your arms, let you curl around it and hide your face in it. they know it makes you feel better, and they're nice enough to let you hide your face from them for now :( content themselves with pulling you right up into them (making you hold the stuffed animal when they kill people, look at you all smiley and say make sure he doesn't get dirty, baby, picks it up out of a pool of blood and tsks at you all disappointed, tell you to clean him and say gentle, like we are with you whey you get too rough)

actually can't stop thinking about this au it's like a curse