#this week will be session 5. I’m. unconvinced this did anything except cost me almost 400€ total
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#me.txt#this is exactly what happened at my last job#the perspective became so horrendous I ended up quitting instead of trying#the problem here is that I have no job to fall back on#and I’m not about to find one if I can’t even fucking update my goddamn cv#or look at job offers without crying and lowkey wanting to off myself#this is. a problem. that is. i am the problem.#it’s a week and a day to break but it’s like. starting to be put into question whether I can get there without exploding mid flight#the problem ofc is that even if I do break apart. it’ll just be via pathetic work presentation and bad quality work#which is just kinda sad and pathetic#on brand at least#I’m not feeling better I’m in fact feeling worse but I’m also not fucking doing what the therapist said to do so#I just. cant come up with two nice activities per day#going back to bed maybe. that’s all I can think of rn.#I need to work out what I’ll tell her.#rn all I have is the absolute bleakness of existence. nothing to look forward to ever#just the same day or worse#and worst of all: me whining about it. again. always.#this week will be session 5. I’m. unconvinced this did anything except cost me almost 400€ total#but whatever eh
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