#this was getting too long i had to cut it half way
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alchemistc · 2 days ago
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Tommy ignores the knock at his door. He's in day three pajamas and the only person who might make the effort to check in on him is his exes best friend. Which.
The knocking continues.
It's getting louder.
There's a Kings game on in the background and he's been elbow deep in the Jeep manual he'd finally cracked open in some sort of weird, fucked up pattern of mourning.
Tommy's never gonna buy a fucking Jeep. He hates them. You own one for more than five years and more than half the parts are replacement parts.
He's been staring at a diagram of the timing belt for half an hour, at least. The last thing he remembers about the game is Kuemper letting in three goals on five shots and somehow the Kings are up two, now, and there's still 25 minutes of game time left.
Tommy reaches for the remote. Turns the volume up.
The knocking returns less than a minute later.
---
There's a box of odds and ends tucked under the table in his entryway. He avoids looking at it. He knows there are a few things missing from it and he really doesn't want to examine what he'll have to do to avoid giving it to Eddie tonight. He cut the cords, he shouldn't be lingering watching the frayed edges sway in the wind, clutching his line like there's anything braced on the other side of it.
Evan's oldest, softest LAFD hoodie, the one that's technically too small for both of them but has stretched shockingly evenly and is definitely not sitting unwashed at the bottom of Tommy's laundry basket. The program from a recital of Denny's they'd stopped by to support him for, on their way out of town for a long weekend. Evan's stupid keto bread and the milk frother he'd left behind three months ago and never bothered to grab because he had more than one.
Whoever is at his door is still fucking knocking, and suddenly Tommy doesn't feel like being polite. He'll shove the box in Eddie's arms and tell him to fuck off and close the last few remaining open doors he has to this.
Only when he swings the door wide it's not Eddie on the other side, and the box nearly takes out whatever Evan - Buck, Jesus Christ - has in his own arms.
Not a Tommy box - too small for all the shit that he'd left behind. He misses the house slippers that had had a permanent spot tucked under the left side of the bed.
Tommy flinches, reels away, tries to shove the box away before Buck can see its contents.
"What are you doing here?" Even tone. No quiver in his voice. He's been called rude and dismissive for less.
Buck scowls. Hefts the rectangular dish in his hands and shoves past Tommy before Tommy can blink.
It's silly to say he chases after him, down the hallway towards the kitchen, but he's not exactly following along behind at a casual leisurely pace.
The glass pan slams down on his kitchen counter and Buck spends a minute staring at the calendar he was only getting two months out of because he couldn't look at the one with all Buck's notes penned in anymore.
"Wow," Buck says, and shifts his weight awkwardly.
"What are you -?"
"Jee and I made you birthday cupcakes," Buck says. His voice is hard. Angry. Hurt. "Happy birthday, asshole."
---
He cracks the lid and there are only three cupcakes inside. Tommy forgets himself. Raises a brow, amusement rolling over him pleasantly, prepared to tease him, but then he catches the set of Buck's legs and the curl of his mouth and the tight way his arm tucks itself back in against his belly, a protective gesture that reminds Tommy very effectively what this is.
"Why?" Tommy wonders aloud, and Evan's scowl deepens.
Buck's scowl.
God.
"We've been planning it for weeks." Something flashes across his eyes before he schools his features. "Jee made me promise to bring you some."
"She must not be a skilled baker," Tommy jokes. "If these are the only ones that made it."
Evan's expression twists. "I ate most of them."
The frosting looks fresh. No creases in the paper cup holding them together.
"I had to make a new batch of frosting because I used some of it for -." He cuts himself off. Looks like he'd like to throw it in Tommy's face but can't quite force himself to hurt Tommy.
It hurts as much as he'd expected, anyway.
The world is a small place. It's not the first time he's had to speak to an ex when he didn't want to. It's never pleasant.
This is worse. The cut and run is supposed to give him time.
Evan Buckley has been an ache behind his ribcage for months, now, long before he'd made that final decision. He'd known it was too little too late. Buck's gonna be the shadow other men see behind his eyes for years.
Buck's apparently found and slept with someone within the week and a half span from Tommy walking out to his sad shitty mopey birthday.
That he'd forgotten about.
Tommy leans in. Picks up a cupcake. Licks a stripe through the frosting and makes a face when he realizes it's buttercream.
"The ones you were supposed to get had the whipped cream one you like," Buck says, accusingly.
That somehow stings just a little bit extra.
Tommy pulls back the paper, takes a bite. There's raspberry filling inside, and Tommy can feel tears prickling at the edges of his eyes, because when he'd told Evan about how his grandma baked he'd been thinking of Evan being a grandparent, the kind of shit he'd forbidden himself from imagining with anyone he was dating years ago.
"Thank you," he manages, and Buck frowns.
"He thought the whipped cream was too sweet." And Tommy probably deserves this but he's not particularly in the mood.
"Cut it out, Buck."
Buck rolls his jaw. "I just figured you'd wanna know how it's going. Maybe I could tally up the hookups for you, count them all up by gender and stamina and opinions on how I should feel and act and fall for someone. Find out if I'm actually gay enough to be a man's last."
---
The rest of the cupcake kind of collapses and oozes as Tommy smacks it down on the counter. He takes thirty seconds to pull the other two cupcakes out before he's grabbing the too-large fake Pyrex and turning heel. The keto bread goes in the pan. Then the milk frother.
Tommy yanks the recital program off the fridge and tosses it in the trash.
Buck almost looks triumphant.
"The box under the side table has the rest. You can see yourself out."
He actually does exactly as he's told, and Tommy listens to his footsteps drift off, shoulders hunched in and the breath tight in his throat. He'd been cruel, it was only fair Buck got a few final kicks in.
Tommy sucks in a breath and blinks away the moisture at the edges of his vision.
The footsteps take a heel turn at the side table and turn right back around.
"This isn't everything."
Tommy half expects some panned comment about how Tommy's got his heart - the kind of silly shit he'd say to a dead outlaw.
"My sweatshirt," Buck says, and Tommy freezes.
He could lie. He could pretend he had no idea where it was. Claim he didn't remember it even being here, because that particular piece of clothing did have a tendency to travel.
He doesn't fucking want to hand that one over.
Buck smirks, like he's caught the crack, and is looking for ways to exploit it.
"I own my own house!" Tommy says, and it's a terrible launching point but Buck latches on.
"You just left, Tommy! I know I jumped the gun, Tommy, but you didn't even - you just left! I'm sorry, okay. I'm sorry I didn't know I was into men until you. I'm sorry you had to be my first, I'm sure that must have been such a burden for you."
"That's not fair."
"You didn't even give me a chance. That was - I'm so angry with you, Tommy. I'm so fucking mad."
"I know."
"But that's what you planned for, right? That's - you ripped the bandaid, Tommy, except there's a whole fucking untreated stab wound right underneath and it's still bleeding, Tommy."
"Did you even make this round of cupcakes with your niece?" It's better to keep his family's names out of his mouth. Just keep those ties cut.
Buck looks livid. "No, you idiot, I whipped up a tiny batch of this recipe just for the excuse to see you and - and tell you what a stupid, awful coward you are."
"That's not f-." He isn't sure whether Buck is being facetious about the small batch thing or not. He doesn't have any time to think about it.
"My sister and Chim are having another baby. Bobby and Athena are probably gonna host Christmas this year. Eddie shaved off the mustache and he's, like, dancing now, I guess. Hen and Karen are good for the first time in -." He shakes his head. Stares at Tommy. Tommy can't quite hide from that gaze. "We were good, Tommy. We were - you loved me."
He'd never said the words. Neither had Evan, but they'd both known. Both felt it. Tommy let it go too far, did it scared for longer than he usually would.
"It's not like that just went away when I walked out, Evan," Tommy hisses, and then regrets it immediately.
Evan has spent most of this visit pushing, pressing, digging fingers into the wound to make it hurt.
Evan goes silent now, reeling back a little. He seems shocked that Tommy had admitted it.
"I want you to go," Tommy says. "I need you to go, Buck."
It was the right dagger the first time, but apparently it's only effective once.
"I love you too, you know." His voice is soft. Tommy can't meet his eye. "And I hate you. I hate you even though I know that's what you wanted but I love you too much to not hate you out of spite."
Tommy knows if he caves it's done. He's signing himself over to whatever fucked thing will end them a week, a month, five years, two decades from now.
"Go home, Buck. Hate me there."
---
He goes in for the kill.
"I called Abby, two nights ago."
Right for the jugular. No survivors.
"She laughed for like twenty minutes, and then she tried to get me to chat about our sex life for comparison, and then she was shocked silent for a full minute when I wouldn't." Because Evan had always been a little too open about those details. "She also told me she forgave you but she doesn't think you ever forgave yourself."
Tommy agrees. For all that they'd been terrible for each other, they'd known how the hell to take care of one another like no one's business.
"I want you to go," Tommy says, steady, quiet, nearly a snark for how deep his voice goes to hide the tremor in it.
Buck cocks a hip against the doorframe. "I want my sweatshirt."
The breath that escapes him is shaky, but her think he hides most of it behind the hand over his face, the finger pinched at the bridge of his nose.
"I can't do this."
"Exactly how many men and women do I have to fuck before you believe the future I'm looking at is with you?"
"All of them! None! It was a stupid thing to say and it's not what I meant and I can't do this."
Buck spins on his heel. Grabs the box he'd set aside and hefts it up into his arms. "I'm coming back for my sweatshirt," he says. "You let me know whether you want to talk about the data points of the sexuality spreadsheet or about us."
"There is no us, Buck." His voice sounds defeated even to himself.
"If that was true you'd just give me the stupid sweater and be done."
Tommy sits in silence. He does not get up to retrieve the hoodie. Buck is still angry, but his smile is wide and bashful.
Tommy listens to his footsteps trail down the hall, towards the door, out of it. He hears the Jeep's ignition catch, the wheels roll off the drive.
He realizes he'd left the goddamn Jeep manual open on the timing belt page, right there on his side table where he'd pointed out the things he wanted Evan to take to clear him from his life.
---
There is someone knocking at his door.
Tommy doesn't quite ignore it.
He hid the sweatshirt in one of his toolbox drawers when Evan texted him this morning to let him know he'd be over with a six pack and a pot of chili.
There's a zero percent chance Evan's getting that sweatshirt back, tonight.
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pedge-page · 1 day ago
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aww imagine when ellie is a little older and she has one of those doctor kit toys, and joel gets a cut (or maybe a bruise or something like that) and ellies like "it's okay daddy i'll help you 🥺" and she runs with her little kit and puts on the stethoscope and does a little "check up" and takes his blood pressure and checks his temperature, and then she asks where his boo boo is 😭 and then she gives it a little kiss (bc thats what joel and reader do) and she's like "all better daddy :)" 😭😭😭 please that would send me into a coma that is too cute
notes: oh my god this was so adorable to think about, thank you so much for the baby fever.... I ran a little further with this one based off this ask!
Joel Dealing with Wife: Doctor Ellie
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- - - -
Joel’s caught on to something pretty big here. His ever growing littler girl Ellie is quite the caretaker….of him especially. All he tolerated under you and Sarah finally met its match when Ellie quietly entered the world.
He started to realize it after she would burst into tears each time he’d trip on Sarah’s toys, or grunted at your shoulder slaps. But she only ever showed worry when it was him getting hurt.
And he couldn’t get enough of it. Okay sure, its wrong to make your kid worry about things they don’t understand isn’t quite worth stressing over, but he can’t help but fall into a giddy awe spell of greed seeing just how bent out she gets when she thinks he’s hurt. It started with big hugs for long minutes. Then she decided she needed to practice real medicine. The amount of bandaids this family has gone through despite no real injury is astounding to his wallet. 
But it’s commendable. She so carefully puts her warm hands over his forehead whenever he stubs his toe, or checks his pulse when he’s eaten something too hot. Doctor Ellie is always in the house, and ready to assist.
And maybe Daddy… goes a little too out of his way to bring her out.
Joel had just rammed a large plank of wood into his abdomen, not carefully checking its length before swinging it around as if he were still in his twenties. “Ugh--damnit!” He groans, clutching his side. The throb lasted for just a moment before dulling, and he was about to carry on his business when—
“DADDY!!!!” Ellie wails, followed by the patterpatterpatter of her little feet running as fast as they can take him towards his aid.
She’s etched with concern over her chunky face, grasping on her tip toes for his hands. “Daddy okay?” She asks with her high pitched, sweetie voice that gets his soft spot racing.
“Yea—No. No baby…I think—“ he clutches his side, as if remembering the near fatal accident he just suffered. “Uuughh---oh Ellie…I’m hurt. I’m hurt real bad.” He bends forward, one hand over his abdomen while the other covers his face. (He peeks through one squinted eye to see her reaction).
She gasps. “It’s okay daddy! I help make it better!”
She grasps his finger with her entire hand and leads him towards the living room. “Moo!” She commands to Spoon. “Amboolance! WEE WOO WEE!!” She waves her hands around to clear the way of the invisible traffic as Joel followed, half squatted and stiffly wobbling to match her short stature.
She quickly tosses a blanket on the carpet, pointing for Joel to lie down. He obliges, groaning more so from the cracks in his back and knee instead of the fake pain he’s been dishing out.
He watches as she digs frantically through the bin of various toys before retrieving her mobile hospital toy kit. With the stethoscope thrown on her waist (it’s for kids 8 and up and she isn’t quite the size yet), she puts the rounded part over Joel’s stomach. Then she presses her head on his injury as well, causing him to let out an oof and chuckle as she listens futally for his heartbeat. 
“I nee take look.”
She rolls up his shirt a few inches to uncover the invisible wound. 
“How bad is it, doc?” Joel pleas in dramatic desperation.
She tilts her head to the side, closing one eye with her palm before shaking her head.
“Nee sur—Sur gee.”
Joel puts together that’s surgery, and he’s starting to wonder where she’s learning all this hospital stuff….
She begins rummaging around for her other toys before announcing “Knife!”
Joel’s head sits right up, eyes wide in Father-panic mode that she may have gotten her hands on an actual—
She instead pulls her yellow and green kids-cooking toy plastic knife that is meant to part velcroed plastic vegetables, and realistically couldn’t even slice through two strands of hair. He lets out a sigh, leaning back and letting her continue with her critical patient.
“Snack time!”
Of course you just had to interrupt their special Daddy-daughter only playtime with fucking snack ti—oh is that apple slices and peanut butter?
Ellie drops everything, sits on her butt almost like a dog and awaits patiently for her snack. Conveniently Spoon has also come to sit automatically next to her, if the dog-analogy wasn’t evident enough.
“Interrupting surgery, babe,” Joel hums. 
“Surgery can wait after snack.”
Ellie wiggles her feet as you hold out a slice towards her mouth for her to bite and keep her hands clean. The room is silent minus the content, unhurried crunching of apple sizes.
“Okay baby, continue your surgery. What part are we at?” You ask, sucking a slice into your mouth as you also dip one into Joel’s open trap, giggling as he swallows it like an arcade ticket machine crunching away at his spoils. 
“Make cut,” she says plainly, searching around for that knife again.
You raise your brow suspiciously  but let any irrational thought go as she holds up her very non lethal kiddie knife.
Doctor Ellie starts serrating his belly fat back and forth with the dull piece of thick plastic.
It probably looks like real pain to her, were it not for him holding his breath as his chest and stomach puffing up and down, trying to hold his giggles and squirms together.
You watch Joel with raised brow, knowing he’s got tears in his eyes trying to play poker face so hard, knowing you’re there watching him get tickled by this thing and knowing he’s gonna deny it profusely. 
“Shouldn’t you put me under anesthesia—“
She slaps a piece of paper — the phony ticket from her train conductor set (Jesus, how many different toy sets did you guys get her?) — a little too carelessly, but enough to get the idea across that daddy needs to stop talking as she does careful work.
“Sew!” She announces, as if she has a nurse assistant handing her each tool. Although, technically, she does, but you seem more interested in wiping the plate of peanut butter and sucking it off your digits.
Joel’s eyes are closed, enjoying the serenity of lying on the floor. You don’t realize how good it is to be on the ground until you have kids, and now you’re constantly on the floor doing everything with them.
“Mommy…where sew?”
You shrug. They’ve got so many toys, you’re honestly not sure what creative thing she’s gonna come up with the “sew” Joel’s tummy. Given her use of the kids knife, you’re curious what kind of toy—
She pulls out a real sewing needle, point and sharp and definitely not kid approved along with fabric thread. It glints in her little hand for a brief moment as she dips to make contact on Joel’s skin—
“OOKAY Let’s not use that,” you yelp, grasping her arm carefully from going any further. Joel’s still got that stupid paper over his eyes, absolutely oblivious and too trusting of Ellie. 
Something else about kids: you can baby proof the fuck out of everything you didn’t even think needed baby proofing, and yet they will still —what does Jeff Goldblum say in the dinosaur movie?…—f’ind a way’. 
You remove the needle and thread from her grasp, position it inside a cotton swab and high out of her reach. You fashion a string of yarn wrapped around a q-tip instead, and hand it to her like it’s nothing. She takes it and goes back to “sewing” Joel’s tummy up, dragging the cottony tip over his naval.
His belly dips as he lets out a pained breath, trying so hard to act like he’s not tickled. 
“Am I gonna make it doc?” Joel asks curiously.
“Bluey!”
He doesn’t quite understand that answer, until she’s pulling out the packs of varied assortment of bandaids. It takes a few minutes to help her pull each sticky back off, but soon Joel’s got 4 bandaids of Paw Patrol on his stomach, one Bingo on top of his jeans, some chainsaw massacre’s on his arm, and a pretty hello kitty across his forehead. 
“All done!” She boasts happily.
“Nah uh! You need to make sure it stays better!”
“Oh—“ she bends down and kisses his belly, just like you and Joel always do whenever she gets a minor booboo. Kisses make everything better.
Minus the bacteria in your saliva but ya know it’s the placebo in the thought that really counts for the healing factor. 
“Give daddy one on the cheek for good measure,” he commands, pointing sternly into his face. She happily obliges with a fat “mmmmmwah!”
“Yay. Looks like he’ll live,” you muse a little too unhappily. Joel snickers, sitting upright. God, he somehow looks ridiculous and hot with hellow kitty plastered across his forehead. 
“Doc, do you think I need to come back in for a check up, ya know, just to see—“
But Ellie has already concluded her medical services, now hustling away to go find something else to do. 
-
Joel steps out to the backyard, where Sarah is cruising in her remote toy jeep with the 6 ducks packed in the passenger seat and trunk. 
She rolls to a stop, her brightly colored sunglasses peering up at her Dad. She sucks her ring pop silently, knowing the desperation he’s come to seek her out.
Sarah fully well knows Ellie has Joel in her back pocket, and she likes to let that play out. because ultimately… Sarah can also benefit from their needy relationship off one another.
Joel clears his throat, looking around as if he’s making an illegal trade. “I’ll give ya two ring pops if ya pretend to run me over. And not the face this time,” he warms, knowing she’’ll plea innocence to his own askings. “Just for Ellie to see.”
She sucks on her candy before pulling it out of her mouth with a loud pop. “I’d do it for free.”
----
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annebd · 2 days ago
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prompt: scotty and max fucking dirt nasty about daniel
My first ask prompt! Thank you for turning my own horny tags against me! I don’t know if I managed to get all the way to dirt nasty, but I feel like we can at least call this “potting soil rude.” ;)
Below the cut and also here at AO3.
Max and Scotty have a tenuous agreement. A custody arrangement, Scotty calls it. When Daniel had first introduced them all those years ago, he’d clearly assumed that since he loved them both, naturally they’d like each other, too. They did not. Instead, they spent the first few months of their acquaintance doing their damnedest to avoid each other’s presence while fighting over who got to spend more time with Daniel. Neither of them wanted to share their time with him with the other, and each felt that they had a more compelling reason to lay claim to Daniel’s attention. Max declared teammate dibs, while Scotty argued for compatriot rights. The arguments escalated- furious text messages interspersed with angry glares and whispered squabbling away from Daniel’s ears until, eventually, they decided that the only viable option was to share custody.
Max gets Daniel on race weekends, from Thursday all the way through to Sunday night (and if they’re celebrating a good race result, well into the wee hours of Monday morning). Scotty has free rein over the rest of the week and any non-race weekends, except for times when Daniel and Max are both in Monaco at the same time, in which case Max gets first dibs on invites to dinners, clubs, or padel dates. Scotty had tried to argue that this rule unfairly favors Max, given that Max and Daniel both live in Monaco, which immediately gives him way more Daniel-time. Max wasted no time in pointing out that Scotty also lives in Monaco, so that’s a dumb argument, and with the amount of travel they all do, there’s very little overlap in their schedules anyway, which was the whole point in the first place.
The most important rule in their agreement, though, is that Daniel remains absolutely unaware that any of this is going on. If he knew the lengths Scotty and Max were going to in order to rearrange their schedules and his, he would make that face at them. The one where his eyes go wide and soft and red rimmed. He would shake his head at them, and he would use words like “childish” and “manipulative” and “disappointed.” No. It’s better that Daniel doesn’t know.
He’s somehow never managed to catch on that Scotty doesn’t ever hang out with him on race weekends, even if he’s at the grand prix and chilling with Chloe in the Aston Martin hospitality. He’ll give Daniel a wave, a pat on the bum if they pass each other in the paddock, but he's never asked for a pass to Daniel’s garage, even though he could easily get one as a Red Bull athlete himself. And Daniel’s also never noticed that Max pretty much disappears after race weekends, only to pop up in the background of one of Martijn’s Instagram stories or on stream with the other Twitch boys, even if Daniel mentions he'd be happy to hang out if Max finds himself in LA whenever he’s there.
Over the years, they’ve reached a tentative truce over their shared time with Daniel, but neither of them has ever gotten what they truly want: Daniel himself. He’ll flirt with them all day long,  but they know he’d just as easily flirt with a brick wall if given the chance. Flirting sometimes leads to more: Daniel will get up close behind Max on the crowded dance floor at a club, brush the tease of a half chub against Max’s ass as he scoots past him, a drink in each hand and a grin on his face. He’ll wrap one arm around Max’s waist from behind, a gesture with a flourish to present him with the G&T he’d ordered for Max, and whisper “just for you, Maxy,” as he hands him the drink and presses his cock against the seam of Max’s ass. And then he’ll flounce off again, shimmying to the pulse of the music and unaware of, or simply uncaring about, the state of Max’s shorts.
Max has seen him with Scotty, knows that he acts just the same way with him. Always standing too close, legs intertwined, sharing jokes murmured under his breath or whispered too loudly in his ear. He’ll tuck himself under Scotty’s chin, fingertips of one hand tugging teasingly at the collar of Scotty's shirt, while the other hand reaches out to take a selfie that he’ll send to Max and caption “wish you were here!”
But Daniel never lets them get any closer than that. He’ll tease, flirt, hint that he wants more, but he never takes the next step- or lets Scotty or Max take it, either. Somewhere along the line, they realized that if they can’t have Daniel himself, they’ll have to settle for the next best option.
That option is this: Scotty has Max face down, ass up on his driver room floor. There’s no space in here for this, but neither of them had cared about the logistics of anything beyond getting the door shut and tearing off enough clothing to get started. Max is still wearing his Red Bull polo- the hem rucked up to his armpits. His jeans are hanging off one foot, caught on the shoe he didn’t bother to take off before he started peeling out of his clothes. Scotty is no better off- his jeans are unzipped far enough for him to have pulled his cock out, but he’s otherwise still fully clothed.
Max watches over his shoulder as Scotty coats his fingers in lube. It’s the shitty kind in a packet that Max swiped from the complimentary amenity kit in the hotel this morning and tossed at Scotty’s head as they stumbled into his driver room and started pulling off their clothes. It’s sticky and a little goopy, but it’ll do in a pinch.
Scotty opens Max up brusquely, stretching him with two and then three fingers in quick succession. Max bristles at the burn, the way he can feel a flame lick up and down his spine, unsure of whether the sensation is pleasure or pain. He breathes through the too quick stretch and the way Scotty intentionally avoids so much as brushing past his prostate. Max knows they don’t have time for gentle. The first free practice session starts in barely more than half an hour, and Max still needs to go through his warm up routine and check in with GP about the set up plan for the run. But even with all the time in the world, Scotty still wouldn’t give him the courtesy. His focus here isn’t on Max’s pleasure.
“Come on already,” Max complains. He’s reaching back with a free hand to pull Scotty in closer, trying to grab at his cock. At least when Scotty is buried in him, Max can fuck himself back onto him, guide the angle exactly where he wants it.
“Shut up,” Scotty hisses, pushing Max’s polo further up and stuffing the hem into Max’s mouth. Max is loud. Always. But here, they don’t have the luxury of being able to hide behind the anonymity of a private hotel room, where the sound of Max’s drawn out groans or high pitched squeals can be passed off as coming from one of the other rooms down the hall; nor can they rely on the ironclad NDAs of the staff on Max’s private plane, who may have overheard him more than once begging for Scotty to stop fucking around and fuck him harder. Checo’s driver room is just next door. He’ll hear if Max starts shouting the way he wants to.
Assured that the makeshift gag will do for now, Scotty grabs a handful of Max’s left ass cheek, pulling him wide, fingers of his other hand moving unceremoniously in and out of his hole. Max can feel the cool metal of Scotty’s wedding ring against him, a twin sensation to the cold slick of the lube dripping down his rim. He wonders if Chloe knows. She’s probably lounging in the Aston Martin hospitality right now, sipping casually on a glass of wine as she chats with Fernando or jokes around with Lance. Does she know that her husband is only a few dozen yards away, wiping the excess lube off his hand and onto his cock and lining it up with Max’s hole? He wonders what she’d say if she knew. He wonders what Daniel would.
He groans as the thought hits him. Imagines Daniel’s face if he walked into Max’s driver room right now, saw him splayed out like this, moaning like a whore as Scotty takes that moment between breaths to push in, his first thrust already a zero to sixty full send that has Max sliding further to the floor. His knees slip wider and his hip flexors stretch beyond the point of a pleasant ache. Rupert is going to kill him if he shows up to his pre-race warm up with a limp. Maybe Daniel would help soothe the ache. He could slide to the floor beneath them, tuck himself under Max’s juddering hips, suck the tip of his cock into his mouth as Scotty keeps pounding into him.
Max gasps and clenches down as he imagines it. Fuck, what he wouldn’t give for Daniel to burst through the door. Through the drool soaked fabric held between his teeth, he moans out a barely coherent “Daniel!”
The room is immediately quiet as Scotty stills inside him and Max inhales sharply at his own outburst. For a long moment, neither of them moves. They breathe in the shared silence for a beat, and then Scotty pulls back to sit on his haunches and grabs Max by the back of his polo shirt to haul him back with him. The change in angle has him sliding, somehow, even further down onto Scotty’s length. Max groans. From his new position on Scotty’s lap, he can feel the bite of zipper teeth against the back of his thigh. That’s going to leave a mark- another thing he’ll have to explain away to Rupert when he hops into the ice bath tomorrow.
Scotty wraps one hand firmly around Max’s chest, brushes the sharp edge of a thumbnail over Max’s nipple, drawing out a hushed squeal. He pulls Max tight against his body, cock buried balls deep inside him. As he starts moving again, stabbing staccato thrusts aimed directly at Max’s prostate, intended to tease but not satisfy, he leans in to whisper directly into Max’s ear. “Come on, Maxy. You’re not trying to get us caught, are you? Not trying to get Daniel in here to see what you look like getting fucked like this.”
Max huffs out an annoyed moan. “Like you don’t want it, too. You would be putting on a show for him. Trying to show him how good you can fuck. Which, of course, isn’t even very good at all.” 
Max knows he’s hit a nerve. It always comes down to this for them. Sometimes they’ll spend the entire time just egging each other on. It usually doesn’t take much more than the mere mention of Daniel from either of them to get things ramped up. Like clockwork, he can feel Scotty’s rhythm start to falter behind him, his thrusts becoming more and more erratic. Before he even has time to reach down for his own cock, he feels Scotty stiffen and then grind hard into him. 
Everything immediately feels wetter, the slick combo of lube and come mixing inside him as Scotty starts to pull out. Max whines, tries to clench down and keep Scotty’s dick inside him. “Don’t fucking stop, you fuck!” he whisper-shouts, trying to bounce on the flagging cock already slipping free from his hole. It’s too late. Scotty pulls out completely and shoves Max off of him to flop back to the driver room floor. He’s still fully dressed, just his bare wet cock out, lying limp on the precarious biting edge of his unzipped jeans. 
Furious and still achingly hard, Max clambers on top of him, knees spread on either side of Scotty’s hips. He grabs at Scotty’s hand and forces two fingers together before lifting up and shoving them between his legs. He refuses to look down at Scotty’s face. He knows that if he does, he’ll see that fucking smirk. He closes his eyes and throws his head back instead, so that in his mind’s eye, he can imagine that it’s Daniel beneath him, whose hand he’s riding quickly to climax. Scotty’s doing nothing to help him along, but his fingers are serviceable enough as a makeshift dildo for Max to ride, and quickly enough, he’s approaching orgasm. He comes and chokes back the cry that threatens to spill over. 
He catches his come in one hand to save it from landing directly on Scotty’s shirt. He’d deserve it, the asshole; but Max knows those aren’t risks they’re able to take. Can’t explain away the random stain or have to come up with an excuse as to why Scotty’s wearing a borrowed Red Bull t-shirt and walking away from the Red Bull end of the paddock on a weekend he’s supposed to be hanging out in the Aston Martin garage. So Max catches his come in his hand. But he can’t resist the opportunity to fuck with Scotty at least a little, so he pushes up his shirt- some obnoxious NFT branded thing- and smears his cupped hand across Scotty’s abs, painting his stomach with it before Scotty even realizes it’s happening.
“Oh for fuck’s sake,” Scotty complains and pushes Max off him for the second time. He grabs randomly for the first thing he can put his hands on to serve as a rag- the balaclava that Max is supposed to be wearing for free practice today- and uses it to wipe himself off. He tosses the balaclava at Max to finish cleaning up and then stands to tuck himself back into his jeans and zip up. 
Once they’re both mostly presentable, Max pokes his head out of the room, checks that there’s no one around to see Scotty exiting. Satisfied that they’re clear, he steps out of the way and jerks his chin at Scotty, a nod towards the door for him to get out.
“Yeah, I’m gone. See ya never, mate,” Scotty throws over his shoulder as he saunters out of Max’s driver room.
“Fuck you, too,” Max throws back at him. He glances at the clock. He’s almost late for his warm up with Rupert. Fuck.
***
The rest of the weekend is mostly business as usual. He has to sit through a lecture from Rupert about having to rush through his warm up (“Where’ve you been? And why are you so stiff in your hips today?” he asks as he takes Max through the exercises. “Do we need to add more stretching to your routine?”), and then another from GP about having to rush the prep for the practice session, but neither is out of the ordinary. He puts it on pole the next day and wins the race the day after. He takes a moment to celebrate with the team and then makes sure to seek Daniel out for the biggest hug, an arm looped around Daniel’s waist and a hand clasped at the back of his neck, holding him close. He’s only got a few more hours of custody time before he’ll have to hand him over to Scotty, and he intends to make the most of them.
After the champagne, the ceremony, the interviews, he follows Daniel to his driver room, chattering all the way about the race and how the car is finally feeling like they’ve got a handle on it this season. Daniel nods at the appropriate moments, points out things he’d noticed on track, too. Max beams. He loves talking about racing with anyone, but most especially with Daniel.
In Daniel’s driver room, Max makes himself as comfortable as he can on the small padded bench and watches as Daniel strips off his race suit and fireproofs and tosses them in a heap on the ground. He wanders around the tiny room in just his boxer briefs, which are molded to his thighs, still sweat-slick from the race. Max’s own briefs start feeling a little tight as he takes in all of the skin on display in front of him.
“What are we doing to celebrate tonight?” he asks. “Carlos told me about this new club that he and Charles have visited. We can go there together, if you want. Few G&Ts to end the weekend?”
Daniel nods while he throws on his regular clothes, and Max sighs as all that golden skin disappears from view. “Sounds good, mate. I’m all in!”
Max smiles back at him. Perfect. He’s riding the high of the win, and as the blood rushes from his brain to locations further south, he decides to press his luck. “And then tomorrow, do you want to fly with me in my plane? You can come with me to Greece for a bit, if you want.”
“Sorry, no can do, Maxy. Got plans for this week already. Besides,” he pauses halfway out the door, gives Max a sharp look over his shoulder, “it’s not your custody week, is it? Scotty wouldn’t approve.”
Max stares after Daniel as he skips down the stairs out of his driver room. Fuck.
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harufluff · 1 day ago
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kitchen antics ☆૮꒰•༝ •。꒱ა
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💬 : fluff, established relationship au, afab!reader x bf!choi-line, ⚠ idol and/or not idol au, not proofread, 0.k
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choi soobin ~ midnight snacks
nights like this consist of both you, and your boyfriend being too tired to turn the lights on, but not awake enough to go to bed. thankfully, neither you nor soobin enjoyed cooking very much. your fridge and cabinets mostly consisted of snacks that take the least amount of effort to prepare.
more under cut εϊз~
these nights are perfect to you. with soobin and yourself only having small amount of time in your days, time together is limited. sometimes laying in bed together and watching a good movie is all it takes, but other times like this, you need more.
you had woken up, already knowing by the time you opened your eyes that it was too early. no sun was shining into your shared bedroom, nor was there any sound coming in from the outside world.
propping yourself up by your elbow, you checked the digital clock that had been on your bedside table for who knows how long, reading it said 2:42. much too early to start daily tasks.
after a couple of attempts of closing your eyes and going to bed, you decided your brain was already awake. there was no way you were going back to sleep.
making sure to be as quiet as possible, you peeled the sheets of your body and slipped out of bed. soobin was always a fairly light sleeper, so you hoped with all your heart that he had not, or would not notice you weren't with him.
you made your way through the hallway of your home to the kitchen. still sleepy, you groggily made your way to the fridge, opening it to a very underwhelming reality. some leftovers from days ago, and some fruit were all that had remained from this last week. you made sure to make a mental note to get more groceries.
after looking through a series of places for something to eat, you go back to the fridge and grab the other half of a previously eaten apple. you cut it into chunks, but while cleaning the knife you used to cut it, you feel a pair of arms wrap around your torso.
"what are you eating?" you hear your boyfriend soobin's deep sleepy voice in your ear. his hair and nose poking against your neck, you reply, "b-bin, i didn't mean to wake you up,,,do you want any apple?"
you hold an apple slice up to his mouth from behind you as he takes it between his teeth. a small mumbled 'thank you' is heard from his mouth. after soobin finishes chewing and asks, "why are you awake? you said you were tired earlier. I thought you would be out cold until noon..."
"yeah i thought so too...i guess not though. you can go back to sleep though, i know you were wiped from today." soobin airily chuckles and spins you around in his arms, now being face to face. "thats alright. could stay with you?"
you give him a small nod with a smile on your face. you put your hands on his face, making him smile further and give him a small peck on his lips. "are you hungry too?" you say, seemingly more excited now.
soobin nods and helps you grab the chips from the cabinet. the rest of the night was spent with the two of you talking in the kitchen, keeping hushed voices as not to wake your neighbors. this was what you needed on nights like this. just your soobin and the quiet of night time.
choi yeonjun ~ afternoon coffee
after so long living with you, yeonjun had the fact that you are not a morning person burnt in his head. he had unfortunately suffered the angry, and the groggy side of you in the morning.
in the past, you had tried to wake up slightly earlier to have the time to get ready, then go to a local coffee place, then still have time to get to (work/school) on time.
so finally, your boyfriend had began to catch on. mornings like this one, where he had enough time to run to your favorite coffee place and bring it back home to you were not only your, but his favorite days.
for him, it was a way to make your day better, which automatically made his better. today was one of those days. you thankfully didn't have anything to do today, meaning you had planned days in advance that you were going to sleep in until 1 in the afternoon.
your boyfriend decided to plan around that, and sneak out of your shared apartment to get you your "stability," as you call it. so without you knowing, yeonjun quietly slips out of your grasp, grabs a jacket and shoes, then very softly closes the door.
as he walks back to your home from the coffee shop, yeonjun worries that you might have woken up while he was leaving, but he tries to focus on how happy you're going to be when he brings you the icy cup of iced americano.
as he walks through the door into the home you both live in, yeonjun notices the slightest bit more warmth than there was when he left. "jjun?" he hears from the hallway.
“g’morning, baby” those perfect two words were all you needed for a smile to grace your face.
"when did you leave? I barely heard you..." you ask, slightly threateningly, wanting him to stay in bed with you more. "i went to go get you your coffee, love."
your smile quickly turned into a longing look that your boyfriend knew well. he could see the desire in your eyes to snatch your drink right from his hands.
"you know me so well..." your bed head hair slightly falling into your face, which yeonjun quickly removes as you take a sip from your cold drink.
the rest of the afternoon that the both of you had free was spent back in the kitchen talking about things that the two of you had to catch up on.
jjun's favorite kitchen activities were always involving you and your happy coffee smile.
choi beomgyu ~ morning tea
your boyfriend never took much liking to a calming drink like tea until he started dating you. he always preferred beer over oolong.
summer mornings where the sky is blue as ever by 12:30 were one of the rare mornings where he felt the motivation to get up out of bed early (which is more like 9 for beomgyu)
as he slipped out of the sheets, trying hid very hardest to gently take his arm out from under your delicate head, he started to hear whining coming from you.
“where are you going…” you quietly let out, the morning still catching up with you. the two of you had stayed up late trying to finish a show you had started earlier that week, leaving you with a headache and tired eyes.
“nowhere, honey. jus’ goin to make tea.” a moment before he gets off the bed, you roll around, the sheet still pulled up to your chin. you give him an odd look, confused of why on earth your soda and beer loving boyfriend would wake up and go make himself tea.
“you’re getting tea?” you say slightly louder and more awake. beomgyu chuckles, only slightly amused at your astonishment. “would you like any? we have lemon, chamomile, oolong, i think there’s one more…”
you nod your head no, and encourage him to get it himself. tea was simply out of character for beomgyu. he was more the type of guy to get a soda in the not so early morning rather than tea.
however, your boyfriend knew that tea was one of the things in life that you see as calming and even necessary. though you don’t always want it, he sees that.
the detention of his character is that he notices the small things that you appreciate in life, then learns to love in just ask much, if not more.
you follow beomgyu’s actions and put your fuzzy socks on that lay scrunched up on the ground from the night previous. the slight nip of the air conditioned home encouraged you further to make your way to the kitchen, where you figured beomgyu would be making his tea.
you see his tall figure, broad shoulders, brown shaggy hair and all its glory standing with his back to you peacefully making his drink with a bit of honey.
“what kind did you get?” you ask, your arms circling around his small waist and peeking your head around him to see what he was up to.
not much to your surprise, it was a mess. the few times your boyfriend had made tea by himself it had always ended in disaster. “i got excited about the honey and put it in first by accident then i tried to scoop it out with the spoon but then it was sticky so i put the hot water in and then the spoon was hot and—“
he stops his ramble in the place of your little giggles towards his cute disaster. “you’re adorable, gyu. c’mon let’s clean up then maybe we can make another round.”
with a shy look in his eyes, beomgyu replies, “together this time?”
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©️harufluff 2024
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mraprilfools · 12 hours ago
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Summary: As Vox's personal Physician it's always been a challenge to get him to take care of himself. Your motives originally may have been professional, but the line started to blend somewhere along the way. Now you're determined to get him to listen.
Pairing: GN!Reader x Vox
Contents: Mostly self-indulgent fluff. Bashful Vox, Doctor Reader, Assertive Reader, Reader has Glasses, Kissing, Lots of Flirting and Banter, Vox is a dork, Vox has freckles he hides
Word Count: 8k
A/N: Dedicated to @6esiree for her Follower contest! Please accept my humble Vox fluff. As for my followers, keep an eye out for tomorrow's Imagine for a very special message from The Heart of a Machine's Vox!
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“You need to cut down on your caffeine consumption. Not only are you hopelessly addicted, but your quality of sleep is suffering as a result.” The tests had been taken again, and again, and again at your boss’ request. As a professional, you had standards. You weren’t going to let something as stubborn masculine machismo bother you. But the results on your medical chart had been almost completely static. The metallic nub of your pen rapped against the clipboard over the offending results that kept staring you back in the face.
Vox was hunched over on the examination table, refusing to face you. Already slipping on the buttons of his dress shirt.
“I didn’t say that the examination was over sir.” You reminded him, pressing up the glasses hanging on the bridge of your nose.
The artificial glow of that screen finally turned to greet you. The artificial smile he had was so kind to constantly parade in your presence, as obnoxious as always. “I am well aware, but I am saying it’s over. You don’t know what you’re doing.”
A challenge to your ability. A bold one too. There were few doctors knowledgeable enough in both machinery and biology. Fewer fanatical enough to learn the harmonious weaving inside your employer so you found the accusation funny. All but a single, “Ha” came out in a scoff.
Sparks of electricity crackled from Vox’s antennae, and the large crimson pools narrowed into squints. “And what’s so funny Doc?”
“You are Darling. If you wanted to get rid of me, we both know you would have long ago.” You curled your lips in a smirk, a clear defiance of your boss. With only half of his buttons slipped through, he gave up on the rest and rose to his feet. Long legs made quick strides over to you to make a direct challenge. Even when he stood nearly a foot over you, you didn’t feel intimidated in the least. You dropped the clipboard over to the counter, meeting his gaze defiantly, but cooly.
A foot stepped between your legs, and his body came close. You took a step back only for the sake of your balance, then another until he had your back against a wall. His hands pinned you in place while the eerie glow of his screen only grew more intense. There was a false cheer in Vox’s voice even as his smile never dropped.
“You’re cute, Doc. You’ve made yourself valuable, so you’re right. I give you a lot more slack than I would tolerate from anyone else in this worthless shit heap. However…” He pried one hand free to clap around your jaw. Holding you in place when the bladed end of his thumb pressed against your cheek, drawing a bead of blood from the pinpoint. A directed threat, no doubt to remind you that he could kill you at any time.
But he hasn’t.
“More people are falling to hell every day, you won’t be so unique forever.”
“So you admit that I’m one of the few who do know what they’re doing. So, can I count on you cutting down your coffee consumption down to three cups a day?”
His chest rose and fell as the energy left him. Vox pulled his hand away and returned to fixing up the buttons on his shirt. Turning his back to you to fetch the sweater vest thrown over the table, slipping it on next. A zipper on the side turned out to be the secret around putting on clothes when your head was a large television. Having a tailor right in the tower must be quite useful. “I can do the coffee. However, I don’t have time to sleep the full six hours you are recommending.”
“Daily.” You remind him.
He spun back around, uttering a scoff as his hands slipped through each sleeve of his blazer. The pointed cyan claws slid across the lapels. “Daily?! Now you’re just being ridiculous Doc.”
“Have I been known to tell you jokes, Vox?” You lifted a brow.
“Yes, actually. You make jokes about how stupid half of my employees are all the time. The other half you have creative insults about how brutish, boring, or pathetic they are. I’m starting to think you don’t like anyone in the tower...” Vox raised both his brows, sporting that smarmy little grin.
“Because I don’t, save a few exceptions.” You answered. “I’m not paid to like people. I’m paid to keep you healthy.” You pushed off the wall, seating yourself in the single office chair that had been afforded for the office. The leather squeaked with the new weight, wheels shifting from the sudden weight that had you barreling toward your coffee cup. You draped one leg over the other, pressing your back against the chair while you gave your boss your undivided attention.
The cyan eyes rolled within the crimson pools. At last, his bow tie was tied around his neck perfecting the image of the business CEO. Almost a shame how quick he always was to put his clothes back on. The technological and biological nature of his body was a near obsession of yours; even if you never admitted it.
“Is the friendship-making package extra?”
You raised your shoulders in answer. You hooked your fingers around the mug on the desk with your cup of coffee. The irony of it after telling him to cut his consumption didn’t bother you. “Do you want me to make friends Vox? I don’t see how that would benefit you at all.”
“It won’t.” He admitted as he walked by. The chair was sent backward as his claws laid hands on it, forcing you to make eye contact when he lingered from behind. “Only wondering how much I pay you goes into pretending to like me.”
You couldn’t help but break out into more laughter. The sight of which earned a sultry frown and a retraction of the hand that had come so close to him. You caught your glasses, preventing them from careening off your face. “You don’t pay me anything for that sir, you’re one of the few people in hell I do like.”
“You have a weird way of showing it… telling me to take care of myself.” He chuffed, shooting a nasty glare at the coffee in your hands. Unaffected, you took a sip. He could cope.
“I know, I’m a trailblazer. Do you need me to prescribe you sleeping pills or do you think you can handle it?”
Vox laughed, “Doctor, please! I can do something as simple as fall asleep! Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to get back to work.” Even if you couldn’t see it, you could almost feel that eye roll looking at the back of his head. The door clicked shut behind him, leaving you with that curt goodbye.
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Vox, however, never listened to his doctor. Even IF you were always right. It was a hunch as you were finishing up writing up samples for the night. But the thought came to mind to check on your boss to see if he was heeding your well-intentioned advice. Your employee keycard gave you generous access, only beneath the Vee’s who could go everywhere. So it wasn’t any trouble stopping by that ridiculous office of his.
He was seated before a mural of monitors depicting snapshots of the lives all across Pentagram City. Wires were currently plugged into the back of Vox’s head, absorbed in his… information-gathering activities. Vox was completely unaware of your presence. You breathed a heavy sigh, resigning to the fact that you once again had to get this man to take care of himself. You passed through the bridge without fear, where the circling shark tanks beneath spoke of a deadly fall several floors down. Such a waste of space for an aesthetic. Your polished shoes smacked into the back of the chair, startling the Overlord within.
Arcs of electricity shot out from all angles. Coating the chair and his body as the wires all unplugged from their ports one by one and the frantic man spun around with an intense swirl in his right eye. The claws extended, drawing gouges in the rests beside him. All the fight in him sputtered out the instant he caught sight of you, painted over with annoyance.
“Doc! I did not call for you. What are you doing here?”
With your arms folded across your chest, you answered. “Coming to catch you red-handed. You should be sleeping.”
“Shouldn’t you?” He fired back, hunching low.
Touche, but you wouldn’t admit it. You pushed up the frame of your glasses before you answered.
“It’s not my fault the help I have in the lab is so incompetent. I can’t trust them to do something as simple as label specimens. It would be a terrible safety risk if I left it to them. If anything, I am a hero of Voxtek.”
Vox laughed, leaning back into his chair. It was genuine laughter, unlike that dorky evil cackle he thought nobody ever heard when he was alone. A palm smacked his thigh, with a crooked grin sliding heavy to the right of his screen. “Sounds like we’re both guilty, Doctor. I won’t tell if you don’t.”
“Tell who exactly?” You asked, striding up to the man. You sat on one of his thighs spread so wide it was practically an invitation. The overlord stiffened, digging his claws back into the plastic armrest, staring a hole at you. “What darling? There aren’t any other chairs and you wouldn’t have me stand the whole time would you?”
“No, I just didn’t expect you to try and seduce me.” He answered.
“Ah? And why do you think I am trying to seduce you?” You sent the question back to him, easing until your back pressed against the rest. You threw one leg over the other, balancing yourself by clutching the armrest. Your fingers only brushed against the cyan claws and he instantly yanked them out of reach.
“Oh, do you sit in any man’s lap then? And here I thought I was special.”
“I don’t like most people, Vox. You are special.”
Unexpectedly, the words brought a strange light blue glow to Vox’s face. He was just as shocked as you were, throwing an arm to cover the strange color in his face. There was an attempt to hide it as his face turned away, but he didn’t throw you off so you took that as a victory.
“What do you want?”
“For you to go to bed darling, that should be obvious.”
When he lowered the arm, you could see a deep frown on his display. The technicolor eyes bore into yours, locking you in eye contact trying to force the truth from you. A common tactic as most couldn’t lie while maintaining eye contact. But you were telling the truth so you made yourself comfortable admiring the view until the silence made him give up. With a sigh, he put his hand on your back and forced you back to your feet.
“Alright, I’ll go to bed, Doctor.” Vox shoved you off, forcing you back to your feet. He refused to even touch you, only lurching forward until you were forced to either catch yourself or fall. With a low grumble, you fixed your coat, keeping well away from the ledge.
Vox took two steps toward the bridge when he stopped and turned to look at you. “Do you flirt with all your patients?”
“Well darling, considering that you are my only patient? Yes.”
Vox chuffed, hooking a thumb forcefully into his pocket. The back of the TV greeted you, shoulders rolling as he weighed your answer. “And before I hired you, how many of your patients did you hit on?”
A single digit tapped your chin, which meant thinking back to something that hardly mattered. How often you satisfy your urges shouldn’t matter to your boss. But for the sake of this flirting to keep going you obliged. “Only the hot ones darling. I jump the bones of the ones I want nothing to do with besides their dick. But I take my time with the ones I really like.”
More electricity danced from his antennae. To busy his hands, Vox tugged and pulled at his bowtie. There was a joyful lilt in his tone as he answered, “Interesting. Good night Doctor.”
“Good night, Vox.” You followed right behind him, smiling with satisfaction. You felt happy that you finally got him to see reason, even if it meant flirting a little.
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Or so you thought.
The next day, you decided to make another visit to his office to check if he went to bed on time. He was still plugged into the system, in the early hours of the morning. A little more flirting and back and forth was just as effective.
And the next day. There he was far more cold, not passing the buck back to you. But when you tried to excuse yourself, he’d find some excuse to make you stay for a minute or two longer.
And the next day too! Each time conning you into spending a little extra time with him. At first, it was only fifteen minutes. Then half an hour, and then you ended up lingering for a WHOLE hour. That was when you realized that if this got any worse, YOUR work would suffer.
Now that? That was unforgivable.
At this point, you suspected he was doing this on purpose. When you came charging down the bridge that evening, he was already spinning in place to greet you. You were expected. The bastard. The plugs in the back of his head popped free. Vox spun around in time to greet you with a wide smirk on his screen that faltered when his chair ended up swerving a little too far to the right. A heel smacked against the floor, giving him friction to push him back.
“You saw nothing,” Vox said.
“Pretty sure I did, you are up late. Again.”
“I slept yesterday. I’ll take care of it tomorrow.” Vox bent forward in his chair, looking smug. He was intentionally trying to rile you up now. You didn’t even attempt to hide your sigh. You glanced over to the monitors, still the same old surveillance for the most part. But there was one screen that stood out. The man was on Veddit. You adjusted your glasses to get a better look. Upon closer look, it was some subveddit asking advice about how to tell when somebody has a crush on you.
He was so pathetic it was endearing sometimes. His eyes followed yours, doing a double take when he noticed what you were looking at and smacked the console turning all the monitors off. Vox’s voice came out filtered as he attempted to sound assertive. “That’s classified company information. Nothing you are meant to be privy to Doctor. I’ll have to fire you if you keep looking.”
“I didn’t know relationship advice was sensitive company data. Are you having trouble with men, Vox?”
A faint blue light covered Vox’s screen beneath his eyes, his cyan pupils unable to meet you. Teeth clenched, his fingers rapped loudly against the armrests of his chair. You kept silent, watching him stew under the uncomfortable silence. His knee began to bounce, his fingertips clacking against the hard plastic until at last he groaned and rolled his eyes. “No! I could have anyone I wanted in Pentagram City in my bed by the end of tomorrow night if I wanted.”
Laughter spilled before you could help it. The sound inspired a swirl from his right eye, and another tense clutch of his claws gouging his chair. “What’s so funny?”
“You darling. You’re adorable.”
The color on his face grew more intense, as did his frown. He made some incoherent mumbling you couldn’t quite understand, but you were pretty sure at least one of those was an insult.
“How about a bet then, Darling? Whoever can bring a new partner into their bed first wins? If I win, you promise to go to bed no later than 1 AM. And if you win…” You sucked through your teeth, watching as his screen grew even more pale. A cyan claw nervously wove around the bow tie on his neck.
“If I win, you’re all mine for an evening,” Vox interjected.
Now there was a surprise, so he could take the lead. The man was already pushing himself up to his feet, stretching his back as he rose to his full height. “It’s about time I remind you who you work for.” Now he was compensating, with that blustering smile and the way he pulled on his lapels.
“Then it is settled! You can have an entire evening to see if you can make me as obedient as the rest of your employees.” You agreed. Unknown to Vox, you already had a plan that secured your victory. But you let him stew in the joy of his deal a little longer. The way his smile took up half his screen was endearing.
A pointed end met your chin as he forced you to look at him, the harsh artificial light shining a little too close for comfort. “I’ll make you sing for me, Doc. Though you are right… I’d almost miss your backbone. Almost.”
The screen was coming in close, dangerously so. With nowhere to go with that claw currently suck in your chin, you brushed away the mood with a question. “Would my magnanimous boss be willing to walk me home? Things have been rather dangerous in my neighborhood lately.”
Suspicion immediately colored his expression, with arcs of lightning dancing along his frame. Vox whipped his hand away, standing ramrod straight. “Didn’t you want me to go to bed? Trying to get a head start on me Doc?”
You coyly tilted your head. “No? If you’re that worried about that I can get somebody else to walk me. I’m pretty sure I could easily get Papermint to--”
A metallic claw smacked your shoulder, pointed ends digging into your flesh as a strained smile greeted you. Vox’s laughter came out deeply filtered. “That won’t be necessary! That man couldn’t defend you from a paper bag. I’ll be winning our little wager before the night ends, as I said. So I’ll gladly see you home and asleep while I take my victory.”
The pinprick stung, but it was a kind of pain that sent a shiver down your spine. Your hand laid over his, feeling the cool skin beneath for only a second before he yanked it away.
That was now the second time he yanked his hand from yours. Curious.
“Not if you are sleep-deprived, Vox. Come on then, it’s a bit of a walk through a bad neighborhood so I hope you aren’t too fond of your shoes.” You spun around first, taking the lead down the bridge. The larger overlord quickly strode over to catch up to you, refusing to let you guide him. Hands behind his back, he continued to stare at you from the corner of his screen, and he was terribly obvious.
“What is it darling?” You asked.
“...Can you stop calling me that?”
“What, darling?”
There was an uneasy shifting as he pushed out his pockets. The electronic door hissed open when the two of you approached by the proximity of the Overlord alone. The two of you took a turn down the hallways, empty and feeling almost haunted at these early hours.
“Yes.”
By how short the answer was, you suspected he wasn’t going to give you a reason why. As confident and blustering the man could be, there were always these little nuggets of insecurity that oozed. He was overcompensating. For most people, they wouldn’t bother to look any deeper. People were far more inclined to see what they wanted to see or to ignore anything that would be far too bothersome to address. A fact Vox relied on far too much.
Because you took an undeniable interest in this man. You knew his body better than anyone as his doctor. Knew how his heart was nothing but to ease his body dysmorphia. How he regulated his heat, how viruses affected his body, and how a simple cold could still lay him low. Initially, you wanted nothing more than to tear him open and learn everything but lately… you wanted to solve the riddle behind the little things. Such as why he wouldn’t let you touch his hand. Or why his screen always got a little brighter when you entered the room.
But if you pushed somebody too hard who didn’t want to be known, you risked pushing them away. This would require a delicate touch.
“Very well, I will have to call you something special then.”
There was another flash of static as Vox pushed the call elevator button. The repeated shifting of his cyan irises was so obvious you had to hide your smile underneath your palm pretending to hide a cough.
“Like what? Voxxy?”
“Voxxy is cute...” You admitted with a shrug, “But that’s not special. I’m sure you’ve had plenty of exes call you that.”
Fragmentation flashed over this screen at that moment, the crimson pools almost comically large in his screen. The ding of the elevator was his saving grace, striding in quickly to save face. “I’ll let you know if you pick something unique then.”
Unique. Most people would likely pick something with his name or his head. Picture Box, Plasma, Sparky. In the silence of the elevator, you leaned against the wall and considered it. A nickname for you alone to call him. Vox joined you. Leaning against the wall almost close enough to touch but you knew better than to reach out and chance him pulling his hand away a third time.
“Dove.”You suggested.
“That’s… uh--” Vox let out a breathy chuckle. “Quite an old-fashioned nickname don’t you think? I think people stopped using that decades ago.”
“Do you dislike it…?”
Claws settled on the rail behind him, clicking against the bare metal. Each metallic noise sent shivers up your spine, seeing them so close but out of reach.
“I don’t dislike it, no. I’m not quite so nostalgic as half of Hell seems to be, but I can appreciate the effort.” The rare gentle smile on his screen was a sort you’d never seen before. Not the fabricated nonsense to disarm viewers or the manic joy when he was doing something comically evil.
Ping
The elevator came to a sudden halt as it hit the first floor. You stepped out first, with your boss lagging shortly behind. Thanks to how early in the morning it was, the two of you weren’t especially bothered by employees or gawking pedestrians. Hell in the early evenings was often when you could find the worst of it. Drunkards, people stabbed in the middle of the streets, demons locked in heat fucking in any half-discreet location they could find. It was a place of sin and debauchery and everyone happily indulged. Vox was a wary individual you learned from watching him.
Despite being one of the most powerful men in the Pride Ring he constantly watched the streets looking for threats. Occasionally he would catch you looking at him, blush, and look away. After the third or fourth time, he scoffed and tugged on his collar.
“Why do you keep staring at me like that? Actually- WHY are you flirting with me so blatantly? Are you trying to get a promotion?”
“Can I be promoted from your personal physician?”
“No.”
“Then the only reason is because I like you.”
There was a question of why, obvious by the way he looked at you full of confusion. “I… wasn’t expecting such an honest answer.”
You laughed. “This is hell Dove, there’s nothing to be gained by being shy. Somebody else might try to sink their claws into you first and I don’t like to lose.”
“Your wager seems counter-intuitive to your goal.” Vox rolled his eyes. Yet at the same time, he was reaching out to you. His claws bumped against your fingertips for only a fraction of a second. They were cold and sharp to the touch, but having conquered the wall put a pep in your step.
“On the contrary, I believe it’s proven quite effective. You are taking me home so another man doesn’t.”
“I-Wait, were you manipulating me?!”
You laughed again, hiding your great smile behind your hand. “I was! But you manipulate all of hell daily so I think you’ve lost all right to hold that against me.”
Vox stopped, narrowing his great big eyes. “I could leave right now, or did you account for that in your plan too?”
“Mmn, no I had planned to drag you into my bed tonight.”
A bright blue blush flashed over the man’s screen, his arm rising to try and hide it. Sparks and electricity danced between each prong. “I--! That’s not what we bet on!”
“No? The bed was to drag a new partner into our beds tonight. I’ve never been with you, so you count Dove.”
Still masking his face, Vox was now wavering, looking behind him as he tried to determine whether to foil your plot now or fall prey to it. Even this game of indecision was fun to watch. He sucked through his teeth, tapping his foot against the concrete.
“Doesn’t telling me your plan ruin your chances?”
“No, to my experience telling a man point blank you want them is far more effective than being shy about it. Am I wrong?” You flashed a smile full of teeth. “Of course, it also has a chance to backfire and make them so nervous they run. But I don’t believe you aren’t quite that timid.”
“Tch, hardly. Fine.” His claw clamped around your wrist. Cold, awkward, and grating against your bone it wasn’t quite what you imagined. You had a strong suspicion it was that exact reason that made him so hesitant to touch you before. He dragged you forward, but after you reached the end of the street he realized that he had no idea where he was taking you. When he looked at you for help, you laughed. As predicted, he sulked.
“Sorry, sorry! You are just so cute! We’re almost there. It’s that apartment over there.” You pointed straight ahead to a sleek modern apartment. It was one of the nicer buildings in the Entertainment district, one of Voxtek’s provided housing. The familiar V on the building clued Vox in.
The walk became closer to a power walk as he took you into your apartment. Having to at least concede to let you lead to take him to your apartment on the third floor, fourth door down the hall. He was deathly silent watching you unlock the door, following behind you as quietly as a mouse inside. That same nervous jitters returned to the usually powerful and confident CEO as he found himself in a strange apartment that wasn’t his own. Perhaps he expected you to jump his bones immediately but you instead took off your shoes, and lab coat, and made your way inside.
“Would you like tea, Dove? Sleepy-time tea ought to help you fall asleep.”
“Fall… asleep?” Vox asked. All the wind in his sails had fluttered out, baffled by the turn of events.
“Yes darling, what did you think I was taking you to my bed for? You are up past your bedtime.” You didn’t even attempt to hide the smug smile on your face, so instead you focused on filling a kettle and setting it on the stove.
“I--- You tricked me!”
“Indeed I did. Are you upset?”
To your surprise, he wasn't. He was deathly silent, standing in the hallway lost, unsure of what was going on. A claw hooked around his bow tie, untying it to make himself comfortable. Next came off the blazer, and then the top hat left on the coat rack by the door. Normally meant only to contain your coat, it added a touch of domesticity to see your coat have a partner. The blue and white looked nice. Could only hope the two of you would meld just as harmoniously. Vox sat down at your dining room table, taking a look around your abode.
“I’ve never been dragged into somebody's place to only sleep with them before. You’re… an odd one Doc.”
“I’ve been told.” You answered in a sing-song tone, preparing the tea cups. A packet of sleepy-time tea tucked into each porcelain cup with saucers meant to carry a touch of your personality. “I like you too much to bed you this early.”
“I-- don’t get that. If you like me, doesn’t that mean I’d already be inside you, fucking you on your kitchen counter?” Vox scoffed, rapping his nails against the table. The kettle hissed with steam when the water was ready. After laying down the teacups and saucers you popped the kettle off the stove and poured into each cup. Joining your boss from the chair directly across from him.
“Come now, isn’t that how courtship used to work? A man would get to know a woman, and show her that he really liked her for her and not just her body. It’s like that Dove. Now, I would love to unwrap you but I’m more curious to know the man you are. Like-- why don’t you like it when I touch your hand?”
Vox twitched, pulling his hand immediately off the table, suddenly self-conscious. “Who said I don’t like you touching my hand sweetheart?” He forced that fake smile of his, taking a friendly artificial tone.
“Because you keep pulling it away whenever I touch it.”
The smile fell, and his eyes fell toward the amber liquid in the cup. He lifted the cup, testing to see if it had enough time to steep. It had not even been a minute, so all he tasted was hot water. He set the cup down, feeling bitter. “What if I don’t want to talk about it?”
“Then you don’t have to. But I want to know.”
The chair skid back, with your boss leaning forward. “Let’s… forget this getting-to-know-me bullshit Sweetheart. It’s stupid, this is hell. I can fuck you until your eyes roll into the back of your head and forget this whimsy of yours Doc. You're my employee. Nothing more.”
You set your chin on the nest of your overlaid hands, matching his eyes. You pushed a little too hard. “No, you’re getting your sleep whether you like it or not. If we have to sit here in silence, I’m making sure you get the sleep you need, Vox.”
Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap.
Vox’s shoulders rose and fell with his sigh. Waiting three minutes for tea to steep felt like an eternity to him. “A secret for a secret Doc. I’ll tell you why, but in return, you need to tell me something you’ve never told anyone before.” An accusatory finger jut your way.
“Do you want to get to know me too, Dove?” Unafraid, you coyly tilted your head. Vox opened his mouth to respond, shut it, and turned his screen.
“...Yes. I’ve never had somebody care this much for my health or try to get to know me. You’re weird, but not in a… bad way I guess. I’m not saying-- you’ll ever be more to me than an employee-- don’t get the wrong idea.” He quickly interjected his point. But the shuffling in his chair and the way he weighed his words so heavily you were liking your chances. “But I like talking to you Doc.”
“Well...” You began, skidding your foot against the floor. “I was once madly and deeply in love with a man before. I was utterly, completely besotted in a way I bet you never would have expected. I wrote and sang him poetry. Spent many evenings dancing with him by candlelight, and had disgustingly kinky sex in public spaces. But my favorites were always the nights when he’d be gentle with me like I was the most precious thing in all worlds.”
Vox’s mouth hung open and then shut. A fresh shade of color danced across his screen at the bold confession “You’re… right. I have a hard time believing that. You’re the last person I imagined being a romantic.”
You sputtered a laugh. “Right? I was surprised too. Have you ever been in love like that before?”
“I’m not answering that question.” He immediately shut you down. “I don’t like you touching my hands because… most people are scared of them. They hurt, they’re cold, they aren’t nice to hold at all. They’re great, don’t get me wrong! When I need to get people in line they’re a fantastic tool for intimidation. But well, we’re demons. I’m not… built for intimacy. Inside or out.” Voxmotioned over his body with the aforementioned hands.
“They’re beautiful hands though, Vox. When you grabbed my wrist it hurt a little but it wasn’t a bad pain. They’re more than worth it for you.”
The familiar blush returned, coming with such a vengeance you swore you saw some white pixels mixed in within the blush. Like a nebula reflected on his screen, little imperfections that made him look endlessly beautiful. “Noted. So, what happened to that guy? You wouldn’t be bothering with me if he was still in your life.”
“We were… incompatible. There’s a piece of me that’s broken beyond repair inside that made me fundamentally wrong for him. It wasn’t his fault or mine. Closer to mine I suppose, since I cannot quiet the demon inside me that threatens to tear my guts out raw from envy.” The memory came bitterly, mostly because it came with a realization that even for the man you loved most you couldn’t be fixed.
A cyan claw hooked through the handle, with Vox sipping his tea. He had grown deathly silent, draining the cup until it was down to its dregs all in one. It hit the saucer with a clatter. “You should drink your tea doctor.”
Silently you obliged, taking more reserved sips. Truthfully you didn’t need it as much as he did. Habit and a circadian rhythm did wonders in getting your body trained for sleep. But for the sake of calming your nerves, taking this man to your bed where you would not take his clothes off felt oddly more intimate than taking them off. The heel of his shoes clicked multiple times against the floor, Vox was completely incapable of sitting still. At one point he even got up, walking around your apartment.
“Doc? Where’s your bathroom?”
“Back near the entrance Dove. To your right.”
“Thank you.” He disappeared into the bathroom, shutting the door behind him. You could hear the faucet running shortly after. While he took care of his business you finished your tea and washed the dishes. He was already out by the time you put the kettle in the sink.
“So, do you have anything for me to sleep in?”
“Mmm, I have a shirt of my exes if that works that should fit you. But I don’t have any bottoms. You’ll be fine in your underwear won’t you?”
He shrugged. “I mean, I’m fine to sleep naked. As long as that shirt doesn’t have you know whose face on it.”
“Of course not Dove, I would not tolerate merchandise of anyone who believes technology should have stopped in the thirties. That goes against everything I believe in.” You flippantly waved your hand as if you could hardly entertain the idea. To your surprise, Vox’s screen illuminated with light, with a big genuine toothy smile on his face.
“I changed my mind, I might be able to make an exception for you.”
“Of course Vox, it was only a matter of time before you saw my charm! Now… come on.”
Even if you were a Doctor who didn’t need a man or woman, you loved having a large bed to lounge in taking up nearly your entire room. You had your knick-knacks and other decorative items. A bookshelf of medical textbooks lined against the back of the bed for those late nights reading. Laundry piled up a little higher than you would have liked when you were bringing a boy over. A disturbing little skeleton you named Mr. Bones sitting on your computer desk. Diagrams and telltale signs of countless nights hunched over a desk. Signs of the passion of whatever gripped your mind and forced quill to meet paper.
Vox was obvious in the way he took in the various objects in your bedroom. His interest in getting to know you seemed genuine. You fished out the old shirt from your ex, which was a harmless plain white buccaneer shirt. You could see the confusion on his face when he was handed it, but you said nothing.
You grabbed your pajamas and disappeared into the master bathroom to change. Leaving Vox the whole bedroom to change. When you saw yourself in the bathroom mirror, you could spy a faint color present on your cheeks. Sure, maybe you could act cool and confident. But the truth was, you did like this man. Otherwise, why else would you go to all this trouble for him?
All your feigned confidence but you took care that your hair looked nice when you brushed it. You picked out your favorite pair of pajamas. You brushed your teeth and put on only a little spritz of perfume, as your heart beat with anticipation and hope.
Vox was already laid out on top of the bed, waiting for you. His monitor raised to look at you when you opened the door, propping his body halfway up with his elbows. “Huh, you did simply change into your pajamas. Was half expecting you to change your mind and pick out something sexy.”
“We can save that for after you’ve taken me to dinner, Dove.” A laughter followed after your statement, a friendly one. You stepped over to your nightstand to hit the switch next to a strange black and white orb. Vox did arch a brow, but his gentle smile remained.
“I’ll think about it.” The overlord fell back onto the bed, staring at the ceiling. That was perfect timing!
After you hit the light switch, the room was submerged in darkness. The purpose of the strange device on your nightstand became obvious when Vox spied the star system being projected over the ceiling. Creating a fabrication of the starry night sky that had been robbed from the two of you when death came. Vox’s right claw stretched out, reaching his hand out as if he could grasp the slowly rotating stars. The illumination of his screen slowly died until it became a dim pale blue light.
You crawled into bed opposite of him. Laying on your side with your arm tucked under the pillow to act as extra leverage while you watch the man beside you enjoy the sight above.
“You REALLY are a romantic. I’m expecting roses when you take me to dinner.” Vox joked.
“I’ll consider it. So, what makes you say that?”
“I may have had my hints when you told me you wanted to wait for sex. And oh I don’t know, The night light and nickname? You are aware of what Dove means right?”
Vox rolled onto his side, using the pillow as a gentle cushion for his screen. Normally looking right into a bright blue light wasn’t the best idea when you were trying to sleep. But the sight of that gentle smile on his face felt like it was going to lead you to some nice dreams. “Of course I do. And you were intentionally staying up late so I’d come and see you. I think you’re secretly a romantic too, Vox.”
The familiar blue flush dazzled his screen, something even pulling the blanket over to try and hide it couldn’t help with. The way his face glowed made the proof even more apparent when he only tried to mask it in darkness. “Nonsense. I’m just a machine.”
The statement came out in a half-whisper. By the way, his eyes widened at that moment, you suspected he had not meant to be that honest. A scowl took the place of his smile, and he fell back onto his back to hide his face from you. You didn’t let him run. You pushed yourself up and sat beside him, staring down at the screen that tried its best to watch the wavering astral movements above.
“You’re not a machine, Dove. And I would know that more than anyone, save yourself. Machines aren’t lonely for one.”
“I’m not lonely...” Vox bitterly retorted.
You stretched your hands out for his screen. He leaned back into the pillow, setting his cyan irises on you immediately. With your fingertips only inches apart, you met those eyes without moving an inch more.
“Do you not want me to touch you?”
“What good is touching me there? I can’t even feel it, you know.”
“Because it always makes me happy when somebody simply touches me without expectation of sex. Makes me feel beautiful.”
A complicated expression flashed over the screen. Alternating between vulnerability, a scowl, the widened sclera, and at last acceptance. His hand laid over yours and guided it to brush and trace over the hard plastic that housed his screen. The cool hand lingered on top of your palm, guiding your hand up toward where his prongs stuck out on top of his head. Following his lead your fingertips brushed along the metal prongs, then circled the receivers on the top.
“Maybe… I’m a little lonely.” He begrudgingly confessed.
Something cold suddenly brushed against your cheek, intense thanks to the heat that made a home there. The back of Vox’s claws brushed over your face, and you leaned into it. His palm filled the swell of your cheek, the harsh points nestled into the hair to cushion their prick. The thumb stretched out to tap your bottom lip, tracing the shape.
Slowly the two dark silhouettes you both cast on the wall came together melting into one. Vox guided you forward as his own body bent forward to meet you halfway. Shortly after you closed your eyes, the gentle sensation of his lips finally met yours. The edged fingers slid along the nape of your neck, sending chills down your spine while he held you. Entangling his fingers within your hair to hold you in place. Chaste and sweet, it was only a light brushing as he whispered to you.
“Your right doc… this is nice. I want to touch you more, may I?” Each little new syllable brought that ticklish feeling back, tingling with the natural static on his face. You sealed your lips against him, drinking deep from what he’d been teasing you with all this time.
“As long as the clothes stay on Dove.”
“Of course. This is nice… I don’t want it to end.” The confession came with the feel of his palm now brushing over your shoulder. Tracing down your arm until his fingers circled the wrist that had kept you supported all this time. He tugged you forward until your body fell on top of his. It was harder than the average man’s body and less cushy. The heat of your body was sapped even through the two layers of clothing, but it only gave him an excuse to wrap that blanket around the two of you.
You righted yourself until you laid flat across his body, with his arms coming around to circle your back. You buried your head into his chest, taking in his scent, wrapping your arms around his torso as you surrendered to his touch. The pointed end of one claw ran up and down your back, sending shivers down your body each time it came to meet the nape of your neck. It wasn’t a sexually thrilling sensation, but it was pleasant enough to eke out a moan. Instead of excitement, the man underneath you chuckled. Vox ran his claws through your hair instead, scratching your scalp.
“Why don’t you like to be called Darling?” You dared the question, feeling closer than ever now that the two of you were touching. The sound of his artificial heart beating against his chest and into your ear felt nothing like the machine he purported himself as. Nor was the careful way he touched you. You could feel its absence far more when his hands froze. You dared to look up, and you could see the heartbreak reflected in his eyes alone.
“It reminds me of somebody else, a man I’d rather not think of when I’m with you Doc.”
“I’d never want you to look like that when you think of me… so I will endeavor to be nothing like him, Dove.”
Vox smiled, curling a claw around a lock of your hair to brush out of your face. “And even if you are broken, I will make you feel whole one day Doc.”
Now that was unfair. How dare the vulnerability you share with him be used against you! You fought back the emotions that welled up, the brush of his hands bringing you back down against his chest made you feel like it’d be alright.
“We should get some sleep. But I want to keep holding you if that’s O.K.”
You leaned forward, kissing him goodnight. Vox kept you there for a moment longer, squeezing your shoulder. The other hand pressed against the arch of your back to press your body against his. Each little brush of those lips against yours felt addicting. Making you want to keep diving in back for more. Sometimes it was crooked, other times he’d steal your breath and keep you there. It was only the need for air that forced you two to part. A flushed face stared back at you with the beautiful nebula of freckles returned in full force.
You didn’t want to part, much as the sirens call for sleep called for you. You pressed your fingertips against his screen right beneath his eyes. Tracing each little freckle to make constellations with them. Vox closed his eyes, accepting your touch this time. The gentle wavering of his cyan irises watching you stole your breath. If only you could stay up all night and kiss each little star on his face.
But all good things had to come to an end. Vox pressed against your shoulders to force you to lie down. His own body came hovering over yours for a brief few beautiful moments, the starry sky above him framing behind him.
“You’re blushing so hard right now, Doc.”
A squeak escaped you, pressing a hand against your now hot cheeks. Gentle laughter broke out from the man above.
“You’re so cute… I can’t wait to see how red you get when I bed you for real.” The whisper of that promise came with a claw tracing along your jawline.
“When…? You sound so certain.” The blood rushing to your head made it hard to come up with a snappier comeback than that.
“Because I have already decided. I intend to win you over with everything I have. Goodnight, Doc.”
He fell back back onto the bed, lying on his side. Immediately wrapped his arms around you to pull you closer until your back was held flush against his front. Vox locked you tight so you couldn’t escape, the warm screen pressed into the back of your head.
“Goodnight Vox...”
Cursed with those beautiful thoughts Vox put in your head, your cheeks burned. The bittersweet pain in your heart gave you such contentment you were quickly pulled down past the point of no return. The gentle whir of Vox’s white noise banished the chaos of hell, pulling you into a world where only the two of you existed.
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zhalfirin-binds · 3 days ago
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Square antiprism box
Part I
(many thanks @queercus-books for finding out what that shape is called XD)
Over a year ago I saw this particular kind of box on the bookbinders fair in Leiden (NL). After having been recently reminded of them, I decided to give it a go and try to reverse engineer them from the pictures I found here (check out her other boxes, they are gorgeous!).
After staring at the original boxes for a bit, it was obvious they were not covered on the inside after gathering them. The pattern was visible in one consecutive pattern. It told me that a) the board was laminate with the patterned paper while still flat and b) the box was made from one piece, not single pieces glued together. For that the corners and edges needed to be scratched, but not cut through.
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What stumped me in the beginning was what angle to pick for the walls. Naturally the base of each triangle had to be as long as the sides of the squares it connected to, but a too pointy angle at the tip resulted in long boxes that looked rather twisted than having that bulbous look I was looking for.
The solution (after some more staring and a few more paper models) was 'right angles'! Any square piece of board can be made into this box by marking out the center square and have the walls point away in right angles.
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Next I cut away the parts that won't be needed (to make sure I don't cut one of the side walls off, I crossed them out). The net of polyhedrons for this box could look different than this and still give me this shape, but with the way the paper pattern is was not visibly interrupted I'm confident this is the net the Dutch bookbinder has used. (It also wastes the least material)
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Now it was scratching the other lines just enough so they would bend nicely, but not get too weak to hold the structure and test assemble. Shallow cuts and test bending every now and then helps to get there (also a metal ruler to keep carving the same line)
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Cutting the board half way through ended me up with those gaps though. I''m not sure how much they would show if I dressed them just like that, but I decided to not take the risk and reinforced them with a white paper just in case.
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The white paper is really just a white strip of paper long enough to go all around the box and a bit wider than one of the triangles is high so I could have an overlap and reinforcement to the bottom too. Part of why I did this was also to see if covering the body would work as I thought it would. With the angled planes the strip of paper bends up and and down, but in the end it's still one straight strip of paper.
I let it dry a bit before adding another layer, this time with the patterned paper and turn in's on top and bottom. In hindsight I could have cut the turn ins to the inside at an wider angle to avoid them reaching onto the better visible part, but then. this is the first time I made this box so I take that as a lesson learned.
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Now all it needs is a base and a lid and I'm done.
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havin-fun-imagining-twd · 3 days ago
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Onstage
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What - it's nothing to panic about, Lori's secret pregnancy, Shane's changes for the worse, Sophia gone for over a week, and now a barn full of walkers. It's fine. No big deal, nothing is wrong, so you're gonna step onstage and act like it. On the bright side, Daryl isn't stuck in a bed anymore!
When - the morning after Keep this dog asleep. (the night where Glenn discovers the barn in Season 2)
Who - this is part of the Slowpoke Series, which is a canon compliant slow burn Reader x Daryl. You're also Shane's younger sibling
Pronouns - she/her
TWs - a few cusses, panic, bad screenshots
References - lots, y'all, want the Masterlist?
Length - longer bc I've been awol, I've been dreading posting again, friends, so thank you much for reading. Kind feedback is always welcome :)
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“Goodness. You two slept together.”
“Wha—Carol!” you squeak, accidentally splashing some coffee on your hands while you’re at it, to which Carol apologizes, “Oops!”
Glenn and you fell asleep beside each other, by the fire pit. You two must have conked out while staring at the barn.
Brr, the sun hasn’t warmed the day yet, you’re like an ice-pop.
“Wh’appened?” Glenn mumbles, still half-asleep in Dale’s camp chair.
Carl, freshly freed from the house and now officially back to the tents, also wanted to know, “What was the joke?”
“Sorry, couldn’t resist,” Carol whispers in your ear and wipes the coffee off your hand with a tissue she had in her pocket.
That ship has sailed, Carol!
Lori smiles and shakes her head, and hands Glenn a coffee cup. “Carol was teasing them about having spent the night out here. Must’ve stayed up far too late having fun.”
“‘Fun,’” Glenn groans to himself, blindly nursing his coffee. You notice he winces and reaches for the back of his neck when he tries to bend it forward. Must’ve slept on it wrong.
“How late did you guys stay up?”
“I don’t even know, little man,” you answer Carl while reaching out for a hug. “But ‘far too late’ sure is correct.”
He returns your reach and hugs you back, tucking his head down across your neck like he used to when he was little. You press a kiss to his temple and hold him awhile longer, not wanting to let go first.
It’s good to have started the day on an up-note. You’re already on guard this morning. Less so about the genuine, bona-fide barn full of walkers on the property and moreso that Glenn won’t keep the secret long enough.
Which is backwards, but…the worry is that Shane will, um, and, and— oh God, and Carl can’t go near it! What are you gon—
“—Here, Maggie left these for you two.” Lori has returned and plunks down what resembles an Easter basket filled with peaches.
“Wait, should you be lifting heav—” Glenn cuts himself off, apparently having woken up a brain cell and remembering the pregnancy is still a secret.
You run onstage and speak up for Lori. “That’s how her arms stay so toned. Can you believe she hand-whipped the cream for the ambrosia?” Solid improv.
Lori seems to tamp down on whatever frustration she’s feeling. “It’s not heavy, Glenn.”
“Mom can lift so much, that puny basket of peaches is nothing,” Carl tells him, apparently thinking Glenn was being silly.
Rattled, it takes a moment before Lori recalls what she was talking about. “Maggie also gave us a bucket filled with tomatoes along with another big bowl of eggs. We have to find a way to thank them. They’ve done so much.” She sighs. “Even last night, we cooked the meal, but they provided the food. Meat, even. All we contributed food-wise was the field green salad and the two cans of creamed corn.”
You’ve got to keep it to yourself that by not revealing the Greene’s massive secret about a barn full of walkers, you’re certainly giving them some kind of fucked up recompense.
And like you said last night, there are worse things to be bribed with than food. In fact, you have no immediate plans to do anything other than sit here, miserably tired, in T-Dog’s camp chair and stress-eat peaches — and stick close to Glenn lest he get the urge to open Pandora’s box about that barn.
“Carl, Miss Patricia hopefully mentioned how the barn is unstable? They won’t even go near it, and we are forbidden.” You swipe a peach and have at it. The juice dribbles down your hand and chin. Carl smirks. You snort; at least he’s seen you look grosser. So, in a very ladylike fashion, you shove the rest of it in your mouth in one bite and immediately swipe another. “There’s some kind of vermin problem, too, and you don’t want none of them diseases rats and the like carry. Keep away.”
Mid-chew, you realize that you just lied flawlessly by slipping in truth. You’re not big on lying. In fact, you hate it. You don’t do it, or, at least you think you don’t? Do you?
This and the weight of last night’s inward decision that you made sits heavy in your stomach, making the peach sink like a rock.
You’re going to leave, with your brother. Shane can’t stay here, not when the news of the baby and now the barn gets out. You’ll even go to Fort Benning despite all your misgivings. Anything to keep things from imploding here when those secrets get out. Not, um, not that you’ll stay away forever from the group, just until, um…
Well, if looks are any indication, Glenn’s also busy being miserably tired and stressed. He was the one to discover the barn’s secret, first off. And he’s not good with secrets, and now has three to contend with. The pregnancy, Shane losing his temper and physically hurting you. And now, the stupid, stupid, awful barn.
“Did your head flop down when you fell asleep, Glenn?”
“It must’ve, it’s so stiff!” he mutters. “I can’t have a stiff neck when the…”
Smart, he knows not to finish the sentence and instead resumes warily eyeing the barn. You’re grateful your neck is fine and dandy, you’re in no fit state to mess up your neck or shoulder again. For real, by the grace of God, you’d fallen asleep nestled in T-Dog’s camp chair and your neck stayed blessedly straight and untwisted.
“We search for Sophia in groups, it’s all good,” you cover for him. Carl is still next to you, so the fewer questions, the better.
Maybe it’s the lack of sleep, but you’re restless. Seeking something to busy your hands with, you think to yourself you know what? Your friend could use a massage. It’s the gentlemanly thing to do, considering you slept together (lol).
Shoving the rest of the second peach in your mouth, you consider that slurping the juice off your hand may be a mite untoward, so instead you…wipe it on the clothes you wore all day yesterday and fell asleep in…such a feminine, classy woman. Didn’t even brush your teeth last night.
Whatever, a neck and shoulder rub is the least you can do for a friend you may not see again. “Glenn, I can do you a massage,” you offer.
“Wait. Really?”
“’Course.” Let’s face it, you may not see him again after you leave. Maybe no one here, just look at the track record of losing peop — oh my gosh, crybaby much? Get your butt back onstage and act fine.
“Can you, with your arm still wrapped like that?” he checks regarding your modified sling.
“Sure can.”
“Dude, that would be, like,” Glenn sighs, then you hear Lori call for Carl, who gets up and goes to his mother. “Thank you, that would be awesome, it hurts really bad,” your friend accepts.
“Eh, it’s the least I could do, considering last night we did,” pause for dramatic effect, “sleep together.”
“What the f—”
“—Bro, I know.," you drone. "That’s what Carol joked about a few minutes ago. Didn’t expect that joke outta her, right?”
“Slept together, now I get it,” he cracks up halfheartedly. But in an instant, his gaze gets drawn right back toward the barn and resettles into uneasy, blatant stare.
That rattles you. Suddenly, you become convinced he’s gonna spill the beans before the one week (at least one week!) trial. For a few moments, you feel breathless, as in you can’t inhale enough. That happened last night, too, you figured it was because of the cold air.
You cough, inhale extra deep. The sensation goes away. But now you’re starting to get mad. As you rise from the chair, you’re more than conscious of your inner kettle beginning to simmer. Not gonna lie, you sound snotty when you comment, “Glad to see they didn’t learn how to jump as high as a hayloft and find their way out yet.”
“Y/N.”
In lieu of any new comeback, you start on his neck. Immediately and likely without meaning to, he lets out a thankful groan. That warms you, and you remind yourself he’s worried for a good reason and that you love your friend.
And, strangely, then you think back to how you did this for Daryl, gave him a massage. How pleasant the closeness felt, how strange it made your stomach feel. How he’d silently cried but was vulnerable enough to ask you not to stop…
And with the jokes about you and Glenn, you’re feeling some unpleasantly conflicting emotions. Full disclosure, you’d had some hidden and very unwelcome hurt feelings when you found out about him and Maggie. Residual, you reckon, from when you’d two had a little fondness (lol Dale) for each other.
Really, you know it’s just that you’re lonely and things are stressful. Ugh, more than stressful.
“Wanna kick the ball around later with the others, see if the girls can’t beat y’all this time?” Together, Jimmy and he have been an unbeatable team so far, and you three girls want to change that.
“Anything to make the pharmacy trip suck less.”
You’d forgotten all about that. It’s supposed to feature none other than Glenn, Maggie, yourself, and maybe T-Dog. “That’s still on?”
Glenn shrugs. “I don’t remember. And I don’t want to go today, let’s do it tomorrow or Monday.”
“Fine by me. Naught dire we need yet.”
He unexpectedly exhales in pleasure when you must’ve hit a spot he needs worked out.“I haven’t gotten a massage since, like,” your friend sighs again, and he sounds weighed down when he continues. “Varsity baseball in high school. Appa was really good at shoulder rubs.”
“Oh.” A memory about his dad might will probably spark a whole lot of memories, and he’s still iffy about crying in front of people. “Want me to stop?”
“Heck no.”
“Are you cool with crying? Massages sometimes do that,” you hesitate.
“What do you mean?”
“I meant the act itself can make folk cry sometimes.” Especially if memories get brought up.
“Make ‘folk’ cry?” he teases. "You already used the word 'naught,' too, bumpkin."
You pause the massage to give him a very light shove. “Shut up.”
Breakfast is eggs again, you can smell them cooking. The Greenes have been very generous with eggs. And, of course, now extra-generous with the peaches and some tomatoes, apparently. Maybe the thrill of yellow squash or string beans is in the future, too.
Ooh, or dairy. Oh my gosh, or red meat! Jimmy mentioned they’ve made a ton of jerky what with all their cattle.
“G’morning,” you hear Shane behind you.
“Heya.”
“Morning, Shane.”
The razzing is clear in his tone of voice, but try telling that to Glenn as your brother says, “Lookin’ cute, you two. Didn’t know this was a thing now, I thought that ship had sailed.”
Yeahhhhh, Glenn wriggles away from your hands quicker than you can whine, “Shaney!” who simply cracks up, “Just teasing.”
“I’ll tease your face,” you wish you weren’t snickering back. “And you know my heart belongs to darling Theodore,” you add in an exaggerated accent.
T-Dog, unfortunately, hears, and utters a soft “Da hell?” aaand you cackle even harder. Surely he knows the not-so-secret secret that you think he’s a catch? Too old for you, but, like. What a gem.
“Glenn, my apologies.” Shane winks. “It’s too easy to rile this one up. And Dog, don’t worry.”
“It’s cool,” Glenn answers so awkwardly.
You scrunch your lips at your brother in an effort not to smile. He’s acting like himself again, the real Shane. You don’t feel as if you’re looking at a stranger, you don’t feel the urge to stay on-guard or stay onstage. “Proud of yourself?”
He shrugs with a lazy grin. “It is real easy to rile you up.”
“Mmhm, well I’m fixing to escape to Fort Benning right now, lemme just wash up first.” You insert this little seed in hope it takes root. He was planning to go there before things changed.
He was planning to go without your input or foreknowledge, too, but he was doing what he thought was best for the group. For Lori and Rick.
Until he didn’t anymore, according to what he said to Lori.
That night, the same day Daryl had almost died, was something else.
The things he said to Lori echo in your head, the confident flirting while she was visibly unreceptive and shaken.
Then you recall the way he’s been “pragmatic” and almost irritated about the continuing search for Sophia.
Then the way he blew up at you, hurt you.
And finally, how your first reaction to finding out there was a barn filled with walkers a mere one minute trek from where your people are sleeping in tents was to insist that the secret must be kept from Shane at all costs. That the secret had to stay that way because of what would happen if Shane found out.
Maybe it’s from sleeping too close to the campfire or because it was so chilly last night, but the breathing trouble is back. It's fine, this happened last night, it ended up being fine. You cough a few times to try and inhale more deeply and ease the tightness in your chest, but you feel strange and a little nauseous. Maybe you're coming down with something.
“Lemme take over here — aw, Glenn, hey, sit back on down,” Shane insists to your friend who just tried to escape. “Heard you slept on your neck wrong. That shit stinks, man. But,” he holds out his hands and wiggles his fingers. “I got so much practice with massages from this one’s migraines, I might should switch careers. C’mon then,” he says lightheartedly.
The unease you just wrestled with lessens. This is the real Shane, the confident, even cocky, but goodhearted one.
Ooo, your breathing feels a little better, too. Cool!
He looks at you and points with his thumb toward the house. “The uh, the little one, what’s the blonde girl’s name again?”
“Soph—oh! Um, sorry, y-you mean ‘Beth,’” you stammer, all the mirth from a moment ago zapped.
The look in your brother’s eyes changes from easygoing to dampened to cold.
He tries to sound nonchalant behind a thin veil of both defense and offense. “Yeah, the, uh, the teenager. She asked for you.”
“Okay. Thanks.” You’d be off like a shot if there wasn’t another potential time bomb to worry about.
Glenn.
To your friend, you assure in truth, “He does give a mighty solid massage.” But when you lean over enough for him to see your face, you can feel your eyes darken when you hold the finger to your lips and set your jaw.
And as you make toward the house with your coffee and another two peaches, you’re grappling with the fact that, in an effort to keep Glenn quiet so everything won’t blow to pieces, you’re behaving not unlike the very person that you’re trying to prevent from igniting the explosion in the first place.
Another worry is the way you so easily slipped in and out of being onstage.
You’ve always been one to insist on truth and honesty. It’s a badge of honor you wear with pride, and even Daryl, prickly grump Daryl, has mentioned it and appreciates that about you.
And yet, look at your conduct over the past week or so. You can certainly lie, and be believable at it. You don’t like that.
Oh, gross, you’re getting nauseous again.
As you near the porch, Beth’s soft, clear voice calls your name, and she exits the house to meet you. “I got somethin’ for you. Can you come upstairs?”
“Sure. Your dress is cute!” comes out automatically. You’re still dazed and stressed. Her sundress really is pretty, though. Briefly, you consider how it would be nice to feel feminine again.
She leads you up the stairs, and it strikes you how odd it is that you have to go upstairs for whatever she’s going to give you, right? Then, you worry that it’s to do with the barn.
And you’re right.
Or, at least, you think you are. Maggie is upstairs when Beth brings you there.
The tightness comes back, so you focus on your breathing and will your stomach to chill out. You're onstage, you need to perform.
“Y/N, hi!” Margaret says this a little overly chipper, even though her appearance suggests that she’s had about as much shut-eye as you, if not less. “Sleep okay?”
“A-About as well as you, I reckon,” you answer with a hint of humor and only a trace of a stress stutter. Buying time with a few more coughs, before you get too defensive, you play it off as if Beth does not know that you and Glenn know. “We stayed up far too late and ate way too many peaches,” you say the girl. Which is the truth, you aren’t lying! You aren't lyi — nope, don't you cry! Stay onstage, stay onstage, stay onstage—
—As it so happens, now is when you recall how you are currently carrying two peaches in your hand, so your cheeks heat. The urge to cry goes away, so small win. “I ate way too many, at least.”
Beth giggles. “I love peaches, too. I had peach cobbler as my birthday cake two years ago. The ones we grow are so good!”
“Thank you for the basket of food, by the way, it was very kind.” Very kind bribery, please keep it up, we haven’t had this much available food in months, in fact, we’ll probably do anything you ask us if you let us stay here!
“There’s plenty more where the peaches came from. The season’s almost over, but we still have bushels left to pick, the hens haven’t slowed production yet, and we’re almost out of canning supplies we’ve done so many,” Maggie responds.
Beth is opening a big trash bag on her bed that looks like it’s filled with blankets, so Maggie takes the opportunity to lock eyes with you again. She mouths, “Thank you.”
For not saying anything? “She doesn’t know we know?” you mouth back.
She shakes her head.
You relax muscles you didn’t know you were tensing.
“Yay, I got it open without rippin' it!” Beth exclaims. “Y/N, Maggie and I had gathered up a bunch of clothes for charity, but that’s when things got, w-well,” she halts, unsure of how to describe the outbreaks. “The bad things happened, but, um, we, well, we still had all the donations bagged. Daddy and Shawn also…” She quiets at mentioning her deceased older brother and turns weepy.
Her big sister finishes for her. “Shawn donated clothes, too. And Mom.” She swallows. “There’s plenty to share with your group, is what she means.” Maggie nods her head at the bag on the bed, then to two others on the floor.
They're sharing...all of those?
You don’t get a chance to ask it because Beth is already answering. “When I saw how y’all looked, it was scary. The,” she starts, then stops. “Not that you were scary, I meant y’all must’ve been out there a long time. It’s scary to think about.”
“In your defense, I did look scary the first time you saw me.” Wild hair, sweat-drenched, sobbing, and covered in Carl’s and your own blood. Rough day.
But having been ‘out there,’ as Beth worded it, it’s not so scary when you’re with a group you trust. It even feels comforting to have them all. Which is when you consider how Shane and you will be back out there in a couple weeks, alone.
“Here.” Beth shyly points to the bag. “I wanted to offer for you to look through the bags first. If, if you want.”
The offer is (more) bribery to keep you quiet, which cools the warmth of the charity, but doesn't lessen the grateful tears you spill. Plus, yes, you all could use some fresh clothes, there’s only so much mending that can be done. And to be offered first dibs, even if it’s just to butter you up, is still being offered first dibs. “I’d love to take a look, thank you,” you say in earnest.
Beth combs through the bag and chats in her shy manner, handing you a barely-worn, calf-length dress that had been gift for Maggie, then a (pure wool?!) cardigan their mother had been giving away.
You find it hard to believe that she’s doing this as bribery, Beth doesn’t seem the sort to easily conceal things. She’s got an innocence that hits as genuine.
But, then again, you who hate dishonesty are apparently great at it. Who’s to say she’s not, too?
The breathlessness briefly comes back. You clear your throat and cough once.
Beth next, to your apprehension and then delight, has you try on the dress and cardigan (which shockingly fit). While retying the modified sling around your upper arm, Maggie keeps trying to catch your eye again in order to, you don’t know, communicate something via meaningful glance? But you don’t have the bandwidth for it, so return her look with a polite smile and shrug.
Her little sister then proceeds to gussy you up in a way reminiscent of how Amy did once at the quarry camp to see how Glenn would react. Gosh, was that only two-ish months ago, wasn’t it? Or has it been longer? It feels like so much more time has passed.
Beth has manages a quick, respectable braided style for your hair, touches up your eyebrows for you, and even adds blush. She then claims that your hiking boots “look okay” with the ensemble and has you use the full length mirror in her closet to inspect the full results.
The dress is lovely, you have to admit. The neckline doesn’t dip too low bonus that it doesn’t show your bruise, the waist is defined, and it’s long enough past your knees to be comfortable. The length also helps lessen the lingering apprehension you have about showing natural (*cough cough unshaven*) legs.
You actually feel…pretty. Been a while.
It’s as if she knew you were yearning to feel girly again. If this is bribery, you welcome it. Worse ways of being bribed than with fresh food and a makeover from a genuinely sweet kid. And hey, since you have to be onstage so much, might as well dress nicely for the audience.
When you’re walking downstairs to bring your people the donations, Maggie murmurs in your ear, “Y/N, I didn’t put her up to any of this, it was all her.”
When you pull away from her, she whispers insistently, “It wasn’t her bein’ nice to keep you quiet. Remember, she doesn’t kn—”
“—Good mornin’, girls. What’s in the bags?” Patricia’s voice calls from the bottom of the stairwell.
“We had some clothes to donate since before Easter,” Beth answers. “I figured they could use ’em.”
“They certainly could. I’m glad I have plenty I brought from my house when we moved in.” You can see Miss Patricia in the hallway by the stairs, clearly wearing one of her late husband’s shirts over her dress. Her brows lift. “Seems you dolled your friend up some. You clean up nice, sweetpea!”
“Thank you, ma’am. I-I do feel like a lady again,” you allow, your cheeks again warming.
“Never stopped being one, as far as I’m concerned. Always kept your Ps and Qs,” she’s kind enough to maintain. “Oh, speaking of ladies, I don’t know how y’all are doing on girls’ supplies, but we should have enough to share while you’re still with us.”
“Margaret and I were gonna look for some more on the next drug store run tomorrow or Monday to make sure you’ll well stocked.” Along with everything else on the list(s) that was forgotten when those two…got distracted.
Ugh, how different things would be if you’d gone along for that trip! None of this barn bullshit!
Again, you feel the need to cough to help you breathe better, so you cough twice and try clearing your throat.
“Uh-oh, sounds like cold and flu season is well on it’s way,” she muses. “Don’t let me keep you holding them bags all day, girls. It’ll be funny watchin’ your daddy react if one of them ends up dressed in his giveaways,” the woman comments wryly. “Now, I did intend to check on those stitches today, Y/N, so come see me later. Hersh is just finishing up with Daryl’s, in fact, then he’ll be all set to go, if you were wantin’ to see him out.”
Oh, right! Today is finally the day he’s leaving that room!
Carl, too, but he’s already out and has been wandering around outside as much as his energy and mom will allow (which isn’t very much yet).
Daryl, on the other hand, has been too dizzy and too ashamed to do much more than a trip around the perimeter of the house.
Carol and you cleaned his tent yesterday as a surprise. It was her idea, of course. She enlisted your help specifically because you twice mentioned not thinking his sweat smelled bad, which is weird, but, for real, it doesn’t smell bad to you. The cigarettes, on the other hand, ew.
“Are we not going today?” Maggie asks quietly about the postponed pharmacy trip.
With tact, you suggest, “We could all use some rest after stayin’ up so late.”
She peers into your eyes, then nods and adjusts her hold on the two bags in her hands.“That’s a good idea. I’m not up to it, either.”
Upon stepping back outside onto the front porch, Jimmy and Glenn are kicking the soccer ball around already. Glenn is keeping his neck taut as he and Jimmy go back and forth, but the pain must have lessened.
The irresistible urge you have to make light of everything seizes you, and you leap into matchmaker mode because, why not? You won’t be here much longer, and maybe Maggie and Glenn linking up will lead to the rest being permitted to stay. That’s what matters.
Oh, and, uh, because you love Glenn, and Maggie is kind…oh fuck, are you just a calculating, cold strategist?
The feeling that you’re running out of air and going to vomit returns, but you push yourself onstage and commit to the role. You have to keep your shit together.
“Ain’t he handsome when he plays? Good sportsmanship and confidence rolled into one.” You playfully hold a smile back when you glance at Maggie and giggle to hide your heavy breathing. “Also the shiny hair.”
“He does have great hair,” she softly agrees.
“Y/N, do you and Glenn like each other? I-I thought…” Beth’s face has paled.
Maybe that’s why you over-act when you exclaim, “Of course I like him, that’s why I’m such a great wingwoman for him.”
Margaret blushes. “Let’s get these bags to their camp.”
------------------------------
Him
------------------------------
“I can’t hunt?”
“You can do as you please,” the old man remarks. What, is he making fun of him? “But doing so while recovering from a concussion would be foolish, as would be heavy lifting or other strenuous activity, and that’s not considering your collarbone and ribs. I’m curious as to how you’d wield your weapon or bring back what you hunted, for one, if you would even make it off the property without keeling over.”
Daryl bites his tongue and keeps his words to himself. Well, fine! I can still bring that little girl back. She’s got legs, she’ll be able to walk on her own.
Hershel cleans up his stuff and stands. “Now, then, I’m sure you’re ready to finally see yourself out.”
“Damn straight,” is probably not the smartest response in front of the old man, what with the cuss word, but damn straight he is ready to get the hell out of there. Still, he remembers his manners. “Thanks for everythin’.” He even holds out his hand for a shake. Which is dumb because the guy’s hands are full.
Daryl…puts his hand back down and grabs the few things he had in there with him. Y/N once described the Dr. Farmer as ‘unreadable.’ Definitely is that.
Unreadable, Hershel drawls, “It’s good you’re on the mend,” and inclines his head toward the door. “After you.”
------------------------------
You
------------------------------
Dude, you had a panic attack.
It wasn’t too too bad, all things considered. Initially, you’d thought it was a mild asthma attack, but in hindsight, wow you were oblivious to all of the signs.
It started to happen when some of the group was going through the clothes, right after Maggie and you dropped them off and she left to do choring.
Lori was beside you, low-key beside herself trying to figure out how your people could “ever repay the family now?”
Next, T-Dog joked about the sizes being too small for him. “Ain’t sure what here I could fit that won’t result in a show for y’all.”
This is when Andrea murmured to Carol, “Reminds me how it’s been awhile.” The way Carol reacted clued you in that it might have been a sex joke. Especially given the way Andy next gave your brother a once-over as if you weren’t right there. You vividly recall licking your teeth and rolling your eyes.
Then Shane — and he did this without having seen Andrea do the once-over — nudged T-Dog in the ribs and began to unbutton his own top. “Worse things than a show these days, friend. And that there clean shirt is calling my name.” Naturally, he proceeded to swap garments right where he stood.
Per usual, Lori was more graceful than you. She ignored it as if he were her own brother acting like a frat boy, and merely continued to sift through one of the bags. She smiled upon finding something, tapped Carol on the shoulder, and handed it to her.
It’s been a week now since Shane betrayal to her and Rick. Even you’re still figuring out how to see him. The hopeful part is that he’s been leaving Lori alone. If his sights have indeed turned to Andrea, all the better.
Back to the moment, then you imagined what if he and Andrea got a little too close, did something foolish, and she ended up pregnant, too. Not that Lori’s baby is Shane’s, the baby is Rick’s regardless, but...
The tight feeling returned in your chest.
It was in the midst of this that Dale complimented you. “Kiddo, you’re all gussied up! Any occasion?”
“Mmhm, all dressed up for the ‘show.’” The nausea was back, plus a fun new notion of being observed by unseen persons.
Dale just nodded with raised brows, and you and he shared a look. Instead of tempering your fears, it piqued them. It wasn’t his fault, but Mr. Horvath’s expression started to mirror the way he stared into your eyes after catching Shane lose his temper and leave you with a bruise on your sternum.
The fears within you, the stress, the dread, all started roiling stronger and stronger. You cleared your throat, then coughed, but it didn’t help and you felt restless and, oddly, cornered.
And so, not knowing where to look therefore looking in all directions, you happened to spy Glenn staring at the barn. Again.
The air felt too…thin? And then you noticed Lori examining the torso of one of the shirts in the bag as if testing it for stretchiness or room. You could see the shadows clouding her face right before she abruptly put the shirt down. Then, there was Carol, holding up something that had clearly must have been Beth’s a few years ago, and it looked as if it would fit Sophia perfectly now.
It was just about then that your lungs simply couldn’t keep up.
“Kiddo?” sounded in your ear.
You may have panted something to do with “puffer,” referring to your largely unused inhaler. At any rate, instead of next going to the logical location of the RV to find the med bag, you made for the treeline. You didn’t want anyone near you, didn’t want anybody to see you, didn’t want a fuss, didn’t want to be touched, didn’t want anyone to even think about you, so you had to hide.
Panting, a numbness started to affect your fingers and spread to your torso and toes. You repeatedly coughed in an effort to break up whatever was making it hard to breathe. Once you started coughing, it dominoed. Your stitches were tugging at the forceful coughs, and soon, you were hacking. The hacking led to retching, one, two, three times. Tears started to fall.
“Baby, here,” came from your right and a warm, delicate hand touched the small of your back. Lori. She pressed the inhaler into your hand. “I shook it up, it’s all ready.”
Bending forward slightly to open your airways, you tried to exhale enough so you could take the dose properly as you clasped the trigger.
One puff. Hold breath in.
Your pulse thudded in your ears.
Another puff. Hold breath in.
The relief that usually comes with the medication wasn’t as apparent as it normally would be. It helped somewhat, but. You tried another dose.
More tears of frustration. You panted that you thought your were going to pass out. "F-Feels like m'gonna die," you may have also said. The phantom sensation of your hand being covered in Amy's blood returned. You recall wiping it with the hem of your dress, and Lori taking your hands, preventing you from continuing to do so.
Lori calmly instructed you to, “Try this with me, honey,” and slowly breathed in through her nose. You copied as best you could.
She then slowly breathed out through her mouth. You copied as best you could.
Over and over she coached you.
Things started to ease. Your pulse was still loudly thumping, but two doses of a corticosteroid will do that. In your escape, you’d made for the big rocks where you’d shared (sort of) a cigarette with Daryl. The stones felt nice and cool, and Lori’s gentle rubbing of her hand across your back was comforting.
“Been a while since you’ve needed the inhaler. ‘Decorative,’ you called it once,” she softly chatted. The sensation of not getting enough air wasn’t quite gone just then, but you felt pretty normal again.
“I reckon the cold and the smoke must’ve done me in,” you mumbled. Your throat was mildly sore after all the coughing. “It’s good it was mild.”
“Were you wheezing?”
“No, I…just couldn’t breathe enough or something.” You shrugged. “I don’t always wheeze when I need it.” Your nose was stuffy from crying.
She was thoughtful for a moment, and had begun to lightly scratch your back. “You and Glenn seem off this morning. I’ve seen you two tired before, but today you both seem…there’s something else going on, clearly. Did you two fight?”
“Not exactly.” It’s true. “We’re on the same page.” You weren't prepared to have to go onstage again, but just in case, you tried pulling yourself together.
“Was it about Maggie?”
You laughed genuinely. “Ha, not at all.”
Lori didn’t mirror your laughter or even smile in return. “Honey, I think you had a panic attack.”
At first, you protested. “Oh, it wasn’t that dramatic.”
“It looked different from where I was. But even still, it didn’t have to be or feel ‘dramatic’ to have been one, you know that.” The nonjudgemental straightforwardness in her voice, in her eyes, was enough to convince you that she could see straight into your heart and read what was there. “Y/N, is there something more going on?”
More than anything, at that moment, you didn’t want to lie to her.
But what could you do? Tell the truth, yes, 'the truth will out,' you know that. But you were convinced that telling the whole truth, right then, would be like lighting dynamite.
In your view, you would be exposing everyone to chaos and even violence, and you'd all seen too much of that already. And no, you couldn’t just tell one person because it never just stays with one person. Lori was/is not in any position to have more fear on her plate.
So what did you do?
You crawled back on that stage and you lied — by telling the truth.
“I’m worried he’ll talk.” Vague and a lie of omission, and maybe a little throwing your friend under the bus, but Lord have mercy on you, it was truthful.
Lori squeezed her eyes shut. “Me, too. Oh honey, I’m so scared!” she whispered, covering her mouth.
So scared of Shane, just like you are. “Rick won’t hold any of it against you. We all thought he was dead.”
She shook her head and stared at the ground.“But you saw how Shane behaved, you, you heard the things he said, Y/N,” she nearly hissed. “I don’t know who that man was, but it wasn’t Shane, just like when he had m—” then Lori cut off.
“When he had what?”
She shook her head again. “Seems Dale’s on his way over. He told me about what was going on so I could bring your medicine to you. He hadn't known what 'puffer' meant." And —oh, Y/N, I’m so sorry that you’re worrying yourself like this over my mistake! It's not fair to you.”
“Your kid ain’t a mistake, it’s so good that they’re here,” you replied in total honesty. First time all day.
Maybe she’ll be honest with you and spill whatever Shane did that she’s not being upfront about. Whatever it is could surely have been described in a sentence. “What else did Shane do, Lore?” It can’t have been that bad, or could it?
All she did was shake her head once more. “Like you said, he hasn’t been himself.
‘Hasn’t been himself.’ Fine. You’ve got secrets, too, so there’s no way on earth can you cast stones.
You stepped back onstage for hopefully the final time, and made yourself deliver the next lines. “That’s why we’re goin’ to Fort Benning.” Without you all. “Just him and me. Within two weeks, I hope?” The nausea still hadn’t gone away, and simply saying this brought it back.
Her brows sunk caution. “When was this decision made? I-I thought—”
“—I ain’t told him about it yet.” The bitter smile, you hadn’t been able to stifle. “Shouldn’t be hard to convince him, considering he was fixing to not so long ago.”
Lori’s apologetic tone wasn’t a put-on. “I’m so sorry he didn’t tell you. I had no idea you were left in the dark.”
That’s when some tightness came back to your chest, and your breathing turned faster again. “I know, Lore.”
She noticed. “Honey, hey,” she soothed, “breathe slowly, deeply." Her hand cupped your cheek. "His mistakes, his choices, his reactions are not your responsibility.”
“I know, b-but—”
“—And you don’t have to leave with him if you don't want to.”
“But wh—”
“—No buts.” Lori cupped your cheek, stood, and swiftly made toward Dale.
And here is where you hadn’t known she was going to be quite so straightforward with him.
In fact, you’d hoped she’d join you onstage and lie, too, but she behaved beyond reproach. “It was a panic attack, so please make sure to respect her privacy about it. I’ve got to check on the laundry.”
------------------------------
Him
------------------------------
Funny thing, he’s wearing the same clothes he had his accident in. He’s in the same stuff leaving that he had been when he got carried in there, except now they’re cleaned and mended.
It’s been good to be back outside, he prefers it. He can’t wrap his head around why some people can keep inside in front of a TV all day. You don’t get to hear or feel the wind indoors, can’t hear the birds and all that.
Now, he couldn’t say for sure, but stepping outside and knowing he didn’t have to go back in must feel at least half as good as getting freed from prison.
If prison was a nice-ass farmhouse without the risk of getting shanked or worse, obviously.
Merle would have some words if he heard Daryl say something like that out loud. Though, Merle was pretty settled when he was in lock-up. Fared fine.
His first view when he steps out into freedom is of Glenn and the teenage boy, kicking the ball around. Those two are straight into it and pay him no mind as he walks around them.
The rest of the group is around the picnic table, looks like they’re sorting laundry (?), therefore ain’t paying him no mind, either.
Phew.
This is good. He was wondering if Y/N was gonna parade him out or make it a big deal, but after hearing her and the other ladies talking in the hallway, she didn’t come back in. Works for him, he doesn’t like a crowd.
…But, like, where is she? He figured she’d be around, is all, but she ain’t by the table.
Ah, yeah, duh — she's probably still doing something with the girl that's about her age and her little sister. Still seems off Y/N and Glenn are only “five or six years younger” than him, but that’s what Y/N has said a few times.
The next thing he sees is Lori, who is swooping down the yard and toward the big rocks where he and T-Dog took a smoke break once. And where Y/N had her first try of a cigarette, too. Lori looks like a woman on a mission, damn. Dale is staring in the direction Lori is walking, those big-ass brows of his slanted downward. Wonder what that's about?
Over the sound of a few leftover end-of-season cicadas, he hears the normal drone of crickets, light talking from the group, the thunk of the ball getting kicked, a very loud crow, some cows mooing, somebody coughing, birds doing their thing, chickens clucking, the wind blowing. Mmm, good stuff. Being inside and hearing it just don’t sound as good as being right out in it.
Then, “Daryl!” comes from his left, and he sees Carol walking to him. She’s a good woman.
And now the memory of her kissing him on the cheek is making his cheeks heat up as quick as her steps toward him.
“I’ll carry those for you,” she quietly insists about his small pile of clothes. He lets her.
She’s been very, um, very attentive. Been having most of her meals with him, babying him as much as he’d allow, and all-in-all has been treating him extra after he had his accident.
There are more coughing sounds that he almost pegs as being Y/N’s, but when he looks back in the direction of the noise, there’s no one, just Lori off on her walk, and it wasn’t her doing the coughing.
“We moved your tent closer to the rest of us, so you would be closer to where we could help you.”
Closer. Great. Daryl wanted nothing less, but a kind gesture is a kind gesture, so he mans up and acts proper, grunting, “Thank you.” It’s not like they went and messed with his stuff, they just moved the tent, and for a real kind reason.
Glenn rears and kicks, sending the ball soaring. Damn, he's good.
“Now, it may smell and look a little different, but all of your things are still there.”
“Huh?” What’d she mean?
“You deserved a nice, clean place to go back to,” Carol explains. “Y?N and I cleaned up your tent.”
...
…they what?
He gets the weirdest image of himself as being onstage and forgetting whatever it was he was supposed to say next, leaving him standing there like a mouthbreather in front of the audience. And he kinda wants to cuss the audience out.
His first idea after learning Carol and Y/N was: What the hell, y’all been messing with my stuff? What gives y'all the right?
But, come on, even he had it in him to keep his mouth shut. They’d taken the time and effort to clean up his shit and it was probably as nice as when Carol had worked her magic in the RV. That's damned decent, in fact.
So, Daryl does not act like a jackass, and instead, remembers his lines and thanks Carol again.
“It was no trouble. How about I bring you some more breakfast once you’re settled in?” she quickly offers. See? Very attentive. And he didn’t do shit to have earned it, which made it more uncomfortable.
Aw shit, his cheeks feel all warm again. First around Y/N, now Carol? Maybe there is something to this whole concussion bullshit.
Or, maybe Carol done kissed you on the cheek and said you were a good man and that you did right by her little girl as much as a father should and that’s the best possible thing somebody could be told.
“Do you want some more coffee, too?”
I wanna to be left alone, lady. “Nah, m’great. Thank you.”
------------------------------
You
------------------------------
“Last night seemed to be an indication summer was officially over. But today,” Dale blows through his lips, “Well, we can already tell it’ll be a warm one.”
“Did we hit the first day of fall, yet? I forgot what date it is today.”
“No, that’s on the 21st. We’ve got some time.”
“Oh, wait!” you squeak (ouch, your throat is still sore from coughing). “Ain’t it the Holy Days for you still?” Rosh Hoshanah was sometime last week, but that one got sort of messed up because of everything that’s been going on.
Oh man, it was the day after Daryl got into his accident, wasn’t it?
Dale’s cordial expression falters. “Yes, it was last week.”
“Yom Kippur is soon then, right?”
“It’s on the 18th this year, yes. Two days away.”
There’s this very insistent raven that’s been cawing away. Or is that a crow? You can’t tell the difference. You can tell that you’ve bummed Dale out, however. “I’ve bummed you out.”
Smiling sadly, he concedes, “Jewish holidays are usually lonely ones in mixed company. And now, especially with it being the holiest time of the year, after everything…” He lifts his shoulders.
“I’ll do the fasting with you so you won’t be alone!” Ow, stop raising your voice so high. “Is it no food or drink at all on that day, or is water okay?”
A happier smile. “No food or drink — barring serious health concerns, of course, in which case, one is required to not fast.”
“No water must suck! When my lot do fasting, water don’t count.”
He nods his head once. “It’s all part of the atonement. It’s considered a blessing for us to fast for it.”
“And the feast after it is fun,” you sigh with a grin. You’ll enlist Carol and Lori to see about making him a yummy fast-breaking meal for the day.
This is what you needed. Dale didn’t press you regarding the panic attack, and has simply been keeping you company by the big rocks. You’ve haven’t had to go back onstage while he’s been sitting with you. You’d probably be content to stay here a good, long time if you didn’t have to use the toilet something major.
“Did you see if there was a pair of suspenders in the bags so you and Mr. Greene can match?”
“Is this your way of saying you’re feeling well enough to head back, or that you need privacy?”
“It’s my way of sayin’ I gotta go potty real bad.” You stand. “Suspenders are pretty cool, you can party like it’s 1899.”
“I actually quite like how suspenders look,” he chuckles, stretching and getting to his feet.
“Mm, they remind me of the Old West, I love ’em.”
Dale and you walk back until reaching the side of the farmhouse, whereupon you excuse yourself to head to the treeline and do your business.
------------------------------
Him
------------------------------
As soon as the heat starts to sink in, he unbuttons his shirt halfway and kicks his shoes off. Getting the socks off without hurting himself takes some effort, but it’s worth it. His stuff is so squeaky clean and fresh, he wants to avoid sweating the place up too quick.
His old pillowcase is gone, probably scrapped for dishrags seeing as it was pretty worn. In its place is a flower-covered one with soft, thick cotton fabric. There's some phrase about a 'woman's touch' that must apply here. Or, if Merle were here, prime Darylina ammo. Joke's on him, the pillowcase is soft as hell.
And being in there might seem boring, but it's 10 times better than being stuck in a damn bed and listening to music for days on end. Just cloud-watching through his tent window is fun enough for him.
In fact, it’s rad! He’s so psyched to not be in that room anymore!
Cloud watching, playing with his bolts, farting if he's gotta; he's content as can be. Seriously, he’s in such a good mood right now.
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But as luck would have it, by the time he’s decided to see how easily a bolt can poke a hole through the mesh window (the answer is very easily, and it’s real satisfying) none other than Andrea herself appears at his tent door. The chick who shot him.
Now, she’s pretty as a picture and then some, but he doesn’t want his belly showing in front of her. If he’d been paying attention and heard her making her way to him, he would’ve buttoned up.
So, he tries out the same tactic as last night, when Carol walked in on him shirtless; maybe by not closing his shirt, she wouldn’t think about it? Or…fuck it, just about everybody has seen some part of him uncovered in the past week. At least there ain’t no scars on this side.
All he’s got to do is make like he’s onstage and that it doesn’t bother him having his literal nipples on display.
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“Hey.” Andrea steps into his tent, looking like she is about to eat crow.
She hands him a book. He accepts the maybe peace-offering.
“It’s not that great, but…” she trails off, breathes out, and looks guilty as hell.
Y/N, Carol, and T-Dog all mentioned she’s been kicking her own ass for shooting him. Granted, he’s still a little pissed, and, yeah, real thankful that she’s a shit shot, but — she was trying to protect the group, right? Ain’t even her fault he got stuck in that damn bed. The concussion, split side, and broken ribs did that for him.
He figures he’s gotta make it clear that she’s off the hook without making her feel worse for being let off the hook. And, he thinks he knows just the way to break the tension. It’d got the librarian at his high school to laugh the first time he made the remark, which is probably why he was usually allowed to eat in there during lunch.
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Now, he knows reading is still on the no-go list, don’t worry, Y/N, but he casually holds the book up and flips through the pages.
He’s gotta, it’s the setup.
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It’s good that Andrea ain’t said nothing yet, because it’s the perfect opportunity for him to pretend to be dead-serious when he complains, “What, no pictures?”
The joke does the trick. Andrea smiles and relaxes. “I’m so sorry. I feel like shit,” she starts to go on, but he puts a stop to it.
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Tucking the book aside as he settles down onto the pillow, he cuts in, “You and me both.”
“I don’t expect you to forgive me, but, if there’s anything I can do, I—”
He cuts in one more time, “—You were trying to protect the group. We’re good.” He means it.
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But, ya know, just because things are chill doesn’t mean he can’t bust her balls a little, right? “But hey,” he stops her as she’s leaving. “Shoot me again, you best pray I’m dead.”
------------------------------
You
------------------------------
“It went great! Better than I ever expected.” Andrea takes a seat beside you on the log. Judging by the look of serenity on her face, it appears that the monkey she’s had on her back for the past week is finally gone.
“Good, m’glad.” You knew it would be fine, but Andrea was so nervous.
“And I have to say, I can see the appeal now.”
“What appeal?”
“Daryl was,” she thinks on the right word and picks: “Charming.”
Ah. You see what she’s trying to do. “Well, go tell him that, then,” you suggest, cool as a cucumber. She and Dale thought you and he had a romantic thing going on. Lol, nah.
“And he was funny!” she goes on.
You sip your tea. “Mm, he can be.”
“Not angry, or, or nasty.” She closes her eyes and breathes out a sigh of relief. “I was so worried about how it was going be.”
You tilt your head in partial agreement. He can be a dick.
Your job for the rest of the day, so Papa Dale done told you, is to be chill (yes, he used the word ‘chill’ and it was adorable). It’s your only responsibility today, seeing as he joined you when you went to check the highway spot for Sophia. She hasn’t found it, it’s untouched. Again.
So now, your job = keep chill.
“Are you helping with target practice later?”
Oh, right, and there’s that. You suppose you could continue helping Beth with drawing her weapon smoothly, keep drilling her never, ever forget to switch the safety back and forth.
But…maybe today, that isn’t your job. Maybe you need a rest from being onstage. “I think I’m gonna sit today out.”
“Is everything okay?”
“I just need a day,” you answer in too high a pitch.
Andy doesn’t inquire further. “How’s the little fuzzball?” she instead asks.
“Still sleeping,” you coo. The sluggish little chick you’d scooped up while quickly sprinkling feed-corn in order to feel useful is your insurance for keeping chill. Can’t not keep chill with a chick asleep in your lap.
“It must feel nice and safe wrapped up like that.”
“Mm.” The chick is nestled in a dishtowel, half its body also covered by your new cardigan.
“Y/N, have you not gone to visit him yet?”
“Not yet. He’d appreciate some time to himself, I reckon, after a week bein’ stuck in there and visitors and checkups at all hours.”
Glenn’s off doing farm chores with Jimmy, so he’s being kept busy and won’t be a concern. As for you, you’ve got your sleepy chick and are content to stay here on the log. You ate lunch, yet another peach (you’re up to six), just finished the leftover raspberries, and are now washing it all down with some fresh mint tea you made in honor of one of your best friends. She’d make her own mint tea and would call it ‘wild mint’ tea because it sounded exotic.
When Dale mentioned today’s date, you realized it was her birthday. She was the most confident girl you’d ever met, and a sweetheart to boot. You really hope she’s alive.
Andrea chuckles to herself. “I gave him that terrible book to keep him occupied.”
Book?? “A book?”
“I brought him The Case of the Missing Man,” she shares with a grin. “He can join the survivor’s club of those who’ve read it — Y/N, is something wrong?”
“Oh, um, nah, it’s all good, uh,” you are fumbling so hard right now. Cool, you’re feeling lightheaded again, cool cool.
It’s all cool. There’s no fire. Stay chill. “I’m gonna pop over and make sure he ain’t cracked into it yet, he’s, it’s, it’s not safe yet. C-Concussion and all.” Listen to you, smooth like butter.
“Oh shit.”
“Andy, don’t sweat. Even if he did start on it, like,” and you pause, because, “I don’t actually know what can go wrong, I didn’t ask Miss Patricia, but I’m sure it ain’t nothing serious!” You cup the (awoken and now loudly peeping) chick between your hands as you book it (pun intended?) to Daryl’s tent.
------------------------------
Him
------------------------------
For Y/N to glide over wearing a pretty dress, hair all fancy, and holding some little bird was not something he put on his bingo sheet.
“Hiya, Daryl.”
It takes him a second. “Hey.” Never seen her in a dress, is all. And with that little bird, he gets the image in his head of her bursting into song and the farm animals and forest critters doing a musical number with her.
He’ll *ahem* keep that to himself...
“I hope you’re enjoyin’ your new freedom! Mi—”
“—Who’s the little guy?” he had to ask first.
“It's a chick.”
Clearly. “Why?”
“It’s cute.”
She ain’t wrong. “…Can I see?”
“Yeah, it's adorable!”
He begins to get up, but she steps over faster than he can stand. She kneels beside his cot and, delicately, transfers the wrapped chick into his hands. He carefully unwraps the washcloth around it and slips his hand underneath it so sits on his palm with its teeny legs dangling through his fingers. It’s peeping like it’s getting paid for it, holy shit it’s so fucking cute.
“I came here wonderin’ if I might I borrow the, uh, the book Andrea just lent you?”
Ha, called it! The second Y/N found out he had contraband, she came to the rescue.
The chick quiets down, appearing to relax in his hand.
Maybe it’s because he’s in a good mood, but he smiles like a dipshit for a few moments before saying anything. “Nah, I wouldn’t dream of checking it out ’til you said it was fine.”
“Oh ha-ha,” she play-mocks, assuming he wasn’t being serious.
Eh, okay, maybe he was sorta razzing her, too. But he wants to come out on the other side of this whole concussion bullshit on the up, and if reading is still off-limits, it’s still off limits. He’s not gonna full-on disregard somebody who gives a shit.
“How’d ya end up dressed like that?” is his second question while he pets the chick lightly along its head with the feathers on his bolt.
“I wear this, like, all the time.”
“Oh right, yeah, you do,” he sarcastically responds. He tries to reach with his left arm to pick up the book under his cot, but gets a sharp twinge and surrenders that he can’t do that move yet.
Y/N snorts at the sarcasm and tells him straight, “The Greenes had some giveaways, so Beth gave me this outfit. Oh, thank you,” she says when he instead points in the direction of the book. She picks it up and hugs it to herself. “I do believe Carol put a few things aside for you to try on, too.”
“’Kay.”
Y/N looks pretty.
It’s nothing new, obviously her face is nice, but it's the whole blushing things that's annoying. Seems he's started blushing like a belle over all the damn women in camp these days. That really was some smack to the head he got.
He’s imagining himself as being back onstage again, forgetting his lines. He can ad-lib. “How you gonna search in that?”
“Ain’t like my ankles are tied together. Women have always been able to move, play, do manual labor of all sorts in dresses, corsets, stays, stockin’s, you name it,” she serves back with just enough fire that his belly did one of those good flippy-floppys. “That reminds me, Nervous Nelly came back! Did any of us tell you? She’s fine as can be, I fed her half a peach yesterday!”
Some of them baby hairs around her face are coming out of the braids. Her skin's got a sheen to it. And did she put pink stuff on her cheeks or something? Or is that because she was moving around a lot and it’s gotten warm out? Because her lips don’t look like there’s nothing on them but they’re nice and —
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“—Dare, you okay?”
“Yeah. Tired.”
“You must be.” Why is she frowning? “You looked like you’d just got hypnotized or — you sure you feel normal?”
“M’fine, I just spaced out.”
She’s gonna have him do a thing, isn’t she? “Follow my finger for a little, please?” Ah-ha, see?
Pointer finger extended, he goes along with it for the 10 or so seconds it takes for the slight crease between her eyebrows to relax.
“Please stick out your tongue for me?” is her next request and, uh, why?
Well, he goes ahead and does it for her anyway. The hook ’em horns he makes at the same time are a sure sign he’s in a good-ass mood.
Y/N lets herself smile, then elaborates: “If it came out tilted, it’s a sign of stroke.”
Stroke? That’s a little much.“C’mon, you’re worried I had a stroke?”
She nods once. Her chest expands big as if she were inhaling really deep. “A smoker, extended bed rest, head trauma,” she quietly counts.
Is he hearing things, or does her breathing sound a little too fast?
“Can you point your toes three times?”
He point his toes three times, and yes, her breathing is a little too fast.
“Now please lift both arms parallel to the bed.”
He lifts both arms. The baby chicken is sleeping now and doesn’t wake with the motion.
“Okay,” Y/N whispers to herself.
“Tell me you’re not stressing out about nothin’.”
She blinks a few times and deadpans, “I would never.”
“Here,” he holds the chick near her face. “Get zen like this pipsqueak.”
“But you ain’t ‘nothing’ and you are at an elevated stroke risk.”
He’s only got the one word for her: “Zen.” The hovering motion he made with the chick was a fun touch, the little thing didn’t even mind.
Her expression suggests she’s trying to not smile, and, in a move he doesn’t anticipate, she leans forward to rub her nose on its beak. Her lips brush against his fingertips when she does and his train of thought derails.
Next thing, her hands are overlapping his as she gently takes the chick back and re-wraps it in the washcloth. “’Lil buddy you’re fine, you’re fine,” she coos. “I’ll grab you the hand sanitizer and leave you to some peace, alright man?” she addresses to Daryl, who's still a little distracted, so a grunt and a chin tilt is how he acknowledges this.
Merle would be laughing his ass off right now, goddamn. ‘Sweet lil virgin Darylina’ sounds about what he’d be cackling about.
Y/N flips open the cap with her thumb and squirts the hand stuff onto his palm. Smells like lemons.
So, he didn’t have that stuff before, meaning she’d likely been the one to put it in there when she’d cleaned his tent with Carol. “Hey, um, thanks for the surprise.” Damn, he’s awkward. Smells way better in here.”
“Carol is so wanting to help you in any way she can. I was in it just to see you end up with that pretty floral pillowcase. I had to stop her from hangin' the matching curtains,” she snickers, then waves him goodbye and, boom, leaves.
So…how long until his heartbeat and head stop racing?
------------------------------
You
------------------------------
Yet another stage performance today. You had to act like you weren’t distracted by how boyishly charming Daryl looked lounging there with his shirt unbuttoned to his hecking waist, good Moses. Then the way he snuggled the chick, how your legit lips bumped into his fingers?? He noticed your panicking and was all soothing and shit? Dude, and you were trying to sit like a dainty lady the whole time, too, what a poser.
Still, you think you were convincing. Oscar-worthy. Golden Globe. Emmy. Tony. Somebody hook you up with your EGOT.
Oh, and that little jab at his new pillowcase, aw yes, that was top tier friendzoning! Or — oh, it wasn’t interpreted as flirting, right? No way did you intend that! And hold up, no way he'd even care. It's Daryl.
You've earned a B- so far at being chill, you've got to get that grade up.
So, you are going to go pick fruit, alone, and you’re going to stuff your face because the show is over, you’re off stage for the rest of the day!
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kryannoy · 20 hours ago
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playing with his hair
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genre: fluff
warnings: again, fictional!! no idea how he's actually like
a/n: this is literally just my personal preference of his hair turned into story mode. i will not shut up about his 2024 hairstyle, especially that half tied hair TT
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You always love your boyfriend's, Sitetampo's long hair.
The primary reason he kept his long hair was to hide his face. He's shy, you know that. But the hair suits him so well.
Especially his bleached hair with his natural hair colour peeking out from the roots.
And your favorite hairstyle of his is his half tied up hair. Gosh, he looks so gorgeous and handsome yet pretty and cute!
If he doesn't tie it up, you would take this opportunity to play with his hair—either you really want to play around and try different hairstyles on him or you just want to see the eye candy of his hair half tied up.
You'd do his hair sometimes while he plays video games and when some hair is tickling his face, he has a force of habit of brushing it off with both of his hands, giving it a little shake too, and you'd get mad at him for ruining your hairstyle. He didn't mean to, he didn't realize it.
He'd apologize immediately :(
Then, his head would stay as still as possible. Even having to sacrifice his arms by bringing up his phone to his eye level to keep his head straight so you can do his hair no problem.
The first time you asked permission to play with his hair, he felt awkward because he thought you were gonna judge it and ask when is he ever gonna cut off that long hair of his.
But when you played around so happily, he felt guilty for doubting you.
However, when you tied it up into two pigtails that time, he laughed at his new look but he hated it. So much so he banned you from playing with his hair for about a few months or so.
He missed it tho :(
The feeling of your fingers combing his hair but he really didn't want to see himself in pigtails again >:(
So, he'd nuzzle his head into yours, throwing hints at you to touch his hair again. And when you subconsciously scratch his scalp like he's some cat, he's celebrating for his success on the inside but he can't hide that smirk of his.
You'd once again able to play with his hair BUT he warned you to not make pigtails again.
Somehow, he's fine with silly little hair ties around his hair, but just not pigtails.
Also, one time you tied up half of his hair—just the way you like it—but this time with braids on the sides and GOD, he was so gorgeous and looked so ethereal you had to take pictures from every single angle.
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rylem33 · 3 days ago
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What You Want
Casey sipped her coffee, her shoulders slouched as she stared into her cup. “I just don’t know, Amy. I didn’t mean to quit again, but… well, it just didn’t feel right, you know?”
Amy raised an eyebrow, her fingers tapping against her own mug. “You say that every time, Case. Retail didn’t feel right, the admin job ‘wasn’t a fit,’ the freelancing felt ‘off.’ And now what? The café gig wasn’t cutting it either?”
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Casey’s face reddened as she gave a slight shrug, her gaze fixed downward. “It’s not like I don’t want to work or anything. It’s just that—ugh, I don’t know.” She let out a long sigh, trying to put words to the feeling that seemed to haunt her everywhere she went. “I get there, I try to stay motivated, but something’s missing. I end up feeling like I’m just… floating, like there’s no point to any of it.”
Amy leaned back, her face softening as she regarded Casey with an expression somewhere between pity and understanding. “So, what are you waiting for? You need direction, right? A push?”
Casey felt an uncomfortable twist in her stomach as she nodded half-heartedly. It felt embarrassing, admitting to feeling so lost at her age, especially to Amy, who had everything in her life so perfectly together. “I guess? I don’t know if I need a push, exactly. It’s more like I need to figure out what I even want to be pushed toward.”
Amy smiled, leaning forward with a gleam in her eye. “Then maybe it’s time you tried something different.”
Casey’s face twisted with a skeptical look as she shot Amy a wary glance. “Oh no. I know that look. You’re about to pitch me some wild idea.”
“Well, wild or not, it worked for me, didn’t it?” Amy shot back, her voice firm. “Do you see me vaping anymore?”
Casey rolled her eyes, a faint smirk tugging at her lips. “I still can’t believe you actually did that. Hypnosis? Isn’t that just… mind tricks and creepy suggestions?”
Amy crossed her arms, her expression unrelenting. “Come on, Casey. It’s not like the movies. I mean, yes, you let someone guide your mind, but it’s all about relaxation and suggestion. It’s not like they make you cluck like a chicken. The hypnotherapist I used just helped me focus, made me want to quit. I’m serious; it worked like magic.”
Casey’s interest was piqued, despite herself, but she shrugged it off, unwilling to let herself be swept up in yet another thing that wouldn’t work out. “So, what, they put you in a trance, and you woke up a non-vaper?”
Amy laughed. “Not quite. It’s more like they give your mind a nudge. They plant a suggestion, and it just… sticks. If you give it a try, I’m willing to bet they could help you find some clarity. Maybe even a little confidence boost.”
Casey scrunched her nose, stirring her coffee absently, feeling her initial resistance starting to crack. “I don’t know. It sounds weird, like I’m handing over my brain to someone else.”
“You’re not handing it over; you’re steering it,” Amy countered, her tone insistent. “You’re telling it, ‘Hey, brain, we’re done wandering aimlessly.’ You just need a bit of direction. And seriously, what’s the worst that could happen?”
Casey looked away, chewing her lip as she mulled over Amy’s words. There was a part of her that was almost desperate enough to give in, but fear and embarrassment held her back. She hated that it was always Amy pushing her, while she herself seemed forever stuck on the sidelines, never really going anywhere.
With a heavy sigh, Casey finally met Amy’s gaze. “Fine, I’ll think about it.”
Amy’s face lit up, and she pulled out her phone. “Think about it on the way to your appointment! I’ll book it right now, and trust me—you’re going to feel like a whole new person.”
“Wait—Amy! I didn’t mean right now!” Casey protested, but it was too late.
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Casey sat on the soft, oversized couch in the hypnotherapist’s office, her fingers fidgeting in her lap as she took in her surroundings. The walls were a soothing shade of blue, and calming, ambient music played softly in the background. She glanced at the man sitting across from her—a middle-aged therapist with a warm, reassuring smile and an air of quiet confidence.
“So, Casey,” he began, his voice gentle yet direct, “why don’t you tell me what’s brought you here today?”
Casey hesitated, feeling a bit self-conscious. “Um… well, to be honest, I’m not sure if this is going to work. I mean, I don’t even know what my problem is exactly. I just… I can’t seem to stick to anything.” She sighed, looking down at her hands. “I’ve tried different jobs, different hobbies, but nothing ever feels right. I’m just… floating, I guess.”
The therapist nodded, his gaze steady and nonjudgmental. “So, you’re feeling a lack of direction? A sense that you don’t know where you’re headed or what would give you a real sense of purpose?”
“Exactly,” Casey replied, relieved that he seemed to understand. “It’s not that I’m lazy or that I don’t care. I do… I just… I don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing.”
“And that’s left you feeling, what? Restless? Unsatisfied?”
She nodded slowly. “Yeah, I think that’s it. I want to be… someone, I guess. I want to feel like I know who I am, what I want.”
The therapist’s smile deepened slightly. “I can help you with that, Casey. Through hypnosis, we can start working with your mind to find and reinforce that sense of purpose and self. I’d like to try a session with you today to plant a suggestion that could help you start taking those first steps.”
Casey shifted a little on the couch, nervousness flickering across her face. “I mean, if you think it’ll help. I’m… willing to try.”
“Good,” he replied, his voice reassuring. “All I need you to do is relax, let go, and trust the process. Hypnosis is nothing more than a deeply relaxed state where your mind is open to positive suggestions. I’ll guide you through it, and we’ll start by focusing on that desire you have—to find out what you want and to go after it.”
Casey took a deep breath, nodding. “Alright. Let’s do it.”
The therapist’s tone softened even further, lulling and steady. “Excellent, Casey. Now, just make yourself comfortable, close your eyes… and let yourself sink into that relaxation, letting all the tension fall away…”
Casey’s eyes fluttered closed as she leaned back into the cushions, his words drawing her deeper into a state of calm. The last thing she remembered was his soothing voice leading her down, down into the peaceful quiet, her thoughts melting away into softness as he gently guided her mind….
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Casey blinked in the bright afternoon light as she walked out to meet Amy, still feeling a bit fuzzy from the session. Amy was already on her feet, her expression eager.
“So?” Amy asked, practically bouncing. “How’d it go? Did he put you under? Say anything weird?”
Casey chuckled, running a hand through her hair as she tried to piece her thoughts together. “I… think so?” she said, frowning slightly. “I remember us talking about why I’m so indecisive, and he was really calm, just asking me questions. Then he started telling me to relax, and…” She trailed off, her brow furrowing as she searched her memory. “Honestly, it’s kind of a blank. I know I felt relaxed, but I don’t remember much after that.”
Amy grinned. “Sounds about right. Hypnosis doesn’t always feel like some big, earth-shattering thing right away. But it’ll get in there, work in the background. So maybe next time you’re struggling to make a choice, you’ll just… know what you want.”
Casey snorted. “Yeah, maybe. Though that would be a pretty huge change for me.”
They started strolling down the street, passing a row of little cafés and restaurants. Amy stopped in front of their usual spot, a casual Thai place they both liked. “What do you think? Thai?”
Casey looked at the place, hesitating, a dozen little thoughts flitting through her mind as they always did. It was a comfortable choice, and she wasn’t in the mood to argue or analyze anything. But then, faint and unassuming, a small thought surfaced: You know what you want…
“I mean… I could go for Thai, or maybe…” She found herself glancing across the street at a little Italian bistro they’d mentioned trying a while back. “What about that Italian place? We’ve been saying we should try it.”
Amy gave her a surprised look but shrugged. “Sure, I’m up for it if you are.”
They crossed the street, Casey feeling a bit surprised at herself. That was easier than I thought, she mused. Maybe she’d even try to make a few more decisions for herself to see if it could stick.
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Casey opened the door to her apartment and found Liam lounging on the couch, scrolling through his phone. He looked up and gave her a warm smile as she walked in.
“Hey, you,” he greeted, sitting up. “How was your day?”
She dropped her bag onto a nearby chair, shrugging. “Not bad. Amy kind of roped me into something… unusual.”
Liam raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”
“Yeah, she talked me into going to a hypnotherapist.” Casey laughed, her cheeks flushing a little. “I know, it sounds ridiculous. I didn’t think it would do anything, but…” She paused, glancing away. “It was… interesting.”
Liam’s smile faded a bit, his brow knitting. “Hypnosis? That’s… not something I’d expect from you.”
“Right?” she said, dropping onto the couch next to him. “But Amy swears by it. She thought it might help me feel more… I don’t know, more sure of myself.”
“So did it work?” he asked, searching her face.
Casey shrugged. “I’m not sure. It was all kind of foggy. But I don’t feel any different.”
Liam nodded toward his phone. “Well, I decided to take the guesswork out of dinner for you. I ordered from that Chinese place you like. Should be here soon.”
Normally, Casey would have shrugged and let him make the call; it saved her from agonizing over small decisions. But this time, as the words settled over her, something rose up inside, that faint but clear whisper: You know what you want; you deserve what you want.
She paused, her thoughts surprising even herself. “Actually… I was thinking pizza.”
Liam glanced at her, his expression mildly surprised. “Pizza?”
“Yeah,” she said, feeling a strange firmness in her voice. “There’s that new place on Eighth, the one with the pepperoni rolls I keep hearing about. We should try that.”
“Oh.” He seemed caught off guard but didn’t push back. “Well… maybe next time? I’ve already placed the order.”
The thought flared again, insistent and unwavering. You know what you want.
“Can’t you cancel it?” Casey asked, keeping her tone light but firm. “I really want to try the pizza.”
He blinked, his eyes lingering on her a moment before he nodded slowly. “Yeah, I can call them back. Sure.” He picked up his phone, casting her an uncertain look as he started dialing.
A few minutes later, the order was changed, and the pizza was on its way. They sat together on the couch, Casey feeling a slight, unexpected satisfaction. Liam, on the other hand, seemed to be watching her a little differently, as if trying to piece something together.
“What do you want to watch later?” he asked, leaning back and scrolling through movie options. “I was thinking we could start that new thriller you mentioned last week.”
Usually, Casey would have just gone with whatever he’d chosen, trusting he’d pick something decent. But the same, steady thought surfaced in her mind again: You deserve what you want. And she didn’t want a thriller.
“How about a comedy instead?” she said, keeping her tone casual. “I’m in the mood for something light.”
Liam paused, his thumb hovering over the screen as he glanced at her. “Comedy?” His surprise was barely hidden, though he forced a small smile. “Sure. That’s fine with me.”
They settled on a rom-com, but Casey couldn’t help noticing the way he seemed to study her between scenes, a little more quiet than usual. He was clearly surprised, maybe even a bit thrown off. But, for the first time, Casey didn’t feel like shrinking back or apologizing for pushing a little. Instead, she just felt…certain.
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Casey stepped through the apartment door, her heels clicking on the floor as she set her bag down. She pulled off her blazer revealing a deep cut top, glancing at herself in the hallway mirror and feeling a little thrill. She looked… professional…different.
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Liam looked up from the couch, his eyes widening as he took her in. “Wow,” he said, standing up. “You look… incredible. Where were you all day?”
A smile broke across her face as she walked over, hanging her blazer on the back of a chair. “I was at a law firm,” she said, smoothing down her crisp dress shirt. “I had an interview.”
“Wait, a law firm? An interview?” Liam blinked, looking as if he hadn’t quite heard her right. “What law firm? What for?”
“For an internship,” she said, still smiling. She felt a swell of excitement as she said the words. “This morning, it just… hit me, out of nowhere. I knew what I wanted to do. I want to be a lawyer.”
Liam’s eyebrows shot up. “Just… just like that?”
She nodded, her excitement building as she recounted the day. “Yes. I got up, got dressed, and went straight to the law offices downtown. I walked right in and asked if they had any internships available. I mean, I didn’t take no for an answer.”
Liam stared at her, clearly struggling to keep up. “And they just… hired you?”
Casey grinned, a little proud. “They did. A paid internship while I get my degree. The hiring manager even said she liked my… confidence.” She took a breath, as if reliving the thrill of that moment. “I just felt like I knew it was the right thing. So I went for it.”
Liam was quiet for a long moment, his expression shifting from surprise to something she couldn’t quite read. “So… you’re suddenly going to law school?” he asked, his voice tentative.
Casey shrugged, still feeling that steady certainty. “Yes. I mean, why not? I can handle it.”
He nodded slowly, his face still a mix of confusion and something else, something almost like apprehension. “It’s… a lot to take in. You’ve never talked about wanting to do that before.”
“Well, now I know it’s what I want.” She smiled, giving his hand a quick squeeze. “I’ve never felt this clear before, Liam. Isn’t it exciting?”
Liam returned her smile, though there was a hint of hesitation behind it. “It’s… definitely something.” 
Without breaking her gaze, she stepped closer, pressing her body against his, her hand trailing up to his chest.
“I’ve missed you today,” she murmured, her voice low. “And right now… I want you.”
He shifted uncomfortably, glancing away, his face tense. “Case, I don’t know… I’m not really in the mood right now.”
The words hit her like ice water, and she blinked, her hand pausing on his chest. Not in the mood? A twist of embarrassment mingled with surprise, leaving her momentarily speechless. They’d never been here before; Liam was always so open to her. Why would he say no?
But the embarrassment quickly melted, replaced by a simmering frustration. You know what you want; you deserve what you want. The familiar thought pushed back against the rejection, and she straightened, that tight, unyielding certainty hardening her resolve.
“Come on,” she urged, her voice growing firmer as she leaned in, brushing her lips along his jaw. “I want you, Liam. And I know you want me, too.”
Liam took a small step back, giving her a look that was half apology, half something she couldn’t quite place. “Casey… not tonight, alright? I’m just… not feeling it.”
For a moment, the refusal didn’t compute. She felt her jaw clench, her frustration rising even as a part of her tried to understand. Why would he turn me down?
Her voice was barely more than a whisper. “I don’t get why you’re brushing me off.” She straightened, crossing her arms, her tone sharpening. “I want you, Liam. And you… you should want this, too.”
He ran a hand through his hair, his face tense. “I do… usually. It’s just… tonight’s been a lot, you know?” He gestured vaguely at her, as if she were somehow part of the problem. “You’ve changed so much in the last couple of days, and I’m trying to keep up. I just… I need a bit of time to adjust. That’s all.”
“Adjust?” She scoffed, her voice hardening. “What’s there to adjust to? So I know what I want now. Isn’t that a good thing?”
“Of course it is, but…” He trailed off, frustration clear in his face. “But maybe I need a little space to wrap my head around all of it. You’re coming on so strong, and… I don’t know, Casey, it’s just… a lot.”
She took a step back, the sting of his words settling into her, unfamiliar and uncomfortable. She wanted him, she was clear about it—why should he hesitate? She felt herself bristle at the rejection, her jaw tightening as she held back a retort.
“Fine,” she said finally, her voice icy. “If you’re not interested, then forget it.”
He looked down, his shoulders slumping a bit. “It’s not that I don’t want you, Case. It’s just… tonight, I need a little room. That’s all.”
But she was already heading toward the bedroom without another word, her frustration simmering hotly as she left him standing alone, looking after her in confusion and regret.
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An hour later, Casey emerged from the bedroom, her heart still pounding with frustration. She had slipped into a figure-hugging dress, the kind she rarely wore around Liam, reserving it for occasions she wanted to feel bold, confident, sexy. Her hair cascaded over her shoulders, and she’d touched up her makeup—darkened her lashes, painted her lips a rich, seductive red. She didn’t just look good. She looked powerful.
Liam, sitting at the kitchen table, glanced up from his phone, his eyes widening as he took her in. “Casey…” he began, his voice uncertain, a wary look in his eyes. “Going somewhere?”
“Maybe,” she replied, her voice smooth as silk. She took her time, crossing the room with purpose, letting him watch her, knowing exactly the effect she had on him. She could see his gaze waver, drifting over her, yet the hesitation lingered on his face.
“I thought we could pick up where we left off,” she said, her tone a mixture of suggestion and challenge. “Or… I can head out.”
Liam looked away, a flicker of discomfort crossing his face. “Casey, look, I… I told you. Tonight isn’t a good night for me. I just need a little time.”
Casey felt a surge of irritation rise again. You deserve what you want. The words repeated in her mind, steady and relentless, sparking something bold, almost reckless. She took a step closer, her gaze never leaving his.
“I don’t think you get it, Liam,” she said, her voice low, her tone tight. “I want you. And I don’t want to wait, I don’t want to be patient. I shouldn’t have to.”
He swallowed, looking up at her, clearly taken aback by her intensity. “Case, I… I get that. And I want you too. Just… not right this second. Can’t we talk about this?”
“What’s there to talk about?” she replied, arching an eyebrow, challenging him to answer.
He hesitated, struggling for words. “This just… isn’t like you. You’ve always been easygoing, we never fight over stuff like this. I don’t know why this is suddenly so…” He shook his head, clearly at a loss. “I feel like I’m talking to a different person.”
She studied him, feeling the words echo in her mind, pushing her forward, unwilling to back down. She didn’t respond, but her silence said enough. If he wasn’t going to give her what she wanted, then she’d get it elsewhere.
After a pause, she flashed a cold, daring smile. “Fine. If you don’t want this, I’ll find someone who does.”
She saw the shock flash across his face, but she didn’t wait for a response. She picked up her bag, slipped on her heels, and walked out the door without a backward glance.
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Later that night, Casey found herself in a dim, crowded club. She moved through the crowd, cutting through the room with focused intent. She wasn’t here to waste time. She was here because she wanted something, and tonight she’d have it.
A man stepped into her path, flashing her a grin, his eyes drifting down to her dress. “Hey there,” he said, leaning in close. “You look like you could use a drink.”
She arched an eyebrow, sizing him up with a look that was more appraisal than interest. Attractive enough, sure, but the easy grin and lazy charm grated on her nerves. She could feel the words whispering through her mind, familiar and undeniable: You know what you want; you deserve what you want.
“If I wanted one,” she replied, her voice cold and dismissive, “I’d have gotten it myself.”
The man’s smile faltered, a flash of confusion crossing his face. He let out a nervous chuckle, still hovering too close for her comfort. “Just trying to be friendly.”
She didn’t bother hiding her irritation, her eyes narrowing as she met his gaze, unflinching. “I don’t need you to try.”
Without waiting for a response, she brushed past him, her attention already shifting away, a thrill rising in her chest. She was done humoring anyone who couldn’t give her exactly what she wanted. As she let herself melt into the beat of the music, her eyes caught sight of another man watching her with clear intent.
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Her lips curled into a small, satisfied smile. Now this was more like it.
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Minutes later, Casey found herself pressed against the cool tile wall in the dimly lit bathroom of a club, her fingers tangled in the hair of a man she’d only met minutes before. 
Casey gasped as his hands tightened on her hips, pulling her even closer, her laughter turning into a low, sultry moan. “God, yes,” she breathed, her voice echoing off the tiled walls, “Just like that…”
The man grinned against her neck, and she could feel his breath, hot and ragged. “You like that?” he murmured, his tone a mix of confidence and awe, like he could hardly believe the enthusiasm she was giving him.
“Oh, you have no idea,” she replied, her lips curling into a smirk as her fingers slid over his shoulders. “I want this. I deserve this.”
She let out a soft, reckless laugh, her voice huskier than she’d ever heard it. “Don’t stop,” she commanded, her words sharp with hunger. “I’ve been waiting for this all night.”
As he obliged, she felt herself tip her head back, the orgasm ripping through her. “Yes, yes! That’s exactly what I needed,” she whispered, her voice brimming with satisfaction.
She was finally getting what she deserved, and she loved every second of it.
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It was nearly three in the morning when Casey finally slipped her key into the lock and entered the apartment. She shut the door quietly, already kicking off her heels, when she looked up and froze. Liam was sitting on the couch, his face pale and exhausted, his eyes bloodshot as he looked up at her.
“Casey,” he said, his voice barely a whisper. “Where have you been?”
She rolled her eyes, pulling her bag off her shoulder and setting it on the table. “Out.”
He rose to his feet, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “Out? You’ve been gone for hours. You didn’t answer your phone, you just… left. Do you have any idea what that’s been like?”
She shrugged, heading into the kitchen to grab a glass of water. “I didn’t think you’d be waiting up. You made it pretty clear earlier you didn’t want anything to do with me tonight.”
Liam followed her, his voice shaking with a mix of anger and worry. “I told you I needed some space, not for you to disappear to…” He broke off, his gaze dropping to her, his face clouding with something deeper as he took in her disheveled appearance, her smeared lipstick, her flushed cheeks. “What… did you do tonight, Casey?”
She held his gaze, unflinching. “I wanted you, Liam,” she said, her tone unapologetic. “I made that pretty clear. You refused, so I found someone else who didn’t.”
The words hung in the air, cold and cutting, and she didn’t look away, letting him absorb them.
Liam’s face crumpled as the realization hit, his expression one of raw hurt. “You… you’re serious?”
She took a sip of water, unbothered by the tremor in his voice. “Look, I’m not going to pretend otherwise. I wanted something, and I got it. I don’t see why we have to make this a big deal.”
“A big deal?” His voice cracked, and he took a step back, running a hand over his face. “Casey, do you even hear yourself? You just… you went and slept with someone else, just like that, and now you act like it’s nothing?”
She sighed, her patience thinning. “Liam, you weren’t interested. I was. Why should I go without because you decided not to give me what I wanted?”
He stared at her, his face a mixture of anger, disbelief, and pain. “Because… we’re supposed to be together, Casey. We’re supposed to care about each other, to—”
“We do,” she interrupted, her voice flat. “But that doesn’t mean I should go without the things I want. I deserve to get what I want, Liam. I’m done feeling guilty about that.”
The weight of her words seemed to crush him. His shoulders sagged, and he let out a shaky breath, his eyes rimmed with tears. “I… I don’t know who you are anymore.”
She watched him, unfazed. “That’s not my problem.”
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The next afternoon, Casey met Amy at their usual café. She strolled in, confident and calm, scanning the room until she spotted Amy at a corner table. But as she walked over, she could immediately tell something was off.
Amy looked up, her face tense, her lips pressed into a tight line. As soon as Casey sat down, Amy crossed her arms, fixing her with a hard stare.
“Casey,” Amy began, her voice low and serious. “What happened last night with Liam?”
Casey rolled her eyes, sighing. “Oh, I see he ran to you already. Guess he needed someone to cry to.”
Amy’s eyes flashed with hurt and anger. “Casey, don’t be like that. He was heartbroken when he called me. He told me what you did… what you said to him when you got home. I could barely believe it.”
“Well, it’s the truth,” Casey replied, shrugging, unfazed by Amy’s reaction. “I wanted something, he didn’t want to give it to me, so I found someone who would. I don’t see what the big deal is.”
“The big deal?” Amy’s voice rose slightly, but she forced herself to stay calm. “Casey, you cheated on him. And you acted like it was nothing. That isn’t you. What happened to you?”
Casey scoffed, leaning back, folding her arms. “Maybe I’ve just decided to stop living for what others want, Amy. I deserve to get what I want. I’m not going to sit around waiting for Liam, or anyone else, to catch up with me.”
Amy shook her head slowly, her expression pained. “Casey… do you even remember who you used to be? The friend I knew would never have done this. Do you remember how you stayed up with me all night when I broke up with David? You went out of your way to make sure I felt okay, even though you had to work the next morning.”
Casey shrugged, waving her hand dismissively. “That was different.”
“Different?” Amy’s voice cracked, her eyes searching Casey’s for a trace of the friend she used to know. “Or how about last year, when Liam lost his job, and you helped him look for new ones? You were there for him through everything. You were kind, Casey. You actually cared about people.”
Casey’s mouth tightened as she felt a flicker of irritation rise, her jaw clenching. She didn’t want to hear this, didn’t want to remember it. You know what you want; you deserve what you want.
“People change, Amy,” she replied coldly. “Maybe I’ve just stopped letting everyone else’s problems weigh me down. I’ve moved on, and maybe you should too.”
Amy’s eyes filled with a mixture of sadness and disbelief. “You used to be the most caring person I knew. But now, you’re acting like everyone else should just fall in line because you’ve decided you’re entitled to anything you want.”
Casey’s face hardened. “I don’t need you or Liam lecturing me,” she snapped, her voice icy. “I’m finally going after what makes me feel good, and if that’s too much for you, maybe you should take a look at your own life.”
Amy’s face paled, her eyes wide with shock. “You know what? Fine,” she said, standing up, her chair scraping loudly against the floor. “But don’t come running to me when you realize you’ve pushed everyone who cares about you away.”
Casey met her gaze with a dismissive shrug. “If they can’t handle it, maybe I don’t need them anyway.”
Amy stood there for a moment, hurt and disbelief written across her face, before shaking her head and walking away.
------------------------------------------------------------------------
It was a few months later when Casey spotted Amy walking out of a bookstore. Casey’s heels clicked on the pavement as she approached, a slight smile playing on her lips as she adjusted the strap of her designer handbag. By her side was a man several years older, handsome and impeccably dressed in a tailored suit. He paused as Casey turned toward Amy, observing the interaction with quiet interest.
Amy looked up, her eyes widening as she recognized Casey. “Casey?” She hesitated, glancing at the man at her side before looking back at Casey. “I… I didn’t expect to see you.”
“Hello, Amy,” Casey replied, her tone calm. She glanced at her companion and gave a faint nod, and he offered a polite smile before stepping away to give them some privacy.
Amy took in Casey’s appearance, the designer clothes and effortless confidence, and forced a small, bittersweet smile. “It’s been a while,” she said, folding her arms. “You seem… well.”
“I am,” Casey replied, her eyes fixed on Amy, unwavering. “And I’m glad I ran into you, actually.” She tilted her head, her expression softening slightly. “I’ve decided I want you back in my life, Amy. I want my best friend back.”
Amy let out a soft, humorless laugh, shaking her head. “Casey… I don’t know what you expect, but I don’t think that’s possible. You’re not the person I used to know. You’re not even the kind of friend I can relate to anymore.”
Casey’s smile didn’t falter. In fact, it seemed to widen, a knowing glint in her eyes. “I know,” she said quietly, her voice edged with something unreadable.
Amy frowned, glancing down for a moment, but when she looked back up, Casey was studying her intently. “What—?” Amy started to ask, but then Casey murmured a phrase, a string of words that sounded strange and familiar all at once. Immediately, Amy’s vision blurred, and a sudden wave of dizziness washed over her.
Her hands reached out instinctively, one steadying herself on the brick wall beside her, the other gripping her temple. “Casey… what’s… happening?”
Casey took a step closer, her voice calm, almost soothing. “You see, Amy, after our last talk, I realized I deserved more than just a former friend. I deserved loyalty. I deserved my best friend back, and it turns out,” she smirked, “the hypnotherapist who helped you quit vaping was… very willing to help me, too. Just took a few compromising photos, and he was all too happy to follow my instructions.”
Amy’s dizziness intensified, her eyes unfocused as she struggled to process Casey’s words. She blinked, everything feeling hazy, as Casey’s voice continued.
“So, a few subtle sessions was all it took,” Casey said, her tone like silk. “One follow-up for vaping, another to help ‘reinforce’ your confidence, and I had him plant the right trigger. You see, Amy, I do know what I want, and I deserve what I want. I wanted you to be my best friend… forever.”
The dizziness began to ebb, and Amy slowly straightened, her movements controlled and precise. Her eyes focused, the uncertainty vanishing, replaced by a cold, devoted expression. She looked at Casey, her face suddenly serene, any trace of sadness or resistance erased. She flashed a smile devoid of warmth but filled with complete, unwavering loyalty.
“Casey,” Amy said softly, her voice calm and steady. “Of course. I’ll always be here for you.”
Casey’s own smile widened, satisfied. She took Amy’s hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “I knew you would. After all, best friends are loyal. Isn’t that right?”
Amy nodded, her gaze locked on Casey’s, an unbreakable bond reflected in her eyes. “For now and always,” she replied, her voice a whisper.
Casey released her hand, and turned to welcome the man waiting for her.  As he approached, Casey’s ruthless smile lingered, knowing she finally had everything she wanted.
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thewardenisonthecase · 10 hours ago
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Rest Easy
Lucanis Dellamorte x Grey Warden!Rook
Read on AO3
Summary: Rook can't sleep. Lucanis finds a way to help.
A/N: Technically a sequel to 'Of Nightmares and Sleepless Nights' but can be read on its own.
word count: 692
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The sound of soft steps against the kitchen’s tiles alerted him that she was there. Before, the noise would have driven him into defense mode, but now, he welcomed it.
Lucanis laid in his bed, the book on his hand almost forgotten as he began to think of her. Their relationship was still new, if somewhat uncertain. There had been no grand gestures, like the ones Bellara liked to read. No, their relationship began with an offer of paella and Rook’s favorite drink. It was the least Lucanis could do, after all she had done for him and he knew it wasn’t enough. 
He didn't think he could ever be enough, even if Rook told him otherwise. 
Before he could dwell even more on those thoughts, the door of the pantry slowly opened and he sat on the bed, closing the book. 
“Nightmares again?” 
She nodded. “Same as usual. Archdemons and never ending darkspawn.” She yawned and sat next to him on the bed. 
Her long, brown hair fell down her shoulders. He brushed some of it to the side, placing it behind her ear, giving him a better look at the dark circles underneath her eyes. She covered her mouth as she yawned again. 
“Rook” he said, gently brushing his thumb against her cheek as she turned her face to him “When was the last time you slept?” 
Tired eyes met his. “Didn’t I tell you to call me by my actual name?” She gave him a half smirk. 
“You didn’t answer my question.” 
She sighed and shrugged. “A few days ago? I don’t remember.” 
“That’s not good, you know that.” 
“Says the man who never sleeps.” 
“Ah, but I am not the one leading the team.” He smirked.
“And I’m not the one who has to land a blow against a god.” The two chuckled and Rook put her head on his shoulder. “I just don’t know what to do. Nothing helps - reading, drinking milk, counting sheep. Nothing.” 
“Hmm…” He hummed, thinking on what he could do to help. An idea crossed his mind but he felt unsure about it. Was it too early in their relationship to suggest that? 
“Do it.” Spite, who stood near the door, said. Lucanis tried to ignore him but the demon continued. “It’ll be good. For you. For her.” Spite got closer to him. “Come on.” 
Lucanis sighed heavily. 
“What’s wrong?” Rook asked, lifting her head. 
“Nothing, I-” he breathed deeply, as he cut himself and said “Would you rather sleep here. With me?” 
Rook’s eyes slightly widened. “Lucanis, I- are you sure?” 
The question did not surprise him. For the longest time, the two had struggled with physical touch, and only now were they getting more comfortable. It began with feathery touches, a hand on a shoulder, fingers brushing against each other as they walked side by side. 
“I wouldn’t suggest it if I wasn’t sure.” 
She smirked and shook her head. “I’m much bigger than you, will I even fit on your bed? Won’t you be uncomfortable?” 
“With you by my side? Never.” 
A blush graced Rook’s cheeks as she breathed out “Okay.” 
He smiled and the two began trying to arrange themselves into a comfortable position. They shifted around until finally settling on Rook laying on top of Lucanis, her head and hand on his chest, listening to his heart beat. 
Lucanis settled one arm around her back, while the other held up the book he was reading. 
“Are you sure this is comfortable for you?” She said, looking up at him. “I mean, I almost feel like I’m crushing you.” 
“Dawn.” He said her name, a name she had only confided to him, in a hushed, soft tone. “Everything is fine. Rest easy. I’m not going anywhere.” 
“Promise?” 
“Promise.” 
With that, she closed her eyes and not too long after, she drifted off to sleep, feeling his hand slowly rubbing her back. A pair of wings sprouted from Lucanis’s back as he settled his book down, his other arm came down to embrace her. Spite’s wings encircled around them as Lucanis rested his chin atop her ahead and fell asleep. 
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starry-bi-sky · 26 days ago
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finally giving fem danyal her own au and fulfilling my 'danny is an animal whisperer' agenda at the same time: mother of monsters danyal 2.0
i say "2.0" because TECHNICALLY 'mother of monsters danyal' is an au I made back in June for Dark fem!Danyal (who I promptly named Layal). However, I haven't posted much for her yet, and I like the "mother of monsters" premise too much to leave it only to Layal. Plus Danyal in that au was going to become the mother of monsters anyway, just with significantly less world domination and mass extinction.
'Animal whisperer' Danny has been something I've been thinking about since my latest DP 'wolfpack au' post and it's! So fun to think about, and who no better to assign the idea to than Danyal Al Ghul? Who comes from a family infamously known for their love of animals and nature?
Fem Danyal is just purely self-indulgent. *gestures wildly at her* i just lomvb,,, her,,,, I've only really mentioned her in context of the 'Things in Threes' au/my first Danyal al Ghul au with the facial scar, but she's!!! I love her. She deserves her own au <33
So kill three birds with one stone! Make a post about it.
Anyways, Danny has a large lair. Similar to cult leader danyal, her lair is a giant mountain region resembling nanda parbat with a big temple/palace-like area built into the mountain. It's large, it's overflowing with natural flora, with its own mini-floating islands hovering over some areas, and it's also completely empty.
Danny takes one look at her lair upon first meeting, -- noting that it looked relatively smaller from the outside -- and promptly, with the elegance of an Al Ghul, goes "What the hell??" Because yes, while she does enjoy her own solitude and privacy, this is a bit ridiculous.
For heaven's sake, there's even a massive lake in there! What's she going to do with all this space? Can she make it any smaller? Why is it so big in the first place? This looks borderline like one of the mega-islands!
She finds out later that apparently, the amount of ectoplasm a ghost has can have an effect on the size of their lair. And since she has such a large core, her lair reflects that. Wibbly-wobbly timey-wimey stuff, it's bigger on the inside so it doesn't take up "too much space" on the outside. Don't worry about it too much.
Danyal isn't totally opposed to having such a large lair, she's just... a bit baffled by it. It feels like so much wasted space is all. All this flora and no fauna to enjoy it with. It's practically eerie.
She decorates her temple-palace area, transforming rooms to match her needs as she sees fit. In the center of the inner gardens is a massive tree that she likes to climb, with twisting, winding branches. Sam and Tucker have honorary rooms, even if they can't safely leave the specter speeder for long periods of time, even with proper safety equipment. So does Jazz. Ali (Dani) has one too, but he can actually use that one, and Danny brought him to her lair so he could decorate it himself.
She has a personal garden, but for the most part she lets the flora exist as it is. Too much space to cultivate it en masse anyways.
Skip to a few weeks later, on her next visit to Clockwork. She developed a habit of going to see him semi-regularly just because. She enjoys his wisdom, and he has a lot of stories to tell, and when he's not being the cryptic and esoteric timekeeper, he's a bit goofy.
(pushing my dadwork agenda here,,, i think Danny deserves to go 'hey, Lord Clockwork, do you want me to buy you something' while she's at walmart, only to receive a singular glowing sticky note that says 'cucumber gatorade'.)
(She insists on referring to him with his proper titles even for the most mundane of things because it's proper, but Clockwork sees a future where she eventually calls him "Cee" and by all things in existence is he determined to get there. Anyways,,,)
On her next visit to Clockwork, just as she is about to leave, Clockwork stops her and goes; "Ah, I have something for you. Hold out your hands."
Danny does as such, and Clockwork doesn't give out things often, so her curiosity has spiked to the highest levels. He turns away from her for a moment, using his staff to summon whatever it is he needs, and when he turns around.
He drops a fish into her hands. Granted, a fish in a small glass tank. But a fish nonetheless. A small one, roughly about the size of her finger, with a blue-black, eel-shaped body and four sets of glowing eyes. She can see thin, almost translucent, but spiny fins down its back and the start of bioluminescent markings. It's swimming around in circles in its small container.
"Lord Clockwork." Danyal says all too calmly.
"Yes, Danyal?"
"What is this?"
"That is an adolescent leviathan, Danyal." She’s transfixed onto the tank, but she doesn’t need to see Clockwork’s face to hear the smile he’s stifling.
The myriad of emotions that runs through her all at once threatens to overwhelm her, and she can’t tell if the feelings are negative or positive. So she carefully closes her eyes to breathe in through her nose.
“Clockwork.”
“Ah, I see you’ve dropped formalities.”
She ignores that.
“Why have you given me an adolescent leviathan?”
She's expecting the trickster to look amused when she opens her eyes. Instead, he just looks endeared. "I know you're fond of animals," he says, "and you always look amazed when you come across an animal of the realms. So I thought you might enjoy taking care of the young beast, it's mother is dead so it has no one to care for it."
Oh.
"But, if you don't like it," Clockwork's hands reach out for the tank, "I can simply take it back--"
Danyal shifts the tank out from his reach and hugs it possessively. "I never said that. How do I care for it?"
And so clockwork gives her a list, and when Danyal returns to her lair, she sets up a large tank in her room for the leviathan to swim in -- it's much too small for the lake right now, she thinks. She'll feel better if it's somewhere she can find it. She names him Suhā.
Suhā grows quickly, and by the end of the mortal month she transforms one of the rooms into a large pond for him to swim around in. He's a very loyal beast, recognizing her as it's mother of some kind. Danyal takes great care ensuring that her beastie gets quality care, and Suhā swims to the surface to see her when he senses her in the room.
It spirals from there. Somehow, Pandora catches wind that Clockwork gave her a leviathan, and so the next time Danyal visits the Greater Athens, she gives her a baby chimera. It's eyes are still sealed shut, Danyal can't bring herself to say no. She names the little beastie Firas.
Frostbite hears about it too, and not to be outdone, gives her an animal she's never even heard of. Infinite-realms born, apparently. A fox-like creature with two small horns like an impala, four eyes, and tall legs. The name isn't something she's quite sure how to write down, and she's positive that her friends won't be able to comprehend it. She names her Eira.
Getting the three of them used to each other was... interesting. Suhā tried to eat Firas when Danyal first introduced the two, and they've hated each other ever since. Firas and Eira are seemingly getting along. Her island already feels full enough with the three of them on it.
Of course, that's not the end of it. With her luck, she begins stumbling across other monsters. Realms-borne or otherwise. An injured hydra in the Grecian islands that, through lots of trial and error, Danyal is able to rehabilitate and heal. It routinely comes to visit her afterwards.
A griffin with a broken wing that she moves permanently to the island that likes to keep to itself, but tends to come down when she's near. It gets along best with Firas.
A panther-like monster from the Shades Woods that had six legs and three tails, with ends that reminded her of a venus flytrap. It stuck around the heavy foliage and she can only make out where it was when she saw its golden eyes reflect.
She befriends a young indrik with its leg injured, and much like the hydra it follows her back to her island, and stays there in the mountains. It comes out when she's alone, much like her other beasts.
She receives two more leviathan -- one from clockwork, and one she finds herself while exploring the deeper and darker recesses of the Ghost Zone. It was huddled against the carcass of its mother, and she managed to befriend and get close enough to it to bring it back to her island. Suhā is fully grown by then, with a head bigger than Danyal herself and he still likes to stick her head out of the water for nuzzles when she's near.
He's not very happy with his new siblings, but he's not trying to eat them when she's not looking. So she calls it a win in her book.
And it's not just large beasts either; smaller animals begin popping up when she's not looking. Bird-like creatures and small mammals, and she swears she saw a doe (or something resembling a doe) grazing in the forest while she was walking by.
She takes back with her a lone snake egg once, and it grows so big it wraps around her island and sleeps with its massive head on the mountain beside the temple, like some smaller breed of Jörmungandr.
And on and on it goes. Some of the beasts she comes across never step foot onto her island, some of them follow her back, while others she has to carry back. Not all of the ones that follow her stay, and Danny rehabilitates the injured and releases them when they're fully healed.
It's hectic, and busy, and frankly she loves it. Some of her rehabilitated beasts return to visit her, or to have their children somewhere on the island, or whatever it is they need to do.
She becomes a bit infamous for it. She goes to visit Dorathea once, and as she's walking through the streets she can hear some of the denizens whispering while she walks past.
"Is that her?"
"Her highness' friend? Yes--"
"--that's the one--"
"--Mother of monsters--"
Danny's not sure how to feel about that.
Although, she can't say she's opposed.
Danyal Al Ghul, Mother of monsters, raiser of beasts. It has a nice ring to it.
#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc#dp x dc#dpxdc crossover#danyal al ghul au#dpxdc prompt#fem danny fenton#fem danyal al ghul#mother of monsters danny#if anyone wants to hear about Layal specifically I'd be HAPPY to tell you about her. she's inspired by the song 'scylla' from epic#you can't leave me with dark danny for too long i give him depth if i do. anyways i gave layal mommy issues. she has a complicated view on#danyal and both loves and hates her in equal measure. she killed her out of mercy. she's her mother her sister her other half.#she despises her. she misses her. she'll never see her again. she sees her every time she looks in the mirror. she's 24. she's 10 years old#can you tell that i made layal during a time where i was thinking about the 'dan is danny's kid' dpdc trope bc that's exactly what happened#*holds dad!clockwork up like potato.* 'i just think he's neat :)'#i am incapable of making things only cracky. i must make it meaningful in some way or another.#MMMM i have to cut it off here before it gets too looooNNGGG.#if this flops i'll be sad :((#i just think the idea that danyal has her own little world on her island is neat. she's got dragons and wyrms and serpents and giant wolves#and griffins and one time there's a sphinx although she doesn't stay permanently. Danyal has a blast answering her riddles though.#that panther is based off the dnd displacer beast. there's little salamanders and gazelles with three eyes. there's more sea monsters than#just suhā and the other two leviathans but i couldnt think of any. im obsessed with the sea serpents if you havent notice LMFAO.#there's pegasi and a manticore and a ton of infinite realms monsters that are just an assortment of animals slapped together#the shades woods are a mega-island idea that i had. they're where a bunch of the “shades ghosts” are from. Its this large forest area with#megaflora trees similar to the redwood forest with canopies so thick and wide that no light can reach the bottom. so all of the native faun#living there have adapted to live in the shadows. there are a few villages that live in tall tree houses like the ewok villages that outsid#ghosts can go visit. the panther that's from there is very fond of danyal honestly. anyways yEAH ANIMAL WHISPERER DANNY.#her beasties are all animals up until she's like. 19. where she promptly steals an infant minotaur from a Legends Islands near Pandora#he wasn't being treated well okay!!! she couldn't stand by and watch. his name is asterion. he's a year old. and she'll kill for him.#i dont have enough tags to talk about Damian or her family >:T. just know that i am leaning into her assassin bg as usual :)
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loppiopio · 1 year ago
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i've been sitting on this post for a few days now and it's literally just, me making assumptions about kudos i've noticed on fics lately (particularly aci since i've been checking that fic every week for book club these past few months) and this'll make me seem more insane than i already come off but by this point. how much lower can i go?
just going from top to down as of today.
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[ShibaLee] i know you from your art on here!! tumblr user shibaleeart i'm happy to see more people in potentially enjoying the stories this fandom has to offer :>
[reiscm] shizuchansmilk?? what are youuu doing here? i didn't know you read shizaya fic tbh and i was surprised to see you here suddenly, relatively recently too. does that mean you just started the fic then?? after at least a year of being in the fandom right? maybe this wasn't from your first time reading it (same) but at the very least it shows you visited it not too long ago… i may be delusional in thinking i could be a contributing factor there because, why now? it's not like i'm the only aci advocate out there but i've probably been the most vocal about it around this time soo… well whatever it is, hope you had fun with it! i'm so curious what drrr comedian shizuchansmilk thinks about hit fanfiction a cheap imitation 👁️
i'm also recognising some of the other names around here like [anonymooose] and [durarasaiki] even though i haven't the faintest idea who they might be. i've just been seeing them lately across different shizaya fics which probably means these are the people doing their shizaya fic dive around this time. i have nothing more to add there i just, think it's cool noticing the same names across fics like yeah, we all feasting on the shizaya tag rn.
[ya_boi_twink] it took me a second to recall where i'd recognised your name from and then it hit me. i knoooow you! tumblr user yaboitwink in my notifs… i appreciate you, and i'm glad you liked the things i made for it c:
[bun_o_ween] oh i know you're here because of mr crapo. i hope you guys had fun with it! i wanna take the chance to also admit that like. the moment i found out you were that sebastian writer i experienced the wildest sense of deja vu. because. i had seen your name on ao3 before. but when i checked your fics there was no way i'd read a fic from you?? so then i realised i must have recognised you... through other kudos on other fics??? dude. i must sound crazy, i have no way of proving this because i actually don't remember what fics these were i just vaguely remember it was either bsd or tgcf? that i was looking at fics for, trying to find something to sate my hunger at the time. and i just remember, noticing your name across like a few of these fics in a row and thinking "heh someone else has been going down the same rabbit hole" AND NOW I SEE YOU AND CRAPO OF SHIZAYA FANDOM HITTING IT OFF it was surreal. like. my awareness of you had zero to do with black butler, i could not have predicted that you would have been the random ao3 user i'd seen apparently enjoying some of the same fics i was not too long ago. wow.
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there are like two separate flamingo related names around here [niceflamingo] and [flamingoo] which doesn't mean anything but for some reason they are standing out enough for me to want to mention them. i feel like i've seen ao3 user flamingoo in the kudos of some other fic before but idk.
[Luzki] omg hey!! twitter artist vi_138_ woah hiii funny seeing you here :0 especially like. not so long ago? since i'd imagined you would've been aware of the fandom for a while since you seem more invested in the alts than shizuo and izaya in particular? well it was cool seeing that you'd read this one, i hope ya had fun!
[frogsarefriends] right under that is artist hallucxnating >:O i know they've read the fic already but it was cool to actually recognise their kudo down here, especially since it's like. not recognisable just from the name alone, but you've shared links to this ao3 as your writing so now i know it's you. my impression is that you came into the fandom through slavhew since, i'd connected the dots at some point that you two were friends which. made a lot of sense since i noticed you both started being active around here at the same time lol. but hey!! welcome to the club :D
[7FlyingPancakes7] this is one of the ones i'd noticed earlier on during book club, i distinctly remember checking a chapter while walking home one night (because i do that i guess) then BAM what the hell?? i just see tumblr user mari-lair's ao3 appear down there, totally out of nowhere for me. for context this was a writer from the tpn fandom i recognise from like 4 years ago? idk it's been a while, i didn't talk to them much but they were active in the fandom at the time so i'm familiar with their name. i haven't been keeping up with them but last i'd seen they seemed to be into tbhk with no indication as far as i was aware that they'd shown any interest in shizaya. nothing wrong with that it was just unexpected, so i was just like woah!! how did you get here? i am so curious how they may have come across this fic, was it some rec from a friend? how familiar are they with shizaya? how invested were they in the story and characters? enough to go down more of shizaya's greatest hits? anyways, that was just a fun little small world moment for me.
[psych0tastic] hey isn't this…. axietoh? like, the artist who used to draw shizaya like 5 years ago? what are they doing here so high up the list? 🤔 i have no clue lol i still follow them because i really like their art style but i hadn't noticed their interest in shizaya resurfacing... i suppose they just haven't been too active on these socials in general. anyways their name stood out to me and i was like, wait….. well it's a shocker seeing their name so high up here, were they reading this fic for the first time there or were they revisiting it and happened to have not kudo'd it until then? well anyways, it's nice to see they've revisted the fic within the last two years at least :0 that's cool to me.
[MiyukiWynter] dude i was feeling crazy just now trying to figure out where i'd recognised this name from because i'd swwooooorn i'd seen it from somewhere like as someone on twitter?? i think i was mixing them up in my mind with unrelated (as far as i'm aware) twitter user miiyankhr but turns out they're someone who's fics i've seen in the tags before. i haven't read them myself but apparently they just posted a new one two days ago so that's crazy.
[Dodomka] heyyy it's dodo from twitter, hellooo 👋 they've been the biggest supporter for my deep in the sauce fic tweets and for that i appreciate them very much :3 didn't expect to see them here tbh i wasn't aware of when they'd first read the fic but as i was expanding the list a few times to write up this post i noticed their name here and just thought that was neat. shout-out to them!
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[mochi010] there's a user named mochi that has shown up in my twitter notifs somewhat regularly and they have nothing on their account so i have zero clue what they might be like outside from that they've been liking my shizuo and izaya retweets. their handle isn't even mochi so i have very little reason to believe this could be them but idk, maybe? no conclusion has been made here. well i already spent time writing and cleaning up the paragraph, guess i'm leaving it in.
shout-out to [ouiouipussay] and [ramenflavorpacketsnorter420] just for having some names that stand out lol. i don't recognise you from anywhere but, i guess now i will if i ever come across those names again.
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[Stupidusernamepolicy] i struggled to find you amidst all these names for the writing of this post 💀 had to ctrl+f that shit. but i remember seeing your name here while i was going through the list some days before and being like "oh hey!! it's slavhew :)" but okay there's actually a tangent i've been wanting to go on from here.
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outside of aci i've actually been noticing you and hallucxnating double duo'ing under some fics together, like after the story era which i'd reread after hallu reminded me of its existence in a reply, and also sacramental which i had reread because of your reply, lol. i find this quite funny, just like. this visual representation of you two reading and recommending fics with each other. then you talk about it on twitter and more people like me are visiting this fic too. chain reaction of sharing stories :)
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ALSO [anonymooose] and [durarasaiki] spotted down here in some of these kudos too!! that's craazy. wow. i tell you guys i'm recognising these names i'm not just crazy 😭
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[NotElectricT] this took me a second to dig up again since it's quite buried down that list at this point but the plan i'd had in mind for this post was to end on this one since i saw them kudo it right in front of me (through the vc stream) and i didn't think this post would get as long as it did but... well i already wrote it 😬 but yeah, this is my good friend note! check out this art they made for, still one of their favourite chapters, sharks fly. it's sandwiched in between some squid game au they made for a gift exchange for me..... it's a long story i don't wanna talk about it (embarrassing......)
but what i do wanna talk about!! is how note (referred to as "patient zero" regarding aci book club by the only other patient lol) just decided to read this fic completely of their own volition?? i didn't tell them to do that and for sure didn't expect them of all people to try reading it, ever (they're not really a fic reader) but they just did that, two years ago. and that was like, insane to me at the time because it's seriously so out of their depth guys they don't do enemies to lovers.... they still don't lol. but i was insane about this fic back then with no one to really be insane about it to so i just yelled about it to these friends out of context and i guess???? that was convincing enough to get this one to start the longest fic they'd ever read 💀
i had much fun having someone experience the fic i'd been insane over..... like i'm smiling about it rn thinking about the time i did a live reading of the chainsaw man (as i like to call him) chapter which was so fun i kinda forgot i had a hamilton musical i was supposed to watch that evening... that was awkward. and other chats we exchanged regarding the fic (they were reading chapters whenever they felt like it which i enjoyed because i like pacing these things out) but for some reason (i think things just happened around the time that disrupted the momentum) they never made it past chapter 26 😔 which was tragic to me but oh well....
well i'm am even more insane about this fic now because of this convoluted chain of events that gradually built and cascaded me towards whatever the fuck i'm doing now!! god. i've never made so much, anything, like ever. until now. because both note and rosa (who has not kudo'd this fic as far as i'm aware lol) made the decision beyond my expectations to commit to, a book club. which i organised. and i've been having a lot of fun! so much fun, there's all this wild "marketing" stuff i've been churning out in record fucking time by my standards. i've never felt so creatively fulfilled dude, never finished a thing in my life until these past few months. so that's awesome, and it's in large part because of note having committed to this fic again. so that's some of the story behind that one kudo haha.
and now we're at chapter 49, we're supposed to be talking about it tomorrow, which is today by now since it's 1 am but uhhhhhhh writing is so hard. i was supposed to just be cleaning up this draft i'd written like 5 days ago? i am now very hungry. there's actually more i'd drafted up from here just from more names i recognised as i kept expanding the kudo list that day buuuut i'm fuckeeeen cutting this off right here. i need to stop. the end.
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britneyshakespeare · 10 months ago
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Dresses that are nice but they're only made to fit you if you're 5'5 T____T
#tried on THE CUTEST dress in a medium but the waist was too high up and the skirt wasnt long enough#tried a large then and the waist was too big and the skirt STILL wasnt long enough!!#its the kind of style of dress that's supposed to cover like half your knees. and it didnt. blah#always the cutest dresses that are like long flowy and psychedelic that i like are like that#i did get a nice little green velvet victorian/swingin sixties jacket oh it was SUCH a success tho#i always have good luck with tops but dresses. ugh#i can only wear MINI dresses. bc a mini skirt is supposed to be short on you no matter what#medium-length dresses i have the worst luck with. im not even that tall im 5'7.#tales from diana#there's something weird about the black jeans from old navy#i bought two pairs of jeans at old navy in march of last year. the flare jeans are a size 4 and fit amazing#theyre like stretchy but not cheap and extremely comfy. theyre a typical denim blue#then i also got a straight-leg pair of black jeans. the black jean material is just not right anymore. it's extremely stiff#i know old navy mustve changed their sizes bc i have pants from them that are 5-10 years old (since i stopped growing)#and theyre all different sizes. like. i have old navy pants that are a snug 12 or a loose 4. but it was at least consistent at the time#i was trying on black flare jeans and i had to get an 8. i went in wearing THE SAME jeans i bought back in march#same CUT and everything. and even tho im tall the pants are still longer than what im used to#(im also used to my jeans being somewhat short on me) (so i dont mind it) (its more like they just cover the top of my foot)#the waist. bc i got two sizes up (old navy doesnt do odd number sizes for some reason). it like goes WAY up my waist#tho i dont mind that. im glad we're living in a high-waisted bootcut era. GRATEFUL#but still yeah.#the black jean fabric is just so stiff it's harder to squeeze yourself into even if it fits in the other color denim. u needa size up.#i went shopping w my friend (and kaily) (and our mom) (and then we went out to lunch after) bc i wanted to get her some pants#she's like 5'2 and all the pants were too long on her i felt bad. i bought her some sweaters and shoes#the sweaters were clearance only $6 i was like oh i have no problem getting those for u#still i felt bad bc they didnt have petite sizes in that store. like when she asked they were like 'no only if someone returns'#some other time we'll go to marshall's or tjmaxx >:F
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savage-rhi · 3 months ago
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Cue the pink!
#my gram taught me that there are 3 kinds of people in your life: leaves branches and roots#leaves fly away every season despite the energy the tree gives to them#branch people are hardy and they stick around for a while but one bad storm or one bad cut they fall off#root people nourish and help keep the tree alive and even if the tree gets cut in half they stay until the bitter end#there's nothing wrong with any of these categories we're all someones leaf someone's branch or someone's root#the problem though lies in the fact we don't let nature run its course#when the leaves want to leave let them go#when the branches can't wither the storm let them go#when the roots raise you up let them raise you up and shield them in return#i had a friend i haven't spoken to in years ask me why i got rid of most of my socials and isolated from people irl and online#there's a lot of reasons but it dawned on me that it was because i got so damn tired of chasing leaf people#and fortifying branch people only for them to break off when i (the tree) needed help#and i had to take a long hard look and prune everything#now its a matter of narrowing down my roots and being present with them#i think too thats why im not giving as much of a fuck either in fandom spaces or other spots irl or online cause im tired of the chase#ive been tired of leaves and branches taking me for granted#mostly vent post but i guess im sharing this cause i hope my grams words help ya out in some way today#also one of my familys oldest horses died today and her and gram were close#poor gal just turned 31 i was a baby when she was a baby#got me thinking about my late gram and the recent convo i had with my peep#anyway cue the pink!#magenta is my vent word
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alessandramortt · 4 months ago
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cannot believe the thing that finally gets me to romantically ship furymax is, of all things, my issues with furyjack sjdhskdjd so on brand for me tho
#dont get me wrong furiosa and jack loved each other. in whichever few or many different ways#but like. its like comparing a leaf to a tree. or a seed to a tree.#it was trying SO HARD to be half of what furymax was it would be funny if it wasnt so blown out of proportion#just the seamless teamwork and silent understanding and (manufactured by circumstances) slow trust build up#the two ppl whove been thru so much and have a extraordinarily hard time letting anyone in#learning to trust each other. going from trying to kill each other to giving so much of thenselves to keep the other alive!#like it was so obvious hats what miller intended with furyjack he tried SO HARD#but it was Too Much. back to back 5 sec long shots of them furiosa abd jack looking at each other#like see? SEE? theyre seizing each other up! theyre communicating! theyre gonna eventually work together! SEEEEE??? lmao#and then jacks entire backstory and motivation is one (1) line#and their time together all that trust build up? a single fucking cut#with furymax it was the whole fucking film (it was relatively quick but so well done. just the necessary lingering shots but the rest was#body language and visual storytelling and so well done#maybe bc it wasnt intended to be anything romantic which was absolutely the best fucking choice#probs to tom burke for getting it mostly right. them being romantic only when theyre actually safe is also my preferred version#if it had to happen at all#bc boy dont get the started on the power dynamics and the way his inclusion was a nice lil way to Not have to deal with ppl and joe just#accepting a woman in any position of power at all. and how it kinda takes away from her having probably clawed her way there#also. you cant compete with tom hardys* lips sorry burke#furiosa#furymax#maxiosa#max rockatansky#anti furyjack#more like#furyjack critical#why am i like this tho 😫#i want to like them so bad#furiosa a mad max saga#mad max fury road
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dq1 · 9 months ago
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thinking again
#feel like i have become too complacent with watering myself down into an easily digestible identify for society#partially bc of my career is very conservative.. so#no piercings or tattoos. cut my long hair off to a mens hairstyle. i pass exclusively as a cis straight man as much as i can#especially around the old head bosses i meat#stopped learning japanese even though im mixed so i could learn French because its more useful where i live#i dont want to be useful and i dont want to be seen as some creature mimicking human anatomy like a robot i just want 2 be myself#but ive been doing this so long idk who myself would even be anymore#sometimes i get into old interests i had as a kid and i feel that spark like that 12 yr old didnt die on the inside but then its gone again#i wish a version of myself thats not palatable to my peers could exist#i want to relearn japanese and i want to ride motorcycles and i want to get into certain types of music or clothes#but it also feels like none of it really matters anymore at the same time#if i could be anything i would be a funeral director in nagoya but thats something that can never happen#i shove everything i like down so deep you have to reach to find it#this whole blog is an amalgamation of who i was and who i wished i could be#but being human we r just cursed with bodies that dont feel like our own and having to cut and shape them in a way#that u feel better but not enough so that the people around you are frightened#this is mostly the fact i have avoidant personality disorder and i know i can never be what normal is for most people#i want 2 be myself but myself died somewhere in a past life i think#i am not even human on the inside. half the time i joke w people that im an rpg slime or the human version of those sponge slimes#hence my nickname irl literally being gelo / jello / jelly#and if not that then black German shepherd dogs r also literally just me#but alas i am stuck in a human body#one thats too fat too hairy too sick too broken and i have to deal with it and rebuild myself everyday so people aren't uncomfortable#ANYWAY!!! maybe ill add onto this later ...idk.#to be born again.. sighs.
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