#this was insane of them thank you sky sports

[cressidagrey]

Such A Mystery - Part 7

Pairing: Max Verstappen x Colette Leclerc (Original Character)

Summary:

Max Verstappen fell in love at the ripe old age of 12 and never looked back.

Colette Leclerc really regrets posting that particular Taylor Swift Lyric to her private Instagram account, because it made George Russell go insane.  

The rest of the world has absolutely no idea that the Dutch Lion and Charles Leclerc’s twin sister have been a couple for 15 years and are expecting a baby. 

Warnings: 

Pregnancy, Mention of multiple miscarriages, Pregnancy complications, George Russell Bashing (he's probably really nice in real life but in this, he's the bad guy, sorry), Jos Verstappen

Author Notes: Huge thanks to @llirawolf for holding my hand through this. Happy New Year! Chapter count is continuing to go up, because I need to halve this chapter after hitting 6k. Should be 10 parts. Hopefully.

Arthur did eventually show up with enough McDonald’s in tow to feed an army. 

Fries, Nuggets and even including apology milkshakes.

“I am really sorry,” her little brother apologised to her, looking distraught.

Colette exhaled slowly, trying her hardest not to laugh at the sheepish look on Arthur's face.

"The next time, maybe you should think before you post. But then I clearly didn’t do that either,” she said drily.

“I mean, karma is the guy in the car coming straight home to me, did amuse me very much,” Vic said brightly.

Arthur blushed deeply, and ducked his head in embarrassment. He set down the bags of takeout on the counter, and then looked up to her to apologize again, his eyes wide like a puppy begging for forgiveness.

"Come here," Colette said with a sigh, holding out her arms for him. "I love you, ma petite puce."

"Colette!" Arthur complained with a grimace, but she just grinned.

"Oh you'll always be my little flea," she teased her younger brother.

"Oh god, don't call me that," Arthur complained, letting her pull him into a tight hug. He let out a long suffering sigh. "I said I was sorry!"

"I know you are," she said, patting the top of his brown hair, even when that meant that she needed to stand on her tiptoes to reach. "But the fact remains that you were an idiot before."

Arthur groaned in embarrassment and dropped his head to her shoulder in defeat.

"Eat your fries," his voice was muffled. "And please tell me you have some salad or something in the fridge so Max doesn't kill me for feeding you nothing but junk food."

"I do have some salad in the fridge," Colette said and ruffled his hair. "I'll eat lots of veggies, I promise. And I’ll even tell Maxie that I blackmailed you into getting me fries, if you want,” she suggested brightly.  

Vic just snorted. "Let's just get that back in the living room and we can put on Sky News and bitch about the commentators."

"You guys are awful," Arthur protested, but he was already gathering their food and following along obediently. "The comments on Sky Sports are not nearly as bad as you make them out to be..."

Colette rolled her eyes and instead collapsed onto the couch, wriggling to get comfortable, because her back was still killing her.

Arthur was also very wrong. Danica Patricks definitively was that bad. Colette could just stare at the train wreck in front of her.

"Vic. Why in the world has Sky Jos on there to talk about Maxie's anger issues. What anger issues?" she demanded. Max didn’t have anger issues. Who in the world had come up with that? This was utterly ridiculous!

Victoria stared at her. "You don't know?!" she asked, sounding shocked.

"Know what?" Colette demanded. "Enzo deleted every social media app in existence from my phone. Why do people think that Max of all people has anger issues?!"

"George Russell," Arthur mumbled. "He said some...things."

Things. George Russell had said some things. 

Colette sat up a little straight at that, her eyes widening in disbelief. "What things?" she demanded. "What did he say?"

Victoria and Arthur exchange a look.

"He may have said that he wouldn't want Max to date his sister because he is sure that his girlfriend is the one dealing with his anger issues?" Arthur offered.

"He. Said. What?" Colette bit out.

No wonder there had been this tone in Max's voice when they had talked this morning...No wonder he had sounded upset, when that George fucking Russell had pretty much accused him of hurting her. And of course, he hadn't wanted to worry her, so of course, he hadn't told her.

Victoria reached out and grasped her elbow, as if she worried Colette would jump up and attack the screen.

"You need to stay calm," Vic said firmly. "You can't get worked up, it's not good for you, and it's not good for the baby," she warned her.

"I will murder George Russell," Colette growled in response.

"No murder," Victoria said in a no-nonsense voice. "You can't kill him, he's not worth it. And you can't have this stress, for your health. And the baby."

Colette huffed but she was still seething.

Only to then have Danica Patrick pipe up from the TV Screen: "What are your thoughts on your son’s supposed anger issues?"

"He doesn't have anger issues!" Colette snapped. "I have anger issues right now! I am going to find George Russell and punch him in the face!"

Arthur stared at her with an ill-hidden combination of horror and fascination.

Victoria laughed again, but it was mostly out of surprise and disbelief. "Well, at least we know that your temper is firmly intact," she said dryly.

"I'm sure Max is going to loooove seeing you this worked up over this," Arthur grumbled.

Colette had a lot of problems with Max's father, but at least for once she actually agreed with him:

"On the circuit…as soon as Max lowers his visor, he turns into a lion. He is really motivated and the only thing that matters is winning. It was always in him. What I see in Max now, I saw in karting," Jos answered Danica's question. "But that’s not the same Max you see when he is at home. On the race track, he is a lion, but at home, he’s a teddy bear. He got that from Sophie. He’s very sweet, very gentle…Incredible protective of the people he cares about."

For the first time in recent history, Colette found herself agreeing wholeheartedly with Jos Verstappen.

"He is a teddy bear," she mumbled in agreement. "The sweetest thing on earth. And that bastard has no idea what he's talking about," she bit out.

"Of course Max is a lion on the track," Arthur said with a scoff. "We've witnessed that ourselves. Everyone in the paddock knows that Max is a machine when he's in his race car, but George has his head up his ass if he thinks that Max is aggressive off the circuit."

"We all know that Maxie is the gentlest, most generous person out there," Victoria agreed, shaking her head. "George Russell is clearly jealous and is making stuff up just to get attention."

Colette just huffed.

"So you don't think he has anger issues?" Danica Patrick pushed.

"What kind of a stupid question is that?" Colette grumbled in response, her shoulders taut with anger.

Arthur laughed and Victoria squeezed her arm.

"No," Jos answered flatly.

Danica Patrick, who was clearly fishing for a different reply, seemed a little thrown by the firm response. But she rallied quickly enough to pivot: "And what can you tell us about your son’s relationship with Colette Leclerc?"

"Oh, come on!" Colette snapped.

"They have been together for a very long time," Jos replied simply, his accent strong as ever. "…since back in Karting. I don’t think anybody believed that that relationship would last, but they did prove everybody wrong."

The answer was unexpectedly charming and sincere.

Colette found herself blinking at that, surprised at how fond he sounded when talking about her and Max. Even Arthur was gaping stupidly, and it looked like Victoria was struggling not to choke on her drink from surprise.

"I think the great thing about Colette is that she understands his life, his career. She has a brother who does the same job as Max, so she was always incredibly supportive of him," Jos continued. "She is there for him. She supports him completely, and she’s been there for him through the good times and the bad. I don’t think Max would be the man he is today without her."

Arthur and Victoria stared at the screen with dropped jaws, stunned into silence.

"Is that Jos actually giving a heartfelt compliment?" Arthur muttered in disbelief.

“I think he is?” Victoria responded questioningly. This was certainly a new experience for everyone.

On the screen, Jos continued: "I have been watching their relationship for over half of Max's life, and Max really did pick the right girl."

"Your son hasn’t talked a lot about his relationship," Danica said leadingly.

"Oh, you won’t get anything from him," Jos said with a snort. "He’s very protective over her, always has been. Especially with her in her current condition."

Colette’s eyes widened and she immediately put a hand over her stomach in a protective gesture. 

"Fuck," Victoria cursed.

“Did he seriously just do that?” Arthur croaked. “Did he just tell all of F1 - no, all of the world - that Colette is pregnant?”

All three of them just gaped at the TV.

Danica Patricks looked like a vampire that had just tasted blood. "Her current condition?" she asked, her voice honeyed sweet.

"Yes," Jos confirmed simply. "The baby is supposed to come any day now. We’re all incredibly excited for the new addition to the family. I mean, it took them long enough, they definitely practiced enough."

He said like it was a joke. Like it hadn't taken them the better part of 3 years and 2 miscarriages.

Colette’s whole body had tensed, her heart clenching painfully in her chest as the words echoed in her mind: It took them long enough, they definitely practiced enough. Those words felt like a punch to the gut - like a mockery of all the pain and disappointment and suffering.

All the stress and anxiety and anguish that they had gone through. All the tears and the desperation and prayers for a miracle.

And all of it reduced to a cheap, dirty joke.

"I am going to throttle him," Victoria said, her voice shaking.

"Get in line," Arthur grumbled, looking equally enraged.

Colette just sat there staring fixedly at the screen, feeling like her whole mind had gone numb.

It was one thing when Jos made his snide little comments to them, but it was quite another when he decided to talk about that on international TV. He made it sound like their troubles to conceive had only been a matter of not trying hard enough.

It felt like a gut punch. Colette had always known that Jos had no idea how hard the last couple of years had been for them, but now, in light of his comment, it sounded like he somehow assumed it had all been their own fault.

They had kept both miscarriages quiet...had only shared it with a handful of people. She knew that Max had told Vic about it, but he had never told his father.

Her hands were shaking with anger. The urge to throw something - anything - was almost overwhelming as the words echoed in her head over and over: It took them long enough, they definitely practiced enough.

How could he have been so cruel? How could he go and announce it on international television and make it sound like it hadn’t been the hardest thing that either of them had ever been through?

It felt like a betrayal. Colette had never expected much out of Max’s father, but this? This felt like twisting the knife in a still-healing wound and pouring salt into it.

It felt like a stab to the back. Jos had no idea. No idea how hard it had been to keep the hope up. No idea how much it had hurt with every failed test and every lost dream. And no idea how much they both had longed for the baby that was growing within her.

And now he was just treating it like it had been a matter of not working hard enough, as if it had been an easy task and they had simply taken their sweet time to do something that came naturally to most people.

Her mind would have continued to turn into circles...if there hadn't been a sudden stabbing pain low in her abdomen.

Colette winced as the pain flared. It was a shock, and her hands immediately flew down to press against the source of the pain.

"Are you alright?" Victoria asked immediately. Colette clenched her teeth as the cramping pain seemed to grow even worse, before easing.

"Just...just a cramp," Colette managed to breathe out. "It's fine. It's fine. I just- it just startled me, that's all."

She tried to assure herself that it was nothing. Just Braxton Hicks - just the body preparing for the labor, the pain sometimes got intense. But something about it felt...off.

"Is that the first one today?" Victoria asked her. "You winced a few times this morning."

Colette thought back to this morning, recalling how she had woken up with a stabbing pain in her lower back. She hadn’t thought much of it then, since her muscles hadn’t been happy with her in a long time at this point - and it had passed pretty quickly after a few minutes.

"I'm not sure, I-" she started, her breath catching.

There was pain again, another stabbing contraction.

"Are they getting stronger?" Victoria asked, her voice sharpening.

The pain receded after a few seconds, and Colette had to force down the urge to curl up on the couch with her hands on her stomach as she tried to take deep breaths."It's nothing. I still have 4 weeks," Colette said with a shake of her head.

The words sounded like a prayer. Because she wasn’t due for at least another month, after all. This was just the Braxton Hicks contractions that her doctor had warned her about. The practice contractions that were supposed to help get her body ready for labor, nothing to worry about.

It was just her body preparing for the birth, that was all.

But the pain came back again, and this time, Colette couldn't quite suppress the gasp as she closed her eyes and tried to breathe through it.

"Colette," Victoria said, her voice sharp. "I don’t think they’re just practice contractions. The way you’re tensing and wincing...this is the real deal. I think you’re going into actual labor."

“No,” Colette said, her heart lurching in her chest. “No, no, I’m not…I’m not supposed to go into labor until January, this is- this is not supposed to happen.”

She had just hit her 36th week, and she was due at the start of January. It was far too early for the labor to start.

"I don't think the baby cares about that," Victoria said with a laugh. "Come on, we'll need to get you to the hospital."

"No, I can't be in labour. Max isn't here," she disagreed.

Colette felt a fresh wave of panic wash over her. The very last thing she wanted to do was start labor without Max there, and Max was currently in the middle of a race on the opposite end of the world.

“Where’s your hospital bag?“ Victoria asked her, all business. “Where’s are the car keys? Arthur is driving.“

“What, no!“ Arthur squeaked. Arthur clearly looked terrified, his eyes growing like saucers as he stared at them. "No - no, I don’t think I can-"

But Victoria was already rounding on him. "Oh yes,  you can. Just get the keys and get the damn car ready. I‘ll help Colette get her things, and you'll drive us."

The authority in her voice was intimidating enough that Arthur didn’t dare to disagree with her, and he nodded mutely and hurried away to look for the car keys.

Colette was torn between laughing at her brother’s expression and panicking over the fact that her labor was actually starting.

Just like that, she felt frozen in place a few moments longer, before Victoria snapped her fingers in front of her face. "Hey, no freezing up. We need to get moving. We need to get to the hospital, and your kid doesn’t care that it still needs 4 more weeks. So come on, come on, get your things."

It snapped her out of her temporary daze, and she managed to focus back to the present again. "Right, yeah," Colette mumbled, and she quickly went to get her hospital bag.

She had already packed it, just in case - but she had definitely not expected to actually use it.

Her hands were shaking as she picked it up, the whole situation still not entirely sinking in yet. Max was not here. She was going to have her baby without him here - that wasn’t how it was supposed to be!

But the pain came back again, and her body seemed to agree that there was no time left to waste.

She winced through the contraction, and Vic’s face tensed as she saw it.

"How are you doing?" she asked, watching her worriedly. Colette had to take a deep breath, trying to keep breathing as the pain faded out again. "I’m-” she started, but that was the same second that Arthur appeared again with the keys.

"The car is ready," he said, sounding very much like he’d rather bolt.

"Right," Victoria said, and she looked at Colette. "We gotta go. You good to go?"

Colette felt a surge of panic as the truth of leaving to go to the hospital finally sank in - she felt very much like her entire body had seized up. But Arthur was already waiting at the door with an expectant look on his face that did not look at all reassuring, and Victoria had picked up her hospital bag and was ushering Colette’s towards the hallway.

The contractions didn’t seem to care about any of her feelings, anyway.

"Come on," Victoria told her quietly. "We're gonna go and have a beautiful birth, and when you're done, there’ll be a healthy baby in your arms, okay?"

Colette was sure that her face had gone pale, and her hands were shaking as she slowly made her way through the hallway. Victoria led her the entire time, supporting her as they moved.

She was more than grateful to slip into the backseat of the Audi and her hands could claw themselves into the buttery soft leather interior.

“Are you sure we can’t wait for an adult?“ Arthur asked weakly.

“You are an adult. You literally drive race cars for a living,“ Victoria snapped.

Colette would have laughed at Arthur’s terrified expression in any other situation, but at the moment, she really wasn’t up to find anything funny.

“Just drive the damn car, Arthur!“ Victoria snapped, and Arthur flinched, his eyes wide as saucers.

A whimper escaped Colette as another contraction gripped her, and she curled up in the back seat, both hands clawed in the seat as the wave of pain ebbed away again. Her breathing was ragged, and she felt like she was slowly coming apart at the seams.

"Keep breathing," Victoria’s sharp voice came from her left side, and she felt a cool, smooth hand on her forehead. "Just keep breathing. You're doing great."

The words managed to cut through the panic, and Colette managed to gasp out a shuddering breath. “I-” she choked out, “I can’t…I can’t do this without Max, I-”

"You are doing it," Victoria cut in, her voice steady and sharp like a blade. "You are doing it, and you are going to be fine. Max will be by your side the moment he can, but you will make it until then. Just keep breathing and keep talking, you’re doing great."

[traveler-at-heart]

Doctor's In - Part 10

Summary: As you grow closer to Natasha and struggle with your family past, Wanda begins to doubt your relationship.

A/N: Aaah, I think this is very long. I threw in some fluff as an apology. But remember, not everything is black and white. Also, don't hate me, I just like where this is going.

------

Natasha: You missed the inferior venacava

Y/N: Come on, it’s elementary school. Not like the teacher’s gonna notice.

Natasha: Fine, but you’re getting a B- from me.

Y/N: Professor Romanoff, you’re too strict.

As the kids enter the dining room, you put your phone down.

“Where’s Mom?” you ask them, and they turn to look at each other.

“She was arguing with uncle Pietro”

“I’m sure it’s fine” you say, placing the food in front of them. “Let’s eat and practise your presentation for Biology”

“Ok” Billy agrees.

For a little while, everything seems normal until Wanda walks in, looking ready to kill someone.

“It’s absolutely useless speaking to him” she says, walking past you and into the kitchen. You follow her, leaning against the wall.

“What’s wrong?”

“He wants to go back to snowboarding. Risking his life for what? Some likes on instagram and sponsorships? You almost died trying to save him and here I am busting my ass cleaning after him. And he wants to die”

“Why don’t I talk to him? You try to calm down and eat something. The kids were worried about you”

“I’m not hungry” she shakes her head, but accepts your hug, leaning her head against your shoulder.

“Just try, for me?”

“Ok” she nods, kissing your cheek. You smile, and take your dinner out in the backyard, where Pietro is throwing a ball for Sparky.

“My answer’s still no” he says when you drag a chair and sit next to him.

“I didn’t say anything” you shrug your shoulders, offering Sparky a piece of your chicken. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m not quitting sports”

“Ok, that’s fine.”

“It’s gonna be fine. What happened that day was a freak accident. Lighting doesn’t strike twice”

“I mean, I guess. Except it absolutely can happen again. Listen, if this is your life calling and everything, I get it. Just try to understand your sister. What would you feel like if the roles were reversed? If she got seriously hurt”

“What would you do if you couldn’t perform surgery again?”

“I’d go insane” you admit. “I’m not telling you to quit. I’m just telling you to understand Wanda’s point of view. Plus, you still need to start physical therapy.”

You sit in silence for a while, eating and looking at the sky.

“I’m hungry” Pietro admits, and you laugh.

“Come on, let’s get you some food”

As Wanda prepares his dinner, you take the kids upstairs. They ask you a couple of questions about the model of the heart you helped them build with clay until they’re both yawning.

“Sleep now, boys” you close the door, watching with a smile as they’re already snoring.

Wanda is still cleaning the kitchen when you join her, and she smiles at you.

“Thank you. He’s being less stubborn now. Wants to start therapy next week”

“My pleasure. I’ll finish cleaning, go to bed” you say, kissing her temple. She squeezes your arm in thanks, but turns around as she remembers.

“Could you take out the trash?”

“Huh? Yes. I’ll do it, no worries” you answer absentmindedly, looking at your phone.

You spend a lot of time on your phone lately, Wanda thinks.

After cleaning up, you sit and practise for your own test tomorrow. Natasha told you they’ll begin to implement her mother’s technique at the hospital and you want to scrub in.

For that, you need a bunch of grapes and a sowing kit. Everytime you finish a set of stitches, you send a picture to Nat and wait for her feedback.

Nat: That one’s perfect.

You smile at that, proud of your work. You’re so busy texting back that you don’t hear Wanda come in.

“Did you take out the trash?”

“Oh, crap. Let me do that right now” you put your phone down and remove your gloves.

“Who are you talking to?”

“What?”

“I’ve been waiting for an hour for you to come to bed, and it seems like you’d rather be texting. Is it her?” Wanda says, clearly upset.

“Wanda, come on. I was practising to scrub in this week. It would be a pretty big deal if they pick me to be in the surgery”

“Please, it’s so obvious that woman will let you in just because she has a thing for you” Wanda scoffs.

“Oh, so you’re saying I can’t get in because of my skills?”

“That’s not even… you know what? Don’t come to bed”

“What?” you turn to look at her, frowning.

“You can sleep on the couch” she says, leaving the kitchen without looking back at you.

Un-fucking-believable.

Fine, whatever. You’ll sleep on the fucking couch.

You clean up your mess and finally take out the trash, going to your car for a cigarrette and a lighter.

As you sit in the porch, another text comes from Natasha.

You decide it’s faster to call her.

“Isn’t it past your bedtime?” she jokes.

“Nah, I was kicked out of the bedroom”

“What did you do?” Natasha asks, clearly amused.

“Why do you assume it was me who did something?” you want to sound offended, but after a beat of silence, you admit the truth. Or part of it. “I forgot to take out the trash”

“That’s not so bad”

“I guess not. But whatever, I’ll manage for tonight. Got a doble shift ahead of me tomorrow”

“Sorry, if I was there I’d be more than happy to take you in” she says in a low voice and you don’t know exactly what to say to that.

“When do you get here, by the way?”

“My flight lands at seven thirty”

“Want me to pick you up? We can have breakfast and then go to the hospital” you offer, feeling better at the prospect of having plans to catch up with Natasha.

“I wouldn’t want to trouble you”

“Not at all, I’m happy to play the part of private driver”

“Will you hold a sign with my name like they do in the movies?”

“I’ll try” you laugh, looking behind you. “Alright, I’ll go get some sleep. Night, Nat”

“Night, Y/N”

Pulling out a blanket and a cushion, you lay down, sighing and trying to get comfortable. A few minutes later, you can hear Wanda going out of her study, and you stay still, hoping she won’t come looking for you.

Truth is, you don’t want to talk to her right now either.

Not after she kicked you out of the room for something so insignificant.

So, you close your eyes and try to let go of the hurt.

Tomorrow will be better.

—

Next morning, you get up at break of dawn to get changed and pack your bag for the next 48 hours. Honestly? You’re happy to be at the hospital for two days.

“Want some breakfast before you leave?” Wanda offers when you walk in to get changed, and by the looks of it, she didn’t get much sleep last night.

“I’m fine” is all you say, looking for your scrubs and your phone charger.

“Y/N” she calls as you’re about to leave. You turn to look at her reluctantly, eager to just walk out of the room. “Have a nice day”

“You too” you say, without any emotion, going down the stairs and straight to your car.

The ride to the airport lets you clear your head, and you feel a lot more relaxed when you go down to wait for Natasha.

It’s not long before you spot her, walking out and looking flawless.

“My apologies in advance” is all she says as you approach her, and you look confused.

“What do you mean?”

“Natalia, wait for me! You’re always in such a hurry” a blonde woman, younger and shorter than Natasha comes right behind her, carrying three very big suitcases. “Are you our Uber?”

“Yelena!” Natasha scolds, switching to Russian. “I’m sorry, my sister has no manners”

“Hey, no worries, it’s not the first time I’ve had siblings fighting in a foreign language” you smile, introducing yourself to Yelena.

“Nice to meet you. Thank you for picking us up”

“Are you staying for the whole month?” you comment, struggling with Yelena’s bags.

“Yes, my mother arranged for me to spend some time learning at Stark’s Hospital. I want to be a Trauma surgeon and Natasha said they have the best one she’s ever met”

“Did she say that now?” you laugh, as Natasha blushes and gets inside the car.

“Why? Do you know them?” Yelena sits on the back seat, unlocking her phone to find the address of her new place.

“Yeah, they’re ok I guess” you joke, making Natasha roll her eyes.

“It’s Y/N, you dumbass” Natasha clarifies, which makes Yelena groan and curse in Russian.

“Hey! That means bitch” you recognise it.

“How do you know it?” Yelena asks.

“My girlfriend and her brother are always saying it to each other. Living together has regressed them to their teenage years” you lament, trying not to think about them.

Yelena is restless in the backseat, asking you to change the music until you give up and hand over your phone so she can play whatever she likes.

“Have any siblings?” Natasha says, massaging her temples.

“Two half siblings but I don’t really speak to them”

“Lucky”

“Natalia, that is so rude” Yelena mutters, singing along to American Pie. “I’m hungry, can we get food before going to the apartment?”

“We’re having breakfast and then going to the hospital. That’s what grown ups do, they work even if they had to fly in the middle of the night”

“Fiiiine”

As you park, Yelena jumps out, because she wants to sit on the second floor with a view to the promenade. You wait for Natasha, and walk inside with her to the restaurant.

“So, I take it I have a new student?”

“I’m so sorry. Fury was supposed to ask you first but she’s just so damn impulsive. Please don’t feel like you have to help her in any way”

“It’s fine. I’m guessing your mother’s behind it? I don’t want you to get in any trouble. And Kate could use some friendly competition”

“I really appreciate it” Natasha smiles, and you both sit while Yelena looks out the balcony, taking pictures of the sunrise.

Yelena asks you questions about your background and work experience. You think it’s just curiosity as she’s starting her residency soon, but Natasha can tell Yelena is doing a job interview in her own sneaky way. She’s always so outgoing and charming that people have a hard time believing she can be a little shit.

“Have you ever been to Boston?” the younger woman asks and you shrug your shoulders.

“No, never been”

“You’d love it, it’s so pretty, and our hospital has one of the best Trauma centers in the country. Of course, the issue is finding the right person to run it, right Natasha?”

“I guess”

“Oh, I didn’t know you had an opening” you comment for the sake of conversation.

“Well, yes, actually. Didn’t Natasha tell you? We’re actively looking for someone” Yelena says as if it’s such a big coincidence. “You wouldn’t happen to be interested in it?”

“Sorry to say, my girlfriend would not want to move to Boston. But if I know of someone I’ll send them your way. Who was your former head of department?”

“Rumlow. You know him?” Natasha says, wishing she didn’t. He was a pretentious ass.

“Yeah, he’s an asshole. We studied together and only one of us got to go to work at John Hopkins. Spoiler alert, it wasn’t him” you brag, making Natasha smile.

“Tell me more about your girlfriend” Yelena asks, which makes Natasha flinch.

“Don’t”

“I’m just being polite” she lies, and you have a feeling it is better to change the subject. So, you ask for the check, paying for the three of you and then driving to the hospital.

“I have to get ready for the next session. Behave” Natasha says, and then turns to you. “If she’s being bad, you have my authorization to kick her ass”

“Duly noted” you wink at Nat, walking towards the ER, where Kate is already waiting with some charts for your rounds. “Morning, Doctor Bishop. This is Doctor Romanoff…”

“Belova. I go by Belova” Yelena corrects you and you nod.

“Oh, that will make it less confusing. She’s gonna be working with us for a bit. If you could teach her some of the basics of our ER I’d appreciate it”

“Oh… ok” Kate looks between you two, and then walks behind you. “Sorry, am I getting kicked out as your resident? Did I do something wrong?”

“Not at all. Yelena is here to learn, as are you. There’s enough to do for everyone, right?”

You keep an eye on their interactions, noticing how Kate is a lot more uptight in the  way she keeps the ER than Yelena. The blonde moves around the hospital like she’s been there her entire life and it doesn’t come off as pretentious, but as second nature. Her mother probably always dragged her daughters along while she worked.

But, by the time there’s an ambulance coming along, you see her go into professional mode, talking to the paramedics.

“Male, forties. Fell off a ladder, was conscious but had a seizure and BP dropped” Drax says, and you move the patient to a gurney.

“Bishop? Belova?” you question them as the patient has another seizure.

“I’d administer lorazepam and rule out skull fraction and hemorrhage” Yelena says, and you nod.

“Very well. He’s your patient now” you nod. “Once you get the results, page me and Neuro”

Kate looks a little hurt at that, and you sigh, watching as Yelena stabilizes the man and coordinates with Barnes.

“She’s just here for a little while. And you need to be on your toes. ER is all about speed, Kate. Don’t sweat it”

“Yes, Doctor Y/L/N”

You pat her shoulder, going to check Natasha’s class. It’s already started and you know the exercises as she gave you an overview before anyone else. So you lean on the door, watching as everyone practises the sutures.

“Care to join us?” Natasha says and you shrug your shoulders.

“I’m on duty. Looks like your sister got her first surgery”

“So soon? Who did she piss off to get it?”

“Just my resident. That’s ok, though, I’m sure next surgery will be Kate’s” you look at Darcy, giving her an excited thumbs up when she shows you her sutures.

“Speaking of which, Fury has told me he wants Bishop and your friend Lewis in the first surgery” Natasha says and you nod, trying to hide your disappointment. “I’m really sorry, I wanted it to be you, but he’s doing us a favor with Yelena and we have to give something in return”

“I get it. There’s always a next one, right? Plus, I’m happy for Darcy, she’s an excellent surgeon and I’m sure she’ll do great” you smile at your friend. In that moment, your pager goes off and you sigh. “Gotta get back to it. See you around, Nat”

“Wait” she leaves the skills lab, following you into the hallway. Her hand rests on your wrist and you turn around.

“What’s wrong?” you say when you catch the frown on her face.

“I’m sorry, for giving you extra work with Yelena. I didn’t think… I was just saying you’re a great surgeon. If I had known my mother would do this I…”

“Nat, come on” you squeeze her hand, stepping closer. “It’s no bother at all. I’m happy to teach her whatever I can until your mother finds someone else back in Boston”

“You’re too kind. I might owe you a nice dinner after all of this” she smiles, noticing you haven’t let go of her hand.

“I’ll hold you to that” without thinking, your hand travels to her elbow and you give her a light squeeze. “I really have to go now” you say when you’re paged again. “Good luck with the surgery tomorrow”

“Thanks”

You smile back at her as you leave for the ER, finding Kate in the middle of chaos, with an accident involving three people.

“See? You got yourself at least two surgeries” you smile at her, overseeing the work. Kamala is already there, helping Kate with everything she needs.

“Heard there’s someone new” she whispers to the brunette as they stabilize a patient.

“Yeah, she’s the youngest Romanoff. I’m now competing with medical royalty for the best cases” Kate huffs, but shuts up when she catches you staring.

“She could be the Princess of Genovia and I’d still make her work for it, Bishop”

“What’s Genovia?” Kamala asks, confused.

“You’re so young” you sigh, feeling like the crypt keeper all of a sudden. “Take them to imaging and page me when you speak to Carol. I have to check on Yelena”

When you scrub in, you find that Yelena has made her way next to Tony, pushing Peter to the back of the room. It seems like she has a real talent for getting what she wants without most people noticing.

“Doctor Y/L/N, nice of you to join us. I thought you’d be with the rest of sycophants at Romanoff’s masterclass” Tony greets you bitterly.

“Doctor Stark” you try to tell him that another Romanoff is holding the suction tube, but he keeps ranting.

“Honestly, I can’t wait for this stupid training to be over. We have to pretend that we’re impressed by this, really? Stark Hospital is one of the top teaching hospitals in the continent. I’ve had applications from Yemen to study with me. I think it’s time we show the Romanoffs what it looks like to be at the forefront of innovation”

“Tony, I really don’t think we should…”

“Ugh, I get it. Natasha is your type. Redhead, green eyes, you have a crush. But honestly, I’ve known her for so long and I can tell you, she can be real phony”

“Honestly, Tony, just shut your mouth” you plead, mortified at everything Yelena just heard.

The blonde looks at you, but she seems amused.

“I agree with Doctor Stark” she says. “Natasha can be annoying. But then again, she’s my sister”

You could hear a pin drop after those words. Tony looks at you and you shrug your shoulders. It’s not like you didn’t try to warn him.

“More suction, please” is all he says, and Yelena leans forward.

“Is that ok, Doctor Stark?”

“Yeah. Peachy”

—

48 hours and six surgeries later, you feel completely beaten and ready to pass out.

The worst part is that you don’t even know if you’re gonna get some decent sleep when you get back home. Wanda texted you a couple of times, and you tried really hard to act normal, but all you want is an apology for the way she acted.

Unfortunately for those who knew you, you had a tendency to hold a grudge beyond reason.

So, you’re once again stalling, smoking outside the hospital when Natasha pulls over.

“Hey” she smiles and you wave. “Didn’t know you smoked”

“Only after a hard shift. Want one?”

“I quit last year” she shakes her head, sitting next to you.

“Congratulations. I quit every year” you joke. “Heard the first procedure went great”

“Yeah, there was a great deal of enthusiasm. Made me less reluctant to be here. And I promise you’ll be on the next surgery”

“It’s ok, I’m happy to wait for my turn. Good things come to those who wait”

“Speaking of which, what are you waiting for to go home?”

“I don’t know” you shrug your shoulders. “I just wanted a moment to chill before going back to reality, ya know?”

“If for some reason you end up on the couch again, I have a spare bed in the apartment” she offers and you laugh.

“Thank you, Nat” you watch as Yelena finally goes out to meet her sister. “Have a good night, you two”

“Bye, Y/N. Thank you for a great first shift!” Yelena says, excited. She was working as much as you did and for some reason she’s not looking disheveled or exhausted.

To be fair, you’ve been doing this for more years than her.

By the time you get home, all of the lights are out except the one on the porch. Thinking it might be better to stay downstairs, you drop your bag and plop down on the couch, like you used to do when you were living alone and came back completely spent from grueling shifts.

After a few minutes you hear someone walking down the stairs.

“Y/N?” Wanda calls and you sigh.

“Hey”

“I thought I heard you come in”

“Yeah, sorry” you sit up, rubbing your eyes. “It’s pretty late and I didn’t want to wake you up. Go back to sleep”

“Did you eat something?” Wanda ignores your suggestion to go back upstairs, sitting on the edge of the couch.

“Nah, I’m exhausted. Maybe tomorrow. Sleep is all I want now” you sink your face in the cushion, hoping that’s the end of the conversation.

“Come to bed” Wanda asks softly, her hand pushing a strand of hair out of your face.

“You sure?”

“Yes. I can’t sleep without you” she admits in a low voice and you smile.

“Ok, then. Let’s go to bed” you stand up, allowing Wanda to lead you to your room, smiling when she settles next to you.

You’re practically asleep by the time your head hits the pillow, and Wanda admires your sleeping form, wishing she could know what’s going on with you.

“I love you” she whispers against your forehead as she places a small kiss there.

She wonders if that’s enough to get through this rough patch.

—

Hunger is what wakes you up. If your stomach wasn’t protesting the lack of food, you’d stay in bed for the next eight hours.

“Hey, you’re up” Wanda greets you when you walk in the kitchen.

“I’m starving” you say, going through the fridge and hoping Pietro didn’t eat everything again.

“Want me to make you something?”

“That’s ok. I’ll get some cereal” you reject her offer, though you are dying for some of her pancakes.

There’s a beat of silence as you start eating, and then Wanda interrupts it.

“Did you get to scrub in on that big surgery?”

“Nope. Guess Natasha doesn’t like me that much, huh?” you try to joke, but it comes off as bitter.

“So, we’re doing this” Wanda sighs, standing in front of you. You keep eating, looking down at your plate.

“Doing what, exactly?”

“Arguing over her”

“I’m not arguing. There’s nothing to argue about. I’m just mad and hurt because you made me sleep on the couch before a 48 hour shift over forgetting to take out the trash” you say, crossing your arms. Now you’re not even hungry.

“It’s not about the trash. It’s about how you’re constantly on your phone, or spend more hours in the hospital and how you walk  out of a freaking room with her” Wanda says, raising her voice.

“Wanda, she knows I’m with you. We barely talk about personal shit. Hell, I don’t even know if she likes women!”

“She likes you, and that’s enough for me to hate her and this whole situation”

“I have never, ever, given you a reason to doubt me or my committment to this family. I can’t control if she likes me, but what I can control is my own actions. And Wanda, I would never cheat on you. It’s not who I am” you insist. “This is the last time I will defend myself over this subject. You need to figure out if you can get over it or not, because it’s getting exhausting”

She looks at you, and you stand up, washing your dishes. As you’re about to leave the kitchen, Wanda calls for you. You’re surprised to feel her clinging to you, her hands around your shoulders.

“I’m sorry” she says against your neck. “You know how he lied to me. I guess I’m afraid it will happen again. But you’re right, you’re not him. I’m sorry, please, Y/N”

Her voice quivers as she keeps pleading and all of your defenses drop instantly. You turn around, hugging Wanda tight against your body.

“I’m here. I want to be here. I love you and the boys and this is the life I want. Don’t forget that”

“I know. I love you”

You give her a sad smile when you break apart, watching as tears roll down her cheeks.

“Maybe we could… let’s go out tonight. Have a date for ourselves. I’ll ask Laura to take the kids for the night or find a babysitter. I just want to be with you” she asks, leaning her forehead against yours.

“I’m down to whatever it is you want to do” you promise, kissing her nose. “So, we’re good?”

“Yes, detka. We’re good”

And for a moment, you truly believe this will be the end of it.

—

“Where are you going?” Billy follows you, while Tommy stays glued to his mother.

“Ask your Mom, bubs” you say, looking over at Wanda.

“We’re going to the ballet. Would you like to join us?”

“No” they both say, running out of the room.

“Are we really going to the ballet?” you say, trying to not sound disappointed. It’s not like you don’t want some time alone with Wanda, but you’re still pretty tired and if you sit in a theater for two hours you might end up asleep.

“Of course not. But I’m not telling you just yet” Wanda kisses your cheek, taking your hand so you both go down the stairs.

“Have fun tonight” Pietro waves goodbye, Morgan and the children busy with a videogame.

“Kids, come say bye to us” Wanda asks and the twins run to your arms.

“Love you. And you” you say, blowing a raspberry on Billy’s cheeks and then tickling Tommy.

“Love you too” they reply, giggling.

“Love you three” Wanda smiles, kissing them before taking your hand.

“So, when are you telling me… you’re kidding” you say when Wanda hands you a piece of fabric to cover your eyes. You scoff, but tie it, and lean in the seat of the car. “How did you know that my perfect date is to be kidnapped by a beautiful woman?”

“Well, you did tell me you like to be tied up” she jokes and you squirm in your seat. “Maybe some other time we’ll try that”

“Tease”

You try to picture the road Wanda is taking but after ten minutes you give up, leaning back and humming along to the beat of the music playing in the stereo. Thankfully it’s your Beatles playlist, as your father always made you listen to them.

“If I fell in love with you, would you promise to be true, and help me understand, cos I’ve been in love before, and found that love was more than just holding hands” you sing, making Wanda laugh. Of course you know all the lyrics by heart.

“You have a really nice voice. You should sing more”

“Pass, baby. Can I take my blindfold now?”

“Always so impatient” Wanda teases you. “Fine, we’re here either way”

Cheering, you pull the blindfold down, blinking a couple of times to adjust your eyes. Looking out the window, you can see the lights of the amusement park that is close to the peninsula.

“Oh my God! I’ve been wanting to come here for so long”

Ever since you moved to the city, you had planned to visit with Darcy but work always got in the way. You knew Wanda had come with the kids in the past and you always talked about visiting again.

“Come on, let’s go” Wanda takes your hand, and you eagerly follow her to the entrance. You walk around, pointing at all the things you want to try. Without realising, Wanda is leading you to the ride you absolutely do not want to get on.

“Nu-uh” you step back when she turns you to the Haunted House.

“Oh, come on! Please? I can never go because of the kids, and I love haunted houses. Plus it’s in a cart so we’re not gonna be chased by anything”

“People pay money to get chased?” you shout, jumping away when a group of teenagers are wheeled between the doors of the ride, screaming. “Babe, come on. I’ll do anything to skip this one”

“Please? It will be fun. Ok, not fun for you” she clarifies when you make a face.

“Give me one good reason” you challenge her. Of course, Wanda decides to pull you into a kiss, and it’s so good it takes your breath away.

“I knew being this gay would get me in trouble” you mumble while she celebrates her victory.

As you wait in line, you try to get a look at what’s inside and watch people who leave the ride, talking and laughing. They don’t seem traumatized or crying. That’s good, right?

“Ok, no, I want out” you plead the minute you sit down, and the woman operating the ride gives you a curious stare. That makes you settle, and you sink in your small seat, where your legs can barely fit.

The cart is sent through the tracks and you’re engulfed by darkness, still trying to figure out if the first thing will jump from the left or the right.

“Hell, no” you scream, feeling something in your head.

“It’s just rags, detka” Wanda eases your nerves, looking excited for the next scare.

Now that you’re also worried about whatever touches your head, you miss the dummy that pops out on your right, flailing while something that looks like sausages spills out of its chest.

“Gross AND anatomically incorrect” you shout at it.

“You’re so crazy” Wanda laughs next to you, until something else jumps from a coffin and scares her.

“Please let it be over, oh, God why are there red lights”

You are wheeled into a room full of weird looking creatures, and a spray of fake blood almost stains your clothes.

“Should have worn scrubs” you mutter.

There are a couple of typical jumpscares, like the plastic bat that falls from the ceiling, or the cackling witch that almost touches you with its decaying hand.

“Let’s never do that again” you say as soon as the cart stops, jumping out and looking all disheveled.

“Mmm, let’s try the one where you walk next time we come” she says instead and laughs when you look like you’re going to pass out.

“You’re being mean”

“I’m sorry, let’s do something you want now”

Roller coasters and other mechanical rides have never been your jam, so you walk towards the carnival games. You try your luck at the ring toss, balloon darts and the fishing game.

“Ok, last one” you say, pulling Wanda to the milk botttle toss. You’re determined to win something for her, though she insists she doesn’t need anything.

“Ok, that was very impressive” she says when you throw the ball and it knocks down the bottle at the top. The second ball barely touches the rest of the bottles and you sigh, changing your stance. Before throwing, you look at Wanda and place your cheek next to her face.

“Good luck kiss?”

Your girlfriend blushes, but kisses you and walks back as you get ready to throw.

“Babe, I did it!” you shout, lifting Wanda in the air.

“Very nice, detka” she laughs as you put her down, turning to check all the stuffed animals that she can pick from. “Oh, I want the capybara”

“You heard the lady” you say to the man in charge of the stand and he hands it to Wanda.

As you get some food, she pulls it against her chest.

“I love it”

“I love you” you smile, kissing the back of her hand.

There’s a lot to pick from, but you settle on hot dogs and fries, talking about the book and Pietro’s physical therapy.

“What about your surgery?”

“What surgery?” you say as you finish your own food.

“Do you know when you’ll scrub in?”

“Oh, no idea. I know they’re having another one tomorrow, but the Chief’s the one making the calls right now, so” you shrug your shoulders. “Alright, I’m done. Want to go on the ferris wheel before we head home?”

“Sure”

Wanda was a bit hesitant because of the height, but once you reach the top of the ride and enjoy the view, she decides it was totally worth it.

“I loved our date night, thank you” you say, noticing how she’s getting cold and offering your own jacket. “Here, baby”

“Thank you. I’m glad you liked it, even if I made you go into the Haunted House”

“Darcy must never hear how much I screamed” you warn her, enjoying how she scoots closer, leaning her head against your shoulder.

The view is breathtaking and you enjoy it in silence, until Wanda speaks again.

“Our first birthday here, mom and dad took us to one of these amusement parks. We had been in the US for some months and I think it was the first time I thought we could have a normal life”

“That sounds nice. I’m glad you had them to create good memories”

“Yeah, I wish my dad was around to see the kids grow” she sighs. “And if my mother wasn’t so stubborn…”

“Uh… your mom’s alive?” you blurt out, and smack your mouth shut, mortified. “Ok, that came out wrong. It’s just, you never mention her!” you stutter, while Wanda laughs.

“We had… a disagreement. After everything settled in Sokovia, they moved back to this small farm. It was the life they had always wanted. But my dad got cancer and he made mom promise she wouldn’t tell us. I was starting my job at the publishing house and he didn’t want to… I don’t know, worry us?”

“I’m sorry, Wanda”

“So, yeah, by the time we knew it was too advanced and we didn’t get to say goodbye. I’ve had… some resentment towards her ever since. I think we deserved to know” she looks away and you let her take time to calm down.

“I get it, it happens all the time. Sometimes patients want something that goes against their family’s wishes. It’s a fine line, between wanting the best for your loved one and giving them the freedom to choose”

“Yeah. I know Pietro speaks to her because he’s a mama’s boy. But she hates flying and I don’t feel like I’m strong enough to go back to Sokovia… there’s a lot of painful memories”

“Maybe one day we can all go. Or find a middle ground. Whatever you want”

“My mom would love you” Wanda says and you laugh.

“Well duh, all the Maximoffs love me”

“Especially me” she says, kissing you softly. You smile against her lips and break apart just as the ride ends.

You agree to drive back home, while Wanda plays music from your car console.

“You have a playlist titled W?”

“Yeah, those are songs that remind me of you”

The first song she plays is Kiss Me by Sixpence None the Richer.

“A classic, and so romantic”

“I need to see the entire playlist” she asks and you hand over your phone.

“The password’s the day of our first date” you say. Wanda melts at that, and she’s scrolling down to check out all the songs -her absolute favorite is This will be (An Everlasting Love) by Nat King Cole- when a text comes through.

Nat: Got you a spot at tomorrow’s surgery :)

Nat: So I think now you owe me dinner

Wanda reads the text a couple of times, and her curiosity gets the best of her. To you it looks like she’s scrolling through the playlist, but she’s actually going through your conversation with Natasha.

It’s definitely more flirty on her side, but you’re not acting cold towards her. Wanda knows how friendly you can be, but it seems like on some level, you’re tethering between nice and flirty.

She doesn’t get very far, feeling like she crossed a major boundary. Your words echo back. You’re done discussing the matter and it’s all in her head.

Right?

“Everything ok? I know you don’t like Paramore but The Only Exception makes me think of us” you say, unaware of what is happening.

“Yeah, no. I think I ate too much” Wanda lies and you squeeze her leg, parking outside of the house. She lets you open the door for her and as you pay Morgan, Wanda goes upstairs to change into her pajamas.

It’s all in your head.

But when you go up, and are lookig at your phone with a smile, she has to bite her tongue and pretend like everything’s fine.

“Oop, let me answer this” you say as you get a call.

“Don’t be long” she asks, her voice small.

“Yes, my love” you wink at her. Going downstairs, you look behind you to make sure she’s not listening. “Hello? Yes. About that ring. I’m buying it”

—

Life is great.

Fantastic.

You bought an engagement ring and you’re proposing to Wanda.

As you enter the conference room for the staff meeting, you whistle, making Stark look at you.

“Someone got lucky”

“Yes, I got lucky by meeting the most amazing woman in the world” you smile, sitting down next to Darcy.

“Ugh, I hate cheerful Y/N, it makes me want to unfriend you” she jokes, but you just roll your eyes.

Chief Fury goes over the most important things for every department, and then reminds you the next surgery with the Romanoff technique is happening today, with you as assistant to Natasha.

“Oh, that’s why you’re so peppy” Stark rolls his eyes.

“Tony, don’t be such a drag. Live, love, laugh” you pat his back as the meeting ends and you run after Darcy.

“Hey”  Natasha meets you in the hall and you stop for a second. “Ready for today?”

“Yes! I just need to ask Darcy some questions” you lie. “Meet you in the OR”

You finally catch up to your friend and she eyes you suspiciously.

“Did Wanda get you pregnant?”

“That would be a dream. Our kids would be beautiful. Come here” you pull her by the sleeve of her lab coat. “Wanna ask me what did I do this weekend?”

“No”

“Darcy” you stomp your foot on the ground and she sighs.

“Fine, Y/N, what did you do over the weekend? But without the dirty details” she adds, raising her hand.

“I went shopping. Sort of. I actually made a call about something I wanted to buy”

“New toaster?”

“Engagement ring” you say, and finally, Darcy reacts accordingly.

“Oh, my God! At last! Show me!”

“Ok, so only a picture because it’s getting adjusted to Wanda’s ring size but here”

Darcy admires the yellow gold ring, white diamonds surrounding a big ruby in the middle.

“Holy crap, it’s beautiful. How are you proposing?”

“Ugh, that’s the hard part. I want it to be memorable but not over the top, you know?” you take back your phone, smiling.

“So, a flashmob is out of the question?”

“Very much so. If Wanda sees me dancing she won’t want to marry me” you joke, making Darcy laugh.

“I’m happy for you”

“Thanks, pal. And you’re gonna be my maid of honor, whether you want to or not”

“I can live with that. Congratulations to you and Wanda” she adds a little louder, because Natasha is walking towards you, and your friend still doesn’t like the way the redhead looks at you.

“Congratulations are in order?” the woman says, eyeing you curiously.

“No, she’s just joking about uh, getting a new toaster” you lie, trying to keep your proposal a secret.

“Alright then. Let’s save some lives”

“Sounds good” you smile, walking down the hall with Natasha.

—

For the first time in a long time, Wanda wishes there was more chaos at home. The silence doesn’t help with those spiraling thoughts about you and that doctor.

You’re performing an exciting surgery next to her, saving lives and doing something you’ve always dreamed of doing.

How can she ever compete with that?

Will she have to watch as you keep pulling back, until you come to your senses and leave her?

You had so much fun on your date and Wanda thought things would get better. If she hadn’t seen those messages, maybe things would be different. What would you even think if you knew she read your private conversations?

Her mind’s a mess, so much so that she doesn’t even notice someone’s at the door of your former house, knocking and looking through the windows.

The girl looks fairly young, 18 at most, so she figures it might be a college student looking for accommodation. But she’s insisting on knocking even when it’s clear no one’s around, so Wanda decides it’s better to check if she can help.

“Hello there” Wanda approaches the girl, smiling.

“Hi. I… I’m looking for my sister”

“Oh, you might have the wrong address. This house is empty. What’s your sister’s name?”

“Y/N Y/L/N”

“You’re Y/N sister” Wanda repeats, amazed. She’s never even seen a picture of the girl. All she knows are your half siblings names. “Jenny”

“Yes. Do you know her? Can I borrow your phone? I really need to talk to her” the girl says, and Wanda pays closer attention to her demeanor. She has a backpack, running shoes and a piece of paper with the address. No phone, or anything else.

It honestly looks like she ran away from home.

“Ok, sweetheart, come over and we’ll try calling her. She’s in surgery right now, but I’m sure she’ll manage to come over if she knows you need her”

“Thank you. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be such a bother, Miss…”

“Wanda. My name’s Wanda”

—

Things are going great. You look at your work and then at Natasha across the operating table.

“Almost as good as mine” she says and you roll your eyes.

“It’s pretty darn good, Romanoff”

“Fine. I’ll make sure to write those words down in my report”

Fury is observing from the corner, approving of your work as well.

“Nice job, Y/L/N. Now, I’ve heard your residents are drowning with all the patients in the ER”

“Ah, this work never ever ends, does it?” you sigh, going out of the OR as the rest of the teams cleans up. Natasha is behind you and washes her hands next to you.

“That was amazing, Nat, honestly. Thank you”

“Don’t thank me. You earned it. No one practised more hours than you did”

“I had a great teacher” you smile at her. “What’s next? Monitoring over the next 24 hours?”

“I can handle that, I know you got work to do at the ER”

“No worries, I’ll stop by later and check how everything's going” you pat her shoulder, smiling as you leave the scrub room. You hear Natasha call your name and you turn, thinking there’s something you forgot. “What’s up?”

“I… nothing. Good job out there”

You nod, and leave as you get paged a couple of times. Yeah, Fury wasn’t exaggerating, the ER is total chaos. There’s a school group fighting over a baseball match gone wrong -two concussions, a broken nose- and to top it all of, Yelena and Kate are arguing over who gets what cases.

“Ok, that’s enough. Belova, CT scans. Bishop, you’re monitoring the post op of my patient with Doctor Romanoff”

Typically, that wouldn’t be the most exciting work to do, but it’s a new procedure and Bishop’s more than happy to obey.

“Can I get the broken nose too?“ Yelena asks, dancing when you nod.

One of the guys with a concussion has a seizure, which prompts one of the teachers to scream. You have to kick everyone out, trusting Yelena will be able to stabilize him.

You lose track of time, going in and out of the ER and asking for consults with Ortho, Peeds and Plastics. It’s only after a few hours that you think about checking your phone.

Six missed calls from Wanda. Your heart drops as you call her back.

“Baby, are you ok?”

“Yes. Relax” she says, noticing how tense you sound.

“Come on, are you hurt? Are the kids ok? Six missed calls is something” you begin to ramble.

“Your sister’s here” Wanda cuts you off, figuring there’s no easy way to say it.

“Jenny? Did my mother…?”

“No, it’s just your sister” Wanda looks back, lowering her voice. “I think she ran away from home”

“Oh, shit” you pinch the bridge of your nose. “That’s just fucking fantastic. My mother’s gonna make a scene”

“I don’t think…”

“Jenny came to find me. Who do you think she’ll blame?”

Wanda stays silent for a moment. Of course it’s not your fault, but knowing what she knows about your mother, it’s pretty obvious that she’ll find a way to make you responsible.

“Can I speak to her, please?”

“Jenny, Y/N wants to speak to you” Wanda says, passing the phone to your sister.

“I’m so sorry” it’s the first thing she says, which keeps your mouth shut. “She canceled our trip, said I wasn’t going away to college that far from home. Y/N, she’s been so awful all the time. I just want to be away from her like you”

“Jenny…” you sigh. You honestly didn’t know. All this time, you thought the problem was you. You, who came to live with her new family and be an intruder into their life. The unwanted child that she was forced to take in.

“Look, does your dad know at least? I’m sure they’re worried about you”

“I left my phone back at home and took a bus”

“Ok, ask Wanda to text me your dad’s number so they’ll know where you are. I’ll see if I can get them to wait until tomorrow to pick you up, and we’ll talk when I’m home”

“Ok. I really am sorry” she says.

“I know, kid. I need to speak to Wanda again”

While she hands over the phone, you take a second to breathe, trying to ease your nerves.

“Wands, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to involve you in all of this. I’ll find a way to leave work and take her to a hotel or something…”

“Detka” Wanda interrupts you. “Stay. Do what you have to do. I can take care of things here. We’re a team. We do this together”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. We’ll see you for dinner, ok?”

“Thank you”

“Anything for you” she says with a gentle tone, hanging up.

—

It feels like it’s been a week instead of a couple of hours. The ER was packed, Natasha’s patient had some complications and now you had to prepare to face your mother.

“Hey” Wanda walks out the second she hears your car. Your face says it all, so she skips the part where she asks how you’re doing.

“They’re picking her up tomorrow at noon” is all you say, allowing Wanda to hug you, and placing your head against her shoulder. You breathe deeply, trying to ease your nerves.

“She’s playing with the twins now. Come on” Wanda takes your hand to lead you back inside, but you stay rooted in your spot.

“I haven’t seen her in ten years… I don’t even know what to say to her”

“Maybe she needs someone who listens and understands what she’s going through. Come on, you’ve got this, detka” she insists, careesing your cheek.

“Wanda, I can’t thank you enough. I don’t know what I would have done without you”

Those words, coupled with the look of complete adoration you’re giving her, is enough to soothe her soul and make Wanda forget all those fears about not being enough for you.

Jenny’s sitting at the kitchen counter, speaking to Tommy and Billy.

“They’re very curious about your sister”

“Yeah, well, so am I”

Hearing the door close, your sister turns around, and you stare at each other for a moment. It makes your heart ache, to see her all grown up. Last time you saw Jenny she was seven.

Setting boundaries with your mother came at the cost of watching your siblings grow.

“Hey, kids” you say. Tommy and Billy run to greet you, and you kiss their heads. “My minions”

“Hi” Jenny says, standing up and looking at you. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to get you in trouble”

“Let’s walk Sparky” you propose, grabbing his leash. The dog knows exactly what that means, and he starts jumping around. “We’ll be back in a bit”

“Ok, sweetheart” Wanda smiles.

“They seem nice” Jenny comments when you walk down the street.

“Yeah, they are. I’m very lucky to have them”

“I didn’t know…”

“I know, I’m sorry. I try to keep these things to myself. Your mother would find a way to ruin it”

“Of course” she says, fidgeting with her hands.

“I spoke to your dad. They agreed to fly tomorrow and pick you up at the hospital. He wasn’t mad, just worried”

“He’s not the one I have a problem with” she huffs. “Dad’s not even happy with her, but he thinks we’ll be traumatized if they get a divorce”

Sparky wants to chase after a cat and you let his barking fill the silence for a while.

“So what’s the plan here? You want to be away from her?”

“I just… can’t breathe anymore. She’s cruel and manipulative and controling. Sometimes I feel like the only way to make it stop is by never speaking to her again”

“Yeah, that sounds familiar. In my case it was easier, she was very eager for me to leave and never come back” you point out, starting to head back home. “I don’t think that will be the case with you”

“Well, maybe I should simply stop talking to her at all” Jenny says.

“Listen, ask your dad for support. Maybe there’s a way to find a middle ground. Because it’s not an easy thing, kid. You’re alone for a lot of the time. I can try and help, but with work and everything else… leaving home and cutting her off will mean a lot of changes. That’s all I’m saying”

“I know” she nods, her voice lower than before.

“Come on, I’m starving” you open the door, letting Sparky run towards the kitchen.

Dinner is spent talking about your sister, and she’s happy to chat with the kids. There’s an awkward pause when they ask about how you were growing up.

“Guys, Jenny was just a baby, she doesn’t remember a lot. What I can tell you is she cried every time she watched Finding Nemo”

“I did not!” she snaps and you hold a laugh. “I only cried because you played it all the time and I was sick of it”

“Yeah, yeah”

“Pietro cried when we watched Snowhite” Wanda intervenes and now, you do let out the loudest lauh.

“Hey, I’m just here minding my business, why are you attacking me?” he says, though he gives Wanda a playful smile.

It’s nice to see Jenny so comfortable, and definitely more relaxed than before. But you know that’s the way Wanda can get to people. She has the talent of making you feel like you belong without trying.

As you look at your girlfriend from across the table, laughing and chatting with your sister, you remember the ring you’re getting in a couple of days. And honestly, it doesn’t matter how you propose, you just hope Wanda wants to be with you forever.

Jenny helps with the dishes, and you recognise that eagerness to be useful in the way you used to clean every surface of your mother’s house, to at least be considered less of a burden. So, you offer to split the work.

“It’s fine, kiddo” you reassure her when she protests.

“I’m almost 18” she challenges you and you let out a laugh.

“Oh, yeah, to be 18 and think I know everything. I’m your big sister. You’re always gonna be a baby to me”

You both work in silence, until Jenny speaks again.

“I remember some stuff. Not a lot, but enough to know how unfair she was to you. But you were never unkind to me. Or Zach”

“It wasn’t your fault. Whatever shit that woman had going on with me was between us two” Jenny snorts at that. “Oh, fuck, pretend you didn’t hear me curse”

“You just did again!”

“No, fuck my life, I already owe like 30 bucks to the swear jar” you hiss, making Jenny laugh again. You throw some water her way, and you engage in a soap war.

“Nu-uh, no mess in my kitchen. I like to keep it clean” Wanda interrupts, scolding you.

“Oh, babe, come on. It’s not like we’ve never had se…”

“Y/N!” she slaps your shoulder. “Do not give this young woman the wrong impression about me. Jenny, we have a full house, but I made the couch as comfortable as possible”

“That’s ok, it’s way better than a bus seat” your sister smiles. “Goodnight and thank you for everything”

“Night, kid” you say, letting out a sigh when she leaves the kitchen. You turn to Wanda, pulling her by the waist and holding her impossibly close. “Thank you for everything. You kept calm and were kind to her. I don’t deserve you”

“You make it sound like I’m perfect”

“You are” you say with complete devotion, kissing her cheek. “I’m not ready for tomorrow, Wanda”

“We’ll do it together” she kisses your shoulder, but you shake your head.

“I don’t want that horrible woman anywhere near you. I’ll come back to pick up Jenny and hand her over to the parents at the hospital”

“Come back? Are you going to the hospital now?” she says.

“I’ll be restless and overthinking… I think only work can get me through this night” you sigh.

“Ok, if that’s what you need to do” Wanda agrees, but you catch the hurt in her eyes. “I’ll go back to working on some sketches, then”

She’s about to leave the kitchen when you change your mind.

“Can I watch you work? I think that would help me”

“Yes, of course” Wanda smiles, reaching for your hand. You pause before the door, kissing her softly.

“Love you”

Jenny is fast asleep when you walk past her.

You settle in Wanda’s study, getting cozy in the small sofa while she takes a seat and works on her drafting table.

Her soft movements lull you, and before you can tell, you’re fast asleep.

Wanda watches as you rest, hoping you can finally have a peaceful night.

—

The drive to the hospital is quiet.

Wanda said goodbye to Jenny with a hug, and a reminder that she’s always welcomed in your home.

But now it’s only the two of you in the car, and you don’t really know how to comfort her.

“If I were to go to college close to Westview… could I visit? I know you’re busy with work and your family, I’m just thinking…”

“Jenny, of course you can. You heard Wanda”

“I’m scared” she admits when you park, and you stay inside the car for a minute longer.

“Look, she’ll probably blame me. So, let her. Don’t argue or defend me” you advise. “She can’t hurt me, not anymore”

Jenny nods, and follows you as you leave the parking lot. Darcy is waiting for you in the lobby.

“Hi, Jenny” she greets. Darcy’s the only one of your friends who knows your family. It was during the only time they visited on campus and Darcy made sure your mother knew she didn’t like her.

“Hey” the girl greets, shyly.

“I have to make my rounds, but Darcy will spend some time with you in the cafeteria and then you can wait in the break room”

Fortunately, the night shift wasn’t so chaotic and Natasha’s patient seems to be stable.

Seems like Natasha went home right after you, so she might be back anytime now. Either way, you keep working until your phone rings.

“Hey, we’re here” Jenny’s father says as you pick up the phone.

“Ok, wait outside. We don’t want her making a scene”

“Yeah” he hesitates and you know he’s just as worried. You’re about to hang up, but think twice.

“Ed, take care of them. They’re good kids”

Jenny isn’t thrilled when you come looking for her. As she walks besides you, you pull her into a hug.

“You’re a strong kid. It’s gonna be fine” you say, and she holds on to you tighter. 

When you walk out of the hospital, your eyes meet your mother’s. How you wish you could say she doesn’t scare you anymore, but a part of you will always be a kid at the mercy of her twisted ways.

Jenny looks at you one last time before she walks up to her parents. If things were different, you’d never let her go back to such a horrible environment.

You prefer to look down until they’re gone.

Which is why you never see the blow coming.

Your mother slaps you across the face and your cheek and the skin around your eye burns.

“You poisoned her against me”

Even if you feel humiliated, you laugh, rubbing your face.

“Have you tried not being a fucking monster to your kids, for once?”

She aims again, but the slap doesn’t land. That’s when you look up, and watch as Natasha holds her wrist, glaring at the woman.

“I would think twice before doing this” Natasha threatens, and you figure her hold most be doing some harm, as your mother retreats her hand.

“You’re dead to me. Don’t ever try to contact me again” she hisses your way and you want to cry with relief. That’s the best thing she’s ever told you.

“I’m sorry” Jenny shouts, getting dragged away by her mother, Ed looking pissed at his wife.

To be fair, seems like her husband hates her guts too. Not that it’s difficult to do so.

“Are you ok?” Natasha turns to you, her hand on your cheek.

“I forgot about the big ass rings she’s always wearing” you try to joke, but you’re skin is still burning and it’s hard to open your left eye.

“Come on” Natasha takes your hand, leading you through the hospital halls until she finds an empty room. Quickly checking for any medical supplies she might need, Natasha comes back to sit next to you.

“Wanna talk about it?”

“I’m ok. Besides the slap”

“Yeah, it’s gonna leave a mark for a couple of days” Natasha mutters, checking that the skin is only a bit reddened.

“Nice. It will match the one I have on the back of my head from when she threw a glass at me” you try to joke, but Natasha stays silent.

“Can you open your eye?”

“I think so” you make an effort, blinking a couple of times. Natasha holds your chin, inspecting your pupil.

“It’s fine” she says, nodding. “We should probably put something cold so the swelling goes down, though”

“Ok” you nod. Natasha’s about to stand up when she catches the tears threatening to spill over.

“I’m here” she reassures you, holding your face with her hands.

“I failed her. I should have known… I should have stayed to protect her. But I left, because it was easier…”

“It’s not your responsibility. You were a kid too” she says, catching a tear that rolls down your cheek. “You’re kind and sweet, and a wonderful person. You didn’t let that woman poison you. That’s what matters”

Her words hit you like a wave, so you close your eyes and breath. You’re about to thank Natasha when you see it.

It’s a very brief moment, but you catch it.

Natasha staring at your lips.

Her hands are still on your cheeks, looking conflicted on what to do next. Pull apart and pretend it never happened? Lean forward and kiss you?

Natasha knows you caught her.

And you haven’t pulled back.

Pull back, pull back.

Whatever you were about to say is interrupted by your pager.

911.

Of course.

“I…”

“Yeah” Natasha nods, finally dropping her hands and standing up, her back to you. You grab the doorknob, but don’t turn it in your hands, heart still racing.

“Natasha” you say and she turns around, looking hopeful.

“Doctor Y/L/N, there you are” Kate walks in, but her eyes widen as she sees Natasha across the room. “I’m sorry, there’s an emergency. An accident in the bridge, multiple people hurt. We’re called onsite”

“Get everything ready and page Yelena” you ask. Kate nods, leaving the door open.

“I have to…” you say, looking back at Natasha.

“Be careful” is all the redhead says, smiling at you.

“Thank you. For what you did back there” you remember, smiling one last time as you leave the room.

It’s all a blur as you get ready to leave, packing bags with medical supplies. Your mind is elsewhere, especifically in that room with Natasha.

Would something have happened if it weren’t for Kate’s interruption?

“Hey” Yelena calls for you, and you snap out of those thoughts.

“Come on, you two. Lewis is running the ER; be in constant contact to alert about upcoming patients” Kate and Yelena follow you to the ambulance waiting, and you sit across from the blonde. “Alright, Belova. Let’s see what you’ve got”

--

There’s a reason not everyone can do this job.

Your team steps out of the ambulance and walks into pure chaos. At least ten cars have crashed against each other, while a bus impacted the railway. 

“Driver of the bus lost consciousness. Crashed into the rail and other cars” Clint says as soon as you come into view. “We’re prioritizing the people on the bus, we don’t know how much damage there is on the rail and it can be dangerous”

“Kate, you can handle this, right?” you say, and the brunette nods, excited at the prospect of working solo. “Belova, you’re with me”

Yelena is overwhelmed, looking around at the people who are in shock or bleeding.

“Come on, we’re here to help, not stare”

“Yes, I’m sorry”

Clint’s team is helping everyone out of the bus and you walk up to the driver’s side. A car is blocking the door and he’s still unconscious.

“What do we do?” you ask Yelena.

“Check if he’s breathing”

“He is. And?” 

“Check his pulse. Then we…”

“Immobilize neck and spine, place him on the back board and carry him out” you say. “You gotta go faster, Belova”

An EMT joins you, helping with the maneuvers until you’re out of the bus. 

“Flail chest and hypoxia. I’m starting BVM” Yelena says, pulling out the equipment. She makes sure everything is in place before the ambulance leaves for Stark Hospital.

You keep working on more people, and the less critical injuries are redirected to Westview Medical Center. When you’re almost done, Kate asks for your help and you leave Yelena checking the vitals of an elderly man.

The blonde is exhausted, leaning against the railway and watching you work with Kate. The brunette has a lot more confidence in her movements and decisions, and Yelena tries to think that some day she’ll manage to be at that level of skill. As she looks down to the bridge, she notices a motorcycle. Leaning forward, she catches sight of a leg, noticing there’s a person trapped. She’s about to turn and ask for help, but you’re doing CPR while Kate struggles to stabilize a woman. The jump isn’t that bad, so she decides to go over the railing and land on the pile cap.

“Hello? Sir?” She shakes the man and searches for a pulse, but it’s obvious by his injuries that he’s dead. The question is how to go back to the bridge now. She tries to climb back using some of the loose parts of the rail, but she stumbles, making part of the structure fall close to her head.

“What’s that noise?” you ask, looking around. “Where’s Yelena?”

As you run around, searching for her, you hear a metallic crash and the splash of water.

“Yelena?!” you scream, looking everywhere for her. You spot her windbreaker stuck in the pier of the bridge. 

“Do you think she fell in the water?”

“I don’t think, I know” you say, your heart dropping as you spot her getting carried away by the current, still unconscious. “Tell Clint to hurry up, because I really don’t wanna die today” 

“Wait!” 

But you’re already diving, and the cold water leaves you out of breath. It feels like your lungs are on fire when you gasp for air, and you have to use all your strength to not get dragged away from Yelena. Her bag is helping to keep her on the surface, though she’s not awake and you have no idea how long she’s been in the water.

It takes you a few minutes swimming against the current to reach her, and by the time you do, you’re exhausted.

“Come on, Yel” you say, keeping her head above the water. You’re not gonna be able to keep this up for much longer, and the bridge is looking further away every time you turn around.

If you survive this, you’re gonna propose to Wanda the next time you see her.

But as a wave hits you and you struggle to keep yourself and Yelena afloat, you think that’s a pretty massive if.

--

Natasha’s not a team player, that’s for sure. But the ER is a mess, and she knows it’s all hands on deck. So, she scrubs in, working with Darcy and Barnes to help everyone that comes in.

“We got the last one coming,” Darcy announces, picking up the phone. “Shit. Romanoff”

“What?” Natasha asks, although she’s afraid she knows the answer.

“Your sister, something happened… Y/N dived to rescue her, they both got dragged by the current” Darcy says, holding the phone against her ear. “Ambulance is five minutes away” 

Natasha feels like throwing up. Those are the longest five minutes of her life, and Fury joins her as they wait for them to arrive. 

“Female, twenties. Unconscious, hypothermic. Intubated and started oxygenation” Drax says as soon as the ambulance stops. Kate jumps out, running next to the gurney and holding on to Yelena.

“Kate, where’s…” Darcy says, and you jump out of the passenger seat, holding a blanket. You’re freezing, but alive.

“Here. I’m fine. She didn’t spend that much time underwater, I got to her soon” 

“We need to stabilize her and raise temperature. You, stay here and let someone check you” Darcy says when she sees you getting ready to help.

Natasha is in the room with her sister, while Fury, Barnes and Darcy work. Taking a deep breath, you walk to the locker room to find dry clothes, and hopefully get a little warmer.

You honestly thought you’d both die out there, until Clint arrived in a boat that he stole from heaven knows where. Still, it was a close call.

Hopefully, Yelena will be alright.

Once you change into some dry scrubs, you notice there’s a gash in your arm. Sighing, you walk to a supply closet, looking for something to clean up the wound. Someone walks in and you turn around when the door slams behind them. Natasha looks at you, chest heaving.

“Is Yelena…?” you fear the worst.

But she doesn’t let you finish.

Natasha’s lips crash against yours, holding you by the neck and inviting you to explore her mouth. All you feel is the warmth of her body against yours, the passion she’s pouring into the kiss intoxicating and clouding your mind. Your hand goes around her waist to pull her closer…

Wanda.

The thought makes you open your eyes, and you pull back, out of breath. Natasha’s still holding on to you, and you almost get lost on her green eyes when someone else walks in.

Carol looks between you two, and Natasha turns around, hiding her face.

“Wanda’s here”

Your heart drops. Without looking back to Natasha, you leave the room, following Carol.

“Darcy called me. I was so worried” your girlfriend launches into your arms, her face against your chest. You try to control your shaking hands, arms going around her shoulders. “I’m so relieved that you’re ok”

In that moment, you turn your bodies around and your eyes meet Natasha’s.

You feel guilt, shame. 

And something else.

A flutter in your chest at the memory of her lips on yours.

No, you’re definitely not ok.

[kaylapocalypse]

NOVA

I met a boy in a field.

His clothes were strange— but not too strange—and some of his words were unfamiliar—but not too unfamiliar.

He had been standing in the grass and looking up at the stars. He clutched something shining and bright in his hand.

When he heard me coming over, he turned and grinned.

“Wanna see something great?” He said “Come back here in fifty years and stand right in this spot. A sun will die and this is the best seat in the house.”

His teeth were made of metal and his eyes were hard like flint.

“This is the best century, really. We read about them all, you know. You’ve still got all the good stuff…”

He breathed in the air and let it out with a satisfied whoosh. As if he hadn’t had the opportunity to do such a thing in a long while.

“Why do you look so glum? Come on, sit with me in the sun.”

He crossed his legs and settled down in a patch of heather.

“The sun isn’t out. It’s night.” I said. “And who are you? This is private property.”

The boy laughed.

“The sun is always out. The sun bathes the earth in rays at all hours. God, you’re so young! The schools were so bad back in the day, wow.”

“I’m literally going to call the police. You seem like a nice kid, but you’ve got to go.”

He snorted and rolled a flower between his fingers.

“Whatever lady. You’ll miss me. And it’s not like I’m going anywhere permanent style. Because this is—you know what. I’m not going to tell you what’s going to happen. You’ll deserve it. Ugh.”

He shook the blindingly bright thing he had in his hand and vanished.

—

The next time I saw him I was 32.

It had been ten years, but there he stood. In the middle of the field. Wearing the same threadbare sweater and trousers I’d met him in.

“Gosh it took you a long time.” He said.

“Who are you? What the fuck. Are you wearing metal dentures?”

The boy looked exceptionally offended.

“Metal dentures? Oh that’s rich. Coming from someone with unprotected decaying bone in their mouth. Thank god I haven’t gotten hurt out here. What would you have tried to do? Cure a broken arm with bloodletting or burned a witch? I should have brought my own first aid kit just in case I have to deal with these primitive medical practices.”

That was a tirade I didn’t expect…

“What time are you from?” I asked.

He rolled his eyes.

“I’m not even going to bother with that.” He said. “Come closer, let me see you. You aged finkin’ well.”

I edged closer to him, but not close enough to let him touch me.

“it’s been like an entire decade.” I said suspiciously.

“I see they at least taught you basic math.” He snorted.

The closer I got the more differences I noticed about him. He looked like he was about the same age, but his clothes were a little thinner, a little more ragged. He had circles beneath his eyes and his skin had a grayish tinge.

“Are you okay?”

He looked at me like I was insane.

“Of course I’m not okay. Clearly, we’re from different times. Clearly I’m from the future. If you were from the future, would you go back to the dark ages to wallow with your ancestors in the mud for fun? I can’t talk to you about this. It’s not like you can do anything about it. Just sit down and look at the goddamn sky with me. This is supposed to be romantic.”

I plopped down beside him and looked up at the stars. I knew I had groceries getting warm in the car, but I figured I could afford to spend at least five minutes with an ageless time wanderer —even if he was rude as hell.

“Okay, you see that dark area over there?” He pointed at the sky. I nodded.

“That’s the way out of this mess.”

“What mess?”

“Everything. All of the problems you have here. I think. I’m really bad at explaining this sort of stuff. I’m not like, the best at politics science or physics. That was more my dad’s thing. I was really only ever into sports.”

“What sport did you play?”

“Upjacket. It’s like a mixture of your baseball and your hockey. But the stakes are higher. You play in antigrav and the first person to score a point wins. It’s like… you start off in teams, but individuals win games, and the more individuals win on each team, the more money the team gets. It was fun. Back when they let us play sports.”

He grinned and looked up at the sky.

“I was gonna go pro. It’s all about agility.”

Suddenly the bright thing in his pocket started rattling wildly.

“Oh shit oh shit. Sorry. I’ve got to go. See you in te—”

He disappeared.

—

I took a train from New York all the way back to Michigan, then a bus out into the country.

The field was empty when I arrived. I sat down in the patch of heather and looked up into the sky.

My heels dug into the soft earth. I was 42.

After about 15 minutes he blinked into view with a hiss and a flash of smoke. The boy immediately bent over and vomited. He fell to his knees and gasped for a while, then spit hard to clear his mouth.

He was thinner than when I saw him last. And his sweater had some holes.

I took off my jacket and handed it to him.

He nodded in thanks and draped it around his shoulders.

“What is your name?” I asked gently.

“It doesn’t matter.” He said. “Nobody cares. Nobody’s cares who I am or why I’m here.”

“I care.” I said. “I have a son not much older than you back home. He just left for college. If you want you can come back with me and—”

“I can’t.” He shouted angrily.

His eyes burned dark and hot. He was sweating a bit, and his hands shook as they grappled the edges of my coat. Pulling it tight.

“I shouldn’t have… I shouldn’t have touched it. I should have left well enough alone.”

He wasn’t talking to me anymore, he was muttering and looking at the ground.

I shifted over so that we were closer together. I fished a pack of gum out of my purse and offered him a piece.

“What is this?” He looked scared.

“It’s gum. It’s a kind of candy. You just chew it and don’t swallow. It’s okay. It’s… Sweet?” I tried.

He unwrapped it and put it in his mouth.

“Gosh that is the weirdest… It’s like… My mouth was all dry before and I’m not thirsty anymore. But it’s just this strange rubbery…That is so…. I mean, thank you. I really appreciate it.”

He smiled. It was like he hadn’t done it in a while. The corners of his mouth looked like they weren’t sure whether to go up or down.

“I hope this isn’t too forward.” I started. "But do you want a hug?”

He blushed and pushed his hair out of his eyes.

“Of all the tarts in the world, I found a nice sentimental one with candy in her pockets and a wish to take me away.” He laughed. “You can have all the hugs with me you like. It’s not like there’s anyone else around to hug.”

He fit neatly in my arms. He was stronger than I’d expected. More wiry. He smelled like ash, metal and the salt of unwashed skin.

“Do you want to know a secret?” He whispered into the shell of my ear.

“We never did get flying cars or hoverboards. It’s not a lack of technology. It’s got something to do with magnetism. You can’t break the rules of the universe— just bend them. And hover boards? Them’s a rule breakin’ invention.”

I laughed. I laughed and laughed and laughed.

“You’re such a marvel.” I said when I was finished.

He grinned back at me. Brilliant and true. The moonlight shining off his stainless-steel smile.

“I could have been much more.” He said cockily.

“Are you sure you can’t stay?” I asked. “We have a spare room at my house up in New York…”

“No. Darling. You’re old as dirt, but I’m partial to you. I wouldn’t want to break your husband’s heart.” He winked.

I scowled. “Why are you so rude? And how old are you really?”

“You ask the worst questions.” He replied and disappeared.

—

I moved back to Michigan alone and went to the field every night for twenty years. Until my hair turned gray and the hike over wore on my knees.

I kept the grass green and tended the heather.

Like always, the boy arrived with a hiss.

He lay still in the grass.

He was thin and filthy and barely breathing.

I turned him over and pulled him into my arms.

The boy sobbed.

“I couldn’t… I couldn’t… I tried so hard.”

“It’s okay.” I said.

“It’s not. It feels like it’s been days, but it’s probably been years. I just keep spinning round and round and my own window is out of reach. Yours is the closest so I keep landing here on this stupid rock in the middle of the millennium. I just want to go home.” He curled himself up until he was very small.

The bright thing glowed through the pocket of his tattered trousers.

“What does it do?” I asked.

“I don’t know how it works. It’s either broken or half made. It was sitting on my dad’s desk. I just picked it up and shook it.  It pushes me through time back and forth dropping me in different times. It never stops.  I can urge it one way or another, but I can’t drive it or force it anywhere once I make it work. I’ve been trying to get home for weeks.  I just want to go home. I just want to go home. I just want to go home.”

He repeated it over and over until he fell asleep.

I rubbed his back in circles and stared up at the stars until the sun came up from behind the fir trees.

 When I reached down to wake him up, I realized that he would never wake up again.

There was nothing to eat in the void of time, but star dust. Nothing to breathe but radiation.

I buried him in the heather.

—

Ten years later I went back into the field.

Fifty years had passed.

I looked up into the sky.

After a few hours of darkness, light shot out from the black spot the boy had pointed to so many years ago. The noise shattered the sound barrier and solar winds swept the planet. The night sky bled with reds and blues and purples and white. And it was so bright.

[awritessomething]

Don’t know if you take requests but I really want a fic with Pierre where y/n is a presenter for Sky Sports or something and they start having an affair. Maybe they sleep together after his podium when his gf isn’t in the paddock and then it starts to become and regular occurrence

𝐏𝐨𝐬𝐭-𝐑𝐚𝐜𝐞 𝐈𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰𝐬 | pierre gasly x fem!reader

requests

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆 | Pierre’s girlfriend manages to not be in the paddock for his podium. Someone else steps in to do what she should’ve done.

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 | smut, cheating, swearing, protected sex, straight to the point, dom!pierre, sub!reader, doggystyle, slight degrading, missionary, oral m!receiving, hair pulling, no aftercare.

also yes I do take requests ty for leaving one 🫶

After a long and treacherous race in Zandvoort, Pierre managed to snag third place by 3 seconds. The Alpine team was going insane over his podium as it was the second Alpine podium of the season. He got out of the car as soon as he was free to do so and ran over to his team who were all there to congratulate him.

There wasnt much time between the moment he got out of his car and before the interview that he was about to have to do. There was a younger woman with Sky Sports who was there to work with him. Walking up to him with a smile on her face, she motioned for her cameraman to follow. Pierre turned to her and walked forwards to meet her halfway.

“Good afternoon, Pierre. It was a good race, right?” She asked with a smile. His eyes swept over her quickly, so quickly that it probably wasn’t even all that noticeable to anyone except for her.

“Yes, I mean third is always a good way to end so uh… I’m happy.” Pierre answered with a quick nod. Her eyes narrowed on him for a moment.

“That’s great. Can you tell us a bit about what you had to do?”

“Yeah.” Pierre licked his lips before telling her a bit about what had happened during the race and what he was thinking. She tilted her head slightly as she listened to him talking. Pierre stuttered for a second as he saw how she looked at him.

“Thank you. Congratulations by the way.” They finished up the interview. She glanced back at her cameraman to confirm that they weren’t filming anymore. He nodded and started to walk a bit away to give her some space.

“Did you like the race?” Pierre asked a bit more boldly now that the cameras were away.

“I did. You’re an impressive driver.” She whispered and swayed slightly.

“Thank you.” Pierre kept his voice quiet as well. They both had the same kind of idea as to what they might be doing.

“Of course. So, are you sticking around in Zandvoort for a while longer?”

“Ah, not too much longer. My girlfriend is waiting for me at home I believe.” Her brows raised, feigning surprise. She acted as if she didn’t know that Kika wasn’t there.

“She’s not here tonight?” She tried her best to sound shocked to try and fool Pierre into thinking that she didn’t arrive with these intentions.

“She is not.” He fell for what she was doing for just a moment but then he put it together.

“Too bad.” She tsked softly. “You know, if I was her, I wouldn’t miss a single race. I would want to be there for everything.” She said, shrugging. Pierre raised his brow and smirked.

“Would you be able to?” Pierre was a bit intrigued by this idea. She was a bit surprised that he was actually going along with what she was saying, but she surely wouldn’t be complaining.

“My job is to follow the races. I’m at almost all of them. It would be no problem.” She smiled up at him, a look in his eyes that he could recognize in pretty much any woman. He cleared his throat as someone called his name to go and do his other post-race duties.

“I’ve got to go.” Pierre turned to leave.

“Wait.” She called out. He turned to see her. She reached into her pocket and pulled out her card. “If you think of anything else that i might want to hear about… call me.” She handed it to him. He glanced down at it and then back at her.

“I will. See you.” Pierre held onto the card and then walked away. She watched him go before running off to go and do other interviews with other drivers.

Later that night, around nine at night or so, she was laying in her bed at her hotel. She was on her phone, just scrolling through her phone and occasionally texting a friend or two. There was a call that showed up on her screen from an unknown number. She picked up the phone and put it up to her ear.

“Hello?” She asked, a bit confused as to who would have her number.

“Room 321. Be there in five minutes.” Pierre spoke into the phone. She recognized his voice.

“Ill be there.” That was all she said and then hung up the phone. Everyone with Formula 1 was staying in one hotel. Every team, every media person, they were all in that hotel. Most of the drivers were out partying, but apparently Pierre wasn’t.

She got out of bed, slipped on her shoes and a jacket, and then walked out of her room. She put her hood over her head to hide her face and made her way to room 321. Five minutes later, she was there. Before she could even knock on the door, it was opening and she was being pulled inside.

“Anyone see you?” Pierre asked as he locked the door. She shook her head.

“No. No one.” She breathed out and looked up at Pierre with wide eyes.

“Good.” He muttered and then leaned forwards and kissed her. His stubble was rough against her face but she welcomed the sting. Her hands flew to his hair as he shoved her against the door, already reaching for the bottom of her shirt. “Jump.” He grumbled against her lips and tapped on her thighs. She did as he said and he caught her, holding her by her thighs. Her head fell back as he kissed her neck before tugging off her shirt and unclasping her bra.

“Pierre…” She moaned his name as he nibbled on the sensitive parts of her neck. Her back arched off of the door, chest pressing against his.

“Mhm..?” He hummed, not even pulling away from her for a moment as his lips moved to her breasts, taking one of her nipples into his mouth. She whined and her head fell to the side.

“Condom?”

“In my wallet. I’ll get it in a minute.” He sighed and then took her off of the door and carried her over to his bed. She laid on the bed and tugged off her pants and panties, watching as he took off his own shirt while getting the condom from his wallet.

“You were ready for this?” She teased him lightly. Pierre scoffed.

“You never know.” He smiled and went to take off his belt. She shook her head and moved forwards so she was sitting on the edge of the bed. Her hands went to his belt and she removed it for him, throwing it aside as she pushed down his pants. He stepped out of them, along with his boxers. His breath hitched as he watched her take the condom from his hands and then set it aside.

“Think you can wait for a minute?” She asked, looking up at him. Pierre shrugged. One of her hands went to his cock, stroking him a few times experimentally. His head fell back as he groaned.

He stood in front of her, hands resting on the back of her head as she took him into her mouth. Her eyes met his as she swirled her tongue around his tip before beginning to suck him off. His brows knit together as he closed his eyes. Pierre hadn’t had another woman touch him ever since he started dating his girlfriend. He forgot how good foreign touch could feel.

His hips thrusted towards her mouth and she closed her eyes as tears pricked at the corners of them. He held her head still as he began to fuck her mouth, head falling back as he did. She listened to the sounds that came from the tip of his cock hitting the back of her throat repeatedly. Her nose pressed against his abdomen as he pushed her head down as far as it could go.

With just a few more quick thrusts into her mouth, his cum spurted down her throat. She had her hands holding onto his thighs to stabilize herself as she swallowed around his cock, making him grunt from the odd sensation. Pierre pulled out of her mouth and looked down at her as she coughed.

“You swallow?” Pierre gripped her jaw and made her open her mouth. She opened her mouth and stuck out her tongue. “That’s what I thought.” He gave her cheek a gentle smack as she smiled up at him. He reached down and picked up the condom from beside where she was sitting and ripped the package open. She watched with interest in her eyes as he slid the rubber onto his cock.

He pushed her back onto the bed and then positioned himself over her. He knew he couldn’t really just ram into her, so he reached between their bodies and circled his fingers over her clit for a moment to just make sure she was ready. She gasped as she felt his tip press up against her entrance. Pierre looked into her eyes for a moment but then just decided to watch as he bullied his cock into her hole. A choked moan left her lips as she was almost about to run her hands down his back. He shook his head and pinned her wrists to the bed.

“There can’t be any proof that we did this.” He hissed. She nodded and any other thoughts left her mind as he started to slowly thrust into her. Each drag of his cock inside of her was perfect. Her walls were tight around him, molding to fit his cock perfectly. She could feel each vein, each little part of him.

Pierre pulled his hips back so he was almost pulling out of her completely, and then ramming back into her with more force until he was sure that she was ready. His hands gripped onto her hips as he leaned back. He pulled her hips flush against his. She shuddered.

His thrusts were rough and there was absolutely no sort of romanticism or friendliness in their actions. Just pure lust. Pierre had obviously done this before. The kisses that he had left on her neck had been rough, but not enough to leave any marks whatsoever. The grip he had on her hips was tight, but it was just borderline bruising. He knew how to do it just right. Her eyes rolled back into her head.

Pierre grunted with almost every thrust as he watched it knock the air from her. Her moans were muffled with one of his hands moving to cover her mouth. He wasn’t leaving any chances of them being caught and she wasn’t complaining. If anyone found out that they were having sex, both of their reputations would be destroyed. She would probably lose her job too.

They both knew the risks, but neither seemed to care as they fucked like animals in the hotel room. It must’ve been around 10 at night before the other drivers began to even start returning to the hotel. They were still going at it. His eyes met hers as he fucked himself into her still. She had lost count of how many times he had pushed her over the edge at this point. The only thing that she could see anymore was his muscles flexing in the dark room. The lights were off so that if anyone did manage to come inside, they wouldn’t be able to see what was happening.

Somehow, Pierre hadn’t managed to cum once. His stamina was evident from the long time they were able to go at it. Her cheeks were damp from the tears that had spilled from her eyes. As she was able to notice his thrusts getting a bit messier, she realized that he was nearing his climax as well.

“Fuck- I’m gonna cum.” He groaned out as his hips snapped into hers. Her legs were shaking uncontrollably around his waist. Her eyes met his again in the dark room. Pierre watched how her eyes seemed to widen slightly with each thrust, but then narrowed every time he was pulling back.

With a few more thrusts of his hips against hers, their skin met for the first time in a while. He came into the condom, she could feel the warmth inside of her. She fell over the edge for the final time that night. Pierre continued to buck forwards for a few seconds longer until they had both ridden out their orgasms.

Pierre pulled out of her and reached down, taking off the condom and tying it off before throwing it out. She watched as he did this and then walked across the room to put on a shirt and a pair of sweats. She sat up, catching her breath and running a hand through her hair. Standing up, she walked into the washroom to fix up her appearance. Pierre could be heard rummaging around in the room, opening the door to the balcony to let in some fresh air.

“See you at your next race, Pierre.” She said her goodbyes as she slipped on her clothes again. He nodded at her and then she left the room, heading back to her own.

That was how it all started.

After nearly every race for the rest of the season, they would end up in each others hotel rooms. If Kika wasn’t there, she was in his room. If she was there, he was in hers. It didn’t seem to matter anymore whether she was there or not, they were just always finding a way to be with each other.

After the final race in Abu Dhabi, Pierre found himself standing in front of her again. She had the microphone held up to him.

“Nice to see you again, Pierre. What did you think of the outcome of this last race?” She smiled at him as if their relationship was purely professional. They both hid what happened behind closed doors behind an innocent facade.

“Its not what I had hoped for, but it was a fine race. I’m excited for next season.” Pierre answered, leaning forwards slightly so he was a bit closer to the microphone.

“Of course. Are we expecting a great season from you, Mr. Gasly?” She asked, holding eye contact with him. He nodded.

“It will be a great season for all of us, yes.” He tried his best to sound humble. She laughed quietly at this.

“I’m looking forward to it.” She snickered. “I suppose I’ll see you next year. Congratulations.” The camera shut off and she turned to confirm it. The cameraman nodded as per usual and began to walk off. She raised a brow to silently confirm their plans for later on. He nodded. He walked away.

As expected, that night she found herself in his hotel room. She wasn’t too sure where Kika was, but that wasn’t her biggest worry. According to Pierre, she would be out for pretty much the whole night partying with the other WAGs.

Her face was pushed down into a pillow, muffling her screams as she gripped onto the sheets too. Pierre’s hands gripped onto her hips, pulling her to meet each thrust. He was not too happy with getting 13th on the final race of the season. She could feel that.

Pierre rammed into her from behind, gripping roughly onto her ass, watching how it moved as his hips snapped against it. One hand left her ass to move up her back and to her neck.

“Think you’re gonna be able to stay quiet?” He grunted into her ear as his hand moved into her hair, pulling it back. Her back arched and her eyes rolled back, lip trapped under her teeth. “I’m expecting an answer.” He growled.

“I- can stay quiet.” She choked out quietly. Her chest squeezed as she was fighting back her moans. Pierre nodded. His other hand also left her ass to clamp down over her mouth.

“Dont believe you.” He hummed against her neck. She was pulled back so she was pretty much sitting up straight as he fucked into her. His tip slammed up against her G-spot with nearly every thrust. Her clit throbbed and she sobbed into his hand.

If he was to let go of her hair, she was sure to collapse. That was just what he did. He released his grip on her hair and watched as she fell back onto her face, burying her face into the pillow again. His hand slipped underneath her to rub at her clit.

During their second or third time meeting up at night, Pierre had discovered that he took more pleasure in fucking her than with Kika. He wasn’t sure if it was from the roughness of which they had sex or whether it was the adrenaline that pumped through his veins from the thought of being caught, but something made it better.

His mind when he was fucking his girlfriend often just drifted back to her. He wondered how she might act.

His eyes were locked on the small of her back, watching how it twitched occasionally as he hit her g-spot. Her knuckles were white from how hard she was holding onto the sheets. He was worried for a moment that she may rip them. He didn’t know what he would do about that.

Pierre knew that he wouldn’t be able to last much longer this time. His stamina had seemed to go down over the last while. He could hardly contain himself with her.

As per usual, his thrusts got sloppier and he lost his rhythm. She could feel as he came into the condom once again. She moaned in satisfaction as it pushed her over the edge once more. After a moment of both of them riding out their highs, he pulled out of her again.

“Ill see you in a few months?” She asked as she got off of the bed, stumbling for a moment. Pierre touched her waist to help stabilize her. He didn’t need her getting hurt right then.

“I sure hope so.” Pierre muttered and then passed her the shirt that was now on the ground. She took it from him and slipped it on.

“Bye, Pierre.” She gave him a quick pat on the arm and then pulled on her pants before walking out of the door.

How was he supposed to go months without that?

[the-teufort-nine]

engineer x pyro x m!reader relationship headcanons?

pretty please and thank you!!

ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ Texas Toast x M!Reader Headcanons ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ♡ﮩ٨ـﮩﮩ٨ـ

♡- Pyro and Engineer were already together before you came along, having started dating in secret not too long after they started working together. (Not because they think their team would judge them, but because both of them know how strict the Administrator is about any kind of relationship.) Neither of them realized that they were poly until they saw you in the showers one day. After that, they were pretty much done for, and every new victory you helped them achieve or enemy you saved them from made them fall further and further in love with you.

♡- Pyro made the first move, surprisingly enough. Engie wanted to, but you kept making him feel too flustered to get his words out. Thankfully for all of you, Pyro is much more confident when it comes to voicing their feelings to a potential partner, even if people have a hard time understanding them sometimes.

♡- They asked you out by burning an enemy Spy that was about to backstab you to a crisp and then handing you a sweet love note asking if you'd like to have dinner with them and Engineer. The two of them actually put a lot of effort into it; buying rose petals, candles, fancy wine to go with your favourite dinner. (They may or may not have paid off Spy/Miss Pauling to find out your favourite dish.)

♡- Perfect gentlemen until the alcohol kicks in. Engineer ends up a little buzzed by the time dinner is over, while Pyro absolutely cannot hold their booze. The fire bug totally ends up snuggling up to you, while Engie pulls out his guitar. If dinner hadn't made you fall in love, getting serenaded beneath a star-filled sky definitely did the trick.

♡- You get many kisses before the sun comes up, and you definitely end up sporting a couple of love bites and maybe just a liittllleee bit of stubble kiss rash.

♡- Once you're official, expect plenty of quiet complements during battle and getting shown off to. Being in a relationship for as long as they have, Engie and Pyro have memorized all of the camera blind spots, and they will team up to pull you into them for quick kisses during battle. Early on in your relationship, Pyro isn't quite comfortable with you seeing their face, so expect to occasionally get blinded by a hard hat being placed on your head and tipped down over your eyes so that your arsonist partner can give you a smooch.

♡- Absolute gods when it comes to appreciating your body. Got muscles? Show off your strength, darling! Got a bit- or a lot- of a tummy? That's just more of you to love! Stretch marks? Engie's gonna be tracing them while y'all are cuddling. Freckles or beauty marks? Pyro has a marker out and they're making new constellations on your skin. Scars? Hell, who doesn't have scars in their line of work? Point is, they'll find things to love about you, no matter what you look like.

♡- When you three go out on the town, they definitely get jealous jealous if someone tries flirting with you. They know you're handsome, but that doesn't give people a free pass to flirt with their boyfriend! You should probably let this stranger down easy before they end up with a lasso around their throat or set on fire.

What, did you think these two weren't just as insane as the rest of their teammates? Hell no! If anything, Pyro and Engineer are even worse than some of them!

♡- You smell like bonfires, oil, and coffee. Forever. You cannot escape this.

♡- Engie's love language is gift giving, while Pyro's is touch and acts of service. You can expect plenty of little useful gifts and homemade meals when you're dating these two.

♡- Overall, I think these two would be very attentive, if kind of possesive/crazy, partners!

[sleepymarimo]

𝕤𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕒𝕣𝕞𝕠𝕣 (fantasy au!)

summary: you're to be wed in order to bring more greatness and glory to your kingdom. to narrow down your suitors, it's decided that they will participate in a jousting match. a particular jouster riding a reindeer and wielding three lances catches your attention. you really hope he wins... pairing: zoro x gn!reader cw: none (i think?), small bit of angst, but mostly some fantasy based fluff, helmeppo jumpscare an: thank you all for being patient with me! i hope you enjoy it. i don't really write fantasy so i hope it's alright! also why are there no gender neutral terms for prince/princess?! wc: 3.9k way longer than i expected it to be when i made the poll lol

the sun rises over strong stone walls, illuminating the beauty that is your kingdom. you're in a deep sleep, your expression relaxed. all of that changes when a multitude of royal attendants scurry inside, light flooding your room as the curtains are peeled open.

"good morning, your highness." one of them chirps, ushering you off of the plush bed. "today is the day! oh, aren't you excited?"

your eyes open and you need a second to adjust to it all, letting yourself be guided to who knows where. the light is blinding and disorienting, as are the hands on your back and shoulders pushing you towards the dressing room.

the day?

oh.

the day.

the fog in your head starts to clear and you register the commotion going on outside of the castle. the horns, the cheers, the utter liveliness of it all which contrasted with the dark pit growing in your stomach. with a quick sideways glance out a passing window, you confirm that today is in fact the day- the day of the jousting tournament which will determine who’ll take your hand and rule alongside you.

before you could even reply, another attendant, an older one who has been by your side since you were a child, grabs your hand and gives you a warm smile. "all the suitors will adore you, your grace. you'll make this kingdom so proud! whoever wins your hand is sure to be strong and worthy."

swallowing a lump of anxiety, you return her enthusiasm with only a small smile as you feign excitement. from there, you're prepared and pampered for the occasion.

multiple attendants step in and out of the lavish dressing room, carrying clothes and hair products and shoes and jewelry. measuring tape is wrapped around nearly every part of your body to ensure a proper fit, nothing allowed to be out of place for the big day. you're bathed and clothed and sprayed with an insane amount of fragrance.

hours later, when the sun is high in the sky, you're guided to the jousting grounds which lay just outside the castle.

armored escorts surround you, ensuring your safety and holding the crowds at bay. the many citizens smile and wave as you pass by. you return their gestures with polite greetings of your own, satisfied with their trust in you.

your eyes glance towards the large stone walls which surround the kingdom. tapestries line them, colored in your favorite hue and sporting the insignia of the kingdom. the jousting arena is bustling with nobles, clergy, merchants and citizens. on a platform, above the rest of the stands, is where your parents sit and await your presence.

they're sitting tall and proud, oblivious to the unease growing within you.

your steps are a little awkward as you make your way to your seat, one of your undergarments having been fitted a little too tightly. it was almost impossible to relax your muscles unless you wanted seams digging into your flesh. when you finally reach your seat, nestled between those of your parents, you give them each a respectful nod and put into practice those lessons in formality they made you partake in.

"mother. father." you greet, taking your seat. shifting, you take a second to find a comfortable position before sitting tall and placing your hands neatly in your lap.

your mother's eyes lighten up, a hand coming up to gently pinch at your cheek. "oh, don't you just look so darling..." she coos, humming in approval as she eyed your attire and hair.

crossing his arms, your father simply states your name as a way of greeting you. his focus is on the arena, which is still being prepared. the jousters aren't anywhere to be seen. presumably, they're in the stables adjacent to the arena and preparing their lances and steeds for the upcoming matches.

"this kingdom needs someone strong." your father muses, casting a glance in your direction. "be prepared to take the hand of the one who wins this tournament. remember, it's not just nobility that are participating- this was an open invitation event, free to any and all who deem themselves worthy."

feeling uneasy, you just nod. with a shaky breath, you patiently wait for the jousters to line up in the arena.

it's a half hour later when all the contenders are lined up on their steeds, lances up and sitting tall as they await the introductory announcement. you're stunned by the number of potential suitors. there were at least fifty. you can't blame them for wanting a shot at the throne.

musicians blow their horns, playing a welcoming tune, before a royal attendant clears their throat and begins to speak.

"ladies and gentleman!" they announce, their voice ringing through the arena. "today, we will be witnessing a jousting tournament which will decide who will take the hand of-"

"hold it!" comes a high pitched voice, sounding displeased and almost whiny.

the crowd's attention turns to a lanky looking blond man with a cleft chin, who sits atop a white steed. he wears armor that looks much too big for his scrawny form, his expression disgusted.

the crowd breaks into hushed murmurs and mumbles, recognizing the man. "that's prince helmeppo!" one of the bystanders exclaims.

he raises a hand and points it toward another jouster, his tone sharp. "that jouster wields three lances!" he huffs, eyes narrowing as he puffed his chest. "and he rides atop a reindeer instead of a horse! dear king, i believe that he is at an advantage and should be disqualified."

your brows rise at the, well, audacity of this man. it sends a shiver down your spine to think that he was a potential suitor.

the attention of yourself and the entire crowd then turn towards the supposed three lanced jouster, who looks tense. he wears a steel helmet with a visor, so you can't exactly see his face.

"huh?" he exclaims, caught off guard by the sudden attention. "why're you talkin' about me for?"

the blond laughs upon hearing the jouster's informal manner of speech. "oh, you're just a commoner! no wonder!"

the unknown jouster and prince helmeppo exchange verbal blows until your father stands up from his seat and puts an end to it. "enough!" he orders, the arena falling silent. he looks between the two men, eyes narrowing at the reindeer and three lances. "it is true that your style of jousting is...odd. it may put others at a disadvantage."

the jouster tightens his grip on one of his lances, his frustration evident.

"if it were up to me, i'd have you disqualified. however, it is not my hand you'll be taking." your father says, gesturing to you. everyone's attention is on you, including the jouster, and you squirm in your seat, your face warm. "your highness, make a choice."

your mouth feels dry and you focus your attention on the jouster. even though you can't see his face or his expression, you swear you catch a glimpse of his steel gaze from behind the eyeholes of his helmet.

"i..." you let out a sigh and straighten up, your voice firm. "i will allow the jouster to participate in the tournament!"

cheers ensue, and so does the tournament.

the matches are all riveting. the sound of steel on steel reverberates through the air. people yell in excitement, clap their hands and make it known that they have favorites. you're on the edge of your seat the whole time, but your focus is on him.

the jouster with the three lances.

his style is interesting, almost captivating to watch. he holds a lance in each hand and lifts his visor just enough to place the last one in his mouth. it gives you a glimpse of his strong jaw and nose, the rest of his face a complete mystery to you.

every match he takes seriously, not caring much for taunts or mind games. his posture is consistently strong and poised- a true warrior. you wonder if he truly is a commoner and not a knight in disguise.

he takes out competitor after competitor. unfortunately (and you don't know how), so does prince helmeppo. before you know it, it's the time of the final match.

the two men are on their respective steeds, staring each other down from across the arena as the announcer gives a final speech. the crowd is on edge, a good majority of them rooting for prince helmeppo while a designated few display their fondness towards the reindeer riding mystery jouster.

the announcer raises a horn, about to signal the start of the match.

however, before he can do so, the sound of thunder echoes throughout the kingdom. the crowd audibly sighs in disappointment, the pitter pattering of the rain drowning out cheers and music.

both the jousters lower their lances, their postures relaxing.

the king grunts in displeasure, rising from his seat and acknowledging the spectators, as well as the final two contenders. "the match will be postponed. we will continue tomorrow at approximately midday." he pauses, thinking over something before he goes on. "a celebration will be held in the castle to compensate for such a delay. you are all welcome to join."

your father's invitation seems to reignite the earlier enthusiasm, and the crowd slowly starts to make their way towards the castle.

guiding you back are your armored escorts, who urge you to return to the safety and warmth of the castle walls. while being guided away, you can't help but look back at the finalists.

prince helmeppo speaks with his royal attendants, commanding them to take off his armor and bring him some dry clothes. his attitude towards his servants makes your nose wrinkle in displeasure.

the other jouster, though, doesn't seem to have any attendants or other individuals with him. he doesn't seem to mind the rain either, patting his reindeer and feeding it... cotton candy?

you don't have time to question it, as one of your escorts ushers you forward.

in the castle, a grand dinner is held for the people and jousters. the whole banquet hall is alive with food and music and drinks. it's a little overwhelming having so many people come up to you, but you do well to stay strong and treat them with kindness.

it's made all the worse when prince helmeppo comes your way, giving you a smile that makes your stomach ache. really, how is this guy a finalist?

"your grace." he all but purrs, kissing your hand for a bit too long. "i look forward to winning your hand tomorrow. i can assure that i'll treat you well."

your laugh is forced, but he can't seem to tell. you quickly retract your hand and subtlety wipe it on your clothes. "you're too kind..." you tell him, voice strained. "i, uh, need to attend to some royal matters..."

with that, you scurry off.

since the festivities were so lively, you were quickly able to evade the attention of your escorts and your parents. with light steps, you navigate through the castle walls and sneak out via passageways used by the servants.

it's late when you finally make your way to the stables, finding solace in the silence. since most of the citizens were in the banquet hall, you didn't worry much about being seen. you remember prince helmeppo's words and shiver in disgust. honestly, you preferred the company of the horses at this point- at least they weren't as snobby.

as you walk through the stables, petting some of the friendlier palace horses, you hear a bleat a few stalls down.

your eyes widen when you catch sight of the reindeer, curiosity taking over as you carefully approach him. it looks just as interested in you, it's head tilting while it stomps the ground with its hooves. on the stall, the name 'chopper' is engraved into the wood. a piece of metal reflects the moonlight and you realize that one of his horns had, at some point, fallen off before being reattached.

one of your hands raises to touch the cool metal and you let out an appreciative hum when you realize just how sturdy it seemed. did the jouster patch him up? perhaps he was sweeter than he-

"what are you doing?" comes a familiar, gruff sounding voice from behind you.

the cool metal suddenly feels burning hot and you quickly pull away, holding your hands in front of you as a bout of nervousness strikes through your core. how did you not hear the sound of clinking armor? you don't turn around, not having the guts to do so.

"sorry!" you say quickly, clearing your throat as you revert back to your formal self. "i mean, my apologies, jouster. i was simply-"

he exhales, the sound rattling in his chest and seeming to echo in his helmet. "you don't have to do all...that." he says, referring to your scripted, overly formal words. "it's fine."

he seems oddly calm for being in the presence of a royal.

the muscles in your shoulders relax and you allow yourself to slump slightly. you turn around and, as you thought, he's still fitted in his armor and helmet. now that you were in front of him, you noticed just how massive he was. for a second, you're almost intimidated, remembering that you're alone and without any escorts.

"i... i didn't see you at the banquet." you state, curious to learn more about the enigmatic jouster. after all, he could very well be the one to take your hand tomorrow.

he shrugs, nonchalant as ever as he took a step closer to chopper and placed a hand on the reindeer's head. "went to a tavern."

his blunt response pulls a thoughtful hum from you, leaving you unsure of what to think.

when it came down to it, it was either him or helmeppo. as of right now, you just felt trapped. you knew that by this time tomorrow, you would arranged to marry one of them.

something about that thought has you feeling a little too vulnerable, enough to want to hide your face from him. you enter one of the empty stalls and rest your weight on the wooden walls, sliding down until you were sat on the floor.

you didn't care that your clothes would grow dirty. you didn't care that some of the hay was digging uncomfortably into your skin. your head and heart were too full for you to really give it much mind.

"why're you doing this?" you ask with slight resignation in your voice, hoping you wouldn't offend or anger him. "the title? the berries?"

for a second, he doesn't answer.

his armor clinks together as he moves, then you feel a pressure on your back as the wood gets pushed inward. you quickly realize that he's sitting on the other side of the stall, right behind you.

you're back to back, so close yet just out of reach.

the next thing you register is the sound of his helmet sliding off. his action is a little surprising and it makes your heart skip a beat. you really wanted to see his face...

"i don't care about any of those royal titles." he says with a hint of indignation. his voice is clear now, not muffled by his helmet. the deep and rough timbre of it catches you a little off guard. "the only title i want is that of the world's greatest jouster."

your eyes widen a bit, before your brows furrow. "so, you want the berries?"

he sighs in frustration, armor clanking together as he crossed his arms. "i don't want-" he stops for a moment, clicking his tongue and taking a deep breath. his tone is notably softer when he speaks, more calculated. "the arena where i learned to joust is being shut down. my old mentor can't afford it, so i'm doing this to get the berries and..."

from there he trails off, but it's pretty clear what his intentions are. you imagine all the other jousters in training, children who won't be able to practice their beloved sport. you can't help but feel a great deal of respect for the jouster, even if he seemed a little rough around the edges.

yet, the notion is also so over the top. becoming a king just to keep an arena running? he'd really be willing to bear the weight of being a royal, just for all the young jousters in training?

the utter absurdity of it has you chuckling ever so slightly in disbelief.

"somethin' funny?" he asks with an underlying note of exasperation, getting defensive.

"no, not at all." you reassure, finding yourself smiling uncontrollably. your voice softens, true admiration lacing your next words. "i think it's very noble of you."

your words stun him into silence. if you could see him, you'd have a clear picture of his clenched jaw and reddened cheeks.

some amount of minutes pass, the distant sounds of the celebration ringing through the air. your head races with thoughts about the future. this jouster had earned your respect, that much was certain.

with a sigh, you make your decision.

"i'll give you the berries." you say, determined and unwavering. "i'll talk with my father and have them sent to the arena.”

his surprise is evident as he quickly straightens his posture, armor clinking together in a frenzy. then, it's quiet. his voice cuts through the thick air, more gentle than you've ever heard it.

"why?" he asks, not understanding your intentions. he wasn't used to free hand outs, especially from royalty such as yourself. everything he had was earned, and he liked it that way.

"because you need it." you reply simply, digging your fingers into your clothes until your knuckles turned white. you realize that with this choice, helmeppo would ultimately be taking your hand. "you don't have to show up tomorrow. go home and help your students."

he lets out a small grunt, a hint of irritation and wariness in his tone. "and you?"

even though you know he can't see it, you shrug your shoulders. you resign to your fate, knowing that your happiness was never guaranteed. it's a role you take with a heavy heart, but you find some solace knowing that others will benefit from your sacrifice.

"i'm sure i'll get my happily ever after." you say with some self-depreciation, smiling at the ceiling. "eventually."

there's silence, then more silence.

finally, you hear the familiar sound of his armor shuffling together as he stood and made his way towards his reindeer companion. you can hear him prepare the reigns and open the stall door. the sound of hooves echo through the wooden walls as he guides the reindeer outside, but there's a pause.

"thanks." he says, genuine and grateful.

you bite at the meat of your inner cheek, keeping your voice strong. "you're welcome, sir...uh-"

"zoro." he interjects, sliding his helmet back on. "roronoa zoro."

"zoro." you echo back, smiling as you said his name.

he walks off, until you can't hear the sounds of armor or hooves. dropping your head, you let yourself cry.

the night passes slowly, time crawling by at a snail's pace. a sense of defeat is instilled within you as the sun starts to rise. when your attendants dress you, you even tell them to get you clothes which coordinate with the colors of helmeppo's kingdom.

the arena is packed, everyone eager to witness the spectacle. but you know what the outcome will be.

helmeppo is on one side of the arena, gracefully sat on his steed as he awaited the arrival of his competitor. when his opponent doesn't show up, spectators begin to murmur and gossip. after twenty minutes pass, there's no need to go on any further.

the announcer clears his throat, musicians preparing to play a closing tune in light of a winner being chosen.

your eyes close as the announcer begins to speak.

"by reason of absence, we have chosen to disqualify-"

"hold on!" comes a familiar voice, the crowd gasping as the jouster approached on his reindeer. his armor rises and falls, as if he's taking deep breaths. it goes silent and his next words are eagerly anticipated by many. would he make some sort of declaration? a noble speech of redemption?

his arm comes up to rub the back of his helmet as he clears his throat. "i got lost."

some spectators boo at him.

your breath catches in your throat and your lips tremble. he came back?

the exhale that leaves you is shaky, full of relief. zoro takes his place on the other side of the arena, steeling himself and giving chopper a solid pat on the side.

"i ain't gonna run from a damn fight." he growls, readying his lances. “gotta finish this the right way.”

helmeppo is more than displeased, already preparing for a win. he raises his lance and the spectators hold their breaths. the announcer lifts his hand and starts the count, then the two men charge at each other.

you watch as they get closer and closer, lances drawn, but as they're about to make contact, you can't help but close your eyes.

a metallic thud.

silence.

then, cheers.

when you open your eyes, a smile grows on your face when you catch sight of zoro sitting proudly on his cotton candy loving steed. his three lances are still poised and ready, his armor shining in the sunlight.

the announcer declares a winner and you're given permission to head down to the arena. you pay no mind to helmeppo, who lays on the ground and throws a fit.

zoro hops off his steed when he sees you approaching, tucking away his lances.

when you're in front of him, your voice is barely above a whisper, trembling and just loud enough for him to hear. "thank you. you could've just taken the berries… you didn’t have to-”

he huffs out a laugh, hands coming up to remove his helmet. your expression falters in awe. that's what was underneath the whole time?

"yeah, well, you don't make bein' royalty seem so bad." he coolly replies, rolling out his shoulders with a gruff exhale. "and i sure as hell wouldn't wanna marry that dolt of a prince."

his moss-green hair is slightly slicked back from the helmet, a light sheen of sweat on his face. you meet his steel gaze, warmth spreading in your chest. your eyes trail over his face and he seems to sense your surprise, a slight smirk tugging at the corner of his lips.

"think i'll make a good king?" he asks, a tad smug as he tucked his helmet under one of his arms.

his question has you letting out a laugh, your worries dissipating into nothing but excitement for the future. "i think we can make it work, your highness."

he rolls his eye and extends a hand toward you, palm facing upwards. you take it and he offers you a lopsided grin, giving your hand a quick squeeze. his gaze shifts to your clothes and he lets out a playful scoff, bringing you closer.

"by the way, you'd look a lot better in green."

and you lived happily ever after...

thank you for reading!!

[iolaussharpe-24]

Barbie in the Mojave - Chapter Two

Thank you to everyone who supported chapter one! You're all lovely!

❤️Taglist❤️

(Let me know if you want to be added or taken off for chapter three. No feelings will be hurt.)

@waywardrose, @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction, @lunar-ghoulie, @ominoose, @reallyrallyauthor

@steven-grants-world, @clemdango04, @have-you-seen-my-sanity, @missdictatorme, @angelitawings

@outey-spacey, @autismsupermusicalassassin, @mandytrekkie

Feel free to ask questions about anything as well. I'm happy to talk about my process with anyone that's interested.

Chapter Two: Bad Smells and Worse Ideas

Barbie and Ken stopped and sat down, exhausted. Both of them were tired and panting. Both of them had sore feet (though Barbie’s were considerably worse because of her heels). Both of them were soaked in water despite never being anywhere near water. Both of them were mourning their perfectly styled hair. Ken’s was drenched and stuck to his forehead, dripping in front of his eyes. Barbie’s had gotten frizzy and wild, sitting on her head like one of the dried out brown bushes they walked past. Her headband wasn’t doing much to keep it under control either. Each and every blonde strand had gained sentience and turned against her.

They had walked a long way. The car wasn’t anywhere in sight anymore. It hadn’t been for a long time. The sea of sand had slowly but surely started to become solid rocky ground with dry plants sprouting from split stones and small animals and bugs scurrying into little holes at their feet as they came near.

The sun was setting behind them, making their shadows stretch out several feet in front of them as the air turned cold and the sky began to change colors overhead.

“Barbie, shouldn’t we have found the speedboat by now? This place is like an endless beach without the beach!”

“It’s called a desert.”

“Are you sure this is the right way?”

“I think so.”

“Well what did Weird Barbie say?”

“We’re doing what Weird Barbie said.”

“Wandering aimlessly?”

“For the last time, she didn’t give me directions! I was told to drive a sports car to a speedboat to a rocket ship to a tandem bike to a camper van to a snowmobile to roller blades and then I’d be in the real world where I’d find my kid by equally unspecified means! I don’t know what I’m doing or how I’m supposed to do it, but I want to get it done so that we can go back home and everything can go back to normal.”

He contemplated that for a minute, then smiled brightly. “And then, when we can do boyfriend girlfriend things together. Right?”

She nodded, just to make him stop asking questions. “Sure Ken…. It’s getting late,” she added with a sigh. “We should probably camp out… somewhere. Get some rest so we can keep walking in the morning. I was hoping to be done and home by now, but nothing’s been going right, has it?”

It was annoying. Very, very annoying. All of it. She felt like she was going crazy. She knew that there were going to be differences between Barbieland and the Real World. She did. It was a logical inevitability that only made sense. After all, they are two different worlds. Different realities that were affected by one another, but still very much separated from each other. It sounded absolutely insane, but it did, for some bizarre reason, make a weird amount of sense. Like old sitcoms with a supernatural or otherworldly element that everybody treated like a completely normal thing.

Ugh.

Ken was crouched down with a pile of sticks in front of him, hitting two rocks against each other repeatedly. Trying to start a fire. Fair enough. Just like how the sun had seemed hotter than they were used to in Barbieland, the night air, in turn, was colder. Even in the winter, when everyone tended to bundle up in thick coats and fuzzy boots, the cold never really affected them. This did. It was making Barbie’s skin break out into a thousand tiny bumps that gave her a weird tingling sensation as they appeared.

Must be another human thing. Another problem to fix. Like the cellulite on her legs. She shivered at that thought. Would this spread too? At least the cellulite was easy to hide. It was just on her thighs and was easily covered up as long as she wore longer shorts and skirts.

Their clothes sat in a heap near the place they’d decided to call their campsite, despite not having a dream camper or a tent or a backpack or even a sleeping bag – which was the absolute barest minimum of camping gear they could have possibly had on hand. They’d been forced to carry everything while they walked who knows how far for who knows how long and when they finally decided to stop, they’d just dumped everything unceremoniously in the dirt and used their skates, pads, helmets, and Barbie’s hairbrush to hold down their clothes.

She reached up and felt her frizzy tangles. Felt like a bird’s nest. Probably looked like Weird Barbie’s hack job of a haircut. So, just to feel like she had some control over something, she picked up her brush and started trying to tame the beast on her head.

“I think I saw a spark!”

Ken did not see a spark.

Barbie didn’t have it in her to tell him though. Instead, she praised and encouraged him to keep trying. Saying, “You’ll get a fire in no time,” and genuinely hoping that he would. Maybe that was what was so wrong with everything. Fear and negativity. Maybe, if she just tried to keep a positive attitude, and kept smiling, and tried to go on like her world wasn’t turning upside down, she’d manifest that reality and everything would go back to normal on its own. Or, at the very least, they might get lucky.

It took hours before either one of the two dolls could start a fire. And, by the time they did, it had already gotten cold. To keep warm, the two of them mixed and matched the clothes they brought to cover up as well as they could since they tiny flame they made wasn’t providing them with any kind of warmth whatsoever.

Barbie was in a pair of hot pink ankle boots that didn’t match her pants, and a baby blue long-sleeve shirt that didn’t match anything. Ken had closed his jacket, put on a pair of low waisted jeans, and swapped his sandals for his neon yellow roller skates, though he removed the neon pink wheels from the bottom to make it easier on him to walk in the morning.

After a few moments of sitting side by side to keep warm, Ken lifted his head and sniffed the air. “Do you smell that?” he asked, his brows furrowed.

“Smell what?”

“I don’t know. Something smells… bad.”

Automatically, Barbie turned her head away from her friend, breathed into her hand, and sniffed. Not great. Not terrible. But not great. Think that this wasn’t what Ken was smelling, she lowered her hand and sniffed as well. That’s when she noticed it. A sour smell in the air.

She scrunched up her nose at it at first.. and then realized that it seems awfully close.

For no real reason at all, Barbie lifted her arm and smelled the underside.

Oh. My. God.

She retched and lowered her arm so fast she was impressed that it didn’t snap clean off at the joint. Ken looked at her, confused, and she forced herself to smile and pretend that it was nothing. Even as she dug her nails into her biceps just to make sure that he arms stayed down in an attempt to keep the smell from coming out.

She didn’t understand what was happening to her. Why was her body doing all these things it wasn’t supposed to? First, she was leaking water, her hair was messed up, then she started getting bumpy, and now she smelled?! And that wasn’t taking the fact that she got lost or the wrecked car into account, or any of things that happened before she left Barbieland. This was all in the past few hours.

What could possibly be going on in this little girl’s life to change her like this? It didn’t make sense. How could anything be so wrong with a human that it punched its way through to another world just to drastically alter a Barbie in so many awful ways? It was like time and space and fate had it out for her or something! Worse than Raquelle at her most infuriating. Worse than-

Her thoughts were cut short by a sound in the distance. It was loud and shrill and, like so many other disembodied noises in the dark, was both familiar and strange. It sounded like a dog’s howl in the middle of the night, but it was twisted. It was wrong. And it wasn’t alone.

More howls accompanied the first like a choir singing a chaotic chorus together. One by one they sounded off, the noise echoing in the distance. Barbie looked out into the darkness ahead, unable to see anything at all. Ken did the same, though for a very different reason. He started walking away from her.

“What are you doing?!”

“Dogs! I want to pet the dogs!”

She stared at him, incredulous. “Ken! We don’t know anything about this place! And that doesn’t sound like Skipper walking a group of dogs to me. There’s no one around. We’re out in the middle of nowhere! This is a bad idea.”

“Hey, when it comes to petting dogs, there are no bad ideas.”

“If we were still in Barbieland where we know all the dogs!”

He wasn’t listening. He was just marching off blindly into the dark, his silhouette growing darker and darker. Blending into nothing.

“Don’t go too far! I don’t want you to get lost!” she called out desperately.

Ken didn’t answer. He might have been too far already.

Despite how annoying he could be, Ken was still her friend. She cared about him. Didn’t want him to get hurt. As of right now, he was the only piece of home she had with her. Well, him and a small pile of stuff she had been forced to carry since the car crashed, but she couldn’t talk to a cute skirt the way she could Ken.

She hoped that he had enough common sense to stay close.

Despite poor Barbie’s warning, Ken couldn’t see any harm in wanting to pet a dog. Or a cat for that matter. Or a horse. He loved horses. More, he suspected, than Western Stampin’ Ken did. Animals in Barbieland were always friendly and cute easy to handle. Always. And the Real World counldn’t be that different from Barbieland. It just couldn’t. Their world was made to resemble the Real World. To fix all of the problems the humans faced. That’s what the Barbies and Kens were made for in the first place. An unfriendly animal, especially a dog, felt nothing short of unnatural to him.

She was just being paranoid. Had to be. He’d never known her to be paranoid before, but he’d never known her to have any malfunctions either. This must be one of them. Yeah, that made sense to him. In fact, it made so much sense that it might have just been the reason why Barbie wanted to do this alone. She didn’t want anyone to see how bad this problem could get! He could understand that. If there was a chance that she could end up like Weird Barbie living away from everyone else in the Weirdhouse with all of the recalled Barbies and Kens, it only made sense that she wouldn’t want anyone to see that. In her position, Ken wouldn’t want that either.

Another howl sounds as he walks. That’s a good sign, right? Means he’s getting close. Like how being far away from something made it look smaller. But in reverse.

Excited, Ken walked faster. He thought about all the dogs he’d met in Barbieland and how cute they were. With their big eyes and black noses and little smiles. He even loved the old Taffy dog with her three puppies. Two of them had bobble heads, and the third one needed to be potty trained. That’s why the Barbie that owned them all always had a few newspapers in her dreamhouse. She always let him pet and play with them when he saw her.

Just as he was starting to smile from the memory, he stopped in his tracks. There was a dog in front of him. A little puppy.

It had tan fur and a cream colored underbelly. Big black eyes that stared straight at him. It wasn’t smiling though, that was weird. But the same black nose he always loved nuzzling his own against. It stood perfectly still, watching him as he watched it.

“Hi there,” he said softly, sinking down to his knees. He slowly held out his hand and cooed, “It’s okay. I’m not gonna hurt you. My name’s Ken.”

The puppy stared at him, then stepped forward, sniffing his hand. It yipped at him and two more puppies came out from around the corner to join the first.

In that moment, he just knew that Barbie was going to be jealous. He’d tell her that he found puppies and that he got to play with them, and she was going to look at him and say, “I wish I’d gone with you.” He just knew it. What else would she say? He was right. There’s absolutely no way that petting a dog can be a-

Grrrrrrrr…

That wasn’t a good sound.

Looking up at the rocky side of the plateau, Ken saw two more dogs. Fully grown ones. Their teeth were showing as they growled at him. The blond stood up straight, still smiling. “Hi! These little cuties must be yours.”

One of the dogs jumped down, still growling at him, it’s ears low, teeth bared. Then the other dog jumped down to join the first. And a third came from behind him.

His smile fell at bit as he watched. They reminded him of something… unpleasant. Something he’d seen in some of the older movies while at the theater with Barbie. Maybe she was right… maybe this actually was a bad idea. He hadn’t thought that was even possible until now.

Oh no.

Ken took a few steps backwards as one of the dogs started to snap at him, still snarling while it did. He raised his hands, showing the dog his empty palms. “Woah, woah, easy. Easy. I’m not going to hurt you. Or the puppies.”

A loud BANG! sounded from the darkness, echoing through the valley that Ken had been walking in. Almost immediately after, one of the dogs let out a pained whine unlike anything Ken had ever heard in his life. The others turned and ran away while the one that cried fell to the ground, a thick red liquid soaking its fur on one side. He’d never seen anything like it before and… wow… he was thinking that a lot lately, wasn’t he? The Real World was so different from Barbieland. Even the things that were familiar were different.

He looked down at the dog lying at his feet. It wasn’t moving. Wasn’t making any noise. It was more like the dogs back home that way. But in a bad way. A way that made him… not happy. Very not happy. It was like how he felt when Barbie turned down his attempts at doing boyfriend/girlfriend things to have a party with the other Barbies but it wasn’t that. This was different. Like everything else in this world.

He knelt down beside the dog and put his hand on it’s snout. It didn’t react. The fur was coarse and warm. But… it was getting cold. Fast.

He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t even know what was happening. All he knew was that he didn’t like the way it made him feel.

Dirt crunched under heavy boots behind the blond while he knelt over the animal. He looked up to see a man wearing a long coat and a hat standing there. The first person he’d seen aside from Barbie since they left home.

“You lost, brother?”

[shameless-army]

Get to know your mutuals | tag game

I was tagged by the lovely @borathae thank you so much for the fag💛💛 it's been so long since I last saw these circulating around here, feels so nostalgic!!

what's the origin of your blog title?

I was a child at the time (not literal) and I had lots of internal shame about what I was reading being raised in religion etc. I wanted to be shamelsss as I saw shame keeps me from many things. Hence the name. Gotta say i succeeded haha.

favorite fandoms: 

Army all the way. This is the only fandom i am a part of and will ever be a part of. 

OTP(s)/shipname:

I don't have one, but if I think really hard, do bong soon and ahn min hyuk and bangtan with each other

Favourite colour:

Yellow and pink atm

Favourite game

I am not a huge gamer, but I love all the cooking games, I love watching sims, and bts in the seom

song stuck in your head:

Who by jimin it's such an earworm 

weirdest habit/trait?

I love making poop jokes lol

Hobbies

Crocheting, knitting, singing, dancing, painting, streching, sketching, going on walks, looking at trees, looking at the sky, cycling, sculpting, cooking, eating, writing poetry, thinking about the world, debating, astrology, tarot reading, meditating etc

if you work, what's your profession?

I don't work yet, I am a med student 😭 

if you could have any job you wish, what would it be?

Albeit i wish we didn't have to work to earn a living, i would love to work with doctors without borders someday. If there was a world where you can just jump to different jobs, i would love to be a chef, dancer and classical singer

something you're good at:

I am good at all the aforementioned hobbies, I pick up things easily thankfully, unfortunately this ends with me having 27727181 hobbies.

Making people feel needed, comforted and welcomed is the generic thing I am good at

something you're bad at:

Lying, you can always tell if I am lying to your face. Taking care of myself, being my own cheerleader just fully loving myself lol. Spellings too

something you love:

Animals and nature and having time to do any of my hobbies. I also love talking to old people, and children. I love to ask questions the most, no matter who the person is i always have a why.

Making terrible jokes and flirting for sports.

something you could talk about for hours off the cuff:

Climate change, being healthy in mind and body, animals etc.

something you hate:

Overpopulation, we should contain our selves, we are not the sole species of the earth there are so many who came before us and should honor that, and not be selfish in hounding all the resources the earth have to offer. 

Religion, (all kinds) I am very anti religion and what it's done to others, if people keep their  views to themselves that would be great, but it rarely happens. (Remember people anti religion not anti people there is a difference)

Something you collect:

Kinks and trauma lol seriously though i collect yarn. And if I find some, i collect cool rocks.

Something you forget:

Everything except birthdays and important dates. Imo I am showing up where it matters haha

what's your love language?

All of them? Mostly physical touch and gift giving. But i believe we all have all the love languages

favorite movie/show:

Movie: the handmaiden

Show: Rn it's house MD (typical I know 😭)

Favourite food:

Everything under the sun. I am a huge foodie, I just don't tolerate cheeses and some meats well though :(

Favourite animal:

All of them 😭😭😭 mostly cats though 😭😭

are you musical? 

Idk I sing well accept that no, but I would love to learn electric guitar and violin.

what were you like as a child?

Oof, I was the child who you can always catch thinking, the amount of thought I had was actually insane. I was a huge loner though always daydreaming etc. 

favorite subject at school?

It was not fixed, I loved biology ever since I first studied it, i liked physics and hated maths until 9th grade, then hated physics and loved maths until graduation. I loveeeedddd literature though. So much !!!!

least favorite subject?

History and political science, but somehow I was good at it, talk about things running after you when you run away.

what's your best character trait?

I am very accepting, and i love very deeply 

what's your worst character trait?

I am very accepting and i love very deeply lol.

Also I feel like i take things too seriously, that is, I am very sensitive which bites me in the ass s lot especially with how the world is heading towards more superficial things. I have heard take it easy s lotttt. What can I do I am a passionate person.

if you could change any detail of your day right now what would it be?

Get my clinics cancelled so I can sleep 😭

if you could travel in time who would you like to meet?

So many people I have thought about it so much, and i have so many answers. Right now i wanna meet Akhbar the great, i want to ask him how he United so many people of different religions in his court. 

Also while coming back i would like to hug my younger self, God knows she needs that.

recommend one of your favorite fanfics (spread the love)

Ohhh all the fics i reread constantly are tagged under #rereading check them out they are amazing. Rn it's take home test by @versigny And for science by @boymeetsweevil (alltime fav) #My favourite is another tag you can find fics under:)

tagging (no pressure! I know it can be a lot so)

@angelicyoongie @wwilloww @yoonia @xjoonchildx @missgeniality @xpeachesncream

[eflen-n-reegee]

Caregiver Guardians Headcanons (Rise of the Guardians)

Jack Frost

He loves ANY kind of game; board games, chase games, sports games, nonsense games - whatever it is, he’s happy to play it with you.

He’ll take you flying with him, but be ready for midair tricks and teasing.

On that note: pranks. Jack plays constant pranks - on you, on the other Guardians, on strangers, he just loves teasing people. He often recruits you to help play tricks.

You will NEVER be overheated again. Anytime Jack thinks you’re getting overly warm, he’ll create frost under your feet or send ice creeping up the walls.

He’s not always good at toning down his energy levels, but if you need a quiet day he’ll do his best to oblige.

North

The workshop is ALWAYS open to you. You can play with the elves, bother the Yeti, and “test” all of the toys. It can get a little overwhelming sometimes (the workshop is a very loud, busy place, after all), so you’re also welcome to retreat to North’s office if you need a break.

In his free time he enjoys carving toys and figurines out of ice, and he then imbues them with magic so they can do impossible things. Nearly every time you visit, he’ll make you something as a gift.

North will use the snowglobes to take you all over the world. Not just to other cities or countries, but to magical places no human has ever been able to see.

He is very dramatic, and loves playing pretend with you. He tends to get VERY invested in his role, to the point where his work has to be put on hold. “I can’t check naughty list now, can’t you see I am sailing this boat?”

North gives the best pep talks. He never wants you to feel like you’re anything less than amazing, and he’s wonderful at calming any fears you might have.

Bunny

The week before Easter, the Warren is insanely busy; but the rest of the time, it’s a very quiet, peaceful place. Bunny’s happy to bring you down there whenever you ask, to play or have a picnic or just enjoy the scenery.

Whenever you’re feeling down he’ll paint a few eggs for you, with your favorite colors and shapes and patterns. Then he’ll hide them where he knows you’ll find them.

He has a dozen nicknames for you, all of them affectionately teasing - ankle-biter, rugrat, nipper, etc.

He HATES cold weather… but if you really want to go out in the cold, he’ll always join you.

Any time you get tired of walking, he’ll set you on his back and run. He’s very fast, and it might be a little frightening at first, but he would never let you fall.

Tooth

Obviously she insists that you brush and floss daily, but she finds ways to make it a fun activity.

She’ll happily hold you on her hip while she’s hovering or flying near the ground. (She doesn’t like to take you too high in case you get scared.)

Out of all the Guardians, she’s the best at handling scraped knees or bumps on the head… but her bedside manner takes a little getting used to. “Oh, I know it hurts sweetie, but look! This bruise is such a pretty shade of purple!”

Tooth loves sitting with you while you’re asleep. If it weren’t for all the work she needs to do, she’d stay with you all night - she loves seeing you so peaceful and content.

Thanks to her abilities as a Guardian, she’s able to help you remember the most important moments in your life. These memories aren’t inherently good, but they are the moments that helped shape the best parts of your character. She’s happy to share them with you whenever you need them, and she’s already ready to comfort you if some of the memories cause negative feelings.

Sandy

He can help ANYONE fall asleep. Clinical insomnia, stressful day, too much caffeine - Sandy can knock you out in a moment if you want him to, with guaranteed good dreams to follow.

But, if you like staying up late, that’s fine too! Sandy is happy to take you along while he makes his rounds, showing you the night sky in different parts of the world.

He creates various animals or objects to send into people’s dreams. He’s also willing to make little toys or creatures for you to play with.

Sandy is a great listener. If you need to talk about your troubles, your bad day, your personal worries, he’s always there. Afterwards, he’ll offer to weave you a dream where things are different. Or, if you just want to get it off your chest and then move on, that’s fine too.

On a slightly related note, he’s fantastic with quiet kiddos. While the other Guardians might try to fill up silent moments with chatting, he doesn’t care if you never say a word. Your company is alway enough.

[nicolesainz]

Within the limits (Ben Chilwell x Jenson Button x OC) Chapter 4

warnings: minors dni, 18+, sexual themes, angst and a hint of fluff

author's note: here is the debate: I still don't know who Chelsea is gonna end up with (spoiler, its gonna be mason, jk no)

Next chapter

"She's good, isn't she?" Mason nudged me while my eyes were still fixed on Chelsea's figure. She was looking nervous and anxious when this Jenson guy came up to us. Should I have intervened anyhow? Help her?

"She seems very friendly and sweet. Can't create a full opinion about someone I barely know, but I feel like we will get along." Last night before we came here, I was watching clips of her with Gary and Micah, fully blown away with her wit and knowledge when it comes to football. Doesn't act like a 'know-it-all', willing to listen to new opinions, knows her fair share of interesting statistics and facts.

"Trust me, you'll love her. Very reliable and sensible woman." Mason praises her into my eyes, although it's not very necessary given that she has made an incredible first impression.

Chelsea walks away from Jenson back to us with a worried look on her face that is trying to hide under a faint smile. How can someone switch her mood this badly? What is he to her anyway?

“So, have you been enjoying the tour? Am I a good guide?” Chelsea asks shyly and ready for her next move.

“Very much. On both levels!” I say to her, with an incredibly high pitched voice that causes Mason to giggle.

“Glad to hear. Because I need to have the same momentum for the next two years!” Suddenly her smile becomes insanely real compared to the pity one she had to pretend.

“No doubts that you won’t have the same energy and passion for football like you do for Formula One. Plus, our league is getting bigger and bigger.” Mason winks and caresses Chelsea’s arm softly, which kinda stung me, metaphorically speaking.

"Oh what? Did Jude Bellingham sign for Liverpool after being a few months at Real Madrid?" both of the guys roll their eyes at my comment.

"How does he do that? Getting the girls on and off pitch." Mason clicks his teeth annoyed.

"He's not my type, if that's what you suggest. And he's more than welcome to stay at Madrid for the Spanish girls."

"So what's your type? Any chance you take applicants?" Mason cheekily says eyeing Ben whose face had turned into a deep red color.

"Don't get ahead of yourself Mount." I am not gonna lie, Mason is very handsome but he is not the type of guy I would normally be attracted to. On the other hand Ben has a unique type of handsomeness. One look at him and suddenly my heart beats faster. I want to be held hostage by his eyes and the way he looks at me.

"Shall we head back to the garage? Do you guys remember the way back? Lando needs to show you the set up and I need to go back to my team for the pre-race show. But I will see you during the grid walk."

"Oh yeah, we do. Thank you Chelsea for the tour. We'll see you soon." Ben smiles and says in quite a rush, patting Mason on the back, who is clearly giving him dirty looks.

I waved both of them goodbye and made my way towards the Sky Sports team who was getting ready to go live in a few minutes for the pre-race action. Natalie, Martin and Jenson were there all reading their notes and discussing with one another.

"Look what the cat dragged out of the bag. What's up missy?" Natalie says, taking me into a hug. I simply adore this woman.

"Had to give the paddock tour to some footballers, England internationals and friends of Lando." I say in the most ignorant way so Jenson doesn't get too offended by my descriptions of them.

To my disadvantage, Jenson's look rises and winks playfully at me. I feel butterflies whenever he gives me the lowed look, fuck him. Well, that's what I will be doing after the race, that's for sure.

"Meeting your new colleges I see. Aren't we enough?" Martin cheekily replies and I respond with a pout, acting as if I was offended by his comment.

"No one can replace you. Two years will go with a blink of an eye." I say while putting on my headset while Jenson coughs loudly.

"Don't worry Martin. I will make sure she won't replace us." Jenson blurts out, knowing very well that this has a second meaning besides the response to Martin. Bastard.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Trying to avoid Ben and Mason was extremely difficult during the grid walk, despite it being the messiest part of the pre-race show. I tried to get my way into the pitlane with Ted but unsuccessfully.

Jenson was stuck with me through the entire time of the show, not letting go of my hand once. Well, only in front of the cameras or a few celebrities. Whenever I tried to switch my microphone hands, he could hold on to something else that I was wearing or was on me.

At some point he even tried to touch my ass, but I slapped his hand away the moment I felt his hand ghosting over my skirt. He has never acted so clingy before. Worst part is, when I looked behind to remove Jenson's hand from myself, Ben and I'd eyes locked and I turned more red than a tomato. Why? He gave a worried look and mouthed to me if I needed help but I gave him a thumbs up to reassure him that I am okay.

After that, Mason and his eyes were scanning me and Jenson the entire time, worried that he may do something like that again and prevent it as soon as possible. I couldn't possible explain to them the reason this was happening because then god knows what they'll think of me. Or even Jenson.

Thankfully the torturing part was over and Jenson headed back to the commentary box along with Nico and Crofty, as I made my way back to the pitlane followed with my huge headset and loads of notes.

It certainly was a race weekend to forget regarding the second hand embarrassment I felt but I enjoyed meeting Ben and seeing Mason again. An even better part of this race weekend was Lando getting his first victory of the season at his home Grand Prix with Lewis following in second and George in third. A full British podium.

After the post-race interviews finished, I rushed into my car and got into the drivers seat, before Jenson would steal it once again. The moment I shut my door, there was a knock on the window.

"Scoot over darling. I am in charge." Jenson eyes me and opens the driver's door.

"After how you behaved today? I don't think so sir." It ticks him so badly being called 'sir' so I believe it was very fitting at the moment.

"I hope you learn from your mistakes next time." He rolls his eyes and climbs into the car, at the passenger's seat next to me. Whenever Jenson says something like that, I tend to regret my actions. This time and especially with what has happened, I fear even more.

We decided to book a hotel closer to the circuit which thankfully means less driving for me now but more for when I have to drive back all the way to Manchester.

Silence is filling the room, with only soft music disrupting the peace. I don't really mind the quietness but clearly Jenson does and decides to take matters into his own hands.

As I am trying to focus on the road, Jenson's hand gets ahold on my thigh which is showing more than it should, caressing it softly on the inner part. I don't remove his hand, supposedly thinking it's innocent and nothing more.

The hand's movements become more fragile for my skin as his touch is sending shivers down my spine. His fingers are playing with the lace of my underwear, stretching them until you hear the cracks of the fabric.

"Jenson please" is all I manage to say as I am being caught off guard with fingers softly drawing circles around my wetness and lightly sliding them inside me.

"Please what, baby?" he coos inside my ear and I am unable to even phrase a proper word. He has a ridiculously big effect on me, something I hate myself for.

"G-give me, f-f-five min-nutes." I barely say as his fingers are being buried deeper with faster movements inside my pussy, causing it to throb and ache. Oh my god.

"Your time is over. It's time to play with my favourite toy." I gulp hardly and bite my lower lip, trying to hold the steering wheel as steady as possible. Jenson's free arm assist me with driving, something that surprises me, given he can make me finish and drive at the same time.

It doesn't take more than two minutes when I finally pull in front of the hotel and I feel Jenson's fingers free my pussy. I look at him with a fully flushed face and a smirk is being drawn on his lips. He will be the death of me.

"Take off your panties and give them to me. Pretend like everything is fine even though you feel the ache that my fingers have caused you." he commands and like the girl in love that I am, I oblige.

The wait until we finally reach the room is unbearable. I try to walk as shamelessly as possible, acting like nothing is going on underneath me. My panties are stuffed on Jenson's pocket, placed there very carefully as if he isn't in possession of anything.

Once the door unlocks, he shuts its loudly and pushes me against, his lips all over mine, kissing me as if we hadn't touched since forever. He is hungry. I know he loves me but the way he is acting now shows possessiveness and jealousy.

"You are mine and only mine sweetheart." He gasps for air before smashing onto my neck, sucking it violently, as his hands are busy trying to undo my bra. Once he finally manages to clip it off, his fingers toy with my hardened nipples and instantly earns a moan from me.

"I need you Jense." I breathe out and move my hands on his chest, undressing him from the polo that was blocking my favourite view. Jenson's body was built like he was a fucking god. He may be 43 but he looks better than any guy my age would.

"Jump" he commands once more and I wrap my legs around his waist. My body is thrown on top of the bed and with his firm arms, Jenson spreads my legs wide, revealing my throbbing and needy pussy, whilst he is unbuckling his pants, revealing an equally hardened erection.

He is standing in front of me, full blown naked and I feel like I have lost my senses. Goddamn he is stupidly handsome and I am glad to be under his mercy. I feel vulnerable under his sight and like he is about to feast, he climbs on top of me, scanning my body from head to toe.

"Oh my innocent baby. I will try to play nice, despite how much I want to fuck you raw." He growls and flicks his tongue over my pussy, causing me to groan loudly.

"Who said I wanted you to play nice?" I say in a low manner, with the neediness apparent in my voice.

[idiotwithanipad]

(I already did a version of these on paper ages ago but there wasn't a lot of space so here's the extended version😂)

Ten Questions With Amy

Alison: Ten questions with Amy

Alison: Where were you born?

Amy: A hospital

Alison: Yeah but where? Where was the hospital?

Amy: Oh. Some shitty ward in Farnborough Hospital, Kent

Alison: Alright, thanks. How did you die?

Amy: Choked to death on Mango Loco Monster. I can demolish a Monster... But- turns out the Monster demolished me (made a peace sign)

Alison: Right then... Favourite food?

Amy: ITALIAN! I LOVE Italian food. Lasagne, Spaghetti Carbonara, Bolognese, Pizza... Ugh, I'm hungry now, fuck sake...

Alison: Comfort food, can't beat it. Uh, favourite drink?

Amy: Monster. Ironically. Mango Loco and Aussie Lemonade are bangers. Bad Apple is pretty good too, but you gotta love the original

Alison: I could never wrap my mind around them to be honest, I think our friend Obi preferred them

Amy: Smart guy

Alison: Favourite song?

Amy: Too many to count. It's been years since I've used my phone. My headphones don't even work anymore, so- (shrugs)...Depends on the mood really. For nostalgia it's gotta be 'Buttercup' and 'Baby Hotline' by Jack Stauber. That was cute shit. 'Little Dark Age' by MGMT was pretty cool. But my one true love is Insane Clown Posse, now THAT'S me all over. Other than that, just anything you'd listen to during a late night car ride in the pissing down with rain really... Yeah

Alison: Right... Never heard of any of that-

Amy: What?..

Alison: Moving swiftly on... Favourite sport?

Amy: Not really a fan of sports... I hate people seeing my body, have done since I was little. Got called a stick insect one too many times and it pissed me off

Alison: That's fair. Bullies need to grow up and get a life

Amy: Or a coffin...

Alison: ... Yeah, that too. Biggest regret?

Amy: Alive or dead?- When I was alive, it'd have to be my death. I still wake up every morning and call myself a twat. Ghost regret, umm- that'd have to be when I left Humphrey on his own for the whole day. I felt like shit for a week after that

Alison: Really?

Amy: Yeah, why'd you sound shook?

Alison: It's just- nobody seemed to really worry about him before

Amy: (Looked visibly uncomfortable) ... Each to their own...

Alison: Okay.. Fondest memory?

Amy: Again, alive or dead? Alive would have to be weekends at my granddad's house, he was always so funny, always buzzing to do things. Or getting my first tattoo with my friend Shan. Ghost memory would be when Robin taught me how to skin a mammoth, guy couldn't stop smiling when I got all the steps right. Or when he introduced me to Silver, it was a relief not being the only 'modern' ghost... Pat and Julian don't count.

Alison: Why not?

Amy: Have you seen those two?...

Alison: ... Yeah, no, I get it now..

Amy: Or actually, high up there would be when Humphrey gave me a hug for the first time. He's quite a good hugger actually

Alison: Humphrey again? Seems like he's made an impression?

Amy: By not being a c**t, yeah

Alison: Okaaaay, Worst trait?

Amy: I tend to swear a lot, but I can't help it, it's just so fucking fun!

Alison: I had a feeling you'd say that.

Amy: And I used to smoke more than my fair share, you could probably make s'mores in my lungs, not gonna lie

Alison: At Nineteen?

Amy: Yeah. I started sneaking cigarettes when I was fifteen, and never stopped...

Alison: ... Wow...

Amy: You don't have any Mayfair Sky Blue on you, do you?

Alison: Jeez... Any words of wisdom?

Amy: I'm nineteen so no not really. I'd say keep to yourself and don't guzzle your drinks

Alison: Alright. Thanks.

Amy: Yeah. ... About that Mayfair-

Alison: I don't have any cigarettes, Amy!

[venturismcdonald]

Alright you, I am totally willing to chat with you about Derek Venturi's vibe being "folklore" by Taylor Swift. I'm gonna end up listening to that album again this weekend while thinking about him, my favourite blorbo, and internally screaming while I work retail; and I both blame AND thank thee.

Okay, yes, because here's the thing: folklore is an album full of contradictions and really fucking confusing plotlines and self doubt while simultaneously believing in oneself above all else and that is Derek Venturi to a t. (He's also Midnights but that's a conversation for another day.) Please add your thoughts to this somewhat comprehensible thing I wrote about this!

Literally ever since the thought came to me all I have been able to think is Derek being every song and I have ✨thoughts✨ on it.

the 1: alright, look, Derek is aware that people *think* he's cool. But the thing is, he's had two serious relationships in his entire life. Sally was cool, he thinks he loved her, in the fearless way someone loves when they're sixteen and might have had feelings for their stepsister at the same time. Being with Sally was cool, but he knew it never would've worked out long term because... *vaguely hand gestures to his brain, which must be at least 20% Casey.* It's not that Derek regrets being with and loving Sally, he's just aware it wasn't forever and was never meant to be. He always felt like he had to be better around her, to be a version of himself that didn't prank Casey and start wars with the football team (even though, hello, they're football players, Sally, they totally deserve it! Max is annoying and an ass and not a good partner to Casey and football is a terrible sport that only narcissistic egomaniacs who should be spouting the Star Spangled fucking Banner play), a version of himself that was soft and kind and just not Derek. He can be those things, but not all the time. His love language is fond insults.

cardigan: this one is how he feels a lot of the time. As a society, we've acknowledged this is a song about being used when someone needs something but not actually being what they need or want. That's how Derek feels. He's a god amongst men, alright, and that comes with people wanting him for something or another constantly. Do they care about him? Not really, but don't they do a damn good job of pretending? It's almost convincing. Just like the song.

the last great american dynasty: is he a woman named Rebekah living in Rhode Island after the death of her first husband? No, not to his knowledge. Does he fit the vibe of someone who decides that fuck it, he's going to spend the rest of his life doing a bunch of random hijinks with his friends and Casey and their pack of kids? Of course. That's literally Derek. He has dyed a dog key lime green (Casey didn't find it nearly as amusing as Derek and Molly did, because she is lame and needs to expand her horizons), he has decided to pace rocks just to look insane and aesthetic and he's certainly made questionable gambling decisions (hence Sky's conception. Use a condom, kids.)

exile: do you know how long this man spent pining after Casey?? If we take LWL into effect, it's twenty four years! And in those 24 years, Casey was never single longer than nine or ten months (because she's Casey and loves long term relationships and all the bullshit that comes with them because she's never done anything casually. Except the one time they fucked and he ran away to Paris and they never spoke of it again), which meant Derek had to watch her fall in love, over and over again, with different terrible men! Really, what was she thinking? A football captain, a douchebag who rated her (and only thought she was a six and a half, as if Derek would ever obsess over a six and a half! It's insulting), a guy who didn't have a personality and a neglectful husband have been her choices. He has to watch, from the sidelines, because she doesn't let him in after everything happened, after the fight and the sex and the avoidance. All he is to her is a stepbrother she once hooked up with. Nothing more. Meanwhile, his heart cracks every time he sees her and Peter on Facebook.

my tears ricochet: specifically the first verse is giving Derek vibes to me. He knows he can bring out every side of people effortlessly, he can read them like a book because Derek is so smart, it's just people smart! It's why he knows that he has to try and be the greatest (not that it takes much effort, but it's difficult some days) to get any attention, to get love from his parents and his family and everyone around him. Because everyone loves him conditionally and Derek is barely holding himself together. Scotch tape doesn't fix everything. But c'mon, Marti, Simon and Sky are the only people who have loved him without conditions, without terms of service. What else is he supposed to believe? That he's suddenly lovable and perfect and doesn't need to put in any effort ever because he's not a fuck up? That would erase literal decades of George, Abby and Nora's parenting.

seven: being a kid is fucking great, man. Even a kid whose parents don't like him, who make him feel like a fuck up because he had to repeat the first grade (look, alright, it's hard to focus and his brain won't because Derek is broken and he's aware. Moving on), a kid who tries so hard and never gets acknowledgement. And then his parents have Edwin! Just because! Edwin is planned, he's wanted, he's everything Derek isn't. But when Derek is seven, George and Nora start fighting more. He takes Ed (who's two) and they hide out in the backyard, in a shitty treehouse that'll probably result in a broken bone one day, playing pirates until Edwin falls asleep or the yelling stops, whichever comes first. Because being seven is also impossible. It's great in hindsight, but at the time? God, it sucks. He romanticizes it until he remembers having to scream so loud the neighbors thought something was wrong so George and Abby would stop fighting, remembers the time he broke his arm on the slide because they wouldn't get outside and play so he went first and they didn't even notice until three days later because they were in such an intense fight. Being seven was the best and worst of times and sometimes, Derek thinks it was his peak. In a weird competition, his parents would always try to shower him with love right after a fight. It didn't add up, but whatever, who is he to judge?

august: Derek is August. I need this to be known; he's the one waiting on a call, who desperately wants to get it and knows he won't. Casey won't call, she'll never call, because they fucked everything up, hooking up. He saw it clear as day on her face the morning after, it's why he went to fucking Paris. And honestly, he's never really a first choice, is he? He's always the backup guy, the guy who you drag out for looks but don't actually love. You'll pretend to, and you'll do a good job, but no one actually does and that's okay.

this is me trying: he tries, alright? It may not seem like it, with Derek being a solid D+ student, but he tries. So hard. It's not his fault that his fucking brain won't cooperate and he can't learn the useless stuff. Give him a hockey stick, he'll be so good you'll forget all about your problems, but don't make him do school. He hates it. The only topics he can learn about are the ones he's obsessed with (mythology, film, music, the history of video games that one summer, the bodice rippers Casey keeps under her pillow, Casey as a whole entity (this is entirely against his will. Believe him, his life would be so much easier if he didn't know so much about Casey and feel so much about her he cannot breathe and he can't talk about it so it just sits there, being a crushing weight on him because she is inconvenient! And annoying and the absolute worst!), hockey, all of Marti and Simon's interests, etc) and five paragraph essays do not fit that. But then there's the fact he practically is a parent to Marti, doing all the emotional and physical labor of one most of the time. He tries so hard to not fuck her up because he loves her so much. Ed's cool and he loves him, but Smarti's different, okay? When Derek met Edwin, he sort of just shrugged, loved the kid and failed to get him into anything cool. When he met Marti, Abby told him he'd be taking on responsibility and Derek took that seriously. He's uncharacteristically responsible with her. Marti is the fucking best. Derek tries so hard to not be obsessed with Casey, even though it feels like she's in his fucking bloodstream, she's running through him, she's a goddamn part of him and sometimes he wants to crawl inside of her skin and live there, because he knows she can't feel the same. Casey doesn't love him. Casey doesn't even like him! So he pranks her and grins and throws a fit when she dates Sam (which, seriously Sam? What a fucking betrayal, dude. The male code! It's a real thing and definitely not something he just pulled out of his ass so you wouldn't date his annoying and hot stepsister) and eventually tries to be a decent person because, for some reason, she doesn't give up on him. It's sickening.

illicit affairs: before Casey finalized her divorce with Peter, there was (shh, it's a secret, don't tell the family) an affair happening in her house. Take two guesses as to who it was. Derek and Casey? Brilliant. Yeah, it's an affair, and it makes Derek feel dirty, like all he's good for is being a secret boy toy, but he loves her so much that he'll take whatever she's giving, even if it's just bare scraps. Derek will break himself in half to help her, to make Casey feel better, and if being her mistress is how he does it, then it'll be fine. He won't panic about their future once her divorce is finalized at all.

invisible string: there is only one explanation for why Derek's felt so drawn to Casey since he first met her. She had a schoolgirl uniform on. Is it his kink? No, not particularly, but she's a hot girl in a schoolgirl uniform. He's not blind! But also, he met her and something in his brain lit up, some part he'd never known was there before, some part that made him want to be around her all of the time for some inexplicable reason. She's infected him like a cancer. It's evil. He loves it. There's something dragging them together constantly, and at his age of 38 (please don't mention it, he's coping poorly), he can admit it might be fate or the universe or whatever. Derek loves Casey and she loves him back. Has for decades, apparently. They should've pulled their heads out of their asses so much sooner, because they're in love and it's great and they go do all the cute coupley shit Derek used to swear he'd never do but in his defense: it's Casey and she lights up doing that bullshit and Derek is a total marshmallow when it comes to her. She even gets to steal his food! And watch her terrible reality shows during hockey games! This whole love thing has turned him into a disgusting sap of a person. Shoot him, please. He begs.

mad woman: Derek's spent enough time around women (Casey especially) to understand they are complex creatures. He'll never fully understand them, but he can try to. They get mad at... A lot, honestly, being a woman must be exhausting (Casey and Marti are constantly feeling things so deeply it's painful) and sometimes it's each other? He's not quite sure, but he knows they're mad. And when they are, do not mess with them. Even Casey, who is stupid hot when mad. The world is against women, apparently, so they get mad at that and the fact they have to pay for tampons (Derek ends up buying them, do not make it a thing) and having it be inferred they're just fucking insane. Which, to be fair, they are! Casey especially! But yeah, it's gotta be annoying, so he's trying to empathize and be feminist and other bullshit that Skyler has bullied him into.

epiphany: so here's the problem: Derek is aware he's had a pretty decent life, all things considered. No massive traumas, nothing a therapist should see him for. Still, he can't help but feel sometimes like there's a war being waged between his brain and the Canadian education system. It's fucking insane! School just doesn't work and Derek is broken because he doesn't get it, he doesn't understand, everything feels violent and he can't cope. Hence hockey, where he can hit things and people with sticks! Hockey is great! It's bloody and gorey and everything else Casey hates.

betty: oh boy. This one's a doozy. But it's not Derek's fault, he will maintain, that he accidentally pissed Casey off so much she won't talk to him. He made one joke about her divorce (which wasn't even that bad! The kids laughed! Simon laughed! Casey is the only one who didn't) and now she's stormed off and won't talk to him so obviously Derek needs to apologize. He hates apologies; they're lame and suck all the fun out of everything and they are the worst! But he does, and god, does he hope that it'll be enough for him to apologize by playing her a song he wrote and talking about his (ugh) feelings for her to kiss him in front of the kids and their parents and admit this is what she wants. Because this thing between them has always been on her terms, he's just along for the ride, but he'd really like to be with her forever.

peace: one of the few cons of being as amazing as Derek is that he doesn't get any privacy half the time. Neither do his romantic partners, as a result. He's aware of this and it's part of why he doesn't date anymore; it's too hard to find someone willing to deal with all of it. Once he and Casey officially get together, one of Derek's biggest fears is that she's going to realize he's not worth it. Because she'll never have a quiet, peaceful life that Casey deserves, not being with him. Everything will be an article and it's going to suck and Derek loves her. Will she be okay without getting that peace? He'd get it if she wasn't; it's okay, he won't hold it against her. She'll never get to live a normal life with him. When she tells him she'd rather insane with anyone else than normal with him, he may or may not shed a tear or two. Because he's not worth that, he isn't even close to worth the chaos that'll come with it, but Casey thinks he is for some reason, so Derek will keep trying to prove to her that he is. Every day for the rest of his goddamn life.

hoax: when love feels conditional and faithless, it's essentially a massive hoax. Derek doesn't believe in a love that'll exist with unwavering loyalty and faith and trust. It's not for him. Maybe for other people, but he doesn't get that. Everyone's love for him is a fake, a pretend, and Derek is great at pretending he doesn't know it. Love is bullshit, the kind they talk about in the movies. That doesn't exist for people like Derek. It exists for Marti and Casey and Edwin and Lizzie and Nora and George and hell, Abby and Dennis, but not for Derek. He's not wired to receive it. And he'll believe they all love him endlessly to go to sleep at night, waking up knowing it's a lie.

the lakes: sometimes, a man wants peace and quiet. He wants to go to an abandoned lake, write songs with his girlfriend, let the kids play and do whatever the fuck Luca and Sky do (he thinks Luca has a boyfriend?? It's confusing. He FaceTimes him a lot) and avoid people forever. And then Derek remembers how much he hates camping because urban hell scapes are his favorite thing, shrugs, and proceeds to overromanticize small New England towns until he goes to one. Let him have his fun, he's an artist. This is his muse.

[drbtinglecannon]

Hello, friend!!! I hope you have been well, and your cats too 💖

Nowz for the TOH ask game... 2, 8, 16? 👀

Thank you, pal, you're so sweet and I hope you've been doing well too! 💖✨

2. Favorite episode of season 2?

Tbh S2 fucks so hard I'm not sure I can pick a favorite. I have to cheat by picking one for both the first half and second half of the season haha!

S2A might have to go to Knock Knock Knockin' on Hooty's Door, the amount of speed running plot development all thanks to Hooty my favorite weirdo, it was just insane. I remember when the episode first aired and how much it made my brain boil from what it revealed about Eda's backstory and the growth of accepting the beast resulting in her hot harpy form, the bits of world building with King's situation that continued on from what Echoes of the Past started, and obviously Lumity became canon. I genuinely expected it to take the entire show for them to start dating but no they got together about half way into the show, all thanks to Hooty meddling in everyone's business. Hooty was always one of my favs and the way he was treated in S1 always bummed me out, so this episode both addressing how excluded he felt while also having him (kinda accidentally) provide the much needed pushes for each of King, Eda, and Luz was just 🤌 the ending too omg the way everyone freaked out about him eating that letter then womp womp it ended up being a good thing he did haha

S2B I have to pick Any Sport In A Storm.

Listen. Listen. This episode is such a comfort, ok? It's got Hunter development where he finally gets to socialize (in a healthy way) with other kids, Willow gets her design update AND she's finally genuinely developing confidence in herself, "what was that?" "I SAID IT WAS COOL >:(", Skara and Viney join the group (which also allowed Skara to develop past just being a popular mean girl), "ice pack for Steve" "Steve is beginning to regret his choices", and of course, Darius. Darius my beloved, the small backstory reveal with the previous GG, "Little Prince (derogatory)" he really does canon use cute nicknames to be hostile, the abomination PJs & also the bubble bath storyboards, the DEPTH of what it meant for Darius to intervene in Hunter's kidnapping attempt so now all the responsibility falls onto him when HE DIDN'T NEED TO DO THAT HE DIDN'T EVEN LIKE HUNTER AND IT PUT HIM IN RISK INTERVENING, "I can wear this proudly now...right?" "Can you?", his extra abomination lounge chair while he gingerly kept messing with the EE, "You're gonna need to be a little more clever than that" *12 seconds later the ship crashed and is on fire all because he was too much of a difficult bitch to Tell These Actual Children he wasn't really kidnapping them*, "Do you have any idea what I'm capable of?!", "I'm impressed! I had you all wrong!", the first head pat, the scroll, " But you could still use a sewing lesson." Like. I still can't believe the pay off of that moment. I immediately fell in love with the dynamic between Hunter & Darius at the end of that episode and for the rest of the show they were never able to connect on screen again it was always a "just missed each other" thing, until FINALLY in the finale Darius ruffles Hunter's hair and then asks him about his dumb wolf shirt and 4yrs later he's Hunter's dad. I was fighting for my life for Dadrius since HM (I was more Uncle Darius after ASIAS until HM) and it PAID OFF LIKE!!!! 😭🤌

Anyway can't forget to praise the Huntlow there too, with the parallel to Willow's parents the gold rimmed glasses the "half a witch" parallels and of course, Hunter's first blush towards Willow on the bi flag colored sky. The Lumity subplot was also really funny, especially in hindsight considering Boscha's issues in FTF haha. A 10/10 episode overall

8. Favorite other character?

Ok so since this one explicitly excludes hexsquad, hagsquad, and palisman, I think I have to choose Hooty. Hooty was one of my favorite characters back in S2A, he's so hilarious and I love his relationship with Lilith so so much, they're so much like Darius & Eber to me haha!

16. Favorite Raeda moment (if you ship it)?

OK SO my pal Lolly really articulated this scene from KT perfectly here

BUT I also have to talk about the fight against Darius & Eber in Eda's Requiem because that scene of them back to back playing Their Song while Eda's curse mutated the magic around them and was going to KILL THEM rewrote my brain chemistry. LOOK AT THIS. LOOK AT THEM.

Just the palpable longing of them both looking over their shoulders at each other as they played. The animation, the music, the symbolism of it being Their Song, the shared history, the way they were willing to die together for the cause of fighting Belos and the subsequent hindsight reveal of how Fucking Stupid it would've been if they did --between King taking Eda's last name & officially becoming her son, Darius & Eber were also rebels trying to save Raine, ultimately all 3 of Raine Darius & Eber would've just been replaced in time for the DOU, like on every single level this plan was STUPID but the longing gay angst these two have for each other almost made them do it anyway.

Raine's voice cracking at the "You have kids?!" was as funny as it was heartbreaking, because it was just another reminder of how much of their lives they've been apart and how Eda finally let others in but Raine wasn't there for it nor was she ever able to do so for them before. Eda's sputtering about "Well they're not mine mine" like she WANTS THEM TO BE but she can't admit it and is still being closed off and Raine quoting Eda in reference to the scene they already quoted earlier in the episode, all cultivating in Raine letting go of Eda's hand -- like they let go of their relationship years ago -- all to save her ;___; idk pal this episode fucked me up so much when it aired and my partner still teases me when I rewatch it like "you're watching the gay episode again huh"

Anyway yeah. I have a lot of love for this show haha

[ticiie]

week 6: when the doubts creep in

prompt from the off-season winter sport fandom challenge

length: 1508 words

pairing: Gino Caviezel/Marco Odermatt

author's note: trying to make up for missing last week by adding the hint of a road trip but at the same time bending and breaking this weeks prompt again because writing is really hard on me atm

Justin didn't bother getting out of the car and to ring at Marco's door, he just honked three times, loud enough to wake up the entire neighborhood. Marco came hurrying out and down the last couple of stairs before either Justin or Thomas could get out of the car.

“You're late!,” he greeted them.

“And you're early, we're usually the ones left waiting.” Justin took Marco's bag and stowed with the rest of the luggage in the back of his car. After the suit bag was placed securely on the top, Marco and Justin hugged briefly. They hadn't seen each other in quite some time, Marco had been too tied up with work and hadn't found a chance to make it to Mauro's bachelor party so now the excitement for the actual wedding was even bigger. Marco climbed in the backseat.

Thomas acclaimed him with a “took you way too long” and Marco scoffed but gave him an affectionate pat to the shoulder. Justin went flat out and they shot down Marco's street, through the village and back on the highway within the least amount of time possible.

“As much as I'm concerned about us being late, I do fancy arriving at the venue in one piece so would you please not kill us?” Thomas asked. He had his hand clenched around the handle above his head.

“We're late,” Justin said, not even pretending to slow down. Oh, how much he'd missed them, Marco thought and laughed to himself. They told him all the fun stories about the party, most of them involving a drunk Justin and for some reasons Marco didn't quite catch, a pineapple-incident. He made a mental note to ask Gino about it later today. As for now, Marco was just very glad to be back around his teammates. The past weeks had been unusually busy, probably thanks to his very successful season. Everyone and their grandparents had wanted something from Marco and Zoé had done the most amazing job with coordinating the association's meetings around his private appointments.

“So, are you gonna do it?,” Justin eventually asked. He looked at Marco through the rearview mirror. Marco hesitated for a second, which was one way to answer.

“No,” he then added with a sigh. Thomas turned around in disbelieve. “You're breaking up with him?”

“Of course not, are you out of your mind?! I just don't want to pull all the attention on us. It's Mauro's wedding, it's really not my place to spoil it for either of them.”

“Yeah, Justin's gonna do that all by himself if he gets himself drunk again.” Thomas' comment earned him a punch from Justin.

The rest of the drive went by rather eventless. The serpentine streets guided them upwards, in and out of the forest, to the top where the view suddenly extended again and the clear blue sky welcomed them. It was all thanks to Justin’s insanity they made it in time, with the last guests still standing outside the chapel, about to get seated, when he basically threw the car to the side of the street and they all jumped out.

“Thank goodness,” Gino breathed as he spotted his friends. He was standing next to the entry so he could give a sign to the head of the band when it was time to start the music. Many people came so it took Justin and Thomas a bit longer than necessary to squeeze past friends and family members, earning one or two stern looks but the smiles and whispered “hello, great to see you” prevailed. Meanwhile Marco had allowed himself an extra minute to kiss Gino quickly. The older one had forgotten all about his anger and frustration and felt himself relaxing against Marco’s touch.

“You look amazing,” he said and Marco felt his heart stumble in his chest and his cheeks turning red. Even after so many years, it had never needed more effort from Gino than that to make Marco flush, a fact that probably wouldn’t be changing anytime soon.

Gino went to take his position next to Mauro just as the music began. Nina, Mauro’s soon-to-be wife, entered the chapel, looking as beautiful as never before. Mauro clutched his chest. It was hard to decide whether he should laugh or cry out of pure luck. Marco met Gino’s eyes and they both shared an equally affectionate smile. Had it been the right decision to leave the velvet box at home? Gino was the love of his life, no doubts creeping in there. But what if this was the last chance Marco got? The longer he waited, the more Gino might start to hesitate? It was Thomas who helped Marco out of the down pull of his spiraling thoughts. He leaned over and whispered: “You can still ask him, even without the ring.” At first, Marco didn’t react. He kept watching the ceremony. Mauro was taking his vows, stating how much he loved Nina, not just for who she was but also what she had done to him. There was more than one person in the audience who was reaching for their tissues. Marco refused to look up from his shoelaces. The days Mauro was referring to had been long and insufferable. The fact that Mauro had overcome this hell on earth with more positives than he had entered it with was a miracle. For a moment, the only thing audible was the rustling of hankies and people sniffling here and there. Then the first notes of a well-known Swiss pop song chimed up and by that time, even the people who hadn’t lost it completely yet, did so now.

The wedding and the reception were followed by a delicious open-air dinner on the Caviezel-estate. A couple of gazebos had been drawn up on the lawn, all surrounding a hardwood dance floor that was encircled by lanterns and flower décor, giving the whole setting a wonderful relaxed vibe. The band was playing danceable songs, those not dancing enjoyed a good talk along with a fine glass of wine. To wrap it up: it was a perfect night for the perfect wedding. Mauro and Nina were the center of attention on the dance floor. She had taken off her high heels a while ago already and now she was swinging in Mauro’s arms, with her head against his chest. It was obvious to everyone and their grandmother that those two had found their missing piece.

The guys were sitting at their table when Gino joined them. His day had been a lot busier than he had expected and so this was probably the first time he got to sit down properly. Underneath the exhaustion, he was happy though. He smiled at Marco as he poured him a glass of water and accepted it along with the soft kiss Marco placed on his cheek.

“Hey Justin, let’s go check out the photobooth,” Thomas quickly said and got up. Justin protested. “What? No, I only just sat down again, have you even tried the cake, it’s really good!” He stretched out his plate under Thomas’ nose who just motioned in Gino’s and Marco’s direction to make him understand the hint. “Yeah, the photobooth looks fun indeed,” he grumbled, leaving his second serving of dessert behind with a sad look. Neither Gino nor Marco had taken much notice of the conversation.

“I love Mauro but I’m seriously not sad about this day being over.,” Gino eventually sighed.

“Does that mean you don’t want a big party then once you get married?”

“Certainly not as big as this one. I don’t need a hundred guests in our front lawn.” Hearing Gino talk about their front lawn as if it was obvious enough they had already agreed on getting married was the last bit of certainty it took for Marco to do it. “Here goes nothing then,” he whispered and got up from his chair and down on one knee. He took Gino’s hand.

“I love you, Gino. I really do and although I can’t say a lot more about how much I love you without tearing up again, I want you to know that I don’t want to spend my life without you by my side anymore. So, I’m asking you: Will you do me the honor and marry me?”

This time, it was Gino who couldn’t decide between laughing and crying. The big lump in his throat prevented him from speaking so he just pulled out a little box from his pocket and presented its containments to Marco: A simple yet gorgeous ring. Marco just stared at it, giving Gino the chance to find his speech again. “I wasn’t sure if you’d ever ask. Yes, yes of course I want to marry you.” Gino pulled Marco to kiss him, both their faces covered in tears but the joy radiating off their bodies for everyone to see. They didn’t hear the people cheering and applauding, especially Gino’s brother and his sister-in-law. The most perfect end to a perfect day.

[saritawolff]

More tags, adding on more length to this post (I hope this doesn’t become the new “do you love the color of the sky”)

You may be thinking of minks, which are another type of mustelid related to ferrets. Minks are bred in fur farms and fur farm minks are larger and softer than wild minks. Since they’re bred in human care, they do tend to be much tamer than a wild mink would be, however, they are not truly domesticated. They’re bred for size, color, softness, and ease of care in a fur farm setting, not for ease of care in a person’s house. Still, some people keep them as exotic pets. As they are semi-aquatic, they require access to water deep enough to submerge in at all times, a varied diet, and a rigorous enrichment program. These are things that can not be provided by a single household. I agree with your friend, if they were in fact talking about minks! If not though, ferrets are good alternative pets to keep but definitely require a specific type of person able to keep up with their enrichment needs and diet, as you’re probably not going to be using them to hunt rabbits.

No, it can take hundreds of generations for an animal population to have evolved enough to be considered domesticated. What you are thinking of is habituation. Habituation involves training an animal (whether intentionally or not) to lose its fear of humans. This is incredibly dangerous for the animal. Some habituated animals end up in zoos, but most end up needing to be euthanized for both the animals’ safety and human safety. It also leads to the spread of zoonotic diseases such as rabies and toxoplasmosis. I really hope you’re joking about luring foxes into your home.

Siberia is in Asia, and from what I read while researching for this, most can agree that dog domestication happened somewhere around there. I’m sure it would have been more Northern, as that’s where Pleistocene Wolves would have been ranging.

I don’t think we can truly ever get an exact area though. All the other animals on this list were domesticated during or after the advent of civilization. Dogs were domesticated when humans were still migratory hunter-gatherers, which is just wild to me.

There is actually a type of sheep called the European Mouflon, which were descended from feral sheep (similar to how wild hogs are descended from feral pigs). I worked with some at one point and they are insane. I can not imagine how the first round-up of truly wild Armenian Mouflon went.

Thank you for pointing this out it’s literally my favorite scientific name

I would be up for it as long as any educators contact me first, after which I can send them the high-res images. I don’t like my stuff being used without permission. I’d also want some time to correct issues I’m already noticing (I forgot to add blood sport for chickens and also the afformentioned misleading way I seemed to include spider ball pythons as a breed rather than an example of unethical breeding).

Phew. This one took, uh… a bit longer than expected due to other projects both irl and art-wise, but it’s finally here. The long-awaited domestic animal infographic! Unfortunately, I didn’t have enough space to cover every single domestic animal (I’m so sorry, reindeer and koi, my beloveds) but I tried to include as many of the “major ones” as possible.

I made this chart in response to a lot of the misunderstandings I hear concerning domestic animals, so I hope it’s helpful!

Further information I didn’t have any room to add or expand on:

🐈 “Breed” and “species” are not synonyms! Breeds are specific to domesticated animals. A Bengal Tiger is a species of tiger. A Siamese is a breed of domestic cat.

🐀 Different colors are also not what makes a breed. A breed is determined by having genetics that are unique to that breed. So a “bluenose pitbull” is not a different breed from a “rednose pitbull”, but an American Pitbull Terrier is a different breed from an American Bully! Animals that have been domesticated for longer tend to have more seperate breeds as these differing genetics have had time to develop.

🐕 It takes hundreds of generations for an animal to become domesticated. While the “domesticated fox experiment” had interesting results, there were not enough generations involved for the foxes to become truly domesticated and their differences from wild foxes were more due to epigenetics (heritable traits that do not change the DNA sequence but rather activate or deactivate parts of it; owed to the specific circumstances of its parents’ behavior and environment.)

🐎 Wild animals that are raised in human care are not domesticated, but they can be considered “tamed.” This means that they still have all their wild instincts, but are less inclined to attack or be frightened of humans. A wild animal that lives in the wild but near human settlements and is less afraid of humans is considered “habituated.” Tamed and habituated animals are not any less dangerous than wild animals, and should still be treated with the same respect. Foxes, otters, raccoons, servals, caracals, bush babies, opossums, owls, monkeys, alligators, and other wild animals can be tamed or habituated, but they have not undergone hundreds of generations of domestication, so they are not domesticated animals.

🐄 Also, as seen above, these animals have all been domesticated for a reason, be it food, transport, pest control, or otherwise, at a time when less practical options existed. There is no benefit to domesticating other species in the modern day, so if you’ve got a hankering for keeping a wild animal as a pet, instead try to find the domestic equivalent of that wild animal! There are several dog breeds that look and behave like wolves or foxes, pigeons and chickens can make great pet birds and have hundreds of colorful fancy breeds, rats can be just as intelligent and social as a small monkey (and less expensive and dangerous to boot,) and ferrets are pretty darn close to minks and otters! There’s no need to keep a wolf in a house when our ancestors have already spent 20,000+ years to make them house-compatible.

🐖 This was stated in the infographic, but I feel like I must again reiterate that domestic animals do not belong in the wild, and often become invasive when feral. Their genetics have been specifically altered in such a way that they depend on humans for optimal health. We are their habitat. This is why you only really see feral pigeons in cities, and feral cats around settlements. They are specifically adapted to live with humans, so they stay even when unwanted. However, this does not mean they should live in a way that doesn’t put their health and comfort as a top priority! If we are their world, it is our duty to make it as good as possible. Please research any pet you get before bringing them home!

[spooky-cryptid-friend]

Can't stop thinking about Rowan

And I wanna know bout Ness now

(I tried to draw him but it was bad and I will try again but idk when I'll have the time and motivation at the same time)

OMG YOU PICKED THE NARRATIVE FOILS THIS WILL BE FUN

heres the post i used

He has straight black hair and many piercings; all gold. His eyes are yellow and glow like lanterns, and his teeth are sharp. Ness' most noticable feature, however, is his tail, which is long and looks vaguely like a whale's if it were more teal and had a rough texture.

Comic relief, he's always making jokes and trying to lighten the mood.

Doesn't believe but says phrases about God casually ("oh my god" "goddamn" "thank god" etc.); he doesn't carry any resentment towards God though. It's just a neutral thing to him, and whether He exists or not doesn't really bother him

He cries. Just curls up into a ball and sobs until someone notices. Somehow still manages to make a joke or two, but when he gets sick its really bad.

Gold looks GREAT on hima actually (he's semi aquatic and wears gold jewelery so it wont rust in the water. he doesnt like gold very much but gets defensive easily)

... so the creature the king fused him with may or may not have been a Loch Ness Monster. I think you can tell where the name came from.

Fries. If you have fries, he will steal some. If someone offers him fries he will stare at them like they hung the moon in the sky.

A small, poorly done tattoo of a fish behind his ear. He doesn't remember who did it, but he feels very nostalgic when he looks at it. He wishes he knew who did it, they must have been close.

Prefers colder climates, but if the humidity gets too low he SUFFERS. in the heat he's either miserable or in a body of water

Woah! Guess who can't write for the life of them! (its me. the only dialouge i have is from 2 years ago when i was a horrible writer)

Very jokey, sometimes seen as annoying but usually he's in a positive light. Some people mourn what could have been, but it doesn't show. If it does, Ness never did have good people reading skills

So cluttered its insane. He knows where everything is though

Ignores it! He can laugh it off, right! If it's more extreme (emotional) though, he will fully break down and spiral. He can swing from irritable to sobbing to yelling to just staring into space. He really has it all!

He's ok with relying on people for small things, but not big ones. Ness can ask someone to go get a pen for him, but will never ask for help moving a mountain

Takes up a lot of space. His tail is fairly big, so it usually sticks out behind him a lot, and he fidgets a lot with his hands

STR: 15 DEX: 10 CON: 13 INT: 8 WIS: 12 CHR: 16

1. Dying. He feels betrayed, even though he knew this was going to happen. He wishes he went out with a bang. Somehow, going quietly only makes him want to scream. 2. Waking up. He walked away from something to go somewhere. He couldn't remember that something, or the somewhere he was headed, but that was okay. He got a new mantra that day. "Everything's gonna be fine," 3. Realizing. It didn't matter that he agreed before, because everything's different now. Why did he agree? He couldn't remember. Nothing was fine. He died, and left the rest behind, and it was all his fault.

Red sports car, or beat up honda civic. no inbetween

He protects them. Kills spiders for them, reaches things on the tall shelves, would kill someone for them if they asked. He took the whole "guard dog" thing to heart

He wears a lot of band shirts, usually with jeans and some friendship bracelets. He's only ever taken one off.

Thank's for asking again! Here's my Ness playlist, it's pretty short but I like it.

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1eZw0H7vKCaE4QW9jGiUX4

(the song that reminds me the most of him is Phantasies)