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kinetic-elaboration · 2 years ago

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September 29: Archivist Mina

@justbecauseyoubelievesomething mentioned me in her reblog of this post but I think my thoughts are going to get rambly and OT so I’m making a separate post instead of adding on directly. I love the OP! It’s very interesting and very timely for me.

To start, I’ll say I’m not an archivist. I work in a library and part of my job involves assisting with the library’s digital archive. I helped keep the archive afloat when the position primarily responsible for its upkeep was vacant for 2.5 long (COVID) years, and now I work with the librarian who’s taken over the job, mostly adding items in certain categories to keep everything up to date, rather than, like, overseeing, or making policy decisions, or doing big-picture stuff. Most of what I work with in this sense are born digital items, or items that were created basically simultaneously in identical print and digital formats. I say all this for context so I don’t appear to overstate my expertise, but do make clear my interest!

Further, archives, especially physical archives, are a big topic of conversation in my department right now. We have many, many boxes of the papers of a former Dean, which came to us before the pandemic, and then sat in limbo for, again, about 2 years. The main person working on them both before and after that hiatus was a student, who has since graduated. Now that we’ve gotten word we might be getting the complete papers of another person, the sense of urgency around this first set of papers has increased. Relevant context here (yes, this the OT part is getting more OT): the papers were not organized by the person who created them. As far as we can tell, he died unexpectedly, and his family packed up his office. Then, owing to some confusion re: which library the papers were meant for, they sat in the wrong one for years. Afaik that library didn’t reorganize them or do anything with them at all, but at any rate their current organization is simultaneously long-standing and arbitrary. It’s not sacred, it’s not related in any way to the person’s wishes for his papers--how they were to be presented, etc.--but at the same time, the papers have been organized like this for a long time, and who is to say that a new organizational scheme would be better? Like, we are going to make changes to some degree, but there is an instinct to preserve the boxes as much as possible in the arrangement we were given.

Again, to be clear about my expertise here, I’m working on this project in a fairly limited worker-bee capacity. I’m not in charge, more taking it as a learning opportunity. At the same time, even the simplest tasks, in theory, become much less simple when you actually open a box and deal with the physical materials.

The ultimate goal is to make the materials usable for researchers. They should be organized in such a way that one can take a clean, neat, curated list of items and know what the items are and where to find them, and understand why certain items are with other items within each folder, and within each box.

So. To get back to Dracula, my point with all of this is: there is a lot of information present in the organization of materials. They can be basically useless, or extremely helpful, depending on what structure (or lack of structure) underlies their arrangement.

That’s what Mina is experiencing. She has a lot of information, and she’s getting more and more all the time, but it’s siloed and disorganized. That’s not even going into the multiple formats, and the inaccessibility of shorthand or phonograph records, or that most of her documents exist only in one copy (before she gets her hands on them of course). Further, putting everything together in one place is only so helpful if you have to read it all separately. Then you’d have all the pieces of the puzzle, but they wouldn’t fit together into a clear picture. As she says today (9/29), “In this matter dates are everything, and I think that if we get all our material ready, and have every item put in chronological order, we shall have done much.”

In organizing the Dean’s papers, it’s more important to put like with like: all his correspondence with Justice X, all his writings on topic Y. For Mina, everything is already arranged like-with-like, in a way: all of Seward’s diary recordings, all of Jonathan’s diary entries, all of Lucy’s correspondence and writings, etc. What she needs is to cut up all the bits, as it were, and arrange them in the order in which they were created, to turn them into a chronological narrative. What was happening simultaneously to what? And what can a chronological story tell her and her friends about the Count’s movements and his ultimate plan? As Jonathan says (9/29) when he looks over Dracula’s lawyer’s papers, “It gave me almost a turn to see again one of the letters which I had seen on the Count's table before I knew of his diabolical plans. Everything had been carefully thought out, and done systematically and with precision. He seemed to have been prepared for every obstacle which might be placed by accident in the way of his intentions being carried out. To use an Americanism, he had "taken no chances," and the absolute accuracy with which his instructions were fulfilled, was simply the logical result of his care.” Only by seeing the papers in the right context can he begin to understand them, and then much becomes exquisitely clear.

What’s especially interesting to me is that Stoker’s arrangement of Dracula is NOT chronological. But the Dracula Daily experience IS. Many people have commented on how that changes the experience. In a way, it brings clarity, as Mina hoped it would. It takes out much of the mystery of the narrative. But, because we’re ALSO reading in real time, it ups the suspense.

For example, if you read about the Demeter’s arrival in Whitby first, you would probably be, yes, horrified, but also confused. Why is the ship behaving oddly? Oh, Dracula must have been here, but, why did the Captain die as he did? How did these events play out? The eventual inclusion of the Captain’s log entries provides answers. NOW it makes sense. NOW we see the previous events in a different life. We have the ending already, so there’s not much suspense in the logs. They’re just a quick summary, in a way, that fills in previously puzzling blanks.

In the Dracula Daily order, of course, there is no mystery. We hear the Count is going to England on a ship, we hear about his journey on the ship, we watch the ship come ashore. The ship in Whitby harbor acts as we expect it to act. The sight on board is horrific but exactly what we anticipated. The SUSPENSE, though, throughout the tail is much higher. The Captain’s story is parceled out day by day. We experience the exact pace at which the Count stalks his prey, the agonizing slowness with which the Captain comes to understand what is happening. His story ends in a semi-cliffhanger, his death inevitable, but not yet seen. And then more waiting until the full horror is revealed and that inevitable ending confirmed.

In some ways, I’ve felt that the daily reading is closer to experiencing what the characters do, because my pace is a reader is the same as their pace in their lives. But, except for the early days of Jonathan’s diary standing alone, I have a vastly different perspective in another critical way: I see everyone’s experiences at once. The experience of Dracula for the characters in Dracula is one of confusion and mystery. Much that puzzles them is clear from the start to me. I have the ability to put the different narratives together, including the newspapers clippings and other context-giving documents, without any effort at all. I see the larger picture.

That’s what Mina is trying to give her friends: a coherent, big picture view. As I and other Dracula Daily-ers know, this makes a big difference and greatly increases one’s clarity, even if nothing (short of binging the whole story from the perspective of the aftermath) could lessen the suspense of building terror.

OP’s point was more about the format of the archived work: how Mina makes the shorthand diaries and the phonograph accessible by making them into typewritten sheets of paper, and increases their availability by making copies. I think it’s a very interesting point that she not just incidentally but perhaps PURPOSEFULLY also flattens the works by this process. Much of what made them unique artifacts is gone: Jonathan’s handwriting, Seward’s voice. Information you might glean from their way of preserving their thoughts is gone. It’s really important, actually, that Jonathan wrote in shorthand! That’s (possibly) how he evaded having his secret, written thoughts and plans read by Dracula. It’s also something he shared with his now-wife; I got the distinct impression from Mina that shorthand is something special between them. And then of course, there’s the special, unique, un-duplicatable nature of the original-as-original. The little cylinders, neatly arranged, that Mina carefully describes. The diary that Jonathan touched with his own hands, that he kept on his person through a harrowing journey, that he offered to Mina and she carefully sealed with her wedding ring on the day they married. If Jonathan were a real person, and his diary were in a library somewhere, how many Dracula Daily readers would like the opportunity to go and visit it, perhaps gently page through it? Even though, or perhaps especially because, we came to read it most recently and/or first in emails sent to our computers and phones? Yes, there would be more information there: did his hand shake when he wrote such-and-such an entry? Did his handwriting change over time? But there’s also emotion. It’s a meaningful object. This is why we simultaneously digitize old, rare books and keep them safely in special collections within libraries or archival spaces, instead of just throwing them away when we’ve got our e-copy all set.

Tl;dr on this last point, I 100% agree with OP. Mina is an extremely practical person who does not hesitate to open her own and her husband’s private writings to public, or at least group, scrutiny if doing so serves a greater purpose: destroying the Evil that threatens her city, almost killed her husband, did kill her close friend. But she’s also the woman who sealed her husband’s diary with her wedding ring. I don’t think she would want Van Helsing, Seward, Arthur pawing through it, taking in at length all of the little details that make this a unique and personal object. This is the compromise she offers Seward as well: no one will hear your heart beat, but they will read your story presented in a dispassionate and neutral format in order to glean information from it.

To tie the two points together: her ‘Dracula archives’ are created for a specific purpose and this is apparent in BOTH the format she chooses for them AND the organization. She wants to destroy Dracula. So, she puts together all the known facts into one collection: chronologically arranged, type-written, mostly duplicate copies. As a result, the overarching story is as clear as possible, facts are consistently emphasized over emotion, and distracting and/or personal details are stripped.

One could say that this last is a coincidence, that this is a loss she’s willing to live with to increase accessibility. This is the case with, for example, adding transcriptions to audio and video files online, something else I’m working on currently and coincidentally had a long discussion about today. Obviously, transcriptions increase accessibility, allowing people who can’t hear to gain access to the content being preserved. They can also provide additional information, like clarifying an unknown or hard to understand word. And they’re more easily searchable. Finally, the transcript is another copy of the item: should the original become corrupted or lost, or the means to play it become obsolete, you still have the transcript. The best way to preserve anything is to have multiple copies in multiple places, and, if possible, multiple formats. But transcriptions aren’t perfect: you lose tone of voice, you lose the visual aspect even if some parts are described in addition to dialogue transcription--plus, even the most faithful transcription does involve some degree of ‘editing,’ i.e. the transcriber making choices about just what that unclear word was or how to split up paragraphs or how to present or format the transcription.

But I don’t think these are concerns of Mina’s. Again, OP’s point is fascinating: to her, these are all pros. She IS an editor, she IS making conscious choices about format and organization, and she LIKES the consequences of these choices, even when they involve, in a sense, loss.

(All of this is assuming she isn’t actively cutting out sections of the diary, which I suppose she could be, but I don’t see any particular evidence of that. She keeps many details she could have cut for privacy reasons, so, why would she cut other things? It makes more sense to me to say that the missing/implied parts, like more concrete evidence that Jonathan was fed upon, are missing because the original writer was not able or willing to include them. Also, personally, I find this, the possibility of Mina censoring content specifically, an uninteresting question simply because--well this is a novel, it’s not real, so if she “edited” out a portion it truly does not exist. So it’s a hypothetical that is impossible to spin out very far. It just becomes purely speculative at that point.)

#the year 2022 #2022: reading #ah there's a lot of ramble in here i am so sorry

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morgana-ren · 3 years ago

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if you'd be so inclined my dear, what are your thoughts on how Tomura's character has developed over the series' timeline? -☼

So, I think Horikoshi did an excellent job at character development- especially considering that he's a villain (not the focal point of the series) and he really didn't have to do that. He easily could have kept Tomura an impudent little man-child, but he didn't, and I truly appreciate that.

So, in season one, we get his debut as USJ, and it became quickly apparent that he was... disorganized. Intelligent and dangerous, clearly, but not quite there yet. He essentially threw money at a pack of sell-sword villains, had a basic plan for how he wanted things to go, and relied on his Nomu to do the majority of his work for him. He didn't even consider variables and other things he couldn't have foreseen- he took Master at his word and just went for it.

He makes a multitude of mistakes during this attack, and it's part of why he fails so hard. Underestimates the kids simply because they're young, not factoring in that these are to be the nations top heroes. Even young, each one is sporting a power that puts them at the top of the class and above the rest of the nation. He basically goes "Fuck it, just scatter them and have these no-name villains kill them. No way that could go wrong." not considering that these children have been learning from the best of the best and are clearly already intelligent of their own accord.

He doesn't take into account that these heroes actually care for these kids and that feeling responsible for them works in their favor as opposed to being a detriment. They fight harder and take more abuse to keep them protected (Aizawa getting absolutely demolished but still persisting to defend the children even as he bleeds to death with a broken body.)

The intel wasn't wrong, per se, but he took it at face value, not even bothering to consider that All Might would push far past his limit to keep these kids safe. For someone as obsessed with felling All Might, he certainly didn't really know a thing about him. His genuine goodness and character would not allow him to fail when their lives were on the line. And then there's the matter of Midoriya, and while Tomura had no way of knowing that he's inherited All Might's power, he should have been able to account for wild cards like that from valiant children dedicated to heroism.

More under the cut because I’m just rambling.

I think this defeat humbles him. For most of his life, things have gone his way because of who is backing him and because he is extremely dangerous with a powerful quirk- this teaches him that raw strength and basic strategy won't be enough.

He watches Stain take the country by storm, and he can't understand it. Doesn't get what the big deal is- he believes he and Stain are mostly cut from the same cloth because of their penchant for violence and murdering heroes, totally blind to the convictions behind Stain's actions. He's incapable of thinking outside of his own view points, and it cripples him. These are his first few steps outside of his own comfort zone and where he begins to grow.

He's forced to consider not what he wants, but why. He resists this every step of the way, but ultimately realizes that paying off little bastard villains to work in his name isn't enough. He needs players under his command that will fight for more than money- and sell swords are loyal to nothing but that. He needs to find a conviction (even as he ends up stealing the mask of one and using it as a facade at first) that others can relate to and be passionate about.

So he does.

He steals Stain's ideology for his own and uses it to recruit some of his top members- even if he is a right little bastard about it at first. While he throws a tizzy fit because they aren't "perfect" (his standards are very high despite the fact that he's arguably not a very effective leader) but eventually ends up utilizing them regardless.

It's around here that he starts sharpening his instincts and learns what it is to be a true leader. He learns he cannot casually throw around his pawns because ultimately, he cannot win this war by himself. 'The enemy of my enemy is my friend' and while he isn't as enchanted with Stain's entire gimmick as his comrades are, he still wields it effectively.

He's still learning, however, as we learn when he takes Bakugo. Had he gone to the effort to get to know a single thing about him, he would have learned very quickly that trying to recruit him would come up completely pointless. He just saw untamed anger and unrestrained violence bordering on unhinged and thought "Ah yes, he's powerful and very much like me- he'll do nicely" and put together a whole plan to kidnap him. I think the vanguard's success in capturing him shows Tomura just how useful it is to have clever little birds under your command, and that sticks with him.

Losing his Master, like AFO says, forces him to become his own man. He loses the cushy abode he'd had for most of his life, loses many of the benefits afforded to him by being AFO's protege. He and his ragtag team of villains live in squalor, almost entirely destitute, and are forced to survive- but they stay loyal, and that means something to him. I think it’s around here where he actually begins to care about them.

We see how he reacts to Magne’s death. I don’t think for one second he aided in destroying Overhaul simply because he was a threat. If that was the case, he would have stopped once he was arrested. He risks everything to get vengeance. Cuts his limbs off and renders him completely helpless as payment for what he did to Compress and to avenge Magne’s wrongful death.

Over the course of everything, he’s become more patient, more cunning, more dangerous. He’s learning quickly from his mistakes, how to command his ranks in a respectful, effective way, and how to keep them safe. He learns their strengths and weaknesses, and while he’s still a bit thorny, it’s very apparent he does care for them. He’s on his own now, and knows he needs greater power, greater numbers to achieve his goals. He is ruthlessly ambitious, willing to endure ungodly amounts of pain to meet his ends.

So now we have this season (which I haven’t actually watched, as I’m just waiting for disappointment because I fucking know Bones won’t do him justice) and he’s seeking out both Gigantomachia, a former ally, and the PLF. Both things that could be of great value to him. His leadership skills and ability to command will be put to the test, but so will his endurance, his willpower, and everything else. This is the beginning of him as a truly devastating threat.

He’s growing into the villain I think he deserves to be. He’s facing down the very bones that comprise him and learning why he is the way he is. What his convictions really are and how far he’s willing to go to achieve his goals. HIs past, his life as he knows it, what needs to be done to put a pretty little ribbon on everything. He is, in a way, shedding like a snake- ridding himself of weaknesses, growing into his strengths, and evolving into a more capable predator.

If you ask me, realistically, I think Shigaraki would actually win. When it’s all said and done, I think his arc is far more compelling than any of the heroes or their children. I think he has more drive, more wit, more raw power and more reasons to keep fighting. A lot of the kids, while cute and the main characters, are quite hollow. But over the course of all these seasons, we get to watch Tomura’s metamorphosis and his evolution into a purer, undiluted evil. He transforms into something truly sinister- a literal manifestation of all of the flaws and pitfalls of society and hero culture as it exists. He is undeniable proof of the toxicity and that the way things are cannot be allowed to stand, and the fact that so many people resonate with him and follow him loyally should be the ultimate clue-in.

I think if the heroes weren’t blinded, they would look at Shigaraki and his league and consider it. Wonder if, just for a moment, there was something there that they should pay attention to. A cry that they should hear rather than be willing deaf to. But they don’t.

Gran Torino is a prime example of this. So are all the other so called ‘heroes’. Calling him evil. Underestimating him. Considering him someone who just woke up one day and decided ‘I don’t like this so I’m going to kill a lot of people’. You’d think that they’d recognize that a drive like his does not come from nothing. If they sat down, shut the fuck up and listened for ten seconds, maybe they wouldn’t be dying by the dozens.

I’m not saying that they should allow him to continue to trample the world and kill at will. But what I am saying is that part of how they’re fighting him and how they’re viewing this in terms of black and white and good versus evil is exactly the fucking problem, and it’s that kind of bullshit that birthed the villain we know as Tomura Shigaraki to begin with.

#Shigaraki #Tomura Shigaraki #just my thoughts on it #Thank you for the question anon!#Morgana and friends

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dykesprentiss · 4 years ago

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ok so. i know a lot of this has probably been said before, but i wanted to put my two cents in. very rambly and disorganized because i am just like that.

i think everyone in this fandom needs to examine the way they interract with male vs female characters. why is it easier for you to focus on and create content for male characters that have appeared in 2 episodes maximum, then it is for the women that are in the main cast? why do you gravitate towards ships between two male characters who have never met (specifically jonah and like. his harem of old british men. usually based on one single line of dialogue) then the actual, canon wlw relationships?

like dont get me wrong, when lonely eyes first started cropping up it was funny! i enjoyed it, i enjoyed the multiple divorce jokes, because it was a small fandom in joke that made fun of some old bastards. and now its the second most popular ship in the fandom. now its so popular, people think its canon before they start listening. why are you unable to muster that same kind of enthusiasm for any of the female characters? gertrude and mary have very similar appeal to lonely eyes, and yet its a fringe ship that nobody ever talks about. gertrude and agnes have very significant moments and mentions in the podcast, and yet the only people i see talking about them are wlw.

or we could talk about michael and helen! helen who, as of this moment, has become a key player in the storyline. helen who yeeted michael out of existence, who took over the power of the distortion by her own choice, and with her own strength. and so often i see her relegated to "vodka aunt that coos over jonmartin" is that a bad take on her? of course not! but having her only purpose be to comment on the male characters rubs me the wrong way.

lets talk about elias and mary. elias gets praise, and love, and devotion, regardless of the horrible things he does. the entire fandom has the reputation of eliasfuckers now because everyone goes so crazy for him. mary is just as evil, has just as sexy a voice (i assume lol cause tbh? eel eyes does not do it for me and never will), and people just. hate her. full stop. why is that?

it seems like manuela has been. completely forgotten. i Never see anyone talk about her. she has just as much appeal as the male avatars, so why are you so uninterested in her? sasha and tim have the same amount of importance, and both have died, but there is So much more focus on tim. why.

daisy/basira and melanie/georgie are incredibly well developed relationships, their stories are as beautiful and tragic and intimate as jonmartin, but the f/f and m/m fic ratio on ao3 is abysmal. because it seems to me that the only people writing about them are wlw.

which happens.....a lot. het relationships and gay relationships are for everyone, but lesbian ships? thats just for gay women. everyone goes head over heels for mlm movies, regardless of sexuality, but wlw movies never receive the same kind of treatment. why.

this isn't even touching on the. blatant and disgusting fetishising of mlm. elias is evil because hes gay and skanky. tim is bi so he must sleep around. tim and martin are both mlm in the same vicinity of each other so they must have had a friends with benefits relationship. jon/elias and peter/martin have significant age differences and power disparities, so they must have an incredibly fucked up sexual relationship. jon is ace, but yall just fully ignore that so you can write horny fic of him. (and im going to be completely honest, if you get legitimate joy from writing manipulative r*pe fic involving these characters, Especially involving an ace character, ( edit: i apologize for my wording here, i didnt intend to compare trauma between ace and non ace ppl. my point is that jon seems to be the main target in these fics, and that they seem to be a direct response to his asexuality. fic like this is bad regardless of who is targetted). than that is a big problem. you arent "exploring dark topics in a meaningful way" youre writing fucked up porn for your own sick enjoyment. get angry at me all u want lmao but i stand by that)

i could go on about this forever, but what im really asking is for people to look inward and ask yourselves why you are so against connecting and interracting with female characters? no one is saying you cant like the men, but if theyre the only ones you care about? thats a problem. there are more women in tma then there are men, but they still feel like the minority because of the way the fandom acts. this isnt just a tma problem either! you can put as many rounded out female characters as you want into your content, and every time without fail they will be pushed to the side in favor of the men.

and dont come at me with "oh if you want content of the women you should make it" like we fucking are. the issue is that wlw are the only ones doing it. just take a second and think. are you ignoring the female characters in favor of the men? why? why is that your first instinct? why do you not feel the need to go against that instinct?

#the magnus archives #tma #i used to have so much more love for the male characters too but now im just tired lol #long post #ok to rb #rape mention tw

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retphienix · 4 years ago

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It's been 6 years :)

On March 30th, 2015 I decided I wanted a gaming side blog. (so we're early, but shush, it's the month for me)

I didn't know what I'd use it for exactly, but I had ideas- something I always have even if most of them only get as far as daydreamin' or writing out before closing them :P

For proof on the lack of direction the blog initially had- the March 30th date is the anniversary of my first post, an in-depth and lengthy review of Dragon Warrior Monsters for the GBC.

If you know the blog then you know "Extremely long and in-depth reviews" aren't the norm around here. As a matter of fact, that first post is the ONLY one I've done!

The closest I've come to ever repeating that would be the (word of the day) Directionless video I put out on Hades to get a grip on the concept of making videos, but that wasn't nearly as much of a 'review' as that first post is.

Tangent, definitely planning on trying my hand at videos some more for the foreseeable future. Probably not gonna use the tagline Full Impressions that I tossed as a whim for the Hades video but yeah- I'm excited to try my hand at a few videos :) tangent over.

It didn't take me long to come up with what I'd like to do for the blog though :)

A few months later I liveblogged a challenge run of FFT where I used only Ramza- a solo run. - Which maybe only happened because I tried a nuzlocke run a year prior on my main account-

(Nuzlocke | FFT challenge run)

Thanks to that haphazard liveblog experiment I started to realize a couple things which became the primary motivators behind this blog.

1) I LOVE sharing experiences. No brainer, I'm sure, but being able to share my experiences, and compare them with others' experiences, and just that mutual sharing is uplifting and feels good to do.

2) Liveblogging is an EXCEPTIONAL motivator to buckle down and play all those games I said I'd play (cue everyone laughing because I'm still way behind and have an immeasurable backlog).

But I mean that, on both respects. I have plenty of motivators toward the blog today, but if I were to be concise it's pretty much "It's easier to beat games if I liveblog them- otherwise I get distracted and play other games" and "I love sharing experiences and thoughts with people about my favorite thing- games."

Since 2015 I've tackled around 70 games as full playthroughs, and an untold ton as one offs or just to ramble about for a bit.

I've had a lot of highlights over the years, and I don't talk much about it as an overall experience so I thought for the anniversary I'd try to do just that. Not everything- I can't say I have photographic memory that would bring all of it up without prompting after all :P But whatever comes to mind as I browse some of my old stuff- as well as some thoughts on what I'd like to see in the future.

It's gonna be a bit self-centric I assume as I type this preamble to it, so let me say outright that this blog wouldn't be half of what it is without all the people who've given it the time of day over the years.

From recommending games they love or appreciate, to comparing thoughts, to offering kind words for analysis I've done over the years, to pointing out when I'm dumb and misread a situation :P- to, yes, even the people who decided "Fuck this guy's ramble" and deleted my captions before reblogging my gifs way back during Hamtaro (Of COURSE I remember that! It's amusing lol).

This is better because of others, because of the interactions and the people I've gotten the chance to chat with or befriend. It's just a liveblog more or less, my own little bit of fun I toss out for myself if for anyone- so seeing others enjoy this or that from the work I put into sharing my experiences or thoughts is always a joy in itself :)

Anyway, onto selfishly rambling about some tidbits of the past :)

Also sorry but no, opted to not shove a ton of photos in, it does have a handful of links to old posts though :P

This'll be disorganized as heck as I'll add to it over time before I feel it's worth posting (or the tumblr post editor becomes a hassle and more or less forces me to).

First~

FFT Solo Ramza Challenge: Considering it was roughly the first thing this blog has done, it's also something that's stuck in my head a lot more clearly than most of the other stuff I've done to be honest lol.

In truth, this is partially because FFT is my favorite game, bar none. But it's also because the whole experience was pretty new to me. Prior to it I had really only done one self-imposed-challenge that wasn't requested by the game in some manner and that was a nuzlocke run of Blue version.

So adding a challenge to my favorite game was a fantastic experience!

Notes I just wanted to say today about that run: If anyone enjoys FFT I honestly recommend giving it a shot for the unique story it lends itself to. I do recommend skipping the rules until after the second battle but that's up to YOU to decide.

My first post on the subject is me complaining about spending 4 hours grinding out the second fight and, despite hyperbole being my natural state, that was NOT hyperbole.

It DID take 60~ restarts to beat. It DID take 4 hours. The reason is that that 2nd battle is RNG as HECK, you HAVE to have Delita do some meaningful actions, you HAVE to have the enemies miss and make poor plays, you damn near HAVE to crit a few instances to save yourself from taking too much damage.

It's a numbers game to the extreme, so I wouldn't fault anyone for 'cheating' and skipping the 2nd fight for the ruleset lol.

The memory that stands out the most for that run is actually isolated in a post in which Ramza (Purrick in this run) talks like a total badass as just ONE DUDE running into a room full of enemies. I just think on that as a great encapsulated view of what it was like. The run started off face grindingly difficult, but because FFT is a game that offers so much freedom to the player it was extremely easy to 'break' the game into making Purrick overpowered as hell.

That's something I love about some tactical RPGs, I love having the ability to play smart so that I can play stupid later on, and breaking the game into making him one shot god is certainly a good payoff for playing smart early on :P

RetQuick: I miss RetQuick, it was primarily a short experiment I did in 2015 where I'd play a game for a short span of time (REALLY short, like 10-20 minutes) and record that for the purpose of making gifs and saying a short piece on what I thought.

It's one of those formats where the purpose was pretty shallow- but had a reason. I wanted to try making some gifs with some tools that existed online, so I made an excuse to do just that.

I also wanted to play a TON of games, usually through emulation on my sister's PSP, and this let me do that.

These two minor goals came together and so I spent a while making RetQuicks which were honestly more fun to make than they had any right to be. I mean the gifs were tedious but the playing? The thought sharing? The end product ocassionally having more appeal than just a photoset? It was fun.

I'm thinking whenever I have trouble picking a game for the blog I'll revisit the format... sorta.

I already reused it for a short stint to show clips I had no plan on expanding into a playthrough, but that died as well as it was too similar to Tidbits posts (another tag I no longer really use).

My thought is to rebrand retquick as something of a tryout for what game comes next. Play a handful of my backlog games for an hour or so each and say some thoughts before saying which one I'll continue as the main game for that period of time.

Old Tag Stuff: One of those things that only sticks to me since I made the decisions but it's always funny for me to look back on my old posts because I was apprehensive as hell toward making my posts visible. The reason my early playthroughs on the My-Tags page are variants of Ret instead of just "The name of the game so people can find this post" is because I felt like a liveblog would just spam the tag to hell-

Something I don't remotely feel bad for doing anymore.

So I avoided getting any sort of spotlight for quite a while on the blog for little reason.

Why Retphienix?: This is just a dumb thought I wanted to share and I'm sure I've said before.

It stands for retro!

Yeah!

Ain't that dumb and also not a real shorthand? lol

I think I have some sort of deer in headlights anxiety towards naming things, I mean do you think I think Full Impressions is a good summation for a video? I don't. But perhaps that's overshadowed by the other inexperiences and anxiety driven decisions that had- doesn't matter.

Retphienix is Retphienix because I sat there in 2015 and thought "Well... what do I name an alt account?"

My main is Redphienix, which yes, is ALSO a terrible name AND is misspelled. But it's that because of sentimental reasons. As a kid I misspelled Redphoenix when making my gamertag (I knew how to spell Phoenix back then as well, I was too excited about xbox live and misspelled it) and it's become something of a sentimental misspelling.

So I wanted to make a mix on that for my game blog, but I had no idea what. In the end I thought "RetroPhienix? I don't know. Retphienix is closer to Redphienix. I'll do that" and so it was done.

And just like how Redphienix is both bad and misspelled but exists because of sentimental reasons- Retphienix has acquired the same 'flavor' in my eye lol.

Aspirations for the blog: I have no immediate ramp up plans or road map or whatever, and in truth I'll be happy if the blog stays just as it is forever- up until tumblr ends- I cry over lost posts- and I reopen it on another platform.

But I do have blurry half-considered daydreams that I'd like to see happen for the blog through some hard work or shifts on my part.

One is something I'm already doing kinda, hence my embarrassing means of bringing it up a lot lately. Videos- I want those. I wanna make some looks back on series people don't talk about that I enjoy, I want to make videos sharing my thoughts on games I beat for the blog (like what full impressions kinda was, but I don't think they'll have a unified name from here on out). Maybe retrospectives, but mostly when I think of making a video tied to retphienix or me in general it's me looking at a game that said something to me, and saying it louder with my own interpretations on it.

You know the kind, videos where they talk about a video game but not the whole thing- just a singular message they really heard loud and clear from it intentionally or not. I dig those and I know I end a lot of games having plenty to say that could be directed into such a format.

We'll see.

And I'm along for the ride on that one as well- currently I'm keeping my eyes on whatever is directly next, which happens to be "I plan on playing Omori, if it clicks as something to talk about I would like to take a shot at that in a video too!"

The other is that I'd like to build a small community. Wouldn't know the first thing on doing that in a modern sense, but just a little online friend group to chat with and play games together. Something that could open up multiplayer and coop experiences being better shared on the blog and would just in general expand my gaming to what it used to be back on the 360 when I had a large group to play with.

Since the 360 era ended I've pretty much closed off- stopped playing competitive games due to lack of interest- and slowed down to playing all games either solo, with randoms (and no mic usually), or with my cousin. It's a rare instance when I play with some good people like @gamesception or another friend of mine, John.

When I diverted from playing competitive games nonstop toward other genres I didn't intend to also cut out all my online gaming buds, it just kinda happened, and I never really put any effort into rectifying that.

So more or less I'd like to one day sit down and work on a discord server, and then buck up and put the leg work in to make some gamin' buds again, but that's such a vague concept anymore.

Sounds all sad and what not but it's more ambivalent, I made decisions that

changed how gaming worked for me after the 360 and this is just where it landed for better and worse- I'd just like to see if I can make it a little better :P

General things I think when I think retphienix: Honestly? I think of how much fun I've had over the years and how thankful I am to have had an outlet that encouraged me to explore more of the medium.

I REALLY love games. I went to college for games, I've written LEAGUES about games, I've played countless games, my childhood was games, my adult life is games- games games games yada yada yada.

So when I think of retphienix I think of how without it I probably wouldn't have explored a lot of the corners of gaming that I have.

I genuinely, and I mean this, might not have sat down and beaten FF7 for myself and would have considered the amount I played as a kid to be enough.

I might not have played Chrono Trigger yet, and I KNOW I wouldn't have played Chrono Cross, and I'm happy as hell to have played both of those. CT was a mind blowing moment for me that showed me just how good an RPG can be, and CC gave me miles to think of in terms of innovating an RPG and how beholden to the narrative a sequel should be (I don't feel CC should have been chrono at all lol).

I DEFINITELY wouldn't have given New Vegas another chance. And I know I'm a sourpuss on NV, I've been that way since I maxed my achievements on the 360 for it, but replaying it really did reveal to me how exceedingly negative I was being.

My memories had become "It's brown and a boring location >:(" and "The factions all suck and it doesn't do anything with the idea of bad factions >:(" and became "It's... a little brown guys, not a big fan of the area" and "They didn't do enough with exploring the gray factions" while adding "Wait. This is pretty damn fun. And 90% of the additions are stellar. And I forgot about Dead Money, my favorite dlc in any game ever with a story that tears at my heart every time I think of it, NV good actually?"

Faxanadu would have remained a cool game I saw on SSFF and not a game I played to the end and fell in love with the aesthetic feel it has!

Also that's a game I cheated like crazy on lol, I would do it again! Save state scumming games meant to be rudely difficult is only fair :P

I probably would have never sat down to play through Windwaker which was such a positive and uplifting experience that I now get the most relaxed and warm feeling in my heart when I see those blue waves.

There's so many experiences I would have left on the table in favor of like... putting more hours into a live service title or something.

Maybe, and no offense to my cousin or anyone else playing it, but maybe I'd be no-lifing World of Warcraft nonstop just stagnating my interest toward the skinner box mechanics of an MMO?

Some offense, actually but lightheartedly lol.

But beyond the entire games I've played for the blog, when I think retphienix I picture all the time making gifs, all those games I played on the PSP for short stints, buying a retron 5 to add to what I could explore and being stoked when they shipped a freebie box of old controllers to go with it, getting angry at the retron for being a Piece Of Shit lol, crying at the end of damn near every game with an emotional story because I'm a big emotional mess of a person who finds investing and crying at a story way too easy thanks to empathy pulls, oh!-

Getting excited whenever I found that I had a "*controversial*" opinion that no one would care about lol. Like the one that comes to mind is that I thoroughly believe that Dragon Ball Z II: Gekishin Freeza!! for the NES is WAY better than the fandom recognized and appreciated sequel/remake Dragon Ball Z: Legend of the Super Saiyan!

How many people do you hear talking about either game, let alone saying the NES game that is roughly half of the SNES remake is the better one :P But I stand by that! The SNES one is a remake of DBZ1 and 2 for the NES but it loses all the charm and some of the fun of the NES ones by being a lackluster SNES game!

lol

I admitted wholeheartedly that this post would be a lit-

little directionless (gotta love the new tumblr poster making me break sentences like that), but to sum things up.

It's been 6 years. It's been an untold amount of work to be honest- liveblogging a game, at least for me, hasn't been the easiest thing. It's a lot of thinking out my thoughts (heh), it's a lot of learning tools to make the capturing process possible, it's a lot of experimenting, it's a lot of writing and editing, and, well, sometimes it's just tough.

I mean I went to school for coding, not video editing, not writing, not image processing, not this or that- but this hobby has introduced a lot of things even if only at a VERY base level (I admit fully to using online alternatives to make gifs for instance).

I learned a lot about, well, a lot of things in order to use this blog to learn more about games- and all that work has become part of why I've loved all 6 years of this blog.

6 years of gaming, work, and you all- and it's been worth the investment :) Here's to many more and all of you whether you stumble upon this post or not- literally anyone who's interacted in these 6 years, thank you, and anyone who hasn't I offer you well wishes as well.

#Retphienix #gaming #video games #gaming liveblog

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serenlyss · 6 years ago

Text

Abuse of Authority

Rating: T for some language and descriptions of violence (though there’s no actual fighting) Pairings: None this time, but I guess you can spot some Ritshou or Terumob if you really squint. Just Reigen being a dad for the most part. Summary: It's been a long day. Shou's father exploded. Mob grew a giant broccoli in the middle of the city. Teru lost his apartment. Ritsu helped burn down his own house. Reigen can't just leave them behind, so he offers them all to stay in his apartment. Is there enough space? Not really. Was he equipped to suddenly take care of four teenagers? Not in the slightest. But he'll be damned if he doesn't try. Crossposted to AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18445943

My first fic on tumblr! I’ve been wanting to write for MP100 for a few weeks now and finally got around to it. I guess you can call it a canon divergent post-world domination arc fic about all the kids having a sleepover at Reigen’s. Hope you like it!

“It’s not a lot of space, but it should work for a night,” Reigen sighed, reaching into the pocket of his slacks to fish out a ring of keys. The sound of metal on metal as the keys bounced off each other was loud compared to the quiet of the night; the sun had long gone down, and now that Claw had disbanded and the attempt at world domination had been thwarted, the whole city had gone ghostly silent. Not a helicopter or police car dared get too close to the giant broccoli in the center of the city, too afraid of another potential disaster.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine, right guys?” replied Shou, a grin on his face despite the harsh circumstances of the night’s battle. He stuck close to Ritsu’s side, making up for his obvious displeasure at being forced to stay in Reigen’s small apartment with a surprising enthusiasm. “It’s like a sleepover! It’ll be fun!”

Reigen flipped the lights on in the apartment, hanging his coat and keys next to the door like he always did. “Wait out here, I’ll find some food,” he said, though he doubted he had much to eat, especially with - how many kids were there, like three? Four? No, Teru had gone home. Too many to feed when he’d only ever shopped for himself, anyway. Still, anything was better than nothing. He disappeared around the corner into a separate kitchen, the sounds of cabinets opening and closing sounding from behind the wall.

Ritsu sighed, adjusting his grip on Mob’s legs as he carried his older brother into the dim apartment. He’d fallen asleep again after saying goodbye to Teru, his arms limp over Ritsu’s shoulder and his breathing soft and even. He leveled a glare at Shou. “Don’t make me remind you that it was your idea to burn down our house,” he retorted, clearly cross, though there was little real bite behind his accusatory words.

Shou just laughed in reply. “Come on, Ritsu, it worked, right?” He clasped his hands behind his head, stepping into the apartment behind Reigen and looking around curiously.

On Ritsu’s back, Mob stirred, woken by the sound of his friends’ voices. He hummed, arms moving up to grasp Ritsu’s shoulders gently and he looked around with bleary eyes. “Hmm? Did we make it?” he asked, breaking off into a yawn as he did.

Shou flashed him an apologetic smile. “Sorry, did we wake you up?” he asked. “You should sleep more, you really used a lot of power before.”

Mob shook his head, reaching up to rub his eyes with one hand as Ritsu set him back down on the ground. “No, it’s alright. I slept all the way back here,” he replied, though he was obviously still quite groggy. He looked around, as the others had, taking in Reigen’s small apartment. A tidy living area took up the front room, with a couch and coat rack up against the back wall and a coffee table in the center of the room. A modest television sat on a square-shaped table on the opposite wall, though it was powered off for now. “I’ve never been to Master’s apartment before,” he said thoughtfully, the title rolling off his tongue naturally after all these years of being Reigen’s student.

Ritsu fought back the scowl that came to his face at this, never having approved of Mob’s apprenticeship under who he considered a fairly obvious fraud. “It’s cleaner in here than I thought it would be. Reigen always seems so disorganized, I thought there would be stuff all over the place.”

“Hey! I’m very organized, thank you very much! I wouldn’t be able to run such a profitable business if I didn’t even have that going for me.” Reigen appeared from the kitchen again, holding a bag of potato chips in one hand and a tupperware container of brown rice in the other. A stack of mismatched bowls was balanced on top, one for each of them. He set them on the coffee table, then pointed a finger at Ritsu. “You should be more grateful to me for offering up my home to you. I could have just left you in the smoldering remains of your house, you know.”

“You wouldn’t do that,” Mob replied with an easy smile, reaching for one of the empty bowls and cupping it in both hands. “You’re too nice for that.”

Reigen opened his mouth, presumably to retort, then closed it again, feeling himself at a loss for words. “When did you get so ballsy?” he said quietly, voice taut, but he had to fight to keep the corners of his mouth from turning up.

Shou barked out a laugh, loud and rich, snapping up a bowl himself and eagerly reaching for the rice with a fork. “Aw, c’mon, Ritsu, drop the glum face for a bit. He was kind enough to let us sleep over, after all,” he pointed out.

Ritsu reached for a potato chip, examined it for a moment, then popped it into his mouth. “Whatever,” he mumbled. “Speaking of which, where are we even going to sleep?” He glanced up at Reigen; there wasn’t exactly a lot of extra space in here, and he doubted there was any kind of guest room in an apartment like this.

Reigen shrugged. “The couch folds out into a futon that could probably fit two of you, but whoever’s left over will have to make due with sleeping on the floor. I have some extra sheets and blankets for my bed you can borrow, make it a little softer, and I bet I could find a pillow or two if I look hard enough,” he explained. “I don’t usually have guests over, though. Honestly you’re lucky I even have the futon, I only bought it because it was cheap and small.”

“I’ll take the floor,” Shou offered immediately, glancing toward Mob and Ritsu before they could say anything. “You two share the futon.”

“Are you sure?” Ritsu asked, surprised by how fast he’d offered. “I don’t mind sleeping on the floor.”

Shou shook his head. “I can sleep anywhere, dude. You don’t have to worry about that,” he assured with a grin.

Mob offered the boy a small, kind smile. “Thank you, Shou, that’s very kind of you,” he said earnestly.

Reigen chuckled as the three conversed, but he was interrupted by a call on his cell phone. He pulled it out, frowning when he didn’t recognize the number.

Mob glanced at him, tilting his head in curiosity. “Who’s calling?” he asked. “It’s pretty late at night, isn’t it?”

“Probably a telemarketer calling to ask for a donation or something,” Reigen replied, standing up. “I’ll see who it is, you three keep eating.” The poor kids were probably starving after such a long day of fighting against adults. The thought made him scowl. Why should kids their age have to fight against adults abusing their powers? They may be espers, but they were still children who had other things to worry about. He closed the bedroom door behind him as he lifted the phone to his ear, picking up the call. “Hello?”

“Oh, Reigen! I’m glad you picked up, I was worried you might be asleep.”

Reigen blinked in surprise at the voice that came from his phone’s speaker. “... Teruki, is that you?” he asked, his brain taking a bit to catch up to his ear in his tired state. “Er, do you need something?”

A soft, somewhat nervous laugh came across the line. “Sorry to bother you like this. I got your phone number from Kageyama, so we could keep in touch, and I guess it came in handy. Um…” he trailed off, line going silent, and for a moment Reigen was afraid the connection may have cut out.

“Are you still there?” he asked, though he could pick up static noise on the other side of the line. “Look, kid, just tell me what you need, alright? We’re fine, if you’re wondering that. The other three are eating in the main room, do you want to talk to them?”

“Ah, sorry, that’s not why I called,” Teru replied quickly. “I, uh, got back to my apartment, but… it’s in worse shape than I remember. And by that, I mean most of my wall is gone and my furniture is kinda… destroyed.” He cleared his throat, sounding embarrassed. “I know I said I’d be fine on my own, but-”

“Your wall is gone?!” Reigen interrupted, his thoughts finally catching up with him enough to sputter something out. “What do you mean it’s gone? What happened? You know what, that doesn’t matter right now. Are you safe? Jesus, you shouldn’t sleep in an apartment with a hole in a wall, you might get sick.” He continued to ramble for a moment, listing all the irresponsible things that could happen to a kid living in an apartment with no wall and no furniture, but paused when he heard Teruki’s stifled laughter on the other end of the line.

Teru attempted to disguise the laughter with a cough, clearing his throat. “Yeah, yeah, I get it,” he said in an almost teasing way. “And yeah, I’m safe, it’s just my apartment that was damaged. But, uh, I don’t really have any other place to go right now, so… is the offer to crash at your place still open?”

Reigen blinked, mind running a mile a minute as he tried to determine if there was enough space. Even if there wasn’t, though, could he really say no? “What about your parents?”

The line went quiet again for a moment before Teru answered, in a softer voice, “They’re overseas. I live by myself, so you don’t have to worry about that. They send me money, too, but I’m too young to book a hotel room, so, uh, my options are limited. Do you have space?”

Well, now he definitely couldn’t say no. But still, a kid who couldn’t be older than fourteen, living by himself with no parental guardians to even check in on him in person? Not only was it probably illegal for Teru’s parents to leave him alone like that, but there was no way a kid like him could care for himself completely. There was a reason kids weren’t considered adults until they were eighteen, even if he could cook and clean for himself just fine. “Yeah, yeah, I have space. Do you live far? I can come by in a taxi and pick you up if you need it. Do you have any extra clothes of blankets or anything that didn’t get messed up?” His worry for Teru was rising by the moment as he started to imagine what the life of a fourteen year old boy with no parents and all the responsibilities of an adult must be like. Was he eating right? Was he keeping his place clean? What happened when things broke, and he didn’t have the authority to call a plumber, or a mechanic?

“Uuhh, I’ll look. I think I have some clothes that weren’t burned, but my bed got toasted. And it’s okay, I can walk. Just send me the address,” Teru replied, and in the background Reigen heard the sound of drawers opening and closing. “Aha! My clothes seem like they’re mostly intact, at least the ones not in the closet. I have some sweatpants, pajamas, tee-shirts… want me to bring extras? I’m not sure if Kageyama and his brother were able to salvage anything from their house before… you know.”

That was actually… a really good idea, Reigen realized. They’d stopped by the school to pick up Mob’s gym clothes, but none of the Body Improvement club members had anything else that would fit the smaller, slighter middle schoolers, and he sure as hell didn’t either. “Yeah, if you can spare them, that would actually be really great. You sure you don’t need a taxi, though? It’s late at night, there might be some creeps hanging around.”

Teru laughed again, the sound echoing from Reigen’s speakers. “I think I’ve been in enough fights that a few creeps won’t be any threat,” he assured, though it didn’t do anything to make Reigen feel better, because now he was thinking about how Teru had probably been targeted by Claw just like Mob and Ritsu had, and it was making his stomach feel sour.

Still, he didn’t doubt Teru could hold his own. “Alright, if you say so. I’ll leave the door unlocked, so just let yourself in,” he said. “I’ll text you the address. Just… be safe, alright?” His voice softened some, hoping his warning would get across to the younger boy.

“Will do, boss, don’t worry about me. I’ll be there soon.” He paused for a moment before adding, “Thanks for taking me in.”

Reigen smiled softly, running a hand through his hair. These kids were going to be the death of him someday, he could feel it. “Don’t mention it, kid. See you soon.”

“See you.”

A click signaled the end of the call, and Reigen tucked his phone back into his pocket. He stood up and stretched his back with a soft sigh. He’d have to buy more food, and make sure he had plenty of blankets… well, the shopping could at least wait until tomorrow morning. For now he’d better tell the other boys about his phone call. He pushed open the bedroom door and abruptly halted when he sat that the couch had been completely opened up to reveal the collapsible futon inside.

“Oh, Master! We were just getting the bed set up,” Mob said, looking up at him with a smile. “Who was on the phone?”

Reigen made his way carefully around the futon, which now took up a good chunk of space. The coffee table had been moved closer to the kitchen and now pressed up against the wall with the couch’s cushions laying atop it, the leftover rice and opened bag of potato chips taking up one side. “Ah, it was Teru,” he replied. “Turns out his apartment got pretty badly, er, damaged.”

Mob’s smile faltered at this, replaced by a fairly obvious worry. “Is he alright?”

“He’s fine, he’s actually on his way here,” Reigen answered. “He’s going to bring some of his extra clothes, too, and more blankets if he can find any. You’re in luck.”

Shou let out a breath from where he’d been sitting on the bed’s edge, flopping back fully onto the futon underneath. “Thank god, these clothes smell like dog shit,” he said, tugging on the collar of his jacket.

“Shou,” Ritsu scolded with a glare, earning a laugh from his red-haired friend.

“Sorry, sorry, my clothes smell like crap,” he corrected, cheshire grin spreading across his face as he tilted his head backward to stare upside-down at Ritsu. “For real, though, these pants are ruined.” He gestured to his torn jeans, which had ripped in several places from his earlier scuffles and the explosion that came from Mob’s collision with his father.

Ritsu sighed, perching himself on the bed’s other side. “Mine too,” he grumbled, poking his finger through a tear in the bottom of his shirt. “Anyway, d’you think Teru will bring us some real people clothes or more of what he usually wears?”

Shou shrugged, stretching his arms up behind his head. “I dunno, I don’t really care as long as they fit and don’t have holes in them,” he answered.

“Teru always looks very colorful,” Mob chimed in, placing one of Reigen’s spare pillows on one side of the bed. “I like the way he dresses.”

Ritsu couldn’t help but laugh softly at this. “Of course you would.”

Reigen had fallen quiet as the kids talked idly amongst themselves, scrolling through his notifications and reading any important messages. He’d received a text from Teru not long after they’d gotten off the phone saying he was on his way, so now it was just a waiting game. He raised a hand to his mouth to stifle a yawn, eyelids heavy from the long day. “Don’t you kids think you should get some sleep?” he suggested. “It’s been a long day.”

“Aw, c’mon, dad, it’s a slumber party now, right? Everyone knows you have to stay up all night,” Shou replied with a snarky grin, sitting back up on the bed. “You, on the other hand, are free to go to bed whenever you want to.”

“Twenty-nine is not old!” Reigen snapped. “Besides, I can’t sleep until Teruki gets here and I know everyone has a place to sleep. It would be irresponsible of me not to make sure of at least that.”

“I didn’t call you old, I said you’re a dad. Or at least you act like one,” Shou pointed out, though his own experience with parental figures was… pretty bad, if he was to admit it. Still, the way Reigen shepherded the group and made sure they were taken care of is what he imagined a good father was like. Well, not everything about Reigen screamed good father material, but some things. Certain things. “Never mind that. We can keep an eye out for Teru, no worries.”

---

Despite Shou’s enthusiasm about staying up late, he was the first of the three to pass out, sprawled out on the floor next to the futon on top of a soft blanket Reigen had given to him to use. The house got much quieter after that as Mob and Ritsu moved to put proper sheets and blankets on the futon and eventually followed their friends lead, the two of them squished together comfortably on the small bed.

Reigen didn’t sleep yeet, as much as he really wanted to, afraid that he’d miss Teru’s arrival or somehow mess things up in another, unrelated way. He found himself dozing occasionally as he sat in one of his kitchen chairs, roused only by the door quietly cracking open a little while after Ritsu finally fell asleep. Teru slipped inside, hefting a stuffed-looking bag over his shoulder as he did.

Reigen stood up immediately, holding a finger to his lips as Teru flashed him a confused look. He nodded to the three other kids asleep on the floor and futon. “You took longer than I thought, I was getting close to calling you to make sure you hadn’t been kidnapped or something.”

Teru smiled at the sight of his friends, though he looked slightly disappointed that they were already asleep. “Sorry, it was, uh, a longer walk than I anticipated,” he murmured in reply. “I brought clothes, though, at least what I could salvage, and I managed to snag a blanket that wasn’t buried in debris, so that’s cool too.”

Reigen gave a nod a this, seemingly pleased, and waved for Teru to follow him into his bedroom. He left the door open, moving toward the closet at the side of the room. “C’mon in, I have some extra blankets and pillows you can use, but you’ll have to sleep in the floor with Shou. Mob and his brother claimed the futon couch,” he explained, reaching up to take down another stack of blankets from the top shelf of his closet. “Thanks for bringing the clothes, by the way. I think the others will appreciate having something not torn to shreds to wear in the morning.”

Teru glanced around the room before taking a seat on the edge Reigen’s bed, nestling his backpack between his legs. “No problem. I figured it would help pay you back a little for letting me stay over, at least ‘til I can figure out what to do about my apartment.”

Reigen set the pile of sheets on the bed for now, glancing at Teru with a slight frown. “You don’t have to pay me back. You’re a kid who needs a place to stay, I’m an adult who has some empty floor space and a couch. Besides, you’re all Mob’s friends, and, well, I owe him.” He glanced down at this, focusing on the pile of blankets and hoping Teru wouldn’t pry any further. The last thing he needed was to spill all his secrets regarding his falsified relationship with Mob to a fourteen-year-old with bad fashion taste.

Luckily for him, Teru didn’t ask about the alleged favors. “Still, I feel bad about barging in at the last second. I’ve always just kinda taken care of myself, the last few years,” he admitted, fiddling with his backpack strap. “It feels weird to ask a favor from another adult again, I guess.

Reigen sighed softly, then moved to sit in the bed next to Teru. “I mean, I did offer you to stay here before you mentioned having a place of your own,” he pointed out. “Besides, it can’t be healthy to be by yourself after… everything that happened, with Claw and the kidnappings and the whole world domination stuff. You guys may be psychics, but you’re still just kids.”

Teru chuckled softly, shrugging his shoulders. “Those guys had been coming after me long before they got to Ritsu. I was used to it,” he said in such a casual manner that it threw Reigen for a loop all over again. Just because he could defend himself didn’t mean he had to, he was barely a teenager.

“You shouldn’t have had to get used to it in the first place,” Reigen retorted, a hint of bitterness in his voice. “I know you kids are powerful, I’ve seen all of you fight firsthand, but that doesn’t mean you should get used to a life like that. You all deserve way better.” He clasped his hands together, fingers gripping tightly. “It’s not fair that you kids had to do all the fighting for the rest of us because none of the adults were strong enough or brave enough to do it themselves. I wasn’t… able to do anything, in the end.”

Teru hummed, leaning back on his hands and looking up at the ceiling. “I don’t think that’s true,” he said softly. “You did punch Shimazaki in the face, after all.” He flashed Reigen a grin. “Plus, you’re giving all us kids a place to sleep. Without you, we might all be sleeping on park benches tonight.”

He paused, smile fading some and turning bittersweet. “I guess you’re right, it does suck that we had to do all of that, but that’s kind of just how I’ve been living, these last few years. Dodging Claw when they came after me, controlling my classmates with fear and violence, doing everything I could to survive. I was… a pretty shitty person, before Kageyama brought me down a few pegs. I probably still wound be, if he hadn’t.”

“All kids are shitty. Being a good person is something us adults are supposed to teach you. Sounds like you didn’t have a lot of that, growing up.” Reigen ran a hand through his hair, pushing his bangs away from his forehead with a sigh. “Look, I know I only got wrapped up with you kids basically by accident, but… you can call me if you ever need anything, alright?”

He glanced sideways at Teru, caught off-guard when he saw that Teru was staring back at him with wide eyes. Feeling suddenly embarrassed, he raised a hand to his mouth and added, quickly, “As long as it’s not during my work hours, of course! I can’t do anything if I’m with a client, or out on a job, but, y’know, you can leave a message or something.”

Teru laughed aloud, raising a hand to his face, and as Reigen chanced another glance his way he saw him wipe a tear away from the corner of his eye. “Thanks, Reigen. I’ll take you up on that, if it ever comes up,” he replied earnestly, and as he lowered his hand again it revealed a shaky but very pleased smile.

Reigen found himself momentarily speechless as he stared down at Teru. Was it really so pleasing to him just to be offered some help in case of emergency? The suggestion had just felt natural at the time, but it was clear that Teru had really taken it to heart. He glanced away, feeling his face heat up in telltale embarrassment, and stood up again. “Well, in any case, it’s late and you should probably get some rest,” he announced, glancing down at the watch on his wrist. The hour hand taunted him, sitting a little past four in the morning. Good god, it really was late. He picked up the bundle of blankets and an extra pillow he’d taken from his bed to lend to Teru, pushing them into the boy’s hands. “Here, go find a spot to set these up. I’ll take the clothes you brought with you and throw them in the wash for now, that way they’ll be ready for everyone in the morning.”

Teru nodded, taking the blankets and passing Reigen his backpack. “They’re in the big pocket,” he explained, heading for the door. He paused as he reached it, glancing over his shoulder. “Thanks again, Reigen. It really means a lot to me.” With that said, he cracked open the door and slipped outside, closing it quietly behind him.

Reigen set the backpack on the bed, catching some muffled talking on the other side of the door, what sounded like Teru telling a drowsy Mob to go back to bed. He opened the large pocket of the backpack like Teru had told him and began pulling clothes out from inside. Although the clothes themselves seemed to have been untouched by whatever destroyed Teru’s apartment, they were still dusty, and some of them carried a faint, unpleasant smoke smell. Guess I was right about needing to put these in the wash, he thought to himself, setting them aside for now. Hopefully the smell wouldn’t stick, or they’d have to be thrown out entirely.

He moved to his dresser and cracked open a drawer in search of clean pajamas, knowing his suit was thoroughly destroyed and definitely stunk from how much he’d been tossed around today. He quickly changed into a more comfortable, and more importantly clean, tee shirt and pair of sweatpants, tossing his ruined suit aside. He’d have to throw it out and buy a new one, but that wasn’t where his thoughts were leading him. He frowned deeply, going back over his conversation with Teru over the phone. He lived by himself, in an apartment. He had to cook and clean for himself, get himself up for school, do all his own shopping, the list went on and on.

It felt like Teru’s parents had abandoned him.

Reigen shook his head, sighing. It wasn’t his place to cast judgement, at least not yet. Not until he’d heard the whole story. Though, with the way Teru had been so hesitant to admit his situation in the first place, he doubted the boy would be too quick to incriminate his own family.

That didn’t keep him from worrying, though. There was no way it was legal for an adult to leave their son at home while they went overseas, even if Teru was capable of at least keeping himself alive. What did he do when he was sick? He had no adult to call his school and tell them he wouldn’t be coming. Pursing his lips, Reigen scooped up the bundle of clothes Teru had brought with him and headed out of the bedroom, careful to make as little noise as possible.

Mob had gone back to sleep already, the thick blanket on the futon pulled up so far it nearly covered his mouth and nose. He looked cozy, Reigen noted with a soft smile. Teru had set up shop on the floor beside the futon, and though he stirred slightly as Reigen passed by him, he didn’t sit up or open his eyes. Shou was laying starfish style on his back, his own blanket covering his stomach and leaving his arms and shoulders exposed. One of his bare feet peeked up from the bottom of the blanket, and his mouth was partially open, an occasional soft snore sounding from him. Ritsu had curled up on his side, the blanket tucked firmly around him. The kids looked peaceful, and not at all like they’d just gone through a near-death experience. Well, he supposed, it wasn’t the first, and there was potential that it wouldn’t be the last.

Reigen frowned at the thought, feeling uncharacteristically protective all of a sudden. Watching Mob fight had been terrifying, for all kinds of reasons, but it had paled in comparison to the fear he’d felt when Mob had run to him, bruised and bleeding, telling them to run away before they were all killed by Touichiro’s uncontrollable psychic power. Seeing Mob’s true power didn’t make him feel nearly as afraid as he’d been when Touichiro’s power had erupted, the unspeakable terror he’d experienced at the thought that an adult’s childish actions had caused the death of a middle schooler.

Reigen swallowed thickly, turning away from the now-crowded living room of his apartment and passing through the kitchen to the adjacent laundry room. It wasn’t just Mob who had suffered as the result of adults turning their backs on the younger generation. Every one of the children now asleep in his living room bore the trauma of the realization that adults weren’t always going to be on their sides. Shou and Teru in particular seemed as though they didn’t have a lot of trustworthy adults to turn to in times of need, their trust shattered by the abuse of authority and power disparities they’d lived through.

He dropped the bundle of clothes into the washer, not even bothering to separate them into color groups as he closed the lid and began to wash cycle. He’d throw them in the dryer in the morning, before the others woke up. For now, though, the fatigue of the day bore down on his shoulders and eyelids, silently begging him to get some rest. The clock now read four-thirty in the morning, and he didn’t doubt that he’d likely sleep in past noon, but it wasn’t like he had anywhere to go tomorrow, anyway. His office was a pile of ashes, and with Seasoning City in a state of panic, he doubted any schools or offices would be operating for a few days, until the situation was resolved.

He dragged himself back to his bedroom, practically collapsing into bed. There was still lots to do before he could consider his work done, but for now, he just needed to sleep.

#mob psycho 100 #fanfic #dad reigen #eeyy first fic on tumblr #maybe i'll gradually upload some of my old stuff as well #anyway hope yall like it #serendipitousfics

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yourplasticlittlespastic · 5 years ago

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ᴏᴜʀ ᴡᴇʙ ᴏꜰ ʟᴏᴠᴇ – Peter Parker fanfic (4/of many)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

"I told you I never saw her coming out of the building!" I flutter my eyes hearing Happy's altered voice

"Then where the fricking fork is her?" my dad shouts back

I walk to the living room where the shouts were coming from and scratch my eyes, the drowsy feeling makes me stumble with my own feet

"What time is it?" I say between yawns

"wha... hey! where were you, missy?" my dad comes running at me

"on the I+D floor, working but I obviously fall asleep there, my back is killing me," I say without opening my eyes "now if you don't mind, I need my bed" I slowly stroll my way to my room and shut the door behind me

"She's going to become you" Happy whispers at the other side of the door before I doze off again

------------------

I quickly run downstairs, I take a donut and head to the lift

"what about your lunch?!!" my mom snorts surprised it's the first time I stayed asleep

"I'm running late, I'll buy something there!" I shout back and get inside the lift

When I find Happy at the street I nudge him and he starts driving to Midtown, I almost choked with the donut but survived. I close the door behind me and wave goodbye, I quickly walk to my locker and see that the guy from yesterday was trying to open it, I just stop some meters away from him.

"mmm hi!" I raise a little my voice for him to listen "what are you doing? huh?"

He turns at me and smiles "oh hey! it's you! well... I'm trying to open it but I think it's stuck" he continues to force the lock

"well..." I step closer "maybe because it's my locker?"

He squints his eyes making a confused face "what? no, they even wrote me down the number... look" he hands me a paper and I look at it

"yeah... mine is 896 and maybe if we turn this paper the other way... we have... 968... here" I give back the paper and he looks at it and sighs in embarrassment

He touches his messy hair "well, this is awkward... I almost ruin your locker... and mine is just across from yours..." he points to the other wall with lockers

"oh well, what a coincidence, go and break that lock...go on" I laugh

I open my locker and watch as he opens his and laughs, I take out my books and someone pokes my shoulder, the boy is now beside me.

"Hello again" he mutters "my name is-" but he was interrupted by Morita

"Classes are beginning! come on everyone! with energy!" he cheerfully claps and I look at the boy who rolls his eyes and then looks at me

"Need to go, running late" he smiles and starts walking away

"hey! what year are you in?!!" I shout at him

"JUNIOR!!!" he shouts opening the door of his classroom

Mmmm junior, he is 16...I stop the thoughts and walk to English. All the class was boring, just a debate about if love is the main topic in Romeo and Juliet, I avoid talking and so as Peter. Next was Biology with Harrington which consisted of a freaking show of plants and a talk about dinosaurs where most of the boys allow their inner child out. Then at Chemistry, I'm dangerous, I know that. Because I love to experiment with everything I can. I was beside Flash much to my disappointment so we started working but one of the Petri glasses fall so I spin to grab it and spot Peter experimenting with some mysterious liquids, he notices me eyeing the weird mix and he hardly gulps stopping everything and nervously smiled at me.

"what's that?" I whisper pointing at the weird mixture

"it's just ummm, nothing actually. I was bored" he whispers back

"hey! Penis Parker just close your mouth" Flash turns to him and whispers

"something you want to share Eugene?" Cobbwell raise his voice, making us turn and do our work

In the end, I see Peter running quickly the other way. So I ramble to the cafeteria, I'm starving. When I step there, all eyes were on me, but the look everyone was giving me it wasn't a look of good attention... it was resentment, angry looks, I knew it was about Sokovia, the topic it's kinda fresh. I walk to the food counters and start picking what I wanted, the cafeteria was now more silent than ever but eh, can't please everyone, it's not my fault, it's not my fault. Then someone pokes my left shoulder so I sigh and turn around, preparing to hear a speech of hate but it was that boy from earlier.

"Hey, you" He smiles with a tray of food in his hands

"hey," I happily say and shake the serious face "how were your first classes?"

"I loved them, I really like school, to be honest" he shrugs "so umm, I have nowhere to sit and people here already have friends so... would you like to sit with me?"

"ReallY' Oh, best decision you could ever make... I... yeah sure, let's go I have a good place for us"

I walk in front of him leading the way. Before I could open the doors I turn my face and see a bunch of girls sitting around a crying girl... oh... it's Natalie Spencer, sister of Charlie Spencer... a casualty of the Sokovia accident, from what I heard... he was building sustainable houses there.

I gulp, a sting of sadness outpours me. It's not my fault, it's not my fault.

The cool air hits my face, I walk across the damp grass and slump in the benches in front of the field, my usual spot.

"What a view!" he examines all around and sits beside me "it's like we are VIP" He grabs his burger and starts eating, not questioning me why I'm not presenting him to other people "I never told you my name by the way..."

"you look like amm a... Stephen?" I start eating my pizza

"am I a joke to you?" he touches his heart"

"all right! tell me your name then"

"I'm Harley Keener but Harley is ok" he kindly smiles

"nice to meet you Harley...pizza?" I offer and he nods

"maybe half a slice..." he cuts the pizza "you never told me your name... you want some fries?"

"Tannie, my name is Tannie and yes, I was staring at your fries..." I snort

"never heard that name before, I like it"

All the recess we talked about ourselves and what we like, my sense of humour was complemented with his, with so little time we already began a fight of witty comments, we laughed too hard that I even think that now I just have a six-pack like Steve now. We walk back, he has Chemistry, and I have music.

"So Rose Hill, Tennessee, that was a big change huh?" I ask feeling a Deja-vu, I heard that name before...

"It was, but I'm happy here now. It's just my sister, my mom and me so..." he steps in front of his classroom "see you later maybe?"

"of course! bye, Harley!" I wave goodbye and walk to music

When I enter the classroom I see everyone already holding their respective instruments, I see Peter with his flute and I internally laugh, he's so bad that I need to tell him...

"Hey Tannie!" he flashes a thin smile and I lower myself

"You're holding your flute so wrong Peter" I gently snatch it from his hands and demonstrate him the proper way "like this, see?"

"oh, uh... I've been doing it so wrong... thanks! I suck at this" he stutters and I squeeze his shoulder

"It's the first time someone touches your flute, Parker??!!!" Flash mockingly shouts from the other corner of the classroom and I almost choke when I hear his double sense so I turn to him and fulminate Flash with my stare

"oh! I didn't see you there Tannie...umm you are not... touching... umm Peter's flute of course..." he nervously says, trying to fix it but making it worse

I snort and turn to look at Peter who's ears are red and cheeks are blushed. I just hand him his flute without saying anything. Music and Art were bearable enough, then I head to Robotics and sigh when the only decent person skipped the club, again... so now I have to socialize. Minutes later I begin designing the official blueprints of the EMMA project, my concentration was broken when someone pokes my shoulder. So I spin.

"well, are you stalking me?" I quirk my brow at Harley who's carrying a bunch of papers

"You wish, you are the one stalking me!" he replies slumping beside me

"here, let me help you" I stand up and grab some papers that were almost falling "maybe you need a binder?"

"Probably but my kind of organization is disorganization" He shrugs and all those papers fly all over my desk

"Harley, this is cool" I grab one of his blueprints and raise it "I like how you fusion this part with this one" I point out

"really?" He leans to look at the paper "I like it too! you know, I got this inspiration since I was little, a friend of mine help me with super-advanced tools and yeah..."

"What a friend" I answer listening to his story "You know, if you ever need to work with more super-advanced tools, you can come to my place" I absentmindedly say

"Thanks, Tannie!" he then starts collecting all his papers and begin working

---------------

"and then I just ran to the river, the bees were all over me and my adrenaline was over the top" Harvey walks with me to the entrance

"and never got stung?"

"never! but I learned my lesson, not eating honey outside" he scratches his neck, I see Happy and wave at him

"that's me" I point to the car

he laughs "so the desperate driver is your desperate driver?"

"that's the one" I huff "you need a ride?"

"oh no! I just walk don't worry, thanks though"

"come onnnn!! I insist" and I insisted too much because grab his backpack frogmarching Harvey to the car and Happy's expression is priceless "Hey!"

"Hello Miss" Happy pretends to professional, he grabs his dark glasses and puts them on, I know he's staring at Harley "hello Mr....?"

"Keener but please call me Harley" he smiles at Happy shifting his backpack to his lap

Harley told me he lives in Queens near Highland Park so we were heading there, all the drive we were joking and talking about our robotics ideas.

"Sorry to interrupt but Cooper Ave and local streets are closed because of an accident" Happy announces

"well... what about if we go to my place?" I offer "maybe streets will open in some hours?"

"I don't want to be a burden," Harley says

"good..." Happy whispers but I manage to listen to that

"come on, I can show you everything I have for building robotic things" I throw my hands in the air and he chuckles

"just a for a little while then..." he nods and Happy grunts driving to the tower

When we arrive at the tower I see three trucks of U-haul full of boxes and furniture, the moving was faster than dad told me. I step inside waving at the daytime workers inside and Harley is eyeing everything in awe, when we enter the complex it was almost empty, I stroll to the kitchen and Harley behind me.

"want something? there are frozen vegetables, a weird dish that says paprikash and waffles..." I close the fridge "or take out?"

"last option sounds more appealing," he says leaving his stuff at the counter

We start talking, Harley is trying his best not to blurt a bunch of questions about my home. Then, I hear someone coming in, it's my dad that jogs directly to the bar and pours himself a glass of something, he looks up sensing a pair of eyes watching him and he smirks at me.

"Hey kiddo" he approaches me and instantly catches Harley at the other end of the kitchen "and hello male kiddo..." he says the last thing awkwardly

I see how the face of Harley changes to a surprise one, he totally knows who is Tony Stark and then I notice my dad's face changing as well and he covers his mouth.

"wait there..." my dad points at Harley

"Tony The mechanic!!" Harley shouts sliding from the high bench

"kid Keener!" my dad also shouts "I thought you were throwing potatoes at Rose Hill?" he excitedly palms the back of Harley and I just watch the scene quietly and confused

"still a hobby but after what you did for me... I improved my stuff"

"Can someone explain to me what is happening?" I finally speak and both turn to me

"well, honey... wait how you are here... with her?" my dad points between us waiting for an answer

"He just transferred to Midtown and we just met" I explain and my dad nods

"and Rogers was right, it's a small world after all" he mutters

"so you are his daughter?" Harley talks to me

"Better and improved" I proudly nod making y dad laugh "so... how you two met?"

"You know the story, about your mom's weird ex"

"Killian..."

"and the fact that I had to fake my death for a while"

"yeah... I was pretty traumatized..."

"while doing so, this fine kid or teenager I must say now... gave me asylum in his garage"

"he is the friend I told you who gave me those fancy super-advanced tools" Harley now speaks

"well, I wasn't expecting that" I honestly say while scratching my nose

"but hey! you grew up!" my dad turns to Harley

"yeah that is life ya know," Harley remarks making me laugh

"Are we still connected??" my dad touches his heart and makes a funny face

"shut up," Harley says and my dad laughs even harder, I'm feeling like the third wheel here

"is this lady offered you something?" my dad then points at me "you want a drink?" he says bringing his drink to his lips and I quirk my brow at him "I mean...like Minute Maid or a Capri Sun?"

"it's fine, we just order some take out" Harley sits beside me and my dad approaches us

"T, watch out for this kid, he's a pain in the a-"

"dad!!!!" I interrupt him

"Do you still have panic attacks?" Harley asks suppressing a smile making my dad spin to me

"I'm telling you T, a pain in the private parts" he grabs his glass and walks to his office "I'll be there if you need me. Not throwing potatoes please!" he shouts and closes his office door

"well... that was so bizarre" I finally add

The take out came and we ate at my room, we really had a great time laughing, joking and we begin designing a prototype of a machine, he was really smart and witty, a weird sense of humour. The highlight of the day was his face lighting up when he saw the robotics lab at the tower so we stayed there some minutes but in the end, it wasn't minutes, we were there for three hours. Finally, it was time for him to go so I told Happy if he could drive him and he refused but I blackmailed him with a video I took at the summer of him dancing to the Backstreet Boys so he reluctantly drove Harley.

From my room, I spot Uncle Rhodey walking to my dad. Nat, Steve, and Vision following him minutes later. Everyone with a tired face... no Scrabble today I see, so I decided the only thing to do is homework. I went to bed drooling all over the pillow

---I totally know it's a Peter Parker Fanfic but PATIENCE MIDGARDIANS! some drama and confusion is necessary---

A/N: hope you liked it! Also available in Wattpad! https://my.w.tt/sw2CZNdCv1

#peterparker #peter parker x reader #spider-man #spiderman #peterparkerfic #tomholland #tonystark #marvel #marvelcinematicuniverse #Marvelfanfic #fanfic #wattpad fanfic #tumblr fanfic #civil war #Avengers #midtown #steverogers #pepperpotts

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fedorasaurus · 7 years ago

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Dream Journal

As a heads-up, this writeup is long, wordy, and contains some mentions of war and aircraft-related death. It might be the most detail that I can remember from a dream, likely because I began to verbally recall it within minutes of waking up (thanks Flib for letting me ramble about disturbing weirdness first thing in the morning).

September 07, 2017 Part 1: I was in a club or dance party of some kind. The room was very small, maybe the size and dimensions of a trailer. The room was dark besides multicolored lights, but I could make out the appearances of the partygoers without much trouble. The fashion style of their clothing suggested that the time period was closer to the 70’s or 80’s rather than 2017. A few people down to my right was a tall woman with light skin and blond hair in a ponytail. She wore a long, light gray or tan dress with plain features. She danced along with the rest of the crowd, but I think she also mentioned something about having to leave in time to make it to class. A man appeared from where there was now an obvious door across from where I was standing. He was an older gentleman in a brown trenchcoat, thick-framed glasses, and a brownish hat. He might have spoken to the tall woman, I’m not sure. But his presence was her cue to leave the party for class (I think the implication was that this man was her professor). Before she left, she made a comment along the lines of “and North Korea is going to drop a nuke on us.” Immediately after this was spoken, the room went silent. Everyone stopped dancing, and the overhead lights came on. We all stared at this woman, as though annoyed that she had gone and ruined our fun with her fear-mongering. Being reminded of the troubled political climate made me feel tense and deeply anxious. It was a discomfort that remained even after I woke up.

(Part 2 continues below)

Part 2: A second dream that night was set during a vacation or a road trip. I was with Flib, Flib’s sister (D), Flib’s grandmother, and possibly my brother (E) was with us too, though it seemed like the dream was switching between Flib and E being on the trip.

As it started, we were in a souvenir shop, with all the usual knickknacks for sale: postcards, shirts, keychains with names on them, etc. What I was struggling with was trying to find a gift for my dad’s birthday (though IRL his birthday was several months ago). I didn’t think he would like any of these gift shop items, though I almost bought him a dark blue tie that had some writing embroidered on it with a similar shade of blue. I don’t recall what it said. But even the gifts specifically geared toward fathers weren’t especially great, and I commented to maybe D that it’s particularly difficult when my dad says he doesn’t want anything for his birthday.

The storekeeper then showed us into the back room, which was actually a whole other section of the store, and closed the door behind him. This section of the store was more like a comic book/collectibles department. But a bit more disorganized. Dim lighting, racks of books and games, lightweight card tables under which cardboard boxes were packed with miscellaneous action figures and other memorabilia. I enjoyed looking around all the books and collectibles, particularly the action figures, which were all unboxed and dirty, having seen prior use/wear-and-tear. I thought about buying some for my photography, but decided that they weren’t very posable, and moved on to a box containing lots of small metal badges. Something having to do with a fighting game, like an award or something. At the bottom of the box was a diamond ring with a gold band, which seemed out of place, until I recalled that a marriage proposal was part of the fighting game’s plot. I decided that the ring must not be REAL gold and diamond, just a replica for prop purposes.

I noticed that some of the display boxes featured characters from a video game that I recognized, though was not especially well-known. I asked the shopkeeper about it, and he expressed much genuine interest and trivia: “did you know that the main character was also in [other game]?” I was fascinated, mentioning that I hadn’t, and he went on to show me gameplay of the game in question (I don’t recall what he said the title was).

There was the protagonist, albeit in a more casual, less fantasy-oriented design. A black t-shirt had some white wording on it that was difficult to make out from the pixels (GBA-era, though it was being played on a non-portable console of some kind). I don’t know what the game was about; the gameplay I saw just featured the character walking along dark city streets, or maybe it was a cemetery. At some point, I noticed that Flib’s family had continued on to the next room of the shop, and I still had to go back and buy something for my dad! I felt selfish for forgetting about his birthday while being so caught up in shopping for things in my own field of interest.

I was then back with Flib’s family. We were getting lunch (or was it sorbet?) at a restaurant, taking the food out onto a patio to eat. Wherever this place was, it was a large city, maybe New York, though it had no recognizable landmarks. I could hear a low-flying plane overhead, and said to D that the sound made me extremely uncomfortable (this is also true IRL, and also I should mention that I live close enough to an airport that I often see and hear planes at low altitudes). Flib’s grandma mentioned that, oh yes, we were near a military base, and they must be testing out some new aircraft.

No sooner had she said this than an aircraft appeared overhead across the street from us. I definitely wouldn’t call it an airplane, although it sounded much like one. It was more like a big metal cube, with a big round hole where the engine should be. It seemed to be packed with people, presumably military personnel, who just sat in and around the thing, no seats or restraints of any kind. It looked so unsafe that just LOOKING at it made me deeply afraid. The unit wobbled in midair before tilting on its side and descending out of view with a big CRASH. And then another, similarly shaped craft flew out, this one much more elongated, and painted a shade of blue. Like a flying cargo container, I suppose, but with one side exposed for people to sit with their legs dangling out. This one also crash-landed, but very near to the restaurant, perpendicular with/on the street.

I told Flib and fam that I was done, that I wanted to go home, that we need to leave. Even as we went back through the restaurant and returned to our cars (lots of other bystanders were also evacuating), I kept repeating that: “I want to go home, I don’t want to be here, I’m done, etc.” There were two cars parked, one being Flib’s and one being D’s. I asked them which car I needed to get into to go home. We all got into Flib’s car, and started driving away. On a long stretch of highway trimmed in neon lights, two hovering aircraft flew overhead in quick succession, in the same direction we were headed. They were a little like flying saucers, but with like a yellow glass base that glowed gold. A large black helicopter went the opposite way. I was aware that these were all military craft, and that we would die if we stayed near them (whether they were deliberately attacking us was unclear, more just that the very presence of military hardware was a threat).

We drove along a winding mountain road, passing a number of touristy locations (namely a group of trees carved with cartoonish faces). Flib decided to pull off at one of these stops because, “as long as we’re on a road trip, we’d might as well see everything.” Or something to that effect. I disagreed, but got out of the car. It was a clearing in a wooded area, like a park on top of a mountain. People were seated on benches. A restroom or gift shop was nearby. I checked my phone for Pokemon GO. An Articuno raid was ongoing, but would end in about 10 seconds. I asked Flib and D if they wanted to do it. D declined, Flib was interested, but by the time I tapped on the gym icon, the raid was over. Flib made a frustrated sigh at this.

As the first raid ended, another one appeared: Ho-Oh (who, at the time of writing this, is not yet in the game). I asked Flib and D if they wanted to fight it, and they both did not. I asked aloud to the other tourists, and they replied “NO” in unison. Two young men then appeared from one of the hiking trails, carrying a tray of three pizza slices. “Please help us!” they exclaimed with a grin, indicating that they wanted to fight the raid boss too. Thanks to some dream-weirdness, their phones were what was manifesting as pizza slices. No seriously, we knew they were phones and treated them like phones, but physically they looked like slices of pizza. This is the weirdest (and possibly most disconcerting) thing I’ve ever dreamt.

I told them that I could barely keep up on my own phone, much less try to play on three at once. But by now, more people were gathering, taking slices of pizza (which at this point were a whole pie). I joked with everyone, “oh, NOW you’re interested in playing, huh?” As we prepared to start the battle, one of the tourists, who I didn’t recognize but who sort of resembled a high school friend of mine (J), started introducing me to Flib’s family… as if I didn’t already know them. It was very confusing, because I don’t think any of us knew who this woman was.

Anyway, we were feeling good and about to start the raid, when D’s phone announced a news report. The phone’s voice was like Siri, but it spoke in a sassy, sarcastic way, like it was programmed to be a smartass to the user. The report said something about how people were being transported away with severe injuries, and how there was also some kind of wound or virus in the throats of some of the victims. My heart sank, and the fear returned as I woke up. These dreams both had a theme of being unable to catch a break from an impending violent death.

#dream #dream journal #long post #weird #disturbing

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