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waywardnewcomer · 4 years ago

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Built-in Best Friends Part Eight

A/N: So, it’s like 1am where I live and technically my hiatus has started but I wanted to leave you with one last fic. I will be back writing 1st July. Enjoy!

Summary: Y/N is broken, Tom is the only one who can fix her. But does he do more harm than good?

Warnings: descriptive depression, descriptive anxiety, descriptive panic attack, lots of sadness

Pairings: Reader x Tom Padalecki, Tom x OC, Reader x OC, Jensen x Daughter!Reader, Danneel x Daughter!Reader

Word Count: 1.9k

Previous Part Series Masterpost Masterlist

You hadn’t left your room since that night almost 3 weeks ago. Your parents had been collecting your work, but you hadn’t done any of it. You barely had enough energy to get out of bed on a morning and it was an achievement if you ate that day. You had slipped back into a deep hole and you could barely get a moment to breathe let alone dig yourself out. You tried baby steps, a shower one day, looking at your work the next, joining your family for a meal a couple days later and you were getting there, but it was a hard journey. Your heart had been broken by the most important person to you in the world, and more importantly he had physically hurt you.

You looked in the mirror at your dull face, void of any life and hair greasy and messy as it hadn’t been washed in days. You placed your fingers over the skin which used to be black and blue and now a faded yellow colour and eyed your window out of the corner of your eye. Your Dad had been so pissed when he saw the bruise, he almost stormed next door to punch Tom himself. Your Mom had to restrain him while you cried into JJ’s arms. You had barely spoken to any of them since.

Every day you heard your Mom come check on you in the morning, kissing you on the head softly as you pretended to sleep. At lunch time one of your parents brought some food and left it on your desk, pleading for you eat, giving you a hug and leaving you to it. Around 4pm Arrow and Zep climbed into your bed and cuddled up to you, making you watch a movie until dinner time. Dinner time was spent with JJ watching your every move from the chair in the corner of your room. At night your Dad laid in bed with you, rubbing circles on your back as you cried for the umpteenth time that day and played with your hair, just holding you to his chest and pleading for you to feel better. You knew they were worried, you worried yourself, but you couldn’t bring yourself to reassure them. How can you tell them you’ll be fine when you didn’t even know that yourself? Everyday was a mystery and you had never felt so low in your life.

You knew Tom had been trying to come see you. You heard the shouting and hushed whispering from down the stairs, JJ telling you about the letters and presents he had left for you to say sorry. A couple times he had tried knocking on your window until your Dad boarded it up with cardboard whenever he was home. You and Tom had never argued this bad. You had spats here and there but never a big blow out. It was the longest you had not spoken to him.

As bad as it sounded you knew the only thing that would bring you out of this funk was him. He could always ground you. That’s why you didn’t surprise yourself when you took down the cardboard on the window, put the window on the latch and knocked on the wall. You needed your best friend no matter what he had done to you. He was your lifeline.

Tom crawled through your window with a lot of hesitation, just looking at you with a very sorrowful and questioning glance as you looked at him from your bed, tears already accumulating in your eyes.

“Hi,” He whispered, finally coming into the threshold and standing opposite you.

“Tom,” You breathed, tears already running down your face and he rushed to your side just like old times and just held you in his chest as you let it out.

You could hear him join in crying with you and whispering ‘I’m sorry’ over and over. You took comfort in his warm chest, his heartbeat bringing your brain back to a level of reality you had been unable to reach. You slowly felt yourself crawling your way back to the surface, just from seeing his face again. You pulled away and put some distance between you and avoided looking him in the eyes.

“Y/N look at me.”

“I want to be able to look at you and not feel so hurt by you but I can’t forgive you yet Tom, you hurt me in more ways than one.” You whispered, voice cracking slightly with emotion.

“I know, and I swear I will make it up to you. I’m so sorry Peach. I never wanted to hurt you.” He smiled sadly at you and rubbed your arm. He grabbed your hand and rubbed circles on the back of your hand softy, calming your hitching breath and slowing your tears.

“I just needed you to bring me back, I was slipping too far,” You mumbled guiltily. “I’m sorry.”

“You never have to be sorry for that. I will always be here for you, no matter if you decide to not forgive me or you do. I love you Peach. I care about you. I want to look after you.” He spoke earnestly looking into your eyes making you nod tearfully.

“I know and I love you for it Tommy, I just need to heal a little.”

“I know. I don’t expect forgiveness that easily, I haven’t even forgiven myself yet. I don’t think my parents have either. Take all the time you need, and I’ll be here waiting.” He spoke softly making you smile a little for the first time in weeks. “Does this mean you’ll come back to school?”

“Yes, but please keep your distance. Just for a little while.” You pleaded making him nod sadly.

“If that’s what you want,” He sniffed, trying not to start crying again. “I better go.”

You nodded and gave him a quick hug, pulling your hand away from his and watching as he crawled back out of your window. Your chest finally had the weights lifted off it and you felt a thousand times lighter.

That night was the first night you didn’t cry yourself to sleep. You and your Dad had a conversation about your futures, and you felt at peace. You had even eaten breakfast with your family the next morning and allowed your Mom to drive you to school. She promised she would pick you up if it felt too much which you were thankful for, but you were determined to get back to normal.

You were met by Penny and Lily waiting for you at the gates. Zach and Josh were lingering behind a little, knowing you may need space but ready to step in at any moment. You gave them both a quick hug and word of thanks for asking about you throughout your time off and immediately felt more at ease around your friends. You gave Josh a little side glance and nodded to the girls. They took Zach across the campus while Josh edged towards you.

“I’m sorry.” He spoke immediately. “If I knew you didn’t like it, I would’ve stopped. I didn’t want to fight with Tom, I know he’s your best friend. I’ve missed you Y/N. Fuck, I can barely explain the hell these few weeks have felt without seeing your face, but I know I deserve it. I will do anything for your forgiveness.”

“Josh.” You chuckled at his fast paced voice hitching with his breathing. “I forgive you. You didn’t do anything wrong I just needed some space.”

“Thank god.” He whispered going to kiss you, but you turned your head causing him to kiss your cheek. The look he gave you saddened your soul, but you knew it wasn’t fair to keep leading him on. You saw Tom with Sasha out the corner of your eye and saw his hurt look but couldn’t bring yourself to maintain eye contact.

“I can’t be with you. I’m in love with Tom. I thought I could get over it, but I can’t. I like you. I really do. But you’re not him, you know?” You spoke making him nod with understanding, the kicked puppy look not leaving his face.

“Friends?”

“Always.” You smiled and pulled him in for a hug tightly, kissing his cheek softly. You felt multiple arms wrap around the two of you and laughed as you were engulfed in a group hug.

“There’s a school talent show this lunch Y/N please come! It will be fun, a lot of crappy singers and rubbish comedians for us to laugh at.” Zach smiled nudging you slightly as you had pulled away from the huddle.

“How can I resist that?” You laughed softly giving him a side hug and allowing him to wrap his arm around your waist as you walked to class. You couldn’t be gladder you had found friends like these.

When lunch rolled around you couldn’t shake this odd feeling in the pit of your stomach. It was like a precursor to a panic attack which you really did not want to happen in front of the whole school. You persuaded your friends to let you sit on the end of the row for easy leaving access and tried to calm down, seeing Sasha a few rows ahead keep giving you dirty looks. What the hell was her problem?

After a couple of crappy singers and a surprisingly funny comedian you started to relax a little, the feeling never really leaving but you forced it back down to the deepest pit. Until you heard Tom’s name over the announcer. You knew he could sing but never thought he would do it in front of the school, it wasn’t his style.

“I want to dedicate this song to the only one I’ll ever love, my person. This is before you go.”

As he started strumming his guitar and noticed him lock eye contact with you, you felt your friends eyes all immediately turn to you. Surely, he was looking at Sasha a couple rows ahead of you, but she turned to give you a sneer, so it seemed unlikely. But surely, he couldn’t be talking about you, could he?

“When you hurt under the surface, like troubled water running cold. Well, time can heal, but this won't,”

You felt your eyes prickle with tears, your breath hitch in your throat as it started to dry out and close. You looked at him, looking at you and tilted your head softly, barely flinching when Penny gripped your had from beside you.

“Was there something I could've said to make it all stop hurting? It kills me how your mind can make you feel so worthless.”

He gave you a sad smiled from the stage as he sang the song making your body clench up and your grip onto Penny’s hand suddenly tightened as your hands went clammy.

“Our every moment, I start to replay, but all I can think about is seeing that look on your face.”

You looked down as the tears started to fall, the world beginning to feel as if it was swimming around you. You were losing touch with reality and you knew you were only seconds from starting to hyperventilate with a full blown panic attack.

“Would we be better off by now if I'd have let my walls come down? Maybe, I guess we'll never know, you know, you know.”

You could barely hear the lyrics anymore as the feeling of your heartbeat and breathing filled your ears like a drum. You let the tears flow freely and your grip slackened on Penny’s hand as your vision slipped away from you, making your path a blurry mess. You barely trusted your legs as you hurtled yourself out of that hall but all you could think was that you had to leave. You needed to get out of there.

Next Part

Tags: @yoursmilemakesmeloveyou @colie87 @atlas-of-the-world @duckieburns @biawol @maralisa124 @gabriels-trix @the-winchesters-impala-blog @letmebeyoursforever @rosie-winchester @bellero @dreaminemz @aomi-nabi @sebstanismyman @captured-memory @thatbandchick39@thevelvetseries

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waywardnewcomer · 5 years ago

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Built in Best Friends Part Four

A/N: Sorry this took so long, for a while there this story became my own life and I had my heart broken. It was hard to relive it all, but I’m finally over it, I hope you enjoy my pain.

Summary: Tom gets a new girlfriend and becomes a dick.

Warnings: Tom is a dick. Very angsty

Pairings: Reader x Tom Padalecki, Tom x OC, Jensen x Daughter!Reader, Danneel x Daughter!Reader, Jensen x Daneel

Word Count: 1.3k

Previous Part Series Masterpost Masterlist

The next time you even got a whiff of a party buzz going around the school you encouraged Tom to go, not wanting him to miss out on his teenage years. You, however, were never going to have normal teenage years because anxiety plagued your bones. You helped him get ready and left him to his own devices on the promise he gave you the low down the next day. It took everything in you not to check up on him and text him that night. It was his night of fun. You couldn’t burden him like you always did. Instead you had a family movie night and an early night, spending some much needed time with your siblings.

The next morning it barely hit 9am when Tom burst through your bedroom door and jumped on your bed to wake you up, laying in the space beside you.

“Do you have a death wish Padalecki?” You hissed at him eyes still tightly shut.

“Come on Y/N it’s 9am, don’t you want to hear about my steamy kiss with Sasha?” He laughed making you shoot up. “That got your attention.” He smirked.

“You kissed her?” You asked, ignoring the sickly feeling in the pit of your stomach.

“Yup, and it gave me butterflies. Swarms of them Y/N!” He gushed making you feel guilty for being jealous while he was so happy.

“That’s brilliant Tom!” You forced out, smiling tightly.

“We’re going on a date this afternoon, soo I need you to help me pick out an outfit? Pretty please with cherries on top.” He begged making you giggle.

“Fine, only if it will be worth my time afterwards.” You laughed at his puppy face.

“Pizza and Disney marathon tomorrow?” He asked and you nodded.

Hearing about Sasha made your heart clench and every day you realised how stupid you were for falling for your best friend. He was heart-wrenchingly happy, it was a completely bittersweet feeling towards your best friend. If that wasn’t bad enough when he finally asked her out, you felt sick to your stomach. Then he started to drive her to school and she had to sit in the front, or she’d throw a bitch fit and toss you a dirty look. Then she sat with you two at lunch constantly giving you disgusted looks as you joked with Tom. You started seeing Tom less and less because he was always with her.

“It worries me Tom, I get that she’s your girlfriend but what if I have a panic attack and I need you and you’re not there? What if you’re with her?” You asked him one night, tearing up a little at the thought.

“Y/N listen to me. You’re my best friend, nothing will ever change that. You come first. Always.” He spoke, grabbing the sides of your head and looking into your eyes. Didn't really help with the whole crush thing either.

But little by little the strong bond between you two began to break. He wasn’t always there for you when you needed a little reassurance or pick me up. You turned to your family instead, but it would never be the same as your best friend. Your parents began tossing you worried looks whenever you came to them with the problem knowing they were never your first port of call, ever since you could talk it was Tom. It was always Tom.

You hit a breaking point when you sat down at your usual lunch table and he wasn’t there. You looked around nervously, you didn’t have any other friends and you couldn’t eat in front of all these people alone. Then you spotted him. Sat at the table with the jocks and his cheerleader girlfriend laughing not even looking over at your sad face. You quickly texted him asking if he was going to join you, to see him take his phone out look at the text and put it back in his pocket as if it was nothing. That was the stinger. You almost ran out of the cafeteria and into the library a quiet space you could collect your thoughts and focus on not crying.

“Psst.” You heard someone whisper making you look up around you, eyes locking on a brunette girl passing you a note. You recognised her as Penny from your French class and gave her a smile.

You okay? You look kinda lonely and upset.

Just friend issues, thank you for asking. You wrote on the slip of paper and passed it back.

Wanna get out of here? You looked up at her and nodded softly.

She led you to a picnic bench outside and got out her lunch and some notes from one of her classes and smiled at you.

“Look, I know what it’s like to feel lonely. I don’t have many friends around here and the ones I do have are in lunchtime detention.” She rolled her eyes making you giggle. “But you don’t have to be, you’re always welcome to hang out with me.”

“Thanks Penny, it means a lot.” You smiled at her gratefully and got out your lunch taking little nibbles, feeling weirdly comfortable around her already.

“Anytime.” She smiled. You spent the rest of lunch getting to know Penny and hearing stories about her troublesome friends making you laugh harder than you have in a while.

Although he had hurt you, you were looking forwards to seeing Tom at the end of the day so you could confront him about lunch. However, standing outside the front of school for the past 20 minutes wasn’t looking good. You texted him only to be left on read, making you sigh in frustration. He would feel your wrath when you got a hold of him. You looked at the time and sighed knowing your parents would still be working at the brewery so ringing them for a lift wasn’t an option and all of the buses had left 10 minutes earlier. You had no other option but to walk and it looked like the skies were about to open. Lucky you.

You finally arrived home half an hour later soaked to the bone and sniffling slightly. You slammed the door and dripped water all over the floor making your parents look up at you from where they had just sat down.

“Why are you dripping? You need to get out of those clothes before you get sick.” Your Mom asked sounding worried, rushing to get you a towel.

“Didn’t Tom give you a lift?” Your Dad asked confused.

“He didn’t show so I texted him and got left on read.” You grumbled.

“That’s not like Tom, maybe he wrote the message and forgot to press send. Something must have come up.” Your Mom said thoughtfully.

“He did the same at lunch to.” You mumbled.

“He left you at lunch? He knows how anxious you get eating around people!” Your Dad grumbled angrily. “Did you eat?” He asked you a little softer, looking in your miserable eyes.

“Yeah I sat with a girl from my French class called Penny. She looked after me, don’t worry.” You flashed a fake smile at them that clearly didn’t meet your eyes.

“That’s not the point, Tom shouldn’t have left you.” Your Mom pointed out.

“I’m not his child, he doesn’t have to do anything. Plus, his girlfriend is his first priority.” You sighed making your parents raise their eyebrows. “Now I’m gonna go shower I am freezing.” You mumbled making your way up the stairs and missing the way your parents stared after you sadly.

After your shower you began to feel more and more angry with Tom. You felt like you deserved an explanation, he had left you twice today and potentially going to make you sick. You saw his shadow behind his curtains on his bed watching TV so you knocked on the wall and waited for him to come over. After 5 minutes and still no sign of him you knocked again and furrowed your brows, usually he came over in a flash. Especially when you knocked, it was your secret code. You heard your phone ping and as you looked at the message you felt your heart break a little inside.

Busy. Leave me alone.

Next Part

BIBF Series Tags: @yoursmilemakesmeloveyou @colie87 @atlas-of-the-world @duckieburns @biawol @maralisa124 @gabriels-trix @the-winchesters-impala @letmebeyoursforever @rosie-winchester @bellero @dreaminemz @aomi-nabi @babygurl224221@sebstanismyman @captured-memory @thatbandchick39

Forever Tags (people who have asked, let me know if you want adding) @creativedogs @a-magey @natashacamillaus @platonic-plots @captainsherlockwinchester110283 @sleepylunarwolf @claitynroberts @theshortegg @casiskween @robfangirl @fanficwithasideofcanon @jaremish @mlovesstories @lauren-novak @hi-my-name-is-riley @spn-tw-37 @spnrelatedurl @phonegalhelp @springholland @the-hufflepuff-hunter @chonisberonica @coralphantomninja @therealmrshale

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