#this starts nov 1
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CASTIEL: Stop. What's the point if you don't mean it? You fear me - not love, not respect, just fear.
[youtube with closed captions]
a godstiel pity party. i'd like to thank an anon i got way back in february of 2021.
#spn#vid#spnamvarchive#so fun fact i started making this more than a year ago. got it 90% done. and then was like no this isn't working#i will come back to this later.#it turns out that i needed to make some videos about cas and angels (the love club + help i'm alive amvs)#in order to make this one. anyway this video is about french mistake robert singer voice season six#i really struggled with it because i could NOT find the thread until i realized that it needed to be literally godstiel pov#it's about love and desire and jealousy and hurt and omnidirectional rage <3#it's about the fact that cas is so utterly dependent on dean for his self-image - however dean sees him that's it#it's about having a moment of reflection about lashing out before you do it but doing it anyway#it's about taking cruelty and dishing it out#and crucially. it's about being pregnant#mpregpocalypse#fun fact: i made a post about working on three season six amvs all the way back in nov. 2022#and only now have they come to fruition (this one + love club + metric)#anyway. have you heard that cas is obsessed#the thing is i do kinda want to add some specific director's commentary here. like the first verse is about cas being like.#incredibly deeply emotionally vulnerable to dean. as in: his emotional state and self-image is totally dominated by what dean thinks of him#and if dean is mad at him. and then the second verse is about... dean upsetting him and him responding to that by Killing Everybody lol#like he has a moment of reflection ['certain regrettable things are now required of me' + killing rachel] where he's like i've 1) also done#bad things and 2) i feel bad about it so maybe i will regret Killing Everyone. but then he does it anyway due to everybody keeps turning#on him. i feel like the rest of the amv is self evident. i guess i should note that 'share a paradise' is about how both of them have#a nostalgic view of the early days of their relationship when it wasn't Like This lol. but everything else i think is self evident.#oh and the reason the other angels flash onscreen with their burned wings at the end is i'm EVOKING the image of cas' wings burning. even#though it doesn't happen. i'm evoking it
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me? done with the comic? yes???????
this is my first longer comic after the staircase scene one i did at the beginning of the year and I'm really happy with my improvement honestly :D
also this is my longest comic at 24 pages which is like, damn i really love these spies don't i
reblogs are really appreciated for this one it was a lot of work :]
#look at the gay people#i love them so much#spies are forever#saf#art#fanart#saf fanart#tin can bros#tin can bros fanart#tcb#agent curt mega#owen carvour#curtwen#starkid#comic#comics#my comic#i started this on nov 3 so it took 1. 5 months which is pretty good
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#please reblog !!!#i’m curious about this#it’s the same energy as when to start christmas. nov 1 or dec 1#but for now: when to start halloween 🤔 lmao#op
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dia de los muertos 🤝 araw ng kaluluwa*
happy halloween but we love our family too
#they start on november 1 and 2 respectively hehehe#love how they both care for family so much#* the official english translation is all souls' day#what we do on that day is that we visit the graveyard of our loved ones and have a nicey nicey picnic there with lola and lolo 💚💚💚#it never felt scary to me because the graveyard is always so clean and full of kalachuchis (flowers) (they smell nice)#seeing that dia de los muertos also has that similar theme is so heartwarming really :) but they just have more color and charm to it#oh correction dia de los muertos takes 2 days so that's nov 1 and 2 but still!!!!#~ rambling#anyways im very excited for halloween! i wanna watch all my fav spooky stuff by then#HOW WE FEELIN ABOUT BOOK OF LIFE REWATCH NUMBER 13 💥#I WATCHED IT TOO MUCH THIS YEAR LOLLLL
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A Few Days Ago…
Me: *washing my hands, minding my business*
Husband: *appears in doorway with a cheeky grin, phone held in hand tilted up as though about to film me*
Me: What are you doing?
Husband: *starts blasting Christmas music*
Me: *splashes him with the water from the sink still on my fingers* IT’S OCTOBER!
#our compromise is that he can start the Christmas music on Nov 1#I can take or leave American thanksgiving in November#but Halloween deserves its own designated time dammit#Star's Mate#Star's Random Rambling
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happy november, everyone. in honor of november, i’m thinking about her
#season 2 monica gallagher effected me personally#the way that she was aware of what she was and what was happening to her#and she admitted to how shitty of a mother she was#AND THEN she tells debbie theyre better off without her and DRIVES AWAY#i could write a whole essay about that scene in 2x12 and im tempted to#(and if it wasn’t obvious november is monica’s season because she came late october and left late november)#actually 2x10 starts nov 1 which is today (where i am)#shameless#monica gallagher#shameless season 2#2x09#2x10#2x11#2x12#chloe webb
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absolute worst thing is watching a show with loads and loads of seasons and you're having thoughts about it but you can't go into the tag for fear of being hit by 1000x Spoiler Beam
#i just finished season 1 of#spn#i started watching it for the bit (nov 5th) but i'm actually really enjoying it#which i honestly didn't really expect?? like if i'm being completely truthful#the only spoiler i have so far is the obvious one and i'd like to keep it that way because i'm invested now#mind you with 15 seasons i think if i saw one spoiler it would be kind of inconsequential because i lot has to happen in that time right#anyway i'll stop going on#i maybe need to change that tag it's quite old#yapping
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“I don’t know why the op said this happened yesterday when this news is four months old”
This may shock you but it’s an election year in the US and even “the lesser evil” utilizes propaganda.
#ra speaks#personal#idk if it’s just that Time of Year already or what#but the amount of#‘WOW look what BIDEN passed !!! this is why we vote blue no matter who <3’ posts is getting nauseating#like sure vote however the fuck you want if you think it will save your own skin#but have you thought for a second. just maybe. the dems are starting ti get scared about November#and instead of idk considering NOT finding genocide they’re distracting us with shiny but impotent baubles?#‘Biden passed an executive order to have undocumented immigrants apply for citizenship in the states!’#okay why didn’t he do that four years ago. why have kids been in cages at the border for four fucking years.#use your damn braincells he’s not a saint he’s a politician trying to get enough goodwill among liberals to scrape together a win in nov.#capping inhaler and insulin prices is great! why the fuck are COVID restrictions getting more and more lax?#cracking down on industrial pollution is great! why did he start and continue pipelines in the west?#we are literally entering another lavender scare trans people are being driven out of Florida and banned in public spaces#roe v wade was overturned with little fanfare student loans remain unforgiven and oh yeah THERES A GENOCIDE TOO#by all means vote for who you want. but you’re not gonna gaslight me into believing Biden was or is a good choice.#‘lesser evil’ ‘we’ll push him left’ ‘we can’t survive trump again’#don’t talk to me about how ‘we’ won’t survive trump again while standing on the corpses of the people who didn’t survive Biden.#at least fucking acknowledge the queers and disabled and poc who died for the lesser evil you love so much.#before telling me I’m a traitor to democracy for voting for who I want to vote for (not genocider 1 or genocider 2)
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#christmas#christmas music#i had a roommate who began nov 1 and it was literally one of many reasons we stopped being roomies#I will tolerate xmas music on xmas day for my family's sake#but I worked at a music store for 2 yrs and 2 christmas seasons so#and like in America Christmas stuff “starts” after Thanksgiving#unfortunately I live in Canada where Thanksgiving is the second week of October#so Christmas is a 2.5 month affair here#truly inspired by all canadians who haven't had their xmas love dented by the xmas season here being long enough to be a literal season
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i hate me
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#(and the Merlin theme was only no 1 because I forgot I had it on loop and accidentally played it for like 30 minutes)#its also impressive that skz was my no 3 artist bc i only started listening to them at the beginning of nov#spotify wrapped#spotify#friday pilots club#bbc merlin#bbc merlin soundtrack#stray kids#fish in a birdcage#aot#aot soundtrack
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happy nanowrimo to all who observe, wish me luck on trying to get as much of the werewolf au done as i can!
#will i finish it? mmm dunno#should be able to finish act 1 and hopefully get through act 2#act 3 is the wild card. hopefully i'll start her but idk if i'll finish her by nov 30
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#maybe… maybe?#fun fact a year ago roughly around this time i was struck with the idea for frmb#i didn’t actually started writing until nov 1 but. i had the idea rotating in my brain mid-october#it was so out of nowhere since i was still entrenched in dc and i’m convinced it was a coping mechanism#because fall 2022… that semester SUCKED. worst one in my entire undergrad#anyway. idk. there’s something there. maybe?#something there wrt me suddenly being smacked with inspo for arañita wip#and like ACTUAL writing inspo#BUT we will see. nothing may even pan out. so we will see
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Ok look. Sometimes when I love a character I want to hurt them. It’s a thing. See what happens. But hear me out. The Sandman X Bloodborne. It’s time for Hob to have a very bad time!
This wasn’t supposed to be my nano yet here we are!!!
Hob disappears after they meet again in 2022. In ways that shouldn’t be possible. Dream looks for him (because they’re friends now!) but can’t find him. He goes to Death, but she can’t either. He’s just gone.
Five years later Hob comes to on the shores of the Dreaming. Where has he been? Yharnam! And he had a bad time.
What does it mean that Hob went somewhere completely not a part of their world and that the Endless have no power? He’s definitely not human anymore, what kind of impact will that have on the universe? Hob comes back scared and not used having relationships and ignorant to any kind of touch that doesn’t come through violence.
What follows is Dream learning how to forgive himself and live through watching Hob teach himself how to be a person again instead of just a hunter, and all that entails. And yes, eventually they get together.
If this becomes a full story someday I might post it idk
#dreamling#nanowrimo#literally I started writing it to get three scenes out of my head on Nov 1#AND HERE WE ARE
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so, this is nice to see. like. sometimes it just feels like i’m not accomplishing anything, right
my ao3 wordcount for 2022, as of today:
that doesn’t include at least 120k of original stuff, if somewhat sleep-deprived memory serves. that doesn’t count the 20k oneshot rotting while i put off finishing the last scene, or the 60k fic that’s just getting started. it doesn’t include ideas i started and pushed aside halfway through.
i hate to risk sounding like i’m bragging but damn. it’s not a lot. it’s not anything, to most people, especially being that it’s free labor.
but that’s half a million words there, easy, and i know all of them are good. i have faith in my competence.
whatever else comes out of this year, i did that much. and i know wren from last november wouldn’t have dreamed of a 500k year, let alone a 500k year i wasn’t even trying to pull. the only person i ever have to impress is my former self, right?
#bird noises#im emo tonight about it#fanfiction#objectively my writing journey is kind of bonkers insane from 2019-now#tried nano for the first time in 2019. super intimidated and stressed. hit 48k#skipped april camp#did 30k for july camp (swiftpaw’s chance baby!)#fuckin. stumbled into the overachievers forum in october#told myself i would set three tiered goals of 50k/75k/100k#but i knew day 1 i was lying to myself#hit 100k nano 2020#accidentally prepped so hard for april camp i wrote 60k in march and collapsed#i donttttt remember july i think i skipped it#came back nano 2021. 125k. started a week early too#130k novel in five weeks and some other work i did in the last couple days of nov#i felt fucking feral for that one#i never properly counted last april but it was somewhere high. 80k?#again#dont remember july’s final number but i do think it came out similar to april#i stopped tracking my words this year sooo#and i donttttt think i got to 100k this month but i just started college i gotta cut myself slack#DEFINITELY over 50k but ill do a final count in the morning#we’ll see
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how shops be fucking acting wwhen November exists:
#one of my biggest pet peeves is this#christmas season does not start in fucking november#it starts at nov 20 THE ABSOLUTE FUCKING EARLIEST#it should start at DEC 1#NOP LATER#I GET THAT THEWRE MAY BE ISSUYES#WHICH IS WHY I SAY NOV 20#BUT STARTING IT BEFORE THE HALLOWEEN DECORATIONS ARE EVEN FUCKING DOWN IS JUST ATROCTIOUS#MUST YOU FIND A NEW LOVER IMMEDIATELY AFTER BURYING YOUR OLD FLAME#FLIRTING IN THE GRAVEYARD TWO PLOTS AWAY?#av-og#av-rb#av-VERY FUCKING SERIOUS
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